#and I know she’s literally the one who says oh shades can be young if they wanna be but then why are Mr 30(?) year old Patrochilles like 40

[izuru-kamakura]

Eurydice is great she literally just gives us good advice and tasty meals and she sings well and I loose herrrr

[slightly-knot-insane]

I Insist

Monstertober 2024 - day 20 + 31 [ Fear of the Dark + Creature Feature ] by @/ozzgin

[ m!psoglavs* x fem!reader ]

*The quite literal translation for 'psoglav' is 'doghead'. They are nasty creatures, scavengers that eat corpses. They are described having human bodies with a dog head, one eye, iron teeth (and possibly hooves)

content: dub-con, gangbang, knife play, p in v, bukakke, biting, oral (both) tw: dub-con, (mention of) discrimination, racial fetishization

You look behind yourself. The street is very poorly lit and the gangs of psoglavs have been an issue in this area for a while. You click your tongue in annoyance. Calling groups of protesting psoglav "gangs" is very disrespectful. They've been discriminated for many years. Only working the worst jobs and suffering constant repression. The recent case of a psoglav child being refused treatment by a racist doctor sparked protests in the city. And they also ignited the darker side of psoglavs, especially at night.

But you know how much people have been unfair toward them. You've been working as a social worker for ten years and the amount of times you had to fight, yell and scream at authorities and your co-workers to stay professional and fair is alarming. And disappointing.

This is not your usual route of going home. The train stopped outside the station since it broke down and you had to walk through this unfamiliar district or go around following a quite longer path. It's an industrial zone and it's completely abandoned this late at night. You, admittedly, didn't think about that or about the lack of street lights. Which is very foolish.

You use your phone's flash to illuminate your path, but it feels like you're in a horror video game. You push your chin deeper into your jacket and walk faster. You don't get far before hearing a familiar sound of iron hooves ringing against the pavement. A group of psoglavs are following you. Shit.

You stop and turn around and your flash illuminates their impressive teeth and whites of their glaring eyes.

"I'm sorry for walking through here," you say. "I had no idea this was your area."

"Oh don't worry, we don't mind," one of them replies. You count four almost glowing eyes surrounding you. "We can help you get through here."

You take a step back, noticing the dangerous note in his voice. "I'm f-fine."

One of them pulls out a knife. "Oh but we insist."

"Wait..." The one whose eye is shining in a deep green shade steps forward. "I know her. She's one of the social workers who helped my nephew stay with my sister. She's... really nice."

The amount of humans and psoglavs that go through your office is too high for you to remember everyone... but you actually do remember this young man. A few weeks ago, he was sitting in the hallway comforting his little nephew while his sister was nervously pacing in front of the office. An immediate thought flashed through your mind - how caring and sweet he was. Not to mention you have a bit of a... thing for psoglavs and their lanky bodies and elongated arms.

"Is she?" The one with the knife relaxes. "That's okay... But she's still a human. I just... don't like them. Not anymore."

Being surrounded with these tall psoglavs fully electrified with conflicting emotions, aggression and frustration - got you sweating. And wet.

"Well, in any case, too bad such an opportunity go to waste." The next second the knife is at your throat, tip pressing against your pulse. You are too scared to swallow. "Unzip, darling."

One of them takes your phone and illuminates you as if you're on the stage. You remove your jacket and it falls to the ground. The knife slides between your breasts as it cuts your blouse. The tip burns your skin as it lightly enters your skin.

"Not even a little yelp?" The one with the knife mocks. "You are so brave." He proceeds to rip and cut your clothes, and his sharp knife makes a few cuts here an there. Soon you're left in your undies, exposed and trembling, covered in small lacerations. Psoglavs lick their lips and growl.

The knife dances across your stomach and ends up pressed just above your clit. You gasp from anticipation. "You're wet, darling. Your panties are soaked. Such a filthy slut you are." He lifts his knife and pulls it to his mouth. The slow dragging of the blade across his moist, steaming tongue sends a throb right into your core. You're no longer sure that the cold is making you tremble.

"Cherry boy!" You're surprised by his bark. The psoglav you know unglues his eyes from you and looks at his most likely leader. "Would you like to taste a human cunt?"

The cute psoglav seems flabbergasted at first, like he didn't understand the question, but then his bright green eye flashes. In one quick jump he's behind you, pulling you backwards with his long arms. He is squeezing your tits and pushing his hand between your legs, rubbing your damp underwear against your moist lips. He is too rough with you and you jolt.

"Ah... sorry!" His voice is less deep than the leader's, less rough, almost velvety. "You are just so... gorgeous. I really want to... fuck you... I've watched so much psoglav and human porn..."

His friends giggle. The young psoglav growls and fondles you harder. His eager, impatient, raspy pants tickle your exposed neck. He is drooling down your bare back. You can only imagine the state this youngsters is in - and that excites you. Especially the hardness pressing against the small of your back. His bony long fingers pinch your nipples. "So pretty... so soft..."

"Bend her down," the leader instructs him. "She is too short for you so I will help you. It's a shame not to use that delicate mouth of hers too."

He pulls out his semi-hard cock out of his jeans just as the young psoglav pushes your back, bending you forward. "I love human asses," he growls and slaps you. "They are so fat, so soft, I just.... nggghh..."

You feel his hot breath on your ass. The first bite is unpleasant and you yelp. "Hey, easy!"

"S-sorry... I just can't control..." His sharp teeth will definitely leave bruises but you're sure he could do a lot worse if he wanted to.

"Let's keep that mouth of yours busy." The leader takes you by your shoulders and lifts you right in front of his red and swollen cock. He doesn't need to tell you anything and you slurp that thing right in your mouth. You always wondered how does psoglav cock taste like. The leader hisses through his teeth, surprised by your action. "Fuck..."

The young psoglav behind you moves your underwear to the side and the next thing you feel is the long and slimy tongue hitting your g-spot like a torpedo. You whimper and wriggle around, but strong arms hold you in place. "Keep sucking my cock you slut, and let my friends have fun with you."

"You taste so good..." Youngster is slurping and humming against your pussy, eating you out like a juicy watermelon. You knees tremble and you have to grab the leaders jeans just to stay on your feet.

"Come on, cherry boy. Get your cock out. We don't have all night."

With an annoyed grunt, the tongue retracts from your core, just as your orgasm was starting to build up. You whimper and buck your hips wanting him to continue. And fast. The two other psoglavs get their leaking cocks out and stroke them on each of your side.

"Fuck..." The nervousness almost breaks young psoglav's voice. He lifts your thigh high up to position himself, lifting you up with his other arm cupping your stomach. He misses once, twice... but the third time your soaked pussy almost sucks him in. "Oh fuck, I'm inside...." His excitement is so adorable. "I... oh fuck... oh fuck... this is so good..."

His thrusts are insecure for mere seconds before they turn impatient and vigorous, catching a delightful rhythm. Your g-spot gets rubbed by his thick cock, the pressure sending pulses of irresistible pleasure. You get slightly dizzy, two strong psoglavs holding you horizontally almost completely lifted in the air, and you just buck your hips chasing your release before it washes over you. Your scream is muffled by a cock shoved down your throat and they barely notice it from all their panting and growls.

"Great job!" the leader praises the ex-virgin. "You made her cum. You will be an excellent lover."

The young psoglav doesn't say anything, but his thrusts become erratic and irregular and, with a low growl ,he grabs your thigh and pushes himself inside your pussy as far as he can go and releases his load into a body for the first time. Probably turned even more on by his and your panting, the rest of psoglavs shoot their loads on your face and back, covering you with their thick and sticky seed.

"Well..." The leader is breathless. He suddenly releases you and you would've fell onto the ground face first if the young psoglav behind you didn't grab you by the hips and helped you up. "This was fun. Thank you for being on our side, human. We'll keep an eye on you."

The three of them push their cocks inside their jeans and walk away. The young psoglav stays a bit longer to make sure you can stand on your own. After fixing himself up, he removes his jacket and places it on your naked shoulders and runs after his friends. But you see his green eye flashing back toward you, at least one more time.

[dragon-kazansky]

Bridgerton shade of blue

Benedict Bridgerton x Female Reader

Benedict bumps into you, quite literally, at a ball while trying to escape his mother's attempts to find him a partner. You decide to humour him with a dance, not realising just how entwined you would become with him. It seems the universe will find every excuse to push you and Benedict together, no matter how much you fight it.

{Masterlist}

{Previous Chapter} - {Next Chapter}

Season one

Chapter Nine - Late night scandals

♡♡♡

"What do you think Bridgerton?"

Benedict turns around to find the artist he had accidentally offended at the gallery the other night.

"This one more to your liking?"

"Mr. Granville--" Benedict raises from his chair to approach the man.

"Perhaps they should take it over to Somerset House so it can be skyed right next to mine."

"I believe I owe you an apology, sir." Benedict says, feeling rather embarrassed.

"Unnecessary. I actually quite enjoy the eloquent stings of your critique. So?" He gestures back to the painting on the wall.

"A touch morose for my tastes," Benedict says.

Henry points to the next one.

"A tragedy. The hound deserved better," Benedict comments.

Granville laughs. "Where is yours?"

"My..."

"Your work," Granville clarifies. "Are you tell me you're not an artist yourself?"

"Well, I-- I suppose sometimes I like to... Well, I mean, I almost--"

"I believe 'yes' and 'thank you' are the words you seek. But either way, you should come by my studio." Mr Granville holds out a small card to Benedict, who accepts it. "The pieces I do for myself are there, and I think you will find my real work far less, um... Oh, how did you put it? 'Cold and lacking inner life?'"

Benedict scrunched up his face as he nodded, still burning with embarrassment. "I shall never live that down, shall I?"

Mr Granville leaves.

Benedict returns to his table where he had been absentmindedly doodling. Eyes. He was sketching out a pair of eyes. Pretty ones. From memory.

He sighs and closes the sketchbook.

♡♡♡

As you sit in the drawing room of the Bridgerton house, as invited by Violet, you discover that she had no idea about the boxing match, or that Daphne had been there.

You keep your eyes focused on the latest Whistledown paper, though you had stopped reading it.

Daphne was playing the piano while her mother interrogated her.

"A boxing match is no place for any young lady." Violet sighs.

"Is it a place for a prince? Was he at today's match, sister?" Hyacinth asks.

"He certainly was."

"It is a loathsome and barbarous form of entertainment," Violet was very displeased.

That was when Daphne took the opportunity to mention you had gone as well, which had Violet looking at you.

"You too?"

You glare softly at Daphne, who gives you a smug little look. Crafty one, she is.

"Anthony invited me," you admit.

Violet looked terribly ill all of a sudden. You were sure she would being this up with her eldest son at some point.

"What about the duke?" Hyacinth asks.

"What about the duke?" Both Violet and Daphne ask at the same time. You eye Daphne curiously from your seat.

"Was he also present?" Hyacinth asked, less enthusiastic now.

"I do not know," Daphne says. "If the duke was there, I did not see him."

Hyacinth leaves the piano to go see what Eloise is up to. She had been scribbling away in her book since you arrived.

You put the Whistledown column down and rose from your seat to seek entertainment near the window. Watching the street was surely more entertainment than listening in on that conversation.

Anthony enters the room and greets both his mother and his sister. You turn and he greets you too.

"Did you truly take your sister to a boxing match?" Violet hounds him.

"Your admonishment will have to wait. I have news," he cuts her lecture short. "Prince Friedrich has asked for my permission to propose." He looks at Daphne.

She stops playing. "So soon?"

"Well, what did you tell him?" Violet asks.

"That I know better than to answer for my sister. I have no objections to the man. People speak well of him. Whatever you decide, Daph, you shall have my support."

You look at Daphne quietly.

"I... uh... I..." She doesn't know what to say.

"You need not decide now," Violet tells her. "You certainly have no known him long."

"Let me know when you have an answer, and I shall convey it." Anthony says to his sister.

"Indeed." Daphne looks at him.

Anthony leaves as quickly as he came in. It was clear Daphne needed time to think.

♡♡♡

When Daphne had pleaded with you to attend the next ball with her, you couldn't say no. There was a sadness to her gaze, and you wondered from where it had risen.

Something had happened between her and the duke, and she had been off kilter ever since.

The ball, like all had been so far, was wonderful. The theme was a little more out there this time, but everyone was behaving quite perfectly.

You were standing with Daphne as she scanned the crowd. Exactly who she was looking for, you weren't quite certain. You would suggest the prince on the account that the duke was apparently leaving London tonight.

The prince could be seen across the room. He was in conversation with someone. You glance toward Daphne, but your gaze shifts as Cressida Cowper comes over. You give Daphne a gentle nudge.

"Daphne." Cressida chuckles. "You look beautiful, as always."

"Thank you, Cressida," Daphne says politely.

"You could have chosen anyone," Cressida says. "You have gentlemen lined up to pay you tribute. Yet you did not hesitate to steal my chance for happiness away, did you? I knew the marriage market would make rivals of us, but I never thought youcapable of being my enemy."

"The man made his choice, Cressida. What did you expect me to do?" Daphne asks.

Daphne walks off in the direction of the prince. You look at Cressida and then walk off in the other direction.

There is nothing you could ever say to her.

You begin to walk alongside the dance floor, watching the couples dance. A hand comes into view, and you turn to see a friendly looking young man smiling at you.

"May I have this dance?"

You take a moment to gather yourself. You had hoped one of the Bridgerton boys would be here to dance with you, but you supposed you couldn't rely on them every time.

"You may."

You go with him to dance.

It seemed Benedict wasn't here.

♡♡♡

Benedict was, in fact, making his way to the studio of Mr. Granville. He was intrigued by the artist.

He finds the address and knocks on the door. Henry Granville answers.

"Mr. Bridgerton."

Benedict stands there a little awkwardly.

"Come in, come in."

Granville lets him in. Benedict enters and follows him. He is led further inside and finds himself in a large room. A circle of easels presented around two nude models.

"I do not know what I was expecting, but it surely was not this." Benedict says.

"Oh, simply a gathering of like-minded souls." Henry tells him. "Here, let me show you what I've been working on."

Benedict is led further inside the studio. He passes a couple of painters discussing war so causally.

"What do you think?" Henry asks.

Benedict walks over and takes a look at the canvas.

"Hmm. It's a far cry from Somerset House, I must say."

"I shall take that a compliment."

They both chuckle.

"And I must say, I'm truly jealous. Is this your life?" Benedict asks.

"There are advantages to being the second-born." Henry tells him. "Heirs have the responsibility. Second sons have the fun."

They both chuckle again.

"So... why not go have some fun?" Henry gestures to the models. He's giving Benedict the chance to epress himself through art.

Benedict picks an easel and sits down.

♡♡♡

As you dance once again tonight, you spot Anthony standing off to the side. He's staring at the opera singer.

You hard heard whispers about him being infatuated with an opera singer, but had no idea if there lay any truth to them.

You continue dancing with your partner.

Benedict was still a no-show tonight, which you found to be rather disappointing. You had been looking forward to another evening of his little quips and teasing.

When the dance ends, you curtsy to your partner and head in the direction of Anthony and Violet. Lady Bridgerton had tries to introduce her son to a rather pretty young lady, but he showed no interest.

"Shall we dance, Lord Bridgerton?" You ask, looking at Anthony.

He turns and looks at you, for half a second, thinking you were another lady his mother was intent on pushing on him.

"Yes, let's." He offers his arm, and you take it. Violet watches you both go. Even if he chose you, she would be pleased, but she knows her son will not take you as his wife. You're his friend who has come to rescue him from her for a while.

Violet downs a third glass of champagne.

"She is persistent," you say.

"Hm?"

"Your mother."

Anthony chuckles softly. "Yes. Quite."

"The opera singer..."

He looks at you.

"Nevermind. Its not my business."

Anthony's expression softens. "I was - am - found of her."

"Yes. I assumed as much."

Anthony sighs. "It's complicated.

You nod and say no more on the matter. Anthony spins you around elegantly.

"Is Benedict not here tonight?" You ask, twirling with him.

"Benedict? No." He gazes at you. "Why do you ask?"

"I just noticed his absence."

"Missing your dance partner?" He teases.

You chuckle. "Am I that obvious?"

He winks at you, and you shake your head with a smile. "I'm fond of you boys. I can't help it when I notice one of you is missing."

Anthony grins. "How lucky we are to have gained such a special friend such as you."

As Anthony gives you another turn around the floor, you spot Colin speaking with Penelope. You smile softly at the sight and then turn your attention back to the eldest brother.

At least you'll have one Bridgerton on your dance card tonight.

As the next dance begins, Anthony keeps your company longer. You're aware this may catch attention from others, especially Lady Whistledown should she be here, but none the less, you dance with him twice.

You soon see that Colin has left Penelope on the sidelines to dance with Miss Thompson, and you also find the prince talking to Daphne amidst their dance.

The dance ends, and you manage to catch sight of Daphne fleeing the ballroom.

Anthony bows, and you curtsy.

"Until next time." He nods his head at you. You smile and nod, taking your leave. You worry about Daphne and intend to go check on her, but you're stopped by another gentleman.

You sigh and realise you'll have to dance with him before you can flee again.

The dance feels like it drags on, and on, and on. You smile, you listen to your partner talk, but your mind is focused on Daphne. She did not look well when she fled.

When the dance ends, you spot Anthony leaving the ballroom. You waste no more time and follow him.

He heads outside. You follow.

"Anthony?"

He turns and looks at you. "Go back inside."

"What's the matter? What's happening?"

"Did you see him?" Anthony asks urgently.

"Who?"

"The duke."

"He is here?"

"He was, and now I can't find Daphne." You realise he's concerned about his sister.

You hear something further in the garden, and Anthony hurries off. You follow him, close on his heels.

What you find is not what you ever expected to see.

Simon and Daphne were not just kissing. His hands were all over her. Her dress had been pulled down. You cover your mouth, though you can not hide the gasp that escapes you.

Anthony runs at Simon.

"Bastard!"

Simon receives a strong punch to the face. He falls to the ground, and Anthony takes another swing. He punches him a third time and then stands beside his sister. You hurry to her other side and checks her over.

"Daphne..."

She is speechless. She has no words for you. They have been caught in a compromising position.

"You will marry her," Anthony declares.

"What?" Daphne looks at her brother.

"Immediately. We can only hope no one saw you take such liberties, and my sister is saved further mortification. You will marry her!"

Anthony is angry.

"Brother!"

"I cannot marry her," Simon says.

"You have defiled her innocence, and now you refuse her hand? I knew you were a rake, Hastings, I never thought you a villain."

"I cannot marry her," Simon states more firmly.

Daphne looks hurt.

"Then you leave me no choice. I must demand satisfaction."

"A duel? Anthony, you cannot--" Daphne begins.

"He dishonours you, sister." Anthony looks at her. "He dishonours you and me and the very Bridgerton name. I have misjudged you, indeed. You have duped us both, but I shall not see my sister pay for my own misdeeds. We will settle this as gentlemen."

"I understand," Simon agrees. "I shall see you at dawn."

"I do not understand," Daphne says softly. "You would rather die than marry me?"

You look at Simon quietly.

"I am truly sorry."

"We need to go, Daph. Before anyone should see us." Anthony says softly.

You reach out for her arm gently and pull her away, Anthony follows you both.

Daphne takes her brother's arm after he begs of you not to say a word about anything. You swear by it, looking him in the eye. Anthony thanks you.

You drift off from them as you enter the ballroom once again.

Anthony approaches Colin and tells him he is taking her home. He asks Colin to take care of their mother. You decide to step in and help. Anthony looks grateful.

Anthony and Daphne leave.

Colin looks at you, but you just smile softly at him and ask him to help you with Violet. He doesn't say anything about Daphne or Anthony.

Neither do you.

♡♡♡

@callmemana - @lilscast - @imgondeletedis - @benedictbridgertonss - @clownsdiehard - @wxnterwidow333

@sillynilly27 - @autumn-slaves - @ben-has-arrived - @ajdelilah - @aadu2173

@booknerdlife - @tamlinrose - @sarahskywalker-amidala - @cheryyluv - @louschan - @lou-la-lou - @cultish-corner

@hopshusushi - @katherinejess - @nannabug - @afunkyfreshblog - @f0x33 - @dd122004dd

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@ms-fandomgirl - @fablesrose - @anyaisinyourcloset - @meowzerzstuff - @orchiidflwer - @bespinnn - @crazymar15

@cosmixstar - @bree3parchen -

[pro-sipper]

Had such a fun conversation with my therapist today. Honestly I'd been wanting to bring up the whole pro/anti debacle with her just to see what she'd say and how it would stack up against what proshippers and antishippers have to say about therapy online. No points for correctly guessing which side she agreed with

I talked about my job for about 3/5ths of the time there, then segued into The Discourse by telling her about how I'd been writing daily during the first two weeks of my new job, but hadn't been as active lately

And I even asked her if she had any other chronically online clients she talked to and she reassured me that she had plenty, and even one who had kind of explained this whole debate to her before (from a proshipper stance, and how she lost a friend over it)

I explained my whole issue with her about how fandom is so deep into purity culture these days. And how reckless and raunchy it was in the 00s and how I don't want to go back to that, but there's got to be some middle ground somewhere.

I told her about some of the stuff I've written and all the weird or nasty comments I've gotten on it and how that can be discouraging. And I told her that most of my works are smut, and of those smut works, all of them have at least a little sprinkling of trauma in them. And she said that can be a good way to look at things. And used a real life example of how something could be awful but there could be good things about it too. Specifically saying that nothing is just black and white, everything has shades of grey. And that digging the little good out of the big bad is a positive thing, actually

And I told her about being a young teen and reading a fic with incest in it and having the sense not to immediately jump to "I want to recreate this in real life" and she was like "Yes, exactly. It's like this one book I read, umm..." and I was like "Flowers In The Attic?" just as a guess and she was like "Yes!" and said just because you read about something doesn't mean you want it to be your reality

And I did my best to explain the whole concept of how some people seem to think that everyone engages with fiction by putting themselves in the shoes of the main character, so if the main character is doing awful things then you must want to do awful things too. Which of course she said was in no way true

And she told me that she was such a big fan of horror movies and loved to watch those as a way to relax and unwind bc it gets her mind off her work, but that doesn't mean she wants to be a killer lol. And I had to be like "Oh no you don't understand. They think killing and torture and cannibalism is totally fine, it's just when you bring sex into the equation that people start freaking out" and she was confused at that lol

And of course she thought it was ridiculous that people can get called a pedo or a groomer or whatever other awful things over fictional stories.

So yeah it was a fun and reassuring conversation. I know I'm leaving some stuff out but I can't remember any more specifics of what was said. Plus I was talking a mile a minute bc I wanted to say everything on my mind before time was up asfdsfs it was a monumental task.

OH and I even brought up how people will literally say "well my therapist said..." just for some other people to accuse them of lying or saying their therapist is corrupt or some other bullshit which she was understandably aghast at. Because she is a licensed therapist who went to Therapy School and knows better, and is not a magical villain promoting propaganda fed to her by Big Proship to corrupt her clients. You know how it is <3

[saoirseyun]

— .ᐟ ౨ৎ . . . 𝐭𝐚𝐤𝐞 𝐜𝐚𝐫𝐞. 001

𝖲𝖸𝖭𝖮𝖯𝖲𝖨𝖲 — today is the day, at last. much less to your own relief, however. attending your wedding in the local prefecture, aomori; and leave once and for all that drenched life in the brothel... let's only hope that you last in your new life.

𝖢𝖮𝖭𝖳𝖤𝖭𝖳 𝖶𝖠𝖱𝖭𝖨𝖭𝖦 — unreliable narrator, bad writing? idk its been a while since i wrote long works, blunt humor, mentions of sex, taboos, historical inaccuracies, unsettling behavior from dazai, possibly poor depictions of Japanese culture, no beta we die like oda

𝖠𝖴𝖳𝖧𝖮𝖱'𝖲 𝖭𝖮𝖳𝖤 — happy new year & rn im screaming crying bc here it is! my first fic after march 30th. please do enjoy to your heart's content~

𝖶𝖮𝖱𝖣 𝖢𝖮𝖴𝖭𝖳 — 3.0k words, partially proofread

CHECK OUT HALF AN HOUR FOR LOVE, OVERVIEW.

Japanese terminology; kamuro - a female child servant who serves courtesans temporarily until they graduate. shinzō - a young female servant, older than the kamuros, who also serves courtesans but has now been fully bought by the brothel. one/ne - to refer an older sister. obasan - "aunt" or "middle-aged woman" in Japanese. kitsune no yomeiri - a folktale about foxes having a wedding. The belief varies between being a good omen or a bad omen. nanakorobi yaoki - Japanese proverb for resilience. kanji - Japanese writing system in the form of borrowed Chinese characters.

Honorifics; chan - Term of endearment. san - One with respect. sama - One with higher respect and is formal. dono - Literally used like "My lord." ue - Denotes a high status.

𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐅𝐈𝐑𝐒𝐓 𝐍𝐈𝐆𝐇𝐓.

It poured rain that day; paint the skies with suspense and tension between the pristine clouds, a sunshower. When a beloved shinzō gingerly applied a sweet shade of peach blush to your cheeks and covered your face in salient white powder; stroking bold, black liner to your lower lid with a thin brush as to regard high standards of beauty whilst you remain aimless to admire the falling drops of water hit the eaves of your dormitory—drip back to the ground. You were at the least comforted with the weather's appearance coming abroad to stay as your companion, however still, oh so not much relaxed with the hour of your wedding ticks close to its arrival. You didn't even have a single chance to know who is taking your hand in marriage, for goodness sake. A subtly, a few weeks back you were informed by a close woman that a fine gentleman is likely interested in getting committed to you...

You've perk at the voice of the 30-year-old shinzō. In question, belongs to beloved friendly Akashi. Genuinely the definition of safe haven in your case if it counts close friends. "Oi, Jun'ai! A fine fellow been's collective to have you as his own, aren't you aware? Madam-sama does keeping 'em around too! By the teahouse." Her accent's rough and undoubtedly native to common farm villages—and also not forgetting to mention that charisma's energetic and careless as ever today, without a doubt of surprise of course. And bright yells as the poor Akashi had such terrible hearing, she'll never know how loud she is. Gushing you over to the area, finding the old lady herself amidst the aftermath of such agreement, dare say. There's a signed paper with extravagant black ink, strokes elegant front of the elder—smirking with pride regardless of you chiming in to inquire about the stranger.

Who, you may ask, but she simply says that it's best to keep it a surprise… You weren't able to keep composure since that day.

As who does that?! Outrageous, utterly outrageous, you'd whisper harsh mutters only thinking about it even a single time in a day. Oftentimes resist the urge of cursing at that damn woman for casting you aside in saving grace for the brothel's funding and, many of other's finances.

Eyeing your dear assistant tuck delicate, golden pins and fine décor to your lovely hair—all you can do in anticipation was hope he was also a good-looking, refined man who wasn't either younger or older than your age. Preferably of status, sure, that's a most likely. He manages to pay double the amount for you to leave your workplace, after all. He has to be, otherwise you're immediately disappointed by your own lack of judgement. You need to be a lot more cruel to yourself, but it hurts plentiful.

"...Nee-san? Are you feeling okay?" Voiced the young 14-year-old. Who consist attentive to adding your makeup to the delicate skin and face. Her face visuals a pit of worry you'd rarely see in this type of workload. You weren't even sure how to react. "I will be all right," Is what you answered reluctantly.

But the shinzō knew you best.

She was drowning into you eyes a lot more personal, and, rather heartwarming. A sigh. "Ōnami-chan, I beg. It's not of high relevance..."

"If it refers to you, then it has to be." The younger girl insists while she timid to touch your sleeve. Still much a grown-up child, sometimes you forget that too... Your fingers met the scalp of your head out of stress and uncertainty of what to put it. "...Trust me now. This can be excused." Despite having this unsaturated need to tell your closest servant everything without regard and loosening the grasps of staying ideally perfect, no complaints.

The only thing you were to offer in the end was a weightless fondle in her neat hair. Affection like being a genuine member of one's family or just reassuring an immature girl who, yes—older and very well more aware, still innocent and a tiny tad bit of cluelessness. Two reasons can go a long way.

Perhaps she wondered to your conflicted state as to why the reaction. The situation at hand is, at least by an outsider's perspective, is dream-like. Watching her older sister, the woman she has served since childhood to be married off to some well-known or not handsome noble of the court. What fantasy, unfortunately it's our reality.

"Nee-san, do you adore him to some degree?" How where you to speak to a question as broad and vague as this... That you were obviously not into a man that you didn't even knew existed, how could one love? "To be frank, I am not the most interested..." Even when the life of nobility and esteemed high ranks sound greatly to one's likely. "I can't help imagine but break the poor man's heart sooner or later if it so be it. Either that or potentially unhappy in my own marriage."

"Will I last more than a month there?"

The answer to such is as unclear as midday mist, compared at even evening's pouring drops of rain.

"...Do me a favor, Ōnami-chan. Visit me once in a while—let's say every other month. Then, must you always be sure that I am well and whether or not I'm returning back to this life. I'll write a letter to a buddhist temple in case."

It was too much to do out your own distrust and anxiety in him, of course. Maybe you're exaggerating, and yet only can the Gods know what may happen in time's passing. The most richest people of them all tends to be the nastiest... Heeding your words, the shinzō smiles.

"Okay!" A certain heartfelt warm in your veins. The little girl Ōnami was sure to keep that to her mind.

With the bare minimum of excitement inside of your heart, you've scurry yourself out of the brothel as a final leave to your old world into the carriage—hurriedly saying spoken goodbyes to the kind workers and fellow courtesans, the sweet little kamuros reckless to play out their times in the stunning gardens and hardworking shinzōs… And, yes, of course—do not forget your Obasan on the way. She might as well demean your name quicker in the whorehouse than disgracing the family bloodline and lineage. That out of your way at last, seated on the backseat as the couch leaves the Red Lantern District. To which, the moving world in the foreground of your eyes although you've went into a state of another faint reverie inside your head. On which the scenery fades and soon, a vivid trance that can only be described as unexplainable. Inexplicable dread to your veins just raises your discomfort knowing that you... You were living fine well enough. But... but of course! Why wouldn't the Madam accept such rising numbers on papers? What else was there to make of the situation than romanticise? You must be at least sicker than a loose serial killer.

Stiff optimism fixates your face. Looking out to the carrier and spot every little couple on the roads complete such mundane tasks together under the rain in a sake of not facing loneliness. You weren't sure of a word anymore on what to do. However, making these ceremonies intercept to that kind of point... Ah, how it sickens. The way of ill that's akin to the waves disrupt your unfortunate stomach during a sail travel. In all actuality—case in point—its sensation were although too alike to what you're going through at the moment attending to the wedding. The silence deafens you to a premature funeral! Hearing voices now seems a lot more comforting.

Alas, onwards moment's finality, the carriage stops to the relief of the body. Motion itself places to a hault and your entourage of men escorts you off the ride with the protection of an umbrella covering your head. Here's when your form itself took full stillness and enters a sort, self-control state. Your movements are gracious as ever but you're definitely not moving as to avail. You could only think what's to come. Relentless. Think of your life, over and endless until the head's decomposed itself into liquids. Not even the presence of the clan head's eldest child manages to snap you out of musing.

"...You should be the luxurious Jun'ai-san, is that correct?" The woman sat across the table from yours. She was calm and obviously held regard to such respect in the house as murmurs and shy stares from young maidens chatter about her in disclose, their own little fantasy, a kind of imagination you've grown used to from those disgusting men in the sex industry. What pigs. You've snapped back, forcing your head to the topic at hand as ahe serves the matcha tea. You nod, "Splendid. Then may you refer to me as Dazai Masako, if you will. I'm glad that you're able to make it to our humble mansion." You twinkle at her words and show signs of flattery—although having heard exchanges like these from wealthy clients in the past... "The pleasure is mine to meet you."

"I'm sure you're aware why I've arrived?" You inquire, to be more certain as Masako then flicks her head. Only for it to fade into a slight, disappointed frown. "...Marry my younger brother Osamu, yes, I'm acknowledged. Pardon my critique, however, kind lady. Except you're prohibited to fully engage with my son." Says the clan head's eldest—the sister—who... Pause, what? Hold on. Now hasn't the supervisor explained to you in person that the wedding's immediate? Today, in particular! "Yes, originally so." Masako clarifies, she gestures to an open windows. "Yet as you may noticed much earlier before entering the abode, the weather is not ideal. Therefore, shall it grant misfortune over the lovebirds and ruin the gathering for guests alike. My sincerest apologies..." White powder stains light to your fingertips as you can't foresee this day getting doubled the horrible! It's a tragedy... In your entire own sense, there is not a single opportunity at chance will you ride a half-soggy carriage of return. You didn't knew the folklore of kitsune no yomeiri migrated to Aomori as well. Dazai-ue continues,

"It would be our honour to offer the comfort hospitality of this house. And I suppose it shan't be an issue for you to see him at once. It surely have been long way here to Aomori, yes? We will discuss the formalities soon after meeting Osamu..." ...Roughly translates to tomorrow. The head of the clan's task for you to see him by now seems too easy, but it had to be some pity.

"...Yes." A reluctant answer to your rose-colored lips. Did the products still look good after cold winds meet the face? "How generous of you, ma'am. I prolong my gratitude. For I, can only but offer a mere humble."

It was what matters. You'll commit to this man whether or not you do fundamentally enjoy it—so might as well take a glance at his face. None double taking as you took another deep breath with a servant leading to his room, finally, you think. Meeting him for the first time, when that gluttonous madam of yours hide him from you. Left to the hands of a darling female maid as she takes you to where he resides, parade the prestigious, elegant halls of your presence and careful to approach that damn door and feast your pure eyes.

Said gentle-hearted patron proceeds to leave your wake upon reaching the door facing front of you right now, a polite bow. Gesturing her leave. and instead went off and serve his... Siblings? Assuming so. As your head catches sights of a small, worn-out family portrait next to the door. Clear to not tell which one is Dazai Osamu. Right, right. Your supposed've, soon-to-be husband and hand in marriage, The Dazai Osamu... It's quite bothersome—ponder what's so special about this name particularly and not the father's? Better question yet, why must every woman gossip with a slither of his mention among useless conversations? Now you can't get Dazai Osamu's name out of your head.

And for one reason.

The noise, bleak and rather frank done as if swift in action, behind you caught you off guard and the little silhouette of that man.

"...Dazai-dono, is that correct?" Is what you've been instinctively told by your own gut to try and receive the brunet noble's attention away from the stillness of beautiful ornamental flowers. Unbothered, frozen in the skilled crafts of capture life through the hands of clay and fine arts. Frightened to your snicker, he awkwardly reaches for his fallen smoking pipe. Well, that should be the one causing the single noise but how on earth is it so full of volume...? Can that be a thing?

"And who else shall it be, the one and only, sweetheart?"

His movements—grace akin to the shows of swan lakes and beautiful doves taking leap to the unknown heavens, clouds, and skies with free, open wings; and boundless to the world beneath thee. A skip to your chest, admiring his facial features—the vague dimples wrinkle his lips and stupid, horrendously stupid, smile. Divine mahogany eyes in the corners of an almond-shape and a few cute baby hairs hang behind those pine-shaded bangs. Dazai softly gestures yourself nearer to him, step on the higher platforms of his room, no matter of what status you are, maybe Dazai spoke quietly. Or forgot to use the mouth. The brunet-haired noble examines the physique of that body of yours and fondly admires your face, even though covered and hidden under all of that makeup, he manages to crack a small smirk. "Forgive me, but... Ah, you're... As beautiful as up close."

It's cost him an expense of his whole sense to control his nerves and desire to have you on his lap, held lovingly—darling—precious. Importantly, as embracing your beloved form to his closely as humanely possible. If you're ingenuous in allowing that off the bat... How shameless of him. "Ah, you must be humbling me, my lord. I don't deserve such remarks so early." Gently, you exclaim. Twist the fan to your liking and cover your mouth of kind elegance and timid meekness. By the celestial Gods above, he's head struck although you didn't start seducing the noble with your pretty long lashes... Dear, it stole the time to apply too! Infatuating. That's less time trying to appear loving to him, sure. Well...

It's hard to be doubtful that he does look to love you in those starry eyes and blunt browns. Even harder to imply whether or not if this factor relies importance.... Keeping close to.

"Oh but I am usually quite certain as to what I say whenever, lovely Jun'ai-chan. So to speak... I don't intend to be harsh." Dazai puts to rest his smoking pipe. Cast away soon after picking it up...

"Spare me a good time and listen, I beg, my dear Jun'ai-chan. I am absolutely certain that this must be the most abnormal thing you'll hear today—or ever—throughout your entire lifetime; yet I cannot be held back. Albeit the humble nature resides me, nanakorobi yaoki." Dazai offers his hand, and so you've placed yours in return soon after Dazai reaches to you. "...Since the parade weeks ago sitting adrift by spring's exposition, you've caught these eyes for yourself." Dazai starts. "I—I can't be helped, guilty as charged! But in its climax, I have hurried my legs to the brothel where you used to live. Then... Respectfully having you became a sort of necessity in my brain."

Who's to guess that this fine, handsome young noble is indeed this selfish—greedy?

Then again, who are you to reflect so hasty? Oh, no. How exactly must you put it with him? "What pleasure." You exclaim, feign shock. "In all truthfulness, I'm much more relieved in hearing those kinds of words from you at the moment..." ...And just what are you thinking?! Saying it dilly-dally won't save you from anything. "I'm not disapproving your ways, Dazai-dono. Matter of fact, I appreciate it." He completes a soft-spoken grin that's both boyish and ugly. Ugly in a way that's good-natured, and whole. Akin to the luminous burning sun which lasts eternal and hurts your eyes... Let us become a bit realistic here:

Dazai's hand takes the kettle of refreshing green tea into his hands then proceed to serve you a cup—along a charming smile. "What a merciful woman you are. I hadn't had a message that you were going to be a forgiving type... Well, shall I cherish upon wondrous setting beneath fallen sakura petals of early bloom; and pray to beloved heavens above—with a drenched heart—must it not go soon."

"A heart for poetry?" It's the first you've taken akin to catch on about Dazai.

A couplet, kind of freeform in a sense amidst those twin lines the noble recited with grace and honour.

"Indeed, belladonna. Let me ask you... As it soothes the soul countless of times, how can one not be compromised into the elegance, intricate, and exquisite lines?" To the rhythm of his voice, endear and charming, he takes a pen between two fingers and strokes across a random bit of paper next to Dazai in idle. "What touching words. I much agree." Was all you managed to reply. His writing was neat, written the kanji for what seems to read 'peafowl.' You felt flustered over closely admiring his movements, notably Dazai's fingers. "May we perform poems until the rising sun meets dew grass and kiss the windows clear?"

You weren't expecting your mouth to speak for itself. You only thought of so as light rain drips slowly and comes to a close. It's presumably the late night by now, time flew.

The young noble smiles with such tender elation at the suggestion at hand between him and you. "It'd be ill-mannered for me to decline, no?" He paints a small portrait of himself, modest, he is more than thrilled at your words, isn't he? Although it was basic splats of ink on paper arranged in a way of ornamental flowers Dazai admired his eyes to.

...Maybe you were being a little too arrogant about him.

𝐭𝐚𝐠𝐥𝐢𝐬𝐭.

@wasdy-san, @inojuuy, @imkwikly, @nonexistence1199, @emyyy007, @coilai, @writingandmusing, @hypocritic-trash-baby

[altaiiriss]

Repost from Trans Chuuya week 2024

Day 3 — Gender euphoria

(This is a sequel to day 1; it can be read as a standalone but I suggest reading that one first!)

"Oh my—"

Dazai almost freezes as he steps into the kitchen.

The first thing he sees in the morning—

"Why is Chuuya wearing my shirt?" he asks, utterly dumbfounded.

Chuuya smirks. "Like what you see?"

"You didn't answer my question." Dazai chastises, taking a few steps towards the redhead as if he can't escape his magnetic pull.

"Nothing serious. Helps with the dysphoria."

A barely audible 'oh' escapes Dazai's lips as his eyes stare at his partner.

It's quite impossible to make out his silhouette through the shirt, for it is ridiculously bigger than Chuuya's regular clothes. He looks completely relaxed—a sharp contrast to the previous day where he could barely stare at his reflection in the mirror.

He looks—

"Handsome." Dazai mumbles before he can even form a coherent thought, his mouth clearly acting faster than his reasoning.

Chuuya's face suddenly heats up, cheeks flushing a lovely shade of red. Will he ever stop blushing at simple compliments?

"Shut up." he protests, heart pounding in his chest at the speed of light. "Go grab some clothes. We're going to that French bakery."

Dazai swallows. Chuuya declined the same offer less than 24 hours ago, terror settling in his stomach at the thought of being perceived the wrong way.

Today's different—Chuuya looks so confident and at ease that Dazai wishes he could freeze this moment and let Chuuya experience this happiness in eternal.

Damn, he would model Chuuya's body with his own hands like a sculptor if he could, if it meant the redhead wouldn't be at war with himself anymore.

When they enter the bakery a hour later, Dazai's brain is still processing the fact that Chuuya found a way to style his button up shirt into an actual outfit, despite the obvious wrong size.

A stylish slug, dare he say.

"A café au lait," the waitress repeats Dazai's order as she writes it down, then she glances at Chuuya. "What can I get you, sir?"

"A black coffee with extra ice, thanks." he replies, offering the lady a warm smile.

"Someone's in a good mood today, uh?" Dazai points out as soon as the waitress leaves, smiling in return.

"Shut up." Chuuya retorts, as if he's ashamed of his own happiness.

He's so silly, Dazai thinks.

"I can hear the slug thinking." Dazai observes. Reading Chuuya like a book is a familiar language that has been carved into his bones long ago. "Feeling good won't kill you, you know."

Someone suddenly approaches them before Chuuya is given the chance to reply.

"Uhm, sorry to interrupt," a young teenager mutters, unsure, and their gaze promptly lands on Chuuya, "May I ask you how to dress like this?"

"Like this?" Chuuya echoes back, brows furrowed.

"Like an elegant man."

"This elegant man is taken." Dazai chimes in, grabbing Chuuya's hand in a rather possessive manner.

"Oh god Dazai, why do you feel threatened by a literal kid," Chuuya groans, then smiles back at them. "What do you want to know exactly?"

The young kid, who is most likely around 16 years old, nervously plays with their hair. Both Dazai and Chuuya struggle to understand why they are so tense.

"I want to look like a boy too," they mumble quietly, as if they're afraid to admit it out loud, "I don't feel like a girl."

"Oh." Chuuya gasps, positively surprised. "You're like me."

"I'm like you?"

"I wanted to look like a boy too—I am a boy because I've never felt like I was girl."

The young boy nods, eyes shining with newfound joy. "I finally found someone like me."

Chuuya's breath gets stuck in his throat. It's like speaking to a younger version of himself, a teenager Chuuya who never shared his feelings with anyone until the Flags took him with them.

'The Flags got two trans boys now!' Albatross had said, and Chuuya had finally found a word that described that feeling he had been experiencing since forever.

"Yeah, we're alike, kiddo." Chuuya agrees, a warm feeling blooming in his chest.

"You two go have a chat now," Dazai, ever the mastermind, states cheerfully as he gets up, his seat now empty. "I'll be waiting outside."

Chuuya only comes out of the bakery one hour later.

"Well, it's time for us to head ho—" Dazai stops as he notices Chuuya's cheeks getting wetter. "Oh no, the slug is producing slug juices." Dazai sighs with faux annoyance and grabs Chuuya until he's burying him in his chest.

"I'm going to stain your shirt with my makeup." Chuuya mutters, heaving a shaky breath.

"It's going to be our washing machine's business."

"I'm not sad by the way," Chuuya clarifies, sniffing quietly. "Just overwhelmed."

"Chuuya stood up for himself inside that café as well, didn't he?"

"Yeah. It felt good. To be able to help someone just by being myself, I mean."

"Chuuya is always himself, on both good and bad days." Dazai murmurs, carding his fingers through red curls. "He doesn't stop being Chuuya when he struggles with himself. It's still you, always."

Chuuya tries to clean his face with the palm of his hands and Dazai does the same, brushing his thumb across Chuuya's reddened cheeks.

It takes some hugs and unfunny jokes for Chuuya to properly calm down, but in the end his heartbeat slows down and his mind is clearer.

"You know, he also asked me how to find a partner. Because of all the prejudice and stuff." Chuuya begins, breaking the comforting silence that previously settled between them.

"And what did you say?"

"That my partner is so pathetic and down bad that he never cared about it." he grins, and now Dazai knows Chuuya is back to his usual self. "And that while relationships with other trans people surely are more fulfilling, cis people can be respectful as well."

"What I'm hearing is Chuuya thinks our relationship is fulfilling ~"

"There are some exceptions to that rule. You are one of them."

Chuuya holds him close, his actions definitely not matching his words, and Dazai smirks like the annoying devil he is.

"You like me anyway."

"Sure grandma, let's take you to bed."

Dazai slides his arm around Chuuya's waist, keeping him close until they're basically glued to each other. While yesterday it felt wrong for Chuuya to be held—as if Dazai was touching something that should not exist—living in his skin is fine today.

He is able to look at himself confidently, fully aware that his body does not define him and that soft curves and a smaller body don't take away his identity.

Regardless of gender, he's still Chuuya and that's what matters the most.

[idkhoworwhytell]

The old , the new and the remembered.

The old, the new, and the remembered 

This is many to be set up as if this was firsts journal , the ‘’ are intentional and is meant to respresent firsts thoughts.

i do feel as this was rushed but its good ending for me to get something out. 

for context, this is first (the hero in the manga in the hyrule hisotra’’) i think first and sky, have a family relation ship.  They act father/son but its really like grandpa/ grandson sky knew first when he was young (for this fic first never died but lived very secluded from other hylains) first was a mentor to the other links, (think guide reader, i really need to find the person who made that au beucase for some reason I can’t) like a voice in their heads/ also a lot like shade. Just not wolf from , but appeared in dreams and helped them train. 

Just over 1k words!

theres a group of boys I’ve awaken too. 

I’ve been awakened to be in what seems to be a chamber of safe keeping?

Looking behind me I can see the crystal I just awoke from. If you looked closer you could see the  desperation in my  eyes to go back to my  respective relam. It wasn’t an oddity to be in an era that wasn’t my own.  The voice inside the sword I once wielded, now on the boy's back whispered in my head “it's the heroes of the wilds”. 

the Boys/Men? Are looking at me in awe. Which is odd because literally I am just my underwear at this given moment in time.

i hear the one with the white cape say,

”the first hero” 

Now , I know I knew these boys in front of me, I was their mentor of course. But am i going to tell them just yet? No, I am not.

” Pardon for waking you, but we have been sent on a quest  to find you to help us dearest our enmeny. Apparently you have  a connection with the master sword, yes?

I could feel the elder  one stare at me as I rose to stand. ‘Why in the world are they staring? They have seen scars before!’ 

”That's right. But let me assume. Your names are all link correct?’”

“Yes, hero’s across time , brought together to fight an evil.”

‘Why would this evil need 10 hero’s?’ I defeated demise on my own and I helped these boys too! Shouldn’t be that hard. ‘Best not to get cocky, might be a tough one’

there was a young boy in that crowd, hero of the winds as I recall, the poor boy looked at me with tears in his eyes. But as much as I wanted to comfort the boy, I was currently being faced off by the one with my old friend's markings  on his face.  ‘Ferice long time no see bud’ I could hear the hum form the mask on the man's hip as I spoke in my mind, some form of telepathy we’ve always shared.

By this time after this mans talk about destroying some evil being (lizard i think? Idk I’ve beaten too many things for this.) 

 i simply don't have the patience to write his whole talk in this journal , i think i'll run out of pages!  As he talked, I dressed myself. I could hear a collective gasp as I wrapped a red scarf around my neck. Seemed to be similar to their supposed captain I think.

”So will you come with us?” Oh I forgot he needed my compliance for this .

“I'd be more than willing to help, this beast needs some help staying dead. Plus what’s one more adventure.” 

I was holding out my hand to shake but it went unrequited.

The white cape from earlier had stepped up to hand me my previous sword it seemed. It looked as if its been through it.  

“ hold it, it’ll  give us your moniker.” 

But to their surprise, the moment I held it, my beloved fi flew out. 

‘Why are so many people crying today’ i think as i see the skyloftian as I’ve been told, have welling in his eyes.

Of course, after she flys out I hear the voice again.

”Master,  First. Is the name you carry .”

Some of the Boys looked frozen, one looked like he was in a trance. ‘Memory id suppose.’

the one in the wolf pelt was by his side right away. Kinda like an older brother. ‘Reminds me of someone’

And before the skyloftain could say anything. She was right back in the sword I held in my arms. 

 “ Look, I know I just met you but how in the world did you get her out the sword!”

This boy looks  a lot like me. just shorter ‘atleast he got some of my good genes.” ’old friend. She wasn’t in the sword when I weiled it. It was separate. Maybe I bought something from it?”

”but, for right now that aside I believe introductions are in order”

huh. I see a lot of myself in these boys.

i see my desire for collecting and my number of adventures in legend, of course my love for arson in wild ‘ I can tell by just looking at this kid cause just look at him!’ This twilight kid reminds me a lot like my child and teenage years. Working on a ranch and farm , huh seems to be a trait passed down. The tiredness in times eye(s) ‘ that’s a dangerous blind spot can’t see what going on to the left of you!’

Some of the boys looked like they were raised near the castle. The captain seemed to be stuck acting as if he was on castle grounds can’t blame the kid  i was that way for a while the veteran’ seemed like he knew how to appease the nobles, play his cards  right get them off his back. Now wild, is a wild card. He doesn't remember much he says, but from what  I can see he wasn’t happy when he was a knight, not even as the princess guard’ I like this version of him, not the boy i knew before and was silent not matter who he was around . I'm going to start my travels with these boys. But for now I am waiting for the chaos to unfold when they remember who  i am to them.

[fallenclan]

so!! starting off to say Moon 263 [part 2] might be one of my favorite fallenclan updates ever. here are some more specific thoughts because i have A Lot

the first panel with the "not actually chosen" ones chatting is so nice. the colors for this update are so tasty and really have a mystical vibe, but i especially like this first panel with the mushrooms. also, the textboxes look so neat overlapping. i like how wolfbite is quieter and not saying much while feathersight is speaking the most. it can be inferred that he's explaining about how starclan/the glowcave usually works with darkstone and honeysong occasionally adding on, and at the end wolfbite is just like "all right guys, i get it."

the way the starclan cats are drawn is so cool... the "fading" effect that makes them look all watery, as if bits and pieces of them are drifting away?? incredible. i love it! i also really like how the stc textboxes are a different shade. it's just a neat detail. the star effects surrounding them is so pretty also. i just love how you draw the starclan cats in general, they look so magical. i like how away from the glowcave, their colors bleed past the lines, but at the glowcave they appear more solid, as if they're stronger there. i just,, i love it

the cameos! omg. i literally never thought i would see nick again but here we are. i'm a big fan of all the appearances!!

silverbelly is adorable. i love how excited feathersight is to see her. also, when she first appears, i like the detail of darkstone sweating. despite being a medicine cat, he's literally never seen a fully formed starclan cat before. he's nervous!! wolfbite looks shocked but i feel like this is more about the idea of her being "special" rather than seeing silverbelly tbh. she's like "damn i guess i actually am plot relevant."

salmonskip... i was so happy to see her... she's such a goober. nick's "we all had our own cats we hoped would come" was such a fun line as well for its thought provoking effect. i feel like it's a nod to how there were so many different "fourth cat" theories in the discord server but i could be wrong. we all had our ideas! now i'm super curious as to who nick was rooting for... and also who each of the previous leaders wanted (should i send another ask with my theories on who specific starclan cats wanted to be the fourth cat?)

big fan of the "you weren't actually chosen, you chose yourself" yada yada. wonderful! i love choosing your own destiny narratives. i'm sure nothing bad will happen to our little feline heroes

sleepycloud :(

"you sound different than i thought you would" - honeysong, had me in shambles. honeysong is older than lionsong was when he died... he looks so young here

poppyfeather made me laugh. i love the "not that this isn't heartwarming..." that i read in a 100% sarcastic tone. she is not in the mood for happy reunions!! she has a dictator to depose, guys. time to see her vengeful trait come into effect...

the ending! darkstone and honeysong look so envigorated whereas feathersight looks exhausted and wolfbite... looks ready to "do what has to be done." i love how happy she was to see sandsnap, and then how her happiness is buried once the poppyfeather and cherrystar step in with their plan, as if seeing sandsnap only strengthened her desire for revenge.

i had a dream after this post where the squad was about to confront ravenstar and he was all like "you thought i didn't know about your little schemes? cute." and his little gang rolled up (sleepydawn, flamefall, levi, patchback, etc.). i don't remember much else of what happened but i woke up like " oh no . . . the little guys are in danger . . . " anyway this segues into my prediction that there will be at least one death as a direct consequence of their attempt to depose ravenstar.

-🐉 (giggling and swinging my feet)

as always dragon... you literally never miss

i'm so glad you picked up on the textbox thing, you basically got it in one!!! feathersight and honeysong explaining helpfully, darkstone chiming in with his little snips and jokes, wolfbite talking less because she's got somewhat of a listening role there etc

IT WAS SO FUN TO DRAW THEM LIKE THAT... the white lines made it kind of difficult to see the white cats (looking at you sleepycloud) but otherwise. so fun. your assumption is correct, they're more solid there than they are as ghosts, and then in Starclan they arent wispy at all, just faintly glowing with those white lines (though they're so fun to draw like this i might have to just draw the ghosts like this always. idk)

cameos!! Nick was a special request from my sibling that I agreed with wholeheartedly. he was so silly

"damn I guess I actually am plot relevant" LMAO

yup it was a nod to all the guesses!! if i had infinite time and energy i would have put in more starclan cats as nods to specific guesses (Canarywish aka the greatest red herring I ever fished comes to mind), but alas. and you KNOW id love to hear all your thoughts fuck yes!!! (I didn't have anyone in particular in mind for Nick, but if I had to choose I'd say he was hoping for Snailpetal as well, she's his only surviving descendant)

i'm sure nothing will happen ! nothing bad at all!

sleepycloud :( indeed. i will let slip that i've got some plans as far as the sleepydawn situation but that's all i'll say about that for now

SHES ALMOST TWICE THE AGE HE WAS WHEN HE DIED... i always forget how young Lionsong was. not even 30 moons :(

i love Poppyfeather she is ALL business. "listen you guys can come back to the glow cave literally any time after we kill ravenstar's bitch ass can we get on with it pls"

YES EXACTLY!! Honeysong and Darkstone are the Young Optimistic ones, Feathersight is very cautiously optimistic but has seen a lot of shit and is more realistic about the odds they're facing, Wolfbite is in Get Shit Done mode. she's locked in. her thirst for blood has died down a bit upon seeing her dad and now it is HER job to save her clan. weight of the world on this poor girl's shoulders

i'm sure there will be no consequences. dont worry

[2knightt]

Howdy knight in shimmering armor!! :DDD it is moi~ & I come humbly presenting my req ✨🥹

So. 👏🏼 We've heard of motherly!reader, right? And we got motherly!reader. We've heard of sister!reader, and we got sister!reader.

Now get ready forrrrr *🥁🥁🥁* daughter!reader! 🩷💫

can I get some hcs for our Sodapop with a daughter/daughter!reader? I feel like he'd be such a sweet and loving parent aaaa 😭😭 whether biological or adopted it's entirely up to you, darlin'! I just live for the sweet fluff; my brain is stuck on Darry and Pony and the rest of the Greasers as uncles akshdj it's driving me up a walllllll.

uncle/godfather (!!! 😱😭🩷) Steve—maybe her taking an interest in cars or working at the DX when she gets older?? or not and somethin' else has her best interests at heart!! but everybody loves and dotes on her endlessly still bc she's their princess UGH the potential is insanity.

Work your magic, firefly!! If it's what'chur into, I'd love to see whatcha got for me! 😚 If not, then don't worry a thing at all, m'kay? <33 Entirely up to you!

↳tell the angels no!₊˚✧

➬ sodapop curtis x daughter!reader

a/n; THERES MY FAVOURITE PERSON EVERRR!!! HIIIIII!!!! ALSO I MADE READER LIKE IN THE RANGE OF A PRETEEN..BUT I MADE IT PRETTY VAGUE ON THE AGE..SAUR.

you’re sodapop’s biological child, and he couldn’t be happier omfg.

he’s such a good dad :(.

he legit can’t say no to you so you can get away with literally anything.

you punch a kid because they were annoying you?

“aw, it’s okay. i bet she didn’t mean it.”

“your daughter punched the child 3 times in a row.”

“just like i taught her!”

you get caught stealing?

“just ask for money! or take some from uncle steve.”

if you ever tell him you have a crush on a kid, he’s telling everyone. shouting it in the streets fr.

“who is he? is he cute? is he nice? rich?”

“papa!!”

and if the gang finds out?? good luck.

“what? you’re way too young to even to be thinking about boys!”

“yeah, what uncle two-bit said!”

“guys she’s a child. let her explore.”

“shut up ponyboy, this is y/n we’re talking about.”

do NOT ask sodapop for help with any of your work.

as soon as your done with adding, it’s ponyboys problem.

each person in the gang probably has their own job or role in your life.

johnny is the uncle you go to for peace and quiet.

“johnny-uhh…let’s go to the lot!! i’m tired of this house.”

“alright, kiddo. go tell your dad where you’re going.”

johnny’s jealous that you have a better childhood than he ever had, but he’s happy that it’s you getting the best childhood you can possibly get.

ponyboy’s the one you go to for academic help, or just..help in general.

“uncle pony, what’s 12 x 2?”

“what’s 12 + 12?”

“24?”

“there’s your answer.”

two-bits the uncle you go to when you’ve had a bad day. he does ANYTHING to make you laugh.

he’ll tell you any story about anyone to make you smile with tears still in your eyes.

“w-well what about dad?”

“OH! your dad used to work at this gas station, the DX, right? and one day a guy came in to rob the place, grabbed the drinks, chocolate bars, everything and just RAN! so your father ran after him but he tripped and took the guy down with him! i swear he was the same shade as a tomato when the story came out!”

“really?”

you asked, in between laughs.

steves the uncle you go to for…literally everything.

you’re probably his favourite person so…he’s ‘round you a lot.

“uncle steve, i’m trying to go to school!”

“schools for losers.”

“uncle?!”

“but don’t drop out. drop out and i kill ya.”

darry is the one you go to for actual advice and a shoulder to lean on.

you probably call him grandpa for the laughs.

“an-and i just don’t know what to do, pa! it’s so..UGH!”

“just breath, y/n. you’re a strong young girl. you can make it, like you always do.”

dallas is the uncle you go to for actual fun.

he let’s you get away with anything and everything.

he might even be worse than your dad.

“can i have a cigarette?”

“just don’t tell anyone, kay? i ain’t tryna get the tar beatin’ outta me.”

i like to think that steve’s car work was acknowledged and he moved into a better paying job.

so if you show the slightest bit of interest into cars, he’s bringing you into work on the weekends.

“pop the hood, y/n.”

“sir yes sir!”

they’d be so loving but so annoying with you omfg.

they will barge into your room without asking.

“HEY Y/N!”

“TWO-BIT, WHAT DO YOU WANT?!”

“that’s no way to talk to your uncle.”

“so?? get out! i’m trying to play something.”

they all come into your room and drag you out to the dingo.

OMFG IMAGINE THEM PICKING YOU UP FOR SCHOOL IT’D BE SO EMBARRASSING.

sodapops driving, it’s his car, two-bit and steve are fighting across the seats, johnny and ponyboy and talking over the shouting, dallas is blasting music while darry tells everyone to behave.

all that while you stand infront of school, infront of everyone, as they shout your name out loud.

“Y/N!”

“Y/N GET IN!”

“HURRY UP PLEASE”

“i don’t know who these guys are…must be another y/n.”

“Y/N CURTIS. GET IN HERE NOW!”

“ah, shit.”

“WHAT WAS THAT, YOUNG LADY?”

“nothinguhh!!”

10/10 experience overall, would sell my first born to experience this.

may 27th, 2023. 4:41PM.

[edwin-paynes-bowtie]

lore drop gimme

Okay so when I was in undergrad I went on a date with a 28 year old woman. I'll call her K for the purposes of this story. I was 19-20(F) and worried that I would be too young for her and that we would have a maturity gap that left us with little in common.

K picked me up from my apartment and immediately things were a little weird. I knew her from my classes, but she started talking about yaoi within 5 minutes of getting in the car. I was like, fine, I don't mind yaoi. Sure.

We get to the Barnes and Noble for our date. Things fall apart fast.

She points out 50 Shades. I say "lol 50 Shades of Shit." She gets really angry and tells me it's her favourite book and Christian Gray is a hero. I'm 99.9% sure he stalks his love interest and coerces her into BDSM, so I'm a little disturbed by her continued adamancy that he's a hero. She stamps her foot. I drop it because I don't really care.

I quietly sit there watching her go through the yaoi for like 20 minutes. Then I tell her I'm going to look around and come back. I do. I get a couple of books and walk back to the yaoi. She's been there for about 40 minutes.

I have fainting spells and immediately start to feel one come on. I tell her I want to go to dinner as planned. Our exchange was as follows (possible paraphrasing because this was almost a decade ago):

Me: I feel faint and would like to go to [restaurant] soon. Maybe we could finish up and head out within the next 10 minutes or so? K: Oh my GOD. OH MY GOD. I have a better idea. Let's go to the cafe! They have cookies! Me: No, I want real food with, like, protein. K: COOKIES FOR DINNER! It's everyone's dream come true! Me: Maybe when I was like, 10? But anyway I feel like we should go soon, so... K: I can't believe you don't want to fulfill this literal dream with me, but okay.

We check out. In the line, she sees a little polar bear plush in a box that says ADOPT ME. She picks it up and tells me that she had to buy them all at another Barnes and Noble because "they needed to be adopted and it was sad."

She tells me that we should order a pizza one day next time we have a date. I'm like, uh huh. She's like, "OH! But we should wait until we move back in with my mom, because then she can order the pizza for us while we sit in the basement and watch anime without interruptions. :)"

We start to go to the car. I'm faint and at this point know there will not be a second date. I tell her we could just drop me off. Screw the restaurant, I have food at home.

She takes me to the restaurant anyway. I do not want to be there, but besides that we actually have a nice-ish dinner up until the end. At some point I mention I have a crackling candle from Yankee Candle in my room. After dinner:

K: I want to go to Yankee Candle. Me: I don't think that's something we need to do right now. K: I want to see the CRACKLING CANDLES. Me: Okay, well, I think it's closed. K: (Actual pouting face)

We drive home. Thank God. We're sitting there silently in the car while she drives and I sit in the passenger seat.

I want to stress this is a silent drive. I am clearly no longer vibing the date. Like, I am being openly anti-date. She turns to me and BREAKS THE SILENCE with:

K: Did you know that men can break their penises? Me: Um... what? K: I was thinking... Me: K: I said I was THINKING... Me: K: I was thinking. If a gay man broke his penis, would he have to become a bottom forever?

I said literally nothing until we got home. I was speechless.

When it was time to get out of the car, she had child-locked me in. She began to jump up and down and tell me that she WANTED TO SEE THE CRACKLING CANDLE.

She would not un-child-lock me until I agreed, very snappishly, that she could "come up, see the crackling candle, and leave." I stressed that this was NOT a euphemism as well.

She comes up. I show her the candle and start ushering her out the door.

She starts talking to my hippie-dippie Republican hippie conspiracy theorist roommate who I hate. This roommate is very homophobic and asked one of my future girlfriends if she was going to shock therapy. She thought demons came into the apartment through the lights and filled it with angel statues. She had a cat that she disciplined by spanking over her knee who she also refused to spay. She thought milk was made when humans fucked cows.

Anyway, the roommate and K somehow HIT IT THE FUCK OFF.

I went back to my room seething. I came out about 3 hours later, thinking K left. K is sitting on the floor playing video games with my roommate

On Valentine's day, months later, I had not spoken to her since the date. She walks up to me and presents me with a MASSIVE plastic heart necklace from Clare's

[puffyducks]

DCRC Week #8 (Part 1)

ODIN WEEK! ODIN WEEK! ODIN WEEK!!! It's PKNA #5: Portrait of the Hero as a Young Duck btw. Please enjoy my epic edit- I mean real panel I mean totally real screenshotted and unedited comic panel.

Also, I try to put spoilers for the comics I'm reading about as they happen in the story, but this time I couldn't help myself so beware of reading this if you haven't read the whole chapter yet.

I already have this panel saved in my folder, it's so iconic in my head. He wanna be Batman sooooo bad.

Gotta love these military guys opening fire like their lives depend on it and PK is just behind them making silly little jokes like :D

Wow this guy seems interesting I wonder what his opinions on AI art are

Gorgeous panel and some gorgeous one-point perspective here. Sorry for being an art student but we made a lot of drawings like this and it made me learn that drawing buildings makes me want to die. So this is even more impressive to me in that regard.

Lowkey cute asf for Odin to just put a whimsical little garden in place of where Ducklair tower used to be

Donald is so SAD it breaka my heart 💔 RIP Uno who is totally super dead 💔💔💔

Donald is SO SMALL. Shoutout to the PKNA writers for pushing the entire main Duckverse cast to the side so that they could create an all-new roster of characters that all fucking TOWER over Donald in height. Lyla, Angus, Xadhoom, Styvesant, soon to be Odin in like a few pages. If you need to know anything it's that Paperinik is a little SHRIMP and he is so tiny and small and the most specialest boy ever.

haha..... yeah..................

DEFEND UNO'S LEGACY DONALD!!!!! Also Lyla... okay and I guess Geena cause she's the ACTUAL robot he's defending-

This is the part where I look at the camera like it's an episode of The Office btw. If you know you know.

babygirl

OOOOH SHIT IT'S YA BOI!!! I forgot about him trying to meet Donald by just slamming his ship into theirs. Like I GUESS that's a surefire method to speak to someone...

Cheeky son of a-

GEENA YOU FUCKING NARC

Snitches get stitches Geena... (imagine a little text pops up on screen like in a video game and says "Geena will remember that")

Hmmmm where have I seen this shot before.... *flashback to issue #0.1 which I put a filter over to make sure you know it's a flashback to an earlier chapter*

oh right.

Crying over this shot they BOTH wanna be Batman man 😭 two dumdums that were made for each other

He's so cheeky I hate him (affectionate)

So obviously they bring up that Odin just means "One" (or Uno) but it's also worth pointing out what an Eidolon is. Eidolon is a Greek term, meaning "a spirit-image of a living or dead person; a shade or phantom look-alike of the human form" (at least according to Wikipedia).

"ODIN EIDOLON" LITERALLY TRANSLATES TO "UNO'S GHOST" I FUCKING HATE HIM. I'M SMASHING HIM WITH HAMMERS. AFFECTIONATELY.

Anyways to wrap up with some final thoughts-

Something that doesn't really get addressed in this comic (probably for plot reasons, it's not super relevant) is just how comforting it must be for Donald to travel to the future and see that the Evronian Empire is all but wiped out, a shell of its former self. Obviously timelines can still change, we saw that in Day of the Cold Sun, but it still must be nice to see that all the fighting he does is going to pay off in a big way.

Btw remember that bit in an earlier chapter about Uno finding Lyla attractive? Yeah well I should think so considering that YOU'RE THE ONE THAT BUILT HER- Okay well he's not the DESIGNER but still I think that connection is funny ok. I wonder if Uno scanned Odin's gun and was like "oh"

I like this comic, I think it's another really good one. I mean it's no Earthquake but still, between Day of the Cold Sun, Earthquake, and then this volume I feel like we've just had banger after banger after banger. I'm also super stoked to have Odin in the story now, even if thinking about Uno way outliving Donald and being excited to see him again after 200 years makes me really depressed if I think about it too hard. I'm happy that he got to escape the confines of Ducklair tower and even got a cunty green suit in the process though, good for him. Donald is REALLY gonna regret not accepting that explanation from Uno though, RIP 🙏 SUUURELY he'll figure it out one of these days guys. Like EVENTUALLY. Right???

[nikist-4-n]

im an adult and i wanted to give you some piece of advice that maybe youve picked on while whatever drama was happening to you, let this be a lesson that you dont join a groupchat or make online friends again, these situations can build up frustration and guilt on a kid and this whole "slur, no slur" thing is absolutely one of the most ridiculous things ive ever heard of. tiring yourself out by sending anons to another girl youve fought with is highly immature and i dontmean this with harmful intent, its normal to not act aware or be developed at a young age, however, if you were as innocent as you claim (this goes to both parties) , seriously its best to get off the internet OR, keep making your moodboards, but no matter how annoying an ask or hater can be- dont care. dont mind them. its part of growth, have a calm day and i hope you learn from this. youll really regret making online deep connections and attachments when you are in my place now, looking into these creators who you used to be moots with from an old account who seemed like a cute friendgroup that now are acting just like middle school girls and that uncomforting feeling of "oh i wish they knew what i know, for they wouldnt be here fighting and getting balls deep into their feelings about these friendships". 🙋‍♀️

( Sorry this took so long but I'm done )

1. I'm an adult and i wanted to give you some piece of advice that maybe youve picked on while whatever drama was happening to you, let this be a lesson that you dont join a groupchat or make online friends again, these situations can build up frustration and guilt on a kid

Well adult anon I do have nice online friends which I have made so I can't say I'll completely not make any new ones but I'll definitely never involve myself into them again. And u are right this does build up frustrations and guilt cuz I regret my actions and I have apologized multiple times and the frustration I feel is cuz I listened to the other part attentively but all I have received are people in my comments defending their actions ( while the people involved are quiet )

2 and this whole "slur, no slur" thing is absolutely one of the most ridiculous things ive ever heard of.

It absolutely is ridiculous cuz we sorted and talked it out a week ago but Saraah brought it back up to switch up the narrative and just started new drama which I to explained here . I guess she never even understood why I was upset so instead of trying to learn my view ( while I did for her ) she just started something that wasn't necessary at all.

3 tiring yourself out by sending anons to another girl youve fought with is highly immature and i dont mean this with harmful intent,

I never sent anyone an anon at all. I have tried to reach out to them but I never went that low, I literally got a rude anon myself ( here) and everyone is calling me immature while we're forgetting that Saraah brought this on Tumblr and called Lia a slur as well but NOBODY called her out on her rude behaviour and when my elder sister told Lia what she said she didn't care ( which she can feel like that) . And I have not blocked anyone while I have been blocked my MANY because I am mature enough to let them explain themselves without jumping to my own conclusions. ( no shade to anyone at all )

4 its normal to not act aware or be developed at a young age

Adult anon i feel like a lot of people don't get that. Well I, was being immature and I have apologized for my actions, I knew and took accountability publicly ( and privately ) which I haven't seen Saraah do at all ( not that I can she blocked me ) but people are STILL calling me drama filled, rude, immature ( which they can feel like that ) , etc. all while supporting the girl who started this.

5 however, if you were as innocent as you claim (this goes to both parties) seriously its best to get off the internet OR, keep making your moodboards,

Well I've never claimed to be innocent at all I've just stated my side of the story and have debunked all the misinformation around me. And I'm definitely going to take a break because this is making me stressed and I'm tired of explaining myself, those who heard me out thank you, but I'm not going to speak to u again cuz I've lost trust with you AND those who actually reached out to hear me out I am very thankful for that.

6 but no matter how annoying an ask or hater can be- dont care. dont mind them. its part of growth, have a calm day and i hope you learn from this.

Yh I will definitely. I have realised that whether I am right or wrong, some of them don't care and they just don't like me and I have accepted that.

7 youll really regret making online deep connections and attachments when you are in my place now, looking into these creators who you used to be moots with from an old account who seemed like a cute friendgroup

Well I have and will be thoroughly distancing myself from now on. And I will most definitely look back at my account and regret all of this.

8 that now are acting just like middle school girls and that uncomforting feeling of "oh i wish they knew what i know, for they wouldnt be here fighting and getting balls deep into their feelings about these friendships". 🙋‍♀️

I mean anon don't forget that ( some ) we're middle schoolers. I think it shows in our reactions. While some have apologized ( me included ), others are just immature and just want a fight and I feel like it's best we don't interact with each other from here on.

In conclusion

Overall I get what u were trying to say and I will take some of this advice 🫶

[crazykuroneko]

IWTV S2E5 Musings

Long ass note under the cut, but tl;dr Louis & Old Daniel is my new brotp. Armand can't take it away from me. And Armand has a PhD in gaslighting

• The impersonal statements Daniel pointing out. The implanted phrases Armand supposedly gave to Louis. Somehow my mind recalls the "vampire bond" explanation. The way Louis said it in S1 is like he's reading from a book.

• Current Louis knows Santiago's plotting

• Of course Armand is a lame crypto man 😭

• "His methodology is never violent" Oh, Louis

• "Armand preserves my happiness, even when I don't or can't" 🚨

• Louis still likes his coffin lined with a green silk 😭

• Young Daniel acts like a loser. I'm so sorry, I'm trying to take him seriously but he's funny lol

• "You're lonely. You're thrill seeking" Oh he reads him so bad. Why Louis stay with Armand tho?

• Louis and Young Daniel are just saying exactlyyyyy to one another lol

• Louis was agitated when Young Daniel pointed out the use of past tense on Claudia

• Louis is already in suicidal mind set even before Armand comes

• Interesting. The way Louis is reading his thoughts here. As in literal reading. He can't be in Daniel's mind (e.g. seeing what Daniel is seeing), his ability is limited to what Daniel's thinking. And Daniel is not thinking to himself, he just opens the Talamasca recordings right away. Thus Louis can only feel Hesitation from his mind, bu he doesn't know exactly what for

• "You don't have enough to fear from Paris?" On revealing their nature. I knew Louis had the man in the park an Roget. But why does this sound something bigger happened in Paris with the humans?

• "Is it the gremlin or good nurse tonight?" Well, he decided to be both tonight 💀

• "Throw pillow" "Use Claudia just to circle back to Lestat" So rich of him to shade Louis for his guilt over Claudia when he's the one who killed her.

• "It's all coming back" "Paris.." Louis forgets most of Paris?

• "She's calling me" I wonder if Louis is remembering Claudia calling him during her last moments

• No, I don't think Armand expected or waited for Louis to come into the sun like that. But he's definitely MAD because of that

• Armand is on mission to figure out what makes Young Daniel and Lestat interesting to Louis. Because Louis said he's dull

• "An instinct to self-efface" yes, both Daniel and Louis have that

• Armand kept Louis writhing in pain w/o blood for 4 days???

• Not @ Dubai Louis still giving excuses for Armand to Daniel 😭

• Armand calling Lestat. Lestat doesn't know where Louis is. Armand refuses to tell where they are.

• "You try! You were there!" Newfound friends found bickering lol

• "If you want insanity back, if you want to escape this prison of emphaty" Armand really says "Yes, I'm caging you, but you think this is bad? Well, you had it worse with him you wanna go back there??"

• Armand's tone during the coffin scene is very soft, but he's actually making himself clear he's mad MAD. Mad that Louis is trying to goad Lestat back to him again through the interview. Seeing how Louis always fast to reassure Armand with "all I said is trash" about Lestat, this is definitely an old problem to them. It makes me curious what made Louis stay with Armand post-Paris. What happened in Paris exactly? Lestat definitely knows Louis is alive and with Armand, unlike in the books. What has made him stay away? Did Louis pull a Nicki on him in Paris? Edit: wait, what if Armand reaches out to Lestat here is the equivalent of him going to NOLA in TVL and goes "news flash, Louis is actually alive. we were/are together"? Daniel doesn't hear Armand's first sentence to Lestat. and by that time, Louis does know lestat is alive but still numb 🤔 Armand mentions if Louis wants Lestat to chase him again, that's definitely about Lestat coming to Paris after the patricide.

• "All you had to do was ask" he says to the burnt Louis who is in need of his blood. A war flashback to "The silence is cruel. But you're never cruel" but in worse condition.

• Armand, making it clear he is extremely mad at Louis for trying to reach Lestat, that Louis is ungrateful cos he's been treating him better than Lestat, then dangling this channel of communication to Lestat in front of him, making Louis feels bad and coercing him to reassure him again. Armand has a PhD in gaslighting.

• The words from Armand afterwards. Louis certainly knows his answer but well, you can't answer that if you don't want Armand blowing up again.

• Armand only answers Louis back with Maitre once Louis assures him that he will stay with him.

• "I'm a bright young reporter with a point of view" Young Daniel is full of life and optimistic. Stubborn, refusing Armand's words, but they work. Then Louis came, saying it back to him, give him more words to re-find that motivation to live. Give him words to live on.

• Ngl I almost teared up to this scene with Louis and Old Daniel. They're precious as friends.

• To alter and surpress Daniel's memory, Daniel is already under a stage where he's very easy to be influenced and they give more drugs again.

• Old Daniel beeds to stay alive. I want Louis has one (1) friend that call out his and his boyfriend(s)' bullshits 😭

[dragon-kazansky]

Bridgerton shade of blue

Benedict Bridgerton x Female Reader

Benedict bumps into you, quite literally, at a ball while trying to escape his mother's attempts to find him a partner. You decide to humour him with a dance, not realising just how entwined you would become with him. It seems the universe will find every excuse to push you and Benedict together, no matter how much you fight it.

{Masterlist}

{Previous Chapter} - {Next Chapter}

Season one

Chapter Thirteen - Passionate

♡♡♡

A garden party was a nice occasion. The joys of being outdoors while socialising with dear friends had a calming and charming air about it. You found it rather pleasant being in the outdoors.

The flowers smelled wonderful, and you couldn't help making mental notes of some of the flower arrangements for, perhaps, future uses.

As you stroll, you come across the Bridgertons. You smile at Violet as you get closer, though she is talking to Eloise, who sounds less than pleased with the topic of conversation. You decide to narrowly miss this conversation for now and walk past them to where Benedict and Anthony were talking to a couple of young ladies.

Both men seem to perk up at your appearance beside them.

"Hello," you smile at the pair.

"Good afternoon," Anthony smiles back.

"Enjoying the fresh air?" Benedict asks, also smiling. Smiles all around, how joyous.

"Yes, very. This is lovely."

Anthony waves over a servant with a tray of lemonade and hands you a glass. You take it with a soft thank you, missing the look Benedict gives his brother. Anthony elects to ignore Benedict as he smiles at you again. You sip the lemonade.

The sound of someone clinking their glass to signal attention has everyone turning around to look at Colin Bridgerton.

"Can I have your attention?" He asks, looking around at everyone.

"What's he doing?" You ask quietly to the brothers beside you.

"No idea," Anthony mutters.

"I would like to make a small but important announcement," Colin declares. He is standing next to Marina Thompson. "I have happy news to impart. I have asked Miss Marina Thompson to be my wife and she has accepted."

You nearly choke on your lemonade. Benedict and Anthony look at each other. Anthony, in particular, looks less than pleased by this.

People clap around them. You clap for appearance sake, but you look up at Anthony. "Did you know?"

"No."

Anthony steps forward to talk to his mother. You can't hear what they're saying. You look up at Benedict. "I wasn't even aware your brother was courting."

"Neither was I." He says with a little shrug.

Everyone moves to go congratulate the couple. As you pass Anthony, you look up at him. He offers you his arm and you both approach Colin and Marina.

You could feel him seething behind his calm exterior.

After the party, Anthony takes Colin into his study to talk to him. You have no idea what they discuss, but you can take a pretty good guess.

♡♡♡

The next morning, you went to the Bridgerton house to see Violet. After Colin's unexpected announcement, you wanted to know all was well with the rest of the family. They were already without a sister now. They did not need to lose Colin so soon, surely.

Lady Bridgerton was most pleased to see you at her door. She told you they hadn't even started breakfast yet and invited you in. Benedict was there with the two youngest siblings. You smile at him as you enter. He smiles back softly, seemingly pleased to see you.

"Take a seat," Violet says kindly.

You sit next to Gregory, opposite Hyacinth, who sits beside Benedict. The eldest son at the table hasn't torn his gaze from you at all.

"Tea, ma'am?" The butler asks.

"Yes, please."

A cup is poured for you.

"Are you hungry?" Violet asks.

"No. I ate at home. Thank you, though." You smile at her. She returns the smile and picks up the paper in front of her. "How are you all?" You ask.

"Uh, well," Benedict nods. You smile at him.

"Violet?" You looked at her.

"Hm?" She looks up from her paper. "Oh, uh, yes." She nods, and then lowers her gaze back to the paper.

Benedict gives you a look that you understand clearly enough. His mother has been better.

"I suppose it's too soon to hear from Daphne yet?" You ask.

"I'm sure they'll have made it by now. They'll be enjoying their honeymoon period, no doubt." Benedict chuckles softly.

You smile softly and look into your teacup. "I wonder what it's like..."

"The honeymoon period?" Benedict asks, looking up at you with slightly flushed cheeks.

"Being married," you correct him.

"Oh..."

Violet looks up at you with a small smile, her eyes sparkling. "When you marry your best friend, it's the most wonderful feeling of all."

You smile at her. "I want that."

"Youshall have it. One day, dear."

You are grateful for Violet and her kindness. You've never known a more warm and welcoming woman. Your mother was nice, certainly, but she was eager just to see you wed. Violet made marriage sound magical.

You sip your tea and listen to Hyacinth bicker with Gregory over a ribbon. Benedict tries to be the middleman and solve this peacefully. You chuckle at their antics. Gregory tries to get you to defend him, but you put your hands up and explain that you weren't here when the crime was supposedly committed. Benedict also comes to your rescue.

You smile at each other.

Colin walks in.

Conversation becomes quieter. You pour yourself another cup of tea and avoid looking up at Colin. You feel like this may be a little awkward. You grab a slice of toast for the centre of the table and butter it quietly, needing to keep your hands busy.

Benedict seems to realise what you're doing and says nothing to you.

"Good morning." Colin greets his family.

"Morning, brother."

Colin nods to you, too. You offer him a smile which you then hide behind the toast you had buttered.

"Colin, your engagement is in Whistledown!" Hyacinth exclaims cheerfully.

"Hyacinth!" Eloise scolds. You hadn't even seen her lingering in the back of the room.

"What? It is!"

"Very well. Everyone out, I think." Benedict says as gently as he can.

"Yes," Violet mutters.

Benedict calls your name softly. You nod and down the rest of your tea, taking the other half of the toast with you as you rise with the others. Eloise grabs her plate and glides past you quietly.

Colin approaches his mother as you all leave the room. When the door shuts behind you, yo turn to Benedict. "Will he be alright?"

"I'll let you know after."

You follow him down the hall.

The two younger siblings follow their sister into the drawing room. Benedict reaches out his hand to grab lightly at your arm, stopping you from going any further.

"Could I... show you something?" He asks.

You look at him, brow slightly furrowed, and nod. He smiles, that crooked little smile of his and guides you down the opposite hall, leading you toward an empty room. There was minimal furniture in there, which confused as to why he brought you here.

"I like to come in here for some quiet." He explains.

He offers you a seat on one of the chairs in the middle of the room and disappears for a brief moment. You look around the room as you wait. When he returns, he's carrying something.

"I don't usually show other people my work, for, I admit, I am not happy with it, but I would like to share a piece of me with you." He says, placing the book on the table between you.

For a moment, he sits there with his hands planted firmly on top of the book and then pushes it closer to you. You reach out and take the book carefully. His hand slowly slides from the cover, and you watch him become riddled with anxiety and nerves as his passion lays slowly in your hands.

You turn your eyes to the book and gently curl your fingers around the cover, pulling it open slowly, hoping not to disturb the pages. You start from the beginning. Mere scribbles of a person. You turn the pages slowly. Different angles. Different body parts up close. Eyes, noses, hands, lips. Nearly 6 whope pages are focused on hair styles on ladies. There are pages focusing on the folds of clothes and how they hand. Particularly dresses.

You browse the sketchbook slowly and carefully, taking I never details.

There is some evidence of torn pages within the book. You wonder how many times he sketched something and torn it out with anger with displeasure.

"Well?" He asks after a long pause of silence.

You lift your eyes to meet his. "You drew all of these?"

"Yes..."

You cast your eyes on the book again, admiring a sketch of a hand up close. The long fingers, the bend in the knuckles, the lines on the palm.

"You're very talented, Benedict."

You hear the breath leave his lips and look up to see the way his eyes light up with surprise. He clearly was expecting a very different comment.

"You think so?"

"Yes." You nod. "Very."

Benedict seems to relax immensely as he looks at you and then sits back in his chair, looking relieved.

"I want to create something people will remember and talk about for years to come," he confesses. "But I cannot. I do not possess such a talent."

"Nonsense."

"No, really." He leans forward again.

"Can I ask why you decided to show me this?" You ask, looking at the open book again.

"I trust you." He speaks softly. "Are we not friends?" He asks.

"Of course."

Hs lips twitch into a smile. "I trust you," he repeats.

"Well, I'm very glad you do." You close the book and hand it back carefully. "I trust that you will create something spectacular one day."

You had no idea how much your words meant to him or for how long he would end up carrying those words with him. If you could see the artist he wants to be inside, then surely one day it shall come true. Benedict swears on his heart that anything you day could become true just because they are spoken from your lips.

He hadn't even noticed his eyes had glanced at your lips, not until his eyes met your eyes again. You don't seem to have noticed.

"I think I've taken up enough of your family's time now. I mostly wanted to check on Violet after Colin's rather abrupt proposal."

"Yes..." Benedict wasn't entirely certain what you had just said, he just agreed. His mind was reeling.

Had he really just stared at your lips without realising he was doing it. Why does he feel the urge to look at them again?

You stand before he can get the chance.

"See me out?"

He snaps back to reality and stands quickly. "Yes."

You chuckle and begin to leave the room. Benedict follows you, pretending nothing is amiss. He was confused by his own behaviour.

You assumed it was a Bridgerton trait, if nothing else.

Benedict shows you to the door, and you step outside. Your carriage awaits. You turn and smile at Benedict.

"Do not give up."

"Hm?" He looks at you confused.

"Your art. Do not give up. One day, your work will hang with the greats."

Your words set his heart fluttering. He takes a deep breath and nods, not tristing his voice. You chuckle again and bid him farewell as you walk away.

Benedict closes the door and turns slowly, looking at the empty hall of the house.

"I need a drink."

"It's barely 9," Eloise says from the open door of the drawing room.

Benedict nearly jumped out of his skin.

♡♡♡

@callmemana - @lilscast - @imgondeletedis - @benedictbridgertonss - @clownsdiehard - @wxnterwidow333

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[gasping-ghostzes]

Back on my 9-1-1 grind! So here is my little info dump of what’s going on was of the most recent episode!!!

CW: for mentions and details of suicide

1- Bobby,

This man was literally plotting his suicide this episode, or more like acting on it? But first, when he handed in his resignation, I didn’t realise it until thinking about it after the episode finished, but that was his way of preparing the 118 of his absence. Him retiring and having the LAFD be able to replace him with another captain wouldn’t be seen as suspicious especially given his age (no shade to him ❤️) but also just what he’s been thru in recent years. Like the moments of him interacting with the characters one on one and giving them little bits of unjudgmental advice and praise really kind of confirmed it. Also the part where Buck thanks him, and he’s like “it’s been my pleasure kid”, just seemed so off to me, not that it’s outside of Bobby’s character to say that, but the scene of it playing out… u could tell shit was gonna get bad

2- Hen!

I clocked it the moment I saw the lady on screen and the moment Mara and Denny was like “oh yeah, our mums r gonna adopt Mara!” And I could just tell that this lady was gonna pull her strings to stop that from happening! But also, to me, the things that was used as evidence as to why Hem and Karen shouldn’t be allowed to adopt Mara was such blatant bias. Like I know that Hen hasn’t been known to always follow the rules, but she done it with the intent and knowledge that doing it will give her patients a fighting chance, more of a chance than letting them die because she was too strict on following the rules.

3- Eddie…

So, Edmundo? Yeah he needs to go get proper help…

However, ppl saying that his love of Shanon is out of character completely, aren’t thinking about what we know about Eddie hard enough. One, he only got married to Shanon because he got her pregnant and it was advised by his church that it’s the right thing to do… but it was the same with Shanon, she was pregnant and likely had been given thw same advice. But they were both decently young when Christopher was born, so the fact that they held their religion values so close, may have been the reason they never wanted a divorce even after having a more than clear dysfunctional life. But after Shanon died, Eddie never had that option Yknow? Like when Shanon left, there was likely always a part of him that knew she’d come back around eventually because she and him both felt slightly obligated to do so, but that didn’t mean they didn’t live each other, it was just more than dysfunctional. So her death, to him was a permanent state of her never being able to come back for him and Chris to have closure and never continue the attempts of having the average family experience.

Two, Him seeing Kim, a woman who looks like his previous first love, and wanting to have some sort of relationship with her is unhealthy, but it makes sense… he’s claimed to be a “nester” and that’s what he does, so seeing a woman who looks exactly like what he envisioned as who he would “nest” with since he was young, was more than likely triggering.

Three, him never gaining that closure from Shanon and instead wanting to find it in Kim now means he’s able to live a literal delusion. One where he doesn’t exactly acknowledge that what they had was dysfunctional (ignore the word, I can’t find another to describe them accurately) and one where he can “fix” his mistakes. I think the only reason he misses Shanon and speaks of her so highly is because she was as close to a normal life he could get…

Like from what we knew about his life growing up, it definitely wasn’t the best. So him getting to fix that aspects and making sure to give Christopher better childhood. So him having this average, perfect marriage would’ve definitely been apart of him fabricating this perfect life that He, Christopher and Shanon all had is his way of coping how the majority of his life has been uncontrollable. Like Kim coming back with a new hair cut and style only made that fantasy worse. To him that’s not Kim, that’s a Shanon with the dysfunction, cause more than likely, Eddie didn’t tell Kim exactly how him and Shanon worked…

So seeing Kim as Shanon, a version of Shanon who has no “memory” of who she and Eddie were both separate and together was basically his shot at getting a second chance… which I know he isn’t gonna exactly convince himself that Kim is literally Shanon, but that’s not gonna stop him from projecting this skewed and inaccurate version of Shanon he wanted and needed in Kim

[confused-rat]

for a long while I could not figure out why LO would constantly send death threats or threats of violence and get her stans to follow along. Like that is online creator rule number one to not go after other creaters, especially if they are popular or well liked. Heck a creator from YouTube/Tiktok of the name of Casual Geographics used the community page to call out his fans for being shitty. Note , this is some one who just makes funny animal jokes, not someone who makes video essays.

I was always confused about this by a logical stand point. I don't think LO is some mastermind because if she was, she would never be reckless with what she did or said.

Untill I got my hands on a book called "Virtuous Violence : Hurting and Killing to Create , Sustain , End and Honor Social Relationships By Alan Page Fiske and Tage Shakti Rai" [Note, this book it a but outdated and annoyingly expensive book so please talke what I say with a grain of salt. Also i might explain concepts from the book poorly so sorry.]

Essentially, what the book suggests is that what if morals can be tied into the violence , instead of a lack of morals that cause the violence?

What do I mean by that? Alot of poeple know that doing things for yourself is selfish but potentially with a morality of committing violence for another , you can think that is better.

example of this happening? Look at how kids like to bully others so that they can get closer to the other kids who is helping bully another kid. Or how some one will hurt another if they hurtsd the perpetrator or someone who the victim wronged and the perpetrator.

Okay you might be thinking, how dose this tie into LO? Well notice how when LO gets talked about , the stans tend to go out of their to harass or silence critics? It's because that's thanks to LO framing herself as a victim and being very close with her fan base , LO can essentially give her fans a way to get close to her by getting then to attack other because they care. Those other hurt LO therfore you should harass others who hurt her , they deserve it anyways.

Now you might think I am contradicting myself but here me out. From what Courtney has said, things were not good when they were young so what might have happened it that when LO was young , she may have realized at some point, maybe I am just speculating, that maybe others will not hurt her is she bullies them first or gets others to go after anyone else. And maybe like her habit of habitual lying, she just keeps the behavior as she got older and never stopped, especially since it got her what she wants.

A feeling of control over others by using the fact that alot if poeple do not like her.

That does make some bit of sense, though I also want to add that I think Lily does most of what she does through the justification of “horrible people did this to me, so I can do it back”.

She’s been bullied, by awful people for sure, so she has rationalized that she can return that energy and somehow be exempt from all backlash as she was victimized first. Her followers included.

The problem is, not all of Lily’s critics are her harassers, but she refuses to differentiate the two. She wants her followers to believe her critics are the same people deadnaming her in the farms, when that just isn’t true.

Lily just cannot tolerate any form of counter-opinion or criticism being raised against her own. She is right, and anyone who says otherwise is wrong, and even if enough people tell her that she is wrong, then they are stalkers and bullies who can’t handle the truth.

She jokes about her opinions not being up to debate, lamp-shading her own stubbornness, but it’s easy to see it’s just performative self-ribbing for her fans, playing it off as a “oh that’s just Lily!” when it is quite literally the sad truth.

(The sad thing is that Lily could deal with a good 80% of her own harassment if she’d just turned anon messages off, but she refuses to. A likely indication of her own habit to send herself messages? Or is it to give herself and her fans all the justification they need to continue their own harassment campaigns? Probably a bit of both really.)