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ivesambrose · 4 months ago

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August 2024 Mini Messages 💛

1. 2. 3.

Like that Taylor Swift song right?

I intend that everyone has a good month regardless of the astrological weather.

To book a personal reading with me DM or email me at [email protected]

Services Offered

Reviews

Thanks for the tip ✨

Picture 1

You'll be diving in deep into your subconscious this month even if it means wanting to isolate from people and places for a while. Suddenly everything seems So over the top', right? And nothing and no one is phasing you anymore. This month is the first page of a big journey you're about to take so if you don't have a journal already I'd highly recommend you start logging down certain things for the purpose of accountability, gratitude, planning, manifestion, learning as well as progress. I'm letting you know, whatever you're about to do for yourself will make you stand out and you might feel a certain responsibility upon yourself as you end up inspiring others as well. You may be a person with more independent way of thinking and doing things so it'll feel strange when you end up becoming someone who leads by example. You might find yourself breaking out from a restricted environment, mindset or lifestyle. It is likely your financial situation improves as well. You might feel a bit eccentric this month with your ideas and thrist for knowledge and experiences that shape you as a person.

You might just block out the things that don't serve you and fixate on what you want deliberately. You're too engrossed in your own world and your own untouched potential to consider anything else that is eating up too much of your valuable focus. You have decided to become a version of yourself that you have chained up for long and you will become it.

Picture 2

Your entire focus and drive has shifted to your career and public image. You've decided that even if you have to go at it alone, you will gO at it alone. But this month you'l likely learn that you aren't as by yourself as you thought you have been. Be mindful of doing anything impulsive or taking on more than you can chew or over exerting your body. Some of you may also find a healthy outlet for the emotions you have been putting a lid on. You might make new friends or deepen your relationship with existing ones. There will be moments of joy and celebration too when you least expect it. Deep down you have this inner knowing that things will go smoothly or will work out if you simply have just a teeny tiny bit more faith in yourself. You might be making travel plans too that will likely take off in September. You will also be building up your confidence this month and might also be learning a new skill, taking up a hobby or language. Thing is, you will be forced to take a pause in between or simply slow down and when that happens you might wonder okay how long is this going to take? Or you might assume your progress has halted which is far from the truth, you're in for a sweet victory consider it a reward for your persistence and your mindset.

Picture 3

There's a need to go off the radar and keep certain things private to the public eye. You might feel uncomfortable and untrusting towards a lot of people maybe you're right too, some of them aren't as reliable and don't really have your best wishes at hand. You might also consider investing in something privately for yourself for future use or you might get a return on an investment you had made. A lot of you may have been dealing with resentment, grief or some kind of fear, maybe past actions of someone towards you or how you had been with them. However. you'll find clarity and make peace in regards to what you're going through. You'll overcome something that has been hovering over you like a dark cloud for months. Some of you might also be manifesting love or end up manifesting a connection that earlier felt impossible to have in your life. You may also consider making business plans this month that you will likely launch by the end of the year. You may also consider cutting chords and might feel a sense of guilt doing so, but you'll feel much lighter and you'll find love and wealth and overall mental peace flowing into your life much easier. All the weight you've been carrying is itself begging you to let go of it, it no longer has anything to serve in your life.

#free readings #tarot community #divination community #pick a card #pac #pick a picture #spiritual community #tarot readers of tumblr #monthly tarot #tarot readers #monthly tarot reading

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moonstruckme · 1 year ago

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Hi! I am absolutely in love with your writing! The way you portray our boys is just *chefs kiss*

Anywho, I was wondering if I could request poly!marauders x plus size reader? Maybe she is very confident until somebody picks on her and she starts becoming obsessed with dieting and stuff. (I'm struggling a lot with that rn) just a bunch of worry and comfort from our boys.

If you don't feel comfortable writing this or just the prompt I gave it's okay. Ily!♡

Hi, thanks for requesting my love! I'm really sorry you're struggling right now, I know how hard it can be and hope you're doing your best to take good care of yourself. You're beautiful just as you are <33

cw: size insecurity, behavior that hints at disordered eating

poly!marauders x plus size!reader ♡ 1.2k words

The worst part is, you know they weren’t even really trying to insult you.

You smiled as best you could, said your thanks politely, and moved on. Moved on outwardly, that is. Inside, the words play over and over in your head, like a song on the radio that gets worse each time you listen to it. It wasn’t that they were vicious, or particularly clever, or even wrong. It’s just, you’re not used to people commenting on your body like that.

You know you’re not skinny. So does everyone else. Neither of you typically feel the need to confer about it. Every now and again, some cruel busybody will say something, but that’s fairly easy to brush off. They’re insecure about their own looks, they have nothing better to do than fixate on strangers’ appearances, they’ve probably been on diet pills since they were twelve. You wish them well and mostly forget about it. But what’s worse is when someone comes to you with good intentions. The idea of being perceived as pitiful or wrong—really, having your physical form perceived at all—by someone who seems to want the best for you is what really hurts. That’s what makes you want to hide, to shrink yourself down until they can’t see you anymore. To become the invisible status quo.

It’s why, over the last few days, anything skintight or remotely showy has been relegated to the back of your closet in favor of things that hide your figure. Why you’ve stopped drawing attention to yourself with colorful makeup and instead started focusing on your health. Well, your health as it presents itself externally.

“Anyone else fancy a dessert?” Sirius muses as you sit reading on the couch, Remus reading the next book in the series beside you.

“Um, no,” James says, holding up a hand of cards from the game he and Sirius have been playing, “you only want to go so you don’t have to stick around and lose.”

“Whatever my other, subconscious motives may be,” Sirius says guilelessly, “I really feel like something chocolate. Don’t you, Moons?”

That’s always a safe bet. Remus looks up from his book, intrigued. “I could go for some chocolate.”

Sirius grins. “What about you, gorgeous?”

That’s usually a safe bet too. But you shouldn’t. “Thanks, but I’m still full from dinner.”

Sirius looks cheated, and Remus cocks his head at you. “Really? Didn’t seem like you ate much.” He’s not wrong. Remus had made the most incredible feta pasta, it was borderline heartbreaking to leave any on your plate. But you’re trying to practice restraint, and thankfully, James had happily taken care of your leftovers for you. “Did you have a late lunch or something?”

“Mhm.”

James looks up, eyebrows furrow bemusedly behind his glasses. “No you didn’t, angel. You said you didn’t feel like lunch after we had breakfast together, remember?”

“Oh.” You nod. So what? You’d had a late breakfast, and a decently sized dinner, and why do you really need more than two meals anyway? Who made that rule? You’re a bit hungry, but your body just needs time to adjust to your new routine. It’s used to overindulging. And nothing about today means you deserve dessert. “Right.”

Sirius wraps his fingers delicately around your ankle, smoothing a path up your shin with his palm. “Darling,” he says, and he looks distracted as he runs his fingers over the old scars on your knee, but you know him well enough to recognize when he’s keyed in, “did you eat anything today, other than breakfast and that little bit of dinner? Any snacks or anything?”

You can’t help the little rush of pride that goes through you. “No.”

Sirius doesn’t look proud. In fact, he’s frowning, as are Remus and James. You change tactics. “I’m not really hungry, though.”

“No?” Sirius' voice is unsettlingly gentle. “Why don’t you want to have dessert tonight, pretty girl?”

“Because,” you say, beginning to feel defensive (though you’re not sure of what), “I don’t need it.”

“It’s not about need, though,” James says, and why is it beginning to feel like you’re in an argument? “It’s about what you want. Do you want a little something sweet?”

“I…” Yes. The answer is yes, but do you want it more than you want to feel good about yourself? “I think what I want more is to prove to myself that I can go without it.”

Remus’ scars shift as his face scrunches in concern. “Dove,” he says, and you can’t decide if his tone is more reprimand or pity. You don’t like either option. “Where is this coming from?”

“I’m just…I’m trying something new,” you decide. “I want to lose a little weight, okay? Nothing crazy.”

“But why?” James sets down his cards, looking completely befuddled. “Angel, you’re gorgeous. You can do whatever you want, but we love you just like you are.”

“And,” Sirius adds before you can reply, “we love you most when you’re happy. I sort of thought,” he says, lowering his voice like he’s telling you a secret, “that our late-night treat runs made you happy. No?”

“They do.” You pull your legs up onto the couch, away from Sirius’ touch. “I just…I think it would make me happy to be a more normal size, too.”

Remus looks gutted. “Honey, you…it’s your body, and you should do whatever feels right for you to be healthy, but…we love you like this,” he insists, ardent. “You’re beautiful, I mean it, and I hate the idea that you might want to change for…well, for anyone other than yourself.”

You hesitate. You’re not actually sure who you’re doing this for. When had you become one of the people who want for you to be smaller so desperately? “You seriously don’t think I would look better if I were thinner?” You’ve never been one to put much stock into what any men think of your appearance, so you feel silly for asking, but you’re in a vulnerable state. And really, don’t all guys want a girl that looks like the love interests in the movies you all grew up with?

James looks you in the eye, letting you see the earnestness in his as he says, “You’re absolutely lovely, right here, right now. We wouldn’t change a thing.”

Your answering smile is oddly watery. Remus makes an awfully lovely cooing sound, leaning over to wrap an arm around your waist and paying no mind to the chub there as he pulls you into his side. “Don’t be upset, darling. You know what I bet will cheer you up?” He smiles as you look up at him questioningly, kissing between your brows. “Some chocolate. How would you feel about that?”

You let out a quiet little laugh. “Pretty good.”

“Yes!” Sirius pumps his fist in the air, already abandoning his cards and standing up. “I knew you’d come through, gorgeous. Now I think the more pressing question is, do we want chocolate pastries or chocolate ice cream?”

“Ice cream, obviously,” James says. “Before it gets so cold out we don’t feel like it.”

“Not all of us suffer from weather constraints,” Sirius argues. “I vote pastry.”

“Why would you bring ice cream up if you didn’t want it? Think long and hard, Pads. Are you going to feel like a frozen dessert when you need three layers to go outside in a few weeks?”

Remus rolls his eyes at you as you follow them out the door, letting your boys continue their bickering all the way to the store.

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toxicanonymity · 1 year ago

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when raider met sweet pea

1k words | analysis of raider!Joel x f!reader

Raider Joel Master List

This is a peek inside early, unevolved raider joel in the original fic from March. We know how much he’s grown since then, but he’s done terrible, inexcusable things, and he knows it. NOTES: You're referred to as sweet pea in this, Joel's pet name for you. General HC followed by Q&A. Thank you @milla-frenchy for always having good Qs. I have great Qs from others too that I'll get to as I can (looking at u @javier-penas-wifexx420, and others). To raider's pr team, sorry for going back in time but FIWB. WARNINGS: References to noncon, assault.

Here’s how I HC what happened under the surface: When Joel interrupted the men from taking sweet pea, it wasn't a noble rescue mission. Mainly, he was fed up with the men and wanted to put them in their place. But then, one of the men used the butt of his rifle under her chin to make her look up, and this is what unlocked or triggered something in Joel: She looked at Joel thinking he was saving her, and something in her face had a subconscious effect on him -- like he saw her hope and appreciation, and saw someone looking at him like he was a good man who mattered to them. It made him feel needed, which he hadn’t felt for so long that he didn’t even recognize the feeling, or know how to feel it, much less what to do with it.

That moment created the tiniest crack, a minuscule window into the man buried under the persona built by trauma and the apocalypse. The crack was too tiny to change his behavior yet, but that tiny window allowed him to see a glimmer of something else possible and allowed him to subconsciously connect with her in a way he hadn't connected in ages. From his raider persona, everyone is pretty 2D, so consciously, he's not seeing or treating her (or anyone) as a real person at this point. But that moment still resulted in a “spark,” like a magnetism, and the crack in his shell grows over time.

When he takes her inside: it was likely unusual that he took her somewhere private. Normally, he does things in front of the other men to show dominance (see Stash House). Subconsciously, that tiny part of him wanted to feel like a protector, and taking her somewhere private may have been his pathetic idea of a protective gesture, physically picking her up and taking her away from the worse (more violent) guys.

He takes her to the room intending for her to suck his dick by default, but I don't think P in V was always his intent: He doesn't threaten or mention fucking her upfront when he’s telling her what’s going to happen. He tells her she's gonna suck his dick and to be a good girl and it'll be over quick. While she sucks him, he decides he has to have her (be inside her). He says "alright sweet pea, now pull down your pants for me." He was acting on his primitive urges and what his body wanted in that moment for whatever reason -- he's a raider and has a huge sense of entitlement. Even though his escalation wasn’t out of malice, the effect is that he made the attack worse. He’s a bad person and a r*pist, and he knows it.

(Note, I’m only censoring this word because other people censor it and I sense some people find it jolting to see even if they read noncon. I'm not censoring it to try to make him look better. His past is a part of him, there's no getting around the fact that he's a r*pist. He's the last person who would want it forgiven or excused. He kinda hates himself ).

Q: I've been wondering if he could have done to other women what he did to sweet pea in the 1st chapter

He did at least make other women suck his dick in the past. As for how he sees his past behavior now, it'll come out eventually, not like an OOC monologue, like a word in passing or implied here or there.

Q: I think you wrote somewhere that Joel didn't approve of the behavior of some of his men with women, and that Carter wasn't like that (was I dreaming?)

The men who had sweet pea at the beginning of ch 1 are more physically aggressive and violent with women, physically forcing them and hurting them, whereas Joel calmly told sweet pea what to do (while he was heavily armed) and didn’t physically hurt her. The other men will smack them around and gang rape them. Joel feels like that behavior from men is weak, like if you're going to physically hurt someone, pick on someone your own size. He doesn’t feel moral superiority for this (I mean he doesn't see himself as a good guy), but he sees himself as stronger and more dominant than men who need to hurt a weaker person.

Q: Why is he so possessive and jealous, since day 1? In failed rescue : "He describes you. Joel’s jaw clenches and his eyes darken. He waits a beat before answering." I love that 😏 but it's super fast. Did she trigger something in him from day one?

When he initially decided she's his so quickly, most importantly, he means she's not anyone else's. He's in charge, he's claimed her, he's dominant, and he's the boss. That was his original intent and he didn't expect it to go further than that. But it goes beyond that because of the moment explained above. So it's also his primitive instinct that she's his, and that’s what you see when her bf describes her in your quote. Whatever connection or feeling was created by the way she looked at Joel made her special, and he couldn't let go of it. So she became like a precious possession at that point. Since then, he’s slowly evolved to where she’s not just a possession, but certainly still his.

—

Thank you so much for reading. I really adore everyone's interest and investment in raider!Joel. If you love raider joel, please interact with his fics -- it's always better late than never. Comments mean a lot no matter how small, and reblogs mean a lot regardless of blog size. I know most of raider's fans started as lurkers, and I don't judge for your lurking era. Most of my tumblr bffs started as lurkers.

Ik the tense is all over the place in this sorry lol

TY ILY 🖤🖤🖤

#raider!analysis #raider!joel #raider!joel miller #dark!joel miller #joel miller x reader #joel miller fanfic #tlou fanfiction #joel miller x f!reader #joel miller x female reader #tw noncon #cw noncon #toxicanonymity ☠️

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lu-is-not-ok · 1 year ago

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Lu's Guide to Sin Analysis

Welp, since my brain is too focused on having K Corp Hong Lu go full unga bunga in Mirror Dungeons to write full analyses, I decided I might as well give something else to all the people starving for Limbus Theory content.

So, here we are. A basic guide on how I approach the Sin Analysis portion of my analyses, covering my personal interpretations for each Sin, as well as how to use those when analysing both E.G.Os and Identities.

That way, ya'll can dabble in doing some of this on your own when I'm too busy grinding my way to 400 hours of play time on Limbus to write up full analyses.

Sounds good? Awesome. Under the cut we go, wheeeee!

Sin Interpretations

Let's start with the most important part - the Sins themselves.

I want you to take a moment and think about your own associations with those Sins. Perhaps your immediate thought is to take the words used literally. Maybe you immediately think back to the Biblical ideas of the Seven Deadly Sins. Mayhaps there's some other media you know that also uses Sins in some way, which you subconsciously default to when thinking about them.

Whatever those associations are, I want you to throw them away.

That's right. Whatever is telling you that Lust = Horny, Wrath = Angry, Envy = Jealous, etc, etc? Throw all of those preconcieved notions away.

This is the biggest mistake I see people make when trying to analyse Identities and E.G.O based on their Sins - they assume that those Sins have the same meanings in the context of Limbus as the popular, more common interpretations of them.

And while, sure, some of them can definitely overlap with what one would expect them to be, I think relying on those during analysis instead of trying to understand what the game itself is trying to tell us by using those Sins as symbols is doing its storytelling a massive disservice.

Do I think my personal interpretations of the Sins are a 100% accurate reading? No, of course not. I can't see into the mind of Kim Ji-Hoon or whoever else at Project Moon might have been the mastermind behind deciding what Sins connect to what. I have no way of knowing what exactly they intended here.

However, I do wish to believe that my interpretations not only strive to meet the game's storytelling on its own terms, but also hopefully make further analysis based on those interpretations a bit easier to wrap one's head around.

...God I really need to stop writing massive preambles and just get to the fucking point.

So let's actually get to The Fucking Point. Sin Interpretations, one by one. Let's fucking do it.

Wrath

The flames of revolution burn bright in the face of cold winds.

Wrath is the Sin of self-righteousness and defiance. To act with Wrath is to decide that one deserves better, that things around then should bend to their will, and then take matters into their own hands. It's the Sin of deciding one has the right to change something simply because they don't like the current state of things.

There are many ways one can act because of Wrath. It can show through trying to rebel against authority, to subvert one's fate, to escape one's unfavorable circumstances, or to even reject one's own true nature. To act with Wrath is to stand up for oneself and tell reality "No, I refuse!" loud and clear.

A common misconception of Wrath is the idea that anger is an inherent part of it. While it's true that those feelings often coincide with defiance, they're not required for one's acts to be fueled by Wrath. Some can be Wrathful while being completely calm and collected, as their acts of defiance could be more on the quiet and simmering side.

Likewise, being quick to anger isn't always a sign of Wrath. It's very possible for someone to have a short temper, while also being fully accepting of the reality they live in (Ryoshu, I am looking directly at you), thus lacking Wrath.

Lust

One's base insticts go all the way back to that genetic code.

Lust is the Sin of self-indulgence. It's the Sin of letting one's own desires and whims dictate one's actions. It's also the Sin of seeking personal fulfillment above all else. To act with Lust is to give up one's self-control and let one's instincts and wants guide them.

Unlike what the name and symbol might initially imply, Lust can include many different types of desires, not just the carnal.

Likewise, acts of Lust can be just as varied as one's desires. Satisfying one's most basic of needs, searching for a form of spiritual enlightenment, or even just saying the first thing that comes to mind because one feels like it are just a few examples.

Sloth

A stone will not care for what happens to it, nor the world around it.

Sloth is the Sin of apathy and resignation. Unlike other Sins, which mostly show through one's direct actions, Sloth can also show through inaction.

To act with Sloth is to ignore reality, to let oneself go along with whatever is happening with barely any complaints. As such, Sloth is commonly associated with blind obedience or unwillingness to act out.

Due to its nature as a Sin of resignation, Sloth can be seen as the direct opposite of Wrath, the Sin of defiance. This creates a unique situation where the inclusion of one can drastically shift the context of the other if both are a part of the same Identity or E.G.O.

Gluttony

Plants never stop waging wars, always wanting just a little bit more.

Gluttony is the Sin of hunger, and it's unique from the other Sins in that it equally represents two different ideas of that hunger, which can appear together just as often as they can be completely seperated.

The first type of Gluttony is one of the starving hunger of survival. In this context, to act with Gluttony is to do anything for the sake of scraping by and living to see another day.

The second type of Gluttony is the hunger for more, or in other words: greed. In this context, to act with Gluttony is to do everything for the sake of this idea of "more". To gain more wealth, to find more recognition, to make more progress.

Both of these types of Gluttony are unified in one main point - they are, by definition, endless. The struggle for survival never ends, unless one fails to survive. Likewise, there is no finite "more" that greed is reaching towards, it's a neverending process of one-upmanship.

Gloom

When a wave of emotion rises, many will be swept away in its wake.

Gloom is the Sin of dwelling on feelings. To act with Gloom is to be guided by one's negative emotions, to buckle under stress and let it control one's mind and actions.

While sadness, grief, and depression are the states of mind most commonly associated with Gloom, and are often a part of it, they're not inherent to it. The only "requirement" here is the experience of severe emotional duress, and acting out in direct response to it.

In a way, Gloom is the Sin of losing control over oneself, not dissimilar to Lust. However, the main difference here is the cause of losing that control. Gloom is the loss of self-control due to being overwhelmed by negative experiences, while Lust is the loss of self-control due to seeking out positive experiences.

Pride

Be careful, for that double-edged sword may cut you as well.

Pride is the Sin of ignoring consequences. Acts of Pride are all actions taken because of the belief that their benefits outweigh the cost in some way. While the most common way this can present is through actions that benefit oneself at the cost of others, it's not the only way Pride can manifest.

One can be Prideful when believing the benefit to many outweighs the consequences. Likewise, refusing to acknowledge the harm one brings to themself because their actions benefit them in some other way also counts as Pride.

The idea that Pride is inherently tied to selfishness or self-confidence is another common misconception. In fact, Prideful acts can manifest just as often from a lack of self-confidence or a misguided selflessness. Rather, one could interpret Pride as a form of willful ignorance, in a way.

Envy

Thorns don't go out of their way to harm, they merely react to your touch.

Envy is the Sin of reaction and retribution. It's the idea of doing something because of what someone else has done. By definition, one cannot act with Envy without some form of provocation.

Like is the case with many other Sins, acts of Envy can take many forms, from taking revenge to following orders. The main connecting idea here is letting oneself be influenced by another person, whether it's being coerced, provoked, ordered, or otherwise manipulated.

Out of all of the Sin misconceptions, seeing Envy as inherently tied to jealousy might be the worst one of all. While acts done out of jealousy would likely count as acts of Envy, they are but a miniscule part of the sheer scope that Envy represents.

...

Alright, so you know what each of those Sins means. Now it's time to figure out how to Actually Apply Them.

Sin Affinities in the context of Identities

The main way Sins play a role in a given Sinner's Identity is through their Sin Affinities. Mechanically, these are the Sins attributed to each of their skills, signifying both their type of Sin damage and what Sin resource they generate upon being used.

However, this is Project Moon we're talking about, and these fuckers can't keep their gameplay mechanics seperate from the story to save their lives.

So, this begs the question: what can we learn about a Sinner's given Identity through their Sin Affinities?

Here is the method that I believe works best in my experience:

The Sin affinities of each of an Identity's skills represent a different layer of their psyche and motivations. I'm going to try to show what I mean by using base Identities of the four Sinners who already had their own Canto.

Skill 1's Sin Affinity is the surface level motivation of the Sinner's actions. This is the most obvious and "shallow" reading of them and their actions, and also likely the one the Sinners themselves are most aware of.

Gregor's Skill 1 is Gloom due to him being constatly haunted by his trauma, with much of his cynicism and dark-ish sense of humor being shaped by his war experiences. Rodya's Skill 1 is Gluttony due to her tendency to value material goods and love for food, which are signs of her greed and will to survive respectively. Sinclair's Skill 1 is Pride due to him taking many actions (such as sharing his father's secrets or giving Kromer his basement key) for their immediate benefits, without considering the consequences. Yi Sang's Skill 1 is Gloom due to him falling into deep depression and letting the trauma of the past shape his current actions.

Skill 2's Sin Affinity is a deeper motivation of the Sinner's actions. It's delving deeper into their psyche to see what guides them in less obvious ways. This Sin Affinity can also have noticeably closer ties to the Sinner's background in one way or another.

Gregor's Skill 2 is Gluttony due to him being driven by the will to survive, most notably expressed by him leaving the rest of the veterans to escape the war and try to live after it ended. Rodya's Skill 2 is Pride due to her fully believing in what she does working out in her favor, completely ignoring consequences on the way. Her killing the pawnbroker is the biggest example of an act of Pride, as she fully believed that it would help her neighbourhood despite the consequences that murder would bring. Sinclair's Skill 2 is Wrath due to him not accepting his circumstances. His want to defy his future prosthetics procedure is what eventually led him to agreeing with Kromer, and his will to defy her is what drove him through the events of his chapter. Yi Sang's Skill 2 is Envy due to his passive nature and how easily he lets other people dictate his actions. It's especially notable in how after the League fell apart, he would have been willing to do anything Gubo told him at that moment.

Skill 3's Sin Affinity is what I would like to call a Sinner's Core Sin. It's the true main reason behind their actions, and has a much closer and direct tie into their past than the other Sin Affinities. In a way, this is the deepest layer of their psyche.

Gregor's Skill 3 is Sloth as his resignation to his circumstances is what colors much of his past. He learned that resistance is futile early in life, and it shows. Though he didn't want to fight in the war, he felt like he had no choice but to. All of his life, he simply listened to orders without complaint, unable to see a way to change his situation. Rodya's Skill 3 is Wrath as her self-righteousness and defiance is what drove her actions at the deepest level. She first joined the Yurodiviye because she wanted to bring change the state of her neighbourhood, and likewise left them when she no longer agreed with how they did things. Her murder of the pawnbroker was her biggest act of defiance, of taking matters into her own hands and trying to bring change to her reality at all cost. Sinclair's Skill 3 is Envy as much of his actions were dictated by other people. Social pressure was what led to him first breaching the trust of his family, and Kromer's coercion and manipulation is what then led to his family's death. In a way, you could also interpret Sinclair's arc in Canto III as one big act of Envy, as he finally tries to take revenge on Kromer for what she has done. Yi Sang's Skill 3 is Sloth as his apathy to the reality around him is what led to him ignoring the warnings signs of the League falling apart, and the resignation that followed could have resulted in him helping Gubo and the New League out with their horrible plans had there not been an intervention. It's only by the end of Canto IV that he finally manages to break out of this state for long enough to stand up for himself and decide to keep on living.

So, that's the basics of Sin Affinities when it comes to Identities! Now, some of you might be asking, "Hey Lu, what about Sin resources needed for Passives?", and my answer to that is...

Honestly, I don't entirely know! I do think there probably is some reason beyond pure gameplay mechanics... Buuuuut I don't think their importance is as major as the main Sin Affinities of a given Identity, especially since there isn't a single Passive that is activated by a Sin that the given Identity doesn't have any Affinity to.

Sin Affinities in the context of E.G.Os

Alright, so, when it comes to E.G.O, we run into some additional complexities. Unlike Identities, which can usually have their Sins Analysed with minimal additional context, E.G.O Sin Analysis has to be done under a specific angle.

This is because while Identities represent the Sinner as a whole person, E.G.Os represent a specific singular part of that Sinner.

Base E.G.Os usually seem to tie back to a specific event or action or some other thing in that Sinner's past. Likewise, E.G.Os derived from Abnormalities represent the ways that Sinner connects to that Abnormality's own themes.

In a way, the game's worldbuilding even acknowledges the fact that a Sinner can only use the E.G.O of an Abnormality they relate to in some way, as Dante's Notes describe the process of the Sinners using E.G.O as trying to make the Abnormality's emotions and identity their own.

That little tangent aside, there are two main things to analyze sin-wise when it comes to E.G.O - the Sin Affinity, and the Sin Resources necessary to use that E.G.O.

An E.G.O Sin Affinity works similarly to an Identity's Sin Affinities - for a Base E.G.O, it's the main Sin that action manifests as. For an Abno-derived E.G.O, it's the Sin that contextulizes the way the Abno's themes connect to the Sinner in question.

The Sin Resources an E.G.O needs is where things get fun. These are what a Sinner needs to be able to use the E.G.O, both mechanically AND story-wise. The Sins here represent what a Sinner has as their motivation and drive to fully reflect what that E.G.O represents. For Base E.G.Os, it's why they took the actions they did. For Abno E.G.Os, it's why they connect to that Abno's themes and why they're able to relate to it.

Now... There is one more thing about E.G.Os that I don't really talk about.

Sin Resistances.

The reason why I don't talk about them... Is because I have No Fucking Clue how to interpret them. There has to be some importance to them (Hong Lu being weak to Wrath in all of his E.G.O thus far, I am looking at you), I just don't know what it is. In fact, I doubt we even have enough information available to us right now to be able to say for sure.

I don't know how to end these posts dear fucking lord-

So uh. Yeah. That's. Everything that I think is important to mention on the topic of Sin Analysis and how I do it. If I ever change my mind on something or have an epiphany regarding one of the things I currently have no idea about, I'll probably reblog this post with an addendum or something, but until then...

Uh. Yeah. Hope this helps the people who wanna get into analyzing Limbus stuff but don't know where to begin. Or just people who wanna understand the method to my madness a little bit better.

I'm gonna go to sleep now, cause it's 4 AM already and I spent like the whole fucking night writing this post.

#limbus company #limbus company project moon #lcb analysis #lcb canto iv #lcb spoilers #lu speaketh #god help me

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herefortheships · 2 months ago

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I guess Bj wouldn't be as kind and selfless to let Lydia marry someone else, so is the dream theory more realistic?

I guess it depends entirely on interpretation, but my take on it is that for Betelgeuse to be selfish and possessive enough of Lydia to intervene in her relationships it would depend on the person she's involved with and how the relationship is going. Like I mentioned before in this post, he simply might not have had the power to intervene or even reach Lydia beyond just projecting flashes of his presence around her, when she was with Richard, but I can also believe that he just let her go and be happy during that time. However, he definitely wanted to intervene in her relationship with Rory, because Rory was a toxic partner and would eventually destroy Lydia. He was already destroying her, as a matter of fact. So in this case, Betelgeuse would never allow this man to have his Lydia, no way. He'd have done anything possible to get in the way.

When it comes to Lydia, Betelgeuse is just different. Lydia is special and he does love her, so he might just have been putting her best interest and her happiness first when she was with Richard, even above his own feelings, which is big for someone like Betelgeuse if you ask me. I don't know for sure how long he was like trapped in the model before Barbara and Adam dug him up (probably since the moment Adam built the model?), but my assumption is that even before he was bound to the model he was strapped down some other way by Juno in the afterlife (and if I add my own little headcanon, even before he was stopped by Juno he was an aimless spirit unable to move on, bound to the ritual of marriage), so Lydia is definitely the first woman he loved since Delores (don't think there were other ghost ladies in his afterlife, is what I mean), it would be natural that he became possessive of the one person he made a connection with in hundreds of years. Lydia is the first woman he's fallen in love with since Delores. This is confirmed in the wedding dance scene. That said, if he loves her truly, part of loving someone is letting them go if their happiness depends on it. (Once Lydya is free after Rory, though, the story is different; now Betelgeuse has a shot and I don't see him letting her go any time soon 😉).

I already shared my thoughts about the Dream Theory before, but I can add a little more here to answer the question more completely. While I personally have a different interpretation of the events in the movie, I do find the Dream Theory very intriguing and interesting to read. I can say in some ways it can be more realistic, considering Betelgeuse's nature, and looking at Lydia as a character. Lydia is attracted to the darkness; she likes the strange and unusual, and she described herself as such in the first movie. She might have at some point called on Betelgeuse after the Maitlands moved on, and opted to live with him rather than to live with another living person. The first Beetlejuice movie doesn't really go into Lydia's head when it comes to Betelgeuse. It could be that any persistent negative ideas she had about him were all put in her head by Barbara. As she grew older she might have changed the way she viewed him and even be intrigued by him. The Maitlands were definitely more her parents than Charles and Delia ever were, and Lydia always connected more with the dead than the living (we can throw in Astrid's resentment about this fact here as a reflection of guilt in Lydia's subconscious about it, if Astrid truly is a dream figure existing only in the dream). This is all speculative, of course, but yes I don't think it's unrealistic to conclude that it was all a construct of Betelgeuse's power. I have a different interpretation, which I talked about in the post linked above.

When it comes to Lydia, Betelgeuse is softer, and I think he would do pretty much anything for her. Whether that is being selfless and allowing her the freedom to love someone else, when he failed to reach her, or building a dreamverse for her to experience the things she can't have while being his forever partner.

#Beetlejuice #Beetlejuice dream theory #anon #anonymous #anonymous questions #Beetlebabes #Beetlejuice x Lydia #Betelgeuse x Lydia #Beej x Lyds #questions #answers

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legendofmorons · 1 year ago

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Hi! Im new to requesting here so i hope im not late or sending you something thats against your rules. I also hope something like this hasn't been requested before.

Could i request some semi-romatic chain x reader (platonic for Wind because he's baby) where the reader needs to go do something (example: shopping, hunting, scouting, etc) and they need one of the links to come with them because they aren't the best at fighting/aren't familiar with this hyrule. So the way they get their attention is by calling for their "Pretty boy". Bonus points if the chain(again platonic for Wind) had a crush on reader!

Idk if you've seen that tiktok audio/video where someone goes, "Pretty boy, with me I say!" "..." "..." "Oh! I'm pretty boy?" "Yes! That came out a bit too quickly-" "...pretty?"

All i can think of is basically reader accidentally calling the link for you choice "pretty boy" subconsciously. The reader could either play it off and the link could tease them or reader can go all in and continue calling said link "pretty boy".

Hopefully that makes sense and/or isn't too much? Also if possible could you make the reader gn? If you don't do it already? Also if doing all of the chain is too much you can just choose specific one's, i dont mind who you pick. Anyways thanks for even reading my request and i hope you have a good day!

I'm happy to do this! This is such a good idea and I'm excited to write it. If I didn't do it the qay ypu hoped let me know!

I went for vague crushing vibes on all of them, but Wind's. If this isn't what you had in mind please let me know!

-In alphabetical order and names are in bigger writing than the story parts

Pretty boy (chain)

Pairing: Chain x reader (seperate), Wind & reader

Rating:

Summary: you call the boys 'pretty boy' these are the results

Warnings:

Other: -In alphabetical order and names are in bigger writing than the story parts

-------

Four

You don't necessarily love going shopping. You don't hate it either, but it's not your definition of fun. So obviously you want someone to come with you.

Four is always fun to have around. He's sweet, and he's surprisingly good at haggling down prices.

"Do you need anything else?" Time asks you, eyeing you over and counting off your weapons for self defense.

"Not really." You say, turning towards the path.

You observe the dirt road before turning your head and calling over your shoulder, "Come on, pretty boy, let's go."

The entire group goes still and silent. They're all staring at you.

Why are they staring?

You replay your words. Oh- shit. You called Four pretty boy.

Well- he is a pretty boy but still!

You turn back to the group, taking in their confused expressions before your eyes land on Four.

Well.... You might as well commit.

"Well? Are you coming, pretty boy?" You ask, flashing a smile to show the playful intent behind the question.

Four blinks a few rides. And then points to himself slowly.

"Me?" He asks.

"Yeah, c'mon, pretty boy."

Four gives a little half fought off smile. "Pretty boy?"

"Do you not like the name?"

"No- I like it."

"Good. Come on then, I could use the company." You say.

Four follows you. It's hard to miss the little giddy pep in his step when he seems almost inclined to giggle.

You'll have to call him pretty boy more often!

Hyrule

"You should take someone with you if you're going to the dungeon. It's better with help." Time says evenly, "And take plenty of fariea and potions. Okay?"

"Okay." You say, "Let me grab my things and I'll bring Hyrule."

"Good idea."

You go to your little space in the clearing, grabbing your bag and making sure you have plenty of equipment. You don't like having to rely on other people all the time. No one does.

You finish getting yourself ready before you turn to Hyrule, "Comr on Pretty boy, you're with me.

"Did you just call Hyrule 'pretty boy'?" Legend asks, a sly look crossing his face.

"No!" You defend, face flushing as embarrassment crawls up your spine.

"It's okay!" Hyrule assures quickly, his own ears tinging with a blush. "I like that name!"

"You do?"

"Yeah!"

You smiles a little, glad he isn't upset about it. "Well... good!"

"Soo.... you think I'm pretty?" Hyrule asks, and his grin is anything but innocent.

"Maybe?"

"I knew it! I'm definitely your favorite."

"Good god." You groan, but you can find it in you to really be upset.

If only they weren't all teasing you the rest of the day. Oh, well.

Legend

You find yourself stuck on middle watch, which is the Worst. Capital W and all. Like for first watch you stay up late, last you wake up early.

But middle watch? You get woekn up and then get to try to go back to sleep later.

Gross.

Maybe someone is awake?

You scan the group, finding what is to be expected at this point.

Time sleeps as still as a log, hand one over the other on his chest.

Warriors sleeps like a soilder, light and still but heavy enough all at once.

Wild, Twilight, and Wind are all in a tangled bunch of limbs. Though to your surprise they managed to pull Four and Hyrule into their cuddle puddle tonight.

Sky sleeps all sprawled out and half out of his sleeping roll.

Then you land on Legend- who seems to be trying to get comfortable. Is he awake?

One way to find out.

"Hey! Pretty boy!" You stage whisper at him.

You don't know what possessed you to call him that. But you did, amd you don't think you're wrong.

He actually sits up, looking to you. "What?"

"Oh good, you're awake!"

"No shit. What did you call me?"

"Uh-" you pause, having hoped he would either not care or not notice. "Pretty boy?"

"That's what I thought. You got a crush on me?"

"I can think you're pretty without having a crush!" You hiss out, face flushing with embarrassment.

Maybe he is right.

"Bummer." Legend says, "Here I was thinking you had fallen head over heels for me. Since I'm your pretty boy.c

"Oh my god. Just forget I said it."

"Nope!" Legend says.

"Whyyyyy?" You groan.

Sky

You are over again pulled into upkeep chores that the quest requires. Which, whatever but you wish you weren't stuck on laundry today.

Laundry sucks with only the river, soap, and sun to do it.

Thankfully, you have Sky to help you. He's such a sweetheart that you really do appreciate his help.

So you settle at the river with the pile of clothes and some soap and resign yourself to the repetitive chore.

You cast a look to where Sky is and call out within much thought. "Come on, pretty boy! Might as well get started."

Sky and Twilight both go still before turning their eyes to you. Both looking fairly bewildered.

Oh. You said the 'pretty boy' part out loud. Whoops.

At least it's just Twilight and Sky here. They're not too bad about holding things against you. Usually.

"Me?" Sky questions, looking fairly confused but maybe just a little flattered.

His ears have a hint of pink on them.

How cute!

"Yeah?" You say, but it comes out a lot more like a question then he'd like.

"I've never been called that before."

"Real? Like- not ever?"

"Never.... I like it, though. Please keep calling me that?"

"Sure, if you like."

"I would."

You smile softly, bit your eyes go back to the laundry. "Well come on, pretty boy. We still have laundry to get done."

Time

You'd ask why you're the one who's always in charge of day to day things like groceries, supply runs, socializing, and all of that.... But you've seen the others try. Some are better in these aspects then others- but you are still the best.

So you're in charge of it.

You've already split the work and have the group gathered around you to hand out the assignments.

"Alright, Four, Warriors, and Sky, you're on weapon inventory. Wild, Hyrule, and Twilight's, you're on market duty. Wind and Legend, you're on laundry."

The others all share looks with their task partners.

"Where am I?" Time asks.

You give a smile when you speak, though you swear the nickname is an accident! "Your with me, pretty boy."

Silence.

Complete and utter silence.

Shit.

You said that out loud.

"Did you just-" Time starts.

You cut him off with a tight voice, "Can we please pretend I didn't?"

Warriors just laughs at you, the ass.

"I didn't say I hated it." Time says simply, though you can see the shit eating gleam in his eyes.

Fuck.

"Great. Well, Time, we're on dishes. "

"I thought I was ypur pretty boy."

You feel your face heat up, but you can even care. Why does je have to tease you? Your heart can't take it.

He's so handsome when he's being a menace. Which is a big problem.

Well also the whole he's being a menace thing. That's a bigger problem.

"You're just being mean to (Y/n)," Twilight says helpfully.

"How? I'm just asking why I went from pretty boy to Time."

You just groan, pulling your hands to cover your face.

This is going to be a long day.

Twilight

Why you're left to babysit the stubbornest Links is still beyond you, and yet here you are for the umpteenth time- babysitting them.

Twilight, Warriors, Legend, Wild, and Wind are scattered about the clearing in groups of one or two.

Thankfully, Wild and Wind are on opposite sides of the area and not collaborating to cause trouble.

Unfortunate you hear trouble before you see it.

"Fan out, get low! Pretty boy with me!"

They all turn to look at you as they drop into crouches.

Oh good. You called Twilight pretty boy. And no one knows who you meant. Great.

You groan because that's easier than dealing with feelings.

"You uh, were looking at me when you said- that name.... am- Am I pretty boy?" Twilight asks, and his voice is a little too thick to be played off.

"Yes. Now get over here we don't have much time."

Twilight does, quickly making his way to your side.

He gets there in time to throw a shield over your heads when the arrow start falling. What a gentleman!

When it's all over you can already feel his eyes on you.

"So uh... I'm pretty boy?"

"Yeah, guess you are." You answer him.

"You think I'm pretty?" Twilight asks, and it's both hopeful and heart breaking to hear.

How can he not see that?

"Of course I do. I have eyes." You say, playing off any and all other emotions.

"So... I'm your pretty boy then?"

You just sigh. At least he's having fun. "If you like to be, sure."

Warriors

You actually don't mind going to town to grab supplies, what you fo hate is pickings who goes with you. Sometimes there's no problem, but sometimes the others get pouty if they don't get to go.

Somethings about socialization? Who knows.

But as you're in Warrior's hyrule, he's coming with.

"Alright, pretty boy, let's go." You say as you turn to look at the captain.

Oh, you said that out loud. Shit.

Maybe he missed it?

"What did you just call me?" Warriors asks, and he looks half confused half endeared.

"Uhhhhh-" You blue screen with nearly no idea what's happening.

But you do register embarrassment blooming.

Warriors takes on a smug look as he asks, "You called me pretty boy, right?"

"Yeah. So?" You ask, failing miserably at keeping your cool.

"You think I'm a pretty boy?" He asks, and you swear his ears are tinkered pink.

Why are his ears pink?

Is he- flattered?

"Yeah... You're pretty. You're a boy. Seems pretty straight forwards."

"That's not usually a name I like."

"Oh. Then I'm sorry I called you that."

Warriors shakes his head and gives you a soft look. Earnest and hinging almost on smitten "Actually- I like when you say it."

"Oh."

"Yeah."

"Well, come on then pretty boy." You say, flashing a smile.

"Lead on, (Y/n)."

He links his arm through yours eaaily.

Wild easily.

You find yourself watching Wild as he crouches and waits patiently for the perfect shot. You've been running low on meat lately and you're out here to aid his hunt.

Does ot usually take so long?

You can't tell.

But you would like to have a break from squatting a little behind him.

"Wild." You whisper just barley audible.

He dosen’t seem to here you.

"Wild."

No answer.

"Link?" You call again.

He stil dosen’t respond.

So you try again, "Pretty boy?" You say, words falling out of yourouth without thought or permission.

He stiffens, head whipping around. "(Y/n)?

"Are we even seeing animals to hunt?" You ask softly.

"No- wait- what?"

"How much longer are we going yo sit here? It's been like two hours."

"Twenty minutes. And did you call me pretty boy?"

"Oh- yeah, I was hoping you wouldn't notice."

"Oh... Why?"

"I was thinking we should move to a better place to hunt?"

"Oh... Okay."

"Any ideas on where?" You ask.

"Uh- maybe a hill.... Why did you call me pretty boy?"

"It just slipped out. I won't call you that again though, promise."

"No... Uh- I like the name.... I just don't think I've been called that before."

You have a harder time believing that. Wild really is pretty, has je eveb seen his own face?

"That's surprising. "

"It is?"

"Yeah. It is."

"Well.... I like the name, at least from you." Wild says again, his ears tinged pink and a barley hidden smile present.

"Yeah? You don't want Legend calling you that?"

"Not really."

"That tracks, pretty boy. Come on let's move to a better vantage point."

"Okay." Wild says, and you swear if he were a hardened hero and traveler, he'd be giggling.

Wind

You don't mind being put on foraging duty, especially not when the sailor is your companion. Wind has always been so fun to be around. The kid is like a brother to you almost.

He's a few feet away, digging through a mess of greenery that seems pretty weird to you, but he seems happy. And thats good.

"Hey, (Y/n)?" Wind asks, turning his eyes to you.

"Yeah, kid?"

"Are these those poisonous berries Wild showed us?"

You squint as you scrutinize the purple berries Wind holds up. They definitely look similar.

"I'm not sure. Better leave them alone to be safe, though."

Wind sighs, "I thought you'd say that."

"Then why even ask, pretty boy?"

You don't know why you said it, but you did, and he's a cute kid. So whatever. It's honest, at least.

"What?"

"What part are you confused about, kiddo?"

"Why did you call me pretty boy? Is that an insult?"

"No, Wind, it's not an insult. Not from me at least."

"Oh. Good!"

You bite back the laugh that bubbles up from your throat, trying not to he overtly rude. His fave is definitely one you'll remember.

Wind looks pleased, and maybe a little embarrassed. But the glee behind his eyes is genuine.

"So, I'm your pretty boy?"

"Sure kid." You say, trying again not to laugh.

He's cute, in that kid way with the too big grin.

"The others are gonna be SO jealous!"

You do laugh this time, warm and bright, and glad to see him happy.

"Be nice, Wind."

"Never!" He calls as he starts foraging again.

#misty writes #linkeduniverse #lu #linked universe x reader #misty answers #amistakehadhappened #lu time #lu wild #lu legend #lu hyrule #lu warriors #lu four #lu sky #lu twilight #lu wind #lu chain #lu chain x reader

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psychelis-new · 2 years ago

Text

pick a pile: "Who are they"

take a breath and choose the photo or number that calls you the most to read about who are the people that are around you or will be soon (either 3d or 5d). it works mostly for group of people (friends, colleagues, classmates, family, Guides/energies), and it completes my old triptych idea: if you want to check my pac mastelist you can find the old readings about "Who is he" and "Who is she" (the first two parts).

don’t take the reading too seriously. only take what resonates with you and leave the rest. if you're not called by any pile, let this reading slid as it may not hold messages for you. if you're called by more than one pile, there may be messages in each of those piles. remember that is a general reading and some things may not resonate with you. energies can change and readings are based on present ones (as you read); you're always in charge of your life.

(photos found on unsplash)

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1 2 3

- ’ - ’ - ’ - ’ - ’ - ’ - ’ - ’ - ’ - ’ - ’ - ’ - ’ - ’ - ’ - ’ - ’ - - ’ - ’ - ’ - ’ - ’ - ’ - ’ - ’ - ’ - ’ - ’ - ’ - ’ - ’ - ’ - ’ - ’ -

pile 1

This is people mostly in your 3d but that you don't feel connected to. Or you feel inferior to, somehow.

Honestly it could be that something happened (even not directly with them but in your past, and made you behave differently and close off or fear being judged) or it's simply that you don't believe too much in yourself (you know... I think you totally should do that: we're all different, there ain't no worse or better. Those who are "better" than you in math may be worse than you in gym, you know... it's only differences, things some of us may like more and do better than others who may need to work more to get the same result). Anyway, it feels like you took this situation for what it seems to you "they will never like me" or anything on that wavelenght, but if you dared to come a bit closer, to try and let them in, to see the real them, to turn on the light (also on you, and be vulnerable about your fears), you would see a different reality. Sometimes we don't let communication do its job, or we use it wrongly by just saying things halfway and hoping the other understands what we mean but... the other doesn't have a crystal ball. They cannot read our mind, only our body language and random fearful speeches (and both of these do yell specific subconscious messages to the other). Take courage, be brave and try. Be the first starting a communication, and don't be scared to have to hold it first for a while. Let yourself know the other, be interested in them, and let them do the same. Some walls need effort to be thrown down, just learn to let go off the ones that you aren't supposed to bring down. Be respectful of them and you too (learn when it's right to give up and try with someone else).

song: that girl is you | dave matthwes band

- ’ - ’ - ’ - ’ - ’ - ’ - ’ - ’ - ’ - ’ - ’ - ’ - ’ - ’ - ’ - ’ - ’ -

pile 2

These may be people (for only a bunch of you it can be one person) from your childhood, people you have been knowing for a while; people from a past life of yours or even your ancestors looking over you.

Their purpose is to support you, to help you go through life's hardships and joy, and feel less alone. Actually: you're not alone, they're always there, they never leave your side, either if you acknowledge them or not. They're always there for you. I do feel a very supporting warm friendly/brotherly/loving protective energy around you, no matter if you can't see these people yet, they're around you energetically. They help you, guide you, try to lessen your stress and think straight, be more clear and determined, balanced, in your mind and how you experience life. They're teaching you a lot. I do think for most of you it's your Guides or ancestors we're talking about, but it could be people from your soul family you still have to meet. They are now literally trying to guide you through some harsh decision you need to take, or out of a pretty difficult moment in which you may have felt stuck and fallen back into some old mental pattern that you need to leave behind, in order to be able to experience new things. New beautiful things. I think they're also trying to put someone on your path in some way, or you on the path of someone else, so that maybe you two can help each other. Just keep being hopeful and don't worry: things will change the moment you allow yourself to think they can and take the right action (starting with leaving the past where it belongs).

For some of you it could be your romantic soulmate higher self guiding you together with your ancestors/guides.

song: hold on | the internet

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pile 3

These are people or energies that may be spiritual or can be part of your ancestors/Guides/Angels group.

They are probably guiding you through an awakening or some sort of tower moment. They're trying to bring clarity in your life, helping you see through all the overwhelming emotions and the overthinking. They're helping you see the light again from in between the darkness, by moving their wings around you. Always rely on them, ask them for help and guidance. And if you have someone in the 3d that you can consider a mentor or that you feel you can talk to and ask for help to, please do that. Especially if it's a community and you feel better after talking with the people there. Seek comfort, you need that at this time. Tese energies want you to trust your inner guidance too. To trust that things are only momentarily and that you can get out of this situation. Despite it feels scary and you feel lost. Things will improve. They're always by your side, giving you signs of their presence and signs that can help you get out of this moment (which may be happening many times in your life, but if it's the first or one of the firsts, it may be pretty scary, ik) and understand it. These energies and people are always connected to you (or you can reach for them anytime you feel down), call on them if you need help in making things clear, if you cannot see the light. They'll guide you through. Try. Give it a try.

song: angel of mine | monica

#pac #pick a pile #pick a card tarot #pick a picture #pick a card #pick a photo #free tarot reading #tarot readings #tarot reading #tarots #tarotblr #divination #clairs readings #psychic readings #intuitive #intuition #intuitive readings

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cy-cyborg · 10 months ago

Text

Writing Disability: Let us Love like everyone else

[ID: An illustrated picture of a red rose on a pink background. To the left of the rose is white text that reads "Writing Disability: Let us Love like everyone else. /End ID]

Romance is one of the top-selling genres in the world across mediums, and pretty much every movie, TV show, book and game has at least one romance sub-plot. You don’t need to look far to find it. However, when it comes to disabled characters, a lot of creators shy away from giving us romantic plot lines or even hesitate to address the topic of disability and attraction being present in the same character at all. So, since it’s Valentine’s day, I thought now would be the perfect time to discuss it.

It can be easy to miss if you aren't paying attention, but a surprising number of stories in various mediums will pair up most if not all of their main cast of characters by the end of the plot… with the exception of the disabled characters. whether they be explicitly stated to be disabled or just coded as such, disabled characters are more frequently left out of relationships by the story's end. Sometimes, the disabled character will be completely disinterested or the subject is just never addressed, such as with Toph from Avatar the Last Airbender. Toph is implied to have had multiple relationships by the time of the sequel series, but unlike the rest of the original gang, we never see it on screen, so I personally think it doesn't count for reasons I'll get into in a moment. Alternatively, the disabled character will show interest in someone, but their affection is just not reciprocated, such as in Disney’s Hunchback of Notre Dame. Disney's Hunchback is a particularly noteworthy example since it's one of the only theatrical Disney movies where the main character has a clearly stated love interest, but doesn't end up with them by the end.

ID: an screenshot of the hunchback of notre dame showing Quasiemodo, a man with a hunchback and facial differences swinging and singing on at spire at the top of the notre dame cathedral. /End ID

In the latter case, where the disabled character’s love is not reciprocated, these stories will often focus on the importance of self-discovery and self-love. An important message to be sure, but the fact that these “you don’t need a partner as long as you love yourself” stories very often centre disabled characters is frustrating, to say the least (If the character isn’t disabled, they’re often deemed “undesirable" for other reasons, such as being fat, but that’s a topic for another day).

Of course, the reason the character doesn’t end up with their love interest doesn't have to be because of their disability specifically. Even if they were turned down for other reasons, it can still contribute to the stereotype that disabled people can’t find love even when they want to, just aren’t desirable as partners (a sentiment that is especially commonly directed at visibly disabled people) and contributes to the overall lack of representation of disabled relationships.

In the other case I mentioned before, where a disabled character is just not interested in romance, can look different depending on the kind of disability the character has, but in my experience, it often comes from the same place: discomfort. This isn't necessarily a conscious thought or decision on the creator’s end, mind you, but just because it's not intentional, doesn't mean it's not doing harm, even if it’s subconsciously.

A lot of the time, many creators don't even consider giving their disabled characters a love interest. the thought never even occurs to them. I can't pretend to know why for sure, but if I had to take a guess, its because the idea of disability and romance just don't go together in most people's eyes, so the thought never even crosses these creator's minds. But why? it comes back to that discomfort.

When we are talking about physical disabilities and those effecting the body but not the brain, the discomfort can come from a few places. First is the discomfort with disabled and visibly different bodies and how they work as a whole. I've spoken about this in the past, but just the idea of disability alone often makes non-disabled people deeply uncomfortable, and when it comes to visible disabilities, they are often forced to confront that, something that a lot of people are resistant to. they don't like thinking about it, and while many non-disabled creators have dealt with this discomfort enough to include us in their stories, they haven't deconstructed it enough to include us having things like romantic relationships.

This is why, despite the fact that Toph has children in The Legend of Korra, I’m still using her as an example. We see the other main character’s relationships and partners in the original show and in The Legend of Korra directly, but never hers. The most we ever hear of Toph’s love life is that Sue and Lin, her daughters, have different fathers. While the mention was good, when looking at this through the lens of “people are uncomfortable with disabled people being in relationships” you can see how the openly disabled character’s relationships only ever happening off screen and occasionally mentioned might still be an issue, even if that wasn’t the creator’s intent.

ID: A screenshot of the legend of Korra showing Toph, a middle-aged woman with black hair and metal armour, lecturing her two daughters. /End ID

this disparity becomes particularly noticeable, however, in media aimed at an older audience where romantic relationships often mean sex. When the relationship is expected to be sexual in nature, an extra layer of discomfort often appears. A lot of people just quite simply don't understand how sex works when you have a physical disability, and are extremely uncomfortable simply looking it up (there are educational resources out there on the subject, and even disability content creators who focus on educating people about sex and disability, I’m not talking about looking up porn). Often times, they just avoid it by simply not giving their disabled characters relationships of any kind to avoid having to address those questions.

There is also the fact that many people infantilise those with disabilities and associate us with children. This is more common when it comes to non-physical disabilities, such as those under the neurodivergent umbrella (which refers to any disability that primarily impacts the brain) and I'll talk about that in a moment, but it does happen with physical disabilities too, most notably with little people and disabilities that impact someone’s height or physical development. Often, for those of us with physical disabilities, the infantilization comes from people either directly associating us with children because of our appearance, or feeling as though we need to be protected like children.

When talking about disabled people in relationships, this might look like someone being hesitant to pair a disabled character up with someone without a disability because they “can’t protect themselves” if the relationship goes bad. This isn’t something I’ve seen stated directly much in media, mind you, but it is a response I’ve gotten from a surprising number of people in real life when I’ve asked why they don’t like the idea of “people like me” (meaning amputees and wheelchair users) dating. I wouldn’t be surprised if it’s the reason some authors and creatives avoid inter-abled relationships in their works based on how often I got that comment when I started dating; they are concerned about the power imbalance. but this mindset is based on both infantilization and the stereotype that physically disabled people are always inherently weaker. If you’re not always worried about how non-disabled characters would protect themselves in a relationship, why are you only worried it when one of the characters is disabled?

However, like I mentioned before, the disabled character being simply uninterested in romance or sex isn't unique to visibly and physically disabled people. It’s is so common with neurodivergent folks, in fact that it’s become a bunch of tropes all of their own, with the most common variant being where specifically autistic or autistic-coded characters will often be the only aromatic or asexual people in a story’s cast.

For those unfamiliar with the terms, aromatic people are those who experience little to no romantic attraction, or those who experience it differently to most, while asexual people are those who experience little to no sexual attraction (or, again, experience it differently to most). It’s a bit more complex than that, and both terms exist on a spectrum, but in order not to get too side-tracked, I’ll leave it there. I‘d highly, highly recommend Jaiden Animation’s video on the subject though if you want to learn more in a beginner-friendly way.

There’s this idea that a lot of non-disabled people get about neurodivergent folks, especially those with developmental or intellectual disabilities, that we are these sweet little innocent beans who don’t want to or simply can’t engage with “adult” things. In most cases though, this isn’t the true. For some folks, including many creators, this is once again an unconscious bias and is the result of them simply not thinking about or deconstructing their ideas around different kinds of disabilities. In these cases, the idea usually stems from the fact that there are some (keyword some) disabilities under this category that do impact someone’s ability to engage with things like sex and romantic relationships, and most people not overly familiar with the disability community just don’t know enough to understand that just because some people under this category can’t or don’t want to engage, doesn’t mean we all can’t.

Unfortunately though, when this is pointed out to a lot of people, instead of adjusting their viewpoint or seeking more information, they get severally uncomfortable about the idea, even going so far as calling someone who is dating someone with a developmental or intellectual disability as “creepy” because they, once again, associate people with these kinds of disabilities with children. Since children can’t consent, neither can we. This is, once again, infantilization, but much more directly.

While I haven’t seen the full episode (or much of the show as a whole), so I don’t really want to comment on weather it handled the subject well, I do at least appreciate that the show Glee calls this line of thinking out when one of the characters, Becky, who has down’s syndrome, begins dating someone without a disability. The parts of the episode I have seen shows several characters around Becky expressing concern, but their bias is called out by the end of the episode. What I have seen of Glee was during a particularly long stay in hospital while being given pretty strong medication so my memory of it is spotty (not to mention everything was out of order) so like I said, I can’t comment on weather or not it was good per say, but I do remember the discussion this episode sparked in my high school with students and teachers alike, and I remember it being the starting point for some important conversations with people.

As I said, there are some disabilities under the neurodivergent umbrella that might prevent a character from engaging in a romantic or sexual relationship. some. however, it's incredibly important to remember that a lot of these kinds of disabilities exist on a spectrum of support needs, and if the character in question's disability would be preventing them from doing so, they would typically be on the very severe ends of those spectrums and have very substantial support needs in other areas of life too. The vast majority of neurodivergent characters in media don't fall into this category. If you are writing someone who has these higher support needs (and please do, we need more characters like that!), be sure to do your research and double check your assumptions about their capability to engage though. Ensure it's actually reflective of their disability and isn't just based on stereotypes and misinformation. And don't forget, if you’re ever unsure, you can always check with a sensitivity reader or disability consultant.

Even in cases where a disabled character does get into a relationship, one of a few things frequently happen that I think authors might want to be mindful to avoid - or at least approach with caution.

The first is that the disabled character, despite being in a relationship, will be completely disinterested in sex (or any part of a physical relationship, such as kissing, if the content is aimed at a younger audience), often being implied or directly stated to be asexual. The first example of this that springs to mind for me is Sheldon Cooper from the Big Bang Theory. While Sheldon is never confirmed as autistic within the show, he displays many autistic traits throughout both the original show (albeit in a stereotypical way that’s played mostly for laughs) and in the spin-off, Young Sheldon. When Sheldon does eventually get into a relationship though and even gets married, he is shown to be very, very reluctant and overall disinterested in sex.

ID: A screenshot from Big Bang Theory of Amy and Sheldon sitting on a couch, where Amy looks annoyed towards someone off camera, while sheldon looks at her, confused. /End ID

So what’s the problem with this? in a vacuum, nothing. Some people don’t care for sex and don’t experience sexual attraction, and it’s fine to show that - we need more ace representation! I myself am disabled (an amputee and autistic) and asexual, shouldn’t I be glad to see characters like me?

Well, the issue isn’t that this is unrealistic, but rather overplayed and often contains a lot of misinformation about both asexual people and disabled folks.

My disabilities have nothing to do with my asexuality - which remember just means someone doesn’t experience sexual attraction; it has nothing to do with weather or not someone enjoys sex. However whenever asexuality and disability are paired together in the same character, it’s almost always because of the character’s disability. As in, the person in the wheelchair is ace because they can’t feel anything down there so they stopped feeling attracted to people (which is not even close to how that works, but is a real example I’ve seen on a few occasions now) or the autistic person is just too invested in telling you about trains, science, superhero’s or whatever their special interest is, to be worried about sex.

The other issue is, like I said, there’s a lot of examples of disabled ace characters already, and considering how poorly most are handled, many disabled people and asexual people alike are just tired of seeing it. Honestly, until both disability and ace representation and understanding as a whole, improve independently, it’s a combination of identities I’d recommend avoiding in your work, at least for now.

Finally, when a disabled character does enter a relationship, sexual or not, a very common dynamic is that the character will often get very insecure and scared that the person they’re dating doesn’t actually like them, or worries that the other person is settling for them, often resulting in their partner reassuring them that they love them, "despite their disability." A recent example of this can be seen in the web series Helluva boss between the character Fizzarolli, an imp who is a quadrilateral amputee with broken horns and facial scarring, and his boyfriend Asmodeus. While Fizzarolli’s insecurities are primarily focused on living up to impossible standards for success, he shouts during a panic attack that he believes that Asmodeus will leave him if he isn't successful, stating that without it, "this is who I am" - ripping off his hat to show his broken horns and scars (something we are told that he acquired in the same accident he lost his limbs in).

ID: A screenshot of Helluva Boss showing Fizzarolli, a cartoon imp in a clown outfit, patchy makeup and broken horns, anxiously holding his jester's cap in his hands. Behind him, Asmodeus, a large blue, feathery demon in a striped suit, looks on, concerned. /End ID

My problem with scenarios like these is once again, not that it’s unrealistic, but that it shows up constantly. The intention with these kinds of scenes is often to assure the character and by extension, disabled readers or viewers, that they are in fact deserving of love. That just because they’re disabled, doesn’t mean they’ll never find anyone. Once again, it's a good message, however, because of how prevalent this exact scene is, it can actually have the opposite effect.

Let’s step back from disability for a moment: If you see dozens and dozens of people with a feature you have, saying they are insecure about that same feature in almost all of of the shows you watch, the books you read, the games you play where characters with this feature appear, even if you aren’t insecure about it yourself, seeing over and over again that others are, it’s natural that it would start to make you doubt or wonder if you should be. Doubly so if that very insecurity prompts these big, often explosive and emotional scenes.

This was the case for me as a kid, I never really cared much about my disability outside of being annoyed that people stared at me, but as I got older, and I saw more and more characters in the media I consumed saying they were certain no one could love someone like them - someone like me - I became more and more worried. The messages that were supposed to be reassurances, instead told me over and over that the people these characters ”found” were the exception, not the rule, and that most people would, in fact, care that I was disabled and not want to date me. When all my friends began dating and getting into relationships, I began to worry that I would never find “my exception to the rule” and be alone forever.

I didn’t really get over that mindset until well into my 20’s, well into my current relationship with my now fiancé, and I know I wasn’t alone in these concerns. I used to work with teenage amputees, and this was a very, very common fear across all genders and sexualities. I still see it in forums and social media groups whenever newly disabled people join, it’s one of the more common fears brought up, and while I get that scenes like these are meant to reflect this reality and help, more often than not, they’re doing the opposite.

For once, I would love to see a disabled character get into a relationship, and for there not to be any mention of “are you sure?” “How could you ever love someone like me?” “I’m worried you don’t actually find me attractive” etc. These conversations are realistic, yes, but we see them so often that I just really wish I could see more examples of stories where the validity of the disabled character’s relationship is never questioned and is never a concern. It just is.

Of course, as with most of the subjects I’ve talked about before, many of these points are less of a concern if you have multiple disabled characters. If you only have one disabled character and have their love interest reject them, it can perpetuate these stereotypes about disabled people being unable to find love, but if you have another character who is successful in that reguard? Well, it’s much less of a concern. The same goes for if one of your disabled characters is asexual or aromantic, but there’s another disabled character who isn’t, or if one disabled character is insecure about their disability in their relationship, but another isn’t.

Of course, be mindful not to go too far in the other direction either. A lot of people are pretty shocked to learn that disability fetishization is also a thing, and while you shouldn’t shy away from showing disabled characters in sexual relationships just because they’re disabled, it is something you need to be mindful of if your story contains more explicit content. As a general rule of thumb, sowing your disabled characters engaging in the same kinds of relationships, romantic and sexual (including casual hook-ups and one-night-stands) is great, so long as it a) fits the character and the story, and b) is actually inline with how you’re treating those topics with the non-disabled characters.

Personally, I don’t really feel like I’m the best person to advise on where exactly that line between just showing disabled people in sexual relationships/situations and fetishisation is, though the general advice I’ve heard is to ask yourself if the focus is on the disability, or if the person just happens to be disabled. On that same note, I’m also not really comfortable explaining details of how sex works when you’re disabled. If you want to know about either of these topics, there are a plethora of disability content creators who focus specifically on those subjects.

To sum this all up though, disabled adults are, well, adults, so don’t be afraid to treat us as such. Show us in relationships where the non-disabled partner’s affection isn’t a matter of debate or insecurity, show us being intimate and having sex (if that’s something you were doing with your non-disabled characters), let us be confident in those relationships, the same as everyone else, and most importantly, remember that a disability doesn’t automatically mean someone just won’t be interested in us, or we won’t be interested in them.

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jasontoddsno1simp · 5 months ago

Text

If Jason Todd is a cop, then so is every vigilante in Gotham

They are ALL taking the law into their own hands - in case you numb nuts forgot, vigilantism is illegal. The only difference is that Jason is up front about the fact that he kills people, sometimes.

Instead of hashing and rehashing this stupid moral debate for the 3928281th time - like DC wants us to because they refuse to deal with the way they let one of their writers kill off a kid and the subsequently retconned that child's story so they could keep selling Robin merch - we have some fun with it.

Why does Jason kill?! What experiences in his life led him down this path?! I read an excellent post earlier about how Jason has all these monologues about Big Moral Ideas^TM and how that juxtaposes his actions. And instead of digging into that, people just leave it at "Oh, so you're a hypocrite, eh?! Got standards for everyone else that you feel you shouldn't have to follow, huh?!" as if that's an indictment of his character. And I mean, it is!! But why?! Why would Jason hold the heroes to standards that he doesn't deign to hold himself to?!

Could it be that he's positioned himself as a necessary evil?! That he's subconscious absorbed Bruce's inflexible moral framework?! That, according to that framewok, he understands that heroes must conduct themselves in a specific manner, else their heroism be called into question?! That he feels he's been called into a different direction?! That Gotham - Park Row - doesn't need another cape to save them, but rather they need someone who will avenge them?!

Jason, at his best, is jaded, but pragmatic. He doesn't rly believe in the hero community anymore, but he understands the necessity. He understands that he cannot be Batman, because he doesn't possess the moral inflexibility of Bruce. He doesn't feel regret after killing someone, because in his mind, that's what needed to happen to keep his people safe. And that makes him a villain. Something he does a lot of work to do to make himself feel okay about (which I don't think he does, but that's for later).

A more cynical interpretation of Jason would be that he doesn't believe in redemption. That once someone strays off the straight and narrow, their life needs to end. And I mean, in some cases that might be true. Humans are capable of some truly heinous shit and once you unlock that part of your soul, there's no going back. That's what I think, anyway. But to someone like Bruce, someone who condemns all killing, he'd make no room for any such distinctions. Especially with Jason being unrepentant.

And this is where we get into the meat and gristle of Jason and Bruce's dynamic - for Jason to operate under his own moral framework, Bruce must compromise his own.

In other words, for Bruce to sleep tight at night, he must strip his son of his agency. And Jason, someone who has had his agency stripped of him many a time in his life, is not too keen on that.

To me, Jason's story is about agency - about how those of us who aren't born into privilege must fight for our agency at every turn. As a child, Jason was stripped of his agency by poverty and doomed to be another lost cause by a system that isn't designed to help. Meeting Bruce and becoming Robin was a turning point for young Jason's life because it allowed him to claw back the agency that was stolen from him. Or so he thought. Because the second he didn't behave the way Bruce expected him to (and lest I remind you all that Bruce had been subtly adultifying this young boy since the second he met him), there goes his agency. Bruce strips him of the Robin mantle, therefore stripping him of his agency.

And before the Good Dad Bruce truthers come after me, I know this wasn't Bruce's intention - he took Robin away because he saw the way Robin was negatively affecting his son. And, to get a little meta here, Bruce probably clocked that even if he was able to get Jason the help he needed to manage his trauma, he couldn't allow him to be Robin anymore. Because Robin is a hero, and - according to Bruce - a hero's convictions must be unshakeable, lest their heroism be called into question.

And what makes for unshakeable convictions?! An inflexible moral framework with hard lines that must never be crossed. And if they are crossed, then said hero must throw themselves upon the sword in repentance.

Something that Jason refused to do.

And... if I'm being honest with you, there's no way forward with Jason's story without him reacting caustically to Robin being taken away. No matter how gently Bruce broke the news to Jason or how empathic he was, Jason would have reacted like a cat that had been slapped and thrown out the window. Because it was more than Robin. It was always more than Robin.

I'm gonna cap my analysis here because this has gotten way too fucking long, but my point is that if you're gonna do any kind of analysis or criticism of a character, I need y'all to reach deeper. Because what's the fucking point of shallow ass takes like "Jason is a cop cause he kills"?! Huh?! Not only is it fundamentally misinterpreting the character and his motivations - cops are authoritarians, something Jason is diametrically opposed to - but it's a dead end. It's a conclusion with no thesis statement.

#Oh boy #I know this is probably gonna inspire Some Responses^TM #But just know that I apply v liberal use of the block bottom #If you're not gonna take what I'm saying seriously #Or come at me in bad faith #I won't hesitate #Jason Todd

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princessamericachavez · 2 years ago

Text

911 6x11 Coda

Read in AO3 too

“So this dreamland of yours,” Eddie says after a comfortable silence filled only by the background noise of the sports commentators, “what was it really like?”

“Super freaky,” Buck huffs a laugh. “I told you already.”

“No,” Eddie drawls the word with playful annoyance. “You told us the saccharine version because Christopher was there. Or because you didn’t want someone else to know the details. I don’t know,” he shrugs. “All I know is you aren’t telling the whole story.”

“I am,” Buck tries, but can hear the uncertainty in his own voice.

Eddie finally peels his eyes off the tv screen to pin him with a knowing look.

“Buck, I know you. You were holding back. Which… fine, you don't owe the entire world details about whatever was going on in your brain during a coma. I get it. But, c’mon, it’s me. Spill.”

Buck bites the inside of his cheek. There are details he really doesn't want to reach the others. He doesn’t want to upset anyone with the fucked up things his subconscious came up with. But… yeah, this is Eddie. Somehow, it feels wrong not to tell him.

“Bobby was dead.”

Even now, in the real world, having seen him just a few hours ago for lunch, the words get stuck in his throat. Buck hates the way his voice shakes with the ghost of heartbreak, still remembers the sensation of the world crashing down around him when Chimney (fake Chimney) told him. He tightens the grip of his beer, letting the sting of his wounded hands ground him in this reality.

Eddie arches his eyebrows. “What happened?”

“He… fell off the wagon. No one noticed, until it was too late.”

“Because you weren’t there?” Eddie’s expression turns critical. “Buck, you do know Bobby’s sobriety isn’t your responsibility, right?”

“I know. I know. The world doesn’t revolve around me,” he rolls his eyes, taking a sip of his beer to wash down the bitterness. “But you… you didn’t know Cap before. Before you joined, for a while, he was… different. Too reserved. Like- like he thought if he didn’t get to know us, we’d be better off or something.”

He can see the confusion in Eddie’s eyes while the information sets in. He can’t blame him. This Cap, this Bobby, is so different it’s almost impossible to reconcile him with the one he first met.

“Anyway,” he tries to lighten the air, “I guess I was annoying enough to break him out of his shell a little, or make him laugh. Or maybe I’m just giving myself too much credit.”

Eddie lets out a noncommittal hum. “Guess I can see that.”

It feels good to have said it, to let it out, to have someone else know. He trusts Eddie’s discretion and knows that, if Bobby’s death comes to haunt him in his nightmares, he’ll at least have someone to tell. He’s ready to return his attention back to the game when Eddie pops a sudden question:

“And me? What was I like?”

“I told you.”

“Angry, yeah,” Eddie frowns. “So that’s it? Without you I’m just… angry guy?”

Buck laughs, shaking his head, and is about to change de subject when he notices that Eddie looks bothered by the statement. As if whatever Buck’s subconscious said about him was a big offense.

“It wasn’t about me,” he offers.

Eddie pins him with another look meant to strip him bare of his secrets. Buck looks down at his hands, unable to meet his eyes:

“You- you lost Chris. To your parents. Big messy legal battle. Hen- Hen said they declared you unfit to be a single dad and a firefighter.”

Eddie takes a big gulp of beer with his eyes on the screen.

“Oh, yeah… that’d piss me off.”

To Buck’s relief, he sounds lighthearted about it. He guesses it’s easier when it’s just a made up crazy reality in someone else’s dying brain, when it didn’t feel so real and definitive as it did to him.

“Guess no one else there introduced you to Carla.”

“And you weren’t there,” Eddie points, “to fight for him.”

“No, I wasn’t…”

Eddie nods, still staring at some point in the distance, clearly not watching the game. Buck waits him out, let’s the idea settle, because he knows his silences enough to guess this one prefaces a statement.

“And you didn’t meet me there?” He finally asks and, again, he seems offended with Buck’s subconscious.

Buck feels the need to defend himself:

“To be fair, you would’ve just called me crazy and called the cops on me or something. I mean, Chim and Hen were ready to roll with it, but you don’t even believe in jinxes. What do you think you would’ve said if a guy you’ve never met before showed up claiming to be your best friend from another life?”

Eddie laughs, really laughs, and Buck finds himself smiling too. On retrospect, he kinda wishes he had searched him out, just to have another ridiculous scenario to tell him about now.

“No, that’s- that’s true,” Eddie shakes his head, still smiling. “Probably would’ve dragged you to the nearest psych ward. Still…” he trails off.

“Still what?”

“I don’t know,” he shrugs. “I feel bad for that Eddie. Sounds like he could’ve used a Buck in his life.”

Buck is past feeling guilty for leaving those subconscious versions of his family behind (except for Chris, he’s never getting over that one), but he’d be lying if he said he hasn’t been running through scenarios in his head, wondering what could’ve happened if he’d stayed. (Aside from, obviously, being dead and all that).

“Yeah, I guess so,” he sighs sipping his beer. “Still, I don’t know how much I could’ve helped. I mean, of course, I would’ve tried to help you- him get Chris back. But I’m not sure how that’d work without the whole legal guardian thing, you know? I mean, m- maybe I could’ve found Ca-“

The cushion hits him square in the face and nearly makes him spill his beer.

“Hey! What’s that about?! I’m convalescent here!”

“That’s not what I meant."

“No?”

“No!” Eddie rolls his eyes, exasperated for some reason Buck doesn’t understand. “I mean… yeah, if I was in that position, of course, I’d want help getting my son back. But that’s not it…”

Buck scratches the back of his head, squinting at Eddie like it’ll somehow help him read between the lines of whatever he’s trying to say.

“Then what is it?”

“I just-“ Eddie stumbles with his words and sighs. “I just meant... it sounds like he could use a friend.”

What good would that do?

Buck doesn’t say it, but his face must betray the thought by the way Eddie’s mouth twists with annoyance.

“Buck, all your help with Chris, introducing us to Carla, you being part of his life, helping me raise him… of course, it means a lot. I don’t think I could’ve done this without you.”

“But?” He prompts.

“But,” Eddie says slowly, looking him in the eye, “that’s not all that matters. I mean, you’re my best friend, man. Even without all that, I’d want to be friends with you, hang out, laugh, do shit all on a Sunday night. That matters too.”

Just being Buck.

“Oh.”

Eddie looks away, takes two big gulps of beer, like they can wash down the emotional weight of what he’s trying to explain.

“I’m just saying,” he says, eyes still on the game they are both ignoring. “If I was going through that, it sounds like hell… I’d want a friend like you by my side. You’re a very good friend.”

Buck ducks his head to hide the heat of blood rushing through his entire face. “Uh, well, thanks… I- uh, I appreciate it. You’re a great friend too.”

He tries to picture Eddie without him. Tries to picture himself without Eddie. Both options seem impossible.

“Well, good thing we met," he decides with a grin, raising his beer lightly against Eddie's.

"Good thing you didn't die," Eddie says, and though he tries to hide it behind a sip of his beer and a distant look at the tv, Buck can feel the heaviness hidden behind that sentence. It only hits him at that moment... Eddie was maybe a little too close to finding out exactly what his life without Buck would be like. "I mean," he goes on with a shrug, "sucks for that other Eddie, but I'm not much of the sharing type. So I'm glad you came back."

"Of course," Buck smiles, trying to match the false lightness in his tone. "You're stuck with me."

"Good," Eddie nods a single time like the matter's settled. "But I'd rather not be stuck with this couch."

"It's so uncomfortable!" Buck chuckles, glad that someone finally brought it up.

"So uncomfortable!" Eddie agrees, finally meeting his eyes.

"My mom's always had the worst taste in furniture."

"Oh, so it runs in the family."

"Hey!" Buck pretends to be offended and throws the cushion back at his smug grinning face.

He misses by quite a bit (something to worry about later). Instead, the cushion knocks the beer bottle clean out of Eddie's hand and spills the dark liquid all over the couch's white fabric.

Buck and Eddie look at the growing stain. They stare at each other, silent, frozen with the sudden panic of two little kids about to be reprimanded by a grown-up. Except, there are no parents here...

...just two grown men who burst out laughing at the exact same time, bent over in a fit of giggles so loud that it drowns out the game's final touchdown. Not that anybody was watching, anyway.

#buddie #eddie diaz #evan buck buckley #911 fox #911 spoilers #i just want them to be happy and laugh together ok?#911 fic

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starlingflight · 7 months ago

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Hiiii!

I just wanted to butt in and say how much I love your hinny fanfics especially the once’s set in hbp. (I’m not going to say how many times I have reread them, it’s too embarrassing 🙈) The way you write them, the banter and chemistry!! Honestly sometimes it feels like I’m eavesdropping on someone else conversation because you make them seem so real. I love the pinning. :)

It’s fun to read about how tortured harry is and how he feels ‘normal’ and not under so much pressure when Ginny is around! I have a suggestion if you don’t mind (ignore this otherwise and accept my apology <3). I would love to read something you about Harry pinning over Ginny while she is with Dean and see his thoughts. The monster in his chest! I love reading about the early stages of their relationship it’s so cute! Or something like that

I hope you have a wonderful day and I hope you know that your writing is spectacular!!

Hi anon!

First of all, thank you so, so, so much for this! It literally made my day! The idea that anyone re-reads my fics makes me so happy, I can't even explain 🥺🥺🥺

And now I fear I must disappoint you 😭 I've tried writing this prompt three different ways, and I can't make it work… I very rarely explore Ginny's relationship with Dean until they're broken up and there's a reason for that (I hope you're ready for some less than complimentary takes about my two faves): Both Harry and Ginny use Dean as a coping mechanism.

Ginny stays with Dean way longer than she should, to an extent it's almost out of character for her. Why? In my opinion, because if she breaks up with Dean, she has to deal with something that's increasingly staring her in the face, the fact that Harry likes her, and despite all the work she's done on herself, she still wants to drop everything to be with him. It's an uncomfortable realisation for someone as independent as Ginny.

The sheer force of her feelings for Harry is a lot for her to accept, and it's easier for her to just stay with Dean who, while nice, inspires no such depth of emotion. It's not fair to Dean, but it's a self-preservation tactic that Ginny appears to be subconsciously committed to throughout HBP.

Now, onto the reason I'm struggling to write your lovely (and appreciated) request. Harry James Potter, number 1 avoider of emotions, actually finds the Dean relationship very convenient tbh. Do you know who doesn't have to deal with their ever-increasing feelings for their best friend's little sister? The guy whose best friend's little sister has a boyfriend.

There's a large section of HBP after Harry sees the Dinny kiss (and the chest monster is born), where Ginny lingers at the back of Harry's mind (and in his dreams) but he never really consciously dwells on his feelings for Ginny. Harry isn't ready to face it, and he doesn't have to because Ginny has a boyfriend.

It's only when Ginny and Dean break up that Harry starts to panic, not that Ginny won't reciprocate his feelings, only that Ron will be mad. It's one of the reasons I love hinny as a couple… on some level they both know. Even when neither of them want to haha.

Harry never views Dean as an obstacle in canon, because really he's not (sorry Dean, I still love you). I think he probably had very fleeting moments of envy (I wrote about Harry not liking Ginny wearing Dean's West Ham jumper 😅), but I don't think Harry believes for a moment that Dean is competition (I did write him having a little crisis of confidence about Dean post sectumsempra incident in FAIY, but that's really just Harry looking for ways to make himself feel bad because of his guilt). Dean is just a convenient reason for Harry not to deal with a messy emotional situation.

Really, is it any wonder Dean smashes that glass?

Anyway, apologies for the essay, I do really appreciate being sent prompts and I wish I could fulfil this one to your satisfaction! I hope someone with a slightly different hinny interpretation than me might be inspired by it ❤️❤️❤️

#anon #answered asks #harry potter #ginny weasley #dean thomas #hinny #dinny

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ldysmfrst · 2 months ago

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I Got Interviewed!

Hello, dearest readers,

I had the honor of being interviewed by @psychosupernatural!

You may have seen the ask that was sent to my inbox.

After a mini-freak out for being asked in the first place, I agreed.

They also permitted me to share the interview with my readers!

I don't want to sound self-centered by sharing this with you.

I just thought that if someone was interested in knowing (even if it was for school), maybe others might want to know as well.

So here you go!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

What’s your motivation for writing fanfiction?

I started my first story, ‘Breaking and Entering,’ for myself because it was the first winter after COVID-19 broke out, and the world was shut off from itself. Then, after reading fanfics for the first time, I started writing my second story (Reciprocal Synergy) and stopped after no one paid any attention to it when I posted it on Tumblr and AO3. After reading a fantastic story by @yoongiofmine, I was inspired to write American Mate—A BTS Hybrid Playmate AU. I was initially going to keep it to myself because the online world had already shot down one of my stories, so why do it again? My oldest child (15 years old) said, “So what? Do it for yourself.” And I did.

I tell newer or struggling veteran writers, “Write for yourself. Enjoy what you wrote. Somewhere out there, someone else will match your freak. Someone else will want to escape into your world. Someone else needs to feel that support, even from a character in a story on their electronic device.” At this point, it's like an inner mantra.

How have you learned to write good fanfiction?

First, it is still being determined whether my fanfiction is good. Like all works of art and creativity, what I do may not be everyone’s cup of tea. The fanfic that I write takes a lot of time to cultivate. Most of my time is spent researching anything from sciences and behaviors to interviews and documentaries. The ability to tie facts into my works is what I think sets me into a category that draws in others because it makes it subconsciously believable despite the characters being werewolves, hybrids, aliens, or soul mates with abilities. I also use my American Sign Language and Psychology education to help build these miniature universes. When I write, I consider the characters' psychological aspects, internal processes, and non-verbal communication. For works that also include animalistic tendencies, I research that to the furthest of my ability. I have done it so frequently that my city's large animal and exotic animal veterinarian has helped me several times. This can make the writing good if the readers want to read it.

How do you judge the quality of your fics?

Quality requires consistency and continuity. If side notes, footnotes, or character reference sheets are not used to ensure a solid foundation in the story, the reader will be confused. That confusion, that difficulty to read fluidly, is where the quality lies. I could have a fantastic idea, but if it is not easy to read, no one will read it. As for the wording, grammar, and the like, I practically failed every English class. My degrees are very much fact-based research papers written in MLA and APA. Due to my horrible history with writing, I never had the guts to take something like a creative writing course, although I have had a poem published worldwide. When I read something I have written, if it pulls me back into the story and makes me want to read on and keep writing, it has good enough quality to show others.

How did you / do you learn the “rules” and conventions of fanfiction?

I don’t think I have to be honest. There are common boundaries of respect, such as placing warnings, indicating where adult themes start and end, and noting where influences have come from. As a writer, I follow these out of a desire not to shock or trigger my reader and to support other fanfic writers. I have been the reader who started reading an out-of-this-world fanfic and was thrown into a panic attack because there was no warning. I ended up messaging that writer and letting them know they have a trigger in their story. That writer was shocked that the story was triggering. When I explained that it was gracing the edge of being a particular type of fanfic, yandere, and how it was doing that, the writer understood and updated the warnings. Unfortunately, fanfics do not have a predetermined set of rules that everyone is made aware of before starting their fanfic writing journey. It is a game of mimicking with individualizations sprinkled in. Also, as a writer, you have to be able to take in the thoughts of your readers and make adjustments without taking offense to that feedback.

Do you tend to stick to only one fandom, or do you migrate from one fandom to another?

I migrate fandoms. My first fanfic was ‘Breaking and Entering,’ an original Young Adult high school werewolf story. I started writing it because I was bored while having COVID. One of my most popular fanfics, American Mate, was inspired oddly. I read a BTS fanfic written by Yoongieofmine. The Playmate AU aspect of her story caught my attention because BTS is not among the top K–pop groups I follow. However, that story made my mind run with the thoughts of combining Playmates with Hybrids. I ended up writing Yoongieofmine and asking permission to write ‘American Mate.’ I have also written for other K-pop groups, Ateez and Stray Kids, and a Thai Boy-Love Drama, KinnPorsche.

What sort of relationship exists between you as a writer and the characters that you create on the page?

Interesting question, to be honest or not… All of my stories, except the werewolf ‘Breaking and Entering’ story, are written in a y/n style, meaning the main character is the reader. These stories are written to pull the reader into them by negating a leading character name and replacing it with the notation y/n = your name. I have to put myself in that leading character role to write these stories. I fully understand that the stories are just that– stories. None of what is written is in any way possible. Still, while the reader or I read the story, I do my best to immerse myself in the place of the leading character and have those relationships, experiences, trials, and fears with the other characters. Each chapter that is written starts as a dream or fantasy that I have personally had. Those give me an outline to work with, but I have had the experience where I am so into and connected with the characters that when I stop writing, I think, “wait, what happened?” So, I have to go back to read over what I have written, and then it's a moment of “Oh!! That is what I wrote. Well, that came out of nowhere.” Simply, I have a connection with them because I don’t think I could write them if I didn’t; however, I am not delusional enough to think they are anything more than words on a page.

LdySmFrst Library Link

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alaynestone · 11 months ago

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oh, would you tell us a little more about that repressed transfem dean headcanon and how you think it would play out?

i've been thinking about how to respond to this. ultimately, i think not much needs to change just the way certain aspects of his character are interpreted. it's not my default headcanon, but there is a strong basis for it.

as much as dean reads as both bisexual and definitely some kind of not cis, i don't think he particularly cares about labels or being "out".

dean's character is always defined by a certain fluidity. 6 episodes in he's not only directly paralleled to the shapeshifter but the shapeshifter assumes dean's shape and gives voice to dean's thoughts without permission. and we get the glorious body horror and eroticism of the scene where the shapeshifter strips dean's skin off as (i just wanna be) mary by the death riders plays in the netflix version. dean has no fixed shape.

right from the pilot it's clear he goes through life performing, mirroring, playing into expectations good and bad, clinging to a semblance of agency at every turn. dean winchester might as well be a bigger than life character dean has constructed to survive. now does that mean every aspect of that performance is a lie? no, not really. however his masculinity does conceal and protect many of the more vulnerable facets of his personality until they too are useful. he doesn't so much kill or repress his femininity but it too can only be expressed when it's in service to something else. he can't just exist and want these things. and it's a source of shame that he wants them.

not only is he (at least) subconsciously treated as daughter, wife and mother, there is plenty of evidence he doesn't perceive himself as entirely male. to get more specific, it'd be one thing if he wore lingerie to please someone else, but to admit that he liked it, that he personally enjoyed it even with the ways feminization has been used against him? that it's more than kink? that is terrifying.

so i do think sex is the best way to get him to explore this aspect of his identity at an early stage. putting it into words is much harder than going there physically with the promise of orgasms. i'm pretty obsessed with the idea of sam suspecting these things about dean and trying to make him feel more comfortable about it. there is no way he wouldn't feel honored to be trusted with this and protective/possessive at the thought of dean seeking it anywhere else. even as they continue to explore this, i don't think dean would require a change of pronouns, or start going by deanna. but he would feel so warm and right inside whenever sam called him his girl. something inside him would heal the more this vocabulary was used outside the bedroom. it would take a lot of work and there are plenty of ways this could backfire but i believe in them. i'm a sap, whatever.

#dean being known entirely by sam and there being no more secrets between them gets me like nothing else #sam would be so serious about it #i love that the show serves us so much dean gender stuff on a platter plus an actual panty kink #if only fandom was more interested in exploring all this especially in the context of the s/d relationship #wincest #anon if you aren't a wincest person i'm sorry and ignore the last paragraph!!

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that-left-turn · 1 year ago

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Some thoughts on "inappropriate language"

I'm barely in fandom, so I don't have a horse in this race. I don't know the people of the different factions, so this is an outside perspective on the recap that was posted last Sunday and the subsequent reactions to the criticism leveled at it for "inappropriate language." I haven't read any recaps for DD and my knowledge of this one comes from seeing a screenshot of the original version.

The comparison used in the recap is racist and this is how institutionalized racism works. Someone says something, others don't think it's so bad (and that mostly happens when they aren't personally affected by it). If you like a person, you'll excuse things they say which you shouldn't (eg. both Steven Yeun and Norman Reedus have friends who don't see anything wrong with a little rape joke now and again). This is particularly the case if the accusation against your friend comes from someone you don't like. To an extent, that's human, but friends should call each other on their shit because who else will help you become the best version of yourself? The motives of the other cliques/factions shouldn't matter because, regardless of the fandom shit slinging, they're not wrong in that the remark was racist.

I have no idea what the writer's intentions were or how she felt before or after being called upon to change the problematic wording. I do know that she isn't American and since there are cultural parameters to racism, she might be ignorant of the why and how the remark was a textbook example of US institutionalized racism, but her editor and the person responsible for the review site would both have cleared the recap for posting. Why wasn't this caught? Three people were apparently completely blind to the use of "inappropriate language" and if I were to guess they share a similar privilege—we mostly don't notice the sly little barbs that aren't aimed at our own demographic.

When the racist wording was finally changed, Caryl fans were outraged at the consequences and showed support for the use of clearly "inappropriate language." Racism affects us all on subconscious levels, not only the person directly impacted by it. Rap music isn't a criminal subculture, but painting it as such perpetuates that impression of it for individuals with limited exposure to rap and/or black people. It grows and gives way to "black people are thugs." American sociopolitical issues are grounded in a history of oppression, exclusion and violence, and it's why we have a school-to-prison pipeline in this country as well as police brutality. When we have the privilege of not being affected by something, we forgive each other's slips. "I know this person. She isn't racist. She just said something unfortunate. It was a poor choice of words." Black people get killed in the US because others unwittingly perpetuate prejudices and stereotypes.

I want to be clear that I'm NOT saying the writer of the recap is a racist. I haven't talked to her about this. I don't know what she's thinking. My problem with the apology is that it was a standard white person apology where the issue was skirted around—it's worse to be called a racist than to acknowledge that you've said something racist. If you're sorry for hurting someone, you accept responsibility for that hurt. "The language I used was inappropriate because it's racist." There's no shame in admitting you messed up, that you were ignorant of something; it's taking responsibility for your actions and there's a strength of character in that.

We all say dumb, thoughtless things at times and we need to get better at talking about racism without getting defensive. "Be kind to each other" includes listening to the people who've been hurt by what's been said, even if you don't like them. There are other Carylers of color, who don't belong to the factions of fandom that you don't like and by saying, "there was nothing wrong with the recap," you've just told them that they're not worthy of human consideration, or your compassion. The fandom is already toxic, why do we have to invalidate other Caryl fans' experiences?

My DMs are open and so are my asks (for any anons) if anyone wants to talk. I've spent two days debating whether I wanted to post and I fully expect to be drummed out of the fandom for it. But, I figured someone who isn't part of any of the drama needed to say that the language was problematic—nobody was imagining it or making a willful interpretation. I wish the aftermath had been handled differently and I wish I didn't feel so sad and disillusioned by it. I've spent two days feeling brokenhearted over everybody's rush to defend the use of "inappropriate language."

Thanks for taking the time to read my thoughts on why what happened was hurtful. I hope your takeaway is something other than anger.

#caryl fandom #caryl #name that -ism

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