#and I didn’t mind classes that lasted until 8pm

[chipper-smol]

Capitalism shure will make you feel guilty about wanting to work on a later schedule than 8 to 5

[rinhaler]

We Groove and We Dance

CHAPTER SUMMARY: After Megumi destroyed your art coursework, you decide to skip class the following day and start fresh. But Yuuji invites you to a paint party you can't resist. Hopefully nothing goes wrong!

boyfriend!yuuji itadori x f!reader x bully!megumi fushiguro

WARNINGS : 18+, dubcon/noncon, consensual dry humping, bullying, fingering, drugging, choking, degradation, bladder failure (NOT piss kink), vomiting, marking??? clubbing, choking.

WORDS : 5.7k

notes : damn megumi's kind of a dick huh asdfghjhgf

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You didn’t dare utter a word when you got into Yuuji’s car. It was just as well, really, because he kept blathering on about his class. Apparently one of his classmates took a huge fall while jumping hurdles. It was embarrassing for the boy, but hilarious for all of those who witnessed.

Normally you’d be laughing with Yuuji. His laugh is so contagious, and his smile is the type that could make you smile too, no matter how upset or angry you were. But not today. Today your heart is thumping, if not for the music Yuuji is blaring in the car, you’re certain he would have heard the sound of your vital organ pounding against your ribcage. Your eyes are hollow. All you could do was face forward out of the front window and hope to get home as soon as possible. You keep replaying the moment that made you temporarily mute over and over in your mind. That wasn’t you. You’ve never felt that way before. Pure, unadulterated hatred. The way you destroyed Megumi’s sketchbook wasn’t normal. The insane laughter that followed wasn’t normal either. It’s like he broke you. Is that his plan?

Is Megumi Fushiguro trying to break you?

The first word you spoke to Yuuji since you stepped into his car was a sharp ‘no!’ after he asked if you wanted to get a McDonald’s before you headed home.

All you want is the comfort and safety of your house. You want to lock yourself away and forget every single thing that happened today.

As soon as you step foot inside, you slam the door behind you and lock it instantly. Your boyfriend turns to face you with a raised brow, he knows something is going on and he isn’t the type to ignore his intuition. But instead of questioning you, he pulls you closer to him by your wrist and gently kissed at your neck. His sweet lips were tickling you and even in your terrified state you couldn’t help but giggle.

“Do you wanna talk about it baby?” he asks you.

“I don’t think I should…” you whimper, nuzzling yourself into his chest.

He squeezes you tighter, closer to his body. Repeatedly smothering the crown of your head in quick, loving kisses.

“Do you wanna sit on my face while you talk about it?” he teases, kissing you again as he waited for your answer. You’re pretty sure it was a joke, but you know how much Yuuji loves eating you out, so if you actually wanted to do that, he’d be more than happy to oblige. You softly push him away and fake-punch his arm.

“Not today.” you speak, turning away from him to go into your bedroom.

What you do want, is a nap.

You don’t even have the energy to put any pyjamas on. After getting yourself down to your panties and bare chest, you collapse on top of your mattress and curl into a ball. Yuuji follows you into the bedroom, he didn’t pressure you to talk, but he rests his hand on your shoulder as your body rises and falls while you sob silently.

“I hate seeing you like this, try and get some sleep. Okay?” he tells you, you can’t answer with words. But you nod in agreement. “Do you want me to get you anything?” he wonders. You shake your head in response. He leans over to kiss your cheek. He stays with you for a while, until he's sure you’ve drifted off. It didn’t take too long for the pressure of the day and your crying to knock you out into a heavy nap.

You needed this.

You really needed this.

Three hours.

You napped for three hours.

You wake up at 8pm, confused and agitated. You were slightly irritated that Yuuji didn’t wake you, because you knew you wouldn’t be able to sleep tonight now that you’ve slept to such a ridiculous time. When you get out of bed, you pull on one of Yuuji’s old t-shirts and leave your room to find him.

But you can’t be mad.

You couldn’t be mad at him after you told him you didn’t need anything, but he went to the store anyway. He was sitting comfortably on the sofa, eyes drooped, clearly bored of whatever he is watching on the TV. In front of him is a spread-out selection of chocolate, crisps, biscuits and gummy sweets. His eyes widen when he notices you, and that trademark smile of his sprawls across his face.

“I didn’t know what to get, so I got all of your favourites.” he tells you as he rubs the back of his neck awkwardly. Tears began to prick at your eyes. It had been a hard, draining day. And yet, even without telling him a single thing he managed to brighten your mood. “I rented The Shining too, it’s your favourite right?”

“Right.” you earnestly smile, completely touched that he went to so much effort for you.

“Even though you get scared every single time we’ve watched it together.” he taunts playfully, he begins to pat the space beside him on the sofa inviting you to sit down.

“Don’t poke fun, it’s not my fault Jack Nicholson is such a convincing actor! He’s amazing and—”

“Yeah yeah, save it for the movie princess. You can do your own commentary you’ve seen it so many times.” he interrupts before you could finish your sentence. He was right though. You could talk about the film the entire time about what you like about it and little tidbits you knew.

And he’d let you.

He’d let you and he’d smile while you did it.

The amount of snacks you consumed is criminal. You actually think you might die or explode at any minute. Yuuji ate even more than you did, and you couldn’t believe he was fine. You don’t know where he puts it, you’d be impressed if you didn’t feel so violently sick from over consumption. The movie ends, but you couldn’t be bothered to move from your cosy spot. You’d gotten yourself comfortable, nestled into Yuuji’s chest while he held an arm around you.

A squeal rips from your chest as Yuuji picks you up in his arms bridal style. You forget how strong he is. The way he holds you makes you feel like you weigh nothing at all. It was disappointing that he didn’t carry you all of the way to bed. Instead, he dropped you off in the bathroom. He wetted your toothbrush for you and put on some toothpaste before he did the same for himself. You were grateful, because of the lack of energy you had you knew you wouldn’t have done it otherwise. You’re looking at each other as you brush in the mirror above the sink. Foam forming in both of your mouths. After you both spit, he pokes harshly at your chest. You pull the fabric assuming he means you dribbled a bit. But when you’re at your most vulnerable he takes the opportunity to lift his finger and flick your nose. You try to begin playfighting with him; but he instantly grabs your wrists and throws you over his shoulder.

“Nice try.” he laughs.

Yuuji opens the bedroom window as far as it’ll go before turning on the fan he bought for the room. The heat is unbearable, and the fact you were both full of food wasn’t helping matters either. He lay on his back while you turn away from him facing the window. He slips a hand up the back of your shirt and began to delicately trace with his fingers, knowing the tickling sensation helps you sleep.

You pluck up the courage to tell Yuuji an idea you’ve had before you drift off to sleep for the night.

“I’m not going to uni tomorrow.” you tell him bluntly.

There’s an uncomfortable silence. It’s a beat of silence that’s somehow filled with a boisterous amount of noise that makes your stomach churn. There’s not a word spoken. But you can hear the irritation in your boyfriend’s throat as he coughs to clear it. You can feel the way his relaxed face tenses and contracts as a scowl forms. It’s impossible to miss the furrowing of his brows, the squinting of his eyes or the clenching of his teeth.

“Fushiguro said something to you, didn’t he?” he almost grunts.

It's so easy to love Yuuji. It's so easy to be hopelessly in love with him, because he just knows you. It’s not even been a year since you began dating but he can read you like a book. You should have known, really, because he’s always like this. He knows how to read between the lines and know exactly what you mean. Anyone else would assume you were just skipping, taking some personal time off to be lazy and lounge around. But not Yuuji. Because he really knows you. He knows that you don’t take time off unless you absolutely have to. He had to battle with you to stay home around Christmas time when you caught a winter cold.

So what other reason would you want to stay home other than Megumi Fushiguro?

“Tell me what he said.” he demands. You could feel him burning holes into the back of your head as he awaits an answer.

“He didn’t—”

“Don’t lie to me. Don’t cover for him. You need to tell me, now.” he says as his volume increased. It scares you a little. He’s never been angry with you before, so he’s never had any reason to raise his voice or yell. But you know he isn’t angry with you, he’s angry at him.

“Please. Yuuji please I don’t want to talk about it. I promise he didn’t do anything I just,” you pause, feeling the tears well in your eyes again while you thought about it. You couldn’t stand Megumi. You couldn’t stand that he was making you lie to your boyfriend for the first time ever. It wasn’t like you were planning on keeping it to yourself forever. You just needed a plan. You needed time to think. “It wasn’t his fault, really, it was mine. He was showing me some ink and I spilled it all over my sketchbook and ruined everything. I’m just a little stressed since I’m gonna have to start all over. I just… I need tomorrow to myself to try and make a new body of work.”

He's silent again. You can hear him breathing heavily, he’d wound himself up thinking about Megumi upsetting you. He's trying to steel himself so he doesn’t snap. His resolve and agitation crumble when you rolled over to face him. Your big teary doe eyes staring up at him so innocently, he couldn’t stay mad when you were like this.

“I know you’re lying to me.” he speaks.

“’m not!”

“Stop it,” he snaps a little, shutting his eyes to compose himself again. “I’m not gonna pressure you to talk to me. If you’re hellbent on covering for him that’s on you. Take the day off, I’ll keep out of his way. But please, please baby, talk to me and tell the truth when you’re ready.” he tells you.

It broke your heart a little when he rolled away from you. In the nine months you’ve been together, he’s never forgotten to kiss you goodnight. He wasn’t forgetting to do it now. He wasn’t kissing you on purpose.

He really is mad at you.

“… Yuuji, I love you.”

“I love you.”

It still stung how your night ended with Yuuji. It was killing you knowing that you really had upset him and made him so cross with you.

You wake up at 6am, your jagged sleep from your ill-timed nap made you groggy and exhausted. When your eyes open, you turn to see Yuuji with his arm wrapped around your waist. Like he couldn’t resist you.

You free yourself from his hold, leaving the bedroom and heading for the kitchen to get yourself some breakfast. You didn’t have the energy to find something to watch while you scarf down your cereal, so you turn on the first morning breakfast show you came across. You don’t care about a single thing they're talking about; it's like white noise while you crunch away.

You wash your bowl when you finished, instantly finding a new sketchbook in the cupboard you bought for your next project. You’d have to remember to buy another new one for next semester. You're exhausted, completely drained and miserable. Anything you produce will probably pale in comparison to your original book, but there's no time to waste and you need a head start on your absent day.

Yuuji got up two hours later. Lazily wandering around as he dresses himself and gathers everything he needs for his class. He says a quick goodbye before grabbing onto the door handle to leave.

“Don’t I get a kiss?” you ask. You feel absolutely pathetic. You never thought you’d be the type of girl to be so needy and crave validation from your partner. But he’s never been like this with you before. He’s always been so affectionate and loving with you, so this new side of him made you insecure and uncomfortable.

But ever the perfect boyfriend, he approaches you to give you the kiss you so desperately desire. It's quick with not much passion behind it. He gives you a half-hearted smile before getting up to leave again.

“I love you.” you tell him.

He halts his actions when he hears your voice break. Tears threatening to break free from your eyes yet again. He comes back closer to you, giving you a romantic, passionate kiss against your yearning lips. Yuuji pulls away to kiss your forehead, before looking intently into your sodden eyes.

“Baby. I love you. So. Much.” he insists, it's all he needs to say to reassure you. Your heart pounds as the tears break free from your eyes. It's a relief. He waves goodbye before he finally leaves.

You have the whole entire day to yourself. And you're spending every single hour from now until bedtime painting and getting your sketchbook up to scratch. And now that Yuuji isn’t mad (or at least as mad) at you anymore, you feel confident you can do this.

When 2pm comes around, you feel ravenous. The hunger pangs you’ve been furiously trying to ignore are becoming unbearable. You ordered takeout so that you wouldn’t have to waste time cooking that you could be spending painting. You were working up to the very last minute until the doorbell rang. You hold your paintbrush between your teeth as you answer, warranting a very awkward look from the delivery boy. You kick the door closed with the back of your foot, instantly diving into the pizza box to satiate your starvation.

You moan loudly as soon as the dough and cheese combination hit your tongue, the taste makes you consider whether you prefer the flavour of the food or sex with your boyfriend.

It's a consideration you’d be keeping to yourself.

– ping –

You just about die when the notification comes through on your phone. It's only a text from Yuuji. You open it quickly, it's a link to a Facebook event. It was bright and colourful, quite contrasting to the club it was associated with.

PAINT PARTY @ INDEPENDENT

­You scroll down to see that Yuuji has added both of your names to the guest list.

YUUJI: I know ur busy with ur coursework, but maybe? It’s tonight only. x

You don’t reply instantly. It’s been a while since you’ve been to Independent, or Indie as it’s more commonly known amongst students. It’s your favourite club. It’s a little dingy but it’s huge and the drinks are cheap. It’s favoured amongst students since the first and second floors have different vibes. The main room downstairs plays old school R&B and hip-hop, whereas upstairs has a smaller room that plays indie music. They have a special blue and pink drink you can’t get anywhere else. You know a girl who has the signature drink tattooed on her body, so she gets free entry for life. Your phone pings again when you take a little while to reply.

YUUJI: We don’t have to go. But it’s been a while since we went, and we always have fun! x

YOU: No ur right. Lets go!! xx🥰

It’s embarrassing to be honest, how quickly your determined resolve crumbles. You internally mock yourself as you get ready for the paint party.

'I’m gonna work all day until bedtime.' Pfft.

You decide to slick your hair back, it’s glamourous and easy which is best since it’ll likely be covered in paint before the nights out.

You hear the door slam and Yuuji instantly rushes towards the bathroom. He slams the door after himself, but rushes instantly back out to come and greet you.

“Hi,” he kisses your cheek, panting from being so energetic around the house. “this came for you, looks like it’s from your parents.” he tells you, dropping a letter in front of you before rushing back to the bathroom.

Your vision drops to the letter in front of you. It’s got your mother’s dainty elegant handwriting on the front and your stomach churns as you flip to see a gorgeous pink wax seal with your family crest on the front.

Not today. This is a problem for tomorrow me.

Once you’ve finished with your hair, you apply a quick helping of gloss and other finishing touches to your makeup. You opt to don a pair of old jeans and a plain white t-shirt. You’re not willing to sacrifice your gorgeous wardrobe for the sake of a paint party. Part of you worries that you’ll look out of place and like you haven’t made an effort, but you’re sure everyone else attending will likely have had the same idea.

Yuuji steps out of the shower, a towel wrapped around his waist and abs glistening from the water trickling down his body. Your heart is pounding. He looks good enough to eat and he smirks when he clocks that you’re ogling him. You get out of your dressing table seat and approach him. He’s wise to you though, because as soon as you reach to unravel his towel, he grabs your wrist and tuts.

“I just showered princess.”

“But—”

“You’re so cute when you’re needy. Are you wet? Look at ya, squirming around like that f’me.” he continues to tease, pushing you backwards so you fall backwards onto the bed with him on top of you. Both of your hands are pinned above your head with one of his. Your chest is heaving. You need him. And you need him now.

You start to grind on his thigh slowly, trying to ease the tension building between your thighs. A cheeky grin finds it’s way on his face as he’s amused by how desperate you’re acting, your cunt longing to feel him inside of you. He starts to move his thigh to help you, but stops as soon as he starts, knowing that you shouldn’t

“Please, Yuuji please. Just a quickie, I’ll do the work.” you beg pitifully, bucking your hips quicker so you gain some more friction against your core.

“No baby. Maybe when we get home,” he said with a wicked smile on his face, “we always have great drunk sex, don’t we?”

There’s a line outside of the club as you step out of the cab. But that is the line for people who came to the club without putting their names on the Facebook guest list. Yuuji takes your hand as he guides you up to the stamp lady sitting in the booth, telling her both of your names. He’s such a gentleman, he even pays the fee for the pair of you to get in. She instantly finds you both and stamps your hands so you can go inside. Your eyes glimmer as both yours and Yuji’s white t-shirts illuminate under the UV lights once you get inside.

He noticed you were feeling a little insecure over your outfit choice, so he copied you.

White t-shirt and jeans.

You needn’t have worried though, your suspicions were correct. Everyone else in the club seems to have a similar idea to dress simpler rather than going all out. Some people were dressed more scantily than others, but it was all in good fun.

There are members of staff on the balconies above your head. They have enormous plastic guns in their hands that they're shooting down into the crowd. The bright colours make instant contact with you and your boyfriend, and he turns to face you when he hears you squeal and laugh over the pounding bass.

“Let’s get a drink.” he shouts in your ear so that you could hear him. You nod as you let him lead you through the crowd and to the bar.

The bar area is a lot more deserted. There are a few groups sitting in booths and others on bar stools waiting for their drinks. You order the pink and blue special, while Yuuji opted to get himself a bottle of beer.

You’re sure he’ll be switching to pints later as the night goes on.

You notice an odd-looking boy with black hair approach your partner. He taps him on the shoulder, but Yuuji doesn’t notice. You tap him instead, and when he faces you, you nod in the direction of the boy.

“Junpei!” your boyfriend exclaims as he engulfs his friend in a hug. They exchange pleasantries and Yuuji introduces you to his friend. “I didn’t think this was your thing Junpei, nice to see ya.” he smiles happily.

“I got invited and saw your name on the guest list and thought why not! It’s been a while.” he explains.

You’re told that they were friends in high school, but Junpei went to a different university to study psychology. You stand up to leave, telling Yuuji you need the bathroom.

“I’ll come with you.” he says as he stands up to follow you, but you stop him.

“I’ll be fine Yuuji! Junpei, keep him out of trouble while I’m gone.” you joke, making everyone smile hard enough to form apples in their cheeks.

You wade through the crowds again, getting doused in paint as you do. All of the colours and mess are so pretty, the people in the crowd look amazing and it’s making you so giddy to be part of such an electric atmosphere.

When you reach the top of the stairs, your heart stops as you see a familiar head of uncontrollable black hair outside of the toilets. You’re instantly regretting not telling Yuuji to accompany you.

It’s Fushiguro.

He’s got a girl pinned against the wall, his face is covering hers, but you can hear her moaning. You realise outside of his pretty exterior he has no class or manners, which you probably should have known sooner. But seeing him publicly finger a girl outside of some club toilets is the icing on the cake.

She’s insatiable, her fingers don’t know where to settle. You see them travel through his hair, on his arm, his waist. She’s got to be faking it. She’s being impossibly loud and irritating. You attempt to back away slowly, before he can notice you. But the fraction of a second he decides to observe his surroundings, he sees you. He whispers something in the girls ear before she rushes away down the other side of the corridor. He sticks his two fingers in his mouth and sensually sucks the strangers juices as he approaches you. You try to turn and run but he’s faster than you. Grabbing your wrist with his free hand and slamming you against the wall.

He hikes up your leg to rest on his hip, and he’s grinding into you with his face burrowed into your neck. Your voice has been stolen from you and you’re frozen once again. You know he’s not trying to seduce you or fuck you. He’s putting on a show for everyone standing close by. Because while people will think you’re a ravenous young couple dry humping in public, while people will think he’s kissing your neck, he’s whispering obscenities in your ear.

“I missed you in class today.” he begins, his left hand travelling to settle on your raised hip. “That was a clever fucking present you left in my sketchbook sweetheart.” he grimaces, clearly losing his cool as he relives the discovery of his ruined art.

“I’m sorr—”

“Shut. Up.” he spits, silencing you completely. “I had you down for a pussy. I didn’t think you’d fight back, and it was only fair after all. An eye for an eye.” he tells you a little more calmly. You’re still terrified. He smiles menacingly when he can feel you trembling under his grip.

“Please let go.” you whimper.

He rests his forehead against yours, his eyes are filled with malice. They’re bloodshot and furious. His smile bares almost every single tooth in his mouth as each corner stretches as close to his ears as possible. He moves both of his hands, wrapping each of them around your neck. And squeezes tight.

“I don’t like playing fair. You cunt. Did you really think I was going to let you get away with that?” he snaps. You were clawing at his hands, but it did no good. Tears began to stream down your face from the lack of oxygen, desperately trying to take some in.

“I can’t- breathe, Meg- umi- can’t,” you struggle, hoping he’d take pity on you. His jaw bubbles slightly as he held eye contact with you, and let you go with a flourish.

You fell to the ground, taking in screeching inhales as you held your tremoring fingers around your swollen throat. Without looking you could already feel the black and blue blemishes discolouring your sensitive neck. He looms over your defenceless frame as you try to recover.

He isn’t smiling.

He isn’t angry.

If not for what he just did, he’d just be Megumi the moody new boy. It was alarming to you how quickly he could turn it on and off. He turns his back to you and heads down the opposite end of the corridor. You take your opportunity to scurry to your feet and rush back to your boyfriend.

The time was creeping up to 2:30am. You managed to calm down before you joined with Yuuji and Junpei so he didn’t suspect a thing.

It's calmer with him, you know you're safe with his arm wrapped around your shoulder as he converses with Junpei and his friends. Your group alternates between going to the dancefloor and getting covered in paint and hanging out in the bar area and enjoying your drinks. Whenever you need the bathroom after your encounter with Megumi you ask Yuuji to escort you. He was a little drunk, but not too out of it to look after you.

Your sides were splitting from laughter while hanging out with Yuuji and his friends all evening. Their humour and the combination of flowing alcohol is almost enough to take your mind off being attacked.

It felt good to forget.

So, you keep drinking more… and more… and more…

“I never thought we’d see the day miss perfect gets drunk.” a friendly feminine voice speaks from the bar stool behind you.

When you turn to face the source, it’s two of your classmates. In particular, the Megumi fan club. You’ve never seen them in a club setting before, it was understandable that they didn’t think you had this side to you. It's almost embarrassing trying to formulate a response for them, you're hiccupping and slurring your words like a fool. But they're bubbly and joyous and make you feel good, you feel welcome in their little group.

You're surprised however since they seemed furious that you dared to befriend their dear Megumi.

“My friend just texted me from the dancefloor, did you know Gojo is here?” you hear Junpei speak from the other side of you. Itadori yells loudly in excitement as you turn to face them. “Shall we go see him?” Junpei follows up.

“Nah,” he tells the group as he squeezes you tighter. “I’ll see him if he comes to get a drink.”

“Y-Yuuji,” you hiccup, “don’t stay because of me, go and see your friend!” you command, not wanting to spoil his evening.

“I’m not leaving you.” he speaks plainly.

“We’ll look after her.” your classmates speak.

You both turn your attention to the girls who were grinning from ear to ear. You smile back at the offer, their smiles feel sincere and you feel safe to stick with them all night while your boyfriend reunites with his friend. But you turn your body back to look at him to gauge his reaction. He’s so loving and protective, you aren’t sure he’s be willing to risk leaving you while you're drunk with two people he doesn’t know.

“Are they friends of yours?” Yuuji asks. You nod quickly.

“They’re in my class.” you almost bark at him in your intoxicated state. He gives them a look. He’s assessing them carefully; you can see the cogs whirring in his mind as he’s debating whether he trusts them enough to leave you in their care.

“Okay,” he speaks before kissing you on the forehead. He looks deeply into your eyes, almost begging you to pay attention and pleading that you’ll process what he’s telling you. “I’ll only be in the room next door. Come and find me if you need me.” he says, a serious look etched on his features.

“I- duh, I will.” You respond almost mockingly. He knows you don’t mean it, you’ve had one too many pink and blue pints.

“Please take care of her. I won’t be long.” he tells them.

You wave goodbye, but you don’t even get the chance to watch him leave as your friends spin your stool around to face the bar. ‘Shots!’ They both scream, ordering a round. They also order you another pink and blue pint to accompany the one you hadn’t finished. You're all laughing and joking. It's nice to bond with more people on your art course, you usually just keep to yourself and do your work, but you're always friendly and approachable whenever anyone speaks to you.

The girls ask you so many questions, taking a genuine interest in you. It's hard to answer in your drunken state of mind, but you do your best. You all connect over stories of your lives. Things like ex-boyfriends and vacation stories, all of which made you laugh and smile. The drinks keep flowing and there's no sign of your boyfriend returning. You're worried he’d panic if you left your spot, but when you all agree that you need a bathroom trip you couldn’t resist.

When you all stand up from the stools, the girls stand on either side of you and take one of your hands. It's so sweet, so you won’t lose each other in the crowd as you try to find your way.

You feel so dizzy, so sick and uncomfortable, you aren’t even sure how you're standing up.

Thankfully your new friends manage to pull you up the stairs and to the girls bathroom. When you enter, the three of you make a beeline for the famed ‘twin toilets’ the girls toilets were known for. It's a cubicle that's double the size of the others, so there's room for a plus one or a plus two for a toilet trip. The blonde girl sat down first, but she was just sitting on the lid. She didn’t pull her panties down to pee, it was like she was just taking a load off her feet.

“How long does it take to work?” the redhead asks her friend while she lords above her.

You lost your balance and fell on your backside. Both of your legs were stretched out in front of you while your back rests on the cubicle wall. Your head slouches forward and you can’t keep your eyes open while you try to focus on not puking.

“Please… please guys I need to—”

You were interrupted with the feeling of warmth travelling through your jeans. You were unable to feel embarrassed as you knew what was happening. But your mind is so completely and utterly fucked you couldn’t bring yourself to care enough.

“Oh my god, it’s working. Did you just piss yourself? Ew…” the blonde asks and giggles, her friend joining in.

You're about to speak, to defend yourself. It was their fault for not letting you go first. But while you try to find the words, vomit escapes you instead. It covered your chin and white t-shirt. You're a pathetic drunken mess covered in paint, pee and sick. The girls were in hysterics at your misfortune.

“Fucking gross. That’s so nasty,” the redhead exclaims, still cackling. “That pill Megumi told us to slip in her drink was really strong, huh.” she muses to her partner in crime as they look down at you.

You lose all ability to be coherent or focused. So, with the final blow of that earth shattering sentence, your eyes close and you fell backwards onto the sticky club toilet floor.

You don’t remember anything after that. You don’t remember the girls cutting open your t-shirt and writing bitch on your chest in blood-red lipstick. You don’t remember them leaving you and shutting the door carefully behind them so no one would notice you. You don’t remember the kind woman who did notice you, helping you up. You don’t remember that same woman and her other friend carrying you through the club while you repeatedly babbled musings of

'Yuuji… Yuuji… Yuuji…'

You don’t remember finally finding him, and him crying out in heartbreak as he saw your miserable beaten frame in the arms of those women. You don’t remember him taking you home in Gojo’s car, the designated driver of his own group he was out partying with.

You don’t remember sleeping for 45 hours straight.

© 2021 fuwushiguro | © 2023 rinhaler

[rrenzwrld]

april 22, 2022

something i made for a scraped armin ff that i never posted..

i’m sorry about the scraps BUT it’s just until i write something new bc i haven’t posted in a while

i’m sorry again yall😭but enjoy!! <3

[ Y/F/P : your favorite kind of pizza. ]

You had liked Armin Arlert since middle school. But this was before his glowup that sent quite a few girls his way. No matter how many dates he went on or how many girls he’s kissed in that time, you were always in his sights. The only thing holding him back was the courage to let you know how he felt. And because he waited so long, he had to share you with the gaze of other men. Other men who’d brag about your talents in bed or your appearance that particular day. He hated hearing them speak about you as if you were an object and he hated watching you allow that to happen.

Although your feelings for Armin were strong, you kept them to yourself. In your mind, he was far to perfect to be in a relationship with you. You fell in love with his eyes, his smile, his aura until you realized none of those things were for you. They were for the girls who you thought deserved him. The girls who were prettier, skinnier, outgoing, athletic. The girls who weren’t hidden in the shadows by people they were dating or messing with. The girls that someone would be proud of. And you thought that wasn’t you. The guys that you’ve had sexual relationships with never mentioned being in an actual relationship with you, only wanting sex and pleasure from you. But this was routine.

The small nap that you were supposed to be taking lasted longer than you expected and night had fallen before you knew it. You sat up and stretched before rubbing at your eyes and grabbing your phone off the nightstand, which was filled with missed calls and text messages from your friends. You called them all back to let them know you were alright before getting up to get yourself something to eat.

“Damn.. I need to go grocery shopping.” You cursed yourself as you rummaged through your pantry. You looked back at your phone ringing with a facetime call. You answered it and propped up the phone on the counter against a container of sugar close to the wall.

“Girl why the fuck didn’t you answer me? You supposed to be sick.” Reneé said angrily.

“I am. I just took a nap—“

“A nap that lasted 5 hours?” You hadn’t even noticed that you were sleeping for as long as 5 hours, but you felt a bit rejuvenated and better than earlier.

“Yeah.. but I’m fine now. Not dead.” You said as you went through your fridge.

“What the fuck are you doing?”

“I’m hungry and I’m just now realizing that I haven’t went to the store. My pantry and shit bout dry as hell.”

“Well we can go to the store after class tomorrow. I need to go too that’s why I’ve been eating out— you want me to pick up a pizza?”

“Where you at?” You picked up the phone and walked into your room, turning on the lights.

“Jean’s… he’s gone now though. Something bout going to get beer or whatever. But who the fuck drinks beer?” You laughed at her comment.

“White folks.”

“You not wrong but… I’m coming over there and I’m bringing someone.”

“Jean?” You straightened up your room a bit, phone in hand as you talked, not really wanting to put it down anywhere.

“No you stupid bitch. Connie and Eren.” Your eyes widened, you didn’t have anything against either of them but you would have preferred if she’d come by herself.

“Why?”

“Because they wanna see how you were doing. They’re coming with Jean when he comes back so I’ll let you know.” You felt your whole mood shift.

“Okay.. well,” You sighed. “I’m gonna go so Jean won’t freak out when he sees you on the phone with somebody other than himself.”

“Girl bye. That nigga don’t own me. But I’ll see you later though. Bye~” Now that people were coming over, you actually had a reason to fix your house a bit, even if it was after 8pm.

“Yeeeerrrrr-“ Connie walked through the front door of your place with two boxes of pizza in his hands while Eren followed behind him with sodas and other things.

“Connie shut the fuck up, you know she got neighbors.”

“Shit, my bad..” Reneé rolled her eyes at him.

“Hey boo~” Reneé pulled you into a bone-crushing hug after you closed the door behind everyone and locking it. “You feeling okay?”

“Yeah, just hungry right now though,” You walked over to where Connie had sat the pizza down on the counter. “What kind you get?”

“Pepperoni and Y/F/P. Probably should’ve got another box because you know how that fat ass over there is..” She was referring to Connie, who had made himself comfortable on your couch.

“I know. But he’ll be alright. Eren!” You called.

“Yeah?” You looked at the bags he was sitting on the counter.

“What’s that? Sodas?”

He nodded. “And liquor—“

“Whoa who the fuck said we was drinking?” You looked at Reneé.

“He said he was buying it ‘just in case’. But you can just keep it here for some other time.” You sent a glare Eren’s way, receiving a wink from him in response.

“Y’all gonna eat or what?”

After everyone had eaten, none of you did much of anything other than being forced to watch movies with Reneé. Only you and Reneé seemed to be paying attention as Eren tapped away on his phone and Connie getting high out of his mind.

“Connie, you ain’t tell nobody you had weed.” Reneé eyed the boy, watching him take another hit of the blunt he held. His eyes were red and lidded as he sat in the black loveseat, knees spread apart in front of him.

“Was I supposed to?”

“Bitch..” Reneé mumbled as Connie softly laughed at her.

“Reneé.” Eren looked up from his phone.

“Yes, Yeager?”

“Lemme use your car.” She looked at him like he was crazy.

“Uh why?”

“I gotta go somewhere real quick. I’ll be right back. Promise.” Reneé rolled her eyes before hovering the keys over the palm of his hand.

“Where you going?” She snatched the keys back.

“Not you clocking him.” You commented.

“Right. Thought yall wasn’t fucking anymore.” Reneé and Eren directed their eyes at Connie.

“It’s my fucking car—“

“Reneé. You gonna give me the keys or not?” Eren’s hand was still held out. You didn’t know where he wanted to go in such a rush but it probably wasn’t your business. You continued to watch the movie.

“I’ll take you wherever you need to go. I don’t gotta hand my shit over to you just cause you ask. Bring ya’ ass.”

“Stop telling me what to do.” Eren mumbled as Reneé let Eren out in front of her.

“Y/n, I’ll be back.” She said as she closed the door behind her, leaving you with Connie.

[moon-witchs-world]

Growing Pains - Remus J. Lupin part 2

Growing Pains – part two

A Hogwarts Tale

Remus Lupin x Fem!WitchReader

2,8k words

Summary: In 1994 both reader and Remus Lupin are newly appointed teachers at Hogwarts, school of witchcraft and wizardry. They meet again after 13 years, when they last saw each other at the very same school. Remus struggles with his secret being shared with the full staff and Y/N struggles with feelings she has for a certain someone.

This is part two of a multiple part series. You can find part one here

Masterlist

Your first few weeks of teaching flew by. You were pleasantly surprised by the level of skill some of your students had already reached. In particular there was a girl of Gryffindor house in her third year who hadn’t failed to answer a question correctly yet. It filled you with joy to teach the students and see their confidence grow and spell work improve over the weeks.

But not everything was great. After your confrontation in the corridor after the welcoming feast, Remus Lupin had been avoiding you. He hardly ever showed up at neither breakfast nor lunch and he was always one of the first to arrive and leave at the dinner table. Your full schedule of teaching prevented you from arriving at dinner early so you missed him almost every time. When you were both in the staff room at the same time, he avoided your gaze or simply left.

Over the past couple of weeks you had seen Remus a couple of times in passing, but that was all. You hadn’t picked up the courage to stop by his office to talk to him, too afraid he would get mad again. But still, he was on your mind more often than you’d like to admit.

On this particular afternoon, you decided to go to the staff room. You enjoyed being there. Most of the time it was a quiet, warm place where there was always a fresh pot of coffee and some snacks to be found. You had spent many hours curled up in one of the chairs in front of the fireplace reading, preparing lessons or correcting homework. You would be doing a mixture of all three for a couple of hours before your next class and was hoping the room would be empty.

When you entered the staff room, you thought no one was there. That was until you saw someone sitting on the floor, in front of an old cupboard. His light-brown hair was even messier than usual and he hadn’t even noticed someone entered the room, he was lost in his thoughts.

‘Remus? I.. How are you?’ you said softly. It was obvious you had startled him.

‘I’m sorry, I didn’t see you there, Y/N,’ he answered. When he looked at you, you noticed he looked tired. With the full moon approaching, he was definitely not feeling great. He adverted his gaze and concentrated once more on the cupboard in front of him.  

‘What are you doing?’ you asked when he did not respond to your first question.

‘There’s a boggart in this cupboard. I intend to use it to teach my third-years, but I can’t seem to get the bloody cupboard to open,’ he growled. He got up and crossed his arms in front of him. You walked over and stopped in front of the cupboard.

‘Portabeto!’ you said with your wand pointed at the lock. The spell left a smoking hole where the keyhole used to be, but the door opened.

Remus looked at you and gave you a weak smile.

‘Of course. When alohomora didn’t work I was so surprised I didn’t know what to do,’ he said with a slight flush on his face.

‘We can’t all be spell enthusiasts,’ you said kindly. You just looked at each other for a moment. There was so much you wanted to ask him, but you weren’t sure of the timing. When a group of loudly chatting third-years entered the staff room, you raised your eyebrows at Remus.

‘Ah, yes. I invited the students here today to learn about boggarts. So if you don’t mind…’ he said, obviously wanting you to leave. You nodded, then leaned a bit closer so he could hear you while you whispered: ‘meet me tonight 8pm, my office. I need to talk to you in private.’ His green eyes pierced yours but without giving him the chance to answer, you left the staff room, hoping he would come.

~~**~~

It was almost eight o’clock when you put your quill down. After leaving the staff room you hadn’t seen Remus for the rest of the day. You had been determined to keep yourself busy grading essays while you waited for him in your office, but the nerves were getting the better of you. The longer you had to wait for him to arrive, the more you started to doubt whether it was stupid to invite him. Just then, you heard a soft knock on the door.

‘Come in!’ you said, maybe a bit too enthusiastically. The door opened and Remus appeared. His hair a mess and he was wearing a particular shabby robe. 

‘Seventh floor, what a terrible location for an office. Lots… lots of stairs,’ he said with the tiniest trace of a smile, obviously a bit out of breath. You pointed at the window.

‘The view’s amazing though.’ He slowly walked to the window and peered out of it, hands in his pockets. You observed him for a moment. When he suddenly turned around and saw you staring you looked away quickly.

‘Please, sit down. Would you like some tea?’ you asked him. Remus nodded and sat down in the chair opposite you.

‘How was your day? Did it work out with the boggart?’ you asked while pouring two cups of herbal tea from the pot you just made. At first he seemed surprised. He obviously wasn’t expecting chit chat, but it felt weird not to at least make a bit of light conversation before you asked what you wanted to. He took the cup of steaming tea you handed him and then answered. 

‘It went really well, actually. The students really enjoyed themselves and learned a lot as well. I didn’t let Harry have a chance with the boggart. I was afraid it would take the form of Lord Voldemort, but I thought wrong. The boy came to see me after class and told me his biggest fear was a dementor, so basically fear itself. Highly intelligent young boy.’ Remus smiled while talking, it was obvious he liked the boy a lot. Then you realized something.

‘Harry Potter? Of course, James and Lily’s son. Must be hard to see him, he’s the spitting image of his father. And if I remember correctly, it’s not just his looks that he got from his father,’ you said with a smile. 

‘It’s hard. I miss James. But being able to teach his son is healing in a way,’ he answered, his voice soft, almost like a whisper.

You acted on impulse when you stretched out your hand and put it on his. He didn’t pull his hand away, but looked at you. His green eyes were so kind, it made you feel at ease. It felt like some kind of spell was broken when finally he did move his hand away and your fingers landed on the desk. 

‘But you didn’t invite me here to reminisce about old friends,’ he said with a more serious undertone. You hesitated for a moment, but then decided you just had to talk about it. There was no use dancing around it, Remus knew you asked him here to talk about something. 

‘So, the full moon is four days away,’ you said matter-of-factly. 

‘I’m well aware, thank you very much,’ he answered coldly. You took a deep breath.

‘How are you feeling?’

‘How do you think I’m feeling?’

‘I obviously want to hear it from you or I wouldn’t have asked,’ you said in the same cold tone as he had used before. You knew this conversation wasn’t going to be pleasant, but still you felt like you just had to have it. 

‘I obviously don’t want to talk about it or I would have done so myself,’ he said and he pushed his chair back, ready to get up and leave. 

‘Excuse me for being nice to you, Remus, because judging from the way you’re treating me you want to scare away the only person who’s actually really nice to you.’

You were both silent for a couple of seconds. Remus had averted his eyes, looking down at his own hands. 

‘I’m sorry, Y/N.’ 

When he looked at you again, you noticed his green eyes stared at you remorsefully. You didn’t say anything. Not only was it very painful to be rejected by him so loudly, you also didn’t know what to say, scared to anger him again. 

‘ I know you mean well, but I don’t want to talk about it. You have enough on your plate already without my problems added to it as well,’ he said calmly. 

‘I have absolutely nothing on my plate. Consider my plate empty,’ you replied quickly. When he looked at you in disbelief, you knew you had pushed it too far.

‘Well, okay, it’s not exactly empty, but there is space. I wouldn’t ask if I couldn’t handle it, Remus.’

He sighed and then looked at you again as if he was trying to figure out if you could indeed handle it.

‘You’re not going to drop this, are you?’ he asked and you shook your head immediately. 

‘Not a chance.’ 

‘Why would you want to help me? Not only am I dangerous, I’m also a bit rude,’ he said. You raised one of your eyebrows.

‘A bit rude? Understatement of the century, mister Lupin.’ He laughed, the first genuine smile you saw from him in a long time.

‘Yeah, you’re right. I’ve been very rude. I thought it would scare you away, but you’re very persistent. And you’re avoiding my question. Why would you want to help me?’ he asked. He kept looking at you with his mossy eyes and you were the first to look away. 

‘I like you,’ you heard yourself say and immediately you wish you could take those words back. They sounded heavy, inappropriate and spoken too soon.

‘I mean when you’re not acting like a complete jerk, you’re actually really kind. And I strongly believe people shouldn’t be judged by something they can’t help. I know what it feels like to be isolated and alone and I don’t wish that upon anyone else. And you’re the only person who’s been genuinely nice to me, before you decided to ignore me for weeks.’ Your words tumbled out of your mouth quickly. 

 Remus seemed to consider your words for a bit.

‘I thought you and Severus were very good friends,’ he suddenly said. For a moment you thought he was kidding, but the serious look on his face told you otherwise.

‘Friends? Not at all. We sometimes sit next to each other at breakfast. And last week, I  let him borrow one of my books. Yeah, that’s about the depth of our friendship,’ you said sarcastically.

‘He speaks very highly of you to the other teachers. I’ve never heard him compliment another person ever before, so I assumed you must be friends. But then again, he always had a thing for bright and pretty witches.’ Remus’ flushed cheeks matched your own in the silence that followed.

‘Okay, he officially freaks me out even more now. But stop changing the subject. We were going to put your problems on my almost empty plate,’ you encouraged him.

‘Well, as you might have noticed with the full moon approaching, I start to feel different. On edge. My temper is short. I sleep badly. My body aches. The Wolfsbane potion will make sure I get to keep my sanity when I tranform. When I first arrived at Hogwarts, Dumbledore arranged a place where I could go during my transformations. I will go there again during the full moon. Should keep me and everyone else safe. When the full moon is over, I return to the castle and need a few days to recover.’

When he stopped talking you looked at him. It seemed as if a certain weight had been lifted off his shoulders. 

‘Your turn,’ he said. You looked at him with raised eyebrows.

‘Well, since we’re sharing our deepest, darkest truths, I want you to tell me about your late husband.’

It felt as if all the oxygen had disappeared from the room. You felt uneasy, overwhelmed by a sudden knot in your stomach and a lump in your troath. 

‘I don’t talk about that.’

‘Yeah, that’s not going to happen, Y/N. I talked about the wolf thing, you talk about this. I want to understand it. Support you.’

You knew Remus was right. It would help to talk about it to someone new. Someone who wasn’t there when it happened, who never even knew your late husband that well. You had always had a hard time talking to people about your husband’s death when they had their own grief as well. You never felt like you could openly talk about him because you wanted to reassure others. You considered for a moment, then decided you wanted to talk about it to Remus. He would listen to your every word and maybe that was exactly what you needed right now. 

‘After we left Hogwarts, he became an auror. He was a very good one. Great at defensive spells. Everyone loved working with him, felt safe when he was around. On that particular day, he and his colleague were called to this abandoned house. People in the neighborhood had been hearing screaming and weird noises for weeks. My husband and his colleague entered the house and they split up to search it.’

You stopped talking for a moment. You were getting to the part of the story that was hard to tell. Remus noticed this and this time it was him who leaned forward to grab your hand. He gave an encouraging squeeze and you took a deep breath before you continued to talk.

‘He went to inspect the upstairs area. It was an ambush. There were several Death Eaters there waiting for him. He got hit by a killing curse from one of them. I later found out my husband had been responsible for arresting a huge number of Death Eaters and this was their revenge. His colleague was able to escape.’ Your eyes felt watery and you stared at your hand, the one that was still covered with Remus’ scarred one. He was the first to speak again.

‘You said he had gotten into an accident at work. This was definitely not an accident.’ Suddenly you just couldn’t remain seated. You got up and started pacing. You heard Remus get up as well and you stopped in front of the window, with your back to him so he wouldn’t see the few tears that had escaped from your eyes. 

‘I know it wasn’t an accident, it just sounds better, so that is what I usually say when I can’t avoid the subject,’ you replied after a while. Remus didn’t say anything, but he had walked up to you, stopped when he was just inches away from you. You could feel his warm breath against your hair. He put an arm around your shoulders and pulled your body against his. There was no need to talk. Nothing to say, just being held by him was all you needed in that moment. There was an urge to turn around and kiss him, but you weren’t brave enough. 

Suddenly, there was a knock on the door. You two broke apart as if you were being struck by lightning.  

‘Come in,’ you said after quickly wiping your eyes. The door opened and Severus Snape appeared, holding a smoking goblet. He was looking through the curtains of his greasy hair with a look of disgust on his face. 

‘There you are, Lupin. Minerva said you asked her for directions to Y/N’s office so I knew where to find you. You seem to have forgotten your potion. A very unwise action so close to the full moon, but apparently you were too caught up seducing our new Charms Professor,’ he said coldly. 

‘Severus, thank you. I seem to have forgotten the time. I apologize,’ Remus said quickly, but Severus ignored him. 

‘Is everything okay, Y/N? I’d like to remind you that the full moon is only four days away and when the wolf in question is so indifferent about taking his potion on time, you should be careful around him,’ he said to you, his black eyes piercing yours. Before you could respond, Severus left again. 

‘Yeah. I should leave as well. I need to take this potion and I need to rest. It was lovely talking to you, Y/N,’ Remus said. 

You nodded. You had no idea what to say to him. You wanted him to stay, but felt like you couldn’t ask that. You weren't sure why you felt so brave all of a sudden, but you got on you tiptoes and wrapped your arms around his neck, pulling his body towards yours in a tight embrace. For a moment you stood there, his strong arms squeezing around you tightly. You never wanted this moment to stop, but after a while you broke apart.

‘I’ll see you tomorrow. Good night, Y/N,’ he said before he left, leaving you alone with your confusing feelings.

Part three

[goatskickin]

Welcome back! When we last left, our heir Faith and her roommate Bettina were in competition over the bigger bed, and their moms were seeing them off to Brainia U.

How have the girls been doing away at college?

      After Bettina and Faith got settled into their charming ramshackle student house, the only thing left to do was get used to living with each other.

“Bettina, shut the computer off. Let’s go out.”

“Just a minute! I only have until midnight to submit this response for class.”

“So? You’ve got hours then! Let’s go!”

“I am trying to get ahead here. I am doing homework. Ever heard of it?”

“Don’t be an asshole. My homework is just different than yours.”

“Oh sure, I forgot…don’t you like have to pretend to be an orange or something? Do a monologue about fading beauty or some crap?”

“I need to print off my monologue for class actually, so let’s go! Let’s go to campus!”

“Fine.”

Faith has tried to make the most of Brainia U’s many student centers, as well as every local hangout.

The actual students at Brainia U are a mixed bag however.

“O, what a noble mind is here o'erthrown! The courtier's, soldier's, scholar's, eye, tongue, sword; The expectancy and rose of the fair state, The glass of fashion and the mould of form, The observed of all observers, quite, quite down! And I, of ladies most deject and wretched, That suck'd the honey of his music vows, Now see that noble and most sovereign reason, Like sweet bells jangled, out of tune and harsh; That unmatch'd form and feature of blown youth Blasted with ecstasy: O, woe is me, To have seen what I have seen, see what I see!”

“Wow, nothing? That’s the best Ophelia I’ve done all week.”

“Everyone’s a critic.”

“People are idiots Bettina.  Doesn’t anyone know anything about art around here?

…

Aren’t you going to have any chili? I mean, if you want to have some tomorrow once the flavors have melded that’s totally fine…”

Bettina quickly finds out just how often her roommate cooks. Maybe it’s a comfort thing.

But it is almost constant. Bettina never goes hungry.

Bettina approaches college life a little more quietly than her roommate. She has never been away from home, and she’s also never lived without her twin, Wade.

Now that she is living (almost alone), she’s found that she’s the kind of person who finds quiet, solitary activities to be stimulating.

How they spend downtime is not something that Bettina and Faith agree on.

“HEY! It’s 8pm! What the fuck is that noise! I’m reading!”

“Well, in Act 3 of the play I am auditioning for –“

“YEAH maybe you don’t need to do that right now! Thanks!”

Bettina does have her own connections on campus outside of Faith.

“Yah gotta come over. My roommate, she’s kind of a lot to handle, but she makes this bomb vegan lasagna! It’s way too much for two people.”

Given that Brainia U had been isolated for decades, its population has subsisted off the left-behind non-perishables for the college-aged set. Fresh fruit and vegetables are a thing that only Pitstop Valley locals have. There are no resources or plan to get produce to Brainia U.

Thankfully, Faith has brought enough spices, vinegars, tomato paste and nutritional yeast to make any food taste homemade. Or at least less like packaged ramen noodles and canned vegetables.

“Bettina! Where is my microplane!”

“Your what?”

“My microplane! With the green handle? Did you put it in a funny spot?

“What?! You…something about a tiny plane?”

“What?! No, a microPLA – oh, found it.”

“Bettina. Guess who I talked to at the quad today. Guess.”

“Uh, I don’t know Faith. You’re kind of keeping company with a few different dudes right now.”

“Ah, ahHA! HA! You’re so funny. Like, hilarious. But no, guess.”

“Uh…”

“John Choi.”

“Oh my gosh, fuck you! No, you didn’t!”

“I did!”

        Yes, John Choi. This pink-hatted, monocled man is a high-value slice at Brainia U.

“So, John, why pink? Such a powerful color.”

“Pink speaks to me, you know? And I guess it’s speaking to everyone else too.”

“I mean I also saw your friend Skylar on campus, later on.”

“Oh, he’s cute! Why don’t you ask him out?!”

“Oh, I dunno…”

“He likes you Faith! He’s totally smart, and he’s in our history lecture – “

“Oh man, that professor has such a droning voice I fall asleep every time! Why have a lecture right at 2pm? That’s nap time.”

“Ask Skylar to take notes for you! That’s how you can start talking to him!”

“Well, then why don’t you date him, if he’s so great?”

“He likes you Faith! You’re gonna scare him off by being – “

“By being what, Bettina!”

Faith’s keeping her options open. As a Family sim, the end goal is marriage. Obviously.

  “So, you’re not worried about prolonged hot tub exposure and your future sperm production?”

“My…my what?!”

“What do you mean you do use your laptop right on your lap?! Don’t you know that’s a recipe for low-yielding baby gravy?!”

Faith has many options.

All she has to do is choose and make her move.

Provided that all parties agree to the arrangement.

“You calling me a hoe Bettina? Because that’s fine! At least I am putting myself out there.”

Even so, Faith’s not much of a charmer.

So, it remains to be seen if Faith “putting herself out there” will produce any worthwhile relationships.

“Faith you are impossible. I love you. Dumbass.”

“Of course, you do. What about you? What about your dude, that guy from your biology lab? SeaBass?”

“Can you not call him that?! His name is Sebastian.”

“I’m working on him, okay?”

“He’s a warlock, you know? Him and his twin. Like, my mom is kind of old fashioned when it comes to magic stuff, but male witches do exist, they are just like, more rare? And his twin – “

“Ooh, a twin? Should we double date? OOH! Double wedding ceremony?!”

“Listen! I haven’t even like…like, okay I am working on it. I think Seb knows that I like him.”

“He’s just like, shy or whatever. Maybe they do things differently in Pleasantview.”

“Or he’s some kind of freak. Or his dick doesn’t work. Or he’s blind.”

   “My focus is on school. If something happens with Seb, so be it.”

“Okay, sure grandma. But like, have fun and look around. What’s the harm?”

“It’s a numbers game, babes.”

“You failed our 11th grade math class.”

“It’s simple numbers. You cast a wide net and you pull some back. I’m being economical.”

“Um, how? And didn’t you fail economics too?”

“Fuck off! I got a C-.”

“Maybe you should be a little more…selective? Like, I get wanting to see what’s out there, but there’s some real duds dudes Faith. Why waste your time?”

“What do you mean? Like who?!”

“Like that guy you saw at the park on campus? Komei?”

“Ehh…shut up…”

“HA! How did that go down exactly?”

“He was nice enough! But he moved way too fast for me.”

“But! I also saw this other guy. Leo?”

“The guy with the shitty beard?! EW! Faith!”

“What! You are so judgmental!”

“I’m not committed to anyone right now. I have lots of options.”

“Marriage is the goal, though.”

Talk of boys aside, there is only one boy who has all the girls on campus losing it: John Choi.

No one can resist him, and boys want to be him. For some reason.

John Choi is more than “kinda okay”. He’s hot stuff!

Faith wants to talk to him.

As do all the other ladies on campus.

Fortune favors the brave!

“Gosh *blushes* I wish that were me!”

“Gosh, John Choi is so smooth.”

“Gosh…I wanted to hit on that blonde girl…”

No luck for Tempe. John Choi has claimed yet another First Kiss from a lucky dormie.

Faith is not deterred; she’s a practical gal and takes the opportunity to chat with the competition. She finds out from Blonde Dormie the coffee shop Mr. John Choi frequents and takes Bettina along for a scouting mission.

“Shit, she was right, he’s here!”

“Shh! Let’s get an espresso.”

Bettina ends up having a front row seat to this scene, however. John Choi to the rescue.

“Balls. Look at that. We will never have a chance with John Choi now…”

“Lucky bitch.”

Tina Sell is the lucky bitch in question.

“Well, we still got coffee and the day is young. What next?”

“Don’t you have to like, go to class or something Faith?”

“So…your hair feels like wool, right? Can I touch it?”

“Never mind Bettina. Let’s fucking leave.”

      Luckily, Brainia U is full of marriage prospects for Faith. Like Skylar here. He and Bettina are pals. They met engaging in some after class activities. 

Somehow, against all odds and logic.

Faith nabs a First Kiss from Skylar!

Skylar’s a pragmatic guy, it turns out.

“So, your plans after school are to try and make it as an actress?”

“Or a singer. Or both! I could always fall back on modeling too, I suppose.”

“Hm. So, what’s Pitstop Valley like? I’ve never left Bluewater Village until I came to school.”

“Uh, I don’t know it’s fine, I guess? Small town, nothing to do, but my parents live there.”

“Hm. So kind of a landing spot until you figure things out, yeah?”

“What’s with all the questions, Skylar?”

“Just thinking about today’s history lecture. I mean, we are the first class that Brainia U has had in 65 years. That’s only because of the work that your mom and your aunt Mercy did. Getting the school set back up for students, getting the students here, getting faculty – “

“What the fuck? Did you just come over because you wanted to kiss the girl with the semi-famous mom? That’s kinda – “

“Don’t you worry about the future? About the future of Pitstop Valley? You guys have an active militia, everyone can go to school, you have an athletic team! You guys have actual fruit and vegetables – you know not everyone has that, right?

I’m just saying, Pitstop Valley has the potential to do even more. Don’t you think about that? Don’t you want to be a part of that? I would.”

“Uh, I’m going to dance class. See ya Skylar.”

“I don’t think that Faith likes me, Bettina.”

*zzzz* - “..wha? Oh, she does Sky, she just has a funny way of showing it.” *zzz*

     Faith is a complex young lady. She spends a lot of time on campus husband hunting, but she also is a huge fan of the campus Cinema. She considers it research, but also a way to meet people.

“Hey, can I sit here?”

“No.”

“What I am saying, is if multiple scenes in a row are shot at Dutch angles, doesn’t that defeat the purpose of what a Dutch angle is supposed to mean? If it’s all Dutch angles, then is the spooky and unsettling tone of the scene actually the ‘norm’ of that universe? You know?”

“What do you mean! Give me an example.”

“Well, like in Battlefield Earth – “

“What, that piece of trash! You can’t – “

“Just because a piece of art is bad, does not mean it can’t be a part of a discussion about how an art form is portrayed. Like, if – “

“Faith, what about – “

“Shut up Tempe. Anyway – "

“What, so we should take a critical lens to every romance novel and kids movie? Is that what you’re saying?!”

“No. What I am saying is that movies, books, plays, whatever – it doesn’t have to be ‘art’ to be viewed with a critical lens.”

“That’s bullshit!”

“I can’t say I agree. Art reflects the time it was made in. Pop culture is important.”

“Yeah right!”

Not everyone likes healthy intellectual debate.

“Ugh, is this a commercial for perfume or a new Terrance Malick movie?! Someone get me the remote.”

Bettina has a weekly call with her mother, on Tuesdays after her Biology lab.

“Hey ma! This is Brainia U calling.”

“Hiiiii baby! HI! Oh, it’s so good to hear your voice! What’s new? How’s the semester?”

“Oh god, I adjusted my microscope too fast in my biology lab today and totally cracked the cover slip and the slide beneath it. Total rookie mistake, so embarrassing.”

“Aww, well I am sure you didn’t mean it!”

“I sure did not! Embarrassing though…anyway, can I ask you a witch-related question?”

“Baby, of course! Are you finally thinking about following the family tradition?!”

“Haha, maaaa, when you say it like that it makes me not want to tell you about this, haha.”

“Oh! Ha, I’m sorry, I’m sorry, I’ll shut up. What is it?”

“Well, I know that you know that clean up spell? For cleaning? I’d like to learn it.”

“Oh of course hun! But you know, it’s really more for water-based messes. Can I ask why?”

“Well, I wanted to know about that spell kinda for selfish reasons.”

“Faith makes a lot of food in our house, but she leaves behind hella dishes! And I’m tired of it, sometimes I don’t want to have to wash a fork, you know?”

“I mean, it’s not that I don’t appreciate the food. Like, who makes pancakes that as leftovers that taste good! I’m not complaining.”

“Good! You’d better not complain. That’s my grandpa Patrick’s Crème de la orange pancake recipe. You’d be some sort of tastebud-less freak if you didn’t like it.”

“Is that Faith? Tell her I said hi! Gosh, she still has quite the mouth on her. Has she heard any news from her mother?”

“…wait, what? What do you mean ‘news’?”

“Well, I love our weekly calls, I just love hearing from my baby girl! But you know, I don’t know what the relationship is like with Faith and her mother? So, I was just wondering, since she’s left, if Faith has heard from her at all?”

“Ma, what are you talking about? She left? What do you mean ‘left’?

“Oh! So, Faith doesn’t know about this. I’m sorry Bettina! I thought that Faith knew! Does she not know?”

“MOM. What are you talking about? What happened to Genesis?”

“Well, you know I got in the helicopter with Mercy after we left Brainia U, and Genesis was not in the helicopter with us! Mercy said that she’d decided to do some on-campus research.”

“Uh, okay, so she’s here at school then?”

“Well, that’s the thing – we aren’t really sure? I mean I talked to Mercy about it, and – well you know I just adore her, but something seemed off, you know? Like, she seemed a little shaken up, and I asked her about this on-campus research that Genesis would be doing, and Mercy was pretty tight-lipped about it. And the other day, I was visiting Cheyenne – oh! They took Binx’s last kitten, the one with the orange ears! So cute! She’s got –“

“Ma. Ma! About Genesis?”

“Ah? Oh! Yeah, so, anyway, so it seems like Genesis didn’t tell Justice she would be leaving? Justice is all alone in that house.”

“Oh. Um, weird. Like, is he okay to be alone? I know he’s kinda loopy and whatever.”

“Well, you know as resident ‘Good Witch’ I am checking up on him, but I can only do so much, you know? Actually, the intern at Pitstop Radio, she’s well uh, I’ll need to talk to her again, but she – "

“Mom, so like, Mr. Springs-Eternal is all alone and like, Genesis is here at campus?”

“Yes, I think so! It’s just that it doesn’t seem like she let Justice know ahead of time? I was concerned, and Mercy doesn’t seem to know a whole lot about the situation either. I was wondering if it was something that was discussed with Faith and Tempe.”

“Um, like, I don’t think so…I’ll talk to Faith about it.”

“Hey Faith? I –“

“It’s whipped chickpea tofu in the pancakes, if you were wondering.”

“…wha? Oh, okay that’s…no, I wanted to talk to you about your mom.”

“Ha, what? What about my mom?”

“Well, I had my call with my mom and…did you know she’s not at home right now? Like, your dad is alone at home?”

“What do you mean she’s not ‘at home’?”

“Well, my mom said that your mom hasn’t been at home, she’s doing some on-campus research, but like, it doesn’t seem like she told your dad? Or like…did you know about this?”

“Oh what, so she’s been here, and she hasn’t told me, or paid me a visit? Ha! Sounds like something she would do. She’s like, obsessed with work. Whatever.”

“So…that doesn’t bother you? You didn’t know that she wasn’t at home?”

“Um, no? Like, she’s obsessed with the whole thing of like ‘educating the future’. And like, liking human beings as a concept but not like, in practice ya know? No wonder she got abducted.”

“Jeez Faith, that’s kinda harsh.”

  In addition to feeding her roommate, Faith is a natural teacher. Though she would not admit to following in her mother’s footsteps.

Specifically, she wants to teach Bettina how to kick some ass. Because guys like buff girls. According to Faith.

“Okay now reach back and STRIKE! Don’t twist at the waist and don’t lean in too far. We need to develop your weak right hook.”

“Oh, um…hi-YAH!”

“Yes! Now, less floppy with the wrist. Again!”

A little self defense could come in handy at Brainia U.

“Howdy-hey! Are you able to support our team this Saturday?! It’s the quarter finals! How are you not totally pumped about this?!”

“Hey, no offense, but you’re being kind of distracting. We need to finish up this lab report.”

“Babba chooda rum, Babba chooda Ka, Veedum adda beedum adda bonk bonk bonk! Verbits, Verbits, VO GERBITS!”

“Uh, heh, yeah, yeah…okay? We uh, we taking a break? If that’s the case, I am going to play some SSX 3 dude…”

“Hey, Bettina, come sit. Sit! You’re working too hard on that report…

…where did you get that sweater? It’s nice and all, but like…it doesn’t show off your figure? Just saying…”

“…I’m going to make myself a sandwich…you can go…”

Babba chooda rum, Babba chooda Ka, Veedum adda beedum adda bonk bonk bonk! Verbits, Verbits, VO GERBITS!

*zzz* “Huh? EH?! God, you’re still here?!”

Luckily, Bettina’s roommate has a more direct way of getting rid of unwanted guests.

“Hey! Vo Gerbits! Excited for the quarter finals?”

“Well yeah! I’ve got a new routine and me and the other mascots – “

“Hey so…you seem like a man who knows what he wants. And I know what I want.

You know, most fragrances cover up a man’s real smell, you know? I’ll bet you don’t mind working up a sweat. A man’s sweat. I’d love the opportunity to – “

“Whoa, heh, okay, heh, okay! Um, I um, I – you know, I think I’m late for practice?”

…

“You are literally a psycho.”

“Well, it worked, didn’t it? That guy was being a total creep.

…

You want tofu bahn mi? I’m starving.”

Faith continues ponder the husband question. Serdar aka Fancy man is interrupted by her on his way to class.

Faith knows an interesting prospect when she sees one. She takes the opportunity to get to know him better.

“Hey! Serdar, right? You’re in my costuming class? Man, when are we going to actually move on to using sewing machines, you know? I’m sick of mending. If I have to fix another buttonhole, I’ll die.”

“No kidding! I’m not an infant, I don’t need to go over how to do a blanket stitch.”

“Hah, right?!”

Serdar proves to be quite the interesting person. He and Faith share a love of fashion. And Faith’s other favorite hobby, cooking.

“Why not become a chef, Faith? Those were some awesome peanut noodles! What was that acidic element…champagne vinegar?”

“Oh, you’re too sweet! But, no, just regular sherry vinegar. I’d never be a chef though. Late hours, burns on my arms all of the time…not to mention, dealing with all of that kitchen machismo. No offense.”

“None taken!”

“Though you know, I could always put out a cookbook myself! Later on, after I’ve had my acting career? Plus, what I really like to do is cook for friends and family, not like, the masses.”

Serdar turns out to be more friend material than anything. Faith does not mind, however. She’s in need of positive friends who build her up.

“Okay…least favorite fake blood in a movie. Go.”

“Oh! Um…Taxi Driver. It’s awful. It looks like liquid strawberry jelly. Maybe they did that for the rating.”

“Naw, Taxi Driver got an R. But good pick!”

“Thanks! Okay…what’s the best fake blood you’ve seen in a movie Serdar?”

…

“12 Monkeys.”

“REAlly! It’s…oh yeah, at the end, the scene in the airport! Shit, good choice.”

“Have you thought about what you want your short play to be about for your capstone project? I think a riff on a scream queen thing could be totally doable.”

“Well, I am really considering like a Southern Gothic, Tennessee Williams thing, but I’m worried that that would be too ambitious...”

“No, that sounds awesome! You could totally pull that off. Would it be a spoken word thing?”

“Bettina, move, I gotta shower.”

“You have someone over last night to play chess? Huh, looks like a good game.”

“Yeah, Serdar, you know him? He’s pretty cool actually.”

“Oh, you mean Fancy Man? Reallyyyy. So, you’re interested in him then?”

“No no, not like that. We’re just homies.”

“Plus, I think Serdar is gay.”

“What, just because the guy has a kooky sense a style?! That’s kind of close-minded Faith.”

“No, it’s not because of that! I think he is though. I have a feeling he is, even if he doesn’t know it.”

“Uh huh, sure. “

“How’s it going with your dude?”

“Ugh, nowhere?! He’s like, I don’t know what to do…he’s shy and I’m shy! I want him to make a move…but only if he likes me back. It’s hopeless.”

“Bettina, I have an idea.

Let’s invite our History lecture out to the Culinary Arts building, and I’m going to make some food and you are going to invite SeaBass and he is going to fall in love with you.”

“Don’t call him – wait…yeah, no, yeah! That’s a good idea. It will be like, low-key, low-pressure group hang thing, yeah?”

“Exactly.”

            While the girls can’t have parties (Show Business restriction), there’s no rule against to going to  community lot to hang out with whomever is there.

Especially if a certain young Pleasantview warlock is there. 

Faith breaks out her grilled kim-cheese sandwiches, naturally.

“Sebastian! H-Hey! Can I ask you a magic-related question? I think you’d know more about this than me.”

“Hi! Sure!”

“Ha, heh, okay! So Aqua Deletus – can that spell apply to more things other than just puddles of water? I am curious. And what would I need exactly?”

“Oh, sure! Really, you just have to adjust the end incantation and make sure you have more Eye of Newt than you’d think you’d need.”

“Wow, sounds easy! Like um, could you like, help me out with that? I don’t have a cauldron. Could…do you have one? Could you show me how to use it?”

“You…would want to come over? So that I can show you?”

Yes. That is indeed what Bettina was hinting at.

“Kim-cheese sandwiches get it done! It’s the husband maker.”

“I think that other than being famous, that this is what I want to do with my life. Throw parties where I cook for people.”

“Um, I’m sorry, who are you?  I don’t like spicy food.”

“I think that other than being famous, that this is what I want to do with my life. Throw parties where I cook for people.”

“Uh, yeah! Thanks for the sandwich, Faith.”

Faith’s really into anyone who likes her food.

“Gosh, you know Sean – “

“Um, my name is Shea?”

“You know Steve – I could get used to this. I just love entertaining! What better way to spend an afternoon than being with people you want to have around, eating, drinking and being merry?”

~~~

That will do it for this chapter!

Who will Faith choose for a future spouse? Will Bettina get to learn some magic? Will ‘magic’ happen between her and Sebastian Dreamer? Is Faith going to share her grandpa Patrick’s Crème de la orange pancake recipe?

Until next time, Carry On, Woman!

[the-duckless-pond]

It is 03:54 as I begin this post and I have FINALLY finished my flash cards as of about fifteen minutes ago. Holy shit. It feels so amazing to have finally, finally done them.

Yes, I did all of chapter three which was basically entirely verbs. Yes, I did the auxiliary conjugation decks for that chapter too. And for chapters one and two. And for the new verb forms (potential and volitional) that didn’t have decks yet. All done. And then? I even pulled out Nakama 1 and entered in all the verbs from the entire book into those two conjugation decks. Holy shit. It’s done. I’m caught up on flash cards. At long fucking last.

I started around 8pm ish and took two and a half SVU breaks. I did take other little breaks to stretch or get a drink or something too, but I didn’t track how long those were. I guess overall I will say that I took two and a half hours worth of breaks. That means I made flash cards for… like five hours if I did that right. Holy shit. Fuck yeah.

I cannot believe they are actually DONE oh my godddd finally it is manageable again. Now all I have to do going forward is make the cards per each chapter. I’d say that each chapter introduces maybe 100 words and 15-20 verbs on average? So that is super doable and easy.

I don’t know what to do next. I’m still not entirely committed to pulling an all nighter. The flash cards and getting those done whatever it took was my main mission. Everything else is a bonus. I definitely want a little break no matter what I do.

Let’s see. What else is there to do that I could conceivably do well in my very caffeinated but becoming tired state.

I could…

- shower and wash my hair (or better yet take a bath and wash my hair, even if a shower does rinse better than the bath)

- Japanese test take home writing (8 sentences about a trip I will take over winter break, allowed to be lies, must contain certain grammar points)

- japanese extra credit (2 pages in the workbook, maybe with corrections? Idk)

- Japanese test review sheet (a few pages, usually 3 or 4)

- watch instructional videos on grammar points I don’t entirely understand

- line the remaining three cabinets with my contact paper like I’ve been wanting to do for a literal month now

- French exercises 2.1 to 2.3 (although those can be difficult and I am starting to get tired so maybe best saved for Tuesday)

That about sums up all my options. All of those, minus the cabinet lining which is a want, are things that absolutely need to get done that I had intended to do this weekend.

I am in a weird state where I’m yawning but I am pretty awake. Idk what to do. I’ve never pulled an all nighter studying before so how does it work? I have class tomorrow at 5:30pm but it is a review class. If I go to bed now I could wake up around noon and still have time to get more work done, but I worry about super fucking up my sleep schedule. I don’t mind going to bed around 10 or 11 and waking up between 8 and 9, but this would be the second night in a row that I would have gone to bed at like 4am, and that bodes poorly and speaks of a pattern. I don’t want that. Especially because I would have to wait until the weekend to fix it probably. Blah. It’s hard.

I did ask Charlie and she voted against an all nighter but understood my reasoning, and honestly it is such a relief to have those flash cards done that no matter what this was worth it.

I am not committed to staying up and I am not committed to going to bed, but I am very committed to taking a break. So I am laying in bed, glasses off, under the covers. I have my iPad which is probably at full charge if not close. I have my phone which I didn’t get a chance to charge because it is integral to the flash card process and it is at like 40%. My bright nightlight is on and I am on my back, not in my normal sleeping position. I am taking a break.

Boo is here on her pillow. Callie is in the dining room in the corner how she likes, last I saw with her eyes closed and snoozing. Boo seems happy. She is laying down and just closed her eyes. I felt soooooo bad earlier. Around 11pm I needed to charge my vape and I found her in bed on her pillow fast asleep.

There she is. I guess that shows you how bright my nightlight is too! It’s not actually that bright in person. It is bright enough to s the the outlines of things in the room but not so bright that I can’t fall asleep with it on.

Anyway. She was snoring and totally passed out. I really wanted to pet her and cuddle her but I didn’t want to disturb her so I just silently crept to the outlet and plugged in the cord, whispered that I loved her, abd crept back out. When it was done charging and I grabbed it she was still out cold.

She woke up the third time I went into the room. Around 1:30am I finished using my laptop but it was at half battery and I wanted it fully charged for class. So I grabbed the charger and prepared to sneak in. I made it halfway to the outlet before she let out the most heartbreaking meow. She NEVER meows except for when she really needs something (food, love, etc) so u knew she was asking me why I wasn’t in bed yet. She tried to get up but she was coming out of a deep sleep and stumbled and tripped ;~;. I rushed over to her and sat on the bed and started petting her gently and telling her that I was still studying and it was okay to go back to bed. She purred like CRAZY like wow purring so forcefully!! As if to say that she had been waiting for me all that time and she was so happy I was finally there. I stayed in bed with her sitting there while she woke up and petting her for a while. Eventually she got up to get a bite to eat and a drink of water, and I followed her out and got back to work.

After that, instead of going back to bed or to her cat tower like she does during the day, she stayed right by me. I study sitting at the coffee table on a meditation pillow with the couch right behind me. She took up position on the couch and curled right up and went back to sleep. I guess she just wanted to be by me. She is so sweet. I love her so much. I missed her while she was in the bedroom so I took an SVU break after a little and sat with her and she climbed into my lap and purred and purred. Sweet girl.

Callie mostly spent my study time atop Boo’s tower, as fast asleep as she could ever be. I didn’t want to disturb her even though I really wanted to pet her several times. She snored a handful of times and that was really sweet and melted my heart to hear her resting so soundly. She was my little companion for the entire flash card study session. She did get up once to go nap on the bathroom rug, but she moved when I went in there to use the restroom.

Gosh time is flying. Or maybe I talk to much. But it’s my diary so fuck it. It’s 4:25am as I type this sentence. I don’t feel any more or less tired than before I laid down, so I doubt sleep would come easily if I tried. I’m committed to taking a break in the form of resting quietly with my precious terminally ill cat because she wouldn’t have come back to her favorite spot without me. So I guess I will stay laying down for at least a little bit. I put in a lot of work. I’ve earned it. And it does feel nice to lay down. I was kind of hunching over when I was making my flash cards and my back is kind of sore now.

I feel like, just purely based on the amount of caffeine I have consumed since I got started around 8pm (maybe closer to 7:30pm but I wasn’t keeping track so I am saying 8), sleep is a few hours off. I feel roughly mid day level tired, only my eyes hurt a little more than normal. Probably from focusing so intently or something.

I did do the math. If I went to bed now I would wake up around 1:30pm, further worsening my sleep schedule. If I was capable of closing my eyes that is around when I would naturally wake up. It usually takes me about an hour to fall asleep, so I would end up waking up around 2:30pm ish. And because of my particular flavor of depression and executive dysfunction it is unlikely that I would make it to class. I probably wouldn’t take my so called morning medicine until like 5pm, and class starts at 5:30pm and goes until 7pm. Hm. Well then.

So what do I do? I am getting tired, that much is true, but I am always always always tired around what ends up being roughly the middle of my day. That’s why I usually have a caffeinated drink around 2 or 3pm. But with my sleep being so weird lately it’s been all off.

I think that at the very least for the sake of the cats needing a routine, I should keep the apartment dark and stay in bed laying down until at least 7am ish. I will set a series of alarms every fifteen minutes from noon to one, just in case I drift off. That should do the trick and protects me in case I do end up falling asleep. I think… that I should stay committed to resting and letting the cats rest and giving them a semabalance of everything being normal. Cats thrive on routine so that will be good for them.

I guess for now, I will test out a flash card or two (I change the font size to be larger and I want to see what it looks like) and then I will maybe read the news on the iPad or watch an episode of SVU. If I drift off, I drift off. But I won’t plan on it. Alarms are set just in case.

Boo just started snoring so I guess that’s my queue :) catch you later diary

[dulceortega]

A small and swift nod bounced what was once Dulce’s straightened hair turned ponytail in the clip she’d pulled it back in. She was thankful that she hadn’t gotten too preoccupied in helping assist Dani that Melody had gotten out of her site, but she knew that regardless that Julia would handle it. On days when she’s struggled to get out of bed, on the nights when they approached closer to their due date, and now that they had Lainey in the house, Julia would and had always handled it. The last few weeks had been hard, the last few months even brutal, and while things like Melody growing up, Dani cooking dinner or Lainey crying all felt like triggers for Dulce; things that she didn’t want her wife to think about for too long in fear that all the progress they’d made would come crashing down. But one thing Dulce could say with confidence - something she could even take to her grave- was that Julia would do anything to be present for her girls. Their girls. “I was trying to help Dani and honestly she snuck away quickly. I’m glad she didn’t interrupt but it looks like she just needed some cuddles.” She spoke, letting herself offer their daughter a small smile.

“Short work days have always been your favorite.” Dulce playfully winked, reminiscing on the times they could spend alone time together in the afternoon while Dani was at school. It was the prime of their relationship that lasted long until their extended honeymoon phase as their friends had called it. Shared kissed between the sheets when all they needed to focus on was themselves; and while Dulce wouldn’t trade this life they’d built together for anything but sometimes she craved the attention she used to get from her wife when they managed alone time that wasn’t squeezed in between the hours of 8PM and 10PM, or sometimes less than that. Those were the times when their life was fast paced, hours spent at parties with the most high class Broadway stars followed by intimate moments shared in bathrooms, or in their couch as they had barley made it home before their hands intertwined their wife’s’ body. It was blissful, but it was pure love. The same kind of love that the two tried to instill into their children every day. “Though, I meant to tell you. Mellie’s been asking for a ‘Mommy Day’ at the theater. I figured maybe your next show we could make a trip up?” She didn’t meant to put Julia on the spot with the question, but she knew that it would do them some good to get out with their kids. Not only for the kids, but for Julia too. “We can discuss it after bedtime, but I wanted to mention it now before Melody does.” She spoke.

Though the subject shifted as Julia had requested that Melody pick up her coloring books and Dulce smiled. “She does anything you ask her the first time huh?” It wasn’t that Dulce was annoyed, just intrigued. With Dani it hadn’t mattered who told her to do what she’d done it with no problem, and Melody on the other hand was a little more…hard headed. Sometimes if it wasn’t that right person asking her it was like talking to a wall, and while Dulce knew that was just part of her personality, it was primarily part of the reason why the two butt heads so much. Though, Melody came by it honestly. Dulce was just as stubborn as the little girl on most days. “And then, after that maybe you can help me and Sissy cook? You want to help?” She asked, though she knew that in the moment Melody was preoccupied and it was useless, so her attention returned back to her wife and Dani who were actively talking about dance classes. “Dani and I were just talking about hip hop dance and how good she’d be at it. I don’t know if this studio does beginners hip hop but we can always look into it if you think it’s a good idea babe?” Dulce questioned, her hands preoccupied on the counter top closest to the kitchen doorway prepping the chicken. “Oh, and also, while it’s on my mind. When we go to the studio for dance we need to go to the grocery store on the other side of town. They’re the only ones that have the snacks and sauces good for Dani’s diabetes.” She smiled, patting her daughter on the back as she playfully rolled her eyes. Dulce knew that Dani was verging the range of age where she was capable of maintaining her blood sugar on her own, and while she’d proven in more than one way to be good a it, Dulce still worried. There’s been a time when they weren’t sure she was going to make it out and Dulce never wanted to risk that again, especially not now. 

Despite Dulce’s question about helping with dinner, Melody eagerly agreed to help Julia with brownies and Dulce smiled. “If I didn’t know better I’d say she was biologically mine.” She laughed. She loved to cook, but even more so loved to bake and Melody’s love for sweet things always had Dulce joking that she was more like her than Julia, only to be proven wrong again when the tenderness of Melody’s heart would shine through. It was a pure reflection of the wives love for each other, but especially Julia’s and watching it shine through and out of Melody made Dulce’s heart soar. “We actually have some special add ins too like peanut butter chips and dark chocolate and even some marshmallows.” Dulce whispered smiled with a playful wink at Melody. Though as Julia approached her, she kissed her wife’s cheek softly, only letting her smile grow when she asked Dani about a lunch date. “Oh that’ll be fun. I know you two will have the best time.” She smiled. “You know I love planning things so if you need help just say the word.” Though she knew they wouldn’t ask; Julia liked to make these days special to all of them building the day together. It was one of the ways she made it truly special.

The dinner on the stove and the ingredients on the counter called for Dulce to leave the kitchen, so she did, moving towards the living room and fetching her glass of wine. Taking a sip, she stood, watching her family as they all vigorously worked in the kitchen. It wasn’t a moment she saw often, but she was growing to appreciate little things in the moments like this. Though, her mood shifted as she watched her wife move towards the bathroom, and while she’d been convinced something must have been said, she knew she hadn’t heard anything off, so, with her glad now on the counter she moved towards the bathroom, knocking on the door before letting herself in. But without a word, Dulce leaned forward, placing a soft kiss on Julia’s shoulder in an attempt to comfort her. Her face scanned Julia’s for any sort of recollection of something she’d missed and she placed her hand on her right cheek, leaning forward and kissing her forehead softly only to hear the soft ‘I’m okay’ mumbled from her wife. But Dulce knew better and just as she was about to give her permission to not be okay she was met with a kiss and Dulce’s eyes closed, inhaling in the moment as she returned it. “Hi..” she smirked, kissing her back.

Julia's arms wrapped her arms around Melody. The little girl leaned her body into her mothers taking in the warmth and comfort it gave her. Julia's hand rubbed soft circles on her back as her body fully relaxed. Melody had always been sensitive to not only her own feeling, but those who surrounded her. She was cautious of almost everything as well as people. She could sense any disturbance between them and throw herself at who needed her the most. Something about how their daughter relaxed her body onto theirs was so calming. Melody's fingers played with the hem of her shirt as she just lay calmly on Julia. " No, she came up after I had put her down thankfully. She was a little fussy when I put her down so I was rubbing her back until she settled. " Julia remembered when Melody was that small and it ached her heart that she would never be that again, nor would have it. It was in part while she had been holding her so closely. She placed a soft kiss on Melody's forehead who's was tucked under her chin.

" Work was good. We were pretty busy, it died off in the afternoon so I was able to get caught up with paperwork. " She loved her business, she really did. It just was never going to fill that void in her heart for her love of Broadway. That love she had since she was a child went with her mother. She would sit on the side of the stage during her performances, just like Melody and Daniella did with her. Melody LOVED the theater. She always begged to go with her after Dulce let her watch Julia just like she had as a child. Melody's love of the stage started at a very young age. Julia's pregnancy with Melody had been so easy that she ended up finishing her show. Their life here was a lot slower in a way, which she did like but it was nothing that could compare to New York. On the other hand, though this was better for their kids, they came first always. She would always put Daniella and Melody before herself.

Julia looked around as her wife mentioned the coloring books, she didn't mind the mess. She knew that Dulce liked to clean up before she got home, but Julia didn't mind the little things. It made their house feel like more home. "Alfredo sounds amazing baby. I can't wait to try it. " Julia spoke towards Daniella as Dulce explained that she had learned the recipe from a friend. When it came to their elder daughter, they were conscious of what they were cooking. At such a young age she had been diagnosed with diabetes type two. It was a scary time trying to figure out what was wrong with what seemed to be their perfectly healthy three-year-old. They were both thankful that it was manageable at home by eating healthier and making sure she got proper exercise. " Perfect, I'll let her know you would like to take a couple classes. What about you missy. " Julia turned her attention back to Melody who had gone quiet. She stuck her finger under her daughter's armpit to tickle her until she got a giggle. ' I wanna go mommy but I want you and mama to be there. ' Melody said with concern expressed on her face that they would drop her off for the classes and not stay. Which they would never do knowing how shy Melody could be. " Of course, Mama or I will be there. Just depends on who is working, promise. "

Julia told the little girl before getting on her own feet. She was able to tell the little girl was drifting off to sleep on her and wanted to keep her active. She remembered the days just a couple months prior when Melody would come home from school around lunch and they would nap together. It became a routine and something she looked forward to being on bed rest in the weeks following her surgery. She shook herself from that thought now placing the little girl's feet to the ground. " Can you help me out and please pick up your coloring book and supplies? Put them where they belong? " Julia knelt down to Melody's level as she spoke making she that she was clear and precise. " Please put your shoes in their cubby in the closet by the door, okay? While you do that I'll get everything ready and we can make brownies. " Julia spoke needing to keep herself busy but also wanting to make something sweet for those she loved the most. Melody was giddy with being able to bake brownies. It had been a recipe Julia had found a couple years back that was healthier and neither of the girls seemed to care or were able to tell.

Julia watched as Melody ran off to do the couple of chores she had asked of her. Melody was normally pretty good about doing the things she was asked, the trick was to only give her one or two at a time. If not she would get distracted and not finish what she started. Julia made her way over to Dani placing a soft kiss on her forehead. " I was going to ask you, how would you feel about going on a lunch date with me on Saturday? " Their lives had been so chaotic that they had not been able to spend afternoons like this with their girls. It was important for Julia and Dulce to spend time one of one with both of their daughters. Her family meant everything to her, and being away from them even for days was hard. She pulled Dani's hair behind her shoulders as she watched her carefully study the recipe. ' Really? I would love to. ' Daniella said with excitement in her voice of being able to again have one on one time with them. As their girls became older, Julia wanted to make sure she kept that strong bond with them. That they were able to talk to her about anything and everything they were comfortable with.

A smile came across Julia's face as she started to gather the ingredients for the brownies to make with Melody. " Perfect, when you get your phone back tomorrow, find somewhere to eat okay? " Julia spoke as she placed a bowl on the island counter before setting up the step stool for Melody when she came back. Her eyes went to her wife as she remembered this was the last thing she had done before they had lost their baby. Julia had put the brownies into the oven before taking Melody upstairs to bed. Melody had been so clingy that night, one more kiss, one more hug. Julia had stayed up there most of the time while the brownies had been baking. As she had come back down the stairs was when she became so dizzy and passed out. The stairs had been the last thing she remembered. Julia's eyes began to well with tears. " Excuse me. " Julia said making her way to the bathroom to splash a little water on her face but heard the door open and close behind her. " Hi. " Julia said with a broken smile across her face as her wife followed her to the bathroom to check on her. " I'm okay. " She half lied, because it really came in waves. Julia leaned in trying to distract herself by giving Dulce a long kiss. Taking in their moment alone.

[ghost-ghost-baby]

Narcissist (alpha!readerxOmega!Bakugo soulmate au)

An: this is heavily inspired by the song narcissist by younger hunger definitely recommend listening to it!

An: BIG TY TO MY BETA FOR EDITING THIS ABSOLUTE MONSTER OF A FIC WE STAN!

Word count: 3.2k (ur welcome)

Summary: Bakugo being a little shit basically- Mina and Denki r sick of him- reader runs out of scent blockers-

Warnings: omegaverse, swearing, Bakugo being a dick, reader just thinks he’s hot, gets a bit spicy but nothing graphic, non traditional dynamics (subby alphas) drug use (weed)

You were in a familiar room, one you’d come to love since you’d started dreaming of it, and you sat on the bed and waited… any moment now.

“Oi, are you here, shithead?” The voice of your omega was dreamier than it was in real life; his harsh words unable to punctuate the tranquility of your dream.

“I always am, Katsuki!” You chirped, grinning as he slowly faded into existence. The black tank top and jeans he wears make him look far too good, and your brain short-circuited for a few seconds.

“I told you not to fucking call me that!” He growled, but you only laughed. Reaching out to grab his hands before he could stop you, you pull him down so you could kiss him. Any anger he had quickly melted away, and Katsuki had pulled one hand away to rest on your shoulder and pushed back. You got the point, you pulled away for air and leaned back on your elbows as you did. Katsuki followed and straddled you without a moment of hesitation. His mouth latched onto your neck and you let out a hum. With one hand gravitating to tangle in his hair, he gave you another push that had you lying flat on your back.

“Hey-”

“Shut the fuck up, don’t ruin this.” Katsuki bit down on your throat and you squeaked, although he licked over the mark seconds later to soothe it, and only pulled away to kiss you when you tried to talk again. You melted, let your hands wander down to his thighs, and had your thumbs rubbing absent-minded circles. Then, Katsuki was unbuttoning the shirt you had on, hands quickly trailing lower to-

“Y/N! Did you hear what Mr. Aizawa said?” Mina’s voice brought you back from the dream you had the night before, and you blinked at her as you blanked.

“No way I'm working with their dumbass!” Katsuki snarled as Kiri forced him into a seat at your table, and you turned your head to Sero with a questioning look. He usually knew what was going on in class.

“We have a group project for a presentation, Mr. Aizawa picked the groups-”

“Oh hell yeah, all my best bro’s working together? Sounds like fun to me!” Denki leaned over to hug you and Mina, and the pieces started to click together. You were working on an art project, with your mate, who hate-

“How could anything be fun with Y/n around, they fucking ruin everything.” Katsuki grumbled to himself, refusing to meet your eyes despite sitting opposite you. Kiri mouthed an apology to you from his seat next to Katsuki. Honestly, you had no idea why he’d decided to act like… such a brat really, but it was just an act, however annoying it was. The two of you were soulmates, he’d come around, eventually.

“Oh hush, Bakugo, Y/n’s a riot and we all know it! You’re the one who goes to sleep at like, 8pm” Denki came to your aid. The electric blonde then pressed a kiss to your cheek that had Katsuki gritting his teeth.

“So, what's the project, guys?” You flipped through your book to a fresh page, resting your chin on your hand as you waited for the others to speak.

“We have to show the versatility of styles and composition under a singular theme!” Kiri was the one that answered you, and the group immediately started throwing around ideas.

“I think we could do horror, a lot of horror artists have different composition styles and still manage to convey the-”

“Tch, that’s the best you could come up with? I’m not surprised, an alpha as shitty as you can’t be capable of any decent ideas.” Katsuki sneered, but you only smiled at him as the group agreed with your idea. Your omega merely grumbled and hunched over in his seat as the group discussed the different artists you could use as examples.

You’d stayed late to double-check something with a professor, and you were still flipping through your notebook as you walked through the unusually empty halls. You weren’t paying attention to where you were going, and before you knew it you ran into someone, the same someone who shoved you against a wall seconds later, but your fear subsided when you realised it was just Katsuki.

“Watch where you’re fucking going, dipshit.” Katsuki wasn’t even sure why he’d pushed you up against the wall, but being this close to you, touching you… it was..nice…

“Tch, god your scent is so weak, you smell like a fucking beta, how’d I get stuck with such a runt, huh? Some sick kind of joke.” Katsuki’s tone didn't match what he was saying. The way he leaned forward to rub his cheek over your scent gland definitely said otherwise, but you stayed quiet, he always found some excuse to scent you, but he’d usually get embarrassed and storm off if you dared to say anything.

“You’re pathetic, you know? Being this submissive for an omega, are you sure you’re not a beta? It’d make more sense.” You bit your lip when Bakugo pressed a kiss to your neck, only hesitating a moment before he started sucking a mark onto your skin. His words bounced right off of you because all you could focus on was how hot he was and how he’d subconsciously put his thigh between your legs and thank fuck you were on scent blockers, or you’d never hear the end of it.

“Really, you aren’t even going to try and defend yourself? You’re even weaker than I thought.” A growl next to your ear made you shiver, and Katsuki pushed away with a snarl when he was satisfied. He cursed at you again and warned you ‘not to tell anyone or he’d kick your ass’ (he wouldn’t) before he walked away, leaving you to walk home with your head completely in the clouds.

“What took you so fucking long, huh idiot?” Katsuki was on you the second you appeared in the dream, pulling you down into a rather ferocious kiss before you could say anything. He bit your lip when you didn’t open your mouth fast enough, swallowing any protests you would have made, and continued to kiss you until you were dizzy. “I’ve been waiting two hours…” He pulled away to kiss under your jaw, and if you didn’t know him so well you’d miss the insecure tone in his voice.

“Sorry, Midoriya wanted-” You stopped when Katsuki growled, biting down so hard you were surprised he didn't draw blood.

“Why the fuck are you saying his name here, huh? Are you tryna piss me off?” He pulled away to sneer at you. You opened your mouth to explain, but the words died in your throat when he unzipped your hoodie, and any coherent thought you had went out the window when he started to kiss your neck.

Everything was ready. The lounge room was set up, complete with snacks, drinks, and stationery for you and your friends to work on the project. They were meant to be here any second, and you couldn’t help but hover near the door to your apartment. You weren’t used to having people over and it still put you on edge having others in your space. But that thought left your head when a knock sounded on your door. You quickly opened it and were almost knocked over by Denki and Mina engulfing you in a hug.

“Thanks so much for hosting bro!”

“Awww you laid out all these snacks and stuff too! An omega’s gonna be really lucky to have you one day Y/n!” They pushed inside. Denki closed the door as Mina oohed and aahed over the setup, their praise had a slight blush rising to your face as you sheepishly rubbed your neck. Sero was next, quickly hugging you before he joined Denki and Mina, then Katsuki and Kirishima last. The blonde pushed past you without saying hello, but Kiri pulled you into a hug so tight you couldn’t breathe for a second, and was complimenting the setup as you took a seat. You tried to sit next to Mina, but Denki let out a whine and the pair was pulling you down between them before you had time to protest. Denki immediately leaned on you once you were settled. Katsuki couldn’t focus on the project, how could he, when his two dipshit friends were all over his mate. And you weren’t even doing anything to stop them! In fact, you were leaning into their hugs and giggling at every stupid joke they made! It had Katsuki fuming. Kirishima was the only one close enough to smell the angry shift in his scent, and he glanced between his friend and you, slowly putting the pieces together. You really had no idea what was happening, but Denki’s head was on your shoulder, and Mina’s arm around your waist as she asked questions about the project, giggling and pressing a kiss to your cheek whenever you got confused, which happened more than you’d like to admit. The blonde gritted his teeth when Mina’s hand went to your thigh, you were his! Nobody else should ever be touching you like that! You should know better! So when you excused yourself to grab something from your room, of course he made up some excuse about needing the bathroom so he could follow you.

The door to your room closed with a click, and you quickly spun around, expecting to see Mina or Denki, anyone except Katsuki to be honest.

“What the fuck do you think you’re doing?” He was seeing red at this point. He cornered you and made you stumble back until your waist hit your desk.

“Uh- getting more pens-?” You held out the pack of pens with a confused look on your face that only made Katsuki angrier. How were you so stupid? And so fucking cute when you were- he cut off that thought, he needed to focus on yelling at you. Not the way your brows furrowed and how you nervously bite your lip as you waited for him to say something. Wait- were you blushing? Fuck, maybe he should-

“Katsuki? Are you oka-“

“Shut the fuck up, dipshit.” He snarled. Then, catching you both off guard, he leaned forward and kissed you. Your eyes fluttered closed immediately. He’d only kissed you in your dreams, which was nothing compared to this, and you hesitantly placed your hands on his waist. His hands went to your hair to pull you closer, tugging it until you got the message and parted your lips for him. Katsuki let out a hum of approval as he deepened the kiss, why hadn’t he done this sooner? You couldn’t focus on anything other than how much Katsuki tasted like caramel, he didn’t taste like caramel in the dreams. You couldn’t help but whine when he pulled back. Another insistent tug on your hair had you tilting your head back, and Katsuki didn’t waste any time kissing over your neck. You were so lost in the feeling you almost missed the words he growled against your skin.

“You should know better, you’re mine. Other people shouldn’t be fucking touching you like that.”

“Do you think they’re like…. Finally-” Mina made a hand gesture that had Denki cackling, even Kiri cracked a smile.

“I hope so, it’s getting hard to watch all the back and forth.” Sero sighed, dropped his pen, and stretched.

“Yeah, have you seen how mad Bakubro gets though? It’s pretty fun to push his buttons like this!” Denki grinned as he leaned his head on Mina’s shoulder, and she wrapped her arm around his waist.

“I don’t know… Bakugo’s uh… stubborn, to put it nicely.”

“Your scent is weird… are you wearing a different perfume?” Mina leaned her head on your shoulder, arms wrapped around your waist as you glanced at Katsuki. After whatever the fuck had happened in your room, he’d gone back to acting like he hated you, so, you’d kept letting Denki and Mina do whatever they wanted. He had his eyes fixated on the work, and you turned back to Mina with a smile.

“Oh, sorry about that! I forgot to refill my scent blockers and my doctor’s not available until next week.”

“Don’t be sorry, bro! It’s nice, like really, really nice!” Denki came up behind you, throwing a quick glance at Katsuki before he leaned forward, crooning and rubbing his cheek over your scent gland, Mina doing the same a moment later. The pen Katsuki was holding snapped, his angry scent pumping out in waves as he glared daggers into the book in front of him, all too aware of you laughing.

You were hyper-aware of how strong your scent was, this was the longest you’d gone without scent blockers since you’d presented, and you’d lit a scented candle to try and cover it up. It hadn’t really worked, maybe you should light some incense-

“Y/n! Sorry we’re early!” Mina’s hand on your shoulder broke you from your thoughts, and you shook your head before you smiled. Denki cut you off before you could apologize about your scent.

“Damn Y/n! It smells like you baked cookies- oh my god did you bake-”

“Don’t be stupid, babe, it’s just their scent.” Mina shoved him inside, shaking her head as she followed and closed the door behind her.

“Oh! Of course!” Denki nodded, and he and Mina linked arms with you. They walked you over to the couch and sat you all down with grins on their faces.

“Uh… guys-?” You didn’t trust that look, it never leads to anything good.

“Well, since the project is like, 99.5% done-” Mina started, hand coming up to play with your hair.

“We thought we deserved a reward!” Denki interrupted, reaching into his bag and producing a blunt. You felt your own grin forming.

“Oh my god- is that from-”

“Shinso! You know he sells the best stuff on campus, I decided to splurge for my bros!” Denki looked incredibly pleased with himself, and you couldn’t help but tackle the blonde in a hug.

“Oh my god Denki, you’re the best!”

The three of you were blazed by the time the others got there. Sero happily bounced over to share the blunt, while Katsuki and Kiri just sighed and sat down with you. Katsuki’s eyes instantly zoned in on where you were lying on Mina and Denki on the couch. He was oddly silent as he tried to keep his cool, the nagging thoughts that had always been there slowly got stronger. He’d always had to be strong, people perceived him as weak just because of his dynamic, so he’d rejected the thought of being with an alpha, hoping for a beta or omega. Or you. You never made a big deal out of your dynamic, and always treated him as an equal. Then the dreams started. He loved you, he really did! But his whole reputation would go down the drain if he was claimed by an alpha, especially one with such a weak scent and mild presence. So…. he pretended to hate you in public because the two of you had your dreams, where nobody could judge him! Even if they did pale in comparison to real life. But lately… he couldn’t stop wondering… were you getting tired of waiting? With the way you were acting… the thought made his stomach turn and his canines come out. Especially since you had run out of blockers. Your scent getting stronger and stronger as the days went by. You were his alpha! You shouldn’t be scenting other people! Especially omegas! And you certainly shouldn’t be laying on them while you were ignoring him! You hadn’t even said hello to him! You were too busy getting high with those assholes like you didn't belong to him! You were his, it wasn’t fair!

Mina was the last out of the apartment. She kissed your cheek and winked at you as the door closed. The exhaustion set in as you leaned against the door.

“What the fuck was that?” Katsuki growled and made you startled when you saw him by the table. You only shrugged as you went to pack up the stuff on the couch.

“Denki got us some weed because the project was done-”

“Not that, dickhead! They were all over you!” He marched over to you, trying to ignore how good you smelled up close.

“And? We’re not-” You responded, and Katsuki was shoving you before he realized, ignoring the way you yelped as you fell on the couch. You sprawled on your back and glaring up at him.

“Katsuki! What the fuck!” Katsuki didn’t reply, eyes traveling over your vulnerable form. Flush rose to his face as he realized how provocative the position was, causing warmth to pool in his tummy. If kissing was so much better in reality, what would it be like to be inside you? Feel you clench around him and pull his hair when he hit your sweet spot? Would your thighs shake the same in real life when he just kept going? The omega didn’t even realize his scent had changed, he just licked his lips and stared at you with hooded eyes, fuck he wanted-

“Are you okay? You zoned out.” Fuck, when had you gotten up? You were so close now, your scent overwhelming. He never wanted you to go on blockers again.

“Fuck, Katsuki! Katsuki! Are you in heat?” It finally dawned on you. Katsuki’s scent had taken on a sweeter tone it didn’t usually have, and with the way he kept zoning out, it was obvious. Plus thoughts of him on top of you that wouldn’t leave your brain alone. Your question snapped him out of his daze, and the omega snarled at you, stepping back and stumbling when a jolt of pain went through him.

“Fuck off, like you could trigger-” His voice cut off as another wave of pain went through him, causing you to reached out to steady him without thinking. The omega was going to let out a growl but it quickly changed to a whine as it escaped his mouth. You pulled your hand back like it had burned, although your mate’s temperature was so high it wasn’t out of the question. You took two steps back and froze when a feral snarl ripped through the room, dark red eyes pinning you in your place.

“He-hey Katsuki…” Your voice stopped his growling, and it took every ounce of self-control you had to stay coherent as he advanced, your rut already trying to cloud your judgment. Your eyes darted around the room, maybe you could make it to the bathroom? Then Katsuki could ride out his heat and you could talk about it? yeah. Katsuki was only a foot away from you now, the grin he had on was somehow more unsettling than the snarl, and you shook your head to get some of your resolve back. Okay, three, two, one-

You made it maybe ten centimeters before Katuski caught you, and pushed you back down on the couch. He wasted no time sitting on your lap and tilting your face up to look into his eyes.

“You’re not getting away from me, Alpha. I know you want this. I should have done this months ago.” Sincerity shone through your omega’s lidded eyes, and you felt your small shred of resolve shrink away even more. Your hands flew to his chest to push him away.

“Ka-Katsuki it’s just- just your heat, you don’t mean-“

“Don’t tell me what I do and don’t mean, alpha.” Katsuki was back to growling at you. His hands grabbed your wrists, pinned them down, and used his knees to keep them in place. He went back to cupping your face, red eyes boring into yours as he thought of what to say and a growl leaving him whenever you dared to look away. You were so, so obnoxiously pretty, it made it even harder to focus. Katsuki kept getting distracted by little details, like how your eyes shone and you kept biting your lip.

“You’re so fuckin stupid, ya know that? Of course, I fuckin want you, you’re my alpha- I don’t… I don’t care what other people think anymore, I just want you.” Katsuki’s tone was softer than you expected, and you could only gape at him as a blush quickly rose to your face. You knew he didn’t hate you, but hearing him say that lifted a weight off your shoulders you’d been carrying for who knows how long. The moment passed, all the softness went away as Katsuki leaned down to kiss you, and this time you kissed him back without any reservations.

[sunder-soul]

The Last of Your Rules

･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ.    

Part 1 ★ Part 2 ★ Part 3 ☆ Part 4         

Summary: Reader figures out a set of rules to survive navigating their FWB relationship with Tom Riddle, which goes great until he starts breaking them one by one. Wordcount: 3.2k Content warning: explicit sex, language.

･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ.   

You resolve to avoid him for a bit and let whatever he’s clearly going through blow over – but your plan is immediately compromised the following Monday.

“We will be brewing our next project in pairs!” Slughorn says loudly, clapping his hands with a wide grin. “Your partners will be assigned randomly, so please take your seats!”

Everyone falls silent at once, the excitement palpable. You wink at Opal next to you, hoping that she’ll be your partner as Slughorn waves his wand and sends tiny little slips of parchment whizzing across the room onto your desks. You seize yours at once, unrolling it only to see –

Tom Riddle.

You blink. The memory of the kiss immediately comes back to you, and excitement stirs in your chest at the chance to talk to him outside of your meetings, at the hours you’d need to spend together in class for the potion –

You catch your train of thought and horror dawns on you at its implication.

No… have I… did I…

The class is moving around and chattering excitedly to their partners as you quietly slip up to the front of the room.

“Everything alright?” Slughorn asked jovially.

“Yes, sir,” you say quickly, “only – I was wondering if I might change partners, sir.”

“Oh?” Slughorn’s brows raise. “Who are you paired with?”

You hold out the parchment, and Slughorn unrolls it. He looks even more surprised when he sees the name. “You… wish to change partners?” he asks slowly.

You nod.

“Tom’s a capable lad,” Slughorn says seriously, frowning, “a very capable lad. In fact, I couldn’t have picked a better partner for you myself.”

“Please, sir,” you press, trying not to sound desperate. “Is it possible to change?”

Slughorn pauses for a moment longer, and then leans back against his desk. “Yes of course,” he says, waving a hand and nodding. “If you really want.”

“I do,” you say immediately.

“Langley!” Slughorn calls, beckoning the boy forward.

You breathe a sigh of relief as the red-haired boy leaps from his seat and hurries forward. Langley is an idiot, but at that moment he’s a hell of a lot better than Riddle.

“Who’s your partner, Langley?” Slughorn asks him.

“Chester, sir,” Langley replies quickly.

“Tell Chester that he’s with Riddle,” Slughorn says busily, “you’re being reassigned.”

Langley glances at you curiously but with unmistakeable glee. “Yes, sir,” he says with a barely concealed smile.

You resist the urge to roll your eyes and turn back to your seat – only to find Riddle’s piercing gaze fixed on you from the back of the room. You hesitate automatically, and have to physically wrench your eyes off of him as you hurry away, trying to ignore the feeling of his lingering gaze for the rest of the class.

･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ.  

That evening in the library whilst you’re bent over your Potions notes, Riddle suddenly yanks back the seat opposite you and sits down. “Did you ask Slughorn to change partners?” he demands colourlessly.

You try to hide your surprise – he never sits with you in public. “Yes, of course I did,” you say calmly.

“Why?” he asks sharply.

You quirk a brow. “Are you joking?”

“No, I am not,” he says mechanically, lacing his fingers together and giving you a very cool look.

“Riddle,” you say dryly, leaning towards him. “That assignment would require that we spend hours together working on that potion, I didn’t think that would be a particularly good idea.”

“Why not?” he asks at once, eyes not leaving yours.

You scoff and lean back. “Don’t be obtuse.”

His eyes narrow ever-so-slightly. “Because of our arrangement?”

“Exactly,” you mutter.

Riddle’s expression is unmoved. “What exactly did you expect would happen?” he asks flatly.

You sigh, frustrated. “Listen, I’m not trying to imply that we’d bloody fall in love or anything,” you mutter, seizing your quill again, “but it’s still just a stupid idea.”

Riddle is silent, and after a long moment you glance at him. He’s just as composed as before, but there’s a strange tension to his posture. “Riddle,” you say carefully, “are you… alright?”

It’s as if you had snapped your fingers in front of his face; Riddle stands at once. “Yes,” he says coldly. “See you in class.”

He’s gone before you can even say goodbye. You stare after him, utterly bemused. He’s such a nutcase sometimes…

･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ.  

Tonight, 9pm.

You stare at the note in shock, your head telling you, screaming at you that the smart thing to do is to crumple it in your hand and ignore him.

But…

You refold the note and nod as you pick up your quill again, knowing without checking that his eyes are on you.

He’s already there when you arrive. Riddle’s fingers curl around the strap of your bag and pull it off your shoulder the second you get the door shut, tugging up your jumper and dropping it carelessly to the ground. His fingers dance across your blouse and the buttons spontaneously spring apart one after the next as he walks you back against the wall, and seconds later he’s unclasping your bra with deft fingers. Riddle’s expression is hungry. It makes you nervous in a very good way.

Riddle picks you up again and you wrap your legs around his hips at once. He presses his mouth to your collarbone, trailing downwards and leaving burning electricity behind, and then his lips gently close around your nipple and you gasp. Riddle’s eyes flash up to yours at the sound, and you watch, hypnotised, as his lips tease you there, staring mesmerised at the dark waves of his hair above his burning eyes, at the fine angles of his brows, his lips, his eyes, his mouth on your skin –

Riddle lifts his head and you pull him into a kiss, hungry for him, too. The intensity is almost comforting, far away from that dangerous slowness.

When you’re done, Riddle doesn’t even hesitate once his uniform is back to its usual immaculate tidiness. “Goodnight,” he nods politely, leaving at once.

Back to normal, then, you think as you wander back to the common room. That’s a relief.

But that night in your bed, the memory of the way he’d kissed you comes back again, that slowness, that softness, that hot, gentle pressure…

Warmth spreads through your chest and you frown deeply, rolling over and punching your pillow into place.

That needs to stop. There’s no way you can catch feelings for Tom Riddle.

･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ.  

Today, 12:15.

You slide the note into your pocket, thoughts whirring. It’s hardly the first time he’s suggested you meet during the day, but with the past week you’d had, things were decidedly getting weirder.

･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ.  

You bite Riddle’s shoulder hard as pleasure overcomes you, listening to it overcoming him too, your body slick with sweat and your mind blank with nothing but the sound of his breath, tense and sharp through his nose. His hands are against your face, turning you to him and kissing you again, and you’re delirious, kissing him back without even thinking, your arms tightening around his neck and pulling him closer. You’re still hungry for him like your appetite can never be sated, your legs wrapped around his hips where he still has you pinned against the wall. His hands hold you to him firmly, his lips moving against yours in that slow, dangerous way –

You realise what you’re doing very suddenly, pulling back at once. You stare at each other, and you feel a surreal exhilaration like you’re teetering at the edge of a cliff.

“I should go,” you whisper, not moving.  

Riddle nods slightly, not looking away. He doesn’t move either.

You can’t stop yourself. Your eyes drop to his lips again and then back up as quickly as you can – but not fast enough to escape his notice. Riddle’s eyes flicker and he slowly leans in again, stopping right before your lips, watching you like a hawk.

It’s a bad idea.

It’s a very bad idea.

Breaking the rules is already making some very confusing things stir in your chest, but... Riddle’s lips are kiss-swollen and slick, his hair tousled from where you’d been carding your fingers through it, his dark eyes hooded and burning. You’ve never wanted him more.

Fuck it...

You close the final inch and kiss him hungrily, and his hand comes up to your jaw and pulls you closer, slow and hot in that way that made heat curl in you stomach. You sigh, your arms tightening around his neck as he tilts his head to kiss you deeper.

“Riddle,” you murmur after what felt like an eternity, pulling back, “I… really do have to go.”

Riddle’s eyes dart between yours, and then he nods curtly and lets you down.

He leaves without a word and you’re still nearly late to Herbology.

So that’s Rule One and Two just completely in shambles, you think, shaking your head as you speed towards the Greenhouses. What in Merlin’s name is going on?

･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ.  

The confusion only triples in Potions that very afternoon.

Tonight, 8pm.

You gape at the note.

Riddle wants to meet twice in the same day? This is getting ridiculous. The weird behaviour, the frequent meetings, the dangerous feelings growing tenaciously in your chest… It makes you all the more certain that something very weird is going on, and there is absolutely no way you’re going to meet him.

“Have you been listening?”

You jump, hastily looking around at Langley. “Huh?”

“Are you going to…” he gestures at the ingredients in front of you that you’re supposed to be preparing.

“Oh right,” you mutter, slipping the note into your pocket and seizing your silver knife, slicing the Deadlyius mushrooms into thin slivers at lightning speed.

“Langley,” you say through gritted teeth, “if you add moonstone powder to the potion at this stage, you’ll make the entire cauldron melt.”

“Oh,” he frowns, putting down the moonstone. “But… the instructions say –”

“To mix it fourteen times counter-clockwise, and then add the moonstone.”

“Oh,’ he says again, reaching for the ladle.

You seize his wrist. “Counter-clockwise, Langley.”

“Oh.”

You manage to stop Langley from utterly ruining your potion before the bell rings, and you leave it simmering in the backroom for you to resume on Monday.

“Good God,” you mutter to Opal as you leave, dragging your hands down your face, “Langley is absolutely hopeless.”

“No sympathy,” she scoffs, “you could have been with Tom Riddle, and you chose to give that up.”

You don’t reply, glaring stonily at the floor. She can’t know that being with Riddle would be a hundred times worse for an entirely different reason.

･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ.  

Saturday morning breaks over the Castle with a light snowfall and an icy chill in the air that puts a spring in your step, but your good mood is threatened half-way through lunch.

“Excuse my interruption.”

You look around from your conversation with Felicia and Opal to find Riddle with an intimidatingly composed expression on his face, his hands clasped tidily behind him. Your friends start giggling again, whispering to each other behind their hands – which both you and Riddle ignore.

“Yes?” you say slowly.

“Could I speak with you a moment, please?” he asks politely, stepping to the side and gesturing to the door. Felicia and Opal erupt into even louder giggles as your brows shoot up.

“Er… sure,” you say slowly, standing and follow him from the Hall, viscerally aware of the many pairs of curious eyes watching you go.

Out in the Entrance Hall, Riddle steps swiftly towards the dungeons and down the stairs, and you follow him down to the broom closet where you usually meet. He wrenches the door open and stands aside, glancing down the corridor with a tense expression.

“Riddle, what –”

“After you,” he interrupts coolly, indicating through the door.

You hesitate, suddenly rather intimidated. Slowly you step past him, and Riddle shuts the door smartly behind him.

“What’s going –” you begin.

“Where were you last night?” Riddle interrupts again, tone sharp.

You stare. “…What?”

“Last night, I asked you to meet me,” he snaps.

“I didn’t want to,” you frown.

Riddle glares at you intensely. “You didn’t want to,” he repeats contemptuously.

“Is there a problem?” you ask, crossing your arms over your chest.

“Why didn’t you want to?” he demands, stepping closer.

“Geez Riddle, I’m not obligated to have sex with you whenever you want,” you snap.

Riddle falters, his brow furrowing at once. “That’s not –”

“I know you rather famously have very little interest in my life, but I do actually have one you know, I can’t be on your goddamn beck and call whenever you want to let off steam,” you continue angrily, gesturing in frustration.

Riddle looks extraordinarily taken aback. “I didn’t mean –”

“You’ve been acting weird for ages, what the hell is going on?” you interrupt, glaring at him.

Riddle blinks, and then his expression becomes impossibly composed. “I don’t know what you mean,” he says coolly, standing up straighter.

“Oh? Don’t you?” you narrow your eyes, stepping closer.

He doesn’t crack, his eyes impervious as they flick between yours.

“I’m going to go back to lunch,” you breathe, “I’ll see you later.”

“Wait,” he says sharply, catching your arm as you try to pass him.

“What?” you snap, turning to him.

Riddle hesitates. Suddenly you realise exactly how close you are, feeling the tension shift, seeing his eyes drop to your lips –

You both lean in at the same time, your hands immediately tangling into his hair as you kiss him hard and he pulls you close. He’s ravenous again, insatiable, the most demanding you’d ever seen him, and all too soon he has you on the brink, pushed up against the wall of the closet with hard thrusts making you dizzy with pleasure, his lips covering yours as you finish like he’s consuming the moans he’s drawing from you – but when the waves of pleasure fade, the kiss does not.

Riddle’s hands slide up your hips, kissing you slowly as you breathe hard, as your eyes finally open and you draw away. Riddle stares at you, and you at him.

Suddenly, it clicks.

“This… isn’t enough for you anymore, is it?” you say quietly.

Riddle freezes. A long, tense silence passes. “What do you mean?” he asks coolly.

“Is that why you’ve been asking me to meet you so much?” you ask carefully, watching him. “Is this not filling your appetite like it used to?”

His expression is taut, his hands unmoving on your body and his eyes slightly wide. After a very long pause, he finally speaks. “No,” he breathes. “It’s not.”

“Maybe this isn’t what you need, then,” you say quietly.

His brow furrows again.

“We should stop this,” you say carefully.

“No,” Riddle repeats sharply, very quickly.

You don’t bother trying to hide your surprise at the intensity of his response. Riddle’s jaw tenses and he leans in again, his lips pressing hard against yours, but you push him away by his shoulders. He exhales in frustration, glaring at you.

“What we’re doing won’t make you feel better, Riddle,” you say slowly. “It’ll always leave you hungry.”

“Why?” he snaps, looking irritated. “It didn’t used to.”

“Maybe it used to be enough.”

“Why do I still want it, then?” he breathes, leaning in aggressively. “Why do I want…” he trails off, something working in his jaw in the way that usually means something’s really frustrating him.

Oh.

Oh I see.

“Riddle,” you begin cautiously, “have you… ever…”

“What?” he demands, eyes narrowing.

You let your head fall back on the wall. “Have you ever been in love?”

Riddle reacts like you’ve electrocuted him, drawing back sharply and staring at you with open hostility.

“I don’t think you’re in love with me, don’t worry,” you say quickly. “I just mean… this is sort of a cheap imitation of that,” you gesture between the two of you. “Maybe you should think about looking for something… real.”

Riddle looks at you suspiciously, but with something undeniably (and reluctantly) curious. “What do you mean?” he asks slowly.

“It’s different when you’re in love.”

“Different how?” he demands at once.

“Have you ever been touched like that?” you cock your head.

Riddle hesitates, looking strangely… nervous? “Like what?” he says quietly, watching you warily.

It’s a bad idea.

It’s a very bad idea.

You reach your hand up to his face as slowly as you dare and very gently let your fingers trace up the curve of his cheek, his warm, soft skin just barely textured with the faintest pull of stubble, before you reach up further. You softly brush his hair to the side of his forehead and let your fingers push through it slightly. He has lovely hair – well, all of him is lovely, but his hair in particular, thick and soft and dark. You’d always liked touching it, though this is different, of course. This isn’t fiery and filled with desire, intense and hungry. This is reverence, feather-light like he’s something precious that would break if you touch too firmly.

Riddle’s eyes are fixed on yours, and as you meet his gaze again something you don’t care to name stirs in your chest. You gently place your palm against his cheek and lean in, hesitating at the last second, wondering exactly how bad an idea it is. Riddle’s expression hasn’t changed, his eyes flicking between yours. You blink slowly, gaze dropping to his lips, and then you push forward and close the last millimetres between you, kissing him very, very softly.

The dangerous feeling immediately swells up inside you, coursing even stronger when Riddle takes a long breath and lifts his hand to your face too, holding you to him as his lips move gently on yours. You wrap your legs tighter around him but the kiss stays slow, warm, gentle, dangerous –

You reluctantly draw away, but only just. It’s very hard to ignore how fast your heart is beating as you met Riddle’s gaze, dark and burning. “Like that,” you whisper, cheeks aflame.

A long silence falls as he stares at you, as you stare back, trapped beneath his gaze.

“Why is it different?” Riddle asks quietly.

You swallow nervously, knowing that you need to get out of this situation as fast as possible before your inconvenient feelings become completely unignorable. “I…” you whisper, unable to answer. “I don’t…”

Riddle blinks, his brows drawing together slightly, and to your horror he slowly starts to lean in again –

“I need to go,” you say hastily, looking down and breaking his gaze. “I – I have to do extra prep for Potions. Bloody Langley screwed ours up so bad.”

There’s a very painful silence.

“I see,” Riddle says mechanically, before letting you down.

You’d never felt awkward whilst tidying up before, but you certainly do then.

“I’ll see you on Monday,” you mutter to him, escaping out the door as fast as you can. Your cheeks are still warm and your heart is still pounding, so you beeline straight for the dorm to hide until your stupid reaction fades. If you come back from seeing Riddle looking like that, Opal and Felicia would never let you hear the last of it.

･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ.  

Part 1 ★ Part 2 ★ Part 3 ☆ Part 4      

@the-almond-dinger 💕 

[bwbatta]

six - confessions

Abstract: Draco and you are just friends so doing him a favour and pretending to be his girlfriend wouldn’t effect your friendship right?

Pairing: Draco Malfoy x reader

Warnings: Swearing, slight angst

Word count: 2960

A/N: I’ve been waiting for this one, turn it upp! ...I won’t lie, i’ve been putting off writing this purely because I don’t want to stop writing this. Anyway, the final part is finally here and I’m so happy to be sharing it with you all! 

Series Masterlist | Main Masterlist | Part 5

Draco signed his name quickly and looked back at the letter he’d written. It was simple enough to get his point across, yet the repercussions from sending this could be huge. 

The blonde heir was adamant though. If this is what it took, then he would gladly accept whatever consequences came his way. He could figure it out, he always did. 

Taking a breath in to help stabilise his thoughts and nerves, he quickly put his quill down before he wrote anything else that wasn’t needed. Reading it through once more, he made sure his words were enough for now. 

Father,

I apologise for not responding sooner to your previous letter, I was at a loss for a while as to what to write.

I understand our family values and as much as I uphold them for our family’s benefit, my relationship or any of my relationships are my choice. Whilst she is not pureblood, she is not muggleborn either and both of her parents have magic, which is why I ask you to at the very least consider giving Y/N a chance.

With respect, I will not determine my relationship on your opinions, especially since you haven’t met her.

You understand there aren’t many things I would go against you on, but this is something I feel particularly strongly about. 

Regards, 

Draco

Nodding his head, he quickly folded the letter and attached it to his family’s owl. With a screech, the bird took off. 

All Draco could do now was wait.

“Please?! You’re the best person at charms that I know, you would be my favourite person on earth?!”

“Blaise-”

“Y/N please, Flitwick might push for me to be kicked out of Hogwarts if I don’t pass this test”

You snorted unattractively as you walked down the corridor, arms riddled with books. On your way to the Herbology greenhouses for your afternoon lesson, you were blitzed by Blaise who had been trying to convince you for the last five minutes to help him write his essay which was due in a couple days time. 

Blaise and you had nearly made it into the greenhouses when Professor Sprout stopped him at the door.

“You’re not in my class today Mr Zabini, I suggest you get heading towards your own class before you’re late.”

The elder witch gave him a stern look to which he smiled at, trying to lower her strict exterior. 

“I just need to talk to Y/N about something really important really quickly, Professor. It’ll only take a minute?”

“No” she rolled her eyes at the boy, “you can do that in your own time.”

“But, Professor-”

“No buts Zabini-”

“Alright Blaise, I’ll do it” you finally caved, seeing as the boy would most likely be reduced to ash from Sprout’s harsh stare otherwise. 

“Astronomy tower, 8pm?”

“Wait-”

“Okay bye!”

Without another word he turned and rushed off back inside the castle, heading to whatever his next lesson was, leaving you partially annoyed, partially awkward at the look Sprout was now sending you.

“Inside” she cocked her head towards the doorway and with a defeated look you headed into the greenhouse. 

You hadn’t been back to the Astronomy tower, despite classes, since that fight between Draco and you and you weren’t too keen on returning. Blaise however, had given you no choice in the matter as you probably wouldn’t see him until that time you’d agreed to meet. This meant you’d have to suck up your anxieties about the tower and get over yourself. 

If only it were that easy.

Your free period was rather quiet today you reckoned but you couldn’t put your finger on why it was so quiet? 

The twins weren’t around and neither were Harry and Ron, yet that was normal since you were studying in the library with Hermione. Though Hermione didn’t really talk much when you two studied, something still felt off.

Not to mention the other thing which was bothering you was how Blaise acted earlier? He was normally the most relaxed person you knew, but his earlier rushed and fretted actions also seemed wrong.

You snorted at the thought in your head; imagine if he was trying to set you back up with Draco at the astronomy tower later?!

Another sigh left your lips as you continued to try and figure out what else felt off. Hermione’s eyes darted from the essay she was writing to you sat opposite her. 

“Is there something bothering you?”

You met her stare awkwardly and shrugged slightly. 

“I don’t know, does something feel off to you?”

“What do you mean?”

“It’s too quiet, you know? I can’t put my finger on what it is though.”

“Maybe it’s because that blonde tumour isn't attached to your side anymore?!” Hermione snorted as she turned back to her work, leaving you staring at her with an unreadable expression. 

Ignoring the remark of how the witch had described Draco, she was right in the way that he did used to surprise you while you were studying. 

Was that it? You were missing him being near you?

You hadn’t really spoken to the Malfoy, only small comments in class when you were next to each other but apart from that, he wasn’t constantly next to you anymore and that bothered you. 

You had to admit you did like fake dating Draco, but that was over, it was a joke, a favour, nothing more. So why the hell would you accept anything to go back to him annoying you, him being at your side constantly, or his arm around you 90% of the time?

Then you froze.

You knew exactly why.

Holy shit, you loved him. Like actually loved him. 

Slowly starting to freak yourself out, you sat back in your chair as your mind whirred around that fact. 

He’s Draco. 

He’s one of your best friends and now everything was so messed up because he’s Draco.

Stubborn, bratty, arrogant Draco.

Who likes Draco?!

And then it hits you again. You do, you really really do. 

Because he’s Draco.

Because he cares about you and would do anything for you. Just like you’d do anything for him. He might be stubborn, but so are you. He might be bratty and spoilt because of his parents, but he actively spoils you just because he can. And he might be arrogant to everyone else, but you know how humble he could be and acts around you. His reaction after you opened your Christmas present proved that enough. 

Holy shit. 

These feelings are going to ruin whatever’s between you, friendship or not, because how the hell could you keep this to yourself? How the hell could you not tell him you loved him?

The only thing was... you were the second person to ask yourself that today. 

Draco paced in the tower, a letter held tightly in his hand as he waited for you to show up. Guaranteed it wasn't 8pm yet, but he was still so anxious for when you did actually turn up. Were you going to turn up?

A lot of things had flown through his mind today, some putting him on edge as to whether his plan to get you back would work, yet nothing had made him as anxious as when the letter arrived from his father earlier that day.

It was slightly wrinkled now from how much he had fiddled with it in his hands and with a frown, Draco tucked it back into his pocket, forcing himself to take a long breath as he did so and run his hands nervously through his hair.

Not even a moment passed before he heard the door below slam shut and your footsteps approach. A brief flash of panic flew through his body like he’d been electrocuted, what if this was a bad idea? What if you didn’t want him like he wanted you and he would just look like a complete idiot?

All the thoughts in his head however vanished as soon as you reached the top step and your eyes locked on his. 

Neither of you said anything at first and the silence was almost deafening.

“Fucking Blaise,” you rolled your eyes at yourself. “Earlier I bet myself he’d do something like this.”

“It was actually my idea”

“...I see” 

“Surprised?” 

You snorted

“No.” You hid your grin at the look of offence present on his face, “I knew one of you would come up with something like this. I had my money on Blaise as he was the one I spoke to earlier. Despite how much you love being mysterious and complicated Draco, you’re like an open book to me.”

The wizard let out a snort, he had a feeling she would figure something was up. They really did know each other well.

The silence stilted in the air again and felt heavy despite the fresh air surrounding them. 

You looked down, avoiding the blue eyes that watched you. Despite being in love with him, you had no idea what to actually say to him. Luckily he took the lead.

“It was really stupid.”

You frowned, before you forced yourself to glance towards him, eyes catching on how he was looking at you.

“What was?”

“The fact we thought we could pretend and fake an entire relationship with no consequences.”

You didn’t say anything. 

“I mean let’s be honest,” Draco scoffed a laugh, “we really thought that everything would go back to how it was before? That was stupid. Also the fact that the whole ‘having a fake girlfriend’ thing wasn’t really working for me.”

He paused to assess your reaction for a moment before continuing on. 

“We were great as a fake couple, sure. We were also great at being friends, I mean... that was before I kissed you and fell in love with you.”

Your breath caught in your throat at the confession. A smile grew faintly on his face as he took in your reaction. After realising you weren’t going to bolt, he took a couple steps closer until he stood right before you, his toes almost touching your own. 

“This whole fake dating thing was so stupid in so many ways except for one; how it made me realise how much I genuinely want to be your boyfriend.”

Draco shrugged sightly like it was no big deal, but inside he had to remind his lungs to work.

Why hadn’t you said anything yet? Maybe because he can’t stop his mouth from talking? Should he stop talking? His mouth opened again before he could stop himself.

“I want you. I want us. But I want it for real, not some half-assed, pathetic excuse of relationship which is all just an act and makes us question where we stand with each other.” 

His voice lowered to a whisper but you heard him perfectly. 

“Draco... I want nothing more than to be with you.”

“You do?”

“Yes, but I can’t help the fact that I’m not a pureblood and your parents won’t accept me-”

“Wait, okay, hold on.”

Digging his hand into his pocket, he fished out the crumpled letter and attempted to flatten it out slightly. 

“I sent my father a letter in response the one you read the other day and I got this back earlier today. Just... just read it.”

He held the letter out at you with such a serious expression causing you to frown, you took it from him wondering what was in it. Opening the parchment, your eyes immediately flicked back to the blonde once more, only to find him watching your every movement.

“Draco,

I don’t believe you understand the seriousness of what you’re asking from your mother and I. You have a duty to this family to uphold and despite the notion that you wouldn’t disobey me with much, this is still a vital factor of those duties.

Nevertheless, you expressed your seriousness for this girl, coupled with your mother’s bickering about at least meeting her, I will give you one chance. We will meet her if she values the seriousness and significance of our values. If she does not however, then you will end whatever you have with her. 

You understand in the near future, things will change. You need to be as prepared as possible.

Regards,

Lucius Malfoy”

You read the letter once through, then twice, then once more. Your mind was in a flurry at the words, taking them in and the weight they held. Draco’s parents had agreed to give you a chance, however it came with a price and one you were in two minds about taking. 

On one hand, you could be with Draco and support him through whatever hell was coming your way, as long as you abided by their blood purity mania, which, if Harry was right, meant Voldemort. On the other hand, it meant not having the Malfoy boy in your life.

Your eyes finally left the words and flicked back up to meet Draco’s own. His expression was unreadable as he waited for your reaction.

“Well, that’s intense”

“You can’t really expect anything less from my father.”

“I gathered that.”

Your eyes landed on the elder Malfoy’s name once more and you bit your lip slightly. 

“I said once I would be willing to get mixed up in this for you, and I stand by it, Draco. I don’t know whatever's going to happen in the future but I know I want you by my side through it.”

“I can’t ask you to do that-“

“You’re not asking me, I’m telling you I want you and I’ll do whatever it takes to be at your side.”

“Y/N-”

“Draco, I love you, let me do this for you. I can play whoever your parents want me to be.”

Draco didn’t say anything more but stared at you with a half smile on his face. Your eyebrows knitted together as you caught sight of it, not really sure where the expression came from. Talking about faking your views on blood purity and Voldemort wasn’t really a cause for smiling.

“What?”

“Say it again?”

“Say what again?”

“You love me.”

You realised then. You’d told him you loved him in amidst all that but you hadn't even realised it. Well, that’s one way to admit it. 

“I love you,” you said with no hesitation as a smile grew on your own face. “I want you, for real. No fake relationship, just us.”

As quick as you’d finished speaking, Draco’s lips were on yours. It was chaotic, unscripted and messy, but it was real. 

Your hands slid to the back of his head, fingers burying themselves in his hair as his hands gripped your waist tightly, pressing you to him. He kissed you with such passion you swore your heart stopped for a split second.

How the hell had you both faked this for so long?!

Taking a break, he pulled away but rested his forehead on yours, not wanting too much distance. 

“If you’re all in Y/N, so am I. I’ll protect you with my life, you may’ve been my friend first, but you’re everything to me now.”

His lips pressed against yours again, much softer this time like he was trying to memorise and convince himself you were really there. That this was really happening.

“Draco Malfoy, I’m all in.”

You were surprised the next day for two reasons.

One; for how many people had actually bet on Draco’s and your relationship. George got his five galleons back from Fred again after the news reached them. He happily took the money from his brother before lifting his glass to you from across the hall in thanks. 

Both Crabbe and Goyle owed Blaise 10 galleons, though you supposed he had an unfair advantage, (not that you’d tell the duo). 

But the second thing which surprised you was the letter you received at lunch from the headmaster himself. 

Dumbledore had barely even looked in your direction, let alone spoken to you personally, so the note you got from him asking to meet him in his office later spiked your anxiety. 

“I’m sure it’s nothing,” Hermione shrugged before lowering her voice to a whisper. “It’s probably something to do with the DA or Umbridge.”

“Hermione, I didn’t even think he knew I existed, now he’s asking me to come have a chat?”

“Just go, you’ll never know otherwise and you’ll keep fretting.”

The rest of your day passed quickly and you found yourself before the headmaster’s office later that evening. Taking another quick look at the note in your hand, scribbled at the bottom was a comment about him liking sherbet lemons which stuck out to you.

“Sherbet lemons?”

The gargoyle surprised you by jumping out the way, opening up the staircase to you. Without another thought, you climbed the stairs and knocked on the wooden door. 

“Come in.”

Pushing the door open, Dumbledore turned to face you as you entered the room. With a smile, he greeted you and offered you the seat opposite him as he took his own.

Sitting, your knee started to bounce while your anxiety kicked in wondering what the hell was going on. 

“Y/N- can I call you Y/N? Relax, you’re not in any trouble at all, don’t worry.”

“Can I ask then, why am I here sir?”

“Well, I actually have a job for you if you’re interested? I understand you’re in a unique position where you’re willing to do anything possible to be with the young Mr Malfoy.”

You immediately frowned, how the hell did he know that?!

“What kind of job?”

“A job to join the Order of the Phoenix. I want you to act as a spy for me within Voldemort’s ranks.”

[mochii0park]

metanoia; 01 | kth

Title: Metanoia

Pairing: Taehyung / Reader

Part of series: Waterlilies and Japanese Bridge

Genre: angst I collage!au

Pairing: student!reader x photographer!taeyhung

Word count: 4,7k

Summary: Vante, a household name among photographers became known for his minimalistic photography style that came along with his secret persona. Never showing his face on his own exhibitions fueled the public’s desire to learn more about him which skyrocketed his fame. While preparing for his next exhibition Vante went missing. Disappeared into thin air and even now a year later was never found.

Author’s note: I am very conscious of any grammar mistakes. Although I have read this chapter three times I am sure I’ve missed some so bare with me. 

On another note, I have switched the dates of the chapters for Saudade and Metanoia. Since this story got more attention compared to Sauade I’ve decided to write it before the date.

This is my first attempt at writing on this platform and I hope it will reach out to a wider range of readers and catch your interest. Any feedback is greatly appreciated.

Taglist: @ggukkieland​ @honig-und-millch​ , @deliciousdetectivestranger ,

Masterlist

Metanoia masterlist

< intro | next chapter >

You sink into the overaged draggled yellow chair, catching second-hand embarrassment at the sight before you. The boy walked about, his thrusts were not enough to keep the neon hula hoop from falling. He attempts to fumble his way out of the mess, but it was too late. The left ankle twists itself and before you know it, he hits headfirst against the wooden flooring. The professors rush towards him, medics following behind. The boy tries to pull himself up but fails his body slumping against the stage. To your left Mingi snorts, stuffing his face with popcorn amused by the scene playing out.

“I don’t mean to sound rude or whatever, but people need to search up the meaning of talent before their eyes skip to the word show.” Minnie ruckles her nose, her mouth loop sided.

“I find this highly entertaining,” Mingi speaks up, mouth full of food. He takes a sip of the cold beverage rested in his lap and shakes the mixture before swallowing.

To his left Yeonjun shudders at him, “Talent or not I would rather replay that scene than watch Mingi be a slob. It makes me want to bleach my eyes out.”

Mingi rolls his eyes ignoring Yeonjun as he pops more popcorn, oblivious to his own weird antics. Although the four of you are friends for years, Mingi managed to take you all by surprise with his uncanny behaviour.

The second act starts and suddenly you contemplate your university choice. Reasonably the overbearing staff of your university wanted the timid first years to feel welcomed hence this so-called show. In hindsight, you think a friendly party would’ve been just as good.

Halfway through the act, you feel a light tap on your shoulders, professor Kim Namjoon stands there like a sore thumb in the mass of students’ bodies. With his hovering height, freshly dyed purple hair and the rimmed glasses on the bridge of his nose he was sure to stand out. He shifts his footing from one to the other foot anxiously waiting for you to follow him, few students commenting on the disruptions that his appearance caused.

You observe him for a second, accompanying him out of the theatre into the cold November air. He fumbles through his leather briefcase before fishing out a small, crumpled flyer. Opening it he shoves it into your hands while tweaking his glasses.

“I have a favour to ask you Y/N. There will be a course taking place here and I would love for you to attend it with your peculiar friends.” He says emphasising the word peculiar.

You knew that Mingi gave Namjoon the creeps even though the latter denied it.

“No.”

You push back the flyer spinning on the balls of your feet ready to join your friends.

“Y/L-…”, Namjoon groans, “Do it for your brother-in-law.”

Widening your eyes, you look at him shaking your head.” This isn’t the time to use our family relations to bribe me into a stupid course.”

“Did you even read what’s it about?”, you take the flyer from his hands skimming through it.

Photography course

Length: 10th November till 10th June

Time: Friday, 6pm -8pm

Attendance: Third years and above

Equipment not needed for the course

Your eyes pause at the date, laughing releasing itself from your chest. Surely Namjoon was kidding when suggesting this. You were in your last year which meant you would soon be flooded with work for your final project. In conclusion, there was barely enough time for you set foot out of your studies let alone attend another one of the university’s poor attempts to make a course for students to bond over.

“You understand I’m in my last year. I don’t have time to go out and have fun with my friends. How in the world did you think I would fit a whole-ass course?”

Namjoon releases a breath running a hand through his thick hair, desperation evident on his face.” I am sorry to have to do this, but I am cashing in my favour.”

You become stiff mouth agape, incoherent vowels coming out of you. It takes you a few seconds to gather your thoughts, “you promised to not cash it in. You gave me your word.”

“And you gave me yours.” Namjoon retored sassily, finger pointing at you, “I won’t tell Sunmi if you promise to do me a favour when the time comes.”

Pushing your tongue against the palate, you try to control the boiling anger.

The incident happened four years ago, back when you were still figuring out your college life. Namjoon and you were acquaintances, sharing one elective course called German Literature. Needless to say, both of you suffered greatly.

By the end of the year, you noticed your sister piqued Namjoon’s interest. Grossed out by the idea of your older sister engaging in any kind of relationship/activity with a twenty-three-year-old, you kept your distance until the faithful day.

Choi San was the synonym for the devil himself. With his fiery red hair and dazzling cat-like eyes, he lured you into his messy life of illegal parties and binge drinking. You still find yourself cringing at his pathetic excuses of professing his undying love to you when it was all under false pretences. His eyes bearing into your naïve soul, pulling your heart out and wrenching it until your friends came to pick up the pieces.

Sitting in the police station you counted down minutes before your older sister would burst through the door and finally decide to disown you. With your head nested between your knees you suck in the tears threatening to spill, the euphoria from the alcohol long gone. You’ve dialled Mingi’s number first, the others were a no go when it came to answering their phones. He picked up in a matter of seconds. After explaining the situation, you figured he would bring his own parents to bail you out instead Namjoon comes first, after him a stressed Minnie trying to keep up the pace with him and a Yeonjun who’s pulling his masks further over his nose in a lame attempt to be unrecognizable. Mingi idly meanders behind them in his pyjamas with not one care in the world. Namjoon pulls a small amount of money handing the police officer and not long after you were free.

At that moment you’ve truly recognized your friends as the people you wanted to keep in your life forever. Namjoon jokingly said he would someday cash in his favour. Little did you know the joke would get over your head.

“You’ve waited for four years to cash it?”

He shrugs and nods lightly. Quickly he composes himself, washing his features of playfulness and switching them up with hopelessness. “It’s really important for me that you and your clique of friends attend this course. Professor Seojoon organized it-“

At the mention of your favourite professor, your eyes light up making Namjoon shudders. The little “crush” you harboured didn’t go unnoticed by him. Putting his hands on your shoulders he gains your attention again before continuing, “his brother is the one to hold the course so you must come. I will put in a good word for you all. Maybe he will go easy on you during quizzes.”

You roll your eyes knowing fully well that you didn’t need Namjoon’s intervention although it was greatly appreciated. Putting the flyer in your back pocket you throw a thumbs up to Namjoon, “Well Minnie and I don’t need any favouritism and I am almost certain you can’t do much for Yeonjun and Mingi seeing as they are in different departments.”

“Oh?” Namjoon’s brows shot up at the revelation, totally dismissing the idea that you know each other any differently than through the classes you attend, “I thought Yeonjun was in the literature department, as for Mingi it’s far-fetched but I didn’t want to sound rude.”

“Actually, Yeonjun is in the Vocal department while Mingi is in the Physics and Astronomy department. He’s also on top of his class, both are.”

Namjoon seems stunned at the information you threw at him, but he recovers swiftly, “Bunch of nerds.” He chuckles at his own jokes before both of you bid goodbyes. You slowly make your way to the cafeteria mind set on pursuing your friends to join you and Namjoon running to the staff meeting hoping to extinguish the chaos caused by the talent show.

Pushing past the mass of people on the campus your sneakers squeak against the pavement, the chatter between the students becoming louder as you push the cafeteria doors. Making your way towards the table in the further left corner you spot Yeonjun’s eye-catching hair. The pink shade fits well against his pale skin making him noticeable from afar. The boy throws a piece of chips at Mingi, the latter catching it mid-air.

The rustling of your chair brings them out of their bubble. Minnie plops her elbows on the table, hand supporting her cheek as she lays it there, eyes staring at you amusingly. Mingi continues to catch Yeonjun’s chips, his attention now slightly focused on you. “How was the talk with professor Namjoon.”

“I need a favour to ask you.”

“Last time you asked for a favour we had to bail you from jail,” Mingi adds face void of any emotion causing Yeonjun to almost choke on the piece of chicken from his plate. Minnie reaches for his head hitting him hard on the back.

“That was four years ago for God’s sake.” You yell, a few students turning bothered by your loud voice disrupting their meal.

Slumping further into the seat, cheeks reddened from the heat of the sudden attention you gained you say quietly, “there is a course taking place this year and I would love if you could attend it.”

Mingi was the first to read the flyer once you push it in the middle of the old table. He hums a couple of times and gives you a thumbs up, unlike Minnie who scoffs.

“A whole semester? Y/N you know this is impossible to juggle this with our final project. As much as I would love to participate you know what you’re asking for is too much.”

You bite your lower lip remembering Namjoon’s words. “I know but professor Seojoon is organizing it, and don’t you think having him on our good side would mean a lot?”

Minnie shrugs and pops the strawberry into her mouth. “I understand, but it’s on Fridays. The only time I can spare for parties and clubs, and you’re asking me to spend it studying something I am not even remotely interested in?”

You turn towards Yeonjun knowing if he agrees Minnie will crumble under the pressure of your group. He scans it quickly and shakes his lightly head from left to right before agreeing to accompany you making Minnie collapse her shoulders in defeat.

“Fine but if it takes too much of my time I am signing out.”

“I love you guys so much.”

“Cut it with the sappy shit, I have piano lessons.” Yeonjun gets up telling you goodbye before he disappears in the ocean of students his pink hair no longer visible. A distant scream could be heard a few seconds after, “I love you too.”

You smile feeling the love of your friends.

“We love you too.” Mingi gets up and places a carton of freshly squeezed apple juice in front of you sending off a small smile. Just like Yeonjun, he’s gone.

                        -

Nose buried deep into the book; Taehyung tried his best to mute out his brother’s lame attempts of starting a conversation he never intended to finish. Legs resting on the polished marble table he did his very best to further fuel Seojoon’s irritation. The older one pacing back and forwards provoking Taehyung’s headache.

“If you would just listen to me.”

Kim Taehyung detested surprise, especially those he didn’t catch on early. This one though topped the cake. “There is no need to listen.”

“Quit being stubborn.”

“Oh, the irony.” Taehyung looked up catching his brother’s burning gaze,” contrary to your beliefs, I must say you are the one who’s stubborn here. When a person asks for space and time you give them that instead of forcing them, wait sorry what was the word again? Yeah, lightly pushing them into holding a course. One which they never asked for or showed the desire to hold.”

“You needed a little push in the right direction.”

“Arranging a one-year course isn’t a push you idiot,” Taehyung shouted; the book was long forgotten and tossed aside on his couch. His yell echoed in the empty room causing Seojoon’s to scowl. He found comfort in a small armchair adjacent to the marble table. “You can’t bury yourself in books and spend your days in the atelier. It’s not healthy Taehyung.”

“I don’t remember asking for advice.”

Seojoon was on the verge of giving up, letting the course get cancelled before it even happened hadn’t it been for the twelve people that signed up and Namjoon’s effort to recruit them.

“Look-“he takes a deep breath calming himself, “You can think of it as a one year course, but in reality, it’s eight months. When you count Christmas, New Year, Easter you can cut one month coming to seven months in total. I’ve gone all out for this course, please don’t make me go and explain to my higher-ups why it’s cancelled before it even started.”

Taehyung shut his eyes trying not to feed the growing frustration inside him. Seojoon takes the time to look at his brother, the embodiment of pain. The eyes that used to shine brightly at the sight of new opportunities were now dull and empty, almost as if his soul left the body. It tore him apart to see Taehyung like that, powerless and what added more to his pain was the inability to help him.  

“It’s been a year since I’ve held a class.”

“I know you Taehyung. You are a man of many talents and there is nothing that can convince me otherwise. You need to move forward and face the fear you’ve been holding onto. It’s been a year. Nobody will judge you.” Seojoon’s eyes soften as he walks up to his brother ruffling his hair, hoping that his sincerity got through to him.

“I don’t know Joon.”

Before Seojoon could even start talking Taehyung shakes his head and moves hurriedly reaching for the knob. Seojoon takes a step towards Taehyung, but he doesn’t even give him a chance to speak as he runs right out of the door leaving him alone in the atelier.

The water drips from Taehyung’s wet hair down his face creating a false comfort, the sound of water coated a perfect cover to hide his emotional baggage. It became a habit of his to seek solace in the bathtub surrounded by lavender soaps that Yuna bought. A tradition carried on from their mother to them. The scent took Taehyung back into his childhood spent in his family home in Busan. Carefree of responsibilities and the heavy burden the world carried.

He recalls the delicate touch of his mother’s fingers untangling his locks while singing Elvis’s song can’t help falling in love. Her voice heartening Taehyung as he wept over a dispute he had with his second brother Hyungsik. The vivid memory of his mother placing a kiss on the crown of his head before wiping away the tears from his cheeks.

“Siblings are there to teach you about life,” she whispers softly, “They teach you what it means to be kind, to be fair and to know you will not always be right. They teach you about teamwork, conflict resolution and most importantly Tae they teach you what it is to love and to be loved.”

Opening the door of Seojoon’s study, Taehyung is greeted with a sight to behold. Leaning against the door frame he watches Yuna and Hyungsik dancing in the middle of the muddled room, furniture pushed aside to create more room. They attempted to follow Yuna’s new choreography, Seojoon’s seated in the leather armchair grading assignments although he would glance up occasionally laughing at the duo. More like laugh at Hyungsik’s failed attempts but he didn’t need to know that. Noticing Taehyung’s presence, Yuna runs over linking their arms and pulls him forward oblivious to the slight tension between him and Seojoon.

“Idol my ass, “she scoffs at a gasping Hyungsik, “Taehyungie I need a dance partner for my new choreography. Hyungsik can’t even learn the basics.”

“Not my fault the younger generation goes overboard with their dances and outfits and singing. In my time we relied on our charms, and not how you call it? Fairy ending? What is even that?”

“It’s when idols finish the song, and the camera pans on of them giving them some more love and screen time. Right?” Taehyung looks at Yuna for approval. She places Taehyung’s hand over her shoulder, linking her arms around his waist while he kisses her temple and puts his cheek on top of her head.

“Admit it you’ve gotten old Hyungsik.” Seojoon derides.

That was enough to motivate Hyungsik to crack his fingers and reach for the tablet, “Give me the goddamn tablet. I’ll show you who’s old.” burying his nose into the gadget, he replays the video repeatedly.

By the time he made it through the first segment of the dance, Taehyung was sure he could blindly replicate the choreography himself.

“Couldn’t you ask one of your professors or other idols in training to help you?” Taehyung asks as the two observe Hyungsik’s rusty moves.

“One friend is busy finishing school projects and Jungkook-a has too many events lined up to help. I haven’t seen him since last Friday and I don’t feel comfortable asking Jimin-ssi to practice with me.”

“Isn’t he your professor?”

“Yes and no. He helps the idols which have already debuted in our entertainment company, that’s Jungkook. Jimin-ssi does occasionally step in when other professors are prevented from teaching. But his job is being a full-time professor at the EQ Royal Dance Academy.”

Taehyung nods, the information flying over his head as Hyungsik messes up a move and topples to the floor. He erupts into fits of laugher for the first time in weeks and Seojoon is suddenly reminded what’s it like to be happy. He knew bringing Yuna home for the weekend would do Taehyung some good. The sight warms his heart, his siblings bickering loudly, breathing some life into the old room. Resting the assignments on the nearby table, he sits up to join them. Catching Taehyung’s gaze he looks towards the boy, brows raised.

“I’ve thought about it and-” Taehyung stops for a second, but Seojoon’s soft gaze prompts him to continue. “I’ll take the job.”

“Well, you better get ready because it starts in two hours.”

“What?!”

                       -

There were many ways you could spend your Friday night, like partying for instance yet here you are sitting in your car listening to Minnie whining. Mingi’s soul stuck somewhere on his iPod the second he set foot in the car, his head bobbing to the music blasting from his AirPods. Yeonjon was the only one not present. Due to his idol actives, he was held back by his vocal coach, but he promised to be there for the second lecture.

Placing your analogue camera on the desk, you tug your hair into a ponytail mentally preparing yourself for two hours of dullness. Minnie sits to your right while Mingi takes the chair to your left. The three of you seating yourselves in the front of the classroom, Namjoon’s words bunch of nerds playing in your head.

Shaking the thought away you see the watch tick eight pm as the door swings open.

When Namjoon told you professor Seojoon’s brother would hold the course you had expected a man either older than him or somewhere around his age, not a handsome make you take a double look type of a man; two or three years older than you.

His features were nothing short of a Greek god. He stood head and shoulders over you even when you were seated, confidence radiating from every fibre of his being as adjusts his bag over his shoulder. Pushing his brown curls away from his face he allows you to look at it. Perhaps you were exaggerating but you never saw such a gorgeous man. Straightening himself up you take notice of his attire for tonight’s lecture. An orange blazer draped over a white shirt brought out his sun-kissed complexion paired with the same-coloured trousers. A type of anonymity laced itself with every step he took in your direction, his stare a mixture of coldness and determination.

He comes forward, eyes scanning each one of you before he sets his gaze on you. It lingers there for a second, his expression unreadable before he breaks it.

“Hello, my name is Kim Taehyung and I’ll be your lecturer for this course.”

For the first time, you see Mingi’s focus entirely on Taehyung. His presence demanded to be felt and a part of you was sure he knew it. Taking the camera in his hand he turns towards you.

“I assume you have at least once taken a photo, whether with your phones or camera. Moreover, I am positive you have attempted to make an aesthetic photo for your Instagram feed. How many of you were successful?” laughter filled the lecture hall,” The goal of this lecture isn’t to make a photographer out of you nor to help you improve your skills. The point is to make you fall in love with photography. The rest will come easy.”

He walks around the desk and opens an old leather binder. Walking towards your table he places it in front of Mingi allowing the three of you to peek at the content of it. There neatly stored in a plastic sheet were his photos. Mingi pushes the portfolio in front of you, allowing easier access to both Minnie and you. Slowly leafing through the pictures, you stop in total awe. Eyes trailing over a simple photo of a ray field, caught somewhere in later November or early December judging by the snow. The contrast was striking, the clash of the colours and the depth of field creating an imaginary line between the ray and the sky.

Taehyung observes your dumbfounded expression, intrigued by your sudden amazement he ambles to your side. He rakes over the photo, which was a thereby sheer mistake, panic rushing through him. In a reckless attempt to stop you from further prying into the photos he grasps the portfolio out of your hold knocking over your camera in the process. It hits the floor shattering the lens into pieces, the film rolling down until it stops near his feet. Cursing himself for his abrupt action, he looks at you. Your eyes drift from the broken camera to Taehyung’s face.

He hurriedly squats picking the pieces, analysing the damage. Beyond repair.

“I am so sorry. I-” he says placing the parts on your table trying to come up with more words of apology.

“It’s alright.” You shuffle awkwardly in your seat not liking the spotlight put on you.

“I’ll be sure to repay you the coasts of a new camera.”

You shake your head; the camera was already outdated, and you were sure Sunmi would let you borrow her digital one from the gallery. “It’s fine.”

Taehyung puts his lips into a thin line, the confidence he marched beginning to leave his body. Although you showed no anger or resentment towards him, he still felt the need to apologize. Swallowing the awkward moment, he paces towards the centre.

“Today we will start with simple terms such as ISO, Aperture and Shutter speed. Three things you should get familiar with.”

Fetching his Nikon camera from the case he turns it around. Swirling the button on the upper part of the camera he adjusts the mode to manual. Pushing another button towards himself the camera shows three circles in the middle of the screen.

“The first circle is shutter speed. That’s the speed at which the light of a camera sensor is exposed to light when taking a photo. Slow shutter speed captures the blur of subjects in motion. It’s valuable for night and landscape photography. On the other hand, high speed allows you to freeze a single millisecond in time.”

Pointing to the middle circle he continues. “This is an aperture, the opening through which light passes through the lens to enter the camera. Its size can be modified to control how much light reaches the sensor.”

Lastly, he shows you the third button. “ISO represents the sensor’s sensitivity to the light. The higher the number, the more information will be captured in other words the picture will be brighter.”

Taehyung fumbles with the camera for a few seconds before he focuses it on you and with a click and shutter of light, he takes your photo. With no time to recover you feel a blush creep at the thought of how the picture turned out. “As you can see this is the perfect setting for the indoor portrait. Now if we put the shutter speed high and the ISO low-“

He again takes a picture of you turning the camera screen to the students. The photo was dark, your features barely visible but still your figure could be distinguished. “This is an underexposed photo. Now if we set the shutter speed to let’s say 1/40 and places the ISO high-“

Expecting his move this time, you look up at the camera. Taehyung halts his action for a slight second before he presses the button. Looking at the photo, the brightness is overbearing. “This is an overexposed photo.”

He places the camera in front of Mingi, Minnie and you allowing you to take your time and compare the three photos he took. “Why am I showing you this? Because for your next assignment that’s what you will do. You will take three photos of the same object. The object you choose should be something that left a great impact on you. That can be your family, your friends or an inanimate object such as phones, books etc. The choice is yours.”

Pulling out stacks of paper he leaves them on the corner of his desk.” These here are today’s study notes. I don’t expect you to write down notes while in the class, but I do expect you to finish your assignments. That will be all for today.”

The students began leaving the room each taking one paper, Taehyung stood there, hands in his pocket looking through every pupil that passed by. Minnie was first in line, her flirt mode on. You see them exchange a few words, Minnie’s behaviour suddenly going from sweet to sour in seconds. You dally your way to the desk aware of his gaze burning holes in the side of your head.

“Sorry, Y/N was it?” You peek up not expecting him to spare you a second let alone address you.

“Yeah?”

Taehyung scratches the back of his neck awkwardly.” I am sorry for what happened to your camera. I know you said it’s fine, but I feel responsible for it. I would feel better if you let me repay you by buying a new camera or at least participating in the coasts.”

“No, really it’s fine.” You laugh as you say it for the fourth time today.” I will borrow my sister’s camera for the course. If I do find myself in a need to buy a new camera, I will let you know.”

Before Taeyhung could protest you nod politely and leave the room. Biting his lip, he couldn’t help to feel bad about the wreck he made knowing full well how much an analogue camera costs nowadays. Taking the Nikon one from your table he swipes through the photos deleting each one before he pauses on the last one. It was the first black and white photo he took of you.

Your eyes were focused on Taehyung, although taken aback by the light they held their composure your mouth pulled into an affiliative smile. The white light made your baby hair stand out in the black background. For an unexplained reason, Taehyung felt a small tug, one he couldn’t pinpoint the meaning of. Shutting off his camera, he exhales through his nose and throws the bag over his shoulder.

The first lecture was done, thirty-three to go.

all rights reserved @moochi0park

[onceupon]

London Boy

summary: Y/n finds herself all the way across the pond, trying to escape OBX. But much to her surprise, a certain someone might get in the way.

pairing: Rafe x reader (just an intro in this part, we’ll get there dw)

warnings: swearing, drinking, some mentions of anxiety?

word count: 3.2k

a/n: if you’re a sucker for a slow burn like me, buckle up and enjoy the ride. I plan on this being multiple parts and this is also my first time posting so please be gentle with me lol :’-) (not canon Rafe)

You huffed as you dragged your extra large and definitely overweight luggage down to the pickup area at Heathrow airport. You had just landed in London where you’d be going to school until the holidays.  You had decided to apply for, and actually got accepted into, your high school’s British exchange program. Every year Kildare Academy gave the option for 15 seniors to study for half the school year at Westheath Academy in London, a private boarding school, while 15 kids from their school came to yours. Normally, you wouldn’t have dreamed of leaving your friends and family for that long, not to mention missing out on half of senior year at home. But ever since the drama that erupted during the summer after your junior year that ended with you being shunned by your “friend group” (where they really ever your friends to begin with?), you practically jumped at the opportunity to get as far away from the Outer Banks as possible, albeit for a little while.

You didn’t know at all what to expect at Westheath, you had skipped the predeparture orientation at Kildare a few weeks ago, but you didn’t care - didn’t care who was going or what Westheath was like, all that mattered was that for the next few months you could finally breath. It was the clean slate you desperately needed, a chance to finally be around people and places you hadn’t known since birth. Sure there were going to be 14 other kids from Kildare there as well, but you had zero intentions of sticking with your OBX peers over the next few months. You weren’t going to let your small town suffocate you for a second longer if you could help it.

You double checked the license plate on your phone screen as the Uber you ordered pulled up.

“Y/N?” the driver called out from the front-right window (god that was going to take some getting used to.)

“Yep!” you smiled, huffing as you tried to pick up your luggage and step off the curb. Thankfully the uber driver was quick to your rescue, effortlessly lifting your suitcase into the trunk of the car. Leave it to you to overpack without even thinking to leave room for all of the clothes and souvenirs you were certain to accumulate - oh well, an excuse for a new suitcase you supposed.

Not in the mood for small talk, you were relieved that the Uber driver silently read your mind, playing a pop station as you both respectfully ignored each other’s presence. You anxiously tapped your thumb on your phone, eyes flicking between the screen where you watched your route progress and the view out your window of townhomes, pubs, and countless strangers passing by.

You hadn’t felt anxious about leaving for London the entire first half of junior year, so why was your stomach and head simultaneously churning now? You were so excited to experience a version of life that was the opposite of everything you were trying to get away from - a version of life that involved British accents, buzzing city life, and endless possibilities. But it was all of a sudden dawning on you how unfamiliar it all was. As much as you hated to admit it to yourself, no matter how far you ran, you would never be able to fully separate yourself from OBX. That damned small beach-town would always be a part of you, an inextricable thread in the fabric of your life.

The Uber pulled up to a halt in front of your destination. You hesitantly glanced out your window as you double checked the silver number on the building. Yep, 25 Brampton Rd - you were here. The Uber driver graciously lifted your suitcase out of the trunk for you and as he pulled away you let out a long breath - your fresh start was waiting behind the doors in front of you.

You rang the doorbell to the lobby, the security here no joke. You were soon buzzed into the building and you shakily pulled your suitcase in behind you, desperately trying to calm your nerves to no avail.

“Hi,” you croaked out as you approached the man seated at the front desk. “I’m- uhh here to check in to my apartment- uh I mean flat… I think… I’m with the Kildare Academy exchange,” you rambled, cheeks flushing with embarrassment. Despite your best efforts, your anxiety was taking over.

The man gave you a sympathetic smile. “Name please?”

“Y/n L/n,” you replied, pulling your lips into a sheepish straight-lined smile as you mindlessly tapped your fingers on the handle of your suit case.

“L/n, L/n, L/n,” the man quietly muttered under his breath as his pen traced over a list of names. “Ahh here you are. Alright Miss L/n, here is a fob, this lets you into the building, now this key lets you into your flat, you’ll be on the second floor - apartment 2C, and this key is for your individual room,” he began to fire off at you as he rounded the desk and came to grab your suitcase, beginning to walk as you hastily followed suit. “This packet will tell you everything you need to know about our building here - wifi, laundry, trash days,” he shoved some papers in your hand as you both entered the elevator, him pressing the button for the second floor.

You emerged on to your floor and a few steps later you two were at the door of your new home, which the man quickly unlocked gesturing for you to step inside. “And this, Miss L/n, is your flat for the next few months with us here at Westheath. Your room is the second right down the hall there and I believe you’re the first here. Two of your flatmates who are yet to check in are from Kildare, such as yourself, and the other two are students of our own here at Westheath. You know I’m surprised how early you are, classes don’t start until next week! But nevertheless I’ll let you get settled,” you stood staring blankly at your new surroundings, more or less registering the words this man was firing off at you.

“I’m Richard by the way, if you ever need anything you know where to find me,” the man extended his hand toward you.

“Thank you,” you smiled, accepting his handshake.

“Welcome to Westheath,” he smiled back and just as quickly was turning on his heel and back out the door before you could get in another word, leaving you in your new flat by yourself.

You slowly walked through the empty place, meandering through the kitchen and living area, down the hall, peaking into the bathroom, and then finding your way to your room. It certainly wasn’t the type of living arrangement you were used to back home - your family lived on Figure 8 in the Outer Banks meaning you had grown up surrounded by mansions and luxuries. This place was small, simple, and yet it was cozy and well… perfect. It was the exact opposite of your Figure 8 life and that alone was enough to make you love it. You smiled, content, as you sank on to your empty bed, taking in your new room. You had a nice sized desk, a decent shelf, and a wardrobe. Simple and sufficient. You could get used to this. The room was starkly barren, but since school wasn’t set to start for another week and no one was here yet you made a mental note to go on a little mission to find some plants and decorations to bring the white box that was your room a bit more to life.

——-

Three days had passed and still your other flat mates had yet to show. You were starting to wonder if they ever would or if you’d end up living in this flat all by yourself. Your room was now decorated, you had found some cute posters in a shop you had wandered into, some plants in another, and string lights in a third. You had acquainted yourself with the grocery store around the corner and the drug store down the street and you’d even gone on the tube all by yourself.

Being on your own these last few days had been decidedly therapeutic, leaving you unable to contain a cheesy grin every time it hit you that you were actually here, in London, far far away from OBX. But you couldn’t help feeling a little lonely, with a passing hello to Richard every time you left and returned to the building being your main source of human interaction these last few days.

You laid on your bed as you debated the decision you were about to make - you would’ve never dared to use Tinder back home. You knew virtually everyone on the island and would’ve been absolutely mortified to match with anybody there. But hey - you were in London baby! This was a fresh start and nothing was off limits. You sighed and gave in, downloading the app and quickly making a profile. You must’ve rearranged the order of your pictures at least a dozen times before you finally decided it was good enough. You started to swipe, an endless supply of British boys at your finger tips. You couldn’t suppress a chuckle at how funny the whole concept was, your inbox already flooding with cheesy pick up lines from your matches. You spent the next hour going back and forth with these boys, silly, meaningless, flirty conversations - god it was so much easier being a flirt through a screen, you would be positively flushed in the face in person, unless you were drunk of course (your drunk self was a dangerously confident flirt for sure).

Liam: are you free tonight? Down to grab a drink and chat?

Oh wow. Straight to the point wasn’t he. You knew the point of the app was to eventually get off it and meet up with someone, but now that you were met with the opportunity, your stomach was flipping upside down. Fuck it, what do you have to lose?

Y/n: yeah that sounds great, I’m in Hammersmith if you wanted to go somewhere there?

Liam: perfect so am I (: 8pm at The Ladle. See you there xx

Pure adrenaline coursed through your body as you started doing your hair and makeup, throwing clothes all around your small room to find the perfect outfit that was cute but simultaneously made it seem like you weren’t trying too hard. You threw your wallet and keys in your purse, chugged the glass of wine you had been casually sipping on by yourself, and quickly headed out the door before you could overthink it and change your mind.

——

You nervously approached the bar that Google Maps had directed to you, not sure what you were getting yourself into, but you had already walked all the way here so you’d be damned if you didn’t see it through.

“Y/n?” a voice called out to you. God, hearing your name in that accent sent shivers down your spine.

“Yeah that’s me, Liam?” you questioned back, staring up at the fluffy browned-hair boy approaching you.

“That’s me,” he winked, extending his arm out to you which you nervously grabbed, as he led you into The Ladle, spotting an empty table for the two of you.

“So Y/n, what are you doing here in London. Something tells me you’re not from here?”the boy across from you smiled as you two got settled in your seats.

“Hmmm I wonder what could’ve ever given it away,” you replied with a sarcastic smile, American accent in full force. “But I’m here for school, on an exchange at Westheath Academy.”

“Oh shit, that means we’ll see each other around. I’m finishing up my last year actually. And somehow you’re the first American I’ve had the pleasure of being on a date with,” he smiled with a devilish grin that felt like it was burning into you, you hoping the flush on your cheeks wasn’t too obvious with the dim lighting.

“Lucky me,” you smiled back, faking a sly confidence as best you could despite the fact that you were all nerves on the inside. Dating was not something you were familiar with, having maybe gone on two back home, if those even counted.

“First round on me, what are you drinking tonight Y/n?”

“Umm a vodka cran is fine,” you replied to which you were immediately met with a scoff.

“No way babe, you’re in a pub in England now. Should’ve figured as much coming from an American like you,” he chuckled with a shake of his head, his fluffy hair bouncing with it. “I’m getting you a pint,” he asserted, walking over to the bar and giving you a moment to breath and collect yourself. You hated beer but weren’t about to put up a fight, at this point you would down just about any alcohol in order to get some more liquid courage in your system.

He quickly returned, placing the tall glass of golden-colored liquid in front of you.

“Cheers, to new school mates,” he winked extending his glass up to yours.

“To new school mates,” you smiled back, bringing your glass to clink with his, taking a long swig and trying not to grimace at the taste of the liquid going down your throat.

——

The night passed by quickly, you and Liam going through three rounds of drinks as you both laughed and bantered with one another, your nerves all but dissipated by the alcohol now coursing through your bloodstream. Heck, the beer was even starting to taste… good? God you barely recognized yourself anymore, but in the best possible way. One by one you were letting the closely guarded walls you had built up over the years in OBX fall, and you were feeling better than ever before - you felt free.

You and Liam stumbled back arms linked to the building you found out you were both living in, Liam on the fourth floor. You rummaged for the fob in your purse and you both got on the elevator, Liam instinctively pressing both your floor numbers. The elevator dinged opening to your floor, Liam turning to you with a cheeky smile.

“See you around, Y/n,” he winked. Why did you find that so attractive, or maybe it’s just because you were slightly drunk.

“Goodnight Liam,” you smirked back, blowing him a kiss as you walked out the elevator, the doors closing behind you.

You couldn’t help but smile like an idiot as you unlocked your flat and stumbled into your room, immediately collapsing on your bed. London. It was definitely going to be an adventure.

——

You were woken up the next day by the sun peaking through your window. You yawned and let out a big stretch, still giddy from last night’s date. It’s not like you thought you had just met your soulmate or something, you both kept the evening light, mainly joking and flirting as you downed drinks. But god you couldn’t remember the last time you had that much fun or ended a night feeling so confident and carefree. You were embracing every ounce of the euphoria you were getting from your new life.

You slipped out of bed and made your way to the kitchen, still rubbing the morning crust out of your eyes. Just as you got a pot of coffee going, you heard the distinct sound of a key turning, startling you as you realized it was coming from outside of your flat’s door. You cursed at the fact that you were about to meet a new flatmate while in your flannel pajamas and messy bun hanging halfway off your head, but mainly you were excited to finally have some company.

“Dude it’s no Figure 8 living but fuck it I’ll live anywhere to not have my parents breathing down my neck these next few months,” you heard a voice say, now in the hallway of your flat.

You immediately freeze. That was a male voice, definitely a male. Of course it makes sense now that you think of it, everyone in the flat gets their own room so what does it matter if the flat is co-ed. The thought just hadn’t crossed your mind, you automatically assumed you’d be living with all girls.

“Yeah man, anywhere that’s 1,000 miles away from Ward sounds like the perfect place to me,” another male voice laughed in return. Ward? Ward Cameron? That couldn’t possibly be who the voice was referring to because that would mean you were living with- and before you could even finish your thought you were standing jaw slightly parted staring at Rafe Cameron and Topper Thornton  in front of you. Two of the most popular guys at school.

You weren’t really friends but your families knew each other so you inevitably saw one another at kook events every now and then. You couldn’t help but feel intimidated by them. You always told yourself you didn’t care about boys like Rafe and Topper or about fitting in with their crowd, yet you always became nervous in their presence.  They were cool. They partied a lot, were athletes, and had girls tripping over them, which you couldn’t fault considering anyone with eyes could tell they were attractive, but you’d never have the confidence to be so bold with guys like that. Unless you were drunk of course. And unless you were the new confident and carefree version of yourself that you had been on your date last night with Liam.

“Yo Y/n, no fucking way, I didn’t know we’d get to live with girl,” Topper smiled at you with a teasing grin.

You were suddenly acutely aware of how disheveled you look and how you weren’t wearing a bra under your thin pajama top.

“Uh hey w-what are you guys doing here,” you managed to choke out. That confident girl from last night had disappeared as quickly as she had arrived, leaving you now feeling winded in front of the two boys from your hometown. Why were you getting so flustered?

“Just on a little exchange program from Kildare, maybe you’ve heard of it,” teased Rafe sarcastically, a smile tugging at his lips, holding back a laugh at how caught off guard you looked.

“Yeah no yeah of course,” you stuttered, “I guess I just wasn’t expecting you two to want to sign up for it.”

That’s when you realized the obvious. Every year there was always a number of spots reserved on the exchange for athletes, and Rafe and Topper were two of Kildare’s star soccer players.

“What and get to miss an opportunity to play at Westheath and go to Premier League games all semester? No shot,” laughed Topper.

“Maybe you should’ve gone to orientation after all, roomie,” joked Rafe as he picked up his bag following Topper down the hall to their rooms. Rafe Cameron noticed I didn’t go to orientation?

You let your face fall in your hands with a groan only audible to you. You quickly picked up your head and shook yourself off, pouring yourself a cup of coffee as you tried to ground yourself from your frazzled state. Looks like escaping OBX was going to be harder than you thought.

---

Part 2

[bobohu4eva]

Pink Lace - Chapter 5

Characters: Baekhyun x Reader

Genre: College AU, stripper AU, fluff, smut, slow burn

Summary: Baekhyun, a philosophy professor with mysterious wealth, got himself completely fucked over a girl who can’t let him into her life.

Word count: 4k

Warnings: sex work, mentions of sexual assault, adult themes/situations, eventual smut

Tag list: @smolbeanmika @leave-me-in-the-summertime @totallynerdstuff @bbhmystar @nana-banana @kimyhappy @thegreatandi @geniusloey @deligxt @baekswifey @bbhyun506 @lovebuginlove @bellamendoza @baekyeonoreo @bobohumyonlyboo

Masterlist

After your conversation with Baekhyun Monday evening Tuesday was spent desperately trying to get Baekhyun off your mind, with little success. He’d asked you if you liked him like that, and you couldn’t tell him no. Hell, you knew in the back of your mind that the answer was definitely yes, you just couldn’t bring yourself to say it to his face. 

As much as you did like him, the prospect of starting something with a customer who was also your professor was still terrifying. What if you two got together and people found out? Or what if things started to go south and you were still stuck with him as your teacher? 

Despite your other schoolwork, and cleaning basically everything you possibly could, your mind just kept racing with every different possible scenario for if you did tell Baekhyun how you felt. And most of them were quite unpleasant. He could lose his job, you could make class absolute hell for yourself if things didn’t go well, and so on. Different possibilities played themselves out in your mind over and over, and there was little you could do to stop it. 

However the thoughts that stuck with you the most were the ones where things didn’t end badly. Thoughts of his arms around you, his comforting words whispered in your ear, and the gentle touches of his pretty hands on your skin. As much as you fought it, the attraction was there. 

The way your mind bounced between thoughts was stressful to no end. Every time you tried reasoning with yourself, you just thought about how good he made you feel when you were alone together. 

Baekhyun was always so willing to be vulnerable with you, it made you feel appreciated. He was so open about his feelings, and honest with his intentions towards you that it made it difficult to push him away. You wanted to be able to show him the same kind of vulnerability as well, but the possibilities if you did still frightened you too much. 

You knew you wouldn’t be able to go on like this forever, sooner or later you had to figure out what to say to him. 

Your essay was plaguing you as well. You’d tried to start it on several occasions, but Plato’s writing was so old timey and incomprehensible you didn’t even know where to start. It also didn’t help that every time you tried to start writing, all you could think about was what Baekhyun would think. The idea of turning a shitty paper in for him to read and grade made you feel sick. You knew you were shooting yourself in the foot putting it off but you just couldn’t bring yourself to start it either. 

“You’ve cleaned everything in the apartment. Twice. What’s with you today y/n?” Mia asked as she walked out of her bedroom and into the common area, finding you once again wiping down all the surfaces in the kitchen. 

“I’m trying to distract myself, was that not obvious?” You knew what was coming next. 

“Baekhyun still on your mind?” 

Yes. He was. In every possible way, good and bad, and you couldn’t stop it. 

“I think I do like him.” 

“See! I knew it!” You rolled your eyes at her. “Anything exciting happen yesterday? Did you decide to keep the money?” She asked, sitting down at the dining room table, you sitting down across from her. 

 “I’m keeping it, I tried giving it back but he told me some stuff and turns out he doesn’t need it after all.” 

“So he IS rich?!” 

“Yeah... although not from anything cool or fun. His rich parents died recently.” 

“Oh shit, that sucks. That must’ve been an awkward conversation.” 

“Not really. I don’t know why but talking to him is getting easier and easier. I even stayed after he told me I could go.”

“You really must like him then, damn. Can’t blame you though, he is hot.” You shot her an angry look but you both knew she was right. “So what are you gonna do about it?” 

“Do about what?” 

“You liking him. He obviously likes you a lot too, so what happens next?” 

“Nothing. He’s my professor.” 

The look she shot you next said something reminiscent of ‘are you fucking serious’.

 “Oh come on y/n this guy is hot, and rich, and super into you. Even if he is your professor you can’t pass up a fling at least.” 

“And when it ends? What then? Or if someone finds out he’s fucking a student? He’d lose his job and it would be my fault.” 

“No, it would be his fault, and he’s rich anyway so it wouldn’t even matter.” 

You thought back to your last conversation with Baekhyun, and what he said about his parents. Even if he did choose to risk it for you, the thought of him losing a job that meant so much to him still didn’t sit right with you. 

“It would matter to me. Either way I don’t want other students shit talking me either. If my classmates found out there was something between us it would be hell.” 

“All I'm hearing right now, is that you just need to not get caught. The semester is only 16 weeks, as long as nothing gets out while you’re in his class nothing too bad can happen. You just have to be careful.”  

You thought about it, and she wasn’t exactly wrong. As long as nothing got out while you were his student, nothing too bad could happen. 

“He won’t lose his job if people find out we’re together later on when I’m not his student anymore, right?” 

Mia shrugged. “He doesn’t hold any power over you anymore then so I don’t see why he’d get in any trouble. People might just think it’s weird since he’s older. How old is he anyway? He looks young.” 

“I’m not exactly sure... Somewhere around 30? Late 20s maybe? I should ask him.” 

“Yeah you should. I still have homework I need to do, I should get back to that.” She said before getting herself a glass of water and retreating back to her bedroom. 

~

The next morning you were exhausted. You hadn’t gotten much sleep because of everything that was going through your head. You wanted Baekhyun, and he wanted you, but there was still too much risk involved. But part of you kept thinking about what Mia had said as well. Could a fling really be that bad? 

You were nervous to see him too. You still hadn’t given him an answer to his question, and you knew you wouldn’t be able to dodge it forever. Lying seemed like a decent option, but you knew with how honest and vulnerable Baekhyun always was with you, you wouldn’t be able to bring yourself to lie to him. Especially when you did want something more with him, you were just scared. 

As philosophy class drew closer and closer you felt uneasy. You felt bad seeing Baekhyun again without giving him an answer, but you didn’t know how or what to say. You only hoped he wouldn’t press you for it. 

Class went by and you didn’t speak to him. He didn’t keep you after either, which was a relief. You had been hoping he’d at least go over some stuff that would help you on your essay, but you had no such luck, and you needed it done by midnight if you wanted any credit. 

When you got home you cursed yourself for procrastinating so much, but you had other homework too and you knew you’d be able to focus on that better, so you started it first. 

Eventually your mind got sucked into your physics assignment, and you forgot about Baekhyun and the essay, too focused on the task at hand. 

By the time you were done with your other assignments it was 8pm. Four hours until you had to submit your essay. One hour went by just reading and rereading the text you were supposed to write about. Another was wasted on an intro paragraph you kept deleting, because you still couldn’t understand the text. When 10pm hit, and you started to panic.  

You realized that you weren’t going to be able to do it. Your mind was now in freak out mode and you couldn’t concentrate anyway. Either the paper wasn’t getting turned in at all, or you needed to do something fast. In any other class you would’ve BS-ed  your way through it to turn at least something in, but you just couldn’t do that knowing Baekhyun was going to read it. You weren’t going to be able to submit it that night, but you needed to at least contact him and explain so he wouldn’t think you were stupid. 

By 10:30 you found yourself scrolling through your contacts, staring at his name. You’d thought about emailing him, but he probably wouldn’t see until morning and you didn’t have that much time. 

In hindsight you probably would’ve been fine to just send an email and try to get an extension, but the combination of anxiety over your grade and wanting to talk to him had his name in your phone looking better and better. 

So you called. 

Your nerves were on fire as you waited for him to hopefully pick up. Was this stupid? Would he even answer? Worst of all, what if he was disappointed in you for not being able to do the assignment?

After a few rings, he picked up. “Hello?” 

“Hi Baekhyun, it’s y/n.” 

“Y/n? Are you alright what’s going on?” You could hear the concern in his voice even over the phone, and you remembered why he gave you his number in the first place. 

“I- I can’t do the essay.” You felt your voice shake, before unloading all your grievances in one breath “I read the thing a million times and I still have no idea what it’s about and I put it off until tonight cause it was making me so anxious but I still can’t focus and now it’s too late and I don’t know what to do and I’m freaking out.” 

You heard him sigh. “Slow down, It’s okay, I know it’s a difficult assignment. Have you at least started?” 

“No..” You felt tears swelling in your eyes, threatening to spill and you’re sure he can hear it in your voice even over the phone. “Can I just skip this one? I tried to start it so many times but I don’t know how to analyze something I can’t even understand.” You choked out. 

“Y/n...” You could tell he was thinking of what to do. He probably shouldn’t give you special treatment, and you knew that but right now you hoped he would just give in. Unfortunately you had no such luck. “I’m sorry but I can’t let you just not do it. It would make it too obvious that I’m treating you differently than other students.”

“Then can you at least help me? Or give me more time? Please?” You begged.

“I’m still in my office. I can help you if you meet me here.” 

You felt your palms get sweaty and your heart beat faster at the idea of going to his office again after what had happened last time, especially this late at night and in such a fragile state. 

“O-okay. I’ll be there in 10. Bye.” You said, hanging up before he could respond.

Quickly you got on some shoes and drove yourself to the building his office was located in. Last time you’d been in there he’d asked you about your feelings for him, and now you had to go back. You told yourself to just focus on getting the essay done, but the thought still hung around in the back of your mind as you walked down the hall towards Baekhyun’s office. You felt jittery and embarrassed, but you needed to do this for your grade.

After taking a few deep breaths to ready yourself, you knocked on the door, and heard a muffled “Come in” from the other side, so you let yourself in. Baekhyun was sitting at his desk, which was covered in papers you assumed he’d been grading. Instead of the nicer clothes he would usually wear during lecture, he was just wearing a black t shirt and sweats now. 

“You know you scared the shit out of me when you called. I thought you were in danger or something.” He said to you as you sat down in front of him. “I really didn’t think you’d call me over school work.” 

“I’m sorry..” 

“It’s okay! I’m not mad or anything, just surprised. What part of the text are you having trouble with?” 

“All of it...” You felt your lip starting to quiver. “I’m sorry I know this sounds so stupid and you probably think I’m just trying to take advantage of how you like me but I promise it’s not like that.” You said, looking down and fidgeting with your hands, trying to hide the frustration on your face.

Baekhyun crossed his arms and leaned back in his chair, smiling. “I never said I thought that. I told you it’s not an easy assignment, it’s ok if you’re having trouble. Plato can be difficult especially for people who aren’t used to reading things that old.” 

“I should’ve at least started earlier...” 

“Probably, but it’s too late to dwell on that now. Let’s just try to go over the reading together, yeah?” You nodded. 

He moved his chair to your side of the desk before opening your textbook to the reading for the essay. 

“So the first thing that makes The Ring of Gyges so confusing is that you don’t really know who’s talking. Basically it’s a conversation between Plato and his brother Glaucon where they’re discussing justice, and it’s actually Glaucon speaking for most of it, not Plato.” 

You were listening to what he was saying of course, but you were still distracted by the proximity. Baekhyun was sitting right next to you now, arms almost touching. The only other time the two of you got that close was at the club. And you did not need to be thinking about that while he was explaining your assignment to you. 

“Are you following me so far?” 

Your eyes immediately shot up from the book to meet his, and you quickly nodded. Having him look you in the eyes again like that made your face feel hot.

“Glaucon argues that people only peruse justice for the benefits of it, and not because they actually want to be good people. He uses the example of a ring that grants it’s user invisibility, therefore allowing them to do unjust things like steal without being caught. He tells Plato a story about a man who finds such a ring and uses it do overthrow the king.”

You groaned. “It still doesn’t make sense though, what does some story about a stupid ring have to do with justice?” 

“Well, if you were given the ability to steal and deceive people for your own benefit, without ever having to worry about getting caught, wouldn’t you do it too?” You stayed silent. “Basically, what you need to understand is what Glaucon is arguing. He’s saying that doing good deeds isn’t a part of human nature, and everyone would behave unjustly if they knew they would never get caught. Therefore, justice is something people pursue not out of want, but out of fear of the consequences if they don’t.”  

All you could do was stare at him. It was infuriating how attractive he sounded while explaining it to you. 

“Do you have a bit of a better idea what to write about now? Remember it’s only two pages, so don’t stress too much.” 

You snapped yourself out of your thoughts. “Yeah, it makes a bit more sense now... do I still need to finish it tonight or?” 

“Friday. Just email it to me by midnight on Friday and I won’t count it late.” He said, smiling again. 

“Thank you for doing this, I’m sorry it was so late and everything.”

Baekhyun just chucked, “You know if it’s you I don’t mind. You could keep me here all night with questions and I wouldn’t stop you. But you understand now, right?” 

The way he was smiling at you now along with the closeness was making you slightly dizzy. 

“I think so, Glaucon is basically saying that injustice is better than justice then right? Because everyone would do unjust things if they’d always get away with it.” 

Baekhyun nodded. 

“So according to him the best way to live life would be to do things you know are wrong, but without being caught.” 

“Exactly. See, I knew you were smart, y/n.” A smirk had made its way onto his face as he spoke. 

You couldn’t help connecting what he was saying to what you were feeling inside towards him. You wanted him, and you knew it was wrong, but how could you deny it to yourself when it felt so right? 

“Baekhyun...” You asked, hesitantly. “D-do you think it’s okay to do things you know are wrong, as long as no one finds out?”

“I think it depends what you’re talking about.” He answered, now looking you in the eyes again with intensity. “I would never kill anyone, for any reason, even if I knew I could get away with it. But, if I really wanted something, I think I would take it.” 

You were hyperaware of how his eyes were now scanning your face, lingering on your lips. “Take what?”

A hand made contact with your thigh, slowly moving up until he stopped, right below the hem of your shorts. His thumb drew soft circles on the sensitive inner flesh, giving you goosebumps. 

“I know you feel it too, you want this, don’t you?” Baekhyun asked, now moving a stand of hair out of your face. He let his hand rest on the back of your neck, keeping you facing towards him. 

Your heart felt like it was about to short circuit from how fast it was beating. Your palms were sweaty and you could feel yourself shaking slightly. The way his thumb stroked your neck beneath your ear made you shiver, and you knew he saw. All you could do was stare back at him, dumbfounded. Any words you tried to get out stuck in your throat. He was right, you did want it. Now more than ever. 

“Tell me you don’t want this. Tell me you don’t want me to kiss you right now. I dare you.” He said, running his thumb over your bottom lip, eyes fixed on how it trembled beneath his touch. He was slowly moving your face closer his, but you didn’t stop him. 

Your silence told Baekhyun all he needed to know, and his lips quickly found yours. Immediately you let yourself melt into the kiss. You felt your whole body buzzing, finally getting what it had wanted for so long. His lips felt unbelievably soft against yours, moving in a slow rhythm as his other hand came up from your thigh to cup your face as well. You wrapped your arms around his neck and deepened the kiss, letting it become messier and more desperate. 

“I like you” you pulled away just enough to whisper “so fucking much.” You felt him grin into the kiss as your lips met again. 

He tasted like strawberries, and you felt high as your lips kept crashing together with more and more need. Your whole body felt like it was set on fire and simultaneously dunked in an ice bath, every nerve vibrating with want.    

When Baekhyun pulled your bottom lip gently between his teeth you let out a soft moan, and he started to lose it. He broke the kiss, standing up and pulling with him, before backing you up against the wall, a hand on either side of your head. 

“Sweetheart, don’t push me” He breathed, and started peppering kisses along the side of your neck, from under your ear down to your collarbone, sucking and biting on the way. 

Trapped between him and the wall, you felt weak and breathless. Your brain was in overdrive and you gasped at his ministrations, hands burying themselves in his soft hair.  His hands had traveled down to your waist, holding you against him tightly.

“Baekhyun” You breathed out, rubbing your thighs together as he sucked on a particularly sensitive spot. 

“Fuck, y/n. Don’t say that.” He forced the words out through gritted teeth.

His body pressed you into the wall, and your arms wrapped around him pulling him into you even tighter. He was completely consuming your senses and your knees felt wobbly from the intensity of it all. He was already smothering your entire front, but you tried to pull him even closer regardless.

You felt something hard press into your hip as his mouth covered yours again, and this time you shamelessly moaned his name into his open mouth. 

Much to your disappointment, Baekhyun immediately detatched himself from you, backing up until his back hit the opposite wall of the office. You could see how turned on he was by the outline of his dick through his pants and the pained look in his face. 

“Fucking christ...” He said, leaning his head back against the wall and closing his eyes. You just watched from the other side of the room. He kept his eyes closed and you observed as his jaw clenched and unclenched before you heard him continue. “You have to go. If you don’t I’m gonna fuck you on my desk and I won’t be gentle.” 

Your throat went dry at his crude words, but you couldn’t deny your own arousal. You walked back towards him, reaching out to touch his chest which was now rising and falling rapidly, but he grabbed you before you could make contact. His grip on your wrist was so tight it was almost painful. His knuckles were white, and you could see a drop of sweat trickle down the side of his face. 

His eyes bore into your own with a stare that warned you not to try anything more. 

“I’m sorry y/n but you have to leave. Not tonight. Not like this.” With his free hand he grabbed your belongings off his desk, shoving them into your arms. 

Still speechless, he opened the door and pulled you outside before going back in and closing the door behind him. You stood and stared at his office door for a minute, recollecting yourself and processing what the hell had just happened. 

Eventually your shaky legs began making their way down the hallway, back towards your car. You were pretty sure a janitor saw you as you turned the corner just down the hall from Baekhyun’s office. You kept your head down, trying to hide your face best you could while hurrying past. 

Once you were sitting in your car, you slumped into the seat, mind still in a daze after what happened in Baekhyun’s office. You waited for your breathing and heartrate to slow down before you drove away. 

Baekhyun left shorty after you as well, unable to concentrate on anything but the sound of you moaning his name. He felt terrible for throwing you out of his office but he’d meant what he said. He didn’t want his first time to have you to be in his office, purely fueled by pent up lust. He wanted to give you more than that. 

More than anything, he just couldn’t believe he’d gotten what he’d wanted for the entire summer. It didn’t seem possible, but now it had happened. And you actually kissed him back. It felt too good to be true. He felt himself once again struggling to sleep, but this time because he was too excited. This time, he didn’t have to keep himself up wondering, he knew he had you. He just couldn’t wait to see what would happed now.

You on the other hand couldn’t stop worrying about that exact thing as you stared at the ceiling above your bed. What would happen now? The thoughts weren’t fearful anymore, there was just too many of them to shut your mind down enough to sleep. 

You’d finally allowed yourself to give into him, and there was no more turning back. 

Next Chapter

[sixeyesgojo]

New Year's surprise

Summary: You spend New Year's Eve with your favorite people. Something catches you by surprise...?

Pairing/Characters: Team Gojo + You

Word count: 2,3k

Content warning: -

A/N: crossposted on AO3 // published on New Year’s Eve + written for Megumi’s birthday // I tried to make it funny back then but now that I am reading it again... crrrrriiiiiiiiiiinge. I also used honorifics here to show the banter and relationship between the characters.

ou have been looking forward to this stress-relieving day for a month now. It was a well-deserved break for all this work you've been doing lately.

Last week particularly wore you out from using your cursed technique, the ability to manifest and manipulate light, repeatedly as the curses kept getting nastier and more annoying. Being one of the handful of Jujutsu Sorcerers was a pain sometimes. Just like Nanami, you hated working overtime but it was bound to happen as the branch you were working in was not exactly what the youth of today wanted to do - let alone even know of - understaffed as ever.

Not that you minded being on missions but sometimes you feared that your co-teacher, the most praised and famed Gojo Satoru, wouldn't properly teach the kids in your absence. You weren't even a teacher to begin with but some time after graduation, your teacher Yaga Masamichi - now principal of Jujutsu High in Tokyo - had asked you the favor of supporting that idiot Satoru... just in case. It's not like you could decline anyway, nobody else was up for the job, so you accepted. As time passed, you truly grew to love this job, especially this year's first-years had you enamored with them.

So it happened that your dear friend and ex-classmate suggested a Christmas party, which also served as Megumi's surprise birthday party, at your house. Coincidentally, this friend happened to have white hair and regularly wore a blindfold to work. Coincidentally, he was deemed the strongest. Coincidentally, his name was Gojo Satoru. “Do I not get a say in this, Satoru?” you had asked, your back facing him. His blunt answer was a simple “nope.”, which earned him a whack to his right shoulder. “I've already told the first-years about the time, date and location,” the man grinned sheepishly. And he knew you wouldn't be able to decline if it was about your beloved three students. You had no choice.

“Well, Satoru, since it's come to this,” you leaned in close to whisper in his ear, “why don't we use this opportunity to throw a surprise birthday party for you-know-who?”

The white-haired sorcerer grinned, “Sounds like you've been planning this all along, if you ask me.”

You shrugged your shoulders nonchalantly. “Nobara; but give me one or two days - I'm still quite busy,” you said. He gave you a thumbs up before replying, “Then I'll handle Yuuji. Give me a second.”

He clapped once. Then, the man was gone from your sight. Like a poof.

Being able to communicate without words was one of your favorite things about Satoru's and your friendship.

And so, a little over a month passed ever since you and Satoru made that agreement. It was easy for Satoru to convince Yuuji but you had known from the beginning that it took a little more coaxing for Nobara. In the end, you also successfully managed to lure her in. Even though you had to postpone it, it ended up being a New Year’s Eve party instead.

Damn these higher-ups, giving you a 4-day mission a day before Christmas Eve. You have looked forward to this party too, it saddened you greatly to have it postponed. Fortunately, your students and Satoru decided to wish you a merry Christmas via video call. It was truly a delight on such dark days. Besides juggling your two jobs, you've also been preparing for the party diligently. After all, you didn't want it to be a flop.

It wasn't exactly easy to convince the higher-ups to let you and Satoru take a day off from missions and frankly, you didn't convince them at all; you both just ditched them, probably pushing them onto Nanami or whoever was on hand (sorry?). As for lessons, Satoru managed to persuade principal Yaga that you and him were planning an “important extracurricular class”. You weren't sure if Yaga had actually bought the excuse or just let it slide. It did not matter anyway, who would dare to stand in the mighty Gojo Satoru's way? Moreover, you rivaled this man in both stubbornness and authority. Nobody stood a chance when the two of you planned to see a plan through.

You've been cooking (and baking) since morning while Satoru was dancing around your house to decorate it. After all, he was no help in the kitchen and his long limbs made it easy to reach high places, so he was forced to placed in charge of decorating by you.

“Satoru, when are the kids coming again? What time?” you called out from the kitchen. A head popped up by the door, “8PM, so two hours from now,” it chirped. “Megumi will come half an hour later, as planned,” he added. “Good. That's plenty of time.”

It was not plenty of time. You should have known. Something was bound to go wrong. Especially with the way this idiot was skipping through your home with his lanky, long limbs. Of course, he'd knock over some things, including a big filled vase in the living room. There was screaming (from you) and roaring laughter from the culprit; chaos ensued as you chased the tall man around your house with a broom. “GOJO SATORU, WE DO NOT HAVE TIME FOR THIS,” you yelled. “What happened to ‘plenty of time’?” he laughed, simultaneously running for his life.

“You dumbass, I would have been done with cooking a while ago if you didn't knock my shit over so I had to help clean this mess!” you shrieked and stopped running. Satoru looked back - he knew the look on your face: you were done chasing him around. Gulp. You took a step back with your right leg. “I ain't a pokemon trainer but I'll make sure to at least catch you, Gojo-sensei,” you said, just loud enough for him to hear, as a string of concentrated light appeared in your hands. The man on the run knew you weren't able to hurt him thanks to his Infinity but he knew damn well, you could at least restrict him.

Like a lasso, you threw rope in his direction. A clap. More claps. He was teleporting away from you. Yeah, things like this frequently happened with the two of you. “Multiply,” you murmured and your rope did as you commanded. It took the form of a spiderweb... or a fishnet.

“Stop running, so it will be easier for me to catch you, Toru-chan~”, you called.

“Ain't no way,” he said as he ran and turned his head to stick out his tongue. You clicked your tongue. Inhaling deeply, you positioned your leg even farther back. This kind of felt like the Olympic Games or something.

Using the force, you threw out the glowing net. In reality, you knew it was just a second but the moment seemed to stretch in your eyes. “Would it be a good catch today?” You almost heard the fishermen say at the riverbank.

The moment your net connected. The sound of a plop on the ground. Yes, it was indeed a good-looking catch, you mused. Not that your net actually touched him, thanks to his ability, but at least it caged him like a cocoon for the time being, only leaving out the head.

“You look so smug,” Satoru commented, pulling a face. The cocoon vibrated against him, compressing made difficult due to Infinity. “Of course, I just caught a big shiny Magikarp,” you retorted. “Wait, are you calling me useless-”

Ding dong. The sound of the doorbell had your eyes almost popping out of their sockets. A sigh left your lips and you stuck the light to a wall as you trudged your way to the entrance door to let in Yuuji and Nobara. At least you could expect some real and less chaotic help now.

The first thing that greeted them after putting down their presents in the living room was the sight of their white-haired teacher dangling from the ceiling by a mysterious, seemingly sticky and shiny rope thing. “Sorry to ask, sensei, but… did we interrupt something here? Or would it be better not to ask?” Nobara asked, Yuuji was agape. “Yeah, we were-” Satoru started but you quickly shushed him.

You shook your head, “No, but Gojo-sensei couldn’t refrain from pranks, so here we are.”

“Oooookay,” Yuuji said, still flabbergasted.

“So guys, we aren’t quite done yet. Me and Gojo-sensei require a little help… especially in the kitchen,” you said as-a-matter-of-factly.

“Sure, I’ll help in the kitchen then,” Nobara volunteered. The pink-haired boy raised his hand, a sign that he also wanted to help: “I can set the table.”

“Perfect! Nobara and Yuuji, come with me. We have 30 minutes until Megumi will be here. As for you, Satoru, you better clean the mess you made,” you commanded as you shot the cocooned man, who was smiling innocently, a sharp glare. With that, you and your two baby ducklings left the living room.

You showed Yuuji the cupboard where he would find everything he needed, from cups to plates, bowls and whatnot. Nobara helped clean the dishes while you finished up what you were doing before. A few finishing touches were left. Christmas music started playing in your house as you heard someone pace in your living room. Satoru was probably hanging up the remaining Christmas lights in your spacious living room. After all, it was clear as a day that the man would be able to free himself after a few minutes.

You and Nobara made it just in time: 28 minutes. Your pink-haired student, Yuuji, did a surprisingly excellent job, setting the table as beautifully as you had imagined. The dishes were laid out on the table, just waiting to be eaten.

The eagerly awaited guest arrived no sooner than expected, unlike a certain someone, even bearing presents as it seemed. “Christmas is over, why did you decide to play Christmas music?” Megumi remarked, not sounding like he was over the moon.

“Woah, Megumi, you look as grumpy as always!” his male teacher noticed.

“Lighten up a little, will ya?” Nobara added, while the adorable Yuuji gawked at the bag of gifts Megumi had brought with him. “Oh, stop it, you two. Megumi is just not that good at outwardly expressing his emotions,” you defended… and the student didn’t know whether that was an insult or not.

“You brought presents? So cool!” Yuuji was delighted, still looking at the bag and not even paying attention to whatever was happening, until Nobara tugged on his arm to lead him to the dinner table.

Dinner was a little chaotic; everyone was excited, some things were spilled, a lot of words were exchanged, a little banter happened, gales of laughter echoed through your four walls. It was joy. Chaotic joy.

Finally, it was time for the presents. After everyone received their presents, a malicious grin appeared on Satoru’s face from what was to come. Yuuji’s face also had a tinge of mischief to its expression. Yours and Nobara’s face were straight up devilish, the eyes in particular. All of you were looking at him.

An uneasy feeling rose in the dark-haired boy’s stomach. “Run as fast as you can,” it told him and his foot twitched a little, which was not missed by Satoru at all.

“Oh no, you’re not going anywhere!” Nobara exclaimed, then ordered Yuuji to restrict Megumi (which he did) as you put one of Satoru’s blindfolds on your poor, baffled student. Satoru forcefully stuffed Megumi’s mouth with one - then two - mochis to prevent him from making any noisy ruckus. All he heard was feet shuffling through the room. After what felt like an eternity of nervosity to him, the blindfold was finally lifted and Yuuji loosened his grip on his friend.

Unitedly, the four of you, who had planned this surprise for him, wore party hats and chanted, “HAPPY BELATED BIRTHDAY TO YOU, FUSHIGURO/MEGUMI.”, holding more presents for him into his face. “Ooh, he is embarrassed!! Look at him, look at him~” Satoru teased and Megumi looked away, a blush spreading on his face. “Am not,” he attempted to retort before being ushered to open the gifts by Yuuji. One by one, they were unwrapped, revealing a nonfiction book from Yuuji, a comfortable hoodie from Nobara, a pair of brand new headphones from you and–…

“Gojo-sensei, I do not mean to impose but…”, you breathed out. “...is that a maid costume?”, Megumi finished what you wanted to ask. “Hell yes, I thought our Megumi would look so nice in it!” Satoru had that shit-eating grin on his face.

Silence.

“Sensei, can you hold him so I can give this perv a good beating?” Nobara asked as she turned to you. “Sure,” you replied with an innocent-looking smile. You heard someone cracking their knuckles. “I’ll help you,” Megumi said. So the sound came from Megumi. “Wait, wait, guys!” your same-aged friend fretted, head whipping in Yuuji’s direction, silently asking for some help. The latter rubbed his head, debating whether he wanted to be a part of this mess or not. He ultimately ended up trying to help his teacher but couldn’t tear away the glowing restraint you put upon your co-teacher.

However, before anyone could land a hit or be saved, a menacing roar could be heard. It was followed by multiple phones ringing and someone banging on your door. “Please, Y/N-san, it’s very urgent! A grade 1 curse is in the city… with a few of its friends!” It was Ijichi. For a moment, everything stood still and you looked at everyone. Satoru spoke up loud enough for Ijichi to hear, “We’ll head out.” He nullified your light technique.

You looked at the man and nodded, heading out with him.

“Wait, sensei, we are coming too,” Megumi said, his face determined as he, Nobara and Yuuji followed the two of you outside. “Fine by me, but don’t die on me,” you said.

[dreamieofu]

Yours

pairing: mark x [f] reader   word count: 4.7k genre: strangers to lovers!au, college!au, smut, sexual themes, so much fluff.  summary: Mark is a familiar face, and one night when he asks you to hang out. warning(s): a lot of flirting, slight alcohol consumption, a small bar fight, a lot of kissing, protected sex, slight cockwarming, slight fingering, slight dry humping, tell me.. if there’s more this is my first time writing smut lol.

That’s the thing about love.

It’s unexpected. And this story is short, intense but plays like a record in the back of your head.

He was once someone you’d walk by, a distant stranger. You notice him in the corner of your eye, sitting at the cafeteria. Along with one of your classmates. It seemed to be that way, seeing him at the corner of your eye, around the shop nearest to your dorm. Catching him walk by you, on his way to class.  

A familiar face.

You didn’t think much of it, until you started seeing him more often; curiosity swirling in your mind, each time you’d find yourself looking his way.

Maybe it was his smile, or maybe the way he’d have his hands in his pockets. His stand, as he talks with friends. He was a familiar face, with no name attached to his small loop-sided smile.

It was that one night, near the steps at the front of the dormitory, you see him socialising with your classmate. At first you wanted to greet your classmate with your best friend, Renjun, but the way the boy would smile with his eyes, shots an arrow through your heart.   “Hey,” You gleam, walking towards them. Slightly peering over at him, soaking up the image of him and his hair. The way he stood there, cosy in a grey hoodie and khaki pants. You’d be lying to yourself to say you didn’t walk over in hopes of getting to know him. Your own personal mystery boy. While you introduce yourself, you also don’t fail to notice how much more endearing he was up close. Doe eyes, and a small mole on his cheek, your eyes trailing to find identical ones on the left side of his neck. He speaks, while a small smile creeps up on your cheeks, finally hearing a name for your mystery boy.   “Well, I’m Mark,”.

And just like that, you found yourself in an already blossoming love for him.

You exchanged numbers the night you learnt his name. Slowly, your both grew closer. Mark would go opposite the dorms on most days, hanging out with his friends, drinking beers and dancing around with them. You could see him below from your window, in a not so creepy way. Just admiring the way he laughed with them, and how he’d dance completely immersed in his element.   You send him a message. [6:30pm] I can see you from my window…

You hiccup a small giggle watching Mark instantly look up. His eyes searching for you mindlessly. This time Mark was sat at one of the tables nearby, his phone in his hands, hidden under the table slightly away from his friend, Donghyuck. Even from afar, you see a smile curve his left lip.

Mark [6:31pm] oh yeah? I can’t see you though.

He looks back up from his phone, trying not to be obvious to Donghyuck, that he’s looking for someone. Looking for you.

You exchange a few texts, whilst you watch him from your window. It was fun, the way he would message you from below. The way he would look up to the windows, almost as if he was looking right at you, yet not knowing where you were at all. You move away from your window sighing.   “He’s so cute…” sounding almost exasperated, Renjun chuckles at your words throwing a pillow at you from where he’s sat. You roll your eyes, moving the pillow onto your bed as you sink back into your position. You look out the window again, ignoring Renjun’s laughter.   “It’s obvious that you’re both flirting with each other,” Renjun explains, walking over to your bed which was right next to the window. He looms over the edge of your bed standing in front of your window to look down. He’s quick to find Mark. “I mean, he is cute. Look at him sitting there,” He laughs again, his tone slightly teasing you.   “I know! I’ve been looking at him for too long.” You turn you head at Renjun then back, returning to the window to sneak another glance at Mark.

“Why won’t you make a move? You never know, he could think the same thing about you.” Renjun’s suggestion is tempting, but you’re not very vocal about feelings. Especially if it’s romantical ones for boys you barely know.

But that was as far as you got. Small flirtatious interactions, but never anything like a date. You didn’t have many opportunities to be with him alone, too caught up with other friends. But one day, going home after a day of class, you bump into him and he’s alone.   “Mark!” You call out, with a big smile. You see him turn his head, catching your eyes. His face warms up watching you approach him, looking soft and returning your smile. But just as you get a step close to him, Mark engulfs you in a hug.

The hug was nothing you were expecting, he smells something almost like watermelon candy and it whiffs over you, filling your senses.  Mark’s chest is broader than you imagined, and his arms hold you tight. One of his hands around your middle back, and the other was gently placed at the back of your head bringing you close. His embrace lasted a second too long, before he pulls back, the same loop-sided smile holding his high cheeks. You feel like your heart was being nailed down against your chest, by how hard it was beating. Mark whispers a small “Hey,”.

You feel a little lost in his eyes as you reply, “How was your day?” And Mark smiles even wider at your question.   “Better now that I’ve seen you,” The thing is, Mark knew he was being direct with his flirting. Hoping you’d pick up, and in some ways you did. Mark notices you, probably the same way you have all along. Mark is forward, but in some sense socially awkward. However, when he finds himself in contact with you, things just flow. He doesn’t mind making the obvious vocal, he’s made comments about how he finds you cute. And each time, you don’t believe him. Throwing his words over your shoulder with a scoff and a nervous laugh. He likes the reactions he gets out of you, likes the way you’re nervous under his presence. “I’m going to hang out with Donghyuck later tonight for a drink. Wanna join?”   You radiate heat, both from the close proximity and his proposal. The tension between you two feels a little too much, and you swear his eyes are glistening. He looks pretty today. “I guess I’m free.” You agree.   “Cool, I’ll see you at the bar opposite around 8pm?” You nod at his words.

The time between this moment and 8pm stretched until you find yourself in your room sulking to Renjun.   “I can’t believe he asked me out!” You end your sentence with a whisper scream. Renjun was laid on your bed, on top of your covers one hand holding his head up as he looks at you bored whilst you finish your monologue.   “Well, he was bound to. I don’t know why you’re acting so surprised.” He rolls his eyes at you playfully. “As if you weren’t flirting in all the texts you send each other.”   “That’s not true!” Trying to deny all the times Mark’s messages wouldn’t fail to put a small smile on your face. Renjun says silent with a smug look.  “Okay, fine… We flirt a little… So what? I can’t flirt?” You fight back your past thoughts, knowing Renjun’s quick to call you out anyway.   You push yourself up from your desk, walking towards a full body length mirror. You look at your appearance, a spurge of confidence glowing. You admit that you were excited, as much as you were stressing over it all. “I mean, it’s not like we’re alone, alone. Donghyuck’s going to be there,” You drop your shoulders and pout.   “I mean, he could be just testing waters,” Renjun explains. You do know, although Renjun is your best friend (nothing more), he is a boy and to some extent, knows things like this.   “I guess… Wish me lucks?” You turn around to him, smiling over your shoulder.   “You don’t need it. Be yourself.”

You walk through the bar by yourself, heart racing with slow steps. You pass through dim lights and strangers, finding yourself deeper into the venue. Old vintage posters hung against the narrow walls, the smell of cigarettes surrounding you as music plays in the background. You finally find him. Sat across Donghyuck, with two pints of beers placed in between them as they laugh with each other. Mark notices your figure approaching, looking up at you through his eyelashes. An innocent smirk gracing his lips as Donghyuck silently moves over. You take that as a signal to sit next to him, as you sit across Mark with a breathless, “Hi,”. Donghyuck quietly giggles at the interaction. His hand covering his muted laugh.   “Would you like something to drink?” Mark asks, already getting up from his seat. Your eyes trail and follow his stance as he casts a shadow over your frame. He stands there in a graphic tee which is slightly tight, highlighting his figure. Not that you were staring too much, but he has a nice build. You swoon to yourself at his offer, licking your lips, “Surprise me,” You reply in a tone a tad bit too sultry for your liking, which doesn’t go unnoticed by the two males looking at you. Mark chuckles deeply at your response, a few of his top teeth showing as he nods off with a finishing smile. He walks into the crowd, away from the table and you watch his back.   “Cute.” Donghyuck gains your attention as you whip your head towards him, flushed.   “No,” You squeak, flustered. Because clearly he was referencing what just happened between you and Mark. Donghyuck just lightly laughs at you, taking a swing at his drink. You two talk casually for a few moments, before Mark returns, placing a red fruity looking cocktail in front of you.

“Surprise,” Mark gestures to the drink with a cocky eyebrow, taking his seat opposite you again.   The night goes by really nicely, Donghyuck is funnier around Mark. It was a feel-good vibe, getting to know both of them. You liked Mark’s drink suggestion a lot, so much so, he bought you 2 more throughout the night. Much to your dismay.

You finally felt like you were getting to know Mark outside his flirty day-to-day messages. He really did live up to all your daydreams so far, and you can’t pinpoint what it was about him that kept you so intrigued. Mark ever so often gazes at you, as if to silently ask if you’re okay. It’s comforting, knowing he cares about that.

His foot slightly nudges yours under the table. It causes you to look up from your drink, Mark looks back up at you innocently. The side of his leg brushing ever so gently against the side of your calf. You gulp slightly, watching him slowly move his body forward, away from the back of the chair. His eyes never leaving yours as he does so. Donghyuck is off on his phone, and Mark’s gaze is so intense you have to look away. Incredibly shy under his hold.

Loud shouting interrupts the moment.

Two men at each others lungs while others try and separate them. Their voices are distance but become more clearer when they approach your table faster than you realise. They’re too drunk to balance themselves as they slightly knock over against your shared bench with Donghyuck. Donghyuck instinctively puts an arm behind, to block them from pushing further. It gets a little out of hand when they knock against the bench once more, pushing your body against the table for you to gain steady balance from the impact. Mark notices your distressed look, “Come,” He mouths to you, knowing the fighting men were too loud for you to hear him. You got the point, once they backed off a little. Standing quickly, Mark mirrors you. He lets you sit in the inside of the seat, against the wall and he sits beside you again. This time, his warm hand holds one of yours from under the table. Donghyuck is safe, looking behind his shoulders looking at the guys. The argument sounded really drunk influenced and pointless, and it makes Donghyuck disinterested. Mark holds your hand close to his belly, over his lap as he looks forward, watching as Donghyuck does. But you’re looking at Mark ever so gently, touched that he’s trying to silently soothe your panicked thoughts.   The guys fighting finally cooled off and were escorted outside. “It’s common around here,” Donghyuck is the first to speak, his head motioning backwards swiftly referencing the guys who just left. “I’m going to use the toilet,” He clicks his tongue, getting up and leaving. Mark never lets go of your hand the whole time.   “Are you okay?” He asks, concern swimming in his tone as he looks at you. You were flustered since it happened all so quick. You nod though admitting, “I’ve never really seen something like that happen,”. Mark gives you a small sympathetic smile. He gives your hand a small squeeze as reassurance and it makes you feel safe. You’re grateful that they helped you from getting hurt, you don’t go out to bars or pubs often, so this experience was new. You both stayed in comfortable silence, looking at each other fondly. Only for a few short moments though because Donghyuck returns to the table.   “Anyway,” He coughs, breaking yet another one of your moments. “It’s getting late, how about we start heading back?” Donghyuck suggests, grabbing hold of his jacket that he took off earlier that night. Mark lets go of your hand upon hearing that, and gets up along with Donghyuck who stood waiting.   “Come, let us bring you home.” Mark smiles down at you, and you feel sad he let go of your hand. You stand with him, as Donghyuck leads you all back outside. The air was cool, and the same two guys were still arguing in the distance, away from the place you just left. You trail behind Mark and Donghyuck, hugging yourself as you all walk through the glass doors of the dorm’s reception entrance. Mark presses the buttons in the lift. He stayed on one of the top floors, and you lived on the 5th. Both Donghyuck and Mark drops you to your dorm door. Making sure to see you go inside, Mark stayed leaning against the side of your door as you stand in the tiny hallway entrance that leads to your single room. A smile on his lips as he says “Goodnight,” Donghyuck mirroring his words before they leave and you close the door behind them.   You were alone again, smiling to yourself at tonight’s events. Missing the way Mark held your hand. You take off your coat and place your bag down before turning on a lamp. You were about to change before you hear a knock on your door. You tilt your head at the sound, questioning if you heard correctly. You stride towards your door anyway, curiously opening the door to find Mark standing there. “Mark…” You say softly as he smiles at the way you say his name. “How come?” You continue, a bit lost for words as you step back widening the door. Mark took this as an invitation to walk into your room. “I was on my floor, but I wanted to see you again,” Mark confesses. He stands in the middle of your slightly glowed room. The small lap emitting a soft yellow glow throughout the room. Mark’s quick to scan your room and you silently thank yourself for cleaning up earlier today.   “You wanted to see me again?” You repeat his words, shutting the door and locking it for extra measure. You walk towards him, your throat feeling a bit dry. You gulp down the dryness, all of a sudden feeling vulnerable because he just stands there with an unreadable expression on his face. “Yeah, I wanted to do this,” He speaks with confidence, closing the distance between you in seconds. He’s quick to effortlessly find purchase at the base of your neck, bringing your face close to his in a swift movement. Taking you by shock. But before he even dares to kiss you, there’s silence. A complete juxtaposition to how he was confident a beat ago. You watch him flutter his eyes close, his lips barely a breath away before he whispers to you ever so quietly, “Just tell me if you don’t want this and I’ll stop.”   Your breath hitches in your lungs, as he delicately kisses your bottom lip. It’s just placed there for a second, barely a kiss. Before he continues, he lets you talk. You don’t say anything though. Mark takes the initiative to pull you closer this time, his other hand around your waist as you relax under his touch. He kisses you again with intention.   This time, he feels assertive, and yearning. You melt into his kiss, finally settling into the curve of his jaw. Holding his face, his smooth skin warm under your palm. This gesture makes Mark smile into your kiss, finally feeling you accept and kiss him back. The kiss is sweet, and his lips plush as he moves them along, just perfectly, his tongue lining against your bottom lip parting them. You welcome him with a small whimper, and he steps backwards. You mindlessly dance with him towards your bed as you both kiss each other with open mouths and open hearts.   The back of Mark’s legs meet the side of your bed as he falls backwards, sitting down. You follow him forward, and gently bite his lips as he giggles. He uses the back of his hands to move further into the bed making room for you. You find yourself straddling his lap, reconnecting your lips together once again. “I think I like you,” Mark suddenly confesses, his heart thumping hard against his chest as he looks at you. The way you place your hands against his chest steadying your balance, you’re speechless. Both because of how he kisses you, and how you’ve ended up in this position. Mark is eager as he holds your hips in place, “Maybe a bit too much,” He chuckles. You smile, letting your weight sink onto his lap as your forehead falls on top of his with an elated smile.   There’s undeniable tension, you both feel it, and more so under you. Mark is noticeably hard, but you choose to stay silent about it. Liking the way you’re so close, and he feels just as vulnerable as you. You give him one small peck, before replying, “I like you too,”. This is all the confirmation Mark needs before he kisses you with more hunger. A feverish tension connecting you both, as his fingers slip under your shirt, gripping and pulling you down against his crotch. You laugh to yourself at how cute he was, trying to hint at you. Pulling away from the kiss, Mark finds a new journey along your neck and behind your ear. Easily finding all your sensitive spots as if he’s known your body forever. You moan embarrassingly, as he detaches his now swollen lips. Eyes now hooded as he reaches behind his head, his jacket already placed else where in the midst of making out. To then grab the collar behind his neck to take off his shirt. You lean backwards a bit, giving him room as your eye the way his bare skin was slowly being exposed under the soft light. The dimness contouring the light outline of his torso. His head pops up with a dorky smile, throwing the shirt over your shoulder. You giggle at his gesture, finding confidence to kiss along his jaw, meeting and kissing his tiny moles on his neck with open mouthed kisses. He likes the way you kiss him and you can tell, by the way his fingers traces along your back. Mark’s hands grips your ass bringing you both closer together. This move makes him fall backwards. You move along with him as he kicks off his shoes and socks, he’s laid back as you move above him more comfortably. You stay straddling him, looking down as you shyly tug the bottom of your shirt. “Close your eyes,”.   Mark seemed to find this endearing and he complies. Closing his eyes much to his dismay, he feels you get up from your position. He stays silent though, knowing you weren’t going anywhere. “Now open…” Mark barely hears you, as he supports himself on his elbows. He opens his eyes to find you standing near the bed, arms around your waist hugging yourself. It was obvious you were shy and nervous, but there you stood. And Mark swore he’s never seen anything as beautiful as you in that moment. Bitten lips, soft skin, glossy eyes and the light from the lamp glowing through the small strands of your messy hair. Mark stands in front of you, unzipping his trousers as he does so. Eyes connecting with yours as he takes them off in front of you. You gulp, feeling feverish under his gaze. The air so thick, as he steps out of his trousers and kicks them away. He reaches out his hand for you to hold, to guide you to the bed. It’s so quiet in your room, you can literally hear your heart ringing against the tips of your ears. “Just tell me if you don’t want this and I’ll stop,” He repeats his earlier words, but now he’s above you. His hands supporting himself against the sides of your head. His hair hanging above your face, tickling your forehead. You scrunch your nose when he smiles at you, “I want this, and I want you,” You whisper, lifting your head to meet him against his lips. Arms looping from his arms that caged you, to hold him around this shoulders connecting from behind his neck. He kisses back, pushing more force as he lets himself relax in your arms. He supports himself flat with his elbows, his legs shuffling between yours. He feels even harder than before, now barely clothed. And he makes sure you know of it, by grinding it against your clothed entrance. You stay kissing him for long moments, the sounds of his breath hitching when you scratch your nails along his bare back. He pulls away eyes still closed, “Condom?” Mark sounds breathless and needy.   You nod, no words forming as your hand reaches to the bedside table. You blindly search through the drawer for your tiny black bag of free condoms the university provided. Mark chuckles when you tap the bag against his rib. He opens his eyes, and smiles to himself.  This time, he straddles you. After taking off his boxers and rolling the condom on. He looks at your hooded eyes through his eyelashes, sucking in his bottom lip when he finally has the condom on. You don’t fail to notice how pretty his fingers looked wrapped around his cock, the size he was and how this was happening. He throws the bag on the floor, before finding your lips again. You yelp in his mouth when his fingers moves along your slit, pushing against the cotton material of your underwear. Your arousal so evident against the material. “You’re wet,” Mark speaks of the obvious with disbelief. He can’t believe he’s managed to get you this wet, with just kisses. It ignites something in him because you find him pressing aside your underwear, hearing his finger lining upwards to collect your wetness briefly. He lifts them and places it in between your kiss, moaning as you both taste yourself on his fingers. Tongues licking at each others briefly.  You whimper when he returns his fingers, this time playing around with your essence and your entrance, “So wet…” He whispers to himself. He barely grazes your clit, before he kisses your neck. Mark’s head resting at the crook of your neck, marking you, when he lines himself up to your entrance. Your wetness easily hugging around the head of his cock. He bites down on your shoulder, finally moving forward to start filling you up. You open your legs wider to accommodate him, gasping at the stretch, nails digging into his shoulders. He teeth lets go of your shoulder to moan breathlessly against your ear, nibbling while he bottoms out.   “F-fuck,” He mutters, “it's so warm inside you,” whispering along with your whimpers because he doesn’t move. Your walls welcome him with love. He’s sinking into your warmth and it makes him crazy.  He only moves once he hears you moan out his name exasperated. “Ma-Mark…” and he starts.

Swift and precise with his thrusts, buckling up into your walls, as your mouth hangs open. He grunts when you clench around his length. “You’re so good, you feel so good,” He praises you, adorning you with his lips, and gentle kisses. He hovers above your glistening glossy eyes, looking into your fucked out expression from his movements. He doesn’t let go of your gaze, hitting into you harder making you bite your lip and knit your eyebrows together. His eyes intense and dark. You hold your clench around him when he speeds up, the way you moan his name like a chant, encourages him to speed up. He feeds off how you thrash your head, moaning and breathing with each thrust he gives you. Rolling his hips as you stick out your tongue. He welcomes you into his mouth, sucking onto you hard, fucking into you double.

“You make me feel so good…. Just like that,” You confess breathless, and he rolls his eyes at how muffled you sound. His hand trailing from your ankle, ghosting above your skin and making you follow along. One of his hands holding himself, while the other fiddles with your harden nipple. You gasp, licking your lips as he lowers his head. Mark’s lips attach onto the bud, sucking and rolling his tongue around. Needy you latch your legs around his waist as he thrusts deeper than you could have previously imagined. You choke on your spit, as he knits his eyebrows accidentally bitting your nipple.

His skin glistening with a sheen of sweat, “Pretty girl,” He kisses your cheeks, and you feel close. You clench onto him harder and tighter the closer you get, and he notices. This makes him speed up, chasing ecstasy, eyes peering over your expressions. The sound of skin slapping, and uneven breathes fill the room as you cum around him. Mouth hung open, your blunt nails running at his back, red lines of love and he’s in awe. Mark’s lips crashing into yours in a whimper. Your legs slightly shake around his figure, falling limp, but Mark doesn’t let up his movements. Chasing your orgasm with his, and he does seconds later. He stills himself above you, holding his breath as you feel him pulse inside of you. His orgasm lasting longer than he’s used to. Warmness sticking your bodies together as his strength gives out. Mark lets his body fall next to you, head spinning, trying to catch his breath. “Fuck…” He whispers to himself.   “We just did,” You smile turning your head, watching as his chest heaves, his hair pressed against his forehead. You rest your palm on his chest, feeling overwhelmed with everything. His heartbeat under your palm. Mark still had so much to show you, you both know it. And you’re excited to find it out. He lets out an airy laugh because of your words, his head now turning in a similar way to see you. His body turns to you also, his hand resting against your face as you look at each other. The tension settling in and feeling like adoration. “Will you be mine?” Mark sounds nervous, which you find really funny considering the deed you both just did together. Nonetheless, you smile at his words, feeling self-assured and vulnerable as you reply, “I’m already yours.”

[alonfic]

in conclusion (i love you)

pairing: tsukishima kei x reader genre: college + fwb to lovers au | fluff, suggestive wc: 3,742 description: In which Tsukishima discovers that love can bloom in inconspicuous ways, even when you and him are supposed to be conducting a (not so) simple experiment. author’s note: cross-posted onto my ao3. still not sure if i’ll be posting here frequently, but i thought i’d see how i like it first.

Tsukishima doesn’t understand romantic relationships. 

He thinks they’re illogical, impossible, and most of all, irrelevant. They seem like too much hassle when it comes to the ordeal of courting. From the hours spent preparing complicated banners for asking significant others out to the extensive search for gifts that are supposed to appease pointless “monthiversaries,” Tsukishima finds it all to be a waste of time. 

Just acts for appearances. Sure, they’re cute, heartwarming even, but what does all of that show for anyway? What happened to qualitative experiences?  

He ascertains that he may never truly understand what it means to love another person by modern day standards; for those standards are all full of overhyped bullshit trying to make a trending post on Twitter and Instagram. If avoiding those things means saving himself from love, then so be it. (Irrationality and heartache be damned!)

Tsukishima decides in his first year of university that he won’t do any of those things. 

How? His friends ask, guffaws in tow.

He simply tells them that he won’t fall in love. 

/

Not many people share in this same ideal, Tsukishima finds. 

He can’t say he’s very surprised or disappointed to have his philosophy rejected, especially by those same friends who have questioned his goal, Yamaguchi and Hinata. They’re fools who deem love as something akin to fate’s gift. 

Love is a choice, Tsukishima tells them, and this is his decision. 

They think he’s being a little silly for not wanting to fall in love. They say he’ll get bit in the ass when he least expects it and he’ll go back on his word, but he hardly thinks that’s true. 

If he doesn’t want to fall in love, then he won’t, and that’s perfectly okay. At the very least, you agree with him. 

You have always understood him on wavelengths that others simply could not. You have always stood by his side when it came to debates on this matter, and even more so when he really thinks about it. 

Tsukishima has been able to lean on you even in high school. Him being so introverted has made things difficult, and what he needed then was patience, something many people lacked, but unlike those people, you took the time to understand him and his struggles. 

It’s made him grateful to you. Even now. Scratch that, especially now. 

These days he isn’t just shooting you texts about how he could’ve let someone down easier. Sometimes it’s checking out hot pot places at 8PM on a Tuesday; other times, it’s going to the library until 5 AM because statistics midterms suck at an unbearable level, but you take the 8AM class with him anyway, just because it’s him, and General Education requirements may suck but they’re mandatory. 

It’s also sharing jokes that no one else gets, and teaming up against the rest of the group when they heckle you two about being the only ones who sees love as the bane of both your existences. 

Tsukishima has heard plenty of love advice and received Cosmopolitan articles on how to woo a friend from those same punks who think that love is given by chance. He has seen the knowing stares exchanged at kickbacks. Hell, he’s heard all the whispers, too. But it means nothing. 

This is friendship. No matter what anyone else tries to insinuate, you both know it means nothing for either of you. 

What you are together is simply platonic. 

Friends, that’s all. 

/

Somewhere along the way benefits become a factor for you two. 

These are the sort of benefits that forgo late night convenience store runs for ramen and other delicious, overly processed foods that Yamagchi and Sugawara blanch at the two of you over. Instead it’s the kind that means heated kisses in one another’s bedroom and wandering hands in places very few people have become privy to in both your two-decades long reign on this planet. 

And, it all starts over a simple experiment. 

At least that’s what you and Tsukishima like to call it. 

/

“Isn’t it stupid that Ennoshita would say that?” Tsukishima asks, glancing at you from the corner of his eye. “We can be friends. How can he say it’s impossible for us to be just friends? I mean there’s nothing wrong with being attracted to one another, right? You’re good looking. I’m good looking. We’re acknowledging each other’s attractiveness.” 

He pats the open space beside him on his bed, feeling it dip a little soon afterwards. You’re visiting him after he blew off the post-kickback get together. He shouldn’t be surprised that you came by to check on him.

You smile at him as one of your fingers pokes his cheek. “You sound awfully bothered over something that shouldn’t matter.” 

He frowns at your nonchalant tone, even if you are messing with him. 

Tsukishima has never been that particularly fond of other people telling him that his friendship with you is only the stepping stone to something more, that it would only be a matter of time before you two were calling one another cutesy pet names and holding hands for other reasons than as a precaution from getting lost in crowds, and that if he didn’t step up to the plate now, then he would lose you to someone else. 

But how could he? If anything, you’ve been more against love than him. Seeing you with someone else is as impossible as seeing Hinata at Aone’s height. Possibly with some help, but still highly unlikely. 

“I mean, aren’t you? So what if we’re attracted to each other? That doesn’t mean we’re going to start dating because of that.” 

You hum in affirmation. 

You know he has a point. It’s silly to expect two friends to date when both your admissions came as a result from a simple game of “truth or dare.” While it comes from a place of truth, it isn’t like either of you admitted to harboring deep-seated feelings for one another or anything. It’s simply an admission of truth. 

He thinks you’re attractive, beautiful even, and it helps that you share the same opinion as him when it comes to love. And, you think he’s attractive, handsome even, and it’s because you both share the same opinion on love that he doesn’t have to worry about frivolous things like falling in love with you. Or you with him. Your dynamics just work like that. 

“You know, there are other alternatives to relationships anyway, right?” you ask him, watching as he turns to face you on the bed. 

“Like what? Hooking up?” He feels a little dumbfounded. The idea of hooking up with you never really occurred to him. Clearly not because he wasn’t attracted to you, but didn’t those end up… badly? 

You nod. 

Seeing the instant confusion wash over his face, you explain, “Yeah, hook-ups aren’t so bad. It’s like a one and done. It doesn’t even have to lead to anything more. It’s like a preliminary thing. Trial or whatever. We give it a go and if it doesn’t work out, then we can just go back to being friends.” 

“And if it does? Work out, I mean,” he gulps. He doesn’t want to think of an option that means losing you or this friendship. But he’s intrigued, he wouldn’t have asked if he wasn’t, and you know it. 

“Then we have one of two options.” 

He blinks. “Which are?” 

“Well, if it does, then we can continue and enjoy the fun. Or, we really fuck ourselves over and do exactly what our friends have been betting on for years.” You lean in closer, eyes alight with mischief and interest. 

He feels a tug within him to concede, as if his own body knows its answer, while his mind’s doubts seem to lower in volume the longer he’s under your gaze. 

“What do you say? Up for an experiment?”

He still has to ask: “And, what if we can’t go back from this?”  

“I don’t know,” you whisper, eyes softening as you note his hesitancy. “Even that’s something I can’t answer. This is just a risk we both have to be willing to take. Truthfully, I’m in. But, are you? I-it’s okay if you aren’t, though, Kei. This was just a suggestion, of course—”

He doesn’t take a second longer to tell you his decision.

“I’m in.” 

After all, it couldn’t hurt… right?

 /

Tsukishima discovers many things in this time. 

Things that he never really gave a second thought on. Somewhere between how you look bathed in moonlight with the curtains half-open to the just-right way you feel beside him, he realizes how soft your skin is, how low and husky your voice can get when you’re feeling a particular way, and how powerful you are. 

There’s something enticing about you. Not just in the way you look bare, but the way you can make him feel even without the lack of clothing. He realizes that he enjoys the lingering taste of your lips against his, the heat that your fingertips leave behind, and the small voice you use when you call his name. 

It’s normal, he tries to convince himself. This is how it should be. 

It would be ridiculous to hate the way you feel or sound when it comes to him. And while that is true, that becomes a whole different matter when it bleeds into everyday life outside of the bedroom.

He swears there are moments where he can hear you say his name and you aren’t even in the room. His eyes catch sight of something familiar, at least enough to remind him of you, and suddenly you’re popping up front and center in his mind. He can’t help but smile, of course. 

Even just the taste of last night’s kiss rears its head when he’s doing homework, suddenly taking him right back to that night you two shared talking about the latest fantastical escapade in his reading arsenal. 

He believes the simplicity of these exchanges is the best part of this entire experiment. 

Being able to switch between friendship and, well, sex. And he isn’t sure if the consistent exposure to your presence has brought him to think of you constantly or if it’s some other seed blooming in the vestiges of his chest. He can’t say. Partially because he’s scared to. Because admitting to the second possibility means changing something good, something normal. And change, in this regard, often means a relationship. One that he isn’t sure if such feelings will truck through or crash and burn the moment he mentions it. 

Instead when you call out his name, looking at him with furrowed eyebrows and a fingertip tapping his cheek, he flashes one of his heartwarming smiles your way and brushes aside the concern. 

“It’s nothing,” he tells you. “I’m fine. Everything is perfect.” 

And while you aren’t convinced, you simply nod and take note to ask another day. 

/

The thing that bothers Tsukishima most is being fickle. 

He doesn’t like being fickle. He knows it is transcribed in the stars that he is a fickle being. And it doesn’t help that everyone is constantly telling him that he is indecisive. He knows already. He knows it well. He hates it, but only when it comes to you. 

He is never indecisive with you. Well, only because you’re the assurance he needs when it comes to decision-making. Maybe it’s your influence. You’re bullheaded and more self-assured than Patrick Verona from “Ten Things I Hate About You.” (Mind you, you’re the one who forced him to watch it. And, fortunately, he wound up loving it.) 

He constantly thinks about how opposed those two main leads are about love, simply because it is exactly against what everyone else expects from high school teenagers. They don’t conform to the status quo. They make their own status quo. Perhaps that is where Tsukishima garnered such a strong stance against love from. Partially from the movie and mostly from you. 

While everyone is banking on your relationship to become more than just friends, he truly can’t help but consider the possibility of a ‘more’ with you anymore. He realizes this when he sees you underneath the incandescent fairy lights hanging around your room. 

Your tranquil visage, how effortless you look sporting one of his T-shirts with a giant crescent moon on the back, and the way your limbs so effortlessly remain entangled. This is comfortable. This is… right. 

He doesn’t stop himself from brushing aside the stray locks covering your face. Normally, he might like to turn over and occupy another part of the bed, but he prefers to remain where he is with you in his arms, just so he can listen for your soft and steady breathing like his own personal lullaby. If he was brave enough, he probably would’ve kissed your cheek. 

Truthfully, if he were in a relationship with you, he truly wouldn’t mind. Not even a little bit. 

Realization strikes him then. A simple, yet vital question crosses his mind, one that he hadn’t thought needed to be asked before—could you feel the same way about him? 

Tsukishima doesn’t have any other answer besides I don’t know. 

/

When Tsukishima said he could never be as irrational as any other lovestruck fool, he never imagined what it would be like to see you in the arms of another man. 

Given, this is a man he knows well. Trusts, even. He can’t help but feel a large pang in his chest when Kuroo spins you around on the dancefloor. It’s a drunken habit that everyone either loves or hates depending on their sobriety levels, but even while sober, you seem to bask in this treatment with glee. 

It makes Tsukishima grumble under his breath, “What’s so good about him anyway?” 

He doesn’t ask anyone in particular and expects no one to answer him back, but a nudge and a pointed look from Sugawara tells him that his ruminations have not gone unnoticed. 

Sugawara nods his head in your direction. “You finally realize you’re in love with her?” 

“W-what? I am not in love… with her,” he says. It’s all weak and unconvincing.

The smirk on the silver-haired man’s face says it all, much to Tsukishima’s annoyance. 

“Shut up.” 

“I didn’t say anything.” 

“You’re thinking about it.” He doesn’t want to say it aloud. He hardly feels right feeling what he does when you probably don’t even feel the same way anyway.

“What am I thinking that has you so peeved, Tsukishima?” Sugawara raises his eyebrow. “The truth?” 

The tone elicits a wince from Tsukishima, making him frown. Not that he’s unhappy, he’s just frustrated that the proverbial cat is now out of the bag. 

Tsukishima simply shakes his head, wanting nothing more than to escape from the scene. Maybe go home and burrow away into his bed, away from all of this. Afterparty milk tea trip with the rest of the group be damned. Did he really have to go when he was this emotionally compromised? Stewing right here just spells trouble, and not just for him, but for your friendship with him as well. 

“You should just be honest, dude. None of this ‘experiment’ bullshit. You both lost. Own up to the results.” 

Tsukishima raises an eyebrow at Sugawara. The rest of the party seems to cease with more drinks getting passed around, which he receives one quite graciously. “What are you talking about ‘both?’ It’s just me. I fell first.” 

Sugawara snorts. 

Tsukishima shoots him an accusatory glare, but when he receives nothing in response, he chugs down the red Solo cup without thinking of what’s inside. 

The mixture kind of tastes like shit, and it makes him feel even worse, because now his mind won’t stop fixating on you and Kuroo. A match that could be made in heaven. 

The dark-haired man has always been handsome, adorable at times, funny without trying particularly hard, caring, and worst of all, certain. God, was Kuroo a certain bastard. He always seemed to know what he wanted. He did as he pleased and got whatever he set his heart on too. 

It’s cruel, really. The way fate has metaphorically bit him in the ass like Yamaguchi and Hinata predicted. 

Tsukishima can’t stand the thought that maybe you would choose Kuroo’s sauve side tonight. He particularly dislikes that he really did lose his chance thinking that this experiment would last forever. A few months should’ve sufficed. Should’ve. But only an idiot would let something as good as you be a temporary fling. 

“Maybe I’m the idiot,” he mutters, shutting his eyes.

Sugawara doesn’t respond immediately, in fact, he doesn’t respond at all. Instead a voice he swears is yours does. 

“Who’s an idiot?” Fingertips digging into his sides are unlike Yamaguchi or even Sugawara. In fact, these ones are all too familiar, even with two layers of clothing blocking access to his bare flesh. “Kei?” 

When he looks at the perpetrator, he nearly tumbles over to see you in Sugawara’s place. 

You immediately steady him by interlocking one of his arms with yours, and it’s only you. No Kuroo trailing behind you. No Sugawara in sight either. It’s just you and him walking toward an empty section of the house. Milk tea trip really be damned, you seemed to tell him. 

“Are you alright?” He notices you make eye contact with Yamaguchi before you two round the corner into the surprisingly unoccupied hallway. 

Tsukishima’s begrudgingly grateful that Kageyama’s place is a lot spacier than he remembers. It’s enough that he’s been granted some relief—no trip or an audience to bear witness to his major crash and burn.

He sighs. “N—yeah. Er, no.” 

“Yes or no? Which it is.” You flash him a half-smile as he sways inside the empty guest bedroom. 

He looks around after noting just how quiet it is without the thumping bass of music or the chatter of others drowning out just about everything else. It feels bare here somehow. 

He shakes his head. 

“Why?” Your eyebrows screw together. “What’s wrong? Are you hurt?”

“I fucked up,” he whispers. Looking from the beige walls covered bare of any sentiments, he meets your softened gaze. “I fucked up the experiment.” 

“How did you do that?” 

“T-the results are inconclusive. I can’t continue, because,” he rubs the back of his head, “well, I caught feelings.”

The surprise is evident on your visage, even from the weak lighting created by the moon and street lamp outside. But he can’t deny seeing the sight of a smile beginning to grace your features either. Amusement, he can discern with absolute certainty. Relief, dare he say? All of the things he never imagined in any of his scenarios about this moment. 

“Leave it to you to be able to use big words when you’re buzzed.” 

“It’s true. We can’t continue this. I mean I’d love to have something with you, but this isn’t a one and done for me. Not anymore. Maybe not ever.”

“Really? You mean that?” Even though you won’t say it directly, he knows there’s a huge burden of thoughts on your mind from the way your bottom lip gets captured by your teeth. 

“Yeah, I mean it. I—I can’t pretend that I don’t love you anymore. I just can’t. I don’t think I ever expected to feel this way for anyone, but spending so much time with you in and out of bed has shown me that whatever shit I said before has gone completely out of the window. I mean I’m not asking you to be with me if that’s not what you want, but if at all, you feel something too, then…” He can’t help but fiddle with his fingers. Why is his heart beating so loudly? Can’t you hear it? 

“You love me?” 

He swears then that you probably can. 

Slowly, he nods. “I don’t know how I came to love you exactly, but it just struck me when you were sleeping. It felt right that you were beside me. Easy and comfortable, even. I debated so hard about what these feelings were when it came to you. I didn’t think I could like someone this much. But I just do. I just love you for you, for being there... for existing.” 

The last part has his cheeks burning, and Tsukishima can’t help but look away to save himself the humiliation of looking like a fresh tomato. You laugh when he does this, and he can’t even help himself from trying to catch a glimpse.  

He loves your soft exhale, it’s one that he relishes in. Somehow you don’t look as perturbed or aghast as he expects. If anything, you look quite content. It makes him wonder if Sugawara was right, if everyone else was right all along. 

He asks, “Well, what do you say?” 

This time you laugh again. A much louder, but he can’t help but break out into a broad grin, because the atmosphere feels lighter than any tension breaking to grip the room. He knows without being told.

“Only you, Kei. Of course, I love you too.” 

His heart swells, and a greedy part of him wants to hear you say it again. “Really?”

You nod and look at him as if there couldn’t possibly be any other answer out there. “There’s no one else in this world that could understand me the way you do. No one could touch me like you, make me laugh like you, and certainly not watch ‘Ten Things I Hate About You’ five million times with me like you.” 

“Five million and one times,” he corrects. 

His fingers shyly brush away the hair threatening to cover your face, and he refuses to be denied that luxury. Not when he can’t seem to get enough of you. He can’t even bear to move his hand away after he’s done it. “And I’d watch it over and over again with you, by the way.” 

“Good.” You smile at him, cupping your hand over his. “I’m glad we finally came to a conclusion on this.” 

“Even if it means getting ‘I-told-you-so’s’ and teased to all hell?” He smiles when you nod. “Good, ‘cuz I don’t think I’d have it any other way.” 

“Yeah, me either,” you say, leaning in to peck his lips. Of course, he returns the gesture (and then some). 

(The room is empty, after all.)