#and I come home and have a lil meltdown

[ploonets]

fucked up my sleep schedule in a desperate attempt to be by myself for a bit but what else is new

[du-hjarta-skulblaka]

Haha we used heating so we're fucked again

[mrsokkotsu]

ಣ ˖ ࣪࿐ྂ 𝓭𝓪𝓭𝓭𝔂'𝓼 𝓱𝓮𝓻𝓮 𓈒 ˖ ࣪

boothill x f!reader. sfw — hurt comfort. established relationship ﾉ reader is an age regressor ﾉ reader has a meltdown over being poked fun at by others :c ﾉ reader is shown to self harm through scratching 'n digging her nails into her skin . . ﾉ da word 'daddy' is used tew refer tew boothill ﾉ sugar, lil' love, darlin', princess, good girl 'n lil' missy as petnames ❤︎ ﾉ dis piece is extremely self — indulgent . . please b kind to mi . . ૮꒰⑅ ˊ ᵔ ˋ ⑅ ꒱ა ﾉ re-upload from a previous blog

a little hiccup, a little whimper, a sniffle, and then a sob, a wail, a scream.

you curl in on yourself, scrunching up into a ball and digging your nails into the flesh of your thighs, the fabric of your skirt bunching up in your fists. tears cascade down your cheeks in streams, leaving wet stains that seep into the cotton of your shirt, the collar of which is quickly coated with the saliva that dribbles down the corners of your mouth. the crescent moons your nails leave behind bloom pink on the expanse of your thighs, throbbing with dull pain. it only makes you cry harder.

you've hidden yourself away in the farthest corner from boothill, a little crevice that's barely lit and surrounded by thick hedges. the only way one could reach it is from the narrow passageway from the east, and you'd made sure to cover the entrance with an array of flowers that have been plucked and strewn across the entrance.

you had always liked hiding away in such little nooks, tucked away between the tallest plants and beneath the largest branches, in a world of your own, far from the judgement and scorn of others. it's the only place where you feel safe, at home. a small pocket of comfort in the chaos that is reality. a haven from the harsh world that exists beyond the walls of your sanctuary.

but, even that is taken away from you now, when the sound of footsteps crunching on dry leaves and the heavy panting of a machine draws near.

"sugar? are you there?" the familiar lilt of his voice is muffled through the foliage, and you choke on a sob when the branches rustle, the flowers fall and a figure parts the shrubbery. he's tall enough that the top of his head grazes the treeline. "i know ye'r there, sugar. let's go back inside, yeah?"

you shake your head furiously, press your hands to your ears to block him out. but boothill knows better than to let that stop him, crouching down and crawling on his knees. the grass stains the material of his trousers green, and you feel a pang of guilt strike through the cloud of despair that hangs over your head.

"i don't wanna!" you wail, voice cracking and hiccuping as you rock yourself back and forth, the heel of your palm pressing against the hollow of your throat. "please don't make me."

"don't make ye'rself sick, sugar. come 'ere." boothill holds his arms out and beckons you with a gentle wave, "ya know ye'r safe with me, don't cha?"

he keeps his distance from you, careful not to get too close. you're a fragile thing, he thinks, a flower whose petals bruise easily. and boothill has the utmost care for your delicate self, treats you with the gentleness and tenderness and softness that the world has never shown him, for the sake of preserving the fleeting purity and sweetness that lies within you.

he wouldn't dare do anything that may mar your beautiful soul. not for all the stars in the sky.

"h-hm," you sniffle, rubbing your runny nose with the back of your hand, eyes swollen and red, cheeks blotchy, lips pursed. "h-hhmpf!" you whine again, reaching out and making grabby hands at boothill, the tears that trickle down the slope of your cheekbones glistening like tiny droplets of honey. "m-my booh-h-hill.. mh— my dadd— d-daddy…"

you bawl, sobbing incoherently as you throw yourself forward and cling to him, the sudden impact causing you to bump your head against the steel of his chest, the scramble to hug him so frantic that your knees are scraped and grazed, the skin split from a collision with a stray pebble.

the wounds sting, but you hardly feel it, too caught up in your own distress.

"daddyyyyy—" you cry out, and boothill coos softly, stroking the crown of your head, careful not to let his metal joints tangle themselves within the locks of your hair. "da-ddy-y, make it stop! m-make the b-b-bad thoughts g-go away-y, plea-ase."

your words are choppy, punctuated with small yelps and gasps, and boothill holds you close, cradling your head to his chest, his touch so tender and full of love that it threatens to rip open your heart. the warmth of his chassis is a comforting presence, a grounding force that soothes the tempestuous waves that ebb and crash against your mind, slowly bringing you down from the height of your distress.

the tears have finally stopped flowing, and your cries have reduced to little hiccups. the sniffles remain, along with a snotty nose. boothill doesn't seem to mind. "what's makin' ya upset, lil’ love?"

"mm-h-hhm," you hum, nuzzling against him and rubbing your cheek against the cool material of his chest, fingers fidgeting with the fabric of his jacket.

boothill brushes the sticky hairs matted to your forehead away, tucking them behind your ear. "what's happenin' up here, hm?" he presses a chaste kiss to your temple, his lips a welcome balm on the inflamed skin. "talk ta' me, sugar. ya know daddy'll listen."

you chew on the inside of your cheek, worrying the skin raw as you muster the courage to speak. it's an arduous task, with how the doubts and worries and anxieties swarm the forefront of your mind, each one a little buzzard ready to pick and peck at you. "w-why am— why a-arent i n-norma-al?"

you swallow the lump in your throat, a shiver running down the length of your spine. you're terrified, and the feeling only grows the longer boothill remains silent. "every-one says-s tha-at i'm weird a-and-d annoying and-and, i'm c-childish and dumb, a-and— and-!" you inhale sharply, trying to calm the erratic beating of your heart. "d— hm— d-dadd-y a-am i b-broken?"

you whisper the last part, a mere ghost of a breath, but boothill hears it nonetheless, and the gears that serve as his heart stutter and grind to a halt, a sharp pang of something he'd never felt before piercing right through his core. "what? princess, where on earth'd ye'r mind go comin' up with somethin' like that?"

he asks you, his voice laced with the most minute of trepidation. "jus' cause some folks can't see how amazing ya are don't mean ya ain't normal, sugar. it just means they're too stupid t' recognise a real star when they see one."

he says it so matter-of-factly, as if he's stating the most obvious thing in the world. "b-but i'm not normal!"

you hiccup once more, "i don't think like everyone else! i'm little and i-i need to be looked after and-d—" your words are cut off by the clog of your throat, the droplets you thought had already dried spilling down your cheeks anew. "i don't act like an adult!" you sniffle. "i-i don't wanna be an a-adult. i want to b-be little! b-but but everyone a-always makes f-fun of me-e for it-t!"

"and i hate it-t! i j-just want-t to be me-e! but i can't-t, no-ot if it means-s people will a-always b-be mean to me!"

you've begun to dig your nails at yourself again, and boothill catches you, gently prying your hands away from your wrists and holding onto them.

"hey now, darlin'— no no. none a' that, yeah?" he takes one of your hands in his, brings it to his lips and kisses each finger, the tips stained the faintest shade of scarlet.

"no hurtin' yourself, ya hear me?" he whispers, pressing his lips to the palm of your hand and giving it another kiss. "daddy loves this little body, every part a' it. even the parts ye'r not so fond of. and it ain't healthy t' hurt what daddy loves, alright?"

he lifts his other hand and places it atop your head, caresses the back of it and runs his thumb back and forth.

"sugar, look at me, mhm?" he waits a moment, and then two, three. a fourth, a fifth. he's patient, always has been when it comes to you. eventually, you give him a tiny nod, the slightest of movement, and peer up at him through dewy lashes, doe eyes shining with a vulnerability and fragility boothill can only hope to protect.

"there we are," he breathes out, "jus' perfect. thank ya f' trustin' me, little one." boothill's voice is quiet, a low murmur, and it wraps around you like a warm embrace. "listen closely t' what daddy's gotta say, a'right?"

"there ain't nothin' wrong with ya, sweetpea. and don't cha dare think that there is." he wags a finger in front of your face, and you watch it curiously. "ya like bein' little and daddy likes lookin' after ya, and there ain't nothin' bad 'bout that. ya ain't broken. no sir, no ma'am." he shakes his head, "ye'r a precious lil' girl, and that's the truth."

"now, if anyone has a problem with the way ya are, send em' my way. daddy'll have a lil' chat with 'em." he flashes you a toothy grin, "we'll set 'em straight, sugar." boothill gives you a playful wink, and the corners of your lips twitch up into a timid smile. "jus' promise me ye'r gonna stick it out, hm? no more runnin' away. daddy can't go chasin' ya all the time."

he taps your nose, the light pressure tickling you. "we got a deal?" he extends his pinkie to you, and you hook yours with his, giggling softly when boothill gives the digits a firm shake. "tha's a good girl. daddy's real proud of ya." he plants a kiss atop your forehead, and you preen under the praise, the weight in your heart lifted by a huge fraction.

"now, what d'ya say we head back in and get those knees cleaned up, yeah? the sun's already settin' 'nd we can't have ya fallin' asleep before dinner." he gives you a stern look, the corners of his mouth twitching upwards, betraying the mock-sternness of his expression. "can we?" he chuckles. "ya know how cranky ya get when ya don't get yer fill a' dessert."

your cyborg lover hoists himself up and removes his hat, placing it atop your head. the brim falls over your eyes, and boothill can't help the adoring laugh that escapes him, lifting the edge up with his finger and giving you a smile so sweet, so pure, so full of love that it's almost sickeningly saccharine.

"up, up we get." boothill pats the seat of his pants, bending down and patting his knee. "hop on, sugar." he gives his knee a quick slap. "ye'r not walkin' back, not when those little legs a' yers are so shaky." he gives you a look that brooks no argument, and you comply, crawling over to him and throwing your arms around his neck. boothill stands upright, taking a moment to gather his bearings before he lifts you up and places you on his side, carrying you out from your hideaway. the path back is dimly lit, and you bury your face in the crook of his neck, the faint scent of his cologne wafting past your nose.

"there we go, all snug an' safe.. how 'bout i take ye'r mind off a' things with a lil' singin' on our way back, hm?" he coos. "i heard a new one on the radio the other day." boothill bounces you on his hip, your happy noises stifled against his skin. "how does that sound, lil' missy?"

[etoiile]

cute lil friends to lovers confession scene with akaashi <33

akaashi keiji was very used to you coming to him for advice and comfort.

you're having friendship trouble? you two are meeting for coffee. academic stress? you two are going for a walk. just a bad day? you two are watching whatever cheesy romance movies you'd like alongside your favorite snacks. (he always has them stocked in his apartment.)

you always referred to keiji as your "unpaid therapist," because he really was there to guide you and comfort you throughout all of the twists and turns of your life. whenever you accomplished a major milestone, keiji was there. whenever you needed to just talk about and process your feelings, keiji was there. even at your lowest, darkest points, keiji was there. he was always there.

he just had this natural talent for knowing exactly what to say and do. he had this process of welcoming your crying body into his home kindly, (or showing up at your place when he knew you were probably on the verge of a meltdown) making you something warm to drink, sitting you down on something comfortable, letting you cry out all of your worries and anxiety, and then giving you the kindest words of comfort and the most perfect advice for every situation. it was seriously magical, the way he always seemed to just abracadabra and suddenly, your life seemed a bit brighter.

he always knew exactly what to say and how to help you. it just came to him organically.

this time, however...

"i want to confess to this guy i like but i dont know how."

keiji stared at you in mild shock. he was certainly not expecting this. he thought that maybe you were feeling a bit overwhelmed and wanted to cry your eyes out to the notebook for the twentieth time to make yourself feel better, that maybe that one friend who always mistreats you made another snarky comment, that maybe you had a paper due in two days and you hadn't even started, but a boy? that you like? that you actually want to make a move on? this was not in his predictions.

admittedly, keiji had grown to like you a bit more than he had expected. there was just something about you that was so special and beautiful to him. maybe it was the way your eyes shone like diamonds whenever something mildly positive happened, maybe it was the way you somehow managed to cry at the same scene in the same movie despite having watched it multiple times, maybe it was the way that despite everything you would go through, you'd always try to keep your head up, but regardless of the reason, he had grown more than fond of you. if you weren't so dense, you'd see the way he looked at you, as if you were one of the seven wonders of the world, or the way he talked to you, in the most gentle, heartfelt tone that was never used on anyone else, or even the way he helped you with anything and everything, setting aside whatever he was doing to be with you when you needed him.

so, you can imagine the way his heart sank when he learnt of your affection for some other man.

"are you guys ... close?" he asked, silently hoping you'd say no, in which case he might be able to encourage you to wait it out a bit until you were sure.

"mhm!"

oh.

"we hangout a lot. he's always there for me when i need him!"

more than him? he thought that the two of you hungout pretty frequently, and he thought that he was your "therapist" who was there whenever you needed him. who the hell was this other rando? he knew most of your friends. you had tons of mutuals and he knew about the ones he didn't personally know through your constant chatter. how come this other guy had never before come up? who was he? he felt like he was going insane.

"and ... you're sure you really like him? how come?"

at his question, your eyes shone in the way that he loved, and he could see the glee radiating from you. it made him kind of sad to see that it was because of another guy.

"well, for one, he's super hot. like, he could be a model. he has the prettiest face ive ever seen and he has the most beautiful piano hands. not to mention, he's toned as fuck."

hotter than him? he knew he was no brad pitt, but he knew he wasn't entirely unattractive. was he not good-looking enough for you?

"for two, he's super smart. like, he's in an amazing major at an amazing university and he gets top grades every time. he's diligent and works hard! it's so admirable, and he inspires me to do the same."

he felt a pang in his heart knowing that despite the fact that he, too, works hard at school, it was a reason for you to go for the other guy.

"y/n, these reasons are a little surface-level. lots of people are good-looking good students. these might not be the right reasons for you to confess your feelings. it might just be a simple, fleeting crush."

despite wanting to be supportive of you no matter what, he couldn't handle the fact that you might be the girlfriend of some other guy. he felt a little bad, but he tried to nudge you into not confessing as subtly as possible.

"but that's not all. above all, he is so kind and he has such a good heart. i've genuinely never met another person as sweet as him. he's been there through my highs and lows, and he's just so pure and good. i care about him so much, and i can tell that he cares about me too. when im with him, i feel like i can be the best version of myself. he pushes me everyday and i'm so grateful to have someone like that in my life. i seriously wonder if he's like, a gift that the gods gave me when they saw how badly i was failing at life or something. i dont know what i would ever do without him."

oh.

you were serious.

you really liked this guy.

what did this other guy have that he didn't, though? he liked to believe he was decent looking! (hes gorgeous and majestic and i love him) he was a hardworking student! he always tried to be kind and caring towards others! why did it have to be this other guy? why couldn't it be him?

as much as he wanted to, he knew he couldn't try to stop you from confessing if you really felt the way you did about that guy. it just wouldn't be right. he couldn't let his own feelings get in the way of your happiness. before he gave you the advice and validation you were seeking, he decided to ask one last question as a confirmation.

"do you think he likes you back?" he questioned.

you pondered the question for a moment. "maybe. i think so? i hope so. i've kind of been trying to gauge his reaction lately, and i think he might like me back? he always tries to hide how he feels, and he has a pretty stoic face, but i can kinda tell what he's thinking because of all the time we've spent together." you replied.

he felt a twinge in his heart but put on a gentle smile regardless.

"he sounds great. if you're really sure of your feelings, go ahead and confess. i think it would be best if you got him alone, maybe in a familiar safe space, and told him straight up. i know that that's what i would like, at least." he advised. throughout it all, he sustained that same gentle smile and voice, despite his extreme inner turmoil. he spoke to you as if you were the most precious thing on earth, because to him, you really were.

"ooo sounds good! so, how do you think i should start it? like, just a 'hey, i like you?' or like, 'you're so special to me and yadayadaya?' what do you think, keiji?" you prompted.

knowing that he was planning how his crush was going to confess to hers felt a little pathetic. regardless, he mulled it over for a bit before replying with, "perhaps you could tell him that you have big news to share as you're sitting down. then, honestly, you could get straight to the point. just tell him about how you feel. however, it all sort of depends on the guy, and how you think he'd respond to different starters, of course."

you grinned. "okay! keiji, stand up for a sec?"

confused, keiji gave you a look, but stood up regardless.

you giggled at the way he looked at you. "so, keiji, lets sit down. i sort of have big news to tell you."

his heart raced. was what he thought might be happening actually happening? there was no way. he didn't know what to think. his mind raced with a million possibilities, ranging from you pulling a little prank on him to you telling him you were deathly ill, but the main one loomed large.

he gulped. "hm...?"

dont get your hopes up. dont get your hopes up. dont get your hopes up. he thought to himself. he was terrified at the thought of having false hope embarrassing himself.

"listen. we've known each other for awhile now, you know? and in that time, i've gotten to know you as this awesome guy who's perfect in every way. i love you to the moon and back; always have and always will, but now, that love is not the same kind as it used to be when we first became friends." you expresssed cautiously.

akaashi was sure he was about to have cardiac arrest from how fast his heart was beating. his palms were sweating and his eyes were wide. was this happening? was this actually, honest-to-god happening?

"i really, really, really like you, keiji. and im not saying that as just a friend." you stated. you looked a bit nervous, but you felt just enough determination to look at him in the eyes.

akaashi, on the other hand...

akaashi steadied himself on the arm of the couch he was on. "seriously?" he breathed shakily, feeling like the news was too good to be true. his face was beet red, his whole body felt numb, and he had subconsciously pinched himself to make sure he wasn't dreaming. he had never felt such an intense rush of emotion, and he had no idea what to do with himself. for the first time in your relationship, akaashi was the one less composed and at a loss for words.

"yeah. it's fine if you don't feel the same way, but i thought that i just had to-"

your words died in your throat when akaashi suddenly lunged forward and pulled you tight against his chest, burying his face in your neck.

"i do too." he declared, smiling ear to ear. he pulled away to look at you, admiring your beauty.

"i really, really, really do."

© 𝐄𝐓𝐎𝐈𝐈𝐋𝐄 𝟐𝟎𝟐𝟒 please do not copy or repost my work on any other site. interactions appreciated! 🤍

[gilverrwrites]

Is it weird that I like the fanon that Tim's dick is smaller? Let me reassure him about how perfect he is and pamper him! ❤️

I’m not sure if this is in reference to my HC about Tim being insecure about having an average size penis, or if I was just unaware of the general fanon consensus being that Tim has a a lil pecker? but:

1: Valid. Tim totally deserves to have someone whose just like, weak for him, you know? Like, coming home at 5AM, sore, sad, sick of being the butt of the joke, and as soon as he crawls in through the window, to have someone whose so happy to see him!  

Someone who want nothing more than to help him relax, to ease his wary bones and make him feel good about himself. Someone who’ll praise him non-stop while they ride him over and over. Someone who drops to their knees and practically begs to choke on him while he’s doing paperwork, or following a case.

Get this man a golden-retriever partner asap.

2. I've had mutiple asks about Tim having a small penis, and I keep imagining some in-universe viral tweet where someone was like ‘I bet Tim Drake-Wayne has a small dick and I wanna suck it so bad it makes me luck dumb’ or some shit, when someone else was like ‘FRFR but I wanna ride him and re-assure him it’s just right til he’s red in the face’ and it became a trend or something.

Or maybe it wasn't even that nice, someone just co-tweeted something unrelated on his accound like 'small dick energy.' and that was it.

People tweeting directly at Tim like ‘if it ain’t small, SHOW US.’ ‘Small till proven otherwise’

His siblings think it’s hilarious, but Tim is having a goddamn meltdown. Bruce having to be like ‘I know you said you won’t, but I can tell you’re thinking about it, DO NOT POST ANY DICK PICS. Am I making myself clear? Do you want the board of investors to hang you by your tie?!?!’

And I can’t decide if it’s Red Hood or Robin, or maybe even Steph on her civi account who tweets something like; ‘Have seen it, can confirm. #factchecked’

Queue Red Robin tweeting out ‘No, I have seen it, IT’S BIG’

Chaos ensues, because now the masses need to know why Red Robin has seen Tim Drakes dick? WTF? Are they banging? Did Tim buy him off? Is Red Robin a corprate sell-out?

This is Tim's villain origin.

[superblysubpar]

🥺 so um for your dad blurbs, what about like a lil ‘meet cute’ sitch with singledad!eddie x singlemom!reader. maybe their lil toddlers become friends on the playground or somethin’?? idk idk feel free to ignore me!! 💗

cece um what? why why why would I ignore you or this?! Sorry this one too got away from me, I can't seem to write teeny tiny blurbs guys. Thank you so much for requesting and I hope you like it! 💛dad blurbs

summary: see above Eddie deals with his daughter throwing a tantrum but - this is fluff warnings: single mom reader, descriptions of wiggling worms and reader touching them so if you ain't into bugs sorry | even if a fic is not marked 18+, my blog is - please respect this

1.5k words

Why Do Worms Exist?

singledad!eddie munson x singlemom!reader

Hands tugging at his curls in impatience as he juggles the backpack, the keys, the twelve leaves left in his custody and the angry toddler in his arms. 

“Down!” she tugs harsher and he huffs. 

Haircuts and baths seemed to be the only time his kid felt like reminding him that she was in fact his kid. Squirming and wrestling and shrieking loud enough the glass on the apartment windows could pop. He was grateful for his daughter, don’t get him wrong. Reminding himself whenever the demon possessed her during those moments that she’d be his quiet and wonderful kid again soon. 

But no one could have predicted that walking and exploring and learning would hit around the same time as Autumn in Hawkins - well okay, maybe someone else could have other than him. But no one, including Eddie could have foreseen that his unique and already quirky baby girl would be fascinated by any and everything that season had to offer her. And, really, how could he have predicted the meltdowns about these things when he told her she couldn’t take them all home with her?

Fucking leaves. 

And worms. Why’d his kid have to like worms? 

Maybe that was his own fault for calling her Bug. Were worms bugs? Were they their own…species? Jesus Christ he barely got his diploma and now here he is with a kid having a level thirteen meltdown about leaves. What happened when she got older and had questions about these things she found fascinating and he had nothing to offer her? Maybe Dustin would have a book on it. Or Robin. She’s into weird stuff and random facts. 

Eddie sucks in his breath as Sam yanks one curl particularly hard and realizes that if it’s bad now, the very near future of Spring would be even worse. And oh god, the rain and the mud and even more worms and his heart starts racing faster as he thinks about how much bigger she’d be come then. She’d put up even more of a fight. 

He finally gets the pack over his shoulder, the keys tucked safely in a pocket. Sammy’s butt supported under his arm and his hand with the leaves wrapped around her back. Twelve leaves - they’d barely made it down the sidewalk. 

She pushes against his chest, cheeks red and flushed to match her bright red rain boots dangling and kicking dangerously close to unwanted territory and he winces, “Hey, hey, watch it Bug. Getting too close for comfort there.”

Eddie knows she didn’t catch any of that and her tiny hands wind fists into his hair and her chin wobbles as he prepares for the wail to come and he squeezes his eyes shut. Only to be met with fiercer squirming and a head butt to his jaw that makes his ears ring, “Ouch! Sammy, come on, you can get down soon!”

He didn’t yell, but he definitely raised his voice more than he meant to. Sam cries and cries like he’d seen other kids do when heading in the opposite direction of the park. As they round the corner he can see the bright reds, yellows, and blues of the slides and jungle gym.

“Look, Bug, swings,” trying and failing to calm her down with a favorite word and activity. He sighs as other parents look his way as he gets closer. Sure, his kids shrieking was disturbing the peace but theirs screaming on the playground was fine. Gossiping and judging girls from high school who grew up into moms but didn’t outgrow anything else.

He sits on the bench as Sammy pulls and yanks more, closing his eyes again. Eddie presses his forehead to hers, wincing every time she hits against it. He speaks quietly, “Bug, come on, listen to daddy. Calm down.” 

He sets the leaves on the bench and the crying stops almost instantly. He opens his eyes, Sam’s temple to his nose, crocodile tears trailing down her cheeks and tiny chubby hands reaching towards the pile. 

“Leeb,” she hiccups and grabs at the pile. 

Eddie holds her in a firm lock, hand rubbing soothing circles up and down her back, “Leaf?”

She grunts, trying to squirm away again and she whines, “Pwease!”

Heart aching because she’s trying to say please, and she knows that’s the nice way to ask as she calms down. But god, he can’t have her bringing home every leaf from the park.

“Bug,” he taps the pile, “Leaves stay here. Not coming home with us. Leaves stay outside.” 

She huffs and he watches in wonder and awe as she nods and whispers, “Owside leebs.”

He grins. He did it. He dealt with a tantrum while judgey moms watched and his daughter is smart. She understood so much and she was probably gonna be a scientist or some crazy awesome shit he couldn’t even come up with. 

Eddie kisses her nose and wipes her cheeks with his thumbs, body relaxing, “Right. Outside leaves. Ready to go play?”

She shimmies out of his grasp, legs dangling until her boots hit the ground and she wanders toward the playground only to pick up a stick. Poking at the dirt and he covers his smile when she sits. Her plaid jumper and tights dragging and collecting all the dirt and leaves they can manage. 

A little boy sits next to her and she smiles at him, a dimple popping out and extending a stick to him like Eddie had taught her to share. He swallows harshly when she grabs his hand and they waddle to a particularly muddy puddle. 

Oh fuck. She’s gonna get even older and the meltdowns aren’t gonna be about fucking worms they’re gonna be about boys or drinking or-

“You look like you’re dealing with some extreme and sudden realizations right now.”

Eddie glances up to see you standing near his bench, smiling kindly and a cup of coffee in your hands. He’s taken aback one because an adult is talking to him instead of standing off to the side and judging and two because holy shit were you pretty. 

He gulps audibly, “I-uh,” he glances back at his daughter who’s fully laying in the dirt on her stomach now and he smiles, “Yeah, uh I guess you could say that.”

Gesturing to his kid and the little boy, “I see yours is corrupting mine. Believe it or not we’d managed to stay away from dirt until today.”

Eddie grins widely, “Well wait till he finds all the things crawling around in the dirt and wants to take them home.”

Your gloved hand presses to your cheek, dragging it down as you groan loudly, “Why do worms exist?”

He watches you watch the kids, your face melting into warmth and that sappy wow that’s mine look he knows he gets with Sammy all the time. He’s a goner if you’re single. 

Gesturing to the bench and scooting over he sighs, “Pretty sure only to torture parents.”

“Great. Can’t wait,” you deadpan and sit, removing your gloves and extending a hand to him and introducing yourself.

Just because there isn’t a ring doesn’t mean anything. He shakes it back, “Eddie.” 

Nodding your head to the little boy who’s flinging dirt around wildly with his stick, “That’s Parker. My right hand guy.”

Eddie straightens and sees the webs across the backpack you’re stuffing the gloves in and smirks, “As in Peter?”

Clearing your throat and taking a sip of your coffee before continuing, “Yeah, I’m shameless. I named my kid after my favorite superhero, okay? I was alone and drugged up on all the painkillers they could legally give me.”

Alone. 

He waves his hand, “It’s okay, mine's after a Lord of the Rings character.”

You smile at him, shy and sweet. He should just ask right? Or offer up his own information. Is it like just sharing your phone number with a girl? Hey, I’m Eddie, I’m a single parent are you? Not sure what’s about to come out of his mouth, but he’s stopped as his daughter decides she wants to be the worst wingwoman on planet earth right at that moment. 

“Hole pwease,” her tiny voice brings his attention down, extending her dirt smothered hands out to you.

Your mom instincts kick in, holding out your hands like it’s nothing but Eddie knows exactly what Sammy is about to drop in your hands. He’s not quick enough when he leans forward though, 

“No, Bug, don’t-”

Several squirming worms drop down into your palms and he watches your eyes go wide. You don’t freak out or grimace though, instead you smile and extend your hands out further when your son drops more into the pile. 

Your smile is bright, cheeks popping and eyes shimmering and your laugh swirls around his heart as you speak to them in a way that makes his stomach flutter, “Woah you guys! Look at all these awesome worms!”

He watches in awe as you ask their names and sit patiently with wiggling worms in your hands as they point and poke at them and his daughter holds one up closer to your face and your eyes go wide and she giggles.

He’s a total and absolute goner. 

[sayingyournames]

speaking of devouring fics where sirius' gender has been trans-ed, do you have any recs?? i know some people don't like to recommend fics so feel free to ignore if that's your vibe!

yes, i do have recs for this! here are a few off the top of my head, in no particular order:

honey sweet by @vajazzly

explicit - ft. city boy sirus who is down bad for the beekeeper with horrible fashion sense (but he’s good with this hands)

gathering home by @quietlemonhush

explicit - sirius raising regulus & harry after literally burning down his family home, remus is reg’s teacher. heavy themes but overall very funny & sweet & tender.

suffer for the people - orphan account

remus is regulus’s camp counselor, has lil bit of a meltdown and asks for his brother who comes to visit to calm him down. feelings occur. sooo cute & comforting, very fluffy.

our destiny in the stars - orphan account

explicit - remus is insecure about his (plus size, disabled) body and decides to try online dating where matches can’t see what the other person looks like. he meets sirius (trans, a teacher) and they uh - hit it off. this fic makes me smile so damn big. it’s just - it’s a classic, i’ve read it a million times.

whatever words i say - orphan account

sirius can’t stop acting out and it’s stressing out the rest of his band, so lily hires remus to keep an eye on him. obviously, they fall in love. a sweet lil band au.

a fool and his money - orphan account

explicit - chronically ill remus is roommates with regulus, meets his rich older brother and agrees to an arrangement: pretend to date sirius, show up with him to events - in exchange for money. y’all can guess where this is going and it’s so good. love a good sugar daddy/fake dating fic.

abyss by @titstraction

explicit - highschool au, remus & sirius are both on the track team and can’t seem to the same page. this fic is - so good. it’s very much a comfort read for me, but there are some heavy themes and transphobic jokes. this fic will hurt your feelings but it will also make you giggle and kick your feet and scream into your pillow.

have time to grow by queer_and_trashy

explicit - queer professor & amateur poet remus meets trans professional poet sirius - they try to get their shit together. hot & sweet and just, deeply deeply gay.

the entire rock n’ pole verse by @jennandblitz and fivepips

explicit - ace rock climber remus meets genderfluid dancer (mainly pole) sirius. this ‘verse is huge, there’s literally millions of words of it and y’all - i’ve read all of it. incredible ace representation, and overall just very sweet and sappy. mild angst, but everyone is in love & has a happy ending so don’t worry!

living like we’re renegades - orphan account

explicit - cheerleader sirius + journalist remus = everything i’ve ever wanted. i loooove this sirius so much they’re so gender.

the prettiest star ‘verse by raging_queer

tattoo artist sirius meets single dad remus - actually, sirius meets his child, teddy. sweet bonding with teddy looking up to Elder Queer sirius. very fluffy and comforting.

staying strangers by 3amandcounting

the texting fic, my fave of all-time. genderfluid sirius & demisexual remus. if there is one fic out there that will just make you want to open a window and yell about it to the other townsfolk - it’s this one. idek how to explain it, it’s just - it’s perfect.

also most of my fic features trans sirius, my masterlist is pinned!

disclaimer: this list is non-exhaustive, i know i’ve forgotten some, and i will be updating this tomorrow when i’m not half-asleep. and y’all, please reply with your fave trans sirius fics bc i want to read them all!!

[desceros]

Hellooooo I’m 20 todayyyy it’s my birthday 🥳 (12/23) and I’d like to request a birthday sex one shot with Raphael idc which era but I like his personality the best in bayverse (can’t remember if you write for them) but basically reader has a bad day at work or school and goes down to the lair to chill with Raph their boyfriend he realizes he has never asked when readers birthday is and when they say today he drops everything and immediately makes the day about them he takes them back to their apartment and draws a relaxing bath cleans and makes a simple cake (with premade mix he found in the lair kitchen) then maybe he uses the frosting as a kind of worship for reader and licks it off their body doesn’t have to fit that at all if you want to add some pizazz then go ahead but thank youuuuu ❤️❤️❤️

(Symphony is so damn good btw)

ahhhh i just got this like. an hour ago bc i've been offline all day but!!!! happy birthday!!! it isn't exactly what you asked for since i wanted to get it out today on your actual birthday, but i hope you enjoy this lil thing :D raphael/reader; gn!reader; rated m

The moment he hears you telling Leo it's your birthday, he panics.

"What are you doing?" Donnie asks, coming into the kitchen in sniffing at the air. "Are you... baking a cake?"

"I'm focusin', Don, not now," Raph grits, frantically searching through the cabinets to find the icing. Thankfully, it's inside, untouched by icing-licking brothers, so he tosses it off to the side. "Can you, uh, go distract 'em for a bit?"

Donnie rolls his eyes. "You know they're going to ask where you are?"

Raph waves him off, so off he goes.

The cake itself is done before you come sniffing around, thank goodness. However, no one ever told him about waiting until it was cool to put the icing on, and it is in the middle of his near-meltdown at how it keeps oozing down the side that you enter the kitchen, miffed to have been kept away.

"Raph, what are you—?" you ask, only to pause when you see him glaring fiercely at a very sad-looking cake, his eyes going wide when he sees you coming in. God damn it, Donnie! "...Is that for me?"

"Uh," he starts, looking at the very sad, sad cake. Straightening from where he'd hunched over to try and fix the icing, he rubs at the back of his neck. "It was supposed to be. But, uh, this one doesn't look so good, huh?"

Laughing, you come up to stand next to him, trailing a finger through the melted icing and popping it in your mouth. "It might be the ugliest thing I've ever seen. But it tastes good!" Turning to face him, you smile, getting close and tilting your mouth to his invitingly. "Plus, you made it for me. That makes it the best."

Warm, Raph bends down and kisses the sweetness from your lips. He chases after you when you go to pull away, his fingers holding your jaw to keep you close.

"Tell you what," he murmurs, pulling away only when he feels you go pliant in his hold. "How's 'bout you 'n me go back to your place. Let me give you somethin' real nice?"

"Oh, yeah? What do you have in mind?" you ask, voice warbling a little even though you try to put on a brave front. It makes him smirk to hear the weakness he can so easily put into your knees, makes him feel like he's allowed to spew all the filth he wants into your ears.

"Well first, we'll stop by someplace nice and get you a proper cake," he says, tipping your head back and placing his mouth on your throat. "Then, I'm gonna take you home and get that nice big bath of yours goin' with all those pretty smellin' things in it you like that drive me crazy."

He feels you swallow against his mouth, prompting him to sink his teeth in until you whimper. Blood rushing in anticipation, he crowds you against the counter, licking at the mark he knows he's left there now.

"Then, when you're done, I'll fish you out, and use you as a plate for us to eat a slice of that pretty cake and lick the icing off you until you come at least three times. Maybe four if you're good for me."

Trailing his hands down your front to the hem of your shirt, he lets his fingers glide along your skin as he rubs his beak down your neck to burrow his head in your shoulder, nipping along the skin the whole way before he comes to whisper in your ear. Then, with just a hint of promise, he slides his thigh between your legs, pressing up, teasing, giving you a taste of what he wants.

"That sound like a plan?"

When you nod rapidly, hands desperately clutching at the counter behind you to help keep you upright and your breath coming too-fast, he pulls away and smirks, grabbing a finger of icing and dabbing it on your cheek before he licks it off in a heady promise.

"Good. Go say goodbye to the others. 'S gonna be a day or two before you leave your apartment once I get started with ya."

[atopvisenyashill]

Alysanne-Daughter-of-Maegor AU

Maegor Targaryen serves as his brother’s Hand for six months before eloping with Alys Harroway, a female line descendant of House Qoherys - and thus partially Valyrian, perfectly suitable as a bride for the increasingly desperate Maegor. Forced into exile by King Aenys, Alys births her first and only child in Pentos, who she names Alysanne.

After slaughtering every descendant of House Harroway - except his daughter - and naming Walton Towers as the new Lord of Harrenhal, a distraught Alysanne demands to know why her father has not chosen to bestow Harrenhal on her instead. In lieu of an apology, Maegor has her betrothed to Walton Towers’ grandson, Mathis Towers, who will one day inherit Harrenhal. Before the wedding feast ends, however, Maegor flies back to King's Landing, Alysanne in tow, and sends Mathis out to fight the Poor Fellows.

When Hand of the King Rogar and Queen Regent Alyssa decide it is time to send Alysanne to Harrenhal to take up her seat - and marry the last of Walton Towers' grandons, a sickly infant named for her father, 15 year old Jaehaerys absconds with Alysanne to Dragonstone where the two are married, though they do not consummate the marriage until nearly a year afterwards, when Jaehaerys reaches the age of majority in 52 AC.

Jaehaerys’ Seven Speakers work for him for far longer due to the delicate peace that could be upended by both the marriage to Alysanne and Jaehaerys’ conviction to marrying his children to each other. The Speakers travel for years, in between rests at Court, talking up the piety of sweet Alysanne as well as Doctrine of Exceptionalism that will one day apply to the King and Queen’s children at several points throughout their reign.

Alysanne convinces her husband to pass several laws throughout her lifetime and tenure as Queen Consort. Though called “Queen Alysanne’s Laws” in King’s Landing, there were many that referred to her influence as The Laws of Abomination, a way of undercutting the good Queen's judgement by invoking her father's madness and monstrosity. Regardless, these Laws of Abomination remain codified into Westerosi Law into the present day.

Though much of her reign as Queen was marked by the shadow of her father’s legacy, the realm began to soften towards Alysanne as she demonstrated a compassion, intelligence, and respect for propriety that far outmatched her father and even on occasion her husband. By the time her first grandchild is born, the smallfolk had started referring to her as Good Queen Aly for all the ways she had improved their lives.

some more explanations here for the nerds!

Talked before about my “lucas harroway was a female line descendant of the house qoherys” thing, but to go into more detail here: Quenton Qoherys was already an aged man when he was gifted Harrenhal by the Targaryens (this is canon), and was eager to move his large family into the seat. One of those that came with him from Dragonstone is his daughter Quannah (made her up) who had married and had children with Ser Lothston Harroway, a knight in service to the Targaryens at Dragonstone. The two had many children, including Lucas Harroway, who inherited Harrenhal through his mother when all of Quenton’s sons and grandsons had died. Yes I have essentially done a “Harry the Heir” in the Riverlands, thank YOU!

I messed with the timeline because otherwise Jaehaerys is just too much older than Alysanne for this to be a plausible “love” story - anything more than 4 years I think seems like Obvious Grooming whereas Jaehaerys and Alysanne have always been a more lowkey, "banality of evil" type relationship. So Jaehaerys is a lil younger and Maegor speed runs his meltdown lol.

If it’s unclear, Towers line goes Walton -> Jordan (Walton's son) -> Mathis (Jordan's first born son) -> A Bunch Of Other Sons -> Maegor Towers (Jordan's last son). But then Maegor is like “psyche my daughter is coming home with me” because now he’s obsessed with her and the fact that she is the Only child he managed to have.

I wanted to add more queens laws simply because I wanted to give her more proto social justicey causes that make sense for the time period. I tried to base it off legal rights women had not just in medieval Europe but, since we have the whole "Great Empire of the Dawn" background, Han China as well! I thought since Maegor jerks Aly around a lot, she’d codify laws regarding daughters the way she did widows. So Alysanne convinces Jaehaerys to codify-

A man cannot abandon his daughter. Daughter abandonment was a big historical issue and I think if brought to her attention, as a daughter with a deeply weird dad, she would pass something that says no, if you have a daughter with your wife, you have to care for her, you cannot just drop her off at some random person’s porch or leave her in the woods to die.

Matrilocal marriages have the same legal rights as patrilocal marriages. Basically, that if a husband moves in with his wife - whether it be because she married down & she’s living with her father or she inherited so her husband moved in with her - they should be treated equal under the law (I can really see like, Iron Islands especially being fucking deranged about matrilocal marriages, and since Jaehaerys is standardizing laws, this is a good one for her to champion).

If a woman is widowed, she must not be compelled to give up her husband’s business. She must be allowed to continue his business or, if SHE desires, sell it/rent the space/etc for a fair price to another tradesman. Merchant class women were usually allowed to take up their husband’s trade, but this is a series with prima noctus so I imagine this is not a standard thing across Westeros and once again something she would want enshrined into law.

If the only heir is a daughter, she must be treated as an heiress because a daughter comes before an uncle. This one I think would really gnaw at her - Maegor essentially takes what should be her seat (as the only Harroway left alive because he just slaughtered her family!) and divvies it up between some random ass knights, then in an attempt to curb her willfulness, Rogar lets those random knights keep her damn castle. It’s her last link to her mother! Too bad, it’s someone else’s now. She can’t take Harrenhal back without looking Maegor-esque but she can make damn sure that if all that’s left is a daughter, that girl has the legal protection to claim her seat! Essentially, Alysanne introduces the title “heir presumptive” into law and gives that title some rights and protections.

I also came up with backstories for her Ladies Court that tie into the Maegor change:

Barba Towers - as a way of trying to make some peace with Jordan Towers’ sons, she takes one of his daughters as a lady when she visits Harrenhal for the first time since her mother's murder during her and Jaehaerys' first progress. To fit with the Harrenhal curse, Barba dies of the same Shivering Sickness little Daenerys dies of.

Poppy Butterwell - If you look through the history of House Butterwell, they seem kind of, um, skeevy. So I decided that the concept of daughter abandonment comes up when Alysanne and Jaehaerys go on their first progress. Butterwell abandons one of his daughters after having several in a row and no sons, and she's taken in by some random innkeeper in town (which is also why she has a more peasant-esque name - her father doesn't bother naming her). When Alysanne holds her women's court in Harroway's Town and puts the pieces together, she takes Poppy in, arranges a match - marrying Poppy high above her station - and starts pushing to pass laws protecting girl children.

Donella Darry - Another lady she takes from Harrenhal, though not until after Barba Towers dies. House Darry is a prominent and consistent supporter of House Targaryen in the Riverlands, and Maegor gives the Harroway holdings (outside of Harrenhal and Harroway's Town) to House Darry. This is a relationship I imagine is a bit strained - Barba and Poppy are both young naive girls in need of guidance but Donella just kind of exists as this mirror version of Alysanne - an eldest daughter jerked around from holding to holding by her father. I like the idea of Donella being heir presumptive of the Darry lands after her brothers die during the Shivering Sickness, and this is how Alysanne gets involved in inheritance laws for girls.

Arwen Sunderland - I wanted to give the Arryns a reason for acting so deranged towards Daella later on (Rodrik’s daughters are so fucking WEIRD my god), so Alysanne asks Arwen Sunderland to be one of her ladies over Rodrik’s daughters. Aly means nothing by it, she’s merely trying to reach out to the Sunderlands, given how unruly they can be, but because it’s early in her reign, and everyone is reading Maegor-esque behavior into her actions, they assume she means it as an insult, and project that onto poor Daella, which makes the Arryn girls hostile to her, and assume a level of spoiled behavior from the very scared Daella.

Elyse Marbrand - I figured after being forced to watch all her aunts, uncles, cousins, grandparents, on and on be slaughtered by Maegor, Alysanne would be obsessive about finding distant relations. Since Rhaenys and Visenya were big on marrying houses and regions that had some beef, I thought an arrangement between the Riverlands and the Westerlands would work well, and since the Marbrand's are a pretty important house, I figured that was a good match. So to simplify Quenton Qoherys + Elinor Tully -> Alarra Qoherys + Andros Marbrand -> Elyse Marbrand, aka a distant relation of Alysanne’s (through Quenton). Elyse stays at Court even after she’s had children of her own, though, because her husband, Theon of White Barrow, is a beloved musician and patron of Alysanne’s at Court.

Patronages - Queens often acted as culture makers for the kingdoms and Alysanne already does this in canon so I wanted to add a little more with ��Maegor flavoring✨for her to do and I thought Alysanne acting as a patroness would fit into this well. Again, a little breakdown on my decisions here-

Coryanne Wylde - Coryanne is already a writer in canon and I thought it would be so funny, given how scandalized everyone is over what she writes, if Alysanne is the one bankrolling her. I like to imagine Coryanne kept writing really weird and sexual stories and Alysanne loved it; like medieval romantasy writing haha. I think Alysanne kept this one a secret though because while she did find it amusing, she didn’t want people to think her lascivious like her parents, and in fact Coryanne takes great pains to always depict her Queen characters as sexually untouchable but not prudish either.

Septa Lyra - Lyra is again one of the women sent to be Alysanne’s ladies maid while she & Jaehaerys are in dragonstone. One thing about women writers in medieval times is they were often nuns and they often wrote non fiction about whatever it is they were studying. I thought given Alysanne’s disapproval of the Maesters not allowing women in their ranks, she’d want to undercut them a bit by bankrolling a few female scholars. But ALSO I was thinking given Maegor’s war against the Faith, Alysanne would go to great pains to make sure she’s seen as pious. So Lyra mostly writes about religions in Terros and midwifery.

Septa Violante - She is one of the Seven Speakers and I figured they’re not doing this shit for free! Alysanne rewards Violante by basically writing her a blank check. Violante writes all sorts of field guides, histories of the various castles throughout Westeros, and even several legal works explaining the historical precedent for Alysanne’s Laws of Abomination.

Arwen Sunderland (again) - Arwen writes prose and poetry and while she’s not as salacious as Coryanne, she does have a fondness for stories that take place in war torn kingdoms, going into detail about the fighting and injuries. Her prose and poetry is much more scandalous so Alysanne keeps the identity of the author a secret - BUT makes it clear she is the patroness for that author. The prevailing theory is in fact that Arwen Sunderland wrote the books, something Gyldayn summarily dismisses as nonsense of course.

Theon of White Barrow - One of the only men Alysanne was ever patroness for, Theon is a nephew of Theomore Manderly who lives in the barrowlands. Alysanne arranges a marriage for Theon with one of her own ladies, Elys Marbrand (Aly canonically arranged a match for one of Theonore’s nephews). Theon, who stands to inherit only a modest holding in the barrowlands, opts to stay at court when the Queen becomes fond of his singing, eventually writing many songs and mummer’s shows for the Queen. The reality, however, is that Theon was not the writer - Elys Marbrand wrote all of his music and stories. Theon, Elys, and Alysanne were so close that during the First Quarrel, when Alysanne opted to hide out in Harroways’s Town soon after her husband vacated the Riverlands, the pair came with her to play music for her there as well.

Septa Elinor Costayne - listen. Alysanne spends a tumultuous childhood being jerked around Pentos and Westeros by her parents, is hauled back to KL and given several new mommies to make up for murdering her first one, only for all her stepmothers to be tortured to death as well. I think Alysanne would develop extreme attachment anxiety to both Rhaena and Elinor in the hell that is the last few years of her father’s life. While Rhaena is a complicated matter - I love their relationship as sisters and I think a 'doesn't want to be the evil stepmother but can't help resenting aly' dynamic would be just as rich as their canon relationship, so they are still CLOSE while trapped in KL - I have never liked that Elinor disappears to become a Septa!!! So I made the executive decision to disregard canon in this instance and have Alysanne guilt Elinor into staying in the capital with her, under the guise of being a patroness for Elinor to follow her passions. Even as Alysanne ages and outgrows the need for a mother, and Elinor stays only because she feels indebted for her life and obligated to care for this strange, disturbed woman, Elinor is writing all sorts of essays and papers so she has something to do. Kind of the equal and opposite of Alysanne's relationship with Gael - putting another woman in arrested development because she doesn't know how to cope with her own traumas pressing down on her.

[verdemoun]

I'm legitimately thinking about the gang witnessing big events. Bessie was probably there when USSR collapsed. The gang and 9/11. Big advances in queer rights in general (I can definitely see Bill telling someone to turn up the radio after he hears a snippet). Covid, fucking covid. And that's just a few. That must've been wild. I can see some of the newcomers getting overwhelmed - the world has never seemed like this in their first life. There was never so much happening.

(i can also see Lenny fucking thriving; boy loves studying. I can DEFINITELY see him asking Bessie about events she witnessed before anyone arrived.)

I'M SO SORRY THIS WAS EATEN BY DRAFTS PLEASE ENJOY

Side shuffling around the gang living through 9/11 as a non-American who was alive but too busy shoving crayons up my nose to fully understand the devastation from 9/11 from a global perspective I am not going to attempt that But a) it definitely contributed to Arthur's fear of flying b) it was the first time the gang were seriously agitated by Bessie's no guns in the house rule because all the safety they had worked towards finding in modern era was ripped away from them and c) they would have been very bothered by the sheer amount of racism it inspired they did not go through 1899 bigotry just to watch it be born again.

QUEER RIGHTS MY PASSION

The gang were all over that shit they may still have a bit of that 1899 assumes pronouns and don't fully understand some LGBTQIA+ identities but most of them needed a hobby and keeping up to date with how queer rights were being adapted into civil rights was a whole gang affair.

Arthur hot for voting rights Morgan out there accidentally intimidating people to vote for parties that openly supported pro-lgbtqia+ agendas.

The number one thing Isaac never got in trouble from the gang for protesting no matter how much actual legal trouble he got into. He was wearing skirts and dresses to school to protest gendered uniforms, he was punching protestors in the face (maybe a lil trouble for that one but not nearly as much as he probably should have been), vandalizing homophobic signs and billboards he was out fighting.

Arthur picking him up from holding after teen Isaac got caught vandalizing a homophobic billboard and instead of a lecture Isaac gets McDonalds on the way home.

Bill didn't say outright it was to celebrate gay marriage finally being legalized but the day it was confirmed gay marriage was going nation-wide he invited everyone over for the biggest boozy cook-out ever and internalized homophobia be damned my boy can work a grill.

Also poor Bessie having to be the one to explain to the 1899 gang when they timewarped in 1999 that same-sex intercourse was still technically a crime and if anything the laws around it had gotten more explicitly anti-gay since 1899 when every single one of them was a little slice of fruit cake - the absolute riot she had to deal with in her living room.

COVID

Arthur was a nervous wreck. He died of the last plague and is absolutely convinced covid-19 would be his second demise. Comes off as really aggressive about people wearing masks and sanitizing their hands but in private Charles is fully aware he is absolutely terrified. Like paling as the death toll rises Charles having to convince him to turn off the news before he has a meltdown.

Arthur was living lockdown style even before lockdown was announced would not leave the house, sprayed any groceries left at the door with disinfectant, insisted Charles get changed out of outside-contaminated clothes before he walked into the house ect.

Charles had to be a very patient, loving supportive husband. Many bird houses and loafs of bread were made.

The gang very nearly shackled Hosea to the couch because his attitude was 'bah how many epidemics have i survived already' despite being an elderly smoker with pre-existing lung issues.

On his way home the day lockdown was announced Lenny bought as much gym equipment as he could fit in his car and while Sean absolutely went insane not being able to go out and do things he did accidentally get shredded because he would spend hours in the temporary home gym trying to burn energy.

Jack immediately dipped. Grabbed a suitcase and moved into Isaac's because being trapped at home with John, Uncle, Abigail and Addie would have resulted in someone being sent to hospital for grievous bodily injuries.

Kieran thrived. Objectively the peak of his neurodivergent and mental health. No cars? Reduced people in stores? 3ft apart? It was the first time he could leave the house without noise-cancelling headphones (still took them but wore them around his neck in bliss upon realizing how quiet it was). Jumped at the chance to go to the store or drop off things because he loved leaving the house when the world was so much more quiet.

Also little people-watcher knew exactly what things to drop off to just make someone's day a little less bad. Favorite snacks, fidgets, movies they'd love, craft kits. A lot of the gang were really grateful for how well Kieran actually knew them and looked forward to the random texts of presents left at the door-step.

Sulked when restrictions were taken away he was glad the pandemic was considered over but also having to retreat to those supports because outside was too overwhelming again. (i'm projecting)

Micah got covid twice during peak pandemic, was almost hospitalized the first time, and still anti-vac.

[baby--charchar]

Tell us about Rhea and Vaggie. It's ok if it's a lil dark, my OCs dark too if I were to go into detail.

Okay!

Tw: Mention of suicide with moderate description.

Rhea

Rhea is...something alright. She spawned within the pool of the renovated hotel one early morning, and floated around aimlessly until she found her bearings. Vaggie came in a few hours later to do a routine check before the pool opened to guests, and there was just this little water spirit creature taking up residence. She coaxed Rhea out of the water, got her a hoodie and a lollipop to keep her comfortable, and sat her in her office while she made a VERY angry phone call to heaven.

Apparently, heaven in all their "glory" were prioritizing those who had committed suicide on the path to redemption. And what better way to set a wayward sinner on the right track was to spawn her directly into the hotel the moment she died! Lute thinks this is just fucking hilarious, because naturally she's the one who picked up the phone when Vaggie called.

"FINE BUT YOU BETTER SEND DOWN HER GODDAMN FILE TOO, YOU CAN'T JUST BE SPAWNING GUESTS IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HOTEL WHEN WE'RE NOT PREPARED-" "Already in your desk, Vajjie~ Have a good day!" *click*

Rhea was a 23 year old earthling with both autism and moderate hearing loss. She had a history of abuse and medical neglect as a child. She made the decision to commit suicide, which Vaggie came in knowing. Vaggie was not however ready for the graphic description of her method, involving both cutting and drowning in the nearby ocean. Rhea was an avid swimmer and always found peace in the water; in that moment, she felt like she was "going home." This is the reason behind her fish like appearance with multiple cuts on her body.

Vaggie takes Rhea under her wing more than any other guest. They don't really use the word 'regression,' although it is what it is. Rhea is anxious, jumpy, and rather unpredictable. She needs lots of support and check ins to make it through the day. Without a lot of support, she can have meltdowns and shutdowns. She can also self isolate SEVERELY, so Vaggie is constantly coaxing her to stay around other people.

Charlie LOVES HER to pieces. Thinks she's such a sweetheart (despite the horrible meltdowns, screaming, thrashing, and breaking things). Working with her is a challenge because of the communication barrier; no one at the hotel signs and interpreters aren't readily available in Hell. Right now Rhea uses little communication cards on a lanyard around her neck, but of course they won't meet all her needs. Charlie sticks to play therapy and art therapy with her, things where language isn't the only way to communicate.

Vaggie is doing everything she can to learn sign language. She's got a few signs down that are vital for caregiving: yes/no, come here, sit, good girl, eat, hug, swim, and sorry. It's not much, but it always seems to help Rhea work her way down from a crying fit.

Rhea is painfully shy and introverted. Does NOT like group activities, being in a crowd, or spending time in the lobby/public areas of the hotel. She honestly wants to be a quiet little shut in, but Charlie and Vaggie are gonna get her past that.

When Rhea has hit or social limit, needs space, or is just in a bad mood, she dashes into the pool. She can stay underwater for up to an hour and ignore everyone, which to Vaggie is a huge no-no. Of course, Rhea is fast, and once she's determined, then chasing after her is like chasing after a greased up piglet.

She gets SOME pool time. She really likes the sensory aspects of being in the pool, so she often just hangs out by the waterfall or fountains, letting the spray beat at her skin. She can sit there for hours just being with water. Vaggie knows it's GOOD for her to have sensory time, she just can't live in their pool, dammit!

Her room is basically a sensory room with a deep-ocean theme. Blue LED lights, a swing, plush carpet, and a massive TV.

Vaggie helps her get to bed (which Rhea loves, she is a very sleepy baby), as well as get up in the morning (which Rhea hates, she is a VERY SLEEPY BABY). It takes a lot of coaxing to get her up and ready for the day.

Small side note: Lucifer makes pancakes for the whole hotel on Friday mornings at the bar. Friday is the ONLY day Vaggie doesn't have to fight tooth and nail to get her up. Rhea loves watching Lucifer pour the batter and see all the little bubbles come up. He already knows to add chocolate chips to all 3 of hers! It's their little weekly routine.

[kpchrs]

What do you think Caroline thinks of Nathan?

Ah, it's Anon again.

Tsk tsk tsk.

What, you mean Caroline Prescott: Sean Prescott's wife, Nathan's and Kristine's mum, the lady who only got mentioned thrice by OTHER PEOPLE in emails and a letter, the lady whose face and hair colour we don't even know?

HOW SHOULD I KNOW?

Okay, that's all, thank you for coming to my Ted Talk,

Kris

...Hehe, just joking. I'll work on what we have on canon. I have to over-overanalyse things tho.

So as I have said, what we know about Caroline is only mentioned in emails and a letter: Kristine's, Sean's, and Dr Jacobi's.

Kristine's email to Nathan:

"And yes, mother told me that you've been in trouble and father has been on your ass..."

It sounds like Kristine contacts Caroline regularly. Seeing that there is no complaint about Caroline in the rest of the email, I think she still has at least a decent relationship with Caroline. That means, she still has interests in her kids. Thank goodness. Since the rest of the email is about Sean and has no complaint about Caroline, I'm guessing it's Sean who is the "only" problem here.

We don't see the severity of Sean's abuse, but if that can make Kristine, a seemingly great older sister, run away; knowingly leaving an obviously beloved little brother alone in this kind of environment, I think we can imagine it.

Sean's email to Nathan:

"Nate, I know this has been a stressful week and your mother and I are here to talk if need be. Just make an appointment anytime. Your mother wants Doctor Bill to come out after his book tour but for now let's stick to your prescriptions."

I know he's a businessman, but an appointment? To your own kid? Okay, asshole. Does Caroline need to be booked in the appointment too? Is she also in the business? It sounds like Caroline is involved with Nathan's treatment at least. I don't really know what subtext to make out from the first part of the last sentence, if any. But, I guess, she at least can give opinions to Sean, normally. Maybe.

Dr Jacobi's letter to Sean:

"You have ignored my requests for a consultation with you and your wife so I have to assume you are no longer interested in my services. Regardless, I care about Nathan and I believe he needs serious help."

Dr Jacobi only talks to Sean here. He's like the top authority in the family, I get it, but it's like Sean is the only parent available. The doc seems very desperate because he believes it's dangerous to not help Nathan as soon as possible. If it were me, I would try to contact Caroline directly as well. Does he try? Is he able to? Does Caroline listen?

Dr Jacobi is Nathan's previous psychiatrist who "fires" him because of the lack of family cooperation. The doc wants to work on it seriously, he sees problems in Sean's parenting that are largely Nathan's stressor.

Since the doc is denied repetitively and so decided to terminate Nathan's therapy, I assume Sean searches for another psychiatrist who is not that "fussy" with Nathan's treatment. So maybe...this Dr Bill...is not a good psychiatrist. I mean, if he is really based on Dr Phil, that just confirms that he's a bad, unethical one.

Has Caroline ever taken THE INITIATIVE to TALK to Nathan directly? I don't know. Canon gives us nothing. And see this: in Kristine's email, it really sounds like lecturing Nathan was a regular thing she did when she was still at home. An older sibling lecturing a younger sibling is not rare. I did that too to my lil bro, my big bro did that too to us sometimes. But something tells me that the one who tells him to stand up to Sean is only Kristine, never Caroline. Just an intuition.

This is like searching for cookie crumbs on the floor but see this about Victoria talking about Nathan:

"Yes, he takes serious meds but that's not his fault. His family treats him like a total freak, just because he has little meltdowns."

Throughout the game, they establish that Sean is the menacing, terrifying, asshole figure. But Victoria interestingly generalises with "family" which means it can include Kristine too (but I refuse to believe so hehe), but most importantly it can also include Caroline as well. Using Victoria's words, Caroline might treat him like a "freak" because of his mental illness.

Btw, this is very obvious because duh, but what we know about Caroline is filtered from another person's point of view. Delving into her possible mind is hard. Kristine might hear a passive and neutral, "Nathan isn't doing what's expected of him and Sean isn't happy" from Caroline and Kristine with her already anti-Sean mind paraphrased it very strongly and made it sound like Caroline is more opinionated. I think various kinds of characterisation are possible here. But, in general, I can think of two?

The cold mum. Distant. Or at least not openly affectionate.

The "Team Sean Prescott" mum. "Your dad is right, Nathan", "your dad says that for your own good, Nathan", "you need to do as he said, Nathan", "it's just the way he is", "he did that not to hurt you, Nathan", etc.

Okay, she can be both.

Whatever characterisation in the list she has, if she lets Sean be his abusive self and does no intervention, that sounds like a bystander parent to me. Maybe she is a Sean-minded person and that's why she lets it be. Maybe she lets Sean be in charge of Nathan's education because "let me, Caroline, Nathan must learn about the Prescott legacy from me", so she is just a yes woman. Maybe she knows Sean's treatment is wrong, but she's afraid to oppose him for a reason. Dunno. Anything is possible.

Bystander parents confuse the kid, btw. It complicates their feelings on the trauma and the parent, because "I'm angry at my abusive dad but I'm also angry at my mum for never protecting me. But she never treats me like Dad did, am I allowed to get hurt because of her inaction?" The bystander effect hurts the abuse victim too, but I digress since we are on the topic of Caroline's thoughts on Nathan, not his thoughts on her.

TLDR; I think Caroline cares about Nathan and his well-being to some degree, despite the possibility of thinking that his mental illness is a burden on the family. There's no canon information of her communicating with him directly, because, well, canon gives us nothing. From the zero complaints Kristine has of her, she might not treat Nathan like Sean does, but she might enable Sean's treatment of him thus making her a bystander parent.

Well, in the end, this is just a theory, a game theory. Nathan never talks about his mum, so I really don't know what she's like. He is especially hung up on his dad, pushing him to search for validation from a father figure in the form of Jefferson.

Caroline is a blank slate. Any interpretation or effort to fill in the blanks fanfic authors do for her (dead, not biological mum, assumingly in a mental hospital, emotionally unavailable, neglectful, physically and verbally abusive, abused turned abuser, mentally ill, having Nathan as a mirror of herself thus can't face him at all, etc.), the possibility is endless, and I enjoy all I have read.

Okay, that's all from a Nathan-biased person.

Thank you for the ask,

Kris

[sharpth1ng]

Kid billy and stu hcs (omyb ❤️)

- Stu the type of kid to draw on his face and skin a lot and he’d come home looking like a human canvas. Also probably tried eating a crayon at least once because they look yummy

- billy had a tooth gap top front and centre

- stu had an underbite (projecting cuz I had an underbite and have had to go through orthodontic hell most my life, but I don’t think stu would of had it as bad as me. also dog moment ✌️)

- whenever billy got in trouble in school Nancy was 100% one of those moms that stood by her kid no matter what he did

- Billy would encourage Stu to do stupid shit that got him in trouble but stu would never snitch on billy for his involvement, also he probably just wanted to do it anyway

- Billy was kinda afraid/grossed out by bugs but Stu would be like, collecting them in the school yard. When Stu sees Billy’s disliking of bugs Stu would try to squish them if Billy was ever freaked out by one

YES OMYB. WHAT A MEAL.

I also have the hc of Stu turning himself into a human canvas. Also bc he would have that white blonde hair that blonde ppl have when they're young he was def colouring his hair with markers too. He's def eating crayons. And glue.

GAP TOOTH BILLY HELP. I didn't know I needed this but wow I NEEDED THIS. PRECIOUS. BABY.

Especially accepting underbite Stu bc it means he and Billy probably would have had braces/headgear at the same time. Also I've just decided that Randy was born with basically perfect teeth and never had to have braces. Billy hates him for this.

But also oof poor lil autistic Billy at the orthodontist. Hell if you're undiagnosed and all the adults in your life treat you like your meltdowns are tantrums

Nancy would be showing up at the school like "did you personally witness my son pushing that kid off the swings? No? The I don't see how you could possibly know that kid isn't lying. Billy is a gentle, sweet boy, how dare you."

Absolutely Billy would be the devil on Stu's shoulder, and Stu does not have an angel over the other shoulder so they're just trouble. Definitely being forced not to sit together in class.

Wahhh Stu squishing bugs for him is so cute stooooooppppp

In conclusion, YES. I need to come up with something so I can write them as kids!

[1moreoffkeyanthem]

melda tâe, pray tell: what are the ojv!style/starsev's favorite foods? <3

HELLO MELMË!!! Oooo this is such a fun ask ilysm and I love any excuse to be Incredibly Annoying abt the OrangeJuiceVerse so YEP HERE WE GO!!!

Kyle- Kyle SO has a sweet tooth!!! (I love that that’s a universal Kyle hc btw) that boy is THERE for any baked goods deadass even those shitty gas station packaged muffins (Stan is scribbling out the nutritional information (or as he calls it, Food Lore, well into their 30s)) and Kyle def consumes anything sugary. As for actual real food, he likes Italian a lot which works very well bc pasta is a general hit w everyone. Favorite fast food place is subway and he ALWAYS rearranges the sandwich components to make sure the distribution is right (he claims he doesn’t have obsessive compulsive tendencies) (he does) so this guy is THE reason the ojv is called the ojv, his favorite beverage is orange juice with seven ice cubes and a pinch of salt bc he’s picky even when he claims to not be, he’s also a red wine enjoyer

STAN!!! Oh my god he and Cartman and Kenny are bottomless pits!!! Stan is a big boi and he’s packing away everything he eats bc 1) he hates waste, and 2) he’s just hungry. BUT he’s really more of a savory guy. Veggie king, ofc, and he’s at every fast food place in town ordering any vegetarian option, ALSO!!! This man LOVES spicy food but his stomach doesn’t. He’ll get a couple crunchwraps sub refried beans and slather that shit in Diablo sauce, but there’s a pretty good chance he’s gonna be nauseous a few hours later. Also he loves Kyle’s cooking!!! Bc Ky likes to cook when he’s stressed and Stan likes Kyle, and Kyle makes this really kickass homemade bread (jalapeño cheese bread oh my god I really want some now) Stan is also SO bad at drinking water but he is in fact a soda enjoyer. Miller Lite and the cheapest vodka known to man (before he stopped drinking) are a staple, also he frequents the local smoothie king and gets a chocolate hulk. For most of their life style has been ordering an olive and pineapple pizza. Stan always dips it in extra marinara.

Tweek- he is seriously just a snacker. Like Girl Dinner has nothing on Tweek Dinner. His meals look like a Charlie Brown thanksgiving. If he even remembers food is a thing. But like Craig will come home and be like “what do u want for dinner” and Tweek’s like “oh I ate a whole jar of pickles” the amount of half eaten granola bars in that house smh. BUT he can decimate so much garlic bread. A very big lemonade fan.

Craig! He’ll eat whatever, nonchalant KING unless!!!! He’s having a bad day and is already on the cusp of a meltdown. If he’s overstimulated it’s a sprite and an uncrustable. A grape uncrustable. Also I just feel like he likes seafood? I cannot explain why, but he does. Also he’s really good about hydration, he likes routine and he has one of those bottles w the time markers lmao. And he’s weirdly pretentious abt craft beers like when he and Kyle take their lil excursions to their spot he’s drinking an ipa that’s lowkey gross but then he’s just shrugging at Kyle and being all “idk the citrus hits in the aftertaste” like an asshole.

KENNY ok Kenny is also not picky in the slightest, how could he be with how he grew up, but I feel like he’s especially fond of easy meals like casseroles, frozen pizza, that kind of stuff. When he starts actually making a stable living off his art he hits up ALL the local food trucks and small businesses and broadens his food knowledge, and he’s keeping the smaller struggling businesses going just by his support. He is another example of ojv losers not drinking enough water, thinks Mountain Dew counts, literally he would’ve developed scurvy in college if left to his own devices. SMH ily kenneth also he and Stan have both thrown up bc they tried to one up each other doing shots of hot sauce

Marj my queen! She, like Kyle, likes sugar, if the homies are going to a diner she’s getting pancakes, and she takes her coffee ALL dressed up. Also kenny is the grillmaster and Marj is making the BEST sides for the bbq!!! Omg she loves her some pasta salad and a lil shrimp shishkabab moment like put this girl on the cover of a southern living magazine with her sweet iced tea (she makes the best sweet tea) marj my goddess pls quit causing problems on the internet and just use ur hospitality degree to run a b&b and make the best biscuits and gravy ever

Cartman. Bruh. Eric Cartman. He has THE most expensive taste known to man when he’s older but until he gets into the Rich People scene he doesn’t really care about what he’s eating or if it’s of good quality. In college he dragged the m5 to some shitty steakhouse bc he heard it was a good deal, and also bc he was mad at Stan for belting As Long As You’re Mine from Wicked and he knew Stan wouldn’t have any food options there lmfao that asshole (he did have to put a dollar in the Fuckwad Jar). He will also eat the weirdest combination of things. Who is putting whipped cream and chocolate syrup on fried chicken? This man. He is a Diet Coke enjoyer lmfao also he drinks martinis with olives bc “it makes me look sexy and kewl” he doesn’t like olives btw he’s just an asshole

I HAD TOO MUCH FUN WITH THIS!!! The ask is always open for ANY of my AU’s or if ur just bored or want fic recs I’m a huge loser and my sp obsession is ever ridiculous.

[lokiina]

Man, shout out to my power ally store manager????

I had a hot garbage start to my day. Like full dumpster fire mood from the get go. Still sick, had a trash sleep... then I guess my brain decided to bonk me with like everything hate about myself in one go. A+ brain thank you for that. 🙃

More under the cut for anyone curious enough I suppose.

So I had a lil meltdown on my own. Got it out of my system, or ya know... thought I did. I decided to go to my shift anyway. Ready to win an Oscar for my masking performance, ya know?

And there's nothing like some more major inconveniences to really open up the door for meltdown number 2.

Bus 1, re routed to stop on a different street due to construction. Okay, no problem, just a bit more of a walk. Go to where the signs tell me. Queue the bus going down the normal route instead and missing me entirely.

Oh.

Okay, parents live near by maybe they can come get me and get me to work on time. Parents are at the other end of the city.

Oh.

Okay there's another bus maybe I can get to it in tiiii- it drives away before I can get there.

Oh.

Queue frustrated meltdown number 2. 🙃 at this point I'm like 🤏 close to saying fuck it and going back home. Crawling into bed and calling it a day.

But. I call work, tell them I'm gonna be probably late.

Manage to finally find another bus. But at this point I'm one "how are you?" From another just complete crack. So I'm hiding in the warehouse to get my shit together enough to be on the floor.

Store Manager finds me and can always see right through me when no one else can wtf. I swear it's a super power??? Or it's cuz she's a mom. I dunno.

But she asked if I needed to talk so we just kinda went to her office for a while and fam lemme tell you. I was not expecting a hype life encouragement with like properly pursuing specific transition steps talk at work? But here we are. She has a non binary kid btw so she's no stranger to like convos that go into queer topics that tend to be odd for most people.

I might have a lot of shit to talk about the company as a whole, but I gotta say the people I directly work with are pretty fuckin solid. I think that's why I've stayed as long as I have.

Anyway I survived. Go me I guess. 🙃

[wr0temyway0ut]

Pssst I'm a sucker for kidfic can you tell us about Sunset skater kid fic plz and thank you

OH BOY CAN I

So this is set in my We Could All Be the Best Kind of Friends series where Sunset Curve are all dating each other and meet Willie bc he’s the Rolling Stone reporter who does their first cover interview and they end up bringing him into their relationship. Bobby is also dating Ray and Rose (which will be established in another fic I’m working on). I’ve decided to refer to them collectively as the Greater Sunset Polycule after the Greater Phantoms Polycule My Beloved

And so the kid fic needs a lil backstory, which is that the band decided they wanted to adopt kids together. They decided that Luke and Willie would be the ones to apply, because Willie has the most stable job as a reporter and Luke technically makes more than the rest of the band as the lead singer and songwriter. So they applied, and then over the course of the next two years they repeatedly got their hopes up and then hearts broken after adoption after adoption fell through for one reason or another. During this time, Ray and Rose (who are t4t) got pregnant with Julie, and the boys kind of gave up on adopting and devoted their energy to helping with the new baby. Until Bobby (who is trans) decided fuck it, we want a kid we should have a kid, I’ll be the one to carry it. Alex and Reggie (the only cis guys) did the swirl method to determine a donor and nine (miserable) months later (pregnant Bobby is a Monster) when Carrie came out with little wisps of blonde hair they all knew Alex was the father, but put Reggie on the birth certificate so they both have an “official” link to Carrie.

Fast forward four years, which is when this fic begins. Carrie and Julie are four, and Ray is pregnant with Carlos. They’re all happy, and have completely forgotten about the adoption thing. Until Willie gets a call. There’s a four year old named Flynn who needs a home, and they want to move fast because the group home she’s in is overcrowded and Luke and Willie seemed like a good match. And so the fic is the whole polycule deciding if they should adopt Flynn or not (spoiler alert of course they do) and welcoming her into their family.

Snippet below the cut!

They end up choosing Luke, because even though they share no DNA, Carrie is basically a mini copy of him. The rest of them are there as backup, because if the way Carrie reacted when they told her about the baby is any indication, they need all hands on deck for the inevitable nuclear meltdown.

“Okay, girls,” Luke sighs, once they’ve gotten the girls settled with ice cream. “You know how you’re gonna have a new sibling soon?”

Julie perks up, looking around the room. “Is the baby here?”

“No, honey,” Reggie chuckles. “They’re still in Papi’s tummy.”

Julie slumps in disappointment while Carrie eyes Ray’s stomach as if a demon is going to pop out of it. Not a great sign for what’s about to come.