#and I am mocked in the local forever after

[sanguinarysanguinity]

You’re actually a Sherlock Holmes character come to life, from a little seaside town and knows all the terribly fascinating and nautical goings-ons

Me and Watson have a good jaw about the sea novel he's reading, and whether or not the author got all the nautical details right.

(Watson takes the position that it doesn't MATTER if you get the details right, so long as you tell a GOOD YARN. Holmes, who is splayed out on the ground licking the caulking, snorts derisively.)

[asvidema]

ok now i got happiness that is going to last for hours

[808airsoftbros]

Christmas Wish (Female Idols)

Author: Merry Christmas everyone, here is my special holidays oneshot. I may or may not write a New Year's special sequel as I did plan to write a smut into this but I didn't have the time and energy spent on the Holiday mayhem. Anyway, hope you enjoy and if you want to check out more stories go to Masterlist.

Silent night, holy night All is calm, all is bright Round yon Virgin, Mother and Child Holy Infant so tender and mild Sleep in heavenly peace Sleep in heavenly peace

Silent night, holy night Shepherds quake at the sight Glories stream from heaven afar Heavenly hosts sing Alleluia Christ the Savior is born Christ the Savior is born

Silent night, holy night Son of God, love's pure light Radiant beams from Thy holy face With the dawn of redeeming grace Jesus Lord, at Thy birth Jesus Lord, at Thy birth

Y/N's POV

It was another night of singing Christmas carols in my local church theatre, just like every year on the holidays. Despite the years that had passed, everyone showed up in droves, and family and friends came together.

Some are apart for most of the year for study or work, and seeing them come together again as a union once more makes me envy them.

My whole life I grew up as an orphan, I don't even know what my family looks like or what it's even like to have one. I was unwanted, cast aside, and not even worth a penny in this society.

Then why do I sing these stupid Christmas carols? I don't even know myself... Maybe because it's all I know because there's nowhere to go? Perhaps.

But the real reason doesn't matter much now, does it? No, not really. I don't even know the meaning of life, and I have no idea of my purpose.

"Ladies and gentlemen, I thank you all for taking the time to come to this wonderful Christmas chorale this evening! It was such a pleasure to always host this yearly tradition in this glamorous town! And it's such a wonderful feeling seeing all of you reunited with family and friends you may not have seen in years, now, please give a warm applause to our singers!" The host spoke to the crowd and they all cheered as they clapped the sounds echoing in the church.

As we all dispersed from our group, I didn't even bother staying for the after-party as nobody cared about me and wouldn't notice I was gone. I knew I was simply a meaningless character in the background of everyone's story.

Once I walked inside the comfort of my apartment I sighed as I closed the door, I sat down on the couch cracking open a bottle of apple soju from the fridge just dazing in my thoughts.

"Silent night~. Holy night~. Yeah, shut the fuck up..." I said to myself as that stupid chorale was stuck playing in my head as if the Universe was mocking me.

Why does my life fucking suck? I don't know and I don't even care at this point... Because what's the point in life anymore?

Everyone has a purpose in life, whether to be working, being a celebrity for everyone to admire and fan over, or whatever that may be. But here I am slouching in my apartment like a waste of space in this world.

What is my damn purpose here? To be a pathetic joke and stain on society? Wow, what a way to start my life and this will likely stay that way forever.

Looking at the clock, I sighed deeply as it was nearly time for me to go to work, I slipped on my shopkeeper's uniform before heading into the store to relieve my co-worker who was wrapping up his shift for the day.

"Ah, Merry Christmas, Y/N, right on time as usual," He greeted and I nodded.

"Busy today?" I asked and he nodded.

"Yup, the store's been packed with tourists all day, but tonight should be slow since nobody is out at night so it should be a pretty slow and chill shift for you," He sighed as he grabbed his things.

I watched as my co-worker walked out of the store and into the winter snow as the sun was slowly starting to set down and darkness slowly began taking over the city.

Settling down on the stand, I placed in headphones listening to chill music to pass the time as I stared at the empty store, even though this was going to be boring as hell it was free money for me and I pretty much had the run of the store.

I did ring out a few late-night customers that I see every night buying beer and smokes along with snacks but other than that the streets are empty.

"That would be all tonight for you miss?" I asked politely and the customer nodded.

"Yes please," She replied as I rang up her items.

Just as I was about to finish up the transaction I heard the doorbell ringing, glancing to see who was entering, it was a woman wearing a black mask and a black winter coat wearing high heels with black stockings.

This made me raise an eyebrow as I had never seen the woman around here before, I thanked the lady for shopping there as I handed her the bag of her stuff, and I silently watched the strange woman as the lady walked out of the store.

I sighed leaning back on the chair as I quietly watched the woman browse the snack and beer section with a hint of curiosity but I kept it subtle so as not to create an awkward situation.

About maybe five minutes later, she grabbed some snacks along with the most expensive wine available which is a bit surprising as nobody has ever purchased it as long as I worked here.

"Hello, miss, will this be all tonight?" I asked in that same professional and polite tone.

The lady didn't reply but just nodded and I shrugged as I assumed she wasn't a talker, I ringed up her snacks but when I rang up the wine the POS locked me out requiring me to enter a date of birth.

"Can I see your ID real quick?" I asked politely and she seemed hesitant.

"Sorry miss, but if you don't show me your ID, I cannot sell you this," I informed her and she sighed as she pulled out her wallet before showing me her ID card.

Reading the date of birth the expiration date along with the authenticity, everything seemed to check out as she was above the age of 18 but the issue was her face as she was wearing the mask.

"Again, I'm sorry, but could pull down your mask? I need to see if the picture on your ID matches yours," I instructed and she seemed a bit irritated.

"Come on, I'm over 18, and I got places to be," She complained and I sighed as it seemed she was another difficult customer.

"I deeply apologize ma'am, but this is the law we're talking about here and I unfortunately don't make the rules here. Either show your face or you'll have to leave the wine behind," I explained to her and she huffed still refusing.

Just as I was about to take the wine off, I heard the doorbell ringing and another lavish woman walked in looking confused.

"Yah, Chewie, what's taking so long?" She asked her.

"Well, this idiot here thinks my ID isn't mine," The woman nicknamed Chewie answered and she sighed.

"Probably because we're wearing masks. Just do it, Chewie, before we're late, and besides, nobody else is here at this hour," the strange lady pointed out, and Chewie rolled her eyes.

Reluctantly, the woman pulled down her mask and picture on the ID, and her face checked out, allowing the transaction to finish up and me to not have to put up with her rich, snotty attitude.

"I'm sorry about that, sir. She doesn't get along with strangers well," the lady apologized on her behalf.

"No worries, it's part of the job," I assured and the lady sighed in relief seeing I wasn't too angry about the petty issue.

As they grabbed the bag of items, I watched them leave making me sigh in relief as I could get back to my other duties. I have dealt with many stupid customers in the past but this was a first, having some rich snot thinking they're above everyone else and the law.

I shrugged it off as I went to cook up some fresh hot dogs for the hot food stock along with pretzels stuffing the pre-made dough in the oven.

After I finished restocking the store, I wiped down the counter when I heard the doorbell ringing again and I looked up to see a couple of women wearing the same masks as the previous two did but their clothing was more casual this time instead of the lavish designer clothes.

Naturally, I kept my guard up and ready for their nonsensical rich crap as I wiped down the counter until the two women walked up to me holding a couple of cases of soju.

"Good evening, ladies, will this be all today?" I asked politely.

"Yup, that will be all, do you need to see our IDs?" One of them asked and I was a bit surprised.

"Uhm, yes, please," I answered they showed their IDs without a fuss and pulled down masks proving the pictures matched.

"Aight, your ladies check out," I informed them.

"By any chance, did our little friend Chewie give you any trouble tonight?" Haseul asked kindly and I raised an eyebrow.

"Who again?" I asked a bit confused.

"You know, the tall Taiwanese woman that just walked in here," Heejin chimed in and I chuckled.

"Eh, somewhat, nagging about pulling down her mask," I answered but also kept it professional and they giggled.

"Yeah, she's like that, that's why we don't often take her out much because she always causes trouble and we can't have news reporting scandals about her, can we?" Haseul mentioned as she inserted her credit card into the pin pad.

"What do you mean?" I asked and they seemed surprised by my question.

Haseul and Heejin looked at each other for a moment, somehow assuming that I might've heard about them like they were some sort of celebrities. Or perhaps they are and I live under a rock.

"N-Nevermind, how much do I owe?" Haseul asked giving a nervous smile and I told her the amount due.

Once the transaction was complete I handed over the receipt and they left without saying another word. I grabbed the cleaning cloth when I noticed Haseul had left her phone on my counter.

I grabbed the phone and rushed out of the store but by the time I got out, I watched them start their car and drive away and I sighed as I went back into the store seeing no point in chasing after them.

Getting back behind the counter trying to figure out what to do next, after thinking for some time I got an idea, I grabbed a paperclip in the drawer and bent it out to make a needle.

I take the phone out of its case carefully making sure I don't damage or scratch anything, I find the hole on the side and insert the needle popping out the SIM card slot.

"Bingo," I muttered holding the SIM card.

Seeing there were no customers around and the store was neat and tightly for now, I had plenty of spare time to kill as I took out my laptop plugged the SIM card into the slot, and used software to decode the information and find her phone number.

When I finished getting the necessary information, I managed to write down her number before sending her a text informing her that she had left her phone at my store.

I placed my phone down feeling rather odd at how she easily trusted me despite being a stranger to her, I guess she must be that busy and desperate to trust me that much.

Welp, there's nothing much more I can do about it unfortunately and I can only wait until my shift is over so I can turn her phone over.

Looking up the address on Google, it luckily wasn't too far away and within walking distance, but it's also impressive that they are located in the most expensive hotel in the city which shouldn't be all that surprising.

When I finally finished my shift, I made my way to the hotel but as I was walking I just wondered why Haseul didn't ask how I got her number in the first place. Strange now I think about it...

Whatever, the least I can do now is return her phone and get out of their hair for good, and it's not like they'll drag me into their hotel room and make me their pet, right? Some sort of delusional Christmas wish.

Anyway, I finally made my way through the hotel lobby after getting the number of their room, I hopped onto the elevator to the top floor, making my way through the corridor filled with pots of plants and statues.

Walking past the various rooms, I managed to find the right one, I took a breath before hitting the doorbell button.

"Who could that be?!" I heard a female voice ask loudly.

"I hope it's not a saesang! Let me check!"

Hearing footsteps coming upon the door, assuming the person was looking through the peephole, the door opened soon after.

"Can I help you?" A squirrel-looking Japanese woman asked and I held up Haseul's phone.

"I came to return Haseul's phone, I believe this belongs to her," I informed her handing over the phone to her.

"Oh, why thank you but how did you find it?" The woman asked cautiously.

"Haseul texted me to come here, I used the SIM card to track her number... I hope that doesn't sound too creepy, I didn't know what else to do," I explained nervously hoping that they don't call the cops on me.

The woman looked at me checking me out and making sure I wasn't some creepy stalker or hacker coming to steal her information or something.

Soon after, she called Haseul over and she came over soon after sighing in relief that I arrived before handing back her phone.

"Oh, thank you so much! You're a real lifesaver!" Haseul thanked me profusely.

"Yeah, it's no problem, Noona, Merry Christmas," I replied and was about to walk away.

"Hold it!"

I froze in place, slowly turning around to see what they wanted, my stomach hung in balance as I could only imagine the worst about to come.

"You really thought we'd let you leave without thanking you properly~?" Haseul asked with a warm smile and I raised an eyebrow.

"Uhh... What?" I asked.

"What she's saying is that we want you to stay for the party, if you're free of course," Nayeon chimed in and my eyes widened.

Well, I'll fucking be...

"Uh... yeah, I am," I confessed nervously and Nayeon came forward taking my arm and dragging me into their room almost seeming the ridiculous Christmas wish was coming true after all... At least most of it.

As Nayeon got me inside the room, the squirrel woman closed the door behind us, I was taken into the living room where I was astonished to see it was all girls.

"Oh, Haseul, is that Y/N? The one you kept talking about?" A Thomas-looking woman asked and Haseul nodded.

"Well, he is cute,"

"Is he staying for the party?"

"Ugh, why is he here?"

"Yah! Chewie, be nice to our guest for once!"

"Hmph!"

As the Japanese woman introduced herself, Sana seated me on the couch next to her, keeping her arm locked around mine. The girls just chuckled amusingly, seeing how clingy she was around me.

"Yah, miss flirt, you might give the guy a nosebleed if you keep holding him like that?" Jeongyeon pointed out at Sana pressing her boobs on my arm and she giggled only putting more pressure.

"So what if I do? I do enjoy pampering... Especially young men," She replied with a sultry tone as she caressed my chest making me gulp.

"Oh, God, Unnie, you always are a creep. You know that?" Tzuyu rolled her eyes, but Sana took no notice.

"Don't worry about them sweetheart, I have a surprise Christmas present waiting in the bedroom... If you know what I mean~," She giggled in a flirty way and I swore I felt my nose was about to bleed any second.

Soon after, the sassy idol Chaewon approached me, wrapping an arm around mine and forcing me away from her, but Sana brought me back.

"Yah! I saw him first!" Sana bickered.

"No! I won't let you corrupt him! Especially on the Holidays!" Chaewon replied as she continued tugging at me.

"Yah! Girls enough already!" JiU butted in breaking them and sighing in relief as I felt I was gonna get split into two.

"Look, girls, like Chaewon said, it's the Holiday season, and Christmas is around the corner. How about we all just enjoy each other's company while it lasts? We've all had a busy year, and we certainly don't need to add more problems right now, so how about we move on and enjoy ourselves?" Jihyo proposed, and the girls agreed.

"Does that mean I go home?" I asked raising my hand and the girls all shook their heads.

"No!" They all said in unison and I sighed.

When the party was done being set up for tonight, the girls went out shopping, of course, I was dragged along against my will with Gaeul, Handong, Sana, and Chaewon.

We all split into multiple groups, and I stayed with the four girls, who kept me in place and took me around the massive mall full of toy shops, gaming surplus, and much more as the girls shopped for clothes.

"First off, my dear, let's upgrade that Dinosaur of a phone," Handong pointed out.

"But it's the iPhone 4..." I mentioned and Gaeul facepalmed making me confused as this is the latest phone... At least that's what I thought.

"Pabo! Were you living under a rock? Come, let us show you the magic of modern technology," Chaewon said, taking my hand and leading me into the Apple store.

Looking around, I marveled at the accessories for Airpods, Beats, and iPads, and I was surprised to see the new iPhone lineup. I was living under a rock, being so busy with work and staying at my apartment most of the time.

One of the staff members approached, asking if they needed assistance. The girls asked the guy for the most expensive iPhone they had, and he took us over to the iPhone 16 Pro Max, which made my jaw drop as it was a whopping $1,599, the initial price for 1 TB.

Of course, being idols this was nothing to them as they paid for the new phone and soon set me up with the new model.

"Jeez, I know I returned your phone but this is quite a bit much," I commented checking out my new phone.

"No worries, dear, this will not even be close to denting our bank accounts compared to the rest of the shopping trip," Sana giggled.

"So best prepare yourself to be spoiled all day," Chaewon said, and I sighed as I was dragged along with them.

The entire day was spent just the girls buying shit for me like luxury brands like Gucci, Louis Vuitton, and even Lego sets that I've wanted. All of this would've made me broke but I guarantee none of these expenses wasn't even close to making dents to their accounts.

"Come on, Y/N, we still got more shops to look at! I gotta get Christmas gifts for my family!" Chaewon said in a demanding tone as she held my hand.

"Oh, yeah, that reminds me I need to find something for my siblings," Sana remembered as she looked around the stores.

"Same, I gotta find gifts for my parents," Handong mentioned.

"I also have to find a gift for my Oppa and parents," Gaeul chimed as she looked around the stores to see if there were gifts they might like.

Following the girls around various stores, it felt like forever as the girls searched the clothing stores and jewelry shops until they finally settled on the perfect presents.

"Ah, this is perfect! My Eomma is gonna love this!" Sana said in a satisfied manner as she inspected the custom butterfly necklace that was laced with diamonds.

"Wow, that is so pretty, Unnie!" Gaeul agreed.

Wrapping up the Christmas mall shopping, we all reunited holding multiple shopping bags but I saw Jihyo holding the most compared to me.

"You gonna lend a girl a hand~?" Jihyo playfully asked and I looked down seeing my hands were full as it is.

"Kidding, Y/N, I see you're hands look like they're about to fall off and I've handled more bags than this, especially when the girls go out shopping in many places around the world," Jihyo chuckled.

We walked to the two vans we took to drive here placing all the bags into the trunks before I joined Gaeul and the three girls in one of the vans.

"You look tired, my dear, you can lay your head on my shoulder or lap if you want~," Sana offered wrapping an arm around my waist.

"Yah! No, listen to that old hag! My body is more comfy!" Gaeul rebutted and they bickered making me groan as I leaned against the headrest enduring the noisy girls the entire ride.

Once we finally made it back to the hotel, we carried the shopping bags inside the room making sigh in relief as the bags were heavy as hell.

The girls were starving, of course, JiU, Haseul, and Jihyo agreed to order room service making lots of orders as the girls wrote down what they wanted.

"So what do you want, my dear, Y/N~?" Heejin asked handing over the paper and pen.

"Uhm, not sure if I want... Hehe," I politely declined and she pouted.

"Oh, come on, Y/N, it's on us and we did promise to spoil you~," Heejin insisted and I sighed as I couldn't resist that adorable pout.

Writing down what I wanted the girls chimed in money to pay for the food before making the order on the phone, Choerry and Liz sat next to me hugging me from both sides.

"So how do you think of the party so far~?" Choerry playfully asked.

"It's something... Though I never expected to be here for simply returning a phone," I nervously answered and they giggled.

"I know, kinda reminds you of one of those Wattpad fanfictions, huh?" Liz asked and I found it funny now I think about it.

"And would you know that, Liz?" Leeseo asked raising an eyebrow and Liz blushed almost sheepishly admitting she had been reading fan fiction.

"Oh, no worries, Liz! I think we all have read some of them at one point, I do find them interesting and some are quite ho-" SuA was about to say but Yves quickly covered her mouth.

"Hey! We have babies here!" Yves shushed her as she pointed at Leeseo and Eunchae.

"But I'm an adult now, right~?" Eunchae teasingly mentioned.

"Doesn't matter! You are still a baby!" Yves refuted and Eunchae pouted.

Just as I thought Liz and Choerry were enough, I found Yeojin sitting on my lap and curling up to me. She hugged me and nuzzled her face into my neck, which I found oddly cute.

"Yah! Yeojin! I want a turn!" Eunchae demanded but Yeojin stuck out her tongue in a mockery manner making the girls roll their eyes playfully watching the Maknaes fighting over my attention.

Well, my friends, I guess the lesson here is that you should expect the unexpected, especially during the Holiday season. Here I am, a background character being the main protagonist in this new world.

What do I expect next? I don't know, but I do know that I am not going anywhere with them all over me. Merry Christmas.

[luigisblueoveralls]

Honeymoon Bliss

Luigi x Fem!Reader

SFW and NSFW

Requested by @pixelybisexualwitch

Summary: After you and Luigi's wedding, you both take off to your honeymoon and spend the whole day together and have fun during the day as well as extra fun during the night.

Notes: Fluff and Smut. I will mark where the Smut starts in case anyone just wants to read the fluff. Of course, shy and fluffy and praising Luigi as always, but also very loving.

Requested by:

(H/C)=Hair Color

(S/T)=Skin Tone

(E/C)=Eye color

🌸=When SFW starts

🔥=When NSFW starts

💚

🌸

"You may now kiss the bride."

The whole crowd cheered as Luigi grabbed you, bowed you down, and gave you the biggest kiss he has ever given you. He held onto you tightly so he wouldn't drop you by accident. You wrapped your arms around his neck as he held you back up straight, absolutely on cloud nine. The two of you were so happy to finally tie the knot. Your family and friends were crying with tears of joy, especially Mario. He was so happy for his little brother to have someone to love. Throughout the wedding, the two of you played wedding games, ate some cake, and hung out with your friends and family, absolutely enjoying the day. But you both knew it was about to get even better. The honeymoon.

When Luigi asked where you wanted to go, you picked Colorado. Despite the heavy snow there, the mountains and views were beautiful. Luigi wanted to go wherever you wanted to go, and he was happy to go to Colorado for y'alls honeymoon. Since y'all wanted to have the whole first day in Colorado, you both waited till the day after the wedding to start the honeymoon.

"You ready, (Y/N)?" Luigi asked you both buckled the seatbelts in your seat.

The airplane was fixing to take off, and while you were excited, you were also nervous. Airplanes have always given you anxiety.

"Y-Yeah. I am Luigi." You told him in response.

As the airplane started to move, Luigi held your hand tightly. You held back as the plane went faster and faster and started lifting up. You held your breath as you could feel your stomach do flips, and your legs start to shake. All you could hear was the sound of the airplane engine souring loudly, as if it were mocking you. Make it stop, please.

"Hey." You heard the calm, soft voice of your now husband speak to you.

You shakingly turned to him. Luigi's blue eyes stared into your (E/C) colored eyes.

"I'm right here. We are on our way to Colorado right now. What are we going to do first when we get there?" Luigi asked you, trying to distract you away from the airplane take off.

"U-Um, we are going to go to our cabin on the mountain that we rented." You answered him.

Luigi held both of your hands and made you turn to your side fully to be facing him.

"A log cabin, actually. I may or may not have secretly made a few upgrades." Luigi winked at you, making you giggle.

"That sounds delightful." You said, blushing intensely, thinking about the day and night is gonna go.

"And then what?" Luigi asked, his blue eyes twinkling at you.

Ever since y'all got together five years ago, Luigi's eyes twinkled at you with so much love and care he had for you. You could stare into his eyes forever.

"Then we are going to go eat at a local pub, have some drinks and good food. And then maybe have some more fun later that night at the cabin." Luigi suggested, giving you a sly smile.

"Oh, really now?" You whispered, making you both giggle like school girls.

You felt more relaxed and relieved as the airplane was stable. You got back into reality as you realized you were with the love of your life, and you were gonna have the funnest week of your life in Colorado. After about five hours on the plane, the two of you finally arrived in Denver, Colorado. It was cold but you both were prepared.

"Brrrr, it's starting to snow!" Luigi exclaimed as the two of you quickly climbed into the taxi, shoving your luggage in it.

"You two new here?" The taxi driver asked both of you.

"Honeymoon! Newly married." You told the driver.

"Congratulations to you both then. I hope you both enjoy Colorado." The driver said to you both.

Luigi thanked the driver as you peered out the window. There was fresh snow starting to fall from the sky and onto the ground with the mountains already caked in snow. It was such a beautiful sight to you, and it was everything you have ever dreamed of. The two of you then arrived at the log cabin you were staying at. It was up on a hill, not a steep hill, thankfully, but the snow that was falling on the roof and on the grass and it made the view so much more beautiful. In the distance, on the back porch was a beautiful, open view of the mountains. And to top it all off, there were no close neighbors. The taxi stopped, and you and Luigi scrambled out of the taxi to get your luggage out. You paid the taxi driver as well as gave him a good tip, and he drove off. Although you wanted to admire the cabin some more from the outside, it was absolutely freezing, so the two of you power walked into the cabin.

"I'll go turn on the heater." Luigi announced as he searched for the cabins thermostat, which was in the kitchen.

The hot heat immediately filled the cabin, warming the two of you up.

"Ahh, that feels so good." You sighed, sitting on the couch.

"Oh yeah." Luigi said as he sat down next to you.

Of course, Luigi immediately held your hand and leaned his head onto your shoulder. You both were on cloud nine and felt so high for each other. Luigi was your husband, and you were his wife. It finally happened. You could feel your body start to get very warm and tingly on the inside. It felt so good to you. Oh yeah, you were ready. But was Luigi?

"Hey, uh, Lui?"

"Hm?"

"Can we uh, delay the pub dinner for tomorrow?" You asked Lui.

"Well, why's that?" Luigi asked.

"I think my entire body is sick, and *you're* the only cure for it." You told him in a sly tone, hoping he'd get it.

Judging by his pink face, Luigi got it.

"O-Oh, I see. Is someone feeling frisky?"

"Maybe." You answered, turning away from him in embarrassment.

This sort of thing wasn't new for the two of you. You both have had sex with each other plenty of times, the first time with Luigi being super shy as hell, but this time, it was different for sure. It would be y'all's first time as husband and wife. Luigi then grabbed your chin and made you look at him with a smile.

"Uh maybe I am too." Luigi awkwardly said.

It was his way of trying to be seductive. It was cute, and it worked on you. You glanced down at his crotch, answering your suspicions.

"Yeah, I can tell." You commented, still staring.

Out of a mix of both embarrassment and being flustered, Luigi covered his crotch up with his hands.

"Take me to the bedroom." You commanded him.

"Yes, ma'am." Luigi said as he got up, picked you up, held you gently and carried you to the bedroom.

🔥

Both of you entered the bedroom, and it was so big with a Queen sized bed, a big TV as well as a dimly lit lamp turned on. It set the mood for sure. Luigi then ever so carefully sat you down on the bed. He has always treated you so delicately like a feather.

"You're so pretty." Luigi said to you.

You blushed at his comment profusely. Even though you have heard these compliments so many times over the years, Luigi never fails to make you blush.

"You're such a cutie, Lui." You told him, pinching his cheek.

He giggled at you as he laid down on his back, looking up at the ceiling. You got a sly idea. You started taking your shirt off without moving positions, and Luigi remained still. You could feel Luigi looking at you as your shirt came fully off. You were wearing a bright green lacy revealing bra on, which was part of the surprise outfit you had planned for Lui. He was eyeing you but not fully staring. You decided that the best course of action was to get him out of the room for a second.

"Why don't you go get that bottle of white wine we brought with us?"

"Oh, uh yeah, yeah, sure thing." Luigi said, his face just caked in pink.

You know he saw the bra, and it was unlike anything you have ever worn for him. It took him by surprise and made him instantly aroused for you. As Luigi left, you quickly tore all of your clothes off, wanting to reveal the whole outfit to him. It barely covered your parts and skin and also came with stockings as well. It was y'alls honeymoon, anything can happen. As you could hear Luigi coming back to the room, you sat on the edge of the bed with your legs crossed and your hands propping your body up. Your entire body was in view for him. Luigi entered the room and nearly dropped the wine bottle and glasses he had in his hand when he saw you. 

"(Y-Y/N). You look so..stunning." Luigi stuttered out. 

His whole face was caked in red. Even his nose was bright red. The way your (S/T) skin blend in with the bright green lingerie you had made him so much more aroused than he already was. He could not keep his eyes off of you. 

"Thank you." You gestured Luigi to sit next to you, and he did. 

He poured both of you a glass of wine, setting the bottle aside. 

"To husband and wife." You start a toast. 

"To husband and wife." Luigi finished as you both clicked your glasses together and finished the glass of wine. 

The wine went down your throat smoothly. You didn't need the wine but you figured Luigi may need a little confidence juice. You both sat the glasses aside as Luigi turned to face you, holding your hips. He quietly gazed up and down at you, admiring your body.

"Forgive me, I know it's rude to stare but I can't help it." Luigi apologized to you.

"Sweetheart, there's no need to apologize. I'd be offended if you didn't stare." You drag your finger down his cheek and twirled the end of his mustache that you loved so much.

You gazed down and noticed Luigi's excitement poking through his shorts.

"Someone's excited." You comment, grazing your hand near his crotch making Luigi whine.

"Ah, how could I help but not be excited with you?" Luigi said, watching what you were going to do.

You backed away from Luigi and laid down on the bed, not breaking eye contact from him.

"I want you, Lui. Come show me a good time, husband." You told him.

"Y-Yes, ma'am." Luigi said, flustered than ever.

Luigi then took his shirt off. You admired his body. Luigi wasn't fat but also wasn't skin and bones either. He had some chest hair, but not too much and even some muscle in his arms from all of the plumbing work he has done over the years. He then took his shorts and boxers off, his hard dick popping out. He was a good five inches and very thick. From the other times y'all have done it, he was able to hit all the right nerves and spots inside of you due to that factor.

"God, you're so handsome." You comment, making Luigi smile.

"I think you're slightly better looking than me." Luigi said as he got on top, hovering over you.

He then leaned down and gave you a passionate kiss. You instantly kiss back, feeling his soft lips against yours. Luigi then began to massage your breast, making you moan into his mouth. You just want him inside of you so badly. You crave him now more than ever. You felt Luigi then grab your lacy underwear and pull it down your waist, then your legs and then off of your body. You could feel yourself become more and more wet from just Luigi touching you. His touch was like a drug to you, so addicting and you would get withdrawals if he didn't touch you. 

"Oh, Lui. I want you." You begged to him. 

If this was his first time, Luigi would've came right then and there from your words. But over the years, he has gotten better at being tolerant and lasting longer. 

"I want you too, (Y/N)." Luigi said as he positioned himself to enter you. 

"Are you ready, my love?" He asked for your consent. 

Even though you were more than ready, you always appreciated him asking for your consent. You nodded in response as Luigi pushed his dick inside of you, making you moan deeply. 

"Fuck." 

"Are you okay? Did I hurt you?" Luigi frantically asked you. 

The thought of hurting you made him so upset. That was the last thing he ever wanted to do to you. 

"You're fine, Luigi. Just felt so good." You reassured him, rubbing his back. 

"Okay good. I just want this to be fun for you." Luigi told you. 

"I know and you're already doing that." 

Luigi smiled at your comment. He felt reassured. Luigi then started thrusting in and out of you, softly and slowly. You wanted something more. 

"P-Pin me down, Lui." 

Luigi stopped and looked at you in shock. 

"Too much?" You asked. 

"N-No, (Y/N). I just didn't expect that out of you." Luigi admitted. 

"Well, it's our honeymoon. Anything can happen." You mentioned. 

"You're right." 

Luigi then grabbed your wrists, held them tightly but not harshly and pinned your hands above your head. The feeling of his nails into your wrists turned you on so much. 

"L-Like this?" He asked. 

You nod in response, feeling so much bliss and euphoria radiate throughout your body. Luigi then started thrusting in and out of you. Right away, Luigi was hitting all of the right nerves, making you tingle. You locked eye contact with Luigi, his bright blue eyes that were filled with so much love for you staring back into yours intensely. 

"You feel so good, Lui." You moaned, which made Luigi start thrusting faster and harder. 

He laid his forehead on yours, still maintaining eye contact. 

"Sh-Shit." Luigi groaned, "you feel so warm, (Y/N). Ah, ah!" 

Hearing the noises he was making made you moan louder. You could feel his nails dig into your skin out of pleasure but you didn't care at all. No, you just care about how good Luigi was making you feel right now. The entire room was filled with the two of y'alls noises you both were making. 

"O-Oh, (Y/N). You feel so good." 

"L-Luigi. Oh, ohh. Right there, please." 

Luigi started hitting in the direction that hit your good spot inside of you. You couldn't feel your legs any more, they were all tingly and numb from Luigi's thrusts. That orgasm was coming close for you and it felt so so good. 

"Please, Lui. Lui let me cum please." You beg him. 

"Ngh, ah, ahh. Hmhmm, hm." Luigi whimpered out. 

That tells you that he was coming close. When Luigi would come close, he could not get any words out other than your name. 

"I'm right there, Lui. I'm right there. O-Oh!" You cried out, feeling the edge of your orgasm creep out. 

Luigi was getting sloppy because he was right there, too, but he kept going for you. It was all worth it to him to hear your moans of pleasure because of him. 

"Oh, oh ohh Luigi! Oh Lui!" 

"Ohh, oh (Y-Y/N)!" 

The two of you screamed in unison as the both of you orgasmed hard at the same time, causing Luigi to collapse on top of you. You both laid in silence as both of you were catching your breaths and coming down from the high of your orgasms. 

🌸

"That was…amazing." You gasp out. 

"Yes. It was." Luigi agreed. 

He let go of your wrists and just wrapped his arms around you, to hold you, as he laid his head gently on your chest. 

"I love you, Luigi." You said as you run your fingers through his soft brown hair. 

"I love you too, (Y/N)." Luigi said back, totally smitten with you. 

"Want to freshen up in the shower?" You offered. 

Luigi jolted his head up in excitement. 

"Um yeah! Definitely." 

The two of you climbed off of each other and went to the master bathroom that was connected to the bedroom. The shower was huge, with a shower head on each side of the wall with a tile floor and wall as well as glass doors. As you started the water and waited for it to warm up, you could feel Luigi run his fingers slowly down your back and to the clip of your lacy bra. He unclipped your bra and slid your bra off of your body. 

"You're so beautiful." Luigi told you as he kissed your shoulder, his soft fingers running down your skin. 

It made you shiver but in a good way. He then wrapped his arms around you and started placing soft kisses on your neck. 

"Lui, you're just the cutest man ever." 

Luigi giggled, burying his face into your neck. 

"God. What would I do without you?" He laughed. 

Luigi could not imagine a life without you. He loved you that much. He wanted to have kids with you, grow old with you and he pray that at the point you both are super old that y'alls kids were grown and you both would die together in peace for he could never imagine a day without you. 

"What would I do without you?" You remarked back, making the both of you laugh. 

Once the water was hot enough, the two of you stepped into the shower. For the rest of the night, you two stayed in the shower together till the water got cold. Luigi took his time with washing you. He wanted to get every inch of your skin, and he did. And you did the same thing for him. Washing his mustache was the best part in your opinion. It was definitely a good post sex activity for both of you and a different type of intimacy for both of you. Once you both were done showering, y'all didn't even bother putting clothes back on. You both just both got back under the covers, holding each other close. You both could not wait for another day of spending time with each other as newlywedded husband and wife. 

💚

Here it is!! I'm so sorry it took so long! Like I said I work full time and can only write when I can but thank you all for your patience! I hope you enjoy this @pixelybisexualwitch !! I'll be working on the other requests as well and have them up as soon as I can.

[watashime-ciel]

more organized RH headcanons +picrews of their (human) designs !!

hello yes the title of this

there are headcanons i'd like to share but they're either too personal or too uh. idk what to call them but i would have to use a trigger warning a lot and i don't want that. i don't wanna include that here- (but just a note, if i ever post human DJ Yellow drawings, i am not putting a tw for his scars as they are healed. that's all)

this is VERY LONG so sit back and enjoy your stay

credits to the respective creators of he picrews! had fun using most of them (Cecil has elf ears because fuck you thats why)

DJ Yellow

or; Yotsuhe/Yellow, age 22

gay boygirlic (a boy who experiences feminity in a way that doesn't affects their gender identity; explanation i can give fron what i understood of the original definition), any/all pronouns (he doesn't cares at all)

he has freckles but only visible on the sun

surprisingly, can take headphones off. just don't ask him to do it, he might just ignore you. but it is now common to see him headphoneless

he lets his hair grow a lot and then refuses to cut it, but in reality he hates having long hair

the idea of being a famous DJ known all around the world like Skrillex or CHU² in RAISE A SUILEN doesn't makes him too happy. that's why he participates as a DJ in most of school events or in local parties. he prefers to be known for his VOCALOID songs/covers or his cosplaying or dancing, or even his MMD videos. being a DJ is more of a hobby for him so "why be known for it when i have something else that's my actual passion?"

sanest Hatsune Miku fan. buys all the cosplays he finds, the figurines, funko pops, dolls, wigs, posters, stickers, keychains, phonecharms, pins, decoration and plushies he finds. basically he is me when i see something Husk, Vox, TMNT or Wakfu related, but with Miku

Yellow knows a lot about VOCALOID and hates you forever if you mistake a VOCALOID with a SynthV etc. also hates you if you think vocal synthetizers are AI

Len Kagamine is like his second identity, as he learnt most dance moves from him, including the acrobatics. he now breakdances whenever he has the possibility. thanks Len Kagamine

Yellow needs glasses most of the time. the problem is that he loses them a lot so he's just. blind. too much roblox

he has three voices: his normal voice (voiceclaim: kokichi ouma english, kyo or yuu from zola project), his more childish or mocking voice (len kagamine soft, elmo or bluey. you read that right. elmo.) and his feminine voice for... uh. doesn't matter (marcille from dungeon meshi in latin spanish or amalia sheram sharm in french). the uses of the last two voices is unknown... for the public knowledge

silly picrew time:

Student

or; Katsumoto/Blue, age 21

bi male, he/shark pronouns, proud boygirlic protector

after years of dating, he was forced by Yellow to learn some dances for cosplay performances, even if he knows Blue suffers of social anxiety. it was enough for him to GO to a convention with Yellow. now imagine him cosplaying KAITO or Sebastian Michaelis and dancing Cendrillon. poor guy is exploding

number one germs hater. carries 70/30 alcohol+water everywhere, sanitary towels and tiny bags

don't leave him alone at home. he's the living Senshi but in blue. he's baking you 30 types of chocolate cake if you leave the house for 2 minutes

or, you can choose to leave him alone and surprise him singing, which he rarely does to the public. not even Yellow. but, what does he sing? something in spanish for sure, maybe El Cuarteto De Nos. or maybe he's choosing Atarashii Gakko? or maybe he's humming a Minecraft song. who knows

he enjoys drawing and animating, making really smooth animations

he has one voiceclaim for two situations: YOHIOloid for when he is singing, Hazu Kashibuchi for when he's talking normally

Blue has had his phase of long hair but soon enough asked for help to cut it out because the feeling was not letting him live normally. he wanted his "floor cleaner hair" (named like that by him) back

he is THE autism. and also a theathre kid. favourite musical is probably heathers or ride the cyclone

silly picrew time. do you prefer long haired Blue or bald

(needed an excuse to show the human djs kissing picrew)

J.J

or; JayJay/Jason/Leo/Leonardo/Jay, age 24

bi male, he/they/she pronouns, jokingly responds with "my pronouns are i/ta/ly"

HE IS POC and you cannot say otherwise

he smokes, but smells like roses

screams in italian when he is overly exaggerating with his reaction. it's the perfect source of laughter for Cecil

he can also play the bass, being a 'support' when Cecil practices songs on the guitar

he can also sing, but thanks to Cecil's demands of him singing like an agonizing racoon he rarely does. "agonizing racoon" comes from the fact that J.J has an Ado complex and uses a lot of screaming and growling in everything he sings. Cecil is worried about his vocal chords, even if J.J knows what he's doing

she was an emo before switching his life style to visual kei until the end of time. no one knows how his eyes look like without makeup

J.J still lives with his parents, actually. he has his own department but fuck that. he uses that department for music purposes (or he goes there to cry). but he wants his momma

you can't call him a visual kei nerd if he is the visual kei. has played with Cecil's cousin in the past and formed part of Megamasso for quite a long time until he gave up with Ryou's "bullshit" and left the band. Later forming what we know as the Rockers, or as i like to call it, the Rhythm Heaven Watashime Slug thing. but i'm stopping there because i have all things planned for the Rockers and this Watashime Slug thing leave me alone i'm normal (i'm not)

his room is very clean, and he has many figurines around the shelves and desk. there's one in particular that doesn't fit the "vibe", and it's a dinosaur plushie. it belonged to his younger brother who passed when J.J was 15 and his brother was around 12-15. everything that belonged to him was sent to charity or to the basement, except for that dinosaur

for his voice i never got creative. but back in the day, his voiceclaim was Kaito from Danganronpa. back in the day when Cecil was named JAVID.

silly picrew time, i promise i'll make more that look more... drawable or whatever

whatever you say jason leonardo from rhythm heaven headcanons

Cecil

or; Sou/Cez/Cece/Soushi/Cil-ly. age 23

pan nonbinary, he/they/ey pronouns

all his life he played the violin. it was at the age of 17 that he started playing the guitar with J.J

his mom is very much against the whole visual kei thing and him looking androgynous, but with time she has learnt to accept the differences™. as for Cecil's dad, he's a super chill adam sandler typa guy. adam sandler as in clothing. it was his dad who introduced him to the guitar world, with guitar hero lol

Cecil has a few voiceclaims for me but it's because i can't decide, only for his singing voice that's on my yt channel; fukase soft/normal. but for a spoken voice, i had Brandon from Team Hot Wheels in mind. but now i can't decide so bro won't talk. he shall sing

Cecil's very clumsy with his eyeliner so he always cries to J.J for help

he is Blue's best friend, and how they became friends is very funny actually. one time when J.J and Yellow were fighting, both Cecil and Blue decided to run away from the problem and hide somewhere until they were done. they were casually walking to the same place to hide. that's when Cecil decided to speak with "I suppose he talks crap about me to you too eh?...", to which Blue responds "...Yeah, but you don't look that terrible...". best friends forever the end

he is actually waiting for J.J to finally let go of his mother so they can go living on J.J department for music™, but that's not happening very time soon

Cecil cries very easily, actually. one time J.J was invited to play with his old band for a few concerts in another city and Cecil spent whole nights crying in call to J.J because he missed them. poor guy

he also enjoys animating, like Blue, but he has a more youtuber animation storytime type of style, more static and less movements depending of the situation. but he has a good hand with MMD

when him and J.J formed Watashime Slug, he spent hours not paying attention in class, writing the first song they recorded. half the school year lost, why ya askin

before singing in front of a lot of people he actually needs to kick or punch something while he hyperventilates. otherwise he id exploding

one of his vocal stims is quoting the life gives you lemons vine, with the voice crack and all

silly picrew time. CECIL ELF EARS JUMPSCARE and kissing rockers oh my god are they even real (they should be. i'm going insane)

Red Woman

or; Connie, age 22

sapphic girl, she/her pronouns, also a proud boygirlic protector

Yellow's best friend from faaaaaaar. they cosplay, sing and dance together whenever they got the opportunity. one might mistake them for a couple for how close they are, but nope yellow likes mem and connie likes wemen

she prefers to sing metal rather than rapping. mainly she does it because she wants to growl and scream like Lena Scissorhands, her idol. of course J.J then wants to do sing with her. she's also a soprano. how cool is she dude she's the whole package

her voiceclaim is Ruby and v4flower from Vocaloid. Ruby for english, v4flower for japanese. with both she can talk lol

she made black kusanagi nene canon y'all it wasn't me it was connie

she's in a relation with Jenna (blue woman), but many people think she's dating MC Adore due to them being close. she has two situations where she's mistake by someone's partner but no one knows about Jenna lol

silly picrew time look at her gooooo yayyyy

Blue Woman

or; Jenna/Jen. age 22

sapphic girl, she/they pronouns

i don't have much headcanons about her, but she's also a soprano and main choir singer for Connie

she has auditioned for some musicals but never got the role ever. her dream role is Jane Doe and Miss Argentina

her voiceclaim is CUL from v2 with a lower gender parameter setting. as for english and/or spoken voice, i'd probably say constance from rtc

she loves her gf. a lot. she has a lot of love to give

loves going out for walks, no matter what time is it

silly picrew AND KISS YAY it's the last kiss picrew i promise

Red Rapper

or; Kohai/Ko/Red/parappa. age 22

transgender man, unlabelled, he/him

he has a cousin-like bond with Connie, as their parents are super close and they grew up together. unlike Yellow Rapper and Jenna, that they're actual family. specifically siblings

also Yellow's best friend and one that stayed most of the time on his side during difficult situations until he met Blue

a rapping voice he might have besides his og voice, is TOPHAMHAT-KYO's from FAKE TYPE. as for talking, i'd say tankman? the one that appears in fnf because i forgot his name so now you know *which* tankman i'm talking about... at least after training his voice. and as for his singing voice, ARSLOID is a close choice for me, but not sure

he has dated Yellow Rapper in the past, but it's not like they felt romantic feelings towards each other all the time? it was more sort of platonic, so they stayed as friends. but remember something...

kissing the homies goodnight

his name was actually gonna be something among John or Noah, but when he came out to his parents and was asked what name he went by, his dad interrupted him and told the story that if he was amab, his name was gonna be Kohai, a japanese his dad fell in love with after living in Japan for years. cuz yeah, Red's american, not japanese. Red found it cool and decided that's gonna be his name. boom. lore.

silly picrew that's actually silly!?!?!?!?!!! please please check this picrew out it's super awoowoo /silly

none have the same vitiligo but they're close to the one i draw

yes he likes lemon demon

MC Adore

or; So'ra/So/Adieu/Amore. age 23

pan polyamorous female, she/her

her dream was to be a model, actually. but got an emotional attatchement to the imagination movers once, and thus made her insanely interested in music, evolutionating to rap music. then she built her persona, a serious but chill and fancy woman, collaborating with other rappers and artists around the Tengaku school (the biblically accurate rhythm heaven school where everyone with a bit of rhythm and coordination can study no matter how old they are. but that's for another day)

her singing voiceclaim is Merli and IA from vocaloid. for talking, back in the day ive chosen Agatha from O Surreal Mundo do Any Malu, but today i'd say Leslie Kritzer as Miss Argentina (or Delia) or Rosie from HH

as a joke she would smooch Connie until Jenna sees them and gets slightly angry, just to get a laugh. it's just kissing homies which is not gay btw🙀

many years ago, her and Yellow dated as they were the top famous at school, and big fanatics shipped them!? so they were like "...are we supposed to do somethkng about it or-". it was kind of forced, of course, and obviously they broke up because they actually didn't feel anything. textual words of Yellow: "thank God, i was just about to tell you i like men and boobs scare me"

mc adore picrew jumpscare

WITH THE FEVER UNIFORM🗣️🗣️🗣️💥‼️

Pitcher

or; Peach/Pitch/pinkie. age 19

transgender girl, bi with female preference, she/her

she has a crush on Reporter and hs been there for a long time now, but can't get Reporter's attention on that

she's extremely shy and insecure, but So'ra approached her once to share lunch and she became her friend. so if she feels in danger sometime, she just hides behind the first person that was nice to her: So'ra

she wants to be recognized for playing baseball but doesn't sees any progress on her. so she gets frustrated easily and would stop going to the practice to stay home and do it on her own time

she once got the role for a musical because Reporter signed her in, but she never played the role, as she felt she was going to faint. the reason reporter signed her in was her harmonious voice that could be perfect for Lydia Deetz, Sky the Scout or Heather McNamara. but she simply couldn't

voiceclaims for her include Kaai Yuki and Otomachi Una sugar for singing, two childish, girly and soft voices. for spoken voices, Himiko from Danganronpa and Luo Tianyi are my target options

Peach is super fluid in chinese, and doesn't gets the big chilling (bing xiling) meme at all. "what's so funny about ice cream?"

basic ahh picrews but it's better than nothing

Reporter

or; Debbie/Debs/Bee. age 19

unlabelled, strictly she/her pronouns

voice claim for singing is Megpoid GUMI Adult/AdultMellow. for talking, the pilot Charlie from HH or April O'Neil 2018

she's very bubbly and talkative. open to everyone and direct with her opinions even if they sound a little harsh

runs a fan blog about wrestling and otaku culture news, proclaming herself a celebrity

she enjoys dancing a lot, even if she's a bit clumsy

there's no way to make her shut up if you mention something related to sports or if she hears an incorrect fact about otaku culture

she bought most of Peach's outfits, helping her get more feminine and soft clothing that helped her feel better

has a little job working as a babysitter to most of the children living in the area, having a lot of tiny little friends wanting her attention and storytelling. she also teaches them english if they behave properly, so they have a little language their oarents don't understand that they can use when they play

president of the school newspaper. makes sure everything's perfect

you know what time it is. THAT'S RIGHT

Mako

age 16

questioning female, she/her pronouns

adoptive daughter of Annie and Mark, the two sciencists of Love Lab. there was a language barrier, as both sciencists were still learning japanese, but nothing beats the language of love... and Google translator

she met DJ Yellow when she was a child in the Tengaku's dance club, Yellow being a support teacher for kids that got frustrated easily, finding her pouting in a corner of the room. they developed a sibling-like relation, Yellow obviously being the older one, and to this day they call one another sister and brother

she always skipped class to go looking for her parents around school, as they were physics and chemistry teachers until something happened with Annie. maybe another story for another day but don't worry she's still alive

Mako loves dancing, singing and colouring. she's Tengaku's youngest 'idol', even if she didn't want to he one. but she finds it fun

voiceclaim for everything is otomachi una spicy/sugar !!

she's very fashionable, and loves uniform-like outfits

but she also loves sleeping, and spends most of the day in pajamas. she also makes sleepovers with her friends every once a month

her favourite animal are monkies and she's not sure why. she recalls a stuffed animal of a monkey back when she was waiting to get adopted, that she liked very much. she suspects it all started there

drum rolls YAYYY picrew time

isn't she the cutest don't you wanna pet her head because i do she's so skrunkly

AND WITH THIS we conclude the longest fucking post i've ever made. i'm missing out on Haruka and Akira (Girl and Boy from double date) but honestly i'm tired and for them i just include music. for example, Haruka plays the piano like PAREO from RAS and she can high kick when she catches the rhythm on metal and rock. or Akira is good at freestyling. very basic shit

these are the bases of whatever headcanons i make of them, specially the rockers and djs. remember that if you don't like a headcanon, do NOT hate. instead keep the commet to yourself or comment your view in a respectful way🫶🏽 because none of these hurt you, although i get it if it somehow makes you uncomfortable to see a headcanon be different from your own, because it happens to me very very often. but let"s respect everyone's imagination and enjoy the community instead !

i hope yall liked these mfs

cya

[fics4you]

I love Psych. I just finished rewatching the entire show. Maybe you could do something where Juliet and Gus for whatever reason are absent, so Lassiter has to deal with a sick Shawn while working a case.

You can choose type of sickness and whatnot, although I'd let ke some snz

Sickie: Shawn

Caretaker: Lassie

(Because Psych is in fact a crime show, there is some mention of blood, death, crime, ect. I also think I should get some credit for coming up with the whole plot of this fic)

Also a warning for a few mentions of nausea

Shawn loved to cause chaos, that was a well known fact. Everybody knew that, especially his coworkers, so it came as a surprise when he had been unnaturally quiet. Gus questioned him about it while they were driving home. Shawn shrugged, "I'm just tired today" Gus raised a skeptical eyebrow. "Don't forget I have to go to my real job tomorrow." Gus said, Shawn didn't respond, Gus glanced over at his friend and saw his eyes were glossed over, "hhh- EkTchu hh-KtCHu hh-eh- ktchu"

"bless you" Gus said, Shawn shook his head and cleared his throat. "thanks. What were you saying?" Gus knew Shawn was trying to distract him, but didn't want to embarrass him. "I have my real job tomorrow" Shawn groaned, "and Jules has the day off tomorrow so I'll be stuck with Lassie." Shawn sounded more upset about that than he should have, he usually loved torturing the head detective, so Gus was concerned.

Gus was snapped out of his thoughts when Shawn sneezed loudly, Gus glanced over at his friend, he didn't bother blessing his friend yet, waiting until the next two sneezes came. "Hh- kTchU ehh-KTChU"

"bless you. You alright man?" Gus asked, feeling concerned about his best friend. "Yeah I'm good" Shawn said, he cleared his throat right after. "You don't sound too good. You feeling ok?" Gus asked, concern for his friend rising, "im fine" Shawn said, a note of finality is his tone, Gus rolled his eyes, know how stubborn his friend could be, "am I dropping you off back at your house?"

"yes" Shawn said, "ok" Gus drove his friend back home, "I'll see you after I get off work tomorrow, be careful, stay safe. Don't go to work if you still feel sick tomorrow"

"i-"

"Shawn I've known you forever, I know you're sick. You can't lie to me." Shawn was embarrassed but didn't grace his friend with a response, "get some rest. Let me know how you feel tomorrow" Shawn nodded.

The next morning when Shawn woke up he knew he was anything but fine. He knew he was 100% sick, but being his typical stubborn self, he got out of bed and got dressed, noticing only as he left his shirt was on backwards. He fixed it as he left, chosing to ignore that he hadn't eaten anything yet.

When he arrived at the station he could barely breathe through his nose and his throat was dry and scratchy. He got inside and nearly ran into Lassie, "watch it Spencer." Lassie said, his tone crisp and sharp, "sorry" Shawn said, Lassie was thrown off by Shawn apologizing. "What do we have today?" Shawn asked, Lassie noticed Shawn's voice sounded, but didn't question it. "We have a case, a teenager was found dead in a locker at the local highschool, he was a popular kid that was well liked and a good kid, good grades, loved by everyone, good family, lots of friends-"

"hehh-KtchHu hh-KtcHUh hh-KtcHUh!"

"he was captain of the football team-"

"wow, no bless you?" Shawn said in a mocking exasperated voice, Lassie rolled eyes, and ignored the psychic detective. "An all around good kid, we will be heading to the school" Lassie rolled his eyes, "I can't believe I got stuck with you" Shawn ignored Lassie, "let's go" Shawn said, not really wanting to engage in talking, he didn't feel well, he was tired, he was missing having Gus, he just wanted to get home.

Lassie thought that Shawn was acting weird but didn't really feel like dealing with it. The two headed to Lassie's car, Shawn stopped for a second to duck into the bathroom to get tissues, he was grateful that Lassie didn't notice as he didn't feel like explaining.

The two arrived at the school, and Shawn found himself fighting a gag as they went inside, the school smelled disgusting, which made sense with the whole dead body. Shawn swallowed down bile, "how long was he dead before they found him?"

"I'm not sure. We'll find that out." Lassie glanced over at the psychic, "you alright Spencer?" Shawn looked miserable, "yeah, let's get to it" Shawn said, quickly pushing past the head detective. The closer they got to the crime scene the worse the smell got. Sean thought he was going to actually throw up. Once they arrived a teenage girl ran up to the two of them, years streaming down her face. "Please help! My boyfriend, he's dead" she dropped to the ground sobbing. Lassie cast a disgusted look at the disgruntled teenage girl, "can we get her out of here?" Lassie asked, "no, keep her" Shawn said, despite being sick, his instincts weren't totally gone, and he wanted to question the girl. Lassie glared at Shawn, Shawn stepped closer to the crime scene tape, the girl followed at his heels, Lassie came behind them, they went over to the boy, "when was he found?" An adult, whom Shawn suspected to be a teacher, was standing nearby, "this young lady found him, it's his girlfriend so she had his locker combination, and people were commenting on the smell so she said that she would check it. This was this morning."

"when did the smell start?" Lassie asked taking his pen out.

"it was noticeable for the first time today" The girl said. "Did- hh- hetTcHu ehh-KTChU hkTCHu-

"bless you"

"thank you, did anyone else have his locker combo?"

"no" the girl said, despite her emotion, she had a note of pride in her voice, "just me. Because he loves me"

"ok, can my partner and I have a moment to di-hh-ihsc- ukTcHu ehhkTCHu ehh-ktchu- snf- my partner and I need a moment to discuss" Shawn said, the teacher took the girl and they left the area, "csn you pull yourself together Spencer? What is wrong with you?" Lassie said, his voice sharp, "hey, despite everything I have a lead" Lassie tried to not look impressed, "explain."

"think about it, the body started smelling today, but there's no way that a body that decayed only started smelling today, which me-hh-hetChu- EkTchu hh-KtCHu- means that the body was put in there last night, and this about what the girl said, she's the only one that knew his code. I bet if he looked at the se-eh- snf- security tapes it would show her." Shawn's voice trailed off at the end, and he brought his elbow up to his face, "hh-KtCHu- hehh-KtchHu hh-KtcHUh ehh-tTchU hktChU ehh-KTChU"

"bless you" Lassie said, trying not to show he was actually someone concerned about Shawn. "Sorry" Shawn said, he coughed into his elbow, "Shawn... Are you sick?"

"maybe a little" Lassie rolled his eyes, "why did you come in today?"

"I get bored. And Gus had to work today. And look, I figured it out, so I'm not useless."

"it's not about how useless or useful you are, it's about the fact that you're sick you idiot." Shawn was confused, he didn't understand why Lassie even cared, "anyways, let's look at those security cameras," Shawn said, he started walking away, "do you even know where you're going?"

"Nope!" Shawn said, he began wandering around aimlessly. Lassie rolled his eyes, but somehow still ended up following Shawn. They ended up at an office door labeled principal "how-?"

"psychic" Shawn said simply, when in reality it was just a very lucky guess. Lassie knocked on the closed door, a woman opened it, "hello, we are with the Santa Barbara police department. We are investigating the death of Liam Jones. We're here to watch some security cameras"

"oh thank you for coming. My secretary said she had met you, yes, come in."

"can we see the tapes from last night?"

"last night? The principal looked confused, "but he couldn't have smelled that and after only a few hours?... Right?" The principal said softly, but she pulled the tapes up from the night before, and sure enough at around 1 AM a window opened and the girl came in, dragging a large bag with her. The principal gasped, she fell backwards into the chair, "that's Meghan! His girlfriend! What... Let me get her in here"

"not yet, let's finish watching them first." The principal was shaking, but that wasn't what worried Lassie, as Shawn was shaking almost as much as the principal was, the detective was holding his leather jacket closed with one hand, the other one was held against his nose, but his eyes were focused on the screen. Lassie wouldn't admit it out loud, but he was impressed by the dedication of the psychic.

Shawn's eyes never left the screen he wanted to make sure he didn't miss anything. He needed to sneeze so bad, but even blinking could be detrimental to the case. So he kept his hand beneath his nose and his eyes on the screen. They watched as the petite girl displayed concerning strength as she shoved the corpse into the locker, Shawn was somewhat impressed at her strengths but he also knew that adrenaline is one heck of a drug. She had a crazed look in her eyes that Shawn recognized as obsession, "let's bring her in" Lassie said as the tape fizzled out as she climbed back out the same window. Shawn was grateful for the distraction, he pulled a tissue out of his pocket, "hh-KtCHu- ehh-ktchu hhktchu"

"bless you" Lassie said, Shawn waved him off with one hand, while his other hand held a tissue as he tended to his nose. The principal paged the young girl to the office, and the second she walked in the door Shawn noticed that the smell of rotted flesh followed her, and he noticed bruises on her hands that could have come from the ropes of the bag, the girl had a sickly look on her face, Shawn guessed the weight of what she'd done was starting to set in. Lassie sent the principal out and then turned to the girl, "Come take a seat" Lassie said, the girl sat on the chair, "Miss Megan I have a few questions for you"

"yes?"

"why were you dragging your boyfriend's corpse into the school last night?" Her eyes widened and she burst into tears, "It's not my fault! I had to find somewhere to put him and I thought that no one would notice."

"Why-"

"I didn't even notice the smell, I guess I was used to it."

"how long ago-"

"he's been dead for a few weeks. But everyone thought he was at a college for a competition, because I posed as his mom and sent an email to the teacher"

"Megan, why did you kill him?"

"he- i- it was an accident I promise." The girl said, not even bothering to deny it. "I found out that he was going to break up with me, so I had seen something in a TV show that said that a girl drugged her boyfriend so he would become addicted to her" she sobbed "but I didn't know they meant drugs like nicotine, so I put an entire bottle of crushed up Tylenol in his coffee. And not only did it make him super sick, but apparently he was also allergic so his throat closed up and he couldn't throw up" she sobbed, Shawn and Lassie exchanged a glance "why didn't you tell anyone?"

"I didn't think anyone would find out it was me, I didn't mean to kill him. It was an accident." Shawn was thrown off, how stupid was this girl, that was bold coming from the guy who was at a crime scene with what could potentially be the flu. "Miss Megan Ross, you are unfortunately under arrest for the murder of Liam Jones" the girl started crying, "please stand up" Lassie said, the girl stood, she was sobbing uncontrollably, she didn't even try and fight them, "Come along" Lassie called the station for Chief to send a car to take the girl back to the station while they finished the legal documents. They also contacted the morgue and the girl's parents to meet them at the station.

Once things slowed down a bit and Shawn and Lassie were the only ones left, Lassie turned to the psychic, "do you want me to take you home before we do the paperwork?" Shawn was thrown off by the head detective's kindness, "no I'm okay" Shawn said, his voice had reached the point where it was so scratchy and so congested that he was nearly impossible to understand. "You sound horrible Spencer, "gee thanks Lassie" the detective rolled his eyes, "you know what I mean Shawn." Shawn was thrown off by the use of his real name, "I'm taking you home. You're sick as a dog"

"I'm f- hekTchuh heh-KTchU- ehh-ktchu fine"

"like hell you are Spencer we're leaving. You're going home and that's not a suggestion that's an order."

"technically I don't work for you so technically you can't order me to do anything"

"Spencer I will shoot you with a taser if I have to."

"that goes against protocol" Lassie rolled his eyes, "is it really so hard for you to accept that you're sick?"

"yes. I don't like to be fussed over. It's the only time I don't want or like attention" Shawn admitted, surprising both himself and Lassie, "well if you'd just go home you can be miserable in the comfort of your own home. And we won't bother you"

"fine" Shawn said, mostly because that sounded really nice and all he wanted was to be in his own bed in the comfort of his own home. Lassie and Shawn went out to the trooper, "honestly, I'm impressed how you not only solved that case so fast, but also while sick" Lassie admitted as they drove, "I had good motivation "

"which was?"

"I wanted to go home"

"fair enough." Lassie stopped in front of Shawn's home, "oh and Spencer, next time you're sick. Just don't come in"

"yes sir"

[protect-daniel-james]

I have been writing! There is so much inspiration out there, and my life has been - surprisingly? - going so well lately! I just want to finish some fics before I go on holiday (Netherlands and Belgium) in two weeks.

So, what's in store? Please note that the names are not the real names, they are the names of the files I write the fics in (yes, I am no longer writing directly in drafts of AO3, it was a bit too brave and backfired a couple of times)

Daddy A in the army - this one is taking forever because it is....tough. I got the Zinky Boys book from my local library, and I will probably have to go through that for some more inspiration

His uncle was more pragmatic. “God helps those who help themselves," he said when Roman Arkadyevich brought up the topic of young men returning from their two-year service with wives, kids, apartments, and a bumaga entitling them to vacation in Bulgaria.  With that in mind, Roman Arkadyevich bought the three lucky packets of cigarettes; ready to meet Lady Luck halfway. Naturally, his packets of cigarettes were confiscated on the first day.

Pippo's wedding - this should be a short lemon-y smut because we all know the Inzaghis and we know what they are.

It’s not even ten in the morning and Simone is on his second glass of wine - it’s not a big deal, everyone around the house has already had something, right after their morning coffees, toasting to the groom’s health and happiness, but Simone stayed sober throughout the season, pedantic and precise as ever, wanting to always keep his mind clear throughout the season. Now even the small amount of alcohol, combined with the heavy humid air before the rain that was forecasted for the day, made his head swim.

Numa numa iei - because what's not to love about random EURO pairing

“Nikoushek.” Now he’s mocking him. Nikoushek is a specific memory that not everyone knew about. “Nikoushku,” he corrects him, burying his fingers in the dark roots of his hair. He wishes Adrian kept it longer, all over his head, and didn’t shave the area around his ears and nape. “You use the vocative case when addressing someone.” “Vocative case, what is that. Nikoushku,” Adrian repeats, and his eyes shine brighter than before. “I can’t even speak Romanian properly,” he jokes, before laying his head down on his captain’s bare chest. He can’t resist, and places a quick peck on the skin. He likes the contrast between the bare, hairless chest and the arms covered in tattoos of significant memories from Nicolae’s eventful life. The arms are for the world to see, to learn Nico’s birth date, see the image of his grandmother, admire the colors of the flag, read the names of his children, and get to know the sources of his motivation, Biblical, fictional, inspirational – but the chest is only for him to see.

Juicy - finally putting on "paper" the food kink Ange/Poch fic that celebrates juiciness in all forms, good food, loving good food, loving yourself, and all the good summer Greek-Aussie-and-Argentine stereotypes together.

Juicy. He couldn’t think of a better word. There was so much under his skin - so much to touch and knead and hold onto and rub - and the excess of everything about Ange, his body, his hair, his deep voice, the smile that usually played in the corner of his lip, it all filled Mauricio’s head with a soothing sense that everything will be alright.

Lentemente - it is called this because of the Django Reinhardt song Lentemente mademoiselle, no idea *why* though. It's the Unai x Andoni bookstore!librarian!AU, it's fun and sweet and soft and pointless

“I’m sorry – I noticed you have been standing here with this specific book – “ He quickly glanced at the book’s cover, just to quench his private and nosy curiosity over the book that seemed to have captured the customer’s full attention. It looked like one of those cheap paperbacks dedicated to sensationalistic retelling of history, politics, or anything else – but the cover was nicely done in a clean, aesthetically pleasing way, showing a traditional house façade. Que disent les maisons basques? He had to smile; it didn’t seem like the most thrilling read. “ – and there is a line outside,” he finished his sentence, trying not to seem too judgemental of the book of choice. He made some calculations in his head already – he’d never seen anyone even just remotely interested in buying this book, and he certainly never sold a single copy of it. It was one of those volumes that was always there during the physical inventory and yet Andoni wanted to keep it – if nothing else, it had a nice cover and looked professionally made, which wasn’t the case for some of the faster-selling ones. It was a French-language book, which added a sense of internationalism – and it concerned a local theme, the traditional inscriptions on the lintels of rural houses. It was exactly the kind of book he liked to keep in the shop, even if it wasn’t selling well – it added a sense of rootedness to the place.

[delta-lethonomia]

WIP WEDNESDAY

lil kinktober thing that may or may not get finished, so why not post a big ol' chunk of it (and yes, it's wrong reasons-verse)

Wyll snorted. He still looked entirely too sober for her liking, but then again, someone had to be. But it pleased her nonetheless, because after some idle conversation and another drink, his anxiety seemed to fade, his head held a little straighter, and he looked more like the youthful young man she knew him to be. He was in the process of telling a rather impressively off-color joke about a Minotaur he’d slain when she felt it—two hands, sliding around her waist, Astarion’s cold breath against her exposed neck. “Darling, don’t ever leave me with Karlach again. There’s something very, very wrong with her!” “Rude,” Tav replied, her mouth curled into an unstoppable smile as Wyll averted his eyes. “What’s the problem?” “What isn’t the problem?” He moaned against her hair. He’d pressed his face against her head as much as he could, his weight slumped against her back in a way that was starting to make her neck ache. “She has awful taste and a stupendous tolerance. I’ve never drunk so much cheap, awful firebrandy in my life. She must be burning it off somehow—otherwise, we’re going to have a very dead Karlach, soon, for which I am absolutely not responsible!” And as if on cue, Karlach mad laughter rang out, higher in pitch and cackling, more akin to a gnoll’s than her normal pleasant rumble. Wyll’s head perked up at the sound: he stood, and excused himself far too quickly to be polite, and Astarion snagged his empty seat in a move that seemed far too smooth to be anything but planned. “Finally,” he sighed, and sipped what looked like a completely full glass of wine. “She’s tolerable in small doses, but no one should be that excited to go to the blushing mermaid of all places. She has too much cheer—I’ll break out in hives if I have to listen to any more of it.” The dim lighting of the mermaid suited him, she thought, watching the way the warm orange glow and deep shadows played across his face, the way he gestured with his glass, his forearms and a large swath of his chest exposed. He’d folded his legs, one slim leg tucked over the other, mimicking her pose as he leaned against the bar, his spine straight as he eyed her. “You’ve been having fun.” She smiled. Her chest felt warm, the commotion of the busy tavern fading away to nothingness, for Astarion consumed her attention with every move he made. “I like the mermaid,” she replied, amused by judgement clouding his expression. “Good people, cheap drinks, and there may even be music later. What’s not to like?” “Cheap drinks of godsawful swill, you mean,” Astarion complained, but sipped his glass nonetheless. “I’ve been thinking about something a little more… top shelf. Exclusive, as it were. Something full-bodied and red, darling, if you happen to catch my drift.” And then he frowned, reconsidering. “Drift? No. No, I’m not going for a nautical theme—pretend I said anything else—” and she laughed, even though it wasn’t particularly funny, forever pleased by how he preened whenever he made her smile or laugh, their legs pressed together in a companionable way. He made fun of her substandard ale; she mocked him for allowing himself to be bullied into taking shots with the local youth, namely Karlach.

[kylesvariouslistsandstuff]

Little Things I Dig About 'Puss In Boots: The Last Wish'

This will be an unorganized collection of thoughts, but... Here we go!

Do not read on if you have yet to see PUSS IN BOOTS: THE LAST WISH. Spoilers *ahoy*!

The opening title card alone. A friend pointed this out to me, the whole "This story... Is a Fairy Tale..." graphic. This is **such** a 180 from the other SHREK movies, especially the first SHREK, which opens with a Walt Disney-style book opening, laying down some exposition, and then Shrek himself ripping out a page, wiping his bum with it... That shows just what kind of attitude one movie has towards fairy tales, and what attitude the other one has. It's like this franchise has matured from its early class clown days.

The sword-fighting in the opening action scene is seemingly in sync with 'Fearless Hero', just great timing and animated choreography there.

"Never been touched!"

Puss' battle with the giant gives me major SHADOW OF THE COLOSSUS vibes. He makes that whole ordeal look like nothing, and this was *after* he took on a governor and his soldiers.

The very subtle midnight-to-dawn transition as the giant fight unfolds. For whatever reason, it makes the coffee bit even more clever to me.

The shot of Puss running down the rope holding the bell, in mid-air? A companion piece to "What's Up Danger?" from SPIDER-MAN: INTO THE SPIDER-VERSE. Also the shot of him 360-ing in the air before skewering the giant with his sword... That, too.

Death being visible in the background during the fight has already been pointed out ad naseum, but I want to point out something else... Something that was actually bugging me, until I thought of an explanation... Okay, so... The bell that crushes Puss. The wider end is hanging above Puss, yet when the bell falls? It fell sideways, despite hanging straight down. You know, the open end of the bell was facing downward. If it had detached from the rope and fell on Puss, he could've survived if the ringer didn't hit him... And that position of the bell is visible in the shots of the defeated giant... But since Death was there... Did Death magically make the bell fall that way? It's established that Death is fed up with Puss for not only mocking him, but also not valuing the other lives he lost. So maybe he magically made that bell fall in a way that it could crush Puss? Just to get it over with and not have to wait any longer for that cat to put himself in another potentially deadly situation? Thus leading him to his last life and Death's incentive to finish off Puss once and for all? Maybe?? Or am I nitpicking or looking too into this?

The continuity nods to not only the SHREK sequels, but also PUSS IN BOOTS Uno. The flashbacks Puss has when he encounters Death for the first time seem to imply that the events of PUSS IN BOOTS took place "after" SHREK 2, maybe even SHREK THE THIRD and SHREK FOREVER AFTER... Despite the implication that it was a prequel? I rewatched PUSS IN BOOTS a few weeks ago, and even that movie - sans the flashbacks/Humpty backstory - is rather vague on when it is set. Puss never mentions Shrek, Donkey, etc.... But weirdly, it could possibly take place after SHREK 2 at the very least?

Speaking of the first PUSS IN BOOTS... I'm now willing to know what the geography is of the SHREKverse. Where Shrek's swamp is, Far Far Away, San Ricardo from PUSS IN BOOTS, Del Mar from this movie's opening scene... Like where is everything in relation to one another? Are DreamWorks gonna make some sort of SHREK lexicon or map of the world that tells us more about this stuff?

A nice sense of pace when Puss stays at Mama Luna's place. We even get a passage of time there, which isn't so common in a lot of modern animated movies whose whole storylines seem to be over in 2-3 days.

Papa Bear singing a random ditty while interrogating Mama Luna with her own piano.

The town where Big Jack Horner's factory is: A very grimy and industrial-looking place for a SHREK series locale. It's fascinating even if we see very little of it. Seems like a crumby place to live.

Big Jack Horner's "Wanted" poster... The hell is THAT face?

Ya know, about the "Wanted" posters... I like that the film, despite leaning harder into fairy tales/fantasy than the first PUSS IN BOOTS, retains that Wild West/old-school adventure movie vibe from the first one with the Wanted posters and some of the score. "Fearless Hero" in particular. Like, this is still firmly in Puss' Wild West/Three Musketeers/Zorro/etc. roots.

Horner's quick snaps: "TAKE IT TO THE TROPHY ROOM!" "MAKE WITH THE BOX!" He's probably the most neurotypical character in this thing.

The Serpent Sisters are a lot of fun, especially the not-so-bright-one. Would've liked to have seen more of these two... Oh well, maybe in a prequel/spin-off short. They really reminded me of the twins from HOW TO TRAIN YOUR DRAGON. Hey, maybe DreamWorks could make a Goldilocks/3 Bears prequel where they had run-ins with these sisters.

One of Kitty Softpaw's attack moves is literally grabbing enemies by the insides out their mouths, like she's a dentist or something, and hurling them like they're frisbees. Humans twice her size, even! Her and Puss would've eviscerated Thanos.

Death's sudden appearances throughout the film... He's like the pterodactyl from JOUST, or Bendy from BENDY AND THE INK MACHINE. There is no beating him, and he'll just randomly appear... It's handled so effectively each time out.

Their take on the "cute eyes" scene. With the pushed art style and new approach to the animation, they really, REALLY push this gag for both Puss and Kitty, and even for Perrito when he finally masters the cute eyes.

Everything about the dark forest, really. In my Letterboxd review, I noted how this film was unique to the other SHREK films and the first PUSS IN BOOTS movie, in that it really just took on this very dreamy and airy feel. Something about it felt so ethereal in a way. Again, going back to the title card... It truly felt like a fantasy world, a fairy tale. This, to me, is evident in the scenes of Goldilocks being entranced by the Nostalgic Pines and Puss' confession to Kitty Softpaws when they're climbing a tall tree. Just all the shot compositions and color work and score, it's perfection. This is still a funny and farcical upside-down fairy tale world, but it's markedly different from the other SHREKs because of this.

Much has been written and said about the panic attack scene already, but what I particularly liked was how Puss runs through the woods for a bit, imagining the trees as Death looming. It is very reminiscent of the scene in SNOW WHITE AND THE SEVEN DWARFS when Snow White, upon learning her stepmother wants her dead, runs through the forest and imagines all of the trees as gnarly monsters. Much like the scene in SNOW WHITE, PUSS IN BOOTS 2 doesn't lighten it with comedy or a gag. It is played straight, and Perrito coming to the rescue is not dissimilar to how the forest critters came to comfort a crying, frightened Snow White. Again, a night-and-day difference from how the other SHREK movies covered fairy tales. (And especially how the SHREKs “satirized” Disney's takes on those stories.)

The little song that Goldi, Baby Bear, and Papa Bear break into when approaching the illusion of their old home, dancing in a circle. It's like a nice little moment that those characters have together, establishing their connection and their little family quirks and such. It only lasts like a few seconds, but it's such a charming little moment.

The library card in the book of fairy tales Goldi used to read.

Nice callback to the dance-off from the first PUSS IN BOOTS when escaping Goldi and the bears.

"Oi like the cut of 'is jib!"

Is that an ACE ATTORNEY reference in a SHREK movie?

Such ace economy and pacing in the climactic final battle, with every section carefully thought out and so much being paid off, all the little details. It's just right. Three tones handled down pat, with seamless transitioning between the three: Kinetic action for everyone fighting, intense/scary when Death shows up, and then thrilling and heroic when "Team Friendship" defeat Jack Horner.

I'm sure I'm forgetting a few details, which I'll put on here when they come to me, haha... But yeah, I loved PUSS IN BOOTS: THE LAST WISH.

[berryflops]

" not my job anymore " | jeremiah fisher

synopsis: jeremiah forgets that saving y/n isn't technically his job anymore.

warnings: angst x100, swearing, mentions of underage drinking, injuries, a bit of fluff, jealousy if you squint, gore descriptions, car accident, death, crying | word count: 1,846

PRESENT ( jeremiah's pov )

I'd picked up my skateboard and put in my earbuds, ready to cruise down the empty Cousins streets.

No one had much of a reason to be in a summer town during the winter. A few locals were walking around, but there was practically no one else there. Everything was mine.

I'd arrived at the house a day earlier. I didn't want to stay long. I just needed an escape, a place to think. After everything with mom, I wanted, needed, time to myself. It made me selfish, I knew, but everyone needs an escape.

Cousins would forever be mine. Although I used to have a different one.

I pushed off, the wheels of the board, rolling off the gravel road. Every turn I started thinking about things I didn't need to, things I should have long forgotten. Things that involved my Sunflower, my Sunflower that was no longer mine.

PAST ( y/n's pov, 7 months earlier )

"Jere!" You giggled, chasing after your friend. You ran around the counters and into the back, following the blond all the way into the storage room.

Jeremiah turned back at you and shook his head, laughing and sticking out his tongue. You shook your head in mock anger and jumped on him, hitting the ground with a thud.

You both burst into giggles, rolling around on the ground and bursting into bright pieces of joy at random moments. Your laughter was choppy and so was his, wheezes making their way into your voices.

"We're gonna get in trouble if we don't get up, Sunflower." Jeremiah gasped, turning to face you on the ground. You looked at him, laying on your side. His ocean blue eyes were alight, like they always were around you. Your stomach had fluttered at the nickname.

"Since when does Jeremiah fucking Fisher care about getting in trouble," you teased, bopping his nose and grinning when he swatted your hand away.

When he stood up and held a hand out a sudden thought struck you. Jeremiah was going to Cousins soon. He'd have his new job, his old friends, his old life. His favorite place, back again. He'd forget about you for a solid three months, before they came back.

He always did.

You let him pull you up and dusted your hands off. You flashed a quick, futile smile at him. The moment was lost like a grain of sand in the forever endless ocean, moving around in a way you couldn't get it back and know it was the same one as before.

"I'm gonna head out front." you called over your shoulder. "My shift ends soon."

You knew he'd nodded without looking as you walked out, a lost feeling drowning you as you stood by the counter and put on a fake smile for strangers. Jeremiah Fisher would be gone in less than a week. In less than a week, it wouldn't be him looking after you. You would be looking after yourself.

PRESENT ( jeremiah's pov )

I stared down at my phone subconsciously, thinking she'd have called me by now. December third, four AM. Always, yearly. Like clockwork. For the first time, she hadn't been on time.

I pushed off the road harder and the board hit a rock, sending me tumbling. I pushed myself off the ground, ignoring my scrapes and running towards the board.

I kicked it, channeling everything into an outlet. I pounded it, over and over, until the wood was broken and splintered and the fiery rage that had consumed me had dulled to a soft throb.

The rage was gone and so came the sadness, the nostalgia. The overwhelming feeling of loss although I hadn't really lost too much at all. Not in the eyes of anyone else.

Although in my eyes, she was everything. She always would be.

She'd posted a picture the other day. It sounds stalker-ish, but I just wanted to check up on her, like always.

She was sitting on the swing in her backyard, my house poking out through the bushes. She was smiling, but it didn't reach her eyes. She held a book in her hand, and I knew it was unread, because my Sunflower would be happily content in the pages of a book instead of holding it at a distance.

It looks like she's happy. Like she was thinking, daydreaming. But when she daydreams she squints her eyes, she lays her head somewhere, and her eyes close half-way. And when she thinks, she digs her thumbnail into her inner palm.

She was sad. Although she didn't think anyone would notice, I did. I always did. I knew her too well not to.

PAST ( y/n's pov, 7 months earlier )

"God, Sunflower." Jeremiah groaned, laying you gently to sit in the drivers seat. You grabbed his face with both your hands, palms on either side. Jeremiah kissed you on the cheek, smiling weakly before walking away to slip into the drivers seat.

"I'm sorry, J." you mumbled, laying your head back and closing your eyes. Your head was pounding and whirling all at once. You felt Jeremiah's ocean blue eyes on you, seeing their color because it was really all you thought about.

His hand grabbed your chin and tilted your face toward him, causing you to turn your gaze on him. "Don't apologize for shit. You didn't do anything, Sunny. You got drunk, and I'm helping you." he let go of your chin. "Like you always help me."

You smiled lazily, throwing your arms around his neck and hugging him loosely. "I do help you a lot." you drawled. Jeremiah laughed, a sound that was so melodious that it paused your headache. You wanted to bottle the sound and get drunk on that, although you didn't think your body could take much more of it.

He shoved you off carefully, leaning over you and pushing your seat back. When he was done he fastened your seatbelt and looked around the back, grabbing a trashcan he'd shoved in there earlier to hand to you.

When you were alright he started the car, looking out at the road although you saw him focus on you using the corner of his eye. Jeremiah would never leave you out of sight, out of protection.

You may not be siblings, or best friends, or lovers, no matter how much you wanted the last two. You may just be good friends from work, friends that help each other no matter what. Although your excuses were that doing two times the work for one person's pay was pretty invalidating. But Jeremiah would always act like you were special. Like you were his. And who were you to deny him that?

PRESENT ( jeremiah's pov )

I wondered if she was getting drunk tonight. I was sitting on the sidewalk, thinking about her, and she was probably getting drunk, or getting hurt. And God I was scared. I didn't want her doing any shit anymore. Especially not today.

She hated today. So much. She would be on high alert, wouldn't fall for anything. Before me she wouldn't let anyone talk to her. After me, she still wouldn't. But during me, it was all we did. It was a solid distraction, which was all she needed.

I knew how she felt. I was one of the only people that did. And I knew if she got hurt tonight, if something bad happened and someone called to tell me, I wouldn't be able to piece myself back together again. Not for the second time.

PAST ( y/n's pov, 7 months earlier )

I threw the rag into the sink, drying my hands off on the towel attached to my apron. Long veiny arms wrapped around me, muscles clenching at the biceps.

"Hey, J." you turned around and smiled, slipping out of his grip in a stupid manner. You hit the counter and slipped on a wet puddle, head colliding with the marble ground. You groaned, feeling Jeremiah fall onto his knees beside you.

"Y/N, Sunflower, babe, you can't be doing that." nerves laced his voice, his tone familiar. You tried to sit up on your elbows but Jeremiah lay you back down gently. If you didn't have an ache pounding at your skull you would have blushed from his various nicknames.

"Are you okay? You need ice? Hospital. I'm gonna call someone." Jeremiah blurted, his words jumbled and fast. You giggled, a sharp pain stabbing your skull again.

"Ice, J." you moaned. "Just ice." Jeremiah was up in an instant. He never wanted you injured, never liked seeing you hurt. He never liked seeing anyone he liked hurt. He'd seen enough loved ones suffer enough hurt.

A cool pressure was pressed to your head. "Thanks." you sighed out of relief, letting him lift you up carefully. Jeremiah carried you to one of the couches. You'd been about to close up so the place was empty. It was all yours.

Jeremiah made you look him in the eye. He held up his hands and without uttering a single word himself, made you name every single number he gestured. Then he looked into your pupils and you could only take so much sustained eye contact before you broke it.

"No concussion." he declared, making sure you stayed laying down. He kneeled next to the couch and held your hand.

"Thanks for taking care of me." you leaned into his touch, head tilting towards his.

"I'll always take care of you." he said lightly, like the words were a feather. But they took up a hammer of a weight in your heart, a weight that pressured you and lifted you up all at once. "I'll always save you, Sunflower."

Jeremiah Fisher wasn't a liar. But he also wasn't a seer.

PRESENT ( y/n's pov )

Lights were flashing and blinding and red was everywhere, scarlett gushing. Red, red, red. Spots and puddles, hidden within the small pieces of black metal. Sirens were heard in the distance, and so were some voices. But you couldn't recall any of it for if they asked later.

There are moments in life that are blurs. Moments that move so fast you don't know where they went or how you lost them. This was one of those moments.

But usually those aren't moments that you remember the one boy you've ever loved. Because in those moments you're living.

In Y/N's only one of these moments, she was dying.

PRESENT ( jeremiah's pov )

They called me and I heard but I didn't understand. I didn't process it. I walked through the streets and back into the house and collapsed into bed and the tears flowed, freely, disastrously.

I felt numb and consumed, all at once. Tidal waves of emotion were crashing down onto me and an overwhelming grief washed over them.

It was your fault,

You should have been there,

You promised.

And then a faint voice, at the back of it all.

But it's not your job anymore.

[dragonsarecool]

Whumptober Day 4 - Hidden Injury

Four: Hidden Injury

A/N: Set a few weeks after 'Explorers on the Moon'

"Are you sure you're not coming, Captain?" Tintin finished tying his shoelaces, gazing up at his friend. "It really is a great market! Some of the stall food is to die for-"

"No thank you! I've had enough of traipsing around for a while," Haddock flipped over the page in his newspaper, his gaze firmly focused on the words in front of him.

Tintin let out an exasperated sigh. "Captain, it's been four weeks since we came back from the moon. You can't stay at Marlinspike forever-"

"Are you sure about that?! I think going to the moon made me realise why I hate travelling - because we somehow almost always get killed! So, no thank you, lad!" The Captain ruffled his newspaper for emphasis. "I'm going to stay on my couch and enjoy my country air."

"There is air at the market as well, Captain, and plenty of it," Tintin smirked. "But if you're sure-"

"Believe me, Tintin, I am sure! I am not budging from this seat! And nothing is going to make me change my mind!"

Throwing his hands up in mock surrender, Tintin nodded and opened the front door. "Just make sure to look after Snowy while I'm gone, okay?"

"Of course, Tintin!" Haddock lowered his newspaper to look at the young man. "But why isn't he going with you?"

"As I told you yesterday, Captain," Tintin buttoned up the front of his coat, "it's a pet-free market. Besides, I think he's rather comfortable where he is, wouldn't you agree?"

The Captain scowled as he looked below his newspaper. Snowy had taken up residence on his lap almost as soon as he'd sat down for his morning coffee, and was now currently engaged in licking his tail clean. "Er…yes, well, t-that's another reason I'm not going-"

"Goodbye, Captain! I'll be back for dinner!" Tintin pulled the front door closed, his laughter muffled through the glass.

Haddock shook his head fondly as he gave Snowy a brief scratch behind the ears. "I'd rather you were a cat, but at least you're clean."

Leaning back into the couch, the Captain resumed his examination of the newspaper, enjoying the faint sounds of morning birdsong. Why Tintin had decided to make a trip to Brussels this early in the morning for a market, of all things, was beyond him. Regardless, he was glad the younger man still maintained a thirst for travelling, even if was only a local day trip.

Haddock glanced over at the clock. It was just after eight AM, and the sunlight streaming through the front windows was already quite bright. He lowered his gaze to Snowy, who had progressed to licking his unmentionables, and Haddock instantly regretted looking. "You, my friend, have nine hours to get off my lap and do yer business elsewhere."

Snowy grunted in reply, and continued his morning hygiene.

*******

Luckily, for Haddock's sanity, Snowy had indeed removed himself from his lap. Granted, he would've let the faithful dog stay longer if were not for the protests of his bladder.

And besides, he needed that lunchtime whiskey.

While the Captain was aware that Tintin did occasionally get distracted while he was out, he'd come to admire the young man's sense of punctuality. On the other hand, however, the lad also had an unfortunate habit of being kidnapped while running his daily errands. The last time it had happened, Tintin hadn't returned until well after midnight, and had in fact fainted outside the front door.

So when the clock struck nine that evening and there had been no phone calls from Tintin, the gnawing pit of worry in his stomach continued to fester. Haddock perched himself in the front living room, sipping a bottle of whiskey in the hopes it would calm his nerves. Snowy had seemed to sense his distress, for the pup had taken up residence on a cushion next to Haddock.

Despite being incredibly worried, the dull patter of the rain on the windowpanes was enough to send Haddock into a light doze. Snowy, however, remained vigilantly fixated on the front door, his tail wagging with impatience.

The clock ticked over to ten thirty, the faint chime ringing through the empty hall.

As if on cue, the front door squeaked as it slowly opened, causing Snowy to let out a bark as he jumped off the couch and ran to greet his master.

Haddock shot up, pretending as if he'd never fallen asleep. "Blistering barnacles, Tintin, you know how to give an old man a fright!"

But when he finished rubbing his eyes and saw the state of the young man who collapsed through the doorway, his mouth quickly fell open. Haddock threw himself off the couch and sprinted to his friend, his concern mounting every second.

Snowy was barking furiously at a semi-conscious Tintin, who was struggling to lift his head off the ground. The young man was absolutely drenched, his thick brown coat having turned several shades darker as it was plastered to his skin. A giant bruise was forming on his left cheek, and Haddock noticed he was sporting an impressive, albeit very swollen black eye. His upper lip seemed to be split, a trail of blood creeping down his mouth and onto his sweater.

What worried the Captain the most, however, was the suspicious stain on Tintin's sweater that he was wrapping his arms around.

It took Haddock a few attempts to force his mouth to work. "Tintin! Blistering barnacles, what the hell happened?!"

"…Captain, I-" Tintin grimaced. "…I'm s-sorry I'm late…"

If Tintin hadn't looked like a walking corpse, Haddock thought he would've laughed. He grabbed the young man by the shoulders and held him upright, quickly realising that despite the multiple layers of clothing, Tintin was shivering. "Thundering typhoons, lad, I couldn't care what time you walk through the door! But what on Earth happened?!"

"…I-It's nothing, Captain…" Tintin gasped, seemingly unable to focus.. "…J-Just a disagreement, o-only a couple of punches—"

"A disagreement?! Lad, you look as though you got thrown off a roof!" Haddock placed his palm against Tintin's forehead, biting his lip in worry. "And yer developin' a fever already! Lad, you were only gone for a few hours!"

The fact that Tintin didn't laugh was immediately a cause for concern. The reporter weakly went to wipe his mouth on his sleeve, only for his arm to fall limply at his side.

Haddock watched in horror as Tintin's eyes rolled backwards, his battered body falling through Haddock's arms onto the carpet.

"NESTOR!" The Captain bellowed, a cold sweat breaking out on his forehead. "Nestor, call a doctor!"

The faithful butler came flying down the grand staircase, still carrying his feather duster from the evening chores. His eyes widened at the sight of a bloodied and beaten Tintin lying in his master's arms, and instantly sprinted towards the nearest telephone.

Haddock wrapped one of Tintin's arms around his shoulders, ignoring the searing pain that appeared in his spine as he tried to hoist the young man off the ground. Snowy continued to bark at his master's feet, which made navigating the unconscious man to the couch without stepping on the loyal animal a challenge.

The Captain groaned as he lowered Tintin onto the couch, placing a pillow behind his head. In the light of the living room he could better see the young man's injuries, and his stomach churned as he realised there was much more blood on Tintin's face than he first realised. He felt along the side of the younger man's neck, wincing at the lump his fingers danced across. Don't tell me he's going to have another concussion…

Tintin suddenly stirred, a small groan escaping his lips. He began to squirm on the couch until Haddock gently pinned his arms down, shushing him. "You're alright, lad, you're at Marlinspike."

"…Cap..tain?" Tintin's voice was small, and it made the Captain remember how young the lad actually was. "…Hurts…"

"I know, lad, it looks sore. But Nestor's just called a doctor, so you're going to be alright," Haddock kept his voice calm as he grasped Tintin's hand tightly. His eyes were once again drawn to a suspicious patch on Tintin's sweater, which seemed to be growing at an alarming rate. "Tintin, lad, you need to let me take a look at this-"

"No…hurts!…" Tintin croaked as a fresh wave of pain wracked his body. He weakly went to cross his arms across his stomach, only to let out a strangled cry as he passed out again.

Sighing deeply, the Captain gingerly raised the younger man's sweater. He nearly retched at the sight of Tintin's flesh, which was decorated with various shades of blue and brown bruising; Haddock had seen enough injuries in his time to know Tintin almost certainly had internal bleeding. A deep gash ran from the base of the young man's sternum to his navel, exposing the layers of skin that Haddock couldn't pronounce.

"Oh, lad…" Haddock muttered. He sprung up and dashed to the kitchen, snatching the first clean tea towel he could find. Tintin stirred as he pressed forcefully to slow the bleeding, weakly pulling himself away from Haddock.

"Shush, lad," Haddock felt sick as he heard the tea towel squeak as it absorbed the young man's blood. "It'll be alright, Tintin, we've just got to keep on top of this, ay?"

As a mercy to both of them, Tintin passed out for the third and seemingly final time, his shivering body growing still. Haddock had sat there with his finger firmly pressed against Tintin's neck until the doctor charged through the front door, desperately willing the boy's weak pulse to keep going. Come on, lad, don't you die on my couch…

****

"…Captain?"

Haddock startled awake, dropping the magazine he'd stolen from the hospital waiting room. He blinked furiously, his vision clearing to reveal a groggy, bloodied but alive Tintin in the bed in front of him. Bags of fluid and antibiotics hung above his bed, connecting to an intravenous port in his hand. A thick bandage was wrapped around the young man's head, and Haddock was pleased to see that the swelling in Tintin's left eye had gone down significantly. "Oh, lad…God be praised…"

"Captain?" Tintin's voice was hoarse. "What…happened?"

"You don't remember?" Haddock sighed. He'd forgotten the doctors had said Tintin did indeed have yet another concussion. It's a wonder this boy doesn't have brain damage. "Not surprising, lad, given what you've been through. Let me put it this way: next time you come home after bein' beaten half to death, lad, make sure you give me a list of yer injuries before we go to the hospital, alright?"

Despite the pain it caused him, Tintin let out a soft chuckle. "I'll do my best, Captain."

"And for God's sake, stop coming home with gashes spurtin' everywhere! Nestor spent ages cleaning the front doorstep!"

Haddock had intended it to be humorous, but was disturbed to find a dark expression settling on Tintin's face. "…You alright, lad?"

"The knife," Tintin spoke quietly, his hands resting to his stomach "…I remember the knife. He-"

"You're lucky he didn't do more damage to you, lad," Haddock interrupted. "You're also damn lucky I noticed it bleedin' through your clothes! The doctors said they had to do lots of internal-"

"He was aiming for my heart," Tintin whispered. He took in a shaky breath and stared at the ceiling. "…H-He was aiming for my heart, Captain…H-he didn't have very good aim…"

Tintin trailed off and the two men fell into silence, each unsure how to respond to the other.

They knew this wouldn't be the last time this happened, but for the moment, they were glad it hadn't ended differently.

[amchara]

Effortless (Or, the time Kit almost earned an A-Level) - Chapter One

So... exactly a year ago today I posted the final chapter of this fic to Ao3. I'm still quite proud of it and I've realised I've never posted it to tumblr. So I'mma gonna do so over the next couple of weeks, albeit in slightly more digestible wordcounts (7,000 word chapters are a bit long, I've since come to realise 😂).

And once that's done- I should hopefully have the first couple chapters of the sequel ready! 👀

Note: This fic starts in mid-2013, picking up Kit's story shortly after Ghosts of the Shadow Market's Forever Fallen short story. You can definitely read it without having read Forever Fallen but there are nods to it throughout.

As it was written and finished in early August 2021, it's not canon-compliant with Secrets of Blackthorn Hall but... at the same time, it's not a million miles off and as I'm posting the chapters here on tumblr, I am making small tweaks so it's closer to canon, or- as much as it can be. Unlike Cassie... I chose to give Kit friends that we actually see him interact with. 😂

Summary: After moving to England to live with Tessa and Jem, Kit ends up attending a local sixth form college alongside his Shadowhunter training.

Featuring- a charming but slightly broken Kit, typical teen drama, mundane friendships, pop culture references, Carstairs-Gray family moments, a rotating cast of our favourite Shadowhunters as guest tutors and of course, some unacknowledged pining for one Ty Blackthorn.

Wordcount: 4,039 words

Rating: Teen, no content warnings for this chapter

Read on Ao3

or One / Two / Three / Four / Five / Six / Seven (completed fic) 

-

Chapter One: Twilight, Cows and College

(August-September 2013)

Kit looked at the squat brown-brick building in front him, and then back at Tessa. She caught his eye, her mouth quirking up.

“So, is this where I give you the pep talk?” she asked. “As you know, I never attended myself, and James got expelled fairly quickly from the Academy-- so I’m not sure I have all that much wisdom but we can give it a try.”

“Nope, not at all,” said Kit, unbuckling his seatbelt, and grabbing the bag at his feet. “I’ll be fine.”

“Of course you will,” Tessa replied, a fond note creeping into her voice and Kit ducked his head, embarrassed but pleased at the trust she had in him.

Mina gurgled happily in the backseat, and Kit looked back at her with a smile.

“Don’t worry, I’m a Herondale, a Shadowhunter, a former Shadow Market vendor and… probably should have a minor criminal record if we’re honest. I think I can handle a British high school,” Kit said with a winning grin, as he opened the car door.

“Bye Min-Min, bye Tessa,” he said. He leaned into the door. “I also know about the bet Jace and Jem made about how long I would last and-” he smiled even wider. “I plan to make them both lose.”

Tessa winked at him, and looked back at Mina. “All right then. I think we’re set here. Mina mine- let’s get on with our busy day of shopping and visiting the local library.” She turned her attention back to Kit. “Do you want me to pick you up at half three?”

Kit shook his head. “I’ll take the bus back to the village and then walk. If there’s one thing I learned from high school movies, it’s that while you can get your pare- adults to drop you off, only losers get picked up after school. I should probably start off on the right foot.”

“Let’s go with the experts then,” Tessa said mock-gravely. “See you after school. And have fun,” she said, with a tiny wave.

Kit straightened up and turned towards his new school. Altofts Sixth Form. “All right, let’s do this,” he muttered to himself as he walked towards the entrance.

--

It had all started with his early morning running. A terrible habit to have picked up. One that Jem had called him on, earlier in the summer when he had agreed to train with Kit.

Kit had actually taken to getting up early back in the winter. He hadn’t admitted it to Jem and Tessa but his nightmares - swirling terrors of both mantid demons and black shapes with white burning eyes had him waking up gasping and drenched in sweat - combined with the lack of central heating that turned his room into a freezer until the heat turned on again at seven... it just wasn’t conducive to sleeping in.

At first he had just tried to walk downstairs to get snacks from the kitchen and watch some tv. But soon after Mina was born he realised any sound would be liable to wake her, given the bat-eared hearing babies seemed to have. And he didn’t want to be the cause of further sleeplessness for Jem and Tessa.

So he started slipping down the back staircase by his room into the garden. And well… no use freezing in the garden and he still had delusions he might still want to be a full proper Shadowhunter someday, or at very least, not die horribly if slash when this whole First Heir thing caught up to him. It was also probably worth being fast enough to run away if he needed to.

Plus, the scenery was beautiful, given Cirenworth was located close to the edge of Dartmoor. Running alongside the narrow, suicidal-for-more-than-one-car lanes, with trees forming tangled green arcs overhead, across old stone bridges into ancient woods and up high, rolling sparse hills, he had plenty of other things to look at and not think about how he had messed things up, until the aching in his legs and burning in his lungs made him stop. Which was, admittingly, getting rarer, even in the occasional stifling heat of July.

He had a whole route figured out now, four months in. Which was why, Kit admitted to himself, he was irritated that someone else had found a similar path.

It was only for about two miles just on the outskirts of the village but Kit had seen him out of the corner of his eye most days the past week.

He was taller than Kit (most guys his own age seemed to be) and he usually wore what looked like a basketball jersey, shorter shorts than Kit figured most American teen boys would be comfy with, and had oversized headphones either on his head or around his neck. Other than that, he didn’t remind Kit of anyone.

The first time, the other boy had nodded at him in a friendly way as Kit had run past the tree where the boy was stretching, his white teeth flashing briefly in his dark-skinned face. Kit had nodded back and kept on running. It wasn’t that he wanted to be unfriendly… but he hadn’t really thought about making new friends, and figured given his background of Shadowhunter and part of a long-lost line of faerie royalty, it might be harder to relate to any new ones, especially mundanes.

Plus, he wasn’t sure he was that great of a friend, given the mess that had happened at the LA Institute. So he had been distant to any friendly overtures from local teens his age since he had arrived at Cirenworth, although he had to admit, he hadn’t minded the attention the giggling squad of girls outside the bakery gave him. Or the occasional chat with the kids of the werewolf pack that Tessa and Jem invited around sometimes.

But a week into this new shadow, Kit had rounded a particularly tricky corner on the narrow path and found the other boy, frozen in place. And Kit could immediately see why. He was surrounded by cows.

Now, cows might not seem like a dangerous situation but after nearly being trampled by an angry bull early on in his explorations of the Devon countryside, Kit was inclined to give any other bovines as far a berth as he could while running. Or in any other situation honestly.

Kit met the other boy’s eyes. “You er- ok?” he called.

“Ahh. Maybe?” The boy looked panicked as two cows started moving towards him, one cutting him off from the fence Kit could see he was trying to inch towards.

Kit made his decision. “Hey cows!” he shouted. The cows ignored him. Kit summoned up his courage and started jogging towards the small herd, waving his arms. “You heifers! You lazy… demonic spawn!”

The boy goggled at him and Kit narrowed his eyes. “Hop the fence!” he yelled, as a couple cows started moving towards him. Kit gulped and summoned all his courage and ran directly towards him, hoping the cow in the way would move and he wouldn’t have to dodge it or worse, attempt a leap over it. It did, and Kit stopped to grab at the boy’s arm, who finally started moving. They both scrambled up over the wide, stone fence to the next field, which was thankfully cow-less.

“Thanks,” the boy said, as they both climbed down. “That would’ve been an embarrassing end.” He grinned, brushing off the dirt from his shorts. “I’m Ade.”

“Kit,” Kit answered cautiously, as the adrenaline in his system slowly started to leave.

“Yeah, I’ve seen you around,” Ade said. “Mate, you’re fast.”

Kit thought back to his time in the LA Institute and watching Emma run swiftly over miles of sandy beach, and even the time that he and the twins had run along the Thames to escape the Riders of Manan. He was slow, compared to others. “No, not really.”

“Ooh, an American! Didn’t expect that,” Ade whistled, disentangling his headphones from his short-cropped black curls as they both started walking towards the other side of the field to rejoin the road. “You here with your family on holiday?”

“No,” said Kit shortly. “I live just outside Sefton Crufts.” He glanced over, wondering if Ade knew about Cirenworth. A lot of the locals in the village did, and he knew Tessa and Jem (alongside Mina) had basically gathered a fan club.

“No joke?” Ade said. “That’s cool. I live in...” He named a village that Kit thought he remembered was a few miles back. “What high school did you go to?”

“Oh, I erm- homeschooled,” Kit mumbled, looking down. Time for the lies.

Ade nodded. “I see.” They trudged through some bushes. At the edge of the road, Ade looked at Kit and gestured towards the buildings off in the distance. “Hey, given you basically saved my life from… what was it you called them…. Demonic cow spawn? Do you want to get breakfast with me at ‘spoons? We’re pretty close to it - I’ll pay.”

Kit started to shake his head but suddenly his stomach betrayed him and made a loud gurgling sound, reminding him that he’d been up since six and had just run the better part of seven miles. Ade let out a big laugh. “Hah, you can’t argue with that, man,” he said, pointing at Kit’s midsection. “Let’s go eat.”

--

“Wow, this is really good,” Kit said, shoveling in the eggs and bacon.

Ade looked at him over a similar pile of breakfast, his friendly brown eyes puzzled. “Yeah, of course.” As if it were obvious. “Have you never had a Wetherspoons breakfast? When did you move here?”

“Last fall,” Kit said, figuring as long as he stuck to the basics, he could manage small talk without issue. “And no, I haven’t. But my- Jem and Tessa have taken me to the Bull and Hart. Food is also good there.”

“Ah,” Ade nodded wisely. “The gastropub.” He looked Kit over, as if assessing him. “Yeah, that tracks. I’m glad to give you some introduction to proper English pub food then.”

Kit thought he had been vaguely insulted - or at least labeled. He changed the topic. “I’ve been running that route for a few months now. But I only just saw you on it this week. Did you just move here too?”

Ade shook his head. “Nah, I’m not local either. But I’ve been here longer than you. My parents moved us down from London so my mum could take over a GP practice, but it was before I started GCSE’s.” He speared a couple of sausages and stuffed them in his mouth, chewing. He continued. “Football season starts in a couple weeks, and I’m starting at Altofts College and want to be on first squad. So I thought I should work on my endurance, given I spent most of the spring prepping for exams.” He lowered his voice. “I plan to go to Kings for medicine so I was kind of a nerd for most of last year.”

Kit had only understood about half the previous sentences but he nodded. “Plus you want to be able to outrun any further cow-based incidents,” he cracked.

Ade grinned cockily. “Well, let’s see. But I figured you seem to have that route down- how about you be my cow-guard?”

“If you’ll get my breakfast, sure,” Kit said, his mouth full of toast.

“It’s a deal Kit…” Ade trailed off.

“Kit… Herondale,” he answered.

--

After that day while Kit and Ade kept to their respective routes, and were able to avoid further herds of cows, they started meeting up for Wetherspoons’ breakfasts a few times a week, with the healthy appetite of the teenage boys they were. There they discovered that they while they didn’t support the same football teams (Kit didn’t understand the obsession really, but had adopted the same team Jem supported - Liverpool - and Ade was a hardcore Millwall fan), they had other common interests, including absurdist comedies like Peep Show, the IT Crowd and the In-Betweeners, that Kit had discovered the previous winter.

Until the day the pub greeted them with a ‘No electricity’ sign and Kit decided to invite Ade back to Cirenworth. He had told Jem and Tessa about Ade after the first couple of meetings, and while they were their typical low-pressure selves, Kit thought they were happy he had made a friend and told Kit to invite him around sometime.

“Whoa, I had heard…” Ade said, trailing off as they walked up the long yard to the huge manor house, rain drizzling down the grey slates. English weather in August - one hour it was warm and sunny, and then the next like mid-November. “You like… a long-lost American heir to some posh Downton Abbey shit?” He elbowed Kit in jest. 

Kit let out a rude noise. “As if.” He suddenly became nervous though. There were rarely mundanes in the house - sometimes builders, given Tessa and Jem were still making the place habitable, plus a couple of mums and babies sometimes from Tessa’s local baby group. It’s not as if Ade or anyone could tell that he was anything other than a normal person. Well… as long as they avoided the training room. And maybe keep Ade away from the old family photos. Tessa looked a bit too ageless at times, Kit thought.

But as it transpired, Kit hadn’t needed to have worried. Jem and Mina had made their usual pilgrimage to the bakery, and they had all sat in the now-sunny garden and feasted on pastries, thick, buttery toast and fresh orange juice. 

Ade had appropriately complimented Mina: “Your sister’s really cute. Almost as cute as my nieces.” And had asked polite enough questions to the lies that Jem and Tessa told him about what brought them to England and Cirenworth. “So you’re like- an art dealer, that’s really cool.” And had given them enough about his own background: “Yeah, so like my mum’s a GP, she moved here after studying medicine in Lagos and my dad was in the army but now he does security installations for rich footballers and bankers with second homes near Dartmoor. My sisters live in London- yeah, I’m the youngest. I can’t wait to go back to London. Devon’s okay but it’s not the city.”

He said with the fervor of a true believer and Kit remembered his brief time in London. He hadn’t been back since… well, since he had left with the Blackthorns.

He was briefly lost in his memories that he almost missed the next part of the conversation.

“Kit should come study at Altofts,” Ade said. “I know it’s probably not the same as the American system but it has a really good reputation- they sent like, three people to Oxbridge last year. And lots to Exeter and the London unis.”

“I think that’s up to Kit,” Jem said, with a small smile, as he sipped his coffee.

Kit was confused. Attend a mundane high school? That had never been brought up. He cleared his throat. “Hey- should we go up to my room? I’ve got CoD on my playstation.”

“Yeah, tight,” Ade said cheerfully. “Thanks for breakfast,” he said nodding to Jem and Tessa, who were both looking bemused.

--

“He has a point,” Jem said, later on, as he and Kit finished up in the garden from their daily training regime.

Kit looked up from where he was currently doubled over in pain. Jem had run him hard today- they had ended with some hand-to-hand combat, and Jem had finished off by throwing him in some kind of super harsh judo flip. Kit was fairly sure he needed an iratze for his ribs...“What?”

“Your friend. You’re training with me but there’s only so much Shadowhunter training we can do in a day- plus, I still have other responsibilities I need to see to. Going to this college could be a good thing for you.”

Oh. Kit’s chest went tight. He knew Jem had other errands and things he needed to see to in regards to restoring Cirenworth. He hadn’t realised the training might be taking up too much of his time.

“And you can meet other kids your age,” Tessa called in her low, musical voice. She and Mina had been sitting on a plaid blanket a little ways off from the cleared training ground.

“You mean, you think I can pull off the dual roles of training for epic battles between good and evil and still do my calculus homework?” Kit said sarcastically but he started to feel a twinge of excitement as he considered the proposal. It wasn’t that he had been bored this past winter - he and Tessa had done enough homeschooling ahead of Mina’s birth and he had spent a lot of quality time wallowing in his room and shooting out his feelings on his playstation… but he wasn’t sure he could do that for a second winter in a row.

Tessa grinned. “Buffy did it. I think you could.”

“Heh, well- you’d probably know, right?” Kit shot back.

“What’s that supposed to mean?” Tessa said slowly, her eyebrows raising.

“C’mon- you mean in the past century, you never pulled an Edward Cullen and went to high school again?” Kit asked skeptically.

“Read the book,” Tessa said automatically, as she shook her head and pulled Mina up into her lap. But a blush emerged on her cheeks and Kit saw an opening.

“Saw the movie,” Kit replied, fascinated. “Hah, you did! Nothing to be ashamed about, Tessa. I bet there’s a reason so many vampires- or at least vampires in movies do it.”

Jem watched as they went back and forth, his face a study of confusion, as it so often did when they traded pop culture quips.

“No, I never attended a high school,” Tessa corrected him. “But I… may have a few English degrees.”

Jem looked at her fondly. “I know you did Cambridge in the 90s…” he said. “But what were the other ones?”

“Berkeley in 1965, and Columbia in the late 80s,” Tessa replied. “But the point is, Kit. You’re not a warlock. This is your chance to have a typical high school experience.”

“Shouldn’t I be having a typical Shadowhunter teen experience?”

Jem and Tess exchanged looks. “Well…” Tessa said gently. “There’s not really a typical experience but in terms of the more usual ones… most go to either the Academy, or are tutored in their local Institute.”

“Neither which are an option for me,” Kit said, suddenly feeling a bit bitter. “I need to avoid most Downworld or Shadowhunter places until we know more about the First Heir stuff.”

Jem was sympathetic. “We would’ve liked to have helped you with this, Kit. We did mean to get you a tutor but given the… upheaval in the last year with the Cohort… there are fewer Shadowhunters around anyway, and many of them are tied to their Institute or are helping out with the reformed Academy in New York.”

“I’m enjoying training with you, Jem,” Kit said slowly, not sure where the conversation was going. Did Jem want to stop?

Jem smiled. “I know. I am too. And I think it’s going well- and we’ll continue with it.” He stepped closer to Kit, and clapped a hand on his shoulder. “But… I think it’s good to not just focus on Shadowhunter education to the exclusion of everything else.”

His eyes took on a sudden, far away look, and Kit thought he saw some sorrow pass through them. “Given the events of the past few years- I think there are going to be more changes and upheaval coming for Shadowhunters and the Downworld. Having some who understand both the Shadowhunter and mundane world, and who can bridge the two cultures and their histories- that will help us all navigate through it.”

Kit thought back to some of the conversations he had had with members of the Cohort, and even with Emma and the Blackthorns, all of whom had been fairly ignorant of twentieth century history and some of the parallels which were currently happening within Shadowhunter society.

He took a deep breath. “Yeah- I get where you’re coming from. When you put it that way- the hard job of getting high and making out with people under the bleachers to be this noble task…” he held his hand up, as he saw both Jem and Tessa take synchronised breaths as if to respond. “Jokes- I’m in.”

They both smiled. “We can go into Totnes tomorrow and pick you up a syllabus so you can choose your courses,” Tessa said, as Mina drooled on her shoulder. Kit didn’t think that was the right wording but he nodded.

“Oh, and don’t think if you go, you’re going to have an easier time on your Shadowhunter training. I’ve been in contact with several Institutes and people we know… it’ll be good for you to have exposure to different ways of fighting and training,” Jem informed him. “So- starting from next month, we’ll be hosting several guest tutors for you.” His normally mild smile held more of an edge. “I think you’ll enjoy it.”

Kit gulped. “Yay?”

--

So, that was how he, Kit Herondale, future Shadowhunter extraordinaire and heir to the First Heir or whatever, ended up at a sixth form college in South Devon. It wasn’t going to be entirely like he had seen in movies- this seemed more like a cross between community college and high school, Kit thought, as he pulled out the schedule he had been given from the front office. 

The secretary had almost swooned when he walked in, telling him she loved his accent and so Kit left feeling pretty smug. But that smugness had quickly drained away as other people streamed around him and he tried to figure out what the double and single blocks meant, and what the hell was a tutor group…?

“Yo, Herondale!” he heard a voice call. Kit looked up and saw Ade approaching. Kit had texted him earlier.

“You’re here,” Ade said delightedly, after he had clapped Kit on the back in greeting. “Noice.” He gestured to his friends around him. “This is Eamonn, Tom and Ben. Lads- this is Kit Herondale. He’s an American, from Los Angeles.”

The other boys looked vaguely impressed, and he made small talk with them as they threaded their way through the busy halls. Ade checked Kit’s schedule. “Awesome- we’re in the same tutor group, although…” his eyes danced down the page. “Nothing else-” he handed it back to back to Kit. “Not surprising though- I’m on a one way ticket to study medicine in London with Chemistry, Bio, Physics and Maths and you’re- an artsy lad,” he said, with a friendly grin. “Which is good, no rivalry between us.”

“Yeah,” Kit mumbled. He had chosen Art (he wanted photography but it hadn’t been offered as a full A-Level), English Literature (for Tessa and because he actually did like reading the classics, he had discovered), History (because someone had to know about mundane history, according to Jem) and Film Studies (because duh).

Kit and Ade split off from the rest of his friends and went into a classroom.

The tutor group seemed to be like the American version of a homeroom, and Kit relaxed into his seat as the teacher in the front of the class droned on about regulations and expectations. As he leaned back in his chair, he took stock of his new classmates.

“Psst,” came a hiss from his right. Kit looked over, and saw a girl with brown hair cut in a severe bob smile at him. He smiled back; he planned to unleash the full Herondale charm at this school.

“I like your tattoo,” she whispered, pointing at his hand.

Kit froze. He looked straight ahead, ignoring her. Before heading out of the house in the morning, he had spent time painstakingly drawing a glamour rune on his arm, to hide his other runes, including the very obvious Voyance one.

Shit. There were mundanes here in the school with the Sight. Well… that was going to make things interesting…

-

Not going to bother with my usual taglist for this one, given it's technically not a new fic but feel free to let me know if you want to be notified when I post updates and I will start a new taglist for it.

[bestintheparsec]

Between the Lines

Frankie Morales x F!Reader

Summary: A trip to the bookstore brings you more than you’re looking for.

A/N: This is just something short/sweet I came up with (it’s probably the least deep or angsty thing I’ve ever written, unlike my usual). It’s a standalone, but obviously I have a thing for coffee...anyways, I hope you like it!

Words: 1.8k

Warnings: none

(Masterlist pinned to my page)

~

You've found it.

After countless stops at multiple bookstores, you've managed to track down the book you've been searching long and hard for. It's a new release you've been eager to get your hands on—collector's edition, special content included. Every store you've gone to has been completely sold out of it, but after many phone calls and Google searches you'd found a store, one town over, that still had it.

Determined to get it this time, you'd shown up as soon as the store opened today. Stepping inside you see that it's a fairly big store, but it seems to be a local place since you'd never heard of it prior to your extensive search. You make a mental note to come back here more often, taking in the quaintness of it. There's plenty of books, of course, but there's also a section full of cute memorabilia and stationery, and a cozy coffee place tucked into the back corner.

It doesn't take you long to find the section you're looking for—you easily spot the beautiful cover on a display at the center of the store. There's only one copy left, and you're giddy with excitement and relief as you reach for it, sliding it out of its spot. It's the last one on the shelf, but it's in impeccable condition—no wrinkles or folds on the cover or pages, and not a single fingerprint on the jacket. Usually the last ones to go are ones that have been handled by other readers, shoved aside for a more pristine copy on the shelf. But this is your copy now, and it's perfect.

Smiling to yourself and cradling it in your arms, you walk hurriedly back to the front to pay for it and finally take it home. Turning quickly around the corner and not paying attention to anything else in particular, you wonder how long it'll take you to finish it.

And then you crash into something large and sturdy. The book falls onto the floor with a clunk and you feel something hot splash onto your skin. Someone steadies you, only for a moment before stepping back.

You gasp and blurt out an ouch! before realizing that said large and sturdy person was holding a cup of coffee, which is now spilled all over the front of your shirt and the floor.

“Shit, I'm so sorry, are you okay?” a deep voice asks frantically. Still processing what happened, you haven't looked up, focusing on shaking the brown beverage off of yourself.

Some of the hot liquid is on your arm so you briskly brush it off and shake out the front of your shirt, trying to cool off your skin. It's not until a large pair of hands gently takes your wrist, dabbing your arm with a napkin hastily pulled out of his pocket, that you finally look up at this person—and find an unassumingly handsome, albeit panicked-looking, man with wide brown eyes and a face that looks about as hot as your skin feels. You let yourself imagine that if this weren't an inconvenient moment, you might be looking at him as if something clicked into place.

“I'm so sorry, we should get some cold water on that,” he says again, urgently, wiping away at your skin before realizing he's still holding onto your arm and awkwardly letting go.

“No, it's fine, I'm a klutz, really,” you mutter to yourself, dropping your eyes to the book on the ground. It's covered in coffee now, too, much to your disappointment. Way to go, you chide yourself, deflated at the sight. Not only have you ruined the book you've gone through so much trouble to find, but you've also embarrassed yourself in front of this cute stranger in the process.

This is why you stick to books.

“I've ruined your shirt...and this book,” the man murmurs, bending down to pick it up. His furrowed brows and pursed lips make him appear softer than you might expect.

He meets your eyes, swallowing hard and peering at you with what can only be considered as puppy dog eyes. You really look at him for the first time, noticing the unruly dark curls poking out from under his cap, and the distinctly “outdoorsy” attire he has on, worn-out flannel button-up and suede jacket and all. Honestly, he looks mortified, but it's sort of endearing that he's so concerned when many others would've just muttered a curt apology before leaving you to your business. In any case, you find yourself wanting to know more about him. It's a thought you immediately push away; after all, you'd only just met him and he probably only thinks of you as some clumsy girl.

“It's okay, really, it's my fault,” you shake your head at him. “I'm an idiot, I wasn't watching where I was going.”

“But that coffee was really hot, it might've burned you—” he insists.

“I'm wearing another layer under this,” you reassure the man. Taking the book from his hands, you sigh quietly. “I can't say the same for this, though.”

He looks like he's about to ask you something else when another man, probably his friend, walks up next to him, glancing back and forth between you before making a face like yikes when he sees the large stain on your shirt.

"It's not his fault," you sputter at the same time that Coffee Man mumbles, "It was my fault."

After inquiring if you're alright, his friend reaches down to pick up the now-empty cup from the ground, then playfully smacks the man's arm.

“I can't even leave you alone for one minute,” he shakes his head jovially and you almost miss the mischievous eyebrow raise he gives him before turning back to you. “You know...you should let Francisco here take care of that. He's military—first-aid-trained and all,” the friend says with a grin and knowing wink. Coffee Man's jaw clenches, glancing timidly at you as his friend keeps talking, then shooting him a glare that says please stop fucking talking.

"Now you've ruined my coffee and a pretty girl's shirt," his friend jokes.

Coffee Man tries to smile but is visibly embarrassed as he swats his friend on the arm. “Get your own fucking coffee, then, Santi,” he tells him under his breath, which elicits a grin out of you.

Santi throws his hands up in mock-surrender. “Alright, alright. It was nice meeting you,” he nods and smiles at you before walking away.

“I really am sorry,” he tells you again as soon as his friend is out of sight. He fidgets with his hat, removing it for a second to smooth out his hair and then pulling it snugly back down. “I—I'll get you another copy of the book. And a new shirt…”

You chuckle, trying to put him at ease. “Seriously, it's fine…um, Francisco, was it?”

“Oh—Frankie,” he tells you, the smallest of smiles on his lips. He peers at you with that concerned gaze again and you both keep eye contact for what feels like several moments longer than necessary. Despite yourself, you start to feel heat creeping into your face.

Smiling softly back at him, you suddenly feel self-conscious and hug your arms to yourself. “Well, Frankie, it's no big deal. I was going to go home after this, and this shirt is old, anyways." You examine the damage to the book, flipping through the pages. "Mostly I just wanted this book—it's the last copy in the store...but that's okay, too. There are worse things.”

“What's it about?”

“Hmm?” you reply, looking back up at him.

“What's, um, what's the...book about? It has to be good if you were so excited to get it.”

You hadn't expected him to care what you were reading, and you can tell by the shy look in his eyes that it's a genuine question and not anything more.

“Oh. Well…” you start, and it doesn't take long for you to go off about its synopsis and why you've been waiting forever for it. It takes a while for you to realize that you're rambling, and you stop your muddled train of thought. But by the soft look in his eyes as he listens, you get the feeling that Frankie doesn't mind. That, or he's the kind of person who always makes the people around him feel comfortable.

"Anyways, I should let you go on with your day…" you trail off, but both of you remain where you are, not seeming to want to move.

“Wait—will you let me pay for the book?” Frankie insists. “They'll want someone to cover the damage. It's the least I can do.”

“Actually...I think I'm going to keep this copy,” you tell him. “It's still in decent condition and I can read it while I wait for them to get more in.”

Frankie smiles at you, genuinely and without embarrassment for the first time. “You really are excited for it, aren't you?”

“Yep,” you reply with a nod. “It's the same story, even if covered in your friend's drink,” you tease.

“Okay, if you're sure,” he continues. “I'm sorry again, um…I didn't catch your name.”

You tell him and he smiles again, repeating it.

“It was nice meeting you, Frankie,” you tell him as his large hand shakes yours. “Please don't worry about all this.”

Returning the sentiment, Frankie turns to head back to his friend. For a second you consider calling to him, asking to see him again. Not that you'd be bold enough to actually do that. But he quickly disappears behind the rows of shelves and you figure he has other places to be, anyways.

~

It's almost a week later when you return to the bookstore.

You'd given the front desk your number so they could call you when more copies came in, so you asked them to hold one for you, which they happily did. When you get to the register you find the same cashier who helped you last time, greeting her with a smile. She knows what happened last time, grinning as she hands you the book carefully wrapped in a plastic bag.

When you reach for your wallet she shakes her head. “Oh, no, honey. You're good to go,” she tells you. 

You look at her, confused, and she smiles again. “Think of it as a makeup for the last one you already paid for.”

After her insistence, and many thanks on your part, you take the book and leave. When you get to the car, you take it out of the bag, pleased to finally have it. You find the smooth receipt neatly tucked in between the pages and pull it out.

What you don't expect is, at the bottom, it has some handwriting scribbled in pen along with a phone number jotted down under the note. Warmth sneaks into your cheeks and you smile as you read the words.

Would you maybe like to get coffee sometime? I promise not to spill it on you this time. -Frankie

 ~

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[suchalonelysunflower]

You Said Forever (c.h)

Pairing: Calum Hood x Reader

Requested: Yes!

Summary: Based on the song “Driver’s License” by Olivia Rodrigo. You did everything you could to get over him, you talked to friends, went on long drives and even wrote him a song. Why cant you just let him go?

Warnings: Angst. Language. Mentions of alcohol. Some grammar mistakes? (English is not my first language, I’m sorry)

Word count: 6.7 k

Author’s Note: I’m so excited someone requested this! I highly recommend listening to the song before you read, references are in the text and dialogs. Please remember that Reblogs, Coments, Feedback and Likes are more than welcome and encouraged! You don’t know how much they help me 💕 Hope you like it and Happy reading 🦋

Fic of the week // My Materialist // wanna be part of my tag list?

@rime-warrior : Hey love! Has anyone requested an imagine for Calum based on the song “Drivers license” by Olivia Rodrigo yet? I think you’re the only one who would be able to do it any justice 😭💕

“I still see your face in the white cars, front yards

Can't drive past the places we used to go to

'Cause I still fucking love you, babe”

You could hear the doorbell ring over the thunderous storm raging outside. It was late, probably closer to midnight than you imagined. Who could possibly be outside right now? especially in this kind of weather?

After four consecutive rings, you decided to get up from your spot on the bed and walk up to the door. It must be something very important for someone to startle you that way.

Once you got closer to the door you could also distinguish some strong bangs coming from the other side accompanied by the endless ringing “Okay, okay! I’m coming!” You called, but whoever was standing opposite to you mustn’t have heard you as they continued to disrupt the peace of a stormy night.

A shiver ran down your spine before you could reach the doorknob, almost like the ghost of a feeling, a warning for you not to open the door. Despite your common sense, you decided to open the door, already being too late to go back.

“Calum?”

He was standing in front of you, completely drenched from head to toes. His breathing was uneven, almost like he ran all the way over here, but his eyes were set on yours, unmoving as you both tried to take each other in.

“Calum-what is?-” Your words got stuck in your mouth as he pushed himself forward, grabbing your face delicately as he clashed his lips with yours.

You felt yourself melt into the kiss, making it everything you ever wished for. You wrapped your arms around his neck and deepened the kiss as you brought him closer to you. He was here, he was finally here with you. It all feels like a dream.

Your alarm clock marked 6 AM when you jumped from your dreams into reality. You should’ve known, everything was too good to be true.

You brought one hand to your face, trying to wipe away the tiredness of your eyes, but you found your cheeks were humid due to tears you didn’t even know you shed through the night, damping your pillow sheets once again.

It was always the same dream: Calum coming back to you. Night after night your mind drifted to another reality where you’d meet again, sometimes it was at a concert, other at the local café of your neighborhood that you used to love so much, but tonight was the first night where he appeared at your house. Which was funny considering that he hasn’t stepped foot in this place for almost a year.

You pushed your thoughts away as you tried to go back to sleep. And you did try, but the tossing and turning made you restless, you cursed your mind as the only thing you could see when you closed your eyes was Calum, standing at your door and asking for a kind of forgiveness you weren’t sure you could give. Although, who were you kidding?

Checking the clock once again you realized it was 20 past 6, still too early to go back to real life, but not too early to start and try to live a little.

Pushing yourself off the bed, you grabbed a big hoodie and some pair of sweatpants before putting on your running shoes and hopping into the bathroom to brush your teeth and clean your face before grabbing your keys and getting out of the house.

You sat on the driver’s seat, just like you did a thousand times, taking a big breath before starting the engine.

“You do know you have a perfectly good car in your driveway, right?”

You smiled at him and greeted him with a hug and a kiss as you climbed into the passenger's seat.

It was your usual morning routine. Ever since you met and he found out you lived nearby the studio he always volunteered to carpool with you. Since then, your mornings were filled with hugs, good coffee and stolen kisses you gave each other as the road to the studio became longer and longer thanks to all the detours you took.

“Hello, Calum. I’m very good, thank you for asking, how are you?”

Calum rolled his eyes and gave you a little peck on your lips “I would’ve been on time if I hadn’t had to pick your ass from the other side of town”

You lightly punched him in the arm “You know you love me” He smiled.

“That I do, darling. But I would love you more if you drove us from time to time”

“You know I don’t have a car!” Calum turned to you and pointed to the classic mustang sitting in front of your house, raising his eyebrows as if to ask if you were stupid “That’s my dad’s car!”

“That he kindly gave to you when he helped you move to LA so you could pursue your dream of becoming the next new sensation of music,” He said mocking a dreamy voice to try imitating you “He said it was yours, so it's yours! And honestly, it’s a pretty cool car if you ask me. A real chick magnet”

You mocked a gag at his old reference of movies from the 50’s “Sexist much?” You both laughed as he started the car and started driving “Anyways, he only gave me the car because mom was threatening to sell it on eBay if he didn’t get rid of it soon enough, so he could still come and get it whenever he wants to” You shrugged.

Calum started sniffing the air, “What?” You asked, sniffing as well in case there was something wrong.

“Do you smell that?” He asked with a concerned face.

“Smell what?”

He leaned closer to you and sniffed harder before whispering “The bullshit”

You scoffed and pushed him back “Haha very funny”

You waited until he stopped laughing, you never told him the truth, well two truths actually.

One: That you enjoyed the drives you had with him, it was a special time for the two of you to be yourselves without anyone to judge. You would laugh, sing, talk for hours as you sat in traffic under the city lights. It was the little moments that matter for the two of you, these were your little moments and you didn’t want to give them up just yet.

It was not easy being in a “relationship” that no one knew about, not even his bandmates, although you knew they were suspecting something. All the sneaking away while amid a recording session, hanging out in each other’s rooms, how adamant he was to carpool with you every day, even when he didn’t need to go to the studio… It was an easy tell, but it was also your private life.

You told yourself that it was for the best, that you shouldn’t mix work and personal life, especially when your personal life included Calum. He was adamant to keep whatever you had out of the public eye “What we have is good” He said, “Why ruin it with labels?” And you agreed, knowing that making everything official could just mess everything up. Calum was your best friend, after all, you would be damn if you lose him.

And for the second truth:

“I don’t know how to drive”

Just in time, the traffic light turned red. Calum turned to you in disbelief “Bluff” You shook your head, not looking at him just yet “Bluff! That can’t be right! Y/N how old are you?”

You shrugged again “I never needed to! I always enjoyed walking plus,” You said nudging your arm on Calum’s “I have the best driver right here!” You pecked his cheek with a kiss and saw how quickly they blushed, making you celebrate this tiny victory inside your head. You loved making him blush, it gave you some kind of security that he felt the same way.

Calum stared at you for a moment too long, making you self-conscious under his eyes. You could tell the gears were running inside his head “What if I teach you how to drive?”

You chuckled “Now I call your bluff”

“I’m serious!” He said, not taking his eyes from you “We have time before the tour starts, and that way you could drive us somewhere for once! You know? Picking me out and going on a date?”

Your eyes were set on him with an alarming tone, a what now? Was he serious? “You would do that for me?” You asked shyly, not wanting to fall into another of his pranks, but he seemed serious enough.

“Of course!” He said with a chuckle that accentuated all his dimples “Let’s get you your driver’s license, Y/N!”

Calum grabbed your hand and intertwined it with his, shaking it as a victory celebration and then placing a kiss on your knuckles. You laughed and reminded him where you were “Eyes on the road, Hood” even though the light was still red, you would rather him not noticing the red that tinted your cheeks and the loud beating of your heart.

You saw how the sun was starting to illuminate the coast as you drove by. Everything was so quiet this early in the morning and you were thankful, you needed this quiet so you could be alone with your thoughts once again. And, just like every day, that just meant you were thinking of Calum.

Could you blame him? Possibly, your friends said you should. But could you live with yourself knowing that you are holding a grudge towards someone who is probably unaware of it? Not in the slightest.

You were never official, not to the public at least, but in your heart, you knew he was the only one who could make you feel like this. He was the only one capable of making you laugh as hard as you did, cry the way that you did, and enjoy yourself to the fullest. You were your best when you were with him and now… How are you now?

Would he care?

You knew he loved you, he said so himself. The only thing you didn’t know was in what way. Did he love you like a lover? or just like a friend who he’d get to kiss and make love to from time to time?

The lump in your throat became stronger as you remember the last moments you had with him and all the promises he couldn’t keep. You tried to distract yourself, crying behind the wheel could be dangerous and you weren’t going to risk your life for him, not yet at least.

You turned on the radio in hopes that it would call your mind, at this point even the commercials would make you feel better if they made you think about anything but him.

“And now, Laurie. We have the hottest single of the year!” Said the radio host with the most cheerful tone a person could mutter this early “This up-and-coming artist debuted this single almost a month ago and it is still top of the charts in almost 34 countries all over the world!”

Now the lump in your throat came back but this time with a knot on your stomach as well. The first time you heard the song play on the radio you felt excited, after all this is why you came to LA in the first place. Yet the feeling became bittersweet in no time.

“My girls, boys, and non-binary folks; if you are in your car right now get ready to sing this at the top of your lungs with all the feelings you could muster and send a fuck you to your ex. This is ‘Driver’s License’ by Y/N L/N”

“I got my driver’s license last week, just like we always -”

You turned off the music and kept driving in silence.

You knew it was a bad idea to release the song you wrote about him. Maybe it was a petty move on your part, but… didn’t you have the right to be petty this time?

Either way is not like people would realize it was about him. It was your little secret, yours and Calum’s if he ever heard it, although you believe that if he did then he would’ve said something to you by now. Yet his silence was similar to the one in your car; deafening and heartbreaking.

“I don’t know Calum,” You said as you stared at your car parked in front of you “Is it safe to do it here?”

Calum was leaning on top of the hood, rolling his eyes at your indecision “Would you rather do it on the PCA?” You shot your eyes at him with a deathly glare, he just chuckled “I promise is okay, this parking lot is big enough and there are no cars left that you could accidentally hit”

You were both standing in the middle of the studio’s parking lot late at night. Calum insisted that this was the day you learned how to drive, so he spent the night at your place and today he drove you in your car, that way there would be no excuses left for you not to do it.

However, you were still hesitant. This was technically your father’s car, his other baby, and if you ever crash it you wouldn't know what you’ll do. Calum noticed your doubt and took a step closer to you, grabbing your hand in his to give you some sort of encouragement.

“Look, babe. It’s okay if you don’t want to do it. I won’t pressure you” He said softly “I just thought this could be fun for the both of us” He smiled “Fun and educational for that matter. But if you’re not ready then we can go home and-”

“I want to do it, Cal,” You said, “I just- I don’t know where to even begin!”

He chuckled and placed a kiss on your forehead, making all the butterflies in your stomach take flight.

“Tell you what,” Calum said confidently “You get behind the wheel and I’ll put us some inspirational music”

He walked back to the car to connect his phone to the speakers “You better put my song first!” You called after him as you walked towards the driver’s seat.

Calum laughed “God, I should’ve never told you that! Now your ego’s off the damn roof!” Soon enough he sat on the passenger’s seat next to you and buckled up.

“Not my fault that you think of me so often you want to put it into song” You teased, leaning in for a kiss that Calum was happy to oblige.

“Yes,” He said mid-kiss “It is completly your fault” Next thing you know ‘Kill My Time’ was playing on the radio, but Calum was not letting go of you just yet.

You wished this moment last forever, you wished every moment with Calum would last forever, but you both needed to breathe at some point “I wish I could kiss you all day long, I swear I could die on your lips and die happy” You said as you pressed your forehead to his, smiling like a fool in love.

“Soon, love,” Calum said as he crashed his lips against yours “Just wait until tour is over and then we’ll have forever to do just that”

You grinned at his words, a few days ago he promised to make your relationship publicly official once he came back from tour, that way you’ll have more time together as a fairly new couple. If he was willing to take that step, then you were more than ready to follow along. You knew you’d give everything for him if you had to and you still won’t regret it. You love him, and that was enough for you.

“Think I’m ready to start,” You said once you pulled away from him for the last time.

Calum nodded and patted his hand on your thigh “Okay, first you have to turn on the engine. Good, then you check all your mirrors and make sure your gear shift is on position-”

“My what?” You asked.

“Your gear shift, you know? The stick in-”

“Oh, you mean the PRNDL? You said, trying your hardest to stay serious, but failing to do so once you saw Calum’s face.

“You couldn't go one day without your references now, could you?” He said in amusing disbelief that had you both laughing.

The lesson was fairly simple, it just consisted of going forwards and on reverse a few times and practicing some turns in circles around the parking lot, and you were proud to say you were getting the hang of it pretty quickly. Calum turned out to be a great instructor with the patience of a god, he never got mad at you or showed that he was scared - even though it was pretty clear that he was, especially when you turned too far and almost hit a lamp post - and you appreciate him for that.

It was almost 2 AM when you decided to call it quits for the day and start back tomorrow. Calum was now behind the wheel driving you to your house so he could pick up his car and drive home.

“Cal?” You said once he parked in your driveway.

“Yes, love?”

“I’m really happy with you” You shyly admitted.

Calum’s heart beamed with love as he pulled you closer for a goodnight kiss “And I’m really happy with you”

You kissed him one more time before jumping out of the car “See you tomorrow!” He called before you watched him drive away.

The sound of a horn woke you up from your daydream memory. You didn’t know the light had just turned green until the car behind you started pounding their button and cursing at you to move.

You watched the white car from the rearview mirror as you drove away, it looked like his, all the white cars did, but you knew he couldn’t be here just yet, not until the tour was done.

A sinking feeling of hopelessness filled your inner thoughts once again. The promises he made faded like the wind in the summer once he stepped on that plane and decided that you were something he had to leave behind. It would’ve been good to know beforehand, that way you wouldn’t have wasted a year by the phone, hoping it would ring and that he’d be on the other line.

You glanced at the car’s clock one more time, it’s already too late to do anything, you’ve been driving around without a destination for hours when it only felt like minutes. Time is something you learn how to lose when you’re alone, minutes become meaningless once you realize there is no one there to share them with you, but it’s late and it was time to head home. You let out a sigh at the realization that your drive-through therapy didn’t work this time.

Deciding to take the long way home, you started to drive through the lesser-known streets of LA, hoping that you’d get lost somewhere and not knowing if anyone would care.

The dreams of running away came flashing down, more of an idea than an afterthought. Yes, you made it in LA, you have a hit song and your dreams are coming true. Why didn’t that feel like enough?

If you were gone, even just for a little bit, would anybody notice? If you just got up in your car and started driving somewhere unknown until the feeling of loneliness faded away. Could you drive your feelings away? Outrun them somehow?

You knew that if Calum could do it then so could you. It was so easy for him to just leave whatever you had behind, to leave you behind and hope that you were okay somehow. If he thought that you were okay then he maybe didn’t know you at all and you are probably better off without him, just like your friends say all the time.

But were you better off without him?

Tears started piling up in the corner of your eyes once again. No, you were not better off without him even though you want to be. And neither you are better off with him, if he ever came back to you, that is.

You swallowed a sob, trying your hardest not to break down again. It was useless, all the tears and all the songs and all the fuck him an attitude that you could muster… What was it for if not to dwell on your pain even more? You are still hurt and he still did not care.

You took a turn on the left, knowing the way like the back of your hand. You knew this path would lead you home, but you also knew it would lead you to his house as well.

The first time you did this was to practice how to find your way to Calum’s home without getting lost. You knew he wasn’t home and he wouldn’t be for many many months, but you wanted to surprise him once he got there, to pick him up and drive him to that date he promised you once he returned. Now, you avoided that road like a plague unless you had days like this, days in which missing him became everything you did, and now passing through his empty house gave you the reality check you desperately needed: He is gone. It also inspired you to write the song, it was a blessing and a curse.

You turned into the familiar street and looked to your right, you counted the houses passing by one, two, three, four… Until you spotted his old porch. Normally, that’s all you did. You would drive through his street and see the house dark and cold as his owner was out of town. But today there was a white car on his driveway.

Your breath got caught in your throat as you recognized the license plate, immediately stepping on the breaks and making the car stopped abruptly in front of the house.

That is his car… But how? You knew that Calum kept his car in Ashton’s place so they could drive up together to the airport every time they had to leave. What is it doing here? Tour didn’t end until a week from today and-

The sudden movement coming from the house pulled you from every rational thought as the front door opened. You held your breath as the person who stole all your sleepless nights came into view.

He was home.

Calum stepped out of his house with a bright smile on his face. His hair was shorter than the last time you’ve seen it, and he was less tanned, a fact that was easily noticeable thanks to the contrast of his leather jacket on his skin. But his dimples were intact as he smiled at whoever was inside the house.

A small figure came behind him, wrapping her arms around his torso as she was laughing at something he said. Her blond hair was falling down her back so elegantly, and her smile was bright as day as she hugged him, you wouldn’t have noticed that in the photos. She looked happy, but what broke you the most is that he looked happy as well.

He was home, but he was home with her.

You knew something was going on, even if there wasn’t anything official from either of them. You weren’t official, too. But seeing them was all the proof you needed to believe it. Believe that it was actually over and neither of you said goodbye.

You bit the inside of your cheek as silent tears started rolling down your face. You wanted to scream, to cry your hearts out, and let the world fuck itself over and over again. But for the love that you had on yourself, you promised that you wouldn't dignify him by making a scene. He didn’t deserve it. He didn’t deserve to know you cared.

With that in mind, you wiped your tears and floored the gas pedal, driving away from the scene.

“Hey!!!!!”

“Guess what?”

“I PASSED THE TEST!”

“I can legally drive on my own now :D!”

Read 19:05

“Calum?”

“Oh, you must be at the concert now, my bad!”

“Let me know when we can FaceTime again! I can’t wait to tell you how it went! I’m so excited we can finally switch places and let me be the one in charge of the road, lol”

Read 23:54

“Is everything alright, Cal?”

Read 04:32

“I miss you”

Read July 19th 14:49

Last week you sent your last text to him and he still hadn’t responded yet. You tossed all night waiting for at least a smoke signal from him. He was gone for two months now and he never missed one of your calls, it was so unlike him, especially when he promised you to call every day he was on tour.

You tried to distract yourself by doing everything you could think of. You watched videos, listened to music, played candy crush over and over again, and still, there was no answer.

You were starting to give up when a notification from Twitter graced your screen, it read: “Calum Hood, bassist from the band 5 Seconds of Summer, seen cozying up with a mysterious girl in a nightclub two nights ago”

You blinked twice and reread the headline, hoping that your eyes were deceiving you.

“The Australian bassist seemed to be catching up with some friends and letting it all loose at a wild night here in London after their sold-out show in the O2 Arena.

Hood was wearing-”

You skipped all that unnecessary information, scrolling down to the bottom where you knew all media kept the real gossip. A bubble of anxiety started forming inside your throat, as your fingers moved over the screen. The atmosphere became heavy while you could hear your heart thundering inside your chest, every little beat it made was hurting you, almost like it was banging your ribcages begging to be set free.

Time stood still as you looked at the pictures, not wanting to believe your eyes as they analyzed every detail of it.

There he was, hugging a blond woman from behind and resting his face on her shoulders just like he used to do with you. Even from the picture, you could tell she was gorgeous. The next picture showed her wrapping her arms around his neck and smiling at him. He had his hands cupping her cheeks, his face denoted a serious expression, but the look in his eyes was fixed on her.

He kissed her in the third picture, his hands still cupping her cheeks. It seemed like he was smiling through the kiss.

The last picture had them sitting on some kind of leather sofa. She was sitting on his lap and his hands were wandering very close to her butt, holding her close to him.

“The fans of the band wasted no time on identifying the mysterious girl. She seems to be the new tour assistant manager of the boys. Let’s hope that work and pleasure don’t get between this beautiful couple #goals<3”

The stream of tears was never-ending. You couldn’t understand what was going on, why Calum hasn’t said anything to you, why-why did he let it happen? Something was not right, and it wasn’t just your breathing getting heavy inside your lungs or your shaky hands as you typed the next text.

“We need to talk, please call me?”

You got no answers that night as you cried yourself to sleep, realizing that you had no one to comfort you cause nobody knew that you two were even together. You were utterly alone.

The next morning you woke up to no text from him, not even a call or a voicemail.

Read 08:45

You forced yourself to finish your nighttime routine. Ever since you came back home you did nothing but cry, but not of sadness, you were crying of anger.

With him being far away it almost didn’t seem real. You allowed yourself to create some sort of fantasy where he would come back to you, to start over where you left off and be together for everyone to see. How foolish.

You thought that he’ll hear your song and he’ll be running back to you to apologize, to ask if you still love him like before. But he won’t, because he is happy without you while you rot in your own pity party.

You grabbed hold onto the counter, trying to hold the tears as everything suddenly became clear as day. All the red flags you ignored were now shining as candy apples. He made a fool of you and didn’t even dignify you with at least some kind of warning or apology. He brought you down and now it was up to you to climb back up and even higher than before.

How could he?

All the memories you held close to your heart were burning in the pyre of your soul. You loved him, you knew you did. But all you meant for him was just a summer fling, something to waste time on before the real thing came along.

But he loved you…

Did he?

He spent entire days and nights next to you. He told you stories no one’s ever heard of. He sang to you to sleep and wrote you the most beautiful poems you’ve ever read. He picked you up every day and stayed with you until it was your time to leave. He made you feel welcome and there was not a day where you didn’t feel safe around his arms. He was your best friend. He taught you how to drive and what it meant to feel something real, something as important as the love you could have for someone. He loved you, he said he did, he promised he did.

Maybe love was not enough for him.

Your mind was divided, fighting over and over and over again about the same thing. Part of you cursed his name while the other part just wanted to be held by him, telling you that it will all be okay. But you couldn't even trust yourself on this one.

The doorbell rang, one, two, three times.

You were not going to answer it. One look in the mirror and you knew you couldn't answer anyone in this state. Your eyes were puffy and red, your cheeks were hollowed from not eating all day. There was nothing you could do to make you look or feel better, so whoever was behind the door will have to find another way to disturb the chaos in your mind.

However, they were persistent. With the ring of the doorbell came a few bangs. It seemed urgent.

You took one last look at yourself before deciding with a sigh to go and open the door. Whoever it was must have a good reason to come banging at your door a little past midnight.

“I’m coming!” You called, voice coming out a little hoarse from crying all night.

A shiver ran down your back and you felt like you were here before, in this exact moment where all your instincts told you to walk away. You decided to ignore them as you gently turned the doorknob and opened the door. Immediately wishing you didn’t.

“Calum?”

He stood in front of you, soaked from head to toe. Hands in the pockets of his jacket, not the leather one, but one more cozy. He was also wearing a pair of sweatpants and part of his hair was stuck on his forehead. You didn’t realize it was raining.

“Can I come in?” He asked, not even a hello.

You debated on whether or not to let him in. Part of you wanted to throw him back into the streets, but a storm was coming - much in the literal and subliminal way, and you didn’t want him to drive in this weather, you still care for him even though you shouldn’t.

With a simple nod, you opened the door wide enough so he could enter the house, a little “thank you” came out of his mouth as he stepped inside for the first time in over a year.

You closed the door and started walking into the kitchen with Calum following you like a stray dog. Your hands were shaking so you hid them behind your back as you slowly wrapped your arms around you in an attempt to comfort you throughout this whole ordeal.

Calum is standing in front of you on the other side of the island. He is not looking at you, but rather he is looking at his feet. You figured he was too scared to be the first one to talk and it broke your heart that he has suddenly become shy around you when you used to tell each other everything. ‘But whose fault is that?’ You thought.

Now you were just two strangers in a room.

“I thought you’d still be on tour,” You said, breaking the silence that has fallen upon you.

Calum looked up and he almost looked thankful that you spoke first “The last two venues canceled at the last minute due to weather conditions,” He said “So we came back earlier than expected”

You nodded and faced the other way. The fact that he was here in your home made your stomach turn and not in a good way. You always thought him coming back was going to be something joyful, but it became more painful as time went by.

“They closed café Mariannete while I was gone” He said, was he really going to talk about that right now? Did he came over here to reminisce about the café you used to have breakfast in?

“I didn’t know. I don’t go there anymore”

More awkward silence came upon you. You both knew he was bullshiting his way into the real conversation he was avoiding to have. He always used to do that and you have forgotten how much you hated it.

“Were you driving by my house today?” He asked and you froze on the spot. You didn’t think that he saw you.

“I was,” You cleared your throat “I was coming back home”

“And you didn’t say hello” It was more a statement than a question.

A sour taste filled your mouth. How dare he? “You were busy enough” You knew it was a petty answer, but what did he expect?

A flash of hurt came through Calum’s eyes as he said nothing in return. He knew you saw him with her, so he had no excuse to push the topic back to you.

The atmosphere was tense as the only thing you could hear was the ticking of the clock and the raindrops falling through your window. There was so much to say and yet none of you were brave enough to muster them.

You had every right to be mad and he had a right to explain himself, but you were not going to be the first one to cave in. Not without hearing from him first.

Eventually, Calum got restless of the silence.

“Your song is amazing,” He said, pleading for an answer that didn’t contain poison in your words “Ashton showed it to us the day it came out”

So he has heard it, you didn’t know if you should be proud or ashamed “Thanks”

“I forgot to congratulate you on your number one”

“You forgot to do a lot of things”

If there was ever a moment where you could give him the chance to redeem himself, this was it.

You saw how Calum shifted his weight from foot to foot, he had his lips pressed in a thin line and you could see how his eyes changed and fell into a deep pit of regret as tears were forming in the corner of his eye.

“I know the song’s about me-” He said.

“How did you figure that out?” You said sarcastically.

“Y/N…” He pleaded, running a hand through his face, but you were having none of that.

“Why did you do it, Calum?”

You needed an answer, something you could hold onto to eventually let go. Calum, however, was almost speechless.

The ticking of the clock became even louder as you counted the seconds until he spoke again. One, two, three…

Ten “I don’t know”

The answer cut right through you as you let a stream of tears roll down your cheek, not lifting your head to look at him in the eyes. It wasn’t what you expected, it was way worse.

Calum noticed your crying and started panicking, spilling every thought he had through his mouth “I-I don’t- I was drunk and she was there with our groups of friends and we were too drunk to even take notice of what was happening and we just kissed and- Y/N, I’m not perfect. We weren’t perfect, we weren’t even official and it was only a kiss and I thought it would be okay but then the tabloids and your message and I just- And she’s a great friend, she didn’t mean any harm but things happened and-” He stammered, unable to connect his thoughts as he desperately tried to fix something so you would stop crying.

“For me it was perfect” You cried “We were perfect in my mind, you made it perfect. God, Calum. Why didn’t you tell me? I spent months in agony trying to figure it out, to make it make sense! I beat myself up over and over again and there you were having the time of your life with a stranger!” Your voice was loud, not enough to yell, but enough to make it clear that you were fuming.

“What are you talking about?!” Calum said matching the tone of your voice “I missed you every fucking day but there was nothing I could do about it! You don’t know shit of what you’re talking about!”

You scoffed “Oh yeah! It surely seemed like you missed me! You never called me once, Calum. Not even to apologize and try to make it better”

“I didn’t know how!” He said, “I was scared that-”

“That I’d hate you?”

“That you’d forgive me,” Calum said in one breath, making you stare in shock “I-I didn’t want you to forgive me, Y/N, cause you deserve so much better. On tour I realized that I wasn’t ready for a relationship, no matter how much you mean to me and I didn’t know how to tell you that so-”

“And are you ready now? That’s why you are with her?” You interrupted, head filled with anger to even think straight.

“I’m not ready to be with either of you!”

The room felt silent once again.

You had no answer to that and you weren’t sure you wanted to hear more from him.

The rain outside your window started to calm down, only droplets of water were left as the memory of the storm that almost was.

Your legs gave out a minute later, sliding you down slowly onto the floor. Calum walked up to you and sat next to you, neither of you saying anything for what it seemed like hours.

“You said you loved me…” You said with a faint voice.

Calum sighed “I did. I do”

“And you love her too?”

He thought about it “I don’t know. I might” You closed your eyes as a tear fell down your cheek “She’s good to me, Y/N. And we really got close but-”

“I know,” You said with a soft sniffle “We weren’t perfect either”

“You do know I love you, right?” He said softly, turning his face towards you “And that everything we had was real. Every minute of it, every word in every song was true and it still is. All was real and it’s still there somewhere. I still want you in my life, Y/N, cause you make it better. I just,” He sighed “I need to figure my shit out”

“Yeah, you do” You said, making him chuckle darkly “But I can’t promise I’ll be here”

“I wouldn’t ask you to”

You sat there in silence for a few more moments, just enjoying each other's company before everything fades away.

“I love you, too” You said in a whisper, hoping that he won’t hear “I still fucking love you”

Calum sighed “I know”

“Guess that you didn’t mean what you wrote on that song about me

‘Cause you said forever now I drive alone past your street”

.

Tags: @iknowyouthinkimbulletproof @mystic-232 @talksoprettyjjx @theshyspy @sarcasticallywitty15 @hoodhoran @flaneurcth h @notinthesameguey @myloverboyash @yeah-and69 @fckingpernico

* if your url is crossed please reach out to me so we can fix it

[agentem]

I don’t know how much people care about my personal life on here. I am back from two weeks in Mexico. Got to do Día de los Muertos in Mexico, so that was cool. And I saw a ton of ruins and Mayan stuff.

I know you might think I went because of Talokan and Wakanda Forever coming out. That’s just a coincidence. I have wanted to go for awhile. We actually had a small Maya unit in my public US middle school. We had done “Voyage of the Mimi” (which is a weird 90s educational program starring young Ben Affleck, who my class mocked mercilessly). The first one is about whales and the second one is about the Maya, if I recall correctly. Mostly what I knew was they had cool pyramids and knew astronomical stuff.

I also read a book about Hernan Cortes and the conquest of the Aztecs that made me profoundly sad.

So yeah, I was interested but didn’t know much about the history itself. In fact, I discovered I was mixing up Tenochitlan (the Aztec Capitol, now Mexico City’s Centro, especially the Cathedral which is where the original pyramid was) and Teotihuacán (vast ruins outside of Mexico City proper) which made me feel dumb.

Teotihuacán is so BIG. I can’t express it really. We were there for half a day with a guide and we didn’t get to see half of it. These ruins are interesting because they are not quite sure which civilization built here originally. People kept living there well into the time of the Aztecs—when the Spanish arrived—so it’s kind of a place where cultures mix. So much stuff! Biiig.

We climbed the pyramid at Cholula. This is another one the Spanish gutted. They put a church, which is still there, at the top. There is some excavation going on around it. But mostly it’s a very high church and I did not enjoy how much I had to walk up. I am not good at inclines.

We also saw Mitla, which was a Zapotec site, but didn’t have a guide so I didn’t learn as much as I would’ve liked. We did meet a nice, elderly Zapotec man who showed us some weaving though. So that was cool.

Then we hauled our butts to Palenque, our first official Mayan site. It is FAR from anything. But we got a guide to take us hiking is the jungle around it first, to show us how much more there was left to uncover. He found a tiny obsidian blade and a shard of pottery while we hiked, and just put them in a little baggie full of other artifacts he had found, like it was NBD. Palenque was the one site that left me with the sense that more was waiting to be found. Unlike Teotihuacán and many of the other sites, the Palenque site was not in use after the fall of its civilization and the local people did NOT know it was there. So they have made cool discoveries of two tombs which were undisturbed. And the masks they wore were so cool. They also let us climb the pyramids (I only went up one because I don’t like climbing, as I said)

Only 2% of what LIDAR shows has been excavated. I really want them to keep digging! Am like ready to lend a hand if anyone knows about archaeology.

Next, we went to Uxmal, which is great if you want to see detailed carvings and artwork of the Maya. It’s quite intricate, and many other sites the stones weren’t in good condition even if they were still there. (Again, most of these structures may have collapsed or had vegetation growing on them, but the locals knew they were there. People had been in and out so there was often human damage.) It gave me more of a sense of what stuff would have looked like.

Then Chichen Itza, one of the Seven Wonders of the modern world. Boy was it crowded. I joked to my sister that it was the only dig site with a Starbucks (joke’s on me though because Tulum had one too). I mean, the Castillo is very beautiful and big. There are also some smaller structures that have some good detailed reliefs, but not as many as Uxmal.

Finallu Tulum, the only Mayan site by the ocean. Very beautiful setting but also very crowded, especially considering this one is so much smaller than the others. The lookout structures (the “lighthouse”) were worth seeing because no where else has that, but everything else is relatively small and without .

One thing that is now confusing me about BP is that in the trailer M’Baku says Namor is called Ku’kulkan but they also call the country Talokan. Ku’kulkan is the Mayan feathered serpent god (Quetzalcoatl in the north). But then the city is Talokan, for Tlaloc (Chaac in the South). So which culture are they pulling from? Mexica or Mayan?

[unholyplumpprincess]

Behave

Wanted to write for Eivor desperately bc I love her. Also ty to @mika-aris for being my cheerleader during this!!!

!!!Minors please do not Like or Reblog as this is an adult work, please respect my boundaries!!!

Reblogs > Likes. Please Reblog if you hit Like- and plz do not look respectfully, leaving horny tags fuels me!

Summary: You and Eivor have always had a flirtatious relationship, resulting in many close encounters. As a hunter, you go on trips to feed the settlement, recruiting warriors to come with you. When you offer to Eivor, she offers a counter of a trade. Private lessons to teach you how to fight, and in return she will give you company. What a shock she's in for when you show her you know damned well how to fight- and how to pin a big girl like her. Or. In which you pin Eivor in a spar match and she's Very horny about it.

Fandom: Assassin’s Creed Valhalla

Relationship: Eivor/Reader

Warnings: R18+/NSFT, Eivor is genderfluid and fem presenting atm, Eivor has a penis, Reader is gender neutral and genitalia is ambiguous so all can enjoy, No penetration or anything just dry/clothed humping

Words: 4k

__________

You would always rather be the hunter than the prey. 

You were the hunter of your settlement inside the Raven Clan. Working alongside Petra and Wallace to ensure your entire settlement had the meat necessary for the feasts that were held often. The cattle could only birth so quickly, and the game within the forest could only be hunted so often before they, too, would deplete. Petra and Wallace stuck more to your island and its surroundings, while you preferred to venture off. 

This normally resulted in you recruiting a few others to tag along, not to help with the hunt, but to help with the load you would return with. The furs were turned to furs for beds, the bones turned to weapons or arrow tips. Nothing ever went to waste. 

The others you would recruit were simply to help cart back or boat back the hunts and to set up camp. And, of course, to provide intimidating company. You did not look to be a warrior yourself; You knew this. You did not have the rugged scarring of the others, or how they swung heavy axes over their shoulders and walked with swagger. But you were deadly with a bow, even deadlier with a blade in your hand. Silent, never startling your prey.

~Rest under the cut~

The only one who could hear you was the beloved Wolf-Kissed. Someone you had admired since back in your last settlement. Her braided red hair, all her tattoos, her crooked smile and the cocky prowess in her step. Or how she played with the little ones, chasing them in all her huge glory and her cloak making her appear all the larger. 

You were close enough with the Jarl’s right hand. Enough that Eivor would seek you out, not just for questions or archery tips, but just to sit with you. Like when you were sharpening blades outside in the nice weather, how you’d heard her stalking up to you. She’d make conversation, her eyes watching you sharpen the blade and you looking up at her from under your lashes. 

“Skilled hands.” She’d tell you, watching how you’d spin the knife in your grip with just your fingers. 

You’d smile back up at her, sweet as could be. “Is it the skill that captures your attention, Wolf-Kissed? Or is it the implications beneath said skill that does?” Before you’d flip the knife in your grasp with a little toss and hold the hilt out to her. Always delighting in the smirk on her lips and her dark green eyes looking you up. 

“A question I am sure you would like the answer to, hunter.” She’d tease back, taking the blade from you with her calloused fingers brushing your hand. 

The flirting was heavy between you two. You suspected she merely had a strong sexual appetite, something you could satisfy. Yet, she never acted. An eternal tease. 

Whether she was denying herself for the sake of denial. Or if she truly just had a flirtatious, friendly relationship with you was a question you never thought you’d get an answer to. 

The question that leads to your answer is one asked in the longhouse. 

A feast is going on at the time. Warriors and civilians alike enjoy the night of boosting morale. Someone is singing, someone is playing a lyre, another is telling tales of their battles and memories of the gods aiding them in said battles. Little ones are delighted by all, running about and through legs and giggling up a storm as they chase Mouse around. The large, white, domesticated wolf that seemed keen on staying in Eivor’s room lest it was to play with the children. 

You’re sitting in your own corner on a wooden box, your feet propped up and one leg over the other. You work on your whittling project, carefully carving the raven’s wings with each painstaking feather. You like the noise around you, your own plate of food and mead long since downed. Your journal to your other side, containing details of where you were to hunt next. A rough sketch of a map and location you wanted to go to, and who pledged to help. 

“Not enjoying yourself?” Comes that low, raspy voice in its forever tease. You peek up through your lashes to see Eivor approaching, a sway to her hip. Like a prowling wolf. 

“On the contrary, I am. I like when it gets loud.” You tease back on your last words, flashing her a smile and enjoying the way her eyes narrow in challenge.  

You move, sitting upright and kicking the box over to her that you had been using for your legs. Eivor bows her head politely, taking the seat offered and swinging her cup back to drink her last of mead before setting it to the side. 

“You are recruiting for your next hunt?” She hums to you, glancing over to your journal. You follow her gaze briefly before returning your eye down to the tedious task of carefully carving out feathers. 

“Yes...Why? Are you interested in attending this time?” You speak as you lift the charm in your hand, twisting it about in the light to get a good look at it. You draw it back to your lap when satisfied, looking towards her with a cocked head. “Or do the gods call you out once more, no time for play?” 

Eivor’s sparkle in her eye returns at your playfulness and you like the look she gives you. That slow glance down to your lips, down your neck and body. She gives you a once over, a hum to her throat and leaning back against the wall with crossed arms as she does it. Making herself appear bigger, broader than she already is. A tone of amusement in her voice when she speaks. “Play time is what you call it?” 

“Thought pups like you would call it that. Free to run and wrestle with who you please.” You struggle not to smirk at calling her a pup. Watching her eyes narrow but seeing a slight darken to her cheeks. 

Oh? Perhaps the Wolf-Kissed had something you could dig your teeth into. 

After a moment, you press again. “Are you interested in joining? You would not hunt. I merely request aid in bringing my boon back to camp. Just some muscle and company with a pretty face.” 

“Perhaps. If you would accept a trade.” Eivor replies smoothly, her eyes sweeping you over and making you pause at what she might be implying. You lick your lips, suddenly much more interested in her than your project. You set it in your lap, giving her your full attention and cocking your head to glance her over. 

“Loki kisses your gaze this evening,” You speak with a narrow of your gaze at the smirk playing on her lips. The sparkle in her eye. Gods- any that would hear you- she is deathly beautiful. “But, I shall bite. What limb must I give up to relish in your company, o’ Wolf-Kissed?” 

“You would give a limb for my company, hunter?” It’s spoken as a jest, a light tease. A grin now reaching the apples of her cheeks, her sharp canines on display. 

Gods help you, you wanted her to sink her teeth into your flesh. 

“And you would give up your important duty of establishing alliances just to help me drag back prey,” You quip back quickly, leaning on your knees now so you can lean forward towards her. Your heart stutters when her eyes fall to your lips, but you mock obliviousness. “Seems we are on equal footing of desiring company.” 

There’s a moment of pause where Eivor just looks at you. Her tongue flicking across her lips and a smile playing on her lips. She pushes from the wall, leaning on her own knees. Close enough to you that you can feel her breath when she speaks. 

“I am told that you fight well with a dagger and bow. That your skills put down wild animals with ease- no matter the size. And yet, those around worry you do not know how to fight without your tools.” She speaks quiet, like it was just for you two to hear. You hold back a smile, biting your tongue as you realize where this is going. “Private lessons. I want to train you. Make sure you can hold your own in a fight if you lose your weaponry.” 

“And since when do you believe the local gossip, Eivor?” You murmur, pushing your luck by shifting a bit to lean the tiniest bit closer. Relishing in the way you can hear her breath still, how you watch her pupils dilate for more reasons than just the candlelit hall.  

“I accept your trade,” You say, leaning back and stretching your arms above your head to work out kinks from sitting there for so long. You pretend you do not see the way Eivor’s eyes sweep your frame. A hungry wolf. “When shall we begin this ‘training’ I seem to oh so desperately need?” 

“Tomorrow at dawn. Meet me at the nearby clearing.” She speaks as she moves to stand. You watch her, your eyes following her just as hungry and noting the sway in her step. Even as she joins the others and gets rowdy with them. Slaps on the back or grasping someone’s nape and fondly bumping their heads together.  

You sigh quietly to yourself when your heart flutters. Letting a breath out you didn’t know you had been holding. You’d...always wanted an excuse to get closer to her. Something more meaningful than just conversations. To be able to touch her in some form or another. 

Regardless. You were quite looking forward to seeing Eivor’s face when she realized that you weren’t just some hunter. You knew how to fight, and you did it well. You were ready to protect the settlement and use whatever was on hand. Yes, you fought better with your weaponry. But that doesn’t mean you didn’t know how to knock someone on their ass and the get the upper hand. 

The bigger they are... 

You enjoy the rest of the feast with a feeling of eyes following you. Whenever you casually glance over you can see how her eyes follow you, peeking over her horn with her lips quirking into smirk. 

You wanted to wipe that look right off her face. 

That night, you sleep well. Rising early in the morning like you always did to get a good start of the day. You go through your morning routine of waking Petra and Wallace, which goes about as well as every morning. With both of them grumbling at you and Petra’s hand waving you away. You set about setting everything out for them to remind them of the stuffing of a few heads to be done today before leaving a note saying you’ll be out for the day. 

The clearing was a ten-minute ride on horseback. Your beloved mare, Daffodil Violet Glenda Charolette the First, or merely Daffy for short, carried you there. All the while you lovingly chatted to her about what a good girl she was. Even doing so as you hopped off once you reached the tree line where you’d have to do the rest on foot. Tying her up and patting her side as she nosed at you in a little push. “Yeah, yeah, I’m going. You make a massacre of these flowers- know they’re your favorite, big girl.” 

The walk from there is just a few minutes. You know you’re close when you hear the stream nearby. The break in the tree line revealing a near perfect circle of clearing. Beautiful little yellow and purple flowers in bloom among the wild flowers and grass. Butterflies fluttered about, the warm sun casting a beautiful glow on the world as it raised above the trees to shine its light onto the world. 

In the middle of the clearing was Eivor. Already setting a fur up to the side and deerskins that you assumed were full of water. She shrugs out of her heavy fur and armor, setting that beside the fur. Her weaponry follows, axe and shield lain down cautiously. 

“If I did not know any better, I would assume you were trying to court me.” You speak teasingly as you approach, watching her lift her head to look at you with a sparkle in her eyes. “What? No flowers?” 

“I did not take you as the type to want flowers.” Eivor chuckles softly, standing to greet you. She towers over you when you approach, before she bends down to pluck a wildflower from the ground. Tucking it behind your ear when you are close enough and making your cheeks burn. “Forgive me. I shall remember for next time.” 

You scoff at her, despite your heart’s pounding and your face burning. You lightly shove her, laughing when she catches your arm to tug you closer, leaning down towards your face. A form of intimidation, despite her grin. Her eyes looking down towards your lips... 

You lightly bump your forehead to hers. Just hard enough to hurt to make her let you go before you move away from her. Getting some distance before she can grab you again. It’s worth the headache you’d have later just to see her bewildered expression. Going from startled, shocked, to impressed when Eivor offers you a crooked grin. “So. You do know how to fight. This makes things more fun.” 

“As I told you before, O’ Wolf-Kissed,” Your voice coming low and teasing as you shed yourself of your cloak to give yourself more freedom. “Do not listen to gossip.” 

Eivor is bigger than you, broader. She towers over you. It would be foolish to charge her, even while she’s taken off guard. It would be like hitting a wall. Instead, you stalk around her, letting her eyes watch your every move. You feel like you do when you are hunting, seeing a great bear ready for your dagger to swiftly end its life. 

But there are no weapons here. Only bare hands and violence. 

Eivor’s weakness, as you know, is she is not a patient woman. Seen when her fingers twitch, starting to growl at you when you don’t immediately attack her first. She charges you when you come in front of her, and you assume she expects her sheer size to take you out like a raging bull. You wait to feel the wind brush you to signal her closeness, quickly moving to the side and sweeping out your leg, forcing her to trip over your calf. 

“Oldest trick in the book, Eivor, come on.” You tease. Only to yelp when she grabs your ankle and yanks you down onto the ground. You both laugh as you roll quickly, moving too quick for her to yank you into her grasp. 

Her size and strength should have had you down before you could blink. But the gossip seemed to forget that though you did not raise your blade to man, you knew how to get your grasp out of a raging bear or wolf. And your dearest Wolf-Kissed looking at you with a snarl and laughter in her voice as she lungs for you was no different. 

You two go tumbling on the ground, ending up being locked in a grasp where you can keep slipping just out of her grip. Until she becomes too impatient, losing her sense when you keep slipping. It leaves her open, vulnerable. 

You strike then. 

You force your weight forward to knock against her, hitting your knee into her stomach to make her gasp sharply as her air is knocked from her. It gives you enough time to use her own unbalanced weight against her, knocking her onto her back and climbing quickly on top of her. Straddling her stomach and slamming your knees into her hands to keep them underneath you and at her sides, knowing your leg power was much better than your upper body. You slam both your hands on either side of her head in the grass to keep your balance, caging her. 

You’re both panting. Your breath mingling and your shadow casting over her. It doesn’t stop the sun from reaching her, kissing her tanned flesh. Her cheeks are flushed from exertion, her red hair sprawled around her and giving her the image of a lion. Her gaze is half lidded, her lips parted with each breath and her eyes flickering downwards towards your lips. 

“Caught you.” You huff out, trying to ignore the feeling in your stomach at her gaze. Hungry, wanting, with a subtle tilt of her head back. It lets you see the glow of sweat clinging to her, and your mouth waters with the need to taste the salt of her skin. 

“So you have.” She murmurs, her tone soft and low. It does no favors for how you feel right now. “And what do you plan to do with your caught prey?” Her tone is even lower, that damned smirk playing on her lips. She could fling you off if she wanted to. She was strong enough to. She’s not even struggling.  

“That depends,” You murmur, leaning a bit closer to gauge her reaction. And judging by how she tips her head, her lashes fluttering and her lips parting, you take these all as good signs. You lean closer, close enough your noses brush and you can see her sun kissed freckles and her vivid green irises. “How long will you let me pretend you are prey?” 

“As long as you are atop me? I cannot see myself anywhere else today.” She says a bit too breathily to just be exertion. 

You don’t hesitate to lean forward the rest of the way to press your lips to hers. Eivor meets you with hunger, her hands finally working their way out from under your knees to reach up and cup your face. Your heart stutters, her calloused thumbs brushing against your cheeks as you reach to cup the side of her neck. 

She tastes like berries from this morning, sweet and tart against your tongue. You moan into her mouth, parting your lips and matching her pace as you lick your way into her mouth. She mimics your sound, low and guttural in her throat with one of her hands falling from your cheek to grip onto the nape of your neck instead. 

Eivor’s sighs into your mouth make you shudder at how pliant she’s being. When the kiss is broken, you don’t restrain yourself from kissing down from her mouth, over her cheek, down to her jawline where she willingly tilts her head for you. Allowing you to sink your teeth lightly into the tattooed flesh there and tracing downwards with your tongue.  

Her moan when you sink your teeth into her neck makes your head spin. How her hands slide down your back, over the curves of your side to grip your hips and dragging them downwards. You don’t stop her, letting her hands guide you down from straddling her abdomen to instead her hips. The weight of your ass pressing against her. 

Eivor groans low in her throat, and you move from her neck to kiss her again. Letting her hands guide your hips back and forth, grinding against her and feeling your body tremble with the heat coursing through you. Feeling that vague hardness under your body, slotting directly against you. Vaguely hidden by the thickness of both of your pairs of clothing. 

“Eivor-” You moan as you part the kiss from her. Her hands only grip you harder, her hips starting to come up into you every time she jerks you forward. Hard enough that you can spread your legs a bit more across the broadness of her hips and feeling the friction with her. 

You bite your lip, letting your body fall forward so you can rest your face in her neck. Your arms keep you propped up on your forearms, your fingers sinking into her hair to pull on it. Eivor growls in your ear, turning her head to press her lips to your temple and starting to murmur things to you as her hips come up against you. Like she’s trying to fuck you through your clothes. 

Her deep voice makes you dizzy all the while she murmurs, ‘There you are, I have you.’ ‘Wish these clothes were not upon our bodies.’ ‘Want to taste you, want to make you cum-’ ‘Ambrosia will not taste nearly as good as I know you shall taste.’ 

There’s a wet patch on the front of your clothes as your eyebrows knit and you cling to her. Panting as you feel the fluttering in your abdomen, your hips starting to move in time with her tugs until you’re practically humping her. 

You yelp as you’re rolled over, Eivor’s body like that of a bear in how it can cover yours easily. Her forearm presses into the ground beside your head to keep herself up, her other hand gripping your hip to force you to tilt them upwards so her own can hump against you. Like this, she can get deeper strokes, feeling the muscles in her body flexing when you reach up to loop your arms around her neck and dig your fingers into her hair. 

You cum first, a cry from your lips that is quickly silenced when the hand by your head comes over your mouth. You moan into her hand frantically, your hands moving to grip her wrist as your eyes roll into the back of your head and you’re cumming in your clothes. Your hips stuttering upwards into her frantic, harsh humps against you until she’s snarling like a wolf. Her features scrunching up, eyebrows knitting as her hips stutter and she’s cumming with you. 

You can feel the wetness against the front of her pants, pressed flush against you and allowing you to feel the hard outline of her through her clothes. 

You’re both panting. Eivor moves to press her forehead to yours, her eyes closed while you peek at her through your lidded eyes. It’s quiet, a shared moment between you two until you break it with a small laugh. “You did not actually believe I needed training, did you, Eivor?” You say it accusingly, watching the way her lips quirk into a smile that she hides by turning her face to press into your neck. 

“By the gods- private lessons my arse.” You laugh breathily, the dull thrumming of your heartbeat still felt in your body. You can hear her chuckling into your neck, a kiss pressed there that makes your heart flutter a bit harder. You truly did love her. 

“Private lessons in trade for my company on your hunt,” Eivor murmurs, a reminder of the trade as she kisses up to your ear to nip it. No better than a grinning pup as she speaks low into your ear. “Perhaps you do need training. Shall your silver tongue work better elsewhere than just speaking insults towards me?” 

You flush red, shoving at her and taking advantage of her weakened state to roll her back over. You wrap a hand loose around her neck, straddling her hips and delighting in how she looks at you so hungrily. A wolfish grin upon her lips as you huff, “If anyone needs ‘training’, it is you. Shall I teach you to behave like a good pup, o’ Wolf-Kissed?” 

You delight in the way she bites her lip. How Eivor groans low in her throat like the idea of being made to submit under you was the goal all along. 

You put pressure on her throat, delighting in the shocked, aroused look crossing her features when you growl out low. “I was not made to obey. But you, Eivor? I shall teach you to heel.” 

And oh, you would make this puppy howl.