#and I am FULLY NOT OKAY WITH THE FACT THAT HE WAS KILLED BY REN.. oh my goodness i am not okay with that ;-;

[mdhwrites]

Can you elaborate on your comment on Discord that "[TOH characters in general] get a lot of backstory but little connects with their present character"?

*looks at every Hunter fan out there* How do we feel about the fact that this kid was literally raised to kill wild witches and be the Golden Guard but the only fighters in the main cast who are worse than him are the literal child and the illusionist?

Hunter is easily the most obviously egregious one but also the one that actually has a potential magical slide. After all, we don't actually know if Hunter has been alive for sixteen years. He potentially could have been alive for probably only five, thus making it so he has time to be trained and indoctrinated but was also 'old' enough to be easier to handle, left alone, etc. like that. Of course... That doesn't really fix the larger problem with Hunter's backstory versus his present day character, is it?

See, this is how I would breakdown what the theoretical present day concept for each character is that Luz meets versus the backstory version: Eda: Irreverent criminal who is only out for herself and probably would just be committing larger scale crimes for funsies if not for the curse. Backstory: Lovable scamp with a heart of gold who only ever does jokes, nothing actually bad and look at this child she adopted and totally won't threaten with rent later on.

Amity: A driven, goal obsesses girl who will do anything to be the best. Even simply losing the title and not being made to look like a fool is enough to warrant someone needing to die and she bullies the weak for fun and superiority. Backstory: Felt bad for hurting her teammates for personal glory and victory (those same teammates she will tell to eat a dick in that same episode), only bullied Willow for her own sake, frankly would rather just be a little goofball than actually succeed at anything.

Lilith... Okay, frankly it's more that S2 Lilith makes absolutely no sense with S1 Lilith. If they hadn't entirely warped her character, her backstory is actually pitch perfect for her grown up self, even down to being a little silly and caring about her sister. A LITTLE silly mind you.

Golden Guard: Actually fits the backstory as the rage and confidence of youth mixed with too much power and indoctrination make for an incredibly dangerous, close to unhinged Kylo Ren clone who will go from joking to I WILL MURDER YOU! if you don't take him seriously or annoy him.

Hunter: I'm just a widdle silly guy who can't even gut check a girl and force her to give me my staff. I am all for wild magic because maybe it can save my uncle, despite my uncle's problems being caused by wild magic. I will literally never win a fight alone except against Kikimora, the closest to a true, reoccurring gag villain that the series has.

Now yes: A character can grow and change as they get older. It can be a fun joke to have a prim and proper character have been a nightmare as a toddler. But this isn't how TOH portrays these backstory moments commonly. Much of the time, the backstory is meant to effectively be in the place of real moments in a character arc.

Take Amity's moment with Willow. In a normal character arc, this is the chance for the character to prove that they have a good heart and are maybe not as mean as they seem. However, Amity already has done that at least once with confessing to not wanting to see Luz hurt in Adventure in the Elements, if her diary didn't already do this in combination with not holding onto her rage against Luz there in Lost in Language. So they HAVE to put it as a backstory moment or it wouldn't be notable. Except... It would have? Hell, they even try to frame it as a kindness to Willow at the beginning which is a good idea because Amity's first appearance was being cruel to Willow but now that she's changed some but hasn't interacted with Willow since episode 6, she needs to show some kindness to her. But it's ALL kindness because they've already fully transitioned into good girl Amity so rather than feeling like a growth moment, it's to justify what they're doing. To say "Of course her development isn't this rushed because it's not development! It's just the old Amity coming back out."

The moment with the Thorn Vault is similar. A character like Amity SHOULD have a moment where she decides success isn't everything and steps back so as to allow someone else to take the spotlight if it means doing less harm. It's a good idea for a moment in her arc. But again: Amity has already moved past that part of her arc. She hasn't been focused on success or being the best since her SECOND APPEARANCE. And this is her last one in S1 so it goes into the backstory to show that she does understand the consequences of her actions rather than having it be a part of her arc.

Frankly, this stuff is just a part of a different blog I need to make about how Amity episodes are strangely NOT about Amity. She actually doesn't factor into them much so her arc feels bad because even episodes like Lost in Language or Adventure in the Elements only have five minutes of Amity at most.

Meanwhile for someone like Eda or Hunter, it's retcons. Eda needs to be convincingly like Momma Eda so making her actually motherly with King when they first met is a good idea... But it contrasts all they did in S1. Hunter is meant to show the cruelty of Belos but they want him to already be the sad but mad boy by the halfway point of the season (which btw, halfway through S1, Amity was already borrowing an Azura book from Luz showing compromise, kindness and connection, much like Hunter connecting with Amity's fears, almost giving into her speech about kindness and adopting Flapjack. There's a reason I say the shortening did fuck all to these character arcs because they follow the same god damned patterns) so that stuff needs to be in the backstory, like his scout training.

And to me, that is the antithesis of a backstory. Unless the point is that they're different from who they used to be, which it's often not for TOH, it should reinforce what we know about them. How did they get to the point they're at. It's actually one of the only strengths narratively of Them's the Breaks because the final challenge by Terra is a good moment to make Eda start rethinking her long term goals and if she likes the coven system at all.

It would just work way better if her present day character was anti-coven because it pits people against each other and tears the Isles apart instead of just "It makes you way less cooler than me because I can do ALL styles of magic." As such... It's them acknowledging what a good motivation in the setting and plot would have been but recognizing it too late so they have to add it as a retcon.

And you can only get away with that trick so many times before it feels like your story is a house of cards trying to pretend it's made out of stone.

==========

I have a public Discord for any and all who want to join!

I also have an Amazon page for all of my original works in various forms of character focused romances from cute, teenage romance to erotica series of my past. I have an Ao3 for my fanfiction projects as well if that catches your fancy instead, If you want to hang out with me, I stream from time to time and love to chat with chat.

And finally a Twitter you can follow too!

[erstwhilesparrow]

sorry that was really confident of me, i should say i haven't finished lizzie's last life, and i have only seen cleo's last life session 4. there are my sources. now. let's make a list:

okay. i'm annoyed with myself for not taking more detailed notes at the time, but i am sort of gnawing at drywall that people (bigb, cleo) come to the fairy fort and notice lizzie's dogs and are like, "ah, your dogs will protect you from danger!" this is because later, lizzie is going to get one (1) Rendiggitydog. i am thinking about how ren does the math for lizzie on how many diamonds she'll need to get a full set of armour, and then later returns from an adventure with diamonds that he specifically gives to lizzie so she can get diamond boots. she has her loyal knight! she has her dogs. thinking about cleo standing over the burning fairy fort while lizzie and ren and bigb watch them. i know what i'm about to say is kind of Inventing A Dynamic and thus not quite what i promised but you could do something here about cleo+ren+lizzie and the notion of stop hiding behind your dogs and face me.

also shoutout to catrina belovedgamers for noting that at one point lizzie calls a meeting of the castle alliance and ren, who isn't sure whether he's part of this, waits just outside the front entrance for a bit, "like a good dog." :]

bigb and lizzie have a whole conversation about how bigb hasn't seen cleo in a bit that session, and they joke about how maybe she took off because she was the boogeyman, and bigb suggests maybe cleo was going to wait and plot before coming back to stab bigb in the back. the threeshadowing is wild. i realize this is not really about shadowrot but i went "!?!?!?" about it upon first hearing it and wanted to share.

cleo does nice things for lizzie? like yes their introduction is cleo pointing out that lizzie's Extremely Safe Circle Of Trees is very flammable (which i would call threeshadowing if not for the fact that we can't call every instance of people correctly noticing that flammable things are flammable in the life series threeshadowing; stuff getting burned is just kind of a rule of how the games work, like gravity) and doing some light threatening about how their castle's height relative to the fairy fort would make it quite easy to set the whole thing on fire, but then cleo is the one who puts fences in front of the main entrance to the fairy fort. they ask in chat "do you need help?" after lizzie dies to that zombie. they agree to make a secret tunnel connecting their bases and checks that lizzie is okay when she gets back from joel's attempted boogey kill. this is nice. this is charming.

and the OTHER thing that adds flavour to this is that lizzie is Very Obviously new to the death game! she smelts sand into glass panes for her house! (completely unrelated, did you know scott smajor also does this. in double life. and then realizes he doesn't have enough sand left for tnt. sorry, i like scott.) she turns her sugarcane into paper and then into nametags for her dogs. cleo has to remind her things can and do burn on this server. cleo's done this once already and can guess how it will go; lizzie doesn't know yet. some kind of old mirror. (and later, in secret life, cleo will have been in every game since the start, and lizzie was there for one, and then gone until now.)

hey scar keeps calling lizzie 'liz'. this isn't related to shadowrot , i just like thinking about people's names and what people call each other.

lizzie says she's going to entrust the enchanting table to cleo and cleo laughs and immediately says that's a bad idea. cleo's not going to pretend about it, but they are still. trusted. for someone who is constantly running around and talking like a terrified, paranoid chihuahua, lizzie's also pretty trusting, huh?

also. really charmed that lizzie comes back from her boogeyman kill and goes, "i feel much better, thank you," and cleo just laughs, even though lizzie fully and blatantly lied to them and bigb about not being boogey. later, lizzie is talking to someone (i've forgotten who) and you can hear cleo laughing quietly in the background. they think she's funny!! and she is!! to be fair!! but this is charming to me also.

speaking of the boogey kill. lizzie uses CLEO as a ~scapegoat to lure scott and pearl into following her to her trap. 'oh i'm worried they're going to kill me, they threatened me a few times', etc etc. and it works!! there might be Something here about lizzie... being happy to instrumentalize people? their reputations and skills and resources? there might be something here about Knowing scott and pearl and cleo's reputation and leveraging all three of those things at once. hey remember lizzie instantly correctly guessing that the person who told ren that impulse was the boogeyman was etho? i think she might actually be really good at this.

"i don't know what came over me, i'm so sorry" <- having this from lizzie (said to scott) before bigb's kill on cleo... does explain some things about the "you've never been boogey, you don't know what it feels like" defense.

[watches three episodes of lizzie last life] OH. OH OKAY. YEAH OKAY I UNDERSTAND SHADOWROT NOW.

[shadeswift99]

If you wanted to break someone, what would you do?

I would give him a family to fight for. I would give him a campfire and a host of companions to shout and sing with behind safe walls, brothers in arms, a banner to fly and a shield to hold high for his king as they march for the sunrise. I would give him a battle, a proving ground to spill his love as blood and sweat for the cause, for that family. I would give him a purpose. I would give him a destiny.

And then...I would take it away. A sword to cut the strings of his bond, his family flung to the far corners of a new, crueler world, leaving him alone again and stumbling without the expected solid ground of a shoulder to lean on. And I would watch him try to build it all up again. I'd watch him find first one, then two more, call them brothers over and over again until they half-heartedly say it back, push them together like opposite poles of a magnet as they repel and bounce back from each other and simply fail to understand. I'd watch as he figured out what they were missing, tried his hardest to become that king under whose banner he used to thrive to them.

I'd watch him fail. I'd watch him protest as they say they have no leadership, speaking as though he isn't even there, as though they were not leaning on the shields he made them with his own hands. I'd watch him finally fall silent as this flaming mess he tried to lump together and call a "family" threatens to kill each other. Tries to kill each other. Succeeds. I would place that man at the top of a hill, give him a little hope, give him the hint of a laugh of camaraderie and the chance that maybe this might work out after all...and then I would shatter him against the cliffside with the arrows of enemies in his back, anyone who could have stood behind him and shielded him from the blows long since run away for their own safety: each in seperate directions.

I would take it all away again, and it would hurt all the more with the final, long-fought acceptance that this time, it was never real to begin with.

And now, from who would the finishing blow come? When he had been cast out alone, the darkness almost a relief compared to the faces he tried to insist with closed eyes were those of the past and not the present, when his only comfort is blood and his only solace is throwing all caution to the wind and seeking glory one last time: glory at the door of a castle tower, glory at the end of a sword, glory at a second final death charge into the unknown...who would I send to be his final war horn? Who would do him the honour of a hero's fall?

There would be none.

No horn. No glory. No battle. He would be shot, once more in the back, while running away.

And there would be no king.

But there would be a single red scrap tied around a wrist and a faded scar running across a neck. He would be a ghost, all this man tried to be, all that he failed to be, all the comfort that he cried to and all the bravery and spirit he wished he had when his own haphazard militia denied him to his face and laughed at his pain. And the look in the eyes of the Red Once-King when he fires would be nothing but disappointment. And the man would not live long enough to turn and see it.

But he would see it when his eyes close. He would see it in the stars as his life drips into the grass, in the end even that too forsaking him. And when he next rose, ghostly and inconsequential, his spirit, the thing he tried so hard to inherit when his own had always burned so strong all by itself...will finally, finally be broken. He would stay in the forest, looking down at his body, lingering on. Waiting to move on until somebody happened by and laid the man he tried to be to rest.

No one would come.

No one ever did.

[mochiwrites]

I'm here and it's midnight and I am 👀👀👀

So dear readers this comment is definitely gonna contain spoilers (so read hello my old heart first <3) but I simply MUST scream <3

So first of all AAAAA MY HEART, Mumbo thinks he's only good for killing :( It comes so easy to him and just kjfgdkjg he's good at his job even if he doesn't like it and he KNOWS Scar and Grian would tell him he's wrong but he thinks it and that's enough to be absolutely heartbreaking </3

HJjkfgsdlk it takes Scar a month to send him back out, I wonder if it's because of the lack of targets or because he wanted to keep Mumbo close by......... my vote's on the latter lol- but Mumbo wanting to retain his financial independence even when he's basically living with Scar and Grian is just. I understand that feeling hjgfkjd-

SERVANT OF THE GRIM REAPER that is such a badass way to describe an assassin 👀👀 Also how dare that one line alone give me a whole new idea for an AU??? Mochi how could you do this to me- ANYWAY Mumbo being numbed to the pleas, just clean taking out his target and getting the info he needs. Such a badass I love him, he's scary <3 But 👀 That hesitation over the file labeled "Family"........ why do I get the feeling that is gonna come back and it's gonna hit him AND me way too fucking hard I am. Expecting death from that little drop, Mochi what are you planning-

LOOK I HAD NO IDEA WHAT TO EXPECT FROM THE CUPBOARD. I was like "👀👀 Is it? But no, it can't be... can it? Brown hair spilling out of a hood... could it.... is it? 👀👀👀" THANK THE GODS ABOVE AND BELOW THAT MUMBO DOESN'T SHOOT FIRST ASK NEVER hjgfdjkgf-!

I had completely forgot for a moment that Scar and Ren are (tentative) allies at this point and got a little worried when she said she worked for Ren hjfksjgfsjk SHE JUST IMMEDIATELY ASKS TO MEET SCAR when Mumbo reveals he works for him, and the fact that he gives in because she pleads with him because she's LOOKING for someone and is being VULNERABLE in that moment and it's just. Mumbo is gonna destroy me, isn't he? Mochi, you're going to kill me, I can feel it already and I am already crying. Mochi. pls-

THE PAPERWORK SCENE. Grian being a little shit. I love them. I love their joking and their flirting and Scar's dramatics and JELLIE <3 Jellie is the highlight of the chapter, the queen of the crew /j/j Awwwwwwwww they already miss Mumbo <3 And Grian is worrying about him I love them so much and I am going to say that half a million times btw just so you know, but they're so worried and want him to come home and and and- AND THERE HE ISSSSSS <3 the boy is home and the Grian is DELIGHTED I love-

"Hello love" look I am going to go feral I love when characters call their SO's "love" I am. It is. It is such a. A wonderful endearment I am hjfgsdjkfdsjk <3 Grian is so stubborn and it's fucking adorable, him just like "I did not miss you one bit" while clinging to him like a limpet kjgfdjkgfdjk I love them okay- "...mustache still fully intact" yes this is CLEARLY a VERY important thing, yes <3 Also the fact that Grian doesn't know about the thumb drive is. Hm 👀 I guess he doesn't NEED to know, so far as, ah, business is concerned, but. Hm. Still-

THERE SHE IS SHE'S HERE SHE'S ALIVE THE CONFIRMATION I AM 👀👀👀👀👀 WITH SO MUCH JOY OUR GIRL IS ALIVE WONDERFUL <3 This reunion is so. SO. The uncertainty that this is real, the confusion and the hopeful joy, the knowing she's real when they embrace, because it's warm and solid and familiar and just- them <3 And the fact that Mumbo and Scar realize that this is a moment they should probably let them have alone, let them have this reunion and this talk to themselves- it's like an extension of trust, realizing that this is. This is important and fragile and so so so meaningful, and knowing that she won't hurt Grian- and it is just. I am. I love. Am just SOBBING over this <3

He has fully embraced his new(ish) identity and honestly I love that so much for him <3

PEARL SURVIVED off of a game plan, sheer stubborness and a determination to see Grian again- I love her so much, she means everything to me. The hubris of the Watchers being their downfall, assuming she was dead without checking- I LOVE IT you know I love a good "be my own downfall" plot point. Wonderful. And the fact that she almost died and was saved by mere CHANCE. AND IMPULSE. FATHER FIGURE IMPULSE. 2/3 Soup Group Fam let's gooooo! But oh my god the fact that Pearl was THAT CLOSE this whole time......... MOCHI I AM BITING WHAT THE F- Laughing because there is nothing else you can do is one of the most painful things in the world <3 Laughing because you're crying and there is a cruel irony in the world and it's so funny :) Because they were so close this whole time and were hurting and missing each other and it's irony in one of the worst ways and just </3 They laugh. They laugh. (I'm sorry the laughter got to me bc I do not read it as genuine "wow this is so funny" laughter but as "wow that is so fucked up" laughter, laughing because the only other option is sobbing haha <3 I am fun at parties-)

GUILT. GUILT. GUILT. She didn't come back but he never expected her to because he thought she was dead so the fact she's here now is so much more than he ever expected and just kfdskjfd how can he be mad when this is LOADS better than anything he ever expected?? They're here now, together, and as a bonus they're not on opposite sides of a war hjgfrkj even if Grian's immediately reaction is "ew, Ren?" lMAO-

The fact Grian just assumes she means his relationship with Scar rather than how he came to work for Scar is just. Such sibling energy, it's beautiful haha <3

My god such a weight has been lifted from Grian's shoulders, his fear about his love killing people- now he knows it was all a lie and she's here and they're here and it wasn't his fault, that is just. I love this for him. I love it for them. I love them both <3

"... if he doesn't strangle her with a pillow first." Yep, yep. Siblings. Wonderful! I love it

MOCHI THIS CHAPTER WAS SO GOOD I AM ACTUALLY DYING OVER HERE this was everything, the Mumscarian, the Siblings, the Revelation, I am SO happy she turned out to be alive, I was so afraid this whole time and I am. I am SO. I love this AU <3

.... I love them :) <3 WONDERFUL JOB AS USUAL and I am so glad to see you so enthusiastic about writing it again <3

Welcome back, GoodCrimesWithMumscarian <3

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA HI ACI I'M FINALLY GETTING TO THIS FJGHFJGFH

OKAY SO. lots to unpack here huh :3

I know I don't talk about it much since grian is my main guy but god mumbo.... mumbo in this au is heartbreaking to me, and I sincerely hope to explore that further in the second half of the series. we've gotten just about all of scar's story, but grian and mumbo are left a little more... unclear. though if anything we know more about grian than we do mumbo.

and if all goes according to plan, that Will change. there's a lot to be explored with mumbo; his past, his mental state, etc etc. poor guy is traumatized as hell and I've only just started to scratch the surface of it all.

(scar definitely keeps mumbo close because he wants to protect him. I tried to state that in the fic without explicitly going "yeah mumbo's been doing nothing bc scar is worried about cub getting to him.")

I had a feeling as soon as I mentioned a woman with brown hair in a cabinet that people would think it was pearl GHFHGJFH hence why I didn't give anything away until she met with grian <33 but yeah, thank GOD mumbo asked first, shot later jhgfjf

and yes, mumbo WILL kill you :3 I've got Plans(tm)

CAN I JUST SAY THE PAPERWORK SCENE FELT SO CATHARTIC TO WRITE???? like finally!!!!! the boys can flirt and be gay on main!!!!! they can be in love and be happy about it!!!!!! also grian being worried about mumbo was one of my favorite parts <3

AND LOOK. LOOK. I CALL MY PARTNERS LOVE. ITS MY CRIME FIC AND I GET TO PROJECT /lh GHFHGFJG but GOD I'm so weak for "love" as a term of endearment, it makes me waIL

finally, at the bread and butter of this entire thing. PEARL <3333 god I had to revise that scene of her and grian a few times because I wanted it to be perfect. I had certain points laid out for myself that I knew I wanted to hit (grian's guilt, how pearl escaped, impulse mention) and it took a few tries to get that right.

it was planned basically from the beginning for impulse to be the one to find pearl and take her in <3

but yeah, hehe, pearl and grian were THAT close to one another the whole time. pearl doesn't necessarily work for ren, so there was never all that high of a chance of her running into grian while doing smth for ren. but they were def closer than they originally thought.

they laugh because if they don't, they'll look at each other and sob. you nailed the laughter bit, yeah.

I think the thing I love about grian and pearl is that a lot of their life was led by guilt. for pearl it was guilt that she left grian behind, even though she promised to come back for him. for her it was her living a normal life with impulse, going to school, experiencing the life of a teenager, while grian was still suffering. she definitely had moments of "is this okay? am I allowed this while he's suffering?" and grian's guilt came from believing he was the reason she was killed. for years he thought her blood was on his hands. and despite feeling guilty for a different reason, he still asked those same questions, "is this okay? should I be allowed this when her death was my fault?"

...I am slowly coming to realize that the power of guilt is basically like an integral theme to this au huh.

ANYWAYS!!!!

eeeee I'm glad you liked it !!!!! :D I'm so happy to finally be able to share that pearl is in fact Not Dead, and now there's more to the au that I can discuss!!!! <3

[votederpycausemufins]

College has stopped kicking my butt enough for me to post another chapter of the the Scattered au fic. this one is meant to be a parallel to last chapter, so you might want to reread that one.

scattered au is by @hermitcraftheadcanons and their community

reading tag list: still just @helleborusangel right now. Send an ask if you want to be added on.

Xisuma pulled himself out of the water, coughing a bit from what had gotten past his filter. He tried to look around only to squint at the light from the surface. He didn’t think he had swum that far up, but for all he knew, he was able to push himself that far to finally escape the warden. So when something suddenly attacked him and didn’t immediately kill him, Xisuma quickly fought back.

While initially swimming, he thought he had felt something though wasn’t sure, but this was much more clear. And slimelike, it seemed, since that’s what it felt like when he attacked it. But the following grunt of pain from the attacker sounded much more human like.

Xisuma did his best to focus on whatever was there, but he was seeing double. He looked back and forth, trying to tell if it was just from the intense lighting change or from there actually being two… things there. And it seemed it was the latter when the things looked at each other.

“Well, that’s probably not good.” The two things spoke in unison, which didn’t help the headache that Xisuma could feel coming on. Still, he was able to focus enough to get a good look at whatever was there and was a slime hybrid of sorts similar to Jevin, though instead of his very clearly blue slime, these two - one? They were more of a sea green. Plus from what Xisuma could guess, they were able to split like a regular slime, something Jevin couldn’t.

“Sorry.” Xisuma spoke up, it finally clicking in his mind that he had likely damaged them enough to make them split. “I didn’t mean to hurt you. I thought you were attacking- I mean, maybe you were, but this does seem to be where you’re staying, so I guess I invaded your home a bit.”

“I guess. So, are you from around here?” The slime pair asked, making Xisuma shake his head. “Huh, neither am I… are we… This is the first time I’ve split so-”

Xisuma tilted his head a little. “I guess it is pretty safe here. Have you had any deaths so far?”

“I thought that was going to be my first.”

“So that would explain the lack of death messages as opposed to Gemini or Pearlescent. Do you know either of them?”

“No, sorry, not really.” The slime people answered. “Well, uh, there’s just enough here if you need basic tools, but not much else. I’ve got a pickaxe- crafting table.”

Xisuma looked between the two. “I think both would be nice. I spawned underground and had trouble with getting anything at all.” And before he could say more, the slime people were handing him those two items and a few more.

“You’re on your own for food though. Berries aren’t the most filling, so I’ve been eating them all up. They taste nice though.” And to prove their point, each of the slime people went after a berry, though they went after the same one and ended up fighting over it.

Xisuma nodded and went up to one of the walls. This would be much easier than getting the warden to do all his mining, seeing as how he would now be in control. He started to staircase out of the cave, placing what few torches he had until he found more coal. Technically he didn’t need to, but then something could spawn and head down and attack the slime pair. And Xisuma didn’t want to never return and just leave them there alone forever. So when he finally did get up to the surface, Xisuma went straight back down. “Are you sure you want to- er, what are you doing?”

The slime people looked back over to Xisuma and shrugged. “Trying to fuse back together or something. Why did you come back?”

Xisuma wasn’t sure exactly what happened, but the next thing he really knew, he was going back up towards the surface, his arms full from holding the slime pair, one cradled in each arm. Sure, they said they would be safe alone in the cave, but X couldn’t help the feeling that they wouldn’t be safe so far away. He was pretty sure it was just from his worry about everyone else, and this was just one person he could protect, but Xisuma couldn’t help but wonder if there was something else going on.

.

.

.

Hypno leaned against Etho, who was doing surprisingly well considering their current situation. Both of them were low on hunger, only managing to stay alive from what little they could get from the flowers and grass they picked and ate. Etho somehow managed to find a pig wandering around and killed it for some raw pork, handing it to Hypno to eat. They couldn’t cook it, but Etho was less worried about the hunger the meat would satiate and more about the fact that Hypno wasn’t fully himself.

After the initial shock of finding horns on Hypno’s head, the pair looked him over. Hypno made mention of an ache at the base of his spine, and Etho found a few concerning bumps on Hypno’s upper back. Until they actively looked into it, Hypno hadn’t noticed anything wrong, which led to them checking Etho, and also giving the ninja something to plan for on his next respawns.

Etho was glad they didn’t notice much with him, but with little to do, he explained to Hypno his encounters with Ren, Impulse and Grian. Out of the three, Impulse had seemed the most normal, only having red eyes instead of the golden brown he usually sported. Ren had seemed fine at first, but then in the attack from the creeper, the shifter had killed Etho, acting like an attacked wolf. And then Grian for the most part had been acting like a bird, though near the end…

A moobloom trotted over, pulling Etho out of his thoughts. It nuzzled against Hypno, who happily reciprocated. Still worried about the other hermit and the effects the environment was having on him, Etho forcefully separated the two, needing to attack the animal to make it flee.

“What was that for Etho? It was just being friendly.”

“Right now, we need to be cautious of everything. Especially those cows and all the flowers around here. Because in case you forgot, growing horns like that is not normal. Plus, we could use the food right now.”

Hypno huffed. “We’ll use up more energy trying to kill it than we would get from anything it drops. It’s better to let us willingly help us than-”

Etho suddenly held up a finger to shush Hypno, letting them listen to the breeze. “Do you hear that?”

Hypno listened, only hearing a few moos from the nearby moobloom. “The cows?”

“Well, okay yeah. But it’s more what I’m not hearing.” And then Etho pulled out his communicator. Hypno watched as Etho stared at the screen, mask moving ever so slightly as he mouthed counting up. But nothing was happening. At first, Hypno didn’t get what was so important until he pulled out his own communicator. No death messages were coming in. Specifically none from Impulse.

“Impulse got out.” Hypno said, whispering in disbelief. “Someone must have found him.”

Etho nodded. “Yeah, but the question is who.” And then almost immediately, it was answered.

Zedaph was slain by impulseSV

.

.

.

If there was one thing that was a benefit to respawning in the same place every time, it was the fact that no matter how many times Impulse died, the guardians wouldn’t disappear. Meaning that after a few attempts, he finally killed one of the monsters giving him grief. Just being able to slay one of them felt freeing with all the torment he was currently being put through, but that wasn’t the only benefit.

When the guardian died, it dropped two things, a prismarine shard and some cod. Impulse greedily grabbed at the items, stuffing the shard in his inventory and then stuffing the fish in his mouth. After not eating in so long, the fish seemed like the most heavenly food in the world, though Impulse had other ideas on why that was the case.

Here and there, guardians had completely ignored him. Sometimes he felt like he was getting a full breath of air even though he was still stuck in the water. He hadn’t missed the webbing between his fingers and toes growing each respawn nor the scales that appeared and itched like crazy. Half of Impulse would have preferred drowning forever instead of whatever this was, but his other half realized that it was likely his only way out.

Another respawn left him fumbling for his prismarine shard, using it to dig into the nearby blocks. Along with the claw-like nails he had gained, Impulse was able to break another block, making him smile at first, but then his expression dropped. With the way the temples were constructed, the walls weren’t that thick. Instead of gaining an air pocket, he had just broken into another chamber.

“Impulse.”

In anger, Impulse took the prismarine shard and used it against the next guardian he saw.

“Impulse.”

He started by using it like a knife and jamming it into the eye of the beast, making it flail and spread its spikes.

“Impulse.”

As the world around him seemed to fade into blues and golds, Impulse kept attacking, needing to get his anger out somehow.

“Impulse. Impulse. Impulse.” And then Impulse felt like he was falling, but he still thrashed around, trying to stop whatever it was. Then the next thing he knew, it was like gravity had increased drastically, leaving him pressed against the floor. Something moved and he attacked it, surprised to find it feeling much fluffier than the guardians had been. There was a sound, like someone talking, but why would anyone be talking with him stuck all alone. Etho maybe? Was he back?

As the creature died in his hands, Impulse looked towards the sound. The first thing he noticed was that Etho’s eyes were now both red. Even the sclera were red. He had also dyed his hair blond, and gotten rid of his mask, and well that wasn’t Etho at all. Impulse kicked his legs to try and swim closer, only to finally realize he wasn’t underwater anymore.

The moment Impulse realized he was out of the sea temple, he started taking gulps of air. His lungs had already started breathing it all, but now he was trying to get as much oxygen as he could before he drowned again. A part in the back of his mind told him he couldn’t drown right now, but his mental state wasn’t the best right now.

“Hey Impulse. Calming down now?” Tango was asking, and Impulse looked over, glad to see his friend. He nodded, which got Tango to smile before looking off towards the horizon. Impulse briefly followed Tango’s eyes before his hand moved and he felt the soft wool of the carpets beneath him. It almost felt overwhelming how different it was compared to the past week plus that he had been stuck in the temple. But it was also good, so he wrapped himself up before following Tango’s eyes once more.

“What’s that way?” Impulse spoke, voice feeling unfamiliar from disuse and possibly alterations that matched everything else going on with him.

“Zed. I’m hoping he’ll be able to find us again since I have made a bit of a path.”

Impulse tilted his head before noticing his inventory had many more items. “Did he get killed or something?”

“Yeah, you sort of killed him when we first summoned you in.” Tango explained, and Impulse felt horrified. Him? Kill Zedaph? For a prank or something, sure, that was believable, But this had been from pure bloodlust at the time.

“I killed him? Oh no! I didn’t know! It had been a guardian at first, and then I was falling, and then I was-”

“Hey, calm down.” Tango replied. He took a step toward Impulse, obviously to comfort him, but then Impulse was surprised to see his friend change their mind and step back again. “Zed and I figured something like this might happen. We would have made beds to set our spawn, but we haven’t been collecting wool that much, so at most we would have had just one piece.”

Impulse chucked a little after realizing there were no sheep around. “What? Did Zedaph finally grow his hair out enough?” And he expected Tango to laugh in return, but the frown that appeared didn’t bode well.

“Impulse, do you… realize what you look like?” Tango asked, and then Impulse looked down at his hand and flexed it.

“What’s happened with Zedaph?”

Tango took a few steps to the side and a moment later the nearby leaves of a tree caught fire. “Zed and I have had both of our more animal-esque traits acting up. I’m burning just about any flammable thing that gets close to me and his wool is growing out of control. There’s other stuff too but…”

“But even if you’re not ending up like me, you’re still dealing with your own things.”

“Hey! I’m back! And it looks like Impulse has not killed you!”

.

.

.

Hels cut down a hoglin that was in the way of he and Wels as they travelled the nether. Wels was reluctantly following, his copy being the only reason he was doing so well right now. Well that, and the fact that he was promising some sort of shelter. They went a bit further, and then Wels spotted something that was clearly man made, making him try to run forward for shelter before he was grabbed by Hels. “Don’t run ahead idiot. I just know that you’ll manage to die if you try that and we’ll have to start all over.”

“Well I’m sure I could find a way to survive fine on my own.”

“Sure you could.” Hels said, obviously sarcastic. “And your death messages make that so very believable. Tell me, have you noticed anything odd about your situation, other than being stuck in the nether.”

“Well, chat hasn’t been working right and I can’t regenerate my health.”

“Right… Well, what have you been eating?” Hels asked as they finally reached the door to the helsmit’s base, opening it to let Wels inside.

“Mainly crimson fungi or the rare pork if I can chip enough health away from a hoglin.” Wels answered, linking himself to the respawn anchor sitting inside.

“That fungi is only edible to hoglins you know.” Hels said, closing the door and then crossing his arms.

“Well obviously that’s not the case here.” And then Wels made his point by munching down on a mushroom he still had in his inventory.

Hels pursed his lips before yanking the fungi out of Wels’ hand and then smashing the knight’s head against a nearby wall. “Spit that out right now or I’ll go again until I break your tusks.”

“My what?” Wels asked, reluctantly spitting out the half chewed fungus.

“You’re an idiot. How did you not notice you were growing tusks?”

And Wels didn’t have an answer, just letting his hand go to his mouth and feel what were definitely tusks. “When did-”

“Who knows. My guess is it's something with this world. It’s not like any of us want to be here.”

Wels looked back over to Hels at that comment, a questioning look on his face. “Evil Xisuma approached me a few weeks ago. He was planning to get into the new season before the rest of you so he could keep from getting banned and put some action into play with his brother and a number of the other hermits. I wasn’t as interested in his plan, but having fun on the server on my own seemed like a good idea to me. A few others were planning to join us, but I’m sure they haven’t followed along. So as far as I’m aware, it is only Evil Xisuma and I trapped here with all of you.”

“Well, at the very least neither of us are stuck here alone.” Wels spoke, trying to give a positive spin on things.

“I would have preferred to be alone.” Hels replied. “You’ll use up more of my resources. That being said, my guess is you’re necessary for whatever is going on around here to stop. So until that’s fixed or I learn otherwise, I am reluctantly helping you.”

“Alright, that sounds fine for now. And you said Evil Xisuma is here too, correct? Any clue where he could be?”

.

.

.

Bdubs stared down at the void below his feet, glad to have stopped moving, though his gut was still getting used to that change. The guy in pink armor next to him was reluctantly patting his back as another wave of nausea hit and he started to dry heave. “Th-Thanks.”

“Whatever. I just know what being stuck in the void is like so I have a little sympathy.”

“Well glad to know I’m not the only one stuck in this situation. Not that that’s a good thing.”

“Right.” The armored person deadpanned, looking down at the void as well.

Bdubs was quiet for a little before looking over to his savior. “So then, I don’t really think I caught your name in all our yelling to heave both of us up here.”

The other person raised an eyebrow at Bdubs, as if to ask if he was serious, then being a little surprised when he was. The person hesitated, looking down, not to the void but more at their lap, then a hand fiddled with their hair before they finally looked back at Bdubs. “Name’s Xannes.”

“Nice to meet you. I’m Bdubs!” And he held out a hand, pausing as he noticed the state it was in.

Xannes took the hand carefully and shook it, before helping it back to Bdubs’ side. “Side effect of the void. I’m more protected because of my armor, but you don’t have that.”

“Well now I’m actually upset about not having armor, even if it were pink.”

Xannes looked incredulous at that before putting his hands on his hips. “Hey, this is simply a… lightish red.”

“You mean pink.”

“Lightish. Red.”

“Lightish red is red mixed with white. And what does that give you? Pink. You’ve got pink armor.”

“Alright, so maybe it’s supposed to be pink.” Xannes conceded. “But my color is red, and this isn’t my armor, I’m simply borrowing it. So for anyone else, it would be pink, but as long as I wear it, it’s a lightish red.”

“Whatever you say.”

Xannes sighed and then carefully took Bdubs’ hand again. “Alright, so looking again, this doesn’t quite look as natural as being stuck in the voice can make it. Obviously that’s because none of this is natural. Even though it wouldn’t help me in the long run if it were working, I have tested plenty with my communicator and learned a number of things. First, we are not the only ones in a situation like this.”

“Yeah.” Bdubs agreed. “I already met Scar stuck on one of the islands below.”

“Noted.” Xannes nodded. “Well, others have similar odd spawns. I- Someone named Impulse had been stuck in a guardian temple, a Docm77 has been sent to his death by goats. X-Xisuma has been dealing with a warden.” Xannes started to explain, voice getting quieter at the last example, though Bdubs didn’t notice.

“And the void stuff?”

“If I knew more about what was going on, I could tell you. But as it stands, I can just tell your limbs seem to have a form of void-bite and your eyes are as dark as the void itself.”

Bdubs leaned back a little in shock at the comment. “Wait, really?” And then he was fishing into his shirt before pulling out a knife, Xannes’ eyes widening at the weapon. Bdubs held the blade up, briefly putting it back down to shine it against his shirt before using it as a mirror and then staring into it. Sure enough, his eyes seemed to go on forever into their sockets, pure darkness filling them.

“How many knives do you have?” Xannes asked, tearing Bdubs’ gaze from the weapon.

“Huh? Oh, I’ve got plenty. Want one?” And he pulled out another, only the tiniest bit worried about being stabbed by the unfamiliar person. But instead of stabbing him, Xannes simply threw the knife off the edge, watching it fall down. “What was that for?”

Xannes didn’t really reply, just holding a finger up for Bdubs to wait. Reluctantly, he did, but then got restless as time seemed to drag on. Any time he attempted to talk, he would just get shushed, making it feel even worse. Finally, out of nowhere, the knife suddenly fell past them, making Bdubs jump back enough that he nearly fell off their gateway and into the void, but Xannes grabbed him before that could happen and pulled him back in.

“Well then, it seems like a loop around the void lasts around two and a half minutes.” Xannes stated, shifting to turn his body and move to a different part of the gateway. “I guess it would be less on a second loop after already reaching terminal velocity, but it's good to know. I know something has been flying past here ever so often but I was still sort of stuck on the side of this thing for most of it, then I was dealing with you, so… you get the idea.”

“You telling me everything’s looping up and down like us?” Bdubs asked, looking around the sky, or what passed for it in the end.

“Us and anything non-living. I’ve already seen that there have been three void related deaths by Scar, Etho and TinFoilChef.”

“Well so far I’ve only seen Scar and you.” Bdubs replied. “I guess those other two are stuck around here too.”

“The chef, yes, but I’m not so sure about the other.” And Xannes handed his comm to Bdubs, showing a list of death messages, all belonging to Etho. “I have a function that lets me sort these messages. It’s very handy.” And then he reached off to the side, catching a comm as it fell from the air. “And this would be yours. I’ve seen it here and there… To be honest, it seems like it takes more than two or so minutes. We might need to test more.”

Bdubs swapped their communicators before looking down at the abyss below. “Well, Scar’s somewhere down there, I already found him once. I’m gonna see if I can get to him again and you can do whatever while I’m falling.”

Xannes rubbed his chin and then nodded. “Alright, go ahead. I’ll look out for you. If you respawn, wait a loop for me to catch you because I don’t have omniscient reaction time.”

“Sounds good to me.” Bdubs replied with a smile, then jumped into the void once more, ignoring the fear that came with it.

.

.

.

Scar rolled around on the end stone, trying to get to sleep. Sure, beds didn’t work in the end, but that didn’t mean you couldn’t sleep. It just wasn’t restful enough to keep phantoms away or set a spawn. Not like he needed to set a spawn three blocks away from his current one.

But right now, there was too much noise. The endermen were slowly losing their cool with Scar and he was also hearing the whispering of the vex. To be honest, that was probably why huge endermen were acting as they were. Void magic didn’t like to work with other magic.

But even with all of that, Scar really wanted to sleep for another reason. The whispers of the vex weren’t the only new thing with him. He had polished the pillar near him as just something to do other than wait around. The end rod in particular he shined until it was just mirror-like enough that he saw his green eyes were now vex blue. From that, he checked himself over a bit more and found that his eyes weren’t the only change. He seemed to be an inch or three shorter and his skin was definitely paler than before. He didn’t have wings again, but he knew it would only be a matter of time.

Scar really didn’t want to use any more help from the vex yet, knowing it would speed things up. He wanted to keep hope out for seeing Bdubs again before doing anything since it could be his last chance before a deal was needed once more. If he could just-

“Convex.” A much clearer whisper spoke, making Scar jump a little. “Are you sure a deal is such a bad thing at this stage in time?”

“Oh no no no no no.” Scar insisted, standing up and waving his hands in refusal. “I’m sure I’ll be better use to my friends if I’m not mostly stuck working with you guys.”

“What if you were not working for us?” The whisper asked, making Scar pause.

“Wait? I’m Convex because I can’t become true vex because of Xisuma and him tainting me and Cub with the void or something. I would think now being stuck in the end would make it worse, not better!”

“You still cannot, that is true. But a new evoker is being trained, one also tainted by the void. And I believe you would want to work with them.”

Scar inhaled sharply at the implication, knowing that it must be a hermit they were referring to. He fumbled in pulling his communicator out and then scrolled through all the death messages before finally seeing what he wanted. Death messages to vindicators and evokers, both about Mumbo. “So clarification on this deal?”

“You will still be considered Convex, but on a higher level than before. Not quite at the level of standard vex however. But during this, you will be linked to the new evoker, and cannot be released unless they themselves will it. And you should not will your release either.”

“Yeah, yeah, if that’s all, sure!” Scar agreed quickly, so excited he didn’t really take the time to think it over. Then suddenly he could feel more magic flowing into him. So much it felt like a red hot iron pressed all over his body, especially at his scars. And then it was gone, and he was left panting on the ground.

He didn’t know how long he had been there, but suddenly his name was shouted and Scar managed to lift his head up. He saw Bdubs rocking down towards him again and suddenly felt stronger again, getting a burst of energy and moving towards the builder. New wings spread from his back and let him fly, keeping him above the void as he grabbed his friend and then slowed them before reaching the abyss below, then slowly dragging them back up.

“Bdubs! Are you okay?!” Scar asked the moment they were both on the endstone, only staying on his feet for a second before his knees buckled beneath him.

“Am I okay? Am I okay?! I’m on the sweet sweet ground again!” And then he kissed the stone beneath him. “What about you? You look… not Scar but sound normal.”

“I can explain more in a bit. There’s an end city just over that way and I want to get something so we can start towards the main island. I’ll see if there’s elytra for you.”

“Oh no. I don’t think I ever want to fly again. If anyone, give it to Xannes.”

“Who?”

“Okay, guess my story first.”

.

.

.

On the main island, TFC dodged another attack from the dragon. She had been attacking less frequently, which was good and bad in his eyes. No attacking meant less dying, but TFC needed her attacks to even attempt destroying all the crystals. Because there was no way she was dying to fists alone with them still around.

That all being said, TFC had a sneaking suspicion on why exactly that was happening. His prosthetics were built to match his remaining limbs in function, but gradually over the past few respawns, they were becoming off balance. In trying to fix them, TFC realized he was less human than before, claws on his hands and feet, and tenderness at his tailbone and shoulder blades.

TFC was old, that much was true. And because of that, he had seen all sorts of situations. While for the most part the problems of this world were new to TFC, adaptations were not. A number of present day hybrids were a result of that. Heck, mob variants were also sourced from suce and occurrence. So yeah, TFC was not too surprised about seemingly becoming a dragon hybrid.

Thinking it over, in the long run it would likely give him just enough of an upper hand to defeat the dragon, but there was also the concern of how long it would take to get to that point and how far these alterations would go. If this went too far, the world itself could mistake him for a new ender dragon, and even after killing the real one, no portal would form due to his existence.

Well, if that was the case, he would need to figure out what it was that made the existence of the dragon close the portal and see if he could reverse it. Especially since he recalled at least one or two hermits were supposed to be stuck in the end with him. Though that did give him another idea. Maybe he didn’t have to keep fighting if the dragon opened the portal herself.

The next time TFC respawned, he waited, giving her time to rest. When he was sure the dragon was fully healed again, the miner made his way to the podium and waited. The dragon swooped a few times, giving some warning shots, but she didn’t attack TFC directly, and he made no move to attack the crystals. She didn’t look happy, but TFC had plenty of time to wait.

.

.

.

In a bout of frustration, ink was spilled over the floor, making Mumbo even more frustrated than before. He didn’t understand the need for learning another language just for spells. He was sure that knowing the characters that appeared with enchanting would be enough, but apparently the illagers had their own writing system. At the very least, Mumbo recognized a character or two that Scar or Cub must have had written down, but it still felt like he was learning a new language from scratch.

With ink all over the place, Mumbo paused to work on cleaning everything up. He had ruined nearly all his materials, so now he would have to attempt to get more or find an illager who would assist him in such a task. Paper was easy enough to get, a farm already set up in the mansion, but Mumbo hadn’t automated it yet, so there wasn’t going to be much to reap. And squid ink wasn’t something they just had on hand.

Mumbo reached the farming room and grabbed what sugarcane had grown, taking the reeds over to a crafting table then cutting and pressing them into paper. He only managed to make six pages from all of that and didn’t have the material to bind them into a book.Instead of leaving the room, Mumbo put the paper into a nearby chest and then pulled out his redstone materials.

As Mumbo built, he decided to multitask by using redstone dust to practice some of the characters he needed to learn. He couldn’t remember the normal order of the characters, so he just wrote them at random. He never really focused on the characters, so he didn’t notice when a few in a line started to glow a bit. In fact, he was just pausing his writing to work on fixing a bit of redstone, his head stuck in the contraption.

His hand blindly reached for some string to add as a tripwire, but he was about half a foot to the wrong side of his pile of materials. When Mumbo’s hand started to go further, it was stopped by some thread being placed in his hand. The redstoner said his thanks and then strung it up before pausing and pulling his head out.

Standing nearby was someone Mumbo immediately recognized, not knowing anyone else with a bright red sweater like that. Not caring that he was currently covered in redstone dust, Mumbo jumped at the newcomer and hugged them tightly, so glad to see a familiar face. “Grian! You’re okay! How did you get here? Where are the bots? Are you alright?”

But pulling away again, Mumbo watched as Grian just blinked at him, seeming a little confused. “I think you may be mistaken and confused, my mustachioed friend. I mean, I am okay and I got here because of you, but I’m not sure what you mean by bots and well, you were trying to take to someone named Grian.”

Mumbo furrowed his brows. Looking them over again, he could tell this had to be Grian. His clothes and hair and everything were the same. He couldn’t quite tell about their eyes because they were wearing a mask, but it matched the one he had seen Grian with in the past, a black mark on its face instead of the purple Eflyn expected. The only thing unfamiliar were the wings. Shape and pattern wise, they matched the wings Grian had, but the colors of the feathers were no longer red yellow and blue, but purple grey and black.

“Well then. If you’re not Grian, then who are you?” Mumbo asked, and the person giggled slightly.

“I could have swore you already knew, but I guess not. The name is Xelqua, but don’t go throwing it around to just anyone.” And just hearing it reminded Mumbo. It had been a name Grian had told him before.

“Well, if you don’t want me throwing it around, I’m going to have to call you something.” Mumbo spoke up, Xelqua seeming to agree. “Since I already mistook you for him and he’s not around, how about I call you Grian.”

“Hmm.” Grian thought about it before shaking his head. “Just you and me, you can call me Xelqua. Otherwise just Watcher is fine, okay?”

“But I-” Mumbo started to say, and then there was a clatter, making Mumbo and Grian look over at the door where Eflyn was standing.

“Well. It seems we have another guest then…”

.

.

.

Joe had paused in his material gathering. It was just going to be for a little bit, but he needed to clear his head. And the best idea he had for that was climbing the tower at spawn the correct way. Sure, he could try climbing from the outside or something, finding a window, but at this point these were definitely Watchers, and Joe was very much aware that they were not to be messed with.

Joe needed to pause on a platform to hold his head, a headache forming. It had been coming and going for a while, but it didn’t feel so bad now, the tower already lit up pretty well. As he waited, his other hand clutched at the wall as best it could, just feeling the texture of the wall, as if to check that it was real. “Guess you really couldn’t have been swayed, now could you?” Joe asked, speaking into the empty air around him. “Well maybe after this mess we can try it again.”

Joe climbed a few more parts of the parkour that acted as steps before nearly falling to a sudden splitting headache. He half considered letting go and trying again, there being enough hay lining the floor below to break his fall, but he had already gotten so far. And maybe if he could get to the top of the tower…

It had been ages ago when Joe had first met a Watcher. From what he could tell, it was even the first Watcher to exist. One that eventually disappeared to time that not even the other Watchers knew what happened. He wasn’t an expert of whatever the Watchers exactly were, but it had been enough that he recognized Grian as one pretty quickly when they first met in season six. Though that was partially from that not being their first meeting.

Yes, Joe had been along for a very long time. Which is why he was not happy with everything going on. But he had a bargaining chip in the form of knowledge, so getting to the top might be the one place to try and use it.

His headache passed and the glow from his eyes faded. Joe pulled himself back onto the platform and then adjusted his glasses. Just a bit more to go until he was at the top.

.

.

.

Doc woke up in a wood hut, lying in a bed. His back and head hurt, getting worse when he attempted to move to get up. He tried to remember what happened last, but suddenly being knocked unconscious wasn’t the best thing to try and remember. Looking around in a way that didn’t hurt as much, he was able to see a chest as well as something lying on the ground to his right.

Some crackling implied there was also a furnace running nearby. Mixed with that was some slight banging of metal from crafting and the hum of a tune that was familiar to Doc, but he couldn’t quite place it.

Another attempt to sit up left Doc yelp slightly in pain, stopping the humming and crafting sounds, getting replaced with footsteps that came towards him. “Are you awake this time?”

“Grumbot?” Doc asked, vaguely recognizing the robot that appeared in front of him. He only really distinctly knew his larger form, only seeing him and his brother at this size when they were just about to leave their previous world.

“Yeah. looks like you are. We have some bread if you’re hungry.” Grum spoke in a quiet voice that felt so odd compared to how energetic the hermits usually were. That being said, it had been a while since he had seen anyone else, so it might have just been from what others were dealing with. “I also left some of the wheat as wheat if you prefer that.”

“What? Why would I want that? Bread sounds fine.”

“Okay, I wasn’t sure if you were like dad or not.” Grum said before he went over to the chest, giving Doc a moment to think things over.

“Dad as in Grian or Mumbo?”

“Grian.” Grum answered, pulling out some food. “He was with us on the mountain. Everything was getting to him, so he started eating seeds instead of other stuff.”

“Okay. Is he out getting supplies or something?” Doc asked and then Grum’s face shifted to something sadder. “What happened to Grian?”

“I don’t know.” Grum spoke, managing to be quieter than before. “He just disappeared and Jrum and I were stuck alone on the mountain. And then I messed up.” And it took all of Doc’s willpower to not sit up and possibly hurt himself in the process with how sad Grum sounded in that moment.

“Why? What happened?”

“Someone figured out how to send messages in chat by accident. Jrum and I noticed, and we were going to try it out for ourselves, but it didn’t go right. And now Jrum… Jrum didn’t respawn right.”

And with that comment, Doc realized what was on the ground nearby. Jrum’s body was laid out, screen dark and body unmoving. “How long has he been like that?”

“A few days I think. It got really snowy so I couldn’t quite tell. Then I got busy digging through the snow until I found some ice to break.”

“And that must have been the waterfall I took down off the mountain.” Doc said, making Grum look a little sheepish.

“Sorry about hitting you when I fell. I freaked out a bit and then you were there and I couldn’t react in time. I’m sure if it was anyone else, they would have been in worse shape.”

“Why’s that?” Doc asked, though he had an idea based on which side of him ached more.

“Well, your metal parts helped protect you plus I think your thicker skull helped from a concussion.”

“My what?”

“Oh, I thought you…” Grum said, trailing off. “Um, so I think more weird stuff is happening than just being stuck wherever.”

“Yeah, I knew that.” Doc said. “Creeper instincts have been kicking in like crazy.”

“Well, your death messages mentioned goats a lot. It looks like because of that, you’ve started turning into a goat hybrid as well.”

“I’ve what?” Doc asked, incredulously. He ignored the pain from moving when he started feeling himself over, finally finding horns coming from his head. “Oh… huh…”

Grum forced Doc back down to a resting position before feeding him some bread. Here, how about I tell you what I know about, then you can tell me what you know.

“Sounds good to me.”

[itsclydebitches]

I am sincerely so confused as to why the Gods are not portrayed as the absolute hypocritical monsters they are? Light God punishes Salem for wanting Ozma back, yet bring him back anyway to unite humanity - which is exactly what Salem did, she just united humanity against them. And what's worse is that we know the Light God is coded as good because his power is the same as our main protagonist.

While I absolutely agree that the Gods'... well, everything should be acknowledged by the show, I think the current problem is that they're not portrayed as anything at all post-"The Lost Fable." It's not really a case of the show providing a depiction of the Gods I'm not inclined to agree with given what we saw in the flashback, there is no depiction, period. They don't exist as something that's driving the story right now which, at this point, amounts to near three whole volumes of lost content. The only time I can recall them coming up is during Maria's talk with Ruby, which is really just re-stating facts to lead Ruby to her epiphany: one Brother created the grimm, the other Brother destroyed the grimm, he did so with a magical light... and then Ruby has her aha! moment — "The God of Light... His eyes! Okay, where do we start?" Has the group mentioned them at all outside of this? Have they mentioned the vision? Nora brings up the possibility that someone other than Ozpin could defeat Salem, but that's it (and that was less a discussion and more a theory spoken half to herself that an angry Ren ignored). The characters, along with the audience, were given 20 minutes of non-stop backstory and none of it has had a single bit of impact on the group, outside of breaking their relationship with Ozpin, that is. It has provided no new insight into how to fight this war. No reflection on their lives or deaths. Not even a change in regards to whether they'll fight at all because despite the dejected atmosphere post-vision, no one actually grappled with walking away. The closest they got was at the farm and that negativity was, canonically, due to the Apathy, not any knowledge outside of the Salem immortality secret. That vision was treated like filler, despite nothing in those 20 minutes being insignificant. Where's Weiss' sympathy for Ozpin as a family abuse survivor? Where's Blake's horror at the Gods' oppression and genocide? Where's Jaune's hope at seeing Pyrrha again in some afterlife? Where's Ren's fear that they're fighting a hopeless battle? Even when he does express some of those views in Volume 8, none of it is explicitly connected to the supernatural movie they watched. He's concerned with Jaune's transcript from Volume 1, not the revelation that bringing these Relics together will summon beings who wiped out the first version of humanity. There's not even an acknowledgement that the Gods' choices are what led to Salem's creation, the current antagonist they're concerned with. (When they're not, of course, concerned with Ironwood instead — which just highlights the issue here.) It's not that RWBY is taking clearly horrible entities and trying to pass them off as good guys... it's that RWBY isn't engaging with those entities at all. The Gods showed up for one episode, Maria referenced them for a pep talk, and they've had no impact on the story since.

As for the God of Light yeah, that coding is there, but in another series I would expect that to be the point. Meaning, you set up this binary view of the world for your protagonists — there are Good Guys, there are Bad Guys, and we know who is who because one is all scary black and summons grimm whereas the other is pretty white and bestows gifts! — only to slowly, over the course of the series, have them realize that real life doesn't work that way. That this binary doesn't exist. That Ruby's eyes are important because of how she chooses to use them, not because a being of seeming benevolence gave them to her. Problem is, that revelation should have started in Volume 6, with the characters realizing that Ozpin really is cursed and the nice looking God isn't actually any better than his brother. Now what do they do? Is Ruby comfortable using that power? Are they out to try and lift Ozpin's curse the way Light intended? Are the Gods their new enemies? A tool they'll use to stop Salem? Someone they're willing to forgive? There's the foundation here for a story about heroes not just getting the shock that Gods created them and their enemy, but that they're not necessarily a good thing to embrace either. They thought they were fighting a war where a Purely Evil Creature was attacking humanity. Now they realize it's a war where Salem was, in part, driven to this by creators who abandoned them and might, if the fancy strikes them, enslave or eradicate humanity 2.0 if they ever return. Well shit. How do we tackle that war? But, of course, that kind of story would require them thinking about, discussing, and planning around the Gods. Not ignoring their existence for three seasons.

Given RWBY's anime inspirations and the common theme of, "This being appears benevolent and I fight on their behalf but whoops they're actually awful haha now what?" in other stories, I don't think aligning Ruby's power with the God of Light is intrinsically a bad thing. It is, in fact, good setup for a later conflict. Problem is, absolutely nothing came of that revelation and now it's far too late. After focusing on Ozpin's secret instead, spending an undetermined amount of time doing basic Huntsmen stuff in Atlas, and now being fully immersed in a battle with Salem, having them suddenly go, "Oh yeah. There are Gods. What do we think about that?" is going to be... well, not great. Even if this island is precisely the God world that most fans expect, the group will only be tackling their existence because the plot is forcing them to, literally by "killing" them and trapping them so there's nothing else for them to focus on. The fandom has discussed at length the problem with making the cast almost purely reactive and this is just one more example. We established across Volumes 6-8 that they didn't actively care about the Gods. At all. Not what happened in the past, not what they might do in the future, not how they might impact this war. They were dismissed along with the rest of the vision, taking with it any opportunity to explore that revelation, or try to (mistakenly imo) paint the Gods as better than they were. It's just a non-starter atm. Trying to tackle that story now might still lead to some interesting ideas, but it can't patch the three Volume hole where that story should have started.

[soulguardianazeralith]

Guess who found @hermitcraftheadcanons ‘s Scattered Au? This bish. Admittedly, it’s a lot to catch up on but so far I’ve kiiiinda got a good idea of it?

Aaaanyways, I saw somefin that caught my eye and it was Grian’s situation. Stuck in the cold, dying to the cold over and over. Getting saved by Doc. It seemed sad but interesting!

But, at least to me, I feel like it needed a small bit of tension. So here I am! Gonna give out a dumb idea I had! I will note, this Grian isn’t a fox mix or has feathery wings. I kiiinda threw in my own version into the mix- you know what, you’ll see what I mean.

TW/CW: Mentions of death, implied animal death, mentions/visual altered body parts. (I’ll probably add more later if asked to add it)

Hope y’all enjoy. Also I apologize if it ends up being short. Writing isn’t my strong suit. :\

———

The compact snow was deceptively deep, nearly dropping Doc to his knees with each step forwards. Many times he almost even rolled backwards, barely avoiding a long and steep drop to his death. It was a miracle he could even climb this far, or that there was more to still climb. His vision faded for a moment before he jerked back upright, shaking the snow off his back. He couldn’t risk any breaks or to slow down, ‘less he wants to become a Docsicle.

That was in fact, a terrible joke for a terrible moment and even he was aware of it. But the small chuckle meant his lungs were still getting are and he hadn’t gone fully numb yet.

He pulled himself up to the edge of the hill, looking around with shielded eyes. Everything was barren and the only thing even at the peak was a crown of rocky walls encircling a large and flat field of snow. You’d think that this would mean finding Grian would be easy, but with the terrible fog and sharp waves of snow he could barely even see the shadows of said rock walls.

He skirted around the outside of the field, marking each slope down the peak and fully stopping one side due to a frozen over carcass. How anything got to even spawn up here was a mystery, but considering his friend was supposedly in the area it wasn’t unlikely. Still, a llama this far up? It would take an extremely dumb creature to search for food up here. From the corner of his eye, he notices a bit of a shine under the mix of frost and white fur. Slowly, he brushed them back, color fading from his face at the sight.

Well, at least he knew it was a trader llama. What he didn’t really expect were the jagged claw marks buried into the spinal area of the poor thing. Whatever it was, it hadn’t finished the kill properly, as the carcass was still fresh despite the ice and the creature itself only had a bitemark by the base of its neck.

Wait.

Oh no.

He ran toward the center of the field, abandoning the llama. He could faintly see a blood trail leading to a shadowy silhouette, bunched up and moving slightly. Despite how cold his face was, he could smell the fresh scent of a kill in that direction. As he neared, he could recognize a dull but still bright red sweater, tattered in the back. Carefully, he slowed down and approached the person he’d been searching for, his words caught in his throat. He almost doubted himself as he spoke, watching the figure turn to him and hiss at him.

Grian’s body twitched as he positioned himself between Doc and the dead trader, crushing their ribs in the process. It was very clear that he couldn’t actually see Doc with the eyes on his face, but instead had to move his wings at angles to see. The purple eyes sharpened as they locked on the newcomer, making Grian peel off from the kill he’d been feeding on.

Doc didn’t hesitate to run as Grian launched himself at where he’d been standing, a spray of spit and blood splashing the ground around him. He didn’t need to glance back to tell he was being pursued, the loud snarling and crushing of snow behind him was a pretty good sign.

Although it was a bad thought, Doc was kind of glad Grian didn’t spawn somewhere like the end or had an elytra. If his wings had the extra power, he was sure that he’d have already been caught and torn to shreads.

He reached the side of the peak and slipped, sliding down a few yards before rolling out of the way as Grian again threw himself at the spot Doc was last at. When missing his mark, the hermit let out a roar that threatened to send the snow crashing down. The action gave Doc an idea.

One that he might regret later.

“Hey! Over here!”

Grian turned his head sharply to the noise, baring his teeth. He blindly rushed after the target, getting narrowly close to digging his claws into the mad man’s leg as a result for his taunting.

Okay. Maybe don’t do that.

Doc kept his quick pace down the mountain, his adrenaline being the main thing stopping him from falling over and succumbing to the snow. He had to make it to the bottom, or at least to the half way point. On his way up, he’d passed a ravine. If he could make it there, he could maybe live to see another day and risk coming back for Grian when more prepared.

He kept zig zagging through his old footsteps, reaching the drop faster than expected. Quickly, he pulled out a rope and tied it around one of his arms. It was definitely going to hurt, but that would be a problem for future him. He took a few shaky steps back, glanced at Grian rapidly approaching, then sprinted over the ledge, throwing the rope out at a few rocks on the other side.

He screamed in pain as the rope secured in place, his arm dislocating in the process but otherwise he was safe. He spun around as he heard Grian screech, the creature lunging out at him. He succeeded in hooking his claws into his leg, burning the flesh with the terrible coldness from said claws. Doc almost lost his hold on the rope but managed to kick Grian off before he could be taken down with him.

He winced as Grian screamed, landing at the bottom with a loud thud. He was concerned until he saw the other slowly get back up, seemingly unharmed despite the visible broken twist in one of his wings. The two made eye contact for a while before Doc muttered an apology.

Then he screamed as loud as he could.

He forced himself out of the ravine as fast as he could, watching the vibrations of his echo stir the already loose snow from the hill. Almost beautifully, all of it came crashing down in an avalanche, rolling into the ravine and slowly filling it. He didn’t stay to watch it finish, limping quickly back down the mountain. He had to get to Ren. He’d probably get a yelling about the chat, but they could return later.

As soon as he was gone and the avalanche had settled, a bit of snow shifted. A bloodied hand tore out of the top, followed by the rest of the hermit. Grian wheezed and hissed quietly as he adjusted to the different pressure of this lower elevation. Shifting his still working wing, he surveyed the area to look for his quarry.

There. A lone greenish figure moving down the snow. He could also spot a faint trail of smoke dancing up from behind a hill.

The green one can wait.

He was curious about the smoke, and he wondered what, or who, was the cause of it.

Besides.... they might be a better meal to feast on before he finished off the green one.

[drwcn]

@cloudyfromoobsession​

Hi! :) 

On the topic of talking in third person when referring to yourself, it is actually quite prevalent in cdrama, especially the historical ones, but it never shows up in translation because well... it sounds really weird in English and often there is no direct translation. So most translators just do away with it. 

In modern spoken Chinese, third person speech is no longer used (in fact it would be very weird if you did), so below is only pertaining to historical or fantasy dramas.

If I could insert my personal opinion on the matter: there’s no need to use third person speech in English. Chinese third person speech is incredibly nuanced depending on context and person, and it is incredibly easy to misuse it in English. Writers end up not conveying their intentions and actually making things really awkward. As someone who is fully bilingual, I personally find that third person speech, when used in excess, makes the writing stilted. Another example is Lan Wangji’s “concise speech” which I see very often. It does not work in English. It makes him sound like he doesn’t know how to speak properly and is grammatically incorrect. Chinese is a language that is designed to be able to be shortened in certain ways and still follow all its grammatical rules. English’s syntax does not work the same way at all.  Speech is a major contributor to a fictional character’s personality. Sometimes those subtleties cannot be transposed directly from Chinese to English. To still capture the character when writing in English, each writer has different ways of doing this, but personally I like to keep Lan Wangji’s speech - for the most part - simple and concise. No complex or compound sentences but all his sentences should still obey the grammatical rules of English. 

Okay, onto third person speech, since I find it interesting and it’s like a cool language quirk. 

NOTE: below is about referring to oneself in the third person. Referring to someone else in the third person is a whole thing on its own. 

The “talking in third” person you’re probably referring to stems from the episode when LWJ got drunk with One Braincell Trio, and the next morning he went to his uncle and said 忘机知错 or 忘机有错. I can’t remember specifically which one he said, but essentially it means “Wangji knows his faults” or  “Wangji is at fault”. Using one’s own name to speak in third person is actually less common than some of the other examples I will explain below. There are many ways to speak in third person depending on the situation, your position and the person you are talking to.

Before I do that, I’d that to point out that the pronoun “I” 我 is seen as rude or not following etiquette if you use it inappropriately with people who you shouldn’t be using “I” with. For example, a girl entering the palace to serve as a maid will be trained to stop using “I” when she is speaking with nobility, royalty and anyone of higher rank than he. She will in fact be verbally corrected by her supervisor (and may even be punished)  if she used “I” inappropriately. A palace maid’s “noun” that she will use in place of “I” is nubi 奴婢. Instead of saying 我不知到 “I don’t know”, she will say  奴婢不知 “nubi does not know.” 

Notice the grammar issue that we’re presented with. Because there are no verb conjugation changes in Chinese, substituting “I” with another noun doesn’t change what happens to the verb in Chinese, but in English, you have to make conjugation changes. This makes dialogues sound even more weird in English. 

“I” can be used amongst friends, close siblings, family (with exceptions) individuals or colleagues of relatively equal ranking or (sometimes) strangers on the street. Children, especially civilian children, almost always use “I”. As a general rule, civilians mostly use “I” with each other, it’s only when they speak to someone of rank that they switch their pronoun to a "non-I” noun. Also! Chinese doesn’t differentiate between the subject ‘I’ and the object ‘me’. They are both 我 “wo”, so both “I” and “me” are affected in the same way when switching to a ‘non-I’ noun. 

So now I will list some of the “nouns” that are used in place of “I” in c-dramas. They will be listed in categories based on people’s station in life. 

It’s important to note that Chinese can and is spoken passively, especially in old speech and in dramas. You won’t get the same flack for not using “active tone” the way you do in English. In fact, using “I” or “you” in old Chinese speech actually makes it sound informal. However, this again is one of those language quirks that doesn’t translate and can’t really be transposed. When writing in English, when in doubt, always follow English’s grammatical rules and syntax practices.  

I have no degree in Chinese history or even East Asian studies. These are just some of the commonly used terms I’ve seen over many, many years of drama watching. Sometimes, drama gets it wrong, and these misconceptions will get passed to the audience, but it’s not like we’re submitting manuscripts for academic publication, so does it really matter if it’s slightly inaccurate? 

Citizens, when talking to Officials, Royalty or the Emperor: 

1) cao min 草民 - “grass” “citizen”  2) min nv 民女 - “citizen” “woman”  3) min fu 民妇 - “citizen” “married woman” 

An average jo farmer when speaking with any government official or nobility or royalty including the Emperor will use cao’min to refer to themselves. Cao’min is gender neutral, so both men and women, old or young can use it. For example: “M’lord, I didn’t kill anyone!” -> “���人，草民没有杀人!”

“min’nv” on the other hand is used exclusively by women, usually younger women, while “min’fu” is used exclusively by older married women. The context of their usage is the same as cao’min. Both married and unmarried women can use cao’min as well. (nv is a weird word isn’t it? It’s because there is literally no alphabet to make the 女 sound. The closest we can get is nu, but that’s actually another word, so pinyin uses nv to as substitution.)

Notice, all three of these nouns are actually more... “formal”, as in these are the nouns people will know to use when they are being brought before a local judiciary court, or being called to testify before the Emperor himself. In a street setting, nouns #4 and #5 are usually used. 

Sidenote: da’ren  大人 is an honorific that can be used for any government official that holds some kind of public office or police status. A citizen can use “da’ren” with officials as high as the prime minister all the way down to their local mayor or even just the guards patrolling town. A lower official refers to his superior as {Last-name-da’ren}, and a higher official ALSO refers to their subordinates (who are not close friends of his) as {Last-name da’ren}. More nuances apply but generally these are the rules. 

Worker/Trades person/Citizen, when talking to someone of higher class and wealth: 

4) xiao de 小的 - “of little”  5) xiao ren 小人 - “little” “person”

Example: Wei Wuxian and Lan Wangji walks into an inn, the busboy greets them and says: Chinese:  “二位公子，[小的]是这里的小二，二位打尖还是住店？”  English: “Young masters, [xiao’de] is the busboy/waiter of this place. Would you like to take your meal here or check in for the night?” or basically “Hi! I am your waiter and I’ll be helping you today. Are we eating or checking in?” 

Adults of Scholar/Gentries Status/Martial Artists in Pugilist Society/Cultivators: 

6) zai xia 在下 - “is here” “lower”  7) wan bei 晚辈 - “later” “generation” 8) di zi 弟子 - disciple 9) lao sheng 老身 - “old” “body” 

zai xia - The thing with old Chinese speech is that it inherently is overly politely. In many many cases, you always put yourself in the lower status when speaking to a stranger of unknown status because you don’t want offend the person you don’t know. Zaixia can be used by men, women, usually not too old. If you’re a senior man or woman you usually default to 9).  Example: two cultivators who’ve never met fought off a ghoul together. After the fact, they introduce themselves. One of them says: “在下云梦江氏魏��羡， 多谢仙友相助。”  Meaning translation: “I am Wei Wuxian of the Yunmeng Jiang Clan. Thank you so much for your help.” Literal translation： “[zai’xia] Yunmeng Jiang Clan Wei Wuxian. Much thanks cultivator friend for help.”  This entire sentence contains neither ”I” nor “you”. But that’s just not... feasible to talk like that in English. 

wan bei is used in CQL. Ex: A disciple of Yunmeng Jiang may refer to themselves as wan bei when speaking to a senior of another sect. When a disciple is speaking to a senior of their own sect, they will use “di zi” (disciple). 

Family:

10). xiao xu 小婿 - “little” “son in law”  11). hai er 孩儿 - “child”  12). sun nv 孙女， sun er 孙儿 - “granddaughter” , “grandson” *there are more, but I’m use putting these up for examples*

In most families, there’s no need to refer to yourself in the third person. You’re family, just use “I”. But! In certain high society families, the rules are stricter and etiquette is everything. For example, places like Cloud Recesses with a stick up its collective butt would probably follow these rules. If Lan Wangji’s parents were still alive, he’d refer to himself as “hai er” to his parents. He would also refer to himself as “xiao xu” to Cangse and Wei Changze if they were alive. In Story of Minglan, Minglan refer to herself as “sun nv” when she’s speaking with her grandmother. 

Government Officials

13). bei zhi 卑职  14). xia guan 下官 both of these mean the same thing “subordinate”.  People use it when speaking to their superiors. Foot soldiers in the military will use 13, not 14. 

15). wei chen 微臣  {wei chen} is used SOLELY with the royal family. If you are a government official of ANY rank, when speaking to the emperor, empress, dowager empress, you must use wei chen in formal settings. To a prince or princess or a royal concubine, government official can use 14 xia guan. Using “I” in front of royalty is very disrespectful. Exceptions do apply, but this is the overarching rule. 

臣 - the word “chen” means subject. The term 君臣 refers to the special relationship of respect that exists between 君 the emperor, and 臣 the people who work on his behalf and whom he rules. 

Royalty 16). zhen 朕 - no translation This is a special pronoun used ONLY by the Emperor and he uses zhen a lot. Like, there is no need for him to be humble or whatever and avoid using pronouns. It is his “I” and he can use it as freely as he likes. 

17). ben gong 本宫 - “self” “palace”  An Empress or a concubine of higher status (ie. a Noble Consort) use this to refer to themselves when they are talking to anyone of lower rank: citizens, servants, a government official, or a lower concubine. This places them in a position of power. Everyone who they’re using ben gong with should be lower than them in ranking. Remember when I said using “I” is rude, well in this case, a noble consort will not use “I” with a servant because she is more noble them, and they not “noble enough” for her to use “I” with. If it’s her close servants, her confidants, she can and often do use “I”, as a sign of familiarity.  

18). pin qie 嫔妾, chen qie 臣妾  Lower concubines use “pin qie” and higher concubines use “chen qie” when speaking to the Emperor, Empress or Dowager Empress. The Empress uses “chen qie” when speaking to the Emperor or Dowager Empress. When chen qie or pin qie is used, the speaker is in a lower position than the person they’re speaking to. 

19). er chen 儿臣 Princes and Princesses will use “er chen” with their fathers (the Emperor). In front of their mothers (Empress or concubine) and grandmothers, they usually use “I” or 11 “hai er”. If it’s a formal situation, they will switch to “er chen”. An Emperor will also refer to himself as “er chen” when speaking to his mother the Empress Dowager. 

20). ben wang 本王 - “self” “lord/duke” An Emperor’s sons, brothers or male cousins are often qinwangs or junwangs (princes, lords, dukes). They will use “ben wang” to refer to themselves in formal settings to any one who is lower than them. In informal settings, they will use “I”. In formal setting when they’re talking to the Emperor, sons of the Emperors will use 19 “er chen”, brothers of Emperors may use “chen di” 臣弟, and cousins or more distant relatives will be simply “chen” or 15 “wei chen”. 

21). ai jia 哀家 - “sad” “family”  Empress Dowagers: literally the most respected and highest ranking person in any Chinese dynasty. She might not have any real power, but by rank she kneels to absolutely no one. No exceptions. Not even to her son who is the Emperor. He kneels to her. An Empress Dowager will use “ai jia” when she wants to be more formal, but to her family with whom she is close, she can and do use “I”. 

Lastly, Jiang Cheng gets a special mention: 

When Lan Wangji and Lan Xichen bring Wei Wuxian to Jinlintai at around ep 41, Jiang Cheng, being a total shit disturber says, “不知是那位名士大能，可否为江某引荐一番？”

Translation: “Who is this famous and talented cultivator? Could you introduce him to me?” 

But lemme break that sentence down for you. 

可否 = can or not 为 = for  江某 = Jiang “mou”  引荐一番 = make introduction. 

He does not make use of “him” “you” or “me”. In English, when speaking in the imperative mood, aka, “put the dishes in the dish washer”, it is implied that ‘you’ are the person putting the dishes in the dish washer. Similarly, the ‘him’ and ‘you’ are implied in Jiang Cheng’s sentence, and the only “pronoun” he uses when referring to himself is “jiang mou”. If Jiang Cheng had used “you” or “him” in his sentence, it would’ve been ruder. As is, his sentence was still (albeit falsely) courteous. 

The ‘third person’ speech in this context is the use of 江某 “jiang mou”. It is a fairly neutral third person noun. Unlike the above 21 examples, ‘mou’ doesn’t place a person in a position higher or lower than the person they’re talking to. They’re just saying “hey I am a person with the last name Jiang”. It is gender neutral and can be used by both men and women. It’s not limited to cultivators. Scholars can use it, nobility can use it, government officials can use it. (Your average farmer... probably doesn’t use it, because it’s just... not used.) 

So that’s it. 

There are definitely MORE nouns that are used in third person. These are some of the commonly seen ones. I hope it helps. 

Again, this word vomit I just wrote is for general interest. It is absolutely not necessary to use it when writing fics in English. When in doubt, stick to using pronouns the way we would normally. 

[allykakamatsu]

Hypothetical P5A

Okay, gonna make this clear right up front, I wanted to make this post for a while but the main reason I decided to do it now is because the Atlus announcement thing is almost here, and also cause I saw a video on this topic by Thorgi’s Arcade (go watch it btw it’s good) and while I agree with a lot of what he said, there’s also some things I’d change, not just cause I disagree, but also cause I think it would be fun. Anyway enough beating around the bush, let’s do this

Gameplay

I’m a firm believer in the phrase, if it ain’t broke, don’t fix it, and the Arena games are already really good so not much to change. That being said, I still wanna change some things. First off though, we are keeping this 1 vs 1, no tag team matches. The arena games already have a lot of Mechanics going on and trying to keep everything as well as some new stuff WHILE adding a tag team button, yeah no let’s not outside of maybe a bonus mode.

This means I can’t add Batton Pass in as a new mechanic to represent P5, but I have a solution, that being Technicals. Status ailments already exist in this game, so how about when you inflict one and do a specific combo you do more damage, also providing risk vs reward as the player with the status will have a better idea of what the opponent will do making them more predictable. Also as for Persona’s, mostly everyone’s will be fully evolved, minus Yu cause him getting a final boss persona normally is a tad to OP, meanwhile the P5 characters will have their starting Persona’s, but they will evolve for big moves, like awakened mode supers and instant kills

I’m also borrowing Thorgi’s Arcade idea of having supports giving a slight buff in battle, like if you pick Fuuka your meter can build faster for a bit, meanwhile if you pick Futaba you’ll get an attack and defence buff. It’s the fairest way to include them without having to make them playable. I know Rise is already playable but this roster is going to have to be small as it is, and being a support doesn’t mean you can’t be DLC later.

Also, we’re not bringing back the Shadow Characters, just, we are not dealing with the likes of Shadow Naoto again.

:readmore:

Story

I am about to cop out a bit here, but Thorgi’s Arcade video had a really good idea for the story so I’ll just link it here https://youtu.be/yyB5rEM9UVU

To summarise for people who don’t want to watch, Nyarlathotep, the main villain from the Persona 2 games, has been gaining strength from all the suffering humanity has gone through due to 3, 4 and 5, and has gained enough strength to create a new Joker to try finish what he started and destroy the world. Mitsuru might think the Phantom Thieves are behind it cause this is clearly persona related and the fact that the leader of the PT’s is also named Joker is public knowledge, Naoto gets largely the same idea, Katsuya and Maya decide to have their own investigation, meanwhile the Phantom Thieves are trying to prove their innocence and help save the world. Nice excuse to bring everyone together, but who will the everyone be?

Base Roster

Okay, I know the dream is getting everyone from Ultimax back plus the new P5 characters, but given Arc System’s standard for small base rosters, I’m not holding my breath. The ideal would be everyone plus who I’m about to say for P2 and P5, but I’m keeping it… somewhat realistic. Anyway onto the actual size, 16 seems fair enough. One more than the most recent Guilty Gear game for a series that had pretty big success so that sound fair enough. Let’s get the obvious out of the way though, all the base 8 Phantom Thieves besides Futaba are making the cut

Okay so that’s obvious but how will they play? Starting off with Ren/Joker, Smash Bros already laid a great foundation with him being very fast on the ground and in the air plus being great at combos, so I see no reason to change that. Also no need for him to be a Jack of all trades either cause spoilers, Yu is coming back and he already fills that role.

As for the others, Ryuji I can see being a slugger charge hybrid. Basically starting out he hits pretty hard but is a bit on the slow side to compensate, but just like any good athlete, give him a chance to warm up, ie do a charge input, and he becomes a lot faster and has better combo potential. Or we could make him a toned down version of Little Mac where he’s great on the ground but he’s in trouble the second aerial combat is involved. Then there’s Morgana who with his ability to turn into cars and the fact he introduces thief tools like smoke bombs, I can see him being a faster but frailer successor to Teddie.

Then there’s Ann who, no doubt, she’s a Zoner, and with her fire she’ll be Yukiko’s sort of successor. However instead of healing, I’d implement the fact that she learns concentrate and have it so the more she charges it up, the stronger her attacks get, but the Meter will gradually go down over the match. Yusuke, as tempting as it is to cop out and say ‘have him play like Vergil in Marvel vs Capcom’, I have a different idea. Namely, take advantage of the fact that Yusuke can learn counter by having him be the defensive specialist, set up ice traps to freeze the opponent, and if they get close, he can either counter or go for some combos.

Then there’s Makoto who would definitely be a grappler. I mean, she practices Aikido and is really strong, she can 100% pull it off. Finally Haru…… TANK! I mean come on, Haru wields an axe, has a grenade launcher, and Melady is literally a dancing tank in a pink dress, it just makes too much sense. I’d also give her a bit of armor cause if she’s slow she at least needs a chance to get her attacks in.

Okay so that’s 7 out of our 16 slots down, and given that one slot will have to be saved for the Evil Joker who would be the villain, we’re halfway done with 3 games to go, lord help me.

Okay, starting this off with P4, I’m gonna give them more than the others purely because they were the focus of the originals and there’s less realistic cuts I can make compared to 2 and 3. To make things simple, every returning character would play the same, and as for the ones I’d bring back for the base roster, we’ve got Yu, Yosuke, Chie and Naoto. Why them specifically? Well Yu is the main character, Naoto being a detective would basically mean she’d be the one getting everyone involved in the first place, Chie is currently training to be a cop as confirmed in P5 so her getting called in makes sense, and Yosuke is the best investigator after Yu and Naoto, he’s always up for a mystery and the second he learns Yu is involved he’s joining in. I just couldn’t cut him.

Now before the really painful cuts, Persona 2 is really easy. Out of Innocent Sin party members, by the end of the series Maya is the only one left with a Persona, and Katsuya is not only older brother of Innocent Sin’s protag Tatsuya, but he’s also pretty important and a detective so he’s definetly the one Maya’s dragging into this. As for how they play, they both use guns like Naoto, but how I’d mix them up is with Katsuya, I’d let him attack while moving (unlike Naoto who has so stay still to fire) at the cost of less combo potential, meanwhile Maya dual wields her guns so she’ll probably play like Noel Vermillion from BlazBlue where she’d more or less just use the guns to get longer reach melee attacks instead of shooting.

Now, for the hard part. There’s only 2 slots left, one of them basically has to go to Mitsuru (not that I’m complaining I’d probably add her anyway) meaning now I have to choose between the rest of the Shadow Operatives/SEES for the last slot. I narrowed it down to the 3 that were in the original Arena cause they’re the most plot relevant, but that still meant I had to choose between Akihiko and Aigis. I ended up deciding on Aigis though cause A, with Labrys not making the base roster someone has to represent the robots of the series, and B, with Akihiko currently pulling a Ryu by travelling to get stronger, it makes more sense that Aigis would be closer and easier for Mitsuru to call up. Honestly I was tempted to bump the roster up to 17 so I could have both of them on the base roster, but this is ArcSystems, 16 is already kinda pushing it.

DLC

Given that this is a modern fighting game, DLC is inevitable. However since this DLC will likely be like Ultimax where the story acts to wrap up loose ends and have a new story, it’s going yo be big, especially since there’s going to be a fight with Nyaraloptep, so go big or go home in this case. Okay so first order of business, anyone who was in the previous arena games who wasn’t in the base roster is getting added back in, it’s only fair. That out of the way, the new faces I’d add are Futaba actually being playable now and the big 4 P5 characters I skipped, Akechi, Yoshizawa, and Sophie. Before anyone asks though, Sophie was added into a Dragalia Lost collab with Koei Techmo not being credited so she’s likely Atlus’s copyright so she's safe to add.

With that out of the way, how would they play? Starting with Futaba, I’d think she’d be the resident puppet fighter, sitting on top of Necinomicon and only occasionally adding in some of her own attacks like a projectile. Also she'd also probably act as a bit of a grappler cause her Persona has tentacles (no hentai jokes please) which have long reach so that'll be perfect for it. Next up is Akechi who I can see as semi being two characters in one. My basic idea is that at first Akechi will be fighting with Robin Hood and he'll be a solid jack of all trades with a slight focus on rush down. However once he goes into his awakened mode he'll gain Loki, which will increase his speed and attack strength, at the cost of his defence, turning him into a glass cannon.

Next is Yoshizawa, or 'Sumi as I like to call her, and her thing will be she's the mobility focused fighter, namely constantly moving around the stage and poking at her opponent while doing it, at the cost of being frail. Finally there’s Sophie who would be a combo focused zoner, as in her standard projectiles (the yo-yo’s) wouldn’t hurt that much on their own, but she can string them together into the fancy yo-yo tricks to potentially do big damage. As for how much this DLC would cost, it’s going to be very big, so €25 to €30 sounds fair

I think that more or less covers my thoughts. I could keep going on about this for a while, but I think this is a good place to stop. Hope you like my idea!

[rwbyvein]

Firen Lhain:  Chapter 808:  Coffee:  Part II / III

Jaune stood up from the couch and grumbled, causing Yang and Blake to fall in together, nearly hitting their heads.

"Dude?" Yang asked. "A little warning."

"He did shift around quite a few times to warn us." Blake added.

"You fell down too?"

"Just because I knew he was standing up, doesn't mean I wanted to let him."

"Okay, Contrary, same." Yang replied, head looking over Blake's. "Still curious."

"Two girls I want to hug." Jaune.

"I had better be one of them." Yang added, and Blake raised her hand without raising her head.

"Good answer, but no." Jaune said, as he stretched. Yang dropped her head back down.

"Are you going to tell us, who?" Blake asked.

"Weiss's sister, and, well, our remaining prisoner."

"Why?" Blake asked, "Specifically."

"Because she's in pain." Jaune stated, "And I might be the only one who can help her with it."

"She did you, you know?" Yang asked, "Beacon."

"She was forced to." Jaune stated.

"Says who?" Yang asked.

"The fact she tried to kill Cinder." Jaune stated, as he looked at her. "She lost someone, and blames Cinder for it. And, at the moment, the only thing that is holding her together is that hatred."

"And you know this, because?" Yang asked, whereas Blake already seemed to believe him.

"If I didn't have people who depended on me..." Jaune voice and paused. He then leaned down to kisses his wives on the lips before standing back up.

Yang sat up. "Instead you did everything you could to save us. I don't know what I would have done, if you hadn't... I mean... I wouldn't even eat..."

Blake then snuggled up to Yang as she sat up, "And now someone else needs his help." She kissed Yang on the cheek.

"Go get her, Ladykiller." Yang said. "Just don't, you know, Ladykill her."

Jaune turned to walk away. "It's not like I've got four wives and maybe a couple more on the way before even getting there." he said as he walked out of the room.

* * *

"You hear that?" Nora asked, as loud footfalls could be heard on the stairs. Neo looked at her curiously. "That our glorious leader coming to hug you." Neo gave her a disbelieving glare as the shadow of Jaune's antlers could be seen clearly. A moment later he appeared in full. He walked right over to her, turned sideways to slip into the part of the cell he had ripped the bars off from. She looked at him towering over her.

"Stand up." he firmly, forcely said to her, and she quickly, nervously complied. Before she knew what was happening, she was pulled into a hug, the warmest, most powerful hug she had ever had. When he finally let her go, she had to breathe deeply just to catch her breath. "So, now?" Jaune said, "I healed Cinder." he said, and Neo scowled at him, "And she left." he added, and she at first she gave him a teppid look, and then a confused look, and then a questioning look. "Don't know, don't care. REALLY don't care. She's gone. Hopefully we'll never see her again. One thing I do know, or believe, is that she is done with Salem, thereby taking away Salem's most powerful piece." Neo gave him a glare. "I know you want to kill her, and that's not going to happen. And, you know Pyrrha, right?" He asked, and she gave him a knowing look. "You know what happened to her?" he asked, and she gave him a questioning look. "DO YOU THINNK I WANTED TO HELP HER?!" he shouted, and she cowered from the shock of it. "EVERY PART OF ME WANTS TO RIP HER APART!"

Neo breathed in deep to recenter herself before looking back him. She gave him a questioning look.

"Because it won't bring her back!, that's why." Jaune replied. "Pyrrha is dead, and there's nothing we can do about it. Roman is dead, and there's nothing we can do about it." Panic appeared on Neo's face, bargaining, fear, hatred, anger, ire, and loss. She gave him a questioning look. "I have people to look out for." Jaune stated. "I don't know why they follow me."

"You are our glorious leader!" Nora shouted.

"That's not a reason." he said to Nora.

"You give us centre." Ren said with a smile. Jaune shrugged his shoulders before looking back at Neo.

"I know you think you're alone, but that's because you want to be."

She gave him a look of hate and ire that bit to his core.

"I know what it's like to push away people because you don't think you're good enough for them." he said, and she looked like she wanted to stab him. He looked at her for a moment, "I'm not afraid to hug you." he said, and she jumped back, holding her hands out towards him. "One down, one to go." he said, and Neo looked at him questioningly, without lowering her hands. "You're not the only one I want to hug, today."

"Is it me?!" Nora asked, and Jaune rolled his syes. He then walked over to them. Nora jumped to her feet, while Ren swiftly stood up as well. He pulled the two of them into a hug before letting them go.

* * *

Jaune opened the door and walked into the hangar, closing it behind him He found Weiss seated outside the airship, with noises coming from within. "Jaune-dear?" Weiss asked.

"Just had something I wanted to say to your sister." Jaune said, and the noises turned into footfalls moving to the rear of the airship.

Winter appeared on the ramp, "Yes?" she asked, only to find herself being pulled into a hug by Jaune. He let her go and she nervously stepped back, fixing her uniform.

"We haven't had much time to spend together," he said to her, "and I might not understand everything about your relationship, but Weiss loves you, respects you, and likely wouldn't be Weiss without you."

With this Weiss was glowing a radioactive light blue, while Winter a much more teppid one.

"And you..." Winter voiced and paused, "As well." She then straightened herself up. "Weiss speaks very highly of you. If I understand correctly, she would not be here without you." With this Weiss clutched her stomach where she had been impaled. "You have my thanks." Winter said to him.

"And my love." Weiss said with love dripping in her voice. Winter looked at her radiant glow as she controlled her emotions to vanquish her own.

* * *

Weiss walked down the stairs passed the library and ran into Yang on the ground floor. "Hey, Linnet, how'd it go?"

"Oh?" Weiss replied, as the two moved towards the garden, "I had a lovely chat with my sister. And then Jaune-dear..."

"Hm?" Yang asked.

"Oh?" Weiss asked, "He came in and... hugged her."

"Wait?" Yang asked, and Weiss breathed out with relief. "Does this mean we can just hug your sister?"

Weiss let out a weak scoff, "I do not know what it means."

"Because it SOUNDS like we can hug your sister."

Weiss let out an uneasy utterance. "I would ask you to respect my sister's retiscence."

"Okay, I'm not going to hug her all the time."

"Thank you." Weiss stated.

"But I am going to hug her."

"If you must." Weiss quipped.

Yang stepped forward to open the door. "So, what are we up to?" she asked.

"I figured we could spend some time in our fallow garden, thinking of the future." Weiss replied.

"Alright, I'm in." Yang eagerly said.

"I figured as much." Weiss said with a smile and a light blue flush, while Yang developed her own orange one.

* * *

Blake sat on a parapet, looking down at Ruby on the tower's roof. "So, what did you want to talk about?"

Ruby pulled out her scythe and planted the base into the group, emphatically pointing at her. "I want to learn to vanish mysteriously, like you do."

Blake developed a chesire grin before it turned into a questioning look. "You do understand that your Semblance is a lot more obvious than mine, right?"

"I can do it!" Ruby exclaimed, and Blake's grin returned.

"Look away for a moment." Blake said to her, and Ruby looked away for a split second, and when she looked back, Blake had disappeared. She saw something, somewhere, though she could not pin it down. It wasn't until Blake stopped that Ruby could fully see her, and turned to look at her. "The moment your opponent looks away is when they are the most vulnerable. They are forcing their eyes away from you, and once they start, it's a lot harder to stop."

"And then what?" Ruby asked.

"And then you move out of their line of sight, or stay in their peripheral vision." Blake stated, "The vision on the sides of your eyes sees movement, but not colour, and not focus."

"You mean how you can kind of see someone standing next to you, but not really?"

"Exactly." Blake stated, and turned black. Ruby looked around for a moment before turning to the right and looking Blake in the eyes. Blake moved in to kiss her on the lips before turning black again. Ruby looked around to see her perched up atop one of the parapets. "My Semblance makes it easier, but do you know how it really works?" Blake asked.

"You turn black, but it's not you?" Ruby asked.

"Their eyes are focused on my shadow, not me." Blake stated. "While they are looking at something else, I can move around the sides of their vision."

"What can I do?" Ruby asked.

"Use your cape and roses to distract people, then move from somewhere other than there." Blake said to her. Ruby grabbed her cape, looking at it. "Twirl your cape." Blake stated, and Ruby twirled her cape around.

"Like this?"

"Now?" Blake said, and paused. When Ruby looked where she was she found her missing. Again, she found Blake beside her and quickly turned to look at her. Again, Blake gave her a quick kiss. "The moment you are hidden by your cape is the moment to strike."

"By strike you mean?" Ruby asked.

"I honestly don't know how your Semblance works, can you leave your cape visible?"

"I've never really tried." Ruby stated.

"Even for a moment?" Blake asked.

[icipersona5-pricefamily]

Who are your Top 5 fave Phantom Thieves of Hearts?

It could be just one or two, but sometimes you can't help it, but to love all of them. But there's always a fave or two and sadly a dislike. But let's focus on the top faves. Honestly for me... it's hard to chose. I mean I have my two faves, but do I have my top 5 faves? 🤔 Hmm... well, most do share the same spots... And please don't be mad at choices! 🙏 We all can't like the same the thing or person after all. Anyway! I will expose my top 5 and be warn, there are spoilers, so I advise you not to look at the list until you played the games or seen the walk through. If you like to spoil yourself, go ahead....

5. Sophia/Sophie. Why her? Well, she's adorable and an AI who has a Persona. She's not the first technology thing to have one, of course. But I like her plot and how she's trying to learn what a heart is. She has YoYo as her weapon which is cool and despite many let downs, she had learn from her teammates and understand what it means to be a Phantom Thief of Hearts. As the story goes, she was slowly losing her robot like voice and to find out how she was created! I like it! I'm gonna miss her...

4. Futaba Sakura/Oracle (Navi in Japan). Why? I just like her personalities and how she's a great hacker while trying to be outgoing. (You can do it, Futaba!). She's funny and I love her siblings relationship with Ren/MC and Yusuke. Her past was so sad and I just wanna hug her. I am glad she has an adopted dad like Sojiro and how she was willing to change her heart to save him. I'm really glad in Royal she has her victory pose after the all out attack. I just wish she'd had one in Strikers when things are looking bad, she actives her showtime to fully heal the HP and SP. PS, I love her UFO like Persona!!

3. Yusuke Kitagawa/Fox. I love this dork! He is beautiful, such a soul of an artist and kinda gullible in most things. He's a sweetie and never miss an opportunity to art. What happened to him in the past and in P5, I wanna protect him. I'm glad the Phantom Thieves came in to help and he becomes one. His relationship with Futaba is funny. They're like siblings to each other (Sorry to those who shipped them!). And he's sort of the first for Futaba to interact with. I do worry about his money situation, but he seems to be doing okay. I really wish Atlus added that you could date guys, I mean they made you date older women, but not a guy at close age to? O.o Anyway, Yusuke is a funny and sweet guy, kinda naive but a good guy. Kudos to the voice actors, both English and Japanese.

2. Morgana/Mona & Ryuji Sakamoto/Skull. Eh? Two?! Hey, it's hard to chose, okay? =3= Now why? Let's start with Morgana... He's a talking cat and he's adorable! (Morgana: I'm NOT a cat) Hehe... Anyway! He's like a mascot yet he's strong and wise in most situations. Despite being a cat in the real world, he still hangouts with the team to join in the fun. I love how he's smitten over Ann yet acts like a gentleman (sometimes) towards her and the fact he can become a bus (and helicopter in Royal) is awesome! I feel bad about when Morgana started to feel useless to the team and no one notice it until Haru appears as a thief. But I am glad he'd came back and to learn his past, wow! I nearly cried at the end of P5. I kinda wish he a human form like Teddie, but at least he kinda did in Royal. And I really wish his cat sprite has more reactions and stuff. The fact his Persona is Zorro... pfft X3c It's like Puss in Boots in Shrek! Now, Ryuji... He's such a good boy with a temper, but he has reasons why. Despite that, he's a good friend and never abandons his friends. Thanks to the MC, he slowly becomes who he should be and I'd a funny guy. I feel bad that his track team treated badly because of what happened and I kinda get it, but still... Anyway! He's like the loyal friend who got your back and is willing to stand up for his friends, even his life to save them. He even didn't judge the MC and becomes his first friend of Shujin Academy. Now, why both on the top fave 2? Well, they always bicker at each other yet they kinda get along sometimes. They both are close to the MC and they're funny like Yosuke and Teddie in P4. Glad their relationship had grew in Strikers and the fact that they are not afraid to blunt insults to each other. At least they're good friends.

Now, the top most fave(s), drum roll please........................

1. Ren Amamiya/Akira Kurusu/Joker & Zenkichi Hasegawa/Wolf. Again another spot is share! And before Strikers, Joker is still my top fave then Zenkichi came in, it's a tied. Let's start with Ren. Ren is handsome! He's cool and mysterious! The plot for him is perfect and how his Persona is Arsene is even more perfect. The background of his shows how hard life is, despite doing something good, he get punish in the end? That's bull crap and everyone treated him like he's a bad boy when he's not. Thankfully, he made friends and people around soon learns he's not a bad boy at all. Ren is charmer and he's still the guy who is willing to help those in need, of course that's up to the player. I do wish in Strikers that it kinda shown his distrust and trauma of the police. I would protect him and make any cops stay a safe distance from him. (Sorry Zenkichi) At least he kinda got his life back thanks to his friends and allies. Did I mention I like him? Seriously I do! 🥰 He's handsome and his smile... Sorry! Now, Zenkichi... This guy is a goof ball, the only adult of Phantom Thieves of Hearts and is a cop! Well, PubSec. He's like Dojima and Sojiro in one, sort of. At first, I did distrust due to he's a cop and all, plus you know in P4 and with Goro. I wasn't sure about him until I had watch the walk through and when first seeing him and when he'd laughed, I thought 'I might like this guy, but let's wait and see'. Now, I thought he would be a comic relief which he sort of is while still not trusting him until we learn he's a dad and how he'd lost his wife which 'Wait! He's a dad and had a wife who was killed in hit and run? Dojima 2?!' OwO I was surprised. Of course, not exactly the same, but similar plot. We get to learn about his past, his relationship with his daughter and why he was using the Phantom Thieves for such case. I start to feel bad for him and his daughter, heck even the Phantom Thieves felt bad. At some point, I did started to like him and Zenkichi was starting to bond with them and they even started to think as him part of the team. Once Zenkichi reveals why he'd hadn't caught the killer, I truly feel bad and understand why he let the killer go. Then boom! He has a Persona that fits him perfectly and such a cool Phantom Thief attire! 😳 That's when I fallen for him 'Dang it! First Joker now him!' He became like a dad of the team, always reminded them that despite what happened to the Monarch, it's still wrong what they're doing now. Despite how old he is (He's in his 40s) he can still fight and is cool! Still a goof ball good looking guy. Now, why both on the same spot? .....I love both them equally! 😍 They're both cool, good looking and those smirks... How dare Atlus did this to me?! I love their Personas. I wish we could see them having bonding moments though. *clears throat* Anyway. Because how I like them, as always I had created OCs to be with them. Hehe 😅

Now, for the rest of Phantom Thieves of Hearts. I do love them all, truly. Makoto is cool and she's the mom of the group. Ann is good friend to hangout, plus she's caring about others who had suffered. Haru is a sweetie who has scary side to her (Do not let her drive). Goro is someone that you wish he had saved sooner and yes I did hate him but I feel bad for what happened to him. Sumire, I wasn't sure about we had learn her background and wow! What a twist. I did call her a hypocrite while I can see why she thought that the people don't help themselves when reality the thieves gives courage and they done something to move on with some help, unlike what she did but I get it and I do like her persona.

Who would I want to be part of the team? Hmm... Hifumi since she was gonna be part of the team, but sadly that was cut off. She would've been better as a thief. Maybe Mishima, maybe! Sojiro... What?! It would've been cool, although he isn't young as he use to be, still. Lastly Maruki. I am surprised he doesn't count to be part of the team, but I guess it's because his Persona was kinda controlling him (I can't remember 😅) and didn't join the team. He would've been a neat addition to team, being a dad/uncle of the group. I feel bad for the guy and I get why did all that yet what about him? Doesn't he deserve to be happy to? Also... what happened to his girlfriend after the Metaverse vanishes in Royal? Anyway, he still like a sweet guy to me and I kinda wish Royal was mentioned in Strikers, but Strikers is technically a sequel/spin off to P5 since Strikers was part of P5, but it was too long and got cut. Hence of no mentioning of Royal.

Whew! Anyway! No hate on this, not everyone agrees with my choices and it's different from everyone opinions. But what about you guys? Got top faves and wish who would've been part of the team??

[k7l4d4]

Kamen Rider Info and Ideas (Feel free to ignore)

As a huge fan of Kamen Rider, I always wondered about ways it could be expanded, and maybe not improved so much as become More. So, right now, I am gonna make a list of Kamen Rider Series, starting with Black and RX, and continuing all the way to the Reiwa Era! Everybody clap your hands!! *Cricket noises* Okay, here we go!

Kamen Rider Black, and its sequel, Black RX, details the journey of Kohtaro Minami, or Minami Kohtaro for those who prefer the traditional Japanese naming conventions, on his mission to defeat Gorgom, an ancient tribe/organization that has evolved into a cultic terrorist organization bent on world domination. While still holding to the Showa era’s tradition of having Cyborg Riders, Black and RX were the first in which, aside from Kamen Rider Amazon, the supernatural played a prominent part in the powers of the riders, as Kohtaro and his stepbrother Nobuhiko were the designated heirs to the leader of Gorgom, the Century King, and infused with the relics that contained his power, the Kingstones. Both Kohtaro and Nobuhiko were infused with the Kingstones, in the attempt to convert them into the Villains Black Sun and Shadow Moon, with only Kohtaro managing to escape.

One of the things that I felt could’ve been at least a little better in regards to the series was if Shadow Moon could regain his original self and rejoin the path of justice. It would’ve also been pretty cool if Shadow Moon gained his own upgraded form, which did actually happen in tie-in novels and manga, and if either or both of them gained the ability to unleash a final form that drew upon the power they wielded as the New Century Kings. Ah well, that’s what fanfiction is for!

Kamen Rider Kuuga details the battles of Yusuke Godai, the successor to the ancient warrior of justice, Riku, as the Kuuga. Kuuga’s powers are derived from Growth, allowing him to access a variety of forms and powers based on what he needs to grow into, and can be bolstered by mystical energy sources to ascend even further! Yusuke’s enemies are the Gurongi tribe, ancient monsters who abandoned their humanity to satisfy their love of death and conflict, and wished to have all of humanity become as dark and twisted as them, with the “honor” of being the Gurongi to start the process going to whichever of them managed to win their tournament, in which the Gurongi Tribal-members all battled to the death as a whole.

One of the things that bugged me a little, was that Kuuga never fully evolved all his forms, and that his true final form was even used in his series! I mean, seriously, what!? Once again, budget concerns limit the awesomeness of a series before it can bloom, sigh.

Kamen Rider Agito is the story of Shoichi Tsugami, a young amnesiac who belongs to an offshoot of the human race known as the Agito. Agitos possess incredible psychic powers and exist in a perpetual state of evolution, adapting to the changes in themselves and the world around them at an incredible rate.

My only real beef with this series was the limited number of forms Agito had as compared to Kuuga, and that one of the Extra Riders had the lazy name of Another Agito. You heard me right. All in all, not to bad, but a little frustrating.

Next up, Kamen Rider Ryuki, which also served as part of the inspiration for the list. Honestly, with how much I plan on covering JUST for Ryuki, I’ll probably leave this off after this and pick up more tomorrow. Ryuki is one of the first series in the franchise to fully exploit the nature of multiple riders, and basically invented the concept of Dark Riders, which I will also explain.

Ryuki involves the Rider War, a conflict taking place in the real world, and a parallel realm known as the Mirror World, populated by unfeeling monsters known as, you guessed it, Mirror Monsters, which must constantly kill when in our world in order to remain stable, or at least they are allegedly supposed to. The Rider War was a conflict set up by a man known as Shiro to revive his dead sister, under the guise of a tournament to the death for a reality-warping wish, which Shiro wanted for himself. The war brought together 13, yes you read that right, 13 Riders, all with variances in their styles and abilities. This selfish conflict is partially, if not entirely why I said that introduced Dark Riders properly to the franchise; Dark Riders are individuals who bear the same transformative powers of Kamen Riders, but instead of using them to fight against the wicked and monstrous, are instead put towards their own selfish ends, and none of them are the type of individual you wanna run into in a dark alley.

The Riders of Ryuki derived their power from two things, their Contract Monster, a Mirror Monster that they formed a bond with in order to exist without needing to bring about death, and an Advent Deck, a Deck of Cards that harnessed the power of the Mirror Monster it bonded to and allowed the Riders to survive in the Mirror Realm, which is inherently fatal for humans to be in. One of the key aspects of Advent Cards is how they work, each one draws and harnesses an aspect of the Contract Monster it is connected to, or wields a power specifically to fight other Advent Riders. Now, before I get to my thoughts and ideas, I am going to list each Rider from Ryuki, as well as the nature of their Advent Decks and fighting styles.

Shinji Kido: Kamen Rider Ryuki himself, and contracted to the fierce Dragon-Type Mirror Monster, Dragonredder. With a Dragon on his side, you’d expect him to be the powerhouse of the group, right? HAHAHAHAHA no. Shinji stumbled upon the Rider War by near-complete accident, and, being the nice guy he is, decided if he was going to be a part, he would protect the bystanders from the conflict and ensure as many of the Riders made it out alive as he could. Easier said than done. Out of all the Riders, Ryuki has the least straight-forward fighting style, not helped by his incredible clumsiness, with his deck emphasizing the ability to have as many options as possible; jack of all trades master of none, but better master of none than master of one.

Ren Akiyama: Kamen Rider Knight, and the contract holder of the Bat-Type Mirror Monster, Darkwing. He comes across as aloof, cold even, whose only in it for himself, but in truth he decided to enter the war to save the life of his ill fiance. Knight’s fighting style blends straight-up direct combat, and subterfuge based war tactics, with his deck emphasizing this by providing him with both weapons and special abilities that optimize getting the drop on his foes. Hmm... themed after a bat, a knight, and mixing close combat with dark and spooky tactics. Now where have I seen THAT before?

Masashi Shido: Kamen Rider Scissors, a Dark Rider, and the contractor of the Crab-Type Mirror Monster, Volcancer. A corrupt cop and detective, Scissors took bribes and cuts in illegal dealings, and used his Mirror Monster to liberally dispose of witnesses as he pleased. He ultimately died when his contract was destroyed and Volcancer turned on him. Despite his practices necessitating subterfuge, Scissors’ fighting style is rather extravagant, emulating that of a gladiator, with his deck providing cards that mix heavy combat with putting his enemy into an unfavorable situation to seal the deal, fitting for a backstabber.

Shuichi Kitaoka: Kamen Rider Zolga, one of the neutral and later heroic elements in the war, and the bearer of the contract for the Minotaur-Type Mirror Monster, Magnugigas, a colossal bio-mechanical behemoth. A shady lawyer with a lot of wealth, Zolga was diagnosed with fatal cancer, and desired to become immortal to continue living his lifestyle forever. While initially uncaring and selfish, he ultimately came to see the value in others, and lamented all the criminals that walked free due to his actions, hoping Ryuki would win. Cunning, intellegent, and crafty, Zolga’s fighting style favors both heavy defense and massive firepower, burying an enemy in a storm of blasts while he hunkers down, with his deck further emphasizing this with a bevy of long-distance combat cards and barriers.

Miyuki Tezuka: Kamen Rider Raia, a fortune-teller beyond compare, he enters the war to save lives and honor his deceased friend, and bears the contract of the Stingray-Type Mirror Monster, Evildiver. Raia’s fighting style places heavy importance on movement, offering cards that can offer him superior movement, and uses a whip as his principle weapon.

Jun Shibaura: Kamen Rider Gai, an utterly selfish and monstrous beast of a man, he wields the contract of the Rhino-Type Mirror Monster, Metalgelas. A prodigy of computers and gaming, Gai sees the death match that is the Rider War as nothing more than a game, and the fighters as players he can wipe out at his leisure. Gai’s fighting style is a straight up rush of overwhelming force, with his cards emphasizing interfering with his opponent’s options to force them to fight him directly and his brutal power of himself and his Contract Monster gives him an edge.

Takeshi Asakura: Kamen Rider Ouja, and the main Dark Rider of the series, holder of the contract for the Snake-Type Mirror Monster, Venosnaker. A sadistic monster to his core, Takeshi killed his own family as a child, and left a bloody trail in his wake for years, remorselessly cutting down anyone who falls in his path in his bloodlust. Despite his seemingly simple minded nature, Ouja is immensely cunning, favoring a sadistic fighting style that emphasizes causing as much pain to his enemy as he can before they die at his hands, and he is far from afraid to get his hands dirty. Ironically, Ouja has one of the weaker decks in the war, bearing limited options to fight with, Ouja thrives due to his sheer brutality, fighting ability, and utter ruthlessness. “Fun” fact, unlike the other Riders, Takeshi never realized that a wish was up for grabs, he was just having a good time! When he finally learned that the winner got a wish, he decided his wish would be to have ANOTHER Rider War, so he could kill another pack of warriors! Ouja’s deck does have two solid advantages over the other riders; Ouja possesses extra Contract Cards, meaning he can add other Mirror Monsters and their powers to his deck, ultimately deciding to save them to take the Mirror Monsters of the Riders he kills, with his other big trick his Unite Card, which allowed him to COMBINE his Mirror Monsters into the horrifying Chimera-Type Mirror Monster, Genocider (ain’t that a name).

Odin: Kamen Rider Odin, a Rider not designated Dark only due to the fact he doesn’t have enough of a mind to be one, and wielder of the Phoenix-Type Mirror Monster as his Contract, Goldphoenix. Odin is unusual, in that he is essentially a puppet, a brainwashed shell that acts as Shiro’s representative in the war that occupies whatever body Shiro gives the Contract to. Out of all the Riders, Odin has the greatest immediate strength, allowing him to overwhelm just about anything in ideal situations, and if things go wrong, Odin (along with Shiro) can REWIND TIME to reset the war until Shiro gets the outcome he wants, only giving up when he accepts that he won’t be able to bring his sister back.

Satoru Tojo: Kamen Rider Tiger, a man who wants to be a hero, and wields the power of the Tiger-Type Mirror Monster, Destwilder. Tiger is a broken individual, lacking a LOT of basic understanding in regards to people, he wavers between good and evil in his desire to be a hero due to his incomprehension of what it means to be heroic, ultimately becoming a hero when he selflessly sacrificed his life to save a father and son about to be hit by an oncoming truck, finally realizing what it truly meant to be a human in his last moments. A highly inexperienced fighter, Tiger often lost, which didn’t help his instability, forcing himself to rely on ambushes to win, his deck favored close-range melee and offered him support in the form of ice attacks.

Mitsuru Sano: Kamen Rider Imperer, a self-styled mercenary rider, and wielder of the multi-type contract allowing him to command the power of the Gazelle-Type Mirror Monsters, with Gigazelle serving as the leader of his horde. Imperer was raised to believe that wealth was what was most important in life, completely missing the fact that his idea to be a mercenary in the Rider War was impossible as all but one of the contestants must die for it to complete and you cannot quit either. After falling in love, Mitsuru seemed to be realizing that there is more to life than money, he tragically died before he could act on his new views, trapped in the Mirror World, reaching out to the image of his love, screaming in fear. Imperer’s fighting style makes use of boxing, and bum-rushing his enemies with his massive swarm of Contract Monsters.

And, because I am starting to grow tired and this is REALLY LONG, I am gonna finish this later today before I burn out.

[rune-writes]

Unbreakable Bond

Fandom: Persona 5

Ann Takamaki Week 2020 » Day 5: Birthday

Word Count: 4704

Rating: G

Summary: Six months after Shiho's accident, Ann still could not forget the sight of her friend’s crippled form on the ground. All she wanted was for Shiho to be healthy again so they could have fun like they used to. On Ann's 17th birthday, Ren prepared a surprise for her.

Note: A belated happy birthday to Ann!!

Read on AO3.

~*~*~*~*~

Ann was reading a fashion magazine on her bed when her phone vibrated, beeping once. She reached for it, patting her bed and the sides of her pillow. Where was it? Her phone was nowhere to be found, so she looked up, and saw light shining from the top of the stackable cube shelves next to her bed. She grabbed her phone and checked the notification. One message. From Ren. The smile came unbidden as Ann unlocked her phone and clicked the message.

‘Happy birthday!’ it said, followed by party-face emojis and birthday stickers. The time stamp beside it read 12:02 AM. Her grin only grew as she struggled to keep her composure, rolling over to her back and holding her phone over her head.  

‘Why aren’t you asleep?’ she asked. 

‘Why aren’t you?’ 

Ann snorted a quiet laughter. Would it kill Ren to be honest sometimes and say he wanted to be the first to wish her a happy birthday? Not that she would admit she’d been waiting for his message either. 

‘What are you doing?’ he asked then.

Ann grinned. ‘Texting you.’

‘On your bed?’

‘Yep.’

There was a momentary pause before he said, ‘Do you have plans after school? Wanna go somewhere?’

There it was—the question she’d been waiting for. Ann had kept her afternoon open for this very reason. Her grin threatened to swallow her face whole as she typed, ‘Are you asking me on a date, Ren?’

Another pause. ‘Maybe.’ 

Cheeky. Ann laughed under her breath. ‘Alright.’

***

Ren’s invitation was the only thing occupying her mind the entire morning. She wondered where they would go. Sharing a parfait at a cute cafe would be nice. Or maybe they’d go to the movies? They could eat a fluffy cake at a pastry shop. What if, at the end of their date, Ren surprised her with a present? Not something huge, but something unexpected. And then he’d walk her home, his hand holding hers, and once they reached her porch, his eyes would bore into hers in that way that made her stomach twist and knot before he’d lean into the gentlest kiss he had ever given her. The thought already made her heart race and cheeks burn.

Her phone vibrated again inside her bag while she queued in front of the subway escalator. She had put it on silent after the incessant beeping on the train ride to school. Her friends had flooded their group chat with birthday wishes and promises to hang out. A birthday party at Leblanc after school, Ryuji had said. But Ann already had plans, and when she’d said so, Ryuji and Futaba had bombarded her with questions: what plans? With whom?

Ren was conveniently not on. Ann wondered if he was doing it on purpose. It wouldn’t be a stretch to think he was waiting for her somewhere at the station, smirking to himself as he watched their group chat notifications come in. 

When her phone vibrated again, Ann exhaled a quiet sigh and fished her phone from inside her bag. If Ryuji still spouted nonsense about how no one in their right mind would date a girl like Ann, she would give him a piece of her mind once she cornered him at school. However, it wasn’t Ryuji’s name that greeted her eyes. Ann’s eyes widened when she beheld the name displayed across her phone.

‘Happy birthday, Ann!’ Shiho said in her message. ‘Wish you all the best. Sorry we can’t celebrate together like we used to, but I’m sure Ren-kun has prepared something amazing for you. I’m still doing well on my rehab. The doctor said I’ve improved a lot. Not enough to do any sports yet, but I hope we’ll get to see each other soon.’

Her fingers twitched, and she clutched her phone tight. Shiho always wished her a happy birthday before school. Then Ann would find a cute little present hiding in her shoe locker or desk drawer. Shiho would throw her arms around her from behind with a beam spreading from ear to ear as she asked her where Ann wanted to go or what she wanted to eat. A part of her expected that to happen now, grinning with glee as she read the message, before she remembered that Shiho was no longer at her school.

‘Thanks, Shiho,’ she typed her reply, then her fingers wavered over the keys, her lips quirking up in quiet delight. If Shiho’s health had improved, the time they’d be able to hang out might be closer than she thought. She’d set to type something, anything—that’s amazing news, Shiho—when the image of Shiho’s crippled body on the ground flashed across her mind. 

It’s your fault.

She froze in her tracks, her hands on her phone becoming still.

“Hey.” The sudden hand on her shoulder made her jump. A figure stood beside her—a figure in her school uniform. Sunlight reflected off a pair of glasses as Ren peered into her eyes. But then his smile faltered at her lack of response. “You okay?”

“Huh?”

“You kind of spaced out.”

Ann blinked—once, twice. “Sorry, I was—” The rush of traffic on the other side of the sidewalk startled her. She looked back behind her shoulder and found the subway exit standing some thirty feet away. She glanced at her phone, then quickly typed her reply. She’d already sent it and stashed the phone back inside her bag before Ren could take a peek at it.

“Were you waiting for me?” Ann asked instead, adjusting her bag straps around her shoulder.

Ren’s gaze was searching, but when Ann said nothing, he didn’t press the subject. He nodded down the pavement toward their school. “Let’s go,” he said, his lips breaking into a small smile.

***

“It’s from Shiho,” Ann said later that day. On lunch break, she sat on her desk, leaning against the window while she ate the melonpan she’d bought at the cafeteria. The sweetness exploded in her mouth. Ren’s dark gray eyes flitted upward, meeting hers for only a moment. “The text message I received this morning. She wished me a happy birthday.”

“That’s nice.” Ren responded with a nod, taking a bit bite of his tuna-flavored rice ball.

Ann waited for more, but no other answer came. “That’s it?” she asked.

“What else?”

She didn’t know. Some kind of surprised reaction, maybe? Or asked how Shiho was doing?

“She’s your best friend,” Ren went on. “You try not to show it, but I know how much you miss her.” 

Ann pursed her lips into a thin line. She averted her gaze to her bread now held on her lap.

“How is she, though?” he added.

“Good, it seems, at least from her texts.” Amazing, in fact. Now she just needed to wait until the doctors let Shiho travel. Or, wait, she had a better idea. Ann turned around in her seat and fully faced Ren. “Do you think we should go see her?”

“What?”

“She’s been pestering me to visit, saying there’s a confectionery store with all manner of sweets near her school. She said they’re really good.” 

Ren chuckled. “Do you wanna meet her or do you wanna eat some sweets?” he said. Ann responded with one of her own, leaning back against the window.

“Do you remember when I told you about Shiho?” she asked. 

Her voice was quiet under the cacophony of her classmates’ gossips and talks. She hoped her voice reached no one but Ren. From the corner of her eyes, she could see she had his full attention. 

“We only met in middle school, but it always felt like I knew her my entire life. She was this weird girl, quiet. While everyone avoided me, she just... randomly struck a conversation with me, saying my painting sucked.” The memory prompted a wry grin spreading across her face. “My parents were always away, so my house was always empty. When Shiho learned about this, she started taking me to all sorts of places. Pastry shops. Bakeries. These cute accessory stores or just shopping for clothes. Sometimes, I go with her to visit some sports stores or help her practice before big games. I never missed her games...”

Ann trailed off. It seemed like it was just yesterday when they were perusing the stores in Shibuya’s underground mall. Shiho had never tasted the buffet’s chocolate fountain either. When Ann went to visit her, maybe she could bring Shiho a crepe from that stand in Central Street Shiho loved so much. The small pang in her heart returned, clenching a little tighter. 

After school, Ann refrained herself from pestering Ren to tell her where they were going. It was going to be a surprise, and she was content to let it stay that way. They rode the train to Shibuya and hopped off at the station. She half-expected Ren to lead her out and into Central Street, but they headed for the Keio Inokashira Line, where they boarded another train heading for Inokashira Park.

“We’re going to Inokashira Park?” Ann asked once they boarded the train and found an empty spot between a man in a suit and a woman carrying groceries.

“Yep,” he replied, but didn’t elaborate.

That was unexpected, though Ann wouldn’t say she minded going there. It had been a while, and strolling through the vast park under beautiful autumn leaves might be a great way to spend her birthday. 

The ride took 20 minutes, give or take. They descended from the train, then exited the station to a quiet residential area. The park lay only a short walk away. Over a stone bridge crossing the river, trees with gold and brown leaves lined the path on both sides. Ann breathed in the crisp afternoon air, cool against her lungs. She always loved it here. 

“So,” Ann said, turning around on her side and peering into his eyes. “What’s the plan?”

“Want me to tell you, or would you prefer it be a surprise?” He’d kept walking with hands in his pockets, his lips curving into the beginning of a smile.

Ann grinned. “Surprise me.”

Ren grinned back.

The first agenda of the day was a swan boat—one of the top tourist attractions of the park. Ren had apparently accompanied Yusuke on a ride once, where several people had thought them a couple. He had wanted to ride it with Ann after that. But when the rental place came into view, standing in the distance over the bank of the large pond, Ann ground her feet to a halt. Legend had it that the Goddess Benzaiten would curse any couple who rode the swan boat together. They would break up shortly thereafter. 

“You really want to ride the boat?” Ann asked.

Noticing she had stayed back, Ren paused on his steps, tilting his head in genuine inquiry. “Why?” he asked. Ann refused to say why, partly because it was a ludicrous legend, partly because she feared the legend might come true. Understanding dawned on his face when she said nothing, and Ren pulled his lips into a teasing grin. “What, you’re afraid of some superstition?”

There were valid reasons one should be afraid of it. What if something bad truly happened to them and they broke up? 

“If something bad truly happens and we break up,” Ren went on, “you can just blame the curse and forget all about me.”

Ann scoffed, feeling his reply was ridiculous enough to lighten her mood. “I could never forget you,” she said. Her answer brought a smile to his face, and Ren reached out to take her hand.

“That’s why I’m saying we should get on the boat and prove the legend wrong. Besides, would you really let some curse get between us?”

The answer was obvious as Ann felt her lips pulled into a quiet grin. He tugged her hand, then led her to the boat rental place.

It was her first time riding the boat too. It seemed fun, but she never had the chance to ride it. “Next time” had been her reason. If she thought about it now, there were no particular reasons behind it. Why? She could’ve ridden on it with Shiho if she wanted. Had Ann ingrained the curse so deep in her mind that she became incapacitated because of it? Because even without the bad luck, her life had already been a hell of its own. 

People had shunned her. Some had even bullied her. She’d tried not to let it get to her, but for a twelve- or thirteen-year-old, peer pressure had been enough to corner her and make her think of the worst. Should I dye my hair black and wear contact lenses? If I look like everyone else, people may start to like me. These thoughts had spiraled down in her mind with no signs of stopping. She was always alone; her parents were never home. She had no one to depend on—until Shiho, but even that light only lasted three years before she was taken away from her. 

Paddling the swan boat was harder than it looked. And with a difference in strength, it was hard to coordinate their movements. Ann would think their time in the metaverse had strengthened her muscles, but that did not seem like the case. 

“You don’t look like it, but you’re pretty strong, aren’t you?” Ann said, huffing and puffing her breath. 

Ren wasn’t entirely active in gym class either. He wasn’t the strongest nor the fastest. When the boys played soccer or basketball, he would always sit back. “I hate breaking a sweat,” he’d said once. Yet every time they were in the metaverse, he always looked like he was ready to show off. 

Ren chuckled under his breath. “I’ve been going to the gym. Morgana nagged me to strengthen my muscles.”

Figures. The cat was behind everything. She should follow his example and visit the gym more often. 

Wait—

“Where is Morgana?” Ann hadn’t seen him since morning. 

Ren’s smile was wry. “When I told him I’ll be going on a date with you, he turned around and flicked his tail at me.”

“Poor guy. You should buy him something. What about sushi?”

“I should buy you something.”

Ann clicked her tongue in irritation then stared him down, her eyes hard. “You never gave him those tuna sushi, right?” He never did, from all the way back in August—Ann knew. Ren quickly relented, averting his gaze and finding some interesting spot to observe on the water. “It won’t be the high-end sushi bar like in Ginza, but I’m sure there are some delicious ones around here.”

“Then,” he said, “we’re having sushi for dinner.”

***

Massive trees lined the pond on either side. In the spring, pink and white sakura petals decorated the trees in its transient beauty. Ann often sat on the benches, under the awning of the low-hanging branches and overlooking the pond. She imagined that rowing a boat in the middle of it would feel like traversing through a forest. The thick foliage obscured the view of passers-by and park-goers, making it seem like she was in a dreamscape or fantasy, where there was only herself and nature. 

That was what Ann felt now that she was sitting on a boat in the middle of the pond. But instead of sakura, the trees were now lined with gold and red and yellow with a dash of green here and there. They had stopped paddling, resting their legs. They’d gone quite far, their boat rocking between the gentle waves. Late sunlight dappled across the water surface. When a cool, crisp wind that brushed past her skin like a soft caress against her face, Ann watched the water rippling along with it. By the bank, leaves danced in the wind, swirling and dipping and soaring high until they flew out of sight. 

“Having fun?” Ren asked. Ann nodded, drawing a quiet, contented breath. She felt his smile more than she saw it, before he shifted his gaze away and said, “I heard you’ve been wanting to ride the boat.”

That caught her attention. She turned to him.

“Who did you hear it from?”

“Shiho.” The answer rolled easily off his tongue, as though it was apparent. If Ren were any other person, Ann would have thought he might have heard it in passing or from Shiho herself. But he barely knew Shiho—barely talked to her before the incident in April—so how could he have known? He didn’t give her a chance to ask before he glanced behind his shoulder and said, “The sun almost set.”

The far eastern sky had grown a deep blazing orange while the sun made its slow descent behind them, sending out the last of its rays before dipping under the horizon. Ann swallowed her question as she moved to paddle alongside Ren to turn the boat around. They’d gotten the hang of it, finding the perfect rhythm between his paddling and hers. They reached the rental space by the time the sun completely disappeared. 

Hand in hand, they headed for the gate leading toward Kichijoji. Various kinds of stores stood on both sides. From second-hand boutiques to chic cafes, furniture stores and handmade accessory stores. Ren’s focus had been on his phone for a while, typing one-handed as text message after text message came with each vibration and incoming beep. 

“Who’re you talking with?” Ann asked.

“Hm? Oh, Sojiro.” The slight pause had tugged her curiosity, but when he met her inquiring gaze, Ren only said, “He’s making sure I don’t go home too late.”

That was nice, Ann thought, to have someone to worry about when he would get home. She didn’t have anyone like that.

Ren messed with his phone for a while longer. When Ann peeked, she noticed the map open on his screen. ‘Sushi bar’ was the search item and several red dots had appeared. Ren clicked and unclicked each dot, reading the descriptions and the reviews left on it, until he finally decided on a place and led her to it. 

His phone beeped again. Another incoming message. Ann glanced at him right as Ren sent his reply. 

“Boss again?”

Sojiro didn’t seem like the type to worry so much. Hadn’t he let Ren out on nights? Ren’s ambiguous nod only fed her suspicion that he was hiding something. She opened her mouth then, about to say something, when they rounded a corner and a voice she hadn’t expected to hear reach her ear. 

“Ann.”

Ann froze. 

Soft and meek, it was a voice she hadn’t heard in person for months. The last time Ann heard it was when they brought her to the school rooftop before she moved away. Ann slowly turned around in search of the source, and there, some twenty feet ahead, was a person she hadn’t expected to see. Dressed in a navy-blue jacket and white cropped trousers, her black hair tied in its usual ponytail, Shiho’s features lit up by the smile blossoming across her face. She held her hand high above her head, waving at her excitedly.

“Aren’t you going to say hi?” Ren asked when Ann failed to react.

He was beaming, giving her hand a gentle squeeze. Did he know? Did he plan this? Nonsense. Didn’t he know how far Shiho’s home now was? How had she even gotten to this place? On a school day, no less. Then there was her message that morning. Sorry we can’t celebrate together like we used to. Shiho wouldn’t have said that if she’d planned to come. She wasn’t the type to surprise Ann like this. But—

I’m sure Ren-kun has prepared something amazing for you.

Ann slowly shifted her attention to her still-beaming boyfriend, who was nodding his head toward Shiho as if trying to say, go on. Go to her. 

“Did you plan this?” Her voice was only above a whisper. 

He replied with a shrug and a knowing smile. Maybe he thought this was what she wanted, and maybe it was—she’d said so herself; she wanted to meet Shiho. But as Ann loosened her hold on Ren’s hand and all she wanted was to cross the distance and hug Shiho with all her might—because Shiho was here! She’d travelled all the way here!—Ann found herself hitting Ren’s arm instead. Again and again and again—hitting him with a fist as, one by one, tears rolled down her cheeks. 

Why did he bring Shiho here? Didn’t Ren know her friend was still in recovery? Didn’t he know she was still going to rehab every week? Ann knew, because Ann had been in touch with Shiho every other day. They’d texted each other and called each other. Ann knew everything that was going on in Shiho’s life as though she lived it herself. And Ann knew that every day was still a struggle, even though Shiho had said she could almost do everything by herself now. But almost was still not one hundred percent everything. Her physician praised her for improving so much in so little time, but they’d told her to not push her limit. And travelling was clearly pushing the limit. 

What if something bad happened to Shiho on the way? What if Shiho could never return to how she once was?

Arms wrapped around her. Shiho rested her cheek on Ann’s shoulder, warm tears seeping into her school blazer.

“I’m alright, Ann,” Shiho whispered to her ear, over and over like a mantra. “I’m safe.”

***

“I’ll leave you two to catch up,” Ren said before he disappeared from the bar. Ann watched him leave from their seat by the corner. They’d ordered several sushi sets, Ren promising to pay for everything. From his part-time jobs, he’d explained to Shiho. Though there was probably some truth to his words, Ann knew most of it came from their Palace pilfering. 

Silence descended, broken only when Shiho said, “Don’t blame him too much, Ann.”

Ann glanced at her friend before shifting her gaze to her hands. “I’m happy you’re here with me now, Shiho, but…” She shook her head. “Once we return, I’m going to give him a piece of my mind. How could he have thought of bringing you all the way back to Tokyo?” If their sushi had arrived, Ann imagined she would have taken out her irritation on them. It’s not that she disliked Shiho’s presence. Just that…

“I wanted to.” Shiho’s quiet reply drew Ann’s attention to her. “I want to celebrate your birthday with you. And more than anything, I wanted to show you how well I’ve gotten.” Her lips quirked into a small smile, brightening her features. “And it’s not like I went alone. Mom’s here somewhere.”

“Your mom?”

Shiho gave a self-deprecating chuckle. “I got an earful, though.”

“Serves you right! If you wanted us to meet, I could’ve gone to your place instead. In fact, we were just talking about that this afternoon.” 

“But that wouldn’t have been a surprise.”

A muscle twitched along Ann’s jaw as Shiho let out another light laugh. Ann clenched both of her hands on the table, gritting her teeth at her friend’s nonchalant attitude.

“Don’t overestimate your body, Shiho, please. Didn’t the doctor say you shouldn’t push yourself? You’re not your one hundred percent yet. What if something irreversibly bad happens? Yes, it’s great to hear your health has gotten better and I can’t wait to hang out with you again, but—”

Shiho’s crippled form flashed across her mind. Her throat closed up; tears sprang in her eyes as Ann furiously blinked them away. When she spoke next, she couldn’t hide the tremble in her voice: 

“I don’t want anything bad to happen to you.” If Shiho’s rush to return to her full potential backfired, Ann didn’t know if she could forgive herself.

The server brought their sushi with three glasses of cold green tea. Ann averted her gaze, brushing at a stray tear as she took out her phone and mumbled something about telling Ren the food had arrived. However, before she could, Shiho’s hand encompassed hers. 

“Do you still blame yourself?” her friend asked.

Ann went still. “I don’t,” she said, even as her heart clenched tight and her breath caught in her throat. 

“It’s not your fault, Ann.”

She knew that. She thought she did. That was why Carmen woke up from inside her. But then there were moments when she lay in the dark, when thoughts she never knew she ever had kept her awake the entire night.

Your fault. Your fault. Your fault. You should’ve noticed the signs. You should’ve known she was suffering. Even if there had been nothing you could’ve done, you should’ve been there for her at the least. You’re her friend! Why had you let her feel so alone, so cornered, that the only consolation she could find was on the other side of the rooftop ledge?

Shiho pulled her into her arms, whispering soothing words to her ear. “It’s alright. It’s okay. I’m fine. It’s not your fault, Ann. It never was.”

The dam broke. Ann clutched onto Shiho’s back as tears she never realized she had held streamed down her face. 

***

Maybe it was an excuse—checking up on Shiho, or going to the sweets store near her school. All Ann ever wanted was to see her friend healthy again so they could have fun like they used to.

When Ren returned to his seat, Ann ended up giving him a piece of her mind. A little more nagging and scolding and refusing to speak with him for the rest of the day. Shiho joked that it must have been Benzaiten’s curse, at which Ren laughed and Ann frowned. 

“We’re not breaking up,” Ann said with certainty. 

Shiho and Ren looked at her in surprise, after which Shiho said to Ren, “You heard her, Ren-kun.” They snickered at Ann’s expanse. 

Shiho’s mother had gone to Kichijoji’s shopping arcade before she went to pick her daughter up at the sushi bar. Ann drew an internal sigh of relief when she saw no signs of vexations on her face as she greeted Ann with a smile. When the girls introduced Ren, however, there was a frozen stillness to her features that even made the unflappable Ren break out in sweats.

They waved her goodbye, but before they turned around the corner to wherever her mother parked her car, Shiho turned around once and shouted, “Come over sometimes, okay?” Shiho beamed, waving her hand high, then disappeared from view. 

“You heard her,” Ren said. She did.

Ren offered his hand, but Ann only spared it a glance before turning her back on him and heading down the opposite direction from Shiho. Ren fell into step beside her. 

“I’ll walk you home,” he said.

“No need.”

“Even so.”

Night had fallen. Lights flickered along the storefronts and windows. Conversations floated around as they walked in silence between passers-by in the shopping district. 

As they turned the corner and headed back toward the park, Ann murmured, “Thanks.” 

She’d acted strong—acted like she had accepted everything. That was never the case. A part of her—an insecure part of her—always came in the middle of the night to whisper despicable things about herself. Fake. Impostor. She only joined the Phantom Thieves because she felt guilty about Shiho. She’d sought to change the hearts of vile adults so no one would have to suffer like her again. It was true, but that was only half of the truth. In all honesty, Ann wanted to seek forgiveness. A redemption. If she accomplished many good deeds, maybe the Gods would hear her prayer and give Shiho her health back. 

As the park came into view, Ann felt Ren’s gaze on her. She still refused to meet it, but let her face break into a tiny crack of a smile. The twinge of pain in her heart gradually subsided, leaving her feeling liberated, as though a heavy weight had been lifted off her mind.

~ END ~

[write-like-you-mean-it]

A Hunter’s Prey: A Young Boy’s Trauma

Killua arrived in 4 weeks. The countdown of Killua’s return made learning Nen even more difficult and taxing than previous attempts. Rather than learning at my own pace, I had to speed through training that might take years to complete. The closest I ever got to this level of training was when I trained with Illumi. However, Gon’s training was relentless. We would always awake at the crack of dawn, followed by a small run around the forest, and lastly Nen training until I collapsed from exhaustion. 

My only solace has been the heartache of missing Illumi finally dulled to a painful throb only felt when I had failed once again to hold Nen in my body for the full time. The two hour mark became a pain in my ass. I’d barely been able to break over 30 minutes within the past week that we’d been training. 

“C-can we take a small break?” I asked after collapsing for the third time of the day. Gon had taken a seat on a moss covered rock that overlooked the sea and myself. He wasn’t paying attention to me. Even his childlike mind had too much stuffed into the time he’d been alive. I sighed while taking a seat next to him. “Gon?” I questioned in hopes of gaining his attention. 

The boy finally turned to look at me with the plastered smile on his face. This time it didn’t reach his eyes. “Oh, yeah a break is fine.” With his untampered arm, he handed me my water bottle. 

We looked out at the crashing waves far from the shore. A small tension filled the air as I wondered if I should ask him about what took up so much space in his mind. My hands absentmindedly played with blades of grass as the ocean breeze fluttered through my hair. 

“Gon, what might be on your mind. You seem distracted today.”

His eyes never left a far off point in the sea. They were like a wandering traveler who was only here as a stop and knew the better and bigger world that awaited him beyond the shore; yet, he couldn’t go. “Yeah, I’m alright. Watching you use Nen makes me miss my own power.”

“What type of Nen did you have?”

“I am an enhancer. I use a rock, paper, scissors thing called Jajanken. It is so cool. I can demonstrate it for you,” said the boy with excitement returning to his demeanor. He stood up on top of the rock before he realized what he was doing. The physical manifestation of realization followed by sadness took over his small frame. “Or I could if I did have Nen. I am lucky though. I’m still alive.”

“What happened to make you lose your Nen?” I asked. Gon stepped off of the rock and sat back down onto it. 

“I’ll tell you once you get to an hour,” he said before pulling out the timer once again. “You’re at 45 minutes. You’ve had a break for long enough.” His tone had sharpened like a knife. The awkward tension returned and fluttered with the ocean air. 

I stood up and returned to my state of Ren. “I’m sorry,” was all I could say. 

--------

Soon it was only 3 weeks until Killua’s return. I hadn’t made much more progress. Every single day felt like my body was splitting into two separate pieces. What was even worse was that Gon was refusing to help me as much as before. I don’t know what I said that ticked him off so much. 

At this point in training, I’d been able to hold my Nen for 55 minutes. Too short for any explanation and long enough that I didn’t have as much time in the day. With sleeping, I had at most 7 hours to practice. 

The morning runs became more difficult as Gon didn’t let me catch up to him anymore. He began sprinting through the forest; however, I did not have his experience. Unlike him, I did not grow up in the forest. I was stuck following in his footsteps rather than matching pace. Once arriving at the same mountaintop, we’d practice Nen. 

Today, I was determined to hit that dreaded 1 hour mark. I had to or I would never get close to meeting the goal set by Gon. For hours, Gon would sit on the rock overlooking the ocean and watch the timer. He did nothing else for he was lost in his sea of thoughts. 

Part of him reminded me of Illumi. His quietness reminded me of Illumi and I’s first meeting. Illumi was always so quiet and lost in his own thoughts. It wasn’t until he finally opened up to me that I could actually love him. 

Illumi’s words of how no one has ever loved him before filled my heart. Because of everything that happened after we consumed our love, I forgot to digest the words. The pain sent a sting straight to my heart. Illumi only ever wanted love and I was the first person to give it to him. 

My mind wandered to him sitting on that boat in the middle of the ocean. Was he alright? Was he still alive? How is Machi and Chrollo doing? During these weeks, I started to get nightmares about the events that had happened. Machi and Chrollo blame me for not being stronger. If only I had a way to control my power then Hisoka wouldn't have… No. I can’t blame myself for actions that happened in the past. 

“One hour,” remarked Gon. 

“Huh?” I questioned while dropping Ren. 

“You’ve made it to a full hour. I’m a little surprised.”

“Oh. It’s already been an hour?” I looked out over the sea to see the sun had dramatically lowered in the sky. “I hadn’t noticed.” I took my seat next to Gon.

“I could tell.”

He, once again, handed me my water bottle as I took a full sip. I, also, hadn’t realized how thirsty I had become. While finishing the full bottle I remembered our conversation from a week ago. Would he want to discuss his past with me? Should I bring it up? I decided to try with a small “so…”

“I lost my Nen when I almost died. Alluka saved me from myself. If Killua hadn’t been there for me then I would’ve lost everything.” His words fell from his lips as if he was an adult recounting a time in his childhood. Gon continued, “A close friend of mine died because I wasn’t strong enough. His name was Kite. When he died, it was the second time he’d saved me. I owe Kite and Killua everything.”

“Kite? I’ve heard that name before,” I said while thinking back in my memory. “I think he was a contracted support for my work many years ago. I don’t remember much of him because I didn’t see him after the initial meeting. He’s a stoic quiet guy. My old boss never said anything bad about him. I’m sorry he lost his life.”

“Yeah, Kite was a good man.”

“You have a lot of good people in your life, Gon.”

Gon finally turned to look at me. He sniffed a bit while wiping his eyes with the unbroken hand. “You’re right.” I instinctively, wrap my arms tightly around this crying child. I hold him as he sobs deep, emotional trauma. From the cries, I could tell these were all emotions that had yet to be processed in his mind or he was still going through them. 

“It’s okay,” I say, still holding him in my tired frame. “Everything will be alright.” 

“Killua has always been there for me and when he needed me the most, I was too busy with my own thoughts. I hurt him so much and I-I don’t know how to..” His voice cut off back into another sob. 

I held this crying child until his sobs turned into the shaky hiccups after a long cry. “Gon, explain what happened.”

“I went after Kite’s killer. She was so powerful that I had to use all the Nen left for the rest of my life. I told Killua that this fight wasn’t with him and that he should leave. So he did. I-I did mean to. I was just hurt and in so much pain and Killua wouldn’t understand. He couldn’t-”

“Gon, it’s okay. Killua saved you. He still cares about you. He’ll return. That’s all that matters. Truly, I’m more upset with the fact they allowed you on such a dangerous mission that could’ve gotten you killed.”

“It’s alright. I wanted to go. I had to save Kite but I should’ve brought Killua along. He is my best friend and I don’t know what I’d do without him.”

A smile crossed my face as Gon wiped away a few tears. The sun had fully set at this point. Darkness crept up on us. “Would you like some dinner from Aunt Mito? I don’t know about you but I’m starving.”

“Sure, Gon,” I smiled but after that day, I didn’t look at him like a child again. 

--------

Only two more weeks until Killua would arrive. Time was running shorter and shorter. Everything felt like a ticking time bomb. Frustration grew as I couldn’t seem to grasp holding onto my Nen for more than an hour and 15 minutes. I only had such a short time. 

After Gon’s confession, he finally was able to open up to me more. He told me about everything that happened with York New and about his friends Leorio and Kurapika. He told me about his adventures at the Hunter exam. He told me about Greed Island and the hunt for his dad.  Lastly, he told me about meeting his dad. 

The more stories he told me, the easier it was to hold my Nen. Within the past year, Gon held such an interesting life. Part of me wished that he’d tell me about what happened with Kite but I knew better than asking. Instead, I learned more about Gon than any other child. 

It was nice to sit and listen to someone else talk. Illumi was never a talker. 

“So when’s the wedding?” asked Gon. His question caught me off guard but I was still able to focus on the true task at hand. 

“We haven’t picked a date or anything. Truly he asked me less than a month ago. I don’t know when we’ll get a chance. Most likely it’ll be at some place expensive as he is a Zoldyck.”

“Do you know that means you’ll be related to Killua?” asked Gon while jumping up and down. 

I laugh and reply, “I’ll also be related to Milluki and Kalluto.”

“Wait, you've met Killua’s other siblings?”

“Yes, I have lived at the Zoldyck manor for a quarter of a year. We had a family dinner once which was a shitshow.”

“How’s Killua’s dad and mom. He rarely talks about them beyond what his father forced him to do as a kid.”

“Oh well his father is domineering and a presence. His mother is a nutcase. She’s a little crazy but so is his brother. Killua’s grandfather is cool though. He helped me with my Nen just like you. With Illumi’s family, it’s no wonder how he ended up the way he was.”

“Are you excited to be a part of the family?”

I’m not sure. They might actually kick us out of the house as Illumi isn’t the one to inherit the Zoldyck name. We haven’t really talked about it.”

“Illumi should inherit it. Killua hates his family. Illumi would be a much better head of the house than Killua anyway. He doesn’t want to become anything like his father.”

“Neither does Illumi. He only wants to be praised and loved.”

Gon looked at me a little strangely. “Same with Killua. Maybe you’ll be able to convince them to finally talk.”

“Yeah, maybe.” I chuckle while thinking how that conversation may go. Finally I released my Nen and felt the same exhaustion as before.”

“One hour and 16 minutes,” said Gon.

“Shit. 

-----

One more week. One more week and I only felt weaker than before. At the week deadline, I climbed out of bed only for my stomach to churn and force me into the bathroom. The hotel room had become a new home for me. Throwing up last night’s meal given to me by Mito was disappointing. Mito was almost as delicious of a cook as she was kind hearted. Gon had been inviting me back to his house after training because I’d been here so long.

I knew I’d not felt well the day before but I chalked it up to finally getting within the 1:45 mark on time. Instead, I knew this was a whole new feeling. I hadn’t felt this sick in ages. My head ached and I’d become tired so quickly. 

Standing over the porcelain bowl gave me a clarity that I had yet to have in the month since Illumi had vanished from my grasp. I muttered a quiet “shit” before emptying everything in my stomach once again. 

I decided to cancel training for the first time ever. Even over the phone, I could hear Gon’s sadness. He asked if he could bring soup over later. I obliged his request. 

Instead of staying in bed and trying to sleep it off, I decided to take a quick trip to the drug store. If my suspicions were right, I’d have a new problem on my hands. 

My hands grazed over the test that lay on the bathroom counter. I’d only taken it a few minutes ago but my hands were already shaking. I closed my eyes and held up the plastic test so that it was in eyeshot when I opened my eyes. 

As expected, the words “pregnant” lit up the screen. “Shit. Illumi got his wish.” I chucked the test across the room before lying back onto the bed with a million questions in my head. All of them falling to one answer, we never used protection. 

[shadow-assassin-blix]

It’s A Gray Area

CHAPTER 8

Finished the last episode 9 finally and moving on to more fun stuff. Um. Slight near death experience. Some Smut. Not very detailed but tis there. Some fluff. Secrets revealed. I am still yeeting canon out the door because I can. 

Everything tag: @mikeisthricedeceased​ 

When they finally returned to Ajon Kloss, she told Poe, “Make sure no one makes our newbie uncomfortable until I return?” As she ran out of the Falcon.

Blix ran toward the med-bay, where Leia was resting on one of the beds, while Ben sat next to her.

“Hi! Okay. Let’s… let’s check things out,” She said trying to catch her breath.

She moved quickly over to Leia and began running scans. Minutes later she was looking over the results and was cautiously happy with what she saw.

“Okay. Okay. Well. Good news, your brain is brightly colored again, and I see no dying areas here,” She reported as she presented them.

“And the bad news?” Ben asked warily.

“Not bad news per se. I don’t know if these effects will last is the main issue. I don’t want you working at all. You are on a stress-free lifestyle indefinitely, Princess Leia. I don’t want anything to aggravate your symptoms. Let’s not… Let’s not waste Luke’s sacrifice to save his beloved sister,” She explained with a sad sigh.

Leia nodded her head understandingly, while Ben looked away clenching his jaw briefly.

“Also… may have turned a baby Sith to our side, no big deal. She’s going to help us find Palpatine and defeat him. I suspect he has some nasty surprises for us in store,” Blix explained, before turning to Ben. “What do ya say? Ready to go fight one last battle?”

Ben nodded his head, determination in his eyes.

“Alright, let’s go work out a plan. Amber, make sure our esteemed patient here, doesn’t move an inch,” She commanded giving Leia a pointed look.

Blix and Ben made their way into the command center, where everyone was discussing the best path to Exegol.

They had a solid plan within an hour, the thing was… they didn’t have the manpower. What they truly needed was the Republic to take up arms and join them, but fear ran deep.

They geared up, and every squadron was given orders to head out. Blix who had her lightsabers and was making sure Rey, Ben, and Maeve were ready, looked around trying to find Poe.

When she did, she spotted him by his X-Wing in his flight gear. She walked over to him after telling them to head to the Falcon, which was going to lead the pack.

“Hey.” She greets watching him get BB-8 ready.

He looked up and said, “Hi. What’s up babe?”

She quietly hugs him, and whispered, “Stay safe Flyboy. You’re not allowed to die remember that.”

He gave a soft chuckle as he hugged her back, “Same to you, Consular.”

She snorted slightly at the title, almost regretting telling him about the Jedi Order.

She presses a quick kiss to his lips, gives BB-8 a pat on his head and moves over to the Falcon.

Soon enough, they were on their way. It was about an hour later when they came to a field of red clouds and lightning. It was a struggle to navigate through for everyone.

When they broke through, what they saw made them all gasp. There was a fleet of Xyston-Star Destroyers before them.

“Finn, set us down and we’ll make our way to Sidious. Stay safe yeah? I still got a lot to teach you, so don’t you dare die,” She warned him as they landed.

“Yes ma’am,” He responded with a laugh.

The four of them made their way down to the platform. Once on it, they were confronted with the Knights of Ren.

“Maeve, Rey, go on ahead. Ben and I will catch up,” Blix ordered, taking her stance with both lightsabers in hand, twirling them.

Ben took out his and stood back-to-back with her. He gave a shrug that reminded her of Han, and she shook her head. The knights surrounded them, and they braced themselves.

One knight to her right, lunged for her and she parried with ease. It didn’t take the two of them very long to defeat the knights together. Once they were all down, they ran forward to catch up to the girls. When they did, they spotted Maeve lying on the ground, and Rey was on her knees trying to catch her breath.

Ben rushed forward to help, and Blix moved to join him but was stopped…. She felt something was off… with Poe.

She reached out to him… her mind racing to find him in the chaos above. When she does, she can see and hear the defeat in his voice.

‘Hey, Flyboy aren’t you always telling me to have hope? Where’s that undying flame?’ She asked him in his mind.

He bit his lip worried, and thought, ‘I don’t know what to d-‘

His thought was caught off as Lando Carlrissian’s voice came over on comms, telling him they weren’t alone.

Blix felt the arrival of hundreds of ships and she broke the line off, cheering him on.

She refocused on the situation at hand and noted that Ben was checking on Maeve, as Rey continued to fight her grandfather. Blix rushed forward as Palpatine sent a bolt of lightning toward Rey. She blocked it with her sabers, pushing it back.

The burst ended quickly and as she gave a twirl of her sabers, Palpatine noted, “Ahh. The Kenobi. Yes. You indeed look just like your grandfather. Think of the power you’d have if you joined the dark side.”

“Thanks, and like my grandfather, I don’t give a fuck. Take your proposition and shove it,” She snarled at him.

He frowned deeply at her, and growled, “Same insolence just like him too. I’ll enjoy killing you.”

He sent wave after wave of lightning bolts at her; she blocked each one as quickly as she could. He snarled before changing his tactic. He sent a bolt directly at Ben and Maeve, who had no way of defending themselves quickly enough. Blix ran forward and dove in front of them taking the bolt.

She gasped hard as the lightning surged through her and her limbs locked. Her vision went black as Rey stood up suddenly. Her mind was numb, and she felt pain just radiating throughout her body. Her eyes clenched shut and when she opened them, she was someplace different.

She was in a temple; she could see large city outside the windows. ’Coruscant?’

“Yes. This is the Jedi Temple in Coruscant. Or at least… when it still existed,” She heard her grandfather’s voice.

She sat up looking at him, confused.

“…am I dead?” She asked slightly panicked.

“No. Not yet. You got very close though,” He informed her as he helped her up.

She looked around, noticing that more and more Jedis were appearing around her.

“She did it. She summoned all of you,” She whispered amazed.

“It wasn’t just her. It was you as well. You are going to be an amazing teacher. If you continue on this course, we feel you will bring the balance back and return the Jedi Order back to its former glory,” Anakin informed her.

“Mh. Former glory? How about… a better version? Because… no offense but… there were many reasons why the Order fell way back when. But I will do my best,” She commented.

Qui-Gon chuckled softly at her, “This is why we think you will do well. You will make an excellent Consular.”

“We will be here for you, just like Rey. May the Force be with you, my dearest,” Her grandfather tells her, pressing a small kiss to her forehead.

They all slowly disappeared along with the room. Her vision was dark, and she eventually came to, looking at 3 very concerned faces hovering over her.

“…Hi. That sucked. Don’t get struck by lightning,” She groaned as she fully awakened.

She heard 3 sighs of relief, and some hands trying to help lift her up into a sitting position. Her head hurt but it was not too terrible. Her chest ached as she breathed; it felt a bit like her ribs were bruised.

“Let’s get out of this hellhole,” She requested gingerly standing up.

Ben wrapped an arm around her, keeping her steady as they walked.

Palpatine was dead. The First Order had been defeated. A ship had landed down near them and picked them up, taking them back to Ajon Kloss.

A medic droid checked over ribs, spritzing some Bacta spray onto them to help begin the healing process.

By the time they had landed, her ribs only lightly ached and she was able to walk without assistance. They looked around through the cheering crowd, trying to find Poe and Finn.

Rey spotted them first, sprinting to them. Ben spotted his mother and rushed over to her. Maeve stood nearby Blix, smiling softly at everyone. One of the other pilots, enthusiastically picked her up, cheering. She laughed at Maeve’s look of surprise.

Blix looked around and moved toward her three favorite people. Poe sees her first and pulls her into a kiss that she gladly returned.

He broke away only to hug her; Finn and Rey joining in. BB-8 beeped and chirped happily at their feet, rolling around in circles.

“We did it!” Blix cheered as they pulled away slightly.

The celebrations went well into the night, with every planet contacting them to send thanks and congrats.

The next day, while still in cheerful moods, they planned their next moves which was to get rid of the last of the Empire’s strongholds.

This process took several weeks to carry out, and while that was done with Poe and Finn in command, Blix continued her training with Rey, Ben, and Maeve. Maeve had gotten a new lightsaber, one that glowed bright orange but was “Infinitely cooler than her old one” as she said.

Her and Poe discussed what had happened within her nightmares and figured their best plan was to go see if there were any clues within her mother’s belongings back on Naboo. However, they had a hard time planning a few days to do so.

In fact, they hardly got to see each other much over the past few weeks. One day, she was working in the med-bay, training some new hires, when Poe walked in. She smiled brightly at him, but quickly scanned him with her eyes to make sure he was okay. She finished up her talk with the newbies and walked over to him.

“Hi. Are you okay?” She checked first just to be sure.

“Yeah. I’m okay honey. In fact… I hate to do this but…” Poe said in a mockingly sad tone.

She looked at him confused until he leaned down to lift her up, throwing her over his shoulder. She shook her head at the ridiculousness, ignoring the whistles and catcalls that were thrown their way as he walked. He stopped, and as she heard a small beep, he began walking again, into his room she swiftly identified.

He sets her down into a chair at his kitchen table, where she sees dinner was laid out before her. Poe lit the candles that he had placed and handed her a red rose.

She takes it with a smile, “Poe… what is all this?”

“This… is us making time for us. I haven’t seen my girl in a few weeks and it’s honestly quite upsetting,” He tells her matter-of-factly.

They eat, telling each other about their day’s and enjoying each other’s company.

“So, I hear you’ve been learning how to take care of BB-8?” Poe asked with a smile.

“Yeah. My padawans are pretty well versed and are good about training themselves. The med-bay keeps getting new nurses, droids, and I’ve even hired a few new doctors to help ease up the duties for me. So, I’ve been trying to learn skills. Bee is one of the most important things to you, so I want to make sure he is in top shape when he goes out with you,” Blix explained somewhat embarrassed.

“Thank you. He’s… he really adores you. Can’t get him to shut up about you,” Poe states even though BB-8 beeped from his charging station that Poe was just as bad.

Blix chuckled at them as they playfully argued.

“I guess it’s a good thing I love you both then,” Blix tells them, cutting them off.

Poe looked at her shocked.

“I’m sorry…. say that again?” He requested as he moved around to kneel before her.

“I love you,” She confirmed looking down at him.

He leans up, capturing her lips with his. She slowly stands up along with him, still kissing.

“Bee. Go to bed yeah?” She ordered between kisses.

She hears him beep, saying we were being gross anyway, before he powered down.

Poe slowly pulled away and after taking a deep breath, stated, “I love you. So much.”

The next few minutes was a flurry of clothes flying everywhere and stumbling blindly to the bed. When they eventually got on the bed, they stopped, breathes heavy, and stared at each other for a moment.

Blix bit her lip, mischievously, and flipped them over. She smiled at Poe’s look of surprise and enjoyed watching it morph into a look of pleasure as she took him in and began to ride him. Her control didn’t last long, as Poe sat up, thrusting in time with her movements.

They were so desperate for one another that it didn’t take long for either of them to reach their peaks. They came down from their highs, pulling away from one another slowly. When they were able to move again, they both cleaned themselves up, before returning to the bed.

She laid down on his chest with a soft sigh. She slowly fell asleep laying there; Poe laid there for a few moments… He gently slipped off his necklace, taking the ring off. He slipped it on to her ring finger on her left hand, happy that it fit nicely. He pulled it off, putting it back on the chain, before gingerly clipping it around her neck.

He fell asleep with a smile.

The next morning, Blix woke up feeling rested, and happy. She got up, stretching, snatching one of Poe’s shirts and slipping it on. She quietly cleaned up the mess from last night. It was as she was moving that she notice something was on her neck. Her hand reached up to figure out what it was, finding a chain. She followed it to the weight and gasped when she saw it.

His mother’s ring. She bit her lip softly, gazing at the ring with awe. She didn’t notice Poe sitting up and watching her fondly. He cleared his throat, and she jumped slightly as she turned to him.

She walked back over to him, straddling his hips, kissing him.

“Does this mean what I think this means?” She inquired as she sat there.

“Yeah. I want to marry you. I’m… hoping you feel the same way?” He was hesitant.

She looked down at the ring and said, “Yeah. Yeah. I wanna marry you.”

She took off the ring that he gave her on their first date, the pretty pink opal one, and moved it to her left hand.

“I think this one makes a good engagement ring, don’t you? Then you can put this one on me when we get hitch,” She explained tapping on each ring.

“Sounds like a damn good plan. I didn’t get to tell you last night, but I have some time off for the next 2 to 3 weeks. Finn and Leia, on light duty, are going to take over to give me a break. Figured we could use that time to get things done,” He offered with a smirk.

“Sounds good to me. When do we leave?” She asked excited.

“I was thinking around noon. Gives us time to get packed and give out orders. Then we get the Falcon and head out with Bee. Rey will probably join us,” He thought out loud.

She nodded her head getting up again, to finish cleaning up. Poe packed up a bag, and hopped into the refresher to clean up, and got dressed. Once he was done, she got in the refresher as well, and got dressed. She ran over to her room to pack a bag of her stuff; making sure to get her proper credentials and such for when they arrived in Naboo.

Blix met back up with Poe, once that was done, and they waited on each other as they gave out orders for the next few weeks, and to contact them if anything came up.

When they walked up to the Falcon, Rey was waiting for them, BB-8 nearby and chirping happily. The trip to Naboo would take about 3 hours so, they got on board and took off.

Blix directed Poe to where he should land when they arrived, having to give her credential codes to the guards that were still posted at her mother’s home. When they were cleared, they set the Falcon down on the landing pad and Blix stepped off first, greeting the staff that had gathered there.

Poe and Rey stared at the house before them in shock. It was a large and grand home, that was surrounded by beautiful gardens.

Blix looked back at them, wondering why they weren’t with her.

“What?” She asked looking at their shocked faces.

“I… forgot that you were an ambassador’s daughter. Not gonna lie,” Poe answered as he moved forward with Rey.

Blix made a small ‘oh’ as she looked around, somewhat sheepishly.

“Yeah… Sorry. Is this too much?” She examined looking around, rubbing the back of her neck.

“This is where you grew up? Why would you ever leave here?” Rey questioned rushing forward, her eyes wide as she took everything in.

Blix laughed at her reaction, shaking her head. Poe sidled up next to her, wrapping an arm around her shoulders.

“So… when you said there was room for your students and our kids, you literally meant… a school and our own squadron. With room for more,” Poe noted with a nod of his head.

She just smiled in response and led the 2 of them forward.

“Dax. Where did my mother’s personal journals wind up?” She asked an older gentleman as they walked inside.

“They went into storage in one of the spare bedrooms,” Dax explained showing her to said room.

“Thank you,” She said as she opened the door and revealed a room that had several boxes stacked on top of one another.

It took a few minutes, moving aside and rearranging boxes to get to the ones marked as journals and photos. They dragged them forward and began to open them up.

The three of them began to read through and look through the photos together. They spent 2 hours going through them before Rey gasped.

“Oh. Ohmy.” She handed some photos over to Blix.

Blix looked at them seeing her mom, at a base she couldn’t recognize. Her arms were wrapped around a man, who was dark haired, and from the side profile of the first picture, he was scruffy. She looked at the next couple of photos and saw a man who had dark eyes and didn’t appear to smile very often.

In fact, the only photo she found of him smiling, was one where he was looking directly at the camera but at her mother, with a deep fondness.

“Ma did always say I got my too serious attitude from him. I can see why,” She mumbled looking at him, as she gnawed on her bottom lip for a moment.

“He was very handsome,” Rey complimented with a smile.

“Yeah. He was. She calls him Cass in these passages,” Blix noted gesturing toward the journal in her lap. “Apparently… they weren’t… exclusive.”

“Ooh. Intriguing. Cass? Like. Captain Cassian Andor?” Poe questioned looking over shoulder.

Blix shrugged not really knowing who that was.

She continued reading long after Poe and Rey retreated to go eat. Her mother tended to be sporadic when she wrote. Either she would write for days or there would be several months gap between entries.

She seemed to stop writing around completely around the time Blix was 5. Her last entry was expressing pride over a podrace Blix had won.

“She did so well today. She was so excited to win. I wish you were here Cass. You would’ve loved it. I know this isn’t the way either of us expected life to go, but I feel you would’ve been so proud of her.”

She remembered that race, it was a smaller race, but it was her first win. It was done on Tattooine and she was aware of the gangs that were there to watch. Her competitors were Huttese gangsters and she wasn’t going to let them intimidate her.

When she won, she was congratulated by Bib Fortuna himself and it was terrifying. She was trying to not let her nerve show, waiting for her mother to appear, to rescue her. When she did, she remembered her mother looking proud but there was a sadness in her eyes that she never could explain.

This entry explained that.

She set the journal down, staring off into the distance. She was vaguely aware of Poe coming back in and urging her to follow him. He dragged her to the dining room, where dinner was being served and she sat down at the table.

She quietly ate thinking about everything, more questions racing around her mind.

They eventually went to bed, and she struggled to sleep. She tossed around a few times, before Poe eventually draped himself over her, to settle her movements. She fell into a fitful sleep in his arms.

The next morning after they woke up and got ready, they were having breakfast when the doorbell rang. Dax came to her a few minutes later.

“Miss Kenobi. Maureen Holdo is here,” He informed her.

“Maker. What? Does she have this place bugged?” Blix muttered annoyed, stabbing her eggs.

“As far as we are aware, no,” Dax answered with a hint of a smile.

They heard the clicking of heels coming toward them, and a moment later, an older woman with white hair, and a gaunt face appeared.

“Hello Maureen,” Blix greeted dully, taking a bite of her food.

“Stop taking such large bites and sit up straight. I know I taught you better,” Maureen said in a snobbish tone.

Blix rolled her eyes, “I am an adult. You are not my mother. I can do what I want.”

Maureen pursed her lips.

“What brings you back here, Blix dear?” Maureen asked in a tone that stated she didn’t approve.

She looked over her companions with a twinge of disgust she failed to hide.

“Just needed to look at some of mom’s stuff. That’s it. You can go now, Maureen,” She dismissed getting irritated.

“You’re not even going to tell me about your engagement? I can see the ring from here, not blind yet,” Maureen stated, looking expectantly.

“General Poe Dameron of the Resistance. Formerly Captain of the Navy for the Republic. Now. Get. Out.” She demanded standing up facing her.

Dax stepped forward and began to usher Maureen out of the house.

“Tell me when you start to plan the wedding, I’ll send you samples!” She called out as she was urged out.

“That’s Amilyn’s mother? Really?” Rey asked staring in disbelief.

“We…. Are not letting her anywhere near our wedding plans. She didn’t even greet us. Looked at us like we were something foul. I see why you don’t like her,” Poe remarked with a frown.

“Let’s.. just get the journals and such and get out of here. Lock up everything so she can’t get back in,” She grumbled abandoning her food.

“Dax. Please make sure that woman does not have access to any of the rooms in the house. I don’t trust her,” She requested as Dax re-entered the dining room.

Dax nodded telling her it was already being done.

They grabbed the 3 boxes of journals and photos and took them to the Falcon. Poe insisted that they go see his father on Yavin 4.

They were there within an hour. As the Falcon landed, Blix noticed an older man who looked a great deal like Poe, but with greying hair and prominent laugh lines. She suddenly felt nervous as they stepped off and made their way to him.

“Blix. This is my father Kes Dameron. Dad. This is the love my life. This is also Rey, our kid sister,” Poe introduced proudly.

The first thing Kes seemed to notice was the necklace she wore. He glanced between the two of them, a smile growing on his face.

“So, this is my future daughter-in-law that I’ve heard so much about? I was beginning to wonder if you were real, he talked about you so much before you started dating,” Kes spoke bringing her into a hug.

She wasn’t expecting it, but she slowly returned it with a shy smile.

“He’s told me a lot about you and his mom. I wish I could’ve met her. I feel like we would’ve gotten along really well,” Blix said nervously.

“Oh yeah. She would’ve laughed at the hard time you gave him,” Kes laughed leading them onward.

He led them to a small, quaint home that was somewhat away from the nearby town, hidden by the forest around them.

They spent some time telling stories about battles and such. Rey had many questions and Kes answered them with enthusiasm. Blix who was curled up next to Poe on the couch, realized something that she decided to ask Kes once they were alone.

Rey slowly nodded off in her chair, and Poe quietly walked over to her and picked her. He took her to one of the spare bedrooms.

While he was doing that, Blix asked, “Kes… Did you… did you know my mother? Willow Kenobi?”

“Yes. I did. She was sweet lady. Wiz at technology, though she never liked to brag about it,” Kes answered after thinking for a moment.

“Did… Was… Did you know anyone named Cass?” She finally asked trying to phrase it properly.

“Cassian. Yeah. She was in love with him. Only problem was Cassian was in love with the Rebellion. He lived and breathed it. He did care for your mom a great deal, but… he wasn’t one to talk about feelings,” Kes explained with a half shrug. “Why do you ask?”

“I… I think he might be my father? I’m not… not sure. I was shown…visions… of a great deal of things. None of which made sense. Scarif being one of them. I know it’s highly improbable that anyone could still be alive… but… but I have to check,” She rambled slightly, fiddling with her shirt nervously.

“Mh. Makes sense. She wasn’t really one to sleep around. She only had eyes for him. This is clearly important to you. So, find your answers. Just know they might not be what you’re expecting,” He cautioned, patting her knee comfortingly.

She nodded in response, and followed Poe to their room, when he returned, wishing Kes a good night.

They spent a few days there, getting to know one another, and making some plans for the wedding. Poe was excited and happy to see his father, and she could tell that when they were leaving, it made him sad. He was trying his best to hide it though.

They stood outside the Falcon, and Blix offered, “So… When we finally figure out where we want to live and such, you are perfectly allowed to visit as often as you’d like.”

“Ooh. I may take you up on that and you may regret it slightly,” Kes said in a teasing voice.

Poe looked at her appreciatively and kissed the side of her head.

“Unless we stay at your mom’s home in Naboo. Turn it into a school for Force-sensitive kids,” Poe stated, before mumbling “Have a squadron of our own kids.”

Blix smiled, feeling her cheeks turn red as Kes laughed and Rey snickered at them.

They said their goodbyes and hopped on board the Falcon. It was going to take a few hours to reach what was left of Scarif. She wasn’t sure what they were going to find there. She simply knew… she had to check it out.

[vigilantesanonymous]

and the thing is, i’m not scared anymore (part 3)

In which you are a healer being held against your will by the First Order. There are legends swirling around the galaxy of a great Sith healer, one that can bring a man back to life, all without Jedi power. But to you, you’re just a girl stuck on a planet with nowhere to go, left to rot there for the rest of your life. That is, until a cocky and utterly charming Resistance pilot crashes in to save you. (So kinda like Tangled but make it Star Wars. Only kinda though.)

Word count: 2811 (she’s a long one)

***

Back on the base in D’Qar, Poe took great pride in introducing me to everyone. I felt like I annoyed him, being his perpetual shadow, but if it did bother him, he didn’t let me know it. He would make sure I knew who to talk to, and introduced me to all of his friends. Finn, the former Stormtrooper, and Rey, the Jedi in training. Both of them shared a look when they noticed how Poe oh-so-casually had his arm slung over my shoulders. Or how protective he would get if any of the other pilots started talking to me for too long, pulling me away because he “has to show me something important”. Any time I was to meet with Leia to see if I could remember any other important information, Poe always made sure that he was free to escort me to her and stayed with me the entire meeting, always there to lend a supportive hand squeeze or knee rub if I was nervous. I heard whispers that he had even turned down a mission just to be with me for one of those mundane meetings. And Poe Dameron is not one to turn down a mission. 

I really want to believe that he feels something more than the bond of a friendship. But who am I kidding? The first man that I meet outside of the First Order, like me? It’s too much to hope for. Something like that wouldn’t happen, it would be too good to be true. I forbade myself from really considering that it could be a possibility. That didn’t stop me from indulging in the occasional daydream, however, of Poe running out of his X-wing to swing me around in his arms and-

I’m pulled out of my thoughts by a knocking on the door. Speak of the Devil, and he shall appear. “Mind if I come in?” Poe asks. He’s in his flight suit, presumably back from a spin around the galaxy. He’s the only man I’ve ever seen make those putrid orange suits look good.

“Yeah, of course!”

“So I have something for you,” he says as he plops down next to me on the bed. “You haven’t tried gi dumpling soup,” he grins. “I got some for us, so you can try it. You tell me, my chambers or yours?” This is one of Poe’s favorite pastimes: finding foods from all over the galaxy that I haven’t tried. All I had was whatever was in the Imperial rations that they pushed at me. Sometimes I still think it hasn’t fully settled in yet that I never left that room where I was kept, because he’ll ask me if I’ve tried something, and then rave for at least ten minutes about how “It’s so good, you absolutely have to try it, I mean you haven’t lived if you haven’t tried it at least once!” I mean, he’s said that too about doing a barrel roll in an X-wing, but we’re taking baby steps, and starting with food first. 

“I don’t mind, we can eat it wherever,” I say, really not answering his question. I would eat in a womp rat pit if it meant I got to be with you, I think to myself. 

“Okay then, I’m making an executive decision. We’re going back to mine.” He takes my hands in his and pulls me up, forcing me to follow him down the hall to his quarters. Though his are somewhat larger than mine, Poe apparently insisted that my quarters be as close to his as possible. Leia was unwilling to uproot the other people living in the rooms next to him, so Poe had to settle for having me just down the hall from him. 

We set ourselves up comfortably on the bed, my leg hanging off the side and swinging lazily as we dig into all the goodies Poe brought. 

“Woah, this is really good!” 

“See, I told ya!” Poe says with his signature grin. “Have as much as you want. Have my portion too, if you want.” His stomach growls, making us both giggle. “Okay, maybe don’t do that. Maybe I just said that to be nice,” he chuckles before digging into his own bowl. 

“You know you don’t have to do this for me, right?” I ask.

“I know. I do it because I want to.” Poe tries to act nonchalant but I can see there’s something stirring behind his dark eyes. “Do you not want me to?”

“No! I really like this- I just…” I taper. “I worry about what everyone says around the base.”

“What do they say around the base?” He tenses up, defensive. 

I sigh, embarrassed. “That I’m naive. And that I’m too dumb to see this for what it is. I don’t know what they’re talking about- I like being friends with you. I really do. You’re the first person I’ve connected with. And I appreciate so much all that you’ve done for me Poe- I really don’t know how I will ever properly show you my gratitude.”

“I’ve already told you, you don’t have to repay me for anything. You saved my life, okay? I think we’re even there.”

“That was not even that bad of a wound that I healed-”

“-It could have become life threatening, but you healed me and that’s what counts. And for the guys on base? They’re just jealous that you’re talking to me instead of them, I’m sure of it.”

“Who knew being humble was part of your charm,” I joke, making him blush.

“I have been wondering something though,” he says slowly.

“And what is that?”

Cut off from his thoughts, we whip around to the sound of a knock on the door. It opens, revealing none other than General Leia herself. “I thought I would find you two together,” Leia says with a tender smile. “I have a mission for the both of you, if you’re up to it.”

“Trying to get rid of me already General?” Poe says with a playful sigh. 

“Always, Dameron,” she chides back. 

“What is it General?” I ask eagerly. 

“As you know, we have a spy providing valuable information to us. The spy wants to meet, but to leave the ship would be too risky for them. Therefore, we have to come to them. I have an idea.”

*

Leia’s idea was for Poe and I to look like First Order snobs, so that way we would blend in on the Finalizer. The plan is to slip in, get information from the spy, and slip out. The only thing about it? It sounded just a little too easy. 

“This doesn’t seem right,” Poe says as we walk down the hall. “I mean, no one noticed us coming in? No troopers, no guards, no nothing? I don’t trust this.”

“You shouldn’t,” a malicious voice says from behind us. Before I can even comprehend what’s happening, stormtroopers flood into the hall in front of us, effectively cutting us off from our path. I spin around to be greeted with the sight of a tall red headed man in a general’s uniform. “I can’t believe the Resistance would really be so stupid as to take the bait,” the man says with a confident smirk. Wait- red hair, general… General Hux! “Take the girl to holding quarters. As for the pilot- execute him, and make it quick.” 

Poe’s face falls as he looks over to me. For the first time in my life, I see the hopeful glint leave Poe’s dark eyes. He swallows hard, and a sense of finality that I’ve never felt before comes over me. It can’t end like this; I won’t let it.

“Wait!” I cry. Hux snaps his head to me, looking both annoyed and intrigued. “You can’t kill him.”

“Oh, and why is that?” he sneers.

“Because,” I start, trying to steady my voice. “If you kill him, I will never, ever, stop trying to get away from you. I’ll do everything I can to make sure that your masters and your men die, and refuse to use my power for them. But if you let him go-”

“No!” Poe chokes out, but a Stormtrooper puts a hand over his mouth to allow me to finish. I can see him begging me not to say what I’m going to say next.

“If you let him go,” I say quietly. “I will never fight you. I will do anything you say, anything you want me to. I will never try to get away from you again, and you can lock me in another cage and I’ll accept my fate and just rot there for the rest of my life. But you have to let him go. You have to let Poe live.”

A devilish grin spreads across Hux’s features. “His life for yours? You really want to trade your life for a scrappy Resistance pilot’s?” He looks me over, seeing that I’m genuine and I mean to keep my promise. “Fine.” He turns on his heel to Poe. “This is your lucky day. I’m feeling generous, and our little girl’s speech here has changed my mind. You will go back to your base and never return. Understand?” He looks to the head of the squadron, his features twisting in disgust. “Get him out of my sight and off of this ship as quickly as possible.”

The Stormtroopers turn in unison, shoving Poe down the hall. He tries to jostle out of their grip, get their hand off of his mouth, but to no avail. We lock eyes for a split second, and then he’s pulled out of sight. That’s the last I see of my best friend.

Alone in the hallway, Hux latches onto my arm and drags me down the hallways to one of the prisoner holds. “You stupid, naive girl,” he huffs as he drags me along behind him. His nails are digging so deep there will be bruises left behind for sure. I’m trying to keep up with his pace but the towering man’s gait is too much for me to keep up with. “You think that he cares for you? You are just another tool to the side of the Resistance, nothing more. He left without saying a word, and you sacrificed your life for him!” One of the shiny black doors of the prisoner hold slides open, Hux flinging me inside like a rag doll. “Welcome to the rest of your life,” he says with a smirk.

“Wait!” I grip onto his wrist, not letting him pull out of my hold on him. “Did you really let him live?”

Hux sneers, his face inches from mine. “Of course I did. Poe Dameron being alive will only cause Kylo Ren more agony, which is exactly what I want. He has been prowling the galaxy for you, and the fact that there’s another man out there means that he’ll never, truly have you.” He straightens up, looking around to make sure that no one heard him before stepping back. “I’ll be punished for saving your precious little pilot, but seeing his inevitable tantrum will be worth it.” And with that, the black metal doors sliding back together seamlessly and Hux is gone. 

I sink to the floor, tears dripping off of my face onto the polished black metal. It’s freezing in here, which only adds to the overwhelming feeling of despair that’s enveloping me. Who knows if Hux will even keep his promise? It wouldn’t be the first time that a member of the First Order lied to get what they wanted. Especially with all that talk about Kylo Ren… It’s only meant to confuse me more, I’m sure. I could be here stranded, separated from Poe, and he could even be- no, I can’t think that, I won’t. If I lose hope, then they’ll have me in their grip forever. But if I fight them, and keep hoping against hope that Poe will be okay, then I have a fighting chance. 

*

Time passes slowly. The lights in the hallways are always on, making it impossible to sleep. Marching of Stomtroopers can be heard in the never ending hallways, the same stomp at all hours. It’s either that or the haunting silence of the ship. The sound of space is blocked out, so I don’t even have that to comfort me, to escape into. Every surface is hard and uncomfortable, so even if I try to lay down each and every one of my bones hurt. The room is too small to pace; I only make it two and a half strides before having to turn on my heel. I know that someone will come to rescue me, but when? It already feels like it’s been weeks, but I’m sure that realistically it’s only been a few days. 

My mind keeps wandering to Poe. Why couldn’t I have just swallowed my pride and told him how I feel? I keep replaying our parting in my mind, wishing I had screamed out that I loved him before we were separated. 

But is it love? Or am I just being naive? I’ve never been in love before- I read all about it in the fairytale books that I had back in my prison, but those are just stories. I’m not a princess, and there isn’t a prince that will come save me. Just because he broke me out of my prison doesn’t mean that he loves me. It was a mission! Maybe I am just a means to an end for the Resistance. Maybe there really is no one in the galaxy that I can trust. 

For the first time in days, the doors to my cell slide open. I’m greeted by the sight of two Stormtroopers. Great, I think, Poe’s voice echoing in my mind. More of them.

“We’re here to escort you to Supreme Leader Kylo Ren,” one of them says. Even through the garbling of the helmet, that voice sounds familiar to me. 

Realization washes over me quickly. “Finn?” I whisper, just barely audible. 

The trooper looks down the hall before poking his head in, pulling off the helmet. Sure enough, Finn is underneath, grinning at me. “This is a rescue. You really thought that we were going to leave you here?!” 

“I just really can’t believe it!” I can feel my heart thumping out of my chest with excitement. I still feel in a stupor of shock, I mean after being stuck for so long this feels like a dream. “Who’s with you?” I ask, looking over to the other person.

“I think you know,” Finn says with a wink. “We need to get out of here though, like now.” He shoves his helmet back on, shoving fake shackles around my wrists. 

Poe. I can feel it that it’s him. The two of them line up behind me, the three of us walking briskly down the hall. I try my hardest to contain my excitement at being rescued, and it’s all I can do to keep from crying tears of joy at the sight of the Falcon. “Let’s get you outta here, Sweetheart,” I hear Poe’s voice say through the garbling of the helmet. They easily shoot the two troopers in front of the Falcon who no doubt were trying to figure out who the ship belonged to. I toss off the fake shackles, sprinting into the ship and sitting in complete awe as we zoom away from yet another one of my prisons. 

On our way back to D’Qar, I hear someone coming down the hall. In their haste to get out of danger, Finn and Poe forgot to take off their helmets. Slowly, the man in front of me pulls off his helmet, revealing Poe’s grinning face underneath. “Miss me, Sweetheart? Because I sure missed you.”

“Poe!” I slam myself into his arms, feeling them pull me off the ground to swing me around. “I missed you, so much. I almost thought you were dead, and I just… I never thought I would see you again.” My eyes begin to sting as I feel tears start welling up in the corners of my eyes. 

Poe cups my face in his hand, pulling me up to look at him. “I would never, ever leave you, you hear me?” His thumb rubs slowly across my cheek, the two of us just gazing into each other’s eyes. “I was too scared to tell you before, but I realized something. I realized that the scariest thing in the galaxy is losing you. And the thing is, I’m not scared anymore, because I know we’ll come back to each other, always.” He takes a deep breath, pausing before continuing what he’s going to say. “I love you,” he breathes. 

“Poe?”

“Yes?”

“Just kiss me already.”