#and Finn having a straight up breakdown!!

[this-is-snekky]

Got a little too silly; couldn't resist drawing this very silly drawing by @deer-diary-from-hell

Teeeheee!!! Gave them some bandages and a few extra details to really emphasize how battered and broken they are, hehehehehehe!!!!!!

[teambyler]

(Spoiler) Noah Schnapp is CLEARLY trying to avoid spoiling something MAJOR about Mike and Will here! (Breakdown with TIMESTAMPS)

Okay Tom Holland, Noah Schnapp lol.

I'm usually a very careful person, and so I mean it when I say that this video of Noah at a recent con is the biggest confirmation of Byler endgame we've ever gotten.

0:04: Noah's NERVOUSNESS combined with TRYING TO SUPPRESS GIDDY EXCITEMENT in the first 5 seconds. His literal first reaction to a question about how Mike and Will's relationship has evolved was "You guys can't get me in trouble! I don't wanna say anything! Spoiler..."

0:16: Mike and Will's relationship "had its ups and downs in the beginning..." In the beginning? It was never down in the beginning mah dude, not until Season 3. By "the beginning" he's contrasting everything before to NOW (Season 5)! Now, when things are FINE, and as Mike said they're "a team..."

0:24 "Mike was always super protective of Will and Will always leaned on him, and you could never really tell if it was something romantic or just a really special friendship" !!!!!!

0:33 "And as it goes on you kinda realize that Will does have... Am I allowed to say this?" Noah should know he can say Will likes Mike: Noah told the press 2 years ago that Will loves Mike. Either his mind is GLITCHING because he's afraid he'll spoil something, or he thinks that JUST TALKING about Mike and Will's history is a spoiler for some reason! =)

0:41 Cara: "Ummm.... I don't know!" She knows that "yes" would encourage him to say more and "no" would sound like they're hiding something. Noah: "I don't wanna talk about this!"

0:47 Throughout Cara's entire talk Noah is GRINNING and he's trying his best to hide it. Clearly just THINKING about Mike and Will makes this gay boy wanna giggle. It literally feels like HE is Will and someone's there talking about his relationship with his boyfriend who he can't stop thinking about.

0:58 Cara saves Noah but then beats around the bush and talks about friends growing together and apart. She says they diverge and "Mike goes on his journey" while Will remains "stuck." Then she says "...So I think in Season 5..." and Noah gives her a LOOK knowing that they have to be careful here. Then Cara talks about SOMETHING ELSE entirely, pretending she never started the sentence! She says it's "a friendship evolving" and that friends can grow apart and together, "and we'll see what happens"(!) What ELSE could this all mean but that they grow closer together after growing apart in season 3? And that Mike's "journey" was one of self-discovery? (From all the glimpses of s5 we're getting, Mike's clearly not "journeying" far from Will's side!)

1:39 Even though Noah should know better (lol), he chimes in AGAIN to say something about Mike and Will and dig another hole for Cara to dig them out of! Then he thinks better of it: "Actually I"m not gonna say anything."

In another clip from this talk, Noah says that in nearly every scene he's done on the show Finn/Mike has been there. The way he talks about it, it's clear he's reminiscing about his entire experience with the show including Season 5, where they're sharing all their scenes again. Mike and Will's relationship is important to Noah, who of course is gay.

In that same clip, Cara says it'll be easier to answer these questions when the show is over. Noah: "It's just so hard to talk about it. It's so secretive and we don't wanna get in trouble."

It's extremely clear that Noah and Cara do not want to give a MAJOR SPOILER ABOUT MIKE AND WILL.

In s5, Mike HAS to find out Will loves him because of the Painting Lie. If what results is that Mike rejects Will because he's straight, which the vast majority of the audience already assumes, would they be this secretive about it?

Of course not.

Plus, they're so careful to NOT DENY THE POSSIBILITY of Byler endgame either, which they can do EASILY. ("Will loves his straight best friend..." or "Mike's only interested in El...") That would've been a NON-STORY. They're going OUT OF THEIR WAY not to rule out Byler. AND they fully know that teasing the audience with it only for it NOT to happen would be queerbaiting.

Byler doubt? Never knew ya.

-teambyler

[fandoms--fluff]

The Things I’d Do For You

Older Mikaelson sister reader x Hope Mikaelson

Summary: Hope distances herself away from you and everyone so you go to her school, and comfort her through a breakdown about your dead family members and her fears and guilt and everything

Warnings: mentions of death, swearing

A/n: very fluffy but angst at the same time i think? And of course had to incorporate Alaric bashing. Currently working on more hope content!!!!!!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Some would think with the mass age difference of six hundred between you and your younger sister, Hope, that the two of you wouldn’t be that close. But it’s the total opposite. Ever since Hope met you and you guys have bonded, you’ve been closer with each other than anybody else. 

You may have different mothers, both are dead, but you still feel close to one another either if you were half sister like now or full sisters. 

Your mother abandoned you when you were very young, and even when she was there, she wasn’t ever the best mother anyways. You crossed paths with your father, the original Klaus Mikaelson, when you were in England in 1492 after you were turned almost a century prier from being killed by ironically, a vampire, when you were 19. He was on his journey to just about complete the sacrifice with Katerina Petrova in some little days when you showed up. He automatically could tell you were connected to him in the first couple minutes of talking. Something about you seemed so similar. 

That’s when he got you to open up about your past that you both put together what had happened. Starting when your mother and him had a long relationship until she ran away one day with no trace to follow. Like she evaporated out of existence, fell off the face of the Earth. She was pregnant with you, their daughter and obviously hadn’t wanted Klaus to find out about you and tried to do everything in her power to get rid of you, not knowing you’d be a first born Mikaelson witch-tribrid when you were born. 

It was the first time in a while that Klaus had openly showed affection with anyone, but with you, he didn’t skip a heart beat. After meeting for the first time and connecting with your father, you guys had went your separate ways, Klaus not wanting Mikael to find out about you. 

You had kept in touch with each other, meeting all your aunts and uncles, besides from Finn until Mystic Falls in 2010 and Freya later on after you came back to New Orleans because a call from your uncle Elijah about something he shouldn’t tell you over the phone. After that, you quickly packed your things and left Mystic Falls after saying goodbye to your friends, Caroline, Stefan, Bonnie, and Damon. 

After everything that had went down over the years when Hope was growing up and learning how you were her sister and about your past. She always made it clear that she looked up to you and wanted to be like you, someone who’d drop everything to help her family. You didn’t know how to feel about that when she first told you after you read her a bed time story when she was six, but after that, you knew how special you are to her. Even your dad and Hayley pulled you aside to say how grateful they were to have you stay in Hope’s life even though you had every right to not want to. 

She had started sneaking into your room at night when she was supposed to be asleep when she was seven. It woke you up straight away when you heard the doorknob turn, but after a while you knew how to tell it was her. You’d always welcome her into your arms and let her cuddle you to her hearts contents. 

It slowed down for a couple years when she was entering her teenage years, thinking that she was too old for it, but caved a couple times. 

It picked up greatly after your guys’ dad and uncle Elijah died, plus her mom, Hayley, who you were starting to consider a mother figure yourself. And it hadn’t stopped or slowed down, not that your complaining though, it’s just when she was younger she’d always tell you when somethings wrong or if she just wanted cuddles. Now, she barely opens up, and when she does, it’s when she’s on the brink of a meltdown and you calmly pull her out of it. 

-

Like right now, you’re really worried about your baby sister. She hasn’t phoned or texted you for a couple days now since going back to the boarding school after winter break. You’re getting anxious about what might happen, considering everything that happened with the boy that she was dating and he had died the previous year. 

You’re pacing back and forth in your room at the abattoir when you feel a presence in the doorway. “What are you doing here Marcel?” You stop your pacing and turn over to look at the younger vampire. 

“I just wanted to check in on you, I haven’t seen you out in a couple days” he says and comes into the room, standing in front of you. 

“I’m just worries about Hope, I haven’t heard anything from her in almost a week and she hasn’t been answering my phone calls or texts. I’m trying to figure out if I did something to make her mad at me, or if I forgot about something and she’s mad about that” you rant to him. 

“Hey, take a deep breath, I’m sure everything is fine. How about you go visit her, and if your nervous, you have friends there that can also give you a helping hand about it, right?”

“Yeah, thanks Marcel” you guys quickly hug before he leaves and you start packing a bag. 

-

Once you get to Mystic Falls, you were about to turn around from the school and just go over to see Damon, but before you can, you get a phone call from an unknown caller. Sighing, you answer it, not having any reason not to. 

A voice quickly starts speaking, “Hey Y/n, I’m Lizzie, Hope’s friend- kinda friend? from school. I know from what Hope had told me about you that you dont like to be disturbed, but I think you might want to know about this.”

“What happened, is hope alright?” you ask concerned. 

“I don’t know, she hasn’t left her room besides for necessaties and won’t talk to any of us. I was wondering how fast you can get here, I know it’s far from New Orleans but I’m worried about her. It’s as if she’s turned off her emotions even though she hasn’t activated her vampire part” Lizzie quickly tells you, worry evident in the girl’s voice. 

“Hey, hey, sweetie, calm down, it’s going to be okay. Believe it or not, I was just on my way to the school, I’ll be there in five minutes, okay?” You soften your tone. 

“Okay, thanks” she says, clear that she’s taking deep breathes before hanging up. 

You put your phone down and immediately step on the gas, breaking more than one speed limit getting to the boarding school in record time. As you step into the school, you see a tall blond girl leaning against a wall, waiting anxiously. 

You walk over to her, and place your hand on her shoulder. “You must be Lizzie, right?” You say.

“Yeah, sorry about the panicked phone call, I didn’t know who else to phone” she murmured, calming from your gentle touch.

“It’s alright, I know you’re worried, is Hope in her room?” You asked, already knowing the answer. “Um, yeah. The last time she came out was to take a shower last night” she tells you. 

“Okay, thanks Lizzie. I’ll see you later” you smile and squeeze the siphoner’s shoulder before making your way to your sister’s room. 

You knock on her door, not getting an answer, but you know she’s in there from her breathing and heart beat. You memorized how they sound when she was younger in case anything happened. 

Unlocking the door with your magic, you walk into her room. Her back is facing the now closed door and you, “I thought I made it clear I didn’t want you Lizzie” Hope sternly says, not noticing it’s you and not her blond friend. 

“Good thing I’m not Lizzie then” you tell her, crossing your arms over your chest. 

Hope immediately freezes, realizing who is in her room. It’s definitely not her frenemy, but her big sister. The same sister who she’s been ignoring for almost a week. The same sister who she knows was worried the second she made her phone calls go to voicemail.

She doesn’t know what to do, but she does turn around, which she doesn’t know if it’s a smart move or not, seeing the stern and worrisome look you have. 

“Y/n” she mumbles. 

“Hey Hope, I want you to know that I’m not mad at you” you tell her, slowly making your way over to her. She lets out a breath of air she didn’t even know she was holding in. 

“All I want to know is why you’ve been pushing everyone who cares about you away” you crouch down in front of where she’s sitting on her bed. 

She shakes her head, trying to avoid eye contact with you. 

You look over to her nightstand and see pictures and small trinkets laid out in a haphazard manner. Looking closer, you notice the pictures are the ones you printed for her when she was 12. They’re some of her, you, your guys’ family, both of you in selfies from when she was really young. 

You reach over and pick a handful of them up. “I remember this day, I took you to the zoo and you wouldn’t leave the lion exhibit because you were waiting for Simba to come over to you and have a conversation with him. I’m pretty sure Hayley despised me for allowing you to watch Lion King all those times, she said one day you’d drive her crazy with how much you sang the songs” you hand Hope the photo. 

She chuckled, tears forming in her eyes. “I remember, I kept begging mom to go back to the zoo with you after. I was committed to try talking to a lion” she looked back up at you with a sad smile, remembering the day more clearly. 

You see the emotion in her face, you smile knowing you’re getting somewhere. Digging another one out of the pile. “Oh, this was a fun day. Dad took us to the ice cream place and allowed us to get whatever we wanted. By the end of the day you had, I swear, the biggest sugar high ever.” 

Hope took the photo handed to her, it shows a picture that you’re taking with your phone with your guys’ dad across the table and her beside you with ice cream all around her mouth. “Mom yelled at dad the second she saw me” Hope’s smile widened. 

“Yeah, boy did he get a talking to. But even through all that, you still somehow fell asleep in my arms, and ironically it was during the loudest part of it” you say, making you both chuckle. 

You sort through the pictures in your hands, pausing after seeing a specifically worn out one with light yellow aging on the outline.  

“Hm, now where’d you get this one?” You say with a risen eyebrow, lifting a picture of you from the 1840s. You’ve been looking for it in your room at the abattoir but you had a hunch of where it went, and it seems you were right. 

Hope pauses for a second, realizing she got caught with something. “...I may have taken it from your room. It was after m-mom died and I couldn’t find you, but I saw this on your dresser. And I thought you looked to so pretty in it, I took it because... I don’t know really. I guess I was scared that you were going to leave too and maybe having something close to you from your history made me think that it help with my paranoia.” your younger sister slowly explained, thinking back to when she took it. 

“You were really scared, weren’t you?” You softly say more than ask.

“Mhm, I thought you’d be next. But then it was Dad and Uncle Elijah. I’m so scared you’re gonna leave me too” Hope sobbed, finally breaking after not talking for so long about it. 

You immediately put the pictures down and lean forward from where you’re still crouching and pull her into your arms. One of your hands lay on the back of her head, rubbing your finger tips in slow circles. It’s something you used to do when she’d come to you with nightmares. 

“Oh sweetie, I’m so sorry you’ve felt this way. You don’t have to worry, I’m not going anywhere, I won’t let anyone make me leave you ever again” you tell her and kiss her forehead. 

You wrap your arm tightly and securely around Hope’s lower back. After a second, you stand up, carrying her. Her legs automatically wrap around your torso and she clings to you tighter than before, letting her emotions out as she cries into your neck. 

“E-everyone around me d-dies. I th-thought if I distanced myself from everyone then n-no one else would die” she explains her actions to you through her sobs. 

You start walking around the room and slightly bouncing her as if she were a baby. Some may find it weird that you’re doing this with a fifteen year old but it’s starting to calm her down, so screw what other people may think weird about it. 

 “Baby, that would seem like the best choice at the moment, but after a while you’ll feel so alone until you don’t feel at all. Think of it as a human humanity switch. No one, especially me, wants you to go through it, it’s horrible” you tell her, your own eyes starting to water from how your sister has been feeling. 

She clings to you, her arms wrapped around your neck, like a koala. She doesn’t want anyone else she loves to die. “I want them to come back” she whimpers through her crying. 

“Me too, me too. If I could just wave my hand and have them appear, I would.” You go back over to her bed and sit down on it with Hope now sitting on your lap, not wanting to let you go.

“I-I miss Mommy and Dadddy and uncle ‘Lijah” she mumbles, trying to blink her tears away. 

"Oh I know you do, I know sweet girl" you comfort her, rubbing your hand in circles on her back. You feel horrible for not realizing it sooner, how she felt on the inside about all of this. But who can blame her, she's only fifteen and lost so many important people in her life, and now scares that by getting close to anyone will send them to their death beds aswell.

She nuzzles further into your chest and scrunches up fistfuls of your shirt in her hands. Looking to the side, you see the simba stuffed animal you got Hope for christmas when she was eight in front of her pillows.

You unwrap one of your arms from the fifteen year old and grab the stuffed animal. Kissing Hope's forehead, you slowly start to move a couple inches away from her, earning you a whine of protest. Before she crashes back into you, you press the stuffed animal to her chest.

"You still have this" you say softly. She looks down and slowly unwraps her arms from you, noticing what you're talking about.

She picks Simba up into her arms and snuggles him after a couple back and forth glance between you and the stuffed animal. "Would never get rid of him, you gave it to me" she pouts at how you dare would've thought that, behind the lion's head.

-

“Well now I know where all my things are going” you softly chuckled, noticing the reason why the sweater Hope is wearing looks so familiar, it’s yours.

"You're clothes are just comfier" she mumbles into your chest, the lion held tight in her left arm.

"Is that right?" You ask with a teasing smile on your face. "Mhm."

"You're not gonna leave. Right?" She looks up at you with widened puppy eyes. "I'm not going to leave, I promise" you brushed the hair out of her face. You get an approving nod, before laying back into her big sister.

"I think it's time I move back into our old house" you say and she looks up at you with confusion. "Oh, right you've never been there, have you?" You ask. She shakes her head.

"Well, our dad built-actually got hybrids to build it, but that's whatever, a mansion just outside of town, and I'm pretty sure everything's still there. All I have to do is pack some things and get the keys to it from New Orleans before moving back in. I can't believe Alaric never told you about it- actuay I do believe that, he's an ass" you tell her.

"Wanna know a secret?" She whispers into your ear like she's seven again. "Of course" you whisper back.

"I think he's an ass too" she smiles, getting an affirming smile and nod from you. "Now you're speaking my language" you kiss the top of her head.

"I love you, y/n/n" she tells you.

"I love you too, little sis."

[eddieydewr]

I have actually seen people say his career is on rapid decline 😂. These sweet little innocent babes are so very sheltered lmao. A 19 year old drinking is not a story. It's nothing. Who the fuck doesn't act like that when they are college aged? Besides that, he has been on the receiving end of nothing but made up shit for months and people just believe yet another story with zero evidence. Let's recap the fake shit people have said about him: - He hates Palestinians - He's a racist, genocidal maniac - He fights with his co-stars - He got dropped from brand deals - He had a mental breakdown on set - He is a pedophile - He's being isolated from his co-stars on set and they won't talk to him - He's being written out of the show and they changed the story And now - he got drunk at a bar and made a scene. At a time when things have been going well for him and the haters are pissed all of the things listed above are proving over and over again to not be true. The best they can come up with now is that he was drinking. Because they are that easily scandalized. Even if it is true, who the fuck cares? It would be the first true thing people have said about him in months. These stories say nothing about Noah and everything about the people who make them up. I'm not even surprised by the amount of people having a mental breakdown over this. This fandom is full of dumb drama. But people need to realize that the only reason that anything on that list above got so much traction is because they kept talking about it. So if you feel bad for Noah that all these people are constantly coming after him and making things up/dramatizing things, don't give them fuel and instead ignore the dumb shit they say. Rumors mean nothing when no one is discussing them.

rapid decline 😭 if finn quit acting to focus on behind the scenes stuff and his music, they’ll say it’s part of his trajectory but if noah does it, they will be like HAHA FLOPPED. even though noah always said he doesn’t plan on acting full time and is interested in doing everything he possibly can, which is already evident with his lifeguarding and volunteering work, setting up businesses, working with brands and sponsorships…

not to be dramatic but i rly think they want noah to kill himself. they just don’t realise the full effect of their words and actions. because they just say it on the internet. them, of all people, should understand what it’s like because i see them get angry at rowling for her part in endangering trans people… on twitter. noah has his own beliefs but he clearly isn’t genocidal, doesn’t hate palestinians, and he’s simply living his life but he’s somehow the worst person to live. their behaviour reminds me of young millennials when they hated on justin bieber. they thought it was funny to make rape and murder jokes about him when he was a kid, way before he started doing stupid stuff. the same happened to noah before 10/7. they’ve always hated him for being “cringe” aka jewish and possibly gay (or straight but simply a melt like bieber). and millie with the homophobic memes.

i know it’s best to ignore shit and not add fuel to the fire but i think the whole culture needs to change. especially when they claim they’re doing it because they care about a certain cause, like palestine. like besties, no. you’ve wanted noah dead for years because haha, memes.

[callsign-cacti]

Okay, it's bed time

Pairing: Finnegan x Reader

Word Count: 1.8k

Warnings: COLLEGE WORKLOAD, Finn being sweet

Summary: When Finn comes over to your place to study, he doesn't expect to actually have to study. And he really doesn't expect the breakdown that ensues because of the studying.

Nevertheless, he finds himself staying...

Notes: This is extremely self indulgent, and was written during a breakdown after I realized exactly how much I have to do before sunday night. So of course, instead of actually doing the work, I wrote this.

Tagging my fellow Finn lovers

@sebsxphia @lorecraft @topguncortez @veritable-trash @callsignspark @callsignvalley

----

“Alright, that’s it! You’re done for the night!” Finn declared, reaching across the bed to pluck the textbook and your notes from your hand.

“No, just a few more minutes!” You cry, shifting away from him.

“Yeah, that’s what you said ten minutes ago.”

“Well, I haven’t really gotten this concept.” You flip the page, glancing back and forth between your textbook and your notes, brows furrowed in confusion.

“It’s an important one…” At this, Finn leaned closer to glance at your notes, hoping that maybe he help explain it to you so that you would finally set the goddamned books down.

His brows furrowed, leaning closer. You were a diligent note taker, hell, he couldn’t count how many times he had stolen your notebook for a night to copy down his own notes from yours instead of actually listening in the lecture. But these, these weren’t even on the topic you had outlined at the top of the page. They were barely even in English.

He moved quickly, knowing that the element of surprise would be the best way to go with you, because you had a damn strong grip when you wanted to. Plucking the books straight out of your hands, he tossed them behind him. They landed with a thunk on the floor, causing you to look up at him, confused as to what the sound was.

It took a few seconds for what had just happened to click, looking down at your lap only to find it empty.

“What the hell Finn?”

“Honey, you’re exhausted. You need sleep!”

“No!” You lunged as you protested, but Finn was quicker, and you were slow in your exhaustion, and he caught your shoulders, gently pushing you back onto the bed.

“Your notes barely made sense. You have been studying literally all day, you’re exhausted, and you don’t need to study any more tonight!”

This afternoon, when you had invited Finn to study with you after class, he had readily agreed, positive that it would be fifteen minutes of studying before he had you in his lap. But when he had barged in after his practice, book in hand and condom in his pocket, he had found you on the floor with papers surrounding you, angrily muttering to yourself as you shuffled through your physics textbook.

So he had plopped himself down next to you, and together, the two of you worked your way through the homework that had you practically tearing your hair out.

He was positive that he would be rewarded for helping you, smug as he thought about all the ways you could thank him as he watched you organize your notes, only to pull out another textbook and plop yourself down at the desk.

Since then, Finn had taken a nap, and raided your snack drawer, finished four chapters in his book, and had two beers. He was getting up to get the third when he noticed you swaying in your seat, eyes glazed as you stared down at your notes.

“Don’t tell me what to do Finn. I’m not fucking done, that exam is in two days, and if I don’t pass this then…”

“Your grade drops, and so does your GPA, and if your GPA drops, then you won’t get the internship, no internship, no job, no job no life. Yeah, I heard it the first ten times you told it to me, and every time after that. But what you’re doin right now isn’t helping, it’s hurting. You need some sleep and you can study in the morning!”

He knew he had lost you halfway through his little rant, your eyes sliding from him and back to your textbook. And then, you were up and out of the bed, darting across the room in an attempt to reach your stuff before he could grab you, only to trip over your legs.

But Finn was faster,launching himself off the bed, wrapping his arms around your middle and pulling you back to him.

“Little clumsy there, aren’tcha!”

You could hear Finn laughing, but it seemed like your head was filled with cotton. You needed to study more. Because failing wasn’t an option.

When he was met with your silence, he stopped laughing. Tears were falling down your face, lip wobbling as you desperately tried not to break down in front of him.

“Hey!” Gently, Finn placed you back on the bed, planting his hands on either side of you, and ducking down to break your gaze away from the textbook.

“Listen, you got this in the bag honey. You know you’re gonna ace this exam, second only to me, of course! But hey, not everyone can be perfect all the time, right?”

And that seemed to wake you up, because suddenly, you were shoving him off of you, sending him stumbling backwards.

“Fuck you Finn!”

“Woah, what…”

“Fuck you! Fuck you for barely even having to crack open a book and still get better grades then those of us who bust our asses. And you don’t even fuckin care. You don’t care about anything, except for going to fucking nationals and getting pussy and getting high and just having a great fucking time at college. Cause it should be fun right, why stress about it when you know you’ll probably waltz right out of this goddamned town and get some great job and be set for life!”

You pause, taking a deep breath, and Finn cautiously takes a reaches for you, but your far from done.

“Fuck you for trying to tell me that this doesn’t matter, because it does! This isn’t a joke Finn, this is my life!”

And then, he puts his foot right in his fucking mouth. “But it’s not your life, it’s one exam.” He knows it the second it comes out of his mouth. He doesn’t even have to see your eyes narrow, mouth dropping open as you fully absorb what he just said.

It’s not even like he had just threatened to kill a kitten or commit a murder, but with your reaction, he might as well have just said something equally as outlandish.

“One exam, just one fucking exam huh! Yeah Finn, it’s one exam that is worth forty percent of my grade. You’ve made it very clear that I have made it very clear that this is not just an exam, this is the exam. And sure, maybe I say that about every exam, but that’s only because every single fucking exam I take matters. Every single test or quiz or homework assignment I have done here matters, because if I do not work as hard as I possibly can, then I will have nothing.”

Finn was used to your anger. You got angry at him all the time. What Finn was not used to, was the tears that were currently welling in your eyes.

“I can’t fail this exam Finn! Because if I fail this exam, then it means I failed. And not just figuratively, literally. The last time I failed a test was in eighth grade. Do you know what my parents said to me Finn. Why didn’t you study harder, this was an easy test. What are you going to do better next time. The only reason I failed that exam is because I had another one that morning that I pulled an all nighter studying for. But they were so disappointed in me, and I hated it. Because it didn’t matter that I had not only passed the other exam with an A, but that I was the only student who had passed that exam at all.”

You took another ragged breath, the tears now falling freely as you kept ranting.

“And it’s not just academics, I make one misstep, make one bad decision, and it seems like everyone see’s it, and it never seems to go away.”

You trail off, not even realizing that you are literally swaying side to side. Tenatively, Finn steps to your side, sitting down next to you, and then you are collapsing into him, openly sobbing into his chest.

“You think I want to be like this. I am so, so fucking tired Finn. I’m tired of it all, and I just want… I just want…”

Finn moves then, reaching for you and hauling you onto his lap, hugging you into his chest, running his hand up and down your back. Your crying so hard that you can barely breathe, hardly registering the comfort that Finn is trying to give you.

“Hey, it’s okay!” He tries again.

“Fuck you Finn!” You scream at him, trying to push out of his lap.

“Honey, when was the last time you slept?” And he honestly doesn’t know if you’re ignoring him or if you can’t hear him over the sound of your sobs. One of his hands slides into your hair, gently undoing the ponytail and raking his fingers through it, pausing only to lightly scratch at your scalp.

He doesn’t know how long he sits there, rocking you back and forth, one hand skimming up and down your back, the other tangled in your hair, but eventually, you calm down, the sobs turning into sniffles.

“Baby?”

At this, you tense. That was new. He had never called you that. Gently, he untangles his fingers from your hair, sliding it across your cheek to tilt your chin to meet his gaze.

“Hey, you are not a disappointment.” He barely gets the sentence out before your moving to try and tuck your head back into his chest, but he won’t let you.

“You’re the smartest person I know, which, I mean, we go to STU, so…” And with that, you are no longer trying to burrow into him, but trying to push him away.

“Ok, bad time for a joke. I get it now. But I’m being serious honey. You are so goddamned smart,” He plants a kiss on your forehead. “And funny!” Another kiss, but on your cheek. “And strong!” He switches cheeks, before moving down to your jaw. “And so goddamned sexy!” He tilts your head again.

“And you are going to go so, so far in life, because you are smart and driven and everything anyone could ever hope to be. But you cannot study any more tonight. It’s…” He pauses, glancing at the clock on the wall, “3:27 in the morning, and you need sleep. You were literally swaying like a scarf in the wind a few minutes ago. And before you yell at me again, if you go to sleep now, I’ll help you study in the morning. And before you yell at me for that, no, not the way I helped you study last weekend, although I will go to my grave swearing that it’s the best way to study!”

And now you were giggling, the tears still shiny on your cheeks as he reached up to wipe them away. Your eyes flutter closed, leaning into his hand on your face.

“So what do you say honey? Bed time?”

You crack your eyes open to find him staring at you with a soft expression that you are to tired to decipher at the moment.

“Yeah Finny, bed time.”

Notes: This is extremely self indulgent, and was written during a breakdown after I realized exactly how much I have to do before sunday night. So of course, instead of actually doing the work, I wrote this.

Tagging my fellow Finn lovers

@sebsxphia @lorecraft @topguncortez @veritable-trash @callsignspark @callsignvalley

Also, I have the first few parts of a new Finn series almost up and ready to go! The first part should be up Friday!

[faofinn]

Day 20 - Breakdown

Part 1 | Part 2

@mediwhumpmay

Steve finally appeared in the basement, frowning at the sight. “Finn? What’s going on?”

The drugs had given Fao a split second of relief before the pounding of his heart was back. He whimpered, feeling again on the verge passing out, darkness tinging his vision. 

"I can't do this. He needs cardioverting. You're gonna have to do it."

“Hang on, slow down. Talk me through what’s going on.” He said, moving to check the monitoring. 

"Just look at it." Finn grumbled. "I've sedated a bit, given some pain relief, but you need to do it."

“Have you given adenosine?” Steve asked, keen to coach Finn through it rather than just completely take over.

"I've only done dc cardioversion before. There's so many risks with adenosine…" He looked to Steve, so overwhelmed.

“Okay, but it’s risk management, yeah?”

"It's Fao, Steve. I can't do this."

“Of course you can.” Steve told him. 

"Steve, I can't."

“Yes you can. Come on, we’ll do it together.”

"Please."

“Take a moment, go and sort the drugs out.”

He gave a heavy breath. "Okay. Are…are we doing adenosine?"

“Yeah, we’re going to need to.”

"I can sort it."

“Thank you, Finn.”

"Is he gonna be okay?"

“Of course he is.” Steve busied himself doing his own checks whilst Finn sorted the meds. Fao was still struggling, in and out a little not just because of the sedation. It was hard to concentrate on anything, as much as he tried to listen to what they were saying. He couldn’t remember Steve arriving. Had he been there the whole time?

"I've got the adenosine."

“Perfect. Do you know what you’re doing with it?”

"Giving it to you." He tried.

“Or you could just give it.” 

"Steve."

“Come on, give it. You know what you’re doing, we don’t have time to waste.”

He did as he was told, his hands shaking and his own chest tight. Resentment only grew as Steve continued to push him, unable to separate work from family. 

“Good. Now we just have to watch and wait, keep an eye on that monitoring.” 

The sedation Finn gave had been enough to keep Fao hazy, but not completely out of it. As the drugs went in he whined, feeling the effect of it. It was awful, the overwhelming sense that he was going to die. It felt like he was dying too, as it suddenly became more difficult to breathe. 

"You're okay, you're okay." Finn moved to hold Fao's hand, stroking through his hair. "It won't take long."

He gripped Finn’s hand, panic in his eyes. It felt wrong.

"It's gonna make you feel shit for a bit. You're okay."

He wasn’t okay, he was the opposite of okay, and nobody was helping. He struggled against the blackness at the edge of his vision, terrified if he gave into it he wasn’t going to wake up again. 

Finn’s eyes didn't move from the monitors, watching the rhythms carefully. There was a pause, snd Finn’s own heart almost stopped. Sure enough though, it kicked back in, and straight back into the tachycardia.

Steve swore from the end of the bed. "Finn, we need another dose."

Once the feeling like he was going to die had passed, there was a moment where things eased for Fao and he felt like he could breathe. But nearly as soon as it had happened, it was gone, and he groaned, gripping Finn’s hand desperately. 

"We need to go elsewhere." Finn's voice wavered. "They can do more."

Steve shook his head. “We don’t have time, Finn, and we’ve done too much already.”

"Then you do something! It's not working!"

“Finn, breathe.”

"I'm trying but nothing is working and you're not helping!"

“We just have to follow the protocol, another dose and see how that goes.” Steve told him gently. “This is all they’d do in ED.”

[maccreadysbaby]

i just binged the logan fam au pls im so invested 😩 there’s not a lot of works with logan and i’m so so happy i found it !! it’s so amazing and i love how you write ❤️

Thank you so much this makes me so happy! Unfortunately this is going to be the last part. I think fifteen is a good number to end on. Also this goes into the futures of Logan and y/n’s kids as well!!!

< prev part

HERES TO THE FUTURE™︎

y/n was absolutely livid Logan wouldn’t let her go to Houston with him

Elliot and McKade were absolutely livid Logan wouldn’t let them go to Houston with him

Y/n never got many descriptions of that night. Only that Finn’s first ever mission was saving his brother

y/n stayed at home with McKade, Elliot, Jade, and Sadie. They stayed up nearly all night waiting for any kind of communication

there was nothing until, three days later, Logan got home with Diego

and he still wouldn’t tell y/n what happened. Not that Finn had a nervous breakdown in the middle of the mission and that Gaz practically had to carry him. Not that Keegan and Hesh both got shot multiple times for Diego. Not that Rorke had the barrel of a gun pressed against their son’s head. Not that Rorke’s brains were splattered on the wall from a bullet that came out of Logan’s gun. Not that Diego had watched him kill Rorke. Not that Diego cling to Finn the entire way home, that he wouldn’t look at Logan, wouldn’t even get close enough for Logan to touch him

Diego was different when he got home. Traumatized, almost. He didn’t cry, didn’t have much of a reaction at all other than the fact that he wanted to sit on the couch with his whole family and not move

Sadie tried to get him to say something, but he didnt

And the eight of them, including Finn who’d returned home, sat there with him

They all fell asleep in the living room, in the floor, on the couches, in chairs

And the next morning, Sunday morning, they woke up to more silence from Diego

deep down Logan knew he’d scarred the kid for life, but what was he supposed to do? Let Rorke shoot him?

everyone was so gentle with Diego. They handled him like glass. Like porcelain. It broke y/n and Logan’s heart that, after they got home, when Logan moved toward Diego, Diego would back away

he slowly started talking again, but not to Logan. He started smiling again, but not at what Logan said. He started to laugh at jokes, and play games, and go back to normal

all except for the fact that he was avoiding Logan

it was absolutely heart shattering for Y/n and Logan, but what could they do? Forcing him to interact could cause more harm than good, and they weren’t therapists, they didn’t know how to handle this

it was one Wednesday, after Diego had gotten home from school. Y/n was in the kitchen and Logan was working at the dining table. McKade and Elliot were in their rooms, Sadie was playing with Jade in the living room, Finn was on-base with TF141

Diego got home from school and dropped his bag. Sadie greeted him but he didn’t say anything

he bee-lined through the living room, through the kitchen. Upon his arrival, Logan stood, ready to give him his space, but instead, Diego walked straight into him, wrapping his arms around his father so tight he nearly couldn’t breathe

“I’m sorry. I love you, dad,” was all Diego said

Logan made eye constant with y/n and hugged Diego back. “I love you too, buddy”

and then, just then, their family clicked back into place. Everything shifted, everything felt, right. y/n felt, for the first time, that their future wasn’t so uncertain, that their family wasn’t so strange, that everything might just be okay from that point forward

and it was

McKade made it through medical school and became a children’s doctor, working mostly with kids that had to board at the hospital for hereditary diseases or cancer

he wasn’t one for romance. Not until one day, when he was twenty-eight, when a woman and her one-year-old son who’d just beaten cancer got transferred into his care

her name was June, and her son, Julian

he tried not to fall for her because doctor and parent was so taboo, so unnatural, so forbidden, but he couldn’t help it

after they got released, he started hanging out with her, spending time with them, and oh God, he loved them

and he married her when he was twenty-nine. They had three kids, including Julian. One was born when Julian was three, a daughter, Bailey, and then another daughter a year after that, Evie

Elliot ended up with the most oddball job out of them all. He became an underwater welder

sounds strange, but they get paid extremely extremely well

he opened up his home to house foreign exchange students when he was twenty-nine and eventually takes up fostering as a single father

he only fostered one child, a ten year old boy named Ezra, and he fell so in love that he adopted him

he never got married, he didn’t have much interest in women after what his mother did to Logan. he had a few girlfriends but Ezra was his main priority all of the time

he and Ezra had a father/son only life like he and Logan did for a bit, but it was happy as opposed to the messy divorce that caused theirs

Finn spent almost fifteen years in the military before finally settling down after losing his second leg when he was 35

he took up working business deals, being a salesman, so he got a remote job leading a team of salesman under a company that supplied car dealerships with advertising and such

he’d pretty much written off getting married until he met Alluria (uh-lore-ee-uh), a beautiful girl from Slovakia that had moved to America as a baby. He met her because she worked at the local coffee shop he spent, like, half of his life in

they got married when Finn was 36 and never had any kids, but they have a beautiful marriage and live to spend time with their nieces and nephews

Diego graduated high school and college at the top of his class, but settled on the culinary arts

he started working as a cook in someone else’s kitchen

then a manager / cook

and it spiraled and spiraled until, suddenly, y/n and Logan were watching on as he opened his own Brazilian restaraunt

he met a girl, Lacey, when she applied to work there and long story short they ended up married when Diego was 22

they had five kids. The first was a boy, Noah, when he was 23, then a girl a year later, Haven, two years after that a boy, Dallas, then a year later, female identical twins, Callie and Emma

Sadie decided not to go to college, and instead, lives, at first, by picking up odd jobs. She’d auditioned for shows and movies but never made it

She finally settled down and ended up being a freelance photographer

She married a guy named Hudson after meeting him in a theater course she took once

they had one kid, a girl, and they named her Y/n

Jade grew up with so much love and support she didn’t know what to do with it all. She played sports throughout all of her school years, but she finally settled on being a soccer player

she played through college, where she met Avery, a boy that also played soccer

and eventually they got married. Jade was 24

they had two babies, both boys, named Roman and Leo. Leo was born when she was 25, Roman when she was 26

and Y/n, Logan, and their massive family lived happily ever after

(Oh yeah; and every single one of their kids made sure to have pancake Saturdays with their own kids)

[littlemoneytoes]

Has Foxy or Bonie ever had a breakdown? If so, how did everyone react?

yes they have Goldie and Freddy: try to calm down their lovers and let them cry it all out ( it would be the first time Foxy ever has a break down) Chica and Dottie: give them breathing space and listen to them talk and give some comfort snacks and drinks toy Freddy and Finn: will do their best or end up having a break down with Foxy or Bonnie or both Mangle and T.C: will do what they can to help them calm down Mari and ( I forgot B.B silly me): will give them comfort and let them talk it out and spend time at the prize corner or in mari's box toy Bonnie: just try his best to not say lame Shadow Freddy: wouldn't care and just straight up ignore them ( unless it's Pete) Pete: will try his best and just either pet or brushed their fur to soothe them ( this works with his siblings but mostly on Finn) Mike and Henry: will hug and cradle them for comfort and let them cry it all out Welp that is all thank you all for the questions :D

[ghost-town-story]

Hello and happy STS! :D This would be especially hilarious for The Astral Chronicles, but feel free to choose which WIP you inflict this question onto. ;) If your main characters were sucked into our world, The Devil Is a Part-Timer-style (i.e., dropped into our world without the resources/status they had in theirs, transformed into basically human with no powers, and the only thing they've got are the clothes on their back and their memories), how well would they fare? What would they do to survive, who's failing at adapting and how, and most importantly, who is working at McDonald's?

Oh my god this question is great

The funny thing about this for Astral is that I actually have a half-canon storyline where this actually happens. And considering Aiden is from our world, the answer ends up being "find Aiden and enlist his help in getting back to Astral"

If they're tossed into our world with no way of getting back tho, hmm... Rose would be doing her best to adapt, but also be having several breakdowns of "oh god I left my brother behind D:". Jared would absolutely get fired from most minimum wage jobs because he has a problem with authority, but he also has the energy of "will scavenge garbage cans if that's what it takes."

Will and Finn would be the ones to end up working at a McDonald's, as an "ok, this is what we have to do to survive I guess." There would definitely be a lot of I'm so done with this shit looks happening between them though. Customer service yo *jazz hands*

I also thought of Space Pirates for this question, because there's a lot more differences between that world and ours and it's very entertaining, so here goes:

Reizora, Artemis, and Deva adapt the best. Reizora spends the first hour or so straight up crying because Artemis has her body back, then she kicks Artemis onto bed rest and starts figuring out how the hell to make sure she and her crew survive this new world.

The answer is basically the same way they survived their world: Robin-Hood-type piracy XD They'd end up with a reputation for fucking with corporations and helping out the local community of wherever they end up.

Artemis would accept the bed rest mandate for maybe a week before she gets tired of Reizora's overprotectiveness and insists on joining the shenanigans. There are things she misses about her old world, but she can't deny she likes having a body again and seeing that associated guilt lifted from Reizora.

Syl (the Medic, alien with many tentacles) and the Engineer (unnamed so far, round and fluffy with many arms) are both annoyed with their lack of appendages. The Engineer will use her mouth and feet to hold things instead.

Aeryz has the hardest time adapting. She has a hard time adjusting to the fact she can't shapeshift anymore, she hates not being amongst the stars, and depending on where they all end up, she might not even be able to see them. She really just wants to go home :(

As for the Imperial kids, I think it would be really funny for Caelan and Rossano to be working at McDonald's in this scenario. I just have this image of Rossano as a wannabe influencer who's always like "I'm gonna quit the second I get enough followers, just you wait." Meanwhile Caelan is just like "ya know what? This is 10 million times less stressful than the rest of my life has been. I'm content staying here forever."

[robronrewatch2023]

June 8th summary

We watched from 2014/12/01 to 2014/12/16.

Someone has a prang with Moira and she has to go to hospital. The guy brings his car to the garage, asking Aaron to sort it, but then it goes missing. Aaron thinks Ross might have taken it, but he denies it. Cain puts the fear of god into the guy for hurting Moira.

Chrissie asks Aaron to find a flashy classic car for Robert. Robert blows hot and cold with Aaron before faking a car breakdown and kissing him. He backs off quickly but later finds Aaron at the garage and they have sex. Despite this, Robert claims he is straight and says that Chrissie doesn't need to know everything about him. Aaron invites Finn for a drink but spends the whole time staring at Robert before telling Robert that he has bashed his car up. Robert goes out to look at it before coming back to confront Aaron; they get angry and physical before kissing and going upstairs to have sex again.

Diane gives Jack's wedding ring to Andy, which Robert is upset and hurt by. He goes for a sulky walk when Aaron picks him up and they end up in Bar West where Robert is freaked out to be there and seethes silently for 45 minutes before ranting about the rings; Aaron thinks he's overreacting. They have a bit of an argument then Robert storms out. After Katie has a go at him too, Robert phones the jewellers, asking if they can do inscriptions inside the rings.

Adam gets out of prison and is adorable with Aaron (I friendship them a lot). Chrissie recognises Ross's voice as being one of the people in the fake burglary; Robert manages to stop her phoning the police by saying he'll go and talk to Ross, then pretending he beat him up enough to get in trouble himself if Chrissie phones the police now.

[nightguide]

get new friends

don't bring your exes back.

walked through hell - Anson Seabra

his dickography

'what if' is now plural followed by the leader crawling up to the yummy pink sweet thing on the right, like Finn has no neck (case of situation)

Ned (Pushing Daisies) infamously carries a sweet legacy, so the piemaker has a crippling sensation for Harlem Lima (now Chuck) who made it all up (Doctor Who) that made no sense to River Song til now, like she does not care anymore hence Tree Trunks is the only mammal in the Candy Kingdom served the Queen Bubblegum become River Song's legacy to the Marvel universe (yes, it's gone global but dare i mention the blind lawyer and y'all flip your minds). Tree Trunks is Ned who went on a cryo-sleep via his own powers to meet River Song in 'another life' (he's an experimentalist in his own universe connected to PB via Olive Snook)

Jesse St. James before he became Rogue (like he has an arc of his own on Hocus Pocus but that was time where Pushing Daisies has an ulterior effect on what sarcastic kids can do if they grew up and trust me, i loved CN more than anybody to be a heartbreaker rn like that is easily said and done if you seen my face at some point in time like you knew me x2)

damn, Candy Kingdom is made out of River's true personality that even celebrities are in on this which is why River shows up like a ghost in between the party, like fuuuuuuuuccckkkkkkk. Keanu Reeves

screenshotting a pfp nowadays is what is called a cartoon reflex so is an autistic person's narrative inside their head the entire time if 'talk or you're dead' and you're making sure intuition travels faster than the speed of light that even common sense is now awarded to someone who dares to think straight, like that is a narrow minded altruistic thinker in a cartoon in his own world asking about a death of a Creme Puff for a thought he can never have so that was Princess Bubblegum he tried to 'slay' but he never had it so a zombie apocalypse happened in an intuitive breakdown happened twice and who actually won it? so applied my cartoon physics, the bright colours display what the autistic bunch don't have (their happiness) so eating cartoon (the candy kingdom) is them eating it by roasting the VA for Finn for delaying his personal promise to Princess Bubblegum as much as Ice King carrying it on, so Finn delayed everybody elses dreams except his own toxic masculinity cuz he dreamed poorly and let everybody down that even PW hated being on the show himself (hence why he voiced LSP) who is actually true to his character much like his life being swapped for the GoT and HotD being the same direction as Daemon Targaryen (Finn in real life) ending a situation if he never had the chance, so for the first time, Shada actually made it up and let the creators (CN public) write on his honour of being a people pleaser (rule of the influencer via wealth which is why creators were let down in CN to make valid toons made for the human mind than heart for being (evidence) than making a throne for death on the mind (actually serving a mental God (Keanu Reeves) than taking the shahada for the first time than seeing everybody else get happier with a thought than a feeling (why i roast Selena Gomez too hardly is that she cannot even sing yet provides shitty reasons to exist than reason her acting pointless (AT drama of the same asexual relationship for the same person who denied them the first time with reason with everybody liking 'the hero' for squat. they don't exist and they are shitty people in real life, get new friends or dump ur ex-narc on ur mobile rn

the guy next to the boombox is Keanu Reeves, music is considered unholy in the CK til Reeves wanted to hear it for himself, which is why everybody is surprised all of a sudden and Finn denied it, so ultimately, his thought-radius on the Matrix was all just an Adventure Time fan-fic

0010100101010101010010101001010101010

8181881818181818181818811818188181818181818181881811818181881

he does not get it the first time hence his denial and hence my blog cuz i know he's intuitively reading it rn

my juicy ass and yours. Nbe

do you know how tarot is made? yeah, you seen yourself get beaten up for a reason (hence why Spanish lore has it if created then offer it to children and not to old men because they will find conversation in anything that it is so hard to ignore a laughing saviour at the end) so question why everything is created before meeting your curse

'find out about what Finn'

and you knew why

why the eyes have alternate smiley faces on a alpaca pinata is why you're blind to belief, so you did it now, Finn and now you're alienated for the same reason why you met the devil in tissue paper (like you did not need to harm the unreasonable world of creation before realising that world is physically real) like there is no real realisation in why hearts break after thinking about the world in believing you're the same in wonder or thought so that was personal on everybody else after the voice actor leaves the booth, there is no 'OK boomer' in everything if you think your demons leave it better than you or than for the society you really wish to eat, so stop harassing the situation on the no and let go

dead candy is a date fruit

the answer is a masturbation technique, so he has to think before he acts before breaking a simple question made up to give a clue to the viewer so a spanish lead (Selena Gomez) could actually raise the bar by being pretentious about the same thing (my Dad likes a mathematician) which is how answers are found intuitively for Shada to give a shit (actually broke the Muslim royal code of honour in real life, womp womp) broken by a spanish musician speaking english he never asked for (his type) so why?

Justin Bieber is a better mathematics guy than any celebrity can be (his hidden talent) says his Mom, royally

write your angel numbers backwards, you're onto something

Pendleton Ward has his name on the Nobel Prize for nuclear physics on alternate travel elsewhere (teleportation techniques not even assholes (witches of horror for the faint hearts) can access) so Selena, 🖕

lies are accessed without Selena's proven type (someone who can actually tell her off for existing and it works) so she needed a math brat with no heart to reject ill pain by abusing the poor to get nothing back because it was somebody else's work (they created the world she lived in before getting kicked out) so Selena lived in OOO royally before pissing off Princess Bubblegum off since men cannot die living the same way before orgasming off to a lady (men can never be a cat but women always are) like dogs men are to the bone which is how Islam forbids her to break Gomez's plans off in a family circuit of all (her family lives in OOO for free since she wanders off in her own shit show scenario in theory, so i got Shada back on Earth for Gomez doing it to Bieber twice (internet feud with Hayley) and had her teleported to OOO for... free, resident body hosted is how video games meta-universe can relax now (Wreck-It Ralph knew too much about her hate mail that they made it up to create the hero working day and night for everything she never had (one woman knowing for all humanity)

that's Shada's realisation (second time) orgasm. men can't. literally never since bubblegum guards throwing flames was purely immaterial for sugar to melt caramel so decently that even powder physics lie for shellac to burst into flames (chinese animators doing it for the sake of science which is how Shada let Muslim women grow up for the girl of his dreams making sense of animation physics bio-metrically for other scientists to believe in me (parent fashion following)

'4444' before realising an answer back to black is hyper-dynamo to create 'talking is real' without fear taking you over, so you doing science with PB is animated layout to peaceful adventuring alone with friends you made up along the way (objects in canon expression denotes similarity to your life as omnipotent elsewhere)

she abused magic, so add another 4 followed by written 4 on the chalkboard to create the decorpsinator serum, so always add the users 4 to imitate life as beauty upon peace so it's 4444444 (7 numbers per angel number is cartoon network, so you're always alive inside and out for a spanish demon to be locked in, hence why the end times signs were too much on the autistic bunch- Neurodivergents are live now since they were the dead angels talking)

her answer is 4.18 (new circumference on the circle adding inches on the clock according to the round table physics via Lancelot)

focus on the bee and not the butterfly if Pendleton Ward wants you to figure out his grandmaster equation (the Queen's Gambit) is how you outrank him on world championships on the intel-psylocke X-Men radius he calls Rogue.

you found the guy who has been shortcutting your TV license joke from Lee Evans in your algorithm by now for the last fck to give in the UK, now residentially evicted

i dont see Britney Spears making a London residence than seeing your tonal outbreak happening in your occultist practices in your seance concerts you now call Sea-bra for Seanc-bra

go figure your cringe elsewhere

[hawkinsp0st]

💛🖤❤️🖤❤️🖤❤️💛

so this post is stuck in my mind and somehow spurred a hellfire club mike wheeler/cali mike wheeler breakdown! i’m really excited to talk about this one bc it appears so intentional! and i get to combine 2 of my truest loves: costume design and gay ppl.

let’s discuss.

🖤🖤🖤🖤🖤🖤🖤🖤🖤

from 4x4 thru 4x8, i think we’re lowkey seeing… single mike, right? like, he thinks him and el are basically done? so during this post, keep that thought in ur back pocket like eddie’s black handkerchief <3

~~~🌵❤️‍🔥🌙~~~

something i find striking about the burying the body/top of car desert scenes, during this period of “yeah me and el are prob broken up,” is that mike is back in his hellfire color scheme—he’s wearing black&white, with red, orange, gold and metallic tones everywhere.

there’s no red/gold/metallic tones on mike (except his silver belt!!), but it’s everywhere behind mike & will, especially as they dig the grave. the shovels they’re holding have metal handles; the rusting cars behind both mike and will during their staring shots are red & orange; the desert sand/hills behind mike are red-orange; will’s color palette for his cali crew outfit is yellow/gold; i even noticed on first watch that byler’s cheeks/lips are super flushed during that triple take moment.

tldr; key byler scene where they stare at each other for several shots, and they also open up to each other. hellfire mike color palette everywhere, and it’s the only time in the show we see mike associated w these colors except for 4x1 and 4x8. coincidence? no way.

~~~🏴‍☠️🕷📓~~~

let’s take a trip to 4x1. hellfire mike, my beloved.

i love hellfire mike bc he was so Himself. i don’t even think that version of mike, even tho it was only a day apart, would’ve snapped at will in rink o mania. it’s literally just when mike is trying to force himself into his cookie cutter straight relationship, wearing pastels and shit, that he gets frustrated. “shitty knockoff” mike wheeler, not his authentic self.

i could talk about eddie and hellfire’s impact on mike all day. it’s not explored through substantial screentime the way dustin’s bond with eddie is, bc it’s a different bond, but visually it’s clear the connection they wanted us to make—mike is evolving into a mini eddie.

from a costume/hair/makeup design perspective, there’s certainly a reason joe quinn has long, dark hair and a pale, fresh face in the cafeteria scene just like finn, and that same black&white color scheme as mike does w the hellfire shirt (just w a jean jacket over top and jewelry on, the only major differences—mike doesn’t have all the embellishments yet bc he’s just coming into himself—still getting used to not wearing “whatever his mommy bought him from the goddamn gap”. i find it interesting that clothing specifically is brought up in this scene; they want us to notice).

and then that night at the hellfire game, eddie doesn’t have his jacket anymore, so he and mike have essentially the same exact visual, w the exception of eddie’s tattoos, rings, and other jewelry (long dark hair, bangs, hellfire shirt. it’s giving clones). eddie even wears a black watch :-) basically, they are trying to show us that aesthetically, mike is growing into eddie but isn’t quite there yet, isn’t quite as unhinged and bold.

this visual parallel contrasts dustin’s bond w eddie; dustin wears that colorful/bright white shirt over his hellfire tshirt, blocking out most of the black sleeves, and they put him in his blue and white “thinking cap” hat rather than a black or red one. this is bc dustin’s bond w eddie is more emotional and bright, while mike is inspired by eddie’s darker look and vibe in an aesthetic and personality sense, and i think we’re supposed to notice that because their looks are designed so similarly.

like, they could’ve put joe quinn in any wig to be eddie, but they gave him one that reminds us of mike wheeler. i’m pretty sure they even straightened finn’s hair this season, which they weren’t doing as much previously (remember how fluffy it was in s3). i mean, look at this pic. this is the exact same queer mf and their token straight best friend.

~💥🍒🎸~

mike under the influence of eddie/hellfire is his truest form and you can’t convince me otherwise:

he takes risks. he doesn’t listen to his parents, doesn’t care if he stays out too late playing hellfire (it’s giving bathroom stall graffiti mike wheeler from s2). he goes around school and asks everyone & their mother to play hellfire, barging into science labs and wrestling team practice and the school newspaper. he puts himself out there, passionately, talking with his hands about the game he loves, which he didn’t even want to play last season when el was around—growth and a return to his more authentic self thanks to hellfire.

he talks about “bullshit media propaganda,” which is something we just watched him learn from eddie in the cafeteria scene. he’s vibing hard with eddie’s values. this is not the mike wheeler we see arriving in california or snapping at will in rink o mania, but it is the one we get a glimpse of again in the desert.

🖤♥️⭐️ hellfire mike = hawkins/dnd dungeon master mike vibes. the mike that will fell in love with. ⭐️♥️🖤

mike + will + hawkins/dnd = mike’s happy place—“it’s not the same without you.”

~♟♣️📞~

back in the desert in 4x5, the use of this color palette shows us that mike feels at home and like himself again, because he’s with will. the longer he’s away from el, the more he’s shedding this artificial skin…

…until will mentions “what if they don’t like the truth.” that resonates with mike and he gets scared of what that means. he retreats. he covers back up, goes back to wearing Ted Wheeler Turquoise™️

but we almost reached something there, in the above pic. (i also like the green plants & 7up can—green = byler reconciliation in sight 🌿)

~🚨🪓🩸~

the next time we see red associated w mike wheeler, it’s the painting scene.

and of course the bright red resonates with him. of course his smile can light up a room in this moment, of course he finds it stunning—this is who he is. the dragon is bright red. the shadows and outlines are black. the crown on the shield is gold. and the weapons are metallic…

💔▪️👑 hellfire colors. 👑 ▪️💔

this visual thread suggests that mike feels truly like himself, and truly at home, when he sees will’s stunning canvas. (god i feel like i got punched in the throat, that’s so fucking beautiful.)

not to mention we’ve got tons of green in there for the forest background, which we can think of as not only a byler reconciliation symbol, but also the forest is a major symbol of hawkins—where will was kidnapped, where el was hiding out, where we see eddie and jason run to when they’re in distress. so this forest imagery calls back to hawkins mike, dnd dungeon master mike, looking for will in the woods mike, “it’s not the same without you” mike.

💛🖤❤️🖤❤️🖤❤️💛

in conclusion: s4 uses the hellfire club color palette—black, white, red, gold/flame orange/yellow, & metallic—to show us that mike looks up to eddie munson and is starting to form independent, subversive ideas—“bullshit media propaganda.”

🍭🧢🚙🍬 = ❌❌❌👎👎👎

it also shows us (via mike’s cali outfit and the bright, candy colored rink o mania setting) that this self actualization of mike’s only regresses when he tries to be el’s boyfriend.

🌲🌲🌲🏡👾 = 🎱🖤🏴‍☠️‼️💌🐝🌼☀️

mike’s only place he feels he can be himself is playing dnd, in hawkins, with will—but based on what we saw in the s3 fight, there’s some elusive reason mike doesn’t let himself have all 3 at the same time. he clings to his relationship with el, but it only holds him back.

and based on the desert scene, the with will aspect is the most important part. the callback to the hellfire color palette in the desert w/ will & in the painting scene shows us that mike can feel at home anywhere in the world with will—hence the soft looks in the van scene, hence thanks, i needed that.

🖤🖤🖤🖤🖤🖤🖤🖤

[just-a-bit-of-a-nerd]

The thought of losing you

Request from @realjennyshelby :45 & 59 Poe Dameron. I need the hurt/comfort of it all :>

45:They watch you get tortured

59:You lose your baby

Author’s note: Damn girl are you trying to make Poe fans cry?? This is def an angst.

Warnings: Torture, death, cursing, some blood, and a future breakdown for anyone who reads this :)

Summary: Poe broke a promise that he needed to keep. So he makes a new one, and if he breaks this one...

Here he was...Poe Dameron, the best pilot in the Resistance, the most cool and collected person that you know, your husband, the person who was supposed to be the father of your unborn child. A sobbing mess in front of you while you screamed from the overwhelming pain you felt throughout your entire being.

It’s been a really bad day.

It started off normal. You and Poe were as happy as ever. Just 2 weeks before this you told Poe the great news that you were pregnant. The joy on that mans face when he found out was contagious. He spend those whole 2 amazing weeks of happiness bragging about how his amazing wife was going to bring life into the world. He told everyone at least 3 times that you were carrying his future boy or girl. The excitement in his eyes when he told Finn that as soon as he or she could walk he’d take them straight to his x-wing and teach them how to be a better flyer than he is. 

“Ya know, once the war is over, the General is gonna wish they had someone like my future kid to fly their planes,” he’d brag to anyone who had the attention spam to listen.

Both of you were a little worried about having a kid in the middle of the war but Poe assured you that he’d keep you and his little pilot save from anything that would want to harm the two of you.

Boy was he wrong.

The General had one small mission for you. Even though you were pregnant you could still do small missions to do your part, you where only 2 weeks along. And although Poe didn’t like the fact that you had to go to this one  you told him that you were only going to pick up some supplies for the Resistance. That it was only a one day trip. That you’d be home and just fine before he even knows you were gone.

Boy were you wrong.

The mission went smoothly the whole time you were collecting everything that you needed. It was the trip back that took a turn. 

Some how the dark side tracked you down. How you still have no clue. Took you and everyone your traveled with hostage. Thankfully one made it out. Some pilot who’s name you never cared to learn but you will once you get home. If you get home. She informed the General who then informed Poe. 

“Hey buddy the general wants to see you now, she says it’s important,” Finn told Poe as he was cleaning his x-wing.

“What is it?” He questioned a hint of worry flowed into his tone of voice. His mind went straight to you thinking the worst, and he wasn’t really wrong, “Is it Y/N? Is everything okay?”

Finn shook his head, “I don’t know man but she sounded...scared, I’ve never heard her use that tone of voice.”

If anyone thought Poe was panicking before, he definitely was now. He ran with Finn to find the General with worry spread all over her face.

“Poe...” she hesitated, at that point he knew it was about you. And whatever it was with you it was bad. Finn was right, he’s never heard this much worry in the Generals voice. “I’m so sorry, but somethings happened to Y/N and her team,” she said, witch broke Poe into a million pieces. Just knowing that the love of his life, the woman carrying his child, the person who he intended to spend the rest of his life with was in danger. Witch brought the thought of, ‘will I get to spend the rest of my life with her?’ 

“What’s happened?” He questioned, tears forming in his eyes getting ready to fall. And he hasn’t even heard the worst of it yet.

“Her and her team somehow flew right into a trap,” she started, “The dark side must’ve found out where they were heading and kidnapped all of them but one pilot. We’re lucky she made it here or we’d have no idea that all this had happened,” she explained to Poe. They worry never leaving her tone or face and making Poe’s worry bigger, “We are creating a rescue team as we speak to go get them. And I don’t think I’d even have to ask for you to lead it,” she finished.

Poe’s heart was racing. The things that he thought were happening to you were far from pleasant, “You bet your ass, when do we leave?” He questioned with determination in his face and tone. 

“No later than 10 minutes,” she reported, “be ready to leave.”

And as that left her mouth, Poe left Finn’s side as he made he way to his x-wing to prepare. He kept telling himself that you were okay. That the baby was okay. That you both would make it home save and sound. And at the end of the day he’d cry in your arms and fall asleep with you by his side. 

Poe was the first ready to leave and as he waited he thought of ways he could get you out of there without hurting anyone besides the bad guys. Witch he was very open to that thought. He wanted to be the one to save you, to take you in his arms and carry you to his ship. To hold you while you told him what happened. He wanted to be the first to see if you were still alive. 

After a little while longer of waiting they were off. It was him, Rey, Finn, and about 30 other random people he didn’t care to list in his head at the moment. He trusted Finn almost as must as he trusted you. And he knew that Finn cared about you enough to give his life for you. Not that you or Poe would ever ask him to do that. And Rey, well the reasoning for Rey was self-explanatory. Her power of the force was a huge upper hand and Poe wanted as many of those as he could get. 

Poe and the team made their way to the base five of the team members shot at the ship for a diversion as the other 28 on them flew in. Him, Rey, and Finn got out of their ships grouping with the others. 

“Everyone here knows who their teaming up with and who their looking for. Remember, this is a rescue mission not an attack. Try to stay unseen and quite,” Poe ordered. He was in General mode. As he always was on missions but this one he multiplied it by 100, his desperation to find you as soon as possible was taking over him.

The team agreed and split into their groups, his team being with Rey and Finn of course. They were off looking for you. They quietly made their way through the hallways of the huge ship. Listing to anything that might give away where you are. After about five minutes later, finding nothing they ran into a group of storm troopers. They were all getting ready to attack when Rey spoke up.

“You will put your weapons down,” she ordered in a forceful tone.

“We will put our weapons down,” they repeated obediently placing their guns of the floor.

“One of you will tell us where you are keeping Y/N while the others stay still,” she ordered once more in that same forceful tone.

“One of us will tell you where we are keeping Y/N while the others stay still,” they all repeated while one walked forward.

“Keep down this hall and she will be on the second door to the left,” he informed us.

“Thank you,” Rey replied with a cocky smile on her face as the three passed the storm troopers. 

They quickly found your room and right on time, tons of machines came charging at them.

“Poe, go get Y/N me and Rey will handle this!” Finn shouted.

Poe didn’t need any further instructions. He shot the lock off the door and ran inside. Finding not only you, but also, Kylo Ren.

Poe was about to call for backup but Kylo reattached the door with his power of the force, “Shit,” Poe whispered under his breath.

“Funny,” Kylo started, “I was just about to come looking for you, you have some information I need.” Without warning Poe felt himself lose control of his body as he came to a complete still. He was moved closer to you, seeing the pain in your face, the blood that was coming out of your temple, his heart broke. 

“Now Poe I don’t think I’ll have to introduce you to my little guest here, I’m pretty sure you have a close relationship with her already,” Kylo started. Poe could hear the smile behind that mask.

“What do you want from me?” Poe asked, fighting the tears that threatened to fall down his cheeks.

“Oh you know, I only need the map to Skywalker,” he told him, smirking under his mask, “And I need you to tell me where that little droid is that has it.”

“Poe don’t tell him anything,” you  spoke up. It was a desperate plea. Somehow, someway Poe’s heart broke even more, the ace was becoming to much for him and he started shedding silent tears.

“Aww how cute, the wife begging her love to keep the secret that they spent so long protecting,” he laughed, “in exchange for her well being.”

“Well being?” Poe questioned, if Kylo was planning on hurting you to get him to talk then Poe knew he wouldn’t last long.

“Well,” Kylo started as he held his hand out facing you, “you tell me where the droid is,” and then it started. The first agonizing scream out of your mouth, and it broke Poe to hear it, “and I’ll make this stop,” Kylo finished.

“DON’T!” you screamed, “POE DON’T TELL HIM ANYTHING!” you cried again. 

“STOP!” Poe yelled over your cries, “PLEASE STOP IT NOW!” he begged.

“Only you can make this stop Dameron,” Kylo stated calmly.

“Why don’t you just look in my head?!” Poe questioned, unable to hold back the sobs.

Kylo laughed, “Oh Poe, because this is much more entertaining,” he simply stated.

Poe wouldn’t just sit here and let this happen, no matter haw much you begged. You are the love of his life, the carrier of this child- wait. His child, not only was this son of a bitch hurting you, he was hurting your baby, “Okay, okay!” Poe shouted, desperate to make him stop, “BB-8 is in the ship with six other team members,” Poe confessed, “Now leave her alone!” He begged.

Kylo let out an evil laugh, “Poe Dameron, did you really think I’d be that merciful?” He asked and laughed harder.

Damn. He was played. Kylo was never gonna stop this, he was going to make Poe watch him kill her and their child in front of him. 

“Please, please, please no!” Poe begged, Kylo laughed even more as your screams got louder, “PLEASE I’LL DO ANYTHING!” he yelled over your pain. More and more tears started to fall every second. Poe could see the life drain out of your eyes slowly, as he felt pain that he never thought he’d ever feel before.

Here he was...Poe Dameron, the best pilot in the Resistance, the most cool and collected person that you know, your husband, the person who was supposed to be the father of your unborn child. A sobbing mess in front of you while you screamed from the overwhelming pain you felt throughout your entire being. And there was nothing anyone could do.

Just as all hope seemed lost, he heard the door bust down behind him and he fell to the ground. 

“Let them go!” Rey yelled as she charged at Kylo she and he pulled out their light sabers and started fighting. The screaming stopped. You were quiet. Finn ran up to Poe to see if he was okay but Poe ignored him hand ran to you, taking off the restraints that held you back. You were barely breathing, but you were still breathing. That’s all he could ask for as of right now.

“Y/N? Y/N, honey please look at me please. Let me see your beautiful eyes please,” he begged you to wake up, to look at him. He needed you to more than you could ever begin to know.

“Hmmm,” you hummed as you slowly opened your eyes, “Poe baby...”

“Hi sweetheart, your okay your gonna be okay,” Poe promised.

“No Poe,” you sobbed, “No it’s not okay.”

“Yes, yes it is,” Poe tried to convince you but you just shook your head and started to sob even harder.

“Poe it’s the baby, we lost the baby,” you cried.

At that moment everything stopped. He hates to admit it but after what he saw, him just being grateful your alive he forgot all about the baby. But then he took your words in, no. No, no, no. There’s no way. You can’t lose the baby. You can’t. But you can, and you most likely did. He tried to shake that thought out of his head and tried reassure you and himself.

“No, no. Don’t say that the baby is fine,” he tried, but even he wouldn’t believe that. Not anymore.

“No Poe,” you sobbed, “I felt it, they’re gone,” you continued to sob.

And then something lined up in his mind, when your screams of pain suddenly got louder, it wasn’t just pain. You were mourning, looking back you could see it in your eyes. You knew they were gone as soon as they died.

At that, Poe couldn’t hold it back anymore. He started to sob harder than he has all day. Witch he didn’t think was possible but at this point, anything could be possible. 

As you two cried together Finn had to speak up, the fight between Rey and Kylo was getting heated and you needed to get BB-8 out of there,”Guy’s I’m so sorry but we need to leave,” Finn said with sorrow.

Even though Poe didn’t want to leave, he just wanted to sit there and cry in your arms, he knew they had to leave. Still crying, Poe picked you up and carried you bridal style out of the room and him and Finn ran to the ship while Rey held off Kylo. 

Once they made it to the main ship Poe lied you down on a bed then asked another pilot if he could fly his x-wing back home so he could stay with you. The pilot agreed.

A few minutes later Rey ran into the ship and then they were off. The whole ride Poe sat with you as you cried and mourned for the loss of your baby, other than that the ship was silent. No one dared to make a sound.

One they made it home Poe rushed you to the med-bay immediately, just to make sure that nothing else was wrong with you, and to confirm the baby’s death. As Poe waited for the doctors to come out and tell him if you were okay or not, he couldn’t help the useless hope that maybe, your baby was still alive, maybe they can save them.

But it was to late, that’s what Poe told himself, that’s what you told him, and eventually that’s what the doctors told him. As he walked up to your bed he couldn’t help the sobs as he saw your tired body that was once carrying life, now mourning over the child that you both loved but never got to meet. Life that he was so ready to bring in this word, life that he still wants in this world, but will never have.

You slid over and patted the side of the bed, calling him to sit next to you. He did. He laid next to you and held on to you tight. And than when you started sobbing he did to. He sobbed with you in that bed for hours, no one bothered you. Although Poe was devastated to hear and know that his baby boy or girl were not gonna be who he dreamed them to be, to know that their just not gonna be, he was happy he had you. You were the only thing keeping him alive now. You were the only one who felt what he was feeling. You were the only one who could really make him feel better about everything. And he made a promise to his baby, that he’d never let anything bad happen to them, and he broke it. He broke that promise before he could even meet them. And you were the only one who could heal that hole that it made in his heart. Because you would always be there no matter how bad he fucked up. So he made a new promise, but not to you or him. To his baby, his baby that was in a better place now, where ever that may be. He made a promise to him or her. That he would do everything he could to protect you, even if it made you hate him, even if he hated himself. You were going to live a long happy healthy life or his name wasn’t Poe Dameron. If he had to die right now just to make sure that happened then he would. And if he every broke that promise, he would. Somehow if that promise was broken he’d find a way to rid himself of the galaxy. 

Because you were his everything. And what could one do without their everything?

[enbymike]

going to be completely real for a second: the reason why i’m so confident in byler being canon is the absolute amount of hints and the trail leading up to the idea. it’s a combination of a lot, but specifically two major things: the will sexuality plotline in season 4 combined with the milvn relationship breakdown plotline to show how mike cannot admit he loves el, and the constant mentioning of byler by noah, finn and the marketing team (hello netflixgeeked??? it’s insane????)

i cannot say all this without acknowledging the very real elephant in the room – the possibility of queerbait. it’s been done before, and i’m a veteran to it. but this time around, it feels different.

i cant explain it, but a lot of shows and movies that utilise queerbait use it sparingly and subtlety, with things only lgbt people themselves would notice and pick up on, but easily flying under the radar of the cishets. To make it easy to gaslight queer people about it and claim they were just ‘seeing things’. but netflix, and stranger things as a whole, have NOT been doing that with byler. it’s been straight up in your face (how many people have told stories about their conservative families immediately picking up on will being gay this season? many of us had noticed from season 1 onwards after years of media analysis under a queer lens, but this is the first time, at least to me, that it’s been so overt even cishets have noticed properly)

listen. i could be putting my clown wig on again on july 1st, but i’m really, really hopeful. i don’t think i’ve ever been this confident in the canonicity of a ship before. i have no idea why they would set up byler only to do nothing with it… other than pure malicious intent. (can we all promise to wreak havoc if that’s the case?) but honestly, i don’t think it’ll come to that. let’s hope stranger things pulls off this ambitious straightbait of the century. they’ve done it once, let’s hope they can do it again right.

[tuiyla]

How do you headcanon Quinn figuring out brittana were a thing?

Ohh good question.

So like for pretty much everyone else in the Glee Club I think it's a process rather than one moment in particular. I think Brittana started their making out party trick end of freshman year and Quinn rolled her eyes, given her upbringing and how carefully she cultivated her own reputation. Then during the summer and beginning of sophomore year they continued and amped it up and maybe Quinn chewed Santana over it, told her they were all supposed to be in Celibacy Club and all. Santana called her a stuck-up bitch and pointed out that Quinn was pretty much the only virgin in Celibacy Club. Plus, Santana reasoned, it got guys super worked up and increased their overall popularity. Quinn raised an eyebrow over why Brittana felt the need to do it so frequently but she accepted that the innocent church girl was her look, not her friends'.

I also think she was irrationally grumpy about it on a lot of days but she internalized all that instead of giving it a voice like Santana would have. By 'irrationally' I mean that Quinn didn't quite know why it bothered her, because despite her upbringing she wasn't approaching it from a homophobic perspective nor did she think it was anything too serious. She did realize sooner than perhaps Brittana themselves that it went deeper than a party trick, though, and that's what bothered her closeted ass. But then everything with Puck and Finn and the pregnancy happened and she had other things to worry about. After all that she could also rationalize her envy of Brittana as them still being cheerleaders instead of, ya know.

In junior year Quinn was mostly busy trying to pretend sophomore year didn't happen and having her rivalry for the Alpha Bitch position with Santana. I think she might have caught Brittana glances in the locker room, lingering touches, generally the two of them being, well, Brittana. Quinn had her suspicions that this really was something deeper than what started as a joke in freshman year but once again she had other stuff to think about. That was, until Landslide happened and she knew beyond the shadow of a doubt. She'd known earlier but that was when she knew, you know? When she realized it wasn't a joke or a phase or anything of the sort. And I have a Quinntana scene in mind that I wish had happened here, more on that in another ask.

The face of a girl who knows feat. Mike Chang

In my mind Quinn tried to talk to Santana about it (because it was Santana who started crying, Santana who was like a ghost of herself afterward, Santana whom she'd been having a rivalry with) but it didn't go well, exactly. So Quinn knew but unlike certain people she was smart enough to know it wasn't her business, and she was also busy with her life falling apart as everything that had happened caught up with her and she had her mental breakdown. Then beginning of senior year she was once again busy with her own shit, but nonetheless she was pissed off when she heard about The Outing. I'd like to think that even though she had other things going and she never had The Talk with Brittana, she went feral whenever a creep approached Santana in the hallway or was any kind of shitty to Brittany.

So like I say it was a process and I have to factor in the myriad of things Quinn had going on in her own life. I think she initially had issues but that was all about image and her own repressed feelings, and once she realized Brittana's feelings went deeper for each other she was rooting for them to make it. With Quinn it's complicated ya know, because she does have her own issues (girl is not straight herself idc that it's never outright said on Glee) and I'm sure gay people in general were not looked upon kindly in the Fabray house. On top of that, Quinn feeling excluded because of Brittana's connection, maybe holding a bit of resentment because of that even though she does want them to be happy. And it being this long process until she's finally 100% sure it's the real deal and her friends are in love, and even then the journey until they're an official public couple. Quinn's in a unique position for all of it, both because of who she is and who Brittana are to her. Which is friends, btw. #UnholyTrinityWasReal

[lizisshortforlizard]

Living Dangerously - Chapter 22

Jurassic Park’s animal handlers: none of them ever mentioned by name in Michael Crichton’s original novel. Who were they? What were their lives like on Isla Nublar? Did any of them survive the disaster?

A year in the life of those responsible for the care of the dinosaurs. Many people would kill to have their jobs.

But would they die for it?

Jurassic Park Novel/Jurassic Park Film (1993)

Viewpoint: 3rd person female oc

Warnings: light swears, relationship breakdown, butt-load of angst

Wordcount: ~65.7k (22 Chapters) [incomplete]

Tagging: @heresthefanfiction @howlingmadlady @arrthurpendragon @ocappreciation

Read on Ao3

Chapter 21 | Chapter 23

How’m I Gonna Sleep - Tim Finn

“You’re joking.” Lizzy objected flatly.

”Do I sound like I’m joking?” Muldoon didn't back down.

She shook her head in bewilderment, face like a smacked arse. “Why?”

“Your skills are required. I can’t say any more just yet.”

”I thought you were on my side.”

”And you have a job to do. You’re going. Pack your bags.”

Lizzy didn’t say another word. She turned around and walked straight out of his office before she told him exactly where he could shove that idea. What the Hell was happening?

Richardson might be the one to pull a fast one on her like this, but Muldoon?

She felt betrayed more than anything. She'd thought they were friends. He didn’t even ask her if she’d consider it. Just told her.

Pack your bags.

What exactly had she done wrong?

***

Tom was outside, in front of the still-incomplete visitor centre, doing shirtless pull-ups off a tree branch, all while smoking a cigarette.

“…Seven…c’mon, come to Daddy…eight…Hey, Liz!” He stopped and dangled, sweat dripping off him, when he saw her heading his way. “Betcha can’t do more than three of these!”

No answer. Huh, that was weird. She’d normally leap at the chance to prove him wrong.

”Where ya goin’, lady?”

She kept her head ducked, hurrying along. Tom didn't like that at all. He dropped down from the branch and picked up his shirt, mopping his brow.

“Liz! Talk to me."

Still nothing.

Tom frowned and stubbed his cigarette out, pulling his shirt back on before sprinting after her.  

***

“Armstrong, come in Armstrong, over.” Arnold sounded supremely fed up as he tried to reach her. Kathy and Rico were beside him, tracking the weather systems for the next few days and working out how their dinosaur care plans might be affected.

"She isn't in the park." Kathy called to him. "She went to Muldoon's."

"Then why the Hell is she not answering, huh?! Somethin's goin' on, I'm tellin ya!" Arnold threw his radio down and spoke into his phone instead. "No, no, nothing's wrong, buddy. It's a big island, that's all."

Tom's voice drawled over the radio. "Dr Armstrong isn't feeling well, can I take a message?"

"She with you, Kennedy?" Arnold asked grumpily.

There was a break as Tom clearly consulted with someone off-air. "...who wants to know?"

"Her New York man's on the phone. It's important, apparently. Needs to get her butt down here, now. Over and out." Arnold clicked off and yelled to Kathy again. "I told you this tie was a mistake, Kitty-Kat! I am not a messenger boy!"

***

An important call from Simon. Something awful must have happened. He'd only rang her yesterday, when he'd agreed to visit.

Lizzy wasn't sure she could take any more bad news so close together. Sorry she whispered to Ray as she hurried in, he was glaring at her furiously.

“I'm here. Who died?" She asked abruptly as she took the phone.

“Huh? Nobody died, Liz! I just have some good news. Some really great news, in fact. Gonna make your whole month, babe. Couldn't wait until I saw you in person."

“Out with it then!" Maybe a little snappy, she realised.

“Uh, okay, well since I was promoted to partner at the law firm, my folks gave me a bit of money. Rather a lot of money, actually, and Liz-“ Simon paused for effect. “-we’re getting married in a year. A year next Tuesday to be exact. I did it. I booked the Plaza.”

“Oh.” Lizzy didn’t know what to say. “I, uh-…” She should be excited. But dread was rapidly filling her from the toes of her boots upwards.

Kathy, Rico and Ray had stopped conversing and were quietly watching her, sensing something was wrong.

“And my mom’s picked out a dress for you. Isn’t that great?”

What?

She fumbled for whoever’s hand was closest and grabbed it before sinking down in a chair.

“Hermana?” Rico was immediately concerned. “Lizzy?”

Suddenly she was struggling to take a breath. Her chest felt like she was being crushed inwards by a boa constrictor. Kathy stared at her hard for a moment before scurrying off to source a glass of water.

”Liz? Isn’t that great?” Simon repeated.

She didn't really hear him. She was back in Africa. Standing in the pink dawn glow, looking out to the horizon, listening to the waking calls of animals and birds echoing across the plains.

New York was crowded, and cold, and a different kind of noise. The grey kind.

Then she thought of Costa Rica, her new home. African animals replaced by dinosaurs bellowing through the hills. Her job, the job of a lifetime. The countless doors that had opened for her and her research because she was working at Jurassic Park. Simon had never understood why she just couldn’t stop, couldn't give it up, and he would never try to.

It was all so very clear now. Whether he visited or not, they just weren't going to work. They had both changed, no longer two kids in New York City, too different now.

“Uh, hello? Liz? Say something, please.” Now Simon sounded worried.

“You should have asked.” She replied quietly.

“Sorry, the line broke up just then. What did you say?”

She suddenly felt unbearably hot. The control room was so stuffy. Her breathing was shallower, she felt like she couldn't breathe out, only in, and that her ribcage might burst from the pressure.

Lizzy had always wanted a family. A real one. Ten years ago, when she first met Simon she had thought that meant a husband and kids. A Volvo and a house you paid a mortgage on. Picket fences. The American Dream. But her friends on Isla Nublar, Jeff back in Africa, that was her family.

Falling into fits of laughter with Kathy when they tried and failed to toast marshmallows on the stovetop without setting off the fire alarm. Gerry making her coffee just right. Ray's sarcastic comments that always made her laugh no matter her mood. That was home. And Simon wasn't going to ever be part of it.

She couldn't, wouldn't get married. She didn't want it, and nobody was listening to her.

“That’s very generous of them-“ She blinked hard to keep the tears in check. “But I told you, tried to tell you, I don’t want a big wedding.”

“Yeah, but this way you don’t need to worry. It’s taken care of. It’s happening.”

It’s happening. He hadn't even asked her. Africa had never seemed further away. And now Isla Nublar was being ripped from her, twice in the same day.

“Babe...aren’t you excited?”

“Simon!” She started to panic. “There isn’t going to be anyone on my side of the room in New York!”

There was a long pause, and she knew she was in trouble.

“Mom said you’d be like this.” He told her flatly. “You’d find a reason to hate it.”

“I thought we were talking about getting married in Africa-“ She tried to pacify him.

“Well, it isn’t always about what you want, Liz!” Simon was clearly upset. “I’ve waited long enough for you. We need to start having kids, before-“

“Before what?”

“Before you’re too old!”

“What did you just say?” Lizzy raised her voice, and for once, Simon didn't back down.

“You know what I mean! We’re thirty-four, and well…no offence, but time’s running out.”

“What’s happening?” Tom walked into the control room. "You havin' a team party without me? Nice, real nice." Kathy hushed him.

“I can’t do this.” Lizzy couldn’t believe the words were coming out of her mouth.

“What do you mean?” Simon’s tone became negotiating when he finally realised she was genuinely upset. “Look, if it’s that big of a deal to you we can postpone, again-“

“No, we can’t.”

“It’s fine. Maybe the year after next.”

It wasn’t fine. Nothing was fine.

“No. I can't do this. I don’t want to get married. To you…I don’t want to get married to you.”

“You don’t mean that.”

She didn't deny.

“Lizzy? Tell me you don’t mean it.”

“I can’t-“ Lizzy gulped and crushed the life out of Rico’s hand. “I don’t want to anymore. You and me. I’m so sorry-“

The disconnect tone sounded. He had hung up.

She slowly put the phone down herself, and realised what she’d done. Regret, pain, and most worrying of all, relief, filled her to the brim.

Arnold spoke first. "Baby girl, I'm so sor-"

Lizzy held up a hand. She wanted quiet. Her mind was going off the rails.

"Shit..." Tom wasn't much help.

Kathy pushed the glass of water towards her. "What do you need?"

"Si, hermana. Anything."

Lizzy got up from her chair and took off. She didn’t know where she was going, just that there were too many people staring at her and it was too much for her to stand. She ran out into the park.  

***

”Lizzy, hun!” Kathy screamed into the trees. She was getting desperate. It had been hours. The sun was sinking low, Lizzy wouldn’t stay out all night…would she?

Damn, but the island was a lot safer than the middle of the Namibian bush. It was still warm enough to sleep out. Lizzy was sure as Heck stubborn.

But accidents happen. She might have tripped and broken her ankle, and be lying unconscious at the bottom of a valley.

“Where are you, girl?” She whispered. “Don’t do this to me.”

“Want me to round up the guys for a search party?” Isaac asked her. “We could check the motion sensors too?”

“Worth a shot, but she might not be moving. Cameras won’t pick her up.” Kathy groaned.

“Well then, what do we do?”

“We don’t need a search party.” Kathy turned to walk back towards the lodge. “Unless it's a party of one."

***

Kathy made a shooing motion and nodded towards the door. "Go on, get out there. Do what you do best. Go hunt."

"It's a bit more complicated than that. And why wasn't I informed before now?" Muldoon asked gravely. "Have you been making decisions again, Baker?"

"Tom told me what happened. Between you and Lizzy. That she didn't take the idea of moving to Sorna very well." Kathy answered quietly.

"She did not." Massive understatement. Although at least he wasn't the main reason she'd done a runner. In a rather interesting development, Armstrong was no longer engaged. Which meant that his plan for Sorna had gone awry. But Muldoon couldn't worry about that yet. At this moment in time, she was a missing person. His priority was to retrieve her, and quickly.

"Well, she's not back, it's dark and we're out of options. Can you find her or what?" Kathy demanded.

"Almost certainly. She won’t get very far, at least." Muldoon grumbled as he headed to the door.

"Need some help, boss?" Tom offered.

"Hunted more vicious things than her, I'll be fine." Muldoon answered. "Maybe I should take a shock prod though, what do you reckon?"

Kathy just stared at him, open-mouthed. Even Tom looked stunned.

"I was joking." He muttered. "Christ, that bloody woman."

***

Think like Armstrong.

Damn, now that was a scary notion.

At least they were on an island. Even so, thirty square miles was a massive search area. He had to narrow it down.

So, let’s go about this logically. If he knew her, which he did of course, then this disappearing act was her way of saying she needed help. She just didn’t know how to ask, and she hated appearing weak in front of the lads.

Meaning, she wanted someone to come and get her, bring her back. She had to know it would most likely be him, since he was the only person on the island that could track worth a damn, except for Kennedy, perhaps.

So where would Armstrong go, that only he might think of?

Muldoon braked hard and put the Jeep in reverse, going back on himself to take the other turning that led towards the tyrannosaur paddock.

Of course that’s where she is.

He was certain she would be perched on the very same tree she’d riddled with bullets not long ago. A place not obvious to just anyone.

Fortunately, Muldoon wasn’t just anyone.

He chose to kill the ignition and stalk the last few hundred metres. Headlights and engine noise might scare her off, if she thought she was in trouble.

Muldoon was actually enjoying himself. Out in the park alone, at night, was a rare opportunity. Good to know he hadn’t lost his touch. It had been a long while, since he had needed to hunt for…anything, really. And this time, he had no weapon.

Because he was hunting for a wildcat. He found the clearing where the fallen tree was, without much difficulty.

”I know you’re here, Armstrong.”

He hadn’t heard her, yet. Just a feeling. That from somewhere close by, he was being watched. And his feelings, instincts, call it what you will, were very rarely wrong.

“Hurry up and say something, woman, before I trip over you.” No girl this time. He did value his life, somewhat.

If he remembered correctly the tree was off to the left, in the direction of where the tyrannosaur was rumbling around in her paddock.

Muldoon reached for his torch and scanned the ground in front of him.

Ah, there it was. He had been right all along. Boot prints tracked away from him through the mud. Looked about a size seven US. Yes, she was definitely here, definitely wanted someone to come and get her. She knew better than to wear her distinctively small boots in boggy ground if she was trying to hide from him. The prints were partially filled with water, and the surface wobbled every few seconds. Rexy was on the move.  

“Over here.” A small Scottish voice finally spoke up. “How’d you know?”

Muldoon pointed the torch in the right direction. Sure enough, hazel eyes were staring back at him in the beam of light.

“Because I know you, daft bugger.” He went to sit down next to her on the tree trunk. “Can’t hide from me.”

They were silent for a few minutes, until his radio hissed, earning a quick grunt from the startled tyrannosaur.

“-uldoon, give me some good news. Can’t see you on the monitor anymore, over.” Arnold complained.

“Found her.”

”Oh! Oh thank God- Is she-“ Kathy started babbling away until Muldoon answered she’s fine curtly and switched his radio off. They could wait.

”I had to leave, it was all a bit much.” Her voice was hoarse. She’d been crying. “Just needed some space.”

“Nobody can hear you scream out here. Except the tyrannosaur.”

”That was kind of the point.” She let her head flop back, staring up at the stars.

“Still a bloody stupid thing to do. Running off like that.”

Away from her problems, yet again.

”You must be fuming.” She stated unhappily.

“Baker’s the one who’ll crucify you when we get back.”

Just glad you’re safe. He thought the words but didn’t say them. “Did you ever pull a stunt like this with Blacklaw?” Distracting her was a good move.

“No, but he grounded me once.”

Muldoon turned his laugh into a cough. The thought of his mate attempting to ground an unrelated woman in her twenties who wasn’t much shorter than him was quite funny.

“What on Earth did you do?”

“I called Sarah Harding a c-, er…the c-word. To her face.” Lizzy grimaced. “Apparently it’s much more offensive in the States.”

“Practically a friendly greeting, back in Glasgow, I’d imagine.”

”That’s what I said!” Lizzy groaned. "Thought she was going to bloody bite me."

"Wouldn't put it past her."

"At least I won't run into her anymore if she comes to visit Gerry, since I’m meant to be packing, I suppose.”

Muldoon shifted uncomfortably. Ah, Sorna. Now he had his wits back about him, maybe he had been too hasty about sending Armstrong away. He’d acted out of spite, hadn’t asked, just told her.

”Don’t worry about Sorna at the moment.” He said eventually. “We’ll talk about it properly in the morning. When we’re both more rational.”

”Really? Do I get some input this time?” That seemed to cheer her up a little.

”You can plead your case.”

She sniffed loudly and nodded.

“Shall I give you a lift back?” It was more of a threat than a question.

There was the faintest scuff of gravel as she planted her feet further apart. Was she really about to give him the runaround?

Oh no, he wasn’t having that.

“Careful. If you think I won’t drag you back inside that Jeep just to get Baker off my case, think again.”

She was silent, the cogs were turning. Trying to figure out if she was faster than him. In the dark. Without her glasses.

Not a chance he thought.

Was she going to bolt? Or just feeling well enough now to wind him up about attempting it?

He liked either choice, to be honest. Both meant she’d forgiven him.

“Don’t do it, Armstrong.” He warned. “Don’t you dare run.”

I’d catch you. And it would make my day.

She turned to him with a tiny smile. “Yeah, okay, you win. Let’s head back.”

***

On the journey back, Lizzy took off her engagement ring.  She rolled the Jeep window down, looked out at the jungle, down at the band, debating, then rolled the window back up again, still with the ring in the palm of her hand.

”Say you lost it. Believable enough.” Muldoon offered. He’d seen the state of her bedroom.

”Better not. It was his great-grandma’s. Survived a concentration camp. Makes me a complete arsehole.” Lizzy decided. “I’ll send it back.”

”Shame, that rock would probably put my daughter through university.”

”How is she?” Lizzy was grateful for the change in subject.

”Thoroughly enjoying being the class elephant expert, thanks to you.”

She nodded, pleased. She’d spent ages on that book. Good to know her efforts were appreciated.

Lizzy felt guilty now that Muldoon had gone to all this trouble for her. She would've come back of her own accord, eventually.

She didn't remember running from the control room, or even what direction she went in once she left the building. Only that she somehow reached the tyrannosaur paddock at twilight just as the quartz lights were coming on, all over the park. Her favourite time of day.

It had seemed a good place to stop. Not too far from home, but quiet, where she wouldn't be disturbed. She'd found the fallen tree and sat for a long time as the darkness drew in around the island, listening to the bugs buzzing around and the stegosaurs lowing like cattle as they gathered together for the night.

And then Muldoon had found her. Lizzy surprised herself with how glad she was to hear his voice in the darkness, despite their falling-out.

She was even more relieved, yet  surprised he didn’t have Kathy in tow, the renowned over-thinker. Lizzy didn’t want to analyse every detail of her break-up right at that minute. Maybe never.

What did it matter? It was over now.

Muldoon put the Jeep in neutral and idled out of view of the visitor complex for a minute, turning to speak to her. “I can drive you around the other side, if you’d rather. Sneak you in through the garage. You don’t have to face everyone just yet.”

She shook her head. “It’s okay. Can’t avoid them forever.”

He nodded and they moved off again. Kathy was waiting for them on the steps at the sound of the engine in the distance, hopping from one foot to the other, trying to see if there were two people inside the Jeep.

As they drew up Lizzy spoke again.

”Thank you.”

”For what, exactly?”

”Just for knowing."

He had a feeling she didn’t mean how he'd worked out exactly where to find her. Lizzy got out of the Jeep and walked straight into Kathy's arms, holding her tightly in a hug long after the vehicle moved off again.

Muldoon ended up sitting in the parked Jeep by himself for a while, doing some thinking of his own in the garage.

Armstrong was single. It hadn't really sunk in yet.

Since she’d floored Richardson with that technical question within the first hour of her first day, he’d fancied her something terrible. And it was only getting worse the more time they spent together.

Simply put, she was brilliant. And she wasn't the only one who wanted a challenge.

But in a way, this was worse, much worse. Before, she was completely off-limits, for obvious reasons.

Now there was hope, but Muldoon's hopes had been dashed before. He wasn’t sure if he could take much more of it.

***

Thanks for reading!

The chapter title song is one that Tim Finn wrote just before he and Greta Scacchi split up in 1989. Greta in the 90s is my faceclaim for Lizzy. The song seemed fitting for this one 🖤

And Lizzy and Simon are through. A comfortable relationship isn’t always a happy one, unfortunately.