#and / or whether they successfully tell him about the relationship

[wrenaspun]

Just wanted to tell you that I love your writing so much — I reread “one way or another” like once a month at least. And any fic where you write from Laurent’s perspective is automatically incredible showstopping never been done before etc. in my eyes. Nobody gets the depths of his horniness for Damen quite like you :)

Anyway for the prompt, how about Laurent and Damen trying to figure out the best way to tell Auguste (alive) about their relationship

Aw anon, thank you, that's very kind!! I'm so glad you enjoy the fic(s) enough to return to them <3 For the prompt, this ficlet ended up taking place in the same 'verse as burst the sky in my head, but it should also stand alone just fine! -

“You could hire a skywriter,” Damen suggested lazily. He had one arm behind his head and was staring drowsily up at the clear Ios sky, his sun-browned skin glistening in the sunlight, looking like some artist’s wet dream of a classical painting.

Laurent scooped up a handful of sand and threw it at him.

None of it landed above his shoulder, but Damen’s face scrunched up anyway, and he brought his free hand up to brush fussily at a few nonexistent grains on his nose. Then he reached out and took Laurent’s hand and brought it to his lips. “You could have one of those parties,” he said, while Laurent tried not to melt under the combined force of the sun and Damen’s sheer charm. “With the glitter, and the announcements — what do they call them?”

“Gender reveal parties?”

“That,” said Damen. He mimed a balloon popping. “Congratulations, it’s a boyfriend.”

“That is not what Auguste would say if I burst a blue glitter balloon in his face,” said Laurent, but he spent a few minutes thinking about doing it anyway, just for the look they would get.

The problem was, there was no good way to tell one’s older brother that one was seeing his nemesis-turned-friend. More — that one was in love with said friend, wanted everything that came with that, to get married, to spend their lives together. Laurent curled his toes into the sand.

Not for the first time, he wished Auguste was a little less straightforward. But that was unfair, because he loved his brother’s unflappable straightforwardness, his easy candidness. It wasn’t really his fault that it made things difficult for Laurent, who had come out to his mother at the age of fourteen by saying well… in a delicately sceptical tone when she talked about his bringing girlfriends home. The next week she’d said the same thing but about boyfriends and he hadn’t corrected her and they’d understood each other quite perfectly ever since.

Auguste, good-natured and oblivious, would not pick up on such a hint. He was quite useless at picking up any hints at all, as a childhood full of poorly-coordinated cover stories for Laurent’s attempts at mischief would attest.

But if Laurent couldn’t hint, the only alternative then was to say it aloud: Auguste, I’m in love with Damen. I want to spend the rest of my life with him. Laurent wanted it so much that it became impossible to say. His desire was so ravenously enormous that it looped back around to being mortifying. He felt as though he had a very large, very poorly behaved dog behind him all the time, trying to get at Damen. He’d never felt like this before about anyone.

“You could hire a musician,” said Damen. And opened one deep brown eye to peek up at him, his merriment poorly disguised. “To sing it at him.”

“Will you please take this seriously,” Laurent grumbled, but even his voice was conspiring against him, refusing to sound sharp. He sounded disgustingly smitten.

Damen sat up, brushed off his torso, and then in a single graceful movement of rippling muscle he manoeuvred himself onto Laurent, pushed him down into the warm sand, pinned him bodily in place. “Believe me,” he said; Laurent’s whole body was flushed and thrilled, “I’m taking this very seriously.” He drew his nose over Laurent’s jaw, and even that minute touch sent sparks down Laurent’s spine. He turned his head and pressed a vicious kiss to Damen’s neck, applying his teeth, revelling in the laughing groan this wrung from Damen’s chest.

“Laurent,” he said breathlessly. Laurent hummed, and Damen said his name again, his smile audible. “I have another idea.”

Laurent broke reluctantly away. “Tell me.”

“Auguste texted me ten minutes ago asking where we were.”

“He what?” Alarmed.

“Well, he’s on break too,” said Damen, in an eminently reasonable tone.

“Is he coming down to join us?”

“He said something along those lines,” said Damen. “I didn’t want to interrupt your lecture on Professor Euandros’ shortcomings.”

“Oh my god, shut up,” Laurent muttered. Teaching Professor Euandros’s third-year course on classical poetry had been a nightmare that he would need the whole summer break to recover from. The man hadn’t met an organisational system he didn’t hate with a violent passion. “So Auguste — but what was your idea?”

“Oh,” said Damen. He rolled off Laurent and sat up — a poor start. Laurent said so and watched as Damen’s teeth showed in a dazzling grin. “Here, sweetheart,” Damen said, tugging Laurent closer to him. “Let him find us like this, and you won’t have to say a word. I’ll do all the talking.”

“Like this?” They were both sitting up now, leaning against each other, skin to skin. Intimate, but very innocent. Damen made an affirmative noise. Laurent hummed thoughtfully, then let himself slide down until his head was in Damen’s lap.

“Or like this,” Damen agreed, stroking his warm fingers through Laurent’s hair.

Laurent hummed again. Then, teasing, he turned his face and nuzzled in a certain direction. Damen jolted. Laurent bit down on a smile.

“Not like that,” said Damen. The beach was empty aside from them — it was small and relatively unpopular, and the vast majority of people had gone back to work last week — but there was still the little thrill of exposure. “Fucking hell, Laurent.”

“You said ten minutes ago,” said Laurent. Desire was swelling in his chest, as wild and as wide as the sea.

Damen said, “Yes,” very carefully. A man who knew exactly the kind of trap that was being sprung on him.

Laurent said, “It takes thirty to get down here from the university.”

[42ap]

In this AU, Ford’s ideal is to save the world, but in practice, he spends a lot of time hunting and killing monsters. He feels rigid and hard when touched, only for it to become clear that he always carries two guns with him. His paranoia can’t entirely be called irrational, since he has indeed made plenty of enemies.

As mentioned before, Ford and Stan have a friends-with-benefits relationship in this AU, but they’ve barely had any sexual encounters. In fact, after Ford came back, they didn’t do anything at all; they only had a few encounters when they were younger, so in total, it amounts to “almost none.”

When they were young, their father would often tell Ford to keep an eye on his brother. Stan, the mad dog who stirred up trouble and picked fights, always had Ford behind him, who came up with plans and fixed problems. The two brothers were inseparable, and this was how people perceived them. But one day, Ford accidentally found out that Stan had feelings for him.

Ford was utterly disgusted and got into a huge fight with Stan. He found Stan repulsive, accused him of being mentally ill, and questioned whether all of Stan’s familial affection was motivated by something impure. Stan couldn’t successfully lie to convince Ford that he didn’t have feelings for him, nor could he make Ford believe that he was capable of restraining himself and maintaining a normal relationship. It was a brutal argument, and by the end of it, Ford suddenly calmed down. He stared at Stan, sneered coldly, and said, “You say you like me? Prove it. Show me how much you like me and how obedient you can be.”

And so they did it. It wasn’t painful, nor was it pleasurable. Stan genuinely liked Ford, but he was just barely transitioning from being straight, and his mind hadn’t fully processed everything yet. But in that moment, it seemed like the only way to gain Ford’s forgiveness or to stop his anger was to prove it to him, so he did it, full of fear and anxiety. He was the one who liked men, so naturally, he should be the one on the bottom. Everything was messy, dragging on, not disastrous, but just a little off in every way. The lube was improvised, the foreplay was half-hearted, and even the climax felt incomplete. It wasn’t good, and it wasn’t something without regret.

In porn, the participants end up sticky, kissing, and hugging, smiling with happiness. But in reality, what Stan remembered most wasn’t Ford’s gasps but the way the evening sunlight shone in through the windows from the street, casting shadows on the dim ceiling as cars occasionally passed by.

After that, they did it once or twice more, but their relationship continued to deteriorate rapidly. Before there could be any opportunity for reconciliation, the science fair incident happened.

Ford hated him because he believed Stan had done it on purpose—Stan wanted him to stay by his side.

Ford hated him deeply because Stan had cost him a normal family. In college, he could never introduce his family or his brother in a normal, happy way when people asked about them.

“Being a twin is a birthright.” Not everyone is born with a sibling alongside them, sharing that special connection. Not everyone gets to have such a unique relationship—biologically, physically, inseparably bound. Ford hated Stan because Stan had ruined that precious privilege for him.

From the age of 20 to 60, Ford lived alone and did well for himself, doing everything he loved without anyone holding him back.

[saeist]

it’s complicated ── bakugo k. (3.4k) ⊹ ࣪ ˖ part one

“kats..” you murmur

“yeah?”

“what are we exactly?”

your voice cuts through the air. you can feel bakugo’s grip tighten around your body. like he froze in his spot right next to you in his bed.

“well, what do you want us to be?” his voice is gentle, yet there's an underlying tension. bakugo uses his free hand to tuck some hair that was getting in the way of your face. his thumb slowly caressing the apples of your cheeks as he stares into your eyes, bracing (and dreading) for your answer

this time you stay quiet. unsure how to answer or better yet, unsure how to get your point across to your... friend? semi lover? your situationship

you know yourself that you do like bakugo. again, he might be rough around the edges but you've learned to look past that and see him for who he is

bakugo is a lot more than what he shows on the surface

and you've been given the privilege to experience the side of bakugo katsuki that he hides

"well, i don't know either.." you say truthfully after giving it much thought in such notice (lies. you've been thinking about it since the slumber party happened)

unbeknownst to you, bakugo's heart drops. what do you mean you don't know what you want to be with him? did you not like him back? bakugo's almost certain you do. if you don't like him then why are you in bed with him? if you don't like him then why do you bother sticking around?

bakugo's thoughts are getting to him. you can tell with the way he's slowly unwrapping his arms around you and sits up.

for the first time, the air is suffocating. neither of you speak up on the situation that's brewing just from an innocent question about where your little relationship is heading

"i should leave.." you mutter, slowly pulling yourself off his bed and heading towards the door

"... yeah" bakugo rasps, almost like a whisper, looking away

there's a little ache in your heart when he didn't even bother stopping you. pursing your lips, you quietly leave his room to head back to yours

did you ruin whatever chances you had with your question?

the door closed behind you with a soft click, but it echoed loudly in your mind, marking the beginning of an uneasy distance.

—

the following day, the tension between you two becomes palpable during training.

the air is thick with unresolved tension. you were coincidentally paired with bakugo this time around and bakugo’s usual focus is a little disrupted. his movements remain sharp as they are but his usual techniques feel a little all over the place, almost as if he couldn't focus at all. obviously you notice but you’re hesitant to approach and you don't act on it. you ignored the way he was being a little rougher that you swore you were gonna get bruises at the end of the session.

midway through the intense spar, you have successfully pinned bakugo down after hitting him with your quirk and in that moment, you both lock eyes. there’s a flicker of something – hurt, longing, confusion – but neither of you speaks

bakugo uses your distraction to his advantage and changes the scene. this time it was you who was pinned on the ground.

ectoplasm, who was the teacher in charge for this training session has called it a tie between the two of you

you push bakugo off yourself as you walk away before bakugo could even offer his arm out for you to take. the whole class watches of course and they finally take notice of the on going tension between the two of you

something shifted in the air after that training session that it was slowly getting unbearable for everyone as the days pass by

—

for the next few days after that training session, you and bakugo were avoiding each other like the plague. turning to different directions whenever you two would bump into each other whether it be around the school halls or back at the dormitory

the lack of communication for the past few days gave you an ample amount of time to sort out your thoughts and feelings. after giving it some thoughts, you think you were now ready to face bakugo again to ask him the same question but this time you think you had an answer

although that goes all out the window when you spot him talking to someone who seemed to be from another department just outside campus on your way back to the dormitory

you quickly hid behind a nearby bush to watch everything unfold before your very eyes

bakugo has always been popular in campus. especially when he won first place during the school's sports festival but his popularity and reputation skyrocketed even further during the school festival where he showed the rest of the students that he's talented in all aspects even when it comes to musicality

so it was pretty safe to assume he had admirers around campus and you think you were about to witness a live confession

you note that the girl in front of him was holding some kind of paper bag. it looked like it was a gift. your stomach churns at the sight that you almost felt ill. swallowing whatever pride you had left, you continue to watch the two of them conversing

you watch bakugo look at her with wide eyes. like he was surprised or something, you couldn’t really tell. the girl fidgets with the gift bag before bursting into giggles

that was your last straw. with a sharp breath, you leave your hiding spot and stormed away. with each step you take, the heavier it feels than the last. almost as if you were carrying the weight of uncertainty and jealousy

—

once you arrived, the people who were lounging around in the living room could tell you were upset. you did slam the front doors shut and you may or may not have unintentionally set your quirk off by locking the doors in the process. the rest of the class who weren't home yet, had to get kirishima to break the locks off.

by the time bakugo arrived, he finds the front doors broken much to his surprise. shrugging, he heads inside to see his friends and your friends all huddled up

"do you guys think they broke up?"

"hold up.. they were dating?!"

"omg keep up kaminari! well we think they did but they didn't really confirm it"

"wait! no wonder they're not seen together anymore! bakugo does look a little-"

"looks a little what?!" bakugo cuts off kirishima mid sentence by making his presence known to the group. all the girls and kaminari scream in surprise before scrambling to get away, not wanting to feel bakugo's wrath now that he himself knows that they were talking about him behind his back

kirishima throws his arm over bakugo's shoulder, completely unfazed by his usual antics at this point.

"as i was saying, you look a little out of it for the past few days. something happened to ya?" kirishima asks, "just a little while ago, y/n came home all upset and seemed to lock the locks that i had to break it so the rest of you could come in" he continues

bakugo's eyes widened. fuck, he thinks to himself. bakugo's almost 99% sure why you were upset. he isn't dense as you think he is. he actually noticed you hiding behind the bushes when he was caught up with a student from a different course– who only came up to him to tell him that his zipper was all the way down before skipping back to her own friends

which was totally uncalled for as bakugo thinks

"earth to bakugo? anyone in there? or are the lights left open but nobody is home?" kirishima jokes, waves his hand around bakugo's face, breaking his trance

"shut up and mind your own damn business! all of you!" bakugo booms, loud enough that the girls who were hiding around could hear him

kirishima sighs, "now i don't know what's going on between you and y/n, but you guys need to talk. we don't like the tension going on and it's disrupting the class. talk to her, bro"

with that, kirishima walks away. bakugo could only stare at his back. he hates to admit it but kirishima is right. you guys do need to talk.

huffing, bakugo stomps his way towards his own room to change from his uniform and to formulate what he wants to say

—

meanwhile, amidst everything going on downstairs in the common area, you locked yourself in your room in attempt to calm yourself down.

"suppress it, y/n. it doesn't matter if someone else likes him! why would it matter to you anyway? you two aren't even a thing! friends don't get jealous over petty shit like this.." you sat in front of your dresser, repeatedly reminding yourself with your status with the blonde

suddenly you hear knocks on your door. you jolt up in surprise, totally not expecting anyone to check up on you after your little outburst. you looked in front of the mirror in case you had any makeup smeared or what not

the knocking gets louder by the minute and you scramble to open the door. when the door opens, you were met with all of the girls, who promptly invited themselves inside your room

"what's up..?" you say, unsure on what's going on

"what's up? what's up with you and bakugo is what's up! what's going on with the two of you?!" mina gets straight to the point, not even wasting a single second

at the mention of bakugo's name. your face sours

"nothing's going on" you sigh, not wanting to think about what happened just moments ago

"if nothing's going on then why do you look like that?" tsuyu questions

"like what?"

"like you're about to cry yourself to sleep!" mina exaggerates, pointing a finger at your face

did you really look that miserable?

with a deep sigh, you flop down on your bed, staring at the ceiling

"i think i like him" you start, feeling embarrassed to even say it out loud

"you think?!" mina reacts, lying down next to you

"mina! let her talk first" uraraka interjects, waiting for you to continue

"since you guys are all here let me just sum up what happened. so basically, i asked him what were we a few nights ago-"

hagakure squeals before immediately clamping her hand around her mouth

"sorry! continue.."

"anyway as i was saying, and then he turned the question back to me and i said i don't know because at the time i didn't know either! i didn't want to make the first move and yeah so now we're here" you finish your little story time quickly to save yourself from further embarrassment

the girls take their time to digest your little dilemma. the stunned silence is what made you realized what you just said. the post yap clarity getting to you

yaoyorozu was the first one to break the silence

"this is all my fault, y/n-san! i should've kept my question to myself instead of asking you. i'm so sorry" yaoyorozu cries out, hands flying to her face

with a sad smile, you reach over to remove her hands off her face

"it's not your fault, yaomomo. in fact you made me realize where we were standing. if anything, you helped me" you try to laugh it off.

well, it was true for the most part. yaoyorozu's question was the trigger you needed to help you realize what was going on between you and bakugo

"well, we don't really know what to say.. but you guys should talk" jirou says, patting your leg in a way to comfort you at least

"yeah i thought so too. we'll talk eventually.." you murmured. now all you want to do is to just lay in bed

"okay guys, visiting hours is over, let's all let y/n rest for the mean time" tsuyu prompts. all the girls agree and slowly they all get up from your bed and start to head out

you sit up, watching them huddle to your door.

"thanks guys" you smile at your friends, "thank you for checking up on me"

mina waves her hand off, "duh! we're your friends and we don't like seeing our friends upset. right guys?" mina ignites cheers.

"now we'll leave you alone with your thoughts. you know where to find us!" uraraka waves you goodbye before they all head out, leaving you alone.

once they were gone, you lay back down. now what? do you ask him first? no, that won't do. you already asked the question that brought you guys this dilemma in the first place. maybe you'll fuck things up even more

you're overthinking at this point. you close your eyes and attempt to sleep it off. yeah, that's what you need right now. maybe when you wake up, you'll be more level headed but for now, you just need to rest and that's what you do

on the way out of your room, the girls all run into kirishima in the hallway.

"girl intervention?" kirishima jokes, bumping fists with everyone

"hah! i wish. we were just checking up on y/n after her little outburst earlier. how's the door by the way?" mina asks, waving goodbye to the rest of the girls who went on their own separate ways

"nice. i just talked to bakugo too. told him he needs to get his shit together and talk to y/n since it's clearly noticeable to everyone that they're both going through something" kirishima shares

mina nods along to what he was saying. hopeful that their words get through your heads.

—

it was dinner time when bakugo takes notice of your absence in the table. he scanned the room, noting that everyone else was present. so where were you?

"where's y/n?" bakugo speaks before he could think. kirishima and mina both share a knowing look. "is she not gonna eat?"

"she's sleeping" tsuyu answers

"at this hour? it's literally 7:30PM!" kaminari cries out, "man, your self care practices really rubbing off of her huh?" he jokes, elbowing sero who was laughing at his implication

"what did you say, dunce face?!" bakugo stands up, explosions going off on his palms.

"bakugo! manners!" iida scolds him. bakugo huffs and sits back down, chomping down on his food

bakugo takes a mental note to bring you food later when he finishes his meal

—

"it's me. i brought you food" bakugo knocks on your door, waiting for you to answer. when he's met with silence, he knocks again. this time a little louder

"y/n. you need to eat" he yells, banging his fists against the material of the door. he lets out an irritated growl when he hears some locks clicking into place. an indication that you used your quirk.

"listen, i'm not afraid to blow this whole door away if it means i have to get you to eat!" bakugo yells again. he realizes his tone and clicks his tongue in annoyance that it wasn't the time to act up. "and we need to talk" he says, voice softer

bakugo waits for your response. when you weren't budging at all, he takes this as his sign to leave you alone. maybe you two can talk another time when you aren't preoccupied with other stuff

but to his surprise, you open the door. bakugo pushes it open and sees you making your way back on your bed, looking as if you just cried your eyes out

“i got you your share of food” he says, setting the plate down on your desk. you only weakly nod your head before turning to the side, not wanting to face him.

bakugo stands awkwardly in your room. this isn't the first time he's been here. usually he'd be in bed with you, studying or just hanging out. this was new to bakugo as it is new to you. you two aren't used to this.

swallowing his pride, he slowly sits down on the edge of your bed.

"listen, i want us to talk" bakugo says, unsure what to say next. he carefully watches your next move instead you just lay still.

bakugo runs a hand through his hair. he hates being put on the spot like this. he thinks back to what kirishima told him. to talk to you and here he is now but he isn't sure on what to tell you

"someone came up to me today" bakugo starts, trying to elevate the gloomy atmosphere in your room. "she was-"

"bakugo, it's fine" you cut him off

oof. bakugo. not kats?

bakugo frowns at the way his name slipped off your tongue like that. he opens his mouth to say something but you beat him to it

"it's okay if you want to see someone else. i'm not gonna stop you. who am i to stop you?" you finally sit up, looking at him straight in the eye. you just wanted this to get this over with

bakugo's eyes widened. "you didn't even let me fucking finish. she just said that my zipper was open and i wanted to blast her away" he concludes

oh

oh.

stunned by his words, you stay quiet. maybe you shouldn't have jumped into conclusions

"what? got nothing else to say?" bakugo taunts, sensing that the coast was clear, he scoots closer to you. he takes slowly takes your hands and intertwines them together

"i actually saw your dumbass hiding behind that stupid bush. i was gonna catch up with you til that extra stopped me" bakugo grumbles, staring at your hands

you felt your cheeks heat up that you were caught hiding all along.

"so no. i don't want to see anyone else when what i want is right in front of me all along" bakugo says sincerely.

your heart swells. you can feel the tears well up on your eyes again. how much crying have you even done today?

bakugo wipes your stray tears with his thumb. he then caresses your cheeks as he looks deep into your eyes

"i like you, dumbass and nobody else" bakugo grunts, feeling himself heat up

"do you mean that?"

"do i mean that? of course i fucking do! i wouldn't be up all on your ass if i wasn't" bakugo huffs, turning away, not wanting you to see the blush on his cheeks

"well, i like you too" you confess. "and i made up my mind that i want to be with you"

"i've been yours, stupid" bakugo finally turns to you and flicks your forehead. "do you really think i let anyone have the same privileges as you do?"

you laugh. well that was anticlimactic, wasn't it?

"shut up kats!"

"that's what i wanted to hear. not bakugo" bakugo grins

"well that's your name, isn't it?"

"obviously it is but it's different when you call me kats" bakugo pulls you into his embrace. "so do me a favor and get it through your pretty little head that i like you and only you. got it?"

you pulled away slightly to look up at him, seeing the softest gaze you've ever seen. who knew he was capable of looking at you that way?

"so what does this make us?" you ask

"boyfriend girlfriend?" he questions. it almost sounds too good to be true if you were being honest

suddenly an idea pops into your head. you nuzzle your face to his chest before giggling

"what are you giggling on about? us finally being official?" he asks again. your giggles sounds like music to his ears

"you have to take me out on a date first" you tease

bakugo instantly pulls away. his whole face was turning red. did those late night cuddles and conversations not count as dates?

"y/n, we've been going on dates for quite some time now-" he protests but you cut him off

"yeah but you never asked me officially. you just assumed that they were dates. i mean yeah they were dates but like, ask me out sometimes" you insist, looking up at him

bakugo feels a vein pop on his forehead. why does it feel like you were messing with him

"is this your payback from earlier from what you've seen with that bitch? i swear if i find her i'm gonna hit her with howitzer impact" bakugo grumbles.

rolling his eyes, he cups your cheeks, "fine. will you, y/n, go out on a date with me?"

with a big smile, you nod your head yes

"it's a date!"

[chuuyrr]

KISSIN' AND HOPE THEY CAUGHT US — DAZAI OSAMU

⊹ CW(s): f! reader, suggestive (kissing, touching, and making out in the office), dazai being a menace, established relationship, mentions of marriage, lovesick! dazai

⊹ SYNOPSIS: in which he wants you, and for you two to get caught

inspired by: agora hills by doja cat !

dazai osamu could never keep his hands to himself. he was dazai for goodness sake, and he has no shame, especially when it comes to you.

he enjoys being near to you at work just as much as he enjoys being with you in private. so, dazai takes every opportunity to be with you, whether it's holding your hand or twirling a strand of your hair in his hand while you work on reports, subtly leaning his head against your shoulder, or secretly squeezing your thigh, and he always loves the pink blush that spreads on your cheeks as you whisper yell him about pda.

but that's what makes it so difficult for him; dazai loves you too much to keep you a secret. you were his, and he wants everyone to know who you belong to, as well as who he belongs to.

you were about halfway through the papers given to you by the president when dazai slides next to you in his swivel chair, whining as he clings to your arm, "belladonna!~"

"osamu, i'm busy," you smile and giggle, but you quickly switch up, changing your tone as you sigh and flick his forehead, prompting a tiny scream and pout from him, "busy doing the papers you should be doing, mister."

"oh, come on! everyone has already gone out for lunch, and we're the only ones left here!" dazai grumbles as he wraps his arms around you after rubbing his forehead.

"and you insisted on staying with me! ugh, well maybe if you helped me, we can both get some lunch like the oth—" your eyes widen as dazai snatches the papers from your desk, putting them out of your reach and even causing some of the notepads and pens you had on your desk to roll off.

you gasp sharply, opening your mouth to scold him, but he slams his lips against yours, earning you a groan from him.

dazai's hands reach for your waist as he feverishly kisses you, his warm lips pressing deeply yet eagerly against yours.

you turn your face away, attempting to avoid his kiss as you let out a soft whine, trying to tell him off, "not now, osamu!"

but, alas, he closes the gap between you once more, this time much closer as his hands tenderly slide down and hold your hips to pull you into his lap.

dazai feels you squirm on his lap and finds himself chuckling in between the kisses, but he simply holds you firmly, one hand tenderly carressing your hip and the other now on the back of your neck to hold you in place.

how could he resist such a work of art as you? the way the sunlight from the window delicately highlights your face just for him to admire as your hair frames everything perfectly like icing on a cake, and don't even get him started on how you always smell so sweet like vanilla with your perfume.

dazai loves every single part of you and feels the need to be always closer to you, so he has his attention on you like a moth to a flame as you were a temptation for him.

you're so warm and plush in his embrace, and you can feel his warmth seeping through your clothes as much as his hands tenderly hold you in place on his lap.

"m-mmh, osamu. please—" you try to speak again, but he shuts you up with his lips once more, his kiss a demand as well as a declaration of love and desire.

"hush for a second, pretty girl," dazai's breath tickles your lips as he pulls away just a fraction before his lips were on yours again.

"then stop eating my face," you whine softly, grabbing his shoulders and successfully yanking your face away from him.

"aww, and why should i?" dazai says, smirking as he caresses your hip with one hand while the other glides from the back of your neck to your cheek to cup it, "you're just so tempting my dear."

"w-we're at work!" you stammer, squirming on his lap once more, "now put me down or else we might get caught, osamu!"

"too bad," dazai rolls his eyes at you, pinching your cheek before pulling you by the chin, so you were now nose-to-nose with each other.

you feel blood rush into your cheeks at his proximity, and even more so when he says the following words to you.

"i want us to get caught."

at this point, your face was on fire. in fact, the room—no, everything becomes too hot all of a sudden, prompting you to raise your voice out of surprise, "w-what? are you crazy?!"

"crazy in love with you, that is," dazai winks at you before tracing your cheek with his nose, trailing it down as his breath tickles your neck this time, and his breathy voice sends tingles up and down your spine, making you unable to sit still on his lap, "and you have no idea just how far a crazy man would go for his darling angel."

"your hips are an altar i would worship anytime of the day, my love," he whispers as his hands sensually trail from your neck and waist to your hips, squeezing them as he kisses your neck.

as one of his hands began to slip under your shirt, your breaths hitch and you couldn't help but let out a soft whine, and dazai revels in the feel of your skin as he kisses your neck, writing his love on it with marks and soft groans.

"and i know heaven is a thing because i go there whenever i touch you, and whenever i'm with you, baby," he groans with indulgence as his lips continue to kiss and bite at your neck, his hands slipping under your shirt now, caressing your side, the spot just under your chest.

dazai's emotions were all over the place, but it was desire mixed with exasperation. he immerses himself in the sensation of your lips and body during the heated moment, closing the gap between you with undeniable intimacy.

"fuck, i wanna tie the knot," he says in hushed mumbles, completely in love with you.

dazai lifts his head from your neck and presses his forehead against yours tenderly, his hands now cupping your face at a daydream of you that he has now engraved in his mind, "i wanna see my pretty girl in a wedding dress, walking up to me to be with me til' death do us part."

"and i just wanna show her off. tell everyone she's mine and no one else's," a soft, low growl escapes his breath as he claims your lips one more time with a feverish deep kiss to mark his territory, but this time it comes with a hint of tenderness as he strokes your cheek.

"osamu, we're gonna get caught," you say softly, your breath shaky, your hands still gripping his shoulders as he continues his assault of kisses.

"then let them catch us, sweetheart. you're mine to brag about," you feel dazai's smirk against your lips, and his hands on your hips again, but this time they're sliding down to squeeze your thighs in a firm grasp that causes you to squirm on his lap and wrap your arms around his neck.

dazai then purposefully but playfully bounces you on his lap, causing you to let out a sharp gasp mixed with a whine. suddenly, you hear footsteps outside the office door just as his hands begin to slip further past, and your eyes widen. it was as if he knew your coworkers were about to return from their lunch break, and he did know that.

your heart rate increases with strange excitement and fear. you squirm and try to pull yourself up and away from his lap, but he simply holds you tighter against him, his arms now locking around your waist to keep you in place.

"h-hey, now! let me go!" you whisper yell.

"oh, no. you stay right where you are, my pretty girl. i'm not letting you go," dazai says with a grin, finding amusement in your panic, "nope."

"what are we gonna tell them if they see us like this?! kunikida is gonna scold us!"

"heh, tell em' that we were kissing and hoping they caught us~"

"OSAMU!"

⊹ A.N: happy halloween! ok, but like, after re-reading this and stuff, this was waaaay better in my head ૮꒰ つᯅ⊂ ꒱ა ՞ˎˊ˗

[lizdive]

hello! platonic aventurine, jing yuan, blade, sunday, boothill, dan heng and dr ratio with a teen!reader who is like lynette from genshin?

please do include lynette’s backstory as well :3

love my girlie lynette i remember when i first got her i maxed her out as quick as possible she’s so pretty <33 idk why tumblr wasn’t cooperating with me while i was trying to format this istg,,,, tysm for requesting !! sorry this took some time,, if you’re unsatisfied just tell me and i’ll redo it !! <33

notes 𐙚 gender-neutral reader — "you" used to refer to reader ,, reader is a teenager ,, reader is based off of "lynette" from the game genshin impact ,, platonic relationships ,, mentions of being sold, close to being 'used', creepy old men, and other things relating to lynette’s past ,, yanqing is referenced in jing yuan’s part ,, mention of silver wolf in blade’s part ,, mention of march in dan heng’s part ,, mention of screwllum in dr ratio’s part ,, this is not proofread pls ignore typos especially bcs this is so long i cannot proofread this all rn

⭑ AVENTURINE has worked with many people and therefore has seen it all when it comes to appearances and personalities, but you by far are the most interesting person he’s met.

⭑ He’s tried to interact with you before, and every time you give him a bizarre and odd response he only tries harder. Mostly because he wants to properly hold a conversation with you, but also because he wants to see how odd your replies can get.

⭑ He doesn’t blame you for not trusting him so easily. Many who have joined the IPC have done it out of force and therefore trust nobody. He actually feels a bit proud that you are not naive and stay guarded around the other workers so they don’t take advantage of you. Still, he’ll try his best to befriend you so you aren’t alone.

⭑ Finds your swordsmanship very impressive. Your agility and strength brings you praise from him and sometimes he’ll watch you train. You don’t say anything to him as usual. Whenever you spot him you just stare at him with that poker face of yours and continue as if he isn’t even there.

⭑ When he notices how much tea you drink on a daily basis, he’ll gift you the finest tea on the market as a 'good job' for completing missions successfully. You’ll know it’s from him because of it’s value and because he always leaves little notes on the boxes.

⭑ If you ever invite him to have some tea and sweets with you, trust that he will be there whether it be physically or using a hologram if he’s far away. He’ll prepare tea in his location and make it look like he’s actually present with you physically in the moment.

⭑ The longer AVENTURINE spends time with you, the more he finds himself subconsciously keeping a sweet treat with him at all times in case you’re craving something. If you’re off on a mission he’ll make sure to give you money for your tea and sweet treats alone and will ask you to send him pictures of what you got.

⭑ He’s is very interested in your feline features and traits. When you tell him about your rare case of atavism, he’s very intrigued. He may do his own little experiments like buying you cat toys to see your reaction which is up to interpretation. Also, he’ll bring you fish dishes during your lunch breaks whenever you forget to bring your food!

⭑ Loves watching your performances and would be honored if you asked him to assist you! If you ever want to hold something grand-scale he’ll be more than happy to rent you a full theatre to perform in. Best advertisements for your shows and everything.

⭑ When you open up to him about your past, he can only sit there is surprise and pity. You were so young yet already went through so much before joining the IPC. He can relate to you in some ways as well. He knows what it’s like to be sold off to men who only used instead of cared.

⭑ If you tell him that man may still be alive, he’ll do a bit of research. If he is, then AVENTURINE will have a lovely gambling match with him! No worries, it’s all for fun! Fun for you, at least, when you get to go shopping with all the money the man once had but now lost. Buy yourself some nice outfits and self-care products, you deserve it !!

⭑ If you ever have moments where you feel bad or icky from your past, or have nightmares, he’ll always be there to comfort you. Call him, text him, go up to him and ask for comfort, or if he’s near and notices he’ll come and ask you if you’re okay and if you wanna talk about it. He’s good at distractions. Why not have some snacks with him, It’s time for shopping, there’s this new restaurant that opened that serves purely seafood.

⭑ He’ll do the talking for you. If anyone tries to switch from him to you he’ll either let you give the weirdest response ever or steer them back to him. He also appreciates how you don’t beat around the bush and how frank you are.

⭑ You’re bad with machines and tech? AVENTURINE doesn’t think much of it until you wreck the fifth computer that month.. oh well, he’ll just buy you a new one. He’ll try his best to teach you and help you improve and fix your machinery clumsiness, but he’ll also tease you and joke about it.

"Tea is ready, now it's time for a short rest."

"Alright, just let me finish the last paper in this file and I’ll be right there. I have some new news about [+] from the genius society~"

⭑ The general of the Luofu attending your performances instead of working? More likely than you think! You various tricks and acts are a nice pass-time when he doesn’t feel like completing the mountain of paperwork stacked up on his desk. While you aren’t the most expressive person which may lead to some acts come off as dull, he finds amusement in how your personality contradicts your occupation.

⭑ A bit concerned when he spots you walking around the large ship without any supervision on multiple occasions, but it’s not his place to ask and you don’t look distressed or anything (not that you ever do.) However, he’ll order some cloud knights to keep a close eye on you just in case anyone were to try anything.

⭑ JING YUAN found out about your swordsmanship skills from Yanqing. It was when the young boy had returned from his training, utterly exhausted with his hair looking like had been attacked by a wind storm, that he is told about the teen with the feline features has some impressive swordsmanship.

⭑ That’s when his interest was piqued and he tries to interact with you. After performances he’ll give you some praise and ask how you’re doing. This, of course, makes you a bit nervous as this is the general of the luofu and here he his talking to you like you’re his kid,, so you do what you do best and hit him with one of your outlandish responses that makes him pause.

⭑ JING YUAN laughs thinking you’re pulling off one of your acts, but then you do it again and again and by the end of the interaction you have successfully made the general question if his age was getting to him.

⭑ Still, he will continue to praise you and ask how your day is after every performance, sometimes offering a game of starchess if you’re not too busy. His consistency is what gets you to trust him as he shows no ill-intent, especially after you grow closer to Yanqing behind the scenes as the boy constantly spars with you.

⭑ He doesn’t mind how frank and straightforward you can be. Like Aventurine, he’s worked with many different people and appreciates it. Your pokerface is also something he’ll praise you for as it’s very useful in combat and when playing against him.

⭑ When you open up about your past, JING YUAN can’t help the seed of anger that has been planted in him, and the more you share, the more that anger grows. He knows this world is cruel, but he had secretly hoped that it had been kinder to you. His relief is very evident on his features when you tell him that the man hadn’t been able to do anything relating to your body.

⭑ Will issue an order to a small group of cloud knights to find the man who had dared to put you through such a horrible experience. They won’t be the one to use him as a training target, however. That is for JING YUAN to enjoy. Oh, don’t mind him. Something important came up. Don’t worry, he’ll be back soon. You just enjoy your tea and sweets.

⭑ Speaking of tea and sweets, JING YUAN will always be down for tea time with youHe’ll try to clear at least a nice period in the afternoon to dedicate it to tea time with you. It becomes a tea party as Yanqing join you both sometimes. Takes tea time very seriously and will pause whatever he’s doing to attend. Clock strikes tea time? He’s leaving mid-conversation.

⭑ Cat naps!! It’s a big pile of you, him, mimi, and sometimes Yanqing, all curled up together and slumbering peacefully under the warm sun. He’ll use the excuse of keeping an eye on you when you’re napping just so he can nap as well. He indulges your cat instincts / traits a lot (sometimes you think he’s secretly a cat, too.)

⭑ Finds the fact that you’re very clumsy with machines very funny but also surprising. You’re so skilled with your blade and you perform such intricate acts and tricks that take years go master yet you struggle using a vacuum?? It’s a pretty bad case especially because the luofu is very mechanical-machinery reliant, so if anything randomly breaks, JING YUAN will just sigh as he knows it’s most likely you.

⭑ He won’t always be there to do the talking for you, but he’ll do his best. Plus, not many people will chat with you when the general is around. They’d either be too intimidated or just think it’s not in their place. If you ever wish to avoid social interaction, just stick next to him.

"Animals can also express their feelings. If you listen carefully, you can tell what state they are in. For a kitty, 'Meow~' means they are much happier than 'Meow meow meow!', and in that situation, you can pet them as much as you want and they won't run away."

"Hmm… is that so? Well, mimi makes more of a 'Meow… meow meow meow!' noise when I pet her. What emotion does that convey?"

⭑ This man does not interact with anyone, so how you two became close is still a mystery to the other stellaron hunters. Still, it’s clear that you both have some sort of bond that’s inseparable.

⭑ Missions with the both of you is just comfortable silence. The two of you are like the social outcasts of any setting. Well, at least the missions are completed swiftly. Most of the time, the third person of the mission doesn’t even have to do anything in the combat department. You both just slice and dice.

⭑ There is no doing the talking for each other because nobody talks to you both, anyways. People are too intimidated to talk to you both with how doll-esque you seem and how scary he is. You both are social interaction repellents and it can be a bit annoying for some, but people like Silver Wolf love it.

⭑ You both bond over not being the best with technology and machinery. You both never rarely use your phones and therefore are victims of having your phones used by other people. You both really couldn’t care less.

⭑ BLADE will watch your performances whenever he isn’t busy with missions. If you want him to help you, it’ll take a bit of convincing, especially if it involves you being in enclosures like being in a glass box with water or something. During dangerous tricks like those he’s very focused so nothing bad happens. Would prefer if he was the one at risk instead of you,,,

⭑ If you want to spar with him, he’ll be hesitant. Yes, you’re good with your sword, but he’s much much more skilled and he’s worried he’ll accidentally hurt you. He’l mentor you, however. Teaching is fine, but sparring is a big nono.

⭑ Doesn’t really care much for your feline features. BLADE has seen a lot of hybrids in his time so yours are not a shocker. He’ll be considerate of any boundaries and will make sure people don’t touch your ears or tail of course, but he won’t treat you any differently than any other person.

⭑ Will drink tea with you occasionally but he won’t eat the sweet treats. Likes tea himself, so he’ll enjoy your little tea times. He’ll bring back new types of teas you have yet to try during missions. If he’s going back to the planet or if it’s nearby and you liked a specific type, he’ll buy it again in larger portions so you can drink as much as you want.

⭑ Opening up to him is like talking to a wall. He looks stoic as always on the outside but trust that on the inside he has already thought of over 100 ways to make that man’s life a living hell. Like Jing Yuan, he knows the world is cruel. He will simply be crueler. Doesn’t take long for him to find the man who had bought you, and that day Blade’s bounty is soaring with how big the increase is.

⭑ Not the best with comforting others but if you’re having a bad day because of the memories or feel icky or something BLADE will make sure everyone gives you space and lets you have your you time. Will prepare tea and a snack for you, too.

"I used to think that the golden sun and dark shadows of the night could never understand one another. But in you, I see a kind of strange complexity that has needlessly piqued my curiosity..."

"…mmn.."

⭑ Another one that attends your shows! The news of a rising feline-featured performed piqued his interest, and so on opening night for your first show he could be seen seated in the spectator seats up top.

⭑ Really enjoys how your stoic demeanor balances your dramatic acts. While he knows your lack of enthusiasm isn’t the most encouraging for people to return or interact, he appreciates how different it is from the other over the top performers that litter penacony. SUNDAY soon becomes a regular at your shows.

⭑ It was you who came up to him first. You simply wanted to thank him for his consistent attendance and constant support, but he soon swept you int conversation and no matter how many odd and bizarre responses you gave him, he always managed to adjust to keep the conversation going. You cannot win with him.

⭑ These back-stage / after-show conversations soon become almost as frequent as his attendance to your performances. Also, his frequent attendance does not go unnoticed and when news of the head of the oak family being seen during almost every performance goes viral your popularity skyrockets.

⭑ Have you ever thought of security work as a side-occupation? It was when SUNDAY was escorting you to call a taxi that he saw your swordsmanship in action. Your theatre borders some dangerous territory, but memes were usually taken care of. He now knew who dealt with him as he watched you obliterate the ones that appeared. It reassures him knowing that you can take care of yourself.

⭑ Everyone in his residence knows how serious tea time is. Servants are rushing around in the kitchens trying to prepare the perfect sweets and snacks. To prepare the tea just the way you both like it, hot enough for SUNDAY but cool enough for you. The poor servants’ stress levels are always through the roof when it’s tea time preparation, and you are blissfully unaware of it all. By the time you’re in sunday’s office or lounge, everything has already been prepared.

⭑ Just like you are intrigued by SUNDAY’s halovian features, he is intrigued by your feline features. When you both are close enough, he’ll let you preen his wings and you’ll let him groom your ears and tail. He’s much more fussy with you, however. The second he spots a stray strand of fur in his office, he’s demanding your presence so he can get rid of the rest of the loose fur. He’ll get even more fussy before your performances and will always do last-minute checks before you’re out on stage.

⭑ Another one that appreciates your honesty and how you always cut straight to the point. Can always rely on you to tell him what he needs when he needs it. Also, your attention to detail is very useful and sometimes he’ll ask of you to focus on certain people during a show and report back to him.

⭑ The second you begin to open up about your past, SUNDAY is right beside you reassuring you to take it slow especially when you tell him about the man you were sold to. He’s pissed, rightfully so, but during the moment he’s supportive and makes sure to make it very clear that you are not anything negative you say about yourself should you do so.

⭑ SUNDAY is very good at interrogations, and with THEIR ability he’ll know if that wretched scum lies to him. There is no justifying, there is no 'the past is past' — there is no redemption. Once the man admits all he has done, he will be rid of. Vanished off the face of the cosmos. Nobody will know anything about him.

⭑ He’ll help you practice for performances, but he won’t go up on stage with you. He’d rather watch from afar as he doesn’t want to steal the spotlight from you. Your show nights are all about you, and he’ll make sure of it. There will be no disturbances and no casualties.

⭑ Funds all of your performances. Buys you any and all equipment you want and need. Want to expand your theatre? Done and without any charge. SUNDAY is your number one supporter and defender !!

⭑ He doesn’t mind doing the talking for you, but he’ll try and encourage you to talk for yourself. It would do you good to indulge in some small talk and conversation every once in a while! But if you insist you don’t want to and just want to be left alone without conversation, he’ll understand and drop it.

"After the sun goes down, the desires hidden in people's hearts will rise to the surface... I mean— evening shows are spectacular. Should I reserve a ticket for you?"

"Ahaha, yes, please do reserve a ticket."

⭑ Was creeped out the moment he met you. You were so still and expressionless that he thought you were a doll until you suddenly rushed forward and beat ass. If he had a heart it would’ve definitely stopped.

⭑ BOOTHILL couldn’t deny your swordsmanship was praiseworthy, however. Your agility, your sharp cuts, everything about it was impressive for someone your age. He tried to praise you but you gave him that stoic look and blurted out the most random sentence he’s heard and walked away leaving him dazed.

⭑ It doesn’t matter if your shows are expensive or not, BOOTHILL WILL get himself a ticket just to be able to figure out what it is with you. Also, because the idea of your dull expressionless self doing magic tricks had him doubling over in laughter. However, he was surprised at how professional you were with every act and trick.

⭑ Managed to sneak backstage and looked around for you only to find you gone. Was disappointed because he really did want to praise you for your skill— well, now skills. And maybe wanted to know who the hell trained you and how you were so good for a teenager.  Oh well, there was always the next show.

⭑ Or, there was always that same night. Saving you from some creepy men who were trying to do Aeons know what was all it took for you to glue yourself to him and use him as your meat shield. Not that BOOTHILL minded, it was kinda of in his job description and his morals to protect innocent people, especially when they were on the younger side.

⭑ He’s still a bit creeped out by how you’re so.. doll. You follow him around like a reserved duckling. And it’s not just following him around until the end of his stay — no, he literally finds you grabbing onto his jacket as he makes his way to leave to complete another bounty. There’s no getting rid of you and he’s accepted that.

⭑ He’ll definitely tease you about your feline features and behaviors. Calls you a clingy cat and will buy you cat toys as jokes. If you get upset, he’ll quickly apologize and make it up to you by taking you to your favorite seafood restaurant and letting you get whatever you want. If you don’t mind the jokes, then you’ll have a pile of cat toys that grows with each month!

⭑ Didn’t understand why you’d always stand in the corner of his mechanic’s shop when he was getting upgrades or repaired. He though it was just some teenage shyness but then one night he watched you blow up a literal vacuum. Terrified of you messing with his wires while he’s asleep charging. He tried to help, but gave up and backed away when you proceeded to fry your phone because it overheated.

⭑ Finds it absolutely hilarious when you’re interacting with people. Whether it’s your brutal honesty when talking to others or just one of your flabbergasting sentences to get them to leave you alone, it’s all comedic gold to him. Until it’s targeted at him,,, then uhm,,, yeah,,, okay maybe it’s a bit funny but still,,,,,

⭑ BOOTHILL knows he can come off as intimidating, and he’ll use it to his advantage if you don’t want anyone to talk to you. If someone tries to push it, they’ll have a nice revolver in their face and a protective cyborg ready to shoot at any moment should they push it even more.

⭑ When you open up to him about your past, all he can feel is rage — so much so that his internal fans are whirring to cool him down. He immediately asks you if you remember his name, his appearance, anything. He’ll also comfort you if you feel bad or feel like it’s your fault, which it definitely isn’t.

⭑ Oh sorry, he just got a new bounty you can’t go on. It’s just too dangerous! Don’t worry, you stay and spend all his money like some spoiled teen if you want. He’ll be back soon, you just relax and have a little you time!!

⭑ Would love to take part in your performances. He’s cautious if he’s on stage, however, and will probably use a disguise so nobody notices him since he is a wanted man, after all. He doesn’t want to risk your safety because of his status. He has yet to find out you also have a rising bounty on your head because you’ve been spotted numerous times with him.

⭑ BOOTHILL doesn’t mind your little tea time as long as it doesn’t get in the way of important bounties and dangerous missions. Even if it does, he’ll just tell you to maybe change your schedule? He’ll take you to a nice tea shop to make up for it but please focus on the bounty so it can be over with and you’ll be safe,,,

⭑ Really wants to know how you do that teacup card trick,,,

"I'm not accustomed to expressing myself, but I consider myself a good listener. If you have any troubles, tell me. I'll guard your secrets."

"I don’t doubt ya, kid."

⭑ DAN HENG initially did not expect you to trust anyone quickly when you first joined the express. It takes one to know one, but he can tell rather quickly that you were cautious of everyone despite your poker face. He doesn’t talk too much with you, not that he gets the chance as you give your weird replies to everyone who tries to talk to you.

⭑ He doesn’t realize that you inviting him for tea time in your room is a privilege only he has until March complains about your 'favoritism'. He’ll ask you about it and you’ll confirm it. He won’t ask why but it’s nice to know you trust him more than anyone else.

⭑ You both are social outcasts 2.0. He’ll do most of the talking for you both, but if anyone else from the crew is present, especially March, then they’ll do the talking for you both. He’s also the only one to understand your random response and to this day nobody knows how he does it.

⭑ Just like he needs to tend to his vidyadhara traits, you need to tend to your feline ones. Doesn’t mind if you randomly start shedding but will get a bit bothered if you leave your shedded fur around in the archives. If it gets to much he’ll sit you down and comb through your tail and ears’ fur himself. Also, if you’re comfortable with it, please put in some data about your avatism in the archives.

⭑ DAN HENG doesn’t seem all that enthusiastic during your performances, but he does enjoy them. He’ll clap and give some words of encouragement, but he’s not full on beaming. He just doesn’t know how to properly show his support physically so he’ll show it with praise and giving you trinkets and things he thinks you would or could use.

⭑ Also doesn’t mind helping you with acts and performances, and it’s funny how the both of you have this deadpan poker face while doing the most dramatic over the top jaw dropping trick. You both have a bit of a reputation on some planets that you’ve publicly performed during free time on missions,,

⭑ DAN HENG, like Blade, isn’t the best at comforting people — he can barely comfort himself. He’s a bit emotionally awkward. Still, he’ll try his best to comfort you as you open up to him about your past. He’s upset, but never at you. He’ll pat your back comfortingly or let you hug him.

⭑ If there’s ever a mission where he lays eyes on that man should he still be alive, DAN HENG will act on your behalf. He just needs to keep his skills sharp, that’s all. WORLD CLEANSING DRAGON—

⭑ If you have nightmares, you’re always free to sleep next to him in the archives. He knows how bad nightmares can be as someone who has suffered from them, and if you get embarrassed because you think it’s childish due to your age, he’ll pretend to still be asleep when you enter his room late to snuggle next to him.

⭑ Your clumsiness with technology and machinery genuinely concerns him. He’ll try to keep as little tech in your room as possible and will supervise you whenever you do literally anything with objects of the sort so you don’t hurt yourself or anyone around.

⭑ There’s a lot of things DAN HENG doesn’t realize he’s doing unless someone points it out. How he orders dishes that have some fish in them so he can give them to you, how he always makes sure your tea is cool enough for your sensitive tongue, how he know when you’re upset or not just from your ears.

⭑ Doesn’t mind sparring with you, but he’ll go easy on you. If you want him to mentor you, he’ll take it very seriously. He wants to make sure that you’ll be able to defend yourself should anything happen. Yes, he knows your swordsmanship is impressive for your age, but he also knows that impressive does not equal safety every time. He may be a bit strict, but it’s for your wellbeing so please don’t get upset.

"Go to sleep, I still have some loose ends to tie up from work today... I still have to fix the vacuum cleaner I broke.."

"That’s the third one this month.."

⭑ Was a bit surprised when he entered his lecture to find a feline-featured teenager sitting front row staring at him with a dead look. Was a bit creeped out, but whatever. He was fully expecting you to drop out after the first class.

⭑ Was surprised once again when you showed up for the next lecture. And the one after and after and after. Not to mention you were diligent and observant. You noticed a lot of things and after you two grew close, he’s a bit intimidated by how much you know and notice.

⭑ Some of the other students hate you for it bcs you can easily snitch on them if he ever asked you to. They can never say anything about it because you either ignore them or VERITAS steps in and scolds them.

⭑ You’re like a therapy cat for him but not in a weird way. If you let him, VERITAS will study your case of avatism. With how cat-like you behave, he’ll do some tests like scratching your ears and petting you. Would also see your reaction to cat toys. Now, why do I say therapy cat? Because your purring calms him down always. Also you make him feel like a cat dad.

⭑ He’ll get annoyed if you freely shed all around. Will scold you every time and then expect you to groom yourself properly. If you don’t he’ll get all huffy and frustrated as he does it himself but he really doesn’t mind. He just puts up an act.

⭑ You both are a scary duo. Some people think you’ve gotten your frank and brutal tongue from VERITAS, but you were like that since young. Still, many firmly believe you got it from him. You needn’t worry about unecessary conversation — people are too scared either you or him will rip them a new one for even looking at you. (exaggeration)

⭑ And while many are intimidated and scared of you, getting easily offended at your lack of sugarcoated words, VERITAS appreciates how blunt you can be. Will tell other people to be like you and doesn’t care if they get offended LMFAO

⭑ Probably the one on this list that’s the biggest enjoyer of tea time. You’ll be working on your assignments and be’ll be grading others’ assignments while enjoying sweet snacks and tea. Either that, you both sit in comfortable silence, or you’re dropping all the latest gossip you’ve heard and things you’ve noticed about your classmates that he hasn’t.

⭑ Contrary to the popular belief of his students, VERITAS finds himself enjoying your magic tricks and performances. It takes skill to do what you do, and he has to give credit where it’s due. He won’t really help during your acts, but he’ll give his input and ideas on how to improve like a better angle or quicker actions.

⭑ Also, VERITAS would encourage you to better cultivate your swordsmanship! I’d like to think he has connections, so he’ll find you someone if you want a mentor. If not, then that’s fine too. He’ll remind you everyday to go train for at least an hour. He won’t force you if you don’t feel like it, of course. As long as you’re with him, he’ll be able to protect you anyways.

⭑ Also one of the not-so-good comforters on the list when you open up about your past. So instead, he’ll brutally degrade the man you were sold to until you feel better. He’s trying his best, please understand that. He’ll give you an awkward pet to the head to top it all off.

⭑ I feel like VERITAS wouldn’t do anything to the man physically. Instead, he’ll care for your skills and enhance them until you’re known across the cosmos. Be it as a scholar, a sword fighter, a performer, or something else. Because in his eyes, that’s the best revenge.

⭑ Should that man still be alive, he will see that the one he saw as nothing but a toy to use is now one of the brightest stars in the cosmos, known all throughout while he is rotting away like the scum bastard he is.

⭑ Now, VERITAS is very prideful with his favorite and best student and he supports you, but,,,, but what is this,,,,, how are you so horrible with technology and machinery???? Were you born yesterday??

⭑ Like Dan Heng, he’ll supervise you whenever you’re using anything that has tech and/or machinery in it. Almost got a heart attack when he saw you tinkering with something that piqued your interest on Herta’s space station — VERITAS genuinely thought you’d bring the end of the station by blowing it up.

⭑ Would implement things in divergent universe (domain based off of tea time, occurrence, etc.) that relates to you and he wouldn’t even realize it until Screwllum points it out to which he denies.

"Making tea looks simple on the surface, but it is actually quite complex. The quality of the tea leaves, the temperature of the water, the number of times to add water... Only when every variable is properly controlled can tea of the purest taste be brewed. Would you like a cup?"

"You truly are passionate in the art of tea making, hm? But, yes, I would like a cup."

[thoughtfulchaos773]

Claire is the mother Carmy has always wanted.

Claire is seen this season caring for young boys. She takes care of and successfully distracts a young boy to take a shot and putting a bone back in its place.

The scene where she fixes a bone - seems familiar? It's connected to the story in 2x02, Pasta, where Claire describes wanting to understand a young girl's injuries from a broken arm. She never said she was interested in fixing it, rather she wanted to understand it. Carmy's question about whether she wanted to fix it was projecting, hoping she could heal his childhood wounds.

If only Donna were as gentle and happy as Claire, who imagines fixing kids' injuries, maybe he'd be different. Maybe he could enjoy life more and be happier if he were taken care of.

From the beginning, Claire disarms carmy when he sees her smile. Something Donna barely did.

And she's known as Disarming Carmy in a few articles. I think the song "Disarm" from season 3 relates to Claire in the sense that her own happy disposition disarmed Carmy's wounded inner child, and it's what he hopes Donna could be.

"Disarm" by Smashing Pumpkins as played on 3x10 Forever

It's carmy hoping Claire heals his inner child the whole time. It's a song that has to do with our inner children wounded and attempting to find healing.

The relationship was never going to work because Carmy is stuck in the hope that he could have had a different childhood and that he could fix it in the present.

What solidifies this is Fak sharing stories of Carmy never being happy because of Donna and losing his childhood. Fake hopes in some way Claire could heal Carmy.

Claire, after giving it some thought or at least considering it, closes the book and informs the Faks that it's finished. There's a part of Claire that also wants to help heal Carmy's inner child wounds, but ultimately, he has to fix himself.

No woman could be his mother or babysitter.

Makes these two scenes all the more significant:

Take note of the two scenes where Chef Terry and Sydney are wearing scarves with lines. Even though Sydney calms Carmy, she firmly tells Carmy that she's not there to fix whatever inner damage he has. She is a peaceful figure in his life, but she's not the babysitter and calming influence Chef Terry was for Carmy. Sydney has her own problems and journey that Carmy has to understand and assist with as the series progresses.

There is something about the influence of women in Carmy's life and the connections he must make to grow. However, there's a line between using these women as a stepping stone towards growth and using these women as his source of inspiration. He has to heal his inner child to become the man he wants to be without relying on the women to babysit or care for him unequally.

"You gotta figure that parent shit out first"

-Joanna Calo

Tagging: @currymanganese @whenmemorydies @vacationship @fresaton @moodyeucalyptus @ambeauty

[parfaitblogs]

scared of my guitar ❀ s. reid x reader

in which you fall out of love, and he notices. 

pairing: spencer reid x reader genre: angst tags: established relationship. they suck at communicating. whole lot of nothing again why can't i write guys. no happy ending.  word count: 1.2k a/n: this is for the girls who are the problem in their relationships!! i see u!! i hear u!!! thank u olivia rodrigo for representing us.

also posted here on my ao3 !

You were perhaps the most awful and cruel person in the world.

Those were the self-deprecating thoughts you had every single night, morning, and every hour in between. Thoughts you have been having for a month now, and thoughts you were praying would go away. Because the longer you have them, the more solidified they become in your brain, and the closer you get to knowing you need to address them. With him.

The man currently in your kitchen, making two separate cups of tea, like he did every night he was home. Putting all his love and care into making it the way you like, the way you had taught him. Which, truthfully, didn't take long to teach him — he was a fast learner. Always taking the first sip and telling you if it was still too hot to drink, burning his own mouth and allowing you to scold him for it. A nighttime routine that went on for as long as you could remember. 

But it wasn't enough.

You knew he'd crack you open eventually. He didn't need to be a profiler to read you — he knew more about you than you sometimes thought you knew about yourself. He used to coax you to open up to him about past traumas, never going too far, always pushing just enough to get you to share what you needed to. He was sometimes so in tune with your emotions you wondered if he had crawled into your brain and set up camp the day you two met. 

But no, that was just Spencer. 

The first time he asked if something was wrong was three months ago. He had come home from a particularly long case, and you didn't greet him at the door with the same enthusiasm you usually did. Sure, you were happy, but there was a certain spark behind your eyes missing. But it was two in the morning, and you were technically exhausted, so you were able to blame it on that. He was skeptical, but he knew you, and he knew not to push it. 

The second time he confronted you, you had spent an entire week without spending time with him. You both worked full time, but you also always made time for each other. Whether that be as planned as a Friday night movie, or as simple as picking the other up from work. But you had successfully avoided him outside of simple 'good morning's' and 'good night's'. 

He had sat you down the following Tuesday night, and asked if things between you two were okay. You lied, and said yes, and you watched him become even more suspicious than the time before. He didn't believe you. Again, he didn't push it. 

A small part of you wished he would've. Maybe you could've had the difficult conversation, and it would be over, and you'd be sitting on your couch with a shattered heart over a broken relationship, instead of a shattered heart over one that still exists. 

You knew it was coming when he had sat down with the teas, placing both of them on the coffee table, and you two sitting in an awkward silence for a few moments. 

You lifted your head to glance at him, expecting him to be staring at you, but he wasn't. His eyes, instead, trained on the two coffee mugs, cogs turning in his brain. A sight — watching him think — that used to bring you so much joy, now filling your stomach with an uncomfortable sense of anxiety. 

You opened your mouth to speak, but he cut you off before you could, his gaze unwavering from the mugs. 

"What's wrong?" 

What a layered question, you thought, bitterly. Because what wasn't wrong? 

You wanted to deflect it, tell him nothing, again, say you were fine. But with how serious he seemed, you decided against it. He wouldn't let that pass this time.

"I don't know," you settled on saying, voice shaky, unsure how to actually say what you were feeling. 

He slowly nodded his head, his Adam's apple bobbing as he swallowed. "Can you try to know, please?"

He still wasn't looking at you.

You inhaled, eyes fluttering as you attempted to regain your emotions, blinking away the tears filling them already. God, confrontation was hard. 

When you were silent for probably too many minutes, he turned his head to look at you, the sight cracking right down the centre of your heart. 

He wasn't sad looking, per se. Exhausted was probably the better word for it. His eyes devoid of most emotion, his naturally downturned lips frowning further. And that wasn't even the most painful part of it. No, it was the barely audible,

"You don't love me anymore, do you?"

His voice impossibly small, eyes blinking a few times, as if he was doing what you had done and fighting back his own tears. If somebody had shoved a knife in your abdomen fifty times over, twisting it every time, you decided it would hurt less than that.

You couldn't find an answer, your lips parting and closing three or four times as you wracked your brain for something — anything — to say that would take that expression off his face. But anything like that would be a lie, and he would see right through it. You knew that.

So, you settled on a small shake of your head, averting your eyes for your own sake. 

He didn't say anything; simply inhaled sharply and nodded his own head, fingers flexing and stretching against each other in a nervous habit you had noticed what felt like years ago. 

"How long?" he then asked, and you, for the umpteenth time that night, wanted to lie. 

But you didn't. "I had my first doubt four months ago," you said. "But three months ago."

"And you waited four months to tell me?" his voice was impossibly strained. 

You swallowed the lump in your throat. "I didn't know if it was just a fleeting thought because you weren't home or not."

"Right," he answered, hands running down his face, index fingers digging into his eyes. "So then you waited three months after you realised?"

"I didn't know how to bring it up."

You could see the frustration slowly settling in his chest, his eyebrows furrowing in confusion.

"Spencer—"

"—No," he cut you off, shooting a bullet through your heart as his eyes fluttered shut, and he paused, swallowing back what you figured would be another sob. And you couldn't even blame him. "No, don't—don't justify it. Please. You strung me along for three months?" 

Yes, you did. And you felt awful, staring at him as he drummed his fingers against his thighs; an anxious tic, his eyes settling back on your body. 

"I'm sorry."

It was a pathetic apology, as if it could take back the past three months of interactions he was no doubt overanalysing inside his brain. It couldn't. You knew that, he knew that. 

"Why did you stay?" he finally asked after an eternally long silence between you two.

"I was scared," you whispered. Not intentionally — that's just how small your voice comes out, and it's embarrassing. 

"Of what?"

"Regretting it."

He let out a sigh, nodding his head. He could at least understand that. "I wish you would've told me."

"Me too."

More silence, more anxious heart-beating and more uncomfortable eye contact to each other. 

"I'm sorry," you repeat, breaking the silence. 

He merely nodded his head, eyes searching over your face for a few more seconds, before he stood up, picking up his phone from the coffee table and pocketing it. 

"Yeah," he said, quietly. "So am I."

your reblogs and replies are always appreciated dearly ♡

[joelmillergirl]

Illicit Arrangement- Joel Miller

Part 2 of Forbidden From You

Word count: 2,762

Warnings: anal play, threats of anal, bondage, clothed cock riding, cockwarming, p in v, creampie, breeding kink, degradation, praise, hard sex, reader is able to be picked up!

Authors Note: So many people asked for a part 2, so I delivered. Thank you!! Tags: @emisprocrastinating @macaroni676 @sunsfrend

︵‿︵‿୨♡୧‿︵‿︵

"Whoops." Joel muttered, gesturing to the front door where his younger brother had finally come to the realisation.

A year had passed since Tommy had found out about your secret arrangement with his older brother. He had successfully avoided you for two weeks in what you assumed was anger but had later found out was actually mortification.

You had cornered Tommy in his own house, almost in tears, as you demanded an explanation and begged for approval. After a long, awkward conversation, Tommy agreed that he was in no place to be upset and that he did support you; it was just not in his cards to find out the way he did.

The secret had come out; practically everyone knew now about the relationship you had with Joel, or lack of thereof. You weren’t an official couple, yet you might’ve well have been. Joel refused to label what you had- a decision he made that drove you to insanity. One night, he had come home visibly annoyed, mumbling under his breath about his brother.

“You see, Joel.” Tommy slurred, slapping his hand on his brothers’ back. “I’ve known her for years, she’s like my little sister, like my little chick.”

Joel frowned, leaning away from Tommy to look at him, “Your… Chick?”

“It’s a baby bird,” Tommy clarified before continuing, “I told ya to keep away from her, your broody self compared to her sweet self… didn’t want you breaking her heart. But you’re together now-“

“Uh, we’re not-“ Joel tried to argue.

Tommy held up his hand, silencing an angry looking Joel, “You’re together now, and I have to accept it. Don’t break her heart, Joel.” His tone, previously lighthearted and slurred, now changed into a more serious tone, “I’ll never forgive you if you hurt her.”

Guilt had seemed to become an overwhelming part of your days, always questioning Joel's moves, wondering whether or not he wanted you for sex or something deeper. You confided in Maria about it but felt even guiltier when you questioned whether or not she'd tell Tommy about it as well.

You were sitting outside with Joel, a glass of rich wine in your hand, as the sun started setting, the final colours of the day painted across the darkening sky, a mixture of orange, pink, and light reds. Not many people came out this time of day; everyone in their houses were eating, or debriefing after a day of patrols. A picture-perfect environment for you.

Joel was silent next to you, his breath coming in slowly, his eyes closing for a few seconds longer every time he blinked, pure serenity. "What are we?" You break the silence, asking the question you had yearned to ask for months- a question you knew he'd try his best to avoid.

He sighed deeply, finishing his drink in one go, electing to stay staring at the sky. "Must we label it?" He finally answered, glancing at you from the corner of his eye.

You lean back, closing your eyes for a moment. "I want there to be a label. I don't know how to... be around you, what to refer to you as."

Joel listened to you, watching as the painted colours slowly started to fade, a dark new colour instead enveloping the sky. "Honey, I just don't understand the label thing." He admitted, "Why can't we just be what we are and leave it at that?"

"I wanna be more." You say, clutching onto the glass a little tighter, "It'll be just like how we are right now, but I'd get to call you my boyfriend. Flaunt you a little, I don't know." You mumble, sighing.

Joel chuckled quietly, "That's what you wanna do? Flaunt me? How entertaining, a young woman flaunting about her old boyfriend. Bet Jackson would be delighted."

You furrow your eyebrows, turning to face him. "Is that why you haven't wanted to be official? Because you're embarrassed you're with someone younger than you?"

The air around you was stale, your question lingered in the silent air for a few seconds. Joel shook his head slowly. "More so embarrassed for you. You don't wanna be stuck with me. Plenty of fellas here younger, more agile."

You stand up suddenly, needing to move only a step until you were right by his side. Your nails brushed against his beard, the usual deep brown now tainted with little grey streaks. "Don't want them. You're only a few years older than me, Joel... I don't want anyone else."

Joel looked up at you, his fingers stretching out from where they lay on his lap, "Just me?"

"Just you." You nod, leaning down to kiss him. Your noses brushed against each other for a second, before you twisted your face, connecting with him as your lips met. One kiss, then two, then three. The soft touches slowly turning into something more desperate.

He stood up, his lips never leaving yours as he wrapped his hands around your ass, lifting you up. "Yep," He chuckled, walking you into the house, "Definitely gettin' old."

He took you up into the bedroom, a place you were familiar with now. You were imprinted in everything, your scent on the pillows, your books on the bedside tables, bits of décor from your house (that you still technically lived in). Joel placed you down onto his bed, standing up straight as you began stripping your clothes, pushing yourself up onto your knees as Joel stood at the foot of the mattress, watching you. Bare and vulnerable, you knelt in front of him, your hands cautiously reaching out to his belt.

He grabbed your hands when you were close enough, shaking his head. With his free hand, he loosened it himself, pulling it out of the loopholes all whilst holding steady eye contact with you. With his belt in one hand and your hands in his other, he stepped a little closer, wrapping the belt around your wrists, effectively tying your hands together.

"Tight?" He asked, looking at you softly.

You shake your head, "Perfect."

"I'm gonna have you, little girl. All for myself, you understand?" He asked, pushing you back so you lay looking up at him. You could only nod, his words sending a spark down to your already aching cunt, a wave of arousal accumulating near your entrance. His shirt was taken off first, haphazardly thrown onto the floor beside him, followed by his jeans and eventually his boxers. His cock was already hard, the tip red and glistening with pre-come.

Your legs automatically spread as he knelt between them, the wide length of him causing your legs to part in a way that had your muscles struggling. He carefully moved your bound hands above your head, pressing down on them to indicate not to move them before his hand moved to gently grasp your thigh, squeezing it before he dragged his cock down the slit of your pussy.

The stretch was something you had gotten used to, every time he filled you up there was still some slight discomfort that lingered for a moment before he started moving. He talked you through it every time, whispering in your ear and massaging your skin as he praised you. Tonight the air was different. Once he was settled deep inside of you, he began fucking you, his hips connecting to your skin roughly, the power behind it shoving you further up the bed.

His hands met your tied ones, using them to keep himself up, his grunts reaching your ears over your loud moans. "Don't know what I was thinkin'." Joel muttered, looking down at where you were connected, his balls now slapping against your ass. "I've ruined you, couldn't take another dick after mine, could ya?"

"No." You moan, your eyes shutting closed as his hand moved from your hip down to your clit, circling it gently. Joel watched you intently, his thrusts not ceasing as he grunted above you. Suddenly he grabbed your legs, pushing them up to your chest, sliding deeper inside you.

He looked down again, suddenly groaning out. "Look at ya takin' me," He whispered, "Think you could take me in here?" His fingers circled your asshole, gently pushing the tip of his thumb inside. "I won't do it, not yet."

His consistent thrusts and the slow drawl in your ear set you off, your orgasm hitting you without warning. Your clenched around his cock, your arms straining above your head as you came, words of approval spilling out of your mouth. Joel slowed his thrusts down, slowly fucking into you now as he grew closer to his own orgasm.

"So good." Joel whispered, pulling your legs to wrap around his waist as he came, pushing himself into you as far as he could, moving down so he could kiss you. After untying your hands and cleaning you up, you lay side by side. Similar thoughts running through your minds as the still environment around you calmed you down.

The new arrangement between you and Joel was noticeable, you were the main talk of the town. You now held his hand and kissed him in public, and apart from the overdramatic gagging that came from Tommy, no one had a problem with it.

One evening, you were sitting at Jackson's lively bar, waiting for Joel to meet you after his patrol. You were drinking your drink when you heard someone clear their throat behind you.

"Mikey." You say, praying that you got his name right.

Mikey nodded, gesturing to the seat next to you, "Good to see you again. Could I sit?"

You slowly nod, watching him as he sat down, "You can until Joel gets here, just waiting for him."

"Yes, I'm kinda here to talk about him... And you," Mikey said, "You guys are dating, right?"

His question didn't surprise you, whilst no one seemed to care you were dating Joel, people still went out of their way to ask, usually a neutral expression on their face. A judgemental expression was instead plastered across the mans' across you, "Yep." You nod.

Mikey hummed, looking away for a moment. "Isn't he a bit old?

You smile, "Only a few years older than you and I. Don't really see the issue."

In a room full of people you really felt alone, you looked around, trying to find a face that was familiar enough to go to. Mikey hummed beside you, tapping his fingers against the wood for a few seconds. "Guess I'm just wondering why you chose him and not me. As in, did I do anything?

Your lips pull into a thin line, "It has nothing to do with you. Tommy set up that date not knowing that... I wasn't interested."

Just as Mikey was about to reply, a warm hand was placed on your shoulder, "Mikey." Joel greeted, squeezing your flesh gently. "Gonna go home, honey?'

"Yes, "You quickly say, taking Joel's hand as you stand up, "Bye, Mikey." With Joel hanging onto you, you quickly walk out the bar, mumbling under your breath as you navigate your way back to his house.

"What did he want?" Joel asked from behind you, pulling on your hand slightly in an attempt to slow down your fast paced strives.

You shake your head, "I didn't want to go on that date in the first place with him. Just wanted to get Tommy off my back."

Within a few minutes you were at his front steps, and you made your way inside, finally letting go of Joel's hand as you shrugged off your coat and boots. Then, you were being steered into the living room, where the embers of last nights fire were still glowing. "Was he botherin' you?" Joel asked, sitting down beside you on the couch.

You look over at him, his jeans straining against his thighs as he leant back against the soft material behind him. "Asked if we were dating," You start, "Asked why I chose you instead of him."

Joel nodded slowly, holding his gaze with yours, "And?" He asked, elaborating when you stayed quiet, "Why did you choose me instead of him?"

You started thinking about him; really thinking about the things that made him, him. Innocent thoughts at first, as simple as the crease in his forehead as he laughed, or the way he fiddled with his fingers when he was anxious. But naturally, you started thinking about the dirtier thoughts. The way his fingers curled inside you, how just one of his fingers were the equivalent to two of yours. How he moaned when you were taking him in your mouth. The thoughts had you tightening your thighs together, something he picked up on quickly.

"C'mere." He muttered, spreading his legs a little wider and angling his pelvis up slightly, patting his lap.

Your cheeks flushed pink, hesitantly kneeling up before you brought one of your legs over his furthest thigh. Impatient at your slow pace, Joel's large hands grabbed your hips and suddenly pulled you so you were sat flush against him, effectively straddling him. The contact alone felt heavenly, the feeling of his growing cock below your cunt. Your hands reach out to grab his broad shoulders, shifting up gently before moving back down on him.

“Yeah? You wanna ride my cock like this?” Joel asked gruffly, leaning up and wrapping his arms around your back. With this new angle, he nuzzled his face in the crook of your neck, pressing his lips against your soft skin gently. You moan, tilting your head to the side to allow him more access, all while starting to move your hips against him. 

“Want to feel you inside me.” You sighed, leaning your chest against his. Joel’s hands moved up and down your body, squeezing the flesh of your ass before coming to palm your clothed breasts, his lips leaving small kisses anywhere he could reach in his position. You lifted your hands, tugging your shirt off, soon followed by your bra.

You grinded against him, the rough material of his denim mixed with his hard cock hitting your clit with every thrust. Joel's hands moved to your hips, rocking you harder against him. He groaned into your ear, his hips moving upwards in their own accord. You sat up straight, leaning back onto his knees as he moved you.

Your orgasm was creeping up on you, your legs beginning to shake as you freely moaned, desperate to come. Then you were being pulled up away from him, your orgasm gone as quick as it had started, you groan in frustration, "Joel! What're you doing?"

He sat up and helped you stand up, undoeing your jeans, shoving them down your legs. You moved his hands away, taking off your own underwear as you watched you. "Please." You begged.

Joel looked at you calmly, pushing his jeans down to his ankles and pulling himself out of his boxers, gesturing for you to straddle him again. "Wanna see how long you can sit-" He gripped your hips and pulled you down, dragging his cock through your slick before pushing inside of you, "Still." He finished, allowing you to sit down on him as slow as you needed.

Once you were sitting down, completely filled with him, Joel squeezed your flesh, flexing his hips into you for a moment, "Don't move." He ordered, slapping the side of your thigh gently as he leant back, exhaling deeply. You looked at him unamused, resting your hands on your thighs. Joel smiled beneath you, opening his eyes slightly, "'S okay, baby. Doin' good." He praised you, moving his hands up your thighs, lingering on your hands for a second before moving up, and squeezing your breasts.

Joel slowly started moving, flexing his hips into you, the sensation almost becoming unbearable. Yet, you stayed still, instead choosing to clench around him, a wicked smile on your face. He groaned loudly, thrusting up into you roughly as he opened his eyes fully, shaking his head at you, "Little minx."

"Please." You beg again, despite everything, you continued to be still on top of him. Joel shifted, placing his feet square onto the ground and putting his hands under your ass before he started fucking up into you, setting an unforgiving pace instantly. The change from nothing to this, took you by surprise, and you reached out to grab his shoulders to balance yourself as Joel maneuvered you to meet his thrusts, bouncing you on his cock.

Given the fact that Joel had denied you an orgasm already, you were close to another in a record time, your thighs clenching around his. You were moaning in his ear as you came, your pussy clenching down on him. Joel followed soon after, pushing into you weakly, "Good girl." He groaned, rubbing your back gently. "That why you chose me?"

[starhvney]

𝐅𝐈𝐑𝐄 𝐃𝐑𝐈𝐋𝐋

𝐏𝐀𝐈𝐑𝐈𝐍𝐆: mystreet garroth x fem!reader

𝐒𝐔𝐌𝐌𝐀𝐑𝐘: your boyfriend finally pursues a career that he chose for himself, so to show him your support you surprise him at his training.

𝐓𝐀𝐆𝐒: fluff, firefighter garroth guys firefighter garroth this is in fact not a drill, established relationship

𝐂𝐖: none!

𝐀/𝐍: this fic is based off of @artists-who-rarely-draws hc that garroth would be a firefighter in the mys universe! aren’t firefighters just sooo >>>

𝐌𝐀𝐒𝐓𝐄𝐑𝐋𝐈𝐒𝐓

you were so happy for garroth, nothing but overwhelming support for him was in your heart as he finally was able to pursue something he truly wanted to do for a career. after zane had officially taken the reins of the ro’meave corporation, your boyfriend had immediately enrolled in a firefighting training academy.

he had mentioned his interest in the career path before, but you didn’t realize just how passionate about it he was until he excitedly came home from the first day of the academy, rambling about how well he did.

it warmed your heart, the childlike excitement in his eyes when he detailed the training he went through every day. it was so different from his time in college, when he told you he was majoring in business with a disinterested shrug and a dull look in his eyes.

last week, as you and garroth sat on your couch for your movie night date, you saw that the pd fire academy was asking for volunteers for their upcoming rescue drill. from the corner of your eye you glanced at him, debating whether you should bring it up or not. he had been particularly focused on the rom-com that played, the reflection of the brightly colored screen lighting up his eyes. on a whim, you applied to volunteer without saying a peep, turning your phone off and snuggling up to him with a smirk on your face.

this morning as he asked you what your plans were for the day as usual, you briefly shrugged off the question with an excuse of running a few errands. he gave you a small confused look but shrugged it off, leaning down to kiss you and leaving in his cargos, boots, and the pd fire department shirt that hugged onto his muscles that seemingly continued to grow by the day.

yes, you were very supportive of his career choice.

now, a few hours later, you find yourself in a dim building, the room illuminated by the orange lights shining into the “smoke” that the fog machines dispersed. not only did it look like the building was on fire, but the lack of ac in the summer heat added to the ambiance, and had you slightly regretting your decision. you looked down at the tag that they had given you before escorting you to your spot, telling you to lay limp until you were successfully “rescued”.

legs disabled from fallen debris, half-conscious. critical condition.

you lay there for quite a while, wondering if garroth would even be the one to get you. your doubts are thankfully squandered when you hear him, calling out a code call to presumably another fireman. his familiar footsteps turn into the room you’re in, and you hear his breath satisfyingly hitch in his throat before a disbelieving huff follows. 

quickly, you clamp your eyes all the way shut, ignoring the tempting urge to smile as your plan sets in place.

“victim, victim, victim!” his deep voice calls, the noise of the thick material of his uniform meets your ears as he slides on his knees next to you. 

“she’s light,” he calls to the other pair of heavy footfalls that enter the room. “find an exit, i got her.”

you crack open your eyes, turning your head and looking up at him as a cheeky smile threatens to break on your lips. for just a split moment he narrows his eyes as they meet yours, tongue rolling against the inside of his cheek as he fights off his own urge to smile.

“…errands, huh,” he mutters under his breath, shaking his head as he leans forward to read the tag on your shirt. he snaps right back into his profession, one of his hands reaching to grab your shoulder in a reassuring gloved grip. “you’re going to be okay. i’m gonna get you out here safe.”

a part of you wants to laugh at how serious he suddenly became, but through your want to tease him you instead found yourself repressing a giddy giggle. the summer heat was most definitely affecting him through the heavy layers of his gear, as a sheen of sweat covered his face and stuck the small bit of his golden hair coming out of his helmet to his forehead. 

you only get to admire him for a moment, before he quickly shifts his knee to part your legs, one of his hands grabbing onto your thigh and hitching it up. at the same time, he easily gathers both of your wrists into his other hand, using it to lift your torso off of the ground. he smoothly ducks his head under your shoulder, lifting you up and using his own shoulder to hold you on his back.

there's not even a grunt heard from his lips, but his heavy breaths brush against your arm as he uses one hand to pin your hand across his chest and to your leg, freeing his other hand. he has always been strong, but the extra training he has put in lately gave him an insane boost. through the material that covered him, you could still feel the bulk of his muscles from underneath you as he toted you through the building.

it was amazing, how easy he made it look. you found yourself back outside in seconds, having to close your eyes again from the sudden bright sun reflecting into your eyes. he held you so firmly on top of him that you barely moved as he jogged you out to one of the stretchers set up outside, sliding you down onto the material. 

he pauses for a second, his lips twitching as he pats your legs twice. “i’ll talk to you about this when i’m done,” is what he says without words, begrudgingly turning to run back into the building with another huff.

one of the supervisors lets you get up, thanking you for volunteering and giving you a water to rehydrate from the stuffy room you were stuck in. it’s only about fifteen more minutes of waiting before the rest of the volunteers are retrieved and the drill is over. garroth quickly walks your way as soon as he spots you again, pulling off his helmet and shaking out his pressed-down hair. his jacket has been shrugged off now, red suspenders hanging down on his cargos and his black shirt damp from sweat.

“and… why did you not think to mention this to me?” he asks, raising an accusatory brow and pulling you into his embrace.

“i wanted to see you in action. besides, if i told you, you might’ve chosen favorites.”

“hmm,” he hums lowly, rolling his eyes as he leans down to press a kiss against your forehead. “i would argue against that, but even for a drill i’d save you first.”

“ro’meave! quit flirting with your girl over there and get your ass over here! we still have to debrief.”

“yes, sir!” he calls back, turning to you with a sheepish smile as he tucks his chin down, looking at you through his lashes.

“i’ll see you in a sec, sweetheart. and don’t leave, you still have some explaining to do.”

©starhvney, 2024. please do not steal or repost my works as your own.

[hanfourz]

— l.rw thought [s]

🪼 - i am very much still here.... riwoo get out my head (and get in my bed)

pairing: riwoo x reader ・genre: smut, established relationship ・MDNI!!!!!

wc: 874・warnings: making out/kissing, fingering

[ network: @onedoornet ]

thinking abt getting all dressed up and going to an event together. as soon as you meet him at your door when he picks you up, he knows he's done for. you look absolutely to die for, he swears he starts salivating. you see his eyes scan over you figure and back up to your face like three times before he actually says something. he gets all nervous, making you giggle because now he's clearing his throat and tripping over his words. you tell him he looks good too but the tone in your voice makes him shiver.

the whole event y'all are connected at the hip, where he goes you go and vice versa. that part isn't uncommon for you two though. any time you're at an event together, you stick like glue. what is out of the ordinary is how touchy riwoo has been the whole night. he usually likes to keep a hand on you whether it's around your waist or resting on the small of your back. but tonight feels different, his touches more purposeful and lingering. an arm wrapped firmly around your hips, fingers splayed over your thigh when you're sat next to each other, hand grazing down your spine every so often. you don't know if he's actually trying to get you riled up or not but it's working and by the end of the night you're more than hot and bothered.

when you two finally say all your goodbyes, it takes every ounce of your self control to not drag him out the venue. and it takes you even more self control to not tell the driver to pull over when you two on on your way back home. riwoo doesn't make it any easier on you either, his dainty hands rubbing your thigh and his fingers drawing patterns that leave goosebumps. you think you're practically vibrating with need by the time you get to the hotel. and you're almost positive riwoo can tell by now, every time he tries to start a conversation you seem barely focused on the words coming out his mouth and more on the way his lips are moving and how pretty they look and how good they'd feel on- you look away before you jump across the seat. he smirks to himself, picking up on all your cues. he feels a little smug knowing you're just as affected because truthfully he's been thinking about getting you out your clothes pretty much the entire time.

you two are silent on your way through the very pristine lobby of the hotel, only the sounds of your shoes on the tile and the low murmurs of the late night staff who pay you no mind. none of that really matters to you though when riwoo laces his fingers through yours and all but drags you to the elevators. as soon as the doors close, you scan around and hope to not spot a camera. unfortunately you do but you don't let it deter you as you step closer into your pretty boyfriends space. he looks slightly panicked as you corner him and he whispers about the cameras. you just shrug as a tiny smirk plays on your lips. he sucks in a sharp breath when you're pressed chest to chest and his hands are immediately grabbing at your hips. when you press your mouth to his, he almost moans fully sinking into the kiss. it's heated and rushed as your arms wrap around his shoulders and you pull him in closer. your whimper into his mouth and he feels hot all over. your hands tangle into his hair and his caress your sides.

when the elevator dings, you both pull away hastily and try to fix yourselves. luckily there's no one there when the doors open and you two practically sprint to your room, him fumbling slightly with the keycard while your hands find purchase on his waist. as soon as you've successfully shut the door, you're back on each other. he's murmuring about how beautiful you are between kisses and you just hum at his words, more concerned currently with getting his suit jacket off. he chuckles breathily at your impatience before taking it off, throwing it somewhere in the room. your hands are grabbing at his waist again, pushing him back towards the bed. he stumbles back, collapsing onto the sheets and letting out a little noise of shock when you're immediately climbing over him. you start kissing down his neck, undoing his buttons while he starts to take off his tie. you pull away to catch your breath and start to undress yourself as he watches, swollen lips slightly parted. once you've both rid yourself of your clothes, you run your hands over his smooth skin. you tell him how pretty he is and watch a blush spread over his neck. his hands start to roam from your hips to your chest, fondling your tits and causing you to sigh into his touch. when you start to grind yourself on top of him, he lets out a breathy moan. soon enough, you're completely naked and riding him within an inch of his life while his fingers work wonders over your clit.

[iammissingautumn]

I think the thing about caring about Johnny and Ralph’s relationship is like. The entire point is that they’re Not Great. Like idk to me there’s quintessential they have a terribly hard start of their relationship (first three years) because Johnny can’t get used to the pain he’s in and he can’t relax enough to feel comfortable being taken care of. Ralph must take care of Johnny, he doesn’t have to but he would never forgive himself if Johnny got more hurt. This is why after Johnny’s escape attempt Ralph opens up what he allows to happen. Johnny is captive so long as he has the ability to tell on Ralph to an authority. Ralph is never going to be normal, he is both being traumatized by god and traumatized by his own actions. He can’t connect with other people. And honestly Johnny can’t connect with him! But really by the time he wants not to see and Ralph helps him achieve that successfully there is an ability for them to look at each other as equals. Johnny feels less agro as he loses his fight and learns how much bigger this is than just Ralph. Johnny sees that this is not Ralph on a power trip or trying to hurt him, which with what trauma he’s going thru via the kidnapping of course he hates Ralph as long as he does. But also. he sees Ralph is soft to him for years. I think the entire pull of their relationships, whether they want to be close together or kiss or whatever the other freaks (/aff) who like this game think. The entire pull is that they can’t ever be as close as they feel. There is always something outside of them that is there to hurt them. That has impacted their lives so much no matter how close they get there is a barrier, and at the same time that barrier is what brings them closer. The days spent eating dinner in Ralph’s kitchen. Nights where Johnny sleeps in the living room while Ralph is in his bedroom. afternoons where they’re watching tv together.

They fall into a lull more intimate than most lovers or friends or family. They are in a lull where they are damned by the same thing, and there is no where else to turn. Ralph is too fucked up to have made any choice besides kidnapping Johnny. Johnny was just like anyone else, he cared. But Ralph couldn’t make connections, and that at the end of the day is why they’re so connected. After years of both of them breaking they’re able to have some sort of mutuality.

Or you can just see it as Ralph’s fucked up lima syndrome adventure ft. stolkholm i suppose i can’t control you

[umishiqu]

☀️ kalim al-asim development analysis (post book 7 chapter 9)

This is an entire Kalim analysis based off of his development in Book 7 and interpreting scenes before Book 7 accordingly. This means there will be spoilers from the JPN twst servers, so be warned! There’s a lot of stuff to get through, but there’s also a lot of opinions about Kalim that didn’t actually reflect his character that we need to get through as well, but thankfully I’ve explained a bit of that in another analysis. I’ll have it linked in the necessary section but I also copy-pasted that post into this one as well. Without further ado, let’s begin!

A common conversation between many Kalim fans is whether Kalim would develop into a person who resolves to help others no matter what and learns how to help others without inconveniencing someone else, or if he would develop into a person who talks freely about his actual thoughts and feelings regarding precarious situations and dislikes about others. There was evidence for both of these in canon as Kalim develops towards being a person who can successfully throw a parade by himself, tie his headband himself, and gain independence. Overall, would this development go towards him being an asset others can use and rely on to do things for him, or would this development go towards him being his own asset and asserting his own perspective on the world around him through actions? For example, he gave money to Ramshackle to improve their utilities and upkeep the maintenance, but is the outcome that results of it to improve status using “charisma” or is it to improve the well-being of others using “charisma”? This conversation is pretty much summed up by Leona in Book 6:

So you can see why it was such a big deal for this to have been answered in Book 7. Before we get into extrapolating all of the scenes that build up towards Kalim’s development in Book 7, let’s talk about his development in Book 7 and the main things he settled on when it comes down to his characterization. He has a couple realizations:

“Jamil was doing all that stuff for me not because we were friends, but because I am his master and he’s my servant.” -> This realization isn’t Kalim finally understanding that they have a master-servant relationship to begin with. Remember, his dream didn’t change that fact about Kalim and Jamil - only that despite their master-servant relationship, Jamil would still be able to talk to Kalim about his “real thoughts and feelings”, and Jamil would be happy because of it. But things aren’t as simple as that. The realization here is that all of the extra stuff Jamil was doing wasn’t because they were friends and just didn’t want Kalim to reciprocate and do those things for him in return just because he’s a good guy. (Kalim’s idea of friendship is doing things for each other, explained in Kalim’s school uniform personal story.) He did all of that and didn’t want Kalim to reciprocate and do those things for him in return because Jamil is his servant and, whether or not some things were logically a part of Jamil’s job or not (like the listening to Kalim thing, but Jamil also uses the “it’s my job” when he doesn’t listen to Kalim, like in Jamil’s school unidorm personal story to reject the idea fo going to the cafeteria; or in book 4 when Kalim tells Jamil that he doesn’t need to serve ice cream by himself and Kalim can help) (Leona also talks about Jamil making self-pitying excuses like this, as well as Jamil in book 7 getting tired of it himself), that’s what was perceived by Jamil (initially).

“That isn’t the real Jamil…!” / “The way you are now isn’t really what you want…!” / “The real Jamil would never want this!” -> The first is in reaction to dream!Jamil, which is pretty self-explanatory. The second is in reaction to the Jamil in Jamil’s dream; saying that this isn’t the “best you” that Jamil himself imagined or wanted. The third is in reaction to Jamil dropping further into the darkness after Kalim tries to wake him up, only to see him reenact a Book 4 where everyone is hypnotized and Jamil is the dorm leader; specifically, in reaction to Jamil now underestimating and insulting the other dorm leaders, planning to take over the school, and planning to kick the dorm leaders out. Before you say “oh, Kalim just thinks Jamil is a good person still!” no he does not, and fights with Jamil over this. He’s talking about how, if Jamil just goes on to do the same thing with the others as he did with Kalim - manipulate the dorm leaders from the shadows, from an unsuspecting position that’s less than theirs, then Jamil will never get to show his abilities fairly and on the same playing field as others. He’ll be subjecting himself to the same thing he subjected himself to with Kalim when he purposefully received less marks than him. Kalim didn’t give this much of a care when Jamil and Kalim’s positions were swapped in Jamil’s dream, even with whatever happened to Kalim’s family. It’s when Jamil denies himself of the freedom to be himself and resorts to using dirty tricks that Kalim is like “why are you so stupid, this is the opposite of what you want!” His words, not mine (at least, with calling Jamil stupid). That’s why he also says “you’ll never get what you want this way!” if Jamil keeps on doing plans that require him to be put as less capable than the dorm leaders or require him to hypnotize the dorm leader to overuse him to be unsuspecting. This is also why the first memory to resurface after Kalim says this is Jamil saying “I won’t take orders from anyone anymore!”, implying that Jamil won’t put himself in a position where he has to accept orders from anyone like he did in Book 4.

About the “real Jamil” thing, I genuinely think that Kalim’s development aligns with the Genie. The Genie gets upset with Aladdin for not being real with him, and almost gets upset at Aladdin for not being real with Jasmine, but the Genie chose not to say anything. Kalim knows that Jamil is a liar, but when it causes Jamil to lose out on his wishes or not get what he actually wants, Kalim gets upset with him. Kalim being betrayed by Jamil is a “Sultan betrayed by Jafar” thing, but it’s also a “Genie betrayed by Aladdin” thing when Aladdin breaks his promise with the Genie to free him (like Jamil broke his promise with Kalim). Kalim is the Sultan to Jamil’s Jafar in his story, but Jamil is the Aladdin to Kalim’s Genie in his story, which is why the climax of Kalim’s development has him throwing parades for Jamil without struggle in Jamil’s birthday story.

Also, I love Book 7’s implication that Kalim knows Jamil well enough to know that he’ll be able to wake Jamil up from a dream by talking about their memories together based on Kalim’s perspective of them (“we both ran out to the camel bazaar together and got coconut juice!”), knowing Jamil will naturally respond with something that asserts his perspective (“is that what happened?! you ran off and i chased after you!”). Like… Kalim was so calm seeing Jamil just vehemently deny it and he didn’t try to change his perspective, it was kind of funny. Idia even says something along the lines of “Jamil’s irresistible straight-man spirit is being stimulated…!”, being the straight-man to Kalim’s “whimsy”. Kalim understands now that Jamil didn’t do all of those things because he was a good person, it was because of his job, but he purposely says things that suggest the former perspective so Jamil can debate them. Kalim saying “best friend” in quotation marks also suggests this… It’s so good…

I’d also love to take a few key things from Kalim’s perspective in his fight with Jamil before I go on to explain the rest of this:

Kalim mocks Jamil for calling him oblivious and tells him something along the lines of “Shouldn’t you know the most that I’m ‘bad at reading the room’ or ‘bad at inferring things’?!”

After, Jamil tells Kalim “don’t just shift to a defiant attitude!” when Kalim starts saying that, to which Kalim responds with “You said it! I don’t like your two-faced attitude either!” This is along the lines of what Jamil realizes later about Kalim (that he seems like he’s polite and submissive, but in reality he’s not, when he rejects the fake Kalim. this is also as seen when Kalim goes in to hug Jamil, but Jamil knows its intent is just Kalim tackling him; and Kalim himself says that he wished Jamil got more hurt in their fight as evidence for this…)

Kalim childishly goes from calling Jamil a sarcastic bastard to telling Jamil that “I can’t understand you!” whenever Jamil calls Kalim an idiot, which is actually hilarious to me

Oh yeah, Kalim knows what sarcasm is, and actually doesn’t like it

Now that we’ve broken down specific points and scenes from Book 7 Chapter 9, let’s go into some of Kalim’s “oblivious” scenes and what he was probably thinking. Remember: in book 5, it’s revealed that what Kalim actually expresses when it comes to his thoughts vs what he actually thinks might not line up properly because he’s still learning how to best communicate his thoughts. So there can be some leeway with the things Kalim says vs what he could possibly be thinking, as long as you assume some form of logic that doesn’t just boil down to “misunderstanding over nothing”. We have wiggle room in interpretation, but again, this isn’t the only way to interpret Kalim’s character - just a way that makes sense according to what’s been revealed in Book 7.

I’ll be using this analysis here as a base for the overall analysis; the part that talks about Kalim’s weaknesses that he starts off with in general. Lots of people have also mentioned that he’s good at knowing whether something is wrong or not (Silver’s dorm uniform personal story), but not good at figuring out what exactly it is (when he assumed Silver’s down mood was because he was hungry). But this can be inconsistent, which makes sense, because his logic follows along his own common sense (and when applied correctly, it does actually reflect reality). He learns as time goes on, especially when it comes to Jamil, but the most significant change happens when he is told something directly (Jamil telling Kalim to cancel the party in Kalim’s lab personal story, Floyd telling Kalim to stop letting people bud him in Kalim’s playfulland personal story). I’ll briefly put the analysis here for your viewing pleasure so you don’t have to click the link and then come here to find your spot again:

Kalim is an interesting character. A lot of people expected, and wanted, his development to be related to the immediate freeing of Jamil from his services and fate. As much as this was important to Kalim, a lot of people don’t realize that this didn’t align with his or Jamil’s development. It doesn’t even acknowledge the position Kalim first starts with. Kalim starts from a place where he unknowingly trips up Jamil with things that don’t concern Jamil, but Kalim believes it to be important to him. In Kalim’s lab coat card, he explodes the kitchen by accident, and when Jamil comes to check on Kalim and make sure he is okay, Kalim brushes off Jamil’s concerns of Kalim possibly being killed by his family members and instead says that they should focus on fixing up the kitchen before focusing on Kalim’s homework. So that Jamil could make meals for a party that Kalim planned for - for Jamil to get to meet other people in Jamil’s grade and get along with them. Jamil is obviously upset with this and tells Kalim to cancel the party, which Kalim agrees to, because he doesn’t want to get Jamil angry.

People say Kalim has good intentions but bad decision-making skills, but I honestly thought that Kalim was more than emotionally intelligent to come to the conclusion of a party for Jamil. Part of the problem with Scarabia’s relationship is that they are codependent on each other. Kalim saw this and instinctively went ahead to create opportunities where Jamil can meet other people so he can bond with people other than Kalim. This happens a few times, where Kalim recognizes the problems with their relationship, and tries to go and fix it but because of misunderstandings his execution isn’t successful. In his ceremony robes, he knows Jamil isn’t feeling good about the upcoming year and tells Jamil that he should have been housewarden instead. Jamil denies this, and then tells Kalim if there’s anything wrong with the ceremony robes. Kalim, thinking that what Jamil is actually mad about is the robes and not the housewarden thing that he previously rejected Kalim’s proposal on, goes off to change the style of the robes. Jamil’s school uniform story is literally Kalim badly executing his plan of getting Jamil to stop overworking himself by cooking Kalim’s meals by purposefully chowing down on leftovers for the next day, foiled because he misunderstands the actual food Jamil wants and couldn’t properly bring the food to him. It’s an actual metaphor for the actual problems Kalim has with Jamil - misunderstandings and poor execution. Kalim tells Jamil “Hey, we should go to the cafeteria every day!” Jamil rejects this idea and Kalim is genuinely surprised at this. Kalim doesn’t act on whims just to act on whims, but because he has an idea that his crazy plan might actually help.

It happens again in Book 4, when he recognizes Jamil is concerned about their parents seeing Kalim serve food, but Kalim says that their parents aren’t there, so they shouldn’t be worried. Kalim’s emotional intelligence comes back again in the magic carpet ride, where he says it wouldn’t hurt if Jamil loosened up a little bit - understanding the stress and strife Jamil goes through, and still racking his head on possible reasons as to why. (There’s a reason as to why he doesn’t attribute Jamil’s personality to his and Kalim’s servant and master positions and I’ll explain it later.) Kalim’s been trying from Day 1 to work with Jamil and understand him but because of his poor execution of his plans, he keeps falling short. At the end of the day, Kalim not only has good intentions but thoroughly deduces what the roots of the problem of their relationship was. He’s actually pretty good at this in general, and deduces what Trey projecting onto the relationship between Kalim and his carpet means about Trey’s relationship with Riddle, and encourages Trey to vent to him. But there are moments like with Riddle’s gym story; Kalim not immediately seeing why he can’t just call Riddle horrible at fitness because it means Riddle will retaliate with anger and possibly get his magic shut down for the day, and Jamil covering up to stop the mess before it happens. (I’m going to be very honest though, Kalim will be mean in a reciprocal way for the sake of reciprocity if someone is mean to him. But it’ll be very subtle that it can easily be explained with obliviousness - Riddle first saying “Write your time down if you’re going to forget it next time”, and after Jamil tells Riddle thanks for babysitting Kalim, Riddle saying “You’re welcome, you deserve a break sometimes” when Kalim was literally right there… that was Kalim’s invitation to serve the shade right back 😂 Like… it’s his immediate response to Riddle saying that. He does this with Leona in New Years as well, when Leona says “unlike other people (Kalim), I actually have things to do with my time”, to which Kalim responds with “You should join in next time too!” implying that he knows Leona doesn’t actually have other things to do but sleep, and also acknowledging the shade on himself, which is kind of hilarious to me. And he doesn’t even do it on purpose - he’s not an evil mastermind, this is him giving back the attitude others give him because reciprocity is a part of his idea of friendship.) Or moments like in the Scarabia dorm uniform cards, where Kalim ends up making more work for Jamil even when they split their duties because Kalim did his parts sloppily or without care. That is an actual flaw of Kalim but it’s not obliviousness to a situation, it’s his carefree attitude that's the issue.

That reciprocity is actually part of the reason why Kalim didn’t catch what was going on with Jamil. We see in Kalim’s personal story that his fate of getting poisoned is the fate of the eldest son of the Asim family, and this was an idea told to Kalim by both his dad and Jamil. We see Jamil in Alab Nariya tell Kalim to go do his job instead of helping guide the guests, his friends, around. Kalim assumed this division of duties and roles was just how things are supposed to be, and that these are just aspects of themselves that they need to deal with. That Kalim needs to deal with even if he wants to do something else. What he didn’t realize was that Jamil was doing everything beyond his duty, not because it was him trying to be friends with Kalim and that Kalim should reciprocate to be friends with Jamil back, but because “beyond his duty” was actually a perceived part of his duty. No matter what solutions Kalim offers to Jamil, to Jamil it will always be within the context of “Jamil agrees to these solutions because Kalim is the master and Jamil is the servant or disagreed to these solutions because Kalim is the master and Jamil is the servant”, not because it’s actually something Jamil wants.

FYI, this is also why at the end, Jamil says he wants to get to choose whether he is the master or the servant. And this development is so important. He rejects the fake Kalim, all of Jamil’s hopes and distorted images of a fake Kalim, in the same manner that he rejected the real Kalim in Book 4. (And this is positioned as being Jamil’s equivalent to Vil killing everyone in his dream. Vil’s personality was not beautiful, and Jamil was not being mindful initially, but there are steps he’s taking to assert his perspective here.) He knows Kalim now and what he’ll do for Jamil. He knows Kalim will respond to his desires. But Jamil will decide if he wants to torture Kalim by asserting the role of a servant (nothing you do will matter because I’m stuck here and I know how badly being useless pisses you off), or if he wants to torture Kalim by asserting the role of a master (I will dictate how the pace of our conversations will go, I will tell you what I want, and I know you will do it for me). Kalim getting upset with Jamil in general over his attitude - finally realizing the core of what Jamil really wants - is why Jamil is so happy with this development even though he says in Book 4 “you never change” to Kalim with a relieved look on his face. Kalim is finally getting it and understanding it. Jamil was scared of what straying from the status quo meant for him, and is now starting to get comfortable with the paths they both chose.

After Book 7 and seeing people like Vil call Kalim a little scary for his traits, seeing Kalim blow up with Jamil the way he did, and seeing Kalim after that tell Jamil that’s he’s a little pissed Jamil didn’t get more hurt really makes you go back and look at the context of scenes in a different light. Everything led to this direction of character development. Kalim getting frustrated over the main vocals in Book 5… Jamil insinuating Vil’s overblot was Kalim’s fault and Kalim nearly screaming in frustration over it (he lets out a little squeal instead)… Kalim getting mad at Jade insinuating that the others might already be dead… Kalim hug-tackling Jamil out of relief but also at tiny frustrations because he was so worried, and Jamil in their dreams later on recognizing that Kalim doesn’t just hug but hug-tackles and Jamil not wanting to get tackled… This happens in events too. Kalim hugs Fellow after everything is said and done but also slaps him on the back more than a few times.

There are so many layers to him. Eventually, Kalim learnt to develop his very minuscule mean streak into actual retaliation out of rage. A part of why Book 4 worked so well is because their relationship is so interesting. Jamil and Kalim are both interesting. Azul even says that the only person Kalim cares enough about to even promise something like keeping a dangerous unique magic a secret is Jamil. Which gets you wondering how people actually perceive how Kalim interacts with other people in the cast, because he could easily have cared about anyone else in the same way. Jamil is the exception and it’s emphasized over and over again - he is the one person Kalim will not be mean to (used to), Kalim genuinely wants to help him especially because Jamil helps him (still does! back to Kalim’s nature of reciprocity, based on his interpretation of how friendships work), and he is the one person Kalim trusts. The only person. Measured now, like a lot of other developments with Kalim related to things he used to not be able to do (tie his headband, organize a parade by himself) but now can (Cloudcalling voice lines, Jamil’s comfy birthday story), but the idea is still there. Which was always to get to truly understand the real Jamil and fulfill his real desires!

Now that we understand where Kalim starts with and where he ends off, as well as the development he went through all these books and events, what does this mean for his character? Does he end off wanting to help or wanting to assert his perspective? He found a way to align both of these with his development. He still wants to help Jamil; but now, he’ll say what he actually thinks and take a proactive stance in making sure Jamil doesn’t “shoot himself in the foot” over his self-pitying and counterintuitive attitude that restricts himself. He’s found a way to incorporate both his natural disposition that wants to help others and his acknowledgement of his own negative feelings. It’s really beautiful, and I can only wish the best for him and Jamil from here on out. I wish this was a feeling shared by the rest of the fandom, but sometimes, you can’t help stupidity… oh whoops I didn’t say that! You didn’t hear that! Hahaha…

Such a long time in the fandom and so many things answered! But so many other things left unanswered… I can’t wait to see where they go next 🙌

[vividachromatic]

Meant To Stay The Worst

Pt. 1

Alastor x Reader

(friendship, slowbuild romance)

Pt. 2 ->

Note: This is gonna be a series. Reader and Alastor will be friends and fall in love and marry and meet each other again in hell and rule there as overlords...

Sounds nice and simple. And although all that is true, there will be a lot of emotional drama still. First, because of Alastor's trust issues, but also because they don't have a 'lovey-dovey' nice relationship. There will be fluff, and they'll love each other, yes. But the concept of their relationship is basically supporting each other in making each other worse. Like, they're in hell for a reason and want to stay there... They do morally corrupt things and even when they don't agree with each other they support each other.

I don't think this is dark enough to be considered a dark fic at all, it's more canon typically dark. But just to say this isn't meant to portray a healthy relationship or morals.

Warnings: Fem!Reader, use of Y/N (kill me for it) , Alastor AND reader are on the ace spectrum but don't know , alcohol use, idk tell me if there's smth else

---

There was cake and tea, lovely flowers and lovely dresses. If you'd have been alone this may have been relaxing. But every time you tried to let your mind drift off to something nice - like a scenario of a book you read, the obnoxious voice of your cousin snapped you back to reality.

"Then he told me our offspring would be genetically superior!" She giggled.

"How romantic." You sighed in boredom and tried focusing on something else. Being forced to drink tea with your lovely cousin who tormented you ever since childhood, just so she could please her own sadistic desires was something you had to do as a representing lady of your house.

God being a woman in the 1930s was exhausting.

Your cousin Maria rolled her eyes at you. "Does it make you happy to be so negative all the time? You know you're gonna die alone if you don't fix this attitude of yours, right? You act like you're better than me, but at least men like me." She gave you a smug grin.

"Yeah, congratulations. I'm actually not really interested in the constant humiliation of being treated like a lesser human being, nor the year-long physical abuse I'd have to endure until I'd finally finish slowly poisoning my husband's tea."

Maria narrowed her eyes at your audacity to speak your opinion. Then she cleared her throat and smirked at you again - this was the look she always had as a child when she was about to torture you. "Speaking of which... I actually have someone you may be interested in meeting this time."

You just stared at her blankly without a response. You were forced to go on dates with different men all the time.

You were 21 and still not married, which was just a scandal for your family. But, you always managed to successfully scare these men away on your dates. Because you're a woman, your opinion of whether or not they'd be a good spouse obviously didn't matter, so you had to think of creative ways to make them not want to choose you.

After noticing your lack of response to her statement, Maria simply continued, "See there is this radio broadcast I've been listening to and this broadcaster... he just had such a hot voice! And he talked about some stuff... I don't know what, I didn't really listen, but he seemed proper, so I asked my dad to use his power to arrange a date for me! But, when I researched him further... I think he's a little poor actually, he wore this fake brand... also he doesn't really look like how I expected him to look, so... since you're all for this equality stuff I thought it'd be perfect. My dad is mad at me since he already paid for the date, so you're perfect!" She finished, giving you a fake smile.

"Hmm... this actually sounds like your problem, not mine." You gave her a fake smile back.

The girl just gave you an angry look and finished drinking her tea in silence.

Oh, you were so sure she was going to try to find a way to punish you for this.

And right you were. Your dad informed you the same day that you were going to go on that date. And you should definitely look out to not fuck this one up again.

Your father even acted like he cared about you for a second, explaining how this is what you must do in this world. Even if it's not perfect. You just went to your room in silence, trying not to cry in front of him.

This world was cruel. Your brother followed society's expectations and was fine. Your cousin followed society's expectations and was fine. You didn't and were unhappy. So was this truly the answer?

The next day you made yourself ready - skipping breakfast.

You'd just scare off this man like the others. Maybe you'd have to marry someone mediocre one day. Or maybe you were gonna run away someday. You weren't sure yet.

Arriving at the restaurant you recognized the cheesy interior suiting the style of your cousin and her father immediately.

The polite waiter recognized your face and showed you your table.

This supposed date of yours already sat there. When he saw you walking towards him, he immediately stood up and politely extended his hand to you. You took it and he planted a short kiss on your knuckles. The waiter handed you the menus and excused himself.

The man had a polite and big smile on his face and pulled your seat back, waiting for you to sit down until he sat down himself giving you a small bow. "My name is Alastor! It's a pleasure to be meeting you my dear, quite a pleasure."

He was definitely polite. But you did see what your cousin meant by saying he was probably not from a rich family. His moves seemed too much like he memorized them from a book only a short while ago, and not from real experience. His clothes seemed expensive for someone from a lower class but not higher. He also looked more dark-skinned than people in your family would probably find great.

"My name is Y/N. It's a pleasure to be meeting you, too." You tried giving him an honest smile back. He was probably gonna turn out to be an asshole, too, like all the guys, but for now, he hasn't done anything wrong.

The two of you exchanged light small talk before ordering your meals. You were surprised to see him ordering a heavy meal with a lot of meat and strongly seasoned. You of course didn't care what he was gonna eat and ordered your favorite meal, too, whatever his opinion may be, but you were used to everyone ordering the same boring and light stuff to seem healthy and well-mannered.

The conversation seemed superficial and boring but not too bad. He had at least not shown any extremely radical opinions or behavior yet.

His smile remained on his face throughout the whole conversation and after a while, he cleared his throat and explained kindly to you: "Look, you seem like a really beautiful and lovely woman, any man would be lucky to have you. This is why I have to be honest with you and tell you: I'm actually not interested in any romantic relationship or anything similar. But I am flattered by the letter you sent me and I do enjoy your company..." his smile didn't falter as he tried to politely let you down. It did though, when he saw your unusual reaction to his rejection.

Your always neutral-looking face until now, was slowly forming a smile and your eyes lit up. You were offended he actually thought your cousin's (probably vile) letter was written by you, but all in all you were glad, because this man didn't actually expect to sleep with you or even continue meeting.

You let out a relieved laugh. After seeing his confused face you quickly apologized, "I'm sorry, I just- my father forces me to go on these dates when I'm not actually looking for a relationship. I was already prepared to try to make up some story to scare you off, too, like I always do. But it seems like I may actually be able to enjoy a dinner for once without pretensions or expectations."

Though scaring men away can be entertaining in itself, too.

Your truly relieved smile, while picking up your food made Alastor smile again, too.

"Well if that's the case, I am happy we're on the same page, then. Though I am surprised about this... letter of yours then." He smiled gently, though his eyebrows scrunched a little in irritation when he said the word letter.

You then explained the existence of your cousin with a roll of your eyes and an embarrassed smile.

From that point on your conversation was much lighter and actually enjoyable. You both shared your annoyance at everyone's expectation to have to marry to have a life worth living. You then shared your struggle specifically as a woman. Marrying a man basically meant selling yourself to another man after you belonged to your father. It's like being an object.

Surprisingly, he actually agreed and talked about feminism and how much he appreciated women, especially his mother who solely cared for him since he was little.

He then explained how he definitely didn't want to meet the person who wrote that letter and expected an awful evening, but his mother encouraged him to at least try to meet a girl for once. This then ended in you talking shit about your cousin and him laughing about it.

It's the first time you talked to someone who actually shared your opinion. Of course, you knew those people existed, there was a wave of feminist women nowadays, calling themselves 'flappers' and even some men supported it. But you were never able to meet any of them, the only people you met were the same old, sheltered relatives of yours or their acquaintances.

You did have a thirst for knowledge though, which was the reason you knew about all of this in the first place, even when you were supposed to only associate yourself with a certain circle of people.

But you loved to read books you weren't supposed to and you loved to express yourself through art, when you weren't supposed to.

You tried learning basic self-defense too, but it wasn't easy through words alone and nobody wanted to teach you, because it was 'unlady-like'.

Alastor listened to you talking with a smile and nodded. He then explained how he hung around Jazz bars pretty often and got to know many beautiful feminist women there. You listened attentively. You heard about these places and wanted to go there for some time... Alastor noticed your interest and invited you to show you around one of these bars sometime.

You agreed with a genuine happy smile. This meeting was so unexpectedly nice. And you probably even made an actual friend for once.

"I do have to ask... you said you scare men away usually?" He asked and you nodded with a grin.

"So, how do you do that exactly?" He asked with a smirk while eating his steak.

"I usually just pretend to be a witch, a cannibal or a serial killer. Always works." You shrugged. Convincing men of these things over one date was actually easier than you'd think. And it did make sure they would never want to contact you again.

"Oh? But you're not, right?" He asked, his smile not wavering.

"Hmmm..." You obviously assumed his question to be a joke or rhetorical and answered, "No, I'm sadly not that interesting." You grinned and he gave you a weird grin back.

After the date, he walked you back to your house like a proper gentleman and kissed the back of your hand again when saying goodbye. He was a proper gentleman, not condescending or expectant of anything. This was definitely nice.

When you arrived back home you seemed surprisingly happier than your father or your brother expected you to be. They asked you how it went and you just said it went well and returned to your room.

...

One week later you met Alastor again in front of a local Jazz Bar. He politely offered to intertwine his arm with yours before entering the place.

Inside you were immediately greeted with...

"Alastor!!!" A small blonde girl hugged him with huge enthusiasm. He awkwardly patted her back.

"Aww!! Who is this sweet doll you brought with you?" The girl grinned at you.

"This is Y/N. A new friend of mine." Alastor introduced you to the short, chubby girl. You gave her a shy wave with your hand.

She immediately took your hand and dragged you into the club. "Well, Alastor's friends are my friends! You're pretty! Can you do the Charleston?" You blinked at her in confusion, looking around you, trying to find Alastor. You weren't used to people touching you or dragging you around this much... was this gonna go bad?

"Mimzy! How about you leave this lovely, little fellow to me, hm? She's still quite new to the scene." Alastor grinned at the girl and took your hand to guide you to him again. You sighed in relief. This girl seemed nice, but you didn't know her.

"Hmmm..." The girl glanced between you and Alastor with a thoughtful expression. "Alright! Does the new girl at least want some alc?" She grinned.

You politely told her the drink you wanted and Alastor just said 'the usual' with a dismissive wave of his hand and a smile. Mimzy nodded and left the two of you.

Alastor now led you to a private boot. You felt awkward. You were usually not too shy, but this situation was so unfamiliar.

"Hey..." You felt a hand on top of yours. "Relax." Alastor smiled at you. You nodded with a sigh.

Later Mimzy came back with a glass of your drink and a bottle of whiskey for her and Alastor. They ended up sharing the bottle with you after.

Mimzy smoked a cigar and encouraged you to try it, too - you did and though it was nice, you had to cough a lot.

Mimzy just giggled, calling you cute. Later she and Alastor showed you how to dance the Charleston. At first, you were embarrassed to try it, but after a couple of drinks, you were convinced.

After dancing for a while you sat back in the corner of the booth, Alastor smiling at you and pouring you another drink. "I'm grateful, but I think this is gonna be the last one." You tried not to slur your words too much and smiled at him, still out of breath and blushing from the dancing and the alcohol.

He nodded. "I'll walk you back home, of course." You smiled at him in gratitude.

This was probably one of the most enjoyable night you've had in a while. Though it probably was just a regular one for Alastor and his friend. You wondered if she was his girlfriend, she was pretty and he said he wasn't interested in romancing you.

Later when Alastor walked you home he gave you a small kiss on the cheek, despite this not being labeled as an actual date.

Alastor grinned at your face flushing in embarrassment and he asked you if you'd want to repeat the night. You enthusiastically agreed.

--------------------

This fic is my offering to the Helluva/Hazbin God to finally grace us with Helluva Boss s2 ep8 🙏🙏🙏 (I know I'm pushing my luck here, but also please let Blitzo and Stolas fix their relationship- okay now I'm getting delusional)

If you want to know how girlie scared off men, I just had 'Red Flags' by Tom Cardy in mind lmao.

Anyway, I've planned way more parts for this one, including when they are both married and in hell, so stay tuned!

[shizunitis]

Luo Binghe & Tianlang-Jun: Origins. And a Bit of Projection.

Disclaimer: This is basically just a collection of quotes from The Scum Villain's Self-Saving System, Volume 3, accompanied by (adjective) thoughts, and then even more relevant quotes listed at the end. If I could, I’d paste the entirety of Chapter 18.

“As expected, I can’t bring myself to hate humans.” — Vol. 3, Chapter 21: Always Together

I will always be conflicted on the topic of Tianlang-jun, and it annoys me. There is so much I could say about him, and so little I can successfully articulate. He is, to me, more confounding, complex and tragic than Shen Jiu.

He’s pitiful and awe-inspiring, wicked and affable, cunning and wide-eyed in his curiousity. He is a compelling, heartbreaking character. He alternates between emotionless wisdom and mournful apathy. I admire how his knees don’t buckle under the weight of his grief, but how he crumbles at the barest hint of hope. How rage claws at him and, still, he can’t figure out how to make it stick.

I empathise with him. I understand him.

But then, in the distance, Luo Binghe's indifferent voice disturbs the silence, causing me to drop my drink onto the floor and this post onto your screen:

“He’s not my father.”

It’s an interesting exercise, exploring their relationship in reconciliation fics. To see them interact (semi-)honestly, watch them take turns filling up the chasm between them. It’s wonderful. Every fic I’ve read centred around them was a delightful read that I still think about.

However. I cannot see Tianlang-Jun, as I understand him, as Luo Binghe’s father. And not just because of the 3rd Novel’s events.

But because Binghe had hoped for something; he did have that wide-eyed wonder. He did hold one last window open, for the sake of an improbability he couldn’t quite, just yet, dismiss.

It’s what (most) orphaned and/or adopted childred do.

Though Luo Binghe had never said a word about it before, Shen Qingqiu knew that he harbored some fantasies about his birth parents. […] In fact, he’d always secretly fantasized about whether his parents might still be alive, and how well they’d treat him, and how they’d never let him suffer the mildest slight. — Vol. 3, Chapter 17: Tianlang

It is the most human thing; to want to be helped, accepted, invited by those given to you. A family is given to you. Whether you believe it an act of the divine, of nature, of coincidence, it isn’t something you fight for. It’s the first and, arguably, only thing you don’t have to fight for in life.

Depending on a multitude of factors, that can be a blessing or a curse; but where there is room for interpretation, questions left unanswered, most childred—Binghe included—will turn to their imagination, and try to make sense of it. Usually, to comfort themselves, to reassure themselves that surely, if their family could, they would have.

And, yeah. Most likely, if the Palace Master had gotten punted into the Sun like he fucking deserved, they would have. But does it matter?

In the face of a bleak reality, what comfort is a could-have-been?

He liked to call Luo Binghe “that son of mine,” but he didn’t seem to possess any concept of fatherly affection. […] Luo Binghe was in fact…someone who was unloved by even his own parents. — Vol. 3, Chapter 15: Holy Mausoleum

What use are good intentions to an abandoned child? What consolation is it, to say, They gave birth to you, when that child has seen no evidence of their care? Does it dry their tears, that their mother can’t be here, but she surely would have wished to be? That their father would protect them, if only he knew of them?

(And don’t make me tell you about the visceral horror I felt reading the Origins chapter. I’ve yet to make my peace with it. MXTX, Airplane, whoever: you’ve ruined me.)

The washerwoman was and continues to be, to Binghe, his only mother. And I would argue, that’s healthy. Even independent of his other traumas (Abyss, Shizun’s betrayal, Xin Mo’s influence, living on the streets, etc, holy shit Binghe) Luo Binghe will not accept anyone else as his mother.

“Who is this Su Xiyan?” Luo Binghe asked coldly. “My mother was a mere washerwoman.” — Vol. 3, Chapter 18: Origins.

It may seem callous. It probably even is! But it is a healthy line he’d drawn by his own initiative. It’s what helps him, what he feels he needs to do in order to do right by his mother, and his own heart.

And! Tianlang-Jun doesn’t seem to give much of a shit, either!

Won’t, probably, even in the future, once the dust will have settled. He is exhausted, weary with carrying the corpse of his love, the loss of his nephew. Whatever goodwill he shows, it’s a perfunctory sort, because he can’t afford more.

So. Uhh.

Tianlang-Jun is not a character I can love, nor one I can hate. Usually, I can’t help but be inclined to love complex characters. Like them, too—though that’s more of an action-based thing rather than just said character’s personality.

But with Tianlang-Jun, I’m stuck whichever way I turn. If I want to love/like him, I’m drawn back by Binghe’s pain and disappointment. If I try to hate/dislike him, I’m drawn back by his own history and grief.

In conclusion:

I don't know! I'm not really trying to, like, prove anything. I still love the aforementioned TLJ & LBH fics, I still love their dynamic. I started walking and ended up exactly in the same space. This, perhaps, could be considered a Heavenly Demon Family Mobius Strip!

I'm not really trying to say anything. It just… makes me feel conflicted, and angry, and whenever I allow myself to think about it a bit more, sad.

But.

However!

Alas.

Nonetheless, even.

As a reader and—on my better days—a writer, all I can say is:

As promised/threatened: some selected passages, for your reading pleasure:

So, it looked like neither the father nor the cousin had any intention of acknowledging Luo Binghe. — Chapter 15: Holy Mausoleum

He liked to call Luo Binghe “that son of mine,” but he didn’t seem to possess any concept of fatherly affection. — Chapter 15: Holy Mausoleum

Tianlang-Jun lifted his hand, took a look at Luo Binghe’s snow-pale face, and commented indifferently, “He looks like his mother.” “His eyes look like yours,” came a chill voice from the side. — Chapter 15: Holy Mausoleum

The faint hopes and dreams Luo Binghe had held in his heart for many years had been mercilessly pulverized into so much dust. […] [Tianlang-Jun] refused to speak a single word of their relationship and had been utterly ruthless back in the Holy Mausoleum. […] To his parents, Luo Binghe was an unwanted child. — Chapter 18: Origins

“If he was my father, why didn’t he bring it up earlier? Why not tell me?” The most Tianlang-Jun had said was that single line he offered while beating up Luo Binghe, devoid of either praise or criticism: “He looks like his mother.” He looks like his mother. What of it? But that was all. There was nothing more. — Chapter 18: Origins

Luo Binghe was indifferent. “He’s not my father.” […] Luo Binghe shook his head. It was unclear what he was stubbornly clinging to, but he repeated, “He’s not my father.” — Chapter 18: Origins

Luo Binghe raised his smiling face, his eyes shining brightly. “Mother was the kindest person in all the world to me.” — Chapter 19: Shen Jiu

[exaflux]

How good is BTAA Scarecrow at therapy really? (An analysis) (Part 1)

So I naively thought that this'd be a laugh. Take the unethical psychiatrist, analyse his techniques, highlight what he's doing in real world contexts and give him a rating. After hours of working on this though I unintentionally managed to construct a theory on how BTAA Jon might approach therapy. Oop.

This part contains- a breakdown of some psychological approaches in therapy settings, character analysis/theory of Jon (in the conclusion), Jon being awful

Disclaimer- I am not a trained psychologist or therapist or anything of the like. I did study the topic under a teacher who was a trained psychologist though, and I still very much like psychology, so that basically makes me an expert in this field. This is a joke. Do not take my word as gospel. This post was written for fun and will probably have a mistake somewhere.

Harvey and Two-face will be referred to seperately in this analysis, but if referring to both Harvey will be used as default. Jonathan is Jonathan.

A-Level psychology don't fail me now 🙏

Session one/"two"-

The following all takes place in S2, Episode 5

The first section of our analysis takes place on March 4th and the time is 2:02pm, surprising no one as Two-Face is present. Jonathan begins the session by setting up a recording and going through standard legal procedure, following the “Code of Medical Ethics” (0:15) of Gotham. He also makes note that the first tape was destroyed, again probably for legal reasons. Good start.

Being that it was Harvey that destroyed the last tape machine due to a mishap of it not being the first session and Harvey refusing to perceive the number one, Jon asks him to elaborate- “tell me more about that” (0:56). Asking for more info on something a client has said often shows interest, which helps with relationship building, and on the mental health professional’s end would help build an understanding of the client. It has been established at this point that the session is for “introductory psychoanalytic examinations” (0:24), so that latter point is especially important. Killing two birds with one stone, very efficient. Whether Jon actually shows interest towards Harvey’s fascination for the number two though is a completely different matter. 

In addition, throughout all this Jon also gives terse responses, “I see.” (00:49) (1:11), to Harvey’s statements to indicate he’s listening and doesn’t try to weigh in. One-sided conversation such as these allow the client to speak as much as they need to, the sessions are for them after all.  

So overall, Jonathan is being very professional so far. 

At 1:21 of the episode is when Jon finally decides to give his thoughts (after Harvey has finished talking) stating that "The best way for [him] to help [Harvey] is to establish a bond of trust between [them]” (1:26), something that Harvey agrees to. Truthfully, another thing that is important between client and mental health professional, so his approach isn’t wrong.

Upon Harvey agreeing to this, Jon promptly demands that he be given the coin, something Harvey doesn't want to do. At being told that he isn’t comfortable with that, Jon points out that "it's not up to [Harvey]" (1:46) and takes the coin anyway through it's infallible decision-making prowess and the full knowledge that Harvey relies on the coin for all his decision making. He successfully gets the coin, Harvey is unhappy, and trust is established. But not really because Jonathan didn’t respect Harvey’s personal feelings nor wishes. Which is a breach of ethics. Horrible decision really. Jon places the coin on the table, presumably in a place where both he and Harvey can see it, and he declares aloud that it's on the table. In any other context this might have actually been a good way to maintain trust while seperating an item of emotional importance from a client, but such actions should only be taken with the consent of said client. 🚨 JONATHAN IS BEING UNETHICAL HERE. 🚨

Afterwards Jonathan reopens the session, “We meet again for the very first time” (2:06) as though everything said and done previously never happened. He goes on to ask the pair to reintroduce themselves. He notably sounds more casual here and upon hearing that Two-Face is older asks “Harvey was here first, wasn’t he?” (2:21) in a tone that doesn’t sound genuinely surprised. The question was most likely asked as a method to fish for confirmation or another elaboration.  

He then moves on after Two-Face is done speaking, very obviously not caring about the reasoning given for Two-Face's origins, to say that he heard “a horror story” (2:58) referring to the courtroom incident. Despite Two-Face's response being a positive one, claiming “That day set me free, like it was in the beginning” (3:11), Jon instead believes that the incident “found [Two-Face] in [his] hiding place” (3:17) and that he was hiding because he was, and still is, “afraid of what [he] would do without Harvey” (3:27). Jon weighing in should have ideally been avoided here. Therapy is normally approached with a mentality akin to teaching a man to fish, where the point is to teach a client how to identify and analyse their own feelings.

Instead of stating why a client thinks/feels as they do, a mental health professional will tactically ask questions in an effort to get a client to reflect. Jon asks some of these questions- “Do you ever wonder what if that acid had taken more than half of your face that terrible day? [...] What if when the acid had done its business, there wasn’t enough of Harvey left to do the serious work?” (3:30) which, in a way, counts. There is still criticism to be had here though as wording can passively influence how a client thinks. Describing the day that Harvey went through his incident as being “terrible”? Probably made Harvey view a day considers favourably as something more negative. Likewise, stating that Harvey could have somehow been lost that day from the acid in all certainty no doubt might have instilled some sense of unease in Two-Face. You should avoid making clients uncomfortable. Bad therapy moment.❌And then Jon follows these questions to Harvey up with another explanation, "You won't let it [cross your mind] because it frightens you [...] the thought of being alone." (3:50).❌❌

“Let’s try something. Bear with me” (3:58) Jon says next, reaching for the acid he inexplicably keeps in his draw. Upon being asked what he’s going to be doing with it by one (two?) Two-Face, Jon retorts with his own question, “What are you afraid I’m going to do with it, hmm?” (4:18) before pissing around with the acid and wanting Harvey to “Tell [him] about the fear” (4:29). This is an example of Jonathan being unethical again. Remember gaining the consent of clients of a therapeutic activity you want to do together is of utmost importance. Likewise, then Jon clarifies that he thinks that Harvey is scared of the “other” (5:05) attribute he acquired that day that wasn’t just the acid damage. Believing that tapping into this fear would cause emotional distress, he proceeds to dunk Harvey’s coin into the acid, destroying it. 🚨JONATHAN IS BEING UNETHICAL AGAIN, DO NOT DELIBERATELY CAUSE MENTAL DISTRESS TO CLIENTS OR DESTROY THEIR PROPERTY. 🚨 According to Jonathan himself he considers his actions “aggressive intervention” (5:30), but Jonathan’s judgement for considering this necessary can be called into question. 

Finally, after everything is said and done and Harvey has in fact been reduced to “a puddle of quivering terror” (5:10) like Jon predicted, Jon is again back to asking Harvey questions about his feelings and acting like a good mental health professional. He even reassures Harvey that he understands! Creating an environment of understanding and lack of judgement is important in any therapy setting. And, further playing his role as a psychiatrist, Jonathan in all his understanding of Harvey’s inability to make decisions anymore prescribes him with meds of his own creation. He explains what the medication does positively, in fluffy terms rather than anything technical, and gets Harvey to take it. While Jonathan is allowed to prescribe medication like this being a psychiatrist rather than just a psychologist, the fact that he starts tooting his own horn about how good the meds are, neglecting to talk about the potential side effects, and then makes Harvey take them anyway is, again, unethical. Informed consent should always be taken from clients before prescribing and a therapy session is an inappropriate setting to advertise your products.

In conclusion:

Jonathan takes more Ls in this session of therapy than he has moments doing his job in the proper way, and his approaches to psychological methods indicate that he takes those Ls not from any amount of ignorance on his part but from a blatant disregard for the well-being of his clients. He plays nice and uses correct therapy techniques consistently only up until he establishes a "bond of trust" by removing Harvey's coin, despite Harvey's feelings. After, Jon can be observed descending more and more into ignoring basic therapy practices; providing his own viewpoints on events, outright stating why Harvey feels as he does, refusing to explain what he's planning to do, eventually getting to the point where he's talking more than the clients during the session. All this happens until Jon permanently rids Harvey of the coin for good, leading to an emotional breakdown in the clients and a subsequent administration of drugs.

If I didn't know any better I'd say that during these events, Jonathan goes from setting up the session like any mental health professional would to gradually steering the session into the direction he wants it to go. Even moreso if one regards how he brings up the court room incident of his own volition completely unprompted (2:50) which then leads that into bringing up the topic of fears. Which eventually leads to dropping the coin into acid... Now this idea is insidious enough as it is, right? I'm sure this Dr Jonathan Crane is a well meaning psychiatrist, I mean he's following Gotham's Code of Medical Ethics! So here's also a slightly different perspective to all this:

Jon is speedrunning therapy.

I mean think about it- not even two minutes into the session and Jon basically forces Harvey into "trusting" him. This is only the second time that they've had a session together mind and trust is a thing that often takes months or even years to form between a mental health professional and a client. The chosen method of building trust was to remove a valued item from Harvey and one that he relies on, again something that takes multiple sessions to build up to and- as had been stated- is a valid trust building technique. After taking the coin Jon still leaves it in a place where Harvey knows where it is, just like you'd expect in a therapy setting. Jon even asks the pair to introduce themselves before deliberately steering things into talking about the court room incident which is the nexus point for why Harvey relies on the coin as far as he's concerned. Even him outright telling Two-Face what his fears are could be interpreted as him not wanting to spend months doing the standard therapy approaches that aren't even a guarantee for any progress.

In fact, Jon doesn't even attempt to destroy the coin either until the following happens in order: he tells Two-Face he thinks the court room incident found him and he was hiding out of fear of what he'd do without Harvey, he then asks Two-Face if he's ever thought about what he'd do if Harvey was unable to do much of anything anymore, then outright tells Two-Face he's afraid of being alone before then saying "Let's try something" (3:54) as though he's about to demonstrate his point, forcing Two-Face to acknowledge it.

"I think we had a breakthrough" (5:36) indeed. Breakthroughs are when a client successfully identifies something about themselves, like where a thought or feeling or bad habit stems from. A client having a breakthrough is the point where therapy can progress. And, hey, Harvey probably did make a breakthrough from losing his coin, though it was forced. This breakthrough led to being given a special drug. Which is something to be explored in a later part.

Of course though none of this really matters. Therapy is about treating a person as a person and "teaching a man to fish". Apparently Jonathan doesn't care about fishing.

FINAL SCORE FOR THE SESSION:

🎊 3/10 🎊

Jon is definitely not lacking in skills when it comes to psychology or therapy techniques, in fact he seemed decent enough for the first chunk before the session metaphorically drove off a cliff through his driving- intentionally no less. He simply lacks regard for the feelings of his clients and is a walking ethics breach. Likewise he took deliberate control of the session, and whether the end result was intentional or not this is definitely not something to do in a therapy setting. His approach to "therapy" may lead to breakthroughs, making his clients recognise the things he identifies, but it's not in the true spirit of therapy. It's doubtful that a client under him would ever learn the techniques they need to overcome whatever things they might struggle with.

...And this isn't even getting into how much enjoyment he seems to get from making his clients uncomfortable.

[emchante]

I return with more fluffy divorced dad Daniel 🥰 the man is an obvious sucker for physical touch in terms of love languages. He’ll purr like a cat when you run your hands through his hair but his new favorite thing is receiving beard scratches. Then he’s literally like a cat, sticking his chin forward, presenting that salt and pepper facial hair, eyes closing in bliss as your nails scratch around the rough patches. Do it while he’s laying on your chest and you’ll successfully lure the tired man to sleep. Sometimes when he doesn’t want to ask for the scratches verbally, he’ll take your hand, press a kiss to your palm, put it against his chin and give you puppy dog eyes until you give in and you’ll be rewarded with the most adorable smile when you comply <3

~🫠

NONNIEEE HELLO!! fluffy divorced dad!daniel thoughts.. oh my, oh my, oh myyyy. i LOVE this so much??

rambles below the cut as per!!

daniel’s love language is physical touch, if it wasn’t obvious enough with how touchy he is, atleast he confirmed it last year.

and oh my god, divorced dad!daniel? oh he’s an absolute sucker for it. especially when you keep in mind he’s been out of a relationship for a while. i haven’t established yet whether he has messed around with others or not— but whether he has or not, it’s for fucking and nothing else. he gets pleasure out of it, obviously. but he doesn’t get the affectionate, softer gestures.

so when you come along, and once you’ve both moved further from just sex? oh he’s almost melting when you touch him. you’re the reason he grows out his hair longer, keeps his curls and the grey (me and di established this last night 👀 might need to post a little lore tidbit if anyone is interested), so when he’s grown it out and you run your fingers through it? he’s almost knocked out instantly. bonus points if you do it post-sex and he’s on your chest, that man is literally asleep in under 60 seconds.

but oh, the beard scratches? loves them. adores them, even. feeling your soft fingers run along his newly-grown beard before using your nails to scratch along both his skin and facial hair— absolute heaven. the noises he lets out too, are something else. like you said, he truly is like a cat purring, his usually deep voice a few octaves lower now he’s relaxed. he’s a little more sensitive at his neck/under his chin, so when you scratch along there, a few moans might even escape him.

when he doesn’t want to ask verbally, it’s usually because he’s embarrassed. he’s embarrassed of being a grown man, asking the decently younger person he’s seeing if he can have some scratches. when he says that in his mind, he sounds pathetic (note: in the future? this changes. you change his way of thinking about a lot of things) so he simply just takes your smaller hand in his, and moves it to his face.

if you’re watching tv, your eyes will move to see his expression which is quite commonly his big doe eyes, staring right up at you. sometimes he’ll even do a little head tilt into your hand, rubbing his beard against it as a plead.

when you finally oblige and your fingers gently scratching along his scruffy beard, you watch as the warm smile makes its way onto his face, eyes closing in content. you watch as the crows feet appear at the side of his eyes, and it tells you how much he’s really enjoying it. it baffles you how he can go from fucking you relentlessly a few hours before, to being one of the softest men you’ve came across.

🫠 NONNIE I LOVED THIS IDEA?? he’s our filthy little fucker but god can he be a soft guy other times. always love and appreciate your thoughts and ideas for this au, and can’t wait to hear from you again!! <3