There's a sudden but gentle knock at their bedroom door, Sharlene's gaze darting up from their phone to see their sister in the doorway.
"Um... Hey," Ami greets, giving a small wave.
"Hi," They respond. "What's up?" As they push themselves up from their bed to sit up properly, Ami's golden eyes widen slightly in surprise, before she loosens the tension in her shoulders with a sigh—both of them knew the only reason she went to their room was if she needed something.
"Um... Can I come in?" She asks. Sharlene furrows their brow, immediately picking up on her anxiety.
"Sure...?" They scoot over slightly to give her some room to sit on the bed, but she only takes a few steps in before closing the door behind her. Ami is frowning, her eyes darting around as she tries to look at anything but them, and with the strange silence looming over the two, they started to get uncomfortable.
"So, listen, Shar..." She eventually begins, bringing a hand up to rub the back of her neck. "You, uh... You have tomorrow off work, right?"
"Yeah." They state simply. "Why? Somethin' wrong?"
"No, no, not... Not wrong, per say, but, um..." Ami presses her lips together, exhaling heavily as she lifts her head, though she still avoids looking at Sharlene directly. "It's just... I have some plans—or, no, we have some plans, and... God, you're not gonna like this. Please, just... Hear me out. Okay?"
Sharlene doesn't say anything. A lump is forming in their throat, anxiety bubbling in their stomach at Ami's words. They had a feeling, a gut feeling that they knew exactly where this was going. Their sister doesn't act like this normally, she's never this nervous.
But surely they were thinking too much, right? There was no way that Sharlene's worst case scenario was exactly what Ami wanted to talk about, right?
"Okay, um..." She eventually mutters. "So... I just got off th' phone with mama."
No way.
"She, um... Tomorrow, she's gonna fly over an' meet us here, then we were gonna go to lunch with her, Carson an' I."
No way.
"Mama said... She... Really wants to see you. I know you don't like her, Shar, but if you could put yer differences aside for an hour or two..." They can hear the meekness in Ami's voice, but it didn't properly register, not when they can hear their heart beat in their ears, not when their chest burned and their throat tightened and their raw anger was the only thing they could feel.
"Are you... fucking kiddin' me?!" It's loud and it's sudden, Ami flinching and quickly reaching up to cover her ears.
"Pl-Please, don't—"
"Don't what? Get fuckin' angry, Ami?! What the hell did you expect?! There's not a chance yer stupid enough to think I'd be fine with this, right?!" Their breathing is heavy, labored, and they clench their jaw and their hands soon find their way to their hair, nails digging into their scalp as they tried to just breathe.
"I... Shar..." Her voice quivered, barely above a whisper, and they were sure she was holding back tears.
"It ain't as easy as just 'putting our differences aside'! I fuckin' hate that woman, and I couldn't give less of a shit if she wants to see me! If she wanted a relationship with me, she should'a thought of that before she decided to beat me as a child!!"
"Pl-Please stop ye-yelling... I'm—I'm sorry...!" Ami's voice is small, and it isn't until now that Sharlene finally lifts their head to see their older sister sniffling and sobbing like a scared little child, because of them.
Because they'd screamed at her. Because they'd gotten angry with her.
Maybe they're more like mama than they thought.
"I can't fuckin' believe you asked me that," They soon mutter, venom drenching their voice. "After everythin' I told you about her, y'think I'd be willin' to just let that go so that she can be happy? What, do you not care about my feelings at all?" Their tone was accusatory, and Ami visibly tensed, frantically wiping the tears off her face.
"Don't say that!" She sobbed. "I didn' mean to downplay yer feelin's, I-I care so much! I just... I wa-want things to be okay with you two... I... I thought..." Ami trails off before erupting into another fit of tears, crying and sniveling as she covers her face with her hands.
Dammit. Sharlene hated making Ami cry.
Deep breath in, hold, and exhale. Their hands drop to their lap, and they tilt their head back to stare up at the ceiling for a moment. God, they really fucked this up, didn't they?
"Ami," They eventually speak up. "'m gonna be out all day t'morrow. So, I'm not gonna see her. Okay?" As they lower their head again, dull eyes rest on their sister, who only nods wordlessly in response. That was good enough for Sharlene.
"Sorry for yellin'." They mutter. "Get out of my room."
They didn't have to ask twice. Ami immediately slipped out the door and slammed it behind her, her crying echoing through the halls of their apartment until she reached her own bedroom.
Ah... When had Sharlene started crying?
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2022 was the year I reconnected with my inner fan. After several years of having been packed up and set in the corner, talking only to herself in hushed tones, she took one look at Bernie Wolfe and Serena Campbell on a windy roof. Suddenly with a great whoosh she was set free again.
Thankfully I remembered that that Tumblr thing was the place for fannishness and not evil birdsite. Maybe it was a google search that brought me here, I don’t know.
And here I found a wonderful set of fun, kind, witty and wicked smart, fannish humans.
Thank you for accepting me into the social circle around the fire of fannish discussion and creation.
And thanks to Serena and Bernie, and Catherine and Jemma for just being!
I can’t wait to see what 2023 will bring!
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