#am i really that much a fucking weirdo? am i that annoying?

[boyentity]

talked to a guy like all night last night and i went on snap to message him again and he fucking blocked me and i really dont know why like?? we were getting along so well i thought..

[medicinemane]

There's honestly... just so many people, just so so so so so many people in this world where I'm like... aren't you people tired of this fucking... you know, I was going to call them clowns but that's really disrespectful to clowns, these people could never get their face on an egg...

Anyway, aren't you tired of this childish jackass? Don't you just want to ignore them and never have to hear about them again? If we just ignored them they legitimately would go away... don't you want that?

And this applies to... just ungodly amounts of people, from jake paul to even elon musk (just... don't touch his shit, he'll run out of money eventually with how bad he is with it), to just... name an annoying famous person and you'll name someone I've literally forgotten right now that I could never have to hear about again if people would just ignore them (unless they committed crimes, investigators are welcome to pay attention while gathering a case)

Yet the answer's always "no, we're paying so much attention to them!" and I'm just like... why? Why would you watch jake paul box? I heard about that and was like "he's still doing that shit?", and yet I guess it made a lot of money yet again and it's just like... ignore him

These people could go away, and yet

[kidpunkjunk]

.

[tardis--dreams]

God i could have such a chill evening if it wasn't for that doctor's appointment tomorrow morning looming over me

[blueberryarchive]

i want reader to call him again...please

𝙢𝙤𝙧𝙚 𝙩𝙝𝙤𝙪𝙜𝙝𝙩𝙨 𝙤𝙣 𝙨𝙡𝙖𝙨𝙝𝙚𝙧!𝙟𝙠

previously on steph's house // later at the game...

tw: mentions of non-con

You've always heard men talk about having called at least once in their life to have sex on the phone. They usually called in groups, mutual support or stupidity, you didn't know which it was.

You knew you always wanted to know how those women could have such rich, soft and daring voices. Even when they laughed it seemed like a well-rehearsed choreography and at the end they said your name as if they knew you down to your bones. You wanted that gift, you would pay for that gift.

Now much more than ever. Or maybe you would like to know how to make another decision as daring as taking the phone from the living room again and hiding it in the bathroom at Steph's house. The girls sleeping upstairs. You should probably go back to bed.

How dare you? You have a boyfriend, for God's sake. And not only that, but with this idiot? You could feel Steph's gaze on the back of your neck, judging your finger to make the final turn.

555-5662

The buzzing is the same, the heavy lump in your throat is not. You knew what awaited you on the other side of the line, it was cruel and disgusting; but you were lying if you said you didn't need to listen a little more.

In the silent night, in the darkness of the chick-yellow bathroom, shame haunts you, warming your ears, your hands on the phone when the soft click was heard on the other side.

"Mm." Was his response, silence was yours. What the hell had you done, were you crazy?

"Fuck," he laughed lowly, "not you again."

"Do you really play?"

"I'm on the team, if that's what you want to know. But I don't think you're adding numbers to your phone bill to ask so much shit, am I wrong?"

You let your forehead cool on the tiles on the wall, is he wrong?

"God, if I had you in front of me…” Jungkook sighed and your heart skipped a beat.

"What?"

"I would force your mouth open to see if you learn to answer people when they talk to you."

"Do you always have music on when you sleep?"

"Are you always such an annoying cunt?"

Your chest burns, your eyes sting.

"You probably have a boyfriend, you all have a lapdog behind you so you don't get bored."

"Please. My boyfriend can kick your ass." You responded quickly, letting the burning spread like burning garbage.

"Are you, then?"

"What?"

"Are you so bored that you have to call the weirdo from college."

"I don't even know why they consider you weird."

This time the laughter was genuine, stupid popular girl, didn't know what she was getting into.

"You would have noticed a while ago if you were in front of me."

"Are you missing teeth or something?" You laughed, chewing on your nails.

"I'd have you bend over with your head on the ground while I split that pussy in two. You'll probably be crying and your little pussy bleeding from the dryness."

"What if I don't want to?" And you cursed yourself for having hesitated, your callgirl career looked even further away.

"Who said anything about wanting?"

And there it was, the heavy knot tied lower, down your stomach to your legs.

"That's illegal."

"Shut up and put your hand between your legs." He interrupted. The smell of detergent was so strong all of a sudden, you looked at your pathetic reflection in the sink mirror.

"You're sick."

"And you're an insignificant whore who calls me at 4 in the morning to listen to my voice and touch herself. Wanting me to tell her exactly what she wants." The stranger growled under his breath. "You're all so spoiled and pathetic, you disgust me."

"Fuck you." Your wet cheeks started to bother you.

Silence, his laughter was lethal, hoarse from hours of interrupted sleep.

"Don't let me find out who you are, callgirl. You gonna' regret it."

Your eyes opened, the darkness and silence were no longer your allies, they now seemed to engulf you. Click, the unbearable tone torturing your ear.

[beheldandcompelled]

Sometimes I think about the fucking impact this must have had on Jon. He wakes up from a 6 month long coma, inhuman. Tim is dead, and Martin refuses to talk to him. And then there's Elias.

Elias was a constant cheerleader to Jon's power. He'd praise him for getting stronger. He wouldn't give him much in the way of answers, but he was always willing to listen to Jon's concerns.

And now Jon's alone and his powers are considered a nuisance by everyone around him unless they're towards other inhumans. But him knowing things is annoying, and compulsion is only beneficial when directed at a threat. Elias was excited when Jon would know something. He even (really) enjoyed compulsion. And now even Elias, the one weirdo Jon had in his corner, refuses to speak to him.

I am unwell by the wreck that is Jonathan Sims in season 4.

[vendetta-ari]

Romeo, Juliet, and a blonde Romeo.

Patrick Zweig x Fem!Reader x Art Donaldson (mentions of sex but no written smut, implied relationship with Art Donaldson, implications of At Donaldson ed (the food kind) cheating?,Reader is a lil bitch, not proofread)

"Hey, i made you breakfast..!" Art chirped as you sat up from your fluffy bed, ever the morning person, the blonde was already dressed and awake- holding a gross looking green smoothie in his hands. somehow, this grown man still has yet to understand what casual means. whatever, free food.

Thanks again for making breakfast," you tap your foot rhythmically against the tile, watching Art pick at his own pancakes and not eat them. "you gonna eat..?"

"not hungry." he quickly bites back, looking away for a moment before meeting your eyes with a soft smile. you pause, and the rythem your leg was bouncing to halts as you question him—"why would you make food if you weren't hungry?" one arched brow later and the blonde is chuckling nervously, cleaning up your empty plate and shrugging frantically "yknow, i. actually don't know- I guess i just wanted to make you something but I didn't want it to be awkward so-"

"Art?"

"yeah?"

"stop acting like my boyfriend."

he stammers a quick apology, before making up some excuse about needing to go to practice. (he doesn't, and you know that too, you aren't dumb.) and just like that, the blonde is gone. you'd feel bad, but this isn't the first time you had to remind him that your relationship is purely just friends (with amazing benefits) who knew pathetic men could have such good dick? after cleaning up the rest of the kitchen you go to your room to change, only to hear a familiar pattern of knocks.

tap-tap, tap-tap-tap-tap-tap, tap-tap.

annoying bastard.

Patrick Zweig.

you open the window anyway. you're a woman of weak morals.

"miss me, baby?" he purrs.

you debate pushing him out the window, but the drop isn't very far.

after rolling your eyes and pulling him through the window, you meet his lips for a kiss. the kind where it's not light or tender and very much sloppy, with tillted heads and kitten licks.

so yeah, maybe you were playing with Patrick and Art. but could you really be blamed?

"hey, what's that?-" Patrick's stupid mouth isn't on your lips, but it's enough to pull you out if the moment, dazed and ticked.

"what's what?" you look around, trying to gage where his eyes have landed now.

Fuck.

Art left his Stanford hat. bright red, almost like a stop sign.

braindead blonde, he's gonna ruin your shot at getting laid (again) today.

"it's nothin, my uh..brother came over today. left his hat."

"am I supposed to belive that?"

God you could pull your hair out right now, you kick the hat under your bed. "can we get back to it?" you snarl, sitting on the bed and pulling him to stand between your legs.

he hasn't budged yet. it's been 5 minutes and he won't even kiss you, the cap is in his hands and he's inspecting it like some sort of fuckin' detective.

"im not fucking you if you don't tell me who's this actually is."

why does that even matter? since when has Patrick ever been monogamous? just last week he asked for a three way between you and this secret somone- the way he described the man though, sounded like he was in love.

"yknow, he's not too skinny, he's fir and built perfectly. white, blonde, he's got those two colored eyes...what's that called again? heterophobia?"

"Patrick i dont care, I'm not trying to get an STD."

"no he's safe, I swear!"

"i said no already!"

Patrick sniffs the hat, like the weirdo he is. you swear his pupils dialate, like a cat.

"what?" you murmur, almost defensively. you didn't mean for it to sound like that- but oh well.

"nothing. I'm going home."

"what? hey!? what about me-"

Art's stupid little hat gets thrown at your face, you sputter and go to chase after Patrick, but he's already hopped out of your window.

well. that's one less good lay.

atleast you've still got Art?

you quickly text him that he left his hat at your place, you make it sound a little flirty too. you didn't just get all worked up for nothing.

Patrick hadn't even stepping foot through the door and Art is already trying to leave.

"look I know we made plans man- but I gotta go do something important!"

"Important like what? whats more important than hanging out with me, am I that insignificant to you?!"

"no- it's not like that, stop being fucking dramatic!"

"just tell me what it is that's soooo important!"

"it's a girl, okay?! I left something at her dorm."

"you're dating—?"

"n-no..not exactly. it's complicated."

manwhore. that's what patrick wants to say. but he relents and let's his best friend get away. as much as he'd love to dig his claws into Art and never let go, no one can resist those eyes.

"fine. go then, just leave, not like I care." He's talking to the air at this point, because Art's already flown off like a puppy hearing a clicker. but hey, maybe Patrick's just being dramatic. he's sure to find some hot chick on campus- right?

maybe Patrick is an idiot. maybe he's a fool for thinking somone as gorgeous as you wouldn't sleep around. but fuck, for once he wanted domone all to himself.

yet here he stands, in Art's doorstep, watching him hold the red Stanford cap he just saw in your house. he isn't overthinking it. underthinking it, if anything. he should really see if he's got an STD.

"so..you're saying she's fucking both of us?" Art finally breaks the silence. looking dejected after Patrick's convoluted explanation when he came back from your dorm.

"dunno. I guess so." Patrick breaks eye contact. he really can't stand to look at his best friend right now. why can't he have anything to himself? why does he always have to share? it's not fair.

He feels like he's back in the tennis academy. sharing his very being with Donaldson. everything he every owned or would own, would be shared. he didn't mind back then, but with a girl like you? call him selfish for wanting you all alone. just his luck.

he needs to prove he's better. for his own fucking sanity.

To be continued.

-xoxo, Ari

[we-fancy-you]

Weirdo

Kuroo tetsuro x f!reader We all know how childish Kuroo sometimes may be, but just know that you won't take his shit every time. NSFW 18+ only established relationship, unprotected sex, creampie, riding, teasing a lot, overstimulation, timeskip!kuroo it's pretty vanilla smut

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“Don’t push like that!” you said while walking to the bathroom. “I’m sorry.” He said with a lying smirk on his face. “You’re not sorry at all! It’s written all over your face!” He gave a soft snicker before groping your but. “Tetsuro! I am serious! You can’t just do this to me when we are having a serious conversatio- “he was mimicking you with a lousy expression while his hand is mocking your mouth. Knitting your eyebrows together you planned on calling him out for it. As a small feeling of rage bubbled in your stomach and you could almost see red.

For some annoying reason he always did this. Whenever I pointed something about the past week that I didn’t like, out. He would start acting like a horny moody teenager.

“Babe, you take life too seriously. Can’t you just let it go?” “You know what you should do. You should grab the spare blanket and pillow because you’re not sleeping in the same bed as me tonight.”  You puffed out. The burning heat in your veins hadn’t cooled off yet and you were stomping out of the room.

“Ahh, don’t say that. You know you can’t sleep without me.” Even though that’s partly true, your pride didn’t give in. He was being a total jerk and you needed to put him in his place. “I am going to give you a nice one to the jaw. Then were going to see what you need.” “I honestly think you can’t even reach my shoulder from down there.”

That’s it, you couldn’t do it. As your face flushed beat red and felt like had gasoline on it waiting to be lit and set everything a blaze. “You.” you slowly turned around on your heels and looked him dead in the eye. He didn’t flinch a bit and only had that stupid fuck boy smirk displayed on his face. The one that says ‘hey to yah sexy ladies. If anyone want some good dick tonight. Hit me up.’

“What did you just say?” Even though everything of your body was burning. Your voice could make Antarctica gasp. “See you have to even bend your neck to look at me now. How are you going to hit me?” Even though this bastard had the same height as a windmill you weren’t scared off by his petty insults. You pushed him as hard as you could against the wall and pulled him down his collar. “You listen here you little shit, I know you have a hard life with all your work and sport on the side but guess what.” You pulled him so close. Your breath was dancing against his. As much as you hated him, he knew how to turn you on and that ruined hairstyle was doing it.

“I too have a job, and yes work out.” He laughed at that part, the hard and ha! Type of kind. “You working out? I think I have a bigger chance of winning the lottery than to see you working out.”

Another vein in on your forehead pulsed with irritation.

“How did you get so full of yourself? Huh? Was it the old ladies that called you handsome? Because I can promise you, they are blind.”

“No, it’s the fact that you always get wet when we fight.”  As you two were in such a heating argument you didn’t notice his long slender fingers travel to my lower parts. The tip of his index finger suddenly pressed on your clothed clit, and a jolt of pleasure hit your body. Gasping and closing your eyes, his other hand brushed the hair out of your face. “You really are the worst.” You huffed out.

With his big arms he picked you up and walked to the bed. He gently placed you down and was about hover over you when you pushed him back. “You know” he looked confused but listened because he obviously wanted to do something about that tent set up in his pants. “Why do you think you are allowed on top? Hmm. You have been very rude and now all of a sudden you want to use me? No.” you slowly whispered in his ear. You got up pushed him down once more on the bed. “Don’t move.” You said while slowly opening your blouse. He was whistling at your action, but it didn’t faze you. You trailed your hand over his shirt from his neck down to his chest that lingered a bit before you pinched his nipple. He tensed up and you s straddled his lap after that. Slowly rocking your hips just to get the smallest amount of friction between the two of you. His hands were at his sides, and you could feel the pent up frustration he has. “I want to be on top tonight.” you said. Your bedroom experiences usually consist of him being on top or behind. So, you being on top is something special. After you said that his smirk deepened.

“You know you’re hot when you are angry right. My dick is so hard.” you blushed harder and tightly held his face in your hands. “Listen boy.” Rubbing his lower lip. “Tonight, we will do all the things I like. And you can’t complain, can’t whine, or cry.” I brushed my lips to his ear and bit his lobe and blowed lightly. “Yes ma’am” he said while he swallowed big time. “I want to tie you up, but since that takes too much effort you have to promise me to keep your hands behind you.” He slowly nodded as you got of his lap and took off the rest of your clothes, leaving you in a black lace under garments. As you untied your hair you saw his eyes drift to your mounds and licking his lips. But that’s not going to happen yet.

You knelt down between his legs not breaking eye contact and undoing his belt. He was hard and you could feel the light twitching through his trousers. While getting it all off and rubbed his big thigh you could feel goose bumps forming beneath your hand. Softly kissing the muscular part up and down making sure to leave hickeys while making your way up to his centre. His eyes were closed, and he now was laying on the bed with his long legs dangling off. I got up and turned him vertically so I could lay in between his legs. He sighed at your cold hands touching his warm stomach and I teased him more. I missed the touch of his lips him, but you couldn’t give up now.

 Tugging his boxers down for the show to start. You were going to make this painfully long for the both of you.

After many times of him cumming on your face and mouth. And seeing the masterpiece of hickeys you left behind on his pelvis and v-line. You took off your own panties and pushed his, still hard surprisingly, dick inside you. It felt good and God you were wet. So wet. The slick sound of him rubbing your walls filled the room. Maybe it was because you where on top or maybe the long-time spend on foreplay, but it felt so good. Tears filled your eyes, and you were just slowly moving up and down. Keeping a steady pace so this was going to take a while, but you were right on the edge. If you opened your eyes right now and look at him the sight of him alone could give you your release. Secretly opening one to look at him. Both your hands were on his abs making small marks from your nails, but his Oh, his were giving you an ego boost. One of his hands was between his teeth and the other was pulling his hair. A hard moan escaped your mouth, and you couldn’t even recognize your voice in it. Your stomach was all tingly and skin was set ablaze, the sweat coating your body and his was making you dizzy. Just to get that push you rubbed your clit and your jaw dropped, back arched, and eyes rolled back. You moved your fingers to his nipples and rubbed them making him twitch inside you he was letting out muffled groans all the time this time a hoarse moan left his mouth, and it was so sexy. And you couldn’t take it anymore. You needed him, to touch you, you needed him to fuck you. “Touch me, Tetsu.” You gasped out and at the exact moment he shot up his hips. Sending ripples of sensations and all types of pleasure through your body. And now loads of sexy moans filled the room, the ones you see in movies. You came but he didn’t quit you tried to tell him to slow down but he didn’t the overstimulation was killing but you couldn’t stop it felt too good at the same time. His warm calloused hand grassed your skin as he found the clips of your bra and threw it to the corner of the room. “Finally.” He muttered as his mouth connected to your nipple. The pleasure and pain messing with your brain. “Tetsu, ah, it’s to-ah, much.” You got out. “Oh yeah? Well, I don’t think you’re seeing these hickeys because they also were too much.” He gave one more thrust when he came again. Delicious warm fluid painted your insides and he finally got soft. The smell of sweat filled your nostrils as you saw him pull out.

Your thighs were shaking, and your insides were spasming. Slowly pushing yourself up you felt the warm mix of your fluids run down your thigh. “You look so hot right now with all my cum down your legs. I just want to-.” He scrapped some of it with his fingers and pushed it back in. The sudden touch on your sensitive area made you see starts. Too braindead to form actual words other than a simple “eh” your half open eyes looked at his golden ones as you tried to caress his cheek.

“Let’s get you cleaned up, shall we.” He picked you up kissed your lips on his way to the bathroom.

Bonus:

The next day Kuroo had his weekly volleyball game with his friends and was walking into the changing room.

A few of his friends were already changing into their jerseys.

“Hey guys.” He greeted them and started changing himself.

“Damn Kuroo, I see yah.” Bokuto snickered. “Hmm?” “Yah got laid good didn’t yah.” He pointed to his stomach. Deep purple bruises were visible as he had removed his shirt. “Oh this.” He scratched the back of his head and laughed sheepishly. “He made her real mad this time.” Kenma said while shaking his head.

[ditizygirl]

Editblr is a breeding ground for idolatry, ableism, racism and so much more all for a community about putting images together.

I've been here for only a year but I feel like I've seen it all, and the excuses oh my god the excuses. You are all 15-19, you should not have the mental capacity of a 8 year old. Your common sense is non existent and almost all of you guys are so fucking stupid it's pissing me off more than any god can understand. You are old enough to have logical thinking skills, you may have a disorder and it may be a reason but not an excuse.

Alot of you have forgotten the saying "Think Before You Talk" and I've sure as hell done alot of thinking. This is my deep dive into editblr.

Ableism

Typing quirks are a way of personal expression but why do so much of you hate to add plain text. I can understand to extent because plain text hates my head because of how long it can be but I'm not gonna act like a little bitch about it. I'm gonna add my typing quirk or even fonts itself to it.

I'm gonna ask someone to help me, or to do it for me. Stopping making excuses for ableism. Alongside with the typing quirks, your psds are ugly and eyestrainy. Psds also fall under racism because I have no idea why you guys are ignoring the fact some make dark skin characters lighter but in the case of ableism most of them are really bright and makes it hard to see.

Orange and brown? Green and yellow? Blue and brown? Why are you putting colours that can be so much eyesore together? And won't even tag as eyestrain and when someone does ask you only do it for one post.

Romanticization

This one is weird as fuck and I see no one mentioning it. Editblr highkey has a ddlg problem, this "little girl" aesthetic you guys have going on borderlines ddlg alot and its icky. The baby talk typing quirk is disgusting, stop it.

I'm not one to judge how someone copes with their trauma but what I DO judge is how you act when majority says its uncomfortable. Now this section I'm a bit unsure how to phrase it, gotta love dyslexia, but that isn't going to stop me.

There's alot of very uncomfortable romanticization of stalking which I've seen so much of alongside abusive relationships and the justification of these things.

Racism

Really can't escape this one unfortunately. Many of you are like kpop idols, you're too dyslexic towards the difference between appropriation and appreciation. Incase you forgot let me remind you.

You can not gift japanese names. Gifting names is a native practice therefore you can only gift native names. Also I've noticed you weirdos befriending people just to use their cultural names. I can't even say it east asian fetishization because its only Japanese.

Also for the love of God can you guys stop saying nonmem and non women especially when referring to sexualities. It's not hard to simply say "queer attraction to women" and "queer attraction to men".

Coming back to the "gifting" names thing, I think it's interesting how all of you conveniently have a Japanese friend who "gifted" you the name of a cute pink anime girl. Maybe I'll do a post later on how much of a bad liar you guys are.

Closed symbols is also another big problem you all have. No matter how much times you're told you can't use something you always cry "but my friend from xyz culture said it was ok!" One person can't speak for a whole culture. You're nothing but a coloinzer in disguise hiding behind the idea of aesthetic. If you want to know if a symbol is closed just use this site.

Goddess Personas

Yea this one is getting a whole section of its own. Like any people I am uncomfortable with goddess personas, especially being someone with biblical sources. Now the idea that a teenager on the internet is making people call them a goddess is strange isn't it?

In my opinion, they're all annoying, copy and paste, and I think not a lot of people talk about how the really bad ones get. You all love to indulge them, make them think they have power over them. You put them on a pedestal and praise them and get surprised when it all goes to their head?

Stop giving 14 years old power, stop indulging in their habits and letting it go their head. Forcing people to refer to you as their goddess? Their Lord and saviour? Their idol? Someone they must listen to? It creates a power inbalance which always leads to the weirdest of manipulation. Also all the engagekiss copiers are so obvious why would you want to copy the identity of a groomer? It says alot of about yourself if that's what you think is ideal.

Callout Posts

Now, personally, I believe that the only reason a callout post happens is because someone was affected, does it not? Very rarely would a callout post would be a fake one, especially if someone has more then one. If you defend someone who has more than one call out post that's on you and you're gonna end up making one some day I can genuine you that. People don't make them for no reason.

This is all I have to say for now. I hope you guys really consider what I have written here, or not, considering the fact you guys have shown multiple times you lack reading comprehension

@starriesse @dollicous @doveinne @firstgf @kiochisato @lamboll @cherryshh @narcbf @lavendergalactic @npditary @sprinkleoverdose @necroangelz @eskeys

[ramen8008]

Cause everyone is doing this apparently

GOD GAMES....BEGIN!

Apollo: so like I know he's got some banger songs but he killed a bunch of sirens. And who's gonna be my band now?

Athena: hey maybe now they will sing without killing others and being killed?

Apollo: yeah I guess if that's true Ody can go

Hephestus: Trust is not given its FORGED (wink wink). He also betrayed his men

Athena: the men were the ones who didn't trust Odysseus. They betrayed Odysseus and stabbed him tf you mean? Also if you let him go he can still BUILD (wink wink) a future with his family

Aphrodite: Your lil Odysseus might claim to love his mom but was gone so long that she died

Athena: Tf? He was busy fighting a WAR and trying to get back home back to her

Aphrodite: maybe he was just too busy being prideful. He should suffer

Athena: BOOM QUICK THOUGHT

Ares: really Athena?

Ares: Don't mess with my girl also Odysseus is a coward trying to be smart. He's just a lil Twink like his son

Athena: OKAY DON'T YOU DARE INSULT HIS SON. HES MY BOY AND HES GOT MORE BALLS THAN YOU! And tell "your girl" that what she said was stupid

Athena: and if you really want bloodshed then let him go and he'll kill all those weirdo suitors he's already in his monster rawr rawr phase

Ares and Aphrodite: geez okay let him go

Hera: *dancing to disco* I just need one reason to let him go but the main challenge is that you have to.....DANCE

Athena: shit

Hera: Now why should your lil Ody get to be free? *Dances*

Athena: *thinks* do I really care about him this much?

Athena: *sighs and dances* he's smart

Hera: hmmm

Athena: he's an annoying lil trickster *dance move*

Hera: ... Girl that doesn't help *dance move*

Athena: uhh he's kinda funny? That has to do something I can't believe I admitted that *dance move*

Hera: eh

Athena: he's not a fucking cheater (like dad) and a total simp for his wife

Hera: *gasps* husband goals *side eyes Zeus* release him

Athena: So I won-

Zeus: Do you not know you I am? I'm a child and imma throw a tamper tantrum cause you aren't allowed to win wah wah *BOOM lightening bolt*

[kitthepurplepotato]

Chapter 9 - A bubbly experience 🫧

Summary: Katsuki acts like a good fucking husband. That’s the summary.

Warnings: swear words, Reader and Katsuki are sharing a bath naked, mentions of being aroused but no smut at all. They only kiss. Pinky promise.

16+ but let’s make it 18+ for safety.

First Chapter Master List

~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~

Ahh. The sun is up already. You really fucking hate existing right now. Being in this condition is already bad enough, but the mornings are the worst of it all; waking up feels like coming back from hell after going through 300 different kinds of torture.

“Just end my suffering.” You mumble to yourself, completely forgetting that you are not alone.

“It’s five fucking AM, shut the fuck up.” Comes the sweet answer from your side; Katsuki’s hair tickles the back of your neck as he snuggles into you as much as he can, probably trying to cancel out the light and the noise at the same time. His arms tighten around your middle possessively, pulling you as close as humanly possible, absolutely ignoring the fact that there are some parts of him that you weren’t completely ready to feel at “five fucking AM” in the morning as Katsuki would say. “You need somethin’? Water? Toilet? Anythin’?” He mumbles after his mind caught up with the situation. People can say whatever they want about Katsuki being a terrible boyfriend material, but those people don’t fucking see him all soft and mushy and caring and affectionate….

“Nah, I have everything I need right here.” You stroke his hands sitting on your belly with a lovesick smile on your face.

“That was so fucking cheesy.” Katsuki GIGGLES and takes a deep breath, his nose deep in your hair. “You smell like shit.” He snorts, but you can feel that he’s still smiling.

“Stop smelling me then, weirdo.”

“Nah, I love it.” Katsuki grins. Your heart skips a beat.

Honestly. This man is something else. You kinda want to go on a gossip site and leave an anonymous message about Dynamight’s soft side. The fan girls would eat that shit up for sure.

“You will be the death of me.” You mumble into your sheets with a red face.

“I’m literally keeping you alive right now.” Katsuki retorts proudly. “Now shut up and sleep, I’m not ready for this shit.”

“What shit?” You ask, confused.

“Living.”

Fair deal.

Early morning conversations with Katsuki are certainly your new favorite things in the whole world.

~•💥•~

“Wake up, you lazy shit.” Katsuki grumbles, clearly annoyed. The lovely scent of freshly brewed coffee hits your nose and that’s enough for you to have the energy to open your eyes and lean towards the lovely scent; you kinda resemble those dogs smelling bacon while they sleep in those funny videos on YouTube but you can’t be bothered to be ashamed of yourself right now; being in this condition is already enough of an embarrassment anyway. “I brought your breakfast in today but I hate when people eat in bed so this is the last time, got it?”

“Yes, boss!” You take the coffee from Katsuki’s hands automatically, but he takes it away with a disappointed look on his face.

“Did you really forget why I’m bringing you breakfast to bed?”

“Because you love me?” You answer self-deprecatingly.

Katsuki only sighs.

“What’s the time?” He mumbles. Well, that’s a really stupid question to ask right now, but okay; you reach towards the nightstand to check your phone. Surprisingly, the device stays in your hand for quite a long time before your arms give in and the phone falls into your lap.

“Oh. Yeah. I forgot about that for a second.”

You are such an idiot sometimes, honestly. Being in love really makes you stupid.

“How are you feelin’?” Katsuki mumbles as he slowly sits down next to you with the tray of food. It looks phenomenal, just like everything Katsuki makes.

“You worry too much, Kats.” You smile at the hero but he only rolls his eyes at that.

“I ain’t worried, you would even survive the fucking plague. I just don’t want a coffee stain on my mattress, that’s all.”

“Sure.” You giggle to yourself while Katsuki slowly feeds you the pancakes even thought you are quite sure your arms work just enough to take the fork and feed yourself, even if it would be a bit slow.

For some weird reason, Katsuki looks content. He cuts the pancake into small pieces, prolonging the whole thing like he wants to enjoy this for longer than it’s needed, he tilts the coffee mug gently and slowly as he lets you drink the super sweet caramel coffee he made just for you and when the food is gone he makes sure there isn’t a single stain on your face by wiping your lips with a napkin but the touch feels so gentle, it feels like a caress; Katsuki acts the opposite of his usual self but somehow, it feels more genuine than his angry grumbles. After breakfast, Katsuki asks you to stay in bed while cleans up the mess; he comes back a few minutes later, his face determined; whatever he’s about to say the only acceptable answer is YES.

To be fair, that’s fine. It’s not like there is anything you wouldn’t do for this man…

“Your smelly ass is gonna have a bath and I’ll help.”

… Nevermind. Scratch that.

“Fuck no.”

Wait, wait, wait. You haven’t even seen each other naked yet. You haven’t even… well… you haven’t done the deed or anything like that, the most intimate thing between you two was when you touched the hem of his boxers at his parent’s house and he absolutely hated it. You are still not completely over the fact that he hated it, by the way. You understand why, but it still hurts like a bitch! There is no way you can get naked in front of him and…

“Fuck yes.” Katsuki retorts. “The bath is ready and it’s super bubbly, so I won’t see shit. Come on.”

The blonde acts like a stubborn dad, his arms already under your armpits to pull you up.

“Katsuki, put me down, I need a moment.” You yelp as he puts you on his shoulders like a sack of potatoes, barely listening to your anxious retorts.

“The more you think about it the worst it’s gonna be. Let’s get over with this. You trust me, don’t you?”

That was a fucking low-blow. Emotional manipulation, that is. Fuck’s sake.

You know you are freaking out over nothing; you are both adults and both heroes, full of scars that will never fade. He knows how you look like under all the oversized clothing; fuck, Katsuki have kissed most of your scars in his room right before you two made your way to meet Katsuki’s parents. It’s just…

This is not how you wanted him to see you for the first time. You are not a romantic person and you definitely had a hunch Katsuki isn’t either so you kinda imagined your first time to happen out of the blue, hands wondering a bit too far, unable to stop and then things just happen… you thought the first time he sees you naked will be the time you two decide to take the next step; when you are too busy and too excited to really take in the sight. Somehow, this whole situation makes you feel so fragile and insecure, it actually clouds your mind enough you almost make the blonde stumble as you reach out for the door frame to make him stop.

Coming here was a mistake. A big fucking one at that.

Katsuki sighs but he doesn’t let go yet; he strokes your back soothingly, silent for a moment then slowly takes a step forward until your arms give in and hands falls, your whole body giving in to the fatigue. A sweet scent fills your lungs when you take a deep breath; cinnamon, caramelized sugar with a citrusy undertone; it smells like Katsuki but not really; the scent is more fresh than Katsuki’s usual scent and it’s much stronger.

“If you really don’t want to, I’ll put you back to bed.” Katsuki’s confidence clearly wavers as he puts you down on the toilet seat. He hands you your toothbrush, not even trying to force you to do anything anymore; the guy looks heartbroken to be honest, and you absolutely hate seeing him like this and you hate the fact that YOU made him feel like this even more. You quickly wash your teeth while Katsuki stands by the door, clearly in his own little world, probably deciding between leaving or staying. He takes one step forward and one step back, just how he did yesterday when he wasn’t sure if sleeping together was okay or not.

For you, it was so obvious that it’s okay yet he still managed to waver and overthink the whole situation; Bakugou Katsuki might look like an over-confident asshole but deep inside he’s just as uncertain as you are.

You spit out the toothpaste and Katsuki appears by your side right away; he takes the toothbrush from you, cleans your mess up without a single retort and he’s just about to leave the room when your mind finally clears out enough to see how stupid you are being right now.

“Can you stay? I want you to stay.” You mumble into the awkward silence; your cheeks feel burning hot so you are quite sure your whole face is as red as a tomato, but it doesn’t really matter right now. “I want to try and get in alone. I feel like I’m not as weak as I thought I’ll be, which is a good sign but I want to be sure. Will you catch me if I fall?”

“Of course, you idiot.” Katsuki mumbles but he doesn’t roll his eyes this time. He turns away and closes his eyes, probably listening to his surroundings so he can catch you without even looking; his face is determined like he’s about to fight the final boss blind and seeing him like this makes you feel so many things at once; adoration, gratitude, pure love and trust towards the person who’s willing to do all of this for his girlfriend of a few weeks without a single nasty retort. Bakugou Katsuki is not a person who wills to shape himself to fit anyone’s expectations, not even All Might’s, yet here he is, soft and pliant, only an arms length away, listening, understating and trying his best to do what makes you feel the most comfortable in this fucked up situation. You are sure this is not how he wanted this to go either; he also had to have his own daydreams about the day you two tear down another wall between you, but he doesn’t complain, doesn’t say a word, just goes with the flow and let’s you take over, even if it kills him inside.

If you didn’t know Katsuki’s words were true before, you definitely know the truth now; he wouldn’t do any of this if he wouldn’t love you as much as you love him. The realization hits you like a truck and butterflies erupt in your chest as you slowly take your shirt off, then your pajama pants until you shakily stand, completely naked, right next to the bath tub. You sit down on the rim, take in the sight of the thick layer of bubbles, one of your hands playing around with them while the other hides your breasts. You take another deep breath and move your leg into the tub, followed by the other; the bath is a little too hot but at least it burns away the remaining of your anxiety.

“Fuck, I made it in. Alone. On the first day.” You mumble excitedly while you try to make a little wall in front you with the bubbles in the bath. “This is huge, Katsuki. I might be able to be a hero again.” You don’t even realize you started crying in the middle of your sentence until Katsuki mumbles “fuck” under his nose and makes his way to sit on the side of the bathtub with you. He leans in to put your foreheads together and takes a deep breath; the action makes you blush like a teenage schoolgirl, way too aware of the fact that you are laying in a massive bathtub, naked.

“I told you, you are a fucking tank. You’ll kick your weakness in the ass and come back twice as strong. I fucking knew it. Fuck, I’m so proud of you.”

There are butterflies everywhere now; in your chest, in your tummy, in your heart, right in the middle; Katsuki’s natural scent fits so perfectly with the scent of the bubble bath, sweet but spicy; you are rendered utterly speechless when Katsuki moves away just so he can look into your eyes, his gaze deep and so-so fond it makes your stomach squirm. You swear your heart explodes under the pressure and puts itself back together at the same time when Katsuki leans back in to leave an agonizingly slow and deep kiss on your lips while he pushes his shirt up and pulls it through his head in one swift move, not even giving you enough time to understand the situation before he barges back in for another one. He still fiddles with something but you are too content to let your mind wander about what the heck is happening; in the next few seconds, something heavy plops into the bath tub, right next to you. You open your eyes and your breath hitches; Katsuki is in his underwear, his legs already in the water, slowly moving towards your other side until he sits down right next to you, skin touching skin when he snakes his arms around your middle. He hides his face in the crook of your neck, leaving a few chaste kisses there, his body tense and anxious but he doesn’t give in to the tension; he takes a deep breath and tries to relax, but he’s clearly not as chill about this as he tries to make it look like.

“I heard that having a bath together helps people who struggle with the whole intimacy thing. I thought I might try it. Should have asked first though.” He mutters into your neck apologetically.

“You don’t need to ask.” You answer with a heavy blush. “Can I put my arm behind you? Is that okay?”

Katsuki squirms for a second but he takes another deep breath to relax himself.

“Yeah. I think I’m ready.” He says and you can’t help but giggle at that.

“Katsuki, you make it sound like I’m asking you to let me pinch your nipples! You are doing okay. You are okay. You can also say no. It’s fine.”

Katsuki’s face contorts into a frown and you start to get a bit anxious about his behavior; maybe this was a bit too much for him, maybe you should just ask him to leave and have a breather… he’s done so well already there is no reason to push himself.

“Can I.. clean you up instead? I want to wash your back. I think.” He mutters shyly. Bakugou Katsuki is being shy. Oh damn, what did you do to deserve this shit?! You nod silently, not wanting to ruin the intimate mood; Katsuki takes a brand new bottle of shower gel in his hand which has his own logo on the front and pours some into a shower puff. “I made this deal with this cool natural cosmetic shop from England. They wanted to do a collab with the top 10 heroes. This is the first prototype.” He mutters under his nose and slowly leans forward with the puff in his hands. “Deku made a bath bomb and the shower gel, they smell like pine and something sweet. It’s quite weird but whatever. Todoroki couldn’t decide what scent to go for so he has two shower gels, one peppermint and one spicy one. The spicy one is really nice.”

You are not sure if you are supposed to say anything or not; it seems like Katsuki is mostly muttering to himself, probably trying to calm down by filling the silence with random words so the situation doesn’t feel that intimate. Katsuki is struggling but the more he moves the puff around, the more content he gets. He stops abruptly when he gets to your breasts; he stops right where the skin starts to bounce and stays there, frozen. Instead of words, you decide to give him consent with an action; your hand comes up to cover his, slowly moving his hands around your chest while you leave tiny kisses on his shoulders to reassure him.

“I… well… My shower gel…” Katsuki stutters, his eyes big as saucers. If this wouldn’t be so hard for him you would definitely make a virgin joke. “Do you remember when you said you like the smell of my pillow?” Katsuki’s hand moves down to your belly.

“Yeah.” You sigh, trying your best not to get too excited from his touches. It’s not going well.

“I told them I want my shower gel to smell like my sweat. It sounds disgusting now that I said it out loud but I wanted to make it… for you… but whatever. It’s not important. Just… fuck off, don’t look at me like that!” Katsuki moves away with a grumpy pout on his face.

Needless to say, you are five seconds away from crying.

“When… when did you start working on this?” You ask, voice wavering. You won’t cry. You will fucking push through this without a single tear drop. You can do this.

“Six… months ago.” Katsuki’s face is the color of Midoriya’s sneakers and so are his ears. You make a tiny little squeaky noise. “Yes, months before we actually… became a thing, shut the fuck up now and gimme your legs.”

“Fucking marry me, Katsuki. Right now.”

Katsuki can make explosions under water. In case you wondered. They also die right away for obvious reasons and something bubbles up to the surface, so it ends up looking like he just farted underwater. It’s quite hilarious.

“We need to live together for at least a few months before we marry to make sure we can share a space without killing each each other.” Katsuki says like he’s reading it from the news paper. He grabs your leg under the water and yanks it up aggressively; you yelp and laugh at the same time when he rubs your skin with the same aggression; finally, Katsuki feels more like himself.

“Did you Google that before?” You giggle as he swaps your legs over. Katsuki only grunts, his cute little ears on fire.

“Fuck off. You look really nice from this point of view by the way.” Katsuki gives you the biggest shit eating grin when his words finally sink in; he clearly enjoys your misery as his grin grows bigger and bigger as he crawls over you, his hands on the rim of the bath tub.

This might be a really inappropriate thought when you can’t even move your arms properly but Bakugou Katsuki is the definition of sexiness as the water drips down on his abs, the droplets cold on your shoulders when they plop on your skin. Hell, you wouldn’t even think twice about pushing him back into the water and crawl all l over him if you wouldn’t be in this condition.

Hm, maybe this water needs to be cooled down a bit. It’s way too hot in here.

You do your best to move your arm and touch his sides at least; you crave the feeling of him, you crave it so much it actually hurts but maybe that’s just the fatigue; your hand finds the hem of his underwear at his back and you decide to try your luck; you slowly pull down the fabric, making sure you don’t touch anything too inappropriate and keep an eye contact the whole time. Katsuki’s eyes darken for a moment, his chest rigid and unmoving as though he forgot how to breathe; he bites his lips and takes another deep breath, his body slowly moving away from you to sit back to his original place. Okay, that was too much. Roger that. Let’s take a deep breath; you definitely need it.

If you thought Katsuki can’t surprise you any more, well… you were wrong; he removes his underwear under the water in one swift move, and throws it on the floor.

“You happy now?” He moves towards you to give you a chaste kiss on the lips, then another, and another.

“Are you?” You retort, genuinely confused by the sudden change in Katsuki’s behavior. Is he really okay with this? Are you okay with this?! Why does it feel so natural? Alright, it definitely does not feel natural as your heart is about to explode and run away to Narnia through Katsuki’s bathroom cupboard but…

“I think I like sharing a bath with you. I want to do this every fucking day.” Katsuki grins. He looks so happy and content in this position, cuddling into you from the side… you feel the urge to tangle your legs together but you try your best not to act on that urge; there is no way you can avoid touching his private parts in that position.

Not like you would mind…

Oh damn.

You need to take another deep breath then drink a lot of water when you get out. You seem to be a bit thirsty.

“Okay, let me wash myself and let’s get out before I combust.” Katsuki grumbles as he pours a bunch of shower gel on the puff again.

“Can I not help?” You pout at the blonde.

“Maybe tomorrow.” He WINKS and finishes as quick as it’s humanly possible while you gawk at him with mouth half open.

Yes. This man will certainly be the death of you.

… next chapter!

~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~

Potato ramble:

- Sorry for the long wait, I swear I’m trying 😭 My new work schedule is kicking me in the ass. Hopefully, I’ll get used to it eventually, I’m already making some progress!

- I hope you liked this chapter, I had this idea in my head for ages and I couldn’t wait to finally write it down! I love this version of Katsuki so much.

Likes, comments and reblogs are more than appreciated! Send me your thoughts about the chapter in the comments 💜💥

TL:

@sixxze @iwannahaveaprettyaesthetic @hanatsuki-hime @cloroxisadelectabletreat @cheesenmax @coffeent @smolsleepybat @therealpotatobish @qardasngan @canarystwin @unofficialmuilover @nanamomo1 @mikestuffffs

[crushedsweets]

what would BENs thoughts about the others be and what would their thoughts on him be? (I have a theory that Tim is just in the corner like "why am I surrounded by traumatized teenagers and children what the Fuck")

AHH OK I HAVENT DONE A POST LIKE THIS IN FOREVERRRRRR ill try to be quick cuz i have dinner planned soon. everything is specific to my au

toby: sibling-like relationship! it started with toby being freaked out by ben (toby has a serious issue with ghosts . LMAO) and ben making fun of him for it until toby eventually warms up to ben. in which case toby starts picking on him now. which is all fun and games till ben gets mad. overall, they have a pretty positive relationship and ben has helped toby get out of trouble countless times - but it gets kinda awkward/tense after toby and jeff start beefing

brian: brian was one of the first people to get involved with ben! he was the one who encouraged the sorta "he could be really useful to us" idea to slendy/the other proxies. ben thinks hes a good guy and is pretty happy to help brian out, but theyre not really friends - moreso friendly coworkers.. ?

tim: he's really uninvolved in the paranormal aspects of his job...so he strays far away from ben. HOWEVER, they have still spoken and ben thinks tim is just kinda boring and has a stick up his ass. tim thinks ben is a freak

kate: ben thinks shes boring and a weirdo. kate thinks hes annoying and obnoxious. they rarely interact because the jobs kate takes up (patrolling the forest, bringing slendy 'meals', pinning up pages) doesnt really need bens help (cctv footage, etc). but i like to think he eventually helps her get some footing in the real world... maybe by wiping away her missing persons report so she can use her SSN and stuff for jobs.

clocky: she just feels really sad for him. she thinks of him like an annoying little brother(esp cuz she feels that way towards jeff) and she'd be one of the first(if any) to know what happened to ben, how he died, why he looks like that. and it would break her heart, cuz he's just a kid and needed someone to protect him and while they dont really share many experiences, she just feels so strongly and protective over any kid whos been hurt. ben thinks shes a total badass and loves when she hangs out with him, BUT he thinks she also has a stick up her ass at time cuz she'll get snappy if hes being too annoying

EJ: realizing ben is just everyones brother damn... he reminds EJ of one of EJ's siblings, from before the sacrifice. it kills him i think. ben and jeff often go to EJ's place and just lounge around and bother him, but EJ is secretly grateful to have some people making noise and hanging out at his house - reminds him of home. ben thinks hes cool and is always very fond of other paranormal folk, thinks theyre the only ones who can REALLY understand him. something about losing your humanity, or whatever.

sally: not a lot of things can get ben very emotional or sentimental, but sally does. he understands her pretty well, both having been betrayed and killed by someone they trusted - and while they really dont have much in common and therefore dont spend much time together, i like to think they have a really deep connection that sorta transcends anything mortal. its pretty somber, but its nice to not feel so alone

jeff: thats his BFF4L. theyve gone months being totally glued to the hips. constantly laughing and making fun of eachother and doing stupid shit and just being like. AGAIN. BROTHERLY LOL. theyre just here for a good time not a long time and bens saved jeffs ass many a time.

jane: she barely knows of him. he entirely avoids and tries to hide his entire existence from her (cuz of jeff), but since jane takes care of sally, she's vaguely aware.

liu: same as jane, ben avoids liu and has no reason to interact with him

ann: she thinks hes an insufferable brat. LOL. she doesnt like kids and she especially doesnt like him. i dont think they really hang out or have reasons to interact...

dina: same thing with ann LOL

lulu: i think theyve bumped into eachtoher a few times and lulu would give ben the creeps!! hes probably mostly just like Hm. weird. and then leaves her to wander. she doesnt have enough memories of him to have an opinion

lazari: loves him, loves playing games with him. ben and jeff will get her to say swear words and it makes EJ hella mad

nina: she thinks hes so adorable (like 'DAWW LET ME PINCH YOUR CHEEKS') little brother adorable. he has a huge stupid crush on her, but she doesnt know about it. and obvi wouldnt reciprocate it, but its kinda like dipper having a crush on wendy in gravity falls ? eventually hes like JEFFFFF YOURE FUMBLINGGG YOURE FUMBLINGGGGGG when jeff treats nina like shit, but he does literally nothing to actually help ninas situation. i think he feels bad for her, but he also is like "well you did this to yourself..so like..." . so. its complicated basically.

[autisticlancemcclain]

What’s your most hated fandom characterization for each of the main 7?

hoo boy am i glad you asked. although i’m gonna be real, my issue is less with fandom characterization, because you do you i don’t give a shit, and more with how people go batty if you personally are not a fan of fanon characterizations.

like, lemme be obvious and talk about my biggest example. i am a brown eyed lance truther. we know this. the amount of weirdo comments, weirdo DMs, and weirdo asks i get is atrocious. i post a lot of them bc they’re so stupid they’re funny but the amount of people per week that tell me to kill myself is lowkey wild. the amount of people that love to say some variation of “i liked your fic but you ruined it by making lances eyes brown! his eyes are blue!” and i’ve checked other brown eyed truther’s fics — either they delete their comments better than me, or they do not get the same thing. idk what the deal is lol.

i will concede to the point that i’m a contrarian and annoying about it, but a list of the following non-fanon headcanons/characterizations i hold that have been commented on in some derisive way:

- bitchy hunk (lol)

- non “cinnamon roll too pure and baby and good for this world” hunk*

- allura is a good character (🤡)**

- allura is a sweetheart

- allura is not a drill sergeant

- kuron was a good iteration of shiro

- red paladin lance/black paladin keith/blue paladin allura

- retired shiro

- pidge is not cruel

- pidge is not an infant and can handle things a regular 14-15 year old can handle

- small details are irrelevant (think lances family, exact prekerb details, etc)

- keith gyeong and lance sanchez

- fucking brown eyed lance. i’m saying it again

- tall keith

- non omega keith***

- readmores

- autistic lance

- adhd keith

- non asshole/cruel keith

- comphetting gay lance****

- shallura

- bi shiro, demi keith, essentially any sexuality headcanon that isn’t mainstream

- hunk who isn’t food obsessed

- that’s about it

*stop infantilising hunk

**the allura hate is ridiculous and largely rooted in anti-Blackness. it should not be a fight to say that she had a reason to feel betrayed by keith’s heritage, that she did not “get in the way” of klance, that her death was stupid and ridiculous, that she is often pushed over in favour of klance (not as in she’s less popular, but that her/her death are used as a plot device to further klance), and that she is as interesting, nuanced, and multifaceted as the rest of them.

***people, inevitably, feminize characters in fandoms (largely because many people in fandom are young women, i know i feminize characters simply bc i’m making them like me and i’m feminine lol), and my issue is that people (in the general sense, not everybody) love to feminize keith and then get really mad if anyone else is feminized. this is not about fem or trans woman keith btw. this is about people omega-ifying him and then losing their MINDS if i don’t share that headcanon.

****i literally only wrote this once and then never again because people lost their minds. but as much as i love bi lance, i think it’s interesting that usually, when we see “boy crazy” or “girl crazy” characters, especially if they have a lot of chemistry or homoerotic tension with a same-gender character, people are like oh ya that’s comphetting. that character is desperately trying to outrun the gay thoughts. but with lance, who was definitely girl crazy and cared more about having a girlfriend than actually dating and falling in love (think “mrs blue lion” — he didn’t give a fuck about who he was marrying, so long that it was a girl), calling him gay will have people saying you’re erasing bisexuality. as if he was not fucking straight in the show. so.

sorry this is so bitter and ranty lol. been in a mood

[paviastrashyrings]

can i request a horropedia x reader with the “rude to everyone but loving to their partner” trope? (reader is the rude one)🫶🏻 male reader if possible

More of the lovely Nerdy Nerd? How could i possibly say no. Thank you for your submission and it is absolutely my pleasure to serve you. (side note: could not be more on the nail for how i am irl)

Without further ado, dear readers, lets get into another dream with Horropedia.

You were...rough around the edges, so to speak. Uncaring and cold towards most people.

If someone touched you, you'd snap at them. If someone came at you with an attitude, you'd match it.

Everyone associated with you was used to your foul mouth and bad mood.

Except one person, of course.

He had never understood why everyone spoke so poorly of your behavior until he witnessed first hand how "grouchy" you were with others.

"Hes not so bad." he'd try to defend you, scratching the back of his head with a sheepish smile.

"Dude he literally insulted me to my face because I bumped into him." one coworker recalls, angered by the mere memory.

It wasnt like you were trying to be mean, people just dont have spatial awareness.

They were right there.

Nothing pushed them into you.

They didn't even trip.

They just were dumb and didn't look where they were going. That's on them.

He would listen to you recall your side of the story, your tone soft and even because it was him.

"We really gotta work on your...people skills." he hums, but in complete honesty he was impressed how you were so able to stand your ground.

One day, someone decided to really push their luck. Yapping about how annoying "that weirdo, horropedia or whatever that guys name is" was.

Safe to say you were pissed, and he was in their direct vicinity too.

once you noticed that he was RIGHT THERE being spoken ill about?

"Who the fuck do you think you are?" you spat with malice, turning around so fast people would assume you were facing them the whole time.

You went off of them, until Joshua stepped in, equally shocked but also mildly amused by the expression on the culprits face.

"woah hey, no need to get angry." There was full and ardent need to get angry, they just insulted him to his face and he was just gonna take that? hell no, not on your damn watch.

He turns around and politely apologizes to the culprit, "So sorry about that, hes trying to work on his temper.."

He guides you away, still secretly impressed by your anger. Nobody really ever defended him like that, especially in front of a whole establishment full of people.

"I mean seriously can you believe them? Talking shit about you like that in front of you?" you'd start almost as soon as the culprit was out of earshot, just to keep him happy. You wouldn't have cared if they had heard you, you already spat so much profanity in their direction anyways.

"You know it happens all the time, I'm not exactly a stranger to it." which you couldn't understand. How does he tolerate such blatant disrespect, I mean sure he's a little strange and nerdy but that doesn't hurt anyone.

"Yeah but you don't deserve that, you didn't even do anything." you'd murmur, looking away. You look like a scolded dog, which he thought was adorable.

What he didn't remark on was the clear difference in how you spoke to others and how you spoke to him.

you were still frustrated, temper still on high, and yet you held back profanity and sulked instead of snapping at him.

He definitely noticed though, you were so sweet to him that it was hard not to notice.

He'll let you off for just this once, but the next time he catches you he'll have to scold you properly.

He won't admit that he's enjoying the special treatment, he's happy you care about him so much.

but maybe tone it down a little?

Only sometimes though

Well, this one was very fun to write. Thank you once again, dear readers, your support and kind words mean the world. We will dream once again, come find me soon <3. signed, yours forever Moon.

[ninthskzmember]

Birthday, debut.

Word count: 1,9k.

Warnings: Kind of suggestive, a few curses, kind of fluff too.

a.n: Hi, you can call me MoonJin, I'm 23 years old and this is the first thing I am publishing. I'm really open to constructive criticism! You all can suggest me anything, and make requests too! Hope you like it. If this gets some kind of support, I'll probably make a part two. I'm so full of ideas!

July 20th, 2019.

“Moonlight, wake up.” Minho moved my legs softly, trying to wake me up. I could feel the masculine cologne in the room.

“Just five more." I rolled over to the other side of the bed, facing the wall.

“It's your solo debut day... Happy birthday, by the way.” I could hear his cheeky smile, making me smile too. I turned around, and I could see his cute, swollen face from sleeping.

“Thank you, Min.” I answered as he handed me something in the dark room, the only light coming from the almost closed door that takes you to the aisle where the other room is and then to the living room.

“Jagi-ah, happy birthday!" Hyunjin entered the room where Minho and I were with a bouquet of roses in hand, opening the door widely.

Minho and I covered our eyes in pain for the sudden hit of light after being in the dark—and asleep—for so long.

“Hwang Hyunjin, you did not have to do that." I scolded the tall one, as if he were not my sunbae.

“I know you love this kind of thing even if you try to hide it, Moon. Now you have to wake up; it's a big day in numerous ways. NINETEENS KITSCH”

The boy who is only a few months older than me is way more excited than my oppa sitting right at the side of my legs, still with his hand on my thigh from when he tried to wake me up, and I still have his gift in my hands.

“Thank you, Jinnie.” I laughed it off. “Put those in the water; I'm waking up right now.” The two pairs of eyes followed my movements as if I were some kind of weirdo. “What?”

Minho and Hyunjin looked at each other and just made some type of grin.

“Am I missing something?”

“How are you so calm?” Minho talked after a while. “When we have a comeback, you can barely shut the fuck up." He joked, and Hyunjin laughed out loud.

“I know I should be excited... And I am! I'm just... To me, you know, you guys are my everything. I know a lot of idols can't wait for their solo debuts, but, to me, it is missing eight nineths of me. I have so much fun on stage... I'm just worried I won't like it that much.” It was my turn to give a worried grin.

“Yeah, Hyunjin-ah can take it from here." Minho got up and left the room, making me laugh. That's classic Lee Know.

"Angel,” he made his way to me once we were alone after leaving the bouquet on top of my bed, even though the door was still open. “We might not be up there on stage with you, but the eight of us will be looking proudly at our girl.” He smiled sweetly at me while hugging me by the waist, pulling me closer to him.

“I know you know I know, but not everybody knows, so you should close the door at least." Felix's deep voice made it's way to our ears, and we looked at him, closing the door behind him. “Happy birthday, you annoying cunt.” My best friend did let out the brightest smile ever and opened his arms to me as I made my way to him, winning a whine from Hyunjin.

”Get over it, Hwang. She prefers me still.”

“Don't fright over me. There's enough MoonJin for everybody.”

“WHERE'S THE YOUNG LADY?" Changbin slammed open the door with so much energy that you could tell he's had a ton of caffeine, and it's not even 7 a.m.He was followed by an equally energetic Jisung.

When I see them being chaotic, I can't help but think about Crash and Eddie from The Age of Ice. The cartoon.

"I think that's me." I raised my hand shyly.

"HAPPY BIRTHDAY!" The two of them screamed and took me from Felix's arms, who was still holding me, making a me-sandwich in between them.

“You'll kill her with your tits,” a chill Seungmin was supported by the door's frame. “You'll suffocate the birthday gal."

"She'll die happily.” Jisung added, and everybody started laughing, except for Hyunjin, whose moment with him was long forgotten.

"What's so funny?” The maknae appeared out of the blue.

“Your face." Seungmin responded with the same aura as before "Who gave you this?" He took the roses from the bed.

"Who else would?" Felix raised his eyebrows and pointed at himself, making me smile as I flashed a glance at the original person who brought it to me.

“What's got you all moody, Hyung?" Jeongin saw the movement of my eyes.

"I was wishing her a happy birthday first."

"Actually, the first one was Minho Oppa." I teased and heard a chuckle from Felix.

"He remembered?" Jeongin asked, surprised.

"Just because she's debuting today." Seungmin answered calmly.

"Well, anyway, thank you all so much for your birthday wishes... I have to get ready for the day. Thank you so much, Felix, for the bouquet." I stated, as I started pushing everyone out of the room.

"Hey, this is my room too." Changbin crossed his arms on top of his chest.

"Yeah, and mine." Felix added.

"CHRIS OPPA, THEY'RE NOT LETTING ME GET READY, AGAIN." I screamed over to our leader, whose appearance was immediate.

"Happy birthday, sunshine." he said as he gifted me a small box with a bright smile on his face.

As I opened the thing, you could see a little moon hanging from a thin chain, everything covered in gold.

"Oppa, you didn't have to..." I pouted as I went ahead and hid on his chest, and he wrapped his arms around me, still smiling adorably.

"I know I didn't, but I wanted to. You're always working hard. Just a little way to show gratitude." He kissed the top of my head.

"Thank you so much. I really appreciate this. I won't ever take it off." I smiled while taking the thing out of the box, handing it to him, and turning on my back so he could put it on my neck.

I made eye contact with Hyunjin, whose face was still in a frown. Felix pouting at the moment between our leader and me, and Changbin hugging him.

"There you are." Chris took my hair and placed it on my back again. "Now, the three of you get the fuck out of here and let the girl get ready for her big day." He looked at the guys, one by one. "What even are you doing here?" He asked with a soft laugh when he saw Hyunjin taking a seat on Minho's bed.

"I was talking with her."

"You can talk with her later, Hyunjin-ah. She's already running late." Chan made a movement with his head towards the door, and the younger one rolled his eyes.

He's so moody today.

"I'll take care of him. Take the other two, please." I laughed, and Hyunjin's face softened.

Chan nodded and took Changbin and Felix with him to have breakfast in the kitchen.

"You were saying?" I smiled at a not-so-grumpy Hyunjin.

"Thank you so much, Felix, for the bouquet." he said with a funny voice, imitating me.

"You know that sentence was directed at you, silly."

"You still said Felix."

"Hey, he's still covering for us when he does not have to. You should appreciate it." I scolded the tall one.

"You didn't thank me." he pouted.

"Thank you so much, Hyunjin-ah, for the most precious bouquet anyone has ever gifted to me." I walked towards him with a sweet smile on my lips.

"That sounds like the most beautiful melody to my ears." he said, his hands back to my waist, pulling me in again.

"So you don't like Kistch at all?" I giggled

"Oh, c'mon" he said, rolling his eyes. "You can be a little Lee Know when you want to." The boy added some kind of annoyed tone to his voice.

"Yeah, I spend like... most of my day with him."

His face dropped again.

"Stop being a jealous fuck!" I pushed him playfully.

"I will when you finally admit that you're in love with him and not me."

"Oh my God, why are you so dramatic?" I really laughed out loud.

"You did not give me a good morning kiss." flashed his eyes to my lips and back to my eyes.

"I don't ever do that."

"You should start, like, right now."

"You are taking my precious time."

A knock on the door was heard.

"Moon-ssi, you really need to get going." Felix's voice again

"See, he's still covering for us. If it was Seungmin that was sent to call me, he'd just open the door and catch you asking for kisses."

"Just admit that you love everybody else but me at this point, God." he exaggerated on purpose, being even more dramatic than before.

"I'm going, Lix." I said this towards the door and placed a sweet, soft kiss on the boy's lips, winning a big, bright smile from him.

"Give me a proper kiss before I leave." He pulled me back.

As I leaned close to him, my phone started ringing.

"tall, blonde, Australian."

"I know for a fact that's not Yongbok... or Chan Hyung." Hyunjin said while his lips were still in position to receive a kiss. I took my phone and answered.

"Hey, Luke." I said while looking straight into my member's eyes as his face dropped again, making me laugh.

"HAPPY BIRTHDAY!" Three voices screamed at the phone.

"Thank youuuu~" I laughed, still wrapped around Jinnie.

"You're very welcome" Michael answered joyfully.

"It's not my birthday there yet, though."

"It is." Ashton said, adding a bit of mystery to the conversation.

"It's like two in the afternoon over there... It's still the 19th."

"Nah, it's like around seven in the morning" Luke said, like it was obvious.

"What are you talking about?" Hyunjin is plating kisses on my face and neck while

"Yeah, well. We kind of just arrived in Seoul." Ash talked again.

"YOU WHAT?" I screamed right in front of the boy's face, causing him to roll his eyes.

"Happy birthday, Luna" a shy Luke spoke. "We gotta do some airport shit; I'll talk to you later. See you at your debut! Break a leg."

"What?! But..." I didn't get to finish my sentence because he hung up the phone.

"What did you yell for?" His eyes were mid-way closed.

"Luke, Mike, and Ashton just landed here." I smiled at him.

"They really do like you, huh?" He smiled back.

"They're my friends, I guess." I looked at the clock. "Honey, I need to get ready now. I seriously need to." I planted a little longer kiss on Hyunjin's lips, and he wouldn't pull away. "Please, baby" I whispered right on top of his lips.

"Fine. But we're going out tonight." He kissed my forehead. "love you" he whispered before closing the door.

I started taking my shirt off, and he stuck his head through the door.

"What now, Hyunjin-ah?" I laughed

"Two things... First, you look fucking hot in that bra. And second, you didn't say it back" he pouted.

"So clingy" I said, rolling my eyes, and he accentuated his pout. "Love you too, pabo"

"Enough for me. Get on your knees," he joked. "I mean, get ready."

"I'm trying." I smiled, took everything, and went to the bathroom.

Part two

[anarchic-miscellany]

Reading "One Piece" for the First Time, Part 11: So our gang are hanging out in "every town from an evil Western" ever, and I should be annoyed that the author has put Meme in Progress and Giga Chad to sleep, but... Actually I am a bit annoyed, they're great.

To the surprise of only The Idiot, this town of obviously suspiciously evil people led by a man with a violently dreadful haircut are kind of evil. But this is all a simple excuse to have The Himbo do his thing, and stretch his legs a little. A fair bit of it is "edgy shonen protagonist" stuff, but there's a zany, wacky little sequence involving a ladder straight out of a Buster Keaton movie, so that's always a plus from me, and the art has much improved this time: the author has gotten much better at drawing lunacy. I look forward to when he gives screentime to anyone who isn't the Himbo and the Idiot.

Then he has to go and fucking ruin it by bringing back The Idiot, to do whatever the fuck this bimbling barrel of buffoonery does. The joke could have been great, have him waking up to find that the town of murderous evil-doers are dead, and The Himbo just smoking a cigarette, looking to his freshly fucked blade and going "Was it good for you too?" but alas they hate my brilliant ideas, so we have this.

The gruesome twosome have another Shonen-y fight with some more weirdos, and an utterly bizarre bit where the Idiot is briefly annoyed by The Himbo apparently murdering people: my guy, those blades don't have fucking safety wheels on. Would you be annoyed at The Giga Chad for cooking carrots or Pat Sharp for being a DJ, would you? Stupid question, this character's a fucking moron.

The Cartographer with a brain cell shakes them out of it, as this is all a way to introduce what I assume are our actual villains "The Baroque Works", which seems superfluous since every motherfucker they've tusseled with has had hair like a Dutch Cathedral and outfits like a T-shirt cannon loaded with the wardrobe from "The Fifth Element". Still, the leader is named "Crocodile", and oh god I hope they fight a crocodile. OH I HOPE THE GIGA CHAD EATS A CROCODILE. He'd better eat a crocodile, Ohda, I swear to all that is holy!

Not as much to annoy me in this chapter (no fucking Dracule Mihawk, thank fucking Christ) aside from the giant duck being ready to kill The Idiot but suddenly decided to ride in the different direction because it being infected by his stupidity is the only reason the author could come up with to write his moron out of a corner.

But it didn't annoy me that much. I just want more of Giga Chad, Meme in Progress and the Cartographer with a Brain Cell. It's like dinner with an 8 year old: "No, you can't have more morons until you'd spent time with the current crop of idiots! Now finish your Giga Chad and Meme in Progress!"

The plot about a princess revolution is going to get dropped faster than that cowboy manga I read from this guy's nonce teacher ("Gun Blaze West" sucks so hard guys), so at least they're making progress in the plot...

They're now chatting to a Rodeo Stripper, and really guys? A bit of a step down from otters and duck-riding princesses and men with curly hair cannons in this town alone.

I'm down for Rodeo Strippers though, cowboys and Westerns are my jam.