#am i pretty? by sunday cruise

[xxnashiraxx]

WIP Whenever!

Thank you for tagging me @khywren !!! 🖤🩷🖤🩷

I have some more crumbs for Chapter 8 of With Stars to Fill My Dream, coming out Sunday!

This is the more fun, less anger fueled section of the chapter. Heavy emphasis on the word fun! (Fun fact, long ago I posted a snippet of this exact passage, but much has changed since then!)

Rather than being able to hear and see his thoughts manifest, his vampiric connection threads their emotions together like a silken tapestry of color. A pretty blend of red, orange, and green blooms like fireworks against a dark sky, dazzling behind her eyelids. She isn’t sure if it’s him, or her, or the both of them, but god it’s beautiful. It courses through her until the tingling starts, cruising up and down her nervous system to burn her core and singe her fingertips. She’s never felt a desire this intense, not even on her own. It’s all-consuming, raging like a fire where before she’d been submerged in ice.

As her tears start to dry on her cheeks, she slips a hand from covering her mouth to instead tentatively thread through his curls. His hair is soft, cool like lace as it tickles her knuckles. He doesn’t seem to mind, and she gently scrapes her nails over his scalp, earning a thrust of his hips. She gasps and her vision sparks, his hands moving to her waist to clench tightly as she bites back a crude moan. The usual voice of reason in her head is being uncharacteristically silent, and she can’t help but yield to instinct in its place.

The fingers of her other hand move up to his neck, softly pressing her palm over his Adam's apple, and she’s lulled into a trance by the rhythmic bobbing of every swallow. She can’t see his face, but she can feel a smile in the shape of his lips on her skin and it burns her cheeks, making her shiver and sigh into the night air

My people! I am tagging you again, and I'm sorry if it's twice. Please ignore if so!

@preciouslittlebhaalbae @ladyduellist @verbenaa @inkymoonbunny @justabiteofspite @sashitf

[delopsia]

I miss the boys and having the case of Sunday scaries. How would Bob and Rhett take your mind off things?

Here I am...several days later...multiple Sundays later...oops 🧍‍♂️

Bobby's the kind of guy who's initially gonna lay out the offer to talk about what's got you so nervous; he'd feel guilty if he didn't give you the chance to talk about it with him. He can listen and let you talk until your voice is shot or he can try to offer potential solutions from an outside perspective. It all depends on what you want at the moment.

But if you don't want to talk about it, then he's got a list of go-to's that typically cheer you up. Wanna go out and get some snacks together? Watch a movie? Both? What if he does that thing where he gently rubs the tension out of your hands? Running his thumbs in soft circles, unwinding the knots, and distracting you from everything else going on in the world.

Or, if that all fails, he can and will do something to make you laugh. Sometimes, that's showing you a funny video on your phone. Others, it means making a fool of himself. The man is not above intentionally tripping himself or falling off the bed if it'll get you to start giggling.

Rhett...isn't exactly that great at handling things like this. He's just as lost as you are. He's always released his strongest emotions by climbing on the back of a thousand-pound animal. But he's not? Taking you to the rodeo and sticking you on a bull?

So he goes to his second best remedy, going out for a drive in his truck. No destination in mind, just cruising and playing your favorite songs.

If that's not an option, then he's got one other idea up his sleeve. When Amy was little and learning to sleep alone in her bedroom, Rebecca bought her a weighted blanket, saying something about the pressure creating some sort of calming effect. Rhett doesn't have any of those fancy things, but he's heavy enough to be comparable, right?

So he just lays on you. Typically without warning; one minute, you're staring at the ceiling, and the next, you've got a cowboy blanket snuggled on top of you. He'll hum, trace idle shapes into your skin, press kisses into your chest, anything he can do to keep you focused on him and not whats in your head.

Together, they make for an interesting duo because their methods don't really change. Bobby's still gonna give you the offer to talk about it, but as he's doing this, Rhett is actively clambering on top of you. Which does sometimes end in them both laying on you, one on either side of your body.

Rhett's still got his methods of distraction, and Bob will typically mirror them, humming along or tracing his own shapes into your belly. But if they're having a hard time keeping you out of your head, then they'll intentionally bicker. Sometimes, this even escalates to playful wrestling. Anything to keep you distracted.

Their second best method is resorting to a combination of pointless driving and going out for snacks. Cruising in the bench seat of Rhett's truck, looking at the scenery as he drives to various places for everyone's favorite treats. Bob wouldn't typically want to drive twenty minutes to another store because this one doesn't have his favorite ice cream flavor, but doing so means spending more time in the truck. And who knows what kind of distracting things y'all will find on your trip?

They're not the best at it, but they're pretty good at finding a distraction for you 🌷

[goitale]

INTRODUCTION POST!!!

hello! i'm goi! they/them pronouns please!

NOTE: i reblog alot! i have featured tags (ex. #gois yaps) for my own blogs!! please use them if theres a flood of jesstra in ur face LOL

i am a nonbinary lesbian, who is taken by a v pretty person! ((IM A MINOR))

yes i use a typing quirk! þ=th

NOTE: if you use or support generative ai (ai images, art, text, summaries, roleplays, chats, calls, voices, ANYTHING) you should block me. AND IF YOU USE AI TO TAKE MY ART ??? im actually going to blow someone up and itll be you. THATS PLAGIARISM. THATS A CRIME ISNT IT. what the FUCK

my favorite color is orange :3 favorite combo is purple and orange. also i love halloween, which might be a factor

im currently very interested in: Oriko Magica, Minecraft: Story Mode, Some roblox games, Splatoon, my gf's ocs!!

i have comfort ships!!! which are currently: Orikiri, Jesstra, Pearlina, Array

PLZ INTERACT: mutual interests, oriko magica lovers, jesstra shippers, jesskas shippers, pearlina shippers, awesome artists, LGBTQIA+!!

PLZ DNI: basic dni critera, homophobic, transphobic, furry haters, zooph supporters, bad people supporters (ex. vivziepop,..), nsfw accounts (btw no 18+ jokes here.), under 13, etc. + aiden x anyone, romeo x anyone, medhammer, and other toxic/problematic shippers please

>>'toxic' shipping is when you ship people just for the toxic part/angst part and not for them to actually be happy , toxic relationships r not fun!./info

>>'problematic' shipping is when its immoral. yes, vinespace and medhammer is immoral/lh u can ship whoever , idc just keep it legal and safe, but i dont forward immoral stuff. sorry medhammer fanbase/gen! /info

fun facts:

im a chronic reblogger, please look at my featured tags for my own content!

>>>>>my important tags are #gois favs (my favorite posts!), #goi being goi (funny or interesting posts that show who i am!) and the au tags-- the tags are to help find what content i post ofc, cus or else youd never find my own content. and sadly not everything is completely organized but we live!

my favorites r in #gois favs , where its stuff i wanna look at again! if u get a reblog w þat tag, you won/gen

i rarely change my profile!

my music taste stinks, my bad chat

i play roblox alot!

i have a ps3, 3ds, wii, minicassette tape recorder/player, and more old stuff!!

i do wax melting when i send mail, letters, etc.!

i love cats!!

i write ao3 stuff! mostly of dead source content fandoms or ocs!

now for a wall of buttons:

music i listened to on loop recently!! (no i dont have spotify):

+508 songs... i love game music!

we can b mutuals if you know me on discord!!! :3 just do an ask to lmk or else i wont follow back my baddd

pronouns page:

idrk what else to say my badddd

feel free to ask questions or @ me in cool posts!

HIDDEN FUN FACT!!!! THIS BLOG IS COLOR CODED! pink = misc but cool thing

u can guess what þe 'key' is :3

[rivaindaisies]

some dragon age music headcanons bc it’s fucking late and i feel extra neurodivergent today

origins

morrigan is such a fucking edge lord in this game, she absolutely gatekeeps what she listens to but it’s pretty basic alternative stuff. arctic monkeys but only am and fsvorite worst nightmare, mindless self indulgence, a lot of joy division (she absolutely is the type of person to go up to someone in an unknown pleasures shirt and ask them to name three songs), some nirvana, pixies, etc. her favorite songs are arabella by arctic monkeys, back to the old house by the smiths, and probably mascara by deftones. she doesn’t listen to metal a lot but has a few deftones and lamb of god songs on her playlists.

leliana is trying to recreate her life in this game. she’s running from a lot of things, but also beginning to reflect. since she hasn’t been through as much as she has in inquisition, her music taste is much more relaxed here. i think she’d love dreamy shit, like the cocteau twins and the sundays especially. she listens to some lana del rey as well, mostly just nfr/lust for life. there’s a band called another sunny day i feel like she’d fuck with a lot too. her favorite songs are goodbye by the sundays and white mustang by lana del rey.

alistair listens to top 40 and nothing else

origins is my least favorite so i can’t think of much else for companions, i have the lowest time played as well so 🤷‍♂️

da2

varric has the most dad music taste you could imagine. all classic rock, nothing else. i can very clearly imagine him cruising around blasting ac/dc and kiss.

fenris doesn’t listen to music, he just sort of goes along with what the others are playing. he likes slower songs, they help calm him down. if romanced, he ends up listening to the songs hawke likes and developing the same music taste as them and i think it would be a connection for them

isabela has some rare genuine self awareness in the music she listens to. she listens to lana del rey and marina and the diamonds, and that’s about it. her favorite albums from lana are born to die, paradise, and ultraviolence. her favorite marina albums are electra heart and froot. her favorite songs are i’m a ruin/rootless by marina, ride by ldr, and the other woman by ldr as well. hope is a dangerous thing for a woman like me to have is the only later lana song she like LOVES. basically 2014 tumblr taste but oh well

merrill listens to mainly instrumental music, either classical guitar or orchestral music. it helps her focus and calms her down quite a bit. she also really enjoys folk music. some of her favorite albums are shaken by a low sound by crooked still, someday we will foresee obstacles by syd matters, and dear wormwood by the oh hellos.

anders is also an angst fest. he listens to a lot of the smiths, mother mother (and hes very particular about being a “real fan” and knowing them before they blew up) and some nu metal as well. his favorite songs are this charming man by the smiths, 7 words by deftones, and you should all be murdered by another sunny day. calm me down by mother mother as well.

aveline listens to ed sheeran and coldplay exclusively. i don’t know why i feel this way but i do and im gonna leave it at that

inquisition

leliana has been through so much over the last ten years, and the music she listens to reflects that. she doesn’t listen to music much anymore, but has a couple songs that she listens to. her taste is a lot heavier now- deftones, lamb of god, and some death metal as well. no specific bands, just whatever is the loudest and heaviest. i hc that morrigan showed her a few smiths songs during origins, and the one that stuck with her most is that joke isn’t funny anymore. she listens to it a lot, and relates to it a lot. it’s her favorite song. a few honorable mentions to that are sextape by deftones, and blood of the scribe by lamb of god. sometimes, she listens to the songs she loved back in dao times and gets lost in the memories of that time. her favorite song for that is the greatest by lana del rey.

josephine is mainly a classical/opera listener. i cannot picture her listening to anything else. maybe sometimes she gets angry, or exhausted/fed up with her job, and listens to the things she considers to be “heavy” but it’s something like acdc which she considers to be basically death metal because it has an audible electric guitar.

the chargers just blast dad music 24/7, along with varric/sera/blackwell.

cassandra absolutely listens to love songs all the time. she falls asleep listening to a playlist filled with songs like video games/love song/without you/lucky ones by lana. i feel like she was absolutely a tumblr girl and never grew out of that music taste despite presenting as an absolute hardass.

dorian adores artists like kylie minogue, lady gaga, etc. his favorite songs are shampain by marina, aura by lady gaga, and 911 also by gaga lmao. he also for SURE owns a justice for artpop shirt.

i have a lot more but don’t want to type any more out if this gets any attention i’ll add more tho- if you’ve somehow read this far into my adhd rambles thank you 🙏🙏 and comment ur thoughts/ideas of what characters would listen to

[solangelostars]

SOLANGELOSTARS INTRO

--some memories never leave your bones.

BASIC INFO

hello !!! this is my official intro to my tumblr page. For some background, I left tumblr about 2 years ago, but now I am back and ready to give editing one more chance.

-> I'm mori !! I use mostly he/it prns, and some neos. I'm trans ftm, cupioromantic, and gay. I have a horrible obsession with iced tea and like to rant abt things. I'm an ISTP 6w5, and my alignment is chaotic neutral.

INTERESTS

I am a multifandom blog, so I will post anything I want to here !! Here's a list of some of my fave things !!

-> tv: the umbrella academy, ginny and georgia, alice in borderland, heartstopper, total drama island, avatar: the last air bender, the legend of korra, daybreak

-> movies: barbie, the ballad of songbirds and snakes, the perks of being a wallflower, fantastic mr. fox, beautiful boy

-> anime/manga: bungo stray dogs, hirano and kagiura, sasaki and miyano, the case study of vanitas, toilet bound hanako kun, given, sk8 the infinity

-> music: mitski, ricky montgomery, will wood and the tapeworms, lemon demon, conan gray, remember sports, sunday cruise

-> games/others: ensemble stars, honkai impact 3rd, honkai: star rail, genshin impact, helios rising heroes, cookie run kingdom, project sekai, obey me, nijisanjien (🧤🥽)

right now, I'm looking for moots!! I'm open to pretty much anyone, and I came back to Tumblr to make some new friends, as well as revisit old ones. Tumblr has changed a lot since I last created, so I appreciate people showing me around. I hope we can get along well !!

[aestheticvoyage2023]

Day 264: Thursday September 21, 2023 - "Afternoons with Dad"

I try hard to make the afternoons with Dad active and memorable and not just running out the clock until bath time, and today I got a shock that really made me consider why that was so important.

With these new week day chops, I tell myself its not that its going to be easier than those weekend days, just different cadence. Instead of a full Saturday and Sunday Ive got to fill up right, I am going to be responsible for mornings and afternoons before and after a trip to the Montessori School. A new routine to build - a new plan to make.

Today he was all smiles after school pickup. He enjoyed wearing his new cars shirt and his new shoes to cruise in. Today, his fourth at school with no diaper, he had a successful potty and was sure to tell me that he felt he deserved a big truck for that accomplishment. I didnt have a big truck, but I did have a new puzzle of all the planets. We sat in the great room and worked on it together, learning each planet as places he could go visit in his rocket ship. He then wanted to bring it in his rocket ship seat as if it was a roadmap. Well played. I pointed out Earth - 'we live here' - our neighborhood. Soon, he was telling me pee was coming, and I wondered if it was to try to see what else might be in the prize closet. Unfortunately though, there are no more potty prizes to collect. He's aced it. He continues to work on getting his pants down on his own, but other than he's all about "William do it" - when he resolved to there being no more potty prize, he changed tact - "orange popsicle. big" - ok, that I can do. He's earned it. I love how he is at just the right height now where when he stands next to me, his head and long hair are right at my hand where i can rub his head and pull it into my leg as he hugs me and I tell him he's doing a really good job.

As the afternoon temps dropped, we ventured out to the driveway to play with the cars on the pavement, and shoot off rockets as high as we could. Over and over and over again, from red, yellow, blue - he'd run in a circle counting down from five and then plant perfectly on the launch button, pushing the rocket ship up towards the moon (or at least 10-12 feet). I let him do this for as long as it was fun for him - if he wanted to do this until bath time, I would have been all for it. Fun for both of us. For dinner we hit the store to get weekend provisions, and a quick trip to Bdubs, before home to watch football, play with trucks. William said he wanted hot dog and french fries, and so I pulled that together for him, using french fries with smiley faces that he really liked. As bath time neared, he was bored with football and came up to me perfectly calm and said "watch firebuds please." Turns out maybe potty training isn't the only muscle we've been building. I was happy to oblige. He crawled up on me and rewarded my compliance with cuddles. It was the best part of my day. I turned on a couple episodes of Firebuds to wind down the night then we did a clingy bath time and an easy bed time in which I read a Halloween wheels on the bus, then Little Blue Truck's Halloween, and finishing with a soothing quiet reading of Goodnight Moon. 10 minutes later he'd be asleep and Id be sneaking out. Success.

Its not a full weekend day like I am used to, but still so important. Important connection time that he'll remember what it looked like, especially as the blocks build day in and day out on these coming months. And he reminded me today why it was important.

When we were leaving to go to the store, he was saying something I couldnt understand, a pretty common deciphering puzzle game these past couple weeks as his confidence in his language blooms faster than his ability to pull the right phrase together. Whatever it was, it sounded like Mookie Betts. Over and over again. So I said "what do you know about Mookie Betts. Did you know he plays for the Dodgers?" William looked at me confused - obviously Mookie Betts was not the intended topic of conversation. "Do you remember going to see the Dodgers?" I asked, and William confidently responded with a "yes" - the the normal "i-dont-know-what-you're-talking-about-Yes" that we very often hear. I said Oh! do you remember who we saw the Dodgers with? and he caught me way off guard when he said "Chad!" and then doubled down with the fact that he "got a bobble guy to bring home" which were all true facts. Out of the Dodger blue from 3 months ago. No prompts, or help or any recent reminders. When I told Audrie that night on facetime, her jaw dropped. "Its all in there" she said- but to hear him recall that with such good memory for something that we didn't make a real big deal out of at the time, really brought home that everything we're doing right now counts. He's remembering. He's feeling. He's experiencing, and he's wiring. All those times I push through the exhaustion or the stress or the anxiety to show up and do good, its all going in there. These random Thursday afternoons, are just as important as any time. "hey remember that time we fired rockets off in the driveway?" or rode the train at the zoo, or let you eat your own pizza slice at mod pizza? I wonder what all is in there that he can recall and what else will surprise me. I assumed that this day would be out in the future some time when he would start remembering and pulling the dots together, but I guess that day is now and I am so glad I don't have to worry about what I might be doing to mess it up.... i am so happy to hear that he is remembering these days and these fun experiences we do. Its good motivation to keep up this important good work of being a solid, tired dad.

Song: Ugly Kid Joe - Cats In The Cradle

Quote: “There is no scent of nostalgia like a fragrance drawn from the garden of childhood memories.” ― Aloo Denish

[doki-doki-lesbians-club]

OK I just discovered the indie band Sunday Cruise and they have such a vibe, I can't stop listening to their album Am I Pretty? it's just so good~♥

[sweetswesf]

Hey hey, y’all.

I’m mad Tumblr STILL hasn’t responded to any of my support tickets to get my messaging back. As an engineer, I am criticizing the app in a different way than most lol. There’s a lot of cool things with the UI, but the way you can’t separate primary & secondary blogs, some of the playback, the slow or no responses on support tickets is kinda getting to me. I didn’t think it’d frustrate me this much, but it does…Maybe it was protection…

I made a lot of progress last week. I feel like I am making strides and getting stronger with concepts. I had 2 onsites and a practice technical and I felt I did pretty good in all of them. Rejected from one in less than 24 hours, but that 1 involved a lot of semi negative back & forth with the recruiters for over a month, so I felt the decision was made before I even did the interview.

I was exhausted, but felt like I was detaching from the pain of things and just telling myself get through it. Even in my workouts. My body was tired but it felt like it was moving without my mind. I know it’s only God…I spent less time on social media, I spent less time procrastinating, and I can get through most 12 hour days without needing a nap. I am completely wiped out on my break days (Sundays) and take 4 hour naps then lol but I remember a time during my early months of being laid off where I couldn’t get through the day without a 3 hour nap.

I am about done with the sections of the API YouTube course I want to go over. It is a really good course and it’s at a good level of detail I need. I was familiar with the material, but this was good to solidify understanding of certain concepts. I think I have like one more day left that I’d like to spend on it for prep for my interviews. A lot of things make a lot more sense. I wanted to get past it so that I can focus more on system design and algos, but it was necessary to go over. I’m trying to balance learning quite a bit of topics: system design, APIs, DS&A, OOP, behavioral questions.

For you that have been commenting on my posts encouraging me, especially @mythgrippa-blog & @tenaciousdeveloper, I want to send a particular word of appreciation. Whenever I get a bit discouraged, I remember your comments, so thank you so much.

I even caught a butterfly by its wings! I’ve always wanted to do that, but I don’t think I’ll ever do that again. I won’t forget how surprisingly strong it was wriggling to get free. I quickly released it when I realized I could be hurting it’s wings! I’m sure I did though and the thought makes me sick. I never meant to hurt it. These are sentient beings. There was no need for me to do that. I didn’t realize I would hurt it before I did it. I was on break from an on-site, feeling good, listening to this song, and intrusive thoughts took over.

It flew away fine, but still…I’m sure I damaged the wings just by touching it. I felt a similar guilt when I thought my car would clear and not hit this cat that was laying in the middle of the street. It didn’t and I killed a little collar-less white kitten 😔. This was almost a decade ago. I don’t even own a car anymore but I still think about it & feel guilty.

I took a Cruise autonomous car ride. That was my 3rd time in an autonomous car ride, but 1st one by Cruise. After it, I was inspired. This is the type of things that drew me to tech in the 1st place…

School loans start accruing interest again at the end of this month, and I would like to pay those off. I haven’t looked into deferring my payments because I’m hoping I can pay them off before needing that option. It is humbling to go from having a lot of autonomy with spending to relying on government assistance. Life comes at you fast…I can’t judge anyone. I do, but I shouldn’t and I try not to. I am reminded everyday, with every new experience or challenge, that you truly don’t know what people are facing or what the heck you would do if in a similar scenario. Ideas & history are different from reality.

Pastor at church today said, “You think you have strong faith until something happens that tests it,” and I related hard. I reflect on everything. Sometimes I just sit and stare like, “I’m tired and I’m ready for a different reality.”

My mom comes at the start of September too, and I would like to fully enjoy that with her with my dream job. I will enjoy it regardless though.

I order from DoorDash less, to save money, and also, because there’s not that many options that are healthy, and regardless if the meal is healthy or not, I’ve had it so many times that I’d rather just try to make a replica of my own if I have time. Some things I just can’t replicate, but I do like that I’m empowering myself to have some control over that. I’m often negotiating between saving money and saving time when it comes to this food stuff.

Also, food at this point is one of the only break aways from work that I’m allowing myself to enjoy right now. A LOT of my community has left the city or don’t reach out despite my efforts of trying to maintain the relationship. I don’t want to forge new ones right now, because the emotional and financial investment is… a lot right now. Anytime you want free time outside these days, you end up spending like $50 at minimum! I also feel like I need to find someone to help on Sundays. Sundays are for rest though, and so far, I’ve taken up the whole day washing my hair, going to church, grocery shopping, cooking, eating, napping for 3 or 4 hours, reflecting, and YouTube video watching. I don’t study, I don’t do any chores, and I don’t even like cooking those days. I appreciate my Sundays for what they are for: rest.

A few people close to me asked me again this week if I wanted to keep doing this and I was audibly annoyed. They don’t think I’ve made success in the way I should, but they don’t know much about the industry or how things typically go on this side. They also don’t know my plan. They don’t have to, but it does because it kind of feels they don’t believe in my abilities. I don’t want to be struggling forever, but I don’t think I should give up. I want to do this. I mean, I even get the question a lot in interviews. Like, I transitioned about 3 years ago. Why are you still asking me why I transitioned? You’re wasting time when you could be asking me about my qualifications for this role. I’m sure non-career-transitioners (people with traditional backgrounds) don’t get asked why they chose that field. Does it matter WHY I’ve chosen it if I’ve been gainfully employed in it for years and am applying to keep doing it? It shouldn’t. This question is totally valid outside of interviews. I appreciate answering it then. It just feels invasive when asked in interviews. I could see if I was fresh out of my old career, but I’ve been working as a full time software engineer for more than 3. It almost feels like, “well duh!” at this point when it comes to choosing tech. Look around you. Why not?! EVERY industry damn there has been elevated and can’t survive without tech. It’s really hard to cover your basic needs and a lot people on a 6-figure salary are living paycheck to paycheck given how outrageous rent is. At least tech gives you a fighting chance. Look at me! A tech worker still with debt who’s now had to rely on government assistance…It feels similar to interviewers asking why I majored in something. It doesn’t matter at all when you should be looking at the work I’ve done for money.

It was recommended, and I agreed, that I should stop interviewing with startups and start interviewing with companies I would like to work at, so I’m doing that soon. I feel a bit impatient and when I do, I try to refocus and remind myself that I shouldn’t give up and potentially blow the progress made thus far (another word of encouragement from y’all reading, so thank you!). I just need to keep going, stop feeling rushed, be fearless, be strategic, have confidence, and know that God will give me something great in due time that’s fit for me that exceeds my expectations.

I’m grateful for vision, dexterity, my mental health, my education, having hot water, still being able to afford a gym membership and to never go hungry. To spend on organic groceries. I also still have quite a bit of savings. I didn’t realize but my high yield savings account has been kicking me back about the amount of a week’s worth of meals & groceries every month. Praise God. I also am still able to tithe and be generous to people who need help during this time.

The things that I wanted months and even weeks ago, like purses, shoes, etc. all seem so frivolous now. Thousands on these things? I’ve never spent that much on purses & shoes. I’ve never been that girl, but I HAVE bought a lot of excess before, or bought things, albeit cheap, that I thought I would use one day. I even imagined that once I get a job, I would treat myself on one of those $1k+ purses, just because I’m a 30 and never have bought anything designer. Now, I don’t even care about taking a vacation. I just want to wake up employed. I WILL take a vacation, but I don’t mind just visiting something local. I miss NYC like crazy! I’ve always wanted to visit Atlanta (my 1st visit was at night and was too short, I had to drive back to Nashville in the morning). Those purses and shoes are still NICE but, I don’t HAVE to have them like I once felt…Imma still treat myself, but the treats won’t be as extravagant/often/out of my honest price range.

Fashion blogs seem so DUMB to me now. The THOUSANDS people will pay and still be in debt or not own any assets seems CRAZY now. But it took this to open my eyes. I’ve been unemployed before when I was fresh out of bootcamp, and I went into super frugal mode, and promised myself to maintain those habits. I did a lot, but still made dumb decisions after I got employed again. Freeing myself from want this time around, I hope it sticks.

There were days this week where I woke up wanting to contact a particular dude from my past. Just thirsty and lonely and craving a hug. I kept saying, “I just want a hug.” It’s really just me. Day in & day out. Friends & family only call. Everyone close to me I have to talk to virtually through a screen/over the phone. It gets to me…someone will love me hard and give me the affection I crave one day. I need to rely on God’s love though and remember not to put too much dependence on people, but it’s okay to want a partner. God honors marriage and says a spouse is to supply the other’s needs for affection. Not one way: this is for both partners.

I’m grateful for everything this time has taught me and I don’t know if I would have learned it without this. I shun fear of not getting what I want. I refuse to believe that my efforts will go unrewarded. I chase away the devil that made me believe I was less than. In the meeting with my mentor last week, he said, “I’m going to be candid: the team did NOT like that you were let go. We all felt that you had made so much progress and we actually had a rant session about it.” That almost made me cry, because I felt like the weakest link on the team at that time, but to know that people respected my work and felt like great things were coming for me, confirmed my suspicions too that I KNEW things were looking up. I had finally felt comfortable, and then it felt like my progress was stopped. But I know, and I knew even when I got laid off, even without my next position, it wasn’t a mistake. God tends to shift things when you’re feeling comfortable. He’s trying to elevate me. I will be in a higher position my next role, potentially making more than double what I was. More than what I could have gotten if I stayed. I don’t fear getting let go as much anymore because I know how to do these algos, or, I know where I can go to refresh my understandings of them. I lived in fear before this and couldn’t truly enjoy anything because I knew there was a huge hole in my understanding of things in the interview & my career that I felt I didn’t have the time to learn. Nothing is by mistake and I’m grateful to Him. Amen!

I hope y’all are well too. Be blessed <3

[traipseartist]

November 21 - AUS International Airport

CW: Preachy as hell

All airports are the same in that not a single one of them is the same. There are some visual staples to the quintessential American airport:

Security that is simultaneously incredibly exposed and claustrophobic

Banquettes of chairs fused together and facing one direction, theater seating style (maybe even peeling, saggy, or with defunct outlets and USB ports if you are lucky)

HIGH ceilings so that birds get confused and meet (un?)timely deaths... Or just move into the structure at large

Busy-patterned concrete or laminate walkways amongst bolts of busy-patterned terminal carpet

Deeply less good versions of local restaurant chains that really got too big for their britches or were always secretly backed by a multi-million dollar conglomerate, anyway

Something ALWAYS beeping

PA systems crackling or too quiet, even in airports built or renovated long after 1961

Bathrooms all with weird quirks that in theory enable them to be cleaned less but likely result in them being cleaned more (looking at you, toilet-seat-sleeve-ORD)

But though I've been through... so... so many American airports (and I am indeed from the city that's boasted the busiest one for nigh as long as I've been alive) I still find something still novel and torturous every time I'm back. Roughly once a month, I gather my things and ride 20-40 minutes out of town and hurry up, and wait, and hurry up, and wait.

In many ways, the airport's never-ending, time-unteathered surge of movement makes it feel like a dream. Hordes of humans shuffling in one direction or the other like manic starlings at 6am. 2pm. 11pm. Drinking beer and eating food always like it is brunch on a lazy Sunday somewhere on a cruise ship in the Caribbean. Relentlessly. The same and different people. People who have been to this airport twice a week for the past ten years. People who have never stepped foot in this airport in their lives. People who never intended to be here in the first place. Passing through in body. Passing over in mind.

Maybe it's the nature of how lonely most people are in their anxiety, in their traversal through this world. Even when they travel in pairs or in family units, their coping mechanisms appear to proliferate in some strange isolation--as if the majority of us haven't been co-existing in close proximity with other human beings for the majority of our lives. Like seeing tourists traverse a busy city--somehow an outsider that is supposed to, as quickly as time will allow, learn the dance. No time to posture your face and your body to hide your discomfort or your insecurity. A stranger in a strange land.

As someone who, at this point, has probably traveled alone more than she has traveled with others--there is no easier way to observe the small percentage of the population that can afford to travel with any level of a casual disposition. We are currently pretty awful at moving back and forth between our space and the world that surrounds us in these contexts, and seem to have a near-extreme level of terror with being unoccupied for even a few minutes at any given time.

Taking even a casual pan of the environment reveals maybe about 100+ humans in view upon the exit from the security checkpoint. Of those that are not actively sleeping or walking (and even some of those, too, actually), only one of them appears to not be staring at a screen. ONE. And she is eating a sandwich and talking to a peer (who is on a screen). I don't even count! Talking to you, dear reader, like I am relaying some profound piece of information that you already know--we are never not absolutely always communing with the great online, and we turn to it when we are most desperate (and honestly, least desperate) to be soothed, to not feel the knife's edge of time pass over our skin.

As I venture to be further from this modern life and modern occupation with the never ending spillage of 15 second reels and texting and scrolling, I struggle to have many people to look to in this space. It is no wonder that I am having to write much of this playbook on my own time and without modern assistance. Looking to those who navigated the world before pocket screens and bag screens is less useful--when these escapes were non-existent, not practical, or not effective, the immunity was not necessary. I don't think the level of restraint needed to resist the siren's song of the PDA was so difficult to summon.

I have succeeded in spending entire weekends in the woods without my digital coping devices... but in a place without constant, novel, external stimulation or unceasing responsibility I am really lucky to go more than two waking hours at a time without a computer screen or a phone screen. If I am not in a very social context that demands my hands be free (which is really, like, let's be honest, eating a meal and dancing and... not much else).

Perhaps this is why the airport is so crazy-making in this way. Are we actually happy to be stuck in this state? Double purgatory? Living in this weird extra dimension and never really being fully present anywhere in time or space unless the flow of our not-here friends and our parasocial fixations are accounted for? There's not a lot of incentive to try and break from this flow. If you are the only one looking around a room and no one meets your eye, is there much of a point in trying to engage at all? Is there a healthy boundary? Or just a more acceptable one?

I'm not here to shun the internet. I just wish it was still stapled to a table in a library or in the corner of my family's computer room like it used to be. And to pretend that people weren't doing other things to occupy themselves in places like waiting rooms, trains, and the airport before the cellphone is foolhardy, assuredly. But... to be dreamy for T9 and crummy brick phones that were good only for calling and short bursts of information from your nearest contacts doesn't feel so reactive or luddicious to me. Have we been enriched, truly, by social media and the ability to play Wordle while we poop? What if you miss the brilliance of someone attempting to put their Pomeranian through the x-ray machine because you were too busy trying to figure out who is in the background of your high school girlfriend's latest Instagram photo from her wedding?

Throw away your Apple watches and your Fitbits, friends. There's nothing keeping us here on earth other than our ability to feel it under our feet.

[the-firebird69]

The crabs left their 10% that left 10% more as slowly moving into the position they were in they will be there momentarily this is a good sign and it is a nice thing they're doing yes and it almost there father doing that the next Cruise moving where they were and the ones that are next saw where they went and what direction and a smaller ones know they went away that way they fall a big ones and slower than expected no but they're going to do it and the moving and then moving fast. Soon they'll be there and they will be there squealing and bringing across and it's going to run 10% each time up to 30% and then it's 15% up to 60% and 20% and then the rest of them and one big chunk and that's how it goes so far the 10% that went across made it so many holes the whole place is hissing no but a good chunk of it and the holes actually are not connected but some of them are and they will finally make their way across if it were left alone it would go across in about 2 months but it's making it I expect the next bunch to go across in about a week depending on what happens sometimes the big ones send signals and they could be heard pretty damn far away and it's really really awful sounds like a screech.

---is it hits it and say you're putting up a barrier we're going to eat them up and use them for strength and they're getting healthier and about a week they'll be healthy and start pulling them in and they won't be able to stop the next batch will be sent in hopes of killing the hunters and no encourage it and that's how it's going to go and it will clear the gulf I'm going to be a fight over the gulf for what's below I'll find out that it's full of uranium and they can't get to it at all and diamonds and more

---you don't have much sympathy for them but they're human beings and they went the wrong way and we have some traits that they have they were afraid to change it to them a little and we feel bad because I did let it go on it is still there and it's horrible

More shortly

Olympus

The war is tiring but he's doing is tiring and he'll be okay that the walls have to actually drive for the electrical to work so he's fine

Hera

Haha well CAA is saying he didn't pay for the class he thinks you're paying 50 bucks for it yeah that's one it's terrific it's kind of worked out that way but you are not really sure cuz he put the walls together they feel tight but it's not airtight and then you thought the particles come down and that's what happens and I guess we had too much uranium and the radiation is true and happened before so we get it.

---Southern huge things happening seeing not around and our ships are up for it and stuff it's real crazy but it's working some people think they scanned it and it won't stop thinking about it or pointing it out and we're going after them

---they were about 4 million lost in the rings and 3 million in The glades and that's a lot for Sunday it's not slow today national guard tried to get there a bunch of times and they can't and effect to send housing assistance people to the Red Cross temporary shelter Port Charlotte our sun is at. He thought it was great and he thanked them and he said they're doing great and she said oh no. So he's saying in space okay Joe help me out and Preston is you're going to make it worse and he goes Preston and it says it's going down and he does the drum snare. So she's staring straight and I'm going what the hell am I going to do now and it's just don't move a muscle. So kind of giggling and she left. It's a lot of people folks and they're gone innocent had people and goals and aunts and some of them were his relatives for real only all are and they're getting hurt too. There's nothing's going on we have to talk about it.

Stolen from Ben andac by Mac proper their Castle block design. Same with stanand missy their use of things combinations used our sonyup.

Stolen.

--+I'm trying to have a life but we do recognize it LOL just wait until they get into it. We have some other things too they are that we are having a war here there are going to go into it more we need to it's getting very stressful here at the down too 3.6 originals about 2.0% leadership morlock Max and then down to 3.7% pseudo empire 12% clones

---huge changes are coming Trump is under fierce attack it's for his REM songs. And my son was saying something weird wasn't too loud that people hurt him and he will come and he says ugh find out he was sleeping and having a nightmare I feel bad.

---so a census to stand my God the walls are bleeding s*** Stan says shut your freaking mouth instead of laughing and Sherry is laughing and Tommy f is threatening to pull his pants down this is kind of scary monsters series he wants people to make comments in the movie theater maybe we can report on which comments are the best and then go all over the world and he says one of them is what the guy in the playing the same something like shut up about that sh so we are actually watching them laugh but it's funny. So we're going ahead and explaining what's happening or what happened today the Eastern hemisphere of these pseudo empires at 30% they're the severe threat and dress and they lost are at 40% of their ground is lasers and their losing more ships they're down to about 21 million.

---and there's some other numbers bja is making games and has 34 million ships Tommy F has 3.5 million and he is attracting the attention of these pseudo empire Trump at 90% we think 95% by tomorrow

We're going to print and his wife wants to say some things

Thor Freya

Olympus

Get water then indigestion ok good job today nope. But ok. Cover worked out. Saw it it's all ruined.tallyit ok

Hera I help

---

[umichenginabroad]

[week 6] an eventful weekend with eurail

Ahoj everyone! 

Welcome back to my blog where we’ve had a very eventful week of traveling with a bunch of ups and downs. With that being said, let's jump right in!

Starting off the week in Prague, it was very chill where I just tried to recover my sleep schedule and continue working through my statistics course. I did end up finding a really great coffee shop called Venue where I had a cappuccino and a butterfly pea iced tea, both of which were amazing.

The original plan for the weekend was to take a 5:45 am train to Budapest on Thursday, stay for 2 days, then take a train to Vienna for 2 days, and come back on Sunday night to Prague. However, Thursday morning my three alarms did not go off which was very unfortunate and we ended up needing to get on the next train which was at 7:55 am. We also did not have any seat reservations anymore because it was a different train. We were very lucky because we found a cabin where a nice British man invited us to sit with him. I basically slept for the entire 7 hour train ride and finally arrived in Budapest. 

We did everything we could to see as much of the city as possible in the 2 days we were there. On day one, we visited the famous Parisi Udvar hotel, Buda Castle, the Fisherman’s Bastion, and a few other spots in the city with some amazing views. Unfortunately, it was almost 100 degrees the days we were in Budapest so we definitely could not do as much as we would have liked due to the insane heat. 

On day two, we had brunch at this restaurant which had a garden greenhouse vibe to it and it was very very good. We visited St. Stephen’s Basilica, Margaret Island, and the Hungarian Parliament building before we had our Prosecco river cruise, which is a staple activity for visiting the city. We unfortunately ran into a few issues that evening, but everyone ended up being okay but it definitely lowered Budapest in our rankings of places we’ve traveled to. 

The following morning we took a train to Vienna for 2 hours. Unfortunately, the train before the one we got on was canceled so our train was extremely overcrowded and we were forced to stand for the entire trip. Thankfully, when we got to Vienna things started to go a lot better for us. We met up with a bunch of other CEA friends and toured Belvedere Palace before we rested for a few hours before dinner. At dinner we tried the local delicacy of Wiener Schnitzel which was pretty good, but a bit overpriced in my opinion. 

On Sunday, we stored all of our bags in storage so we could explore for the entire day. We visited all of the major sites in the city center including the Opera, City Hall, Parliament, and a bunch of museums and palaces. We also took the train to Schonbrunn Palace which was absolutely beautiful. After all of that we made it onto the train and I once again slept for the 4 hours back to Prague. 

That is about it for this past week! Next week I will be heading to Croatia for my last weekend trip before finals and I can’t wait. Thank you so much for reading and I’ll see y’all next week!

Matt Sinanis :)

Aerospace Engineering

Engineering in Prague 

[atelier27]

Check out this listing I just added to my Poshmark closet: SANGRIA Soft Peach Stretch Knit Dress, Size 12.

[johnconstantinejld]

Gotham Tales-Catwoman

The Isis Eye of Cambyses was a wonderful pick. At the Battle of Pelusium, the Persians under Cambyses II defeated the Egyptians by placing cats in front of their army. The Egyptians therefore hesitated to attack. Cruel, but smart. I had a dream where we on a cruise liner, Bruce and me. Sailing away from all this. But that was all it was. A dream.

 I’m sure I would have been able to find something in France, even try my luck getting in and out of the Louvre. The Alte Pinakothek in Munich, perhaps. I could try the Neue Nationalgalerie, The Seccession Building in Vienna, or the Kunsthistoriches. Maybe we’d be in London, and I’d try my luck at a gallery there. Mr Wayne would mysteriously donate an item from the British Museum back to Greece or Egypt? No, the columns are too big. But I would send a pretty little item to the Greek Consulate or Embassy. I wish I had a contact there who would send things in the diplomatic bag. 

Well, a woman can dream.

Back to the Eye. First, I had to ensure it wasn’t a fake. Magpie might have made a lethal copy of it. Also, didn’t want Ivy or Harley to get to it now, but the former is missing, and the latter is partially in that League thing I hear about. None of that for me. Penguin had his eye on the statue of Isis but got his dynasty wrong. He was off by a century, apparently. Not that the Gotham Museum disagreed. They promised him a review and said they would return promptly. He reminded them of a little bit of history.

I came for the cat statue, but there was another thing there which caught my eye. Whilst I wouldn’t usually go out of my way to steal multiple things, the necklace with the jet mourning stone from Whitby. 1830s/1840s, according to the inscription. Whilst Victorian mourning pieces are common, my friend at the antiques store should be pleased with its quality. 

It's of vital importance to keep a balance. We don’t want to give off too much of an air of wealth, but we don’t want to look poor, do we? Thankfully, Mike doesn’t ask personal questions. Did I inherit the jewel, find it in an attic or what? And he gives a real good price. He doesn’t just take and only prefer serious things. ‘I mean, we do get very few Victorian working-class clothes, you know. Because they were all worn through. We get the Sunday best.’

Hey, we all got to make a living. You do your way of taking back the city, I’ll do it my way. I am a tiger, a lioness. A lioness hunts more than the man; they are the mothers as the men lie back. They are the real deal. You thought Poison Ivy trapping a man in her vines or paralysing him before she Lizzie Borden’s him with an axe is bad? Nope. Lionesses, bitch. Here me roar.

Maybe Nightwing is interested in someone else. After all, he split from Daddy. Imagine how well we can work together. Try working with Mummy for a bit.

Another lady is swooping down. I hear her. Footfall as soft as those of a kitten. 

A hand on my shoulder.

‘Hand it over.’

Sorry, girl. I only hand it over for. I turn to face Batgirl, wrap my whip around her neck, and keep her upright to look her in the eye. I wonder how much Penguin would pay for your utility belt, sweetie. Ivy would also be intrigued by it, I’m sure, not that we get in contact much (She’ll get back to me if I can send in a jungle cat, though). Ivy would certainly enjoy being able to combat Batgirl, but that involves finding a way to trade the belt, and that lady has no interest in ransom.

Batgirl grabs my hands, twirls me around. 

‘Nice try, Selina, but not tonight.’

Oh…

‘There was a man in the alley off 42nd Avenue. Cuts to his face like claw marks. Then he had his eyes pierced. Why?’

Oh, Batgirl. What would you do if you saw a man doing what he was doing to a woman? He sure wasn’t collecting for charity. 

‘They don’t know if they can restore his sight.’

Too bad. He should have thought of that. Doesn’t that Huntress woman use a crossbow anyway? If you excuse me.

‘We’ve got you down for theft. I didn’t think we’d put you down for manslaughter. If he dies, the charge will be upgraded. Then you, um, grabbed the woman around the face, criticised her for waiting for the big strong Batman to rescue her, and took a Benjamin out of her purse?'

I’m going. Talk to the tail.

‘You’re going nowhere.’

He’s standing right in front of me. I hand it over for him. He gives to Batgirl, who slips away. I would have thought she would in turn hand it on to one of the Bat-boys, but it’s her that leaves to return to the museum. And so, I’m standing there. No conversation tonight, it seems. I try the alluring eyes, but nothing from him.

He goes his way, I go mine. A ship’s horn blares somewhere. A cruise liner heads away. 

Maybe, we could go to Paris.

But he’d never give this up, my dark prince charming. 

I’d give this up the moment he does.

That means never.  

Until the next night. Whenever I see that signal, it’s date night.

Oh, well. Like I said, I am the lioness.

Hear me roar.

[purplesurveys]

1713

What were you doing 45 minutes ago? Doing another survey. I'm telling you, I like making my Sundays as boring as possible.

What was the last thing you said aloud? Can't really remember. I've been alone the last two hours.

Have you bought anything new this week? Other than food, no.

Name one person who made you smile today. Jo. BFF finally graduated and I guess I'm particularly emotional aboout her graduation because I was witness to most of the trials she went through to get to this point, and holy shit was the road for her rocky for the most part. She is what Yoongi meant when he said, "Dream, may all your trials end in full bloom."

What’s the last thing you had to drink? Coffee.

Ever go camping? Nah, it’s never been something that appeals to me. Maybe if we lived somewhere with guaranteed decent weather I would give it a go, but around here it just rains all the time haha. < Same with me, except that here it's either way too hot, or rains way too hard.

What’s your favorite candy? Chewy ones, like Fruitella.

Do you send messages on Facebook a lot? Yes, that's where I communicate with literally every non-work person ever. Messenger is a necessity at this point given I don't even text anymore except for work.

Have you ever gone to a strip club? I have never gone inside one but would like to try to at least once.

Last sporting event you watched? The Philippines vs Norway, Women's World Cup just this afternoon. We mounted a public watch party given that one of my clients is a major sponsor for our national team.

We lost – and subsequently lost our place in the World Cup – but it doesn't feel like we have lost at all. It's big enough of a win to have the Philippines even just be part of the World Cup, let alone WIN A MATCH (against New Zealand, last Tuesday). It's chilling to be alive for such historic achievements and I love our Filipinas to bits :')

What were you doing at 8am this morning? Fast asleep.

Anything you wish you could change? Yes I wish we can have 4-day work weeks.

Do you go in at a fast food place or drive thru? Drive-thru or delivery always. I genuinely can't tell you the last time I actually dined inside a fast food place.

What do you think when you hear Australia? Stores closing early. And the Irwin family.

Who’s the last person you talked to on the phone? A media contact who was asking for additional slots under his reservation for the watch party earlier.

Do you like Chinese food over pizza? Nah. Chinese food can be great, but the casual kind like Panda Express is usually shit and comes off as inauthentic. You'd have to go to a sit-down restaurant to really enjoy the full flavors and experience of Chinese food; whereas good pizza is pretty easy to find.

Do you have a tan? I'm just...naturally tan. I don't need to 'have' a tan.

Biggest annoyance in life right now? I'm nearly out of vape juice and every puff is tasting increasingly smokier and shittier, but all the shops are closed and I wouldn't be able to get a replacement till like 10 AM tomorrow at the earliest.

Do any of your friends have children? Not my friends, but I have several classmates in my batch who now do.

Are you jealous of anyone? Nah.

Where is your dad? He lives where he works (i.e. a cruise ship), and I imagine at this hour he has just woken up and is getting ready to start work. I'm not actually sure though if he works weekends? I'll need to ask him that; he doesn't typically talk about his job with us so I know very little about his everyday routine.

Any plans today? All I wanna do is eat and take surveys and watch BTS later tonight. Enjoy what's left of my weekend until I'm too exhausted to keep my eyes open.

Do you drink your soda with a straw? I don't drink soda. I do like straws with my coffee though.

Last song listened to? All Day by Namjoon and Tablo.

Do you take vitamins daily? No.

Is anyone jealous of you? Not that I know.

What are you doing tomorrow? It'll just be work again. It'll be a Monday though so I imagine the workload will be 5x more than usual.

What’s your favorite number? 7.

Do you have a maid come in and clean your house? No and that's not usually the case here. For households with house help, they usually live in the house and have their own rooms. I remember finding it very unusual when I first learned how in other countries, maids will drop by to do their job but leave at the end of the day. Cultural differences, I guess.

Can you say the alphabet backwards? I can't. I know someone who can though.

Cedar Point or Six Flags? Whatever.

Have you ever slept in until 1 PM? Not straight. It's always staggered – like I'd wake up at 9 AM, go back to sleep, wake up at 11 AM, go to sleep, then wake up at 1.

Do you believe in love at first sight? No but I also don't judge if other people claim it happened to them.

Do you like the show Viva La Bam? I have never see it. Not my type of show.

How many kids do you want to have? None forever and ever and ever.

Have you ever gone behind your parents' backs? Yes.

Have you ever lost someone? Of course.

Where did you get your worst scar from? An overly excited Cooper.

What time did you wake up today? Around 9:10 AM.

Have you ever tried to erase someone from your memory? Mhm.

Last meal? A croissant from Dunkin. I'm still eating it though. Then right after this I'll be eating a cinnamon doughnut, also from Dunkin.

Do you like coco pebbles the cereal? I've never tried! I've had Fruity Pebbles though; I bought it purely because The Rock once referenced it in a promo with John Cena. It got super over to the point that I wanted to check out what the fuck these 'Fruity Pebbles' were, lol.

Last time you saw your father? It'll be three weeks this Friday :) I'll be seeing him again this November.

Last time you cried? The other day when I was watching Jungkook's reaction to this year's ARMY song. Man cried live and in front of 11,000,000 people and his voice even broke when he tried to speak, how could I not cry with him lol??

When you get married what do you think you’ll put most of your focus and money into? Coming from my experience in PR and mounting events I feel like I would be very particular about event elements lol. Like making sure the food selection fits what our guests would like, having enough activities or prompts to do so people enjoy their whole time there, approving the music choices, etc. Also generally making sure the program flow is in perfect shape from start to finish.

Probably not the best priority in the first place, which is why I am NOT cut out for marriage anyway hah.

Would you freak out if you were to get pregnant by the last person you hooked up with? I have never hooked up with anyone but in theory yes I would freak out in any case.

When’s the last time something turned out better than expected? Last Friday. Just work stuff falling into place at the last possible moment, when I thought they wouldn't.

Who in your life causes you the most stress or negative feelings? Myself. And my clients. :) They're all so very nice and understanding but at the end of the day we have a work relationship, so I can't help but associate feelings of stress with them.

Have you ever had a teacher that also taught your parents? Nah. My dad and I attended the same university, but there was no overlap in profs as far as I know because our courses are vastly different from one another to begin with – he took up hotel and restaurant management; I did journalism.

What’s something you complain about frequently? Never-ending work and parents who think their noisy fucking kids have the right to own the world.

Do you have anything planned for the summer? That time of the year is done. My one scheduled plan then was my trip to Bangkok to see Yoongi :D I still can't believe I get to say I saw BTS DJKFHDJKFHDFFLS

Do you walk fast or slow? Fast or moderate, depending on what I'm walking for. I only ever walk slow in museums, I think.

What form of public transport do you use most often? Continued from last Sunday. I don't use public transport. If I need to go somewhere and can't drive, I book a Grab.

Is there any alcohol in the fridge? Yeah I have a few bottles of soju and beer.

Is any part of you sad at all? Maybe not sad, just tired and in need of another break.

Who was the last person to disappoint you? Just a few family members with some questionable opinions.

Have you ever let someone go? Yes.

Are you a patient person? It differs. I'm patient with things like waiting in line or if a server messes up at a restaurant, but I can be impatient at work.

Do you think you’ve changed over the past year? Yeah, for sure. This time last year I was in a bit of a professional and emotional rut, and that has since faded for the most part. Also I was a looooot more inexperienced in my role as a manager, something I'm confident to say I've grown from.

Is there something that happened in your past you hate talking about? Sure. I'm an open book and have no issues tackling the past but that doesn't necessary mean I *like* talking about some memories, if that makes sense.

Your ex is sitting next to you, what do you do? If they were willing and were friendly enough, I'd greet them and quickly catch up.

Are you someone who worries too often? Only about work, but otherwise I like to be carefree these days.

Have you ever been completely alone with a boy in his room? Not a boy.

Do you ever think “what if” about anything? Of course, can't avoid those thoughts sometimes.

Is the last person you kissed older than you? No.

Does everyone deserve a second chance? Nope.

Are you emotionally strong? I try to be. I've been through my fair share of shit and from all those moments I've learned to just get the fuck up after allowing myself to cry a bit.

Is there anyone you don’t wanna lose? Of course.

Are you the type of person who seeks out revenge? No. I'm passive-aggressive sometimes when I know I'm in the right but plotting Actual Revenge just seems so childish at this point.

Do you think two people can last forever? Sure. It's a comforting thought to have about relationships.

Do you like falling asleep listening to the rain? Yes!!! Sometimes I'll even turn on like an hour-long raining sound effect video if I have trouble falling asleep.

Is your current hair color your natural hair color? It isn't.

Do you believe that the last person that you kissed cares for you? No.

Are you happy with the choices you’ve made? I'm happy with some; I have no choice but to just move forward with some others.

Do you honestly have feelings for someone at the moment? Continued from the night before, again. Nope.

Have you ever slept in the same bed as the opposite sex? No.

Are there things in your life that you’ll never be able to get over? Sure, for better and for worse.

Have you dated someone older than you? Nope.

[lindsaystravelblogs3]

Days 50-52 – Friday-Sunday, 14-16 July More Greek Islands.

Friday

We should have visited Rome today but somehow, we got diverted – all Rhodes lead to Rome, but we were still just on Rhodes!  There are a few options for activities each day, but we had to choose what we wanted to do a couple of months ago and we generally chose what we imagined were some of the less strenuous things – Oops, did we get that wrong!.  We chose a bus trip that took us all over the Island – probably at least a hundred kilometres at a guess.  The port is in the middle of the west coast of the island and our first stop was in the extreme south-east, at St John’s Harbour, where St John was believed to have arrived.  We stopped for photos in a couple of places and it looked pretty wonderful with people enjoying the cool water way below us, and others walking the ramparts of the fortified citadel on the mountain above - while we just sweated.  It was idyllic, but very crowded and much too hot to stand around for long.  I spent a few minutes trying to photograph a small bird, but even then, I was chased back on the bus due to the heat.

We drove halfway back to the ship to a place where we sampled some ouzo and had a snack in an outdoor restaurant – all part of the tour.  The woman who sat next to me for the snack wandered off to take some photos and fell down a step and hurt her hands and knees – after some recent knee surgery.  I was near her, also taking photos at the time, so helped her back to the table where she got plenty of attention.  They rang the ship’s doctor, so he was on hand when we got back on board – and he was treating another woman who had fallen when we turned up.  Greece must be a dangerous place.

We had another excellent lecture during the afternoon.  Despite the ancient Greek history being almost irrelevant today, as well as me having a great deal of difficulty separating real events from Greek mythology, both our lecturers are quite brilliant.  They have an incredible range of knowledge and have a knack of bringing the ancient events alive and up to date.  They can show a slide of a little figure or a drinking bowl and explain a huge amount of symbolism in the design or the illustration on the side of the item.  I have found it quite fascinating even if there doesn’t seem to be much relevance for us today.  (Alas, I am sometimes doubtful as to whether the ancient artist had quite the same thoughts as today’s analysts have in interpreting the original symbolism.  Maybe they just wanted to make a pretty ewer.)

They always have some drinks and French pastries or other delicacies late in the afternoon and we have indulged in them most days.  They are all too sweet for us but there is always some gentle music to enjoy – a tinkling piano or some soft singing being the main entertainment.

They have a Gala Dinner (sometimes two) on each cruise when the Captain hosts a table and we were selected to be two of his six guests for dinner tonight.  A six-course dinner is a bit much, but the courses are quite small so we managed.  I have no idea how they select the guests (we avoided the honour on our two previous Ponant cruises) but it turned out quite a bit more comfortable and enjoyable than I envisaged.  I was at one end of the table a little away from the captain so spent a lot more time speaking with other guests, but Heather was at his elbow and spent time talking with him.  He is only forty and looks very young, but once the meal was over, it became a lot easier for all of us to join in the conversation and he was easy to talk to and everyone seemed very comfortable and satisfied with the evening.

I have to say that the numerous extended conversations we have had with other passengers have been orders of magnitude more engaging than on most of our other cruises and tours.  I suspect this is because the type of person wishing to join a Smithsonian Cruise is more intellectually focussed than most people on our other trips.  That probably makes this one a little more challenging in some ways, but also more stimulating and satisfying.  I feel that I should have read a lot of Greek mythology ahead of the cruise.

After dinner, we went down to the main bar area where we saw the end of the night’s show.  We only saw a few minutes of it, but there were several dancers in the most elaborate costumes performing under coloured lights with lots of upbeat music.  Impressive, but maybe our extended discussion around the Captain’s table was more enthralling, at least for me.

Saturday

Today, we were at Santorini – a place I have always wanted to visit since Heather and I got together almost forty years ago.  She had just come back to Australia after travelling in Europe with her kids and her description of Santorini always sounded so interesting and romantic that I thought it would be a special destination.  And it was!

It was not at all how I imagined it, but it was just as beautiful and interesting, even if it nearly killed me.  I expected to see lots of white cube-like houses with blue domes but saw almost none.  But still enough to build the picture for me.

Santorini was a volcanic island that was almost destroyed in what is thought to be one of the most monstrous explosive volcanic blasts in history.  It blew away most of the island leaving only a caldera that was filled by the sea – I reckon the caldera is about five kilometres in diameter and nobody knows how deep, so it was a big blast – estimated to be at least four times as powerful as Krakatoa and that was one big bang.  Now, it all looks so peaceful with a partial ring of mountains crusted on top with glistening white houses, looking for all the world like snow-capped mountains – or maybe the icing on a very big cake.

There have been subsequent eruptions, one of the most recent creating an island (Nea Kameni) in the caldera that I climbed today.  We were delivered to the uninhabited island by tender and then it was a climb to the clouds – actually, there were no clouds, but it seemed high enough.  Heather made it partway up and sat in a tiny skerrick of shade while I trudged on.  There were crests after crests and approaching each gave a feeling of relief because you thought that was surely the top – only to find another crest further away and even higher – and then another, and another, and another.  One of the guides walked with me, I suspect to ensure I didn’t cark it en route, but once we finally reached the top in a swelter of sweat, he drifted off and I made my way back down to Heather much more easily, and thence back to the tender and on to the ship.  I was exhausted and had to sit for a while and have a cool shower before I was ready to tackle lunch.

My target was the top - and proof that I made it. (Photo credit: our guide, John King)

A lot of people stayed on the main island instead of returning to the ship, and many climbed the zigzag route to the village at the top of the mountain.  That is one of the things Heather talked about all those years ago – the precipitous donkey ride up the side of the cliff to the village.  The donkeys (or their progeny) still trudge along taking people to the top (or bottom) but it seems that the Health and Safety people have visited, and the route is a lot safer than it was forty years ago.  There is also a funicular there now that seemed to be doing some brisk business, but the crowds were horrific.  There were five cruise ships in port on the day – three Norwegian ships, two with over four thousand five hundred passengers each and the other with a mere four thousand, a smaller ship with a couple of thousand passengers, and our pathetic little craft with only a couple of hundred passengers.  The quayside was appalling with everyone pushing and shoving in endless queues to even buy a drink.  We raided a fridge and paid a waiter direct, rather that attempting to front the counter and fight with the crowd.

There was another great lecture in the afternoon, focussed on the evolution of the Acropolis – the stages in which it was built and destroyed and finally excavated and partially restored.  One interesting takeaway was that the Parthenon and all the other buildings and ruins on the Acropolis are as they were in the fifth century CE (AD) and all the previous iterations have effectively been removed.  What we see there now is basically less than two thousand years old, rather than anything from the several thousand years earlier in which other versions of the site existed.  It seems that history is not quite history – just what remains after the latest conquerors have rewritten it for us to imagine.

There was a classical Concert and a Latin Dancing session in the Lounge at night, but we missed them both.  After our climb, we went to bed to sleep and recover – at least a little.

Sunday

Another exhausting day!  We are in Amorgos today and it is surprisingly a lot more how I had imagined Santorini – lots of blue and white everywhere, quite a few domed roofs, and all absolutely beautiful.

We had an early start and were well on our way on the bus before 8am.  We crossed the island and followed the coast a little to a hairpin bend where the bus reversed several hundred metres along the edge of an amazing cliff to a tiny parking area – there is no way the bus could have done even a fifty-point turn down there!  Then it was just a simple stroll up the cliff to the Hozoviotissa Monastery clinging to the precipice close to the clouds (of which there were none - again).  The reason for the early start was to try to avoid the forecast heat, but it was very hot even before we started the climb.  The ship had contacted the Monastery the day before to ensure we could get in and were told that there was going to be a service in the church, but that would be finished before 9am and we could get straight in if we arrived at 9am – so we did.  They claim that there are just 269 steps up to the monastery, but that depends on how you define a step.  In many places, the steps were very big steps, so they had built a few smaller steps to enable you to mount the bigger ones.  My body reckons there were about ten thousand steps, necessitating numerous pauses to recover some breath along the way.

Getting close to the big non-event.

Heather did a great job but conked out halfway up so sat on one of the steps huddled down for a tiny bit of shade cast from the low wall at the side of the steps – but I trudged on.  (Silly me!!)  I am usually quite nervous of heights but I was fine going up and down – but not at all happy at the top of the climb.  At least two people started the climb and had to turn back because of their own height phobias.

So here we are, sweating like pigs and gasping for air, aching all over from the strenuous effort and arriving the monastery door at ten past nine – to find that the service hasn’t started yet so we can’t go in.  There is not a blade of shade anywhere and the only place to sit is on the wall at the edge of the steps with a thousand-foot drop into the sea immediately behind us.  Did I mention I was a bit uncomfortable at the top of the climb? – and not just from the extreme exertion.

The service went on for an hour and we were almost dying in the blazing sun.  Our guide spent at least ten minutes hammering on the door, trying to get the attention of someone inside, and at last the door opened – no, you can’t come in until the service is finished!  How long will that be?  Maybe another half an hour – and we had been there in the sun for fifty minutes now.  I gave up and started back to collect Heather, but I heard our guide pleading for them to let us in where we could shelter from the sun.  It turns out that our group was allowed to stand inside the foyer (but in bad grace, somewhat contrary to Christian charity), but I had had more than enough and kept steadfastly undoing all the hard work I had done in climbing the cliff.  The other two groups and numerous individuals who had made the ascent hadn’t been there as long as us and were not allowed in. 

Heather was fine – surprisingly – and had the company of a cat and two cute little kittens.  There have been healthy-looking cats everywhere during the past few days, almost all quite small cats, allegedly all neutered (although I doubt that: otherwise, how could there be so many of them around?).  Their diminutive stature may be hereditary, but equally, it may be a lack of nutrition, but either way, they are very cute and pretty.

I was pretty disillusioned with the whole thing.  I had exhausted myself climbing the mountain and back down again, as well as sitting around with no shade for at least an hour in very hot weather, and still didn’t get to see any of the ‘attraction’ that was the cause of all the angst.  Not happy Jan!

The bus took us back to one side of Chora (the capital towns of most of the islands are called Chora) where we were treated to a glass (or two) of the local brew, Raki, very powerful stuff it was too.  Ouzo is supposed to be forty-proof, but this stuff is about sixty-proof, and very tasty, so you are tempted to take a second or third glass to your own detriment.  They also gave us a local cake and some water, probably to dilute the stuff – but we did enjoy it and both went back for more.  A good job the glasses were quite small.

We then walked through the village with our guide striding out ahead, making it a bit hard to hear what she said, but we stopped outside a cute little church fronting a cute little village square – everything in blazing blue and dazzling white.  Some people went wandering, but we just sat and enjoyed a drink.  There was a special service coming to a close in the church, with lots of loud singing and chanting, celebrating the special day for the village’s patron saint, so everything was crowded, but it was the picture-perfect blue-and-white Greek village.  We sat under a big Aussie gum tree in the middle of the tiny square and I simply loved it.  All too soon, we were back on the bus, back on the tender, and back on the ship – just in time for giros for lunch.

Drinks in the village - just before it got really crowded.

[crystallizedkingdoms]

I kinda wanna fix up the lyrics for Sunday Cruise’s songs on genius cuz they’re either super incorrect or formatted weirdly. and they just don’t deserve that treatment