#am i a bad friend for this? perhaps. is it hilarious? definitely.

[jade-len]

so today i tricked my very straight male friend into reading svsss.

okay look, i wasn't planning to at first and it's not like it was completely my fault. he wanted to read it!

i was showing him how badly they fucked up mu qingfang in the donghua by comparing it to the english novel design (he said that mu qingfang went from looking like a soft dilf to a predator registered on the epstein island list). and then, i showed him how different some of the other character designs were like gongyi xiao's ("he looks like he'd be a genshin character" -friend, to eng novel design) and luo binghe's ("lowkey, he kinda gives airbender vibes" -friend, to bunhe eng novel design)

so that was all i was gonna show him, nothing else. but after seeing them, he goes, "these designs actually look hella cool. what's the book called?"

now, do i:

A. tell him the name, eventually revealing that it's a danmei when he looks it up?

B. just straight up tell him that it's a danmei?

C: don't tell him the name just yet, spill the summary, get him interested, and tell him to not search anything up about it because there's heavy spoilers and it will reveal them the moment he types it up on the search bar

i go with C, obviously.

me: so, basically, some guy named shen yuan transmigrates into an incel harem male power fantasy novel where the protagonist, luo binghe, has hundreds of wives. thing is though, the guy pretty much took over the body of binghe's teacher he had when he was a teenager, who turns out to be a really scummy dude. and now he has to be nice to him so that the protagonist doesn't rip off his limbs and put him into a pickle pot in the future to suffer for eternity.

friend: that sounds hilarious and horrifying at the same time.

me: yes it is, and you should read it. it's like. my favorite novel at the moment. but don't search up anything about it because people spoil that shit. i'll let you borrow my novel

friend: nah don't worry, i'll just pirate it

friend: wait. does it have pictures?

me, my plan coming together: yeah, it has pictures. buuut, when you pirate it, it doesn't. trust me dude, i tried and was severely disappointed. plus, the physical copy is so much better

friend: fuck yeah ok thanks

me: hold on though. i'll text you later to see if my friend who's borrowing it rn is done reading it

he's hyped. he's excited. he craves a good book and a good transmigration interpretation. he's especially happy about the fact that it takes place in a chinese setting with cool powers and an actual good main character. "this sounds so good, god i wanna read it so bad."

i tell him that binghe is actually adorable, too. that it's pretty much found family! my friend then asks if shen yuan adopts him and becomes a father figure or something.

and i said "yes". you know, like a liar. (the father figure part probably isn't a lie though)

now i'm gonna give him the novel tomorrow! of course, i'm gonna cover the chapter 2 bunhe sexual awakening scene with washi tape and say that my baby cousin (sorry baby cousin, you would never <\3) scribbled all over that paragraph with her markers, and since i'm a neat book freak, i put washi tape and just wrote the scene! i don't know if that's really all too believable, but he didn't seem to care that much. just a simple "if my baby cousin did that to my book i would punt them into the sun"

i think what'll be more hilarious is the fact that you can't really tell that svsss is a BL. especially not volume 1. there's like, only a few lines indicating, but if you remove the baby binghe sexual awakening scene then you probably won't be able to know (...if you don't really read romance or anything. idk he's kinda dense anyways). so let's hope he gets attached and has a slow descent into the homo before i drop svsss vol 2 on him!

ok anyways i'll update you guys later with a reblog. maybe in about two or three days lol

(also don't worry, we already fuck around with each other on a daily basis like this. he's already tricked me into reading some manga i was unprepared for, and i thought that it'd be funny to mess around with him using svsss this time lol)

[slowd1ving]

STRESS, STRAIN: THE TALE OF YOUNG MODULUS AND A FORLORN PHYSICS STUDENT ゜゜・BLADE DRABBLE

Dealing with a stalker roommate? No problem, Kafka's got the perfect solution: staying with the unapproachable and cold Blade. Teetering the thin line between sleeping on the streets and facing his rumored wrath, it sure is hard keeping your balance when the engineering student is anything but civil. gender-neutral, physics major reader paired with college au + band au (will come into play in another part I swear) see here for some basic designs for them warnings: some violence? consumption of alcohol, arguments, blade being a dick, college au wc: 6.3k

HONKAI STAR RAIL MASTERLIST

MASTERLIST ・゜・NAVIGATION

✧ Perhaps it’s lucky that your acquaintance Kafka finds you at your most dire of moments, or perhaps it’s your Achilles-level misfortune finally catching up to you. Dorm changes aren’t particularly infrequent, sure—but dealing with a stalkerish, obsessive roommate is definitely story-material for when you’re downing shots. Literature major Kafka isn’t one to turn her magnanimous back on whom she considers a friend, even if said friend is currently wallowing their sorrows away by complaining about the lack of available dorms to make the switch and drowning in hard liquor.  ✧ Saviour Kafka, who plays for notorious metal group Stellaron Hunters (she’s a suave electric violinist), finds this a perfect opportunity to help out the cute guitarist from the rival Trailblazers! Her deft fingers are already sending a message to her pinned contact and drummer: Bladie, finally found you a roommate. Respond. It should be okay to put two college students (in bands infamous for their tense rivalry on– and off–campus) together in the proverbial lab rat cage; after all, neither of you are aware of who the other is behind the elaborate masks. It’s not like there’s a deficit of music groups at the Astral Institute—so who will ever know? Don’t ask how she knows the face behind the pretty Venetian mask. She won’t ever tell.   ✧ Honestly, she’s not sure how the bad blood started (she helped spread the rumours). All she cares about is doing you a solid!

“You think the streets will accept me for who I am?” Even with your head slumped over your forearms and the smell of cheap vodka clinging to your clothes, Kafka thinks you look naively charming in the dim amber lights of a bar pretending to be upscale. And by naive, she means very naive—for real, how can a physics major be so gullible as to not question their roommate’s deranged tendencies until it’s far too late? It’s hilarious. 

She’d dissect how this mood is perfectly, pathetically fallacious to your situation; yet her mind is too honed in on the buzz of her phone as Blade finally replies to her text. 

“Kafka,” you bawl into a stack of papers you’d salvaged from your ransacked dorm. “What if the asphalt doesn’t like me when I’m sleeping in the streets?”

21:48 > ok. 

Kafka, being an expert at metaphorical and allegorical interpretation, translates Blade-speak easily: let’s discuss this tomorrow, please and thank you. 

“Found you a roomie,” she murmurs delightedly, watching with her hawk-keen eyes as you sit up drunkenly. 

“That was fast, even for you,” you wipe your eyes cautiously—still wracked with the occasional hiccup. “Who is it?”

“Blade. You know him?”

✧ That sobers you right up.  Of course you know him. Nicknamed Blade for how cold and unfriendly he is, you’ve personally seen him in engineering lectures: making people shiver from just his gaze alone, and on one notable occasion, making his project partner cry after his infamously harsh criticism of her proposal. It’s common knowledge that he practises various martial arts, but the rumours that circle around him like vultures whisper of how he uses them on the streets. But whilst you doubt the reliability of the latter talk, it’s hard not to picture his hands dripping sanguine when his eyes glint the same shade.  ✧ Honestly, how bad could it be? It’s not like you have any other options unless you want to wake up with your roommate standing over you while you sleep again. After her, you doubt he’ll be any more of a walking nightmare.  ✧ Perfect!—Kafka is a bit too enthusiastic at your reluctant nodding, but you cast it from your mind as you pack your stuff with Caelus and Stelle standing behind you like a pair of twin guard dogs. One good thing about this is that you can finally take your guitar with you (rather than storing it safely at Dan Heng’s room) to the apartment—because of course he’s too good for the dorms. Though, after experiencing your batshit roommate, you really can’t blame him for avoiding this area.  ✧ Maybe, just maybe, the rumours about him being insane too are false and you can finally have a peaceful night’s rest without fearing for your life. 

Yeah right. You hate him. You genuinely hate the man over in the room next door. The passage of time on your phone indicates it’s only been a week since you showed up with five boxes of belongings and a nervous smile on your lips—but the agony you’re going through prolongs this mental period to eternity. 

Sisyphus embodies futility for evermore; as do you when you’re knocking on his door for the nth time to beg him to quiet down on his drums. The timings are so meticulous and calculative that you’re sure you could work out a linear sequence to this situation if you tried. 

Exhausted from the laboratory job you’re juggling on top of band practice and reading on Dirac notations? No problem—Blade’s busy expressing how you feel in terms of loud crashing and banging that you hate to admit is (very technically) skilled.

Recalling your first encounter—your nervous smile and his cold indifference as you moved into the room next to his—it’s not hard to imagine that he’d be inconsiderate of you. Those red eyes had slid right past you like oil on water: judging you to be not worth his time to even greet properly. In fact, it’s like he’s trying to chase you out so you leave him alone for good. 

The deep mahogany door swings inward, and you’re left facing an unimpressed, scowling Blade. With the way he’s clutching those drumsticks, you’d think he was about to skewer you—but you’re a bit too preoccupied with how he’s only sporting a pair of loose navy trousers that cascade languidly from his hips. 

“What do you want?” Laconic as ever, he gets straight to the point with his question—as if he can’t possibly fathom why you’ve come knocking. Just like this morning, just like last night, the night before, the night before yesterday’s—every damned night is a problem. 

“For you to invest in soundproofing,” you scowl back, too tired to keep up the fragile facade of politeness. At least when you practise with the electric guitar, you can easily hook it up to a pair of headphones and protect the sanctity of silence elsewhere. Actually, you don’t think he even knows your guitar exists with how considerate you are of your asshole roommate. 

“Why should I?” he crosses his arms, looking directly down at you. If you looked closely, the slight stretch of his lips resembled a smirk—but you’re definitely mistaken, since the man never so much as smiles. The cold expression accompanying his crude words sums up his thoughts: if you don’t like it, beg Kafka for whatever other solution she has. 

His inky hair sways from where it’s tied back, and you resist the urge to yank it until he sees sense. 

“For better quality of life,” you grit out. 

Those eyes turn into sardonic crescents. “I’m good.”

And the door is shut. 

✧ Fortunately, you’ve managed to fall asleep in the middle of the practise room before on countless occasions; tuning the heavy thumping comes easy after a while when you’re exhausted and practically dead on your feet. The problem is during the day—doing your assigned reading and writing up results from practical work comes much harder when you’re constantly accompanied by the rhythmic percussion of a madman who favours metal. It gets so rowdy that you seriously consider whether he’s part of the Stellaron Hunters and knows you’re a Trailblazer—it would make sense, after all, if he was just feeling extra spiteful. However, from the trembling students claiming to be his previous roommates, this is just common treatment: him basically telling them to beat it and never return.  ✧ Two can play at that game. Upon complaining to Kafka of his (rage-inducing) musical tendencies, she suggests that you get back at him with your electric guitar. Don’t ask her how she knows, no she’s not trying to instigate and watch the chaos—Kafka attempts to reassure you. You don’t trust the shady writer one bit, but both Data Analysis major Dan Heng and Environmental Studies student March 7th give the plan the go ahead. If you’re not mistaken, you can hear a touch of personal grief in the normally composed Dan Heng’s voice—something so poignantly irritated you wonder what the story between them is.  ✧ Contrary to his nonchalant attitude, it’s clear he’s annoyed by the loud chords that buzz through the apartment. As soon as he picks up his drumsticks, you plug the guitar to the amps and thoroughly mess with him. You know enough from Caelus’ repertoire to place each genre of music Blade starts to play (which is limited to metal). No problem—you play various styles that decidedly aren’t metal and are so discordant with his own tempo you can’t help but keep a grin on your lips. He’s much too stubborn to knock on your door, but the irritated twitch of his eyes in the kitchen belies just how aggravating this is. And when you know he’s scrawling down notes for his classes, that’s when you’re practising your metal riffs and playing around with the fretboard. If you’re feeling particularly nice, you’ll play along to some darkwave gothic music—something relatively more calm—but these occasions are few and far between. 

Chromatic eyes pierce your back while you deftly chop vegetables for your dinner. Really, now’s the best time to do work: when you’re busy with cooking and not insistent on plaguing him with jarring melodies. For someone so logical when it comes to his meticulous classwork, he sure doesn’t seem it as he leans against the counter on the other side of the kitchen—sipping water and just staring at you while you Julienne an onion. 

You shoot him a withering glance as you toss the slices into a bowl on the side, and he glares at you with a matched fervour. If it weren’t for the fact that you literally don’t have anywhere else to go—Caelus doesn’t even have a couch for you to sleep on—you’d have moved out a long time ago. 

It’s a rustic space: sage green cabinets filled with charming, mismatched plates and cups; glossy white counters that house various herbs and the occasional plant; a lacquered table in the middle that has a vase holding a singular dried flower. An orange lily—still retaining a vibrancy that conceals just how long it’s been there. You wouldn’t have expected this style of decor from him, but at the same time, you doubt it’s his influence so much as Kafka’s. 

“Do you have a problem?” you probe icily, turning back to where you’re slicing a carrot into thin matchsticks; if there was a god somewhere, you’d hope it could transfigure the man behind you into the root vegetable you’re enthusiastically chopping. 

“No.” And when he speaks again, he’s right behind you. There’s a sink to your left, but he’s much too close as his breath ghosts over the nape of your neck. Affronted, you turn around; only to watch as his eyes widen minutely, glass of water slipping out of his grasp and spilling down your front. 

“You dickhead.” Your hands angrily grab at his collar—unheeding or perhaps uncaring of his reputation for violence as you feel the cold seep into your skin. You’re seething; for someone with such good reflexes, this is a new level of low in attempting to chase you out. Or perhaps it’s revenge for finally getting under his skin. “You did that on purpose, didn’t you?”

It’s a little too late when you realise the position you’re in: skin showing through the translucent material, breathing shallow from your infuriation, face glaring right up at his. 

“Sorry.” His voice rings out insincere—and there’s that damn faint smile still toying at his face as he looks directly at you with that heavy gaze. “My hand slipped.”

You shove him back, too disgusted to acknowledge him any further. Maybe if you turned back around, you’d see the tiniest pricks of red on his face as you tossed your soaked shirt into the washing machine—leaving you in a damp vest while you continued cooking for yourself. Maybe if you looked back at least once, you’d see the amusement in his eyes as you maul the bok choy on the cutting board. 

Those are maybes.

There’s particular things you know for certain. One, you despise him and his existence. Two, he abhors you and your entire being—because why else would he be so insistent in making you leave out of your own volition?

✧ It’s the time of year that you hate: joint engineering classes so you can cover the materials aspect for your physics studies. Well, it’s not like you hated it from the very beginning—you’ve hated it ever since you realised that once again, you’d have to be in the incorrigible presence of Blade. While he did finally install some soundproofing in his room, he’s taken it upon himself to linger wherever you’re present. Typing up your notes on the deep maroon couch with a mug of lavender tea perched on the coffee table? He’s in the window seat, looking over a thick reference manual for tensile strengths. Going to meet bassist Dan Heng so the two of you can play around with various lines for your next song? He’s at the convenience store you briefly stop at, gazing at you before he glares at your friend. Practising a slow solo in the living room (it’s really got the best ambience)? He’s tapping out a beat that you can very faintly now hear—one that surprisingly goes with the electrifying chords.  ✧ Point is, you’re ignoring him and his presence—while he’s inching ever closer. It comes to a head at the lecture hall; you decide to sit in the third row, since it’s both far from the back (where he usually frequents) and it doesn’t make you look like a beg. When you glance at his predestined seat, it’s empty—unsurprisingly as he’s there usually a minute before the professor—while the seat next to him is taken by a girl you’ve seen before. Despite his horrible personality and the (probably true) rumours surrounding him, there’s a few stragglers who genuinely want him. And you genuinely want those people to seek help because it’s clear something went wrong in their lives for them to be thirsting over a man who looks like he eats cigarettes for breakfast.  ✧ He comes in late, as you expect, but you freeze as he places his bag down next to you. Aghast, you can’t help but stare; yet for once he’s not meeting your eyes, and it’s far too late to make a scene and move elsewhere—not when the professor’s just arrived and is keen to start the lecture for materials. He doesn’t talk much, but you’re so distracted by his presence pressing slightly into your sides that you forget that today the professor’s deciding on the pairs for your projects—mouth agape, you stare in shock as she assigns them based on who’s sitting nearby. To be generous, she says, yet there’s nothing generous about this arrangement as his mocking eyes meet yours. He knew, you seethe, storming out of the hall right as the class wraps up. 

“I hate him.” Your molars grind bone-against-bone as you harshly press angry chords into the fretboard. “I hate him so so so so much.”

“Who are you talking about?” March 7th—in charge of the synthesiser—glances first at the bassist to your side, then back at you. Her eyes are wide in sympathy, yet it’s useless in the face of your despair. 

“Blade.” Poetically, the word is accompanied by the deep twang of Smoke on the Water as your fingers move mindlessly on your precious baby. What, your roommate?—she queries. No, a pet fish—Caelus responds, but you tune them both out. 

“He knew the professor would assign groups like that,” you groan. “That’s why he sat next to me.”

“He’s definitely trying to get you to leave his apartment out of your own will,” Dan Heng’s smooth cadence is somewhat soothing—and his conjecture is one you’ve come to yourself—but the accompanying baseline he’s playing to the song makes his theory sound comical. “But he won’t screw up his own project like that.”

You sigh, and the melody falls apart as you bring it to a grinding halt. 

“Believe me, I know just how much he values his projects.” Your head throbs upon thinking about that poor girl sobbing, and the bassist coughs to stifle a laugh. 

“What did he say that one time? ‘Your vapid idea would be better used on death row than as a functioning building’,” Stelle—the vocalist and also the only Psychology major you know who doesn’t unnervingly stare at you—imitates the deep reverberations of his voice, and you’re astonished at how it’s recalled verbatim (down to the exact adjective).

“I’m surprised it got round that far,” you suppress a smile—after all, it’ll be your head on the chopping block next. “You should’ve gone into theatre like Caelus did.” 

What a waste of talent, you shake your head mock-ruefully, which quickly turns to true woe as you realise just the predicament you’re in. 

✧ It’s not a complicated assignment. Well, it shouldn’t be: designing a sound structure based on the whims of the architectural class (whom you loathe); except that Blade is notorious for being a severe critic for civil engineering partnerships—like seriously, out of all hills to die on and it’s civil engineering. You begrudgingly create a new contact for him in your phone; a digital space just for him, which almost makes you throw up at the thought.

(+2 unread messages) <Dickhead> (new contact) 10:11 > library.  10:11 > east block, 20 minutes.

You stare incredulously at the chat, which is neither phrased as a question nor a request but an encrypted demand. The fuck? Infuriated, you take the break between your reps now rather than later, swilling down water while you irritably type out a reply. 

No can do. < 10:15 I’m busy. < 10:16

The reply comes less than a minute later; three dots animating themselves into existence while you wipe the sweat off your face with a towel. This prick. Well, it’s not so much a reply as an acknowledgement of your words—because he doesn’t reply, but rather your phone starts buzzing and you fumble while looking at the expletive lit up brightly on the screen. 

You’re sorely, sorely tempted to press the red receiver on the device. 

“What do you want?” you scowl, and you hope it translates through your voice that you’re revolted by his mere radio presence. 

“Where are you?” He ignores your question; voice vibrating low through your headphones, and you can’t help but shiver, just a little. Even through the thick towel, you can still feel crescents being formed in your palm from your nails—you sincerely wish you were throttling him instead. 

“None of your business.” 

There’s a budding migraine blossoming to life in your temple as you finally hang up. You think that’s the end of it—after all, it was literally yesterday that the groups were assigned. 

But when you shoulder the gym door open—skin still damp and warm from your shower, clean clothes sticking ever so slightly to laved skin—there’s a sleek car parked outside, and you frown when Blade opens the driver’s door. 

“I’m going to report you for stalking,” you grit out, pressing your body to the cool glass of the building. “How the fuck did you know where I was?”

“Kafka,” he replies simply, and of course, that crazy woman was the one who viewed your private story and sent it to him. “I’m picking you up.”

“No you’re not.” Seriously, he thinks you’re that easy to convince—

“I’ll shut the fuck up with the drums for these two weeks.” 

It’s almost miraculous how quickly you slide into the passenger seat. 

✧ You’ve never been in such close proximity to him before (if you don’t count that day in the kitchen). At least, voluntarily. When you close your eyes and lean back against the headrest, you can smell the faint, woody scent of his cologne. It’s different from the putrid tide of Axe the average engineering student drowns themself in—rather, it’s got the deep undertone of oud and something sweeter. You don’t expect it; maybe if he smelled like first impressions, he’d stink of blood and a dumpster fire.  ✧ Don’t fall asleep—he remarks, and you can feel his eyes on you briefly. Eyes on the road, prick—you retort, but your own lids are still tightly shut. Therefore, you don’t see how his gaze traces the remaining water droplets from your shower: how his hands linger on his gear stick so he can feel the emanating warmth from your damp thigh.  ✧ He freezes. Gross. He doesn’t like anyone, and only tolerates the rest of the Stellaron Hunters since they’ve seen him at his lowest and yet still find ways to bug him. And you. He wasn’t expecting you to last as long as you have. He certainly wasn’t expecting you to irritate him in your own way, and actually manage to aggravate him enough to force him into soundproofing his room. Actually, he still doesn’t know why you did that. He doesn’t know why his heart picked up slightly at the sight of you in that soaked shirt. And in the end, he still doesn’t entirely know why he chose to sit next to you for that lecture instead. It’s to annoy you, he decides. No point in deliberating too much about it.  ✧ It’s surprising that the two of you don’t immediately argue over the project; some eco-facility for sports that surprisingly was chosen unanimously by the pair of you. Eyes flitting to each other and back, it was a miracle you both had the same idea somehow. And it’s surprising when despite your lack of experience in civil engineering like this (you usually opt for mechanical on projects like these), you carefully consider the missing parts in his outlines—security cameras, sound systems, and tiny edits to the structure to really amplify the architecture.  ✧ He doesn’t mind your presence. That’s what shocks him. As you doze off with your head pressed into the crooks of your elbows, he doesn’t reprimand you like he would with anyone else. Instead, he places the material reference guide down and stops considering cement foundations. Before he gets the chance to poke your forehead, your phone buzzes against the table—lighting up with a name he didn’t think he’d see.  ✧ Dan Heng. He knows you’re friends with the guy, but there’s a burning sensation as his eyes watch the pop-up turn into another message, then another. What does he want? In real time, there’s a particular irritation that blossoms with each new notification. 

<Dan Heng> 20:19 > Are you still up? 20:19 > My roommate’s going to move in with his girlfriend, so you’ll be able to…

The message is cut off, but Blade isn’t stupid. He knows exactly what the implication suggests, and there’s a certain coolness in his eyes as he stares the message down. Isn’t this what he wanted? Yes, this is precisely the ending he hoped for: you moving out and him getting his space back to himself. 

But the issue stems from Dan Heng. He can’t have that. He can’t have you moving in with that man of all people. Anyone else would be fine, he insists to himself. 

Dan Heng. Dan Heng. Dan Heng. 

There’s a certain hypothesis he’d like to test. With your guard down like this, he snaps a photo of you with the drool leaking onto your sleeve—sending it directly to you. Just like clockwork, your phone lights up once more with a message. It’s not ‘Blade’ that’s texting you. 

<Dickhead> 20:20 > [photo.jpeg attached]

He grits his teeth, clutching his textbook until his fingers ache from the strain. No, he won’t give that bastard the satisfaction of taking his roommate like this. 

He’ll play nice. When you find someone who works this efficiently with you, while managing to hold their ground under his intimidating gaze, it’s hard not to want them to not scurry away. 

Eat shit, Dan Heng.

✧ Somehow, mercifully, you manage to complete the project with that weirdo. It’s strange—he’s surprisingly more cordial than ever. And with his inky hair pulled into a loose bun, glasses perched on his straight nose—it’s hard to imagine he’d ever made that poor girl cry in front of everyone like that, but you’d witnessed it yourself. So with a sigh, you remind yourself that he’s just as much of an asshole as the rumours say. But, staring at him so relaxed like this, these two different Blades are hard to ever merge.

“Something on my face?” He’s still writing with his glasses sliding down his nose. He sounds irritated, as per usual, but the tiny smirk painting his face lets you know that no he’s not irritated, he’s just being an arse just as always. 

“Yeah, pen,” you mutter, looking away as he finally glances up at you. When you glance back at the desk where your laptop precariously shows the still-unfinished presentation slides, he’s gazing up at you with an indecipherable look in his eyes. 

It almost puts to rest the image of a dickhead. 

“There’s no pen, though,” he purrs, voice low while he rests the manual back on the table. “I’ve been reading all morning.”

Nevermind—he’s as much of an asshole as he regularly is. 

“Who knows,” you comment offhandedly, slowly sliding a blue biro your way as soon as he looks back down. There—you attempt to inch forward to draw on his face, but he catches your wrist from across the table between you. 

You freeze. Shit, you screwed up. With how relaxed he is, it’s getting easier and easier to forget the rumours of his bruised knuckles that follow him like a shroud. His eyes glance coolly at you, then at the incriminating weapon within your fingers. 

“What are you doing?” Maybe he’s the questions first, beat up later kind. 

“Getting revenge.” Shameless, you think, but definitely not as shameless as getting told to effectively shut up with the drums yet having the audacity to keep going louder. 

His lips part, and your eyes nearly stray to the pink colour of them. Then, he smiles—something so cynical and disturbing you can’t help but shiver and twist your arm out of his hold, all so you can watch him askance. 

“I can see why people find you scary,” you shudder, tapping your biro on a square notepad. 

“And you don’t?” An innocuous question, but one that almost sounds accusatory. 

“Nah,” you make a disgusted noise, like you’re trying to suppress vomit. “You’re just a prick.”

In the end, that same prick ends up rolling his sleeves upon your request so you can litter blue ink upon his forearms. With how pale he is, it resembles delicate ceramics painted with cerulean landscapes. And while you do include etched illustrations and swirling designs, you make sure to include several phalluses dotted around—just so he lives up to his contact name. 

“Wow,” he remarks sardonically. “Maybe you should quit physics and join the liberal arts programme.”

You ignore him, taking a few shots of your handiwork and sending them to Kafka, captioned I feel like this truly reflects his personality and making sure all the tiny dicks are in full focus. 

“Maybe I should,” you shrug. “Then I wouldn’t have to deal with you, at least.”

“Likewise,” he responds, but it’s not as satisfying to think about you quitting as he thought it would be. 

It’s stupid. He finds that he doesn’t want the ink to wash from his arms, not so soon. 

When you log into your account to touch-up the presentation, you spot the comment he left back in the library on the presentation slides—timestamped to the exact twenty past five. 

17:20 > Maybe if you stopped staring at me, we’d be done sooner. 

It’s the longest sentence he’s ever typed out to you—but that’s exactly what makes it so galling. 

go fuck yourself < 22:31

22:31 > ooh you want me so bad aha

You pause, staring incredulously at the text, then to where the bathroom’s situated. The water’s definitely running.

… < 22:32 damn this idiot’s really getting scammed and hacked < 22:33 crazy < 22:33 [feynman’s twin] sent laughing emoji < 22:33

22:33 > on the daily lmao 22:34 > same two old man passwords for everything

Types like one too < 22:34

22:35 > right?? 22:36 > we should be friends btw 22:36 > [Blade.] sent contact silver-W

Dang he really put a period after than name too < 22:37

22:37 > top ten edgelords 22:37 > [Blade.] sent laughing emoji

[feynman’s twin] sent laughing emoji < 22:37

It’s not until the morning when he’s looking over the (surprisingly well-done) slides that he finally notices the string of (highly unprofessional) messages that he definitely did not write. 

His head throbs and his eye twitches as he reads through them—burning holes through the wall separating him and you. He hopes you receive the subliminal nightmares he’s so graciously sending you. 

It’s a fiercely deliberated decision. With a heavy heart, he finally presses [backspace] on the typo next to his nickname. 

He only hopes you won’t notice. 

(Silver Wolf notices—immediately screenshotting the new handle [Blade] and sending it to you.)

✧ Good things come in threes. Getting through this project, not getting beat up by that nerd, and getting through the presentation smoothly. By that, you mean you do most of the speaking while Blade clicks through the slides. However, contrary to all expectations, his voice comes low and rich—neither stumbling through the knowledge nor forgetting the important parts. It’s so shocking you can’t help but stare at him; something he definitely notices, judging by the self-important smirk he sends you.  ✧ Perhaps a little too good. The pair of you leave the lecture hall separately—after all, it’s not like you want to be in his presence any longer, and he doesn’t particularly want to be in yours either. But you do want the sweet energy drink that’s been chilling in the shared fridge for the past few days: as tantalising as the very nectar of the gods.  ✧ It’s when you enter an alleyway shortcut that you witness her—your old roommate. Vaguely, you recall she used to have a crush on Blade (a match made in heaven if there ever was one); perhaps that’s why she’s inching towards you with a pipe that is tetanus’ wet dream—so grimy you think you’ll immediately die if you’re struck by it.  ✧ All this over him?—you think with disgust as you try back out of the alleyway, only to collide with the towering body of her boyfriend: some guy unfortunate enough to be entrapped by her pretty face and definitely not her personality. She doesn’t want you, and he (aforementioned: Blade) doesn’t want her either. It’s rather tragic, but woefully you can’t spare any pity for them: not when you’re about to get beat and for what? A successful presentation with Blade?  ✧ They’re amateurish enough that you manage to evade them for a minute, but the alleyway’s too narrow to slip past them, and you’ve never been in a fight like this.  ✧ You’re cornered when he appears: some twisted knight he is.

“You’re late,” you heave, bruises on your knuckles and that man’s face. 

“You…” Blade trails off as he sees the blood spatters on your clothes, and his expression twists into one he’s glad you can’t see—not when his broad shoulders face you in an impenetrable wall. The two idiots—Tweedledee and Tweedledum, judging by how disturbingly gullible they are—stiffen immediately upon his timely arrival. 

He’ll handle it like he always does. 

But it’s certainly strange. Why does he feel so much angrier than he does normally?

✧ It’s late afternoon: dusk barely kissing the rooftops of the city, stars just about peeking from the violet firmament. You didn’t ask questions when he made enough space for you to slip out the alleyway: heart lodged in your throat as you quietly sat down at the local café with blossoming pain in your ribs and fists. Stupid, you were stupid to think that crazed girl would ever leave you alone.  ✧ Maybe it’s counterintuitive to feel safe when he steps into the small building. He smells faintly of blood: a terrible, metallic odour spilling onto his clothes and flesh. But beneath that, there’s a lingering scent of that woody oud—you can’t help but sink into it.  ✧ They won’t bother you ever again—he murmurs as the door jingles behind both of you. You didn’t kill them, did you?—you mutter back, half-sarcastically. No, but it probably hurt quite a bit for them—he shrugs. “Let’s go home.” ✧ Home. He says that, but there’s still that offer from Dan Heng to move in with him—one you’ll probably accept. Blade may have saved you, but he’s still a dickhead who has made numerous attempts to kick you out. 

“Ow, fuck,” you hiss as he dabs antiseptic on the various cuts on your hand. It’s well into the evening now, and you’re currently sitting on the bathroom counter with your injuries on full display. 

So infuriating. You glare at the man standing in between your legs—unscathed completely. Worst of all, there’s a smug smile on his lips; whatever worry he might have had over you has completely dissipated. 

“You couldn’t let them hit you once?”

“Bitter much?” he returns easily, swabbing another cotton ball with alcohol and pressing it against the large cut on the side of your forearm. It stings, but you grit your teeth and bear it—much too annoyed with him to show any more pain. 

In this position, the resentment you feel towards him turns faint; a veil seems to obscure the burning sensation. 

“You talk too much,” you seethe. “What happened to the prick who kept his mouth shut and ignored me?”

Tendrils of his jet-hued hair brush your cheek as he inches forward. “If you like, we can go right back to that—playing at my whim included.”

He hasn’t felt like this in years—back when he was still a boy named Yingxing and unmarred by the burdens life would eventually place on his shoulders. 

“Let me do it myself,” you argue back. 

“Nah.” Silver Wolf will pay for calling him an old man. “You won’t do it properly.” 

Another brief kiss from the alcohol against your bloody knuckles, and this time you can’t hide the slight wince on your face. It takes quite a lot of self-restraint to not dent the tweezers—he should’ve done so much worse to the two who tried this, besides beating the shit out of them and getting Kafka to land them behind bars. 

“That rod probably had tetanus on it,” he shrugs, rummaging around in his disused first-aid kit for plasters and bandages.

“Yeah, I thought that too,” you shudder. It's this moment of casual, same line thinking that strikes you as being far too strange. He's so close you can feel each puff of air when he exhales: practically scalding the bare skin stretched over collarbones. Too close—and if he keeps talking like this, as if he’s no longer disgusted by your presence, you won’t be able to deal with it. 

“What’d you do to her?” he questions, but it’s not the ‘no wonder she attacked you’ tone—rather than that, it’s like he’s trying to prompt you into distraction. 

“This is actually your fault,” you scowl, irritably casting your mind back to when she used to talk your ear off about the man standing here. 

“How so?” Nonplussed, he starts rolling the bandage across your arm—evidently, he’s experienced with this sort of thing. 

Stalker roommate. Stalker roommate has crush on engineering maniac. Stalker roommate sees that your new roommate and engineering maniac are one and the same—you summarise, too tired to give the specifics. He sees the way your lids flutter closed from exhaustion; for once, he’ll use Kafka to get more of the information you omitted. 

“Honestly, you two freaks would be perfect for each other,” you murmur absentmindedly. At that, he pulls the bandage tighter against your skin and you draw in a pained inhale. 

“You should try stand-up.” His voice is thick with revulsion, and it’s quiet for a few brief moments as he gets started on patching up the scrapes left on your back. You’re sitting on a stool now: unable to see his face but awfully mindful of how his hands brush over the skin layered over your scapula. 

“You still haven’t thanked me.”

“Thank you, my aggravating saviour,” you say, much too insincerely. “But that reminds me that I’ve got good news for you. That should suffice as a symbol of my gratitude.”

What is it?

“One of my friends has a room free, so I’ll probably be able to move out soon.”

The worst part is, he knows exactly who this friend is. His hands freeze on the band-aid he’s smoothing on your skin; too absorbed in his murderous thoughts to notice how you stiffen at the prolonged gesture. He’s not jealous; these are merely stirrings of friendship—this ugly, amorphous thing writhing in his gut and condemning him to senseless anger. 

“That’s not good news,” he breathes, and it’s a little too quiet as he finishes wrapping the final bandage around your bruised ribs. 

For the first time ever, Kafka receives a text from Blade that doesn’t consist of just one word. 

<Bladie> 20:33 > I need advice. 

Oh, this is interesting. 

What are friends for?—she coos, making sure to show Silver Wolf the glaring achievement in Blade’s range of text vocabulary. 

He’s clearly been on the rear end of bad news; while for her, on the contrary, this just means her scheme is moving along very nicely.  

[huggingtentacles]

Alright you just beat Elden Ring. Congratulations! You're now one of the cool folks who can actually beat the game, and you're not ready to put it down yet.

Maybe PvP intimidates you and you just wanna explore the world again. You may try a new build sure, but now that you know more about the game, you might wanna try something different, like a challenge run.

"huggingtentacles I am trash at the game there is no way I could do any of the cool runs, I died to Radagon a bazillion times"

Most people are good enough to beat a challange run. You can define what a challange is for yourself! There is no need to jump into something insane like a rune level 1 run or a torch only run. You can set any restriction you want, and completing the game with an additional challange is immensely more satisfying (and gives you bragging rights)

There are many different challange runs all varying in difficulty. Here are the runs that I've done personally.

Easy:

Region Lock Run — the premise is simple, you can't leave the region you are in unless you best the major boss(es) of that region. You can't go to Liurnia untill you beat Margit, you can't go to Altus untill you beat Rennala, etc. This run is fun because you can't skip over progression (like killing the Caelid dragon early with bleed to be overlevelled for Limgrave) which makes every fight feel appropriately difficult.

Starting Class Run — Only use the gear you start the game with. You can level up and upgrade your weapons and flask, but you can't use any other consumables and talismans you didn't start the game with. This run is quite flexible in difficulty because whether you choose to, say, use ashes of war or different spells or even golden seeds is ultimately up to you. All of them count.

No spirit summons — for some this is just the normal Elden Ring run, but for most it's a challange. While it can be somewhat difficult, not having spirit summons still leaves you with enough options to steamroll through the game if you need to. The challenge comes from actually learning the bosses and their patterns and engaging with combat more.

No status effects — As simple as it sounds. Perhaps you used to crutch on bleed, frost, rot or poison, now you can't. There are plenty of other very powerful damage options in the game, so the run is definitely not very hard, it only limits your arsenal somewhat.

Spells only/melee only — depending on what your previous run was. If you're used to standing behind and throwing pebbles, picking up a weapon might be a fun new challenge. And if you are used to your Big Sword, it's gonna be kinda hard to adjust to managing your FP and putting together a build.

Medium:

Spirit Summons Only — moderately difficult because it requires rather extensive knowledge of the game's mechanics. The basic premise is that you can only deal damage using spirit summons. You can restrict it to bosses only or to the whole run in general. It's an absolutely hilarious run. The AI built into the game can beat the entire game for you. Including the hardest endgame bosses like Malenia. Also playing as a support, healing and buffing your summons is really fun :)

No Crimson Flask — LISTEN. I swear it's not that hard. Yes it sucks a bit in the early game, but there are so many tools and options available to completely replace your flask with regen and heal spells. Just level up your vigor. This run is incredibly fun and it's good if you are aiming for harder runs in the future but aren't sure if you have it in you. I know you do ;)

Taunter's Tongue Run — Definitely my FAVOURITE of all of them. Its incredibly simple: you get Taunter's Tongue as soon as you get access to Roundtable Hold and you turn it on forever. Fight invaders alone or with a friend in 2v2s. If you don't have any PvP experience, this is one of the ways to learn. By the end of it, you won't be half bad at PvP, trust me (unless you just run away all the time which is also an option)

Hard:

Rune Level 1 is such a difficult run to do, but the cultural legacy of Fromsoft "no leveling up" runs makes the completion of it so desirable. Completing this run basically makes you part of the small section of people who actually know how to fight every single boss without relying on cheap tactics and cheese. You learn how to counter every move most enemies make because of how unforgiving it is.

But what's more fun is the sheer variety. Stat boosting gear is so common in this game you can literally use almost anything you want as a weapon.

Permadeath — If you die, you restart. Use any tools at your disposal to survive, play it safe, level up your vigor. But most importantly, brace for setbacks. Restarting because of a dumb mistake sucks, but that's why it's such an impressive run to complete. If you can take a loss on Elden Beast and make it to the inside of the Erdtree again, you will achieve one of the hardest challanges ER has to offer.

An easier variation of Permadeath would be "no rune loss" run. There are tools the game gives you to avoid losing runes, but it's still a very difficult run.

Torch Only Run — You pick up a standard torch from Church of Elleh and you use it to Kill God.

An easier variation would be Torches Only run which allows you to use the entire arsenal of torches. Still a very difficult run that requires a lot of skill to beat.

Impossible:

No Thinking About Kissing Malenia run — still working on this one. Can't figure it out. If you have advice please DM me

Feel free to add more challange run ideas!

[communistkenobi]

would you be at all willing to talk about your experience of undergrad vs grad school? personally i struggled quite a bit in undergrad but am still always tempted to go back, and i think maybe the narrowed focus of grad school would be a little easier to handle, but i'm not sure if that would actually be the case... & perhaps your experience was something else completely and maybe this is too vague also lol, but i'm very curious about how you felt they were different!

yeah totally! My experience is doing graduate degrees (writing a thesis) in the faculty of social science in Canadian universities, so everything I’m about to say comes from that specific context. Definitely not universal lol

in my experience grad school is a lot more customised than undergrad. You still have required courses, non-course degree milestones (usually you’re required to present your work at conferences, which can get expensive and isn’t always covered by your department, as well as produce summaries of work you’ve done, research proposals, scholarship applications, etc), and standardised expectations, but you have a lot more choice in the courses you take and what topics you focus on. One university I was at was very relaxed about deadlines in grad school (I easily got extensions from profs without needing doctors notes or official accommodations, i was given the ability to redo assignments, etc), and the other was the ecact opposite (treated me like a idiot for needing extra time with work). If you’re doing a thesis project, a lot of your degree is independent work that you do in your own time - this was a huge struggle for me at the end of my masters, and I had to do “martial law” with my graduate friends at the very end, which basically meant us instituting a highly regimented schedule together made up of work sessions and breaks where we would each meet up and work on finishing our thesis (1 hour of work then 15 min break, rince and repeat, do this for four or five sessions a day every day). You are on a time crunch as you only receive funding for so many years, if you get offered funding at all.

your supervisor has a lot of control and influence over you - they are meant to guide you through the research process, develop your project, give you feedback, provide you with appropriate literature, double check your work, and help you get grants / funding. If you get a bad one it can legitimately ruin your life. I have had hilariously bad luck with supervisors (I’ve had to switch supervisors twice due to discrimination and breaches of provincial human rights law - which is not the norm to my understanding lol).

it depends on why you want to go to grad school and what you plan to do after. I want to stay in academia so that’s where most of my advice comes from. Tenure-track positions are incredibly difficult to secure and if you’re serious about staying in the academy you should be publishing your research while you’re still in graduate school, and treat every term paper as a draft of something you’re going to publish. I also have backup jobs I know I can apply for outside of academia if I don’t get any academic offers.

it’s relatively common for students to join a two or four year grad program but take way more time than that to finish. Usually if you get any funding packages, they only cover the official allotted years (in my experience, two for a master’s, four for PhD), meaning that if you need extra time, you could be finishing your degree with no funding and no guaranteed employment. If your supervisor is cool/connected they might have money they can swing your way, but it’s a tenuous and scary way to live if you have no other source of income.

funding usually comes from 1) grants your department gives you (they will tell you if they’re giving you money on your acceptance letter), 2) teaching assistant positions (I was/am required to be a TA, which usually involves grading undergraduate work, running labs, or leading teaching sessions/“tutorials”) and 3) federal scholarships that you are required to apply for. You need to write applications for these scholarships, usually including a research proposal, a CV/resume, a transcript of your grades, and recently, they’ve added a requirement for a diversity statement explaining any minority statuses you have and how that affects your education. TA work has an uneven workload from week to week, and usually most of the work is towards the end of the term when you’re grading final essays/exams, which creates crunch periods where you’re both working on your own coursework and grading undergrad work.

again a lot of this might not apply to your particular discipline or university or country. Usually universities list a lot of this info on their website, which can help you figure out what’s required of you. Grad school is structured like a full time job and it doesn’t pay very well even if you are funded. I lived with my parents for most of my master’s which gave me the financial stability to complete it. It’s not easy and it takes up most of your waking time, and it can leave you in a financially precarious position with a lot of debt. It’s definitely not something I would recommend for fun unless you have a lot of money and time to burn

[utilitycaster]

who out here sieging they weisshaupt

anyway. I understand wardens by definition go to horrible blighted places BUT every warden location SUCKS ASS. Let's do the rundown. A lot has happened.

Siege of Weisshaupt! I took Emmrich with me (Davrin is required and also makes sense) and while, again, I'm on Dumbass mode for combat, I must admit it kinda sucks that two of my healers AND rook are all most lethal with necrotic damage and darkspawn are resistant. this was perhaps a bad idea. I lived though, and I punched the warden and everyone except the academics approved, which is hilarious. Sorry Emmrich and Bellara I am NOT using my words. Also Bellara you'd feel better if you punched someone. Also bringing Emmrich IS pretty funny both because he is a very good healer/buffer and as Davrin and I are both tanks and damage dealers and my physical damage is nothing to sneeze at it's fine; and because Davrin is like IT IS MY DESTINY TO DIE IN GLORY AND DUTY and Emmrich is like the thought of dying makes me sick to my stomach and I am a necromancer.

I'll admit the sad failure family dinner and the solas convo after AND Varric all were like BY THE WAY YOU SHOULD DO COMPANION QUESTS and it was a little clunky BUT some people are stupid and I appreciate the game makes it obvious to them. also, talking to Lucanis, Davrin, and Neve was very fun for me (tragedy enjoyer). I now see why you talk with Davrin so much; he changes drastically after Weisshaupt and becomes much more interesting and you need to have that baseline.

I am slowly regaining Neve's trust! Also Neve being terrible at making coffee and Lucanis flirting with her in the form of "oh my god your coffee is the worst thing ever let me make you some" is a fucking. main quest interaction. Then I took Lucanis to Dock Town for the mission while Davrin dealt with his justified depressive episode.

The scene where Spite possesses Lucanis is missable if you don't check, and that's an oversight on Bioware's part, I must admit. Also I NEVER take the comedy mask option but I had to for the "you can't caffeinate your way out of this line" even though I as a real life person drink a quart of jet-fuel level coffee a day. Once a vending machine gave me three Celsius Essentials for the price of one and I briefly considered finding out what would happen if I drank all of them, and I'd already had coffee that day. Point being Lucanis's inclinations are relatable.

I'm back on that sweet sidequest life before The Cauldron quest, particularly the companion quests. There's like 3in Arlathan I haven't even picked up and of course I must go back to the wetlands my beloathed to see Evka (one of two good things in the wetlands, the other being Antoine). I DID do Bellara's companion quest. I love how the part 2 companion quests are like your friends are GOING THROUGH IT. Again. not subtle. but I do love justified angst. Neve literally the only person who isn't in a deep depression or anxiety spiral right now. I'm even playing Rook as feeling bad enough to admit weakness to Solas. Oh anyway Bellara's quest is great. Matt Mercer is there again, in a performance that made me go "wait is that Matt Mercer?" His delivery is incredible. Obsessed with how everyone was like MATT MERCER IS IN THIS GAME. HE'S A HISSING SKELETON. and actually he's playing two major characters.

I'll make a separate post later about this specifically, but I love the crossroads and could spend all my time there, which is why I've already fought Mythal I guess. I HAVE learned some of my lesson re: sidequesting aggressively though, and I am saving the necropolis dragon for when I'm "not only level thirty...four?" and "am better at this".

Again, my tolerance for clunky-ass dialogue in fantasy is high BUT. This game uses the word "fucking" so why do they keep saying "butt" instead of "ass." It tracks for Davrin, who is a dork, but I'm sorry and not to self insert excessively but Rook would say the word "ass" in front of Mila. there is a fucking archdemon. let the child learn the cuss words.

GOT A BLACK EMPORIUM INVITE BABEYYYYYYYYYYYYY time to FINISH MY GIFT GIVING

[lets-try-some-writing]

Had this really cute idea about TFP kids having pets of some kind if they ever do get a chance wanna know what you think!

Jack--- a pigeon- because they're great companions for people who has anxiety or feel lonely ( he probably has the one with small beak and feather covered legs and definitely a female because they're more loving and affectionate and puts her in cute clothes)

Miko--- a bearded dragon (or maybe even a gecko but definitely some lizard animal)- they're puppies with scales very energetic, weird and has fun personality and moves their head to music ( definitely dress it up and named it after a slash monkey member)

Raf--- a guinea pig or a rat (but I lean on rat more) - they're very social animals and love their owners very much and very intelligent ( he definitely has two because they has to have a friend. And he always let them climb on him or hides them in his pockets or bag and takes them with him)

And I like to imagine them explaining to the bots that they're not pets but companions/family or even their own children and how much they mean to them or how much of an emotional support they were to them!

And definitely found an excuse/reason to bring them to base!

And the bots reaction are like:

Ratchet wants them immediately out the base but get gaslighted into letting them stay for a day one the condition that they stay away from his work place ( Miko doesn't comply)

Optimus would be curious about them since he haven't seen them so close and would want to learn more about them and how they behave completely different and seems to understand their owners

Arcee might be more neutral about them saying if the kids are happy then that's it but surely gets interested in seeing how they act and the tricks they do

Bulkhead wouldn't want to be near them because he fears they get in his joints like some scraplets (Ratchet used that to keep him away from his stuff)

Wheeljack( I'm not too sure about him) but would want to see what they're capable of and tries to teach them bad tricks to maybe piss of a certain CMO

Bumblebee/Smokescreen would undoubtedly be amazed at these different animals and be even more impressed by the tricks hey do to the point they'd want one but gets shut down quickly by the whole team because they're too much work

Ultra magnus would just leave simple comment about them and leaves

What's your opinion? Maybe different animals? But these fits them well!

What do I think? Well, since I am unsure if this is a writing request or not, I will give my opinion on what you have presented here. Please feel free to send in another request if you were hoping for writing. I tend to misunderstand things like this more often than not.

Now firstly, this is an adorable idea and I do in fact think the animals fit. I doubt they would have any exotic pets, except perhaps Miko who I could imagine having some sort of parrot due to the intelligence of the species. Aside from that, spot on thinking regarding the animals that would be involved.

Ratchet's reaction is comedy gold I must say. Optimus's makes perfect sense considering his personality, although I also imagine he wouldn't be too fond of the mess or the pets getting into equipment. Arcee's reaction is also pretty solid, however I can see her developing a strange rivalry with Jack's pigeon or Rafael's rodent upon having to assist in collecting the small thing from either the rafters or under work stations. Bulkhead's response is perfect, no commentary there except for that I think it would be hilarious for him to fear Rafael's hamster above all else. I've dealt with hamsters, those little critters can RUN-

For Wheeljack I would alter his reaction only slightly to have him find it funny to watch the pets fail at whatever it is they are attempting. Him staring at the hamster and laughing hysterically when it runs into an object or the pigeon when it inevitably crashes sounds on point for him. You got Smokey and Bee also perfectly on point in my opinion. That sounds about right for them, although Bee I think would be less inclined to get one and more silently encouraging Smokescreen since if Smokey could convince the team to let them have a pet, then great, but I doubt he would want to deal with the glares personally. Ha, yeah Ultra Magnus wouldn't give a crap unless one of the animals touched his stuff. Then I bet he would have WORDS with whoever owned the animal in question.

In conclusion, a very humorous concept indeed.

[brynn-lear]

Dear Brynlee,

I hope my letter finds you in good health. I appreciate your swift and kind response. I'm quite relieved you do not mind my ignorance at times.

Moving on, I'm quite glad to hear your fondness for both the architect and the Duke. I favour the architect a lot, agreeing that he does put other artists at peace with his reliable nature. His way of communication is certainly one I nod at with great appreciation, and his sentimental disposition easily captures my curiosity.

As for the Duke though, my gaze of favour does not have any particular cause; it is simply that Monsieur Neuvillette an I happen to be close associates, and a friend of a friend certainly deserves my favour.

Of course, though, much like you, even I retain my appreciation for them away from romance. I simply adore them, is all.

Lord Kamisato is a curious one indeed... in spite of his status, it's safe to say that I consider myself quite fortunate to never have had the privilege bad luck to have a chance at interacting with him.

The Bough keeper is a more fascinating character though; I have never exactly been able to pin down his personality in spite of having had multiple chances to speak to him, in all of whom he has been nothing short of poised, respectful, and brilliant.

I believe he drapes on himself the title of a mourner, shading all other of his brighter qualities with its dull colour. He is illusive, but quietly so, never entirely being honest, or a liar; masterfully treading the lines that separate all that is good and evil.

Who dares to observe the observer? I do, of course. I await the day he shows his true nature; perhaps eagerly so.

I would share my enthusiasm for Sir Dmitri as well, should I have known him better; but considering that you adore him so, I believe he must be a good man. He certainly deserves my curiosity, then.

May I ask yet another question? Who do you adore from yet another parallel universe where the star of Stelle/Caelus finds home?

I hope my letters do not disturb you.

Yours Truly,

Chryseis Valois.

Dearest Chryseis,

You have no idea how much happy I was to receive another letter from you. I agree with most of your points, and I can definitely understand your relationship with the Iudex.

You better thank the God you believe in that you've never encountered Lord Kamisato. The Kamisato Commissioner is the elusive type. Perhaps one day you would encounter him. Who knows? Well, perhaps I do. I am an overseer after all.

I think I have a grasp on the former Black Serpent Knight's personality. He is someone I have the privilege of working with as of late, alongside Black Swan and "Medjed". Dainsleif may seem hard to understand upon first meeting, but the subtleties in his speech and humor shines the mote you interact. Though, considering that you are one of our guests, perhaps limited interacts is better. You know well that he asks the most mind boggling questions.

Interest in His Majesty...? Oh, no, you must've misunderstood our relationship. If you saw me inquiring women and men alike about their opinions of our King— it's an act done for my duties rather than... Whatever romantic airs people will label them as. I'm just helping a friend find someone to love him. That's all. Really. Please, believe me. Please.

As for the that other realm... Hmm. Well, Dr. Ratio and Aventurine are very similar to the Professor Veritas and Kakavasha I know— so it's no secret I'm fond of them. Though we'd never met, I think I would get along with Captain Gepard of the Silvermane Guards just fine. Jing Yuan is very hospitable, Kafka is charmingly persuasive, Sparkle is easy to befriend, and Blade is... Something. Hilarious how I found him most difficult to describe when he is my closest friend from that realm. His circumstances are unique, and I suppose I can relate to his... "tendencies".

Well, how about you? Who do you favor from that realm? I don't suppose Mister Aventurine is also in that list? Most people I know are quite obsessed with him. Do tell me your opinion. I'd love to know!

Sincerely,

- Brynlee <3

[true-blue-sonic]

7-12-16-23 for Silver, Espio and Blaze? (that’s twelve questions I am so sorry)

No worries, I am currently ill at home and have gathered enough energy to tackle it ^-^

Silver:

7. What's something the fandom does when it comes to this character that you like?

Oh dear.😅 Oof, let's see here... I think that for a side character in a large extended cast, Silver is actually quite popular, and people are warming up to him more and more. At least, in polls that feature him and such he always seems to do quite well? And he's also got a lot of fanart and attention dedicated to him! So that is something that I like: the fact that he's generally well-liked. It's definitely a step up from 2006!

12. What's a headcanon you have for this character?

My very epic headcanon was that he is left-handed, but I seem to have disproven that myself, haha. Another one I have is that with every new season that rolls around, he claims it is his favourite: winter for the snow and cozy times, spring for the new life and pretty flowers, summer for the warm temperatures and long sunny days, and autumns for its colours and epic storms. He just can't make up his mind which one he likes best: he loves it all similarly.

16. What's your least favorite ship for this character?

I don't think I have one; there are many that I am not interested in, but those don't show up so much anyway and I don't have anything about them that I hate, so I just ignore them.

23. Favorite picture of this character?

I can't just pick one, come on!!

I'll take this one because I love the pastel-like colouring, but rest assured I like many more!

Espio:

7. What's something the fandom does when it comes to this character that you like?

I think people overall have a relatively good grasp on his "place" within the Chaotix: the "straight man" of the team who similarly still is equally silly as the others. I always like seeing that: it's funny because Espio treats it so seriously, haha.

12. What's a headcanon you have for this character?

He can be a bit of a mother hen, being the person most concerned with their finances, ensuring they have enough food, and raising Charmy into a responsible adult. Vector is the face of the Chaotix and the one Espio and Charmy follow, but behind the scenes Espio is the one who helps make sure everything runs smoothly and they're all cared for as best they can.

16. What's your least favorite ship for this character?

Same for Silver: none. It probably helps that I just concern myself most with Espilver and I don't do too much outside that, haha.

23. Favorite picture of this character?

Also here picking one is difficult😅

I'll go with this one because I think it very nicely shows the Chaotix household, and I also like seeing Espio write with a brush.

Blaze:

7. What's something the fandom does when it comes to this character that you like?

Hmm, I'm trying to think of something, but I don't engage so much with fan content about Blaze, to be quite honest. Though, people who like the Rush series and those who know of and appreciate how hilariously broken Blaze is in those games compared to Sonic when it comes to her jumping ability are always nice to see!

12. What's a headcanon you have for this character?

The reason she's so bad at cooking is because of her impatience: she can control the fire she uses to cook well, it's just that she deliberately makes them go too hard/quickly in order to be finished more quickly. But that usually just means things get burned instead. If she's got someone to help her out and distract her in the kitchen, it'll come out much better.

16. What's your least favorite ship for this character?

Also none ^-^

23. Favorite picture of this character?

This might perhaps be odd, but I adore some of her sprites from Rush!

I think they masterfully managed to capture Blaze's growth from closed-off and grumpy person who isolated herself her whole life into someone who knows that she can rely on others, and who appreciates her new friends. She's just so cute when she smiles! I love how Cream in Rush even deliberately draws attention to it. And the memories I have of the story around them makes seeing the sprites all the sweeter!

[bookish-monster]

RECOMMENDATION

Love, Laugh, Lich

by Kate Prior - find her on Twitter, Instagram, and TikTok as well

The storygraph link contains info such as publication date, number of pages, community-created content warnings, and more.

Love, Laugh, Lich is the first installment of the Claws and Cubicles series, and it completely stole my reliquary—I mean, heart. First of all, the situation is absolutely hilarious: a lich takes over the realm, instituting an Evil Dominion o’er all, and yet… people still go to work! There are office jobs! Lily, the human protagonist and the lich’s personal assistant, complains about a lack of PTO and shitty severance packages alongside the virgin sacrifices that the Lich Lord demands! It’s wild and utterly ridiculous and I truly enjoyed every moment of the sheer incongruity of it all. Look at this quote:

[The lich is] pacing the lower inner level of the Sanctum, the ritual floor. It’s drawn up in runes and incantation circles, with all his most-used ingredients lined up near the edges, and an altar for sacrifices in the center. "And there’s the initiative to bring more women in the STEM fields. That’s Sneakiness, Traumatization, Evil Studies, and Misfortune," I trail off...

It’s so corny and silly that I can’t help but love it. It feels like corporate D&D with the absurdity of the setting, almost, but with an office romance twist. This is one of those books where I learned almost nothing about the FMC outside of her interactions with the love interest, but I was weirdly okay with it because the setup was so outlandish and fun. Anyway, I truly did enjoy Lily as a protagonist. Usually I don’t jive much with first person POV, but I liked Lily’s. She is, of course, rather disconnected from reality and potentially crazy—it’s not wanting to jump a lich’s bones (ha) that makes me say so, but the fact that she has a continent-sized crush on her boss and agrees to sleep with him for work. FOR WORK! Girl…

Janice, Lily’s best friend and the company’s HR manager, is the voice of reason here (and potentially the FMC of the next installment of this series) but she is sadly—or perhaps happily?—ignored by Lily in favor of Soven (the lich) and his trifecta of cocks. You heard me right: trifecta. Soven has three dicks (one of them dedicated to clitoral stimulation) and he isn’t afraid to use them. Lily is a big fan, as am I. Soven is also a bit of a dork, which is super endearing given that he has enough undead magical power to (probably) level a city block without breaking a sweat.

I actually liked the conflict in this little novella. You can read the entire story in a few hours, but it feels appropriately sized—not too grand, but also not cramped. The story was (to quote Goldilocks) just right for what it was trying to do. The fact that sleeping with one’s boss is generally considered a bad idea all around, even in the real world, was acknowledged heartily—Lily agonizes over her feelings and Soven’s feelings and what the boundary is between “work” and “a relationship” and honestly it’s a whole mess of emotions that ordinarily I would find tedious… but because the novella is so short, the miscommunication and pining and angst didn’t get drawn out even close to the border of my patience, and I had a great time. 

The ending is very cute and a definite HEA that I found very sweet without being cavity-inducing in its intensity. The sex scenes were fun and varied, and as someone who prefers more lavish, drawn-out sex scenes I was reasonably satiated with these. Overall, Love, Laugh, Lich was a great, funny rom-com, and I’m looking forward to picking up the next book in the series as soon as my next paycheck comes in.

Buy this book on Amazon Kindle (US)

[dans-den]

Guardians of the Galaxy Vol. 3 Review

Hey what's what going on everyone?! Dan here and today I'll be reviewing Guardians of the Galaxy Vol. 3!

Now this is the last MCU movie directed by James Gunn and people were curious wondering how this movie would do since lately the MCU movies and shows have been...lackluster to say the least. I'm also told this was the first MCU movie to drop the F bomb which upset numerous parents but then again they should have known that a PG-13 movie is not suitable for kids. Then again, these are the same parents who buy M rated games for their 10 year old kids. Now with those tangents out of the way, lets dive into the movie review.

Spoilers Warning: it has been a week since it's been out but I'll still give warnings

The plot is one last ride for the OG Guardians, however you once again won't fully understand unless you watch the other two Guardian movies, along with Infinity War and Endgame. Besides that oversight, the plot itself was great, there was personal stakes to save Rockets life after he was severely injured and the Guardians will have to face a being with a god superiority complex and a warlock named Adam. At first the movie was kinda fast with the plot but as the movie progressed it flowed better. Now people have been critical about the MCU formula where the characters are all quirky or "funny" and honestly it is annoying. However, the Guardians were the true quirky characters of the MCU, they popularized that formula and they have been the ones to make it work. Characters like Thor or Captain America can't be quirky the same way since they were established to be honorable and morally grounded characters whereas the Guardians have always been the Misfits of the MCU. This formula works best for them and that's why I didn't mind the quirkiness here because it works for the Guardians, it's hilarious especially for characters like Drax.

My favorite and I think everyone's favorite in this film was the backstory of Rocket Racoon. If you've been paying attention to the Guardians and other MCU films he's been in, you'll notice he has been the main focus for the Guardians team. His story was hinted in the first Guardians movie and from then on his story has been subtly been revealing itself each installment and his character growth has been subtly developing just as much. This movie has amped it up by revealing his backstory and including his former love interest Lylla Otter and his tragic loss of her along with his other friends. I'm glad we finally got to see his backstory and it explains plenty about him that we already had a feeling about but this film confirmed it all and it was emotional and hard to watch with the animal cruelty moments. They did Rocket justice here and I'm happy.

I will say the weakness part of this film is definitely Adam Warlock. I remember when they revealed him at the post credit scene in Vol. 2 and was hyped AF! If you've read the comics, you'll see Adam did play a role against Thanos and had the Infinity Gauntlet ready at his side. I was speculating he was being saved for Infinity War but unfortunately he never came to be and that was a let down. So I figured he would show up in Vol. 3 and he did but he had no real purpose in this film. He was just there to further the plot and wasn't necessary. We thought he would be the main bad guy here but no he was just a henchmen to some other bad guy (who I enjoyed since he was just unapologetically evil and that's refreshing to see). He had only one real moment and that was towards the end saving one of the Guardians from dying (even though he almost killed one to begin with). Adam warlock was disappointing in this film but hopefully we'll get a better story with him in the future or perhaps a mini series involving him on Disney plus.

Now I did watch the post credit scenes and to be honest they're nothing special and I am just gonna leave it at that. The first one is basically an epilogue to the film and callback to Vol. 1 music while the other scene is just a little callback to the recent Christmas special, nothing you need to stay after the movie for where you can just look them up on YouTube. This is why post credit scenes aren't really worth staying for anymore at least to me, they're not like before where they connect and amount to anything major in the future.

Overall, Vol. 3 was a great sendoff for James Gunn in the MCU and it is clear he wanted this to be his swansong before his departure. He pulled out all the stops here and were grateful for it. I feel this is definitely one of the better MCU movies in recent years next to Spiderman: No Way Home and Doctor Strange in the Multiverse of Madness. I doubt we'll get great quality like this in the MCU for a while but I'm glad we have this.

Rating this film I am giving it:

9/10

This was a fun time and emotional roller coaster thinking this could have been the last we see of any of these guys and James Gunn gave us a truly lovely sendoff from the MCU. I highly recommend watching this film and that is about it.

See ya!

[fantomette22]

Ok every time I start to write your name, I almost type “Fanta” which I find hilarious. It’d be a cute nickname!

(Cherry best flavor)

ANYWAY. Back on track. I am curious if you have any head-canons for Annalise and her role to play in the story? What is her character like to you? I am very curious 😈

Never thought some would compared my nickname as a soda xD (a YouTuber I used to follow is named like that too)

But anyway, Annalise ! I don't have too much too (because you know my brain is way much concentrated on always the same stuff but here's the few ideas/headcanons I got :)

I already talk about it, but for me this, is a younger Annalise.

So what she's like hm ? (I'm not sure XD) I mean if we look at the source materials she can be a bit mean if you don't do what she wants x) she sure have a LOT of pride. It's understandable she's the queen ✨ after all. But she's one of the few npc who don't want to hurt us too (that's kind of an accomplishment in Bloodborne & soulsborne games) & if we behave accordingly she can be quite sympathetic towards us.

But she's definitely not innocent and probably have bloods on her hands (less than a lot of people but still) I feel she might have order really dark things to get blood dregs and have the church against her But still... she lost so much too... I really feel bad for her... And I think she's kinda in denial... like how can you not go completely crazy after what happened ?!

But perhaps in her youth it was more different. Still with a big ego but perhaps quite caring too, who wants the best for Cainhurst, her family and all. Pretty sure she was quite good in politics, reasoned and have a really good prestance. And you know all the things a XIX century princess was supposed to do/know I guess. I mean ok everything she wears is a bit outdated. But like everyone seems to wear 1700s clothes in this damn castle. Oh and pretty sure she had good relationship with Byrgen, the church, Laurence, the hunters too maybe help them with their own expeditions too ! Maybe Logarius too. Before everything went down at least...

---

I think she used to have a good relationship with Maria ? Even if they didn't agree all the times she understood that Maria couldn't just be locked in Cainhurst and that another way of life fit her better. And Even if she was originally supposed to become one of her personal bodyguards/royal guards ("a shadow" of the queen like I call them hehe). Also, she always have an excuse and wise words for Maria rebellious teenage years x) And yeah they're cousins or smt similar in my main interprets and basically grow up together even if Annalise is a few years older.

I need to mention my oc Vledemyr too (still not sure of the orthograph help) basically Maria's cousin? almost the same age as Anna/bit older who became her bodyguard, then the chief of the royal guards later. Her closet friends and he's always been quite overprotective of the 2. Like an older brother to Maria and really want the best for /protect Annalise. He's really dedicated. (He's the mvp too).

Her mother died when she was young (but like not too young? between childhood/pre teens ?? yeah lot of people dies...) so not always easy. She likes her father too but you know he kinda let things just pass and happened too...and being really active.

Need to talk a bit about her husband too, but not too much it's not the subject (I mean... should i finally share his name and what he did to be king?! I don't remember if I already share... (I love this smart idiot so much, she do too). Yeah she actually really care about him. She knows he wants even more to restore Cainhurst power (for the honor of cainhurst blabla), he went to the chalices to find lot of things (statues, the ring...) and is doing a lot for her that she acknowledge. And to finishes with the relationships. I need to mention of course the bloody crow of Cainhurst ! I hesitated for a while but it's not Vledemyr...BUT there's a link somewhere.

But first, when she became "immortal" ( like the great one I guess? you live really long, don't really decomposed and your soul can't die but your body can die/be destroyed??) so yeah cool, as such she wasn't really stressed out to have an heir at the beginning. (And she got relatives that could take after her just in case but there's one relatives she know wouldn't want that to happened at all...) but still I feel she really wanted to eventually have one, and in their own way ascend like the pthumerians wanted to do. + have a family kinda. I guess the child of the immortal queen would be quite powerful and such an event don't you think ?

But... It didn't work... I mean she either have huge difficulties to fall pregnant / or don't manage to have a pregnancy going to term... either because of natural physiology or maybe the forbidden blood itself... king fell awful about it... she blames herself, he blames himself... that's why I think it took a few decades to have the child of blood with all blood dregs and all ! (sure took lot of times and researches) (ultimately it didn't work too but it could have if well you know... 😔) ((yeah love drama and sad stuff T_T that's maybe a bit dark too I'm really sorry...)

So in the meantime to compensated, she passed a lot of time with well... baby Crow ! (that I call Voron if I remember. I let you guess what it means. And literally everyone was crazy with him when he was a baby. Some much hc about him now thanks to you Crow!!!) Who's actually the son of a close relative (no telling yet hehe). She even made him some kind of heir of Cainhurst until she get could got hers, in case smt. happened. (Crow is a prince and rightful heir to Cainhurst hello ?! wouldn't that be cool?!)

---

And when you ask me about her role ? Like in the stories in my head XD ? Well it's not a really big role at the beginning . Until her father (the former king) died and she became queen. Cainhurst was becoming really dusty she wanted to make things moves, make Cainhurst strong again, and the church/byrgenwerth? needed help with the chalices + researches and blood were a good deal. And then they found the forbidden blood... but didn't wanted to gives to much info to Cainhurst to soon... even if that was their rightful inheritance ! So you know one of the scholar leaks some info to the Queen... then stole it and bring it back kof kof 👀 (not telling too much bc it's not the subject but this guy I swear I have a few ideas XD guess what the guy become after lol)

Then things don't move too much but slowly behind the scenes. Cainhurst get in too much with their lost Pthumerians irritate, goes into chalices dungeons, bring back some stuff... but then at some points their views clash with the healing church + maybe begin to kills hunters for blood dregs. At the beginning it's just mad people but maybe at some points it's not anymore so... and then you know they try to have the child of blood but the executioners show up...

Hope it answers you're question ! If you want smt for specific about some subject in particular let me know ! :)

[londonfoginacup]

I was tagged by @ladyaj-13!

Rules: List ten books that have stayed with you in some way, don’t take but a few minutes, and don’t think too hard - they don’t have to be the “right” or “great” works, just the ones that have touched you.

The Dalemark Quartet by Diana Wynne Jones

This is technically four books together, but the copy I got was a library bound copy that my mom picked up at the university book sale when I was in 6th grade. It took me three years to read the whole thing because I was so annoyed that each book would end on a cliffhanger and then start with another whole cast of characters. But truly my favourite fantasy book, and my favourite author of all time

2. How to Hide and Empire by Daniel Immerwahl

One of my fav nonfiction books of all time, full of fascinating trivia and connections that all of my friends inwardly roll their eyes at me for repeating in nearly every conversation

3. Catch-22 by Joseph Heller

I had to read this for class in high school and I definitely was the only person who found it fucking hilarious. Nobody else that I talk to ever likes this book. Also I lent my copy full of pages and pages of notes to somebody and now it's LOST

4. Love You Bye by Scott Mills

Scott Mills the platonic love of my life. This is such an easy read and so clearly heavily ghost written but I love it so much because I am maybe perhaps Scott's number one fan.

5. Gideon the Ninth by Tamsyn Muir

I read this last year and it's the first fiction book I have read in... maybe three years? I'm obsessed. I find fiction to be very boring right now but this series is DIFFERENT.

6. Love Thy Body by Nancy Pearcey

The rules said books that have "stayed with you in some way". There's no book that has made me more viscerally angry to read than this one. I hated it. She drew the most outlandish conclusions and made ridiculous leaps. 0/10 the only worse book is probably the one she just published.

7. Death to Deconstruction by Joshua Porter

A theology book that doesn't suck. My roommate bought this for me for Christmas and she got it SIGNED (Joshua Porter aka Josh Dies aka the lead singer of Showbread and the band I stanned before 1D). I read this over a series of weeks at Ikea over swedish meatballs.

8. Catch and Kill by Ronan Farrow

I keep saying that if there's one book I'd rec to Louis it would be this one. Goddamn Ronan is a good writer and it's so good to watch bad men go down.

9. The Black Tattoo by Sam Enthoven

I'm not actually sure this book is good? I tried rereading it a few years ago and I couldn't get through the first few chapters. But I read it for the first time around like 2012 and at the time it was everything to me. I drew weird black tattoos on everything for years.

10. Soft Lad by Nick Grimshaw

Another one I read over a progression of Saturdays at Ikea eating lunch. Both Scott and Nick were part of my foray into finding myself as an adult, choosing what I like and what I want to pursue. Unlike Scott's autobography (as Chris Stark pronounced it), this one definitely felt like it came straight from Grimmy's lips.

Man I dunno who would like to do this! I tag @lululawrence @becomeawendybird @kingsofeverything @louandhazaf

[baratrongirl]

Fanfiction Trope Meme

Stolen from @pigeontheoneandonly, who I don't know at all. Saw it in their blog and went "I like these questions". Rules: copy/past and bold your fic preferences and tag someone to do the same. I don't ever explicitly tag people because I don't want anyone to feel put on the spot when they could be having a bad week/month/year. I'm interested in all my friends' answers, so answer the questions if you want to.

slow burn or love at first sight. (Good question. I tend to think that love at first sight is unrealistic, because you only know what someone looks like, not who they really are. So I suppose I prefer slow burn where the affection grows as the people get to know each other.)

fake dating or secret dating. (Ugh, I like both! Though secret dating wins with Klapollo - dating in secret because Klavier's a rock star and they don't want the tabloid hassle.)

enemies to lovers or best friends to lovers. (This is how my relationships have worked in real life. We've always been friends first - at least for the relationships that have actually LASTED.)

oh no there’s only one bed or long-distance with correspondence. (Ack! I can't decide! *squishes Klapollo into one bed* vs LDR with Apollo in Khura'in and Klavier in Los Angeles/Tokyo?)

hurt/comfort or amnesia. (HURT/COMFORT. Finally, an easy one!)

fantasy au or modern au. (This one depends on the original setting. If it's a fantasy setting, a modern AU. If it's a modern setting, then a fantasy AU!)

mutual pining or domestic bliss. (Get it together, silly boys! Of course, I'm talking about Klapollo again. With some of my other ships, I prefer them to simply communicate and sort their relationship out.)

smut or fluff. (I like both BUT if we are simply talking about tropes in the absence of plot, I prefer Porn Without Plot to Fluff Without Plot. Fluff Without Plot leaves me feeling unfulfilled, like I ate candy floss when I wanted a meal. Fluff WITH Plot is fantastic, and I've written quite a few Teen-rated fics myself. Smut is definitely not essential for a good story.)

canon complaint or fix-it fic. (Fix-it!!)

alternate universe or future fic. (AUs are fascinating.)

one-shot or multi-chapter. (Depends on the story, of course. If it's high-quality, I can easily read 150k of fic in a night. What is this "bedtime" thing you speak of?)

kid fic or roadtrip fic. (I am not really a fan of either, but I LOATHE kid fic. Fan-created OC children make me break out in metaphorical hives. Though - I say that, and I would still absolutely love to read a story where Trucy (aged 25+) offers to be the surrogate for Klavier and Apollo, since she is Apollo's sister and has the most similar genetic makeup to him. I guess I'm more interested in the negotiations (will they accept it? Does Klavier even WANT children which are genetically his considering how Kristoph turned out?) than the actual part where a baby exists.)

reincarnation or character death. (NEVER character death, I hate it - and it's an actual squick to the point of being triggering with my main ship. Whereas reincarnation, finding each other again and again in different worlds over time - OMG I love.)

arranged marriage or accidental marriage. (Especially if accompanied by queer lawyers with legal shenanigans.)

high school romance or middle-aged romance. (Middle-aged fans demand middle-aged Blorbos! 35 is not "old", you teenage Narumitsu fans.)

time travel or isolated together. (Can't decide. As long as it's not a tragedy where they're separated by time, or where one is already a ghost while the other is alive, I don't much mind.)

neighbors or roommates. (No actual preference.)

sci-fi au or magic au. (Slight preference for magic, but only because SF is hard to write well.)

body swap or genderbend. (No preference, though I should perhaps observe that F/F Klapollo are barely any different to M/M Klapollo unless you're writing smut. Body swap, however, is hilarious because you have Mr Tall, Skinny, and Beautiful suddenly inhabiting the body of Mr Short, Buff, and Ordinary - and vice versa.)

angst or crack. (Angst with a happy ending. But I do love a good crack fic too!)

apocalyptic or mundane. (Mundane please. Apocalyptic fic stresses me out instead of being fun.)

[samthecookielord]

💝❤️❤️🕺💘❤️💘❤️🕺❤️😳💝 if you were a pokemon what type(s) would you be

1 says: "electric/ghost baybeee. just like rotom fr :] peace on earth <3 id be like one of those silly regional evolutions probably (trust me this makes sense if you know my silly weird backstory)"

2 says: "Oh, I believe my daughter has mentioned Pokemon a couple times. I'm not very familiar with all the types, but... perhaps ice? Ice feels very calm and quiet, and somewhat like glass."

1 says: "my SWAG and COOLNESS im litearlly so hot and amazing and hilarious ooo you wanna kiss me so bad ooo"

2 says: "I... Hm... I suppose... I'm quite good at cleaning rooms. I like having a tidy house."

(tourney post)

Previous answers:

1 said (R1:M10) - Q: "what’s your ideal burger" - A: "BURGER ! ! ! YEAW !! ! ! ! !! !!!!! ideal burger is made by the friends we made along the way"

1 said (R2:M5) - Q: "how do you feel about shapeshifters" - A: "damn that would be so swag gender. well i can kinda do that but not rlly its not like im actually shifting my shape im just like hey looking at me im tricking (like the hit game) this michaelwave or whatever lolll"

1 said (R3:M3) - Q: "Opinions on nicknames? Do you like giving them? Receiving them? Have you gotten any that stand out to you? Would you like to get more or less?" - A: "DUDE NICKNAMSE ARE LIKE. MY BRAND. i better win this one guys cmon my nickname swag is sooooo cool awesome sauce. one of my BESTIES gives me a REALLY SWAG NICKNAME its [REDACTED] oh wait i guess im not allowed to say that or else itll like ruin my anonyminity or whatever 🙄🙄 ok be that way. as if im not obvious already 🙄 cuz im just so iconic 🙄 whatever im changing this guy's contact names again"

---

2 said (R1:M13) - Q: "who is the WORST person you know?" - A: "There's... definitely someone that comes to mind immediately. I'm... not sure if I'm ready to talk about it just yet though... Sorry. Would you like some tea, instead?"

2 said (R2:M7) - Q: "what would you do if I offered a kissaroo from me to you ?" - A: "Well, I don't know you very well so I'm not sure how comfortable I am with that. However, I do appreciate you asking first, thank you."

2 said (R3:M4) - Q: "What matters to you most in a person/relationship? Is it different between different relationships (friends, partners, coworkers, etc.)?" - A: "What matters to me most in a relationship is trust. I... want to know that those closest to me will always be someone I can trust... People who know they can trust me. People who... people who will listen."

[phoenix-is-the-hottest-thing]

@cloud-ya mentioning dislike of rita and elysia’s flirtiness actually got me thinking. because i do enjoy this trait of theirs a lot

of course most of this is personal taste but part of the reason I enjoy it is because in media most of the confident flirts are guys (who I am not into) or, occasionally, women who exist exclusively to be a villain seducing some protagonist dude

Rita technically falls under an adjacent category due to being an assassin herself, but she’s not a villain anymore, and she has quite a bit of development that makes her more interesting than an evil pretty face anyway. while it was funny (Tesla’s ongoing bondage hatred should get more jokes!!) I didn’t like Rita all that much until she showed vulnerability in Arc City. Like that’s when I got really sold on her— she’d been so confident up until then, but she got depowered and wounded and her friends started dying

Really a bad day for Rita and my whump loving ass was thriving. she recovered quickly, and she certainly didn’t break down, but she was really in a tight spot and that was a really fun moment. That CG where she’s on the floor? Hell yeah baby.

Anyway so Elysia it was completely different!! And I find that interesting.

I adore Elysia. Not because she’s easy on the eyes (though I understand the plethora of seeeeeeegs jokes, she IS very pretty) but mostly because of her absolutely shameless attitude. The flirting is hilarious, not just because she doesn’t hold back at all, but also because it’s put in contrast with Mei’s very firm “no” attitude. The writers really got a good dynamic going, with Elysia being completely out of control and paired off with more calm/stoic straight man characters to contrast her bullshit.

(for those who don’t know the straight man in comedy is the role of the normal guy in a duo, who’s going to give opportunities to make jokes, react to stuff normally to provide contrast etc etc. often the voice of reason used in a comedic manner, usually the butt of the joke but sometimes funny BECAUSE they have a good point. has nothing to do with lesbians)

Even better, Elysia in all her ridiculous attitude sometimes surprises you by being down to earth herself. Like the recollection where she tells Kevin mid angst monologue that if he dramatically hits a street sign he’ll have to pay it off. She always makes herself sound very reasonable but actual role reversal is hysterical.

Elysia, for all intents and purpose, is a Mary Sue. She’s good at everything, she’s well liked by everyone but villainous-seeming characters (Mobius), she’s basically perfect in both body and actions, she never fails anything and seems to find all of it easy. Even when she loses against Mei, she does so gracefully— and she’s quickly noted not to have given it her all anyway.

But she’s a Mary Sue the writers are very, very aware of; and she’s put in contrast with characters who don’t buy her charm because of that. It’s good writing, man.

Her archive entry is a good example of this:

If you really like tropes, you might have seen meta jokes of Mary Sues actually being terrifying eldritch entities seducing everyone. That’s basically what Elysia is. We don’t know her true nature, but her charm and talents don’t seem fully natural, and she’s DEFINITELY hiding something.

In summary, she’s a largely beloathed character archetype but actually written competently, and frequently subverted by her own environment to offset how insufferable the type of character she is would otherwise be.

To go back to Rita— Rita was mostly just underdeveloped early on. She was outwardly seductive, the maid thing was kinda weird, we had zero insight into any deeper motivations… she basically existed to be a hot, perhaps even fetishy obstacle. Most people do not like Rita upon meeting her, because she’s very shallow at that point. Early Rita even shares some of those insufferable Mary Sue traits— effortlessly tricking the heroes or murdering Gray Serpent— but there’s nothing to contrast it, so she remains a hot obstacle instead of a deeper character.

And of course, a significant bit of her character development is locked in the Dudu VN, so if you haven’t read that you don’t know much about her from playing the game, especially before she starts investigating Heliopolis.

So yeah! There’s just nothing solid to like!

Elysia can be interesting and likable from the start in part because she’s incredibly funny if that’s your sense of humor, and because you quickly realize she’s suspicious (mysteries are fun! mysteries get you to pay attention!). Obviously you CAN also dislike her, but most people seem to enjoy her. It’s less a matter of writing and more personal tastes or bad personal experiences clashing with how she was designed to be. I have a friend who really dislikes her because they’re wary of her and protective of their favorite characters, so they see her as sort of an enemy. The flirtiness and suspicious behavior can also be points against her, if that’s not your thing, etc etc. But for MOST people, Elysia is funny, mysterious and likable, as a bit of a parody Mary Sue who the writers are exploiting the archetype’s uncanniness of.

Rita on the other hand suffers from her fetishy design (both appearance and personality) and shallow early characterization, if you’re first impressions kind of pal you’re probably not going to like her easily. Her early writing isn’t great, so there just isn’t much to like. Even the development she gets later, the vulnerability, while I find it delicious, may not be your thing either… and she was even retconned to appear earlier in the story, like Hua, so she originally had even LESS build up. There just aren’t too many reasons to get attached to her, especially around her first appearances.

So yeah. In conclusion, I think comparing these characters mostly just shows how far the writing of Honkai has come! They’ve gotten really good at introducing characters in a way that makes most people WANT to know more about them, and then disseminating clues in the rest of the story. The visual-novel-as-a-reward format of ER is really suitable for it, too, so they played really smart on that.

[theic-manic]

On a fucking hilarious note, I love that I am an Ares and Apollo devotee and Apollo's RSD has definitely been a damn mood before I started my shadow work...

Like for real, I've laid down some real dark curses during rage episodes to eventually calm down and think "okay perhaps I've gone a tad far..."

Then you know, Apollo just goes "nope, you made this bed now lie in it" and absolutely annihilates the health of those who have set me off.

Chemical burns from skincare products

Covid

Other Horrible illnesses...

It's now at the point that my non- spiritual friends just ask me wtf did I do now whenever there's a local outbreak of something...

So my relationship with Apollo has really forced me to simmer down and self-manage better because I do feel a teensy bit bad when he pops off on my behalf.

Occultists, witches and spiritualists really need to stop peddling the lie that spirituality, witchcraft, paganism, etc. isn’t a psychological phenomenon as well as a mystical one. Your psychology will in fact, fundamentally inform your experiences with spirituality.

And we also need to stop pretending that spirituality and witchcraft are somehow contrary to mental illness. Or that having a mental illness means you can’t do witchcraft.

I’ll be completely honest with you guys and say that certain people with certain afflictions are more predisposed to different “mystical” experiences than others. I don’t think it’s a great coincidence that I am so great at visualization given that I was raised in a severely neglectful household. It doesn’t surprise me that many pagans are lonely people. This doesn’t mean to say that spirituality is “filling” a hole within anyone (although if it is, that’s great for you) but more so that, well, this path is unpopular for a reason. Alternative subcultures are alternative for a reason, and outcasts and rejects usually find a home there for a reason.

This also doesn’t mean to say that people who engage in witchcraft and spiritualism are inherently mentally ill. There is still a difference between hallucinations and spiritual encounters. And there was never any rule that said that both of these things cannot happen to a single person. For the safety of yourself and others we should be aware of the warning signs of dissociation and hallucination, but that doesn’t make anyone “wrong” for experiencing those things. And experiencing those things doesn’t mean you cannot explore spirituality or do witchcraft.

I hate it when “spiritualists” who are actually just anti-vax conservatives push the narrative that people with mental health issues cannot participate in spirituality. I also despise the notion that mental health issues are inherently a sign of an energetic imbalance. We’re all walking around with a special concoction of brain soup in our heads, it doesn’t surprise me that Ares devotees tend to have BPD, that many Aphrodite devotees struggle with self harm, that many people who work with angels have paranoia or generalized anxiety.

There was never any rule that said that you cannot use your deities or magic to help you cope with your mental health. I know some people will say “the Gods aren’t here to be your friend or hold your hand through life” but I’ve seen no evidence to suggest that’s true. I see no reason why a God like Ares couldn’t help his devotee with BPD come down after a bout of rage, I see no reason why Dionysus couldn’t help his devotee with their alcoholism or substance abuse, I see no reason why Aphrodite couldn’t help a devotee with relapse or negative self talk.

Witchcraft and paganism were historically used as a tool for survival, to bring people ease, to help people feel safe and secure, blessed and protected. That applied to all people, including those with mental health issues.