#also to be CLEAR she is looking sad here because of The Plot and not bc of the spay she Doesnt Know About

[rookflower]

hey starclan i think frostpaw should get some time off from your bullshit forever now thanks

[satoruxx]

PARACOSM OF THE GODS.

PAIRING: gojo satoru x f!reader, geto suguru x f!reader | 11.5k words

SUMMARY: ok here we go, canon au, angst, fluff, best friends being in love, stsg being whipped but unable to express it, reader is clueless as usual, timeskips, canon compliant deaths, bittersweet, longing, mutual pining, emotionally stunted teens, dad!gojo makes an appearance, hopefully that’s it i'm tired of typing

RHEYA'S NOTE: highkey lowkey stressed posting bc this has been sitting in my wips for 4 years now. i honestly didn't have to add much to it i basically just proofread. but yeah when you maladaptive daydream and create a plot where you're a character in jjk and you're also in love with gojo and geto this is what happens. a little sad to let this go but it's time !! plus i can add more parts later. but anyways pls lmk what you think, i'm super curious to know <33

i. the unknown

satoru's first impression of you is anything but kind.  

his words come casually, free into the wind without care, and they aren't meant for you to hear. instead, they fall only to suguru's ears, evoking a deep chuckle and a slight shake of his head. his bangs swish a little with the movement, but satoru is too busy eyeing you over the frame of his shades to notice. 

you're lucky to have not heard it, because the intent with which it was said would have probably made your brow tick with frustration. he says it without a thought, as if he hasn't the slightest bit of interest in you as hints of arrogance fill his tone. 

"who's the rookie?" 

satoru and suguru sit outside against the patio railings of the classroom they had chosen for the day. it overlooks the grounds of the school, where they have a clear view of who approaches the main entrance. suguru absentmindedly clicks his lighter—shoko had gone to get another pack of cigarettes. 

it is from this higher point that they have a clear view of you. you're so obviously new to this, satoru thinks as he watches how you awkwardly stand in front of yaga sensei. 

he already wants to label you as a side character. it's mean, he realizes—cruel even, but he can barely bring himself to care. 

"yaga sensei mentioned that there'd be a new student joining us this week," suguru says, fingering the bangs hanging in front of his eyes. they roam over you with only slight interest before uttering your full name, just as his teacher had said it.

satoru repeats it with a hum. "not a big name or anything. a small-sized family of sorcerers i think." he shrugs carelessly. "but honestly i never really paid attention to all those stupid clan and jujutsu family lessons." 

suguru only responds with a good-natured chuckle, tearing his eyes away from the scene to look at his friend. "no shit." 

the two sit in quiet silence, watching yaga's lips move in structured, emotionless greetings as he shakes your hand. satoru is especially focused on the hunching of your shoulders and the way your eyes nervously dart around. 

suguru is the first to interrupt the peace. 

"maybe she's strong?" 

"are you kidding?" satoru scoffs as he stands up straight, shoving his fists into his pockets. he turns his nose up slightly. "that's not the attitude of someone who's confident in their abilities." 

ii. routine 

"can i ask you guys a question?" 

a cool breeze tickles your skin, goosebumps rising in its wake, and you suppress a shiver. the smell of the air tells you winter is fast approaching. 

"you just did," satoru hums, his snowy hair splayed out against stems of green grass. suguru's chuckle reverberates deep in his chest, and you have to push back an exasperated smile. 

"another one then," you press, leaning over satoru's face to force yourself into his view. his blue eyes pierce through yours over the dark-rimmed frames of his glasses, and even after seeing them so many times, they still feel as dominating as the first. he hums again, and you take that as your cue. 

"what did you first think of me when we met all those months ago?" 

satoru sits up quickly, and you can already feel your shoulders dropping when you catch a glimpse of the teasing smirk on his lips. he shifts so that he's directly facing you, leaning close so that the two of you are barely a palm's distance from one another. 

"thought you were an annoying little rookie~" he sings and you immediately shove at his shoulder.

"'m not a rookie anymore," you huff, and satoru laughs joyously. suguru only grins, his eyes darting between the two of you happily. satoru moves himself into a proper sitting position, digging his long fingers into your bag of chips and popping one into his mouth. you swat at his hand, even though you don't mean it, because though you complain about gojo satoru all the time, you would give him the whole world if you could. 

you and satoru take turns reaching into the bag. you wonder if the sound of crunching disturbs suguru. he's not asleep—he's just doing that thing where he keeps his eyes closed and escapes to his own land of tranquility. you'd like to give him as much peace as you can, so you stay quiet. satoru does too, but you think that's just because you aren't talking to him. 

the quiet is nice when you're with them. sometimes silence makes you feel alone—paranoid. it feels like there is some impending doom hovering over your shoulder, and all you can do is wait for it to come. but with them it is different. you know that any danger in the quiet will be caught by the two of them. maybe that's why it's so easy to let your guard down around them. you trust that they won't let you die.  

"i thought you were weak," satoru pipes up after a few minutes of silence. "you didn't seem like you were confident in your abilities, and that's a sign of weakness." 

after spending so much time with satoru and suguru, the word weak has permeated almost every one of your conversations. later you learned how much more significant it was for them to label someone as strong. you chase after the word—crave it.

"and turns out that wasn't true." suguru adds with a smile, his head leaning back against the trunk of the tree. his eyes are still closed serenely and you wonder if he can feel the way you're gazing at him. 

"yeah and now you act like some big hotshot," satoru grumbles, as though he doesn't want to admit to his old mistake, but you can hear his smile. it annoys you, the way his once degrading little nickname has now somewhat turned into a term of endearment. you would rather die than admit that you like hearing him say it. 

"well, I'm glad that i was able to prove you both wrong."

the conversation ends there. 

shoko returns a few minutes later, tossing you a can of soda and suguru a pack of cigarettes. as soon as she sits down in her spot under the tree you're forcing your head into her lap and kicking your feet onto satoru's legs. you ignore his complaints, because you know that in just a little bit he'll quiet down and his hand will rest over your ankle, fingers soft but firm. they'll occasionally drum some rhythmic tune, or draw nonsensical patterns against your skin.

shoko's fingers thread through your hair, just like they always do, and you know that in a few minutes you'll doze off in her lap, just like you always do. it's clockwork, this thing that you have with them. they make the days keep going—time doesn't stop for you. 

a part of you wishes you could freeze time at that moment. 

but you can't. 

iii. halcyon

"hey suguru?"

"hm?"

"how come you always do your hair the same way?"

suguru glances up from his book. he's seated at your desk, and for a minute, the breeze pushes your curtains so that they block your view of him. satoru groans lightly from your left, turning on his side to snuggle deeper into your pillow, and slumber overtakes him once more. him and shoko remain quiet, faces free of worry as they dream in a land that is so unlike the real world you live in.

"what do you mean?" suguru asks in response to your question. he has an amused smile on his face as he places his book on your desk, though his thumb and pointer finger keep his page.

"well…" you suddenly feel stupid for asking, but he's looking at you so intently now. "you have such nice hair. you could style it in so many different ways."

"are you saying you don't like my hair the way it is?" he frowns.

"no no!" you scramble, shaking your head emphatically. quite the opposite actually you think he's so so attractive—how on earth did you screw this up so badly? "that's not it i just—"

he laughs, tilting his head fondly. "i'm just messing with you, hotshot."

you blanch, before crossing your arms with a huff. "asshole…"

he chuckles, before lifting a calloused hand up to finger the tie that holds his hair in a bun. he glances back at you, before a michevious smile settles on his face. he gives the tie one sharp tug, and the bun falls away. black hair drops, resting on his shoulders, and you stare at him—oddly parched. wind brushes through the open window, tickling your curtains, tickling his now open hair. you had seen his hair down before, of course. in the few seconds after a sparring session when the bun had gotten loose, or when too many strands escaped the tie and fell in front of his face (he always pushed them away with an agitated huff). but now he looks different—good, you realize. he looks good.

"how should i style it then, hotshot?"

his question shakes you out of your daze. you hum in contemplation. "i don't know."

he laughs quietly, as to not wake the other two. "didn't you just say there were so many ways to style it? enlighten me then," he teases, reaching over to grab a small scrap of paper from your desk. he slots it where his fingers are holding place, and then closes the book. he swivels in the chair to face you completely, rolling over so that he's right in front of you.

"well…" you start, biting your lip in thought. "a ponytail maybe?"

suguru bunches his hair into his fist, holding it up against his head. "and? how do i look?"

you grin, eyeing the new style with a stifled laugh. "fantastic."

he laughs again, louder this time, before dropping his hand.

"it looked good though!" you laugh and he rolls his eyes fondly.

"yeah yeah," he dismisses with a wave of his hand. he looks back at you, eyes tracing over your hair before he grins wide.

"i like yours."

you blink. "mine?"

"the way you did your hair today," he points to the half up-half down style you've thrown together. a dark blue ribbon holds the hair in place—satoru had said it matched nicely with your uniform. suguru's eyes gleam as he appraises it. "it's nice. it looks really pretty on you."

something in your chest feels like it fell off a cliff.

"oh—" you stumble, before smiling at him because that's all you can do when he makes you feel like this. "thanks suguru."

"do mine like that," he says quickly.

once again, you blink owlishly and all you can manage is a stupid "huh?"

"do my hair like that," he repeats, getting up from the chair to sit at your feet, back towards you. he crosses his legs and puts his hands in his lap, patiently waiting.

"you can't do it yourself?" you tease, scooting closer to the edge of the bed.

"i can," he replies and you can hear the easy smile in his voice. "but i want you to do it for me."

"okay then!" you laugh before gently parting sections of his hair out. and then you work in silence, putting more effort into his hair than you've ever done with your own.

iv. fragility

"lady riko does not have any relations. when she was young, her family was involved in an accident…since then, i've been her caretaker. so please let her at least spend time with her fr—" 

"—so that makes you her family then." 

suguru's words seem to stun kuroi, the weight of riko's situation finally making itself clear as her face crumbles. 

"…yes." 

you listen to the way her voice wobbles, and try to suppress the poisonous lump forming in your throat. 

"then we do everything we can to make her happy," you say solemnly, leaving no room for argument. suguru seems to agree and says nothing—some deeper part of you feels something more than thankful towards him. 

"you're awfully sensitive for a jujustu sorcerer, you know that?" satoru comments offhandedly. you turn to look at him, meeting his piercing gaze over dark rims. 

"maybe," you concur. "is that considered weak?" 

satoru seems to ponder his answer, before shrugging, a light smile on his face. "to some people, maybe." 

you manage to smile back, and he takes in the expression with an odd look on his face. "say what you want, satoru. but you agree with me, don't you?" 

he looks away, eyes gazing out to the distance where you know riko is currently in class with her friends, trying to live the life she wants, and something in them softens considerably. 

"we'll do things the way she wants us to." 

it's one sentence, said without a smile or laugh, but hearing it fall from satoru's lips makes you beam at him. 

that's just your kindness, isn't it, satoru?

your heart leaps when you notice the tips of his ears tinge with rouge. 

v. longing

riko's hand is warm against the coolness of your fingers. your body feels hyperaware of your surroundings, toes deep in hot sand and salty air sticking to your skin. for some odd reason, you can't seem to relax. unconsciously, you tighten your grip around the young girl's palm. she glances up at you, but when you look down at her, she's wearing the biggest smile you've ever seen. 

satoru's presence makes itself known behind you—his shadow looms over yours in the sand. "it'll be fine," he says.

you can't see his face, nor can you see suguru who stands at his side, but your shoulders drop slightly, and you find yourself smiling back at riko. 

"i'm getting in the water!" she squeals eagerly, before dragging a helpless kuroi with her. satoru laughs—a clear, pristine sound—and follows after her. you watch the three of them with a fond smile, something akin to content settling deep within you.  

"and what are you planning on doing?" suguru asks. you turn to look at him, watching the way his heavy eyes stay focused on you. 

"hmm," you quirk a brow mischievously. "build sandcastles with me?" 

suguru blinks owlishly before he breaks out into a good-natured laugh. 

"deal." he walks closer to the water's edge, where the sand is damper, and crouches down. he turns to look at you over his shoulder. "don't make me do all the work, hotshot." 

you stand there, taking him in—really taking him in. he's just as clear as the sky behind him, and the sun shining on his face makes his smile glow. you want him to continue smiling at you like that well into the future. the waves crash onto the shore, as though the ocean is chasing his radiance, and an overwhelming feeling of unfiltered affection swells in your chest. 

your feet carry you forward, and you think that they might always lead you back to him. 

the sun rises as time passes, and occasionally you spare a glance at satoru and riko, who are screaming as they splash water at one another. and then you catch a glimpse of kuroi, who stands with her feet in the water, a soft smile on her face. 

and in that moment, nothing can be ruined. 

"what's wrong?" suguru's voice calls out, and you tear your gaze away from the others to look back at him. he stands behind you with two strawberry ice cream cones in his hands. 

"nothing," you hum, a serene smile on your face. "everything's perfect."

his eyes trace your face, stopping to linger on your smile, and they soften. "it is, isn't it?" 

he turns to the ocean, watching satoru and riko, and his eyes sparkle. "i hope it stays like this always." 

"me too." 

he bends down to take his place at your side before he hands you a cone. you take it from him. suguru's eyes drift away from you to look down at his castle. 

"i think it looks great," he expresses, before taking a lick of his ice cream. 

you roll your eyes with a huff. "yeah, because you made it look so nice. you're unnecessarily good at this, suguru." 

he laughs, waving his hand dismissively. "no no, we did it together! and yours is nice too!" 

"maybe," you grin, looking at his castle. "but yours is extra pretty." 

he smiles back, before pointing at a small hole in his sand tower. "see this room? it's yours." 

"mine?" you chuckle.

"yeah, all yours," he hums softly. "this is my castle and you get your own room." 

"oh? and why's that?" 

suguru's gaze lingers on you, and his dark eyes soften considerably. "because you'll always have a place in my home." 

you stare at him, speechless—something hammers away at the inner crevices of your chest. 

"and this one—" he points to another hole a few inches away from the first. "—is my room." 

"well in that case, that room is mine too!" you declare.

"what?" he barks out a laugh. "how does that work?" 

"well…" you grin at him, the sun burning into your cheeks. "because my home is wherever you are!" 

suguru's cheeky smile fades and his eyes widen. he looks at you, mouth agape, and you're about to say something else before sticky coolness trickles down your wrist. 

"ack!" you hurry to wipe away the strawberry ice cream dripping down your skin and you completely miss the red that creeps up his neck and seeps into his ears. 

vi. ice bath

shoko's fingers are unbelievably soft. you're grateful that you were unconscious through most of her procedures on your battered body—you don't think you would've handled the pain too well. she's quiet as she works over the large wound that now covers almost half of your torso. the man with the scar on his lip had done quite the number on you, and you don't think you'll ever forget the searing ache of his blade slicing through your flesh. he had left you in a bloodied pile, isolated, and you hadn't seen what had happened to suguru after the man shot riko. you could only lay there, vision swimming as a bitter taste filled your mouth—a reminder of the life you failed to protect.

the pain had been the only thing you could focus on, until satoru was on his knees at your side and tightly gripping your shoulders. your hazy focus was drawn to his lips as he spewed curses and insults at you. 

"why didn't you run away, you little shit," he had shouted, a feral look in his eyes. there was something different about him—a change in his very being that you could see even in the throes of death. "shoko's coming, do you hear me? for fuck's sake, keep your eyes open, hotshot!" 

you swore you saw his eyes shine behind that look of uncontrolled anger. he had been talking a mile a minute and your focus had waned until you could only see his lips move, no sound reaching your ears.

you've never thought satoru looked more godly than he did at that moment.

suguru eventually found his way into your field of vision—knelt at satoru's side. his large hand had squeezed your limp fingers in a death grip. he was sweating, and his eyes were darting back and forth between your pale face and bloodied torso, something akin to guilt swimming in them. you wished that you had the strength in you to squeeze his hand in return. the last thing you remember seeing is his dark hair falling in front of his face as he turned to shout at whoever was approaching.

now you're awake. disoriented and bleary, but awake, and all you can look at is the way shoko's bangs fall over her furrowed brows. she's taken care of the bleeding, and now all that's left is a dull throbbing, reminding you of how close you had toed the line with death. you don't know this yet, but the scar will remain for the rest of your life, and that dull throbbing will be a permanent reminder of your narrow escape. 

shoko hasn't said a word since she noticed your eyelids flutter open. you want to ask her so many things. important things that cannot wait: 

where's satoru? how about suguru? i saw them both. satoru's alive, right? and suguru, too? the man—with the scar. where did he go? he said that satoru—riko….where is riko? and—and kuroi…i—i..couldn't save riko. when did you get here, shoko? and why am i the only one who's being taken care of by you? 

you want to ask her. but she's making a very odd expression as her hands ghost over your body. you've never seen it before, this odd quirking of her lips. her teeth sink into the bottom one, and she chews and bites and nibbles like it's some kind of nervous tell. 

"shoko?" 

it's all you can manage to say—all you dare. your voice is dry, shaky, and sounds almost foreign to your ears. you're going to ask more, at least one of those thousand questions you had asked in your head earlier, but you don't get to because she speaks before you. 

"shut up," she spits, and the wobble in her voice has you pinching your lips shut and feeling closer to death than you did before. 

vii. acid rain

the sound of clapping is deafening. you don't think you've ever heard a sound so horrid in your life before, and you feel as though your ears are bleeding heavily. you can faintly make out the conversation between satoru and suguru, your ears struggling to pick out the tones of their voices. 

"no…" you hear suguru say quietly. "it doesn't matter if I'm fine…"

you can feel satoru's eyes roam over your motionless body, watching the way you gaze out into the crowd impassively. 

"let's get out of here, guys."

your feet carry you numbly, and you aren't aware of anything except the way riko's arm is swinging in front of you lifelessly. there are no mirrors around—no way of catching the track of tears cutting over your cheeks. the places where the salt touches burn like acid. you say nothing. 

satoru's gaze feels intrusive. he doesn't need to ask you anything—he just knows. it's like your body is radiating the emotions tumbling around in your gut. 

you're awfully sensitive for a jujutsu sorcerer, you know that?

"do you want to…kill them all?" 

the question stuns you, and for the first time, you can shake yourself out of your daze to look at satoru directly. blood is smeared over the left side of his face, cerulean eyes dimmed, as though something had pulled the shine out of them. red seeps into the fine hairs of his restless eyebrows. 

"right now, i probably wouldn't even feel anything," he continues, staring at you listlessly.

you think satoru might be feeling just as numb as you are. you don't know what happened to him yet. the last you had heard, gojo satoru had been killed by the man with the scar. he had boasted about it to you before he attempted to kill you too. but then satoru was at your side again, completely alive as he ran your battered body to shoko like a crazed man. 

you'll find out later who the man with the scar on his lip was, and what kind of legacy he had left behind. but for right now, all you see is a teenager with the weight of the world on his shoulders, and you know your answer.

satoru could help the pain go away; he'd be able to make the clapping stop—maybe then your ears wouldn't bleed anymore. but you couldn't ask that of him. 

"forget it. it's pointless," suguru mutters, and you're glad he's on the same page as you. not because any of these people deserve pity, but because satoru deserves a break—one less burden for him to carry. 

you hear suguru say more, but you can't focus. you continue to listen to the sound of the clapping, and once again lose yourself as you stare at riko's bloodied fingertips. 

"pointless, huh?" satoru mumbles in response to suguru's answer. "does there need to be a reason?" 

"of course. it's important," suguru's voice doesn't carry the same pleasant tone it always does. instead, it sounds strained, and tired beyond belief. unsure. "especially as jujutsu sorcerers." 

satoru doesn't respond, but you know that he's measuring the weight of his friend's words. that's how it was with the two of them. they both balance each other out—their moral compasses influenced by one another. but then you feel satoru look up from riko's body and turn to you. suguru follows suit, and before you can wonder why, it hits you: satoru had asked you both. 

you suck a deep breath in, feeling unusually breathless. the flesh of your stomach tingles with a painful reminder of what might've been, and you make up your mind. 

"killing them won't change anything," you say, breaking your silence. the tears on your cheeks have dried, but they leave a rigid trail in their wake—a trail that still stings. "let's just leave it at that." 

viii. fever dreams

satoru lies next to you. 

a few nights have passed since riko's death, and you've chosen to stay holed up in your room. you're not sure why—death has always played a big role in your life. you don't understand why it's different this time. 

tonight is different as well. while you've maintained a distance from everyone since that day, save for classes and passing by people on school grounds, today you've decided to let someone in. satoru's the lucky one, mostly because he would've pestered you until you opened your door for him anyway. 

it's strange though. he had knocked over and over, and when you finally opened up with a snappy jab at his annoying personality, he had brushed straight past you and laid across your bed. he hadn't said a word since then, and you've found yourself lying next to him in silence for quite a while. 

his hand stretches out in the darkness and you can feel his fingertips brush over the skin of your arm. it's delicate, like he's testing his limits, but you understand. it's just to ground himself—to know that you're still here, with him. to be sure that you're still alive.

you think the scar that goes down your body bothers him a lot more than it bothers you. 

"'m here," you mumble sleepily. your fingers reach up to bump against his knuckles, and you hear him inhale deeply. his voice is throaty when he replies. 

"i know." 

ix. doubt

satoru learns that you've never been kissed before and he teases you for it.

not in a mean way, but in a way that has your cheeks heating and your eyes avoiding his. suddenly it feels like the gap between ages 16 and 17 is huge. he's barely even a year older than you and you're in the same year, but it feels as though he knows so much more about the world than you do. you want to ask suguru if it's bad that you've never had a kiss, but you don't. suguru rarely talks these days. sometimes he'll have conversations with you but won't look in your eyes when he speaks. 

"hey listen, hotshot. if you don't get a kiss by…" satoru hums, an eager smile on his face as he swings an arm around your shoulders and contemplates his words. "…let's say 27, then i'll give one to you!" 

there's an odd note of glee in his voice. 

"shut up, toru," you groan, heat flooding your cheeks. "quit joking around." 

he laughs loudly, pulling your cheek teasingly. "aw, i'm just playing. it's not a bad thing i promise!" 

your shoulders relax slightly as the snowy-haired sorcerer continues to speak. 

"i just thought that you would've kissed someone by now," he shrugs. "wasn't there that one guy you went on a few dates with? the one you met when we went to yokohama?" 

there's an almost sour expression on his face as he speaks, but you're too frustrated to care. "just because i went on a couple of dates with him doesn't mean i kissed him!"

a broad teasing smile appears on satoru's face. "is that so?" 

"ugh, i'm only 16!" you hiss, shoving him away from you. "besides i'm saving it for someone special!"

"good," you hear suguru speak up, and you turn to look at him. his fingers are interlocked, elbows resting on his knees, and he's staring down at his hands like they hold the answers to some deep questions he has. "it is something irreplaceable after all." 

x. shadow

satoru's grin is proud as he stands before the three of you, his loose shirt billowing in the summer breeze.

you stare at him, heart thumping as shoko lets out a confused gasp. "huh? what the hell was that?"

"did it automatically choose the target for your technique?" suguru asks.

"yep!" satoru stresses the word, spinning the pencil suguru had thrown as he explains. "though i am the target. i've pretty much automated what i used to have to do manually."

your head is spinning.

"now i can tell an object's danger levels based the strength of its cursed energy, its speed, mass, velocity, shape—whatever. i want to be able to discern poisons too but that's pretty hard right now." satoru's voice is even when he explains, though you can make out the hints of pride that permeate his tones. you think his voice has gotten a little deeper too. "basically this is gonna allow me to keep my limitless technique active all the time!"

"that's gonna fry your brain!" shoko interjects, shaking her hair out of her eyes.

"yeah but i can do it while i continuously generate energy on my own. that way my brain stays fresh."

you can't help but let out an amused scoff. "what brain?"

satoru chucks the eraser at you, and you laugh as it bounces off your shoulder harmlessly.

"i've been working on shortening my hand signals so i can activate red and blue simultaneously." he continues, lips twitching upward as he gives you an exaggerated glare. "after this the only things i need to work on are domain expansion and long-distance teleportation. which i should be able to do if we set up some training courses here at school."

you think if someone examined you closely, they would see the stars in your eyes when you look at satoru.

"shoko~" he calls out, grinning eagerly. "think you could get me some lab rats?"

shoko groans as satoru bounds over to pester her more emphatically. you watch him, thinking you've never seen a person quite so magnificent.

god personified into a 17-year-old body. and yet it is a body that stays so close to you—well within your reach. maybe there's nothing so godly about that at all.

"don't you get tired of getting stronger and stronger, jeez?" you complain, crossing your arms as you raise a brow at him. satoru wets his lips as he throws you a smug smile.

"don't worry hotshot, you'll catch up to me someday!" he gives you an exaggerated wink over the frames of his glasses, and you shake your head somewhat fondly.

"no way! i never want to be at your level," you huff. "i'm very comfortable living in your shadow, thank you very much!"

a strange look passes over his face, almost puzzled, but the dip in his brows melts away as he approaches you. "well—" he slings an arm over your shoulder. "if my shadow makes you happy then you're more than welcome to stay there."

you don't have time to reply. pale lashes flutter at you—a backdrop of cerulean. you think white and blue may be the prettiest combination of colors in the world.

"suguru?" satoru's voice is casual, yet the amusement has dropped from it. his arm is heavy around your shoulders. "have you lost weight? are you okay?"

you look up, seeing tired eyes behind dark stands of hair. suguru's cheekbones are prominent, and you have the sudden urge to reach out and trace your fingers over them.

his lips twitch upward weakly. "it's just the summer heat…"

his lavender eyes drift to your face as he says it, and he tilts his head as he scrutinizes your worried expression. "…i'll be fine."

xi. hellfire

you hear suguru before you see him.

his breaths come loud as he pushes the door to the morgue open, the metal clanging heavily. his eyes bore into your back, taking in your clenched fists and raised shoulders that seem to tremble.

you wonder who told suguru you'd be here. maybe nanami, who was here not long ago, and had sent you a text that merely said: the mission went badly.

or maybe it was satoru, who had been chatting with you near the entrance of campus when he saw the myriad of emotions pass over your face as you read the text. he had probably called suguru as soon as you left.

it doesn't matter—you can't bring yourself to care.

you can only think about the way haibara had smiled at you before he left that morning.

now that smile is covered by a dirty white sheet, and you can't tear your eyes away from it. the taste of blood and vomit is heavy on your tongue.

suguru says your name quietly. you can't even look at him—you're scared that you'll cry if you do.

you don't ever want to cry in front of him. or satoru—so weak in front of those who are so strong.

"he asked if i wanted to go with them and i said no because i was lazy," you hiss, teeth clenched as you spit out the words with venom. "if i had just stopped thinking about myself for a second—"

your fingers dig into the flesh of your palms—deep, deep, deeper.

you hear suguru click his tongue, and his hands wrap around yours. he yanks your fingers apart fiercely, thumbs smoothing over the bloodied indents you've made in your own skin. you tear your eyes away from the body to finally look at him.

"don't—" his breath catches as his thumbs still over your flesh, eyes going hard as he takes in the blood.

he blurs in and out of focus. his head whips up when he hears you sniffle, and his lips slant ruefully. "you—"

"i'm fine," you interrupt, blinking pointedly and taking a deep breath. "it's fine—i mean it's not fine—but i c—"

"stop." suguru grabs your shoulders, giving you an even stare. you don't know how you didn't notice it before, but he looks thinner, older. there are dark circles under his eyes—poison seeping into his skin. "you need to rest."

you stare back at him silently, but you don't feel like you agree. something about this is making you feel restless, like there is so much you need to make up for. his grip tightens, before he's wordlessly leading you to take a seat—he finds his place next to you.

"satoru took over the mission." he stares at the lifeless body on the table as he speaks. you lower your gaze.

"and nanami?" your throat feels like it's closing. suguru inhales deeply.

"he went back to the dorms."

"okay."

you try to figure out if there is any meaning in having this conversation. despite everything, weren't you expected to wake up tomorrow morning and head out on a mission once more? and when you return, you're sure that there'll be another faceless body taking haibara's place.

the cycle continues—clockwork. it scares you, just how replaceable you are.

haibara, nanami, you, another, nameless—interchangeable.

not like satoru. not like suguru. not like the strong.

you lean your head against suguru's shoulder, fingering the hem of your uniform skirt. the fabric is cool to the touch—it seems darker, heavier. heat radiates from the body next to you, and there's something about him that's making your stomach churn with nerves. "suguru?"

his voice sounds far away. "hm?"

"are you okay?"

he stiffens and you suddenly fear you've said too much—nosy, intruding, out of place. you stumble. "it's just, we haven't talked much lately."

"i'm fine," he answers, and you can hear a smile in his voice—whether it's real or fake you can't tell. "just a little tired."

you know there is truth to this. but it scares you, how this tiredness of his has lingered for months. you don't know how to tell him that.

"okay…" your voice is barely a whisper, heavy with unspoken words that you don't know how to formulate. somehow you find that silence has always been your only option.

but like usual, silence with suguru has never once been uncomfortable.

haibara's smile burns behind your eyelids.

"it should be a relatively simple mission. if you're not doing anything today senpai, would you like to come with us?"

his voice tickles your ears.

"that's alright! i'll get going then! oh right, today's mission is a little farther than usual, so we'll probably be back late! what would you like me to bring back for you?" 

hypoxia crushes your lungs, your blood burns. selfish selfish selfish. you've only ever cared about yourself.

suguru's arm curls around your shoulder before you even realize you're crying. his palm is warm as it smooths over your hair, and all you can worry about tainting him with your ridiculous tears.

you don't ever want to burden him—just want to quietly live in his shadow.

"i don't—" you internally cringe at the throaty rasp of your voice, swiping a hand at your nose. "i shouldn't be so sensitive about—"

"it's not your fault." he quietly hushes you, grip tightening imperceptibly. through your tears you can see him adam's apple bob, and for some reason that makes you feel worse. you're too scared to look at his expression, even though his voice is resolute. "none of this is our fault."

something has changed in the way he speaks now. something has settled, a confirmation of some idea that has been brewing for a long time now.

you don't say another word, but somehow he manages to sear himself into your very being. he's warm, and fuzzy, and he smells like sandalwood and incense. 

you don't know how long suguru let's you pathetically sob into his shoulder.

but you think you're embarrassed that he has taken pity on a wounded animal's cries.

xii. split

he looks different, but also the same. you've seen him wear that sweater before. it's plain black, no patterns, and you know that there's a loose string on the inside of the left sleeve that he was always too lazy to cut. you've always liked that sweater—always liked the way he looked in it. 

you liked it so much that you've even stolen it a few times yourself. 

but now it looks different. older and dirtier—as though soiled by some unknown curse. 

that's what everything came down to, right? curses. 

suguru stands in front of you, almost no trace of emotion on his handsome face, and his expression makes you want to turn and run. you miss the calm serenity that normally graced his features, wishing that you had some kind of cursed technique that could turn back time. but you aren't blessed like that—you wonder what sin you might've committed in a past life that made you so unlucky in this one. 

"you look confused," he comments. you reel at how casually he speaks to you, like it's just another afternoon sitting under that stupid tree. like he's leaning his head back against the trunk and watching you and satoru bicker with that fond look in his eye. 

"suguru," you speak, an odd strain in your voice. you struggle to comprehend this odd turn of events. you've had time to understand that he's now a different person than the one you once knew. you know that he's responsible for killing 112 innocents, including his own parents. you know that he's now an enemy to jujutsu society and you know that you should kill him right at this moment.

but he looks so much like suguru, like your suguru, that you can only manage to stand there, frozen in place. his eyes drift over your body, taking in your pajamas, the bath towel in your hands, and the small drops that trickle from your hair, and you can see the familiarity settle in his expression. 

"why are you here?" you choke out. you feel an overwhelming sense of danger in your gut, knowing that your family is just a few rooms over from where he stands now. 

"at your family home, you mean?" he asks casually. a small, almost amused smirk appears on his face. "you said i was always welcome." 

you did say that. sometime last year or the year before, when you had invited satoru, suguru, and shoko over to visit during one of your quick holidays. suguru had sat across from you at your dinner table. he complimented the food and your father smiled one of his rare smiles. you had chewed quietly to hide your grin.

you don't know what to say to him now. 

"everything they said about you," you whisper, taking a step toward him. he remains rooted in place, but his eyes follow your movements. they shift when he catches your fingers gripping your towel tighter. "is it true?" 

"do you think it is?" he asks, and you gulp. it feels like he's baiting you into some kind of trap. 

"i don't want to believe that it is," you answer, voice shaking. "that you would ever do something so…"

the sentence hangs in the air, and he tilts his head imperceptibly. something in his eyes changes as he focuses on the drops falling over your shoulders. 

"well i'm sorry to squash your hope," he raises his arms in a shrug. "but everything you heard is completely true." 

your head aches, but you're not surprised by his confirmation. "why would you…?"

suguru hums, a dark look falling over his face. "do you remember the conversation we had after haibara's funeral? do you remember what i told you when he died?" 

anger flares in your gut at the mention of haibara, and the bath towel crumples in your hold. "don't say his name," you hiss through gritted teeth. "don't act like he's the reason—just…don't bring him into this. please." 

suguru licks his lips, eyes going soft before he tries again. 

"everything used to make sense back then," he sighs. "back when the strong existed to protect the weak. but it's not true." 

"suguru—" 

"the reason why we suffer is because of them," he interjects evenly, though frustration is clearly evident in the curve of his brows and the volume of his voice. "we clean up their messes. they create problems and we die for it." 

you're stunned into silence, at the way he's raising his voice at you, at the way he's speaking so firmly about this horrible topic, at everything. he seems to realize the effect of his speech, and he quells his anger to speak quieter. "that's why i'm doing this. i'm going to create a world without non-sorcerers, so that sorcerers like you and i can live peacefully." 

a lump forms in your throat because god, he's right. he's so right. your life would be a thousand times better without curses. non-sorcerers were the reason curses existed. but the way he's going about this…

"suguru," your voice shakes, but you press on. "i get it. i really do—" 

"i know you do," he interrupts. "you always have. even back then…" 

he takes a step closer to you, reaching out to finger the towel in your hands. "but you don't agree with the way i'm doing it, right?" 

you bite your lip, and he smiles at the sadness in your expression. "you're so easy to read, hotshot." 

you ignore the way the nickname stings. "i just—how could you kill innocent people like that? your own parents, suguru."

he looks away from you, steely resolve in his eyes. "if i made exceptions for my parents, that would kinda make me a hypocrite, wouldn't it?"  

you don't know what to say to that. he doesn't seem to have anything else to add either. 

he looks around your old bedroom, eyes sparkling as they catch a picture of the four of you from your first year. satoru's arm is slung around shoko. the dark-haired female has her elbow resting on your shoulder, her tongue sticking out playfully. you're clinging to suguru's arm, and satoru's free hand is squishing your cheeks together. the four of you are laughing. 

nobody has laughed in a while now. 

you tear your gaze away from the picture frame to look at him. he's so unbelievably close, and he's gazing down at you with this foreign look in his eyes, the picture forgotten behind him. 

he slips his fingers into your hair. his palm is large enough that it can brush the side of your face, and you wonder why your body doesn't flinch away from those bloodstained hands.

"it's okay," he mumbles, a faraway look in his eyes. they remain trained on your hair, but it feels like he's looking straight through you. like you're nothing more than a ghost he wants to erase. he's so close—you can count his dark lashes as they brush against his cheeks. "it's difficult. i don't expect you to understand." 

his words incite a sudden flare of anger in your gut. it burns something fierce, and in that moment you hate him. 

"no, i don't," you reply indignantly. he pauses, now really looking at you, and his brows quirk upward in what seems to be surprise, because—well, he's never seen you make such an expression at him before. "you never tried to help me understand. you just left." 

a strained silence follows. his fingers twitch against your cheek.

"this doesn't concern you," he says finally. "i don't need you to understand my actions." 

you recoil, as though he's physically hurt you, and your expression falls so hard that it almost makes him regret saying it. almost. 

"if it doesn't concern me, then why are you here?" you ask again, and you see suguru's shoulders drop. "you know that i have orders to kill you. i might not be able to because you've always been stronger than me. but you know that i'll…" 

go down fighting you, is what you want to say, but the words leave a nasty taste in your mouth. but suguru seems to know what you're implying because a wry smile appears on his lips. his fingers twirl a strand of your wet hair. 

"i'm here to say goodbye," he says finally. another tense silence fills the space between you both, and suguru can see the way your fingers shake between the folds of your towel. 

"you're a little bit late for that, aren't you?" you choke out, a strange tilt to your voice as you break eye contact with him. "you left school weeks ago, and you didn't say a word to me then." 

"better late than never, right?" 

the softness in his tone makes you turn to look at him again, and you desperately want to ingrain the features of his face into your head. the gentle slope of his eyes and sweetness of his smile. he almost looks like the suguru you once knew, and you suddenly have the urge to mourn his death. 

his face becomes blurry, the edges becoming less pronounced, and you can see the way his expression falls. 

"i didn't come all the way here to make you cry." his hand drops from your face and he takes a step back. your fingers hurry to wipe at your waterline, and you shake your head. 

"'m not crying." 

suguru smiles ruefully, and his eyes suddenly look devoid of life. he takes another step back—your heart plummets.

he says your name once, quietly, and it hangs in the air as you wait for him to say more. 

he doesn't. 

"you know that I'm not supposed to let you leave alive, right?" you mumble, fingers toying with the towel in your hand. "but i can't—i mean—"

"hm," he chuckles. "still as sensitive as ever, huh? s'okay…" 

he moves toward you again and his hand gently cups the back of your neck. "i think it's your best quality. makes you better than most people in our world."

he presses his lips to your forehead tenderly, and you feel your eyes widen behind your tears. 

you probably could've stopped him, because you're aware that he's now suddenly behind you, and that he's raising his hand. you can stop him, but a part of you thinks that if it's death at suguru's hands, maybe it's not such a bad way to go. 

you accept your fate then and there. 

you'll find out later that suguru never had the intention to kill you then. perhaps he was waiting for a more opportune time, waiting for there to be a meaning behind it. you're not sure. but when you wake up tucked in your bed cozily, you'll feel the remnants of him lingering around you.

he was warm, and fuzzy, and he smelled like sandalwood and incense.

xiii. sanctify

satoru's at your door again. 

you've memorized his knock patterns. he always knocks three times, then leaves a pause, then twice more. for someone so erratic, he can be quite predictable. 

"what's up, satoru?" you call out, not looking up from your busy hands. there are a couple of empty cardboard boxes open on your bed, and you've been placing things into them all morning. things that should've been put away a long time ago. you pause on one of your old test papers, and in suguru's dark, blocky handwriting you read: 

YOU GOTTA STUDY MORE DUMBASS.

underneath it, satoru had scrawled: 

hotshot failing class now huh? :P

and shoko had added: 

both of you stfu you're failing too 

you had drawn a heart next to her name. 

"whatcha doin'?" a familiar voice chirps. "spring cleaning?"

satoru stands directly behind you, peering over your shoulder. you can practically feel his aura shift when he notices the items you're putting away. 

"cleaning of some sort," you sigh, before turning to look over your shoulder. "i've been…putting it off." 

he doesn't move—just continues to stare down at the paper in your hands. you think maybe you shouldn't have let him in. sometimes you forget that satoru might have his own sensitivities—you've always viewed him as the strongest.

a few strands of his hair tickle your cheek, and you scrunch your nose in response. he then turns to you, eyes blinding as he studies you over the frames of his shades. 

"want help?" 

"please." you don't intend to sound so needy, but the way you whisper the word has him immediately grabbing your wrist and sitting you down next to him on the bed. 

"how are we sorting this stuff?" he asks, his voice oddly calm. he hasn't let go of your arm yet, and some quiet part of you is grateful. 

"i was putting our old school stuff in that box. books, papers…" you answer softly, and satoru nods in understanding. "and in the other box…" 

you inhale deeply through your nose. satoru waits, strangely patient. you're not sure if you're imagining it, but you think he squeezes your wrist. 

"…are all of suguru's things." 

there's a moment of silence—a quick mourning for what is no longer there. 

"it's stupid stuff that he left behind, you know?" you chuckle, even though nothing is funny. "some old shirts from when you two would sleep over, his old textbooks, a few pictures from our holidays—shit like that." 

satoru hums. he's not looking at you—instead he's staring at the box, a frown on his face. 

"i guess he didn't really need those things for where he was going. or for wherever he is now," you mumble. 

"guess not." 

you're not sure what's going through his head. satoru's reaction to suguru leaving had been chaotic at best. it was so hard to tell how he felt about it. you knew he was angry, confused, betrayed. but he never showed things like that. you think it might have to do with being the strongest. you're not sure though—you never were strong like him.

you wish there was a way to tell him that he could share his feelings with you, but you can't think of a way that won't be awkward. 

a ticklish sensation crawls up your wrist and you look down to watch satoru's first two fingers tap against the inside of your palm. his thumb brushes against yours as he lets out a heavy exhale. 

"let's get started then, hotshot." 

he looks down at you as he says the words, and you think you might cry. but you want to be strong, like him, so you offer him a smile. he gives you one in return. you realize there isn't that much warmth in it, not like it used to have—you're sure that yours isn't that warm either. 

but it's enough for the two of you. 

"you look tired, toru," you chuckle wryly, reaching up to brush a few strands of hair from his face. his eyes flutter at the touch, and you honestly think this might be the most vulnerable you've ever seen him. 

"so do you." 

"i am," you admit honestly. 

"'s okay," he mumbles. his fingers tap against your palm once more. "'m here." 

"i know," you answer. you always are.

nothing more is said as satoru stands up. he makes his way over to your desk and pulls one of suguru's old sweaters from your chair. you watch him fold it neatly, smoothing out the creases with care, before placing it into the box—you smile once more. 

you think the scent of sandalwood tickles your nose, but it's gone in an instant.  

both of you work in relative silence, sorting through the things in your room quickly. you're surprised at how bare it looks as you're nearing the end, as though there's nothing more to your life than old high school recollections. 

you finish putting the last few polaroids into the box when satoru speaks up. 

"hey." 

you look up and find him staring at you, so you turn to face him completely, giving him your full attention. 

"zenin toji—" the name sends a painful tingle up your body. "—left something behind." 

you frown. "what are you talking about?" 

"a kid. he's got a kid. and i was gonna go meet him today," satoru shrugs. you try to read his emotions, but as usual, he's giving you nothing. "the old man said something about the zenin clan buying up his kid before i killed him. i was gonna go see if there's something i could do about that." 

you sigh before raising a brow, an amused lilt to your voice. "and why have you kept this a secret?" 

satoru's trademark smirk appears, and he walks over to sling an arm around your shoulders. "who knows?" he quips nonchalantly. "guess i was waiting until we were bored. we need something to do now, don't we?" 

you glance at the packed boxes on your bed, and then look around your empty room. everything is always changing, but satoru is constant. 

"i guess so," you grin. his eyes shine, and for a second you see a familiar teenager at the beach, and then a familiar teenager under an old tree. you think you hear waves, and the crinkling of a bag of chips. 

"good," he chirps, walking you to the door, the arm around your shoulder secure. "his name's megumi, and we're gonna make sure he gets strong."

xiv. idyll

it takes you a little over four months to get used to megumi's eyes. they aren't unsettling or invading, like a certain snowy haired sorcerer, but they do give you chills when you first notice them. chills and a fleeting feeling of metal slicing up and down through your flesh. you just have to steady your breathing and remind yourself that the son is not the father.

tsumiki is an angel. you didn't think that kids that age could be so emotionally competent, but she's a pleasant surprise. she had been awfully protective over megumi, fidgeting with a firm hand on his shoulder as you and satoru invaded their space and upturned their lives. even after they had settled into the humble apartment satoru had purchased, tsumiki was still so overly cautious. it was obvious she still didn't trust either of you, but you thought it was admirable of her, and you relay this thought to satoru one day.

"think they hate us?" he asks, squishing his cheeks between his lithe fingers as he eyes the different milk cartons over the rims of his glasses.

"i'm pretty sure they just don't trust us that much," you reply, placing a few packs of instant ramen into the cart. "can you blame them? we're just random strangers who came up and basically kidnapped them."

"i'd like to say adopted!" he points out with a grin, before he sighs. "but we've already proved we're just doing this to help them. but they still barely talk at all."

"they're just being careful. megumi's still a little young and he looks like he doesn't give a shit about most stuff anyway," you chuckle as you remember the expression on the first grader's face as he spoke to your cocky friend. "and tsumiki's being cautious for both of them."

"she doesn't need to be cautious of us!" satoru dramatically whines, pulling out a carton of whole milk and placing it into the cart. you shiver as the cold air hits your skin, eyeing the sorcerer with an exasperated smile. he shuts the door with a huff. "i've been such a good dad!"

you roll your eyes, shoving his arm as he starts pushing the cart down the aisle. "she definitely should be cautious of you, you creep."

satoru looks down over his shoulder, appalled, though his eyes sparkle with mirth. "and why do you say that?"

"have you seen yourself? crazy 19 year old man that kidnaps kids," you mutter somewhat sarcastically, falling into step with him like it's normal. satoru grins at that—amused.

"i think it's pretty cool of her to be that responsible though," you continue, voice going softer as you think about them, and satoru hums in what you think might be agreement. you suddenly grab his arm, stopping him in his tracks and he turns to look at you.

"you think we should get another carton of milk?" you question, tilting your head at him. "megumi's been drinking it every day after he comes back from school and tsumiki said she wanted to try making milkshakes."

satoru blinks at you, eyes widening before an amused chuckle escapes his lips. you're about to ask what is so funny but he gestures back down the aisle. "go get some."

he waits for you as you go grab another carton, leaning against the cart easily. when you make it back and place the extra milk in the cart, satoru slings an arm around your shoulders. you raise a brow, but he just continues to push the cart with his free hand and says nothing.

so you don't say anything either.

the two of you continue shopping, trying to remember the things you've noticed the kids enjoying because you know they'll be too uncomfortable to outrightly request them. for every sweet snack satoru puts into the cart, you add something that can pass as somewhat healthy, and he hides a teasing grin behind his fist each time.

when you're almost done, satoru motions to the shelves of snacks, raising a brow at you. "what do you need, hotshot?"

you look up from where you're analyzing the contents of the cart. "hm? oh i don't wanna buy anything for myself. i'm good with the stuff i have back at the dorm."

"great," he shrugs with a subtle shake of his head. "except you're not buying anything this time, i am. so pick something."

"what?" you frown, walking over to him. "we're supposed to split groceries for the kids."

"we can split next time." satoru rolls his eyes at you, as though annoyed by your insistence. "i just got paid yesterday and i wanna waste money. pick something."

you groan. "but there really isn't anything i want. if you're gonna pay yourself then let's just go. i think this is good enough."

satoru looks unamused, his eyes boring into yours—bright, dominating, mesmerizing. "oh really? nothing you want?"

you stare at him in confusion as he walks over to the frozen section and opens the door. after a few seconds of rummaging, he pulls out a box. "not even this?"

your shoulders drop. he's holding a tub of strawberry ice cream.

he casually places it into the cart, eyes trained on your expression as he bends down. "it's your favorite, isn't it?"

your voice comes out throaty, and you wet your lips nervously—his eyes follow the movement at lightning speed. "how'd you know?"

satoru scoffs out a haughty chuckle, reaching up to knock a knuckle at your forehead—it's cold. "i know everything about you, hotshot."

he moves to grip at the cart's handle, standing close enough that you can feel the energy radiating off of him. the side of his hand touches yours, still cold. "now we can go."

he sticks by your side, pushing the cart towards the counters as he casually looks around the store. you briefly realize that his shadow doesn't cover you when you're at his side like this. the thought both scares you and pleases you in a way you didn't think was possible.

"thanks toru," you mumble before you can stop yourself. his gives you a sidelong glance—assessing.

his lips twitch. "it's just ice cream."

"no, it's a lot more than that." you're not really sure why you say it so tragically, and satoru inhales sharply. you notice that his knuckles have turned white as he grips the cart's handles. once again, his eyes dart rapidly over your face—between your eyes and then further down.

then he lets out a hushed laugh, nudging your shoulder with his. "as long as you share with me, hotshot."

everything is always changing, but satoru is constant.

you can't help but smile. "always."

you two don't say much as you head to the counter, taking turns placing all the items on the belt. you quietly watch satoru dig into his wallet, feeling oddly content doing so. you think the stars in your eyes will never disappear.

the clerk eyes you both, and suppresses a fond grin. with your close proximity, shared cart, and satoru's easy going smile, you realize that she's probably misunderstanding, but you don't really know how to correct her. satoru says nothing—he just continues smiling, oddly pleased.

he smiles all the way to the car. you catch yourself doing the same in the rear view mirror.

xv. retribution

the first thing you notice when you kneel in front of suguru is that he's bleeding all over the place. you have the strongest urge to scramble and grip his fingers tightly, just as he had done for you so many years ago—but you don't dare. you're too scared that touching him will ruin you completely.

he says your name quietly, and yet it's the loudest thing in the universe to you—crashing over your ears until you've lost all sense of self.

and then he leans forward, his gaze heavy, and his hand comes up to tangle in your hair. his palm rests on the side of your face just like it did when he visited you at your family home. the last time you saw your geto suguru.

except this time he moves further—crosses a line. presses his lips to yours.

he tastes like blood. you don't pull away.

the feeling of his lips shocks you though, and you stay permanently frozen in place as you feel your eyes glaze over with something you can't put into words.

suguru kisses you slowly, deeply, like he's been waiting but wants to savor it. maybe you've been waiting too. you're not sure. you're so confused.

you don't even process the way his tongue slips past your lips, tasting almost eagerly like your mouth is some kind of conquest he's trying to claim.

it's intrusive, but not unwelcome. slow, but not gentle.

you whimper quietly, feeling acid sting down your cheek as he pulls away and his eyes flutter open. he takes in your expression, and a million emotions pass over his face.

a quiet chuckle. "that bad, huh?"

you shake yourself out of it and try to push away the flush creeping up your neck. "w-what?"

"you're crying," he announces, his furrowed eyebrows paired with a sweet smile that makes him look so unbelievably tragic. "the kiss was that bad?"

your face burns, and you raise a shaking hand up to your cheek—it's wet.

"it wasn't—i didn't—" you struggle. "i mean—"

he smiles ruefully. "i'm sorry. you were saving it for someone special, right?"

there's a charged silence that follows as you scour your brain for the conversation he's referencing. when you find it, your heart sinks.

"you've always been special to me, suguru." your voice comes out quiet, but he hears it all the same. his eyes widen fractionally and you can see a light pink dust his cheeks before he laughs. it's soft, hushed, and looks like it's painful, but he lets it run its course.

it reminds you of a laugh from so long ago, at a beach, with childish screams echoing against the sound of waves. you think you can feel strawberry ice cream dripping down your wrist.

his laughs die down and he's left smiling softly at you. his lavender eyes sparkle with mirth as he tilts his head. "i'm glad. that you were the one i gave a room to."

you can hear waves in your ears, crashing crashing drowning. sand is in your hands, in between your toes, in your eyes.

he coughs, and his palm shakes against your cheek. you wonder why he doesn't just let go already dammit suguru.

you inhale sharply, trying so hard to breathe because what is that stupid thing that's clogging your throat and preventing you from speaking? there's so much you have to say to him. so many questions. so many things left unsaid. your words are failing you.

but silence with suguru has never once been uncomfortable, right?

you raise a shaky hand to press against his where it lays against your neck. "do you regret it?"

he licks his lips, smiling faintly, as though he's enjoying the new taste of you on them. "no."

"why not?" you whisper. your body unconsciously shuffles closer to him, chasing his warmth because gods is he warm. he's always been so warm, even now, in the throes of death.

"my feelings are still the same. i still hate the monkeys for everything they've done, all the crap they cause." he shuts his eyes, smiling that serene smile. you wish he was leaning against a tree trunk. "i still have no resentment to those at jujutsu tech. and you, i still…"

he doesn't continue. you don't think you want him to. there's a flush crawling up his neck, the faint pink a stark contrast to the red of blood. it makes you nauseous.

another deep inhale, and his thumb slides over your jawbone, before brushing under your bottom lip. he stares at the flesh heavily, letting his finger press into it. his tongue swipes over his own lips, eyes darkening further.

and then something shifts in his face, and he smiles mirthlessly. his hand drops from your face—broken contact.

he doesn't tear his gaze away from you, committing your face to memory. it's almost like he wants to say something, but decides against it at the last minute as he slumps further into the wall behind him and shuts his eyes.

when he speaks again, you know that it is all over.

"you're late, satoru."

[demonic0angel]

Jason meet Jazz and, due to her highly liminal nature and some ghostly shenanigans, he gets the idea that she's secretly a vampire. He's kinda into the idea.

(They’re stupid, your honor 😭)

“So… what’s your opinion on Twilight?” Jason asked, leaning over the desk to look at Wolf.

She paused from reading her papers. Then she said, “Twilight by Stephanie Meyers?”

“Yeah. That one. Like with all of the werewolf and vampire stuff.”

“Well. In a way, I think it’s interesting how much of an impact it’s made, but I mostly think her writing is a reflection of her Mormon views, and the impact that it’s created on people isn’t so great when you realize that she’s discriminatory and judgemental.”

Damn, he agreed with her on everything. She was so perfect. It was almost a little sad how she was a vampire, which was probably why she covered herself so thoroughly in leather and fabric.

“I agree. I was asking more about the creatures inside though. It’s pretty fascinating that vampires sparkle in the daylight. It’s sad, of course, that they are dependent on blood and have to hide their immortality, but the plot point where Bella wanted to be immortal was quite interesting, even if a little tasteless. Not that it’s bad to be inhuman, y’know?”

She turned to him slowly. He couldn’t read her expression through her helmet, but he felt like her gaze was extremely confused. After a moment, she nodded quickly and said, “Uhm. Yes. Being inhuman is not a thing to be hated, but instead, respected like any other race. After all, we’re just trying to survive. I’m glad that you’re making your anti-discrimination policies even more clear, Hood.”

Jason blinked.

Why did he feel like they weren’t just on separate pages, but also on separate books?

He pulled down his jacket a little, revealing his neck. His armor loosened and Jason had the inkling of looking like a whore before he stomped down on the feeling. Not that it was wrong anyways. He was absolutely a whore for Wolf.

“Y’know, Princess,” he said in a very casual voice, “If you were a vampire or a demon, I’d let you feed on me.” He paused and added, “Only for research purposes, of course.”

She paused again, taking even longer to stare at him.

Jason also stared back at her, though he wasn’t really sure because both of them had helmets.

Eventually, she just awkwardly said, “Okay.”

“Okay?” He asked, hinting at her.

She nodded slowly. “… okay. I’ll feed on you if I need to.”

That was basically confirmation! Jason beamed and returned her nod. “That’s good. Feel free to do it whenever you need. I’m here for you, Wolf.”

“…….. thanks.”

[lurkingshan]

Japanese QL Corner

Counting my blessings this week as these current shows continue to absolutely kill it. These are all streaming on Gaga or provided via fansub (feel free to ask if you don’t know where to find them).

Our Youth

This week we were treated to a series of relationship negotiation conversations, several scenes so charged with tension and meaning that I am still not done processing, and a metaphor that just about knocked me out. Hirukawa can see through Minase's weak protests and just keeps putting himself near him, and now with Minase's parents likely divorcing and his impending departure abroad, he feels like he has nothing to lose, so he may as well give in to his desires. I am attuned to the pacing so I assume within the next two eps we will be wrapping up this high school backstory (brace yourselves for the horrors) and then going back to the present to see how they come back together as adults. I can't wait; this show is just killing it.

Love is Like a Poison

We begin this week's ep with the sweet smell of vindication, because as I thought, Haruto did not leave Shiba. He simply put his ring safely away and went out on a mission. Our Battle Couple continues to thrive! After another terrible encounter with his father (another strong contender for worst dad in BL), Haruto comes home and finally comes clean about the last of his secrets with encouragement from Shiba. His backstory is just as sad and horrifying as expected, and all the details of how he approached Shiba come together seamlessly now that we know he's been seeking help to avenge his mom this whole time. As a cherry on top, Shiba's bestie backs him up with the boss, and now the whole squad is geared up to take that man down.

Love in the Air Koi

CW: abuse, intimate partner violence, sexual assault

This week we transitioned from Arashi and Rei's happy coupledom to the beginning of Kai and Fuma's love story, with the flashback to their first encounter and an efficient presentation of Kai's harrowing backstory. I appreciate that this show did not flinch away from the ugliness of Kai's history, but also didn't dwell unnecessarily in the trauma. I am also noting the absence of the first kidnapping plot from the original drama--I assume this version will be combining Rei and Kai's abductions into one event toward the end of the show, which for me is an extremely welcome change. Nagatsuma Reo is really solid in portraying Kai's trauma and the intentional distance he keeps in his relationships and the fear and tension warring with his interest in Fuma was well done. Looking forward to their story.

The Fragrance You Inherit

In this episode Sakura and Mone got the chance to reconnect and Sakura finally told her story. It's sad as hell that her devastation over Mone led her to a dubious encounter with a man she doesn't know or like, but at the same time it gave her Toki, who is clearly her great joy in life. I'm happy that she got to raise him with the support of a good friend in Ryosuke, if not a partner. Speaking of Toki, it's now clear that he knows about his mom's feeling for Mone, and he is feeling her out to see what she might be willing to tell him. I'm sure he's having a lot of complex feelings, but I didn't get the sense that he's angry with his mother or concerned about his own relationship as much as he is sad that Sakura has kept this huge part of who she is a secret from him. Sakura wants to shield him from things he already understands, and she's too caught up in her own past trauma to recognize that the very fact of queer people existing will not come as a shock to her son. I love that the show seems poised to tackle that generational culture aspect of this conflict alongside the interpersonal dynamics. You can find the show here, with big thanks as always to @isaksbestpillow for providing English subs.

[magnolia-among-the-stars]

the last bit of us (chapter two)

Plot: Tyler Owens hasn’t been home in a year. He’s survived all the storm chasing and motel living with his new partners as they try to save lives. But with all the damage they’ve taken from driving high beams first into monster storms, it’s time to pay the piper and bring the truck in for repairs. And the only person who can fix them is the best mechanical engineer he’s ever met. Eleanor Harding, his estranged wife.

Pairing: Tyler Owens x Estranged Wife OC (Harding Daughter)

Word Count: 2.7k

Playlist Song: the great war by taylor swift

prologue / one / two / three

I try with all I have to not feel any sort of pain over the look of hurt on the woman - Kate’s - face. That look of betrayal, like someone had killed her dog. Like a lover had kept a deep dark secret. I try to shake it off and hold on to the anger that my sad excuse of a husband had decided to show his face at my office. “So, I’ll ask again,” I turn back to the man in question. 

His smile has fallen and he looks at Kate almost apologetically before he drags his gaze slowly back to me. I ignore the sweet swirl of emeralds and sapphires in his eyes, I let the embers in my chest simmer. “What the hell are you doing here?” 

Tyler opens his mouth but all that comes out is an awkward gurgle of uhs. He clears his throat and glances down. I follow his gaze to see the thick clay mud speckling his good boots. The boots that I bought him on our first anniversary to wear to the rodeo. “I, uh…” 

I look up into his face with a hard gaze. I watch him close his eyes, collect himself. “I don’t have all day Tyler,” I say. My hands start to shake a little, the overwhelming buzz from the embers starting to billow into a subtle flame. The heat of anxiety starts to warm me from the inside out. I cross my arms tight over my mesh vest to stop the tremble. 

“The truck’s in rough shape,” he says, eyes opening to stare down at me. 

The loud cackle isn’t my intended reaction. It rips through my throat before I know to keep it in. I look over at Kate, gagging the slight discomfort in her features turning a little disturbed as she watches the two of us. I raise a brow at her and laugh again, turning back to the man. “Oh, the truck is in rough shape.” I nod once, then twice. I turn around to my team, watching with apprehension in the bay. “The truck’s in rough shape,” I call out, waving as if to say ‘false alarm guys’.

I can see Tyler wince again in my peripheral vision and when I turn back to him, the light nature of my tone is wiped from my face. “Go fuck yourself.” 

I only make it to the gate when I hear the music peeling down the dirt road. It’s loud, guitar riffs coming from the speaker on what I can only imagine is their RV. I watch as the other wranglers park and come staggering out of their doors. “Sorry we’re late, I had to stop t’ get some gas and,” Boone’s loud voice travels across the space as he comes up to Tyler’s side. He must miss the hard lines of Tyler’s face because he catches my eye and comes running. 

“There she is,” he calls out, wrapping his arms around my waist and spinning me around in a tight embrace before I can say anything. “I missed you, Ms. Fix It.” Boone’s voice is soft as his scruffy chin digs into my collarbone. 

The southern drawl of his nickname for me is a soothing cup of water, nearly extinguishing the burning in my chest. Boone was like a golden retriever. Boone had done his due diligence to send me postcards through the time since I’d last seen everyone. They’d always been blank, just pictures of different southern county spectaculars across the states but catching a livestream of the wranglers’ channel discretely playing on Carter’s desktop when he’d gotten up to go to the bathroom one day, I’d realized it had been the sweet man checking in. I missed his enthusiasm deeply, frustrated that Tyler not only took my heart with him when he disappeared one night but also that he took his whole crew of friendly faces with him. 

“Hey there Boone,” I breathe into his neck, my arms wrapping tightly around his shoulders. “Couldn’t have sent a warning postcard?” 

The tall man pulls back, “You got my postcards? Oh gosh, that makes me so glad,” he says, placing a hand over his chest. My words register in his mind and his smile stretches wide with guilt. “I’m real sorry ‘bout that. It took all my convincin’ to get the guy to even drive here. Did he mention the truck?” 

“He sure did,” I nod, acutely aware of everyone watching Boone and I. Boone seems in his own world, blissfully oblivious to the two crews watching us. I glance back at the truck where Tyler, hands on his hips, speaks in hushed tones to Kate, another man I don’t recognize and Lily. She catches my eye and waves. 

“Can ya help? Ya know there’s no one else who can fix her up the right way,” Boone says, fixing his dirty cap on his head.  

“Boone, ya’ll can’t just show up here after all this time and just ask me to fix up the truck,” I say. There’s pressure starting to build behind my eyes and I have to shake my head to rid the feeling. I step backwards out of his grasp. 

“I know it’s a real shit thing to do. We wouldn’t have come if we weren’t desperate,” Boone says. He takes a peak over at Tyler, looking back at me with puppy dog eyes. “He would not have come if we weren’t desperate.” 

The comment tugs at my heart strings and I can’t help but look out at the fields around us. The tall grass sways lazy in the breeze, the sun starting to rise higher in the sky. My stomach growls a little. I sigh, starting to shake my head again. 

“Please El,” he asks again, my real name not something I’m used to hearing from Boone.

“Goddamnit Boone,” I say. I wipe a hand over my forehead and lick my lower lip. “What’s wrong with the damn truck?” 

Boone’s face brightens immediately, a wide grin back on his face. He hoots in glee, rushing the few feet across the path to hug me tightly. “Thank you, thank you,” he kisses my cheek a few times, his scratchy mustache rubbing against my skin. I try to push him off with a small laugh, noticing Tyler turning to look at the commotion. 

“Boone, Boone,” I say, laughing a little more at his excitement. “Show me what’s wrong before I change my mind, you bastard.”

He backs away, arms raised in surrender as he leads me back over to the truck. “Alright so, Ms. Fix It has offered to take a look at the sucker to get Betty back into tip top condition,” Boone announces to the group. Back in front of them, the lighthearted feeling of the moment with Boone fades though I catch Lily winking at me as I round the truck to look it over.

I can see the mangled iron of the drill blades under flakes of dried mud and grass. “What did you do to my base drills?” My tone is sharp as I turn to look at Tyler. 

“That was actually me,” a small voice quips from my right. I turn, identifying it as Kate. Hand raised, sunglasses tucked on top of her shiny caramel hair and guilty expression. My brows pinch together. “I took the truck through an EF5, got dragged through the ground. We’ve been going into more storms and Tyler hit a rock,” she continues. 

I only look at her, nodding slowly. “They weren’t built to survive EF5s but I guess that’s one way to test them…is that it?” 

“The rocket rig button isn’t workin’,” Boone adds. “We really need somethin’ with some more power.”

“Boone,” Tyler says, shaking his head at the man. He turns to me. “I can fix that, if you can just help with the drills.” 

I scoff, walking toward the driver’s side to pull the door open and examine the console but Tyler beats me to the door, sidestepping in my path to prevent me from tugging the door open. “I said, I can fix it.” 

“You came all the way here for a mechanic, didn’t you? Let me inspect the work,” I say, tilting my head and narrowing my gaze at him. 

“She’s been running mostly fine, just needs the drills,” he says again, squaring his chest. He looks calm for the first time since stepping out of the truck.  

I poke a stern finger into the soft material of his flannel as I say “Do you want my help or not?” 

He doesn’t flinch, only staring down at my hand hovering near his chest again. He must notice the lack of wedding band and the dainty engagement ring adorning my ring finger because when he looks back up at me, there’s a far away look in his eye.

“Move so I can see what other damage you’ve caused,” I say. 

It’s a low blow. I know it. He knows it. But too much time has passed for me to be kind in my compromising. The hard, stubborn look in Tyler’s eyes fades and softens at my retort. He looks away with a shake of his head, stepping aside while tugging the door open at the same time. My arm brushes against his shoulder as I slide past him. I lift myself into the driver’s seat and glance down at the panel of buttons I’d cleverly designed years ago when he started going out more seriously into the field. 

Crumbs are scattered all in between all the buttons, sticky residue from duct tape collecting dust. “God, would it kill you to take care of this and clean it every now and then?” I ask, cautiously brushing some of it away. 

Tyler ignores me, watching as I look over everything. I glance forward to see if my team is still watching and inhale sharply. The visor is flipped down to block out the sunshine. Gone is the old, tattered photo of Tyler and I on our first date. In its place sits a fresh, glossy photo of who I can only assume to be Kate staring at a storm. It catches me by surprise and the burning embers in my chest return. I make a mental note to dig out those papers from my junk drawer in the kitchen.

I look over at Tyler and we stare at each other for a moment. He’s watching me apprehensively, searching my face for a reaction, maybe an outburst. “Are there flares or rockets in the fittings?” I mumble, turning back to the buttons without waiting for his response. 

I barely hear him call to everyone to back up and instead try to shake off my unease. I hit the bright red button to shoot off the rockets and wait for anything to happen. I push it a few times, clearing out some of the crumbs that I can feel grinding up on the sides but still get nothing. There’s a piece of tap beneath the hitch button, Kate’s Barrels scribbled in Sharpie. I purse my lips and grab the joystick, pushing the button to deploy the drills. They shutter a little, digging into the ground and rattling to a halt with one digging further down than the other. I push the button to retract them and sigh, starting to climb out of the truck. 

“Well?” Tyler’s voice is thick as he steps closer. 

“You’re fucked,” I say, not bothering to look at him and instead motioning for Charlie to open the gate. 

“Can you fix it?” the curly haired man next to Kate asks. 

I look in his direction, then Boone is smiling like an idiot. “Course I can. Boone, can you get the truck inside for me?” 

Boone moves to jump into the truck at my request but Tyler grabs him, tugging him out of the seat to climb in instead. He starts the engine and Boone races to catch up to me instead. He’s joined by the others, walking behind me to the warehouse. 

“TempestEdge,” the curly haired one reads our sign and we get to the bay door. 

“Carter, can you grab my tablet please,” I ask and he nods, running back to my desk. 

“Wait, you guys are those government contractors building and updating infrastructures to withstand storms,” he says, sounding in awe. “You guys are like, state of the art.” 

“We try,” Charlie crosses her arms, tight smile on her lips as she and Birdie watch Tyler drive into the warehouse. Charlie nods in my direction. “El’s the mastermind of the operation, I just crunch numbers.” 

“The team is the mastermind of the operation,” I say, rolling my eyes. I put my hand out to shake his and Kate’s reluctantly. “I don’t normally come off this harsh. I go by my maiden name, Eleanor Harding.” 

“Javi Rivera,” he says slowly, trailing off. 

“Kate Carter,” she introduces herself, shaking my hand. “Sorry for the awkward introduction.” 

I don’t know how to respond so I just nod, turning to walk further into the warehouse. Carter meets me halfway with the tablet, while the others head back to their desks. “Thank you,” I say, starting to swipe through our inventory for possible scraps and parts I can use to fix the truck. Carter stops me though, placing my phone on top of the screen. 

“Before you do that,” he says, his voice quiet with the surrounding guests. “I think you should call your mom.” “Carter, my mom can wait for a call back. She probably wants to hear about how the test went. You know how she gets on days like today,” I say, pocketing my phone and going back to the tablet. 

“Wait,” Javi exclaims. I turn around in surprise, noticing he’s looking at some of the photos on the siding of the warehouse. “That’s where I know that name from. Your parents created Dorothy, they’re legends.” He turns back to me, eyes wide. My phone starts to vibrate again in my pocket. 

I dig my phone back out from my pocket to see the 14th missed call from my mom. “They’re something alright,” I say. A text pops up then. I read it quickly, passing the tablet back into Carter’s chest. 

“I was trying to tell you,” Carter says, holding my bag and keys out  to me. “I’ll catch a ride home with Charlie.” 

I glance up at him, the pressure behind my eyes building again. Can anything go right today? “Thank you.” I turn to head out to the truck without another word. Heavy footsteps stomp behind me, chasing me out the door. It’s not even 10 AM yet as I unlock the truck. 

“El, Eleanor, where the hell are you going?” Tyler bellows as he catches up to me. 

“It’s gunna take a few days to get parts, alright? I’ll call Boone when the truck is ready,” I say, tossing my bag into the passenger seat and starting the engine. It takes a few turns before the engine roars to life. Tyler’s hand catches the door, preventing me from taking off. 

“Hey, talk to me,” he murmurs, leaning into the cab. “What’s going on?”

“Don’t pretend to care all of a sudden, Tyler. You’ve got what you came for, I’ll fix your damn truck so that you can go head first into the next monster of a storm with your girlfriend, alright? I need to go,” I say, my eyes glossy when I look away from his hand to his face. 

He steps closer, pushing with force through my tight grasp on the door. He’s silent as he reaches up to grab the seatbelt, stretching over my hips and torso. I squeeze my eyes shut, distraught as my hands only find comfort on the steering wheel. The click of the buckle is so loud in my ear and I have to remind myself to take slow breaths until Tyler is no longer invading my space.

“Leave the reckless driving to me,” is all he says before closing the door and stepping back. I do my best not to look in the rearview mirror and I peel off down the road to St. Mary’s Medical.

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[itsabouttimex2]

Sooooo... How do you feel about the season 5?

In short? Mid. 6-6.5/10.

In long…?

A severely rushed season that bit off way more than it could chew. A season that had the characters pull powers from their asses more frequently than ever before. A season that had shitty “dramatic” moments for the sake of having dramatic moments. A season that lampshades issues instead of fixing them. A season with so, so much wasted potential.

It basically boils down: everything they wanted to do COULD have been good, but they just didn’t have the time.

I’ll go into some varied details below. I’d also like to make clear- I’ll be tagging all of my Season Five Posts with “Lego Monkie Kid Season 5” and “LMK Spoilers” until August 1st. Then the gloves are coming off and I’ll stop tagging them.

(I still liked the season, for what it’s worth- and you can watch it in full here! I’ve got some drafts and bots cooking as we speak!)

This was a cute send-off to Flying Bark! It was nice of them to acknowledge, in some way, everything that those dears did for the show- because Lego Monkie Kid would NOT be where it is without them.

Significantly less cute-

The absolute kick in the fucking face that constantly superimposing old footage over newer, worse footage is.

You don’t want us to be constantly reminded of the animation downgrade- that’s the literal last thing that anyone wants. Why would you constantly remind us that it used to be better?

What the fuck does this accomplish? Okay, let’s make comparisons, cause that’s the only thing that can result from pulling this shit-

This is what happens when you constantly reference the older, superior content.

PEOPLE CONSTANTLY NOTICE THAT YOUR CONTENT IS WORSE.

Also, why is it so saturated? How do you make a Lego Minifigure look like he has jaundice?

It’s just a bad look to constantly reference content you can’t live up to. I’m hoping they’ll just recreate old content instead of sloppily pasting it into the background of the show- it’ll be less jarring.

Alright, what else…

———

Yay, I called it! Nuwa is not MK’s “loving though bereft mommy”! Which I had been guessing ever since the Celestial Pagoda leaked, actually-

I mean, come on. He’s literally stealing the stones away from her as she reaches to take them back.

And the Season confirmed it! Nuwa might’ve be been MK’s creator, but she certainly wasn’t his momma.

And you know how the series subtlety clues you in to how little she cares about her “son”?

Nuwa didn’t give him a name. She had hundreds, maybe thousands of years to think on it- but no. No name.

We mortals name our pets, our vehicles, our art. We love them enough to bestow monikers.

Nuwa didn’t even bother to name her own sapient mortal creation.

But when he makes a move against her, does something she doesn’t want, takes destiny into his own hands?

She calls out to him with one word- not “son”. Not ��MK”.

Nuwa angrily calls him “mortal”.

Becuase that’s all he ever was to her, really. A mortal pawn. A handmade puppet.

Someone designed to fulfill a sacrifice. Even though her intentions were good, MK’s sole purpose by her hand was to shoulder the weight of the world like a good little hero.

So… a potential “villain” in the making?

———

Lampshading the fact that you’re doing the “macguffin hunt” again does not excuse doing the “macguffin hunt” again.

Lampshading the “apocalypse after apocalypse” plots doesn’t make them any less exhausting.

Lampshading Macaque’s lack of narrative consequences does not undo the awkward and weak redemption arc.

———

They changed Mei “no longer wielding” the Samadhi fire, I guess.

Ignore that she never displayed a hint of concern or sorrow over “losing it” because now she’s sad and worried (after backlash from the fans over her losing it) about losing it.

Like, Subodhi knows so much about the world and the universe that he’s aware of his existence in the ink scroll- but he gets Mei not having an interplanetary level threat inside her wrong?

I smell a retcon.

———

Macaque’s redemption arc is still shit. I’ve got a whole rant queued to release soon, actually- I imagine it might be the final time I comment on his arc until Season Six.

To put it short- Macaque still falls upwards into redemption. No pushback or difficulty or introspection. He’s just a magically better person without any onscreen development to make the change believable.

But they reference this at one point?

Sun Wukong points out that Macaque escapes the trial without any punishment, and is just allowed to mope in place of an actual consequence.

So maaaaaayybeeeee they’ll do something in Season Six? I’ve lost all faith that he’ll ever be an interesting character again, though.

He’s essentially just “brooding rival #80058”. Instead of being a character that calls back to Seasons 1-3, from 4 onwards he’s just a brand new dude who totally didn’t commit any atrocities with a smile on his face- and he’s a worse and more boring character for it.

———

If I haven’t misjudged the intent, I think Monkie Kid will be going back to being an episodic series for the extent of Season Six. Again, they lampshade the “apocalypse after apocalypse” thing, yeah?

And now they have a perfect formula- find someone who’s having trouble with their new power, and help them.

And we might see Bai He again???

Let’s hope for a good breather season!

———

Rest in piss Li Jing their asses did NOT cook with you sorry papa

You could’ve been interesting in the writers didn’t try to pull a “loving father” bait and switch after you got like four scenes of being a raw jackass

If they were going to deviate from the source material and make you a good dad couldn’t it have just been:

“Li Jing, you were not invited to the trial!”

“STF that monkey son of a bitch hurt my baby boy-“

“Father I’m 300-“

“Hush son, let daddy take care of this- that monkey son of a bitch hurt my baby boy when he stole the Samadhi fire map!”

Maybe next season you’ll get to be interesting, hun.

(I’m still writing for Lotusfam though)

———

Drama for the sake of drama. 0/10 scene. Could’ve just had the interruption come AFTER they held hands, but no. Gotta drag shit out for the shippers or whatever. There was no reason to prolong this reunion.

I’m really not a fan of the “just wait another season for it”, mentality. Stop stretching shit out. You had a chance to do something sweet and heartwarming, and chose not to for the sake of trying to drag a conclusion out.

Ugh.

———

Characters just pull powers out of their ass for the sake of forcing dramatic scenes.

THESE ARE DOGSHIT SCENES

THIS MAKES NO FUCKING SENSE. THIS IS DONE SOLELY FOR THE SALE OF “MUH DRAMATIC FINALE” AND IS BAD

ITS BAD WRITING TO HAVE CHARACTERS PULL NEW MAGICAL POWERS OUT OF THEIR ASSES FOR THE SAKE OF DRAMA

IF WUKONG HAD THIS POWER FROM THE START HE SHOULD’VE USED IT AGAINST HIS FUCKING LETHAL ENEMIES AND NOT SAVED IT FOR HIS PRECIOUS STUDENT

MK NEVER LEARNED TO USE THE FILLET SPELL. THE WRITERS PULLED IT OUT OF THEIR ASS TO FORCE DRAMA BY HAVING MK TORTURE HIS MENTOR LONGER THAN EVEN THEIR ACTING ENEMY LI JING DID WITH A CIRCLET THAT IS CANONICALLY TIGHTER THAN HIS FIRST

WE SEE HOW FAST HE IS WHEN HE FIGHTS THE AZURE LION

MK CAN MOVE FASTER THAN WUKONG

HE COULD’VE BEATEN HIM THERE IN AN EQUALLY CLIMATIC RACE

I FEEL NOTHING WHEN I WATCH THIS BECAUSE IT IS FORCED DRAMA FOR THE SAKE OF DRAMA

—————————————————

💚💚💚

[houxe]

Regarding my SBI/DSMP Fics

TW: Abuse, Trauma, and Mentions of Suicide.

With all that has happened, I did want to come out here and make my stance clear. I will always stand with Shelby (Shubble) and all of the victims who are speaking out against Will Gold (Wilbur Soot). If you still support that bastard, unfollow me and leave my blog and whatever small community I made.

I've already stated this is my Discord channel, but I want to put it here too.

For me, c!Wilbur is so far removed from cc!Wilbur that I don't connect the two. The characters are vessels for my own characterizations and stories. It's a bit like writing Supernatural*, Twilight, or Hazbin Hotel fanfics. I don't support the guy, monetarily or otherwise, he does not interact with fanfics, I have plans to be very vocal that I'm on Shelby's side no matter what/make it clear that what Will did is wrong, and I don't use his real life events as plots in my stories. At least, I certainly don't try to. It's why I typically change traits about the characters. (I.e. Tommy is shorter, Phil is taller, Techno is bulky, and Wilbur always has golden/hazel eyes.)

I'm aware that it's a tad different because it's rp and not something like a full on book or an actor in a movie, but DSMP has also been over for over two years and the characterizations I make for SBI are not at all based on the CCs. Real life Techno isn't a literal terrorist, Phil ain't a father married to a goddess, Tommy is not a traumatized child soldier, and Wilbur isn't suicidal and blowing up countries.

I think I'll likely focus more on Techno, Tommy, and Phil for a while, but I'm not gonna let one dude ruin a fandom and things I've made for myself. Nothing I write is ever made for Wilbur, as I've seen people saying. Additionally, Wilbur was not the only writer. Technoblade, Philza, TommyInnit, and so many others made that story what it was. Not him.

However, if any CCs come forward saying they don't want their old characters interacting with his, I will respect that.

Though I do think there is a tendency to take real life events (i.e. Techno's cancer, LJ's music, Tommy's real life parents, etc.) and put them into fiction about DSMP. I, however, don't try to do that and have stated before that I don't feel comfortable doing so. The truth is that we have not gotten any genuine SBI content outside of DSMP for years. The dynamic in real life is very different from what was presented in the DSMP. Did personalities still bleed over? Yes, I'm not going to deny that, but I'm not going to act like they're exactly the same between character and person either. We've had that conversation like in 2021, it's why we have C! and CC!.

The rather sad truth is, SBI is what got me really into writing and it's a comfort for me that nothing can compare to. Obviously, I don't think it's appropriate to be writing certain types of stories right now or to be involving characters made by CCs outside of the DSMP. I think it's up to everyone else to decide on what they want to do, however, rushing it also isn't the way to go either. Give yourself time to heal and think it over first instead of throwing away something that gives you comfort and has not been associated with by the creators for over two years.

Anyways, fuck Will Gold. Fuck the fact that he hurt so many people, and fuck that he lied and manipulated his way around the damn internet. ESPECIALLY fuck the fact that he tried to diminish what he did and not take proper accountability.

Go and support Shelby so so much, she and everyone who spoke out really deserve it. I'm glad silence on these types of issues is not being normalized.

Here is a list of (American) resources for DV help:

TNLR

RAINN

WOAR

Love is respect

The Trevor project

Futures without violence

National domestic violence hotline

Resource on what DV and abuse looks like

*Changed it from Harry Potter to Supernatural because Harry Potter is a significantly worse and more problematic franchise, even just within the content of the books. It'd be better left in the dust. I've talked about it before, but it was the first thing that came to my mind at the time and was a poor comparison on my part, I'm truly sorry for that.

[eri-pl]

Silm reread 18: Tears Unnumbered ye shall shed

So, we got here. But first, B&L get an epilogue.

First, a tidbit about reembodiment: B&L take their physical forms again in Doriath. I guess they go from Mandos to there in spirit. (It's all "allegedly", anyway). Everyone is happy and afraid when seing them (very reasonable reaction I think) and Luthien heals Thingol from (depression, more or less).

Melian looks in Luhien's eyes and is sad. She "realized they will be apart till the end of the world and after" (huh?) and again, we have Pengolodh's favorite stylistic tool: "nobody ever suffered more from any loss than Melian suffered then".

Oh, I found the quote in original: “But Melian looked in her eyes and read the doom that was written there, and turned away; for she knew that a parting beyond the end of the world had come between them, and no grief of loss has been heavier than the grief of Melian the Maia in that hour."

B&L go to Ossiriand, it vaguelly feels like they don't neet to eat anymore? But unclear.

Anyway, back to the proper plot Feanorians. Maedhros gained hope, because he saw Morgoth is not untouchable. He starts creating the Union, but the wording about him doing it … even without knowing the story, if I read it carefully, I would probably be worried about how it will go.

And we have a clear reminder of the Oath and all that. Orodreth doesn't trust the Feanorians because C&C (makes sense I guess) (Finrod would probably join the Union but anyway). Gwindor joins Maedhros, going against his king's orders… we know how this will end for Gwindor.

doriath. Mae&co had sent brash letters to thingol along the lines of "you will be our enemy if you don't give the Silmaril back" and Melian advised Thingol to give it to them! But he is angry at their tone and at C&C, and also B&L have suffered so much for this jewel…

Sidenote: If your main claim to a piece of treasure is "but I/someone have sufferred so much", keeping it is probably going to end badly.

Also thingol wants to keep the Silmaril, because it is this jewel's power…. wait what? "And every day that he looked upon the Silmaril the more he desired to keep it for ever; for such was its power." [original] WHAT.

Ok, that is new. So, the Silmaril is canonically addictive? Or is it only because it has been in Morgoth's crown?

So, anyway, Thingol sends Maedhros a dissing answer and Maedhros leaves him be, because the Union is more important. Yay, Maedhros, great job, you are doing well! (For now :((( )

Unfortunately C&C threathen Thingol with genocide, after they win the wart. Which they assume they will. So thingol fortifies and doesn't go to the war. (Mablung and Beleg go, but Thingol allows them reluctantely, so they end up better than Gwindor)

Bór! :) and Ulfang :(

Maedhros plays his hand a bit too early :(

Also, another mention of Morgoth's spies (plural) and traitors. So, I guess the fallen Men, enslaved Elves and shapeshifting wannabe-Saurons sabotage the Union as much as they can.

Battle, Fingon doubtful, problems, suddenly: Turgon! First good surprise of this battle (it will be a whiplash…)

The Noldor want to charge too quickly, but Hurin stops them, because he is wise.

Morgoth wants to kill Fingon especially. Why? Probably to break Maedhros. (Also, revenge for the rescue, maybe.)

Gwindor gets unlucky chance (that's what happens when you go to war against your king's orders, I suppose)

The Noldor get really motivated and almost win. Morgoth is trembling of fear XD as they bang at his door. This is pretty cool of them. But then they all die. :(

Another turn: the Noldor might have won, but Ulfang. :( [Maglor kills him and it's probably the only named character that we are told is killed by Maglor, which is interesting]

Also, Glaurung is there.

Fingon dies. Also, his banner is silver and pale blue, which I did not remember.

Hurin, Turgon, foreshadowing for Earendil. Maeglin hears it all, but does not comment, and he remembers it and I have no idea why the book tells us that, this line feels so odd. "Maeglin, Turgon's sister-son, who stood by, heard these words, and did not forget them; but he said nothing" It's apparently odd to more people because there's a reddit thread about it. huh, ok, makes sense.

So, Hurin is brave and great and I will need to make a post about how the story is an ecosystem and the benefit of one character's heroics sometimes lands to another character's lap and it's painful but also quite real. So. Hurin. But we'll get back to him later.

Morgoth is happy, because divides and betrayal and stuff like that. :/

Also this (Ulfang) is why the Elves don't like Men anymore (except the Edain).

Cirdan is besieged, allo we learn that there are Orcs who can use explosives, and orkish engineers and what not. Interesting. they destroy the ports, Cirdan&co escape to the sea and to Balar.

Turgon again sends ships to Valinor, again it doesn't work (again I suppose he didn't ask Ulmo about his opinion or ignored it), and we are told who kills those sailors: not the Valar. "Only one, Voronwe, was saved by Ulmo from Osse's wrath". So yea, it's the "not rebel, but not not-rebel" sea guy. Don't blame the Valar for this.

Turgon is the rightful king of the Noldor (says the book), Morgoth hates him, because Fingolfin, and because he's a friend of Ulmo, and because Turgon's vibe scares him. We have a wonderful line about how even back in Valinor Morgoth was anxious every time he saw Turgon and tbh this is criminally underexplored in fics (this whole period is) and must have been quite hilarious.

Hurin disses Morgoth, Morgoth curses him and his wife and kids, takes him high up, and curses him again for a good measure.

Results of that: in the next chapter.

[ihavethedreamies]

Within an Inch of Your Life | Shownu [NSFW]

Son Hyunwoo (Shownu - MONSTA X)

Rating: M (18+) MDNI

Word Count: ~4.7k

Pairing: Shownu x AFAB!Reader

Genre: Reader-Insert, Smut, Romance, Some Angst, Very Little Plot, Very Dirty

!!This is smut…if that much isn't clear you should probably leave now!! MDNI!

Warnings: She/Her Pronouns used, Swearing, Kissing, Oral (M! Receiving), Hickeys, Deepthroating, Face-Fucking, Fingering, Pet Names (Pumpkin, Princess, Sweet Girl, etc.), Very Dirty Talk, Unprotected Sex (Use a condom, reader is on the pill in this story)

Author's Note: This is my first fic, holy cow.

Revised (1/31/25) - I forgot to change the name to (Y/N), so I fixed it!

I am cross-posting this on Archive. Please reblog! Share, even if its to the other sites! Let me know if you want to be on the taglist!

You stare at the ceramic up on your bathroom vanity, the cheap blue toothbrush inside it glaring back at you. It is amongst your own teeth cleaning products, mocking you, the bright color stark against the black and white of everything else in the bathroom. Even your own toothbrush is black. Reaching out, you place your own that you just finished using in the cup and grab the blue one. Staring down at it, you aren’t sure how to feel. It had been a few weeks since it was last used, and it never would be again. You blink at it, then sigh, leaving the bathroom and stop next to the trash can right outside the door near the kitchen. Your foot rests on the paddle to open the lid, and you take a deep breath, pressing down as you exhale. Your hand holding the toothbrush lingers over the gaping bin. Swallowing a lump in your throat you don’t expect to be there, you grip the brush tighter. Emotion whelms in you, but you can’t pinpoint what kind. Anger? Guilt? Sadness? Fuck it. You harshly throw the brush in the can and let the lid slam closed as your foot leaves the pedal.

“What’s with the aggression?” Yuna calls out to you from the other side of the apartment where she’s on your couch. She’s rubbing sleep from her eyes as she sits up from her sleeping perch.

“Don’t worry about it.” You still stare at the trash can, now closed. You hear her bare feet on the hardwood floor as she comes up to you. She blows her nose into a napkin she grabbed from the counter behind the can, and you step out of the way to let her throw away the used paper.

“Oh.” Realization hits your friend, seeing the toothbrush, which is the only thing in there. You move away and into the kitchen to get your coffee ready as she takes a place on a stool at the counter.

“What even happened?”

“What do you mean?”

“Why did you two break up?” she asks, and you exhale. Grabbing a coffee mug, you put the cup on the perch of your coffee maker and press the largest button. You don’t answer.

“What he bad in bed or something?”

“No.”

“Did he cheat on you?”

“No.”

“Controlling? Possessive?”

“No. Not really.”

“Then why? You don’t seem all that torn up about it.”

“It’s a bit of a relief…”

“A relief? Why?”

“I… I was pity dating him.”

“WHAT?!”

“Calm down. He had been in love with me for years, and I felt bad for turning him down so many times… Also, I was… frustrated without Younghoon being here…”

“So not only was he a rebound, you used him? That’s harsh.”

“Look, he wouldn’t leave me alone, kept asking me out, getting me things. Might as well make it easier and say yes…”

“So…why did you break it off then?”

“I didn’t.”

“He broke up with you?”

“Yeah.”

“Why?”

“I told him.”

“Told him what?”

“That I was pity-dating him…”

“Fuck. That must’ve been rough.”

“Yeah.” You stare down at the swirling liquid in your cup, spoon halting its stirring.

“I felt so guilty I have to come clean.” You rest back against the counter, crossing your arms, somewhat hugging yourself.

“Why? Why not just break up with him? You had to tell him?”

“Yes.”

“What made you do that?”

“Because…” your words get caught in your throat, the truth hitting you hard now that you had to speak it out loud, “b-because I can’t lie… to those I love.” Your voice cracks from the emotions barreling you over, and Yuna’s face softens.

“You fell in love with him…”

“Y-yeah.”

“Then why not stay in the relationship?”

“I don’t want a real relationship with him built on a lie. I had to come clean.” You stand up straight, ignoring your coffee, and go to sit on your bed. You bury your face in your hands, throat catching as you swallow, your eyes burning.

“Oh, girlie…” Yuna follows you, sitting on your bed next to you, and pulls you into a hug.

“I’m such a horrible fucking person.” You start to sob as she rubs your back.

“I love him. I do. I was in denial. It hit me so suddenly and so hard… I think I must’ve felt that way longer than I really realized. God…I’m such a bitch.” You cry as she holds you. Her phone alarm goes off as your crying subsists and she goes to answer it.

“Shit. I have to get to class. I’ll message you later.” She kisses your forehead and gathers her stuff, leaving your apartment. Your cooling drink remains on the counter as you curl back up into bed, soon falling asleep.

~θωθ~

“(Y/N)!” Yuna slams her palm on the door, ringing the bell a few more times. She knows you’re home, she can see your bag and keys on the table through the window. You haven’t answered her calls or texts for three days and won’t open the door either.

“Yuna?” A man’s voice catches her attention, and she turns to see Hyunwoo coming up the stairs to get to the second-floor apartment.

“Hyunwoo? What are you doing here?” She quiets her voice, not sure how you might react if you hear them. She knows your recent lack of activity was due to the breakup, and your realization of your feelings for the man.

“I was going to get my stuff and leave my key…” His voice is noticeably flat, and the woman can’t read his expression.

“You have a key? You have a key!” Your friend lunges forward, snagging the set of keys from his hands. She shoves the metal into the lock and opens the door.

“(Y/N)!” she shouts, storming in.

~o3o~

You bury deeper into your pillows and sheets as Yuna bangs on your door. You don’t want to see anyone, not even her. You feel you don’t deserve her comfort. You are a shitty person who did a shitty thing. You flinch when you hear a key in the lock, wondering who the hell was there. Yuna doesn’t have a key, and only your uncle does as the landlord. You had given the spare key to your ex…to Hyunwoo.

“(Y/N)!” The other woman’s harsh shout breaks the silence you have been dwelling in. You hope your uncle was there too, who else would be able to let her in? You get jarred to attention as your friend yanks your comforter off you and the bed.

“What?” you snap, and she climbs onto the bed, flipping you over to force you to sit up.

“You bitch, you left me on read!” She puts you into a playful headlock and ruffles your unkempt hair. You had showered, but a hairbrush? Who is she? You shove Yuna off, and she gets off the bed, stomping away. When she comes back, you hear another set of footsteps along with hers, too heavy to even be your uncle.

“The only way you’re going to get over this pity party you threw yourself is by telling the truth!” Yuna snaps, yanking your now ex-boyfriend into view past the half wall that separates your sleeping area from the living room. He stands there, staring at you; you won’t meet his gaze. Yuna moves into the kitchen, looking in the fridge and hastily writing stuff down on your grocery list pad.

“I am going to buy you food, you two better talk!” She points at you sternly, at him, and then leaves. You are left in silence with him.

“W-why are you here?” Your voice is scratchy, mouth dry.

“Came to get my stuff…” He nods toward the dresser drawer where his stuff still is.

“Ah.” You lick your chapped lips. You haven’t drunk or eaten much in the last three days, and he could tell; he knew you too well. He leaves your direct line of sight and went to retrieve a bottle of water from your fridge. Coming back, he juts it into your face. You take it, not meeting his eyes. Your small sips turn into big gulps, the cool liquid a sweet relief.

“What was Yuna talking about? You telling me the truth?” Luckily you swallow before he asks, because otherwise you would’ve choked. Closing the bottle, you throw it further up your bed, heaving your legs up onto the mattress, knees touching your chest. You wrap your arms around your knees and chew on your thumbnail, not knowing how to start.

“You wanna tell me why you broke my heart?” His tone is harsh, a tinge of sadness laced through it. Your breath catches, the stinging in your eyes coming back.

“It would’ve hurt less if you just broke up with me. But telling me you only dated me out of pity? I love you; I have for years-“

“I had to tell you.”

“Why?”

“I couldn’t keep lying.”

“Why not? You had been doing it for nearly seven months.” His voice is sharp with anger.

“I-I can’t…” you swallow a lump in your throat, fighting your quivering lip, “I can’t lie to…to someone I love.”

You weren’t sure what his reaction is because you don’t look up at him.

“What?”

“I couldn’t keep lying to you… I love you-“ You don’t get the chance to work up the courage to look up at him, his hands quickly going to your jaw, hauling you close and up out of the bed. His lips find yours and the kiss is different from any before, you can feel how strong his emotions are. He’s rough, domineering, barely letting you breathe. His tongue wraps around yours, sucking on it, sucking you into him even more than you already are. The man is practically bent over you, being nearly a foot taller that you, forcing your head to tip back far to make up for the rest of the distance. You whine, hands gripping his shirt from under his jacket, and he swallows every little noise you make. As he pulls away, he bites your bottom lip, the tang of blood hitting your tongue. He steps back abruptly, running his hands through his hair.

“Fuck. D-don’t…Don’t play with me.” He shakes his head, and you stumble back to sit on your bed.

“I’m not. I didn’t…I only realized a few days ago how I really felt… How I still feel.”

“What am I supposed to do with this, huh?” He paces a bit, roughing his hair up further.

“Do whatever you want… I-I’m okay with whatever you decide…” You drift off, not sure what you want him to really do. You want him to kiss you again, but you feel you deserve him leaving and never talking to you again. You feel he should break your heart, like you did his.

“Part of me wants to walk out of here, and never think about you again.” He finally gets out and the words pierce you hard, a tear rolling down your cheek.

“Another part of me wants to give you another chance…” You close your eyes, willing the rest of your tears back.

“But there’s something else I really, really want to do.” You hear him get closer but refuse to look at him. You gasp as his fingers weave into the hair at the back of your head, tugging your head back so you look up at him.

“…what?” His lips are so close to yours, but they don’t meet, and his tongue doesn’t taste yours. He instead leans down to whisper in your ear…

“I’m going to fuck you within an inch of your life.” You gasp at his words, then find yourself briefly in the air as he tosses you back on the bed. Hyunwoo tears his jacket off and finally brings his lips back to yours. A strong thigh jams between your legs, rubbing against your core, covered only by your thin sleep shorts. His large hand runs down your thigh, hitching it up to his side and he grinds his hardening cock down against you.

“Fuck-!” You whimper as he pulls away from the kiss, a trail of saliva connecting your lips. He stares at you intensely till he dips back down, latching onto the weak point of your neck right under your jaw, almost at your throat. He sucks hard then bites at the flesh, making you shiver as you lay there and let him do whatever. You want everything he’ll give you. The man leaves scathing kisses, sucking bruises onto your skin: at your neck, shoulders -and once your shirt is off- your chest, breasts, ribs, stomach, avoiding anything covered by your tiny shorts, giving more marks on your inner thighs. Your skin is on fire, and you’ve never felt so close to cumming before from just this kind of stimulation, but you’re frighteningly close.

Hyunwoo sits back on his knees, pulling his t-shirt over his head, and you are immediately enthralled. Your type is usually pretty boys with a dancer’s body; nothing like him. He was devastatingly handsome and while you normally wouldn’t care for the taught pecs, ridged abs and sharp v-line of his hips… He truly does look like sex incarnate, kneeling over you.

You want to sit up, reach for his belt, pull his pants down and have him fuck your throat, but he’s in control, entirely. You aren’t exactly a dominant lover, never even really a switch, but you were ready to give up full control to him. Your mouth waters at the sight of him shirtless for the first time, your romantic feelings fueling your sexual desire. He undoes his belt and removes his jeans, his hard cock tenting his boxer briefs. Was he always that big?

“Something wrong, pretty girl?” You can hear the smirk in his voice, not looking away from his covered dick. Due to your previous feelings, or lack-there-of, you never really have him a good look; he was just your brother’s stupid friend. Right now, though, you’re getting a really, really good look in.

“Y-you, uh…” Your mother was literally watering…

“Wanna taste?” He grips himself over the fabric and you nod quickly, causing him to huff in amusement. Despite the fact you love a dick in your mouth, you had never done it with him; didn’t let yourself, lest you get hooked. He motions with his head for you to get closer and you crawl across the bed to where he stands at the foot of it. The bed is the perfect height to allow your face to be perfectly level with his cock. You let out a whimper and he tilts his head, watching you in amusement. With shaky hands, you reach for the waistband of his boxers and carefully pull them off. You nearly start drooling as he’s revealed to you.

“Fuck~” You exhale, watching his dick bob in the air as he steps out of his final garment. Wiggling your jaw back and forth, you thank the stars that you no longer have a gag reflex, due to various different…experiences. Looking over him, you can’t believe that he had been inside you before; it made you wonder if your stomach bulged from his girth.

“You just gonna stare?” He steps closer and you scooch the little bit closer your need to, wrapping your lips around the head of his cock. Hyunwoo exhales in relief and you groan at his taste. You roll your tongue around him like a popsicle, making him tip his head back with a sigh. Not going any further than the tip, you suck hard, then pull back. This makes him bury his fingers into your hair to prevent you from going anywhere.

“What-?” He tilts your head back to look up at his face.

“Fuck me. My mouth…down my throat~” You bite your lip, and he blinks in shock before a devious smirk breaks out on his handsome face.

“Really? You sure?”

“Please, pleasepleaseplease-“ You open your mouth as wide as you can, and he slowly thrusts his dick into your mouth. The deeper he goes, the more saliva builds up in your mouth, literally dripping from your lips. His cock reaches the back of your throat, and he moves to pull back his hips, but you stop him when your hands fly to his thighs, pulling him closer and further into your mouth.

“Fucking hell, (Y/N).” His voice has a hint of a whine to it. He’s the perfect length, your nose hitting his pelvis as his cock buries in your throat, but not too deep; you would still be able to breathe when he pulls back. You feel your cunt clench, aching to be filled as well. You shuffle, splaying your knees more to lower yourself, angling his cock in your mouth just wright. You look up at him expectantly and he practically growls, beginning to thrust into your mouth. Tears spring to your eyes and you aren’t sure if it was from what he’s doing or the fact that it’s happening at all. Drool was dripping down your chin, tears down your cheeks, and wet from your cunt. You wouldn’t be surprised if when he cums -down your throat preferably- that you would as well. His thrusts pick up some, getting shallower as his grip pulls at your scalp. The slight sting from your hair, the fat head of his cock battering your throat, and the taste of his precum is quickly sending you into overdrive. You’re not usually one for sado-masochism or bondage, but a little pain can be nice. In the back of his mind, Hyunwoo marvels at the fact that you haven’t gagged yet, but he’s much too focused on the wet vacuum of your mouth to think about it too much. The sight of your lips swallowing his swollen cock over and over is orgasmic in itself, but the look in your eyes is what sent him over the edge. They’re glazed over in pleasure; you already look so fucked out.

“(Y/N), can I come inside?” He grunts out and you moan, wanting nothing more.

“Ah, fuck-“ His hips stutter and you feel his hot, thick cum start to flow down your throat. He’s so deep you almost can’t taste his release, which…Just. Kept. Going. You swallow what seems like over and over to get it all down before he was even done.

Hyunwoo pulls out slowly, his cock still half-hard as you catch your breath, finally getting a normal amount of air. Your core’s quivering and you know you came as well from the amount of wetness stuck to the fabric of your shorts, that, and your head was still swimming.

“Oh, pretty girl~” He shakes his head, breathing hard himself. You peer up at him with a dazed look and he has never seen you quite like that. He had seen you close, once, but now your true submissive nature is blooming forth. He knows you’d let him do anything he wants, and man there’s a lot he wants to do to you. He had promised to fuck you within an inch of your life, and he’s going to make good on it.

“What do you want me to do to you now, sweetheart?”

“Anything~” You whine, and he groans, before remembering something. While you had never said it before, he knows you have a thing for hands. You’d told him once he’s not allowed to wear rings because it made his fingers look too good. He wonders how easily you could fall apart on his fingers…how many times he could make you cum tonight.

“You still on the pill?”

“Yea.”

“Good.” He didn’t bring any condoms, not thinking anything was going to happen when he left his apartment this morning.

“Scoot up.” He runs the back of his finger over your cheek, still damp from tears and you scurry up the mattress. You lie back as he climbs over you; watching you watch his hand move to your core. He raises an eyebrow as he strokes over the fabric of your shorts. You always tend to get very wet very easily, but this was much more than usual.

“Did you cum~?” Hyunwoo asks and you nod sheepishly.

“Oh, my god.” He dives in, latching onto your lips, not caring that you’d just sucked him dry. Your teeth clack against his from the messy kiss. His kisses move from your mouth, down your neck, and he settles on your throat again. You’re already littered with hickeys, but he wants to leave more. As he marks you further, he pulls your shorts off roughly, a slight ripping noise coming from the seams. He tosses the last piece of your clothing away; you never sleep with underwear on. Finally, his fingers touch your bare pussy, making you whine.

“Damn, (Y/N)~” He chuckles, burying two fingers into your hot cunt, his thumb finding your swollen clit. You release a long, shaky moan, clenching around his fingers as he finds your weak spot quickly, forcing your hips to tilt up as your back arches. You want desperately for him pull his fingers out and fuck you with his delicious cock already, but you refuse to say anything. This was for him; he can do whatever he wants to you, and you would thank him for it. How had you not realized sooner that this man is the sexiest one on the face of the earth? The pads of his fingers rub against your g-spot in just the right way, and it’s driving you crazy. His fingers move separately; the way they curl and thrust making the sensations unpredictable. He adds a third and spreads them, getting you ready for his huge cock. You feel the strength in his hands, his knuckles rubbing against your walls, and his palm grinding against your clit.

“H-Hyunwoo-!” Your hands land on his chest, your nails digging into the skin, your release building faster than either of you expect.

“Cum for me, sweet girl.” And you do. The breath is knocked out of your lungs, flashes of white dotting your vision. You hear him chuckle, but it sounds like he’s far in the distance, rumbling through the air and cutting through the ringing in your ears. When you come down from your high, your vision sharpens, and you see him smiling down at you. He leans closer, bumping his nose against yours, touching his forehead to yours.

“I love you.” He whispers, and your breath hitches, nearly ready to cry as you reach up to cup his jaw. Your thumbs stroke the arch of his cheekbones.

“I love you, too~” He kisses you softly, his fingers leaving your pussy. His hands cup your thighs, hitching them up to wrap around his waist. You pull back from the kiss with a gasp as he strokes his cock against your cunt, fully hard again. Hyunwoo knows he’s teasing you, rutting against you like that, covering his dick in your wetness but refusing to enter you.

“Please, please, please-“ You begin to beg; you aren’t even close to being ashamed about it either. You need him inside of you, rearranging your insides, carving himself into you, ruining you for anyone else. His hands come up to yours, still on his cheeks, wrapping his fingers around yours, then pin them up by your head. With great dexterity, he shifts his hips and began to slip inside you, still holding your hands. His lips hover over yours, not quite meeting, your mouth hangs open in a silent moan as he splits you in half. Not only has it been a while since you two had sex; you hadn’t gotten yourself off either. No fingers, no vibrator, nothing. Hyunwoo groans as he settles deep inside of you, the head of his cock touching your cervix, your walls gripping him tighter than they ever have before. Your legs hold him close, ankles linked; it seems your body refuses to let him go. He just sits inside of you for a bit, giving you small kisses and lets your walls get used to the stretch. His cock’s so deep, it feels like he’s in your throat, and the delicious burn of the stretch is addicting. It never had felt this good before, and you used to think the idea sex feels better the more you love the person was bullshit. No. You’re in euphoria and he hasn’t even moved yet.

“Can I move?” he asks, resting his forehead on your collarbone. He really just wants to fuck you into the mattress, but he wants this to last as long as possible.

“Yes-“ you gasp out, preparing for him to knock loose a kidney, but he barely pulls out and then slowly thrusts back in, grinding his pelvis into yours. Even this slight movement knocks the wind out of you. The next thrust is a bit faster, but just as shallow and his breath mixes with yours as he hovers over you. Not pulling out any further, his hips pump hard, and you throw your head back. Hyunwoo moves his hands from holding yours to wrapping one around your wrists so his free hand can move to your back, then shifts you some. With your legs still wrapped around his waist, when he sits up on his knees more, your butt leaves the bed; he’s man-handled you into a near mating press. Somehow, he gets deeper and you if it’s a thing, that your cervix was going to get bruised.

“I don’t think I can hold back…” He grunts; his eyes closing in concentration. What the hell are you in for? You’d never been taken quite like this before, by anyone, least of all him; you ‘made love’. This though, you’re in for him fucking you stupid, like he promised.

“Do what you want~” You plea; he’d stopped moving and you desperately need him to keep going.

“You have anywhere to be the next few days?”

“No?”

“Good, because I don’t want you to be able to walk when I’m done with you~” He gives you a devious smirk, pulling away, resting back on his heels. His strong hands dig into the flesh of your thighs where they rest at his sides, holding him to you. You let him move them and exhale harshly as her forces your knees to your ears, completely and easily folding you in half. Still not moving his hips, he leans down so he can speak right into your ear.

“That pill better work good because I’m going to pump you full of my cum.” He thrusts, hard, and if your breath didn’t leave your lungs, you’d scream a moan. It’s not a shallow hard thrust like before, no; he pulls out nearly all the way before slamming back in. You can even tell how tight your walls are clenching him, desperately trying to hold him in. You’re not able to tell what part of you wants him more -your psyche, your heart, or your cunt- you just know you don’t want him to ever stop.

“Hyunwoo-!” You aren’t sure if you can say anything but his name already, but his next thrust stops all thoughts.

“I want my hand shape to be bruised into your skin-“ He clenches your thighs under your knees tight.

Another thrust.

“I want to brand you with the feeling of my cock in your cunt so only I can every satisfy you.

Thrust.

“I want to fuck you on every surface of this apartment.” As he recites every filthy desire he has right into your ear, he pounds his fat cock so hard into you, you think he might just split you in half.

“I want to paint your skin with my cum and then fill you back up again in shower.”

Thrust.

“I want to fill every part of you that I can: your pussy, your womb, your mouth, your throat, and, if you let me, I’ll even bury my cock in your ass and paint you white there too.”

Thrust.

Your head swims with each word. He was always so sweet and soft before now, but this was different, he had turned into an animal, and he’s determined to fuck you like one.

Thrust.

“I’ll do it all, everything I want, and I promise, I will fuck you within an inch of your life.”

Master-Master List

[trainsinanime]

I'm still considering whether I'll do any non-vague posting about this, but let me just say: Writing long and erudite posts about what you think is wrong with a French children's TV show does not absolve you from the accusation that you're doing… let's call it entry-level analysis. A post can be long and well-written and still just regurgitate the most basic, boring points, and some of them plainly wrong.

Actually maybe don't read this, it may be too salty itself.

"Adrien is sometimes too pushy", "Marinette is sometimes a stalker", "Alya is a bad friend because she's unwilling to bully a random new girl just because Marinette said so", yeah, yeah, we've heard it. More than once. Way more than once. Yes, even with receipts and quotes. Trust me, it's been discussed. These are the kind of standard hot takes of someone who is doing their first attempt at critical analysis, and I actually think on some level we should encourage that. I do believe fandom should be beginner-friendly in all regards.

But man, it can be annoying to read sometimes. Especially when someone uses these hot takes to justify the existence of salt fics. Let me be 100% clear here: Salt fics are not a reaction to flaws in the source material. Salt fics are materially different from fix-it fics. This becomes more clear when you track these patterns over fandoms, and in particular look at my favourite example over in Fairy Tail (sic).

That fandom has a number of fandom-specific plots, like some "angel of death sends main character back to relive the origins with the knowledge they had later" (also very popular in Harry Potter back in the day), but also one that is just 100% salt specific: It's about Lisanna, a childhood friend of the male lead Natsu, coming back from the alternate universe she was trapped in, and displacing Lucy, the female lead, who eventually leaves, sad and depressed, while nobody cares about her. The sentiments are all the same: Feeling depressed, feeling annoyed that your friends are suddenly interested in the new girl, feeling like you don't belong anymore, leaving your friend group to punish them and so on.

There are some differences as well. This whole thing was back in the days of Fanfiction.net, when crossovers were in a whole other section of the site and thus not easily findable, so the whole "…I'm going to run away to somewhere where people want me" never had the frankly hilarious addition of "…and when I'm there I'm going to marry Batman!", which spawned a whole sub-fandom in ML (its fans tell me that it's not all salt; I haven't bothered to check).

But the most important difference: The inciting incident never happened in canon. People just thought it might. In canon, Lisanna did return from her alternate dimension… and then immediately became a forgotten background character. Lucy and Natsu remained just as in love as they always had been, which is to say, very much except they don't seem to notice it. Their relationship was never strained even for a moment.

And still people wrote these stories that are functionally salt fics, with the same storylines, same emotions, same beats. Because salt fics are not about fixing what is wrong with the show. If they were, they'd spend all their time discussing the terribly fucked-up metro map. Salt fics are about exploring feelings of loneliness, isolation, "why are you hanging out with here when I told you she sucks" and just pure spite, in a way that you don't really see outside of pop songs. That is the end goal. The characters and plots are just a way to get there, and they will get twisted as necessary.

This is critical for understanding and discussing the phenomenon of salt fics. Alya is not actually getting demonised because she acted a bit stupid in one episode where everybody but Marinette acted a bit stupid. It's incredibly weird to hear this argument, and then all the supporting quotes for it, in the same post, right underneath, are all:

Alya: Okay, but do you have any proof? Marinette (angrily): Arrghlwargl! No!

Like, come on. Alya is getting demonised because people really want to. Because it works for the kind of story. These stories assume that it's Alya's job to always support Marinette unconditionally, and that any deviation from that, no matter how minor, is a highest order betrayal. And then they go full Count of Monte Cristo on her.

(Well, not really, that could almost be fun. Nobody ever has Marinette imprisoned for fourteen years, get out with the help of a hypnotist monk, use a buried pirate treasure to buy an island, then manipulate a telegraph line to… It's all just torn notebooks and such. Boring.)

The idea that people hate Alya for mostly valid reasons is just plain wrong and shows that you've missed a huge part of what's happening in the fandom. You could use all the Alya hate as an entry point into analysing what her role is in the show, how people in the fandom perceive her role, how people in the salt dom perceive her role, how her role and her personality shift depending on the needs of an episode at the expense of a consistent character and so on. There is some great analysis in that direction out there already, but more wouldn't hurt. "Alya is a bad friend sometimes because of Chameleon" remains an uninteresting take no matter how well you word it, though.

And that's just Alya. Adrien hate, for example, is its entirely own field. In short: Yes, some characters in this fandom are over-hated. Try digging deeper next time.

[forerussake]

Many-Coated Mayhem #3

In the wake of coat post #1 and #2 I promised I had more still, and I do, because lo and behold: Wu Xie is not the only one in TSF who wears nice coats. There are SO MANY nice coats in this show. Here's some of my personal favourites:

Coat 24

I've mentioned her before! One of the most glorious coats in this many-coated show: Pangzi's floofy, leather-and-fur wintercoat. He starts wearing this at the Retreat in episode 9, and he wears it for some time after that.

It's beautiful and amazing and gorgeous and it looks spectacular on him, and I WANT IT. (Or maybe I just want him to hug me?)

Coat 25

This is the robey coaty situation Xiaoge wears in the flashbacks of him visiting the Yinshaluo Shrine in episodes 20-21. It has furr lining the hood, and nice patches on the elbows and a red belt/sash to secure it around his waist.

It looks soft in a way his modern-day attire rarely does and it's an allround LOOK. Especially when paired with his fingerless gloves.

Coat 26

It's Yinshaluo and Second Bronze Door trip winter coat time!

First up: Zhang Haike. I grabbed this shot from episode 31, when he goes to the Spiritual Retreat to take on the position of Deren, because most of the other scenes it appears in were either too dark, too muted in colour, too snowy, or too fast-paced to get a decent screenshot at 720p, and maybe also because I only decided to include it at all when I realized by the end that I had nothing yet for ZHK for this post and I thought that was a little bit sad. He does have nice fashion, but rarely did this show allow me to screenshot it.

Anyway, it's grey and darker grey, and it's exactly the kind of coat you'd expect this brooding old man to wear on his secret missions into the mountains.

Coat 27

Zhang Haixing's white wintercoat! It's a white wintercoat. It looks good on her. She's ready to go skiing with the girls. Idk what else to say about it. It has furr and pockets!

She manages to keep it clean for a surprisingly long time... until she doesn't anymore.

Coat 28

THE MOMENT WE HAVE ALL BEEN WAITING FOR! It's Feng's incredibly in character and on point bright orange wintercoat. Just look at it, isn't it amazing? (See also ZHK in the only other clear shot I managed to get of his grey coat.)

Anyway, Feng's fashion sense has been on point for the whole show, and he proves it again by pairing this orange monstrosity with a babyblue jumpsuit, which you can see here as he is standing there thinking 'well, damn, if it isn't the consequences to my own actions...' Can you tell I have come to love him deeply as the show went on?

Feng is also clearly the only person in this godforsaken party who wants to be saved should an avalanche occur, wearing a bright colour that will not camouflage him right into the backdrop of the mountain, a strategy that is almost undone in the first episode that all of these coats appear in, when they collectively decide to take them all off.

So, kids, what have we learned from episode 21? Keep your plot-relevant coats on!

Coat 29

This is baby!Zhang Haixing's incredible blue trenchcoat. She wears this in the sad flashback in episode 27.

Look, I don't have anything to say about this other than OMG LOOK AT HER SHE IS SO PRETTY. It deserves to be said okay.

"Coat" 30

Speaking of pretty, remember how I said I love Feng? Because I love him. He is ridiculous, a surprisingly compelling character despite also being this DMBJ installment's #1 resident white guy, and a walking model. Which brings me to: his blue robes from episode 28 at the Yinshaluo village.

"But Eru," you say, "none of these shots actually show his outfit." And yeah, I couldn't get a good shot of it, sorry, but it looks good okay. Trust me. These pictures of him being stupidly pretty and apparently a horse-whisperer will just have to suffice.

Coat 31

This is ridiculous leather coat Zhang Haixing wears when she goes to visit her big brother at the Spiritual Retreat in episode 31.

This monstrosity with its straps and lines and incredibly not functional off-the-shoulder slab of furr should not be allowed to look good on anyone and yet somehow she makes it work. Kudos ma'am. Also I am so sorry that your brother didn't hug you. He should've fucking hugged you, the absolute bastard. You deserved that much from him. Alas it wasn't meant to be.

Coat 32

Now we are getting towards the end. I've shown you in coat post #1 what Wu Xie wears on the trip to Yucun in episode 32. Now it's Pangzi's turn:

He wears something that is maybe technically also a shirt, but it's got a green pattern and I don't care I just wanted you to see him once more. Look at him. Isn't your heart healed now? I thought as much.

Coat 33

Xiaoge's Blue Coat™️ Is it really THE blue coat? Is this the one Wu Xie nabs off the statue and wears in a thematically meaningful way for a couple episodes? Is it THE blue coat returned to its rightful owner??? I don't know. The show doesn't allow me to look at it too closely. But it may well be.

I'm choosing to interpret it as such. If you want a closer look: see the final screenshot in this post, and decide for yourself.

Coat 34

Another Xiaoge coat. This the black one he wears on the mountain hike where they find the fisherman, and also when he steals a chicken from their poor neighbour. Oopsie.

Is it a coat? Is it a vest? Does it really matter? He looks soft and warm and happy, and isn't that all we ever wanted for him? The black is a nice return to his roots, though I personally have LOVED the visual shift to blue as his primary coat colour since Reboot came out.

I know for a fact he wears multiple different blue coats during the show, and maybe one day I will piece together another post in which I try to figure out how many different blue Xiaoge coats show up in this show.

For now though, I am leaving you with the Iron Triangle in Yucun, alive and happy and together. Who knows what (coats) the future still has in stall for them? (Sssst, don't tell them yet.)

[be-missed]

Call Me Babe For The Weekend (MDNI)

Vada Cavell X Fem!Reader

(picture not mine)

Summary: If only a high school reunion party is the reason Vada got to see you again, then so be it. Fuck her work commitments, fuck that blind date, and fuck the traffic lights. MDNI

Warning: curse words, smut minors dni. Story happens after college, so like Vada is older and have a job, so as Reader. So probably a slight ooc Vada and a slight twist in the original plot. Hate sex and like sligt angst. Cheating.

A/N: First time I will be writing for Vada. This won the poll so here you go.

words: 2.1K

Masterlist

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Everybody in the room clapped as Y/N finishes her performance on stage, some loud whistles from boys who aren't still married and have a child to support has been heard, while some other girls talk on how Y/N still has the talent that she have during high school, while there is Vada, just staring and reminiscing about the times that she get to see Y/N practice and jut watch her and be awed about Y/N's talent.

A slap on her arm gets to pop her own bubble "Now stop day dreaming and go to her" her friend Nick told her as she rubs the slapped area of her arm "Ouch? And why would I need to talk to her, she fucking hates me anyway" Vada said in return still following where Y/N went.

"Okay, she hates you, but you need to remember that she also loved you, like a lot lot" Nicki told the other girl "Please just fucking go to her, because I can't stand seeing you undress her in your own mind" Nicki exclaimed, begging her friend to just talk to Y/N.

"What will I tell her then? I don't want to start a small talk, she'll just probably not entertain me" Vada said with a sadness remembering how she messaged and texted Y/N when they broke up, or how she went to her house every time just for her to talk to Y/N. Well they didn't technically broke up, Vada thought, since Y/N just left after the last school year without even saying good bye to the other girl.

"Get a grip, please just talk to her. She's grown and I think she forgave you. Just talk to her, you deserve a closure." Nicki said and tapped her for some support, "Well here goes nothing" Vada said, getting up from her seat and walking to your side at the bar.

While walking, in every step that Vada take, she kept on thinking on what to say to you, how will you react, what will you do. Vada thought if you will just follow the lines that you said inside her head, everything will be just easy, but that's not the case.

"Still got that shiny necklace on your neck, I see" Vada started the conversation. Silence, Y/N is just looking at the bottles in front of them, drinking her sour whiskey. "Please, just talk me" Vada said with a small voice, looking at Y/N's face. They might not talk, or see each other but Vada for sure stalks every social media account that Y/N have just to know if you are doing well and if you happy. To Vada, well, you looked happier than you were, carefree even.

Vada got pulled out of her bubble when she was now staring in your eyes and said "There's nothing to talk about" and that earned Vada a chuckle and said, "Come on, really? Nothing to talk about? You left me, without any indication and now I get to see you after years and you're gonna say that we have nothing to talk about?"

Y/n lets out a deep sigh "Look, I'm not here to talk to you, I'm here to see my old friends and have fun. Interacting with you is not on my list tonight, so please, I am respectfully asking if you could fuck off" Y/N ended and started to get up from her seat and started to walk to go to the restroom.

Vada follows closely and said "Well I don't care about your list. I just want to talk to you and clear things out" Y/N then fasten her phase "Y/N please, just, can you" Out of breath, Vada is still trying to follow Y/N. Why are your steps so big? Vada thought.

"Where the fuck is the rest room" y/N exclaimed trying to find the rest room. A grip on her forearm stopped her from pacing around "Please Y/N, fucking hell Y/N, can we please just talk, I am begging here" Vada exclaimed, "And again, there's nothing to talk to Vada, so just fuck off" Y/N exclaimed trying to get her arm off from Vada's hold "Get off of me" Y/N said.

"Nope, not until you decide to talk to me" Vada said with a wide smirk knowing that she is much stronger than you.

Huffing, Y/N said "Okay, fine what do you want to talk about?" and Vada answered "Why did you leave me? You didn't talk to me for weeks and you didn't tell me you were leaving" and now, that statement made Y/N chuckle.

"Really Vada? That's your question?" Y/N said while looking a Vada's face realizing that Vada is not joking and that was her real question, "Are you really joking right now? You are asking me why I left you?" Y/N said while Vada just nodded.

"Wow, well for starters, you neglected me for 2 whole months, you hand out with Maddie more than me, You kissed her, and lastly you fucked her, while we were in a relationship" Y/N exclaimed, "So now Vada, tell me, was that not a good reason to fucking dump your ass and leave you?"

The grip on Y/N's arm loosen and she got her arms back.

"That was, I told you, I didn't do it in purpose, I was grieving, I didn't know what I was doing, please, just I told you right? After that day happened, everything for me was different. And she was the one I was with..." Vada said.

But Y/N wasn't taking any of her reason and said "I know Vada, that is why I was trying my best to be involved in your life more and be a supportive girlfriend, but you fucking kicked me out and closed yourself to me. I have given my best part to you Vada, I have given everything but you just shut me out and let that girl comfort you. It should've been me Vada, it should've been me that you chose to fucking go through things. Now tell me if that's not enough reasons."

Now a tear stained face is what Vada is looking at. But deep inside Y/N's heart, she had forgiven Vada a long time ago, she just carry that hurt with her. She might not be suck a the restaurant but she surely checks every new things that is going on in there.

Leaving town, the school, and Vada that day was the most hardest and painful thing that Y/N did in her entire life. Her mom said that it was for the best, since the more you give, Vada wanted you less. Because sometimes giving up and running away is the right thing and the most bravest thing that a person can do.

Y/N got still love for Vada, she knows it in herself, but it is exactly hard to trust Vada back again.

Y/N was now leaning back to the lockers while Vada closed the space between them and buried her face into Y/N's neck.

"I'm sorry, I know. I'm sorry" Those were the words that Vada kept on saying. "Let me make it up to you please" Vada whispered in your neck.

Y/N badly wants to push Vada away, her mind kept on saying no, but her body acts on the opposite side, "fuck" Y/N thought.

"You don't need to forgive me right now, but please give me a chance" Vada's hands were now situated on Y/N's side, squeezing and massaging Y/N's waist.

"Vada..." Y/N said, voice faltering as Vada started to drop light kisses on her neck, "Tell me if you want to me to stop" Vada said as she climbs her kisses up to Y/N's face.

Y/N and Vada are now looking at each other's eye, testing the waters Vada lean in, and just like a jack in the box, it surprised her when Y/N also leaned in to kiss her.

Vada was trying to get the upper hand by tilting her head to deepen the kiss, yet Y/N's hand was now on her nape trying to pull her away. Vada thought if Y/N will try to tease her then she will do things her way. So Vada's free hand travelled from Y/N's waist to her ass, squeezing it real hard, making Y/N gasp.

Vada then travels her kisses again down to Y/N's neck with her other hand making its way under Y/N's dress, squeezing and sliding her fingertips along Y/N's thigh that made the other girl squirm.

"Tell me to stop Y/N" Vada challengingly said to Y/N who got her head rested in the lockers with her eyes closed, with heavy breathing she said "Just fuck me already."

Vada wouldn't just fuck Y/N in the hallway, leaning into the locker, of course she would tease the other girl until she begs.

Vada then slid her fingers through Y/N's underwear, into the slit that's now forming a wet patch, "Getting wet are we?" Vada said with a smirk on her face, Y/N squirms and squirms trying to get Vada's finger to hit her spot.

"Just please, put a finger inside me already" Y/N said while squeezing Vada's biceps, and anchors one of her feet to Vada's hips that made the other girl closer to her.

Vada pulls Y/N's underwear to the side, and the moment that Vada's fingertips got in contact with her wet slit, Y/N stifles a moan and grips Vada's biceps tightly.

"So wet, think you're ready for me?" Vada plays with Y/N's clit a few more times and teasing her entrance "Please Vada, just fuck me already" Y/N desperation in her voice.

Vada started to again kiss Y/N's neck and slowly inserts two of her fingers. Relishing the feeling of being inside Y/N for so many years, how tight and silky it is, "fuck, so tight Y/N" Vada whispers, moving her fingers, massaging Y/N's walls.

A moan slips out of Y/N's mouth, a sweeet music into Vada's ears. It feels good to knowing how she pulls those sounds out of Y/N's mouth.

"Faster" Y/N whisper trying to grind into Vada's hands and anchoring her legs into Vada more, "As you wish" Vada said while she fasten her phase while her other hand gropes Y/N's breast through her dress that made Y/N moan, "Still sensitive like before" Vada thought to herself.

Feeling a little bit tighter, Vada grinded her palm to Y/N's clit that added a lot more pleasure to the other girl, "I'm close" Y/N said with labored breaths.

"Cum for me" Vada said as she kissed Y/N's lips to prevent the girl from letting out a loud moan that might get them caught. Y/N's hands went tighter around Vada's neck a she reaches her high, trying to grind on Vada's hand to help herself settle down.

Vada delivers light kisses into Y/N's neck, "You did good" Vada said.

Catching her breath, Y/N tries to push Vada away and straighten her dress from the wrinkles that developed from the past activity.

"What was that for?" Vada said, surprised with what Y/N did. While Y/N just looks Vada for a second and walks to the exit, Vada followed until they got into the parking lot and Vada grips Y/N's arm.

"Where do you think you're going?" Vada said angrily at Y/N, "Home Vada, so can you let go of my arm?" Y/N answered, "You won't go home until we are done talking Y/N" Vada says while trying to keep her voice down.

"We are done talking Vada, right before you fuck me into the lockers" Y/N exclaimed, "Your also gonna blame me? You said yes Y/N, don't make me take the blame for what happened because if I remember correctly you were begging" Vada stated as a matter of fact.

"Yes, I got what I need and you got what I want, we can call it quits" Y/N says and yanks her arms away and started to walk to her car while Vada follows her.

"Great, now you are walking away again, go, do something that you are great at. Go on and leave." Vada yelled to Y/N that made the other stop walking.

In a heartbeat, Vada feels a hot sting on her cheek, "Fuck you Vada, if you think a single fuck would get me back to you then you thought wrong. Fuck you." Y/N said walking towards her car and starting it, while Vada stands still, hand on her stinging cheek, following Y/N's car leave the lot.

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A/N: I know a short smut, but hey there's drama. Anyway, thank you for voting and sorry for the short smut. Hope you enjoyed it! I'm gonna bounce, bye.

[halliescomut]

The Boy Next World Official Trailer

Official trailer is out. I'm very excited to see where things go. It's clear some changes were made from the novel, which is exciting, because that gives an opportunity to kind of experience it with new eyes.

Official release is January 5th on MMY's YouTube as well as uncut on iQiYi.

I'm going to talk about novel to series changes that seem to be happening, so HEAVY spoilers below.

I'm going to assume if you're here, you at least watched the trailer all the way through, and I'm VERY intrigued at the choice of twist. I've seen comparisons to Two World and Vice Versa, but I didn't finish Vice Versa, so I can't speak for that in particular. To be honest, my first thought was A Christmas Carol, which is probably a little bit because of the time of year. Either way if we're doing a switch into the parallel worlds or alternate futures actually being real, I like that change SO MUCH.

The twist in the novel was so wildly problematic, to a degree where it certainly wouldn't get a pass in this day and age. And TBNW is one of Mame's older novels, so updating it for what fan/societal expectations are today is a really smart move on her part. I do wonder if she'll be updating the novel once the series is done, since she is changing a major plot point.

I'm going to talk about some other points in the novel, but I don't want to kind of repeat myself with explanations, so go check out this post where I kind of run through the things I hope to see in the series: link

To start, we see from the cast list that Ozone (or Zone) is present, being played by "Vino" Chavid Pevec. I was concerned that this character might get cut from the story, as with "colder" characters, I think having a sibling helps to give a human side to them, especially as a love interest is just getting to know them. We don't see much in the way of the side story that revolves around Cir and Zone's family, which while not a massive part of the novel, does speak to some of his motivations there, but with the changes being made, maybe it's not necessary. IDK. In the end, I can't really determine if it's a good move or not until we series the series and what was actually included.

I did make a point though that if they chose to include Cir's history and abuse at the hands of his mother I would hope they go for discussion only, versus casting a young actor to portray it, so if they've kind of removed that story, I don't think I'll be disappointed.

Wim and Jin are clearly present and we see confirmation that they will be the second couple for the series. I'm not sure how much of their characters will stay the same as the novel, as Phu and his friend group are a bit eccentric and silly, and I kinda hope we don't lose that. Going off the costuming for Jin it doesn't seem like it, so I'm hopeful.

The one of the bigger overarching points in the story is Phu actually dealing with his grief over his father passing, and we don't see much in the trailer for me to know if that's included in the series, but some of the story points in the novel really added depth to Phu's character, so I do think it would be a shame to minimize it or cut it altogether. One thing it does look like they've kept, which I'm very certain will break my heart, is Phu falling for Cir, and coming to terms with the fact that he's 'stolen' alternate world Phu's love and pushing for Cir to try and get back. In the novel, we see Phu as quite silly and a bit full of bravado, but he's also quite soft. His understanding of how much he's come to love Cir in such as short time and then considering how much more alternate world Phu would have loved him, considering they had years together is so beautiful and so sad, and handled with what I'll admit is a surprising level of subtlety that we don't often see from Mame. It's an all-around very complex situation with a lot of complex emotions, and I think it gives an opportunity for Noeul specifically to really show some range in the role.

I will say though, watching the trailer, I'm struck by the beauty of some of the shots. Like truly beautiful, so I definitely want to mention the director Mame is working with here, Thanpisit Jiradechakul. I know a lot of ppl assume that Mame directs all of her shows, and while she is heavily involved, I would say works as a co-director, she's only solo-directed Wedding Plan, and I'll be honest, you can tell the difference. I did try and look to see what other projects Thanpisit has worked on, and it looks like this is his first series. He's got commercials and some other smaller projects on his vimeo, but nothing of this scale. He is the credited editor and director for the Love in the Air music video though, so he has history with Mame, Boss, and Noeul.

Also, since I feel like it must be mentioned, yes of course the chemistry between Boss and Noeul is chemistry-ing... no one is surprised.

[f1goat]

mistake(s) x lando norris + part seven

In which you keep making the same mistake over and over again by fucking the boy you hate the most.

masterlist - playlist

part one part two part three part four part five part six

warnings: smut but with a plot, 18+ | english is not my first language fem!verstappen reader x lando norris

“Finally some fucking points,” Lando says relieved. He’s happy about the way his day went. The race may have been a total shit show, but for once it worked out for him. He finally got to race a bit more how he likes it. The car didn’t let him down this time. 

Lando is standing in a club with Max. Both celebrating their race. It’s a good day. He knows that you’re around somewhere in the club as well. He didn’t see you yet after his race. It kinda disappointed him, but he gets it. Your brother got first place - once again, so it’s logical you were with him at Red Bull to celebrate. But still. A text would be nice? He wonders why you didn’t text him about his points. But maybe it’s just a simple answer he rather won’t hear. You probably don’t really care about it. 

He takes a sip from his drink. For once Lando decided to drink some alcohol as well. After his points he deserves this. He talks a bit with Max about the race, mainly about the red flags that kept coming back. It was a weird race on that aspect. He still doesn’t get it, but he can’t say he’s mad about it. 

Lando wonders when you will show up. He knows you’re around in the club as well. He just didn’t see you yet. Hopefully that will change soon. You’re probably somewhere with Kelly he guesses. Maybe you’re just having fun, dancing around and drinking as well. Max told him that you were fond of the cocktails here. Now that Lando thinks about it, he has never seen you under the influence of alcohol. He wonders how you’ll be when you’re drunk. Maybe he will find out someday. 

Unknown to Lando is that he will find out pretty soon how you are when you’re drunk. After you’re confusing conversation with Max from a couple days back, you can’t stop thinking about you’re feelings for Lando. It has gotten pretty clear for you. You like him. Now that you realize, you also know that it might be time to stop this confusing thing with Lando. You can’t go on like this. It makes you feel disappointed and sad. And what’s a better solution than alcohol for those feelings? 

You’re dancing the night away with Kelly. The drinks are hitting you harder then ever. Maybe it’s because you don’t drink normally. You know that Lando is around here as well, but you don’t have the courage to see him right now. Since your realization, you don’t know how to act around Lando anymore. After the qualifications yesterday you couldn’t stop stuttering when he was with you and Max. Things are getting bad rather quickly. 

“Let’s go to the boys,” Kelly tells you. 

“Hmmm,” you say before taking a few more sips of your drink. You hoped to be a bit more drunk before seeing Lando. Maybe then you can behave normally around him. Kelly doesn’t wait for you to say anything else, she pulls you with her by your arm. 

Before you know it you’re standing in front of Lando again. You quickly empty your drink before muttering something about getting a new one. Letting Kelly, Max and Lando behind confused.

Lando didn’t even got the chance to greet you. He wonders about your sudden move to leave directly. Your dress distracts him a bit from his confusing thoughts. You look amazing. When you walk away, Lando keeps looking at you. He notices the way your dress moves slightly around your hips. The pinkish dress looks great on you. After a bit of doubting Lando decides to follow you towards the bar. 

He quickly finds you at the bar and takes place next to you. Before he gets the chance to let you know that he’s here, the bartender starts a conversation with you. 

“What’s your name beautiful?” The bartender asks you. 

“I’m Y/N,” you giggle. There’s the effect of the alcohol. You don’t even like the bold way of flirting the bartender does. Why are you even responding?

“I’m Jake,” the bartender tells you, “and this drink is one the house.”

Lando cringes from the conversation. He notices the good looks of the bartender. Could it be that you’re interested in Jake?

“Oh, thank you Jake,” you reply. 

Lando feels the sudden urge the mend himself into the conversation. Before he can think about it, he actually does so. He slips his arm around your waist and looks a bit annoyed at Jake. 

“That won’t be necessary Jake,” Lando states, he grabs his wallet and gets out some cash to pay for your drink. He slams it onto the bar while sending another annoyed glare at the bartender. 

You’re surprised by Lando. You didn’t realize that he was standing next to you. Where did he come from? And his arm is around your waist? Why does he act like this? You notice his frustrated tone towards Jake. What’s going on? 

“Oh sorry mate,” Jake says, “Didn’t knew she was taken. You’re lucky.”

“Yeah, I am,” Lando replies, “Come Y/N, let’s go back to Max and Kelly.”

Lando his arm stays around your waist while he walks with you through the crowd. 

“Your arm is around my waist?” You ask Lando a bit confused. You still don’t get what just happened.

“Yes I’m aware of that. What about it?” Lando replies.

You don’t know what to say to Lando. He confuses you. What about it? Why would he walk around in a public place with you close to his body like this? You let out a sigh. Why is everything so confusing all the time? It takes you a while before you realize that Lando isn’t taking you to Max and Kelly like he said earlier. He is taking you outside with him. It doesn’t take him long to do so. In only a few minutes you’re standing outside of the club with Lando. 

You want to ask Lando what he is doing, why you’re standing here with him instead of being with Max and Kelly, but before you can ask anything Lando starts to ask questions himself. 

Lando can’t stop himself from asking the things his mind has been occupied by for the whole evening. He thinks about the way you ignored him, how you didn’t say anything about his race and you’re weird interaction with that bartender. The words are falling out of his mouth before he can think about them. 

“Why are you acting so weird?” Is his first question. You can’t even think of an answer before Lando asks you another question. “Why didn’t you text me after the race?” And another. “Why didn’t you congratulate me with my points?” You want to say something, but Lando doesn’t stop asking questions. “Are you into that bartender?”

“Lan,” you sigh when he finally stops asking questions. “I don’t even remember half of the questions you asked. What’s going on?”

“I should ask you that!” Lando exclaims annoyed. He doesn’t know why he is yelling al of the sudden. He does know that he feels pretty frustrated. It’s him too much. Your weird behavior from the last days and that fucking Jake guy. 

“There’s nothing?” You try to convince yourself when you say those words, but you notice that it comes out as a question. Of course there’s something. You like Lando. That’s the baddest thing that could happen. 

“Then why are you ignoring me?” Lando continues to ask you.

“I’m talking to you, so I’m not ignoring you,” you state matter of factly. 

“Cut the bullshit,” Lando sighs annoyed. “You’re acting strange since Thursday. You barely talk to me, you leave when I come around and you don’t even congratulated me after I finally scored some points.” 

“There’s nothing going on,” you try again to convince Lando. 

“You act like there’s something going on,” Lando goes on. 

“Why do you even care?” You ask frustrated, “We’re just fucking, why care about me not congratulating you?” You realize that came out way harder then you actually meant it. Fuck. 

“You know what, you’re right,” Lando says, “I don’t care. Just continue to act like this. I’m going back.”

+++

Since your conversation with Lando you can’t stop thinking about the words you have said to him. They were harsh. And more important, they were lies. If you were just fucking with each other, why would Lando plan a whole day in Australia? Why would you sleep over at his place then? And if you were just fucking with him, then why are you feeling like this? 

You try to forget all about it. You have drank way more then you should have. You’re dancing with strangers at the moment. There’s a boy dancing closely to you. You have no idea who it is. You try to ignore the boy, but he keeps coming closer to you. You watch around you for a bit, maybe Kelly is close and can save you from the strange boy? Then you notice him. Of course. Lando is standing only a few steps away from you and his eyes are glued to your body. He’s staring so much you don’t even doubt about it this time. You don’t know what hit you, but you decide to give Lando a show. 

You weren’t the only one who said harsh words. Lando said you were right. He doesn’t care. You will show him exactly how much he cares.

Lando notices you getting closer to the unknown boy behind you. He sees the way you greet the boy, only to hug with him a few seconds later. He’s already feeling annoyed by it. 

Of course you know this is the most wrong way to get Lando his attention, but you’re still happy when you notice that it’s working. You notice Lando his white knuckles that are holding his drink way too tight. Something else you notice is the annoyed look on his face. It’s hard to miss. 

Lando doubts about his options. He wants nothing more then to go over to you and pull you away with him. But what if you don’t want that? What if you’re actually interested in the boy behind you? You made it clear earlier that you’re not interested in him, so why would he bother? Lando notices the fast pace you have while drinking your cocktail. He realizes that you’re probably drunk. He starts to pay a bit more attention to the way you look around and the way you’re moving. It seems like you’re actually drunk. Then he should do something, right? You are in no right mind to be close with this boy. What if he is using your drunk state?

You decide to give Lando one more minute before you’re going to leave the boy dancing alone. You realize that the stranger is probably hopeful to end this night somewhere else and that’s something you really don’t want. So it’s better to stop on time. You feel the way the hands of the stranger touch your body, pulling you softly by your hips. Maybe you should ignore that minute plan and just leave already. 

It doesn’t take Lando more then ten seconds to stand in front of you and the boy. He noticed the way the guy kept coming closer to you and started to touch you more and more. He decided to stop this nonsense. Lando is quick to grab your arm, softly he pulls you closer towards himself and farther away from the stranger. 

You’re relieved when you feel Lando his hand holding your wrist. 

“We’re going home,” Lando states without even looking at the unknown guy. You hear the frustration dripping through his voice. 

“Home?” You ask Lando surprised. “We’re in Australia. Not Monaco. We can’t go home that easy.” 

Lando realizes at that moment that you’re more drunk then he expected. Fuck. He sighs before pulling you with him. This is going to be a long night. Still, Lando feels frustrated with you and he wants to tell you about it. When you’re standing outside with him, waiting for a taxi, he shares a piece of his mind. 

“What the fuck were you thinking Y/N?” Lando asks you, the frustration is still present in his voice. “What if that boy wanted to use you in your drunken state? What if I wasn’t nearby?” He continues to ask you annoyed. 

You giggle. You don’t think about the words that are coming out of your mouth. “I knew you were close,” you tell Lando. 

“So that’s why you did it? You thought I would come to save you if it didn’t work out as you planned?” Lando asks annoyed. 

“Nope,” you say with a smile.

“Then why would you do something that stupid?” Lando continues to ask. 

Again, you don’t think about your words. You wish you did. The alcohol causes you to say them way too soon. 

“I wanted your attention,” you simply state. 

Lando turns himself more towards you. He looks confused at you. Did you actually just tell him that you wanted his attention? Lando lets out a sigh. This must be the alcohol talking. 

“Well it worked,” Lando tells you, “but I don’t know if this is the kind of attention you wanted.” 

Before you can question Lando his words, he pulls you into a taxi with him. He ignores you during the ride back to the hotel. You feel yourself sober up a bit during the ride. You slowly start to realize what you have done and said. Fuck, you probably screwed up everything. 

+++

“So you wanted my attention?” Lando grunts. 

You have only been in your hotel room for a few seconds, but Lando is already unzipping your dress. Before you know it, you’re standing in your lingerie in front of him. He turns you around so you face him. Lando is still looking frustrated. 

“I told you babygirl, I don’t know if this is the kind of attention you wanted,” Lando tells you. 

You don’t know how to reply to Lando. In your drunken mind, every kind of attention from his is wanted. But it would stupid to say something like that to him. Right? You hold back the words. You don’t want to embarrass yourself even more tonight. Lando doesn’t look away from your almost naked body. He notices the way your lingerie isn’t matching like usual. This time you didn’t plan anything. Your agenda doesn’t include sex, he thinks. 

“Go lay down on the bed, naked. I’ll be there in a few,” Lando tells you. He takes your room card out of your hands. You quickly walk towards the hotel bed. When you pull of your lingerie, you hear how the hotel door is being opened and closed. Is Lando leaving? You trust him on his word and still act out his instructions. 

It feels like hours before Lando is standing in front of you again. Lando knows it was only two minutes. He is proud of himself for finally bringing a toy with him. He cursed himself multiple times for forgetting about it, but this time he didn’t. 

When Lando walks into the bed room, he notices the way you’re already laying ready for him. He lets out a soft groan. Fuck. 

“You look so fucking good,” Lando tells you, “so beautiful.” 

He walks closer to you. You notice that he’s holding a small bag. You wonder what he brought with him. Lando pulls out something that you quickly recognize as a blind fold. 

“Do you trust me?” Lando asks you. 

“Yes,” you reply within a heartbeat. 

Lando sits down next to you on the bed. He wraps the blindfold around your head. It doesn’t take long before you don’t see anything anymore. You wonder about Lando his plans. You also hope he still remembers that you’re on your period. 

“Spread your legs,” Lando tells you. 

You open your legs for him. Apparently not fast enough. Lando takes the matter into his own hands, he pulls your legs further apart for himself. You have the feeling that you hear something buzzing closely to you. Lando is caressing one of your legs, his hand is close by your cunt but not close enough. You let out a whimper. 

Then you find out what the buzzing sound was. Lando is holding something vibrating close to your tits. You guess it’s some sort of sex toy. It arouses you already. Lando brings it closer to your nipple, you feel the vibrations against it. He switches between your tits and nipples. The vibration is everywhere. In the mean time, his other hand is still massaging your leg. He comes closer to your cunt, but it’s still not close enough. 

Lando slowly moves the vibrating toy towards your pubic mound. You feel the vibrations getting closer to where you want them to be. Lando massages one of your tits with his other hand. You like the fact that you’re getting surprised by his movements. Every time he moves his hand on you, you have no idea where it will end up. Just like the toy. 

Lando removes the toy from your body for a few seconds. When you feel it again, you almost jump up. The vibrations are going faster. You feel how Lando moves it around the lips of your vagina. It’s getting closer to where you want it to be, but it’s still not doing enough for you. Lando moves it closer to your clitoris, but also moves it directly away from it when he comes to close. You let out another whimper.

“Stop.. teasing,” you say softly, “please.”

“This is my attention,” Lando states, “you wanted this.”

You don’t reply to him. Lando moves the toy and suddenly it’s touching your clitoris softly. He traces around it for a bit, before letting it touch you properly. You are quick to let out a moan. That seems to be Lando his cue to decrease the vibrations. You feel the toy slowing down a bit. You let out a frustrated sound. Lando moves it away again after a few more seconds. He places it back on your tit, it’s vibrating against your nipple. 

You hear how Lando is undoing himself from his bottoms as well. His belt makes a few metallic sounds, you wonder what he does with it. Lando moves the toy completely away from you this time. You feel the bed sunken a bit, meaning Lando just took place next to you. At least, you guess so. You feel how Lando takes you in to your arms, he lifts you up. Only a few seconds later you’re finding yourself in a new position. It feels like your laying on his lap. Your ass is high up. Lando caresses it. Slowly he moves his hand around it. At this point you almost feel like dripping out of your cunt. You need him to do something. It’s making you crazy. 

“If you take this like a good girl, maybe you’ll deserve to cum later,” Lando tells you, “But you also need to tell me if you don’t like it. This is new for me as well.”

You feel yourself getting more heated. You like doing new things with Lando, but you like it even more when something is new for him as well. It makes you feel good. 

Then without a warning, Lando smacks your ass with his hand. You are surprised by his sudden action. You let out a soft yelp, but it quickly turns into a moan when you feel Lando his hand hitting your ass again. 

“Like that babygirl?” Lando asks you. 

“Y.. Yes,” you stammer. 

His hand hits your ass again. You let out another moan. Then he stops for a bit to massage your ass. It feels amazing. You feel on fire. 

“Count the next ones for me,” Lando tells you sternly, “If you miss one, I’ll start again.”

You hear his belt clinging again. The metal sounds make you wonder what he is doing with his belt. When the cold leather of his belt comes in contact with your ass, you realize what he’s doing with his belt. He’s spanking you with it. You let out a surprised gasp. It’s harder then his hand was, but it’s still feeling insanely good. You feel how your ass is already getting a bit sore, but you can’t deny that you like the feeling of it. 

“Count,” Lando reminds you. 

“One,” you quickly say.

He’s quick to let his belt hit your ass again. 

“Two,” you moan softly. 

The third time he lets his belt hit you even harder then before. You let out a hard moan when the belt comes in contact with you ass.

“Fuck,” you hiss, “Three.”

Lando takes a short break. His hands caresses your ass. Then you notice the familiar vibrating sound again. What is Lando doing? You gasp when you feel him slide the toy inside of you. It slowly vibrates into your cunt. 

The belt comes in contact with your ass again. The vibrations inside of you are making it feel even better. 

“F.. four,” you stammer.

“Would you like one more babygirl?” Lando asks you.

“Yes,” you are quick to reply. You notice your own desperate tone. 

“Ask nicely,” Lando says. 

Lando lets the belt slowly move around your ass in the mean time. It’s making you crazy. The vibrating toy inside of you and the belt that can hit you anytime on your ass now. 

“Please Lan,” you beg softly, “One more, please.”

Lando can’t resist the urge to smirk. He lifts the belt up once again, only to let it hit you on the ass a few seconds later. It was harder then he did before. He notices the way your ass is already getting red. He did expect this to be a turn on for him, but he didn’t expect it to work this well. It feels like his cock can burst out anytime. It’s throbbing crazily right now.

“Five,” you cry out. You feel like an absolute mess. Moans are trembling over your lips. You can’t stop them. 

“Fuck,” Lando moans, “You’re such a slut for me.”

“Only for you,” you whimper softly.

“What did you say?” Lando asks. He needs to know for sure he heard you right.

“I’m only a slut for you,” you confess. 

“Fuck,” Lando sighs, “you’re perfect.”

Lando lifts you up again. You quickly feel the bed touch your back. Lando gets the toy out of your cunt. You let out a disappointed whimper. Lando hoovers above you. He lets his cock slide through your labia a few time. You’re literally dripping for him at this point. It’s making him even more horny. 

When you feel the tip of Lando his cock getting almost inside your cunt, you feel the need to inform him. What if he doesn’t want to fuck you because of your period? You certainly don’t hope so. 

“Lan,” you say, “I’m still on my period.”

Lando reacts with his movements first. He slides his dick inside of you. You directly feel fulled up. 

“I don’t care,” Lando states, “I want to fuck you.”

Then he does exactly what he said. He starts to fuck you on a fast pace. You feel his cock sliding in and outside of you over and over again. You’re shaking underneath him. Then you notice the familiar vibrating sound again. You’re surprised when you feel the vibrations on your clit. Lando is holding to toy onto your clitoris while fucking you. You let out a hard moan. 

“Fuck,” you moan.

Lando increases the vibrations of the toy. You feel like you’re going crazy. Lando feels your walls clench around his dick. He notices the way you start to shake even more. When your walls start to clench even more around him, he lets go as well. Together you orgasm.

part eight

[miss-eli-starfleet]

My critique of CW’S The Flash

The Flash is one of my absolute favourite shows, and I think it deserves one of these. Yes my favourite shows deserve critiques because there are changes I would’ve liked to see instead. This is all just my opinion on the show, not exactly hating it. Plus.. I saw someone else doing something similar to here goes.

Imma be clear at the start. I don’t hate WestAllen, just really really disappointed with how they were written in the latter seasons sometimes.

Props to every actor in the Flash who put all their effort into the show whether the script was cringe or not.

Season 1-2 was FIRE. No complaints. Loved the WestAllen.

Season 3 was good,

but I think they could’ve done Savitar better. Still liked him as the big bad being depressed/emo!Barry. I’ll say that I got really attached to Harry in S2 which made me wonder why they have HR there at all? The dude grew on me, and he added humour to the team, but honestly between him and Harry, it could’ve easily been Harry. Though it means he would die at the end.. so I’m glad Season 3 had HR Wells instead sorry not sorry.

The relationship between Julian Albert and Barry was so fun to watch. Which reminds me, LOVED Eobard’s appearance as Matt Letscher in 3x01. I have no idea why they continue to use Wells’ face like bruh. Your pretending as Wells is over so like why. GIMME MORE MATT!EOBARD.

I loved Frost???

Season 4 was also great.

I’d say more quality than season 3 because it was their first time against a big bad that WASN’T a speedster yet posed a more than adequate challenge to the team. The plot was nice and unique (I really loved Hazard!). I’ll say that DEVOE was kinda showing some red flags before becoming the Thinker in his relationship with Marlize, like he seemed kinda overly possessive of her. Glad that she switched to helping Team Flash after seeing what her husband had become. Loved her “Thinker’s first victim” line.

I felt like they started focusing on Cecile too much? Her role was vital to the plot at the end with helping Barry hop into Devoe’s mind to retrieve Ralph. And speaking of Ralph, I was neutral towards the character at first, but he grew on me. Also why fire him for sometning he did like 10yrs ago. That made no sense. I’d rather Ralph than more Cecile or Allegra.

LOVED ALL THE BANTER BETWEEN HARRY AND CISCO. And FROST FROST FROST!!! I liked her S4 outfit. I also think Barry’s supersuit was the best in this season.

One of my favourite episodes was “Flashtime”. Awesome awesome filler episode.

Season 5 was also great.

Barry’s supersuit was trash tho imo. He just looks like a weird deformed strawberry.

Above average but not quite as good as S4. LOVED NORA WORKING WITH THAWNE then Barry finding out and tossing her into the pipeline cell lol. Just the betrayal, and then dumping her in the middle of a random street in the future. Loved all the father-daughter moments she had with Barry. Cool to see the writers creativity in “meta-tech”.

However Iris.. bro in 5x19 she has some issues bringing up the fact Barry NEEDED to go into the Speedforce TWICE. And then her telling Barry to his face that she didn’t care that Nora was working with Thawne. Like bro, he murdered your husband’s mother and caused sm problems. And you don’t care about that?? Good to see that Barry called her out in the end.

Imma complain about freaking Sherloque again. Why not Harry? Even after what happened to him in S4, I think he could’ve figured out that Nora is secretly working with Thawne. Like dude’s still smart af.

Nora getting erased from existence at the very end.. sad :( I miss S5 Nora

Season 6.

I feel like this is when everything started going downhill. I didn’t care for Mirror Monarch. The mirror!Iris storyline was interesting to see. Idk what happened the rest of the season. That’s how much I didn’t care for this season lol. I think the other half was about Ramsey and how he wanted to make everyone zombies. Man I HATED Sue Dearborn or however you spell her name. She just took up too much screentime. This is when it started feeling like “Iris & Friends” instead of “The Flash”.

Liked to see how Barry dealt with slowly losing his speed bc he was killing the speedforce lol. Liked how the Caitlin/Frost duo became separate people. It was cool. At least we got that lol.

I think this is when Allegra comes in. I honestly can’t stand her. Like the whole her and her sister trope? Why.

The one thing I did like was Barry’s artificial speedforce gave him speed thinking. Awesome episode to watch. EXCEPT NASH. WHY. His sacrifice is useless in the end because of the whole “Iris is Barry’s lightning rod” thing. Have nothing about a speedster’s lightning rods in the comics, just didn’t like how that was written into the show. It eventually got really annoying.

Season 7.

Where do I even begin. This is when Barry’s “children” became a thing, and then suddenly speedforce!Nora wanting to kill all of them? Like what??? Where did that come from? Dion’s storyline was interesting. The rest were just.. Meh. And the CGI was so cringe.

I loved Abra Kadabra??? Why they gotta kill him off in one episode.

Does Chillblaine start coming in this season? I dislike him in general.

Season 8.

THIS IS WHEN BARRY’S ACTUAL CHILDREN COME BACK.

Now with Nora getting erased in S5, I really would’ve preferred if they gave us Tornado Twins instead. Like you can even use the same actors, but I honestly don’t really like the new Nora. I did like seeing her interaction between her and her family.

Also. Bart. I. Have. Major. Problems. I LOVE Bart but he is supposed to be Barry’s GRANDSON. Give us Don Allen instead. I did like the episode where they messed up the timeline, went back to 2013 and then accidentally reset Jay into the timeline. Also loved the episode with the whole Barry and the gamma radiation making him age hella fast. Bro was basically a zombie at the end and still overloaded the machine with the speedforce.

The. Stupid. Power Rangers godspeed arc was shit and them being Bart’s Thawne-like arch nemesis. Like boy, don’t compare Thawne with your godspeed problems. Don’t even start. Also what is with the “Negative Forces” and “Positive Forces” Power Rangers thing and then Iris’ time sickness? At this point, The Flash just started to feel like a soap opera.

I liked Chester even though he was a “replacement” for Cisco. He was unique. But the whole Allegra/Chester budding relationship where did that come from?? It just seemed very cringe and didn’t do much for the plot besides drama I guess. Khione was meh. Like just give us Caitlin with Frost in some way. I don’t care about Khione and her arc. Pls give us more Barry and not so much Cecile and Allegra.

Season 9

The show should just be renamed “Power Rangers: Iris & Friends” at this point. They made an entire episode without Barry?? Like if I pick up a Flash comic book, I expect it to be about THE FLASH. Not his random friends. Like yes, his friends can make appearances but don’t give me a whole dang episode without Barry THE MAIN CHARACTER. Also how the hell did Cecile become that OP, where is the character development.

Idk where Chillblaine comes in but I just don’t like him, not to mention that I don’t like the relationship between him and Frost. Like what.

Eddie’s Cobalt Blue arc and Red Death arc could’ve been done WAY better. I didn’t see any plot relevance in any way. It was written so poorly. Red Death was just like evil speedster!Batman or something. Please don’t bring our beloved Eddie back if you gonna write him all just jealous of Barry and him somehow becoming the new avatar of the Negative Speedforce. And what does Batwoman have anything to do with this (I believe she appears in the finale villains arc)l

There is legit only one episode I like in S9. The one that comes “full circle”. The one where Barry gets stuck in 2000, gets to chill with his parents for one day, and then comes full circle with Matt!Eobard killing Nora. SEASON 1 QUALITY. They even use the same bg music which awwww. And the “If I can spend one more day with my parents, then what would I say to them?” Line? Chef’s kiss.

Did not like the finale. His final run speech was okay about sharing his gift. Definitely would’ve preferred if Barry became the lightning bolt that struck him in S1 like in the comics.

Idk which episodes: Loved all the Amunet & Frost storyline, and then Goldface time to time appearances. Especially “Officer Chemist” lol.

[ramona-quinn]

It’s Okay to Cry

CG!Husk, CG!Fat Nuggets, and Regressor!Angel

Plot: Angel has been crying nonstop, and Husk doesn’t know why.

Request by @yourneurodivergentlady

Heavily inspired and based on “The Crying Dame” from The Loud House

“It’s Okay to Cry” belongs to Barney and Friends

Husk looked at his phone to check the time as he held Angel in his arms. The spider regressed to a headspace equivalent of a newborn and had been crying for about two hours. Husk didn’t know why or what had gotten Angel so upset. The caregiver tried everything to stop his tears. Angel didn’t need a change, he wasn’t sick, and he wasn’t hungry. Husk tried putting Angel down for a nap, but that was also unsuccessful since he wasn’t tired either. Fat Nuggets tried cheering the little spider with his comfort items (Angel’s Rainbow Puppy and Twinkle stuffies and favorite Blue’s Clues paci), but to no avail.

“I know, today’s just not a good day, is it?” Husk comforted in a soft, hushed tone as he rocked Angel from side to side.

Husk put Angel down on his bed to text Charlie for advice. Angel instantly bawled louder because of this.

“It’s okay, Legs. I just gotta text Charlie,” Husk said as Fat Nuggets climbed on the bed and walked over to Angel, nuzzling his cheek to calm him down. “She’ll help us understand why you’re feeling sad.”

Husk then texted Charlie on his phone.

Husk: “Hey, Charlie, I need help.”

Charlie: “Sure thing, I’m on my way.”

The winged cat sighed with relief as he put his phone away. He picked Angel back up and gave him a gentle bounce. A few minutes later, Charlie arrived.

“What’s going on?” Charlie asked.

“Do you know how to get littles to stop crying?” Husk questioned. “Fat Nuggets and I’ve tried everything for Angel and nothing’s working.”

Charlie scratched her chin as she thought long and hard about Husk’s question.

“How long has Angel been crying for?”

“Two hours,” Husk replied. “I just… I don’t know. I feel like I’m doing something wrong here.”

“No, no, it’s not that at all,” Charlie reassured Husk as she put her hand on his shoulder. “You and Fat Nuggets are doing a good job taking care of Angel while he’s little. I think it’s because littles who regress to an infantile headspace are similar to actual babies. Sometimes, babies cry for no reason, no matter what we do to soothe them.”

“So, what should we do?”

“Just let Angel cry it out and continue comforting him for as long as he needs it. No matter what age, we all need a good cry every now and then. I promise you, it’s nothing that you’ve done.”

Husk smiled a bit as Charlie rubbed the still-wailing spider’s back and walked out of the cat’s room. The caregiver then carried Angel to his rocking chair and sat down.

“You hear that, kiddo? We all need a good cry sometimes, and you know what? It’s perfectly okay to cry,” Husk said as he began slowly rocking Angel in his arms. “Just let it out. I’m right here, and so is Fat Nuggets. We’re gonna be here for you, no matter what.”

Fat Nuggets walked over to the rocking chair and climbed onto Angel’s lap to join in comforting him. Husk cleared his throat and began to sing.

When you feel a tear in your eye,

it usually means you want to cry,

So if you've hurt and it hurts real bad

Or if you have feelings that are making you sad,

Then it's okay, it's okay to cry.

‘Cause I know that when I'm done crying,

I can talk about what's bothering me

And though my face gets wetter,

I feel much better

If I talk about what's bothering me.

Crying is nature's way

Of helping bad feelings go away.

So if you've been hurt or are feeling bad,

Whether you're a kid or a mom or a dad,

It's okay, it’s okay to cry.

‘Cause I know that when I'm done crying,

I can talk about what's bothering me

And though my face gets wetter,

I feel much better

If I talk about what's bothering me.

Yes, that works for me.

Angel sniffled after the song, his cries subsiding to whines and whimpers.

“Shh, it’s okay, kiddo. You’re gonna be okay,” Husk smiled softly and continued rocking the spider until he felt better.