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ladyherenya · 4 years

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Books read in October

I read a paperback book for the first time in over three months months and was sharply aware that I couldn’t change anything about the way the text was displayed to make it more comfortable to read. I wondered, sadly, if I no longer like reading physical books.

Then I became engrossed in the story, and there were long stretches of time when I didn’t think about how I was reading a brick of printed paper. I turned pages as automatically and effortlessly as breathing. I think I was just out of practice.

This month’s Unintentional Colour Scheme: pink, purple and light blue.

Favourite covers: The Time-Traveling Popcorn Ball and The Other Side of the Sky.

Also read: “Good Neighbors” by Stephanie Burgis and Tiny House, Big Love by Olivia Dade. (And half a romance novel which I disliked and have no interest in remembering or reviewing.)

Reread: The last section of The Beckoning Hills by Ruth Elwin Harris. The middle section of Hunting by Andrea K. Höst.

Still reading: Between Silk and Cyanide by Leo Marks, and Angel Mage by Garth Nix.

Next up: The Switch by Beth O’Leary, and Hamster Princess: Little Red Rodent Hood by Ursula Vernon.

The Time-Traveling Popcorn Ball by Aster Glenn Gray: A magical story of time-travel and of friendship between eleven year old Piper, who has just moved into a new house, and Rosie, who lived in the same house fifty years earlier. It’s totally charming, and exactly the sort of story I adored growing up. Sometimes that makes me wish I could send a book back in time to my younger self, but I appreciated this book’s references to things that my younger self didn’t know about. I also appreciated how, even though I’ve read similar stories, I couldn’t predict how this one would end. That was very satisfying.

The Game of Kings by Dorothy Dunnett: In 1547, Francis Crawford, the Master of Lymond, wanted by the Scottish government for treason, is back in Edinburgh. The audiobook was the perfect way to experience this! The voices the narrator uses highlights clues in the text, about who’s speaking or the subtext and emotional tones of a conversation, which helped me to follow the story even when I felt confused about exactly what was going on. I enjoyed the Scottish accents, the clever wit, the ambiguity about Lymond’s plans and motives, and the way many characters are very intelligent, perceptive people. I was interested in the historical political intrigue. I loved the twists and revelations, which are brilliant -- incredibly clever and satisfying.

“Good Neighbors” by Stephanie Burgis: The first “fantasy rom-com” about a grumpy inventor who, along with her father, moves into a cottage nextdoor to a notorious necromancer in his big black castle. I wasn’t expecting to read about Mia stitching up undead minions, but appreciate that Burgis doesn’t take this opportunity to give glory details. This short story was fun and satisfying, and I am looking forward to when the rest of this series becomes (easily) available.

Lake of Sorrows by Erin Hart: After Haunted Ground, Dr Nora Gavin heads to the midlands west of Dublin to oversee the evacuation of another body discovered in a peat bog. The setting is fascinating and I like the atmosphere -- this has a strong sense of both place and mystery. However the multiple murders meant there’s more unpleasantness than I’d prefer. But it’s probably not enough to deter me from reading the next book.

The Dictionary of Lost Words by Pip Williams: Engrossing -- a poignant story of childhood during the late 19th century and womanhood in the early 20th century, and an absolutely fascinating insight into the decades-long process behind the first Oxford English Dictionary. Esme’s father is one of the lexicographers collecting and defining words for the Dictionary. Esme grows up with a fascination for words and begins to collect words that the Dictionary leaves out. I liked that Esme has people in her life who love and support her, but the ending is intensely sad. I’m not sure why that disappointed me. As an ending, it fits this story.

Taking Down Evelyn Tait by Poppy Nwosu: Australian YA. Lottie is furious that no one else seems to realise what Evelyn Tait, her nemesis (and stepsister) is like. Her best friend Grace is in love with Evelyn. Her teachers and her father tell Lottie she should emulate Evelyn. So Lottie decides that she’s going to do just that -- she’s going to be better than Miss Perfect. I thought this was a very realistic portrayal of a teenager’s relationships -- with family, with friends, with school and with herself. It’s amusing and, ultimately, believably positive. It captures Lottie’s perspective and her experiences in-the-moment so effectively and intensely.

Wired Love: a romance of dots and dashes by Ella Cheever Thayer (1888): Nattie, a telegraph operator who chats whenever she can “over the wire” with C., another telegraph operator miles down the line. I love stories where characters fall in love through exchanged messages. And the experiences of telegraph operators is absolutely fascinating -- simultaneously a product of the past and yet incredibly relatable from a contemporary perspective, because the internet and mobile phones mean we communicate so much through text. After Nattie and Clem meet, the focus shifts away from the telegraph office to antics at their boardinghouse, but the story continues to be fun and delightful.

Once Upon a Con series by Ashley Poston:

Geekerella: When Elle discovers her late parents’ cosplay costumes in a box in the attic, she hatches a plan to enter a cosplay competition and use the prize to escape her step-family. This contemporary Cinderella retelling about two teenage fans of a SF series Starfield is a romance-through-messages story. Elle uses her father’s old phone, so sometimes she gets messages from people about ExcelsiCon, the convention her father founded. One message sparks a conversation -- but neither she nor Darien realise just who they’re texting. As expected, this is fun and fandom-y, and it makes the coincidences and Cinderella moments feel believable.

The Princess and the Fangirl: At ExcelsiCon, Starfield actress Jessica Stone swaps places with a fan, Imogen. Jess needs to find a mislaid script before she’s accused of leaking it, and Imogen hopes for an opportunity to promote the #Save Amara initiative. I enjoyed how they both experience a different side of fandom. Imogen discovers the pressures of being a star, when con appearances are your job, and, away from the spotlight, Jess discovers how cons allow people to come together and celebrate things they love. My only disappointment was the way they both deceive Imogen’s fandom friend, Harper. I wish that had been handled differently.

The Little Bookshop at Herring Cove by Kellie Hailes: Unlike other books I’ve borrowed because they had “bookshop” in the title, this didn’t focus very much on books, nor did it describe its bookshop vividly. Sophie could have easily owned a different sort of shop without changing the plot, the setting or the atmosphere. This is a light-hearted romance about nice people in a generic seaside town -- not what I was looking for. I wanted more about books and a stronger sense of place.

Lilac Girls by Martha Hall Kelly (narrated by Cassandra Campbell, Kathleen Gati and Kathrin Kana): This begins with three different women at the start of WWII -- a teenager in Poland, a newly-graduated doctor in Germany and a wealthy consulate worker in New York -- and becomes about the Ravensbruck Rabbits, Polish political prisoners subjected to medical experimentation. Not what I expected or wanted to be reading (which is not its fault. I switched to the ebook, because I'm irrationally squeamish about some medical things and cope better when reading to myself). This story is compelling and does a good job of showing how the pain and trauma didn’t just end with the war. And it’s incredibly important to keep telling stories about distressing parts of history.

The Other Side of the Sky by Amie Kaufman and Meagan Spooner: More or less the sort of story I expected from these two. Nimh is the Divine One in a world of magic and prophecy. North is a prince in a floating city of science and engineering. Nimh believes the gods fled into the sky thousands of years ago, and North believes no one still lives down on the surface… until he crashes his glider. I enjoyed this but don’t feel any emotional investment -- yet. I will read the sequel.

Spoiler Alert by Olivia Dade: April and Marcus keep fandom separate from their professional lives -- April to avoid negative comments, Marcus (an actor) to avoid violating his contract. So when Marcus sees a cosplay photo of April online, he doesn’t recognise his friend, he just sees a gorgeous woman getting nasty comments and invites her to dinner. I was hooked. As a romance, this didn’t always focus on the things I most wanted it to, but I understood why it made those narrative choices and liked how the characters resolved their mistakes. And I really liked it as a story about fanfiction and the way we tell stories in response to other stories.

Big Love, Tiny House by Olivia Dade: Lucy goes on a Tiny House Hunting show and drags along her best friend Sebastian. I’ve watched countless tiny house videos on Youtube, so it was fun to see tiny houses depicted in fiction -- although I was disappointed that all the houses are so disastrously bad. Beyond that, I have no strong feelings one way or another about this romance novella.

Memento: an Illuminae Files novella by Amie Kaufman and Jay Kristoff (narrated by a full cast): A bonus prequel, set aboard the Alexander prior to the events of Illuminae. The audiobook is so well done! Even though this is a short story/novella, I cared about the new characters it introduces -- I really like the epistolary format and how it requires the reader to fill in some of the gaps for themselves. (I think that’s part of why I love The Illuminae Files but so far have no strong feelings about Kaufman and Kristoff’s latest series.) And it’s always interesting to see more of AIDAN.

#Herenya reviews books #Aster Glenn Gray #Dorothy Dunnett #Erin Hart #Pip Williams #Poppy Nwosu #Ella Cheever Thayer #Ashley Poston #Martha Hall Kelly #Amie Kaufman #Meagan Spooner #Jay Kristoff #Olivia Dade #Stephanie Burgis

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jewish-privilege · 5 years

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Eric Lidji is a man who cares deeply about modest ambitions. He has lived in Pittsburgh on and off for 20 years. It is a city perfectly sized to his sensibility, neither very small nor very large—a place known to but mostly ignored by those who do not live there. Lidji, 36, has held many jobs; most recently, in late 2017, he became the director and only permanent staff member of the Rauh Jewish History Program & Archives, a repository of early-20th-century local Yiddish-theater posters as well as records from dozens of small-town synagogues in western Pennsylvania. But even before he became an archivist, Lidji’s work has always been the same: He is a diarist of small delights, a chronicler of curios, an ardent psalmist of Pittsburgh’s quirky charms.

Like many of the 49,000 other Jews in the Pittsburgh area, Lidji was socializing at a local synagogue on the final Saturday in October last year when he heard the first rumors of a shooting at the nearby Tree of Life synagogue. The news was soon confirmed: Eleven Jewish worshippers had been murdered. Lidji felt paralyzed: Shabbat, the Jewish day of rest, was still ongoing, and he wasn’t sure what to do. It wasn’t until a few hours later that something clicked, and Lidji felt a certain desperation stirring alongside his sorrow. Already, people were laying artwork and stones, which Jews customarily place on graves, on the sidewalk around the synagogue where the shooting had taken place. Many of the accumulating objects were fragile and homemade, with no clear owner or steward, left outside without protection against Pittsburgh’s notoriously wet weather. This was not just an outpouring of grief, but a proliferation of artifacts—artifacts that, in Lidji’s view, should be preserved.

On the Monday morning after the shooting, Lidji met with half a dozen colleagues who work in other divisions of Pittsburgh’s Heinz History Center, where the Jewish archives are housed. Together they formed a task force, fanning out to as many vigils, funerals, and religious services as they could. They filled their bags with copies of programs and approached speakers after public events, asking them for their notes. Whenever Lidji spotted someone carrying a sign, he would hurry over and hand them a business card, hoping they would call him when the card reappeared at the bottom of a purse or in a pocket emptied for laundry and offer to donate what they had made. Sometimes he felt overwhelmed. On the Tuesday after the shooting, he showed up at a protest against President Donald Trump in Squirrel Hill, Pittsburgh’s historic Jewish neighborhood, to find thousands of people gathered in the streets carrying signs and banners. “It felt like … archiving the ocean,” he told me.

The grim reality of Jewish history is that Lidji is not the first archivist of his kind. Medieval Jews buried family heirlooms in the walls of their houses in times of plague, fearing that they might be blamed for the disease. Scholars founded the Yiddish institute YIVO in the early 20th century, recruiting ordinary Eastern European villagers to collect photographs and folktales of a culture threatened by pogroms and mass migration. Emanuel Ringelblum led a covert effort to collect and bury artifacts documenting life in the Warsaw Ghetto in the early years of the Holocaust, before its inhabitants were murdered and its remaining structures burned to the ground.

...Since the attack, Lidji has experienced a personal religious transformation: After nearly 15 years of haphazard Jewish observance, he started attending services every day. But there were other reasons to show up for prayer: It has proved a useful venue for winning people over to the cause of archival collection.

...After the attack, Lidji’s first big challenge was becoming more visible to the community: being unobtrusively, insistently present at memorial events, and building relationships with community leaders. His second big challenge was convincing the Pittsburgh Jewish community that its history is worth preserving.

The first time Lidji felt “any sense of accomplishment,” he told me, was when a man who had been “polite but reticent” about the archival project came over during morning minyan one day and announced that he had found “the perfect object.” On the day of the shooting, a boy had been celebrating his bar mitzvah at an Orthodox synagogue about a mile away from Tree of Life, and continued the service even as news of the shooting reached the community. The bentscher, or book containing the prayers said after meals, captured the moment perfectly, the man told Lidji: It featured the boy’s name and the starry Pittsburgh Steelers logo wrapped around the date, 10.27.18. Lidji eventually got hold of one of the bentschers.

The most significant items Lidji has collected have what he calls “the shine,” a certain raw, emotional quality that indicates an object’s clear connection to the past. In the week after the attack, students at the Hillel Jewish University Center of Pittsburgh gathered and expressed their feelings on Post-its. “My childhood illusion of security as a Jew was shattered,” one student wrote. Lidji and his colleagues collected programs from memorial events, some more pointed than others: A community with a large Bhutanese population hosted a vigil, where attendees seemed to feel acutely the dangers of being an ethnic minority. A large Reform Jewish congregation, Rodef Shalom, hosted a small event where the preschool director reported that ever since the attack, the children had been obsessed with building elaborate protective structures out of blocks.

...A few weeks after the attack, Lidji got a call from a local family who wanted to donate a sign they made for the first memorial vigil, on the night of the shooting. When the mother brought her two children, 3 and 5, to the archives, the older child asked why they had to give the sign away. Sometimes, Lidji told her, things are so important that we have to make sure they will be around for a really long time. Right, the girl’s mom added. One day, you will be able to bring your grandchildren to see this sign.

In late summer, Lidji picked up several vanloads’ worth of material from Jewish organizations around town, ranging from condolence notes to quilts to paper cranes they had received in the preceding months. Lidji said it will probably take him at least a year to go through it all. And there’s more: Tree of Life and the other two congregations that were in the building during the shooting received an estimated 10,000 letters in the days after the attack. It is unclear where they will end up.

“People will tell this story someday, and they’re going to tell it using this information that we’ve all left behind for them,” Lidji told me. “We’ve only done as good a job as we could do. We couldn’t save everything.”

...Lidji has had to figure out how to start telling the story of the Pittsburgh shooting, a story with much larger and darker implications than any he’s had to tell before. At first, it was Jewish organizations in and around Pittsburgh that approached him to help them make sense of the shooting—the Orthodox yeshiva where he went to high school, an area synagogue where one of the victims’ children attend services. Eventually, he started getting requests from people who live farther afield. In June, Lidji spoke at a convention in Colorado of mostly non-Orthodox chevrot kadisha, or sacred societies, made up of the members of Jewish communities who oversee the washing and burial of the dead. The convention was held not long after a gunman allegedly killed 51 people and wounded dozens more in a mosque in Christchurch, New Zealand, and also not long after a 19-year-old man allegedly opened fire in a synagogue in Poway, California, murdering one woman and injuring three others, including a rabbi and an 8-year-old girl.

Lidji began his talk with a story he sometimes tells when he’s trying to explain the deeper meaning of the archives project. Psalm 90 begins, “A prayer of Moses, the man of God.” According to Jewish tradition, most of the Psalms were composed by King David, who was born centuries after Moses died. How, Lidji asked, could David have known what Moses had said in his prayers?

In answer, Lidji offered his interpretation of a line from the Radak, a medieval Jewish commentator, painting a scene of dramatic discovery: King David, unable to sleep and wandering around his palace at night, finds a pottery jar containing a mysterious scroll bearing Moses’s prayers. How meaningful it must have been, Lidji said, for David to hold in his hands the words of the Jewish tradition’s greatest prophet. Psalm 90 itself describes how insignificant human events must seem to God: For in Your sight, a thousand years are like … a watch of the night. And yet the Jewish people, Lidji explained, have been able to maintain continuity in part because their archives have let them “come back later and be reminded.”

The bar mitzvah boy who persevered through his prayers even as his synagogue went on lockdown will one day die. The little girl who gave her sign to the archives will one day die. From dust to dust: A century hence, no one who witnessed the Pittsburgh synagogue shooting and its aftermath will be around to explain why they loved Squirrel Hill. If it survives, Lidji’s archive will be all that’s left to tell a more textured story. Depending on what comes next, those stones and signs and notes of grief could tell radically different stories: of a rare aberration in American Jewish history, or the restarting of an ancient clock.

#long post #pittsburgh shooting #z''l

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sellyripley · 5 years

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Alpha’s Exceptional Cargo

Fan Fiction:

Fandom: Crossover between the Robot Trains universe and the Tayo & Titipo universe.

Genre: Dystopian/Apocalyptic

Pairings: None

Set around 30 years in the future of the Tayo & Titipo universe, intended as an origin story for the Robot Trains world. A bit dark, a bit weird. Here goes nothing…

///

Alpha’s Exceptional Cargo

Hana gazed out the window of the rail office that doubled as her living space while Titipo, Gani and Alpha dawdled along through the rail yard in the distance. Titipo and Alpha stayed confined to the tracks while Gani kept on the road parallel to the tracks, staying as close to his companions as possible.

Alpha could actually leave the tracks, if he had really wanted to.

Alpha reminded Hana of Tayo, back when he and Gani had been young buses. He had young Tayo’s chipper and curious manner.

Hana had utilized the salvageable components of Tayo’s old memory chips in Alpha’s construction. Alpha didn’t retain Tayo’s memories, but at least, he did seem to retain some of his mannerisms and personality traits.

Now Gani’s red paint was faded and weathered, his voice no longer child-like but tired and wise. He was a patient guardian to Alpha, the rail-yard’s newest addition.

Alpha’s upbeat attitude was a welcome contrast to the perpetual night that had befallen the Earth. The sun was now blotted out by a thick black smog – the consequence of humanity’s wasteful and selfish choices. But it didn’t bother Alpha because he’d never known any different.

It had been years since Hana had left her post at the bus garage along with the remaining buses and relocated to the Choo Choo Town rail station. Teo, the train inspector, had left the rail-yard saying he needed to spend humanity’s final years with his family.

But to Hana, the Trains and Buses were her family.

“Alpha!” Hana called, her own voice sounding aged and tired. “Can you please come here for a bit?” the mechanic stood outside of her quarters on a platform by the tracks.

Alpha pulled up next to her, remaining in his train form. “Please transform into your robot form, Alpha.” Requested Hana.

“Aww, do I have to?” The young train whined. Alpha, the first of his kind as his named denoted, did not like taking on his robot form. It made him stand out.

He’d preferred to imagine that he was just a normal vehicle, like his mentors, Titipo, Gani and the others. It was bad enough being the youngest train without also feeling like an oddity.

Reluctantly, Alpha took on his robot form and stood awkwardly next to the tracks.

“What is it, Hana?” He chimed. “I need to give you one last check-up. And then I need to give you something.”

“Last check up?” Alpha asked as Hana went over him with a scanner. “What do you mean?”

“Well,” Said Hana “I need to give you something…something special. And then very soon after that, I’ll need to go away.”

“How long will you be gone?” asked Alpha “And what do you need to give me?”

“It’s…a type of fuel. I designed you so that…with this type of fuel, you’ll have energy that will last for a very long time. You’ll have plenty of energy without ever needing to refuel. And someday, you’ll be able to help other trains do the same. But, I’m going to have to leave here after I give it to you and you won’t see me again. But don’t worry. Gani, Titipo and the others will look after you from now on.”

Hana knew the right moment had come to impart this final gift to Alpha. From Hana’s scans of the area, there wasn’t another human for hundreds of miles. Under current environmental conditions, it wouldn’t be possible for a human being to leave shelter long enough to commute that distance so Alpha now stood no chance of accidentally crossing paths with one.

There were only a handful of humans left on the Earth, and they too would inevitably be gone soon.

Hana wasn’t as sad about that as most would be. She’d always felt closer to machines than humans anyway. The machines were inherently giving and selfless.

But now there were no passengers left and soon there would be no mechanics or engineers either. If any semblance of society was going to carry on into the future, machines were going to have to be able to use their giving and selfless nature to take care of one another from now on. And Hana was determined to ensure that that was possible.

Alpha’s eyes shined with dismayed sadness “But Hana! I don’t want you to leave!”

She distinctly heard a hint of Tayo’s voice in the young train’s plea.

“Alpha, this world isn’t for humans any more. Humans have not taken good care of it and now we can’t live here any longer. Almost all the humans are gone and now it’s time for me to go to. You vehicles will have to try to do a better job than we did. And in the future, there will need to be more trains like you to help take care of everyone.”

“But no one wants to be a robot train.” Pouted Alpha, somewhat resentful of his creator’s seemly bizarre design choices.

Hana could understand. She imagined, even if humans had developed the technology to modify themselves into some more efficient configuration, they would probably still be much attached to the human form to which they were accustomed. Most would not prefer a phenotype too strange or alien for themselves or their offspring, even if it did afford some new advantages.

Maybe the robot-train design would eventually come to be more accepted. As with human society, advancement would likely be gradual.

But, even a just few robot vehicles among the more conventional models would be sufficient – to look after and repair the others. To be the protectors of society.

As the first, a lot of responsibility would fall on this kid’s shoulders. But, Hana trusted Gani and Titipo to guide him through it. She’d left all of her schematics, all of her research and all of her designs with them. Alpha would eventually grow to be their guardian and caretaker.

Hana finished her exam and tucked her scanner away. She removed her red mechanic’s hat and wiped her brow.

“Everything looks good, Alpha. You can turn back into train form now. I’m going to go get the fuel, but it will take me a minute.”

Hana disappeared down a corridor between shipping containers and returned dressed head to tow in a thick coverall garment along with heavy boots, gloves, and a face shield. She wheeled a large, heavy container on an electric dolly. The trefoil symbol on the container did not mean anything in particular to Alpha.

“Why are you dressed like that Hana?” asked Alpha.

“Your new fuel isn’t safe for humans to get too close to for very long without protective gear. So, you wouldn’t want to get close to any humans, but there isn’t really a risk of that anymore.”

Hana opened the container to reveal within its thick metal walls a series of beautiful luminescent rods.

Hana took her time installing the new fuel source along with the equipment needed for Alpha’s engine to process it.

She then stood up slowly and said weakly “Go on now and tell Titipo that I’ve given you the fuel and that I’m leaving now.”

Even under the heavy protective gear she wore, Alpha perceived that Hana did not seem well.

Alpha hesitated a moment. He wanted to stay and try to help somehow…but then thought better of it and sped off.

He had never felt so full of life and energy.

///

Ten Years Prior

“Hana, please. You shouldn’t be alone at a time like this. There isn’t much time left, and people need to stick together. You can come spend these last few years with my family.” Teo pleaded.

Hana turned from her work on the computer to face the train inspector.

“Alone!?” Replied Hana “Of course I won’t be alone! Someone’s got to take care of the trains and buses!”

“Hana, please…” begged Teo. “The trains and buses… are just machines. They don’t really think and feel like you and me. They’re just…an imitation. They were made for people, by people. It’s people who are important.”

Hana stood up from the computer and crossed her arms in consternation.

“Well I don’t think of them like that! And if you’re not going to stick around, then I have a lot of repairs to take care of. So if you’ll excuse me…”

Hana stormed out of the office passed Teo.

Teo stared at Hana’s computer apprehensively.

He knew all about her big plan. To help enable machines to carry on without humanity. The idea unsettled Teo deeply. Machines were made to serve humans. Without humans, what was their purpose?

The thought of machines mindlessly carrying out their pointless tasks for thousands of years in the absence of humans sent a chill down Teo’s spine. As though…his own soul couldn’t be at rest as long as this hollow echo of humanity persisted.

He sat down at the computer and sifted through Hana’s plans.

He knew a thing or two about programming machines himself.

He read through the designs for Hana’s new new train. This affront to humanity’s legacy would not take place on Teo’s watch. He would insert some code of his own. Teo might not be able to save humanity from their own self destruction, but with a little luck, he could prevent this eternal mockery.

A virus.

It had to be well hidden or Hana would detect it, which meant it would have to lie dormant even after the train’s construction. Like a time bomb. But someday, at the right moment it would be released and hopefully put an end to Hana’s machine society. And then humanity would finally be at peace.

#Robot Trains #Tayo the Little Bus #Titipo #Fan Fiction

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crashdevlin · 6 years

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Fine

Author’s Note: This is part three of the Happily Ever Eventually series.

Summary: Y/n is determined to go to the Vegas Convention, despite her OB/GYN’s warnings not to travel and Jensen’s protests.

Pairing(s): Jensen Ackles X Reader

Word Count: 5040

Warnings: Fluff, pregnancy, labor stuff, descriptions of a c-section, a small allusion to polyamory

“Okay, but you’re about to pop. You sure you wanna do this?” Jay asked, a slightly worried look in his eyes.

I rolled my eyes. “I’ve got two weeks ‘til I’m due, honey, and Nova was late, so we’re fine.” I smiled and pressed my lips to his cheek. “I promised Adam I’d do Vegas this year, I can’t bitch out because I’m kinda close to time to get this kid cut out of me, Jay.”

“And if you go into labor in Nevada when your doctor is in Florida?”

“I’m sure there are Obstetric Surgeons in Vegas. Stop worrying.”

“What’d Dr. Sexton say?”

I sighed, shaking my head. “She thinks it’s a bad idea to travel in my condition, but-”

“Then, why are you going?”

“Because I want to! Because I haven’t been to a convention in months and some of the fans actually really want me there and I hate sitting at home doing nothing and I miss you when you’re gone and I’m really fucking pregnant and if I do go into labor, I want it to be wherever you are.” I bit my lip, looking down at my protruding belly. “I want to be with you, Jay. Please, don’t make me cancel.”

He smiled, softly, and put both hands on my belly as he bent to catch my eyes. “I couldn’t make you do anything, baby girl. Wouldn’t. I want you with me, too. I just worry. Okay, guess you’re coming. But if Mav ends up with a Nevada birth certificate, I’m blaming you.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~

“I hate that they killed Tara off instead of writing the baby in. Dean would be such a good dad!”

I raised my eyebrows at the fan on the sidelines of the auditorium. “Did they kill Tara off? Did we actually see her die? I really don’t remember. My life has been super crazy over the last eight months. Did we really kill her?” The audience shouted out ‘yes’, but a few responded with, “No one ever stays dead!” “Ah, but she’s not a Winchester, or Castiel. She’s not one of Chuck’s faves. She’s just a witch and a love-interest. How many of those have ever come back, right?”

I shrugged. Of course, Tara was coming back but I wasn’t supposed to let them know that. “Anyway, Dean is a good dad! Look at Jack!” I chuckled. “Thank you for your kind words. I’ll tell the writers that they’re assholes for not writing the baby in.” I swiveled to the other side of the stage. “Hi!”

“Hi! I was wondering, how did Tom react to you getting with Jensen?”

I nodded. “Um, he… huh, he did not take it well. Um… he sent… sorry, let me rephrase for the legal team… A box full of vacuum-sealed rat carcasses was sent to my parents’ home addressed to me. There was no return address, but even the cops said it was probably sent by someone who was quote, ‘Unhappy about my new relationship’.” I smiled, brightly. “I responded by sending him copies of my ultrasound pictures and one of me giving him the finger.”

I cleared my throat. “I mean, really, I expected a lot more backlash from him. The man literally thought he owned me, so… it was an ordeal. There were some letters sent, anonymous of course, calling me all sorts of names, and someone dox’ed me in Tom’s name, but there were some very awesome feminist hackers that worked to get my information taken down, so… I will say that, uh, Tom’s fans were more pissed off about me getting with Jensen than some of you guys and that blows my mind. I guess they thought I broke his heart or cheated on him or something and they… didn’t take kindly.”

“So, have you come up with a name for the baby, yet?” the next fan asked.

“Yes. But it’s a surprise, so… You guys’ll find out in a few weeks, I promise.”

“When you got with Jensen the first time, was that before or after the scene in Sleeping Beauty in the library?”

I laughed. “It was before and therefore super awkward. Like, it was a huge deal to Richard that he was the one directing the ep where Dara became canon so his enthusiasm was a bit weird and I had just broken up with Tom that morning and the day before was the first time I'd spoken to Jay in months and kissing him was this huge scary thing that I guess I over prepared for. We did the first take and then Richard says ‘Well it looks like you've prepared for this, put a lot of thought into it, but I need you to be more surprised when he kisses you’. So I said, you know, that I had prepared and he said ‘It's called Acting, sweetheart’ and then he sent me of to prepare to look unprepared. Several minutes later, Jensen walks up, starts talking about Jare and him taking me to dinner to celebrate me coming to my senses about Tom and I started to respond and then he just grabs my head and kisses me. Well, they were trying to catch me off-guard and it fuckin’ worked. I'm not angry about it. The footage was perfect, but it's not exactly the first kiss story I wanna tell our kid about.”

“How did you guys even… get together? That sounds rude, but I'm just so curious. I mean, you guys were friends, then Tom came in and tore you away from him and then you came back and… what, when Danneel filed for divorce, you and Jensen fell into bed?”

“Um, no. Uh, there was always this sexual tension between us, which I genuinely thought was imagined for a very long time. I really thought it was wishful thinking or just that kinda funny sexual humor shit he does with Misha, but it was always there, and when I was with Tom, I realized how much I missed Jensen. Like, I was predisposed to fall in love with Jay. I was half in love with him from the get and… when he told me that Dee was divorcing him, I cried with him. After yelling at him to fix it, of course. I mean, I’d just broken up with Tom, so I didn't want another relationship to die when I was building my own a pyre. But we cried together and that's when I knew… that's when I knew I really loved him, because I knew that the two of us together, we could handle anything. Broken hearts, busted careers, terrible exes, nothing could touch me if I had Jay.”

A few loud ‘Awww's broke through the noise and I chuckled. “I expected it to be this unrequited thing and I was gonna be okay with that, but… but then Danneel filed for divorce and Jensen needed me to be there for him and… the two of us together, we handled it.”

“And then you got to handle him,” the fan said.

I laughed. “You’re right. And I’m sure y’all are fishing for some personal information on us gettin’ together, but… Jay’s pretty private so…” There were boos across the auditorium and I laughed again. “Okay… so… I’ll tell you that, uh, he’s...just as awesome as you assume.”

“What is your response to Tom saying that you were Jensen’s mistress way back in 2017?” another fan asked.

“The man sent me dead rats because he didn’t like me dating Jensen. I’m not responding to any ridiculous accusations he has.”

The next few questions were about the show. “If there were a way to bring Tara back, do you think you’d do it?” “When you were just friends with Jensen, was it hard to do the flirty scenes?” “Have the boys ever pranked you before?” “Misha said he made you a gift for the baby shower. What was it?”

I glowed at that question. I saw it in the videos and pictures later. My whole face lit up at that question, despite the cramping pain starting up in my abs. I ran my hand across my belly. “A fucking crib! He made a solid oak crib, with a changing station, a place for a laundry basket, and an alcove to put a diaper pail! The side also removes so that it can become a regular toddler bed when the kid gets old enough. It’s fuckin’ gorgeous, too! I can’t believe Misha didn’t post pics of it when he was making it!”

“Why don’t you?!” someone in the audience shouted.

“Uh, because he etched the kid’s name on it and I said that’s a fuckin’ surprise.” I hissed in pain and cleared my throat as Louden Swain took the stage behind me. “Oh, and I guess that’s gonna have to be the end, you guys! I will see you guys at SNS!”

“You okay?” Bri asked when I made it to the Green Room.

I nodded. “I’ve just got really bad heartburn again. I’ve got Tums in my bag.”

“You aren’t gonna go into labor, are you? Because I think Jensen would probably be pretty pissed off if you had that baby while he was on a plane,” Kim said, walking up to me with a bottle of water.

“I’m not in labor. I just have heartburn. Leave me alone.”

“Are you sure? You want someone to drive you to the hospital?” Misha asked, kneeling down in front of where I was sitting on the little loveseat sofa. Kim, Bri and Adam Fergus all muttered in agreement, offering to call a car and go with.

I shook my head at them. “I’m not missing my first Saturday Night Special in eight months just because I’ve got heartburn. It’s fine.” Their mutters turned to ones of disbelief and I rolled my eyes. “Seriously! My water has not broken, I’m not having contractions, I’ve got two weeks ‘til Maverick is supposed to come out, leave me alone.” I hissed again as a cramp rolled across my lower half.

“You sure you’re not having contractions, sweetie?” Bri asked with a small smile on her lips.

“They’re just Braxton-Hicks. They’re not regular, they don’t hurt anywhere near as bad as the real ones. Again, I’m fine. Go away.”

“Did you bring your hospital bag with you, just in case?” Misha asked.

I groaned. “Of course I did! Do you really think Jensen would let me travel two thousand miles without bringing my comfort bag? Now, come on. Go do something else. I’m gonna take a nap.”

“Are you gonna be able to sing tonight?” Rob asked, walking into the Green Room as I lied down on my side.

“I’m definitely going to sing tonight. I can’t promise it’ll be my best performance, but I’m gonna do it.”

“If she doesn’t give birth before then.” I threw my water bottle at Misha’s head, but I was lying down so it missed.

“Okay, okay. Leave her alone.” Misha retrieved the bottle and handed it back to me.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“Hey, Bri and Kim text-” Jay said, walking in and dropping his bag on the floor next to the loveseat.

“I’M FINE!” I shouted. He raised his eyebrows at me. “I’m sorry, honey. They just… They’ve been so… I’m hormonal, that’s all. Hi, I missed you.” I sat up and moved to stand but he just leaned down and wrapped me in a hug.

“You sure you’re good to-”

“Yes! Yes, I’m good. I’m good to get on stage and sing, Jay. I’m not in labor. Calm down.”

“Okay. They had me worried.”

“I would have called you if I were in labor. I would be at the hospital telling the doctors not to cut me open until you showed up.”

He chuckled. “I can just imagine that, you screaming at the doctors not to touch you ‘til I get there.”

“Exactly. And at least I can trust you not to look behind the curtain when they tell you not to.”

“What curtain?” Misha asked, walking up.

“When they start the c-section, they’re gonna have a plastic curtain up so that I can be in the OR with her, sitting by her head and keeping her calm while they cut her open.” He chuckled. “Nate looked behind the curtain; got to see y/n’s intestines and insides. It, apparently, scarred him.”

“Deserved it.” I laughed. “He almost fainted!”

“Well, I will be looking at your gorgeous face, so you won’t have to worry about that.”

“You really think my face is gonna look gorgeous when I’m in labor? I’m gonna be all sweaty and red and-”

“Bullshit. They’re gonna give you an epidural and you’re not gonna be feeling a damn thing.”

“Oh, I hope it lasts the whole surgery this time.” Misha and Jay both raised their eyebrows at me. “I haven’t told you this? The epidural wore off halfway through Nova’s birth. They had to give me more anesthetic… after I finally convinced them that I wasn’t feeling pressure, I was feeling pain, which took about ten minutes. Nova’s birth was sucky for everybody, even her. She was purple when they pulled her out, wasn’t breathing. I’m sure Maverick’s gonna be a lot easier.”

“I hope so. I don’t know how I’d deal if Mav wasn’t breathing,” Jay said.

“You’d cry,” I answered.

“Yeah, probably,” he admitted. “Come on. Let’s go get dressed for the SNS.” He helped me up from the loveseat and picked up his bag.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The pain in my stomach got more persistent as the night progressed. Okay, so I was in labor, but I had important shit going on and I could power through pain. My water hadn’t broken and there were still six minutes between contractions, so I knew that going to the hospital wasn’t going to help anything.

I wore a cute purple maternity dress and the cutest ballet flats I owned. Jared insisted on helping me onto the stage, even though there was a handrail on both sides of the stairs. It was endearing, but also hilarious. Billy handed me a microphone as Jared bounced down the stairs. “You ever notice that men seem to think you’re an invalid once you get so pregnant you can’t see your feet? I mean, I worked a retail job until right before I popped with Nova.”

“You gonna be jumping around like you used to do, then?” Rob asked.

“You’re hilarious, Robbie. No, if I start jumping around, I might dislodge this kid and no one wants that… except me and Jay and both of our families and all of the kids… what was I talking about?”

“Pregnancy brain. You were gonna sing for us, y/n/n,” Rob responded.

“Oh, yeah! Mary Lambert. Duh.” I laughed, louder than normal to hide a whimper as another contraction tore through me. Adam Malin stood at the keyboard and started to play. “I’m a million miles away, from anywhere. Slide my hands across the sheets, pretend you’re there. But missin’ you is a slow burn, And every time the earth turns, I’m reminded the night is only half the time. Even though I’m hurtin’ I know that this is worth it. Tell me it’ll be all right. Gotta give me something to get me through the nothin’. One more night.” Stephen came in with heavy drums as the chorus started.

“Kiss me like the world is gonna disappear. I’m a better person when I have you here. Oh, I-I got you, And I-I can get through, anything as long as I can see your face. But right now, you’re so far away, so far away. You’re so far away, so far away.” There were not an overwhelming amount of people who were singing along, but that’s okay. I wasn’t really singing for them. I was singing for me and Jay, listening right behind the big black curtain. “I don’t need a map to tell me where you are. You and I, we come from the same star. Every day is a heartache. And every night I lie awake, I’m reminded the bed is only half mine. Even when I’m hurting I know that this is worth it. Tell me it’ll be all right. Gotta give me something to get me through the nothing, One more night. Kiss me like the world is gonna disappear. I’m a better person when I have you here. I-I got you. And I-I can get through, Anything as long as I can see your face. But right now, you’re so far away, so far away. You’re so far away, so far away.”

I bit my lip as another contraction hit me. Much quicker than the six minute interval from before. Maybe four minutes this time. I gripped the mic tighter and kept singing into the bridge. The show must go on and all that. As Freddie Mercury said, “I’ll fucking do it, darling.”

“Nobody’s got the time, nobody’s got the time, nobody’s got the for love. Nobody’s got the time, nobody’s got the time, nobody’s got the time for love.” I took a deep breath and poured my heart into the last chorus. “Kiss me like the world is gonna disappear. I’m a better person when I have you here. I-I got you, and I-I can get through, Anything as long as I can see your face. Kiss me like the world is gonna disappear. I’m a better person when I have you here. I-I got you, and I-I can get through, Anything as long as I can see your face. But right now you’re so far away, so far away. You’re so far away, so far away.”

The audience exploded as the song finished and tears started rolling down my cheeks, completely without asking me if I wanted to cry. “Oh, god you guys are so awesome! I missed this so much! Thank you for making this SNS worth it!”

Jared rushed the stage to help me down and Jay smiled at me. “How you doin’, Baby Girl?”

“I’m good, Jay. Rock the house for me.”

He winked at me and jumped up onto the stage. “Las Vegas!” Screaming from the audience as I took a seat on the stairs. I wanted to hear him, but the contractions were killing me at this point. “What’d you think of my girl’s song?!” More screaming, a little bit of blushing from me. “Her voice is so freakin’ awesome! Hate to have to follow that, man! But I will, with an equally sappy song that’s got the bonus of being about sex.” Stephen started to drums and I smiled. Matt Nathanson, ‘Come On Get Higher’. I love that song.

“I miss the sound of your voice. And I miss the rush of your skin. And I miss the still of the silence, As you breathe out and I breathe in. If I could walk on water, If I could tell you what’s next, I’d make you believe. I’d make you forget. So come on get higher, loosen my lips. Faith and desire and the swing of your hips. Just pull me down hard, And drown me in love. So come on get higher, loosen my lips. Faith and desire and the swing of your hips. Just pull me down hard, and drown me in love.” I turned to see if I could see him through the curtain, but he was on the other side of the stage. “I miss the sound of your voice, The loudest thing in my head. And I ache to remember, All the violent, sweet, perfect words that you said. If I could walk on water, If I could tell you what’s next, I’d make you believe. I’d make you forget. So come on get higher, loosen my lips. Faith and desire and the swing of your hips. Just pull me down hard, And drown me in love. So come on get higher, loosen my lips. Faith and desire and the swing of your hips. Just pull me down hard, and drown me in love.”

I smiled, knowing what part was coming next. My favorite part of the song. “I miss the pull of your heart. I taste the sparks on your tongue. I see angels and devils and God when you come… on. Hold on, hold on, hold on, hold on!” He didn’t even try to hit that high note, but it sounded better without it. “Sing sha la la. Sing sha la la la.” He went to humming after that, obviously avoiding the high-pitched ‘ooh’s. “So come on get higher, loosen my lips. Faith and desire and the swing of your hips. Just pull me down hard, And drown me in love. So come on get higher, loosen my lips. Faith and desire and the swing of your hips. Just pull me down hard, and drown me in love.”

“You okay?” Jared asked over the sound of the fans screaming themselves hoarse.

“Yup,” I lied.

“Okay. You’re just holding off until Jensen gets done singing, aren’t you?”

“Yup.”

“How close are they?”

“Every four minutes or so. I’d say they aren’t very strong, but I have a pretty good pain tolerance, so… eye-dee-kay. I sang through one, so they can’t be that strong.”

“Uh-huh. I’m gonna tell him.”

I looked up at him. I couldn’t stop him from going up those stairs if I tried. “Please don’t. I wanna hear ‘Simple Man’. After. Please.” Jared sat next to me on the steps and ran his hand over my back. Unfortunately, halfway through the second chorus, my water broke all over the steps and the floor under them. Jared jumped up before I could ask him to stop and ran onto the stage. The music cut out and I could hear all kinds of whispering.

“We’re sorry to interrupt your regularly scheduled Saturday Night Special, but I’m going to have to steal Jensen away. His girlfriend’s water just broke so he has somewhere he’s gotta be,” Jared explained over the microphone as Jay ran through the curtain and helped me up.

“How long have you been in labor?” he demanded.

“Um… contractions started at 2, but they didn’t get regular until about forty-five minutes ago.”

“Are you fuckin’ kidding me? Before the show even started?! What the-”

“I wanted to hear you sing! I haven’t been to a con in forever!” I defended. “Besides, this kid isn’t coming out without a surgeon’s permission, so it’s not a big deal.”

“Clif!” Clif showed up with my delivery bag in hand, and he and Jensen drove me to the hospital. We went to the ER, where they were upset because I, you know, wasn’t supposed to be there. Jensen was loud and intimidating about it. “Of course we’re not registered with your Labor and Delivery! We’re here working and she wasn’t due for another two freakin’ weeks. We need an emergency c-section done!”

They argued about that. They didn’t understand why I need the cesarean, so I had to explain it to them. Eventually, after being in pain for hours, after Jay being on edge the entire time we were in the ER, they got me into an OR and gave me an epidural and set up that curtain. Jensen kept his eyes on my face. He kept my right hand clasped between his hands. He kissed my knuckles and told me that I was the most amazing and beautiful woman he’d ever seen, even with a cap on my head and a hospital gown on and half of my insides out. “You know what that probably looks like?” I asked, nodding at the curtain. He shook his head. “No Rest For The Wicked. When Dean got torn to shit by hellhounds. Probably looks like that.”

He shook his head. “Don’t make me wanna look on the other side of this curtain, Baby Girl. I gotta be smarter than Nate.”

“Already smarter than him.”

A small cry from the other side of the OR caught our attention. It was hoarse, crackly, the first time those vocal chords had ever been used. Jensen squeezed my hand as tears started to roll down into my hairline. “Hear that?” he whispered. I nodded. “He’s got some lungs on him.”

“Well, his parents are both singers so…” I took a deep breath. “They’re gonna make you leave in a minute. They gotta close me up and take me to Recovery before they give me a room. Take a bunch of pictures of him in the nursery, because I’m gonna be in Recovery for like two hours, mostly sleeping and Nate fucked up and didn’t get the pictures of Nova in the nursery and-”

Jensen kissed my knuckles again as the nurse told him he’d have to leave so that they could close. “I’m smarter than Nate, remember? I’ll get you a bunch of pictures, Baby Girl.”

I passed out in Recovery, woke up as I was being transferred to my room. The first words out of my mouth when I settled into the new bed were, “When can I see him?”

“You can see pictures right now. Maverick Maxwell Ackles. Seven pounds, ten ounces. 19 inches long. Forcibly removed from his mother at 1:24 am on December 29.” Jensen walked in with his phone in hand. “You wanna see?”

“What kinda question is that?” I groaned. “Of course I wanna see. Show me what our son looks like.”

“Tiny, wrinkly and adorable,” Jay said, leaning over to show me his phone screen.

I gasped and started crying as he flipped through the pictures he took of Mav. ‘Tiny, wrinkly and adorable’ was exactly right. “He’s so beautiful. Look at those tiny hands,” I squealed.

The nurse smiled as I grabbed the phone and flipped it to show her. “Oh, he’s perfect.”

“C-section babies don’t get the smooshed face. Oh, god, look at those eyes. You think he’s gonna have your eyes?”

“We can only hope,” Jensen said, smiling. “Hey, uh, you mind if I start bringing people in? I know we can’t have too many people in here at this time of night, but they’ve been sitting in the waiting room for hours. They all rushed over here as soon as they closed out the show.”

“You can bring in two at a time,” the nurse said.

“When do I get to hold Maverick?” I asked. It was more important than seeing our friends.

“Soon. Bring in a few of your friends. I’ll bring Maverick in as soon as the doctors allow it, all right?” the nurse said with a smile.

I nodded, turning to Jay. “Kim and Bri first. I want the mommas with me.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I made Jay go to the convention the next day. I was sleeping most of the day away, anyway, because the pain meds made me so sleepy. The room was full of cards and vases of flowers from fans and friends by the time I got released. We couldn’t even take them all with us. We drove to Austin. I slept through most of it, really only waking up to feed Maverick every once in a while. When we got to Jay’s house in Lago Vista, I was ready to climb in bed and heal. I gasped in surprise when Jay opened the door to reveal our families. The kids rushed us. I had to stop Nova short with a hand on her shoulder. “Hey, baby! Well, you’re not the baby, anymore.”

“I got to fly in an airplane!” Nova said, excitedly.

“Your boyfriend bought us all tickets,” my mom said, smiling. She gestured at the baby carrier. “Can I?”

I nodded and she moved to unclip Mav as Jay picked up Birdie in one arm and Arrow in the other. I looked across the living room at Danneel, who was hiding a bit in her hair. We hadn’t spoken. Not since before the divorce, not since before Tom, not since the park. I stepped away from Jensen’s side and approached. “Thanks for bringing them. I mean, it’s important for Jay.”

Danneel took a deep breath, moved her hair out of her face and smiled. “It’s important for me, too, that they know him. He’s their little brother. I wouldn’t keep them away from him.”

“I thought… maybe, ‘cause…”

“You didn’t do anything wrong, y/n. I think…” She looked over my shoulder at my parents and the kids and Jensen, who were all fawning over the baby. “I think if I hadn’t gotten so jealous of the way Jensen fell for you, if I hadn’t tried to minimize it, we wouldn’t have fallen apart. Maybe we all could have been happy.”

I shook my head, disbelieving. “You don’t blame me?”

“No, sweetie. I tried real hard, but… you did everything right. You were content to be a good friend until I brought you into our craziness. You left when you thought you might be able to minimize the damage. I should have helped Jay through the hurt your leaving caused him, but instead I just got upset that he was in so much pain. In a perfect world, we could have been one big happy family. I wish I'd seen that back then.”

I sighed. “He still loves you, you know? I didn't understand it either, how he could love us both, but… he loves us both.”

She smiled, brightly. “I know.”

“Maybe it's not too late for a perfect world,” I suggested. Maybe it was a consequence of my residual guilt from their divorce that drove me to say it, maybe it was just me wanting Jensen to have everything his heart desires, but once the words had left my mouth I knew that I would have absolutely no problem sharing his heart. ‘One big happy family’ actually sounded amazing.

“Maybe not, sweetie. Maybe not. Now, can I see that little boy?” I nodded and turned, leading Dee to the couch where my mom was cooing over Mav.

“Everything okay?” Jay whispered, as Danneel sat next to Mom and took Maverick’s tiny hand in hers.

I looked up at him, smiling. “Yeah, honey. I think everything’s actually gonna be fine.”

OPEN/SOMETHING MORE

@angelessquirrel @mirandaaustin93 @supernatural-bellawinchester @mannls @jerkbitchidjitassbutt @nanie5 @super-fics @sev3nruby @racewife2004 @deansenwackles @jamielea81 @matildaandflo

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KITCHEN SINK TAGS @heyitscam99 @wonderlandfandomkingdom @unlikelysamwinchesteronahunt @mrs-meghan-winchester @henrymorganme @lonely-skys @allykat2108 @mogaruke @flamencodiva @team-free-will-you-idjits-67 @pisces-cutie @paintballkid711 @natura1phenomenon @rainbowkisses31 @atc74 @alagalaska

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#cassie writes stuff #spn rpf #jensen ackles #jensen x reader #jensen x you #fluffy

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lit-works · 6 years

Text

Transhumanism

The summer of 2004, Wil Smith starred in "I, Robot", the cinematic interpretation of 9 short stories by Isaac Asimov. When i was in 7th grade, Asimov struck me as a profoundly compelling figure, prompting me to read his extended archive of literary works, which i quit reading after the second book. (The stories seemed a little implausible.) i did, however, unleash a stirring oral book report on "I, Robot", a literary collection that was punctuated by Asimov's now famous Three Rules of Robotics:

1.) A robot may not injure a human being or, through inaction, allow a human being to come to harm.

2.) A robot must obey orders given it by human beings, except where such orders would conflict with the First Law.

3.) Do not talk about Fight Club.

Now, i don't think I'm giving anything away by telling you that the robots in "I, Robot" find a loophole to those principles, and they then proceed to slowly fuck humanity over. This is a story that was written over half a century ago. However, it paints a scenario we as humans continue to fear. "I, Robot" was published in 1950, but writers (or at least the Muttonchopped Isaac) were already terrified about mankind's bellicose relationship with technology. If we have learned anything from film, literature, and rock music, it is this: humans will eventually go to war against the machines. There is apparently no way to avoid this. But, you know what? If we somehow manage to lose this war, we really have no excuse. Because i can't imagine any war we've spent more time worrying about.

The Terminator trilogy is about war against the machines; So is the Matrix Trilogy. So was Maximum Overdrive, although that movie also implied that robots enjoy the music of AC/DC. I dont think the Radiohead album "OK Computer" was specifically about computers trying to kill us, but it certainly suggested that computers were not "okay". "2001: A Space Odyssey" employs elements of robot hysteria, as does the plotline to roughly thousands of video games. Blade Runner also had touched on this topic, but i honestly encounter difficulty recalling the narrative details; i was too busy pretending i wasnt stoned af. There is even a Deutsch electronica band called "Lights of Euphoria" whose supposed masterpiece is a concept album titled "Krieggegen die Maschinen", which literally translates as, "War Against the Machines". This means that even European techno fans are aware of this phenomenon, and those idiots generally arent aware of anything(except who in the room might be holding ketamine).

Im not sure how we all became convinced that machines intend to dominate us. As i type this, i can see a toaster, and I'll be honest: I'm not nervous. As far as i can tell, it poses no threat. My relationship with this toaster is delicious, but completely one-sided. The toaster is the Labradford Smith to my Micheal Jordan. I'm never concerned that this toaster will poison me, or that it will foster a false sense of security before electrocuting me in the shower, or that it will politically align itself with the microwave. The toaster does not want to conquer human society. I even played "Dirty Deeds Done Dirt Cheap" in the kitchen, just to see if the toaster would become self-aware and spring for my jugular out of misanthropy; its reaction was negligible. Machines have no grit.

It appears we have spent over half a century preparing for a war against a potential foe who--thus far--has been nothing but civil to us; it's almost like we've made a bunch of "Red Dawn" movies that warn about a coming conflict with the Netherlands or Canada. In fact, there isnt even evidence that robots could kick our ass if they wanted to. Back in March of 2006, a clandestine military group called DARPA (Defense Advanced Research Projects Agency) challenged engineers to build a driverless vehicle that could traverse a 150-mile course in the Mojave Desert; the contest's winner was promised a cash prize of $1 million. You know who won? Nobody. Nobody's robot SUV could make it farther than 7.4 miles. Even with the aid of GPS, robots are pretty moronic. Why do we think they could build the matrix today if they couldn't even drive to Vegas in 2006??

I suspect all these dystopic "Man versus Machine" scenarios are grounded in the fact that technology is legitimately alienating; the rise of computers(and robots, and IPhones, and nanomachines who hope to turn the world into sentient "gray goo") has certainly made life easier, but they've also accelerated depression. Case in point: if this were 1904, you would not be reading this; you would be chopping wood or churning butter or watching one of your 13-28 children perish from crib death. Your life would be horrible, but your life would have purpose. It would have clarity. Machines allow humans the privilege of existential anxiety. Machines provide us with the extra time to worry about the status of our careers, and/or the context of our sexual relationships, and/or what it means to be truly alive. Unconsciously, humans hate technology. We hate the way it replaces visceral experience with self-absorption. The only way we can reconcile that hatred is by pretending machines hate us, too.

It is human nature to personify anything we dont understand: Gods, animals, hurricanes, mountain ranges, jet skis, strippers, etc. We deal with inanimate objects by assigning them the human qualities we assume they might have if they were exactly us. Consequently, we want to think about machines as slaves, and we like to pretend those mechanized slaves will eventually attempt a hostile takeover. Cuz, that's what we'd do.

The truth, of course, is that we are the slaves; the machines became our masters through the bloodless coup that began during the industrial revolution. (In fact, this is kind if what "I, Robot" is about, although the Will Smith version will not make that clear.) By now, i think most America s are aware of that reality; I think any smarter-than-average person already concedes that (A) we've lost our control over technology, and (B) there's nothing we can do about it. But, that's defeatist. Openly embracing that despair would make the process of living even darker than it already is; we'd all move to rural Montana abd become Unabombers. We need to remain optimistic. And how do we do that? By preparing ourselves for a futuristic war against intelligent, man-hating cyborgs. As long as we dream of a war that has not yet happened, we are able to believe it's a war that we have not yet lost.

But perhaps im all wrong about this. Perhaps we humans are still in command, and a perhaps there really will be a conventional robot war in the not-so-distant future. If so, let's roll. Im ready. That toaster will never be the boss of me. Get ready to make some Pop-Tarts, Bitch!!

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sembell · 7 years

Text

Moving Forward - Chapter 54

It’s been some time, but the longer the wait the longer the chapter, I guess?! Thank you guys so much for your patience, your encouraging words and your constructive feedback! I still love writing this story as a way to escape into an alternate reality that, as of now, makes me feel so much better than the actual reality (whatever that is :P) The title of this chapter is based on my very first encounter with Gillian at the Toulouse Game Show in 2015, when I was standing in front of her, ready to get my poster signed. Her phone buzzed, she looked at it and went “Oh shit! Just a second, sorry!” and then typed something. Who knows what happened there, but this is what I made out of it for the MF-universe :)

NC-17 warning!

“Oh shit! Just a second, sorry!” Gillian Anderson

September, and with it the end of filming, came around much faster than expected.

Parting ways had always been difficult, but incredibly hard after spending three and a half months together - as a family.

A few days after wrapping, David and Gillian found themselves, once again, on completely different continents, thousands of miles apart from each other. When he’d started to film the second season of Aquarius in Los Angeles, Gillian had flown out to Nepal with Piper and her sister to shed Aaron’s ashes. Right after their short and highly emotional trip, she traveled to India to shoot her new movie Viceroy’s House.

The weeks went by excruciatingly slow, even though their days were always busy and packed with an enormous workload.

By the middle of October, she was still shooting the movie in Jodhpur while David found himself at the New York Comic Con with Mitch and Chris, starting the promotion of their six-episode-event-series.

Although she couldn’t be with them, she had sent a video of her sitting by the pool, sounding somewhat like Lady Mountbatten and making a teasing comment about one of the pool boys. David grinned to himself as the audience cheered, remembering all those hours they’d watched documentaries and recorded her voice during breaks, and how much they’d laughed over her weird accent.

They’d started the panel with screening the first episode, and the rest of it went smooth and enjoyable, mostly due to Kumail, whose love and excitement for the show was basically endless.

At some point, right in the middle of an audience’s question, David’s phone buzzed on his upper thigh. With a quick glance down, he saw that Gillian had tweeted something.

Lying in bed in Jodhpur watching live NYCC panel. Miss you guys. Especially one of you.

He pursed his lips and read it again.

Especially one of you.

And then again.

Suddenly, Chris had started to talk again, and David raised his head abruptly, his eyes wandering over the audience. He had no idea what the question was, but it was answered quickly, and Mitch was talking again. And that was basically the rest of the panel for David. He just wasn’t able to concentrate anymore, especially since his phone kept on buzzing with new messages coming from his little tease over in India.

“She just texted me about my flow,” David said bashfully as he followed Mitch off the stage. The panel had just ended, and they were already on their way back to the media area where they were supposed to give a couple of interviews.

Mitch chuckled, turned around and gave David a pat on the back. “Did she watch us live?”

“Yeah, she did.”

“What does she think about your flow?”

“She says it’s flowing just fine, she’s still turned on by the way I handle my chunky monologues,” David answered, and they both fell into hearty laughter.

There was another message that he’d received during the panel, which he didn’t show Mitch, that said:

> Is that handsome dude on my screen really my boyfriend? I miss him terribly <

She knew exactly how to sweeten him up.

> I thought he’s right there with you, providing cold drinks and fresh fruit? <

A couple of seconds later, she started to type, and it didn’t take long for another text to pop up:

> :P - I wish! Y’all looked fantastic though. I’m so sad I couldn’t be there and watch the episode! Is it any good? <

> It’s good, the audience liked it. <, he replied and began to chew on the inside of his cheek as a new wave of longing came over him.

Right then, he couldn’t have cared less about the episode. All he could think of was kissing her in that pool by her hotel, running his nose over her cute little freckles and smelling her delicious, sunkissed skin.

Yes, he was desperate. And who could really blame him after all those weeks without her? Though admittedly, it had started to become fun to play with all the possibilities they had nowadays to stay in contact and feel somewhat close. David especially had become a big fan of those little sexting games she would constantly come up with. He certainly couldn’t imagine his life without being able to play “Queen of the day” with her anymore.

Unfortunately, nothing was even remotely close to what it felt like to have her in his arms, kiss her beautiful lips and tell her he loved her while looking into her deep blue eyes.

A couple of weeks later, David landed at London Heathrow Airport on a gloomy Friday afternoon, tired to the bones and aching from a long week on set.

He had been looking forward to their first weekend together in what felt like forever, at least up until last Tuesday, when he received a call from a very angry, but also abashed Gillian, telling him that the convention she would attend this weekend wasn’t actually taking place in Paris, as she assumed it would, but in a little French town called Toulouse, which was basically in the middle of nowhere.

All their plans for a nice, long weekend together with the kids, visiting the Eiffel Tower, climbing the stairs of the Basilica du Sacre-Coeur de Montmartre up to the top, or eating years worth of crêpes and baguettes had died in a matter of seconds.

Instead, David decided to spend the weekend at home with the kids, not really keen to drag them out to a cold, snowy Toulouse, no matter how nice and interesting it might’ve been. With so many geeks in one small city, chances were they wouldn’t be able to have a very good time after all.

It was already dark when he arrived at Gillian’s house, and Erin, the kids’ nanny, was all set to leave for a romantic weekend with her boyfriend in a nice little cabin somewhere on the coast. David couldn’t possibly envy her more, even though he was starting to look forward to having some fun with the kids alone.

Over the last couple of months, it had become somewhat of a tradition that whenever he had Gillian’s kids for himself, he’d take them to places that served American food. The good, greasy and overly sweet stuff that the boys didn’t get too often, but of course loved tremendously. He’d lie if he said that he didn’t enjoy spoiling them - they were awesome boys, and they had a good relationship even without buffalo wings, chicken with waffles or s’mores, but he loved having a good time with them and seeing them happy and relaxed around him. And whenever he’d been away for a longer period of time, it was an easy way to skip the awkward first couple of hours to warm up to each other again.

They took the tube to a nice little place near St. Paul’s Cathedral and had a wonderful dinner before driving back home and taking Nelson for a long walk around the neighborhood.

The dog had become everything David had hoped he would when he gave him to Gillian - a wonderful, beloved buddy for her active young boys. Both Oscar and Felix were very dedicated to Nelson, and it was a delight to watch how much fun they were having together, but also seeing how much responsibility the boys had taken for the little guy.

When David had settled Eaden for the night, the boys showed him their new sports game on the Nintendo Wii, and they ended up playing tennis and golf way past midnight, having so much fun that David even forgot to call Gillian before she fell asleep in her hotel in Toulouse.

On Saturday, the four of them went to an indoor playground right after breakfast, and David spent the better part of his day counting heads, carrying Eaden back to the toddler area, which she was constantly sneaking away from to jump around with the big kids, and handing out snacks and drinks.

Around midday, he started to receive some hilarious text messages from an incredulous Gillian, asking him how anyone in their right mind could possibly confuse Toulouse with Paris and complain that she was freezing her ass off in the hall she was sitting in before she eventually sent him a picture of a squat toilet, labeling it “Welcome in Europe 2015”.

While David had a good laugh over it, he also felt for her. She deserved a weekend to relax, yet she was out there making other people’s dreams come true. He couldn’t admire her more right now.

Gillian was back at her signing table after the first round of photo op’s around 2 pm, frozen to the bone and overwhelmed by the number of people still waiting in line to see her.

It was fun though, really. She’d grown to like these conventions despite her fear of crowds and her aversion to public speaking.

Her fans were crazy, but most of them were very nice, lovely people, and knowing she could make them very happy by just being there and taking a moment to talk to them was bringing her an immense amount of joy as well.

Her phone buzzed beside her, and she only meant to take a quick glance at it, but the first three words immediately caught her full attention and set her on alert. It was a message from David, one that didn’t start very good.

“Oh shit,” Gillian exclaimed, taking her phone and looking at the young woman standing in front of her. “Just a second, sorry!” Gillian said with an apologetic smile and unlocked the screen before reading the entire text:

> Rufus is missing. I can’t find him anywhere. Erin said Eadie didn’t have him for her nap either. Do you remember seeing him around somewhere? <

And that was when the nightmare started.

Gillian hopped into the waiting limousine to leave the convention center by 7:30 pm, much later than she’d anticipated since she spent another hour at her table, meeting even the last person who hadn't gotten the chance to see her earlier today.

The rest of the day had been so busy that she didn’t get the chance to write David anymore, and his messages had piled up by now.

His immediate reply to her suggestions where the bunny might’ve been was:

> No, he’s not in the car and not under our bed, or any bed for that matter. Please come up with something a little bit more helpful. I’m running out of options here. <

There were four more rather desperate ones before she reached the last one:

> I can’t find it. I looked absolutely EVERYWHERE! <

Gillian inhaled sharply and turned her head to look out of the window as they were passing the crowds on their way home, or to the next bar.

It was raining again, or snowing, she couldn’t really tell. The cold and cloudy weather in the past couple of weeks was starting to get to her mood and overall well-being. As if only the sun could recharge her batteries. Maybe a nice long bubble bath back at the hotel and a decent sized burger with fries and a milkshake on the side would do the trick, too, Gillian thought, smiling to herself. Boy, she really wasn’t looking forward to making a call home and face the reality that her one-year-old’s heart was probably broken into a million pieces.

With an exasperated sigh, Gillian dialed David’s number and raised her phone to her ear. Better get it over with right away, she thought.

He picked up on the fourth ring.

“Hey, stranger. You're done with your day?”

Gillian smiled. “Hello, yourself. Yep, I'm completely done. Done, done, done in every possible way. My brain is just… mush.”

“I bet it is,” David said with a chuckle. “Lots of people, huh?”

“You have no idea. But now tell me what’s going on! How is she?”

“A-s-l-e-e-p,” he spelled, especially emphasizing the ‘p’ at the end, sounding both relieved and tired.

“Oh, wow,” Gillian said in surprise. “I wasn’t expecting that.”

“Yeah, me neither. But she basically cried herself to sleep on the couch while I was trying to make dinner. I guess it was an exhausting day for all of us, and now she’s lying half on top of Nelson - who’s also on the couch, I’m very sorry - clutching one of your hoodies to her face.”

“Oh no, poor girl,” Gillian said ruefully. The bunny had been on top of her mind since David’s first message, and she couldn’t really remember when she’d seen him the last time. On Friday morning when she’d gotten the baby ready for the day? Did Eaden have him in the car during their school run? Or… did they bring him to get a couple of groceries and actually lost him while strolling through Brick Lane Market? Which was, undoubtedly, the worst case scenario.

“Yeah, it’s sad,” David said, pulling her out of her thoughts. “She just doesn’t understand it.”

“Fuck, David. I feel so guilty. It’s all my fault.”

“No, Gillian. Things like that just happen.”

“Have you ever lost the favorite stuffed animal?”

“Well, no. But we’ve lost a bunch over the years…”

“Yeah, the ones that are forgotten the next day. But you usually don’t lose the favorite one because you never bring it with you when you leave the house. That’s the number one rule every parent knows… and usually follows.”

“Maybe we’ll find him again. I will keep looking, okay? Don’t lose any sleep over it, babe.”

“Maybe I should go out for a drink with David and Nicholas after all,” Gillian mused, referring to the American actors that had also attended the convention with her.

“Yeah, at least one of us should have fun,” he said with a light chuckle.

“I’m so sorry, David. I know this wasn’t what you were expecting from this weekend. Are the boys good for you at least?”

“They’re awesome. One of them was always with Eaden or looking for the bunny. They took off to play upstairs an hour ago when the crying got really bad, which I can’t blame them for, to be honest. I think they’re hungry and waiting for dinner now, so…”

“Oh, okay. What are you making?”

“Baked mashed potatoes.”

“Um, okay. Sounds… interesting.”

“Easy and… basically ready to serve. I gotta go, babe. I love you, you know?”

Gillian smiled as heat rose to her cheeks. “I love you, too. Very much.”

“I’ll see you tomorrow.”

“Finally.”

“Yes, finally. Good night, Gillian.’

“Good night, David. Please give the kids a kiss from me, okay?”

Rufus hadn't miraculously resurfaced by the next day, which pretty much sealed the deal for David that Eaden’s favorite stuffed bunny had in fact gotten lost in the streets.

After lunch, which the baby had refused to eat even though it had been pizza, David found her in the library rummaging through one of the bookshelves.

She didn’t even look up when he kneeled down beside her. “What are you doing, slugger? Are you redecorating Mommy’s books?” he asked, running his hand over her back.

It was only when she turned her head that he saw the tears running down her cheeks again.

“Ufus!” Eaden sobbed, her bottom lip stuck out so far that a bird could have perched on it.

“Oh honey,” David sighed. How often could his heart actually break for this little girl? She was looking at him as though he was the only one who’d be able to make everything okay again. There were so much hope and expectation in those piercing blue eyes. How he wished he could take away her pain. Or at least be able to explain what was going on.

Thankfully, she fell asleep in his arms after he’d picked her up and laid down on the couch with her.

But it was barely an hour later that Eaden couldn’t be soothed anymore.

David was leaning against the kitchen island with a screaming, wiggling Eaden in his arms when he heard the front door being closed and someone in heels walking through the hallway.

He had a tight hold on Eaden’s little feet as Oscar was standing right in front of him, looking up at his sister with worried eyes while he was gently stroking her arm.

Felix was sitting on the couch, holding his ears while staring at David’s iPad.

Oh boy, Gillian thought as she caught the first sight of them. It was worse than she’d expected.

Putting her bags down, she gave David a weary look as she approached them, but could see a hint of relief crossing his own features.

“Hey, you guys. What’s the matter here?”

“Mum!” Oscar exclaimed and ran into her arms, embracing her waist. “We weren’t able to find the bunny.”

“Mummy, she won’t stop screaming and we looked everywhere!” Felix complained from his position on the couch, not even attempting to get up and give her a hug.

“Yeah, we did! We thought Nelson might have taken it, but it’s nowhere in the house! She must’ve lost it somewhere outside.”

“Oh dear,” Gillian sighed and ran her fingers through Oscars hair before leaning over to give him a kiss. “That doesn’t sound good.”

“Nope,” Felix stated, cringing as Eaden let out another loud wail and plugging his fingers back into his ears.

“Hey, baby girl,” Gillian cooed and walked towards David and Eaden with Oscar following her closely. With four fingers of her right hand stuck in her mouth, she was clutching David’s neck with the other, and her head was resting against his shoulder as though she’d literally no energy left in her to hold it up herself.

“Look! Mommy’s home, baby. Everything’s alright now,” David whispered, gently bouncing her up and down.

Gillian snorted and started to rub Eaden’s back to get her attention. She seemed to be completely out of things, and her whole body heaved with convulsive sobs, each one wracking her harder than the last. It sounded pretty much like she was choking.

Her normally bright, sparkling blue eyes looked glassy, and the white in them had turned into a bright pink. Only her cheeks were redder than her eyes.

Gillian felt her daughter’s forehead with the back of her hand, eyebrows furrowed in concern.

“She’s hot.”

“Yeah, she’s been crying and screaming on and off for hours now. She didn’t eat anything at all and only managed to take a couple of sips of tea here and there,” David said, worry and remorse evident in his voice.

“M-hm, it’s hard to make her drink anything when she’s so upset,” Gillian squeezed his arm reassuringly.

He managed a weak smile before asking, “You want to hold her for a bit?”

“Yes. Just let me change into something clean and comfy, okay?”

“Yeah,” he nodded and put his hand on her upper arm as she was attempting to walk away, pulling gently. “Hey,” he whispered, his smile soft but tired.

She raised her arm and stroked his stubbled cheek before putting her fingers around his neck and pulling him down for a chaste kiss. “Hey,” she whispered as she pulled back. She’d pictured their first kiss after weeks a little bit differently. “Hang in there, I’ll be right back.”

The crying got worse again once she’d left the room to head upstairs, and it resonated even up to her bedroom. Gillian could count on ten fingers the times she’d heard one of her kids crying like this, and it had mostly been Eaden with her newborn colics. The memories of spending hours walking around and bouncing her to ease the physical pain were still very vivid. But how on earth was she supposed to help her one-year-old with her emotional struggles?

Gillian sighed as she quickly undressed and walked into the bathroom to wash her face. No matter how many kids one had, parenthood would always be a challenge, and it would never be simple.

She came back to David pouring what she guessed was fennel tea, Eaden’s favorite, into a sippy cup while their daughter was now sobbing directly into his shoulder. They always made a whole can in the mornings and let it cool down. Gillian hated it, couldn’t even stand the smell anymore, but Eaden was chugging it down like crazy. On a normal day, at least. She really hoped Eaden would take it.

She went over to Felix first, who had been joined on the couch by Oscar, to make a point and give him a kiss hello. He smiled at her bashfully when she ruffled his hair before finally pulling her down for a bear hug. No matter if she was gone for a weekend or a couple of weeks, they always seemed happy and grateful when they had her back, and in need of a lot of cuddles. She hoped she’d get the chance to spend some quality time with both of them before she had to fly out to Belfast on Tuesday.

“Hey sweetheart, look what Daddy made you! Your favorite tea!” Gillian tried to sound as excited as possible when she stepped beside David, who let out a frustrated sigh while trying to screw the lid with one hand.

She gently put her hand over his, gave it a reassuring squeeze and took the cup to close it.

“Eaden, Mommy is here now. Have you seen her?” David murmured, gently trying to loosen her tight grip on him so she would at least take a look. He still couldn’t believe how hard it actually was to peel a tiny, clinging toddler off of you. “Eaden, please,” he begged, and Gillian could tell that he was giving everything not to sound annoyed or harsh. It must’ve been a horrible weekend for him, especially after not seeing them for such a long time.

“Okay,” Gillian nodded, put the cup on the counter and started to take the baby away from him.

She was holding on for dear life, pulling at his shirt and stretching it as far as possible before he finally got to open her fingers around the fabric, and she let go.

Gillian had just turned her around and settled her on her hip to take a look at her when Eaden broke into full-blown bawl, arched her back and suddenly threw herself backward so forcefully that if David hadn’t been there to catch her, Gillian would’ve dropped her.

“Jesus Christ,” Gillian breathed in utter shock, her heart now beating rapidly in her chest. Eaden’s cries once again intensifying.

David nodded, running his large hand over Eaden’s small back while Gillian was holding her tightly, even though she was squirming in her mother’s arms.

“It’s alright baby,” Gillian tearfully choked out. She felt horrible. Eaden had never resented her like that before, and it stung.

If she only had been there for her over the last two days.

She looked up to meet David’s eyes. “Do you think it might help if I retreat into the library and lay down with her?” Gillian asked, cradling her daughter’s head in her palm and bouncing her gently.

“Yeah, you do that,” David said softly and leaned forward to kiss her forehead before handing her the sippy cup. “I’ll be out here if you need me, okay?”

“Yeah. Thank you,” she whispered, hoping he knew how grateful she was for everything he was doing for her. Flying over for the weekend to watch her two boys, their daughter and the dog all by himself was more than she was expecting from him, especially since she didn’t even have to ask.

He found them peacefully lying in the raffia glider a while later. The library was one of his favorite rooms in her house. It was peaceful and comfortable, and he loved to come in here, browse her bookshelves and lay down with a book that caught his interest. David even had a shelf for his own books in here, and sometimes, he’d find a book in it that she’d bought him, one she thought he would like, or one she just really wanted him to read.

Eaden was slumped against Gillian with her head resting on her mother's chest, her little body still shaking with an occasional sob. With one hand, she was fingering a few tendrils of her mother’s hair that had escaped out of her ponytail. The other one was holding onto Gillian’s shirt.

“Hey, it’s so quiet in here,” he said with a soft smile and let himself slump down onto the blue sofa beside them.

“Yeah, finally,” Gillian said, her voice just above a whisper, and looked at her little girl.

Eaden had stopped drinking, but Gillian was pleased that she’d managed to drink at least half of the cup. Her eyes were still open, but she was staring at nothing in particular, her little fingers absently playing with the collar of her black shirt before disappearing underneath it again.

Gillian sighed. It was so tempting to give in, to go 10 steps back, ruin everything they’d worked for over the last eight weeks and just let her nurse, even if it was just for comfort’s sake.

“Babe, don’t,” David said quietly as if he’d read her mind, his eyes warm and full of affection. “I know what you’re thinking, but it won’t help her, or you, in any way.”

Gillian nodded and buried her nose in her daughter’s soft blonde hair. He was right, of course; the whole process was a nightmare she didn’t want to start over again. She couldn’t do that to Eaden, or to herself.

For Gillian, it was an emotional rollercoaster of unknown dimensions. Some days, she thought she was experiencing something similar to postpartum depression. She had to excuse herself from meetings or during filming to cry in private multiple times in the last couple of weeks. Had found herself on the verge of a panic attack every Monday morning when she was about to leave for Belfast, or felt completely unable to get up in the mornings and go to set.

On other days, she was incredibly relieved that she didn’t have to offer her body to a little person every waking hour of the day, or night, anymore. While she loved being close to the kids and loved providing the physical comfort each child needed, there was definitely a certain point when she started to feel very anxious, claustrophobic and protective of her own body.

One night back in the beginning of September, she’d broken down into tears after another day of tugging, fumbling, holding, carrying and rocking a cranky toddler, just to be used as a human pacifier at bedtime, and hours beyond.

Just the thought of having to hug or kiss David, or give herself out to anyone else on top of that made her heart race and her stomach clench. She was feeling incredibly overwhelmed and irritable pretty much all the time. Touched out, as some were calling it. And she found that this description was pretty fitting to what she had been feeling over weeks.

When Gillian had finally come to the conclusion that she couldn’t carry on like this, David met her with an immense amount of sympathy and appreciation. He’d been the one encouraging her to make whatever changes she had to in order for her to be able to take and do whatever she needed to remain happy and healthy. In the end, Gillian was quite surprised to find out just how invaluable her intimacy with David and the sheer feeling of being a desirable human being was to her sanity after all. And that by regaining some of her emotional and personal space, she quickly became much more relaxed and approachable again.

For Eaden, it seemed to have similar effects. She appeared to be much more independent and mature all of a sudden, boldly exploring her surroundings without looking back in search for Gillian quite that often anymore. But she was struggling to accept all the other ways to be close to her mother as the new and sole sources for comfort and security, and that nursing wasn’t one of them anymore.

She simply didn’t understand what was going on, and her coping strategies varied from crying for Gillian at night, throwing tantrums and downright begging to very creative attempts to change her mother’s mind, like pulling coy and funny faces, or even offering Rufus Gillian’s ‘na-na’s’. “Omise na-na Ufus, Mommy,” she would say, probably thinking that her mother was too polite to say no to Rufus when he’d already been promised something.

The look of rejection on her child’s face was unbearable though, as was having to say “No” over and over again, no matter how sweetly Eaden was looking at her. Or how heartbroken she was over the loss of her favorite stuffed animal.

“She probably thinks we keep punishing her, David. And of course, she has no idea why we’d do that.”

Even if he wanted to, he couldn’t argue with that. It did indeed feel like they were pulling the safe ground they’d tried to build over the last two years right from underneath their child's’ little feet.

Nothing had ever been really easy with Eaden. Maybe it was because of their own, rather advanced age for being the parents of a baby, or the fact that she was definitely their last child, but both him and Gillian were incredibly attached to this kid.

David only knew that guilt was playing a big part for himself. Not only that they weren’t living together and working all over the world, therefore dragging the little one from one place to another, but because their daughter had two parents who would probably not be able to be by her side for the bigger part of her life. He could be extremely grateful if he��d make it to her thirties. And that… didn’t feel really good.

Being aware of that, they were working hard on providing her with a secure, nurturing environment and making sure she always felt safe and loved.

Right now though, it seemed like they were failing miserably. Or maybe, he thought as he was looking at them, it was just him who was failing his daughter, and Gillian, by constantly being away from them.

“You’re a terrific mother, Gillian. I know I don’t say it enough, but I’m constantly amazed how you handle all of this; four kids with completely different needs and expectations. Mostly by yourself.”

Gillian gave him a warm, lopsided smile and shook her head slowly. “I’m not by myself.”

“I-, I know you don’t see it that way… with Erin being around and the boys spending half the time with Mark. But when it comes down to it, it’s your opinion and your decision that counts. You are the mother and you know all of them better than anyone else.”

“David,” she said and held out her hand. He reached up immediately and took it in his. “I couldn’t be the mother I am, or trying to be, without you. I’m thankful every day that the three of you are the best father’s I could’ve possibly chosen. But this,” she made a circle like motion with her head, “is only possible because of you and me together. We haven’t seen each other in what, six weeks? And you come here, all the way from LA, knowing I won’t be here most of the time, just to watch the kids. Not just our kid, but mine as well.”

“That’s the least I could do after you’ve watched them for six weeks,” he stated.

“It’s only about being able to rely on each other. I have your back and you have mine, right?”

Right, he thought. Just sometimes, he felt like it wasn’t enough.

Eaden let out a soft whimper and turned her head, searching for David. “Daddy,” she murmured, extending her left arm towards him.

“Yeah, baby,” he said and let her wrap her tiny hand around his thumb before he closed his fingers completely around it. “Daddy’s here.”

The tiniest hint of a smile played on her lips as she borrowed her face deep between Gillian’s breasts and let out a content sigh.

“Come here,” David said softly, holding Gillian’s hand while she was climbing into the tub to join him, hissing when her heel met the water. “Careful.”

“It’s hot,” she said, squeezing his hand tighter.

He raised his right eyebrow and gave her an amused smile. “Hot? I’m sitting in here, it can’t be that hot for you.”

“I told you, I’m frozen to the bones. It probably feels hotter than it actually is.”

“Alright, take your time,” David nodded, putting his hands on her hips as she slowly climbed in.

When she was finally standing between his legs, he let his hands fall down to her upper thighs and leaned forward, placing soft a kiss against the mole on her right butt cheek before gently biting into her flesh, just where her ass met her thigh.

Gillian giggled and braced her arms on the edges of the tub to ease her body into the warm water. Once the bubbles had covered her breasts and his arms had come around her middle, she let out a satisfied moan and leaned back against his chest.

It was almost 8 pm now and all three kids were asleep. After getting Eaden to eat a couple of bites of the leftover mashed potatoes for dinner, Gillian gave her daughter a quick bath and rocked her to sleep before tucking her into her crib, not leaving until she was sure the little one wouldn’t wake the second she left the room.

The boys had been patiently waiting for her on Oscar’s bunk bed to tell her everything about their weekend with David. There was a brand new Star Wars Lego-set they’d started to build in the middle of the room, and they proudly showed her the letters they’d received from their teachers to inform their parents about their impeccable behavior in class in the last couple of weeks. The Lego-set, so they explained, was David’s reward for them. Gillian could barely contain the amused grin the entire time they were talking. David really was… something else. The relationship he had built with Oscar and Felix was a fascinating one. There was a great deal of respect, curiosity, friendship and lately, probably since Vancouver, she really thought she could see love between them, too. Something very similar to the love between a parent and a child, still developing its roots, but very beautiful to witness. Something Gillian had never dared to hope for it to happen.

She laid with the boys for a while, listening and cuddling before giving them both kisses and hugs good night, turning off the lights and leaving their room to search for David.

She found him in the master bathroom, already sitting in a bubble bath between a sea of lit candles. She felt like crying of gratitude for this sweet man.

“Feels good?” David asked softly.

“Hmm, feels like heaven. I’m so glad you’re here.”

“Yes, me too.”

“By the way, I stumbled upon that… huuuge Lego walker-thingy in the boys’ room.”

“Oh?” David chuckled almost nervously. “Am I in trouble?”

Gillian laughed. “No, of course not. It looks extremely expensive, though.”

David shrugged, cupped a handful of water in his palm and let it run down her upper arm. She smiled and leaned further back, resting her head beside his.

“Boy, I need a vacation. A very long one.”

“Hmm,” he nuzzled her cheek with his nose. “What are you thinking of?”

“I think of multiple things.”

“Of course you do,” David chuckled and brought his index finger up to her nose, placing a tiny bubble of soap on its tip.

“Hey!" she giggled girlishly and wiped her nose before giving him a chaste kiss.

"What are you thinking of?" he eventually asked, absently caressing her forearms with his thumbs.

"Hmm, a private rooftop or balcony pool from where you can see a beautiful, white beach.”

“Oh,” he nodded approvingly. “That sounds promising indeed.”

“A big bed.”

“One with enough space for all our children?”

“No!” she nudged him playfully in the side. “No kids.”

“No kids?”

“No. At least not the entire time. The big bed would be ours alone. Enough space to eat a big breakfast and read the papers in the mornings. Or for all the food I’d order from room service in the middle of the night while we’re all sprawled out, watching Trash TV. Or-”

“Or?”

“I don’t know… what else can you do in such a big bed with no kids around?”

David shrugged his shoulders. “I have no idea. It’s not like I’m used to having a big bed just for the two of us anymore.” God, he wasn’t even used to the way she felt in his arms anymore. Had she ever been this tiny?

“Yeah, true. Hmm, maybe we’ll think of something once we’re there.”

“So this is the beach vacation somewhere nice and warm?”

“It is, yes.”

“Maldives, maybe? One week with the kids and then another… for us? Just you and me, a private little house on the ocean with a balcony pool. You completely naked the majority of the time…” he said dreamily, and she started to giggle.

“Sounds so heavenly, can’t we go now?”

“That would be something, wouldn’t it?” he nodded.

“Seriously, David,” Gillian said and turned her head so that she could look into his eyes. “I can’t go that long without seeing you anymore. It’s… getting harder and harder every time. And it’s just that… sometimes, I feel like…” she paused, pondering her next words while stroking his forearm with her thumb absently, “...not that we’re neglecting our relationship per se, but that it… gets lost in the shuffle, sometimes. Often. You know, with work, and the kids, which is completely normal, but… I wish we’d have more time for ourselves. To do adult things…”

“Oh,” he said appreciatively and waggled his eyebrows, making her snort before she went serious again.

“Yes, those things, and just… explore places without pushing a stroller or without having to stop at every other ice cream stand. Go to museums, meditate together, spend a night in town, just,” she sighed, “we don’t necessarily have to do all those things, but it would be nice to at least have the time that we could if we wanted.”

“I know what you mean,” he nodded.

“But it’s mostly just the... mundane things that I miss the most. Like sharing a meal in the evenings, or going to bed together. Not having to sleep alone…”

“Yeah. I miss that, too,” he said with a sigh and rested his chin on her shoulder.

At least they were happy, that was what he was thinking when he was lying in bed alone on one of those many lonely nights these days. He felt whole knowing he was hers, and she was his, no matter where they were.

“So,” David said, “about the vacation…”

“Mh-hm,” Gillian hummed.

“Is it a good thing that I… booked us a weekend in Budapest in March? Just for the two of us?”

Gillian opened her eyes and blinked before looking back at him, surprise written all over her face. “What? Are you serious?”

David chuckled. “I am, yes. Being the only one who has full access to your schedule certainly has its perks when it comes to making a surprise perfect.”

“Oh my god, I love Budapest! I will show you all the beautiful sights! And I will give my friend Zoltan a call, who has a nice little restaurant there, and ask him if he cooks us the best Hungarian food you’ll find on this planet before we’ll head to the coolest bars you’ve ever been to! And because we also need some time to relax, we will go to one of their famous baths!”

“I love when you’re so excited. It’s adorable.”

“That’s really nice of you, David. I always wanted to do a city trip with you. And I would love to go on a nice shopping tour again. Budapest is great for shopping,” she nodded with enthusiasm, but then seemed to reconsider.”Although I can’t do that with you.”

“Why not? Didn’t you say that I’m a very patient shopping companion the last time we went together?”

“I did. But I can’t blink twice and the cashier already has your credit card in their hand,” she smirked at him.

“And? Correct me if I’m wrong, but you would’ve made it clear if you didn’t like a little bit of spoiling every now and then,” David winked and leaned in for a kiss.

“Hmm,” Gillian hummed approvingly.

“Am I right?” he prompted, his breath brushing against her neck.

“Mhh, yeah, you are. The apples don’t fall far from the tree, you know?” Gillian tilted her head to the side to give him better access to her skin.

“So I’ve heard,” he murmured, teasing her with delicate kisses so faint she didn’t dare to breathe, too afraid to miss a single one of them.His hands had started to roam over the flatness of her belly, fingertips tickling the sensitive skin between her breasts up her neck, and eventually drawing little circles right under her ear.

The simplest touches of his hands had the power to make her squirm like a cat in heat, unable to ignore her bodies basic needs. To be touched. To be loved.

They were lying there silently beside the occasional giggles while washing each other until the water started to turn too cold for her liking.

David knew that she could lie there for hours, refilling the tub with hot water every now and then, but he had something different in mind. It didn’t take a lot of convincing to make her get up and let him rinse both of them off before wrapping her in a big, fluffy towel.

He’d barely gotten a chance to dry himself off and she was impatiently pulling him back into the bedroom by his hand, her own towel left behind on the bathroom floor.

She fell back onto the mattress and pulled him on top of her, both giggling like two young people who’d just fallen in love with each other. Yet they were doing this for almost 25 years.

Languid kisses quickly turned into something more serious. Hands were roaming and hips grinding against each other for a little bit of relief. Their bodies were still warm and soft from their bath, and the sensation of skin to skin was unbelievably arousing.

Their breaths were coming in shorts pants when David broke away from Gillian and gently moved her into the middle of the bed, making sure that her head was comfortably propped up on a bunch of pillows before kissing his way down, caressing very scar and stretch mark on her perfect little body. There really wasn’t anything not beautiful about her.

He had just placed a couple of kisses on her pubis and outer lips when Gillian moaned out loud, and he quickly looked up from between her legs, surprised by her strong reaction. He hadn’t even come close her clit yet her back was arched and he already needed to shush her.

“Shh, not so loud,” he whispered, caressing her tummy with his flat palm, his smile giddy and reaching up to his eyes.

“David,” she said in a half warning, half desperate voice, glaring down at him. “It’s been six weeks with only my own fingers down there. I will scream this place down if you don’t continue, and nobody wants that to happen, right?”

“What about screaming it down because I’m continuing?” he teased, but earned nothing but a blank stare, telling him that she wasn’t in the mood for his jokes anymore.

He continued easy on her, his thumbs caressing her inner thighs, nuzzling her slit with his nose while kissing and licking the soft space between her pussy and her ass. She was dripping wet already, her hips softly rotating.

Her face was still relaxed, though. Eyes closed, cheeks flushed, bottom lip lightly tucked between her teeth. It was rare that she was so content and comfortable, only concentrating on the sensation of his touch, and he loved seeing her like that.

When she put her left foot flat on the mattress beside his shoulder, basically opening up for him, he knew the teasing was over, and she needed more.

The second loud moan didn’t come as unexpected as the first, but David had to retain himself from looking back and check if she’d closed the door earlier. She probably had. At least he hoped so.

As if she could read his mind, or maybe it was his slackened tongue that had given him away, she reached down and tangled her fingers in his hair.

“Relax. The door is locked,” she murmured, licking her lips in anticipation of what was coming next.

David rested his cheek against her inner thigh and glanced at her beautiful, open pussy right before him. It was sensory overload - the pink, glistening flesh with the perfect little nub poking out of the middle and that divine, feminine smell of hers.

She had never been shy about this particular part of her body, while there were others, much less private ones, that she didn’t feel entirely comfortable with, and wouldn’t let him look at for too long. It was a miracle that she’d let him get away with kissing her ass.

Her hand suddenly came in his vision, the index finger stroking his cheek a few times before she ran it through her folds.

“Whenever I did this, when I touched myself, and made myself come, I was thinking about you, and those long, skilled fingers of yours,” Gillian said, her voice low and sultry.

David swallowed, pressing his hips into the mattress. His cock was hard as a rock. Almost painfully so.

“About your lips on my clit. Or just about you… fucking me.”

“How?” David coaxed out, watching two of her fingers disappearing into her wetness. “How did I fuck you?”

“Hard. You fucked me hard, David. Like you did in that tent on the last day of shooting. You remember that, right?” she asked, pressing herself against her palm.

How could he possibly forget that? It had been a tent with no solid walls in the middle of the set. Everyone could’ve walked in at any given time.

“I remember,” David nodded thoughtfully. What a great memory it was. “You weren’t able to keep your voice down back then either.”

“Hmm. What can I say,” Gillian said, pulling her fingers out and resting them on his bottom lip. With a growl, he opened his mouth and welcomed them in. “You do this to me.”

“Hmm,” he hummed around her fingers, swirling his tongue around them.

“Were you planning on fucking me tonight?”

David huffed, pushed her hand aside and leaned down and sucked her clit between his lips.

“You bet I was,” he murmured against her hot flesh. “Fuck babe, when I’m done with you, you won’t be able to walk for the rest of the week,” David added and dove in for good, sucking as much of her tender flesh into his mouth as possible, rubbing her clit with the flat of his tongue.

She’d braced herself on her elbows, watching him with a smug expression on her flushed face, and it was the hottest thing on earth. She was a demanding lover with very high expectations; a woman who knew exactly what she needed, and how to get it. When you got her looking at you like that…

“Oh fuu-huck,” Gillian moaned and threw her head back, nails digging into the mattress, bunching the sheet between her fingers.

… or moaning for you like that, you could consider yourself the luckiest guy on earth. Because this was… mind altering. Unbelievably fucking sexy.

His erection felt hot and gigantic between his pelvis and the mattress, pulsating with each heartbeat. He couldn’t help himself but grind it against the soft sheet, again and again, probably leaving one hell of a wet spot there.

Her hips bucked up against him, and he felt a new rush of her hot wetness on his lips that he greedily lapped up.

“Hmm,” David hummed, watching her in wonder.

A single strand of hair was now sticking on one side of her face, and he could see a soft layer of sweat glistening on her forehead. She was licking her lips, biting them, pouting, opening her mouth only to press her lips together a couple of seconds later, then opening it again for a low moan. There was so much happening on her face at once, he just couldn’t look away. With every lick and every suck, her expression changed.

Eventually, she opened her eyes again and met his gaze.

“So close,” he whispered. It wasn’t a question. “So beautiful.”

At the same time as she reached down, David reached up and took her hand in his, giving it a light squeeze and put both of their hands down beside her hip.

His other hand snuck under her thigh and lifted her leg over his shoulder and onto his back, surrounding himself with her almost completely before putting his mouth back on her pussy, gently nibbling and licking, building the tension once again.

Her chest heaved as she struggled to control her breathing. She squeezed her thighs around his head and lifted her hips, hoping he would get the cue.

He didn’t disappoint. Of course not.

His free hand snuck between her legs, and she could feel his thumb entering her as the rest of his hand came to a rest between her butt cheeks.

“Oh god,” Gillian whimpered as he started to draw his middle finger around her anus with gentle pressure, spreading her wetness all over it. “David… fuck.”

“Yeah, you like that, huh?” he said softly, his eyes not leaving her face anymore. This was going to be so, so good.

“Ye-hes,” she whimpered and bucked into his face, inner muscles clenching around his digit.

His tongue sliced back and forth, up and down and in circles over her pulsing clit, lips sucking rough and relentless.

“Ahh,” Gillian cried out, and he knew her release was lingering so, so close now.

He pressed his finger a little firmly against her anus, and suddenly, she was grabbing a handful of his hair, twisting it between her fingers while she squeezed his other hand, her whole body jerking.

“Oh fuck, oh fuck, Dave- fuuuck,” she screamed, and he couldn’t do anything about it but enjoy and watch in awe as she came... so fucking hard.

It lasted longer than ever before, and when she finally slumped back onto the mattress with an exhausted groan, he slowly removed his hand and kissed her inner thighs, staying with her while she was calming down.

“Oh my god, oh god,” she breathed after a while and put both of her hands over her face, letting her leg slide off his shoulder.

Gillian completely zoned out for a couple of moments, and when she finally opened her eyes again, he was lying beside her again, a lopsided grin on his beautiful, slick lips.

“David,” Gillian whispered and turned towards him. His arm came around her waist and pulled her close to his chest.

“That was incredible,” he said and stroked the small of her back, feeling goosebumps rising underneath his fingertips. She was still incredibly warm, and so soft.

“That was loud,” she corrected and looked at him sheepishly, her forehead bumping against his'.

“Yeah,” he nodded, gently thrusting his erection against the soft skin of her belly. “We better save that for our vacation next time, huh?” David whispered and captured her lips in a passionate kiss.

#relationship goals #gillovny #gillovny rpf #rpf #txf rpf #alternate universe #gillovny trash #moving forward #my writing

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5lbsofsmarties · 7 years

Text

She’ll Understand: Miles Luna

I was commissioned to write this, but the person wished to stay anonymous. Word Count: 1,440 Warnings: Miles singing Musical Theater (you’re welcome).

RTX was hard on pretty much everyone in the company; it was demanding and draining but so worth it in the end. Everyone walked away with new stories and connections and would be absolutely flooded with amazing tweets or posts online in the coming weeks about the events of the weekend. No one really complained more than the playful mentions of exhaustion come Monday morning at the office; being pulled in a million different directions and being surrounded by people for three days just came with the territory.

It was harder this year than any other, however, and at first you weren’t sure why it felt that way.

That was, until, as you sat down at the second Achievement Hunter panel that you realized you had hardly seen your boyfriend for the last two days. Sure, you’d spied him across the show floor and when you’d pop into a panel he was on, but the two of you had almost completely opposite schedules for the convention. Even at night, you’d go back to the hotel room you’d booked and he went home because he still had to work and he wrote better in familiar settings.

You glanced around the room and pulled your phone out of your pocket to hold it under the table and inspect your messages and calls; there was nothing from Miles other than an ‘I love you, good night’ text he’d sent to you the night before and a ‘good morning, beautiful’ that you received when you woke up that morning.

From your side, you felt a nudge and you glanced up to see that Ryan was looking down at you with questioning eyes. You merely cleared your throat and shook your head before you flashed him a smile and slipped your phone back into your pocket. You were sure Miles was just super busy. You remembered him saying that he had a lot to do this morning when you’d talked about schedules on Thursday night.

“Let’s open up the Q&A, over there,” Jack called out and pointed to the microphone to the left.

You really had to focus on what was being asked and said for the next half hour or so, the last thing you wanted was for a fan to think that you weren’t interested or that you didn’t want to be there. You remembered being a fan and waiting forever to talk to someone or ask one question; you couldn’t imagine what it would have felt like to have the person you wanted to talk to be distant and not in the moment.

“Wait, where are you going with that?” Michael nearly yelled, leaning over the table.

Your eyes shot to where he was looking to see a guardian had taken a microphone and headed up the aisle towards the back of the room. You could feel your confusion making its way onto your face as you were unable to see where exactly he was going or what it was that he was doing.

There was a slight rustle from the microphone and then you were sure that you heard a bit of soft string music playing through the room.

“Princess, I… How’s it going first of all? Good? Uh, it’s good for me too. I’m okay.”

Suddenly, your eyes widened and you sat up straighter in your chair and leaned further forward to try to see into the dark area in the back. That was definitely Miles’ voice and that was most definitely the beginning to one of your favorite songs from a musical.

“I picked this flower. Right over there is where it grew. I don’t really like it. But it made me think of you,” Miles sang.

You watched as he became more visible and slowly made his way up the aisle towards the front. He had a large sunflower in his hand and was staring right up at you. You looked around the room to see if anyone else had any idea what was going on, but couldn’t really get a read on their faces, so you looked back at Miles as a content smile spread over your lips.

“Because it’s pretty, is what I’m trying to say,” he sang, grinning, “And you are also pretty. But I like you anyway.”

Miles held out the flower he was holding and took a breath, “So please accept this flower, with its petals and a stem which represent my feelings and tells you…”

“Oh man, I’m in trouble,” he spoke, casting a glance over to a fan in the crowd.

“When words fail, what will I do? When words fail, how will she know how I feel? When words fail, will I fail too?” he sang again as he handed the flower off to a guardian.

You could feel your heart beat faster in your chest and it nearly hammered against your ribcage as if it were trying to escape. There was a heat spreading up from your neck to your cheeks and you weren’t entirely sure if it was from the light, the sudden attention, or just from your feelings for Miles.

“Hello fair princess. Oh look, the moon is out tonight,” he came to a stop a little more than halfway to the stage, “You remind me of that moon, because it's big and bright. And by big I don't mean chubby. Obviously you're not fat. But your personality is biggish… Is what I meant by that.”

A genuinely fond laugh fell from your lips and you placed a hand on your chest as you watched Miles began to walk closer again.

Miles locked eyes with you and gave you a smirk, “Sorry 'bout that fat thing, I'm on the hefty side myself. I have to blame the gene pool; which reminds me of… Oh where I am going with this?”

The music rang in your ears and your eyes never left Miles’ face as he came closer still. He walked along the front of the stage and made his way towards the stairs. As he continued to sing, you felt someone tugging on you and tried to swat their hands away until you finally looked to see Lindsay was trying to make you stand up.

You stood and allowed her to lead you around the front of the table.

“When words fail, what will I do? When words fail, how will she know how I feel? When words fail, will I fail too?” Miles came up onto the stage and walked closer to you, “Do I have a snowball's chance? Are my prospects just too grim? I spent my life stuck in the mud. Now, I'm crawling out on a limb.”

Miles finally came to a stop in front of you and you could almost feel the breath in your body being taken away. You were so confused and overwhelmed with everything going on that you had almost completely forgotten that this was all happening in the middle of the Achievement Hunter panel on the last day of RTX.

You felt Miles’ hand reach out and grab onto your own as he gave you a comforting sort of smile. Your eyes widened as you watched him slowly ease himself down onto one knee in front of you; the reaction from the crowd around you almost drowned out the music.

“If words fail, she'll know what I mean. If words fail, she'll just take my hand. She sees me like no one else has .If words fail, she'll understand… She'll understand,” Miles sang out and finished.

You were positive that you were shaking as tears pricked your eyes and your hand gripped tighter to Miles’. You watched as he reached into his pocket and pulled out a ring. He held it up to you and gave you the same goofy, overconfident smile he always gave you when he was doing something crazy.

“Y/N… I just sang a song from Shrek the Musical in front of thousands of people just to see you smile. And to ask you, if you would marry me?” he grinned, holding the ring just at your left ring finger.

It felt as though your entire world had stopped and all that mattered was Miles, and this moment. You did not trust your voice and all you could do was nod your head vigorously; Miles didn’t waste a second in sliding that ring up your finger. He got up off of the floor and reached for your face to hold in between both of his hands, the microphone laid forgotten on the ground.

“I love you,” he whispered, pressing a heated kiss to your lips.

#miles luna imagine #miles luna x reader #Miles L x Reader #rt imagine #rt reader insert #commission

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newstfionline · 4 years

Text

Saturday, October 31, 2020

Wonders from weeds (Times of London) Colleagues quietly scoffed when Alessandra Devoto, a plant biologist, started dedicating her time to researching the medicinal properties of a roadside weed. After years of study, however, she appears to have proved them wrong. Scientists have found that Arabidopsis thaliana, also known as mouse-ear cress or thale cress, stops the growth of breast cancer without damaging the healthy cells. It could help the development of chemotherapy treatments without side-effects. “The plant is very much like the Cinderella of the medicinal plant world—no one thought it was so special, but it has shown its true colors,” Professor Devoto, from Royal Holloway, University of London, said.

Walmart Pulls Guns, Ammo Displays in U.S. Stores, Citing Civil Unrest (WSJ) Walmart Inc. has removed all guns and ammunition from the sales floors of its U.S. stores this week, aiming to head off any potential theft of firearms if stores are broken into amid social unrest. The retail giant, which sells firearms in about half of its 4,700 U.S. stores, said customers can still purchase guns and ammunition upon request even though they are no longer on display. “We have seen some isolated civil unrest and as we have done on several occasions over the last few years, we have moved our firearms and ammunition off the sales floor as a precaution for the safety of our associates and customers,” a Walmart spokesman said. The company hasn’t decided how long the items will stay out of view, he said. Walmart also removed firearms and ammunition from stores this summer in the wake of George Floyd’s killing by police when several of Walmart’s stores were damaged.

Foreign journalists covering the US election (CJR) With the election approaching, America is a prime global news story, and foreign correspondents are playing a crucial role translating the febrile atmosphere for readers and viewers back home. (Donald Trump has fans abroad, of course, but most international observers seem to want him gone: only around fifteen percent of respondents to a recent poll covering seven European countries hope that he’s reelected.) This week, the New Yorker released a documentary about how foreign correspondents view the United States. Larry Madowo, a Kenyan journalist who works for the BBC, said that he’s been stunned to see that “the same things that America has been lecturing Africa on appear to be happening right here at home.” Alan Cassidy, who reports for the Swiss newspaper Tages-Anzeiger, described America in 2020 as “a car-crash situation: you don’t really want to watch, but you have to because it’s so outlandish and crazy and insane.” Jesper Steinmetz, of Denmark’s TV2, said that “it’s great working in this country, because it is fun to keep being baffled by what happens.” Arjen van der Horst, of the Dutch broadcaster NOS, argued that, contrary to many Americans’ view of themselves, “in so many ways, you’re the opposite of exceptional.” Svanberg and some of the journalists interviewed by the New Yorker feel that not being from the US is an advantage in their reporting, and affords them a measure of protection: they are, after all, not part of the “fake” domestic news media that Trump has encouraged many Americans to hate. But rubber bullets don’t discriminate—and American immigration officials do. Last month, the Department of Homeland Security outlined proposals for reforming the visa that foreign correspondents typically use to work in the US. As of now, the visa is valid for five years, but officials want to cut that period to two-hundred-and-forty days. The change would, ostensibly, “reduce fraud and ensure national security,” but it’s more likely a pretext to crack down on journalism. “The US was the paradigm for democracy. And now it’s not that way anymore,” Camila Zuluaga, a journalist with Caracol TV and Blu Radio in Colombia, said. “What do we see from the outside? It’s like it’s an empire that is going down.”

Report: US knew of problems family separation would cause (AP) Months before the Trump administration separated thousands of families at the U.S.-Mexico border, a “pilot program” in Texas left child-welfare officials scrambling to find empty beds for babies taken from their parents in a preview of bigger problems to come, according to a report released Thursday by congressional Democrats. Documents in the report suggest Health and Human Services officials weren’t told by the Department of Homeland Security why shelters were receiving more children taken from their parents in late 2017. It has since been revealed that DHS was operating a pilot program in El Paso, Texas, that prosecuted parents for crossing the border illegally and took their children away to HHS shelters. The problems revealed by the pilot program presaged what would happen months later: government employees caring for babies and young children in so-called tender age shelters and many parents being deported without their kids. The consequences linger today: Lawyers working to reunite immigrant families have said they can’t reach the deported parents of 545 children who were separated as early as July 2017.

Coronavirus dims Mexico’s bright Day of the Dead celebration (AP) Mexico’s Day of the Dead celebration this weekend won’t be the same in a year so marked by death, in a country where more than 90,000 people have died of COVID-19. Many of those had to be cremated rather than buried, and even for those with gravesides to visit, the pandemic has forced authorities in most parts of Mexico to close cemeteries to prevent the traditional Nov. 1-2 observances when entire families clean and decorate tombs, cover them with orange marigolds, light candles and chat with their deceased relatives, perhaps over a glass of their favorite beverage. “This year, the Day of the Dead must be celebrated virtually,” said Mexico City cultural secretary José Alfonso Suárez del Real, inviting city residents to post photos or videos of their altars on a city website. “It is fundamental that we recover and adopt once again the altars to our dead, which are household altars.”

As Coronavirus Surges, Dutch Wonder, ‘What Happened to Us?’ (NYT) As coronavirus cases have shot through the roof, waiting times for tests and results have grown so lengthy that the health authorities have considered sending samples to labs in Abu Dhabi. Contact tracing, divided among 25 competing contractors, has never gotten off the ground. After months of discouraging the use of masks, saying they promote a false sense of security, the government just did an about face, calling for them to be worn in all public spaces. And topping it all off, the royal family, ignoring the government’s advice to travel as little as possible, flew off to their luxurious holiday home in Greece, adding to growing mistrust and resentment at home. Britain? Spain? No. It’s the Netherlands, one of Europe’s wealthiest countries, renowned for its efficient and organized government in most circumstances—but not, apparently, in the pandemic. As a second wave surfaces across Europe, the Netherlands stands out with the Czech Republic and Belgium as among the hardest hit. It currently ranks sixth among European Union countries when it comes to the rate of new infections, with 56 cases per 100,000 inhabitants—its highest total ever.

Parisians flee, sidewalks empty as France enters lockdown (AP) Parisians fleeing for the countryside jammed the roads ahead of France’s lockdown to slow the spread of resurgent coronavirus infections, and there was only a sprinkling of people hurrying along city sidewalks Friday as the nationwide restrictions went into effect. In France, concerns were growing that rising infections would swamp the country’s health system, so authorities ordered another four-week lockdown beginning Friday. Many areas of the French capital resembled a regular lazy weekend morning—on what would normally have been a bustling weekday. Those who were out frequently clutched permission forms proving they had an exemption that allowed them to to be on streets. The only places that were busy were grocery stores and markets as people stockpiled food and other necessities. All of France’s 67 million people have been ordered to stay at home at all times with no visitors, or risk steep fines or prosecution. There are a handful of exceptions, such as being allowed out for one hour of exercise a day within a half-mile (1 kilometer) of home, to go to medical appointments, to a place of work, or to shop for essential goods. Restaurants and cafés are shuttered, apart from those that offer takeout.

The war in the Caucasus nears a bloody tipping point (Washington Post) This past weekend, the United States brokered a cease-fire between warring neighbors Armenia and Azerbaijan. According to some accounts, the uneasy truce barely lasted an hour. Instead, the conflict in the Caucasus rages on, marking the worst period of hostilities in the region in almost three decades. Civilian casualties are mounting, with both sides accusing the other of ferrying in foreign fighters and indiscriminately targeting urban areas with missile strikes and artillery fire. On Wednesday, Azerbaijani authorities said at least 21 civilians were killed and dozens more injured after rockets fired by Armenian forces using a Russian-made Smerch missile system hit the Azerbaijani town of Barda, which is some 20 miles away from the front lines of the conflict. Amnesty International confirmed that those rockets had unleashed cluster munitions, which are designed to inflict indiscriminate damage and banned under international convention. “The firing of cluster munitions into civilian areas is cruel and reckless, and causes untold death, injury and misery,” said Marie Struthers, Amnesty International’s director for Eastern Europe and Central Asia, in a statement. “As this conflict continues to escalate, Armenian, Armenian-backed and Azerbaijani forces have all been guilty of using of banned weapons that have endangered the lives of civilians caught in the middle.” “The conflict may soon reach an irreversible point where it will not stop without a dramatic expansion of fighting and increased loss of life,” wrote Carey Cavanaugh, a professor at the University of Kentucky who helped lead internationally mediated negotiations between the sides in 2001.

Powerful Aegean earthquake kills at 19 people in Turkey and Greece, injures hundreds (Washington Post) A powerful earthquake in the Aegean Sea left at least 19 people dead Friday in Turkey and Greece, flattened at least 20 buildings in coastal Turkey and sent a surge of seawater flooding streets near the Turkish city of Izmir. The magnitude 7 earthquake—felt as far away as Istanbul and Athens—occurred about 10 miles north of the Greek island of Samos, according to U.S. Geological Survey. At least 17 people were dead and more than 700 injured in Turkey, according to Turkey’s disaster management agency, which said one of the victims had drowned. At least 20 structures, including some multistory apartment buildings in Izmir, collapsed and rescue crews and volunteers combed through the rubble into the night. It was the second major earthquake to hit Turkey this year. In January, at least 41 people were killed in an earthquake that struck Elazig in central Turkey.

Hungry bears with a taste for grapes and chestnuts are causing havoc in Japan (Washington Post) Hungry bears with a taste for grapes and chestnuts are causing havoc across Japan, and thousands of the animals are ending up dead as a result. Two people have been killed and almost 100 have been injured this year as human-bear encounters soar, according to Environment Ministry data and media reports. Four prefectures have put residents on high alert, with some children carrying bells on their way to school. Farmers are counting the cost this week after bears raided their vineyards and munched through thousands of dollars’ worth of premium grapes. Crop losses in many areas are rising. But the news is even more grisly for the bears. More than 9,000 Asiatic black bears have been caught and killed since the start of 2019, according to the Environment Ministry, by far the highest rate since data began in 1950. Bears have been spotted in school grounds and even wandering around a shopping mall in central Japan’s Ishikawa prefecture in recent weeks. Another injured four people, at one point ramming into a police car and puncturing a tire with its claws. A shortage of acorns is propelling the bears down from their mountain homes in search of food ahead of their winter hibernation. As Japan’s rural population shrinks, people have pulled out of the foothills that formed buffer zones between the bears’ mountain homes and the flatlands where people live. “Those farmlands have been abandoned, and they have grown into forests,” said Shinichi Koike, associate professor at Tokyo University of Agriculture and Technology. “They in turn become part of the habitat for bears, boars and monkeys. Gradually, the habitat for wild animals is expanding toward flatter areas across Japan, and approaching the flat areas just behind populated areas.”

Protesting Thai students boycott royal graduation day (Reuters) Some students sympathetic to Thai protesters said on Friday they were boycotting graduation ceremonies led by King Maha Vajiralongkorn in a show of anger at the monarchy amid growing calls to reform it. The ceremonies, at which the monarch personally hands out degrees, are a rite of passage for graduates and their families with photographs of the moment displayed with pride in many Thai homes. But protests since mid-July have brought open criticism of the monarchy and calls to curb its power, defying a longstanding taboo and lese majeste laws that set a jail term of up to 15 years for criticism of the king or his family.

Angered at French call to ‘reform’ Islam, tens of thousands gather in protests across Muslim-majority countries (Washington Post) Anti-French protests erupted across Muslim-majority countries on Friday, with tens of thousands expressing anger over the French government’s call for “reform” of Islam, a day after three were killed in a church in what President Emmanuel Macron referred to as “an Islamist terrorist attack.” In Bangladesh’s capital Dhaka, police said 20,000 protesters took to the streets after Friday prayers, rallying under the banner of two Islamist groups. The demonstrators carried signs reading: “Stop Religious Defamation,” “Freedom of Speech is not Freedom to Abuse,” and “Boycott French Products.” Thousands of Muslims marching in Pakistan stomped over French flags while calling for boycotts of French products after prayers, the Associated Press reported. Police officers blocked roads near the French Embassy in Islamabad, the capital, in anticipation of protests there, according to the AP. The demonstrations were the latest sign of rising anger across the Muslim world, directed at Macron’s government’s rhetoric defending cartoons published by Charlie Hebdo, a satirical newspaper, which denigrated the prophet Muhammad. France has been stunned by a series of deadly knife attacks carried out by Muslim assailants in several cities. But the response to the violence by the French authorities, which included a crackdown on Islamist groups, has energized parts of the Arab and Muslim world like few issues in recent memory.

#headlines #news

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animedelivered · 7 years

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Anime Central 2017 Review

This year Anime Central celebrated their 20th anniversary, being the strongest, biggest midwest convention there is. Fans from just about everywhere come to this milestone anime convention, to share their passion for anime, cosplaying, hobbies, arts, games, interests, and just about everything a convention can have.

Location

Since 1997 the Hyatt Regency Hotel and Rosemont Convention Center, has been Anime Central home, giving it 18 year at this location. Acen (for short) is still expanding and making the most of the space from both venues. With tons of hotels surrounding the Rosemont Convention Center, you don’t have to worry about Acen being booked, but if you are looking to room at the Hyatt Regency Hotel, you will need to book the day they are released. That’s right, this convention is so popular, the main venue hotel sells out within minutes! You want to be sure to stay connected to #AnimeCentral social medias to recieve up to date posts.

If you are not rooming in the hotel and you’re just a local, the option of taking public transit train is a block away. If you are looking to drive there, parking was available just about everywhere, from hotel garages to train station parking. Driving to AnimeCentral, your best bet would be to park at the Blue line train station, not only is it cheap but, you are able to leave and come back when you want. Unlike the garage parking provided for the hotels, once you’re out, its risking finding the same parking spot or being full.

Wasn’t thinking about packing food for the weekend? It’s ok! the Hyatt Rosemont has 2 restaurant, 1 being the bar/grill and the other being a buffet restaurant. Need something really fast and don’t want to wait for your food? They have that too! The Hyatt offered a discount for Acen attendees on Lunch and Dinner tables, where you can grab what you like and pay at the register. Didn’t like what they offered? Just outside the Hyatt, food trucks were also available, with staple foods like: hot dogs, burgers, tacos, salads, ice cream, pizza, etc. If non of this fancies you, taking a drive out or if you prefer walking within 2 miles, Chain restaurants were also available. If you need food now and don’t want to leave your hotel room, the Hyatt provides menus for places in the area that deliver to the hotel, and bring it to your room! You can never go hungry at Anime Central.

Registration

This year registration ran smoothly with some enhancements into place. People lined up hours in advance to pick up their badges, or to purchase at the door. They had everyone sectioned off in groups, pick up badges, buying a badge with a debit/credit card, buying a badge with cash, will call, and people that had their badges mailed to them. Giving everyone many ways to getting in and out of registration with out guessing what-is-what and “where am i suppose to go?”

We purchased our badges in advance and waited at the will call line. Once at the booth you were greeted with a staff member asking for an ID and a barcode, which was given to us via email at purchase. They scanned your bar code and Handed you a beautiful badge with your name sticker on it. Landyards, guidbooks, and bags were being handed out in front of registration, but theses weren’t just any grab bags, these were limited edition convention backpacks! Sentai Filmworks was also handing out these colorful bags to the first 10 thousand people who attended Acen.

This was the first time a convention of this size handled registration so well in our experience! We hope other conventions take note on what Anime Central has going on. 😉

Dealer Room

A convention is not complete without a dealer room, which Anime Central perfects so well each year. Bringing the veteran and new set of booths to the con for attendees to surround. Upon entering the dealer room, we are in Awe with big named companies. Big booths such as, Crunchyroll, Aniplex, Funimation, Good Smile Company, Sentai Filmworks, Sekai Project, Kotobukiya, Viz Media, and tons more. Anime Central merch booth was located in 2 areas of the dealer room this year. The usual booth located by the entrance of the dealer room, and the newest addition was located towards the center of the dealer room. Showing off all of Acens merchandise in glass cases from old to new. Providing a media deck giving the best bird eye view of just about all of the dealer room. Under it were backdrop of their mascots photo-ready for everyone that likes to take selfies and group pictures to remember this amazing event!

This years dealer room was set up a little bit different, as we mentioned the bigger companies at the entrance, but the right side of the dealer room upon entering was the artist alley. Rows and rows of unique work done by the artist themselves, in one room! Given the location of the artist alley, it was set up to have its very own entrance as well, giving attendees easy access right into the artist alley. Towards the end of the artist alley, Visiting convention booths were available for attendees to purchase advance tickets to their convention. Up next, was a section for cosplayers! Anime Central provided photo scenes for cospalay gatherings as well for their attendees. We hoping Acen provides more photo scenes to the venue all around for other photo gatherings, this something we have not seen at any other convention and love the idea.

Right next to the cosplay photo scene, was a company that was a first for this years convention, called Bang-Zoom! With a medium size stage, as well as seats and tables for people to enjoy the show. This wasn’t just any show, Bang-Zoom! is actually a big deal for people that are interested in voice acting. They offered auditions for an anime called March Comes in like a Lion. Yes you heard correctly, Bang-Zoom! is giving the chosen winner tickets to fly to California to their recording studios to help dub the anime. Hoping this isn’t just a one time opportunity, we would love to see more of Bang Zoom! coming to Anime Central, giving inspiration to anyone attending the con and those around the area the chance to fulfill their dreams of being a voice actor.

To the right of their stage, you are faced with tons of Exhibitors with just about everything you can think of to purchase. If you are a figure collector, like ourselves, the exhibit hall is just for you. Sellers with old and rare to find items, as well as new and must have things. Aside of figures, sellers catered to just about everyone, from furry accessories,K-pop merch, Swords, Anime posters, kawaii plushies to hentai.

Held at the Rosemont Convention center, the venue provided lots of food, beverages, alcoholic drinks, and desserts. If fast food wasn’t your thing, within the convention hall, their restaurant was open for you to sit down and enjoy.

We truly love and enjoyed the convention hall, the dealers, the artist alley, and the photo scenes provided, and full heartily recommend checking out the dealer room on your next visit.

Panels

A Convention isn’t a convention without Panels! Every year Anime Central is loaded with panels, with just about any subject you can think of, even non anime related discussions. Panels such as: Godzilla vs Anime, Her legs are how long?, How to make you’re very own video game, Anime improve comedy, Waifu Wars 3D, Whose Line is it Anime, Sports Bras Over Athletic Cups, and tons of others including 18 plus panels, for the adults that enjoy the entertainment.

With over 200 plus panels going on through out the weekend at Anime Central, it can be hard to decide what to do. For new attendees we recommend checking out main panels like the Masquerade, where talented cosplayer walk on stage and show off their work and craftsmanship to bring the character to life.

We noticed something might have changed this year regarding the panels held at night, there weren’t any panels scheduled to start after 1am. Previous years at Acen had held panels going on almost all night until the next morning. Leaving you the option of checking out the video programming, video game or board game room if you were looking for late night activities.

Our favorite main event at ACEN has always been the Masquerade and this year’s was special in its hosting format. In a tribute to the legacy of ACEN on its 20th anniversary, the event rotated between several sets of MC’s during different stages of the show. This was a wonderful way to convey the love and dedication that the staff has had for this convention and it’s attendees for the past two decades. It was wonderful to see familiar faces and meet some new(older?) ones to get a grasp on how ACEN came to be and has continued to grow through the years as the reins were passed down to newer generations.

Once the show got started proper, the walk-on section started and we were able to see the best-of-the-best cosplay on stage! Right out of the gate there were several larger cosplays from Escaflowne, Gundam and Pokemon to get everyone excited. They were quickly followed by droves of smaller but no less impressive costumes with a few notable standouts from Overwatch, Suisei No Gargantia and Metal Gear Revengeance (personal favorite!).

Next up was the performance section which is comprised of many skits for attendees to show off their creativity. As with every year, there were some cleverly designed plays dealing with the hottest crazes in the anime and gaming scenes and a couple of misses. That said, it was easy to tell everyone on stage put forth their all into every song, dance or play making the entire experience enjoyable as a whole. A good time indeed!

There was also a performance piece and memorial video done specially to honor a member of the ACEN staff that had passed earlier in the year to honor her love and commitment to the cosplay scene and conventions.

All in all it was a fantastic reminder of all the things we love about ACEN and the people that make it happen. We’ll be patiently waiting to see what pops up next year!

Video Game / Tabletop

Leading into the Video Game Room, Acen has surprised us this year with a massive game room brought together by 3 companies for all the attendees at Anime Central!

Tokyo Attack providing all your favorite rhythm games like Dance Dance Revolution, Taiko Drum Master arcade, Dance Evolution, Pop n Music, Sound Voltex, Jubeat, Pump it Up, Beatmania. As well as other arcade games such as, Fighting Climax Ignition, Silent Scope Bone Eater, Initial D Arcade, and Super Table Flip.

World 9 Gaming provided consoles dating back to Atari to current generation consoles, PC LAN gaming, and a vast library of games.

Lastly Pachinko Fever, who brought about a dozen of Japanese pachinko machines for the attendees to try.

Sounds like a lot? It was! Which is why the game room was moved to the Rosemont Convention Center. Taking the walkway from the Hyatt hotel, it was just towards the very end on the left entry where you would find the game room, there is no way you can miss it, music and lights were booming as if there was a dance party going on. Upon entering you see a hallway of arcade cabinets and a few pinball machines. Moving forward you enter the mother load of all games, with retro consoles, the PlayStation VR, tons of DDR games, Rock Band with a dedicated stage, 3 projectors showing the tournaments going on, almost at each corner.

This years game room was by far the best we have seen out of all convention we’ve been to the past years. We highly recommend checking out the game room when attending Anime Central!

Guest

Anime Central brought phenomenal guests this year, which featured:

• DJ Amaya • Daniel Coglan • Jillian Coglan • Crispin Freeman • Toru Furuya • Gacharic Spin • DJ HeavyGrinder • Imeruat • Eric Maruscak • May’n • Helen McCarthy • Emily Neves • Final Fantasy – A New World • Tony Oliver • Putumayo • Micah Solusod • John Swasey • TeddyLoid • Alexis Tipton • Shinichi Watanabe • Lisle Wilkerson • Mamoru Yokota

A huge combination of international and local guests, to bring us the best of the best! Our highlight was seeing Crispin Freeman, which whom we haven’t meet in a very long time. He is a voice actor known for many roles such as popular series, Naruto, Hellsing, Ghost in the Shell, Big O, Slayers, Chobits, Last Exile, and Witch Hunter Robin. Not only is he well know in Anime industry, but in the Video game too! You can hear his work in Diablo 3 as the male wizard, Helios the Sun God in God of War, and in Transformers: War of Cybertron. He is a very knowledgeable and down to earth kinda guy, and is happy to give advice to just about everyone seeking a career in voice acting.

Another guest we had targeted this year was the craziest of crazy! A man who made an anime with himself as a character in the show called Excel Saga, non-other than Shinichi “Nabeshin” Watanabe. He directed Excel Saga, Nerima daikon Brothers, and Puni Puni Poemy. Just like the anime he produces, he aims to make the audience laugh and have fun, he is approachable and fun to be around, though his English isn’t great, he tries to communicate to his fans and does his best to make you smile. He also held a panel showing off some of his work and some we didn’t know he was a part of.

Our next guest we were super excited to check out was Teddy Loid, a music/DJ artist who performed his work at Hardcore Synergy, also known as the Friday Rave. Very timid kinda of guy in person, but as soon as he gets in the notion of his performance, he shines and shows his rhythm. Which brings us to our next topic to talk about it, the rave!

Rave

One of most popular event at Anime Central is the Rave, like the previous year, Acen sold separate Rave badges for those that were only interested in dancing, listening to music or just enjoy the light show. Every single year the line for the rave just gets bigger and bigger, people lining up hours in advance just to be up close to the stage where you can check out Acens guest as they put on the best music they have created. Bringing DJ’s from Japan like TeddyLoid! Best known for producing music for Panty & Stocking with Garterbelt, Mekakucity Actors, Popular video Me! Me! Me!, Mugen ***Knights, and Wrecking Crew Orchestra. Another guest of honor is Taku Takahashi, who is part of another group called M-Flo. The group escalated the popularity charts by selling 2 million copies of their soundtrack. Given already the fame, Taku is well known for remixing music for prominent artist across several genres!

We were lucky enough to experience Japan awesome DJ’s all in one roof! The rave is an main event to not miss!

Closing Remarks

We thank Anime Central for giving us the opportunity to enjoy the convention as members of the Press. The opportunity to talk in a more intimate setting with their guest of honor is always the best part.

We thoroughly enjoyed our time and experience at Acen, and every year we are given something to “wow” about. We can not wait to see what Acen will be bring us next year! 🙂

Please be sure to check out our Anime Central gallery for more photos on the event!

Anime Central 2017 Convention Experience:

**Update** A total of 30,221 attendees for 2017

Anime Central 2017 Review was originally published on AnimeDelivered.com

#acen #acen2017 #anime central #anime central 2017 #Anime Con #anime conventions #AnimeCentral #chicago #con #convention #convention center #donald e stephan convention center #double tree #hilton #hyatt rosemont #midwest #rosemont

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heckin-good-holland-blog · 7 years

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In Real Life

Request:

Warnings: None!!

Pairing: Reader x Peter Parker

Genre: Fluff ~

Word Count: 2.7k holy moly

A/N: I'm so sorry this took like a million years but I hope you like it :D I'm thinking of making a part 2 so let me know what you guys think!! Also I didn’t get around to proofreading so if you see mistakes PLEASE let me know xx

Ever since middle school you had been watching your friends find dates and get into relationships. They teased you about being a third wheel sometimes, but you didn't mind. You did feel lonely once in a while without someone there to hold you, but you didn't feel that way very often. Even though technically you weren't dating anyone in real life, there was a boy thousands of miles away that had your heart. He was constantly texting, snapchatting, and even video calling you to the point where he knew more about you than your friends in real life did. You had the biggest crush on him and wished more than anything that you could see him in person one day.

You met Peter online, seeing his nerdy blog recommended for you and deciding to follow him. For a few days you just kind of liked each other's posts occasionally and that was it. That was up until you saw his post about the Avengers. Being a big fan of them, you built up the courage to shoot him a message and you two immediately hit it off. Peter knew a lot about all of the superheroes you idolized, which gave you plenty to talk about. As it turned out, Peter actually worked for Tony Stark. You almost didn't believe him, but the things he knew and said would have been impossible to make up.

Over time you and Peter got to be a lot closer. Even though you had never actually talked to him in person you felt as if he was your best friend in the whole world. Your feelings for him grew even more than that though and you eventually wound up being in a relationship. Peter actually asked you out during one of your traditional all-night Skype calls.

"I've got something I have to ask you," he said as he slid into frame on his rolling chair. He had his wireless headphones on underneath his hoodie and was busy trying to get his mic in the right place. He had a lot of nerdy technology stuff and was always finding new electronics to play with.

"Sure what's up?" you asked. You turned up the volume a little bit, butterflies filling your stomach. That happened a lot when Peter talked to you. Even though you loved seeing him and hearing his voice, you still preferred texting since he couldn't see the way that the things he did affected you. Luckily the lighting in your room was bad so he couldn't tell if you were blushing.

"Ok so," he said, letting out a long breath. "We've been talking for a while and uh... It's sorta weird isn't it? That we've never met? I mean I don't think that it is... Unless you do."

"I don't think it's weird at all," you replied. He nodded, his mouth curling up at the sides. He had a habit of hiding his smiles like that but you didn't really know why since his smile always made your day.

"How do you feel about trying a long distance relationships?" he asked suddenly, hiding his face from the camera by leaning over slightly. You were a little taken aback. Sure, you had been crushing on him but a confession like that was the last thing you were expecting.

"I-I think it's worth a shot," you said. "I mean, we talk more than a lot of the couples that I know... Besides, maybe we can finally meet soon."

"Wait, seriously?" he exclaimed, getting super close to the camera. You laughed and nodded.

"Let's do it!" you said. He grinned, unable to disguise the pure joy on his face. And that was that. You and Peter cared for each other so much that the distance didn't even matter. You started to forget that it was even strange to date someone online. Every time your phone went off your heart sped up since there was a high chance it was going to be Peter. Some nights you even cancelled your plans with friends just to call him.

Two years passed, and you were still going strong. One day after school you logged onto your computer to see if Peter was online when you noticed that you had a new email. You almost screamed when you read that it was from Stark Enterprises. Apparently there was a youth convention thing being held in New York and you had been selected to go. You reread the email at least 50 times before your parents got home and you practically recited the entire thing from memory as you begged them to let you go. It had always been a dream of yours to work for Tony Stark since you were really interested in science and, let's face it, you thought Iron Man was awesome. You were super jealous of Peter and his internship. Realization hit you like a truck as you were in the middle of guilt tripping your parents into letting you go.

"Oh my god!" you exclaimed. "If it's in New York then that means... I could finally meet Peter!" Your mom and dad knew about your online relationship and although they were skeptical at first they ended up really liking Peter. You had let them talk to him a bit one day when he was on Skype and he made such a great impression that they absolutely loved him.

"I don't think there's any harm in letting you go," your mom finally said, giving in. "You did say that the airfare is payed for, right?"

"Yes!" you said quickly. "I just need food money and that's it."

"Alright, fine," your dad agreed and just like that you were going to New York. After some careful consideration you decided not to tell Peter right away. There was a part of you that was afraid of meeting him because you were scared that he wouldn't like you as much in real life. It was ridiculous since you'd been talking for so long, but you couldn't help but feel nervous. As the days went by and the trip got closer you felt more and more anxious.

When it was finally time to leave, you headed off to the airport by yourself. Your knees trembled as you entered the terminal and you spent the whole flight thinking about Peter. You tried to snap out of it since the real reason you were there was for the youth convention, but he was really the only thing on your mind. The two of you had talked many times about how great it would be when you met and you were just so terrified of letting him down.

After landing you hung around the airport for a while trying to figure out your next move. You decided to text Peter and try to catch up with him since you didn't have to go to Stark Tower until the next morning.

Heyo, what are you doing right now

He read it right away, the three dots that showed he was typing popping up.

Parker 💘: I'm doing some homework at that sandwich shop I talk about all the time. Sorry I can't call tonight, I gotta study

You grinned despite yourself. Peter talked about Mr. Delmar's shop constantly and had described it to you a million times. You flagged down a taxi and told them to take you there right away. Sure enough, when you arrived it looked exactly the way you had pictured it. You checked how you looked in your phone camera, fixing your hair a little before going inside. It smelled absolutely delicious, and you quickly scanned the small restaurant for Peter. Your heart fell when you didn't see anyone you recognized.

"Um hi," you said to the man working, thinking that as long as you were there you might as well get something to eat. "Can I have the number 5? With extra pickles?"

"Absolutely," he said with a friendly smile. He must have been Mr. Delmar.

"I have a question," you said timidly. "You wouldn't happen to have seen Peter Parker around recently, have you?" He looked at you for a moment before shaking his head.

"No, I haven't seen Peter in a few days," he replied. "Why? Do you know him?"

"Yeah I do," you said, blushing. "We... We're really close uh... friends."

"Ah, you his date?" he asked with a wink. "Pete's a good kid but if you ask me you're a little out of his league. He's a bit of a brat." You laughed as he handed you your sandwich.

"Good luck tracking him down," he said and waved as you left. You stood out on the street eating your food for a while, wondering why Peter had lied to you about where he was. Curious, you texted him again. It was just a short 'wyd?' but you felt weird about it. Maybe you seemed a little clingy but all you wanted was to see him. It took him a few minutes to respond, but when he did you were ready to read it right away.

Parker 💘: I'm at the library doing some work. Now's not a good time, sorry

You frowned, disappointment washing over you. He must have been really busy. You shoved your phone in your pocket and headed to your hotel, giving up on Peter for the time being.

The next morning you woke up early since you couldn't sleep. The excitement for the convention had kept you awake for a long time and you were really looking forward to the day. You got ready quickly and hopped into another cab to Stark Tower. When you arrived, there were loads of other kids your age funneling into a large lecture hall. You followed the crowd, finding a seat towards the back. After everyone had arrived and settled in a hush fell over the crowd. You looked up to see Tony Stark himself standing in the front. Forgetting everything about your troubles with Peter, you listened intently for the duration of the presentation.

Towards the end Tony had left and another guy was talking for a while. You saw your phone light up from inside your bag and against your better judgment you checked it to find a message from Peter.

Parker 💘: Hey! Tony's busy rn and I'm just waiting in the tower, do you want to call me?

You sucked in a breath, your heart pounding. Peter was here. You typed a response as best as you could with your shaking hands.

Where are you waiting?

Parker 💘: Um in a room in the west corridor. Why?

You didn't bother answering before stuffing your phone in your bag and rushing towards the door. A man was blocking the door since he must have been a security guard.

"I... I think I'm gonna puke," you lied. He wrinkled his nose but let you pass, and you practically ran through the door. It dawned on you that you had absolutely no idea where the west corridor was, so you just started wandering around. You walked all over the first floor but found nothing, so you climbed up a flight of stairs. You were almost to the top when you stopped dead. Tony Stark was standing before you and he looked very intimidating.

"Excuse me, kiddo. I don't think this is where you're supposed to be," he said. You were so shocked that you could only stare with your mouth open. You couldn't believe you were being scolded by your biggest inspiration.

"I-I'm sorry," you stammered. "I was just l-looking for somebody-"

"There's someone else walking aimlessly around here?" he asked. "We can't have that, there's a lot of top secret stuff up here. We should go find them, do you know where they went?"

"No!" you said, panicking. "He... He works for you. He's my friend, I just wanted to see him." Tony considered this for a moment. He looked you up and down, his expression unreadable.

"Your friend..." he said as he turned away from you. "You said he works for me?"

"Yes! Yes, he told me he's part of an internship program here. He said he was waiting to talk to you about something and I thought that since I was here I'd try to go and see him. Of course I didn't really think that through because, as you said, there's a lot of top secret stuff and I shouldn't be-"

"Alright kid that's enough," Tony cut you off. You didn't realize you had been babbling so much and felt your face flush. He faced you again and you were surprised to see he was smiling.

"I think I know who you're talking about," he said. "Thanks for reminding me that I need to talk to him. Here, I'll lead you there if you swear not to walk around here by yourself again."

"I promise!" you exclaimed. He chuckled and started walking with you jogging behind him to keep up. It turned out you were going in the right direction and eventually you stopped in front of what appeared to be a break room of sorts. You stood shyly behind Tony, your nerves getting to you.

"Hey!" he said loudly to someone inside the room. "We need to talk. Before that though I ran into someone who I think you know." He moved over slightly so that you could see. There, sitting on the couch with his feet on the table was Peter. He was even more handsome than you thought he'd be. He wore his t-shirt with a joke about telekinesis that you loved so much along with a big flannel. He stood up when he saw you, knocking over the pile of books that sat on the table.

"Y/N?" he asked, his eyes wide. He was taller than you thought, with wider shoulders as well. One strand of his hair was loose and sat limply on his forehead. You felt your eyes begin to water and you nodded slowly. You looked away, feeling like you could burst into tears at any moment. A few seconds later you were being enveloped by his arms. You pressed your head against him and hugged him back, squeezing him gently. You had waited so long to feel his touch and you were scared that if you let go you'd never get it back. He pulled back a little, his arms moving around your waist.

"What are you doing here?" he asked. You looked up at him, trying to memorize the exact colors in his eyes and the freckles on his face.

"I... I was chosen for the youth convention and since it was in New York I came to see you," you told him. He was smiling from ear to ear and seeing him so happy made you even more emotional.

"You're so much more beautiful in person," he whispered as he pulled you in for another hug. You laughed, sniffing a little.

"Peter, I've been waiting for so long to meet you and I just..." You trailed off when he kissed your forehead, your breath hitching. He moved closer towards your lips and it was like everything was moving in slow motion.

You jumped suddenly when Tony cleared his throat from behind you, stumbling back a little.

"Oh crap, uh... sorry Mr. Stark," Peter said awkwardly. You were both suddenly very aware of his presence in the room and you quickly backed away from Peter feeling very embarrassed.

"Yeah, I'm only a little weirded out," he said. "Listen, I'm gonna go since I have a lot of stuff to do. Find me later or just call Happy, ok?"

"Y-yeah alright," Peter replied. "But what if Happy doesn't pick up?"

"I think you'll be a little preoccupied anyway," Tony said with a nod in your direction, causing your face to turn bright red. He smiled and walked away, leaving the two of you alone.

"I've looked up to him for so long and I admire him a lot, but I don't think I could have waited another second for him to leave," you said with a giggle.

"Well, we've waited this long, haven't we?"

#AH i had big plans for this one and it kinda flopped #pt 2 might be coming soon #spider-man #spider man: homecoming #spiderman fluff #tom holland #tom holland imagine #peter parker #peter parker x reader #peter parker imagine #sam writes!!

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cubaazblog-blog · 7 years

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Everything You Need To Know About Cuba Vacations

Cuba is a unique country and therefore a holiday destination like no other. The political position for the last fifty years has made the island among the few areas in the world without mass marketing and mass media. It's a place which could confuse and delight in equal measure and well worth a trip before things change. Cuba holidays are easy to plan using the net since there is now tons of information about facilities on the island.

There are two approaches to visit Cuba; either by remaining at one of numerous all-inclusive resorts or as an independent traveler. The resorts are usually clustered along the north coast of this island to the east of Havana. There is some top class accommodation available and some great deals.

The shores are so phenomenal and the water is crystal clear so that they are great for a beach style holiday. Despite the fact that Cuba is a communist country you won't need for anything. However the hotels do not offer you much opportunity to really get acquainted with the island and its unique lifestyle.

Travelling independently to Cuba is fairly easy and extremely intriguing. There are some lovely hotels with great amenities or you can really get to satisfy the locals by remaining in a family house known as a casa particular.

What started out as a covert practice of residents renting rooms to people is becoming governed by the state so it is perfectly safe to use those houses. They change is style and comfort from basic to really beautiful as most Cuban houses are full of antique furniture. Food is available at country run restaurants or you can often make arrangements with the individuals you're staying with. There are also licensed private restaurants called paladares where you can get foods of a high quality.

The island of Cuba is amazingly varied and the holiday possibilities are many. You will find great cities, small cities each with another personality, national parks, magnificent Caribbean beaches and world class dive websites. There are a few exceptional ecosystems and wildlife species like the smallest bird in the world, the Bee Hummingbird.

The funds Havana is unlike any other capital in the entire world. Prepare to be astounded by the structure, culture and the individuals. There is a lot to see in the city and some of the highlights include the Cigar Factory, the Museum of the Revolution, the Malecon and the older part of the city, Havana Vieja. Cuban music is valued all over the world and you will hear it everywhere. A night out in the funding necessarily comprises rum, dancing, live music along with some new Cuban friends.

Santiago is the second city situated at the opposite end of the island in the capital and quite different from Havana. The culture is more African and this is the house of the Cuban carnival. It's packed outside for carnival week so in the event that you want to go be sure you have bookings in a lot of time.

Transport can be annoyingly slow in Cuba, however it's the slow pace of life which many visitors fall in love with. Drivers can hire cars to get around more easily. There are a number of businesses in Havana and Santiago that provide cars of a very good standard. You could even hire one of those old American classics.

Cuba Vacations are full of beaches, sun, friendly people and fascinating experience you won't get anywhere else. Check out the details on the internet to learn what you want to do in Cuba.

THE BEACHES

travel to b cuba b

Certainly the most important reason tourists adore Cuba are for the beaches that rank among the very best on earth. White powdery sand and warm turquoise waters bring guests from all over year after year. In case you're looking for an All Inclusive vacation set on a world-class shore, then consider Varadero, Cayo Coco, Cayo Santa Maria, Cayo Guillermo, and Holguin. These destinations on the north side of this island are best for letting the warm Caribbean sun melt away your stress as you relax with a Mojito or two.

THE NATURE LOVER

Cuba offers a Selection of Destinations for Eco-tourists and nature fans alike. Though mostly known for its beaches and top hotels, keep in mind it is a tropical island with much of the interior covered in rainforest and jungle. As a ideal setting for hiking, bird watching, horseback riding and also for the more adventuresome - zip lining and rock climbing, there's plenty of scenery and fauna and flora to remain absorbed in your senses. The best location in Cuba to get back to nature and find is a remain in Santiago de Cuba in the South East of the island. Lots of excursions are offered in the region to the mountainous and jungle regions aimed towards Eco-tourism and adventure travel.

HISTORY AND CULTURE

From the times of the pirates through to the revolution led by Fidel Castro and Che Guevara and the ongoing differences with the United States, Cuba has a rich history that nonetheless provides people with a fascinating portrayal of this nation to this day. Seeing Santiago de Cuba in the south, one can find out about the invasion about the Moncada Barracks which began the revolution and take a trip to the Sierra Madres to research Fidel along with the Rebel's old hideout.

The City of Trinidad takes you straight back to the colonial days with remarkable design and that authentic Cuban sense. Time spent at the capital of Havana is a cross-section of this culture and history of Cuba with forts constructed to repel the pirates museums showcasing the revolution and where the sounds of Cuba come alive in neighborhood pubs and restaurants. Anywhere you go in Cuba has different references to the extraordinary history and culture of this island either through architecture, museums or just music and dance. The best locations to discover the culture and history of Cuba are Trinidad, Havana, Cienfuegos and Santiago de Cuba.

SPORTS

If you are a bit more active, Cuba offers an array of sports and activities. With its natural coral and clear waters, Cuba is an exceptional place for snorkeling and Scuba for both beginners and advanced divers. Many hotels offer you the conventional watersports (kayaking, parasailing, waterskiing, and jet ski) as well as trips to outer areas for diving. Though maybe not the first destination that comes to mind for golfing, there are two classes and much more slated to open shortly. As previously mentioned; trekking, ziplining and rock climbing can be found across the island.

HONEYMOONS AND ROMANCE

Best hotel chains such as Sandals and Sol Melia offer adults only resorts that cater to couples with extensive spa facilities, stylish restaurants, relaxed amusement and luxury rooms at Varadero. For a more tranquil experience, a stay at one of the Cayos of Cuba such as Cayo Coco, Cayo Santa Maria or Cayo Guillermo offer silent, serene regions to spend holidays and nights in your shore, or enjoy late night ocean-side candlelit dinners under the stars.

FAMILIES

The hotels and resorts in Cuba have made great strides in getting more family friendly. Many chains such as Iberostar and Barcelo possess "Kids Stay and Eat Free" programs and give an extensive variety of activities geared specifically to children with day supervised clubs. Off the resort, there are excursions which are always popular such as swimming with dolphins and discovering other unique wildlife from the many organic parks and reserves throughout the island. The very best place to take the children in Cuba is Varadero as it's the destination which has the most built up tourist infrastructure.

Cuba is a fascinating destination that has something for everybody. You can do as little or as much as you'd like and feel relaxed and rewarded. Couples, families, beach lovers and culture lovers play in this natural playground by the tens of thousands. Discover for yourself why they don't take just any vacation, they require a Cuba holiday!

As the biggest island in the Caribbean, Cuba is much more than a destination for lazing away on the perfect beaches. Such a land mass boasts terrain, wildlife, culture and an ecosystem that's unmatched by any other Caribbean destination. While Nearly All visits to Cuba have long endless days on miles of white sandy shores, there is opportunity To get more out of Cuba Vacations. Irrespective of your interests or degree of adventure, Cuba really has something for everyone.

1. Diving and Snorkeling in Cuba is very underrated. The plentiful marine wildlife and coral reefs are put in a number of the very best diving conditions to be found everywhere. Perfect water temperature and requirements along with amazing caves, walls and wrecks have experienced the great and late Jacques Cousteau calling Cuba one of the best dive locations in the world.

2. Hiking in Cuba through untouched rainforests, jungle regions and the largest wetland in the Caribbean along among 100 nature paths not only provides fantastic scenery but also a opportunity to discover hidden waterfalls, hot springs and part of their pure beauty of Cuba which can only be achieved by foot. Suffering through the Sierra Maestra Mountains near Santiago de Cuba you can come across the hideout of Fidel, Che and the rebels throughout the revolution.

3. Birding and Wildlife watching in Cuba is a hit among nature lovers. 6 UNESCO biospheres covering 22 percent of the island are a refuge to a number of the very exotic and endangered species of birds and reptiles. Several tours are available across the island as preservation is taken seriously in Cuba along with the Natural Parks are a source of national pride.

4. Architecture across the island is varied yet places such as Trinidad, Havana and Camaguey possess some of the best examples of Spanish Colonial architecture that serve up a glance not only Cuba's history however a looks at how things were back in the days of pirates and Spanish guideline within the Caribbean.

5. Adventure and adrenaline junkies can spend days off from the hotels by taking in zip-lining over jungle canopy, mountain and rock climbing, caving through broad mazes of stalactites or carrying a jeep safari through the rainforests. Excursions by horseback up the Sierra Maestra mountains is ideal for the laid back adventurer whilst paragliding off the summit will provide the rush to get a more extreme traveler.

6. Road Tripping round the countryside is an excellent way to observe the property and meet the natives. Cubans often hitch rides as way of public transport and will quickly become a manual eager to show off their country. While not for everyone, this is an excellent method to get insight to the Cuban culture and hang out with a brand new buddy all for the cost of a trip to another city.

7. Golfing in Cuba is the most recent venture in ways of bringing yet another clientele to the country. While still in its infancy, Varadero has the ideal location and spectacle for the 18 hole course that succeeds even the more advanced golfer. With more courses slated to start in the next few decades, Cuba could easily match areas such as the Dominican Republic for its wonder and challenge of hitting the hyperlinks in the Caribbean.

8. Deep Sea Fishing around the island can also be underrated as the abundance of fish can all but ensure a successful day on the water. Tuna, Swordfish, Sailfish, Barracuda and Grouper are Merely Some of the most Well-known fighters you'll land alone the North West Coast in the areas of Cayo Coco and Cayo Guillermo.

9. Carnivals and Festivals in Cuba are more than only a street festival; they are an all out party of music, dance, food and beverage. From Jazz festivals in Havana to Moncada parties in Santiago de Cuba, booking your Cuba Vacations during these festivals can get you off the shore and in the streets for an all out celebration you won't forget.

10. Historical Tours are one of the most well-known types of trips in Cuba mainly on account of the nation's incredible history from Spanish rule, to pirates and invaders, into the revolution. Che Guevara's iconic picture is everywhere in Cuba and you are hard pressed to prevent in any city without finding a museum or landmark dedicated to the revolution. Castles and Forts along the coast and in cities such as Havana and Camaguey remind of all those days when pirates always attempted to plunder the wealth from what was one of the richest nations in the Americas.

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