#also the way this is my least favorite song on the album…. heh!

[ennabear]

hi… do we like the purple……

[bonesandthebees]

Hi again Bee.

Thank you for lending an ear to listen even if I just kinda showed up. I really appreciate it. I've actually been reading through some of your other stories and they're very good (I adore the fae works!).

When it comes to Wilbur, I'm just. Very disappointed and upset. Of course I support Shubble and am glad she spoke out, it's very important and I'm glad that it's encouraged others to come forward with their own stories of abuse at the hands of large creators. At the same time though part of me wishes she hadn't said anything, so I could have continued as I was, in blissful ignorance, even if I feel really guilty for thinking like that.

It just saddens me that someone I looked up to so much ended up being this horrible person. It makes me worried that I too am bad, that somehow he has imprinted his awfulness unto me. I used to be horrible too. I like to think I've grown as a person, I was only a kid, but have I? Or was being drawn to Wilbur a sign? Like attracting like?

Y'know, I used to say that my hair style goals were how Wilbur's hair is, and recently I got a haircut. When I took a shower earlier it ended up floofing up in a similar way to his. I don't know how to feel about that. Maybe I should style it differently, even though I like the floof. I don't want to be even a little reminiscent of an abuser.

I am reminiscent of him though, in ways I can't change. I used to feel so seen by him, we're both song writers, and hypochondriacs, and I wanted to be him so badly I would cry. I would cry because he was everything I desperately craved to be as an insecure transmasc, an attractive guy with a beautiful voice and an amazing life. And now he's horrible, and probably always has been, and all of my memories of him are tainted.

I hate that I can't listen to Lovejoy anymore. It feels unfair to the other band members. It isn't their fault Wilbur is awful, and yet I'm taking away a source of their income. I know I'm taking away from Wilbur too, but he's only one person out of the group. Maybe that's just me giving an excuse so that I won't have to stop enjoying their music. It doesn't matter, I can't stomach listening to them anymore anyways.

I keep getting songs from YCGMA stuck in my head. It's like now that I can't listen to it anymore my brain has decided to fuck with me by making me listen to it anyways. I can't even justify listening to that album, that's just Wilbur's music. I was going to cover a song from that album for fun. Now I can't.

Is it bad I still find comfort in Wilbur as a character? C!Tommy is my favorite, but C!Wilbur is almost always a huge part of any C!Tommy story and I love C!Wilbur stories too. I know C! ≠ CC! but I just. It's complicated.

Idek why I'm this upset. I haven't been an avid watcher of anyone in the DSMP in at least over a year. If anything this whole thing has brought me back into the fandom more than I have been in ages. I feel bad about that, but also this situation has introduced me to people like Aimsey, whose content I'm seeing more of and I find myself enjoying.

I've also found more great DSMP fics lately in my quest to binge read them before the mass deletions start. Is it bad to find good things in a bad situation?

I'm sorry for the lack of put togetherness and the length of this ask. I promise I'm usually more coherent and to the point.

-Tech (just call me Tech like a name, "tech anon" feels weird heh)

hey tech, sorry for a bit of a late reply I've been busy the past few days

(sorry about the 'tech anon' thing, it's just a habit since that's how I refer to most of my anons. I'm going to still tag your ask as tech anon though just for my tagging system if that's okay)

I'm so glad you like the fae stories!! I'm still so proud of both of those looking back on them

anyway, yeah, I get that. I get the guilty wish that none of this had ever come out so you could just continue to go on in blissful ignorance. when someone learns something very upsetting, it's only natural to feel like you wish you never learned that. you don't need to feel guilty for that. you're not a bad person for your emotional reactions to things. your actions are what matters.

also, you are in no way a bad person because you were drawn to wilbur's content. the persona wilbur put on for the internet was not representative of who he actually was. you were drawn to the facade. an illusion of the person wilbur could've been, if he actually practiced the things he preached. you said you used to be a bad person, but you've changed. the fact that you are worried at all that you might still be bad shows a level of self-awareness and concern that wilbur apparently did not have. because wilbur was aware he was a bad person and treated the people around him terribly, but he didn't care to try and be better. as long as you're trying to be better, you're already leagues ahead of him.

also, regarding the hair, the floofy fringe is an incredibly common haircut. that is not exclusive to wilbur soot. you do not look like him if your hair does the floof similarly to his, it just makes you look like thousands of other dudes with fluffy fringe.

the day after shelby first streamed I had an MSR song stuck in my head and I hated it so much. it really sucks. you just have to try and drown it out with other music

it's not hypocritical at all to still find comfort in c!wilbur. I know it's complicated, and there's so much discussion I could get into as to why it's so complicated, but we can all separate the guy and the character in our heads. there's no reason to feel guilty about that. and there's also nothing bad about finding good in this situation. I think it's really sweet that you've found so many great fics in this time and I'm so glad you've been getting comfort from them. you're appreciating the authors hard work and that's a good thing! you don't need to feel bad about that

I hope you're doing okay tech

[yakool-foolio]

1, 8, 9 and 17 for the music ask thing? or as many of these as you feel like answering! (also hope your Horrors subside soon, sucks to have those right in the morning :/)

Anxiety is a bitch ass mofo but it is no match for the power of eating a Warhead candy to ensnare the bad vibes and banish them to the furthest recesses of my mind by taking a refreshing walk (in 90 degrees Fahrenheit, but hey at least there was a breeze). ANYWAY, onto the music!

A song I liked as a child

As I've stated in a previous ask game, I grew up with a ton of 80s music thanks to my mom. However, I can definitely pinpoint one artist that defined my earliest memories, especially when I started singing lessons at eight years old. That would be Michael Jackson! I remember my first singing tutor gifting me a whole compositional book that contained all the songs from 'The Essential Michael Jackson' album (and I think I still have it). I honestly couldn't tell ya which exactly was my favorite of his music way back when, but Smooth Criminal stands out most! Maybe this was the first sign of me having an affinity for murder mystery games heh.

8. A song from a soundtrack

It'd be cruel of me to simply choose just one track as an instrumental enthusiast. So, for a lightning round, I'll link one song (as if that isn't hard enough on me) from every personally influential media's OST (and if it's from a media series, then only one installment) that comes to my mind. Forbidden Friendship from How To Train Your Dragon. Connie's Theme from Steven Universe. Love As A Construct from Portal 2. Death By Glamour from Undertale. Theme Of Laura from Silent Hill 2. Closing Argument V3 from Danganronpa V3. Morusque - Eliza from Stray. Scarlet Feast - Malzeno from Monster Hunter Rise Sunbreak. Pressing Pursuit from Apollo Justice. Okay okay I'll stop now.

9. A song in a language I don’t speak

I don't tend to actively search out songs in another language, but whenever a song like that floats into my periphery, I'll give it a listen and think 'yeah this is awesome'. J-Pop is the most common of these occurrences. So, I present 想いきり by Indigo La End!

17. A cover song

OH BOY A CHANCE TO TALK ABOUT MY FAVORITE COVER! IF YOU HAVEN'T HEARD CANDLE ON THE WATER BY MIRACLE MUSICAL THEN I IMPLORE YOU TO LISTEN TO IT, AND IF YOU ALREADY HAVE, THEN LISTEN TO IT AGAIN!

The original song is already beautiful, but this one just hits different on an entirely new level of ascension to a higher plane of bliss. It's a song I've loved for many years, and I'll never forget it. The only downside is that it's not on Spotify. If it was, it'd be my number one song every year.

[happyinjection]

♠️♥️High Card Short Story 5 “Poison Phenomenon” (2/3)♦️♣️

Enter Finn and Leo, who surprisingly gained mutual understanding through a favorite band. Work forgotten, thus the listening session began...

Original: https://twitter.com/highcard_pj/status/1539805709390344193

Author: https://twitter.com/poipheno

On Leo’s orders, the office had not the usual bland BGM, but Poipheno’s coolest FK rock playing.

I immersed myself in the sound, listening intently.

With his arms folded Leo closed his eyes, while Wendy, as she furrowed her brows, was listening with a difficult look on her face. Vijay, with an unwavering serene expression which I couldn’t really figure out, was keeping his eyes fixed on his houseplant.

The song that I picked from their second album, “Love Imitation”, was finally over.

“How was that!”

I quickly turned back to Wendy.

“Hm. Well, it’s cool, I guess...”

“I know right?? Let’s get to the next song, Leo!”

“Hit it.”

“Damn, I can’t hold back any longer!”

I took off my suit jacket and shirt. An orange t-shirt appeared.

“Oi, Finn. Pinochle employees shouldn’t wear t-shirts underneath their suits. It’s improper.”

Leo chided me.

“So what, this is my lucky item. Look!”

I turned my back. A Poison Phenomenon logo was conspicuously put there as a backprint.

Wendy could only stare at me with a questioning look on her face. “Is that what you call a band tee?”

“Exactly! Isn’t it cool!”

“Uh, yeah. Cool, it’s cool alright.”

Suddenly Vijay butted in.

“The rippling-like part of the P serves to show that the titular ‘poisonous effect’ as the band was named after is still going on.”

“Why are you even elaborating?”

After that, our Poipheno listening session continued for a while. At first we only played my top songs from their early days, but eventually we also began to play Leo’s Selections of the works from their middle and current era. While listening, my body naturally moved along.

“Enjoying yourself, aren’t you, Finn.”

“You bet I am. They became a hit ‘cause they shifted to a more danceable music since the middle era. Rock that you can dance to, isn’t it the best.”

“The fact that even a lowlife such as you can also enjoy it is the greatest thing about Poipheno.”

Only when Poipheno was the subject of matter I would overlook Leo’s needlessly snide remarks. All of a sudden, Vijay spoke up.

“Finn is quite talented, huh. It’s an honor, so please show me more.”

“Ah? What about?”

“Your dance, you can dance, can’t you? Please show me, Justin seems to be excited about it as well.”

Vijay nudged the pot of his houseplant toward me.

“Plants don’t dance.”

“Oi, don’t push your beliefs into the stuff Vijay says.”

There was a rare hint of confusion on Leo’s expression.

“The cells are moving due to sound waves. Come, Finn, take a look too.”

“Vijay, don’t be ridiculous. Do you think Finn can dance?”

Wendy might have meant to follow it up with something, but before she can say anything else, it passed my mind.

I immediately got to my feet.

Just like that, I rolled my way right to the center of the showroom, and then used the momentum to do a forward somersault. I heard Wendy let out a quiet scream. And then, with a few shakes of my body to the music, I dove shoulder-first into the floor. Spreading my thighs open to maintain the momentum I kept spinning round and round, before finally leaped back upright.

“Heh. I can at least do this much.”

It was break dance. Using my thumb, I brushed the tip of my nose.

Wendy cheered in a shrill voice.

“Amazing, Finn! That was cool!”

“Eh, for real? Hehehe. I learned it from a friend who did street dance. I can also do the head spinning thing, y’know.”

“If you tear your suit I’m going to cut it from your paycheck.”

Leo reminded me. Getting my salary deducted is a big problem. If I ruin my suit while on a mission the expenses would get covered, but if I ruin my suit over a stupid matter like this, Leo would really make me pay.

Right as I decided to stop doing acrobatic moves---

“Even so, you’re a well-trained monkey. Shall I give you a banana as a reward?”

There he went again.

“A~ah? Bastard, ain’t ya just chickening out ‘cause you can’t dance--?”

“Hold on, Finn, don’t easily take the bait. Leo, you should give an honest praise too, shouldn’t you.”

“Leo~ Ain’t ya the type to cry uncontrollably in school plays ‘cause you can’t dance, ya little shit?”

As though on cue Leo walked up and stood in front of me.

From below, he shot me a glare. The glint in his eyes was not of a 14 years old.

“Oh, got something on your mind? Do you want a crash course in boxing?”

♠️♥️♦️♣️

TL notes: I’m in no way a professional translator so if you find any mistakes, please do not hesitate to inform me right away. I love the High Card gang and I found it very unfortunate that while it is meant to be a multimedia project, I can’t seem to find the translated versions of any materials (beside the anime) anywhere (if this is against copyright, I will take it down). Hopefully this small TL would help international viewers gain better understanding of HC universe and characters. The author of these SS himself said that he hoped fans would have their “so that’s what it is!” moments when they watch the anime after reading his short stories. So with that in mind, let’s enjoy High Card together~

[demarogue]

Get to Know the Blogger

Tagged by @crackinglamb and @serial-chillr​ – thank you for thinking of me! Your answers are much cooler than mine will be. Stealing Serial’s strategy of telling the story with pictures.

Share your wallpaper: I once downloaded one of those “make your whole phone experience feel aesthetic” apps, and it was quite underwhelming, but I’ve kept the background. 

Last song you listened to: I’m on a Bad Omens kick right now, and at any given moment I’d choose a different song from the new album but I think most recent is Like a Villain. 

Currently reading: This range is weird AF, I admit. I’m also listening to ACOFAS and reading CC2 on kindle. Basically my adhd strategy is to have active reads all over the house so if I feel like reading, something is at hand. I had to run around to gather these, ha!

Last movie: John Wick, which...I dunno man, I’m tired. The first one was so good and now there’s just so much action and so little plot that the action feels tedious. Beautifully shot, though!

Last show: Sanditon season 3. LOVE a period drama, even a silly one.

Craving: Like Serial, I am also really craving spring and warm weather and gardening and hiking and and and. This winter has been SO long.

What are you wearing right now: Way more dressed up than usual LOL. Black cashmere sweater dress, leopard leggings, lined black knee-highs, leather jacket. Usually I’m in joggers and a sweater though. I’m trying to inject some mojo into my life with fashun. 

How tall are you: somewhere between 5′9″ and 5′10″ (~177cm)

Piercings: Just ears, and fun fact, they are slightly uneven because I got them done at a mall kiosk when I was 9.

Tattoos: none yet, I have too many ideas and commitment issues. 

Glasses? Contacts? Neither, I have annoyingly perfect vision

Last drink: matcha latte, and I am my own barista ;)

Last thing you ate: I am being extremely terrible about food right now but at least I’ve had a piece of toast with almond butter heh...I guess I’ll go downstairs and make lunch

Favorite color: no. I can’t do it.

Current obsession: I feel like I am too absorbed in my MFA to have an obsession outside of it, so I guess historical trends in architecture and design!?!? I’m digging the module we’re doing on Art Deco a lot.

Any pets: Dog and Cat – Grover and Weasel, respectively

Favorite fictional character: Sybel from The Forgotten Beasts of Eld, by McKillip (as you can see I love McKillip with my whole heart)

The last place you traveled: Just got back from Maryland! I was in Baltimore and DC.

Tagging @ultadverb​ @thesistersarcheron​ @soopsiedaisies​ @skjalla​ I could keep going but if you wanna do it, consider yourself tagged by me. I love reading y’all’s answers!

[himbos-hotline]

Top 5 albums that you think changed your life forever (my favorite question to ask everyone)

I can tell that these are gonna be very sappy and very sentimental and I am gonna feel so many emotions about it.

1 The sound of music.

It was the first musical my nan took me too when I was four years old. I cried so hard that I nearly threw up and some random stranger brought me an ice cream. I remember skipping home singing do rai me. Its what got me into musicals, which then lead to me getting into singing and acting and that now is what I wanna do in life. I met wonderful friends because of musicals and I don't think I would be the person I am today if my nan didnt take to see it. The theatre she took me too is still around and I really should go to get tickets to see something.

2 Handwritten [delux version]

My big sibling sent me one of the songs [handwritten] when I think I was sixteen and honestly at the worse point in my life. I adored the song and the band and now its in every playlist I make. I refuse to skip the song whenever it plays. My big sibling has supported me through fandoms, gender crisis, nights where everything feels wrong, panic attacks. They were on the phone after my first doctors appointment coming out as trans, were on the phone when I tried on my binder for the first time. Every important moment in my life they've been there. I honestly wouldnt be here if they didnt exist. I would not be writing, I would not be making characters or drawing or doing anything I find love in. I wouldnt feel so comfident in myself.

@itsnoosetome I know we don't do emotions because ew gross, bad icky. But I honestly just wanna say thank you for being so supportive to me. I love you so much, you've helped shape me into the boy I am and im not scared of things to come because I know that you will always be there. I am so thankful that we met and I am so fucking happy that we're friends, im happy that were still writing together and you listen to my writing. I am so happy to call you my big sibling and I love you so much. You're such a good person and I just love you a lot.

*poke* there no more emotions heh.

3. The black parade

I was once an angry 14 year old who used loud music to block out the voices in my head [Look, DiD is a weird fucking thing] It would block out the shitty thoughts and sometimes I still lsiten through the songs and theyre nice to yell in the park or when im home alone and need to scream my emotions away. I think a lot of MCR's like lyrics and the way they write them leads itself to my flowery language I gues. I dont know I just feel like if I didnt fuck my ears forever I wouldnt be here writing stupid flowery sentences and using abstract concepts that I hope make sense.

4. Anything julie andrews

My great grandma had dementia and used to listen to her songs over and over again. I remember sitting with her about a week or two before she died singing along ot somewhere over the rainbow. The memory still hurts because I don't think she knew who I was. Sometimes I wish that I spent more time with her or at least remembered their voices. I miss her and my great grandpa and my uncle. Theres a lot of good painful memorys when I listen to her voice. My great grandma taught me to love the little parts of music and in this, is what also spurred me on to sing.

5. Anything from the simpsons and/or queen

My great uncle and I used to watch the simpsons together whenever my nan and I would visit. I remeber sitting surrounded by cats watching who shot mister burns. I still sit and listen to homers barbershop quartet and remember singing along at aged nine.

Queen is my grandpas favourite band. I grew up listening to their music and it shaped my music taste today. I remember being a little kid and telling my nan I wanted to be Freddy Mercury. I grew up listening to music and its such an important part of who I am both as a person and as a system.

______

WC: 2,128 words FIC: unnamed fic This ask motivated me to write 685 new words

[00101110t]

Art dump 6

Initially I wanted to spam-post them but I saw that they are too many so I eventually chose to post them in a single post

I'm actually proud of these for once

I've listened to this song an unhealthy amount of times since the album came out

[Also I spent way too much time trying to figure out if the “were” from the lyrics is a typo or not in the official lyrics, including listening to a few videos to hear how "were” and “where” are pronounced and which one matches the way it’s sung]

Sometimes I get very clear ideas for drawings inspired by songs (This doesn’t mean they end up looking like I imagined them though)

[Obligatory "it's not my birthday I just like the song"] [But my account turns 2 years old soon!]

I wish my meds would stop failing to work after a week just because I'm too sad for them to do their job

My favorite part of the day is telling everyone that "I'm suffering :)" and then going home and crying

The fact that most of my drawings from the past few months are inspired by me missing one (1) person

[Also "Guardians" would've been such a good song. Too bad it got cancelled. At least I can still listen to the low quality leak (that I’m not going to link. Find it yourself)]

I've had an idea for this drawing months ago, but I didn't like how the sketch came out. This one's way better

I'll say it now: "00101110" is a reference to Yuma

[I wish I had PLRKLR t shirts irl]

Here's an underrated band that makes good music :-)

I love skeletons and drawing them :-)

(This one’s based on “diaphonization”, which makes the bones pink and the cartilages blue, while the rest of the tissues are transparent)

Just a quick sketch with things that are wrong with me. Nothing more to say about this one

heh

It was fun while it lasted

[dancing-to-architecture]

17 of 1001

Today's album: Super Furry Animals - Rings Around the World (2001)

Initial thoughts: I have never heard of this band. I know this because i would certainly have remembered the worst band name since hoobastank. Cool looking album cover, though.

Alternate Route to Vulcan Street-

Prettier than i was expecting, tbh. Kinda dig the spacy vibe. Singer is mumbly, but there's a lot of processing on the vocals and that's not helping matters.

Sidewalk Serfer Girl-

Oh yeah, a meaningless misspelling. Woo.

Guitar's nice and heavy but the lyrics are a jumbled and overdubbed word salad.

Chorus is catchy, but kinda stupid.

(Drawing) Rings Around the World-

Okay, the end of this song is fucking obnoxious.

Now, I honestly and without irony enjoy music that some other people have described as "truly heinous shit", but this is a very specific kind of obnoxious. Beeping and ringing noises are just irritating as hell.

Also, do *any* of their songs' lyrics mean anything?

It's Not the End of the World?-

Okay, I'm immediately made an asshole by this album, because this one is kinda sweet.

Kinda feels a bit like a slower early OK GO song, tbh.

Receptacle for the Respectable-

Credit where credit is due: that's the nicest way to call somebody a "posh cum dumpster" that I've ever seen.

[A] Touch Sensitive-

A nice spacy vibey instrumental. I kinda dig this one.

Shoot Doris Day-

Ah, fuck, he's singing some nonsensical bullshit again. It's like the kinda shit that sounds somewhat deep but then you actually read it and it's just "yeah, these words rhyme and follow the metric foot".

Miniature-

Ooh, another instrumental!

Oh, it's 40 seconds long.

And kinda just some warbles.

No Sympathy-

Sounds like it's half a country song, half an early led zeppelin song.

Reads like it was written by a pissed off 14 year old. Like, real nu-metal lyric hours over here.

The lyrics continue to be the worst part of this band.

Long outro, but it gets kinda rad at the end, not gonna lie. Almost a bit like Aphex Twin just dropping out of nowhere.

...Someone somewhere is having the absolute inverse experience as i am, just vibing for a few minutes on the meanest song I've heard in years, and then just fuckin HATING this weird IDM/psytrance outro.

Juxtapozed with U-

Japanese City Pop vibes right off the bat.

2001 autotune sounded like dogshit. Lyrics are stupid as hell, as per usual.

I will *never* not be mad at landlords, weird British guy.

Wait, *THIS* is their most-played song!? This has been played over 9 *million* times?

Who the fuck is this band for?

Are y'all okay, England?

Presidential Suite-

Oh Jesus, some goddamn Bill Clinton/Monica Lewinsky shit? Oh heh heh, all those drunken Russians? Yeah, fuck all the way off, ya smug shit.

I have to wonder how this guy feels about the last 8 years of UK politics. Clown shoe fits a bit different now, don't it?

Run! Christian, Run!-

What? No, this song is 8 minutes long!? Yeah, no. Fuck this.

This band sucks absolute shit and I'm bailing on this album.

Fragile Happiness-

Don't care. I read the stupid lyrics and i don't care.

How was this band popular 20 years ago? How are they popular now? Over 140,000 monthly listeners in the year of our lard Two Thousand and Twenty Three? What is wrong with you people? Who hurt you? And why are you trying to fix it with... *THIS*?

My wife's perspective: "supremely unremarkable"

Favorite Track: [A] Touch Sensitive, as it's the only one the singer didn't fuck up with his mouth.

Least Favorite Track: literally everything else.

[biffhofosho]

NO WAY!! I can't believe your bias is Hyungwon also. I feel like I never meet other monbebe who are in his lane :( Fun fact, I actually couldn't pick a bias for such a long time because of how much I love all of them. One day, however, I was showing my friend one of their music videos and they asked me who my bias was. I balked at first but ultimately I had to admit I always felt so validated, appreciated, and moved by what wonnie had to say.

His songs made me feel something, unlike other artists(not compared to the other members lol). He has such a way with words and as an avid reader, I fell in love with how he wrote. His personality played a huge role in my trip also haha. I feel so safe when I listen to him sing or read stories about him. His disposition was similar to mine, I am an INTJ, and his fearless nature helped me gain confidence in myself.

ALSO, I am in awe that Wonho was your semi-first bias of MX, considering he was the one who got me into them. I saw a TikTok of him dancing and I was immediately absorbed by his energetic yet smooth style. After that, I searched them up and fell in love lol.

Although Hyungwon holds my heart, I must say Kihyun bias wrecks me so hard all the time, which isn't helpful when MX are my ults.

Anyway, enough about me, who's your bias wrecker? I feel like you are possibly a Honey mbb lol. You give off such a comforting and kind energy, yet an intelligent and analytical one at the same time. Getting to know you has already been such fun, I can't wait to develop our friendship further! Speaking of which, how should I call you? I figured since you call me Santa lol you deserve a nickname also haha(I hope that didn't come off the wrong way!)

xox mbb Secret Santa

p.s. remember to drink lots of water and eat well!! much love :)

Sorry for taking a while to respond! Weekends are busy because I do many things with my husband and kiddo, and I wanted to give you a nice, long response for your very nice, long ask. <3

You can call me Dutch or Biff on here or any kind of silly pet name you want--I'm only picky about food haha. (My real name is reserved for DMs where MX can never find me embarrassing myself lol.)

Oh, it's so true, isn't it! Where is the Hyungwon praise, people?!? At least that means it's less we have to share of him haha. :D Stil, Hyungwon (and all seven boys) deserves all the love and best things in the world. I feel like he's really only become truly comfortable in his idoldom since Wonho left, as it was pretty easy to take introvert shelter in Wonho's tremendous wingspan heh heh.

Yes, Hyungwon is as unintentionally funny as he is intentionally funny. Since Inssaoppa, too, he's really been flexing his quick wit and wordplay, and I'm here for all of it. I love that he's been given more and more creative freedom, too. He's an INFP like me, and if we can't create, we wither and die.

Almost all of my all-time fave MX tracks are written by Wonnie, particularly "Mercy" (though I hadn't realized he'd written that song until long after it had been my favorite). I remember the first time I played the No Limit album in my headphones. I had intended to fall asleep listening, but the second "Mercy" hit, an entire universe opened behind my eyes. I cried into my sheets lol. That song rattled my bones. Needless to say, it's my favorite from their whole discography, and I started an entire novel around it. So, yeah, there's that.

I'm not sure if I have a clear bias wrecker since they've all wrecked each other for me for years lol. If I go by non-Hyungwon fics I've written, my favorites tend to be Kihyun's. If I go by the numbers of photos I've saved per member, Minhyuk's and Wonho's are a dead-heat in terms of how many photos I've saved. And aren't we all Honeybebes at heart? ;) I feel the same intense compulsion to put Jooheon's head in my lap and stroke his hair that every single member of MX does. *sighs* He must me adored and babied at all costs. :D

Oh man, I've got you fooled haha. But thank you for saying such nice things about me. If I give off a 1/16th of the warmth Jooheon does, that's the highest compliment I can think of (behind you saying I write like Hyungwon *continues to sob for all eternity*).

I feel like we were matched so well for Secret Santa omfg! Your energy is just my flavor, dear Santa. <3 Thank you for being so chatty with me. Is very, very lovely. :D Can't wait to chat more!

[dojae-huh]

How would you rank Empathy, Resonance, and Universe in categories? Like for aesthetics, songs, production, and so on?

Let's agree it's just a fan's opinion, unprofessional.

1) Musical album - Empathy

Well, it consists of title tracks, heh. It has an Intro (the iconic "Neo got my back") and Outro (the iconic "I see the Vision"). All songs are strong and are sorted in a nice order. It is an album, not a collection of songs. Many songs went through many revisions over several years, they were perfected. The genres differ, there are surprises ("Touch" for 127 and "Go" for Dream).

Both Resonance and Universe are not as even when it comes to how memorable the songs are. And it's harder to listen to them without skipping some songs at least sometimes. Which is not surprising giving: a) time constraints, b) the number of new combinations and members.

2) Title tracks and MVs - Resonance

"Make a Wish" and "The 90s love" hit it big. Even "Resonance", a confusing mix of 4 songs, got high views. The "From home" performance on MAMA made people ask for the names of vocals. "Work it" also was noticed.

3) Aesthetics - Empathy

The "Boss" promotional run, the introduction of animation with "Yestoday" (which is still the artsiest MV by NCT), 2 MVs in Ukraine with snow and a Soviet library with mosaics, 2 MVs on the streets, "Black on Black" pyramid formation, 2018 Yearbook, NCTmentaries.

"Boss" costumes are iconic. There is nothing close from other boygroups despite this "military" style being used many times in fashion.

4) Preparation/Countdown - Universe

I know, it's rushed. Many didn't like that "Favorite" was cut short. And still, the first step of the promotion (before the album release) was good. Good pacing, good pictures, beautiful NCTmentaries, track videos. And don't forget that SM had to work around Lucas' absence from the project (how many songs had to be re-edited? we'll never know), WW and Ten being in China. Just imagine the logistics of song recordings, costume fitting, MVs and photo shootings. And the final result didn't even suffer.

5) Promotion/Impact - Empathy and Resonance

I'm torn between these two. Empathy introduced vlives. NCT on vlive had existed prior to 2018 but the platform hadn't been used to showcase individual members the way the Empathy era did. Lucas and Jungwoo entered with a bang. Ten did a successful return. Dream entered a new phase (a rebellious teenager image). It felt like that era was the real launch of NCT. "Now we get serious". 5 singles were promoted on music shows.

Resonance involved a lot of big projects (NCT World 2.0, MAMA performance), YT content, WayV officially became NCT (and got better noticed, which is evident from the following unit's album sales), big sales numbers for both parts.

Both eras brought in many new fans.

[puppy-phum]

Now that this hell year is almost over let’s celebrate the good things! If you’re receiving this it means you have made someone’s year better. Tell who on tumblr has made this year better for you (as many people as you like, it can be something as small as liking your posts or sending something sweet) and share some of the content you’ve enjoyed (your own or others)

thank you so much dear anon! ♥ I am happy to know that I’ve managed to make someone’s year at least a tiny bit better :’) as a year on tumblr, this year has been very special to me personally so am happy to know that someone has felt that too!

this is going to be a huge list so be warned! putting it under the cut bc of that~

@i-am-just-a-kiddo you are and will always be on this list first and foremost. you and our friendship is the best thing I have gotten from this hellsite and I continue being thankful for it ♥ I always have so much fun talking to you, you support me so unconditionally, share things with me and allow me to just yell about things every day! you never get bored of that endless stream of random nonsense I pour on you and it means so much to me ♥ I also feel honored to share your things, to see your paintings and read your writings and just be there for you. let’s hope the next year will be kinder to us and the world in general! and hey, maybe you get into guardian at some point heh (and thank you for getting into so many things with me this year already!)

@leonzhng I think I said this at some point too but you were the reason why I got into this community we have going on with @mdzsnet and gave me the confidence to just approach ppl here and love things together ♥ you are always so sweet and kind and lovable and I appreciate you doing all the things you do. your edits are amazing and inspirational and I love all the tag games we keep throwing around :’D 

@ashenwren you!! you are amazing and I’m so happy to have gotten to know you through our network :’) I am excited every day when I get to talk to you, even if it’s just for a moment as our timezones make everything kind of difficult :’D it’s just so nice to share mdzs and dmbj with you, to help you get into these dramas, to share all these ideas and thoughts we have, to share our different cultures and languages and whatnot. you are always so supportive and excited and kind and I wish I could hug you sometimes! I hope I still can write something more for pingxie and that I get to see a ton of your art! ♥

then to all the wonderful ppl in our network who have made my tumblr experience so wonderful this year, who keep being kind and amazing and full of so much talent! to @manhasetardis @aheartfullofjolllly @bees0are0awesome @highwarlockkareena @yibobibo @linglynz @yiqiie @wangxiians @leoyunxi @tiesanjiao @lan-xichens @oneautumnfox @aowyn @wangxianbunnydoodles @weiwuxcian and many others who I might have forgotten: I enjoy seeing you in my notes so much, I enjoy all of your content, seeing us all interact with each other and just being very friendly and welcoming ♥ I am thankful every day that I got to join this network and learn to know so many! continue being awesome and have a nice upcoming year :’)

then quickly to:

@lzswy thank you for loving my music and wanting to know me! I hope we get to talk some more and feel free to push music my way too, am always ready to drown in songs :’)

@kholran thank you for doing my tag games and allowing me to talk to you, to call you my friend, and share my love for liu sang! I will once again tell you that your fic (link here if anyone reading this is interested) was amazing and I hope we get to talk some more! 

and then thank you to all the ppl who I see in my notes all the time and leave amazing tags and just love me with interacting with my content and sometimes making it more known and just giving it their all: @btssjamss @a-force-dyad-in-space @cuppyhands @mylastbraincql @drwcn @fytheuntamed @distantsnows @brutalbeetle @intimisky @kazaore @inessencedevided @bluebelle88 @actualmichelle @sassyassassy @thebeautifulmacabre @merinnan @inkblue-black and many others who I might not recognize or remember or find right now! or who I have already mentioned in the network part bc you guys are awesome like that :’) especially when I have tried out new things this year and have dipped into new fandoms and reached out of this mdzs pit I am still in and unwilling to leave ♥ but you are still there and like my content haha

and then I want to mention some of my favorite works this year (I’ll try to pick one per month from my archives oh boy): 

@i-am-just-a-kiddo‘s amazing niemo fic that owns my heart, soul, and the never to be born firstborn ♥ 

@bloody-bee-tea‘s amazing mdzs related fics that always just make my heart clench but also bring me so much joy!

this amazing wangxian edit that still shatters me

this amazing wwx edit by hanyi ♥ @leonzhng I love the quote in this and this breaks me in all the best ways!

@fytheuntamed‘s whole the untamed memes series that single-handedly has saved this year for me (tho I suppose this started earlier than this year but who cares, quality content either way)

this jc outfits collection post by @linglynz ♥ everything for my am-a-hoe-for-the-angry-purple-guy -needs

this amazing art by @/hana-tox that still gives me so many feels that I feel like bursting 

this stunning edit set for the best album that dropped this year, map of the soul: 7, by @/kassareo

this wangxian edit that inspired me a lot and still makes me catch my breath bc damn that looks gorgeous (by @/itsazbitch)

another very inspirational edit set by @/sammyholdsacandle (some might recognize which one of my edits got inspired by this a lot lol) 

this very beautiful post by @alienwlw that’s really just goals tbh 

@sarawatsaraleo‘s favorite the untamed scenes series, every one of these edits is a huge joy and so beautifully done! ♥

@tiesanjiao‘s wonderful, wonderful wangxian edit that keeps being my one of my favorites ever and just. inspires me to this day, I hope one day I can gif :’D ♥

another one of my absolute favorites is this edit by hanyi again ♥ you just have the best ideas and you make everything so pretty!

this soft but heartbreaking, delicate but so emotional edit by @gusucloud ♥ I think I’ve never loved an edit this much, it’s so pretty and absolutely perfect!

this edit by @highwarlockkareena bc wth, the coloring? the gifs themselves?? gosh it looks so pretty and I might cry

@tiesanjiao‘s wonderful gifset made for the gif challenge that was going around during this time ;; as I was slowly falling in love with the iron triangle and dmbj in general, this felt like a blessing ♥ 

these absolutely stunning pieces of art by @/tiphs 

this absolutely gorgeous post for wwx’s bday by @alienwlw (all of this is just. perfect?? the colors, the gifs, the scenes... everything!)

this gorgeous edit by @distantsnows that makes me smile and cry at the same time ♥

this edit also by @distantsnows that is just. pure perfection?? bc fuck yes, sect leader jaing yanli!! I love you for this one

this edit by @lanzhansmiles bc the colors are just absolutely stunning and I love how they both sit there like that and just? wow 

this edit just makes me feel so many things and just looks so dreamy by @cescedes 

this adorable but also very painful edit by @manhasetardis ♥ I love all about this one :’)

and as a shameless self-promo (bc apparently I haven’t done enough of that lol) I want to mention my wu xie edit which was just so much fun to do and turned out so great and. I just love him a lot ok, he’s a wonderful character and zhu yilong played him so well ♥

I wish you all – all the ppl mentioned here and all who see this and all who still do not – a very merry christmas, happy holidays, and happy new years too! I hope the year 2021 will treat us all well and that you will remain as amazing, lovely, and wonderful as you all have been! ♥ 

[atmilliways]

On the 3rd day of Dethmas this writer gives to thee…

Dec 15 - Crossover with your favorite holiday song

The Little Drummer Boy is not actually my favorite Christmas song, but it's my dad's least favorite for some reason so it's always held a special place in my heart. 😈

Nathan/Skwisgaar/Pickles, but most of the action is Nathan/Skwisgaar and there’s some sneaky voyeurism going on while Pickles finishes recording his drum parts. Definitely Explicit. 

~

To Lay Before the King, Pa Rum Pum Pum Pum

Before recording sessions, the Klokateers always made sure to set up whichever instruments would be needed first in the booth well in advance. Since the band had spent most of yesterday waiting for Pickles to wake up from a “little lie-down nap” and still had yet to record the last of his parts for the new album so they could be done with this shit in time for Christmas, the drum kit was already in there and ready to go by the time Nathan and Skwisgaar snuck in.

They hid beneath the window so no one would spot them from the outside. Between the two of them, they had a couple bags worth of provisions and several blankets, for padding. While they waited, backs against the wall below the window, they passed a bag of artisanal (read: full of weed) gingerbread cookies and munched in companionable silence. 

Of course, they couldn’t hear what was going on outside. Their first indication that the rest of the guys had arrived wasn’t Knubbler’s nasal voice insisting for the hundredth time that this really had to get wrapped up to-day if they were going to meet the production schedule that Charles had laid out for them, or Pickles groaning at Murderface’s complaining about how unproductive they’d been the day before because someone had selfishly decided to pass out before sharing whatever he’d taken.

“Where’s Skwisgaar and Nathans?” Toki asked, taking his seat on the couch with a bounciness that everyone else in the studio resented. He was also wearing a Santa hat and the garish light-up holiday sweater any of them had ever had the misfortune to witness. 

“Who the fuck cares, dood,” Pickles snapped. “They both bitched me out last night, fuck those douchebags. I don’t need ‘em here to play drums.” And then he stormed around to the booth door. 

That’s when they knew it was showtime. The drum kit shielded them from sight until Pickles sat down, and even then he didn’t notice until he already had the headphones on. Plenty of time for both Skwisgaar to be making exaggerated shushing gestures and Nathan holding up a piece of paper by the time he looked at them and nearly fell off his seat. 

Knubbler must have said something over the mic, because Pickles’ eyes darted briefly between his hidden boyfriends and the window. They had ripped him a new one (figuratively) over missing the stupid recording session yesterday, but. . . .

In big block letters, Nathan’s sign read: 

JUST PLAY 4 A XMAS PRESENT AND U CAN JOIN WHEN U R DONE

Pickles hesitated as he thought it over. “. . . Nnnah, nothin’ man. Just, uh, missed a little, heh. Too much rum nog, tis the season. You know me.” He clapped his hands together and reached toward a back pocket for his sticks, one leg bouncing with sudden extra energy and enthusiasm. “Okay, let’s get this fuckin’ show on the road!”

Nathan flashed a grin and a thumbs up, then stopped the paper to put in his heavy duty earplugs. “You ready?” he mouthed to Skwisgaar. 

Skwisgaar, who already had his earplugs in, tossed his blond hair over one shoulder. “Alsways,” he mouthed back. “Lucky yous, Merry Christmas.”

“Smug asshole,” Nathan mouthed, but was grinning as he grabbed a handful of black shirt and tugged the other third of Dethklok’s creative team into a long kiss. Skwisgaar responded by crowding him down to lay on the blankets they’d spread out on the floor, keeping his hair to his far side so that Pickles would have an unobstructed view. The only sound in the booth was the quiet smack of their lips as they got a steady rhythm going. 

“. . . Christ, yeah, I’m goin’! Fuckin’ . . . now. No, just start the goddamn click track! . . . Okay. A-one, two, a-one two three—”

Between the earplugs and years of damaging their hearing with loud music, neither Nathan nor Skwisgaar heard the violent crash of percussion instruments as Pickles got going, only felt it. With the edibles just starting to kick in, it was like being wrapped in a fucking vibrator. Nathan bent a leg to brace across the floor and Skwisgaar ground eagerly against it while snaking a hand up the frontman’s t-shirt; Pickles skipped a beat and crashed to an abrupt stop. 

“Shut up, I’m fine! Start it again!”

They kicked their boots off. Nathan got a hand in between their bodies and gave Skwisgaar a squeeze through his jeans, smirking into a groan that flooded into his mouth. He expertly got the belt undone (lots of practice) and tugged the jeans open, shoving them down quickly so the zipper wouldn’t catch on anything (lots of freeballing); the rest was all up to Skwisgaar as he scrambled to yank both pants and shirt off without popping up into view through the window. 

Their kiss was an anchor, keeping his head down while his long arms flailed busily. Beneath him Nathan took full advantage of being on his back by only bothering to get his own jeans down to his thighs. When Skwisgaar broke the kiss to pull the shirt over his head Nathan cupped one hand to the back of his skull and helped keep him low . . . then urged him to move down. 

Skwisgaar’s blue eyes flicked to meet Nathan’s green ones, and they both looked in unison towards Pickles, who immediately lost grip on one of his sticks. 

“FUCKIN’. . . . No, Murderface, yer the butterfingers! Go take yer greasy mitts and go fuck yerself with ‘em!”

“Good ones,” Skwisgaar mouthed to Nathan. After all, the more Pickles screwed up, the longer they could keep doing this—and if there was anything he knew as well as playing guitar, it was drawing out pleasure. To that end, he licked his lips and slid down the other man’s mostly clothed body, a great big present all for him to unwrap, savoring the rasp of rough denim on his bare, sensitive skin. When he reached his destination and nuzzled the straining front of Nathan’s tighty whities he had the satisfaction of his hips twitching up in anticipation. 

For his part, Nathan wasn’t really thinking about drawing things out. The carrot was effectively dangling in front of the horse now and Pickles clearly wanted it; motivation achieved. They’d done good. As Skwisgaar slowly exposed him to the warm air in the booth, warmer breath ghosting over his eager cock along with methodical licks and kisses and nibbles, Nathan half wanted to melt into being taken apart piece by piece and half wanted him to hurry the fuck up, wrap those plush lips around the head and swallow him down already. His big hands tangled in blond hair but couldn’t decide what to do from there, so after a moment he just started absently scratching blunt, black-painted nails against Skwisgaar’s scalp the way he liked, earning an unheard hum that just about reduced Nathan to a puddle.

Thankfully, he had Skwisgaar to lap him up. 

“For the last. Fucking. Time. I do naht need a ‘Christmas snack,’ I do naht need a beer, I do naht need more cocaine, I want to hurry up and finish this fucking shit, so turn the gahddamn track back on and hit record or SO HELP ME—”

They couldn’t hear, but the vibrations around them were finally starting to carry the feeling of urgency and violence that the song called for. Skwisgaar noticed this distantly, but his pulse was racing to keep up with the beat and quickly sending more and more blood southward. Especially with the scalp massage Nathan was distractedly giving him sending waves of sensation rippling straight to his core. He licked his way up, dragging his tongue along the nearest convenient vein, savoring the taste of pre-come as he started to suck with one hand coiled around the thick base. His other hand was between his own legs, half fondling and half holding himself back from getting too excited too soon. 

The sensation of Pickles’ eyes on him as he took more of Nathan into his mouth was a thrill, like being plugged into an electrical socket. If it weren’t for that hand, he might be too far gone already for concentrating on teasing the cock that throbbed against his soft palate. 

It was hard to tell how much time passed as Skwisgaar drew the blowjob out until Nathan was practically weeping (not that he would ever admit it) with how much he wanted to just come already. Skwisgaar had him wrapped around his talented tongue, rendering all his brute strength useless (totally the edibles’ fault, he’d swear to it). At some point his hands had slipped from the man’s hair, one mindlessly clutching at the blankets beneath them instead while the other was crammed against his mouth to keep from making any sounds loud enough for the mic to pick up. 

Pickles, meanwhile, was playing so furiously that his entire body shook with the force of it, dreads flying and sweat dripping into his eyes, and even when he blinked it away he could still see the other two going at it. The vision of them was burned onto the back of his eyelids: Nathan with his head thrown back and his back arched while Skwisgaar absolutely wrecked him. Pickles wasn’t even thinking anymore, beyond a basic recognition that this might be some of the best shit he’d ever recorded, and the silent mantra (in tempo, naturally) of soon soon soon soon soon soon—

“Done!” he yelled, after crashing to a final halt, panting from the effort for a few seconds, and then jumping to his feet. “That was . . . theat was good, right?!” 

Ripping his eyes up from Skwisgaar releasing Nathan with a pop and gliding up to kiss the frontman and fondle their hard-ons together. . . . Ripping his eyes up from that, Pickles stared at Knubbler with a desperate intensity that made the producer roll back a bit in his chair. 

“Oh looks,” Toki crowed in amusement in the background, nudging Murderface and pointing for him to look. “Pickle gots a boner from playings drums!”

“What’sch wrong with you, I don’t want to schee that,” Murderface protested, looking anyway. 

“Tell me we’re done,” Pickles growled, eyes still boring into Knubbler’s robot ones. 

“Okay, okay, we’re done,” Knubbler said hastily. “Sheesh.” 

He pressed whatever buttons he needed to press to save the recording, blah blah blah, Pickles already wasn’t paying much attention anymore. He sat back down and immediately realized he was rocking slightly back and forth on his seat, trying to get some friction going. Fucking whatever. They could all think he was nuts and about to fuck his kit for all he cared, just as long as recording was done for the day and they would leave. 

Murderface left first, complaining about boners. Toki was next, saying something about some game he wanted to go play. When Knubbler was finished pressing buttons and whatever, he hesitated. “Hey Pickles, are you trippin’ balls in there?”

Oh god, he was so turned on that even Knubbler’s grating voice through the headphones, saying the word balls sent a jolt through him. “Yep,” he blurted out a little too loudly. “Trippin’ so many balls. So . . . fuck off, get outta here.”

“Okay, if you say so. . . .” Knubbler might have muttered something about Murderface being right regarding the inconsiderateness of not sharing, but he wasn’t holding the talkback button anymore and Pickles wasn’t paying attention except to make sure he left. 

As soon as Knubbler was out the door Pickles ripped the headphones off so hard they hit the wall of speakers behind him. Stranglingly tight pants and underwear were shoved hastily down at least to his ankles; he sent cymbal and hi-hat crashing to the floor and kicked out the base drum in front of him in his eagerness to get to the other side of the room, tripping on it. (They were rich as hell, there were plenty of replacements available.) Then he flailed the rest of the way out of his pant legs, losing both shoes and one sock in the struggle, and finished scrambling to his destination. 

The other two reacted more to the sudden flashes of movement than the sound. Nathan lolled his head around to look, and Skwisgaar looked up and blinked at him dazedly, but both smiled and reached out to welcome him in. He went for their earplugs first, specifically so he could whine “Fuckin dooshbeags” at them, then joined in for a Yuletide roll in the recording booth.

[popculture-etc]

Kenny Rogers, Adam Schlesinger,...coping with 2020

Worst year ever although there were some good.

It’s too early yet for me to do a quick look back on what 2020 is like here as we’re only going to be in the first of December tomorrow (it’s Nov 30 here) but I just have to as two losses this year broke me. Kind of, well, especially the second one.

You see, before East Asian pop, Jpop and Kpop, Western pop culture was my thing. It still is and this pandemic has made me go back to that recently starting with...the Beach Boys (their westcoast sound caught me, hook, line, and sinker and I wasn’t very fond of the Beatles to begin with...to be completely honest) I’m currently chillin’ to right now, as I write this post. I’m really weak to the westcoast sound. Beach sound/s in general, rather. I’m a big fan of the beach where nature goes, for one. Since some time, a few years ago, deep chill and tropical house music has been my go-to when I want to chill or calm myself down after an outburst of sorts and I put them on when I just feel meh, especially on Fridays. When I dream of being by the sea, the beach or in some island on my own. I live in a country with a lot of beaches and the Visayas here is basically island region Philippines, lol. Like most people, I listen to music according to mood just like the way I dress according to mood. And...it’s no wonder, really that I’m so into the Beach Boys now. RIP the Beatles. My dad played some songs of theirs on the guitar or so but the hold they have on me waned later on and I just think now how overrated they were back then. They did have good songs but when talking of good music, as in really good that it retains the same sound style or so, it’s the Beach Boys for me. Brian Wilson is the man despite his issues and personal struggles.

Anyway, we’re going quickly off tangent. I’ll save the Beach Boys fangirling for another day. lol.

I grew up with western pop culture rife all around me thanks to my American, cowboy country and folk music listening dad, my Carpenters-loving mom and then, college-aged aunts who’d made me see the Titanic film more than my fingers could count---the third is clearly an exaggeration but well...some of it is true and they were why I got into American films like Pretty Woman (we have this in good ol’ VHS in our family home, my grandparents’ in Jasaan), Mannequin, Ghost etc. in the late 80s, coming into the early 90s. So, tired of all the kdrama and uninteresting kvariety shows on tvn and the rebranded local channel, Kapamilya (long story for what we formerly know as ABS-CBN, the nation’s a mess right now and our gov’t’s just...ick!), I’d retreated to my cave and got into old tv shows I’d watched as a kid instead like Buffy the Vampire Slayer, Charmed and it’s been, well, moving on from there. I’m checking out Twin Peaks later. I’ve been watching old Hollywood films too. Some revisits on this include: Casablanca, Gone With The Wind, and especially A Streetcar Named Desire will always and forever be my favorite. Very young and cute and good looking Marlon Brando, ugh. I have some others in the stash which include Bonnie and Clyde I’ll be getting into much, much later, maybe over the weekends and holidays. In sum, I have a long history with western pop culture, especially America’s, more than I have with Japan’s and South Korea’s. The latter being very, very recent so it doesn’t really compare as much.

Let’s get right down to it...

So 2020 had us lose Kenny Rogers to natural causes on March 20 in a hospice and after, Adam Schlesinger to COVID 19 complications on April 1. I know the latter as the songwriter of The Wonders’ That Thing You Do from the film sharing the same song title. I know Kenny Rogers well because my dad listens to him over and over in the car. In pretty much the same way, I know the words to Islands in the Stream by heart and I accept and revere it as one of the best, if not THE BEST country-pop duet songs of all time between Kenny and Dolly Parton...as far as country and pop music in the US of A’re concerned, of course. Miley and Shawn Mendez’s cover of it I’d seen recently was alright but nothing still beats the OG one, as always. With music, it’s just, really always the case.

Kenny departing from us March this year was alright. He was well cared for in a hospice and at the right age too, to leave us and this mess of a world behind for the afterlife. Sounds grim but not really. Heh. He died of natural causes so we know he was at peace and accepted then that his time has come. Fans and long-time listeners of his should also be at peace with this knowledge. I don’t consider myself a fan but since he’s been around so much because my dad plays his songs in the car often, I’m the same. I’ve accepted his passing away early this year. He’s lived his life well and given us good music to listen to should we like to remember him and his works and celebrate his life and legacy doing so.

Schlesinger’s case was way worse because, well, COVID 19. And it’s well...I guess we all saw it coming, me included, that I’d just learned, watching the one of many national English news on ANC that ‘pandemic’ is the word of the year according to Merriam-Webster. Timely, huh? Yep. Predictable, really. Sarcasm noted here.

So if someone ever asks what 2020 was about, we only have to say that according to Merriam-Webster, it’s the global (COVID 19) pandemic. Short, not-so-sweet, succinct, and grim. Yep.

This one, Schlesinger’s case, is something I still find difficult to accept. He was only 52 years old! He was at the prime of his life and had some projects still he was working on at the time of his passing so WHY?! I suppose that’s all of us who followed him and his extensive work on tv, film, the stage and his own band, Fountains of Wayne when we heard news he’s passed away due to COVID 19 complications. It’s definitely me now though I learned of it late. Heh.

To cope with the sadness of losing Schlesinger, gone too soon at 52 years old and with an impressive Hollywood tv, stage, film resume to his name since and his own band’s, Fountains of Wayne (FoW) really good discography, by the way, I’ve been listening to FoW’s Welcome Interstate Managers---all of the contents of said album/record---and That Thing You Do’s OST with the Beach Boys’ Sounds of Summer Best of in between. My favorite song on Welcome Interstate Managers is the sarcastic take on real life as an everyday worker in sales, Bright Future in Sales. As much as I like chill sounds where music goes, I like me some music with lyrics jolting us back to grim reality in much the same way I like films (indies, mostly, or lesser known short and full-length ones) that tackle social issues not frequently discussed in public or so but we are aware are there, still plaguing much of today’s society. I live for cynical, satirical, ironic, and even hyperbolic stuff about real life actually. It may be why I’m so entrenched and attached to the era where we all hated ourselves---the 90s. Although one would say much of that sentiment or feeling did carry itself to the 2000s, though. I don’t know about you, but until now, I still hate or have heavy dislike for myself and everything else around me, especially our gov’t or current admin here in the Philippines, and people in general so I don’t think it ever really goes away. And going off tangent again for the nth time today.

Anyway, my 1996 was That Thing You Do on HBO in our household...on and off along with other 90s films like The Craft, Clueless, Jawbreakers (I think this still plays in Cinemax from time to time) so of course losing Schlesinger also was...rather, is hard. He’s done so much and he was supposed to be working on more and he’s left such a deep mark here for us, avid fans of American pop culture...I suppose, even the casual ones. Aside from his That Thing You Do, I’d also seen Josie and the Pussycats at some point. I don’t remember when, where...though I did watch some episodes of the cartoon on Cartoon Network (CN) so of course, I’m pretty sure I’ve seen the film of it as well. He worked on a track or some tracks there, too. 

2020 sucks. COVID 19 sucks. This global pandemic sucks. But at least there’re films, tv shows, music, stage musical plays turned movies (Jonathan Larson’s Tick, Tick...Boom! is coming to us soon with Andrew Garfield in the lead---I’m wary of Garfield being a forgettable actor since The Amazing Spider Man because Dane Dehaan was what made that for me, to be quite honest so I’m not so sure of him being Jon here and as a self-respecting Larson fan since Rent, I’d rather they casted Neil Patrick Harris/NPH since he was in the London stage for this way back anyway...) to keep us entertained and fine until then. What would it take for ‘rona, and I’m not talking about the American Corona beer here that’s really popular in the west coast, to go away? I, like the rest of you in self isolation or quarantine, tend to think so but I don’t think we’ll have any answer to that until the vaccines are well underway by spring next year. Or at least, that’s what health authorities and scientists tell us anyway. I get reminded of it often in the news and I only tune in to that once in a while now because even that, following that daily, breaks my mental faculties down due to stress and pressure and all and I can’t have that when I still have so much, at the back of my mind, to do.

But anyway, time to conclude this one with one of my favorite The Wonders songs, All My Only Dreams just to end on a good note, better than the last paragraph’s ending at least and to remember Schlesinger as well that we’d lost this year along with plenty others we’d met in passing who’ve also left this world especially due to COVID 19 complications. I know we know a lot of those. For me, it’s a distant relative or family member I’d known since young but don’t have particular fluffy bunny feelings for because of some things that happened between the guy and me growing up in the NCR/Caloocan City to be exact. There’s also my good friend and former co-worker’s only remaining parent, her dad and a few more, I’m sure. So I hope 2021 would be better but I doubt it...very much. It’s still looking pretty dim, grim and bleak from here, where I’m currently standing in 2020.

Before we really end though, COVID 19 is definitely not a hoax. It hasn’t been since the first cases started in Wuhan, China. It’s just, only been getting worse and still continue to claim lives and spread to more people even those at home. So as someone who comes from a household of mostly medical workers or health care workers here, we should really be very careful about and around it. Let’s take the necessary health protocols seriously like wearing a mask out and maybe the face shield too and always keeping the sanitizers, alcohols in our bags among others---hygiene and sanitation, disinfection. It may come off really anal of me and I am not anal (I don’t like people with Type A personalities in the first place, lol...I’m just a very cautious Virgo, really, and a Type X---mix of Type C and D personalities) but seriously, SERIOUSLY, I can’t stress this enough, COVID 19, the virus SARS-COV2, that causes it is real. Very real and once it’s in your system, it can go the fatal, deadly way or just the mild and you’ll recover later anyway way. It’s not picking which people should die next and which should not, really. It’s really just there making a mess of things that are already messy since the beginning. My point being, it’s just better if we don’t spread it or are careful enough not to contract it with following health protocols set by health experts, scientists to help us get by this...pandemic. 

Well here’s to 2020 being over soon and 2021 creeping in on us soon enough. 

P.S.

Billie Armstrong of Greenday upped a cover of That Thing You Do as a tribute to Adam and the youtube live of the Wonders coming together again to pay tribute to and celebrate Adam’s life may still be up on the ‘tube. I have yet to see the latter but enjoyed the former. They are just so...sweet and precious. Ugh. Adam Schlesinger, gone too soon indeed. :(

PPS

Another songwriter/contributor in the TTYD OST passed away last year, too. Rick Elias. Cause of death is brain cancer. I had a friend from college, young and so full of life and dreams, who passed away due to the same thing so I’m kind of aware how this goes. Ugh. Cancer sucks. All of these are just so...sad. Depressing, actually.

[penultimateapogee]

hey dude for the music challenge u should do ALL OF EM

heh heh heh... such was my plan ALL ALONG. i will now use this ask as the place to do it (here’s the post btw)

1. A song that reminds you of your childhood: anything from Fiddler On The Roof (the original Broadway cast recording)... my dad loves Fiddler On The Roof and he used to play it all the time

2. A song to sleep to: heh, anything at 2am. but really New York And Back by Leanne & Naara

3. A song that your best friend loves: oh god, really? cmon i cant just know that...! ummmm mazie and i had a really in depth running conversation about her favorite music about two years ago but im forgetting it all. im PRETTY SURE Venus Ambassador by Bryan Scary & the Shredding Tears was the inspiration for her OC Stuart who we both love and occasionally develop

4. A song that hypes you the fuck up: HEH ANYTHING....! oh my god this is a haaaaard one because of how many options i have!!! but also: Awaken by Riot Games feat. Valerie Broussard, because WHEN THE DEVIL IS KNOCKINGGGGGGGGG... SO ALL YOU RESTLESS

5. A song you like to daydream to: i can only say “heh anything” so many times!! literally i daydream to basically every single song; its foundational to how i consume music. i’ll bring out the real heavy hitter now and say Follow You Down by Zedd feat. Bright Lights. ive got some REAL good daydreams for that one

6. A song that’s on at least 3 of your playlists: *breath in* no just kidding, i do my best to make sure my playlists arent too similar. the day you stop me from putting I Wanna Get Better by Bleachers on every character playlist is the day i die tho

7. A song that you love from a genre you don’t usually like: this should be easy; lemme just flip through my catalog of “songs i bought independent of their albums because i was building an 8tracks playlist in iTunes”... actually no, Planetary (GO!) by My Chemical Romance! i dont usually like whatever subgenre of rock MCR is all that much but this one GOES (fittingly shjfdis)

8. A song that you liked when you where 10 that still slaps: Der Kommissar by Falco. no fucking hesitation. i can thank my fluent-in-german mom for this one

9. A song that makes you want to go on an adventure: Zero by Imagine Dragons! ive daydreamed some poppin’ space adventures to that one

10. A song you’d want to dance with your partner to ( or future partner ): so, so much... NOT Jenny by Studio Killers because i just wanna make out to that one; maybe I Go Crazy by Paul Davis

11. A song to stomp around and pout to: difficult, because when i pout, i pout like grimbark jade, in that i go “actually im better than everyone and you can all smd.” then again, having made that clear, Roman Holiday by Nikki Minaj (shoutout: @floralmarsupial for killing me with that lyricstuck)

12. A song to listen to whilst you lie in a meadow: Folding Chair by Regina Spektor. TOO EASY

13. A song that reflects your views on love: uhhhhh. huh. polyam moments? no songs about polyamory moments? being polyamorous fundamentally affects my views on love in a way im not sure ive ever heard a song capture moments? Hot Air Balloon by Owl City because i’ll be out of my mind, and you’ll be out of ideas pretty soon, so let’s spend the afternoon in a cold hot air balloon

14. A song to sing to the sun: i feel like its probably not the intended spirit of this question, but Coming Over (feat. James Hersey) by Dillon Francis & Kygo. im usually more of a nighttime girl but honestly? call me xoxo

15. A song you like that sounds like its on the soundtrack to an indie coming of age film: ohhhh my gooooddddd literally any fucking Bastille song. any of them. thats like their whole angle and i LIVE for it. im picking Snakes because snakes are biting at my heels, the worries that refuse to let us go; ive been kicking them away and hoping not to let them take control

16. A song that you like that romanticises being a teenager: i would love to say Teen Idle by MARINA for the irony but i cant bring myself to. (ill still link it tho.) real answer is Centuries by Fall Out Boy, because whether or not it actually romanticises being a teen i just feel it yknow

17. A song that makes you want to grab your friends jump up and down dancing and screaming the lyrics: why did they write a question to which the only answer is Bohemian Rhapsody by Queen? i dont get it. just kidding another acceptable answer is Toxic by Britney Spears (my white is showing im sure)

18. A song that you like that the lyrics are just so beautiful they’re practically poetry: well actually i have such good taste that every song i listen to is poetry. (trying to remember the lyrics i cried to out of nowhere yesterday. oh right it was The Draw by Bastille but most of it doesnt fit the question as much) ANY Hozier song. im linking his fucking artist page because im NOT KIDDING. ANY HOZIER SONG. i toyed with picking a specific song as an “also, it’s this one haha” but no, im dead serious. i cant pick just one

19. A song that you can imagine listening to in an abandoned church ( if it isn’t hozier im judging you, but whatever ): ironic! to pick a specific Hozier song this time (because op is right, he’s the only choice), Talk

20. A song from the soundtrack of a film that you like so much after the film finished you immediately looked for it: hm, i feel like i have done this before, but i cant recall when... well i didnt go “oh fuck bop [blacks out]” but Immigrant Song by Led Zeppelin. remember Thor: Ragnarok? that was a good movie

21. A song for when the sun has gone down and you are feeling absolutely buck-wild with exhilaration!: Lost In Japan (Remix) by Shawn Mendes & Zedd, because no song hits my city-hotel aesthetic quite like this one does

22. A song that makes you feel like you’re strolling through Ancient Greece living your best life: ancient Greece...! that throws a fun twist in it; Don’t Leave Me (Ne me quitte pas) by Regina Spektor

23. A song that when you listen to it you’re transported to a liminal space, time is pointless and you must sit and wallow in the void that remains: Shots (Broiler Remix) by Imagine Dragons feat. Broiler. i glanced at this question early on and have been sitting on it the whole time. just LISTEN to it

23. A song to listen to on a long drive when you have the really strong urge to keep driving until you find somewhere to start a new life (preferably a europian city whose language you don’t speak): Evelyn by Kim Tillman & Silent Films. it just called to me here

im a little sad that i couldnt put every song ive ever listened to in here so heres some more good ones that i didnt choose: Citrine by Hayley Kiyoko (this is actually a whole EP), Lone Digger by Caravan Palace, Safe And Sound by Capital Cities, Absentee by Jack Campbell, River Flows In You by Yiruma, Instant Crush by Daft Punk, Link by Jim Yosef, Poke Bowl by Radiant Children, Optimistic by cehryl, Quiet by Lights, Superposition by Young the Giant, Far Too Young To Die by Panic! at the Disco, The Good, the Bad and the Dirty also by P!atD, Whatever It Takes by Hollywood Undead, LUNARIA (instrumental) by Chouchou. i know thats easily enough to make your eyes glaze over but mutuals especially it would mean a lot to me if you listened to at least a few of the songs i linked in this post because music means a lot to me and sharing it with other people is one of my favorite things :]

[mxliv-oftheendless]

LOL I am half dead but I'mma send you some bands! Sorry in advance if I pick some you don't know as well. :/ How about: Queen, Bon Jovi, Van Halen, Motley Crue and Aerosmith?

Yay! Thank you! I don’t know much of Bon Jovi or Van Halen, but I’ll try to answer best I can!

Queen: 

Favorite song: It’s a tie between “Fat Bottomed Girls” or “Another One Bites the Dust”

Least favorite song: “I’m in Love With My Car” lmao just kidding. 

Have I ever seen them live: Yes! I saw Queen + Adam Lambert last summer with charasmaticbandgeek and it was amazing!

Favorite band member: … Brian May. But I also have adopted Freddie Mercury as my dad. 

Least favorite band member: I don’t have one. I love them all so much

How many of their albums you have: I have a Greatest Hits album and A Night at the Opera, so two. Or one if we’re not counting greatest hits albums. 

Favorite album: I guess my Greatest Hits album, since all the songs I love are one there lol.

Bon Jovi: 

Favorite song: Oof, another tie. Either “Wanted Dead or Alive” or “It’s My Life” 

Least favorite song: … I only know four songs, and I love them all, so I can’t answer this one heh. 

Have I ever seen them live: I have not. I do remember learning a few years ago they were coming to Detroit, and suggested to my aunt that we should go (my aunt loves Bon Jovi)

Favorite band member: The only one I know of is Jon Bon Jovi. 

Least favorite band member: Once again, the only one I know is Jon Bon Jovi. 

How many of their albums you have: None

Favorite album: I’ll just say Slippery When Wet, since that’s the one that has three of the four songs I know lol. 

Van Halen: 

Favorite song: I only know “Why Can’t This Be Love” and “Jump”, but between those two I’d say I like “Jump” more. 

Least favorite song: So I guess that means “Why Can’t This Be Love” would go here. (Sorry, Van Halen)

Have I ever seen them live: I mean I’m gonna see David Lee Roth when he opens for KISS this September. 

Favorite band member: I only know David Lee Roth and Eddie Van Halen... but I’ll say David Lee Roth. 

Least favorite band member: See above. I mean... I heard Eddie Van Halen’s kind of an asshole, but as I said, I don’t know much about Van Halen. 

How many of their albums you have: None

Favorite album: Don’t have one. 

Motley Crue: 

Favorite song: “Saints of Los Angeles”. That song SLAPS. 

Least favorite song: I mean, whenever my mom hears me listening to “Girls, Girls, Girls” she’ll dramatically shout “Where did I go wrong?!” But I guess that would be my mom’s least favorite song lol. (Btw she doesn’t actually mean that; that’s just us messing around)

Have I ever seen them live: Nope. But now that they’re touring again, that may change... but don’t quote me on that. We’ll see. 

Favorite band member: Mick Mars. He’s a badass on the guitar and a huge mood. I can’t not love him lol. 

Least favorite band member: *sigh* I dunno, man... Unless I know a lot about the members, I can’t accurately discern who’s my least favorite. 

How many of their albums you have: I only have a greatest hits album at the moment, but I plan to download Shout At the Devil in the future. I also have Girls, Girls, Girls as a tape (given to me by my dad for Christmas, at the sight of which Mom just sighed heavily lol)

Favorite album: I mean, I really like the heavy sound on Shout At the Devil. So I guess Shout At the Devil?

Aerosmith: 

Favorite song: DUDE LOOKS LIKE A LADY! Also fun fact: the song “Walk This Way” came to be written after Steven Tyler went to the movies and saw Young Frankenstein (”Walk this way... This way!”). I just have to give a shout-out for that, since Young Frankenstein is my favorite movie ever. 

Least favorite song: I guess... “Dream On”? I dunno, I know a lot of people like that song, but like... I was just never hooked by it. 

Have I ever seen them live: Nope. 

Favorite band member: I mean the only one I know of is Steven Tyler. But he seems like he’d be a cool guy to chill with. 

Least favorite band member: Again, the only one I know of is Steven Tyler. 

How many of their albums you have: None. 

Favorite album: Don’t have one. 

[namstokyo]

50 Questions Tag

Tagged by the ever-radiant @sunshinesmilehobi (I totally didn’t forget to do this heh heh)

1. What takes too much of your time?

Sleep. I either need longer days or my flesh vessel should have fewer needs.

2. What makes your day better?

Music, mostly!

3. What’s the best thing that happened to you today?

I found out the pitbull who had been at our animal shelter for a long time got adopted!!

4. What fictional place would you like to go to?

Anyone ever watch Tron: Legacy? The Grid absolutely blew my mind when that movie came out... the way they integrated light so seamlessly into the environment was stunning. My inner 10 year old is still dying to see something like it in person.

5. Are you good at giving advice?

I think so? I’m honestly pretty good at reading people and the whole problem-solving / psychology dynamic comes naturally to me. Now if I can just figure out how to apply it personally lol.

6. Do you have any mental illness?

Overcoming depression babeyyy *finger guns into my therapist’s office*

7. Have you ever experienced sleep paralysis?

Luckily, no!

8. What musician inspired you the most?

Outside of BTS, who gave me a huge push towards learning to love myself, my top 3 artists are Hayley Kiyoko, NF, and Billie Eilish. 

Hayley’s music actually helped me realize and become comfortable with being queer. Nathan’s songs were there for me during the worst part of my depression. He made me feel understood and less alone. And Billie’s unique lyrical style continues to inspire me whenever I’m in the mood for writing. I’ll never get to say it to their faces but I’m so grateful for you guys.

9. Have you ever fallen in love?

I had a huge dorky crush on this one guy in elementary school that took the longest time to get over,,, idk man,,, I’ve never really gotten butterflies like it since,,,

10. What’s your dream date?

Café date!! Museum date!! Or hiking together!! It depends on my mood.

11. What do others notice about you?

My quirky taste in earrings. Favorite pair so far are big, rainbow, star-shapes made of string. You can’t miss ‘em hsdfghjkl-

12. What is an annoying habit you have?

I suck at asking people for help, no matter how bad I need it.

13. Do you still talk to your first love?

Haha nope, he moved to Alaska ages ago :”)

14. How many ex’s do you have?

015. How many songs are in your playlist?

Like 700? At least.

16. What instruments can you play?

I can shred a sick air guitar if I do say so myself.

17. Who do you have the most pictures of?

My sister and niece <3

18. Where would you like to go before you die?

Barcelona!! Specifically, the places with Gaudi’s architecture.

19. What is your zodiac?

Scorpio, bish.

20. Do you relate to it?

Oh yeah. I’m very determined, observant, and drawn to mystery. Not a serial killer though... promise.

21. What is happiness to you?

Cuddles and warm laundry~

22. Are you going through anything right now?

Oof.

23. What’s the worst decision you’ve ever made?

Giving a second chance to someone who didn’t deserve it.

24. What’s your favourite store?

I’m a slut for Bath & Body Works. Smel gud.

25. What’s your opinion on abortion?

Pro-choice. Your body is none of anyone’s business but yours.

26. Do you keep a bucket list?

No... I have a vague idea of things I’d like to do.

27. Do you have a favourite album?

Citrine by Hayley Kiyoko

28. What do you want for your birthday?

Probably books or journals. I do not have a problem.

29. What are most people’s first impression of you?

I had to ask a friend tbh and their opinion made a lot of sense: I seem closed-off because I need time to warm up to people but, when I stick around, I’m ride-or-die.

30. What age do you seem according to most people?

Mmm usually my age (18) or maybe 1-2 years older.

31. Where do you keep your phone while you’re sleeping?

It rests on the corner of the mattress next to my pillow since I usually keep it on vibrate.

32. what word do you say the most?

So?

33. What’s the oldest age you would date?

Right now, I’ll stick close to my age so it’s not weird. Biggest gap I’d go for in the future is 5 years.

34. What’s the youngest age you would date?

Ick, a year.

35. What job/career do most people say would suit you?

Anything in science or criminal justice (accurate though).

36. What’s your favourite music genre?

Electro pop, alternative, and punk not gonna lie.

37. If you could live in any country in the world, where would it be?

Anywhere I could speak / learn the language really.

38. What is your current favourite song?

Paper Love by Allie X

39. How long have you had this blog for?

October 2018.

40. What are you excited for?

Comeback, for sure. I also look forward to days I work at the animal shelter. Miss my floofs...

41. Are you a better talker or listener?

Listener. Tell me your secrets. No, you cannot know my favorite color, it’s classified.

42. What is the last productive thing you did?

Finished a psych presentation.

43. What do you want for Christmas?

Fucking self-actualization. And candles, I love candles.

44. What class do you get the best grades in?

I’m... a perfectionist...

45. On a scale of 1-10, how are you feeling right now?

It’s a non-zero number, I know that much.

46. What can you see yourself doing in 10 years?  

Being the successful, vodka piña colada aunt who gives morally ambiguous, but overall sound, advice.

47. When did you first get your heartbreak?

Haven’t ayyye.

48. At what age do you want to get married?

Whenever my soulmate wants to propose I guess, clock’s tickin buster.

49. What career did you want to have as a child?

A dentist of all things wtf.

50. What do you crave right now?

Mint chip ice cream (Namjoon is sending a hitman as I type this).

Tagging: @trashybtsqueen @narwhalthesharon and @joons-uwu would love to get to know you guys!