#also take both sets of traits as like surface level most of them are just..him putting on an act

[beuxwhoyouare]

Raised You Better

My son Jasper was a good kid. He was a star soccer player in school and got a scholarship to play in college, so I only saw him on holidays. I missed him so much and looked forward to our quarterly reunions.

Well that was until his most recent visit. He was being so distant and when I finally inquired why he was acting differently, he finally admitted he actually dropped out to pursue being a personal trainer.

I was shocked. He's always been a model child and did all me and my husband expected of him. Maybe it was all our time away working? Maybe I should've been home more instead of being at the lab. It felt like a punch in the gut. I mean sure he knew what he was doing thanks to all his time training for soccer but that's not a way to build a life?

My husband and I did it right. We met in college and supported each other through our advanced degrees and worked our way up in an international pharmaceutical company. Personal training is just so...surface level. He's supposed to be better than us. That's what you want for your children. No no no this is no good. I'll have to set him on the right path.

I knew of a special program at work that was rooted in natural medicine and meditation with a mad science twist. I set up Jasper with the "Sports Nutrition" department at work but it was actually our new experiment. It looked like a TENS muscle stimulator on crack. Several wires shot out of a relatively large dark grey box with a screen and several sliders on one side. I sat connected on the other side of the wall connected with the pads all over the top of my head. All I had to do was wait for Jasper to get hooked up. We sold it to him as a scientific way to curb cravings for sweets and unhealthy things, like an ozempic shot for the brain. In reality, I was told that the machine would take positive attributes from one source and strengthen them in the weaker mind.

I saw the lights flicker and anticipated that he had already been hooked up to the machine. I just laid back and rested while focusing on the importance of getting a quality education. Eventually, I must have dozed off because when I opened my eyes again it was all so groggy. But I was sitting facing the opposite direction. I lifted my arms to wipe my eyes and gasped when I looked down. My boobs were gone and replaced with sizable mounds of muscle escaping a tiny white tank top. My arms and thick thighs now filled with tattoos....no?! This isn't supposed to be how it works

I told the lab techs who I am and that I was actually Meredith. They both looked at each other spooked but judiciously jotting down notes. After answering a few security questions, they agreed to believe that I was indeed not Jasper and it must be an unforseen side effect from the treatment.

That's when they explained the problem....When my body woke up, it also said it was Meredith. Could the experiment have basically overwritten the memory of my son with my own? I felt like I basically killed my own child. Grief swept over me. But then so did a bravado, a confidence, a giddiness? The two lab techs handed me a towel as they shyly avoided looking down at a tent forming in my shorts. Oh I guess the excitement led to a physical response.

In theory I get it as a scientist. I did in fact instill positive traits on my son. Granted, that also erased him seemingly. But also it's a chance at a new life full of new experiences. I'm a man now. And what a man indeed. I walked into the shower facility at the lab. I took off the outfit Jasper donned to the lab, if I was still a woman it'd be called skimpy and slutty. Tiny shorts with underwear built in and a virtually see through tank top. In two swift moves, I had taken everything off. I had seen my son naked as a child but this is different. He looked so much like his father....well I guess I looked so much like MY dad now. His genetics graced me well as I placed one hand on my pecs and another on my new dick. I squeezed both recoiling from the newfound pleasure. This was wrong right? Like I shouldn't be doing this....I felt disgusted with myself. No. This is for the betterment of Jasper's life. I'm going to let go of my past life....I'm Jasper now.

And what a life it will be. Years of playing sport and training, whew. I wasn't going to let him throw it away, I'll let it be a side job, maybe I'll own a business with a bunch of trainers under me but I won't be hustling like that. Not yet. I gotta learn the new me. I used my hands to trace the curves of each new tattoo, then moved on to each muscle. I poked and prodded before squeezing, then I remembered I had business to attend to. I took one hand and gently took hold of the warm fleshy rod under the steamy water pulsing down onto me. I pumped back and forth for a few minutes. Jasper was not sensitive at all...I shoved aside my reservations and gripped myself firmer and began jerking harder and faster. Eventually I introduced my other hand....oh he was girthy in the best way. I mean I am thick in the best ways. Harder and faster, it felt like I was floating outside of myself as my muscles took over almost like autopilot.

The steam radiated off my new musculature when it felt like I saw a flash of light. Shot after shot came out of my new rod. The lab walls had likely never seen a show like this but I was happy to christen them. The autopilot kinky thoughts continued to take over my new mind and body. I squatted down an licked the nearest wall as my cum dripped down. I knew Jasper was queer but I didn't know how he would respond to this kind of kink. I think he was a little freak because there was not one single butterfly in my stomach from this action. I quickly toweled off and headed to my apartment. I figured "Meredith" could find her way home.

The apartment smelled like a young male in college. A musk twirled around sweat and strong cologne. Foreign to me, but familiar to my new body. I couldn't control myself and ripped my clothes off...literally. My strength made it obscenely easy to tear them off in ways they weren't intended to. I wanted to try on all my new clothes. This body made everything look good.

My phone buzzed. It was one of "my" bros asking if I was coming down to the shoot. I played it off like I forgot and asked him to send me the "deets" again.

I threw on the nearest random shirt and bottoms and made my way to the warehouse address given. I guess "I" had agreed to help with the photoshoot to launch "our" new clothing line. A nearby table had Jasper's name on it and I quickly assumed the position taking off all my clothes and putting the skimpy clothing on. I channeled my new swagger as my bros began taking pics.

Oh I think I'm gonna like this. Hopefully I can find a cute twink or something soon. I really wanna put these thighs to work plowing someone's son or two.

[eww-y-tho]

Colin VS Toxic Masculinity and Why Penelope Had to Reveal Herself as LW

I made a previous post with my two cents on why the idea of them both figuring out a solution to LW was an inferior concept to just Penelope figuring it out on her own, but it was small and I want to go more in-depth.

So, in order to grasp ✨my perspective✨ of the story, we first need to talk about Colin's struggles with toxic masculinity and his inferiority complex.

Naturally, Colin is a hopeless romantic with demisexual tendencies and a more prominent softness compared to other male leads. He's a bit dense (I say with love) until he figures out what he wants and how he's going to get it, and then he is a man of frankly ridiculous action. He's a sensitive boi who has a difficult time fitting in with the other men in his life and being taken seriously by his family, as he puts it himself. An empath, lol.

Honestly, Colin being a "rake" was an integral point of his character arc, and if you haven't picked up on that text by now, I would ask where your media literacy is. Violet put it best, he's putting on armour to protect himself from the way that society treats his character, and naturally, he develops a small, albeit persistent inferiority complex because of this. He doesn't feel like he's providing enough to the people around him because of toxic masculine standards.

I honestly think it's been with him since s1, and Pen is the only person who could bring these thoughts to the surface, which is why it comes to a head in s3 p2.

But I'm getting ahead of myself.

In his efforts to fit in, he does some questionable things, such as the 2x8 comment, which he regrets as soon as he realizes how much damage it has done to his relationship with Pen. He hangs around with douchebags that he can't stand because he feels a need to conform and "be the kind of man society expects him to be."

But he also absorbs toxic masculine tendencies in the process. His gut instinct of general envy that a woman, Pen, is more successful than him (I hate to put it that bluntly, but that's how I took it), asking for her to quit LW because of these reasons, completely disregarding Pen's autonomy and her perspective by blindly charging forward to stop Cressida's blackmail, among other smaller things.

It's kind of ✨subtle✨, but I know it's there.

Pair that with his inferiority complex and you have a man who is trying to put down Penelope to his level, if that makes sense. By this point, he's already conquered the idea that he needs to conform by the way he cuts off his toxic friend group, but he isn't completely free from the systemic perspective.

Therefore, the idea that Pen would need him in order to find a solution to her problem confirms that toxic masculine trait. Let's be real, Penelope didn't and doesn't need Colin in order to help with LW's problems. She's managed without him before and will continue to manage it by herself. This is not to say that Penelope doesn't have an issue with accepting help from others and feeling the need to handle her problems alone because of her old situation, but she takes the emotionally intelligent move by LITERALLY voicing what she needs from Colin and their relationship.

She needs his companionship, she needs his love, she needs a rock she can come to at the end of the day and be able to depend on. She does not need him to do anything for LW, as it is a part of her identity and an accomplishment that she is proud of and will not let go of. Colin cannot make the demand that she drop everything she's worked for for him.

And that's how relationships work in the real world. You have things you are willing to let go of, and some things you are not. Your partner has to accept those boundaries you have set or leave the relationship, and you shouldn't have to abandon those things in order to get the person of your dreams, because that would make it a toxic relationship from the start and will most likely end in you losing parts of yourself in your partner.

Anyway, all this is to say that Penelope had to get out of her situation by her own means and with full autonomy on what she wanted to do to finish off her character arc.

And Colin needed to realize that his envy is a baseless emotion that simply has no value compared to the woman he knows her as. A strong, independent woman who doesn't need him to do things for her. He also needed to humble himself and see the way that LW is not competing with him, but a part of her. They both demonstrate that what they need from the relationship is not transactional in nature, but rather a shared bond powered by love.

I understand the idea of wanting them to both find a way out of the blackmail as a team, but again, that's explicitly not what they need from each other, and why I think this perspective is again a misunderstanding of their character arcs.

I think I've articulated this the best way I can, but I do know I wanted to say some other things. I'm tired tho, so yeah, ending it here.

Hopefully, this made sense.

Bai!

[queen0fm0nsterz]

Hey. I knew you're mad at Otto for hurting Noone and Noone deciding to join Nowhere, but have you ever considered hating the Ferryman for being the main reason why all of this started?

Like this man took away Otto's sister, Cici (Sisi? Cece?? or whatever the hell you spell her name as) away from him and making him obsess for answers, then later in Otto's life he met Noone and realize she is going through the same thing his sister did and became insane and thanks to that, Noone distrusts him and became an easy target for the Ferryman to take her away too and making Otto the bait to catch more children.

Blame can be on both sides. In this case, blame definitely is on both sides.

I understand your point of view, and you are right to say that the Ferryman was the one who started all this. But was it right of Otto to push Noone so far into the Nowhere that she "decided" that it'd be better to leave with the Ferryman than to stay with Otto? Who, mind you, deceived her multiple times, repeatedly breached her boundaries over and over again, used her and admitted that he was using her (when he said "I still need her" to the Ferryman taking Noone away) AND who did not show a single ounce of remorse for what he had done?

No. Of course it was not.

The Ferryman is the cause of the trauma. Otto's obsession with him is understandable, frighteningly human. So much so that I find myself disliking him because I have met people like Otto in my life. People who are nice on a surface level only to reveal later on that they capable of being manipulative and cruel, all under the pretense of past trauma causing them to act the way that they do. Trauma is not a justification for one to act like a piece of shit - an explanation, yes, but never a justifier. Which is exactly what Otto does.

You know who else in TSON has trauma and doesn't act like a dickhead? Noone. Noone, the victim in all of this, stuck between a kidnapper who will bring her to her doom and a man who is pushing her into the kidnapper's arms only to cry wolf when she calls him out on it.

I also find myself more upset with Otto rather than the Ferryman for another variety of reasons.

Firstly, I was not expecting anything from the Ferryman. We know how he operates, we know he's not a force of good; he's a liar and a kidnapper, literally a monster, taking children to their doom when they are at their most vulnerable. He was a bad omen from the very beginning and I never expected him to be anything more. Of course I hate him as a person and what he stands for, but considering where he started, I was not surprised to see him do what he did.

But Otto was different. Otto could have been different. He could have been an example of someone who manages to, if not overcoming, at least face their trauma with a positive outcome for both his own sake and Noone's. But no. He let himself go down a road so atrocious that he is now no different from the monsters we see in the Nowhere while not even being there.

Otto is a regular guy. He's not insane and he did not become insane. He, like everyone, has his own set of bad traits. He can be impatient, harsh, dismissive, insistent and immature. At the same time, he also has his good traits: he used to have a morale, kind, understanding, intelligent and friendly. All these things make up him as a person. As he said to Noone: once you are with someone long enough, you let out who you really are. And he did just that. He let his bad traits get the best of him. And as sorry as I feel for his circumstances, I really cannot bring myself to forgive him.

I suppose Otto let us down, like he let down Noone. And the Ferryman is the guy in the white van with its doors open, but Otto is the guy who threw Noone inside and watched it drive away.

He's a wonderfully written villain. My disliking of him as a person does not stop me from really enjoying his character! I do think he's the second best written LN antagonist.

[braceletofteeth]

How about 1, 3, 5, 7, 8 9 & 11 for the ❤️🧡💛bl ask game 💚💙💜 (this might be my sneaky way to get bl recs)

1. Favorite Main Couple

Hira & Kiyoi, from Utsukushii Kare/My Beautiful Man.

For one, I really like these characters, not only for what they are like as a couple, but for them. For their personalities, their thought process, the way they talk and feel about things. That already sets them apart from other couples that I've enjoyed as far as their romance went, but didn't get invested in (both!) the characters themselves—and I noticed there seems to be a correlation between how much I like the characters involved, and how much I care about their romance.

But if we're talking about them as a couple, I think what I like the most about their relationship is the equilibrium. The idea that Hira and Kiyoi are perfectly balanced.

Aaaand I know there is definitely at least one person who have watched the show going “WHAT” right now, but let me explain first 🤚🧐

Hira loves in a way that is very, very specific, and Kiyoi wants to be loved in a certain way that is also very specific. The love that Hira has to give, not everyone can handle; the love that Kiyoi would like to receive, not everyone can give to him. The fact that they meet and somehow find in each other exactly what they craved for?

That's the stuff miracles (and OTPs) are made of.

3. Favorite Main Character

Hey, have I ever told you the story of How I Met My Blorbo? No? Well. Would you believe it. It was actually through a “Most Whipped” poll from the infamous @ bl-bracket.

It was the second round, and he was winning against Kurosawa, from Cherry Magic—someone whose whippedness I was already familiar with, and thought would be pretty hard to beat. I didn't know who this Hira guy was, or what he could have possibly done or be like to be considered more whipped than Kurosawa. So, already intriguing. I went back to check the first round. On that round, he had won by an even larger margin. It was almost ridiculous. Taking a look at the comments left in the reblogs of both rounds, who I got described back to me was a boy who was so whipped it was considered weird and probably unhealthy. Huh! Very intriguing indeed. By then, I was practically sold.

It was only a surface level of interest at first, just because I think Being Whipped is one of the best character traits for someone in a romantic relationship to have; as well as being very intense, and even a little (or a lot) weird about it.

But then, I actually met him and *breathes in* God, there's so much to say about Hira. I fear I'll never get to say it all... but let me summarize to the best of my abilities (I'll try to keep it short).

The Hira that we're first introduced to is a resigned boy who feels inadequate and rejected by his school peers. His response to that unwelcome environment is that he, himself, doesn't wanna be a part of the community—he'd rather keep to himself, or “be invisible”, as he puts it. He finds comfort in his solitude, or at least he tries to.

He has a hobby—photography—but he feels like he just does that for the sake of doing it. There's nothing in particular that he'd like to photograph. He's just going with the flow. All he does in life, it seems, is go with the flow, letting the tides take him forward.

Essentially, he's lacking companionship and a purpose, and that's a very frustrating way to live. When you just lack one or the other, you can still find some fulfillment in what you have. But when you lack both? It gets really hard to think of your life—or yourself—as valuable.

So when he meets Kiyoi Sou, and decides to dedicate his whole being to him—body, mind, and soul? I get it. I really do. Because the acts of service give him purpose, a reason to be, and it also establishes a connection to somebody, even if it's unilateral. It's a chance to be present, but somewhat still at the margins, never the one at the center of attention.

Hira believes he's unworthy of attention. He stays so much in his own head, he can't see his own qualities. And mind you, he has plenty of qualities! For example: Hira is book smart (see: finishes his homework much faster/with less difficulty than the others), strong (see: no less than three people are needed to hold him back when he's defending Kiyoi with his own hands), competent (see: learning how to do all house chores by himself), talented (see: admired by the other members of his uni's Photography Club), and handsome too (see: gif above people who had never met him before commenting on his looks and even hitting on him as soon he takes his hair off his face and dresses in an outfit that complements his body). Well-mannered, loyal, honest to a fault. And cute, in an awkward way. And funny, even when he has no intention to be.

But, of course, he has some flaws too, like... *frowns*... *frown deepens*... It will come to me... *staring at the wall*... Oh. He usually won't communicate how he feels unless someone else prompts him to. Which can be frustrating and cause problems... but that's on everyone else *shrugs*

(I jest like I'm not one of the people who have felt frustrated because of this...)

As much as he might struggle to communicate how he feels verbally, though, usually his face will give him away. Be it showing his displeasure, or his awe. And no one shows awe like Hira Kazunari. Like, I don't know how the actor, Riku, does that, but you can see literal stars in his eyes sometimes. “Oh, you mean heart eyes?” nononono ☝ I've seen heart eyes. That's not it. It's not the look you give a lover—it's the look of someone who travels back in time and watches the universe born.

Which sounds normal, right? No! No, it doesn't! Now you get what I mean about this guy?! How can someone be so passionate about anything? He's so... So. He's so much. He found what he wanted to dedicate his life to, and he never once doubted the conviction he has in its merit. That was it for him. The fucking big bang, over and over, forever. Nothing can compare to that, and his life is fulfilled as long as he gets to keep experiencing it.

... Anyways. He's a fascinating little guy, and a kindred spirit to me. I love watching him discover that he's capable and deserving of being and having much more than he assumes he is—despite his every attempt to deny himself so.

5. Favorite Female Character

So, I already answered this one time, but allow me to take this awesome opportunity to mention two other female characters that haunt me to this day—the sisters from Manner of Death, Janejira and Rungtiwa.

Now, if you're not familiar with them—basically, one is one of the most disgusting people you'll ever have the displeasure of knowing, and the other did nothing wrong in her life and suffered more than Jesus.

Jane, although not being there in person for most of it, is a fundamental piece to the narrative. She's what brings everything together. You could almost say MOD is her story—about discovering what happened to her and why that happened to her; her motivations, and the conclusion to her mission.

Honestly, I don't think I could do half of what Jane had the courage to attempt. Except for Tan and Dr. Bunn, it seemed like the whole world was against her. Powerful, terrifying people, as well as people close to her. People who should have been on her side no matter what, were the ones who hurt her the most. That in itself could break anybody's spirit. But she kept going. When the ones who should have defended her weren't there, she fought back for herself. She said she would do it herself. She would put an end to it herself; finally take back the control of her story.

When I think about all the rage, horror, and hurt that woman must have felt, I just about go mad all over again.

And Rungtiwa. When I talk about Jane's older sister, it might sound like I hate her. And I do. She's the character I hate the most out of every universe. The day she has no more haters, I'm no longer in this world.

But, as it is inevitable, the more you hate somebody, the longer they stay with you. I'll never forget about Rungtiwa, or how deep run her greed. What it led her to do, and to become.

7. Top 5 BL

Utsukushii Kare

A few months ago, I read a list in here, on this very website. Someone had asked for recommendations on High School Japanese BLs, and the kind owner of the blog made a list of their favorites. There were about five of them, it wasn't a long list, but Utsukushii Kare was listed as one of them.

That was very weird.

No, I don't disagree with the author of the post. Utsukushii Kare is good, and should be recommended. There was nothing wrong with that list, technically. But it still felt weird, to see Utsukushii Kare there, among the others. And it was then I realized that, before that moment, I had never, ever, ever thought of this drama as a High School Love Story.

I had never thought of it as a story that had a school as a setting, and it wasn't just because they were only high school students for half of it. I didn't consider Hira's house as the setting either, nor any of the other locations they passed through. Not even the city they lived in. In my head, to call those places the setting of their story was technically correct, but also completely wrong.

“Well, Brace, where did you consider the story was set, then?” Hira & Kiyoi's World, of course?????? What kind of stupid ques-

Listen. Even when they were at school, in many of those scenes, it was just the two of them. When they were outside, too, they were alone together, in most of them. And when not, more often than not, they would be looking at each other, would be thinking of each other. It was like nothing else mattered... more.

This drama helped me give name to my favorite trope of all time, which I now call A World of Two. Well, it's more like a dynamic than a trope, and one day I'd like to talk about it more extensively in a separate post, because there are specific causes and possible collateral effects to it—but it's basically when two people make each other the center of their worlds.

When they come together, it's like they are in a separated space and time from everything. It's a whole world in a single space, that they share together, and it can only exist because of the connection they have. Some kind of mutual understanding or attachment that makes the ones outside of it, strangers, but the two inside, natives; from the same land, the same home.

(In that space, during that time, they feel more like themselves than in any other.)

Never Let Me Go

I struggle to find words to describe or something to compare it to... It's like...

A movie from the 1970's that is set in the 2020's, except the vibes are not futuristic, but of an old play, a tale as old as time. A modern fairytale. A dream that you wake up from and it's like you just came back from an adventure; all your memories of it have a glint to them, the colors in tones you have never seen, your heart longing for another world, the feeling of plenitude. A melody that sounds grand in a ball room, but intimate in your home, when you play it for a loved one. A blend of summer love and 72 years of marriage. Butterflies in your stomach. Heaven on Earth.

The more I talk, the more pretentious I sound (although it's all true). So let me try to keep it simple: I like the classics. I like when people join forces to fight against the world together, overcoming obstacles and the miserable situation they are in. But I also think there should be just as much—actually, even more—joy, love, and hope, in between all that. To show what they could be, what could be theirs, if it wasn't for all The Horrors. I believe that's what makes the most satisfying Happy Endings.

... There's also something about how Palm and Nuengdiao would get lost in each other's eyes. The recognition there—a conversation between their souls, that no one else was privy to.

Strangers From Hell

Still funny that the devil fell in love with him and Yoon Jongwoo tried to convince you he didn't understand why, but he was lying the entire time.

Also my doctor said I can call BL whatever I want, because of the uniquely acute vision I have (he's a dentist).

KinnPorsche

[Little House on the Hill starts playing on the background]

A part of me stayed at that safehouse. It may never find a way out.

... Also. Maybe some people look back now and are able to think KinnPorsche was not that big of a deal, but to me, she still remains That Bitch™.

The cinematography, those locations—they are severed in my brain. Most of the songs from the soundtrack were not made with it in mind, but it was almost like they were. I still listen to many of them. And I can still repeat many of those lines of dialogue from memory—a reflection of how many times I had them repeated to me because of how impactful or iconic they were for us. The storyline was engaging, every week. Both the protagonists and antagonists were entertaining. There were many characters, and they made us remember them all. Even those who were only there briefly. And all three main couples were good—you'd get hurt no matter what your preference was :D

And all the while, great action scenes, plus some other surprises no one had ever seen on television anywhere.

It was the most thrilling experience I've had watching anything, and sometimes I fear I'll never get to feel that again.

Love in the Air

Everyone puts different values on different things. LITA might be a bit rough around the edges, but both Love Storm and Love Sky are comfort zones to me.

Their stories are, at their core, about trust. And you know what? It's easy to make a story about that in which one of the characters doesn't trust easily and the other is this admirable, dependable person... but that's not quite how it goes here.

In LITA, the people (Rain / Prapai) who need to earn another's (Payu / Sky) trust, don't exactly inspire that trust in the beginning. In fact, they do the opposite, and need to work for it, to become a version of themselves that they, too, come to believe that their partners deserve.

Sky's and Payu's trust issues come from past relationships that went wrong, but in very different ways. Sky was in an abusive relationship, and discarded when it was over; Payu was rejected for his personality, his overbearing tendencies. Those experiences led them to not open up their hearts as easily again.

On the other end of this, there are Prapai and Rain, and they are... they are a mess, it's the word. They are so lost, at their respective starting points. But Rain, at least, receives instructions: Payu wants him to succeed, if Payu—the way he is—is what Rain decides is right for him. If he's serious about it. And despite the initial mishaps, it's always clear that they are a perfect match, singing to each other's tune.

There was no such clarity, however, when it came to Prapai and Sky. In fact, when people were first introduced to Prapai, a lot of us thought that he was... inadequate. That he was not right for Sky, and he would not care for him the way Sky deserved.

And then, what happened? We cried. We bawled our eyes out, because of how much he genuinely fucking cared. And some of us (me), I dare say, have never recovered from that.

8. First BL

The first BL drama I've watched was Where Your Eyes Linger, back when it was released in 2020. A friend thought I'd be interested in seeing history being made, so she made us watch together. At the time, I was not into asian dramas yet—the few I watched every now and then were because of my friend.

Rewatching it recently, I realized WYEL has a ship dynamic that I usually enjoy a lot, and some well done emotional scenes—which, for some reason, didn't have an effect on me the first time, because I don't remember the story lingering with me after. Probably because it was short and passed too fast, if I had to guess? But I can appreciate it for what it is more, now.

It took three more BLs till I became a regular watcher—I watched Addicted (stumbling upon it by chance on youtube) and Semantic Error (presented by the aforementioned friend), before watching Manner of Death, a story so dope that it made me fold and search for more BLs on purpose, just in case there were other stories that good out there. It was the first step into a world of possibilities I was previously unaware of, and I have found I quite like it in here.

9. Currently Watching

Takara no Vidro [4/10]

Perfect 10 Liners [2/24]

The Eighth Sense [1/10]

HIStory 3: Trapped [17/20]

Love in the Air: Koi no Yokan [1/10]

I'm using colors to represent how I'm currently feeling about them:

Pink: positive feelings

Blue: neutral feelings

Orange: negative feelings

Right now I don't really have the energy to binge, so it's been a slow catch up with my watchlist. I've been trying to watch BLs from different countries (because this year most have been Thai) and dramas in general of other genres (because most of what I've watched this year was romance). Also more GLs (there is a great diversity of them available right now!). But yes, as for BLs, only the ones listed.

Oh, but I'm also waiting for new episodes of a korean BL animation called Shutline...? Which is more smut than plot, to be completely frank, but I started watching because the main characters are a mechanic and a gang member whose job includes killing people (that might sound familiar 😬). Apparently, “I'm watching because there's a mechanic” is the new “I'm watching because there's a dentist” for me (and only God knows the places that will take me).

11. Most Anticipated Upcoming BL

It might come as a surprise, as I've been very tight-lipped, lowkey, and downright secretive about it... but it's the (alleged) romcom series The Heart Killers.

I just think “approaching a dangerous person with ulterior motives without getting caught” is an intriguing premise, you know? Keeping elaborated secrets is a difficult task, especially when it might cost your life; worse when you lose the plot and get enticed by your own lies, the fantasy you created for someone else, and might end up breaking your own heart in the process.

That's a ride that is bound to be full of ups and downs, and I need to know how high they're gonna take us before the drop, as well as how rough or delicate will be the pick up later.

I'm also just really excited to meet these characters and see how their dynamics will play out. I'm compelled by Bison's longing for freedom; allured by Kant's charms; amused by Style's shamelessness; and, last but not least, possessed by a mighty need to see someone reach inside Fadel's armor and pull at a loose thread until he falls apart.

I just think this one is gonna be fun. :)

(tried to make it sound like the normal kind of excitement, but I don't wanna lie to you, mate... I'm obsessed with this thing. It's been pretty bad. Like, really bad. It's been like that for six months, and it has only gotten worse... Don't try to help me, though!! 😩🖐 At this point, the only antidote is the release of the series...)

—

I don't know how useful this could have been as for recs, since most of the shows I mentioned are no strangers to this blog's page, but... this gave me an opportunity to reflect on them, and I enjoy doing that. So thank you for picking these numbers for me! 😊💛

See you o/

[prongsfish]

sigh

im post blocked

anyway

FISHALICIOUS

WHAT ARE YOUR FAVOURITE EVAN ROSIER HEADCANONS

(ive been asking everyone because he's slowly becoming my favourite)

just now realising you asked this nearly a month ago i'm so sorry i don't know why i struggle with answering asks so much!! but anyways evan headcanons i will GLADLY give. my characterisation of him is less concrete than characters like barty or regulus but i think about him loads still i love him...

this is a classic ofc but i will always see him and pandora as twins!! i love siblings in media so much and i think it allows for suuupper interesting dynamics between them, even in canon

in muggle aus my go-to career for him is either a piercer or something in the medical science field. i can just picture him as this mildly off-putting medsci student who goes on to be a forensic pathologist or something, he's really intrigued by the human body and how it functions in various ways. could definitely also go the way of unlicensed surgeon or mad scientist who performs fucked up experiments on people but that sort of thing doesn't quite fit into every fic lmaoo

i've always thought of him as more of a piercings guy than a tattoo guy (which is the opposite to barty). he'd definitely have both but i associate him more with piercings if that makes sense? i imagine he'd have a labret, bridge, stretched lobes (~7/8"), stretched septum (~0g), eyebrows (normal and middle placements), and high nostrils. all symmetrical!! plus probably some other non-facial piercings

he'd love sci-fi, thriller, and horror (especially psychological) films. anything super tense and probably confusing

when he was a child he and pandora would trap and kill insects. they'd spend ages examining little bug bodies and dissecting them with sticks and stuff... as he grew older he became more and more interested in bigger animals. occasionally he would kill animals himself but more often he'd search for those already dead, especially roadkill. once he was finished with any given specimen he'd carefully remove, clean, and reconstruct their skeletons to give to pandora. she didn't like the organs stuff as much as he did but she loved collecting bones and taxidermy insects, in exchange one year for his birthday (10-14th, maybe) she spent ages searching to buy him a surgical set from an antique store

waaay scarier than barty. if you don't know them you might be more initially scared by barty but while barty is loud and crazy and violent and laughs at pain/danger, evan is creepy. he knows way a million and one ways to kill someone without leaving behind any evidence. he knows every single pressure point on the human body. someone mentions a medicine they've taken their whole life for the first time and when someone else asks what it is he can explain in minute detail exactly how it works to the point where not even the person who takes it knew even half of what he says. he's super quiet moving without even meaning to be so he scares the shit out of people all the time. he doesn't blink as often as he should but just often enough that you don't notice until you're paying attention. and this is all revealed gradually, whereas barty's most "scary" traits are purposefully the most surface level things about him

he loooves medical dramas. he's watched tons of them. he HATES the good doctor though, purely on principle because once someone said that must be his favourite because he's autistic. his actual favourite is house

he runs cold and NEVER wears shorts. lots of beanies and jackets

these were so random and i went on a few tangents but oh well i did like five other things between writing these so it's a bit of a mess LMAO

[gamergirlbonestaskforce141riot]

What do you think TF141 zodiacs are? Plus whoever else you want (could be other OCs!)

- Sincerely, annoying anon

You are not annoying!!

I had to recruit the help of my dearest @eenochian because I know next to nothing about zodiacs (but it's very interesting) and I love her take

Short answer

gaz: september virgo w/ pisces rising

soap: april taurus w/ gemini rising

price: may gemini w/ virgo rising

ghost: capricorn (dec. or jan.) w/ libra rising

Gaz: september virgo w/ pisces rising

so Gaz is 100%, without a doubt, a fellow virgo to me. Virgo men are known for being problem solvers. Good guides, very down to earth, prefers clean and organized environments – both physical and mental. They get along with most people fairly well because they’re very mutable (meaning they can change or adapt as needed), but it’s hard to get past those inner walls, so most of those people are just surface level relationships, with a select few getting that deeper connection. Yet another hard worker and complete workaholic, very rational, calculative yet extremely adaptive, efficient, and very adventurous – basically the perfect problem-solver. Another thing virgo men prioritize is what’s right, and when someone wrongs them, they do not forget. They feel very deeply and have a sharp intuition that lets them see past another person’s deceit, which is yet another reason why they err towards keeping smaller circles and keeping closed off until they trust someone. Extremely helpful, kind, and considerate to those they care about. As for how this pertains to our lovely Gaz: In my opinion (feel free to disagree) he’s probably the most sensitive member of the 141. His intuition and rapid problem-solving skills are insanely advanced, and between his emotions surrounding the interrogation with The Butcher and his family in MW19, Graves and Shepherd’s betrayals, Farah’s story, and how he handles those complicated missions like Piccadilly Circus, Countdown, Recon by Fire, and Highrise… I mean, I could go on for too many messages about why this man screams virgo to me.

As for his rising sign… Libra was a very tempting option due to his strong sense of justice, but I went with pisces because a pisces ascendant usually indicates that a man is very sensitive, compassionate, intuitive, stubborn, adaptable, and on occasion a little too humble to the point of almost being shy. In my opinion, Gaz is a man who dreams so big that he frustrates himself with not being able to reach those unrealistic goals. A bit of the “save the world” mentality with him, y’know. Despite being incredibly talented and adaptable in almost all situations, he has his moments where that frustration over his idealistic goals not playing out leads to him feeling stuck and starting to doubt himself (cough his intro in MW19). He’s very persuasive and communicative, and very skilled in a group that he feels at ease in. He does things the way he wants to do them and struggles with following advice or orders (unless he respects the person and/or agrees with it) because he’s got such a strong intuition. Like I said, very compassionate, and also always eager to help wherever and whenever he can. Very humble and even mysterious at times because he’s on the quieter side, takes a long time to think before coming to any decision, but also has a very imaginative, creative, and social side when in a good environment for it.

Soap:april taurus w/ gemini rising

their #1 most defining trait is their fucking stubbornness. But, that’s not necessarily a bad thing – they’re stubborn bulls (hence the name lmao), but they’re also incredibly persistent and very steadfast! Once they’ve got their mind set on something, there is nothing on this planet that can stop them. Just think about Soap’s backstory and how he joined the SAS; he tried (and failed) for years to lie about his age to get in earlier and, once he did manage to get in, he immediately started setting records and relentlessly pushing to do more. Taurus men are also loyal to a fault. Very strong sense of duty, very reliable, and a hard worker who demands the best of himself and expects everyone around him to put in their best effort. He’s very down-to-earth and likes to plan things out, always trying to make the most rational (and just) decision in any given situation. If that isn’t Johnny “Fucking Military Prodigy” MacTavish, idk what is lol

a gemini ascendent would indicate that he’s very lively and charming, very active (both mentally and physically), extremely intelligent and quick-witted, a great conversationalist snd social expert, very animated, and overall just a very playful and fun personality. Of course, everything comes with its flaws – this would be yet another indicator that he’s somewhat impatient and even has a bit of a shorter attention span. Not because he’s stupid, the short attention span is a result of him simply moving too fast – again, both mentally and physically. He’s very inquisitive and curious about everything around him, so he ends up being super distractible because he’s wanting to look at everything all at once. Another sorta “negative” trait is also the fact that he can be manipulative. I don’t really see this with Soap, but my mom’s also a gemini rising and I don’t see it with her, either. I think it’s more or less what could happen if a gemini ascendent abuses that inherent charm and social skill that they have. Also worth noting that it’s a sign he’s a bit flirty. I don’t think anyone’s shocked by that one. Also known to be adventurous, which does contrast with his sun sign’s innate desire for stability and routine. You’d think that would lead to issues, but in reality, the focus and discipline that comes from his sun sign perfectly melds together with how scattered and flexible he can be, which leads to him being very adaptable (even if it causes stress)! His ascendent also helps alleviate some of that very serious side that comes from his sun sign.

Price: may gemini w/ virgo rising

Now, an important thing to remember about a gemini is that gemini represents a dual nature. It’s the twins of the zodiac. That being said, Price is going to sound a lot like Soap at first. Gemini men are talkative and not usually shy (this can change when you throw in some virgo), but a key point is that they’re very good communicators. They’re very charismatic and excel in any sort of social environment – he’s “the guy that knows a guy” because he’s a very curious person who wants to meet and experience everyone around him. Just think about how many allies Price has and how heavily he prioritizes forming bonds with the people he works with. Leading off of him wanting to experience the people around him – gemini men are notoriously victim to their whims. He will do what he wants to do, without regard for random bullshit like “rules” or “authority” or comments like “that’s a US general you just killed” and “Price you just set off a missile over Washington DC”

He is extremely adaptable (again, dual nature) and restless, and he will get bored with people who can’t keep up with his mind. Constantly tries to surround himself both with people who can teach him new things and people he can teach. Now, it sounds like I’m saying he’s selfish and all about “me, me, me!!” But, he’s really not. Again, dual nature. Gemini men can easily lift a mood because they’re such light and vibrant personalities, turn any bland or dull situation into something better with a joke or a witty comment. Depending on his mood (or the time of day lol), he can be the most charming man in the room or your worst nightmare. A very versatile personality, really.

So, a virgo ascendent can best be summarized in three words: Observant, disciplined, and nurturing. I don’t think anyone will be shocked by Price being called any of those things. Virgo ascendents would be considered pretty classic perfectionists (this is not universal) by a lot of people. And, the description isn’t wholly inaccurate. They’re very detail-oriented and critical, both of their own work and the work of others – the details are what make up the big picture, so every detail will be planned to a T. All t’s crossed and i’s dotted, y’know. He enjoys things being orderly, so he’ll do what he must to keep everything and everyone neatly filed and organized (that being said, I headcanon him as having a messy system of organization lmao). Continuing in the theme of details, he is extremely observant. Like, noticing your breathing pattern is different when you get anxious levels of observation. You think you can hide something from him? Think again. This is part of how he shows his care for people, because virgo is a sign of mutability and shyness – show, don’t tell. Emotional intelligence isn’t as hyped up as the immense levels of practical intelligence he has, but it’s very much present in his day-to-day life. Again, bouncing off the last topic, he’s nurturing. Virgo is the maiden, it’s very caring, gentle, maternal, and sensitive, even though anyone under it will deny these things (again, shyness). It might sound ironic to call Price maternal, but, by god, he is. His observational skills and attention to detail are what allow him to pick up on the subtlest change in anyone he cares about, and he cares about those select people greatly. He doesn’t let just anyone get close to him, his special circle is reserved for those few he can trust. As for the combined effects of these signs… very analytical and critical personality, mainly of himself, but others, too. He’s not a showboat, he’s modest and prefers to let his actions speak for himself. Also… somewhat of a control freak. Not because he’s weird and domineering, but who better to trust than himself? Knowing that he’s in control and he’s determining the circumstances helps him feel secure – it’s a reflex, a natural desire. Very good instincts and intuition. His problem is second-guessing and doubting himself when he just needs to trust his gut. Innate skill in problem-solving that Gaz shares. Now, here’s the kicker: despite being all about practical problem-solving, he uses that sense of humor and caretaking nature as an excuse to distance himself from his own problems. It will require someone else (like a partner or close confidant) to make him confront those, and actually feeling secure enough to open up is a whole other obstacle.

Ghost: capricorn (dec. or jan.) w/ libra rising

his sun sign being capricorn means that, in his thinking and personality, he is a very mature, hardworking individual, with a lot of passion for what he does and determination. strong, wise, very dour and serious, yet there exists a more humorous side that you really only see when he lightens up around people he trusts. he’s a workaholic, very much prioritizes the substance and quality of what he does, and he likes being in control, both personally and professionally. dislikes a lot of change happening, but he’s not as bad as some other signs.

also, specifically in love… very subtle. not big on crazy displays, very loyal, doesn’t enjoy messing around and playing a bunch of games. as for his ascendent/rising sign being libra: i based this purely on his humor and sense of justice. above all, libras of any breed heavily prioritize fairness, equality, order, and doing what’s “right.” they’re on the quieter side, but very vocal and active when it comes to peacemaking matters. for ghost specifically, i was thinking about how there’s that sense of humor, since libras are often considered very charming and have very curious minds, which leads to them wanting to explore and experience new things to gain more life experience

Nikolai:

Now THIS asshole... Gemini? Sure. Sagittarius? Sure. Taurus? Capricorn? Maybe even Leo? Sure, sure, sure… but, no. Gripping Nik like a stress ball This is a Scorpio. TEXTBOOK. Rising sign? Not any of the ones I said before, no, no, no… This bastard’s got an Aries ascendent.

Now, OCs... she is fantastic and I think she nailed them all

Riot’s canonically a virgo, and yeah that makes sense. Open up a zodiac textbook, look at “virgo,” and it’s a picture of her. As for her ascendent… feels like she’d have a classically feminine one. This may sound controversial, but she’s giving scorpio.

So, a Virgo sun and Scorpio ascendent is a… how would I describe it… an intense combination, really. Riot is a perfectionist and very detail-oriented person thanks to her sun sign. Whether it’s work, hobby, interpersonal relationships, etc. etc…. She likes order, she likes feeling in control, she’s practical and meticulous yet has a gentle and nurturing side, and she’s not one to boast. As typical with a Virgo, she’s humble and shy and lets her actions speak for herself. She is reliable, she is observant, she is diligent, and she is the person you can go to for just about anything.

As for the combination, think of her as a perfectionist with a twist. That Scorpio brings in a very intense and passionate nature that you don’t see with the muted Virgo, and she’s got this layer of mystery that makes it all the more rewarding to gain her trust. She’s not just a problem-solver, she is someone who will solve the problem and make sure it never happens again. Any potential issue? Taken care of. Any quirks that need to be worked out? Done. She’s a very reliable person who can be trusted with pretty much anything, even the repulsive tasks (cough the black ops shit cough). It sounds like she’s all seriousness, but she’s not, I swear. Her issue is just that she suppresses her emotions and makes every effort against expressing herself, which leads to anxiety and nerves and soooo much built-up tension. That being said – she does all of this whilst craving someone who understands her. Not just anyone, but someone who wants to understand and unravel those mysteries that her Virgo reticence and Scorpio secrecy demands she keeps locked up tight. When she’s actually feeling at ease and/or with people she likes and trusts, she’s all about making them happy. Creating a good environment, serving them to show her love and care, being that safe space for people to rely on – people feel comfortable around her because she’s got this magnetic personality (Scorpio trait) and this honest, gentle nature that makes her seem very approachable. Overall, she’s simultaneously a mystery and someone who yearns to share. Lots of trust issues, insecurities, and constantly has something rotating in the back of her mind and probably causing her quite a bit of stress. What she needs is to be understood and reassured that her loyalty and sensitivity won’t hurt her. Also, Scorpio ascendent explains why she and Nikolai get along

For Mini ( @sofasoap )… come on, that girl is a taurus in any universe. She’d have gemini rising if she’s Soap’s twin, which does apply pretty damn well to her, but in my (eenochian's) universe where she’s not a twin, I’m getting sagittarius rising from her (it takes one to know one).

As for Petra ( @eenochian ), she’s a cancer. Her rising sign… I never really thought about it before today, but I think she and Price are twinning on the virgo rising. Definitely an earth sign, at least. I just give her too many of my own traits lmao. Now, Zhar… she is my Everest.

I want to say an earth sign for Zhar ( @nrdmssgs ). Virgo, taurus, or capricorn. She’s a practical woman, pretty introverted and reserved in my opinion, but no… no, it’s the demons trying to convince me that she’s an earth sign. an aquarius if I’ve ever seen one. As for her rising sign… Cancer. Petra loves her and trusts her for a reason.

[away-ward]

Headcanon!

One of the things that I like about Emory and Damon's relationship is that Damon did not and could not have much control over her, be it her mind, her heart or her body. Even after roughly knowing each others' pain and burying Natalya's body together, HE was the first one to be somewhat cordial to her (in his own weird way ofc), but Emmy still needed a lot of reassurance, readiness and trust to even be friendly towards Damon. In that hallway scene with Will and Damon, it was clear that she wanted Will, and we saw Damon has somewhat opened up to her and maybe even willing to share his bond with Will (because sex and being sexual were two of the main ways how he bonds with others), but it was Emmy that rejected that bond offer (is there a better term because idk if this makes sense 100%) because even after everything, it was not enough to convince her to trust him or will, or them both. I very much love this implication because when this happens, emmy was never described as rejecting them out of pride anymore, like she did to will in some scenes privately before, but mostly out of unreadiness. Other than that, It could also mean that she probably wasnt willing to settle down through this kind of bond with these two specific people, when there were so many other immaturity, big and little issues as well as miscommunications that were not solved between all of them, so they just cannot dive together (like how Damon, Will and Winter did).

Emory Scott always expected more for and from them and everyone (as she fucking should) and not even the horsemen were exempted from this. Emory is the kind of person that don't do casual relationships, but also don't easily take people into their lives just because she doesnt want to feel alone, and not even after everything, could Damon or Will have anything of her and I like that. Not in the sense where "oh yeah these guys are not going to get everything they wanted", but in the sense where this is the first book in the series where the FMC was actively setting her boundaries and making sure that other MMCs know her expectations from them and that this is not just their world, but it's also hers. So no matter if theyre God, the President, Damon Torrance, Will Grayson or the Horsemen, if they cannot offer her something specific that she can logically respects, needs and wants, they still are not much worth to her life, and dont really bring anything much to her table. Each one of them needs to work for the other's respect, Emory herself included, so they needed to work harder to be better themselves as an individual and as friends or family members, rather than just share a few sad scenes and then have impromptu sex with each other, then POOF, expect everything to be magically solved. This was at least, what I think people like Emory would rationale her actions in that situation. The kind of trust she expected was probably something that should come from a place of sincerety, kindness, care and patience, and not some impatient, cheap and shallow view of each other, especially not when they were all still so young and she was so highly dependent on her abusive brother, and believed that no one could and would want to share her burden with her.

So thats why, I think this might also be one of the traits that Damon might appreciate about Emmy the most (among many others), because he knew he cant just get away with anything with her, but also knew that she wont vilify him wrongly based on rumours and for something that could have justifiable cause for his actions, especially after fact checking with others. Emory could be distrustful to others, but when she trusts someone, she is a very loyal person and she always got many solid reasons to trust them too, not just some surface level kind of trust, and some reasons might even be weird as fuck (usually personal), just because she could put her emotional side and be rational in certain situations like these, even when no one else can seem to understand her reasons. She also understand the difference between wants and needs, personal vendetta and circumstances etc., and when to prioritise which to deal with her situation at hand (interestingly, despite her not always agreeing with her own words and actions), and many other complicated and nuanced isues, so she is usually ahead of others when it comes to thinking maturely and critically. We know by now that Thinking maturely and critically in a very tough situation are not really the best traits shown by the horsemen or some of their wives, at least, not all the time, so this convinces me even more that as much as Emory needs them to safely be innocent, wildly and freely let go, and be whoever she had always wanted to be, they too needed someone like her to ground them back to reality and pop their Thunder-Bay-People bubble, like what Alex said in Nightfall during their first meeting. When you think about this more right, as a family, they all really did balance each other out.

Emory and Damon's relationship is definitely the first relationship that Damon had to work for with someone outside of his friend group, a relationship that he cant always control or indulge in whenever he wants. It had to come from a lot of anticipated mutual respect, and a good amount of approriateness of whats right and whats wrong. If not, he wouldnt have apologised to her about burning the previous gazebo. Building the new gazebo might not just be about emory, but also for will, and him standing up for her in the train might be because he could also understand how lonely it was to not having any allies in hideaway and kill switch + a sense of understanding, trust and loyalty from their similar pain and that Natalya burial. However, Damon by that point, other than wanting the best for Will, which means Emory scott will be their family sooner or later- Damon himslef, had no solid need to apologise to her at all for that gazebo burning, even on the behalf of will. Of course, he was partly guilty, but he didnt have to feel the NEED to apologise, like he didnt feel the need or regret for a lot of his past crimes and faults. But the fact that this was one of the things that he brought up to her, after many things that he did regret and didnt regret, he probably had given it some thought about how that couldve impacted her. He was already mature enough by then to understand the gravity of the gazebo burning, and how they did fucked up a gazebo of an innocent girl, just because their friend was rejected and "abandoned". The gazebo that she studiously work all by herself with no one else's help!

Damon also probably understood the kind of person Emory was and the kind of relationship that she expected all those years ago now, especially after not betraying him about Natalya and Banks, and even telling him that she needs to tell Will about it, because imagine if this was Rika or Kai, they probably wouldve used this as a leverage to fuck with him. After maturing, instead of having the narrative of Emory were always just a prideful person (before the locker scene), he probably understood her personality even clearer now, especially after working with her for years, and see that it was never personal to her, and it was just her setting boundaries out of self-respect, (as she should have). Thats why, i dont think there have to be any other words necessary exchanged between them by the end of Nightfall. I believe, out of the many friendships, theirs is a solid one from the start till the end because a lot of their moments in their relationship came from mutual respect, unexpected kindness, sincerety, and loyalties so they'll just be like those friends who saw different facades of the other from the rest of the world, and will have each others' back in an approriate amount. Not always enabling, but not always judging either, and i think their friendship and partnership, if pd did explore more of it, would be a natural friendship where no matter how long the other took to match their pace in life or weird the circumstances was, they could actually get along with each other even outside of the horsemen, because at the core theyre very similar, but with very different trajectory of life, so for lot of the things that they had to work with, they could agree on a lot of the same values in their work and life.

I might looked into their relationship a bit too much, but it's because i found them so different yet so similar, they're like foils to each other, thats why their friendship could work well. What do you think?

Oooh I like this this kind of talk. And I really think there’s some merit to your HCs!

Damon was definitely making a point in the school scene with Will and Emory, but I never considered the idea that he was offering something to Emory. I had interpreted this scene as a message for Will – a signaling that Damon was accepting their relationship. I mean, I know he wanted Emory to see them, to know what they were about and see what she would do with it - reject or accept them. I still never thought it was for her and not Will. But you might be absolutely right. I mean, you are correct that he bonds with people through sex, so maybe this was him reaching out to her.

I do think that Damon respected Emory regardless of her rejection. When she didn’t give in to his manipulations – either her body or her mind, she showed him what she was made out of, and I’m not sure how often he found people who could resist him that so thoroughly. He hated her for what she did to Will after prison (in his interpretation, things are done to them), but before that he respected her.

I had considered her reasons for rejecting Will in that moment was her not wanting to bring him into her life. I think she was scared and too stubborn to go back on what she had already committed to. Still, there is an argument to be made that she was really scared of what joining them could mean for her. Scared of what it opened her up to and revealed about herself. At the same time, they weren’t good enough for her. She was committed to getting out of Thunder Bay, but Thunder Bay was their playground. They weren’t going to leave, at least not for long. And Will, as he was then, would drag her down and keep her under him, and Damon would have help him.

Everything you said about Emory having standards and boundaries that she demanded be respected is so accurate and I love you for saying it. I absolutely love this:

The kind of trust she expected was probably something that should come from a place of sincerety, kindness, care and patience, and not some impatient, cheap and shallow view of each other, especially not when they were all still so young and she was so highly dependent on her abusive brother, and believed that no one could and would want to share her burden with her.

Couldn’t have said it better myself.

Emory isn’t quite to give her trust, but once she does, she does it completely. So solid.

as much as Emory needs them to safely  be innocent, wildly and freely let go, and be whoever she had always wanted to be, they too needed someone like her to ground them back to reality and pop their Thunder-Bay-People bubble like what Alex said in Nightfall during their first meeting. When you think about this more right, as a family, they all really did balance each other out.

(I had to find the scene you were talking about. Thanks for bringing it out! Love that someone – even though it was Alex – said this to Emory)

And The GAZEBO! Idk if it’s like this for anyone else, but hearing Damon apologize for the gazebo, for not trying harder to stop Will, did so much for me. Going back and reading that scene, with the new information of what Damon and Emory went through, why Damon would want to stop it really…just. I can’t articulate it!

But like… the idea that Damon didn’t want Will to burn it because he knew

Will would regret it.

It would hurt Em, who he didn’t feel deserved to be hurt at that point.

Like, he was really trying to look out for both parties in that case. And the fact that he regretted not trying harder! That he counted that as a failing on his part! Enough to make it up to her and Will by building the gazebo? Because he didn’t make any money on that. That wasn’t a job. He took the little time he had as a new father and starting a company, developing a new skill, found her plans and said i'm going to do this. Because, yeah sure Will would like it went he got back from traveling, but I also struggled with that being Damon’s only motivation. Somewhere along the way, Damon’s feelings for Emory had to have shifted away from “She hurt Will so she will pay” to “She did what she had to” and that means so much to me. One of the first people Damon starts to forgive (?) is Emory.

Okay… look. I have very normal feelings about the gazebo.

And yeah, I agree that him standing up for her on the train was more about him understanding what it’s like to be Public Enemy number 1 to these people and to also know… they’ve forgiven worse things. He’d done far worse things to them that Emory ever could, so maybe dial it back, guys?

But going back to what I said before, for most of the books, the main problem seems to be that these boys interpret things as happening to them, and not a result of their actions or a series of decisions or because bad things happen sometimes and there’s no one to blame (I mean, they are also right -- Evans' was something that happened to them, but that's the beside the point. Not everything is a conspiracy to hurt them). For Damon to be the one that learned that lesson first, and having to remind Kai and Michael that what happened with Emory wasn’t about Will or them in general, is big. He was essentially saying they're only mad because they view themselves as the heros, when in reality, he knew that they were just by-standers in Emory’s story.

Another thing I didn’t doubt was the bond between Damon and Emory at the end of NF (it’s only now that I’m realizing I didn’t even thing to put them on the poll. I’m sorry. They deserve the attention.). It’s obvious from the scenes they share they’re going to have something special, different from what they share with the others. At the same time, Damon being the favorite means he’s going to have a special and unique relationship with all of the characters. It’s unavoidable.

But I specifically love their bond.

I believe, out of the many friendships, theirs is a solid one from the start till the end because a lot of their moments in their relationship came from mutual respect, unexpected kindness, sincerety, and loyalties so they'll just be like those friends who saw different facades of the other from the rest of the world, and will have each others' back in an approriate amount. Not always enabling, but not always judging either

Yeah exactly. I don’t believe there’s any room for judgement between them. There’s too much understanding and insight and kindness and respect for them to judge the other. To even want to. They are very similar people.

New thought: if Will is Alex’s reflection, is Damon Emory’s??

I come alive for this kind of discussion. I don’t think you’re looking into their relationship too much. I think of all the friendships in the group, Damon and Emory’s has the most to inspect and analyze. There’s so many layers to the way they interact with each other, between their shared background, their bonds with Will, they’re approach to the world. But they’re also different enough to hold each other to a higher standard, which we need from friends.

Like you said earlier in your comment, Emory expected more from them, and that included Damon. But no one expected anything good from Damon, and he played into that. Sort of like “you think I’m bad, but I can be so much worse” almost? And here Emory comes, not accepting it, not playing into it. It leaves him with nothing to hide behind, and forces him to reveal a little of himself.

There’s so much here to look at and dig into, and I know I’m not skilled enough to be right about everything (or most things), but there’s also so many directions to take this in that make it fun.

All I can say is, Damon and Emory ftw

[soukouku]

CHARACTER STUDY SHEET.

BOLD all that applies to your muse. Italic what sometimes applies.

EYES  : blue | green | brown | hazel | gray | gray-blue | other HAIR  : blond | sandy | brown | black | auburn | ginger | grey | white | multi-color | other BODY-TYPE  :  skinny | slender | slim | built | curvy | athletic | average | muscular | pudgy | overweight SKIN  :  pale | light | fair | freckled | tan | olive | medium | dark | discolored | other GENDER  :  male | female | trans | cis | agender | demigender | genderfluid | other | doesn’t like labels SEXUALITY  : heterosexual | homosexual | bisexual | pansexual | asexual | demisexual | other | unsure | doesn’t like labels ROMANTIC ORIENTATION  :  homoromantic | heteromantic | biromantic | panromantic | aromantic | demiromantic | unsure | doesn’t like labels SPECIES  : human | undead | shapeshifter | demon | angel | witch | ghost | incubus / succubus | werewolf | alien | mutant | android | other EDUCATION  :  high school | college | university | master’s degree | PhD | entirely self taught | ged | other I’VE BEEN  :  in love | hurt | ill | mentally abused | bullied | physically abused | tortured | brainwashed | shot POSITIVE TRAITS :  affectionate | adventurous | athletic | brave | careful | charming | confident | creative | cunning | determined | forgiving | generous | honest | humorous | intelligent | loyal | modest | patient | selfless | polite | down-to-earth | diligent | romantic | moral | fun-loving | charismatic | calm NEGATIVE TRAITS  :  aggressive | bossy | cynical | envious | shy | fearful | greedy | gullible | jealous | impatient | impulsive | cocky | reckless | insecure | irresponsible | mistrustful | paranoid | possessive | sarcastic | self-conscious | selfish | swears | unstable | clumsy | rebellious | emotional | vengeful | anxious | self-sabotaging | self-sacrificing | moody | peevish | angry | pessimistic | slacker | thick skinned | overly dramatic | argumentative | dangerous | prideful | gluttonous LIVING SITUATION  :  lives alone | lives with parents or guardian | lives with significant other | lives with friends | drifter | homeless | lives with children | verse dependent PARENTS / GUARDIAN  : mother | father | adoptive | aunt | uncle | foster | grandmother | grandfather | other SIBLING(S)  : sister | brother | none | other | biological | adopted RELATIONSHIP :  single | crushing | dating | engaged | married | separated | it’s complicated | verse dependent THINGS I’VE DONE BEFORE  :  had alcohol | smoked | stolen | done drugs | self-harmed | starved | had sex | had a threesome | had a one-night stand | gotten into a fist fight | gone to a hospital | gone to jail | used a fake ID | played hooky | gone to a rave | killed someone | had someone try to kill them

tagged by : @kyberborne libby my love <3 tagging : @saebyks​, @finngn​, @quismet​, @recalcytrant​, @vojnaiimir​, @feralspent​, @sewnloved​, @vampdoctored​, @juraiku​, and you !!

[theveryworstthing]

So over on patreon Trevor asked for my take on the Addams Family and I grew up LOVING the Addams family movies so here we are. Instead of doing a straight up style interpretation, I decided to do a full on design challenge, using the characters as bases to make a black southern gothic Addams au. I actually drew the kids first, using the character bases of Wednesday and Pugsley to create some delightful kiddos I'm calling Sunday and Blanche. I of course then redesigned Gomez and Morticia into Carlisle and Mortesha.

The Addams have a very specific high aristocratic goth aesthetic (they've got a butler and nobody really works among other things) so in this re-imagining I wanted to go with vibes that run a little more middle class/upper middle class.  I thought it would be interesting to think about what would be considered weird and off-putting in an entirely different culture, and how being a big ol' goth is way less controversial than it used to be.

I tried to keep this short (HAHAHAHAHAHA) so I didn't spin off into an essay about villain coded families, black people in the horror genre, and normalcy as it pertains to social survival, but just...bits of that are in these designs and lore. Keep that in mind.

Also I made the kids twins because they've flip flopped in age so much in different media and also twins run in my family (i'm the daughter of one). And let's face it, I'm pulling a lot of their southern gothic traits from living as a southern goth so *shrug*.

10 thousand pounds of lore incoming loooooooooool.

The Parents

From the moment he saw her he knew that there was a 50/50 chance of him either never making it out of that swamp alive or marrying the figure that was creeping out from under the distant willow tree in a black cocktail dress. The third time she found him trussed up in one of her traps, he complimented her rope work and asked if she'd like to go out sometime after his head wound stopped bleeding.

Or while it was still bleeding.

If she was into that.

Some kids and a mysteriously burnt down Piggly Wiggly later, their love is still as strong and inescapable as a bear trap in a sink hole.

Carlisle Guillermo (now Addams through marriage but I wanted to give him two first names for a name since Gomez has two last names) makes a vaguely described living practicing ‘law’ around town. A loophole king, people come to him from miles around with contracts signed in blood, fights over chunks of hair buried in their rivals’ yard, dehydrated primate hands, memories that seemed like dreams until the evidence of their happenings became too real, and other regular Legal Items asking for counsel which he is all too happy to give. For a price. Sometimes that price is a homemade pie and sometimes it’s a million dollars, depends on who you are. Whatever you’re asked to pay it’s worth that price, and if you try to scam him out of work or he just plain doesn’t like you? Well. He knows how to twist a contract better than anything at the crossroads.

And he always gets his due.

He doesn’t just serve the local (living)humans though, there are many things that need proper legal representation in this day and age. You wouldn’t believe how many city councils try to build on sacred burial grounds even after he lets them know that his ghostly clients are totally gonna haunt the FUCK out of the ensuing shitty condos and curse their families for all eternity. At least 50% of his energy goes towards dealing with real estate bullshit.

Carl is an excitable and good natured(?) man who loves his family, cigars, dancing, and his many knife-based hobbies. People find him very charming once they get past the feeling that they’re talking to a sultry gator badly disguising itself as a human. I didn’t put a ton of deep thought into designing him, mostly I wanted to make a middle aged dude who looked like he would have been voted ‘most likely to smooch the literal devil’ in high school. Tbh he probably has, but no demonic ex’s can compare to his lovely wife~

Mortesha Addams(her name was already perfect so I just tweaked it)is a woman of many talents. A self proclaimed homemaker, she prides herself on a greenhouse full of Concerning Foliage, a beautiful wasp apiary, and a coop full of what are probably chickens that she keeps for what are probably eggs. She’s also an avid creator of the outsider art that can be seen around the estate. She has taken on the family business of selling her homemade goods in a little stall by the road just outside the swamp with her mom, and makes pretty good money doing so. A surprising amount of poison gets bought in quaint southern towns.

Speaking of poison, people who come out to the edge of the swamp to buy it are usually carrying a lot of secrets around, and Mortesha knows most of them. It’s not like she pries the truth out of people, it just so happens that many nervous hellos eventually turn into the tragic backstory power hour if she’s alone with a client for long enough. She supposes that’s just how people are. Despite the fact that the Addams are very active in the community (whether the community likes it or not) she especially, as a direct descendant of the first Addams matriarch, is seen as…Well not an outsider because the community feels A Certain Way about outsiders and despite it all the Addams are their people, but maybe something like an exception. They feel like whatever weirdness they’re hiding can’t be weirder than any given Addams, so they get a little loose with their words.

This is amusing to her, since Addams’ don’t naturally keep the kind dramatic secrets that their surface level prim and proper neighbors do. It’s much more fun to openly talk about those things.

Do they have a sadly decrepit yet terrifying grandma up in the attic? Yeah, like three. They got a tv, all the creepy porcelain dolls they could want, and they’re close to family. Where do you keep your gram-grams?

Any bodies buried on the property? Yeah some, but most are thrown to the gators.

Any creeping through the balmy summer night with ill intentions? Yeah dude, everyone loves a nice family stroll.

What about dangerous forbidden love? If an adult Addams isn’t incorporeal then they’re either queer or in a torrid romance with some person/thing mysteriously drawn to that awful swamp. Sometimes both at the same time. Most times actually.

Mortesha would know.

The current head of the Addams family is just as outgoing as her husband but a lot quieter and harder to read. She never really seems to get mad about much and always has a genteel smile for everyone whether they deserve it or not. A seven foot tall human shaped “Oh, bless your heart”. A perfectly composed Lady even when she’s, oh I dunno, burning down a Piggly Wiggly. You know. A regular southern mom. Chat her up at the hair salon for 50% off a jar of wasp honey with your next purchase of a mysterious but foreboding packet of herbs.

Designing her was pretty easy because I just drew a lankier Grace Jones and called it a day. I had some problems with her outfit simply because if we were going HARD southern gothic then she’d probably be wearing a white/cream dress with a fuller skirt but I thought keeping the silhouette and the black was more important. She’s supposed to be an anti southern gothic southern gothic character anyway. A woman who looks like she has a million secrets who is actually the most open person you could meet. For better or worse. The red hair came from a coloring error that I really ended up liking (my mom had red hair her whole childhood that only darkened up in high school so I can buy that an Addams can be naturally fire engine red) and the veil was to get more of that classic Morticia silhouette in there.

The Children

Sunday and Blanche are the twin children of Carlisle and Mortesha Addams. Some say the Addams clan got their cursed homestead when a wealthy local businessman made a deal with the devil and lost, leaving his grand mansion to his least favorite maid and cutting his losses once he realized that the swamp would do everything it could to drag the house into the water and take what was owed with its horrible curse. Others say that the family has just always squatted there and no one really cares because man, fuck that particular swamp. Have you been in there? Absolute horror show.

Anyway.

Blanche is the more outgoing sibling and quite the engineer/mad scientist in the making. He started going grey at 2 weeks old but considering he was also rocking some extra fingers, toes, and a tiny tail (he takes after his dad), his parents just put it on the 'not life threatening' pile and decided not to worry about it. He's the kind of smart that teachers find utterly infuriating, less a dog eagerly learning and obeying commands and more a hyena who keeps teaching itself how to pick locks. He has a few friends in his school's robotics club (which they honestly allowed him to make so the school could contain his... creations) but mostly hangs out with his sister exploring the swamp. They find all sorts of neat things in there! wedding rings, suspiciously lumpy garbage bags, cloaked cultists who can't read private property signs, it's an adventure every day!

Blanche is all about experimentation with his creations, his look, and his tether to this mortal coil. Is lipstick a cool thing to try? Let's find out. Can he get out of a strait jacket fast enough after being pushed into the depths of the swamp by his sister? let's find out. He's not dead yet and confused local doctors can attest to the fact that he's rarely attained more than a bad bruise so he's pretty set on continuing to kiss rattlesnakes on their cute little heads and have his sister practice her knife throwing at him until that fact changes.

Blanche is very much a country goth. Cowboy boots (customized by his mom), knife, and lighter are daily accessories. He likes to wear the crusty swamp jewelry they find (the rust adds a splash of color!) and despite appearances he does try to keep himself neat. He's just got  natural Grunge Colors and a tendency to wear clothes he likes until they fall apart. Pugsley always seemed the most modernly styled to me (which might just be because little boys clothes have been the same for a long time) so I wanted Blanche to be the most purposely fashionable Addams. Everyone else is goth by nature, but he's the only one truly familiar with goth as an alternative fashion.

I got really into designing Blanche because honestly, I find Pugsley to be the most boring member of the family. And he was hard to design! I had to mess with his vibe a lot to get him looking how I wanted. I know he's supposed to evoke an " 'evil' little boy next door who's parents never reign him in", but that's just goth Dennis The Menace.  I's 2020. We can at least go queer goth Calvin.

Sunday was much easier to design. Wednesday was my favorite as a child (of course) and I really wanted to keep the spirit of her look while adding things like billowy sleeves (it gets HOT down here), big poofy twists instead of braids, and a nice tie. She's a professional after all, been running the local pet cemetery since she was 6 and the previous groundskeeper met with an unfortunate accident after telling her that tarantulas don't have souls. Her specialty is creating beautiful naturalistic animal funerals similar to those that Maquenda (https://linktr.ee/artofmaquenda) makes, and she takes pride in creating miniature dioramas of her subjects after each burial which she uses as a kind of 3D catalog for future clients.

She really wants to try out her skills on humans one day. Well. Publicly try out her skills. Lotta random bodies float into the swamp. None of them have turned down her requests for diorama models so far. Most seem downright flattered. Plus, she usually figures out which graveyard/crime scene they floated over from and gets her parents to give them a lift back. She'll even help enact terrifying revenge from beyond the grave on whoever put them there if she's not, y'know, busy.

Besides arts, crafts, and pet based funerary arrangements, Sunday is an avid lover of archery (any ranged weapon really), books where little fantasy adventure animals die dramatic deaths, and history. She is That Kid who eagerly raises her hand when asked who Christopher Columbus was and ends up being sent out of class after 15 minutes for making 'a scene'. Her favorite party trick is just picking an item in the room and talking about how it relates to either some obscure historical figure with a buck wild life or a horrible disaster. At least one charity pancake breakfast ended with children in tears after her vivid description of the Great Molasses Flood of 1919.

Social-wise, while Wednesday is the girl that people ask to smile because they think she'd, "look so pretty", Sunday is rarely asked anything at all. People just kind of assume from her quiet nature (in between horrible history facts) that she's angry all the time and that she hates everyone. This is untrue. She hates some people but she's ambivalent to most everyone else and even downright friendly if you bother to talk to her like a person instead of a terrifying cryptid. Like, she IS a terrifying cryptid but she's also a little girl.  

That’s about it for now. One day I might do the other family members but for now I’m happy with the four I’ve redesigned. Making an au! Lurch in a family that doesn’t do butlers could be interesting. Over on patreon I put forth that he could just be Motesha’s mute little brother (similar bone structure) but Amy Crook had the nice idea of quote: “ a mysterious "cousin" that "helps around the house" whose origins are both long in the past and faintly unsettling. He's good for lifting heavy things, like that tank of propane you're about to throw into the burning Piggly Wiggly... “ which i now consider canon. Who's kid is he? How old is he? Not important. Anyone willing to commit arson with you is family.

Annnnyway.  This challenge was a lot of fun! I love indulging in AU’s.

[slug-cube]

Hey! I saw your post just now about Deku's kindness and the fandom's reaction to it. I think most of that started when the fandom was new, and Deku's scarier side hadn't been well established yet. While it is frustrating, many people assume kind and gentle hearted people to be weak. So to me, that was somewhat expected. In general, Deku's...an oddly hard person to characterize. Dekusleftsock stated it better, but he tends to isolate himself from others and represses the most extreme sides of himself. He also rarely verbalizes his personal opinions on things, leaving people to infer his character from his actions. This is a reading skill many people lack, hence why he gets mischaracterized as weak quite a lot. In general, I think people see weakness in both Deku and Bakugo that don't actually exist. Like you said, kindness and emotionality isn't a weakness. When it comes to Bakugo, a lot of people pay attention to all the pain he goes through, but don't pay attention to his narrative arc's focus and the circumstances. They just assume that he is weak or is getting used like a punching bag by the author, missing the fact that all the circumstances that happened to him were largely due to him standing out from the crowd. Sorry to go on a tangent like this, but I feel like a lot of people assume weakness with these two where it doesn't exist. The kidnapping happened due to the league's need to recruit, if it wasn't Bakugo it probably would've been another poor sucker. All Might's fall was going to happen no matter what, he even said so. It might have been bad timing but that was pretty much inevitable, so not really Bakugo's fault. Bakugo made the choice to save Izuku. Bakugo's recent death happened due to becoming too powerful and promptly drawing afo's undivided attention for far too long until he gave out due to that and his still awakening quirk. With Deku, he hasn't been forced into these situations because he has the vestiges to help him when he does. He even stated himself that ofa is an unfair quirk. It assimilates people and quirks into it, using that to increase survival chances. Afo's even insulted at the idea of any normal person being capable of keeping up with either of them, since their quirks are so ridiculously souped up. Each time Deku would've suffered similar consequences to Bakugo, the vestiges bail him out of trouble. I think it's mostly that people see things that on the surface level, they assume is weakness, instead of actually paying attention to what is happening within that scene or what traits that character also has. I try to give people the benefit of the doubt, but it seems like mha uses subtext, actions and symbolism a lot...which tends to go over people's heads, in my experience.

thank you for going on a much deeper tangant on this, because i felt like my post is lacking in explainations that i cant really formulate, but i agree whole heartedly.

my post is more of the general harm of thinking in that way, more than so to due with izuku as a character analyst post.

I want to be clear that I dont mind people creating works of izuku being soft, because i enjoy the characters just hanging out. what I was saying, the generaliazation of it anyway, was that a certain lens to seeing a character a set way gets harmful to a point. thats what i wanted to bring to light, and the fact people do misconstrue izuku's character as well if only a bit. but i do appreciate this addition, youre right that people see weakness where they shouldnt. Thank you for taking your time on this, because it also helped me see things better.

[praisetheaxolotl]

Hey, I just recently saw your blog and i love it! My question is, how do you think Bill's personality would be of he were human? I'm writing a fic about that and wanted to hear your input if you could.

Hi!! I'm glad you like my blog!

As for a human Bill, I actually have an OC who's pretty much just an expy of Bill haha- he's the main character of a podcast I co-host! But nevermind that, it's on hiatus anyway and going thru a reboot....

Anyway! Bill as a human!

He'd definitely be... weird. In a highschool setting, he'd be the weird kid that inexplicably has a fair amount of friends that follow him around, but he'd also be the kid deemed most likely to shoot up the place. Wether or not that assumption is accurate comes down to personal characterization- but that would be what people think, I think.

Bill in canon doesn't seem to have much empathy and tends to see other people as more means to an end rather than actual companions (see: the henchmaniacs.) He'd enjoy their company but on a surface level. And a human Bill would absolutely keep those traits- he'd struggle with empathy and respecting people as people. But that doesn't make him a bad person on its own- its how he responds to it. Is he the protagonist of your fic, or the antagonist? If he's the protagonist, part of his arc could include figuring out cognitive empathy and getting closer to people on a more personal level.

(I also suggest looking up the different types of empathy- someone can have very very low emotional empathy (the kind where you feel how people feel) but learn cognitive empathy (empathising via hashing out how people feel, rather than it coming naturally.) I have very low emotional empathy, but over the years I got very good at cognitive empathy!)

A human Bill would definitely be masking some kind of unhappiness, even a depression, with his strange behavior and manipulative tendencies. How deep the depression goes is up to you ^^ But I think his grandioseness and sort of "bad" tendencies aren't a farce- just because he's depressed, doesn't mean he's actually super caring and a softie deep down. He is depressed, he is unhappy, he's chronically bored... and therefore he sees people as a means to an end, as entertainment factor, and doesn't get any closer than that.

This is just me, but since he's a human he can have menchal illnesses, and I'd peg him as a comorbidity of ASPD and NPD. It's a combination that sucks major ass for everyone, including the poor sod with it. The blog "your-aspd-dad" has a lot of info on cluster B stuff, but I beg of you please please please PLEASE DO NOT canonize this in your fic unless you really know what you're doing. You can learn from the info on that blog but pleasepleaseplease don't say he has it unless you're absolutely sure you know what you're doing. Both these disorders have a lot of stigma attached to them, to the point a mangled portrayal of them could be disasterous. I do welcome any more questions if you have them, though! My DMs are always open, even if I take a while to reply :)

But those are kind of my thoughts, yeah! Outgoing, loud, weird guy, that sees his friends as less "lifelong deep companions" and more "fun people that make me feel good because they like me and are entertaining," who prods people to get a reaction, and all of this behavior is because of deep seeded insecurity (about what? You decide!) and chronic boredom leading to depression that may be mild, OR it could be severe.

Also he's almost definitely set shit on fire. The man has a criminal record, probably assault/battery charges and some acts of arson.

Anyway have fun with your fic!! Drop a link or @ me in a post about it if you want, and I'll check it out!

[syn0vial]

Hello Wise One! I was actually hoping if you can give me some solid personality pointers on Jango, rather than Boba, Fett?

sure thing! full disclosure that my knowledge of jango is not as extensive as my knowledge of boba, but i’ll do my best with what i have! here are some personality traits of jango’s i’ve observed:

paranoid/protective: this is a big one if you ask me. jango endured a life of betrayal and loss before he became a bounty hunter and it shows. besides boba, he doesn’t trust anyone fully, not even those closest to him and is always ready to cut ties at the drop of a hat—lethally, if necessary. his mistrust of the rest of the galaxy is so potent that when he takes boba on missions to populated areas, he instructs him to hide even from normal foot traffic and becomes anxious when he learns that others may have spotted him. it becomes pretty evident that part of the reason boba was so isolated growing up was that jango didn’t trust the vast majority of the galaxy enough to let them near the kid. and when other bounty hunters find out about him? ho boy. jango actually convinces them that he killed boba using a cloned child’s body, bc he’d rather be known as the worst kind of monster rather than make boba a target. there’s also the fact that, after their apartment on kamino gets found out by obi-wan, jango is packed and ready to leave in minutes. not only is he ready to bug out at the first sign of danger, but he’s well-prepared to do so at a moment’s notice.

a loving father: another big one. for those who look at a man as battle-hardened and stoic as jango fett and wonder whether boba got enough affection as a kid, worry not: in the vast majority of depictions, jango is a very loving father, especially when he’s out of the prying eyes of clients and colleagues. he hugs boba, tells him he loves him, joins him in playing with toy starfighters, and tries to make time for him as much as he can. he even does his dadly duty of going fishing with his son (though he and boba practice spearfishing rather than using a rod and tackle). there’s also a wistful little scene where, trying to help boba feel better after zam’s death, he takes him to kamino’s main spaceport and lets him infodump about all the ships he sees there :,) so overall, he has a lot of good qualities as a dad

controlling: and the other side of the coin! while jango is a genuinely loving father, he’s not at all the type to encourage his son’s independent development. self-sufficiency? sure. interests in anything other than the path jango has laid out for him? not really. he actively discourages boba from learning about “unimportant” topics from books, an apparently very broad category given it includes things such as schools, moms, and other children. he drills into boba’s head that he’s going to be a bounty hunter and that he needs to abide by a code with such healthy guidelines like, “don’t have friends or attachments” and “trust no one but use everyone.” boba, of course, goes with it bc he loves his father and wants to live up to his expectations, but he never really gets a choice in the matter. honestly, i think this side of jango is best summed up by him leaving a post-humous note for boba that says, among other things, “i am more than a parent to you.” it kind of goes along with how, after jango’s death, boba continued to think of his father not just with love and grief, but also an almost religious dread of failing his expectations. jango undoubtedly loved his son but he also seems to have defined a very narrow path for him to walk, without room for deviation.

possesses an actual charisma score: okay, now for a more fun one: jango has a charisma score and he apparently makes a habit of using it, to the point where his old friend rozatta pokes fun at him for it (he compliments her and she’s like “oh, you’re flattering me? must mean you want something!”) he also pulls the same thing on zam, calling her charming to get her to agree to help him break into a target’s stronghold. so yeah, jango fett turning up the charm to get people to help him/give him info? 100% canon, baby

very fun friendship with zam wesell: look, this isn’t a personality trait, but it’s important to me. these two are just so fucking funny together. like, on the surface, it’s just a fun dynamic of zam making flirty banter and jokes while jango pretends to be annoyed and drag her, much to her delight. but then on a professional level, you have these two ammoral assholes bouncing wildly between being one another’s Sexy Rival and being one another’s Unhinged Partner but whoops, jango went and had a kid, so now they’re Unhinged But Mostly Responsible Co-Parents. one of my favorite scenes is when, in an attempt to intimidate a prisoner into talking, zam impersonates a politician and lets jango pretend to “kill” her in front of him. for some reason, even after they’re done, jango continues to bridal carry zam’s “body” into the cockpit of slave I, at which point, she perks up, bats her eyelashes at him, and goes, “you’d never really kill me would you, jango?” jango quite honestly replies, “only if i had to.” there’s a beat and then zam’s like, “....you’re so sweet! 😘” honestly, they’re so stupid, i love them

ascetic: much like his son, jango doesn’t seem to have much interest in luxury or “the finer things.” despite having enough money to live very comfortably, his apartment on kamino is described as “spartan” in design and furnishing. this may have something to do with the first bullet point, given that a simple life is easier to pack up and take with you at a moment’s notice, but i do think there’s some amount of preference in this lifestyle, given it’s what both fetts seem most comfortable with in all circumstances.

traumatized: i mean, he’s a fett, ain’t he? particularly, just like boba after him, jango is traumatized by the loss of his family, especially his own father figure, jaster mereel. much like boba, jango seems haunted by the need to live up to jaster’s name and legacy. for background, jaster was betrayed and killed in an ambush by the leader of deathwatch, after which he passed on the title of mand’alor to jango. however, some time after this, the true mandalorians led by jango were wiped out by a combination of death watch and the jedi, with jango himself being stripped of his armor and sold as a slave. after this point, jango does not seem to see himself as worthy of jaster’s legacy and thus attempts to pass it on to his son, resulting in the high and narrow expectations he sets for boba as mentioned in bullet point #3. boba himself concludes as much as an adult. on top of the trauma of losing his family, jango also seems to have been traumatized by his time as a slave. most notably, when he’s being tortured after being captured by target komari vosa, he at first remains fairly stoic, even as she starts to mutilate his face. it isn’t until she mentions enslaving him that he seems to panic, struggling desperately to get away. vosa even laughs and says that she must have touched a nerve with her comment. basically: fetts be traumatized :(

soft spot for (some) kids: another thing that’s interesting about jango is that he... usually attempts to do right when kids are involved. i say “usually” bc fat lot of good it did all the cloned children he had a hand in creating >:( but, for example, after killing a runaway clonetrooper as part of a bounty, he finds out that the clone had a son. unwilling to let the child live in poverty due to his own actions, he has regular payments sent to the boy’s mother to help support him. in another instance, jango and zam help deliver an artifact to a client who intends to use it to carry out a terrorist attack on coruscant against millions of civilians. when zam finds out about the client’s intentions, she’s horrified and goes to jango demanding they steal the artifact back. jango completely brushes her off at first, telling her it’s not his problem and that he needs to spend more time with his son. zam coldly asks him how many “sons” he thinks live on coruscant. needless to say, her argument convinces him to join her in stopping the terrorist plot :,)

aaand that’s all i got at the moment! i hope it helps to characterize jango a little bit more!

[yayteaberry]

*SFW* Babysitting (Bakugou)

Rarely did he ever take a Saturday off from either training or studying, he was determined to stay better than everyone else. But, it had been raining since yesterday and he felt like he deserved a break anyways. From morning to afternoon, he enjoyed doing absolutely nothing, scrolling his social media and avoiding liking any of his friends posts on principle.

Shitty hair still won’t shut up about the selfie he liked so now nobody gets any.

His planned day of nothing is interrupted by a knock at his door, and he’s been pacified by memes to a degree where he doesn’t react violently to the intrusion.

Instead he shoves his phone into his pocket as gets up and opens the door, plain faced until he sees it’s you and that you’re holding something. Well, someone.

“Hey!”, you greet with an unusual level of enthusiasm, “I need you to do a favor for me.”

“A favor?”, he asks while he takes in the fact that you’re holding a baby, dressed in a striped onesie.

“Yeah, I’m kinda busy with stuff and I need someone to keep an eye on this little cutie for a bit!” To emphasize the importance or maybe sway him, you turn the baby around so he can see the chubby face.

“... If you’re asking me to babysit it, then no.”

You click your tongue against your teeth, rolling your eyes. “Well don’t call her by ‘it’, and I really need you to do this for me!”

He puts a hand on the door to signal that he’s about to close it, “Nah. Ask shitty hair or Deku, I think they’d love to drool over your kid.” “It’s my aunts baby!”, you say as you put your foot over the threshold, jostling the baby somewhat, which excitedly babbles as it meets his eyes, “They’re busy too, I tried asking! Believe me, you weren’t my first choice.”

“What do you mean by that?” He speaks with annoyance, opening the door fully as his competitive nature rises.

Internally you give a sigh of relief, externally you place the baby on your hip. “Bakugou, I think we both know that you’re awful with children. But you’re my last option and I have nowhere else to turn.”

“I should’ve been your first choice! I’m a fuckin’ wiz at keeping brats well behaved! Gimme!”

“Ah!”, you step out of range of his attempted grab and put out your pointer finger, “Don’t yell at the baby, don’t be aggressive with the baby, and most of all, don’t yell at the baby.”

In spite of your words you know full well he’ll do nothing of the sort, just wanting to give the appearance so he’ll be on his best behavior. He doesn’t have to know he was actually the only one you wanted to watch her.

After all his surface level bullying you can tell he’s soft on the inside, knowing he’s the least likely to give into a baby's whims while also being gentle enough to avoid making her cry.

“Yeah yeah.”, he grumbles, taking her from you when you extend her towards him, “When are you gonna collect the brat?”

You give a 50/50 gesture, shrugging, “Ah an half hour to two hours, but I’ll be back before three hours for sure! She’s been fed and changed recently but just in case,” A bag is revealed when you pull it from behind your back, taking it off by the strap and setting it inside.

“Diapers and toys, if she’s hungry there’s something for her in there too. Just, be careful about that, she’s sorta young for it.”

He nods at your words, watching her grapple at his shirt, having not once taken his eyes off her.

“Thank you!”, you chirp and give him a kiss on the cheek, knowing that he can’t do anything about it while holding her. That makes him glance up at you with some minor malice, which is reduced severely by the dusting of pink across his nose.

With that you take your leave, confident he’ll do fine.

He shuts the door and sits at the edge of his bed, cradling her in his arms. After a moment he takes a look over to the bag you left, thinking it’d probably be best to fish something out of there for her to do.

While he wasn’t experienced in caring for a baby in any capacity that felt like common sense. Plus, it’d allow him to continue wasting time on his phone.

“You,” he gently places her on the middle of the bed as he stands, “are not taking my Saturday from me with your tiny incapable hands.”

With one hand he grabs the bag off the floor and sets it on the bed beside her, opening it and digging through its contents. You were right, the thing is loaded with diapers and many different plastic objects.

Keys, babies love keys.

That toy seems the best choice, taking that and a blanket out before putting the bag on the floor nearby, holding the baby like a barrel under his arm while he flattens the blanket, then placing her on her belly.

He dangles the keys in front of her, watching as her eyes widen as she takes a horribly aimed swipe towards them. With a laugh tinged snort he lets her have them, sitting with his back against the bed and taking his phone out, resuming his leisure hobby.

A minute passes before he peeks over at her to make sure she’s still there, idly chewing on an orange key. It reminds him of something a puppy would do, up until she shoves it in way too far.

He drops his phone and yanks the keys away with concern she’ll vomit, not expecting her to look so upset over it. Briefly she contentedly waits for them to be returned, but when it becomes apparent they aren’t, she scowls.

“No,” he preemptively says, putting the keys down at his other side to keep them away, “you did something fucking stupid, so now they’re off limits. Don’t get all upset over it.”

She huffs and slams a hand down a few times, making a ‘gah’ with very demanding intent.

“I said no. Let me find something else then, calm down.”, he says as he reaches over to grab something random out of the bag, finding a plush red dinosaur. “See? Fun. Chew on this.”

He sets it down in front of her, and she immediately pushes it over, repeating herself. If nothing he gives her credit for having a strange amount of object permanence.

“I. Said. No. The fuck do you want me to do? You’re the one who can’t handle having the damn thing!” With a curt ‘no’ as a final statement, he leans over her to shove the keys back into the bag.

This turns out to be a huge mistake.

In a universally understood way, her face screws up as she starts taking in heavy breaths, which makes his eyebrows raise.

“Don’t. No crying.” his tone is as assertive as he can get it, shaking his head as if to cement it. Her tiny face turns red, sniffling once before fat tears begin to roll down her cheeks.

With no idea what to do in this situation, he starts rummaging through the bag for a solution, diapers spilling out as he digs for a similar toy if there even is one. He cringes as she really starts crying, caving and getting the keys back out, giving them to her. “See? See??”

She either doesn’t notice or doesn’t care, bawling in the way only babies do, arms giving out as she lays down.

His instincts on consoling anyone are terrible and usually not to be followed but he acts without thinking, picking her up and setting her in his lap, bouncing his leg as he pets her back, softly shushing her, ignoring the part of him that does in fact wish to yell at the baby.

Her tiny body trembles, pawing at his shirt as she rubs her tear stained face into it. Continuing to follow his instincts he lifts her up, both arms cradling her as her head rests against his shoulder. She does eventually calm, relaxing as quiet hiccuping replaces her sobs, breathing regulating.

She's effectively soothed, he on the other hand is completely shaken up.

Jesus, why did that scare him so much? He’d heard babies cry before and always was irritated by it, but this time there was something so different about it. Even now his heart is still racing, mouth dry as he stares forward into the wall with a mixture of worry and gratefulness.

Once she’s relaxed, he picks up the previously discarded dinosaur, placing it in his lap next to her. Thankfully, she seems to have forgotten about the keys, happy to latch onto the plushy.

He takes his phone back out with the intent to resume his earlier scrolling, but he can’t entirely take his eyes off her.  He’s more interested in watching her reactions than he’d ever admit.

In some ways she reminds him of you, mainly the eye color and the way her cheeks pinch up when she smiles.

You seem the motherly type to him so he assumes you’re leagues better at this than he is, but you’ve never mentioned having to babysit her before.

In fact you’ve never mentioned her before at all.

Maybe you enjoyed doing it but kept quiet so you didn’t have anyone intruding or asking to see her, babies can feel stranger danger so that made sense, it’d probably be overwhelming. She doesn’t hate him though, maybe you knew that she wouldn’t? 

Despite the panic she’s sent him through he really wouldn’t mind watching after her again. It'll probably be easier with you here, though he isn’t sure what he’d do if you were, he’d just be sitting around while you did everything.

God, she is really goddamned adorable. He smirks as he takes a second to allow himself to outwardly express something positive, watching her slap her tiny hand against the toy.

Usually the idea of having a baby is the worst one anyone can have, but right now he isn’t all that opposed to it. Not that it looks simple, more that it looks to be worth it.

He knows he’d make super cute babies, based on what he looks like and has always looked like the kid would outshine any other snot maker.

While he didn’t know what you looked like as a baby he just assumed you did too, briefly considering what a baby would look like if it came from you and him.

He’s got his mother's blonde hair despite his father's brunette coloring so that’s a dominant trait, possibly overriding your own but who can know, it’d more likely have more of your features.

Out of anything he’d want a little girl just like this one, though he’d be happy with anything as long as it's yours. Your features have always been something he likes, face as well as body, you’re built well in every aspect he tends to care about.

That, and your winning personality, even he can see that it’s a very pleasant contrast to his own. A kid with a mixture of both would be undoubtedly unstoppable, making him proud left and right.

Suddenly the thought bubble pops as reality rises to the surface.

You’re not his and he doesn’t like you anyways, this doesn’t bear so much thinking since it’ll never happen.

A heat takes to his cheeks as he tries to move on and pretend he wasn’t having a domestic fantasy involving you, mostly pretending he hadn’t had any fantasies about you.

It was something that’d creep into his mind sometimes.

Kirishima and Deku tended to have some softer traits alongside their bolder ones but it just wasn’t the same coming from either of them.

You had a certain tenacity to you, it was totally within your options to let some rich older man take care of you but you wanted more for yourself, you wanted to be a hero.

It made you strong, and you were strong because you worked for it constantly. As thick as your innocence tended to be, he was fairly confident you could knock him unconscious if it strikes you as the right choice.

He shook his head and made an effort to clear out all his emotions, directing his attention back towards the baby to ground himself. 

At some point during his daydreaming she’d knocked out cold, the dinosaur laying on the floor beside him, propped up against his chest, quietly snoozing while drooling a slight amount. Even if he wanted too he couldn’t be grossed out, it was way too cute of a sight for him to get mad.

Looking at her makes him feel tired, so he decides that taking a nap wouldn’t be a terrible idea. Careful to avoid waking her, he shifts around to get comfortable, hooking an arm around her so she doesn’t teeter backwards while he’s moving.

He thinks about whether he should turn her over and lay her on the blanket, unsure of what the proper protocol is.

His neck is gonna get super fucked up if he stays sat like this, so he very slowly gets up and lays on his bed, keeping her held to his chest until he’s flat enough to let gravity do the work. For a moment he returns to thinking about laying her on a flat surface but he lets her stay as she is, being a light sleeper means he’ll be able to deal with any problems if there are any.

-

After thanking Aizawa for the extra sparring lesson, you quickly get yourself showered and changed.

It’s been about two hours since you left her with Bakugou and you were getting increasingly worried he was reaching his limit.

Honestly you didn’t expect to be gone this long, but you were glad you gave him the estimate because it meant he’d have less reasons to be upset with you.

You prepare yourself for him to yell at you for leaving him alone with a demon for so long, even if she’s rarely a problem you do suspect he’ll be dramatic.

Still, it was a godsend that he said yes to begin with, you were going to make sure to tell him that.

When you get to his room you don’t bother with knocking, opening it to let yourself in without hesitation.

You were going to say something, but you forget the instant you lay eyes on the scene in front of you.

Practically swooning, you place a hand over your mouth to prevent making any noise, getting your phone out to document perhaps the cutest thing you’ve ever seen.

He’s laying on his bed, one arm over her and one over his eyes to block out the light, her tiny hands secured around the collar of his shirt, both of them peacefully asleep.

Not intending it to be blackmail but being aware it would probably become that, you take pictures from several different angles, wanting nothing more than to show everyone.

Though, for his own sake, you don’t actually send them anywhere near the class.

This doesn’t mean you don’t send them all to his mother, you do.

It does pain you to know you’ll have to hold off on showing people lest the information come back to him, but you do make it your phones home screen anyways. 

[myenterpriseisparked]

Hi! I see from a while back that you did a hogwarts house analysis for LOTR characters and I wondered if you would be interested in doing it for the Voyager crew?

Sure! Lemme just *dusts Harry Potter part of brain off* clean this thing up. It's been awhile since I've thought about Hogwarts houses but this should be fun!

Captain Janeway - Honestly, she's a little tough to pin down. On one hand, her risk-taking habits and self-sacrificial attitude in the name of saving her crew make her seem like a Gryffindor. On the other hand, so much of her character is defined by curiosity and a desire to gain knowledge, which would make her a Ravenclaw. I think she could go into either house, but I'm going to stick her in Gryffindor because I think her Gryffindor traits slightly outweigh her Ravenclaw traits. Also she made the physical embodiment of Fear itself feel afraid and if that ain't the most Gryffindor thing you've ever heard IDK what to tell ya.

Chakotay - Hufflepuff, but a VERY CHAOTIC Hufflepuff. A lot of his character is defined by loyalty to the crew and Kathryn and caring for the crew and Kathryn. While he shares some of Janeway's recklessness and they both serve a parental role on the ship, Chakotay's character seems to rely a lot on connections/relationships with other people and this makes him feel more Hufflepuff-y. That being said, he's the Hufflepuff who will literally punch you across the face if you're talking shit about his friends and make a few dad jokes along the way (gosh I love him).

Tuvok - Hot take, but I think Tuvok is a Gryffindor. Dude literally broke the rules of being a Vulcan so many times as a youngster and then decided to become a security officer for Starfleet. He's got a level of chaos to him and it feels very Gryffindor-y to me. Though he's driven by logic, his logic is used to calculate acceptable risks and to tell fear to buzz off. Very Gryffindor.

Tom Paris - A Hufflepuff who's trying really hard to look like a Gryffindor. Dude's been chasing the desire to feel something his whole life. He's a himbo hotshot pilot. Underneath all of that, though, is a desire to prove himself to his loved ones and keep them safe. He's a history geek who just wants to curl up with his wife on the couch and watch cartoons. His desire for deep connections with people is another classic sign of a Hufflepuff.

Harry Kim - Hot take, but Harry is a Slytherin. While he has a lot of traits that would let him fit in any house, I ultimately put him here because so much of his story is about Harry striving to reach something. He's reaching for a promotion, he's reaching to make their sensors/engines/shields better. He's reaching for good relationships with the crew. He's reaching for home. His character is centered around a desire to keep being better in every area of his life. He's also very clever; he comes up with so many solutions to so many problems and a lot of times it's because he thinks differently from a lot of the other senior officers. Very Slytherin.

B'Elanna Torres - Ravenclaw. She doesn't like rules set by other people, she's constantly seeking new knowledge, and she likes to have her own space. It takes a lot of time to earn her trust and a deeper friendship takes even longer to build.

The EMH - Slytherin. He's ambitious and he's very clever. Need I say more?

Neelix - Hufflepuff. Seems like an obvious answer, but Neelix's character is all about hospitality, loyalty to the crew, and building relationships with people.

Kes - She could fit is a few houses, but I think I'm going to put her in Ravenclaw. Like Neelix, a lot of her character is centered around building relationships with other characters, but the difference is that her relationship-building is the result of carefully studying people's behavior. She's also very clever, even in her more "nurturing" moments (like when she suggests that the Doctor might need to experience being sick to improve his bedside manner and then proceeds to infect him past when the "sickness" was supposed to clear up to prove a point). She also soaks up knowledge and experiences like a sponge. Part of it is because her species are naturally fast learners, but she also has a true love of learning that causes her to go to the surface of her planet at the risk of never seeing her family and friends again just so she can see the sun and to later leave Voyager in pursuit of understanding the new kind of being she has become.

Seven - Seven is also hard to pin down because she's a complicated character, but I'm going to put her in Ravenclaw. The Borg in general are driven by a pursuit of knowledge, which is something Seven carries over into her life after being severed from the collective. She's a stickler for efficiency, wields logic like a weapon, and studies the life around her.

Thanks for the ask! If I missed any characters you want me to analyze lemme know!

[pizzazz-party]

Part 3: Ring’s Biology and Possible Origins

In the world of Ring Fit Adventure, there exist monsters, ghosts, cyborgs, robots, gods, a curious array of animals, human beings of enormous size…and Ring. Ring—a creature so entirely unique, he fails to fit into any of those categories.

Everyone has their own idea as to what Ring is, and as to where he came from. So here’s mine.

(Spoilers for the end of the main storyline. Various postgame dialogue spoilers beyond that.)

If we’re going to talk about where Ring might have come from, it makes sense to look for clues in what he’s presented as. Physically, and subtextually. So let’s take it from the top.

Stepping away from the confines of the game, Ring’s shape is based off a Pilates ring, a piece of exercise equipment who’s history dates back to nearly a century ago, as of the game’s release. It was invented to help rehabilitate wounded soldiers through physical therapy following World War I. Design-wise, though…Ring’s face draws heavy inspiration from depictions of Ancient Inca art. Specifically, he looks a lot like the figure atop this ceremonial tumi knife.

The prominent nose. The familiar jawline. A headpiece bisecting the brow. The blue commonly set into the eyes of the art. The ears—heavy earrings were unisex among the Inca nobility, resulting in long, stretched lobes. But most importantly—the statue is gold. And in the ancient Inca Empire, gold was revered as being sweat from the very sun itself. Metal nowadays is often associated with machinery, with invention. But raw metal has always been a fruit of the earth, as natural as any wood or leaf. The Inca took it a step further. They thought of gold as mystical.

Likewise, Ring’s design is meant to invoke these traits. Despite being made of metal, Ring visibly lacks gears or wiring or nozzles or hatches. His mouth may have a hinge and his flaming little hair piece may spin around. But in terms of “build,” Ring (the magical metal donut) has more in common with Pinocchio (the magical wooden puppet), than with an actual machine.

On a surface level, Ring really is best described as a “magical creature.” He’s obviously not made of flesh and blood. But he’s alive in a way that the closest comparison—sentient robots—just aren’t. Ring sweats, breathes, sleeps, eats. He ages. His metal face flexes and grows and shrinks as he speaks. Ring wields exercise energy, much in the same way that humans do, and more. He crafts, enhances, and stores things with it. Its raw essence flows through him like a fiery kind of lifeblood.

Ring’s not a human or a cyborg. He’s not a monster or a ghost or an animal. He’s made of metal like a robot, and that’s about it. And while Ring may (presumably) have the long life of a god, he lacks everything else. Right down to the proper shape and abilities. Ring, whatever the specifics, is a “magical creature” that exists in a class of his own. We never ever meet another being quite like him.

…At least. That’s what I used to think.

———

The thing with Ring is, it’s hard to tell whether he’s actively omitting facts or just forgetting them. He’s got a terrible memory. But he also as good as lies to us in the beginning, pretending as though Dragaux’s just some enemy to him.

So here is what I understand.

We meet Ring, and he and Dragaux are positioned as these perfect opposites, as perfect enemies. Ring builds others up, and Dragaux tears them down. Dragaux is flashy, an eyesore, the purple to Ring’s yellow, and yet he steals the stage every time. He’s a jerk, but he’s Ring’s jerk. We show up to every boss fight because we are invested in his story, his opinions, his downward spiral.

And that’s our first mistake, really. Because Dragaux’s accent color isn’t purple, it’s pink. Because Dragaux’s opposite isn’t Ring, it’s Trainee. And Ring’s real foil was never Dragaux, but Dark Influence itself.

———

Have you ever thought about how strange it is, this particular parasite. From a narrative standpoint, I mean. As much as it’s referred to as “Dragaux’s influence” or “Dragaux’s aura,” Dragaux is only its latest meal, not its source. And that meal has been lasting anywhere from decades to a century, at least. Dark Influence is, by nature, negativity incarnate. It could be as old as the hills. Older, maybe.

Dark Influence is voiceless, faceless. A parasite composed of pure negative exercise energy, it can theoretically exist on its own. But it thrives best when entrenched in the heart of a host. Its host—a physical creature that, once ensnared, starts exhibiting traits that belong to the Influence: like great swathes of flame in its signature color.

Does that not sound. Familiar.

Because Ring and Dark Influence? Fulfill eerily similar roles, in regards to their syncing partners.

Both of them harness their partner’s exercise energy. Both of them augment the abilities of their partner. But unlike Ring, who’s always actively helping Trainee in precise and creative ways…Dark Influence doesn’t care. I’m not sure if it can give a care about anything that doesn’t include “amassing power” and “spreading itself.” (And I think those are just instincts. I’ve yet to see proof that this thing has anything approaching a complex personality.) But whether or not it cares about Dragaux, it’s fully anchored within his body. It shares its strength with him because there’s nowhere else to store it.

Because unlike Ring, Dark Influence lacks a physical body of its own.

And that thought. How it “lacks” a body. Just sort of stuck around in my head. Because it’s funny, isn’t it? That Ring speaks and this thing doesn’t. That Dark Influence, this wildfire, is so strong and potent and infectious while Ring’s inner flames are so small and orderly and self-contained.

And then I started thinking about coins. Isn’t it funny, that they’re shaped like little rings. Isn’t it funny, that they sometimes just. Spring out of the ground.

How does a free-to-play gym turn a profit. How do all of these gyms, turn a profit.

If NPCs canonically collect coins on their travels just like Trainee… If someone isn’t just throwing away buckets of money into the mountains and rivers and skies… if golden little rings can just spring into existence alongside someone as they’re jogging…

What if it’s not a quirk. What if it’s not just a game mechanic.

What if everything—the coins, the EXP medals, the treasure chests with Ring’s face on them—what if they’re all byproducts that occur when a physical place is saturated with high amounts of foot traffic. With high amounts of exercise energy. People in Ring Fit Adventure constantly expel this stuff as they jog or work out or engage in fit battles. They don’t really direct it anywhere after its release. It just kind of gets absorbed into their surroundings. I always assumed that it helped make the land so lush and pretty, but what if it doesn’t stop there. What if, when large quantities of it gather, exercise energy naturally builds up and condenses itself into permanent, physical solids.

And I thought of Ring. Of the coins that are shaped like him. Of the medals that eerily share his face. Of the treasure chests especially, the way they scream and run and flex as though alive. (And I thought about Dragaux, who’s canonically brilliant, and how even his best statues fell short of capturing that same quality of animation.) I thought about how all three of these byproducts are golden. Just. Like. Ring.

Something like “dark” influence should have a natural counterpart. It’s a tale as old as time; perfect opposites, perfect enemies. But we never meet the Influence’s other half, do we? Just Ring.

Ring, our buddy, our pal. Ring, who’s a person in every way that matters, with hope and dreams and insecurities. Ring the “magical creature,” who, despite all of this, has more in common with Dark Influence than with any other creature in all of Ring Fit.

———

So here is the heart of my crazy theory.

Ring isn’t “partially” made of energy. He’s all energy, all the way down to his every last piece, whether it flows like a river or shines like a stone. And it could be that a long, long time ago, he existed much in the same way as the Dark Influence we fight in the game: as an unrestrained and formless entity. Not as a ring, but as a bright and brainless swathe of flames.

(Because if Dark Influence is insecurity and self-destruction and decay, balance would dictate its opposite be positivity, self-improvement, rebirth. A dangerously Bright Influence.)

And maybe it was just a natural process that got triggered when the conditions were right. But either way, somehow, someway, this particular Influence reincarnated into a shape that could better interact with people, without overwhelming or eating them. And that most natural shape condensed itself into Ring.

A baby Ring.

———

Even if you don’t buy into the existence of “Bright” Influence, Ring fully being some sort of life energy incarnate answers too many questions. It would explain why Ring is so good at manipulating exercise energy; it’s the most natural extension of himself. It would explain why Ring has the unique ability to sync with people; it’s how he originally used to exist, as life energy drifting in and out of living creatures. It would explain the aging. It would explain why Ring never mentions a parent or creator watching over him during childhood; because he came into this world totally alone. (Baby Ring belonged to no one before he belonged with Baby Drags.)

But Ring’s theoretical past life answers a few more questions. It could explain parts of Ring’s personality, his interests. (His dream of spreading positivity across the land.) It explains why there aren’t ten million Rings floating about, when coins and medals and chests are so relatively common. (Because there’s a key ingredient missing). It actually explains his five special powers. (Because I’m betting Influences have human-related origins. It’s either that, or “live humans being consumed” was part of the “perfect” conditions surrounding Ring’s birth. Which, cringe.) But more than anything, it addresses the sheer power imbalance happening between Ring and Dark Influence right now.

Dark Influence lacks boundaries and spreads itself like a virus, thoughtless and instinctive. Ring’s natural weapon against this thing should be to “infect” it right back. (I would expect some sort of sick light show to dance across Dragaux’s body during battle; yellow flames squaring off against purple.) But it doesn’t work that way. Ring the Person no longer works this way.

If Dark influence is a forest fire, then Ring is a fireplace set behind glass. At their core, these two are both energy. But the modes in which they exist divide them into separate skill sets entirely.

Dark Influence is wildfire of brute strength. It’s got range—in the spatial sense. It can spread to as many secondary hosts as Dragaux directs it to, so long as it’s fed well enough to reach for them. Compared to Ring’s measly one syncing partner, Dark Influence can sink itself into whole regions, can simultaneously feed off of so many people. It doesn’t have outright mind control powers; it’s more subtle than that. But its presence as negativity incarnate naturally works like a magnet to draw out the worst in people. There is nothing it enhances in a person that wasn’t already there, no matter how small the weakness. Coupled with the rush of power it imparts in its vessels, it makes bad decisions feel right. Even to good people. It’s, quite simply, a bad influence. (And then it consumes them.)

But other than that, Dark Influence doesn’t really do much.

Our bud Ring may only be able to light one house at a time, so to speak. But as contained as he is—Ring’s powers are more varied and nuanced, because Ring is more varied and nuanced. He’s always actively (and thoughtfully) applying energy to construct, convert, and amplify. For all its fearsome strength, the only thing Dark Influence can seemingly do on purpose, is feed.

———

(If Ring was once a being like Dark Influence, then that solves the final mystery of synchronization. If Dark Influence “infects” its host by sinking into the body, then Ring syncs with a partner by “planting” a piece of his essence inside them. This is why Trainee’s energy signature changes to mimic Ring’s; because she now carries a part of him in her beating heart. This is why Ring can freely access her energy; because this makes her a part of him now, too.)

———

So. Let’s pretend I’m not crazy. Say that all of these little details I’ve collected were intentionally laid out by the game developers. Say I’m correct, and that Ring really is, essentially, the child of Dark Influence’s greatest natural enemy.

The real question is: how self aware is Ring about all of this.

Because unfortunately, Ring not knowing his own backstory could be pretty on-brand for him. I love Ring, but from his point of view, it really could be that he just appeared one day, somehow—as an entirely clean slate. “Dark” or “bright,” these entities are brainless. Literally. No body means no brain. They can’t store memories, so they don’t have memories. Just energy.

Ring must know that he’s made from energy, too. He might even think of himself as one very lucky byproduct. But if this is really what Ring used to be (if there’s even a shadow of a chance that his predecessor used to eat people), then he might not know the full extent of his own story.

And maybe that’s for the best. I can’t imagine him choosing to get close to people otherwise. He loves people, cares so much about every single silly soul that he meets.

This would hurt him.

———

Whatever Ring’s origins may be, whatever he might have once been (if he’s ever been anything else at all)… I do know one thing. And it’s that I prefer him prefer him just the way he is.

Weird comments about my sweat aside, I wouldn’t have him any other way.

———

TL;DR: Our bud Ring has more in common with Dark Influence than with any other creature in all of Ring Fit.

If a flaming entity of negative energy can exist, then why not one made of positive energy? If positive energy condenses into permanent solids naturally and often…if Ring is made of positive energy…if Ring has more in common with Dark Influence than with anything else in this game…

Who’s to say that Ring himself, wasn’t once a flaming yellow mass of energy.

———

This marks the end. I could run wild with all the implications this theory leaves in its wake. But I’ve made my point. I’ve found every answer I was looking for. And they may not have been the answers I was expecting (or even wanting), but they’ve satisfied me all the same.

I’m done. Believe what you will.

Thanks for reading, and for sticking with me all this way. It’s been real.

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DISCLAIMER: My name is Pizzazz and I take this game way too seriously. This is all for fun! At the time of this post, I am on World 36 of the post game. I feel pretty strongly about my conclusions, but I’ll go back and edit this if/when/where applicable.

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RING ANALYSIS

Part 1: Synchronizing—How it Works and What It Tells Us About Ring

Part 2: Ring’s Powers—And What They All Have In Common

Part 3: Ring’s Biology and Possible Origins

[popurikat]

Newtmas essay when?

Finally getting to this, thanks for waiting, I needed to go over a few bookmarks. (Warning, this post contains spoilers from the MAZE RUNNER book and FEVER CODE book, so if you haven’t read either or yet and want the jist of my analysis; just know that in general the fandom interpreting Newt as gay before it was revealed on a twitter post was not just a random headcanon and that Thomas in general is portrayed to have very strong unconditional love for Newt throughout the series; and it shows. To the point that even the director for the movie has stated that Newt and Thomas have a strong bond and portrays that in the movies. I will also preface that I am NOT adding personal opinion anywhere here, these are just backings from quotes and how they are thus meant to be taken/read as. My words are taken as a reader who is currently reading Scorch Trials has yet to fully read Death Cure or Crank Palace.) Anways, without further ado at 3AM today, I’ll try my best to explain how even though Dashner tries his best to make Thomas have other, female love interests; he creates a not so subtle gay subtext for Tommy boy here when in the context of interacting with Newt throughout the lore. Apologies beforehand for any grammar mistakes along the way.

To commence, I am going to start with FEVER CODE, as its supposed to act as the story’s preface to the actual events that play out later. Newt and Thomas upon meeting each other describe their presence as “familiar” and or as a “long lost friend” and they genuinely hit it off from the start to the point that Newt is okay with having Thomas see him cry over the fact that he and his sister are separated since he is doomed to be WCKD’s control analysis as he’s the only one lacking immunity from the flare itself. Once Newt is done being emotionally vulnerable we get our first instance of his personal nickname for Thomas: “That’s the way things are Tommy,’ he said his voice not quite steady. ‘The world outside’s gone to hell. Why should we expect any different here? [...] He said it as if they’d been friends for years” (ch. 14).   An interesting note here is that Thomas doesn’t bother to correct him or stifle the moment by feeling that all this information was too much, he genuinely wanted to hear Newt out and is fine with seeing this side of him; if not slightly taken aback by how natural it is that they can converse about such aspects of their lives. In fact, Newt makes such an impact on Thomas that Thomas ends up that same night dreaming of him: “Throughout his shortened night, he dreamed of Newt and Sonya. Of Newt and Lizzy“(Ch. 14). The thing with Thomas though is that the idea of comfort and connection is very foreign to him as he’s been basically isolated all his life with only the adults like Ava to talk to and the one exception being Teresa as his only kid companion. So Thomas didn’t even think he could make others like him for being himself unless they were vital to the overall production of WCKD. Seeing this portion right before the end of chapter 14: “Alby, Minho, Newt, Teresa. Thomas had friends.” shows that Thomas really had to deep dive to see how he deals with personal connections and why he was excited about the notion of friendship. He could’ve been happy with just Teresa, but only fully cemented her bond to him as “friend” when his circle grew and these kids he got to hang with taught him he can be himself, a concept he didn’t realize was possible when all his life was dictated on what he was supposed to learn or do. It becomes especially clear just how controlled his life is with the aspect of sentiment when later on Teresa’s mental communication evokes physcial pain and fear in Thomas. I’ll get back to that later as its more of a small tid bit of Thomas’ view on his forced love interest, Teresa. And yes, I say forced because multiple sentences with Thomas have him even wish he could cease all communication with her. Moving on, let’s talk about mimicking for a second. As humans, we mimic as a behavioral response to become closer to the person we care about. It’s the reason why yawning or laughter is contagious and or why we copy the posture of the person we converse with face to face. Thomas is seen to do this the most with Newt’s quirks. I’ll give the example in chapter 15: “Newt has been promising them that he was saving something special, and he did that annoying zipped-lipped sign every time [...] the little light in his eyes showed he enjoyed every second of their torture” versus Thomas: “Thomas did Newt’s zipped-lipped gesture, and that got him a sharp poke in the ribs”. So, we know enough that Thomas’ mannerisms are developing as a sign that he wants to be closer to Newt and to continue this sense of playfulness they both enjoy from the other. This is the start of their budding bond and a clear indication that they hold each other at greater fondness than the rest through this unconscious copying. Through this copying, they also pick up on emotional cues the other lets up on. Newt is especially good at noticing small things like when Thomas is anxious or overthinking: “He was just shocked that with all their exploring, the others hadn’t already discovered it on their own. And there were supposed to be TWO mazes. How had Newt and his friends not stumbled upon either one of them? ‘Tommy?’ Thomas realized Newt was staring straight at him, eyebrows raised. ‘Sorry,’ he said embarrassed, ‘wandered off for a second there what did you say?’ Newt shook his head in admonishment. ‘Try to keep up, Tommy Are you ready to see the grat outdoors?” (ch. 15). Also in chapter 23: “Tommy?’ It was Newt, breaking him out of his thoughts. ‘I can see your wheels spinnin’ up there.’ He tapped the side of his head”. This furthers Newts perceptiveness on his friend and Thomas’ ability to pick out when he is being looked after. And they bounce off each other really well in that aspect. To the point that Newt can crack a joke he knows will land right on Thomas’ sense of humor: “Newt waggled his fingers in front of Thomas’ face [...] A laugh exploded out of Thomas’ mouth that sent a spray everywhere. ‘Sorry’ he said, wiping his lips on his sleeve” (ch.15). It’s enjoyable to know that at least at a surface level, they have fun together and can cheer the other up if needed or know when to ground the other to reality. It is also through these instances that as a reader I pick up that Thomas’ nervous ticks perhaps allude to an anxiety disorder he has; of which Newt is aware of and never puts Thomas down on for exhibiting. He in fact understands it and deals with it accordingly as he himself has a similar circumstance. SO, what does all this paying attention lead to? Thomas’ devotion to protect Newt. Yeah, thats right I said devotion. Thomas’ actions are influenced by his developed instinct to protect Newt at all costs. Here is the biggest example that comes to mind: “What in the world happened to Newt? -- Less then two hours later, Thomas had spliced together a series of camera clips [...] Thomas turned off the feed. He couldn’t take it anymore...Newt, Newt, Newt, Thomas thought, feeling as if the very air around him were turning black.”(ch.52). Essentially, Thomas seeing Newt plummet to his near death by falling from the maze wall as a result of Newt’s ongoing depressive state, this is the moment that makes Thomas realize WICKD isn’t as good as they seem and that he is going into the maze to save Newt. Its admirable how much self sacrifice Thomas does for someone he cares so much about, to the point that their name is like a mantra. Thats a sensible area of passion and fighting spirit for someone who is “just a friend”.    Oh and, the feeling of fondness is mutual mind you if I haven’t been clear. After experiencing the horrors of cranks for the first time, realizing Newt was not immune, and watching Newt until they entered the pits it has been months since they last interacted; this is their first reunion: “What’s up Tommy?’ Newt exclaimed, his face filled with genuine happiness at the pleasant surprise that’s been sprung on him. Thomas couldn’t remember exactly how long it’d been since he’d seen Newt. ‘You look bloody fantastic for three in the morning” (ch. 23). I need to preface this that Newt DOES NOT mean that sarcastically and that out of all the people in the room (Minho, Chuck and Teresa are there in this scene), Thomas only reacts this way specifically toward seeing Newt is okay and back.   The characters are also not afraid of being physically close. “Well, look who the bloody copper dragged in,’ Newt said, pulling Thomas into a big hug” (ch.31), “They shook hands, and then the two of them set off...” (ch. 31), and my favorite: “Thomas jumped at the sound, then stumbled. Newt tripped over him, and then they were both laughing, legs and arms tangled in a pile on the ground”(ch.32). I don’t think this far in the novel, Thomas has been AS (emphasis on as) comfortable with touch  with anyone else other than Newt. And thats a big step forward on the aspect of trust in a relationship, being able to be comfortable with the presence of another person enough to be as intimate with them as shown here.  And all this, is just fever code itself. Mind you this is not the MEAT of the novels as it came out later. But even without it, lets look at Thomas in Maze now, I’ll try to keep this segment a lot more brief. Here’s Thomas looking respectively at boys his age: “A tall kid with blond hair and a square jaw...a thick, heavy muscled Asian kid folded his arms as he studied Thomas, his tight shirtsleeves rolled up to show off his biceps [...] Newt was taller than Alby too, but looked to be a year or so younger, His hair was blond and cut long, cascading over his T-shirt. Veins stuck out of his muscled arms”(ch. 2). Thomas’ initial reaction to being surrounded by boys is to deeply analyze their rugged good looks and heavily emphasize their best physical traits. When reading this the first time, my mind immediately thought this boy at the very least is supposed to be portrayed as bi, especially when later down the line Teresa gets a similar descriptor: “...despite her paleness, she was really pretty...silky hair, flawless skin, perfect lips, long legs.” So right off the bat, we know that be it boy or girl, Thomas emphasizes how attractive someone looks in his eyes when he truly does have a sense of attraction to them. Case closed. Within the same chapter we get Thomas also immediately clinging onto Newt for a sense of grounding, it is now ingrained in him at this point that the boy is his lifeline, a person to rely on. “Thomas looked over at Newt, hoping for help.” And help he does, Newt in this chapter helps ease his worries, explain a general idea of what the glade is and even pats him on the shoulder a bit to ease tension. And Thomas doesn’t bat an eye in the same way he’s weary of literally everyone else. In fact, he’s eager to stay put with him as shown with; “If Newt went up there, then I wanna talk to him.” And if none of that seals the deal, we got early bird Newt being so touch starved he flattens himself next to Thomas to wake him up at the crack of Dawn in chapter 6: “Someone shook Thomas awake. His eyes snapped open to see a too-close face staring down at him, everything around them still shadowed by the darkness of early morning...’Shh, Greenie. Don’t wanna be waking up Chuckie, now, do we?’ It was Newt --the guy who seemed second in command; the air reeked of his morning breath. Though Thomas was surprised, any alarm melted away immediately”. This whole scene follows firstly by Thomas once again impressed by how strong Newt is and then Newt giving him a rundown of what everyone else was too afraid to show Thomas, the grievers. And you know, this scene could’ve ended well and everything as totally platonic, but then we have “Newt turned to look at him dead in the eye. The first traces of dawn had crept up on them, and Thomas could see EVERY DETAIL OF NEWT’S FACE, HIS SKIN TIGHT, HIS BROW CREASED.” Now, look me in the eye and tell me there is a hetero explanation on looking at your best bro like they are the sun reincarnated themselves. But let’s not hog all the homosexual undertones with Thomas here. Wanna know what Newt’s initial reaction to having a girl in the glade was? “It’s a girl,’ he said [...] Newt shushed them again. ‘That’s not bloody half of it,’ he said, then pointed down into the box. ‘I think she’s dead” (ch.8). It’s actually a stark contrast to the other gladers eagerly wanting to know her age, how pretty she looked, and calling dibs to date her; Newt isn’t interested in any of that, he’s more perplexed on her status and not even bothering to remark on her looks, he was the only one not to and even remarks a few other instances that girls are more Thomas’ domain. For instance, he makes a joke in fever code when Thomas remarks that the girls in the institution were going to tackle him down, Newt proceeds to point out sarcastically something along the lines of “wait, isn’t that YOUR dream though?” So Newt is pretty out spoken of his disinterest in girls, and his full admiration and attention on Thomas. Oh, and yes, Newt immediately switches over to “Tommy” the moment Thomas mentions he hates being called greenie, and once again it just becomes a thing between only the two of them. Newt is also the one to be straight forward about the whole Runners business. He warns Thomas about the dangers and doesn’t necessarily turn him down on his desire to be one, he in fact encouraged him to just wait until the right moment. “No one said you couldn’t, but give it a rest for now”(ch. 15). So once again, Newt is the voice of confidence and reason for Thomas to prosper. In turn, this time around Thomas is the one to catch when something is bothering Newt. For instance, “Newt chewed his fingernails, something he hadn’t seen the older boy do before...he was genuinely concerned -- Newt was one of the few people in the Glade he actually liked ”(ch.16). Interesting how we went from fever code “friend” to “like”. And also, when Newt explains his concern about the runners not coming back yet, Thomas pieces together how scared Newt is of the Maze without being told and goes to stand next to him as a physical presence to ground Newt as they wait near the entrance. In fact, this piece is trivial to understand why Thomas does what he does next. When everyone else had given up on the Runners still outside with 2 minutes left til closing, and Newt was escorted away from the entrance, Thomas waited. And when Thomas saw them, he yells to Newt, realizes he’s too far to do anything, and makes a decision himself. He KNEW how much Newt cared about his fellow Gladers, they were like family or “kin” as its said in the book, so what does he do? “Don’t do it Tommy! Don’t you bloody do it!’ ... Thomas knew he had no choice. He moved. Forward. He squeezed past the connecting rods at the last second and stepped into the maze”(ch.16). Yes, Thomas does this because of his empathy for the Gladers, but the chain reaction of Newt’s concern is what sets his decision in stone. And yet again, Thomas enters the maze for Newt.  And that’s pretty much the constant for the rest of Maze Runner the book, Newt just sticking up for Thomas and Thomas in turn just being happy that: “He was at least relieved that Newt was there” (ch.17). And thats basically their entire dynamic. Newt just going: “If you really did help design the maze Tommy, it’s not your fault. You‘re a kid -- you can’t help what they forced you to do” to ease the survivor’s trauma Thomas has, as well as saying “I actually believe you. You just don’t have an ounce of lying in those eyes of yours. And I can’t bloody believe I’m about to say this...but I’m going back in there to convince those shanks we should go through the griever hole, just like you said”(ch.51); and I think thats the most romantic thing to hear from him. Just right out being all for supporting Thomas no matter what happens as long as he stays alive and continues to fight, he doesn’t care about what happened before. And Thomas eats that up because it fuels him even more to seek out a means to escape for the people (Newt) that deserve a life outside of running from monsters forever. So essentially, I’ll state again, it’s always been Newt the catalyst for Thomas to run head first into the Maze and seek freedom. And with all this I can clear that these two are shown to if not be romantically involved, at least have unconditional love for the other that transcends the author’s original intention.  And with that in mind, here’s the thing with Teresa as a love interest. I can list here quotes of every time she mind speaks to Thomas and how that affects him, but then this would be too long. And this is a newtmas post gosh darn it. Teresa is gleeful to humiliate, control, hurt, and force Thomas to believe they’re in love. In multiple instances we get her barging into his mind unwarranted making him understand that she has full access to his inner most thoughts. Theres nothing romantic about that, and I think its why Thomas ends up being so perceptive to the smallest of gestures that allow him to think on his own and feel like his own person. Something I’ve seen Brenda do later in scorch, and something I’ve seen Newt do since the very beginning is that they allow Thomas to come to his own conclusions in order to create his own opinions on the matters at hand. Thomas’ love language revolves around words of affirmation. He likes it when people confirm his thoughts are valid and that remind him that WICKD can’t hurt him anymore now that he has the power to be his own person. This is where Newt comes in very handy. He allows Thomas to grow in ways his female love interests have yet to show, sorry Brenda but I’ve heard you were trying to unite all immunes together to the safe haven by the end and in a sense still only using Thomas to get by; I still think she was the better call than teresa of course and I have no remorse for Teresa getting smushed by a boulder. But essentially my point here is that, how do you fail to make your initial love interests clash so badly where one has no real care about the others well being so long as everything goes according to WCKD by using a form of gaslighting and manipulation? AND THOMAS HAS STATED HIS DISCOMFORT ON THIS MULTIPLE TIMES, but the narrative always erases these instances from his mind in place of pity for Teresa’s well being (as you can tell, Teresa through this becomes my least favorite character, I can rant about her some othe time though with proper backing). The narrative in turn treats it all like a joke. I understand there are scenes where Thomas is worried about her and looks out to make sure shes ok, but even then he doesn’t know how to react with mental images of her kissing his cheek or when she screams the next minute that she doesn’t know who he is or how hes speaking into her mind. And thats because they can’t properly communicate their emotions to the other, not even in fever code could Thomas give a forward answer if he loved Teresa or not, she just assumed. Come to think of it, Thomas really doesn’t show much affection to Teresa of his own accord. So then, how DOES Thomas show his affection? Thomas provides acts of service as his love language, if he cares about you enough he will risk his life for you. Why? Because Thomas values putting the people he loves foremost knowing full well they are what help him have purpose and succeed in continuing on. In a way, Newt and Thomas’ dynamic works in this instance because they balance the other out and because they have seen each other at their worst and at their best. In a way, that's why knowing the ending of the books makes it harder to accept that Thomas would just easily take the shot...when all his life clung to Newt’s survival. But that’s a story for another time where I compare the movies (of which let me make that clear, yes I prefer) over the books. For now just know that the book may have done this by accident, maybe not, but at the end of the day theres solid proof that Thomas and Newt care about each other in a way that is separately portrayed from their connection to the other glade members, and have this consistency of soft moments running through the entirety of the series. In conclusion; newtmas. Newtmas. NEWTMAS, etc.