#also no i am not paid for this my ass is not sponsored
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thedisablednaturalist · 7 months ago
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Guys Jansport adaptive backpack is on sale for 32% off on Amazon right now (blue color, pink color is on sale for 24%). The usual price is $70, right now it's $47.
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devilsskettle · 7 months ago
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i feel like i’ve been WAITING for the other shoe to drop wrt people’s opinions about watcher for this very reason. not that i think the reaction is completely not understandable but the greater the parasocial relationship, the greater the fallout as soon as public opinion shifts. you don’t have a relationship with these people they’re just content creators, chill
#ready to see all the people coming out of the woodwork to say how they’ve never liked watcher/unsolved/etc#and act like it’s ‘cringe’ now that their fanbase feels ‘betrayed’#it’s great to have a fanbase but parasocial relationships will bite you in the ass every single time#it’s interesting too though because i’ve seen watcher have a LOT of support as they’ve tried to build something separate from buzzfeed#so this is the first time they’re getting real pushback about a decision they’ve made wrt shifting their platform/expanding their brand#so ig we’ll have to see how they react moving forward#but it’s soooo interesting to see how enthusiastically people dump on buzzfeed#AND how many people dump on youtube and how over the years so much of its functionality has been stripped away#how many ads you have to sit through. how much sponsored content there is now. etc#but when they try to do the same thing with youtube that they did with buzzfeed it’s like how dare you not lick their boots#because if you lick their boots and we lick their boots we can watch stuff for free#anyway.#even if you don’t any to say it’s a bad business decision. it’s not like there’s not precedent for it#1) the move away from buzzfeed was successful and 2) what about the dnd shows or whatever#don’t you guys watch those dnd shows that are ‘behind a paywall’#don’t you guys have netflix hulu disney hbo amazon etc ad nauseum that are actually owned by billion dollar corporations#don’t you guys get on your high horses about supporting independent artists all the time#it’s interesting that people will profess to be such big fans!!! and feel like they’re friends!!!!#but how dare they think their work might be worth paying for#idk. idk. it’s entitlement though#sorry for the rant i’m ALSO not trying to blindly defend a bunch of people i don’t know#but you guys are being soooo fucking annoying about it lol#anyway i’m still waiting to see what their response is going to be from here before jumping to conclusions#also to be fair i am biased to be lenient about decisions made by independent filmmakers vs big studios etc#like everybody freaking out about the ai art used in late night with the devil. who cares honestly#‘they should’ve paid a real artist!!’ idk maybe their budget didn’t cover that#i don’t want it to become the industry norm but at the end of the day i would rather see indie shit getting made then only seeing#the big studios (who don’t have equitable practices anyway!!) making shit#but that’s another conversation. just to be transparent about my viewpoint on this kind of thing#maybe controversial but also can’t we have nuance. for once.
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literaticat · 25 days ago
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I was recently asked to do a panel event at a library in a neighboring county. The organizer said I could sell my books there, but when I inquired further she meant that literally, as they can't partner with any bookstores. I explained that as a trad pubbed author, selling my own books isn't something I can really do (at least not without a lot of weird financial/tax repercussions) and she said I could have people scan a QR code leading to my publisher's site to purchase and just provide them with book plates. I'm torn whether to do this event or not. On one hand, I'm sure it will be very fun, I do love supporting libraries, and I don't want to seem like a diva. On the other, I know that my time and energy are worth money, and I'd basically be doing this for free since I doubt I'll sell much via QR code. I am far enough into my career and successful enough that I'm not really interested in doing things just for the exposure. What would you recommend in this situation?
(ETA: sorry in advance, this came out lengthy, scroll to the bottom for my succinct answer if that's all you care about, OP!)
I think you have a good head on your shoulders, and it's smart to value your own time and energy. Yes, you should be paid for school visits and talks and that kind of thing, especially any that require travel, etc, UNLESS they are being sponsored by the publisher, like as part of an organized tour, and there will definitely be book sales, in which case, hey, you aren't going out of pocket and those can be QUITE good for sales.
But it is also a fact that sometimes, you will end up doing things for free, without remuneration and without a guarantee of huge sales, for any number of reasons: for charity, because you believe in the mission of whatever-it-is, for marketing/publicity purposes, or even just because it will be fun!
So you need to just do your own cost-benefit analysis. They'll do the QR code, which is nice, but you aren't guaranteed any sales, so let's say this event will definitely make you zero dollars. OK -- What are the Good Points vs Pain (in the Ass) Points?
For good points: Will it generate goodwill amongst your community or with people whose opinions you value? Is it for a charity or cause you believe in? Will there be potentially decision-makers there -- like librarians or teachers who might love your presentation and want to PAY you to participate in something later? Will it be FUN? Will there be other authors there that you want to meet / network with / hang out with / become besties with? How big a reach will this potentially have? (In other words - are we talking 5 people, or 500 people? Is it an event that might be covered by media? Because while you don't want to do things "just for exposure" when that exposure is dubious -- some great exposure wouldn't hurt!)
For PITA points: How much time will it take out of your life? (Include preparing for it, traveling to it, attending it, getting home, and decompressing from it)? Would it be costing you anything money-wise (gas money counts!)? Would it potentially take a toll on your health (mental health counts!)? Would you have to give up anything that would be MORE important to you in order to do it? (writing time, family obligations, time with your pets?) ETC.
The answers to these will be different from one situation to another, or even from person to person (after all, one person's "fun schmooze" thing is another person's "terrible chore"!) -- so weigh these options FOR YOU and see what you come up with.
Long story short:
It's good practice to say YES to anything that you can comfortably do to promote your book if you are getting paid for it or if the upsides outweigh the downsides.
But it's also healthy to have boundaries, and to say NO when that is not the case.
If you are going to say NO (again, a perfectly valid answer!), do so as early as possible, be extremely nice, and just say you are so sorry, you can't make it work, and best of luck with the event. DON'T frame it as "I only do PAID events" or anything like that -- that WILL make you sound like a diva from hell, even if that isn't the case! DON'T agree to it and then back out, because then you are putting them in the position of not having an event at all or having to scramble, ruining the thing they have spent time promoting, yadda yadda.
So in this case: If you haven't agreed to the event, and you decide the PITA points outweigh the good points, it's fine to decline. If you've already agreed to the event and it's happening soon, just suck it up and do it, lesson learned for next time.
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lilnasxvevo · 2 years ago
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Oh btw I saw a banner ad on the side of a bus the other day and I didn’t see what organization paid for this ad bc the bus was going too fast but it said something very close to “THE PLACENTA ISN’T SOME MAGICAL BOOZE BLOCKER” and presumably it was a PSA about not drinking when one is pregnant.
And like
Listen my sister has an advanced degree in public health
And I have listened to her talk about outreach a lot even though that is not currently what she is doing with her degree, like that’s definitely something she studied and stuff
And I don’t. Feel like! Being as smug and condescending as possible! Is the best way to get the biggest number of people to listen to you and heed your advice.
And I DO kinda feel like my sister has talked about liiiiike being compassionate, and meeting people where they’re at, and like, not making them feel bad!
And I just really REALLY feel like, if your aim is to reach people who have somehow not been taught that alcohol use during pregnancy affects the fetus, then like, just say that. Clearly they have been severely lacking in access to good information about sexual and reproductive health if they don’t know that and there’s no point in shaming them for not knowing something because no one taught them that, or because they were fed misinformation!
Overall I am just disgruntled with the disgruntlement of knowing that my sister could have thought of better copy for a banner ad than THAT SHIT in like 30 seconds. Possibly less.
And it does also make me think of like, sometimes you see billboards or commercials about quitting smoking that just don’t seem to be very persuasive, and you’re like “What government agency OK’ed this?”, and then you find out that the “organization” that’s sponsoring all these ads is actually a tobacco company who got in trouble for selling cancer sticks and had to do a bunch of half-assed “stop smoking” ads in penance. And that’s why they’re not good, because the people making them don’t actually care and actually sort of hope you DON’T stop smoking.
So, I’m gonna try to glimpse one of these buses again (unlikely) and try to see who sponsored it, because I sort of highly suspect that copy wasn’t actually written by public health professionals who are actually motivated to protect people. I think it was probably written by a marketing team working for an alcohol company that recently got in trouble, and I’d love to know who.
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8.24.23 Thursday
12:11 am
Strange who put it here... What is the plan of Uncle Jun to kill us here?? Why??? Bolo like in Lipa Batangas Massacre??
Who got the rituals and a change of spirit angels???
Can Uncle Jun will be able to hold his sanity here?
I need help here probably Uncle Jun will kill us...
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12:38 am
Hmm...What is inside of Uncle Jun?
But the food is sponsored by Uncle Jun lunch and dinner... Coz I can't shoulder everything now,angels...
I have analyzation... Why, this Cavite wanted to hurt my ego this is different story on my family here and separated from my job life...
I don't know what to do angels... I need to keep a job and I need money and it is not enough these days.. My needs, my baby-John's, my collagen on my feet and down there... I know I have to share coz this is my life now... I'm so tight now my personal budgeting and I have to keep the job in Iqor angels...
I have to pay on my friend Ely even a lil... I will also support him as my friend... Probably, what happened on Ely on his helping method on me was a blessing in disguise to be a friend of brother Rodel of wave 468! Probably, God wants me to be closer on brother Rodel... Probably, coincidence... Hmm... I'm also here at his back as his friend... But I'm still tight on my budgeting these days,angels...
1:21 am
I hope I can save money for my collagen and travel someday... I told Mia I really wanna go to Ilocos to visit their sand dunes but I also wish to travel in Dubai for the sand dunes as well and camel and donkey... Coz after we ate in Jollibee all my wavemates with our coaches Melai and John, while walking going back to our room Mia and I just had a chit-chat about our personal lives like her own family and my dream vacation or things that they usually do on their leisure time.
Still, thinking of my "Red Pouch"... Who took it? I have so many problems in my head... Bills, family character like who took my "Red Pouch"? What is the motive? Stuff like that...
On the other side... It was funny awhile ago in our classroom when Champi and Coach John had their role playing, thank God I was able to control myself not to laugh coz seeing their face and hearing them talking in English, it was funny coz they look like a zombie and their beauty is fading but still fighting in life... In my comic strip over my head these people are funny coz they look super wasted and still keep on talking in English. It was really funny angels, that all of us there will be a "living dead"...
I'm thinking if we're gonna have our movie the wave 468 and the rest of Iqor... Probably,the title is "The fight of the Living Dead or The last blow of the Living Dead or The last days of the Living Dead" it can be on 3 series, angels...
10:02 am
Still,waiting for Uncle DD for the bridging money for water bill... I don't have extra for myself and for John... I need soap here and shampoo.... The water bill is due today so I have to pay it... They will cut it angels today or this late afternoon...
I'm not relax everyday and I still have my sciatica or S-bones pain or priformis or pelvic pain...
Still, having windblow trap and I still feel self-pity.
10:17 am
I will explain something that I can't explain today...
1:18 pm
Spit on them those customer service and fat boy in Dasmarinas Water...
I asked nicely yesterday and I paid full today then they will tell me that probably it will be cut. Spit on them! SPIT ON THEM TODAY!
I went there yesterday and super bow on customer service that please can I pay the 1 month first for us not to have an interruption on water service they didn't allow me that fat bad ass boy... So, yesterday I was calmed and said ohkay will pay tomorrow coz it will be our due date.
Then I went today and talked to the non-sense Cavite Customer Service ( spit on them) I asked nicely if they have control on their employees not to cut us coz we paid it already in full... Coz they must have a reminder or control on their employees even on the field...
This will be a reimbursement some percentage,waiting for Uncle DD...
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bitchesgetriches · 3 years ago
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I am 25 and I’d like to start a Roth IRA so it has plenty of time to mature, but I don’t actually know how to do that.
All the financial information resources I follow (at least the ones that aren’t just advertisements) keep explaining what an IRA is, which I think I basically understand by now, and why investing is so important, which I am already convinced of considering I’m 25 and stressed out that I still haven’t started a retirement fund. However, they don’t explain HOW to actually do that.
Do I show up at my normal bank where I have my checking account and ask to start one? Is this the type of thing you’re supposed to do online or find like an investment firm or something? Should I look for a local credit union? What documents do I need? Can I just transfer the money from my normal savings account, or does it need to come out of a paycheck somehow? Is there some sort of step by step set of instructions that isn’t sponsored content trying to sell me something?
I am convinced of the importance of investing, and I would like to have a Roth IRA based on an index fund that is mostly hands off. Now that I’ve decided that, how on earth do I go about actually creating it?
I think we need to write a whole ass article about this, because you're not the first to ask. It surprises me that brokerages and banks don't make this shit more obvious, since they profit on us starting accounts with them. Anyway, here is your step by step, my precious child:
HOW TO OPEN AN INVESTMENT ACCOUNT
1. Pick a bank or brokerage firm. There are lots. You don't have to be an existing customer. Do some googling for reviews. Personally, most of my money is invested through Vanguard, but I've heard good things about Fidelity, Ellevest, and others.
2. Go to their website and click "open an account." You can also just google "[bank name] + Roth IRA" or "open a Roth IRA with [bank name]" which should get you where you're going.
3. Choose the type of account you want. In this case, you want to open a Roth IRA. That's a solid choice to invest for your retirement. But you can also start a straight "brokerage account" for general investing that isn't tax-advantaged like an IRA or other retirement account.
4. Follow the instructions on the website. Every bank's web interface will be slightly different, but I'll walk through some of the basic steps below. Important: YOU CAN ALSO CALL. I know not everyone is comfortable on the phone, but if you get stuck online, you can call the bank (the number will be on the site) and say "I'm a newbie investor and I'm trying to open a Roth IRA but I'm confused. Can you help walk me through it?" They're literally paid to help you.
5. Choose how to fund the account. You can do this very easily by transferring money directly from another bank or account. So if you have $1k saved up in a savings account at your local bank, you just need to get the bank name, routing number, and account number and input that when prompted.
6. Allocate the funds. THIS STEP IS INCREDIBLY IMPORTANT. They're going to ask where exactly you want your money invested. If you don't make a decision here, your money will by default go to Money Market... which means it's just sitting there as cash, not investments. So you have to allocate it to an actual investment vehicle. For the normal human being, I strongly recommend an index fund. My favorite is VTSAX, which stands for Vanguard Total Stock Market Index Fund Admiral Shares. But anything with the word "index" in it should be fine. You'll be given a list of options, and you can do some googling to research each one.
7. Set up an automatic deposit. This is optional, but I recommend putting a little bit in every month. If you're going with a Roth IRA, you can deposit up to $6k annually.
8. Go have a snack. You've just started investing, you deserve a treat!
9. Check back in 3-4 months. The stock market is cyclical. It goes up and down depending on a whole bunch of factors. If you look at your balance on the daily, you'll go insane with worry. So check on your investments quarterly, or every 3-4 months. Or don't! You could just sit back and ignore them until you're retirement age! You definitely don't need to do more than deposit money regularly, and (see above) you can automate that shit.
I hope that helps, little turtledove! Here are a bunch of articles we've written to help explain some of the terms I explained above:
Investing Deathmatch: Traditional IRA vs. Roth IRA
Investing Deathmatch: Investing in the Stock Market vs. Just
 Not
Do NOT Make This Disastrous Beginner Mistake With Your Retirement Funds
Dafuq Is a Retirement Plan and Why Do You Need One?
Another, super easy option for non-retirement investing is to open a micro-investing account. We recommend Acorns, and they're kind enough to sponsor us.
Start investing with Acorns
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thetetra · 1 year ago
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I want to listen to a podcast that isn't about making money. You can tell yourself that the quality hasn't dipped but it dips we can tell. The feel is immediately different than episodes you do because you love it.
This isn't really your fault... Sure you have bills to pay, sure you have kids now, but that's not reasons why your quality hasn't dipped its excuses for your quality dipping and why we should not be mad at you about it.
We as a society need to value creators more, just like small-witch-big-hat who paid their dues to make their experience commercial free... but the advertisement agency wasn't okay with not getting to ALL the listeners.
When I was taking German in highschool I learned that at a certain point they had TV commercials only at night. They had after 10 or 11, literally nothing to watch because till 5 or 6 am it was just commercial after commercial with basically no one watching.
We can demand that sort of advertising. You want to advertise on my show? Fine you are in a bloc that runs for 5 minutes before or after the show. You want to pay less you are after want to pay more you van go before. Yes you have to grin and bare it is going to get skipped by most viewers. You advertisers ALSO need to understand that just because I heard a commercial does not mean its as effective as you think it is.
When I need a plumber or a VPN or some service or another I don't sit down with my podcasts and favorite shows and old DvDs and start rummaging through them for the ads jammed into everything I just Google the service and my area code.
I then scroll past all the sponsored links that will do things like ignore that area code and start looking at reviews... but not yelp because they can pay to make bad reviews go away.
The whole thing is a giant pain in the ass but I think it is better than going through my podcasts seeing if somehow they have exactly what I need and to luck out that they are the best in my area.
A smarter way to advertise is have a dynamic short run of interesting things to do in my area and services I may not have heard of. Like what's new in super soaker technology.
Opened up an episode of @re-dracula and got an ad. Not an ad read, a full on fucking commercial for some convenience store or other. Instant unsubscribe. Advertising does not belong in podcasts, it corrupts everything it touches.
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qqueenofhades · 3 years ago
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Do you really hate this county? Or were you just ranting?
Sigh. I debated whether or not to answer this, since I usually keep the real-life/politics/depressing current events to a relative minimum on this blog, except when I really can't avoid ranting about it. But I have some things to get off my chest, it seems, and you did ask. So.
The thing is, any American with a single modicum of genuine historical consciousness knows that despite all the triumphalist mythology about Pulling Up By Our Bootstraps and the American Dream and etc, this country was founded and built on the massive and systematic exploitation and extermination of Black and Indigenous people. And now, when we are barely (400 years later!!!) getting to a point of acknowledging that in a widespread way, oh my god the screaming. I'm so sick of the American right wing I could spit for so many reasons, not least of which is the increasingly reductive and reactive attempts to put the genie back in the bottle and set up hysterical boogeymen about how Teaching Your Children Critical Race Theory is the end of all things. They have forfeited all pretense of being a real governing party; remember how their only platform at the 2020 RNC was "support whatever Trump says?" They have devolved to the point where the cruelty IS the point, to everyone who doesn't fit the nakedly white supremacist mold. They don't have anything to do aside from attempt to usher in actual, literal, dictionary-definition-of-fascism and sponsor armed revolts against the peaceful transfer of power.
That is fucking exhausting to be aware of all the time, especially with the knowledge that if we miss a single election cycle -- which is exceptionally easy to do with the way the Democratic electorate needs to be wooed and courted and herded like cats every single time, rather than just getting their asses to the polls and voting to keep Nazis out of office -- they will be right back in power again. If Manchin and Sinema don't get over their poseur pearl-clutching and either nuke the filibuster or carve out an exception for voting rights, the John Lewis Voting Rights Act is never going to get passed, no matter how many boilerplate appeals the Democratic leadership makes on Twitter. In which case, the 2022 midterms are going to give us Kevin McCarthy, Speaker of the House (I threw up in my mouth a little typing that) and right back to the Mitch McConnell Obstruction Power Hour in the Senate. The Online Left (TM) will then blame the Democrats for not doing more to stop them. These are, of course, the same people who refused to vote for Hillary Clinton out of precious moral purity reasons in 2016, handed the election to Trump, and now like to complain when the Trump-stacked Supreme Court reliably churns out terrible decisions. Gee, it's almost like elections have consequences!!
Aside from my exasperation with the death-cult right-wing fascists and the Online Left (TM), I am sick and tired of how forty years of "trickle-down" Reaganomics has created a world where billionaires can just fly to space for the fun of it, while the rest of America (and the world) is even more sick, poor, overheated, economically deprived, and unable to survive the biggest public health crisis in a century, even if half the elected leadership wasn't actively trying to sabotage it. Did you know that half of American workers can't even afford a one-bedroom apartment? Plus the obvious scandal that is race relations, health care, paid leave, the education system (or lack thereof), etc etc. I'm so tired of this America Is The Greatest Country in the World mindless jingoistic catchphrasing. We are an empire in the late stages of collapse and it's not going to be pretty for anyone. We have been poisoned on sociopathic-libertarian-selfishness-disguised-as-Freedom ideology for so long that that's all there is left. We have become a country of idiots who believe everything their idiot friends post on social media, but in a very real sense, it's not directly those individuals' fault. How could they, when they have been very deliberately cultivated into that mindset and stripped of critical thinking skills, to serve a noxious combination of money, power, and ideology?
I am tired of the fact that I have become so drained of empathy that when I see news about more people who refused to get the vaccine predictably dying of COVID, my reaction is "eh, whatever, they kind of deserved it." I KNOW that is not a good mindset to have, and I am doing my best to maintain my personal attempts to be kind to those I meet and to do my small part to make the world better. I know these are human beings who believed what they were told by people that they (for whatever reason) thought knew better than them, and that they are part of someone's family, they had loved ones, etc. But I just can't summon up the will to give a single damn about them (I'm keeping a bingo card of right-wing anti-vax radio hosts who die of COVID and every time it's like, "Alexa, play Another One Bites The Dust.") The course that the pandemic took in 21st-century America was not preordained or inevitable. It was (and continues to be) drastically mismanaged for cynical political reasons, and the legacy of the Former Guy continues to poison any attempts to bring it under control or convince people to get a goddamn vaccine. We now have over 100,000 patients hospitalized with COVID across the country -- more than last summer, when the vaccines weren't available.
I have been open about my fury about the devaluation of the humanities and other critical thinking skills, about the fact that as an academic in this field, my chances of getting a full-time job for which I have trained extensively and acquired a specialist PhD are... very low. I am tired of the fact that Americans have been encouraged to believe whatever bullshit they fucking please, regardless of whether it is remotely true, and told that any attempt to correct them is "anti-freedom." I am tired of how little the education system functions in a useful way at all -- not necessarily due to the fault of teachers, who have to work with what they're given, and who are basically heroes struggling stubbornly along in a profession that actively hates them, but because of relentless under-funding, political interference, and furious attempts, as discussed above, to keep white America safely in the dark about its actual history. I am tired of the fact that grade school education basically relies on passing the right standardized tests, the end. I am tired of the implication that the truth is too scary or "un-American" to handle. I am tired. Tired.
I know as well that "America" is not synonymous in all cases with "capitalist imperialist white-supremacist corporate death cult." This is still the most diverse country in the world. "America" is not just rich white middle-aged Republicans. "America" involves a ton of people of color, women, LGBTQ people, Muslims, Jews, Christians of good will (I have a whole other rant on how American Christianity as a whole has yielded all pretense of being any sort of a principled moral opposition), white allies, etc etc. all trying to make a better world. The blue, highly vaccinated, Biden-winning states and counties are leading the economic recovery and enacting all kinds of progressive-wishlist dream policies. We DID get rid of the Orange One via the electoral process and avert fascism at the ballot box, which is almost unheard-of, historically speaking. But because, as also discussed above, certain elements of the Democratic electorate need to fall in love with a candidate every single time or threaten to withhold their vote to punish the rest of the country for not being Progressive Enough, these gains are constantly fragile and at risk of being undone in the next electoral cycle. Yes, the existing system is a crock of shit. But it's what we've got right now, and the other alternative is open fascism, which we all got a terrifying taste of over the last four years. I don't know about you, but I really don't want to go back.
So... I don't know. I don't know if that stacks up to hate. I do hate almost everything about what this country currently is, structurally speaking, but I recognize that is not identical with the many people who still live here and are trying to do their best, including my friends, family, and myself. I am exhausted by the fact that as an older millennial, I am expected to survive multiple cataclysmic economic crashes, a planet that is literally boiling alive, a barely functional political system run on black cash, lies, and xenophobia, a total lack of critical thinking skills, renewed assaults on women/queer people/POC/etc, and somehow feel like I'm confident or prepared for the future. Not all these problems are only America's fault alone. The West as a whole bears huge responsibility for the current clusterfuck that the world is in, for many reasons, and so do some non-Western countries. But there is no denying that many of these problems have ultimate American roots. See how the ongoing fad for right-wing authoritarian strongmen around the world has them modeling themselves openly on Trump (like Brazil's lunatic president, Jair Bolsonaro, who talks all the time about how Trump is his political role model). See what's going on in Afghanistan right now. Etc. etc.
Anyway. I am very, very tired. There you have it.
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kookie-doughs · 4 years ago
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Beta Tester
Kozume Kenma X Reader
-YN LN is a popular mangaka
Chapter 16: Stage
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Seeing you running towards him made Kenma frown.
"Kenma!" You waved. "Thank you for not leaving yet!"
Ignoring you he continued to walk towards the direction of the stage.
You pouted and crossed your arms. "You know... As sorry as I am for that kiss I really don't regret it."
Jogging up in front of him with a shit eating grin, you positioned yourself in front of him where he'd have no choice but to look at you while you looked at him. His ears were slightly red without a doubt but who were you kidding yours were too.
Kenma cleared his throat, "Good for you then. Now get out of the way so I could get out of here. "
"And honestly I liked that kiss." You continued determined to see him flustered again. "Your lips were soft and I bet my ass you're a great kisser. I rate you 10/10 would do it again."
With a glare he looked at you straight in the eyes, "So do it pussy." Then went ahead before you could see the red settling on his face.
"I- Wh- Excuse me- Wh- Huh? K-Ken- Kenma!!" You squeaked as you chased after him.
"I said what I said."
You finally caught up to him when he was about to climb the stairs towards the stage. Luckily(?) you also have to go up with him.
"Ehh... Where's the flustered Kenma? I wanted to see you all blushy and panicked. You looked so adorable. I don't want hot daddy Dom Kenma. I want cute baby sub Kenma..."
As he was halfway up the stairs your height gap grew and he was way over you. He just looked down on you, leaning closer the gap barely existent he smirked.
"Too bad." Then turned away.
There were a handful of people who saw the scene. Which made you more embarrassed. Holy shit you acted all alpha online only to be dominated by a hermit named Kozume Kenma.
Boy were you happy. You'd happily submit to him.
"Let us all welcome the two people who made the game possible! YN LN and Kozume Kenma!!"
You might be confused why you two were the ones going and why you were introduced like that.
As you are the creator of Puri-Puri you of course are the reason why this game existed.
But Kenma came here as he's the biggest investor, the face of the game and no one else wanted to go. So yeah...
As you two came up the stage you were just wishing the blush from the scene a few moments ago. The cameras flashed and claps were heard.
"Shit the media is here..." You mumbled.
"Your surprised, why?" Kenma gave you an amused and disappointed look. No idea how he managed to do that but he did.
"Shut the fuck up. I just got a feeling the questions won't be about the game thanks to the media."
"So you do think sometimes..."
"You want me to hit you?"
A clearing of throat behind you stopped your argument. It was Akaashi handing you both microphones to be clipped on you [I'm sorry I dont know what they're called] .
"Good luck, don't do and say anything stupid. And remember this is the release of PPM's demo." He reminded and got off the stage.
"Good evening to you all! I hope you've been having a great time!" I started.
"We'd like to thank you again for attending the release of PPM's demo."
"Now of course the game is yet to be played but from the trailer that was shown, I hope you had enjoyed it since the game is going to be much better than the trailer!"
"I'm sure you all must've questions as well. That's why Me and your idi-- dear author will answer."
"You definitely were about to call me idiot." You frowned at him.
He smirked and shrugged. "I have not a slightest idea what you mean."
"You're the worst."
Ignoring you... Again. He motioned at one of the reporters to probably ask their question.
"Ms. LN, as the initial plot of the Puri-Puri Magika is about [REDACTED], and the trailer we saw have quite a large difference from one another only having the universe in similarty. Is it just the universe of the similar one to the manga? "
"Of course the plot would be different. It disappoints me quite a bit that none of you realized how they're connected aside from the universe. Well, I don't really want to spoil you but if you actually read the Manga and saw the trailer," You gave a proud smirk. "Everyone that was a fan of PPM in the team were ecstatic. They were all just-" You mimicked a mind blown. "They were so excited about the game and a those."
"Thank you Ms. LN."
"Next please."
"Mr. Kozume," the next one called. "You were neither a fan of YN, nor PPM, why did you decide to not only beta test the game but sponsor and invest big sum of money on the game."
"We--"
"No wait ! I want to answer some of those questions!" You cut off cackling. "The one about him investing and him beta testing! It's actually an annoying and Hella funny story."
"No I was a--"
"Shut up you'll probably lie."
"Shut up." Kenma now had his ears red. "Don't you--"
"He was the biggest asshole back then!"
"Stop talking."
"He fucking beta tested despite not knowing shit about PPM because it was the biggest game. And he just banwagoned  on it like a bitch he was."
"I did not. I had some clues about you Manga."
"You did not know shit about PPM cut yo bullshit. You didn't even know who the MC was!"
"Shut up."
"That's why he beta tested! Now the reason why he invested is really hilarious!"
"I really hate this story..."
"This was the reason why Kenma became Bae too! We didn't know shit about how to contact Kenma, we only had his email address and his social media. Keep that in mind. "
"So since he didn't know shit about PPM he really couldn't care about the plot and just looked for bugs and shit. He wasn't even aware of the bugs in the plot since he didn't know which what was supposed to be part of the plot and not. This bitch ass decided there wasn't any bugs anymore so we went with that. But then we had to play it and saw a shit ton of bugs."
"I said there were some bugs don't make me seems so stupid."
"You didn't even inform us about the glitch at the time skip part! That could've ruined the entire thing! Anywayz, so we had to code the game again. So we emailed him that there were way too many bugs other than what he told us so the next testing would be later. But the asshole never replied. And since I was the one entasked to guide this bitch ass, I  had to flood his email! And he didn't respond! Not once! It had been DAYS! I send him at least 20 emails everyday! I have up on the 3-4th day and DMed him on Twitter."
"I really hate this part."
"No. No. This is the best part. Do y'all remember that one trending #KodzuGone started by Tenma? It's because, this asshole never responded to our emails so I DMed him all the shit important shit in the emails. Then this bitch fucking blocked me! I fucking rante to Tenma and he canceled Kenma like he deserved to! I was panicking about it since Mr. Suzumiya told me that Kenma could be a potential investor if he wanted. And I needed cash... "
"Do not call me that publicly. You are disgusting."
"He went full sugar daddy on me!" You cackled. "His entire squad had betrayed him! They were canceling him so he just fucking slid into my DMs apologizing about the shit he did and I told him, bitch I'm coming over there and see you play this fucking game or I will not stop this canceling and make it worse. So he was forced to telll me his address and I'm not sure if yall saw the live but it was hot shit. The next day he bought all the copies of PPM at this one store and gave them to me and then he invested shit ton of money on my on going works, bought me a new tablet, paid my Keiji bills, and many other shit. Yall would die to have him as sugar daddy I'm telling you. Ya don't even have to give him sugar for the treats. "
"That was the biggest mistake I made."
"Awwe, but thanks to that we're closer than ever. "
"Exactly my point."
"Thank you for answering Ms. LN."
"I hate you so much." Kenma sighed pinching the bridge of his nose.
"No you don't. Admit it you love me."
"I really don't. Next question please."
"A-Ah, my initial question was actually answered in the previous question. It about your live. Now my question is, Ms LN and Mr. Kozume, is your relationship really a platonic one or a romantic one? "
"Okay, babe," You chuckled. "my man won't even let me breathe the same air he does. Ya think we're dating?"
"Well your right."
"What?"
"Excuse me?"
"Huh?! " You exclaimed a little louder than you thought since the mic made a loud noise.
"The relationship we have is both platonic and romantic. As labels aren't placed we share a romantic relationship." Kenma smirked.
You looked at him and the crowd with a clear eminent blush. "I-I I- Wh-"
Pulling you closer to him and turning around so the crowd won't see you both. He lowered the mic to prevent them from hearing.
"I wanted to see you all blushy and panicked . You look adorable." He whispered to your ear before facing the crowd again who were now going crazy over what Kenma had just confirmed.
"Y-You're an asshole..."
"Yeah, an asshole who..." lowering his mic again he leaned to your ear. "Still has your favorite onsie at his place. You really shouldn't have left it at my place. I'm so tempted to burn it."
"You leave my onsie alone! I will drown your consoles."
"With that threat, you're suddenly stripped of your house visit privileges."
"W-Why would you say we're dating?!"
"I didn't. I just said we both share a romantic and platonic relationship with no labels. I technically didn't lie too."
"Why did you do this?"
"Aside from wanting to see you all flustered? I'm probably drunk." Kenma smiled and turned to the crowd again. "Next question please."
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Previous | Masterlist | Next
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I'm sorry lately there's been to many words and less pictures it's just that... Idk
Lol I'm sorry this was supposed to be smau but there's been too many words
Ooc Kenma is shit so I made him drunk
-kookie-doughs
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Taglist?
@gayer-than-the-gayest-gay @synx-ed @normalisthenewnorm @0majuh0 @leachann @nikanikabitch @almondeupeach @immxnty @mer-majesty @yamayoomi @simpingoveranime-men @lostmarimoismyhubby @mariishat @just-snog-already
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sassyhobbits · 4 years ago
Text
Tinder Au pt 2
yall ask, i deliver. Enjoy!
part 1
~~~
When Rowan’s Tinder match had ended up being his new coworker, he had expected a few tense days of awkwardness that they would eventually work through. He then hoped for them to become friends, or at least build a kind of casual, professional relationship. Eventually, the entire thing would have been a funny memory they would be able to laugh at in the future.
He hadn’t expected that she would end up driving him up the fucking wall.
Aelin was loud and opinionated. In the short month and a half she had been at the gym, she had practically taken over, moving through the facility like wildfire. All of the members adored her, as did the staff. Even Lorcan, who only really liked the nutritionist, Elide, managed to tolerate Aelin.
Maybe what pissed him off the most was the fact that she barely paid him a second glance. Aelin talked to everyone, knew all their names and facts about them, but almost never spoke to him. When he had called off the date and put some professional distance between them, Rowan didn’t expect her to take it as she had. He had liked her enough when they chatted, he didn’t want to cut off ties completely.
Maybe he was extra pissed off because of how people flocked to her, of how she soaked up the attention. She was a beautiful girl, afterall. She smiled and flirted here and there, but none of that attention went towards Rowan.
Maybe
 maybe he was just pissed because he had missed out on the opportunity to be the one she smiled at like that.
Regardless of why, it didn’t change the fact that he was pissed. Extra pissed this morning, actually. He had reached out towards a usual client of his, wondering when he wanted to train again, only to find out that he had started training with Aelin.
Rowan had been clenching his jaw all morning, nearly on the verge of breaking a tooth, when he spotted her at the front desk, handing a coffee to Lysandra. He strode towards her, slamming his clipboard down on the marble, and bit out, “Quit stealing my fucking clients, Galathynius!”
Aelin barely reacted to his fury, only raising a brow and taking a sip from her coffee. “Good morning to you too, Rowan.”
He narrowed her eyes. “I’m serious. This is the second client this week. Why?”
“To begin with, I’m not stealing them. They’re coming willingly to me.” Aelin leaned her weight against the desk. “If you’re wondering why they’re coming to me
 one, my ass looks great in leggings. Two, I do this thing called smiling. People tend to like it when you smile instead of scowling like you love to do.”
Rowan scowled. “Why do you even work here? Don’t you make money from your stupid Instagram?”
Apparently, Aelin had a solid following on Instagram. His coworker, Fenrys, had shown him a few days after she had started. Fenrys had become instantly enamoured with Aelin and her Instagram. It was full of pictures of Aelin showing off her body that she had worked so hard for, fitness tips, pictures of her and her friends, tasteful selfies. Rowan had spent more time than he cared to admit scrolling through it once he got home that evening. Gods, she was a beautiful girl.
Aelin rolled her eyes. “Do you know how to make money through Instagram? Running ads. And the only people who want me to run their ads are the fake-detox teas that are just diuretics. So, besides the money I get here and there from sponsoring some leggings, I do need an actual job to pay my rent. But don’t worry. Remelle hates me, so she’ll pay yours.”
Rowan’s scowl only deepened at the mention of the client he had been training for the past few months. Remelle only trained with him because she was attracted to him. The only reason he hadn’t told her to fuck off was beacuse her frequent sessions did help pay for his groceries. And she did absolutely despise Aelin because of the attention she received from the other males in the gym and her popularity online, so she wouldn’t be going to her for training.
Rowan heard footsteps approach from behind, felt someone slap his shoulder in greeting.
“You look like you woke up with a stick up your ass this morning, Whitethorn,” Fenrys said as a form of hello.
“He doesn’t look like that everyday?” Aelin asked, raising a brow. Lysandra at least tried to hide her laugh behind her hand. She handed Fenrys a coffee from the drink carrier she had brought.
“You working tomorrow?” Fenrys asked her, completely oblivious to the argument he just interrupted.
“Nope.”
“You wanna hit legs with me?”
“Only if you buy lunch after.”
“Deal.”
Rowan ground his teeth again at the exchange. He, unfortunately, worked tomorrow and would get the pleasure of watching them dick around together while he had to work. Not to mention, Remelle was his client tomorrow, so he would also get to listen to her make passive aggressive comments about Aelin the entire session.
“Well, if all you fine people would excuse me, I have a client,” Aelin announced, pushing away from the desk. As she brushed past him, she placed a hand on Rowan’s shoulder. “Do try and stay busy. I know you don’t have a full schedule today.”
Rowan glared at her. Brat.
Her brows flickered up. And proud.
With that, she dropped her hand and strode away.
The place her hand had been burned like a brand.


The next day, Rowan was struggling to focus on his session. Remelle was being her normal
 charming self as he walked her through a few new exercises. Unfortunately for him, Aelin was working out only a few feet away and she was
 distracting, to say the least.
When she was working, Aelin wore the standard quarter-zip and plain leggings. But, when she came to workout on her days off, she sported a much more varied wardrobe. Today, she wore a matching legging and sports bra set in a deep green. It was flattering, and fit her in all the right places. Her golden hair was swept out of her face in a high ponytail that swung around animatedly as she moved. She tossed her head back in a laugh at something Fenrys had said.
Rowan watched as she adjusted the weight on the bar, positioning herself below it, and doing a set of lunges. Her form was perfect, of course, face pinched in concentration. It was an impressive amount of weight to be fair.  
She finished her set, reracking the weights and wiping her brows with a towel. Rowan’s eyes ran up and down her body, her golden-tan skin, toned stomach, strong legs and shaped ass. It was no wonder why she had so many followers, why so many people looked to her for advice.
“Rowan!”
Rowan blinked, realizing he had been lost in his own thoughts. Or, lost in Aelin, rather. He hadn’t noticed that Remelle had been trying to get his attention.
“Sorry, what?”
Remelle huffed out a breath, blowing a strand of her pale blonde-hair out of her eyes. “Am I doing this right?”
Rowan refrained from rolling his eyes as Remelle did the move wrong, no doubt intentionally. It was a game she liked to play, doing an exercise wrong to get Rowan to touch her to get it right. He was quickly growing tired of it.
“Move your feet a bit closer together.”
Remelle huffed again, clearly upset that her plan didn’t work. She finished the exercise before straightening and planting her hands on her hips. “So, you busy later tonight?”
Rowan lowered his brows. “Why?”
“I was wondering if you wanted to get dinner together.”
Rowan hesitated, unsure of how to proceed. It was always awkward trying to turn down a client, something that Lysandra had often griped about. When you worked customer service, it made rejection that much harder. What the fuck was he supposed to say that wouldn’t piss her off enough to complain to Lorcan?
Remelle raised a brow at his prolonged silence.
Rowan’s savior came dressed in Lululemon.
“Hey,” Aelin greeted breathily, placing her hand on his back. “Are we still getting dinner tonight?”
He had to struggle to keep his confusion to himself. They had made no such plans, and Aelin was touching him so casually after barely looking his way for a month. Rowan glanced down at her questioning, but the look on her face only seemed to say, Go along with it, buzzard.
“Yeah, of course.”
Remelle pressed her lips into a tight line. “Oh. I didn’t know that you two were together.”
“Yeah,” Aelin nodded, cocking her head to the side and holding out a hand. “I don’t think we’ve met before. Rebecca, isn’t it?”
Aelin knew damn well who Remelle was, even if they hadn’t been formally introduced. It made her purposeful butchering of her name even more entertaining. Rowan struggled to hold back the bark of laughter he wanted to release.
“Remelle,” she ground out, shaking Aelin’s hand once and dropping it so fast one would think it burned her. Remelle picked up her phone and glanced at the time. “Well, it looks like our session is up. I’ll see you next week.”
With that, Remelle swept away down the hall, leaving them alone. Once she was far enough away, Aelin took a step back.
“You owe me, Rowan Whitethorn.”
“I didn’t ask you to do that.”
“No, but you looked so lost and uncomfortable that I took pity.” Aelin gave a tiny shrug. “Besides, at least she didn’t cancel on you next week. She probably thinks she can get you to leave me. Hell, maybe she’ll book more sessions now. So
 you’re welcome.”
“You’re impossible.”
“Maybe I am,” Aelin said, walking back towards where Fenrys stood to finish her workout. “And yet
 you still owe me. Be ready.”
She didn’t even give him a chance to say something snappy back before she turned her back and strode away.
God gods was she infuriating. And yet Rowan knew he would keep coming back for more.  
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sevenkittensinatrenchcoat · 3 years ago
Text
Saw My Mutuals Doing a Hunger Games
So, I also messed around with the Hunger Games Simulator. I called it Macavity’s Jellicle Choice. Macavity managed to defeat Old Deuteronomy and decided that the next cat to ascend to the Heaviside Layer as to survive a Hunger Games. 23 cats just die. The 24th gets reborn.
I am so terrible with the simulator that I didn’t even have images for the characters, so I didn’t take many screenshots. Instead, I took notes of what happened.
We’ll begin at the end:
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This is the only screenshot you’re getting. All of the nicknames I used are very stupid.
Here are the notes I took as I played this thing:
Content Warning: It’s a Hunger Games. Violence and Death. Also featuring my dark sense of humor.
Bloodbath
Pouncival and Plato fought over a bag, but Pouncival was too small to win that fight and ran away.
Tantomile Inventory: Shield x1
Jellylorum managed to scare Tugger away from the Cornucopia. Nobody was surprised by this.
Victoria Inventory: Bombs x5
Bombalurina Inventory: Shield x1
Munkustrap has made the Cornucopia into his base.
Rumpleteazer, Asparagus, and Grizabella got into a fight. I assume it must’ve been some sort of Emotional Ballad Competition, because Grizabella was victorious.
Etcetera Inventory: Canteen x1
Mungojerrie is hiding in the Cornucopia. Munkustrap knows this and is allowing it.
Day 1:
After all that “excitement” (The Bloodbath wasn’t that bloody tbh), there’s still much to be done.
George and Coricopat got into a fight, but it was just practice and they’re fine. George won, btw.
Pouncival has already managed to hurt himself will foraging for food.
Jemima Inventory: Hatchet x1 (The baby has plenty of sponsors, I assume.)
Bombalurina caught some fish, but that’s not that exciting.
Grizabella murdered Alonzo with a trident. I’m starting to become concerned by how good she is at killing people.
Tantomile just fell in a lake and drowned. Quite the anticlimax.
Allience! Electra, Cassandra, and Mistoffelees are on the prowl!
Tumblebrutus managed to scare Tugger into running away. I think “run away” is Tugger’s strategy at this point.
Munkustrap Inventory: Nameless Fruit x3
Jellylorum Inventory: Spear x1 (She made it herself. All those years of teaching kids crafts have paid off.)
Victoria beat Mungojerrie in a fight, but let him go because this was either a practice round or the announcer for the family-friendly TV station that airs The Hunger Games just claimed they were “fighting” in the bushes.
Etcetera Inventory: Canteen x1, Food Item x1 (Thank you, sponsor! 
Okay, it was me.)
Mass Funeral 1:
RIP Rumpleteazer. (Lean Lynx) Her ballad wasn’t angst enough.
RIP Asparagus. (No Fuss 2 Pronounce) He just wanted to play Growltiger.
RIP Alonzo. (True Himbo) That was kind of pathetic.
RIP Tantomile. (She Psych) Your death was so boring.
Night 1:
Serial Killer Grizabella got Electra.
Plato became Enemy Number 1 for some unknown reason and he was hunted down by Coricopat, Tumblebrutus, Tugger, Jenny, and Munkustrap.
Remember how Pouncival injured himself? He got pricked with tiny thorns and bled out a few hours later.
Etcetera just screamed for help AND IF SOMEONE DOESN’T HELP HER I SWEAR TO GOD-
Some strange archery accident involved Victoria, Skimble, and Cassandra occurred. Cassandra’s dead now.
Jellylorum isn’t dead, but she’s unconscious, so someone should really look into that.
Misto and Jemima are snuggling!
Bombalurina stabbed George and left him to die. A bit harsh.
Demeter and Mungojerrie have been spotted holding hands. These two Macavity survivors have turned to each other for emotional support.
Day 2:
Allience! Jerrie, Victoria, Coricopat, Misto, and Munkustrap are on the prowl!
Serial Killer Grizabella is stalking Jemima! Luckily, she hasn’t got a chance to kill her.
Skimble stabbed Tugger.
Etcetera has found her mom. Jellylorum has kept her safe for the day.
Demeter Inventory: First Aid Kit x1 (From a sponsor)
Jennyanydots Inventory: First Aid Kit x1 (From a sponsor, cleverly giving medical supplies to someone who might be able to help everyone. Hopefully, no more kittens will end up like Pouncival.)
Mass Funeral 2:
RIP Electra (Book and Bell): She didn’t expect Grizabella to go so insane so quickly.
RIP Plato (Not Too Big): He was played by the same actor as Macavity, so maybe the mob got mixed up.
RIP Pouncival (Can Do Handstand): He died from a boo-boo.
RIP Cassandra (Pharaohs’s Girl): I’m still not sure wtf just happened.
RIP George (Could Be Admetus): I almost completely forgot about him, but the audience will remember.
RIP Tugger (Tugs): Skimble took their rivalry too far.
So, that was a massacre

Night 2:
Coricopat just randomly died from thirst. Remember that Tantomile drowned. One twin died from too little water, and the other from too much.
Victoria is having nightmares. Just thought you should know.
Jerrie, Skimble, Grizabella, and Demeter have set up camp together. After everything that’s happened, sharing a camp with Grizabella sounds like a terrible idea, but everyone’s under a lost of stress and not thinking clearly.
Misto has built a shelter and Jenny is allowed inside. Good choice of ally.
Jemima tried to sing herself to sleep. Poor baby

Munk killed Jelly with a poison dart. It was quite brutal. I don’t think he meant it that way, but the game only ends after most of them are dead.
Bombalurina has begun to question her sanity. I think this question applies to nearly everyone.
Etcetera, after possibly witnessing Munk kill Jelly, appears to have snapped. She hacked Tumblebrutus to pieces with a weapon that I didn’t even know she had.
Day 3:
Stalking Jemima was a bad choice. Serial Killer Grizabella now as a sprained ankle.
Allience! Victoria, Jenny, Misto, and Jerrie are on the prowl!
Munk died from thirst, and possibly from guilt.
Bomba and Skimble are friends for today.
Etcetera Inventory: Food Item x1 (Sponsor. I had to do something)
Mass Funeral 3:
RIP Coricopat (He Psych): His death matched up with his twin’s.
RIP Jellylorum (Bitches Be Jelly): That was really fucked up.
RIP Tumblebrutus (Fliptastic): He was probably in the wrong place at the wrong time.
RIP Munkustrap (Fearless Leader): At the end of the day, he couldn’t kill his family.
Night 3:
Etcetera is gazing at the stars, looking for a Dead Parent-Shaped Constellation.
Victoria managed to defeat Serial Killer Grizabella, but she let her go.
Jerrie and Jemima are snuggling! I think he might’ve adopted her. Normally, that would be Skimble’s job, but

Demeter found those poison darts Munk was using and killed Skimble with one of them.
Meanwhile, because everyone’s parents are dying tonight, Misto shot Jenny. I think he might’ve planned it. The Hunger Games brings out the worst in everybody, sooner or later.
Feast!
Smart Cats Who Stayed the Fuck Out of It: Mistoffelees and Demeter
Bomba just grabbed some food and ran for it, so she’s also pretty smart.
Etcetera’s nervous breakdown continues. She killed Victoria in an ambush, not caring who she was killing at this point.
Serial Killer Grizabella managed to behave when she ran into Jerrie and Jemima. They grabbed their stuff and left.
Day 4:
Misto is ready to die, but Jemima won’t kill him and Jerrie went out to hunt, so he’s not there to do it for her.
Grizabella died of dysentery. This isn’t even a joke.
EVENT: Tsunami (Later to be Dubbed “The Tsunami of Tears”)
Survivors: Mistoffelees, Mungojerrie, and Demeter
Little Etcetera got swept away. Bomba and Jemima both sort of crashed into each other, leaving them stunned for long enough to drown.
We just lost all of our kittens :,(
Mass Funeral 4:
RIP Jennyanydots (Mouse Mother): Misto betrayed her, but she probably didn’t mind.
RIP Skimbleshanks (Railway Cat): I’d like to propose a ban on poison darts.
RIP Victoria (Little White Cat): Another kitten in the wrong place at the wrong time.
RIP Grizabella (Cat Who Sings Memory): She died of dysentery.
RIP Etcetera (Little Tiger Cub): *wails*
RIP Bombalurina (Whittington’s Friend): She played very pragmatically, but lost from last-minute bad luck.
RIP Jemima (Sillababy): *wails louder*
Night 4:
After all the bullshit they’ve been through, the three survivors just decide to duel each other to the death now. Misto defeats Jerrie and Demeter. None of them were trying very hard.
Anyway, Mistoffelees won. I didn’t rig this so my favorite would win. I don’t know how one rigs a Hunger Games Simulator. I would’ve preferred to save a kitten.
If it isn’t obvious by now:
Mean Minx: Mungojerrie
Leading Lady: Demeter
Pied Piper’s Assistant: Mistoffelees
So, that’s what I did on this fine Tuesday morning.
Hunger Games Idea Inspired by: @fluffytuffles and @0zzysaurus​
I didn’t use the same template, but I wouldn’t have thought to do the thing if my mutuals didn’t start it.
As for the backstory I set up before hand, Mistoffelees magically kicked Macavity’s ass and rescued Old Deuteronomy. They figured out that it was all a magical nightmare Macavity had sent to torment the tribe. Misto’s magic allowed him to fight the nightmare for the longest. Demeter and Jerrie and also built up some Macavity resistance over time. Everyone who came close to winning had slightly higher Macavity resistance for one reason or another.
Anyway, they all woke up from the nightmare and everyone was actually fine.
The End
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chayacat · 4 years ago
Text
Devil’s Sweet Star (24)
Fandom: Dead by Daylight
Ghostface x Female Reader  
Rated M for Violence, Language and Smut  
***
Pride. They say pride can be a nasty flaw. But deep down, is that really the case? Pride is pretty positive in itself. You feel pride when you succeed in something, when you spend a stage of your life that everyone and even you thought impossible. The pride of your parents when you do something good is proof of that. When you help people, you feel a certain pride in being able to be useful to society. When you graduate, you're proud of it! When you create a garment, an object, a cake or a dish, you're proud of it! So why is pride a flaw?
Well actually... It happens when you do something bad. Do you know why? Because pride brings bragging. When you're a good person, you don't have to tell everyone about all the feats you accomplish, some of these feats, you keep them to yourself, like a shadow hero. But when you are a "bad" person, someone who spends more time hurting around him than helping others, pride invades you and you feel compelled to brag about it. Of course, you're lying, you're changing reality to make you look like a hero. But everyone quickly understands that you're a crook.
But when you're an assassin like Danny, even if pride invades you, you have to contain yourself. Because if you brag about your murders.... you end up in jail. It makes sense, you still don't think you're being congratulated for a crime anyway... But our national Danny knows how to master himself. He feels proud of his "masterpieces" but is not going to brag to everyone that he is Ghostface, the murderer, the star of Roseville.
But if he could be proud... it's scaring you. More, to have exceeded a new limit with you. How proud would he have been to be the first and last to steal your virginity. To hear your moans, to hear your voice shouting his name, asking him to continue. For after falling asleep in his arms and him, looking at you, breathless, but conquered. But for now, he had to focus on his work. But he was proud, proud to see Wilhelm's head when he came across McKellan's corpse, Danny's ultimate masterpiece. For now.
“Did he go that far? Seriously?” asks Melina with some kind of disgust.  
“Just thinking about it, I want to vomit. But unfortunately, yes. You would have seen how much he slaughtered him. Even Wilhelm went out for a few minutes to avoid spitting his guts.” responds Mattew with a grimace on the corner of the face.  
“I admit that there... he has outdone himself. I've seen massacres made by Ghostface but this one... it’s a bloody masterpiece.” Said Danny holding a smile. “For once, Wilhelm was... not displeased to see me. On the other hand, he did not appreciate that I snoop everywhere. I have to understand what happened to write my article. And to think that people wanted Hoggins to die... Well, they'll have McKellan's death in the papers.”
“Well, it's Wilhelm... He always wants to be alone at the crime scene. He and the boss have argued several times about this. But the boss has always found a valid reason to shut his mouth.” replied Melina.
Mr. Hembrook arrived at the same time and stopped at the level of our three reporters, coffee in hand. This man always exuded a certain class no matter what outfit he was wearing.
“it's about me here... my ears are whistling.” He said, taking a sip.  
“They were telling how you're shitting Wilhelm back. You don't have to miss him every time.” said Mattew.
“Wilhelm is not a bad guy... he wants to do his job seriously and not let a clue escape. But his problem is that he always wants to do everything, all by himself and he doesn't appreciate the company of others, especially journalists. If he agreed to share his information and cooperated with us, it would go faster. Besides, you two, did you find anything on the spot?”
“Well, it looks like Ghostface went through the window... there is no broken glass or door hooking. He could not reach the window through the front of the villa. There are far too many guards... but from the back....” started Mattew.  
“From the back, there are only two guards to watch the garden. He could easily have gone through this. According to the guards, McKellan always listens to music in his office for about an hour. Ghostface had to attack him at that time. The music covered McKellan's screams. He left quickly to avoid being caught by the guards.” continues Danny.  
“It seems consistent... It seems very consistent even! Traces of a struggle?” replied Hembrook.
“No. McKellan had to be knocked out and tied to the chair where he was found. When you see what he did... he must have enjoyed it.” respond Danny holding another smile. Of course, he takes pleasure of it.  
“You've got enough to write a good article, my little Jed. With a murder like that... We're going to have enough to do for months! With the scandal over Hoggins... it's the bouquet.”  
“Of course, Sir. I...”
“I wonder... if it's not a setup. Hoggins and McKellan had been in conflict since that scandal. Hoggins accused McKellan of selling the wick on their business. I think that... that it is an assassination. And that he's paying Ghostface to kill McKellan.” said Melina.
Danny froze on the spot. Ghostface play mercenaries? Certainly not! He will never go down to that level. That would be unworthy of him! If he didn't like Melina, she would have been his next victim. But she cannot know what happened and all this is the result of her reflection. With all the elements she has, it’s easy to come to this conclusion.
“Impossible. It's not Ghostface-style to play mercenaries or hitmen for someone. Why would he do it now?” Asks Mattew.
“Mattew is right, it's not in his habits. And I don't think it will ever be. But the idea of a commissioned assassination cannot be ruled out. Hoggins is rich. He could very well have paid someone to kill McKellan. And made it all up to put it on Ghostface's account.” Fit Danny.  
“A commissioned assassination? It's a trail to explore. You should go talk to Wilhelm. To see what he thinks about that.” said Hembrook before leaving for his office.
Danny looked at Melina and Mattew before getting up, taking his bag and heading with his two colleagues to his van. The three got into the vehicle and set off for the police station. Definitely he will have met Wilhelm often lately. Too often to his liking. Unfortunately, it has to be. Jed has no problem with him. But Danny couldn't stand him.
“You should take a subscription to the Roseville police station. I am sure that on the tenth visit, you will have the right to a one-on-one dinner with Wilhelm.” said Mattew with a sneaky smile.
“I'll give it to you then... I'm not really attracted to that fat ass.” said Danny before laughing.  
Mattew grimaced and Melina chuckled. Danny parked and the three of them got out of the vehicle and entered the police station. As they went to the reception to ask to see Wilhelm, the latter was just talking to a policeman. When he saw the trio, he sighed.
“Oh no, it's not true... I was cursed for you to stick me so much Olsen? We met yesterday and I have to see your snooping face again today?” Wilhelm said.  
“I want to say that I have the same curse Wilhelm. But it’s our boss who sends us.” respond Danny with a smile.  
“That old Hembrook monkey? And why will he send you to see me except to piss me off with Olsen?”
“Information and a hypothesis that might interest you. If you give us a few minutes of your precious time.”
Wilhelm seemed to think for a few minutes, before sighing and beckoning them to follow him into his office. Once all this beautiful people settled, Danny, of course, in front of Wilhelm, they tell everything they had concluded as well as the hypothesis of the sponsored murder. The latter listened attentively and drank a sip of coffee before speaking.
“You know this is a serious accusation you are making? It's not just anyone, it's one of the most influential men on the market. Also, explain to me why he would have murdered his partner, if indeed it’s proven that he and McKellan were doing what is written in the press articles.” said Wilhelm.  
“That's the explanation, Wilhelm. The article is a sufficient evidence and motive to have him murdered. Hoggins accused McKellan of throwing everything away. If McKellan disappears... more by camouflaged as an umpteenth murder of Ghostface ...Hoggins wins all. Moreover, there is no evidence that he would not have sunk McKellan once all the competitors were eliminated.” said Danny.  
“That's not wrong Olsen... That's not wrong. But it's a big fish. Even if I think the same as you for once, if I have no proof of his involvement ... I couldn't get him arrested. And if he hired someone and made this happen to a Ghostface murder, the REAL Ghostface might not appreciate being robbed of his work.”
“Maybe we could, I don’t know... consider cooperating for once? by exchanging our information between us we can do the whole thing on this story.” Said Melina.
Wilhelm and Danny looked at each other, grimacing. The prospect of having to work together doesn't please Danny in any of the world. But he has no choice, if he wants to direct suspicions on Hoggins, as he planned in his murder plan, he must cooperate with his worst enemy. But the day he can kill him... Believe me, Danny's going to have fun. The inspector got up, and beckoned them to follow them. They all arrived in a meeting room where there was already a team that was handling the case.
“Guys, this is the team of journalists from the Roseville Gazette. They will work with us, so that with all the information we find each other, we can gather them and solve the murder of Horace McKellan. They have information and a lead that we need to exploit.” said Wilhelm before heading to the dashboard.
The whole group worked together all day, getting up to date on all the information they did have so far. Danny quietly observed everyone. All those idiots looking for clues and evidence. And they are also responsible for his murders? What a bunch of idiots. If they knew that Ghostface was here, in the same room as them... That would be ironic. It's ironic, actually.
At the end of the day, everyone went home. Danny was tired but couldn't help but smile when he saw all these idiots. His plan worked perfectly, they are so manipulable, he will quickly manage to turn them to Hoggins and when he will be suspected of murder... That's where Danny's going to kill him. You will tell me it's silly in this case to have him accused. But don't worry, Danny has it all planned out. Absolutely everything.
He dropped Mattew and Melina in the newspaper parking lot so they could drive home. Then he went home. Previously, he stopped by the Florist next to your café, to buy you a beautiful bouquet of flowers. what? Danny knows how to be nice when he wants to. Sometimes he wants to give presents. Especially for his beautiful angel. He went up to your apartment and knocked on the door. When you open the latter, Danny didn't have time to say anything, that you would jump into his arms, before kissing him.
“I see, you missed me. Here. It's for you.” He said before laughing and giving you the bouquet.
“More than you could imagine. How was your day?” you ask by taking the bouquet.
“We can say that it was... full of twists and turns.” respond Danny before telling the whole day.
“Poor you. I wish you good luck. You must be exhausted.”
“A little. I think for once I'm going to eat and go to bed straight. Although I would have liked to spend time with you...” replied Danny before he saw that you were slightly stressed. He already knows why. “Are you Okay?”
“Oh yeah! Just...a little tired too...Don’t worry.” You respond.  
“I'll let you rest then... Sleep well, see you tomorrow.”
Danny kissed you before returning to his apartment, put down his belongings, took off his glasses and made himself food. He thought back to his day, everything was going according to plan. It must continue until it reaches apotheosis. And when it happens... He will still slip through the cracks.
He brushed his teeth, read a little and went to bed after half an hour. He looked at the thoughtful ceiling. Then a smile came to his lips, thinking of Wilhelm. If he knew he was working with Ghostface... he would shoot himself, that's for sure. Just like the entire police station for that matter. Knowing that he had infiltrated the police and that until the completion of his plan, he would work with them...
It made him smile greatly. He fell asleep with this smile and these thoughts.
Having infiltrated the enemy without being unmasked...
That's what made him proud.
***
(I'm officially starting my driving lessons May, 18Th. If I have to describe my mind right now...I’ll say I'm freaking out so hard that my heart will explode or to get out of my chest. Well, I’ve got time before hell begins! XD Oh by the way, from May 5th to May 7th I’ll go see my best friend, so chapter 26, which will be from Danny's point of view will probably come out late or even the week after! This will give the new ones the opportunity to read the chapters that have come out so far! Have a great weekend to you all! See ya!)
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phantomato · 3 years ago
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Uber
Nottmort (Tom Riddle/Nott Sr.), Modern Muggle AU, ~2k words
Thanks to @yletylyf for kicking around this idea! Tom drives an Uber in the Bay Area. Thoros & co need a ride.
—
Abraxas and Orion are bickering over luggage in the background when your Uber pulls up. Black, of course, so it’s a Mercedes that will smell a little too much like leather cleaner when you get in, but none of you have ever ridden in an UberX or, god forbid, an Uber Pool, and you’re not about to start.
Your colleagues—never forget, you are not friends, no matter how much time you spend with them—slide into the back seat before you can even begin to help load bags into the trunk. You’re left alone with the driver, and though he offers to help, you haven’t let yourself sink that low as to make this man pile all of your shit in his car while you sit around and watch. And anyway, it feels like the polite thing to do. More than Abraxas or Orion, you’ve been raised to be polite.
So you fold yourself into the front passenger seat, too kind to push the seat all the way back and give yourself the leg room you need even if Orion, behind you, is just 5’8 to your 6’3, and smile at the driver as he confirms your destination.
He’s pretty. You’ve been in a lot of Ubers and you’ve never seen a driver this pretty. Is that classist?, you wonder to yourself, remembering something you read in Vox the other day. Probably. Nevertheless, you’re taken by the curve of his mouth, the sweep of his dark hair, and you throw a smirk over your shoulder at Abraxas who you know must have also noticed.
“Traffic to SFO will be busy,” he says regretfully, and you roll your eyes. Orion refuses to take the early morning flights, unwilling to wake at 3 AM, and you’re always stuck with these long, miserable Uber rides down from the city to the airport. “And Terminal 2—right in the middle of it. There’s construction around those doors, if you haven’t been there—”
“We know,” Orion butts in rudely, shutting up your driver for the few minutes it takes to get out of your neighborhood.
You use those few minutes to swipe through your phone. Email—nothing important. Messages—you clear the notifications. Your Instagram is alight with people reposting the same infographic about voting rights and you make a mental note to kick some money to that non-profit that’s been all over Twitter lately. You close out apps and end up back at Uber, watching your car’s laggy progress through the San Francisco streets. Your driver’s name is Tom, the app informs you. It’s a nice name.
You clear the side streets and Tom offers amenities. “If you want any water, there are bottles in the cooler between the seats,” he calls back to Abraxas and Orion, “and mints in the cup holder. You can adjust the air conditioning if you like, and there’s a charging cable attached to the back of my seat if you need it. Would you like to choose any music?”
“No,” Abraxas says, and whether he means the music or the entire spiel doesn’t really matter, given his withering tone. You look back at him, trying to convey ‘Be nice’ with just your eyebrows, but Abraxas is fussing with his hair and ignoring you.
Tom’s one of the chipper ones, it turns out, because he takes the rejection in stride and shifts to the dreaded personal conversation. “What do you all do for a living?”
“Ah, we invest in companies, mostly start-ups,” you say, trying to avoid—
“Venture capitalists!” Tom guesses, and he’s right but you hate the term and its connotations. So what if you are all white men whose family money has bankrolled tech speculation? It’s what anyone with half a brain would do. You donate, you read the liberal news—at least, you think that’s true for all of you, though Orion was friends with that Republican mayoral candidate and Abraxas’ father sponsors that conservative think-tank and

Ah, fuck. “Yeah, pretty much,” you agree, hating yourself.
Behind you, Orion digs his AirPods out of his pocket. You hear the snap of the magnetic lid as he closes himself off to the world. Abraxas is slouching, the hem of his third-favorite cashmere cardigan catching on the seat behind him, and you realize that you’re alone in this conversation.
Well, fuck it. If those two pricks are going to make you call the Uber, deal with the reimbursement paperwork, and sit in the front seat, you’re going to talk to the driver and make this car conversation as painful as possible for them.
As if reading your thoughts, Tom does the one thing that guarantees a terrible ride: he pitches his app idea.
“You know, I’m also a software developer,” he says, which is at least more promising than when someone isn’t, “and if I had the kind of funding that companies like yours provide, I would absolutely make this app.” He proceeds to describe something completely inane, the type of exclusive, niche social networking app that hasn’t had legs since before the Trump presidency and you would be content to let him drone on, to let Abraxas keep melting into his own seat and to let Orion channel his anger through a knee driven into the back of yours, but—
But for all that Tom’s idea is stupid, he has the energy of the best pitches you see. His energy is infectious. His eyes light up, he gestures with one hand, and when he stops to take a drink (one of those water bottles with a built-in straw, which you associate with joggers and your lamest employees but which does very different things to you when it’s Tom’s mouth wrapped around the top) you’re transfixed by the wet sheen over his chapped lips.
And so, yes, maybe it’s mostly lust, and maybe this is a sign that you need to download Grindr again, even if only to jerk off to the dick pics you’ll get, but you start to actually talk to him.
“There’s no future in niche social networks,” you say, halting Tom in his tracks. “There will always be new ones, don’t misunderstand me, but the broader landscape is saturated by the top names, and they’ll buy out their competitors if they need to. Perhaps you can topple Tumblr, but that’s not a path to profit. If you want to impact the social market, you need to pinpoint the novel interaction model that you want to offer and make yourself buyable.”
“Buyable,” Tom repeats, like he’s never been interrupted before. He probably hasn’t. The first rule of Ubering around the Bay Area or the Valley is to never engage the app pitches, and Orion has started kicking your seat for your transgression.
“Yes,” you enunciate. “You want to be bought out and brought in at a high level. The giant that eats you may or may not use your idea, but you’ll make a comfortable sum as a consolation prize.” You’ve helped companies through this before. You’re flying out to New York this week in part because one of your investments is considering purchase offers and you want to strategize in-person. The founder is dallying, sending emails about independence and integrity, and Orion will bully him into selling while you and Abraxas negotiate the best terms for the contract.
You can feel Tom’s eyes on you. Abraxas might be calling “Thoros
” from the back seat, and Orion might be attempting to annihilate you with his gaze alone, but you’re smiling at that handsome face behind the wheel and hoping for an accident on the 101.
Unfortunately, you make it through San Bruno without running into more than the usual level of traffic, and Tom’s pulling up to your terminal much sooner than you would like. Abraxas and Orion jump out of the car with uncharacteristic speed when it stops, Orion even moving to stand by the trunk in readiness to take his bags. You delay.
“Do you have a business card?” you ask, when it’s clear Tom’s waiting on you.
He fumbles to pull a wallet from his jeans. You can’t quite get a view of his ass as he does, but that doesn’t stop you from looking.
His card is bent at the corner, printed cheaply, and probably from his last job. You’re pretty sure that company doesn’t exist anymore. Tom taps the phone number. “I can be reached here,” he says smoothly, but his professionalism cracks when he adds, “by call or by
 text.”
You know what sort of texts you’d like to receive from him.
Pulling out your own card case, you hand him your card. “Text me,” you say, your voice just this side of appropriate, “any time.”
Tom visibly swallows and jumps out of the car. You take your time getting up, and if your cashmere sweater—Margaret Howell, not that Elder Statesman piece of shit Abraxas is wearing—ends up in the footwell of Tom’s passenger seat, well, you’ll be back in SF next week, won’t you?
“Thanks for the ride, Tom,” you tell him as you take the handle of your luggage, letting your fingers brush his. “I enjoyed our conversation.”
“Yeah,” he nods, and you don’t care that Abraxas is snorting behind you, he’s been judging you this whole trip and he lost out on a hot guy’s number as a result. “It was
”
“Thoros,” you interrupt him before he can ramble and psych himself out. “My name is Thoros, and I really would like to hear from you.”
Tom looks at you then, and you see him pull together the same sureness that drew you into his initial pitch. “I’ll text you about the app.”
“I’m looking forward to it,” you say, meaning it.
—
Bonus:
“You know,” Abraxas drawls as you sit in the United club lounge, gesturing lazily with his overpriced airport Fiji water, “if you tip him too much it’s like you’re paying him for sex.”
Orion looks up from his phone then, removing one earbud for the first time since he put them in. “I’ve paid more for sex with less attractive men.”
“Welcome back,” you say, “I didn’t realize you had paid any attention.”
“Someone would need to not have eyes in order to miss how hot that Uber driver was,” he bites back, returning to his phone.
“Well, I’m tipping him extra anyway,” you announce, confirming Tom’s five-star rating. Should you write a review? Is that too much?
Abraxas, with a grumble, declares, “I’m telling Alecto not to approve this expense.”
—
Bonus bonus:
Your phone buzzes at the end of dinner, the celebratory affair to close the sale which someone had insisted must be at Lilia, even though Abraxas doesn’t eat carbs and you would have preferred to grab a slice at Scarr’s rather than haul out to Williamsburg, anyway.
It’s Tom. Of course it’s Tom—you’ve been texting all week, and between a few late-night flirtations and one very bald statement of interest, you’ve got a date set for when you’re back home. You’re going to Mensho Tokyo, since he lives in the Tenderloin and you live
 vaguely around the Tenderloin, at least, you tell people you live there when you want to seem cooler, and Tom is the type of guy that makes you excited to stand in line for hours to get seats. You’re already thinking about whether you might put your arm around him while you’re waiting, and you unlock your phone to see what he’s saying now.
It’s a picture message.
A picture of Tom, wearing your Howell sweater and no pants and oh god oh fuck—
“Was that Uber driver’s dick?” Abraxas whispers, next to you, and you curse your luck. “Remind me to call the next Uber, Jesus Christ.”
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hopelikethemoon · 4 years ago
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Past Connections (Javier x Reader) {MTMF}
Title: Past Connections Rating: PG-13 Length: 2100 Warnings: Mild Angst  Notes: You can find everything about Maybe Today, Maybe Forever here. Set in March 1998. Summary: The second article hits the newstands. 
@grapemama @seawhisperer @huliabitch @pedropascalito @rogrsnbarnes @thewallpapergoesorido @twomoonstwosuns @gooddaykate @livasaurasrex @ham4arrow @plexflexico @readsalot73 @hdlynn @lokiaddicted @randomness501 @fioccodineveautunnale  @roxypeanut @snivellusim @lukesrighthand @historynerd04 @mrsparknuts @synystersilenceinblacknwhite @behindmyeyes-insidemyhead @exrebelshocktrooper​ @awesomefandomsunited @ah-callie​ @swhiskeys​ @lady-tano @beskar-droids @space-floozy @cable-kenobi @cool-ultra-nerd @himbopoes @findhimfives @pedrosdoll @frietiemeloen @arrowswithwifi @random066 @uncomicalhumour @heather-lynn @domino-oh-damn @cyarikaaa @ahopelessromanticwritersworld @im-still-a-pieceofgarbage @ksgeekgirl  @yabby-girl @xqueenofthecraziesx @punkass-potato @coredrive @pascalesque @theduchessofkirkcaldy @queenquazar @sabinemorans @buckstaposition @holkaskrosnou @yespolkadotkitty @fleetwoodmactshirt @seeking-a-great–perhaps
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PAST CONNECTIONS SPEAK OUT IN DEA SCANDAL 
Following the bombshell report The Post released in the March 2nd issue, the DEA came forward with allegedly incriminating documentation purporting a pattern of unsanctioned expenditures, where Javier Peña had filed expense forms on evenings spent with Colombian hookers. 
During our investigative reporting, The Post was able to connect with three of the women who had been paid by Peña, using DEA funds, during his time with the DEA in Colombia. 
Elena Ramierz, who was willing to go on record using her own name, was forthcoming with information concerning her time with Peña. 
“I would not be where I am today, had I not crossed paths with Javi. He was willing to sponsor my immigration request — without asking for anything in return. Javier Peña is one of the only men I worked with who was a genuinely good man. He cared about all of the girls at the brothels and would look out for us. I cannot, however, say the same about other men who abused the systems the DEA willingly put into place.”
When pressed further, Ramirez went into detail painting a picture of the systemic abuses that were encouraged by the DEA, including but not limited to brutalizing sex workers, non-consensual contact, and intentional situations that led to physical and mental harm. These claims were largely substantiated by the other two women who were willing to speak with The Post. 
“He hated what he had to do to get information for the DEA. You could see the weight on his shoulders. Despite the brutal situation he was in, he was always kind and gentle with me and the other girls. Whatever picture the DEA is trying to paint him out to be, it’s to hide their own misdeeds.”
At the request of the DEA, The Post also made contact with Lorraine Jackson (neĂ© Davis) who was the former ex-fiancĂ© of Peña. Jackson, who hails from Laredo, Texas, provided details about the nature of her relationship with Peña nearly thirty years ago. Despite the DEA’s insistence that Jackson’s testimony would be detrimental to Peña and Morley’s case against DEA, her statement was to the contrary. 
“Look,” Mrs. Jackson stated, “Javier left me at the altar when we were kids. I was angry for a long time. A long time. Even after I got married and started a family with a truly wonderful man. I was still wounded by what Javier did, but it all worked out for the best. I can’t even imagine what life would’ve been like if he’d shown up. Have you met his daughters? They adore him. He’s a good man, despite what happened between us.”
Mrs. Jackson continued, “When the DEA approached me about our relationship, I let my hurt feelings get the best of me. He made a lot of mistakes when he was younger — but didn’t we all? He left, went to college and came back to work for the Sheriff’s Office. He’d closed himself off and frankly, he was an ass. I don’t pretend to know what happened in Colombia, I wasn’t part of his life then, but I could see he had changed when he came home. The DEA wants to paint him out to be a villain in all of this and that’s just not the case.”
The DEA issued a revelatory statement, rebuffing the claims previously printed in The Post. 
There is no doubt that Ms. Morley contributed admirable efforts in the war against Pablo Escobar. As the American people have now seen, her records contain multiple instances where she assisted in the apprehension of multiple associates of Escobar’s. 
Despite her efforts, during her tenure with the DEA in Colombia and Ms. Morley failed to uphold the standards expected of a DEA field agent. One year after her transfer, she entered into a relationship with a CIA liaison who was an active member of a joint task force formed by the two agencies. It became clearly, early on, that she was not capable of maintaining a professional work environment. 
In 1992, when Ms. Morley revealed that she was pregnant, she was immediately placed on desk duty. During a meeting with her direct chain of command, Ms. Morley intentionally concealed the identity of her child’s father. When questioned about Mr. Peña, she blatantly denied that she had any sexual contact with her partner. The following year, when Ms. Morley and Mr. Peña provided the DEA with the truth, we were forced to terminate her employment for her misconduct. 
While The Post may attempt to twist this situation into a gender-based discrimination case, it is abundantly clear that both Ms. Morley and Mr. Peña engaged in unethical practices unbefitting of federal agents. 
The Post reached out to CIA Agent, Lance Collier, who Ms. Morley was in a relationship from June 1988 to June 1989, clarified that their relationship had been approved by his director prior to its beginning. 
Collier was willing to go on record with a statement of his own, “Annie was one of the hardest working agents I’ve ever worked with. During meetings, I repeatedly witnessed her being ignored and silenced by her superiors. They would ultimately use her knowledge under the guise of their own, intentionally undermining her abilities. On numerous occasions, I was also present for meetings where Javier Peña and Steve Murphy would go to bat for their partner. Annie was well aware of the risk and complications related to being a woman in a male dominated field, and despite that she persisted. I have seen men who acted as bad agents against our government still be venerated, so why are they still punishing her for becoming a mother?”
The Post is dedicated to the continued investigation of this scandal. 
 ————
 “You’re brooding.” You told Javier as you shut off the stove and grabbed a trivet to sit the pot of wild rice off the burner. 
Javier huffed, folding his arms across his chest as he leaned against the kitchen counter across from you. “I’m not brooding.” He rubbed at the back of his neck before he pushed away from the counter and moved to grab two plates out of the cabinet. “The timing was just less than ideal.” 
“I know.” You grabbed an oven mitt and pulled out the pan of chicken patties, sitting it on the stovetop. “I wish Vickers had told us how thorough Valerie was going to be in her statement to the paper.” 
“It was fucking mortifying, baby. I don’t know how I’m gonna make it through exams next week. Think it’s too late to make it a paper?” He questioned, grabbing the buns and mayonnaise out of the fridge. 
“Unfortunately,” You made a face as you shut off the oven and moved to grab a paper plate to cut the tomato on. “It’ll blow over.” 
“Not nearly soon enough,” He shook his head. “You know how much I hate looking back on that shit and now everyone knows my business.” 
“It was a risk we were both willing to take,” You reminded him. “Say the word and we pull the plug.” 
“I’m not pulling the fucking plug, baby. I’m just saying — did my class really need to know about my exploits with hookers in Colombia? I get that it’s tantalizing, but she pushed it too far.” 
“Even Elena didn’t realize how far it would go,” You sat the knife down and wiped off your hands on a dishtowel, turning to approach him. “I’m sure the DEA thought they could put a wedge between us — like I didn't know what you got up to.” 
“You talked to Elena today?”
You nodded, “I called to thank her. Her word would’ve been enough I think, but having two ‘Jane Smiths’ reaffirm what she was saying? There’s so much bullshit going on, in the pursuit of stopping drugs that has to end. We both know how they abuse those women.” You reached up and brushed your fingers over his cheek, leaning up on your toes to kiss him. 
He snaked his arm around your waist, pulling you towards him. “Think they’ll try to track down Matias next?” 
You let out an incredulous laugh at that, “God, I don’t even know what happened to him.” You admitted, “I doubt they’d be able to track him down.” He had been a sweet young man you’d spent a handful of evenings with in the pursuit of intel nearly a decade ago. “It’s not like you don’t know.” 
Javier dragged his teeth over his bottom lip and nodded slowly, “It’s just fucking bullshit. Even if it exonerated us.” He sighed heavily, “I should’ve cancelled class. Standing up there trying to keep on topic — knowing they’ve just read an article with three women who I’ve fucked.”
“Technically five.” You pointed, clarifying when he arched a brow.  “Elena, Valerie, and Mia, Lorraine, and myself.” 
He made a face, feigning disgust before he released you. “I hadn’t realized the DEA would be so determined to punch below the belt.”
“Because bribing Monica to say you’d fucked her was above the belt?” You pointed out as you moved to grab two buns out of the bag, throwing them on the plates and using a spatula to pick up the chicken patties and place them on each bun. 
“Alright, alright. You’re making valid points.” He raked his fingers through his hair. “One day the girls are going to see these articles.” 
“Then we’ll explain to them that sex workers deserve more praise and credit than they’re currently afforded.” You stated simply, “And that there’s nothing wrong about being sexually active — like we were, before we got together.” You shrugged. 
“You wanna have that conversation with them?”
You shrugged, licking your thumb clean after you got mayonnaise on it, “Sure. It doesn’t bother me.” 
Javier pinched at the bridge of his nose for a moment before he started plating up his chicken sandwich, “You got cheese?”
“Hang on,” You headed for the fridge, pulling the door open and rummaging around in the deli drawer. “Swiss or cheddar?”
“Do we have any of the pepperjack left?”
You hummed as you pulled open a drawer below, grabbing the bag of pepperjack cheese. “You’re in luck. I hid it the last time Nadia was here.” You tossed it onto the counter beside him, “That girl loves cheese.” 
“Monica wasn’t in class today,” Javier stated, throwing two pieces of cheese onto his chicken patty before topping it off with the bun, “Did you hear from her today? I meant to call but got pulled into meetings.” 
“I called her this morning at work,” You told him as you stowed the mayo back in the fridge. “She’s still pretty skittish after everything that happened.” You explained, smiling when you returned to your plate and Javier had scooped up a spoonful of wild rice for you. “Thanks, babe.” 
He pressed a kiss to your cheek, “Anytime.” Javier gave your ass a playful swat before he headed for the kitchen table. “She’s got office hours with me tomorrow.” 
“I wouldn’t make a big deal about it,” You cautioned him as you sat down across from him at the table. “Honestly, she seemed fine. She just wanted to skip today.” You took a bite of your sandwich, before washing it down with a swig of beer. “I can’t wait for all of this to be over with.” 
“You and me both, baby.” Javier retorted, covering his mouth with his fist as he spoke with his mouth full. “I want them to fucking pay for their bullshit and let us get on with our lives.” 
You nodded your head slowly, “Everyone at the P.D. has been so supportive. They’re far from perfect, but they at least recognize what the DEA’s been doing is morally and ethically wrong.” 
Javier rocked his jaw slowly as he stared at you across the table, “You still thinking about quitting?”
“All the time,” You admitted with a shrug. “I just want to get through this first. The DEA’s been such a dark shadow for so many years.” 
“Once this is over, I feel like we’ll be able to really live.” 
“Right?” You agreed with a grin, “Connie thinks we should go on vacation.” 
“As soon as this semester’s over.” 
You leaned across the table and took his hand into yours, giving it three short squeezes. “There’s a part of me that is stupidly excited about my name finally being attached to yours in the record books. And Steve’s, of course. It’s bizarre to see our lives laid out in the newspaper, but at the same time — I love it.” 
“Me too, baby.” Javier grinned at you, “It means no more hiding.” 
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shittyfandomimagines · 5 years ago
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Tired with Paper Bags
Idk what this is... I wrote it in 15 mins so it’s probably trash
Pure fluff with some tired cute fluff, GIF creds to owner
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“Sorry to drag you along with me to the store, we can always go back home and I’ll come back later. I know you’re exhausted from work and it’s your first week back. I should’ve shopped beforehand.” I was a blubbering mess and he just gave me a tired grin.
“Anywhere you are is home.” He grins and I roll my eyes. “Literally shut the fuck up you cringe-full fool.” I go to shove his shoulder and he grabs my hand to pull me into his side. “I’m kidding, well not really, but I’m fine with just going to a store at 9 p.m.” Calum’s infectiously goofy smile made me grin too.
“Are you sure, I’m sorry I didn’t shop beforehand,” I mumble as I grab a cart and start making my way towards the dairy section. “You’ve been busy with finals all week, you’ve been just as busy so don’t worry about it.” He kisses the side of my head and I smile more. “I appreciate that.”
“So like, can I get some cookie dough?”
“You’re a multi-millionaire and you’re asking me if you can get cookie dough, really?”
“I’ll take that as a yes.”
I shake my head as he puts a few packages of cookie dough into the basket as I pick up some eggs. I grab some cheese sticks and a gallon of milk. “There’s honestly two types of shoppers.” He jokes as he watches me pick up the essentials.
“Well, budgeting is a lifestyle, Cal.” I poke fun and he sticks his tongue out.
I move towards the cereal, he eats the shit out of that more than anything. I pull the Froot Loops and Cap’n Crunch family size boxes as he just follows behind like a lost puppy.
I continue shopping that way for a while before I ended up in the clothes section. I had gotten so sidetracked from finishing groceries. I look up to ask Cal about a shirt but I stopped in my tracks when I see his droopy eyes and a big yawn escaping.
I put the shirt down and grab his warm hand, he blinked so slowly and it made me feel guilty for keeping him up. “Let’s checkout. You’re exhausted.” I give a small smile and head towards the line, he stood behind me with his arms wrapped around the front of me.
He sluggishly helped me unload the cart onto the conveyor belt, I stand in front of the card reader waiting for the guy to finish up, Cal graciously loaded them into the cart again after they were bagged.
The total comes up and I pull my card out, Calum booty-bumping me out of the way and swiping his card before I even had the chance to. I pout a little but I see his competitive smile and I roll my eyes.
We give our goodbyes to the cashier and make our way to the car. “I could’ve paid tonight, you didn’t have to,” I mumble and he chuckles. “Yeah I know, but as you said, I am a multi-millionaire.” He acts like he was bragging and I snicker quietly.
We load up the trunk and put the cart back, I snatch the keys from Calum’s hand and run to the driver's seat, jumping in before he could physically remove me.
“Babyyyyy,” he strung out the last letter and continued to get into the passenger side. “Babe, your bags under your eyes are sponsored by Gucci and Jet-Lag, I can drive home.” I revved up the car and backed out.
Between the cool air, dark skies, and his already present drowsiness, he was out by the time I made it onto the interstate.
——
I carefully and quietly unloaded the car with it running, I have never sprinted back and forth so fast just to get it done. I wanted Cal to sleep as long as he could so he didn’t feel obligated to help when he was this exhausted.
“Calum, baby, we’re home.” I shake his right shoulder gently, he stretched slightly before releasing the seatbelt. I help him out and start towards the front door. “Baby, the groceries.” He mumbled and I laughed to myself. “They’re inside already, cmon.”
Once inside I lead him to the living room to sit for a while, I unloaded the groceries quickly, I could see his sleepy figure on the couch. I smiled to myself as he was trying so hard to stay awake.
I folded up the paper bags and stick them beside the fridge. “Hey babe, are you ready to go to bed?” I ask and he slowly nods, standing up even slower.
I grab his hand as we ascend the staircase, I couldn’t wait to be his arms but also our bed.
Once we made it to our room, we both strip down and he hands me the shirt he was wearing, I slipped it over me quickly. He flopped in bed and I was close in pursuit.
“Thank you for unloading the groceries, I’m sorry I didn’t help at all.”
“I’m sorry I made you go out, I knew you were tired and I should’ve either waited or went earlier. I’m sorry.”
The guilt built more when I saw his baggy eyes blink so slowly. He pushed some tiny hairs away from my face and then just brushed my face with his calloused fingers.
“Babe, stop feeling guilty about that, I’m not concerned about it. We both survived, slowly and tiredly, but we made it out with cookie dough.” He joked so quietly, the tiredness seems to take away the volume.
“You’re goofy babe,” I slightly laugh and he grins softly.
“Can I be honest with you?” He asks and I nod, weird to ask considering we were always honest.
“You keep apologizing and it reminds me of when you took me home to your parents like the 3rd time. You were very hangry and making cookies from scratch, you had just put them in the oven and then loaded up the dishwasher. I hopped onto the counter to sit and I just took time to admire you, per usual, but it felt so wholesome,” I go to open my mouth to talk about how I didn’t know what he was talking about, he lays his hand over it.
“Your mom came in, saw us and she jokingly said something along the lines of ‘you’re forcing a millionaire to watch you make cookies, doesn’t he have anything better to do.’ She walked out of the room and you apologized the whole time because you figured it was accurate but it wasn’t. It still isn’t. I knew when I got to watch you work you're way around the house and just made cookies so peacefully with me, I knew I wanted to see it again years down the road. I wanted to see you being my best friend as we got to do subtle yet loving things, and I get to do that. So, you inviting me to go shop because you still wanted to spend time with my tired ass and even letting me sleep through your whole unloading session, buying my favorite cereals without thought, or even thinking you’d pay for groceries... you just you make up my whole life. I wouldn’t change cookie making or tired grocery shopping for anything. Literally anything.” His speech was so slurred and slow from drowsiness but it still made me grin ear to ear.
“I’m gonna have to ship you around a plane for a couple of hours a day so you’re jet-lagged, you’re a lot more sentimental and cute.” I joke and kiss his forehead softly.
“I just really love you.” He mumbled and I could tell all of the energy went into the speech.
“Calum, I love you more than life. I would sell my left kidney just to make sure I got to spend time with you. I cherish any moment or memory I get to share with you.” I run my thumb over his silver hairline. He smiled so warmly and tiredly.
“Why your left one? Not the right?” He mumbled and I snickered. “I was hoping I could get more for it being my left.”
“Baby, I’m so tired and I want to stay up to talk about kidneys and my love for you, but I’m so tired.” He whined and I kissed his pouty lips quickly.
“Good night babe, I love you forever.”
“Night, I love you and your kidneys”.
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shesawriter39049 · 5 years ago
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CV SQUAD PT.1 (M)
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Podcast host/Youtuber/Influencer BTS & OC
CV SQUAD TAKE: MIAMI,NEW YORK, LONDON, LA
CV SQUAD TAKE MIAMI- PART 1 OF 2
WARNINGS:(There’s both some M/F & M/M smuttyness in here so I’ll let you find out which warnings apply to who) Some hand fun,Hella dirty talk, cum play, spit play, light choking, public sex, light mirror kink ,a ton of teasing between all 8 “Characters” All the boy’s are Bi in this BTW . Tatted and Pierced BTS (Not all but most)
JIMIN/OC MAIN FOCUS OT7 SUBFOCUS (MXM/MXF) 
In this part Hoseok/Yoongi have a bigger roll in my opinion but again there all in it a ton 
There is a lot of dialog in this one but it’s needed
I’m introducing 8 people sooooo lol
9.7 K
AU SUMMARY : The “CV SQUAD” is made up of Jimin,YN, Namjoon, Yoongi, and Kookie a group of friends who run a podcast called “Candid Vibes” . That was created initially for a media arts project,in college which is actually how they all met! Now fast forward a good 4 years, a YT channel and millions of listeners later..and we have the CVSQUADTOUR.  A four city tour spanning over 16 days, with guest appearances from some of their good friends over at “TEAMJTH” AKA Jin, Taehyung,and Hoseok. Follow along to get the full candid behind the scenes access to everything that takes place over the next 2 weeks, including the moments there definitely going to edit out of the tour vlogs!!!  P.S the full backstory will be linked at the end!
***This is happening in real time, so in some scenes if there’s a [C] in front of the person dialog that means there talking into the camera. Or if it says [FILMING] that means there in shot but not talking directly to the camera***
****Wednesday July 4th, 5:45 AM,Valencia, CA -CV SQUAD HOUSE (Tour starts on the 5th in Miami) ***
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“Ah fuck!!” A loud grumbled leaves Yoongi's chest as he sets the camera on the kitchen counter, ruffling his hands through his faded ice blue locks, readjusting his oversized cat eye glasses on his face before pushing the record button.
[C] “Aye, goodmorning guys, it’s ughhh fuck, 5:45 which is why the lighting probaly sucks in addition to the fact that I’m not Jungkook! Sooo as you guys know we all went out last night with the guys over at TEAMJTH, for a pre-tour dinner thing, which started at 7:30 but Y/N and Jimin didint get there till like 8 which, what the fuck else is new.” Letting out a slow exhale as his body just slouched along the back counter, taking a sip of coffee before continuing his thought.
[C] “ Well, Jin and I were the first to leave around, like 11:30 ish and I had the displeasure of spending the night here, because that’s the only way I’d ensure these asshats woke up on time. And  when I got up this morning my phone said the last time the alarm went off was a little after 3AM..and again it’s 5:45 and I’m about to go wake them up because come look at this shit!“  Turning the camera away from his face to let it lead the way down the hallway and into the PR room, or “Hell” as Yoongi called it .
There was a room on the first floor that was originally meant to be a “parlor” but obviously that's not anything the 4 of you would need or want! So it was turned into the PR closet, as you guys were always being sent items to review, or even paid to post about it. It only took one of you missing an ad that couldve made you an easy 3k to realize this shit needed to be kept out of your bedrooms until the job was done. So inteased you have a room filled with numerous clothing racks and boxes, separated by CV member!  But it was also where all of your luggage was sitting and it barely looked liked you guys were packed, or at least not 16 days worth!
Letting the camera pan the room as he let out an exasperated sigh, even in the dim lighting only fueled by the numerous neon signs along the walls it was still clear this room was a hot ass mess.
[C] “Can we all take a moment to appreciate the site in front of us, that is without a doubt bullshit!” Panning the camera over to the right, zooming in slightly, on all of your half-assed excuse for packing. “Yeah, so on that note, were gonna walk down the hall and wake up Jimin first, and then make our way upstairs to get everyone else.”
Making his way down a long dark hallway before making a right to head to Jimin’s room, until he hears an almost animalistic noise coming from the opposite direction. Heading to the laundry room instead only to find Jungkook, snoring,with his mouth open, on a bean bag chair..with a bag of chocolate covered lays to his right.
There was a very long pause, as the camera pans between Kookie and Yoongi, before his eyes flutter shut, holding the bridge of his nose between his index and thumb.
[C] “Ya know, sometimes...I just really don’t know what my life is
.I really, really don't
.” reaching down to shake Jungkook “Hey, hey,HEY! Kookie! Dude whyyyyyyy !? What are you doin on the floor in here of all places?” Pausing momentarily honestly hoping for an answer than even made a fragment of sense.  Instead he was greeted with a displeased grumble as kookie attempted to readjust on the oversized bean bag chair .
[C] “Nooo no, no up! Get up, go shower, and finish packing NOW! You got like an hour and 7 minutes. And then your taking this damn camera back because I hate this thing! ”
The tone alone has the younger abiding Yoongi’s orders, far too tired to argue anyway slowly rolling off the floor, grabbing his chips in the process. Managing to get chocolate all over the collar of the white “OFF white” Jacket he slept in. While Kookie slugged his way out of the laundry room, still whining like a bart in the process.
Quickly whipping out his phone to check Jungkooks IG, letting out a relieved sigh at his last 3 posts which all had well over 600k likes. But more importantly Jungkook posted the sponsored post, prior to ruining the jacket...and that’s all that mattered!
[C] “One down..two to go
.”
What he actually meant was Yoongi didn't need to wake up was Namjoon, well aware that he was already up and well
..that’s because that's whose room he started and woke up in himself
.
Finally heading back to his initial mission, Jimin, turning in the opposite direction, making a right, then walking down four very random stairs that lead to his bedroom . Two black framed french doors sat cracked, the room initially was a sunroom converted to a bedroom because Jimin wanted to be on the first floor and the guest room “wouldn’t even hold my shoes “. So this was the alternative...
Upon opening it he finds the both of you in bed together, but there's nothing even remotely sexual about this if anything it’s comical. Both fully dressed, like shoes and all, how you managed to sleep in that skin tight hot pink body con dress, that barely looked like you had room to breathe is besides me. The upper half of your body was almost hanging half off his california king while Jimin’s foot was damn near in a ballerina point. Evident even through his leather dress boots, neck stretched so far to the side it was almost on his night stand. One hand draped over your hip while the other hung off the bed.
[C] “Why am I not even remotely surprised at this point!?.” A combination of frustration and amusement laced within his voice as he slumped to the ground. Letting a low cackle rupture through his throat, as he still tried to keep his voice at a whisper. Only standing in the door frame at this point. “ I swear I don’t get paid enough for this
..” Walking over to turn on the lights, but unfortunately Jimin only had mood lighting so the dim aesthetic really did nothing to stir the two of you.
Flipping the angle so the camera was facing him again before speaking into it at a hushed tone [C]“Offf course this boy has strip club hoe lighting to go with his damn silk curtains because why wouldn't he! Alright guys’ Imma set this camera on the nightstand, because these two are damn near comatose, and I need two hands for this!  I’m not sure how much footage you will or won't get but I really need to get them up so blame Kookie for also being hungover if this parts shitty!”
At this point because of where the camera was sitting you could only see the bottom of the bed , but it was picking up the conversation taking place above it.
Yoongi reached over readjusting your body on the bed only causing you drape your arms around him in attempts to pull him in “No, no, no..Y/n get up..” Shaking your body until your eyes fluttered, making your roll over closer to Jimin, who welcomed you with no hesitation even in his sleep, always a cuddler even in the platonic sense.
“Alright fuck this..” Hopping on the bed between the two of you, shaking you both until your eyes fluttered open. Jimin’s even puffer than usual from lack of sleep, slipping into complete slits in his face. You weren't doing any better, suddenly your lash extensions felt like bricks hanging on your lids, as you struggled to keep your eyes ajar.  A loud screech comparable to banche left your throat as you stretched,managing to crack a few bones in the process
 “Yo, it’s like 5 to 6...you two need to shower and finish packing,private or not we still gotta go through TSA, and you know how LAX is...we need to be outta here by 8! Let’s get movin!!” He was far from yelling but there was no room for debate within the leverage he held as he spoke.
Rolling over to your side, resting your hand on your temple, eyes zoning in on a very faint mark behind Yoongi’s ear making your smirk slightly. “Where did you sleep last night?” Brow quirked at the sudden implied question, the devilish grin on your face transferring to jimins as he ruffled his fingers through his long dark locks. Currently almost jet black, parted messily down the middle with a couple pieces falling in his face framing that lethal jawline of his! Kicking off his shoes and unbuttoning his white dress shirt, leaving his toned caramelized abdomen on display. Giving you a sneak peek at the roses that danced along his ribcage, as he readjusted next to you on the bed.
“Yeah Yoongi where did you sleep last night hmm? Needed a little stress reliever before tour even starts aye?” The playful yet taunting tenor in Jimin's voice eared an eye roll and middle finger from Yoongi.
“Fuck you both, I slept in the guest room thank you very much!” Snapping back with a snarl, while the two of you instantly exchanged glances, eyes meeting and rolling in the same direction simultaneously.
“Really!?” The word left both of your lips in unison, dry as all hell, as you tried to ease off the bed, your hangover knocking you right on your ass. Literally, plopping  back down next to jimin, causing him to smile over at you fondly, stroking the side of your jaw. The contrast of the metal from his rings soothing your skin, nuzzling your face slightly into his palm.
The tone in both of your voices screamed “BULLSHIT”! There were things that happened every once in a while that were kept on the DL, even within the squad ,typically never confirmed or denied, just forever the butt of every, inside joke.
“How the fuck would either of you know different? Your drunk ass couldn't even make it upstairs!” The words slipped from his lips so effortlessly it was like he was already prepared for the two of you to give him that reaction.
“Bitch” Bringing your hand down to meet his ass, as he rolled off the bed smaking it so hard your palm burned from the impact. Earning a low hiss to leave his throat, a noise that was secretly pleasing to both Jimin and yourself if were being honest.
“No, but  I’m serious, you two up! Up!” Shoeing his hands in your direction .
Jimin hopped off the bed first, throwing his shirt on the floor “For once, the little grimiln over there actually has a method to his madness, we need to get moving princess..” Abruptly grabbing you off the bed and throwing you over his shoulder before walking towards the door.
“Hey I heard that! You little shit!” Yoongi aimed a pillow at Jimin but considering he’s not even remotely athletic it landed on your ass instead! Earning a loud squeal from the sudden change of, well shit everything as now you're literally staring at the ground and his ass, in these skin tight leather pants.
The minute the two of you made it into the hallway and he walked up those 4 steps it was game over. All Yoongi could hear from inside Jimin’s bedroom was you literally screaming “Park, down,now put me down I’m literally going to throw up put me down!!”
Picking the camera off the nightstand as he plopped back down on Jimin’s bed , head jerking suddenly from the feeling of something rolling out of the pillowcase. Only to find it’s a bottle of lube, quickly looking at the brand before giving what appeared to be an approving nod, throwing it to the side before bringing the camera up to his face.
[C] “Well ladies and gentlemen..this is gonna be...interesting..to say the least..I’mma go make my rounds, make sure everyone is actually up. Make sure Y/N didn't puke in the damn hallway, I also need to check in with our boys over at TEAMJTH. I’m sure Jin’s the only coherent one, I know they were all over here at some point and I have no idea what time they left!” Pausing to pull his phone out of his pocket, letting his thumb hover over Jin’s contact.
[C] “ Maybe I’ll be somewhat nice and make a starbucks run
.meh will see how I feel.But yeah, will check in once Kook’s sober so he can film because I’m sure this was a shit show! So on that note..I’m out! Peace!!”
~~~~~~
“How you wanna do this ?” Voice sitting barley above a whisper as he stroked your cheek, while you sat on the ground of the 1st floor guest bathroom. Hair all tousled to the right as your head rested on your arm, which was still braced along the toilet seat. A warm rag coming up to grace the back of your neck “You wanna shower here or go upstair-” cutting him off with a nod before he could even finish his thought. Needing to sit in the humidity before you even tried to walk upstairs. Nodding quickly before walking behind you to turn the shower up,  stepping out into the hallway to grab a towel.
“Someone slept in her makeup
” Tisking lowly as he placed the towel on the counter, before walking back out into the wall.
“Fuck, yeah I know thank god my skin is damn near bullet proof or else I’d be fucked, remind me to never drink on a stomach fuled by soley the dessert menu! “ Rolling your eyes in frustration at no one but yourself as you slowly got off the ground.Feeling slightly light headed in the process, pulling  your dress over your head. Only revealing a nude g-string, the dress was so tight you almost considered not wearing panties at all. As you stepped into the shower you heard the door open again, apparently he went to also grab you makeup wipes, only catching the tail end of your naked body as you disappeared behind the steamed glass.
Not even bothering to apologize because it wasn't the first time he’d seen you like that, sticking your head out the glass, extending your arms for the wipes, as you smiled over in his direction. “Thank you for taking care of my hungover ass
” Shooting him a lazy smile as you rested your head against the tile.
Returning the gesture with a slight bow of the head as he edged towards the door, “No need to thank me, I’mma go hop in the shower myself, I also sat some tylenol on the counter, but come find me if you need me okay?” The genuine care and concern in his voice forced you to give him a legit smile no matter how dead your body felt, Jimin was good people, you don’t meet a lot of them in this industry that’s for damn sure! Nodding in response, another thank you left your lips lightly before letting your body reunite with the steam.
“How’s she feelin?” Jimin heard Namjoon’s voice echo throughout the empty hallway , changing his direction from his bedroom over to the kitchen. Joon was standing behind the island shirtless, mixing together a protein drink, Jimin noticed the tripbod to his right that was holding his phone. Figuring he probably just filmed something, more than likely an instagram video. Shamelessly taking in Namajon’s honey dipped complexion, offset by his dark brows and ice blonde hair.
Joon went through phases were he choose to tone his body, always someone with a strong build so it didn't take much for him to build up muscle mass. In Jimin eyes he was the perfect combination of muscular yet soft all at the same time! A couple small tattoo’s dancing along his body, all quotes written in an old fashioned script. From various books, or artist that caught his attention, not one for random spur or the moment pieces they all held a lot of meaning!
A dimply smile pulled on Joon’s face as he observed the way the younger was damn near drooling “Thanks Chim, I’m glad your enjoying the progress I’m making at the gym” The smile quickly turned into a full blown smirk once he took in how red Jimin got, even though his tanned complexion.
Shaking his head lightly as he chuckled, slightly embarrassed, letting his eyes meet their freshly polished hardwood floors, before brining his gaze back to his elder. Raking his fingers through his hair before slowly letting them slide down his neck “What can I say, I appreciate the hard work that’s all...I know it’s not easy to stay committed!”Ending with a slight nod , that held equal amounts of sass and arrogance.
Strutting over to grab a seat in front of Namjoon “Are these any good, or are they just payin you well?”
A playful tenor rang through his voice as he recognized the very popular protein brand to his right. Finally putting two and two together, as far as his appearance and the tripod, he was clearly filming an AD for the company. Namjoon quirked his brow clearly not as amused as Jimin, while taking a sip, “Don”t try me, last I checked none of us were hungry enough to take a deal just because. We either actually like it or we don’t post about it..or did I miss something?”
Dropping his posture slightly, resting his chin on his knuckles as he locked his eyes with the younger Namjoon’s rebuttal had jimin throwing his hands up, waving his white flag immediately. “Touche, your right, your right! Lemme taste it..” He actually wasn’t asking more so demanding as he grabbed the cup, lacing his tongue around the straw before wrapping his lips around it.
Namjoon’s eyes narrowed into tiny slits at the sight, well aware of what this little shit was doing, making sure the diamond , from his piercing caught the end of the straw “Really? Is that what it is Park?”  Cocking his head to the side slightly, there was an air of amusement that danced along his face while Jimin faked innocence, earning an eye roll from namjoon while he stepped back relaxing against counter. Putting his full abdomen, V line and all on display, while his joggers sat dangerously low...I swear the two of them secretly got off on constantly tempting each other! Though in all honesty it was USUALLY always harmless and just playful, the four of you flirts by nature.
“So what time did you go to bed last night?” Jimin tried to play it cool but Namjon knew he was digging..trying to see if anything happened between him and Yoongi.
“Ugh, around 1, a little after Hoe-seok made an apperance
.fuck, you two missed A LOT!”
“What? OH the lapdance!? Fuckkkk I know! That’s the last thing I remember looking at one my phone, just wait until drama channels get a hold of it, Next thing you know there engaged to be married! “ Jimin rolled his eyes annoyed at just the thought of how everything suddenly became an internet headline.Not that it’s ever stopped any of them from doing whatever they want, when they want!
There was suddenly a mischievous glint in Namjoon’s eyes before he shook his head “Nah, there was another lap dance, that hopefully isn't on anybody's snap chat
” .
Jimin’s brows furrowed in slight confusion, and annoyance at the way Namjoon was dragging this out “Just fuckin send it Joonie I don’t have all damn day!”
A snort left namjoon’s body as he dropped his head on the island before continuing “ Alright ,alright, so when  I got home, Kookie, Tae, Ryland, And morgan were chillin’ listening to The Weeknd doing jell-o shots. He was originally giving Morgan a lap dance,and like stripping and shit. Then I come in, we all know Hoseok can’t hold his liquor, I make a comment about his ass in those jeans he was wearing and the next thing I know he’s on my lap
and ugh, yeah...”
The hesitation as his jaw closed, let Jimin known there was more he wanted to say he just choose not too, now how much more is the question.
Jimin gazed back at him completely wide eyed, jaw damn near hanging to the floor, fuck what he would’ve given to be there for that!  “Careful you might catch something
” Joon teased as he took his phone off the tripod
”Fuck, it’s almsot 6:30 you need to get your ass in the shower before Yoongi cut’s your balls off , he just left, and he spent all morning bitching!”
“Ughhh, fine but were texting about this whole ..”dance” situation later because I got questions! Also when is Yoongi NOT bitching, you just love being his little helper huh? Such a good little boy for him aren't you Joonie!!” The taunting almost demeaning tone in Jimin’s voice had his blood boiling, brow quirked, jaw extremely tight. His lethal gaze was daring the younger to even think about saying another word!
Jimin was well aware if they did have sex theres no way in hell Namjoon was bottoming. So he was hoping if he struck a nerve Joon would correct him which would at least confirm if his suspicion of them hooking up in the past was right. But clearly Namjoon was a little too smart for that one

“Nah, more like I just know how to keep my shit together so I don’t get bitched out, now how about you be a good little boy for your hyung and go take a shower yeah!?” Now it was Joon’s turn to taunt Jimin , his tone alone had jimin shifting in his seat, low, calm yet authoritative all at the same time. All of the boys were Korean-American, so there were obviously some cultural things that just weren’t done as often in america, and referring to your male elder as “Hyung” constantly was one of them. But considering Jimin can find a way to turn anything into a kink he already knew Jimin’s underwear we soaked on command!
Jimin exhaled deeply it was clear as day he was soooo damn annoyed “Sure, anything for you hyung
” Tone dry and snarky as all hell, adding a very condescending enfaces on the honorary as he hopped out the chair, making sure to sway in his skin tight leather pants as he exited the kitchen.
“That’s it, such a good boy for me Jiminie, such a good boy..” Namjoon coaxed with almost cynical smile, earning a very deserved dual middle finger from the younger as he fully exited the space.
~~~~~~
“Can you arch for me a little, a little more, a little..yesss just like that...just lean into it a little...perfect now stay like that for me
” If Yoongi didn't know any, he’d probably second guess himself before walking into this room. Actually he’s still second guessing himself, but to his pleasant surprise, it’s a photoshoot not an orgy! . As Jimin, Namjoon, and yourself, laid across your fluffy white couch in an obscene amount of Clavin Klein while Jungkook took pics for an IG post. With all the traveling you guys were about to be doing you just didn't trust yourself to get some of these AD’s up on time so you were trying to cram as much as you could! Forcing yourself to do your infamous “5 minute beat” but begging Kookie to edit the fuck outta these pic’s because you still felt like literal death!
Jimin, opting to go shirtless with the briefs peeked out from under the joggers, namjoon kept on a hoodie  leaving it completely unzipped, while you went for the short’s teasing a red and white thong above the waist band along with the matching bra. All of you going for variations of red, white, and blue due to the day at hand.
Rolling his eyes instantly at the sight in front of him “For your safety I really hope this means your all done packing and when the uber comes in 15 minues you’ll be ready to go!”  Setting down a tray of drinks and bagels, face hidden behind a pair of oversized designer shades. The low rasp in his voice let you know he was just exhausted as the rest of you, but you still had shit to do regardless!
“You reallllly have no faith in us!” You could literally hear the pout in Jimin’s voice without even looking.
“The outfits were sorted on racks, when our stylist and Sara were here yesterday we just ran out of time between that conference call and getting ready for dinner to pack it all. There really wasn't shit to do!” You perked up, with a shrug reaching up to grab the Lavender tea, typically a coffee person but you knew since you were sick this morning, and still felt a little off this one was for you! Reclining your  back into Namjoon’s chest slightly, while to stole your drink out of your hand, inviting himself to taste it.  Brining one hand over to soothe up and down your arm before having the nerve to pass your drink over to Jimin instead of returning it to you.
“Alright, and were sure?! Kookie, all your equipment, is packed, labeled, secured!?” Raising his glasses up to look the youngest in the eyes, that infamous chipmunk smile, meeting Yoongi’s glare.
“Yesss Yoongi, that stuff’s been backed, and double checked, it’s good, were good!!”
Stepping back slowly with a nod of approval, clearing his throat before speaking “Even though the four of you are going to be the cause of my premature aging, wrinkles and receding hairline...I just ugh, want you to know I’m honestly really proud of you guys!This was just some little bullshit project we did to pass trade school, in hopes of one day working in our field. And you guys managed to turn it into a career, we were just hoping to be able to do what we love without struggling now look  
” Pausing suddenly, you could hear his voice wavering, making you all equally teary eyed as this was NOT like Min Yoongi at all.
“For the record it’s the five of us, always has been, always will be, we wouldn’t have made it this far without you, hell we wouldn't have graduated without you honestly!” Jimin pipped in first, feeling the need to stroke his ego a little, even though he was speaking straight facts.
Yoongi was technically the eldest, and was wayyy better at managing the combination of partying and studying while living in LA! When you guys met originally 4 years ago , Yoongi was 21, Joon was turning 21, you were 20, Jimin was 19, and Kookie just turned 18. All at different walks in life, as you enrolled in this program for media arts just trying to turn your hopes into something feasible.
“Don’t ever forget that, Candid Vibes wouldn’t be what it is without you, and we love you too by the way, I think you were dancing around that phrase!” Smiling over fondly in Yoongi’s direction, as he tried to hide the smile moving up his face.
The three of you shared a quick glance before getting up to tackle Yoongi who gave a displeased grumped but you all knew he secretly loved it! Squeezing until his legs gave out and he was rolling around on the floor trying to break free.
“Alrigh, alright get the fuck off me!!!” Swatting in your direction. Face contorted in aggravation while the three of you cackled aimlessly honestly not even phased by him anymore. This was just the way he showed his love and you wouldn’t want it any other way!
“ While I go double check on the Ubers, quickly film your update for the CVSQUADTOUR IG account, and please just do another one over on your bags!”  There was a plea to his tone this time  as opposed to the normal hints of anger!
Jungkook mounted his phone on the tripod so you guys could film and the video could be uploaded directly after. Just a standard update, wishing them a happy and safe 4th of July,letting them know how excited you all were, and to keep following all of your socials for updates, and pop-up events blah blah blah!
2 UberXL pulled up, one solely for your luggage alone, the cars were also sponsored, the four of you used Uber on a weekly basis! The drive to the airport was damn near 40 minutes in traffic thank god you were flying private and the plane wasn't leaving until you got there. The 3 of you almost falling asleep the minute your bodies hit the seats, last night's festivities hitting all at once. While Yoongi made business calls making sure your house and other things were looked over while the four of you traveled. The only other girl on the team was Sara, who had the toughest job in your opinion, being your shared assistant. She left for Miami yesterday,since that’s where her girlfriend is for college, wanting a little personal time before you guys ran her ragged!
Amongst arriving at LAX a couple fans noticed you guys and of course you stopped taking pics outside and in the meantime the guys over at TEAMJTH pulled up!
[FILMING-THIS ENTIRE SECTION IS BEING FILMED CASUALLY PANNING BETWEEN ALL 10 MEMBERS WITH NO MAIN FOCUS]
Clearly they had a brand deal of their own, all of them in Tommy Hilfiger loungewear from head to toe, and they all looked damn good! Hoseok’s long burgundy locs messy pushed out of his face, while pitch black ray bans covered his eyes. His joggers were so damn tight you could damn near see the muscles flex as he walked. If you didn't know any better you’d think you were drooling, his toned arms fully exposed in his loose fitting white tank top, making his tan look even stronger.
“Jung fucking -Hoseok
” A low growl left Jimin’s throat he was standing right next to you as he said it, not even bothering to whisper, the two of you sharing a glance that read the same damn thing..this man  was fine as all hell!
While Taehyung trugged behind him, pulling a Jimin, as his hoodie sat slightly unzipped exposing his chiseled chest and the fact that he wasn't wearing a shirt, a couple thin chains dancing along his collarbone. His dark locks falling in his face from under his hood, this man had on looser fitting sweats, they were gray and he had on, no TYPE of underwear..none in site. Everything just slinging around as you walked.
“Oh fuck off
” You heard Junkgook whisper out to himself from behind the camera in a low almost aggravated tone at the site of Taehyung and you couldn't even blame him!
Last you had Jin in all black, fitted joggers and a pretty tight black tank top, and for the first time you realized how broad Jins shoulders were, and how nice this man’s arms were. His freshly touched up lavender locks bounced in the wind, offsetting the all balck outfit.
“Fuck..” left Nmajoon’s lips almost as if he was winded, at the sight of TEAMJTH approaching...yeah this was gonna ugh, be a fun little trip!!
All of the boys were openly Bi,as were you, there was no preference for any of you, you just liked who you liked. But something you‘ve noticed over the years is the 7 of them were a lot picker when it comes to their male counterparts.  Yet they seemed to fit each others criteria effortlessly
Hug’s and hello’s were exchanged, but it was clear all of you needed a damn nap, the energy level was at a negative 2 right now!
Hoseok draped his arm around your shoulder as you guys made your way through the airport, keeping your body close to his as he made casual conversation. Voice sitting exceptionally husky due to lack of sleep but fuck if it didint sound good.
[JK IS STILL FILMING JUST NOT THE TWO OF THEM]
The two of you waited while the others went into the gift shop for snacks neither of you could be bothered to move. Leisurely laying his arm around your waist pulling you in to snuggle into his chest amongst hearing you yawn, repeatedly. As they say yawns are contagious, the moment his neck reclined, and that sinfully chiseled jawline went ajar, the light reflected on a piece of metal that you‘ve never seen before.
“Holy shit
.” Glancing up at him, almost wanting to die as those words physically left your throat instead of staying in your head! Bringing his gaze down to meet yours, brows furrowed in confusion.
“Oh I ugh-I just noticed your tong-” A smirk moved up his face cutting you off mid sentence as he licked his lips before slowly letting the long wet muscle fall from his lips, letting you get a full view. But you couldn’t help notice the shape of it seemed a little..different.
“I got it done almost 3 weeks ago, we've just been video conferencing for all these meetings so you haven’t noticed. This one vibrates when you push it..that’s why it’s a little bigger
” His voice dropped to an octave that made your pussy do the tightest kegal imaginable. The look on his face proved that was kinda what he was aiming for, loving the way your body shuddered against his own.
Your throat felt uncomfortably dry as you gazed up at him, his eyes were locked on yours...dead set on making you fall apart in his arms and it wasn’t taking much. Clearly the universe decide to help you out, as the rest of the group slowly trampled out of the store.  Jungkook leading the way from behind the lense. An almost arrogant smile curled up his face as he pulled back from you, easing back into casual conversation with the rest of the group.
~~~
[C] “Were walking through the airport
.well fuck clearly you can see that, but were heading twoards the termal and I’m reallyyyy exicted!!” A squeak ruptured through your throat as you smiled over in Jungkook's direction. Jimin and Hoseok walking by in unison, fosseying there way towards the terminal Jazz hands, goofy ass expressions and all!
[C] “Kookie make sure you edit in some really dope Casey Neistat , type music, and editing on this part like I wanna look badd assss, slow - mos and all!” Namjoon hopped into frame out of nowhere earning a snort from kookie.
[C] “All right, let's go give it to me...I'll run ahead, and all of you give me your most badass strut and I’ll slow mo and edit that shit to the gods!!!” Kookie did as he said. Running to the end of the termal, counting down from 5 giving you all the signal to walk, and to be honest it was looking great. Until jimin had to end it with a casual almost  “modest” if you will...slut drop upon reaching the end, and of course you couldn't be out done so you joined. Jimin just stayed in the position for a moment almost as if he were gracing the world with the view of his ass, before sticking out his tongue playfully at the camera to his right!
“Buss it down thotiana buss it downnnn” Hoseok cheered from the side at the site of the two of you, forever the hype man, encouraging you to live you best life. An obnoxiously loud cackle left both him and jin’s throat as they no doubt had that on their snap within seconds!
You can hear Jin and Hoseok in the background jokingly making comments about making it rain on both of you asses or something along those lines as you two strutted down the hall.
[C] I’ve never in my life seen Casey do anything like that
EVER” Yoongi’s tone came through the side stale as hell!!
“I mean, I support it, both the left and the right side of it
” Namjoon smirked back in Yoongi’s direction taking in the site of both asses swaying in front of him!
~~~
Jungkook, and Brendan TEAMJTH’s videographer lead the way into the plane first, and it was gorgeous, seating 14 comfortably had a mixture of chairs, couches, and a work space, one bedroom, and bath. In addition to an array of food, drinks and desserts, a special card sitting on the table next to an edible arrangement. Taking a couple pics to quickly upload to your IG account before getting settled .
There was someone from JETTLY waiting as you guys bored, showing you the amenities, introducing you to the pilot and such but there wasn’t a flight attendant present for the trip which was probably in their best interest!
“Strawberry or pineapple?” Taehyung brought his gaze over to Jungkook as he sat the camera on the table..shrugging nonchalantly, trying to hide the smile moving up his face.
“I don’t know surprise me..”
A smirk moving up Tae’s face at that “Close your eyes..” Dropping his voice slightly, as if it didn't already set at a sinful tenor naturally. Walking over to grab a piece of pineapple, biting into it partially to make sure it’s sweet. Flicking his index finger at the youngers bottom lip letting him know to open up, sliding the fruit into his mouth, while letting his finger lingers over his tongue.  Making the younger smile slightly taking the hint, and lapping his tongue gently, fluttering his eyes open with a meek smile.
“You said surprise you
” Taehyung countered letting his lips hover over Jungkook’s before pulling back smugly making his way back over to the edible arrangement. Leaving the younger more than flustered
.
“Alright guys, it’s gonna be a minute before we take off, since you're all finally in one place I need you guys to do one more update about tomorrow’s popup shop. Oh and we were able to get some of your merch there as well!! guys” Jackson, TEAMJTH’S manager spoke up, technically Jin,Hoseok, and Tae were just coming for shits and giggles. The plan originally wasn't a shared tour that’s why there only doing two shows.
But since it’s typical for you guys to have an alternating guest host at least once a month  and your audience loves the threesum it just made sense. Of course since they were coming , pay was worked out, they will be compensated accordingly for the New York and LA shows as well as any of there merch that’s sold. Besides them being your friend’s the five of you just didn't do shady business!
The popup shop would be from 5-10 on the 5th, selling merch and a limited supply of brand collabs the 8 of you have done over the years!
~~~~~~
It was a little after 10 once the jet actually took off, the video was uploaded and your lives got to go on airplane mode! All of you forever grateful for the extremely dim lighting and the fact there were blinds draping the windows. The flight to Miami was about 5 hours and with the time difference by the time you landed it would be rolling on 8pm, you all had a 9:30 dinner meeting with your sponsors so sleeping was crucial.
All of you bundled up in different areas of the plane, the hum of music buzzed through the speakers, while your head laid alone on the couch kiddie-corner at the very back of the room. To be honest it seemed like you were the only one up, the light from your phone catching Jimin’s attention as he invited himself to snuggle up behind you. Sliding your phone out of your hand , placing it on the floor “You need to get some sleep
” the whisper hummed though your ear, as his hand found its home draping over your hip you knew he was right. Eyes burning like hell yet you couldn’t fall asleep

Head covered under an oversized Calvin Klein hoodie, hiding his face in the crook of your neck, while his palm massaged your hip. A slow exhale left your body as you relaxed into his touch, “Fuck, I know..I just hate sleeping on flights!” A humm left his lips at that and you swore you could feel him smirking into your skin, as his hand slipped under the blanket, past the band of your shorts, toying with the hem of your calvins...A low chuckle left your throat, already well aware of were this was going, you kinda expected it just not this soon.
It’s been 4 months since anything sexually has happened between the two of you, and for some reason it only happens when your traveling. Maybe there’s just something in the air , it was in the bathroom at a brand event, in Bora Bora you found yourself on your knees in Moschino and he found himself shamelessly on his in Gucci. It was a great night, needless to say, the two of you ended up buying the outfits afterwards because there was no way in hell they could be returned!
“I’m surprised your over here with me actually
” Your words coming out slightly muffled as you tried to be respectful of the current atmosphere around you.
“And why’s that..” Bringing his hand down to soothe under your ass, while his lips left faint airy kisses down the side of your neck. Teeth grazing the thin chain around your neck, toying it between his teeth.
“Well, with the way you've been eyeing Hoseok the past two days I figured you’d jump on the opportunity to cuddle up under him...”. Turning your head slightly with a playful smirk waiting for him to bring his lips up to meet yours.
“Coming from the woman who almost creamed her panties when she realized he had his tongue pierced today?” Even though he phrased it as a question his tone came off very “matter of factly” leaving no room for debate. Tugging your bottom lip between his teeth, before lapping over it with his tongue,letting the tiny diamond ball of his own dance along your flesh.  “How didn't you notice that last night?” Sucking your lip between his teeth, not even really expecting a response as he dug his nails into your ass, rolling his hips into you until your knead out slightly. Eyes fluttering shut, as you arched back into his touch, grinds your ass into him until you ripped a stifled moan from his throat!
 Sinking his teeth into the side of your neck in response until you dug your nails in his thigh “We have a meeting behave
.”  A deep sigh left his lips but he abided anyway, using his tongue to assault your neck instead.
“I saw the way you were looking at him all night,I don't blame you, I was starting just as hard as you were baby.”  Bringing his hand up to grab your neck, applying  just the right amount of pressure, as his lips teased up your ear. Tugging your hoops between his teeth before sucking a nice little reminder right beneath your ear.
Sliding his hands past your panties to swipe of your clit, a low moan leaving both of your lips “Fuck, Hobi really did get your little pussy wet didint he? Can you imagine how good it would feel to have both of us smothered between your thighs? Telling you how sweet you taste and how good you look while you come.” His lips were literally buried into your ear as he spoke, trying to keep is voice as low as possible, the feeling of his breathe teasing your skin alone had your body shuddering. “God your always so sweet too, you know Hoseok has his cock pierced in 2 places right?”
That alone ripped another moan from your throat as he eased to two fingers in until the rings on his fingers were submerged with you heat. Walls flexing on command as he molded himself around you, curling his fingers upwards to tease at the roof of your pussy. Biting down on your lip so hard you thought you’d draw blood. Thrusting his fingers in and out at an agonizing pace, the girth between the two of them had you arching within seconds , sliding a third finger in and your walls welcomed the stretch effortlessly, as you coated him in your juices. “God your so fuckin’ tight, I bet I got you thinkin about him bending you over -”
“While I have your dick in my mouth? yeah that’s exactly what I’m thinking about. Me wrapping my lips around you until you come down my throat.” The words hissed from your throat as your heat pulsed around him you could almost hear your juices slushing around as he pumped his fingers in and out. “You always look so good when your begging, you turn into such a little slut it’s so sexy.” Now it’s your turn to tease, grabbing his face in your hands pulling his lips down to meet yours. Sliding your tongue into his mouth when you hear him let out an involuntary cry as you start grinding your hips back even harder. Allowing his tongue to map every area in your mouth, the cool sensation from the diamond ball in contrast to the warmth of his tongue has your biting back moans every second. Both of you kissing each other with the same amount of fever , tongues melding against each other, as he exchanged your hole for your clit. Placing the pad of his  fingers  against it before adding steady pressure, as he moved in swift circles.
“Or how about you fucking me, while Hoseok works you open with his fingers, god his hands are so sexy.Until your just begging for him to fuck you, you know how much you love to beg.” A low whine left his throat as he pulled back to lay his tongue flat against your neck, licking a long slow stride before sucking down lightly beneath your chin. Just enough to make you want more, even though you knew he couldn’t...
“Jiminnnn...” You whined slightly reclining your neck even more humming out against your skin in response, lips vibrating against your pulse as if he was actually curious as to why you were calling his name.
“god yes, making you fall apart up under him while you make me cum for you...making a mess all over you cock before he fucks you open with his.” Bringing his lips back over to yours with a slight growl, panting out against his tongue, not allowing yourself to pull away because your afraid of how loud you’ll become, needing his lips and tongue to muffle your cries, as you feel the heat growing in your stomach.
Sliding his oppiste had into your panites, gliding three fingers in knuckle deep, just keeping them stationary, only adding to the immense pressure building in your stomach.
“Your soo good, your fingers are soo good..” Moaning out against his tongue, as low as possible before sucking it into your mouth, his fingers always filled you perfectly, it never took much for him to get you off. Hoping the fact that his hoodie was draping over both of your faces muted out some of the noise.
The neediness dripping from his tongue aren't helping either as you grind your hips into his hand, helping chase your own orgasm. “Fuck I forget much of a promblem this mouth of yours is, your gonna fuck around and make me come from that alone, god your so fuckin sexy
” You could feel him start to build up momentum his fingers started working even faster, needing to feel you come just as bad as you “Your dripping down my hand right now, fuck I just wanna taste you, make you come all over my face.”
Burying your face in the crook of his neck, sinking your teeth into the base merissily, edging you towards your release. “That’s it, fuck yourself on my fingers baby, I can feel how tight your clit is, come for me, come nice and hard for me
.” Panting out gainst his your hair as your muscles started to seeze biting down on his neck disgustly hard as you came

 body shuddaring in his embrase as he contiuned working your clit, easing you through your orgasm “Fuck yes, just like that...keep comming for me baby” No matter how sensetive you were you still kept rocking abck agaisnt him, his dick impposibly hard in his pants until you heard a low growl leave his chest. You knew Jimin well enough to know there was a 99% chance he just came
.
A low chuckle left your throat at that ...reaching down in his pants as he swirled his fingers in yours. It was like the two of you worked off of one brain cell, brinings your fingers up to each others mouths, lapping your tongues around the digits effortlessly before bringing your lips together. Moaning out simultaneously the two of you tasted each other, the kiss was slow and lazy, letting his tongue have it’s way you as you were spent at this point. Eyes so heavy you almost couldn't open them once he pulled away “Get some sleep
” the words brushed against your lips with a lazy smile before kissing the tip of your nose. The scent of you rolling off his tongue as he spoke. “My entire bodies pliant right now...I don't have a choice, I’m not moving and neither are you!”
Placing one more kiss along your lips before readjusting the two of you under the blankets, before well needed sleep effortlessly washed over your bodies.
~~~~~
The feeling of someone’s hand roaming through your hair is what had your eyes breaking apart. It wasn’t Jimin though you knew what he felt like. These hands were longer, but equally delicate, eyes flutter up to see it was Taehyung. With a camera. Dead in your face.
[C] “Were hereeeee..” The words left his lips sing song like, back to his normal playful self, clearly sleep did him well. Soothing his palm over you back as you grumbled in dismay burying your face back in the blanket...until you remember the discomfort sitting in your panties from earlier, and you instantly felt the desire to hop up and run to the bathroom!
Stepping into the bathroom too quickly wipe down with a towel swamping out your underwear, putting a soiled ones in a bag and sliding them in your cosmetic bag. Upon walking out of course Hoseok would be the one waiting to use the bathroom.
Resting against the wall, shirt long gone, as his hands sat casually in his pockets, the look on his face just felt like he knew something. Or maybe you just felt awkward because you and Jimin got off to the idea of having a threesom with the man in front of you!
“Did you sleep well?”
“I ugh, yeah, yeah I did ..you?” Hoping to god your voice didn't come out as shaky as it felt.
Another all knowing smirk moved up his face, with a slight shrug “Meh, I mean...it couldve been better
.” Easing his back off the wall to talk past you, body dusting against yours slightly as he entered the bathroom.  Allowing you to get a full view of beautifully done back piece, Hosoek had one tattoo, and the thing was HUGE...taking up a good 70 percent of his extremely muscular back. It was an extremely detailed leopard, with a tone of tropical themed flowers around it. He got it done in Thailand..about 2 years ago over the span of 3 day!
The minute you returned to the main area Jimin’s eyes met yours exchanging the same look before randomly bursting out into a fit of laughter causing everyone else to glare in your direction. THIS is why the two of you were able to have sex every once on and while, because once it was over..it was over, the two of you were able to just revert back as if nothing ever happened! Walking over to investigate your damage,  yanking his hoodie to the side, thankfully the brutal mark was low enough on his shoulder that any shirt with sleeves would cover it! But fuck if it wasn;t the deepest shade of purple imagiabele, a hiss left your lips at the site of it.
“Don’t worry about it, you know how much I get off on pain..” The words were barely audible as whispered out into your hair. Pulling back from you with a smirk, walking over to pack his blankets and such back in his luggage.
~~~
Once the plane officially settled and the 10 of you made your way to the airbnb it was pushing 8:30, and luckily the sponsors had a feeling this would happen and pushed dinner back to 10. But that still didn't leave MUCH time for getting ready.
Upon pulling up you all recognized the house, it was the “Santorini” very popular amongst influencers as it had 5 bedoroms 4 baths, nine bed all together, a hot tub, pool the full nine. Unfortunately you lot were far too rushed to explore or even pick out rooms, recognizing the car that was waiting outside thankful it was the hair and makeup duo you reached out to weeks ago through IG to do your glam while in Miami.
The house was a mess within seconds, all of you running around throwing clothes everywhere trying to find what you needed, the ten of you had never gotten ready so fast in your lives.
Jungkook and Brenden were ready first, within 20 minutes tops, the least high maintenance of the group, whipping out there cameras as they watched all the casos unfold. Even Though 80% would have to be cut as there were a lot of naked and or half naked bodies running through this house!
It was only a matter of time before Jackson and Yoongi were screaming that the car was outside and you all needed to leave ..NOW!
[FILMING]
“Fuck where are my shoes!?
“Who has hairspray, that won’t make my hair look flakey on my hair!?”
“Kim-Tae-fucking-hyung are you wearing my Saint Laurent boots!?”
“NO! My feet are bigger than yours ya dick!”
Everything and everyone was a damn mess, yelling from all ends of the house, no one really sure who the other was actually speaking too!
“Ahhh shit I gotta go I gotta gooo..” You found yourself running away from your glam team as they chased behind you with hairspray and fix plus,trying to spray you down in the process “Someone zip this pleaseee
” The first person you ran by was Namjoon, his silk paisley shirt sitting slightly unbuttoned giving you a sneak peek at his toned chest while reaching behind to zip up your dress.
[FILMING] ‘Shit I don't know if I like thissss..” You knew that whine anywhere it was Jimin giving himself a one over in the mirror.
[FILMING] “Your ass looks delectable Jiminie we gotta gooooo!!!” The praise came from Namjoon making the younger blush slightly as he licked his cherry stained lips, not hesitating to look at his ass in the frame one more time before abiding. Confidence instantly back on a hundred as he smirked, swaying away from the mirror while running his fingers through his hair.
~~~~
The 10 of you pilled into 3 luxury Ubers arriving to the “Lobster Bar Sea Grille” About 10 minutes late but hey, you tried, Jimin and yourself strutted together, the last two to hop out of the car. Hoseok came over casually draping his hand over Jimin’s shoulder. “I like these pants on you Jimine
” tone calm as ever as his hand gently brushed up Jimin’s thigh, making the older chuckle upon feeling his muscles tense under his hold.
Turning his head upwards slightly to meet Hoseok’s gaze, letting his tongue play at the corner of his mouth “Yea, I can say the same about you,they make your thighs look really good” Jimin’s voice dropped a little, adding that slightly whiny twang that never failed to get him his way! Eye’s shamelessly  trailing up Hoseok’s body
A humm leaving Hosoek’s lips in response as his hand coily trailed down Jimin’s back, the slight whimper that left Jimin’s throat the lower he got didn't go unnoticed. Once Hoseok's hand reached his ass he didn't hesitate to squeeze it firmly in his palm until the younger knead out slightly.  Pulling back with a smirk “Let’s ugh..go knock this meeting out so yeah?” Lips hovering over Jimin’s ear as he whispered into his skin. A low rumble ruptured through his chest at the way the younger was just putty in his hands. Typically Jimin had this effect on everyone else, he’s not used to being knocked on his ass, Hoseok’s a completely different type of creature that’s for damn sure. This time giving his ass a couple playful smacks before jogging over to Jin and Taehyung as the walked through the restaurant's doors.
“What. The. Fuck. Was. That.” Glancing over at Jimin with a smile, honestly you were kinda rooting for this, lord knowns he’s wanted to fuck Hoseok since they met.
“I have no idea, but if that mans dick isn't in my mouth by the end of the night..I’mma lose my shitt!!”
Upon walking in and exchanging hugs there appeared to only be seating left on either side of Hoseok..Jimin and yourself couldn't help but laugh as you took your seats, something tells me this was not a quisedence.
While Tae was next to jungkook Yoongi was sandwiched between Jin and Namjoon, and Jackson, and brenden were sitting in between the two Mike, and Jordan. They were behind the company sponsoring the actual aesthetic of the tour. Meaning they were the ones transforming these venues into the atmosphere all of your fans were walking into. Everything from lighting,seating, the podcast “set” the full nine. Each city was set to have it’s on vibe so none of the ‘set’s would look the same!
The night went well, not that you were surprised, you all knew time and place, and sitting in front of two men who were putting a shit ton of money into your tour was a place to act like professionals. But then midnight rolled around, and that’s when everyone started to get a little laxed Jimin and yourself were one in the same. The familiar smirk that tugged on his pouty lips as he sat in deep conversation with Hoseok told you to look under the table.
Only to find his fingers gently teasing over Hoseok’s cock through his pants, trickling up and down his zipper. Casually bringing his hand down to soothe up his inner thigh, fingers getting dangerously close to his length. Admiring the way Jimin kept gazing at him, the glint in his eyes were the perfect combination of innocent and sin all at the same time. You couldn't even help the smirk that tugged on your cheeks, feeling somewhat proud of you friend for finally going after what he’s wanted.
The sponsors left and graciously covering the bill, while the rest of you shifted outside towards the bar which set right off the water. But you couldn't help but notice Jimin get up to go to the bathroom, only for Hosoek to follow seconds later.
~~~~~~~
Walking in to find the younger pressed against the counter raking his fingers through his hair, not forgetting to arch slightly with a cheeky grin once his eyes zooned in on Hoseok.
Tsking lowly as he shook his head, one hand in his pocket as he strolled over causally “Such a little cock tease huh?” Smacking his ass so hard, even Hoseok moaned out at the sting, pulling a sharp gasp from Jimin’s body.  Making him fall forward chuckling lightly as he braced his weight on his elbows, grinding back into Hoseok. Turning his head slightly as his tongue flicked the roof of his mouth, locking his eyes with the elder as he felt him, digg his thumbs into his hips before grinding his clothed cock into Jimin ass.
Making Jimin moan out shamelessly sucking his plum bottom lip into his mouth as he zoned in on his own reflection.
“Ohhh, you like watching yourself get fucked? You like seeing how pretty you look while your bent over like a little slut getting fucked into the counter?” Rolling his hips a little deeper with a growl, bringing his hand up to take a firm hold on Jimin’s sinfully thick neck.
Brining Jimin’s body flesh to his, Hoseok’s blunt teeth sunk deep into a pulse point, making the younger strangle out a high breathy moan that bounced off every surface of marble in this bathroom.
“Fuck”. Hosek bit his lip, snaking his tongue down the side of Jimin’s neck to ease the sting, his body shuddering at the feeling of the metal brushing against his skin. “You sound so fuckin good and I haven’t even touched you yet
I wonder what you’ll sound like if IIII
..”
Finally bringing his hand down to cup Jimin’s throbbing cock as he rolled his hips into him electing another needy whine from his throat bringing something almost primal out of Hoseok’s body! “Jiminnnn, baby fuck...” The tone in his voice reflected as if he was in pain, which he was, his dick was ready to fucking explode.
The pet name and sudden hint of neediness in Hoseok’s voice had Jimin turning into complete mush in his hold.
Taking Jimin’s hand in his own, pulling back just enough to let Jimin squeeze his cock in his hands through the almost painfully tight fabric, making it twitch a couple times, and he swore Jimin’s knees went limp.
“You want it
” Phrasing the question more as a statement , as he turned Jimin’s head waving his tongue into his mouth, making the younger respond instantly swirling it around the muscle. Hoseok’s hand made its way back to the front of Jimin’s body , soothing it down his chest,before palming his length again. “Soo sexy
” slurred out against Jimin’s mouth, as he sucked his plum bottom lip between his teeth.
Jimin was the one to break away from the kiss “I’m over having your tongue in my mouth , I need your cock” Tone exceptionally bratty, nipping at the elders chiseled jawline,rolling his hips back even deeper “You want me on my knees here or at home?”
THAT’S ALL SHE WROTE FOR NOW! LOL
(Since this is the first chapter I kinda forgot that this one would be the longest for obvious reasons! So I decided I didn't wanna make this like 16 k...cut it off at 9.5 and if this is received well, Miami will be done in 2 parts. So if you enjoyed this and want more...show some love and hit up my ask.
BACKSTORY
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