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periracha · 11 months ago

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Waiting

☾ pairing: Dad!Chan x Mom!Reader ☾ wc: 2k ☾ genre: fluff, boring domesticity (gasp) ☾ cw: Christmas themes, kids, suggestive jokes, me trying to be funny idk, language, chan being chan ☾ summary: the bangs get in the holiday spirit! ☾ a/n: wanted to get a whole aesthetic and masterlist up for this blog before i posted anything but this little idea had my brain in a chokehold all day so,,,,enjoy ! also, let me know if I should continue writing this family so i can give them names, etc. yes this piece is fluff but this blog is 18+, MDNI

Ripples start to splash against the inside of your mug as you set it down on the coffee table that has been pushed aside for the evening to allow enough room for you and your husband.

“Clearing the living room floor the second both kids are down and out?” Chan asks with a wiggle of his eyebrow.

“Bit risky but I can work with this” he says while straining his neck and pulling his left arm across his chest in a stretch in preparation.

You look up at him when a scoff falls from your lips, “ha yeah you wish. Now get the wrapping paper from the closet”

“Please” you add with a sarcastic smile and sweet like honey tone.

He blinked at you silently for a split second before he huffed out a big sigh, “Oh thank god. I don’t think my back could handle these hardwood floors like it used to” he finishes as he makes his way to the hallway closet.

“Mmm unfortunately the only action these floors have been getting lately is spilled juice and probably some dusty cheetos the kids kicked under the couch” you joke as Chan meets you on the floor with wrapping supplies and gifts.

A quiet laugh in agreement leaves his lips.

“She’s gonna love this” Chan says with a grin so wide it meets his eyes.

He’s holding up a Bluey plushie that plays a few catchphrases from the show when its paw is squeezed.

“She better…. I’m running out of reasons why she can’t buy it every time we go to the store” you say as you cut wrapping paper big enough to wrap the doll and hand it to him.

Your daughter had wanted this little plushie for months now, always asking to stop by the toy section whenever you visit your local department store. You quickly learned that simply telling her the store didn’t have anymore wasn’t gonna fly with her. She always found a way to swindle you into the toy aisles, finding the plushie every time. Distracting her with books or other small toys could only get you so far; luckily Christmas was only a few days away and you both would soon see the joy on her face when she opened her gift.

“How do you even wrap these things??” Chan huffed out with a bewildered look on his face; his brows drawn tight and his eyes wide open. The piece of wrapping paper you had given him was creased all over, and covered in way too many pieces of tape that didn’t actually do anything to keep the paper together.

A giggle started in your chest but you choked it down with a fake cough. Chan was used to being good at almost anything he put his mind to.

Dancing? Easy.

Singing? No Problem.

Writing thousands of unique songs that differed in their own ways? Piece of cake.

Sports? Absolutely.

Wrapping a small gift for his three year old daughter? Not so much.

Carefully, you took the small doll from his hand and replaced it with a box of bath toys for your son.

“Here, let me handle this…and you wrap these” you said nonchalantly as soon as you made the switch; immediately working on your new task at hand.

Chan gawked at you with a goofy smile on his face, “You don’t think I can do it?...you’re demoting me to only wrapping boxes?” he laughed while feigning offense.

“No no no!”, you waved off, “you’re just soooo good! Better than me! The best actually!” you rushed out while trying to contain your laughter but ultimately failing.

Chan looked at you with pointed eyes, but had a wide smile plastered on his face the entire time. He looked like he was going to say something in retaliation but decided against it, letting out a small chuckle and shaking his head instead while he got to work on the box.

Many presents later you were both feeling the ache deep in your lower back from hunching over on the floor.

“Okay that's enough for me, I’m tapping out,” Chan said stretching his back with a yawn.

You yawned and simply shook your head up and down in agreement, thinking about how you were too tired to even keep your eyes open.

You got up and gathered all your wrapping supplies to store away.

“Oh! Can you take all those and put them under the tree?” you asked him while pointing to the group of gifts.

He hummed a quick mhm and started gathering them in his arms.

“Make sure to put Bluey on top of the one of the taller presents so they can’t get to it” you called out as you made your way to your room.

“Yep, got it” Chan quickly responded before placing all the presents down and making his way to follow you to your bedroom.

The next day went blissfully as usual; waking up way too early to cries before the sun is even fully out, only to finally get your son back down and you barely back in bed before your daughter barges in demanding French toast stat.

Did you even have all the ingredients for french toast?

You already got one kid handled, Chan could handle this one.

You lightly kicked him in the leg as he laid beside you to wake him up before you made yourself comfortable to fall back asleep.

When you did wake up, you grabbed your son and met your husband and daughter in the living room, setting him down to crawl around the rug.

“Good morning love”, Chan greeted you with a kiss to your cheek and sliding his arms around your waist in a loose hug.

You hummed a good morning back before resting your head against his chest.

“My turn! My turn!” your daughter yelled entirely too close to your eardrum as she stood on the couch in an attempt to be as eye level as she could with you.

“Coffee?” Chan asked with a smirk as he let you go and made his way to the kitchen.

“Ohhh yeah” you answered before turning your attention fully on your daughter.

She puckered her lips and stood on her tiptoes in an attempt to copy her dad’s previous actions. You bent down and she kissed your cheek, “Good morning, mommy!”, she giggled before flopping down on the couch.

“Oh it is a good morning!” you smiled back to her before tickling her to get some hugs in.

Chan met you back in the living room with your fresh cup of coffee as you both sat on the couch, watching your children play together in the early morning hours.

Your son crawled towards the christmas tree and before you could get up to grab him he had already bumped into a few presents, causing one of them to go off.

“Hello! Hehehe”

The noise immediately caught your daughter's attention and her head snapped towards the tree before her eyes widened. You could see the wheels starting to turn in her head to try and make sense of what just happened when you looked over at Chan who was sporting a mortified look. Jaw hung open and downward, eyes widening and moving around the room at everyone’s faces.

The damn Bluey doll had gone off and one of her most wanted presents was most likely spoiled now.

“WHAT WAS THAT?” she rushed out, walking closer to the tree.

“Your brother!” Chan blurted out way too quickly before tightening his lip into a flat line, realizing what he just did.

Your daughter stopped dead in her tracks and looked at the both of you.

“What???” she asked again, her eyes darting between yours and Chan’s a few times.

“He can talk??, “ she screamed, bewildered at the new information being thrown at her all too quickly, pointing at him and eyes wide as saucers.

You let out a huff of air and forced yourself to take a sip of your coffee, hoping to buy you some time, waiting for your brain to kick on. It was too early for this.

Chan looked at you waiting for you to come in and save the conversation but you had nothing. How were you supposed to convince a 3 year old that her 8 month old brother could now speak when he’s never done that before.

You’re on your own here. You thought to yourself as your eyes met Chan’s again. His face still stuck in the same shocked expression.

“Uhh…yeah..yeah…?” Chan tried to get out nonchalantly but it ended up coming out more like a question and high pitched tone, before clearing his throat.

Your son had now crawled toward your daughter and started grabbing at her legs to get her attention.

You needed a moment to think but your daughter would absolutely follow you wherever you went to…. Unless…?

You coughed into your arm dramatically, “ooooh mommy needs medicine, I will be right back” you said before quickly standing up and making your way to the hallway cabinets before she could stop you.

Even the possibility of being around cough medicine, seeing it with her own eyes, was enough to keep your daughter from following you. She was not about to risk having to take that, yucky grape stuff, as she likes to call it.

Chan followed after you, staying in the open area to keep an eye on the two kids.

“So our 8 month old is saying full words now is he?” you asked, raising your eyebrows when he got closer to you.

“I panicked okay!”, he screamed in a hushed tone.

“So you blame it on the baby?!” you asked in disbelief, a laugh starting in the bottom of your throat. You tightened your lips in an effort to stop the smile you knew was coming.

“What else was I supposed to say it came from?” Chan asked with a strained laugh, “you were no help!” he accused, pointing his finger and narrowing his gaze.

“I don’t know Chan! The TV? Your phone?” you huffed out off the top of your head and throwing your hands in the air.

“Hm. yeah that would’ve been good”, he said staring at the floor, realizing just how easy those would’ve been to explain away to a child.

He stepped back from you to get a better look at your kids a few steps away. His brow furrowed so you stepped forward to see what he was looking at.

Your daughter was sitting directly across from your son with a serious expression on her face, no more playing going on in sight.

“What..what are you guys doing?” Chan asked loud enough for your kids to hear.

Your daughter looked back at him, “Waiting,” she said matter of factly before refocusing her attention back on her brother.

“Waiting foorrr?” Chan asked, raising his eyebrows as you both took a step toward them.

“Him to talk again” she answered without bothering to even look at Chan this time, her serious gaze never leaving her brother's face. He was babbling and drooling while playing with the legs of her pajama pants.

You both couldn’t contain the laughs that came from your mouths. Today was going to be a long day.

You couldn’t wipe the smile from your face as you thought about your family’s antics. Never a boring day in the Bang household, but you wouldn’t have it any other way.

“Hey Chan, what did you do with the matching talking Bingo we wrapped last night?”

“Shit”

©periracha, 2023.

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itjazzbicch · 1 year ago

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Not Jealous

Pairing: Hwoarang x Fem Reader

First time writing for Hwoarang, so I hope I did well!

Summary: It's supposed to be a friends' night at the club, but when the reader accidentally bumps into someone whom her best friend, Hwoarang, doesn't like, Hwoarang realizes something within himself that leads to the two connecting in a new way after the reader calls him out for acting jealous...

Warnings: SMUT! (18+ ONLY! MINORS & AGELESS BLOGS DNI! YOU WILL BE BLOCKED!) Some drinking, foreplay, unprotected sex (wrap it before ya tap it!) Public sex (in a closet) (Also, the 'guy at the bar' is totally not Jin 😂)

Word Count: 1.5k

"Hey, I'm going to grab another drink. Want anything?"

"Yeah, my usual!" Hwoarang spat out, too busy laughing with the rest of his friends

He would always get the same drink, and I knew what I wanted, having to cram against the crowded bar. It was so loud that I had to lean over the bar top and yell my order to the bartender, accidentally bumping someone.

"Oh goodness, I'm sorry!" I hurried to apologize, finding a black-haired man in a biker jacket next to me, his eyes peeking through his bangs:

"It's crowded. Don't worry about it."

"Very crowded," I chuckled nervously, getting my drinks and smiling before I left, "You have a good one!"

"You too," He smiled back softly, waving as I left.

Returning to all my friends, they were still lively except for Hwoarang, who was staring at something with a scowl on his face as I held out his drink:

"Your usual."

He was hyper-focused on whatever he was staring at, leaning to get in his face and tease, "Want me to drink it instead?"

"Thanks," Finally taking his drink, he was still staring out to the crowd of people, so I asked as I sat next to him:

"What's your deal? What are you staring at?"

He ignored me, and more questions flooded my mind when I sat, and his arm went around my shoulders; trying to look in the same direction, I saw that guy that I bumped into at the bar, his eyes locked with Hwoarang's.

That's when it clicked in my head, nearly spilling my drink as I started laughing.

"What's so funny?" Hwoarang was confused by my laughter, and I kept things straightforward:

"Are you jealous because I talked to that guy at the bar?"

How his cheeks turned red with a sour look had me rolling, jumping at his hand falling and pinching my side, mumbling under his breath:

"Jealously is when you're upset about something you don't have. So, no. I'm not jealous."

Good thing I had my drink, taking a big sip for some liquid courage before asking:

"Oh, so you think you have me?"

Gazing past the orange strand of hair against his nose, we've never stared at each other so deeply, glancing at that guy still at the bar and then back to Hwoarang:

"Don't like the way he smiled at me or something?"

"I don't like that guy," That was obvious, glaring at him once more before turning back to me with a cocky smirk, hand latched to my hip and pulling me closer, "And yeah, I'm pretty sure I have you."

Why did I feel so hot suddenly? I didn't even realize how heavy my breaths were as he just smirked at me, beginning to lean closer, but both of us stopped as our friends made their presence known and teased:

"Geez! Get a room!"

So much embarrassment overtook me; a part of me wanted to kick their asses for ruining that moment for me. Hwoarang was about to kiss me, and that's what they do?!

"I'm gonna run to the restroom," I said quickly, standing and speedwalking off, but Hwoarang was right behind me. I heard him yell at our friends before speaking to me:

"Wait a second!"

I made it to the restroom area first, seeing a closet in the hall. Opening it quickly, there was just some cleaning supplies on some shelves against the back wall, keeping it open a little as Hwoarang came around, groaning:

"You're seriously running off because they said that?"

"No, they told us to get a room," Grabbing his hand, he knew what I was planning, stepping into the closet and shutting the door, "So, I got us one. Kind of."

"Haha!" He laughed at me, standing against the door, "You having an idea like this?"

"You're the one who was going to kiss me. What did you expect?" I shot back, his silence worrying me, "What? Were you only going to do it to show-boat for that du-"

I was rattled by the goosebumps that covered me, already gone into bliss as his lips smacked into mine, my back hitting the wall, snapping me back into reality, his voice low and deep as he found my eyes in the darkness:

"That guy only made me realize something. That's all."

I couldn't stand the seriousness anymore; all the actions that led us here had an obvious meaning, and a nightclub closet wasn't the place where I'd like to spill my heart out, so I grabbed him by the jacket, kissing him and playing around:

"Give me something good in here, and I just might take you home."

"Good one," He chuckled, pressing his lips hard, the metal clanking of his belt making me look down, his alluring whisper having me melt against the wall, "When I'm done, you'll be begging me to come home with you."

Squeezing the back of my thighs and rubbing his way up my shirt, I instinctively bit his lip the second his hands cupped my ass, squeezing then spreading apart for a finger to slide against my panties and feel their dampness.

"I think it's time to ditch these," He toyed, pulling at my panties. As soon as I wiggled out of them, I was moaning against his chest at the way his finger slid through my folds, finding my clit; my head quickly fixed upward against the wall as he kissed and nibbled at my neck, pumping his finger into me, "That's better."

"Hwoarang-" Biting my lip, I looked at the light peaking under the door, knowing that there was a chance we could get caught and in terrible trouble.

"You like that, yeah?" His arrogance went through the roof from the second I started moaning, adding another finger and pumping faster, burying every knuckle and wiggling to hit my sweet spot.

"Yeah!" I moaned louder, trying to get my point across as I found his waistband, feeling something hard and warm, looking to see his leather pants were already undone, his cock pressed against his briefs hard, desperate for escape, "If we're gonna do this, we'll have to be quick."

"Turn around," He knew I was right, tapping my ass as did as I was told, one hand pushing my skirt up to my hips, feeling the warmth of the other between us, hearing his leaking thoughts come out in whispers, "Knew this skirt would look a lot better like that."

"You were checking me out before?" Turning my head to smirk, my jaw dropped, a high-pitched gasp flying out, "Oh my gosh!"

"Oh my gosh, is right," Even with my eyes shut tight, I knew that his cocky smirk was fixed on me, stuffing my soaked cunt with his cock in just a single thrust, pulling back just a little and the flesh of my ass and thighs rippled when his hips smacked against me, "Can barely take me."

"Hwoa-" Pressing my hands against the wall as hard as I could, it was hard to fight gravity, back arching and perking myself toward him as he went faster and turned me into a sloppy mess, forehead sweating against the wall too, "Shit!"

My upper body started to dip lower and lower, hearing him groan pleasurably once I was at a certain angle, spanking me and smiling:

"There you go; take this cock, baby."

Standing was becoming a real challenge, trying to focus on all the good tingles I felt, how quickly the tip of his cock was hitting every right spot, but looking as there seemed to be a lot of commotion outside the door.

He noticed too, an arm wrapping around my chest to hold me upright, his free hand finding my clit, ruthlessly rubbing, and it sent me into a frenzy, squirming and my walls squeezing his cock hard as I squealed:

"Hwoarang!"

"I know you're gonna cum," He whispered in my ear, covering my mouth and ramming his cock faster, "As soon as we slip out of here, we'll leave, okay? Together."

I only nodded, eyes rolling back as screams muffled into his hand from how he was deep fucking me, panting hard into his hand, my heart beating in my head and seeing stars, but hearing his whispers echoed into the bass of the music outside the door:

"Oh yeah, baby. Definitely taking you home for round two."

His thrusts slowed but were still deep, needing to feel how hard I came around his cock, drenched and my legs shaking with an ache in my knees, finally getting the air I needed as he pulled back and moved his hand from my mouth.

"I n-need a second, Hwoa-" I breathed in deep, resting against the wall as I fixed my skirt, smiling at his hands rubbing my back, giving me the moment I needed, ready to sneak out, but doubling checking as I cocked my eyebrow at him and recalled, "So, we really going home for round two?"

"Hell yeah," He smirked and winked, "I still haven't gotten my fix. You're in for it."

2023 © itjazzbicch — do not repost or translate my work. Likes, reblogs, and comments are always welcome

#tekken #tekken x reader #tekken x y/n #tekken imagine #tekken fanfic #tekken fanfiction #tekken fic #tekken smut #tekken oneshot #hwoarang #hwoarang x reader #hwoarang x y/n #hwoarang imagine #hwoarang smut #hwoarang oneshot #hwoarang fanficiton #hwoarang fanfic #hwoarang fic #read and enjoy

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n04hfiction · 1 year ago

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hello:)! this is for the shipping post :D! i hope u have a good rest of ur day !! My name is genesis, but my friends call me gen 😽!! I am mexican American and my mother tongue is spanish:). I am the youngest out of 5 kids.

4 my physical appearance : I have straight brown hair, big green eyes, pale skin,and a shit ton of freckles! I also wear glasses. I have curtain bangs as well👍🏻. I do have muscles but its the most visible on my arms tho 😽 i am 5’1 .

4 my style: Most of my clothes are hand me downs from my siblings🤧 so i dont really know. I usually wear at my house is a tank top and some men shorts. When i’m going out i wear cargo pants/jeans/shorts and a random t-shirt/tank top. When its cold i wear my brothers clothes 😭😭Like some black jeans , a random hoodie , and a puffer jacket and a beanie. When i have special events i wear 2000s type dresses and a pair of my sisters heels. My friends say my aesthetic is kinda of the spiderman in the spider verse? Yeah kinda like that so idk 🤷‍♀️. But i have a pair of green nikey shoes my mom gave me. And those were the first shoes my mom gave me that were new 😭😭so those r the shoes i wear. I wear a gold dog pendant (like the rectangle ones) That has the date of when my dad passed away. I wear that all the time c:

4 hobbies : I LOVE DRVING SO MUCH :DD !! I saved moved a lot of money and after a few pay checks from working, I got my first car 😸!! I love listening to music! Tupac,kaili uchis, winsin y yandel, joji, steve lacy are my current favs <3. I like drawing once in a while 2 :]. But driving is so much fun i luv it

4 personality : I am a pisces and extroverted! My friend says i’m kind and funny. My mom said that i am a “young dumb person with a smart mind and a lot like ur dad”😟. My 2 sisters say that i’m a “very forgiving person, and playful, but I need to think abt stuff more instead of being impulsive.” My 2 brother says that i’m “funny , smart, loyal but u have a temper”. My love language is quality time and acts of service :). Also being annoying 😭 like if i hug someone , i am gonna tickle them until it hurts, or if ur taking a nap , im gonna come in and blast daddy yankee and wake u up, Or ur sitting on the couch , i’ll go sit in ur lap and get comfy 🤧🤧

i ship you with sapnap!!

sapnap will take your glasses and either hide them or put them on his face and refuse to take them off XD he lowkey loves doing it, especially if you can’t see that well without them, cuz he’s a little shit most of the time, but it’s all in good fun

he also loves that your style is just a mix of your siblings hand-me-downs, because he loves to throw his clothes at you and saying, “here, hand-me-downs” he also loves buying matching clothes as well as sharing clothes. sometimes when going through your closet he’ll find a bunch of clothes he forgot he gave to you XD

and in one of my previous sapnap posts i mentioned that sapnap is a passenger princess who loves to scream to his fav songs as loud as possible xD so that definitely applies. your guy’s drives are usually late night ones. so i can imagine when the windows are rolled down and it’s hella late he’ll scream his favorite songs pretty obnoxiously lmfao some bystanders get kind of annoyed lmfao

he loves your kind and cherishing personality, but he thinks your (supposed) temper is funny XD he does enjoy teasing you for it ajsjsjnsns

and he is def the kind of person who loves to exist separately if that makes sense, like be in the same room doing different tasks, and he loves doing simply things for you. especially cooking

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thelaithlyworm · 1 year ago

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First sentence game

Rule: Share the first sentence of your ten most recent fics.

(Tagged by @evilasiangenius )

All he knows is snow. - from How Zhang Qiling Comes Down the Mountain which is currently at the top of my feed because I recently did a podfic of it. (The mountain is very real, but it is also a metaphor. And there’s breakfast! (Which is also real, and is also a metaphor.))

It is very peaceful, on Tongluo Mountain. - from It Is Very Peaceful, on Tongluo Mountain - prequel fic for Back From The Brink - how a very woebegone little dragon king was rescued by a daft old lady, and partly how small town life goes.

When Hei Xiazi heard that Jiu-ye was dying he was in a backroom bar in Vietnam, ducking under strings of flypaper and slipping by a charcoal brazier the room didn’t really need in the gentle throes of the southern winter. - from Joy for the brother sun - Of a tired, often-penniless immortal who hears that one of the few people who remember him from when he was young is dying, and the journey he makes to get to the man’s deathbed. And what he finds there.

“Do you have any good rhymes for ‘silver’, d’Artagnan?” - from Song of Songs - Also dragged higher up the queue on account of podfic. D’Artagnan, raw youth, bemoans his tragic lovelife while Aramis, older sophisticate, talks obliquely about his. There’s poetry!

It was a modern set of flats, with the rooms set tight as the cells in a honeycomb and little balconies poking out like bug-legs on the outside wall. - from The Eggs Have It - Again with Hei Xiazi, this time with his old student pawning his new student off on Hei-ye for training, the nerve! the impudence! (It’s kind of a funny story but with teeth here and there.) … In canon, Hei-ye’s existence - both extremely competent and weirdly poverty-stricken - comes with his plot significance like a fragrance does flowers. Like the Brother Sun story, it seemed appropriate to start with something reflecting his physical circumstances. Also, I like the weirdly organic descriptions Xu Lei gives to inorganic things sometimes.

Wu Xie woke awkwardly, slowly, to the calls of blackbirds and what might possibly be the wheeze of a dying bear. - from A World Made Over, Fresh and New - So this is kind of a silly story, and most of it is about Wu Xie being a little ridiculous, so I wanted to start strong.

This fragment of internet ephemera – a pastiche of The Classic of Mountains and Seas – shares some of the delightfully weird world building of Sand Sea (pub. Mustard-Seed Press, Xiamen) and is generally considered to be written by Sand Sea’s author, Guan Gen - also the unattributed co-author of the minor action movie Time Raiders (2016). - from Excerpt from: The Classic of Mountains Underground, attributed to Guan Gen - Not gonna lie, I was inspired by A Field Guide to Dragons of the Circumpolar Arctic (excerpts) by Sholio which doesn’t just have fascinating dragon lore but starts with a chunk of detail about the researcher, academia-style, and it all makes it feel very very real. (It also comes with a delightful podfic! *waggles eyebrows*) And - thinking about which parts of the dmbj series exist as texts inside the dmbj series is hilarious.

They tie you by your wrists and by your ankles and throw you down the tunnel. - from Blood From A Stone - Written at a point of dmbj canon where Zhang Qiling Is Really Not Having A Good Time…

“Damn Pangzi, this is all your fault,” Liu Sang hissed. - from Damn Pangzi - Also not gonna lie, Liu Sang and Wang Pangzi’s bickering energy gives me life.

The pinpoint lights of the chandeliers overhead skimmed into lines as A-Ning stormed out of the ballroom, the delicate wrist of a server pincered between her fierce fingers. - from In the Closet - A-Ning, so forceful of you…

Tagging (if you wish to be tagged): @procrastinatorproject @jazzfic @foxofninetales @merinnan @alxina

#memes #fic

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jodilin65 · 32 years ago

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MONDAY, JUNE 29, 1992 Got a letter today from Lisa.

I’m still working on a tan. I have a definite start but I still need much more. Donna’s been taking care of that and making it less boring cuz we talk about this and that. She’s very nice and very pretty. She’s 29, married and lives in Andy’s old apartment. She’s got it beautifully decorated and it’s a nice apartment.

If I made an extra $50 a month, I’d have taken a 1-bedroom. I could use the extra space and it’s what I’m used to. It has extra closet space I could use and a humongous walk-in closet in the bedroom. That thing could pass off as a whole separate room itself. Maybe someday. Where I am now is fine with no furniture, but more of a life.

Mom’s sending a TV. Wish I had shelves, a small table, and maybe a loveseat, too.

Later…

Donna is very pretty and she knows I think so and that I’m gay. She’s 5’ 8” and slightly chunky. She says she weighs 148 pounds but she doesn’t look it. She’s very solid. She’s got a nice tan and she’s part Hispanic and part German. She and her husband’s parents speak Hispanic, but they don’t. Believe it or not, there are a lot of Hispanic people who don’t speak Hispanic. It’s a funny thought knowing that if she wanted to know how to say something in Spanish, she’d have to come ask me.

She has large dark brown eyes and dark brown curly hair almost to the middle of her back. She’s very friendly and open and easy to talk to. She’s a conversationalist like I am but shares a lot of the same fears and feelings as I do. She’s not too trusting of people. When I first told her I was gay, she was shocked due to the fact that I’m so feminine. Of course, that’s nothing new for me. All she’s ever known before were gay guys and butches. She told me that even though she’s madly attracted to dark guys, there once was this gorgeous woman she saw. I guess she and her husband were out at some restaurant and she got up to go to the bathroom. In the ladies’ room, this woman was in there who she thought was drop-dead gorgeous. This woman was coming onto her too, from what Donna told me. She was playing with Donna’s hair saying, “I love your hair.” She and her husband were drooling over her and staring at her. She said guys were hitting on her and she seemed uninterested and kept her eye on Donna. Donna said that she would’ve gotten together with that girl if it weren’t for her husband.

Now, why can’t this happen to me? I’m single. How come everyone can just go up and get who they want while I can’t? No matter how well I present myself, I’m a product of major rejection. With women, that is. I’m sure that just about any woman who hits on any guy will succeed. But for me, the lust is never mutual. It’s always one-sided. With everyone else, though, it seems it’s either mutual attraction or they just don’t care. I’d never ever want to look like a butch but it’d sure be easier. Women would be more attracted to me and guys would be less attracted to me. It’s gonna take me at least another year to find a one-nighter. But that’d be only if I put much more effort into it which I haven’t really cared to do now for almost two years. I lost the motivation and the energy to put the effort into it. You’d think it oughta be easier when you’re only looking for a one-nighter. People feel less threatened when they know you’re not out to put the strings on them, but it’s like it’s not meant to be for me.

No matter what, it still all comes down to me being so feminine. And unique, energetic, and with very little experience. Not ready, willing, able and confident. It’s so scary and awkward for me and I’m so sensitive due to being alone all the time. And not raised with closeness. As much as I’m a good actress, I can’t put up that much of a front. I can’t pretend I’m used to it.

I don’t like to talk about anything personal either. Donna doesn’t know anything other than I’m gay and I came here due to my asthma, my best friend, my music and cuz it’s cheaper to live here. She does also know about the project and that I was sick and hospitalized for two weeks but she doesn’t know all the details. Donna does seem like the type you can talk to and have her understand without her turning against you or throwing anything up in your face, but why bother?

Now I have some things to write about Donna that’s a real shocker. Her being a friend to me since I don’t know anyone here and making tanning less boring is great enough as it is. But then she and 3 others I met did an awesome thing for me. A girl named Angel and her husband Brian, along with Angel’s little sister Grace got together with Donna and they brought me tons of food! The church didn’t come when they said they would and Robert upstairs gave me a few things.

Donna was over here one day and I gave her a ring. She told me then that she had a sundress she didn’t fit into anymore.

I told her and Angel at the pool how I’d be near starving till the church came and that I had an application going for food stamps (Andy and I must go there tomorrow). So a knock on my door woke me up yesterday and it was Donna, Angel, Brian and Grace. The previous evening I was at Andy’s and she left a note on my door. She had come over twice and I got back close to 12:30 AM. I figured she’d still be up, but I didn’t go over to her place. She told me she was worried and remembered I said I had asthma. That shocked me cuz no one remembers anything you say. They all have minds like garbage disposals so I forgot how receptive Donna is. I told them I just woke up and she said, “Well, can we just drop this off?” I thought she meant the sundress till I looked down and saw them holding something like 7 bags of groceries. I was like, oh my God! They got tons of food! I’m not used to anyone other than my family going all out for me like that. My stomach was growling with hunger but that evening the church did come and bring food. The few days I went hungry here is still way worth it just to be here. I’d rather be here and go hungry every so often than be with my furniture and all the material things and food in the world and have to live in that project back east ever again.

Current Location: Arizona

SUNDAY, JUNE 28, 1992 Today my day was off to a raunchy start. I called that church for food assistance last Thursday. They were supposed to deliver food yesterday or today and they never did. I was pissed off and so hungry. I called them from upstairs at Robert’s and went off on them. Even though I slept late, I had to stay hanging around here since Thursday.

I have been at the pool every day tanning.

I’ve met Andy’s friend Velma and she’s very nice. She’s a hairdresser who thought my hair was beautiful. Eventually, I’ll need her to trim my ends.

Right when I first got here, I answered some personals. One where you leave a message for the ones that sound interesting and they call you back. I left about 10-15 messages and have only heard from 3. The others were probably turned off by my being feminine and so short. Two of them sounded as if they’d be nice but they were seeking someone for threesomes. One girl wasn’t into that, seemed nice and gave me her number. She gave me her beeper number and that was right as I was moving into my own place. I forgot where I wrote the number down and was supposed to call her on her beeper the Wednesday before last. Then she was gonna call me upon getting my message and come over. I found her number a few days later, called her beeper and punched in Andy’s number, but haven’t heard from her. My memory of our conversation is so vague as Velma was over talking to Andy. I can’t even remember her first name but I think she may have said something about going away for a while. A vacation of some sort, I guess, but I don’t know for how long.

Later, when I was at the pool swimming and tanning, Robert said he got a call about the church delivering food. He said they’d bring it to me tomorrow evening between 7:00 and 9:00, but I don’t buy nothing till I see it.

Nor do I believe I’ll ever have Pez or Donna’s bed.

Before I talk about another Donna I met who lives in Andy’s old 1-bedroom apartment, in Springfield the average apartment building was 4 stories. Here they’re usually 2 or 3 from what I’ve noticed. The studios go up to 2 floors. The 1- and 2-bedrooms go up to 3 floors.

The temperature was 108º today and 111º the other day. This is why you must constantly jump in the pool as you’re tanning.

Later…

Andy will be over soon but I’ll write till he gets here. First I’ll write about the beepers, then get on with other stuff. Andy told me all about this before I moved here. He even had it done to me. There are a few exchanges here that are mostly for beeper numbers. You take someone’s number (like Barb and Dave’s for example) and first you call a beeper # like 401 + 4 other digits. You’ll hear a beep then you dial the area code + # + pound key (#). Whoever owns the beeper should get this # displayed to them digitally and call them. So far, I’ve beeped in Fran, Jenny, Maliheh, Debbie and Barbara.

I may also write a “crazy” letter here and there to whomever. I’ve written to my family and Fran, Nervous, Debbie, Bob and Jai. I also sent a letter out to Chief B who I hear asks Kim about me. I’ll also write to Kim and Jessie.

SATURDAY, JUNE 27, 1992 When Andy first came here, he had a hard time starting off like most people usually do unless they’re rich. He called this church and they came out and gave him tons of food. We both applied for food stamps and we must go to their office this Tuesday. In the meantime, I have very little money. Robert upstairs was kind enough to give me a few things. Fortunately, they were things he didn’t like or want so he was just as glad to give them to me as I was to have them. He gave me some ramen noodles, tuna fish, oysters, clam chowder and coffee. Double Dutch Chocolate coffee which he said he tried and hated. It’s not as good as the Café Francais or the Café Vienna, but it’s OK. Andy’s fed me here and there too, but now I’ll be helping him to earn it from him. He owes $625 for getting the transmission on his car fixed, so tomorrow when the church comes with food I’ll give him stuff I don’t like or want. I’ll also owe Andy for long-distance phone calls, $150 for the electric deposit and for the ad. We placed an ad to sell my plane ticket back to Bradley as it was a round-trip special for $220. We managed to sell it for $87 and I also cleaned his place today. That’ll work off the rest of what I owe him which will be around $200.

Once a year, with verification, the electric company will help too, so we’ll see. Then, I’ll be all set as long as SS doesn’t fuck with me. If they do, Mom and Dad will step in.

Other than all that I should be OK financially but I won’t have hardly any extra spending money.

Later…

Shadow is lying here with me purring away. Andy was shocked at how big he got. So was Dad. Brenda was right, I guess, about Shadow after all.

The only bad thing here now is that there are tons of roaches, grasshoppers and tons of other bugs. Mark, next door, says he’s getting the same thing. The sewer roaches here can be a problem. They are so fucking huge, too. I mean, humongous. I will call the office tomorrow. Andy has no bugs. The only problem he had, in the beginning, was with ants and spiders, but they sprayed his place and that got rid of them. I’ve had shitloads of spiders, too. I am on the ground after all and this is Arizona. At least mosquitoes aren’t such a problem here as they are back east and in Florida.

When I call the office to have them come spray, I’ve got to hide Shadow in Andy’s place. Pets are only allowed on second floors and require a $220 pet deposit. That’s fucking crazy! It appears that someone from the office saw him out on my patio, so I’m keeping him inside now. They sent me a certified letter to get rid of him. That already tells me something about the people who work here. Why did they have to waste their time and money on a certified letter? Couldn’t they just tell me to my face directly?

Later…

On my first day here Andy took me to see Camelback Mountain and Squaw Peak Mountain. They’re awesome and so huge! It’s at a place called Paradise Valley that completely blows Longmeadow away. There are tons of gorgeous multi-million-dollar homes all through that mountain. Each home looks so different and so gorgeous. I love those Spanish-style roofs that are common here and stuccoed walls. Just about everyone has pools and several varieties of palm trees and cactuses. Those homes have such beautiful views of the mountains above them and downtown PHX below. One house was practically embedded into a huge boulder on the mountain. The rock pretty much hung over the house. On top of Squaw Peak, Andy took a picture of me with downtown PHX all behind me. You could look down and see forever. It was an awesome view. He took pictures of me here in and around my apartment, too.

He was able to show me a very tiny part of Stevie Nicks’s house. He showed me all of her parent’s house which we drove right up to. It’s small, shady, and has many types of trees with flowers.

Another neat thing around here is that there are lots of street names and places in Spanish. Now that I’m here, I can translate these things for Andy. Robert speaks Spanish and there are lots of Mexicans here, of course.

Tucson is 2 hours away and Mexico’s about 4 hours away. The Grand Canyon is 3 hours away. Someday, we’re gonna go there. That ought to be really nice and a breathtaking view, I’m sure.

The name of this apartment complex is Vista Ventana which means Window View in Spanish. Next to us is El Camino Dr. That means “the walk” or “the way.” There’s a building called El Caro which means The Expensive.

FRIDAY, JUNE 26, 1992 As I said before, my apartment is small but is worth it. There’s only one door. No back door. There’s a sliding glass door parallel to the front door. It has blue carpet. There’s just a living room, bedroom and kitchenette in here. The shower has sliding glass doors which is nice for a change. Shower curtains blow all around. There’s plenty of counter space and cabinets even though they don’t come close to the amount I had in S. Deerfield. I have a dishwasher, a garbage disposal, and a nice oven. Outside the glass door is an enclosed patio. With all the clothes, makeup, jewelry and knickknacks I have, I could use the extra closet space and some shelves. Having no furniture means I have to lay most of my stuff out on the floor.

Later…

Now I can begin from the night I first got here, now that I’ve described my apartment, the grounds and updated from the last day or so at Natchaug. I like to go in order of events. I basically updated from May 30th so I’m almost caught up.

Oh! I never wrote about Jeanne at Natchaug, did I? Well, she was super nice, anyway. The nicest one of all. She was very easy to talk to and she gave me some really awesome makeup that she used to sell.

Later…

That show I love, Reasonable Doubts, is on at 8:00. I sure do miss Marlee Matlin. Whether or not they’re repeats, who knows but I’m sure they are. I’m gonna be watching the show upstairs at my neighbor’s.

Later…

When I arrived I took notice of how much Andy looked the same. He’s gained a few pounds within the last year or so but he still looks 17 even though he’s 30.

He told me I looked great. Better than ever and even younger. I still know I look younger than 26 but I don’t think I look younger than I did a year and 3 months ago.

During the plane ride, I felt so shitty so when we ate I felt better for a while. He made an excellent roast with potatoes and corn. After dinner, he took me to the pool which is spectacular! I went into the Jacuzzi, too. All I kept thinking of is, oh my God, these pools and all this beauty are mine to live in year-round! Usually, people only go to such beautiful places for a vacation.

There’s some gorgeous scenery here too, besides where I live.

The bad catch to my first night in Phoenix was that I threw up twice. Being here and out of that project made it a little more bearable, but it was like, gee, welcome to Phoenix! It was no doubt due to being so exhausted, I mean I was only backed up in like 50 hours of sleep. After I threw up I was like, please God, I don’t need this now, I’m too tired and I couldn’t take being up all night throwing up 20 times. But I was able to get some sleep, thankfully.

He has the same plush carpet I do, only in brown and at first, I was gonna sleep on the floor but it was too hard. I slept in his bed with him but it wasn’t easy. He kicked or hit me a few times and left me 3” of space. I had to keep pushing him over. We’re both not used to sharing a bed and we hate it.

Earlier, before I got sick, he showed me pictures of two girls who also live here. They’ve been friends for years and one’s gay and one’s straight. Naturally, the straight one was pretty. However, when Andy said the gay one did not look it, I totally disagreed. She was no downright diesel butch, but you could tell. Typical butch dress code. Short hair and sporty shorts and a tank top at the pool. I liked her name, though, which is Stephanie. The pretty straight one’s name is Leslie but everyone calls her Pez. The first one I met was Stephanie. We met the following day while Andy was at work. When I went to the pool, I recognized her from one of the pictures. She was friendly and when I asked her if she’d ever known a gay woman as feminine as me, she said no. Was I surprised? Of course not!

Later…

Andy’s friend Donna promised me a twin-size mattress and box spring, but I think she’s jerking me around on that one because it never shows up. She’s either playing games, air-headed, busy, or all of the above. Andy said she said maybe this Saturday.

Some guy who lives here is giving Pez his waterbed. She claims that when he does she’ll give me her twin-size bed, but I don’t know. I’ll believe it when I see it cuz I think she may be full of shit, too. She is definitely a bit flaky, air-headed and undependable.

My neighbor upstairs has a truck and he offered to help transport any furniture. His name’s Robert and he’s from Santa Fe. He lives above me and he’s very nice.

I met my neighbor next to me named Mark and he’s OK, too. He claimed a package for me one day and lent me a foam mattress to sleep on. That was a lifesaver.

Andy’s on the 2nd floor and I’m on the 1st. He’s in Building 1 and I’m in Building 3. It’s a 60-second walk to each other’s doors. It’s also a 60-second walk to the pools for both of us. There are 2 pools and 2 Jacuzzis and 2 laundry rooms. Outside of each laundry room, there’s a soda machine and a payphone.

For the July 4th weekend, Robert’s going home for a visit to Santa Fe. I will feed his fish for him while he’s gone. We’ve had some good chats and he’s helped me get started here in several ways just like Andy has. He gave me nails to put up wall decorations and let me use his phone. He showed me some poems he’s written and insisted on reading my songs and seeing my drawings. Even to hear me sing which is nice. People don’t usually ask to hear me sing. I have a few more things to write about Robert, but first I’ve got to have a bite to eat.

THURSDAY, JUNE 25, 1992 I still have much to write about but I’ll start from where I left off. I was laughing to myself earlier as I remembered something Dad said to me in Natchaug. He told me to write a book about my life. I do write well and we all know that. If I wrote a book on my life it’d be so long. Also, it’d piss several people off as they wouldn’t be happy campers due to my bluntness. However, I would be honest about my opinions on certain people, like it or not.

As I said before, I really appreciate Tammy and Dad’s help, but the 4 days I was there at Tammy’s were no fun with all the commotion, and Tammy’s kittens woke me up at night. Dad drove me nuts and got on my nerves about my clothes. In a recent letter, I told them to keep their mouths shut for once and for all and wear what they want to wear and keep their opinions to themselves. I don’t tell them or anyone else what to wear or what not to wear, and would like the same respect in return.

I never liked Bill, who has been brainwashed by the family into believing all sorts of shit pertaining to myself. Either way, I never liked him and felt he was always the complete opposite of me. But if he makes Tammy happy, great. I always wondered how Bill can handle his job. Not cuz he’s unintelligent, but cuz he’s so spacey. I always figured one should be as alert as possible when working with machinery.

My last day there at Tam’s was pretty shitty. Cuz I’m a night person and was so psyched, I fell asleep super late. Close to 3 AM. Fucking Shadow, who I got out of the old place that previous day, woke me up at 5 AM. I was pissed and I never felt shittier in all my life. I was wheezing my ass off, too. It was early Monday morning on the 8th when Dad and I brought Shadow over to Tam’s.

At 3 PM that same day, UPS came to take all my boxes out of the project. I wasn’t there for that. Dad was.

At 8 AM on Tuesday, Dad and I took off for Greenfield where I saw Sheila. I had to fill out the transfer papers for my probation.

Then, we went into Deerfield where I closed out my checking account. I went across the street to the habitat building and saw Dave and Karen. I used their phone to call upstairs to Kim and Mark but their machine came on. I left a message saying I was moving to Phoenix.

When I got here I spoke to Bob who got the message I left him.

When I called Nervous and told him to guess where I was, his first guess was Florida.

Anyway, after Greenfield and Deerfield, we went to Longmeadow to see Boo and Max as I said earlier. Her place looked so much more modern the last time I saw it and that was years ago. The 100 bucks they gave me helped a lot.

At the airport, Dad and I got donuts and coffee. I was dead tired and feeling pretty shitty. In fact, at Boo’s I laid down on her bed and slept an hour and a half. I went out cold but it felt as if I had only slept for two seconds. That day my asthma was horrible and my chest was so tight and short of breath. Naturally, Dad was lecturing me about smoking.

I did manage to sing a few songs on his van’s tape player but just barely. Shadow never shut up the whole way down. We bought him a cat travel box which he was locked into. When he moved to Deerfield and to Norwich, he was fine. I guess the reason he never shut up was cuz he hadn’t seen much of me for two weeks.

What a feeling it was, though, as Dad and I walked down through the gate to board that plane. As shitty as I felt physically walking onto that plane, how I was feeling mentally was a whole different ballgame. I was flying before I was flying. Tears of joy were streaming down my face as well as the goodbye/I’ll-miss-you tears. I’ll miss Dad, Tammy and my nieces. I won’t miss living near Tammy and the girls, though. Tammy and I never really had much in common and although I love my nieces, kids are a royal pain in the ass to deal with, regardless of whose kids they are.

I told Dad I felt like he was setting me free. He said, “I know.”

The stewardess said Dad could board with me. She probably thought I was scared shitless and had never flown before. She no doubt thought I was much younger than I am. I mean, I’m 26, but most people think I’m 17.

Andy will be at our beach from August 1st - 8th. Tammy and the girls were gonna go see him there but that’s when they’ll all be in Florida. At first, I thought it to be cool that they could meet up at the beach. Now I’m not so sure that would have been such a great idea. It’s better that they don’t meet. Andy knows better as far as what to say and what not to say but Tammy can be persistent and nosy. If she were to insist on something Andy didn’t agree with she’ll freak out and I’ll never hear the end of it. I also don’t need Tammy saying negative and untrue or blown out of proportion shit to Andy even though he pretty much knows what to believe, or Andy to tell Tammy something and have her blow it out of proportion. On the other hand, Tammy has been known to do that all her life and I know what’s true even though Mom and Dad would believe her over me.

In about a year or so I will see my family. I guess Mom and Dad will come out here. Maybe Tammy and the girls too. I’d much rather they all come here than for me to go there. Dad mentioned Tammy and I both going to Florida and meeting up there. Oh no! I cannot take the two of them together. And with Mom and Dad preferring her over me, that tends to get them together to gang up on me in some ways. I’ll have more people getting on my case at once. If they mention or start shit about my clothes, though, I’m gone.

Next time I see my nieces, they’ll all be so much bigger. Next time I see Tammy, her hair will be longer, I guess. That’ll be different. Of course, I’ll be sitting on mine without putting my head back. For now, cuz it’s so curly, I must pull it out straight, throw my head back, then I can sit on it. When I pull it straight it’s ½” from the crack of my ass. I was hoping the lack of humidity here would straighten my hair but it hasn’t. I still look like I stuck my finger in an electric socket and got zapped.

OK, now I’ll begin with the 10 million things I’ve got to say so far about Phoenix. First of all, it is so very very beautiful and I will never ever return to New England. Everything’s so modern and cheap here. Not just the rentals, but other stuff too, like food. A gorgeous, modern house here with a pool and central AC which is standard would sell for around $40,000-$50,000. In New England, the same type of house would be around $120,000.

The city is spread out and not so condensed and congested like Springfield is. In Springfield there’s one tall building after another, practically piled on top of each other. Here, the buildings are shorter and farther apart. The houses here are closer, though. Too close. You can open a window on the side of a house and reach out and practically touch the house next to you.

There is a huge variety of cactuses and palm trees which are absolutely beautiful. They’re so beautiful that they almost look fake.

I just thought of two things that are so funny. I must write this before I continue on cuz I don’t want to forget this. My sister used to always tell me she envied me and I’d burst out laughing. After I arrived here she called me. I told her that if she were to tell me she envied me at this point, I could finally understand that. She’d die if she saw what beauty I live in. It makes you feel very rich even though I’m very poor.

The other thing is Ann Marie. Eventually, she’s gonna try calling me only to get a recording saying that number has been disconnected. She’s not worth paying to make a phone call to, or having her pay by me calling collect, or being regular letter writers with. On the other hand, perhaps somewhere down the line, she can receive a crazy, bizarre letter that makes absolutely no sense. I wonder if I ever mentioned Phoenix to her. That Andy lives here, I mean, cuz I’m sure I mentioned Andy. Well, it doesn’t matter but I’m going to go to bed now.

I don’t want to sleep too late tomorrow cuz I have important phone calls to make. I also must continue working on my tan. So far, so good but I still do have a long way to go. The color I’ve gotten so far looks good.

A note from Andy dated 6/11/1992:

Now don’t worry, I didn’t read any of these pages. I just opened up to the first plank page to say welcome to Phoenix. It’s about time you got here. The fem missed you!

Later…

Well, I officially got this apartment on the 10th, but I had to wait till the 15th. My parents are the co-signers as I have no credit. The office had a hard time getting ahold of them at first. We gave them the office’s fax number so they could fax the information along. That same day I got 29 boxes from UPS. It was no fun unpacking this time for 2 reasons. First of all, I have no furniture to put stuff in. No shelves and no dressers for my clothes. Not much closet space either. This is a small 1-bedroom studio. It’s no larger than my dive in Norwich, but that’s OK cuz this is far from a dive. It’s so modern and beautiful. Inside and all around the grounds outside. I don’t feel cooped up, cramped and trapped as I did before even in the other places. Here, there’s life outdoors. I have the pools and at night I usually go to the Jacuzzi. There are no saunas here as my Dad apparently thought. If there were saunas here, I would never use them. I’d die in those things. Literally suffocate.

The grounds here are so beautiful.

Now that I live here a little while, and feel and look so much better since beginning to really get a tan, I feel a little more confident. A little more as far as my desire for more one-nighters. I don’t have to invite them over to my dump anymore, even though I was always neat and great at decorating.

I feel a little more determined and motivated to pursue my singing and music, despite my fears and doubts. That’s one of my purposes here. I know I’ve been sent here for that as well as the other 3 reasons. I’m here for 4 reasons. 1. My best friend. 2. My asthma. 3. Cuz it’s cheaper to live here. 4. My music. There was nothing for me in Crackfield, Deadfield or Poorwich.

Everyone knows that I believe there’s a reason for everything even if it’s a bad thing. Like with the project being so bad. It was part of the plan. That’s what it took to get me out here. My premonitions are usually about 80% accurate. If I’m off I’m not off by far. I’m still close enough if not right on. I always believed and felt that sometime in 1994 something serious would happen with my music. Well, 1994, isn’t many years away. I always knew it was pretty hopeless where I used to live as far as any major breaks or connections. Especially without Andy and perhaps his friend Donna who just opened up for Paula Abdul’s concert last night. They chose 10 demos out of 500 and Donna was one of those 10. At the mall, the last 10 performed and Donna won. I saw all this on video. She won a record contract, $1000 and 1000 hours of free recording time at Vintage Recorders studios. That’s excellent exposure for her. Still, even when becoming a singer felt hopeless out in the boonies in Deerfield and through hell in Norwich, I always felt I was fated for fame no matter what. I don’t know how, when or why, but me moving here now must be saying something. So many weird coincidences and things just conveniently falling into place. For example, apartments here are plentiful. You can get a 1- or 2-bedroom apartment or a house practically in a day. Studios, on the other hand, are harder to get so quickly cuz they’re much more in demand. In MA the total of SS and SSI checks is $581. In CT and AZ they’re $442. So, even though the 1-bedrooms are $309, I can only afford a studio now. It just so conveniently happened that one was available that some girl was gonna take, but decided to remain where she was. The 2-bedrooms which are 900 square feet cost $414. In New England, a place so modern would be $1000-$1,200. In New York City and Boston, maybe it’d go for $1,500.

TUESDAY, JUNE 23, 1992 Oh, my God, I’ve already been here 14 days! It feels like it’s only been a week. I guess I can say I am disappointed in myself for not writing daily. I must keep up on it and find time to write daily. Now I’m bound to forget little things here and there that’ll add up to quite a bit. There’s so much to say and I have been keeping notes of stuff I’ll want to write about so I don’t forget them. However, in the days to follow, I’m sure I’ll remember bits and pieces of things to write about. I only wish I had a table to do my writing at.

Backing up to my last few days at Natchaug, now. I was there from May 24th to June 5th and I flew here on June 9th.

I moved into my own 1-bedroom studio last Monday, the 15th.

As I was at the tail end of the previous journal I mentioned a fight between Lindsay and I. It turned out to be so funny and we were always joking about it afterward. Lindsay was like me when she’d go off. Not off on herself or others, but verbally, I mean. She did that 2 or 3 times and it never upset me as I’m the same way and that’s my method of getting it out. It avoids doing other really dumb stuff you’ll really regret. Most people can’t deal with that, but I could fully understand where she was coming from.

I had gone off one morning on a staff member high on power-play which I already wrote about in my last journal. Lindsay was sitting on her bed when I came in yelling about that staff member and Lindsay threatened me if I continued to bitch. Well, that did it and I jumped up and yelled, “Come on! Maybe that’s exactly what I need!”

She goes, “No. I’m not gonna go to prison for putting little people through the wall.”

I said, “You won’t go to prison. You’ll go to the hospital cuz I’ll fucking slaughter you.”

Then at that point, she said, “Oh, just let it out. This is stupid.”

I said, “Yeah, it is stupid cuz I always liked you.” She said she liked me too, then we burst out laughing. She was kind enough, though, to move into Bertie’s room when Bertie’s roommate moved out. That gave me a little more space.

When Dad came to see me he constantly was asking questions about Andy and Arizona. I knew at that point that I was finally winning Mom and Dad over as people don’t usually ask so many questions unless they’re very seriously considering something. At least my parents don’t. After we discussed how expensive New England is, my asthma and allergies, that horrible project, me missing my best friend and there being nothing for me there, it was time. I knew I had finally won. Dad said he might call Andy but I speeded things up by calling Andy who called Dad at my place. Andy called Mom at Dad’s request too. It is cool knowing Andy’s already been here for 15 months. That way he knows his way around and what it’s like here. I can understand Mom and Dad feeling more comfortable with that, rather than us both coming here together for our first time. Andy has visited here before. He’s also been to California. I’ve never been past Texas.

Dad packed up everything I own. All but the furniture was shipped to me by UPS. I don’t miss my old ugly furniture. When you’re as miserable as I was, material things no longer matter. No, not in a place like that. My waterbed got to be a royal pain in the ass.

The NHA sent me a check for $100. Wow. With all I went through there physically and mentally, they oughta have paid me much much more. I never ever saw Barbara or the rest of her family again. I noticed that the 4 times or so I was at that dump, they weren’t home. Coincidence? Nope. Dad and Tammy were afraid I’d jump all over her. Well, I’m not out of their lives completely. I’ve got letters for Barbara, Debbie, and I wish I could send crazy letters to Maria, but I don’t know her last name. Oh well, Maria and the rest of Oakwood Knoll will surely hear all about the letters from Barbara and Deb. I’ll always have mixed emotions about the few people I knew back in those damn projects. On one hand, they’re very nice. On the other hand, they’re stupidly and dangerously gutsy. They talk too much and there’s a price to be paid for that. A very annoying price such as very strange letters. The beepers are taking care of them which I’ll explain later.

All my furniture was taken to Tammy’s house. It was sold off in a tag sale. I really appreciated Tammy and Dad for helping me and being there when I really needed them. At times it was hard to show it especially early in the morning. And it was a zoo there with all the adults, kids and animals. We all know I’m far from used to that. Tammy cried over the phone while I was still in Natchaug as I am the last family member to go. The last one really associated with her. Lisa was very upset. Becky and Sarah are still too young to get what was going on. We promised to write to each other and I’ve already sent a few letters to Lisa, Tammy and my parents. I’ve received a card from Mom and letters from Lisa and Dad.

I’ve spoken with Bob, Fran and Nervous. When I get a phone which may not be for a few weeks, I’ll call or write to Jessie. I’m sure Jessie will accept a collect call from me. According to Andy, though, you can’t make collect calls or use a long-distance carrier access code. It’s $5 a month to block your line. This is what they do here for a year if you’re a new customer unless you can pay the $170 deposit. The deposits here are bad, but once you get beyond that it’s worth it as everything is so much cheaper here. There’s a $46 installation charge here but you can get it waived if you’re low income, over 65 or have a medical condition. The phone company sent me a form I’m sending to my asthma doctor in Norwich. He’ll send it back to me to give to them. I hope it won’t take too long till I get a phone.

Andy lent me the $150 electric deposit. That was nice. He makes excellent money at Denny’s.

I still have a million other things to write about but I am beat.

I am still not quite ready to go to sleep. I told Andy to knock on my window and wake me up at noon. If I fall asleep by 4:00, I’ll have gotten 8 hours of sleep.

THURSDAY, JUNE 11, 1992 The Vista Ventana in Phoenix, Arizona…

I am here now and it is absolutely beautiful! I still have a zillion things to say but I want to do something first to help me fall asleep. I’m just too tired to write now.

TUESDAY, JUNE 9, 1992 On the Way to Arizona from Connecticut…

I’m actually on the plane now! I have a 50-minute layover in Cincinnati, then I’ll continue on from there.

I have so much to write about, it’s amazing. I’ll start from when I left off while I was still in Natchaug Hospital. There are so many little things to write about besides the important and very serious stuff.

Later…

I stopped writing momentarily as the stewardesses went by serving coffee, soda, and peanuts.

We should arrive in Cincinnati in about an hour.

There’s not much more to write about concerning Natchaug but I can never express enough how grateful I am to Dad and Tammy for all their help. I am free now. My project days are over. I will never ever live in one again and I should’ve made this move two years ago. It’s cool, though, knowing Andy’s been there for a little over a year and is all settled and knows what’s around.

Before going to the airport today, Dad brought me to Greenfield to see Sheila. There, I filled out the proper paperwork to move to Arizona.

I also saw Dave and Sharon who work in the habitat building. I went into the office to call upstairs. Kim wasn’t home (naturally) and Mark was no doubt asleep.

Then, at 11:30 or so, dad and I ate lunch at McDonald’s in Northampton.

After, we stopped at Cousin Boo’s and Max’s where I really didn’t want to go. I’m glad I did, though, as they were both super nice. They also gave me a good luck card with $100! Cool, huh? Any bit will help and Tammy’s gonna send me a refund from the Norwich housing authority. Also, money from my furniture sales.

At Boo’s I slept upstairs on her bed for an hour and a half. I’m whipped and I needed it. I only slept 4 hours last night.

Later…

I have no idea what time it is now. All I know is that we went back two hours. Of course, when I’m in Arizona I’ll have gone back 3 hours. When I arrive it’ll be 10:30 ET, but it’ll be 7:30 PT. Another two hours to go, I guess.

I feel better now that I ate dinner. Before I felt as if I’d gone through a meat grinder. I’m functioning on only a few hours of sleep.

The last flight we were 31,000 feet high. On this flight we’re definitely higher cuz I can’t see hardly anything. On the last flight, you could just barely make out the cars. They look like little toy cars, of course. Earlier it was very sunny, but now all I see are clouds all around me.

I hope the airport in Phoenix isn’t too far from Andy’s place. I also hope it doesn’t take forever to get Shadow and my suitcases. Poor Shadow. He no doubt is pissed and terrified. Especially with take-off and landing. It’s getting bumpy, so next time I write will be in PHX on steady ground!

MONDAY, JUNE 8, 1992 I have a million and one things to write about, but I'm gonna wait and save it for the plane. I will have a long flight, too. I can't wait to fly but the one bummer is, no smoking. Only on international flights going out of the country. As of now, I have 33 hours to go.

MONDAY, JUNE 1, 1992 My life has completely changed in a day. I mean, my whole life, and I'm still quite shocked. Just 2 days ago I was worried about finding another dive in Norwich, but guess what? I'm moving to Phoenix!!!! I can't believe it! I'm so psyched! I'm actually gonna be in Arizona with Andy in 8 days!!!!!!!

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thepieisalie · 4 months ago

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My time has come :)

Some Azula-centric headcanons that I also use in my ATLA fanfiction:

- Azula’s favorite food is mochi and she actually has a really big sweet tooth. We see her eating some in a flashback in the comic: “Smoke and Shadow.” And therefor it is now officially her favorite, you can’t argue this with me.

- Azula is surprisingly good with children. It doesn’t look like it at first, but there is just something about her that makes little kids gravitate towards her. (I mean, 10 year me also thought she was super cool. You can’t tell me some firebending kids wouldn’t look up to her and her blue fire)

- Azula doesn’t like animals. She doesn’t care for them whatsoever and gets annoyed whenever they, much like the children, gravitate towards her for some reason. She’s the type of person who is the only one in the room to dislike cats, and then have the cat crawl onto her lap specifically.

- Fire healing is a thing, as we learn in The Legend of Korra. But I headcanon that it’s a lost art within the current culture of the Fire Nation. And I think it would be neat for Azula to learn this skill, together with her realizing that firebending doesn’t have to revolve around distruction. And it’s gonna be funny to see other people’s reactions when they learn Azula knows how to heal now. (I know it’s a cliche for a redemption arc, but idc. It’s fun)

- Azula developed a fear of drowning after Katara defeated her. She’s not afraid of water or anything, but she starts to feel panicked whenever she’s fully submerged.

- Azula is actually very spiritual. She just doesn’t discover this about herself until much later, because spiritually was never taken seriously or encouraged by her father. But once she gets better at it, it enhances her abilities in multiple ways.

- Azula learned to talk from a relatively young age. She was already capable of forming full sentences (ofc using simple words, but still) by the time she was two and a half.

- She also discovered her firebending quicker than most children. Usually it’s discovered around the age of five or six, but Azula sparked her first flame when she was three years old. (Idk if this is accurate to canon tbh)

- Azula has really neat handwriting, but she’s not good at drawing.

- Hair is canonically a very important symbol in Fire Nation culture. Letting someone touch your hair is a big deal there. As children, Azula sometimes let Ty Lee play with and braid her hair.

- I know that in canon, Azula figures out how to use lightning redirection (this happens in the comics.) I do something different in my fanfic though. Azula won’t learn lightning redirection, but she invents a new technique herself. She basically learns that it’s possible to maintain a constant charge of lightning if you let it circuit through the body. This means that she will only have to do her wind up once and is then able to bend lightning continuously for some time after. (This was my idea to keep the requirement of her needing a charge up time to generate lightning (unlike her father who can do it almost instantly) but to also buff her lightning bending skills.) This technique is incredibly dangerous and difficult to pull off though, since it requires the lightning to pass through the heart. You must maintain a steady heartbeat and control at all times, or risk it doing fatal damage. So to counterbalance its overpoweredness, it’s got that downside. (I know Iroh says in the show not to let lightning pass through the heart. But he also said you cannot bend lightning while you’re emotionally unstable. And Azula was anything but emotionally stable during the Agni Kai, and she could still bend lightning. I’m not saying Uncle Iroh is wrong, but that his logical applies mainly to lightning bending in general. Azula is just built different and finds a way to do it anyway)

- I headcanon that Azula as a closeted lesbian. This doesn’t really play a part in my fanfiction, since she’s not shipped with anyone in it and there’s no real romance. But I do hint at it every now and then, just for funsies.

- Hence, Azula sucks at flirting with all genders.

- (This is more an Ursa headcanon than Azula, but whatvs) Ursa used to check up on her children every night when they went to bed. This is a habit she built up because she’s constantly worried about their safety. Azula noticed this at some point, but mistook it for her mother trying to make sure she was adhering to her bed time. So she made it a habit of forcing herself to stay awake until Ursa passed by, because she doesn’t like the idea of being check up on during her sleep.

- Azula likes knives, and she probably would’ve gotten a collection if she could. It’s an interest she bonded over with Mai, and why she was so upset when Uncle Iroh gifted Zuko a dagger and not her. This interest kinda faded over time though as she got older.

- Azula once dug through her mother’s makeup try to it on (like little kids do.) But Ursa caught her and scolded her for it, claiming she was too young to be wearing makeup. So when Ursa disappeared, Azula started wearing it as an act of defiance. And Ozai let her because he seriously couldn’t care less about that sort of thing. (That’s my reasoning as to why she wears makeup in the show.)

Can we share fun Azula headcanons?

The only "requirement" is a basis in Azula's canon portrayal. So...

Azula plotting the percect romantic dinner for Zuko and Mai after Zuko returns to the Fire Nation? Perfect. No notes.

Azula contorted into being a firebending Harley Quinn? No! Bad fan! No biscuit!

#I can probably think of more #but it’s late so imma leave it as this for now #I try to base these on canon but some are probably just for my silly lil brain #princess azula #atla azula #azula #headcanon #atla headcanons #i am so normal about azula

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jolliestlolli · 2 years ago

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Jolly's Friday Blog Update - Dec 9th 2022

Nearly forgot about this shit lmao.

What a week. I could really go for some MJ right about now but it's looking like I probably won't be having a green Christmas if you know what I mean.

So let's get down to brass tacks: Writing. I haven't done a lot of it this week, there I admitted it. To say I didn't write at all would be inaccurate, but the most I did was some extremely self-indulgent crap that is not meant for virgin eyes to read. Other than that all I really did was make some minor edits to stuff I've written with a very close friend of mine, and even then I know I could have probably done more. Oh well, there's always the weekend.

I had my first ever CT scan this week. Lately my health has sort of been on the decline, and we're hoping to get some answers soon. The truth is I haven't really been well for a long time now, I've been dealing with varying degrees of stomach trouble since I was at least 10 or 11. You might remember in my Author's Notes on my latest Ao3 story The Greatest, I mentioned how I recently got very very sick and was still not 100% recovered at the time that story got uploaded. I'd say I'm doing a lot better but the reality is I'm still dealing with the same issues I've been dealing with for close to a decade now, I've just gotten to a point where I'm like "This is a normal level of pain for me, therefor I'm perfectly fine". IDK what they'll find on the CT Scan, if they'll find anything at all. I almost hope they do just so I can finally get some damn answers. Whatever happens, I'll say this: I'll be happy if I never have to chug an entire bottle of Barium Sulfate again for the rest of my life.

As far as self-care is concerned, I at least have a decent morning routine in place: Wake up, shower, cook myself breakfast, take a walk around the neighborhood to try to wake myself up. Sure, there's room for improvement; I need to start remembering to brush my teeth everyday before they rot right out of my mouth. Oh also! Last night my mom found this old journal I was using back in 2020 to keep track of everything I ate and drank that day, and what my stomach pain was like. I can't entirely remember why I stopped. I feel like it had something to do with the fact that on some days, I couldn't remember what I ate, or if I even ate anything at all. Or maybe I eventually just couldn't be bothered anymore. Who knows. Bottom line, I'm gonna try to get back into the habit of writing in that journal.

Anyways, on another topic: My best friend and I finally started watching the 3rd and final season of Dead To Me last night, which I have been waiting for for a stupidly long time. If you don't know what Dead To Me is, stop whatever you're currently doing, go on Netflix, and watch it right fucking now. You will not regret it. The fact that it hasn't gotten nearly the level of international recognition that certain other Netflix shows have gotten is a crime and an injustice and I will do everything in my power to rectify this mistake. The basic plot is: Jen Harding is a mother of two that was recently widowed after her husband died in a hit and run. At a grief support group, she ends up meeting Judy Hale, and the two of them form a close bond. But Judy has some skeletons in her closet, and she's not even the only one.

My shitty summary probably doesn't even do the show justice, it's just that good. I can't even go into any real detail without giving away a small fraction of the many twists and turns the story takes. You have to see it to know what I'm talking about. We're about 3 episodes in and I'm just super nervous to see how the whole thing concludes, and I have slight PTSD from the last time I got super hyped over a new season of a show I love to pieces only to be horrifically betrayed... (*cough* *cough* The Promised Neverland *cough* *cough* *cough*)

Anyway that's all I can really think to talk about for now, see y'all on Monday. I'll go ahead and leave you with this screenshot of a funny exchange I had with my best friend last night:

#Jolly's Bi-weekly Blog Update #chronic illness #self care #dead to me #netflix

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keymintt · 5 years ago

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so i found out a week ago that my parents were thinking of moving out of the house my brother and i grew up in, found out yesterday that were moving into a new house in february, and found out an hour ago that they're only going to be in the house for two more weeks meanwhile im 20 miles away in my apartment at school and im,,,,, Big Sad

#im heading home tonight and it's probably gonna be my last time in the house??? the fuck???#also my new rooms not gonna have a closet i do find that funny #like i already came out cant go back into the closet lmao #its been awhile since ive used my talking tag oop #real mood is crying in the car but my brother cant see bc i got my sunglasses on lolololol #dont feel like you gotta respond or anything i just need a place to talk #no i won't shut up

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intergalacticaquarium · 2 years ago

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more terrible no good headcanons for eddie disaster dreamboat munson

I said that if anybody made him too cool I'd have to add more and that's exactly what I'm gonna do babes because I had to scroll for way to long to find him making spagetti-os

(posting again bc it wasn't showing in the tag)

(first post)

-genuinely doesn't know what those stains are. Didn't even know it was stained bc he's had the same fitted sheet on it with one corner tugged off for 8 months and forgot about them since last time

-throws away Tupperware if the stuff in it is too gross

-he's pretty sure that green sour candy counts as a vegetable so he does eat at least 3 a day.

-just. Doesn't ever throw things away. Stupid shit like the backs of band aids and paper straw wrappers and napkins and hooooo boy this has turned into a callout post about myself

-sometimes horseflies fly into his hair and get stuck and he can hear them buzzing around and doesn't necessarily so anything about it right away until it stops

-no room for legs in the front seat of his car that space is reserved for old fast food bags

-buys new underwear instead of doing laundry

-hey why do I keep writing genuinely embarrassing things that I literally do irl. Is this really worth putting myself and the 4 huge bags of laundry I have in my tiny car and all my band aid wrappers on blast. Next I'm gonna write that every surface in eddies house is covered in stacks of hobbies and papers that feel like a goddamn archeological dig every time I clean

-psych he does that too

- ok things that I don't also do so that I don't start having a crisis that makes me a tidier person:

-feeds a family of raccoons that live in an abandoned hunting cabin in the woods

-one time he let one live in his closet for a bit and hoped Wayne wouldn't notice (this may explain some of the stains)

-this boy spills. Everything. He's a hand talker and it doesn't matter if he's holding something.

-the hand talking is also terrifying when in a car he is driving

-never drinks water ever and it stresses ppl out

-every single time he sees somebody he knows in public he will try and sneak up on them to scare them

-wears shoes inside bc he broke glass on the carpet months ago and he doesn't want to vacuum.

-the only place he has to actually sit and do anything I his room is his bed because everything else is covered in stuff

-everything is covered in stuff but every drawer he has is empty

-theres one category of things he owns that is organized absolutely meticulously and idk what it is but he's very proud of it and when he says he's "cleaning his room" it means organizing like band tees alphabetically or sorting minifig painting supplies and everything else stays trashed

-it's a perm and he did it himself in his bathroom 100%

-hair dye stains all over the bathroom from an ill advised look a while back. and maybe a few more times

-doesnt have a compulsive habit to bite his nails he does it bc he can never find the damn fingernail clippers

-notes and doodles. All over his arms

- yknow how when u were in school by the last day you'd have like one pencil and nothing else and u kept a hold of it bc you couldn't find any others?

- eddies been at that point since about half way thru his first senior year. He has one pencil and it is a stub (it is a d.a.r.e. pencil and he does find it funny) with no eraser and it's not sharp and it had a million bite marks on it

-has little stoner burn holes in all his clothes all his sheets his matress his sheets and the seats on his car bc he needs to be more careful and is gonna end up starting a fire someday

-wait that last one was a me thing

-maybe this is how I can embrace my flaws. make eddie do em too. it's cute when he's disgusting

-I no longer have improve myself at all

-puts random food in his pockets for later even though it will get linty. Gonna go ahead and say that I don't do this.

-isn't actually that good at guitar it turns out

-I gotta stop myself now because I know they'll just keep comin but add any you can think of or dm me because every time he gets worse he gets more of my love so like 2 give him a hug reblog 2 spray him with a hose

#eddie munson x reader #stranger things #stranger things x reader #stranger things fanfiction #stranger things fic #my writing #eddie munson #eddie munson x oc #eddie munson fanfiction #eddie tag

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moemoemammon · 3 years ago

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I just found ur blog and read thru some of ur stuff and im in love !! Ur writing is nice to read, and always gives a nice picture of the situation

If its aight, could u do some headcannons for the demon bros Finding out mc goes real hard on housekeeping ? Im talking fast and good cleaning, does chores without problems, propably even cleans after them (totally doesnt mother them in anyway), all without complaint, mc just cares

Housekeeper MC!

(Feat. GN!MC and the Demon Bros)

✦ ✦ ✦ ✦ ✦ ✦ ✦ ✦ ✦ ✦ ✦ ✦ ✦ ✦ ✦

Lucifer

The fact that he didn't have to shove a mop and bucket into your hands like the evil stepmother has him like 👀👀

Out of every person he's met, you and Barb are the only ones that actually enjoy cleaning? And now he's wondering if you've been influenced by him in some way because got damn are those floors sparkling-

Ever since you've arrived, the house has been immaculate. But as much as he enjoys that, he worries that you aren't leaving enough chores for his brothers to do.

They're gonna be lazy at this rate, especially if you keep cleaning up after them like that. He's planning to sit you down and have a good talk about how you should rest a bit, and- D...did you polish his desk????

"MC... as grateful as I am to you, I thought I asked you to rest? You don't have to clean every little thing in this house. You're here as our guest, and more, so I won't have you behaving like a maid. But if you're that interested in keeping your hands busy, you may feel free to maintain my desktop. It looks as good as new, thanks to you."

Mammon

Oh, so you're one of THOSE types, huh? The goody goodies that like to make everything clean and sparkly, huh?? Well don't expect him to help ya!

Was an asshole at first. Made messes to see if you'd clean them, tried to dump his chores on you, etc. But now that you've stolen his heart? Yeah, he wants you to sit down.

You're messing up your hands with all that time spent scrubbing crevices and dusting ugly old paintings, when you could be spending time with him!

Tch, that's it! If it's chores that're keeping you from looking his way, he'll just finish them before you can do anything! Checkmate!

"You're always scrubbin' somethin'! Let my brothers take care of the messes, while YOU sit down and watch this movie with me! Ain't no point in watchin' it by myself, so I ain't takin' no for an answer!" "Huh?? Waddya mean 'when was the last time I vacuumed'??"

Levi

Oi oi oi...! What do you think you're doing with that feather duster?! You don't think you've got the right to approach his figures with it, do you?! WRONG!

But you quickly discover how ticklish Levi is, and he squirms out of your way while watching in horror as you... delicately handle every figure? And dust them from top to bottom, without so much as an accessory out of place..?

Wait... are you seriously okay with picking up all that trash?? S-some of it's sticky from all the junk food, and- Gah! Don't go messing around in his closet!!!

Yeahhh Levi doesn't let you clean his room lmao. It's way too stimulating to watch you carefully touch every surface in his room... I-it's like you're heaven everything with your presence, and...

"S-so yeah! The only things you're allowed to clean are the figures and the outside of Henry's tank! Nothing else, got it?! Anything more and I seriously won't be able to handle it...I won't even be able to sit still in my own room......." 👉👈

Satan

Satan found it funny how willing you were to take up every little chore there was to be done in the house and he's got to admit, reading is much more enjoyable in a tidy environment.

But what he REALLY wants to know is how you managed to dust off every single book in the house, his room included, without him?? Knowing?? And you've done every shelf as well, cleaned out the cobwebs behind it, and even repaired that little tear in the upholstery of his favorite arm chair????

Has also deduced that you're probably the maid character in the books that knows everything. Actually, you're a lot like Barbatos. What secrets are you hiding human 🔫

Just kidding. But yeah, when you insist on dusting his room, he follows you around the room and watches you. You know, just in case you fall or something falls on you! No other reason.

"As much as I like having you here all to myself, it makes me feel bad watching you do that by yourself. Why don't you we clean together? We'll get it done twice as fast, and when we're finished, I'd like to read a book to you. You remind me of a certain character from a murder mystery novel I've started."

Asmo

Eeehhh?!?!? You've seriously managed to organize both his endless skin care product collection, and his ENTIRE wardrobe?!? You're amazing...!

And you don't stop there. You were more than happy to clean his tub for him and everything, and you know how hard it is to get oil off the side of a tub, right? You're a lifesaver!

Asmo casually pawns off his chores too you. Oh, he just did his nails! Can you do the dishes? Ah, he just bought this outfit. Can you take out the trash? He's about to go out with his friends to a party, so be a dear and take care of the common bathroom for him?

Lucifer scolds the shit out of him every time he catches him doing that. You're welcome. But don't think Asmo won't repay you! He'll give you so much love, you'll be drowning in it! Figuratively or literally, depending on your preferences-

"Fufufu... if you wanted my attention, you should've just told me! You didn't have to go tidying up my shoe collection, but I'm happy you did~! If you keep spoiling me like this, I might not be able to keep my hands off of you! Unless... that's what you wanted?"

Beel

Things tend to get pretty messy with Beel around, with the trail of crumbs he always leaves in his wake, and how he manages to get every surface he touches sticky. But you must be a miracle worker...

You're like a living roomba, and his ravenous appetite is no match against your cleaning skills! You seem to predict when the food bits will fall, and it's thanks to you that he can eat without a care in the world!

It's actually kind of scary, though. He'll drop a bite of his sandwich and move down to retrieve it to eat, and... it's gone. Poof. Into the ether of the garbage can...

You can still rest once in a while though, you know? Beel offers to help you with the cleaning, and he's more than happy to let you climb up his shoulders to reach those high places. It makes him happy to know he can lend a hand.

"MC, I already cleaned over here so you don't have to do it. I cleaned there, too. That means you don't have anything else to do, so why don't you have a lunch break with me? It's not good to work so hard all the time."

Belphie

Belphie's one for the more observant brothers, so your clean freak habits didn't go unnoticed. He didn't know if you were obsessed with cleaning, or if you genuinely enjoyed it, but at least you were doing it without a fuss?

And man did you do a good job. Everywhere you cleaned was left with the lingering smell of vanilla and lavender, and... you know, the smell is making him sleepy.

Every pillow his head touches seems especially fluffy, too! When he found out you made a regular habit of washing and fluffing them, and they smell amazing... He feels like he's laying on a cloud...

He won't admit it genuinely, but he really does love what you're doing with the place. It makes him feel a little fuzzy inside when he finds his pillow on his bed, freshly laundered and soft to the touch. He clings to it extra tight those nights.

"You know if you keep this up, I might prefer the pillows to your lap. Ah, but don't worry, I don't really mean it. There's no way a pillow could replace you, no matter how good it smells. I think."

#I can vibe with this because I clean pretty often when I'm stressed and I just generally enjoy most cleaning #obey me #obey me!#obey me shall we date #obey me! shall we date?#shall we date? obey me!#shall we date obey me #obey me lucifer #obey me headcanons #obey me imagines #obey me writing #obey me scenarios #obey me mammon #obey me levi #obey me satan #obey me asmo #obey me beel #obey me belphie

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fiberslut · 2 years ago

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Apparently the multiverse is real

Chapter 4: God bless America

Masterlist

previous | next

Pairing: the avengers x reader

Disclaimer: English is not my first language so you may find some funny words/sentences or broken grammar in here. I'll say sorry in advance but I've tried my best.

Summary: You accidentally travel to Marvel universe(not earth-616), but luckily you've got your phone with you. You may ask what do you mean luckily, just read this fiction.

I've stayed in the tower for about 2 weeks now. Tony didn't just let me eat, sleep and repeat. Instead, he put me in the training sessions with Natasha and Clint.

"You're doing great Y/N" Natasha winks at me

"I bet you can now beat all of the Widows out there" Clint pants on the ground

"Well.. I learned from the best" I've trained for 2 hours now but honestly I don't feel tired at all

"I think we should end it for today, Clint and I have some birthday to attend" Natasha says as she walks to the lockers

"Oh, it's Cooper's birthday right?" Yeah I think I can remember Clint's son's birthday

"Yeah. He's turning 23 this year. They just grow so fast" Clint sighs

"Soo.. he's the same age as you, Y/N?" Natasha looks at me teasingly

I know what Natasha try to imply

"Yeah yeah, and stop trying to set me up with him, I'm really not interested in anyone right now" When I was in my world, I would simp over all of these heroes, I mean look at their faces, their arms, their abs. Those comic suits are just super tight. But when I finally met them in real life, I was kinda intimidated. I mean they are real people. There are some differences. Or maybe I just prefer the 2D guys.

"And also I can not leave the tower. You know?" Yes, I can say that Tony is imprisoned me. He got this new security system that I can not hack. It would change its own password every time if someone typed the wrong password.

"Well, you two have fun ok? Maybe bring some leftover cake in for tomorrow too" I say and waving them a goodbye

And now I was left alone again.

I walked to my room, took a cold shower, and now I'm lying in my bed, playing with my phone. I don't know if my phone has some bugs or if it wasn't meant for multiversal traveling but my battery has been 100% all along since I arrived here. But I guess it's a good thing because of course I didn't bring any chargers with me. And yes I did try to find some charger, but it looks like in this universe, no one knows about my phone brand.

I wonder what would happen in my real world, is my mom gonna be shocked if she couldn't find me in my bedroom the next morning? who's gonna do my laundry? what if my professor gives me F for not attending classes?

As I was drowning in my own thought. My bedroom door swung open.

"What do you want Tony?"

"Get ready, we're going out"

"Where? Can we just go tomorrow? I'm super tired right now?"

"Do you want to go back to your universe or not?"

"Say no more pops" I jump out of my bed and run to my walk-in closet to start throwing some clothes on me

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

At the Avengers mansion

"Why did I have to live in that tower when you have this big a** mansion?" I turn to Tony as I can see how big the Avengers mansion is

"You didn't tell me you want to live here"

"Well. I didn't know that YOU who already has a gigantic tower in the middle of the city would have another enormous mansion in the same city too"

"And you said you know everything about everyone"

Tony really tests me so much lately.

"Well Tony Stark in my universe only has a tower and it has been sold to Reed Richard now"

"That is nonsense, why would I sell MY tower to that man? Smartest man alive? My a**, did you know that he kick me out of the Illuminati? My own secret team? that son of a bi***"

"Language. Tony. There are a lot of minors living here according to my good memories about the Avengers mansion"

"Yeah, and today we're visiting one of them too"

"Who?" I have no idea what Tony's planning to do

"First. Let's go inside"

Tony scans his eye to the door and the access granted. We walk inside the mansion. And I am just speechless. It is sooo big and so gorgeous. It's giving the old money vibe. Nothing says Tony Stark. No hi-tech monitor, no talking security system.

"Wait here" Tony says and walks into another room

I sit on a couch and look at the picture near it. It was a picture of the Young Avengers. Wow, they're not anything like the Young Avengers from where I'm from. They're comic accurate I would say.

"Is she here yet little hawkeye?" I can hear Tony's voice from another room

"She's upstairs, I'll text her, and stop calling me that. My name is Kate" I guess that would be Kate Bishop who's Tony talking to

Whoosh!

Ouch. What is that noise? It is so loud.

"Stop doing that inside of the house. Your portal is burning the carpet again" Kate scolds

Portal?

Oh my god. How could I never think of her in the first place?

Then Tony walks back to the room I'm sitting in.

"Here. Y/N. Let's meet America Chavez"

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

So now America Chavez is the 3rd person who knows about me coming from another universe.

"Can you really bring me back to my universe?" I ask her

"Yes. I never fail" She answers proudly

"Then.. what're we waiting for?" Tony adds

"You want me to open a star portal here? In this room Mr.Stark?"

America asks and looks at the other room with a concerned look

"Yeah you're right, let's go outside, is the backyard ok?" He asks

"That'll do sir"

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

In the backyard

"ok Y/N, are you ready?" America asks

"ok, I'm ready. Let's do it" I hold my breath as she holds my hand

Then she tries to punch something in the air for about 2-3 times

"Why is it not working?" She asks herself

"What do you mean it's not working? You said you can control it now young lady" Tony asks

"And I mean it sir. This week, I've been traveling through a lot of universes" America panicked and look at her hand, still trying to create a portal by punching the air

"Hey. It's ok. I'm not in a hurry" I try to calm her down

"Y/N, wait here for me ok?" She says and lets go of my hand. She closes her eye and punches the air again. Now there it is. A star portal.

"See? sir. I can really control it. I can open a portal. This is a portal to my universe" She talks to Tony

"What about her universe?" Tony means mine

"I don't know sir. I can't open a portal to her universe. It's like I can't reach her universe. It's like her universe is not in the same system as ours"

Taglist

@ayoelouise

@potatopfft

@welconme-notreally

@niccino-apino

@emily-roberts

@local-mr-frog

#the avengers x you #the avengers x reader #the avengers x y/n #tony stark x daughter #imagine #doctor strange x reader #steve rogers x reader #peter parker x reader #bucky barns x reader #natasha x reader #clint x reader #amercia chavez #kate bishop #young avengers

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borathae · 3 years ago

Text

↳ Index [Chapter 16 - Worth Staying Better For]

Genre: Smut, Fluff, Romance

Warnings: a few anxious thoughts in the beginning, domestic bliss, sub!Jungkook, dom!reader, mommy kink, morning sex, oral sex (m. & f.receiving), dry humping, multiple orgasms, spanking, she also rides him, choking, loving dirty talk, Koo is a needy and vocal bunny, they are so in love :(

Wordcount: 8.3k

a/n: I’M LITERALLY GONNA FLING MYSELF OFF MY BED PLEASE I LOVE THIS COUPLE SO MUCH!! But on a calmer note, thank you guys. Thank you for all your support and for coming with me on this very emotional journey. This has been such a beautiful ride and aaol is genuinely one of my favourite stories I’ve ever written and I am happy that so many other people seemed to have shared this love with me. Truly I appreciate you so much! 💜

Jungkook is running. He hasn’t been running that quickly in ages. He is running and he loves it, because he is running for a reason.

He will finally see you again.

After four endless weeks in New York he will finally see you again.

He doesn’t even feel the luggage in his hand. Nor does he feel the uncomfortable shoes on his feet, which until recently had annoyed the living shit out of him.

Jungkook collides with the elevator wall, but doesn’t feel it. He pants, stares at himself in the mirrored wall and smiles.

He will finally see you again.

He missed you so fucking much. Quick phone calls between meetings and the occasional video calls were the only chances at getting something You.

It drove him insane. During the day he was at least busy enough to find distractions from the constant ache of missing you, but the nights were the worst. He realised that he became so used to sleeping next to you that a lonely bed almost drove him insane.

The elevator opens with a ding.

Jungkook steps through the threshold and already calls out your name, taking little care that it was three in the morning and that he had neighbours.

"I'm home!"

The elevator closes behind him.

"My love, I'm home!"

Jungkook abandons the luggage by the elevator and runs.

"___!"

The bedroom is empty.

Jungkook halts and furrows his brows.

"What the hell?"

He turns a few times in case you were hiding somewhere and wanted to scare him. It wouldn’t be the first time that you would attempt to do something like that.

"My love?"

The living room, the bathroom, the kitchen. All empty.

"I'm home from New York!"

Your shared closet, the private gym, your yoga room.

All empty.

"___ that's not funny anymore!"

Jungkook runs and he doesn’t like it anymore.

The guestrooms, the other bathrooms, the playroom.

All empty.

"Please answer me!"

He stumbles and runs.

The pool on the roof, the sauna, the library, your bedroom one last time.

"___?"

The bathroom one last time.

"My love?"

The kitchen one last time.

"What the hell?"

Jungkook collapses on the barstool and pulls out his phone.

"Where the hell are you?"

He dials your number.

It goes straight to voicemail.

"Fuck."

He types a text with shaking fingers.

- Jungkook: where are you?

You don’t receive it.

- Jungkook: I'm worried. Are you okay?

You don’t receive it.

- Jungkook: Please call me when you get that.

- Jungkook: please

- Jungkook: :*

- Jungkook: ❤

- Jungkook: okay I'll stop spamming you now

You don’t receive any of the messages.

Jungkook calls you one last time only to speak to your voicemail immediately.

"Fuck", he exclaims, dropping the phone on the table and burying his face in his hands.

He was so excited to see you again and now you are gone. Jungkook stumbles off the barstool and runs. He just thought of something.

The shared closet.

He must check if your clothes are still here. Maybe you left him. Maybe you just up and left and now you are ghosting him.

He checks every shelf, every hook, every clothing rack, every drawer. All your clothes are still here.

Your suitcase is still here too.

So are your shoes.

He feels a little better as he leaves for the living room. His brain just bombarded him with the worst scenario again. You didn’t leave him.

Unless…

His knees buckle, he collapses on the couch.

You could have been in an accident. That's why your phone goes straight to voicemail because it got wrecked in the accident.

Jungkook gags, throwing his hand over his mouth to stop himself from throwing up.

You could be dead right now and he would have no idea.

"Nononono."

He turns on the news with shaking fingers, checking the news on his phone simultaneously.

Nothing about an accident. At least not one that would fit your description. No murder or kidnapping either.

He sighs in relief.

Unless….

He begins shaking.

It could have happened too recently that the reporters haven’t even reached the side yet. It could happen right this moment!

Jungkook tries to call you again. Nothing.

He texts you.

- Jungkook: I'm going crazy. Are you alright?

- Jungkook: my love please pick up

- Jungkook: why can’t you receive texts?

- Jungkook: do you need help?

- Jungkook: I'm sorry if I did something wrong…

- Jungkook: please call me

- Jungkook: 😭😭😭

They don’t go through.

"Fucking fuck!" he yells.

He tries to call you one last time, but it's only voicemail.

He checks the news again then every room in the house. He checks your chat to see if you have received his messages yet. You haven’t.

"Fuck oh god fuck."

He dials another number now and hopes they pick up. If he doesn’t call her now he will throw up and probably die from anxious heart palpitations.

"Jungkook? What's the matter? We don’t have our session until Tuesday yet. Are you okay?" his therapist's voice doesn’t sound tired, as if she was still awake.

"I think ___ is dead" he blurts out and starts crying.

"Whoa, whoa, whoa hold up. Say that again."

"I, I t-think ___ is dead", he stutters and wails.

"What makes you think that? Are you with her right now? Did you call the ambulance already?"

"No she, she isn’t home and, and her phone isn’t receiving m-my messages. I don’t know where she is. I'm sure she is dead, she is dead."

"So she isn’t at work tonight?"

Jungkook halts.

"At work?"

"Yes, you told me about her work and that she always works until seven. Did she tell you that she wouldn’t go to work tonight?"

"Oh god", Jungkook twists his own hair, "I'm so fucking stupid I didn’t even think of her work."

"No? Well, then I am sure that she is only busy at work and can’t look at her phone right now. Don’t you agree?"

"Yes", he rubs at his eyes both to get rid of the tears and in embarrassment, "yes, I agree. Fucking hell I'm an idiot."

"Hey, that is alright. Logical thinking tends to turn off in panic situations. But how are you feeling right now Jungkook? Are you feeling better or should we practice the breathing exercises I showed you?"

"No, uhm no I'm alright. Just embarrassed."

He laughs awkwardly and his therapist laughs with him.

"That is alright. So we will see each other on Tuesday at seven?"

"Yes, we'll see each other", he murmurs, "thank you, I know it's way past your office hours so thank you."

"That's alright Jungkook."

"Have a good night then."

"You too."

He ends the phone call and feels a lot better. He opens your chat and types.

- Jungkook: please ignore every previous message. I just remembered that you’re at work. Sorry for overreacting.

- Jungkook: 😣❤

Then he drops his phone on the coffee table and goes to bed.

He needs to sleep that stress away.

Fingers dance down his temple. It makes him open his eyes.

"Hey there handsome", you greet him with fondness in your eyes.

"___", he says with his voice barely audible in sleep.

"I read your messages. You had a really bad night didn’t you?" you ask, massaging his brow and temple softly.

Jungkook closes his eyes again and nods his head with a tiny pout on his lips.

"Awww baby. I'm here now though and I'm safe and sound", you kiss his ear.

He purrs in happiness, rubbing his face against your body sleepily.

"I'm just fucking exhausted", you say and drop yourself into the pillows.

Jungkook is snuggled up to you in an instant, arm slung around you and leg thrown over your hips.

He doesn’t tell you that he missed you because his tongue is too tired to work, but you understand him nonetheless.

"Missed you too Bunny", you whisper, nuzzling your nose into his soft hair and closing your eyes.

You and him drift off to sleep a moment later, only waking up when the sun has long passed its zenith.

Jungkook wakes up with an ache between his legs. It is a pleasant, warm ache.

He stirs and moans softly.

He must be dreaming.

Oh this is so nice. So goddamn nice. So warm and nice.

He purrs, rolling his head to the side.

This is the best dream ever. He never wants it to stop.

"Oh!"

That was a surprisingly wet sensation right now.

Slurping which correlates with a harsh sucking sensation around his cock.

Jungkook opens his eyes and looks down.

"Oh god", he laughs breathlessly and drops his head in the pillows, throwing his arm over his eyes, "baby…."

You release his cock with a loud bop, jerking him off slowly instead.

"Good morning Bunny."

"Good m-morning."

The sloppy lick up his frenulum made him stutter.

"I was hungry for you."

You sink down on his cock and begin bopping your head up and down slowly.

Jungkook moans loudly, fingers twisting in your messy bed hair as best as the tiredness allows him to.

"Fucking hell my love", he breathes, "this is fucking amazing."

You continue bopping your head up and down, rolling his balls between your fingers slowly. It is remarkable how tight they already are. One month without you affected him more than he wants to admit.

How disappointing, you thought that you played with him on the phone enough. After all, you had to make a folder with all the very hot jerk off videos he sent you this month. And that one occasion where he fucked himself crazy on his favourite dildo during your video call is burned into your memories until eternity.

You thought that you played enough with him, but turns out that you didn’t as he squirms and mewls underneath you, coating your tongue with his precum.

"Please slow down, please slow, I'm so fucking close", he begs, moaning deliciously afterwards.

You growl hungrily and take more of him in.

"Seriously p-please slow d-down", he pants, trying to pull you off by your hair.

It only makes you sink down further, makes you bop your head faster and mewl louder.

Jungkook shakes and writhes, moaning loudly with his mouth agape. He is burning up. It is too much, feels too good. Thirty days without your mouth and now he finally has you again. He can barely handle it, twisting your hair to ground himself in some way.

His precum is starting to taste more and more of his actual cum. Addicting really, running down your throat. You go deeper, burying your nose in his pubic hair and moaning around his throbbing cock.

"Slow, slow, slow. Don’t wanna cum. Slow please. Please, please."

You pull off, give him one second to breathe and then sink down on him again, fucking your own mouth on his cock at inhuman speeds.

Jungkook yelps up and bucks his hips up, propping his own legs up on the mattress, almost closing them around your head.

"I'm cumming. Please stop. I'm cumming." Too late. Jungkook climaxes down your throat in a series of babbled curses and snotty, teeth grinding sobs, legs shaking like crazy and stomach contracting uncontrollably.

"My love…" he sighs squeakily and slacks against the mattress, head rolling to the side and lips parting in quick and high-pitched pants.

You clean him up with loud, hungry slurps, finishing it off with a long kiss to his heated tip.

He shivers and whimpers at the feeling, fingers twitching on his stomach. He is so adorable when he recovers, it makes you want to shower him in adoration.

You lift yourself, leaving one sensual love bite on the inside of his thigh before kissing your way up his body until you have his neck under your lips. You suck a big hickey on his skin before you even as much as kiss it. His skin looked way too untouched for your taste, like an empty canvas just screaming to be covered by your paintings of love.

"My love", he sighs, head dizzy in a mixture of his afterglow and the sting of the hickey.

You giggle and let go of his skin, kissing the mark you left behind.

"Now you’re mine again", you whisper, biting down on his earlobe next.

He mewls, barely turning his head.

"Your taste is addicting, Bunny", you rasp.

"Mhm."

His body is growing softer, heavy eyelids refusing to open and pouty lips parted.

"You sleepy?" you ask him, caressing the slope of his nose repeatedly.

"Mhm."

You blop down on his body, feeling his left arm around you in an instant.

"Mhm."

You chuckle, "fine", you close your eyes, "it's too early anyway."

And then you and him fall asleep again despite it not being too early at all. On the contrary you and him should get up and seize the day, but that sounds more like torture than anything else.

You are resting on your stomach with one leg pulled up. You were sleeping a second before, now you aren’t so much anymore.

You are awake enough to be painstakingly aware of the wet tongue lapping at your pussy. And you are awake enough to roll your hips back slowly.

"Bunny", you moan sleepily.

The tongue leaves your middle.

"It's my turn now", he breathes, "relax my love, I’ll treat you so well."

He connects his lips with your pussy again, sucking your clit eagerly. You purr, closing your eyes and smiling lazily.

What a way to be woken up. His pouty lips wrapped around your clit and his tongue lapping up your juices. This is the type of wake up call you missed the most this month.

"You're such a good boy, Bunny", you praise, lifting your hips.

He supports you in an instant, licking and sucking your clit hungrily now that he can reach it even better.

"That's it, keep going", you sigh, resorting to moaning afterwards.

You hate to admit that the month without him made you just as sensitive as it made him. You thought that touching yourself to his videos or cam shows was enough to get you satisfied. Or that using some of the sextoys in your playroom would do the trick. But it didn’t. You are so goddamn sensitive to his tongue and you love it.

"Closer Bunny."

Jungkook presses himself closer with a squeaky whimper, frenching your pussy messily.

"That's perfect. Fuck Bunny you are gonna make me cum."

He sucks your clit eagerly, flicking his tongue over it quickly afterwards.

"Ah!" you flinch away before fucking yourself back against his tongue.

He moans and continues his fast flicks, rutting the mattress needily. You taste so sweet, oh you taste so incredibly sweet.

"I'm gonna cum", you moan.

Jungkook puts even more passion into his make out session with your pussy, the coil in your stomach tightens.

"Now, oh Bunny, now."

He takes your orgasm with happy moans and his eyes squeezed shut. You tingle from the crown of your head all the way down to the tips of your toes. You are convulsing, twisting the pillows and mewling his name. That's what you wanted for literal weeks.

"Fuck", you relax in a shake.

Jungkook kisses his way up your body, taking the paths of your back. He presses himself close once he has reached your face, nuzzling his nose against your neck.

"I'm so hard for you", he confesses shakily, rutting his hard cock against your ass, "can I slip it in, please?"

"Bunny", you breathe still halfway gone on your cloud nine. You are so dizzy from your high.

He presses himself closer, now rubbing his leaking cock through your soaked folds. It makes you tingle in the electricity of overstimulation, deep purr rattling in your chest.

"Oh fuck", he chokes out, "you're so wet and soft."

His hips speed up, fucking his length through your folds as if he wanted to chase his orgasm just like this.

His hot breath tickles your neck, his damp chest rubs against your back and his legs are squeezing your own every now and then.

"Can I slip it in? Please say yes. Hurry please", he begs.

You stay silent, enjoying the sensations. His hips are still taking on their needy rhythm, grinding his throbbing cock against your leaking pussy. He is going faster than before, jerking himself off to the feeling of your soaked folds.

"Please", he squeaks, "say yes."

His hips stutter, he presses out a curse. His hips find their rhythm again, his arms are shaking. Faster and faster, sloppier and sloppier. Jungkook is chasing the pleasure like a desperate animal.

"Mommy please", he tries, soiling your neck with sloppy kisses, "say yes p-please."

His hips stutter.

"Oh no", he squeaks and freezes up, "no, oh, oH, OH."

Jungkook climaxes against your pussy, humping your body like a desperate little bunny whilst squeaking.

It was exhilarating to feel, if you didn’t enjoy his high pitched yet embarrassed sounds so much, you would have moaned right with him.

"No", he sobs, "no", he shudders in a desperate sob, "mommy I'm so sorry I made a mess."

"You are such a disobedient boy, Bunny", you finally speak, "did I give you permission to cum on my pussy?"

"No mommy you didn’t", he whimpers.

"So why did you?"

"Because I'm a disobedient boy. Please mommy discipline me."

"Get off of me."

Jungkook rolls off of you with his limbs feeling like jello.

You flip over.

He stares at you with his cheeks beet red and his dark hair sticking to his forehead. His nipples are swollen and hard, the skin around them has reddened in embarrassment and arousal. And his poor cock. Oh it was still so hard and swollen, covered in the mess he made.

"Get on your back, legs up."

Jungkook obeys, pulling his legs to his chest and grasping them tightly.

You take over a moment later, lifting them up as best to his abilities.

He mewls now that you force him to present everything like that, head becoming dizzy as he feels himself falling deeper and deeper into subspace. He is feeling high on endorphins right now.

"Start counting."

He mewls.

"One."

You spank his right ass cheeks, watching how it makes his cock twitch.

"Oh mommy", he chokes out.

"Count", you order.

"Two", he keens.

You spank his left ass cheek, basking in the way his asshole clenches and relaxes a few times.

"Three."

Right side again, his cock twitches.

He moans and swallows heavily.

"I don't hear you Bunny."

"Fo-" he swallows again, "four."

Left side, he is sobbing softly. His skin is so perfectly warm and tender under your palm.

"Go on Bunny almost there."

"Five, please, five."

Slap.

His legs twitch, almost slipping from your grip. You tighten your fingers.

He grunts, "six."

Slap.

"Ah!"

You made it sting because of his leg wiggling, the punishment was necessary. Even if he seems to enjoy it quite a lot. He clenches around nothing, cock slapping against his stomach all on it's own.

"Go on, Bunny. Four more to go."

"Seven", he begs.

Right side, next to the already pink handprint. The spank leaves another red imprint.

"Oh my god I wanna cum so bad", he sobs and writhes.

"Don't care. Count."

"W-where was I?"

"I don't know Bunny", you caress his buttocks tauntingly, "where were you?"

He whimpers.

"E-eight?"

Slap.

You made sure to hit the exact spot you hit before. It makes him choke on a moan, legs threatening to slip out of your fingers again.

"Correct", you caress his burning cheek, "now what comes after eight?"

"Nine, please mommy, it's nine."

The right cheek. His poor rim is clenching around nothing desperately.

"And?"

"Ten, ten, ten", he chants.

Slap.

"Ten!"

A shudder, his cock throbs angrily.

"Oh god mommy, it burns."

"Burns?"

"Yes so good", he keens, making you smile fondly.

You set his legs down, parting them so you could crawl between them.

He gazes up at you through half-lidded eyes, body trembling beneath you.

"What are we saying now, Bunny?"

"Thank you mommy", he lulls.

"That's right", you smile and begin rolling your hips against him.

His eyes widen, he moans loudly.

"What is it? Are you imagining how it would feel if I fucked your cute bum right now?"

He nods his head, closing his legs behind your thighs and arching his back.

"Did I allow you to fantasise like that?"

He tenses up, dropping his back and forcing his eyes open.

"No, I’m sorry."

You smile tauntingly.

"That's", you thrust your hips into him "what", another thrust, shaking him, "I thought", you growl, grinding up and down on his parts most sensitive.

Jungkook's eyelids flutter, pouty lips parting in a silent moan.

"You are not going to cum again, are you?"

He shakes his head, eyes closing further as his legs press you closer to get more of the sensation.

"Yeah? Cause it looks to me like you are halfway there already."

"You're my high", he whispers.

Your heart flutters like crazy.

"You're gonna make me fluster if you talk like this Bunny."

He opens his eyes and moans, reaching for your wrist to hold them tenderly. He is arching for you, looking so completely devoted to you that it is impossible to look away.

"Please take me", he begs in a breathy moan, voice so perfectly pitched.

"I can't resist you, my sweet Bunny", you draw closer, "I want you."

"I, I want you too mommy...please...take me", he sighs, pressing himself to you in a sinful arch of his dainty body.

The temptation is too grande to resist. You really can’t wait any longer. You need him to connect with you again.

You prop yourself up and crawl on his lap. You can’t wait any longer. You grasp his cock, guiding it through your folds. Jungkook shudders below you, twisting the edge of the pillow. You watch his fingers, oh how perfectly they clutch the fabric. It tempts you, makes you greedy for the feeling.

"Hold my hips Bunny", you order him.

He reaches for them instantly, resting his strong, tender hands on your hips.

"That's it, now don’t let go", you say and sink down slowly.

"Mommy", he chokes out, squeezing your hips. He is finally home again.

"I've missed your cock so much Bunny", you sigh, rolling your hips back and forth slowly. You have finally found your missing piece again.

You rest your hands on the pillow beside his head, gazing into his eyes deeply as you continue rocking on his length.

He can barely keep his eyes open, feeling himself falling more and more.

"Don't let go, do you hear me Bunny?"

He nods his head obediently and moans.

His hands run up and down your dancing hips, caressing you with so much devotion that your skin tingles in his touch.

"You are doing so well for me. Do you know that? Do you know that nobody else can make me feel like you?"

He whimpers, furrowing his brows. His eyelids flutter, lips parted in continuous moans.

"Look at me."

He opens his eyes, cock throbbing inside of you.

"Do you know that you are the best, Bunny?"

He shakes his head. It makes you furrow your brows.

"No?"

He shakes his head again.

"Oh Bunny…"

You stop your slow rolls and begin bouncing up and down on his length.

"Ah!" he yelps, eyes closing in an instant and body shuddering wildly.

"Then I just have to show you."

You continue bouncing up and down on him, running your fingers through his damp hair and watching his pretty face morph into the prettiest of expressions.

You are soaking his length, warm walls keeping him inside with a greedy squeeze. You feel pearls of sweat run down along your spine. It tickles slightly.

His cock is throbbing so much, feeling so swollen and hot inside of you that it makes your toes curl.

"Can you feel it now Bunny? Can you feel that you are the best?"

He nods his head.

"Then tell me."

He peels his eyes open and begins blushing. Even the tip of his nose is turning rosy.

"Don't be shy Bunny. Tell me that you are the best."

"I-I’m the b-best", he stutters, fingers squeezing your hips.

"Say it again. Tell me that you are the best", you order him, motivating him with smooth rolls.

"The best", he chokes out.

"No, no. Say it. You are the best."

He whimpers, lips closing and parting. You caress his cheek with the back of your hand.

"Say it for mommy, Bunny", you whisper.

"I'm the best", he whispers back, throbbing inside of you.

"That's it", you say and moan loudly, "oh Bunny you are the best."

"I'm the best", he moans softly and closes his eyes.

You watch a glimmering pearl escape from the corner of his eye and run down his cheek.

"Yes, exactly. The best. My Bunny is the best", you say, kissing the tear away with adoration on your lips.

You change your bounces to the smooth rolls of before, moving up and down his length with your every fourth roll. Jungkook is squirming, thighs every so often meeting your movements as they leave the mattress in desperate twitches. You slam your hips down just that harder each time that happens, listening to the ecstatic moans it elicits from his pink, pouty lips.

"How are you doing Bunny?" you ask him, voice shaking in pleasure.

"Mommy I can’t take much more", he squeaks, fingers bruising your hips.

"Colour?"

"Green, but I wanna cum."

"God Bunny, you are so sensitive today."

"I missed you so much this month."

Your hips connect in a deep roll, driving a moan out of both of you.

"I missed you too. Just hold on for a little longer. I'm almost there."

He whimpers but nods in obedience.

"Can I help?"

"Yes Bunny, you can help."

Jungkook abandons your right hip to lick his own thumb. He looks so messy in doing so, lapping at his digit with spit going everywhere.

"So messy", you taunt, rolling circles up and down on his cock.

You watch the string of saliva connect his thumb with his tongue as he pulls back, gasping softly once it breaks.

Your eyes meet, a dark smirk curls at your lips. He looks so tauntingly shy as if he knew that you liked the view but feels embarrassed under your gaze. How adorable and tempting.

"You're my messy, little Bunny."

He lets out a soft sound of agreement, melting beneath you. He is melting even more when he can watch your face light up in bliss and feel your walls convulsing around him the moment his thumb begins drawing circles on your clit.

"Oh you are such a good boy", you moan, head falling to the front.

Your fingers twist in his hair, your chest presses against his'.

"Keep going Bunny, this is going to make me cum", you encourage him in a breathy voice and deep, smooth rolls of your hips.

"Oh god mommy I wanna cum so bad", he keens, glassy eyes glued to your scrunched up face.

"Hold on a little longer Bunny. Do it for me."

"Mommy", he whines, but holds on.

He holds back for you because as good as his orgasm would feel right now, he knows that it will feel even better if he holds on and cums with your permission.

"Good Bunny", you praise, leaning down to kiss his lips messily.

His cock throbs, his tongue licks over your lips hungrily, his chest shudders in a needy moan.

You break the kiss, twisting his hair. The eye contact brings him close to swooning.

"I'm cumming Bunny", you sigh and then your eyes roll to the back of your skull and your body begins quaking on top of him.

Jungkook fucks into you while you are orgasming with desperate squeaks leaving him. His thumb touches your clit the entire time. He wants you to enjoy your high to the fullest.

"Oh Bunny", you come down with a happy smile.

You open your eyes, meeting the devoted obsession in his gaze.

"It hurts mommy", he chokes out.

You smile and cup his cheek.

"You were so good", you praise.

You begin moving your hips again, listening to him moan at the tight squeeze.

"Mommy please."

"Cum for me Bunny", you allow him.

Jungkook is falling apart. His mouth is agape in silent moans, his head thrown back. His eyelids are still slightly open, showing nothing but white as his eyes have long rolled to the back of his head.

His fingers are gripping your hips, nails painting deep crescent moons on your skin. His cock is throbbing and twitching, coating your warm walls with his cum.

"Oh god ___", he sobs, slacking against the mattress.

You relax into him, allowing him to stay inside for now. It's so exciting to still feel him throb even now when his high has long ebbed.

"You did so well Bunny", you praise, running your fingers through his messy hair as you listen to his rapid heartbeat.

He exhales shakily and hugs you.

"I don't think I was ever that horny before, like ever", he murmurs, making you laugh.

"Honestly? Same", you confess and chuckle, "you literally got me fucked Kookie."

"Yeah", he laughs breathlessly, "same here."

You and him roll to the side, which sadly makes his softening cock slip out and also his cum gush everywhere.

"Ew", you cringe.

"Yeah I felt it too."

"I should probably go to the toilet."

"Yeah me too."

You and him draw closer, hugging each other despite the mess between your legs.

"I think it can wait ten minutes, right?"

"Yeah I think so too", Jungkook agrees and kisses your lips, "I seriously missed you so much in New York."

You smile tiredly, looking at his eyes in a blur because you can’t make your eyes to do the work of focusing.

"I missed you too, this place is way too big for one person."

He agrees with a hum.

"Yeah I know, it feels so much more like home since you’re here."

Your heart flutters.

"Yeah? Even the pillows?"

"No", he closes his eyes and snuggles into your chest, "no the pillows are awful."

You laugh softly, braiding your fingers through his hair.

"You love them, admit it."

"No I hate them", he mumbles sleepily.

"Rude", you grin, closing your eyes and burying your nose in his soft hair. You inhale deeply. Like almond flowers and vanilla. You missed this smell so much.

He inhales and exhales, growing softer in your arms.

"Sleepy?"

He nods his head barely.

"Then let’s clean up later and sleep for now."

"Okay", he breathes.

"Okay", you whisper, relaxing against him and allowing sleep to take over you once again.

It is Jungkook who wakes up later than you. He peels his eyes open with a smile, because he knows that he can finally look at you again. Except that he can’t. He furrows his brows. Your side is empty, the duvet crumbled up in a little pile by the foot end of the bed.

“My love?”

Jungkook sits up, blinking a few times as this makes his head terribly dizzy.

“Urgh god”, he groans, seeing black for a few seconds and feeling his head pound like crazy.

Stupid iron deficiency. He blinks and finally sees again.

“My love?” he tries again, but the bedroom stays silent.

He looks at the balcony doors. Maybe you are outside for some fresh air. They are closed, showing the night sky to him.

“Well fuck”, he says and chuckles, “that’s to oversleeping.”

He yawns, stretches his arms above his head and decides to roll out of bed.

“I need to piss”, he murmurs, waddling to the bathroom.

Jungkook sits down with a yawn, letting everything run free and scanning his surroundings. The folds in your towel are different from last night and the edges were slightly darker than the rest, which means you took a shower recently.

Good. That means you were still in the apartment with him. You didn’t leave. Jungkook hates his brain for always thinking the worst thing first, but he just can’t help but worry each time he wakes up to an empty bed. He became a lot better at labelling those thoughts as “nothing but intrusive thoughts of panic” with the help of his therapist and these days when he gets them he forces himself to stay calm and remind himself that you were probably just up earlier than him.

Jungkook stands up and flushes, yawning again as he waddles over to the shower. He turns the water on, sticking his hand under it to check the temperature. Cold for two seconds then it starts to get warm. He steps underneath it and lets it trickle over him with his eyes closed.

Jungkook decides to blow dry his hair tonight. He looks at the crazy mop of hair once finished, trying to smooth it down with a few skilled tugs and combs of his fingers.

He grins.

“She’ll like it”, he decides, staring at the messy bangs he created in the front. They stick into his eyes just slightly, tickling his lashes.

Then he leaves the bathroom to get random sweatpants from his dressing room. He doesn’t bother for a shirt, feeling way too heated after blowdrying his hair.

“My love”, he calls out as he wanders through the apartment.

He finally finds you in the kitchen in one of his shirts. You have your back turned to him, stirring something in a pan over the oven. Jungkook feels his mouth water at the smell and his heart begin to race at the sight.

He watches you for a little, watches you hurry from one end to the counter back to the oven with a little sway in your hips and watches you be so completely content with yourself. You are literally so beautiful, he thinks.

And then he has to think of her. The woman who broke his heart. He thinks of her and he thanks her for breaking his heart because if she hadn’t then he wouldn’t be standing in the kitchen right now, watching the love of his life cook him breakfast in one of his shirts.

He thinks of her for the last time and smiles. Who would have thought.

"Good morning."

You turn.

"More like good ten o'clock at night."

He chuckles, so do you.

He breaks the distance between you and him and gives you one of his worldfamous backhugs, resting his chin on your shoulder. You melt into him happily.

"I'm still sleepy, you know", he says, swaying your bodies from side to side gently.

You rest your head back against his chest and close your eyes.

"Yeah, feel you. I haven't slept well lately. It’s catching up on me now."

"Why? Did the nightmares return?"

"No. The bed's just way too big for one person."

Jungkook smiles and nudges your cheek with the tip of his nose before kissing it softly.

"Yeah, feel you. Although I could finally go full starfish in New York."

You turn, watching him demonstrate it.

"Like this", he says, "and I did it naked once too."

You laugh.

"Yeah?"

He nods his head.

"Didn’t like it, I crushed my balls when I flipped over."

"Kook", you snort and wheeze.

He laughs with you, stomach tingling like crazy.

"You stupid noodle", you say and turn back to the stove.

He steps closer and hugs your waist.

"What can I do? What are we making?"

"Japchae and you can prepare the vegetables."

"On it", he grabs them, "did you wash them?"

"Nope."

"Alrighty right", he says, listening to the soft chuckle you do at his words, grinning to himself.

You work in silence for a little while, enjoying the sounds of the meat sizzling and Jungkook cutting the vegetables rhythmically. Just every so often you need to tell him to tone down on the veggy snacking or else nothing will be left for the japchae. He gave you a cute grin each time.

You are the first one to actually break the silence.

"Did you check our kimchi fridge already?"

"Why? Is it leaking water again?"

He waddles over to it.

"I swear to god I shouldn’t curse cause it's one of our models, but piece of shit technology who invented you?" he grumbles.

You laugh, "just look inside Kook."

Jungkook opens the fridge and furrows his brows.

"Huh?"

He turns to you.

"Did you make kimchi?"

"I didn't, I got it delivered."

"There are kimchi delivery services?" he blurts out, making you laugh.

"There aren’t, someone brought them over."

"Who?"

You sneak a glance at him.

"Your mum."

"Excuse me?"

"Your parents came over last week and brought us kimchi."

"Oh."

He blinks and looks to the side, rubbing his hand over his mouth. You put the pan off the flames and step closer to Jungkook.

"We talked for quite some time, they apologized to me and they wanted to know if you ever want to watch the seagulls with them again."

"They said that", he chokes out and blinks rapidly.

"Yes", you give him a smile.

"Oh god", he croaks, "please hug me I feel like crying."

“Aww baby, com’ere.”

You hug him tightly, running your fingers through his hair.

"Ha", he chokes out, "ha", and then he lets out sounds which sound like sobs and laughter at the same time, "ha", he nuzzles his face into your shoulder and squeezes you tightly.

"You okay?"

He nods his head.

"We always watched the seagulls together when I was a boy."

"Oh Kookie. That's so cute."

"They want to see them again with me."

He laughs again, squeezing your waist with all he got.

"I'm so happy for you baby."

Jungkook raises his head, letting you clean the tears from his lashes with his eyes closed and a droopy smile on his lips.

"Can I be honest with you?"

"Of course baby."

"I was really sad because of my parents. I just didn’t want to tell you so you wouldn’t feel responsible for it."

"I kinda figured."

"You did?"

"Yeah. Kinda."

"Oh", he looks to the side shyly, "did I make you feel like it?"

"You didn’t. I just figured that you miss them."

He pouts and nods his head.

"But now you don’t have to anymore."

"Yeah", he breathes and smiles his prettiest bunny smile.

It makes you so happy to see him happy that your chest feels like bursting. And so you hook your fingers behind his head and pull him into a sweet kiss, one he accepts with a soft sigh and his fingers grasping your back.

You pull back.

“I’m really happy for you”, you whisper and smile.

He blushes, lowering his eyes shyly.

“Thank you”, he murmurs.

“Also your dad is actually nice?” you say and laugh, “I was so ready to fight him at first, very violently if I may add, but he is actually nice?”

Jungkook giggles.

“Yeah I know, he can be such a dick sometimes, but in the core of his heart he is nice. He just needs some time to get used to new people.”

“Yeah I realised that. He even apologized to me and look”, you say and point at a little basil plant, “he gave me that as an apology present.”

Jungkook smiles, “that sounds like something my dad would do.”

“And we had dinner together and he was a little quiet there again, but nice. Your mom did most of the talking during dinner, she recommended me so many skincare products again”, you explain and giggle.

Jungkook chuckles, reaching out to tug a strand of hair behind your ear. You are so beautiful when you tell him a story. You get that really excited sparkle in your eyes. You didn’t have it in your eyes when you and him first met each other, but these days it is getting brighter and brighter. Jungkook is so obsessed with it. He cups your cheek and caresses your cheekbone with his thumb, listening to you with his head tilted to the side and his lips curled into a fond smile.

“And then we, we had cake a-and your dad cut my piece and offered it to me and it was really nice because he smiled at me”, you are so excited that you are stuttering.

“That’s so great”, Jungkook whispers, caressing your cheek. He feels his own heart heal just by listening to you rant about his family. Correction, your family.

“Your mom also said that your sister wants you and I to come over to her place for cookies with the girls and Yoongi. You should have seen my face when she said that. My eyes went like this”, you say and widen your eyes as best as possible.

Jungkook smiles, “see? I told you my sister is nice. She just did a terrible job at looking out for me.”

“Mhm”, you snort at the memory, “did you talk to her?”

He nods his head, “she actually thinks you are so, so awesome now.”

You roll your eyes and chuckle, “I’m sure she said it just like this”, you give his cheeks a little pinch.

Jungkook truly and honestly has never felt as warm in his chest as he does right now.

“Oh god”, you say and bury your face in his chest, “this feels so weird.”

“What does?”

“I don’t know, just….I have a family now”, you whisper, looking into his eyes.

Jungkook pets the back of your head, leaning in to kiss the tip of your nose.

“Get used to it, we aren’t gonna leave in a long time.”

You smile.

“Thank you”, you whisper.

Jungkook smiles. He knows that there is far more behind those two words than other people may think, but not him. He understands. He truly understands.

You rub his chest and giggle cutely.

“Come on now you cutie, I wanna eat. I’m literally starving.”

“Yeah, let’s eat. I’m so hungry too”, Jungkook agrees, following you to the stove by backhugging you and swaying your bodies from side to side with every step. It makes you laugh and in return it makes Jungkook laugh and life feels perfect.

You eat in the living room, both sat on the couch with your legs crossed and facing each other. You just have so much time to make up for. He never wants to stop looking at you and in return neither do you.

Jungkook shoves a big portion of japchae into his mouth and takes a piece of radish kimchi from his mum, chewing on it happily. You watch him with a soft smile on your lips.

“You look so cute today”, you say.

Jungkook stops chewing, sneaking a glance at you with big eyes and his cheeks puffy from all the food inside.

“Hehe”, he giggles with his mouth closed and crinkles his eyes up in a cute smile.

Then he continues chewing, looking left and right with big eyes.

“How was New York by the way?”

It is your turn to take a big bite and chew vigorously.

“Ignoring the fact that I missed you like crazy, it was alright. Mister Johnston isn’t as scary as I thought he’d be. Also the development of the television is going along nicely and the offices are set up too.”

“Yeah? That’s good. So the issue with the funds was solved?”

Jungkook nods his head, finishing his bite before he speaks.

“I felt like some gang boss when I came to their office cause I had like ten security guards with me and they all had guns, can you imagine that? I felt so cool.”

You chuckle.

“Wow so dangerous”, you tease.

Jungkook rolls his eyes and clicks his tongue.

“Whatever, you’re just being uncool. It was really cool, if you had been there you would agree.”

You reach out and pet his soft hair.

“You’re always cool Bunny”, you ruffle his bangs, “but how were your urges? Did you get them like you feared?”

“Just once when someone offered me a glass of wine. It was a really nice day and it would have fit with the mood, you know?”

You nod your head.

“But I said that I’m almost four months sober and I drank lemon soda instead.”

“That’s good. I’m so proud of you.”

“You are?” his eyes light up.

“You know I am.”

Jungkook lowers his bowl of japchae and tilts his head to the side. His eyes race over your features. He looks so fond.

“Why did I ever think that I will never get it?” he whispers.

“Get what?”

“A love so epic that I will be happy to wake up every day.”

“Jungkook…” you look into your food, “…don’t say that.”

“It’s the truth.”

“Gosh Bunny, just eat your food you silly noodle”, you murmur, ruffling his bangs with your cheeks burning up.

You stay cuddled up on the couch after finishing your meal, sharing a package of chocolate chip cookies and drinking milk. Jungkook has his eyes closed, listening to the faint sound of the thunderstorm, which had started twenty minutes ago. His fingers are running up and down your arm as his back is cuddled into your chest. He was your little spoon, feeling so small and safe in your embrace.

“I’m so happy”, he whispers.

“I’m happy too”, you whisper back.

“I’m so glad to be home again. I honestly missed those moments the most.”

“Yeah?” you grin, burying your nose in his soft hair, “I kinda agree.”

Jungkook sighs and rubs his body into yours slowly as he grows even more comfortable. It was perfect for him and it would have been perfect for you too if you didn’t have that lingering thought of your surprise in the back of your head.

“Jungkook?”

“Yes?”

“I need to piss.”

“Hm?” he turns his head, studying your features with sparkly eyes, “is it urgent?”

You nod your head vigorously, gnawing on your lower lip.

“Urgh fine”, he pouts, letting go of your arm, “I’m gonna die of hypothermia in the meantime.”

You snort, patting his butt softly.

“Dramatic baby.”

You hurry to the bathroom, taking a sharp turn to your right and disappearing into your dressing room instead. You didn’t need to piss, you just wanted an excuse to get the surprise you prepared for him. Oh you are so incredibly nervous that your hands are shaking as you pull it from your panties drawer. You look at it and take a deep breath.

“Okay let’s do this.”

Jungkook was sitting up on the couch, eating a cookie and drinking the rest of his milk with his hands hidden in the sleeves of his sweatshirt. He starts smiling when you come back, eyes falling on the small box in your hands in an instant.

“What’s that?”

“I lied. I didn’t need to piss. I actually prepared something for you.”

“You did?”

You sit down next to him.

“Yes, uhm… here.”

Jungkook accepts it and reads the label first.

“For spending time with my priority”, he pouts, looking at you with glassy eyes, “my love…”

You smile shyly, “open it.”

He opens it, furrowing his brows.

“Money?” he laughs, “why are you giving me money?”

You scoot closer, twisting the fabric of your sweatpants.

“Turn it around.”

Jungkook takes the stack out of the box and turns it.

“Last salary”, he reads, cocking his right eyebrow up, “I don’t understand”, he looks at you and the excited smile on your lips.

He looks back at the money and reads the words again.

“Last salary…last salary...mhhm…last – “, you can watch how everything is falling into place in his mind as his eyes widen before falling on your face, “no…”

You giggle, “yes”, nodding your head vigorously.

"My love…" he whimpers.

"I'm sorry I took so long to quit at this awful place. But I’m ready now, I’m ready for a better life with you. No more Paradis, just you and I and a better life."

"My love", Jungkook whispers, falling around your neck, "I’m so proud."

You laugh and wrap your arms around him.

He presses you closer until his scent is the only thing you can still take in.

"I’m so proud. I’m so fucking proud of you, my love."

You close your eyes and squeeze him even tighter to your body. And in return he squeezes you as well.

This is the type of hug you only really saw in movies and which you called so unrealistic that it was cringy. You called it dumb and said that no two humans would ever actually hug that tightly. You said that no two people could feel so much for one another that they felt the desire to press their body against the other in a weird position.

You realise that you were an idiot back then. A hug like that is possible and doing it with Jungkook feels incredible.

If you were in a movie right now the camera would turn around you and him right now to show every angle of the hug and then someone would sit in front of their screen and call it way too unrealistic and cringy.

But because you weren’t in a movie and this was real life there were no cameras turning off or movie directors telling you that the scene was done. There was just your perfect, goddamn addicting togetherness and the even more addicting feeling of his racing heart against your chest.

And it drew you closer, it drew you closer until you felt like you and him actually melted together and could hear his every gentle breath.

"I'm-" he begins.

"Shhh, don’t talk. Let's stay like this", you shush him.

He laughs quietly.

"Alright, if you say so."

And so you stayed like this for a very long time. You hugged in the silence of your living room underneath the warm ceiling lights and it felt right to do so. You hugged for so long that it made you realise that being touchstarved was never, ever worth it. All those lonely nights you forced yourself to have because you feared that letting in another person would end with your heartbreak, was nothing but the attempt of a stupid girl trying to be pretend that she didn’t need another person. It sounds like complete madness now that holding Jungkook feels like holding your person.

"I don't wanna let go", you whisper.

"Me neither", he whispers.

"I've never hugged someone for so long before."

"Me neither."

"I read somewhere that hugging someone for really long can bond them or something."

"You know I love your facts, but don’t ruin it now."

You laugh, "hey don’t attack my attempt at being less awkward."

"Why are you awkward?"

"Because I am mentally preparing a speech right now and it's making me nervous."

"A speech?"

"You're my person Jungkook."

He breaks away to stare at you in shock.

“You gave me back my happiness and my hope and made me feel alive again.”

You touch his face softly, for only a second just to refresh the memory of how it feels like in your palm.

"You make me like hugs and falling asleep next to another human and being vulnerable and stupid words like you're my person and you make me want to change something about myself for the sake of another without feeling regret and you make me want to work on myself and be better. And…"

You look into his eyes.

"...you make me want to commit to someone and, and. Ha", you laugh breathlessly, placing your hand over your heart, "and you make me want to scream I goddamn fucking love you on top of my lungs from a really high mountain so that the whole entire world knows about it. And in my equation of love I think that makes you my person."

First his lips start trembling then his brows knit then his eyes squeeze shut and then he is crying.

"Oh dear, hey. Uhm, don’t cry."

He makes you fall from how aggressively he hugs you. Your back hits the sofa, you laugh as Jungkook falls on top of you, burying his face in your neck.

"I love you so much, I love you so much, oh god I love you so much", he whispers and lets out a very - and we are talking very - ugly sob afterwards.

"God Kook", you laugh fondly, "breathe, you are going to choke otherwise."

Jungkook coughs and sobs, making you giggle.

“Gosh Bunny, you are so adorable.”

He allows you to raise his head and squish his heated cheeks. His face mirrors the sobs, destroyed and covered in snot and you think that he was the most beautiful man on earth at this moment.

"I love you too, silly noodle", you say and clean him with your fingers.

He whimpers and sobs at the same time all whilst trying his hardest to smile.

"Com'ere Bunny", you say and pull him back into your chest.

And Jungkook was melting into your embrace, thanking the universe for giving him the most epic lovestory of all the lovestories.

And you in return don’t feel like a weak, selfless anti-feminist idiot anymore, who gave in to love. You feel like a happy, actually happy, woman gladly holding her boyfriend because she likes doing it. And that was okay for you, it was more than okay for you, because you know that Jungkook feels the same.

You were his person after all.

603 notes · View notes

h0tchner · 3 years ago

Text

Any Age, Any Day, Anywhere (Part 1) - aaron hotchner x fem!reader

pairing: aaron hotchner x fem!reader

summary: WRITTEN FOR AN ANON REQUEST: "ok hi so u already wrote a jealous reader and was wondering whats your take on jealous hotch? i mostly see him in fics as possessive and yeah being the leader type i would think he could also be possessive but i also think that he would just be sad like ya know he doubts himself as we saw in some episodes and i think he would need assurance and a lot of convincing that u only love him but if you’ve given that to him then thats the time he would be possessive and god i would love to imagine a possessive and feral aaron hotchner"

word count: 3.5k

includes: kissing, so much freaking adorable fluff, talk of body insecurities, insecure!hotch, protective!hotch, wifey reader, super brief mentions of pregnancy, alcohol, confrontation with a drunk asshole (derek & hotch are all over it tho dw), party at papa rossi's!, smut to come in next chapter...

rating: 18+ (technically there is no smut in this part, but there are adult themes such as drinking, kissing, etc.).

a/n: HELLO BESTIES! This is part one of a two-part fic! The next part will be pure filth, so keep your eyes peeled for some feral hotch content... ALSO! PLS (!!!!!!!!!!!) interact if you liked this, rb, comment, like and/or send me a request if you have ideas for future fics! i love y’all! - rivka💞

“Aaron! Can you come here for a sec?” you call out to your husband from the bathroom, muttering curses under your breath as you try (and fail) for the third time to zip up the back of your black cocktail dress.

“Sure, I just need a minute,” he replies from the bedroom closet, securing the last opalescent button on the arm of his white dress shirt. He looks at himself in the closet mirror, zeroing in at the bags under his eyes and the sprinkling of grey in his stubble. He looks… tired. Tired and old. And he hates it.

Even though Aaron is only in his late-40s, he has lived lifetimes; years of working as Unit Chief of the BAU will do that to a man. Every horror he’s seen and every person he’s lost has weighed on his body and mind. In the past few months, amidst work changes and a new baby, he’s been exhausted and in fear that he’s letting himself go. Of course, being the stoic man that he is, he’s done his absolute best to hide these feelings from you. Tonight, however, he doesn’t know if he can. It’ll be your first night out together as a couple since welcoming baby girl Hotchner to the family four months ago. With no pressing family or work distractions, he just knows that you’ll be able to sense his apprehensions. It’s only a matter of when.

Taking in a breath, he turns a little to the side, frowning at his profile. Aaron winces a little at his “dad bod,” but quickly recovers from the discomfort, milliseconds after it flashes across his face.

“Aaron Hotchner get your handsome butt in here and help me zip my dress! We’re gonna be late,” you exclaim, trying one last time to reach the zipper before giving up and crossing your arms in defeat. You lean back lightly against the countertop facing the door, letting the fabric slip off your shoulders, and wait for your husband to rescue you from the hell that is this dress.

At the sound of your voice, Aaron snaps out of his trance. He shakes his head lightly, as if to physically erase the intrusive thoughts, and clears his throat. Grabbing his suit jacket off the hanger, he flicks off the closet light and closes the door behind him.

Languidly, he meanders from the closet toward the bathroom. He drags his feet a little longer than he normally would, still feeling off and a little bit shy about his appearance.

“Aaron,” you sing, “I’m waiting for –,” your jaw drops mid-sentence when Aaron appears in the doorway.

“Oh fuck,” you breathe out before you can stop yourself, eyes widening at the sight of the gorgeous man in front of you.

“What’s wrong?” He asks, crossing over to you, searching your face for any ounce of reprieve.

“Nothing, nothing’s wrong,” you’re quick to reply, standing from your leaning position to meet him, holding out your hands.

He takes them in his own, cocking his head slightly, his soft hazel eyes boring into yours.

You shift forward, moving up on your toes to peck his soft pink lips.

He sighs into the kiss, feeling the warmth of your lips against his own. It feels so good that it almost makes him forget about how he is feeling… almost. But the dark thoughts come back, and he pulls away from you a bit, reluctantly.

Aaron clears his throat.

“You called me?” He questions, but it sounds more like a fact.

“Yeah,” you give his hands a squeeze. “I needed you to zip up my dress, but now,” you lean in again, “I kinda want you to rip it off me.” You offer him a sultry smirk, moving your hands up to rest on his broad chest. He moves his hands to settle on your hips.

You lick your lips and let your eyes rake over his body, taking in every ounce of his sexy frame. The way his crisp, white dress shirt hugs his solid body makes you go weak in the knees. His strong, toned legs in those black dress pants? Yes please. His soft black hair and salt and pepper stubble on his face are practically begging to be touched. He looks good. Damn good.

“You look…” you pause, tapping a finger lightly against his pectoral, searching for the right word, “…delicious.”

Aaron blushes lightly at your ogling, offering you a sad smile as he squeezes his eyes shut out of embarrassment.

You sense the falter in his demeanor, knowing that there’s something else nagging at him far beyond his usual flustering when you vocalize your attraction to him.

“Honey,” you implore, looping your hands around his neck to bring his forehead down to touch yours. “What’s going on in that big, beautiful brain of yours?”

“It’s nothing,” he mutters, swallowing, rubbing soft circles into your sides.

“It’s something,” you counter, carding a hand through his hair at the nape of his neck. You scratch lightly at his scalp, waiting for him to speak. You’ve learned that the best thing to do when Aaron gets in a mood is to give him some time to gather his thoughts. Keeping him close, physically, is a way to show him some comfort without pressuring him to speak. It encourages him, without words, that your arms are a safe place.

“I don’t…” he starts, and then stops himself. His dark eyebrows furrow and his mouth presses into a thin line.

“Mhm?” you question, fingers still tangled in his thick, black locks.

He pulls his forehead away from yours and locks eyes with you. You let your hands be still now, a silent gesture to show him that you’re listening.

He takes in a breath.

“I don’t look the way I used to,” he says quietly, shifting his eyes away from yours.

“What do you mean,” you urge him to continue.

“I mean, I don’t look like I did five years ago. Two years ago. Four months ago. I mean, I was practically a different man when we first met. I was younger, fitter…” he trails off, visibly upset.

“Yes, Aaron, you were,” you agree, keeping your tone temperate.

His eyes snap to yours, confused. It’s clear that was not what he was expecting you to say.

“You were a different man,” you continue gently, resuming your pacifying touch in his hair, “and I was a different woman.”

Aaron lets out a huff.

“Do you love me any less now than you did five years ago?” You ask him.

“Of course not,” he’s quick to answer.

“Why is that?” You prod.

“You’re gorgeous, inside and out. You’re funny, smart, loving…” he begins, but you interrupt him before he can go on.

“And,” you butt in, “if I were to go completely grey, gain thirty pounds, and only wear a potato sack to work every day would you love me any less?”

Aaron huffs again, but this time he’s fighting a smile. He’s starting to catch on. You watch as a spark of levity returns to his eyes. He holds you a little tighter.

“No. There’s nothing you could do or say to make me love you any less,” he grumbles in annoyance, but his upturned lip and matching eyebrow tell a different story.

“Ditto, baby,” you smile up at him. “I love you at any age, any day, anywhere, and there is nothing in the world that can make me change my mind.”

He dips down then, capturing you in a kiss, grinning against your lips.

You giggle as Aaron works his way down your jawline and neck, gasping as he kisses the soft skin at the junction of your neck and shoulder, thick fingers gripping the sides of your hips. He moves his lips back up to your earlobe, nipping at it lightly as you let out another soft gasp.

“You always know the right thing to say,” he whispers into your ear, pressing another kiss right underneath it.

“Aaron, I know I said I wanted you to take this dress off me,” you say breathlessly as Aaron nips at your shoulder again, “but Rossi will kill us if we don’t show up tonight. Plus, I really want the chance to show off my super sexy FBI husband. It’s been far too long.”

He lets out a low groan into your skin and gives your hips a squeeze, nuzzling his head into your neck.

“Yeah,” he mumbles, “you’re right.”

“Aren’t I always,” you snort, eliciting a chuckle from your husband as you turn around in his arms to let him zip you up.

He takes his time, letting his fingers brush lightly over your spine as he draws the zipper over your back. When he’s done and the clasp is latched, he kisses one shoulder lightly, and then the other.

“Thank you,” you whisper, leaning back against his warm body.

“No, honey,” he kisses the top of your head, “thank you.”

_____________________________________________________________

By the time you and Aaron arrive at Rossi’s mansion, the party is already in full swing. Judging by the number of cars in the makeshift parking lot on his spacious front lawn, there must be at least fifty, maybe even a hundred people here.

Despite the bustle of the evening, it doesn’t take long for you two to find Emily, Penelope, and Derek in the living room, drinks in hand, snacking on some very expensive looking food.

“Hey, look! It’s the Hotchners!” Emily cheers, teetering on the arm of the leather couch, wine glass in hand.

“Hello beautiful BAU power-couple!” Penelope chimes in from the seat next to her, cuddled up into Derek’s side.

You laugh and let go of Aaron’s hand, walking over to greet your friends.

“Hey hot stuff, look at you, look at you!” Derek chimes in, eyeing you up and down before standing to shake Aaron’s hand.

“Oh, please,” you roll your eyes at him as you give Emily a big hug.

“And you don’t look bad yourself, boss man!” Derek adds.

You shoot your husband an ‘I told you so’ look over your shoulder, before untangling your arms from Emily and giving Penelope an equally enthusiastic squeeze.

“It’s good to see you all,” Aaron smiles lightly, all dimples in the low light. He steps in to give Emily and Penelope soft hugs.

“Let’s go get you a drink,” Derek says to Aaron, clapping him on the back.

“White?” Aaron looks to you, even though he already knows the answer.

“Yes please,” you respond, “thank you.”

“Be back soon,” he smiles easily, kissing your cheek, making your heart ache.

Aaron and Derek turn and exit the room together.

Penelope drunkenly pats the seat next to her, and you plop down on the couch.

“We’ve missed you like this!” Emily exclaims, gesturing between the three of you and around the room. “I can’t believe we’ve had to wait nine whole months plusanother four just to have a drink with our best friend again.”

You laugh at her, tilting your head back lightly. “Well, you guys got a beautiful little niece out of it, doesn’t that make up for all the wild girl’s nights I missed?”

Emily sighs, dramatically, “I guess so,” she jests.

“Oh, for sure.” Penelope adds. “You look freaking gorgeous, by the way. I mean, I would have never guessed you were creating a tiny human in that body only a few months ago!”

You blush lightly at her words, “You flatter me far too much, Pen. I owe this,” you gesture down at your figure, “all to Spanx!”

“Amen!” Emily toasts. You raise an imaginary glass to theirs and pretend to clink, taking a swig of invisible liquid.

“Are J.J. and Will here?” You ask them after they’ve had a few more sips of their wine.

“Yeah, yeah,” Emily nods, “they’re around somewhere.”

You take a moment and look around the room, taking in all the sights and the sounds of the party. You see some faces you recognize from around the bureau, but others you don’t. Just as you’re about to turn back to your friends, someone catches your eye. One face stands out from the crowd: he’s a young, suave-looking man in a sharp navy suit. Sandy hair perfectly gelled, shiny brown loafers, and bright blue eyes looking right at you. In another life you would have been exhilarated by his attention, apparent charm, and good looks, but now? Now, you’re married to the love of your life with an amazing stepson and a wonderful baby girl. His wolfish gaze means absolutely nothing to you. You simply flash him a curt smile and turn back to Emily and Penelope without a second thought.

You and your friends resume your chatter, waiting for the men to return with more drinks... only they don’t. Perhaps its “new mother anxiety” talking, but the longer your husband is gone, the more you start to grow concerned. A few more minutes pass of antics, laughter, and catching up until the nagging voice in the back of your head turns into an all-out scream. All you know is that you’re suddenly feeling very overwhelmed need to be with Aaron. So, you announce to your friends that you’re going to hunt down Derek and your husband.

You stand from the couch and smooth out the skirt of your dress with the promise to be back in a few minutes.

You walk out of the living room and into the grand foyer, following the same route as Aaron had earlier. Your black kitten heels click on the marble flooring, the skirt of your dress swishing lightly as you walk with purpose towards the kitchen. You’re so concentrated on reaching your destination that you don’t realize the man who had been watching you in the living room was now hot at your heels, following you through the house. It’s only when a hand reaches out and jerks your arm backward that you stop, startled, just past the grand staircase, turning face to face with him.

“You’re not an easy woman to get alone,” he smirks, reeking of alcohol, still gripping your arm, tight. Up close he is decidedly not as handsome as the low light of the living room made him seem. In fact, he seems… creepy. Really, really, really, creepy.

“Can I help you?” You blink at him, pulling your arm out of his vice grip.

“You sure can, baby,” he steps closer to you, voice oozing with sleaze. You gag at the liquor on his breath.

Moving away, you scowl at him, crossing your arms across your chest.

“What’s say you and I head upstairs for a little while? I’m dying to get my hands on your body.” He jerks his head toward the staircase, reaching out to grab your arm again.

You’re fuming at this point, ready give him a piece of your mind when a stern voice beats you to it.

“Excuse me, what do you think you’re doing?” Aaron articulates, approaching you both with Derek not far behind.

You breathe a sigh of relief as your husband glares at the drunken man vengefully, coming to stand by your side. Aaron pulls you into him, roughly, hand tight around your waist. The anger radiating off your husband is equally terrifying and HOT.

“Take a walk, man,” Derek adds in, coming to stand next to the drunken asshole. The man looks from you, to Aaron, then over to Derek, and finally back at you.

“Whatever,” the man grumbles, putting his hands up, “she’s not worth it anyway. Not pretty enough for the hassle. I just thought she looked like an easy lay.”

“That’s enough,” Aaron snaps, seething. “Leave now, before I make you,” your husband growls. He angles his body forward so you’re slightly behind him. A shiver passes through you at his fierce protectiveness.

“Fine, I’m going to get another drink,” the man utters.

“No,” Aaron interjects, “the party. Leave the party or I’ll have you removed.”

“What’s your problem?” The creepy man retorts, this time, more confrontationally.

“My problem?” Aaron says, angrily. You feel his entire body tense at the accusation.

“Hotch,” Derek warns, “I’ll take care of it. You guys go enjoy yourselves. Forget about him.”

“Come on, Aaron,” you tug on his suit jacket lightly, eyes pleading… but Aaron doesn’t budge from his spot. He only holds you tighter as he continues to stare down the man as Derek ushers him away and towards the front door. He doesn’t falter until they are out of sight.

“Aaron?” You repeat.

He looks down at you, finally, blinking away the fury until all that’s left is an all-consuming love. He releases you from his protective hold, and you face him.

“I’m okay,” you assure him in earnest, letting out a shaky breath.

“Honey, I’m so sorry,” he breathes, bringing his hands up to cup your face.

“Aaron, it’s okay, really,” you bite your lip, shifting your eyes away from his.

“You’re so beautiful,” Aaron kisses your forehead, and then the top of your head. “So, so beautiful, and I’m so sorry.”

“Aaron, can we just go home?” You ask.

“Sure,” he kisses your head one last time before weaving his fingers between yours and guiding you gently toward the back exit.

_____________________________________________________________

The car ride home is quiet. The only sounds are the occasional click of the turn signal, and the hum of the wheels on the road. Aaron is still upset, and so are you, but you’re also… something else. Something you can’t quite put your finger on. You feel guilty for ruining the evening, guilty that you FEEL guilty for something you had no control over, hungry, tired, and… horny? Oh, and guilty for feeling horny.

It isn’t helping that one of Aaron’s hands is planted firmly on your thigh. He lifts it only to adjust the air conditioning or to scratch his nose, but otherwise it remains on you the whole way home. When he pulls into the driveway of your shared house, and shuts the car off, he still doesn’t move it.

“Honey?” You turn your head to look at him. His eyes are closed. You take in the strong features of his profile, noting the prominence of his nose and the way his eyelashes rest on his high cheekbones.

“I almost punched him.” Aaron whispers, opening his eyes to look over at you sheepishly.

“You what,” you exhale, mouth slightly agape.

“That guy,” he continues, bringing his left hand up to pinch his nose. “I almost punched him for saying that about you.”

You snort, amused by his confession.

Your husband lets out a short laugh, squeezing your thigh as he does.

“I would’ve liked to see that.” You’re grinning now and so is he.

He flashes his eyes at you and laughs again, this time less anxiously. You join him, feeling the tension dissipate with every passing moment.

“My big, bad FBI man decking a barely-legal drunk dickhead for making a move on his wife? Where can I get my tickets?” You joke.

As you say the words “his wife,” Aaron’s breath hitches in his throat. His hand on your thigh presses down instinctively. Neither of his reactions go unnoticed.

You lay a hand over his where it rests on your leg.

“You know, Aaron,” you begin.

He looks over at you, jaw tight, but this time it isn’t from anger.

“This is the first time we’ve had the house all to ourselves in months,” you pull his hand off you and bring it up to your lips. You press a kiss to his palm, and then to his wrist.

“This… is true,” he breathes out, studying you, taking you in.

“So, I’m just wondering:” you grin, linking your fingers with his, “are you going to carry your wife into our house, Aaron? Or do I have to walk myself?”

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tendouluvr · 4 years ago

Text

not telling them you’re pregnant [2] - f!reader

- little angst, hurt/comfort??, fluff

- characters: iwaizumi, atsumu, kageyama

- warnings: pregnancy, cravings, morning sickness aka throwing up, some cursing, mentions of sex, “mad” iwa makes out with your neck, atsumu pretends to faint and reader jokes about him dying :0

- wc: 1.4k, 1.3k, 1.7k (jfc thats a lot)

a/n: thank u guys for all the love on the first part <333 ily all and ty to the nonnie that requested tsumu and kags

f!reader cuz pregnancy but no specific prns/gendered terms used

[1. suna, sakusa, semi]

IWAIZUMI

#! you were planning on telling iwaizumi the big news that night

#! you missed your cycle this month, thinking it was probably just late so you didn’t care and waited for one more week to pass before worrying

#! it was almost two weeks now, your period tracker repeatedly sending you notifications to remind you to log your monthly cycle

#! but you had no cycle to log

#! thinking that you should go buy some tests, you did just that and came home to see them all turn positive

#! you were in the kitchen cooking a quick dinner when iwaizumi came home

#! he entered your home mumbling under his breath about some kid while putting up his jacket and shoes

#! “welcome home, haji!” you greeted him from the kitchen

#! “hey.” he briefly said back making you turn around to look at him

#! “you alright? what happened?” you tried starting a conversation in hopes of getting his mind off of whatever it is that seems to be bothering him

#! “some fucking kids came into the gym today, acting all obnoxious, trying to taunt me and the team because they wanted to impress some girls who probably didn’t even know them. would’ve knocked them out if it wasn’t against the fucking law.” he harshly explained his day while looking through the fridge for his protein drink

#! you tried not to laugh, turning around so he couldn’t see your face and tightening your lips together to contain yourself, but it was so funny you couldn’t help but imagine it

#! iwaizumi heard the giggles coming from you causing him to roll his eyes, “what’s funny?”

#! “nothing, should’ve just knocked them out, babe.”

#! “yea? sounds like you want to start visiting me in jail,” he makes his way over to back hug you while you continued cooking at the stove, “well then, i’ll keep that in mind next time some dinky teenager get in my face, baby.” he mumbles against your neck before giving you a quick kiss there

#! “hajjj, i’m cooking. go be horny elsewhere!” your upper half shuddered when he continued making out with your neck

#! “whatever you say, your highness.” deep chuckles come from him while he lets go of you to walk to the bedroom

#! “don’t call me that!” his laugh getting louder at your exclamation

#! later that night, you both laid in bed on your sides staring out of the window in front of you

#! “hey haj,” your voice a gentle whisper as to not wake him up if he had already fell asleep

#! “hmm?” he hums from behind you, rough, warm hands under your shirt rubbing itself on your bare stomach

#! “do you ever want kids?”

#! he was silent as he thought about what to say to you

#! “i don’t if they’re just gonna turn out like those dicks from today.” his answer wasn’t meant to be taken too seriously, he just hoped you didn’t interpret that as him saying he doesn’t want kids at all

#! “so if they don’t?”

#! “.......sure.”

#! you noticed his hesitation before he gave you an answer, trying to ignore it so your brain didn’t start analyzing too much

#! “hm, ok. goodnight, haji.”

#! “goodnight, i love you.”

#! “love you too.”

#! you told yourself that you were gonna reveal the news to him that night, but seeing that he was worked up over those kids and his slight hesitation when he answered you made you change your mind at the last minute

#! you laid awake thinking about what to do while iwaizumi peacefully slept not knowing his hand was caressing his future child

#! a few days have passed and you were still thinking about when to tell him

#! should you just say it? how would you say it? “hey, i’m pregnant.” no, that’s too blunt. “what if i told you i’m pregnant?” eh. “i’m preggo!” maybe.

#! you both never brought up the topic about having kids again ever since that night

#! but what you didn’t know was how occupied iwaizumi’s mind has been ever since you popped that question

#! he’s been imagining what it would be like to have a little him running around the house, maybe he’s a crybaby and dramatic like his uncle oikawa — who definitely would like to be the godfather, and he promises daily facetime calls everyday despite iwaizumi’s obvious displeasure — or perhaps he also finds entertainment in the godzilla franchise like his father

#! iwa thinks it would be neat to sometimes watch godzilla with someone else besides you, preferably his own kid

#! the night you asked him that question, it took him a while to answer because he couldn’t believe what he just heard. getting lost in his thoughts, he didn’t realize he forgot to answer you, giving you a quick, “sure.” once he came back to reality

#! you didn’t know this so you took his moment of silence as a sign of hesitation

#! the minor miscommunication causing you both to go into your own heads

#! you were currently looking in the full body mirror, observing the way your stomach looked and how much it’ll be changing soon to accommodate a living being inside you. your hands were moving around, curving itself against your stomach naturally when iwaizumi walked in on you

#! “babe, have you seen my hoodie? the black one, i think you were wearing it-,” his sentence cut off when he looked up from his phone

#! “what are you doing?” he asked seeing you pull your shirt back down

#! “looking at my stomach.”

#! “why? are you okay?” his voice softened at the second question wondering if you were feeling bad about yourself

#! “uh no, wait- yes, yea i’m okay. um, can i tell you something?”

#! before he could answer, you continued, “well, by tell i mean show. i have something to show you.”

#! “uh, yes? why are you so nervous?”

#! “ok, wait here.”

#! “babe-,” and you ran off leaving iwaizumi and the rest of his sentence in the room. a few seconds later, you came back holding something in your hand

#! “here.” grabbing his thick fingers to open his palm before stuffing the item into it. his eyebrows furrowed and he slowly unravels the piece of paper. you analyzed his face for any signs of anger or discontent while his eyes scanned the pictures from one corner to another

#! “w-what is..... you’re pregnant?” he whispered out, mind and body in shock as he stares at you wide-eyed

#! you nodded knowing that if you opened your mouth to talk you were probably going to cry. he falls onto the bed, sitting at the edge, then buries his head into his hands

#! “haji?” your voice lower than a whisper

#! he didn’t answer

#! but you saw it

#! you saw his shoulders starting to shake

#! “haj?” you tried again, this time lightly walking towards him

#! his cries became audible when he felt your smaller hands wrapping around his shoulders

#! “hey.. why are you crying?” you tried comforting him because it didn’t seem like his tears were going to stop any time soon

#! “shit, yn, fuck me.” he said through his cries

#! “oh?”

#! he rolled his eyes at your implying tone before grabbing you by the waist to lay his head on your chest. his breath staggered from crying, he was still crying just not as hard

#! one of your hand gently going through his hair while the other one rubs his back. the action soothing him enough to calm him down and eventually his tears stopped. “why didn’t you tell me?” his voice pouty and his sentence breaking between every other word

#! “i thought you didn’t want kids. i was scared.”

#! he raises his head so his chin is now resting on your chest, “why’d you think that?”

#! “you.. hesitated... when i asked you, remember?”

#! his eyes drifting to the side as he tries to think back on the last few days. you knew he remembered when his eyes slightly widened and his lips formed a small o, “i’m sorry, the question made me imagine things and i got lost in my train of thoughts that i forgot to answer you right away.”

#! “oh.”

#! “yea..”

#! “then, i’m sorry for assuming things and not telling you.”

#! “no, it’s not your fault.”

#! “it’s not yours either.”

#! “so.. truce?”

#! “idiot! why are we making a truce?!”

#! he giggles as he stuffs his face back into your chest but not before he bent down to give your stomach a loving kiss

ATSUMU

#! atsumu was huffing with his arms crossed across his chest, lip in a pout and eyes squinted as he focuses on the television in front of him

#! “stupid ‘samu and his stupid food. i don’t need it. if he doesn’t want to give me any, then i don’t need it. i can make my own food. stupid. stupid, stupid, stupid.” he childishly mumbled under his breath as his eyes squinted even more, shooting his glare directly at the television

#! “‘tsumu, can you come help me with this?” a voice called from the bedroom. your voice. his beautiful, lovely, awesome sweetheart

#! “c’ming.” he mumbles, slowly sliding off of the couch to trudge over to you

#! “hmm?” he hummed when he got to the entryway of your shared bedroom

#! “can you hold this up a bit, i need to get something in here.” you were in the walk-in closet organizing some things

#! he was happy to help, but you could tell from the way he was pouting and his eyebrows still furrowed that something was bothering him

#! you sighed, “what’s wrong?”

#! “nothin’.”

#! “‘tsumu....,” you gave him a knowing look

#! he was gonna have to tell you at some point, “‘samu, that food hogging pig!”

#! “oh, hey! don’t call him that! it’s mean.”

#! “dun care, his fault for not sharing. our mom taught us better than that.”

#! “you don’t share, get off his back.”

#! “i do!! why are ya siding with him?! i’m yer boyfriend! yer sweet, loving, ethereal boyfriend!”

#! you raised an eyebrow at the way he described himself, “y’sure ‘bout that?”

#! his mouth opens as if he was going to gasp but no sound came out, he just pretended to faint

#! “oh no, did you die?”

#! no answer

#! “about time, thought i was gonna have to endure it for a few more years.”

#! “hey!!” he bounced back up when he heard you say that ridiculously offensive comment

#! “fine, i’ll leave then. don’t come running back to me when ya miss yer oh so handsome future husband.”

#! you snorted before going back to organizing the closet, “hold this for me, please.”

#! he groaned from the back of his throat but went over to help you anyway

#! recently, the twins’ mom gave you guys some boxes of clothes she had put away for some time. not wanting to throw them away, she gave it to you guys and osamu to take whatever you could

#! while looking through the boxes, you dug up some baby clothes that belonged to atsumu

#! “oh my god.”

#! he swings his head over to look at you, “what? hey! that’s mine!”

#! “it’s so ugly.”

#! “i’m telling my mom you said that. she’s gonna hate you sooooo much.”

#! “‘tsum, she set you up.”

#! he faked a wail and then turned back around to ignore you

#! “y’think we can keep some?”

#! “what for?”

#! “i don’t know..what if we have kids later?”

#! “that sounds nice...but we might have twins. i don’t want that.”

#! “huh? you can’t control who and how many we get, ‘tsumu.”

#! “then, let’s not risk it!”

#! “so, you don’t want kids?”

#! “precisely, yah.”

#! you stared incredulously at him while he continued sorting through stuff like he didn’t just tell you he made up his mind on not wanting kids

#! you found out two days ago that you’re pregnant, not yet telling atsumu because you just couldn’t find the right time to sit him down and talk

#! you didn’t expect to find out now that he for sure didn’t want kids. you guys talked about it a few times throughout the years of being together, but he never gave a definite answer

#! it was usually just him teasing you, or he was running around the answer. you never pushed him to answer, you didn’t want to pressure him or anything of that sort

#! “good to know, i’ll keep that in mind.” you mumbled, distracting yourself with folding the clothes

#! atsumu gave you a hum to acknowledge your words. no one says anything after that

#! a few days passed and the topic wasn’t brought up again. you secretly stashed some of the baby clothes while cleaning, the baby was gonna come at some point whether atsumu wanted it or not

#! but what you didn’t know was that he kept a stash of the baby clothes as well. he cleared out a space in his sock drawers by stuffing everything to one side, placing a stack of clothes inside because deep down he knew that there was going to be a mini him one day

#! it was currently morning, you both having the day off so you slept in. your back was curved to mold against his well defined chest while you slept. atsumu was snoring but you learned to block it out over time (he claimed you snore as well, but was never successful on proving it)

#! your eyes shot open, feeling the familiar bile crawling up your throat threatening to come out without your permission

#! quickly throwing the arm that was wrapped around you off, you ran towards the connected bathroom

#! your disappearance making atsumu’s sleepy eyes blink open, “babe? it’s still early.” his rough morning voice whispering out because it wasn’t capable of being louder than that in the morning

#! he heard the gagging noises from the restroom, eyes shooting wide awake in concern. he trips over the comforter trying to get out of bed, hurriedly running to you

#! atsumu acted fast and was holding your hair back, warm palms rubbing circles on your back. he wasn’t sure what to say, choosing to stay silent until you were finished

#! you wiped your mouth with the back of your palm, gasping for air over the toilet seat, reaching out to hold the hand that was on your back, you whispered out an, “i’m pregnant.”

#! initially he didn’t hear you, but once he heard it in his head he gasped. “how long?”

#! “not sure, almost a month?” your voice rough from throwing up

#! atsumu was confused. eyes darting everywhere, not really sure where to exactly focus on. his mind was racing, trying to think of why he didn’t know anything for so long, “ya didn’t tell me?”

#! “how could i when you said you don’t want kids?”

#! “i’m...oh..sorry, i’m sorry, i didn’t mean for it to be taken too seriously. i only said that because of the thing with ‘samu so i thought ya could tell it was a joke.”

#! “no ‘tsumu, i couldn’t. i was already pregnant at that point and hearing you say that about having kids really affected me. i didn’t know how to tell you after you specifically said to not risk anything, how was i suppose to know it was meant to be a joke?” your voice still groggy and tears were building up in your eyes.

#! he lightly sighs then brings his hand up to cup your head, rubbing it to calm you down. “i’m so sorry, angel. i do want kids, specifically with ya. what i said was a bit dicky, but i was just being immature, i promise. i won’t joke about serious things like that again, i’m sorry.”

#! you sniffed and brought his hand up to kiss him on the palm, but he quickly yanked it away making you look up at him in shock. “ya just threw up.” he pointed to the toilet.

#! you laughed at that and quickly apologized, he carried you up so you both can stand up from the bathroom floor. atsumu gently washing your hands and around your mouth, then you swishing some water in your mouth to get rid of the throw up aftertaste

#! “wanna know a secret, babe?” he blurted out while helping you walk back to the bed

#! “what?”

#! “i kept some of the baby clothes.” a shy smile on his face as he winks at you from the side

KAGEYAMA

#! you’ve been feeling a bit sluggish lately, you weren’t sure why because it came out of nowhere

#! you decided to ignore it, but as time passes, you didn’t get any better and you even started to throw up

#! thinking back to the talk your mom gave you when you were 10, you went out to buy some pregnancy tests

#! the timeline made sense, the last time you both had sex was a few weeks ago

#! kageyama’s been caught up with practice, you were stressed, so naturally you both thought it was a good idea to let it out

#! but what you didn’t expect was having to buy pregnancy tests because there was a possibility you’re pregnant

#! granted there wasn’t any protection used and you stopped taking your pills a while ago because you guys just didn’t care anymore, so nevermind, you do see how you could be pregnant

#! but damn, one time. all it took was one time

#! shaking your head, you took your phone out to text kageyama

#! you’re not telling him over text, just letting him know you have something to tell him tonight so he can know to prepare for a talk

#! you: tobiii

#! you: i have something to tell you

#! you: tonight tho

#! you: after you come home

#! him: ok love

#! while waiting for him to come home, you lazed around and scrolled through social media for a bit. checking twitter, you were reading some tweets from kageyama’s fans, finding some funny, some adorable, and some just...weird

#! but one tweet you saw was from someone who had met kageyama at one of his previous games. the person was talking about their experience getting to meet him and they even wrote out a part of the conversation they had with kageyama

#! kageyama’s gf (real) @K4G3B10 tweeted: omfg i just met kageyama fucking tobiiosdfjdf

#! it was a thread so you clicked on it to continue reading

#! kageyama’s gf (real) @K4G3B10 tweeted: he’s so sighs dreamily

#! kageyama’s gf (real) @K4G3B10 tweeted: so fucking tall. i’m 5′3 and mans all the way up there 👆

#! kageyama’s gf (real) @K4G3B10 tweeted: OH OMH wait lemme type out one part of our convo omfg i think he has a partner?????? like an actual s/o guys not me

#! kageyama’s gf (real) @K4G3B10 tweeted: ok i asked him smtg along the lines of what he thought abt having so many fans who are children ykk bc i was thinking he knew i was implying that these kids look up to him and stuff

#! kageyama’s gf (real) @K4G3B10 tweeted: but this man.....is so...UNAWARE why is he like this but he said smtg like he doesnt understand how kids can be fans of him bc how can they understand professional volleyball like that and i was like ???mf didn’t u grow up playing vball

#! kageyama’s gf (real) @K4G3B10 tweeted: so i was like oh ok :D and then asked him abt his thoughts on his future kids following in his footsteps bc i was thinking his answer would be wholesome or some shit

#! kageyama’s gf (real) @K4G3B10 tweeted: he told me,,,,, i dont have kids and i dont want any... !!!! why does mr kagman not want kids w me :(( /j

#! kageyama’s gf (real) @K4G3B10 tweeted: ok so like all of this happened v quickly i was like in and out in 10 seconds lmao but WAIT after he said he doesnt want kids i saw him scrunching his face up

#! kageyama’s gf (real) @K4G3B10 tweeted: im not mind reader nor body language reader but idk he looked .. hrm sad?? FUCK IDK DONT TAKE M E SERIOUSLY IM DELUSIONAL

#! being an adult, you knew you shouldn’t be taking twitter threads of his teenage fans too seriously but you couldn’t help but reread the part where he said he didn’t want kids

#! did he actually say that or is this person rewording what he said? you now realized how you guys never really talked about having kids

#! sure, it was brought up once or twice but it was just because you were having baby fever. kageyama himself never directly told you he wanted kids or he was fine with having kids of his own

#! you sighed to yourself as you lock your phone, closing your eyes to take a nap until kageyama comes home

#! you felt yourself being shaken awake lightly, a familiar presence hovering over you on the couch made you open an eye

#! “tobio?”

#! “who else would it be?”

#! “i don’t know, a murderer?”

#! he scoffs at the slim chance of a someone breaking in to hurt you, but quickly turned his attention back to you when he remembered you wanted to talk

#! “so what’d you wanted to tell me?”

#! “oh, can you sit down?”

#! “o..kay?” he stiffly walked to sit beside you on the couch

#! “i’m uh,” think of something, “honestly, i forgot. yea, i forgot what i was gonna tell you. sorry.”

#! he raises one eyebrow to gaze at you curiously

#! “are you sure? it sounded important when you texted me.”

#! “mhm! yup, i forgot. sorry if i worried you, heh, are you hungry? there’s leftovers we can heat up.” you quickly tried to change the subject, getting up to walk to the kitchen

#! luckily your boyfriend didn’t question it further and got up to trail right behind you

#! you figured giving yourself some time before telling him after what you read was a good idea

#! are you aware that you were overthinking some tweet by a stranger on the app that is twitter? yes, you were. but you’re also human and overthinking is in human’s nature

#! it’s been three weeks and you still haven’t told kageyama the news. a part of you was ready to tell him, just let him know and you guys talk it out, what’s the worst that could happen

#! but the other part of you was scared. scared he actually didn’t want kids. scared he was going to leave you because going through with the pregnancy would drag him down. scared he would get mad at you for not being more careful when he was equally at fault

#! you know how kageyama gets when his emotions get complicated, he can’t deal with it so his one outlet is anger

#! he has no filter and says whatever comes to mind, all logical thinking leaving his brain

#! and that part of you is the stronger one

#! obviously you were going to tell him at some point, it’s not like you can literally hide the growing baby inside you

#! just not yet, not until you’re ready

#! you’re currently a little over a month, bump not really showing, but it’s there and it’s growing

#! kageyama can be a bit dim when it comes to.. most things beside volleyball, and usually you tease him about it but for once you thank whatever god is out there that he hasn’t noticed any big changes on your body yet

#! that was until you were showering, and he made the decision to enter the shower with you without your knowledge

#! humming to yourself while scrubbing your arms, you scooted back away from the water so it wouldn’t wash off the body wash you were trying to use

#! the action causing you to lightly hit kageyama’s chest making you jump from where you were standing

#! “tobio!” you screamed, turning around to throw the foamed body wash at him

#! he chuckles at your surprised expression and didn’t mind the soap you threw onto him, which was now sticking to his defined chest

#! “why were you just standing there, creep?”

#! he was still giggling when he answered you, “did i scare you this time?”

#! “what do you think?” you lightheartedly roll your eyes before going back to scrubbing your body

#! he picked the loofah out of your hand to continue for you

#! you both enjoyed the relaxing sound of running water and quiet echoed hums as he takes his time washing you when he suddenly stopped

#! opening your eyes, you looked up at him, “what’s wrong?”

#! he was just staring at you, blinking very slowly

#! “why do you look- your stomach feels- you look very-,” he sighs, “you look pregnant.”

#! now it was your turn to blink at him

#! you totally forgot that you were naked at the moment and he could easily see every inch of your body

#! blinking once more, you took a deep breath before telling him, “that’s ‘cuz i am.”

#! “y-you are?!” he jumped from his spot

#! “yea.. do you have a problem with that?”

#! “i...why didn’t you tell me?”

#! “do you have a problem with that?” you repeated

#! “n-no..so why didn’t you tell me?”

#! “you’re not mad?”

#! “why would i...?” his voice slightly turning high pitched as he dragged the i out

#! “i thought you didn’t want kids.”

#! “who told you that? when did i say that?”

#! “twitter.” you murmured under your breath

#! “what?”

#! “twitter..” you said a bit louder, still murmuring and choosing to turn away from him

#! “twitter?! why didn’t you just tell me, your real life boyfriend?”

#! “because!.... i was scared.”

#! “s-scared? baby, why?”

#! “i was scared you were going to leave. i don’t want you to leave. that night i told you i had something to tell you, that was when i found out. i backed out when you came home and i’m sorry. i should’ve just told you, i’m sorry, tobio-,” you were crying at this point, both of you standing under the water

#! “shh, shh, it’s okay. i’m sorry for not noticing earlier. you’re alright, babe. it’s okay. it’s okay to not feel ready, you don’t have to feel pressured to tell me anything, alright? whenever you’re ready, you tell me,” you meekly nodded as he pulls you into a hug, “whenever you’re ready..”

#! you both stood hugging each other’s bare body for a few minutes under the warm water

#! “that was probably the smartest thing you’ve ever said, tobi.” your voice sounding congested from the crying

#! “hey. mean.”

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cafedanslanuit · 4 years ago

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chapter guide | prev. chapter | next chapter

♣ — summary: when you told armin to pick up eren’s call while he was fucking you, you weren’t expecting things to escalate this quickly. not that you were complaining.

♣ — pairings: armin x reader, eren x reader, armin x reader x eren

♣ — chapter tags/warnings: oral sex (receiving), spanking, humiliation, degradation, semi-public, degradation kink, rough sex, mirror sex, alcohol and drugs.

♣ — a/n: thank you so much for all the love you’ve been giving this story so far! it makes me so happy you are all enjoying it so far. when i finished this chapter i realized the influence of halsey’s ‘strange love’ had lmao so if you have a chance, check it out. also this is a eren centric chapter while the next one will be centered around armin c:

chapter four: the bathroom sink

“Are you sure you don’t want to go? Last chance.”

Armin nodded, a soft smile on his lips. You were sitting on his bed, wearing a tiny black dress and high heels. You crossed your arms and legs, a small frown on your face.

“I’m sure. You’ve been wanting to go to Pieck’s party for a long time so you should go,” he said. “I just have too much work. I- my planning skills failed me,” Armin laughed softly.

“Can’t you do them when we get back? It’s the first party we’re attending with Eren. You know since…” you made a funny face, making you both laugh. “It was supposed to be fun for the three of us.”

Your boyfriend walked from his desk to his bed and cupped your face tenderly, thumb brushing against your pouting lip.

“Have fun for me,” he said, your frown deepening. “You look really, really beautiful, though.”

“How beautiful?” you teased him, leaning your head against his palm.

“Enough that I’m having a hard time telling you to go instead of staying here with me,” Armin replied, leaning in and pressing a kiss on the tip of your nose.

“Fine,” you sighed, rolling your eyes.

“C’mon. Tomorrow morning I submit my last paper and we can have lunch and then watch some movies together,” he offered.

“Promise?”

“Promise,” he smiled. You grinned and grabbed his face, placing a lot of small, chaste kisses on his lips, loving the way he giggled at your action. “Go have fun, I promise I’ll come with you to the next one.”

“Not the same without you though,” you reminded him, pulling away and lacing your pinky fingers together.

“Yeah, but Eren’s going, right? You can have fun with him.”

Your eyes immediately shot up at him. “Fun?”

“You know, uh- fun ,” he shrugged, a light blush covering his cheeks as he put his hands inside his pockets. It took you a couple of seconds to understand what he was implying.

“ Oh , okay,” you said, nodding your head softly. “Are you okay with that?”

“Yeah, I mean it’s him, so,” Armin shrugged. You nodded and took his hand to your mouth, placing a kiss on his knuckles. “Still gonna miss you, though.”

Armin smiled, pulling you closer for one last kiss before you left his dorm.

• • •

Pieck’s parties were always a huge success. She only used to throw them twice a year and maybe that’s why they were so special. Everyone sent some money to her and she would make sure to buy enough alcohol and weed to keep everyone satisfied the rest of the night. A part of you thought it was almost impossible everyone’s donations could cover everything but Pieck always seemed more than pleased to put some of her own money for the party.

You had been friends with Pieck for quite some time now, hence why she let you bring some of your friends to the party. Last year you had brought Jean and Armin with you, which led to Jean and Pieck to start dating. You liked how good they looked with each other and that Jean had finally closed the Mikasa chapter and was trying something new. Pieck always seemed calm and collected, loving to nuzzle on Jean’s chest whenever they sat together. Nevertheless, you had also seen her break up a fight with her bare hands between two guys bigger than her. Since then you had a newfound respect and admiration for the brunette.

“Hey, where’s Armin?” Jean asked as he opened the door to let you and Eren inside.

“Got caught up with some projects,” you answered and Jean clicked his tongue. Eren and you took off your jackets and gave it to Jean for him to leave them in Pieck’s room.

“Sucks to be him. Porco and Reiner brought really good weed tonight,” he said as he made his way to the corridor.

Eren and you went to the living room, finding Pieck and her friends already starting with the bong. She complimented your dress and you grinned at her, spinning so she could see the back of it as well. After earning a couple of whistles from Pieck’s friends, you sat beside Eren.

“New dress?” he asked.

“Mmhm, bought it when Pieck said she was throwing another party,” you said. Eren laughed.

“I don’t know how you do this. I put on the first thing I saw in my closet,” he confessed and took the bong from Pieck. You took a moment to eye his black shirt and dark jeans.

“You don’t look so bad,” you commented, shrugging as Eren took a hit. “Is it really good?” you asked.

He hummed. “Want some?”

“I’d rather drink tonight. And last time I mixed weed and rum-”

“Yeah, I remember you sitting by the window with lost eyes like you were in another dimension” Eren chuckled, taking another hit. You hit him with one of the pillows to which he laughed harder.

Ever since the first time you had kissed him, Eren had made sure you didn’t feel uncomfortable around him. He behaved the same way he always did whenever he wasn’t thrusting inside of you as Armin stroked himself. Somehow it was really comfortable to know your friendship wasn’t in danger, that even if it had shifted to something entirely different he still found it in him to playfully nudge you during class or let you copy his notes if you shared a class.

One hour later, Pieck’s place was packed with people. The music was loud, big speakers filling the apartment as people danced around. Pieck had set a table only for booze and you couldn’t count all the bottles even if you tried. Whiskey, vodka, rum and cans of beer were on display for anyone to take and even if everyone already looked more than a bit tipsy, there was still alcohol to spare.

You watched amused as Eren played beer pong with Reiner, the cups filled with one shot of vodka instead of beer. Reiner won by a very short difference, which made Eren call a rematch, which he finally won. You played your own match with Porco but with beer, winning the match on your first try and making sure to remind him every chance you got the rest of the night, laughing at his pouty face. After dancing with some of your friends, you spotted Eren sitting on one of the sofas and went to sit next to him, asking how he was doing. Even if he swore he was okay, you noticed his head slightly swaying. You suggested dancing it off.

Next thing you knew, one of Eren’s hands was set on your hip as the other was placed on the small of your back, while you had your arms around his neck. The way his hips moving filling your mind with ideas of you riding him, his cock deep inside you as he grabbed your hair in his fist. Your eyes locked on his green ones for one moment before quickly shifting your gaze anywhere else but him. Even if you knew that if you were to make an advance he would be more than willing, you kept repeating to yourself that you weren’t alone. Pieck’s entire apartment was filled with people that knew you were Armin’s girlfriend. Honestly, most of them would take a second look if they saw how close Eren and you were dancing

Eren’s thigh moved forward until they were between your legs, your hips moving on their own against him. You cursed under your breath and then let out a small chuckle, looking back at your friend.

“You’re such an asshole,” you said. Eren raised his eyebrows, amused.

“Am I?”

Before you could reply, Eren had taken both of your hands and in a swift movement, made you spin until your back was against his chest. Not letting go of your hands, he placed them on top of your hips, pulling your ass against his crotch as he kept moving his hips to the beat of the song.

You felt as if every vodka shot you had taken with Pieck had gone straight to your head at once.

“Keep dancing,” Eren whispered against your ear, his voice sending bolts of pleasure directly between your legs.

Moving your hips to the music, you tried to focus on anything other than Eren’s semi-hard cock grinding against your ass. You looked around, afraid someone was going to notice but everyone seemed to be occupied on their own. You noticed Pieck straddling Jean on the couch as she danced on top of him, some other couples making out against the walls or dancing even more lavishly than you and Eren were. Still, you felt your knees getting weaker as you kept feeling his breath against your neck.

You arched your back and started throwing your hips back, your ass bouncing against Eren’s crotch along with the beat of the music. You felt his hands tensing over yours, grabbing your hips much harder as you danced.

Maybe nothing else would have happened if you hadn’t looked over your shoulder. Maybe someone would have whistled and you would have been brought to reality, remembering what everyone thought your status was and how inappropriate they were acting. But you did look over your shoulder, eyes locking for a couple of seconds with Eren, which was more than enough for him to drag you to one of the bathrooms and locking the door behind you.

Eren kissed you roughly as your back hit the bathroom sink, his hands roaming around your body.

“Wait, fuck- can we- is it okay if he?” he tried to ask in between the kiss, his body and mind colliding against each other.

“Yeah,” you said breathless, running up your hands across his back. “He said it was fine.”

That was all Eren needed for his hands to travel up your legs and underneath your small dress. He tugged on your panties and lowered them to the ground and you stepped away, letting him pick them up and storing them in his back pocket. He stood up again, his lips colliding with yours as he grabbed the back of your thighs, helping you get on the counter. His mouth travelled down your neck, leaving open-mouthed kisses until they reached the mount of your breasts, pressing his face against them and nipping on the skin gently, making sure not to leave marks.

He started lowering, kissing your stomach over your dress with his green eyes on yours as he sunk to his knees. His fingers trailed your skin from your ankles up to your thighs, spreading your legs apart gently until your pussy was in front of him. You looked at him, chest rising up and down from your ragged breathing as you watched him leave small kisses on the inside of your thighs.

“Only fair you get to come on my face this time,” he said. Not even the music outside the bathroom was loud enough for you not to hear him clearly, your legs twitching at his words. He smirked and pulled your legs apart wider as he trailed up a slow path of small kisses to your pussy.

As soon as he pressed his lips against your folds, both you and him noticed how wet you were. He hummed, the vibration of his voice making you breathe heavily, biting back a moan. Eren licked across your slit, collecting all your wetness with his tongue. It was the first time he was going down on you and damn if you weren’t already lightheaded. Plus, the fact you were doing it in your friend’s bathroom with everyone outside added a sultry element you seemed to enjoy.

Eren placed his mouth on you again, his tongue drawing teasing circles around your clit. You whimpered, your hand going to tangle on his hair, messy bun a bit dishevelled. He groaned against you, loving every time you pulled his locks and used the flat part of his tongue on your clit, earning new moans from you. He hooked one of your legs over his shoulder as he pushed the other one a little further apart, his mouth still moving on you.

He sucked gently on your clit and you threw your head back, hitting yourself with the mirror.

“Fuck-- Eren, please ,” you panted, your hips bucking against his face. Eren dug his fingers on the plush of your thighs as he kept moving his tongue, getting you closer and closer to your limit.

Eren began lapping exactly where you needed him, a hand shooting to your mouth to muffle your sounds as you whined. Your other hand tightened its hold on Eren’s hair. He let you keep his head in place as you rolled your hips against his face, setting your own rhythm as he saw you search for your high. As soon as he noticed your hips stuttering, its movements desperate, he grabbed your legs still again, his tongue directly playing with your clit.

You came on his mouth, a hand over your own as you tried your best not to make too much noise. Eren stayed a couple of moments after your orgasm, giving your pussy slow, delicate licks to help you ride your orgasm off.

“Told ya’ I owed you,” he huffed playfully, making you remember what he had told you after the first time you had given him head. You chuckled as he stood up, kissing you languidly. You could taste yourself in his mouth, your body reacting to him as if you couldn’t do anything else but press yourself against him.

Your hands started unbuttoning his shirt as he kissed your neck. Long ago you had come up with the rule of not leaving any marks on your skin. As much as you loved finding bruises and love bites whenever you were showering, you preferred that to be a thing just between Armin and you. Since you had made that request, Eren had been extremely gentle whenever he kissed your skin, letting his lips drag across your skin teasingly before placing a soft kiss.

“How do you like it?” he asked.

“Huh?” you asked, letting his shirt fall to the floor, your hands caressing his toned chest.

“Well, this is a fantasy,” he said, pulling away so he could look at your face, his lips brushing against yours. “So I want to make you feel good.”

Eren didn’t miss the way your legs clenched on either side of his waist. He went back to kissing the other side of your neck as you made up your mind, hands roaming around his back and hair as he did so.

He didn’t have to wait long for your answer.

“I want you to be rough with me,” you sighed. Eren pulled away once more and looked at you, one of his hands palming your breast.

“How rough?”

“Until I tell you to stop,” you breathed out, your back arching at his ministrations. Eren nodded and kissed you again, his tongue entering your mouth as you once again started losing focus of everyone that was happening.

In that moment, your mind was filled with his hand playing with your tits while the other one went back to your folds, his index and middle finger rubbing soft circles, making you moan against your mouth. Eren pulled away from you and you watched him take out his wallet and then a condom from it. He put it between his teeth and then undid his jeans, letting them fall to his ankles along with his underwear.

You could never get used to seeing Eren’s cock. A part of your brain still was shocked as you tried to remember this was your new normal, getting railed by your friend with your boyfriend’s permission. Your hand closed around his length and you started pumping him, his tip already leaking precum. Eren ripped the condom package and rolled it over himself all the way to the base.

You leaned over to kiss him again, this time his lips moving rougher on you. You tried locking your legs around his waist, wanting to feel his cock against you. Instead, Eren grabbed both your legs and yanked you down the counter and onto the floor. You stumbled a bit on your high heels but he quickly turned you around and bent you over the bathroom sink.

Eren lifted your dress until it was resting on your waist, your ass exposed to him. He parted your legs with his foot and then lined up his cock with your entrance. Only a couple of inches inside you was enough for you to let out a high-pitched moan, your hands grabbing on the faucet desperately, the stretch making your head spin.

A hard slap fell against your ass.

“Keep it the fuck down. Do you want everyone to know your boyfriend’s friend has his cock inside you?” he hissed. The determination of his voice made you clench around him. Eren grabbed a fistful of your hair and yanked your hair up, forcing you to look at your own reflection in the mirror.

You watched your eyes and parted lips as Eren kept pushing inside of you, a whimper escaping your lips once he bottomed out. He took your hands and put them against the mirror. His own hands slid down your back until they settled on your hips. He started thrusting against you, your breath creating a fog on the mirror in front of you. You let your head fall, biting your lip as he kept moving his hips.

One of Eren’s hands went to your jaw, making you look at yourself in the mirror once more. You could not only see your face flushed with desire but also how his hair was almost completely loose and falling over his forehead as he kept thrusting against you.

“Look at yourself. You love being fucked as a slut, don’t you?”

Once again his words stirred something deep inside you. You desperately tried to hold on to something, your hands sliding down against the mirror until you positioned them correctly again. Eren smacked your ass hard again.

“I asked a fucking question,” he grunted, giving a particularly harsh thrust.

“Yes- fuck, yes, I do,” you panted. Eren picked up his face and you felt your legs falter. “Keep going, please.”

His hand went back to holding your head up by your hair, the other one gripping your ass firmly. Eren’s grunts were barely audible due to the music outside but made you melt every time you heard them. You started moving your hips back, meeting his thrusts as you did your best not to make too much noise.

Eren slapped your ass again, making you clench against him. He threw his head back, cursing under his breath and let his hand fall on your ass once more. Only a couple more thrusts were needed for you to come around him as well, one of your hands flying to your mouth to try and muffle your loud moans.

You heard Eren curse again and fasten his pace, letting go of your hair and settling both his hands on your hips. His orgasm followed a few moments later and you heard him groan, his cock twitching inside of you. You squeezed him as he came down from his high, earning a soft chuckle from the man behind you.

“Stop, I literally have nothing left,” he joked, removing himself from you and discarding the condom in the bathroom bin.

You laughed along as he helped you stand up again, lowering your dress in the process. Thanking him, you looked at your reflection again, cleaning the eyeliner smudge on the outside corner of your eyes and fixing your hair. Eren pulled up his underwear and pants and once his clothes were back in place, he handed you your panties that he had put inside his pockets.

“I can’t come out of this bathroom holding my panties,” you reminded him with a soft laugh. “Can you like- keep them for a moment? Once we leave this place you can hand them back.”

“Sure, sure,” Eren said, putting your panties back in his pocket. You looked at each other in the eyes and couldn’t help but burst into laughter once more.

“I’ll leave first, wait a bit before going outside,” you instructed him and Eren nodded, leaning against the counter and taking out his phone to keep himself distracted as he waited.

Nobody noticed you leaving the bathroom, nor the funny way you were walking. You grabbed one of the beers from the table and plopped on one of the sofas. You observed your surroundings and wondered if time had really passed as everything seemed to be the same. Jean and Pieck were now making out in the same sofa she had been dancing on and nobody spared a second glance at you.

You felt someone sitting down next to you, opening a can of beer as well. You turned to the side and saw Eren, his hair tied on a half-bun again and looking visibly refreshed. His eyes locked with yours and he smirked.

You clinked your beer cans. You sure knew how to keep a secret.

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