#also my hair literally feels like a cloud 🥺

[bunnyboy-juice]

fluffy

[isa-is-asleep]

Disclaimer for my sense of humor, did I tell you I grew up watching comedy theaters. Yeah that's why I can't go 5 seconds in a post without making an offhand joke because most theater humor is not kind. So sorry for that.

Alright so we have it like this:

Imagine you're a Moroccan woman, yeah couldn't be me. I'd rather be a dusty cloud....

But not the matter. You wanna shower and feel hell at the same time since you have adhd.

So you hit up your street shop owner and he hits you up with a soap like supplement called "Saboon Beldi"

Looks like this:

As far as my 5 second google search it says it's made with olive and black olive and is older than one county I can't mention.

And it's literally natural, beldi (بلدي) is a darija word (darija is an arabic slang that will make you lose brain cells, it's the worst best Arabic slang lol).

So you get that and your other girl thingys you use for showering. Idk tell me how y'all do hair care, I wanna grow mine, please 🥺.

And you go to your shower, and or the Public one if you want to shower with your friends if you have ones.

Don't be weirded out by that. Moroccan people (usually women) love these community type things, or just gossip. Yes definitely gossip.

I usually don't go, only when Forced with my brother.

Okay I should stop over sharing.

Now that out of the way, you spread that. I forgot the word for cream, you spread that black thing over you (with water ofc) sinc it makes the process of shedding dead skin easier.

Then you bring out the legendary, exotic Omega weapon that made many Morrocan children weep while getting the life scrubbed because their mothers certainly don't know how to fucking hold back. The glove of truth and power. The legendary Kharka (خرقة) !

Using the Black Glove of Darkness and The Black Concoction that smells way too nice for being made with oil. Seriously how tf did they do that.

You use it to scrub your entire body. Literally.

Can't get to your back? Well you little fucker why don't you just have someone do it for you. And free of Labor.

Isn't it fun?!

And then after 30 minutes or an hour since you're a woman and hair makes things harder if my ass that doesn't know shit knows about long hair shower difficulties is that it will take longer.

Or not cuz your adhd just says fuck it and speed run it.

And when all is finished. You see that the green dead skin or something (I still don't know what it is), you see that You've become the living embodiment of a tomato with how hot the shower and hard you scrubbed your Self.

You end it with doing the Normal shit like doing shampoo, shaving, using soap and the "normal" things you do in a shower.

You leave the shower half faint and in dire need of laying for half a day (seriously it's exhausting, except if you're not me I never get exhausted, just fatigued, wait...shit)

Then when you get your energy recharged. You feel way way better. Like seriously If it was east I'll do it everyday because it makes me feel new and shit but common it's tedious.

If you're interested in learning more Moroccan culture or just weird ass info in a weird humorous way than I am available (probably, if I am not that's cuz school)

Also pray for me that I can make coffee in secret tomorrow.

Goodbye Isa.

Owner of a hell calico cat is out

Also this.

I can't get this song out of my head, been listening to it for the entire day

https://youtu.be/Rec0a1UBz0Q

The black glove of darkness sounds painful, but your skin must be so smooth! Thank you for the bonus cat picture! Your little goblin is adorable

Good luck with the coffee!

[hwanghyunjinenthusiast]

omg glad to know astrology talk is welcome 😭 i actually tried to keep it short but i think it’s fascinating bc some of the boys’ placements are so obvious i could go on for a long time lmao

i love how relating signs to body parts can be so subtle! like for the tummy thing for example, that could also manifest itself into enjoying napping on your partner’s belly (🥺), always keeping a hand on their stomach, just for comfort or as a soothing thing. there’s something about virgo placements that screams worship to me, bc it’s all about purity so there would be something so? reverential? almost sacred? about kissing a partner’s belly.

aries placements are so interesting to me bc the head encapsulates so many things including 4/5 of the senses so it’s a very sensual sign, literally. aries is 100% a sign that would love kissing in all its forms, bc some people actually don’t like kissing! but aries enjoys any type of kiss, including some tongue action, if there’s any. for example felix has in moon in aries and boy’s always trying to get a kiss from everyone 😭 which leads me to my next point, which is that i noticed that many aries placements seem to love/be good at asmr and might even be turned on by it, and whispering in general. as for the face touching, notice how hyunjin always willingly lets changbin touch and praise his lips, looked on cloud 9 when seungmin was applying that face mask, just overall likes being pampered, he’s so soft. and i agree for the hair! very important and very sensitive. would probably internally shed a tear if someone he’s interested in brushed a strand of his hair behind his ear.

one placement in skz that i think is so obvious is chris’ sagittarius mars lmao (sagittarius rules the thighs) notice how he always playfully squeezes people’s thighs when he’s excited or wants to show support/affection. also always fiddling when he’s wearing ripped jeans and rubbing his own thighs as a self-soothing mechanism. sOFT

No please, feel free to share as much of your observations as you'd like! I haven't really been as intuned with astrology in recent years so, it's nice reading observations again. It feels nostalgic oddly enough lol.

Me, a Virgo Mars: 👁👄👁 No jokes aside, the body worship makes sense. I think it's a mix of adoration and acts of service. Wanting to show someone you love/want etc them without explicitly stating it, y'know? To the other anon who called Hyunjin a tummy enthusiast, you were onto something.

I didn't expect Felix to have a Moon in Aries ngl but, hey the more you know. Oh, I think Hyunjin for sure loves kissing. Like you mentioned, he does a lot with his head and involving the head so, it wouldn't surprise me if he was a big fan of kissing and nuzzling his partner.

Thigh enthusiast Chris confirmed /lh. I didn't actually pick up on his habit of touching other peoples' thighs, that's so interesting. I have noticed he touches his own quite a bit but, never thought much of it.

[sillygoofyqueer]

The Untamed review: episode six!!!!!!

Literally have to skip the intro at this point

The Cloud Recesses looks so peaceful hehe

The goofy music, what the hell is going on

Nie Huaisang, you look so sketchy what the hell

"I brought peanuts!! ☺️" You are such a guy, Huaisang.

HE JUST GOT SNATCHED

Oh, it's fine, they're just drinking lmao

I love that even Jiang Cheng is getting involved

It also answers my question of who bought the alcohol

Fuck me, Huaisang is absolutely pissseeeddd

"I'll be fine, as long as I have wine" Wei Wuxian, you have a problem.

"I don't know how the Lan Clan puts up with you" "Hey, I'm adorable 🤭" Wei Wuxian, you little geek. Yes you are.

Don't insult Cheng's standards hahahaha

HHAHAHA THEY'RE SO PISSED

LITERALLY CALLING OUT HIS STANDARDS

AAAAAAHHHHH WANGJI

Eyo, the fuck was that position?!?!????

You know, I was wondering who would notice their literal yelling

Hahahaha, Wei Wuxian adjusting his hair and acting so casual for his boyfriend

Wangji just wants to be involved :(

They're all super none suspicious at all lmaooo

WUXIAN, WILL YOU STOP OFFERING HIM ALCOHOL???

"join us.." bro might as well have said 'kiss me now' with the pouty tone and the tug of the sleeve

I like how Wangji didn't pull back, just gay glared

"go to the punishment chamber" "what chamber??"

HUAISANG AND CHENG JUST FUCKING PASSING OUT HAHAHA

"too drunk to walk" you just want to flirt with Wangji for longer, you whore

HE'S TRYING TO STOP THEM FROM GETTING UP, THE LITTLE WAVES OF 'stay down stay down!!!'

NO WAY ARE THEY VOMITING

What's that talisman???

BRO NO WAY

I'd be furious

He looks so proud of himself hahahahaha

Why's he closing the doors??? Gay. Suspicious.

Don't you dare, WUXIAN, YOU MONSTER

Peer pressure to the extreme 😔

Wuxian looks so excited

I love how Wangji just fucking dies

Wuxian's look of absolute shock and concern

"go back to your room please" bro is so worried about him

Wangji is literally just dead, okay

Awwww, putting him to bed, what a good guy

Did he take the talisman off him?

Alcoholic, get help

YOU ARE LITERALLY A FREAK

"your headband is tilted" "TILTED?!?!"

Wangji is so drunk

Hahaha, just slapping him away

What a gay guy

Okay, what the fuck "you're gonna be alone forever" JUST YOU WAIT WUXIAN

Does Wuxian just find pleasure in bringing up parentless trauma to deal with his own parentless existence???

Stoooop, he's sobbing

I'm sobbing now

I like how Wuxian realises what he said and just starts trauma dumping. Awwwww. He's making Wangji feel better methinks.

THEY LOOK SO HAPPY!!!! STOOOOOP 🥺🥺🥺

Toasting together 😔

I wonder how Wangji's feeling with a hangover

TEA BREAK WITH THE LAN LADS

Bros are literally gossiping at this point.

Xichen has the info and looks so pretty giving it

How is Qiren more bothered about Wuxian being there

THEY'RE SLEEPING, LEAVE THEM ALONE

Shit.

HAHAHAHA WANGJI IS JUST FUCKING GOOOONE.

Wuxian trying not to laugh.

How does Qiren sound so offended, get your shit together

SNITCH!!!!!!

Kill the snitch.

They're so worried about Wangji being involved, I'm cackling

"MY BROTHER??? You sure you don't mean a different Wangji?"

I like that Wangji is so fucking ready to repent and the others are terrified

WUXIAN TRYING TO STAND UP FOR WANGJI, I'M SOBBING

He is a very troublesome young lad

DO NOT BRING HIS DEAD MOTHER INTO THIS, QIREN. I WILL SQUARE UP. I AM NOT AFRAID TO BEAT AN OLD MAN DOWN.

Back off. Don't drop lore and not be willing to speak.

OWNING UP FOR HIS MISTAKES I'M SOBBING.

Not wanting Wangji to be hurt 🥺

I'm sorry, three Hundred Vs FIFTY???

Wuxian is so scared

WHY IS WANGJI BEING PUNISHED SO MUCH, YOU BITCH.

Nah, bro is dead

Wangji takes it upright, WHAT A MANNNN

Bros already fighting.

Quit your whining, is what Yanli is saying

I love that they all freeze at the sight of Xichen, bros are terrified

Wuxian sounds so pathetic, bro can't even bow haha

Xichen coming in to save the day

XICHEN YOU'RE SUCH A SWEETHEART. IT'S BECAUSE WUXIAN STOOD UP FOR WANGJI, ISN'T IT!!!

Awww, Wuxian just wants to know about his mother

QIREN WAS CLASSMATES WITH CANGSE SANREN????

He's saying they were alike, I'm crying

Wuxian has never looked more attentive

Cheng laughing at the thought of Sanren being like Wuxian

"let's just say it was difficult for him to keep his beard looking good back then" HAHAAHAHAAAA SANREN WAS A MONSTER I LOVE HER

WEN QING!!! babes, you plot so much

Wen whatever the fuck??? That's a big power pose but you look awful

Corpses be vibing hard, me fr

QING YOU'RE SO SMART

It's so peaceful, and Wuxian looks so happy

Awe, the way Wangji is immediately stirred by Wuxian's voice!!!

And how Wuxian calls for him instantly

Bro goes right for his robes - so neat

Fit WHO SAID THAT

He literally runs to see Wangji, not being inconspicuous at all

Zewu Jun is literally shipping them, even less inconspicuous

Wangji doesn't even look surprised, he knows what Xichen is doing

AT LEAST BE NEAT, WUXIAN

He's so fucking happy, how could someone not be in love with him

Bro is just weak

LET HIM HUDDLE FOR WARMTH

Okay, you are just slandering him at this point

Love at first fight

Bro is trying to be friendly and Wangji is just not having it

THE FEAR WHEN WUXIAN STARTED UNDRESSING

Why else would he be undressing

"please don't leave me here" and Wangji just stops. Dude ain't fooling no one

"I will stop undressing" Wuxian...

Inviting him to Yunmeng and offering to pick things for him 🥺🥺 baby's first date

Wangji has never been more stoic and stubborn

Watching him waddle is so cute in the water

THE FUCK'S IN THE WATER

WEI WUXIAN GOT SNATCHED FOR REAL THIS TIME

"Where'd he go?? FUCK-"

Oooh, a caveee

I like how Wuxian is spluttering and Wangji is so calm

They're so pretty together

Wangji actually looks concerned for once, the world must be ending for him to show such emotion

Wuxian trembling in the background like a little bitch /aff

A GUQIN??? WHAT THE FUUUCKKK

Wuxian is literally just being fucking thrown around

Wangji, what the fuck is going on

Wuxian flailing in the background

PROTECTING HIS HUBBY FOR THE FIRST TIME!!! THE START OF SOMETHING GAY

The way Wuxian looks at Wangji with such gayness in his eyes

BUNNIES!!! IT'S A METAPHOR. SYMBOLISM. SOMETHING

Hahaha they have the headbands

Are these rabbits boutta attack

STOP TRYING TO GET HIS FUCKING HEADBAND. YOU SIMP.

The literal music is telling us that this is gay

Wangji flying to his boyfriend to share the headband.

Tying them together 🤭☺️

Wuxian looks so impressed (and in love)

Wuxian's giggle

Wangji doesn't want Wuxian to get hurt

RESPECT THE HEIRLOOM, WUXIAN

What is it with Wangji and dragging Wuxian around

The slutty sitting from Wuxian, respect it

WANGJI ENTERING ANOTHER STATE OF BEING.

Wuxian is sooo smart.

The fact that Wangji just stares at Wuxian until he understands what Wangji wants

Dusting off the seat lmaoo

Why is Wangji so shocked??? Bet it was his mother

WHAT'S GOING ON??? IS IT THE FUCKING BUNNIES??

Standing side by side awwww

WHO THE FUCK IS THIS?????

L-Lan Yi????? She's so pretty I'm in love

Qiren standing at the door like a worried parent and Xichen trying to soothe him 😔

THEY'RE MISSING

Don't slander Wuxian, watch it

A storm??? Looks pretty clear to me

Everyone's fucking looking now

Cheng and Yanli are so worried awhhhh

Yanli is counting on you, Cheng, don't you dare disappoint her

"I will find him and break his legs" he cares so much

Yanli my baby, BE CAREFUL

JIN ZIXUAN YOU BETTER WATCH YOURSELF. YOU EVEN SO MUCH AS TOUCH HER WRONG AND I'LL GUT YOU

Nice catch though, props to that

(DON'T YOU FREEZE ON ME)

Yanli you can do better, Qing is right there

I literally love Lan Yi, she's so awesome

HAHA Wangji just hitting him to make him bow. The little smile afterwards as well

SHE'S A BUNNY LOVER!!!

Noo, Lan Yi can't goooo, she's so badass

Wuxian is a little blunt

SHE MADE IT???? DAMN, I'M IN LOVE

Eat it. I dare you. It'd be so funny

Literally what is going on

Destiny?? For these homosexuals????

BURIAL MOUNDS LET'S GOOOOO

Xue Chonghai?? Is he related to Xue Yang??

This is so cool, LIVING PEOPLE????

Man, people are so power hungry. Greedy bastards

THE TORTOISE OF SLAUGHTER??? HAHAHAHAHA I PREFER THE DANMEI VERSION

Oh, lives taken, she's dropping lore

Evil laugh, suspicious.

She called Wuxian smart, he really is teehee

Wuxian looks so pleased, and THE SIDE EYE FROM WANGJI HAHAHAHA

Put down??? Damn

BURIAL GROUNDS WHOOP WHOOP

So they broke it into pieces.

Bro should not have overfed the Yin Iron

Such evil laughter- HOLY SHIT, BRO HAS FUCKING LOST IT. He needs to brush his damn teeth.

He wasn't wrong to be fair

I like his fucking mood swings "HAAHAHAHAHA- 😐"

Alliances whoop whoop

Ah, burying the past, that's never gone wrong

Wuxian getting told off by Wangji

Wuxian and Lan Yi are so on the same wavelength

Wuxian gasping because they are

FUCKING SEXISM BOOOOO

SHE WAS FRIENDS WITH SANREN AAAAGGHHHH

He looks so hopeful, I am sobbing. And Wangji's look towards him and the music and ehhhh I'm sobbing

LAN YI, YOU DIDN'T MEAN TO FAIL HER

Ah, she started reading. Always a bad start.

SHE FOUND IT, wasn't very well hidden then

Freezing cold. Good lore though, poetic

Wuxian slowly turning towards Wangji

She was blindsided by her naivety I'm sobbing

So fucking poetic

NO way. There's two badasses??? And Lan Yi fought Sanren?????

She just wanted to protect herrrr....lesbians

Bro flew over her, it was impossible to break her

NOOOO, HER HUBRIS

Ew blood

She can't die, she just wanted what was best for the clan!!!

She looks ill, I'm so upset right now

It still sounds so pretty, even if she's struggling

KILL IT WITH FIRE

She sacrificed herself to keep it safe 😔

THAT'S THE END OF THE EPISODE?!??!?? WHAT THE HELL????

[1004tyun-archive]

mommy 🥺🥺🩷 i don’t have much to say today for now, i’m so happy you’re feeling better about what happened… if you ever need to talk about it again i’m all ears and will keep reassuring you that it’ll be okay 🥺🥺 i believe in you my love 🥺🩷

we had pretty heartfelt conversations last night and i still can’t believe mommy is my girlfriend 🥺🥺 i feel like i wanna talk about you to literally everyone 😭 sometimes i just wanna hit close moots’ inboxes with how much i love you but then i remember i have to be less annoying dushfjsjfj i love you mommy 🥺😭🩷🩷

we never included kkura in our moodboards yet so i thought i should start doing it because she’s our bias too 🥹🥹 actually even just including her in the moodboard makes me wanna write for her again~ hehehe

the reason why i went for this moodboard is because while our conversation was heartfelt… it was also… hehehehe 🤭🩷

my beautiful girlfriend 🥺🥺 i feel like i had so much to say about how i felt and still feel since you fell asleep but i can’t express it well… i miss you and i’m so so in love with you 🥺🩷 everyday i wake up and it’s like i realize again that my girlfriend is the most beautiful talented kind and soft person in the universe 🥺 i love you so so much and i don’t know how to explain it i just feel like tingly and on a cloud 🥺🥺 my mommy is the best… i love you 🥺😭🩷🩷 i hope you sleep well my sweetie pie 🥺🩷 mwah~

baby~ 🥺🥺🩵 i appreciate that we were able to talk it through last night it bothered me so much but now it doesn’t even phase me 🥹 at the end of the day what happened isn’t a reflection of who i am and those people were jerks who took advantage :/ they can all kick rocks tbh you’re the sweetest person in the world 🥺🥺 i can’t believe someone so beautiful soft and sweet and strong is actually my girlfriend!! 🥺😭😭 you’re like a little mochi donut i wanna keep you in my pocket 🥺🥺🩵🩵

we did have some pretty deep and heartfelt convos last night 🥺🥺 i still can’t believe we’re girlfriends like woah i love my baby and my baby loves me back 😳😳 we fit together so well too~ 🥺🩵🩷 omg it’s so hard to resist the urge to run to our moot’s inboxes and be like “*twirling hair* so there’s this girl i’m reaally into idk if you’ve seen her around or anything~ 😳😳😳” dkshsjsjs 😭😭 i love talking about you it’s like i said before i’m always waiting for the opportunity to bring you up in conversation i feel like talking about you isn’t enough i need you in my purse like a good luck charm 🥺🩵 i love you so much my baby~ 🩵🩵

i am SO obsessed with this moodboard oh my god it’s so perfect our tyunkkura 🥹🥹🥹🥹 and a cute little kitty ice cream waffle like omf this really is so us I LOVE IT 🥺😭🩵🩵 it seems like you had a lot of fun writing for sakura last time i’d love to see what else you have in mind for her 🥺🩵

hehehe our conversation was very heartfelt but also very…,,, 😳😳😳😳🤭🤭🤭🩵🩵

my baby 🥺 it’s so funny how we can talk to each other for hours and hours and still find things to talk about and still end up missing each other i love being by your side and i love being your girlfriend so much i hope i’m someone you’re proud to call your girlfriend too~ 🥺🩵 i’m so in love with you cherry, i really am 🥺 i’m so thankful to be with the kindest most patient beautiful softesr warmest and most welcoming woman to ever walk this earth 🥺🩵 the moon and all her stars have their favorites and we must be one of them if she worked her magic just for us to meet each other at the perfect time 🥺🥺🩵 you make me feel so light, like a feather or a cloud 🥺 my baby really is the best~ i love you so much hehe my cutie pie >//<

[writerfae]

Ok 👉🏼👈🏼

I have a question ??

How do you make your mood boards? I don’t have an artistic bone in my body, so I don’t really draw my characters. Pfp isn’t my art, just my ocs haha.

Anyway some of it is a time/laziness issue. But like, I feel like I could do a mood board.

And I was wondering how you make them, because they’re so pretty ??? Every time I see one of your mood boards—instant dopamine. The colors and 🥺

Sorry for just popping in your ask box, but I was wondering like where do you find pictures, what program you use, stuff like that.

(Also sorry if this is a basic question. I literally have zero experience with any sort of art that’s not writing)

Hi! Don’t apologize, I’m always open for questions like this ^^ (also thanks for the compliment!)

So, making moodboards is pretty easy actually! The secret is finding fitting pictures and a good app to make a collage out of it

Let’s start with the pictures.

I gotta (shamefully) admit that for my latest moodboards I took most of the pictures off of Pinterest (which is always my last choice, but I ran out of good pics and tbh? Everyone else does it and I’m not using it to make money or whatever so I guess I’m fine)

But usually I use sites with free to use pictures like unsplash and pexels. There all you have to do is look for and download the pictures you need. Just type in search words that fit to the character/world you aim for.

I don’t know if you need it, but here’s some things I look for when I make OC moodboards:

a face claim / prominent feature of my character (hair, eyes, whatever)

their favorite color or just one you associate with them

maybe also a texture, like wood or leaves or clouds

the character’s hobby or things they adore (yes this includes food)

everything you associate with them tbh: animals and plants, maybe even an element

symbolism, so things that are important to them or make out a part of their personality (see: a crown as symbol for an OC who’s a queen)

jewelry or clothes they would wear

I personally don’t use this one too often but many people also use fitting quotes

(For me it’s also important to stick to a color scheme and make it all fit together aesthetically, but that’s probably a weird quirk of mine and honestly everyone should do what they prefer. If you rather have it colorful or just want to go with the vibes, go for it!)

Choose as many pictures as you like. Personally I use between five and nine (nine only if I make a “classy” moodboard), but like I said, that’s up to you.

By the way, moodboards aren’t just great for characters but also for character groups, story locations and just story vibes in general (I know you know that already, I just felt like mentioning it ^^)

Okay so now you have all your pictures, but how to turn them into a moodboard?

I do all my moodboards on my phone/tablet, so I use apps to put them together. There’s plenty of collage apps you can use, or just any picture editing app with a collage option (I think most have them).

Just search for “collage”or “photo collage” in your app store and you’ll find many apps you can download for free.

Now to find a good app that fits your needs is up to you and probably requires you to try out different apps to find the one that is best for you.

Some only let you do before mentioned “classic” collages (you know those 3x3 pics that are simply next to each other, like a grid), but there’s also ones with more unique layouts you can use.

I recommend the latter because it gives you more options and makes the moodboard more interesting, but again, just a personal opinion.

I don’t know if it’s available for you, but I use an app called InCollage (it’s only for android though, I think). If you don’t want to use apps I’m sure there’s online programs for these kind of things as well.

And when you found the right pictures and your preferred collage app to use, all that’s left to do is create the moodboard!

Throw all the pictures in a collage and rearrange them however you like. Choose a layout of your liking and a fitting background. I usually go with a color/texture that matches the pictures or my OC’s color. And that’s it!

It can take quite some time to find the right pictures and arrangement (my personal record is spending three hours on a moodboard xD) but it’s really quite simple! And so much fun too!

So that was my (admittedly way too long - sorry for that) guide. I hope I was able to help and wish you lots of fun creating your own moodboards! :)

[btscontentenjoyer]

OH MY GOD KIKI. I know this story has been a long time coming and I've been highly anticipating it the whole time, but it's just completely blown me and all of my already high expectations away. I had to sit there and take deep breaths after finishing this, and I'm honestly still shaking a little from how overwhelmed it made me feel, but I'll try to say a few coherent words before I let all of my unhinged thoughts as I was reading unfold.

The fact that you've managed to put together a story with scenes of such a variety - softer, heart-melting scenes, extremely hot, mind-melting smut scenes and heart-breaking angsty ones- all of them accompanied by the same undertones perfectly interwoven with the main plot just amazes me. I was so amazed, in fact, that most of my notes while reading are just a bunch of emojis lmaooo, but I think it's only fair that you see the insanity you've caused me.

"You can't tell what’s louder—the crunch of dewy, end-of-summer grass pricking the soft skin of your thighs like angry thorns, or the cracking of bones as your body thumps to the ground from your bedroom window." Daaaamn that's a great way to start a story.

“Hi,” he says impassively, eyes darting over your figure. A loose strand of hair dangles in front of his eyes, teasing you. “You’re wearing makeup?” The strand of hair already has me going crazy, let's see how far that craziness will go...

“Be more careful,” he commands, peering up at you with an icy gaze. “Got it?” God, the dad thing of taking care of your 'wound' immediately and then that commanding voice shouldn't be as hot as it is, right?

"The deafening sound of the bulky silver band on his finger, tapping against the steering wheel as he begins driving to the hotel you frequent, is a sick reminder." 😔😔😔

“Happy three years sober!” You announce with a cheesy smile, throwing your arms up eagerly." Aaaah okay.

“Ah,” he huffs in recognition. His eyes are fixed on the road, but there’s the tiniest hint of a smirk on his face. Success. It takes everything in you not to physically rejoice. “I’m surprised you remembered.” Not both of us having the same reaction lmaooo

‘It’s okay to smile; you deserve it,’ is what you want to tell him. It's not your place, though. You opt for: “It’s a huge deal, Jungkook,” instead. Reaching over, you gently tuck the stray strand of hair behind his decorated ear." Stooop, she's so cute. But I fear that she's not really putting in all of that energy in the best of places 😔😔😔

"A somber aura hangs around him like a dark, dreary rain cloud, and in moments like this, when it’s so visible, you just… need to touch him." That's exactly the vibe I got from the teasers too! The stormy atmosphere in terms of the mood of the story.

"The feeling of the frigid metal is agonizing. Not physically—his grip loosens immediately after the initial tug—but emotionally. You know why he doesn’t want you to mark him. Any evidence of you, other than your weekly babysitting duties, would unravel the entire life he’s built for himself." Yeah, there's no way that it doesn't hurt constantly being reminded of it. But there's also no way to forget something like that anyway.

"After some rustling and tiny sniffles, Yul answers. “Da-” She only manages a syllable before breaking into a cry-induced coughing fit. You cringe, poor Bunny. “Daddy!” 🥺🥺🥺 The cutie is here! The ray of sunshine peeking through the clouds!

“Thank you, good job,” he affirms. “Yul, daddy is…” Dark pupils flicker over to you, his face scowled to match. He eyes you like you’re an annoying stain on his leather seat. A dirty little secret that’s keeping him from his daughter. The gesture sends a dagger through your chest. Usually, Jungkook tells his wife he’s working overtime, but he can’t bring himself to lie to his only daughter. “Busy.” The way he's speaking to his daughter, the please and thank you literally had me 🥺🥺🥺 and pouting irl. But then immediately when he looks at OC like that, my expression changed to 😠😠😠 Like, mister, this is a decision you've made yourself, you're as much to blame as her.

"After a few months of dedication and trust building, Yul finally initiated you into her inner circle of squishmallows, all of which shared the surname, Jeon, followed by whatever random title her baby brain bestowed them. Jeon Ruru, a glass of strawberry milk, was her favorite. You coo in remembrance." She's so freaking cuteeeeeee. Watch me coo at everything about her because I'm literally melting right now.

“Don’t you think it’s a little unfair?” Despite his warning, she continues. “Getting her used to sleeping with you and then not being here?” Ah, the good ol' using your child as an excuse to ask the questions you really wanted to ask, with a dash of guilt tripping too, of course. But then again, her husband is cheating on her while he's away soooo...

"It’s not that he didn’t do his research, and Yul certainly wasn’t an accident. He had wanted her more than anything. Especially after the… Incident. A baby-sized hole was left in Jungkook’s chest. Every day, it grew bigger and bigger until, eventually, that bitter emptiness would’ve swallowed him alive." Yeah... ☹☹☹

"He catches his reflection while brushing his teeth. His eyes are dark, cold, distant. Those same eyes belong to his daughter, but all he sees when looking into hers is love, innocence, and everything good in life." 😔😔😔🥺🥺🥺

"Typically, Jungkook finds it adorable when Yul refers to herself in the third person. The way she says it this time makes him frown. “Jeon Yul is not a scaredy cat. Jeon Yul is a baby, that’s all.” Realizing that she’d probably heard the unfavorable title at daycare, his chest tightens. With a heavy sigh, he rests his chin on top of her round head, swaying back and forth. Her hair smells like green apples from her baby soap. “Why were you scared, sweetheart?” My eyes welling up with tears from how sweet this is 😭😭😭

“I like Baby Shark,” Yul says, completely ignoring his question. The teeniest, tiniest, most precious yawn slips out, two little front teeth on full display before her lips smack together sleepily. Truly living up to her nickname." LITERALLY!!!! THE CUTEST!!!!

"Why is daddy’s nose so big? He’d be lying if he said that last, brutally honest question hadn’t caught him off guard when she first uttered it on his hip at the grocery store." Lmaooooo

"Still, Jungkook can’t help but wonder who’s more dependent on the other. When he thinks about it, undoubtedly, the answer is him. Because as long as he wakes up to a little foot in his back, a fist in his hair, and the smell of green apple baby soap, he has a reason to keep going." This whole scene…. I can't even explain how many feelings it brought to me but I can say that this is the most beautiful and adorable and emotional father daughter dynamic I've ever read. I love them together and I'm legit pouting while writing this with misty eyes.

"His incessant need to defend his parenting makes your heart ache. “Hey, I-” 🥺🥺🥺 He really is such a good father. And sometimes the problems we have with our own selves can slightly bleed through our relationships with others, including our children, it can't have been easy, everything he's gone through, but all that matters is that he tries. And you can really tell how amazing of a father he is by the difference in everything about him when he talks to his daughter 🥺🥺🥺🥺 Aaaah I'm so soft for their relationship, I can't.

"Lifting his head, Jungkook looks you directly in the eyes. His are glassy and gentle now, but the fingers that hook into your lace bra, right between the cups, are rough and abrasive. “C’mere,” he gruffs, pulling you over the center console until you’re uncomfortably sandwiched between his solid chest and the steering wheel. There’s no effort to make room for you; he doesn’t slide his seat back. He doesn’t compromise any of his space for you. You accept it, steadying yourself on his shoulders with a grunt." Hmmm, that last bit about not making space for her and not compromising hmmmm, just the way he's doing with her in his life.

"Sometimes, you question what your presence in his life truly is. Are you an escape or a punching bag? Are you merely something he can sink his nails and teeth into when angry? Something he can break without consequence? The sound of thread ripping and buttons popping fills the car as he slides the silk off your shoulders, letting the delicate material fall to the floor without a care in the world." Yeah 😔😔😔 Those are valid questions.

“You care about me?” Moonlight cuts through the dewy window, beaming against the side of his pale face, highlighting the taut pull in his features. His question seems genuine, but the answer is obvious, isn’t it? Simply being here with him makes the entire foundation of your soul, all of your morals and beliefs, crumble to pieces. Against your better judgment, you’re still here." This situation definitely has a feel of doom to it, in my opinion. If OC was my friend irl, I would absolutely advise her not to waste so much emotional energy on someone like Jungkook. Because it really must be exhausting to do all of that and question whether it matters at all in the end. But seeing it all from her POV and also how Jungkook is with his daughter, and maybe even the way he views himself, I also kind of get why she's so emotionally invested in him.

"The answer should be obvious, but you don’t think Jungkook could internalize love if it was right in front of him." 😔😔😔

“Right, of course.” With the same hand holding you, Jungkook taps his index finger against your glossy pout, “open.” Just barely parting your lips, you let the thick digit slide between them. Immediately, he presses down against your tongue, trying to coax a gag out of you. “What if I want to fuck this pretty little mouth until you cry? How does that sound? Would you like that?”

"The sight makes your lips part. It’s so pretty. Something about how the moonlight catches the glowy pink tip, peeking out from under his foreskin. The light accentuates every ridge and vein on his girthy shaft. So yummy it has you drooling-" The infamous pretty cock under moonlight description. Iconic.

“Is this what you wanted?” He peers down at you over his prominent nose, one hand clutching the roof of his Mercedes." Something about that pose with the hand on the roof is just??? so fucking hot????

"The hem of his black dress shirt flows over you, obstructing his view. He places it between his teeth with an annoyed groan, wanting to watch the swell in your neck as you swallow him like a snake." And another behavioural thing driving me insane. These details are crazy, why is this man and everything he does so hot??? I can't even comment on the thing he says afterwards without just incoherently screeching.

"Throughout your acquaintances, Jungkook was rarely this vocal. Maybe some praise sprinkled in here and there, but seldom anything substantial. Tonight, however, he’s been dishing out sweet talk like candy. You can’t pinpoint precisely what, but something’s changed." Has he decided it's their last time together or something 👀👀👀

"The way his teeth snarl around the hushed curse makes you smile, eyes closing as you relish in his pleasure. Maybe you’re too horny, or perhaps the blood rushing to your head from being upside down for so long is making you crazy, but you wish you could live in this moment forever. Wallowing in the darkness, frozen in time with him. Yeah, you think, that would be wonderful." She really is so down bad for him 😔😔😔 But the delusions must end someday, and she's already getting hurt every time she realizes that what she's doing and feeling isn't being fully reciprocated, or at least not outwardly.

"See, in many ways, Jungkook is different from any other guy you’ve been with prior. For one, you didn’t meet via horny messages on Tinder at 1 a.m. For two, he’s older, meaning he’s much more intelligent and much more experienced. After years and years of honing in on his craft, he just knows how to fuck. Jungkook is one of the rare few penis-havers in the world who can orgasm back to back; no refractory period necessary. Truly a hidden gem." Fuck I forgot about that…

“If you want it so bad, come get it.” The fact that I can just picture the smug look that comes with that line…

"He’s pounding into you now, choking you tighter than he ever has, but he pecks you so delicately. Lips barely ghosting over the shell of your ear. So gentle and tender. As tears stream down your cheeks for the second time tonight, you can’t help but feel there’s a hidden meaning behind his words." Yeah, I definitely feel that meaning too 😔😔😔

"And all the while, his mind is somewhere else as his body swallows you alive." 😔😔😔😔😔

"But if soulmates exist as they do in the books, you wish on every falling star that Jungkook is yours." Girl, you can't really help him if he doesn't want to be helped.

“I love yo-” 😳😳😳😳😳 Yeah, that's completely overwhelming, I was so caught off guard, damn.

"Another name is engraved right above his heart in the same delicate font as Yul’s: Seol." Yup, I actually winced when I read this. These themes really are subtle, but they still hit just as strong.

"With watery eyes and warbled lips, Yul blinks at Jungkook, heartbroken and confused as to why he didn’t make that funny noise she loves so much. Quickly, her gaze averts to her chunky legs, swinging aimlessly as she attempts to hold back the tears." The cutest!!!!

"Today seems to be putting your mental strength to the test because Jungkook is dressed in baggy gray sweats, long dark hair slicked back into a ponytail. A few loose strands dangle devilishly in front of his eyes, taunting you." Not that look 😩😩😩

"See, you’ve always known Yul was a daddy’s girl. On good days, the toddler would grab you by the hand and guide you around the house, giving you a tour of everything that belonged to her father. His shoes at the door. His coat on the hook. Even taking you into the bathroom to show you his shampoo bottle. But that fact was never more apparent than now, as Yul stands in the middle of the living room on the verge of tears." This will always have me 🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺. It's literally the most adorable thing I've ever read.

“Yesh.” Plopping right onto her butt, she takes the other one off, repeating the process. “Like this!” Her arms stretch out and she clenches her two little front teeth, executing the most stellar charade of a light you’ve ever seen." Literally kicking my blanket right now because of all of this cuteness.

“How was she?” You didn’t even hear him come out of his office, so the deep voice makes you jump, eyes tracking the sound. He’s leaning against a kitchen counter, one tattooed hand stuffed in his pocket and the other wrapped around a water bottle. It’s a thick one too, and his fingers still touch." 😳😳😳😳😳

"Your fingers dance across the red cover, concealing hundreds of pages of isolation, emptiness, and the heavy dread of passing time. What an awful thing to relate to. Sometimes, when you get too engrossed in the text, glimmers of yourself bleed within the lines too." I don't know if the fact that they're similar in this regard makes things better of worse tbh.

“You can borrow something if you’d like. Does anything catch your eye?” Plopping down onto the computer chair, Jungkook rummages through his desk drawer and pulls out a tiny black case. You didn’t even know he wore glasses, and when he nudges them comfily onto the bridge of his nose, you nearly melt. As if he could get any more attractive." Any time the glasses come out I - AAAAAAH.

“Maybe,” you respond in the same lighthearted manner, feeling a bit more comfortable in his presence, “I also didn’t expect your room to look like a little boy’s room.” This time I aggressively winced when I read this.

"Cautiously, with your hand still on the tattoo, you whisper: “He must’ve been so beautiful, Jungkook…” 😭😭😭 She's really really trying to get to him and he's really really not letting her.

"You take a shaky breath, eyes shifting to the car floor, the air fresher on his mirror, the window. Anywhere but him. The way Jungkook explains your make-believe future together is nothing how you envisioned it. Maybe he’s right. Maybe he’s just a fucking asshole. Neither thought process eases the pain." Everything about this argument hurts a lot. They're both in such emotional and hard positions…. it just hurts.

“I’m not worth your tears, __.” I kind of agree with him tbh...

"Deep down, you know this isn’t going to be the last weekend you spend with Jungkook." She is in way too deep, with the way she's seeing glimpses of hope in every little thing, no wonder she's not ready to let go yet. The cynic in me tells me that Jungkook wouldn't be willing to change his mind though.

I have to repeat myself from the beginning but GOD KIKI!!!!! You've really created something special here. I was so sucked into this story that I could feel my breaths speeding up or deepening depending on what part I was reading.

Yul is just my favourite character ever now and you've given me baby fever when I'm not even sure if I want to have kids. And the way Jungkook was with her, the way he needed her for his own personal reasons makes my heart hurt every time I think about it.

There were so many subtle things in all of the scenes that I definitely feel like I'll read this again a few times after I process all of these emotions lmao. A lot of them really made me stop and think and yet I haven't been able to properly comment on them here 😔😔😔 I have so many thoughts and no words to be able to express them currently.

Also when you asked if we liked long smut scenes? Yeah, my answer now is a bigger yes than ever before, that shit was a masterpiece in itself and the more serious, symbolic parts were so well incorporated.

Don't let my thirst for dilf JK fool you though, I definitely don't love him too much. I just think you've managed to make it so that we have quite an objective view of both of their characters. And so I feel bad for both of them, but they also both annoy me in some ways too. It was just nice to not be told which characters we're supposed to like and therefore excuse their terrible decisions too. Both of them are pretty messed up in their own ways and there was both no judgement but also no glorification in the way you wrote them.

The sadness and angst were definitely present all the way throughout the story and they built up so well to the culmination, I definitely felt so many conflicting emotions at seeing the pain on both sides for different but fairly acceptable reasons.

And the ending... I would like to think that eventually they will both let go of each other and try to work on themselves and be happier, but I feel like that definitely won't happen before they cause each other some more pain ☹☹☹

Overall I still can't wrap my head around how incredible this was and it'll be occupying my mind for a while.

the weekend | jjk

⇢ PAIRING: dilf!jk x babysitter reader

⇢ RATING/GENRE: m/18+ | fwb, sm*t, angst

⇢ WC: 13.8k

⇢ WARNINGS: alright boyz strap in bc it's a doozy lmao, protected s*x, multiple org*sms (m & f), or*l s*x (m receiving), face f*ck, f*ngering, rough s*x, face slapping, sp*nking, exh*bitionism, sir k*nk, t*tty f*ck, t*tty sucking (duh), body piercings (n*pples), age gap (reader is 23 and jk is like 30), infid*lity (reader is the other woman), ch*king, overst*mulation, sp*tting, man handling, finger s*cking, d*m jk, brief mentions of past add*ction, implied passing of a bby (mainly subtext w no details given), maybe unrequited love, maybe not (EVIL CACKLE), some dark thoughts discussed (nothing too graphic or detailed), fighting n yelling n crying yikes, all of these characters are v flawed (except for yul duh), cute bby moments!!, oc is v immature n naive n contradicts herself a lot, she maybe has a thing for older guys bc of that, some bl*od (just a scrape on the knee but ik bl*od can be triggering), this relationship is extremely toxic and not meant to be desired!!!, one homage to trixie mattel lmao

⇢ SUMMARY: every weekend, you give jungkook a little taste of something he’s missing monday through friday.

⇢ NOTES: so after months and months of planning this fic (i literally posted the teaser in JANUARY UM??), it's finally here. i think this is my fav thing i've written thus far and i worked v hard on this! would love to know ur thoughts, feedback is always appreciated!! ty @/taegularities for betaing!! (for whatever reason, this fic refuses to show up in tags n it sucks n nothing i do fixes it so i shall leave it be lol)

You can't tell what’s louder—the crunch of dewy, end-of-summer grass pricking the soft skin of your thighs like angry thorns, or the cracking of bones as your body thumps to the ground from your bedroom window. 

“Ah-” the whine is quickly stifled by a sharp hiss as you remember your dad’s sleeping figure is just behind the wall next to you. “Ouch,” you whimper, praying that the crash hasn’t reached his watchful ears. Carefully, you climb to your feet, brushing the dirt off your bare legs. You spot a fresh crimson scrape on your knee.

Fucking great. 

Finally, after days of longing and waiting, the weekend has arrived. Today, in particular, is a fantastic day. You were trying to look sexy, and blood isn't exactly the sexiest accessory. Bringing your wrist up to your nose, you inhale the candy-scented liquid you had doused yourself in before leaving. 

Perfume still in check, thank fuck.

Goosebumps form on your skin as you take long, dutiful strides, cool night mist gliding through the thin material of your long silk shirt. You’ve committed this path to memory—out the window, usually in a more graceful manner, through the neighbor’s yard, and then straight down the sidewalk to the black Mercedes Benz waiting for you at the end of the road. 

If you hadn’t done this a million and one times already, you might’ve missed the vehicle, so dark that it blends into the night seamlessly. You can’t help but wonder if that’s his goal entirely. 

Still, the excitement of it all makes you walk a little faster. 

“Hey, Jungkook,” you smile as you slide into his black leather passenger seat, leaning over the center console to give his cheek a gentle peck. Maybe you’ve overstepped a boundary and muddied the lines in the sand of your… relationship, but you can’t help yourself. Seeing Jungkook was always a treat, one you looked forward to every Friday night for the past five months.

“Hi,” he says impassively, eyes darting over your figure. A loose strand of hair dangles in front of his eyes, teasing you. “You’re wearing makeup?”

“Oh, um…” You’re at a loss for words; surprised he noticed such a slight change in your appearance. Although his perceptiveness was something you noted shortly after you began working for him, you can’t help but feel flustered. “Yeah, I… wanted to look nice tonight. Totally busted my ass climbing out the window,” you laugh.

“Did you get hurt?” His straight brows furrow slightly, silver piercing reflecting the moonlight. 

“Just a scratch.” You lift your leg to show him the red mark on your knee. “Didn’t break anything, though, so that’s a plus.”

Wordlessly, Jungkook reaches over, popping open the glove compartment before you and pulling out the first aid kit he keeps there for emergencies. The scent of clean linen wafts over you from his daily cologne. His scent. Only his. You try your best to subdue the possessive smirk forming. “You should be more careful.”

“I’m okay.”

“Be more careful,” he commands, peering up at you with an icy gaze. “Got it?”

Whether it’s the seven-year age gap between the two of you or the tone of his voice, you know better than to argue. “Yes,” you wince as he rubs Neosporin onto the open wound. “Besides, I wouldn’t have gotten hurt if my dad wasn’t so… overprotective.”

“Well,” he continues, sticking a pink Baby Shark bandaid to your skin before putting the box back, “as a father, I understand.”

“Yul is two, though,” you laugh, “I’m in my twenties.”

“Being in your early twenties hardly makes you an adult,” he mutters. "Besides, it doesn't matter. The need to protect your children always stays the same.”

“Poor Bunny,” you pout jokingly as you click your seatbelt on. “She’s going to be just like me when she’s older. Sneaking out of a window to see a boy because her daddy is a big grizzly bear.”

The comment has his nose twitching in irritation. “I’m done with this conversation, __.”

You freeze. Have you struck a nerve?

“Jungkook, I’m sorry,” you peep. “I didn’t mean to-”

“Stop.” His voice is flat, but your heart thumps. “It’s fine.”

All the excitement you feel suddenly morphs into an uncomfortable ache as you slump into your seat. It’s different than it was last weekend, positioned much closer to the dashboard than you would ever put it. There’s a claustrophobic sting in your chest as you realize someone else has been in this very spot. 

You know they have, and you know who. 

The deafening sound of the bulky silver band on his finger, tapping against the steering wheel as he begins driving to the hotel you frequent, is a sick reminder.

You swear there’s even a musky floral scent lingering in the air. Deeper and more mature than yours. It could be paranoia, or guilt, making you imagine things. Still, you hope your perfume finds its way into every fiber of his leather seats. 

“How was your day?” Jungkook asks, interrupting any rational thought or doubt, luring you back into the vicious cycle. 

“A bit stressful,” you sigh. “I applied for school today.”

“That’s good.”

“Yeah, pretty sure I messed up on the financial aid paperwork, though. It was super confusing; I didn’t understand any of it.”

“You should’ve brought it over. I could’ve helped you.” 

Jungkook does have a master’s degree in finance. He could’ve been your Rosetta Stone, helping you decipher convoluted questions about taxes and deductions. However, you weren’t sure how he would’ve reacted to you pulling out your laptop post-sex, asking for assistance on something completely unrelated to your normal routine. “That’s not the type of thing we usually do when we’re together,” you shrug, “you know?”

Your response has him shifting in his spot, pierced bottom lip curling inwards like the words made him queasy. He was the one who encouraged you to go back to school in the first place. “I wouldn’t have minded,” Jungkook mumbles before quickly redirecting the dialogue, something he does whenever he’s frustrated or uncomfortable. “So, what’s the special occasion?” 

“Huh?” 

“What’s got you all dolled up?”

Oh, right. That special occasion. The one you’ve been anticipating since you were made aware of its existence. 

“Happy three years sober!” You announce with a cheesy smile, throwing your arms up eagerly. 

“Ah,” he huffs in recognition. His eyes are fixed on the road, but there’s the tiniest hint of a smirk on his face. Success. It takes everything in you not to physically rejoice. “I’m surprised you remembered.”

“What do you mean?” You ask with a pout. “How could I forget?”

“I don’t know.” Just like that, the flicker of happiness wisps away like a flame in the wind as his expression turns emotionless and stoic again. “It’s not really a big deal.”

You frown. Must he always be so… cold? 

‘It’s okay to smile; you deserve it,’ is what you want to tell him. It's not your place, though. You opt for: “It’s a huge deal, Jungkook,” instead. Reaching over, you gently tuck the stray strand of hair behind his decorated ear. 

A somber aura hangs around him like a dark, dreary rain cloud, and in moments like this, when it’s so visible, you just… need to touch him.

It’s stupid to think that you’re the special one; that you’ll be the girl to turn the rain into a rainbow and save him from himself, but you can’t refrain from trying. 

“Did you celebrate?”

He shakes his head. “Went to work.” 

You can tell from his outfit—a sleek black blazer resting neatly on top of an even darker button-up and tie. His long hair is slicked back, but gravity, and his ten-hour long shift took their toll, making the strands hang slack, short undercut peaking through. He looks so incredibly sexy. Maybe, you can comfort him in the only way you know how…

“Well, there’s still time.” You point to the clock on his touchscreen stereo: 11:12 p.m. You throw your hair over your shoulder before slowly undoing the top two buttons of your shirt, revealing the skimpy black lingerie set you splurged on just for tonight. Just for him. “We can celebrate…”

“Yeah?” His cheek bubbles, tongue poking at the inside of his mouth, eyebrow jumping at your suggestion. “How so?”

You bite your lip, contemplating your next move. Hastily, you unbuckle your seatbelt and lean over the center console. It’s reckless, but so is being with a man like Jungkook. When you finally get to have him the way you want, you’re incapable of rationality. 

One night of him isn’t enough. What kind of tease is that? You need at least six more to be satisfied…

“__,” he warns, arching his head away from your sneaky lips.  “Put your seatbelt on. Wait until we get to the hotel.”

“Where’s the fun in that, though?” You pout, cupping his cheek in your hand and batting your eyelashes innocently. Jungkook doesn’t take the bait, giving the desolate road ahead his unwavering attention. Despite his nonchalant demeanor, you can tell you’re getting to him. Below you, his slacks tighten around his thick, tensed thighs. He’s playing right into your hands. Needily, you tongue the little silver hoops dangling from his ear. 

“If I have to pull over, you’re in trouble.”

“Maybe I-”

A hushed ‘fuck’ cuts you off as the car comes to a screeching halt. Jungkook slams on the brakes, coming too close to the slower vehicle in front of you for comfort. Luckily, his dad reflexes kick in. His strong hand grips your waist tightly, preventing you from barreling forward. You brace yourself by clutching his shoulders, and when the adrenaline rush fades, you finally look at him. His nostrils are flared, and his jaw is clenched painfully tight. He’s pissed. 

You know you should apologize, or be a little shaken up, but the blinking of the turn signal as he pulls to the side of the dark highway has your mouth watering. This is just what you wanted. 

Jungkook sighs in frustration, tilting his head back against the headrest. The movement is counterintuitive, exposing the inked canvas of his neck that you’re desperate to paint red and purple. 

A hand fists your tangled hair, pulling you off with a harsh yank before you have the chance to sink your teeth in. The silver ring on his finger digs into your scalp like a knife. “Do not fucking mark me.”

The feeling of the frigid metal is agonizing. Not physically—his grip loosens immediately after the initial tug—but emotionally. You know why he doesn’t want you to mark him. Any evidence of you, other than your weekly babysitting duties, would unravel the entire life he’s built for himself. 

Jungkook is an intelligent man, though. You don’t have to tell him that it’s all a façade, and everything’s already been undone. 

“I’m sorry.” Your voice comes out frail and shaky. “I just want you.”

And like some cruel joke, his phone rings. 

The contact image would typically make you swoon. It’s a picture of him and his daughter from her first birthday party; her sticky, strawberry ice cream covered hands holding his cheeks as he stares at her with scrunched eyes and a big smile. You think that picture is the only time you’ve ever seen him genuinely happy.

The bold, white font at the top of the screen makes you sick to your stomach. 

‘Wife.’

Jungkook releases your hair and places a finger over his mouth, signaling you to shut up,  before answering. 

“Yes, Seulgi?”

“Your daughter would like to speak to you.” 

Her voice makes you want to curl into yourself. Whenever you talk to Seulgi regarding Yul, you’re able to compartmentalize and detach that part of yourself from this one. The one that’s sleeping with her husband. Hearing her in this compromised setting makes you feel absolutely repulsive. 

After some rustling and tiny sniffles, Yul answers. “Da-” She only manages a syllable before breaking into a cry-induced coughing fit. You cringe, poor Bunny. “Daddy!”

“What’s wrong with my baby?”

You don’t mean to giggle, especially when the little girl you’ve grown to love so much is clearly distressed, but the intimidating, grumpy, tattooed businessman beside you, talking in full-on pout, tickles your brain just right.

“I don’t wanna sleep alone!” Yul screeches in the most anguished, high-pitched tone.

“Bunny…” With the way his hands scrub down his face, you can tell the tears on the other end are physically affecting him. “Take a deep breath, please.”

There’s a shaky inhale, and a sad whine of an exhale as she tries to steady her respirations.

“Thank you, good job,” he affirms. “Yul, daddy is…” Dark pupils flicker over to you, his face scowled to match. He eyes you like you’re an annoying stain on his leather seat. A dirty little secret that’s keeping him from his daughter. The gesture sends a dagger through your chest. Usually, Jungkook tells his wife he’s working overtime, but he can’t bring himself to lie to his only daughter. “Busy.”

“B-B-But.” The wails have simmered down to a blubber. “Scared.”

“You have mommy, though, don’t you?” He counters exasperatedly, cogs turning at maximum speed to conjure up a solution. “And Ruru?”

Yul is a persistent girl. You’ve seen the two-and-a-half-year-old deadpan Jungkook with a ‘you can have them, then,’ when he tried to convince her that vegetables were delicious and totally not an abomination to tastebuds. “Jeon Ruru is scared, too.”

After a few months of dedication and trust building, Yul finally initiated you into her inner circle of squishmallows, all of which shared the surname, Jeon, followed by whatever random title her baby brain bestowed them. Jeon Ruru, a glass of strawberry milk, was her favorite. You coo in remembrance. 

“What about Ado?” Jungkook suggests, exhausting all his options.

“Ado?” She peeps curiously, and you can almost see her doe eyes scanning the room for her runner-up, an avocado squishmallow you gifted her. “Ado’s sleepin’.”

“Can you go get him?”

There’s a long pause of contemplation before the pitter-patter of tiny feet on wood fills the speakers. “Jeon Ado!” She calls out, voice becoming distant as she runs to her bedroom, “daddy wantsa’ talk to you!” You make out a quiet ‘I’ll tuck you in’ when Seulgi helps her to bed. “Okay,” Yul huffs, breathless from her scurry down the long corridor, “he’s here.”

“Jeon Ado.” You rarely see this side of him, and it takes all of your strength to suppress the smile that’s creeping up. “Can you keep Yul safe while I’m away?” He even leans forward a bit, turning his ear towards the speaker as if he’s actually waiting for the stuffed avocado to answer, subconsciously playing along with his daughter despite being miles apart. The scene puts your overwhelmingly sweet perfume to shame. “Uh, Yul, he said yes. So can you sleep in your big girl bed tonight?”

Reluctantly, Yul grumbles in agreement.

“Alright baby, goodnight. I’ll see you in the morning, okay?” 

Again, she answers with a little grunt and a yawn.

“I love you.”

“Love youuu!” She extends the vowel for emphasis.

“I love you more.”

There’s a beat of silence before the sleepy girl simply responds ‘yep,’ not even attempting to argue. He glances at you, this time with a wholesome smile, eyes warm with burning stars. It’s moments like this that keep you hooked, you think. Like always, the feeling is short-lived. When Seulgi mumbles a sweet goodnight to her daughter, their daughter, you’re reminded that you shouldn’t even be observing this domestic interaction. 

“You know,” the man begins, turning his attention to his wife, “if you had given her a warm bottle, she would’ve gone down without a hitch.” 

“Jungkook, she’s too old for a bottle.” And just like that, the fire between them ignites. You’ve never actually witnessed the pair fighting, only felt the uncomfortable heat between them in passing. “And she’s too old to be co-sleeping. She never had an issue sleeping alone beforehand.”

“Alright,” he asserts, “if Yul’s okay, then we’re done here.”

“Don’t you think it’s a little unfair?” Despite his warning, she continues. “Getting her used to sleeping with you and then not being here?”

There were many things about having a daughter that Jungkook wasn’t prepared for.

It’s not that he didn’t do his research, and Yul certainly wasn’t an accident. He had wanted her more than anything. Especially after the… 

Incident.

A baby-sized hole was left in Jungkook’s chest. Every day, it grew bigger and bigger until, eventually, that bitter emptiness would’ve swallowed him alive. 

Jungkook needed Yul. 

Still, there were certain things that parenting books and videos hadn’t warned him about, like the worry in his stomach whenever his daughter refuses her lunch, or the ache in his heart when he drops her off at daycare and she watches him leave through the window with a sad wave and tears rolling down her cheeks as if he’s just abandoned her forever. As if he or his wife aren’t going to pick her up in a mere four hours like they do every Tuesday and Thursday. His readings haven’t prepared him for the even stronger ache that consumes his entire body whenever he leaves for work too early and comes home too late, with barely any time to spend with his favorite person in the world.  

Before Yul was even born, Jungkook and Seulgi had decided that co-sleeping was out of the question. Their room was for them, and he stood firm on that principle for a while. However, as time passed, their room became Seulgi’s, and the empty bedroom downstairs became his. 

Jungkook couldn’t stand that room. 

One night, after a particularly grueling shift, Jungkook trudges up the stairs for a late shower. Without finance talk or Yul’s babbles, he’s left to his own thoughts. Usually, under the scalding water, he wondered how his life turned out this way, or more so, why? This time, Jungkook wonders if there is even a reason to keep going at all.

He catches his reflection while brushing his teeth. His eyes are dark, cold, distant. Those same eyes belong to his daughter, but all he sees when looking into hers is love, innocence, and everything good in life. 

Maybe, just maybe, there’s hope for him. 

Taking a detour to Yul’s room, Jungkook does his best to quietly tip-toe around squishmallows and discarded markers. Underneath the pink blanket is a little ball of fluffy black hair. She’s got her thumb in her mouth—a bad habit he and Seulgi had been trying to nip in the bud—with her chubby cheeks squished against her pillow. There were few things he hated more than waking her up, especially when she was sleeping so peacefully, but for whatever reason, he couldn’t stop himself. 

Tiny, confused cries fill the room as Jungkook scoops her up. 

“Shh,” he hushes, smoothing his palm over her onesie-clad back. “It’s just me.”

“Da- ddy?” Immediately, she relaxes at the familiar sound of his voice, words slurred as she rubs the sleep out of her eyes with a little fist before peering up at him with big marble eyes. 

“How was daycare, Bunny?” 

“Scared,” she whimpers, slumping into his chest for comfort. “Scaredy cat.”

“Scaredy cat?” Jungkook repeats, trying to make sense of the phrase. “Who’s a scaredy cat?”

“Jeon Yul.” 

Typically, Jungkook finds it adorable when Yul refers to herself in the third person. The way she says it this time makes him frown. “Jeon Yul is not a scaredy cat. Jeon Yul is a baby, that’s all.” Realizing that she’d probably heard the unfavorable title at daycare, his chest tightens. With a heavy sigh, he rests his chin on top of her round head, swaying back and forth. Her hair smells like green apples from her baby soap. “Why were you scared, sweetheart?”

“No color…” 

On his lunch break, Seulgi informed him that she was picking Yul up early. In an attempt to encourage her to engage with other children, the teacher took away Yul’s crayons, sending her into a full-blown tantrum. Jungkook knew his daughter well, a spitting image of him in every capacity. The crayons weren’t the problem; it was that crippling shyness that made her afraid of socializing with nearly anyone other than you and her parents.

Her back ripples with tiny hiccups as she recounts the events. Jungkook decides it’s best to change the subject, not wanting to upset his two-year-old anymore—especially this late at night. 

“Guess what?”

Yul grunts an inquisitive noise.

“Daddy got you Baby Shark coloring books.”

Her wispy bedhead bounces as she glances side to side, inspecting her room for any sign of new Pinkfong merchandise. Jungkook was genuinely amazed at her ability to keep track of it all, considering how much he and his wife loved to spoil her rotten. However, the word ‘rotten’ doesn’t even come close to describing his baby. “Where?”

“In my car,” he laughs, slicking her choppy bangs out of her eyes. “We’ll color tomorrow., okay?”

“I like Baby Shark,” Yul says, completely ignoring his question. The teeniest, tiniest, most precious yawn slips out, two little front teeth on full display before her lips smack together sleepily. Truly living up to her nickname.

“I know you do.” He’s still rocking her gently, buying some time before she falls back into sleep’s arms and out of his. “I missed you so much today.” 

“Why?”

As of late, ‘why’ seems to be Yul’s favorite word. 

Why is the sky blue?

Why do vegetables taste yucky?

Why is daddy’s nose so big?

He’d be lying if he said that last, brutally honest question hadn’t caught him off guard when she first uttered it on his hip at the grocery store. 

“Because I love you.” It’s the most effortless sentence he’s ever spoken. The most natural feeling he’s ever felt.

“Why?” 

“Because,” his eye roll is disconnected from his growing smile, “you’re so cute!” If they weren’t enclosed by the four pink walls of Yul’s bedroom, Jungkook would be embarrassed at the squeakiness of his usual monotone voice. Leaning down, Jungkook blows a raspberry against her doughy cheek, a tried and true method of making her laugh. “Do you want to sleep in my room?”

It’s against his better judgment and the ground rules he had agreed to, but he just… really needs to spend time with her tonight. The small nod against his chest seals the deal. Before he gets to the door, Yul stops him with an exaggerated gasp.

“Daddy, Ruru!”

“Ruru?” 

She grunts, frustrated at her father’s confusion, frantically pointing at her partner in crime, the strawberry milk squishmallow lying neatly underneath her comforter. Just how she left it.

“Yul,” Jungkook starts, taking a few steps backward and bending at the waist, allowing her to take the oversized stuffie into her arms. “Isn’t this Mimi?” As far as Jungkook knows, the pink milk carton with a face had always been Mimi; a name Yul had dubbed it since he brought it home a couple months back.

“Ruru,” she states affirmatively. 

And ever since then, Yul’s been a co-sleeper. 

Jungkook prided himself on knowing his daughter like the back of his tattooed hand. Whether it’s a sixth sense, some innate father’s instinct that the parenting videos mentioned, or his own attention to detail, he could read her like a book. However, sharing a bed with the tiny human taught him something he had been blissfully unaware of:

Yul sleeps wild. 

More often than not, Jungkook was awoken by a tiny foot kicking his back, or by his own reflexes as he was somehow pushed to the very corner of the bed by his twenty-pound baby. There were even a few times when a harsh tug on his hair acted as an alarm clock. When he turned around to confront the culprit, however, she was fast asleep, arm slung over one of the many squishmallows that had worked their way into his room. 

Having her with him was worth all bald spots and bruises, though. It’s bad, he knows it, and night by night, Yul becomes more attached. Getting her acclimated to daycare had been hell, to say the least. He knows co-sleeping has possibly made her more reluctant to socialize than she already was. 

Still, Jungkook can’t help but wonder who’s more dependent on the other. When he thinks about it, undoubtedly, the answer is him. Because as long as he wakes up to a little foot in his back, a fist in his hair, and the smell of green apple baby soap, he has a reason to keep going. 

“Don’t you think she deserves better?”

Her sharp words swipe through the air like a blade. Even you feel the cut, cautiously eyeing Jungkook. You can’t read his expression, but something about it makes you rub a comforting hand over his shoulder. He doesn’t react to your touch at all.

There’s a sullen pause before he finally answers. “I think Yul deserves everything.”

“Right… Goodnight, Jungkook.” She hangs up before he has the chance to respond. Seulgi always struck you as a level-headed person, albeit a bit aloof, but never unfair or cruel. You assume she’s just being spiteful, because anyone who knows Jungkook would never question his dedication to his daughter. That ugly, bitter, jealous side of you thinks maybe she just doesn’t know him the way you do. 

“Are you okay?” You whisper as if approaching a wounded animal, ready to attack. 

“On Fridays,” he starts, eyes shamefully dropping to his fidgeting hands. “Yul spends the day with my parents.”

His incessant need to defend his parenting makes your heart ache. “Hey, I-”

“She’s usually asleep by the time I leave work.” 

“Kook,” you interrupt his rambling. “You don’t have to explain; I understand... I think you’re an amazing father.”

Lifting his head, Jungkook looks you directly in the eyes. His are glassy and gentle now, but the fingers that hook into your lace bra, right between the cups, are rough and abrasive. “C’mere,” he gruffs, pulling you over the center console until you’re uncomfortably sandwiched between his solid chest and the steering wheel. There’s no effort to make room for you; he doesn’t slide his seat back. He doesn’t compromise any of his space for you. You accept it, steadying yourself on his shoulders with a grunt. 

Sometimes, you question what your presence in his life truly is. Are you an escape or a punching bag? Are you merely something he can sink his nails and teeth into when angry? Something he can break without consequence? The sound of thread ripping and buttons popping fills the car as he slides the silk off your shoulders, letting the delicate material fall to the floor without a care in the world.

“You wore this for me?” A fingertip lightly traces the petite swell of your breasts, barely bulging over the frilly black cups of your push-up. The sensation sets your skin ablaze.

“Mhm,” you confirm, “I wanted today to be special.”

“You care about me?” Moonlight cuts through the dewy window, beaming against the side of his pale face, highlighting the taut pull in his features. His question seems genuine, but the answer is obvious, isn’t it? Simply being here with him makes the entire foundation of your soul, all of your morals and beliefs, crumble to pieces. Against your better judgment, you’re still here. 

Yearning. Trying. Fighting.

You swipe a thumb over his thick brows, trying to ease the angry crinkle that’s become a permanent fixture on his beautiful face. You comb through his hair. It’s a little knotted, a little crunchy from old gel. 

The answer should be obvious, but you don’t think Jungkook could internalize love if it was right in front of him.

“I care about you,” you say truthfully, “a lot.”

The stars in his eyes gleam for a moment, glowing bright and vibrant, before they’re engulfed by the suffocating blackness of his pupils. 

“You poor thing,” Jungkook tuts, trailing his fingers up your neck before grasping your jaw with a single hand. The baby fat of your cheeks mushes together from the force. “You're gonna let me do whatever I want to you, aren't you?”

The tone of his voice has your heart fluttering and your stomach churning with thick hot desire. Gripping his wrist with both hands, you moan out a ‘yes,’ unconsciously grinding down onto his slack-covered bulge. He’s barely touched you yet and your cunt is leaking, making a mess of your itty bitty thong and his work suit. 

“Right, of course.” With the same hand holding you, Jungkook taps his index finger against your glossy pout, “open.” Just barely parting your lips, you let the thick digit slide between them. Immediately, he presses down against your tongue, trying to coax a gag out of you. “What if I want to fuck this pretty little mouth until you cry? How does that sound? Would you like that?”

Inhaling deeply, you nod. That sounds absolutely perfect.

“I don’t know if you can handle it, though,” he lulls, retracting his finger before plunging it back in, all the up to his inked knuckle. You squint in defiance. He’s teasing, but you can’t fight the tinge of anger in your chest. If there’s one thing you can do, it’s suck a mean dick. Looking him directly in the eyes, you swirl your tongue against his palm with ease, not choking once. You feel his cock twitch against the supple flesh of your inner thigh. 

Unamused by your antics, Jungkook yanks his hand back angrily, making a string of saliva drip down your chin. Maybe a full face of makeup wasn’t the best idea. “Get in the backseat,” he orders huskily, wiping the damp skin on his blazer. Biting back a smirk, you climb off his lap and wriggle over the center console. You situate yourself on the cool leather, laying down and assuming face-fuck position. 

The yellow glow of headlights swims across the ceiling as a passing car drifts down the misty highway. This is the first time in five months that you and Jungkook are out in the open, blissfully oblivious to the possibility of getting caught. It’s childish, but you hope someone sees. For a moment in time—in a wandering eye’s glimpse of reality—you’re his and he's yours.

“Couldn’t wait until we got to the hotel, huh?” Jungkook huffs when he opens the door. Giddily, you lean your head back over the edge of the seat, coming face to face with the tent in his pants. His hands frantically work to unbuckle his belt, desperate to bury himself inside of you. His favorite escape. “Well, since you want to act like a fucking whore-” his pants fall to his knees with a clang when he unbuttons them, “-I’ll treat you like one.”

“Please,” you whimper, noting the wet spot on his gray Calvin Kleins. Reaching up, you lightly drag your nails across it, teasingly pinching the head of his cock before he tugs his boxers down. A big greedy smile spreads across your face as his semi springs out. 

The sight makes your lips part. It’s so pretty. Something about how the moonlight catches the glowy pink tip, peeking out from under his foreskin. The light accentuates every ridge and vein on his girthy shaft. So yummy it has you drooling-

Jungkook’s right. You’re a complete and utter whore.

“Is this what you wanted?” He peers down at you over his prominent nose, one hand clutching the roof of his Mercedes. The other wraps around his thick shaft, giving it a few languid pumps, getting himself fully erect for you. Teasingly, he taps the head against your plump lips. Unable to resist, you press a sweet peck and a kitten lick to his silky frenulum. “Uh-uh,” he chuckles, raising his delicious cock just beyond your reach. “You know better than that. Ask for permission.”

“Wanna suck it,” you pout, squirming impatiently. “Please?”

Suddenly, his heavy cock slaps your cheek with a wet thud.

“Please, what?”

“Please, sir?”

“Good girl.” The praise is contradicted by another light smack to your face, this time with an open palm. Taking the hint, you open your mouth wide, tongue sticking out in anticipation. Jungkook watches you intently with furrowed brows and a slack jaw as he feeds you the first few inches. As soon as the salty flavor of his arousal hits your tastebuds, you moan obnoxiously, back arching off the leather beneath you. 

He starts slowly, using your breathing to guide his movements—pausing on the exhales and giving you a bit more on the inhales. He does this until the entirety of his length is shoved down your warm, wet mouth. 

The hem of his black dress shirt flows over you, obstructing his view. He places it between his teeth with an annoyed groan, wanting to watch the swell in your neck as you swallow him like a snake. “You take it so well,” he grunts over the material, “the best I’ve ever had.”

Tears clinging to your lashes finally lose grip, trickling down your skin until they get lost in the thick, dark swoops of your dangling hair. For once, you mean something more to him than she does. It’s insignificant and shameful, but at least it's something.

“Are you okay, __?” Jungkook asks, sensing the shift as your soul splays before him like your half-naked body. Stepping back, he gives you some reprieve.

With red eyes and drool bubbling at the corners of your lips, you moan out an implied ‘yes.’ His confession has you on cloud nine.

“Do you remember the sign?”

Again, you hum. 

“Can you show me?”

Lazily, you tap his outer thigh three times, a hard ‘stop’ symbol you had agreed upon months ago while hanging off the edge of a hotel bed, preparing for Jungkook to fuck your mouth for the very first time. 

“Good girl,” he says before rutting his entire length into you again. He’s so deep that the soft skin of his scrotum nudges against the tip of your nose, and the dense patch of trimmed hair on his pubic bone tickles your chin. Reaching down, Jungkook grips your neck, reveling in the feeling of it stretching against his palm as he moves in and out steadily. 

Eventually, he hunches over, hands wandering down and holding your temples for better leverage. Despite the harsh digs of his hips, his delicate fingers brush away a few strands of hair stuck to your damp cheeks. The sweet gesture makes you whimper around him in pure ecstasy, moving your head to meet his thrusts for extra stimulation, circling your flat tongue around the base. 

The whistles of the midnight breeze and the murmur of passing cars fade, and all you hear is Jungkook. The melodic, venomous praises pouring out of him poison your mind with optimism. He takes one last plunge, so powerful it sends you sliding back against the seat. To steady yourself, you grip his legs, attempting to ease your triggered gag reflex. He holds you there, cock stuffed to the brim as he slams a hand against the black steel of his car, shirt falling from his teeth as he moans ardently. You gasp when he finally pulls out, leaking tip still connected to you by a bridge of spit and precum.

“Why-” Cough. “Why did you stop?” 

Your question is met with only the sound of rustling fabric and the chime of his hanging belt buckle as he removes his suit jacket and throws it into the passenger seat. Grabbing you by the band of your lingerie, Jungkook hauls your frame closer.

He snaps your taut bra strap against your shoulder with a single finger. “Take this off.”

“O-Okay,” you stutter, still trying to catch your breath as you sit up at the waist and unclip your bra. A shiver runs down your spine as the cool night air licks your exposed chest. This time when you lie down, you’re positioned under his spread legs. He stands over you with such authority and dominance. The underside view of his hard cock looks absolutely menacing. 

“These,” Jungkook’s large palms grab at your tits, jiggling them, “I wanna fuck ‘em.”

“There isn’t anything for you to fuck,” you giggle. 

After years of insecurity, and crying over vengeful comments from dumb boys you had broken things off with, you finally came to terms with your appearance. Your tits are small, and that’s okay. Plus, the cute little nipple piercings you had gotten a while back were definitely a confidence booster. There wasn’t an ounce of self-hatred in your comment.

Jungkook doesn’t take it that way, though.

“Shut up.” With a huff, he steps back and hunches, reaching down to deliver a harsh swat to your cheek. It was a little rougher than usual, and you wince upon impact. Instantly, he soothes the skin with a gentle pet. “Your tits are… perfect.”

Perfect? Your cheeks and aching pussy heat up at the compliment.

Squeezing your chest, Jungkook brushes his thumbs over your pebbled nipples. He pays extra attention to the silver barbells, decorated with little sparkly peaches at the ends. “These are new,” he notes, tugging on the jewelry. You let out a breathy moan, legs clenching together, inner thighs embarrassingly wet. “Sheesh,” he laughs, “someone’s sensitive.”

“Yeah… keep going.”

“I like them. They’re cute on you.”

Throughout your acquaintances, Jungkook was rarely this vocal. Maybe some praise sprinkled in here and there, but seldom anything substantial. Tonight, however, he’s been dishing out sweet talk like candy. You can’t pinpoint precisely what, but something’s changed.

Whatever it is, it fills you with awful, wishful hope.

Jungkook shuffles closer, teasing the teat of your pierced bud with his sticky tip. The dreamy sensation has your eyes rolling back into your skull. A glob of spit drops between the valley of your breasts before he spreads the wetness over your skin with his shaft. He has to use a death grip to force your tits into a soft plushness, perfect for him to slot himself into. Again, you feel that fucking ring embedding itself into your skin like a nasty tick. 

Cautiously, he guides his pulsing cock between your constrained breasts. A beautiful symphony of groans lulls out as he throws his head back in pleasure, long locks dancing along his clammy neck. 

“You like that?” You hum, taunting him. “Tell me how it feels.”

It takes him a minute to collect his thoughts, eyes trained on your tits pillowing around him, focusing on the dewy sheen of your nipples and chest as his oozing cock spills onto your skin. “It feels-” his hips stutter, “-so fucking good.”

The way his teeth snarl around the hushed curse makes you smile, eyes closing as you relish in his pleasure. Maybe you’re too horny, or perhaps the blood rushing to your head from being upside down for so long is making you crazy, but you wish you could live in this moment forever. Wallowing in the darkness, frozen in time with him. Yeah, you think, that would be wonderful.

“You can touch yourself,” he comments, spotting your clenched legs, desperate for some pressure. 

“S’okay,” you mumble, reaching around to caress his balls. His thighs tremble a bit against your arms. “Just wanna make you feel good.”

“Can you-” he grunts, stomach clenching as he begins to feel that familiar pooling in the base of his thick shaft. “Hold them for me. I’ll take care of you after, just- let me cum.”

Obliging, you replace his hands with your own, squishing your tits together for him. The visual of you lying under him, complacent and willing, sends him spiraling. A guttural roar echoes throughout the empty road as he speeds up. “Tighter,” he orders; you listen. The saliva and precum are beginning to rub off, making the friction of his chaotic thrusts sting your skin. He notices, letting another string of spit fall from his mouth onto your flesh. “Be good and take it. I’m almost there.”

By now, Jungkook should know you’d endure any pain to be with him. 

The darkest parts of your brain tell you he’s well aware of that fact. 

After a few more humps and lulled words of encouragement, he’s bursting at the seams. Just before he blows, Jungkook steps back, tight fist jerking himself frantically as he spills his seed onto your chest. Your eyes dart from his red, angry cock to his fucked out expressions. The moonlight shines behind him like a glowing aura as he finishes with a scrunched nose and his tongue between his teeth. He looks angelic. You moan under him, flinching when a stray spurt lands on your chin. 

Fucked out and dazed, he laughs softly, running a hand through his hair as his chest heaves. Collecting the liquid with his finger, he brings it to your giggling lips. The taste makes you hum as you lazily begin rubbing his cum all over your tits. 

“Really?” He asks with a raised eyebrow. “You’re already starting?”

“Starting what?” You pout, batting your lashes at him and circling your nipple lightly with the tip of your nail, trying your best to look oblivious and innocent. Well, as innocent as you possibly can while literally covered in sperm. 

“Don’t play dumb. You know what you’re doing.”

See, in many ways, Jungkook is different from any other guy you’ve been with prior. For one, you didn’t meet via horny messages on Tinder at 1 a.m. For two, he’s older, meaning he’s much more intelligent and much more experienced. After years and years of honing in on his craft, he just knows how to fuck. Jungkook is one of the rare few penis-havers in the world who can orgasm back to back; no refractory period necessary. Truly a hidden gem. 

To put it simply, the man is a fucking faucet—one that you can turn off and on whenever you want. 

As if on cue, Jungkook twirls his inked finger, indicating for you to turn around. The other hand squeezes his cock just below the crown to cut off circulation, keeping himself erect. With that, your white converses are planted flat onto the sparse grass as you bend over the back seat, leaning your weight on your elbows. 

It's like whiplash when Jungkook's aggressive persona drops, and he's running his hands all over your body. Up your thighs, over your back, down your arms. He blooms petal-soft kisses on your bare shoulder before whispering in your ear. “Can I go in like this? Or do you need some foreplay?”

“This is fine,” you murmur, jarred by his sudden tenderness. “Perfect, actually.” 

With a hushed ‘alright,’ Jungkook reaches over you to rummage through the pocket of his discarded blazer. A heavy sigh escapes your lips as he pulls out a square foil packet. Condoms were an unwavering constant in your weekend escapades. Jungkook always wears condoms. Normally, that would be a great thing; however, in this situation, it’s like a stab to the heart…

Because if he’s adamant about using protection with you, then that means he’s still sleeping with her, doesn’t it? And it’s not like you can even ask or scold him about it. She’s his wife, after all. You’re the outsider. 

Jungkook hooks his thumb into your panties and pulls them aside. Your glistening folds are on full display, waiting to get pounded mercilessly right on the side of the road. He shoves three digits into your mouth, letting your drool on them a bit before pressing them to your wet cunt. Opening your folds with his index and ring fingers, he lightly dips the middle inside you. He collects some arousal and spreads it to your clit in feathery flicking motions. You cry out, feeling the shocks of a blossoming orgasm. 

“Already dripping, I see.” You can practically hear his cocky, satisfied grin as he stands straight and rolls the condom down his length. “Always so sensitive.”

“Mhm,” you nod frantically, “I always get like this with you.”

“I know you do.” Pulling a cheek to the side, Jungkook cards his sheathed tip through your entrance, making sure to nudge under your clitoral hood with every swipe. Lewd wet sounds ring in your ears as he tortures your hole relentlessly. 

“Kook,” you huff, reaching back to dig your manicured, almond-shaped nails into his skin. “Just put it in!”

Suddenly, Jungkook slams your torso onto the leather. In one swift motion, he’s catching your wrists, pinning them both to your lower back with a single hand. 

“I’ll give you what you want just-” releasing the back of your neck, he spanks you so hard you recoil, “be patient.”

Despite his words, you wait no longer than a minute before he’s guiding his dreamy member right where you want it. Jungkook always gives in quickly. How could he not when you’re ass up, face down, and practically begging? As he sinks into you, and you feel that familiar burn from the initial stretch, your eyes roll back, mouth opening around a silent scream. 

Usually, Jungkook likes to overwhelm you with his entire length all at once. There’s some hesitation this time as he slides in only halfway before stopping. Too much hesitation for your liking. You’re confident he’s testing you. Your assumption is verified when he speaks in that annoying, condescending voice.

“If you want it so bad, come get it.”

“You’re so,” breaking free from his grasp, you press your palms into the seat and lift yourself up with a grumble, “infuriating.”

He hums halfheartedly, head dropping to watch you work yourself onto him. Only a single stroke in, and he can already see you coating him in a shiny, milky dew. “So fucking wet…”

“Can’t help it,” you peep, taking him to the hilt and circling your hips, trying to savor the feeling. You’re no stranger to his cock; how good it makes you feel. You spend every Friday night bathing in that pleasure, forgoing parties and hangouts with your best friends for a romp in the five-star hotel sheets with Jungkook. Still, you squeeze your eyes shut, trying to commit his touch to memory. Perhaps, despite your denial, you recognize that this is temporary. Deep down, you know that someday, all you’ll have left of him is a tragic echo. “I love the way you make me feel.”

“Me too,” he gasps, guiding your movements as his fingers dig into your hips. Clearly interpreting your admission differently than you had meant it. “Your pussy’s like heaven.” 

High on praise and drunk on the sounds you’re coaxing out of him, you whine, dragging your cunt up every inch of his throbbing length before slamming back. Hopefully, the dense forest behind you is enough to insulate the pornographic wails ripping through you. Even if someone somewhere hears, you can’t bring yourself to give a damn. Not when heady pleasure and adrenaline course through your veins like blood. 

Just when you’re about to collapse, arms giving out underneath you, Jungkook grabs you by the neck and holds you flush against his toned chest. “Don’t you run,” he chuckles. The low baritone rumble goes straight to your clit. His warm breath gusts over your skin, contrasting the chilly night air. “Don’t give up on me.”

He’s pounding into you now, choking you tighter than he ever has, but he pecks you so delicately. Lips barely ghosting over the shell of your ear. So gentle and tender. As tears stream down your cheeks for the second time tonight, you can’t help but feel there’s a hidden meaning behind his words.

“What’s wrong?” He smirks, tilting your face, wanting you to look him in the eye as you fall apart. The visual nearly makes you combust. His stringy hair is sticking to his cheeks, flushed from exertion. Even the tattoos littering the expanse of his neck are splotched pink and red. Twisting in his hold, you grab a fistful of his damp waves, fingers tickling his short undercut. “What do you want, baby?”

“Cum…”

“You wanna cum?”

“Please, please, please.” Weak whimpers punch out of you in tandem with his brutal thrusts.

“What do you say?”

“Please, sir?”

“Good girl,” he rewards you with a smack to your sensitive clit, “you can cum. I’ve got you.”

And with his permission, you’re cumming. Your legs shake violently as you’re overcome with blinding, electric gratification. If it wasn’t for Jungkook’s strong arms supporting you, you would’ve toppled face-first into the seat. He fucks you through the height of your orgasm; hips never ceasing, even when everything becomes so intense and sensitive that your body instinctively tries to push him away. He watches your face intently, reading your expressions to ensure he’s milked every last drop of your orgasm before he lets you fall onto the leather.

Even in your hazy state, you catch the breathy string of curses, a telltale sign of his own impending orgasm. “Fuck!” He groans, removing the condom to paint your ass and lower back in hot, white ropes. 

It’s funny, really. 

He refuses to cum with you or inside you, something so intimate and special, but he has no qualms cumming on you. It’s almost like he’s marking you, burning himself into your flesh. Consuming a piece of you every time your bodies come together as one. 

And all the while, his mind is somewhere else as his body swallows you alive. 

“Look at you,” Jungkook laughs, smoothing a palm up and down your spine, rubbing his semen into your skin the same way you had earlier. “I’ve made a mess out of you.” 

That’s true in more ways than one…

Lost in post-nut clarity, your brain barely registers Jungkook maneuvering you both into the car. Closing the door behind him, he moves you onto his lap, your back pressed against his sweaty button-up. Peering down, you see his slacks and boxers still around his ankles, black dress shoes poking out underneath. You’re in only a thong and sneakers, and your makeup is definitely melted. The two of you must look like the biggest sluts ever.

“What’s so funny?” Jungkook mutters, noticing your delirious giggles. 

“Oh, nothing,” you hum, leaning into him. Habitually, he wraps both of his inked arms around your middle. You despise how incredibly natural and serendipitous it feels, almost like you’re meant to be in them.

God __, get your head out of the clouds and return to Earth. 

Life isn’t a romance novel, and you’re not a child anymore. You shouldn’t see the world as quartz-colored and magical. The man is seven years older than you. He has a wife and child. Logistically, it could never, ever work…

But if soulmates exist as they do in the books, you wish on every falling star that Jungkook is yours.

“What are you thinking about?” You coo softly, turning your head to stare into the abyss of his infinite eyes.

Like a moth drawn to a flame, he can’t resist lowering his sinful hand to your most private area, cupping your sex unabashedly. “I want more.”

“You always want more.” 

“So do you,” he laughs, pointing out the way you grind into his touch. Nuzzling into your shoulder, he nips your skin and then soothes his tongue over it like an insincere apology. “Just one more time, okay?”

You nod, head leaning back on his shoulder as you succumb to his skilled fingers, rubbing your clit in tight circles. Jungkook pauses in contemplation before popping his glistening fingers into his mouth. When the taste hits his tongue, his face contorts. He even moans dreamily like you’re the most delicious dessert he’s experienced. The scene has your own brows furrowing, lips parting at just how hot and bothered he’s got you. 

Sensually, he trails the wet pads down, ghosting over a nipple, teasing you on their treacherous journey to your waiting core. He slides them in your wet cunt seamlessly, curling right into your g-spot. They move in a dip and wave that drives you wild, a wet suction noise sounding in the enclosed space. Turned on by your purrs and mewls, Jungkook subtly ruts against you, his plumping cock sliding between your cheeks.

“You’re already close, aren’t you?” He tuts patronizingly. “Gonna cum around my fingers, sweetheart?”

“No…”

“No?”

“Wanna cum with you…”

He stops, realizing what you’re alluding to, before pulling his fingers out and tapping your clit gently. “There’s another condom in my pocket. Can you hand it to me?”

“We don’t need it.”

“Yes, we do. Don’t be foolish.”

“... I’m on the pill,” you suggest hesitantly. Once again, you’re nothing but stupid and irresponsible when it comes to Jungkook. You just want to be with him, that’s all. 

“__,” he starts, voice shadowed with sternness, “give me the condom.”

Realizing he won’t budge, you do as he asks and fish it from his blazer, watching idly as he goes through all the steps—stroking himself to full mass, rolling on a barrier, and then positioning you between his spread legs as he guides you down onto his length with a hand on your hip. 

Cyclical. 

Like clockwork, your jaw drops, eyes screwing shut as you let him invade your space and infiltrate your mind. You don’t believe the two of you have ever tried this position before, but it feels so fucking good. His cock is so deep you can feel it in your fucking stomach. It’s obvious from his groaning and the aggressive spank he gives you that the unexplored angle is affecting him too. 

Outside, light rain begins chiming against the steel roof of his car as you take the first shallow rise of your hips. 

Scratch everything you’ve said about this not being a romance novel.

Distracted by the calming sound, you thoroughly miscalculate how much space you have in his sleek Mercedes Benz and bonk your head on the ceiling.

“Ow,” you wince with an embarrassed giggle.

Hissing at the impact, Jungkook clutches your head, massaging the area gently. “Are you okay?” His voice is muffled, and you can tell he’s trying his best not to laugh. 

“It’s not funny!” You shout playfully, slapping his knee. 

“No, it’s not. I’m sorry.” Chuckling, he moves your hair and places a gentle kiss between your shoulder blades. “You’re cute, that's all.”

Cute? You swoon. 

“Alright baby, keep going. Don’t stop,” Jungkook orders, the heel of his calloused palms pushing at your ass, encouraging you to bounce on his needy cock. A fucked-out sigh escapes him, head falling back for a split second before it jerks back up again, not wanting to miss the view of your perky cheeks rippling as they collide with his solid pelvis. “This position is so sexy.” Overwhelmed, he doesn’t know where to put his hands. He chokes you for a moment, plays with your tits, swats them, grabs your hips, and then finally settles on your clit, flicking it like a light switch.

“Jungkook!” You wail, knees knocking together as you brace yourself. Men you’ve dated in the past struggled to get you off. Sure, they made you feel good, but they couldn’t quite bring you to the edge. It only ever took Jungkook a matter of minutes to have you whimpering and shaking, begging for release. “I can’t take so much! I can’t!”

Ignoring your pleas, Jungkook pilots your right arm around his shoulder, sending you flush against his frame once more. Dipping his head, he sucks the closest nipple into his mouth. Caught off guard, you’re so overstimulated that your hips come to a grinding halt.

“Move,” he commands with his lips sealed around your piercing, sending dizzying vibrations to your sensitive bud. 

“I can’t,” you whimper, back arching off his chest as you try to calm all five tingling senses. 

“Yes, you can.” 

“No…”

Jeon Jungkook was never one to take no for an answer. 

Scooting further down the seat, his large hands clasp behind your knees. He lifts your legs until the heels of your white sneakers are on either side of the driver’s headrest. In this new position, he’s able to pound up into you freely, relentlessly beating into clenching walls. Hitting every single delicious spot inside of you. “Jungkook, please!”

“Please, what?” Honestly, you have no clue what you’re begging for. All you know is that his mushroom tip rigorously stimulating your g-spot is going to have you gushing at any moment. His guttural, sensual groaning does nothing to slow your approaching orgasm. “You want more?” 

As if you weren’t already gasping for air, Jungkook raises your legs to your head, knees locked onto his inner elbows. His fingers intertwine behind your neck, thumbs pressing into the base of your throat as he folds you in half. 

A full fucking nelson. 

“Watch me fuck it.” With a stern grip, he forces your gaze to his thick shaft, sliding in and out of your sopping cunt. Your vision is watery, but you can clearly see just how turned on you are, creamy juices coating his entire shaft. “Open it, baby. Watch what I do to you.” 

Reaching both hands under your thighs, you spread your lips, getting a better look at him completely destroying you.

“Isn’t it so pretty?” Jungkook grunts, speech slurred as his arousal lulls him into a delirious, catatonic state. “Tell me what you see, baby.”

“So pretty, Kook.” You’re simply playing into his dirty talk, but the sight of your bodies connecting, becoming one, is profoundly gorgeous. “So wet…”

“Yeah? Who’s pussy is this?”

“Yours.”

That sends him into a frenzy, thrusts becoming so punctuated and violent that his cock accidentally slips out. 

“Put it back in, put it back in!” You chant, frantically shoving his length into you. The yelp you chortle out is accompanied by the sound of your hand smacking against the foggy car window as your climax engulfs you. “I love it!”

“I love yo-”

He quickly cuts himself off, but everything stops when the sentence fragment hits the air. 

Is your brain playing sick, twisted jokes on you… or was he really just about to say he loved you?

Before you can even process what’s happening, your biological responses take over, sending through the most earth-shattering, world-bending, mind-boggling orgasm you’ve ever had. Everything goes blank. Your eyes cloud with splotches and stars. Your ears ring with static and white noise, blurring the sound of Jungkook cumming underneath you, and the pouring rain outside, splashing against concrete. 

This time, he doesn’t pull out, just works through both of your orgasms with gentle ruts and vulnerable whimpers.

After you’ve both calmed down and your heaves have diminished to a slow, even pattern, he pulls out, crumpling the used condom into a loose napkin he found in the center console. Still on his lap and in his arms, you watch intently as Jungkook leans his head back, eyes closing as he inhales deeply. To you, he looks almost… peaceful. 

The moon trickles in through the thin streams on the window, reflecting on his face like stained glass—something that was once so clear and pure now jaded with somber shades of blue. Sad, but still beautiful, you think. 

Delicately, you trace a finger over the black ink decorating his skin. You sit silently for a while, basking in the comfortable aura, simply enjoying one another’s company, before you finally speak.

“Why this?” You peep, pointing to the dainty letters at the base of his neck.

“It’s my daughter’s name.” He counters playfully, the faintest hint of a smile on his pierced lips.

“Well, duh, I know that,” you roll your eyes with a giggle, “but why here?”

“Yul is like air to me.” 

Humming in contemplation, you continue your journey over the endless swirls and loops. During sex, the first three buttons of his shirt popped open, exposing the pale canvas of his chest. You feel a thick, dark cloud loom over you when you reach a certain tattoo, the one that’s plagued your mind ever since you first saw it. 

Another name is engraved right above his heart in the same delicate font as Yul’s:

Seol. 

“Yul, please. Enough.” If Jungkook had a dollar for every time he's said that in the last twenty-two minutes, he’d be nearly as rich as his boss, sitting directly in front of him on a very important Zoom call. “Daddy is working.”

Jumping at the sudden inflection of his voice, the little girl on his lap pulls her tiny hand away. For the most part, Yul was well-behaved. However, working from home proved to be an obstacle that he and his clingy toddler have yet to overcome. 

She’s interrupted his meeting three times already. First, cutting off his proposal with the Baby Shark theme song, blaring from her Pinkfong tablet that he’d forgotten to mute. Second, peeking above his desk with her space buns and doe eyes to show his colleagues the latest addition to her squishmallow collection. The last straw was when she squeezed his nose. 

With watery eyes and warbled lips, Yul blinks at Jungkook, heartbroken and confused as to why he didn’t make that funny noise she loves so much. Quickly, her gaze averts to her chunky legs, swinging aimlessly as she attempts to hold back the tears.

“Excuse me for a moment,” Jungkook sighs, tacking on an apology before turning his screen off. “Bunny,” he lifts her chin with his index finger, another palm flat on her protruding tummy, “please, don’t cry. You’re not in trouble. Daddy just-”

The ring of a doorbell interrupts him.

“__?” Jungkook questions, baby at his hip as he stands in the doorway before you. “What are you doing here?”

You gulp. You weren’t expecting to see him.

Usually, you spoke to Seulgi. You’ve only ever seen Jungkook in passing, sparing quick greetings before he’s out the door. It worked in your favor, really, because for whatever reason, you felt extremely awkward around him.

Almost like that gross nervousness you get when you’re around someone you find so incredibly attractive it makes you uncomfortable…

Maybe it’s because he’s covered in tattoos and piercings. Maybe it’s because he’s a dad. Your group of fellow horny twenty-something-year-old friends have told you mythical stories and fantasies about older men. Freshly turned thirty-year-old men. Men like Jungkook. Dilfs. Something about that potent dad nut… Like, you know it works. 

It’s inappropriate; you know it is. You’ve always tried your best to ignore the feral thoughts.

Today seems to be putting your mental strength to the test because Jungkook is dressed in baggy gray sweats, long dark hair slicked back into a ponytail. A few loose strands dangle devilishly in front of his eyes, taunting you.

“I-It’s 10… I’m supposed to be babysitting.”

“I’m working from home today. My wife didn’t tell you?”

With wide eyes and hot cheeks, you shake your head. “I’m sorry for bothering you,” you stutter, stepping back and preparing to make a mad dash to your hand-me-down Honda Civic. “I’ll just… be on my way then.” 

“Actually.” An icy grip on your wrist stops you. “I could use some help. This one-” he nods his head towards Yul, stuck to him like velcro, “-is being a bit needy today.” 

One look at her turns your flustered gape into a smile. The past month with her has been more difficult than you’d imagined. Yul was incredibly sweet and intuitive, but unbearably shy. Building a relationship with the girl was challenging, but you were determined to overcome it. “No way,” you frown animatedly, tickling her leg with the tip of your finger, “Yul would never.”

A giggle or two had been the goal. Instead, she buries her face into her father’s shoulder.

“Don’t take it personally,” Jungkook orders, noticing the defeated slump in your shoulders. “She’s always like this with new people.”

Seulgi had warned you that Yul would take a while to come around. Hopefully, it’ll happen organically. But for now, a little gift or two wouldn’t hurt your efforts, you supposed last night while running errands. Reaching into your purse, you pull out a bottle of non-toxic, baby-friendly nail polish. “Yul, look what I have!”

“Wow,” Jungkook plays along, gently nudging her head out of his neck. “Bunny, look!”

He calls her Bunny? 

You’re in for it now. 

Plump fingers wrap around the plastic, taking it out of your own with an awe-stricken stare. She holds it up right in front of Jungkook’s nose. “Pink.”

“Mhm, that’s right,” he confirms, pecking her temple. “Now, Daddy has to get back to work. Can you stay with __ for a bit?”

She looks at him, then at you, then at him again, then back at you, and finally, landing on the nail polish, giving her father a reluctant nod. You knew it would come in handy. Despite her agreeance, Yul still stretches the neck of his shirt with her tiny fists as she’s transferred into your arms. 

Somehow, you managed to survive that painfully awkward encounter…

Only to be thrown into another one immediately after. 

See, you’ve always known Yul was a daddy’s girl. On good days, the toddler would grab you by the hand and guide you around the house, giving you a tour of everything that belonged to her father. His shoes at the door. His coat on the hook. Even taking you into the bathroom to show you his shampoo bottle. But that fact was never more apparent than now, as Yul stands in the middle of the living room on the verge of tears.

“Daddy?”

“He’s working, sweetheart. Remember?” You coo on your knees in front of her. You’re quick to redirect her. “I like your shoes.”

The sniffles stop as she glances down at her white sneakers. “Mine…” she takes a hesitant step back, mistaking your compliment as an attempt to swindle her out of them. 

“That’s right,” you laugh, “they’re so pretty, just like you.”

She blinks at you for a moment, and then begins stomping her little foot: heel first. When she’s finally able to kick off her left shoe, she bends all the way over, pressing her palms flat against the hardwood floor. It’s the most uncoordinated way you’ve ever seen anyone pick something up. 

Without warning, Yul throws the shoe across the room. Well, that had been her intention, you assume. She had cocked her arm back too far and released too early, making it land behind her. 

Oh no, she hates you. 

With an excited grunt and a bounce, Yul points to the sneaker—its clear sole sparkling pink and purple.

“Oh,” you sigh in relief. “They light up?” 

“Yesh.” Plopping right onto her butt, she takes the other one off, repeating the process. “Like this!” Her arms stretch out and she clenches her two little front teeth, executing the most stellar charade of a light you’ve ever seen. 

It’s a small breakthrough, but you’ll take it. 

Then you paint her nails, just like you said you would. She’s as patient as a toddler could be, but her tiny toe keeps curling under the tickle of the brush, making pink polish bleed outside of the lines. 

“My goodness,” you groan, admiring the messy, albeit adorable, result. “You’re so cute! Wait until your dad sees you.” 

Yul shrieks wildly, smacking both hands over her mouth as she hobbles to her feet. You watch with confused giggles as the milk-drunk baby stumbles down the corridor. You figure out where she's going too late. 

Yul stands on her tippy toes, jumping to click open the door to Jungkook’s office with a loud creak. 

“Yul!” You whisper-shout. “Don’t-”

“Daddy!” She calls, stepping a single foot into the room, showing off the fresh paint job. “So cute!” 

Literally, your only job today was to keep Yul preoccupied while Jungkook worked, and you failed. Your breath catches in your throat, awaiting his response. 

“So pretty,” he gasps, “now go play, baby. I’m almost done.” 

A relieved exhale flies past your lips. 

Something you’ve picked up on from years of babysitting is that little girls aren’t allowed to compliment themselves. They’re always told it’s rude or conceited. Jungkook does neither, and you find that so refreshing. 

“Close the door, please,” he orders before she runs away, “gently.” Yul does her very best to shut the door quietly and then sprints back to you. 

The next few hours go smoothly. You discovered that the green-hating toddler has an affinity for avocados after giving her a bite of your toast. “Mmm!” She had hummed, looking at you with wide eyes. With a full belly and squishmallow in hand, Yul went out like a light for her afternoon nap, giving you time to catch up on some reading. 

“How was she?” You didn’t even hear him come out of his office, so the deep voice makes you jump, eyes tracking the sound. He’s leaning against a kitchen counter, one tattooed hand stuffed in his pocket and the other wrapped around a water bottle. It’s a thick one too, and his fingers still touch. 

“Better,” you cough, “she’s sleeping now.”

He hums halfheartedly, dark irises boring into you as he takes a sip. Without Yul to soften the edges, Jungkook is… intimidating, to say the least. “What are you reading?”

“The Catcher in the Rye…” you peep, quickly closing it. “I know, it’s kinda lame.”

“No, not lame at all. Anyone who thinks that is lying to themselves… or is just being a contrarian.” He leans his elbows against the dark granite island, fingers crossing as he stares at you. You’re sitting idle across the room, but his presence looms over you. He has this way of making you feel like he’s in your head, listening to everything you’re thinking. 

You pray he’s not. If he is, you'll definitely be fired. 

“I can’t tell which one you are yet.”

You can’t tell if he’s joking or not, but the ‘yet’ makes you come clean, shifting in your spot on the leather couch. “... Both.”

“Right,” he smirks, tongue fiddling with his lip ring, almost like he’s taunting you. “That’s one of my favorite books, actually. I relate to it in many ways.”

Your fingers dance across the red cover, concealing hundreds of pages of isolation, emptiness, and the heavy dread of passing time. What an awful thing to relate to. Sometimes, when you get too engrossed in the text, glimmers of yourself bleed within the lines too. 

“You’re an English major, right?”

“Oh, um, I’m not in school at the moment… I just read for fun.”

“Well, you have an Associate’s degree.” Him knowing that information about you makes you think he asked the previous question with the intention of baiting you into this conversation. “Why not get your Bachelor’s?”

“I don’t know. It’s… complicated.” 

Why is he interrogating you? What does he want? For you to confess that the fear of becoming a full-fledged adult makes you not want to go back to college? 

“Life is complicated. You’d be ridiculous to not go back.” The audacity should make you mad, but he speaks with so much authority that you’re dumbfounded. His head tilts, eyes squinting as they shift to the ceiling, debating something. His tongue clicks when he finally makes his decision. “Follow me; I have something I want to show you.” 

With the curl of two thick fingers, Jungkook calls you to follow him down the hallway. You blink for a moment, gushing at the suggestive motion of his hand. Shaking your head at the evil, intrusive thought, you rise to your feet. 

Just like a child, you have to skip to catch up to his long strides. Your gaze trails along white walls; there are pictures of him and Yul, Yul and Seulgi, but not a single one of them all together. 

Now that you think about it, any affection you’ve ever seen in the household was reserved for Yul and Yul only. Seems like trouble in paradise…

You shouldn’t speculate.

The heavy wooden door creaks as Jungkook holds it open for you. You’re not sure what you expected his room to look like, but it certainly wasn’t this. The rest of the house is pretty modern, consisting of sleek blacks, whites, and woods. Countertops designed with icy swirled marble. Everything has this cold, impersonal vibe, but this room is the total opposite. The walls are baby blue, decorated top to bottom with dreamy clouds. You spot a chubby yellow star peeking out from underneath one of them, adorned with a hand-painted smiley face. On his nightstand, there’s a pastel purple foldable record player. Standing behind it is a single vinyl: Beautiful Boy by John Lennon. 

“Since you like to read,” Jungkook coughs, turning your attention to a sleek bookcase, stuffed to the brim with hundreds of titles you’ve never even heard of. “I figured you’d appreciate my collection.”

“Yeah, it’s…” The words trail off as you step forward. On a whim, your finger extends, tracing the delicate spine of a well-loved book. A low chuckle brings you back to reality; you peep, cheeks heating up in embarrassment as you yank your hand away. “It’s… really cool.”

“You can borrow something if you’d like. Does anything catch your eye?” Plopping down onto the computer chair, Jungkook rummages through his desk drawer and pulls out a tiny black case. You didn’t even know he wore glasses, and when he nudges them comfily onto the bridge of his nose, you nearly melt. As if he could get any more attractive.

“N-No,” you stutter as he wheels closer. Even though you’re towering over him, you still feel so small in his presence. You pray to God he can’t sense how incredibly nervous he makes you. “Not really.” 

“You wear your heart on your sleeve, you know,” he hums, low and sly. “Do I make you nervous?”

“No!” You peep in shock. Is the man a fucking mindreader? 

“Right.” Jungkook peers over the rim of his lenses, dark eyes glimmering in the whimsical glow of the room. “So __, what do you want to be?”

“A teacher,” you say, playing with your fingers.

“My wife wanted to be a teacher, too.” He shoots you the softest, gentlest smile. “She ended up doing business instead.” 

“Why?” You ask, gnawing on your bottom lip. You don’t mean to pry, but this is the first time you’ve ever actually talked to him in a meaningful way. Something about him intrigues you, like a puzzle you’re determined to find all the pieces to. 

“Ah, well,” he sighs, inked fingers scratching at the back of his neck. “We figured it’d be best for our family if we both pursued more lucrative career paths. I switched my major from English to finance.” You light up at the confession, the similarity putting you at ease. “I’m sorry if I was abrasive earlier,” he frowns, “I settled down young and had to sacrifice a lot, so I encourage you to go for something that fulfills you.” With his elbows on his knees, he leans closer to you. “I think you’d be a fantastic teacher. You take care of my daughter well.”

“Thank you,” you peep, cheeks heating up at the compliment. “I mean… you didn’t have Yul that young.” He tried to comfort you, so it’s only fair you do the same, right? “I think your late twenties are a great time to have children.”

Almost immediately, his face drops, eyes glazing over with something so raw. So… longing. You’ve never seen anything like it before. The corners of his nose twitch before he composes himself. “Yeah, I suppose they are.” His pink tongue toys with his lip ring, swiftly changing the subject. “You seem surprised.” 

“I guess I just wasn’t expecting all this.” 

“Expecting what?” 

“I don’t know,” you laugh clumsily, “books.” You mentally curse yourself as soon as the answer comes out. Really, __? Books? 

“What?” He starts, raising a brow at you. “You thought I couldn’t read?”

Thankfully, Jungkook takes your comment playfully. 

“Maybe,” you respond in the same lighthearted manner, feeling a bit more comfortable in his presence, “I also didn’t expect your room to look like a little boy’s room.”

All of the cheerfulness in the air evaporates as Jungkook glares at you with a clenched jaw and flared nostrils. Cleary irate. You’ve triggered a landmine.

“Jungkook, I’m-”

“Stop talking.” He raises a hand, cutting you off before you finish the sentence. Turning his back to you, he wheels over to his desk. “You can leave. You’re done for the day.” 

Looking back, you know why he was so upset that day. You had put the puzzle pieces together a while ago. You’re unsure of the details, and asking for them feels wrong. Silence feels wrong, too, though. Until now, you’ve never dared to speak up. 

You have no idea how to navigate something of this magnitude, but you just want him to know that you’re here. That you’re trying.

Cautiously, with your hand still on the tattoo, you whisper: “He must’ve been so beautiful, Jungkook…”

The thumb that had been drawing soft shapes into your side comes to an eerie pause as he freezes under you. When you look at him, your heart shatters. His chin is caved in with little dents, eyes glazed over with so much emotion. You’ve never seen a human being look so broken.

“Get off me.”

You frown at the shift in his demeanor. “Why?”

Remaining tight-lipped, Jungkook physically removes you from his lap, dumping you onto the seat next to him.

“Why can’t we ever talk about anything serious?”

He remains quiet as he slides his underwear up, not sparing you a single glance. When he speaks, his tone is painfully detached. “Like what?”

“Like what you said,” you answer curtly. 

“I didn’t say anything.”

“You were about to.”

Shaking his head with a cynical chuckle, he begins buttoning his pants, pretending you don’t exist. Like you’re not right beside him, falling to pieces. 

Your eyes dart to the ceiling, lashes fluttering rapidly as you mull over what to say next. You guess now would be an appropriate time to ask him what you’ve wanted for weeks. Blinking does nothing to combat your unshed tears when you realize that his answer has the potential to destroy everything you’ve been dreaming about. Everything you’ve hoped for. “When are you going to leave her?”

“Don’t be ridiculous.”

“I’m not being ridiculous, Jungkook!” Shaking your head furiously, you feel the first hints of anger in your chest, tears threatening to spill at any moment. “I’m not! I see the way you look at me!”

“What the fuck did you think was going to happen? Huh?” Finally, he’s paying attention to you, just not in the way you hoped. His face is beet red as he leans closer. “Don’t tell me you actually thought we were going to end up together, __. Seriously? You’re my babysitter! You’re seven years younger than me! This isn’t some fucking fairytale; it’s life! There’s no such thing as happily-ever-afters—grow up and stop acting like a damn child!”

“No, Jungkook,” you croak, fully sobbing as you push an angry finger into his chest. “You’re the one who’s acting childish! I may not be the most mature person, but at least I know how to accept love!”

“So let’s say I divorce my wife, then what? Huh?” He seethes. “I get partial custody? I only see Yul on weekends? Every other week? She grows up in a broken home? I refuse to ruin my daughter’s life like that.”

You take a shaky breath, eyes shifting to the car floor, the air fresher on his mirror, the window. Anywhere but him. The way Jungkook explains your make-believe future together is nothing how you envisioned it. Maybe he’s right. Maybe he’s just a fucking asshole. Neither thought process eases the pain.

“But you’re okay with ruining mine?”

For a moment, his features soften, and you see a glimmer of guilt wash over him. It fizzles out just as fast as it came. “You’re being dramatic.” Jungkook steps outside, tucking his shirt into his pants. “Get dressed.” 

With jittery hands and blurry eyes, you grab your discarded lace bra, the one you had bought just for tonight, and slide it on your shoulders. When you pick your shirt up, you see that it’s ripped and tattered. Completely destroyed. 

“Here,” Jungkook mumbles, tossing you his blazer as he watches you in the rearview. 

Once you’re dressed, you awkwardly slide into the passenger seat. The scent of his cologne makes your head pound and your stomach flip. 

“I want to go home.”

His lips part, preparing to persuade you otherwise. The hotel room he booked is ready and waiting, just as it is every Friday. He decides against it, simply murmuring an ‘okay’ before putting the keys in the ignition and starting the engine. 

“Do you want to get something to eat before I drop you off?” 

You just want your dad. 

“I just want to go home.”

Other than the whoosh of splashing puddles and your soft sniffles, the ride to your house is painfully silent. Leaning your head against the window, you watch the moon. For miles and miles, it never changes. It’s stagnant, frozen in time, surrounded by nothing but endless blackness. 

“Stop crying! I can’t stand it anymore!” Jungkook shouts, hitting the steering wheel with his open palm, finally growing uncomfortable from your non-stop tears. The sudden outburst makes you flinch. Sighing heavily, he pinches the bridge of his nose. “I’m sorry for yelling at you. Just… stop crying, please.”

You sink further into your seat, curling your lips into your mouth to suppress a sob.

“I’m not worth your tears, __.”

You feel nothing but relief when he finally turns onto your street, stopping all the way at the end, concealed by the night and the shadows of overhanging trees. 

“Am I picking you up next Friday?” He asks just before you leave. 

With raw cheeks and a scowl, you slam the door in his face. 

Your feet are so heavy that the sidewalk sinks under you like quicksand. No matter how many steps you take, the comfort of your house seems out of reach. Too far gone. Confusion weighs on your shoulders. You should feel proud, empowered even, but that voice in the back of your mind smothers any sense of relief. 

Deep down, you know this isn’t going to be the last weekend you spend with Jungkook. 

© chryblossomjjk 2022 [do not copy, translate or repost]

[madame-fear]

idk if you’ve done this already but fluff alphabet for DK! Jonathan pls🥺🥺

a/n : i haven't done a fluff alphabet for Nolanverse Jon before! so here it is 🥰 (i will be doing one for Gotham! Jon as well❤)

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A : Affection (how affectionate are they? how do they show affection?)

Jonathan's way of showing affection for you is by doing small actions he knows you're going to like, gifting you things, and words of affirmation.

For example, takes you out for a date, gifts you jewellery/crow pins, telling you how much he adores you, having a cuddling session, sitting you on his lap while he's working, etc.

B : Body (what is their favorite part of your body?)

Your hands. Jonathan loves how small and delicate they are compared to his hands when he compares them.

C : Cuddling (how do they like to cuddle?)

While cuddling, Jonathan is the big spoon. He loves pressing you tightly against his chest, and wrapping his arms around your body, with his head placed on your shoulder.

D : Dates (what does their ideal date with you look like?)

An ideal date for him is: coming back home from work to you, cook your favourite food, and have a movie night with you on the couch as you cuddle and are wrapped around blankets. That never fails to take all the stress out of him.

E : Emotions (how do they express emotion around you?)

Well... Jonathan is a bit of an introvert, so I doubt he'd show any emotion around you mainly because he doesn't like it. But if he had to, it would be by simply placing his head on your lap, and would tell you all about how he feels while you play with his hair.

F : Family (do they want one? If they do, when?)

When it comes to the idea of having a family with you, he'd be over the clouds at the simple thought of it. The problem is, he has a bit of serious issues with his parenting skills, and his double identity as Scarecrow – he gets worried that might affect/put to danger you and your child.

Other than that, he'd absolutely love to form a beautiful family with you.

G : Gifts (how do they feel about gift giving? What are their habits when it comes to this?)

Jonathan loves gifting you things, and unadmittedly, he'll enjoy receiving gifts from you as well. Gifting is one of his way of expressing love, and whatever you want, he'll get it immediatly and gift it for you.

H : Holding Hands (when/how do they like to hold hands?)

He always loves holding your hands since it's his favourite part of your body. When going out for a walk together, when cuddling, and when reading together

I : Injury (how would they act if you got hurt?)

My man becomes a walking havoc. Literally tracks down whoever hurt you, and will put their shit together by fear gassing the hell out of them.

If you, on the other hand, got hurt because let's say you accidentally cut yourself, he'll immediatly rush to your aid and will ask you if it hurts, and if you're ok.

J : Jokes (do they like to joke around with or prank you? how?)

His ass is a little sarcastic bitch. So his way of joking around with you is by making sarcastic remarks about people surrounding you, or certain situations.

K : Kisses (how do they like to kiss you?)

His kisses are passionate and slow. He loves placing a hand either on your cheek, or behind your neck and the other one on the lower part of your back while he kisses your lips. Jonathan also loves kissing your cheeks, and forehead.

L : Love (how do they show you they love you?)

By words of affirmation (telling you how much he adores you), physical contact (kissing, hugging, cuddling), and through gifts.

M : Memory (favorite memory together?)

When the two of you first met.

You met because you accompanied a close friends of yours to see a relative who was an Arkham patient; and the first moment he laid eyes on and talked with you, he absolutely fell hard for you.

N : Nightmare (what is their worst fear?)

His worst fears are: losing you, and finding out you gor hurt by some Gothamite scum.

O : Oddity (what is one quirk they have?)

He can remember every single fun fact & detail about you. Ask him, and he'll remember the exact date and hour of whatever thing you told him you liked or disliked.

P : Pet Names (what do they like to call you?)

“dear/darling”, “beloved”, “princess”, “love”, “beautiful”.

Q : Quality Time (how do they like to spend time with you?)

By simply cuddling with you before, or after work. Having a binge night as well, and maybe, by simply reading in silence.

R : Rhythm (what song reminds you of them?)

church - chase atlantic

S : Secrets (how open are they with you?)

He's very open with you: always sharing his plans regarding the fear toxin, telling you how his day went, what he thinks, what he likes and dislikes, etc. You're his beloved soulmate, and wants you to know he trusts you enough to share everything with you.

T : Time (how long did it take you to get together?)

A month and a half.

Jonathan was a bit shy with you, but quickly got used to your presence and, knowing you were showing some interest in him, he quickly invited you out for a date. After that, things escalated to the point where you began dating.

U : Upset (how do they act when you’re upset?)

As tempted as he may be to annoy you with questions about why are you upset and who made you feel this way, he'll give you time and space if you ask him for it. He'll wait until you're more calm, and when you approach him, he'll prepare a cup of hot chocolate so you can rant about whatever you wish.

V : Vaunt (what are they proud of? Do they like to show you off?)

Oh man, he is absolutely PROUD of how incredibly sweet and intelligent you are. He will proudly show you off to everyone he knows as his soulmate, he'll talk to everyone about your accomplishments, and how loving & patient you are.

W : Warrior (how do they feel about you fighting? Would they fight for you, beside you, etc?)

At first, the thought of you fighting by his side as Scarecrow ironically frightened him; he didn't want you to have anything to do with his dirty business regarding the fear toxin, and taking over Gotham.

But after a while, once he saw you kick someone's ass that was disrespecting you, he quite began fancying the idea of you being his sidekick.

X : X-Ray (how well are they able to read you?)

Jonathan is a psychiatrist! He is able to perfectly read every single nuance of your facial expressions. In fact, he knows you better than you know yourself. He'll catch right away when something's wrong with you.

Y : Yes (how would they propose to you?)

By taking you on a date and being outside all day long, and when you come back home, he'll prepare your favourite food for you. After dinner, he'll propose to you with a black & gold ring box, and will proudly show you a little crow ring he bought for your engagement.

Z : Zen (what makes them feel calm?)

After coming home from doing his villain duties as Scarecrow, he'll love to place his head on your chest and listen to your calm heartbeat while he falls asleep. He loves it when you prepare hot chocolate for the two of you after working with the fear toxin & being Scarecrow.

──────────────────────

♡ taglist : ♡

@wittywitchness @anemicroyalties @imagine--if

[halsteadlover]

Daddy's Little Girl

*Gif not mine credits to the owner*

• Pairing: Jay Halstead x Reader.

• Requested by @tinfoilhat2719: Hey! I wanted to make a request, if that’s okay :). Jay as a girl dad. Like I feel like if him and readers first child is a girl he would just have such a special bond with her and ur would be so cute 🥺 and my bestie @hereforhalstead: So i'm gonna need you to write something inspired by that insta you just sent me with Jay and the child because IT KILLED ME AND I NEED TO SEE YOU WRITE IT BECAUSE LQAMDNFGHBHEDNJ

• Warnings: none, just ugly ass writing.

• Word count: 4682.

• A/N: so since I had these two requests pretty much similar I decided to write a piece for both of them 😂 needless to say this is ugly as fuck and I can't believe I'm even posting this, but @resanoona literally thereated to kick my ass if I didn't post so here it is, pls don't come at me. Like imagine not posting for so long and then coming back with this shit. Deleting myself bye ✋🏻

The day your daughter was born was the most beautiful ever of your life, nothing had prepared you for the overwhelming emotion and feeling that holding her in your arms caused you. Finally seeing her after nine interminable months was almost a dream, a dream from which you never wanted to wake up again. All the excruciating pain, the labor, the sleepless nights, all faded into the background when you heard her cry as soon as she was born. It was all worth it.

Being able to finally see her little face, kissing her cheeks was so emotional that you cried all the tears in your body. Jay did nothing but tease you and take pictures of you hugging and holding your daughter but he hadn't considered that he was even in almost worse condition than yours. You wasted no time reminding him of the way he nearly passed out when the baby was born to which he simply replied by blaming the heat.

It was the middle of winter.

If holding your daughter in your arms was an overwhelming feeling and the happiest moment of your life, seeing the love of your life become a father made you touch the sky with your finger. Seeing his eyes shine so bright they could illuminate the darkest of nights alone made your heart warm with joy and God, few times in your life have you ever felt that way.

“Okay Y/N, just a few moments away. Just a couple of thrusts and the baby will join us. We see her little head. C'mon! You can do it!” the doctor exclaimed between your legs. The pain was excruciating, your chest rising and falling quickly as if you were running a marathon, your forehead wet with sweat. You thought you couldn't make it, that you were going to die at any moment. That was definitely one of the things, if not the hardest thing you've ever faced in your entire life. Jay meanwhile was next to you as he continued to caress your face and push the locks of your hair away from your face.

“I can't... I can't do this...” you cried, exhausted and without strength.

“Yes you can baby, you can do it,” Jay said, pressing his lips on your forehead “Just few moments and we can hold our daughter, you're so strong love, I don't know anyone else who would be able to face what you're facing...”

“It hurts!” you exclaimed, looking at him but with your eyes clouded by tears. You were in so much pain at the time you didn't notice that Jay's green eyes were also full of tears.

“I know baby, I know. If I could I’d take all the pain away...” he kissed you again, stroking your hair, feeling his heart breaking in million of pieces “Here, take my hand, don't worry about holding her tight.”

And fuck if you squeezed his hand tightly.

Jay didn't even believe it was humanly possible you could have all that force until he feared you could break his fingers. He didn't complain about the pain, he knew it wasn't in the least comparable to what you were feeling in those moments, he didn't blink when you showered him with insults, swearing he would never touch you again.

He actually even found it funny but he didn't dare laugh, he knew you were going to kill him.

Your screams echoed through that hospital room, and as the doctor continued to encourage you to push, Jay felt the chasm inside him open up more and more. He hated seeing you like that, seeing you in so much pain and not being able to do anything to stop it. It was a mixture of emotions he had never felt before - perhaps it was close to what he had felt since he had known you - fear, joy, anxiety, worry, happiness.

He was about to become a father.

It was really happening.

“Here I see the head honey, another push and the baby’s out” the doctor announced with joy and Jay made the mistake of glancing between your legs. He had seen hundreds dead people’s bodies, badly injured over the course of his policing career, but seeing the little girl's head come out of you almost made him collapse.

“Sir are you okay?” a nurse asked noticing how Jay's complexion had become the same as a ghost. He nodded, not being able to answer and immediately looked away and then back to you. You giggled in tears. “Jay go sit down I don't want you to pass out.”

“No way baby I'm fine, I'm not leaving you.”

With one last push the doctor gave birth to the baby and you didn't notice how much you had held your breath until you heard her cry and at that point you let out a sigh of relief.

You wished you could have filmed on your cell phone the moment Jay cut the umbilical cord, the way he kept asking every second if he was doing right and didn't want to risk hurting the baby, the way his hand was shaking despite the heartening words of the doctor and the nurses.

Your heart exploded with joy when you finally held your baby and even more when he picked her up.

Isabel Kay Halstead.

Jay still couldn't believe it.

He was really holding his daughter.

Sure, nine months had passed, but it was only then he really realized it, when he realized for a fact his world had just turned upside down.

He was so happy, so fucking happy.

The baby was asleep and he was sitting in a chair next to your bed as he stroked your hair, looking at you with all the love he had.

“Try to get some sleep baby, you did such a great job today you deserve it” he whispered, a little smile on his lips. You giggled as you started to feel heavy eyelids, god you were so tired.

“But what if Isabel wakes up...”

“I'm here if she wakes up, you deserve to rest my love. Don’t think about doing anything else for the next few months. You carried her for 9 months and you've just given birth, the least I can do is let you sleep. She's safe baby.”

You smiled, nodding slightly. You knew he meant to keep his word, you knew he would sacrifice everything to rest you and take care of your daughter.

“I'm so proud of you baby” he whispered after leaving a kiss on your forehead but you didn’t hear those words, having fallen asleep before he could even finish the sentence.

Jay stood up and tucked the covers over your shoulders as he watched you sleep for a moment. He smiled, unable to believe how lucky he felt to have chosen you as his life partner and mother of his daughter.

Taking care not to make any noise, he walked over his baby's crib, delighting to watch her as she slept. With his forefinger he lightly stroked her little plump, rosy cheeks.

He really just couldn't wrap his mind about the fact she was finally there, that he could finally look at his daughter, hold her. She was so small, so tiny and he couldn't believe how such a small being could have messed up his world so much.

Jay hadn't realized you’d woken up shortly after, not being able to continue sleeping.

Isabel slept in his arms while he continued to gently rock her, sitting on a small armchair. He didn't take his eyes off her even for a second and you couldn't help but think how lucky you felt watching Jay with the baby, how you could never wish for a better father for your daughter.

“God I already love you so much” he whispered to his newborn, observing her as if she was the most beautiful of wonders. She moved slightly but despite this she didn’t wake up, continuing to sleep.

“I still can't believe you're here, your mom and I are so happy. I'm not gonna lie baby, when mom told me she was pregnant I panicked, not because I didn't want you, indeed you are the best gift I have ever received, but because I was so scared. I'm still so afraid. I'm afraid of not being good enough for you, of not being the father you deserve to have. I am not perfect baby, I cannot promise I won’t make you angry, that I will never be wrong but I promise I will try not to, I promise I will always be there for you, at any time. I'll be there when you’ll take your first steps, when you’ll say your first word, when I’ll have to punch someone for hurting you. No one will hurt my little girl I swear on my life...” he chuckled, suddenly feeling a pit in his stomach open at the thought that his little girl would grow up “God baby I'm not ready for you to grow up, can you stay like this forever? I'm not ready to share you with the world, just the thought makes me panic. Is it normal? I don't think so but we'll pretend it is,” he continued, stroking Isabel's cheek as he continued to look at her “You're truly the best thing that has ever happened to me, or rather, you and mom are the best things that have ever happened to me. I can't even expressing what I feel inside, I'm so fucking happy...” he chuckled again, feeling his eyes watery “Don't let mom know I said this word or she'll kill me.”

Jay was silent for a moment, his eyes still on his little girl. He didn't even realize he had started crying until a tear ran down his cheek and fell on Isabel's. He wiped it off quickly, unable to keep his emotions.

“I love you so, so damn much...”

-

Three years passed from that day on and Isabel had certainly become daddy's little girl. The way she had him wrapped around her finger was something never ceased to surprise you. The way those two loved each other made your heart burst with joy, in a way you never thought possible.

“Mommy, when is dada coming home?” your little girl asked, approaching you with her favorite puppet in her hand, of course a gift from Jay.

“You know Isabel I'm starting to think you love dad more than mom,” you replied as you continued tidying up the living room, giggling. Isabel hugged your legs, being careful not to drop her puppet, looking at you with her big green eyes, capable of melting the coldest of hearts. They were really Jay's eyes, god, it was like see him in those two emerald pools.

“That's not true mommy!” she exclaimed in an even offended tone of voice, then waving her arms in the air as if she wanted to be taken in your arms. You pulled her up and she hugged you with her little arms, with all the strength she had in her body. “I love you too so much, not only dada. I love you both equally!” she said with her little voice and you filled her face with kissed, making her giggle.

“I know sweetie, I know. I love you so so much” you said, breathing deeply the scent of her hair. “Do you want to surprise dada?”

Isabel's eyes lit up instantly as soon as you mentioned her dad and she nodded quickly, not even knowing what the surprise was.

“What surprise?”

“It's lunchtime soon, would you like to cook something together and bring it to him at work? I'm sure he misses you a lot too and can't wait to see you.”

Isabel began to exult and clap her little hands so much that holding her was impossible, so you gently placed her on the ground and like a bolt she ran towards the kitchen, followed by you who couldn't stop smiling.

“Hurry up mommy! Let's cook!”

And you were right.

Jay missed both of you so damn much, he couldn't stop thinking about how much he wanted nothing more than to go home, be with you and Isabel and not think about anything else.

He giggled when he thought back to the moments when he made fun of Alvin and Antonio for wanting nothing more than to go home and be with their children, telling them to have more fun, but the truth was since Isabel was born he didn't want to do anything else. He wanted to do nothing but be with his daughter, with you, all the time.

In a moment of break at work, Jay took the opportunity to send you a message asking how both of you were doing in the morning and obviously some photos of Isabel. He wasn't surprised when you didn't answer him right away, he knew how much Isabel could keep you busy.

When you arrived at the district, you and Isabel greeted Trudy who had the usual pout on her face, which disappeared as soon as she saw Isabel jumping with a huge smile on her face.

“Look at you little Halstead! Aren’t you the prettiest little girl? You came here to see me right?” Trudy asked, stroking Isabel's head and hugging her, knowing full well this wasn’t true.

Isabel shook her head, awkwardly pulling a lock of hair out in front of her eyes, which made you smile. “No, we are here to see daddy, we cooked his lunch and brought it to him. Can I see him? Can I see him? Where's he?”

“Oh I’m offendend now,” Trudy pouted and Isabel gave her a peck on the cheek to cheer her up. “I'm gonna buzz you up, I'm happy too see you both and Halstead's gonna be happy too, he's been grumpy all day.”

“Thank you Trudy,” you thanked her and after giving her a hug, you gently grabbed Isabel’s hand and went upstairs.

“Look who's there!” Kim's voice caught Jay's attention and when he looked up and saw you and Isabel climbing the stairs his heart almost burst with joy. He jumped up from his desk, going straight to meet you two.

“Dada!” Isabel exclaimed with joy, letting go of your hand and running to meet her father, who immediately took her in his arms making her spin in the air.

“Oh my god what are you doing here? I'm so happy to see you!” he said as he hugged the baby. You couldn't stop smiling seeing them together, that scene was so tender everyone's hearts melted, even Voightìs.

“I missed you Dada, we brought you lunch! Mum and I cooked it, but I cooked more,” Isabel spoke as she looked at her father with loving eyes. Jay let out a sound of amazement before printing a kiss on the child's cheek. “No way! I'm sure it’s so good!”.

He looked over at you, with a smile that nearly made you pass out on the floor in front of everyone else.

“Hi baby” he whispered, approaching you and giving you a kiss on your lips “You look so good.”

You didn't have time to answer as Adam's voice preceded you. “You two are disgusting. How about running away from here little Halstead?” he asked, approaching the three of you but looking just at Isabel.

She shook her head, hugging Jay even more. “I want to stay with Dada.”

“Oh... Is that so? Then I guess I'll have to return that little toy I bought you...” Adam spoke and Isabel's eyes lit up, trying immediateky to go him. You laughed, rolling your eyes at how everyone on the team continually spoiled her.

-

One night Jay was taking a shower, you and Isabel were in bed playing together. The bathroom was attached to the bedroom so when you heard the shower head go off you knew Jay was done.

And Isabel understood it too.

In fact, she jumped on the bed suddenly, instantly giving up the toys she was playing with and headed for the dresser where Jay had his shirts.

“What are you doing darling?” you asked amusedly at the way her small hands tried to open the drawer, which was far more substantial than hers.

“Dada shirt!” she exclaimed, almost crying when she realized she couldn't open it on her own. You got up and went near her to be able to help her, and in no time at all she grabbed a shirt and ran out of the room, going to meet Jay who was just coming out of the bathroom.

He had a towel around his waist and another in his hands as he dried his hair with another one.

Damn I am so lucky.

“Dada! Dada! Your shirt!” A huge smile was painted on his face as she saw her daughter running towards her waving his shirt in her hands.“Oh baby thank you so much, come here. What I would do without you,” he said, reaching down to her height and picking her up before starting to fill her with kisses.

“Ew dada you're all wet!” Isabel exclaimed, a disgusted expression on her face as she struggled to free herself from Jay's grasp, giggling and squeaking at the same time. “Let me go!”

“Never!” he exclaimed continuing to kiss her as he walked to your bedroom. It was in vain for Isabel to ask for her help as Jay never let her go, instead he placed her on the bed and started tickling her. The room filled with the sound of Isabel's laughter and giggles as she continued to stir under Jay's grasp.

You couldn't stop looking at them and smiling, feeling your heart explode with joy and happiness. The way those two loved each other was a love you had never seen or felt, it was something you didn't even see in movies.

Isabel doted on her father and her father doted on her, they were like siamese twins, they just couldn't be without each other.

You and Isabel had an unbreakable bond, there was no question of that, but the feeling that bonded her to her father was visceral, something you admitted you would never have.

You would never change anything, you loved the way they loved each other and with each passing day this love grew more and more. You loved the way Isabel could always count on Jay, the way she took refuge in his arms when she was sad or when she cried, how she jumped and was excited when he came back home from work in the evening.

“Dada can I sleep with you and mama tonight?” she asked, looking at Jay like you weren't even there.

“Isabel I...” you intervened but obviously Jay hadn't even let you finish the sentence that he had already agreed.

“Of course you can baby,” he replied, hugging her and stroking her hair.

“You know Isabel, you are a big girl now and big girls sleep alone the night,” you said, knowing full well it was a losing battle.

“But I have nightmares mama, I want to be with you,” she replied, putting on the tenderest and cutest dog face she was capable of as she alternated her gaze between you and Jay.

“You can sleep with us as long as you want, no nightmare will bother my little baby,” Jay spoke up, hugging her again not before he kissed her forehead. Isabel started giggling as she snuggled Jay, a malevolent expression on her face as she looked at you.

I can't believe this.

Three years and she already knew how to leverage the feelings of her father, when you said she had it wrapped around her little finger you were not lying at all.

She was definitely Jay's daughter.

And that’s how they fell asleep together and hugged each other that night, her lying on Jay's chest as he had his arm around her little body in a protective manner.

“Come here baby,” he had said before falling asleep, spreading his other arm as if to invite you. You obviously didn't make him repeat it again and, as far as possible without waking Isabel up, you settled into his arm, your head resting in the hollow of his neck. “Hey give me a kiss.”

His tone even sounded offended when he noticed you were nestled on him, making you giggle as you lifted your head and stamped a thousand kisses on his lips.

“You know she has you wrapped around her finger right?” you teased him, leaning your head back as you stroked your daughter’s hair.

“Oh yeah I know but just look at her cute, how can you say no to that face? It's your fault anyways.”

“What? Why?”

He kissed you on the forehead before yawning. “Those puppy dog ​​eyes, she got them from you. You know damn well I can't resist them.”

The times you let Isabel sleep with you and Jay were not uncommon, but there was certainly no shortage of little squabbles trying to getting her to sleep alone. Jay was right, it was really hard to tell her no.

But unluckily, there were even the nights when she woke up crying because of some nightmare and those were the nights when you felt most guilty for leaving her alone. This happened in particular when it was raining and there was thunders. You heard her crying through the baby monitor one night but before you could even figure out what was going on, Jay had already jumped out of bed and ran into Isabel's room, followed right after by you.

His heart was beating madly, his paranoid mind already thinking of the worst possible and imaginable scenarios.

“Hi baby, it's okay I'm here. Dad's here, it's okay” he would say to her, immediately taking her in his arms and holding her tightly to his chest while he cradled her and stroked her hair.

Isabel cried, refusing her face in the hollow of her father's neck, her safe haven.

“It's okay baby, nothing's gonna happen to you, mama and dada are here” he kept whispering in her ear to calm her down.

“I hate... I hate thunders...” she sobbed, even struggling to speak from her tears, her little body shaking with sobs. You approached them and started stroking her hair.

“Look at me baby,” you said and at that point Isabel looked at you, her face red and streaked with her tears as Jay continued to cradle her in his arms.

“I know they're scary my baby. Like dad said we wouldn't let anything happen to you, you're safe. How about you come and sleep with us?” you asked her and at that point her crying subsided and her eyes began to shine. The way she stopped crying so suddenly almost made you laugh. Jay couldn't help himself and let out a chuckle after you two exchanging a look, kissing Isabel at the top of her head after.

“Really?”

“Of course baby, you can stay with us as long as you want,” you said, cupping her face and wiping her tears with your fingers. She smiled and stretched her arms out to you, a sign she wanted to be held by you.

“Let's go sleep honey,” you said, kissing her cheek.

“Dada can I sleep on you?” she asked, after the three of you had settled into the bed.

Jay chuckled, opening his arms widely. “Can I ever say no to this pretty face? Come here.”

She giggled and settled on Jay's chest. He hugged her, holding her tightly to him and placing kisses on her head, pampering her in an attempt to make her completely forget what had happened. She was so grown but she seemed so small in Jay's arms at the same time.

And like this she fell asleep, held in the arms of one of the people who loved her most in the world.

-

Going to work the next day was more tiring than usual and you couldn't wait to go home and see Jay and your little girl, be with them for a while and forget everything else.

As soon as you opened the door of the apartment you shared with Jay, your gaze immediately went to search for Isabel and Jay, who you knew was off work earlier that day. “I'm home!”

No reply.

After closing the door behind you and hanging your jacket on the hanger, you realized why no one had answered. In an instant the house was filled with giggles and screams and laughter and the sound alone caused a huge smile to form on your face, your heart full of joy. As a magic trick, instantly all the tiredness and frustration of the day seemed to have vanished.

Entering the living room you immediately saw Jay sitting on the sofa and Isabel sitting on his lap squirming as he tickled her. They were so much in their own little world they didn't even notice your presence, so you just leaned on the door jamb and looked at them with a stupid expression on your face.

He was the first to notice between the two. “Hey look who's back!” he exclaimed with a huge smile as soon as he saw you, pointing in your direction. Isabel followed the direction of his gaze and let out a small scream when she saw you, quickly getting off Jay's legs and running towards you.

“Mama!”

You reached down to her height and opened your arms, hugging her as she threw herself on you. “I missed you mommy.”

“Oh baby I missed you too baby, sooo much,” you replied, filling her face with kisses as she giggled.

“Just her?” Jay asked jokingly, standing up and coming towards you as you too stood up with Isabel in your arms.

“Do I know you sir? Why are you in my house?”

He laughed and kissed you on your lips, completed with an “Ew” exclaimed in full disgust from Isabel, causing you and Jay to burst into laughter. You both knew the real reason was her innate jealousy towards her father.

After having dinner, you were sitting on the sofa, playing with your daughter. “What is it?” you asked, noticing the way Jay was smiling. His gaze was directed at little Isabel who continued to play with her toys. Isabel's birth had really changed him, you had seen Jay happy but the way he did nothing but talk about the baby, to everyone with so much pride it almost made you cry, the way he wanted to do nothing but be with her, god, you've never seen someone have so much love for someone else.

“I just...” he sighed happily “I just love her so fucking much. Like I can't even explain it, I would burn the world to the ground if she asked me too.”

You chuckled and he put his arm around your shoulders, drawing you to him before hugging you.

“I want another 300 of her.”

“What?" you asked, looking at him as if a second head had just sprung up.

“I want more kids, lots of them, like I want a football team.”

“Sure easy for you to say, you’re not the one who’s gonna push them out of your vagina,” you joked, giving him a light nudge that made him laugh “Let's give Isabel just a brother or a sister for now, what do you think?”

“Really?” he asked looking at you for a moment with adoring eyes that shone like two stars. You nodded giggling like a schoolgirl as you noticed the little grin on his lips. He alternated his gaze between your eyes and your mouth, wetting his lips with his tongue.

Oh god.

For some absurd reason you knew exactly what was going through his head at that very moment and you couldn't deny that whatever it was you couldn't wait for it to happen.

“Can't wait to have another one, baby.”

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[bowieandqueen11]

Leon Kennedy Looking After A Sick Reader Headcanons

Request: Please can I rq Leon looking after a sick reader? (Re 2 Leon pls cause hes 🥺🥺🥺)

Honestly I feel that 100% RE2 Leon my beloved ;*)

Warning: mentions of alcoholism and violence/blood.

(I do not own Resident Evil or its characters, all rights go to creators. Gif credit goes to @yyh.)

☆.。.:*・°☆.。.:*・°

LOOK AT HIM!!! HE’S B A B Y 😭 😭 😭 HE’S THE ONE THAT NEEDS LOOKING AFTER

In all honesty, Leon Scott Kennedy can pretend to be all tough and rational and proficient when it comes to looking after the one thing in this world he truly, truly cares about, but we all know inside this boy is freaking the heck out. He loves you - quite literally worships the ground you walk on. Every smile, every word, every touch in his direction feels like sparks of life running through his veins, until his mind is clouded with nothing but joy and thoughts of you. So he’s terrified that he’ll mess up somehow until guilt and alcohol are his only companions.

So, sometimes you have to be the one to calm HIM down when he comes rushing into the bedroom with like ten different types of cough syrups and cans of soups from the local pharmacy with a panic stricken look on his adorable little face.

‘I- I was going to get this one, but look! This one is strawberry flavour! And then this one has eucalyptus extract!’ He’s shoving them in your face, trying his best to juggle all of them in his arms as you start laughing. Only then does he calm down, that little smirk beginning to line his face as you grab the first bottle you can get your hands on and tell him that one will be fine, thanks.

I fell like you being sick would also kind of trigger him in some way though? I mean, it’s only been a couple of months since you and Leon managed to be two of only few survivors during the outbreak in Raccoon City. Although the two of you have managed to start building a life together - fresh, anew, feeling loved and safe and finally okay, he still jumps and absentmindedly reaches for his pocket every time you cough or groan. In the back of his mind, he’s still that young rookie - stuck scared in that old police station, surrounded by zombies and grime and splatters of blood shredded against the walls, and so he’s still terrified that you’re about to turn and he’s going to finally lose the love of his life.

He kind of just always feels guilty, and somehow thinks that you getting sick was his fault. He can end up being a bit overbearing when he wants to spend all day every day just cuddled up by your side.

He just refuses to leave you until he sees you smile, even if you have to shove his fur leather jacket into his arms and try and shove him out the door yourself. The one thing he has to do before he finally gets on his motorbike, though, is to give you a massive, tender, face cupping kiss on the lips and final little brushing of his nose against your own.

He’s so cute though!!! If it’s the weekend when you’re ill, you’ll wake up with him snoring against your neck like a little teddy bear. His eyelashes are flush under your chin, arm wrapped tightly and securely around your chest as he lies half over your legs. His fingers are intertwined with your own, resting against your hip, and its almost impossible to wake him up so you can take your cough syrup without him whining.

He also knows that secretly, even though he doesn’t especially like it, that it at least makes you feel a little bit better if you get to play with his hair. So he just sucks it up, and kind of dips his head down onto your shoulder until the blonde strands are tickling your cheek to let you know that you can run your fingers through them.

I mean his job is quite important to, you know, world safety, and so he does eventually have to go to work, but during every break during his training your message machine will start blinking red with messages left by him. Just sweet little notes floating through the air about ‘how much he loves you’, and ‘I’ll pick you up some of your favourite chocolates from the store on the way home’ and ‘he’s rushing back as soon as possible.’

He’s not the BEST cook in the world, honestly just because I feel like his mom wasn’t home too often to be able to teach him. But he does his best not to let the can of soup he’s trying to heat on the stove explode into a hot shower of bubbles while he simultaneously runs you a hot. steamy bath.

Not going to lie, when he’s this young and inexperienced he’s the kind of guy to take your temperature and go wow??? 97??? You’re having 97 babies??? Lmao

Although he’s a big cuddly koala to go to sleep with, I feel like Leon’s apartment would be all neat, and organised, and full of straight corners and minimalistic furniture. He decides the best course of action to make you feel all snuggly and cosy is to ring up Claire and ask to borrow a few blankets that the two of you can cuddle up under on the couch. He spends the whole time with his hand resting on your thigh, stroking your skin as you stretch your tired legs over his lap.

Man has definitely bought matching pyjamas for the two of you during your time living together, so be ready for these silk bad boys to come out.

In summary - RE2 Leon is a huge cuddly beanstalk that becomes entangled to you until you don’t know where he ends and you begin. And that’s exactly what you want!! He’s so in love with you its actually ridiculous, which Hunnigan tells the two of you time and time again a few years later.

[stargirlfics]

hi honeybun 🥺 i’m starting to feel reallllllyyyyyy little tonight and i just wanted to ask if you would share you most favorite henry cavill looks? 🥺🥺 i’m quite fond of how he looks in that video of him building the pc (he just looks so big!) buuutttt i wanna know what you think

Hi angel!!! I totally feel you on that one! There’s something about watching him concentrate on building something that just 🥺👉🏾👈🏾 he really does look beefy in that video

I want him to pick me up like that tbh firm but real gentle you know

Some of my other favorite looks are these:

He just looks like definition of stern daddy™️ in these and it makes me feraL! Not to be that person but literally imagine being in littlespace and you’re at his feet in that second pic coloring or something and he leans down to kiss you 🥺 thanks I want it!

And finally, when his curls are showing!!!

It gives him such a soft, teddy bear kind of vibe and I just wanna play with it 🥺 I bet his hair is so soft and can you imagine waking up and giggling at him and he’s like what? and you’re like daddy your hair is all crazy!...no it’s ok I’m fine sir!

His Walter look is also one of my faves cause it takes that teddy bear look to like a grizzly bear type of look and I’m really all about it! 🥰🥰🥰

And lastly as just one of my favorite pictures of him:

It’s giving me real, picnic with him and Kal and your favorites stuffies and he lets you lay on him and you watch the clouds go by together and he asks you what shapes they make! 🥺

Thank you for coming to my TED Talk lmfao but yeah these are some of my favoriteeeees although I’m sure he could sport any look and I’d be like that’s a meal! I’m so glad you asked!

[thedaddie]

@flwrstrawberry

hi! i saw your haikyuu matchups post and thought it would be fun to try out lol. i’ve never really done anything like this before so sorry if it’s kinda wrong haha

i am female and go by she/her pronouns.

i’m 5’1 and have a slim/athletic body type. i have black hair that’s super messy (it literally looks like a rats nest lol) that sits just above my shoulders and my eyes are light brown.

i am an ambivert to the core though i prefer to be introverted. i’m still pretty obnoxious and can be quite loud, though, often to mess with my friends. i love reading classical literature, painting/digital art, and creative writing! i am relatively quiet and reserved but super chaotic when i get close with people.

also my zodiac is taurus and my mbti personality is isfp!

thank you so much :D

hi hi! thank you for requesting!! i match you with…

ATSUMU MIYA

CHILDHOOD FRIENDS TO LOVERS SUPREMACYYYYY

you and the miya twins have been BESTIES since practically birth

you guys went everywhere together, had weekly sleepovers, etc

then as you guys got older you realized that atsumu, despite being loud and dramatic, was actually pretty cute

and on the other side of things, atsumu was getting over his “girls have cooties” phase (because he totally believed in that cmon) and thinking the same about you

but i know FOR A FACT it wasn’t a one and done confession

this shit went on for YEARSSSSS

osamu was sitting there hearing both of you talk about each other from mf middle school to high school

then finally one day he left y’all alone in a room together because he was DONE (his last straw was tsumu calling him WHILE SAMU WAS ON A DATE to talk about the fact that you said tsumu was funny 😐)

when he came back tsumu was holding your hand like (´∀｀)♡

anywayz

tsumu just adores you!!

he loves that he can just pick you up and engulf you in giant hugs bc ur so small to his 6 foot ass

since you guys are so close, he sees both sides of you! he cant choose a favorite!

because on one hand your quiet side can calm him down, make him relax and get more in tune with his emotions

and on the other hand your chaotic side matches his own, y’all are practically bouncing off the walls when you’re alone together

if you’re feeling particularly introverted, he’ll always be your voice! you want a drink? he’ll order it for you!! someone is standing in front of your locker? hey buddy scoot over!!

yknow tsumu isnt typically a huge fan of reading, but damn! your book recommendations? five stars

he even picked up his own copy of pride and prejudice 🥲

he loves watching you make art! whether it’s digitally or painting he sits behind you and watches your process like a hawk

“tsumu i’m just painting a tree” “😑 but how”

if you’re comfortable with it, atsumu would love to read your creative writing!

he swears that you’re the next big name in literature (going down in the high school english curriculum type shit 😌)

also little headcanon, you helped him bleach his hair 😫

he tried to convince you to do it with him

“tsumu no way” “just one little strip 🥺☝️”

now onto your zodiac signs! taurus and libra :)

your signs are hopeless romantics to the core. considering the origin of your relationship (straight out of a fanfiction) you both are sure you’ve been swept off your feet!

one thing you’re good at with atsumu is bringing out his inner feelings, which is not only healthy for him, but for your relationship as a whole

embracing the ugly parts of yourselves and each other is the key to making this relationship survive

and with personality types, isfp and entp, you guys naturally have very different views on the world

you’re more down to earth while entp atsumu is a little in the clouds

but your differences are what bring you together!!

atsumu inspires you to slow down and appreciate things for what they are while you teach him to get out of his head a bit :)

in the end, osamu hates you guys bc you’re so disgustingly cute

—

moodboard:

another dash of gold there, a splotch of brown there…

you were sitting quietly in your room, painting carefully on a peaceful afternoon. it was one of your favorite pass times and such a beautiful way to relax-

your thoughts were interrupted by the sound of your door opening quickly. you whipped around, watching as atsumu barely made it 5 steps into the room before collapsing on your bed, groaning loudly and dramatically.

you rolled your eyes playfully, turning back to your painting.

“im guessing practice wasn’t great?”

“no, i’m still the best.”

“that wasn’t what i said-“

“samu was just so irritating today, that’s why i came here.”

you make a small sound of acknowledgment, doing some finishing touches on your painting.

“i was reading that book you told me to,” atsumu spoke up.

“oh yeah?”

“yeah! pride and prejudice! i bought my own copy and everything!” you take a quick glance at him, giggling at the proud smile on his face.

“what do you think so far?”

“like what is ms. bennett doing? and caroline is bitch.”

“valid.”

“hey, what’re you doing?” you hear him sit up from behind you.

“wait, wait! it’s a surprise!” you angle yourself so he can’t see while you do one last flick of paint. “ok are you ready?” atsumu raises an eyebrow, not sure what to prepare himself for.

you turn the canvas around and watch his face change.

“BABE! YOU PAINTED ME?” you nod excitedly. he jumps up and attacks you with a tight hug. “you’re the sweetest, i love you.”

—

songs for your matchup :)

thank you again for requesting!! hope you enjoyed :)