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#also love that the tags are so diverse truly
saecookie · 2 years
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I posted 13 650 times 2022
817 more posts than 2021!
1 006 post created (7%)
12 644 post reblogged (93%)
Blogs I reblogged the most:
@katewalker
@gingerteaonthetardis
@gay-impressionist
@sunnibits
I tagged 9 821 posts in 2022
Only 28% of my post weren't tagged
#doctor who - 958 posts
#tolkien - 312 posts
#figure skating - 306 posts
#classic who - 274 posts
#kaamelott - 263 posts
#queer - 257 posts
#ff14 - 243 posts
#mass effect - 211 posts
#matrix - 210 posts
#gilmore girls - 189 posts
I sent 4 gifts in 2022!
My Top Posts in 2022:
n°5
Run Boy Run (x)
670 notes - publié le 11 octobre 2022
n°4
Thank god MIKA put the piano on FIRE
965 notes - publié le 14 mai 2022
n°3
No but the first one to say Ukraine won out of something else but sheer perfection, you don't understand. There are rules. As stated by the rules, Ukraine checked a lot of boxes:
A powerful, majestic start, maybe battle horn of some kind? using an old traditional folklore instrument adding a DJ who pretends to scratch breakdancer (in real life of course, this is thirty years old but in Eurovision, it will give your number a contemporary feel) Costumes! You need to look memorable, something that the viewers will notice Something everyone can connect to (love works, or motherhood can) You can break the rules of fashion and your chance to win shall grow Make it unforgettable and you will be the best and win the Eurovision Song Contest!
2 298 notes - publié le 15 mai 2022
n°2
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2 879 notes - publié le 8 septembre 2022
Mon billet n°1 en 2022
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Waiting for him
13 455 notes - publié le 8 septembre 2022
Obtenez votre année 2022 en revue sur Tumblr →
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legacygirlingreen · 6 months
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There’s been so much negativity lately I truly am sick of it. I have been feeling so drained. So instead of posting about it, I wanted to talk about some of the great things I’ve seen or experienced lately.
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First I want to shout out @eternalremorse for being the most supportive person I’d argue in the fandom. Forever reblogging everyone’s content, commenting, etc. you truly are such a welcoming and lovely friend
@localravenclaw for also being someone who supports almost every post with the tag Hogwarts legacy!
@writing-intheundercroft I adore our convos and your writing. I know you are such a talented and fun person and it’s so wonderful to have someone in the fandom who’s in a similar place as I am. You get how I feel about the current group and it’s so refreshing to not feel alone.
@animasola86 for being so absolutely sweet about their work, screenshots, and all around so kind! I am so excited to finish up this one shot and share the screenshots you did! You write some of the best spicy content for the fandom and are CRIMINALLY under rated!
@silverxstardust @darch7995 for our fun collabs we have done over the past year! You both are so sweet and the rocker AU will continue to live on (still working on part 3) !
@heyitszev for being a champion for enriching the content in this fandom and speaking out to gain some more diversity and inclusion. Thank you for your brilliant mind and your dedication to making a space that is authentically YOURS
@cuffmeinblack @blueraineshadows for continuing to upload again and again all your stories and sharing your talent with us! You both have continued to push this fandom to over ride their easily formed opinions on characters like Leander and push for more enrichment with ones like Andrew Larson!
@tamayula-hl @rednite-dork for being my personal favorite artists in the fandom! Your works - especially with aged up Sebastian continue to make my heart soar!
@kaylasallow @redd-jayy @ilovewritingfics @charisdoesntcare @finalgirllx @jeniffler @opalmoony @minmns and so many others for continually being blogs I see liking, commenting, and reposting my work! Having a steady flow of those who appreciate what I do helps me continue to find the energy to post 💚
I know there’s so many people I likely forgot but I just wanted to thank those in the Hogwarts Legacy Fandom for continuing to keep this a fun, expressive and lovely place. You ALL rock! Feel free to keep the chain of love going if you so please and I know I forgot people!
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tin-wufborf · 3 months
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Tin's Favorite Sterek Fics (Part 5)
Hi everyone! I am back from brink of death to bring you yet another platter of fic recs. Thank you all so much for you patience and for the continued love you all have shown these posts. I truly appreciate you all.
Also, just in case this has been bothering anyone: you will definitely see more author-diversity and newer fics as I work my way though my bookmarks. I'm working chronologically through my Sterek bookmarks from the oldest to the newest, so that means we're all currently reliving the early Sterek scene together while also getting to experience the moments where I would discover an author whose writing-style I particularly liked and then binged their entire body of work all at once before going back to the main tag's offerings (hence the large number of works by specific authors going on right now). Not sure if that bothered anyone, particularly the point about there being multiple fics from the same authors--people care about odd things sometimes, but I've seen discourse around this specific thing and would like to head it off at the pass--but I thought I'd make a statement about it because I was noticing it and was like "I wonder if this is bothering people...lemme speak on it". And now here we are!
Okay, enough yappin' from me. Let's do this!
List and links to previous/next part(s) below the cut.
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DISCLAIMER: This is me warning you all that some of the fics I've included in this list may cover explicit, dark, and/or "taboo" subject matters. I cannot express enough how little I care what anyone thinks about any of that; all I want is for you to use caution when reading anything I've listed here and to please review and heed whatever tags the authors have provided in order to keep yourselves safe. Your experience from this point on is your own responsibility, not mine and not the authors'.
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Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 | Part 4 | Part 5 | Part 6 | Part 7 | Part 8 | Part 9 | Part 10 | Part 11 | Part 12 | Part 13 | Part 14 | Part 15 | Part 16 | Part 17
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i'm just the same as i was (now don't you understand?) by paradis (T | 1/1 | 2,738)
"You're a virgin," Jackson says. "Everyone says you're a virgin." "Everyone but me," Stiles points out. More silence. Stiles thinks he can hear crickets chirping. "I'm kinda cold," he complains. "Well when were you not a virgin anymore?" Isaac asks, perplexed.
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by nightlights the children pray by hoars (T | 1/1 | 2,745)
Scott leaves for ten years and comes back.
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Nothing is as Bad as it Seems by paradis (T | 1/1 | 3,636)
“I know, it’s a shock,” he says. “But there’s more. Your friends– they’re werewolves. And that’s dangerous, Stiles. But I can keep them away!”
“I know they’re werewolves, you idiot!” Stiles shouts
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Stiles Stilinski's Knitting School for the Were, Other-Worldly and Supernaturally-Inclined by TypewriterLove (G | 1/1 | 3,789)
He'd trawled through online pattern directories, before finding something called Ravelry. Drumming his fingers against the desk, he'd hit the "register now!" button.
ScarletNerded's first action on their new account is to look up patterns with "wolf" keywords.
(In which Stiles ends up teaching the entire pack how to knit- which results in werewolves making socks. Alternatively named "Beacon Hills Stitch & Bitch")
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different definitions of good by preromantics (G | 1/1 | 4,259)
The one where Stiles has a fishy sort of excuse for not getting in a boat on the ocean. "Maybe I'm not really into the idea of getting caught by the coast guard on a stolen boat," Stiles says. Which, while not the reason Stiles definitely needs to stay behind, is also a pretty valid reason.
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No Destination by scottmcniceass (T | 1/1 | 5,043)
It's not like they're going anywhere in particular. They're just driving, getting away for a bit. Escaping everything. Together.
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Well Tempered by jsea (T | 1/1 | 5,290)
His fingers start moving almost of their own accord, and it feels easier suddenly. His fingers feel less clumsy, and the music that flows forth isn’t quite so somber anymore. It’s not the happy airy sound he wants so desperately to give to Stiles, but this feels right in its own way. More him. More them.
Or, the fic where Derek used to play piano, and he does again. But only for Stiles.
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we are tangled by drunktuesdays (T | 1/1 | 5,716)
"Derek was at your house?" "For like ten seconds," Stiles said. "I'd say it was weird, but is anything about Derek ever not weird?"
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can't be hateful, gotta be grateful by HalfFizzbin (T | 1/1 | 6,260)
"Be cool, Dad, we've decided to con Grandma."
(Or, the one where the Stilinski men drag Derek to Thanksgiving dinner at Grandma's and she gets the right wrong idea.)
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Flint and Tinder by rufflefeather (T | 1/1 | 6,781)
"Hi," a voice comes through and Derek really wishes it’d take more than that to know who it is.
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The Alpha to My Alpha by CupcakeGirlA (T | 1/1 | 10,717)
“Derek will kill you. He’ll tear you limb from limb!” Stiles says, scrambling away from him. The Alpha ambles closer.
“No, I don’t think he will,” the Alpha says. “I mean aside from killing a couple of hikers in his territory and doing him this favor, I haven’t really done anything to Hale. Once I’m gone he’ll probably be happy with the gift I’ve left for him.”
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Derelictions of Duty by Regann (T | 1/1 | 10,846)
No one wants to be the bearer of bad news to someone as nice as Sheriff Stilinski -- especially when he's your boss. That's why none of his employees want to be the first one to tell him about the scandalous goings-on between his only son and the former murder suspect Derek Hale. For all of their sakes, hopefully the Sheriff will find out all on his own...
(Or, 5 times a Beacon County Sheriff's Office employee witnesses the unique relationship between Stiles and Derek but neglects to tell the Sheriff and 1 time he witnesses it for himself.)
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Going, Going, Gone by paradis (M | 3/3 | 12,296)
The Sheriff comes up to him after the services. "I don't believe he's dead," he tells Derek.
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Promises aren't Meant to be Broken by paradis (T | 1/1 | 12,463)
“Thanks for saving me,” Stiles blurts out, staring up at Laura, wide eyed.
Laura grins. “I like you,” she says, “we’ll be friends.”
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powerful in-scent-ive by kellifer_fic (T | 1/1 | 14,533)
Stiles holds up a hand, because he really can't listen to the bites-are-all-right speech that Derek has given Scott dozens of times. "Dude, don't."
"Look-" Derek tries again, oddly persistent.
"Derek, man, my worst nightmare is not me getting bitten, it's him. It's always been him."
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Strangeness and Charm series by hoars (4 works | NR-M | 14,744)
The Gypsy AU
1. for the way this animal love, lurches monstrous up my chest (M | 1/1 | 2,481) “Strangeness follows the Romani, what is a little more?” Elder Travj asked. That was the night Derek’s pack began to follow the caravan; a night marked by fire and loss. 2. wanting to make you happy and warm and unafraid and free (M | 1/1 | 4,022) "Laura called you a thief." Derek breathes into his neck. "And what did the she-wolf call you?" Stiles asks. "She called me a gypsy." And Derek does not sound wronged. He sounds insecure and of longing. "Then perhaps she finally speaks truths." Stiles says. "I am a thief and you like me, a Roma." 3. these places will have to substitute (NR | 1/1 | 2,229) (Interlude) “The chovihano is harmless to Derek.” Mother says. “I assure you, Miss Laura, Stiles would not hurt Derek.” The shaman says. “Stiles cares greatly for your brother.” But still. Something in her is screaming, howling and growling. 4. for the grunts and the screams we extract from each other (NR | 1/1 | 6,012) It doesn't make sense for the lunatic to be eating people but biting others. All evidence but for the mass grave indicated the lunatic had been recruiting, building a pack, not finding a meat source. Werewolves, even lunatics, weren't prone to cannibalism. “It's a true sign of madness.” Derek says, as if repeating something he’s heard a dozen times since he was a child. "The mark of the beast."
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You Make Me See How Much I Have by paradis (T | 1/1 | 16,943)
“You’re lucky you got here now,” he says, “Ten minutes – maybe you could get your –” there’s a crash before he can say get your daughter, and Stiles resists the urge to either slap his hand against his face, or slap Derek, because no one ever understands how difficult it is to have a kid in the store by themselves unless they’re also parents.
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Past Imperfect, Future Conditional series by elisera (3 works | T-E | 17,311)
1. Necessitate by (E | 1/1 | 3,888) Derek’s juggling the kids -- Noah hanging off his back, Ella standing on his foot while holding onto his jeans with a death grip and both of them still talking up a storm about their day at kindergarten -- and two bags of groceries in his arms that evening when the sight of Stiles standing in the backyard makes him weak in the knees. Stiles is in profile, ranting on his phone to Scott about the contract negotiations for the new construction on the Peterson property, and there’s a flush on his face, his ears pink and his mouth red from where he keeps biting it but the worst thing, the absolute worst thing is the round curve of his stomach, straining against the tank top he liberated earlier in the week from Derek when the heat wave hit and none of his own fit him anymore. It’s going to be stretched to hell by the time the kid is born but right now Derek can’t find it in himself to care. 2. The Weapon You Choose (E | 1/1 | 12,029) When Noah trudges down the backstairs that morning, he finds Dad sitting on a step halfway down and chewing on his knuckles, watching Papa making coffee like it’s a special on the discovery channel and not an almost daily ritual. Anyway, Noah needs the car on Friday; he might as well make nice so he sits down next to Dad, jostling his shoulder with his own in greeting. Dad raises an eyebrow, mirth in his eyes and his mouth curving around the knuckle stuck in it. Papa grunts just then, still trying and failing to open the tin with the ground coffee in it and Dad head snaps around, once again riveted. Noah rolls his eyes hard but he guesses people who’ve been together since the dawn of time need to get their fun wherever they can find it. 3. Pancake Wolves (T | 1/1 | 1,394) Stiles is on his third cup of coffee when Derek tromps down the stairs. He looks at him over his shoulder, taking in his barely open eyes and the pillow creases on his face, unable to keep from smiling at him. Derek yawns widely and just keeps going until he can wrap his arms tightly around Stiles’ waist and lean against his back, letting Stiles take his weight.
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Jurisdiction series by elisera (3 works | T-E | 19,897)
1. Jurisdiction (M | 1/1 | 7,025) John is a pretty level-headed guy. He wasn’t always, back during his own Sturm und Drang period, but he married a firecracker of a woman and got a kid with an affinity for trouble like he got payed for ending up in it, so someone had to level out or they would’ve ended up living in a treehouse or Lapland doing god knows what. Anyway, getting a hold of his temper is one of John’s better life achievements. It makes him a good sheriff and it kept him from blowing his lid too badly those last two years when Stiles started acting out in a way that John had never seen before. But the temper is still there. He’s reminded of it when he comes home on a random Saturday in March after spilling his milkshake all over his uniform shirt only to notice he didn’t have a spare in the station and finds Stiles bend over the kitchen sink with hunched shoulders. 2. Life With Werewolves: A Beginner's Class (T | 1/1 | 2,836) Five times Sheriff Stilinski was really through with werewolves and one time he wasn’t. 3. Life With Humans: The Stilinski Edition (E | 1/1 | 10,036) “You still smell weird,” Derek says, pressing his nose against Stiles’ armpit, trying to figure out what about Stiles’ scent still bothers him so much. Stiles slaps his head and Derek nips the soft skin of his inner bicep in retaliation. “I,” Stiles says, still panting and shivering from his orgasm, “do not smell weird, you weirdo. Maybe you should take your nose in for a checkup, it’s clearly out of whack.”
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red series by hoars (3 works | NR-E | 32,156)
1. Festival of Red (E | 1/1 | 11,592) “See? I need my daisy crown or I won’t get Chased.” Stiles frowned. “And then I’ll have to do it again next year. I really don’t want to do it twice.” The good and the bad of getting Caught this year included not having to do it again and the bad was he’d have a werewolf mate for the rest of his life. Stiles is seventeen. He has a lot of life to live. Unless his wolfy mate has no sense of humor or a temper. Those with no sense of humor and tempers tended to hate Stiles the most and wouldn’t that suck? Being tied to someone for the rest of his life who hates him. That actually sounds like his type of luck. “You’ll be fine.” Allison beams because she’s a sweet person and can obviously read Stiles like a picture book aimed at toddlers. 2. Navigating our Marriage (NR | 1/1 | 8,316) The squeal to the bride-hunting fic that involves moving, emancipation, a family feud, a baby shower, a list of reasons and a magic cat lady. 3. Families: Eternally Messy (NR | 1/1 | 12,248) The third installment to the bride hunting fic that now involves pregnancy then babies, adult looking responsibilities, epic fails and proof no one picks their family.
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killerandhealerqueen · 2 months
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It's Love Letters Night! Send love and positivity to some of your favorite writers and bloggers!
@hyperbolicgrinch Jaz!!! You truly are my hype woman no matter the fandom and I am so grateful to have met you when Killer and Healer was airing because honestly, you really brighten up my day. Also, I really like your writing, even though we may not be in the same fandoms, and starting the ✨ weekend wip exposure club ✨ with you and Holly was so much fun
@theotherwhybietoldmeso Holly! My beloved! I know we only became friends this year but I am so grateful to have met you! You and Jaz are truly like the MVPs for dealing with me during this time of f1 hyperfixation (which I love, don't get me wrong) and hearing your nice feedback in the tags is always something to look forward to. Also, your fic ideas are so interesting and diverse and I love seeing the different fandoms you write for because of our ✨ weekend wip exposure club ✨
@clawbehavior Claw! My beloved! I know we're no longer in the same fandom, but it's always so fun to read your meta and tags and also see what sort of fanfictions you can come up with just from a simple post, drawing, or gifset. Your mind works a lot like mine creatively so it's so cool to see how your fics/ideas for fics come together and I'm always honored whenever you tag me in your fic ideas or come to me for advice with your fics. Truly so glad we met
@ahhhnorealnamesallowed Billie!!! Thank you for always being my sounding board for whenever I need someone to talk to about my fics because it's so easy to bounce ideas back and forth with you and you're always willing to be my second pair of eyes whenever I'm just fucking done with a fic. Also, thank you for always encouraging my ideas and for thinking that they're not too ambitious (because sometimes I worry that they are). So grateful to have met you when Killer and Healer was airing
@fourth-quartet Took! I know we really don't share fandoms anymore but it's always a delight to see you on my dash talking about things you're passionate about. Also, I really love your writing and will always support you in whatever you decide to write. I'm so glad we became friends when TDJ was airing
@kpopfantasywriter Jiejie! I know I haven't really come to you with fic ideas like I used to, but it's always so much fun to brainstorm fic ideas with you and it's always fun to read your little snippets that you sometimes post to the discord (I'm also very honored to be an OC in your fic, it's a lot of fun). Thank you for always sending me fic ideas/prompts and talking about fics with me, both on here and in the discord. I don't remember when we met but I'm really glad we became friends and have the relationship that we do
@dangermousie Mousie! I know you're not a writer but my god are you one of my favorite bloggers, I love your meta on different dramas and I feel like I'm watching them through you, which is a lot of fun because I get exposed to dramas that I would never actively seek out myself. Your commentary is also so fucking funny and makes me snort because I'd probably be saying the same damn thing too
@seonghwacore Ann! My baby! I know you don't write as much anymore but you are one of my favorite gifmakers and calling you my friend and my baby is like...just everything. Your gifsets for Killer and Healer were (and still are) legendary and your skills have only improved for Ateez and I'm proud to watch you grow. You're doing great, sweetie!
@nineninepetals Nine! I know you're not online as much anymore, but you deserve to be on this list and get this notification because I need you to know that you were and still are one of my biggest Killer and Healer cheerleaders and getting comments in my inbox both on here and on ao3 from you with a full on book report of your reaction to my fics is just...everything. I miss you and hope you are doing well and just know that I'm always thinking of you and I hope you come back to us one day
@marulo Maru! I also know that you're not online as much anymore, but I just wanted to let you know that I love you and miss you and hope you're doing well. You were also one of my biggest cheerleaders for my Killer and Healer fics and were always so supportive. I hope you're doing well and please just know that I miss you and I hope you come back to us one day
@evil-moonlight Jin! Of course you're on this list too! You're always so supportive of my fics and you're also just my biggest cheerleader in general and I really really appreciate you. Your writing is also super good and I hope you write more because damn girl you made feel things
@tytangfei Jina! The one who got me into Killer and Healer! Thank you for doing that, honestly, because that drama truly has changed my life and writing fanfiction for them as been both an honor and a dream. Also, your gifsets for Killer and Healer *chefs kiss*. Truly. They're the reason I got into the drama in the first place. Also, your writing...I hope you write more for them because your writing is so good...
@bestbuds55 Dana! I couldn't forget you too! Your writing is so good. I re-read your Killer and Healer fics all the time but have never dabbled into your Hannibal ones so I need to do that because the premises for them sound so interesting so I know I'm in for a treat
@mishathewtf Mish! Can't forget you either! You truly brighten both my dash and the discord both with your hilarious Killer and Healer memes (truly I think I've spat water while looking at them) as well as your other hyperfixations. Also, it's so fun playing those different games with you over discord because 1) they're interesting and something that I'd never actually play on my own and 2) they're just fun to play with others. Also, I have to thank you for being willing to put on LEGO Lord of the Rings over discord to help me calm my super bad anxiety...it really meant a lot and I know I told you at the time, but...I still think about it sometimes and it warms my heart
@sunriseverse Corset! Of course you're on here too! I love talking with you about fics and listening to you rant about your sunrise verse and honestly the work that you put into that thing is just...mind-boggling. It's so cool, honestly. Also, I love your fics for Couple of Mirrors and I'm so glad you wrote them because they are some of my faves (cuz I love that drama). Also, sending fic/writing questions back and forth to you is just so much fun, I love picking your brain about writing
@okifyouinsist Girl, I couldn't forget you. I know we've only been mutuals for such a short time, but you really have become my cheerleader in the f1 fanfic world and that really means a lot that you get so hyped over my little snippets that I post. I hope that our friendship can strengthen and that we'll be friends for a really long time
@friendlynbhddevil Sammy! I know we only became friends recently, but your love for Killer and Healer is almost as unmatched as mine, like we truly match each others freaks when it comes to those boys. I also love seeing you lose your mind over Beyond Evil cuz I too lost mine damn mind over that show...ugh, I'm just so glad we're friends. You really do brighten up my dash
Also, I know there are so many others who I'd love to put on this list, but then I'd practically be listing all of my mutuals so if your name is not on this list, please just know that I love you, I think about you, and you make my life so much better because you're in it
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thealogie · 3 months
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I'm curious to know your opinion on this. When it comes to JKR, she's obviously been cancelled for years. I saw people pressured to throw away old copies of her books, encouraged not to talk about the characters anymore or even not to buy unofficial merch, because even if she wouldn’t gain any financial benefit from it, her name and the story she wrote will still be relevant. For years it has been said that you’re a horrible person if you don’t completely detach yourself from HP. So why is the reaction into the good omens fandoms exactly the opposite? Why are there hundreds of posts in the Gaiman tag saying “remember you can still love GO”? Or even “even if Gaiman turned out to be a horrible person, he still made the world more beautiful with his works”? I don’t get it. I would never support a potential rapist and I’d expect the fandom to cancel him. And instead? For many fans the main concern seems to be to reiterate that people are still allowed to enjoy GO. I’ve seen people concerned about season 3. Why? Is it because Gaiman literally did the bare minimum in terms of representation? It’s ridiculous because Gaiman isn’t a great ally, he never was. Why are people so willing to give this man the benefit of the doubt?
I do think it’s because all of his shows were filled with gay, trans, and racial diversity that people are more hesitant to cut ties. And in the case of GO specifically people feel conflicted because I t’s also Terry work and half of us came at it from being Terry fans and never liked Neil lol.
In any event, I HAVE seen those “you can still enjoy the work” posts but I have also seen some people saying they will disengage and don’t want to give him money, and that’s heartening. And even the majority of the people saying “you can still love this thing” (as much as it honestly rubs me the wrong way and makes me go “NOT the point right now”) do also say they believe the allegations and I truly believe people are just young and having very emotional reactions right now.
I think once we let the worst of the discourse play itself out, we will get to a point where we can all agree that AT MINIMUM we cannot be causing him to make any money or boost his work.
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Why the World Needs Black Jack Randall: Queer Representation at Its Worst and Best
On March 29 my amazing mutual and fellow Evil Redcoat Pipeline traveler @meerawrites tagged me in a reblog of this video essay from @rowanellis about media literacy and queer villains that mentions both Lestat de Lioncourt from Interview with the Vampire and Black Jack Randall from Outlander. Double bisexual representation from an openly ace creator? Be still my heart!
I’d seen a few of Rowan’s other videos on YouTube—not ever having looked for her on Tumblr before Meera sent me that video—and often enjoyed both the content and the nuance. Certainly true for many aspects of this one as well. I want to make it very clear before going into detail here that I ardently support Rowan as a creator and appreciate that advocacy for diverse queer representation tremendously. I’m tagging her blog here primarily to promote her work and to encourage folks to explore for themselves. Her video essays are excellent in general and this one certainly has its fair share of wonderful content just the same.
I love the analysis here of why queer villains often get embraced as folk heroes by the LGBTQIA+ community, and many of the specific commentaries on beloved characters from iconic films and shows I grew up on like The Rocky Horror Picture Show and The Lion King. Of course, I’m no expert on any of those canons despite many viewings. I don’t consider myself an expert on Interview with the Vampire by any means either, but I’ve read all the books and seen the film and the available season of the new television adaptation. I found a lot of the commentary here insightful and resonant as a more casual consumer of media in that universe. I fully expect that folks who truly do have that depth of expertise would have much to say about the specifics of Rowan’s analysis of Lestat.
If y’all are on my blog, you know why I’m here and you know where my expertise lies. I am here to sustain the collective derangement of the few and the proud who take a deeper interest in Black Jack. Who see him for the complex and complicated person he is rather than writing him off as a Complete Monster or hand waving the things he does that truly are monstrous. And oftentimes who take that deeper look at him from the informed perspective of lived experience with sexual abuse. Many of the folks I’ve met who find Black Jack uniquely resonant and compelling do so from the firsthand perspective of submissiveness and masochism—of finding him alluring because of what he could do for them.
Well then. You could fix him. You could make him worse. I could rail him.
I’m going to out myself in no uncertain terms here because I need to make my authorial standpoint painstakingly clear. Hi, my name is Malicious Compliance. In addition to being quite openly bisexual in every possible area of my life, I am Dominant and sadistic. Are those the only things I enjoy sexually? Not at all. Although I’m not switchy in the slightest when it comes to D/s and S&M activities, I absolutely enjoy sex that does not involve BDSM elements as well. I’ve also had intensely kinky sexual relationships that involved no physical practice of sadism whatsoever. This will come back later—just like Black Jack does at Versailles in S2E05 “Untimely Resurrection” after supposedly being dead from a cattle stampede at Wentworth Prison. Awesome, right? Like me, our favorite randy Redcoat is tough to kill.
Given all this and my general level of immersion in all forms of Outlander canon, once I finally could make the time to give Rowan’s video essay my full attention (more on that below) I found myself going from pumping my fist to shaking my head. I knew I’d have to say something in response. That I would need to address the Republic and set the record accurate if certainly not straight.
Initially I thought about doing a brief reblog commentary noting that although the analysis in the video gets several things quite twisted about Randall, these are understandable omissions considering Rowan does not position herself as having intensive expertise on Outlander canon. But then I started thinking about Rowan’s stated purpose in making the video. The sorts of deeper analysis and nuances that, as Rowan herself points out in her own ways, often get missed with intent in considering the actions of queer villains who are specifically bisexual and sadistic.
And as a bisexual sadist who has frequently encountered the framing of my own sexuality as an automatic threat even by other queer people who otherwise support kink practice I knew it could enhance the positive impact of the original video essay to provide some detailed commentary. Broader systemic issues that Rowan references herself can make it altogether too easy to reproduce the same harms one looks to dismantle. Black Jack Randall is a fictional guy in a fictional world. Yet how the non-fictional world views people like Black Jack—and especially people brought to those dark places in their own minds and actions by their familiar cycles of abuse—matters tremendously to me. Not because I’ve gone down his path myself, but because I understand the stakes of not going down his path.
One thing about me is I would rather pull out what remains of my natural dentition with pliers than take no action when I know I can do something uniquely impactful in addressing that passive reproduction of harm to our community, which very much is our community as both bisexual and asexual creators. In the interest of directly unpacking harmful stereotypes about bisexual sadists, building on the video essay’s overall spotlighting of queer villains and some of the specific ways biphobia factors into those characterizations and storylines, I’m taking this deepest of dives. Doing more. Because it’s my brand, certainly. But moreover because it’s my duty.
As blazingly gay Will Tavington so eloquently stated in The Patriot amid some premium sinister flirting with his enemy Ben Martin: It’s an ugly business doing one’s duty. But just occasionally, it’s a real pleasure.
So here, point by point from my own manual transcription of Rowan’s comments—using both the audio and captions for the video to ensure full accuracy, y’all know both my style and my propensity for em dashes—I give you a detailed analysis of the analysis. If you’re envisioning me gesturing wildly at a tangled yarn map like the Pepe Silvia conspiracy theory one from It’s Always Sunny in Philadelphia then you’ve got the measure of things entirely. Much more this energy here than the XKCD angle of Someone is wrong on the Internet. Indeed, I’d say Rowan is very right on the Internet to open this dialogue and provide folks who’ve made this depth of engagement with various characters referenced in this video the opportunity to build on her own insights.
But “duty calls” nonetheless! Happy Culloden Day to all ye Randallites near and far. Have fun and try not to get disemboweled too much.
Across the seven seasons of Outlander, a drama about a World War II nurse who travels back to 1740s Scotland—I know, don’t question it—perhaps the most loathed character amongst the show’s many villains is Captain Jonathan Randall.
The phrasing here made me reflect with sorrow on how that same premise of time travel elements automatically making something not worthwhile for reasons of implausibility—and thus perceived frivolity—has often made others pass on exploring Outlander at all. It also made me wonder, as many other things in the video essay continue to do, if perhaps the commentary draws on familiarity with only the first season of the show despite Black Jack’s storyline extending into the third season in live action and beyond that in impact. That would seem a lost opportunity considering the depth of analysis of other canons like Interview with the Vampire and Hazbin Hotel here. Both of which I highly recommend for folks who’ve not yet had the pleasure!
I also noted how the video essay makes no mention whatsoever of Randall’s canonical nickname of “Black Jack” anywhere, which seems strange given what a major plot point this becomes right from the start in S1E01 “Sassenach”. I see this as a missed opportunity to get into some of the basic nuances here about his sadism, which itself only gets mentioned minimally despite the surrounding context. The video essay sets Randall up as a sadist with the framing of this segment but then doesn’t really connect those dots. I’ve done that for y’all before with my “Red Black and Shades of Gray” meta comparing sadism themes in Outlander and The Patriot canons, which contrasts the former’s frequent depiction of sexual interest in actions causing intentional pain in Black Jack Randall’s actions with the latter’s depiction of strategic interest in actions producing incidental pain in Will Tavington’s.
Speaking of the Outlander and The Patriot contrast between the canons’ respective evil Redcoat characters, I had some notes jotted down in the background of my various in-progress BJR fics that explores canonical nicknames for Randall and Tavington and what these monikers lampshade about their respective characterizations. I also had another meta in much more primal stages of development exploring rape themes in both canons and the nuances of how sexual violence gets invoked in storylines featuring Randall and Tavington. That phrasing is very deliberate for good reason; Will Tavington doesn’t rape anyone. And Randall’s own sexual violence doesn’t play out remotely the way one might think from watching this video. Apropos of this, I had another meta envisioned about homosociality in Outlander and how Randall’s bisexuality makes him an outcast among straight and queer characters alike—inspired of course by a dear mutual exploring similar themes with Tavington in The Patriot canon.
In the first of what became many drafts of this Very Long Essay, I said “it will probably be quite some time until I get any of these finished” and then spent a few days turning that over in my head. Indeed, the process of drafting this piece to encourage readers to peek behind the curtain of Black Jack Randall’s life has necessarily involved some deeper reflection on things behind the curtain of my own life. Including how I still—at 40 unlikely years old and counting—often do things out of feelings of obligation rather than genuine desire.
Did I mention I’m a rape survivor? And that I couldn’t possibly count how many times I’ve let someone take dozens of “no” signals as a “yes” because of what it would cost me to refuse? It’s okay to enjoy certain aspects of fandom casually. Even if one isn’t already doing tons of other activity that’s anything but casual. Let yourself enjoy things. This world robs us of so much joy even when we try with all our might to protect it, to hold onto it. I am begging all of you to let yourself enjoy things before it’s too late. To do what Randall didn’t in canon—to live, and to stop willfully breaking his own heart.
If you read my blog, you know that this year has been an absolute hellscape on many fronts and that I am constantly slammed with even more of a professional overload than usual while dealing with A Lot in both the mental and physical health domains. And I generally publish at least one novella-length transformative work for Outlander each month on top of that. As a good friend put it: If I had a full-time job and had the energy to volunteer on top of that, I don’t think I’d ever write. I do what I do not because it is good for me, but because I am certifiably insane. This is not hyperbole or satire. I easily qualify for the designation per the DSM. Which has faults in spades and I’m not endorsing in the slightest, mind. My point is that I write not because I have the time or the energy to spare, but rather because if I do not write I will feel as if I cannot breathe. Why? Asked and answered.
So, a note for the good of the order: I can wait a long, long time before I write another fandom essay. This is a Sisters of Mercy reference, because of course it is. I’m writing this response to the video essay instead of finishing development on the fic I otherwise could probably have released for the Battle of Culloden anniversary on April 16. Ideally I would have done both, wouldn’t I? In addition to already releasing the prior installment of that continuity on April 13 no less! Perhaps if I’d just tried harder I could’ve given you two different lengthy writings in honor of the specific day. Or at least released something else on AO3 for April without waiting until the last minute like a slacker.
That’s the kind of thinking that made me stop sleeping entirely and wind up having a complete breakdown both mentally and physically. For those who are new around here, this is an even worse idea for me than it is for most humans because of a progressive genetic disease that kills people on the regular even when they do sleep and eat adequately and generally show compassion for themselves.
Accordingly, that sort of thinking about my own self-worth as anything other than an ATM for other people’s consumption of output is also what made me complete a PhD in literally two years while working full-time and being actively in the process of dying from my disease. I got on a medication that saved my lungs and my life just over a year after defending my dissertation. It’s taken another decade to learn the lesson I should have learned back then. How did Annie Lennox put it? Dying is easy; it's living that scares me. Paging Black Jack Randall—because if that isn’t the absolute biggest Culloden energy I don’t know what is.
It is amazing and terrible what sadism can do when turned inward on a person. The original video essay I’m responding to here never quite got around to how masterfully Randall’s character spotlights this pattern in several ways. Because the video is much broader by design than it is deep, and thus does not allow for more thorough engagement of the source material in commenting on Black Jack’s character, a lot of the same tropes the video essay aims to unpack could get repackaged with new hats instead without these additional details. So in the interest of not sending people who aren’t bisexual sadists to do bisexual sadists’ jobs, I’m giving y’all the goods.
As a British captain in an occupied Scotland, Randall radiates pure villainy.
Does he? I’m not so sure at all. First, see here for details focused closely on Outlander itself. Second, see here for use of Black Jack’s storylines in Outlander as examples of a larger trope. Search both of those pages for “Even Evil Has Loved Ones” using your browser’s Find function and you’ll get some telling material. Catch that reference to the Duke of Sandringham and Mary Hawkins in the second link, did you? We’ll get to those in time. Oh, how we will get to those.
The complete lack of mention of Season 2 and especially the iconic BJR episode near the end makes this oversight unsurprising. I think touching on that content just briefly would have supported Rowan’s overall purpose in making the initial video. At the same time, I’m guessing that stimulating nuanced and enduring dialogue about queer villains is the most important aim of the original essay! Indeed, S2E12 “The Hail Mary” represents the absolute pinnacle of my plunge into permanent derangement about Randall for reasons likely obvious considering everything I’ve already shared about my own backstory in the process of waxing loquacious to fill in additional canonical details that didn’t feature in the referenced video essay here.
I promised that the notes about my own sexual proclivities would come back, did I not? As BJR is canonically known for doing, I always keep my word. Not hyperbole in the slightest for either of us. On Black Jack’s end this gets referenced explicitly by Claire in Book 2 / Dragonfly in Amber when she is helping Randall care for his dying brother Alex. It also gets demonstrated consistently by other characters and Randall himself throughout his storylines in both Season 1 and Season 2 of the show.
So indeed, one of the things I find most resonant about Black Jack is that he leans into whatever the other person in an encounter is giving him and bases his own behavior on that. This is made quite clear on the show in numerous ways—and arguably even clearer in the source novels by Diana Gabaldon, wherein we learn from Book 1 / Outlander that Black Jack frequently has trysts with domestic employees in the Scottish countryside.
Many people find Black Jack charming and handsome, to the point that he has a drawer full of perfume-scented love letters in his office at Fort William. Hilarious comic relief because he’d clearly have no reason for keeping those around other than masturbation fodder. Those of you who’ve circulated that meme about jerking off face down on the bed with the #black jack randall tag applied are entirely understanding the assignment.
For all the times he’s sexually assaulted someone—which seems to be countable on one hand for any person who isn’t Jamie himself, and near zero for anyone who isn’t associated with Jamie Fraser in some way—Randall has clearly had plenty of consensual sex with people who are not only willing but also entirely enthusiastic to get in his breeches. In the books we also learn about some rumors surrounding another prisoner named Alex MacGregor. These are never confirmed and it’s unclear even from the rumors themselves what the exact nature of Black Jack’s relationship with MacGregor was.
Why is this so important to highlight in analysis of queer villains? Here I go again quoting Carmen Maria Machado as I have before in both fic and commentary and surely will again: The world is full of hurt people who hurt people. Even if the dominant culture considers you an anomaly, that doesn’t mean you can’t be common, common as fucking dirt. This, friends, is the thesis of Black Jack Randall.
He shows little to no redeeming qualities, offers no sympathetic backstory to why he acts the way he does, and appears purely to have been driven by rage and violent pleasure.
Oh my. I’m going to leave S2E05 “Untimely Resurrection” and S2E12 “The Hail Mary” alone for the moment. But even in S1E06 “The Garrison Commander” and S1E15 “Wentworth Prison” we start to get some light shed on what Randall is really doing in Scotland. We learn by degrees later just how much his reasons for being there belie what we see on the surface. This gets expanded on in the books where the reveal on Randall’s benefactor the Duke of Sandringham being a secret Jacobite is much more detailed. But even on the show, we learn by S2E11 “Vengeance Is Mine” that Sandringham got outed as a suspected traitor to the Crown.
Goodness knows he's been outed as gay from the start to everyone but Claire, who didn’t learn this until much later after making the initial blunder of falling for Black Jack’s gambit about Sandringham having a wife. Not that this would have stopped him from being gay, of course. So-called “lavender marriage” was indeed relatively commonplace—and remains so now in some communities—both generally and in Outlander specifically. I’ll cover that in detail when we get to the points about Lord John Grey below. Notably for now, Sandringham rather than Randall himself is much more centered in a villain role in Season 2. And apropos of other content here, he absolutely doesn’t qualify for tropes about redeeming qualities. The extent of his monstrosity gets revealed in that same episode near the end of Season 2 when it comes to light that he ordered his valet Albert Danton to attack and rape his own goddaughter Mary Hawkins in an alleyway in Paris.
Even early in the series it thus seems difficult to consider Black Jack the most loathsome villain in Outlander. We’ll get to Mary in earnest—and the extreme tenderness with which Black Jack always treats her from their first meeting until his death at Culloden Moore—as we go along. For now, remember what Claire learned about Black Jack’s fate all the way back in S1E01 “Sassenach” where she and her husband Frank Randall were looking into his family genealogy in the Reverend Reginald Wakefield’s office at Inverness during their long-belated honeymoon. Some details missing there certainly, which only get revealed by degrees in Season 2. Black Jack really is Frank’s 5x great-grandfather though; he’s just not his only 5x great-grandfather.
I should probably mention here that I’m donor conceived and that I wasn’t told the truth… No, that’s putting it too kindly. I did note that I’ve always been quite dedicated to seeing the good in people who do bad deeds, and to working tirelessly to bring it out. But enough is enough. My parents lied to my face for 18 years about my ancestry. I asked them point-blank about it several times and they still told me lies. I finally got the truth out of my mother on a balcony overlooking an olive grove halfway around the world. The bus ride to get back to the nearest city and the airport were the longest four hours of my life. I never traveled with them again. And the hole inside of me never fully closed, and never will.
This too will resurface when I get to the content about Mary Hawkins and her marriage to Black Jack. I’m getting there, I promise. As my spouse once put it: I knew you were going to land the plane.
Getting back to early portions of Outlander canon and what we learn about Black Jack in Season 1 though, there’s also the iconic S1E08 “Both Sides Now” extended scene in which Black Jack gives Claire his own perspective on what he’s doing in Scotland in the first place and how distasteful he finds his work. How badly he wishes he could just go home and be warm and take a bath. How little he cares about the outcome of the conflict and how futile he feels it all is. We already know from a couple episodes prior that he loathes both the British aristocracy and his own superiors in the Army, who treat him like he’s lower than the dirt he then passive-aggressively shakes out all over their wardroom at Brockton. Including and especially his commanding officer Lord Thomas, a general who’s about as flamingly gay-coded as Will Tavington in The Patriot.
Oh, and speaking of being driven only by violent pleasure that is entirely incorrect—S2E02 “Not in Scotland Anymore” alone makes this perfectly clear. I’ve previously covered the finer details about Black Jack bottoming enthusiastically, and also enjoying gentler sexual experiences as well as rougher ones.
Black Jack’s interactions with Jenny in her flashbacks from S1E12 “Lallybroch” also shed light on this; once she goes inside the house with him, he only touches her with gentle curiosity until she bashes him over the head with a heavy object. Even then, he responds by…tossing her onto to the bed and getting partially undressed. When she starts laughing at him because he can’t get an erection (a telling piece of evidence of how Black Jack ultimately loses interest in sex if the other person doesn’t want it to at least some degree, or feel strong emotions about it that they’re willing to show) he panics and conks her head against the bedpost so he can flee without it being obvious that she chased him off.
Then there’s also the prior content from Book 1 / Outlander about the scented letters and the maids, some of which also comes back in Book 8 / Written in My Own Heart’s Blood when Roger Wakefield goes looking for Black Jack at Fort William after time traveling to 1739 a couple of weeks after Randall’s installation as commander there. I’ll come back to that a bit later given how much that scene reveals about Randall’s character and his reasons for being in Scotland.
And most of all, his villainy is compounded by the fact that he will rape, torture, and murder men and women alike—an equal opportunity monster.
Correct in essentials on the first two items as I cover elsewhere. Not so much on the third, though! In fact, the TV adaptation clarifies this beyond the information we get in the books. Whereas Book 1 / Outlander features murky rumors about Randall possibly killing one of his own soldiers at Fort William so he can pin the murder on Jamie, show canon makes little of this and indeed offers several opportunities to see Black Jack deliberately not killing people who attack him.
Nowhere is this clearer than in the final episode where he appears, S3E01 “The Battle Joined”. In that Culloden-centric episode, we watch Randall get fully pulled from his horse by a group of Scots warriors who then proceed to attack him. Up to that point Black Jack has just been shooing people away from his horse by swinging his cavalry saber in the air. Once on the ground, he basically just elbows his way out of the cluster of Jacobite soldiers and makes a beeline for Jamie instead.
Then of course there’s also Black Jack’s aggrieved, hesitant behavior at Wentworth Prison in S1E16 “To Ransom a Man’s Soul” right before the cows show up to give him the business. Although Randall is well known for keeping his word, even by people who despise him absolutely, he looks defeated and anxious when Jamie reminds him that he owes him the debt of taking his life ahead of the gallows in exchange for finally “[making] free of [his] body” (see S2E02 “Castle Leoch”) in the night. Jack takes out a dagger and sort of swings it around idly—with a look on his face that can only be described as “Really?” Any playfulness remaining there seems to come from Black Jack eyeing Jamie’s nude body and thinking about what else he might do with the blade besides killing him.
Randall has a zero kill count onscreen in the television show. I’d be remiss not to note here how this places him behind even his own eventual wife Mary Hawkins, often heralded quite accurately as one of the characters in Outlander who comes closest to embodying pure goodness. But of course, the trauma of sexual violence can twist a person’s mind horribly. I might know just a little about this myself. And it only takes one experience, more so given the horrifying context outlined in S2E11 “Vengeance Is Mine”. Like anyone else, Mary has the capacity for brutal violence herself if pushed sufficiently far. I consider it something of a miracle I never went that route myself considering my own experiences can scarcely even be counted in any meaningful way. I can only think in terms of years. Seven of them whose shadows will never fully retract. When I say Black Jack and Mary were a perfectly arranged marriage, it isn’t for nothing.
We’ll get to her in earnest, I promise! Of course, I’ve already covered that ground in fiction before.
Randall makes his monstrous mark on Season 1 by sexually assaulting both of the show’s protagonists, Claire and Jamie.
Correct in essentials, but potentially a false equivalence. I’m not sure how much the video essay was intended to set the assaults on Jamie and Claire up as direct mirrors of one another. There is however a common thread here worth pulling out: How in Season 1 Black Jack only goes through with assaulting people who show at least some sexual interest in him.
Randall assaults three people in Season 1 overall: Claire in S1E01 “Sassenach” and S1E08 “Both Sides Now”; Jenny in flashbacks from S1E02 “Castle Leoch” and S1E12 “Lallybroch”; and Jamie in S1E15 “Wentworth Prison” and S1E16 “To Ransom a Man’s Soul”. He also propositions Claire and Jamie together in S1E09 “The Reckoning” in an echo of propositioning Jamie individually in the S1E02 “Castle Leoch” flashback. But of the three people he assaults, only two respond with any sustained evidence of interest amid their anger and indignation.
The hateful attraction Jamie feels for Black Jack has been flogged—to borrow Frank’s phrasing about press coverage of Claire’s mysterious disappearance and return from S2E01 “Through a Glass, Darkly”—almost as badly as the man’s own back by this point. So I won’t belabor that here except to say it’s entirely nonrandom that Jamie keeps enticing Black Jack into further conflict after recovering from the brutal assaults at Wentworth and discovering Randall alive in Paris. He’s still having horny nightmares over two decades later about everything from weird group therapy scenarios with shamans on misty mountains (not hyperbole, see Book 6 / A Breath of Snow and Ashes for the goods) to fighting a totally naked Black Jack at Culloden and winding up covered in his “hot, hot blood” while they lie on the ground in a clinch (see Book 9 / Go Tell the Bees That I Am Gone for that especially choice sequence) and exhausting Claire’s patience so badly in rehashing these that he eventually resorts to rambling about the dreams to Jenny instead.
What doesn’t tend to come out as much in analysis of the TV series is the key plot point from Book 1 / Outlander that Claire feels attracted to Black Jack because of his resemblance to Frank. Not just in appearance, but also in certain mannerisms and pleasures—see the shaving scene from S1E06 “The Garrison Commander” and Claire’s flashbacks to shaving Frank thusly with the very same razor, for example. Little surprise then how in Book 1 / Outlander she specifically mentions feeling “compelled to open [her] legs for him” when he ties her hands behind her back at Fort William in the equivalent sequence to later portions of S1E08 “Both Sides Now”.
By her own admission this latent attraction-by-association does not wane entirely until after she and her friends rescue Jamie from Wentworth Prison at the end of Season 1. After that point, things go the other way. Although Claire spends Season 2 in an odd state of détente with Black Jack himself, even after the events of S2E07 “Faith” for which neither she nor Jamie explicitly blame Jack, she initially feels afraid of Frank when she reconnects with him back in the 20th Century as seen in S2E01 “Through a Glass, Darkly”. Why mention this here? That fear only subsides when Claire sees how much Frank treasures being a father to Brianna, the child she conceived with Jamie before going back through the stones to her own time. Indeed, later installments of the book series also show Claire deliberately striving for accuracy in her remembrances of both Frank and Black Jack as complicated men who were capable of deep love.
Scuffling is also arousing for Black Jack. Although the shaving scene demonstrates that this isn’t the only sort of physical pleasure he enjoys, he certainly gets a kick out of it regardless. So Claire’s willingness to scrap with him—including when she literally gives him a kick to the testicles with her knee in S1E01 “Sassenach” after he pins her to the ground in the forest—heightens the arousal and feels like play to him. Contrast this with Jenny’s incredulous laughter and complete unwillingness to take the fight further after hitting him over the head with a blunt object to get him to back off.
Does this take any of Randall’s actions out of the territory of assault? Nope. But it does provide a context to his motivations. Although his means of seeking affection are entirely warped, at the end of the day Black Jack really is after human connection. I’m entirely in agreement with other Outlander fans who’ve mentioned wanting a companion series about the Randall family. I have my own ideas about that history that I’ve referenced in transformative works. I would also love to see Gabaldon’s own perspective on what damaged Black Jack’s psyche so badly.
Finally, Randall’s treatment of women often differs from his treatment of men just in general. By his own admission in S1E06 “The Garrison Commander” he is “not a casual person with women” usually. He says this while expressing regret for how he treated Claire in the woods outside Craigh Na Dun. Which is very genuine per his actor’s own comments about playing the character; Tobias Menzies has mentioned in interviews that Black Jack always believes whatever he’s saying fully in the moment.
Something to note about Black Jack in general is that he will express regret and then claim he doesn’t feel it. This is probably quite accurate considering Jack shows a lot of signs of dissociation and may not feel much of anything most of the time. We see an example of this simultaneous expression and negation of regret in S2E12 “The Hail Mary” during the sequence at the tavern. And although the meaning of Randall’s comment about not being casual initially seems ambiguous, we get the reveal on it entirely in that same episode via the dynamic between Black Jack and Mary Hawkins. He takes her well-being and her safety so seriously that he’d rather die than risk any chance of hurting her.
Of course, his brandy-soaked mind isn’t realizing that she’ll get hurt far worse if he does die. We see enough in both book and show canon to understand how Black Jack treated Mary in life. Even that single moment where he enters the room at the boarding house says a lot; his entire face lights in a genuine smile that reaches his eyes as soon as she looks at him. The interactions between the two of them are some of the most delicate and tender moments of the entire season.
These sequences also provide some context for the different handling of the moments after Alex’s death. In the Book 2 / Dragonfly in Amber version of this sequence Black Jack is crying and so drunk he can barely stand, whereas in episode S2E12 “The Hail Mary” he’s more lucid and vacillates between catatonic silence and a harrowing moment of punching his brother’s cadaver. Calls back to Claire’s comment in S1E02 “Castle Leoch” about how “there’s no joy in flogging a dead man” because of course this wasn’t about joy. Black Jack is entirely devastated, both for himself and for Mary. And although Mary herself looks pained at seeing this unfold, and clings to Claire in response, she looks more heartbroken than afraid. Her depth of emotion in that moment contrasts clearly with her apathy at gazing upon Danton’s dead body and Sandringham’s decapitated corpse back at his Bellhurst Manor estate (or Belmont House depending on which version of canon one consults) in the previous episode.
Finally and perhaps relatedly, I should spotlight Black Jack’s “I choose the whore” comment from S1E01 “Sassenach” about his own taste in women. Although part of an ironic commentary on the juxtaposition of Claire’s accent and vocabulary with her ample use of profanity, this also tells us a fair amount about Randall’s overall attitudes toward class. We learn in other portions of canon such as S2E06 “Best Laid Schemes” and various sequences in the first two books that Randall visits sex workers and that there aren’t lurid rumors swirling around about his treatment of feminine prostitutes. Black Jack’s sexual antagonism toward other men is more intense by design.
Randall’s queerness is a weapon that he wields indiscriminately.
Not really. That would be his dick. Randall generally doesn’t go through with assaulting people who don’t show any sexual interest during the initial scuffle. In fact, he can’t even get aroused physically when the other person isn’t fighting him in a horny way. Even when the person is somewhat horny it still doesn’t work for Randall unless their level of arousal is high. We see this with the assault on Claire during S1E08 “Both Sides Now” and especially in the equivalent scene from Book 1 / Outlander.
The only exception to this is an assault that happens during Season 2—which definitely seems like a missed opportunity to mention in direct parallel to the reference to preying on children in Rowan’s analysis of Lestat from Interview with the Vampire. During the S2E06 “Best Laid Schemes” chronology later revealed in full during S2E07 “Faith” Randall assaults Claudel, a boy who either pickpockets or works (depending on whether one goes with the show or book version of the canon backstory) at the Maison Élise brothel in Paris.
On the show it’s clear that he does this specifically to get Jamie to fight him; he knows Jamie is on the premises collecting debts and that Claudel has been walking around with him. Sure enough, upon hearing Claudel scream Jamie comes bursting into the room, hauls Black Jack into the hallway, and proceeds to beat the daylights out of him. The look of delight on Randall’s face at seeing him appear and subsequently getting pummeled by him leaves little doubt as to his objective in assaulting Claudel.
In Book 2 / Dragonfly in Amber the timing and particulars of this storyline differ substantially. But as in the show, Randall is canonically an alcoholic and gets progressively deeper into his cups throughout the Paris storyline and his brother’s subsequent health decline. At the brothel he’s so drunk he doesn’t know where he is, what is going on around him, or even seem to remember who he is. Given the greater development of intrigue in the books surrounding whether Randall had a sexual relationship with his younger brother Alex, it seems likely that the angle here is Black Jack somehow seeking Alex in a person who reminds him of his brother during his early adolescent years.
No one is safe.
Aren’t they? Here we go, then. Time for some detailed Mary Hawkins content at long last.
The basics: We learn all the way back in S1E01 “Sassenach” and equivalent sequences from Book 1 / Outlander that before dying at the Battle of Culloden, Black Jack Randall married someone named Mary Hawkins and that she later gave birth to a son named Denys. Claire encounters Mary Hawkins for the first time in France in S2E02 “Not in Scotland Anymore” and grows closer to her while having the vague sense that she knows that name from somewhere. It isn’t until learning in S2E03 “Useful Occupations and Deceptions” that Black Jack himself is still alive that Claire realizes where she’s seen Mary’s name before: Frank’s family bible during a meeting with the Reverend Wakefield.
At first glance, Mary is everything one wouldn’t expect in someone who’d eventually marry Black Jack—or at least Claire thinks so. She feels completely befuddled by how someone who seems so meek and timid could possibly end up with someone like Black Jack. This becomes all the more confusing for Claire in S2E04 “La Dame Blanche” when Mary is getting involved with Jack’s younger brother Alex, a curate who has accompanied his employer the Duke of Sandringham to Paris. After Claire and Mary are attacked in an alleyway at Sandringham’s behest, resulting in Mary getting raped by a mysterious assailant later revealed to be the Duke’s own valet Albert Danton, Alex cares for her—and then gets locked in the Bastille for his trouble. Claire wrestles with her conscience about whether to get Alex freed given her own knowledge of how Black Jack and Mary are supposed to wind up together if Frank is ever to be born at all.
Leave it to having half the information resulting in getting things half right, as often happens in Outlander and in life alike.
Mary has been leveling up her confidence throughout Season 2 and corresponding portions of Book 2 / Dragonfly in Amber while growing closer to both Claire and Alex. We don’t see onscreen how her social relationship with Black Jack himself evolves once he arrives in Paris—but in the TV series the two clearly know one another well already when Jack shows up at the boarding house in S2E12 “The Hail Mary”. In book canon the different pacing of events puts Black Jack’s wedding to Mary and Alex’s death earlier in the year, leaving a couple months until the Battle of Culloden. On the show Black Jack and Mary are only married for three days but have substantially more history with one another prior to their wedding. Blending the canons offers a portrait of two people uniquely poised to understand each other, united through their shared love of Alex but also oddly well matched on several other fronts.
Have I freeze-framed those sequences of S2E12 “The Hail Mary” that feature Mary and Black Jack interacting? Yes. Several times. Highly recommended for anyone who wants to plummet into that sort of derangement.
For the rest of you fine folk, the cocktail napkin summary here is that Mary represents both the shining gentleness that Black Jack so prizes in his younger brother—and I’d encourage anyone who still thinks of him as a Complete Monster to consider how Alex turned out so well in the first place given Jack is documented as the only member of their family who’s taken responsibility for his well-being—and the capacity for ruthless violence that Black Jack repeatedly points out in himself.
Here I should mention though that Black Jack remains as dedicated to veracity in this as in anything else. When he says “I dwell in darkness, madam—and darkness is where I belong” to Claire at Brockton in S1E06 “The Garrison Commander” he’s saying this as much to convince himself as to convince her. Ditto his comments to her at the tavern, most of all the haunting question: “Do you really want Mary in my bed?” Where exactly would she be safer than with someone who has consistently treated her like gold, who looks at her as if the sun shines directly from her face, and who would move mountains to honor his beloved brother’s wishes? And wouldn’t Captain Zero Kill Count also understand well from Mary’s own history what would happen to him if he were to lay so much as an unwanted finger on her? She killed a practical stranger in all but cold blood with a triumphant hiss of satisfaction!
Badass, by the way. Judging by his responses to Claire throughout the series—see his comments in S1E15 “Wentworth Prison” describing Claire as “no coward” and “a fit match for [her] husband” for example—I suspect Black Jack agreed. He even said explicitly in the same episode that he “cannot give [Claire] a better compliment than that” regarding her bravery and nerve mirroring Jamie’s own. I imagine quite a bit is happening behind those hazel eyes (described by Claire oftentimes as cold but noted distinctly by Roger in Book 8 / Written in My Own Heart’s Blood as being warm) whenever Black Jack looks at Mary.
Especially because Mary herself got Randall’s own abuser offed via Murtagh Fraser keeping a promise of his own in S2E11 “Vengeance Is Mine” by following up Mary’s own dagger-assisted disposal of Danton with an axe swing to Sandringham’s neck. Consider one of the only things Black Jack tells us verbatim about his life offscreen: In S1E06 “The Garrison Commander” a visibly shaken Randall tells Claire about finding Private McGreevey beheaded a couple weeks prior. By contrast, Mary regards her own godfather’s headless corpse with a shrug and says “I think we’d better go” in a matter-of-fact tone. Mary, all of 16 years old at the time, has no combat experience whatsoever and keeps her cool about this absolutely. Quite an evolution even from earlier in the same episode when she questions her ability to assist Claire in communicating with Hugh Munro just outside to help Murtagh and Jamie sneak into the Duke’s house.
Our girl comes through in the end—right before we watch the steel in her spine break through in earnest as she picks up a dagger from a table full of food and ends her rapist’s life after the reveal of this being the same man who attacked her in Paris. And she doesn’t lose her nerve after the immediate danger has passed, either. When we next encounter her at Inverness in S2E12 “The Hail Mary” she’s bullying a pharmacist into giving her more laudanum to ease Alex’s coughing and pain as his illness progresses. Then when Claire recognizes her and says hello, Mary immediately lights into her for conspiring to keep her and Alex apart.
I’ll note that as a person with progressive lung disease myself, I really appreciated Mary’s ire here. However strategic and born of understandable fears that Frank would never get to live, Claire’s invocation earlier in Season 2 of the tired old idea that chronically ill people make undesirable partners—that we can only take from the world and never give—rings both hollow and sour. After all, I’ve been there before. And in many ways I’m still scrambling frantically to escape the shadow of those ideas. To quote my spouse again: You never stop running until long after the demons finally stop chasing you.
I admire Mary Hawkins because she knew when to run—and moreover, because she knew when to stop running and bring the man who chased her in the first place down in sniveling puddle with a knife through his kidney. “It’s messy,” Black Jack said back in S1E15 “Wentworth Prison” of killing people with daggers. But the visceral impact there—exact words and no mistake—never fails to feel any less relatable for me, considering my own experiences.
Here’s the other thing: People came to save Mary Hawkins. When she needed help, people showed up. She killed her own rapist but she had an audience and she had backup. Murtagh demonstrated how seriously he took the promise to avenge Mary if he ever found out who was responsible for the attacks on her and Claire. Black Jack took showing up in Paris to help Alex earlier in Season 2 with similar gravity. In Book 2 / Dragonfly in Amber Claire specifically reflects on how “Jack Randall was a gentleman” with all his promises, and has never given anyone reason to doubt his word despite being awful in many other ways. The fact that Black Jack chose to keep his vows to Mary by caving to the self-loathing fear of being able to love her better by dying and leaving her and Denys his pension than by living and showing her the same fierce devotion he showed Alex doesn’t negate the seriousness of those promises in his mind.
Again exact words there regarding love as action. I’m certain from her own subsequent sharing about Black Jack to their son that Mary would have appreciated both the devotion and the ferocity. And likewise, that Jack himself already appreciated Mary’s own variety of darkness and the specifics of how it manifested after first taking root.
In that spirit I highly recommend visiting the Outlander Wiki page about Mary for additional specifics on her background and character arc. Don’t sleep on the pictures if you do venture over there, especially the ones featuring her looking deep in thought while wearing an elaborate silk gown. That’s not the face of an innocent little lamb with no capacity for brutality of her own. And even prior to her rape, Mary often manipulates people to get what she wants by pouting and playing coy. Which of course tracks—Siri, play “Rich Girl” by Hall and Oates! See also my reblog commentary on a dear mutual’s wonderful art envisioning Black Jack and Mary in a happier timeline.
TL;DR: Mary has a lot of steel in her spine. But it doesn’t save her from additional tribulations. Indeed, those further struggles wind up serving as evidence of Black Jack’s own character and how he treated her himself during their brief marriage prior to his death.
I don’t tend to cry over media. But I absolutely teared up reading Denys Randall’s words about Black Jack in Book 9 / Go Tell the Bees That I Am Gone. Denys is Black Jack’s son who—true to the expanded version in Book 1 / Outlander of the prophecy Claire whispers into Randall’s ear in S1E15 “Wentworth Prison”—never got to meet him because he died in battle. I won’t go into this in detail just here, but that book resoundingly refutes the idea that Black Jack ever treated his family like anything other than gold.
Even in Book 2 / Dragonfly in Amber he speaks with grace and understanding about his older brother Edward, the family heir who is stingy and neglectful and married to a person who clearly and openly hates Black Jack for being queer. In that later book though, we learn how Black Jack actually treated Mary and how carefully he made sure that Denys would always be taken care of financially even if something happened to Mary later on and the income from her widow’s pension was lost. He specifically set aside money for Denys to buy a commission in the Army—or to get an education if he had been considered female, so that he wouldn’t wind up trapped in a loveless marriage for the sake of survival.
The contrast Denys then draws with how Mary’s second husband Robert Isaacs—who was very materially wealthy and very kind to Denys but not a loving spouse—gave me chills. Yeah, Mary Hawkins did get abused by one of her husbands. Just not Black Jack Randall. The clarity with which Book 9 / Go Tell the Bees That I Am Gone shows how much better off Mary would have been socially and emotionally if Black Jack had survived to raise Denys with her wrecked me and still does.
I was and am lucky to have an amazing dad. The lies he and my mother told are wholly understandable stains on the records of two people who have always done their best in an absolutely garbage world that thinks very little of fathers who do not sire their children. And I know some of the members of the sperm donor’s family as well, though not my biological father himself. They’re pretty cool people too. One of my great-cousins on that side said he’d be proud to have been my biological father if he too had chosen to donate to that research study. I did cry then. I’ll never forget opening that letter with my hands shaking while I sat on the stoop of my old house. I can’t impress enough on those of you who are direct genetic descendants of both your parents what that meant to me. I can’t tell you how it feels to look in the mirror and always see a huge question mark. To miss a person you’ve never met, to feel them there like the phantom sensation from an amputated body part.
Denys Randall understands that entirely. And as much as Alex clearly loved his son in life and death alike, we come away from that storyline knowing just how thoroughly Black Jack was a real father to Denys. We also learn how Mary keeps his memory alive and still carries a torch for him as she also continues to mourn Alex. Knowing how much she withdrew into herself haunts me. I keep fixing it in my fics. There will never be a story of mine where Mary isn’t loved and cherished—no matter how much trauma she goes through.
Which also seems to have been Black Jack’s philosophy about both her and Denys. Tragically if quite understandably, he deluded himself into thinking he could love them better in death than in life. The reveal in Book 9 / Go Tell the Bees That I Am Gone on just how tragic a choice this wound up being still crushes me. Because it’s such a hopeless lesson, isn’t it? The idea that cycles of abuse and violence can only be broken by meeting a gruesome end oneself. That humanity has no hope for redemption. That rapists can only ever be rapists, nothing else. Even if they were clearly many other things all along.
This is, incidentally, why as much as I enjoy exploring continuities in which the specific canonical unfolding of events from Wentworth Prison gets averted to at least some degree, I have more active continuities in which this does not happen. I even retconned one of my older stories somewhat because I realized that for the rest of the continuity to play out as I envisioned it, and fully develop the ideas I wanted to develop, straying more than a hair from the exact canonical take in the initial arc didn’t make sense. The results from that deeper thinking are what I just dropped this past Saturday in observance of Alex Randall’s death anniversary. Among my published stories, I presently have three continuities that feature some aversion of the canonical Wentworth sexual assaults and three others that feature no aversion whatsoever.
Someone once asked me if I thought Black Jack and Jamie could ever have a healthy relationship after what happened at the prison in canon. It certainly seems unlikely. But fiction isn’t exclusively about showing healthy relationships. To me, it’s about showing relationships that make sense for the story being told. And in that regard, I do explore the strange intimacy that sometimes grows between trauma bonded people. After all, it’s a tale I’ve come to know well. One I’ve written in my own life. One I’m arguably still writing.
I cannot bring myself to swallow whatever poisonous purity philosophy would lead me to believe that people who have sexually assaulted others in the past cannot have consensual sexual relationships as well. I also can’t ignore the considerable data I’ve amassed on this from direct personal experience.
If people cannot change, what are any of us even doing here? Why not just give up the ghost of life on a burning planet—leave the indignities and hurts of corporeality behind forever? That sort of thinking seems more bleak than anything Black Jack Randall could possibly say or do. Indeed, him winding up looking at his own choices that way in the end broke two hearts irrevocably. And that’s a charitable estimate. Jamie’s own haunting memories, vivid dreams, and enduring obsessions about Black Jack throughout Book 4 / Drums of Autumn and beyond make clear that killing Randall didn’t solve anything, or diminish the formidable pull Jamie feels toward him. Even in show canon, when Claire reveals in S2E03 “Useful Occupations and Deceptions” that Jack is still alive Jamie breathes a sigh of relief and expresses joy at having his will to live restored.
Sure, he frames this around a specific interest in getting revenge against Randall. What’s that saying about digging two graves? There’s no exact source for this in any documented Confucius writings, but the idea certainly holds up. Jamie almost heads to his own grave for the sake of tangling with Randall one last time. For his trouble he winds up nearly dying on the battlefield, then doing the same from a severe infection secondary to his wounds, then goes on the lam for several years and lives in a cave, and then winds up incarcerated under especially deplorable conditions before getting paroled to indentured servitude and winding up coerced into sex again. All while still having relentless horny dreams about Black Jack—which only get hornier after Claire returns to him nearly two decades later. Amazing.
It perfectly correlates that he’s not just a sadistic person, but also holds a powerful position as a member of a colonizing military force.
This came so close to full accuracy. Like frostbitten Edward Little gasping his last with chains in his face levels of close.
Sadistic person? Yes. Powerful position? Kind of. We’ll get to that in a minute. Colonizing military force? Yes. However, is Black Jack himself a colonizer? Only if one discounts what gets revealed in Season 2 and the equivalent portions of Book 2 / Dragonfly in Amber about the Duke of Sandringham having Jacobite sympathies and pulling the strings of Randall’s posting to Fort William.
The Reverend Wakefield and Black Jack’s fifth great-grandson Frank Randall unpack this to some extent in S1E01 “Sassenach” when discussing what Jack was doing in Scotland in the first place and the kind of reputation he built. We don’t get the full goods until close to the end of Season 2 with those scenes in S2E11 “Vengeance Is Mine” where the British Army has Sandringham’s estate surrounded with a massive encampment.
To lay things out quite clearly for those less familiar with Outlander canon: Sandringham was deliberately and strategically trying to incite the Jacobite rebellion. He got Black Jack posted to Fort William specifically because he knew Randall could stir up sentiment against the Crown if given the proper conditions. What’s a better weapon of mass agitation than a terrible guy already maligned by his superiors for being bisexual and kinky and having “unnatural tastes” as Randall himself puts it in S1E15 “Wentworth Prison” while rambling to Claire? If he didn’t give direct orders for Black Jack to lean into his worst impulses when presented with worthy adversaries, the Duke certainly gamed the system as much as possible by marooning Randall in a cold and isolated place where most of the civilians thought he was weird and most of the soldiers thought he was creepy.
Jack doesn’t connect all these dots directly during the scenes at the prison. But in S1E08 “Both Sides Now” during the Fort William sequences—in the broadcast version but even more so in this extended cut—we get Black Jack’s own perspectives on his posting in Scotland and how thoroughly he isn’t invested in the conflict there. All he wants is to go back home and be warm again. Which of course he can’t do, because it would spell serious harm for his younger brother per everything we learn throughout Season 2 and Book 2 / Dragonfly in Amber.
Is Randall powerful in the Army? More so than the soldiers under his command, certainly. But as a Captain—per both what we see in the Brockton sequences of S1E06 “The Garrison Commander” and historical information on British Army ranks—he’s subordinate to many others. Who very much enjoy putting him in his place, at that. So in terms of power relative to other English soldiers, he’s somewhere in the middle of the structure. To those now busily envisioning Office Space type corporate middle management AUs: I salute you! And I’m gonna need you to come in on Saturday.
So what about with respect to other people and contexts? Black Jack definitely isn’t powerful relative to the Duke of Sandringham, per other content here. Indeed, he spends at least the last decade or so of his adult life quite firmly under Sandringham’s thumb. Probably other body parts too—see Randall’s hedging comments in S1E15 “Wentworth Prison” about the Duke liking to talk “especially when he drinks” for example. Book 1 / Outlander and Book 2 / Dragonfly in Amber provide additional context about Black Jack’s positionality relative to others in his world—especially via the Duke telling Claire how much Randall craves punishment.
Finally, let’s talk about Black Jack’s status relative to his self-made enemy Jamie Fraser. By which I mean not at all that Jamie is self-made, because of course he isn’t. As a Laird in charge of his own family estate on which tenant farmers pay taxes, Jamie comes from a more powerful family in the Scottish Highlands than Black Jack’s own back in southern England. We learn more from meeting characters like Mary Hawkins later in canon about how “not all baronetcies are created equal” as I once phrased it. Randall’s own father Sir Denys being a baronet didn’t mean much, as evidenced by Black Jack’s own comments to Claire during S1E06 “The Garrison Commander” and equivalent portions of Book 1 / Outlander about his parents paying for tutors to help their son disguise any hint of a Sussex accent.
Ironically the most power Black Jack could’ve had over Jamie in any structural sense would have come from serving as his commander when the younger man fought in the British Army himself. Which would absolutely make for a splendid fic premise, but never happened in canon. Jamie and Black Jack don’t meet until the former is already back from France and settling in anew on his family’s Lallybroch estate in October of 1740.
We certainly meet other people connected to Jamie’s own family who would qualify as colonizers though. Given I already discuss Lord John Grey elsewhere, here I’ll mention Jamie’s aunt Jocasta Cameron as a prime example. Storylines set at her River Run plantation—yikes—beginning in Season 4 of the TV series and corresponding portions of the novels reveal her as not merely a colonizer but an enslaver. One who has the means—and indeed the implements ready at hand—to liberate her slaves but declines to do so. Even after pressure from people close to her. Double yikes.
I don’t want to set Jocasta up as somehow being more villainous than Black Jack; the two characters show us different aspects of the human capacity for knowing harm. However, I do find it telling that a bisexual person whose worst behavior focuses almost entirely on one guy—and otherwise gets directed at people somehow in his orbit—often gets held up as this shining paragon of evil by viewers outside the queer community, a point Rowan makes herself in the original video essay. What I’m specifically unpacking here is the colonialism angle. The bleak side of humanity shows up in many forms in Outlander with respect to colonialism as well as other forms of violence.
The queer figure is not just a danger to the individual, the men or women who might be their victims, but also a danger to society at large—because their existence contradicts oppose truths about what is natural and right.
This tracks. Randall would say so himself—and indeed he does, in almost those same exact words. “I may have what are called unnatural tastes,” he muses to Claire in S1E15 “Wentworth Prison” while letting her hair down around her shoulders and then giving her a big old sniff and shivering with delight, “but I do have some aesthetic principles.” You know, just in case anyone was still wondering if Black Jack’s interest in women was genuine. Whether in the show or the books, we get plenty of evidence that Randall is in the mood for cunt as often as not, to borrow his own phrasing.
Incidentally, I need to point out how “me myself, I’m not in the mood for cunt today” is probably the most bisexual line ever uttered on television. Today. Mercy.
And so here we see this twisting of a homophobic rhetoric of queer danger to create a monstrous rapist colonial figurehead.
First, a clarification: The relevant phobia here is biphobia rather than homophobia. Rowan’s video essay covers this overall topic and the distinction between the two phenomena with substantial detail and insight. What doesn’t come through clearly in the video is how gay people are treated with much more respect in the story world of Outlander than their bisexual peers. Nowhere do we see this more clearly than with Lord John Grey, another queer Redcoat whose path intertwines with Jamie’s in numerous ways over the years.
After first encountering Grey as a scared teenager whose life Jamie spares in S2E09 “Je Suis Prest” we encounter him anew years later starting in S3E03 “All Debts Paid” as the incoming warden of Ardsmuir Prison where Jamie is incarcerated. Swiftly mortified by conditions at the prison, Lord John enlists Jamie’s help in working with prisoners and eventually forges a tenuous friendship with him. Much chess is also played. However, a wedge also gets driven between the two men when Lord John places his hand over Jamie’s one evening during a chess game, unaware of his history with Black Jack or how it would make him react to any expression of affection by another man.
But over time, Lord John secures Jamie’s parole to the Helwater estate where each of them respectively wind up entangled with one of the Dunsany sisters. The younger Geneva, a feisty and cantankerous person who develops quite a fondness for Jamie, coerces the Highlander into sleeping with her when she reveals that she knows his true identity and could get him in a lot of trouble. To get Jamie employment and ensure that he could stay out of prison, Lord John had to pass him off as a run-of-the-mill parolee instead of the fabled “Red Jamie” who helped to lead the Jacobite rebellion. Rather ironic considering Jamie killed one of the actual leaders of the rebellion and could likely have gotten significantly better treatment from the Crown based on that—but that’s beyond the scope of this analysis.
Throughout his storylines, whether serving as warden at Ardsmuir or Governor of Jamaica or any of the other roles he occupies over the years, Lord John is shown to be empathetic and kind. Not without fault certainly. Amongst other things there’s an intriguing storyline later in canon involving him and Claire that serves as a reminder of how sexuality is often not black and white. But he does get set up consistently as a foil to Randall, perhaps most effectively in his choice to marry Geneva’s older sister Isobel and care for the child she conceived with Jamie prior to dying while giving birth. Lord John presents a different take on fatherhood, choosing to give of his presence to William Ransom rather than feeling he can love him best in absentia.
The books offer some fascinating scenes in which Lord John’s son William and Black Jack’s son Denys encounter each other while both serving in the British Army in the American Colonies. That’s how we learn some of the information referenced elsewhere about what Mary Hawkins has passed on to her son about his father, and how she feels herself. I resonated a lot with both men’s sense of having a hole inside them. At this point William has lost two mothers and two fathers—Jamie having had quite a hand in the boy’s upbringing until age six. By 1778 when he encounters Denys again, he has learned the truth about who sired him.
I could write a whole other essay about that considering how relatable the entire storyline surrounding William’s parentage is. Folks who read my work likely know by this point that I got into Outlander because the interconnected storylines surrounding the Randall and Fraser families resonate with my own trauma in a way nothing else ever has. For purposes of this essay though, I’ll point out that even after lying to his kid for many years and dealing him a psychic wound that will never heal as a result, Lord John gets hailed as a good dad and a good person.
John Grey absolutely isn’t a rapist. In fact, in S3E04 “Of Lost Things” he reacts with horror at the idea of Jamie giving him sexual favors in exchange for raising his son. It turns out that Grey is already marrying Geneva’s older sister Isobel—another fascinating subject for deeper analysis that I’m planning to incorporate into my “Dispatches from Fort Laggan” continuity.
Brief sidebar apropos of general queer representation themes: The relationship between Lord John and Isobel offers an undersung illustration in Outlander canon of the diverse dynamics in queer marriages. I think there’s ample ground for reading the union between Lord John and Isobel as either a “lavender marriage” between a homosexual and homoromantic man with a heteroromantic or biromantic woman who’s asexual or a purely romantic marriage that doesn’t involve any sexual activity because one person isn’t interested at all and the other person is only interested with members of their own sex.
What’s more relevant here is how Lord John and Isobel clearly share a deep affection for one another that engages their shared love for other family members—quite similar to the dynamic between Black Jack and Mary. In serving as a foil for Black Jack on some fronts, Grey serves as a mirror in others. Unsurprising then how by the time he encounters William again, Denys Randall has dropped “Isaacs” from his surname entirely after the death of his stepfather Robert.
On the colonialism front, it would be difficult to frame Black Jack as being somehow the worse offender. Although not a Jacobite himself because he doesn’t care about the outcome of the English-Scottish conflict one way or another, he serves as an agent for the Jacobite cause de facto by agitating unrest at Sandringham’s behest. Ironically an example of punch-clock villainy in that regard. Although I wouldn’t ordinarily associate that trope with Black Jack for his zeal in antagonistic behavior towards Jamie and anyone in his orbit, it certainly seems to reflect how he approaches his career. Randall has no less antipathy for his fellow English people than he does for Scottish Highlanders, and indeed awkwardly hopes for acceptance by the local people while new at Fort William per his exchange with Roger in Book 8 / Written in My Own Heart’s Blood.
Meanwhile, Lord John’s storyline sees him become Governor of Jamaica. Governor of Jamaica. If that isn’t the epitome of white settler colonialism I don’t know what is.
Here’s a monster against which are two culturally opposed heroes; English Claire and Scottish Jamie can feel equally threatened.
I think I covered most of the relevant contrasts here in my musings on the sexual assaults against Jamie and Claire during Season 1. Here I’ll add that indeed a major plot point for Claire is how she often does not feel threatened by Randall—and how readily he comes to consider her an ally deserving of his deepest respect. This seems especially interesting in the context of Claire’s own ambiguous sexuality, which I touch on directly in some brief discussion of Geillis Duncan. And from their encounter in the gardens at Versailles from S2E05 onward, Claire by her own admission doesn’t consider Black Jack any sort of threat. She wants Jamie to leave him alone and let him help his brother out without the two of them getting into trouble for having horny fights. Dueling was illegal in Paris at the time, and indeed Jamie gets arrested for fighting Black Jack at the Bois de Boulogne a couple episodes later.
Prior to that though, Claire frantically ruins Jamie’s original plans for dueling Black Jack by getting Randall locked in the Bastille overnight on suspicion of raping Mary Hawkins. The irony to end all ironies, surely! Randall himself doesn’t even seem that aggravated about it given Claire did this in an effort to spare his life. He does however feel aggravated about Jamie apparently deciding he’s not worth the trouble to fight, not knowing all the history surrounding Frank Randall or why exactly Claire seems certain that he’ll die in April of 1746.
Both Black Jack and Claire wind up badly injured following the duel—her with a complicated stillbirth that leaves the placenta inside her body and nearly causes death from sepsis, and him from a significant stab wound to the groin. In show canon per S2E07 “Faith” this appears to be mainly a soft tissue injury to the pubic mound and possibly a cut to the side of the base of the penis; in the novel version it’s more extensive and involves some maiming of the penis and one testicle. I mention this now because in Book 2 / Dragonfly in Amber Claire reflects specifically on Randall being even less of a threat because of his injuries. He’s also very ill in the novel version, likely from a recent bout of cholera, whereas in the show his physical impairments are caused by the cattle stampede from the rescue sequence at the beginning of S1E16 “To Ransom a Man’s Soul”.
So it seems unsurprising that when Black Jack reconnects with Claire at Inverness (Edinburgh in book canon) and begs her to use her skills in healing to save his brother Alex’s life, the two characters find themselves on remarkably even footing. Claire lampshades this herself in repeating Randall’s “I am not the man I once was” line from S1E06 “The Garrison Commander” back to him. Randall also acknowledges this amid strong praise for her medical acumen. He has long since gotten direct perspective on those competencies himself considering the aid she rendered to a badly injured British soldier at Brockton in the same episode, along with her clear success in rehabilitating Jamie’s hand following the extensive injuries Black Jack inflicted to it in S1E15 “Wentworth Prison”.
In both the show and book versions of canon, Claire shows Randall as much compassion as she can, and also expresses respect in her narrations for how he has shouldered the financial and instrumental costs of caring for his brother largely alone. When she urges him to wed Mary in their interactions at the tavern in S2E12 “The Hail Mary” she echoes many of Alex’s own sentiments about Black Jack’s capacity for tenderness and how seriously he takes caring for his family.
Given she already knows how Randall will die, and continues caring for him as best she can even after it gets revealed that Frank’s family line descends genetically from Alex rather than Black Jack himself, her “I’ll help you bleed him myself” comment to Jamie in S2E05 “Untimely Resurrection” seems more for his benefit than her own. Indeed, in book canon Claire feels threatened by Jamie’s lingering obsession with Randall and his repeated rambling about the strange erotic dreams he has about Black Jack. She wants him to have closure on that part of his life, thinking that Randall dying will put a stop to that fixation. Unfortunately for Claire it’s not that simple.
Even Jamie himself doesn’t consider Randall much of a threat in the end. In the book version of canon, he even attends Black Jack’s wedding and serves as a witness for him, whereas Murtagh does this on the show. Book 2 / Dragonfly in Amber details how Jamie escorts a drunk and crying Black Jack back to his own quarters, holding him up because he can’t walk on his own. We never find out what exactly happened between the two of them in that room, though goodness knows a couple of enterprising fan authors have done heroic work in envisioning potentialities.
Show canon does deliver entirely on the erotic tenor of the final encounter between the two men just as Book 3 / Voyager does, with much of S3E01 “The Battle Joined” getting devoted to Black Jack and Jamie grappling with each other while moaning against each other’s ears and looking as if they’re about to have orgasms. Makes sense considering the showrunners reportedly instructed Tobias Menzies and Sam Heughan to go for a combination of the final battle sequence from The Patriot and the sex scene from Cold Mountain in their choreography. They definitely nailed it on the filming. Very much the same energy in the books from all of Jamie’s flashbacks to those moments and the time he spent lying under Black Jack’s body.
An irony that seems worth mentioning itself for how Randall’s last act was to protect Jamie from getting finished off himself during the British Army’s death sweeps of Culloden Moore. In light of this and all the other history between the two of them, it seems less surprising that Jamie left his wedding present—which Claire had returned to him for safekeeping before going back through the stones to her own time—of a dragonfly preserved in amber on the battlefield with Black Jack’s body.
And it’s by standing up to his reign of terror that the two come together, eventually falling in love.
Reign of terror? Not so much, for reasons I’ve already gone into elsewhere. What precisely is Randall “reigning” over in the first place? He’s an exiled soldier who got given a remote fort on a bunch of barren rocks surrounded by water in a freezing cold place that he hates. He has no power over anyone except his own soldiers.
In terms of more overt antagonism, Black Jack focuses the vast majority of his awful behavior on someone who even while chained to a dungeon floor could still kill him with his bare hands. Jamie does kill Black Jack’s much larger and stronger bodyguard Marley in S1E15 “Wentworth Prison” while restrained thusly. If Randall is keeping the Highlands in any kind of iron grip, it’s so weak that he can’t even keep his own bodyguard alive with a chained-up prisoner. Who isn’t even there by his own doing, mind—Jamie gets picked up by a random Redcoat patrol after getting coerced in S1E13 “The Watch” into joining the Watch with Taran MacQuarrie, a suspected Jacobite accused of treason. More details on this get revealed in S1E14 “The Search” as Claire, Jenny, and Murtagh all strive to locate Jamie.
Much of that falls beyond the scope of this analysis. Directly within that scope though is how whether or not anyone likes it, Jamie survives his incarceration at Wentworth Prison because Black Jack raced down there just in time to get him brought down from the gallows. Given canonical knowledge of how Randall does nothing without sincerity—however twisted that sincerity may be—this paints a complicated picture of his impact.
Indeed, one of the things that makes the dynamic between Black Jack and Jamie so interesting and satisfying is how in many ways they’re equals. I covered that extensively in my Ask response about foil dynamics in Outlander canon, so I won’t rehash it in this analysis. But TL;DR: Black Jack assaulting Jamie, and Jamie assaulting Black Jack in kind, was never an exercise in one person punching up and the other punching down. Rather, it is very much an exercise in two people punching sideways. Which a dear mutual illustrated masterfully in their “Killer” sketch previously shared here on Tumblr.
Claire and Jamie do fall in love though. That process is fairly telling on its own—as Rowan points out herself with the very next insight in the video essay. But a few additional details can further unpack sexuality in the context of that relationship, especially in the context of both characters’ interactions with Black Jack.
By opposing Randall’s villainy, they are essentially fighting to maintain the political and social beliefs of the 1740s Scotland, while also solidifying their own relationship and sexual identities—which are heterosexual and monogamous even across time and space.
Okay, folks. I’m flicking on my megaphone here to remind everyone reading this that Jamie is bisexual and that the omission of this key canonical detail could inadvertently reproduce some of the stigmas against bisexuality the video aims to dismantle. I absolutely do not think Rowan did this intentionally. It may stem from limited engagement with the source material in general. I wouldn’t expect a video essay covering a wide scope of media to go into 16K+ words of detail about a single character! That’s what I’m here for. In that spirit, I highly recommend folks interested in going deeper with Outlander canon revisit Jamie’s own narration of his experiences in S1E16 “To Ransom a Man’s Soul” and the many things he says and does in later episodes regarding Black Jack. The books go into even more detail about how much Jamie still lusts after Randall even after the assault at Wentworth, I’ll note.
The more important point here though is how erasure of Jamie’s bisexuality via inattention to his own words can inadvertently reflect Claire’s own behavior at the abbey in that episode: refusing to listen to Jamie unless he tells her what she wants to hear, and specifically shutting him down every time he tries to make her understand that Black Jack made him face things he already wanted beneath the surface.
Even regarding Claire, nuances abound that seem especially important to explore given the above. Specifically concerning the ambiguity of Claire’s own sexuality—how although she never narrates herself clearly in bisexual context, she certainly gets into some telling situations with Geillis Duncan. Claire may not be explicitly bisexual per her own words as Jamie reveals himself to be from S1E16 “To Ransom a Man’s Soul” and equivalent portions of Book 1 / Outlander onward. But we can certainly spot multiple bi-coded elements of her character before even getting to the whole Malva Christie business in Season 6 and Book 6 / A Breath of Snow and Ashes.
Geillis herself is another bi-coded villain who could put Randall to shame for the extent of her agenda and advance planning. Indeed, Geillis’s deeper intent and systemic aims qualify her much more classically for the villain designation than Randall himself, who behaves much more opportunistically. Let’s not forget that he leaves Jamie entirely alone for three years until the Highlander turns up in his office window at Fort William with an empty pistol! Likewise, Black Jack’s own service as an instigator of Jacobite rebellion only comes in exchange for the Duke of Sandringham protecting his beloved brother Alex—including not raping him, which gets further lampshaded by Jamie’s comments about how the Duke has treated him over the years.
It also seems worth noting how Claire offers a good example of how people who might be capable of polyamory through their capacity to love two different men at once don’t necessarily want polyamory. That’s why I abandoned a storyline in one of my early fic series development efforts—my first actually, which never saw the light of day in its original form because it morphed into “Dispatches from Fort Laggan” with a much greater depth of attention to the relationship between Black Jack and Jamie in parallel to his evolving relationship with Mary. Which winds up catapulting Jamie headlong into a raging attraction to Geneva Dunsany, someone much better equipped to meet his needs as a bisexual and kinky guy who’s perfectly capable of sustaining unspeakable horniness about an absurdly complicated man while also being a loving and devoted life partner to a woman.
But by making Lestat the only bi vampire in the show, his moral depravity can be seen as in some way linked to an assumed sexual depravity too—specifically of voracious appetite that separates his bisexual nature from either straight or gay counterparts.
This would be pretty accurate for Randall too. Kind of a missed opportunity to get things close to spot-on. With Randall though there’s even some Zig-Zagging of this aspect, which is part of what makes his character great. Although Black Jack has a voracious sexual appetite and is pretty much always DTF, he is also very much a Regular Guy with Regular Dick Function. He can’t just constantly get it up over and over. Between his alcoholism and his constant pursuit of sexual pleasure, he sometimes can’t get hard at all. He even has concerns about this with Jamie at Wentworth, gloating in delight when he does get an erection. The “can you feel that” scene in S1E15 “Wentworth Prison” wherein Black Jack pulls Jamie’s hand against his crotch and expresses jubilation at having a boner is one of the funniest moments in the entire series to those of us who enjoy Randall’s character.
This is perhaps a good time to note that one thing queer villain representation often does beautifully is imbuing characters with hilarious and often bizarre senses of humor. When I’ve seen other writers frame Randall as humorless or “harrowingly joyless” I’ve wondered again if we watched the same show. The Brockton sequences from S1E06 “The Garrison Commander” alone ought to debunk this, from Randall’s passive aggressive dust party right down to his impish little wink at Claire while he dumps out the prized claret the senior officers were drinking before getting called out on some kind of wild goose chase.
Then there’s also his sardonic monologuing in S1E15 “Wentworth Prison” about possible methods of killing Jamie in the morning, which is entirely tongue-in-cheek and intended solely to make Jamie get annoyed enough to tussle with him. I also consider the weirdly earnest threesome proposition from S1E09 “The Reckoning” when Jamie appears in the window of his office holding an empty pistol. It’s quite clear here that regardless of whether Jamie takes him up on it or just gets irritated enough to fight him fisticuffs and thus give him some nice opportunities to rub up against him, Randall is delighting in the offering.
Finally, we can’t forget his overjoyed little smiles whenever he sees either Jamie or Mary Hawkins. I covered much of this previously via in-depth discussion of Mary’s storylines. So here I’ll note that for all his own efforts to convince Claire that he’d be terrible for Mary, she doesn’t believe Black Jack in the slightest—because she’s already seen how he behaves with her, and likewise both seen and heard directly from Alex how kind and tender Randall has always been with his younger brother. Whom he basically raised, which is a whole other yarn.
Here’s the thing though: One doesn’t need to watch Outlander in any great depth to see that for Black Jack, much of the point of sadism lies in the aftercare. I haven’t belabored that point here overmuch because I don’t want to suggest that caretaking afterwards in any way negates harm done beforehand. However, Randall does consistently show genuine pleasure in taking care of another person. We see this in some ways with Jamie at Wentworth Prison in S1E16 “To Ransom a Man’s Soul” but then get a whole different context on it in Season 2, especially with S2E12 “The Hail Mary” when the curtain finally pulls back fully on Black Jack’s family life. The only moments where he seems to relax at all is when he’s helping someone feel better after a horrible privation—either by his own hand or from the ravages of illness. And in those moments, we see plenty of vulnerability. Which brings us to…
Unlike Randall, there is a vulnerability in and understanding of Lestat’s backstory that contextualizes his behavior.
I’m not so sure about this. Even midway through Season 1 starting with S1E06 “The Garrison Commander” this understanding of Randall’s character begins to fray at the edges. More details on that below. Likewise, we learn a good bit in Season 2 about Randall’s family and what has been going on behind the curtain of his own life as a result. But even beforehand, the scene in S1E15 “Wentworth Prison” where Black Jack forlornly talks to Jamie in the dungeon cell while seated and looking at him with sad eyes says quite a bit. He finds Jamie’s rejection in the face of a clear attraction painful; this is no less important for his own vicious response to that pain after Jamie taunts him about having no self-control. Subsequently we see in S1E16 “To Ransom a Man’s Soul” the lengths Black Jack will go to for the sake of affectionate treatment.
Not all love is constructive or good, but Randall leaves little doubt in his own behavior that his actions are very much in pursuit of love. This gets lampshaded a final time in Book 6 / A Breath of Snow and Ashes with the reveal of what Randall mouthed to Jamie in that one sequence of S3E01 “The Battle Joined” just before collapsing on top of him and dying from his wounds. During the abbey sequences in Book 1 / Outlander Jamie also recalls Black Jack lying beside him on the dungeon floor, crying profusely and begging him to speak words of love. Adding in the murky context missing from the show—about Jack having some sort of sexual history with either the deceased prisoner Alex MacGregor and/or his own younger brother Alex Randall—paints a telling portrait of a man desperate for affection and connection.
Though he doesn’t excuse it, we see his traumatic past, and feel how much he yearns for family and love.
Very true about Lestat, certainly. But I’d say this could also have easily been written about Black Jack.
In other portions of this essay I cover Randall’s behavior at Wentworth Prison in Season 1 and the Inverness storyline at the end of Season 2. To rehash here in brief, the only things that matter to Black Jack are (A) someone loving him back in a way he understands and (B) doing whatever he can to take care of his family. Black Jack doesn’t say as much directly to this effect, but he certainly shows us through action that yearning for family and love motivate a lot of his behavior. The fact that his pursuit of these things often happens through twisted means scarcely means he doesn’t want them. Quite the opposite.
As for the traumatic past, Black Jack and other characters alike (especially the Duke of Sandringham) drop hints throughout the Season 1 and Season 2 storylines—and even more so in corresponding portions of Book 1 / Outlander and Book 2 / Dragonfly in Amber—that Randall grew up in an abusive home and imprinted on that. It’s also clear from his interactions with Alex that he’s been protecting his brother from a lot over the years. The Duke himself certainly, but also other things. And in the corresponding sequences from the novels Jack goes into some detail about how little support he and Alex have ever gotten from their family back in Sussex, including from their older brother Edward even now that Alex is dying.
Then of course Black Jack himself talks aloud to Claire at Brockton about his traumatic present and how the armed conflict in Scotland has further warped his mind. He’s clearly shaken about finding one of his own men brutally beheaded and speaks in more general terms about being “not the man [he] once was” as a result of his military service. No surprise either that he looks like a fish out of water the one time we see him in non-military dress during S2E12 “The Hail Mary”. Black Jack may not like what serving in the Army has done to further damage his psyche, but at this point it’s all he understands and the only place he feels he belongs at all. On that front…
It’s not difficult to see the parallels between his existence as a vampire, and the isolation and threat many members of the queer community feel.
Here I should also include my response to the aforementioned excellent meta on homosociality in The Patriot canon. As noted previously I’m hoping to release a similarly focused reflection of my own in time addressing Outlander canon directly. For now I’ll applaud Rowan’s general attention in the video to how bisexual people often become isolated within the queer community as well as in the world at large.
Double marginalization is a lonely experience in the utmost—and one that can breed tremendous resentment. That anger has to go somewhere more often than not. Even without the added burden of silent rage from sexual violence and the constant “insult to injury” experience of having our own trauma collide with that of others walking a similar path, things are tough. And the data on experiences of rape and abuse in the bisexual community remain incredibly damning.
So again, I think Lestat and Black Jack would find plenty of common ground in one another’s histories. Although Lestat himself doesn’t really meet the criteria for sexual sadism, he certainly enjoys bloodplay and the general aesthetic of violence as part of intimate congress. This isn’t surprising in the slightest considering how the capacity to enjoy such pleasures often grows and sharpens in response to abuse of any form, including rape and domestic violence.
My own life has certainly been an exercise in this. If that seems confusing, consider: For people who are well accustomed to people bleeding on us when we didn’t cut them, it can feel immensely satisfying to have someone bleed on us because we did cut them.
Whereas the initial seasons of Outlander have no sympathetic or heroic queer heroes at all, Interview with the Vampire does give us another lead who fulfills this protagonist role in Louis.
I’m glad this was the last content in the video that mentioned Outlander directly. I think there’s enough context from the rest of this segment for viewers to understand the intended contrast here. Prior to Season 3 we don’t encounter characters in Outlander who are fully immersed in their queerness other than Black Jack, whereas Interview with the Vampire centers characters who show more of that immersion from the beginning on both the protagonist and antagonist sides.
Given the centrality of Jamie’s character arc to Randall’s though, the omission of his own bisexuality from this video essay seems quite the lost opportunity. To reiterate, in both versions of canon beginning with S1E16 “To Ransom a Man’s Soul” and equivalent sequences from the novels we get verbatim documentation directly from the source that Jamie is bisexual himself. This is in addition to his earlier comments about considering the prospect of sleeping with Randall at Fort William and only turning him down because he thought his dad would be disappointed in him. Not for having same-sex relations, but rather for capitulating to another man. That’s a lot to unpack, folks.
Indeed, Jamie’s storylines throughout the TV and book series alike are often demonstrations of how the ideation of heterosexuality and the pressure to live a heterosexual life do deep harm to bisexual men. This gets lampshaded further by the anvilicious contrasts constantly drawn between Black Jack and the decidedly gay Lord John Grey. The latter is set up as a perennial foil for Randall, getting into similar scenarios with Jamie—starting with his time as warden at Ardsmuir Prison in Season 3 and Book 3 / Voyager—but taking them in entirely different directions. Which I appreciate in essentials for the spinning of a superb narrative about complex post-traumatic stress. More so for living with that particular set of issues myself.
Once again for the good of the Republic: If you don’t heal what hurt you, you’ll bleed on people who didn’t cut you.
Apropos of this, I want to express particular appreciation for the video’s exploration of the “puriteens” phenomenon—and incorporate a caution for those slightly elder members of fandom. It can be very easy for people to fall into the trap of assuming that bisexual people are always hypersexual. And even easier to assume that those bisexual folk who truly are hypersexual are automatically threats because of this. More so if said individuals also happen to be kinky, and especially if they are specifically sadistic.
I mention this now because as queer people marginalized from within the queer community as well as without, bisexual and asexual folk stand on common ground. I have seen the transformative power in allyship between bi and ace people in fighting our shared oppressions. Sadly I have also seen many successful efforts to tear that natural solidarity asunder by making ace people fear us as predators. And the first against the wall, same as always, are the hypersexual and kinky among us.
So I’m happy beyond words to see openly ace creators like Rowan Ellis standing up for bisexual people. Making sure that our struggles and our humanity alike are always seen and valued. In kind, I strongly encourage everyone reading this to take this analysis of Rowan’s commentary on Outlander in the spirit in which I intend it. To say that I strongly support both the general content and overall standpoint of this video would understate the case.
Indeed, I offer this detailed analysis now because I know the depth of Rowan’s commitment to diverse queer representation. I want to build on the dialogue sparked by the video and to bring that depth on Randall’s character to the impressive breadth of focus in Rowan’s overview of queer villains. The fact that doing so amplifies the labor, effort, and insight of an asexual creator made me even more inclined to give this my full effort. I hope Rowan will keep putting her voice and perspective into the world for many years to come.
For now, I’m grateful for this opportunity to once again bring Black Jack Randall to my little corner of the Internet in dizzying detail. And moreover, to do so in amplifying the work of a fellow creator explicitly naming the harm done by respectability politics surrounding queerness.
Randall may not be the bisexual representation everyone wants, but he’s absolutely the bisexual representation the world needs. Because if he isn’t a resounding comeback to respectability politics that attempt to deny “problematic” bisexual people their basic human rights—and indeed an effective illustration of the deep harms those kinds of approaches to queerness not only do directly but also reproduce in cyclical patterns—I don’t know what character possibly could be.
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my-castles-crumbling · 2 months
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Hi I just have a question and I mean to ask it as respectfully as possible
When did people start head cannoning Regulus as trans? I just dont understand how people came to that conclusion?
I’m also just very uneducated on the trans community and I know that and just don’t really know where to get reliable information about the whole community and the people in it.
Idk in my opinion I just almost feel like people made Regulus trans to meet a diversity quota. I also feel like it kind of takes away from the fact that James could be genuinely attracted to biological males? Like maybe people are still so attached to Jily that they can’t truly let go of it even in his other ship?
Sorry I just really would like to see the point of view from someone who is part of the trans community (correct me if I’m wrong on that please) and also enjoys and writes trans Regulus. It really just makes me sad that I don’t read so many fanfics that I’m sure are absolutely beautiful just because I’m a little put off by Regulus (or even Remus) being trans.
Anyway I’d love to hear the reasoning you have and I’m so sorry if any of this came off as offensive or rude🫶
Okay, so to answer your first question, the first fic in ao3 tagged with trans! Regulus Black is dated in March 2016, so 8 years ago. (I see a Jegulus fic tagged in 2005, for comparison).
As far as people coming to the conclusion of reg being trans, I think it's just people seeing themselves in the character, or enjoying the headcanon. It's not like...deciding it IS canon. If that makes sense?
For information on the community, I'm not sure what you mean. Like information in being trans? If you have questions on that, I'm more than willing to answer them! I can point you to reliable websites or try to give you my own experience.
I don't think it's 'meeting a diversity quota.' I think it's that Harry Potter is genuinely super NOT diverse. Canonically, most characters are straight, cis, and white. And fanfiction writers like to write what they want and what they relate to. Many fanfic writers know trans people/are trans, so it's natural to include trans people in their works. It's not meeting a quota, it's just emulating their lives.
And as far as James's attraction..sure, he can be attracted to people with any genitals. But I think you're missing the point that trans Regulus IS a boy. Your body doesn't equal your gender. So when James is attracted to him, he is attracted to a boy. He is, therefore, gay (or at least queer) by being attracted to Regulus. Very gently, seeing trans Regulus as a substitution for Lily because they might have similar bodies is a bit transphobic. Though body parts can be important to some people, putting Regulus and Lily on the same plane is a bit off. (Also, many people headcanon James as pansexual, meaning he can be attracted to any gender, so he doesn't care what gender people are.) You ARE right in saying that some people probably do think this way though. But it's not okay.
As far as not liking the headcanon of trans!Regulus or trans!Remus or whoever...I don't think that's a bad thing IN THEORY. For example, I don't see Harry as trans. There are some Drarry fics which have trans!Harry and I don't read them, because that's not my headcanon. Fanfics are for your enjoyment, and you don't have to force yourself to read them if they don't share your specific headcanons. I would just think about WHY you're not reading these fics. If you just see these characters as cis, then that's fine! But if it's because you might need more education of transness and what it means to be trans, then maybe take the time to educate yourself and go from there, you know?
I hope that helps!
(Also if anyone wants to chime in in the comments, you're welcome to, but please be respectful, this was a genuine question)
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kaylinalexanderbooks · 6 months
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WIP Questionnaire
Thanks @buffythevampirelover for the tag! This game looks fun!
Rules: answer as few or as many as you'd like!
1. What was the first part of your wip that you created?
TSP: Lexi was! TSP started out as a school project, and we had to create a character sheet for our first person narrator! That was "Alexia" who is now just "Lexi" (but her full name is still Alexia).
SOTL: The concept! "School for fairy tale characters" was basically it. I got discouraged a bit when I found out this concept already existed, but that didn't mean I couldn't do my own take!
2. If your story was a TV show, what would the theme song/intro be?
My favorite types of intros for TV shows are original theme songs or very catchy instrumental music. 30-60 seconds is a good length. I'd hope that for TSP and SOTL. Hope this isn't a cop-out.
3. Who are your favourite characters you've made? Why?
TSP: My favorite characters to write for are Lexi, Gwen, Akash, Robbie, and Carmen. Lexi because the arc I gave her is an exaggerated version of something that speaks a lot to me. Gwen because I wasn't expecting her to be as interesting as she ended up being planned to be. Robbie and Akash because of how funny and sweet their dynamic is. Yes, I love them separately, but they're a package set. Carmen because she's just so damn interesting I love studying her under a microscope.
SOTL: I am barely into writing it, but it's Jack at the moment. Shocker, he has three chapters while Tierney and Úrsula have one each! But the reason is that he is average at everything, but he doesn't let that get him down! He's funny and relatable and a dork.
4. What other pieces of media do you think would share a fan base for your story?
TSP: Hm, good question. The only thing coming to mind right now is Young Justice (the cartoon). Starts out with this fun group of kids, becomes extremely dark. Ensemble cast. Sneaking around. Superpowers. Fight scenes. Drama.
SOTL: Insert fairy tale retelling here.
5. What has been your biggest struggle with your wip?
TSP: Juggling everything. The world building, I guess. Making all the characters distinct was something I struggled at for a while, but I'm getting much better at it. Trying to figure out how the world works is challenging, but I am having fun. But juggling all the moving parts to make it cohesive is a challenge.
SOTL: What is plot?!! Also battling my ambition to do every fairy tale ever. I'm gonna have to make a lot of background characters that will get their own side stories separate from the main series to get all that I want. I probably will do that.
6. Are there any animals in your story? Talk about them!
TSP: Yep! Alium has a lot of fantasy creatures, animal hybrids, and fun things I just made up. Custos the dragon is the only truly prominent one right now. He's a blue fire dragon and is adorable. I also have kitsunes. Animal hybrids include unibison, ferretsnakes, cowyotes, beaverducks. Things I made up include the elemental foxes and blue hedgehogs.
SOTL: Hofiwi is an anthropomorphic bear! She was cursed to be anthropomorphic, this is not a normal thing in this world. I love her and she's just planned at the moment. Can't wait to do more.
7. How do your characters get around? (ex: trains, horses, cars, dragons, etc.)
TSP: Hovercrafts, dragons, teleporting, trains, and some other power-based travel
SOTL: I'm still figuring this out no one has gone anywhere yet. Dragons or carriages would be cool. Maybe I can mix them with something modern to fit the setting.
8. What part of your wip are you working on rn?
TSP: World building! Specifically the power database since that will be the backbone for everything.
SOTL: Reading fairy tales... I need to do that more
9. What aspects (tropes, maybe?) of your wip do you think will draw people in?
TSP: Powers, diverse cast, queer/disability rep
SOTL: same as TSP but fairy tales!
10. What are your hopes for your wip?
If I see one (1) fanart between either my life will be complete.
This was fun!
Softly tagging @mk-writes-stuff @jezifster @blind-the-winds @little-peril-stories @sleepywriter00 @mysticstarlightduck @sarahlizziewrites @writernopal @gottestod-writes + anyone who wants to join!
TSP intro
TSP tag list (ask to be +/-): @thepeculiarbird @illarian-rambling @televisionjester @finchwrites - giving a slightly harder nudge than usual cause I really want to see what y'all have to say! Still optional obviously
Blanks below the cut!
1. What was the first part of your wip that you created?
2. If your story was a TV show, what would the theme song/intro be?
3. Who are your favourite characters you've made? Why?
4. What other pieces of media do you think would share a fan base for your story?
5. What has been your biggest struggle with your wip?
6. Are there any animals in your story? Talk about them!
7. How do your characters get around? (ex: trains, horses, cars, dragons, etc.)
8. What part of your wip are you working on rn?
9. What aspects (tropes, maybe?) of your wip do you think will draw people in?
10. What are your hopes for your wip?
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mattdillon · 27 days
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alright second viewing of the musical post mortem, in bullet points
it truly wants to have it's cake and eat it too. it wants to be praised for racial diversity yet brings up race in all the wrong ways and contexts and has zero optics involved.
the treatment of greaser identity is horribly handled. ponyboy always knew he was a greaser, acted like it, participated in it. what was shaky is that he didn't understand how to behave regarding a future of being a greaser and didn't like how society treated him for being a greaser. the musical acts like he's never been into it at all, going so far as to act like he's never been in a rumble which is entirely stupid when he states he and johnny were involved in rumbles together, often tag teaming
johnny is a character i don't love because his fanbase is truly annoying and even i was extremely appalled, again, at the lack of agency he is given here. dallas acts surprised he's sleeping outside — fucking why? they all know he sleeps out there! they all know his situation! — and then is the one to arm him with the switchblade. this totally robs johnny's choices to defend himself on his own and undermines his conviction to hurt the next soc who harms him.
soda is not a fully fledged character at all. his empathetic traits are completely removed and as a friend pointed out, he gets laughs like two bit should be getting laughs. he is not the empathetic, sensitive brother in either canon.
darry is laughably bad while also being deeply cruel to siblings he says he loves. allegedly. darry is also not my favorite (side bar: the paul/darry fanbase springing out of this would have you believe paul is a major character. he's not. he's the same fucking loser who leaves his junior year of college to go fight someone around midterms! loser behavior all around!) character and i feel like they wrote him straight from the tv show. he acts like he's been at this grind for years, not a few months, he's an outright tyrant to ponyboy and soda, and nothing about the performance or writing makes you feel anything for him except contempt. there's not an ounce of warmth in his performance or "brotherhood" people keep extolling.
the musical excises gone with the wind so they don't have to deal with it and it makes it poorer. stay gold, gallant that shit doesn't make sense unless you have both gwtw and the robert frost poem. clumsily inserting cinema they skimmed from wikipedia doesn't work.
there's too much #notallsocs with cherry's character. her one good point is that she does break up with bob (why does he looks and sound like someone who knows what bitcoin is with a bbl?) and other than that she acts as both a white savior and Sacred White Womanhood to Be Protected.
tuned out the songs this time. they're bland, badly staged, absolutely terrible in the choice of genre and are utterly forgettable.
i have a third round soon so. more overall thoughts later.
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fandomshatefatpeople · 6 months
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is it fair of me to say i really hate how many people claim they love fat characters and want more diverse body types, and you go to their blog, and they have nothing but thin, or *"thicc" character art reblogged/created/talked about?
especially because, as an artist, I'll draw plenty of diverse ocs, post them, but the fat characters don't get touched whatsoever, yet my thinner characters get notes. like, this isn't a gripe about not getttng recognition (i don't generally do fandom so I don't expect much interaction, lol{also don't actually post as many ocs as my early blogging, which was lonn ago}), i straight up see a wild difference in notes on art of thin characters vs fat. even with followers who claim to be fat positive.
it's just frustrating.
*characters who are stick thin, with a massive ass and tits, sometimes thighs, but somehow have a massive thigh gap?????
Its truly frustrating because like ok I have curated a dash that features like plenty of characters of color but very few fat reblogs. And since I've joined this blog its very annoying that I can't find loads of lovely fat art. I will say that its getting easier to find "fatshion" as a tag on tumblr but still we need to like maybe start another blog or event or both!!! Like i want something catchy though you know?
mod laina
ok I know I know I'm impulsive lol but I've started a side blog called Fat Fridays. here's our first post
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mazerunnersecretsanta · 9 months
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TMRSS23 Reveals!
🎅🥳 TMRSS23 Reveals are HEREEEEEEEEEE!!!! 🎅🥳 
Good to go? Have you seen the TMRSS23 Wrapped? Do you have your guess lists ready? Chaos gifs to hand?
All will now be revealed…!!
Here are the TMRSS 2023 santas!!
Thank you so much to all our wonderful santas, for all the creative and diverse gifts this year. What a gift to our fandom, truly!  
We hope that you all had fun participating in TMRSS this year. Thank you so much to those of you who have celebrated each other and our community. We have really appreciated seeing your likes, reblogs, yelling, livereads and overall excitement and appreciation for santas' hard work. 
Please do continue to reblog and share the creations! Reblog, rec, tag, comment - show our santas some love!
Santas: 
if you want to post your creations on your own blogs, or anywhere else, go for it!  We’d be really, really grateful if you could tag/mention “tmrss23″ when you do 🥺🙏  Also, go ahead and publicly thank your betas, cheerleaders, or pets if you want to - there’s no longer any need for secrecy! 🙅‍♀️🕵️‍♀️ (We can let you know who your betas were, if yours was arranged through our tmrss system.)
We’d like to personally thank the following people:
@whiterubys for designing our fabulous banner and icon - check out Anne’s blog for more gorgeous gifs and edits! 
Our wonderful pinch hitters: @seaselkie, @persnickett and @purplepingupenguins and kind beta readers: @jo-the-unknowable @itsthemxze​ @astralpenguin and @persnickett 
You’re all absolute tmrss angels and we appreciate your help so SO much!! We could not run tmrss without being able to rely on our wonderful pinch hitters and betas, who are such essential supports to us during the event. Pinch hitters: thank you for being the reason that no one is left without a gift, which is so very important. Thank you, tmrss stars!!!!!!! 😍👏
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Thanks again everyone for participating this year!! Hope you had fun!
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Hope to see you all next Christmas, for tmrss24…! 😉🥳
Dreams and Bridge 🎅🎁
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crowtrobotx · 5 months
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I know this is out of the blue, but thank you so much for being a real one 👍✨️
Like I have nothing against people who see Heisenberg as a gay man, they’re entitled to think that. But I draw the hard line at people who feel the need to bash others just because their views don't align, and then when confronted use the piss poor "it's just a joke" or "it's just an observation" excuses. If you're going to be a bitch at least have the balls to own up to it.
Anyway, loved your work since 2021 and wishing you all the good vibes. 🤗
Oh my goodness, thank you!!! This is such a kind message and I appreciate you so much. ❤️ Good vibes right back at you. I’m glad that my rantings have resonated with folks because sometimes I wonder if *spongebob voice* I’M the maniac. Getting dragged into this stuff really makes me feel like it sometimes, haha.
Yes! To be clear I also truly do not care what your HC’s are! I love that there are people for whom gay Heisy is their thing and I hope they are having fun and keep making their art/fic/etc! Even if I really can’t stand the popular fanon ship I’m so glad it exists for folks who enjoy it and I am not going to spend my time posting about what I don’t like/agree with when they’re not hurting me and I can spend my time on stuff I do like!
And like. I know. I KNOW a lot of these people are teenagers. And I struggle sometimes because “do not fight literal children” is a rule I try to live by lmao but I also really don’t like seeing people target and mock folks for harmless fun. (It’s on sight if a 25+ year old starts putting this shit in the tags tho. I know they’re out there.)
Still, it’s extremely weird because they always defend themselves with “it’s just a joke/it’s not that deep” or “oh my god no one is stopping you from liking x why are you so pressed 🙄 i can’t believe you’re letting my nasty opinions bother you just because i put them right where you can see them with the intent of insulting you.” 💀💀💀 Like what could possibly be the point of doing this if not to, at the very least, actively try to dissuade people you don’t like from engaging with the community? Obviously no one can stop me but if I know that there are dickbags out there who are going to vaguepost and make fun of me when I do, I don’t care how confident and thick skinned you are (and I am very,) it’s still going to sting!
People are not bothered because they’re disconnected from reality and think they’re really married to a pixel man, they’re upset because life is hard enough and you come into your hobby space to have a good time and then find lame ass idiots infesting it. I also think the whole “ohhh my god why are you so upset he’s/she’s not real!!” is a blatant attempt to discredit the hurt parties by once again insinuating that they are “crazy” which once again conveniently ignores multiple realities, chiefly that 1) most people are not upset by a simple opinion that their fave wouldn’t fuck them IRL, they are upset at the blatant meanness of the person making the accusations and 2) even if they are genuinely hurt by the thought because it’s a coping mechanism for them, why does that make it okay for you target them? What gives you the right to harass and mock people who are not bothering you? Do these people think they’re doing these folks a ‘favor’ by forcing them to contend with what they perceive to be some kind of delusion? Shut the hell up. Why do people decide it is their god given right to hold strangers on the internet accountable for psychological “problems” that they’ve completely made up.
Anyway SORRY I have a serious problem shutting the fuck up lol. I have never been good at phrasing my thoughts in a coherent way especially when I’m grumpy. I am very glad my little circle is full of awesome, open minded and levelheaded folks and not gatekeepers/weirdos (derogatory) who have decided that diversity of opinion in fandom is bad actually and that women and femmes specifically are enemy number one.
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eldrichfuck666 · 1 year
Note
📩 Simblr question of the day: Do you have any blogs that make your day when they post? Mention them! Tell us why you like them!
God, nonnie, I'm always so happy to see you here 🥺💗 Just know that I love you so so muuuuch, AND YOU MAKE MY DAY! :') regardless of who you are, nonnie, I love you because you're so wholesome and just- this whole thing with simblr question of the day is such a beautiful thing for connecting people and in general, it always feel so nice to know more about fellow simblr people :') You're so cute and you deserve all the the love in the world!
I HAVE WAY TOO MUCH TO MENTION, but basically all of my dash, my amazing mutuals, but I'll try to tag some people! :') AND PLEASE KNOW that if I didn't tag I didn't mean anything bad or just.. I always forget urls 😭 and tumblr won't let be tag all of you, but in general: you're amazing and loved by me if you're reading this now. Just by it's only fact, okay?? 💞🥺 I love you!!
@pralinesims - EVAN GOD YOU'RE SUCH A NICE PERSON AND SUCH A GOOD CONTENT CREATOR AND YOUR EDITS ARE JUST- AHHH I love your story, I love your ocs (esp Aaron & Luca!!), I love your cc content and I love how you write. And I also think that you're an amazing and just... probably sweetest person I've met on tumblr & your support and just... you make me feel so happy :') I hope that you don't forget to rest, and I hope you're doing well!! I love you so so muuuuch! :')
@birdietrait - I think that you seriously are a really talented person! You've been creating such diverse and interesting sims, and your simstyle just... it's more than beautiful and every single sim of yours gives me so much feelings, and I feel like falling in love with every single one. You're also so good at building and decorating, and just.. you're so kind ahhh 🥺💗 Every single interaction with you makes me smile and you're just.. you deserve all the love in the worlds, Birdie. Please know that I'm virtually hugging you & always think about you when I login to Tumblr. I love you!!
@crsentfairy - your male sims and just sims are so worth logging in this hellsite, too! Just everything you do have such unique style & just.. You're also such a cutie!! 🥺💗💗 I was so afraid to interact, but you're truly one of the most awesome, caring people that I've met, because you're always so supportive. AND ALSO I DON'T UNDERSTAND HOW YOU ALWAYS DO IT BUT- when you post new sims, I can't help but stare at them for some time to see more little details you've left. I'm in love with your aesthetic! ❤ When you post - I'm the happiest person ever, and I truly apologize for missing so much posts. But please know, that your posts are amazing and I love you.
@wildmelon - your simstyle is what I was inspired by, and just- I wish I had such as stunning simstyle 🥺 You're my inspiration to improve and make more new sims, and also, I just.. I have my notifications turned on for you! :') But I still miss a lot of posts (and I hate doing that, but I can't help it), and you need to know that you're an amazing simblr 🥺💗💗 You make this community so much brighter ;') and I just.. I love you, okay??
@silentsundown - your writing skills are so impressive and your Strangerville story is really, really catchy! I can't wait to read your story posts, because honesty they're just SO GOOOD and I love noticing the details in them. I love the way you write characters and just.. you made me so interested in Strangerville lore and just in general, in that world I never really played and explored. And you've opened it to me from such an interesting side 🥺 You're an amazing writer! :') And I also adore your personality 💗💗 I love you!!
@lucidicer - when I first saw your edits, I was SHOCKED at the quality and details and the way you just do everything! I still sometimes come back and just scroll though your simblr, because there's so much gems ahhh 🥺💗 I just love everything you do. It... it feels more like true art, to be honest. It's so authentic, and just.. AHH YOUR VISION! Your creativity, vision and just the quality and the amount of effort.. I love you. And I love everything you post! :') Thank you for bringing so much beauty to my dash & for being such adorable person! 💗
@salemssimblr - GOD I'M SORRY FOR THIS BEING THE FIRST THING I'VE THOUGHT ABOUT BUT.. When I first came across your simblr, I couldn't understand if it's really a TS4, because your blender skills are just so amazing and you- At first I was so scared to interact with you 😭😭 And I apologize for that! I'M STUPID I KNOW but just.. Your renders give me that... Stendhal syndrome feeling, that type of overwhelming when you look at the art THIS beautiful and just can't comprehend it, understand how it's possible and just.. EVERY TIME YOU POST MY JAW DROPPED AND YOU SHOULD KNOW THAT FOR SURE SKSKSK because that's truly.. I don't have an english word for that, but the "hauntingly beautiful" is the closest thing. I just- Also, WE NEED TO TALK ABOUT YOUR STYLE and the vibes I'm getting and just.. your renders are full of emotions. And the way I can feel them though the screen is incredible! I don't know how you do it, perhaps you're a magician, but you have such beautiful vision & the way you express it and make such meaningful things... And also, you MADE ME LEARN BLENDER MORE!! :') You made me think of doing more renders and despite of the fear of the failure, go and try again. You're such an inspiration for me and I also need to mention that I adore your personality. 🥺🥺 You're so caring and sweet and so supportive- I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU AHHH I JUST LOVE YOU SO MUCH AND I CAN'T BELIEVE WE'RE MUTUALS
@warmsol - it doesn't matter what you're posting, because the only fact of you posting is what makes me want to not leave simblr yet. Your whole simblr is what gives me so much of a mood boost, although I'm a complete opposite to the things you make — I hate sun with a passion, I'm afraid of nature, but somehow.. your bright, enchanting, sunny edits and builds always make me feel alive. It means so much for me, because I can feel the nature though your posts — despite feeling incomprehensible fear of if. You make me want to feel the sun on my skin, you make me want to go outside and feel it all, despite you already do - because I can feel it just by looking at your beautiful edits. Your edits are like... fresh, playful, warm summer wind that shakes the leaves on the trees making them appear as a gentle silhouettes of sun on the wall. I know, my english is quite confusing, but I think you'll understand what I mean. You make me feel alive. And I can't.. I can't stop myself from saying it, because I often don't feel it, but your simblr is something else. 💗 I can write essays on your edits, on every single detail that I can't help but keep catching with my eye. I love you :') 💗💗💗 Thank you for making it worth to stay here.
@kashisun - firstly, I'd say that your posts are all so beautiful, and your simstyle is something that always inspires me. Your gameplay posts are also filled with such amazing things and details, and god, they're simply so adorable! And about your sims — i, again, have no idea how it's possible to create so much different, interesting sims. That's sure is a true talent 🥺💗 And the way I was able to even find myself in some of them is ahhh I HOPE YOU KNOW IT MEANS EVERYTHING FOR ME OKAY?? Also, I still can't forget the African King & Queen posts, and also Sailor Moon one! 💗💗 I don't what I'm saying here, but I'll remener them forever because these sims just...my brain can't help but think about them, sjkss. I hope you know that I truly love! And I love your simstyle, and I love everything you do and post 🥺💗💗💗💗 I LOVE YOU!! :') Your renders are also so amazing and ahhh you're so good at EVERYTHING!! 💖💖
@isthisdesire98 - you're one of my first mutuals on this website, and god, since the day we became mutuals I couldn't help but fall in love with your simstyle & just basically everything you do, because your aesthetic & music taste is something to die for. Your love for Ghost IS JUST AHHHHH GOD!! It's always so good to see your Ghost renders, and just in general, your renders, on my dash 🥺💗 Also! Your edits are beautiful and your sims are just chef's kiss! I LOVE YOUR AESTHETIC SO MUCH IT'S SO GOTHIC AND DARK AND I JUST- AHHHH I don't know how to emotionally express it in any different language than Russian, but- I love it so so much! And the moment you started making renders I just.. I DIED FROM MY OWN HORNINESS EVERY SINGLE TIME AND I'M ASHAMED TO ADMIT BUT I HAVE TO LMAO SKSKSKS
@damseljamsel - Rosa's story is a really, really interesting one and I'm so glad that I've found your simblr because I love the way you describe everything in your story & I LOVE ROSA SO SO MUCH and I hope that ending won't be too sad ssksks but anyways, I always can't wait for your next story posts because god they're so interesting and I also love the edits your attach to them! :') I love your screenies so much and I love Rosa and I love your writing because god, the way Rosa's writing a diary is so believable and lively! 💖 I read your story even when I have no energy, because the format is so good and I just can't help but read because again i can't wait skskss SO YEAH I love you so so muuuuch! 🥺💗💗
@2013trait - you're always so supportive of other people and just- I hope that you know that you deserve as much love too! :') AND GOD YOUR POSTS MAKE ME SO HAPPY BECAUSE when you post you sims I just- I basically go crazy because your simstyle is so good 🥺💖 And I love the details and I love how unique they're! :") You deserve all the love in the world, and I hope you know that I think of you! 💗💗 I love you, I love your sims and also, your personality!! 💖💖 I hope you're doing well!
@alinelie - GOD YOU'RE SUCH A TALENTED AND SKILLED BUILDER AND GOD- THE HANNIBAL AMBIENCE IN YOUR EDITS IS SO INTENSE THAT I SOMETIMES NEED TO IMMEDIATELY LISTEN TO LOVE CRIME AFTERWARDS Like?? AND GOD- your male sims are the ones I will always be ready to die for! Especially Graham Ventura, I just- I LOVE HIM I LOVE HIM. AND REALLY, that melancholic ambience in your screenies and decoration is just always so noticeable, and I can almost smell the cigarettes in the air, as well as that old books smell. You make me feel like I'm watching a movie, or like I'm a ghost walking around, breathing the air and just in general, being there as if being some kind of invisible present. AND GOD I want to live in your edits, pls, I want to be the ghost that haunts the mansion PLEASE LET ME 👁️👁️👁️ And! I love you! I hope you're doing well and PLEASE REMEMBER THAT I'll be praying for you and your exams :") I hope everything will be amazing for you & i wish you the best with this & in general!! 💗💖💖 And please remember to rest! :'> Sending you so much virtual hugs and support, I believe in you 🥺💕💕
@lotuso3o - NOW WHERE DO I FUCKING START BECAUSE THERE'S SO MUCH AHHH actually! Your sims are my crushes and I don't deserve any of them skksks but anyways, when I look at them I just adore! 💗💗 Your sims are so stylish and god they're all so cute 🥺 I love your simstyle & I love the atmosphere that I feel when I go to your simblr, like IT'S SO SOFT and I'm not a person to like soft things, but your content is amazing and that's all you need to know! :') I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOUUUUUUU 👁️💖💖💖 thank you for the adorable sims and screenies and everything on my dash, I truly love your posts so much! 💕 HUGGING YOU BECAUSE YOU DESERVE EVERYTHING BEST AND JUST- virtual hugs is all I can give but still sskskks I love you!!!
@nihilismtrcit FIRST OF ALL, you're a wonderful person and you deserve so muuuuch love! 🥺💖 I don't usually just love the gameplay or anything like that, but yours is just amazing and I love seeing your gameplay posts, because LISTEN they're full of this warm atmosphere and the love that I can feel though the screen and it's just so amazing! 💗💗 I also genuinely think that you're such a wholesome and caring person and god 🥺 You're always so kind to me and I don't deserve such kindness, but please know that you're soooo appreciated & loved by me! 💕 I love your posts and your simblr, because it's full of that warmth and that feeling that's so close to feeling like home, and god, also- FOR SOME REASON I can't help but accociate your simblr with Hozier (maybe because he's one of my favorite musicians and you're one of my favorite simblrs?? WHO KNOWS SKSKS), because god- your aesthetic is simply amazing, ahhh, I love you so much! 💗💗 And I hope you're doing really well, because you only deserve LOVE! so much love you can't even imagine how much!! 💖💖 Thank you for being such amazing person and for making your simblr such a warm and homely place 🥺💕💕 I love coming back to your blog because it makes me feel so happy!!
@noeyinthemist - I may repeat myself here or annoy you probably even more than I already did and it's probably going to be really long, but I can't stop myself from expressing everything that you single handedly made me feel, although I haven't interacted much and probably missed so much of your posts, BUT I STILL WILL SAY IT REGARDLESS SKSKS! Your whole simblr is a definition of "magic", because it gives me a pure magic feeling, like I'm reading an old fairytale, which is already very impressive & amazing, because this is such a rare feeling for me to feel (if it makes sense!), but just- your posts are magical, they're just truly are like illustrations from an old fairytale book, that is secretly is a portal to that fairytale. I can't explain it properly in English and be as emotional as in Russian & German, for which I really apologize, but still! Your posts are like a portal to a magical world for me 💗 Your simstyle is adorable, but I want to talk about your cluttering and building skills first, because that's something I know I will never be able to do. Your builds are full of a beautiful details, they're like... like something from a paintings, your interiors are something I truly can't stop staring at and being jealous (but in a good meaning!!!) about, because that's, ahhh, I feel like watching a Ghibli movie 🥺💕 Also, the love you put into everything you do truly amazes me, from the cluttering and creating sims, to editing — this is something that seems so impossible to me. You've been such an inspiration for me since I started following your simblr. You're amazing in everything you do. 💖 And I love you so so muuuuch! I hope you're doing well, and I hope life will treat you the best way possible! 💗💗 I'm sending you so much love ;') And virtual hugs, if you don't mind! 🥺💕💕 I love your simblr & your personality! 💖💖 Thank you for bringing so much awesomeness and magic to my dash. You make my day, truly, every single time I see you on my dash - and every single time you leave me amazed and literally in awe, because I really... I really don't understand how it's possible to do something so beautiful. 💞 You're- you're also such a beautiful and kind soul, ahh, I love you so much! 🥺💗💗 Thank you for making my days much, much better with your posts! You can't imagine how grateful I am for this 💖💖💖
@void-imp - I WAS SO SCARED TO INTERACT WITH YOU GOD TO THE POINT WHERE I CAN'T BELIEVE THAT IT WAS LIKE THAT SKKSKSS but you turned out to be so soooo cute and amazing, ahh! 🥺💖 You're always so supportive and kind to me, but since the ask was about posting, I'll say this: your renders and edits are a really great examples of the way digital art should be in galleries, and should be worshipped :') Forgive me my poor english, but! I truly think that your edits are just- they have such a special feeling to it. And the effort is, believe me, very visible and noticeable! Also, your OCs and the way you write about them 🥺🥺 Your writing is incredible and I can't get enough of your posts, so I'm always so so happy to see your new posts & I'm sorry for missing so much of them T^T But still, I think about your simblr when I log in, and it actually says a lot! And to be honest, I love every single OC of yours, BUT ESPECIALLY ECHO GOD- Echo is amazing I love her I love her I love her!! 💖💖💖 I love your every OC and I can't express how happy I feel when you post them or answer OC asks, ahh! :') I love youuuu! And I hope you're doing well, too! Please remember that I love you 💗🥺 And! Jag skäms för att erkänna att jag nästan glömde Svenska, så jag måste träna här. Jag gillar verkligen din blogg, och jag tror verkligen att du är en begåvad författare! Och jag skickar också en otrolig mängd kärlek och virtuella kramar. Tack för allt du gör! 💗💗💗💗
@helltrait - The way you create characters still amazes me, because I know for sure that I recognize your style even from thousands - I really like it very much and I apologize for my laconism here, because I'm still a little shy, but my God, you have insanely beautiful sims! 🥺💖 I love your simstyle & I love YOUR RENDERS YOUR RENDERS ARE AMAZING AHHH and just- I KNOW I SOUND LIKE A BROKEN RECORD BUT- I'm horny and I apologize skkss and also! I love your OCs, and I'm always so happy when you post 🥺💗💗 Your simblr is amazing :') And I love you!! I love you so so much! :')
@cinamun - I'm a bit scared to write it, but honestly, when I first came across your simblr, I just- I almost binge read your story, but to my own shame, I still haven't done it, but still! From what I've seen, you're an amazing writer and storyteller and I can't imagine how much effort you put into your posts, because the editing, the posing and everything- it probably takes so much time, but also, your writing is one of the most amazing I've seen. You completely broke me with the last story posts of yours, but in the best way — AND I DIDN'T EVEN KNEW THE CHARACTERS IN THEM! I just came across them and randomly seen, and still, it just- it made me feel so much sadness and overwhelming feeling of helplessness, it's just amazing how much talent you have to make someone who never seen the characters in that story post, cry from the emotions and immediate attachment. I can't explain it, but it just- I feel like it's such a rare talent that you have, and everything about it is so impressive and just amazing. You make my day with your story posts by ruining it skkskss 😭 But! I'm saying it in a best way, okayyy?? 🥺💖 I just- I wanted to say that I truly love your characters & story, and I know that I haven't fully read it yet, but when I will - I for sure know that I'll be even more crushed by it. Thank you for all the emotions I've felt 💕 You're such an amazing storyteller, oh my god.. You're- and you're also an amazing person. 💗 I hope you're doing well!! I love you 🥺💖
@rottengurlz - WHEN YOU POST NEW SIM I FALL IN LOVE WITH THEM IMMEDIATELY and I just AND I KEEP THINKING ABOUT YOUR SIMS SOMETIMES and just- I love your simstyle, your sims are just so stunning and honestly they have every fucking right to kill me or even to bury me alive because they're all so- SO HOT I'M SORRY BUT THEY'RE REALLY HOT!! And I love their styles, ahh, 🥺 and honestly, even if it sounds really stupid, sometimes I'm even too shy to look at your sims again because THEY MAKE ME BLUSH DO YOU UNDERSTAND?? And I love you. I love you!!! 💞😭😭😭😭 Thank you for making me turn into a tomato every time you post! 💗💗 I LOVE YOU SO SO MUUUUCH I LOVE YOUR SIMS!!!
@puppycheesecake - your simblr is one of my favorites, definitely, because your simstyle is gorgeous and god god god AHH I love your sims so so muuuuch! And I love that you post so much occults, because it's really not that often that I see mainly occults on simblrs, just- the fact that you make so much stunning occult sims with unique styles and personalities in them is just- I'M AMAZED WOW LIKE- 🥺 how is it even possible to make such beautiful sims??? And I need to also thank you for making lookbooks with links, because I'm always in constant search for good occult cc and your simblr is just- I imagine how much time it takes you, and I want to tell you that I really appreciate it! Because that's truly is a lot of effort and god 🥺💞 If it wasn't for you, I wouldn't find that much beautiful occult cc creators! AND ALSO just every time you post my heart is beating faster 💖 Thank you so much for everything you bring to my dash, for your beautiful occults because it's always a joy to see such amazing simstyle and OCCULTS! 💗💗
@celestos - I have so much to say about your posts and your simblr in general, but I honestly don't have really much energy (pls forgive me!), but I'd say that your simblr's aesthetic is truly so amazing 🥺💞 I always find myself looking at your posts again and again because of the atmosphere captured in them, because of that homely feeling and warmth it gives me. Especially your gameplay posts! They're like gentle sunbeams :') I can't explain it, but I love the how cozy they are! And god I adore your sims! 💗💗 I love you so so much! :') And I want to point out that your simblr feels like home to me, which is already a lot. And I'm so so thankful for feeling it 💖💖 I LOVE YOU & I LOVE YOUR SIMBLR 💕 I hope you're doing well!!!
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aceofwhump · 1 year
Note
Hi!
I have a question for you about the whump community, which you may admittedly be ill-equipped to answer, but I hope you can at least point me in the right direction for answers.
But in general, is loving characters being whumped a sexual thing? Sort of like bdsm, but they're fictional characters so it's okay that they're "actually hurt"? Or is something else the attraction? Im especially curious/confused since this doesn't seem to be hurt/comfort since the focus mostly seems to be on the hurt itself.
No judgement at all btw... I hope this isn't coming off as judgemental. And no judgement regardless of how you answer, but I've seen this kind of community a lot over the years and I truly am just very very curious.
Thanks! And have a great day!
Hiya! Thank you for asking so nicely. I'd be happy to answer your questions. I know this community looks strange and confusing from the outside but I promise we're all really nice and open minded people. So let me see if I can give you some answers!
So the whump community is made of up of people who enjoy the genre of fiction called whump in which characters goes through painful situations or experience pain either physically, emotionally, or mentally.
For some people yes it is a sexual thing. It is not that way for me so I can really speak about it but some people definitely enjoy whump in a sexual way. Nothing wrong with that. Then there's people like me who don't equate whump and sexual feelings at all. A great many if us (myself included) are asexual. There's actually a LOT of different reasons why we all like whump. I actually made a big post about this at some point. Let me just link that here. I highly suggest giving it a read as I go into the many many reasons why someone might enjoy whump. This article is also really good as you've got opinions and perspectives from a lot of different people in the community. And here's the link to my tag full of posts talking about why we like whump.
In my opinion (and this does vary within the community) things like hurt/comfort and angst are under the umbrella term of whump. Because whump can be just angst. It can include comfort but it doesn't have to. Personally I consider hurt/comfort really just another term for whump. Some people see them as two separate things. Some see whump as strictly just hurt and a lot of it with no comfort and h/c is the softer hurt followed by comfort and angst is just emotional hurt. I've always viewed whump as the umbrella term and h/c and angst are just subgenres of it. But we all differ a little on the definitions and that's fine. Basically, I say if you consider it whump, then its whump.
So yeah! It's a very diverse group with all kinds of reasons why we like this genre of fiction. I hope I was able to answer your question! If you have anymore just let me know :)
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leitereads · 3 months
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OC/WIP Tag Game!
Thank you so much to the lovelies @paeliae-occasionally, @drchenquill and @the-letterbox-archives (who actually created the tag game - it is such a fantastic idea) for tagging me!
Rules/Premise: Just open the floor for questions about your wips/ocs/creative process/etc.!
As I am writing this, I am embarking in a new creative journey, both by developing my own Vampire: the Masquerade (VtM) chronicle (a tabletop roleplaying game in which you participate in it as a vampire character) and by revamping my old WIPs into something I am truly passionate about. Also, I am developing a solo character for another similar tabletop roleplaying game (Vampire: the Requiem - Eugen Schulze), and it has taken a lot of my energy (in a good way) as of lately.
Therefore, the novel-focused WIPs are still being revamped/researched about, but I have no problem talking about what I have so far.
Seriously, ALL QUESTIONS ARE ALLOWED, from everyone. I'll answer anything and anyone hahah.
I sure will ask you all questions, since I am extremely interested in knowing more about your own WIPs/OCs as well, but for now I will be tagging @yourpenpaldee, @writelikethrollope and @noxxytocin! Thank you so much, and no pressure!
The Apocryphal Truth
I started writing this novel while I was still in high school, and the main character (Dr Edgar Frost) is someone who has been growing up with me. The premise of the WIP is based on Gnostic horror, and I play around with themes connected to memory, reality, consciousness, trauma and loss. It's set in the Victorian Era, and the characters are diverse, in almost everything. Some of the characters are the following ones:
Edgar Frost: an illegitimate son of a British earl, who is searching for a way of joining fragmented "minds", in order to reveal a higher truth. He is your brooding Sturm und Drang Byronic hero/anti-hero, with an angelic exterior, but ready to get his hands dirty if needed.
Cléo: A French-Egyptian orphan who ended up in custody of Edgar's father, suffering the same destiny as Edgar. She is a determined young woman, passionate about the arts, but also politics, and she was able to climb her way to the top through her cunning and leadership personality.
Jacques: French journalist who belonged to the French military and secret services of the time. He had his fair share of violence, and his hedonistic side took him to London, to spend the rest of his life away from the drama. Until he met Edgar, and now he stuck himself to that idiot.
The Immortal Emperor's Regicide
I don't have a lot of material regarding this WIP, because:
a) it is based on a tabletop narrative game as well, so part of the worldbuilding comes from there and,
b) this was originally a collective creative writing project, and I am no longer working with my writing partner, so all the characters they created don't exist anymore in this new version of the story, making it a complete new story.
But the overall premise is similar to the one of The Apocryphal Truth: Victorian-like setting, horror-fantasy oriented. Ghosts, lots of ghosts. Emotional (and blood) vampires. Eldritch Gods, etc.
Solo Character: Eugen Schulze
Dr Eugen Schulze is a vampire character made for a Vampire: the Requiem (VtR) chronicle narrated by a friend of mine. It is set in our current days, in Berlin. Eugen himself is an old vampire (from the 1910s) who was transformed at the end of WW2. He worked as a doctor and scientist, responsible for horrendous experiments associated with Germany's position on the war. Things didn't go as planned, and he stayed in torpor till the 90s/early 2000s, and during this time his ideologies changed (he now hates everyone). With a witty and sarcastic sense of humour, Eugen is someone extremely professional, and he is trying to reach apotheosis through his vampiric condition, by medical experimentation and by following Gnostic beliefs. He is also a great appreciator of goth and metal music.
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suffersinfandom · 1 year
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Okay, so I usually try to stay out of discourse and drama and all of that because I'm here to have a nice time, but I saw a post in the OFMD tag after the whole Blackbonnet/Stucky poll thing that I really need to type about. It's just... so bad. Like, I totally get disliking things (I dislike things too!), and I understand that OFMD isn't everyone's thing, but wow. WOW. Um.
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While the first part's annoying (point to the tumblr fandom that has absolutely no one in it with a victim complex, please), what I really take issue with is the last bit -- the assertion that OFMD's cast diversity is there to be "inclusive" and "progressive" when the narrative isn't. That's just not true? One of the reasons for OFMD's popularity IS its inclusiveness! People who have never seen themselves represented in a show finally *see themselves* in some of these characters, and I think that's lovely. And the show has a wonderfully diverse crew behind the scenes and in the writing room as well!
As for "the narrative being the opposite"... all I can do is assume that OP never bothered watching OFMD. It's the most genuinely, earnestly inclusive and progressive piece of media I've ever consumed.
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The acting in OFMD isn't stylistically different from any other show I've watched. The situations and lines are often comedic, Stede and Ed are definitely prone to dramatics, and plenty of the characters are pathetic (affectionate), but this is such a weird critique. Or maybe I just haven't picked anything up from a lifetime of watching media and being a massive dorkass theater nerd? Idk. Maybe they just think the show itself is cringe (I certainly don't think it is, but that's something I've seen plenty of folks who dislike it say) and that colors their opinion on the acting?
Also: where's the slavery apologism? As many other people have said, there's definitely room for good faith criticism of OFMD: its tendency to gloss over the existence of slavery, the rom-comification of real, historic slaveowners, etc, but there's no apologia in the text of the show. (Correct me if I'm wrong! I'm very white and will defer to others here.)
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I'm gonna need some sources. I've seen the various accusations, but never evidence or anything that couldn't potentially be explained with context. (I don't actually take much issue with this point -- it's not a crime to think someone's annoying -- I just don't understand the constant vilification of Taika.)
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"REAL gay piracy," lol. I can't say much about Black Sails since I haven't watched it (tbh it doesn't sound like something I'd be able to enjoy), but I haven't seen that much seriousness in the OFMD fandom. Do I have all of the annoying crewmates blocked? Do y'all feel like you have a lot to prove? I personally only became invested in this poll when I saw the death threats from Stucky folks, and my impression from my timeline is that most everyone else was in the same boat.
If you ARE taking these polls to heart, please don't! They're for fun (sometimes petty) fandom drama! Win or lose, we all love our ships and our communities and we really don't need to prove anything to anyone (I say, typing out a response to a thing that got under my skin, resolutely not touching grass).
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THIS is where I had to start typing. WHAT DOES IT MEAN. How is a show with multiple canon queer couples gaybaiting? Isn't "canon gaybait" an oxymoron, or has the meaning changed? (I'm old, genuinely lmk if my millennial ass is missing something.) Again, I can only assume that OP either hasn't watched OFMD or hates fun romcoms, because the gayness of it all isn't the only thing the show has to offer. My brainworms have better taste than that.
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It's some of the best gay rep I've ever seen and I would be delighted to see better! I mean it! I've been in queer circles for almost two decades and in fandom even longer; OFMD is some of the best, kindest, most loving, genuine representation I've come across in that time. I truly hope that it's just the beginning of a new era in media.
"Weak fandom output." I am *drowning* in fandom output and I love that for me! "Driest gay kiss." I'm sorry you don't like awkward middle-aged men who think they're unlovable coming together in what might very well be the first loving kiss either of them has ever had, but I think it's very sweet and moving! No fictional characters have ever owned my brain like this before! I love my silly traumatized queer pirates who can't communicate to save themselves. They're very beautiful to me.
Anyway, that's enough of that. I've released the pettiness and I'm going to go back to being annoying about seeing the lads again in just a few more days. <3
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