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thealphabetmurders · 4 years ago

Text

Laundry Day

Pairing: Prinxiety

Word Count: 3580

Summary: Virgil walks in on Roman with the door unlocked, causing him to realize some feelings he didn't know he had.From the sentence prompt: "I'm sorry, I thought this door was locked."

Triggers: anxiety, suggestive themes

Authors Note: This is my second Prinxiety fic in a month, what is happening to me?

Thank you to Koko on my Discord for the sentence prompt. This was really fun to write.

(Read on AO3)

Virgil didn’t mind his roommates, not at all. Sure, living in a city apartment with 3 other people sounded like a nightmare, and it was sometimes, but they worked together great. Logan was a surprisingly component chef, Patton was good at keeping the peace whenever tensions rose, and Roman encouraged them all to be active to match his own fitness lifestyle. Of course, they are also all close friends, but they had all had their own fair share of bad roommates, and after two years of the 4 of them living together, there was no reason to stop or for that to change. They were in a comfortable, domestic heaven.

***

The Home-osexuals Chat

P: Hey kiddos! Remember I wont be home for the next week because of the convention in Jersey, please do not slack on your chores, I will be upset if I come back to the house and nothing is done :(

L: This is Logan. I believe we still have the list you wrote out for us, we will do our best to abide by it.

R: You have nothing to fear Padre, we will complete everything you need us to!

Virgil looked at his phone, smirking, before placing back in his pocket, blasting the music from his large headphones as he gathered up his laundry as well as his roommates. He felt proud of himself for actually being ahead of schedule and doing his and his roommates laundry a day ahead of schedule.

Normally, laundry would be a task left up to the individual to complete, but 3 months into living with each other, Virgil quickly found out that his roommate absolutely despised doing laundry- a formidable task that Virgil had never had an issue with. So, his job was to wash, dry, and fold everyone’s clothes for that week. It was a bit awkward folding his very platonic roommates undergarments the first time, but after doing it for years, he barely bats an eye now.

With a huff, he reached down, and grabbed the three smaller plastic laundry bins and one large one on top of one another, the stacking made the baskets reach his chin. He struggled to the elevator but eventually made it up to the 14th floor and set the laundry down so he could begin folding.

Virgil began with the large basket- Princey’s laundry. It was the biggest and the most daunting out of the 3. With work out clothes and dancing attire and the fact that Roman spills on himself a lot, he goes through a lot of laundry. No matter. He begins his work at a steady pace, folding the shirts and shorts in the way that he knows Roman likes, separating the clothes in the basket by the occasion. Work out clothes and undergarments go on the bottom, everyday in the middle, and dancing/theater attire goes on top. Virgil let his mind wander about a couple projects he has to complete for work and a potential promotion that is in the works at his job. He bites his lip, shaking his head, wanting to distract himself from the pressures of work on his day off. He steadies himself and focuses on the polyester fabric between his fingertips and the sound of Hayley Williams’ voice.

Once he was finished, Virgil put the basket on his hip, feeling like quite the 19th century maid, and made his way up the stairs where Roman bedroom was. Patton and Roman essentially had control of the upstairs (it only being their two rooms and a bathroom) while Logan and Virgil claimed a hallway for their corner of the house. It didn’t take long to realise that Roman blasting show tunes while Logan was studying for his Masters was not going to work out.

Virgil sighed, knocking twice on the door decorated with golden stars and fairy lights draping on the outside. There was music Virgil couldn’t quite make out play from inside the room, so it is very likely he could have just not heard Virgil’s subtle knocks, “Ro, I have your laundry,” Virgil said, to no avail. He tried the door handle and it twisted successfully, so Virgil pushed himself into the room, “Roman, where do you want me-”

He cut himself off, unable to form any sentences after seeing Roman. It wasn’t Roman fault, Virgil caught him off guard. And it’s not like he was doing anything bad, and yet Virgil’s palm seemed to sweat and his throat dry once he saw Roman doing flexibility stretches. Roman was sat on the floor, holding his right ankle with both his hands behind his head, his other leg bent on the floor in front of him. Maybe it was because Roman was also completely shirtless or maybe it was the small and tight shorts that did not leave a lot to the imagination or maybe it was the way Roman’s olive skin gleamed with sweat under the lights, paired with his Adonis like body. Maybe it was all of that. Maybe it was none. But Virgil’s brain just went white as all he could do was stare.

“Ah, Virgil!” Roman let go of his ankle, and relaxed himself cross-legged on the floor, “I’m sorry, I thought this door was locked,” He stood up, towering over Virgil, stretching his arms a bit. Virgil nodded, dumbly, “Yea, uh, I knocked but the music-” Roman walked over to the speakers and turned off whatever cheesy pop song was playing, and now Virgil could clearly hear all the blood rushing in his ears. “The music is… Is no longer playing,”

“You okay there, Raggedy Angst?” Roman chuckled, clapping a hand onto his shoulder.

Virgil nodded, feeling the color in his cheeks rising and he is praying to God Roman is dumb enough to not notice the way he is avoiding his gaze, “Yea, uh, just a bit tired, didn’t get a lot of, um, anything to eat today?” He tried that, hoping he would believe him.

Thankfully, Roman did, sucking in a breath through his teeth, “Yikes, no sleep and no eating, that is really bad for you Virge,”

Roman grabbed the laundry basket from Virgil and it took all of his strength to not whine as his fingertips brushed against Virgil’s waist. Roman was talking, most likely about his sleep schedule or eating, but Virgil was not there.

Virgil was transported into his own personal 80’s style fantasy dream sequence, where Roman had him backed up against a wall. He had on that smirk that used to make him roll his eyes but now has him weak in the knees. Roman brushed the loose hairs out of Virgil’s face, which made him bite his lip and hold back a gasp.

Roman smiled, “You’re so sensitive,” And then he was manhandled onto the bed, Virgil imagining just how soft those silky red sheets would be against his back, as Roman straddled him and lightly kissed his neck before nibbling his ear, whispering into it, “You want me to show you how flexible I can be?” And Virgil wanted that. He really, really needed that. But he was shaken out of his daydream by Roman, the real Roman, shaking his shoulder.

“Geez, you really are out of it,” Roman crossed his arms, concern all over his face.

“Huh?” It took him a moment to process what Roman said, “Yea, I- uh, might have a nap,” He swallowed thickly, his conscious eating away at him from what he just imagined, “Do you- uh…” Virgil trailed off, attempting to find the words, “Do you always workout li-like, y’know… Without clothes,”

“Not typically, no,” Roman shrugged casually, seeming unbothered by the question, “It is just you were doing my laundry when I normally do my stretching, and I didn’t have any clothes to wear. You are a day early,”

Virgil nodded, biting his lip, rubbing under his nose, “Right well, uh, I am gonna have that nap now. Uh,” Virgil did a two finger salute, causing Roman to raise an eyebrow at the awkwardness, “Sorry, I am tired,” His eyes flickered to the left and right before exiting the room.

Virgil closed the door behind him, leaning against it for a moment, before groaning, “Well, fuck,”

***

Virgil may have gotten sleep but it certainly was not peaceful. The unwanted thoughts kept plaguing his mind, not even his favorite conspiracies YouTube channel could get his mind off of the golden-toned man.

“So, you’re having anxiety ‘cause… You find Roman attractive?” Remy took a long sip from his coffee before rolling closer to Virgil’s chair, “I dunno babe, this one is on you,”

Virgil spun around, angry, “How is this on me?”

“You should have seen that Roman is hot as fuck earlier,” Remy shrugged, “I look at him and am like ‘congratulations dude, you’re literally a 10’. I am honestly surprised none of you gays had a sexy dream about him sooner,”

Virgil cheeks warmed as he gripped the front of his fringe, “I did not have a…” He looked around, making sure there were no co-workers to overhear, “Have a sexy dream about Roman!” Remy raises an eyebrow and Virgil bit his lip, “Not in… So much detail,”

Remy cackles and pulled out his phone, shaking his head, “Ah man, that’s hilarious,”

“Look, it’s not like I have never thought Roman was attractive before, of course he is, but like, I don’t understand why I am having this… Reaction,”

Virgil and Remy were silent for a while, the the latter spoke up, “Maybe it’s all been like, building up and it just took one thing to make you realise, and that was Roman lewdly stretching out on the floor,”

He nodded, “I guess I do find my self seeking Roman’s company more so than anyone else, and we are like, always talking and texting,”

“So it was just a matter of your dumb brain making you realise you have feelings for him, so you’re not just in denial for the rest of your life,”

Virgil raised an eyebrow, “Well, that’s rich coming from you,”

Remy’s expression flickered from smug to sheepish, but blink and you would have missed it, “I don’t know what you are referring to,” He scratched the side of his face and took a long sip of his coffee while Virgil scooted in closer, placing his hands on his knees.

“Oh really? So, you are just never going to address the absolutely giant crush you have on Logan? How you keep having problems with your coursework that only he can help with? How every time you’re around him you always bring your Louis Vuitton galaxy bag in hopes that he’ll ramble about space?” Remy kept sipping his coffee, avoiding eye contact very casually, “We’re not going to talk about that?”

Remy stopping drinking, smacking his lips together and sighing, “Nope,” Virgil rolled his eyes, crossing his arms, “Do you even want to date Roman, or do you just want to f-”

“That’s a good question,” Virgil cut him off, as one of their coworkers walked by to get coffee from the breakroom, “I’ve been thinking about that, and I am not 100% sure. I know I am attracted to him in some weird, ambiguous way, but I haven’t even seen him since the- since the ‘incident’ so I guess I just have to find out,”

Remy nodded, “Well, good news is, you can find out right now,” He gestured his now empty cup towards reception where the devil himself was standing, dressed in his favorite form fitting red sweater tucked into black jeans. “Mm, he looks so good in casual wear,”

“Remy!”

“What?” Remy smirked, “Getting jealous? I may not want to date him but I am also not blind,” Roman walked over to the two men, waving with one hand, holding a drink carrier in the other one, flashing a classic 1000 watt smile.

“God, I bet he doesn’t even know how beautiful he is,” Virgil muttered to Remy, who just nodded.

“Hey, gorgeous, this certainly is a surprise,” Remy smiled, standing up. Roman set the drinks down before pulling him into a hug. He looked over to the drink carrier, pulling out the frappuccino he assumed was his, and collapsed back into his chair.

“What are you doing here today, Ro? You didn’t tell me you were coming?” Virgil frowned.

Roman leaned against Virgil’s desk, ruffling his hair a bit that was damp with moisture. His curly brown locks looked like that of a supermodel, or a 1920’s Hollywood actor. He sighed, putting on a soft smile, “Well, I got done with my lessons early and was in the area, thought I would surprise the two boys that are hard at work,” He looked around the office at everyone either on their phone or browsing Facebook on their computer, “Busy day, I take it?”

Virgil groaned, “We all just finished our projects for the month, so there is nothing new to work on, so we are just at work for the sake of being at work,”

Remy rolled his eyes, “I hate it here,”

“Capitalism really does suck sometimes. The 40 hour work day isn’t even productive. Studies find that people in typical office jobs can accomplish all their work in 3 hours, and to force someone to be at their job for more than double than length actually can cause a sharp decrease in productivity, or, what was that called, Virgil?”

Virgil was taken aback, “It’s called presenteeism. Wait, you were actually listening while I was rambling about that?”

Roman shrugged, like it was the most obvious thing the world, “Of course I did, why wouldn’t I want to listen to you, Virgil?” He softly smiled at Virgil, placing a hand tenderly on his bicep.

Remy smirked into his frappuccino, trying not to say anything while Virgil attempted to not scream.

Internally, he let out the biggest groan, “Well, fuck,”

***

Was Virgil avoiding Roman? Yes. Was he doing it in a way that was super obvious? Of course. Did Logan scold him for a little bit for taking over the kitchen table with unfolded laundry? Undoubtedly. When Virgil finally calmed down a bit from his gay panic (and regular panic), he tackled the pile of laundry he had been avoiding. Many of the clothes were now wrinkled from sitting out so long, so he had to get out the ironing board and tend to those as needed.

He hummed to the lo-fi beats coming from his headphones, ironing one of Logan’s shirts, beginning to relax, when his headphones were ripped right off his head, just as he was beginning to get lost in thought and maladaptive daydream.

“What the hell?” Virgil looked up and saw Roman holding the headphones on the tip of his finger, an eyebrow raised. He was wearing a show shirt that he cut the sleeves off of as well as most of the torso to make into a 00’s style crop top. “Oh, h-hey Roman,”

Virgil was distracted. Distracted that the object of his fantasies was standing right in front of him, looking a bit annoyed and confused, as well as the fact that he was wearing that particular crop top and Roman always looked so good in white… He was distracted, so he ran over his own finger with the iron.

“Ow, fuck!” He exclaimed, gripping his right finger, tears pricking in the corners of his eyes.

“Oh my Lord!” Roman rushed over to the kitchen and began frantically opening cupboard doors, “Where is the first aid kit, where is it,” He muttered to him,

Virgil breathed out heavily, “Roman, don't worry about helping, I- I got it,” He rushed away, making a beeline for his and Logan’s bathroom. He turned on the cold water and thrust his entire hand underneath the rushing water, the cold mixed with the warm from the burn made for an uncomfortable sensation.

“Okay, what is going on with you?” Roman opened the bathroom door (shit, Virgil forgot to lock it) holding the first aid kit, “You have been avoiding me and been weird ever since I came to see you at work. Was it the fact that I surprised you at work, or something?”

Virgil was not sure if Roman could see the bright blush on his cheeks but he would be a fool not to notice the stutter in his voice, as he pulled his hand away from the sink, “O-oh I really didn’t min-”

“Ooh, that looked really bad,” He commented, interrupting Virgil. He manhandled him closer towards himself and held a tight grip on his wrist and he uncapped the burn cream and liberally spread it across his finger, “I have been burned multiple times before, don’t worry, I will take good care of you,”

Virgil is on fire. He is on fire and he is dead. Roman’s eyes twinkled a bit as he hummed lowly an adage that he did not recognize, but it had the melody of Disney. His lips were parted slightly, thankfully not noticing the long minutes Virgil was staring at them. When Roman dragged a tongue across the bottom one and bit it as he was wrapping the bandages, it took all of his willpower to not say something, instead opting to cover his entire face with the hand not being treated.

“There you are, all finished!” Roman patted down the wrap and kissed the bandages, just to add insult to injury.

Virgil nodded vigorously, “Okay, thanks Roman, bye,” He attempted to move around Roman, but Roman’s wide frame compared to Virgil’s small one made it a losing battle.

“Easy, you’re still being weird, what is going on with you?” Roman gripped Virgil shoulders, and he was avoiding eye contact with the beautiful man in front of him.

Virgil should just say something, tell Roman, rip the band-aid off, and they can get on with their lives after a couple weeks of awkwardness. These past couple days have been absolute torture, he doesn’t know if he can keep it up.

But, his anxiety has something else to say.

“Just, forget about it Roman, I’ll tell you some other day,” Virgil mumbled, if the bathroom hadn’t been so quiet, neither of them would have been able to hear it.

The other man sighed, dejected, and Virgil felt a pang of guilt, “Okay, fine, you are under no obligation to tell me, just know I miss talking to you,” Roman lifted his hand to brush the hair out of Virgil face, and of course, his body had to betray him with a involuntary whine, “and I-” Roman cut himself off, raising an eyebrow at the noise. Virgil wanted nothing more than for the floor to open up and swallow him whole. He is sure he is going to be the first person to actually die from embarrassment.

“Virgil?”

He swallowed thickly, eyes squeezed shut, “Yea?”

A beat. “You like me, don’t you?”

Normally, Virgil would respond with some snark or a belittling comment towards Roman, but his nerves were turned up to 10 and he couldn’t even think straight (more so than usual), so in the vast sea of sassy remarks, there was not one to be found.

“Yes,” He responded, honestly.

There were a couple moments of deafening silence in the bathroom where Virgil thought Roman was going to sigh, disappointed in him or hit him or kill him. All irrational, but all seemed very likely in his anxious state.

“Virgil?” Roman asked again, his voice softer.

“Yea?”

Roman placed a hand on his shoulder, “Can you look at me?”

Virgil sighed, slowly placing his hands down to his side, looking up into Roman’s wide brown eyes. He had on a soft smile. Before Virgil could even register what was happening, he was being lifted up by his thighs, his legs instinctively going around Romans waist and arms around his neck. Roman then pushed Virgil back against the wall, holding him there for a passionate kiss.

At first, he didn’t kiss back, so shocked by Roman’s bold actions that his brain was lagging like a 2006 Chrome browser. Roman began to pull away, but once Virgil’s brain caught up with his body, he pulled himself closer to his partner and kissed back with a passion and fervor that he is sure Roman did not expect.

If this were a movie, the lightbulbs in the bathroom would have burst and the music would have swelled, but instead, all Virgil could sense was the softness of Roman’s lips and the heavy weight lifted off of his shoulders. The feeling of ecstasy made his legs tingle, almost causing him to lose his grip on Roman and collapse onto the tile.

Virgil one the one to break the kiss, resting his forehead against Roman’s chuckling slightly, “So, I am guessing you like me back?”

“Have for a while now, Virge,”

The two of them chuckled, peppering soft kisses onto each other’s faces that would normally make Virgil gag, but now it made his heart swell.

They heard the front door open and slam shut and a sigh came from the kitchen, “Really kiddo?” They heard Patton yell, “You couldn’t get the laundry done before I came home?”

Virgil sighed, frustrated, leaning his forehead on Roman’s shoulder.

Roman chuckled, amused that Virgil was about to get chewed out, “Someone is in trouble,”

He groaned, tightening the grip on Roman’s waist, “Well, fuck,”

A/N: By the way, here is the link to the stretch that Roman was doing. I did my best to describe it, but if you need a visual, here.

#prinxiety #sanders sides #thomas sanders #roman sanders #virgil sanders #fanfiction #my writing #and that is all the tags

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daandori · 4 years ago

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mint tea, jasmine tea and ice coffee!!

mint tea: how do you relax?

i looove taking long baths and watching some fave youtube vids (usually media analyses or commentary vids) w my fave snacks!! in general i usually watch something funny or lowkey to decompress, and sometimes ill play a game at the same time

jasmine tea: if you could go anywhere in the world, where would it be and why?

i think i would probably go back to korea, although japan is a close second!! ive rly been missing my life there, and i was kind of planning to go in august but that’s probably not gonna happen hahaha (but it probably wont be as fun without anyone to hang out with there rip)

iced coffee: do you like reading? if so, what’s your favorite book?

ahaaa i was just saying to my friend today that i wish i was as voracious a reader now as i used to be when i was a kid ;o; i feel like i already read less in hs and then uni just finished me off

so i do like reading in theory but do i do it? not rly lmao (also this is a yikes now but my fave series is probably still harry potter,,,,)

#ask #thanks for asking maddy!!!!<3333 #if anyone has good book recommendations pls lmk #i need to stop being trash lmao #brokuro

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tifs-against-terfs · 6 years ago

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I watched Kalvin Garrah’s “transtrender rant: congrats on female to female or some shit” video so you don’t have to

Oh shit here’s where the “I hate children experimenting with gender” genre of kalvin videos starts

this motherfucker has sponsors?? What business executive????

what the fuck is he talking about “transition from female to female??” So you have to present as the gender you identify as to be valid? Ok SORRY I didn’t know.............

“we’re gonna talk about someone I know personally that goes to my school” Yikes talking shit about people you know irl on a public forum where you have thousands of people that look up to you

“I would hear people refer to her as some weird, lord of the rings name” Making fun of trans peoples names isn’t progressive fam

“She identifies as gender fluid and pansexual *disgusted voice*” yikes ok so we’re making fun of people with perfectly unproblematic gender identities and sexualities? ok

“I don’t believe in genderfluid” yeah. Yeah we know kal.

“I will respect you, as long as you do have dysphoria” *assumes everyone with a gender identity he doesn’t like is nondysphoric* like fuck off

“I need medical or scientific proof in order to respect a gender identity” *is given proof* “lmao that’s not real” Just a prediction. Haven’t seen it yet but I have a gut feeling.

“She walks around in no binder, showy clothing, if you actually have dysphoria you wouldn’t have your tiddies out” ok but consider this. Perhaps. Just maybe. This person experiences bottom dysphoria? Or any other type of dysphoria? And also, just a thought, perhaps you should uhh mind your own damn business?

“So this afab person responds to a trans womans transition timeline photoson tdov ‘Wow, you look amazing! Happy tdov from a fellow transfeminine person!’“ UMMM Ok im kinda on kalvin with this one thats sort of a big yikes..... you can identify as whatever you want and i wont give a shit but if you’re afab and you’re, for example, a demigirl, pleaase don’t call yourself transfeminine..... I’m 90% sure that term is reserved for amab people

Yikes there he fucking goes saying “born female” again

Ugh ok I get the title now

“She ignored everything we tweeted because she’s a pussy” She could’ve just not wanted to be involved in discourse or negative shit but ok.

there’s the “I’m a TRUE trans person who has SUFFERED for my gender identity, something no mere trender could EVER POSSIBLY experience.”

Yikes more making fun or trans people names.

LMAO “most trans guys I know pick names like Kalvin, or Conner, or Fred, but all trenders pick names like WILLOW or ZEN, my ex is going by zen now.” Giving out peoples real names is not a great look kal

“willow says she wants to try going by he/him pronouns, im gonna give you a little tip here, do you really think that embracing your female chest, walking around tiddies out, presenting 100% feminine, do you really think people are gonna be like that’s a man, thats a he.” So obviously kalvin thinks people should be misgendered based on their presentation nothing new

“this other trans guy hates me and talked shit about me on tumblr, even though I put him in my phone as the right name” Ok so apparently thats just the fucking epitome of human respect ok

“My school tried to get me arrested for one of my youtube videos” WHICH ONE BITCH YOU CANT JUST SAY THAT AND NOT TELL US WHAT VIDEO IT WAS

“Ma’am I am trans, so im not transphobic.” Are you fucking serious. Of course you wouldnt believe another trans person can be transphobic.

“I don’t think this guy is like this anymore” then maybe have you considered shutting the fuck up and letting it go??

“i was kicked out of the GSA at my school twice” ok ill admit that’s pretty shitty

“I’m sorry that I believe in SCIENCE” oh my god shut the fuck up you sound like a terf

“This dude was talking shit about me, on tumblr which is like pathetic” *is talking shit about multiple people on fucking youtube in front of thousands of people*

Not trans related but using psycho as a derogatory thing is like, low key offensive to people with schizophrenia and similar disorders so like maybe dont

That’s all I picked up on if you have more to add please do I love y’all byeeee

#kalvin garrah #truscum #transmed #cis king #cis knights #tucutes #anti trender #trender #trenderman #trendersona #female to female

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bo-katan · 4 years ago

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re:ma yeah unfortunately the writing was one of the biggest problems for me, i'd recommend skipping the movie and just watching this funny and better 'review' www (.) youtube (.) com / watch?v=LVAw8FiEVa0

i knew it was going to be bad but haha yikes. Also, anon you did not say that video was going to be half an hour xD had to watch in faster speed but the person is entertaining for the most part.

Also, glad i watched this bc after Birds of Prey, I dont want to watch uncomfortable forced stripping especially if it’s with kids. Thankful i know about that scene and i wont be watching.

#inbox #anon #ma (2019)

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ladyanatui · 5 years ago

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Ultimate Daiken Playlist, Pt. 1

Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 | Part 4

This is the abridged version of my Spotify playlist for all things Daiken, mostly in order from the start of 02 to...eventually. Even so, this is still a pretty damn long list. My original aim was for 30 songs, but...uh, yeah, I surpassed that pretty quickly. It’s around 75 now. Yikes. So I split it up.

I have problems with self-control. Especially when it comes to my babies.

Part 1 specifically covers from the start of 02 to just after the defeat of the Digimon Kaiser.

TRIGGER WARNING: This post discusses depression, suicide, emotional abuse, and PTSD quite a lot. Take care of yourself, folks!

Spotify Playlist

Click the song titles for YouTube links (apparently you can’t have more than five videos in a post), and otherwise, enjoy me rambling about Daiken...as I am wont to do.

One final note: Within the lyrics, I’ve emphasized meaningful words, such as night/nightmare, dark/darkness, miracle(s), kind/kindness, courage/bravery, friend/friendship, sun/star/light, fire/burn/ignite, angel(s), and words related to water/drowning.

“I’m Just a Kid” by Simple Plan

I think I got a lot of friends But I don't hear from them What's another night all alone When you're spending every day on your own

I envision this as Daisuke’s life before becoming one of the Chosen, before meeting Ken. It’s pretty well established that Taichi and Hikari are the only legitimate friends he has during that time, aside from (possibly) his soccer teammates, but he’s not close with any of them. And worse, his home life is obviously not great: His parents ignore him, and his sister irritates him just to irritate him. That may seem like a normal brother/sister relationship, but a 17-year-old slapping her 11-year-old isn’t normal or healthy.

The truth is, Daisuke has no legitimate example of healthy family interactions, and in some ways, his home life is as emotionally abusive as Ken’s was. His parents insult him (his father calls him his “stupid son” when Ken first visits) and ignore him (Daisuke repeatedly says his parents wouldn’t notice if he didn’t come home and lies to them to avoid spending time at home), so he has no idea how to respond to compliments.

This also means that he latches on to the people he cares about, much the same way Jun latches on to attractive boys. He idolizes Taichi (calling him senpai when speaking with him directly), and he constantly seeks attention from Hikari. Since we don’t know what Daisuke and Hikari’s relationship was like before Takeru shows up, it’s all speculation, but Daisuke was probably way less aggressive and possessive of her before someone came to try to take his one friend away.

So Daisuke has no idea how to show affection (whether familial, platonic, or romantic) in a normal, healthy way. He’s never had a close friend (or any real friends probably), and he’s never been close with any of his family. He’s actually lived an incredibly lonely life.

“Dark Blue” by Jack’s Mannequin

This flood This flood is slowly rising up Swallowing the ground Beneath my feet Tell me how anybody thinks Under this condition So I'll swim, I'll swim As the water rises up Sun is sinking down

Similarly, this functions as Ken’s theme song for events prior to the start of 02. There are a lot of references to water--“flood,” “swim,” and I believe there’s talk about drowning as well--which is very fitting because of the Dark World (Ocean), but also because Ken obviously suffers from depression and the idea of drowning is one of the most used and most accurate descriptions of what chronic depression feels like (trust me, I know!).

But my favorite part of this is the last two lines from the quote. Let’s be real, the sun is a huge symbol when it comes to our goggle boys--they are bright, cheerful, energetic, and so fucking bright they could rival the sun itself. When Ken is so incredibly surrounded by darkness, Daisuke is the sun. There are so many things that support this, but most importantly:

The Crest of Courage is shaped like the sun. It doesn’t get more overt than that.

When V-mon evolves to Magnamon, it’s described as: “It was a miraculous evolution. As beautiful as the rising sun shining brightly on the world.”

Daisuke is the sun. Ken is the world. And Ken needs his sun to help him out of the darkness.

“Send Me an Angel” by Highly Suspect

Open fire on my burning heart I've never been lucky in love My defenses are down A kiss or a frown I can't survive on my own

Send me an angel Send me an angel Right now, right now

Before they met, before 02 actually starts, both Ken and Daisuke are effectively alone. Yeah, they’re surrounded by people (Daisuke more than Ken), but never of them have any real friends or close relationships.

This song is something I see Daisuke feeling in his more introspective moments (rare, I know), as what he needs more than anything is true love and companionship. When I say love here, I don’t necessarily mean romantic. While, yes, Daisuke has poor luck in romance (Hikari, hello!), he has poor luck with platonic love as well.

And I’m all for anything that references Ken as being an angel. Obviously, Ken would never agree to that sentiment, but a lot of the time, it feels like that’s how Daisuke views him. To Daisuke, [post-Kaiser] Ken is this amazing, beautiful, even verging perfect person, and you can see he feels that way just from the way he looks at Ken.

I also chose this song because it’s a small reference to something I drew not too long ago, which itself is based on a Lilo & Stitch meme.

“Duality” by Set It Off

I can't quite contain or explain my evil ways Or explain why I'm not sane All I can say is this is your warning

It's a cloak or disguise unleashed, gonna get it off No, I'll never get away Cause if I try to stray It only holds me closer No, I'll never get away I'll have it any way

Okay, this is very obviously a Kaiser song. But it’s also a Ken song. The whole thing about this song is that Ken is trapped as the Kaiser and doesn’t have full control over himself. And can he actually explain why he does the crazy evil shit he does? His explanation is that he thought the Digital World was a video game, but that’s obviously not the full picture. He can’t fully explain because the Dark Seed is what makes him evil as opposed to simply sad and lonely and traumatized.

“Numb Without You” by The Maine

You are my last, you are my first You kill me for the better You are the rising tide You're every fucking thing inside me now

You are the violence in my veins You are the war inside my brain You are my glitter and my gloom I am so numb without you

This is another Kaiser/Ken song. To an extent, this song has a sort of sadistic romantic aspect to it, but I’m choosing to ignore those undertones in favor of just the creepy sadistic part. This is sort of Ken singing to his Kaiser persona and also to depression in general. Because the Kaiser is the “rising tide” (oh, look another reference to water!) and the manifestation of his grief and trauma and mental illness.

But as the title of the song suggests, the Kaiser persona is also what allows him to still feel something. Without it, he’s in the complete numbness of his depression (which sucks, trust me), and he would rather have the Kaiser, who is violent and angry and bitter, instead of the absolute numbness of his grief and depression.

“Deer in the Headlights” by Owl City

Tell me again was it love at first sight When I walked by and you caught my eye Didn't you know love could shine this bright? Well, smile because you're the deer in the headlights

Met a girl boy with a graceful charm But when beauty met the beast, he froze Got the sense I was not her his type By a black eye and bloody nose But I guess that's the way it goes

Note: I (obviously) changed a few pronouns in the quote. It should be apparent what I altered based on formatting.

Here, we see the first time Daisuke and Ken meet. And I’m talking Ken (although evil Ken), not the Kaiser. Yes, this is referencing the soccer match they play against each other in episode eight.

It’s pretty damn obvious that eleven-year-old Daisuke is completely enamored when he meets the famous Ichijouji Ken. He blushes and stumbles over his words, and he is so overwhelmed and happy that Ken remembered his name after the match was over. He admires him, and when Ken tells him that he’s the first person to ever stop that move in the match, Daisuke just looks so pleased to hear the compliment.

Also, bonus points for any song that references the sun or light: “Didn’t you know love could shine this bright?”

“Love the Way You Hate Me” by Like a Storm

You say I'm insane I say You're afraid I get stronger from the pain I love the way you hate me

I'd rather be a sinner than a slave I'd rather be an outcast than just bow down and obey When it's all done there's only one Name upon my grave I'd rather be a freak than be a fake

Another Kaiser song. While the previous song could be placed pretty much any time during the first fifteen episodes or so, this one is distinctly set after they find out the Kaiser is Ichijouji Ken. The focus here is on the way the Kaiser (emotionally) gets off from how much the Chosen Children, Daisuke especially, fight against him and hate him. He enjoys watching them try so hard and keep failing because, while he desperately wants to have an opponent, he loves to win more--he does think it’s a game, after all.

“Lock Me Up” by The Cab

Why don't you Lock me up with joy and kisses? Lock me up with love? Chain me to your heart's desire

I don't want you to stop Lock me in and hold this moment Never get enough Ain't no way I'm ever breaking free Lock me up

This song is mostly in reference to the serious foe yay aspect to Daisuke and Kaiser Ken’s relationship for the first half of the series. The homoerotic subtext in their relationship is ridiculous, especially since they’re two eleven-year-old boys, one of whom (theoretically) has a huge crush on a female friend for the first half(ish) of the season. But you can bet that, if the Chosen Children had a second enemy during the Kaiser’s days, the Kaiser would be pissed and pull the whole “No! Motomiya’s my enemy. Only I can defeat him!” bit like he’s Kaiba Seto or something.

“Fallen Angel” by Three Days Grace

How can I take the pain away? How can I save...

A fallen angel in the dark Never thought you'd fall so far Fallen angel, close your eyes I won't let you fall tonight Fallen angel

But then there’s comes the very important part where Daisuke has a revelation. When he and V-mon meet Wormmon on the Kaiser’s base, Wormmon is determined and takes them to the Digimental of Miracles in an attempt to help them defeat the Kaiser and bring back his kind-hearted best friend. The moment Daisuke touches the Golden Digimental, something changes: It’s connected to Ken because it’s borne from his Crest of Kindness, and Daisuke is able to see that there’s more to Ken than his Kaiser persona. He knows that there’s good in him before they’ve even defeated him, and he wants to help him.

And seriously, bonus points for a song from Daisuke’s POV that refers to Ken as an angel. I’ll fight anyone who says he doesn’t see Ken that way. Legit.

“Breaking Down” by I Prevail

Lies, every time they ask me I just tell 'em that I'm fine Try to hide my demons, but they only multiply Keep me running from the voices on repeat inside my mind Everybody fucking hates you

I guess I never noticed how it came creeping in My enemy emotion but I can't sink or swim I say I'm feeling hopeless but no one's listening But no one's listening, but no one's listening

This song is in reference to the way Kaiser Ken’s psyche is falling apart. He’s having doubts. Creepy voices are talking to him. He’s confused about how the Chosen Children are actually defeating him. Chimairamon is a freaking nightmare and totally uncontrollable. And Ken is about to have a goddamn breakdown.

“Goner” by Twenty One Pilots

Though I'm weak Beaten down I'll slip away Into the sound

I've got two faces Blurry's the one I'm not I need your help to Take him out

Look how far we’ve come! We’re almost to the Kaiser’s defeat! (Dear god, this is a long playlist...)

Ken isn’t aware of how much he needs Daisuke to help him at this point. He’s too busy being the Kaiser and, you know, having a mental breakdown. But it’s important that Daisuke is the one there to help bring everything down. V-mon evolves to Magnamon and defeats Chimairamon with some badass moves (he is a Royal Knight after all), and Daisuke and the rest of the Chosen Children are finally able to get through to Ken.

“Not Gonna Die” by Skillet

Break their hold Cause I won't be controlled They can't keep their chains on me When the truth has set me free

Only when he realizes that the Digital World isn’t a game is Ken able to break through the hold that the Dark Seed (and Oikawa and BelialVamdemon, etc.) have on him. He tears off his Kaiser clothes and goes back to being just Ken. Just sweet, kind-hearted, adorable Ken.

Parts of this song, though, would be from Daisuke’s perspective. He’s determined, even though they have defeated their enemy, to help Ken, even that simply means sending him home to his family instead of letting Ken just waste away, which is frankly what it looks like he’s about to do during this scene.

“Tell Me Why” by Three Days Grace

Tell me why Does everything that I love get taken away From me? Why does everything that I love get taken away?

How come nothing ever lasts? It goes from good to bad to worse so fast All it takes is one and I'm gone, and you can't erase the past How come nothing ever lasts?

Obviously, this is a Ken-centric song, the focus being on his past when he saw his brother’s death, though Osamu’s death is nowhere near his fault. Yet again, Ken goes through a traumatic experience (Wormmon’s death), and for the first time, this is (somewhat) his fault.

While I linked the subs version, the English dub of this scene actually has a line almost exactly like this song: “Not again. Wormmon’s gone. Just like my brother. I was helpless to save him, and now I can’t save Wormmon either. Why do I keep losing people?”

Sorry, were you not wanting to cry today? ...Oops.

Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 | Part 4

#daiken #daisuke motomiya #ken ichijouji #digimon #digimon 02 #playlist #okay ultimate might be an exaggeration #but this is loooooong #and the actual spotify playlist is longer #i lack self-control #especially when it comes to daiken #welcome to my life #trigger warning #suicide #depression #ptsd #mental health #emotional abuse #anatui

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phantomoftheblank · 5 years ago

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Authortube is horrible and why I’ve turncoated to Booktube. I wont apologize but I will argue.

I’ve consumed about 5 hours worth of Authortube just to write a shitty think-piece about it, so now we gotta have this talk. If you’re unaware of what I’m talking about let me explain; YouTube is a website that used to be about cat videos but now splits itself into subsections THAT ARE DEFINITELY NOT CULTS, but kinda looks like it at times,

Though these genre’s aren’t really official, there is a genre for just about everything, and creative things especially. You have plenty of genres and way too many Youtubers to express it, and despite my pretentious nature I actually love how congested it is because it means its accessible to almost everyone, anybody can pretty much join in,

(Yeah I know, what a progressive queen I am, please give me claps for the bare fucking minimum,)

Gaming is probably the biggest on YouTube right now, but we like to pretend that it doesn’t exist and consume that content in the darkest corners of our house and pretend we don’t like it. Anyways; Authortube is kind of self explanatory and despite what a man-splainer I am as a 21 year old female, I think you get the point on what it is,

Well, with Authortube, we are making books to be consumed, and with this happening, Booktube has also bloomed. And in my judgemental opinion, it is actually better, and no, I’m not gonna go on the rampant that “we need to learn our audience” because preying on a bunch of minors doesn't sound very nice.

Or legal, actually, yikes. It’s not like that, don’t make a judgment, we authors just want their money, not their mental state. Okay, I need to shut up, let’s talk about shit posting again,

It’s actually not all minors, there’s plenty of adults on BookTube as well, which actually makes it that much more relatable, as to where Authortube is mainly adults who are going through routes to publishing their book or already have. Now, don’t attack me just yet, it’s my turn to argue honey and I brought an unloaded gun to the canon fight, I have an example for you.

Let’s take a look at Jenna Moreci, who is lovely, but also pretentious as all fuck. So me, but successful, not broke, prettier and in video format. In all seriousness I understand her audience, it’s primarily youthful writers looking for advice or writers looking to self publish because they see a success story, but this advice is all very mediocre and this isn’t a Jenna problem, this is an Authortube problem, Jenna Moreci is just an unfortunate example to explain my point,

She’s even made certain content I can consume and not wanna spittle up, but it’s only when she herself is in the frame, and mainly when writing is not what she’s trying to teach me about. Jenna as a person with personality is quite lovely and very watchable, but Jenna as a self-publisher is part of the reason why I’ve turncoated.

Writers aren’t puppies, you can’t teach them tricks, and though writing advice is important to get, I don’t see there being a lot of purpose in having 18 YouTubers telling me Show not Tell, but never following the same advice.

You don’t get that lecturing attitude from Booktube, you get lovely personalities like Ariel Bisset and hilarious reviews from Cat (Paperbackdreams) and it actually becomes more watchable because it feels more genuine because they’re actual people in front of a camera, talking about what they enjoy, that’s because they aren’t trying to sell you something.

To compare two examples, for Authortube we’ll use Jenna Moreci, and for BookTube, we’ll use LilyCReads,

LilyCReads, a BookTube channel, who used to do hilarious reviews on plenty of books, in a more so ranting fashion, and this worked for her, her audience grew a lot because of it. But eventually, she felt so obligated to make rant reviews she stopped enjoying the process of making the videos entirely, so with this being her emotions, she took down her rant reviews due to feeling too negative about it. Her greatest fear was becoming a rant review channel focusing on negativity. Though many of these videos I loved from her, she took them all down, which at first, was a bit saddening for me, as I watched those videos after a long day, oftentimes repeatedly, but I could not deny her genuine emotion to not wanting to be negative.

And honey, I can’t relate, but I can say LilyCReads is one of the most genuine faces you will see on camera now. Has her subscriber count faced a backlash to this? Yes, she took down what -- in my opinion -- was her best videos.

I don’t laugh when I watch her videos anymore, so this isn’t to say Booktube is perfect but I can say she is much more of a person for it and has not re-uploaded the rant-reviews for viewership at my time of writing this.

And then we have Jenna Moreci, as we’ve discussed is very likable person and that’s why she’s succeeding, but it’s very hard to get a genuine feeling from her unless you have a bias to content you’ve enjoyed from her, so eventually “Cyborg” starts feeling less like a joke, and more like a reality,

This leads us to a very conflictive point, which is Marketing; and trust me, I don’t wanna talk about the marketing of a book no more than you wanna read about it, but the bottom line is we can’t finish this topic without at least mentioning it,

And it is worth mentioning because that is actually the drive that most people start these channels with. Though for some I’m sure they do actually enjoy it, but others whom I won’t mention, it feels as genuine as my hair extensions; looks right in certain angles, but is definitely about to come unglued.

It’s worth mentioning that I only started this blog because I wanted to become involved within a writing community and eventually begin marketing my own shitty book I wrote, so I come at this with not judgment, but a realization. The only reason I continue to do this right now is because I find a genuine enjoyment from it, but I don’t get to choose when my writing feels genuine to you, and it is only fair to mention, that those were the intentions I started with.

I understand the point of marketing but it’s also worth mentioning how fucking skeezy that actually is, when our audience is more of a person than we actually are as writers/authors. And if you’re reading this as somebody who isn’t a writer, but is a reader, then you’re in the clear, but if you’re a writer, be aware of this before you bleach the side of your head to maintain a “funky skunky stripe” and start a Tumblr blog like I did.

I was a redneck before this, can you believe that? Shame. I feel lots of shame.

Now, I’m not saying marketing your book makes you evil, I’m just saying that it’s hard not to get wrapped up in the business mindset because publishing a book on your own is fucking terrifying. It’s scary to realize that you may have put months/years into a book that will flop because you made 2 less Instagram posts last week. Trust me, I get it, but at some point Authortube took a great plunge.

And though yes, this is all my opinion, I think we all know it’s quite clear I really only care about what I’m saying at the moment, so I really don’t give two shits about who you watch on YouTube, but I will say, if you enjoy Authortube, you’ll love Booktube, and I hope you love both, because both have important places.

But I’ve become biased to people and I can’t help but scan every person I meet, see, or know to make sure they’re genuine. I like seeing people because we are surrounded by capitalization run amok. Everything is a god damn advertisement and it’s honestly driving me insane, so it is nice to relax, kick back and watch somebody read ‘Searching Around Nebraska’, a book I’ll never read, but listen to somebody talk about because at least I know they enjoyed it.

And it’s important for me to watch people enjoy things, I’ve lost all happiness in the void of my self-conscience telling me to pay for Facebook advertisements, I mean god damn guys my pretentious mindset has me syringe-ejecting serotonin from videos about red pandas, and injecting it directly into the bloodstream. It’s like crack, but cuter.

My point is, reading is hard and writing has fried my brain, support nice people with small channels because they’re more likely to write a diss track on me and that’s all I truly want. Bully me, mommy.

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prettywhenucri · 6 years ago

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September 2018 Music Recommendations

hewwo i never use tumblr but i thought i could use it to recommend music because im lame and love to share music. these are the albums i’ve gotten into and/or enjoyed this month. please enjoy gays. remember this isn’t put in any particular order. it just how it be.

1. Dear Evan Hansen

it’s lame i know but i only just hopped onto the musicals train and im starting with the musicals all my friends speak about 24/7. i probably don’t need to put this here because it seems everyone is already hyping this musical up already.

anyway if you’re like the 2% of people who have no idea what DEH is it’s basically a musical about some bloke called evan hansen. he runs into a guy called connor on the first day of senior year and connor signs his cast (evan fell out of a tree and broke his arm, thats where the cast comes from). connor steals this note that evan has, because he has to write himself notes to build up his confidence. later on, connor kills himself with this note near his body so everyone thinks its a suicide note to evan. evan pretends like he knew connor and makes up this whole thing where he pretended they were friends.

im not 100% if that plot was accurate because i haven’t actually watched it, im just going on what my gf told me and what i understood from the soundtrack.

its a freaking awesome soundtrack, though. the harmonies – whew! i love evans voice too. whew. listen to it my dudes!! it’ll only take an hour to listen to the whole soundtrack. i recommend it if you’re one to enjoy goose bumps when you listen to someone belting.

favourite track: sincerely, me

this is only because i find it so freaking funny. it’s just a bunch of goofs over something that’s actually quite serious. the line, ‘but i should tell you that i think of you each night, i rub my nipples and start moaning with delight.’ it’s always dangerous to listen to this song through earphones on the way to school oops.

spotify link: https://open.spotify.com/album/0LhDyJXelg31FKLW5GDcKi?si=pgXbmPmYRnShkIp3iGqI4Q

2. Heathers

WHOOP another musical that’s spoken about a lot. the soundtrack to this musical is Fucking Amazing. if you haven’t already listened to it, then you better go. right. now.

if you dont listen to heathers, firstly, you’re missing out. secondly, it’s a musical based on the movie heathers from 1988. the main character is veronica sawyer and shes one of the schools biggest nerds. she then meets the heathers in the bathroom and they make a pact that if she writes a bunch of forged notes then she can join their friendship group so she can be left alone. she goes on a huge journey of meeting J.D., seeing what it’s truly like to be popular, and finding out how scary her bf is. people die and shit, but im not going to say who or how. it’s up to you to find that out (unless you already know).

im not very good at condensing the plot to a story, so i am absolutely sorry if that was a terrible brief. but this isn’t about the storyline – this is about the music from the musical.

HOLY SHIT if you like 80s inspired music, then you’re in for a fucking ride. this soundtrack is SO GOOD. the adrenaline rush you get from the songs, especially candy store and dead girl walking. also veronica??? has the best voice EVER. her vocal range is so wild and her belting at the end of dead girl walking.... i have to cry Its So Good. just her singing capabilities? amazing. i love it so much. 10/10. please listen.

favourite track: dead girl walking

i mean it’s kind of tied with candy store but i fell in love with dead girl walking first. i remember when i was sitting in art class listening to it for the first time and i got CHILLS from how intense and fast pace it was. like. i had it blasted in my ears and everyone could hear (i knew because my friend who’s listened to the soundtrack countless of times was mouthing along to the words yikes) but i just sat there, still, amazed that such a song could make me feel such a way. shes just so powerful and dominant in this song?? i will forever stan this song. i love it SO MUCH.

spotify link: https://open.spotify.com/album/1aIXRUYjG6ORo2vGnrAk0F?si=M3auSIXlQpykpe0L_PaE7Q

3. Apricot Princess – Rex Orange County

whew??? something that isnt a musical??? damn.

but yes, i know this is very White Girl of me (i think??) but someone on my Sarahah months ago recommended him to me. it was only recently i actually thought of listening to his stuff and oh my god, i wish i hadn’t put it off as much.

i know he has other albums and eps, but i have only listened to this album so far, so im basing my opinion solely on this record. i know, sorry. i will hop onto his other stuff soon, just not yet.

his lyrics are probably my favourite thing about his music, which is unusual because the lyrics aren’t often my favourite. i always say that if you take the music away from the words, it leaves a poem or a story, but if you take the lyrics from the music, its still a song. i know that isn’t the best thing to say because i know for a fact that the lyrics of a song is sometimes essential to the mood that the artist is trying to portray with the instrumentals, and i believe that’s what rex orange county has done. it’s not often you find songs with sweet love lyrics these days (or is that me??). his way of writing is so unique and his take on love is just... wow. ive fallen in love with his lyrics. they’re so different.

favourite track: 4 seasons

oof this song is awesome because he’s talking about the story of falling in love. also??? the way the song changes all the time to something quiet and sweet to something with a lot more strings and he uses his voice more. maybe that’s to represent him falling in love? i dont know im not confident in voicing my views on the meaning of a song because i dont want to get Shanked. but yes, i love this song a lot. it’s pretty and his voice is so soothing. someone get him an asmr channel.

spotify link: https://open.spotify.com/album/2NBVxjZcbH5H1N1Ab2ExDH?si=Dk0rd5_mTfGi9UmXBgNLGg

4. Young Sinatra – Logic

whoop whoop some hip hop. logic is so underrated. i heard of him for the first time from a presentation someone made in my english class two years ago. i’ve only come across him a few times since then, but i googled frank sinatra and this mixtape came up in my recommendations.

but hey! it’s so fucking GOOD. he’s so talented?? his flow and his SPEED. i love it so much because it just gives me the biggest rush of adrenaline. i dont really know much about the technical stuff of hip hop and rap, so i might sound like a complete dumbass, but it’s such an amazing mixtape. i like his earlier stuff way better than his new stuff (please dont kill me, this is just purely my opinion). its so FAST and amazing. i love it so much!! aaaaa.

favourite track: beggin’

nothing special, i just love this song because it always gets me going in a good mood because of the beat. i love it sm!!!

youtube link: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vLB394593gU

5. Isolation – Kali Uchis

jesus HECK ive been obsessed with this album for MONTHS. i love it so much. psychedelic pop and r&b?? yes THANK YOU.

her music is so dreamy!! her voice is so soothing!!! her harmonising is the best!!! my ears are in heaven when i listen to this record. jesus JESUS JESUS. i love her aesthetic so much. her lyrics are amazing. i love her so much and i love her vintage-esque style. who let someone become so talented?? have i already mentioned that i love her so much??

also?? when she puts a little soanish here and there in her songs, its so beautiful. spanish is such a wonderful language to hear, even when you don’t understand it. it’s really something else, and it’s amazing that shes interpreting both languages in her songs, because so many bilingual or trilingual artists dont do that. it just dhows her talent in both languages!! she’s amazing, and so is this record.

favourtie track: tomorrow

i fell in love with this song the second i heard it. it has been my favourite ever since. the harmonies really just caught me off guard because its so intense. the lyrics?? beautiful. it’s like a teenage dream style song. its so youthenising. the chord sequence too?? it’s difficult to play on ukulele (im so bad at playing instruments holy heck i really tried with my tiny ass fingers) but it’s so beautiful. i wont ever stop talking about this song until the day i DIE.

spotify link: https://open.spotify.com/album/4EPQtdq6vvwxuYeQTrwDVY?si=-edz17oITuOs0LoLo1pKmQ

and that concludes my top 5 favourite albums from this month!! please take your time to listen to any of these and i hope i can write another one of these next month. im really trying to find a use for my tumblr and maybe this is it?? jesus im so lame, but im trying at least.

owo thank u

#music #recommendations #music recommendation #dear evan hansen #heathers #apricot princess #rex orange county #young sinatra #logic #isolation #kali uchis #music recommendations #tunes #bangers #bops #we goin down streaks #musicals #albums #mixtapes

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megsiplier · 7 years ago

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Okay... I know that half the fandom of jacksepticeye and markiplier are just little kids and so why are you all watching the game grumps? if it wasn't for mark and jack then you'd probably never of watched them. they are too dirty for you guys. they are an adult group. i was talking to people on twitter about how so many kids watch them and they thought i was lying because they could never imagine kids see that stuff. also pewdiepie is a racist annoying mess and jack still wont leave him.....

the number of [condescending] assumptions in this one ask is almost comical. based on… generalizations + the fact that i’m a mark/jack/etc blog that rb’d a game grumps ask prompt.. Yikes.

(1) yes, a good portion of the mark/jack fandom are young. but in this case you bet on the wrong side of the coin pal lol. i’m an adult. i’m in uni, i’ve got a full time job. reeeeally appreciate your “concern” with the “too dirty for you” comments but they’re perfectly suitable for my age group, thanks xoxo.

(i also actively listen to ninja SEX!!! party. the horror. my poor. prepubescent ears. damaged. forever. by the music... about intercourse... whatever that is.. oh no...)

(2) coming up on three years ago, a friend recommended a mark video which introduced let’s plays as a youtube genre to me, and in browsing creators i came across the grumps. that’s how i found them, and despite my blog “brand”/content, at this point i watch them almost exclusively. maybe if i hadn’t seen mark first i wouldn’t have? but even so… who the fuck cares. people find creators from other creators the same way we do with tv shows and bands.

(3) super young kids (~7-12) that find the grumps through mark/jack might not even continue watching? they’re pretty goddamn different channels even though they’re both LPs, and the games they play are also pretty goddamn different with the exceptions of new releases that both’ll try out. while i’m sure kids do “see that stuff,” highly, HIGHLY doubt the overlap of young grumps/mark&jack viewers is all that big.

(4) why do you feel the need to get on a soapbox about this… especially in a random blog’s inbox. do you have a child that’s being exposed to mature content, particularly the grumps? it is not your responsibility to parent other people, especially when you clearly have no idea how old the person you’re lecturing is

(5) i think the best part of this ask, with its high-horse attitude, is that you in all your ~adult wisdom and maturity~ are still hiding behind anon. you wanna actually be adults have a discussion about this? come on off, and i’d be happy to chat.

(6) how…. is felix relevant… to any of this… at all… esp. bc i haven’t posted about him in ages (bc of that)… and he has nothing to do with the grumps…

tl;dr? pardon my ~adult language~, but go fuck yourself.

#anon #ask meg

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livisnotlee · 4 years ago

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Definitely relate to these and I hope it’s not too late but I’ve got a few a lot of things to add, now with extra side tangents and run on sentances for only $3.99! This is gonna be a long one guys so feel free to scroll on past if you don't feel like reading an essay.

I’ve always been a bit self conscious around tickling, I didn’t know why but when I was younger every time it was mentioned I got a weird feeling in my chest and butterflies in my stomach. I didn’t know what it was at the time and whether or not it was normal so I just tried to hide it and move on. I’ve gotten better at understanding and accepting this side of myself, but even now when it comes up I have to try and hide my blush and play it cool; like sir how can you just bring it up so casually? how are you not shitting your pants right now??

I’m really self conscious about getting tickled in public cause I’m scared that I might get judged for it and that people might think less of me for liking it or reacting weirdly

I don't mind my laugh that much but again I’m scared that it’s weird enough to draw attention and get a few weird looks.

I also don’t want to bother/ annoy the people around me by making a scene, especially one that I can’t control.

I worry that I’m not ticklish enough and that my ler will stop if they don’t get the right reactions, like I’ve found that sometimes I’m really sensitive and sometimes not at all which throws me for a loop.

Im worried that I wont lke it as much as I thought I would, like an insanely annoying itch that I can't stand

I don't think I really want my family to know, they are the people i'm going to be stuck with for the rest of my life, even when im not living with them anymore I still want to see them and love them lots, so I dont want them to think any less of me because of my liking for tickling. Therefore I also feel self concious about them tickling me, fun! I guess I’ll either have to work up the courage to tell my friends, who are extremely supportive which is nice, or wait until I get a new partner and tell them, which is fine I’m just a little impatient haha. Although It's not like I've keept this a perfect secret all my life as you see with the next points.

I’m pretty sure my mum saw a bit of my search history from back when I was searching up tickling on YouTube, I think she talked to me about it although I can’t remember what was said but I can remember thinking ‘oh this is obviously pretty weird and I’ve done something wrong, ✨repression time (TM)✨’

I think my sister also knew because of the tickling games that I used to play on roblox, and since you can look at what your friends are playing she would have definitely found out at some point no matter how much I cleared my history. I think at one point I was sitting in the bathroom for a while and she yelled from the other side of the door something like ‘get of those weird games I need to get in there!’ And to top it all of I remember role playing together with our toys some kind of tickle bug scenario, and she just went along with it?? Looking back on all the weird stuff that I did as a kid she definitely would have known, I’m hoping that she’s just forgotten about that stuff now but yikes.

And that’s about it! If I think of anything else I’ll update this. But yeah I’m a big ball of insecurities, which is ok cause I’m slowly working through them; and if that means spilling my guts out onto a post that will be read by people on the internet than that’s ok I guess. I’ve met so many cool people through this community and have learned to love this part of myself even if I haven’t shown it to many people irl, so thanks so much to all of you! You all mean so much to me even if we don’t talk that much.

I have question. If you're comfy, reblog with your insecurities/fears surrounding tiggles. I'm just curious to see what we may all be concerened about if that makes any sense. You can hide them in the tags for privacy :).

#whats up with the spacing in these dotpoints?#mini rant #twords #tickles #tword #tword vent #vent post #tword community #tickle community #tickling #sfw tickles #sfw tickling #sfw tickling community

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taejimin · 7 years ago

Text

92 statements tag

Rules: you must answer these 92 statements and tag 20 people

tagged by: @gay-jk cuz shes gay

The Last:

1. Drink - water

2. Phone call - i dont have a phone rip i facetimed my sister the other day tho that went greaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaat :))) /sarcasm

3. Text message - my friend kirbey

4. Song you listened to - back to you by louis tomlinson

5. Time you cried - mmm my last mental breakdown whenever that was. maybe like two weeks ago.

Have You Ever:

6. Dated someone twice - nope

7. Kissed someone and regretted it - mmm not really no

8. Been cheated on - nope

9. Lost someone special - nope

10. Been depressed - 24/7 ladiessss eyyyy

11. Gotten drunk and thrown up - nope!!!! tho maybe i just havent reached that level of drunk yet in my life

List 3 Favorite Colors:

12-14. purple, pink, blue

In The Last Year Have You:

15. Made new friends - mhm!

16. Fallen out of love - yikes yep

17. Laughed until you cried - mhm

18. Found out someone was talking about you - lmao if randoms vagueing me on tumblr counts

19. Met someone who changed you - yea

20. Found out who your friends are - i found out who my friend arent lmao

21. Kissed someone on your facebook list - yep

General:

22. How many of your facebook friends do you know in real life: all of em but maybe three or four?

23. Do you have any pets: my lil girl bukie

24. Do you want to change your name: my last name yes always

25. What did you do for your last birthday: nothing lmao i got takeout and sat in my room

26. What time did you wake up: about 7 or 8?

27. What were you doing at midnight last night: trying to fall asleep

28. Name something you can’t wait for: bts’ next album?

29. When was the last time you saw your mom: like three seconds ago

30. What is one thing you wish you could change in your life: to be happy? lmao

31. What are you listening to right now: the fan going whrrrrrr next to me

32. Have you ever talked to a person named Tom: i cant say that i have

33. Something that is getting on your nerves: how motherfcking hot it is

34. Most visited website: tumblr or youtube

38. Hair color: dark dark brown

39. Long or short hair: short-ish? like barely shoulder length

40. Do you have a crush on someone: sighhhhhh

41. What do you like about yourself: i like that i’m gay (this was claire’s answer but im keeping it bc mood)

42. Piercings: just the normal ear piercing set everyone gets when theyre 11

43. Blood type: ???

44. Nickname: jess technically. jessy via my family. jennifer and jenniglet via @knjz and @gaytae. @jiminn-thighs calls me rae of sunshine lmao. (rae is my middle name. pun.)

45. Relationship status: eye emoji, shrug girl emoji

46. Zodiac: virgo. idk what my moon is bc my mom wont tell me what time i was born bc she doesnt love me

47. Pronouns: she/her

48. Favorite tv show: it’s always sunny in philadelphia

49. Tattoos: none but i want some :/

50. Right or left handed: left

51. Surgery: none

52. Piercings: already answered this lmao

53. Sport: the only good sports are volleyball and tennis bc i cant watch girls be talented bc im gay

55. Vacation: bitch i wish

56. Pairs on trainers: of? trainers? thats shoes right. like one. lmao.

More General:

57. Eating - these arent questions how do i interpret these statements. i had a peanut butter sandwich and pretzels this morning?

58. Drinking - water

59. I’m about to - fucking die from this fucking god damn heat

61. Waiting for - bts’ next album

62. Want - bts’ next album

63. Get married - id like to bitch tf

64. Career - gay housewife

65. Hugs or kisses - both :/

66. Lips or eyes - depends?

67. Shorter or taller - TALLER

68. Older or younger - older

70. Nice arms or nice stomach - i love tummies :/

71. Sensitive or loud - is this describing me? bc yes

72. Troublemaker or hesitant - troublemaker on the internet hesitant in the...real life?

Have you ever:

74. Kissed a stranger: technically?

75. Drank hard liquor: yep

76. Lost glasses/contact lenses: nope!

77. Turned someone down: uhhh i told this fuck boi i wasnt gonna give him head bc he disgusted me does that count? (i wouldnt have done that even if i hadnt been disgusted tho i just wanna make that clear)

78. Sex on the first date: i have to fall in love w/someone first what kinda lesbian do i look like

79. Broken someone’s heart: i hope not

80. Had your heart broken: yikes

81. Been arrested: nope

82. Cried when someone died: yep

83. Fallen for a friend: drag me why dont u

Do You Believe In:

84. Yourself: i believe that im gay

85. Miracles: maybe?

86. Love at first sight: also maybe?

87. Santa claus: santa claus is a gay icon

88. Kiss on the first date: mhm

89. Angels: park jimin exists so yea

Other:

90. Current best friend’s name: i have more than one irl its my kirbey on the internets its @gaytae and @gay-jk and @knjz

91. Eye color: brown

92. Favorite movie: captain america the winter soldier, all three star trek reboot movies, the original winnie the pooh movie, lilo and stitch

im supposed to tag some people i suppose but i dont even think i know 20 people here sooooooo @knjz @jiminn-thighs @gaytae @lesbianblossomjimin

#mine: text #clarence said im her best friend here aw :')#time for me and candy to fight to death for the number one spot #also that was cute #about me #pri ive almost typed ur url @gaypri like six times #tho...tru

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