#also it will add a shit ton of romance to this entire story

[amyisherenowitsokay]

Not sure if this was asked before, but when you write, do you have a clear vision of what you want from beginning to end or does it come to you along the way?

Also how do you get so detailed with your writing? Is there a trick to it?

Don't worry about repeating asks! Usually people word their questions enough for me to be able to give different answers, and if not, I'll just elaborate on what I've said before.

In regards to your first question, it depends on the fic, honestly. The Re:MHNY requires waaay more planning because of what I'm trying to do with the story, my intentional parallels, etc. For that series, I basically have a google doc entirely dedicated to just bullet points and a synopsis of the plot, important themes, character, etc. Just a big ol' digital plotting board. Along the way I'll also sporadically write chapters at random as the ideas come to me, or even write just a few sentences that illustrate a point I want to make before I forget the wording. The amount of Notes on my phone that are just fic drabbles is absurd.

For other fics like Dead Weight, That Thing on Your Wrist, etc., the idea just sort of occurs to me. Like for That Thing On Your Wrist, I really was sulking about not being able to find more ZAGR fics that follow a trope. Invader Zim is really sci-fi, adventure-packed, humor-oriented cartoon, and so I think it's really easy for the fans such as myself to write themselves exclusively in these little pockets we've carved out for ourselves. And don't get me wrong, I obviously love writing as close to the canon as I can get, but also, what about my beloved cliches? And so that idea becomes infectious, and I start picking out the details in my brain. There's a million little Soulmate AU's (seeing color when you touch, hearing each other's thoughts when you touch, hearing each other across distances, etc.), rifled through the cards, and picked one I felt was easiest for me to do while keeping the characters how I wanted them, with appropriate amounts of drama.

It just itches at my brain until I start to add little practicalities to the situation. For Dead Weight, I want them as Irkens, but also it has to be a romance story. And it still needs to be in-character. So ZAGR, but with the added brutality of child soldiers and uniquely Irken-trauma. What does that look like? And that's usually how random entire chapters get formed in answering that question. What's Irken courtship look like? What do sibling-adjacent-relationships look like? What circumstances would make that possible?

I'm infamous for also just writing 6k words that I know go in a fic, but have no idea when. So I'll just sit on this chapter I love for like a year until I'm like aha! You'll fit here! And then make adjustments to make all the pieces fit together. Unfortunately, as the story develops, that does mean sometimes jokes or ideas I wrote in a random draft have to be edited or removed to fit in the circumstances I made. Re:MHNY1 has tons of deleted chunks that were funny or that I liked, but that didn't end up working in-context.

So short answer, I find an idea I want to write, and then just keep hammering away until that idea feels like I can make it make sense, and then keep adding bricks that justify it, if that makes sense. My fics are me standing in front of an enormous cork board with red string, thumbtacks, and fanart everywhere explaining why ZAGR makes sense in this circumstances. In this essay I will etc. etc.

In regards to detail, my goal in my writing is to ground the fantastical. What does an alien ship feel like? Cold, cause void of space, right? Well no, because organic creatures like bees pass out in the cold, so they'd need warmth. But this is a run-down piece of shit ship, so they'd probably keep their inhabited areas warm, and leave other areas cold, like Gaz's cell on the Valkian ship. I also catch myself making gestures or miming out certain scenes. If I smirk, how does that muscle twitch feel on my face? Or if I try to suppress a smile, I catch myself gritting my teeth a little, and so I add that into the description. Just because a circumstance is made up doesn't mean you don't have sights, smells, feelings, or other senses that affect how a character perceives the situation.

Like in The Corn Maze in Paradorx, I've personally never been chased by a corn demon, but I do know what freaks me out. Everyone is careful when they're outside at night, because they're worried of who else is out there with them, among other things. That's a real, legitimate fear that pretty much everyone can relate to. And so I write in scenes of the corn leaning towards them listening to them when they're not paying attention, and the nasty odor of rotting pumpkins because people remember that smell. I think my most successful details aren't describe every individual piece of wood grain, but picking out aspects of a situation that the everyman reader knows and can remember. Those are the details that are most effective, that people tend to comment on as what gave them, in this case, the heebie jeebies.

Also, I like to find punchier words. It's not a smell, it's a stench. It doesn't hurt, it aches. The English language has some wonderfully specific words that I think are wonderfully appropriate to really specific situations, and I discover them by being an avid reader of novels in general.

Sorry again for the crazy wait regarding answering this ask! Hope I answered your questions anon! If I missed anything, or you'd like me to elaborate anywhere, let me know and I'll do my best to answer in a much more timely fashion.

[terraco-07]

I'm gonna start this off by being self aware. Vriscourse in 2024 is so funny and kind of silly in a way so take as little or as much of this as you want. I think I should lead in with Vriska is divisive on purpose. Her entire story is rife with places where you can either hate her, love her, or find shades of grey. I love Vriska as a character, but I want to be perfectly clear. Vriska Serket is NOT a good person, but imo very few people are. Narratively speaking Vriska grows up on a hostile planet where she's forced to kill for her Lusus. She also has the influence of Mindfang's journal to contend with. Vriska never knows who she is, she's always living in someone else's shadow and constantly hating it. Yet at the same time she's trying to live her life by some grand formula. Let's take Tavros for example. By virtue of Karkat and the descriptions we get of Alternia we see the word pity used several times when describing Flushed feelings. Can we take it with a grain of salt and assume that Karkat a known romance over enjoyer is being an unreliable narrator? Sure, we can. That said I think that wording is relevant here. In Vriska's head she feels bad for this guy and thinks that she's the only one who can fix him. On top of that you add in that her hero was flush with a powerful bronzeblood and you've put massive blinders on yourself. She becomes so self absorbed with this idea that she ends up going way too far in her efforts to bring him around and pushes heavily past his consent and boundaries. (Looking at that kiss scene). Even after his death she says maybe 2-3 things about ahh man maybe I shouldn't say bad things about that guy anymore or am I bad for killing (another) friend. She's young but I think the lack of remorse is something that matters here when looking at her in adulthood which is what we're really trying to get to here. As for the previous murder it's barely even touched. There's an air of well Aradia killed me back so we're all good. Even though she ascended to God tier and initially Aradia was just a ghost who had to deal with it while Sollux had to cope with the fact that physically it was his body that killed his matesprit. General other beats are the arrogance, easy to anger, and lack of empathy. Which we actually get to see some development on those from pre retcon Vriska! More on that here in a second.

Holy shit Gil, you're rambling so God Damn much why do we care? I don't know, don't ask me, but here's why all that foundation matters. If we're thinking about the theoretical for any Homestuck character as a whole I feel like we have to consider who they are in adulthood. Tons of discussion and debate all circles around "well they were kids!" Okay, well lets talk about what they could be as adults. So with everything we've already brought up about Vriska, how does she act in her 20s? Personally I think she struggles post game. She has no mental purpose for a while and she's in a place where she doesn't have to fight just to live so that means tons of time to sit around and think. We've seen from pre retcon Vriska that when the stress is off she does actually consider what she's done to a degree. Do I think she thinks about Tavros or Alternian sins all that much? No. I think she doesn't like her younger self (like most people) and does what she can to avoid being like that anymore. That comes with painfully slow growth and still a lot of bridges in need of mending. Those same traits of being self centered and needing attention are there but they're a little more tempered. She can at least listen now and has the emotional intelligence to realize when she's hurt someone and actually care about that. In summary: Vriska is a complicated and flawed character and saying that she did nothing wrong but also saying she did everything wrong are both incorrect. There is nothing defensible about her acts (She fucked up bad) but we can understand why she may have done them without condoning them. As an adult she is still kind of an asshole but she's not to that same level and she gets to grow into a somewhat reasonable adult that is still a dick at times. Also if you got this far then enjoy my shameless Vrisrose propaganda. They get in fights all the time and want to beat the shit out of each other nonstop. Both of them suck and it's so funny.

[cru5h-cascades]

So some time ago I was scrolling through Netflix, desperate to find something interesting to watch. While surfing through the service, I stumbled upon a strangely familiar show that I never watched. Maya and the Three. Looking at the thumbnail pic and such, the artstyle in the show reminded me of the Book of Life, a movie I loved as a kid (and still love!). I looked it up and turned out the show was made by the same folks who made the Book of Life! I knew my lil' bro would probably like this so I got him into the room and we started watching the series. During the week it took for us to get through the entire series (which was a season long btw; not because Netflix canceled it, but because the creater of the show was scared it would be canceled prior to the story's conclusion), we saw the story unfold. Incredible fight scenes, great characters, and an ending that made me cry lmao the show was that good. However, towards the end of the show some things felt a bit rushed like the romance plotpoint between Maya and possible tumblr sexyman 2024 canidate, Zatz, and Maya opening up more to her biological mother, the goddess of death. Also I felt like the realm of the gods and the gods themselves weren't explored that much, either. Which is why I decided "Hey, what if I re-imagined the series? This show only had a season anyways. It had so much potential!". And here we are now. My basic idea for a re-imagining of Maya and the Three! I might keep building upon the idea of the re-imagining in the future but I've got a shit ton of projects I wanna get out there (I gotta finish Your Side of Order, start Calamity Circus now that I got an idea of how the story will go, and brainstorm the story I had in mind for Ribbon & W.D) and because this is just a rough idea as I only thought about all of. Anyways here we go :D

Heart of a God (a re-imagining of Maya and the Three)

What I had in mind was this: Lord Michlan (now the king of all gods and the god of war in this re-imagining) has a rule about god/human hybrids: they're either taken to the realm of the gods at birth by the god that spawned them or they're seperated from their mortal family at the age of 15 and sent to the realm of the gods against their will. Either way, if they aren't sent to do something for the gods, they're stuck in the realm of the gods for all eternity.

The re-imagining starts the same way the first episode of the series does: Maya's being officially recognized as a princess and has to give up the rough and tough lifestyle she loves. But two things are different: A) Maya's brothers aren't there because to me personally they don't add much to the plot and B) the reveal of Maya's demigod-hood. Zatz crashes the party, reveals Maya's demigod-hood to the people of Teca, and goes on to tell everyone that he has to take Maya to the realm of the gods ('cause you know, the rule about demigods). However, he seems very unwilling to do this. He has a somber tone to his voice. Anyways, at first, Maya's parents are outraged and want to fight back, however, Maya turns herself in, still mad about having to give up her lifestyle. Her parents are mildly confused and shocked, only for Maya to justify that "isn't this what princesses are supposed to do? protect her people? if I can't fight I might as well do this instead, even if I don't want to. heck, maybe my birth mom is better than you two.". Maya's very clearly pissed off about all of this. She doesn't want to deal with any of this, so she heads to Zatz and the two start going to the realm of the gods. Maya's parents are heartbroken, but don't react with violence as they first indended... at least not right now.

After the first episode, we get to know more about the realm of the gods, the gods themselves, and see Maya grow as a character. At first, Maya isn't optimistic about this new life she has to live, being trapped in a world full of strange beings that have the ability to kill her in a heartbeat, but at the same time she doesn't want to go back to the life she knew ('cause she's still pissed off about the lifestyle thing and being lied to). And it doesn't help that, by order of Lord Michlan, Zatz has to accompany her throughout the realm of the gods until she's fully adjusted to this new way of life and as the story progresses, the two get closer (fixing the unaturally quick pacing of the romance plotpoint in the OG show) and we get to know why Zatz is the way he is (might elaborate further in a seperate post idk). Also, the goddess of death tries to find a way to let Maya be with her mortal parents again.

We don't spend all the series in the realm of the gods though because after a while, Maya's parents get desperate and decide to wage war against the gods and assemble an army and force our three other main characters from the OG series (Pichu, Chimi, and Rico) into this ordeal (since they're the chosen ones), sending them into the realm of the gods (again 'cause they're the chosen ones) to try to retrive Maya, with each one of them having their own emotional baggage (I liked their backstories from the OG show 'cause they were pretty solid so I'm keeping them) alongside the fact that they didn't want this. Each epsiode focusing on the chosen ones' missions will involve each of them wanting to kill the gods (especially Zatz 'cause he has to stay w/ Maya) and Maya & Zatz fighting them to get them to stop (and also help them with their emotional baggage or whateva). All of this will lead up to the finale where the mortals shatter the barrier between their realm and the realm of the gods and start the mortal v gods war, with the mortals' ultimate goal being to kill the gods (and demigods, specifically Zatz because this guy was the one who took Maya away from the rulers of Teca). Outraged by this, Michlan makes the strongest of the gods go to the mortal realm to punish the mortals, still not realizing that his rule is pretty fucked up. As the fight rages on, Zatz, Maya, and the chosen ones become determined to stop the war, with seemingly the only way of stopping it is killing Michlan since he is just so determined to keep his demigod rule in place.

Instead of killing off almost all of the best characters like in the OG series (bro why couldn't Maya just have her happy ending? I mean sure becoming the sun is pretty cool but seems kinda weak at least to me. what can you even do as a big fucking ball of gas??), here's what I had in mind:

Maya loses her arm fighting Lord Michlan (bringing the dislocation thing full circle; it kinda did in the main series but it would've been more badass than limping towards Michlan's heart thing or whateva)

Zatz and the goddess of death die, but because technically this show and the Book of Life happen in the same universe, La Muerte shows up after the battle with Candle Maker and Xibalba to intervene because all the gods are dead, and to reward Maya for her efforts she revives Zatz, however the goddess of death can't be revived because she is a god.

The turning into the sun and moon thing is ditched entirely.

And finally Maya reconciles with her parents about the events of the first episode.

And that's the basics of the re-imagining. I'll probably do more posts about this in the future since this is a pretty rough concept for a Maya re-imagining and this might need some polishing up so be on the look out for more of those ;D

[rockybloo]

i like the way you draw zeke's gashes and gore, do you like horror/have horror recs (any media)

As much as I like to draw mushy wholesome romance between two characters...I love horror to an almost unhealthy extent. It is my favorite genre of anything honestly (I have spent days binge watching horror films back to back to back on Netflix, even the bad ones)

I've never really done a recommendation list before for anything so I can only list my favorites that I could spend a day rewatching no problem. I also need to add that I am a gore hound and the gorier the film or series is, the higher my chances of enjoyment so please keep this in mind.

My FAVORITE horror films are:

Brain Dead/ Dead Alive: I need to state that this film basically has EVERY trigger in it and did not age well AT ALL in terms of some of the jokes. However, having watched it when I was young, it was a crucial part of me becoming a horror fan and I love this trainwreck dearly...for its special effects. Mainly just the special effects. I do appreciate how the film is kinda split in two. The first being funny zombie comedy stuff and the last half being...well a shit ton of blood and gore. Also it has stop motion in it at some points which I love as someone who also adores stop motion.

The Final Destination Franchise: Not recommended for the paranoid but I love this 2000s ass film franchise. The premise is creative as well as the deaths. I also love that Death is super petty in this series and refuses to just kill someone up front and instead chooses the Rube Goldberg approach to offing people. Plus the original voice actor for Kratos pops up in one of the films which is a bonus if you are a God of War fan like me. If I had to pick a favorite out of the franchise, I'd say it's a tie between the first and the last. HOWEVER, the last film is oh so more rewarding if you watched the entire franchise-I will not spoil why but just trust me.

Candyman: The original film specifically. It's so interesting how the antagonist is a living myth and is so poetic in his words that sometimes I kinda forgot he was the villain. I love his design and the fact this film deeply touches on certain issues and not just being focused on being a typical slasher.

The Haunted Mansion: Yes the...original Disney live action film with Eddie Murphy. I count it as a horror film because it was genuinely scary to me as a kid. There's still some horrific stuff in it now. I mean, you got the opening credit scenes leading up to a dude straight up hanging himself, the zombies looking like straight up corpses, A DUDE GETTING DRAGGED TO HELL. The music still haunts me to this day.

Nope: A recent addition but this is def one of the best horror films I've seen. It is filled to the brim with so many details that you don't catch on the first watch. Plus, the "spaceship" is such a well designed element that I still think about how it works and how smart of a concept it was. I love the protagonists in this film as well and the bit of humor sprinkled in. I actually enjoyed this film so much I read the script for it since it was online (which I've never done for any film before). Cannot recommend this film enough.

Us: This film is just a level or horror that I only feel when reading Junji Ito stories. The idea of a doppelganger never scared me until this film because the entire concept is your other self hunting you down to kill you. There's a murder spree scene in this film that is so well framed and done because you see both everything and nothing at the same time because of the camera angle. The Tethered are underrated as monsters.

The Thing: The old one with the husky dog. The original Among Us and the best "WHO THE FUCK IS THE KILLER" film. The special effects are amazing and the fact that the audience cannot tell who the alien is is so great because we feel just as scared as the crew members. Plus...the alien absorbing people is just straight horrific.

This list is getting long and I have so many horror films I got jingling around in my brain but my last one is Pet Semetary. I was gonna put Poltergeist, which is also a favorite and is the only paranormal film I enjoy (I am not a big fan of ghost movies but that's because I love gore and carnage), but I kinda...don't really see it as a horror film. It certainly is one but there's so many cute and funny moments and it's kinda more whimsical than scary to me.

ANYWAYS BACK TO PET SEMETARY-There's an unsettlingness to it that I can't really explain. It's not just the dead pet aspect, it's just the vibes in it. The happy music becoming twisted as well as the always foreboding mood where you know something bad is gonna happen. There's a couple things that are left up to the audience's imagination but there's enough context that you just KNOW something terrible happened (like that ending). Plus, the little kid actor going on a killing spree is...kinda funny. He's just a little fella with a knife having a good ole time before bedtime.

ANYWAYS-I'VE RAMBLED ENOUGH ABOUT HORROR FILMS!

[revvethasmythh]

Tary and/or Scanlan for the ask meme. To cover all our bases with Sam PCs, haha

I was wondering if I was going to be able to cover all of Sam's PCs with this lmao! Seeing as I do have a reputation to uphold re: sam's PCs, I will do them both

Tary:

First impression

Baby. Beloved. Pompous jackass whomst I love the most. True love at first sight and I am not kidding

Impression now

Baby. beloved. Pathetic pompous jackass I adore (I never stopped loving him, I have only grown to love him more)

Favorite moment

It is hard to choose between ALL of his bits in Jugs and Rods or the Grog and Tary shopping adventure in Vasselheim. Critical Role has TONS of funny moments and there is stuff in every campaign that has really gotten to me--but nothing like this. My abs ached the next day, I was fully weeping real fucking tears over this. I am laughing just thinking about it as I am typing. Fucking iconic.

Idea for a story

I have never considered a story with Tary specifically, but you know I'd love a story that explored Tary getting back together with Lawrence and how that aspect of their love story played out! I feel like that could be a very fun romance piece.

Unpopular opinion

Genuinely an incredible character, not as a joke, not for the bit. I mean, Tary is hilarious, yes. But I don't think Sam gets enough credit for how GOOD Tary was beyond the bit. He's a top tier character and deserves more credit from the fandom for it.

Favorite relationship

I'll split this one with Percy and Vex. Tary ends up being such good friends with both of them and his friendship with Vex is something I find particularly endearing (another Sam + Laura dynamic coming through golden) and then you add the layer of Tary's close friendship and unrequited pining for Percy into the mix....that whole dynamic of the three of them is great.

Favorite headcanon

I should really just delete this question because I never have headcanons to add. Idk. I don't really do head canons.

Scanlan:

First impression

Thought he was kind of gross and too sexually forward, ngl

Impression now

Probably my favorite of Vox Machina, not counting Tary. I don't know, he really grew on me. I think Scanlan circles around similar themes that all of Sam's PCs do, which is why I tend to gravitate toward them, you know? The eternal struggle of wanting to appear okay for your friends because you can't or won't invite the vulnerability of being honest about how you're struggling, only to hit a breaking point and lose it because no one has noticed your pain (because you have hidden it)? All the inherent complications and contradictions of that sort of thinking? Feels very realistic and relatable, for me, at least.

Favorite moment

It's so easy to choose The Bard's Lament for this. WHAT an incredible dramatic character move. Unparalleled, dramatic, complex, and it added so much to Scanlan's character and the dynamic with the group, forcing VM to sit with some things (and to get angry at him! Because he was unfair too!). I loved that shit, I ate it up.

But also, Scanlan's return to VM and trying to Modify Memory on Vex only to whiff it and her just hugging him. I fucking love that, too.

Idea for a story

You know, the thing is, this question is tickling some kind of memory of mine that I had actually planned to write something about Scanlan/Pikelan and I just cannot remember what on earth it was going to be. I can't even think of anything else, I'm just annoyed I can't remember what I was going to do, now

Unpopular opinion

I don't think Scanlan blowing up at VM and saying unfair things to them makes him a bad person or selfish or [insert whatever other thing here]. I think he was unwell, and had some valid reasons to be upset, and spoke in anger in a very human moment wherein neither party was entirely wrong or right. People apply judgement to that scene a lot, I think because it's very emotionally jarring, it's aggressive and unexpected and it prompts strong feeling because of that, but I don't think there's any judgment to be applied. VM was wrong about some things, Scanlan was wrong about some things. A big bundle of tragically human conflict, honestly, which is why it's fantastic.

Favorite relationship

Probably Grog. I love that whole corner of VM (Grog and his gnomes) and all their dynamics, but you can really feel such a camaraderie and care between these two that I love. Also Vex (that Sam + Laura dynamic always hits, I suppose)

[bells-of-black-sunday]

🔥

Unpopular Opinions | Accepting

This one is genuinely unpopular but: B.aulders G.ate 3 didn't deserve nearly the amount of awards it got at the v.ideo g.ame awards and while it is a good game it is still one of the most over hyped games I've played to date. Let me explain.

I'm not saying it's a bad game, it's gorgeous, the va work is incredible, the story is fun until you hit act 3, tons of content, and a lot of replay-ability, but my god most of this stuff came in patches after it's release. The entirety of the third act is extremely rushed to the point where you only have 1 actual boss fight in the entire game out of the 3 big bads they set up. G.ortash and O.rin got fucking shafted in terms of story and game play and are barely used even when they should be esp if you're running a d.urge character. You actively get insanely punished for playing an evil tav it's extremely stupid and only now over a year after it's release did we even get evil endings.

Why wasn't that on launch? This game took so long in development, because the devs were too focused on adding way too much to the game instead of focusing on making sure it was actually complete on launch. They self admit the third act is very rushed, so why not have actually put in the fucking time to finish your story properly instead of talking about adding multiplayer sex scenes??? That's not even mentioning how W.hyll still doesn't have a majority of what other romance paths have, because god forbid we give one of the black camp members anything.

Oh and it took them what? 6 months? To add anything to after you play the game to actually tie up the plot threads they laid out and give a stratifying conclusion to the relationships you built. That's not even counting how d.urge is barely a story line and probably should've stayed a recruit-able npc or something if they weren't going to put effort into it until a year later. I'm so tired of games being expensive as all hell, but not being complete on release. It's so fucking stupid that you're paying 60 or 70 dollars for a game that isn't complete until a year after it's released.

The game has so many flaws that really could've been solved with how long it was in development, e and my friends joked for actual years it was never coming out, because L.arian kept talking about adding more and more and well we see how that turned out. Also speaking as someone who plays d.nd, 5e combat is so fucking boing holy shit, the combat in the game is a slog because of that, they should've stuck to D.ivinity's token based combat system. Funnily enough D.ivinty gives you more freedom in combat than the d.nd game.

I'm going to be real after watching someone play A.lan W.ake 2, the only other game to win anything and b.g3 fans still bitched, I'm genuinely pissed it didn't win more awards, that's an actual complete game with an incredible story and incredible full album soundtrack that also has a full 30 min musical section and a 20 minute short film in it that you can watch. Not counting the multiple commercials and bits that you can watch on the tv that is all live action. How the fuck didn't it win? The combat is really smooth and the boss fights are fun, there's genuine tense moments and really emotional ones.

It treats it's audience with the maturity they respect, since it's been so long since the first game. It's so campy and fun, not a perfect game by any means, the pc port for example is really stupid, but you expect that with R.emedy. There's kind of forced replay-ability in it, because new game plus gives you story that ties up more of the loose ends, I think so of the pacing towards the end should've been cleaned up i.e actually sprinkling answers throughout instead of giving them all at the end.

I genuinely think A.lan's VA should've won of A.starion's, the line delivery and ability to play multiple characters and you not really notice is incredible. The Mr. S.cratch sections in the tv like in I forget which dlc from the first game where it's A.lan's dark thoughts that are the monster are honestly extremely haunting. Genuinely to go from the first game to how he is here, my god what range and improvement. You've still got the "this is really a metaphor for depression and anxiety and every dark part of you" stuff going on, but it's not shoved down your throat.

I think incorporating live action into the game was a brilliant choice to add to the uncanny nature of literally everything. Genuinely it's such an incredible game that while flawed, deserved way more recognition than it got. Yet when it came out it got massively over shadowed, because everyone in B.g3 is hot or something, so that means it's better.

I'm not saying I didn't enjoy my time with B.g3, I did, it's a fun game. I get people replaying it, but aside form character dialogue that you can look up to see what changes and the new added endings, there's not much to it's story. It's a really basic d.nd campaign with a lot of fluff and a rushed third act for literally no reason after you build up hype about how strong and powerful the d.ead threes chosen are meanwhile they never reach the stakes or height of K.ethric's boss battle that is insanely early into the game.

[celinolesunshine]

Hi hello i stalked thru your mermay chapters and other writing stuff for the celestial jesters and i

HOW and wHere do you get their characterizations from pls its literslly so good it was so fun reading ur works here i am so in love head in hands

AH!!!! Thank you so much ;/////;

So, I'm super new to the FNAF fandom. Like, got into it because Security Breach came out. I knew people who've played it before and all that good jazz, but I know almost none of the official lore beyond all of the Vanny stuff.

Given that, Sun and Moon have been my FAVORITES (i've done some research) of all of the characters so far. I read a LOT. I read.. way too much fanfiction.

In order to essentially create my characterizations for Sun/Moon, I consume a shit-ton of media about them. Read fanfictions, look at art, cosplays, designs- and I slowly start to build them from the ground up.

I adapt headcanons from many different places and assume them for my versions of Sun and Moon. Sun's manner of speaking is actually pretty parallel to a fic that I read once. If I could remember the name, I would read it again, but I just remember being so struck by the happy 'child-speak' manner that this author gave Sun, so I decided to use it.

Lots of people tend to see Moon as a character being kind of sadistic and hurtful, and while that's its own breed, I don't tend to see him that way?? I've always imagined him pre-glitch to be very caring, and sweet, and non-provocative. The fact that he speaks like he does is simply out of how Moon acting like an absolute gentleman makes my heart do loops.

I've also been off-handedly writing for years and years, and so being a complete bookworm, I love writing descriptively, and for Sun and Moon to be so polarized in their mannerisms really makes it fun to attempt to develop characteristics to them that make them unique as people.

A lot of off-handed inspiration comes just from, like I said, pieces of media, such as @8um8ble8ee 's Sun/Moon art (GOD the Sun in a t-shirt pics I die for) and @sunshineistyping 's writing pieces (curse your stripper AU, Sunshine, curse it all to hell). Fleshing out things like designs was harder, especially given that some people have really solid designs and mannerisms for their Suns and Moons that give me complete envy and want to re-do my entire personas for them (I'm looking at you, @hunny-bxscuit and @shandzii and @pixelchills).

From there, it's a matter of making their personas kind of A), fit with my plotline(s), and B), fleshing out what I would like to see in them (Moon speaking in a very sophisticated, calculated manner).

For my Mermay AU, Once At Sea, I had the thought of Sunny being blind for absolutely no reason, I just thought that it would be an interesting little twist to add, especially with the potential co-dependency on Moon factor. A lot of that AU I did on the fly, since I heard @Bamsara was making a Mermay fanfic too. Many, MANY parts, however, were inspired by my favorite romance trilogy, called Undertow By Michael Buckley. It's also about a girl (mine's GN!, though) from a seaside town and it involves mer-people, though sort of unconventionally... Trust me, it's a really good read.

Me and Bam's first chapters came out within DAYS of each other, and so much of our stories were similar even though I only JUST got around to reading Celestial Omens, which is absolutely insane. We both have old men figures (Gramps and Mr. Agupta), we both have legends or 'omens' surrounding our fish boys (the Sunfish legend and the 'omens' tale by Gramps), at least one of our fish boys ends up captured in a net (in my case, it's Moon in a boat, but for Bam it was both on the beach), and BOTH of our reader inserts live on a seaside town WITH A HOUSE OVERLOOKING THE BEACH. I was so surprised because I legitimately had no way of copying them, AHAHAHA-

But overall, it's really a matter of figuring out what you'd like to see in your characters, having the drive and the means to see it through, and a bit of a crafty hand if you're taking a crack at drawing or writing about them.

Thanks for the ask, sunshine!! Have a wonderful rest of the day.

TL;DR: I consumed a bunch of different types of media in order to figure out what I wanted for my versions of Sun/Moon. Overall, it's a mix of finding what you want and figuring out what out of the community you want to combine to make the ultimate Sun or Moon!

[vibesaresimplyatrocious]

Dude your tags on that writing post are making me go wild because oh my gosh your fic does read like someone committing to the bit!! Like in the nicest possible way it does read like improv every plot point feels like a “yes and” moment and it’s AMAZING (also it’s great to know that the character assassination of Johnny Storm was not premeditated lmao)

oh yeah pretty much everything in it is just a "yes and" moment where I did something earlier and I decide to play off of it more. Like, especially in chewing coffee.

i decided to commit to chewing coffee because I had like. one specific scene with the avengers i wanted to write, and i needed a way to fucking get there. So i decided I'd just start with dealing with the narrative consequences of the last fic and I would get to the avengers when I figured out how to get peter's character emotionally to the place he needed to be for that bit. it's been three hundred pages, by the way. and we still have some decent ground to cover.

I like talking about writing and stories, so there's a huge fuckign data dump below the cut about how the improv developed and the johnny storm thing. don't feel obligated to read it, it's a lot.

One of my big pet peeves in stuff that has romance, especially when there's a "woman" character (since the omegaverse basically just always has a guy taking the "female" role in the relationship) is when that character's like. entire life becomes their love interest. Like nah. They have to have other shit going on. you gotta let them do their own things. having feelings for this person doesn't mean you don't have other shit in your life.

My other big pet peeve is when people do things for drama and then don't follow through with the logical consequences of that.

Which is one of the reasons why Matt's the love interest and has hardly been in the fic. peter's got his own shit going on. The biggest consequence of hand-spun silk wasn't them getting feelings for each other--that's manageable, even if they're going to be huge fucking dumbasses about it. It was the bridge. at the time, I decided i needed a big climax action scene thing to sort of make a transition moment in the narrative that would push matt and peter to commit fully to what they were doing. but the logical consequence of that is "wow the public got a HUGE FUCKING CLUE as to who this mystery omega is."

of course, i was never going to write chewing coffee, so i thought i was never going to deal with it. then, i wrote chewing coffee. so i had to deal with it.

so Peter's got bigger shit going on, and he's got a very full life outside of matt. Matt stilll adds to his life! even if they both have a huge amount of trouble realizing it, they both really love being with each other. They're both some of the most important people in each other's lives. But they still get to lead their own lives, which i find much healthier and does way better justice to Peter's character. Like, he is his own main character, and so is matt. Both of them are superheroes in their own right, and while they are huge allies, neither of them is less capable or some kind of damsel. neither of them is teh traditional hollywood love interest screaming for the hero to save them. So peter does not need his narrative chained to getting a boyfriend. he can get a boyfriend and stop a bomber.

and like. i want to be clear, i'm not shitting on romance as a genre. finding love can be the number one driving factor! that's okay! great even! especially if you don't want to have to devote a bunch of narrative space to a bunch of subplots. the pet peeve specifically arises when people set up a bunch of other stuff to make it more exciting, like some kind of villain or enemy, and either make it secondary to the love plot when the fucking murder attempt is objectively way more pressing, or when they make it into an excuse to damsel the "female" character for the love interest. Like, i'm sorry, peter can lift multiple fucking tons and you think the physically normal man is the one who does the rescuing? Peter is not a damsel. he has never been a damsel. like he looks like a twink but he is one of the most powerful heroes in comics and way too many people decide to damsel him just so whoever's playing his love interest can be a hero. In general, i don't like the entire trope of "love interest as damsel." Like. take MJ for example. She's been dangled off so many fucking bridges. but she's been in peter's life for forever. she's tough as nails and deserves having her own narrative and character independence outside of being someone you can dangle off a bridge.

I dunno, it's a balance that has to be struck for me, i'm not saying it's bad if love interests help each other. Like, Matt does help peter! Peter needed help that Matt specialized in (law), and Matt was able to help him! there's nothing wrong with needing help and matt and peter can and do pull each other's asses out of fires. but peter still gets to be strong and independent and capable and matt doesn't need to hold his hand through every fucking plot point, jesus christ. I think some of the best romances are ones where people are just looking at their partner being extremely badass and applauding. it just icks me out when one person is made less capable just so the other person can be a big fucking hero. so that's the number one thing i had in mind while improv'ing matt and peter's relationship.

I do plan on making matt more present in the plot, for the record! once i started getting a sense for what i was doing, i started realizing some things i wanted to have in there needed build up or they'd be coming out of left field, so we have a lot of narrative threads just set up that i'll be tying together soon.

The other reason why Matt hasn't been as present and will start being more present is because my biggest rule of writing is that I can never sacrifice character for plot. i've trashed and redone entire projects before because i decided that i hadn't brought the characters to the right point to make the decisions they were making for the sake of plot, so the plot had to go in order to make the characters right. it's more of a general vibe? the biggest guiding factor during all of this is whether I've gotten them to a point where I can understand why they're able to make the decisions they're making.

And there was no fucking way that Peter would ever get with Matt after hand-spun silk.

Part of this is because I very firmly believe that just sex cannot be a basis for a relationship, especially in the context of ABO. Like, if it's just that they spent a rut together? Nah. Losing control of your body and having hormone-fueled sex is not grounds for a relationship. if anything, it's the grounds for intensive therapy, not a relationship. Like, what do you like about their personality? how do you feel about their communication style? what if you hate the way they chew? Peter's never going to look at someone he just had a bunch of sex with and think "wow, we should be in love." Sex is great, fantastic, having good physical chemistry can be really valuable, but it's not the sole basis of love. He spent his entire life being objectified, and he's also someone who's in a very healthy long-term relationship where they had to work fucking hard to stay with each other.

MJ and Peter's love story was something that sort of strung itself together in the background and it became something I really, truly loved. Like, originally, I was trying to figure out how to just make Peter mentally good with offering to do this for a bro, and I decided he couldn't be in a relationship. He'd have to necessarily talk it through with someone else to clear it, and matt would have called the entire thing off the second it started causing more inconvenience than was already obvious, so that would derail it entirely. But I didn't want to do that thing where the preexisting female love interest is a huge bitch or inexplicably missing or whatever just to make way for a ship, so i decided that she was still a huge part of his life and decided to add in a gag where they called it on and off again like they were playing a game of hot potato. Inadvertently, that gave them an epic fucking love story of people who had to wake up every single day and make the conscious choice to love each other.

it's hard to show, because it's all stuff that happened in the past, but it's inherent in their everything. it's one of the reasons why they have such good communication--it was figure it out or destroy each other, and they figured it out. Inherently, Peter and MJ are extremely traumatized people subjected to structural violence and generational abuse. they spend every single day of their lives under extreme stress, from poverty and violence and inequality and fighting crime. their early relationship would have been a mess. they had to create ways to keep themselves from destroying each other. they had to spend a fucking decade meticulously laying boundaries and figuring out how the other worked best, and working fucking hard to respect and fulfill each other.

Like, most of it ended up written in their mannerisms. Like the scene where MJ's going off to get peter's camera--i fucking adored that scene, because Peter's arguing with her about how dangerous it is for her to go and how he doesn't want her to go while tying her shoes for her so she can go. That was extremely important for me because I felt it was the key to why their relationship ultimately worked. Because MJ would bitch slap anyone who tried to throw their weight around with her. She would never be with Peter if he was the kind of person who would think he could make that decision for her. Peter still gets a voice, he still gets to raise concerns, but he recognizes that it's her decision and he will enable her to make it. It's a huge act of respect and one of the fundamental building blocks of the way I made MJ's relationship with Peter was that they mutually respected each other.

The other thing I wanted was to make them deeply messy fucking people. That's why MJ's so crude in this--it's a choice, and a big source of trauma. She grew up in hyper traditionalism. I grew up in hypertraditionalism, and you aren't supposed to know what a dick joke is. You aren't supposed to swear. you're supposed to be perfect and ladylike and daren't say a word if the men say something unseemly and you shan't repeat such dastardly things.

Anyway, I have a mouth like a sailor and wrote a porn fic to see if i could. purity culture doesn't work.

So MJ grew up where she was just boxed in to only appear as perfect and ladylike as possible, so she went the opposite direction and became as crude as possible. she likes pushing people's buttons. she will make comments about your ass. And that's deeply inappropriate behavior at times. With peter and ned? They're used to it. They've consented to it. It's part of why they love her, actually. But slapping matt's ass? he didn't give her the green light to touch him like that, and she definitely wouldn't have done it if she hadn't been drunk. In the end, he didn't care, so no ultimately harm done, but there could have been harm done and she doesn't exactly get credit for lucking out. it doesn't mean that she's a bad person, it's just that she's not a perfect person and she does dumb fucking shit at times--which, everyone does. She's extremely messy, oversteps boundaries, and it's a direct product of trauma. Peter ain't exactly perfect either. he's borderline suicidially reckless and has trouble ever letting people into his decision-making process. He'll risk himself eleven days out of ten before giving an inch, which was one of the reasons he's nearly fucking killed himself with his heats.

So it ended with these extremely messy, imperfect people who had to try again and again to keep loving each other. So many romances, especially in the superhero genre, stem from some kind of inexplicable chemistry instead of conscious choice. MJ and Peter could have burnt out and stopped loving each other. They worked hard not to. That's important.

So Peter became this character that had an extremely hard won love that would have been invalidated every single day by people who thought biological chemistry was superior to a decade of fighting to be together. like, the omegaverse? It's fucking weird about biological predeterminism in general. one of the premises that i set for myself when i decided to do this was that i had to keep everything from the omegaverse but if it was something that was fucking stupid, i would make it a part of the stupid things that people believe or just a part of the absolute most extreme moments like heats and ruts.

like, for example, guys in my family would always say "men drink because they like it, women drink because they don't like something else." that's the stupidest fucking thing i've ever heard. do they think gender affects your fucking taste buds? also, have they ever thought for even half a second about the sheer number of men who are alcoholics and drink specifically as a coping mechanism? Women have better tasting drinks than men because someone randomly decided that beer was for men and fruity cocktails were for women, despite the fact that cocktails taste better and have stronger booze. it's the stupidest goddamn thing i've ever heard. but the world is full of dumb shit about biological predeterminism just like your fucking drink preference. So everything i hated in the ABO world just became that kind of thing.

So that thing in the ABO world? The thing where people just smell good and that means you're fated because you both smell really good to each other and, you know, you can base an entire relationship off smell? or the thing where you find someone of the opposite secondary gender and immediately they're the perfect alpha/omega for you and you're ready to do everything with them immediately upon meeting? That's present in this world. It's a dumb thing people tell Peter when trying to convince him and MJ that they'll never be happy with each other, and that some dumb fucking frat bro alpha can do more for them with goddamn body odor than a decade of dedicated love.

So Peter was never going to be able to get with Matt after hand-spun silk. Absolutely not. He's way too traumatized for that. If anyone suddenly developed feelings for him after years of platonic friendship when the most notable thing that changed was that they fucked due to a biological demand? He would never, in a million years, believe that they could have fallen for him because of his personality. He'd think it was just them deciding he made a good omega for them in bed and he'd leave deeply fucking hurt. Even if he realized he developed feelings for matt in the aftermath, he'd never trust any feelings matt developed to be real. Peter was in his right mind. matt wasn't. It would eternally fall into the same trap of "I was just play acting at being his obedient omega and that's what he was into."

Like, Matt too, for the record, just for different reasons. matt would have never gotten with Peter after hand-spun silk becuase he has a guilt complex the size of jupiter and he'd never in a million years make a move on peter after the guy just nuked his own life to save matt from dumbassery his twenty-something self willingly committed. No. He's going to crush everything down deep inside and then one day he'll die. And, honestly, I do think that would have been the right decision had Peter not liked him back.

One of the core distinctions i made between Peter and Matt's character is that Peter is really good at dealing with his emotions in a healthy way but is absolute shit at recognizing them. Matt's dumb as a fucking post about dealing with his emotions but tormented by his own awareness of them. So Peter's big problem is that he will be fully into someone and shuffle that away as something that's obviously not his own emotions, pshhhh. Matt, meanwhile, woke up after his rut, realized he had developed feelings fucking immediately, and then had a panic attack in the bathroom.

I'd like to go on record that neither of them developed feelings for each other because they fucked. it's because they, necessarily, had to be more intimate with each other than they would have ever been with like, their regular bro, and it made them realize that this person who'd they'd already die for is someone they'd really like to live for too. They had to go to bat for each other. Peter destroyed his own life to help matt. More than once, Matt fought through his hormones to try and give Peter an out because he'd rather he be hurt than Peter be hurt.

And, it's also the little shit. They talked a lot about things that they never would have talked about otherwise and realized how deeply they related to each other. they did a lot of little acts of intimacy, like when peter would scratch the base of Matt's neck because he liked it or when Matt would deny his impulses to help peter through anything. Neither of them really had to do that for the rut. They did it purely just as acts of caring, and those were the bits of each other that they got feelings for.

And those nice feelings would almost absolutely be crushed down forever in the aftermath of a rut. you'd have to drag them kicking and screaming to emotional realization. there's a lot of fucking work to put in before they can get past their own issues and realize that it's okay to give each other a shot.

I have a LOT of thoughts about the Johnny Storm debacle. It's going below, so if you're interested, read on. Some of it is what's outside of Peter's perspective and therefore not featured in hand-spun silk or chewing coffee. I doubt it will be able to make it into the fic, just because there's a lot that gets missed when you limit it to one character's perspective. There's still a chance it may come up, so there's a risk of spoilers.

The Johnny Storm thing is something that i think is a lot more nuanced than i was able to show. Part of it is that i made it up totally on the fly so it was very sloppy execution. Like, if you go back and read the Johnny parts of hand-spun silk? i shift the goal posts a LOT because i was still developing Peter's own character and figuring out how he would respond to all this. The other part of it is because this is totally from Peter's perspective, and so we have kind of a coke-bottle lens view of it.

See, the thing about the Johnny Storm thing is that i think it could have been a relatively minor speed bump in their relationship, and then circumstances, a few very poor choices, and plain bad luck blew it up into something major. I also think that Johnny Storm and Peter Parker would be great together, but that they could never work in an omegaverse specifically.

in the comics, i think they're fucking great together and make a fantastic ship. In the ABO world specifically, i think that Johnny would be ass over tea kettle in love with Peter, and Johnny would at best be a ship in the night for Peter.

Because the thing is, from Johnny's perspective, he was legitimately in love with Peter and did not ever want to hurt him.

I want to be clear, I'm not excusing the dumb shit he did. I have explanations for it, they're discussed below, but they're not excuses. He has to bear the blame all the same, but I think that it adds a little more nuance and makes it a little more tragic.

He was legitimately in love with Peter and it wasn't because of the rut in the same way Matt didn't get feelings for Peter because of the rut. Like, nothing about why Johnny fell for him had to do with the bits where Peter had to put on a show of being the perfect omega for him. Johnny actually really, truly loved him way better when he wasn't play-acting at being the perfect omega for him--which is why, at one point, Peter mentions that Johnny always made dumb fucking jokes during the rut and it would always snap him out of pretend and he'd instantly threaten to kick johnny's ass. Johnny really liked Peter's like, actual personality. He figured out early in their friendship that dumb fucking jokes always got a rise out of Peter, so he memorized them ahead of time and brought them up whenever he had enough sense to so he could get back to how Peter is normally, because that's the Peter he loved.

(which was another distinction I tried to draw between Matt and Johnny, incidentally. I decided to give Matt an identical moment in the rut where he was aware enough to realize that Peter was playing things up to cater to his hormones and try to get back to Peter's actual personality, which is the one that he actually had feelings for. However, Matt said directly to him that he was aware that he was putting on a show and let Peter consciously drop out of the headspace he had put himself into in favor of his genuine personality, whereas Johnny sort of tried to draw him out. Neither had any ill intentions behind it, but Matt's more consciously communicated with Peter.)

The thing about Peter is that he is the first partner Johnny ever had that treated him with the love and respect you'd give an actual partner, and they weren't even actually dating.

This entire thing has been a big mash up of the comics and the movies and the only rule is that I steal whatever i find funny. Like, Peter? I know most people think he's tom holland peter because of MJ and Ned, but his basis is actually comics Peter for me. Ned and MJ (and the Toomes plane crash) were the funniest fucking things from Homecoming for me, so I kept it. He has the key to the city like Tobey!Peter (because how the fuck do you explain having that, that's the most useless piece of decor over a guest can never see it) and a lot of the lines and personality i get from Andrew!Peter and most of the backstory and attitude is comics peter. Like, imagine whatever fucking Peter you want, I don't give a shit, I want everyone to have their own experiences with this fic, but all of the characters are really just a frankenstein, and Johnny is no exception.

Like the comics, he became a superhero when he was still a teenager, is the thing. He's been in the spotlight forever. Celebrity culture is fucking toxic as hell and he sort of was drowned in it young. Like, the thing in the movies, where he's dating an eternally changing supermodel who goes on live TV and announces that the most important thing about dating the human torch is fireproof lingerie? weird straight people celebrity bullshit. why would you ever fucking say that outloud to millions of people jesus christ. and it's all this johnny has ever really known, relationship-wise.

Like, it's give and take. He's not exactly a passive participant or victim or whatever. He likes having sex and has a lot of it (and there's nothing wrong with that). He fully wanted Peter Parker to be a notch on his belt and nothing more when they first met, and his expectation was that Peter Parker would be another person who wanted to happily fuck a celebrity--and then would probably post on Twitter a full review of how he was in bed, without ever asking Johnny and with Johnny never consenting to it.

So Johnny made the stupid fucking decision to roll up to Peter in a sports car to ask him if he could take Peter for a ride, and Peter immediately fucking laughed in his face, asked him if he thought dick size correlated with how stupid your car was, then proceeded to call MJ in front of him and heckle about it for seven minutes straight before walking off to catch the subway. this peter believes in eating the rich and was deeply unimpressed.

Like. johnny benefits from his public image, dont get me wrong. He gets a lot of hook ups because of his image and certainly isn't upset by this fact. But the standard that was set when he was very young and dating for the first time and getting his heart broken for the first time was that his body was public narrative and he was being used for his name and the publicity attached to it. he got fucked up by it. It was a long string of toxic relationships that usually ended up on the front page of a lot of tabloids--and that's how it always was and that's all he ever expected. his nudes get leaked without his consent and everyone acts like it's a completely okay thing on the person's part, and he should have known better and is at fault. his exes sell interviews. he gets photographed on his walk of shame and the person he hooked up with goes on ellen to reveal that he does perform oral. and i'm not going to say he was comfortable with any of that, he wasn't, he hated it, but he wasn't looking to change the status quo--partially because he didn't fully believe that the status quo would change, partially because he was having fun with hookups and wasn't looking to settle down (which, again--as long as both people go in knowing that's all it is, is not a bad thing). He'd always be johnny storm. There'd always be a price tag attached to intimate parts of his life, and a lot of fucking people would be more than happy to cash in.

Peter would rather rip out his own appendix than be publicly known as the person who risked getting set on fire to climb on Johnny Storm's dick, however.

So, for the first time, Johnny found himself in a relationship where the person was genuinely only in it for him. Peter didn't want the novelty of fucking a celebrity. He didn't want to go on a talkshow or go viral because he leaked a picture of johnny's dick. He rather violently and aggressively cared about Johnny and Johnny alone, actually. It was sort of Johnny's first experience ever, after years of dating in the public eye, where he was in a relationship where no one was looking to exploit him. The other thing was that they did this for a long time. This was a month they spent together, most of which didn't involve Peter having to play pretend because that wasn't necessary until right before the rut.

And from Peter's perspective, they did the same shit they always did, just with sex, so there wasn't any change. From Johnny's perspective, he got to spend a month in constant contact with someone who genuinely cared about him, was hilarious and ridiculous and one of the best fucking people he had ever met. Like, he loved that Peter brewed coffee with red bull. He thought it was ludicrous. He was in love with how ridiculous Peter was. So he found himself wanting to keep with it afterwards. he wanted his relationship to be with someone who genuinely cared about him and treated him with respect the way no one else had.

The problem was they were never in a fucking relationship in the first place, which was a slight wrench in the works.

There are three reasons why it blew up as bad as it did/why they would never work, and that's 1) outside forces, 2) privilege, and 3) just plain dumb immature love.

Outside forces:

This is the absolute biggest thing that I think sank them, and it's kind of sad in the sense that it was legitimately outside of Johnny's control. The media is the biggest one. If they got together, eventually, the news would get out. It would be chaos. Like. Johnny's an A-Lister, and a fucking superhero A-Lister. In the public eye, Peter's a total nobody. It would be rabid. It'd be like if every wattpad fanfic about one direction falling in love with some random girl from fucking iowa or whatever the trope is came true.

I could write an essay on how biological predeterminism and natural law resulted in like 97% percent of modern issues and inequality, but this is already too long for anyone to read. but the omegaverse would undoubtedly be 1000x worse about it, holy fucking hell. which means the way we treat women in our world? even worse in the omegaverse.

The public narrative fully thinks that he's a slut who will fuck any cape that looks at him twice. He's been considered a slut since before he even agreed to fuck Johnny. It was a given, and Peter knew that going into it. Like, no one had any illusions that the human torch was going to find a nice omega for his rut and settle down in holy matrimony before they so much as graze each other's hands god bless amen praise the lord jesus christ. The expectation is that whoever would be sharing the rut would just be doing it casually. that's PEAK slut behavior. Peter's a public whore from the start, and while it always bothered him, he didn't care about that nearly as much when there wasn't any chance people could find him or his loved ones.

If he actually ended up with Johnny? Nightmare situation. Jesus Christ, he'd never know peace. People would hate him and be jealous of him and psychoanalyze everything he ever did. he's queer. He's in love with MJ, a fellow omega. he drinks red bull with coffee and is a fucking mess. he wants zero children. Johnny's an alpha, and a superhero to boot. People would eternally expect him to be the perfect omega and it would not fucking work out.

And that's something that can be overcome, don't get me wrong. The important people in the relationship are teh ones actually in it. But it's a huge stressor factor, and It's one I don't think they could have overcome for other reasons.

The other big outside stressor is the Fantastic Four.

Full cop, I don't like Reed Richards. I think he's a dick. He is the only one i directly was trying to character assassinate. for the record? they were fully in the wrong for everything they did. But I think most of the shit they pulled arose from assumptions that would have been extremely likely had it been anyone other than Peter.

because from their perspective, they're trying to protect Johnny from what's already been the biggest violation of his life.

his private health information got leaked by people they hired, and it became a talk show matter. johnny was visibly tormented by it. they felt like shit and knew it was only going to get worse. he was going to live with whoever did this talking about his dick for a solid year after. it was going to be brutal if he ended up hurting whoever he fucked. they were in damage control mode. legally, NDAs around sex cannot be enforced (a lot of celebrities try to have them--it's just a scare tactic. not a court in the US would ever enforce one. it's legitmately impossible to make them binding, but i won't get into why). so whatever happens, it's almost definitely going to make the news.

Then, in strolls baby brother, having announced that he found an omega all on his own.

and it's a fucking reporter from the superhero slander newspaper. They were fully convinced that not only was peter doing this for fame, but this was basically a work assignment for him.

All of Peter's butting heads with them was him setting very healthy and necessary boundaries. From their perspective, it looked like he was trying to increase his bottom line.

He was forgoing all health precautions--because he refused to fuck their brother in a monitored room on videotape with eight medical professionals watching at all times and the EMTs and the fucking fire department in the next room listening to him get it on. he's got superhealing and a precognition for danger that let's him know when johnny's getting too riled up and he needs to calm him down or dodge a dick fire. From his perspective, danger is minimal and he isn't making a fucking sex tape or putting on a week-long peepshow for a bunch of total strangers.

The F4 saw a totally normal unenhanced human willing to get third degree burns inside of him if it meant that he'd get a bigger payout when he appeared on oprah.

Same thing with pregnancy. Peter demand a certain level of dignity from the proceedings. He was going out of his way and fucking a friend, their baby brother, exclusively for said friend's benefit. He gets the fucking dignity of not being treated like a cheap whore who needs to be monitored to make sure he's not going to baby trap someone he'd never be able to get otherwise. He was not going to let the Four watch him take the contraceptives or the pregnancy tests of his own free will, because that's fucking humiliating.

For the F4? Great, not only is Peter going to leak this all afterwards and break Johnny's heart, he's definitely going to be an eternal source of emotional devastation because he's looking to get a fucking child out of this that Johnny will forever be tied to.

And the problem was that it was all based on the assumption that Peter was doing this out of self-interest. And they don't get a pass for treating someone fucking terrible just because they thought he was going to hurt their baby brother down the line. But without the context that Peter was spider-man and a good person, it was the plainest thing in the world that he'd be leaking all of this. So the F4 became a huge source of stress and bad feelings that constantly hung over anything Johnny and Peter could have had.

Privilege

This is another thing where Johnny wasn't consciously trying to do something bad, but it is something that sort of made everything worse. Johnny's rich. A celebrity. Male. An alpha. White. He's about as privileged as you can possibly get.

And I think that it's important to note that that's not a source of fault, but it is a thing that you have to be aware of. And I didn't think Johnny would be aware of his privilege throughout this and it would make everything worse, simply because his privilege never really came into play with Peter.

Peter could not care less about whether or not Johnny was rich, or white, or an alpha. In fact, that's more likely to be an active deterrent than anything else. So Johnny walked in with the mindset of "this is someone who just cares about me for me. he doesn't care that i'm famous or rich or whatever. we just care about each other's actual selves." And that's true!

Doesn't take into account every fucking other person on the planet, though.

A lot of Johnny's fuck ups were directly sourced in the fact that he didn't consider his privilege. He sort of took this on with the mindset of the media being a storm they'd have to eventually weather together, if they did end up together. And he's used to that. He's been eternally in the public eye for years. It's hell, but it's something you can get through together. but he didn't consider that that storm would be extremely different for someone who had money, resources, clout, who wasn't an alpha, and also who wasn't at times in a publicly queer and interracial relationship.

The media storm for Johnny is horrible and invasive. For Peter, it's "hey, haha, is Someone Going To Kill My Entire Family." Johnny didn't even think about showing up on Peter's doorstep with roses, because he's never even goddamn had to pay rent before. it didn't even occur to him that this may make people come to try and kill Peter and his family (Peter's fucking Spider-Man--he's the last person in the world to worry about handling some random fangirl) and it didn't occur to him that it may put Peter in the very difficult position of not being able to afford to move. Johnny's already been to Peter's apartment before. So he didn't even think about how showing up with roses would end with months of serious agonizing stress for Peter.

And it's not an excuse, but it is an explanation and it is something that he has to learn from. Like, there's a lot of fuck ups i've unthinkingly done because i didn't even know it would be a fuck up. i've been privileged in ways I wasn't aware of and ended up with egg on my face. In Johnny's case, that wasn't a minor fuck up you learn from and move on from, it spiraled into something bigger than it otherwise might have been.

Immature dumb love

The last factor in why this went the way it did was simply because this was very much this Johnny's first real time being in love and he was sort of fucking stupid about it.

Like, Peter's lightyears ahead of Johnny when it comes to "being in love" maturity because he has intensive experience. He and MJ had to fight for their fucking lives figuring out how to navigate a relationship. Johnny's never once been in a real one that didn't come with the expectation of "hey so we're gonna fuck around for a while and in the end you're inevitably going to leak my dick pics and tell everyone that i'm good with my tongue and get a spot on a night show from it, and I'm going to feel embarrassed every time i leave my home for a while." Johnny's like. Early twenties. People in their early twenties have a vast fucking range of things they're really mature in and things they're total fucking dumbasses in. i'm 23 and i've got things i'm lightyears ahead of my peers in and things i'm like a toddler in. He's young and fucking stupid about some things, and in this case? He fell in love for the first time and blue screened completely.

he got butterflies and set himself on fucking fire on live TV at the mention of his crush, inadvertently starting a media frenzy. You could see his crush from fucking space. he had no idea how to handle doing this like an adult, because every other relationship started with making a pass and immediately hooking up. He tried that with Peter and Peter asked him if he thought dick size correlated with how stupid his car was he has no backup plan. So he just started choking on his own dumb feelings.

For the record? His intent was never to make Peter feel like he was less capable. He knows Peter is capable. But he got within twenty fucking feet of peter and ended up choking on his own panic and emotions like a school kid with a crush. So he just ended up hanging around his crush and fumbling around him and checking in with him way too often and being extremely conscious of how sweaty his palms are or how many times he asked Peter how he was doing in the span of one conversation, fuck that was too many this got weird.

But we don't see Johnny's internal reasoning. We see his actions through Peter. Who has spent his entire life being pushed down and treated like he's some helpless damsel when he's the most competent person in any room he's in. So everything gets filtered through a narrator who's not entirely reliable, and intentions get read in that aren't exactly there.

Johnny's plan when confessing his feelings was to try and handle it like an adult. He dressed up and got roses, because that's what Sue told him you do when you're trying to make a big romantic gesture. He was going to confess his feelings as best he could and respect Peter's decision no matter what.

.... And then he walked right into the knowledge that Peter was in that very moment fucking another alpha and got brutally kneecapped by his own disappointment. His entire plan got put on the off-step.

When Peter let him down, what was going through his head was that he was extremely disappointed and didn't want to put that on peter, so he wanted to give them space so Johnny could get over him and not impose his feelings on Peter unfairly. What came out was "let's not be friends for a while," which isn't actually what he meant but people don't say exactly what they mean in the moment a lot. He realized that after the fact, got panicked that he might have fucked up the best friendship he ever had, and then fucked up even worse by trying to fix it in the moment instead of respecting the words Peter was actively telling him. And that's still his fuck up, and he still needed to respect boundaries. But the reasoning wasn't "I don't see you as someone worthy of respect," it was "i'm in a panic spiral and making poor decisions."

The worst, most egregious thing Johnny did, and in my opinion the one that's the absolute hardest to forgive, was when he started a public fight with matt on the bridge where he directly talked about peter's fucking sex life in front of people.

Like holy fucking hell, that one there's no real valid explanation for. Like, i included it because comic book characters, especially Johnny Storm, are very impulsive and hotheaded and a lot of people do fucking stupid things in the heat of a bad moment. It was an act of total immaturity, jealousy, and the culmination of a lot of disappointment and bad feelings that resulted in him saying a lot of really fucking dumb things that he regretted immediately after he said them and has been absolutely torturing himself over ever since. And, once again, his regret doesn't excuse his actions, and it's up to peter as to whether he'll ever get forgiveness.

I think the entire Johnny Storm thing, under different circumstances, could have been minor. Johnny could have confessed his feelings, Peter could have turned him down. Johnny could have swallowed his disappointment and they would have moved on. But a lot of outside stressors, bad timing, and people being their worst selves resulted in Johnny fucking up with way worse effects than otherwise it could have been. His decisions are on him, don't get me wrong, but I think sometimes just plain bad luck can also lead us to being worse versions of ourselves. I will say that a lot of the harm he caused was unintentional, and he is actively in deep regret over it--and not because he lost out on a romantic partner, for the record. He regrets hurting the best friend he ever had, hurting someone who helped him at dear cost to himself, and potentially losing him forever.

[askanaroace]

I'm actually kind of upset at this response, and I'm not looking for an apology. I just want to be heard. And please recognize I acknowledge my own accountability here, because 50% of communication is talking, and it's on me to communicate what I would like for you to hear.

The point that the question is broad is my entire point. That's not a bad thing!!! It's just...not a thing that seems to get acknowledged when people ask these questions. And note I'm saying "people" and not "you" because, while this is coming up on your post, it's something I've seen a lot from a lot of different people. These questions of "how do I write [x] character" is like asking "how do I write a story?"

Sure, there's plenty of help and guidance out there for that. Either in school or your own research, you've been taught a ton of foundations for this: grammar and sentence structure and the parts of a story. But none of that writes a story for you. It's foundational knowledge that you have to take and use apply it together as a whole in order to write a story.

And there's also a lot of untaught parts to writing a story. You hear a lot that if you want to write, then you need to read. If you want to do art, then you need to study the world. Because there's things about creation and art that can't exactly be taught. You have to sit down and experience and feel what works for others and figure out how to incorporate that into your own art.

And I KNOW that's scary, when you feel such a responsibility as depicting a marginalized identity that you don't experience, especially as when any of these such depictions that occur in major media always get hypercriticized by the audience.

What I am trying to say is that this is OKAY. You are going to fuck up. You are going to upset someone. You know why these characters get hypercriticized?

It's because we're STARVED for representation, so we're in a phase where it feels like any representation has to be a picture of all representation, and that's literally impossible. People are too diverse for that. No matter what kind of aromantic character you write, it cannot possibly represent all aromantic people. Some aros are loveless. Some are hopeless romantics. Some aros are asexual. Some are allosexual. Some don't prescribe to the SAM at all. Some aros want to date. Some don't. Some aros are romance repulsed. Some aros desire romance. Some aros are white. Some aros are black. Some aros are brown. Some aros are neurodivergent. Some aros are neurotypical. Some aros have faced a lot of arophobia. Some aros have never faced blatant arophobia.

One person cannot represent everyone. The way we solve this problem of hypercriticism is by not being afraid and continuing to add more and more and more diversity in our creations. When there is choice, people won't have to feel the pressure of representing everyone all at once, a task of Sisyphus proportions.

Because for every person who thinks your choices were "bad representation" in some way is going to be a person who actually related to that representation and is glad for it.

Which is why you need to just jump in and do it. Even realistic stories will take advantage of the natural state of art in that the real world rules don't have to matter. We don't need five pages of your character going to the bathroom. That shit - literally - can happen off-screen. We can understand that this stuff doesn't all fit in a story, and what we want in the story is the story. The joy of art is in the imperfection. There is no art when there is perfection.

So write. Let it be bad. Hell, let it be offensive. Just get the story out. See what you learn by doing so. The second draft will be so much different - and so much better - by allowing yourself to write badly and learn from it. And it will help you realize that, while research can help make a story better, what really makes the story is the storytelling. Not the hours of frustrating research you put into it.

So you took my response to mean you should ask more directed questions. That's fine; I'll answer them. But I hope you'll hear my broader perspective here which is that there isn't a right or wrong way to write an aro character because people are diverse and complicated and contradictory, and anything you can think of...is likely something someone out there has thought/experienced/done. Research, yes. Try to get the basics right, yes. But at the end of the day, the most important part is sitting down to actually write your story.

Specifically: this person could theoretically have sexual relationships that are not romantic (probably doesn't matter but I feel I should note the character doesn't really have a gender and can change the form of their genitalia at will)? If so, how would that work?

I mean this gently, lovingly, supportive, and I'm realizing here that you must actually be pretty young.

Honey, alloromantic allosexuals have purely sexual relationships all the fucking time. This isn't even an allosexual aromantic thing. It's just a thing people who want to have sex (or feel they are supposed to have sex) do.

They have one night stands. They have flings. They have friends with benefits. They have booty calls. They have hatefucks. They get drunk and have sex they don't even remember - and yes, a lot of the time that's even on purpose.

They work all sorts of ways. No commitment. Commitment. In secret. Openly. Sometimes there's romantic feelings or platonic feelings involved, sometimes there's not. Sometimes these feelings are denied or end the sexual relationship. Sometimes these feelings are just a fact but don't control the nature of the relationship because people do not have to make decisions based on how they feel. Just because you romantically like someone doesn't mean you work well in a relationship or that you want a relationship. People can acknowledge that and navigate the sexual relationship they want instead. Sometimes feelings are one-sided and only one person in the relationship feels them. People deal. Thus is a part of life.

Is there an aro version of demisexual? (I'll probably google these anyway tho)

Yes. Unsurprisingly, it's called demiromantic.

Specifically that I don't think it'd be a good idea to look up (because I'd get cringy results): do you know any good insults said character could use if somone is being pissy about their identity (as an aro, as somone who doesn't understand gender and doesn't have one, as a limited shape shifter that primarily lives on islands or the deep sea, as a user of magic that is stereotyped as evil?)

I find calling someone a "fuckface" and suggesting they "leave me the hell alone" when they're being an asshole is usually a good way to get my anger out.

The insults they use are going to depend on the culture YOU develop for them. There's not like...a box of aro-specific insults (?) to draw from. You are the one that gave this character life and personality. What do you think they would say?

yall I'm trying to write an aro character but idk how to any advice?

[lio-the-chaotic-nonbeanie-weenie]

Sanders Sides Book HCs because I’m bored

Roman

Owns lots of fantasy books and drawing reference books

Also poetry books and Shakespearean material

Has books in French and Spanish

Has a lot of art books and fairy tale books and fantasy books and romance novels

Has some books from childhood. His favorite is Rainbow Fish.

Also has the entire collection of Magic Treehouse.

Shares a collection of Dr. Seuss books with Remus. Their shared favorite is green eggs and ham. 

Has books on all kinds of mythology. 

Also has a book on his realm. For emergencies. 

Keeps his bookcase organized so he can find things easily and also because he loves how pretty the colors look all organized. 

Logan

He has plenty, plenty books. 

Like, he has so many that Roman made him a library. Spaced theme, of course. 

Has books on different topics like rocks and minerals, gemstones, marine biology, mythology, and space. (totally not self-projecting here)

Has a shit ton of dictionaries from the first one to the most recent one. Adds a new one every time there’s an update.

Prefers actual books over a tablet. 

Has a collection of those colorful yearly Almanacs because they were a gift from Patton. He only reads them for the space and science fiction.

Has all the Star Trek and Sherlock Holmes books. Roman’s Sherlock Holmes gift to him is in there as well. 

Has books everywhere in his bedroom because he loves to read and keeps forgetting to put them away. 

Virgil

Has a few self help books from Logan.

Owns a few band magazines.

Has a collection of simple coloring books from Roman to help him de-stress.

Has few sketch books also from Roman to doodle in as a distraction or when Roman needs company.

Has a few horror novels but nothing too scary for him.

Prefers audiobooks but sometimes reads actual books. 

Has a few cookbooks for when he wants to try a new recipe. 

Has a smol bookshelf since he listens to audiobooks. 

Has a shit ton of audiobooks.

Patton

Has a lot of kids’ books.

Also scrapbooks for each side.

And picture books

Also has plenty of kids’ coloring books and adult mandala coloring books.

Has those feel and touch books, lift the flap books, and those books that come with sound buttons.

has a book full of bedtime stories.

has plenty of cookbooks and baking books.

has books with pictures of cats and dogs and frogs

Has the entire collection of Junie B Jones books for laughs.

His books are a mess and disorganized on the shelf. 

Some of his books are worn from constant reading and rereading

Janus

Has a lot of philosophy books

Also has books on snake care and health

Has books on wine and its history as well as guide to tasting wine and types of wine

Probably has a book on the art of deception

Is a mystery novel lover. Especially ones with a lot of twists and turns.

Has a few bookcases that are organized by genre and type. 

Has a few poetry and drama books. Some he totally didn’t steal from Roman.

Has a book of scary stories that he reads to Remus before bed. 

Remus

Has the entire collection of goosbumps.

Has a lot of horror novel with extra detailed gore and violence.

Also has a lot of erotica books 

Probably has tentacle hentai books hidden somewhere too

Has a book on serial killers

Shares a Dr Seuss collection with Roman.

Has books on squids and octopus and other cephalopods. They have plenty of pictures too.

Has books on dark and disgusting topics

Hides books in his bed for late night reading and has books everywhere in his room. 

“Why use a bookcase when I can just throw shit everywhere?” is his reason.

Uses a trashcan as his container for books

Has fifty shades of grey but only reads it for a laugh

[spookyjarchivist]

i have such mixed feelings on tauriel

okay lets start with the premise of making her: “there are too many men in this movie and while we cant add a shit ton of characters, we can at least add this one woman and give her a big-ish part”

and that’s cool! i love it! great idea! BUT then their execution is “let’s make her whole story about romance”

which, is not great, like i admit the characters have chemistry, but it’s super uncomfortable to shoehorn in a romance for no reason, and i will get to the intricacies of my feelings on that mess in a minute and focus on the worst part which is “it’s also a love triangle :)”

which inFURIATES me, like why are you doing such a huge disservice to this admittedly GOOD character that you’ve created, i genuinely like tauriel as a character, she’s cool! i just hate the story they gave her!!! and it fucks up legolas’ entire character plot

and this is why the romance bothers me besides the insult to women in general!!!

it may seem really dumb, but it’s 100% because it ruins the character journeys in lotr, legolas no longer has any actual issues with dwarves!!! like, it weakens and cheapens the significance of legolas and gimli’s friendship!!! and THAT’s ignoring the very valid (and possibly canon tbh) interpretation that legolas and gimli are also romantic

there’s a REASON, THEMATICALLY and NARRATIVELY, why legolas and gimli are the only elf and dwarf with a close relationship in literal MILLENNIA and they just made it all “he jealous of kili and their kingdoms were jerks to each other” which BLATANTLY IGNORES AND MISCONSTRUES THE LITERAL MILLENNIA OF HATRED AND RACISM BETWEEN ALL DWARVES AND ELVES, not just the woodland realm and erebor(maybe durin’s folk/the longbeards in general if u squint)

legolas and gimli are ROYALS which adds to the significance of their choice to throw away thousands of years worth of hatred, as royalty they are representing their people and their friendship signals a start of being able to make repairs to the relationship between the two races on a level that has not existed since BEFORE KHAZAD-DUM FELL

but no let’s instead make the pretty lady elf fall in love with a dwarf when it could’ve been a much deeper storyline more focused on the tension between their peoples that could have enhanced lotr’s story instead of making that part nonsensical which would have been both a better story AND not have reduced a good character to a love interest

i guess my mixed feelings on tauriel really just boil down to SHE DESERVED BETTER THAN A DUMB ROMANCE TRIANGLE PLOTLINE THAT WAS ACTIVELY UNDERMINING THE REST OF THE MOVIES

[ajaxwrites]

Genshin Impact Fanfic Rec List

(because this is my most current obsession~~)

The Narwhal of Dihua Marsh by GreyLiliy

Childe hears of a strong Adeptus living at the Wangshu Inn. Despite warnings from Zhongli that fighting Xiao would be a deathly mistake, Childe seeks out the Adeptus living in the Dihua Marsh eager for a proper fight.

However, Childe severely underestimates his opponent, and the consequences of his actions may keep him from returning home to Snezhnaya.

Ships: Zhongli/Childe

Notes: This fic is interesting primarily because it's not necessarily what you would call an easy story to read. The content can surprisingly get quite heavy as the relationship between Childe and Zhongli isn't healthy and it becomes increasingly obvious as the story progresses. You swing between wanting to separate the two and also desperately wishing that they'll work out because there is something there. The story snowballs from what seems like an innocuous, if stupid and rash, decision on Childe's part to a complicated mess that you can’t help but be enthralled in. I went in expecting your typical romance and ended up in something that was more complex than I expected but also beautifully thought provoking.

Entirely Out of Spite by Bgtea

"Welcome to a new user experience! You have triggered this interface with the keywords, ‘Stupid game! Stupid devs! I want my f*****g money back!’ You are now bound to the character Tartaglia, the Eleventh Harbinger of the Fatui, codename: Childe! We hope you have an enjoyable user experience and we welcome you once again to Genshin Impact 2.0!”

Those are some of the first words Ajax, starving college student extraordinaire, has the misfortune of hearing upon waking up in a brave new world from what he's fairly sure is a very, very fatal accident involving water and a shit ton of electricity.

Okay, so he's not dead. That's good. But what's this about him being stuck playing the character Tartaglia? Tartaglia, as in the shitty, one-dimensional, cartoonish villain who met his untimely, gruesome death in the first act of the original game?

Fuck that noise. Like hell Ajax is going to share that fate.

And so begins one man's journey to unfuck himself.

Ships: Zhongli/Childe

Notes: Whenever this updates, I squeal. If you’re a fan of The Scum Villain's Self-Saving System or just transmigration/reincarnation plots in general, you’re going to love it. Bgtea does a beautiful job in balancing humor with the trauma that comes with the whole reincarnation plotline. The whole of it is beautiful written and watching Childe/Ajax interact with the other characters (and the perspective of those characters) is a delight! 

the sister by glassdrachma

The tragic and unexpected death of Zhongli-xiansheng of the Wangsheng Funeral Parlor occurred to the sorrow of many and the deep skepticism of a few.

Ships: Zhongli/Childe

Notes: glassdrachma has a gift for humor and romance. In short, Zhongli fakes his death for plot reasons and comes back as Jianlao, the bereaved twin sister. Shenanigans ensue, featuring overprotective Liyue-ians (?), chaotic gremlin Venti, and Kexing. Very light hearted, good for the soul.

The White Cicada Society by clementinesgulag

After his little brother is bundled back to Snezhnaya, Childe makes good on his promise to the traveller and takes the first boat out of Liyue Harbor. Any sense of homecoming lasts about as long as an uncooked steak in front of Xiangling, however, when his boat sinks, grounding him back in the mainland.

It's just as well, because the next morning, a body is found in the Northland Bank. A visit from a fellow Harbinger reveals a far more insidious plot than anything Childe could concoct with a god of the vortex and twenty minutes without supervision. The murders aren’t limited to the one Bank. They’ve been trailing down the Liyue border, getting closer and closer to the city. The Tsaritsa has a new mission for him: to figure out who, or what is targeting Fatui forces.

Against his best wishes, Childe is forced to see Zhongli again at the morgue. It becomes clear that he’s going to need a guide, and Childe resolves to quash his pride, and their differences to request his help to navigate Liyue and solve the case.

Ships: Zhongli/Childe

Notes: A diamond in the rough that I slept on and then stumbled back to by accident. I had it marked for later on AO3 and forgot about it for like a good week to my utter self-disgust. It. Is. So. Damn. Good! The mystery is intriguing but I live for the realistic portrayal of the aftermath of the whole gnosis plotline. The betrayal, the bitterness, but ah, the sexual tension. The harbinger interactions in this fic make it gold though.

Lungs full of Roses by SecretlyACatLady

Childe had always assumed that he would die young. He had accepted that a long time ago, ever since he accepted the mantle of a Fatui Harbinger. However, he always thought that he would die in a glorious fight, his body broken but spirit relishing the strong opponent that had bested him. He was okay with that type of death.

Unfortunately, it seemed like Fate had decided to add one last insult to injury, because, here Childe was, dying because he had fallen in love with the ex-Geo Archon. The same Archon who seemed to have discarded him like an old toy ever since the Osial Incident. --- In which divine beings are cruel and a cursed Childe starts preparing for his inevitable death because no Archon could ever love a mortal.

…Right?

Ships: Zhongli/Childe

Notes: The fic that started it all for me, the one that sucked me into the fandom. This fic is heartbreaking. We always do love a hanahaki plotline but something about the way it frames the disease and the shame that comes with it...I highly recommend giving it a read. The angst is real I tell you.

The Bride of The Golden Dragon by Erika_Bee

“You’re to be sent on a special mission, Tartaglia.”

The young man’s eyes gleamed in interest. “How special?” He asked as he wiped the blood off his daggers.

His superior grinned. “Special enough to put your name in Snezhnaya’s history books.”

—

In which the Archon War ravaged the land of Liyue and to ensure the people’s survival, the God of Geo established the Harvester Contract: One bride per village, every year, in exchange for protection and a good harvest.

Or: Childe is sent on an undercover mission to kill the Geo Archon, but things don’t go as planned.

Ships: Zhongli/Childe

Notes: Don’t let the title scare you off--this isn’t one of those fics where they feminize one of the male characters and reduce their personality to a mindless submissive bobblehead to the point that I want to throw my laptop out of the window. Not that there’s anything wrong if you like that kind of thing, just not my cup of tea. This fic though---READ IT! There’s just something refreshing about the writing and the plot, the way that Childe’s character reads off the page. I live for the interactions between the characters and how the author has mapped the relationships. Warning that recent chapters have swerved decided into NSFW territory though.

the brothers grim by izabellwit

Left in an unfamiliar land with a mission he never wanted, a young Kaeya lies, survives, and somehow finds a family in the process.

Or: How Kaeya came to Dawn Winery, and why he left it. Includes lore, sibling bickering, found family struggles, and a more in-depth look at the years between Kaeya’s arrival and Crepus’s death.

Ships: N/A

Notes: Ahh, little Kaeya. Cheeky ass little shit that’s too angsty and adorable for his own good. I don’t have words for this fic. It makes my heart warm but also makes me want to weep because god, this fic covers exactly how traumatic Kaeya’s situation is and why child soldiers/spies just shouldn’t be. And the dynamic he has with Diluc and Crepus--do me a favor and read it. Screams found family.

the wind through the mountain tops by glassdrachma

Boredom brings Barbatos of Mondstadt to bother a certain ex-Archon of the Earth.

Ships: Zhongli/Childe

Notes: A light-hearted, humorous and fluffy as hell piece. Short word is that Venti comes to Liyue for some fun, causes chaos, accidentally plays matchmaker, and steals some vegetables. A get-together fic for Childe and Zhongli that includes a surprisingly self-aware (if blunt and snarky) Zhongli and jealous Childe that gets increasingly flustered.

melt (speak or forever hold your peace) by anatakana

Falling into bed with Diluc was an unbelievably bad idea given their tumultuous shared history, but Kaeya’s impulsive urge to amuse himself knew no bounds.

It’s all fun and games until emotions got involved.

Ships: Diluc/Kaeya

Notes: THIS IS NSFW. With plot though? This is THE FIC that got me shipping the two (though the game did a good job on its own). The angst is real here and we love the sheer gal of both of these two stupid men.

Cascading (In a good way) by Hubbleablubble

Kaeya is a fascinating annoyance.

(Or: A series of events in which Albedo gets to know Kaeya, and they slowly go from strangers to acquaintances to something more.)

Ships: Albedo/Kaeya

Notes: Sweet fic. Not my typical ship pairing. Loved the Khaenri’ah mentions. Kaeya is Trans FTM here though it’s only briefly mentioned. There is also an incomplete sequel (as of May 2021) featuring an Overprotective Big Brother Diluc on a warpath giving shovel talks to everyone except apparently Albedo that’s also worth reading.

The Language of Flowers by Jules (Penwyn)

Kaeya Alberich has made a habit of lying—after all, the only truths he’s ever spoken cost him everything—but there are only so many lies a man can tell before the truth comes spilling out.

Ships: Diluc/Kaeya

Notes: Hanahaki! Except not! Basically, Kaeya pukes up flowers that say the truth whenever he lies. Cue, angst! Lovely and quick read--love Kaeya’s voice here.

i know i'm where i'm meant to go by paperclips (pastel_paperclips)

"Childe," Zhongli says suddenly. "I am enjoying myself greatly."

Childe’s face breaks into a grin. "Then-"

Zhongli gasps, grabbing his wrist and tugging him over to an unsuspecting peddler with a cart full of rocks. "Is that an intrusive igneous pegmatite formed in the Inazuma regions?"

Childe’s grin smooths into a small, adoring smile. He has all the time in the world to figure the other man out.

OR: Finding the Geo Archon is on Childe's to-do list but hanging out with Zhongli is significantly more fun.

Ships: Zhongli/Childe

Notes: Childe, you idiot. Humorous and funny, very light hearted. Makes you wonder if Childe has an IQ. He’s too busy pining/lovesick to realize that he told his target that he’s going to kill him for his gnosis. Zhongli and Liyue remain confused on how Childe still DOES NOT get it but half-ass hiding his Archon status anyway.

the bird without wings by Anonymous

"Kaeya!" someone yells. Small arms wrap around his waist tightly, red hair spilling out of the ponytail, and Kaeya's heart almost stops.

He's talked his way out of all types of situations. From placating international disputes to buttering up his informants, he's always had a quick response to everything.

But for once, Kaeya is speechless. He stares down at the boy with puffy cheeks, slightly crooked teeth and sparkling bright eyes.

Eight year old Diluc beams back.

Ships: Diluc/Kaeya

Notes: Diluc gets de-aged and Kaeya gets angsty. The interactions between the two are heartwarming and will induce tears. Childe makes a brief appearence that *chef’s kiss*

call me "lover boy" by Anonymous

Zhongli turns back, eyes bright with amusement, a stray lilypad still stuck in his hair, and Childe thinks, wow. I want to kiss him stupid.

Childe's not into the whole "swooning maiden patiently waiting for his beloved to swoop down and smooch the daylights out of him" thing. Nah, that's not his style. He's Tartaglia, eleventh of the Fatui harbingers, and he's going to kiss Zhongli right now.

Ships: Zhongli/Childe

Notes: FUNNY AS HELL. Childe is straight up just trying to plant one on Zhongli but fate and people just keep interfering. It’s a weird trope aversion where the character is actively trying to confess rather than avoiding it but life gets in the way. 

springtime in snezh-nya-ya by miaomaomei

Tartaglia’s body moves before he can even think about it. He arches his back and flattens his ears against his head, baring his teeth in a hiss. Considering he barely even reaches Scaramouche's knees — Scaramouche, of all people! The guy is practically the size of a fourteen-year-old — he doubts that he is cutting as imposing a figure as he hopes.

It isn't a surprise, though. No one could become a Fatui Harbinger if they were scared of a little cat.

OR

Tartaglia is turned into a cat and he goes to Zhongli for help. It goes about as well as expected.

Ships: Zhongli/Childe

Notes: TOO ADORABLE FOR WORDS. This is just pure fluff I swear. Love how Childe is written and the interactions between the two are just ahhhh. A balm on the soul.

Melt by tanktrilby

“My name is Diluc,” he says. A scowl naturally furrows his brow, and Kaeya looks like he wants to laugh.

He’s looking at him through his lashes again, blue eyes teasing and warm. “Diluc,” he says. “A knight in overalls isn’t quite where I thought my preferences would lie, but here we are.”

(or: Kaeya loses his memories and makes some assumptions. Diluc can't honestly tell him that he's wrong.)

Ships: Diluc/Kaeya

Notes: As the summary says, Kaeya loses his memories. Diluc plays babysitter for plot reasons. Meanwhile, Kaeya freaks out and has an essential crisis because his instincts freak him out which = angst. Simultaneously, sort of love confessions? 

you are cordially invited by ktenologious

When the Traveler receives a mysterious invitation from a Snezhnayan businessman, they seek out help from the only Snezhnayan they are on good terms with. They decide it is a wonderful idea to go to this business party in the middle of the ocean because, well, what could be better entertainment than watching a Fatui Harbinger at work? It is too bad Childe couldn't come with them...

Meanwhile, the Tsaritsa needs someone to track down the source of a brand new drug at a party on a cruise; it just so happens that she has two Harbingers who specialize in causing chaos and sinking ships. Scaramouche is a sadist and loves this, and Tartaglia... Well, Tartaglia just wants to know why is he the one in the dress again.

Ships: Zhongli/Childe, sort of Diluc/Kaeya & Scaramouche/Childe

Notes: Features a crossdressing Childe and Kaeya for plot reasons. Funny as hell. Love Fatui dynamics/interactions. Highly recommend. Go read it. I’m serious. It’s so beautiful, I can’t. Also Zhongli is so love-sick and jealous, it’s hilarious.

The Road to Snezhnaya by paranoid_fridge

Everything's done and over. Now, Zhongli only needs to adjust to living like an ordinary mortal. Or that is what he thinks until a familiar face shows up in Liyue. Teucer comes looking for his brother who failed to return to Snezhnaya on the Fatui ships. And as Childe's declared "friend", Zhongli must help Teucer find him.

Or: Teucer drags Zhongli on a cross-country goose chase looking for Childe. Zhongli just happens to find a bit more along the way.

Ships: Zhongli/Childe

Notes: I have no words for this fic outside of the fact that it is clear that Teucer has the only functioning brain and should be Best Man because he obviously did all the work here. Features an oblivious Childe and overprotective Zhongli, plus bystander Kaeya that is getting allll of the gossip. And also the most destructive group of children ever.

basket of knives by oronine

“I just want to be loved,” Childe says to himself, to whoever is listening. “Is that too much to ask?”

They are on the roof once more, this time Childe’s foot touches the edge of the building as he daydreams of something that cannot be. The sky is blank and cloudy and perhaps Lumine fears it’ll all end when he takes a step.

“Not at all,” she says. It’s still the truth.

Contrary to popular belief, Childe hates his family but loves them all the same.

Ships: Zhongli/Childe

Notes: TW for suicidal ideation, suicide attempt, self-harm, depression, etc. Not a light read by any definition. Set in a modern AU, not in the genshin impact universe. Features a Childe that is Not Okay, good friend but also probably traumatized friend Lumine (and her brother Aether), and Zhongli. Family dynamic is messed up as hell and explores mental health quite well in my opinion. I’m not sure how healthy necessarily Childe’s relationships are but I think that’s a given considering the context and how derailed his mental health is in this fic. Definitely angst as heavy, made me tear up quite a bit. Read, but pay attention to the content/trigger warnings as it does get quite explicit.

Bane of All Evil by tzitzimeme

When Chongyun unintentionally offends Liyue's second most powerful adepti, he vows to mend the thorny relationship between Adeptus Xiao and human exorcists-- even though no one has succeeded in currying Xiao's favor for over a thousand years.

His best friend Xingqiu offers to come alone, mainly because he's worried about what kind of trouble Chongyun will run into. Along the way, they receive help from others: Xiangling packs them meals for their journeys, while Zhongli gives them advice on what demons to track.

Childe is just there because he thinks the whole thing is hilarious.

Ships: Chongyun/Xinqiu

Notes: JFKLFJS I LOVE THIS. I love Chongyun’s characterization and the interaction between all the characters. The dynamic between Chongyun, Xingqiu, and Xiangling are to die for. Also, this line: “Stuck-up Persnickety Bastard.” Random note but Xiao throws Chongyun off a balcony yet is also 100% a softie.

Talks about Nothing by tzitzimeme

In which Zhongli unlocks the Memory of Dust, only to find out:

1. Guizhong is 100% alive (just disembodied) within it, 2. Guizhong has been watching over him this whole time, and 3. Guizhong is very excited by the prospect of Zhongli getting a cute Snezhnayan boyfriend.

Ships: Zhongli/Childe, Venti/Xiao

Notes: The pure judgment that Guizhong unleashes on Zhongli (as well as her sass in general) is pure comedic gold. The dynamic between Xiao and Venti are also adorable. Meanwhile, Childe misunderstands and also just wants to know what the fuck is going on.

xi wangmu by tzitzimeme

Xiangling scales entire mountains to satisfy the palettes of her two pickiest customers.

(Or, two men who are emotionally stunted by their own immortality inadvertantly turn an overly enthusiastic chef into their messenger pigeon.)

Ships: Zhongli/Xiao (?)

Notes: Not sure if it reads romantic exactly, can definitely be read as platonic. The fic boils down to Xiangling trying to expose Xiao to variety because just eating plain almond tofu is a no no. Zhongli gives advice/uses Xiangling as a messenger pigeon. Backstory is explored!

Falling (Fallen) by asinglecrow

It’s only when Childe finds himself in front of Zhongli, a spear protruding from his stomach, that he thinks oh I might have fucked up.

Or: The worst (best) day of Childe's life.

Ships: Zhongli/Childe

Notes: Funny and lighthearted! Gets sort of NSFW with passing mention of mpreg but otherwise, it’s just pure humor/fluff. Get-together fic featuring deadpan dragon Zhongli and Childe that is just done with everything. 

the louvre by morisuke

Here in Liyue, the air is filled with the ocean, and the sun shines through the mountains like it’s flowing through a crack in the sky. Here in Liyue, there is a man with no wallet at a vending machine that is going to waste the rest of his day showing a stranger around their school campus for a pocket sized can of iced coffee.

It’s interesting here in Liyue, Childe thinks.

or

Where Childe flirts with a stranger at a campus vending machine.

Ships: Zhongli/Childe

Notes: Set in a modern/college AU. This is a relatively quiet, soft kind of story. Childe comes to Liyue because reasons and falls in love quietly. It’s more of a snippet of life type of fic that’s sweet and peaceful. Love the change that comes over Childe as he finds a home.

[theonetheycallhannah]

The Treatment of Captain Syverson-Chapter 20: Second Assist

Characters: Captain Logan “Sy” Syverson, Shane Benton (OFC), various other original supporting/secondary characters

Summary: Shane reunites with friends and family, hashes out some feelings, and gets real with Sy. Can their relationship survive her trauma? And the threat that still looms above them?

Romance and Smut Abound HERE!

Word Count: 4500

Warnings: Mention of rape, alcoholic beverages, violent imagery…feels out the butt.

Author’s Note: You guys are so splendid and beautiful! I can’t thank you enough for your support and encouragement to finish this piece. First, welcome to new readers! I know poor Henry’s injury and subsequent physiotherapy has driven some of you here, and while I’m sorry for him, I’m glad I can consider myself something of a pioneer in this particular genre and provide you some help for your newfound thirst. To my OG readers, it is to you I owe this entire work, parts written and incomplete, and I hope an eventual book deal. I mean to mention you in my acknowledgements, should this ever reach a willing publisher. You’ve inspired me so supremely that I cannot quantify it, even with the words I hold so dear.

Since my last chapter was posted, we’ve said a relieved goodbye to 2020 and a tentative hello to 2021. To be honest, this year has started out worse than last year. Lots of bad weather in my area this winter, my sister is currently on her way to a new life in another state, and my grandmother, the last grandparent I had, passed away in February. Those last two things have been especially difficult to shake off and recover from, both coming to fruition pretty suddenly. Amongst all that, I’ve been pretty distracted by my other fandoms, especially Marvel, and I’ve been reading a killer book series that I’m utterly in love with. (The Throne of Glass novels by Sarah J. Maas. 10/10 recommend.) But I knew I needed to get back into Shane and Sy’s story, especially given the new and rekindled interest in the subject matter. In all honesty, I’ve had most of it written for months. It’s just been a matter of finishing it off to set up the rest of the story.

I really hope you all enjoy Chapter 20, Second Assist, and would love your feedback and notes. You are all so important to this story, and your notes, reblogs, and comments are cherished. Thank you so much for reading! Love from Hannah!

Disclaimer: Unfortunately for me, Henry is not mine, le sigh, and all mention of him, his characters, any characters from his films, or his precious doggy, Kal, are strictly for transformative and recreational use. I neither ask for, nor accept payment for the work I post on Tumblr or AO3. Unbeta’d because this is for fun and escapism. This is an original work by me, Hannah. Please reblog if you wish to share. Please do not repost either in whole or part, as the work of anyone but myself. Thanks so much for reading!

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If you want to be notified when I post a new chapter or work, I’ll be happy to add you to my tag list! Stricken blogs are getting personal messages from me when a new chapter is uploaded because Tumblr’s faulty tagging system will not stand in the way of me delivering what the people want!(?) lol! (Although…their lackadaisical notification system might…sorry for that. I have no control. lol!)

X@X@X@X@X@X@X@X@X@X@X@

Shane woke in her warm bed, late morning sun streaming in through her sheer curtains, the heavier drapes parted to let in the light. She wished she'd remembered to close them before now. She really was not ready to be awake.

She was sore. Achy. Her sleep had been fitful and full of shadowy nightmares and muffled screams. Beyond that, she didn't try to remember images or events. She knew the general premise of the dreams. It would take a lot of time, effort, or a miracle to make her forget those traumas she'd been through in the last week. Not even forget. She knew she never would. But move on from them. Accept them. And heal from them…even that seemed a mighty obstacle. One she was not sure she could surmount.

Through the open bedroom door, she could hear Lynyrd Skynyrd and the clanging and sizzling of pans, and she could smell bacon and freshly brewed coffee. Sy had left the room, but had not, it seemed, gone far. She gingerly sat up, stood from the bed, and donned her robe as she walked out into the hall and down the corridor to the kitchen.

The sight before her warmed her heart. There was Sy. In only his boxers, daringly frying the notoriously dangerous breakfast meat. Upon her entry to the kitchen, she could also smell pancakes, and she thought syrup, as well. He seemed to be warming a bottle of the maple unction in a pot of hot water. He turned as she stepped on a squeaky floorboard, and grinned widely at her.

"Mornin' sunshine." And she was struck by the irony of someone with such a radiant smile calling her sunshine. Especially when she didn't feel much like beaming. But she couldn't help return the expression, even through her pain.

"Mornin' bear. Did you go to the store?" She knew she couldn't have any bacon in her fridge, and she doubted her eggs and milk were still good at this point. But she also couldn't think that he would leave her for any reason.

"Nah, some of the guys brought over some provisions. Matt worked on your car all night, too, and filled up the tank. It's as good as new. He and Nate brought ‘er over as well as the groceries. I just had ‘em get stuff I knew your family wouldn't be bringing later. They've had tons of food given to them this week, and they're ready to share. You should have seen your mom loading me down with sandwiches and chips and whatnot when I visited them."

"I still can't believe you met them. I really wanted to introduce you personally." Shane's face fell. She would never be able to get that back. She wanted to cry. Sy had poured her a cup of coffee and sat it in front of her with her favorite creamer.

"Darlin' I’m so sorry. I had to talk to them."

"I know." she sniffed. "I'm not mad. Not at you. Just…"she didn't want to say Elliott's name. "I'm disappointed that the experience was stolen from me." That so many things had been stolen from her. By that monster. There was no other way to describe him. Sy growled. As if he could read her mind. He really just knew her well enough and shared her thoughts.

"Well, don't worry, we'll have a nice dinner with them one of these days, and we can pretend. Sound good?"

"Yeah, and I can feign nervousness." she laughed.

"And I'll pretend too. That I'm scared to meet your dad." he chuckled. "What if he threatens me with his shotgun?"

"I'll pull the ol' 'Daddy, no, I loooooove him!' line, as I throw myself between you!"

"That oughta work." he laughed and kissed her on the forehead as he stepped toward the stove and flipped a pancake.

As they sat eating their late breakfast, Shane's mind wandered. Nothing had changed on the surface, but everything was different now. This cozily mundane breakfast with her boyfriend felt like an out of body experience. As delicious as it was, as wonderful and comforting as it should feel, her guard was up. Even through her amiable façade. She was not the person she was two weeks ago. She was not the same woman who said goodbye to Sy at the base. Maybe that was the real transformation. Maybe that was why nothing felt normal. It wasn't the world, but her own self coming back into it.

"Shane?" Sy asked, gently, but it felt like he was speaking through a megaphone directly into her ear. She was so startled, she nearly dropped the half full mug of coffee that was paused midway to her lips. A bit sloshed out onto the table and splashed her shirt.

"Shit!" she chided herself. It wasn't a big deal, but she felt stupid jumping at the sound of her own name.

Sy reached for the closest towel, hanging from the oven handle, grabbed it and started for her clothes with it. She stopped him. But she couldn't think about why the intimate act made her uncomfortable.

"No, don't, it's fine. These clothes have seen better days, anyway." She pulled the towel from him and began to mop up the small puddles of coffee around her plate.

Sy seemed to note the stains already present on the shirt, as if trying to divine their history. She was something of a messy eater, so the battle wounds of many a barbecue, spaghetti dinner, and hurried breakfast peppered the now off-white SATB club tee she'd gotten her second or third year in college choir. She thought back to a huge room with high ceilings. White, cinder block walls, flecked tile floors, a beautiful, glossy, black baby grand in front of a long whiteboard with black lines to resemble sheet music. She thought about the mnemonic device she'd learned to help her remember what notes appeared on each line, and in the spaces between them. She pondered the deeper meanings and implications of these devices. EGBDF…every good boy does fine. She thought about the "good boys" in her life. She knew many. Her dad, her brother Ethan, Sy, obviously, her many male coworkers and friends…and honestly they did far better than "fine." They were wonderful. But she was letting the "bad boys" she'd encountered dictate her mood. Permeate her psyche. Tear her down. She didn't want to be like this. Then FACE came to mind, and above their purpose of indicating the notes between the lines on the staff, they called her to action. To face these newly minted demons with all the strength she knew she possessed, and she too would "do fine." But as with almost all actions, this was easier said than done.

She felt a warm presence on her left hand which had paused it's torture of the now coffee-infused kitchen towel. Sy's hand was squeezing hers gently.

"Shane." he uttered, barely above a whisper this time. She looked at him through tears that she had not realized had formed. He continued.

"Shane, what can I do, darlin'? I'll do anything."

"Babe, you're doing everything you can, and more. This…this is all going to have to come from me. I…don't know when I'll be myself again…" she paused, tears streaming now. "I'm…I'm different."

"You're not though." he reached for her face, but she pulled away.

"I am, damn it! Sy, I was…" Words had power. And the one she was thinking of had more power than she thought was warranted. She knew that uttering it would take away it's power…and yet mustering the courage and strength to actually do so…seemed impossible. She took a deep breath, and disassociated herself from the statement, even though it was about her own past.

"I was raped." She refused to cry. She felt it all again. She had never said the words. She had never thought it necessary. Everyone understood. Sy, his friends, and she was sure her own loved ones had made the connection. But she knew she needed to say it now to drive home the points she was about to make.

Sy, looked at the table, nodding, not needing to be told in so many words something he already had surmised from the clear evidence. He remained silent. She went on.

"I love you, Sy. I have since the day we met, on one level or another, and I believe that I always will. But I…right now I can't be a proper girlfriend to you. I can't…be with you, touch you, be touched by you, in the way we used to be. In the way you deserve…and I don't know when…or even if…I ever will. Not that I don't want to. That's ALL I want in the world. To go back. To be the woman who fell in love with this…incredible man. To make love with you, but…I can't."

Sy's eyes were full of tears, their predecessors already descending his round cheeks and disappearing into his thick, dark beard.

"Sy, I don't want to lead you on and keep you tied to a relationship with no life in it. You deserve someone who's whole. Someone who can be a fully invested partner for you, and not this broken, damaged--"

"You stop that, Shane. I won't hear no more of this kinda talk. Y'hear? You're my girl. My woman. My person. No matter what. You gotta know I'd never leave ya just cuz you aren't ready for sex again. You don't think that I would, do ya?"

"Well, you went to Virginia…you took that job…knowing the distance it would put between us. Literally and figuratively."

"Biggest mistake of my life." Shane raised her eyebrows in surprise as Sy elaborated. "I couldn't focus on my classes without wishing you were there. Wishing I could team up with you for discussions and hand to hand combat training…that thought got me a little too excited, if you catch my drift." He smirked, pulling a sheepish smile from Shane. "Then in that forest. I dreamt about you every night. I thought of you constantly. I could barely breath sometimes, I missed ya so damned much. I was an idiot. I was insane to think that I needed anything other than you. Any MORE. There IS no more. You're it. You're the MOST! The most important thing in my life."

The declaration hung like vapors in the air, more felt than seen. Tangible yet ethereal.

"And when I found out that you were missing…I was…well, I think I looked like death…and not warmed over. You can ask the program director I met with after I got the news. She could tell I was just sick over it. And as I thought about it on the way home, pieced things together, started thinking about who'd taken you, I got murderous. Shane, I have been in dozens of battles, skirmishes, firefights, you name it. War. But…the sheer bloodlust I felt thinking about what you could be going through…I've never experienced anything like it. Everything was red. Everything. For days. Until I saw you, alive. And then it went red again when I saw the fear and damage on your face." she could tell he was doing his best not to talk about the farmhouse and that basement, but she still flashed back to the moments before and after his appearance there. The moments when she simultaneously prayed to live and hoped to die.

"You don't owe me anything, Shane. I just want you in my life, and I don't care what your presence looks like. Romantic, platonic, or somewhere in between. I'm here for you. And I wouldn't have it any other way."

Shane felt the urge to wrap her arms around her boyfriend, but could not seem to move more than one arm to place her other hand on top of his. She hoped the gratitude and love behind the small, but heartfelt gesture landed. It was all she had in that moment, no matter how abundant her affection.

~~~~~~~~~~

Shane's family's arrival was a complete blur to her. It was joyous, tearful, and the happiest she'd been in a long time. The moment she opened the front door for them, she was surrounded, engulfed with hugs from her parents and siblings. They stood in their affectionate huddle for several moments before Peg waved Sy over with marked insistence. He'd been standing by, observing happily, but not wanting to intrude on the familial reunion.

When they finally dispersed, John asked the two younger men to help him bring in groceries. The women headed into Shane's bedroom for a more private setting in which to talk. Shane filled her mother and sister in the best she could given the rawness of the wounds left on her mind by the events.

She leaned against the headboard cuddling with Gabby while her mom rubbed her feet. She had insisted on doing this thing that had always comforted her children, and made them feel much better when they were younger.

"Well, I'm very proud of you, pumpkin." The girls both looked at their mother, who rather uncharacteristically hadn't spoken in some time. Shane was nonplussed. Peg elaborated.

"You survived something that many women don't. You're talking about it now, which even more women don't. You may think you're broken, but you're just a tree damaged by a storm, but standing stronger than ever." Trust her mom to lay such wisdom on her. When she felt like giving up. When she just wanted pity. When she could only see defeat. Her mother had always found a way to encourage and buoy her and show her the victory.

"Mom's right." Gabby affirmed, and it was Peg's turn to be nonplussed, as the two women, though similar in so many ways, never seemed to see eye to eye. "It's true. Shane I've seen a lot of women come into the clinic in shoes very much like yours. And trust me…some of them…they don't make it to this point. You've got a long way to go before you're fully recovered, don't get me wrong, but you'll get there. You have us. And you have Sy."

"And then there's Sy." She diverted. "How am I supposed to plan any sort of future with him when…" She looked at her mom, and hesitated. Peg rolled her eyes.

"Shane, I know what the two of you get up to when you're alone. You don't have to be shy with me."

"Still…" she took a breath and spoke. "When I can't bring myself to…sleep with him?"

"Look at him, you're kidding, right?" Gabby chided, insensitively, but recanted at the pained expression on Shane's face. "Sorry, sis. Trying to lighten the mood a touch. Too soon. But seriously, I don't think this reluctance you feel will be permanent."

"And even if it is," Peg took over, "that man is out-of-his-mind in love with you, Shaney." She kissed Shane's toe before putting a sock on her foot. "He almost seems to worship you. Now, you know how I feel about using that term outside of religious context, but that is exactly the kind of love I want for you. Devout, and unconditional."

"But, mom, I can't--"

"Did you hear me? I said 'unconditional,' sweetie." Peg interrupted. "No matter what. No matter the obstacle. No matter the distance. No matter the circumstances. Love unwavering. That's what Sy has for you. I've seen it in him. Trust the momma."

The insistence her mother placed on trust had always ruffled Shane's feathers. Gabby's too, who she could feel stiffen slightly beside her. But Shane, for once, really wanted to trust her mother, hoping against hope that she was right. And that she, herself  wouldn't screw up the best relationship she had ever been in or was likely to ever be in again.

The girls had begun talking about some of the coworkers who'd brought food in the past week, and Peg couldn't resist remarking on the character of her favorites and judging the ones she didn't care for…oddly enough, getting more or less, the correct measure of them, as Shane saw it.

After what must have been an hour from the time they'd arrived, they heard a knock on the slightly ajar bedroom door. John poked his head in.

"Ladies, we've put a casserole in the oven, and completed various manly projects around the house--"

"Oh, daddy, what projects?" She cringed. She hated that the men had felt the need to "fix" things.

"Babe, your guest bathroom had not one, but two leaky faucets, your kitchen table seemed to be more of a teeter-totter, and half the light bulbs in the living room were out. Among other tiny things. You're welcome." he smirked his crooked smirk so similar to her own, and she returned it as if he was looking in a mirror.

"Thanks, dad."

"Anyway, lunch is almost ready. So, when you've finished your confab, let's eat."

Dinner passed amiably, Shane found a reserve within herself to allow some quasi-normal behavior, as long as you didn’t look too closely. She was talking animatedly with her siblings, making their parents and Sy laugh riotously. Shane noticed some odd looks passing between Sy and her father, but chalked it up to paranoia. She wished at least Gabby and Ethan could stay, but Heather would be over soon, and she deserved her own dedicated time. Shane wanted to give that to her.

She said her farewells to her family with promises to visit them the next day, and at least one more time before her siblings went back home, if she could work it out.

Sy was so wonderful the whole time. Standing by her, a hand resting lightly on her shoulder as they waved goodbye to the departing vehicle. He made her feel so safe. They went into the kitchen and cleaned up from lunch. Well, Sy cleaned. Shane was texting Heather about when she'd be over.

"Heather says she'll be here in about a half hour. She's picking up wine and pizza." Shane told Sy without looking up from her phone. She could see out of the corner of her eye, though, that he had just closed the dishwasher and was selecting a cycle.

"Sounds great. Do you want me to get out of here? Give you guys some time, one on one?" He asked as he dried his hands, wet from preparing dishes for the machine.

She thought about it, and shuddered. She played a scene in her head that startled her. In her mind's eye, she saw Sy leave and then moments later heard a knock on the door. Presuming it was Heather, she opened the door with abandon, only to see Elliott standing there under a flickering porch light, smirking maliciously at her and ready to overpower and abduct her again. She shook the thought from her head, but remained uneasy as she answered his question.

"Uh, no. Thanks. I'm sure she'll want to talk to both of us. She likes you." Shane grinned softly at Sy in an attempt to mask her trepidation over the thought of him leaving her alone for any period of time. She thought it had worked.

"Okay, well, whatever you think, sunshine. I don't wanna get in the way." He was wiping down the countertops. She felt so impossibly full of love for him, she was starting to wonder how she hadn't yet burst with it. She couldn't bear the thought of holding him back from a fulfilling relationship. He deserved everything she couldn't give him right now. And she knew she should make him leave her. Cut him loose. But she was, as she'd been since she'd met him, a weak woman. She couldn't stand the thought of being without him. Of him no longer being hers. And somehow worse, of not being his, herself. She would always need him for so many reasons, not least of which being her love for him. Maybe one day, she'd recover from this trauma, and be able to be who he deserved. To give him what he needed.

"You're never in the way, bear." She walked up behind him, wrapped her arms around his middle and squeezed him as tight as she could. He placed a loving hand over hers, sighing and smiling, though she had no visual proof of the latter. It was just a feeling.

Heather's greeting was no less exuberant than that of Shane's family, but it was more joyful and less emotional, even though she was immensely relieved to see her best friend after so long. They talked as if no time had passed, and Shane mustered up the dregs of her former self to have one more interaction for the day. Thank God it was Heather and not someone who would require more. She wouldn't have it to give.

"I am so glad you're okay, Shane! Things around the clinic have been bleak as fuck. Susan is loosing her mind, Anita is beside herself with concern, and the rest of us just plain ol' miss the hell out of you. And not just because of all of the overtime everyone has been pulling to get your patients seen."

"Oh, God, I'm so sorry! I didn't realize…wow, I'm awful. I didn't even think---"

"That you'd be missed? Think again, sister. The place would fall apart if you ever really left. But don't feel guilty. It's the least everyone can do, and they've all said it themselves. We all love you, and know that you'd do the same for any of us if you could at all. Hopefully you won't have to, though!"

Shane nodded, eyes wide in agreement. She wouldn't wish the last week of her life on her worst enemy. On the worst person in the world. Except maybe the people responsible. Tit for tat.

"Well, I'm sorry my absence has caused extra work for all of you." Shane looked into the deep glass of Chardonnay Sy had poured her from the bottle Heather had brought. She felt about as small as the air bubble making it's way up the sloping curve of the stemless vessel. She felt a guilt that she knew was fully void of logic. It made no sense for her to feel guilt for being kidnapped. But she had always had this notion, this nagging voice in her head that told her that her misfortunes were a direct result of her decisions. That she'd inadvertently stepped on the butterfly that resulted in the monsoon she was currently experiencing, and whatever cataclysmic events she would face next.

"Why in God's name are you apologizing for this, Shay?" Heather's tone was kind, but still mildly scolding.

"If I'd never been with Elliott, none of this would have--"

"Bitch, are you a fortune teller?"

"No, but--"

"Soothsayer?"

"No."

"Time traveler?"

"I wish!" Shane chuckled. But she really did wish.

"Have you any real and proven success at consistently predicting the future?"

"I don't, but--"

"No. No buts. No howevers. You had no idea what becoming involved with Elliott could have done. Were there signs, sure. But you can't look on the past as a rubric to judge the quality of your decisions. You know that. You can only learn from your mistakes. And you have."

"Heather's right, sunshine. You really have learned. You look for Elliott's behaviors in mine and shut me down quick if you see 'em. You're not going to let yourself go down that road again. And I'm proud of you for it."

Shane silently worried her wine glass. It was hard to argue with such truth. But it was hard to agree when her own feelings were in such stark opposition. So she did neither.

"Well, I've preached my sermon for the day." she laughed. "I've taken up enough of your time. Oh, your phone. It's in my purse. I think it's fully charged, but I turned it off."

Shane thanked her friend, then Heather hugged them both and took her leave.

"Y'okay, bug?" Sy asked her after what she surmised was several minutes of silence. Minutes she didn't notice as they passed.

"Mmm…" she trailed off.

"Can I do something for ya?" And she really thought about the question. He could probably do a lot of things for her. He could make love to her until she felt whole again, even if it hurt her at first. Not an ideal option. He could probably get them both some new identities and enough money to spirit her away to somewhere her past wouldn't follow. If she became someone new, literally, would she have to bring that old baggage, those old scars, with her? Again, suboptimal. But he could definitely take the source of all grief and turmoil in her life far into the Missouri back country, somewhere not even the hunters would venture, some fallow field or forgotten cistern, and end him. Snuff out his spark of life like a candle caught in a tornado. Spill a fatal amount of his monstrous blood onto the unforgiving earth and send him to the Hell to which he was undoubtedly destined. But did she want that? Did she want another soul as a scar on that of the man she so deeply cherished? He'd say it was worth it. He'd say he'd take a thousand more for her. A million. That was Sy.

"Nothing comes to mind." She lied. And he knew it was a lie, but didn't push it. She was so grateful that he respected her, not for the lie itself, but for the reason she wasn't giving him the whole truth just now.

His phone went off and he picked it up as he stood from his seat at the table. She could only hear that it was Matt, the guy she thought she understood had the car place, before she heard tension in Sy's voice. Even from the next room, she could tell something was wrong, though he was talking too quietly for her to make out words.

She heard him suddenly shout a stream of profanities that he rarely said at all around her, at least, let alone together. There was a bang, and the walls of her kitchen quaked like the tectonic plates beneath them were shifting.

Sy walked back in, his face was red, as were his knuckles. He was shaking an injury out of his hand.

"What's wrong?" she asked, deep concern at his appearance and demeanor, suddenly ominous.

"I need to fix your wall in there." he grumbled, evading, without success. She'd be doing therapy on his hand, next.

"What's really wrong?" she repeated, sternly.

"That was Matt. Elliott's…escaped, somehow. He's in the wind."

Shane's heart became so heavy, she could almost feel it smashing through the kitchen floor and burying itself deep in the cement floor of her basement.

"Oh, God! No! What if he goes to the police!?"

"Fuck that, I'm more concerned about him coming after you!"

The two stared, faces full of equal measures of concern for the other.

Up Next: Chapter 21-Patient Education

[code-otome-game]

Completed otome games, my thoughts, along with my fav characters (last updated: August 22nd 2021)

1. Code Realize - August 2021

Saint-Germain instantly caught my eye, along with Lupin ofc. I was curious about Impey but my friend who lent me her collection of otome games said he was shit. Code Realize was my reintroduction to otome games, and plummeted me into otome hell once more. As soon as I saw Herlock Sholmes, I wanted him as a route, and loved his Future Blessings route.

Saint Germain was my absolute favourite, and his route hurt me in all the right ways. His VA was amazing at conveying the emotion behind certain scenes.

2. Café Enchanté - August 2021

After completing Code Realize, I felt a little lost and didn't know what game to play next. I figured after the pain of some of the stuff in Code Realize, I'd go for something I thought would be a little more fun and a little lighter. Cafe Enchante was next on my list. I was instantly drawn to Misyr and Il, with Il being my first route. I absolutely loved Il, and was traumatized from having my fav boy be the one who was hurt the most again. Although, Misyr is definitely a top contender for most hurt fav as well...

3. Piofiore - August 2021

I continued on with Piofiore right after Cafe Enchante, and instantly knew I was interested in Dante and Yang. I went with Dante first, and was absolutely enamored by him. I was absolutely heartbroken to find out that I didn't get his best ending at first, and contemplated not playing the game for a while. But I decided against it and carried on, using a guide this time. I didn't think anyone else would surpass him in my mind, but boy was I wrong. I quickly fell in love with Yang once I started his route, and his route was the first to make me feel butterflies again in years since I played my last otome game.

However, after playing through all the routes and getting to the finale, I absolutely fell in love with Henri, and I'm honestly shocked that Nicola has left such an impression on me considering I didn't think much of him right after his route. Now it's hard *not* to think about him. But overall, I love all the men pretty equally. I'm super excited for 1926.

4. Collar x Malice - August 2021

I was definitely curious about this one and was tempted to start it multiple times when choosing which game to play next, however I put it off because I didn't like the protagonist being a cop.

The characters are honestly all super loveable, and I think I love them all a bit more equally then I do the Piofiore guys. I was surprised Saeki wasn't a route, until while I was playing Kei or Shiraishi's route when my friend spoiled he was Adonis' leader.

I fell in love with all the characters quite gradually through their stories, with the exception of Shiraishi. I knew he'd be the one I was the most curious and interested in. I was so excited when I finally unlocked his route, and I absolutely loved every single bit of the early half of it. His comments and interactions were hilarious, he was adorable *and* hot.... and he loves cats. What the hell more could I want from a guy? He makes me want to introduce him to my own cats and also makes me want to do mundane and sweet things with him just because he's so sweet and I love him.

I was absolutely heartbroken at his "best" ending, and thinking about his tragic ending hurts my heart. I legitimately only want the best for this man- I only want him to be happy and healthy and not confined to some stupid prison or Adonis...

It also feels strange, but I think I love him best *before* he got a little soft with the protagonist? His quick retorts and harsh comments were hilarious and I loved that so much about him, so I was a bit sad when he grew a bit soft later on.

At the time of writing these past 4 entries, CxM is the latest game I've played, so Shiraishi's story is still super fresh in my mind. I was as obsessed with most of the other men mentioned above as I am with him right now. I'm sure the following entries will contain more love-ramblings like this as I complete more games and add them to the list.

5. Amnesia: Memories - August/September 2021

Toma! Toma! Toma!!!

My first experience with ✨ the cage ✨. I went with Ikki at first, got his normal ending (thaT SHIT WAS SO SAD WTF ;-;) and then went back with a walkthrough for his good ending. But... his route was kinda underwhelming tbh. I liked it as I played it, but looking back now... it really was quite underwhelming. So was Shin's route, who I played after Toma. I was interested in who the culprit was, and was shocked with the reveal tbh. Buuut after playing Toma's route... it was understandable. Although I really wish that Shin's route had more affection in it... it felt more like a mystery with a little bit of romance rather then an otome game.

I played Toma's route after Ikki's, and omfg... Toma was truly an unexpected fav. Hated his good ending tho, idfk why you would be ok with just returning to normal after all of that... but whatever. I would willingly go in that cage I s2g. I LOVED his eyes too! When he gets dark and super possessive, those eyes are just... UGH. Yes please. ❤

I skipped the entirety of Kent's route because I really just don't give a fuck about him. Hes absolutely not my type. I felt bad skipping it, but... in the end I don't really care.

Ukyo was also an unexpected fav- I wad super curious about his route and suspected that all of the "interesting" and bad stuff that I had heard about would happen during his route buuuut... nope. Nothing of the sort. He was so damn sweet, but I will say that uh... insane side of him is kinda hot too. 👀 but omg, the fact that he's a photographer AND so damn dedicated to you and sweet is just... ugh. My heart. Ukyo and Toma definitely became my favs for this game, and I think this is the first time where my first route didn't end up being one of my favourites.

I love how sharp Toma is as well! That he knows so much about you and can easily find out things and such... but also- I really like how dedicated and caring Ukyo is. He's so protective and adorable! I really did feel bad for him during his route. I haven't gotten his normal ending yet, but the title of it is so fucking sad and I don't know if I even wanna go for it.

"Do you know Ukyo?"

6. Bustafellows - September 2021

Honestly, when I started playing Bustafellows I didnt expect to like many characters, if any at all. None of them were particularly appealing to me, at least visually... however, as I played the game, I was drawn to Shu and Mozu, as I found Shu to be the most attractive one of the bunch, and Mozu was interesting to me as a coroner. However, the first character I ended up with was... Crow. I was honestly a little surprised, but didn't care too much. I didn't know who I wanted to go with first, and honestly, as the common route progressed... I found myself liking Crow more.

Crow was the one I liked the least out of everyone, at least visually at first. I really didn't like his hair lmao. But as I read the common route, he really grew on me, and I couldn't help but be sweet to him, so ofc I ended up with his route first... and god, I really love him. He's so stupid and adorable. Like seriously.

I went with whoever the game would give me after Crow, and it gave me Helvetica. With Crow, I really loved his character, but didn't care much for his story. It was the opposite for Helvetica. I enjoyed his story a ton, but not his character. I then carried on with Shu, who I loved entirely. Both his character and story was really really good, and his bad ending... phew. Damn dude.

Mozu came after, and I honestly have mixed feelings about his route. I feel like there really needed to be more romance between him and the MC, but the end of his route where he finds his sister is.... oof. I literally went "thats rough buddy" in my head lmao. I felt so bad for him.

I liked Limbo a lot more then I thought I would as well! He was super adorable and sweet, and the story was pretty good too, so I really enjoyed his route. But overall, I believe Shu and Crow are my favs this time around. I can't believe I didn't like Mozu as much as I thought I would! But I feel like I would have liked him a shitton more if there was more to his route then there was.... smh.

Nightshade - September 2021

I almost immediately jumped right into Nightshade, although with doubts of enjoying it in my mind, as I wasnt in the mood for a historical japan setting. However! I loved the characters, and the story! By the end of it, I was thoroughly angry with the antagonists for hurting my BOYS like that...

The first one I went for was Kuroyuki, who I LOVED. I felt a little bit confused throughout his route, but I still quite enjoyed it. A sweet yandere. Babey boy. I love him.

Next was Chojiro, and oooohhhhh boy.... yeah. That was a little rough. BUT I feel like the story was very well suited for him!!! After that I went with Goemon, who was SO SWEET. For a moment, the "plot twist" had me, but then I realized there was no way he was wasn't trying to trick his old clan/the council.

Hanzo was second last, and definitely an unexpected fav! I didnt find him very attractive at first, but seeing him more and more throughout the routes had him growing on me. And I LOVED him! But... I don't like Ieyasu's treatment towards the end of the route; ordering Hanzo to kill the MC after making us thoroughly believe he was a kind man in every other route.... sigh. But I'm happy that he was able to take just the MC's sash instead of her head. I do like that he also told Hanzo to "go get a wife and come back" hehe.

GOD that scene in the cave with Hanzo where youre both naked... YES. And his hair when its wet!!! Hes so adorable AND hot at the same time???? I love Hanzo. Tbh, I love all of them.

Gekka was the last one I did, but I wish I reversed Hanzo/Gekka's positions. Cause I really, *really* didnt like ending on such a sad ending.... dear god. I really thought I got the bad end or something for a hot minute there. Then Gekka comes in! Ahhhh, honestly I didn't like him much at all at first which is why I saved him for last, but his route.... FUCK man. His route was heart wrenching. And he's so damn sweet. I still don't understand how/why he doesn't try to kill the MC in the other routes after the "protection" "curse" is lifted but whatever. Still, the ending... dear god. And all of their graves being dug up... the box of everyone's hair... jesus christ that was morbid. Even that made me mad. I didnt care much for the blonde haired kid who died first, but everyone else after that had such a good part to the story...but I wonder why Kuroyuki lived in every route?

Either way, Nightshade was a lot better then I thought it would be! I loved it!!! I honestly might go back soon and replay Kuroyuki's route now that I know whats going on and I know the characters.... also wanna replay Hanzo's route! Babey ❤

[shame-kink]

ok i actually unfurled my “receipt” talons but this person is an incest apologist and you should fucking block them. shit under the cut

ok i went to check them bc i basically go to check *everyone* now (regaurdless of if their points are good or bad. like having a shit awful opinion is inherently suspicious -duh- but i’ve been around the rodeo enough to know that holding people i agree with to high standards is actually fucking reasonable bc without it you get the fucking ocean of incest wierdos who giggle and traipse through the transgender aisle at the supermarket) and like. one of the first things i *see* (without having to like. search.) is:

and like. this sets off alarms immediately bc this person is reacting this dramatically to a claim that like. not all, not most, but *some* kinks are “disgusting”. i’m pretty sure even legends of the “kink” world would still agree that, yes, *some* kinks are disgusting. its not that hot a take. And while i *get* that they’re trying to say that whatever kinks this person is alluding to in particular aren’t disgusting, WELL, UM, LETS JUST actually i took a look further down the blog at this point in the “””””investigation”””””” and like 

i already left commentary in the thing itself. like i do *get* it, the fact that stardew valley is trying to be inclusive by having all the romance options be available to everyone, or fucking fallout 4 is trying to be woke pogchamp by letting you “romance” as many people as you want, while simultaneously never fucking once giving lip service to the *existence* of us homos, is in fact actually fairly dehumanizing (though my reaction to such is based almost entirely in how much goodwill i have towards the developers, stardew valley dev yer ok and its not that big a deal, monster prom i hate your explanation that you used in marketing years ago when you just could’ve said that you won’t have any gender specific romance options and left it at that but yer Alright, fallout 4 die in a hole for literally giving the protagonist a requited happy suburban straight marriage and yet having tons of journos at the time praising you for being progressive and queer-friendly die die die die in a hole), but good fucking god OP of this not all stories centering solely around bi/pan/mspec women are doing that *for male gaze* and phrasing it like THAT is effectively repeating the “available to men” rhetoric that treats bi women like god damn grocery store zucchini FUCKING *ANYWAYS* BACK TO THE INCEST SHIT

ok so at this point i just search incest on the blog. its super easy as a way to vet people since theres a lot more people around in the same spaces i wind up in who are willing to offhandedly support *that* than some of the other pervert shit (probably because defending the fetishization of children or dogs is a angrier bees nest than even the bigger wierdos are willing to swing at lmao). 

i don’t have much to say about this one i just think the way the person frames their laughing about all this is fucking weird. the screenshots kinda confusing (also terrible quality sorry) but everything about “tumblr is the funniest etc etc” is screenshots, and unless i’m *completely* misunderstanding the order of operations here Beaky is the transmasc exclusionist (??? exclusionist against what. excluding transmascs???? are they a trans masc who excludes???? what) and the pink anime girl bitch is the “trans lesbian (why are you bringing up the persons orientation unless yer taking this as some sorta attack on trans women thinkingemoji) who did incest roleplay with her partner” . its framed fucking weird and also yeah sure “calling for the death of a trans lesbian” is when someone says that a proudly, shamelessly incest glorifier should be put on a “block/kill list” (noteworthy thing that totally isn’t a turn of phrase born out of frustration with this shit- ALSO I SHOULD ADD THAT I HAVE NO CLUE WHO ANY OF THE INVOLVED ARE SO WHILE I OBVIOUSLY CONDEMN THE BROTHERFUCKER I DO *NOT* NECESSARILY ENDORSE THE OTHER PERSON LMAO) 

ok now these are actually just acting like being against the fetishization of incest is puritanical

AND LIKE WHAT IN THE GOD DAMN IS THIS, THE OP GOES AT LENGTH TO SAY THAT THE CALLED OUT PERSON *APPROVES OF “ADULT, CONSENTING” INCEST* AND THE REPLY CGFORESKIN IS AGREEING WITH IS TALKING ABOUT THIS BEING MORE ‘FRAMING ALL TRANS WOMEN AS PEDOPHILES’ SLANDER. i don’t even know if the OP of that is operating in good faith or not but the fact that they’re all perfectly fine with completely skipping over incest is cartoonish. and given the rest of this shit i’m not giving them the benefit of the doubt. 

honestly just doing this because between here and my nsfw twitter experience theres way, way, WAYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY too many people in “progressive, trustworthy, we’re all a bunch of solidarity-loving queer folkz” spheres that seem way too comfortable cozying up to fetishes that like- kinda are actually inherently bad.