#also if you think some of these were low hanging fruit its because they are 👍 i was in the trenches here digging through songs

[dearmahiru-archive]

waaaa thank you so much for this question that i definitely didn't take three months to answer. i totally didn't overcomplicate this very simple question for myself and ending up with completely different songs each list! no siree!! (and i totally didn't lose the og ask </3)

sarcasm aside—even though the question didn't specify these would be official covers i went into the list with that mindset, so i narrow it down to strictly vocaloid songs (no utaite or general jpn songs!), the song must be consistent with the prisoner's style (kotoko wouldn't sing a sappy love ballad, yuno isn't doing a screamo), and no producer doubles!

alts are songs that don't fit these rules / aren't my first pick but i still wanted to mention :3c

01. Haruka ─ First Train and Kafka

Though I’ve nothing but things I want to say, I’m sorry that nothing comes out I’ve become a poisonous bug, it isn’t that interesting though

Since my frightened family isn’t even here, I look down upon the calm of the city alone That hair of yours that swayed in the first summer’s wind came to mind

Alt: I Was Human

02. Yuno ─ Goodbye, Ms. Flower Thief

I've been dreaming a dream within a dream, within a dream Seaside, on the seaside, a kitten's sweet demise...

While I smoke a cigarette Until morning comes, hold me, hold me...

Alt: I Think I'm Falling Inlove With My Teacher

03. Fuuta ─ Idola No Circus

Come, let’s dance all night in our naked bodies We know, we know your true nature Again putting on a fake face You’re just like a pierrot

Come on up to the stage! You knew, didn't you? You’re also an accomplice

Alt: Rinne

04. Mu ─ Ikanaide

"It's nothing," I kept to myself. Truth is, I wanted to stop those footsteps for a moment, But you're gliding forward with such quick steps And I'm simply watching

You fade out of sight, far, far away, leaving me behind. Completely. Once again, the night blurs itself out, Don't cry, just don't cry

Alt: FAILURE GIRL

05. Shidou ─ Shoujo Fuzei

Again, she told a lie and felt relieved with perfectly trimmed bangs, she said, "Come here, and accompany me to hell."

Chop it up, this body doesn’t feel anything like pain Unfortunately, delusion is something that everyone harbors

06. Mahiru ─ Love of Love By Love For Love

A spider lily struggling to live, A heart writhing with maggots With your voice and your smile My pulse began beating anew

That day, I fell in love with love With time, I killed that love, killed it, killed it

Alt: Hurry To The Night

07. Kazui ─ Cutlery

The cutlery is rusted, as if it has been used often. I want you to end it in the worst case...

Before I get sick of you, I’ll act selfishly without hesitating even if I’ll end up losing you.

Alt: Charles / Delusion Girl / Quiet Room

08. Amane ─ Milk Crown On Sonnetica

Can't do it, such a talent isn't sold in any store Even God, who art in Heaven, reduces such a junk to a heirloom?

You ask "Wait, why is it that you beg for forgiveness in such a miserable manner?" This was surprisingly silly - so much that I just stood still and cried

09. Mikoto ─ Bitter Choco Decoration

I try not to forget to add in a few light-hearted jokes and a touch of lip service I try to smile and show off my charisma whenever I can

I try not to pointlessly expose myself, Not to talk about myself, not to understand myself But I try not to be a bit too silent, To be laughed at rather than to make people laugh

010. Kotoko ─ Shama

A femme fatale prisoner dressed in stripes Gulps down the juice squeezed from the crowd Every night, drunkenly, she plays with fire, and hangs herself When the wax figure of a little girl melts

If you affirm your shallowness Then where’s my ground to stand on? "An annoying glass and foundation Hang your tongue out, just like a dog."

[whileyoureinschoolidothisallday]

Fixing MHA's Ending So It Follows Through With Its Core Themes (And It Basically Fixes Itself)

I don't like retconning at the best of times, but turning what started as essentially a Hope focused narrative into a "realistic" tragedy at the very last second is some wild work.

So I'm gonna do what I do best as a fic writer and fix it!!!!!

The Summary

So, I'm pretty sure all of us were on mostly the same page up until the very last panels of the Shigaraki fight (Having AFO being just "born evil" was probably the start of things not being great, but I'm willing to let that slide because it doesn't really effect the overall function of the story that much). Once that and the epilogue started is where I mostly saw people being like ????????? to a lot of choices, so I'm going to focus on those two sections only.

We're gonna be rewriting:

-The deaths of the Villains + Kurogiri (obvs)

-The overall post-War actions and reactions

-The continued existence of the Commission and the Hero Rankings

-Hawk's fate

-Spinner's fate

-A liiiiitle tweak to Chisaki's fate

-Slight tweaks to the Todorokis

-and finally What to DO with the Villains + Kurogiri now that they're alive

And we'll be starting with...

Toga

Now for a battle that was so beautiful, this really did end up completely falling apart.

I'm not gonna justify every single Villain Rescue I do, but Toga's really comes down to one simple reason for me:

Her bullies literally wanted her to die as atonement.

You don't...typically make your character's fate agree with their bullies or abusers (otherwise???? why are you explicitly portraying them as bullies and abusers to the audience if you want us to ultimately agree with them?????)

Throughout most of the story prior to this, Hori made it a staple in the show that dying for the cause, hurting yourself for the cause, martyring yourself or otherwise telling someone to kill themselves for the cause is a vile thing to do. So, it makes ZERO sense why he would suddenly retcon this at such a critical moment, especially since he already set the stage for it to be wrong in the first place.

(also does anyone also think it was weird/creepy that Hori LITERALLY has her do this with Twice and she very explicitly says "Don't be stupid I don't have to give all of my blood away"? No? Just me?)

Everything happens the same, she still thinks she's sacrificing herself, "If only, if only", blah blah blah

AND THEN...

Hawks

This is such low-hanging fruit plot-wise it actually feels offensive that it went nowhere

Nothing happens with Hawks. We all say it, fans and non-fans alike. He is wasted potential incarnate. His story is a circle and it so easily did not have to be that way because of one simple writing decision:

Hawks and Toga share a blood type.

Up until now, it really did seem like Hawks learned nothing from Jin's death. The first thing he says when he sees the clones is, "We have to kill them now!" But then, picture him still battered and broken from his fight with AFO, wingless, but there is still SOMETHING he can do to save someone's life.

And he puts the needle in his arm instead, and before she can question it, he tells her Jin would want her to live. He's not gonna make the same mistake twice.

(I also think it'd be nice if he said something like how lucky she is, to really go full circle with the Jin story, but I'm not trying dialogue here lol)

And that leads us to...

Shigaraki (and Kurogiri!)

This is a double feature because with the way I'm doing it, I can't save one without the other.

So, something that happens during this and is super anti-climactic and seemingly pointless is Midoriya losing his hands. He gets em back in like 2 seconds, because Eri gives him a surprise rewind almost immediately after. The actual point of it was just to show the brand new rule that physical damage that happens in the vestige world also happens in the real world, so that killing Shigaraki a few chapters later would still make sense.

We're gonna get rid of that rule entirely and just say that Midoriya does not lose his actual arms in the fight, and psychological damage in a ghost world does not reflect physically in reality (or idk. If you DO want that to happen, then just say the embers of the vestiges protected him one last time or something).

And because he doesn't lose his arms, Eri still has a surprise rewind to use.

But before we get to that, we actually have to save Shigaraki. So, here's the super complicated rescue rewrite I came up with. Ready?

Kicking AFO out of his brain and giving him back full control over his body simply does not kill him.

That's it!!!! That's really all that needed to happen!! It was a very conscious choice to make that kill him! It's actually more work and details to kill Shigaraki than it is to save him!! Hori already went out of his way to say that Nana's vestige protected him so that he wasn't completely swallowed by AFO, just so he could say goodbye before fading away anyway. What if, considering the fact that hatred of Nana is what damned him, love FROM Nana actually just plain ol saves him? Full stop? We come full circle. It would make it a fantastic mirror to the Todoroki fight and solidify the theme that love from your/a family, even a broken one, will save you!!

And then further in the background, Bakugou doesn't randomly kill (?????? Even after reading it again I'm still really confused about how Kurogiri dies. I think this is what happens?????) Kurogiri, and instead starts to lose control like they feared. But then, refusing to give up on him, Aizawa hits him with the now-available Rewind Juice and it finally, finally stabilizes his mind for good.

The day is saved.

And that just leaves...

Touya

Unfortunately my stupid husband can't stop trying to kill himself for 2 seconds despite my best efforts to convince him otherwise, so there's really nothing I can do about the extent of his injuries

However, there's LOTS I can do about the way we're treating said injuries! =D

First of all, because Touya is my favorite, I do wanna allow myself the space to briefly rant about how his entire situation was handled because brother. first of all. It's so incredibly obvious that he was supposed to die on the battlefield with his comrades. That man had no fuckin eyeballs by the end of that fight, bffr. And then it was like Hori remembered the thing about the noodles and was like 'oh shit I better at least wrap that up lol' so he brought him back--eyeballs and TEARDUCTS magically intact btw so naturally the audience with reading comprehension was like 'oh he's healing somehow I guess'--just to get that specific moment on the books (and maybe just to draw Touya in his Batman Who Laughs era because I mean he does look pretty sick in the tank) and then turned around and killed him again. With no explanation what the random functioning tearducts and magical regrowth of eyeballs was about.

Like...my guy, you ain't gotta do all that. Again, it's so much harder and more complicated to kill him than it is to keep him alive. Not to mention he was killed OFF-SCREEN. WE DON'T EVEN GET TO SEE ANY--IF ANY--CONVERSATIONS HE HAS WITH SHOUTO OR HIS FAMILY, WHICH WAS THE WHOLE POINT OF NOT KILLING HIM ON THE BATTLEFIELD. INSTEAD OF THE SEXY SHIRTLESS SERVING-FACE-AT-A-FUNERAL IMAGE OF TOUYA WE COULD'VE SEEN A FLASHBACK OF THEM TALKING AND HIM SMILING AND BEING HAPPY WITH THEM FOR WHATEVER TIME THEY HAD AND THAT STILL WOULD'VE BEEN MORE SATISFYING. Y'KNOW. BECAUSE THAT WAS THE WHOLE FUCKING POINT OF THE TODOROKI PLOTLINE?????????????VSSSBBNM,.;;PUSAAXXGHIIRWDFGG

But anyway.

Fixing Touya's death is really simple. We can do two things, actually.

Work with the deus-ex Ice Quirk a little bit, make the Phoenix Theory canon. Ice heals him, the tank is a giant fridge. Lo and behold, it would explain why he magically healed eyeballs and tearducts. It's an incredibly slow process, but eventually he'd heal enough to be out of the tank and in a normal hospital setting for the rest of his recovery. It also gives him a goal to pursue for the future, I.E learning how to control the new side of his powers and mayybeeee getting interested in studying Quirk Biology in the process 👀

He simply!!!!!! Doesn't die!!!!!!!!! Out of ALLLLLLL the MHA characters, I would 100% believe you if you told me that Touya Todoroki nevertheless persisted. That's like...his entire character. You don't even need to give me a reason. His entire character up until now has been 'the one that's somehow still alive' to the point that the fucking Dr. Eggman lookin ass mad scientist that brought him back to life in the first place (in WORSE condition) was like 'yeah no idea how he's still here that's scary'. I'm sorry, the entire fucking show I've had to see A. An old man without a face with a back alley ventilator system shoved directly into his stoma that's somehow fine and talking perfectly, and B. Another old man missing his ENTIRE digestive tract for years and is still up and walking around somehow with no G-tube or colostomy bag to be seen, so I think by the power of God and Anime, Touya could probably survive his injuries and it would be within the realm of believability for the show. In fact, it's LESS believable that he stayed alive through all that by spite alone and then when he finally gets offered love and acceptance, that determination and tenacity to stay alive suddenly goes out the window. If anything, it should've made him MORE determined to live.

Sorry I got carried away with that one. But there. Everyone is saved and the core themes are intact.

Now we just have...

The Overall Actions and Reactions Post-War

Gonna sum this up really quickly:

-The cameras never turned off. They're built for Quirk resistance because they're a fucking newscast in a Hero society if their technology broke every time there were heavy Quirk exchanges there would never be any fucking news. Making them conveniently lose footage so none of the civs can see the Villains humanity is just rubbing salt in the wound and serves no narrative purpose in line with pre-established themes. Everyone saw what was recorded, and it helped the Villains' cases for rehabilitation.

-We do not censor out this battle in future history books. Everyone is very familiar with the final fight and the events and circumstances leading up to it. It is not erased from public memory as soon as possible. In fact, it's frequently studied and referenced when making new policies to avoid making the same mistakes. Hori. Wtf.

-We do not reinstate the Hero Rankings in any way shape or form, and Shouto is the biggest voice in dismantling this system. Voila, this is now actually the story of how they all became the greatest Heroes, because they aren't ranked. They're all literally the greatest Heroes, and so will everyone after them.

-This IS actually portrayed in the epilogue, but yes, let's be LESS reliant on Heroes and police and MORE invested in the community!!!!!!! Even more so than what's portrayed!!!!! Take another bit from Spider-Man: Anyone can wear the mask!!!!!! Let's make a world where Heroes have too much time on their hands and not just make more of them, right????????? Remember that????????

-WE DO NOT REINSTATE THE COMMISSION. WE GOT RID OF THEM CORRUPT HOES FOR A REASON!!!!!! NO A CHANGE OF THE GUARD IS NOT ENOUGH TO FIX IT WE'RE NOT 7YRS OLD!!!!! HORI. WTF. The only thing I want them to be in charge of is licensing Heroes. I want these fuckers to be the DMV of the Hero world and that's IT!!!!!!!

Which brings us to...

Hawks' Fate

I don't even fuck with this man like that, but he did not deserve to become CEO of the organization that groomed and abused him since he was a child when all he wanted to do was chase tail and fuck off to a beach somewhere. Considering the fact that he also, like, killed people he shouldn't have, let him retire like Endeavor, please. We're done giving the old guard power and privilege, especially when they explicitly did not and do not want it (and when they did have it, they misused it). The only thing I want this man involved with is Toga's recovery alongside Uraraka. Specifically, I want him paying for it and anything else she might need. Fuck it, you know what, make HIM Endeavor's personal aide instead of Rei!!!! He gets to be a little simp and Endeavor gets a replacement son to fill Natsu's spot. Everyone wins.

(He does deserve that hairline tho. I ain't fixin that.)

So that leaves...

Spinner's Fate

I'm not changing much here, besides the fact that now Shiggy is alive and I think they should be ✨Roommates✨ eventually (and obviously he's gonna be much less riddled with survivor's guilt). I still think he should write that book, but I also think that with his multiple Quirks, he should team up with scientists to understand how Quirks work in the body (and maybe get some of them removed from his).

And next...

Chisaki's Fate

I just think this guy needs to be in the same place as the other Villains, at least for a fraction of the time. Why is he just...out. He was also in that daycare and could definitely use some help before we just let him loose in the streets because he said sorry (Can the League just say sorry then??????????).

I do think afterwards he should get involved with something chemistry related tho, cause those bullets of his came in clutch.

And on that note...

The Todorokis' Fates

And by Todorokis I mean two of them, specifically Rei lol

Yeah, she's not gonna be Endeavor's nurse for the rest of her life lol. That man has more money than God, he can hire an aide like everybody else. In fact, they're not even living together. Do you remember how earlier in the series, he gave them a new house? So they could live away from him and he would be in the old house by himself? I liked that plan. Let's go back to that plan. I'm not gonna go as far as to make them divorce, if they're together they're together, but I think separation is a necessary must at this point because if they MUST stay together, they should at least try dating for once???????? Girl was actually bought like maybe they figure out if they even still like each other at all, or ever did.

(Also, I have to laugh as a motorized wheelchair user that Hori drew her pushing Endeavor all happy and blissfully. Motorized wheelchairs are not meant to be pushed like that lol. They have push features for emergencies and small around-the-house distances of course, but uh, mine's 350 pounds without me in it. It's not usually anyone's first choice.)

But there is one more Todoroki I have a lot to talk about, so that finally brings us to...

What Do We Do With The Villains + Kurogiri Now That They're Alive???????????

We take everything from comic books except what would actually makes sense with the story lol

Surprise!!!!!! We're doing Arkham!!!!!! This is another low-hanging fruit thing that I'm almost a little offended that it wasn't implemented. Obviously Arkham has its problems in the Batman canon that we're gonna try to avoid, but I honestly think Batman villains and the core MHA Villains are pretty similar in their execution in that they are primarily mentally ill victims of society who have done very terrible things, but the audience (and Batman himself) is actively rooting for them to get better over just rotting in jail or being killed. Two-Faced has killed sooooo many people and has relapsed a ton, but I ultimately still want to see him get better because he was Batman's best friend once and a good man, and what happened to him was a tragedy. I think all the Villains deserve a space where they can humanely heal from their issues and gain support, while also being safely separated from society while they're still dangerous to themselves and others.

Oh, but Batman and his endless money bought Arkham. Who do we know who has access to trust fund money, an investment in the mentally ill, and the bonus of a medical background that could fund such a thing?

Ladies and Gentlemen, please put your hands together for...

Natsuo Todoroki!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

My mans graduates from college and immediately uses his money as a doctor and his inheritance to open up Rindou Sanctuary, in honor of his mother Rei and named after her favorite flower (I don't think he'd want to give Enji the satisfaction of his last name attached to his greatest achievement). He's head doctor on site and the board, and visits Touya every shift once he's healed enough to be transferred to the facility. He is very invested in his brother's treatment and refuses to lose him again--at least not until they're proper old men.

It is publicly funded by donors and taxes alike, and Enji, naturally, is always the highest donor. Call it reparations.

And there you have it! That's how to fix the epilogue. It took longer to type than think about. I could care less about canon shipping, so y'all can keep that (or not). I'm just here to fix the structural problems that have no reason to be here at this point. As I said, once I redrew lines Hori already set up and just abandoned, it pretty much fixed itself.

Hope you enjoyed it and I hope it eases the grief a little!!!!! They're alive look I fixed it!!!!!! <3

(also feel free to use anything I said in here in your own fix-it fics!!!! Just tag me so I can read them 👀)

[thewertsearch]

Second part of the giga-ask compilation!

@publicuniversalworstie asked: Why assume the Horrorterrors would know that changing events would create a doomed timeline? That assumes both A) that the horrorterrors know the future and B) that they don't think it can really be changed. Maybe they genuinely thought they could change things, such as by perhaps fulfilling all the requisite loops a different way? Imagine a scenario where a time traveler learns of their death, therefore being destined to die, and instead fake their death to create the conditions under which they learned of the death originally.

It's possible. But if the Horrorterrors do have a way to trick the Alpha Timeline like that, then they've really been holding out on us by not mentioning it to the Players. Such a revelation would completely change the game - we might even be able to fake the Earth's death.

Anonymous asked: i want to learn more about coding to analyze homestuck better - do you have a place i could start? resources? idk love the liveblog hope you're doin well :]

Absolutely! I've got two separate answers for you, depending on what your goal is here.

If your main goal is just to analyse Homestuck, then you’re probably best off picking a language whose syntax is easy to understand, such as Python. You'll pick up on the basic logic pretty quickly, and the ~ATH snippets will start to make a lot more sense.

If you’re actually interested in programming for its own sake, then I recommend you start with my own first language, C. It’s a lot harder for a newbie to get to grips with, but doing so will give you a much more solid theoretical foundation then ostensibly ‘easier’ languages.

W3schools is a decent starting resource for both languages - but if you need more specific guidance, let me know, and I'd be happy to help!

@skelekingfeddy asked: actually grubmom having the same color wires as in that pic of sahlee wasnt intentional! i based it on how sollux’s game grubs have red and blue wires attached to them

Serendipity!

Anonymous asked: Did you run any mysterious ~ath programs on that computer of yours?

Honestly, running ATH on that thing would probably have improved it.

Anonymous asked: One voice headcanon I have for Terezi is the English dub of Power from Chainsaw man

Honestly, she sounds pretty much exactly how I imagine Terezi does. She even has the horns!

@martinkhall asked: I'm surprised none of the suggested instruments for a time player were an ocarina.

Some fruit is just too low-hanging.

@delicate-ruins asked: what's an animal you like that you think doesn't show up very much in media, be it fiction or news or just generally? example: i like secretary birds. but except for videos about them, i have never heard them references.

They're not obscure, per se, but there will never be enough sloths in media. The only fictional sloth of note is Sid from Ice Age – and he does not do them justice.

Capybaras are also underrated as hell – so much so that LibreOffice, which I'm using to edit this compilation, doesn’t even recognize the word as real!

Anonymous asked: “I’m trying to figure out if it’s fully a Breath outfit, or if there’s some Heir stuff too.” the general rule for god tier outfits is that the colors and symbol represent the aspect, the clothes represent the class. so, for example, if two princes of different aspects ascended, their clothing style would be the same but they would a have different color scheme. @skaiandestiny asked: If you haven't already figured it out, class informs the godtier outfit and aspect informs the colors and icon!

In that case, there is something about John’s outfit that says ‘heir’ – but nothing really stands out to me.

@driventopoison asked: Hey, I don't know if it's just me but it seems like you've skipped ahead. I have been following your liveblog daily, but I haven't seen you come across the windy thing yet. Is this because you were using the app or something? Also just want to let you know that I love your liveblog. Keep up the good work!

Thank you! Anyway, John’s Windy Thing is indeed documented on the liveblog, and it’s visible to me. I was using the app for some of that segment, though – are app-made posts particularly buggy?

@classpecting-guide-official asked: story about a modded game of sburb where the characters notice that something isn't right and slowly realize that their world is a lie

Back in Act 1, this is pretty much what I thought was happening. It was a simpler time.

@ignis-cain asked: Note the colors the capslock flashes for WV.

When WV locks his capsule, the button’s light flashes red and green – but I’m not sure what the significance of these colors is, in this situation.

Anonymous asked: i know i'm SUPER late to answer this, but i think the instantiation thing is the same as any video game, newly made with a prebaked history. when you name your character, that has been their name for their whole life, even though you thought it up a few seconds ago. when you enter the medium, the planet has a history and the denizens have memories, even though they just showed up when you entered.

Yeah, I’m pretty sure this is indeed what’s going on. The implications are just a lot more wild when the game is physically real, rather than virtual!

@kintatsu asked: So, I know I'm a little late to the party, but I have to point out: Alternian sunlight doesn't need to be THAT much stronger than Earth's to blind Terezi as quickly as it did. Trolls are nocturnal, which means they almost definitely have a tapetum lucidum (eyeshine membrane), which means that however much light entered Terezi's eyeballs? Her retinas were blasted by every photon twice.

Damn, Vriska. For a second, I thought this ask was explaining why Terezi wasn't in as much pain as I'd thought - but this alternate explanation might actually be worse than what I was picturing!

@delicate-ruins asked: It's delightful to see somebody read Homestuck and be as charmed by it as I and a lot of my friends were way back when we first read it, and the calm, digesting pace at which you're enjoying it is honestly so nice. I rushed way too much to catch up since my friends recommended it in about 2016, which means I went from knowing nothing about the comic to being caught up on it in like a week. I never sat down with the ideas and thought "hey, does this mean XYZ?" because quite often I got the answer five seconds later as I rushed to catch up. But seeing you asking those questions is so so fun. Yeah, DOES it mean that?? Guess we'll find out! In the meantime, we get to guess, which means we basically get to have fun twice. It's reigniting my enjoyment of homestuck quite significantly, I think!

Thank you! It’s really nice to be able to engage in a dialogue about the comic through these asks, which is something that wouldn't be possible if I was speeding through it. As I always say, I'm here for a good time and a long time.

@manorinthewoods asked: Alright, here's another transtimeline fun fact. Each of the kids was supposed to have a Quest related to their associated material - John had a land covered in oil, Rose's ocean was polluted with chalk, the gears of LOHAC were gummed by amber, and LOFAF was in a nuclear winter. Ultimately, while the ocean of LOLAR is still chalky, nothing but John's oil made the cut. ~LOSS (16/5/23)

I think it was a good change, then. Not everything has to be a pattern, and Dave's two weird maybe-quests are a lot more unique and interesting than a generic 'materials quest'.

@captorations asked: oh hey, this walkaround! so funny story, i used to run a blog where i posted one of terezi’s canon appearances each day, in order. yes, i completed my task, and more besides. however! when i was wandering through this as terezi, a glitch rendered me trapped. i decided that this counted as a noteworthy appearance, and took a screenshot. then, by sheer coincidence, it ended up being posted on… halloween. it was pretty great (also don’t forget to check out ctrl + t)

You accessed the double-secret version of Past Karkat: Wake Up, which plays the Earthbound Halloween Hack version of Megalovania rather than the Homestuck one.

Anonymous asked: Personally, I think John gaining so many levels so quickly is tied to his role as the heir - he gains so many levels without really trying, not because he's better than the trolls or his friends, but because he just kind of falls into it. The game rewards him for taking the path of least resistance.

That certainly makes sense if we just look at John - but I have trouble reconciling this interpretation with our other Heir. Equius certainly has some advantages, but they aren't exactly unique to him, as you'd expect them to be if his Heir class was responsible for them.

Yes, he's a highblood, but he's outranked by three non-Heirs - and his strength doesn't seem to be unique either, as Feferi seems capable of similar feats. Perhaps Equius will trip and fall into more unique privilege, but it hasn't happened yet.

Anonymous asked: my personal headcanons for midnight crew claspects: Slick - Prince of Blood, Droog - Mage of Space, Boxcars - Knight of Heart, Deuce - Bard of Doom. knowing you youre probably gonna attempt to analyse these LOL

Slick has had ties to Blood since he first met Karkat, so that tracks - and Boxcars is a shipper, so Nepeta's aspect is probably the best fit for now. I'm not sure about the other two, but I'll revisit them later!

[cirilee]

Oranges put Isidor on the spot.

The way they defied Hive regulations.

An obscene fruit, so unashamed about its non-synthetic heritage, so unabashed in its presentation, so decadent, as its blinding hues brightened up the dull gray of McHale’s cell.

Teeyama Averon McHale’s decorative bowls were filled to the brim with them, overflowing. Currently, her right hand is lurking in between, her dark skin contrasting against the bright colors. She lifts up one tiny tangerine and it stops right in front of a face, that is nothing but Hive regulation standard, in the midst of all this opulence, as she sits in a chair, that isn’t just a chair.

It's beautiful, ornately detailed and stitched by hand. It is also, obscene.

McHale is bred for leadership. All soft and sweet, despite her age, and in the middle, piercing eyes that look beyond the surface.

Aryu Isidor Tichy feels naked.

He inches backwards.

His voice is low, “I’m honored you sent for me to entertain you again”

McHale smiles that charming taskmaster smile, that is supposed to put lower units at ease. Isidor is soothed by it, he really is. But something hasn’t been quite right with his thinking for a while. He can’t let himself be lulled into feeling safe, when he wasn’t.

McHale’s eyes seem too large, too shiny. Her oranges too insulting.

“I’m here to help you”, she says and she sounds so friendly and cute, “You’ve applied for reeducation?”

“Yes”

“Why?”

What an inane question.

The minute Isidor thinks that his eyes widen, his stance loosens, and he starts to sweat. He’s not supposed to doubt a taskmaster. Not even in his thoughts. Not even a little bit. No-

“Are you okay, Isidear?”

The pet name feels doubly humiliating, doubly insulting. Precisely because Isidor feels like he’s the one keeping with the rules, while McHale, his Teeyama, was decidedly not, was hoarding oranges as if one could just do that, as if it held no significance.

“I think I might have caught a dissident thoughtvirus”, Isidor says quietly. His thick shoulders square up, cage in his plump cheeks. “I think I might become a liability to the Hive”

McHale doesn’t stop smiling.

Which confuses Isidor. “That’s not good, Teeyama McHale …” he clarifies.

“It's not good at all, no”

She starts peeling the tangerine. Her fingers are now sticky and wet.

Disgusting.

Isidor flinches at his own thought. He quickly opens his mouth again, “Why haven’t you fulfilled my request?”

“For reeducation?”

Isidor nods.

Instead of explaining herself, McHale bites into the tangerine, completely forgoes the bite-sized pieces it's already made of, completely ignores how a tangerine is supposed to be eaten.

Drops of fruit juice spill onto the table underneath her.

The sound makes Isidor’s skin crawl and sweat even more. “I’m not used to tasks of this nature”

She says, “But you’ve excelled so far”

He cries, “Its highly unconventional”

She shrugs. “Its pretty simple”

It was. Objectively. Isidor’s tasks used to be comprised of low level engineering in the field of household robotics. Sometimes a whole automaton. A bit of programming on the side. And that’s it. Endless days of fixing cat food dispensers, and chatting up sexbots, and all in all feeling useful, feeling fulfilled, feeling … not stressed.

But then McHale took over his sector, and McHale, well.

Now he’s getting very specific, but simple tasks. Not all the time. But some of the time. Like now.

She gives one orange a little push. Makes it roll towards Isidor. Her hair sways up and down the tiniest amount, her non-regulation stiff curls like a halo around her head, as she continues to smile. She says, “I want you to eat this … ”

Isidor curls into himself, his wrinkles morphing his face into a near parody of disgust. It looked like he was playing it up. He wasn’t.

McHale continues, “ … and enjoy it”

By now, Isidor is whimpering. A man his age, early forties, big like a boulder, thinning curly hair, and even thinner beard hanging off of him, whimpering. It made an amusing image, and that fact was reflected in the way McHale started snickering.

“I will do what you ask of me Teeyama, but I cannot control my emotions. I have to protest against this heinous act being forced upon me!”

“Are you, a loyal and goodhearted unit of this Hive … defying a taskmaster?”, McHale whispers.

“NO!”, Isidor cries out, because of course, that would be even worse. “No, I- I’m sorry-” As he grumbles out more apologies he grabs the orange.

It tasted good.

It tasted great.

And then the joy makes way for dread.

“I’m not cleared for a toilet, McHale!” He hadn’t even addressed her by title, he was so shocked, “I can’t eat non-regulation food, I’ll- I- My body is designed to eat manna! You know how there’s talks of removing the workers’ digestive system, since- And- Well-”

“You can use my toilet, Isidor”

He doesn’t calm down. In fact, he gets even redder.

Bites into the orange again. Munches quietly. Fights down the little sounds of joy at the bursts of grotesque sweet and sour on his tongue.

–

So. The next steps were obvious.

Denunciating McHale. Make a report with her taskmaster. It was easy. It would be done in mere minutes. Isidor could be rid of this nuisance, could be rid of her in seconds.

But that orange had tasted nice.

And those occasional “Just enjoy yourself” tasks. What bad could they in effect do? Other than make him feel guilty. He wasn’t feeling guilty all the time of course. And during those “fun” tasks he usually ended up feeling rather good. Nice. Well.

But oh. Oh. The Hive couldn’t be sustained like this. What if McHale wasn’t just doing this to him, but to their entire sector!

For the first time Isidor wished he could have comm clearance, could actually speak with his fellow units. Until now it had never turned up as something desirable to him.

“Why me?”, Isidor asks, sitting in her massage chair and not having enough mindspace to actually care about what he’s asking.

“Because I like you”, McHale says.

“I’m Isidor Tichy, Aryu of C-2-4 and most days I clean gunk out of motherboards. I’m not special enough to be considered for procreation, not pretty enough to be a toy someone would keep, not smart enough to climb ranks-”

McHale had been smiling, but now her eyes wander. Her nose wrinkles. “You’re the perfect drone, yes. But with you its self inflicted. With you, there’s effort”

“Yes. I strive to be the best worker I can be-”

“Yes. You strive. You struggle”

“Why thank you”

Defiant sarcasm. Taskmasters were legally obligated to put a drone into the freezing pod for that.

McHale just continues talking, “With you, there’s effort to be the perfect drone. No one else has to try, Isidor. All the other units don’t even think about it. They just are. The perfect drone, I mean”

Isidor’s eyes are half lidded. He’s melting into the chair. He’s never gotten a massage in his life. This. This could be worth it.

“I want to fit in”, he says. Truthfully.

“But you don’t”, McHale concludes. “Just like me”

–

That conversation is what sets him off. Back in his cell (which was perfectly cut to his body, barely room enough to take one step; really, only enough space to fall on top of the regeneration mat), back in his cell, Isidor replays the last conversation.

Then all of their conversations.

And comes to a decision.

He never sees McHale again. She vanishes, along with her spacious cell, her massage chair, her toilet, her oranges.

Isidor regrets it immensely. Isidor also justifies it with every thought.

And in the end he realizes he’s alone.

Maybe more alone than before, where he hadn’t even known of a possibility to not be.

[finchinmoria]

My Favorite ROP Characters as Crystals

I needed something fun and low-stakes to keep my mind off Real Life Things, so here are the crystals I associate with some of my favorite Rings of Power characters 💎💍💎

Adar, Celebrimbor, Annatar, Mirdania, Elrond, Galadriel, & Gil-Galad under the cut.

🖤Adar🖤 Black Tourmaline

Black Tourmaline is one of the most protective crystals. Black Tourmaline has a Mohs hardness of 7-7.5 so it is fairly resistant to scratching. Unlike Uruks, you can put Black Tourmaline in the sun, but extreme heat or temperature changes can damage it. Metaphysically along with protection it is said to purify and transmute negative energy in the auric field and in the environment. Physically, it has high iron levels so it’s also highly magnetic, which tracks because regardless of how other characters feel about it, no one can ever seem to get out of being in close proximity to this Uruk. The downside of Black Tourmaline in my experience is that it can be a little too grounding on the root chakra so if you’re in a bad place it can pull you down even further until you’re just sort of obsessed over safety and physical resources. And if there’s one guy that needs to get out of his root chakra from time to time, it’s Adar. (If you’re giving me the side eye emoji guy 😏 thinking about Adar’s root chakra, you know very well that’s not what I meant. Also, let’s be friends.) It doesn’t help that I think Nenya looks a lot like raw Blue Celestite which has a very high vibe crown chakra energy, and the little time he had with it was enough to knock some clarity into Adar. So, yeah, he needs all the high vibes he can get, but he’s still more of a root guy overall. The rough/raw form of Black Tourmaline is pretty much Adar’s aesthetic to a T, honestly his sword has the same texture on parts of it. But the crystal can also be polished and is often made into jewelry so you can carry its protective properties with you. Which for someone who apparently hasn’t changed clothes in like three thousand years, a pendant would probably be right up his alley.

[I almost picked Black Obsidian for being volcanic glass and also possessing protective qualities, but it was just a lil too shiny so the tourmaline won.]

🍯Celebrimbor🍯 Honey Calcite

All right, look, calcite is one of the most common minerals on earth and it comes in such a variety of vibrant colors (a lot of them look like candy) that they have been given an array of trade names related to food, but when it comes to Honey Calcite (also called Golden or Amber calcite) I’ll give it a pass. You look at this crystal and it just looks like honey and all the connotations that come with it: sweet, comforting, warming, joyous. Which are all the things I think about when I see Celebrimbor. Metaphysically this crystal contains properties befitting the greatest of Elven smiths: creativity, willpower, strength, confidence, resilience, clarity, and focus, among others. Physically, though, you have to be more careful with Honey Calcite than other stones. It comes in at only a 3 on the Mohs scale of hardness so it is susceptible to scratching and you shouldn’t leave it in the sun or put it in water. It can be and is carved but only when handling it properly. Raw and tumbled forms of this crystal are pretty widely available. All in all I think this describes Celebrimbor pretty well. He’s open and eager to share, grow, and learn. He is strong, focused, and driven. But his weaknesses and fears over his familial past become flimsy containers for his principles and ideals. Rather than focus on his end though, I prefer to think of the time when he built up his craft. Those years no doubt were industrious, warm, joyous, and creative in many different ways. Things we all hope to return to when times of darkness fall upon us. Things that Celebrimbor’s story gives us.

✨Annatar✨ Pyrite

I know, I know, it’s kind of low hanging fruit to attribute literal FOOL’S GOLD to Annatar, but it’s much more than that. What other crystal befitting this “Lord of Gifts” other than the pinnacle of the nature museum gift shop that is pyrite. Like, yes, the other colorful smooth tumble stones are pretty and did stuff to my brain but those dense sparkling chunks of gold were what my eight-year-old heart truly longed for and I would have considered crimes at the very least of murder to score a piece or two. And I don’t know what it is about it but as an adult pyrite continues to be one of my favorite crystals. What’s even more, I for some inexplicable reason love tumbled pyrite. Have you seen tumbled pyrite? Not like the polite smooth sort, I’m talking the feral kind with all the little craters and pockets. I saw a meme once that said whoever was the first to decide to tumble pyrite should be sent to jail forever, and it’s true but also, I love it? My tumbled piece of pyrite is probably my favorite in my collection. How? Why? I don’t know. It attracts and it repels. It manifests and it reflects bad stuff away. All my chakras sing for this stupid stone. It’s so dense, it gives me everything I want. Pyrite is only a 6-6.5 on the Mohs scale of hardness which isn’t bad, but it’s not great, either. Pyrite does tend to be brittle and breaks/powders easily. Even though the natural cubic formations are largely the most interesting and prized, that hasn’t stopped people from carving the material into any and every shape you could want (even the audacity that is tumbled) or to use it in jewelry. So, yes, Annatar is pyrite. I hope someone lobs a piece of it at his head then kisses it better.

🤍Mirdania🤍 Stilbite

The energy of this crystal is compassionate and calming. Metaphysically it is used in matters of emotions and can help with understanding dreams. Overall it has a very nourishing and peaceful energy. Physically, Stilbite rates 3.5-4 on the Mohs scale of hardness, so it is a fairly soft stone. However it is not as fragile as some other softer crystals. You can briefly get it wet or place it in the sun without damaging it. Naturally the crystal forms in clusters but it can be polished. Clusters/raw pieces, tumbles, and palm stones are popular. The peachy, gleamy color of this crystal is what made me think of Mirdania at first, but the other properties of the stone fit well, too. She is nourishing in her relationships but she is strong and driven in her forge work. She stands up in her own way when she feels like action needs to be taken. Her softness isn’t fragile, necessarily, but it can be taken advantage of. Overall I think she values trust and harmony. This stone is also associated with wisdom, truth, and enlightenment. Certainly all traits Celebrimbor would have valued in her work as one of his smiths. And not to come off like Creepy Annatar, here, but I think this stone greatly matches her gentle beauty. **Does NOT reach out to touch her hair**

💙Elrond💙 Lazulite

Lazulite isn’t a super well known crystal, but polished pieces of it are fairly easy to find and purchase. It has a darker purply blue color with speckles that look like a dreamy, cloudy night sky. Physically it has a Mohs hardness rating of 5.5-6.5 so it can be susceptible to scratching from harder materials. Brief encounters with water or sunlight will not damage it. When I first got my piece of Lazulite, I immediately associated it with Elrond, because of the likeness it has to stars and the night sky, but also in the measured wisdom this crystal exudes. Metaphysically this stone holds psychic properties most apropos for an elf known for his gift of foresight: intuition, interdimensional communication, transformation, channeling, clairvoyance, and attunement to higher realms. Elrond always struck me as a very third eye centered person, overthinking things most of the time but only because his intuition about what it right tends to be met with backlash. The ability to fight and stand up for himself while also caring deeply for others has been quite a journey for him and is where his wisdom becomes derived from in his later years. That’s the vibe I get from Lazulite. The sky may be vast, dark, and overwhelming, but you can still look to it for guidance, light, and connecting the dots. You’ll get there in the end, and if you’re mindful, you can remain as kind as summer while you do it.

💛Galadriel💛 Rutilated Quartz / Rutile

Rutilated Quartz is when needle-like inclusions of goldish to copper hues grow within quartz. For Galadriel, I most associate the type that have gold inclusions within a super Clear Quartz. These are also known as Angel Hair Quartz, and even though it’s more of a LOTR thing in which she gifts Gimli her hair, I associate all eras of Galadriel with this crystal. As one of the most powerful and fair of all elves, Rutilated Quartz also looks magical and otherworldly, and high quality pieces are nothing short of dazzling. The sharp, spiky look of some more aggressive Rutile is a great illustration of her sharp skills as a warrior, and veer away from being particularly beautiful into being downright scary. Clear Quartz is said metaphysically to be an amplifier of energy, so it gives a boost and enhancement to any other crystal you pair it with. (Glares at Sauron.) Rutilated Quartz rates 6-7.5 on the Mohs scale of hardness, so it is pretty durable. The list of metaphysical properties of Rutilated Quartz is vast and far too many to list, but most of the properties are action oriented and powerful. This is not a restful crystal, this is a get !@#$ done and make things happen crystal. Even if that means sometimes you stab first and think later. Overall I think this crystal perfectly encapsulates the Lady of Light in all her complexities and brightness.

💜Gil-Galad💜Amethyst

Now before you get all uppity that I didn’t choose a gold or yellow crystal… 1) I’ll get to that… and 2) you cannot say he exudes solar plexus sunshine energy. He may be adorned in gold lamé but in his soul he is tired and he is Done.

First off, the reigning royalty of the crystal world is Amethyst. There’s probably not a single crystal collector who doesn’t have at least one piece of Amethyst. Every beginner set of tumbled stones includes an Amethyst because that’s The Law. Perhaps because of this, everyone thinks Amethyst can Do It All. And let’s be honest, Amethyst also thinks it can Do It All. It cannot, but it is still constantly thrown into every imaginable situation, and, well. She does her best (gender neutral). Metaphysically Amethyst is known for everything from physical healing to spiritual and psychic properties. On the Mohs scale, Amethyst comes in at a 7. One thing to be wary of is that Amethyst will fade in the sun. However, it is safe to put in water.

When Amethyst, typically purple in color, is heated it turns into Citrine which is yellow. (Very complementary as the opposite of purple on the color wheel is yellow.) Natural Citrine that has been mined from the ground tends to be a darker, brownish yellow, while Amethyst mined then heat-treated to turn into Citrine is a brighter more lemon looking yellow. There is a lot of heat-treated Citrine on the market. It’s not a “fake” crystal, but it was treated to change the color. If you want the natural “real” Citrine, you’ll have to do a little investigating but once you know what you’re looking for, it’s fairly easy to spot the difference. There are examples of crystals where part of the stone has turned into yellow Citrine but part of the stone remains purple Amethyst and these are called Ametrine.

All of that to say, our High King has had to be put under a lot of pressure to be this golden and under all that heat he’s just an overworked, broody but beautiful little gem. Still, he carries on. Highly coveted but does anyone really appreciate who he genuinely is?! Give this elf a break, a hug, a back rub. Just don’t leave him out in the sun for too long.

Thanks for reading. Obviously this is 💖just for fun💖 If you have any suggestions or additions, let us crystal bitch it up. Pretty rocks and pretty characters go so well together and I’d love to see other takes!

[trtyutr]

Attention of the Court V

Ryan lies on his couch, clad on in his boxers. His hands lie on his five week baby bump. One lies on top of the baby filled mound while the other paces the side of the bump that looks more as if it six months along if it were normal. It was the last week he was staying in his apartment before he moves to a small condominium. Then the packages arrive.

It takes him a bit to get up to the door. He opens the door a crack before taking a peak outside to see if there's anyone who would see his nearly naked form. When he saw that the coast was clear, he looked down to see two boxes, one small and red, the other large and blue. He moves as quickly as he can with his over one hundred kids weighing him down. He manages to push them inside just in time for him to hear some another door down the hallway open up. He's safe. He grabs blue box. Its cardboard is that same dark shade of blue as the envelopes. He rips off that the blue tape to find a piece of paper on top of a bunch of neatly folded up clothes. The paper says that he was given ownership of a managed account with $112,500 in its portfolio. "It's increasing by 50% each time. I think I can get used to it. "The clothes are also pretty nice." He said as he picked through them. There was a variety in the selection, t-shirts, fishnet tank tops, to white button down dress shirts. These actually came at a great time, because he down to three boxers, two sweat pants, and a hoodie that barely covers half his belly. He tries on a t-shirt. It's a bit tight, but it fits. It even covers his baby bump. It doesn't leave a lot to the imagination, though. He turns to the red box. It flips open easily to reveal an amulet on a silver chain along with a note. "You only have to wear it for five minutes for our deals. I don't think it's my style, but I want the money." He sets an alarm for ten minutes, just to be safe. He puts it on. The metal is cool, and for some reason wearing it makes him feel off, like his thoughts can't form. It wears off after five minutes, and when the alarm goes off, he puts the amulet off and forgets it. Three days later, he's at the gay bar. He's sitting at a table alone. He's wearing a tank top, a jock, and jeans. He sips his water, when he hears "Can I buy you a drink?" He turns around to see a shorter man with bit chin scruff and a brown leather jacket. "I'm fine with water, but I would like your company." Ryan says patting the seat beside him. "I'm sorry if this is forward, but are you" "Pregnant? Yes. I'm about five weeks along." The strangers face knits together as a few gears start to turn, but soon he smiles again as the glamour pushes away all those bothersome questions. "I was going to ask single, but pregnant is good is good to know too. It's hot." He scoots his chair closer. The man puts his hand on Ryan's leg. "You're hot." Ryan's at the stranger's place. He's peeled off the tank top and lying on the bed. He's being showed a series of strap one. "Which one does Daddy like?" Ryan points to a ivory white eight incher. "This one, and don't worry, I'm loose enough." He says taking off his jeans. "No wonder a slut like you is pregnant. That's even hotter." A condom, some generous lube, and a transman rutting into him, Ryan's cumming into his jock hand's free. "Dear Peers, my game is covered, and our fertile Ryan is growing like a garden, but only with his womb, so I'm going to send him a fruit basket with everything that a growing father needs. Every vote of yours will add your voted fruit to the basket. I have some wonderful Milky Coconuts, great for building pectorals. I have Juicy Peaches, great for the glutes. Heavy Avocados that hang low and heavy on the tree, perfect for making man virile. Long Bananas, which will help his manhood. Maybe Fatty Olives to add some fat on his form. Or maybe Protein Packed Berries to help build his muscle. " (Instead of winner takes all, each vote in this poll will make Ryan grow in whatever you vote for.)

[batsplat]

who do u root against 😈😈😈😈

(feel free to ignore hahahah im just a hater who likes [non serious] hating <3)

bastianini's the main one (if you read my top ten 2024 rider ranking really carefully, you can probably detect a slight hint of it), which is a long-term investment that got cancelled for a while on pity grounds last year (quite unfortunate because I'd geared up to go full hater mode when I saw his pre-season did not match the hype his factory signing was accompanied with but... alas, portimao) but has really come through for me this year. the exact results profile to hit the sweet spot - enough good stuff to piss you off but ultimately a lot of vindication. I still remember some of the things people were saying after misano ii... and the beautiful thing about hating that profile of athlete is that you can sit back and observe. not everything needs a reaction. you know they will eventually come through for you. awful mentality, I am secretly in the casey camp where I dislike athletes who aren't taking this shit seriously enough. he was my highlight of the final race of the season, aleix's comment made me smile for days

ehhh vinales I think I'm sort of over, it's just increasingly felt too mainstream and low-hanging fruit to bully him. if EVERYONE is ragging on him then what's the point y'know. I was an early adopter - I knew in my soul that man was not a serious operator pretty early on as a motogp fan. this is a case where being a tennis fan came through for me once again, took one look at him and went 'lostgen'. so the unravelling of the 2017 title campaign after how crazy the hype was... pretty satisfying. but also I genuinely felt happy for him when he won cota this year, so perhaps war is over. when I watch him hurtle backwards at each start, occasionally I feel a kind of nostalgia-induced warmth in my heart. when a pigeon shits on your windowsill every week, do you not eventually become fond of the pigeon? you know that it will never desert you... there is beauty in the rhythms of life if you know where to look

I have a long-standing antipathy for alex marquez that I can't quite remember the origin point for, maybe the story about him being favoured over teammate alex rins to win his moto3 title? which, again, this is very much hating for fun territory, it's not exactly his fault, but y'know. I've always been fond of rinsy and this is extremely extremely mean but I did enjoy that aragon 2020 comment where he said he looked at the pitboard and was shocked at the name and went "wow another one, marquez, another marquez!!" which is just so obviously bitchy given they used to be teammates. and like. I can't not respect that energy. you just kinda feel he'd been sitting on that one for half a decade (same way miller still *clearly* has a grudge against this guy lmfao bless him). did pause my hating on pity grounds for part of the honda stint but last year was rewarding on that front. ehhh.... raul fernandez is now old enough I can say I've been a hater historically, but honestly at a certain point that one kinda loses its kick. still don't entirely get why he's gotten a two year contract extension. there might also be another child I strongly suspect I will be a long-term hater of but unfortunately I need to wait until he turns 22 before I can publicly pray on his downfall :(( even if sometimes you just Know where this path is leading you

anyway lol none of these are THAT serious. I genuinely think the danger factor makes it tough for me to commit to the same extent, like with all these riders I have watched at least one crash that absolutely terrified me. I don't feel as comfortable hating on someone I know there is a slim but real chance I might watch die on any given sunday. (vinales' austria 2020 double proper spooked me icl.) with men's tennis the guys I hate I wouldn't piss on if they were on fire, but also that shit's more serious. AND way less satisfying when you're hating on a generational talent who's just winning everything, usually the guys I'm a hater of in motogp give me a fair bit to work with

[thetrial]

14 and 17 for book asks?

hey :) thank you for asking! halfway through writing I ran out of steam to get this in a publishable form, apologies for that!

14. What books do you want to finish before the year is over?

Realistically, the books I am currently actively in the middle of (Will and Testament by Vigdis Hjorth and No Longer Human by Osamu Dazai. One must wonder why I feel like shit 24/7), but if I may take this in a fantastical direction, in order of urgency I would like to finish: Vladimir Majakovski's The Bedbug (archive.org went offline while I was reading it and took my loan with it) Vladimir Nabokov's Pale Fire (read half in february, another third in november and for some reason put it down and didn't pick it up again which is criminal), Valeria Luiseli's Lost Children Archive (also a feb read I couldn't finish due to circumstances), and Roberto Bolaño's The Savage Detectives (which I started in november and stopped because I thought it would be worthwhile to have read Lost Children Archive before that). I am also dreaming of reading War & Peace in one christmas-to-new-year's sitting that will never materialise. Since I am technically also in the middle (beginning) of that one.

17. Did any books surprise you with how good they were?

This is difficult because I had some expectation of everything I picked up to be some variant of "good" (?), so I am taking this to mean 'pleasantly surprised by a book'.

I was suspicious of Y/N by Esther Yi initially because making fun of k-pop fans (or equivalent) is low-hanging fruit in my opinion. I think the book handled obsession very well and was kind to its protagonist, with some interesting insights into alienation and music-as-consumable.

I also was surprised by how much of I had with The Ministry of Time by Kaliane Bradley -- it's relatively lighthearted compared to my usual fare and I was delighted by my ability to be delighted by it :)

Also Sacred and Terrible Air (pjõl..) by Robert Kurvitz completely blew me away. I read it for the suspected reasons and didn't expect much of the book on its own. I was capitavated by the story, the themes, the pale lore (!) and the absurdity of the book as an object in my life. I definitely don't think I could stomach it without the game to soften the blow of nihilism but thankfully we live in a world with Disco Elysium in it :)

[fish-bowl-2]

what are 3 of your favorite quotes/lines from each of the eds?

This has been sitting in my inbox for a hot while. At first because I was busy and going to answer it later, and then because I forgot about it (so sorry).

Anyway, this is hard! There are so many good lines in the show, and that is just from the main three cast. I'm going to highlight some lines that I have been replaying in my head most frequently.

Ed: - "Awww. Kitty cat go meow?" - I think about this SO much. It is so funny. Not only is it a good example of the wordplay in Ed's dialogue, but I love how self-aware it is too. Love seeing him rightfully cocky. He's not wrong that Edd spends most of his time, as my dad would say, "bitchin' and moanin'". - " Hey! Slow down, partner!" - Idk I think it is a very cute reaction to Edd attempting physical violence. It is a very older sibling response lmao - "Shhhh! My yeast is rising." - Lots to like here. Classic line, comes out of nowhere, makes absolutely no sense with or without context. Can't get better than this.

Edd: - "Eddy PLEASSSE. I'm counting the sugar!" - It is so silly. The delivery and Edd's expression kills me. I'm a big fan of the kind of raspy whisper Sam Vincent applied to season 1 Edd. It is very cute imho - "IS THAT THE SUPPORT BEAM TO THE HOUSE?!?!?" - Classic. I also like it when Edd is hysterically screaming. - "...but...how could it be? My computations were precise, rigorous, and painstaking, um. This goes beyond science, Eddy. An unfathomable force sends us a clear message!" - I also like Edd's tendency to go on long-winded speeches. It doesn't have its full effect without visuals, since the character acting adds so much. Edd is such a horrendous liar (same).

Eddy: - "Did you see the sparkle in Johnny's eye? Stop me boys, I'm getting frilly!" - Yeah yeah this is low-hanging fruit, whatever. Does not take away from my reaction upon seeing that episode for the first time. I practically died. - "OH, IS THAT SO? AND WHAT MAKES YOU THINK THAT? MISTER I KNOW EVERYTHING ABOUT KEVIN KNOWING NOTHING ABOUT MY MAGAZINES?" - It is hard to take dialogue from Eddy and NOT think "wow much to unpack". What is his deal here? I mean, I have my own ideas, but I'm not going to make this list longer than it already is. - "Running out of ideas, Double Dee. Think of something that would make me look good." - He sounds so downtrodden : ( reading the dialogue alone doesn't give that impression, but, in the actual scene, Tony makes the delivery sound super genuine, which is a rare expression for Eddy. I appreciate that decision a lot.

[iamthecomet]

Comet!!!! can you ramble abiut your ideas for the earth ghoul circle?

Of course I can! I'm of two minds about earth ghouls. I mean how cool would it be if they were just from...earth. They're the strange things in the forest, the cryptids, the monsters. They're ancient, emerge when they're needed, take care of, and protect, the wild places Human's haven't yet sunk their teeth into. But also, an earth circle would be really fucking cool. SO! Circle ramblings under the cut, just to save space.

I think the earth ghoul circle is, well, a lot like Earth. Solid ground to stand on. Dirt. Trees. Plants. Water. Life (ish). I think, it's one of the only circles that has real seasons. I think most of them keep the same basic climate year round but this circle doesn't. It has a full four seasons (and all the mini ones in between). Earth ghouls have the easiest time adjusting to the climate topside

because they already live in something simliar. I do, however, think the plants are...well...different. Sentient, in some cases, just a little...strange in others (like the difference between Ents, and the trees in Fangorn that just...sort of....move). Earth ghouls are deeply connected to these plants. They understand them--even the ones that can't speak audibly. Earth ghouls are tenders of life. Gardner's of this strange mirror of earth that they call home. It's a pretty, sprawling, circle. With every sort of terrain you can think of. Mountains, and deserts, and lakes, and plains. Earth ghouls are solitary most of the time, and terrotorial. Staking claim to vast reigions of land and defending them with tooth and claw. They mostly steer clear of each other though. There aren't that many of them really, and there's plenty of space. This solitary nature means there isn't much of a hierarchy on the earth level. There is no goverment, no law, no meetings. This is nature, wild and raw and unbidden and so, when someone needs something from an earth ghoul. Someone else (a multi-ghoul or a low-level demon) has to brave the untamable wilds of the earth circle. Dodging vines that reach for their ankles. Avoiding perfect looking peaches hanging ripe in trees--temptation in its highest form, and seek out the ghoul who's needed. There are myths, spread among ghouls and demons who can cross the circles, that you can't eat anything out of the earth circle or you'll never be allowed to leave. That you will become one with the circle, a servant to it and whatever earth ghoul cultivates the fruit you bit into. But mostly, that's just lies to keep outsiders away. Despite the inherent dangers, and the occasional rock shattering battles over territory. The earth circle is probably the most hospitable, which is saying something about the other circles.

[sunieepo]

one of my biggest pet peeves with the bloodborne fanbase (from reading fics, mostly) is that everyone assumes that gender roles in yharnam were the same as gender roles in irl victorian england

...but this is textually not true. yes bloodborne is heavily inspired by victorian england but it's definitely not exactly the same. for starters, obviously, yharnamites worship eldritch gods which isn't at all in line with the cultural values informed by following christianity (i dont think i need to elaborate on what i mean by this)

the most obvious low hanging fruit example is vicar amelia, who is laurence's successor and current head of the healing church... and a woman, something that would never be allowed in victorian england era christianity (and honestly isnt even allowed today in many denominations)

the other which is slightly more obscure but even more valuable is that yharnamites are, in-canon, heavily inspired by the culture of the pthumerians. whether yharnam was literally built in the name of pthumerian queen yharnam or if it was simply named after her later is unclear, but the yharnamites evidently hold pthumerian society in high regard. and the pthumerians were almost certainly a matriarchy (female rulers, and only women were embalmed in coffins). i think of pthumerian to yharnam the way one might think of what rome was to the european countries later influenced by it.

other little things are:

the existence of gratia: an old hunter who was a woman renowned for her physical prowess. not very "womanly", yet clearly exalted by the church; item description refers to her as heroic

clothing details: most clothing items have very little differences between male and female hunters. most notable that does off the top of my head is that the church set for women has stiletto heels, which i think falls in line with my belief that most women of the church were blood saints. nevertheless, you do fight a pair of female church hunters in the dlc who seem to have no issue kicking your ass in said heels. this could be said to be due to game dev laziness, but importantly there are sets that Do have gender differences (like the cainhurst set...)

cainhurst: cainhurst is commonly pointed out by fans as the "odd one out" for its matriarchal vibes, so people assume yharnam must not have been. i agree, but that still doesnt mean yharnam had the same gender roles as the ones we have irl. in fact if anything, theres a distinct lack of emphasis placed on gender in cainhurst item descriptions or even alfred's hateful ramblings; although we assign misogynist intent to him, pointedly what he (and item descriptions) take most issue with isnt the #feminism, but rather cainhurst's obsession with nostalgia and bombast.

this isnt to say that yharnam had No gender roles. it did. just Different ones. (and im not saying it was a matriarchy either btw.) the existence of blood saints indicates that women likely were relegated to religious roles in yharnam. women who could not become blood saints probably became hunters of the church. characters like yurie also show that amelia wasnt an isolated case; women also comprised some amount of choir members as well, indicating that they likely regularly held high positions within the church hierarchy. additionally, lady maria being one of the byrgenwerth scholars indicates that women were allowed as students alongside their male peers, even if they may have been less common. all of these things are markedly different from how victorian gender dynamics were.

its just a bummer because i actually think the gender dynamics of bloodborne are super unique and interesting and are way more nuanced than a simple "women and men swap roles" type thing. but then all these fans who claim to be bloodborne loreheads just supplant irl victorian england gender roles into yharnam and call it a day when that is like... at best lazy/uninspired and at worst directly contrary to canon.

i rly mean no hate ofc (ive even enjoyed reading fics that include such things, even if i disagree with them heavily) and im happy to discuss these thoughts further, i just want to draw attention to smth about the bloodborne lore that i think is sadly overlooked because, when it comes to bloodborne and its feminine themes, ppl get much more caught up on the more overt pregnancy symbolism (which is understandable, but doesnt exist in isolation of the above). i have a lot more to say on this topic but this post is already getting long enough so ill just stop there lol

[end-orfino]

Honestly i usually dont care about movie adaptations that much but minecraft makes me mad because minecraft. Of all things. Had a lot of potential. It sounds silly to say about a sandbox block game but you know what I mean, others have said as much, with the way the world works in minecraft we could have a great movie centered on Steve and Alex. And its not like minecraft only stumbled upon this kind of plot accidentally - it has the End Poem in it on purpose, and its soundtrack is often soft and gentle and calming...ehh. this movie is made from the perspective of someone who knows it through youtube letsplays.

Also, I think they not only missed on potential, but also some INCREDIBLY low-hanging fruit - if you want to make an isekai movie THAT BADLY, then use some of the new skins that were just added to the game as the people who are transported into minecraft? Thats SO EASY to come up with! These skins are a fresh addition that not much has been done with, but afaik they were welcomed by the community. That's a perfect way to get people more used to them. There is a lot of them, true, so maybe just-- use a few of them instead of all idk. And maybe make it so that its implied the rest will join eventually too or smth. Either way DONT GIVE US SOME RANDOM PEOPLE we dont give a shit about

[totmatsu]

Because I just finished watching the full dub (Before, I'd only ever seen clips) here are my thoughts:

It's pretty good for a dub, all things considered. I do have some little qualms, but its highs are high and its really funny from time to time.

-Maybe its the lack of titles (Niisan, -chan applied to self for some sextuplets or to Ichimatsu by Osomatsu) or just the fact that I've been mentally ill about the show since 2016 and that is heavily influenced (obviously) by the original voices, but the sextuplets feel less close in the dub. This isn't something I can point out that many specific examples of, it's just an overall feeling.

-This is a problem that I think a lot of dubs probably have, but the dub doesn't like to let serious moments be. They often toss a joke in during moments that were previously solemn, either pre-punchline solemn moments or just normal ones where there's some amount of build up to it. Because I like the original, this feels bad from an artistic intent standpoint.

-Characters say things they did not or would not say in the original audio, which is something that also would naturally happen in a dub and I understand this, but at times it felt like low-hanging fruit (easiest example I can think of is when Ichimatsu says he's going to go jerk off to cat porn or something. I don't remember the specific dialogue, it was in the Ichimatsu and Choromatsu skit)

-While at times slang is used well, at other times it just seems strange and is like. No one talks like this. Like the amount of times they say "for reals" out loud is insane.

-Jyushimatsu is played as sillier and stupider than he originally was. This was kind of the biggest bummer for me since as a Venture Bros fan when they had announced the dub casting I was SO hype at Jyushimatsu's voice being the voice of Dean Venture, and he does a really good job, but I don't like the way the character's been written all that much...

Basically each voice actor/actress did a fantastic job but some of the localization decisions (that often feel typical of dubs) were just not the right call for me personally.

Some of the dub's best moments are these really simple things where a character just goes "Okay" or "Alright" instead of tsukkomi'ing, I actually liked that a lot (easy examples: In the car in the second episode, Choromatsu just goes "Okay" instead of "Who are you?" and the delivery is fantastic; When walking Jyushimatsu (in "Tell Us, Hatabou"), Ichimatsu is like "...and you're alright with this?" and Jyushimatsu is immediately like "OH YEAH" so quickly its really funny, and then theres a pause and Ichimatsu just goes "...alright.")

Anyway Totty fan moment, they changed his middle school essay to be more queer and I like it lol

"I want to be a cheerleader, by Todomatsu" Todomatsu: NO, WAIT! THIS IS WAY TOO HELLISH! STOP IT! "Cheerleaders are pretty. Cheerleaders are popular. Cheerleaders get to wear skirts and carry pom-poms around." Todomatsu: I WAS JUST A KID! EVERY KID SAYS THAT! HEHEH RIGHT? HEH? "I want to talk about boys with the other girls" Todomatsu: IT WAS JUST A HYPOTHETICAL SITUATION!!! "And then in the evenings, we could sing campfire songs together" Todomatsu: OH COME ON THATS ENOUGH! "And, best of all, I'd look forward to shaving my legs-" Todomatsu: Oh this can't be happening "and feeling the breeze going up my skirt." Todomatsu: So I got a little curious! So what! All kids do! Nothing weird about THAT!

All this said, while I think it'd be cool to see the movie(s) or season 3 dubbed, I'm not sure what they'd do about Osomatsu's voice (Rest in peace, Billy Kametz). I'm cynical and I think if they thought enough money was in it, they'd probably recast, but I don't know.

[postmodernmulticoloredcloak]

Good Omens 2 episode 4: just collide, you two dumb coconuts

After watching both the Edinburgh corpse episode and the Nazi zombie episode, I can confidently conclude that Neil Gaiman did not wash his water bottle and the mold flourished during those few weeks in which those episodes were written, but I cannot even say it’s a bad thing.

Michael Sheen and David Tennant could read the phonebook and it’s the most amazing piece of media you’ve ever seen.

Speaking of those two, *takes a deep breath* *join hands in front of my mouth* *takes another deep breath* I’m fine. They just play their characters so stupidly in love with each other. I think that’s my meta for the episode. You’re welcome.

I mean, insert something deep and insightful here about trust. But also about how this season is going hard with emphasizing how deeply in tune with each other they are, how they are effectively a couple, minus those little rough details they have to polish still. Season 1 did set it up, but now it’s the whole entire fucking plot. Love that for us.

There’s not much to say about the Nazi zombie plot, which summed with the previous Scotland episode is so very British. I was just thinking about how very much not American the previous episode felt, not just because of all the Scottish accent, but for the very unsubtle thing about poverty and morality. And now the other side of the Unescapable Stuff In British Media, i.e. making fun of Nazis in the setting of London during the WW2 bombings.

Under different circumstances I’d say that it’s kinda a low hanging fruit, and that honestly British depictions of 1940s Nazism have gotten stale, but this show has earned its seasonal WW2 moment due to situation of, you know, pale-coconut-collision setting-up.

(I’m taking for granted that the coconuts are going to collide. Don’t say anything.)

My favorite part of the episode is how Crowley has never fired a gun while Aziraphale has an actual license.

I think I can’t quite concentrate in this post because my family are watching an Italian comedy at a high volume in the adjacent room. I think there might be something to analyze in the scenes in the magician’s shop and in the theater, possibly related to the imagery of the “ladies of Camelot”, but I’m not British enough for that (or, well, at all).

Anyway, remember what I wrote about this episode being about the very blurred line between Crowley’s circumstances and Aziraphale’s - what causes one to be a demon and the other to stay an angel - and, well, this episode just explicits the theme, by having the two of them literally calling their respective colors as shades of dark gray and of light gray. There’s no black and white, so where do you draw the line? What is the discriminating factor?

But Marghe, you’ll say, it is literally said that Crowley participated in a battle, the demon guy says it so, he says he was fighting alongside Crowley, which means that at some point Crowley made a deliberate choice to antagonize-- yeah yeah I heard that. Mmm.

To conclude, I can’t wait to see Lord Beelzebub on earth. Or seeing more of them, in general.

Also, the transition from Shax and Beelzebub in hell talking about legions of demons attacking the bookstore, and the gentleness of the scene of Aziraphale and Nina getting to their respective business, was perfect.

Also, someone give Nina a hug.

[randomnameless]

Yeah Sothis was so cruel and selfish that when she won the war against the humans/agarthans she.. restored the land back to its original self before it was ravaged and then screwed off to Zanado. And when she saves Billy's live from getting axed by Kostas or that time when they were stuck in Zaharas and she sacrificed her existence to fuse with Billy so that she could save their class and the people, or when she woke Billy up after the timeskip. I swear Nopes ruined discourse lmao.

Small correction, Sothis didn't "screwed off" to Zanado, she fell asleep.

Just like her granddaughter, Sothis expanded all of her forces and then fell in a restorative sleep, but Nemesis popped up and the rest is history. And let it be from FEH or FE16, we know Sothis enjoys, uh, having a body, being able to move around, party in festivals, etc etc. But she choose to forego this to fall in "sleep mode" to restore the land (and its people? It's still unclear what "humans" like Raphael are, for Agarthans they're not humans, but to Nabateans, they are, so...)

Sothis also shows care, albeit in a tsun tsun mode, for Billy and Billy's students. In Nopes's voiced lines - especially in the jp script - she feels delighted to see Cethleann, calling her a "wonder", seems proud of her children having grown up, worries about Cichol underperforming and shows grief and anger at relics.

IIRC @fantasyinvader already explained it in an earlier post, when FE16 is supposed to follow the Nabatean/Sothis narrative, Nopes is supposed to be the inverse, following an Agarthan narrative/agenda - the endings are reversed, in FE16 only one route ends with the Nabateans having disappeared from the surface of Fodlan, in Nopes, it's the 2/3rds. There's also the sky during the endgames - when Tru Piss was the only route that ended at night, when the others were at dawn or showed some light (Dimitri moving towards the light at the end of AM, Rhea's falling during the sunset in SS, Claude being likened to a new dawn in VW) in Nopes only AG, iirc, ends during the night - most likely because AG is the "bad ending" route for your faction (Agartha), aka Nabateans are still alive, and they return home.

This more or less explains why Sothis is seen in bad light, or supposed to be seen in a bad light, in Nopes - after all we side with Larva.

There's also the tidbit from the developers who wanted to show a more "terrifying" side of Sothis, which would only make sense in that optic, we're Larva'n'pals, Sothis won't save out butts this time, but scorch them since we're trying to erase her and anything related to her... (excepted for AG, again, but the plot follows the same beats because the Fodlan games are nothing but half-assed projects).

I won't say Nopes ruined discourse, but rather the same group of people who ring at your door to sell you flyers for their newest party, and refuse to go until you go to their party and tell them it was the best thing ever.

All jokes aside, I think the Fodlan games have a very interesting subtext, but the devs didn't believe in it, or rather, in its potential and prefered to go with low hanging fruit - make a new waifu, "uwu alone b4u", raise steaks, build parasocial relationships up to 11, jpop music and dialogue that sounds intelligent - to make their game(s?) sell.

And it's unfuriating because deciphering all this subtext and making weird fan theories is still bajillion times funnier than playing those damn games, but even at one point, I guess I'll stop honeypotting because the source material, the one I'm supposed to care about, is just so dry.

[jazzy-a]

I'd like to get to know you!

Hey @windsweptinred! Thanks for the invite!

1: Three ships I like right now...

Hmm, let's assume this means "ship-ships" and not family or friendships, right? Because, WOOF, would we be here for awhile.

Kaz Brekker/Jesper Fahey from Shadow and Bone. It breaks my heart, it ain't ever ever gonna happen, the book apparently spits on me and rips my heart out of my chest, and it's now difficult to find the kind of fanfiction I want for it... Oh sweet suffering. (I will also always accept Kaz/Inej/Jesper in this equation).

Tsukitachi/Hirato from Karneval. Look, it's NOT going away for me, guys. Yes, I know the fandom is dead, there is 0 content for it, and no one knows/cares what I'm talking about with them. Which is SO sad honestly because I know that if it were just more popular, people would be having a blast with the characters, plots, pairings etc. Sigh... Alas, though, Rosencrantz and Gildenstern are DEAD AF... Still, I love my BFF Captains, even if no one knows they exist but me lol.

Lastly, probably Steve Harrington/Eddie Munson? They have... pretty great fics, guys. As in some true 'chef's kiss' grade smut lol.

2: First Ever Ship... Puppyshipping (Seto Kaiba/Joey Wheeler) from Yu-gi-oh 100%. Closely followed by Dragonshipping... who.. um, guys, is practically canon if you rewatch it, which I think is hilarious. Like, WATCH THE DARK SIDE OF DIMENSIONS MOVIE. OMG. Joey gets saved by this man and is legit trying not to sob to Yugi over the fact he was in love with his alter ego bahhahahahah. Anyway though, just something about puppyshipping.... the low hanging fruit of it, I never stood a chance. Like OMG, it was my GATEWAY DRUG! Do I see how unrealistic and problematic it is as a grow woman? You bet I do... do I look back on it fondly? It is my first love <3

3: Last song.... Hm. About Love by MARINA. So pretty and nice to hear her newer stuff. And, NO, I didn't find it from the movie everyone keeps talking about. I never saw it, I found this the old fashion way... hearing it on the radio at my place of employment lol.

4: Last Movie.... Lephrechaun 4: IN SPACE! HAHAKJBKJBASJKBD I am watching ALL of them for the first time, and they are so so beautiful. Like...SO BAD. SO GOOD!!!!!

5: Currently reading... Um, like, ALL the family feels fanfiction of the TMNT 2012 brothers I can get my hands on. Can't stress enough that I am NOT shipping this. FA-MI-LY fics, okay?? Family is my weakness! Why do you think I love talking about Dream's messed up family and making my own crack content??

6: Currently watching... Actually, I'm finally going back and watching ALL of Steven Universe because I never did when it aired. I remember it getting really heavy and, at the time, I just didn't have the emotional bandwidth for it. Now, however, I am literally chugging its traumatic plot lines like I'm rushing at a frat house. Sobbing the entire time alone in my room. Loving EVERY second of it hahah!

7: Currently eating... Nothing :c

8: Currently Craving... Not gonna lie. I'd murder for a muffin rn. Oh, and more fanfiction of like... everything I have on my docket. Like...please? I need it like oxygen? On a desert island, I would request food, water, and more fanfiction.

And now for the embarrassing moment where I display how little I actually have on this app. Tagging some people that have been on my wall lately :) (no pressure!): @purplexiasphinx, @crxssingtherubic0n, @turrondeluxe, @synnesai