#also if you ask me where this is you are going in the Void (I took some liberties and also I am NOT looking at maps. too hard to draw rn!!)
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LADS Xavier: Horror Games | SFW Drabble
Had this idea earlier chatting with the group. Just. Xavier things. Cute boi. Happy guy. I love him. Also this is completely unedited so you're welcome in advance. Typos are a paid actor in my works.
Pairings: Xavier x Reader Warnings: Horror Games Disclaimer: This is an original fan work for “Love and Deepspace”. Do not repost on other platforms or plagiarize. All characters shown in this fic is 18+.
Blog Information | Masterlist
Xavier
Technically speaking, this had all been your idea. You had seen a new horror game that had just come out and were itching to play it. The only issue was the fact that you tended to clam up while playing scary games, so you opted to simply watch.
Which ended up with you here, sitting on the couch with Xavier. Your legs were touching under the blanket as you leaned into him, watching the screen with interest.
He had a casual expression on his face, clearly enjoying playing the game as his fingers fiddled with the controls. He was doing well despite it not being a combat-based game, and he was quick to figure out a few of the puzzles.
Your issue was his bravery. He never hesitated to do anything in this game. This meant it was going by faster than you expected, and the deeper he got into the game, the worse it got. Your heart already felt like it was going to pound out of your chest as you jumped slightly at some of the background ambiance in the game. Your hand bunched up his white hoodie, and he looked over at you for a moment.
"Are you still doing okay?" he asked, noticing how terrified you looked. He was just about to go through one of the doors of the game, and you were now squirming.
"Can you not open that door?" you finally said, your words coming out hurriedly as you stared at the screen. This was one of those horror games where the protagonist opened the door at an agonizingly slow pace, basically peering into the void for a second before fully opening it.
"You mean the door I need to open in order to progress the story?" he asked with a slight chuckle. He had obviously noticed how high-strung you had gotten during the game. It was hard to hide the way you flinched or almost whimpered whenever something scary happened on the screen.
"Ya, I feel like something scary is on the other side of it." You confessed, your eyes still locked on the screen. Xavier gently placed the controller down on his lap.
"Is our brave hunter scared of a few pixels on the screen?" He asked, his tone now teasing. Seeing how the controller was no longer in his hand gave you the confidence to look at him, a small cowl on your face.
"It's not my fault this game is terrifying." You huffed, crossing your arms. You guessed it did come with the territory of being a horror game, but still. You hadn't expected him to breeze through it and get to every single scary quick time event the game had to offer in the three hours he had been playing it.
Xavier chuckled, going to cup your cheek and tug on it, "It's alright, I promise, I'll protect you if anything decides to leave the TV and get to you." The thought had you whining at the mental image it provided. The terrifying monster crawled out of the TV, head twisted at an awkward angle as his crab walked over to you, the bones creaking...god, now you were freaking yourself out.
"Xavie, I want to be able to sleep tonight, you know." You complained, knowing he was doing this on purpose. He would often try to scare you just to see your reactions. How horror never really seemed to bother him was beyond your comprehension.
"That's fine; you can just sleep in my bed tonight. I can protect you better if you're in my arms." He said, and you blushed slightly. It wasn't like it was uncommon to share a bed with him; you two were dating for a while.
"I dunno; it might take more than that to make me comfortable enough to sleep." You murmured.
Xavier hummed as he thought, "Then how about...after we finish for the night, we get some warm milk, watch some cat videos on your phone, and then I'll read you a story in bed to help you fall asleep better?"
His offer was a good one, and it had you smiling, "Alright, deal...on one condition." You held out a single finger, and Xavier smiled, waiting for you to finish your thought, "Tomorrow morning, you wake up early enough to go to that diner across the street so I can get a greasy breakfast sandwich."
"You mean so we can get greasy breakfast sandwiches?" He corrected you, and now you were giggling.
"Ya, so we can do that together. Do we have a deal?"
"You drive a hard bargain," He began, then held out his hand to shake yours, "But I accept as long as you don't wake me up before the sun rises."
"Like I'd be awake by then anyway," You shook his hand, his grip tight on you as he dragged you into his embrace. He was now pulling you closer onto his lap, settling you between his legs. His arms wrapped around your waist as he clicked on the controller to resume the game.
"Alright, but first, we have to go through this door."
"W-wait, Xavier, no," And just as you predicted, there was something scary on the other side, and sadly, Xavier learned the hard way not to rest his chin on the head of someone who jumped when scared. Thankfully for him, he healed fast. Sadly for you...well, at least he kissed the top of your head.
#loveanddeepspace#love and deepspace#Xavier Love and Deepspace#Lnds#Lnds Xavier#lnds x reader#x reader#reader insert#xavier x reader#l&ds#l&ds xavier#l&ds xavier x reader#lads x reader#lads xavier#lads xavier x reader
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Hello , I hope you see this.
I might be a bit desperate.
So 2 years ago I wanted to kill myself but then I had a huge “spiritual awakening” where I say things beyond human comprehension. And from that moment I decided to give life a chance, I knew that life actually had a meaning and that was for me to discover what was beyond what I could think. It gave my so much clarity of the world around me and who I was. From that moment I also started to randomly consciously manifest things without knowing about manifesting. I’m not kidding when I say this but in that time I manifested 6 million overnight while I was just kidding about being a millionaire while listening to my rich music and then when I woke up my parents had the good news. I also manifested others things that I thought where extremely special. But I didn’t really put in effort it was just fun experimenting with my powers.
So then I decided to deepen myself in the laws. I started with law of attraction. And I ended up meditating so deeply everyday that I was so passionate about finding the ultimate truth of reality inside me, that I was extremely depersonalised from my 3D and basically lived inside my brain. I could ask things and receive answers on my questions, like the one time i asked how to invent something that could end humanity ( I still have a full doc on how to build to most effective machine that could end humanity in less than second) I also got the answer of questions about reality and my vessel. So that’s when I realised there was nothing but me. And that I was experiencing myself from the experience of myself ( if that makes sense!) I found that there really was nothing and everything at once while I was giving meaning to it. So that’s when I started with extreme anxiety and depression because I struggled so much with intrusive thoughts, not being able to ground myself in this reality and being so so scared of my thoughts. Still to this day my thoughts scare me so much that I can’t help but experience anything other than fear from myself. It’s like I’m living in a constant nightmare. I have watched so much law of assumption post and videos dedicating every second of my day on being focused and disciplined to affirming and being in the state of having what I want, but it makes me so fuckiyn angry and I don’t know why. Everytime I see a post I feel depressed because deep down I know everything but everyday I wake up in the same reality where everything fucking sucks ( I have been forcing myself to be kind self love gratitude letting go void state visualisation whatever exist I’ve done it all) and when I finally have build up that trust that everything is working out in my highest favour and I always get what I want and the 3D can’t tell me nothing yk I can delude myself into knowing I have it but it’s been over a year and I just can’t bear this reality anymore I know I’m meant for another reality and there’s just nothing for me to find here anymore. And I really don’t know what to do anymore I feel like I’m stuck in this reality where everything seems to get worse. And my thoughts are also getting worded everyday for the last year but whenever I tried manifesting a better self concept mindset etc it got worse when i don’t even want to be the person that is in conflict with themsef because that’s just a idiotic thing to do. But can you help me out?🫶
what you experienced, everything that you learned, was so profound. it is truly a gift to have such insight, so treat it as such. try to examine why it scares you so deeply. there is something within that fear that is asking to be understood.
you have seen how effortlessly you created before, simply by being playful and detached. you were experimenting, having fun with it, and not placing too much importance on the outcome. that is why there was no resistance. things flowed into your reality flawlessly. you already understand the law. you know how to apply it to your life. you do not need another blog post or video to teach you what you already know.
what you need now is to go deeper within yourself, to truly understand why you feel this way. these feelings are not here to torment you but to guide you toward something deeper. perhaps there is a message waiting for you, something significant you need to uncover, or even a realization that you are meant to share with others. your emotions, no matter how overwhelming, are part of your journey. they may be pointing you toward a greater understanding of yourself and your purpose.
if you feel an inner pull to create something meaningful, to express yourself, or to pursue something that sparks joy, do not ignore it. act on it. even if it feels small or insignificant at first, do it. follow what excites you, even in the simplest of ways.
i know it’s easier said than done, especially when it feels like the weight of the world is on your shoulders. but remember, we both know the truth—what we focus on expands. even a small shift in focus toward what you prefer can create change. we often feel so much these days that we forget to acknowledge what we can be grateful for. take a moment and ask yourself: what are you truly grateful for right now? your family, your friends? doesn’t it bring you some happiness to know you’ve learned so much already? i am not saying you are ungrateful. i am suggesting that maybe starting with gratitude, even in the smallest way, could help shift your attention, even just a little.
as you take time for introspection to truly understand what is behind these emotions and why you feel the way you do, you might also set some goals for yourself. try doing something that excites you, even if it’s small. i know this reality can feel limiting, and maybe that’s why you feel like you don’t belong here. but if you see it as a curse, then that’s the experience you will live out.
what if you see it as an opportunity to discover something profound within yourself? what if the very limitations you feel are only reflections of the state you’re currently in, waiting for you to shift?
you don't have to force yourself to change everything all at once. just start small, day by day.
you already know how powerful you are.
#law of assumption#neville goddard#self concept#loa#loablr#affirm and persist#reality shifting#desired reality#manifestation#manifesting#law of attraction#shifting#consciousness#spiritual awakening
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“‘S normal for Soldier to be the first one to wake up, but he usually sends Scout over to wake me - 'n this one was really early, even for ol' Jane. He held out his helmet to me, upside down - had a little gray fox cub in it!”
Hello hi I am Not Dead!! Finals are just kicking my ass at the moment! Despite that, I really wanted to draw this post made by my favorite Sniper blog I’ve had the delight to interact with, @leadshootingcupid !!! (GIVE HIM A FOLLOW ASK HIM AND HIS TEAM QUESTIONS RAAAAAAH GENUINELY THE MOST IN-CHARACTER ASKBLOGS I’VE SEEN!!!) Had a BLAST drawing this and actually doing a background for once! Now to never do it again-
#I had a version with sniper’s glasses but it looked kinda weird so you get this one <3#also if you ask me where this is you are going in the Void (I took some liberties and also I am NOT looking at maps. too hard to draw rn!!)#fuck o clock in the morning implies like 4am but the scene didn’t look right without some lighting. also pretty highlights ooooo~#So so proud of this piece!!!! I’m very happy with it :3#ok gotta stop rambling. I’m going directly to bed after this. a mimir#tf2#team fortress 2#team fortress two#sniper tf2#soldier tf2#bush art#SHIT I FORGOT MY WATERMARK AGAIN. FUCK. I’mnot gonn.a fix that gnighht
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Today, our firm hosted a CLE about mental health and substance abuse in the legal profession. It was a well-done presentation, trying to fit the breadth of a decades-long systemic issue into a neat PowerPoint while keeping it at only one hour long (not .1 more or .1 less).
It feels like a pointless uphill battle. You're asked to make 2100 billed hours per year (or more). As a junior associate you need to achieve perfection - but you don't even know where the standard is, not yet, you're too new and you're trying your best. You're asked to attend non-billable CLEs and networking events and participate in bar associations and look ahead to business development and go out with your colleagues and socialize with clients in non-billable events and. and. and. You know who at the firm is an alcoholic - maybe you are too. You laugh at jokes about online gambling - you know the partner who gambled away his last paycheck, and he's laughing. You know who's filing for their third divorce. Who's about to lose the kids. Who missed their son's state-level championship game because they had a call with a prospective client (he won't forget, he'll never forget).
But they ask you to take care of your mental health (but you're chastised if you don't respond to the 1am email from the partner within 10 minutes). But they ask you to take care of your physical health (but there's a beer fridge in the break room). But they ask you to practice well-being (but they expect you on-call 24/7). But they tell you to get enough sleep (but the junior associate got less than an hour because of the partner's poor planning). But you need to look out for signs of mental health concerns in your peers (but you're also thinking about dying).
I could write a novel on this. Many attorneys have written similar ramblings, articles, studies, surveys, so I don't really need to. It's a problem. But there's been no real attempts at change. Sure, yes, there's awareness. But billable demands keep rising. So do standards in not just federal court, but state court. But you're at a firm that pays so well you'll endure whatever demands they put on you because that's just too damn good to lose. But you feel like shit every day. But- hey, well, the partner has been doing this for 45 years now. Why can't you?
#not sure where I was going with this#I have too many thoughts on the issues with the legal profession#and how I'm both suffering from them and feeding them#real lawblr#why yes I'm at a litigation boutique why do you ask#took a break from writing a proposed stipulation to rant at the endless void of tumblr#thanks for all the boops today tumblawyers#actual rant of the day beyond this overall gripe with the profession#is being told both 'know the facts inside and out' but also 'you can't bill the client for so much time'#like idk I'm sorry that putting literally ten thousand pages of documents into a neatly-done five-page chronology took me a week#if you want perfection it demands the time#maybe it's beccause I'm not as smart or as sharp as the other fucking attorneys here who knows#but I'm not making the mistake I made last month again#write off my fucking time if you have to#you want perfection? it. takes. time. and I fucking gave that to you.
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CAUSE THIS IS THRILLER (bark), THRILLER (bark) NIGHT
Usopp's outfit is so funny for reals
He got the whole squad laughing
Luffy enablers at it again.... (Robin.... I know.....)
The humor panels so far have been so good!!! God this arc is so funny
HE SAID IT‼️‼️
They look like birds 😭😭
It's just too good... luffy taking cerberus and zombies what can't he do
It's just banger after banger what can I say
Franky feeling for other people because of his guilt complex and sanji lying through his teeth and pulling out the women excuse to seem unaffected... yeah
Look at them.... look how they ate
Omg joyboy reference?? (No)
Sanji is rubbing off on usopp.... also chopper noticing that is sogeking's weapon akdhaksjak
ANOTHER SLAY!!!!!
Their priorities: I'm not strong enough, there isn't enough food, and nami isn't here
Franky going from wanting to kill brook for his jokes to making a joke like his after he hears his backstory... exactly (Robin was already enabling him before the backstory even fdagjsfha)
Sanji is altering his body and actually being on fire to communicate to us how fucking mad he is..... I need more of him going insane I do I do
My god what is he doing ALDJALAJALA
AHSAHAHQHAH THEY ARE THE SAME!!! naaah sanji wouldn't force a woman to be his wife
You cant see me but I am nodding my head in agreement over and over
You don't understand he altered his body to communicate to us how mad he is. He inploded himself and then reconstituted again. Those germa 66 genes are insane
You tell em usopp!!!! The first of many girls you've scared into defeat!!! Akdjqknql
Zoro zombie regressed to not trusting robin akdjaks he's still in there
ROBI-CHO SUPLEX??? HELL YEAAAAAH
There is zosa- [GUNSHOT GUNSHOT GUNSHOT GUNSHOT]
Super frapper gong.... he is doing combo shots with frobin... omg.... parents....
Everything is so fun I'm having such a good time reading.... and then zosan angst like damn I am being fed well here
#in the anime the guys didn't say they wanted to die aldjlajala for the kids luffy just wants to turn into a clam#thriller bark is so funny.... 'worst arc' my ass.... it's funny as hell and then we get zosan angst. best thing ever#same with skypiea but there we got really nice relationships betwen characters and nolan x calgara homoeroticism for the ages#and LORE for the ages. not like the kuma incident won't be talked about in the history books but yeah#everyone calling absalom perv salom... yeah#sanji in that fucking penguin never gets old.... also HELLO LOLA#moira fought against kaido and lost akdjsksnks is that why he became a warlord? just like whitebeard defeated crocodile?? out of spite??#also what is the land of ice where moira got oars? he also mentioned it before too... i thot he was referring to ryuma so it was wano but n#the legend of the continent puller who built a nation of villains.... okay okay oars....#oars was killed 500 years ago.... ✍️✍️ this somehow feels important bc of its closeness to the void century etc#zombie luffy oars wanting sanjis food.... 🚬🚬🚬 of course.....#oars luffy maintaining his dream... yeah yeah. also namis outfits for this arc are so sickening.... i miss them already#the zombie generals being at absalom's wedding... thats so funny..#luffy oars is so funny aldjslsn just making himself a hat and steering his giant ship... of course#you guys think they are going to make sanji mad about the clear clear fruit in the opla or completely ignore it bc his reasoning is bad#like it makes sense with the wci backstory it does but that would be spoilers lmao. so its either he wants to peep on women or nothing#i love the greek chorus of the two zombies telling the audience how they are both as bad in that regard. amazing#did ryuma use french for his attack.... there is zosan everywhere for tho-[GUNSHOTS]#zombie ryuma's design is also cool as hell.... his blood is literally fire.... come on now....#also zoro says he wants to act like this fight didnt happen... is that why he says fuck all in wano to hiyori? damn. he said i put shame#in you and your country but i will keep it quiet bc you gave me a cool sword and fight and i am actually so honorable. thats him yeah...#zombie zoro and sanji remaining tfait being that they hate (love fighting) each other... there is zosa-[GUNSHOT GUNSHOT GUNSHOT]#i forgot how much oars destroyed them... after enies lobby they seem untouchable but without their captain there... the gears are turning..#also btw i cannot believe im gonna get an answer about why the skypieans and the shandians have wings. thats insane#i am enjoying luffy oars so much it is so fun. trying to enjoy it bc i know i won't be laughing anymore once sabaody kicks in.... fuck me..#usopp and franky wanting to wait for luffy to beat oars down but zoro and sanji know... and they will KNOW soon enough....#i forgor kuma asked about ace to nami... what is going on. kuma coming from the warlord meeting too.... did he want to warn him??#he wanted to inform moria about balckbeard becoming a warlord omg here we go.... also moria being racist towards kuma hello???#and he strictly follows the government.... until here bc he lets luffy go.... christ.... he asks about ace bc he knew what blackbeard did..#reading one piece
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I am truly finding your descent into the utter madness that is joongdunk very entertaining. Probably because I get you. I only discovered them a few months ago and now I am swimming deep in the trenches of their lore. And I am loving every moment of it. I want to share my joy with you because you seem to be having a great time too.
I am the anon who sent you the mv and short film ask btw. I'm sorry I forgot to mention the horror aspect of the short film.
I fell in love with joongdunk dynamics, both on and off screen. On screen, I love the way they portray their characters. Off screen, I love the way they interact with each other. They are just so hilarious and wholesome. I guess my favorite part about them is how Joong feels comfortable enough to completely let go and be his most unhinged and crazy self with Dunk, and Dunk just accepts all of it without batting an eyelash. I love that while all of their antics are absolutely hilarious, you can also clearly feel the genuine love and respect they have for each other.
Sorry for the long rant, I truly am deep in my joongdunk feels lately. Feel free to reach out if you want to discuss more joongdunk. And thank you for sharing your journey.
Hello!! Its lovely to meet you and yes thank you for both feeding and empathising with my tumble into the joongdunk abyss xD
Oh no worries! I mean I figured it had to be horror themed given it was a Halloween project but I just did not expect them to go that hard with it. It has all the hallmarks I associate with the (very few) Asian horror movies I've seen in my life and there's something especially terrifying about them (vs Western horror films). Which speaks to the genuine effort that was poured into that pet project but also its nice to see them doing something outside of the college romance zone since that's all I've seen from them so far.
Ohhhh I love that insight about Joong feeling like he can be completely himself around Dunk. *O* I mean the man does seem to have the most minimal filter on the best of days and Dunk literally is never ever phased by any of it. Its amazing to watch in the best way.
Also its peak comedy when Dunk does something to make Joong speechless. Usually its also something that makes me think, "guys, you're on camera right now?? shouldn't this be in private??" like the time he got (fake?) mad about Joong sleeping over at a friend's house and got all pouty about not being informed/implied that he thought he thought Joong was only sleeping at his house. xD And Joong was left just like O 3O and not really knowing what to say. xD
I'm still very far from getting a sense of their personalties and characters. I can tell they're incredibly affectionate (as individuals) and that Joong at least is very physically expressive about it. But I want to watch some of their longer interviews to get a feel for what they're actually like, y'know?? Any recommendations?
Also omgosh please do not feel sorry, this is blanket permission to rant at me about JoongDunk and their shows and their projects or whatever else is tangentially related to them. I'm already bought in. xD I was on the fence until I watched SIMM and despite its flaws it still made me feel ALL THE FEELS and most of that was just the sheer intensity that JoongDunk brought to their on-screen moments.
#ask#joongdunk#also you should never feel sorry about talking to much i ramble SO MUCH but where else am i going to put all these thoughts if not for here#like i'm actually so grateful for you and the other person(s??) who have been feeding me jd content because (a) i have a lot to discover#and (b) its the best way to learn about something#(c) its nice to know i'm not alone screaming into the void about them >w<#also just putting this out there idk if anyone in the jd sphere is also a fp fan but pls come talk to me omg#i feel like joong and fort have some very specific things in common that zing through my brain but i can't tell if its just the eyebrows xD
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ok which one of you fuckers is going to write the sky high au where cellbit is warren peace and roier is layla williams or am i the only one here who's that flavor of crazy
#qsmp#shut up vic#block game brainrot#idk why i've just been thinking abt it#not enough to do it myself mind. but still.#guapoduo#spiderbit#man what are their tags i genuinely don't know#i just kinda wanna toss this into the void and hope it lands in somebody's lap and explodes like a pipe bomb#subsequently ruining their life#anyway it's 4 am sorry guys#qsmp roier#qsmp cellbit#good enough#also i KNOW they (warren&layla) are not the canon couple but look me in the eyes#they're canon to ME#in what world does milquetoast flighty idiot will stronghold deserve layla#i mean COME ON#sorry this is not a hot take if you disagree i'm going to disembowel you#fuckjng forgot to even mention that in the og post bc my brain fully does not comprehend that this isn't canon#brother ASK ME if i care ASK ME the answer is no. it's canon sorryyyyy#sorry this is where that 4am is coming in ahaha
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Looks like that video is about a month & a half after The Trade and trevors broken ankle 😣
re: this video… anon 😭 i had suspicions but it is so much worse to have them confirmed that really was like. trevor’s first Public Appearance without jamie AND post-broken ankle which is traumatic in and of itself no wonder every beat reporter was like ‘oh yeah trevor’s just devastated’
wouldn’t you be miserable too if your best friend just got traded and your body betrayed you and what if it was maybe all your fault!!!
#bestie thank you so much for fact-checking me 🙏🙏🥰🥰 i love when y’all come in my inbox & answer the questions i yell into the void of my tag#we are Suffering about trevor TOGETHER in this house. if i scrolled all the way to the bottom of my drafts i think i could find even more#heartbreaking content from before The Trade but we don’t need to suffer that much otherwise the penguin cup of tea is really irish coffee#confirms ALL of my theories about miserable trevor leaning into mason for comfort because in some universes that’s THEIR boyfriend who left#liv in the replies#trevor zegras#mason mctavish#need to go lay on the floor about this one folks. do you think trevor said he would only do it if mason came if he could sit next to mason#right at the end where people were rushing out not stopping to talk tired by the end of the line and not even thinking just to guarantee he#wouldn’t get asked anything because he still has a hard time believing it’s real he keeps thinking jamie’ll be there especially w/his ankle#i’m sure he doesn’t have a great time with stairs so he probably will nap on the couch sometimes and that moment right when he first wakes#up to the bang of the door and he doesn’t quite know he’s awake yet and he thinks it’s jamie coming in? heartbreaker right there bud. sorry#ALSO because I can’t say it and leave it alone I almost put that last bit strictly in the tags but like. there’s gotta be some part of#trevor that knows it’s nothing to do with him but still naïvely believes that if he’d maybe been there if he hadn’t been injured things#could have worked out differently if he’d been there and it’s his fault his ankle broke and do you remember all the interviews jamie gave#about how you never think you’ll be traded and how strange it is to be moving and now i need you to take that naïveté times 1000 for trevor#who of course he never even pictures jamie leaving they were building the core together!!! why would they ever get rid of him!! and if only#trevor had been there to show how important jamie was. what would he have done? literally nothing but that does not stop the emotional guil#from enveloping trevor like a rain cloud and making him sit in mason’s apartment with ice cream bowl in hand. holistic treatment l
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Hey folks, got another something to consider here, especially in regards to the safety of minors in adult spaces.
Let me preface:
I started off with having computer access as early as 4 years old. Granted, it was purely on the children's games my parents would set up for me on the living room computer, and I didn't even know how to click because all the games required was you hovering over your choice with your cursor.
However, because I was thick in the nest of neglect- what with one of my parents working constant, back-to-back overtime, the other unable to give a damn- this set me up for catastrophe.
To play Devil's Advocate, both of my parents were immigrants who still, to this day, struggle with their own Internet usage because they just don't understand the severe consequences and ramifications of putting things online. Their home cultures didn't even HAVE the kind of tech Americans in the 70s-90s had, due to war, poverty, and manipulated economy.
It was only when they immigrated that they realized computers weren't exclusively for Westerners, and for the few scientists/politicians in their countries lucky enough to be entrusted.
However, there is no denying that, without parental supervision nor adult attention, I sought out what I needed elsewhere. What was more convenient than having that at the push of a button?
Just like them, I didn't know better.
Unlike them, it was because I was a child.
Because I was a child, unfortunately, I was ripe for the picking. You name it, I lived it. All the way down to almost being trafficked, by the same person who had been thick in primary school when I wasn't even born yet.
Thankfully, times are different now, and awareness of these issues has never been more prevalent. There are helplines, in-school education on Internet safety and abuse, and then some.
In addition, many adults- myself included- don't feel comfortable engaging in minor-targeted spaces, let alone with minors period.
Whether it's out of respect, out of traumatic experience, or other reasons, it doesn't matter as long as it isn't a harmful one (i.e "I hate kids", which yes, IS considerably harmful, as someone who heard such constantly as a child and thus felt less safe to tell adults about the abuse).
This leaves us adults to create our own spaces, where we often do and say things that are adult-oriented. Again, this is perfectly fine, as long as there is no harm coming from it.
What is not fine is how- despite the abundance of awareness and caution- there are minors who will sadly undergo a repeat of the cycle in our spaces. All despite the prevalent messaging of "keep minors out of adult spaces," and how many of us adults have some form of "Minors DNI" on our pages.
Again, having been there myself, I completely understand that neglect of ANY kind can make one look to the outside world instead of further into their unreliable inside group. Being alone, or even isolated/sheltered, is an inherently anti-social experience that our social animal brains cannot handle without succumbing to dissociation, "acting out," etc.
As children especially, we are wired to rely on adult attention for survival, and we do experience extreme psychological distress when that necessity isn't met.
Nevertheless, it truly is imperative for minors to understand the following:
Adults on the Internet will NEVER be a safe replacement for your own parents, families, guardians, teachers, etc.
Even if an adult is well-intentioned and otherwise on their best behaviour, there is no guarantee that their friends are the same. Digital abuse can, and does, often start by proxy, especially in fandoms.
We created these adult spaces to keep YOU safe. It is not an exclusive club that we are gatekeeping you from. You can join of your own accord once you're 18 or over.
This isn't to victim blame, nor to shame minors for seeking out what they should have been given since they were born.
There is a reason why it's up to adults to check ages, to make sure their age-restricted servers are watertight (which they never can be, so long as someone out there is being dishonest about their age/ID), and to avoid privately messaging minors period.
All the same, it's also up to minors to learn how to keep themselves safe. Not to the point of paranoia- you too will be an adult one day- but to the point of being able to protect yourself as both child and adult.
After all, predation doesn't stop once a fawn has grown into a deer, and adult protective services exist for good reason.
So, instead, minors ought to:
Seek out well-moderated spaces that are curated for minors with the safety of minors in mind (note: avoid self-proclaimed youth cults like the plague).
Learn what makes a safe friend and an unsafe one (i.e learn about the signs of abuse).
Never be afraid to block anyone who gives you The Ick (i.e gut feeling), especially if they're an adult or otherwise age ambiguous.
If someone makes you feel unsafe, tell a moderator ASAP, or simply block + report them. If you aren't taken seriously, escalate to their supervisor, and even go straight to the top if need be.
And 5., the most important:
If someone has committed a crime against you, DO NOT POST IT ONLINE, EVEN TO WARN OTHERS. REPORT TO YOUR LOCAL AUTHORITY ASAP.
If you do so and THEN go to the authorities, you will either not be taken seriously due to perceived ulterior motives on your part (ex. your post gaining significant external attention), or you could get into legal trouble yourself if failure to report and/or smear laws exist in your country.
As well, if you do report it- whether or not you're taken seriously, they have to make a case file by law and you must enforce your right to as much- the authorities will pick up on the pattern if ANOTHER victim makes their own report, and will hopefully escalate the situation then.
You can still denounce the actions and inactions of your local authorities, and use their services in a time of duress because they are the ONLY authority that has the resources to do something about it. You are not a hypocrite for keeping yourself safe and alive, and it's not your fault that alternative options do not exist.
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Though it always is up to adults to be responsible around minors, only YOU can curate your own Internet experience.
The block button is your bestest friend.
Use it well and use it often.
Cheers, thanks for reading, and be safe. 💜
#vee vibrates#youth liberation#youth rights#My skin still crawls from that one case where a 9 y.o used their mom's ID to get into an 1.8+ server and got groōmed into sending nůdes.#Please keep yourselves safe and trust me when I say that it's not worth the severe trauma + chronic illnesses you WILL undoubtedly face.#No amount of adult validation will EVER fill that void your parents left in you BELIEVE me. You have to fill it yourself unfortunately.#Sidenote but having to reparent myself after all of this fucking sucksssssss but we live and we learn and we survive and we thrive.#I'm just grateful that I have a support network that helped not only close that hungry void but fill it with love & care.#digital abuse tw#trafficking tw#neglect tw#Ask to tag & yes minors can reblog my advocacy tags as long as they don't go looking through my blog. 💜#grooming tw#long post#Also posts* not tags hlgjfjflffh I am. Exhausted after writing this post lol the bad memories mannnnnnnnn.....
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…void lore?
I AM GLAD YOU ASKED
No, the thing is just that I'm a huge fan of Void lore. I began my fanfic journey extensively worldbuilding Void in the HK universe. Dreams is entirely a field for me to work in all of my Void lore. (Your earlier tag gave me the inspo to draft the dialogue for the Void chapter BTW, thank you sm) Dreams was created as a Void lore playground. I give the Void a big role to play in every fic. I add Void lore to everything I write, almost. I scream at the mention of other people's Void lore. Void mention was nearly enough to drag me back into playing WoW again. I'm the Void lore guy.
Void lore Void lore Void lore Void lore---
(/lh)
#answered asks#the-moth-from-elsewhere#im just that meme#where you mention a thing to me and i pull out a stack of papers and go “would you like me to elaboratr on this”#i have a lil void lore fic also#its uhhh#laws of life will stay laws of death they mock#generally really proud of my void lore. tho most of it remains unseen (for now)#it just gets the gears turning
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I have been thinking So Much about immortal Exile and Revan (because getting cut off from the thing that binds all living things in the way she did messed up Meetra's connection to mortality, and the sith magic kinda stuck to Revan)
Because like...they're tragic lesbians; they just fly around being Space Mums together; Meetra gets to watch and nourish the order she planted the seeds for grow into something beautiful and better than the order that exiled her; Revan gets to enact the social justice she justly deserves to enact; they're both incredibly powerful but the millennia of time they have lived had limited how much they access it
(Also then Meetra gets to play an actual part in the swtor storyline and I can and will get into that if asked)
(I will also talk about my swtor OCs, I've been playing that game all week after a few months hiatus and I am once again Obsessed)
But back to the immortality AU - Meetra is Yoda's teacher, and also Tarre Vizsla's (although that one is kinda a joint effort between her and Revan)
Meetra goes through Exile Arc 2: Electric Boogaloo after she gives the order to Bastila, and starts travelling the edge of the galaxy, searching for a sign of Revan but also slightly drowning herself in her Perpetual Self-Hatred™ until one of the swtor MCs finds her and drags her back into Galactic Politics
I haven't read enough high republic to know how they'd affect that yet lol
#anyway lots of thoughts#Satele - in a world where Revan is a woman - is still the descendant of Revan and Bastila#but also of Carth as his daughter with Revan got together with Bastila's son (w/ an unknown father)#and started that particular lineage#do I have other thoughts?#yes#but I'm about to go to bed so if you want to hear them send me an ask#or smth#and I'll ramble some more in the morning#Female Revan#Revan#Jedi Exile#Meetra Surik#KotOR#SWtOR#Fae Rambles Into The Void#Immortality AU
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I seem to have a horrid habit of focusing on world building instead of the stories! That said, have some facts abt both stories and their worlds!!
A Seer of Secrets
All four celestial monkeys know of each other’s existence (obvs). But the Long-Armed Gibbon and the Red Buttock Baboon have ultimately decided that dealing w Macaque and Wukong is NOT worth it. Good choice LMAO
Demon courting is kind of weird. Female demons tend to be more aggressive with courting
Speaking of courting, kidnapping is part of it but it’s consensual. Well… nowadays it is. But you don’t realize it because they disguise it as an “I’m surprise visiting you… and now we’re going to my house. Pack a week's worth of clothes.”
Seers and Oracles usually have an item or symbol that connects them to divinity. I wonder what Seer’s item is.
Demon food is USUALLY spicy. For some reason, MK and Mei can withstand it but Wukong lowkey struggles? He doesn’t question it much. They're a weird duo.
There's this huge ass under-market for demons. I'm talking multiple districts kind of big. It's based on the five phases of Chinese philosophy. So you've got Fire, Water, Wood, Gold, and Earth. The District levels go in order as the inter-promoting direction... Or generating direction (I wanted to feel fancy). So it goes Wood, Fire, Earth, Metal, and then Water. But it's in this big circle that spirals upwards. It's pretty cool because the transition from the Water District to the Wood District is by a massive waterfall that has these big rock platforms that act like an elevator. So, it's kind of tapping into the whole "controls" thing of the uhhhh.... inter-regulating part.
Speaking of the districts, there is ONE place that is considered pure neutral territory. And that would be the Earth section. Simply because Earth is meant to represent " patience, thoughtfulness, practicality, hard work, and stability." This is also where demons can find items that can help with healing 'n their abilities! It's where most markets are set up due to the unspoken truce.
The Wood and Fire district tends to get... really heated. Especially in the Fire District. The space between Wood and Fire is highly populated. So a lot of fighting happens and it's considered far enough from the Earth District. This is where demons like to just... bust out the moves and get into nasty fights. So if you can survive running through the Fire District (where there are a lot of fights over territory) and to Earth, consider yourself lucky. And fucked, because the moment you step out of the Earth District, someone is on your ass.
Water isn't exactly where demons live. It's more of a uh... "If I can't be on the surface for a hot moment or so, I can chill here and not be bothered" kind of place. But it's usually for those real big hot-shot guys. So the Demon Bull Family, for example.
You Were Nothing Like Me
You guys don't understand. I have almost 5,000 words on the doc. That's more than ASOS, sadly.
Everyone's names are based on Constellations because I'm unoriginal. The only people who aren't are the brothers... And Queen Astra, who is Outertale Toriel.
The Void? Yes, it's sentient. It lets Gaster be an invisible guiding hand.
It also oddly likes chocolate.
Monsters know ASL. This is because of a bunch of ASL content being found-- why was it in the dumpster? Who knows! But it's benefited the monster community, and it's gotten the favor of the Deaf Community! Because they're more accepting than others.
I made three official holidays for Monsters and pulled the names out of my fucking ass at 3 AM. Gyftmas, of course, exist. It happens on the Third of every December. Monsters originally guessed based on the crystals in Waterfall. Which would dim during the summer and brighten up during the winter. The brightest day just so happens to be the third Wednesday of December without fail. Why do the crystals dim during the summer? Because monster magic, despite being beneath the ground for literal centuries, accommodated the heat by glowing brighter. Why does glowing brighter help? Because why not. It's like when fireflies come out during May and June. Because. Day of Silence is a pretty somber day. It is a-- uh-- a day dedicated to the Royal Family and their lost children. Most monsters take this day off and mourn the fallen prince and child. It's said that you can hear their souls mourning throughout the underground... Said sound gets louder when the fusion of Outertale happens. Yup. Sunset Feast is a really happy one. It's the day the barrier broke! Because woohoo, freedom. Their version of the 4th of July. So, fun fact about this holiday. Frisk broke the barrier the same fucking day it was created. And it, thus, replaced the old holiday Feast of Darkness. Anyways, Sunset Feast is where monsters gather near a large clearing that's by the entrance of Ebott and-- uh-- watch the sunset! Big feast, too. Really fun and loud! Lots of music 'n stuff.
Who named those holidays, you ask? Not Asgore. That's for fucking sure. Not with his shitty naming skills. It was actually Toriel, who named them. I refuse to believe both of them had shitty naming skills. Toriel was good at naming things because I said so.
Typhas, or known as water sausages, have three different forms. You have Snow Typhas, which are commonly closer to Snowdin, and are pretty sweet! They're actually used to making icing or Nice Cream. You also have Spice Typhas, which are closer to HotLands and are used as a spice! The spiciest part of Spice Typhas are the seeds, kind of like peppers!
Depending on where you're at in the underground, you get unique currency. Gold is the overarching one, but sometimes you gotta make some fun unique ones. The Ruins doesn't have currency minus gold. They like to bargain and trade. Snowdin uses Milky Quartz. Waterfall uses Water Opals. HotLand uses Rubies. The Core uses Quartz. The Castle uses Sapphires. And the Court and Royal Family use diamonds... but not a lot of people see them.
I can go on for actual days about YWNLM's world building. I think about this world too much. I-- I just... I love it. It makes me happy.
#I literally have a section dedicated to how magic works#Also the Void. I love exploring the concept of the Void and made a cool thing called the Void Guardians?#Which are just a bunch of people who have void burns due to exposure (and magic use) of the Void?? It's so fucking cool#The void burns usually come from where the magic concentration is the most#So for example if *I* were to use Void Magic. It'd mostly be around my hands#But if it uhh idk. If someone's magic was (for some reason) concetrated around the eyes#Their scleras would be black! Because void burn#I can keep talking abt the concept of the void if i wanted to omg#someone please ask me abt the void in my AU#i'd love to go on a silly rant abt it#crow talks#❛ a seer of secrets ❜#୨⎯ You Were Nothing Like Me ⎯୧#Undertale AU#Undertale#Lego monkie kid#lego monkie kid fanfiction
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Some stuff I've drawn semi recently
#keese draws#oc art#oc#ocs#furry#furry oc#furry art#Ive been going thru it recently but Ill survive#on the bright side the pet sitting job for my aunt is coming up soon#so Ill have a house to myself for a bit at least#Im probably still gonna be fairly offline for the foreseeable future unless I somehow manage to fix my sleep schedule anytime soon#not to say I will be on any sorta complete hiatus or anything just that Im not getting any more active most likely#not that I think anyone rly cares at this point since its been the norm for a while now but yknow#Ill still be around to answer asks and stuff just dont freak out if I take a lil bit to see it 👍#anyways enough of being a downer Im actually pretty happy with these even if theyre mostly just doodles#also I havent posted any art of these guys in a While but say hi to them while you can cause theyre back into the void of my brain now#first is keese (the oc™) second is toon and third is clyve#all from different stories but toon and clyve are both from the magic cat universe#their paths never meet tho the closest connection they have has to go through like 4 characters first#you can also tell theyre from different stories because one is anthro and the other isnt lol#generally speaking I consider anthro designs slightly more canon but both are canon depending on the story#not in a shapeshifting way just in a me being an inconsistent bitch sorta way#but yeah keese the oc is much older than either of those two I just dont talk abt them or their story ever#but hey if any of yall remember suckerz those two are besties#suckerz is sort of younger than the other two and sort of much older than all three#shes a sort of updated version of a reallyyyy old sona sort of character I had in like 6th grade I think#back during my lilo and stitch experiment oc era where I had one that was music themed#I also had a digimon variant of her she was called like beatramon or smth like that#she was basically a hypothetical music mascot and shes kind of still that tbh#if I ever get enough into making music that I start posting shit it will be my music mascot
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i’m tired of having to explain to my friends why i had to make a post basically begging for support while im unable to work because it only makes me more angry every time i do so. like i can’t get short term disability because that’s not a benefit that they offer and even if they did, i would have to pay for that myself in order to get it. i could’ve rolled over my old plan from the previous owner to the new owner and pay for it separately. but the one time i had used it, they put me under illness and not injury (which is what it was. because i injured my foot and couldn’t stand to do my job. i even put it as an injury and they said i lied and changed it) and the payout i got barely covered my bills. i didn’t see a point in continuing to pay for a service that would do that plus it took a full month after i went back to work to even get the payout. the only benefits they offer at 401(k) with them matching, PTO, and health insurance. that’s it. i’m using what’s left of my PTO this week to bulk up my paycheck so i can actually get some kind of money but after that i don’t know when i’ll have a paycheck next. i’m looking for work because i can’t afford not to work. there’s nothing in place to protect the worker at my job in the event of this happening. the only reason im not completely losing my mind is because im still able to get health insurance while im unable to work but that’s not because of them. that’s because of FMLA. if that wasn’t in place, who the fuck knows man
#o posts#i won’t get into how i don’t like the owners son and how he basically said i wasn’t valuable to the company anymore while injured#in a more professional way#or how they offer pto but only if you work a min of 34hrs a week and that’s regardless of ft or pt status#or how they offer health insurance but only to those who work 30+hrs a week#again regardless of ft or pt status#and i especially won’t get into how i had 0 faith in getting any support from anyone when making this post#asking for help#because i’ve literally been homeless and i was told they would keep me in their thoughts and prayers#thoughts and prayers aren’t going to pay my bills linda!#i’ve gotten more support than i thought i would get#i won’t say how many and i won’t say how much#but it’s more than i thought it would be#and that’s also because i fully expected 0 people to help with $0#hell people can’t even share the post i made to try and help me#like my moms the only fucking share that post has#thoughts prayers and good vibes are nice and i appreciate them#but the companies i pay my bills to won’t take them as payment#but ya know#america’s so fucking great!#also i’m sorry i know my blog has been a fucking trainwreck for almost a month now#with me being all over the place emotionally#everything has gone to shit and at least here#if i post something im already expecting to be talking to the void instead of expecting someone to spare a like or comment to it#i love tumblr for that and it’s truly the only place i have currently where i can yell and cry in between therapy
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being forever anxious about literally everything will have you engaging in the most questionable behaviors
#this post is about me walking through the sludge in the dark to break into the lab and sneak a peek at someone else’s thesis from some years#ago#to check the title page to make extra sure i am formatting mine right even though there is already an example on the online submission form#(i say ‘break in’ like i don’t have keycard access)#for a minute i thought i heard my adviser’s voice from around the corner where her office is#contemplated checking if she was there and being like. hey what’s up what are you doing here at this hour (she almost always leaves early)#and also asking her my question which i just emailed her about the other form that’s due tomorrow#but ultimately the appeal of immedaite answers (which. low probability even if she was there tbh) was not worth the risk#of not only having to explain why i was also at the devil’s sacrament (lab at 8pm)#but why i was there wearing only shorts and a tshirt under my cloak when it’s 37°F outside and raining#because i don’t really have a good answer for that#screams into the void#i guess this can also go into the#me writing my thesis#tag. it’s not really about writing but close enough
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gotta love the feature of depression that's like, can't tell if people in my life are actually being annoying or if I'm not handling things well and therefore overreacting to things that would normally not bother me!
#are my friends oversharing without asking and using me as an unpaid therapist#or am I just unable to handle any outside complaints/negativity at this moment no matter how valid#a question I ask myself daily#sometimes it's pretty obvious like I told one of my coworkers today that I was in a car accident this weekend#(it was a fender bender and I am fine)#and her next sentence was about how tired she was etc. until she circled back to asking me about the accident#(you'll notice she has been downgraded from friend to coworker bc she does this shit all. the. fucking. time.)#another friend texted me unprompted about her car issues#and when I responded to commiserate and also told her about the accident#she was surprised that I'd been going fast enough that I was in pain from it#(again I am fine. just sore.)#like in that case I probably shouldn't be pissed that she texted me about her car issues out of the blue#bc we had already talked about it and I do want to be kept up to date on my friends' lives?#this is the story of me at almost 29 realizing that I've let a bunch of my friendships devolve into#me being a receptacle for other people's problems and complaints at all times#and now I don't know how to set boundaries or get myself out of this situation#especially since this is the pattern I've developed with like...most of my friends#it's super cool I don't hate it at all#ask people if they have capacity before you bitch about your life#also if anyone has the lead on a cute cottage in the void where I could just exist and not have to speak to anyone#or have any responsibilities whatsoever#for like a week or two#PLEASE lmk#a bitch needs an actual break
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