#also i think i may have blocked you by accident and if i did i'm sorry rip

[danthropologie]

Ok it might just be me, but I’m actually sick of people especially on twitter saying he has a bald spot, which this time round has migrated to the top of his head??? (Don’t post this if you think it’s true, I don’t know if I could cope tbh)

no i agree!! i think his hair may look a little thin at times, but overall it's really not THAT bad. it's getting to be on the same level as the unemployment jokes for me. like besties....he HAS a fucking job and is getting paid more than any of us for a fraction of the effort 😭

[anisespice]

“ baby steps ” || tokyo rev.

continuation of this post.

pairing: bonten x fem!reader [ mikey, ran, sanzu ]

warnings: mature content ahead. MDI. mature language, crude humor, ANGST w/ comfort (mostly in mikey's), deadbeat!bonten (unintentionally), not proof-read so there may be A LOT of errors :// mikey's is LONG, ran + sanzu's are silly goofy, mikey + sanzu's are a lil unhinged lol and i think that’s it :))

notes: can i just say thank y'all so much for showing "accidents happen" the love that i didn't think it would get, it was made on a whim so i'm so so so happy y'all enjoyed! i tagged as many as i could (or that tumblr would allow) sorry if i missed some of you :( thank you for your patience and let me know how you feel about this continuation format :) !! notes ii: also also, pt. 2 for "accidents happen" coming soon! notes iii: MY COMPUTER CRASHED AND I THOUGHT I LOST EVERYTHING BUT IT'S OKAY IT'S OKAY :'))))

tagged: @fantasycantasy , @illegalspacecow , @captaincyberqueen , @cherryblossiren , @niragiswhore , @awkwardaardvarkforever , @valentsoup , @lovely212 , @miffysoo , @yandere-kouhai , @i-am-just-a-girl-ur-honor , @wisteriarose214 , @kindadolly , @yuwaimo , @sweetbella1221 , @simpingfor-wakasa , @sirachano0dles , @yutahg , @slowlikehonee , @blurpleuni-squid , @haruchiyoreen , @istanstraykidss , @loyard176 , @msluccapotato , @luv444lay , @backgroundcharactera , @jegelskeranime

Ever since you picked up your daughter, there’s been a hovering presence that wouldn’t go away no matter where you went. From the park, to the grocery store, all the way home it clung to you like a bad itch. Despite looking over your shoulder and being met without any sort of threat, that didn’t stop the uneasy feeling. And it only intensified when you received a knock on your front door.

You made a confused hum, checking the time on the microwave to confirm that it was indeed past the reasonable hour for potential visitors. Not to mention, you weren’t expecting anyone.

The hairs on the back of your neck stood up, instincts telling you that something wasn’t right, that your best option was to pretend you weren’t home. However, the person on the other side knew otherwise as they knocked on the door again, this time with more fervor. You inhaled sharply, taking hesitant steps towards the door until you were mere feet away from it. Eventually, you worked up the courage to look through the peephole, your brows furrowing in distress when all you could see was black—They were covering it. All the more reason not to open the door…

What if it’s a robber? Ridiculous, they don’t knock.

What if it’s just the neighbor? Why cover the peephole?

More and more did your mind swirl with endless possibilities, each one becoming less and less believable. Taking a long, deep breath, you doubled-checked the door-chain was on before slowly cracking it open. And as you attempted to peek through the sliver, nothing could’ve prepared you for the arm that forced its way through, startling you as you yelped, stumbling back as it made a grab at you.

Before you had the thought of shoving the door closed on the offender’s arm they grabbed the little chain, then yanked it clean out of the wall. To your terror, a dark hooded figure entered your home, head hung low, concealing their identity.

You began to hyperventilate, backing up to keep distance as they staggered further into your home before kicking the door closed behind them, effectively blocking you from the exit. Surely, someone heard your scream and would check in, or call the police. But, how long did you have before the intruder decided to make a move? Not to mention, your sleeping child just down the hall…

With that last thought in mind, you immediately steeled your nerves.

Even if you had to use your bare hands, you were going to do whatever it took to keep your baby out of harms way.

You reached for the closest weapon without taking your eyes off the figure, hands clasping onto a discarded umbrella that was leaned up against a closet door. It wasn’t ideal, but it would have to do. Taking a defensive stance, you prepared for what you assumed to be the inevitable.

“I-I don’t know who you are, or what you want…b-but if you don’t leave…my..my boyfriend will be home any minute! H-He knows how to fight, and he’ll fuck you up if you try anything!”

Your means of intimation fall on deaf ears. It were as if you hadn’t spoken at all. They just…stood there. Watching you from the darkness. That feeling, that hovering presence you’d been weary about all evening…there was no doubt in your mind it was because of this individual. Suddenly, they gave a watery chuckle, hand coming up to rub the lower half of their face as the chilling noise dissipated into soft snickers.

You sweatdropped. “I mean it! He’ll be here real soon, so you better get out of here before-”

“[_____]…” the figure finally rasped, voice heavy with an emotion you couldn’t decipher in the moment. You froze, eyes widening.

“…How the hell do you know my name?”

Without much urgency, they stepped forward into the light. Beneath the warm glow, it took you mere seconds to recognize the person standing before you. You gasped, trembling hands dropping the umbrella, it landing with a harsh clatter. Soft, mortified hitches in your breath echoed through the small space, memories flashing before your eyes as you covered your gaping mouth.

“M.. Ma..” you whimpered, throat tightening. A shell of a man, who gazed upon you with stormy eyes flooded with tears at the mere sight of you.

He gave another strained laugh, muttering to himself as he soaked you all in. “Needed to know.. Needed to know it was really you…”

Mikey eyed you up, intensely, eerily silent as he did so. Then, he took in the surroundings, the warmth, the interior, the smell of dinner—It truly felt like a home. A bitter pill to swallow once he reminded himself that you built it without him.

His sharp gaze returned to your stunned expression. He sneered.

“Must’ve been easy for you. To forget me and move on, just like that. Like I was nothing.”

You blinked, taken aback. All you could do was remain speechless, cemented to the ground with thoughts and questions racing in your head. Now matter how many times you opened your mouth, no sound would come out aside from choked whimpers.

“Do you know…how long I’d been searching for you? Been mourning for you?” He hissed through clenched teeth. “When you left, I thought… I thought someone had taken you. That I lost you all because I was too stubborn to say I’m sorry…”

As he spoke, Mikey slowly closed the space between you. The more he came into the light, the more you could see how the years had treated him. His cheekbones were more pronounced, the dark circles under his eyes as well. His lips were dry, cracked, his fair skin now ghoulishly pale. If not for the black hoodie you would’ve mistaken him as such; ghost of your past.

Your shoulders shook, hands hovering over your face as you gaped in disbelief. He’d been looking for you?

That night, that stupid fight you could barely remember…he made it crystal clear that he wanted nothing to do with you. He pushed you away. Pushed so hard that you almost believed he really wouldn’t have cared if you dropped dead. You knew he didn’t mean it, knew it was just another dark impulse…but none of that mattered when all your pregnancy tests came back positive just hours prior.

That night, you made the decision for the sake of your daughter. And also, for his sake. At the time, you were certain he wasn’t ready to be a father. He was quick to rage, merciless, losing himself to the darkness you tried to protect him from. If you had stayed, you were certain Mikey would’ve never forgiven himself if he lost control in front of his own flesh and blood, if the child grew to resent him for something he struggled to control.

You thought you were doing him a favor…but it appears to have done the opposite.

“And this whole time…you’ve been here, alive. Playing fucking house with someone else.”

You stiffened. Someone else? Your visible confusion only irritated him further.

He scoffed. “Don’t play dumb. You said it yourself. Too bad he won’t be coming home anytime soon. I’ve already got Sanzu and the Haitanis looking around for the bastard. And when they find him, I’ll make him regret sticking his filthy dick inside you.”

Confusion morphed into realization. You did threaten him with said hypothetical boyfriend…But, that was before you knew it was him!

“Oh, Manjiro…” you whispered. He glared, scorned.

“Don’t you dare pity me. I mean, you got the family you always wanted, right? So who cares who it was with, right? Congratu-fucking-lations.”

You shook your head, exhaling deeply as you held your face in your hands. For years, he thought you dead. Then, when he received word of your appearance, he finds you with child. And not once did he consider that child to be his? It’s like…he couldn’t fathom the thought.

If only he had looked just a little bit closer, he would’ve seen that she had his eyes. How they resembled those pools of ink that used to shine with so much hope back in his youth, so playful and full of love…those same eyes that now gazed upon you with contempt.

It stung.

He thought so low, not only of himself, but of you as well.

Taking a deep breath to reel in your emotions, tears began to well up in your eyes. He assumed they were tears for your doomed lover, further breaking his heart as Mikey clenched his fists to the point of nearly drawing blood. Luckily, even though you struggled to find the right words, someone else happily found them for you.

“Papa..?”

Both of you instantly drew your attention on the toddler standing near the kitchen, one fist clutching her blanket while the other rubbed the sleep from her eye. You glanced at Mikey, and he was stiller than stone. His once dead-stare had morphed into what could only be described as incredulous. Surely, he heard her incorrectly…

With a sniffle, you crouched down to address her, offering a soft grin as you nodded earnestly. “That’s right, sweetheart. Papa’s finally come home.”

The little girl blinked sleepily, taking a second to reboot. But, as soon as the words registered, a bright smile stretched across her face as she excitedly rushed towards Mikey, throwing herself onto his legs and hugging them like a koala as she chirped, “Papa, home!”

Said man hobbled a bit at the force, arms windmilling as he caught himself to keep from falling backwards. He didn’t know what to do with himself, especially when those big, round pools of ink opened and stared right up into his soul. Mikey’s heart nearly stopped. With a hitch in his breath, the gangster did everything he could to hold his composure, looking between you and the child as you both gazed at him with so much warmth…it was suffocating.

Sensing he was overwhelmed, you reached down to scoop up the bubbly bundle, holding her close as you eyed Mikey, apprehensively.

He resembled a cornered animal—Muscles stiff, jaw tight, eyes wild. After a moment, Mikey began to slowly back away into the shadows of your home, conflicted, devastated. It wasn’t until his back hit the door did he eventually fall to his ass, of which caused your child to giggle at how silly he was being. However, all you could do was hold back tears, watching as the reality started to weigh down on a man who just discovered he was a father.

Nervous, you gently explained. “I didn’t leave you because of our spat, Jiro…and I never moved on. I just…thought that I’d be doing more harm than good sticking around when I found out I was pregnant…I didn’t want to add any more stress on your plate, so I…”

Mikey didn’t respond. He sat there, stare vast and unfocused. But, you knew he hung on to every word. So you continued. “I wanted to tell you. But…I wasn’t sure how. At the time, I believed you had stopped caring about me altogether. And to hear you’d been looking for me, I-I’m…I’m so sorry. I’m sorry you harbored all that guilt. I didn’t mean for any of that to happen.”

Your daughter wiggled around in your hold, making small grunts in complaint. Her eyes were trained on his figure huddled in the dark, wanting to be acknowledged, wanting his attention. “Papa!”

Mikey flinched. He focused his gaze on the two you, haloed by the light emitting from the living room. You both were like salvation, reaching down to a broken sinner…How could she want anything to do with him? When he had missed so much already…

To keep from accidentally dropping her, you placed your daughter back on the ground, watching wearily as she wobbled all the way to Mikey, blanket in tow. You weren’t worried about him hurting her, far from it…if anything, he appeared to be the fragile one.

Eventually, she made it to her destination, standing before him with a curious, but eager expression as she rested a hand on his knee. Mikey watched her, took in all of her features, every last detail as he engraved it to memory. She was beautiful, just like her mother. One would think his genes didn’t stand a chance. But the eyes. That was all him. From his mother to his older brother to himself, there was no doubt in his mind that those were Sano eyes.

His lower lip quivered, reaching out hesitantly to caress her cheek. She didn’t cower away, merely babbled as she began patting his knee, allowing his thumb to rub over her chubby cheek. You clasped your hands over your mouth, growing even more emotional at the delicate moment. Mikey looked enamored already, eyes subtly sparkling from what you could see as they interacted.

“I-I told her stories, about you. And I made sure to show her photos, too. Old ones, but still you nonetheless. I wanted her to know who her father truly was. Despite everything else…”

Your daughter cooed, then placed her blanket in Mikey’s lap before climbing into it. Mikey didn’t dare move, rigid as she made herself comfortable. He looked up at you, looking for guidance, for reassurance. Your encouraging smile was enough for him to hesitantly place his hands on her small back for support, carefully adjusting so that she was stable. She laid her head on his chest and stuck her thumb in her mouth, sighing contentedly.

And, for the first time in years, he smiled.

When you hadn’t seen her familiar pigtails bobbing around, or heard any of her excited chatter with the receptionist up front, worry couldn’t even begin to describe what you felt the moment you realize…your daughter wasn’t here.

As soon as the meeting looked like it was wrapping up, you politely excused yourself from the room. Masking your worry wasn't too difficult, but there's no doubt a couple people might've noticed the spring in your step as you exited. One of them being Rindou Haitani. He watched you speed down the hall with mild interest, corner of his mouth ticking up ever so slightly as he thumbed around on his phone beneath the table. Having been updating his older brother during the meeting while he was on his smoke break, he was more than eager to inform him of the storm that was no doubt heading his way.

Little did the younger Haitani know, he was already dealing with one.

"And then, Haruka-kun tries to take Momo-kun's bento box because she had cuter animal shapes, but Momo-kun already said no, and so Haruka-kun pushes Momo-kun, and then tries to take it! But I pushed him and hit him with my fist, like this," she clenched up her tiny fist and held it up to Ran before striking down on his forearm with all her might. It didn't even pitch. "Like that."

The lavender-eyed man merely gazed upon her with mirth. "Did you now?"

"Mmhm! And teacher got so mad, and said that she would tell Ma about me fighting, but she's stupid because Ma didn't pick me up today, and I told Haruka-kun if he snitches, I'll beat 'em up!"

Ran lowly whistled. "Quite the little menace, ain'tcha?"

She pumped her fists. "Yeah!" Then, she paused, holding a finger to her chin in thought. "Wait...what's a menace?"

"Ah, something you inherited from your old man." He ruffled her hair, much to her displeasure. Though her innocent jab earlier regarding his age still hit a sore spot, he was starting to like the sound of it. She, on the other hand, wasn't convinced.

"I already told you; Ma was on her happy juice when she said that. She said not to believe anything she says when she's on happy juice. It makes her do silly things."

Ran chuckled. He knew that all too well. The little girl wouldn't be in this world if not for your inability to hold your liquor. But judging based on how you've raised her so far, clearly you made the right decision keeping him in the dark.

He'll admit, he wasn't the best in terms of commitment. Throughout his day to day, Ran just didn't have the energy. With being in Bonten, keeping an eye out for his younger brother, handling business, dealing with numbskulls and disposing of their bodies, there was never a time to even consider settling down. One-night stands and on and off flings were the easiest choice. At least, until he stumbled upon you.

You were the whole package and more. Classy, independent, witty, and a looker to top it all off. When Bonten started collaborating with the organization you worked in, he couldn't help but to be drawn to you—Like a moth to a flame. It started out as the occasional bantering, trying to one-up the other, catch them off guard. Ran was smooth with his words but could never quite beat your sharp tongue. Thus, things escalated to something more flirtatious. Harmless, but it didn't take long before the months of tension between the both of you began boiling over...and throwing alcohol into the mix, it was the first time Ran finally felt like he had the upper hand. Seeing how poorly you handled just a few glasses of wine, it endeared him. Seeing a piece of you that no one else had the privilege to witness. Your sloppy side, the clumsy, whiny, touchy side. After that long, passionate night beneath the sheets, the one time you and Ran allowed yourselves the space to be vulnerable with one another...you found yourself pregnant. And Ran found himself being nonethewiser.

He wonders, if he hadn't left the next morning and completely ghosted you...would you have kept him in the picture?

Suddenly, his phone dings. Reaching back to pull it from his back pocket, Ran half expected it to just be another update on the meeting or Rindou cursing at him to hurry his ass back inside. But, it wasn't that at all. And at the sound of your kitten heels rushing out of the building and halting at the top of the steps, Ran didn't even need to look up to know who was glowering down from them.

"Hey, Ma! Guess what, the purple man isn't such a meanie after all!"

Ran snorted, finally looking up from his phone to greet the woman who not only still had his heart, but evidently his first child. You, on the other hand, weren't so thrilled to see him.

"Rika. Wait inside. Ma's got some words for the purple man."

He smirked. "Wanna say 'em over a glass of wine?"

"You son of a-!"

"Bad word!" Your daughter covered her ears. You flushed, your composure nearly slipping just by being in his prescence. Ran, immediately seeing the opportunity, teasingly pouts at you whilst covering her tiny hands with his larger ones, shielding her.

"Honey, please, not in front of the child. Can't have her repeating those dirty words at school, can we?"

You fumed, speaking through clenched teeth. "Haitani, as soon as I get her in this building, away from you, I swear to God, I'm gonna wring your neck."

He hummed, amused. "Well. Guess she didn't get her violent side from me after all. Speaking of which, did you know at school today-"

"Hey! No snitching!"

“...What did you say?” 

You were hoping you heard the teacher wrong. Surely it was just your exhaustion taking the wheel. But, when her kind smile didn’t falter, nor did her gushes for the supposed “adorable display”, you immediately grew suspicious.

While heading home from work, you went to pick up your children from daycare. And when you arrived, the teacher merely informed you that it was already taken care of by your very handsome and very devoted husband. 

“I-I think you’re mistaken. My boyfriend and I aren’t married…”

The teacher, finally coming back down to earth, tilted her head in confusion. “Eh? You aren’t?” 

“Did he…say we were?” 

“Well, no. I just assumed since it was easy to tell who he was here for. Hikaru and Kaoru look so much like their daddy.”

You choked on your spit.  Hikaru and Kaoru look so much like their daddy. Hikaru and Kaoru look so much like their daddy.

You did everything in your power to keep from strangling the poor woman. Sure, she didn’t do anything wrong per say…but she sure did make a grave error. And your struggle to restrain your intrusive thoughts must’ve shown on your face from the way she placed a concerned hand on your arm. “Are you alright, miss? You look like you’re about to faint.”

“M-Mhm, yep, great, just peachy.” You squeaked through clenched teeth, sweatdrop on your forehead. “Could you um…confirm something for me?”

“Uh.? Er, sure. I’ll try my best.”

With tense shoulders and a tight smile, you asked, “Their…father…did his mouth have two scars in the corners?”

The teacher blinked, confused. Shouldn’t you already know that answer yourself?, she was probably thinking. And she would be right; you did know. But her simple, hesitant nod was the final nail in the coffin that was your delusion—Haruchiyo Sanzu had found you. And to make matters worse, he had the children.

Your smile faltered, twitching ever so slightly. Covering it with a forced chuckle, you cried, “Oh, that’s..wonderful! He’s always been self conscious about them, and I’m j-just.. beaming with joy that he’s embracing them more. Have a nice evening, Ms. Yuki.”

The teacher didn’t get a chance to respond as you quickly turned on your heel and began speed walking home. You’d apologize for your abrupt exit another day…right now there were more important matters to worry about. For instance—How on earth did Sanzu find you? How did he know about the twins and where they were? Oh, God…did he know about Satoru?

Dialing him up a few times only for the calls to go straight to voicemail weren’t reassuring in the slightest, having you rush across oncoming traffic just so you could avoid any further delays for your fraying nerves. You could see your apartment complex up ahead, heart thumping in your throat at the familiar, black SUV parked a couple blocks down. Had it not been for the heavily tinted windows and no license plates, you probably would’ve overlooked it. He knew where you lived. Stomach in knots, muscles stiff, nerves shot. You didn’t know whether to feel relieved or devastated. Your kids were safe at home, but at what cost? You stood in front of the building, rooted to the ground. Despite mentally preparing for this exact scenario for years, it all went down the drain the second you went to that daycare and discovered your children were missing.

It wasn’t until your phone vibrated did you snap out of your thoughts, shakily pulling the device out of your back pocket to check the notification.

from : unknown 1:06 pm     “ hi, mama.~ ”

Your stomach twisted. Attached to the message were two photos.

The first photo was of your kids eating McDonald's in the kitchen, happily cheesing and waving at the camera. You couldn't hold your choked gasp, hand coming up to hold your quivering lower lip—They were safe.

The second photo...was of Satoru. Tied to a chair, gagged, and beaten senseless. And standing behind him, holding him by his hair so that he could pose for the camera, grinning like a cheshire cat...

Another message pops up. Your grip tightened around your phone.

from : unknown 1:09 pm " daddy's home.~ "

© 2024-2025 anisespice ッ all rights reserved. likes, comments & reblogs much appreciated!

[momentomori24]

Keiji is a character that I'm pretty sure every one of us can recognize is an absolute weirdo (ok maybe some are too hard on copium for the "weirdo" part) and sketchy as hell, but thinking about everything he's done it really feels like he's so much shady and ruthless than we give him credit for. So here's me bulletpointing some the moments that I haven't seen too many talk about, a little theory throwing his status into question and addressing the massive elephant in the room that almost everyone refuses to acknowledge. If there's something else you feel I missed or wanted to evaluate on, do leave it in the comments.

[Also, disclaimer: I will be discussing Keiji and Sara in a romantic light near the end of this post, so if that makes you uncomfortable please proceed with caution or skip entirely. This should go without saying but for my own sake I will say it anyway-- No, I do not condone their relationship in real life. No, this is not meant to be "shippy" or endorsement of any kind. This will simply be pointing out their dynamic as another example to prove the whole point of this rant. But if someone else does ship them that's totally fine. Fiction doesn't equal reality and if you harass a real person over fictional characters you will not see the light of heaven. Be civil, please and thank you. My block button is rated E for Everyone and if anyone decides to ignore the warnings and be an asshole I won't hesitate to use it. Thanks for listening. Disclaimer over.]

*Being a murderer.

I feel like I should start with the most obvious and undeniable. I don't think this is debatable to anyone here. Mr. Policeman may have been an accident and kinda confirmed by Midori to have been set up, but he still shot and killed an unarmed man in a moment of panic and recklessness. Even putting that aside, there's no denying that he killed Megumi in cold blood to get out of his debt to her and covered it up to the group to preserve his credibility. Regardless of what you think of Megumi, he has no excuse here. Not only is he one more kill away from being a serial killer, he's the only participant in our group that has actually killed people directly aside from Alice. Another reason why I bring this up is cuz something that completely flew over my head is this:

At the start of the game he had the audacity to complain about not having a partner or someone he knows with him like Sara does as if he didn't literally let Megumi get ripped apart by chains probably not even an hour ago Keiji what the hell--

*Throwing Kanna under the bus repeatedly.

Despite positioning himself as a protector and someone to rely on, he's far from above putting their youngest members in danger. Next to voting for the fourteen year old girl to die, he had the great idea of letting said fourteen year old be the one to babysit their biggest liability. Up to the point where they would stay in the same room both day and night. While I absolutely 100% trust that Sou would never EVER do anything to her, Keiji had no guarantee of that when he send her off. Hell, he literally just got done accusing Sou of setting Joe up to die (which I don't believe almost solely based on the fact that he said it, more on that another time maybe). He knew Sou was bad news, and openly acknowledges how adults can be terrifying, but he did it anyway. The dubiety of throwing the already traumatised little girl to keep watch on what they thought to be the most dangerous adult that had manipulated her once before is not lost on me, and that he didn't take any responsibility for her afterwards isn't lost on me either. To be fair, the Sou and Kanna thing doesn't just fall on him, it falls on everybody (Alice gets a pass because he actually swapped out with Kanna to watch Sou for her), but he was the one with the final say on the matter and who encouraged her to take the role despite Reko's rightful protests. The fact that he also voted for her to die in the Main Game, and is the only adult to do so, doesn’t help his case.

*Attempting to frame Sou knowing Reko was actually responsible.

While you could argue he was trying to cover for her since he knew why she did what she did, trying to pin this act on Sou to cast more doubt on his is extremely shitty. Never mind the blatant corruption and the irony of a supposed man of the law abusing his power to knowingly frame an innocent person (in this situation at least), and him sowing more seeds of confusion and resentment within an already rattled group, and giving Sou legitimate reason to be suspicious of him (and by extension Sara)-- this makes it so difficult to trust him after realising he's done this. Literally every time he accuses someone of being or doing something suspicious (mostly Sou), I always have to think in the back of my head if he’s telling the truth or just telling a blatant lie. He's shown that he's willing to not only lie to cover for himself, but to lie to delegitimize someone else. And Sara never caught onto it (Sou and maybe even Nao likely did tho). She never openly acknowledged it-- No one did. The complete lack of mention of what he did here makes this action quite missable. Hell, I didn't even catch it the first time. Has he done this before? Who else has he lied about? Who else would he lie about? Who else would he knowingly pit against the group? You don't have to wait for that answer, because I will provide an example later. And with "later", I mean now.

*Casting suspicion on Gin before the vote while hiding the fact that he killed Megumi.

While it's not as blatant as with Kanna, there are two instances where Keiji shows a readiness to either put or leave Gin in harm's way. The biggest one for me is in the Main Game. Like, how dare you. That is a furry child, sir. This kid’s like TWELVE. Even though he makes a valid point about calling out suspicious actions to clear them up so we can all trust each other, casting doubt on Gin of all people right there feels pretty screwed to me. This was before the preliminary vote. His words could’ve very well gotten Gin voted for if he couldn’t disclose why he did what he did for whatever reason and therefore being unable to clear himself from suspicion. It’s even more fucked when you realise that Keiji has literally murdered his partner and is currently planning to get Sou killed while giving this whole spiel about doubting others so that we can believe them and pointing the finger at a little kid to make an example to the group. But when Nao, Sou and Sara call him out on his suspicious actions that could rightfully damage his credibility, he tries to shut them down completely. My brother in Christ, you brought it on FIRST (don’t get me wrong I’m very much aware he didn’t really mean the whole “trusting each other” bit but come on dude)--

Speaking about not meaning what he says:

*Letting the group think he’s Ok to vote for knowing he’s the Keymaster.

This kinda got to me because I thought this was Keiji actually being… vulnerable? Accepting the consequences of his actions and allowing them to vote for him in their distrust without protest even tho it could cost him his life, maybe. Correct me if I’m wrong, but I can’t remember a lot of times-- or any times, really-- where Keiji has willing put himself into the line of fire, at this point at least. He always finds a way to keep himself safe, give himself insurance, and I thought that this would be the one time he doesn’t do that. But this feels so ominous looking back knowing that he was the Keymaster the whole time. That our distrust and betrayal and his resignation to it all didn’t matter because he was going to be safe no matter what. That he knowingly allowed us to assume that he was a safe vote because he didn’t want his plan to kill Sou to be ruined, which narrowed down choice of people we can safely vote for even further. That this action is ultimately the reason why Sou and Kanna were our only options to kill off in the end. If he had admitted it there, we could’ve found someone else to vote for so our final options could consist of three people, not two. But he didn’t, and the rest is history. There’s a lot of things he’s done I can’t get over. This one ranks pretty high. The second Main Game is already a huge sore spot for me for obvious reasons; knowing that a lot of the things that happened were due to his inaction where it truly mattered and activity in all the wrong places doesn’t make me fee any better. He didn't say he was a safe vote-- he didn't lie-- but his words carefully omit that voting for him means a total party death, something he should've stated then (and before this, really).

*Leaving Sara with the sacrifice card.

Despite making a big show about “always being by her side” and being her “reliable policeman”, he chose to look away when she was in real danger. He attached himself to her as her right hand man, made her shoulder the responsibility of being the leader, constantly manipulated and flattered her to win her trust and gain her favour-- but when she needed him the most, he basically left her for dead because it was the most beneficial to him. Keep in mind that not only did he know about her getting the sacrifice (he was also the sage so he'd have seen the trade happen), but he had the tokens to help her get rid of it. But those tokens weren’t for her life. They were for his. He used them instead to give himself the Keymaster as insurance for the Main Game (the Keymaster he stole from Sou/Kanna most likely to buy Sara’s trust btw). His desperation for survival outweighed his sense of obligation to keep her safe, and that’s the most subtle yet transparent he’s been about his selfishness. What makes this so much worse is that Keiji is our support character. He’s an ally, and our closest one at that, to the point where Sara burned her hands in a futile attempt to rescue him and signed her life away to save his. And yet his loyalty and protectiveness pale in comparison to other characters. Compare his actions to Sou’s: one of their many parallels and similarities is that both their girls get hit with the sacrifice card. As we’ve established, Keiji was fully aware of Sara being send the sacrifice by Sou, had 50 tokens ready to go and chose to secure his own survival than save her life. Kanna ended up doing it instead, attempting to trade the card off Sara with Sou realising what happened immediately. And what does Sou do? Completely bend over backwards trying to keep her alive. He lied about being the Sacrifice so the others wouldn’t suspect Kanna of having that role, meaning he could try gathering vote for her without anyone seeing his true intentions. He tried to stop her about coming out with the truth of what she had done so she doesn’t sentence herself to death. After everything he did to survive-- after how much he lied, how much he schemed, how much he hurt, and how he had thrown himself away to replace everything that made him Shin with the man that had traumatised him years before the game began to scrape together even the tiniest chance to survive-- he threw it all to the wind and was willing to let it all be in vain if it meant she got to make it out of the Main Game alive. The worst part is that Sou had never intended to make it through that Main Game. He confessed to already knowing that Kanna would choose Sara over him if she truly had the Sacrifice card. Yet he still did what he did all in the hopes that she could win. Because it was all about her survival first, not about them surviving together.

It also gives a different context to Sou's panic and him stumbling over his words trying to come up with any argument to get them to stop. At first I thought that Sou was afraid for his life. Which would make sense-- Keiji and Q-taro set him up to die and seemed pretty adamant on having everyone voting for him to get it all over with. But he was already prepared to die the minute he realised Kanna traded with Sara. So it means it wasn’t his life he was fearing for here-- it was hers. To him, if they voted for him there, it wouldn’t have just been his end but hers too. But we know that Kanna isn’t the one who has the sacrifice. It’s Nao, and considering how the Main Game can end either or both of them dead, I wonder if he regrets not having given up there, not letting Keiji get away with that shitty stunt he pulled knowing it would’ve at least guaranteed her safety than leave her fate in hands of a girl with enough reason to kill her. Ignoring the sounds of my heart shattering into pieces for the 100th time thinking about the Greenblings, it’s so fascinating that our biggest rival and most distrusted member has a greater sense of loyalty and responsibility for his ally than Keiji has for his own. Sou can be a liar and manipulative and selfish, but for how unpredictable he is something I can always trust is his love for those he holds dear (Kanna) and general desire to protect our most vulnerable (Gin). Sou loves Kanna, and so he’s fine with protecting her even if it comes at a price he never wanted to pay. Keiji surely cares about Sara, but unfortunately that is something I can’t say about him-- at least at that time (also the fact that Sou ended up taking more care and responsibility for Kanna despite Keiji having been the one to throw her on him in the first is so ironic).

*Continuously pushing Sara to take on the role of leader.

I think one of Keiji's biggest failures in the game come from his treatment of Sara despite positioning himself as her most reliable ally and her partner. From the very get-go, he was very adamant of making Sara be the one to shoulder the responsibility of the group. He, along with Joe (he didn't do anything wrong here), pushed Sara to be the Challenger during the Russian Roulette, despite Q-taro and Kai being readily available. He made Sara be the one to interrogate the suspicious convict while distancing himself from the situation. And he encourages her to lead them through the Main Game, lets her make the choices that steer them all forward and as a consequence take the fall for them as well. Rather than take on the role himself, or let another adult take it, he places his full trust in her and makes her shoulder everyone's weight so he doesn't have to. And he can see the effect it has on her: having horrific hallucinations due to the immense guilt she feels. But having Sara as their leader gives him a greater shot at survival and helps his credibility, so even though he tries to provide her comfort he still continues to keep her in that role. Again, the high schooler taking responsibility for the adults falls on a lot of the older people here, but Keiji was the one who kickstarted it rather than just go along with it like everyone else had. Gin, Nao, Kanna, Reko and even fucking Sou to an extent all have moments where they take the burden off her and relieve her of that pain she shoulders all the time (or at least try to). I need Keiji to take more responsibility for both the group and for her.

*Pitting Sara and Joe against each other.

This is just another example of the previous point. This isn't as bad, and I could give him the benefit of the doubt that this might have not been intentional, but it's something I want to bring up regardless. I'll be the first to say that Keiji wasn't wrong here. Prying into everyone's votes is a very bad move, especially since no one knew that Mishima would actually die (it was introduced as a practice round, after all). I agree with him, Joe was being rash, but instead of leaving the conversation there, he decided to throw Sara into it to pick a side. Which is... not good. He already won the argument and already had Reko on his side. Bringing in Sara could not only make Joe feel worse and potentially strain their relationship (especially if she rightfully chooses Keiji's side like he was expecting and hoping for), but just puts Sara in the spotlight during something she doesn't want to be part of. While there's a chance he might've done this because he know Joe is more likely to listen to her than him, he should've known better than that. It again makes her take the responsibility of giving the final verdict that would've otherwise gone to him.

*Asking Sara to take responsibility for his life

I've got nothing other that the grown adult swearing his life to the grieving, unstable teenager to take responsibility for while asking her if she'd die along with him is weird as heck. Keiji's said weirder things prior to this, but this one is a different weird. I think Beanieman's post mostly echoes my thoughts on this on, so I'll link it here for this point. This part kinda bothers me:

He shouldn't be encouraging her taking on anymore responsibility than she already is. He knows that the deaths that happened under her leadership haunt her. He knows that she's very much unstable enough already, to the point where he takes baby-steps to avoid triggering her trauma over Joe. He positioned himself as her reliable partner, her rock to lean on (quite literally sometimes). We see first hand how emotionally dependent she is on him. If he died, it would destroy her-- she'd destroy herself over it. He knows this (or should) but he still does it. His disappointment and dismissiveness when she understandably rejects him makes it worse. The guilt of potentially not living up to his expectations is not what she needs.

*Potentially working for Asunaro

This is more ambiguous than everything else here and more a theory than anything but it's been on my mind for a long time that Ranmaru might actually be onto something here. We know that Asunaro has a strong hold on the police. Midori was able to infiltrate the force, and they were able to get rid of Mr. Policeman for looking into the corruption going on, first having Megumi fire him and secondly getting Keiji to kill him by planting false info about the suspect having a gun. Megumi was also able to get Keiji off the hook for murder, which I believe Asunaro had a hand in too (I theorize this might've been her wish). There's also Alice, who was arrested and sent to prison despite the fact that he (legally) didn't kill anyone since Midori was a doll. The police are connected to Asunaro-- by extension Megumi and extending further potentially Keiji.

Something I've seen someone rightfully point out is that neither of the options you're given to say in response to the accusation... actually deny it? Both choices dance around answering directly, which is suspect as fuck. If Keiji truly wasn't with Asunaro, why not shut that theory down immediately? There's no benefit to answering anything but "no" when he's innocent, and he's lied straight to people's faces for less. So why not just debunk it? I think it's cuz there might be some truth to what Ranmaru was saying here. The biggest reason I think this is because despite the fact that Keiji quit the force, he and Megumi were still associating with each other years later. They were kidnapped together and partnered up for their first trial. One missable piece of dialogue is Keiji admitting that he was with his partner-- or rather a "coworker"-- before getting knocked out.

That slip of the tongue and backtracking makes me believe this part to be true. Him switching from "my partner" to "a coworker", which is a lot more distant and impersonal, makes me think it's got to be Megumi. However, I don't believe that Keiji would wanna keep in touch with her after what happened willingly, so I can only imagine that it's due to that debt he has to her. My little game theory here is that after the shooting, the debt he owed her was a forced recruitment into Asunaro. It's the only thing I can imagine he meant by "the worst kind of debt", a debt he'd literally let her die for to get out of. And if this is true, then it could also explain away his instant attachment to Sara, since he'd know beforehand that she's someone he can depend on due to her having the highest chance at survival. Maybe he already knew about her beforehand, one way or the other. We know Hayasaka did (which I think we as a fandom moved on from way too fast btw). Kai and Sou did too. There's always a chance. And unlike Sou's victory rate and Midori's favourite number, it's not zero. One person made a comic about this idea I recommend checking it out, it's tastefully unsettling. But still very much unsetling and uncomfortale. Be warned that it's also Keisara-centred, so if that makes you even more uncomfortable they did the job right you can ignore it. Proceed with caution or don't read if you don't like.

*Being a predator

I have been waiting so long for this one XD For context: a while ago I made a longpost discussing the sanitisation of soushin and this kind of toxic attitudes in fandoms regarding "problematic content" (ships, characters, shows, you name it). In it, I mentioned that it's not only soushin that receives this treatment but a certain other dynamic too. It's not a rainy day, however this has been way overdue and if I don't get this done now I never will.

Something I've seen a lot, and I mean a LOT-LOT is this notion that Keiji acts "like a father" to Sara and that their relationship is a completely platonic father-daughter bond and that he's the resident dad of the group? Like, it's cute, but that's not at all what their relationship is. At all. Not even a little bit. We called Sou and Kanna siblings before the Greenblings reveal. The difference is that not only does half the fandom think this man is gay, but he's only ever been protective and caring and loving without any romantic intentions towards Kanna ever. His title as her brother was deserved, based on the genuine affection and platonic protectiveness similar to that of Alice's. Keiji has made advances tho, on many occasions, and his flirting is repeatedly acknowledged by other characters. Namely Sou and Reko.

(Sou grills him for being a creep every chance he gets I love him XD) But yeah, these are not the type of reactions and comments you receive when being a "father-figure" to the teenager. You get all this when you hit on the teenager. Which he does all the time by calling her "cute" every time she asks something and his "cute little detective", swearing himself to her by saying that "he's always on her side" or something like that, asking her if she'd die alongside him, repeatedly claiming or insinuating that they're on a date, or ""having a moment"" and going to ""take the next step"" when in private (*cough* groomer *cough*)-- you name it, he likely said it. He's a walking-talking ladykiller machine and teenage girls aren't safe, apparently.

(Quick note: The dialogue for the Russian Roulette one is a tad different now. In the new translation he says "cause you're so darn cute" now. I dunno if that makes it sound any less weird, but I felt like putting that out there. What I'm also putting out there is that according to the trivia he calls her cute 8 times throughout the game so. Yeah. *Cough* groomer *COUGH COUGH*)

Like, who tf says this?? Especially that last part 💀 Even if you wanna die on the hill that these are supposed to be "jokes" not to be taken seriously, we should all be able to agree that the (ex)police officer in his late 20s jokingly hitting on the high schooler he follows around is still weirdo behaviour at best and down right despicable at worst. The fandom seeing lowkey predatory/inappropriate behaviour from a figure of authority persistent for almost three entire chapters and dismissing it as "fatherly" and "platonic" is, well, concerning. It's very concerning. If your dad acts like Keiji, you should probably call the police. Unfortunately for Sara, Keiji is the police. And considering this guy got away with manslaughter, I don't think said police would do anything anywho. But yeah-- he uses flattery and flirting to distract her from prodding to much at him while simultaneously aiming to gain favour in her eyes. He showers her with reassurance of his loyalty and affirmation of his deeper attachment towards her and her alone every chance he gets to cement his position as her closest and most trustworthy ally. He insinuates a romantic partnership between them to others to mostly keep her to himself or the two of them alone (he always does that when they're investigating or going to investigate by themselves). There's such an obvious romantic undertone to their relationship and his actions that it going almost completely ignored in the fandom feels weird to me.

I want to make clear that there's nothing wrong with headcanoning Keiji as a father figure to Sara. It's cute. Keiji didn't have a dad himself, and the closest thing to a father figure he had was the man he shot dead. He's a damaged and hardened guy. But Sara's dad is involved with Asunaro and Gin's is an alcoholic, and in a situation where they both need guidence and protection he tries his best to grow and change, fumbling to become that decent father none of them got to have. It's nice, and a wholesome dynamic for our "characters with memorandum counterparts and only non-determined deaths" trio. But that's obviously not what their dynamic is. There's a difference between headcanoning something and erasing canon and the Yttd fandom leans heavily into the latter. Keiji's a creep, he always has been, yet 90% of people I see always portray him as a Mr. Dad Guy or completely sanitise him to hell when him being creepy and unnerving to be around is what made him such a fascinating character. Just like I said with Soushin, the sanitisation to make canon more digestible is one thing: harassing or insulting the people that explore canon is another. I'm gonna take a bullet, derail this rant and say it-- Keisara shippers get so much shit for literally being right it's so infuriating. Keiji does hit on Sara, a lot. He's creepy and weird like that. Him flirting with her isn't a "mistranslation" or a joke or anything like that; his dubious wording and antics are very much intentional. Yet the only people I see actually addressing and acknowledging that without adding fluff is keisara shippers and other ""proshippers"" only for them to get fucking sniped for it I cannot 💀💀 I have yet to meet a single eastern fan who calls this cop "fatherly". This really feels like such a western issue cuz the majority of the japanese fandom agrees that this man's a predator (correct me if i'm wrong but keisara is the most popular ship in the japanese side of the fandom, right?). Then again, eastern fandoms are more chill over there when it comes to separating fiction and reality in general anywho.

*Yeah, I think I'm done with the Keiji slander. Yay. Time to unceremoniously end this.

There's more to say about that, but this is a Keiji post, not another shipping discourse post (although it's hard discussing Keiji's predatory behaviour without bringing it up too). Before I do spiral from the original point, I'm going to try and reach some sort of conclusion here. While I did spent the majority of this post just reading Keiji to filth, and am very salty towards him in particular, this was not just to rake him through mud for my own sanity (tho it's part of it XD). Keiji's character is that he started off as someone who wanted to do the right thing, someone who wanted to be good and moral and protect others by joining the force only to kill all the progress he made along with the person who inspired him to become an officer in the first place. It heavily contrasts the Keiji we have now, a sleazy, unreliable and corrupt ex detective who flirts with underage girls and is willing to resort to the most bankrupt of decisions to save himself. A man that has long lost hope of his wounds healing that he lets them fester and his rot spread onto others. And while I headcanon Keiji to just inherently be a piece of shit, his former self tried his best to be genuinely good before he became so convinced he can never be better that he made peace with his shittiness in the end.

With all this I wanted to highlight some the shadier and bankrupt things he's done that I haven't seen much discussion around and refresh myself on them before the final part. Both so no matter how emotionally dependent and therefore rose-tinted Sara is about the man I don't forget what he's actually like and what he's done while also being able to appreciate how much he's changed for the better. Some of my favourite examples about how he's changed are these:

Before the second Main Game Keiji was willing to let Sara and Kanna die because it was the most beneficial option for him, but in Chapter 3 he takes the on the role of "it" from Kanna and refuses to tag Sara when he thought he was gonna die after failing to beat Midori.

Actually showing more sympathy towards Sou after the Main Game. He was very mean about dismantling his pretence of a cold front to Kanna's death, don't get me wrong, but he showed a lot more consideration and understanding for Sou's feelings and acknowledgement about his active role in it than he ever had beforehand.

He was genuinely fighting for everyone to survive the game, not just himself. While Keiji would prefer everyone making it out safely, he has a tendency to guarantee his own survival first through any means necessary. His plan to corner Midori in the banquet could've cost him his life if it weren't for Q-taro's final stunt, yet he still reassured Sara to save Gin even tho it could've resulted in his execution from Meister potentially finding him guilty of violating the rules.

Him hugging Mai and trying to be more cheerful was cute as heck. I'm sorry but him showing more vulnerability around his allies and being less closed off in a way he hasn't been before is something I'm very head empty about. That he was hugging and interacting with Mai without making any unwanted advances or ladykiller jokes and generally just having a more friendly vibe was nice. It makes his creeping on Sara more unfortunate, but I'll take what I can for now. The bar is in hell.

And that's it, I think. Overall, I hope they do address some of his actions here in the final part or make them have an impact on his and Sara's relationship. Especially that Asunaro part. The person who wished for Sara to join the death game is still unknown and so is Keiji's consent form wish (same goes for the Dummies, Hinako and Megumi), so I'm curious if they're related or not. If he's going to go down an even darker path or redeem himself as much as he can we'll see when the final part drops. He has the potential to go both ways. This is going to be kinda awkward if the next part reveals him to have been a decent guy all along, so hopefully that doesn't happen. Please be morally bankrupt, man. This post didn't end up the way I wanted it to, nor bring up as many points as I would've liked, but I know I won't finish it if I went full perfectionist on it (I already spent months on this writer's block do be a bitch) and it's looking kinda long already. Hopefully it's still decent enough as is right now. I'd like to say that this is my apology for the last longpost I made, but I brought up one of the most controversial and hated ships and traits of Keiji's character and defended them, so maybe I shouldn't 🙃 Anywho, hope you enjoyed and cheerio.

[stormblessed95]

Hi! do you know where the line "You are me, I am you" came from? was it first mentioned in Serendipity? or were the guys mentioning it already and RM included in the song? thanks!

I could take this to a very in depth and deep place, but I'll try to keep it more contained. I'm still on vacation technically, but can't sleep amd im just enjoying streaming SMFpt2 so I'm trying to catch up on all I've ignored over here on tumblr. Sorry to keep you waiting for so long anon!

Basically, did RM make up the phrase "i am you, you are me" (or vice versa) and the first time we ever heard the phrase was in Serendipity? No. Lol it in fact has orgins in kpop previous to Serendipity in the song by Zico, "I am You, You are Me."

English lyrics here (just a lyric video)

"I am You. You are Me" is also actually an ancient Mayan phrase, Essentially meaning "I am another yourself." It's basically used to describe being so similar to another person, it brings your connection closer and their is an ease of interaction and closeness there. For Mayans it was used as a way of honoring each other, as a statement of unity and oneness. It is not necessarily romantic in nature as a phrase. But both Zico and Jimin made it a very romantic connotation in their songs.

Anyway, back to Zico... he released this song in January of 2016. And "I am you, you are me" is literally the title. Lol so Serendipity does not have first claim to the phrase in kpop at all either. We also know that BTS has been on friendly terms with Block B (Zicos group) and that they worked together for MAMA back in 2014 too.

During his MV, Zico basically matches by accident with this girl over and over again and says they are therefore destiny. One of the ways they match is through both ending up wearing bandaids on their fingers, the same finger.

A few months later, at a fansign on 160402, Jikook were sitting next to each other and fans noticed they were wearing matching bandaids on the same hand. When a fan first noticed it on Jimin and asked about it, he said JK gave it to him. When a fan asked JK about it, he said he wasn't hurt and was just wearing it just because. Lol, it's a mystery. Why did JK decide to give a matching bandaid to Jimin? Why did Jimin just go along with it? (I know this one actually because his precious maknae gave him something, and Jimin has been whipped from the get-go. Lol) is it related to the MV and their first moment of acknowledging (or at least JKs first moment, I would fully believe Jimin just wore it because JK gave it to him, no questions asked lmfao) you are me, I am you? Who knows. Or maybe it was just coincidence of timing and still JK being flirty in his own goofball odd way that no one but himself probably understood. Lol but regardless, there is that connection there. Maybe intentional, maybe not. We will never know.

Neither were hurt. So just a random little matching moment with cutesy bandaids courtesy of Jungkook. Just because. 😂 (also catch them in that black and white fit. For them to later on in the years get dubbed the black and white couple as a nickname lol).

ANYWAYS back to Serendipity, after it released and became the icon queen she is. Jikook fully adopted that song as their own and the first moment of them verbally going "I am you. You are me" happened in a run bts episode....

And has since therefore continued consistently over the years with them. They sing it from Serendipity to each other too, not just saying the phrase. That is THEIR SONG. Which is an inherently romantic song, and therefore gives the phrase that romantic connotation in the way that they are using it. In my opinion.

So were jikook using it before Serendipity, depends on what you think of the whole bandaid incident. Lol but not really. Were the rest of BTS saying it pre-Serendipity? Not really that we know of either. And while they may say it now, they say it differently then jikook do, who have made it a whole little thing with finger touches that they do silently to basically say it no verbally to each other or they sing the lyric to each other. Either way, making it fairly romantic lol but only after Serendipity was released. 🤷🏻‍♀️

So, your own thoughts will have to be formed about all of that and if there is any connection there on your own. Lol hope that helps though!

[nightingalesandnorco]

So say I’m writing a one shot series (think whumptober prompts but related) of whumpy incidents where a character keeps getting injured in different ways. Because of these incidents, they have repetitive damage to their chest/ribs/lungs over the course of a decade or so (they end up in a lot of motor vehicle-related accidents for plot reasons).

how:

1- do I keep things different enough for the audience to keep things exciting, injury-wise

2- does getting hurt/healing in this place over and over again impact their medical health as time goes on?

I'm really not sure about this one. Maybe complications? After chest trauma, you might see things like pneumonia, pneumothorax/hemothorax (air or blood in the sac that surrounds the lung that compresses the lung and restricts ventilation), cardiac tamponade (like a hemothorax but in the lining of the heart), sepsis (systemic infection characterized by bacterial infestation of the blood that can lead to rapid decompensation), mediastinitis (inflammation of the space in the chest that contains the heart, great vessels, trachea, bronchi, esophagus, phrenic nerve, vagus nerves, and thoracic duct), atelectasis (state in which a lung no long inflates), fistulas (openings between hollow body structures that don't normally connect [example: a hole between the trachea and esophagus]), thromboembolic events (blood clots that usually form in the legs or pelvis and can travel to other parts of the body [examples: deep vein thrombosis, pulmonary embolism]), disseminated intravascular coagulation (a condition in which the platelets form clots that block small vessels, depleting the body's platelet supply and causing increased bleeding), gastric or duodenal ulcers (erosions of the inner lining of the stomach or topmost portion of the small intestine that often develop after severe trauma), and cardiac dysrhythmias or heart block (irregular patterns or electrical activity in the heartbeat that can lead to a variety of issues if left untreated).

This one is tough, and I'll answer it with the unofficial motto of nursing: it depends. How fast was the car going when the accident occurred? Was the chest trauma blunt or penetrating? Did the patient sustain other injuries (e.g., head injuries, spinal injuries, abdominal injuries)? How old is the patient? Does the patient have other health problems (e.g., diabetes, asthma, hypertension, etc.)? How well were the injuries managed initially? Did the patient comply with the treatment regimen? That being said, injuries often sustained in chest trauma include fractured ribs, fractured sternum, fractured clavicles (collar bones), pneumothorax or hemothorax, cardiac tamponade, flail chest (a condition in which a part of the lung inflates out of sync with the rest of the lungs after three or more ribs have been fractured), bruising to the chest muscles, bruising to the lungs, bruising to the heart, injury to the great vessels (laceration or rupture of the aorta or vena cava), injury to the airways (crushing, laceration, or rupture of the trachea or bronchi), injury to the esophagus (laceration or rupture), diaphragmatic rupture, and internal or external hemorrhage. Abdominal injuries are also common in motor vehicle accidents, so you may also see bruising or laceration of the liver (VERY bad; the liver bleeds a lot), pancreatic injury, gallbladder injury, splenic rupture (very VERY bad, also bleeds a lot), stomach bruising and perforation, intestinal perforation (also very bad, gastrointestinal bleeds can kill in hours), bladder bruising or perforation, kidney injury (bruising, laceration or rupture), and uterine or testicular injury. You may also see vertebral fracture and spinal cord injury, pelvic fracture, and head injuries. Some of the invasive treatments you might see for these are multiple surgeries, some of which may be reconstructive; ventilator use, placement of plates, screws and wires to fix serious fractures; placement of a gastrostomy/duodenostomy/jejunostomy/ileostomy feeding tube (a tube tunneled through the abdominal wall into the stomach, or small intestine); and removal or the spleen, pancreas, gallbladder, stomach, portions of the intestines, bladder, or uterus or teste(s). Since everyone is different and heals from injuries differently, I can't tell you for sure what some of the long-term sequelae of these injuries would be, but I can make some educated guesses. The great vessels, particularly the aorta, may become weakened after injury and repair and may rupture down the road. The lungs may also be weakened following injury, leading to decreased ability to breath effectively. A damaged heart may weaken or hypertrophy (the muscle thickens), leading to heart failure. Removal of the spleen can predispose someone to infections. Removal of the pancreas creates lifelong need for insulin, glucagon, and pancreatic enzymes. Removal of the gallbladder requires a low-fat diet. Removal of the stomach requires lifelong vitamin B12 injections. Removal of parts of the intestines causes reduced absorption of nutrients and water, and the removal of a significant amount of the intestines may require an ostomy. Removal of the bladder can require construction of a neobladder or ostomies to drain urine externally. The patient may receive a kidney, liver, pancreas, lung, or heart transplant if theirs are damaged enough, which would require them to be on immunosuppressive medications for the rest of their life. Vertebral fracture and spinal cord injury may cause reduction or loss of motor or sensory function below the injury, which can lead to mobility issues, bowel and bladder control issues, and increased potential for injury due to decreased sensation. Head injuries may lead to vision and hearing problems, speech problems, amnesia, cognitive issues, and seizures. Repeated head injuries can cause dementia-like cognitive decline.

For more information on any of the above, check out the National Library of Medicine.

Happy whumping!

[three--rings]

Car Accidents for Writers and/or The Curious

So two days ago (as of first writing it's now been two weeks) I was in a major car accident at highway speed. Luckily, I'm mostly okay, my car protected me and only my heel is broken. But going through that was an experience and a very weird and foreign one so I wanted to write it down, especially for any writers depicting car crashes.

So first of all I was driving a brand new 2023 Kia Forte. A car with lots of technical bells and whistles, full modern safety everything. Thank god, although it was only 3 months old, it probably saved me from further injury.

So what happened immediately before the crash is what I'm most hazy about in my mind. I remember seeing the car on the left, it was at a crossroads where my highway traffic doesn't stop, but the crossroad traffic does. So I THINK the other car was stopped at the intersection when I first saw him, but honestly I am not sure. I saw the car, it was heading for the space in front of me, and I had time to think "he's gonna see me and stop right...what the FUCK" --impact.

(Edit: Two weeks later - Upon thinking more about it, I think that I saw him start to move but thought he was surely turning right, because he wouldn't go straight when I was right there. It would have been perfectly legal for him to turn right then. But then by the time I realized he wasn't turning and was coming right for the space in front of me...it was too late to do anything.)

Rest of the post cut for EXTREME Length as well as accident details and medical details of the ER trip both of which could be triggering. Nothing bad or gory or anything, just, some people might not want to read them.

I think I may have actually been yelling WHAT THE FUCK as I hit him. It felt like I had a split second to hit the brake, which was not nearly enough time to accomplish something. In that I did hit the brake but it barely slowed me before I hit. I was traveling around 70 mph (which is the speed limit there).

So the impact. All I remember is sudden whiteness blocking my view, along with the force, something impacting me in the face. I had a split second where I thought "Okay this is it, this is real, I might be about to die." (Note: I was also able to accurately report where on the car I hit (rear passenger door) but not the type of car. I said sedan, but it was a minivan. I said white, it was silver.)

Oh and right as the impact happened, as I saw the door of the car I was about to hit, right before the airbag popped, I had the thought/sensation of "wait, no, do it again, wait rewind, wait, reload the game." It was the sensation that I, as a gamer, have when I fuck up in a video game. The instinct that has you reach for the pause button or the reload button or whatever. That's what I felt, except of course it was real life and I couldn't try that again.

So the air bag popped and blocked all of my view, so I suddenly had no idea where I was, which way I was headed, etc. Except the car was still moving, my foot was probably/possibly still on the brake and my hands were I think still on the wheel. (All of this, I don't really know for sure.) Probably not still steering, but I feel like I was? IDK.

The next thing I knew I felt a second impact as my car hit a metal pole with a highway sign on it, shearing it off entirely. I saw the sign fly past my car through whatever gap was visible to the upper left side past the airbag. So I knew what I had hit. After that I was on grass and the car came to a pretty quick stop. (note this car also has auto-braking when it senses something in front of you, but obviously it couldn't stop itself fast enough either. )

So the car stopped and I was sitting there and my first thought was "okay I have to get out of the car." I could smell smoke and oil/fluidy smells and my car was making a bunch of weird sounds so I was scared it might catch on fire or whatever. So I reached under the side airbag which was blocking the top half of the door and opened my car door, which opened fine. I undid my seatbelt and grabbed for my phone from it's place on the center console under the dash. I knew in my dazed brain that my phone was Important. I needed to Call Someone? Maybe 911? Maybe my husband?

So, clutching my phone in a death grip (not thinking about taking anything else) I crawled under the side airbag and basically fell out of the car onto the grass.

Immediately upon trying to get out I knew my right ankle was hurt. I've had a lot of ankle sprains in my life and I looked down and saw it starting to swell and knew I couldn't stand on it.

Pretty much immediately, or within seconds there were people there. There was a gas station on the corner so either they were there or they were stopped at the intersection waiting to turn going the opposite direction from me. (God I've just thought I could have easily hit them if I'd gone left instead of right. . . that was lucky.)

The two people who arrived, who had witnessed it were a black man and a white woman, I can vaguely picture them, though couldn't pick them out of a lineup fyi. They kept offering to help me up and I told them no, my ankle is hurt, I can't stand. They asked if anyone was in the car and needed help and I said no. As new people arrived I heard them tell new people that no one was trapped. I guess I was vaguely aware that there was a second car also stopped, but I filed that under Someone Else's Problem and focused on me.

Oh wait, I've just remembered I think I was standing on one foot, holding onto the door at first, when the woman came up and asked if I was hurt. Because I was brushing off my front...so here we get into weird details okay. So I was wearing a steel boned corset under my clothes that I always wear when I go out, for back support. It's custom made by me. And I noticed right away that the impact had bent the front busk of the corset. This is a heavy duty steel busk, extra wide, so it's almost 2.5" wide piece of heavy steel. And instead of my stomach impacting the steering wheel or WHATEVER, it bent it up to almost a 90 degree angle.

So I was noticing that, but also, I thought I might be on fire. I was very HOT. My clothes were hot to the touch, the front of my dress felt like it had almost been singed. I kept touching and checking myself to make sure I wasn't on fire anywhere because of how hot my clothes felt. I assume this is from the air bags and the force of the impact and the explosions that send them out...IDK. But yeah I was hot. So I kept touching my stomach and clothes and people kept asking if I was hurt and I said "No, I don't think so, just my ankle."

At first, though, I couldn't form words. People were asking if I was okay and I couldn't answer. I think maybe I nodded. So my responses were probably more like Yes and No and "Ankle" than I remember. I just remember some serious floaty, disconnected, stunned mindset where I couldn't make words right. Lasted maybe less than a minute or a minute or two, not sure.

Basically I laid on the ground and just breathed and tried to chill for a few minutes, responding as people came up and asked me things. I think I repeated a couple of times "he just drove right in front of me..." and witnesses backed me up, saying they were there and saw the whole thing and yeah he just drove right out in front of me.

Throughout this, the surreal thing was that my car was still running and still playing my music. So poppy Janelle Monae was playing from my car. I finally was able to coordinate enough to pause Spotify on my phone so it stopped. I asked one of the bystanders if he could turn my car off with the on/off button because I was worried about it.

A state trooper arrived fairly quickly and came over and asked me first if I was hurt and if anyone else was in the car. I told him about my ankle and no. He said "okay you just sit there [on the grass] that's probably the best place for you. EMS is on their way, should be a few minutes." To which I nodded. He then asked me for my ID. I told him it was in my purse which he fetched from inside the car and handed to me to find my wallet and pull out my ID. He asked me for my basic version of the accident, which I was pretty vague about "I was driving and he just pulled right in front of my car and I only had a split second to brake."

He asked which direction I was traveling, how fast I was going. When I hesitated over that answer he said "highway speed?" and I said "yeah, 70-75." I was slightly worried about admitting I was technically speeding to a cop, but he just nodded and was very chill about everything, so I wasn't TOO worried. He asked a little more after a couple minutes like which direction the other car was coming from and which lane I was in." Then he said he was going to talk to the other driver. At which point I remembered there was another human being involved and I asked if they were okay and he said yeah seems like it, they're just a little queasy from the seatbelt.

So from where I was on the grass and not moving, basically I was sitting in the V formed by my car and the open driver door, so I couldn't see the other car and had literally no idea about the other driver, couldn't have told you their gender or race or anything. I never saw them. (Later the police gave us their details and it seems to be a man, but their name and city is literally all I know.)

At this point I was starting to feel more together. I had been playing with my phone, trying to call my husband. But for a while I couldn't make my fingers find how to call him. And then I did it, but the call wouldn't go through. I was in a fairly isolated area with poor cell coverage, it's basically in the middle of a bunch of fields of corn and cotton and shit. So I was calling but not hearing anything on the line. And meanwhile people kept talking to me and the car was honking nonstop. Even after I got him to turn off the car, it was still making honking car alarm noises. Like yes car, I know you are in distress but please shut the fuck up.

I texted my husband instead. He was texting me by then because he could hear when I called him and he knew something was WRONG. So here are the texts. It's pretty funny.

Cat totaled. Of course I didn't have my glasses so I couldn't see anything very well. I had been wearing sunglasses with bifocal reading glasses in them but they were uh, removed by the airbag. No idea what happened to them. He called me thankfully and that call worked so I told him where I was and that I was okay except for my ankle, etc. Of course I'm like the car, the poor car our new car is totaled and he's like fuck the car are YOU okay, etc.

Also when I exited the car, the witnesses kept telling me I was bleeding on my lips. I touched them and could tell my bottom lip was split. So I was like, yeah it's okay just my lip. Presumably from the impact with the airbag. It's cut on the inside from my teeth and still very swollen and in my way.

So I pulled my backup sunglasses from my purse and put them on to block the sun and laid back in the grass to chill. What sucked was that this is Texas and the grass had ants and they were crawling on me, but what could I do. I looked behind me and there was only more grass with car shrapnel and the highway which didn't look more comfortable to sit on. I asked the officer to get my tote bag out of my car, the bag with my dnd stuff which had a water bottle and can of coke in it. He got it but the coke can was totally dented and I couldn't open it. So I drank the water very gratefully because I was super thirsty.

oh and about this time the cop gave me a long speech about "You should drink a lot of water tonight and try to do some moving around because you're going to be sore and being in a car accident releases a ton of lactic acid into your body like you did a very strenuous workout...etc. " I basically just nodded and was like yeah i'm gonna be really sore.

At this point I figured I just had a sprained ankle and I would go to the er and they would check me out and I'd get an ACE bandage and be fine basically. I realized that the injury was from me trying to brake, standing on the brake and when the impact happened all that force transferred directly into my almost straight leg.

So the ambulance arrived and they came and asked the same questions. They had a bunch of people come to help get me to the stretcher. Basically they grabbed my arms and shoulders and pulled me backwards, telling me to push myself with my good leg. So I did that with them holding me up until we got to the stretcher and I sat down and swung myself around and was strapped down and lifted into the ambulance. They asked me if I had a preference for hospitals to go to and I told them the name of the big hospital nearby which I know our insurance works with because one of my doctors is there.

Then they just started asking me a bunch of medical questions about medications and conditions which I basically had to simplify, leaving out some of the minor things I have going on. Like I didn't mention depression or the antidepressant I take. I only told him some of my meds for my back. Not sure why, it just seemed like I needed to get important things across only.

He asked about where I hurt and I at that point told him about my shoulder hurting in addition to my ankle. He also told me about how bad that intersection is for accidents and how he'd been out there about an hour before for another (more minor) one and we talked about whether they needed to install a light there.

He was really nice and I liked him. I sent a text to my dnd chat while riding that told them I wouldn't be at the game. In the ambulance they checked my vitals and also took my blood sugar which I thought was kinda weird. I guess it's just standard.

We got to the ER and as they wheeled me through I heard the people saying "trauma 2, trauma 2 in room whatever, the trauma is here." So I realized that was me and they were treating me like a Serious Patient and not just an ankle. As I was rolled into the room a veritable swarm of people came with me and pulled me from the stretcher to the bed, bringing a lot of grass and dirt with me, by the way, which no one but me seemed to notice (And the nurse later).

Then they were trying to get my clothes off and a young man approached me with surgical scissors and said "Okay we're just gonna cut this off you" and I was like "No, please, can you not, I just finished sewing this!" and thankfully they were like well let's try. I was already like, I can do this, and pulling up my dress and wiggling. They probably didn't want me moving myself that much, but fuckit, I spent months on that dress I didn't want it ruined. (It ended up torn about an inch down at the neckline and has a couple inch long tear in the skirt from either me crawling out of the car or them pulling me to the stretcher.)

Oh and I had to tell them "I'm wearing a back support corset under here so it will be weird" but they were like "that's no problem" and they just reached down and pried the busk apart, (with me sucking in to help them) and pulling it free. So that was one anxiety gone. So anyway, they finally got the dress and all my shirts off while they pulled my bra free also. It's definitely weird having a swarm of people you can't really see grab you and start tearing off your clothes. I wasn't feeling at all worried about being exposed or anything, my only concern was for my clothes. Finally I was naked except for my underwear and they put a gown over me.

And then hooked up a bunch of wires and stuff. The EMT had started an IV in my hand but not given me anything. They also didn't give me anything yet, though I THOUGHT they'd hooked me up to saline or something but turned out no.

Then I talked to the doctor and repeated all my pains. They were like okay we'll get xrays and check you out all over. So they did the xrays in the bed and I had a really hard time moving my foot/ankle the way they wanted because I was like "I can't move it" and they were like, but okay flex more and I'm like "I can't." And then turn it to the side and I'm like, uh, it's not moving. And finally I had to like turn my whole body to the side to get the position they wanted.

Then they took blood and mostly left and there was one nurse left. "Can I have some water?" I asked, my most pressing concern because I was DYING of thirst. She was like "uh we have to wait and ask the doctor." And then a little while later she was like "is there anything I can get you?" and I'm like "again, water?" and she's like okay lemme go check.

So I finally got water and I asked the lady taking my blood if she could hand me my phone from my purse. So I had my phone hurray although I still had no glasses and couldn't see. But my texts showed my husband was outside so I asked if he could come back and they said sure. It still took a little while but they finally came and asked me again if family could come back and I said yes and then there he was.

Obviously that was a huge relief because I could ask him for stuff from my purse like my glasses. And we mostly just talked and looked at stuff on our phones while waiting for results. So finally the doctor comes back and is like so okay actually you have a broken heel bone and we're going to put you in a splint for now and then you will follow up with an orthopedist. And he did that and that was pretty painful. By this point they'd given me something in my IV that was helping with the pain but still having them try to force my foot upright was super painful.

Then they said they needed a urine sample and the nurse was like do you want to try a bed pan or me to do a catheter. And I'm like I guess bed pan. Which, I didn't know, is basically just a hard plastic bowl that you sit on and the edges dig into your butt and thighs. And she tries to explain how to go and I'm like okay I'll try but I totally failed. Because I was still massively dehydrated. I'm like "if you'd given me more water like I asked, I might be doing better at this." Finally they started me on IV fluids and I got my husband to get me my water bottle. Then they did a catheter except they still couldn't get urine and they did it a second time with a better nurse and finally they made me laugh and that made some come out so they made me keep laughing until they got enough of a sample. So I'm definitely making the nurse stories for that one.

By the way, did the catheter hurt. Yeah, a little. It feels like what you'd expect. It's pokey and doesn't feel good, but once it's in you can't feel it. Also I was told my "anatomy" made it easy to see what they were doing which, I'm like is that a compliment on my pussy or what?

Anyway after that it was just waiting waiting waiting. They were checking for damage to my kidneys or I guess other indicators through blood tests because they came back to draw more blood twice.

Finally like five hours after the wreck they let me go. And gave me very little information about anything, actually I could complain a lot about the way the ER handled things but like that's not the point here.

We were both obviously starving because we hadn't eaten so we had to drive through the only thing open which was a 24 hour mcdonalds.

They didn't give us crutches, just told me to use them, so we had some from when my husband was in a car wreck and wheelchair bound for months. So he had to go in the house and find those and bring them out to me. Our door is very far from the driveway so I had a long way to go on crutches and it was very difficult given my pain situation and how my shoulder and ribs on the right side hurt. So once I finally got to the door he got a rolling chair that I sat on and he wheeled me to the bedroom.

That night once the meds they gave me in the ER wore out I was in terrible terrible pain. I'm a chronic pain patient on an opioid patch and it was insane. Ten on the pain scale. I wont go into too much detail but god I wanted to die or like, just cut my foot off. I took pretty much anything I could to try to help the pain, after some quick interactions googling. And took an edible we had and that was what finally let me get any sleep about 5 in the morning once it kicked in.

It's now two weeks later and...what is recovery from a crash like that like? Well it sucks honestly. I got very lucky in my injuries but the broken heel is way more painful that I would have imagined, sometimes radiating pain all the way up my leg to the crotch. And worse than that has been the rest of my body that didn't get diagnosed with any injuries but obviously went through major trauma.

My ribs have been very sore in a couple different places, making it difficult to move, sit up, lay on one side, reach for things, laugh or cough. And I pulled something in my right shoulder though they didn't see any damage on x-rays but it's taken two weeks to start to feel like I can use my right arm much or move it without terrible pain.

I've spent most of my time on pretty heavy meds, thanks to my pain doctor, but still all the time I've been massively uncomfortable. And trying to do anything is really difficult because I have to use weird muscles to pull myself up to standing or whatever without putting weight on my right foot, and then those muscles have gotten sore. It was about two days after the accident I reached peak Body Pain, after trying to get around on crutches with an injured/bruised ribs and messed up shoulder. I got to the point I couldn't get myself up to go to the bathroom on my own at all. Thankfully then I got a kneeling scooter thing which is an absolute requirement for getting around in this state.

So yeah today is two weeks and I feel like I'm just starting to get back to almost normal functioning, except for my broken foot. Taking meds less often, and then only because the foot starts throbbing. (Did you know heels are very painful things to break? Neither did I? I'm lucky I don't need surgery because frequently this injury can cripple you if you don't have surgery.)

Anyway, I don't know if anyone will have read all this, but I feel like it's worth documenting the experience. I was originally going to post this within the first few days of the accident but then the real bad effects started kicking in and then uh, there was the Lahaina thing. (My closest family lives there. They are safe along with their house but...my little tragedy didn't feel important in the face of that.)

At any rate, please drive safely, this experience sucks and I don't recommend it.

[haisayonaraa]

Holding back tears

(WARNING: this is going to a not so happy story, it's not going to be for anyone looking for a cute upbeat story.)

[story below]

Ever since his reincarnation (thanks to writer logic) Jonathan has been well aware of age regression. At first he was slightly confused, but luckily his family was able to explain it to him. Afterwards he unintentionally picked up the role of a caregiver due to his 'magic fatherly abilities' to make littles feel small. Now a days Jonathan has been quite comfortable with this job and has even redesigned his new mansion to suit the needs of each little that he may need to care for. Seriously, this man went all out, especially after learning out how credit cards worked (he doesn't understand the fact that he has to pay it back, Speedwagon's been paying off the debt quietly).

But lately things have been different, lately Jonathan has been different. Recently he's been having thoughts about his father. Even after things where settled with Dio, and after Jonathan accepted and forgave him, he couldn't quite forget what he'd done to their father. He wasn't mad at Dio, or anyone, he just feels empty in a way he can't explain. This emptiness has sometimes caused him to feel like curling up and blocking it out. It also made him feel needy for the company of his family. But he dare not mention this, after all, he's the head of the family, the one everyone looks up to. What would it show them if he was growing upset over something he didn't even understand? And so, he pushed the feeling away until today.

Today the mansion was empty, with his family having their own personal things they where up to. This left Jonathan alone to think, reminisce, and hopefully calm down. Luckily, he did calm down, until he realized he was alone, for some reason, this felt awful.. he didn't  know why, he'd been alone before and was content with it.. maybe he just missed his family  being around him? What ever it was, the feeling of loneliness grew so heavy on him that eventually,  he broke. For the first time since his accident, he cried.

Jonathan's crying became more then just loneliness,  everything  in his life that had happened just came tumbling down on him. The loss of his father, his dog.. even the very place he grew up in. While in his sorrow, he didn't realize that he was no longer alone, that his sobbing had caught the attention of the only other person there. 

Speedwagon usually came over to the mansion  to help out with the many Littles that came and went. Sure Jonathan was usually fine with the large numbers, but speedwagon couldn't help but want to assist him. He'd  been ready to talk to Jonathan about leaving for the day, due to the lack of people, but he grew worried when he heard crying from his room. 

Speedwagon quietly entered and sat beside Jonathan  on the bed. "...Jojo?" Jonathan finally realized Speedwagon  was there,  and looked at him, "S-speedwagon- I'm so sorry you have to see me like this! I don't know what's come over me!" Jonathan looks away. "Why are you apologizing?" Speedwagon puts a hand on Jonathan's  shoulder "b-because- I'm not supposed to cry over silly little things like this.." Speedwagon looks at Jonathan,  "like what?" Jonathan meets Speedwagons eyes with his own, and there's something deep inside that could make even the toughest man's heart crumple. "I-im all alone! A-and I don't have father a-anymore, o-or danny- o-" Speedwagon  pulls Jonathan  into a hug "shhh, Jojo, it's ok" Jonathan  cries into Speedwagons shoulder, "Jojo, you know you're never alone, you have me and Erina, and the rest of your family too." Jonathan  quiets down a bit, "I don't want to bother them... they've been through so much-" speedwagon rubs Jonathan's  back,  and you've always been there for us, now it's our turn. You know Joseph always asks if you need anything" Jonathan  sighs, "but-" "but nothing. You deserve to be heard and taken care of just as much as everyone  else. Please let me help you, I want to help." Jonathan  looks at speedwagon before returning the hug.

And this is the start of something  very small for Jonathan :')

(Later, Jonathan  finds out he's  a flip. Speedwagon  and Erina both enjoy spoiling and taking  care of him. Sometimes the other Littles even get in on taking care of Jonathan :3 and for anyone  wondering,  Jonathan is the sweetest little baby, though he still needs help realizing  crying is OK, no matter what it's about)

Realized I never finished this, so I finished typing it up on my iPad here, hope you all enjoy! 

[i17iskillingmylife]

Stupid question, What did you imagine regarding a sequel of psychonauts? Like, before it came out.

will be real i am not the largest sequel individual. that is to say, i did not desire one when one did not exist. and i also wasn't thinking about it on account of there wasn't one. there's all kinds of things to be saying and extrapolating about raz and his world and his life after the events of the first game but that's more like naturally intuiting simple facts than it is thinking about a "sequel". which is something i didn't think about.

would be kind of cute though if it had been set, at least partially, in a less-immediate but not too distant future. (it's fun if some time passes but i don't want them to redesign him i've only seen ONE older raz design that's really….him……you know…..) pn 05 is so seasonal, it really feels like muggy hazy summer in that game, so it would have been fun to have another game where the camp is similarly kind of a "hub" world but is recontextualized in winter. surely there's some fun to be had redesigning the landscape not only visually but in terms of layout….snowdrifts and ice could block / grant access to new or preexisting areas. they could make raz wear a warmer outfit that's different from his usual one and i could look at him in it.

was also a little scandalized at how they treated the water curse. it's at it's best when it's real and not real - first game kind of implying that it's all in his head is charming, second game bluntly confirming that it's basically nothing and means nothing is boring. kind of makes his whole background crumble…sorry DUDE your parents raised you to believe CRAZY thing NOT REAL…..it doesn't have to be real either it's just more fun to think he grew up being very scared of this curse that may or may not actually mean something. and it's cute, too, to think of him growing up and not really ever getting confirmation on how real it is or not….he's eventually going to leave his family to go be a psychonaut, right? it's funnier to keep that curse-fear around. and it makes his upbringing less of a lame punchline.

also just so you know. in my beautiful new land that i am creating now for you there will be no gay and weird retcons of raz's backstory.he really really really does not need to be a special boy with special connections to whatever his whole deal as a guy is infinitely better and funnier if he's just some completely random kid. i don't want him to be special!

with these rules in mind i thin k i can generate an idea of the sequel i would have visualized if i had visualized one before the existence of one had been foisted upon me.

raz could go back to camp a little later, like a year or two or something, and it's winter or fall or something now so he's maybe wearing like a different weather-appropriate outfit. it's novel and cute but true to his nature and probably doesn't fit great. maybe he's got a little scarf on and you can get different ones. anyway he goes back to camp and starts a relationship with a forest animal or something. has to only be one, raz could never and would never practice polyamory of any kind. i'm taking it at face value that lili is a trust fund kid and it won't work between them long term they are destined for turbulent years of on again off again coworker romance that keeps sparking and fizzling out under various circumstances. so he can date some squirrels or foxes or does or whatever on the side. could at least be a solid b-plot or something. non-optional sidequest? whatever. when you first arrive you can wander around or whatever. sashas lab should be immediately accessible and you can go bother him and sheegor (who is voiced by jenny nicholson or someone like that now since tara strong had that really bad car accident). one of these guys can be the first level i guess. sasha should still whinge at you about obtaining consent before thrashing minds but raz should be more openly flippant about this after the cutscene like there's just no way he actually gives a shit about any of that he is far too confident in his own ability to intuit the correct course of action in any situation to care about the consent or comfort of others.

the asylum etc you can get to pretty soon but first you have to get like a saw or something to cut through the ice to free linda. actually maybe linda has passed away and instead of her you get carried over the ice (unneccessary; --> ((joke)))by a bunch of her little babies who she told about you and they love you and have funny little voices. my boss' boss' ex wifes name is linda lol. the asylum is kind of no big deal here on account of it being the last level in the first game. you should be able to ice skate around it and do little tricks that benefit you in no way and do not add to the story at all. probably loboto should be here just like chilling out or something he can be a level you can do. probably this should just be the same as the level he got in rhombus of ruin but like an actual real game that you can play and have fun in and stuff. that was a good backstory for him it's funny if he's sadstuck.

the story should involve brain theft for power generation again because it's a charming and distinct motif and i like when raz steals them back and gives them strange wet kisses. but this time maybe the evil individual in question is enforcing a beam upon the victims that causes their brains to leak out of the ears? the villain should be an electrical engineer or something like that this should be an individual who takes things. designing this thing visually is difficult for me but what i'm thinking is kind of an incarnate of jenkins, the thing what takes, like the real life jenkins but we can just put him in the game and have him wearing an electrician's outfit and he's there and he's the bad guy. just like in real life, jenkins doesn't work superfast or have a really explicit goal, but he does kind of slowly take over everything you know and leaves darkness and lightlessness in his wake. so to add some urgency i think victims of jenkins should become infected with somethingin the cavity where their brains used to be. some kind of fungus or something. there isn't an actual timer on this it's just kind of a concept in the story that makes things feel like they matter more later on. you explore and encounter RANDOM INDIVIDUALS and help them in their various plights and in return acquire items that allow you to progress. you have and maintain the point and click moe it doesnt go away it's there, right there, with you in the room the whole time. i don't have specific level ideas but i have worked out mindscape designs for several different characters from other franchises, most famously spades slick from homestuck so i think it's cool if he's here too maybe you find him in a bunker or something with his crew and connive / force your way into his mind with dubious if any consent and find yourself in hsi strange mind level with lots of slimy black goop all over a card-themed subway and city and mobster-themed brain enemies. that's just my idea i don't think it could be that hard to get hussie on board with this because he obviously doesnt really care that much about the midnight crew anyway.

anyways the plot should be really straightforward you fend jenkins off and save whoever and then the game ends. post credits cute images show razs new life with his forest animal life partner. here's some images i created of the romance sequences one of them is in first person

[moon-down47]

guhh I'm being paranoid about everything and I just wanna say I don't support pansear because of the whole thing that happened back in May and that was when I originally stopped supporting her. In general her fanbase also unnerved me slightly and everything felt parasocial to me. Hearing her say "gr*oming can be done on accident" in her server (screenshots given by my friend who was in the server) just made me even more scared because it makes my own experiences feel invalidated despite everything I have been through, and I wouldn't doubt it could have made others feel similar.

I don't think she is a good person but the way people paint her isn't right, I don't know what to believe or trust anymore, but I am going to stay unbiased as I am not and never was truly involved, and I don't want to get involved. My own opinions stay with everything that happened in May and the things I have been shown she has stated to her whole server. Unless there is actual proof about those screenshots or the alligations I don't think I can trust anyone.

My involvment in ERC has likely gotten me blocked by a few people, but understand I am not there to try and erase her image or srit anything up, that was never the intentions of me or Gerber, we wanted to do a good thing by giving out free emotes with the help of multiple other artists, especially in such a time like this for the Rain World fandom, which I feel, has been going through a active downfall since late 2023 with how the people in the fandom have been active towards each other and others. As someone who joined pre-downpour, I can say I am fairly disappointed with everything, but I hold hope that things will improve in the future. With The Watcher coming out early next year, I hope that it will bring the community together and bring in more positive members.

It is difficult for me to use her emotes or look at her art a lot of the time, as I greatly disliked her statements on gr*oming being something that can accidentally happen when the whole definition of it is manipulation. Manipulation isn't something that can be done on accident. Her emotes are incredibly accessible, she has one of the largest collections out there and plenty of servers (such as my own) have used them at one point or another. I understand that it can be a struggle to seprate art from artist at times, so we simply want to give people an alternative, we're not trying to erase her. While yes, those emotes do share her identity, we want to try and give each emote it's own. For some people this doesn't work, and I understand that, but please understand we are not trying to erase her from the fandom, but this doesn't mean I support the account actively working to archive her art, she deleted everything for a reason, and I think we should respect that instead of trying to bring everything back.

I won't support anyone that was actively praying for her downfall, or anyone that was "excited" that she deleted everything. She did bad, she isn't a good person, but we don't even know if the screenshots or accusations are true, the fact you were praying for someone to leave and that they'd fall speaks more volume and shows who you are as a person, and you acutally disgust me.

I believe all we know is what was actually true and given proof, and that's all we should believe.

All I want is to draw emotes and give to the community what was ultimately taken in a sense, the server stands as an alternative, and only that. I do not care if you continue to use her emotes, I can seprate art from artist, but for some people and myself included, it is hard to step into those servers, especially with everything going on.

[raichana]

15 Questions Meme

another super fun tag from @card-queen here

Rules: Answer the 15 questions as your OC or yourself. Tag up to 15 people.

Tagging: @teresashiho and @prilaja-artblog, anyone else who wants to try!

Teach me more about your characters! Please!

Are you named after anyone?

Raichana: My father named me after someone named in a prophecy. He wanted to prove it wouldn't come true... Darious: no comment Arianna: Apparently it's a family name but I can't find anyone in our history with that name. Ciella: no comment...

When was the last time you cried?

Raichana: What time is it? uh...a few hours ago? Darious: If I cry it would make Rai cry so I avoid doing it in front of her. Arianna: You think I have time to cry, i'd much rather spend that time making some coin. Ciella: Crying isn't the easiest for me, Still i guess in the last hundred years or so?

Do you have kids?

Rai and Darious: *looks at each other and blush*Maybe one day Arianna: No but I did accidently start and orphanage so i guess that counts? Ciella: Define child, I have created a lot of 'Children' but I am unable to have any myself.

Do you use sarcasm?

Raichana: *stares out into space head empty* whats that? Darious: No Arianna: Oh yes, all the time. Ciella: I'm unable to lie and sarcasm can tread too close to untruths so unfortunately no.

What’s the first thing you notice about others?

Raichana: How easy it is to read their mind, Once I thought someone had completely blocked my telepathy but no they just had no thoughts at all ever! Darious: Weaknesses in their defenses. you can never be too careful Arianna: rings, jewlery, shoes... anything to let me know if they are the type my guide may be interested in. Ciella: Any sign of illness or discomfort, I want to help as many people as possible.

What’s your eye colour?

Raichana: Technically brown but I store light in them so they look gold! Darious: they were apprently blue when I was younger but they are red now Arianna: the one that's still there is Green Ciella: *clutches locket* what a silly question, you can see they are amber, theres no other colour they could be... ha ha

Scary stories or happy endings?

Raichana: Happy endings! Scary things are no fun Darious: I actually think Scary stories are better, not everything can have a happy ending it makes no sense. Arianna: Scary stories, mostly so I can use them to scare Raichana Ciella: Happy endings, i've seen too many horrors over the years i'd rather things be full of joy.

Any special talents?

Raichana: *bounces* I can bend light which allows me to create illusion or even attack with concentrated light! I'm also psychic but I can't control it at all so it's not really a talent. Darious: I can bend darkness but it's only really good for hiding things when it's already dark or creating a blade. Arianna: I can travel through shadows, it's handy but if it's too dark I can't actually use it so it's pretty limiting without a lightsource.

Where were you born?

Raichana: According to Mom I was born in a town really far away but we had to move to the forest for our safety. Darious and Arianna: A hidden village called Haven, Only Demon elves can travel there. Ciella: *sweating* well... uh... when you have lived as long as I have.... you dont always know these things.... ha ha

What are your hobbies?

Raichana: This journey doesn't allow for much time for hobbies but I really like dancing! Darious: I enjoy to cook... it's partially a hobby and partially because if I let anyone else cook i'll probably die. Arianna: I collect rare plants... sure it tends to double as a good source of poison for work but it's still a hobby. Ciella: I spend most of my time working in the apothecary but in my free time I enjoy learning how to grow and brew tea blends.

Do you have any pets?

Raichana, Darious and Arianna: nope Ciella: I have tried but they all turn into feycreatures eventually so I have stopped trying.

What sports do you play/have played?

Raichana: I tried to participate in Haven's hunt once but I couldn't catch anything. Darious and Arianna: the hunt have put on every winter.... Ciella: I have tried many sports over the years but buy the time i go to play it again all the rules have been interpreted differently so I avoid sports.

How tall are you?

Raichana: 5'2"! but i'm still a growing girl! (spoilers no she isn't) Darious: 6'2" But I am part elf so I may still have a few more inches to grow (spoilers he does) Arianna: 5'6" Ciella: ha ha I'm also 5'6".... what a completely random coincidence... ha ha

Favourite subject in school?

Raichana: Lucian's school suuucked... there were only four of us there and he wouldn't teach me any of the training lessons, Darious had to train me after the sun went down! Darious: *blushing* Training rai after class was probably my favourite school subject. Arianna: School? the closest thing I had to that was training and well... I think if you like learning all about butchering and poisons it's kind of fun? Ciella: Dad taught me everything I could ever even imagine trying to learn, I can't pick a favourite it's all so important to me.

Dream job?

Raichana: Dancer! unfortunately I have another job lined but I'm going to try and make sure my sister stays in that role, she's currently doing it and is better then I could ever be! Darious: The idea of thinking about the future is hard for me, I don't think I have as dream job... Arianna: Imagine taking a job other then working for the guild.... I'm in this for life one way or another... Ciella: I'm already working my dream job at the Apothecary... I get to help people every day... It's much better then what I did in the past...

[vintagepresley]

What do u think about Priscilla defending the colonel and calling him a wonderful man. her making elvis burn his spiritual books and then her and the colonel try to make him lose contact with Larry.

I actually have a lot to say about this because I feel like people only focus on what /she/ does and not the other people around him. Do people realize that other people in his circle also defended the Colonel? More than she had. Jerry's book he literally praises the man for his work ethic and doesn't say one bad thing about. But that he actually respected him, while also saying that he did have his flaws. Some of the guys would snitch on what Elvis would do and run back to the Colonel to tell him. I feel like she defended him not as much as everyone else, but she obviously didn't have a bad thing to say about him. But she also didn't spend much time with the Colonel as every else did. I feel like she didn't see or was around everything that was happening and the decisions he was making.

Now onto the spiritual books and Larry.. I love Larry and everything he wanted to teach Elvis. But another thing people forget but only seem to blame Priscilla for (because somehow she was the only one in his life that's the "villain" when she's far from it.) But I digress. A lot of the members of the MM hated Larry.. HATED him. If anyone read his book yes he mentions Priscilla didn't care for him but she also didn't work with the others to get rid of him. She didn't approve of what he was doing and how he was changing Elvis, but she also knew when to mind her business. It was his MM that said terrible and anti Semitic things about Larry and would work with the Colonel to get rid of him and lie on him. Everyone besides Jerry. Now I don't agree with her burning his books and that was wrong, but she just also didn't understand the journey he was on and that's fair. It's not for everyone and I wish she didn't burn his books.

But yeah, that's my insight on that. I really wish that people would stop making this woman look so evil and like disregard everyone else's actions in his life. The other women included and only come for her. Honestly, while I'm ranting I wish people would do more research or even read her book again. She never painted him as monster as people claim. She never called him abusive, she never said he raped her. These were things people assumed just from reading it. The pillow fight situation she even said in her book that it was an accident and how sensitive he was towards her about it. She never said he raped her or assaulted her. All she said was that he was a bit rougher than he had usually been. I just.. People are being so dramatic about this woman and I know she's not perfect. No one is. But she never made Elvis look like some monster. 90% of her book is her talking highly of him and how sensitive he was towards. While the other 10% was the bad side of their relationship. Yeah, she may have taken things back but she never technically said it never happened. Just it didn't happen to that extreme. But she also wasn't the only person in his life to shed light on the "bad" side of him. His friends and his other women have too. Why don't any of you put them on the chopping block like Priscilla? Because I'd like to talk about that.

Lastly, because I continue to see this being talked about but there's no solid proof or proof at all because I've searched all over it and on Elvis forums. But there's no proof that she didn't want Lisa with Michael because she didn't want black grandchildren. NO PROOF. Even in the Elvis forums I was searching people said it had to of been a rumor because no one had publicly said that. It's just odd how people in this fandom want the truth to be spoken about Elvis, but then spread rumors that have no concrete proof linked to it. I don't get it.

But anyway, this is my insight on things. I'm tired of talking about Priscilla all the time as I've stated over and over. The amount of hate this one woman gets is crazy to me that I've now started to feel bad for her. Why continue to talk about it? Her family? Especially after Riley has spoken out. I know it makes a lot of people feel better to think Priscilla brainwashed her or she can't think for herself, because it's just adding more fuel to the fire to hate this woman. But you ever stop and think that maybe she knows her grandmother, her family more than any of us? That she doesn't hate her grandmother because as she stated. She was never anything more than grandma to her. She doesn't see her as we see her. She sees her just as everyone else sees their grandparents. Not this famous figure.

But anyway, sorry this went over what you asked. But I just needed to rant and I guess found my moment to do so, lol.

[creature-feature-creature]

VERY IMPORTANT!! PLEASE READ!!

Since this is gaining wayy more attention than I thought it ever would, here's a little intro/rules sheet I made!

Hi! I'm Kayak! (@kayak-lmao)(she/they) This is a sideblog I made to rate your favorite real-world creatures as well as any from fiction! I mainly do these through the ask box, but I sometimes do ones I think of myself. This was heavily inspired by blogs like @videogamecows, so be sure to check those guys out! :]

What do I mean by creature?

Anything living that is non-human. Yes, this means that plants count. These can be real or fictional! That's why I used the word "creature" instead of animal. Bacteria, plants, or anything that isn't animal are still super cool to me and I enjoy looking at them :)!!

RULES (PLEASE READ)

simplified versions at end

Please don't spam asks. If I didn't answer your ask yet, I'm probably busy. Spamming will only make me not want to answer you and will probably result in a block.

While I may praise and adore fictional creatures, that does not mean I agree with the things their creator says. I don't want to exclude myself from certain media just because the creator is a shithead. Check rule 8 for what I specifically do not condone.

No ocs :(. I love when people make original characters but this would just turn into a rate-my-oc page if I counted those.

If I give your submission a bad rating, please don't harass me over it. I'm entitled to an opinion, good or bad. I try to be positive but if I genuinely don't like something I'll say it.

PLEASE correct me if I get information wrong. I don't want to spread misinformation, even if it's just for a niche indie game.

When sending media, please make the subject clear. Also please try and avoid links. The only links I will click on is YouTube and if the content is inappropriate you will be blocked and reported.

If including an image with gore, blood, body horror, or any other common triggers, please include a TW above the image as the first things viewers see is said image. If it doesn't have a tw when it needs one, I unfortunately cannot answer it because I don't want to accidently trigger anyone.

Just try to be nice. Don't use hateful language or send any characters that were designed with the point of making fun of something/someone

I don't want racists, transphobes, homophobes, ableists, anti-semists, neo-n*zis or any other hateful people here. Do not try to argue with me over this. I will block you. This is not a space for you, and it never will be.

I have the right to make/change rules whenever I want. It's my sideblog, and if I find something new that I don't want here i can make it a rule. I'll reblog and eventually delete the rb when I do update the rules.

Ok thats all for now! Thank you for reading that all if you did :].

Simplified lists for specifics

1.) Spam. 2.) Problematic creators

3.) Ocs. 4.) Bad ratings

5.) Wrong info. 6.)Images or links?

7.) Trigger warnings 8.) Be nice.

9.) Who this isn't for 10.) Adding Rules

[usafphantom2]

B-2 bombers fly again next week after a six-month safety break

Fernando Valduga By Fernando Valduga 05/21/2023 - 20:16 in Military

The B-2 Spirit is returning to the skies, U.S. Air Force officials said. The first aircraft is projected to take off on May 22, after a break in flight operations due to a safety break.

The return to flight was recently approved by the head of the Air Force Global Attack Command (AFGSC), General Thomas A. Bussiere, after a safety break of approximately six months after an accident in December.

“The safety pause of the B-2 fleet has been officially suspended,” said Maj. Gen. Andrew J. Gebara, commander of the 8ª Air Force, which controls the country's fleet of strategic bombers. "General Bussiere, on my recommendation, made a final determination on the necessary actions and approved the return to flight."

B-2 bombers at Whiteman Air Base.

Gebara and other USAF officers refused to say what the security problem was or what was done to allow the service to resume flight operations.

“I would like the safety pause not to be necessary,” Gebara said. "But I think it was very important for us to find out what happened and make sure that everything was mitigated before you started flying again, and that's what we did."

Gebara said there would be no onerous restrictions on the missions.

“I want them to come back in a disciplined and deliberate way,” Gebara said. "But we will do full operational missions. Therefore, you will not see flight circuit and landings. It will be a normal outing. In fact, I'm not at all concerned about the aspects of the force's mission."

He said there would be a “phased approach” as the fleet returned to flight, with the most experienced pilots sitting first and “several weeks to get the entire community back at speed.”

Pilots of the B-2 bombers continued training on T-38 Talon jets.

But Gebara added a warning note to America's opponents: "This is different, however, from having enough pilots for any necessary mission if there is a crisis."

The U.S. Air Force refused to reveal the exact cause of the accident, which temporarily blocked the only runway at Whiteman Air Base, Montana. The service also refused to detail what actions were taken to suspend the security pause. The break began in late December, after a B-2 was damaged after an emergency landing on December 10 in Whiteman - the only base to host combat B-2s, assigned to the 509ª Bomber Wing and its National Air Guard associate, the 131ª Bomber Wing.

Incident with B-2 in September 2021.

Bussiere, a B-2 pilot and former commander of the 509º Bomb Wing, took over the AFGSC a few days before the accident.

Air Force officials said the aircraft remained ready to perform missions, if necessary, playing a critical role as the only stealth bomber with nuclear capacity in service in the country.

“The B-2 fleet can still carry out missions, if necessary,” Gebara said. "Our ability to provide nuclear deterrence has never stopped."

The B-2 drivers spent some time during the safety break in the advanced simulators in Whiteman and increased the repetitions in the T-38 coaches. Only 21 B-2 were produced, costing more than $1 billion per plane, according to the USAF. One was destroyed in an accident in 2008. Nineteen of the current fuselages are in Whiteman - one of which is a test aircraft normally based in Edwards, California. A combat B-2 was stationed at Pearl Harbor-Hickam Joint Base, Hawaii, which shares runways with Daniel K International Airport. Inouye in Honolulu after the safety pause took effect while the aircraft was at the base.

It is not clear what will happen to the damaged B-2 in December. The entire B-2 fleet will eventually be replaced by the B-21 Raider, which like the Spirit, is a stealth flying wing produced by Northrop Grumman. The first B-21 is scheduled to fly later this year.

The Air Force Global Attack Command has conducted regular maintenance of all B-2, and officers from the 509ª Bomber Wing and Gebara said that the little-observable stealth coating, which is critical to the B-2 nuclear mission, was well taken care of.

Despite a pause in operations, Gebara said that the nuclear deterrence of the United States was not hampered.

“It's hard to get into the head of another country and find out how they feel,” Gebara said. "I don't think it would be wise for them to doubt our deterrence, and I'm reasonably confident that they don't."

Source: Air Force & Space Magazine

Tags: Military AviationNorthrop Grumman B-2 SpiritUSAF - United States Air Force / U.S. Air Force

Fernando Valduga

Fernando Valduga

Aviation photographer and pilot since 1992, has participated in several events and air operations, such as Cruzex, AirVenture, Daytona Airshow and FIDAE. He has works published in specialized aviation magazines in Brazil and abroad. Uses Canon equipment during his photographic work around the world of aviation.

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[esther-dot]

“We all knew we weren’t getting ADOS, but I truly thought we’d be getting TWOW soon, except, considering how many shows he’s consulting on now, I’m beginning to worry” yeah I mean the comments on his twitter are always about TWOW 🤣 but the truth is he loves TV, it’s a medium he has always worked for, and apparently he is enjoying writing for the HBO shows so good for him I guess?

I think HBO is trying to distance themselves a little bit from the GOT finale by giving all these side shows the green light but not Snow. Because Snow is still too close to the original show and people are still pissed. The amount of hate directed at Kit (and interestingly at Sophie) when Snow was announced was awful to watch.

I think is better for everyone if we look at the TV universe as a separate thing from the books. Some shows maybe watchable and entertaining. As for the books is pretty obvious to me Martin is having a huge writer’s block and he has put himself into a corner with the time jump. I still have hope we may still get TWOW. 😬

(Continuation of this convo)

I think HBO is trying to distance themselves a little bit from the GOT finale by giving all these side shows the green light but not Snow. Because Snow is still too close to the original show and people are still pissed. The amount of hate directed at Kit (and interestingly at Sophie) when Snow was announced was awful to watch.

You know, Martin's blog post talked about how long it takes to get a show off the ground, but I'm wondering if you're right about this because apparently they have been talking about the Snow show for years already, and considering that Kit is attached, he already has people on it and they've already met with Martin, it is interesting that they hadn't announced or even mentioned anything even though we'd heard about the other possibilities? As far as I know, what did come out was an accident, so I don't even know when they'd disclose it to the public if they had their druthers.

The Targ fan reaction to Kit's rather innocuous comments from that one interview were so overboard, and frankly, scary, maybe they are hoping HOTD would calm them down, and the promise of other shows keep them in the fold in spite of how furious they are. Something else to consider is the general chaos of whatever the heck is going on over at HBO and everyone's realization that the move to streaming may have a downside, so it's also possible how they do business is changing, and that impacts the pace at which this stuff moves.

While I certainly agree that the shows and books are distinct, I still think a lot of plot points from GoT came from Martin’s plans for ASOIAF, D&D just scrambled them into nonsense in the delivery 😂

Also, I’m genuinely surprised how happy Martin is about all the HBO shows! I mean, I’d be happy too about all that money, but as someone whose pretty disgusted with the whitewashing of Targs, it’s disconcerting to see how pleased he is with their end result.

[kepesktribe]

Writers game: First sentences.

Rules: post the first sentence of your last ten fics. If you haven't written ten fics, share as many first-sentences as you have.

(I haven't written a fic in a while, so RP's is going to have to do. Luckily I have a few AU's in progress. Also... I may do more than just a sentence for each. Some aren't the start of the AU though, since my rp partner made some of the starters... but they are part of my first reply to the starters.)

Tagged: @elveny Thank you so much! I actually enjoyed this one because I get to show a bit of my AUs and writing. I think I have too many AUs. Lmao

Tagging: This is a lot... so I am going to just say anyone who wants to do it.

The princess and the merman. (Sybil x Abela fairytale AU)

Once there was a prince of the sea who had been lost since he was little. His memories carried the voices of family, grown distant through time, and the glow of light from above.

2. Knightly Memoria (Janlenoux x Adelphel amnesia AU. With the help of Sybil, the two live in Gridania and work for Sybil under fake identities as members of his squadrons. Jan loses his memories after an accident.)

Sybil paced the edges of a newly formed hole in Issom-Har. From above, a remainder of last night's rain dropped from a leaf to slip under his collar.

3. Knightly Memoria 2.0 (Janlenoux x Adelphel. Role reversal amnesia AU. This time Adelphel is the one to lose his memory while out helping Abela in "The Hundred Throes".)

Steel clashed against steel, two daggers against a single broad sword and a shield. Janlenoux spun as he came in with his shield to block a rather well done but slow strike of one of Meuliaire's blades.

4. Blood Dripped Rose (Another victim, devoid of blood. A single card decorated with the stamp of a blood dripped rose. "I'm Sorry." Written in shaken handwritting. {Vampire Florentel/Detective Sorrel AU})

The Jeweled Crozier, ever bustling with life regardless of anything happening elsewhere in Ishgard. Merchants called out to get the attention of possible customers. Tableware, blankets, easy to store foods. Each stall housed unique wares to fit anyone's needs. People haggling filled the air and children ran between one person and another.

5. Beneath the Stars (Prophet Florentel and disgraced hero Sorrel AU)

Fire rained down upon stone and soil, smoke filling the air and choking it. Even the moon hid from the sight below. Lingering monsters prowled the destroyed town, feeding upon inhabitants that had not made it out. Silence followed the sounds of despair, deafening in the night. Yet it was that silence, a bubble around the town, that soon was heard the slow treading of footsteps. The ringing bell of boots, purposeful in making, splitting the air.

6. Wilted Wings (Angst AU Florentel x Sorrel. Literally made this AU for the pain. At least they will get a happy ending... eventually. Can't say the same for Aruktai and Otome in this one though.)

Kazeninotte had stayed behind, lingering as the other void users slowly began to trickle out after their moment with Sorrel. A warm smile tilted her lips as she listened to Zeneroseus complain about the energy used up and his immediate deserving of a nice nap. She didn't argue. He did deserve it.

7. Free Wings (Fluff AU Florentel x Sorrel. Takes place in WoL Sybil's timeline where Florentel (My actual shard of Azem) actually did die at birth and thus was reborn after the events of MSQ where peace mostly exists... and falls in love with Sybil's son, Sorrel. Beginning starts during an Ishgardian Ball.)

If there was one thing he wanted to be doing, it was not this. Over the heads of those gathered, stunning blue took on a veiled mask. It wasn't that he did not like these kinds of things. It was that he attracted the wrong kind of attention during them.

This is where I run out of currently active or finished AUs and I don't remember posting order of my drabbles... so you get drabbles at random from here out.

8. Scars (How my half blind Miqo bard, Mikh'to, got his face scars. Song is "My Ladies Eyes" from the 'The Last Herald-Mage' book series by Mercedes Lackey. My favorite books.)

"The days may speed, and then, I heartward hie, I flee, I fly, To see her eyes again." Mikh'to sang to the sounds of his harp, each word between a pluck of strings. Around him tavern dwellers drank and cheered to one of his most requested songs.

9. Unnamed (Janlenoux had a dream of when he got his eye scar.)

Janlenoux sighed as he leaned back into his pillows, which he had propped up against the wall at the head of the bed. As comfortable as he was, he still didn't like how he was made to rest for a few days. Reaching a hand up, he hovered it over his bandaged eye but refused to touch the still fresh wound.

10. Unnamed (Pasithea, as her Ancient self, while working on a project... a flower whose spores strengthen the gift of soul sight. It.. uh.. fails.)

Bright, curious eyes peered at the oddly shaped, large flower. "Oh, I think I shall have to rework the size. Perhaps remove the sporehead and settle for a more elegant, petal design too. I have created something much too unsightly."

[zachsgamejournal]

PLAYING: The Legend of Zelda

This game is hard, but an impressive achievement for 1986. I'm shocked by how many Zelda staples are present here, turning almost every following Zelda game into a prettier derivative.

I can't remember where I left off but I've completed a few more dungeons. I already had the bow and boomerang. I have since discovered a raft (that only goes in one direction), a...ladder...that lets me cross single-block gaps of water, and a "better" boomerang. OH and I got the Master Sword!!

I'm finding the dungeons out of order. I'm not sure how the game can be played in order organically, though I did find the first dungeon first. Happy accident I guess. But the second or third dungeon I completely missed. It's actually hard to get to and I had to use an online map to find it. I've heard that the game came with a map included, so it's not quite cheating.

I started finding hearts! Which seems happy except it's harder to max out my hearts and gain a shooter sword. I have to buy healing potions now.

After beating the 4th dungeon, I got brave and accidentally stumbled upon the 6th dungeon. I thought I could handle it. I. Could. Not. Every rooms is a frustrating fight that may help me gather resources or just...die. By the time I get to the dragon boss I am down to 2-3 hearts. And the boss is a real asshole. Also, right before the boss there's an old man that says, "Have you gotten the sword from the mountain" or something like that. Like dude, tell me this shit before I start the pain in the ass dungeon.

So I went and got the Master Sword. It was pretty easy. I think I tried to get it before and they were like, no. But now they just gave it to me. No idea.

I've also discovered there are dark rooms that can likely be lit by candles. But I don't buy candles because I'm frugal. There's also bunny bad guys that are present in Link's Awakening. I keep being impressed by the fact that this really old game on a simple system has so much depth and creativity. So while I love Ocarina of Time, everything there is basically present in some form from the beginning.

Speaking of music. I got the flute. I don't know what it does besides annoy the boss of that dungeon. But what it took to get the flute is why I will never play through this game again. It's too fucking hard!

There's these "knights" and they can only be damaged from behind. They have 5+ hit points. And every time you try to get behind them, they'll randomly about face. They killed me so many times. And as far as I know, there's no other weapon that can help. I did a save state right outside a room filled with them and it took me about an hour to beat them. I even had to leave and buy a health potion to use my magic. Even with a magic sword, I relied mostly on luck to get through this part. Given that the game has almost no story, I'm not compelled to "enjoy" this game again. But I respect what it was and its impact on games. So I'm gonna push through it.