#also i realize that asking a group of people that actively choose to read my little blog because they like me

[livvyofthelake]

hey. Group Member definitely isn’t in love with me right. i didn’t mean to overthink anything last night but as we all know it can happen. am i the biggest asshole on planet earth or can we confidently say i’m too off putting for anyone to be into. if you guys were in a group with me. and i sometimes argued with you about stupid shit and other times acted like you were my favorite human being in the universe. and consistently did freak shit. and you let me cheat off you for multiple homework assignments without me even asking. and i referred to our film that only i wrote as “our” baby not including the third person in our group. and you always offered to walk with me to my car when you literally live on campus. if that was you what would you think of me

[a-dauntless-daffodil]

What do you think Charlie's main flaws are? I see her not listening to others especially when she's close to what she wants, naivete, impulsiveness, and overly trusting nature.

meeeeehhhhhhhhh, seeing a crappy world and deciding to believe it can be better and that you're gonna treat it that way no matter how many crappy people call you stupid for it isn't a flaw in my book.

She's energetic but I wouldn't call her impulsive. Every major thing she does in s1 is usually part of a bigger dream she's been working on for a long while now.

She admits to Vaggie that she thought things would be easier but that still means she's been THINKING about it. She plans out group activities ahead of time and adjusts them depending on what's been going on- coming out from the Angel Dust thing with the idea of talking about boundaries and stuff. Same thing after the thing on the roof with Vaggie.

Sometimes she makes what feels like an well planned choice, go try to work out more hotel time for Angel Dust, put Vaggie in charge of trust building since she's (supposedly) also a sinner but one who's already learned this. Then she realizes in the middle of it that there's more here than she thought and she's suddenly a horrified bull in a tea shop trying to figure out how to get out without breaking more stuff.

Socially she's eager and wants to listen to people, she's just not a natural at it or at reading between the lines- at least not in hell where everyone's got trauma and most of the population is actively inflicting more of it on everyone else.

I can't call her overly trusting either.... she chooses to trust, sure, as part of her belief people can change, but it takes her being at her LOWEST POINT before she makes even ONE small deal with Alastor, for example, and she does NOT take that lightly. She expected him to ask for her soul, she warned him she wouldn't hurt people for him. She knows those are things he's capable of, and that he'll probably try twisting the deal somehow anyway.

And she's not unware her friends have done are doing and probably will do bad things. That's where the redemption thing comes in.

Her whole thing is knowing souls did horrible stuff to end up in her home, and not liking that horrible stuff at all, and thinking sinners sTILL shouldn't get destroyed over it.

Her not listening to people- well yeah, she's used to being told she's an idiot and her ideas are hopeless and she should care less about others and lie to people more. Now though her ideas are actually starting to become real things with real results like a hotel and people staying at that hotel and the people staying in the hotel actually starting to get along instead of just hating or murdering each other-

so s1 is her swinging between massive highs of confidence and decisive action and then crashing down into guilt self-blame and misery whenever the ideas that seemed to be working suddenly stop working for her.

and then she corrects course and tries again. It's not like she doesn't REALIZE when she oversteps or fucks up, she just doesn't notice it while it's happening, so it takes her a pretty normal hot second to reflect and go Oh and work on avoiding that specific thing next time.

if it's something she's actively managing or adjusting for then for me that's not a flaw, it's a personality trait.

Kinda like how Vaggie's personality is being strict and sharp tempered but her flaw is being so shamed of her secrets not even the threat of blackmail can pry them out of her until it fucks up the one thing she cares about most.

For Charlie the only real "flaw" I see is she's not got much experience actually figuring out WHAT she's feeling and why. Hence the occasional bursts of actual flaming fury and needing Rosie's help looking at and processing the Vaggie secret reveal thing.

She copes with the whole "mom missing people dying no one will listening to me dad disconnected" mess by ignoring how that makes HER feel and pouring herself into how she can make OTHERS feel, aka

"Don't worry, mom. I'll make you proud"

That's not a very sustainable way to cope with bad things happening to and around you.

I think Charlie needs a good long break down. Full on sobbing. Not about having failed anyone (her crying outside Angel's door) or losing anyone she loves (Sir Pentious, Dazzle) or being scared she'll lose them (curled up in bed angry and terrified vaggie might have been lying about loving her too).....

for once I want her to be sad just about herself, her sadness, her pain, her loneliness, her feels as a person named Charlie instead of the princess of hell who's trying to save the souls that heaven has already decide to damn.

Lucky she does have Vaggie and Vaggie gave a small nudge in this direction with the whole "and in the end if it's only me you've saved" thing, so odds feel good Charlie'll get there someday.

....buuuut that's just me an what i see when i look at her XD bubbly dramatic repressed girlie on main~

[dandylovesturtles]

Whats Draxum’s redemption arc in sideline look like (if he even gets one lmaooo)

thanks for the ask! this got long so I'm putting a lot of it under a cut

at this point, I have committed to Draxum's redemption arc in Sidelined, because I like Draxum and I love a good redemption arc haha. That said, as I've said a few times before, it wouldn't be easy for him, and it definitely wouldn't go down like in the show, where Mikey just kind of drags him into it. he'd have to work for it himself

it's probably good to start this by talking about my own interpretation of Draxum and the Draxum characterization I'm working with in this AU. while I love a good Evil Bastard Draxum, in canon I read him as more of one of those people who truly believed he was the hero so hard he tipped over into villainy on accident. which doesn't mean he didn't enjoy what he was doing, and he's definitely uncaring of the lives around him (he's got some of that mad scientist spark), but in contrast to the Foot Clan who are actively trying to subjugate the whole world (presumably under the belief that they'll get to be the top brass in the new world order), Draxum is actually just trying to save his people. a noble end, even if the means he's choosing involves eradicating another race of beings entirely. and I'm generally of the belief that if Draxum had actually kept the turtles, if he had been in charge of their raising, he might have initially started out thinking of them purely as warriors to be molded for his aims, but eventually would have come to see them as their own people, as children (yes, it's entirely possible to raise children and still have disregard for them as people, but I'm giving Draxum the benefit of the doubt in this one).

however, Draxum didn't raise them from babies - they just showed up at his house one day, raising weapons against him and blowing up his lab. so he's still thinking of them purely as warriors - young and inexperienced warriors, sure, but warriors nonetheless. he's not really thinking about how they're only teenagers, about how they might have dreams and wants and needs that have nothing to do with fighting, how they actually love and care for each other as a family. I said this in another ask, but Draxum thinks the idea of them calling each other "brothers" and Lou Jitsu "father" is actually laughable. in his mind, it's just pointless to even read any kind of family structure into their relationship. they are at most superiors and subordinates.

when Draxum put Leo in the Dark Armor, Splinter saw it as his fourteen-year-old son, his Baby Blue, being tortured and possibly killed right before his eyes. Draxum saw it as sacrificing a pawn in front of a general.

of course, callous disregard for a living person is bad no matter how you see it, but there's still a definite difference in perception here.

it's not until 1, Draxum realizes he was horribly wrong about what the Armor is and what the consequences of awakening it are, and 2, he witnesses the way the family reacts to what is happening to Leo, not as group of warriors down a man but as a family desperately trying to save a loved one, a piece of themselves, that it finally clicks for him what he's done.

Draxum goes on a long soul-searching retreat after that (he's also hiding from the Hidden City government but that's a side note). how could the love he had for his people drive him down such a dark and reckless path? how could he not see what was right in front of him, until he caused serious damage to the place he was trying so hard to save? how could he be so callous to someone who, annoying as he may be, is ultimately innocent?

initially he does this soul-searching far away from the Hamatos. he still has his powers in this timeline, so he makes do with stealing and finding places to take over and live. but at some point he starts thinking, maybe he wants to try and make amends for what he did, even if it's in just a small way. and even with his humbling he's still a little full of himself, so he's like, of course this ragtag bunch would want the help of Baron Draxum

(they do not)

so he starts by trying to give them practical help. he can imagine that Leonardo has significant medical issues following his time in the armor, and while it's not his primary field he knows enough about healing draughts to get by, and while there's no magic potion that will "fix" Leo, there are ones that can help with the pain and fatigue, in some ways better than human medicines, and that can help strengthen his immune system. He tries to give these to the Hamatos (specifically Mikey and Donnie while they're out scavenging one day) and gets pretty soundly rebuffed. Donnie is in "kill on sight" mode, and while Mikey is more likely to at least hear Draxum out, he also has no reason to trust anything the man gives them, especially when he suggests they feed it to Leo. so they don't take the offerings initially. Draxum eventually settles for leaving them in a cache near one of the sewer tunnel entrances, if they want it.

and then Leo gets really sick, and is in a lot of pain. Leo's immune system, like everything else about his body, is pretty weak following the armor, and he can't fight off the flu or an infection as well as he could before. so Leo is sick and in pain and Donnie and Mikey remember the cache of healing potions.

(I actually considered writing this fic awhile back and then never did haha, but here's what I had in my notes for it:

Splinter kneels on the side of the bed. "I'm sorry, Blue. We'll get you more medicine soon."

Leo reaches one hand out and Splinter takes it quickly. "Daddy," he whines, tears starting to roll down his cheeks, and oh, Donnie realizes, Leo really is hurting.

He quietly and casually deletes the last ten minutes of audio in his recordings. No one else needs to hear this.)

again, they aren't stupid - they aren't just going to feed Leo some random potions given to them by the guy that hurt him in the first place. but they can go find out if the potions are legit. so time for a trip to Witch Town!

they probably have some kind of misadventure while they're there (I'm imagining Mikey is joining Donnie and April this time), but they do manage to ascertain that the potions are legit. still, they end up getting the same potions made by someone else instead, just in case. but they remember that Draxum did try to help them, that time.

I imagine this happens several times, where Draxum just shows up to help them, they tell him to get lost after, before it starts to sink in that maybe Draxum is actually trying to turn things around. I don't think it ever quite gets to "Mikey calling him their second dad" level, but they do start to accept him as a begrudging ally and eventual weird uncle.

he has to seriously and sincerely apologize to Leo first, though. and Leo doesn't want to forgive him at first, and that's okay. these things take time.

anyway that's all. thanks for the ask again!

[real-fire-emblem-takes]

still on your Birds of Prey thing i have two(ish) things this time around, though feel free to ramble on other details too even if it wasn't specifically asked or mentioned first off, full permission to do an entire infodump on the ocs you have for this so far, i am very curious about all the details you got collected be it details you've mentioned before, changed, or new ones in general, again full permission for you to go nuts secondly, maybe it could be where only certain weapons allow the potential for breaking when used at advantage in the weapon triangle? like you'd have to buy a more expensive and more bulky weapon that has the benefit of being able to break weapons but again is more expensive and probably harder to wield(either just high in weapon rank or just like absurdly heavy to make it hard for the user to double) idk how well it would work, i'm not exactly known for my "making good Fire Emblem gameplay" expertise so take it with a grain of salt (if i ever dabble in fangames maybe i'll get some experience but today is not that day) (also yeah it be me again, i am also realizing i might have a double standard of wanting to hear about people's ocs in this fandom but then worrying that nobody wants to hear about my own, so i might blab on the ocs i have thus far for my au i'm working on sometime (hopefully) soon, heck i could even include some of the unnamed ones since you've even mentioned some unnamed ones yourself and i still think its cool to hear about!)

BIRDS OF PREY CHARACTER STUFF (not updating this post anymore, if you wanna know more then ask about a specific character or wait for the demo)

Read as much or as little as you'd like! There is a LOT so dont feel like you need to read all of it

Gameplay Character

Aelix

The Main Character of the game. Only has Swords at first but also gains access to staves alongside either light or anima when promoting. Her bases are similar to that of a myrmidon but growths are very balanced. Idk abt the personal skill.

At the start of the game shes pretty normal and well adjusted. A little spoiled and naive but thats how most princesses are in media. Anyway, after her dad and brother die in front of her she starts having a bad time and swears revenge on their assassins, The Flock - a group that claims to be bringing power to the people by enacting a revolution against the Hendeyrn Nobility.

After a while, Aelix's need for revenge dwindles and she begins to notice that the commoners are kinda struggling in Hendeyrn, and in a few other supports, learns that Royumec Commoners are also struggling. Also, The Flock is soon revealed to be a ploy for the Royumec Military to invade Hendeyrn to gain more land and resources without suffering proper retaliation.

Route split occurs and Aelix can choose to 1) defend Hendeyrn and carry on her fathers legacy, 2) Switch over to Royumec out of either naivety or apathy, or 3) Go against both kingdoms and create a people focused movement to improve both kingdoms. 3 leads to the most playable characters leaving/being unrecruited and having to be killed in combat while also having the most maps and being noticably harder.

She should be at the club but now shes gotta avenge her father's death an navigate a whole ass war. RIP girl. Also Very Bi with Mary.

Reinhold ???

Your typical Early Game Crutch. A great knight with high HP and Skill, B in Axes and everything else is bad. Hes only good bc he joins in the prologue. Probably benched by chapter 12. Idk about personal skill. Stays on only Defend route. You fight and kill him on the other 2.

Extremely serious and very intent on preserving the King's Legacy, rather than improving the kingdom or supporting Aelix and Lucille through what is quite literally the worst time of their life. Like yeah hes also not coping well but omg hes actively making it worse for the girls. His perception of the King is also so very incomplete as seen in a certain lategame Rev map. Also directly states in several supports that every knight is conditioned to be a disposable tool for the royal family to use :(

Lenore D'Swigen

Early game flier. Highest res in the game, good speed and decent enough magic to use a levin sword later. Low skill but thats partially offset by the accuracy of swords. Kinda low strength tho. Physical bulk is low enough to take large amounts of damage from archers. Safe from shining bows tho. Can also reclass into anima mage and isnt terrible there. No clue about personal skill. Stays on Defend Route, leaves but comes back on Revolution Route, and becomes an Optional Miniboss on Reinhold's Chapter in Betray Route (You only get a Levin Sword for killing your best friend btw)

Childhood friend of Aelix and heiress to a prominent house of Hendeyrn. Energetic but really clumsy. Also is very intelligent. Plays cards with mary in their support while they gossip.

Kester ???

Really solid Lance fighter. High strength, Def, Skl and Hp. Everything else is low. Can promote into spellspear but only has a 5% Magic growth. Go Halberdier instead. Can also reclass into cav. No clue about personal skill. Stays on all 3 routes. Yay!

Extremely formal at all times, only loosens up with Gareth (Drunk), Kaen (Gets bullied by a teenage girl lmao), Henryk (3h style support chain where they state their issues in case you can't figure out the very obvious subtext) and the Revolution Route A support with Aelix (You're fired btw. wanna be friends now?)

Hal ???

Axe Fighter from Chapter 1. Highest Hp in the game, good Strength, Decent Defence and Luck, Okay Spd and Res, Bad Skl and only 5% Magic. No clue about personal Skill or Reclass options. Stays on All 3 routes! :D

Himbo Malewife who's straight up not having a good time knowing he has killed people. Loves cooking and cleaning and all that.

Niall ???

Most Thief Thief to ever Thief. Highest speed in the game, and also good skill. Okay Luck and Res and everything else sucks. Will chip enemies, steal items and be very evasive late game. Stays on Defend and Revolution Routes. Dissappears entirely on Betray Route.

Very Mischievous and loves pranks. Not much to say tbh. Also has a kill quote where he says hes gonna rob the enemy's corpse ig.

Mary Malheur

The early game healer. Joins Chapter 1 and is always available. C Staves and D Brawling. Has very solid mixed bulk that will only continue to get better, Good Strength and decent Luck. Middling Speed and Skill don't really matter when using an accurate and brave weapon type. Her base magic is enough for early game and you won't start feeling her low growth until midgame.

On top of all that, because she is technically a brawler, meaning she has access to Combat Arts. At Lvl10 unpromoted, she gains access to Defiant Dragon Art, which boosts her Def/Res/Luck by a decent amount until the beginning of next turn (and has a cool interaction with one of her promoted abilities). Upon promotion to War Monk, she gains the Solar Strike art, which restores health. At Max Level, she gains Phoenix Flight art. This is unlimited galeforce for just 12 hp. Like yeah she only gets 1 punch in and will probably be taking additional damage from counterattacks, but even then this is really amazing bc she can use her full 6 movement multiple times a turn.

But if you don't care about all that you can just reclass to wyvern instead.

Indecisive. Sleepy. Likes games. Has several supports that explore the pressure of the expectations placed on her because of her intelligence and potential. Also mentions that healing staves will just prolong and make the death much more excruciating when used on a nearly dead person without explaining where she got that knowledge from in her support with Harsent.

Thank you Mary for keeping the army together throughout the early game Aelix couldn't have done it without u. the midgame probably also. I wish you 2 the best on your wedding <33333333333333

Jaspar ???

The most armoured armour to ever armour. Highest Def in the game, high HP and Strength, Solid Skill and Luck, Terrible Speed and Res. Can also reclass into Archer for some reason. Recruited Chapter 2, Stays on Defend Route, but is an optional miniboss on both Revolution and Betray route. Technically can be rerecruited on rev route but its really hard.

Training obsessed bisexual weirdo(affectionate). Wants to be a really good Knight and be as helpful as possible. Really bad at dealing with the fact that everything will change and nothing is permanent.

Harsent ???

Cavalier. Very balanced stats. So balanced that her growths are somehow within 5% of the average for everything except magic. I didn't even plan this im just as surprised as you are lmao. Can also reclass into Sword Fighter. Stays on Defend Route, can be easily rerecruited on Rev and is an optional miniboss on Betray Route.

Very dedicated to being a knight. Several of her voice lines would imply that she would simply sacrifice herself if Aelix asked. which is. concerning.... Like 70% of the cast needs therapy tbh :(

Ricon ???

Early Mage. Amazing Magic and Res, Good skill, Decent Hp and speed, high base strength but hes a mage and has a low strength growth, also terrible defence and luck. Can reclass into archer (Shining Bow Niche 👀👀👀). Available throughout all 3 routes.

Loves Researching magic and teaching stuff to others. Very intelligent. Overuses magic for mundane things. Sir, a wind spell is gonna blow the clothes away before they dry. Likes sweets and is just a lovable dork who happens to look really intimidating.

Fletcher Holz

Early archer. High strength, speed and skill, low res and everything else is mid. Can reclass into Axe Fighter. Available throughout all 3 routes.

Just some guy tbh. Likes meat. Decent Chef. also hes transmasc.

Gareth ???

Brawler. High health, Decent Defence and everything else is mid. Combat arts include Beastslaying Art (effective against monsters) and Full Force Art (Extremely high might). Also gains Five Star Strike (Astra for 12 HP) at max level. Can reclass into Cavalier. Available for all 3 routes.

Massive Flirt. Takes very little seriously. Accidentally ends up acting like a father to Kaen and Niall.

Alastor von Belleau

This bitch. This asshole. Joins in chapter 4 as a Lvl 5 Troubadour. C Staves and E Rank Anima. Much faster than Ricon but also has lower magic and Anima rank so typically you'll only be seeing 5×2 in combat forecast and cant use any funky spells for a while. Substantially squisher than Mary but has a horse. Personal skill gives 20% extra exp gain to adjacent allies. Suspiciously dissappears a few chapters before route split.

This Royumec Noble enjoys baking and having tea and reading and going on walks and taking care of his horse and is great at taking care of others.

"Oh he sounds nice and helpful" Oh you fool. Thats what he wants you to think. The Royumec Nobility has created The Flock and assassinated Thades and The King. And this bitch is one of them. On the route split, it is straight up revealed that he was a part of the plan and acted as a spy. This asshole then tries to manipulate Aelix into betraying her kingdom.

"We were trying to improve the live of your citizens" (Lie, you were fighting for land and resources), "We actively chose to spare you"(Lie, why were your soldiers attacking Aelix and Co during Chapters 2, 3 and 4), "and your sister" (Ommission of information, you thought that the 16 year old would be easy to manipulate or intimidate into doing what you want), "You trust me, right? We're friends" (Half Lie, Aelix may have seen you as a friend but you certainly didn't see her as one), etc.

Obviously, on Betray Route, he is with you for the rest of the game; However, he actually joins you later on in the other 2 routes because he doesn't want to die (okay thats fair). Joins as a Strategist and can reclass into Trickster or Assassin. Has Great Magic, Res and Speed alongside decent Skill and Luck but terrible HP and Def. 7 personal strength is less terrible than you'd expect but you'll still usually see single digit damage when reclassing him to Assassin or Trickster.

Kaen Karamela

Your second axe fighter. Joins in chapter 5 and is available in all 3 routes. Highest Strength in the game, Good HP, Spd, Skill and Luck, Low Def and Res. Personal skill grants +1 Crit per HP below max. Can also reclass into Lance fighter to grab Vantage.

Kaen is the obligatory minor who really should not be fighting. Girl loves partying and also bullying grown ass men. Her 18th birthday will be a few days after one of the final chapters to specifically have her joke that she has fought in and ended a war before being able to drink alcohol. Canonically Lesbian.

Sarre ???

Early Sword Fighter. Joins Chapter 6 and stays on all 3 routes. Amazing Speed and Great Skill but Underwhelming strength and terrible luck. Can reclass into Axe Fighter.

Not having a great time after her husband left her. Is now in debt bc of his gambling and is trying to pay it off with mercenary work. Left her son at his grandparents so they can raise him while she works. has an arc that changes her for the better. idk how to explain it tho.

Isake ???

Early Light mage. Joins chapter 6 and stays on all routes. Great Defence and magic, Good Hp, Res and Luck, but low speed. Being a Light Mage, Isake gains access to various defensive spells such as Def/Res improving spells, Critical prevention, Draining magic and follow-up prevention. Can reclass into Anima Mage.

Very wise, Kind to all, Patient, Loves giving gifts, very perceptive, etc. Enjoys reading and bird watching.

Klara Varela

A midgame Dark Knight. Only available on Rev route. Only 5% strength and Magic growths but has great bases in those. Best Skl in the game, High speed, everything else is decent. Personal skill grants 1 stack of advantage to Klara if enemy can't counter. This also applies to Dark Magic summons and synergises well with seige tomes. Can reclass into Sorcerer, Halberdier and Spellspear.

Probably has the stongest endgame build (Chaos Style+Vantage+Luna+Ignis+Quixotic as a Spellspear) Ignis and Luna can activate on the same atk btw. High Skill + Personal + Chaos Style + Quixotic leads to her having activation rates in the 70-90% range. Vantage singlehandedly enables this build to work on enemy phase too. Enjoy seeing 50s most hits :). I think plus sized women should be allowed to be op.

(Community mage almost has this build but cant pull it off very well bc no Vantage, lower skill, probably no helpful personal skill for this build, much lower strength and Bulk too low to reliably take multiple hits in case of failure. Sorry!)

Everyone else is in a generally serious war game with political intrigue. Klara is in a comedy. She is a trickster who is constantly playing pranks on people and annoying most by being so deeply unserious. Extremely confident and knows her worth. Has exactly one serious conversation.

Runs the secret shop in all 3 routes but it doesn't have energy drops or spirit dusts because she eated them all. Also straight up drags a guy from the enemy army to fight for you against his will and treats him like her new bestie and drags him everywhere. He hates it. Queen. Love her. Hope she never stops. Tranfem, Aro and Ace.

Adam

Mid game Def and Rev route Wyvern Lord. High Strength, Hp and Def, Decent Skl, Low Res and Luck. Personal skill is a 20% heal after defeating an enemy.

A mercenary hired by Rosahel to help in the war effort. Loves murder a not normal amount. Also the guy that Klara forces into joining your side. That's about it.

Anna von Ernest

Only available in Betray Route. Still has Make a Killing. idk anything else.

You know her.

Henryk ???

This guy is so crazy. Joins in a late paralogue as a Trickster. Extremely Underwhelming stats for a late game unit: Lower strength and magic compared to other units, Middling mixed bulk, Skill and Luck. Only has good speed and Great weapon ranks (A staves, A Daggers). Like a thief but less extreme. Can also reclass into Assassin, Sorcerer and Dark Knight

"So the crazy thing about him is that hes a bad endgame unit who has warp and rescue access" Wrong! His personal skill, Unmask, is the crazy thing about him. He gains 2 stacks of advantage (+15 hit, 10% skill activation, 5 crit and 2 damage dealt per stack) while inflicting enemies with 2 stacks of disadvantage (advantage but reversed) if there are no b support or below allies within 3 spaces. King hides 4 Str/Mag/Def/Res and 10 Spd/Skl/Luck from everyone lmao. Already has an a rank with Thades :)

As i said in the last long FE:BoP post, Henryk managed to raise Thades from the dead somehow. The process was expensive and time intensive as it used dark magic, healing staves, advanced Royumec technology and surgical precision. At first, the dark magic was thought to have taken away some of Thades' agency and given Henryk a substantial amount of control over him and altered his memories, but that was soon discovered to be false.

Henryk likes to appear as unhelpful and incapable as possible to get out of doing work, but is completely fine with putting in effort for those close to him. He enjoys architecture and gardening and in all of his endings, he ends up being a famous architect.

Thades

Joins in a late game Rev route paralogue alongside Henryk. Same Class as Aelix and Lucille. Compared to Aelix, he has much higher Def and Skl and slightly more strength at the cost of much lower Res and Luck and Slightly less speed. Similar Magic and HP. No clue about personal skill. Can reclass into Falcon Knight.

So Unbelievably gay with Henryk. Very emotionally closed off. Hilarious how technically having their father die made him and Aelix get their partners. Anyway, his support with Aelix reveals that they never felt that close to each other bc he was always busy learning how to run things as crown prince while Aelix and Lucille were doted upon and constantly praised by their father.

In the final(?) Rev Route map, Thades has boss dialogue with The King (he came back) where he asks The King if he remembers a simple memory from when Thades was a child. The King says yes, but Thades reveals that the event went completely differently and figures out that The King hasn't been revived like him but instead is The S Rank Dark Magic being used to create a copy of one of noble's perception of him.

In both his Endings, he helps out with managing the restructured nations.

Ill talk about everyone else in later i had to rush this out for today lmao

also feel free to ask more questions, tell me your overall thoughts or even talk about your headcanons for the characters or how you imagine they look

Anyway time for question 2's answer: I figured that break maybe should only be for units with breaker skills (Halberdiers w/ Swordbreaker, Lightbearers w/ Shadowbreaker, etc)

To Do: Summer, Silvester, Yvette, Manon, Jed, Lex, Rosahel, Valstyr, Lucille, The King, Nikita, Siobhan, more characters when i think of them

[annbourbon]

🖤 ✨ 🖤 ✨ Rika ✨ 🖤 ✨ 🖤

Let's start with Rika...

⚠️possible spoilers ahead, be warned⚠️

I can't believe I actually didn't realize that. I mean, I did it. Like 7 years ago, but I had no clue on how to explain it.

Besides it needs from Mystic Messenger Timeline *which I'm still working on, and trying to finish* to actually make sense.

Disclaimer: Please take into account that whatever I say here, it's only my opinion after playing the game so many years. I'm not a psychiatrist or a psychologist, or therapist of any kind. I'm just a writer, who loves to spend time analysing characters and stories.

I did asked to my mom to help me with this and the other characters because of how difficult the task ahead of me was. My mom, who is an actual therapist, did her best to help me, but I did most of the analysis here, since I'm the one who knows the in's and outs of this game. Besides, I did my research and I'll make sure to quote it! So give it a chance and keep reading even if you disagree with me. And then, I'd love to read your thoughts on the topic 💕

Narcissus. Also known as daffodil.

Should I talk to you about the dark side of the flowers and tie it to MM characters?? Anyways, Rika is a narcissistic. But also has a profound trauma. One doesn't exclude the other. Here's a quote from Mayo Clinic:

«Narcissistic personality disorder is a mental health condition in which people have an unreasonably high sense of their own importance. They need and seek too much attention and want people to admire them. People with this disorder may lack the ability to understand or care about the feelings of others. But behind this mask of extreme confidence, they are not sure of their self-worth and are easily upset by the slightest criticism.»

Causes: The cause is likely complex. Narcissistic personality disorder may be linked to:

Environment — parent-child relationships with either too much adoration or too much criticism that don't match the child's actual experiences and achievements.

There are other two, that are genetic, and neurobiology causes, but I'll be focusing more on the environment, which let's be honest, it's what is displayed on the game. If you're interested on reading more about it, there's a link before the quote and, on References, I'll also be leaving every single link.

So let's go back to Rika and please read the next three images while remembering how's her relationship with V, and Saeran. Sometimes even with MC, and Mika.

As you can see...

Attention:

* Creates the RFA. Receives attention.

* Creates Mint Eye. Receives attention.

* Says V is her Sun.

* As soon as she gets tired, says V's killing her and wants to leave

* Wants to mix RFA and Mint Eye. I assume is because despite everything, she feels like she's losing attention on everything she created. And MC is the reason of that too.

They don't choose losers:

V is a millionaire

Jumin is a millionaire

Zen is super sexy and hot

Jaehee and the twins are really smart

Do I need to keep going? Even Elizabeth the 3rd is one of the most beautiful cats ever seen.

Grooming:

Here's the part that keeps bothering me because I realized about it before I could actually explain what it was going on. Seven years ago I decided to play the game, and I finished feeling a bit too weird on how everyone was so infatuated with Rika... it wasn't any other person that just dies and then the group dies too. It was still active two years after losing her (?) Even though they have only know each other for... 4 to 6 years?

Some even less. Like Jaehee. Which randomly brings me to: She's an ENFJ so she does focus on details like Jaehee (Jaehee might be ISFJ, ISTJ or even ESFJ considering how well she manages around people too. But that's another story.) Her enneagram is probably 1.

I can understand Yoosung, but... you know what I mean. It was weird. And once I reached the first VN novel about V and Rika I felt even more weirded out by these two.

I don't think I can pinpoint it but I felt like Rika was manipulating V so I was surprised when I realized some members were tying these two as lovers and a beautiful couple. Do you guys remember V being surprised by Rika quoting "The Sun is the mother of all"?? Yeah... Even back then, for me it was a highlight of how messed up their relationship was. But again, I couldn't exactly pinpoint it. Until, now.

After Cheritz released Another Story, and Rika DLC, many of my theories came true. But still in a disorganized way. Which is why I created The Mystic Messenger Timeline.

I did confirmed one thing:

Rika is a narcissist and V is a people pleaser (that doesn't make him any less villainous of what he is, but I'll explain once we'll reach his profile. I promise.) at least at the very beginning of this story.

She probably has psychopatic tendencies

She definitely has sadistic and abusive tendencies: I have a hard time putting through her whole behavior during Saeran's Route and especially during his AE. But she takes pleasure in hurting others. V, Saeran, MC, Mint Eye associates, etc.

A bit of One on the Enneagram:

It is called The Reformer.

Because Ones have a “sense of mission” that leads them to want to improve the world in various ways, using whatever degree of influence they have. They strive to overcome adversity—particularly moral adversity—so that the human spirit can shine through and make a difference. They strive after “higher values,” even at the cost of great personal sacrifice.

If you think I'm too far off, then please check the levels of healthy and unhealthy Ones can have. They sure ring a bit too much for me on Rika's behavior. From Level 1 to 9, we can see her evolution during the game. But here you have a couple of her worse traits.

Unhealthy Levels

Level 7: Can be highly dogmatic, self-righteous, intolerant, and inflexible. Begin dealing in absolutes: they alone know "The Truth." Everyone else is wrong: very severe in judgments, while rationalizing own actions.

Level 8: Become obsessive about imperfection and the wrongdoing of others, although they may fall into contradictory actions, hypocritically doing the opposite of what they preach.

Level 9: Become condemnatory toward others, punitive and cruel to rid themselves of wrongdoers. Severe depressions, nervous breakdowns, and suicide attempts are likely. Generally corresponds to the Obsessive-Compulsive and Depressive personality disorders

If you want to know more about this, check this.

So, why do you (player) like Rika as character?

Because it's okay, I know people who actually like Rika. I don't, but I definitely don't hate her either...

You don't need to be worried about it as long as you know what she did was wrong. That's it. Now, why do you like her/identify with her?

Things that might, or not, ring a bell:

* Trauma: Rika has a traumatic past. And you might feel like it's a mirror of your past. Hence identifying with it might not be something difficult. Of course this doesn't mean you are leader of some religious cult.

* Her willingness to fight despite having everything at odds. Let's not forget that before she goes nuts and starts brainwashing people, she did a lot of great deeds. Tried to stay positive and all that.

* Her kindness (we can discuss over certain things, but as much as she did terrible things, she also did amazing things, like creating the RFA to help people. Wether she did it with a certain master plan in mind or not, she did helped as much as she hurt and that's the important part.)

* She's just a great villain! It might be hard to understand for some people but you actually just look at her character as what it is, a character, and you're impressed by how many discussions and hot debates she brings onto the table. Understandable!

* Her flower means forgiveness♡

Do you have any other ideas for why you might like Rika? I'd be happy to read them. 💕

Also, this might be one of my last post about her. Might not be the last but I do need to finish with the Mystic Messenger Timeline, and I will but I don't think I have a lot more material to write about. So thank you for sticking with me all this time! I'm linking the main post on MysMe theories I have, I still need to finish tying up all nicely. But we're coming to the end. I'm definitely talking about trauma, coping mechanisms, parenthood, childhood and societal pressures but it'll be in other posts, possibly not even linking them to this one. Who knows? Stay tuned~!

References:

Mayo Clinic - Narcissistic Disorder Personality

Between Narcissistic & People pleaser

Medium - Beware a narcissist with a hero complex

Paired Life - Hero & Narcissist

Enneagram Institute - One

[chicgeekgirl89]

Summary: A nightmarish White Elephant gift haunts Carlos for the entire holiday season. Rating: M (no sex, but like...heavy on the implied) A/N: Is this a Christmas fic? Yes. Is it now January? Also yes. But Christmas is a feeling you can have anytime! Read on AO3

“Noooo!!!” 

There’s a collective shout of protest from the entire group as Mateo snatches a mug full of handmade chocolate from Paul and returns smugly to his seat on Owen’s sofa. “I got it for you boo,” he says, smiling up at Nancy with such a lovesick expression that it prompts another groan from everyone.

“Cap that’s not fair! People shouldn’t be allowed to steal gifts for other people!” Marjan protests. 

“You’re just mad because now Paul’s gonna steal your bath bombs!” Mateo tells her, not looking the least bit sorry.

“Yep,” Paul says, hopping up and plucking the bag of bath bombs from her lap.

“Cap!” Marjan protests again, trying to grab it back and failing.

“There is nothing in the rules that says you can’t steal a gift with the intention of giving it away once the game is complete,” Owen says calmly.

“Is there anything that says how unfair it is that the couples get to take home two gifts?” Marjan grumbles, crossing her arms and sinking back into her chair petulantly.

“Maybe you should bring a boyfriend next time then,” Mateo shoots back.

“Okay enough children,” Tommy says calmly from where she’s sitting next to Judd and Grace. “Marjan you get to either steal or pick a new gift.”

“Fine,” she huffs and rolls her eyes. “I will take a new gift.”

Owen’s annual White Elephant party has been in full swing for a couple hours. The food and drinks have been flowing all night and they are deep into their gift exchange. Tommy holds a gift certificate for a local movie theater, Carlos stole a set of ornaments from Nancy two rounds ago, Judd has managed to wrangle a set of freezable beer glasses back after three steals, and Grace has threatened bodily harm to anyone who tries to take the gift card for a pedicure that she unwrapped to start the game. 

It’s been a night full of laughter and holiday spirit, much needed after the last few months. T.K. is snuggled into Carlos’ side, his eyes full of light and happiness. The relief Carlos feels at seeing him enjoy this time with friends and family is palpable. 

“Fine,” Marjan says, putting on that air that says she’s “rising above” even though she’s likely still harboring bitterness inside. “I will choose a new gift.”

She opens a gift bag with snowflakes on it to reveal a “Grow Your Own Avocado Kit” that mollifies her. “Okay Tommy, you’re up,” T.K. says. “Are you stealing or opening?”

“I think I will open,” Tommy says, reaching for a flat-ish gift that’s wrapped in the standard Amazon gift wrap. “I like an element of surprise.”

She puts on a face of fake contemplation and shakes it lightly. “Hope it’s not breakable,” Judd teases. 

“Doesn’t sound like it,” she says, pulling the packaging off. 

She and Grace both realize what it is at the same time and their eyes go comically wide. “Oh…my,” Tommy says as Grace clears her throat and shifts a little, clear amusement on her face.

“What is it Tommy?” Nancy asks, craning her neck to try and see.

“It is um,” Tommy turns it around for everyone to see, “an adult advent calendar.”

For a long moment the only sound in the room is Michael Bublé crooning on about white Christmases and sleigh bells. And in that moment, Carlos should realize that he’s doomed. But he’s too relaxed and full of holiday cheer to realize his fate has been sealed. So instead he sits there in blissful ignorance and doesn’t realize that his fiancé, cuddled sweetly in beside him, is already plotting a course of action that is going to ruin his holiday season.

“Well,” Owen says finally, “that is…an interesting choice. Who um, who decided to bring that gift?”

“It was me!” Mateo says proudly. “My buddy got one last year and said it was awesome. He and his girlfriend really enjoyed doing the activities.”

Carlos winces. Poor Mateo. The kid really doesn’t get it sometimes. 

“Babe,” Nancy says patiently. “What do you think an adult advent calendar is for?”

“I don’t know,” Mateo says, obviously confused by everyone’s reactions. “Like drinking wine and stuff? Things for adults.”

“Mateo, can you really not think of another meaning for the word ‘adult’?” Judd asks.

He wrinkles his forehead in confusion and then it clears, his mouth forming an “o” shape. “Oooooh, adult like…ADULT.”

“There it is,” Paul says with a nod.

Marjan leans over Tommy’s shoulder. “Twenty-four naughty challenges for every fast day,” she reads aloud. “Every fast day? What the hell does that even mean?”

“I think it means this came from a country where English isn’t the primary language,” Grace says in amusement.

“Oh god, Tommy, I’m so sorry!” Mateo says, looking horrified.

“It’s okay, it’s okay,” Tommy says with a laugh. “I don’t think I’ll be getting much use out of this as a single person, but it’s the thought that counts, right?”

The group gets a good laugh at Mateo’s expense and the game moves on. Owen opens a gigantic Hershey bar and immediately goes on a rant about how sugar is a metabolism killer before trying to foist it off on Judd to give to Charlie, and then Marjan steals Grace’s gift card and all hell breaks loose for about ten minutes as vicious gameplay ensues. Carlos loses his ornaments and ends up with the Hershey bar, which, if nothing else, will make his nieces and nephews happy, so it’s not too big of a loss. 

When the dust settles everyone is left with a gift except for T.K. “What’s it going to be T.K.?” Judd asks. “Are you taking the last gift or choosing to restart the violence?”

T.K. looks up at Carlos, a wicked smile on his face and Carlos’ stomach lurches. “Please don’t,” he says.

“Don’t what babe?” T.K. asks innocently.

“You know what,” Carlos says, a cold sweat breaking out on the back of his neck. 

Because somehow, in all the chaos, Tommy still has the sexy advent calendar. Apparently no one else is interested in “naughty challenges for every fast day.” But T.K. is always up for naughty challenges. And embarrassing the shit out of Carlos. 

“What are you two whispering about?” Nancy asks suspiciously. “Are you crafting some master plan for stealing these bath bombs? Because you can pry them from my cold dead hands.”

“Relax. I don’t want your bath bombs Nance,” T.K. says in that voice he uses when he’s about to ruin Carlos’ life. It’s the one that’s obnoxiously casual with hints of mischief and delight and it sends fear shooting through him like nothing else.

“Okay well we don’t got until New Year’s, pick a gift T.K.!” Judd says.

“If you insist.” T.K. stands and walks toward Paul only to do an abrupt about face and grab the advent calendar from Tommy instead. “I think we can probably find a way to have some fun with this at our place.”

Carlos dies. He literally dies. He can feel his face going fire engine red. He wishes he could sink into the couch and disappear. He knows T.K. is sex positive. He knows that that entire 126 is far more aware of the intimate details of their bedroom life than he would like. He knows. But rarely does he have to see it flaunted so blatantly in front of his face. In front of his soon to be father-in-law’s face. 

Right now Carlos is also sex positive in that he’s positive they’re never having sex again.

T.K. plops back down next to him and opens it up to a random page. “Ooh look at Day Eighteen babe!”

“I wanna see Day Eighteen!” Mateo comes running and leans over Carlos’ lap to take a look. 

“Don’t look at Day Eighteen, skip right to the end,” Nancy says, snatching it from T.K.’s hands and riffling through the pages. “Game in Santa? Is that like a threesome? Do you have to hire a Santa actor? That feels like something that should have been booked months in advance.”

“Santa actors are indeed very busy this time of year,” Owen says. “And I’d imagine a Santa willing to participate in a threesome is going to be much more expensive than your standard mall Santa.”

Carlos slumps lower in the couch and covers his face with his hands. This is a nightmare.

Carlos is on shift the next day when his phone buzzes with a text message. He and Lexi are on desk duty, working on end of year paperwork. Other people might be unhappy about it, but as much as Carlos enjoys the more active aspects of his job he also finds paperwork soothing. It’s like putting things to bed and tying it all up in a neat little bow. 

Lexi does not agree.

“Whyyyyyy are there so many forms?” she moans, dropping her head dramatically onto her desk, dangerously close to her coffee cup.

Carlos automatically reaches over and moves it to safety. “You’re going to have to do them all over again if you spill coffee on everything.”

“No I won’t. I’ll just send them in covered in coffee stains. That’s admin’s problem.”

“Your desire for perfection is admirable,” Carlos teases her, picking up his phone to find T.K. has sent a picture of their sock drawer. Everything is neatly aligned and perfectly in place, just the way he likes.

Thanks for doing the laundry babe, he texts back. 

Three little dots pop up immediately followed shortly by a second picture, this time of their spice cabinet. Carlos frowns in concentration and zooms in a little bit. “Did he refill all the spices?” he asks under his breath.

“What was that?” Lexi asks, clearly eager to be distracted from her work.

“T.K.’s home today and he’s sending me pictures of his chores,” Carlos says, showing it to her before typing back, Busy day huh? Thanks.

Their sergeant calls them in for an impromptu meeting after that and Carlos doesn’t get to look at his phone again until lunchtime. A third picture greets him, this time of their vacuum, lines apparent on the carpet where T.K. has done some vacuuming. Carlos chuckles to himself, amused by his boyfriend’s antics. Thank you? he responds. What’s with all the extra chores today?

He knows something’s up when T.K. begins responding immediately. Even through the phone he can sense T.K.’s eagerness and glee. Whatever’s going on, T.K. is very proud of himself and probably about to make Carlos just a little crazy.

It’s Day Seven.

Carlos stares at the text, his mind drawing a blank. Day seven of what? December? What does that mean?

He texts T.K. back asking as much and receives yet another picture in reply. Carlos has to bite back an incredulous laugh when he realizes it’s a page from that stupid advent calendar telling them to send suggestive texts to each other throughout the day.

This is your version of sexting? he types out, trying not to smile too obviously. The spice cabinet and the vacuum? Very hot.

The reply comes immediately. No, it’s your version of sexting. This is my version of sexting.

The dots disappear for just long enough that Carlos gets distracted by a couple forms that need his signature. When he absentmindedly checks his phone again a few minutes later his jaw drops.

T.K. has sent a selfie of himself in front of their bathroom mirror. His shirt is unbuttoned, chest fully exposed, his belt and the button on his pants undone so they’re slung low on his hips with the waistband of his boxers peeking out tantalizingly over the top. And his face, god his face. Most of the time T.K. looks like a giddy little boy. But with his head tipped back, eyes half closed, mouth slightly open, god, he looks like… 

Fuck.

“Carlos? You okay?” Lexi asks, bringing Carlos crashing back into the present and his current location.

He shifts a little and immediately turns his phone screen off. “Yeah, just um, just need a break I think.”

She nods. “See? Told you. All this paperwork is bad for you.”

“Yeah,” he says, clearing his throat, heat still pooling in his midsection. “I’ll be back in a minute.”

“Don’t rush. The paper’s not going anywhere,” she says.

He slips into the locker room, checking to make sure no one is around before locking himself in one of the bathroom stalls. He taps T.K.’s name and it takes only one ring before his boyfriend is picking up. “Hey baby.”

“Jesus Christ T.K.,” Carlos says. “I’m at work.”

“I’m aware.” T.K.’s voice is full of delight. 

“You’re going to kill me,” Carlos says, letting his head fall back against the cool metal of the stall wall.

“Mmm might you be a fan of the advent calendar after all?” 

Carlos huffs. “No. I have,” he checks his watch, “four more hours before I can get home to you. I very much do not like the advent calendar right now.”

“Four hours huh?” T.K. says. “I can send a lot of sexy text messages in four hours…”

“T.K. I swear to god, do not keep sending me stuff here. I’m going to turn my phone off.”

It buzzes as he speaks and he pulls it away from his ear to see yet another text message. “Just one to remember me by then,” T.K. says, his voice flirty. “I’ll see you when you get home.”

And then he’s gone, leaving Carlos alone and turned on as hell. He sucks in a breath and tries to give himself a stern talking to about professionalism and decency.

It barely works. 

He equal parts wants to worship T.K. and murder him.

He can’t help himself. He opens the last text. Couldn’t resist, it reads and then there’s a picture of T.K. in nothing but his boxers, lip caught between his teeth, his free hand so suggestively placed that Carlos considers faking sick and rushing home as fast as he can.

Instead he hardens his resolve. Two can play at this game. 

He flicks through the pictures on his phone, settling on a selfie he took a couple weeks ago. He’d really been feeling himself after a heavy lifting session and snapped it in the gym bathroom. His shirt is pulled up between his teeth, his curls messy and sweaty in a way he knows T.K. thinks is sexy as hell. You can just make out the faint outline of a bulge in his shorts. 

Carlos smirks as he sends it, then turns his phone off without waiting for a reply. He has to make it through the rest of the day and that’s not going to happen if T.K. keeps texting.

When his shift is over he stops at the grocery store to grab more cheese and a salad to go along with the pasta they’re having for dinner. He gets home a little after six, his mouth watering at the smells of tomato and garlic that are swirling from their loft out into the hallway. “Hi!” he calls as he steps inside and slips off his shoes.

“Hi.” T.K. steps out of the kitchen, an apron over his clothes and an amused smile on his face as he gives Carlos a welcome home kiss.

Carlos rolls his eyes. “Dinner smells good.”

“Should be ready in a few minutes.” T.K. watches as he sets down his work bag and starts looking through the mail that’s on their console table. “Have you checked your phone lately?”

“I turned it off,” Carlos tells him. “You were extremely distracting and I didn’t think I could make it through the rest of my shift if you kept texting.”

T.K. takes a step closer, false casualness coloring his voice. “You might want to take a look.”

Carlos sets the mail down. “If I look at more dirty pictures of you now we’ll never eat dinner. And I’m starving.”

“I think my dirty pictures are the least of your worries,” T.K. says, glee lighting up in his eyes. “Your picture on the other hand…”

Carlos smiles as he pulls his phone out and powers it back up. “Oh you liked that huh?”

“I definitely liked it. And so did everyone else.”

“Everyone else? What are you talking abo—“ Carlos’ eyes go wide as forty-six missed messages pop up onto his screen. The most recent one is from Judd, and when he opens the text thread he finds that—

“Yeah, you sent your revenge thirst trap to the 126 group chat babe,” T.K. tells him.

Horror fills Carlos from top to bottom as he scrolls through the messages.

“Whoa, what is this, Thirst Trap Thursday?”- Paul

“Dang, do you lift bro?”- Mateo

“Oh Carlos, sweetie, I think you sent this to the wrong person.” -Tommy

“Okay Officer Hottie!”- Nancy

They go on and on, everyone chiming in at one point or another, including Owen, who offers to hook Carlos up with his supplement regimen the next time they’re at the house and culminating in a text from Judd asking everyone to stop forking texting, his phone hasn’t stopped buzzing for an hour.

Carlos has never been more mortified in his entire life. “Oh my god,” he says.

“Deep breaths. You’re okay,” T.K. says, patting him gently on the back.

Carlos pulls back and glares at him. “This is your fault!”

“Pretty sure I didn’t send my sexy pics to the wrong group thread. How is it my fault?”

“You and that stupid advent calendar! This never would have happened if you’d just let Tommy keep it!”

“It’s one picture Carlos. Everyone will have forgotten about it by tomorrow.”

(No one forgets. They bring it up all the time. They blow it up to poster size and hang it in T.K.’s locker at work. They send a graffitied version of it to Carlos on his birthday. The following year’s white elephant exchange includes a copy in a garish frame.)

Carlos crosses his arms over his chest. “We’re getting rid of it.”

T.K. snorts. “No we’re not.”

“Yes we are!”

“It’s my gift! You can’t throw away a gift!”

Carlos clenches his jaw. “That thing is trouble T.K. I don’t want it around anymore.”

T.K. steps closer. “That’s funny. Because usually you like it when I get into trouble.”

“Do not start with that.”

“Come on baby,” T.K. says, his tone flirty and suggestive. “We were having a pretty good time with it before all this.” He runs a finger along the buttons on Carlos’ shirt. “I thought that picture was hot. And I like that everyone knows this beautiful body is all mine.”

God help him, something inside of him unspools when T.K. talks like this. “Your dad saw it. And Tommy,” he protests, the embarrassment lingering.

“Tommy sees bodies all the time at work,” T.K. says. “And my dad really doesn’t care. Honestly it’s kind of surprising he didn’t send a selfie back.” He looks up at Carlos through his lashes. “Let’s have dinner and then I’ll make you forget about anything except how hot we both are, okay?”

He must be the weakest man alive. “Okay,” he says. “But you have to promise me that that stupid calendar will stay between us from now on.”

“I promise,” T.K. says, patting his chest. “Only the two of us will know anything about it.”

“Good,” Carlos says in relief.

A couple weeks later Carlos comes home from Christmas shopping, struggling to find his keys as he exits the elevator with an armload of bags full of gifts for his family and T.K. He’s so focused on trying to extract his keys from his pocket without dropping anything that he doesn’t notice their front door is slightly ajar until he’s reaching toward the lock. 

He immediately goes on high alert. T.K. had texted he was on his way home five minutes ago. There’s no way he could have gotten here so fast. And even if he had, there’s no way he would have left the door ajar.

Carlos carefully sets down his bags and pulls out his phone as he eases the door open a little further, peering carefully inside. There’s music blasting and the smell of cookies in the air. Are they being robbed by the Keebler elves?

He ventures in a little further, body tense and ready for a fight, when out of nowhere there’s a blood curdling scream and he has to duck as a mixing bowl comes flying at his head. “Whoa!” he yells as it crashes to the floor behind him, splattering something all over their entryway.

“Carlos?! What the fuck?!”

He looks up to find his sister staring at him. “Cesca! Oh my god!”

“You scared the shit out of me!” she yells angrily.

“You scared the shit out of ME!” he yells back, rubbing his chest where his heart is still thundering away.

“Why is everyone yelling?" Adriana appears from the bedroom looking confused and mildly annoyed, giving him his second heart attack of the last three minutes. 

“Why are you both in my house?!” he asks incredulously. 

“We’re baking cookies,” Francesca says, as if this is totally normal and acceptable.

“Don’t you have an oven at your place?” Carlos asks.

“It’s broken,” Adriana tells him, as she walks around the couch and then spots the mess the mixing bowl left on the floor. “Cesca, what the fuck? We’re going to have to make the icing all over again.”

“He broke in and scared me! I had to defend myself!”

“I didn’t break in, this is my house!” Carlos says. “And you left the door open!”

“Sorry you have a weird ass bougie slidey door that’s difficult to close,” Cesca mumbles with a roll of her eyes as she returns to the kitchen.

His heart finally returning to normal, Carlos steps outside and retrieves his bags and then firmly closes and locks the door behind him. He’d prefer if his cousin and sister were on the other side, but getting rid of them is harder than getting rid of Christmas card glitter. He’s just going to have to accept their presence in his home until they get tired or bored and leave. 

“Why didn’t you just go to Mom and Dad’s?” Carlos steps around the sticky mess on the floor to deposit his purchases on the couch before going in search of a towel to clean it up.

“We did,” Adriana says. “Your mom kicked us out.”

Carlos picks up the mixing bowl and swipes a finger along the icing inside, popping it in his mouth as he heads toward the kitchen sink. “Why would she kick you out for baking cookies?”

His eyes land on the kitchen counter and he stops dead in his tracks. Every square inch is covered in gingerbread people, some of them already decorated, some of them still plain brown. But decorated or not, one thing is very, VERY clear. Every. single. one. is having sex.

“Tía Andrea claimed it was pornographic,” Adriana says, picking up a piping bag to add some details to a pair that are doing it doggy style. 

Carlos feels like he’s having an out of body experience. His sister and cousin have always pushed the envelope of decency a little bit, but this is another level entirely. And he’s completely trapped. If he expresses dismay they’ll call him a prude. If he says nothing, he risks this happening again. 

“We call it The Caramel Sutra,” Francesca tells him. “It’s for our Christmas party.”

“You and T.K. are invited, by the way,” Adriana says. “It’s on Friday.”

“I think we’re busy,” Carlos says, his voice strained. Does he yell? Does he run? Does he go in the bedroom and shut the door until they leave? 

“Oh my god, not you too,” Francesca says with a roll of her eyes. “That’s the same look Mom had on her face right before she started yelling at us to get our smutty cookies out of her kitchen.”

“I mean, they’re pretty…aggressive,” Carlos says.

“They’re just cookies,” Adriana says. “Don’t stand there and pretend like you’re some kind of prude. We know what you and T.K. get up to around here.”

She picks up something off the counter and waves it at him. Hot dread spikes through him as he recognizes the god damn Sexy Advent Calendar. “Where did you get that?” he asks.

“It was on your bed,” she says. 

Damn it T.K.

Despite his best efforts to get T.K. to forget about the calendar, he’s given in a few times and allowed his boyfriend to use it to spice things up. Most of the suggestions are ridiculous, but Carlos has to begrudgingly admit that a few have been kind of fun. Still, he hadn’t expected anyone else to see the stupid thing.

“Why were you in my bedroom?” he asks, trying to keep his voice even, still not rising to the bait they’re dangling in front of him. 

“I was using your bathroom,” she says. She flips a couple of pages. “Did you guys try Day Nine? Oooh Tía Maria is going to make you go to confession for that one.”

“What’s Day Nine?” Francesca asks, wiping her hands on a towel and leaning over to see. “Oh god. Wow. Do you have that hip flexibility?”

“Okay, that’s enough,” Carlos says, unable to stand it any longer. “Give it to me.”

He holds out a hand but Adriana pulls it back. “No. I’m getting ideas.” She pulls out her phone. “Hold still.”

“Now what are you doing?” he asks.

She lifts the calendar and snaps a photo of it with him in the background. “Perfect. I’m going to hold onto this in case I ever need it for blackmail.”

“Adriana, give me the calendar,” he demands in his best police officer voice.

It does not work. 

She flips another page. “Oooh lap dance on Day Twelve! Nice that T.K. got to revisit his stripper roots on that one.”

He lunges for her, his hand closing around air as she darts away from him into the living room. “Adriana I am not kidding!” he yells as he follows her.

She runs around the couch, facing him down on the other side as she flips another page. “Tell us Carlos, what is your ‘free naughty wish’?” 

“My current wish is that you leave here and never come back!” he says, feinting to the left and then dashing to the right to try and catch her.

She squeaks and evades him again by climbing up onto the couch cushions, holding the calendar high above her head. 

“Get down from there! No shoes on the furniture!” Carlos yells.

“Throw a pillow at him!” Francesca says from where she’s mixing new frosting and watching the entire situation unfold.

He turns around sharply and glares at her. “Shut up!”

“You shut up!”

He changes course and stalks toward her. “Oh hell no Carlitos,” she says, cutting through the dining room and holding the mixing bowl threateningly above the floor in front of Lou II’s aquarium. “I will drop this on your carpet and I will not feel bad about it.”

“Day four seems messy,” Adriana says.

“Stop reading it!” Carlos yells.

“Um, hi?” 

They all turn toward the once again open loft door to find T.K. standing there, his work bag in hand. 

“T.K.! You’re here!” Francesca says in delight.

Carlos uses the momentary distraction to vault the couch and snatch the calendar from a shocked Adriana. She lets out a squawk and topples into the cushions as he lands on the other side, triumphant. “Hey babe,” he says, slightly breathless. “Welcome home.”

“This looks fun,” T.K. says, that gleam in his eyes that says he’s going to be of absolutely no help to Carlos. 

Everyone dreams that their family will get along with their significant other. Sometimes Carlos dreams that T.K. would get along a little worse with his.

“T.K. I need to know, who was on top when you did Day Thirteen and do you have regrets?” Adriana asks.

“Our personal life is none of your business!” Carlos hisses at her.

“Then why did you leave your sex-vent calendar out in the open?”

And that is when Carlos loses it. He’s sixteen years old again, the two of them invading his privacy, and he reacts accordingly. “IT WASN’T IN THE OPEN IT WAS IN OUR BEDROOM AND YOU’RE NOT EVEN SUPPOSED TO BE HERE AT ALL!”

There’s a brief moment of silence as they all process his outrage. And then, “T.K. want a cookie?” Francesca asks.

“I would love one,” T.K. says. “But I think your brother might combust if I don’t talk him down a little bit first.”

She shrugs. “They’re here when you’re ready.”

“I’m fine,” Carlos snaps when T.K. walks over to him.

“Mmmm okay,” T.K. says, amusement on his face. “Come on, come here for a minute.”

Carlos follows him into the bedroom and stands stiffly with his arms crossed as T.K. shuts the door, giving the illusion of privacy even though his sister and cousin can probably still hear every word. “This is why we should have gotten rid of this thing!” Carlos yell whispers at his boyfriend, shaking the calendar angrily. “You can’t leave it lying around! My family has no boundaries! They wander in and out at will! This is our private sex life and I don’t want them to be a part of it!”

“I know,” T.K. says calmly, prying it gently from his fingers. “I get it. I’ll make sure it gets put away where no one can find it.”

“Thank you,” Carlos says, releasing an angry breath. “Sorry, I didn’t mean for you to come home to this.”

“Carlos I am familiar with the ways of your sister and your cousin. It doesn’t surprise me anymore to come home and find them hanging around.”

“Does it surprise you that they broke into our home to bake pornographic cookies in our oven?” Carlos says bitterly.

T.K.’s eyebrows rise. “That…is a little surprising, yes.”

“Well that’s what’s happening. So, yeah.”

He sits down on the bed and tosses the calendar down beside him. T.K. steps forward until their knees bump together. “You know what might help?” he asks gently.

“What?” Carlos asks, still feeling moody and pissed off at his family.

T.K. rubs a hand up and down his arm, that gleam back in his eye. “If we try out Day Sixteen again.”

Carlos flashes him a sour look. “I hate you.”

“But you loved Day Sixteen,” T.K. says, pushing a hand into Carlos’ curls. 

That’s true. And T.K.’s sweet smile and bright eyes and the way his fingers feel in Carlos’ hair make his stomach do that stupid flippy thing that always happens when T.K. is around and he feels himself teenage angsting a little less. But then he glances down at the advent calendar beside him and remembers what a nightmare it’s been.

“I don’t think we should use it anymore,” Carlos says.

“Not even for Day Sixteen?” T.K. tries.

“We don’t need a calendar for Day Sixteen. We already know how to do it.”

T.K. sighs. “Fine. You win. I will get rid of the advent calendar.” 

“Really?”

“Yes. Really. It’s clearly bothering you, so I’ll make it disappear.”

A smidgen of guilt flitters through Carlos, but the relief at not having to worry about the unpleasant side effects the calendar seems to bring them overpowers it. “Can you get rid of my sister and cousin too?” He realizes he sounds whiny, but he’s too wound up to care.

“I will.” T.K. says. “But it might take a little while. You know how difficult it is to get them to leave.”

Carlos sighs. “I know.”

“And your mom would probably want us to invite them to stay for dinner.”

“Ugghhhh,” Carlos groans. “Fine.”

T.K. steps back and holds out a hand. “Now come on. I’m actually dying to see these cookies.”

Carlos lets T.K. pull him to his feet. “I knew you would be.”

Noche Buena has always been chaos at his parents’ house, and it’s only gotten crazier since his sisters started getting married and having kids. Their family seems to expand by at least ten people a year and everyone has an open invitation to show at up at any point throughout the night.

Carlos goes over early to help with tamale assembly. The house is already full of family even though it’s early yet. His sisters are all here with their husbands and kids, and a few cousins, tíos, and tías have shown up to help with food prep too. He smiles as he listens to his mom and Tía Maria argue over how much salt to use in the masa. They have the same argument every year and every year the tamales are exactly as good as the year before no matter how much or how little salt they put in. 

He’s stirring what equates to a vat of sauce when the doorbell rings. “I’ve got it Andrea, your hands are full,” Tía Lucy says as his mother searches in vain for a towel on which to wipe them.

She disappears from the kitchen and seconds later he hears her exclaim, “T.K.! Feliz Navidad, come in, come in!”

“T.K. is here?” The words are spoken nearly in chorus and the next thing Carlos knows he’s been left completely alone as every woman in the house flocks to the front door. When they return they have his boyfriend in tow. 

“Now you know that you are family in this house, no more ringing the doorbell mijo,” Carlos’ mom is chastising him as they walk in, the rest of the group murmuring their agreements and insistence that he simply walk in and out at will like everyone else as they return to their food prep duties.

“I’ll remember for next time,” T.K. promises, even though Carlos knows full well that he won’t. 

“T.K.! Come taste this!” Lucía, one of Carlos’ middle sisters, holds out a cookie toward him.

He takes it dutifully, his eyes finding Carlos’ and sparkling with joy. Sometimes Carlos feels like his family is some kind of zoo exhibit, wild and crazy and amusing to anyone on the outside. But T.K.’s brightness and exuberance have fit seamlessly into the mix. In fact sometimes Carlos thinks T.K. fits in better than he himself ever has. 

“Ay, let the man kiss his boyfriend. They haven’t seen each other in hours,” Teresa says over the chatter, her Mrs. Claus apron fluttering as she bends over to check on things in the oven.

They let him through the crowd and Carlos pauses his stirring to give T.K. a brief peck on the lips. “Welcome to the crazy,” he says with a smile.

“I love the crazy,” T.K. reminds him.

“I know,” Carlos says, warmth filling him from head to toe. “Don’t let them talk your ear off. Oh,” he lowers his voice, “and definitely do not answer if Tía Maria and Tía Dolores ask you whose pozole is better. It’s a trap.”

“Got it,” T.K. says, giving him a mock salute with his un-cookied hand.

“Carlos! The sauce will burn! Stir!” Tía Maria calls out sternly and Carlos quickly returns to his duties. 

T.K. is pulled away after that, plied with food and drinks and taken to the living room for conversation by most of the tías. “Mom, go with them,” Elena urges. “We’ll handle things in here.”

“There’s still so much to do,“ his mom protests.

“We’ve got it,” Lucía insists. “Go.”

She looks reluctant, but removes her apron. “Don’t let Adriana and Francesca touch the masa.”

“Hey!” they protest at the same time from where they’re seated on the counter’s barstools, both of them halfway through their second glasses of wine and doing absolutely nothing to help.

“You heard me,” she says, giving them all a warning look before disappearing out the door.

Carlos switches hands, his right arm aching from stirring. Teresa sidles up to him. “So,” she says. “How’s the advent calendar working out for you?”

Carlos whips around. “I’m going to murder you!” he says, holding the dripping spoon out like a weapon at his sister and cousin. He should have known they wouldn’t keep it to themselves. 

“No murder during the holidays,” Teresa tells him.

“What?” Francesca asks. “She asked how you guys were doing. What was I supposed to say?”

“Literally anything else,” Carlos tells her through gritted teeth.

“I think it’s fun,” Lucía says. “You’ve gotta keep things interesting somehow.”

“But not too interesting. That’s how you end up like this,” Elena says, rubbing a hand over her pregnant belly.

“Good thing Carlos and T.K. don’t have that problem,” Adriana says. “All fun and no consequences.”

“Tell us about Day Nine,” Lucía says, her eyes sparkling. “That sounded very fun.”

“Since when did we become a family that discusses our sex lives?” Carlos asks, feeling suddenly hot and short of breath.

“Oh we’ve always talked about it,” Elena tells him. “You’ve just never gotten to be part of it because you’ve never brought a boy home before.”

“Sh! Shut up!” Teresa hisses, all of them going quiet as Tía Maria reenters the kitchen. 

She looks at them suspiciously. “Your mother wants the green tablecloth with the poinsettias on it.”

“I’ll get it,” Francesca says, hopping off her bar stool and opening a drawer next to the pantry. “Here you go.” She’s doing this fake sweet innocent thing with her face that makes her look even more guilty.

“Gracias,” Tía Maria says, still eyeing them all as if she knows exactly what they were just talking about. “Carlos, you’re not stirring.”

“Sorry tía,” he says, quickly turning around and going back to work. 

She gives them all one more look and then leaves. Carlos puts his spoon down and turns on his sisters. “And that is just one reason why I don’t like talking about my sex life. Are you trying to get me lectured on Christmas Eve?”

“God don’t be such a prude,” Adriana says with a roll of her eyes, popping a chocolate into her mouth and talking around it. “You’re over here gatekeeping the good stuff from us.”

“I’m not gatekeeping anything,” Carlos says. “You could get that stupid calendar on Amazon if you really wanted it. And we didn’t even finish it anyway.”

“Uh oh. Trouble in paradise?” Elena asks.

“Did one of you get a sex injury?” Francesca wants to know.

“God I can’t remember the last time I had a sex injury,” Lucía says wistfully.

“No!” Carlos says. “I told him we had to stop because everyone kept asking us about it.”

There’s silence in the kitchen. “You quashed your boyfriend’s holiday sex fun?” Teresa asks. “Yikes Carlos. Not good.”

“What a Scrooge,” Adriana mutters.

And odd mix of guilt and embarrassment floods through him. “I—it was—“

“Someone literally handed you a book of Christmas sex ideas and you turned it down,” Francesca shakes her head. “I’m ashamed to call you family.”

“Rejecting your partner can be very damaging to the relationship,” Lucía says as if she’s reciting from a self-help book. “Especially at the holidays.”

“I really don’t need your advice thanks,” Carlos says, even as her words hit home. Has T.K. been feeling rejected? He hasn’t seemed off or upset but…sometimes T.K. is really good at hiding things from him.

“Just saying this is Texas. There are plenty of other Carlos Reyeses around if T.K. feels like you’re not respecting his interests,” Francesca tells him right before she drains her wine glass.

“Okay, we’ve made the poor boy suffer enough. Let’s leave it,” Teresa says, finally taking back the reins of peacemaking oldest sister. “But seriously Carlos,” she says, leaning closer so only he can hear, “you should live a little. Before you know it you’re old and married and have to schedule sex on Google calendar between karate classes and PTO meetings. Take advantage while you’re both still young and fun.”

Carlos feels stricken. He continues stirring automatically, but as soon as he can persuade Lucía to take over he goes to find T.K. 

His boyfriend is laughing at something Tía Lucy is saying and Carlos pauses for a moment to appreciate how natural T.K. looks sitting with the rest of the Reyes clan. If T.K. thinks organizing their sock drawer is the sexiest thing he could possibly do, he is deeply, deeply wrong. Seeing T.K. fit into their family like he’s always been there is a massive turn on.

But there are more important matters at hand so Carlos pulls himself back to the moment and interrupts. “Hey, sorry tía. T.K., can I talk to you for a second?”

“Ooh some Christmas secrets? Or are you two off to kiss under the mistletoe?” Tía Lucy asks, the sparkle in her eyes matching the one Lucía had earlier. “Wait! I have some in my pocket you can use.”

“That’s okay, we’re good,” Carlos says, waving her off as T.K. gets to his feet. “We’ll be right back.”

T.K. follows him up the stairs and down the hall to his childhood bedroom. “Everything okay babe?” he asks when the door is shut securely behind them, his brow furrowed in concern.

“Did I make you feel rejected?” Carlos asks. “When I said no more advent calendar?”

“Rejected? What are you talking about?” T.K. asks in confusion.

“I told you no more advent calendar. Did that make you upset?” 

“I mean…it was kind of a bummer,” T.K. admits. “I was having fun and I thought you were too when you weren’t sexting our friends or chasing your family around the loft.” He shrugs. “But it’s fine. It’s not that big of a deal.”

“You’re sure?”

“Yeah,” T.K. says, patting his stomach reassuringly. “Come on. Tía Lucy was about to tell me about the time she went paragliding in Hawai’i.”

T.K. heads out the door and back to the party, leaving Carlos to relive the kitchen conversation on his own. All he can think about is scheduling sex on Google calendar. Which sounds exactly like something he would do. And he absolutely does not want that to be their future. 

Maybe his sisters are right. Maybe he is too much of a prude. 

Carlos looks around and spots his dad’s printer. Before he can second guess himself he grabs a piece of paper and goes to work. 

XXX

T.K. is woken by soft, but persistent kisses. He inhales deeply, eyes fluttering open, gritty with lack of sleep. “Hey,” he grinds out.

“Merry Christmas,” Carlos says softly, pressing another kiss to his lips, then sliding his body over until he’s draped across T.K.’s torso. He trails kisses across T.K.’s collar bone, around his pec, and then back up to his neck.

“Mmm, that’s nice,” T.K. says, shifting a little bit to get more comfortable.

“Yeah?”

“Yeah.” 

They’re crammed into the full size bed in Carlos’ childhood bedroom, but T.K. doesn’t mind a bit. It means they have to snuggle close, cuddling each other while they sleep.

Last night they’d donned matching pajamas and stayed up late playing games with Carlos’ sisters and brothers-in-law after the kids went to bed. T.K. had stuffed his face with tamales and buñuelos and laughed at the antics of the Reyes children. They’re a special kind of chaos and it’s very funny to see his calm, sweet boyfriend absolutely lose his shit over a board game. 

T.K. skates a hand across Carlos’ bicep and up the back of his neck, toying with the soft curls he finds there. “What time is it? Do we need to get up?”

Carlos shakes his head. “I don’t hear the kids yet.”

T.K. blinks a few times and squints so he can focus on the alarm clock next to the bed. “Carlos!” he squawks. “It’s five o’clock in the morning!”

“I know,” Carlos says, nuzzling into his neck.

“Baby.” It comes out on a long suffering groan. “We’ve only been asleep for like four hours.”

“We need to take care of the final day of the advent calendar before everyone wakes up,” Carlos tells him softly, his nose brushing against the shell of T.K.’s ear.

T.K. frowns and pulls back a bit, forcing Carlos to lift his head and look at him. “The advent calendar is done. The last day was yesterday.”

“Mmmm, are you sure about that?”

“Yes?” T.K. says in confusion. “It was Game in Santa. Which we couldn’t figure out.”

“You know I’ve always thought it was kind of lame that you don’t get anything from an advent calendar on the twenty-fifth,” Carlos says. “It seems like you should get an even bigger gift.”

“I think that’s the point. You get something every day and then all your Christmas gifts on the twenty-fifth,” T.K. tells him.

“I don’t like it,” Carlos tells him.

T.K. snorts. “I’ll be sure and submit your complaint to the advent calendar council.”

“Good,” Carlos says, nuzzling down into his chest again. “But for now, I think you should check the advent calendar and make sure we didn’t miss anything.”

“The advent calendar is at home.”

“Is it?”

“It should be since you made me swear on my life that I would hide it away from any prying eyes.”

Carlos rolls away from him and reaches over the side of the bed, dropping a piece of computer paper on his chest. “Carlos what on earth?” he asks with a laugh.

“Take a look,” Carlos says, a smirk on his face.

T.K. reaches over and turns on the bedside lamp and squints as he reads Carlos’ bold handwriting.

Day 25: Fulfill a Fantasy.

He looks up at Carlos, a questioning look at his face. “What does this mean?”

“What do you think it means?”

“I—-I have no idea. You’re going to have to spell it out babe.”

Carlos pushes up onto an elbow and uses his free hand to grip T.K.’s hip, stroking his thumb back and forth right along the waistband of his pajama pants. “You stole Adriana’s phone last night.”

“You saw that?”

“I did,” Carlos says. “You deleted the blackmail photo she took of me and the calendar, didn’t you?”

“Very good detective,” T.K. says with a chuckle.

“You took care of me,” Carlos says, his voice low. “I think you deserve something special for that.”

He pulls T.K. closer and kisses him, firm and insistent, his mouth warm and wet and it sends sparks flittering through T.K.’s core. He pulls back for a second. “Are we going to have sex in your childhood bedroom?”

“Mhm,” Carlos says, diving in for another kiss.

T.K. lets him go for a second and then pulls back again. “We’re not allowed to have sex in your childhood bedroom. You tell me all the time that we’re not allowed to have sex in here.”

“I know.” Another kiss.

“Then what—?” 

“Isn’t it one of your fantasies to have sex with me in here?”

“I mean yeah but—“

“Well,” Carlos says, trailing a finger down T.K.’s bare stomach so that his muscles jump and twitch under his touch. “Let’s consider this a one-time special Christmas gift. But you are going to have to be very, very quiet.”

“What if your sisters walk by?”

“The door is locked.”

“What if your mom walks by?”

“T.K. do you want to do this or not?”

God he’s so turned on right now. Carlos’ fingers dip beneath the line of his boxers and T.K. arches into his touch, letting out a moan that Carlos immediately swallows in another kiss. “Yes,” he says breathlessly when Carlos releases him from it. “God yes, yes, yes.”

“That’s what I thought.”

“This is going to get us both on the naughty list,” he says.

Carlos laughs. “I think I can deal with that for one year.”

Tagging some people who might be interested in reading: @lemonlyman-dotcom, @liminalmemories21, @carlos-in-glasses

[almdragonrend]

Hey, so I found a new Hamefura x pokemon fanfiction and had a short talk in the comments and I wanted to show how it got as you see my stands on OG Katarina and how I feel about her and it always feels freeing when I get to talk about it. So here's it

That was when it hit me ‘Wait… How am I gonna get food for everyone, let alone myself. I don’t think there’s many employers that’ll be willing to hire a teenager or former noble as a mercenary or bodyguard so I won’t always be able to get jobs, If only I could get a Pokémon that makes food for me’

That is really hate OG Keith and Geordo and Maria, OG Katarina was just fighting for her 7 year long relationship and all the promises made to her, and they send her Fu*ing die for it, they CHOOSE to be Monsters!!!

Page_Plague on Chapter 5Wed 24 Apr 2024 02:23AM CEST

Yah, I mean OG Katarina is a b*tch, especially to Keith, but she definitely didn’t deserve to starve to death and OG Geordo most certainly could’ve attempted to try and fix some of the behaviour but he probably didn’t because of apathy.

AlmDragonrend on Chapter 5Wed 24 Apr 2024 08:11AM CEST

OG Katarina isn't really that bad, we see how she interacted with Sianna and Anne and even some of her group to an extent in VoD and she was certainly a lot Kinder than 99'9,8% of the Noble's of Sociar, and the only people we have seen her openly be mean to are Maria and Keith both of which she has pretty strong and justified reasons to Hate, in case of Keith his me presence has torn her parents relationship apart, I know it wasn't his fault but she was a little Girl than he showed up and her family got torn apart how can anyone expect from her to take that well ? + he had it we better with the Claes than with his Original family the Colemans who.. ah yes WANTED TO KILL HIM!!!!! The funny thing is Keith has that "I'm don't want to be a Monster *crying noise*" thing going on the thing is when he partook in the Conspiracy against Katarina he very much CHOSE to be a Monster!!! What he did made their made him a Monster no qustiones ask, Luigi saved him from being killed of by his own family sacrificed the state of the Claes family in the process and how does this little parasite thank him ? By helping send the Daughter of his Savior to her demise! I think alone for that he should have left him with the Colemans!

And when it comes to Maria, Original Maria is literally a Bitch, she is the main character of FL and chose the route she wants to go which means she actively pursued 5 different Mann of high political status and while I'm not against polyarmoy if everyone involved is okay with it, in this case two of them already had a fiancée and both of those fiancée but a lot of afort in this relationship they had for half their lives and now they are expected to give up all they worked so hard for their entire life and take the L just because Miss Campbell comes out of nowhere with no idea of how a princess has to act and non of the training both Katarina and Mary had to endure for years on end !!! just because miss Campbell thinks she deserves to be Princess, and when one of them justified fights back she steals everything this girl has her home, her family, her parents, her birthright, and send her over seas to die! And Don't make me start on how she used Sophia to get close to Nicole, Original Maria is a greedy, malicious, underhanded, selfish and heartless Monster !!!!

Page_Plague on Chapter 5Wed 24 Apr 2024 09:16AM CEST

Oh ok, I didn’t read Verge of Doom cuz I didn’t think it was all that different to the main series Manga and Anime that I did finish (I’ll read it later)

Also good argument

AlmDragonrend on Chapter 5Wed 24 Apr 2024 03:06PM CEST

Thank you, I'm just glad more people start to realize those facts, that is a pretty good sign I think

[rrxnjun]

Hello hi hi Bar <3, this is gonna be a bit long and yapful. Hope you are doing well and feeling good. I was the anon who asked about mxm fics around this time last year if you remember, removing my anon because why not (i feel bold and i like you). What actually prompted me to send this ask , I would talk about it later.

So I haven't read all your fics, honestly only some of them and I have loved literally all of them equally that I cannot choose the best. As a Renjun biased person I am always super crazy about blondes are done with fun and portrait of a blank slate (and they also had the smut tag sksks). Now now idk why am I explaining this but it is necessary I think. So I am someone who prefers to read longer fics with the smut tag among other tags because i am a bit 😈 lol and mainly because if they are completely wholesome (fluffy, angsty, etc) and innocent I get so attached and so delusional, especially because they are fan fics, and I start feeling crazy and am not able to get over easily because they are so pure. Smut personally gives me a sense of detachment and reality and it's a bit comic and hot of course. So yeah this is also one of the reasons I have read only a few fics of yours. But the latest one I read was Liebestraum and GOD OH MY GODDDDDD, idk where to begin, it's been a while, I think I read it last year and it didn't have any smut iirc, I got so so so so so attached, each time I looked at your blog, it reminded me of those long summer days, Jisung lying on the floor, feeling empty, the angst, the longing, the fic felt so real. The ending almost made me cry, and the almost crying feeling is the worst, because you're not able to let out anything but you're not able to keep it in either. It was very bittersweet. And the yearning, the longing for idk what, hurt, hurt so much but hurt so good. I listened to your playlist as well and after that I used to listen to Liebestraum a lot and each time I used to picture all that, the scenes, the feelings, etc. I think I am still not completely over it, to be able to read anything else from your blog. But it felt so painfully good. I really really loved it so much, I felt as if I lived it in real time. It felt like I was there, in the room when Jisung was lying on the floor in his aunt's house, not so fond of the summer break, or when him and y/n went to the beach(?) or when they did fun activities together, I was there with them, it felt so real, I could almost touch them... So yes that's what your writing feels like🥹🌻 (stopping or else I will go on forever) And like people usually hate summers but I like them, I was born during summer break and there is something bittersweet about the summer break, something nostalgic, yk summertime sadness lol, something nothing, something empty, something so full yet so light about it that I love oh so much, and I was able to feel all that through Liebestraum and hence it's special. And now I have come back after months, feeling like I finally moved on somewhat, because I take time with my feelings, to read more from you but it makes me nervous ngl.

Now coming back to my original purpose of this ask, I was reading your carrd and info again and I realized we are the same age (you won't believe me but I rarely find someone exactly my age like this) and I am psychology major as well🥺 and my mbti which I checked two years back was infp too(i think yours is different now). And the mutual groups that we stan, both of us have at least one bias in common ✨️ and all this coincidence got me excited like an 8 year old giggly kid. So idk lol, I just wanted to tell you skksks. You carrd was really cute and you sound really sweet. And if itxs not too personal, are you still doing something psychology related?? And what does your description refer to? (only if you're okay answering)

Love ya and your writing lots ❣️

hi hi hi!! omg this ask made me whip out my laptop to make sure i reply to everything omg,,, dw about it being long i enjoy those a whole lot!!! hope you're doing well and feeling good too! i do remember your ask, actually, and it makes me happy you came off anon bc you like me HAHA

DFJKLAFJ blondes are done with fun and portrait of a blank slate are actually the only smuts i've ever written and even those arent as explicit TT i do know what you mean with your reasoning, though!! for me i didnt use to enjoy smut if it had no plot ((still struggling with that a little, i feel like i need at least SOME plot to really enjoy reading a smut fic) so you kinda have the opposite problem?? HAHA. i do get kinda delulu too so i get you <//3 some fics ive read on here definitely made moving on from them kinda hard.

at first i didn't really like liebestraum, if im being completely honest. i had an innitial idea for this fic and posted a teaser for it and then deleted it because i hated it and then a sweet anon approached me and asked about that fic (we are now online best friends and met up irl three times can u believe that)) and i decided to give it another shot and rewrite it,, because i knew i kinda had to get the idea out somehow?? i think this fic is special in a way that jisung's inner monologue deeply resembles mine in some parts. summer is always very bittersweet for me and very difficult for me to handle, if im being honest, so getting this out really helped to cope with it all in a way? hearing you say you enjoyed it so much and felt such a connection to a personal work of mine makes me really happy, if i'm being honest. sometimes its hard to really wrap my head around the fact that somebody percieves my work and connects with it, so this whole ask feels kinda surreal, but i am insanely grateful for it. thank you so SO much for sending this ask in, i will treasure it for a long long LONG time. strangely enough, i only really know ppl who like summer, so it's strange to see you think it's otherwise?? but dont let anyone take that joy away from you. <3 i am a fall lover at my heart and i know people usually hate that season, but i enjoy it a lot:) hearing u call my work special makes me feel special and emotional, thank you so much. even if you dont manage to read another work from me, dont worry about it. i am already so grateful for this message and for your words i could never be "mad" at you, haha.

omg my carrd is so outddated i should update the info DFKJJAL but omg fr?? i feel 03 liners are a rare breed tbh i only know a few on here so welcome into the gang !! oh fr??? thats crazy!!! my mbti is infj-t rn tho HAHAHA i retook the test this year after a debate with another psych major. and that is so cool omg we should definitely be friends now (thank u for the compliments on the carrd also! its a template so i didn't make it, i just added the pics in and tweaked it around to my liking haha)

i am still majoring in psychology! im gonna be in my 3rd year after summer break and working on my thesis so i can get my bachelors :) after that im applying for masters haha. i don't really know what i wanna do postgrad yet, but i don't really think therapy is for me, so maybe something diagnostic related?? maybe stats or research? we'll see.

oh and my blog description is a lyric from the song dark by dominic fike :) i am a big dominic fike fan and that song is very personal and special for me and it got me through some difficult times. i really love that lyric because of its symbolism :))

[zerolostwalks]

No excuses writing: the end 👀

Hello there! Since I've already discussed the We Run Together planned ending I guess I will talk about the Ending for Even Though it Hurts (Which I feel like I have talked about before but tumblr search and my memory are both crap so apologies if I am repeating myself)

Once again hiding it below the cut in case anyone does not want to see/read it yet. Also it's quite extensive

no excuses writing asks

First and foremost there are currently three vibe songs I've got playing in my head every time I deal with this story. (Which makes writing it difficult. I'm just going to have to go ahead and fully write out this ending one day so my brain will let me go back and fill in the middle)

Julie POV: Tot Musica as sung by Ado or AmaLee

Party POV 1: Mephisto's Lullaby by Xtortion Audio

Party POV 2: Without You by Ursine Vulpine, Annaca

Second: some establishing lore that has to be set up within the story

It was already alluded to with Luke and will probably be brought up again but if you are not careful when you are using your inclination it can and will drain and kill you.

Flynn relays to group, that her father taught her that everyone has an inclination. Just some are so adept/bizarre/ingrained/small that they do not realize what it is

Julie has a few bounties on her head, it's why she's on the run when she meets Reggie. Eventually it's revealed the bounties are because her inclination happens to be necromancy(she tends to focus on healing, and everyone thought it was a weak inclination because of how much it drained her using it)

One of those bounties was put out by Caleb, who wants the power for himself

(There's also some minor details regarding the soul bond marks on Luke and Bobby. . .the most important thing to know there is in this verse soul bond marks are things you actively choose)

So without giving too much more away of the middle story bits. Caleb gets his hands on Julie and manages to manipulate her to use her power. This sort of backfires on him, because she ends up draining him, and a lot of his people as well.

While that's happening the rest of the party is trying to get to Julie, because it quickly becomes clear (she's extremely emotional and has sort of refused to train up on her inclination) that she's lost control.

They end up being too late.

But don't worry, I'm pulling a reverse Uno card on the JatP finale. So instead of Julie thinking she's lost the guys and bringing them back with the united power of love, it's the guys(and Flynn, Bobby, and Willie) thinking they've lost Julie and bringing her back.

They pull an inadvertent D&D divine intervention and sort of summon Rose who helps bring Julie back. Julie and Rose get to have a second goodbye. And then everyone discovers they've all got new matching golden soul bond marks. (Really by this point they've all got varying levels of tattoo sleeves because soul bond marks can be both weirder and simpler than they'd all been taught)

[quinnthebard]

wip wednesday but its thursday my dudes

thank you so much for the tag @allaganexarch! I tag in turn anyone else that happens to have anything they wish to share. I've lost track of who is and who isn't actively working on anything atm oops

Below the cut, have some nonsense from a future chapter of my BG3 fic. Astarion drank and Sarynna might be a little tipsy, just a bit, as a treat.

They sit side by side outside his tent after. It’d become a bit of a ritual of theirs. Sarynna must have realized quickly that he would refuse to ask to feed from her. As good as she tasted, it felt wrong and honestly he got what he needed most the first time. So instead, she would go to him and explicitly offer to which he’d gladly agree. It was an odd kindness he hadn’t expected from her but perhaps she liked him more than he thought—which was useful information to have. Regardless, she kept surprising him.

At first they’d have a quick whispered conversation but then she and him worked out a signal. She’d tap his elbow twice if she noticed it was time and he’d nod in affirmation that yes, he could use a boost, to which she’d nod back in consent. Then they’d meet that night in his tent and get it done. Afterwards, he would retrieve the hearty stew that Gale insisted will make her feel better near instantly—it never did but she always put on a show for the wizard. Eventually, Shadowheart would stop by to make sure all is well, giving Astarion a minorly scathing look while she worked.

And then, once Sarynna no longer was being fretted over, they drank.

Gods, he missed the sun. They’d hardly spent a half day in the Underdark and he lusted after the sunset views as everyone wound down from a long day. Here, the most light they get is from torches and fire and the odd glowing mushroom. He took a swig from his bottle, a vintage they found in the Selunite outpost immediately upon arrival. It’s sour but better than nothing if he had to choose.

Turning his attention to Sarynna, he watched as she also took a sip from her glass while her bowl of stew remained mostly untouched, its contents merely shifted around and picked at. She hummed under her breath as she watched their surroundings, a slight curve to her lips. Out of nowhere, she loosed a giggle then looked up at him with a mischievous glint in her azure eyes.

“I think Lae’zel is jealous.”

Astarion blinked at the observation. Bards are supposed to be good with people right? How did Sarynna read their githyanki friend so poorly. “I assure you, she is not jealous of you.” Lae’zel had made it very clear she did not want to be bitten early on in their travels much to his disappointment.

She took a swig from the bottle of wine. “Not me. Karlach.” A giggle slipped past her lips. “Shadowheart was thrilled when Karlach joined the group. I heard her mutter under her breath, ‘looks like she could pick me up and carry me to safety’. Lae’zel was scowling the rest of the day and making a show of her training each night since.”

“Oh?” Astarion rested his chin on the back of his hand, leaning closer. “Do tell me more.”

“They pretend to hate each other.” A pause. “I think they honestly did at first. But they had that huge argument and I yelled at them and then they had a spar? And since then I just assumed they came to an understanding but…”

“Don’t leave me hanging, darling.”

Sarynna’s eyes looked around camp, checking if anyone could hear her. Which of course they could, she was lightheaded from blood loss, had hardly touched her dinner but insisted on wine. She wasn’t exactly being discreet.

Finally, she curled a finger urging him closer to which he obliged. “I saw them stalk off to the abandoned building by camp after the celebration together.”

“No.”

“Yes!" Another giggle that quickly evolved into an honest fit of laughter. “Honestly. Good for them.”

“You think?”

“I think finding happiness in our predicament is important. No matter how fleeting.” She yawned, stretching her arms in wide arcs and nearly hitting him in the face. “Besides, Lae’zel is a lot more relaxed now that she’s gotten a good fuck.”

He had to purse his lips to avoid laughing. “I think… you’re a bit drunk.”

“Nah, I had…” She squinted at the bottle. “Just a few sips.”

“And I had quite a few more sips from you. You need to eat.”

“Hmm.” Staring at her bowl forlornly, she picked up her fork. “I have a confession.”

“I bet.”

She frowned. “I’m sick of camp food.”

“What, used to better than what your dear wizard cooks up?”

“I miss mom’s food.” Then her eyes widened as she processed his words fully. “What do you mean my wizard?”

Gods, she’s dense, he scoffed. “Oh, tell me you’ve noticed the way he lusts after you.”

“We’re friends.”

“Sure you are.”

Sarynna grimaced, squinting up at him as she squirmed. Her knee brushed against his. “We are. It just sounds like you’re jealous.”

“I’m not jealous. It was just an observation, darling. Don’t flatter yourself.”

“So you wouldn’t mind if I just take this over to Gale’s tent and bother him instead?” The cheeky woman began to stand and instinctively he grabbed her wrist, yanking her back down beside him.

“Don’t you dare leave me. You make the camp bearable.”

He watched as her cheeks flushed red. Her skin was so warm against his, her bare arms flush against his after being pulled back to ground. The customary gap left between them had been fully closed by his childish actions—actions he did not find himself regretting.

Again, she picked up her fork and this time took a bite. She chewed while watching the fire and in turn he watched her, mesmerized by the way the flickering flames of the campfire made shadows dance across her cheekbones. Even watching her perform such mundane tasks was better than brooding over the past and what could have or should have been. He couldn't imagine a different version of events he'd prefer. Well, barring never having had to deal with Cazador at all. Avoiding that in its entirety would have been optimal but he never did have such luck.

Sarynna continued to eat in silence, her posture relaxing over time until she leaned against him ever so slightly. An odd development, Astarion mused. Sure, Sarynna may know him best so far of all his travelling companions but he got the impression that despite how close they were in comparison to his bond with the rest of the crew, they weren’t truly that close. But something had shifted, just enough that he found himself seeking out these odd moments, the brush of her skin against his. The quiet that usually came with solitude now shared.

A terrifying thought filled his mind: perhaps he wouldn’t mind them getting closer after all. His body certainly reacted to hers and if her elevated pulse was anything to go by, he did the same for her. Perhaps that’s all he needed to do, stay the course, continue to lure her in. Don’t focus on the fact that he might actually enjoy himself. He’d built himself a script to follow over the centuries, no need to stray from it. With that thought, he took the plunge.

“Well now, looks like my treat has their cheeks all flushed.” He smirked as her cheeks reddened further. “You know, you could always come to my bed tonight. Won’t you?”

“A little treat? Come on, Astarion, you can do better than that.” He twisted his lips, fighting a smirk.

“Oh, I certainly can and it’d be my pleasure. How about this one: All these accolades from the Tieflings are nothing compared to the sound of my name, cried from your lips.”

“Is that your best?”

“Hmm, let me give it another go. Every part of your perfect body whispers temptation—it’s as if the Gods made you just to ruin me.”

Sarynna snorted. “And these actually worked on Cazador’s targets?”

“Well they worked on you last time, didn’t they? How about if I said these little words… Everyone’s favorite…” He schooled his features and ignored the sudden chill that ran through his arms. “I love you.” Something unreadable flickered across her face before she laughed.

Having fun, are you?”

“I am. It’s hard not to with you. Now, as much as I relish standing around and saying all my favorite lines at you, I’d much rather we got to experience each others’ full portfolio of talents once again.”

[crystalelemental]

i LOVED reading your xy choices post so much!! xy / kalos is my favorite group and region, so seeing someone else analyze like this is lovely. i loved your thoughts, and i’d love to read more! you also mentioned in your lodge post that you could have a field day with the implications of sycamore & diantha not being interesting to sere, i’d love to hear those 👀

This is now attempt 2, after my computer ate the first response, but hey, maybe that means I’ll be more concise (doubt).  Anyway, thank you!  I admit that Kalos hasn’t always been my favorite, but since getting Masters, I’d been really reflective on the game and enjoying coming up with ideas about what they were aiming for, and...I’ve kinda convinced myself to really like it.

Anyway!  Here’s the original post for those unfamiliar.  I’m going to continue with the “Serena as the protagonist” thing, but let’s talk a bit more about the choice and why I think it’s super neat that Serena doesn’t seem to consider Sycamore or Diantha as her friends despite other protagonists really liking their professor and champion.

To summarize the big point: the choice of which button to push is the big event of XY, not the confrontation with Lysandre.  When you guess right, Xerosic will still activate the weapon, and Lysandre states openly that he disagrees with that action, indicating that it wasn’t the outcome that matters, but that Serena made a choice at all.  Because there are other options.  You can refuse to choose and endanger lives.  You can just prevent Xerosic from doing anything.  But given that the game won’t let you leave, I like to interpret that as “anything outside the choice doesn’t occur to Serena.”  Which makes some sense.  You’ve crushed every challenge the game throws at you with ease, and this is just a coin flip.  You’ve handled worse at this point.  And it’s not like your friends have been any serious help either.  You’ve got this.

Imagine you’re right.  Imagine the ego trip.  Once again, your actions have saved everyone, and the only reason it wasn’t a done deal right there is because Xerosic cheated.  Even his boss acknowledges you won that.  You are the best thing since sliced bread, and are an active savior of the region.  They’re even throwing a parade in your honor.  Nothing is beyond you.  You can solve for everything.  Except for other people.  Because inevitably, your help doesn’t work.  Even in this scenario, it didn’t truly work.  The right action met with the wrong person yielded bad results, but it wasn’t your fault.  It’s other people.  If they just listened to you, just accepted your help, did as you asked of them, everything would be fine.

But imagine the alternative.  Imagine you were wrong.  The curse of hindsight is being able to look back at that scenario and realize...you put everyone in danger.  You didn’t have to pick at all.  The crisis that faced the region?  That was as much your doing now as Lysandre’s.  And while you may have gone to fix it, you also started it.  So when they call you a hero, does it feel right?  When they throw a parade in your honor, do you feel like it’s earned?  When your friends are there receiving equal accolades, does it feel fair, knowing they weren’t around?  When the one handing out the medal is the man who did nothing, does it feel sincere?  None of these people helped you.  They laid the problem at your feet and told you to fix it.  You tried to.  You wanted to help.  You wanted to give.  And they were all too willing to take, even as they refused to lift a finger to give back.

Either way, you wind up thinking more like Lysandre.  You, the golden child, have been expected to handle everything, and rose to that challenge.  But win or lose, the ultimate issue is you largely did it alone.  You, the one cursed with greatness, needed to solve for the world’s problems.  You, and you alone, made that choice.  No one else was around.  No one else did anything.

I’ve seen takes about Sycamore in Masters as well, and how much more likeable he is.  But I think it’s worth noting that this Sycamore is post-XY, and has the benefit of hindsight as well.  He’s already had to confront the reality that Lysandre is actively dangerous.  But prior, a lot of people look at his actions and think “How can anyone not realize?”  But realistically, think about how often you’ve downplayed a friend’s racist or sexist jokes.  Think about how often your friends may do something dangerous or self-destructive, and your response is just passive compassionate statements, rather than doing anything to address the problem.  It’s easier to downplay warning signs when someone you care about and have known as a good person starts to slip.  For an example in my own field, most mass shootings occur with someone knowing full well it’s coming, and not doing or saying anything about it.  It’s easier to downplay than you think.  No one really wants to confront the fact someone they care about might be dangerous.  The only reason we condemn Sycamore so hard is because we’re outside of that situation, and have none of the context of their shared history.

And neither does Serena.  All she sees is an adult who is close to this actively dangerous person, who downplays everything.  Who doesn’t get involved.  Who doesn’t make a move, even when confronted with reality.  Who abandoned his responsibility.  It makes sense she doesn’t feel too fondly toward the professor, if she had to go through all of this with him prior.

Diantha is in a similar boat.  We know even less of her dynamic with Lysandre, but it’s clear she knew him.  They interact.  And while she pushes back on his philosophy, she ultimately doesn’t do anything.  She’s just as passive, willing to let a child handle this dangerous situation rather than doing anything as a champion.  Where was she through all of this?  It may not strictly be a champion’s responsibility to assist a region, but to do nothing in that scenario?

Diantha and Sycamore would be the exact focus of Serena’s ire in either situation, because they’re the ones who should have known and would be in a position to intervene.  And they didn’t.  They’ll leave it to her, and tell her she did a good job, but don’t really support her beyond platitudes.  Shauna and Calem at least showed up at the end.  Tierno and Trevor could be forgiven for not being battlers, but where were the adults who knew this guy and could’ve done something?  To Serena’s mind, if they’re not doing anything, then they don’t care.  Maybe they don’t care about her.  Maybe all she is to them is the person fixing their problems.  It may not be true, but what proof is there to the contrary?  When have they stepped up?

I think it does take until Masters for that to happen.  I don’t think Sycamore and Diantha actually don’t care, but it’s the perception behind it.  Sycamore couldn’t face his friend, but in avoiding that confrontation, left it in the hands of the children he set out to explore the world.  Diantha isn’t strictly beholden to solving these problems, and depending on the nature of her role, may not have been able to intervene when she wanted.  But all the kids see is that she never showed up.  And I think that’s interesting.

But moreover, I think it’s really the friend group that has the most significance, because they’re around.  I think the big deciding factor is whether Serena continues to appreciate them or not.  Recognizing their contributions, even if they were substantially less than her own, at least maintains the idea that others are helping.  Others care, and are trying.  They’re the last holdout against the belief that your actions alone matter, and that everything falls to you to solve.  That you can still rely on others.  That there’s someone there.

And if your response to their presence in the final showdown was that they’re just annoying and in the way?  Maybe Lysandre’s gambit worked better than you thought.

[garetlomodag]

February 2023: Too fast, too curious

What a month!

I’m surprised I still found time to craft this. Well, I’m doing something new. Instead of just doing it in one go, I decided I will do it in tranches. I will just keep on building on it until I finish the whole thing.

So, waddup February?! If you read my Jan post, you would know how I dread this month. 😂 but going into the whole month, wow did it escalate on a different level lol haha

It’s a month where I got reminded of the things that truly matter to me, and things that are all just fleeting and meaningless.

Don’t get me wrong, I know what matters already. I just wanted to wander and push limits again 🤣, as a stubborn, (feeling) willful person.

I had a lot of mishaps this month actually. From getting wasted (with only a little over a week in!) ➡️ series of catcalls while running (which reminds me, I need to report them) ➡️ crazy, messed up schedules (talk about overlapping appointments for work and personal) ➡️ unfortunate wardrobe malfunctions (good thing it happened discreetly) ➡️ almost ran out of gas #NeverAgain 🥲 ➡️ almost cut people off (bec yikes 🤢🤮)

Didn’t think they’d all lump together this month HAH! But hey, I still had some great stuff this month too! Got to catch up with long time friends ➡️ took a break from unnecessary activities ➡️ fambam time ➡️ took a break from (select) people hehe that did not last long lol ➡️ went on a quick vacay

But in a nutshell I got reminded of/learned these things:

1. Life is fleeting. It’s not about going YOLO, but it’s about living for what truly matters. Cry for the right things. Give more headspace for eternal things. Throw away 🤮🤢

2. People will disappoint — so don’t put them on a pedestal. gaaahhh I always need to be reminded of this. I’m always all-in, so if I trust you, I trust you. But sometimes I forget that we are just humans. And people can change, people can choose to live/think differently. And it’s okay. You can still choose to love them the same.

3. I like clear intentions (in all things, at all times). I only realized now that it matters to me so much. Thanks to running for my aha moment. Now it makes more sense why I always use this line: “simple lang naman ako. Just be upfront with me so I can make informed and sound decisions.” So now that I am more aware, I hope I will choose to veer from anything unclear. Cos honestly, anything puzzling sucks the life out of me.

4. I am not (yet?) ready. This is #TMI, but I got asked several times this month (by some interested, and some random people): “are you ready to get married this year?” My reaction? I got scared..like my heart was about to burst. I didn’t know how to respond and honestly I still don’t know. Hindi ba pwedeng hinay hinay lang? This year agad?! So now, if I get asked again, my next default answer will be: “I will cross the bridge when I get there.”

5. Choosing discipline is hard. It’s not always fun and will-based. Like when I run, sometimes I really need an extra push (literally and figuratively) to get myself off the bed and run like a horse with blinkers.

Some big stuff, February! 28 days felt so jampacked and character-stretching.

Although I must say I am also excited for a few things this March:

1. Even though I feel like I’m lacking time, I am going to push for my 1st run deadline by the end of March. Accckkk so help me God

2. Rebuilding old accountability groups from church and personal circle, but also developing new ones :) Oh so grateful that from season to season, God surrounds me with good and wise counsel. 🙏🏼

3. Once I finish March, I am shifting to another training set for my next 15/21km target. (Lord, pls help me)

Grabe, it’s just month #2 and 2023’s stepping up its game already. 😂🙄 I remember the Death Crawl scene in Facing the Giants movie. I take inspiration from this line: “You’re gonna give me your best.” Aye aye! 10 more! Let’s go!

Watch the scene here: https://youtu.be/SpdLC4RdJTg

[artandprotest]

Latrell Boddie's art Blog (12/13/22)

As the class and the overall semester comes to a close, I found the class to be as fun, interesting, and thought provoking as I thought it would be. Hence one of the mains reasons for me choosing this class. With what we learned in class and done in the activities, the assigned readings, and assignments to do at our own time, I have learned of the many interesting pieces of information and ways art, activism, and protest have intertwined to spread a message or make a change. One of these that was interesting to me and left a lasting impact on me was when each of us made a Zine, short for fanzine, dealing with the issue of women’s rights and many feminist issues.

            From what we learned in class Zines are typically distributed to specific groups in small numbers, are self-published, are free or inexpensive. They also allow people’s previously unheard voices to be better heard, while also giving a viewpoint outside of mainstream media, which they are meant to do. While doing this assignment, and even after when reflecting, I found it interesting how all this connects to the issue of women’s rights and my role in making this type of art. This is because on one hand the issue of women’s rights is such an important issue to many people and many have had their voices heard. So one part of me felt like what thing new was I bringing to the table to help for the fight. But after doing the project and reflecting on the women’s rights issues the zine I made dealt with I realized that it can help spread my views that can help the movement. Perhaps even spreading it to the wider world.  

            After doing the project, and having reflected upon it after completing other assignments, I also found it interesting how the point of a Zine: to express ideas, connect people, spread information, it allowing previously unheard voices to be heard, and what we did for the class activity was similar to what my presentation about Aretha Brown discussed. In the case of Brown, much of her work deals with the struggle of Aboriginal Australians rights, and the struggle to be heard. Hence why my presentation discussed heavily about this and asked questions about this. When looking back and reflecting, there are connections and similarities in what Zins and Brown are attempting to do and what their strategies are to do so. That being, to spread a previously unheard message to a wider audience. However there are also differences such as with Zins being distributed to specific groups in small numbers, while Brown tires to get large crowds and as much people as possible.

            With all this in mind, and having reflected, I found having to create the Zine for women’s rights to have been fun, though provoking, and eye opening. From it, I realized this can also be useful for me in the future. I have always been interested in politics, history, and art, so in the future I can possibly use this art to spread my message, not just for the issue of women’s rights, but many. I am very thankful for being introduced to this form of art and protest.

[sixthwater]

Hi! This was a requested topic from a follower quite a bit ago, but due to some life restrictions I was unable to get to it until now. You may ask 'why are people attracted to me', but I asked what your attractive qualities are in general

(Left → Right / Pile 1 → Pile 4)

Decks Used: Tarot of the Divine, Archetype Oracle, Traditional Manga Tarot, Arcana of Astrology Oracle, believe in your own magic Oracle

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Pile One

Personality: Ace of Swords Rx, II of Wands Rx, Seeker (Shadow)

There’s a bit of fogginess present which makes me think of how people with Piscean energy tend to space out or get caught in their thoughts. It’s not a confused energy, but it’s how your brain is working so much, having an active imagination or very present thought process. The Two of Wands can stand for messy plans but it’s really not that I’m getting chaos or being unprepared, it’s more like an active energy, very excited and bouncy but it’s not loud like a fire sign. Also now that I’m realizing, I already forgot to get your archetype so how fitting. Aaannndd you would not believe it: Seeker in the shadow trait which says, “Inability to commit to a path once found”. It reminds me of Mutable energy overall, if I want to be specific then Gemini, but it’s the idea that there are a lot of neat and interesting things out there and you just don’t want to miss it. Due to this, you have a lot of facets that have been unlocked and you’re a very interesting person to talk to. You can be approached by a lot of people because you take interest in a lot of things. Now promising that you’ll be present, or you won’t be distracted mid conversation? That’s hard to say, but you can hold people’s attention, or have very intriguing ones because they don’t just die out. I like the art on the the Two of Wands because that’s what it feels like quite literally in your mind sometimes. You want to go in both directions at once, like you wish you could split up and then reconvene and share the stories between your ‘two experiences’ afterwards. Really strong Gemini Moon vibes but really it’s still just Mutable overall. Honestly some Aquarian / Air energy overall because there’s a feeling of being a ditz on the surface but you are very complex and intelligence underneath, there’s just some difficulty in taking all your thoughts and making a coherent or cohesive sentence with all of it. Regardless, everything in the world seems fun to you, and sometimes this can lead to a bit of decision paralysis because everything seems so tantalizing, but this tends to draw people in.

Physically: King of Wands Rx, IX of Wands Rx, Temperance Rx, Chiron, Eris

Interesting and Fun! You know how they always talk about how you can spot an Aquarius placement from a mile away? That’s you. There’s a chameleon? Lizard? There’s a reptile sitting on the King’s shoulders, the guy in the Nine of Wands is decked out in feathers, and Temperance is reversed. Whatever you choose to go out in, you wear it loud and proud. There’s a three different ways this is coming out. For the first group; there’s specific jewelery you like to wear or you like tattoos or piercings/jewelry that isn’t subtle. So, according to societal standards: septum piercings, full sleeve or back tattoos, gauge earrings — stuff like that. On the flip side it can also be a cherished necklace or accessory that you’re always seen with regardless of wardrobe, or you happen to dye your hair a lot (or your chosen colors are very striking). For the second group, you make sure you stand out, but in a more subtle way. It’s like everything that’s put together for the outfit is chosen very carefully, but in a muted sense. So you still fit in with the colors of the season, you’re not being brazen, but you make sure you can catch people’s eyes with the way you fit into the outfit or that when the outfit all comes together, it’s a statement or it’s definitely A Look for the gram (the type to dress up decently for a late night snack run). For the third and last group, it could simply just be that you’re a minority in your community. So someone black growing up in a community that’s mainly white, which will make you stand out. From the amount of intense rock songs that started to play as I got to this part, I’m thinking the majority of you will resonate with the first section, or eventually want to shift your style to that. Regardless, you are someone who wants to be known for you, it’s not really about being different, but you don’t like watering yourself down to being accepted by others. Which I think is so interesting because with these messages we have two Conflicting ass asteroids: Chiron and Eris. I believe you have to have some dreamy or bright eyes, or a bright smile. There’s also the feeling that when people see you presenting yourself as authentically as you please, it gives them some comfort that it’s not as embarrassing or as bad as it might be? Like they’ll stick out like a sore thumb and people will mock them for it like they’re cringe or something, but that’s not the case. So you help soothe other people’s worries even if they don’t actively tell you. I’m really getting the eye or smile feeling though. Like when you interact with others it’s really contrasting to the intense nature of your looks. Eris backs it up though that like, you do have an intensity about you at the same time. It’s not intimidating but it’s more like. You are who you are and no one can take that from you. Which is really neat. The girl in Temperance and Chiron really back up the energy felt within the first section though that there’s this somewhat soft and explorative energy to be sought within you. There’s also a chance of having a generational planet within your first house as strangers might sense some familiarity within you even though there...won’t actually be any.

What Do Strangers Find Attractive About You: Lavender — Surround Yourself With Love

Exactly!!! I think it’s quite obvious that you don’t associate with people that make you feel less than. You’re not one to quickly judge others and you give everyone a bit of a chance, but if people don’t extend the same openness and warmth to you then it’s over. Like I said, you’re quite sure of yourself and you don’t waste your time on people who want you to abide by their rules if it means abandoning parts of yourself. Iconic as the kids say.

Also! So many reversed cards, it’s like an active ‘I’m standing out I’m gonna be me’ statement it’s really cute!

Songs: Born For This – The Score, Big Yellow Taxi – Counting Crows, Beautiful Bride – Flyleaf, F**K You – Sleeping With Sirens

Pile Two

Personality: VI of Wands Rx, VIII of Pentacles, Child: Magical

A quiet hard worker. Someone who is okay with blending into the background and let’s their work speak for itself. It’s crazy how in sync all of these cards are because the princess in the Eight of Pentacles is sworn to silence until she is able to finish making the sweaters required or the curse will never be lifted (despite the toll it’s taking), the warrior in the Six of Wands is being rewarded for stepping from under her father’s light and making a name for her own (but it’s reversed), and the magical card talks about being enduring and always seeing the light within the most mundane and even in the worst of times. Being able to see the good end despite what’s happening. You are someone who is very co-operative with others, and I’m getting a strong sense of loyalty. It’s not undying, nor is it foolish, but it’s like...you don’t feel the need to always be the star of the show. Strong Virgo energy, that’s all that’s coming through. Also a very quiet pile as well. It’s a feeling of what you have you always share with others. There is a lack of ego, but it’s not concerning? You are a hard-worker and you always make sure whatever you’re putting your effort towards (relationships, projects, hobbits, etc) turns out polished and full of love, but you don’t need to be praised for it because it’s expected in your eyes. Considering that this is what’s attractive, you are really appreciated by those that know you. They realize that you’re a catch and no one puts in the work like you do. Especially unprompted. I keep glancing back at the princess crying in the Eight of Coins and the only thing is that you raise other people up while you— ah yes the song that’s playing. You support and raise others up but you shy or run away from the same thing, or you shrug it off as if you don’t need it. So people tend to see you as someone very strong and indomitable but you are still human so please be vulnerable so they can send that love right back when you need it. I also kept fighting the urge to go back and Actively work on Pile One, since I usually just go and make final changes once I’m done the entire thing, so please don’t be afraid to take up space or soak up the limelight guys.

Physically: The Devil, X of Swords Rx, Aquarius, Neptune

A lot of things are coming in so some might resonate or it might not. A good lot of you might have chosen this pile because the cards are very excited to talk, but I also think that you guys just don’t get the chance (choose) to vent a lot. So immediately I get the feeling that you might have a visible scar or birthmark. Doesn’t have to be big but it’s a ‘cute little quirk’ or defining feature. There’s something with the back that people or someone really likes regardless of the other messages I’m trying to talk about with this card because I keep coming back to physical traits. Those little angel wing tattoos? That people get on their backs are coming up as well. Anyway, you’re not how you appear is the second main message. Some might look at you like you’re a fallen angel (I always think of a back-stabbed angel with this card for some reason) who could solve all of their problems. Like you’re really innocent, but of course as we know your personality isn’t necessarily like that. It’s a calm muted energy but you’re not just an innocent dating sim NPC. You can come off as tantalizing to some people, or like it’s addicting to be around you (as in you have a fun energy), but I mainly get the feeling that you mirror people. In a way that you match whatever vibe is being thrown at you. Again, you really fall into the background by choice most times, so matching the energy levels would make sense because it’s along the process of making sure others are comfortable. There’s a feeling of containment, especially with expression, but sometimes your authenticity can come through. It could be that you maybe decorate your bag or desk with little objects of your liking so people can pick up on your personality, but I feel like it’s more tiny slip-ups.

What Do Strangers Find Attractive About You: Grey – Endings are Inevitable

You’re a realistic person. You’re the friend who helps ground others but not in a pessimistic sense. It’s more like; yes it’s going to rain, and it’s going to be cloudy for a couple of days, but then the sun comes out and then we get to go for a walk again. People like that you can balance coming off as practical while still being a sweetie and idealistic. This is such strong Sixth house energy it’s kind of crazy. There is a high chance that many people come to you for advice, or see you as somewhat wise—someone who has a lot of resources saved or has a lot of life experience. I will say that maybe this energy is currently happening because young forever started playing as I got this song so I hope you guys treat yourself kindly throughout this process.

Songs: Nesshoku Starmine – Roselia, This Day – Jingle Jangle (The Musical), Calm Me Down – American Authors, Life In Color – OneRepublic, Young Forever – Nicki Minaj

Pile Three

Personality: The Lovers Rx, V of Swords Rx, Midas / Miser

Oh no a goofy pile. Before I explain that, I immediately got independence and knowing when to walk away from disputes or a difficult situation. You use your wit, charm, and knowledge to avoid getting yourself into situations like those of the Five of Swords. The downside of this is that you don’t seem the most open or friendly? To be fair, when people think of ‘friendly’ they think of customer service friendly and chatty. You are quite smooth and flexible—you know how to work a crowd or your ‘audience’ when you need to and then you usually go into hiding right afterward. It’s funny because to strangers it’s like ‘ooo this person is strong and independent they don’t need anyone’ and you know how that draws people in, because they want to be the one person that you bend to. However from your end you’re just quite literally kind of introverted. You don’t really need to always be around people, if you’re around people then cool, if you aren’t then cool. You don’t feel strongly one way or the other, it kind of depends on the day lmao. So you probably have your Sun opposing your ASC, or strong energy in your Tenth that’s blocking out your personal planets or more muted placements that displays how you truly come across. People take delight in speaking to you or hearing your ideas because you’re ingenius and also just really funny? Quite literally if you look at the Midas / Miser card that’s how you come off. In public or when you’re flexing your abilities, you come off as the blonde (?) one. When you’re able to retreat you immediately start acting like the guy at the bottom haha. Also. Slime by Danny Gonzalez immediately started playing when I pulled your cards and if you’re not familiar, it’s a song poking fun at how adult youtubers who make very specific content for children have to navigate their lives offline which...was way too on the nose for this.

Physically: Page of Wands, King of Wands, Lunar Eclipse, First House

Oh you’re lying!!!! I was thinking about this when looking at The Lovers card but I always think of interracial couples because it’s represented by Beauty and the Beast, so with it reversed I was thinking “oh they’re probably conventionally attractive but that doesn’t really matter right now” but apparently it did!!! I guess so because I brought up the ASC up there but whatever!!! With the First House yeah I feel like either a Venusian or Scorpio Rising? I also keep thinking of Sagittarius thanks to these Wands but I’m putting that on pause and saying Jupiter/Venus in first. Venusians are usually the rising signs that people see as conventionally attractive, not because they are, but because of how they carry themselves and interact with others, there’s less of a push back on them. Scorpio Risings have that previous impression of “oh you’re not talking therefore you are alluring”, and people just enjoy the jovial energy of a Sagittarius rising. There’s just something about the way you present yourself that draws people in. I’m not really getting the way you dress with this pile, it’s more about the way you carry yourself. The Lunar Eclipse is definitely giving me this ASC-Opposition feeling. It doesn’t have to be the sun, but a very important planet (chart ruler or the moon) is being masked by your rising. It’s giving me strong Seventh house vibes though because that always deals with the “omg I didn’t know you were like that” “I literally said this five days ago” frustrated feeling. I think people enjoy getting to know you though because it’s refreshing? You seem very routine-based to them so when they get to see you act outside of that it’s very exciting? Now these wands...lost my mind. One part of it is that I think people enjoy seeing you grow. You’re never halting your progress and you always like to expand your knowledge or ‘business’ (idk why I keep using business as an example///). However for others, you just have a very light-hearted and free-spirited energy and a very good song came on for this! You’re never too bothered about appearances yeah. Both court cards look very extravagant but when you look closer it’s just kind of...it’s just some fabric. You might also have an ‘unsual’ pet. It’s not exotic or anything but it’s not someone’s first choice so think like ferret, birds, snakes, etc. Due to that, it’s not a forgettable quality.

What Do Strangers Find Attractive About You: Castle – It’s Time for Healing, Not War

You give good advice. You’re a little different from Pile Two in regards to this. People already seek you out for your charisma, but this is an unexpected element in the interaction. During conversations and interactions, you throw in little examples of your experiences and people begin to realize there’s a lot more to you. I think that’s why people enjoy when you peel back a bit of those layers because it’s a nice change. People seek you out for a lot more than the usual, because you have more to give than just your regular brand, whatever it might be. They enjoy just. Talking to you to be honest. I’m not sure how many realize this, but you’re not a perfect person. You are not an angel here to spread whatever gospel every other person is always trying to preach as if they’ve never done anything bad in their life, which is really nice to interact with from time to time. Also I don’t know why I want to say this but you can be a little blunt at times too, which can be funny.

Songs: Slime – Danny Gonzalez, Kyouran Hey Kids!! – THE ORAL CIGARETTES, Blowback – The Killers, smiling when i die – Sasha Alex Sloan, Nobody’s Home – Avril Lavigne, Tongue Tied – Grouplove, Spectrum – Florence + The Machine

Pile Four

Personality: X of Wands Rx, Knight of Wands, Knight

So interestingly enough, I was almost immediately denied access to get your cards, but obviously I’m here so I was let in, and then I get all these cards as well as your first song lmao. So quite the dramatic change. Your pile has such a light-hearted energy. I want to say pile because I. Feel like the authenticity is a bit protected right now lol. So for right now, the pile is giving off some fun and light-hearted energy. It feels like playing pretend, like if you look between the two knight cards (ironically), it reminds me of kids laying down their rules and making up their world and someone is going to go save the princess. There’s an romanticism of love movies and scenarios—it’s a very pure and cute energy. It’s not soft though, it’s very loud and brash almost. Your pile doesn’t like dealing with pessimism, or I should say they don’t believe that life or love has to be hard and heavy or deep. Not in an immature way, but like you can have a happy and breezy time while still be undying and intense like the way media always tries to talk about love. There’s a reckless side of your pile too that can be quite obnoxious. I always take this Knight of Wands card to be a bit loud and a sign of someone not knowing when to shut up because of it’s story haha. It’s also an energy of someone who isn’t afraid to go against the grain and be themselves. I feel like people are expecting the prim and polished personality and appearance of the first card, but what they get for life is the second knight card. Both are cute but the second one is just a lot more to handle when it’s unexpected, however both are true to who you are. Giving big Leo energy.

Physically: IX of Wands Rx, X of Pentacles Rx, Full Moon, Gemini

I’m not taking it for your song, but Dangerously In Love by Beyonce is playing right now. I think you really captivate people by your dualistic nature, but at the same time you don’t...it’s a bit difficult to explain. So there are different sides to you, but they’re both authentic. You’re not putting up a front, it’s just that sometimes one is more prominent than the other or you’re just feeling that mood more than the other. It’s not something you really hide either, like if you pay attention to conversations or details, it’s very clear that both the prim and proper knight as well as the rowdy knight are both you, and that bleeds over into your appearance as well. It’s weird because I need to interpret this Ten of Pentacles in both ways. The Nine of Wands just completely stands for you not really caring about appearances. Fully. It’s not something that you really give much thought unless you’re kinda forced to, which brings us to our Ten. On some days, you are looking Extravagant very put together 10/10. It could be that your outfit fits your style and look perfectly, or it’s for an event, etc. However sometimes there will be a few things out of place or maybe it’s like a bit messy—feels like those like ‘messy bun’ hairstyles? Due to the influence of this Nine of Wands. Then on other days you just go back to be completely natural full on sweatpants no attempt at wardrobe—complete contrast to what people are imagining in their head. I don’t know why I get the sense that people don’t immediately meet you first before they get to know you lol. However the way you can just jump from both ends of the spectrum at random moments and still look pretty good is really impressive to people.

What Do Strangers Find Attractive About You: Escapist – Come Home to Yourself

Yup! You have a great imagination and you don’t stress the practicality of it all. I don’t really get that you avoid things too much, even though this card does warn of it, but this is one of your strengths. You enjoy having a good time, and you encourage those around you to de-stress and just do something they enjoy every once in a while (or thrice in a while, fuck it). People are drawn in by that charismatic nature you have quite easily. I’m going to sound annoying, but I think just being careful balancing Fifth and Sixth house energies (so hobbies in contrast to stuff like daily chores) will give you a pretty strong mindset.

Songs: DOLLA SIGN SLIME (feat. Megan Thee Stallion) – Lil Nas X, Just Around the Riverbend – Pocahontas (Movie), Alive – Krewella, I’m Like a Lawyer with the Way I’m Always Trying to Get You Off (Me & You) – Fall Out Boy

[will-o-the-witch]

I'm part of several magic geared discords run by popular youtube practitioners (tried smaller ones but they were somehow more awkward) and when I first started getting into magic 8 or so months ago they felt like such a boon. So many books to look into, so many resources for who to avoid, so many people to learn from. But as time went by I started to feel really awkward and couldn't put my finger on it.

Recently though I've started to realize that there's a lot of performative activism in the groups. Lots of Heathens will make giant posts, cut people out(nike and georgina rose), make podcast episodes about how horrible white nationalism and na*is are, but then when someone pops on to ask about Lilith, these same people talk about how she's so powerful to work with and all this (legit one of the mods across 3! severs is a host for a heathen podcast and said she grew up in a Jewish household and she doesn't care if people worship Lilith because no one she knew ever cared). People go out of their way to be respectful to Indigenous practices (mostly in regards to land spirits and white sage) but there's not a lot there to help bring attention to the rampant anti-Semitism in magic spaces.

They constantly publicly shame people who share their UPG while also suggesting books that are by and large just the authors UPG. (Or low key really appropriative but somehow it's okay because they are so popular *cough Jason Miller cough*) The same mod as I mentioned above has gone on long tirades about how if you say something is part of your practice you NEED to have *facts* that back it up, but the facts she wants are like random correspondences from a book she "trusts" (honestly, if we're not talking 100% historic stuff what facts are there most of the time? (and even then history isn't static and changes based on new information))

My question is how would I even start a conversation (if I choose to, which tbh probably won't but it'd be nice to know what to do about it in the future) with people like this? These people think anything not in a published book aren't worth looking in to. Anyone from tumblr/tik-tok/instagram is considered a joke regardless of how good their information is (which is hilarious because these people mod on discords for youtube witches). I'm starting to realize this is just a really common thing and I don't know what to do. You seem to have a lot of (probably unwanted) experience with this kind of stuff and I don't want to leave the discords because there is some good information if I dig. It's just getting harder and harder not to say anything when people do icky stuff.

This is a great question!! Unfortunately performative activitism and anti-intellectualism can worm their way into any community space, but I think the latter tends to hold firmer in magic/mysticism spaces because it's been used to try and justify SO much pseudoscience(which feeds back into it) and magic work is so esoteric and subjective anyway that so much information can't ever be formally verified.

I think the best thing you can honestly do is just rise above it. Be picky about your sources (I usually don't touch a book on magic with less than 3 pages of works cited,) study your history and science, read original sources when you can, etc. Not only will it help you out personally but you'll be better equipped to point out WHY something is bullshit if you need to. (And reminding people that Llewellyn and other publishing companies don't necessarily have a quality standard, it's about whether they think a book will sell enough copies.)

Leading by example and speaking with confidence is good, but you also don't have to rot your brain trying to change every mind. Some people aren't interested in being corrected, and you don't have to make them their problem. If a group is frustrating and draining to you, just leave! Find your tribe of like-minded folks who have the same values as you. They're out there, sometimes it just takes hunting!

[arty-shadow-morningstar]

A Failed Betrothal (5)

This is going to be the last part I am going to post in a while. My school is finally starting up again and I am sure to be swamped with homework. Without further ado. Enjoy ❤

[Masterlist]

(Part 1)(Part 4)

-----------

Damian laid in bed, thinking about the recent turn of events. Lady, who told them that they can call her Marinette since they might as well get acquainted while the Waynes were in Paris. She had found out Jason’s identity after a few google searches and by extension, the rest of the Bats while they both were taking a shower. It had taken a few arguments and one sentimonster attack that cut one of the arguments short to trust the Dupain-Chengs with their secret identities. His bride was apparently a superhero too. Has been for a few years. In a different world, he might have actually dated her out of his own free will and fought crime with her together.

Damian shook his head at that thought.

That was the curse talking. Get a hold of yourself, Wayne. Resist. Don’t think about Marinette and her blue eyes.

Back to the akumas, Paris had been under the control of a magical terrorist for years. Lady Noire, formerly known as Ladybug, formed a team to battle against him. He also found out about the Guardian who chose Marinette and someone else, who wasn’t spoken about much except that his name was Chat Noir and she now wields his ring temporarily, to fight against Hawkmoth as partners. The same Guardian that promised her hand-in-marriage in exchange for protection from the League of Assassins. Sabine, the Blue Reaper, had to be restrained from killing the old amnesiatic man by her bear of a husband who was reluctant to do so and also wanted to help her.

Hawkmoth also had a partner who went by the name, Mayura, with a power similar to his and could create sentimonster out of negative emotions. Their top suspect was Gabriel Agreste, with much evidence pointing his way but they had difficulty trying to confirm it and had the time to gather evidence to do it. The local authorities were helpful but getting a search warrant for a famous, rich designer who was a known recluse with circumstantial evidence is not possible.

After informing their father of their kidnapping and the situation in Paris (and racking up the Dupain-Cheng's phone bill), they were told to stay there and help as much as they can. Tim, who was coming to Paris for a vacation (suspicious), got his plans hijacked and was now going to help uncover Hawkmoth’s identity.

When the Justice League had reached out a few years ago, they were rebuffed by the Mayor. Nightrunner got into contact with the one of the heroes, Ladybug who asked for a meeting outside of Paris with Wonder Woman and Batman came along, to assess her. They didn’t expect a young girl to be Paris’s heroine.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

3 years ago…

“Bonjour, Princess Diana of Themyscira, daughter of Hippolayta, it is an honour to meet you. And you too, Batman.” The spotted heroine greeted both of them with Nightrunner besides her. Their meeting point was in the gardens in the Palace of Versailles.

“The pleasure is all mine, Ladybug. But I am confused as to why you have refused the Justice League’s help.” Wonder Woman was worried that the Ladybug Miraculous was active again and for many good reasons.

“I would be glad for some help but Paris is run by an incompetent fool. He wants no one outside of Paris to think that the city is unsafe due to Hawkmoth and keep the tourism numbers high. The other reason is that my Miraculous Cure can restore any physical damages done during a fight and involving you might result in more damages than I could cure. But I also think it would be better if there were less powerful heroes in Paris, akumas amplifies one’s power and I don’t want to fight you after you had a bad day.” Ladybug explained. Nightrunner murmured in agreement.

“Do you know how Hawkmoth operates?” asked Batman. He had read reports of the situation but wondered the true extent of it.

“Have Wonder Woman explained to you about the Miraculous?”

He nodded.

“Hawkmoth has the butterfly miraculous, and it has the power of transmission. In the right hands, they would be used to grant ordinary people powers as the user’s champions. But in the hands of Hawkmoth, he targets people with high negative emotions, a girl after a bad break-up or a student with a failed grade. He grants them powers to use for revenge or some obscure version of justice. In return, he asks for mine and Chat Noir’s miraculous. With our two miraculous, he can make a wish but wishes always come with a price so it is best if we keep it out of his reach.”

“How have you not captured him yet?”

“Hawkmoth is a coward who rarely comes out to face us. I have never met him face-to-face. He uses people to get what he wants. Not very honourable. The Mayor has refused to help my attempts to stop him or prevent more akumas because his bratty daughter isn’t given a Miraculous to be a hero. I don’t have the time or resources because I am still in school and have other obligations outside the suit. I can’t tell my family and ask for help because the Guardian’s ,the one who gave me the Miraculous in the first place, secret identities rule and some magic thing that makes me unable to tell them.”

The adults were all horrified at what the girl was going through.

“We could help in other ways. Not fight the akumas but provide you the resources to track down and capture him. Do you have any training? From the footage we have seen, you know martial arts and how to use some weapons.”

“I was raised in a forgotten temple somewhere in Asia with brutal training everyday before I ran away. I met someone on my way out who took me in and adopted me.” She said it seriously enough that they have no room for doubt.

“Batman, she just said she was adopted. She may have the features but the answer is no.” Wonder Woman said with a knowing look in her eyes.

“I wasn’t thinking about it. She has a duty to Paris right now and I am not going to take away from her life here. I don’t adopt every black-haired and blue-eyed child I see.” Batman denied.

“I am confused.” Ladybug said, tilting her head.

“Batman here has a bad habit of adopting kids with a tragic past, especially kids with black hair and blue eyes.” Nightrunner explained to his fellow Parisian hero.

“Well, Mousier, you will have to fight my parents for custody. While I have training, Chat Noir doesn’t and he hinders the battles with his ‘help’. I would give him some but he sees them as dates even though I have told him it’s not.”

“His incompetence is a liability. Why is he your partner?”

“The Guardian chose him too like he chose me through some stupid trial I somehow passed the requirements for. I am just hoping that there is a really good reason for choosing Chat Noir. I have some questions on how you are-”

“Ladybug, what are you doing?” A sharp voice cut in. An old man who appeared to be dressed as a tortoise landed in front of them.

“Master Fu, this is Princess Diana of Themyscira and the world’s greatest detective, Batman. I am asking for their help in finding Hawkmoth.” Ladybug explained, confused why Master Fu looked upset.

“Ladybug, that was extremely foolish of you. This is a matter of the Order. You shouldn’t have involved other heroes in it. We can resolve this on our own. I apologize on behalf of her for wasting your time.”

“But, Master-” “We will talk about this later, Ladybug. You are young and don’t understand things yet.”

“Guardian, with all due respect, my mother was a Ladybug wielder herself and the Amazons will lend a hand to any miraculous holders in need.”

“It is appreciated but Ladybug, Chat Noir and I can do it on our own. Come along, Ladybug.”

“Let me at least apologize for my mistake, Guardian.”

“Very well. Meet me later.”

“I am sorry but it looks like I have to fight Hawkmoth without your help. That being said please don’t try to look further into Hawkmoth’s identity and leave any notes of your leads in the mouth of the gargoyle on the northside of Notre Dame where I usually rest after I finish patrol. Salut, Princess Diana, Batman, Nightrunner.” She left using her yo-yo to swing away after giving them a wink.

Batman smirked. He had to give it to Ladybug, she was clever and resourceful and Diana was right, he wanted to adopt her.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Present time…

(Words in bold are French)

Now that the previous Guardian was out of the picture, the Miraculous team would gladly accept any help they can get.

Damian and Jason had picked up Tim from the airport and they had already set things up in one of the Wayne penthouses in Paris. Less chance of nosy maids than in a hotel.

Bilal had already handed over all the evidence he could find. He was also one of the Miraculous team’s trainers when Sabine couldn’t make it. Jason and Damian were going to help in training and be back-up heroes when needed. (Bilal wore a miraculous once to help out. And that one time was weird enough to last him a lifetime and he was never doing it again.)

Sadly, all the magic users who were allies or part of the JL were busy with other missions or MIA so they couldn’t break Damian’s curse yet. Bruce didn’t see the problem with the curse so unless it causes major problems or someone is free to break it. They couldn’t go back to Gotham until they got the necessary things in order so it looks like they were going to be in Paris for a while.

The next morning, Tim was nowhere to be found. Because they were paranoid Batboys, they tracked his phone to see him at the Dupain-Cheng’s bakery with Marinette and a group of other people, having breakfast.

“There you are, Replacement.” Jason shouted as he entered the bakery, “So, this is where you were? I see you have already figured out who Ladybug is and met her.”

Marinette looked at Damian and Jason, then at Tim and back at them again.

Oh.

Oh.

She face-palmed as she connected the dots and realized what the nagging feeling she had around Tim was about.

“Oh my Kwamis, you are Tim Drake, adopted by Bruce Wayne aka Batman. Jason and Damian are your brothers. And judging by your build, you are Red Robin. I feel so stupid.”

Thankfully, there were no customers around yet to hear some of the world’s most important secrets being out.

“I am- We are not- Bruce isn’t- How?! How the hell did you find out? And you are Ladybug?!” Tim was floundering at Marinette’s words and the caffeine from his first coffee of the day hadn’t kicked in yet. He looked at her friends, who were looking at the Wayne boys with shocked expressions….and looked similar to the rest of the Miraculous Team.

The caffeine finally kicked in.

“Oh my God. I was talking to the entire Miraculous Team and I didn’t know it. That means Chloe Bourgeois is a hero. That bratty blonde I met as a child is a hero.”

“Speak for yourself, Timothy, my childhood friend is a hero too. I can’t believe we are all heroes.” Chloe said in total disbelief.

Introductions and alter egos were exchanged.

Nearly everything went swimmingly if it weren’t for Chloe jokingly elbowed Marinette and said, “You get to date a hero too. No need to worry about flaking out on dates.”

“What do you mean dates? Dupain-Cheng and I aren’t dating.” Damian said, “My mother wanted us to marry each other, not date.”

“Mari, looks like you need some explaining to do.”

Marinette gave the short story on how she met Damian and Jason.

“So you guys are absolutely not dating? Cool. Tim, are you still open to being Mari-bug's fake boyfriend?” Chloe asked. Tim looked at her incredulously.

“You called me all the way here to fake-date your friend. Why? Not that I am complaining about her or anything.” “There is this boy in our class, Adrien Agreste and he has a little obsession with Marinette.” Chloe explained. “Romantic Soulmates.” Nathaniel chimed in, doing air-quotes.

“So I volunteered on your behalf to be my best friend’s long-distance boyfriend in America who has video-call dates with her once a week. You are going to have little romantic dates coincidently where our classmates are going to be, especially Adrien. It might put him off from pursuing Marinette for a while. After you leave, we are just to mention you every now and then to prevent him from getting any ideas.”

Damian felt a hot, burning sensation in his chest and clenched his jaw at the thought of Marin- Dupain-Cheng holding hands, cuddling and doing all those romantic actions with Drake of all people. (No, he wasn’t jealous. Not at all. Don’t be stupid. )

“Tch, Drake is going to be busy trying to find Hawkmoth. He can’t go around Paris, being Dupain-Cheng’s boyfriend. Besides, he can’t be a proper boyfriend even in his most lucid moments. I will be her boyfriend instead.”

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(PART 6)