#also i lied there is one thing stopping me
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planetpedri · 3 days ago
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Could I please request Pedri with reader who is the daughter of Xavi (Hernandez) and then lots of fluff and this prompt "I bought you flowers"? Thank you!💖
Orange-colored day — Pedri González.
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Pairing: Pedri González x Fem!Reader
Summary: Throughout your father’s time coaching FC Barcelona, you and Pedri had a.. weird relationship. You flirted, hung out all the time, and occasionally came close to crossing the line that differentiated friends from lovers. But, despite all that, it never went further.. Until now! Because he was outside of your house with flowers in his hand.
Word count: 590+
Disclaimer/s: angst but only if you squint + fluff !
A/N: Happy birthday to the only man ever!! Pedri. Trust. I will have u.
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Pedri swayed back and forth on his feet, nerves bundling in his throat as he lifted his hand to knock on your door. It’d been months since he last saw you. After Xavi got sacked, he hadn’t heard from you. Not that it was on bad terms, you’d just started your third year in Uni and he was busy with the Euro’s. It didn’t help that your dad was leaving Barça under such circumstances…
The soft click that signaled you unlocking the door caused every nerve inside of Pedri, to spike. He gripped the bouquet harder, finding it hard to breathe.
It was even harder to breathe when he saw you. Your hair was in a loose ponytail and you were wearing joggers and a tank top—your homework outfit. He’d seen you wear it a multitude of times during your late night hangouts.
“Pedro?” You drawl out his name, eyebrows lifting in surprise. “What are you doing.. here?” Your eyes flicker down to the flowers in his hand, grinning at the jellycat bunny stuffed animal.
“I bought you flowers.” It came out as a question, which had a deep flush spreading across Pedri’s already reddened cheeks.
You chuckle, “I can see that. My question was, what are you doing.. here? At my house.”
Pedri was the one that stopped your situation in the first place. He said, ‘Your dad is my coach and it’s unprofessional.’ As if him staying at your house nights on end because he could only sleep through the night if he was near you, wasn’t already unprofessional.
As if his lips wouldn’t linger above yours fighting tooth and nail with his brain not to just kiss you, wasn’t unprofessional. You could go on, but Pedri was finally finding his words.
“I just—I thought that with your dad gone and i’m a little less busy now, and with that free time all I could think about was you—that maybe it was time I tried to fix things?” He speaks hastily, trying not to move his hands so he wouldn’t ruin the bouquet.
Your lips push out into a frown. “It’s golden hour.”
Pedri’s eyebrows scrunch together, lines creasing his forehead. “What?”
“It’s golden hour. Your eyes look really pretty during golden hour.” You explain softly. “It brings out the orange in them.”
The mans lips twitch. “Uhm, thanks? Do you want the flowers or..”
You gasp, reaching out to take the bouquet from his hands gratefully. “Yes! Sorry, distracted. Come in? I’m supposed to be—“
“Doing homework?”
“—doing-oh. Well, yes. But, I also was about to order dinner if you are hungry?” You lean against the doorframe, smiling up at the man whom you adored so deeply.
Pedri smiles, “yes, please.”
Stepping to the side, you make enough room for him to walk inside. “My dad asked about you the other day, he thinks we had a ‘falling out.’” You use air quotation marks as you walk inside and in the direction of your room with Pedri right behind you.
“That would be mostly my fault.” He laughs ashamedly. “I’m sorry about that.”
“Don’t be! I was busy too. What matters now, is that you’re here.” You glance back at him with a warm look, “you pick whats for dinner, i’ll hurry and finish my homework?”
Pedri nods in agreement, walking through your bedroom door, slipping his shoes off, and plopping down on your bed. “Sounds good to me.” Sliding back onto your desk chair, you open your laptop and get to work with a smile so big it hurt your face.
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likes , comments , and reblog’s are all appreciated. lmk if you’d like to be tagged in future pedri posts.
ᝰ.ᐟ tags @halfwayhearted @sakashq @hrts4havertz @joaoflms @spidybaby @gadriezmannsgirl @unx100to @st4rgirl-ellie
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hyog-blog · 2 days ago
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Fangs of Fortune (ep. 06 - ep. 07)
Uh, not Li Lun, out of all people, making everyone finally question why Zhu Yan actually killed Yichen's brother and all those people years ago. We know he lost control over his malicious energy, but why didn't anyone ask him why it happened? Come on, people, you seem to be so smart))
Well, Wen Xiao seems to be accepting enough to not care about what our gorgeous Demon Lord has done in the past, which is quite refreshing. Ambiguous, morally grey characters need more unconditional love (especially when they're, uh, 34,000 years old? XD). But he doesn't even seem to be so 'grey' at this point - he's doing too many good things right now.
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The whole thing with being a 'vessel for malicious energy' is quite intriguing. Was he born like that? Can he actually stop 'the cycle of rebirth'? Why did he 'lose control' after so many years of cultivation? I'm also trying to figure out the timeline - the killings must have happened after he dropped Wen Xiao off at what seemed to be the gates to the demon-hunting bureau. But she wasn't staying there when that stuff happened? Did his demonic self come back there just to wreak havoc or for some other reason? Was Li Lun involved? Mmmm, the plot is deliciously mysterious, I will have to wait to get those answers.
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Also, I can't even be angry with Li Lun at this point, although he's playing the bad guy now - the poor baby was so visibly hurt when Zhu Yan called him a scumbag. And that painful look he had when our Demon Lord thought something along the lines 'screw you, I know how to wake this boy up from his nightmare' and pierced himself with Yichen's sword (which, uh, seems to be quite a recurring motif and the symbolism of it isn't escaping me, nope XD). In the world of jianghu, the next best thing you can do to show you CARE apart from cutting sleeves is to stab (or get stabbed by) the person you care about. Or get stabbed FOR the person you care about.
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I also love how effortlessly Yichen is third-wheeling without creating a feeling that he's actually third-wheeling XD Wen Xiao is obviously biased towards Zhu Yan, now even more so that she knows he IS that Great Demon who accompanied her and the Bai Ze Goddess all those years ago. I would totally trust him, too, if I were her. I also love the messed-up dynamic of a former caretaker/child who's grown up because now Zhu Yan definitely doesn't give us those parental vibes, he's oozing sensuality wherever he goes (and him pretending to be all hurt so she stays with him, ahah, that whole sequence was cute and hilarious). And Zhu Yan saying something along the lines that they now get to 'meet all over again' - was it to build a new relationship with her from scratch? M-hmm, yummy, utterly delicious :D
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And you can see how Yichen kinda sorta admits defeat in the way Wen Xiao no longer needs his protection against the 'big bad demon' (the man is using his big bad demonic energy to push her swing, for Christ's sake XD), but still can't let the other man go so easily because of REASONS and that 'you'll have to pay for your sins either way' thing still going on between them. Zhu Yan does know what buttons to push when it comes to Yichen, but the feeling seems to be quite mutual (they're cute together and their interactions are so yummy 😍). That scene at the temple is EVERYTHING. And then at Zhu Yan's mansion with the swing. Is he swinging both ways? Ahah XD For a 34,000-year-old being I don't see how that could be an issue)))
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Okay, cutting and piercing still seem to be the show's love language and I APPROVE (never had a kink like that, but there's a first thing for everything, I guess XD). The undertones just make it all so yum))
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The introduction of the new character, Yinglei, was hilarious))) We also find out that the Wilderness is crumbling down, which makes the whole Bai Ze token thing even more important.
/and I've finally reached the picture limit in one tumblr post, ahah XD/
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furiousgoldfish · 4 hours ago
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I want to talk about a situation that happened when I was a kid, and even though this particular instance did not traumatize me (that I know of), it still deals with traumatic themes, such as physical abuse, attempted murder and severe neglect, so be careful if you're reading on! I'll explain at the end why I'm talking about it, and also psychoanalyze what I think was going on.
When I was about 6-9 years old, I had a strong conviction that my father was going to kill me. He would lock me into the basement and hurt me, and even though the injuries weren't lethal, I could feel the intent, he was out of control, not watching where he was hitting, if he was going to break my bones or not, it was erratic, terrifying. I love how I prefaced this with 'oh this didn't traumatize me' and then I started with that, but it's just the context to the actual story. That first part did probably traumatize me, I remember little of it.
Since I felt that my life was in peril, I decided, logically, that I needed to kill him before he kills me. It was justified I would defend my life with all I had. So I sneaked into the basement room, and searched for something that I could use for a weapon, next time he shuts me in there. I found one, memorized where it was, and then I was ready.
It came soon after, the event of me being alone with him in the basement, him out of control, attacking me, and again, I felt like I was about to be killed. So I grabbed a metal pole hidden next to the fireplace, used my full strength and hit him on the head with it. He fell down, and stopped moving.
I panicked then. He looked dead. I let myself out of the basement (I knew where the key was) and yelled for mother, telling her that I killed him, but I had to, because he was going to kill me. When we got back to where he was lying down, blood was trickling out of his nose. But my mother wasn't panicking like I was, she could probably see him breathing. Then he sat up.
I was even more scared then, because if he wasn't dead, then he knew I just tried to kill him, and would come after me even worse. But he didn't. He didn't even look at me. He wiped his nose, seeming completely calm, rage from before completely gone, talking only to the other family members, who seemed concerned about him.
I was told, that it's good for me that I didn't kill him, because had I done that, I would have been imprisoned for murder for the rest of my life. And other than that, everyone ignored me. Nobody talked to me, or had anything to say about the entire event. Father ignored me as well. I was not punished. Nobody was even mad at me. Nothing else was done.
The 'you'll go to prison forever if you kill him' line worked on me, because I didn't know the law, I didn't know that we don't incarcerate little kids; I was underage. They lied to me. So next time when he got me close to that feeling of 'I'm about to be murdered', I had no way to defend myself. If I killed him I would go to prison. I had no choice but to just let him do whatever and not retalliate in any significant way. Sad and painful.
Thinking back later on this event, it was bewildering to me that I was not punished whatsoever for a murder attempt, despite getting punished for bullshit like 'talking back' or 'having an unpleasant face expression'. This was common; I could be severely punished for leaving a door open, but when I did something big, like hurt a sibling, or threaten someone, or hit my father with a metal pole in the head, there was no consequences whatsoever, nobody would have even talked to me about it. I wondered if this was just because they loved that shit, they loved watching me grow into the same violent, brutal and sadistic person they all were, because then they could go 'you're no different than us', and be right. But, unlike them, once I knew something I did hurt another person, I wouldn't do it again; I did horrible things just because I was a kid, and all adults around me were horrible, and I mimicked them, as kids do. They wouldn't punish me for mimicking their awful behaviour because they approved of that, and they didn't care if my siblings were hurt because they loved hurting children anyway.
This also reinforces the theory that punishment is just an excuse to hurt a child, because these were the legitimate reasons to invoke consequences, but they never did, punishments were dished out when they felt like torturing someone and at that point, any face expression could have been an excuse enough. They didn't care about raising a kid or teaching them right and wrong, it was all just self-serving acts of sadistic pleasure.
But to let a murder attempt fly? I thought about it more today, and realized that maybe, they were shocked I did that. Maybe it was an unpleasant surprise to find out, that under severe stress, I would make an attempt at their lives. Maybe finding out that I just tried to kill one of them, made them not want to immediately try and do more violence to me. Maybe they were concerned that I injured their family member, and were more preoccupied with that. Maybe the logistics of 'this child just attempted to kill someone' made them slightly less secure in their 'beating children is normal and good' culture, maybe it signaled to them that beating children could be, in fact, a little dangerous. Of course this didn't make them not wanna do it, they just needed to persuade the child to take it and not retalliate, thus 'you'll go to prison if you do that', and afterwards they felt comfortable again, sure that justice is on their side. To make things more sinister, beating children was not even illegal in my country during that time, so what they were doing to me wasn't punishable by law. But if I retalliated, I was a criminal, according to them.
Hitting children did become illegal by the time I was 9, but conveniently nobody bothered informing  me, and I would live many more years in belief that violence towards me was normal, necessary and completely legal, hell I believed that even killing me was legal, because everyone was acting like it very much was and were threatening it left and right.
So the reason I'm thinking about this event, is that I just got some great news. My father has colon cancer. He's currently hospitalized about it. I don't know what stage it is, but the mortality rate for it is high. He might die. He might die.
I am overjoyed. I am hopeful, I am thrilled, I could not be more happy about this. What I started with that pole in the basement, might get finished. If he dies I am free. If he dies, my version of what happened is the only one to exist. I would be safe.
I think my reaction is interesting. Because I know other victims of abuse feel some sort of grief, some sort of pain and guilt for their sick or dying abusers, especially when they're parents, because of the parental bond, and trauma bonding, and victims generally having a lot of empathy and humanity towards abusers. Not me! Apparently my father managed to never even develop the basic parent-child bond with me, and I was ready to kill him by the time I was 6. What kind of shitbag human do you have to be so that your small child tries to kill you with a metal pole and when they hear you're dying, it's the best news of their life? That's such inhumane stuff that all my basic child instincts of attaching to my caretakers got overwritten by the necessity of protecting my life. You did it so badly you messed with human DNA there! Biological instincts voted against your parenthood! Self defense murder was invoked against you. You are ruled out as a bad parent and a life threat by my tiny child instincts.
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oifaaa · 1 year ago
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Doodling a little stephcass au and came to the sudden realisation that there's nothing stopping me from giving Tim the "female that gets in the way of a gay ship treatment"
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brighteuphony · 8 months ago
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Some reunions, like Naruto and Lee, are filled with happy hugs and warm welcomes.
Others...not so much.
Ino and Sakura's reunion...yeah it doesn't go great.
Sakura had been invited back into her mother's estranged family after her accident, but on the way through Tea Country, the caravan had been attacked by bandits/dissidents and Sakura ended up jumping into a river to save herself.
Her body was never found, and she was considered dead. She has an empty grave right beside her mother's and father's in Konoha.
Ino, Naruto and Lee were devastated. Ino, in particular, was inconsolable. She'd just made up with her friend and they'd been struggling to find footing after Sakura's accident, so to get the news of her death crushed Ino.
She'd felt so guilty, fighting over stupid things like boys, all the dumb insults they'd leveled at each other, and her helplessness at Sakura's condition ate at her for a long time. Ino threw herself into the job and she left flowers at Sakura's grave every Sunday for a year (and her parents did it for her when she was on missions) before finally beginning to heal.
To learn that Sakura was alive the entire time, that she didn't care enough to send Ino a single letter...that she just let Ino go through all that heart-wrenching grief is a betrayal that Ino can't suffer. It's like having that wound, only just now scarring over, be torn open and salted.
She spent a year mired in grief, and the next three trying to mend the hole Sakura's death left in her life. And to have all of that history, friendship and grief disrespected... Ino doesn't talk to Sakura for almost 7 months.
As for Sakura, she was in such a depression after her accident, she managed to convince herself that she didn't matter to any of her old friends (especially because it was so awkward and difficult to find common footing with everyone after being honorably discharged). So she made the mistake of assuming no one cared, almost as a method of protecting herself from the consequences of her own decisions.
This bites her in the ass, ofc.
Eventually, they enter a 'cold but civil' relationship when Sakura makes a sincere, heartfelt (and groveling) apology. After that, the walls come down, but their friendship won't ever take the same form as it did before, but maybe that's for the better.
Their new friendship is much stronger.
Once again, thank you so much to everyone for all the amazing asks and the incredibly kind words about this AU!
@evaregia
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benevolenterrancy · 23 days ago
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okay finished the first book of the fish isekai series and it is RIDICULOUSLY fun -- it's like eating candy, sweet and stupid and very hard to stop. prince jing is perfect, i adore him
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miguxadraws · 8 months ago
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more rat
i will try to control myself now i swear
sillies belong to @spitinsideme
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shannonallaround · 8 months ago
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After pondering on it for several days, I have officially decided I did not like the direction of KFP4 and have banished it from my brain. It is no longer canon. KFP4? What's that? Don't know what you're talking about.
#spoilers ahead#it wasn't all bad#I really truly loved the scenes with Li and Mr Ping they were wonderfully hilarious#and the music was great#BUT#I just did not like the direction they took Po's story at all.#and I'm kinda furious they subtly undermined Shifu's character#by making him “fine”/“not fine” with Oogway picking Po as his successor instead of him.#it was only a thing for 2 seconds for the sake of humor but it completely undermines his inner peace character development#first off why can there only be one successor#and second off why can't Po take primarily the fighting side and Shifu take the spiritual side#It FITS HIM#don't know if most people would notice that shifu's character was undermined but because he's one of my favorites I sure did and it HURT#also um the furious five WHY didn't we have them be the main characters with Po instead of the fox chick no one cares about#literally their interactions with Po that's WHY WE'RE HERE DREAMWORKS#also it's become really obvious to me that the fox girl was literally written just so they could cast a specific voice actress in a big rol#nothing against that actress I love her in other stuff but that was a bad move Dreamworks#and another thing#the movie's message about change not always being bad is perfectly fine and good in theory#but such character change is only satisfying from a storytelling perspective if the audience actually WANTS the character to change!!!#I don't WANT Po to stop being the dragon warrior! I don't WANT him to pick a successor! That wasn't satisfying!! like whyyyyyyyyy#Plus he's like way too young?? to be worrying about this??? Oogway didn't worry about it until he was literally 900 years old#Shifu is what in his 60s? 80s? and he hasn't picked one#why would they make shifu worry about po doing that any time soon literally at all#so there dreamworks#I banish this movie#I banish it for one thousand years#kfp4#kung fu panda 4#po kung fu panda
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arolesbianism · 4 months ago
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Despite how much I suffered making my last isat au Aris sprite redraw, I decided to do it again and once again went through hell doing it. There’s like a billion mistakes in this (such as her having the wrong arm rip) but at the end of the day I’m still happy with how it turned out :]
#keese draws#oc#oc art#eternal gales#isat#in stars and time#sorry for main tagging feel free to excecute me if you want or whatever#grips sink cringe is dead cringe is dead cringe is dead#anyways this is a very fuzzy and vague au as I don’t rly feel comfortable going off too hard with this one#this is pretty much entirely because I know I’d have to fuck around with the worldbuilding a decent amount and I don’t rly wanna do that#Isat’s worldbuilding is one of my favorite parts of isat so I don’t wanna fuck it up yknow?#I might do some other sprite redraws once I stop thinking too hard abt aris and tali#for context tali is the king aka complicated design that makes me wanna cry especially since I made it worse by changing her imagery#instead of having tears as a thing she has like. fracturing if that makes sense?#it’s supposed to be a nod to her ‘cracked’ eye in canon#she also has threads coming from her limbs instead of long hair for similar reasons#also she doesn’t have straight hair so yknow#but yeah for additional context aris and tali are half sisters and they make me go insane#in this au the idea would be that when their grandparents divorced when the two were little tali and their grandma left the island#aris wouldn’t leave until five or so years later when she was around 12#at which point the island disappeared and all that#the two have mostly completely forgotten about eachother but there still is familiarity between them#tali isn’t any less of a piece of shit than the king in this au tho#aris for a brief moment almost remembers who tali is during act 3 but she dies before she can fully grasp it#which almost hurts more to her despite not even knowing what she was trying to recall#during act 5 her inner sadness fight is against the hazy image of a very young tali 👍#just tiny 5 year old tali using the voices of the others to scream at aris that she’s been nothing but a burden to them all#and that she’s done nothing but hurt them in her selfish attempts to fix a problem that she refuses to admit she caused#and that time and time again she’s lied that she’s doing her best to protect them and that she’s failed all of them#it’s a mix of current guilt and her hazy but longstanding guilt towards tali
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dreadfutures · 2 months ago
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I love Solas, and I love Solavellan, because I find the character and story so compelling, but sometimes I feel like a fake Solavellan
to me Ixchel and Solas has kind of always been about two friends who both suffer from the same affliction and they are the only two people who can ever understand it, the affliction being outside (duty, responsibility, guilt) and inside (inherent fatalism in philosophy, viewing the self as unworthy, haunted by despair) and though
they can't at first forgive themselves or find the strength within them to stay out of their dark spirals, they can do it for the other. and how important that is. that's love. the smooching and everything is on top. the knowing what dark predators haunt the other person's psyche and saying I'll be there with you when the wolves come, we'll survive together. the I know exactly who you are and how ugly it is and I love you for it and I see the beauty still. the I will never get tired of you even if youre never "fixed." that's love right. that's Ixchel and Solas to me.
so like yeah they have been Together for about like 170+ chapters. they're not being tested about being pulled apart by duty or fear anymore, they're testing the strength of that bond in those dark ugly moments that come for us all. and mostly theyre good. mostly they're just on an adventure together.
somehow it feels like I'm a fake Solavellan 🥲 like early dpdf captured something and... getting together, having truths revealed, this *aftermath* is like I left that behind somehow. like it's beyond what Solavellans want. idk. I think about other fics that are post- truth coming out and staying together and they're very different vibes, I think, you know?
I like my action/adventure fic, I like them together, I like having moments where they find that there is still a dark corner they haven't swept out into the light yet and the way it's still scary for someone to want to know those ugly parts of you that they maybe haven't seen yet. I like having them be mostly utterly confident in each others competency. I like them united against the unknown together. but like did everything about them peak in Here Lies the Abyss, you know? or maybe Wycome? I'm so nervous about everything in TBG :'( it's just hard for me RN in my heart idk to feel confident of like. where it Fits into fandom besides "blue loves lore and wants to explore metaphysics with Ixchel (new perspective) and Solas (wise, experienced guide)"
ahhhhhhhhhhhhhh
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talentforlying · 9 months ago
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priest: i don't, ah, quite know what to say to you. if you are in such terrible danger, why are you taking it all so calmly? constantine: hmh! i dunno, father. i had a bloke beaten to a pulp earlier this evening. that sound calm to you? priest: you did what...? constantine: i must've been off me bleedin' rocker. i've never done anything like it before in me life, y'know?
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constantine: but there's header gets his guts blown out, and george is stickin' his head in the noose, and helen gets ... jesus, then friggin' sarah bites me head off — ! everything's coming to bits in me hands and it's so easy to just see red and now, shit, they could've killed the tosser for all i know! and now i'm just like the bastards i've hated all me life! kill him! fire him! close them down! piss all over him! screw you, i can do whatever i want! i so much as blink and you're dead, pal! i'm in charge!! ...
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constantine: 'scuse me, father. i'm always like this when i don't get me own way. — hellblazer #81, "rake at the gates of hell pt. 4"
babygirl you are just....so, sooooo offputting. (and grieving, and guilty, and terrified, but yeah: offputting.)
anyway, it's issues like this one that remind me why i kind of hesitate over some of the retcons in the recent spurrier runs, like the one with him now having opened dream's pouch of sand and stolen some before they even met. because like, it's easy enough to look at john constantine now — with 70 years of worst possible choices and unresolved trauma crystallizing underneath his skin to cover up all the soft, hopeful bits where he's used to getting hit — and assign him arbiter of ill intentions, magus of wasted potential, saint of shit choices, but man . . . he was new to this, once. he was still new to this 80 issues in.
80 issues in, and he's not used to losing friends yet; he even has time enough between catastrophes to grieve each individual one. still has enough left to live for at this stage to necessitate running and hiding, instead of bodily throwing himself at the problem like he learns to later, or sitting apathetically by to do nothing except smoke and watch the world fall apart when he finally gives up. fuck, he still apologizes.
and you're telling me this guy, this soppy wet cat motherfucker hiding from the devil in a church basement, so guilty over not knowing what happened to the guy that he paid people (paid chas, so chas could pay people) to attack that the bottle he's holding in this scene isn't even his second or third........this guy's past, more innocent self lied right to the face of DREAM OF THE ENDLESS and got away with it?
hm. i just don't know about all that.
#also this is where my headcanons tag is from <3#( ooc. ) OUT OF CIGS.#( visage. ) AND I'M A BASTARD.#( character study. ) A WALKING PLAGUE OF A MAN.#sometimes i just think that. people really like to reduce constantine down to one or two things#and somehow. after 250 issues of putting his life on the line bc he could never really make himself look away from people suffering#the soft sullen guilty person who wants so fucking desperately to be a better man? is never one of those two things#idk man. i think about this issue all the time#if i put these pages side-by-side with his grief in hellblazer 2? with his grief in hellblazer 213? 215? during the empathy virus arc?#it becomes CRYSTAL clear that the guy we know at the end of hellblazer isn't someone the guy who sat vigil for gary lester would recognize#in fact i think he's someone that hellblazer 81 constantine would fucking Hate#ANYway yeah. i don't think he lied to dream about the pouch. i don't think he ever got it open. i don't think that's canon for me#i want him to fucking Earn his asshole nature. the hard way. by making All The Wrong Choices that it took to get him there#he paved that road with good intentions himself but. he also used to remember the ones he started with#idk if i'm making sense but i have had this panel open on my laptop for Two Months now#bc i can never stop thinking about how fucking crushed he is here to realize that he might be exactly as bad a man as sarah said he was#and how little it will surprise him later on to learn that he is Easily capable of So Much Fuckin Worse#and with that your honor the defense rests. our evidence? just. just Look at this fuckin guy#scopophobia /#scopophobia#eye contact /#eye contact tw
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lurking-latinist · 7 months ago
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#after uh. not enjoying hornblower: loyalty all that much I finally watched hornblower: duty#and enjoyed it a lot more. I think there's meta there with mutiny/retribution#I gather they were sort of not allowed to mention kennedy but you know that makes sense in-universe.#horatio isn't allowed to mention him either. not really. and I do think he'd clam up about him. that's horatio all over#but you can't convince me that survivor's guilt of his is only over bracegirdle#(bracegirdle makes it worse obviously)#also his letting doughty off really makes me want it to have been him that pushed sawyer#I always want it to have been him just because so much of his later career either makes more sense or has additional dramatic irony#if he knows himself to be an unhanged mutineer#BUT he doesn't have to have actually done it. he just has to THINK he is guilty#for instance - recently aubreysmaturin made a pretty good case for it having been Wellard in the books#but if it's Wellard--then Horatio's gone down a path of 'I was his senior officer I was responsible to have stopped him I wanted Sawyer dea#so basically I am guilty' - because again that is what it is to be a Horatio Hornblower.#(in fact another clue pointing to Wellard is that the universe always seems to bend to keep Hornblower's hands clean#like that time he lied that the war was over only to later find out that in fact unbeknownst to him it was over.#he gets the thing he guiltily wanted and he gets it without actually doing the guilty thing and so no one will blame him#except his own conscience)#anyway that's the books. I don't think it was Wellard in the show#I'm not sure what I think happened in the show#but whatever it was Horatio *feels* responsible#I'm not saying that's *why* he let Doughty off but I think there's a kind of secret symmetry there#hornblower
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iq-m · 1 year ago
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Aromantic Shiina Mahiru. Thank you for coming to my ted talk.
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iniziare · 5 months ago
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While finally writing a thing, I suddenly remembered that I never shared (I don't think) when I HC Guizhong's birthday to be: the first day of each year, January 1st. Why? Well, I was thinking of the Guili Assembly, and how it seems really rather likely that it was created from the names that she and Morax, at the time, went by (not Zhongli, or... well, maybe that was exactly what he went by actually, come to think of it; why wouldn't he?) Which, to me, is further confirmed by the translation of the area's name's from the Chinese source directly. We have the 'Plains of Returning and Departing' (歸離原), which correlate with the meanings of a symbol in each of their names, the 'Gui' (歸) from Guizhong which means 'to return', and 'li' (離) from Zhongli, which means 'to depart'.
Now, regardless of the perceived nature of these two to others, I think saying that they're intertwined in stone (history) and memory either way, to hardly be far from a stretch at all. Now, keeping the above two translations in mind, and remembering that they put Zhongli's birthday in our western calendar on December 31st, I think January 1st would be a beautiful decision for Guizhong's. He represents the end of a fruitfal year, and she represents the start, or chance, of a new. I love the symbolism more than I can put into words.
#guizhong. [ many things only seem to surface beneath the moon's poignant glow. wherever its light shines; the heart is wont to follow. ]#guizhong: little notes. [ she always sought to make everyone happy and one must say: she had quite the gift for it. ]#speaking of-- of course when i speak of guizhong... i usually end up talking about zhongli as well but i do want to touch on it now.#people have gone 'okay but the name of the plains doesn't make sense... he went by morax! not zhongli!'#okay but guizhong also wasn't her /actual god name/ like morax was/is zhongli's name. guizhong's god name was haagentus.#guizhong was either a name given to her by her people (similar to 'rex lapis' even though that was more a title than a name i suppose)#or it was one that she took on. and THAT name was utilized from thereon out. which includes the guili assembly.#but look at the definitions of both names-- as in guizhong and zhongli and tell me that they don't match in numerous ways.#what if he actually /did/ go by zhongli back then? what stops him? it may be a name that withered in the ages. maybe it's one he let go of.#in the aftermath of her death and the guili assembly and returned to morax?#what if him using it now-- is possibly a callback? i mean /who would know/? and even if somehow it might've been remembered.#who would /ever/ make the connection?#instead of hypothesizing what name he might have used that contained 'li'-- why not... look at what's in front of us?#what if he picked that name because... it was already once his?
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science-lings · 8 months ago
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When Trucy moves out to go on tour and be an Adult I think that Phoenix would be so lonely which is his least favorite thing to be, and the best way to fix that is for him to adopt the meanest most fucked up asshole cat who becomes his best friend within a month. We already know it’s a big part of his personality to be like ‘I can fix them’ whenever he sees someone who needs help and gets a little depressed when he has to be alone.
He can’t stand the silence of an empty apartment so what better way to fix it than with a creature who will yell at him for the fun of it while eventually fulfilling his physical affection requirements after a long day of having a Normal job. He’s at his best when he has someone to take care of so what better than a ratty little kibby who needs to learn the power of love.
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questionably-audhd-oracle · 2 months ago
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I think one of the most interesting things I’ve learned about myself is that I’m always, constantly evaluating and reading into and analyzing what people say to me- listening for slight variances in inflection and tone that could change meanings and slight pauses or rushing or anything like that- because I’m so used to people trying to trick me with what they say. That sounds cynical (because it is) but like listen, I can’t tell easily when people are teasing or being real, I can’t pick up on jokes when the whole point of the joke is “I’m lying to you on purpose really well so you’ll believe me and look stupid” and I’m also used to being around mentally ill people who would tell me straight up that nothing was wrong and then get mad when I believed them; throughout my life in order to survive without being ridiculed or someone getting mad at me, I have always had to treat people like they’re liars. Nothing they say at face value is actually true unless I’ve vetted it thoroughly. If they say they’re fine, they’re not, unless I’ve vetted it thoroughly. If they say something with a slight sigh or downturned tone then there’s a hidden meaning. The problem with that is- no, people aren’t always lying to me. I can’t assume they are all the time, that’s hurtful and annoying. The other problem though is that it is frequent enough that I can’t get rid of that instinct altogether. So we’re back to square one. I will never be able to accurately assess which situations call for analysis, so I have to err on the side of caution and say they ALL call for it. That, or I risk constantly being called gullible and thought of as stupid and unaware and maybe hurting people’s feelings when I don’t get their hints.
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