#also i kinda had an idea for an episode but ill talk about that another time uwu
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I may have...mentioned a fankid a little while back (u_u*) here's the little squirt themselves, our very own Newt Utonium! The name is short for Newton, as in Isaac, who is often considered the grandfather of science (the professor's idea ofc) but they prefer to go by just Newt!
Just like their mother they came from an egg, which Blossom, Bubbles, and Buttercup were very excited and curious about! Especially since they were born 5 years old and at the same time, they were looking forward to interacting with a new sibling. And a baby at that! They spent a lot of time with the egg fawning over it, discussing what gender they hoped it would be and what they'd be like once hatched!
And ofc Utonium is just as wonderful a father with Newt as he was when the girls came into his life! 💖💖💖
Taglist♡: @me-myself-and-my-fos @tiny-cloud-of-flowers @sunstar-of-the-north @dearly-beeloved @adoredbyalatus @changeling-selfship @crushes-georg @miutonium @cherry-bomb-ships @rosieaurora @rejaytionships @sunlight1999 @in-true-blue-love @tropicalgothships (as always let me know if you want to be added OR taken off!)
#artfarts#self insert#self ship#self insert community#self ship community#self insert x canon#oc x canon#self insert fankid#fankid#professor utonium#ppg blossom#ppg bubbles#ppg buttercup#🔬 starkissed scientist 🔬#WAAHH 😭😭 IVE BEEN WANTING TO POST ABOUT THEM FOR A WHILE NOW#ive been having like 1 on 1 discussions with friends and my partner and stuff#but i love them so much 🥺🫶💖🫶💖🫶💖🫶💖🫶#you guys know im such a sucker for fankids!! and there's so much potential here#i think it kinda means a LOT to the girls that theres not one normal person in their family#i could go on about the existential loneliness of the ppg being the only BEINGS in the universe like themselves#but their new mom is an alien and their new sibling is HALF alien so theyre like...a little family of freaks ajfkf#and theyd be sooo excited to be the big sisters and have someone look up to them#not bcs theyre superheroes but because theyre the big sisters!!!#CRYING THROWING UP 😭😭#also i kinda had an idea for an episode but ill talk about that another time uwu#have this for now!!
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I. AM. WRECKED.
DRDT CCHAPTER 2 EXECUTION SPOILERS AND MORE
just watched drdt chapter 2 episode 16. you know what that means!! time for a rant!!
LEVI TAKING BULLETS FOR TERUKO??? I WAS SO SURE IT WAS GONNA BE ACE THAT DID IT AND HE CAME OUT OF NOWHERE
HE'S MY FAVOURITE I AM ACTUALLY SO WRECKED
also may make a seperate post about this but whit is WAY too chill. this is the first time we've seen him lose his cool briefly, and it's when they're locked in. i think he could have some form of claustrophobia.
ace's execution was so fucking cruel. in the end, he got himself killed because he was so scared. it was anticlimactic, it was immediately overshadowed by someone else, nobody really mourned him at ALL. ace didn't get a buildup, and he died knowing that the one person he considered a friend could die the longer he lived on. that is FOULLLLL.
also. ace said that he'd have a third murder on his hands. arei, levi and.... who?
veronika was so annoying this chapter. im sorry but she actually got on my nerves so much. girl. shut up im trying to watch my doomed yaoi
i still don't trust eden
hu jing kinda average, j kinda average, nico kinda average
david not much screentime, but he seemed shocked when monotv was actually unconscious at first. maybe he genuinely believed that couldn't happen? does he have a reason to think so?
im not sure whats up with arturo, smth to do with his sister, not being able to save someone? i actually missed most of the arturo lore and i dont care enough about him to look back
sucks to be charles right now, but i was more confused as to how whit was more concerned about CHARLES than the classmate(s) in front of them literally about to DIE. i know the fandom loves whit but he is giving me so many red flags i have to say it. ill make a post on him soon. i DO NOT TRUST WHIT YOUNG.
eden kinda mid rn but i just don't like her so im biased..
it was very interesting to see teruko's self-blame this chapter and her beliefs coming out more to the viewer. her talk with monotv was so interesting. so monotv really is just a robot - but why was it so sinister in that one scene very early on in drdt? yk red face smile face. we haven't seen that come up again, and monotv hasn't shown many more examples of sinister behaviour. i wonder if that was an example of monotv being controlled maybe??
im wondering if ace helped to kill mai? she could be the third death? i saw someone say that the game could be punishment for them all for what they did to/their connection to mai, and i think that's an amazing idea
also another part on levi. he's trying his best to understand ace, so much, and yet he just can't. i was very intrigued to see how frustrated he was (ha. divorce arc.) but also the fact that he put teruko's life before his own despite having more difficulty than the others is just. wow. like, anyone else in that room had the opportunity to save her, in the same way, but it was LEVI that stepped forward. and for teruko of all people.
i may have to make seperate posts i just wanted to get this out quickly while the episode is still fresh!!! ^^ sorry if missed anything!!!
#drdt#danganronpadespairtime#danganronpa despair time#teruko tawaki#levi fontana#ace markey#terukotawaki#levifontana#acemarkey#veronika grebenshchikova#veronikagrebenshchikova#whityoung#whit young#charles cuevas#charlescuevas#monotv#mono tv#drdtchapter2#drdt chapter 2#my heart is breakinggg#ace markey and levi fontana#acelevi?#acelevi#maybe#im not sure...
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“Feeling like you’re nothing is… kinda normal. If people even feel like that in the world I came from.”
TW: DISCUSSIONS OF SUICIDE
So this line specifically has been on my mind.
Obviously Pomni does not outright say she’s depressed. But she doesn’t need to. The show trusts us to pick it up for ourselves.
At first I thought it was just trauma, because… DUH. WHAT HAPPENED.
She experiences nightmares, she has zone outs, she closes herself off from her peers, panic attacks, etc. All pretty real responses to a traumatic event.
BUT THEN WE HAVE THIS LINE.
Now, I wouldn’t think too much of it if she said “In the world I COME from.” Present tense. So that would indicate she’s talking about the circus.
But she uses PAST TENSE here.
“In the world I CAME from.”
So she’s not talking about the circus.
We know she’s not because we know she was once a human in the real world.
Gooseworx confirmed that the Digital Circus characters DO remember their past lives, just not the key identify-defining details like their names. Which makes sense cause, well, if they had full amnesia they wouldn’t know they came from anywhere else at all.
So this implies she’s talking about her life in the real world before this.
So this may indicate that in the real world, human Pomni had anxiety & depression.
A theory someone else said, but I liked and could see being possible, was that each Digital Circus character represents certain mental illnesses. (My idea: Pomni - Generalized Anxiety & Major Depression Disorder, Ragatha - Separation Anxiety Disorder, Jax - Sociopathy, Kinger - Schizophrenia, Gangle - Bipolar Disorder, Zooble - Dysphoria) While it is questionable for some characters whether they experienced these in the real world or they gained them in the circus (Kinger is probably one of the latter’s case), considering Pomni’s new to the circus, it’s easy to assume the former. You don’t develop these mental problems overnight.
So here’s my theory: Human Pomni was an accountant at C&A, and got her hands on the information of the Digital Circus. As in, she knew EXACTLY what it would do to her…
…but she put the headset on anyway as an act of suicide.
This could be proven wrong in a future episode, but that is my belief on what happened to her. Would also explain how she had a vague idea on how the video game’s outside maps worked.
BUT, you may be asking, “If Pomni knew and did it as sudoku, why would she want to leave immediately?”
Survival reflex. (And I’m partially thinking about that Bojack Horseman speech at the penultimate episode of that show. You know the one.) It IS a thing for someone to attempt suicide, and then change their mind on it pretty quickly, whether it be the pain that came with it, or the fear of death. And this is in both cases whether the attempted succeeds or fails at the deed.
So the beginning of the show could be Pomni’s brain, scattered as it is, experiencing just that.
“Wait a minute. I don’t want to do this anymore. I don’t want to end it. I have to stop myself!”
But it’s too late.
She made her choice. She didn’t want to be ‘her’ anymore.
So she put the headset on.
She did the act.
There’s nothing she can do about it.
And since she TECHNICALLY isn’t dead, this is her processing her own existence, old and new, and what to do with it now.
THAT’s another reason why she has that nightmare about abstracting. Which could easily be seen as ‘mental suicide.’
A horrifying image on the outside. And on the inside, an image that’s far too real for her.
But she doesn’t have to have that be her fate.
There are people to help her and there are people that WOULD care if she dies.
Her story is about fighting the worst thoughts known to mankind and come out of that fight as a more emotionally realized person. As someone who wants to live. As someone who ISN’T nothing.
(This is a theory. Is open to be wrong.)
#amazing digital circus#the amazing digital circus#digital circus#tadc pomni#theory#tadc theory#tw depression#major depressive disorder#tw depressing thoughts#tw sui ideation#tw sui attempt#tw sui vent#tw self destruction#tw self h4rm#tw self destructive thoughts
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Alright. No art. Just positive rant. The entire point of my redesigns was me being slightly annoyed at the designs and story of Seduce Me and having way too much positive nostalgia to be normal about this game. I love-hate this game. However! The one thing I will never, never shit talk Seduce Me for is its characters. The main six love interests (Yes I am counting Diana as a main love interest. Thank Demon War for that) are all so well written! I genuinely love them. Even Sam, my least favorite character, isn’t boring. I don’t dislike him for being a bad character, I dislike him because the tsundere trope annoys me.
But this isn’t a rant about the characters as a whole. This is a rant about Damien. Let me rave for a second. Because as melodramatic as his backstory is, it got me hook, line and sinker. I am convinced that either Michaela had a period of being obsessed with Damien or some redheaded fuck boy named Damien pissed her off so much that she made him into a character just to make him suffer. This boy is tragic!
Like b r o, all the other boys’ backstories can be summed up with “The palace life is boring, my dad is kinda shitty and I got one other, reoccurring, minor inconvenience” and then there’s Damien being like- “My mom suffered as my dad’s harem girl until she couldn’t take it anymore and tried to murder me before killing herself. Also my dad is extra shitty to me. He tried to kill me a few times. Food? That’s a luxury. Energy? I’m used to not having it. A room? What is that? Please let me become human because mind reading kinda sucks, oh wait, I only got a 1 out of 6 shot for that ending. And I’m not even the canon ending!”
And another thing! Matthew’s main bad ending has traumatized me for multiple reasons but that line, “That’s what you get for making me go to the human world” after he kills Damien! Now, Matthew is a favorite of mine, but in that moment, I wanted to shake that little bitch until his soul evacuated his body! Like, I don’t care that he was being controlled, how d a r e he come firing shots at Damien when all he wanted was a good life away from his abusive ass dad!? Bro Damien may have been the illegitimate child but at that moment Matthew was the bastard.
Tragic…
On a different, lighter note, I do love the sort of contrast between him and Matthew, at least on the topic of “naivety”. Of the two, you expect the fun loving, goofball to be the naive, kind of innocent one. But that’s not the case. Matthew is optimistic, Damien is innocent. Matthew knows what he wants and while the world is a wonder to him, he goes about the world with this sort of maturity, knowing what he wants to see and when. Damien is more of the spacey type. There is this level of inexperience to how he grasps the world as if he can’t even believe that it can exist. Plus, as much as he has an idea of what he wants to see, sometimes he feels like he must ask permission. Like in the New Years Episode where if you go on Damien’s route, he asks “Can we do this every year?”.
In conclusion, I want to wrap Damien into a blanket burrito and tell him that everything is going to be okay. And then take him to therapy because this man probably has C-PTSD. As my friends would say, I am mentally ill for this demon equivalent of a sad, wet dog.
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chapter 2 of DT has ended what do you think of the last episode
Okay, let's finally get to it and end this thing!
We've confirmed that Ace was the culprit last episode and we've also found out that this final episode was going to be 27 minutes long. Shorter than the trial episodes but clearly longer than what many would think it to be.
Well first is the voting and to no surprise, it is indeed Ace-
Who voted for Teruko? Was it David? I bet it was David :P
And speaking of David!
Right?! I never get over how certain blackeneds talk about murder being wrong with everyone, knowing damn well they did it.
The relationship Ace and Levi had this entire chapter is truly sad when you think about it. Ace was upset with Levi for even threatening his life in the last chapter whule Levi has been trying to repair that relationship ever since, but Ace has been seemingly wanting to murder someone since the start of this chapter. They've both been hurt by the revelation of each other, yet at the same time are still trying to keep the image of the other in a good and positive light. "Doomed Yaoi", is what I think they call this.
But it appears Teruko has an idea that might just save them.
And I mean.....Teruko's logic isn't exactly.....wrong? What does a blackened have left to lose at this point? And it hasn't been confirmed at this point if MonoTV had any replacements or copies like Monokuma. Well we the audience know this is a fruitless effort, but the cast doesn't.
Then we get another animated cut-scene! The Dev is putting some serious work out here and I will appreciate it. But still there's no way Ace is ever going to-
OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!
GET FUCKED YOU STUPID TV HEADED BITCH! OH YOUR DAD COULD NEVER! MONOKUMA WOULD NEVER LET THIS HAPPEN TO HIM! WHERE'S YOUR DEFENSES, YOUR SPEARS, YOUR PROTOCOLS?!
Damn. I would have never, NEVER, guessed something like that would happen. Hoo boy! .....well sadly we all know how this goes.
This doesn't work, and MonoTV springs back to life. With a new voice as well. This is either some really good range by the VA, or its someone else entirely. And I could swear it sounds almost like Teruko....Hmm... I could be looking too much into this. Anyways, after that...
Oh hey, is that the rule Bubbles and Poi were talking about? I still have no idea what episode it gets brought up in. Well it looks like it's paying off now.
But MonoTV attempts to punish Teruko and everyone is trying to convince Teruko to run and hide but she is unfazed and unmoving. Calling back to Chapter 1 where Xander stabbed her and Teruko claimed that she cannot be killed, no matter what. She seems completely sure about her luck in these types of situations. So where does this put her on the luck power scale? Kinda the same as Nagito, right? But just how is she going to survive this-
LEVI AGAIN! YOU TOOK THE HIT FROM THE SPEARS IN THE PROLOGUE AND NOW THIS! WHY ARE YOU A LITERAL GLUTTON FOR PUNISHMENT? I CAN'T TAKE MUCH MORE OF THIS!
But he is alive. Barely, but alive nonetheless. However, no one can leave quite yet. Ace still has an execution to get through. And so, with a heavy heart, and scarred out of his wits. Ace demands MonoTV to execute him to get it over with so everyone can save Levi. And onto that execution.
Thanatophobia: the fear of dying.
This execution is pretty unique in the sense that it's not about Ace's talent, but rather his personality. I can only name a hand few of executions that do this sort of thing, and it makes so much more sense. All Ace has been talking about is that he's scared of death, he doesn't want to die and this execution has him face those fears personally. Death by illnesses. Death by fire. Death by drowning, getting hit by a car, falling, lighting. And finally, all that fear and anxiety caused him to have a heart attack. Ace's fear of dying finally caught up to him. It's incredibly sad. Not so fun fact is that if you notice is that certain sprites have Ace clenching his heart. Probably not from theatrics, but because he could feel the pain his heart and could tell he was indeed going to die soon. It was all a matter of time.
And adding on to this is that fact that STILL, no one cared about Ace to react to his death. I know they were all in agreement that the second it ends to get Levi help, but the only one that had any reaction or acknowledgement of it...WAS VERONIKA!
(Please stay away from me at all times...)
The elevators open and everyone gets on, save for Teruko who uses this time to talk to MonoTV and essentially....vent.
If there's one thing that Chapter 2 has made evidently clear, is that Teruko wants to trust in others. Try as she might to push others away, she still holds a lot of baggage. All stemming from her and her luck ability. At one point in her life just accepted it. She accepted all the shortcomings her luck gave her and that included the death that came with it. Whether it be from Teruko miraculously surviving events that should have killed her, or the death of others close to her such as her family like her secret claimed
Attachments bring pain, and Teruko never wants to feel that pain again. But all it's doing is making the pain worse. Chapter 1 showed what happened when Teruko was all trusting, this chapter showed what happened when Teruko wasn't trusting, and now she's worse for wear because of it.
Balance. There needs to be a balance.
And with that. The chapter comes to a close. And Teruko sits there at the trial grounds....all alone in the darkness....
........
.....Hoo boy, this chapter sure was all over the place, huh?
From secret guessing, to attempted murders, theories about swapping victims, and how Teruko would react to it all. Needless to say it kept a lot of people guessing. But I think that's good. One of the themes of this chapter; in my opinion, is the price of what happens when assume someone. Many assumed Levi was an all around upstanding fellow, when in reality he was an uncaring and antisocial criminal. Many assumed Nico was just the sweetest thing and couldn't hurt a fly, and then they nearly murdered Ace. Many assumed was too stupid to think of a murder plan this thought out, and well he did! Almost all of the cast assumed David was this upstanding and good moral-ed fellow, and then he....okay he's a whole new can of worms, but you get the point right?
But you may be thinking, well doesn't this mean you should stay away from everyone entirely. No. Of course not. That what Teruko had to learn this chapter. That's exactly why you hang around people, to know them. Even in a situation like this. I think Teruko finally got that point, or at the very least a part of it and hopefully that'll continue going on into the next chapter.
While it will be another long while before Chapter 3, or even any other bonus content we may get from this series. It's evidently clear that the Dev put a LOT of work into this second half alone, and needs an understandably well deserved break.
So until that time comes, I'll still be here doing my own thing. And hopefully you guys will enjoy that. I'll see you around!
-Mod
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your text post analyzing haters behavior is so good. I also had that jarring conclusion of oh my god . He’s tsundere. It’s so silly. and I often think about the fremergency fronfract where haters subconscious thoughts are fronted and it’s literally … he loves being good! he literally admits doing good deeds makes him feel warm and fuzzy ! and they go off and do a bunch of fun good deeds helping people?!
AUGHHH it’s so much to dissect…!
(ノ>ω<)ノ :。・:*:・゚’★,。・:*:♪・゚’☆
you get me! Hater is honestly just primed for a confesses-while-drunk fanfic and didn't that kinda already happe in one episode? WOY characters are so fun to dissect and like Hater and Wander don't have explicit backstories so you end up wondering why they are the way they are and it's so funny!
My vision for season 3 is that Hater finally has that long-awaited redemption arc but Peepers refuses to join him on the side of good, choosing villainy over his Lord (mostly because i always got the impression that Peepers has this vision of what he wants Hater to be and it frustrates him anytime Hater falls short of that grand plan). Peepers is like "fine! Ill show you! Ill be my own villain!" But due to his overall stature he has a Monsters University moral episode where he just fails at making it on his own. It's really sad but then Peepers gets recruited by this new villain who is actually as evil as Peepers desired in a partner. This villain would be the lawful evil to Dominator's chaotic evil, probably some kinda lord-dictator whose both quite than Hater AND smarter than Peepers (another idea i had was that since Hater eventually gave in to Wander's friendship while Dominator refused to be good even at her own expense, this new villain would put a sick twist on the ideas of love and friendship by being this creepy yandere type. Wander would be confronted with a type of love that is impure and hurtful, and if Dom ever comes back she'll be aromantically dishusted with them). This new villain gives the Commander all this praise and affection, but Peepers soon thinks "if im not the brains of the operation, what good am i?" So then either Peepers leaves or finds out some dark secret about why he was hired in the first place and needs to be rescued by Wander, Sylvia and Hater, and then FINALLY at the end of the season starts his own redemption arc.
Oh my God I'm so sorry, I completely went off there. I was supposed to be talking about Hater! So uh, um... The Warm Fuzzies is my fake episode idea. The premise is that a a cutesy puffball-like literal manifestation of Hater's subconscious feelings manifests in his chest and Peepers takes Hater to a bunch of different medical centres to try and get it out. Hater acts like he's a kid home from school the whole time.
Wander is so right that Hater has a soft side and Wander tries so hard to pull it out its honestly so tropey but I still love it and I know I'm not the only one!
#Reply#Wander Over Yonder#Skeletondance#Woy skeletondance#But honestly there's so much in this post I'm just getting it all put
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other mgrp yumes exist??? omg omg hi i want to hear about your ship so bad :O
- aya (@softskiesahead)
OMG I DIDNT KNOW YOU GUYS EXIST TOO?!??!?!!??! HELPP IM SO EXCITED AAAAHSDJHJHB
im not sure if youve read the light novels or not so ill do my best to keep details vague other than character spoilers :3
i actually have a handful of them, i think the two romantic/qpr f/os i have are top speed and genopsyko!!! <3 even though im pretty sure ive posted more abt tsubame on this acc i had more selfship lore ideas for genopsyko (something abt s/i and geno meeting online due to both being artists and eventually meeting by coincidence as magical girls)
i love them both so much..,,,. they're both so silly and adorable ugh
another main f/o i have from the source is my little sister lapis lazuline! i was pretty fixated on her a while back. she genuinely brings me so much happiness and comfort shes so adorable and so strong!!! i also have clantail as a little sister but i haven't talked about her as much... i probably should tbh. she deserves it after all the work she's done
the other two major familial f/os are 7753 and Mana bc i kinda started finding a lot of comfort in them after seeing their episodes stories after limited (all the fics I read of them being tepsekemei's moms probably contributed greatly to that)
I think I talked a bit too much but yaaaa =w= ty for sending this ask!! ^^
#i hope its fine if i follow!! ive never met another selfshipper who even knows mgrp so im rlly happy ^^#you have NO IDEA how long ive been waiting to dump all this info on someone#also i just realized how you found me. so sorry for possible unintentional spoilers#to be tagged#🏍🪄 bug off!#☄️💠 the blue flash descends onto the battlefield!#softskiesahead
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I haven’t watched the full episode yet (I know what happened generally) because me and my mum watch it when my dad is at work and he isn’t tonight, but I have watched Teddy and Jan’s scenes, sooooo…
Teddy is, or least was, just a kid with a toy ambulance. And I mean that ‘was’ both literally when he was a kid, and in the very recent series 36 naivety-about-the-job sense. Which has survived a little bit up until this point but I think this episode might’ve killed it off. I actually like the idea of Teddy becoming very disillusioned with the job and still never leaving it. I don’t know if I’ve expressed this in a post before but Teddy has to be a paramedic - it’s the only thing he wants to do, it’s the thing he’s best at, it’s required to keep the tragedy of that family going - but it’s not really good for him. To give the writers far too much credit, he’s the heir to the throne in a Shakespearean tragedy, it’ll kill him and he has no choice but to keep going after it. Anyway, this a great episode for my Teddy Has To Be A Paramedic thoughts. All the horrible things that happened, the fact that he's clearly shaken up, and he's still trying to keep working. That is a kid with a toy ambulance standing too close to the road if I ever saw one.
Sometimes the spoilers focus on something largely irrelevant to what is actually happening in the episode, huh? I don’t really know what to say about Len beyond 'that’s gonna fuck Teddy up'. That’s horrifying. I am really looking forward to seeing how Teddy is doing in next week's episode cause that was……….......… There’s also kinda parallels between Jan (reasonably) telling Teddy he can’t stay with Len and Jan (justifiably) not telling Teddy about Gethin going to Switzerland if you're looking for them. Edit: they also highlighted (…I don’t like to assume the writers intended to anything they did well recently) the fact that Teddy and Jan have both been really alone for a long time, since before Gethin died they’ve only really had each other because Teddy stopped actually trusting Paige and Sah around the time that Jan and Ffion re-broke-up and since Gethin died they haven’t had each other, with that part where Len asks if he and Teddy can get a dog because Jan asked Ffion the same thing when they were planning their retirement-that-wasn’t.
Also, that’s another Jan and Teddy episode with a drugs based plot point (alongside literally everything they were called to in Is The Patient Breathing? and Kezzie, AJ and their mum in Break Your Heart). Probably unintentionally, Ross looms.
The scene where Teddy wants to go back to the explosion and Jan stops him is FUCKING GREAT. Another thing I think about a lot are the ways that their personal relationship inevitably bleeds into the professional. Jan as Teddy’s boss and Jan as Teddy’s aunt. That scene, first of all, has Teddy’s tendency to pretend he’s fine and deny that he needs help or to step back from work. An overlooked trait of his, if you’re asking me, but one that has been there a long time (and that we've also seen Jan sometimes has as well). Also, there is a clear moment where Jan switches from talking to Teddy as his boss to talking as his aunt and I love it. It’s from “I know how hard it is when…" to “I know how hard it is.” when her tone changes entirely and he turns to look at her after looking away. I appreciate that singular moment so much.
Generally? Di Botcher and Milo Clarke, you've done it again (made me feel physically ill about pretend paramedics).
Next week’s spoilers about them: how many times can I say that it’s not the storyline I dreamed of after Gethin, but that I am very excited for their stuff next week anyway? (Especially because “he’s got nobody to talk to about work” makes me foolishly hopeful for a Sah mention.)
I'm gonna go listen to Class of 2013 and Fireworks by Mitski and think things about Teddy until it's next Saturday.
#will watch the full ep tomorrow afternoon#i'm actually gonna go and get drunk and try to write the first draft of an essay which sounds like a bad idea but it works for me#bbc casualty#teddy gowan#jan jenning
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hello yellowjackets pals i am FINALLY getting around to my 02x07 recap. i moved out of my dorm on friday and accidentally put my notebook w/ my episode notes in a storage bin rather than in my tote bag but i finally unpacked it so here we go. also these might be less detailed than usual bc it has been a few days so i may or may not be able to actually figure out what i was on about in my notes so whoops and i’ve also shared a lot of my overall thoughts already. spoilers below cut as per usual
- first just wanna share that i wrote the phrase “new emotional support corpse just dropped” upon seeing shauna clinging to the dead baby
- “i need you van” “i need you too” something that can be so important to me actually
- liked the stuff with tai talking to lottie about sleepwalking/other tai, “she’s not gone and that’s a good thing”, the connection other tai has to the wilderness, how she doesn’t want to be suppressed. good stuff especially as i am interpreting her re-emerging as being connected to van’s illness
- shauna in the meat shed crying for jackie was so fucking heartbreaking, i am kinda bummed we didn’t see ghost jackie this week but i do also like the idea of not being able to get her when she actually needs her
- and then shauna being unable to bond with/connect with/truly love callie and how it all comes back to wilderness baby and ultimately jackie like jesus fucking christ this woman should never have had a kid
- another quote from my notes: “girl get up nat is right there” this was about misty calling walter i need her to hurry the fuck up and kill him, he has some weird ulterior motive and i’m sick of him too much of this man (and men in general this season but alas)
- oh this was a bit of topic but when misty was digging in the snow for crystal the fake snow looked SO BAD my new england ass was pained by it like i’m sorry it was really distracting
- also where the fuck is crystal’s body
- ok so i did love the scene with misty talking ben off the ledge but also i really think he should’ve died like i love our doomed king but they are just pushing off the inevitable at this point that man needs to die
- tai taking off her wedding ring taivan kiss van doesn’t have the time to wait for her i’m so emotional about them not gonna spend much time on it here bc i have done nothing but post about them but yeah screaming crying etc
- lottie’s psychiatrist being a hallucination was so good ugh loved that and when she appeared as the antler queen just yes perfect furthering my antler queen is her own separate entity agenda
- “i think it might be time we stop resisting” ok dyke
- still not over how tai smacked van’s leg when she teased misty <3 just like the *whispers* “cunt” scene ugh i love my little lesbos
- the fact that most of them don’t have super clear memories of what happened out there but still know they did awful things UGH
- van refusing tai trying to help her ugh
- taivan dancing together being smitten with each other like they’re kids again it fucking hurts ok
- also ugh the shauna beating up lottie scene was so fucking hard to watch. i don’t have much to add to the conversation about it but yeah that was one of the few times i’ve had to look away while watching this show
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Back at it again with this mentally ill thing that I like to call my minecraft steve saga AU This time its yellow steve eddition! I remember that in an early episode of TSS Rainbow was talking about how the yellow and purple steves were created via “weird lightning accident” thing way after the original three steves were created. Here that accident included a series of very unfortunate and (un)lucky events! Basically a container filled with Origin steve’s powers were unable to find the people they were meant to go to, the container was eventually lost by time until it reappeared way after the fact and was taken from place to place as an artifact. Eventually this origin artifact fell into the hands of an unlucky enderman who happened to be hiding underneath a tree during a lightning storm, he then proceeded to try and open this bottle which unleashed the origin energy inside in a very powerful wave since it was contained for so long. The enderman was sadly vaporized so hard he died forever, but the origin energy mixing with the dna or soul or whatever of the enderman allowed for these yellow and purple steves to start spawning! The purples spawning in the end, and the yellows spawning on the planet. (idk what to call this planet right now, it would be kinda lame to just call it earth since it’s definitely not earth). I liked the idea of the yellow and purple steves forming due to a spectacularly stupid centuries in-the-waiting accident lol. I actually had to chat up one of them AIs about the end asteroid space thing because I couldn’t find any information on how that would work in orbit with a planet and stuff. Anyways what was I talking about? Right yellow steves. They are similar to the purple steves, but they are more muscular since they had to live on the actual planet where gravity is stronger. They don’t live in the same kind of “bug society” as the purples and the endermen but they did used to have some sort of monarchy in origins. Most steve civilizations moved past their British phase though. Yellow steves were always the most militaristic in their ways while they were in that phase. Despite moving past monarchical ways yellow steves somehow always manage to get into some position of power, whether that be for better or for worse :3 Also I didn’t want to leave this out but Faceless was actually designed to look at least a little bit similar to endermen because he was also created when lightning accident thing happened. This is because of void shenanigans. I will get into that voidy stuff another day because it’s a WHOLE nother can of worms. Come back in 500 years for another episode of minecraft and steve saga AU
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Tbf to SnC 25x25 was inauthentic, they had other people filming it, they had other people editing it with them, it was a lot more scripted and it was stuff which everyone else on youtube was doing at the time. Though there were moments within the series which did shine and show the real them, a lot of it felt incredibly fake and plastic and wooden and just soso cringey.
25x25 also felt very rich boys waving money around and show offy to me, which made it rather unrelatable in all honesty and this was the main reason alot of the group of SnC fans I knew online completely stopped watching them. (they stopped watching TFIL for much the same reasons very quickly)
So I can understand when they say it's inauthentic because in truth it was. We get a lot more authentic stuff in their haunted content because they do all of it themselves and its a lot less scripted and less planned out which can also be viewed as a bad thing cos as you said it means they work none stop and take no breaks even when one of them is seriously ill.
I will say I loved parts of 25x25 but overall thinking them talking badly about it is a sign of their downfall like you seem to suggest shows that you don't view their content with quite the same eyes as a lot of the fandom.
Also sorry to burst the bubble but they've always been about the money ever since they started selling merch, so it is mildly amusing you've only just noticed that now.
your idea of authentic and my idea of authentic are very much opposite lol
bc while the content they do now, in theory, is them… so was 25x25, especially the earlier episodes.
before snc started 25x25, they were so EXCITED to film this content. they couldn't wait to post about it, they were hyped as hell to film bc it was fresh and new. that level of excitement, to me, hasn't been seen since when it comes to them talking about the content they make now. maybe with the original hell week. that was about the last time they felt genuinely excited for what they were making.
the first episode was about them getting tattoos that were about one another. it was about them connecting and showing how much they cared about one another. they showed how much they trusted each other by giving one another tattoos. that episode was all about their friendship. the car crash/drifting one was about confronting past traumas, same with the video of sam jumping off the rock in seychelles after breaking his back. the scuba diving video was how to deal with anxiety on a massive scale and really pushing yourself to do something you want to do.
these videos were such a great look into who they were as ppl, something that this fandom has bitched about since day one. everyone wants to be close to snc, and they handed that to us on a silver platter, but too many ppl wanted ~spooky content~. once the reception of their new content died off and ppl weren't watching, snc clearly lost all momentum they had for what they were creating, which is why you get things like the vegas video. like yeah, that was a little braggadocios, but snc aren't exactly poor middle class americans either. they have two fucking mcmansions, one of which they were living in at the time. having money is very much an snc thing. colby's closet is kinda proof of that alone lol
i think it also didn't play out in their favor bc it was the middle of the pandemic and travelling was still a no go. so doing exclusively travel content kinda seemed dumb and irresponsible. and it was. a lot of the content they made, they could have done back home or at least with a lot less travelling. but that mixed with ppl just wanting the same old content from them, even tho it wasn't gonna happen for a while, caused a lot of ppl to dip from snc's content altogether. it also didn't help that being in this fandom at the time was kind of a hellscape.
could 25x25 be a little over produced at times? sure. i won't argue against that. but to pretend that it was less like snc isn't reality, to me. that was them just as much as this content is them. the difference is they had a fire under their ass to make something back then. they had passion. and now this… this just feels like a job. like going thru the motions.
that's not to say i think they don't care about their content at all. clearly they do. but the spark of passion they one had for this haunted content is gone to me. they pigeonholed themselves into being ghost hunters and now are somewhat regretting it. they overwork themselves and have no personal lives. and that is causing them to have burn out that will eventually come to bite them in the ass.
and obviously they do shit for money and views. it's their job after all. i've never pretended to not know that. but there is a difference between "i get to work a job i love and also make a lot of money" and "i'm doing this job bc it makes money, it is what it is". it's the lack of love for the content that is starting to seep thru, imo.
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Hey y'all, just got back from watching the rest of manlybadasshero's omori lets play and i thought i'd share some of my thoughts about the game! (NEEDLESS TO SAY, THERE WILL BE SPOILERS AHEAD!!!!)
So let's get one SUPER ULTRA MEGA BIG thing out of the way first, i would've 100% enjoyed my experience a lot more if i wasn't such a huge scatterbrain and spoiled the big twist at the end for myself. Though in my defense i kinda wasn't expecting the game to get so popular so quick when it first came out, i first heard of the game through manly and i thought it was just another obscure indie game like what he always plays. Aside from that though....I LOVED IT!!!!! It tugged at my heartstrings with it's accurate portrayal of mental illness and the heartwarming moments between sunny and his friends, it really reminded me of my own childhood in a lot of ways. I've found myself relating to all the characters in some sort of way, especially aubrey. Idk....just the way she lashed out on others throughout the game really spoke to me in a weird way......either that or it's just because i like rebellious characters in general (the fact that she has a pet bunny is a plus for me, i love bunnies!)
Ngl, i don't cry to video games often....i'm pretty sure the only games i've ever cried to are undertale and pokemon sword but even then, i was crying about pokemon sword because i was proud of myself for completing the game....and honestly, i'm glad omori is one of those games that make me emotional like that...even if i already knew sunny killed mari, even if i already knew basil killed himself in one of the endings. Though that could also be because my dog wouldn't shut the fuck up while i was watching the last few episodes and i was just stressed out about that
If i had to pick: i feel like i prefer headspace over real world, i was an undertale kid back in the day so i love me some quirky characters and fun worlds! Though tbh i feel like omocat WANTED her players to like headspace more since she explicitly said at one point that she specifically wanted to make omori a game so that people would be able to FEEL what sunny was feeling (that's the best way i can explain it i guess) that being said; i'd say my favorite characters are aubrey, spaceboy and recyclepath. I've already said what i've wanted to say about aubrey earlier but aside from that, i think she's really cool and VERY me-core! Same goes for spaceboy, i'm a huge sucker for bright colors and space-themed characters. Not to mention recyclepath is a really unique character, i've never seen a character based ENTIRELY on recycling before! Plus his coat and glasses remind me a LOT of oliver tree and i mean....hey, i like songs like alien boy and life goes on lmao
Ngl while i DID get the endings spoiled for me, there was still a lot of stuff that was a HUGE surprise for me! Like BRO I HAD NO IDEA KEL AND HERO HAD A BABY SISTER!!!! I mean....i DO vaguely remember someone mention sally in a youtube comment section but i had no idea what they were talking about and i was kinda just confused (iirc i may have even thought that kel and hero having a sister was just a weird dream i had) but i mean hey....as the youngest sister of 3 siblings who was born when my mom was in her 40's myself, i appreciate the representation! /hj
I actually first got into omori because a good friend of mine was into it, it started when he changed his pfp on discord to basil and we had a really short conversation about the game afterwards. A while later i saw an omori edit in my youtube rec and i thought "oh yay it's that game my friend likes! Let's watch it!" And the rest, as they say, is history! Dunno why the fuck it took me a whole ass year to finish the damn playthrough though
Speaking of which, i DEFINITELY wish that manly showed the hikkikomori route bosses in his playthrough. Seeing thoses cutscenes of the slime girls creating roboheart, mutantheart and perfectheart REALLY got me pumped to see the boss fights! Oh well....
All in all, omori is a SPECTACULAR game and i'm glad i decided to check it out! 9/10!
#omori#thoughts#my thoughts#would this count as a review?#omori game#omori spoilers#lets play#lets players#manlybadasshero#video games#indie games#game review#long post#what's with me and joining fandoms long after they're dead????#i may or may not make fanart for this game later who knowd#fuck i made a typo
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Wow, this is pretty good criticism for the show. Something has been bothering me about season 2 for quite awhile now.
When I watched it the first time, I'm gonna be honest... I had fun with those recent episodes. They were a lot more action packed and I was ecstatic when I saw some of the legacy characters made more appearances. However, in the last 4 episodes, I felt conflicted with how they went more into this dark direction. Especially when it's supposed to be directed towards a young audience (13+). When I saw this post today, the internal conflict I have towards this direction increased quite a bit.
For the last couple hours, I have been having this question linger in my head: Who is this show really for?
It's like this show is trying to do this "have cake and eat it too" route. Where there's one part where it goes pretty wholesome and sweet, and it goes into this other part where it acts all serious and dark.
When it comes to going towards the dark direction, I think it worked well in TFP since it had some mature themes at the very start of the show. However, when it comes to Earthspark....I don't know. It just doesn't work out well at times.
Especially when they're literally displaying scenes of Robby getting seriously ill and later on possibly dying in some form of alternate scenario. This was a way to prove to Mo how she's that needed for such heavy responsibility, which is fucking crazy looking back at it.
What's even worse is that she had to fight Mandroid ALL BY HERSELF!!!!!
A little girl had to fight a robo hating maniac (who doesn't even mind hurting her and her brother too) , and her parents just watch being all proud of her. LIKE BRUH!!!!
If that was my kid, I would have been mad at Quintus Prime for giving my kid such a responsibility and doubling down on that. I would kick both him and Mandroid's ass, and find some way that my kid doesn't have to go through this heavy burden anymore. She and her brother are already going through so much, and they're freaking kids. And, I don't care if Optimus Prime tries to stop me. I'm going to swing REAL hard on these assholes.
Along with that, the fact that they even shown the possibility of Dorothy and Alex dying in front of their kids, and Mandroid almost succeeding in committing GENOCIDE...I don't know, it's freaking crazy. I don't know how they even thought it would be a good idea showcasing this to kids when these themes are kinda pretty dark.
Also, the idea that throughout show is that they want to enforce to these kids that they are THAT deeply important in the powers they possess...I don't know. It makes me somewhat depressed. It's even worse when you have to think about the Terrans for a second. The idea that they were just created not too long ago, and they're constantly put on this pedestal that it's their responsibility in re-establishing and preserving relations between other OLDER cybertronians. They're all kids and seeing all of them having to act more like adults to fix actual adults kinda breaks my heart.
They shouldn't be exposed to the dark realities of the world so quickly. They shouldn't be given and enforce a great amount of responsibility. They shouldn't be the ones to manage how actual adults act towards one another. They should be kids by maintaining their childhood and have fun with the limit amount of time they have.
Just for ONCE, let these kids be kids and stop making them be the adults. FFS.
The fact that people are more concerned about a Nonbinary character...I don't know, I feel a bit pissed off. If people are worried about this show's direction, it SHOULD be about THIS!!!
I had a lot more criticism with the storyboards being revealed and how some parts of these episodes didn't have more screentime/context with how certain things turned out. It's something I could talk about for another day, but my brain is all fried from rambling.
What do you feel is more concerning for children with what is in the EarthSpark series; all of the clear terror and death, or having a they/them pronouned character?
Because the terror and death is seemingly entirely looked over but the ONE CHARACTER going by different pronouns is apparently nothing short of outrage.
Anon, I Am Nonbinary.
I’ll put a more thought out response under the cut
Earthspark drinking game take a sip every time an extremely young child has to emotionally support an adult or is put in life-threatening danger.
1. Steven Universe really ruined a generation of children’s media by making showrunners think they had to tackle issues like PTSD and trauma.
However, to give SU some credit, Steven was not 9 years old at the start of the show. It’s a really jarring choice that was probably made to capitalise on a more marketable demographic for TF and to keep the children’s play more lighthearted, but you get some really weird moments like (checks notes) a nine year old giving advice to an adult on how to handle trauma.
The issue with this is no nine year old should ever have to do this for an adult. They do not need to be wise beyond their years. They do not need to be a therapist for their caretakers. Grimlocks PTSD episode is one of the most egregious examples of this, where (not only is this depiction extremely one-note and weird) the narrative punishes Jawbreaker for not realising Grimlock is having a panic attack in the middle of their play.
As a framing device in a kids movie, what is a nine year old viewer supposed to take from this? The child brain is going to think ‘the adult lashed out and hurt Jawbreaker, it was his fault for being too rowdy.’ LIKE YOU WOULDNT SEE THIS IN PEPPA PIG.
And you do need to consider this when you’re writing children that young in your media, because kids are going to watch shows that have other kids the same age as them in it. There’s an almost instinctive camaraderie in seeing a fellow nine-year-old on TV when you’re at that age. So, the show is very likely going to be watched by 8-15 year olds which brings us to
2. JESUS CHRIST. THIS SHOW NEEDS TO CALM DOWN.
This show is way way way too interested in putting children in extreme danger. Constantly, towards the end of the series.
I’ll make a note first that it’s okay if kids shows have fun play-violence; kids like action. Children like low-stakes explosions. It’s not super serious and most TF media does this well, even if it’s tonally a bit more serious. This is not really an issue in a show like TFP or TFA which also had young kids.
Earthspark does not make its action low-stakes. Earthspark treats its violence extremely seriously; children cry, they scream, they get bruised, their parents wail when they see them in danger. Violence has a lasting impact, it has to because the show constantly wants to talk about trauma, so they can’t have video game rules. If they get hurt it has to impact them. Robbie and Mo are in consistent, life-threatening danger. They’re always being shot at or dropped off cliffs or almost killed and it always harrows them.
And kids can pick up on this. They’re going to realise that this is something that’s Serious, and Scary, and they’re going to be FREAKED out.
They’re also going to be freaked out when the children are fuckin. Tied into the bio-wall with tubes by Mandroid, or when Robbie has alien leukaemia and his parents are so so scared and has to rush him to the hospital and Mo is crying so much, or when their parents are seemingly killed and the kids are screaming and punching the ground and blaming themselves.
And that last part is important, because on several occasions the narrative reinforces this. The narrative. Of a children’s show. Says yes; Robbie and Mo have powers, and this makes them responsible for the well-being of the adults around them. Mo literally gets told this. By GOD. Before her parents proudly watch on without interfering as she fights in hand to hand combat with the villain (WHO IS, AS WE HAVE SEEN, FUCKING DERANGED AND WOULD LOVE TO KILL A TEENAGER JUST ONCE PLEASE PLEASE)
In conclusion, what this tells me is the showrunners are inexperienced. They didn’t consider what is appropriate for the subject matter of a children’s cartoon. They wanted to write about trauma, and war, and think kids are cute! And didn’t want their TF fanfiction to be narratively compromised by having to ‘dumb it down’ for kids.
The result is this is never a show I would ever put on for a 4th grade class in break time, at the risk of severely upsetting a lot of them. And it’s also a show I can’t enjoy as an adult, because it uses the language of a children’s cartoon to make nuanced topics more binarised and soppy.
#tf earthspark#transformers#transformers earthspark#tf#tf es spoilers#spoilers#tfp#transformers prime#huge rant#rant#optimus prime#quintus prime#I hate quintus prime#terrans#robby malto#mo malto#maltos#mandroid#nightshade#valid criticism
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Beware the Beast
Pairing: Yandere!Philza x Reader
Request: Maybe some yandere!philza headcanons? You don’t have to!
Word Count: 2k
Warning: yandere, swearing, talk about kidnapping, depression (kinda detailed on that aspect)
A/n: I accidentally turned this into a story- i really need to stop doing that. But I just couldn't resist! Also sorry if Phil is OOC. And this isn't proofread. We die like men here. Can be perceived as platonic or romantic.
This man has lived many years, lost so many loved ones. He’s getting tired of this cycle. It’s truly exhausting. You start to care about the world less. After a while, you start to see too many similarities in things, making it hard to look at. So he starts to close his heart to others. It’s just easier that way, for both parties. Saves him from the heartbreak and them from… well, him. He also stops caring for himself. After all, he’s literally immortal. Nothing can kill this man, so neglecting some self care routines every once in a while wouldn’t hurt…
But this becomes such a bad habit of his. He barely cares for himself after a while. It’s hard to find the energy when it isn’t going to matter in the end. Nothing matters anyways. Every action will always prove fruitless in the end. So what’s the point in doing something so... small if it takes this much energy? If a past version of himself saw Phil now, they’d be disgusted. Telling him to just get up and care for himself. Come on, you’re immortal. Nothing can kill you. Just do this.
He’s a mess when you two meet. His platinum-blonde hair was mostly neat, a little shaggy. It was obvious that he just got himself cleaned up a bit. One can only do so much about deep eyebags, dull hair, and lifeless eyes on such short notice.
You were introduced to him through Ghostbur. Phil was overjoyed that Ghostbur was making more friends. Though much less pleased when Ghostbur insisted that he’d bring his new friend over to meet Phil. Oh come on Phil, you’d just love them. They’re so nice! What tortured Philza more than his first interaction with you? His conversations with Ghostbur about you. He’d just prattle on about things you and him did, about how much fun you two had and how nice you were. Always nice.
And you were nice, an absolute sweetheart. But much too perky for Philza’s liking. You two had been chatting for quite a while when Ghostbur silently leaves you two together. Well, you’re chatting. Phil is just listening to you, hoping that you’d leave at any moment. Some topics were brought up; they were mostly some small icebreakers to get acquainted more.
When your past was brought up, you’d always paint this fucking picture-perfect past. So peaceful. God, the envy he had of you, of the peace you experienced in your life- He felt bad for it, honestly, he did. But he just wished he could’ve had even a fraction of the prosperity you spoke about. For someone living in the DSMP, you had a relatively easy and steady life. No war, no major or sudden loss or anything of that sort. A perfect life.
After that, you just kept coming back. Why? Why are you coming back? Are you here to taunt him for the life he lived? For the life he’ll never have? Is some god sending you as a punishment? A living example of everything he gave up, had to leave behind. That’s what he believed, anyways.
That was far from your intentions. You saw how he was in your first meeting; jumpy yet dissociating from reality. An oppressive, glum aura seemed to just emanate him. So downtrodden and dead inside, yet so obviously alive on the outside. It hurt to see him like that, as you went through something similar. You had no idea how long he’d been like that, but you decided that you’d help him in any way that you could.
You tried to make it a daily thing. Everyday you’d go to Phil’s house around midday to afternoon. You two would talk for a bit, but you’d couldn’t help sprinkling your questions in. Have you eaten yet, mr. Philza? Have you had water today, mr. Philza? Have you preened your feathers, mr. Philza? Have you bathed today, mr. Philza?
Your questions irked Phil. Everyday, without fail, you’d come and talk to him. It’d be small talk at first; what the weather was up to that day, some light politics, Tubbo’s new adopted son. Small. Yet you’d always bring up his self care. He was a fcking grown man. He could take care of himself. What’s worse? You’d pester him to care for himself in that instant if he even showed a small sign of negligence. And you’d stay the entire time, making sure he did everything. And then you’d always add “mr. Philza” on the end. It was a sign of respect, yet it upset him so much. But he couldn’t exactly pinpoint what it was.
Though it was annoying, it got him in the habit of caring for himself. It was only to stop your pesting! That’s the reasoning. The only reason. It wasn’t because you’re congratulating and giving him treats when he remembered to care for himself. Or you petting his wings… Those were only bonuses! He swears!
It becomes more steady as time goes on; you go and visit Phil, you talk with Phil and see if he’s caring for himself, and if he was, you’d reveal a delicious treat from within your enderchest. You two would talk while munching on the food, having fun sharing what your pasts were like. Well, more like yours. Phil didn’t really talk about his.
But he still seems so cold, disinterested. Even with how long you’ve been going over for. Like he’s only listening to what you’re telling him. If he’s even listening. And seeing how he interacted with others like Techno and Ranboo, it really disheartened you. He was so much more lively with them, more natural. Loud laughing and silly little antics. It only took a few small, insignificant depression episodes for your self doubt to finally debilitate you. Though it only really affected your contact with Phil; he was a big insecurity of yours.
So you start to distance yourself. You were hurting and saw yourself as a bother to Philza. It would’ve been better if you just didn’t try to talk to him anymore. He’d be so much happier without you bugging him all the time. All of this sudden, open time gives you much more empty hours. There was nothing to do. So you did what you could; you went out to make or strengthen friendships. It was so nice. You never realized how everyone on the smp was so nice. Maybe they weren’t as bad as Phil was making them all out to be…
Philza was upset the first day you weren’t there. You were such a steady element of his day. You were like the very air he breathed; it was extremely hard to live without you. He never noticed before how much he needed you. Yes, he knew that he really enjoyed you, saw that you were a pillar, a constant in his life. He came to enjoy your visits, but hadn’t realized how dependent he became because of them. It was day three when Phil started to worry about you. Why hadn’t you come to talk with him, like usual? He’s taking care of himself, just for you, just like you kept insisting he do. And he made you some cake.
He knew he was acting odd, lovesick even. His love for you was toxic, extremely so. It wasn’t healthy, yet he couldn’t care less anymore. You were like his nicotine to a smoker; he couldn't live without you being in his life. His everyday life. So after some debating, he finally went out to look for you.
Traversing the nether wasn’t too bad, but still a tedious walk. He was stuck in his mind the entire trip there, wondering where you could be and what you could be doing. Maybe you got caught up in making something. A redstone project? That’d be pretty cool. Or maybe moving? No, if you were, you’d have told him. But that didn’t stop him from speeding up just a wee bit. Just to make sure you were actually still on the smp.
His mind was racing, thinking of any possibility of what you were doing. And his mind eventually hit something that absolutely terrified him; you could be sick, injured, or dying. It felt like the world just fucking stopped. This was a sudden loss of contact and you still hadn’t come to talk with him. So that… that means there’s a high probability of you being in danger.
He ran the rest of the way to the main part of the smp. When he came out of the portal, he frantically looked around for any sign of you. For your house. Then it hit him; he had no idea where you lived. You only mentioned it being cold where you lived, just like where he lived. So that most likely meant Snowchester. He started running toward the cold nation
On his way to Snowchester, he observed his surroundings. A little bit. He had to get to you, keep his eye on the prize. And he was glad that he looked around. There you were, on another part of the prime path.
He was overjoyed to see you, especially doing so well. Soon he came to a stop. Just floored by the fact you were there, in front of him. Frantically he tried to view you as best he could, looking for any sign of injury or illness.
Now he couldn’t come across as clingy or desperate. That wasn’t how you knew him. You know him as Philza; the kind but a mild social recluse. Not really going out to others unless he needed something or he was needed.
So he walked over to you, trying his best to look nonchalant. Like he wasn’t just desperately searching for you a moment ago. He called out to you and guess what happened? You started to walk away. He was stunned. Did you just ignore him? No, you must not have heard him. It was kinda windy out at the moment.
Logically he did the best option, following you. He had no clue where your destination could be. You were going to a different area of the smp than he had been. My how the smp changed since the destruction of L’manberg. He knew it changed, but it seemed so much bigger than what you described.
He didn’t exactly pay attention to where you were indirectly leading him. That was until a flash of movement caught his attention. Snapping out of it, he looked to see what could’ve been going on. Who could’ve been there. And what he saw before him was a terrible sight.
Quackity stood by your side, animatedly chatting with you. Phil was confused as to why you were talking to Quackity of all people. You two recently talked about how Quackity was problematic and arrogant. If you knew that, then why were you talking to him?
Awkwardly he watched you. Not within earshot, but where he could keep an eye on you and Quackity. And Quackity was looking at Phil too. His eyes spoke volumes; Quackity wasn’t pleased that Phil was there. Boy was that sentiment shared. It was tense between the two, yet you still seemed oblivious to what was going on.
Then Quackity said something, putting his hand on your shoulder and leading you somewhere else. But gave one last look at Phil, one that just spoke “fuck off”. Phil wished he could’ve told Quackity the same. To get him away for you.
Quackity’s action sparked a thought in him. A reason as to why you hadn’t come to talk to Phil; Quackity must’ve kidnapped you! Yes, that’s why you hadn’t come. It makes so much sense. Quackity knows you and most likely knows you talk to Phil.
With how easily you tell Phil of the people you’re talking to, he doubts that the behavior would just change. But that’s what must’ve gotten you in so much trouble; you were too trusting, too kind-hearted. You gave Quackity a chance and he was stealing you away, imprisoning you. You needn’t worry dear, he’ll rescue you from that foul man.
#tw: yandere#c: phil#dodo writing#mcyt x reader#philza x reader#dream smp x reader#yandere#yandere philza#yandere dream smp#dsmp shipping#tw: swearing#yandere x reader#yandere philza x reader#c: quackity#tw: depression#tw: mental health
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mcu spiderman agere headcanons/drabbles!!!! (part 1?)
characters in this: peter parker and ned leeds! (mentions of mj and aunt may, but barely)
just rewatched most mcu stuff and i had a great idea, soooo heres me rambling about peter parker as an age regressor! i have a feeling ill do another with just some misc. thoughts about lil peter, but who knows!
also also also, of course we are ignoring canon bc why would i pay attention to that when i can have fluff and hurt/comfort
cw for impure regression, panic attacks, and general canon typical angsty stuff! probably not good to read if youre regressed rn!
(this is just based off of how i regress! may not be accurate for everyone!)
(also this is probably ooc? but i mean,,, THIS IS MY BLOG AND REALITY IS WAHT I MAKE IT!)
peter started regressing (unknowingly) after the events of spiderman: homecoming, after all the stuff with vulture.
its mostly involuntary, usually happening after nightmares, panic attacks or ptsd episodes (when its a negative trigger)
other times when peter involuntarily regresses, its from sleepovers with ned or mj, movie nights with aunt may, etc. it isnt all bad!
his first times regressing were late at night after nightmares about vulture. he woke up scared and panicking, but suddenly his brain ended up feeling super fuzzy. as much as it helped, it also scared peter at first. he felt small and like he couldn't protect himself.
the way that ned found out was from a sleepover they had at peters. peter woke up having a panic attack. and after ned calmed him down, he realized peter was acting very childish. chewing on his hoodie strings, clinging to ned and slurring his words.
ned spent time after peter fell asleep researching for why peter was acting like a kid, ending up on some tumblr blog explaining "age regression". when peter woke up he was really embarrassed to find out he acted like a toddler im front of his best friend, but glad that he finally had a name for what had been happening. ned was really supportive and even encouraged it.
after that ned became the main person he would call or talk to when he regressed. ned was surprisingly good with kids and small peter really liked him! during one of their sleepovers, ned surprised peter with a sippy cup and a stuffed animal, which big peter was kinda embarrassed about ajhsjshdhsgshf (they totally didnt end up being small peters comfort items when small, definitely not/sa)
ned made sure peter knew that he could call him anytime he regressed, which usually ended up being late at night.
ned as a caregiver (?) is very much new mother vibes. constantly worrying over peter when he got the slightest upset and being really scared hes gonna mess up. (peter always tells ned hes doing great, when hes big)
ONTO GENERAL HEADCANONS!!!!
peters favorite shows when small are older 2000s shows, bc that what he watched when he was a kid. (fosters home for imaginary friends, codename knd, blues clues, oswald, jenny the teenage robot, MUPPET STUFF he would love muppets stuff, i know bc he told me himself/j)
peter wears big hoodies and fuzzy socks when hes small (pants? who knows).
his favorite activity is playing with legos and coloring (both things supplied by ned and aunt may [ill get into aunt may after this])
peters super clingy when little. will cry if hes not koala clinging to someone. im half joking but also he WILL start whining until someone hugs him.
(if this gets any attention ill write a one-shot maybe,,, mayhaps,,, perhaps,,,,,)
#spiderman agere#spiderman age regression#peter parker agere#?#agere#age regression#sfw agere#sfw age regression#agere blog#fandom agere#marvel agere#idek what to tag this dhajgdjagshagshs#goldieundercover
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Talks Machina Highlights - Critical Role C2E123 (Feb. 2, 2021)
After last week’s thoroughly relaxing and brief episode, tonight’s guests are Sam Riegel and Liam O’Brien!
Brian, to Sam: “You look like Tim Curry moved to Nantucket to become a sommelier.”
How did Caleb and Veth approach the ally-ship with the Tombtakers? Sam: “I mean, we got some information, and I think we got a little closer to Lucien and knowing whether he has any of Mollymauk inside of him, which is I think the most important knowledge that we’re seeking right now. Is there someone to be saved inside there? We got glimpses, and we got a little hint that Mollymauk is maybe still in there? Maybe? And we got a little more insight into their plans, so that was useful.” Liam: “We know why we were having that fucking dream.” Sam: “But other than that, it was just a road trip with assholes.” Liam: “All our plans have been ripped in a new direction, and it’s just been improvisation.” Sam notes that it feels like we’re always about to rip into Caleb’s backstory, but haven’t yet followed that thread all the way through. Liam: “It’s partially frustrating, to be sure, but also I like the idea that-- his whole shit has been selfish, it’s been dealing with the trauma that he’s been through and not the greater world, and that’s been shifting somewhat.”
Does Caleb think the book was worth it, and is he still interested in reading more? Sam: “How do you ask Caleb not to read a book?” Liam: “Caleb has spent enough time with the Nein to know you shouldn’t put a hand on a hot stove. After what happened with the book, he knows it’s a terrible idea. But maybe. But it’s a really bad idea. But reserve judgment, but it’s a really terrible idea. I think that Caleb is very aware that mages and people like him very easily fall prey to their curiosity and it can lead to bad places. But there is still that amount of scientific endeavor where you think there is value in knowing and learning, and maybe we can ride that line. He was True Neutral at the start of the campaign, and maybe he’s Chaotic Good now, but part of him is hubris, even if it’s a little bit, still.”
What about Otis has drawn Veth’s focus? Sam: “I mean, he’s a little shit. She was curious about Otis because he’s a small like she is, and in talking to him, he seemed to be real creepy, but he was just creepy and distant and didn’t value his past or family or anything like that. She sees someone who’s like her, but so not like her, and maybe that scares her a little bit more.”
How does Caleb feel about Beau being on this ride with him? Liam: “The dream is another example of how Caleb had very narrow vision of the things he wanted to do. It used to seem so massive to him, but now... To have Beauregard involved feels right. If anyone in the group is going to stop him from grabbing something he shouldn’t, it is probably Beauregard. She’ll punch him in the fucking face to stop him, which I think he needs, to a certain extent. They’re two different kinds of nerds, and I kind of like that, that this group of nine philosophers, they’ve reached out and somehow grabbed the two nerds in the party.”
How do Caleb and Veth see the Somnovum? Sam: “I mean, they seem real bad. Anything that’s a quorum of powerful entities heading towards your planet to unleash an energy of any kind, typically bad? I assume they’re bad, or at least the Tombtakers wish them to do ill.” Liam: “I think they want the kind of peace that comes from snapping your fingers and turning people to dust. Caleb sees them as a cautionary tale; they’re the worst-case scenario for arcane inquisitiveness.” He sees Allura Vysoren as the antidote to that.
Why the staunch refusal to use Halfling Luck? Sam: “I don’t like Luck! I just don’t like Luck. I think it’s cheap, I think it’s a cheat, I think it’s stupid. It just feels like a do-over.” Liam: “I am your antithesis! If I ever voice a halfling, I am going to hammer that feature!” Sam: “What I love about D&D is that you don’t know what’s going to happen. If you roll bad, okay, that’s it. If you roll well, it makes the success more enjoyable to know that it’s a pure success and don’t one where you’re like well actually... it’s so stupid. If someone was about to die, I would probably use the fuckin’ Luck feature. Well. It depends who. If it was Travis, yeah, no, he’s fucked, sorry.”
Liam drops that he’s picked Sam’s character class and race again for a hypothetical campaign three. Sam: “It’s not what I was thinking for future characters, but I’m excited to explore.”
Cosplay of the Week: an amazing Mollymauk by KatofValkyrie!
What was it like to bring the Tombtakers into the tower? Liam: “It is complicated, because he does not like him. Lucien’s just a fucking dick. But Caleb also knows that Molly’s in there somewhere. That tower’s only for the M9, and Lucien’s not in the M9. Their situation with these people is shitty, it’s terrible. Caleb doesn’t feel like they have the upper hand. He doesn’t like that they’re even going on this journey per se, because life is bigger than his bullshit. He feels like they’ve been losing over and over again, so it was a gamble to try to get on equal footing.
What spurred Veth into making sure she and Yasha have some one-on-one time? Sam: “Yasha hasn’t been getting a lot of moments to shine. Now that she’s back, I just got the impression that Yasha feels out of place sometimes, or timid, or unsure of herself. When Veth was Nott, Nott certainly had her share of those moments. I think she sees a kindred spirit and wants to make sure that she’s been giving all the opportunity she can to flourish and thrive. Dani, you’re just laughing at my mustache, aren’t you?” Dani: “Yes, that’s the only thing I’m laughing at through this whole bullshit.” Sam denies all knowledge of trolling, but eventually admits, on the topic of Yasha and Beau getting together: “They’ve made me wait this long... I’m going to make them wait a little bit longer!”
What was it like to show his friends the upper floors? Liam: “I kinda expected somebody to sneak up there before that. That being part of the tower is not even a conscious choice of his, it just is. The reason Caduceus has creeped Caleb out for a long time is because he talks about how-- Caduceus is a really kind person and wants Caleb to let go of the past. And in a really simplistic way, turn that frown upside-down. And that’s just not who Caleb is, and it’s not who everybody is. There is something to be said for trying to stay open and positivity, but thinking you can shut out the past, especially a traumatic one, is just not true. When things happen to us, we carry them. But to candy-coat it and say, ah, I’m free, or everything is good, or I’ve turned the corner... life is way messier than that. It’s not flipping a switch, it’s not bad-to-good, it is such a work in progress. Even when you make strides and start to get to a better place, you can backslide a lot. So the tower is who he is, and the tower is 7/9ths love for his friends, and 1/9th hope, but there’s still a percentage of him that carries everything from the past, and knows that he should, and knows that he should not go back to where he was. And the way to do that is not to say everything is rainbows, but to remember it. The tower is just like an extension of who he is. He’s never going to forget the past, and he’s never going to be like, I’m good, or I’ve turned a corner. He should remember the past, and he should do better, always.”
Does Veth still believe it’s possible to get Molly back? Sam: “Well, she was a person trapped in another body for many years, so has some experience there, and definitely believes that the spirit and soul of Molly is in there and just needs to be unlocked somehow.”
Fan Art of the Week: an amazing group shot by HarpySN!
How are Caleb and Veth dealing with their guilt and fear about being in the middle of this? Sam: “It definitely was a deep conversation that might have repercussions going forward. The problem with all of what we’re doing now is that we don’t have time to deal with our petty problems anymore. It’s all high tension all the time!” Liam: “It’s true; they’re not in control of their situation at all anymore.” Sam: “It’s good to have these check-ins, but it’s not like we can do anything about them. We’re reactive right now.” Liam: “He’s not happy with where they are, but they wouldn’t even be this far if the goblin hadn’t pulled him out of the mud. So part of it is, you saved me from where I was and got me on my feet again, and now it’s disconcerting to see it all just get knocked sideways by something he never could’ve predicted. I think Caleb felt nostalgic for when things were simpler, in a way, for them, when we’re both troubled drifters.”
What was it like to see Gelidon’s return? Liam: “I am the least superstitious person at the table. Ashley’s dice suck.” Sam: “It was fun fighting a dragon!” Liam: “Two massive battles in one episode, neither of which came away with a victory. I guess surviving is a victory.” Sam: “I’d forgotten about the dragon, honestly.” Liam: “I loved it. I was so upset at the idea that we were going to stealth and not get into it.”Sam: “Mercer doesn’t keep a live dragon around and not do something with it. That dragon’s coming back.”
How do Caleb and Veth feel about going to see Essek? Sam: “He can be very helpful, I believe, but as Sam Riegel, a player of D&D, I’m super suspicious. What the fuck is Essek doing up there, so close, now? I don’t trust him as far as I can throw him. And I can throw him pretty far because he floats.” Liam: “I 100% agree with you. I do not understand what Essek could bring to what we are going through. I know the audience loves him, I love him too. He’s a really cool character. But he’s fucking toxic. He out of curiosity caused a war between two nations. And Caleb has been changed for the good by the M9 from months of travel with them. Essek has had none of that. Caleb has changed for the good, but not because of people like Essek. Essek is where Caleb came from. We kept the lid on the pot during the whole treaty at sea and it almost all went fucking sideways, and only because we pressed him into a corner. I hope that guy finds some sort of balance and peace for himself, but I do not see how his input here would be helpful. There’s other heavy hitters that I would try to pull in.”
Liam notes that the Cloven Crystal is in the Bag of Holding. Sam: “Do I have Fluffernutter, or is Fluffernutter gone?” Liam: “Nope. 300 pounds of fireworks? Gone. A dead mage, a threshold crest, and fireworks.” Dani: “Your basic essentials.”
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