#also i just tried chamomile lavender tea for the first time

[biibini]

modern!mizu headcannons

a/n: my brain has been nothing but her so it’s ab time i write ab her. i’ve read a bunch of modern!mizu headcannons ab her but i need more !! it becomes a drabble at the end but my girl deserves peace and happiness pls

i’ve read a lot of hc w her in uni so i’ll prob stick to the similar things ive read + more

modern!mizu would def be in university studying mechanical engineering

ik this is specific but pls hear me out it fits bc shes a smartie & her adopted dad (master eiji) was a very technical person when she was growing up

she’s also in uni due to an engineering scholarship

modern!mizu is usually at the gym if it wasn’t for classes and fixing her bike

yes she has a motorcycle. i stand by this hc and many others who share similar ideas.

prob a kawasaki ninja but decked out w her own alternations

modern!mizu is a gym rat but is too stubborn to admit it, esp after taigen pointed it out once

likes to go in the early morning for the peace and quiet

she typically goes in for cardio and weights to keep her healthy and in shape but has dabbled in calisthenics before

taigen used to fence w her before he got into other sports such as basketball

(random thought but he just looks like he would play basketball player)

modern!mizu is very smart… but has a slight huge problem with procrastination

akemi has tried many studying techniques with mizu but it ends up her procrastinating and finishing alone

she prefers studying alone in the library or at her desk, until you came along

(ill elaborate on mizu & reader another time)

modern!mizu cannot cook for shit i’m sorry

she can kinda chef it up but it’s taken her a while she nearly burnt the kitchen and has repeatedly turned on the fire alarm and now ringo has ptsd

usually ringo will cook something or help her cook

speaking of ringo

her and ringo are roommates in off-campus housing 2 bed 2 bath

at first, dad eiji was a bit hesitant since he was helping mizu move in but warmed up to ringo once he cooked them dinner (his mom’s soba recipe)

mizu swears she saw a tear roll down her dad’s cheek that day

modern!mizu usually dresses more casually and comfy but still likes her dark blues

not to self indulge but she would like the baggy acubi look that she can move in

(i know this is so inaccurate of others’ headcannons but pls the baggy button up + slingbag combo would go crazy)

ik she got a uniqlo drawstring sling bag

or just any sporty crossbody sling bag

hear me out pls

it’s easier to get on and balance on her motorcycle with comfy clothes and a secure bag

on mizu’s and ringo’s move-in “anniversary” (as ringo like to call it), he got her a lil keychain for her bag with a jingle on it as a joke to her initial move-in gift to him: a bell for being so silent

modern!mizu usually keeps to herself and her friends

after her ex bf m*k*o (yes im censoring his name he doesnt deserve to be typed out) , she’s very cautious of who to trust

thankfully, ringo, akemi, and taigan (as much of an ass as he is) has taught her to open up and be okay with who she is

but there are days when she prefers to be alone and sticking to her own business in peace and quiet

headphones on locked in 🎧

modern!mizu likes to wind down before bed with some chamomile or lavender tea

her temper used to control her feelings, especially when she was much younger

having a small routine at night keeps her calm & well rested

eiji initially started this routine after their long days of welding in the backyard

she can’t cook but give her a teapot and tea leaves, she will make it right

(ok im done imagining her life lets get to the good stuff)

modern!mizu loves little touches

whether it’s holding u by ur hand or shoulder or waist, her hand will always be there

her main love language is physical touch

the more comfortable she gets with u, the longer she’ll leave her hand on u

whenever u and her are out at a party or gathering, u implemented the secret squeeze if either one of u wants to get out

u haven’t used it before but mizu did a few times

it was when she just wanted to be closer to u in the comfort of her own bed

modern!mizu enjoys shopping w u

she kind of knows her style: comfy and light

but she never explored how to pair clothes together until u showed her some basic pairing

when she first met akemi, she was uncomfortable with more feminine styles and shopping for going-out tops with her

it mainly stems from just not knowing a lot of trends and seeing a wide range of items

she got accustomed the items but seeing u have fun trying new tops

totally not sneaking into the changing room and stealing a few kisses many kisses

modern!mizu also enjoys holding ur things for u

she won’t say it explicitly but she is silently expressive ab it

u need someone to hold ur drink while u fix ur shoes? she got it. need someone to hold ur bag while u go to the bathroom? she got it.

need someone to get a glass of water even though ur all comfy in bed? she will get it (for a price aka some extra cuddles & kisses)

she’s also the type of put ur hand behind ur back when ur in a crowd

ok thats all for now but hope u enjoyed ♡

[h-c-u]

Racing back home

Summary: Bono comes back home earlier than expected.

Pairing: Peter "Bono" Bonnington x reader

W/C: 1.1k

Rating: PG

TWs: None

A/N: Some Bono fluff. I'm gently easing myself into writing him, so it's a short one, but I hope you guys will like it :)

Masterlist | List of tags

There was a time when you couldn't imagine yourself sleeping with someone in the same bed and getting a good night's rest. That changed the first time your then very new boyfriend stayed overnight and - in his sleep - pulled you into his strong arms and held onto you, as if you were the last breath on Earth. Even though he was very strong, he wasn't breaking your ribs or restricting your ability to breathe, he just... didn't let you go. Metaphorically and literally, because when you tried to shift away, his arms stayed in the same position, wrapped around your body lightly enough for you to be comfortable, but also strong enough that getting out without waking him up was impossible. And since you knew he didn't get much sleep because he was battling jet lag, you made a mature decision to try to muscle through the night without sleep, so he could get some well-deserved rest. But as soon as you got used to the warmth radiating from his body, which at first seemed unbearably hot, you were a goner.

You didn’t even realize you fell asleep because it happened so quickly. And when in the morning you woke up, with his arms still wrapped tightly around you, you couldn't believe how well-rested you were. If not for the fact that you had to get up for work, you would have stayed in bed much longer.

And when he had to leave for the next race and you were alone in bed again, not only it took you much longer to actually fall asleep, but you were waking up restless in the middle of the night as well.

But the realization dawned on you only when Pete stayed over the next time, and if you had to be honest - you were a little bit pissed because you hated that your comfort depended on someone else. It took you a few months to actually accept it, but eventually, you did, and now that you had lived together for over a year, you absolutely dreaded race weekends, when he had to leave for a few days, and sometimes even weeks. Like now...

He was gone for 19 days already, and the only thought that kept you sane was the fact, that tomorrow at 3 PM he will be landing back home. Just one more night of sleeping alone, and you would have him to yourself for the whole two weeks. You took a melatonin pill, drank lavender-chamomile tea and when you were finally in bed, you quietly put on a true-crime podcast that usually helped you fall asleep, but it still took you good 30 minutes to actually say goodbye to your consciousness.

Because of all the... help... you needed to sleep, you didn't hear the door downstairs quietly opening and closing, or the short beep of the alarm being armed again. You were oblivious to the soft steps slowly coming upstairs, and the door to your bedroom being opened. The quiet click of glasses being put down on a bedside table, the clang of a belt being opened, as well as the ruffling of the clothes being taken off all eluded you in your slumber.

Only when the mattress next to you dipped under the additional weight, you woke up with a quiet hum, still not quite sure what was happening. Only when familiar arms wrapped around you, your eyes shot open.

- Pete! - you turned around, so you could see him. - You were supposed to be back tomorrow... - you smushed your face into his chest just as he pulled you closer. He smelled mostly like recycled air and cheap economy food, but there was also still a faint echo of burned rubber and smoke clinging to his skin, but you didn't mind that in the slightest because he was back. Plus, you suspected that most of the scent was absorbed by his clothes because usually, you were pretty sensitive to anything that irritated your nose, and right now it wasn't that bad.

- Couldn't wait... Wanted to see you, Love... - he mumbled while he buried his face in your hair in search of the comfort he was missing for almost three weeks now. - Sorry to wake you up... - he added, and you chuckled quietly, tightening your arms around him even more because part of you was afraid that it was all a dream, and when you woke up, he wouldn't be there.

- Dnt apowogiz... - you mumbled straight into his chest, intertwining your leg with his, and this time - he chuckled, clearly amused by your flawless pronunciation. You instantly smiled and turned your head a little bit, so your lips wouldn't be pressed against Pete's skin. - But how are you even here? - you asked because your math wasn't adding up.

- I went to the airport straight from the track... - he was clearly exhausted, but he started to relax under your touch, so to accelerate this process even more, you started gently scratching his back and he hummed approvingly as he continued to melt into you. - I probably still stink like the pit lane... Sorry... I'll take a quick shower... Just... In a minute... - he mumbled quietly, and the breaks in between each sentence were getting longer. You could easily tell that he was slowly falling asleep, but you didn’t give a damn, because he was back in your arms.

- Just sleep... You deserve it... - you whispered, and turned your head back, so your forehead was yet again pressed against his chest. Shower - for once - could wait until the morning, and Bono was too tired to argue with you, or to even say anything more. He just held you close, as his breathing slowed down and he fell into deeper phases of sleep. The adrenaline from the sudden wake-up was still in your system, so you stayed conscious a bit longer, absorbing his presence with your whole body. His steady breath, a slow rhythm of a beating heart that you could both hear and feel; the rough skin of his shoulder under your fingers, and - most of all - a dominating warmth that engulfed your whole body. In his sleep, Pete bent one of his knees and hooked it around your thigh, pulling you even closer, because after starving for your touch for so long, even unconscious he was searching for it. And you let him, moving your hand from around his shoulder to his lower back and resting it there.

With your bodies completely intertwined, it didn't take you long to fall back asleep, while a true-crime podcast was still quietly playing in the background. 

A/N 2: Please don’t feel obligated/pressured to reblog, because I write mostly for myself. A comment would be appreciated though :) Love, G.

[smol-stardust]

Good kinds of tea for me to try??

I’m glad you asked, please, sit down while I ramble away about my beloved known as tea :)

(Disclaimer: some of teas I’m thinking of might be specific to brands I can get here so sorry if one piques your interest but isn’t available) Long list ahead

Herbal Teas:

Mixed Berry Teas

Rose hip tea

Honestly any fruit tea haha

Chamomile

Apple chamomile warm fuzzy happy feels

Apple Cinnamon

Lemon Zinger: cold relief and soothing zingy taste beloved

Sleepy Time: soothing minty and just calm

Candy Cane Mint Tea

Gingerbread (holiday tea) high in cinnamon and very calming and soul warming :)

Pomelo Tea If you can get like a jar of pomelo, and mix it with water or black tea it’s kinda sweet and tangy. And, sore throat soother :)

Caffeinated

Lavender White Tea (iced) it has a bit of a slight oily feel that’s hard to get used to at first. But if you like the scent of lavender you’ll like it.

Genmaicha (brown rice and green tea) it’s kind hot an earthy taste, not everyone’s cup of tea, but one of my personal favourites. Also boosts impunity and had many gut & health benefits :)

Strawberry black tea or green tea (make your own and shove in the fridge) 2 tea bags got 1L of water, add some lemon slices/juice and strawberry purée or juice (or pineapple juice :)

Peach Green Tea

CHAI CHAI CHAI!

^ Add some milk and cinnamon too if you want :)

MATCHA try osuicha (thinner, less thick and strong) first if you’ve never tried matcha

(but also… uh, white stores sell like one type so stick with about one to two thumb sized scoops) SORRY FOR THE SHADE! it’s kinda true tho

GREEN TEA (do not leave your teabags in past 2 minutes, gets bitter at that point)

Oolong (taste is strong. Not for everyone) have with milk and brown sugar tho! It’s good that way too :)

Rooibos with a dash maple syrup

Classic Orange Pekoe/ English Breakfast with milk

MISC CATEGORY

ICED BARLEY TEA (grew up on this stuff in Taiwan haha ) idk if they sell that stuff here, but I love the light sweetness and it’s got this cooling effect (hence why it’s a summer drink)

WINTER MELON TEA. sweet kinda syrupy Taiwanese must have. Sorry…I doubt you could get it overseas, but look out for the condensed chunky block forms at Asian markets maybe? To cook a batch at home

Anyways, long tea ramble!! Try some out and hope you like them :)

[helium-rambles]

My Favorite Perfumes

Ahh, thank you!! Excuse to ramble!

First off @moth-time YES! They are SO much nicer than alcohol, in my opinion. They make some oil perfumes that are still sprays, but I go for the ones that are roll on or just dabbed onto the skin. Sprays have a tendency to stick to clothes and thus last longer and have more projection, over something just on the skin that will evaporate from your body heat.

I shop indie perfumes as it's easier to find oil based ones (and it's usually significantly cheaper!)

Of all the indie perfumes houses I've tried, so far my favorite is Cherry-ka's Trunk on Etsy. They make fragrances inspired by fandoms and horror tropes and the wild west and overall are just really cool. I found them by looking up a fandom thing on etsy and was confused as to why a fragrance showed up. Eventually curiosity got the better of me and I tried some, and have been in love ever since.

I've now sampled 55 of their scents. Of those, I have destashed 17 of them to my roommate, am currently sampling 7, and the rest I liked enough to finish up the sample and some I'll full-size (or have already full-sized). Also worth noting that they're gender-inclusive! All their scents are for people of any gender! (Some indie perfumers tend to label feminine or masculine or unisex perfumes, which is apparently an indicator for people who are into mainstream perfumes to get an idea of a scent profile. But as someone who doesn't have the baseline knowledge of what that means, I feel a little off-put on trying some of those scents.)

My absolute favorite from Cherry-ka's Trunk (and of every fragrance I've ever tried) is Flying which has notes of fir, mint, and florals. This is also the one that taught me about resting oils. When I first got it, it pretty much just smelled like mint to me. I liked it (in fact, I will wear almost anything with mint in it) but it was pretty plain mint. Then as I used up the sample, the other notes became more pronounced. When you first apply it, it's still mostly mint, but the florals add some sweetness to it, and as the scent dries down, there is the astringent woody quality of the fir.

I didn't even notice the change as I used up the sample, but once I finished the sample, I found myself missing it so I bought a full-size. When I finally got it in the mail I was disappointed to sniff it and only get mint. Why did I want to full-size this again? I put it at the back of my perfumes and forgot about it for a month, only to try it again and be like WOW! I LOVE THIS! I waited until I used up my 5ml to purchase another, and I regretted waiting it, because I had to wait another month for it to become as beautiful as it gets. Next time, I'm ordering as soon as my bottle starts running low!

Other ones I've full sized from them are...

Pronounced (metal, green tea, paint, musk ) This smells strongly of metal to begin with! If you do not like the scent of metal, I don't recommend this. The metal fades away into a beautiful musk. I'm addicting to their musk. It's not an overy dirty musk, nor the laundry detergent musk. I don't know what type of musk it is, but I know I'm the most attractive person alive while wearing it. Oddly enough, I've found this is a summer scent for me.

Two Queens (lavender, coffee, musk, aftershave) Honestly, I got this for the coffee note, but don't smell any coffee in this. I do get a very herbal lavender, that reminds my of motel linen (fitting because of the inspiration for this perfume) and it dries down into that amazing musk. This musk is a little brighter(?) than Pronounced but still very good. I huff this scent until my nose wears out.

Conman (chamomile, blueberry, muguet) This blueberry.....I usually find blueberries too tart and sour, but this smells the way I want blueberries to taste. It's sweet, but not sugary. It's nicely supported by the herbiness of the chamomile. Kinda like a dried grass smell. I'm also very tickled by the name of this. I'm unfamiliar with the character it's based on, but I wear this when I want my own conman confidence.

And I will cut my rambles there for now! I'm not sure if this answers the question of what sorts are my favorites, cuz the only real pattern I've noticed in my collection is that I like mint and (some) musks. And I like metal and leather scents for summer. Thanks again for the excuse to ramble!

[lokeansuz]

my recent herby favs

howdy all, i'm trying a new thing where i'm writing about my herbal practice on my blog. i've been working with a number of plants for a while now and have developed a few close relationships. a note that i am a baby herbalist and not a medical practitioner, and i can not and do not want to give medical or personalized herbal advice to you in this format. this is my experience with these herbs in my body, every body is different so your mileage may vary. this is just me exploring the ways these plants have felt in my body! i am sharing potential medical risks about these herbs both as practice and so that if you seek these herbs out you are informed. i cannot stress this enough, talk to your doctor if you have medications that can interact with these herbs! i feel an abundantly cautious take is appropriate as i am posting to a broad audience. i encourage you to read the post in full. if this is well received, perhaps i will add to the post!

wood betony - stachys officinalis - cool, dry, relaxing - this is a cooling relaxant nervine that i started working with 4 months ago or so, perhaps longer? this plant is an excellent ally to any grounding practice. this is a big portion of the tea my mentor Kenton Cobb formulated, which is how i was introduced to stachys. the tea they formulated i have dubbed the "you are here" tea. i think betony being a big part of it really drove that formula. but the idea is that you are neither back there on the trail, nor up ahead yet. you are here on the map. while it's good to consider the past's context, and to plan for the future, you are here, man! take it in. i associate this herb with the rune jara, which i associate heavily with enjoying the moment. this herb is also known as a warding herb. i found that my gut intuition was a lot easier to listen to when i had this tea. maybe that's a coincidence, but i do feel it helped me tune in to my body better. the taste is mildly bitter, and easy to drink as is or cover with rose, lavender, tulsi, chamomile, hibiscus and a number of other herb friends. i find betony to be most supportive to the "trauma doom spiral" as i call it. i have ptsd and can experience intense symptoms like flashbacks. i find that betony, especially when formulated with rose, linden and tulsi (read further down to cinnamon's blood sugar warning, this herb acts that way, too), really help settle me back down enough to think through what i need to do to take care of myself. i've also noticed this plant to settle my stomach when taken as a simple! my favorite way to consume betony is in a strong infusion. i have tried anywhere from 5g to 30g infused into a quart french press for anywhere between 30 minutes and 2 plus hours of steeping. an overnight infusion, while strong, is a great way to start the day. especially paired with a mindful yoga practice. my mentor Kenton also recommended to me to pair this herb with a moment of box breathing and my goodness, it is relieving. also consider starting it at the beginning of your day, and come home to betony's open arms. there is an old saying... sell your coat, buy betony! i will say, i could have bought a nice coat with how much money i have spent on betony up to this point. i would highly recommend this herb as an addition to an herbal and witchy practice!

(source: https://rotarybotanicalgardens.org/wood-betony-stachys-officinalis/)

ginger - zingiber officinale - warm, dry, relaxing i have been working with this plant basically since i started with my school in winter of 2022. oh my goodness do i love this plant, and i have a Story. the first time i made this zingy tincture, i made it as a simplers from fresh with 95% everclear which was a Choice for sure. the heat of ginger coupled with the hot hot nature of strong alcohol, woo! and i made like. a 4 cups of tincture so i am very slowly working through it. i usually take .5-1 tsp of tincture and pour a few tablespoons of water and take a shot. i find this herb amazing and work with it with a bunch of applications. i love ginger when i am experiencing pelvic cramping or gut cramping. frankly, the pelvic floor is all bound up in its innervation as i have learned from my ob/gyn. it can be hard to distinguish low gas cramping or constipation pain from bladder pain from uterine pain. it's interesting and rather annoying for those of us with lots of pelvic tension. mine is a result of my hrt, the pelvic floor has the capacity to effectively 'hulk out' on T. one could say that ginger is a very trans friendly herb. it can also increase circulation down there which can relieve menstrual cramping, internally as well as externally. for those who feel dysphoria due to cramping as a reminder of manstruation, ginger is a great ally. anyways, i find anything feeling crampy and achey down in that bowl of pain is eased by ginger. especially when paired with 5-10 drops of lobelia tincture (lobelia inflata). this dose, paired with ginger, applies to menstrual cramping in my body. though i am a big body and take 10-15 drops of lobelia. be mindful that lobelia is nauseating in high doses, (7-10+ drops for most) but some can be nauseated with just a few drops. i encourage you to experiment with low doses (3-5 drops, lower if you get sick easy) before bumping up to maintain comfort. GINGER! i also love ginger for its topical relaxant properties, i have applied the tincture and the paste (literally from the grocery store) before , and it feels nice and warming as well as relaxing. be mindful if you do this to pay attention to how it feels on your body, if it gives a burning sensation then definitely remove it. i also take this herb for nausea induced by my medications, but have taken it for nausea caused by illness as well. a decoction brewed of fresh rhizome (a thumb of fresh thin slices or grated) for 30 minutes on a simmer. i love to pick and choose and brew any of the following: honey, green tea, chamomile, rose, tulsi (blood sugar warning), linden, cinnamon (blood sugar warning), chai spices in general and using it to flavor just about anything a little icky. looking at you, elecampane. this tea is wonderful for when i am feeling particularly gassy and tight in my abdomen. to top it all off, when i work with ginger, i let go just a little. it can take the edge off of my tension in 1+ tsp doses. cook it into food to dispel gas before you have it! curries, ginger baked goods, infused honey and candied ginger is another of my favorites for similar reasons as the tea. and they are delightful! a medicine in its own right. i also love the way this herb builds heat in my body. ifi really want to raise energy, like for a walk in the cold rain, i will do a shot of dilute tincture to get myself going. perhaps a way to raise energy in a witchy way? hmm... a warning: taking medicinal doses of this herb can thin the blood, do not take this if you are on blood thinning medications! also, if you are prone to overheating (i am because of certain medications) or have a hot and/or dry constitution, balance this herb with cooling moistening herbs such as... LINDEN!

(source: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ginger)

linden - tilia americana - cool, moist, relaxant

oh i sing my praises to thee, linden! though this mild taste may not wow you, this plant is profoundly relaxing to the nerves and hydrating to the tissues of the body. i love this tea as a long infusion, i have brewed linden usually in quantities of 5-10 grams in a quart french press. i pour over boiling water, stick it in the fridge, and fetch it after a day at work or overnight. also known as basswood, i love to brew linden with rose and cinnamon. (mind cinnamon, it has insulin lowering capacity, you gotta watch your blood sugar closely while taking this herb and work with your doctor and if you can't feasibly do that, i would not work with it). back to linden, i find that this herb is best for me after a long day, especially one where i have been overwhelmed and on the fritz. actually, better yet, i prefer to drink it when i expect to have a bullshitty day. it seems to ward off the worst of my tension, emotionally and physiologically. this herb is beautifully moistening, i like to let it thicken (naturally occurring polysaccharides cause this effect). it is most moistening when steeped in a long infusion. i find that when i drink it regularly, my lips are smooth, my cuticles are nice and pretty, and i am less prone to dehydration headaches. i often forget to drink enough, i have trouble paying attention to my body's cues due to being neurodivergent. if you are like me that way, and forget to drink enough, this tea can help compensate for that. i find that a relaxing nervine like this can also bring you down into your body and help you pay better attention to it. the effect is twofold! i have not worked with linden as a tincture yet, for i seek the moistening qualities the most. i have also worked with this tea topically and with the marc in a cheesecloth on my eczema. the cooling moistening properties help to soften and soothe the irritation. often, i get screwed with topical fragrance because i am extremely sensitive and sometimes my only soap option in a public restroom gives me eczema for a week booo) but linden helps! so does my topical salve, i will have to write a post about it sometime soon. linden has tended to my anxiety gently, i find that at work this tea is nice to sip when suzanne is going off about how terrible vaccines are, how trees move at night (really! there was a facebook video!) and the dangers of hrt. so yeah if that made you scrunch your face up remembering a coworker, this tea may be for you. it may also be for you if you feel frazzled and restless after a long day, as it can soothe that nervous tension that keeps you tossing and turning at night. this tea is also supportive to the cardiovascular system. i have to wonder if the primary way the linden eases anxiety is through relaxing the cardiovascular system and soothing the heart. it's an amphoteric, it can bring down blood pressure when necessary, and raise it when it is lower. last but not least, this herb (a tree, but trees are herbs i think!) smells wonderful and looks beautiful. it blooms in june in my area and walking beneath them is magical. stick your face in some blossoms if you ever get the chance.

(source: me!)

anyways, these are a few of my favorite herbs these days. i hope that you enjoyed reading and perhaps gleaned some ideas from this podcast. i want to promote the school i study at, check out commonwealth holistic herbalism's school site and find their podcast on spotify! and apple i think? i don't use it.

take really good care of yourselves <3

[major2501]

My First Coven: We Didn't Start The Fire

 Auntie M and I had found a pretty nice cafe in town to have a bit of lunch. Dinner as Auntie M called it as where she was from it went; breakfast, dinner and tea and not breakfast, lunch and dinner. We were sat in a cosy booth away from a lot of the other cafe diners with some huge elegant looking sandwiches, if sandwiches could be elegant. I had tuna salad on brown and Auntie M had cheddar cheese and salad on malted brown. The bread was fresh and tasted amazing; all washed down with large lattes. I sat with a bunch of bags beside me, one with my new spell book in and a few more with various other bits and bobs Auntie M had bought for me. She had bought me some different coloured candles, some essential oils of peppermint, chamomile, lavender, tea tree and sandalwood, some dried herbs; basil, mint, sage and thyme, a small bottle of almond carrier oil and a few cute little bottles with screw tops.

'Fresh herbs work better in most cases, but dried herbs are fine when you're stuck.' She told me.

I had asked her loads more questions whilst we were eating. Like what we had to do as witches, were we allowed to tell anyone, had my Auntie M come across anything really horrible she had to get rid of.

'Hmm a few years ago me and the coven had to exorcize a particularly nasty demon from a woman in Northampton. She was a parishioner of St Mary's which was kind of funny at the time but even the vicar couldn't get the damn thing out of her. He called a friend of his who called another friend who contacted us.'

'And did you get the demon out?' I asked, hanging on her every word and pausing to take a bite of my sandwich.

'Of course we did. It wasn't easy though. The lady had more than a few chinks in her armour so the demon was clinging to her like shit to a blanket. Turns out she had quite the shady past and the guilt had caught up with her.'

'Wow. What did you do?'

'Drew the demon out and banished it. Simples.'

I was a little bit gobsmacked after hearing that, then Auntie M carried on talking.

'I'm not just here to take you through your early witch years Maddie, I have to tell you this.'

'What do you mean.'

'Well,' Auntie M said, laying her sandwich down on her plate, 'Your school is surprisingly magical and not in a good way.'

I frowned. 'What do you mean by that?'

'It appears to be a beacon for bad juju. You'll feel it soon enough now your abilities have manifested but I think it has something to do with your old chemistry teacher dying, the whole place has some jumbled up vibes.'

'Mrs Clarkson? How so?' I was puzzled now.

'I think she was a guardian of your school. She had been there a long time am I right?' Auntie M asked me.

'Yeah quite a long time.'

'That's interesting because none of us in the community or coven actually knew about her. She may have been a covenless witch. We also have a tendency to keep our powers under wraps especially from strangers or warlocks, we don't really get on with warlocks that well.'

I was learning even more now.

'Not all witches belong to a coven, not all witches are good and the same goes for warlocks. We keep ourselves to ourselves as the bad ones of our kind would rather prefer our powers be theirs. In fact that may even be the first spell I tech you, especially because you're a new witch your powers are gonna be all over the place.'

Auntie M wiped her hands on a napkin and signalled for me to reach mine over to her. She held my hands in hers and closed her eyes.

'Just breath normally for now Maddie and do what I say.'

I tried to breathe normally like she asked me to but her hands were doing weird things. One second they would feel blazingly hot and then instantly they would turn freezing cold. This happened for about thirty seconds.

'Hmm you've got some pretty erratic energy but this should be an easy fix for you, you're not emitting much radiant energy but the closer I get to you physically the more noticeable it is.'

I looked at my hands as my Aunt spoke, wondering what she had just done. She pointed to the bag that had my new spell book in it, gesturing for me to get it out as she rummaged around in her handbag for a pen which she slid over to me.

'Write these words down okay? "May my powers be quiet, from those who cause harm, may my energy recede and not cause alarm. My power is mine, they will not know, my power is mine, it will not show." You got that?'

I nodded as I scribbled down the words quickly but neatly in my book.

'Another thing you can do so you don't have to chant that several times a day is mix a few drops each of some lavender oil, tea tree and chamomile oil in to one of those little bottles filled halfway with the carrier oil. Give it a good shake and say the chant while you're mixing it. It's good for repelling negative energy but boosting it with the chant should help keep your powers from going mental. Just rub a drop between your wrists.'

I scribbled the recipe down in my book in clear writing. My very first spell.

Auntie M smiled at me.

'Once you get a bit more confident you can start making your own spells.' She said as she finished off her sandwich. 'And when I've taught you a few more of the basics, I'll let you use the family spell book. How does that sound?'

We finished our lunch and shopping trip and soon made our way back to the school around two o'clock. Auntie M found a large gate that led in to the forest that surrounded the school and pulled up her BMW near it.

'Come on, get your stuff and bring it with you.' Auntie M said to me. For some reason she was rummaging around in her glove box and brought out a folding map of the UK. She shoved it under her arm and slung her handbag over her shoulder. She locked her car and motioned for me to follow her. We walked for a little bit and eventually came to a clearing in the woods, I think it was the same clearing I wandered out to the other night. My Auntie M began gathering twigs and fallen branches and stacked them in a fairly large circle of stones that was obviously used for previous bonfires. She turned away and vaguely shook her fingers at the collection of wood which erupted in a mass of flames. I stood there watching, stunned by her simple gesture that created this sudden display of light and heat.

I looked behind me to where Auntie M was now sat on an old school twin settee, drinking from a mug in one of her hands while handing me a mug with her other hand, which I graciously took. She was instantly willing all this stuff in to creation. She snapped her fingers and a small wooden coffee table appeared out of nowhere in front of the settee. She patted the neat next to her, motioning for me to sit down. I placed my mug down on the coffee table and my bags on my knee.

'Get one of your candles out. Put it on the table.'

I did as she instructed. It was a simple white tealight.

'Okay so now I'll teach you some basic fire magic. It's easiest to do when you have fire around you it helps you concentrate.'

The fire was actually really nice, especially as today hadn't been particularly warm or sunny. And it was getting a bit chilly as the day went on.

'So, lets try this first.' Auntie M started. 'Relax, concentrate on the candle wick. Not too hard though, acknowledge that it's there. Feel the warmth and the light emitting from the bonfire. Think about it in your mind and how it makes you feel. Think about what a flame does to candles, ask it to light or even point at it. You want that candle to light and it won't do it itself without your energy, intent and a bit of imagination.'

I tried to follow what she was saying but I was struggling to concentrate a bit and it was making my brow furrow. I sighed thinking it was pretty fruitless but a little stream of smoke crept up from the candle wick. I jumped back in my seat then looked at Auntie M.

'Carry on.' She smiled and carried on drinking from her mug as she got her phone out and started scrolling through her social medias. I must have concentrated, and strained and made smoke come off the candle wick and even spoke to it for another fifteen minutes or so before I wanted to give up. Auntie M was now on to her second magical brew by now and had been chuckling away at something on Reddit.

'Auntie M, I can't do it.' I complained. She dropped her head to the side and looked at me as if I was an idiot. She put her mug down and shifted the candle in front of her on the table. She made a gun gesture with her right hand and pointed at the candle which instantly lit. She then wafted her hand which made the candle go out. She raised her hand up again and the bonfires flames went up at least another six feet higher than they already were.

'That what I did there, takes practice. Here, lets try a different way.'

She picked up the candle and placed it in my hand.

'Close your eyes and clear your mind. Think of darkness.'

'Okay.'

'Now imagine this little candle, imagine the wick starting to char then imagine it flickering to life with fire.'

I did exactly as she said. I tried to regulate my breathing thinking it may do some good and help me to relax.

'Is the candle burning bright in your mind Maddie?'

'The flame is swaying.' I whispered.

'Open your eyes.'

I did what she told me to. I looked down at the tealight in my hand and noticed that it was alight, the flame was swaying. I gasped as I held the tealight out in my palm. Auntie M just smiled at me.

'Okay, now blow it out without blowing it out. Use your imagination.' Auntie M went back to her brew, I could feel her gaze on me as I closed my eyes again; imagining the lit candle in my mind. I tried to picture myself blowing the candle out in one blow and the residual smoke drifting up. I opened my eyes to find the candle had gone out.

'I did that? I mean did you blow it out when I had my eyes closed?' I asked, Auntie M just shook her head. I was beaming at what I just did and was pretty pleased with myself.

'I want you to keep practising this one and push yourself to do it differently when you master it one way. It's different for everyone, but I think you have concentration issues. You try too hard to start with.'

That was an interesting way to put it. I thought. She was kinda right though, I did have a tendency to try hard at new things but then I'd usually give up soon after if I didn't get the hang of it pretty quick.

'Okay. This one should be fun.' Auntie M downed the rest of her drink and sat the mug down on the coffee table. She unfolded the map of the UK and spread it out over the table. She then started digging about in her handbag and brought out a pretty pointed amethyst crystal attached to a long silver chain. She shook the chain out and handed it to me.

'This one should be pretty easy, mainly because we're blood related. But I'm gonna teleport somewhere and I want you to find me. Hold the crystal by the chain over the map and use your instinct on this one. Chant, ask the crystal to find me, whatever feels natural to you. I'f you don't find me in ten minutes I'll come back.'

'How will you know I've found you though?' I questioned, the tasked seemed a bit weird and she wasn't giving me any more to go on.

'Oh, I'll know.' She grinned. I blinked and within that split second she had disappeared. I sat up slightly shocked that Auntie M had literally vanished and left me in the middle of the woods sat on a settee she had conjured out of nowhere along with a bunch of other furniture being warmed by a big bonfire she didn't take a gallon of diesel to, to get roaring away like it was. I sighed. I tried to remember some of my favourite films and TV shows that had witches and spells in them then remembered I had seen this kind of magic somewhere before. I held the amethyst crystal out over the map with my right hand, the point of the crystal about an inch away from the surface. I let my shoulders slump down in an attempt to release the tension in my body. Noticing my Auntie M had left her handbag on the settee I rummaged in there and found her car keys. I gripped them in my left hand and closed my eyes. I tried to imagine my Auntie M in my head as the imagination technique seemed to be working quite well. I slowly breathed in and out and started to whisper; "Where are you Auntie M?"

I repeated this a few times and I could feel my hands warm up and start to tingle slightly in my fingertips. I gradually opened my eyes and saw that the tip of the crystal was pointing to the left side of the map, the silver chain pulled taught from my hand. I leaned over a touch to read where the crystal was hovering over.

'Blackpool?' I said aloud wondering why Auntie M would teleport to Blackpool. As soon as I said it, she was advancing toward me with two double ninety-nine ice creams in her hands, complete with flakes sticking out of them and slathered with raspberry sauce.

''Ere ya kiddo.' Auntie M handed me one as she started to tidy up her own ice cream which was beginning to dribble down the sides then sat down next to me.

It was September, I was a brand new witch sat in the middle of a forest in Hertfordshire, sitting on a magical settee, with a magical bonfire eating a Mr. Whippy ice cream that my witch Aunt had just teleported all the way from Blackpool.

It was an odd situation. So I did the most normal thing I could think of and just ate my ice cream.  

[pokemonruby]

HI FRIEND!!!! i had a rough day.. can u tell me abt my beloved adopted son wren? :3c im curious abt food!! hes a prince, so he probably has access to Good Food He Likes…. so what does he eat generally? what does he /love/? whats a treat? snack? what does he give his love? and… for the love of all that is holy……… can he create any food all by himselfie >:3c ??

i'm sorry you had a rough day sky! i am always happy to talk about your adopted son though so hopefully i can cheer you up a bit hehe.

wren does indeed have access to many a fine cuisine given his status as the saint of the asterian orthodoxy (or in other words, prince. emperor. even though he's not much more than a figurehead, he's still treated fairly well... canopus likes to pretend he's just a pawn for his malicious schemes but he's just a tsundere who actually cares very deeply about this messed up found family he's gathered among the lotus-eaters.) but ahem. going on a tangent. wren first and foremost is a HUGE connoisseur of tea, and he's constantly throwing tea parties for him and his buddies within the lotus-eaters (with sisyphus, dionysus, and nemesis indulging him the most out of the bunch.) his favorite blends are naturally floral-based, like lavender chamomile, rosebuds or hibiscus, as examples. he's also very fond of honey so he tries to include it in almost all of his meals in some capacity. :3

as for actual dishes, confections pair well with tea so he revels in them quite a bit, and he has access to very expensive types, of course. of them all i think he'd likely enjoy macarons and baklava the most (asteros is heavily inspired by greece, so he is treated to the latter quite frequently since canopus is also a fan of them, and since it's rare to catch him in a good mood wren tries to enthrall him with the prospect of fine sweets to win his attention haha.) on that note, just any general mediterranean cuisine you can think of is what wren and his fellow lotus-eaters are treated to on a daily basis, naturally. (though i would say wren is a borderline vegetarian; that is, outside of milk and eggs - that's all right in his book, but if it's straight-up meat he's a little apprehensive, considering his profound adoration for nature.) so most of his primary meals are green and very healthy despite his over-fixation on sweets.

and no, for the love of all that is holy do not let this boy near a kitchen. he's so clumsy he'll trip over completely nothing sometimes; can you imagine him next to a burning stovetop? the one time he tried to cook a meal for his buddies it nearly resulted in the cradle of heaven (the name of his castle/the lotus-eaters' HQ) exploding. canopus vowed to prohibit all kitchen access henceforward.

and here is a tiny wren (minus his pink highlights & his flower pupils -- neither are options on most of the makers i've discovered unfortunately) to hopefully perk up your mood. you can't tell because of his hair but he's wearing a beret with dropping bunny ears.

[lured-into-wonderland]

She wanted to accept every and each word that Sevren was giving her. She needed (to hear) them. Nunnally needed to be reassured that she was safe. That Sevren was safe. That she was forgiven all the wrong things she had done in his dreamscape. And that Sevren would still trust her. Although she was aware that might not be possible. Or at least not just t h e n. Trust was something one had to earn. Especially after what happened just a mere moments ago.

Yes, they were both tired. Perhaps even exhausted. Sevren definitely more than her; and yet it seemed he was there for her.

“Is it really the truth…?” – her voice was, indeed, laced with surprise that she had not realized it earlier – “Yes, I was brought to you…” – and unfortunately to Zale in a way – “But what could that mean?”

It was a reassuring thought, but also a sad one. So was Sevren a safe destination for her inner demon? Someone who might heal her? But she didn’t want Sevren to be just that. She wanted to believe he was her choice…

…her friend…

…her first date…

“I wish you were something more than just a fate…” – her blue eyes looked into his blue for a short moment. Then Nunnally sighed; her life was never what she desired. She should have already get used to it. At least Sevren did give her some wonderful memories that she would hold dear for her long life. Moments they enjoyed together. That brought a small smile on her lips.

“Tea would be nice.” – she smiled at him; only now did the girl feel how tired and thirsty she was. Only then she started to feel safe in his home. Far away from Zale. Far away from her father. Far away from everything and everyone. Like a safe place give to her...for some time. Nunnally stood up: --

“I’ll show you what I am the moment you’re ready. The moment you’d like to see my…” – powers? Curse? Gift? – “…the bare me…”

“…or perhaps the thing that other always wanted…”

"...depending how you phrase it..."

There Nunnally stopped realizing she drifted too far from the teatime she truly wanted to focus on.: --

“What’s your favourite tea blend?”

“Have you ever tried lavender and chamomile?”

"He's not worth talking to. Just the mouth of a sinister snake. He has no understanding of emotions, or humanity. He only cares about his goal."

[ No matter the cost. Even if it erases this world. Perhaps it is foolish that I hope for the day he will change, and we can be friends. We are part of the same being... ]

[ But unlike him I used to be human. ]

Sevren watched the runic markings flow along the walls, snapping himself out from his wonderings. He could easily get lost in thought if he allowed it.

"... Thank you. Please trust me when I say it can not happen. It took me a very long time to bind him like I have."

He is unable to do it again.

They've grown close in their time together-- But there is still much Sevren does not know about her. He is someone who has faith in his knowledge. Her words are comforting, and he wished to accept them... Yet there are still seeds of doubt, all thanks to Zale. Secrets that he is not yet aware of.

Not knowing makes him place a guard up. But none of this is her fault; that's what he believes.

"Please don't cry. I meant to assure you when I said you were safe, not to make you cry again."

Sevren reached out to pat her head.

"Ignore me. A lot has happened and I an quite drained. I am a little on edge as a result."

"..."

"Probably. He wouldn't have reached out to you for now reason."

It's frusting. Zale likely only knows of her because they met. He would have learned about her through Sevren's own Dreamscape; the beings prison.

Zale has been able to see something that Sevren has missed. Such is the skill of one closer to the Time God than he is. But Sevren prefers holding into his humanity.

"Hm?"

Her turn away, her increasing tears-- More was going on here. Indeed, this went beyond Zale. So all Sevren desired to do was listen as she spoke. He never once forced her to look at him, and despite being tired, he took in every word.

"All that you've been through has led you here, to me."

"I am one of time. This is not by chance. This is the hand of Lady Fate... and her mercy, for now."

Taking a breath, Sevren made himself stand, slowly.

"It sounds like your father saved you."

"I'm not looking to use you for power, or anything. So don't worry there. You don't need to show me either... I know how dangerous the sands can be if misused."

Sevren also knows that the answers he seeks will likely show themselves eventually. There is no reason to push each other while they're both so worn down.

"Ah, look, we've just got back. We're safe."

"Let's sit down with some tea and rest, how about it?"

[134340am]

i love daichi so much i’m going to. eat my fist

[alliealert202]

BNHA cuddling head canons because I’m *yearning*

This post doubles as what I think they would smell like. I also tried writing headcanons for Deku and Shoto for the first time, so enjoy :)

Tamaki Amajiki

I’ve said it once and I will say it again: Tamaki switches between being the big spoon and the little spoon. He especially likes it when you lay on his chest - any cuddle position that makes him feel like he’s protecting you always calms him down. However, when he’s had a hard day, his head is straight in your lap. Play with his hair, too. He will melt. 

I don’t think he would be a big cologne user. If anything, he would use aromatherapy to help with his anxiety, which would leave a lingering scent of vanilla, chamomile and lavender on his clothes and skin. This combined with the warmth and softness of his hold is always enough to send you into a peaceful slumber. 

Shoto Todoroki 

Todoroki is comfortable. He enjoys having your head in his lap while he listens to you talk about your day and plays with your hair - but on days where he wants nothing more than to feel you, he will be your big spoon and will not let go anytime soon. Often, you will find him absent-mindedly running his fingers up and down your spine, tracing patterns onto your back above your clothes or pyjamas. 

I don’t know why, but I feel like he would smell like a really specific combination of green tea and cedarwood. It’s just a very calming, warm scent that always makes you feel safe. 

Mirio Togata

Right off the bat, Mirio smells so good - His cologne has a much sweeter scent than most, causing you to become enveloped in amber and jasmine like a warm hug. 

On that note, he is an absolute teddy bear of a man and a god tier big spoon. If you need that extra little bit of comfort, he will give you one of his oversized hoodies, and his arms are wrapped around your neck and lower back while your head rests in the space between his shoulder and chest. If you would prefer not to be in his arms, he will play guitar and sing to you while your head rests on his shoulder and you hum along to the songs. 

Izuku Midoriya

Like Tamaki, Izuku enjoys any cuddle position that makes him feel like he is protecting you. But when things get to him, there’s something about being the little spoon that just hits differently. He loves the feeling of being wrapped up in your arms - to him, it’s equivalent to free-falling into a safety net. A very close second is sitting between your legs with his head on your chest while you play with his hair, but he immediately falls asleep. 

Out of his hero costume, Izuku smells like cinnamon and pine. It’s a similar smell to walking into a fire-lit living room at Christmas, and it never fails to make you feel at home. 

[shallowseeker]

///

Rowena insists that there are absolutely no traces of magic.

Nevertheless, she tries lots of simple spells and and potions.

In the end, she recommends Alexa’s “Goodnight Classical music list,” hot tea mixed with local honey, and a long, "luxurious" bubble bath with a side helping of Epsom salts.

(But she promises to keep researching in case the insomnia doesn’t abate.)

///

Jack is starting to get very worried. He’d read that just twenty-four hours without sleep is comparable to having a blood alcohol content of 0.1%, which is above the legal limit for driving. And he’d also read that humans might die without sleep.

Jack is ashamed. His lack of control is just another failure in a long list of failures.

He'd thought that he was mostly human now, and that his grace was supposed to be recuperating--lying dormant. (He knows he's not completely human, because supernatural creatures still clock him as "angel," and he still doesn't need much sleep.)

So, had he accidentally tapped into his soul? (Cas would be furious if so.)

Either way, it's more evidence that he's got poor control--that even when he's weak, he's still a liability to their hunting team.

He has to fix this on his own. He has to.

So, he starts researching his own potions. He’s no Rowena, but the internet has a lot to say about sleep, Benadryl, and Melatonin.

///

By day four without sleep, Dean seems on the verge of tears.

///

He seems very offended when Cas offers to run him a "luxurious" bubble bath.

///

An hour later, Cas runs one anyway.

He seems to box Dean in as he bullies him down the hallway and into the room with the clawfoot tub.

///

Jack is investigating the magnolia, chamomile, lavender, and passion flower-flavored teas for his sleep potion when Cas reappears in the kitchen.

He peers suspiciously at the teabags in Jack’s hands.

“You were eavesdropping when Rowena was here last night, weren’t you,” he says with a raised eyebrow. "Which means you know about Dean's problem."

Jack actually hadn’t been, but he feigns guilt. “Uh, Yeah. Do you really think the tea'll help him?"

Cas seems to buy it. “Rowena says it might," he sighs. "But here. Let's make it anyway."

Instead of putting a saucepan on the stove, Cas opts for tap water in a ceramic mug and heats the whole thing with one steady palm. Jack stares at his hand wistfully, missing that kind of angelic power control.

“So...which tea?” Jack whispers, trying not to fidget.

“She suggested chamomile and valerian root.”

Jack hands over the chamomile bag in his hands and doubles back to the shelf to search for valerian root. When he finds it, he hands it over too and watches as Cas dips it into the steamy water. Next, he watches Cas squeeze a generous helping of honey into the brew.

“Why don’t you take this to him?” Cas suggests. “I’ll be there after I check in with Sam.”

Without giving him time to respond, Cas shoves the mug forward and stalks off towards the library. Jack hmmphs and resigns himself to facing Dean.

But first...he takes advantage of this perfect opportunity.

A tiny voice at the back of his brain urges caution--urges him to check in with Cas first--or to run the potion by Sam. It urges him to come clean about the little insomnia curse he'd accidentally set on Dean.

He squashes the doubt.

After all, if the potion works like it's supposed to, everything will go back to normal. And Jack had carefully read over the ingredients several times and checked with the Internet to make sure it'd be okay.

So, he takes a deep breath and adds dissolved Benadryl and ZZZQuill to the tea. He stirs it in with a teaspoon, tastes it to make sure it hasn't mucked up the flavor too much, adds a bit more honey, and heads down the hallway.

///

The door to the “spa room” is wide open, so Jack lets himself in without announcing.

Dean is reclining in the tub, eyes completely shut and nearly obscured by a cartoonish pile of soap bubbles. He’s got a blue towel-turban on his head. If you ask Jack, it seems like a stupid thing to wear in the bathtub. (And Jack doesn’t know why someone with hair as short as Dean’s would even need a head-towel in the first place.)

Dean looks like he might’ve fallen asleep, which could be a very good thing so long as he doesn't slump over and drown in the soapy water.

There’s a small stool pulled up near the head of the tub, so Jack decides to perch on it and wait him out. Even a few minutes of micro-sleep would be be good for Dean, right?

Alas, he's awake.

He seems to know that Jack's here, too, because his hand shoots out over the edge of the edge of the tub and makes a claw-like, grabby motion.

Jack tests the temperature of the ceramic mug to make sure it’s not too hot before setting it in Dean’s open palm. With an exaggerated noise of displeasure, Dean clasps it and brings it up to his mouth. Jack holds his breath, hoping Dean can't taste the secret medicine he'd added.

“S’ok for flowery shit,” he murmurs, so softly a regular person might struggle to hear it. Then, Dean suddenly furrows his brow, twists his mouth and juts his lower lip out. “Hot, though.”

(Jack gets the sense he’s complaining just to complain.)

"Hot," he repeats, more petulantly this time.

Jack frowns and doesn’t say anything back.

After a few seconds, Dean sighs and leans his neck way back like he’s stretching it. He looks kind of silly, to be honest, like he's Littlefoot reaching for a Tree Star. Keeping his eyes closed, Dean extends the mug out and sort-of demands, “Put an ice cube in it?”

Jack blinks. Maybe it’s the sleep deprivation, but Dean’s acting weird.

He even sounds kind of weird.

Annoyed, Jack blurts, “Why don’t you just wait a few minutes? It’ll cool off on its own.”

Dean’s red-rimmed eyes shoot open, like he’s been electrocuted, and the water sloshes as he rockets upright. He retracts his neck and tucks it in, like he’s a sea turtle, and he sputters. “K-kid?!”

Jack frowns at him in confusion.

Dean sniffs, recovering quickly. “Cas said he was makin’ me tea.”

As if summoned, Cas appears at the doorway. “And Cas did make you tea,” he sasses, striding in. He nods at Jack. “Thank you for bringing it, Jack.”

“You’re welcome,” Jack says pointedly, eyes pinning on Dean.

If Cas weren’t in the room right now, Jack might be tempted to tell Dean to stop being a big baby. (But well, Cas is in the room, and it’s kind of Jack's fault Dean’s stuck with insomnia to begin with. So, he opts not to say anything else.)

Dean coughs and mumbles something that sounds like, “Whatever. Thanks, kiddo.”

Cas strides further into the room, but before Jack can vacate the stool, Cas opts to sit, perfectly balanced, on the edge of the bathtub.

Dean gets a little redder, and then he licks his lips before making a series of small splashes with his opposite hand. To Jack, it looks like he’s renewing the soap-bubble pile.

“Nothing new from Rowena,” Cas reports, clipped and business-like. “She suggests trying to sleep the old-fashioned way. And Sam bought you a 'Sega Starry Cove.' He says it will ‘relax’ you.”

Dean squints. “The fuck is—?”

Jack’s had that in his Amazon cart for ages. “It’s a star projector,” he explains happily. "It makes your ceiling look like the night sky."

It’s expensive, though, which is why Jack never bought it, not even in secret. (Maybe after all this blows over, and if Dean doesn’t like it, Jack can convince him to give it to him instead.)

“Okay, so it's like a juiced-up baby mobile. What’s next, a friggin' crib?”

Straight-faced, Cas fires back, “Actually, I thought we could try Baby Einstein Box Orchestra next.”

Dean rolls his eyes so hard that he almost loses his towel turban, and Cas winks at Jack. Jack is having trouble following their conversation. He knows who Albert Einstein is, but he doesn’t know what he has to do with babies or orchestras.

“What’s Baby Einstein?”

Cas grins. “Before you were born, I read dozens of parenting books.”

(Which doesn’t actually explain anything.)

“Music, kiddo,” Dean huffs. “Lame-ass lullaby music.”

“Oh,” Jack says. “Sounds nice. I mean, anything could help you sleep, couldn't it?”

Dean scoffs. “I’ve tried everything. Short of knocking myself out, anyway, but then...Cas tried that for me.”

Guilt feels like it’s working a hole through Jack's stomach, and he struggles to meet Dean’s eyes.

“Maybe you could try a ThunderShirt or--or a weighted blanket?” he whispers.

Dean misreads his nervousness. “Hey,” he says, softening in a way that makes the guilt squirm even harder in Jack’s gut. “I’ll be okay. I always am, you know?"

Jack swivels his eyes to Cas and finds the same warm reassurance reflected there.

If there were ever a time to come clean, that time is now.

Jack…tries.

“Uh,” he says. But that’s all that comes out. “Let me know if I can help,” he putters out lamely.

(He knows he should tell them the truth.)

If the sleep potion doesn't work tonight, he thinks, then I'll tell them.

Dean clears his throat and cracks a smile. “You can help me with the star laser shit later. K, kid? That'd help me out a ton."

Jack nods.

Satisfied, Dean takes a huge sip of his tea. Then, he makes a theatrical expression of disgust. His mug shoots forward, just as it had earlier, but this time extended towards Cas.

“It got gross n’ lukewarm,” he complains.

Cas looks surprised.

“Is it?”

He takes an experimental sip for himself and shoots Dean a disbelieving stare.

Dean goes pink again.

“Actually, I kinda want iced tea.”

Cas heaves a dramatic sigh and gets to his feet.

“Very well.”

Dean watches him go with an impish smile. (Jack thinks that it’s the same kind of look he gets on his face when he wins a game of Wordle.)

Jack stays to make sure Dean doesn't accidentally fall asleep and drown. Content to sit until Cas returns, he pulls out his phone and continues researching Melatonin. He even asks Google if ThunderShirts work on humans. (According to Google, sometimes humans find the compression soothing; other times, it triggers claustrophobia.)

“What’re ya playin there? Minecraft or somethin?”

Jack freezes, “Uh. No.” He thinks fast and picks a lie that will hopefully bore Dean to tears: “I’m, uh, reading about wind shear and meteorological soundings.”

Dean pulls a predictably faux-horrified face.

“Seriously? That’s gotta be Sam’s doing. Yeesh.”

(Actually, Sam doesn’t like meteorology that much, not outside of demonic omens.)

It works.

Dean doesn't ask any more questions, and he actually seems content to hang out in companionable silence after that.

///

When Cas comes back with iced tea and Dean’s fresh-from-the-dryer gray dead-guy robe, Dean drops his disgruntled act and shines with naked relief.

It makes Jack notice the sunken circles around his eyes. (Hoepfully, the potion will help him with that.)

Cas hands off the iced tea to Dean and makes to take up his perch on the edge of the tub again.

Jack hops up. “Uh, wait, Cas. You can have your seat back now. I'm done 'being the Lifeguard.'"

Dean scowls at the metaphor, but Cas's eyes crinkle in amusement. He nods and retakes his stool.

Jack hovers nearby for a few minutes, wondering what he could possibly do to help. He peers down at where Dean's hands encircle his mug. His fingerpads are super water-logged and wrinkley.

"You're getting really pruney. You should probably get out soon."

"Hey," Dean shoots back, “You're the--prune."

Jack ignores him and crosses the room to grab two fresh towels. He drags over one of the lightweight surgical tables closer to the tub and plops the towels down on the surface.

"Thank you," Cas murmurs, setting the gray robe next to the towels.

"Neither of you should rush me," Dean huffs. "After all, Rowena said I need to relax."

"If I recall correctly, just two hours ago, you refused to entertain the possibility of relaxation, much less a 'girly-ass bubble bath.'"

Dean shoots Cas a cheeky smile and gulps down his tea.

(Cas inspects Dean's throat as he drinks, so Jack looks, too, but he doesn't see anything out of the ordinary.)

Dean finishes with a little "ah!" and hands the empty mug over to Cas. "Well, two hours ago was before I had you two as my royal handmaidens."

Cas sets the empty mug next to the towels.

"If two hours of light pampering makes you this spoiled, I imagine you'd make a rather nightmarish princess."

Jack can't help it. He laughs.

Dean shoots him a glare, and Jack stifles it quickly.

(He'd read that sleep deprivation could make people really cranky, after all.)

“Maybe Sam and I could go get everyone some stuff from Jiffy Burger?”

Cas turns to him in surprise. “That’s very thoughtful, Jack." He beams at him proudly, and the guilt stabs Jack in the gut again.

Dean, likewise, seems to sag with relief. “Yeah, that--that'd be awesome.”

Jack grins and fires off a text to Sam before heading towards the doorway.

Dinner, Jack can do.

In the meantime, the potion can be taking effect, and Dean will hopefully be asleep by evening.

Jack pauses at the threshold. One last time, he contemplates coming clean about the whole fiasco.

"Kid? You okay?"

Jack balks. What would Sam say in this situation?

"I'm fine. Just--"

What would Sam say in this situation?

Jack does his very best Sam: "Just wondering if you need a special order, Your Majesty."

Dean snorts.

"Just the usual, pageboy. And shut the door behind ya."

///

After Jack closes the door, he walks down the hall a little ways, only to stop when he hears Dean and Cas start talking in low, urgent tones. Something about it feels alarming, and he finds himself immediately straining his ears to hear them.

The exhaustion is easier to hear in Dean’s voice now: “You sure you can’t check—”

“I said no.” Cas’s voice is sharp.

“I trust you—”

“Even if you trust me, Dean. I don’t trust me. I don’t have the control I used to have.”

“But Cas, what if?”

What if what, Jack wonders.

The sentence hangs, and they go silent a long time.

Jack's phone pings. (It's from Sam, a messages that urges: "Yeah. Let's hurry and go before the dinner rush.")

But just before Jack gets out of range, he picks up Dean’s voice, “What if something's up with my soul?”

///

Of all the things Dean Winchester has done over the course of their unusual, turbulent lives, Jack Kline has no idea why this Thing in particular is the Thing that annoys him most.

It happens on Tuesdays and Wednesdays, and occasionally on weekends, if case-hunting goes belly-up.

And Jack knows.

He knows that they’re different from one another in this aspect. He knows that Dean cannot fight this one human Thing.

It’s still annoying, though.

///

So, Jack combats the problem.

///

He tries everything, from being extra chatty to turning the TV volume up annoyingly loud. He even pretends to lose his grip on a giant textbook (held suspiciously at waist level) so that it lands like thunder on the bunker floor.

[warcats-cat]

Midnight Sad

A/N: Hi friends! Short time, no see ;) I’m back with another Floof Fic for the incomparable @muppenthings ! This is actually something I used to do with my mom if I had a nightmare or couldn’t sleep; she would bring some tea upstairs and sit with me for a little bit. (I still had to go to school in the morning, which kind of sucked, but oh well.) 

Also, I have a confession to make. I love tea, but I secretly hate chamomile... I just have a lot of lavender teas now that I drink if I’m sad or sleepy. But chamomile is the one most people are familiar with, so that’s what I’ll use here, lol.

Ok, you guys know the drill! Let me know if I missed any tags, and I hope you enjoy your time!

Read on Ao3 Here!

-------

Soft rumbling of thunder surrounded the house, the patter of determined rain filling the rooms with light background noise. Roman had the lights dimmed in respect of the late hour and his rather odd roommates. 

Virgil was standing in the corner, his wings pulled up over him like a cocoon, and he’d solidified into stone. As clear a sign as any that he was sleeping, and it would take a lot more than thunder to wake him. The muppets were all snuggled up in the run he’d built, cuddling in a dark hide away, presumably also asleep. 

Roman just couldn’t fall asleep himself. 

The thunder and rain should have put him right under. It was the perfect level of background noise for a deep and sound snooze. His little garden friends were all safe inside, taking refuge from their tunnels that were beginning to flood from three days of nonstop rain. Roman had a whole two days off of work with nothing to do except relax. 

He just couldn't sleep.

Roman sat on the couch, setting a warm cup of tea on the table and staring into nothing. Lavender and chamomile for resting. And yet here he was, wide awake as the day. 

Roman spent the time wondering about his miniature roommates; the tiny creatures came and went as they pleased, and seemed largely unbothered by his presence. They even, in their own way, helped him tend the garden itself. 

The four were a daily presence now; the one he called Goldie especially. They spent a good ten minutes every morning on his windowsill, brushing their long tufts of fur clean. When Roman first met them, he could tell the little muppet had been struggling. He’d watched from a distance as the other three would pause what they were doing throughout the day to free their long-furred friend from burrs and leaves; and if Roman woke up early enough, he would find the three carefully picking at Goldie’s fur, attempting to groom out knots that had formed in the night. 

Initially, Roman had only bought one little brush on a whim, something recommended for particularly fluffy cats, and propped it up against the wall while setting out a few Saturday treats for the muppets. Goldie had gone crazy, brushing up against the firm bristles and purring like a toy motorboat. When Roman had tried to walk away, thus letting the brush fall from its position, the little thing had growled. He’d stood at the window for an hour, repositioning the brush occasionally for the miniature diva. 

He’d bought more brushes the next day, and built a self-brushing structure under the muppet’s careful guidance. 

The little purple one, Stormy, was also one to visit as often as possible; usually seeking out treats or ways to fight with Virgil. How he’d managed to find Roman’s wallet and then open it and take out money with his miniscule little paws, Roman would never know. But he’d certainly learned not to leave important things sitting around.

Stormy had quite a sweet tooth, and a penchant for making a mess. Roman found himself constantly trying to protect his tea from the little menace, and was waiting for the day he’d have to take down the butterfly feeders because the fluff-ball had figured out what was inside. 

There were two blue muppets, one a darker blue and one lighter. The darker blue he’d nicknamed Sherlock, because the little guy had a tendency to stick his nose in anything that piqued his curiosity. After the phone incident, Roman had taken to getting whatever puzzle toys he could find, trying to keep the little guy occupied. Sherlock clearly very much wanted the cellphone back, but Roman wasn’t about to allow that after the muppet had called his boss, and he definitely couldn’t afford to give the bug one of his own. 

The puzzle toys seemed to be working for now; a variety of both pet and baby toys were hidden away in the artist’s closet, and he would supply a new one when Sherlock got bored with the one he’d had. 

Thankfully, the curious ball of fluff didn’t seem to mind cycling through toys, as long as the puzzle was refreshed. And Virgil occasionally helped; setting out things for the muppet to find throughout the yard, leaving clues pointing towards new toys and treasures. Although Roman still needed to talk to the gargoyle about maybe not hiding things on the roof. 

The falling treat ball had really hurt when it smacked into his skull.

It was clear, whatever they were, that all four of the muppets were excellent climbers; constantly crawling up the brickwork of the house, wandering along tree branches and occasionally the edge of the fence. If they put their mind to it, they could probably scale the smooth walls inside the house. 

Roman was pulled from his thoughts by soft chirping, and he turned to find the littlest of the muppets, the light blue one he’d been calling Heart based on one of his markings. Heart had climbed the coffee table and was now huddled up in a ball and watching him. This muppet was usually cheery and friendly; the one most likely to wander close to Roman when he worked in the garden, playing with his tiny toy watering can or chasing a feather wand; but tonight, in the dimly lit living room, he almost looked scared. 

The little thing had his hackles raised like a cat’s, the pale blue fluff down his back puffed up. In the dark, he looked more like Stormy than himself. His eyes were glossier than usual, as well, and his ears pulled down in submission, instead of backwards in aggression. 

Well, technically Roman was guessing at a lot of it. He’d learned a lot of their expressions and their body language, but there was still a bit of a learning curve involved.

Roman wondered then, what must he look like in the low light, combined by the flashing and noise of the storm. He carefully set down his teacup, and laid his hand palm up, halfway between them, trying to keep slow for the little guy. 

“Hey, muppet.” he greeted softly, “It’s just me. See?” He wiggled his fingers a little as Heart came closer; the little creature immediately nuzzled against his hand and purred once close enough. Roman noticed, though, that the sound was off; there were interruptions like hiccups, and his ears were still pulled down. 

Roman carefully flipped his hand over, and Heart crawled right into the little tunnel shape he created. Roman could feel tiny heartbeats and a slight shivering. He ran his thumb over the creature’s head, which caused Heart to lean into the touch. 

“What’s wrong, little buddy?” Roman asked softly, continuing to pet his tiny friend. “Is it the storm?”

Heart stopped for a minute to look up and tilt his head in question, before shaking it.

No. Not the thunder then.

Roman sighed, giving the muppet a slightly rueful smile as he went back to stroking Heart’s ears. 

“Just sad, then? Can’t sleep?” he asked.

Heart squeaked sadly, and the hiccup noise returned; probably their form of crying. They sat like that for a while, with muppet resolutely staying in the curl of his hand, and Roman carefully stroking the unmoving little fluffball. 

After a while, he looked down at his tea and sighed again. 

“Yeah. Me too.” he said softly. “Sometimes I guess, you’re just sad.” He looked back to Heart, who churred in response and bumped his little head against the underside of Roman’s fingers. It was sweet; thinking that this little creature from the garden was sad and still wanted to comfort him too. He smiled softly, and carefully removed his hand, much to Heart’s disappointment.

“Sorry, one second. Let me get something.” he said softly, and the creature seemed to understand. Heart curled up next to the loop of the warm teacup to watch as Roman moved to the kitchen. 

He’d found these neat little teacups at the store a few weeks ago; shallow Asian-style dishes that had painted koi fish in them. It was low and shallow enough that Roman had thought it would work for Stormy’s treat on Saturdays, and had worked like a charm for the grumpy (and messy) little nugget. 

His tea was cooled enough, so he set the dish next to Heart and very carefully poured some from his own cup. He dribbled a little on the table, oh well, and watched as the muppet tilted his head questioningly. 

“It’s chamomile and lavender. It’s supposed to help you sleep. But it’s also just nice.” he answered softly. Heart sniffed the liquid before licking up a few drops, watching again as Roman took a sip of his own tea. “My mom used to do this when me and Remus were kids.” he said, spoken more into the distance than actually directed to Heart, but the muppet knew what he meant. Probably…

“She called it the Midnight Sad. You needed something warm and to have some good company with you to drive them away. So she made something warm; usually tea, although every once in a while we got hot chocolate. And we just kind of sat together.” he looked down at Heart, who was now watching him much more intently. He smiled and ran his fingertips over the creature again; this time, when he nudged his face into Roman’s hand, there were no hiccups. 

“It’s a lot easier to be sad when you're alone, isn’t it?” he asked, and Heart made a low, almost grumbly chirr, seeming to sniffle a little. The little creature took another taste of his own tea, but his eyes watched Roman over the dish as much as possible. 

“It’s ok,” Roman whispered, “we’ll be ok.” Heart offered him a trill at that, and Roman decided to just watch him for a while. He set his tea aside once again, and set his chin on his arms. 

He hadn’t realized he’d begun to drift off until something soft nosed at his jaw, and he tilted a little to the side to see Heart nuzzling his tiny face into Roman’s cheek, purring lowly. Roman couldn’t help it, he broke into a greater smile than before. When the little guy moved back, at the gardener’s own movement, he just smiled, offering a soft, “Thanks” to the creature.

In the morning, his back would hurt like actual hell from sleeping seated on the floor and leaning on the coffee table. Remus, coming to try and convince his twin to go to some weird art exhibition his friend was putting on, would take at least three up close pictures of Roman drooling on said table, which would act as blackmail for weeks. The other muppets, especially Stormy, would kick up a very noisy fuss that their fourth wasn’t tucked safely in their den. (And then, Stormy would kick up even more of a fuss that Heart had gotten tea and he hadn’t, and Roman would find him swimming in the human-sized cup of now very cold tea with his little butt up in the air like a fluffy purple heathen!) 

But that could all be handled later. They would both be fine.

-----

This has a Part Two now! 

[redrobin-detective]

you really like tea, so i was wondering if you could spare some advice? i haven't really tried many teas bc the ones i have tried ended up being really bitter (or maybe i just made them wrong). are there teas that are more mellow?

I believe I've talked about that I started drinking tea because I liked the idea of drinking tea. It seemed cool. Making good tea is something that takes practice and attention. Lord knows I made many bad cups when I first started out.

As for teas, there's a wide variety. Greens and Blacks are probably the easiest to find and steep but will get bitter if you don't time them right. Pay attention to how much tea leaves you scoop in, how hot the water is and (most importantly) how long you let the leaves steep. Same goes for bagged tea. If it says 2-3 minutes, do not let it sit for 7 or that tea will be incredibly bitter. If you watch anything, watch the time, I still occasionally set timers for the more finicky teas.

But mellow teas? Probably white or herbal. Whites are incredibly light and mellow but!!! They are the most delicate of teas to steep and will get bitter if you leave them in more than 2 minutes. I've been making tea daily for years and I still occasionally will mess up white teas. I'd maybe hold off on those until you get a better handle of teas. Herbals are a great place to start though, many of them don't contain any tea leaves and are just herbs and berries. Herbals are steeped to preference, I've let some of mine steep for 10+ minutes to fully extract the flavor. Herbal teas are usually the easiest for beginners but they can be sweet and tart.

Maybe for recommendations for mellow starting teas are some of my favorites. Jasmine is delectable, it will get bitter if you oversteep but you have some wiggle room. Just try and steep in that 2-3 minutes sweet spot and you're good. Lavender and rose are also choices, lav will get very lavandery very quickly but rose does ok if you go over a bit. Chamomile is also a good calm tea, it's messy to clean out of your strainer but it's a caffeine free herbal and thus can be steeped as long as you want.

Hope that helps.

[dksw0rld]

Question - how do you take care of yourself when you have your period? I have absolutely devastating cramps the first 2 days and have always tried my best to power through it. I'm trying to slow down and live my life differently, but I still feel immense guilt about basically grinding to a halt every month.

Hi Anon,

Dealing with painful period cramps is difficult and I'm sorry you have to go through that! Outside of consulting with a doctor about any medicines you can take to minimize the pain, I do have some tips on how to #1 take care of yourself during your period and #2 how to not feel guilty about taking time for yourself!

I will address #1 first:

I have cramps for the first day of my period as well, although they are not as painful as what you're describing but nonetheless try these out and see if they help!

- I try to move my body. I try to do light exercises at the gym or I'll go for a walk. I know for you it may not be possible to go out to the gym or on a walk during the first 2 days of your period but even getting up and doing some light stretching or yoga could help alleviate some of the pain.

- I have an orgasm or orgasms. I know this is somewhat of a taboo topic and not a common piece of advice for period pain but orgasming can help with period cramps! Look it up if you need more convincing! :)

- I take birth control which helps reduce cramps - the main reason I went on birth control was because they help with period cramps (I was younger than I am now but I had pretty bad cramps) but this is DEFINITELY something you need to talk to your doctor about before starting any form of birth control!

- I take Vitamins like B1 and fish oil and I drink ginger in some form - tea or just in my water almost daily. Those vitamins and ginger help with period cramps.

-Rubbing lavender, peppermint, rose or fennel essential oil on your uterus area is also helpful. It really is the aromatherapy of the oils that helps alleviate the pain but massaging the area also helps!

-Starting to drink two cups a day of chamomile tea a week before your period is also a good thing to start doing. Chamomile tea increases urinary levels of glycine which acts as a nerve relaxant (it helps relieve muscle spasms).

-Lastly, taking cinnamon capsules helps. Cinnamon helps reduce bleeding, pain and nausea which is definitely helpful for periods!

Now that I've laid out some tips on how to help reduce the cramping, let's move onto #2, not feeling guilty about taking time for yourself:

Think of yourself as a plant. Plants need care, sunlight, water and nutrients to grow. If they don't, they wilt and stop growing. You need the same things in order to thrive. Nobody can pour from an empty cup for long. Taking the time to prioritize your mental and physical health ensures you are the best you you can be, for yourself and for your loved ones. Like I said in my previous post, you give your all to work or school or your kids - whatever your situation is, day in and day out. Although you never need an excuse or inherent reason for self care and mental health days, reminding yourself that you earned some time off can be helpful. You only have one body and one mind, nurturing them AKA yourself is extremely important and necessary for your health mentally and physically. We take everything around us seriously - work, school, our family, our friends, etc., the least we can do for ourselves is take us and our health seriously!

I truly hope this helped. Thank you for trusting me enough to reach out for advice. I'm sending all the good vibes your way!

Much love,

DK

[sinner-as-saint]

‘Till We Bleed Out - 3.

Vampire!bucky x reader AU

Part 3 of this series. 

Run-through: Your car breaks down on a deserted road on a rainy night. You have no other option but to seek shelter from the nearest house you could find; the mansion, which happened to be the talk of the town for its mysteriousness along with its equally mysterious owner, Mr. Barnes. The universe can be tricky sometimes but the fact that you found yourself at that mansion’s doorstep at that time was no simple coincidence. That one night changes everything forever - quite literally. True love, past lives and creatures from folklore; turns out it’s all real. 

Themes throughout the series: vampire!bucky, fluff, smut, angst 

“Calm down, sweetheart.” 

He must’ve noticed you were on the verge of losing your mind. How could you not? You had so many questions. So many things you couldn’t wrap your brain around. What was the meaning of all this? 

“What is this?” you pointed at the painting; scared, nervous and baffled. 

Bucky walked further in, careful as to not make any sudden movement which would make you even more of a nervous wreck than you already were. “I’ll tell you everything, doll. Just calm down, alright. There’s nothing to be scared of. I’m right here with you.” 

You looked up at him in surprise. “Nothing to be scared of? There’s a painting of me and you dating back to 1872. That was almost a hundred and fifty years ago. But I met you just two days ago. None of this makes sense, none of it adds up. And that doesn’t bother you?” you sounded more sad and confused than scared. This isn’t normal. None of this is. “Who are you?” 

Despite knowing that someone else in your shoes would be screaming bloody murder and running for their lives by now, you stayed put. Despite the confusion, you felt protected. Something inside you knew no harm would come to you while Bucky’s around. But the rational side of you couldn’t afford listening to that side of you right now. Right now your brain needed concrete answers, not reassurance. 

“No. It doesn’t bother me.” He walked over and held you gently by the shoulders. “And if you let me explain, it won’t bother you either.” One look into his eyes and you felt yourself calming down already. 

“Make this make sense.” 

After he got you to sit down, in that very room, he began explaining. 

“I’m not exactly human, Y/N.” His first few words earned him a nod from you. 

“I figured that out a few minutes ago.” 

He continued. “And neither were you, in your previous lifetime.” That sentence shocked you. You didn’t know what was more surprising, learning that there was indeed a lifetime before this one or the fact that in the previous one, you and Bucky knew each other. “We were both vampires.” 

“Oh my God…” 

He paused for a while, trying to be as slow and as careful as he could be with his words. “We were married, you and I. And we were happy.” He said so and waited for your reaction. 

Your eyes watered and he noticed. “I’m… I was your wife?” you asked and he nodded. You thought back on all the things he told you about his wife; those were all about you. Your heart felt like it was being torn in two. “And I died.” he nodded again. “How did I die?” 

He took a deep breath and lowered his eyes to the dark carpet beneath his feet, that memory was always the hardest to revisit. “Our families were not exactly… friendly. Yours hated mine, and vice versa so our marriage was not something they could bear.” He let out a dry chuckle. He continued, a strange fire in his eyes; burning hot hatred. “They kept trying to break us apart,” he smiled, sadly, “but we were strong. Together.” He looked back up at you. “Until one day…” 

He stopped talking. He ran his fingers through his hair, he was hurting. You felt the intense need to just get up from the couch you were sat on, and walk over to where he sat and just comfort him. Maybe hug him and tell him it’s all okay now. But you remained seated, you couldn’t move. 

“Bucky… I need to know.” You figured it was a delicate subject but you needed to piece it all together. You were a mess at the moment. 

“We were returning home and we were attacked. By hunters.” 

You sat up straighter. “Hunters?” 

“Vampire hunters. Two different parties. Each anonymously hired and sent by our own families, ordered to have each of us killed. But you know, back then hunters had rivalry against each other as well. And ironically, the groups of hunters our family hired were not exactly seeing eye to eye with each other.” He let out another dry chuckle. “Upon reaching our home, they all forgot their initial purpose for a moment and began butchering one another instead, in the name of looming enmity. And you and I got caught in the crossfire. ” 

He paused. If it were physically possible he would’ve shivered at the memory; so tragically vivid in his mind. You waited for him to continue. “But some of them also remembered that they had been ordered to kill us both, so our front yard quickly became a battlefield.” He sounded bitter, angry. “We fought them off for a while but we were terribly outnumbered. I was wounded, so were you, and I tried to reach you but…” he trailed off, took a deep breath and continued, “they got to you first.” 

You tried to find the right thing to say but got nothing. Bucky spoke up again. “I was helpless. I couldn’t move. I had to watch as they… took you away from me.” He finally looked up at you and you were in shock. “Those sent by your family, what was left of them after the massacre at least, fled. Those sent by mine finished their job.” The look of hurt on his face was unbearable. “And I begged them. I begged them to kill me too but they just left me there.” 

You felt a weight on your chest. That was brutal. 

“You died at our doorstep.” He still remembered the last few moments he held you before you left… 

-

He somehow managed to get up and stumbled on his way to you, bullets and sharp stakes pierced all over his body as well as yours. You weren’t gonna make it, and he knew but he still begged you to stay. 

“You can’t leave me. You promised.” He cried, cradling your head on his lap. “Don’t leave me.” 

He watched how you used the little bit of energy left to choke out a few words. “I’ll find you again. Someday. I promise…” your body was getting heavier and heavier. Bucky felt like he was dying too. “I love you, Buck.” 

And with that, you closed your eyes forever. He sat there, your lifeless body in his arms and he screamed and yelled and cursed the universe. He was wounded, he would be healed by dawn. But you wouldn’t. He survived the attack that day, but part of him died along with you too. 

-

You cleared your throat. “How do you… how did you know it’s me? How can you be sure? What if I just look like her?” you looked up at the painting and he did too. 

He gave you a soft smile. “Chamomile and lavender tea is your favorite. You like red roses. You have a fear of deep water but you love the beach. You have this weird obsession with snakes. You love red wine. You could practically live in a library. Thunderstorms comfort you. You get a lot of déjà-vu, more than anyone you know. Also, you surely have a birthmark on your back, below your left shoulder. It perhaps hurts sometimes and you don’t know why, because regular birthmarks don’t hurt.” 

Your eyes widened more and more as he spoke, but you gasped when he mentioned the birthmark. “How do you know that?” Very few people knew of your rather strange birthmark which tingled, burned and hurt sometimes. 

“You were staked through the heart from the back. It left a mark on you.” He answered. “Forever.” 

You closed your eyes and took a deep breath, trying to soak all this new information in. This was a lot to take in. 

You cleared your throat again. “I was a vampire.” You stated. Bucky nodded. “I married you.” He nodded again. “I can’t- how do I-,” 

“Hey, it’s a lot to take in. Take your time. Go to bed if you wish to.” His voice sounded so soft. 

Oh you couldn’t sleep, not with all this. You shook your head no, you had questions. “How long were we married for?” 

“Almost a century.” His answer made your jaw drop. 

“How old are you?” 

He chuckled. “250. Give or take a few years.” 

“Oh my God,” you sighed, genuinely surprised. You thought back on all that he said earlier, about your families, and asked, “You said our families were against our relationship.” He nodded. “Well, where are they now?” 

“Gone.” 

“What do you mean, gone?” 

He sighed and ran his fingers through his hair again. “After you left, I was unhinged. My memories of the couple of decades after your death is a little blurry. Apparently I went seeking revenge. But our friends found me and brought me back to sanity before I was gone completely and they told me that I had destroyed each and every last member of both our families.” 

“You killed them.” It wasn’t a question. 

“They deserved it. They took you away from me.” He sounded so broken, and hurt that you could feel your heart burn inside your ribcage. 

“When you say ‘our friends’ you mean…” you trailed off not knowing how to put it. 

He nodded. “Other vampires, yes. Most of them at least.” 

“This is so crazy.” You mumbled, looking down at your lap. This was too much to handle all at once. Bucky got up from his seat and walked cautiously over to you. 

He sat down on the edge of the wooden coffee table right in front of you and held his hand out. You placed your hand in his without a second thought. “You always had faith in the universe you know. You used to tell me that one single lifetime isn’t going to be enough for all the love that you and I have for each other. You used to always tell me that you’ll find me in the next one as well. And you did. You kept your promise. You’re home now, to me.” 

You felt a tear slide down your cheek. Those words sounded so familiar. Bucky reached out and wiped the tear away. “I… I don’t remember. I mean, I’ve lived a whole life not knowing you were until just a few days ago and now… all this?” 

He brought your hand up to his lips and kissed your knuckles softly. “It’s almost dawn. You haven’t slept well. Get some rest, we’ll figure it out. We always did.” 

You couldn’t argue. You needed to not think for a while, so you just nodded and got up. He didn’t follow you as you made your way to the bedroom and threw yourself down on the bed. You closed your eyes and slipped into a dreamless sleep. 

The next day, you spent most of your morning in the room; unable to leave the bed. Each time you thought back on all that was revealed to you last night, your head hurt. Wanda was kind enough to come in and leave you your meals. She didn’t say a word, just polite smiles. Bucky came by as well, each hour or so to check up on you. You weren’t ready to talk yet. He understood. 

You spent the rest of the day looking out of the window, into the vast backyard. The weather was still gloomy, much like your mood. 

After dinner, Bucky came by again. With tea this time. You gladly accepted the cup, remembering how it helped you sleep better the other night. Bucky was about to walk out but you stopped him. 

“Stay. Please.” You said, your voice a little strained because you had cried earlier, unable to understand the wave of emotion which washed over you. He rushed to sit next to you, on the edge of the bed. “I’ve been having dreams.” you confessed. 

“What kind of dreams?” 

“About you. About us, together. About ballrooms I’ve never been in, about people I haven’t met. And this house, ever since I got here it feels like I’ve... “ you trailed off, unable to find the right words. Or maybe the words were too crazy for you to utter them out loud. 

He finished your sentence. “Like you’ve lived here before?” 

“Yes.” You nodded. 

He smiled. “It’s because you have. This is your home, our home. Those aren’t dreams, they’re your memories.” 

Another tear fell down your cheek. Well, that made sense now. That would explain why your ‘dreams’ were so detailed. 

Bucky stayed and talked to you until you felt sleepy. He kissed you on the forehead, whispering a ‘goodnight’ once you got under the covers and was about to walk out of the room but you stopped him, yet again. 

“There’s something else.” you said. 

He stopped right at the door and turned around to face you, “Yes?” 

“The day I got here, when you opened the door, I…” you reminded yourself that he deserves to know, “I felt this pressing need to tell you that I finally found you. I didn’t understand what that meant then.” 

For the first time in a long time, Bucky genuinely smiled. And it was breathtaking. His smile was gorgeous, contagious. “Goodnight, sweetheart. I’ll see you in the morning.” He left. 

You fell asleep rather quickly. And dreamt, again...

Kisses under a grand chandelier. Blue eyes, laughter and wine. Pure bliss. 

“We should get going, sweetheart. It’s late.” Bucky whispered, holding you close. “And I can’t share you any longer. I need you all to myself now.” He kissed along your jaw, making you giggle. 

Home. At last. Only just as you got down from the carriage, you realized something was wrong. Pain, pain everywhere. 

Bullets, stakes, sticks, stones - everything hurt. You heard someone screaming as you were being dragged away from Bucky. It was you. You begged for mercy, but you didn’t receive any. Then suddenly, a spot on your back burned. It hurt more than anything you’ve ever experienced. You realized you were being staked through the heart, and it was too late. You couldn’t fight back. 

The pain, although excruciating, was replaced by fear. Fear of having to leave Bucky behind. Bucky… where was he? 

Your vision got blurry, you fell to the ground. You tried to call out for him but no sound came out of your mouth. You were fading away. But then you saw a pair of dark eyes which slowly turned blue and teary. 

“Don’t leave me…” 

“I’ll find you, I promise.” All the years you spent with him flashed in front of your eyes. Your wedding, and the decades of pure happiness which followed. “I’ll find you…” 

You woke up gasping again, covered in goosebumps. You had a terrible headache as it all came to you at once; memories of a forgotten lifetime. You struggled to breathe; it felt like being hit by a violent wave and being pushed deeper beneath the surface. Your birthmark burned hot. And your lungs felt like they were on fire. 

You sat there in bed, breathing hard and fast as you remembered everything. You realized you had tears streaming down your face. It was all too much, but you kept searching for more. And the more you looked the more you found. You felt like you were about to pass out. 

1802, when you first met Bucky. Married in 1808. You died about 90 years after that. You remembered. You remembered it all now. Your cruel family, and his. The bloodshed of that night. And how you died at the doorstep of this mansion. This mansion… your home. You knew this place like the back of your hand. This is your home. 

You’re home. 

You called out, not too loud, knowing he would hear you still. “Bucky!” you held back sob. How did you survive all these years? Without him? 

“Bucky!” you called out again, crying out loud this time. You heard his footsteps running down the hall. And your heart raced. 

You had been so close to your home this whole time, so close to Bucky, in the same town. You just didn’t know.

[oddaodd]

· MASTERLIST ·

THOMAS SHELBY

· Fast Enough · In which the reader is there for Tommy during one of his mental breakdowns. (Angst)

· Awfully sensitive · In which Tommy comforts an emotional reader. (Fluff) 

· Her Eyes · In which Tommy and the reader are in an arranged marriage. (Fluff/Angst) 

· Hesitation · In which Tommy´s reaction to the reader´s pregnancy isn't what she expected. (Angst)

· Wishful Sinful Wicked Blue · In which the reader and Tommy love drinking together. (Smut/Fluff) 

· Concern In Painting · In which Tommy snaps at the reader´s concern about his wellbeing. (Angst/Fluff)

· Tender Sunken Sea · In which the reader convinces Tommy to go to the beach with her. (Fluff)·

· Not Quite It Seems · What You Want (part two) ·In which things turn sour when feelings get involved between Tommy and the reader. (Smut/Angst)

· In The Depths Of Despair · In which the reader refuses to let Tommy go into the tunnels alone. (Angst)

· All The Knives That Lacerate Your Brain · In which the reader deals with the aftermath of Tommy´s PTSD. (Angst)

· Stormborn · *Requested *  In which Tommy helps the reader give birth. (Fluff) 

· Body And Soul · In which the reader convinces Tommy to paint. (Fluff/Angst) 

· Relax · In which tommy helps the reader relax. (Smut) 

· A Second,Or Two, Or Three · in which the reader tells Tommy she loves him for the fist time. (Fluff)

· I Will Be Your Wine · A Lace Ghost · (Part two)  *Requested* In which the reader realizes she and Tommy were never meant to be. (Angst) 

· Dancing Out In Space · In which the reader has an anxiety attack and Tommy is there for her. ( Fluff/Angst) 

· The Wait · *Requested* In which Tommy deals with the reader’s mood swings during pregnancy. (Fluff) 

·A Mundane Occurrence Heavy With Significance · *requested* In which Tommy spends the night at the reader’s place for the first time and his nightmares pay an unwanted visit. (Fluff) 

· Pretty Empowering I Must Say · *Requested* In which John and Arthur tease Tommy for being soft in the reader’s presence. (Fluff). 

· Dedicated To Touch · *Requested* In which the reader makes a touch starved Tommy feel loved. (Fluff)

· What No One Would Ever Know · *Requested* In which Tommy’s wife is badass and he is soft only for her. (Fluff).

· Besides Tea And Toast · * Requested* In which the reader is a war widow with a daughter and Tommy proposes to her. (Fluff) 

· The Flames Singing · *Requested* In which Tommy is vulnerable and Y/n comforts him. (Fluff) 

· Cold Tea And Romantic Gestures · In which Tommy makes the reader feel loved. (Fluff)

· Mementos Of The Sea · *Requested* In which the reader takes tommy away to the sea for their wedding anniversary. (Fluff) 

· Lydia Pinkham’s Remedies · *Requested* In which Tommy comforts the reader while she suffers from period cramps. (Fluff) 

· The Emerald’s Life Long Wait · *Requested* In which Tommy feels the reader deserves better than him. (Fluff/Angst).

· One Of These Days These Heels Are Gonna Stomp All Over You · *Requested* In which the reader is harassed by her boss and tells Tommy. (Angst) 

· Winter Son · *Requested* In which Y/n and tommy rejoice over their baby son’s first Christmas. (Fluff). 

· For Ages · In which Y/n falls for Tommy, her lifelong friend. (Angst/Fluff)

· What’s Going On? · *Requested* In which y/n isn't sure who her baby’s father is, Tommy or John. (Drama) 

· I Was Listening · In which Tommy makes the reader feel less insecure. (Fluff)

· Dangerous, The Horse · In which Tommy doesn't want to open up to the reader. (Angst/Fluff)  

· Broken Bones · *Requested* In which Tommy’s wife breaks her leg and he takes care of her. (Fluff)

· Light My Fire · *Requested* In which the reader, Charlie’s nanny, gets pregnant with Tommy’s baby. (Smut/Fluff/Angst) 

· Unwanted Surprises · In which the reader wonders if she and tommy have fallen out of love (Angst). 

· Can You Feel How Fast That’s Going?· *Requested* In which tommy needs to sort out his priorities and confesses his love to the reader. Based on the The Weekend’s song Where You belong. (Angst/Fluff/Smut)

· Just Till Noon · *Requested* In which the reader convinces Tommy to stay in bed a bit longer. (Fluff) 

· Whisky Floors · *Requested* In which Tommy disappears for two days and comes home to his annoyed pregnant wife. (Angst/Fluff)

· Birthday Pearls · The reader wants Tommy to spend her birthday with her, but he’s busy. (Angst/Fluff).

· Maimed · *Requested* In which Tommy finds out the reader had to resort to prostitution when he was away at war and doesn’t react well to it. (Angst)

· A Conjured Up Death Wish · *Requested* In which the reader begins to worry about how much damage Grace’s Ghost can cause (Angst) 

· Delightful Misty Dream · In which Tommy joins the reader in the bathtub after a rather stressful day. (Smut/Fluff) 

· A Whimsical Tale · *Requested* In which Tommy gets jealous of Finn flirting with his maid because he likes her. (Smut/Fluff). 

· Nice Things · In which Charlie snaps at the reader and Tommy feels guilty. (Angst) 

· Ominous · *Requested* In which Y/n gets hurt stopping the Lees from raiding the betting shop and suffers from it. (Angst) 

· Heedless Words That Numb The Heart · *Requested* In which Tommy snaps at the reader and then makes it up through small acts of love. (Angst/Fluff) 

· A Concoction of Honey, Oatmeal and Herbs · In which Tommy agrees to do skincare with the reader. (Absolute Fluff) 

· A Dress Made Out Of Daffodils · In which the reader isn't ready to sleep with Tommy and he is understanding and loving about it. (Fluff)

· They Were Closer Now, Fernando · In which Tommy comes home exhausted from a bussiness trip in London and snaps at the reader. (Angst/Fluff)

· Cloudberry Flavored Midnight Cravings · *Requested* In which the reader is craving some biscuits late at night and Tommy being the loving husband he is scours Birmingham to satisfy his wife’s craving. (Fluff) 

· Soft Words Professed Amidst Uncertainty · *Requested* In which the reader is shocked by tommy’s newfound compliments towards her. (Smut/Fluff) 

· Fake It Till You Make It · *Requested * In which Tommy pretends to be Y/n’s boyfriend in front of her brothers. (Fluff) 

· Gardens That Like To Run with Blushing Flowers · *Requested* In which the reader leaves a flower on tommy’s desk every morning and one day he confronts her about it. (Fluff) 

· Slumberless Hours On A Gloomy Saturday · In which Tommy tries to make Y/n feel better after Charlie tells him she has been feeling down. (Fluff/Angst)

· The Devil’s Hour · *Requested* In which Tommy comes home late at night to find the reader still awake waiting for him because she wants to cuddle. (Fluff) 

· Bishops And Pawns On The Storm · *Requested* In which the reader teaches Tommy to play chess (Fluff) 

·Idyllic Announcements In The Wake of Epsom · *Requested* In which the reader has something very important to tell Tommy after the races. (Angst/Fluff)

· I Don't Go In For Sweets · *Requested* In which Tommy reluctantly agrees to marry the reader and is awfully cold and distant towards her. (Angst/Fluff).

·July's Official Birthday Flower · In which the reader suffers from yet another miscarriage and Tommy is there for her, but there's always going to be a reminder of what they've lost. (Angst)

·Wailing Teapots · In which Tommy begins questioning Y/n's allegiances and goes and pays her a visit to confront her about it only to find out a dark truth. (Angst/Fluff)

CILLIAN MURPHY 

· Slip Of The Tongue · In which after an embarrassing slip of the tongue while filming a scene with Cillian, the reader feels she ought to explain herself. (Fluff) 

ALFIE SOLOMONS 

· Home · *Requested* In which y/n Shelby falls for Alfie. (Fluff) 

· Cointreau · *Requested* In which Alfie is intrigued by his next door neighbor. (Fluff) 

· The Best Pies In England · *Requested* In which the reader finds out that Alfie isn't really a baker and gets sad that he cant bake. (Fluff) .

· Life In Margate · *Requested* In which the reader decides to move with Alfie to Margate when he tells her he has cancer. (Angst/Fluff).

MICHAEL GRAY

· A Lavender Bath · Chamomile Tea · *Requested* In which Michael receives a distressing phone call from the reader. (Angst) 

· Like A Queen In Days Of Old · *Requested* In which Michael offers his coat to the reader who is a jazz dancer. (Fluff) 

· What About France ? · *Requested* In which Michael tells the reader he must away to America (Smut/Angst)

ARTHUR SHELBY 

· Sounds Like A Dream · *Requested* In which Y/n makes Arthur feel better after one of his breakdowns. (Angst/Fluff) 

· A Lemon Tree Would Also Be Divine · *Requested* In which Arthur goes strawberry picking with the reader and then they bake a pie together. (Pure cottage core fuel/Fluff) 

· Someone Able To Put Your Fires Out · *Requested* In which Arthur relaxes as the reader reads to him (Fluff) 

JOHN SHELBY 

· Passing Clouds ·*Requested* In which the reader suffers from depression and John comforts her. (Angst/Fluff)JOHN SHELBY