#also i have like over ten of these left so I'm sorry of you're sick of them

[blackbirdie1234]

Hey!! I love your fic's so much!

Can I request a Jacob x Fem!reader where they are friends but reader has a crush on Jacob. When he shifts he leaves and does what he did to Bella like ignoring her and Billy won't answer the door.

Mutual pinning but neither knows. He imprints on reader.

Thank you so much keep up the great writing :)

Also, I was wondering if you are going to be doing the vampires as well?

Hi!, Thank you so much for the request! I appreciate the kind words <3

I will be doing fanfics for the vampires as well! As of right now I only have the wolves, but I am planning on making a master list for the vamps and Bella. If you want to make a request for them I can definitely do that! I am planning on making a fic for Jasper soon!

A/N: Not proofread! I aged Jacob up a bit, you both are seventeen here. I didn't know exactly how to end this but I think I might do a spin-off series off of this fic so if you are interested in that let me know. Also, sorry for the late posting I am currently sick and going through it lmao. Hope you enjoy <3

Warnings: Jacob being an ass, cursing, angst, Y/N with a backbone.

Wolf’s Out Of The Bag

Jacob Black x Fem!reader

You were staring blankly down at your phone. Ten phone calls, ten phone calls sent to voicemail. Ten desperate, pleading voicemails. No callback, no text, nothing received. You snapped your phone closed and threw it down on the bed.

It had been two weeks since Jacob stormed off from your house after getting into a small disagreement, at least it started off that way.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~"It's nothing you need to worry about, Jacob," You grumbled with a slight roll of your eyes. Hoping he would drop the subject.

He was giving you an irritated look. You lightly pushed him with your shoulder giving him a small smile.

"I didn't think you'd care that much, it was one date and it's never happening again," you noted with a light-hearted laugh to ease the tension.

He turned to face you, irritation turning to anger. You could actually feel the heat radiating off of his body next to yours.

"Wow you must be really dumb, I mean how could you even think about going on a date with that pig. He's not good enough for you, but then again if you were desperate enough to give him a chance maybe I'm wrong" He barked getting more bitter with each word.

You look at him in shock.

"Why would you say that to me" You said not believing what you were hearing. "It's really none of your business who I go out with, you aren't my bodyguard, you don't have to 'protect' me. When did you get the right to decide who is 'good enough' for me? Huh? You're being a dick and I don't know why but it better change right now." You say sternly. He has never acted like this before and this sudden behavior change is not sitting well with you.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Jacob left shortly after that. He had gotten so angry he was shaking, you can't even remember the words that were thrown after that. Now, he wasn't answering the phone. Billy said he came down with mono, you didn't know how much you believed it but decided to trust that Billy wouldn't lie to you.

Jacob was your best friend, you loved him a lot. You had never had such an intense fight, you never thought he would react the way he did. You only went on the stupid date to get Jacob out of your head, you thought that maybe you would get over Jacob if you found someone else to pay attention to. You were wrong, no one made you feel the way that Jacob did. Jacob made you feel at home, you couldn't explain why but it was like he was the person you were meant to be with. He was the one who understood you fully and would never judge you for anything you said or did. Until now......

You were deeply hurt by what Jacob said to you, and if he thought that you would get over it he was surely mistaken. He had never said anything more hurtful to you in your entire friendship. You had thought about just letting it go, letting life run its course even if it meant Jacob being out of your life, but you couldn't just sit and let him speak to you that way. You wanted answers. Sitting in your room waiting for him to call and explain was becoming too stressful. You sat there for hours overthinking and no matter what you were doing you were replaying the moment in your mind.

You must be going crazy. At least that's what you were trying to convince yourself after seeing Jacob cliff-jumping with Sam Uley and his gang. You had decided that you would go to La Push, and relax your body and mind on one of the only partly cloudy days in Forks. The skies were pretty clear but there was a storm coming soon, so you decided to do it now. Never in your life did you think you would see what you were seeing now. Are you fucking serious? was all you could think as you drove your car straight to Billy Black's house. You wanted to make sure it was really Jacob, so you went to the man who had told you how 'serious' his condition was in the first place.

As you pulled into the driveway the clouds began covering the sky in a dark grey mass. You hopped out of the car and began walking to the front door, Billy had opened the door as soon as you stepped onto the wood. His face had a mix of concern and confusion as he noticed your agitated expression and the way your chest was slightly heaving from anger.

"Where is he" you say with a grumble.

"He's not here, he went out," He says seriously but looking down a bit not wanting to make eye contact. Billy didn't like lying to you and to your face it was even worse.

Just as you were about to speak you looked to the side and saw that far away down the hill, Jacob stood playfully nudging another man as a few more came out of the woods.

"Don't Y/N" Billy said in warning.

You started stomping down the hill, ignoring Billy's yells. Billy calling your name caught the attention of Jacob, as his face shifted from laughing to completely still. You continued to walk towards Jacob as the rain started, it quickly went from a drizzle to full pouring as you finally reached him.

To say you were fuming would be an understatement.

"What the actual fuck Jacob!" you say basically screaming at the shirtless man, who was now staring directly into your eyes with what looked like pure amazement but you ignored it the best you could, whatever love for him you felt in that moment may have been strong but you were too angry to care so you continued.

"So we have one fight and you ignore me for two weeks?! I called you ten times, ten times Jacob. You couldn't bother picking up the phone at least once, you could've told me you didn't want to be friends but no! You had your daddy lie to me" You say with an angry laugh.

"I thought you were sick Jacob! Too sick to pick up the damn phone and text me! Come to find out you were just having too much fun cliff jumping with the guys we used to make fun of! You know what you can have them, If you want to throw away seventeen years of friendship then be my guest." You say finally taking a breath.

The weight off of your chest feels amazing, but as you finish Jacob falls to his knees. The boys behind him look between you two with pure shock on their faces before they start laughing and smiling. You look up at them shocked and confused thinking they were making fun of you. They start walking away but not before patting Jake on the back. Sam leans down and whispers something to him as he sits there still on his knees staring at you.

"Do you even care about a word I just said to you? You know what never mind if you think this is a joke I might as well leave," You say turning around and starting to walk away.

Jacob suddenly found his voice as he quickly got to his feet and stumbled trying to reach you.

"WAIT! Wait, wait, Y/N please hold on!" He spoke hurriedly. Grasping for your hand and pulling you around. Hand now resting on your waist.

"I am so, so sorry. Please let me explain everything, I promise I won't lie to you anymore. I can explain everything now, just come inside and dry off." He said pleadingly, trying his best to get you to listen to him.

You thought for a moment, you didn't trust him at all but the way he was speaking you knew he was telling the truth to some extent. It was hard for him to lie to you, you know how Jacob works, you know the subtle mannerisms he has when he's not telling the truth. Considering all of this you finally speak.

"Fine, but if things don't add up or I find out you are still lying, I am gone," You say sternly, pulling his hands away from you and walking up the hill.

When you get to the house, Jacob gives you warm tea and a blanket which you take from him without a word. He comes over and sits across from you. He almost reaches for your hand but stops himself.

"The day that I left your house, something changed, I changed...." He claimed, looking at your reaction with a hint of fear but continued "This is going to sound crazy, but you have to believe me on this..... I am a werewolf"

You stared at him for a moment before throwing the blanket off and standing up, Jacob followed suit immediately. You threw him a glare before starting to walk out.

"No, No, Y/N wait!" he shouted after you, reaching out and grabbing your hand. "I am telling the truth let me show you" He spoke as he continued outside your hand still in his.

" I swear Jacob if this is a pra....."

You went dead silent as he began taking his boots, and then his shorts off. Now standing in just his underwear. He gave you a curt nod and then started bending and shaking profusely. You could barely blink before your best friend stood in front of you only he wasn't human anymore, he was a massive wolf.

You jumped back a bit as the wolf started coming towards you, noticing your fear he slowly laid down on the ground and gave out a small whine to signal he would not hurt you. You were in complete shock, how was this possible? Everything you ever heard about the stories of the Quileute tribe growing up was true, and your best friend was living proof. A thousand thoughts ran through your mind, but they were silenced by the wolf standing up and trotting to the back of the house. Jacob then emerged in different clothes than before.

"I'm sorry, but I couldn't tell you Y/N" Jacob expressed, grabbing your hands hesitantly until you leaned into the touch slightly.

"Why couldn't you tell me, you know I would never judge you, nor would I ever tell anyone " You pressed before giving him a confused stare "Wait why are you telling me now?"

He looked at you a gave you a crooked smile.

"It's one of the rules that came with the gig" He laughs a bit before pulling you a bit closer. "The reason I can tell you now is because you are my soulmate," He says beaming down at you.

You stare up at him with a bewildered expression.

"I'm your what?" you say breathing out.

"You are my imprint, Y/N. It's a wolf's soulmate, it is the reason for their existence, you feel like it isn't gravity holding you to the ground anymore, it's them. You can be anything the imprint wants you to be, a friend, a protector, a lover, all that matters is that the two are connected. Like vines on trees overlapping each other both on the same path, interlocked." He pauses, putting his hand on your face and caressing your cheek gently.

"I know this might be overwhelming and a lot to handle. I really want you to know how deeply sorry I am for everything that I said. I'm not going to sit here and blame it all on the wolf because it wasn't, I was jealous. I was jealous that you went on that date with someone that wasn't me and I didn't mean a word that I said about you. I'm going to be fully honest with you from now on, starting with the fact that I have been in love with you since the second grade. I know that trusting me will take time, but I am willing to do whatever it takes to earn it back. I understand that I have hurt you, so it might take a very long time but I will always be there for you. Everything is up to you, I understand if you want to reject the connection. The connection can be anything you want it to be, but I really truly do not want to lose you and the past two weeks without you have been hell on earth for me. I'm just really sorry Y/N." He pleads letting go of your hands and allowing you to process.

"I... I love you too Jacob. I have for a while now. I'm not going to forgive you easily but I am glad you understand how much you have hurt me. I am willing to give this a shot, mainly because I can feel the connection and would be an idiot if I said that I didn't." You laugh a bit as he looks at you with the biggest smile on his face.

"But if you ever say or do that to me again I will put you in a dog house and leave you there," You say with an evil smile laughing at the way his face drops before he joins in.

You two get out of the rain and drive separately to Emily's house where you meet the pack and they explain in much more detail what being a wolf really entails. You and Emily become quick friends, and as the days go on you slowly fall into a routine that is pure chaos but you wouldn't have it any other way. You and Jacob work on your relationship, slowly building back trust and falling deeper and deeper into love with each other. You have fully accepted your place in a world filled with wolves and life seems to be going great, that is until they tell you exactly why they turn into the big ferocious beasts....... there are vampires in Forks.

[loveshotzz]

pretend i wrote this when you were sick - pretend it's also not this long. also sorry if it looks like there are parts missing.

He's on his third call while he waits at the door in the early spring breeze, unbottoned work shirt billowing with him -- silently chastising himself for not throwing on a sweater since you told him to do it before he left. He presses the bell again, hearing it go off in the house for the second time, anxiety brewing in his chest. He'd never seen you so sick, and even though the doctor said it was just a bad flu, seeing you in bed like this made his heart pound. He wasn't sleeping, had been working from home the past few days. He'd set up shop right outside the hall of the bedroom, ignoring his office so he could hear if you called out to him -- Bandit dutifully keeping watch over you at the end of the bed. It was something he wasn't expecting to affect him like this, his thoughts getting clouded with the sound of hospital monitors and oxygen machines.

You did your best to understand and assure him you're okay -- you're just kind of a baby about being sick. Lucky for Steve, he's been loving a chance to get to baby you - despite the ache it causes to see you like this.

But the babying would start even quicker if the front door of the house he was in front of would open.

"Honey, am I gonna have to file a report? You can't just be showing up to my house -- I got a wife at home," the tease comes from a familiar smoky voice, "Do you really want her to find out about us?"

"I called three times," Steve huffs, "I said I'd only be gone for ten minutes."

"Do you really think she's counting? She's probably asleep. Plus, you're a minute man," Eddie winks, beckoning him into the house, "And if she calls you can run right home, you're around the fuck--effing corner."

"Yeah, you're around the effing corner, Big Guy," Gwen's tiny voice repeats from the island in the kitchen.

"Gwendolyn," Eddie warns. "Sorry," she whispers back, "I won' say id again."

"Thank you, doll," he smiles, "Can you ask mommy to bring the soup and meds we packed up for your aunt so we can give it to Steve?" She patters away with her light up sneakers glinting pink and purple with every step, disappearing into the house only to run back winded a few minutes later. "Mommy said you have two hands that work just fine so you can get it," she smiles, not fully understanding what she means, "And then she said to say please after. Please!"

Steve snorts, "Yeah, loser, go grab my shi--stuff."

Eddie rolls his eyes, "Whatever."

As her father leaves, Gwen climbs back up on the bar stool and looks up at Steve curiously, "So when does she get to come back over?"

"When she feels better, angel," he smiles, "Why?"

She shrugs, "I dunno, I like when she comes over 'cause then it's not just you."

His mouth gapes with a smile, "What do you mean? Am I not enough for you?"

Gwen shrugs in the way four year olds shrug when they're feeling sneaky, "She's juss funner, Big Guy." "Do you hear this?!" Steve gasps as Eddie re-enters, "She doesn't think I'm as fun."

"You haven't been playing 'Cool Barbies' with her, lately," Eddie shrugs, popping the two tote bags filled with sick day amenities on the table, "Ow, ow Lu, don't pull daddy's hair, please." "It's okay Luce, you can do whatever you want," Steve coos to the baby on Eddie's hip, grabbing the bags and putting them over his shoulder. He leans forward to kiss her only for Eddie to step away.

"Dude, not with your potential flu germs -- they're picking up enough sh--stuff at daycare," Eddie says, taking the baby's pudgy hand and waving, "Say byyyyeee Big Guy." "Bah," Lucy gurgles in her post nap haze, head resting heavily on Eddie's shoulder. "Bye, Big Guy," Gwen smiles, hugging him at the knees, "Tell Auntie-I-said-hi-and-I-miss-her-and-love-her-and-that-she-is-so-pretty-and-that-I-have-new-Barbies."

"I will tell her, thank you for the message," Steve nods, chest hammering again at the thought of you sick and bed without him. He flicks his head up at Eddie, "Tell Peach I said hi."

"Yeah, I'll tell her somethin' alright," he half grumbles, hoisting Lucy higher up on his hip. Steve blows Gwen a kiss before making it back to you in the quick trip is takes to get back to your place. He knocks softly before stepping in, hearing your soft 'hm?' that sets his whole body a buzz with affection. "I have..." he starts, opening the bags, "Two quarts of Peach's famous 'sick soup', a shit ton of orange juice, 800mg motrin, a card from Gwen, a drawing from Gwen, three new pairs of fuzzy socks, a toy for Bandit? Okay..." He lists off the rest of the care package before looking at you with a smirk, "And absolutely nothing for me." "I can gib you someding," you murmur out with a stuffed nose, "I can gib you a kiss." "Ooh, how about I give you a kiss tough girl?" he asks, chestnut hair falling into his eyes as he leans down to kiss your forehead. His lips are warms against your clammy skin, enough to soothe you back into a cozy half sleep under the covers, "How're you feelin'?" "Dired," you admit, "Bud I could really use thad soup." "Okay," he nods, "I'll heat it up for you." He gets back to the door looking back with a soft gaze on you, thinking of Lucy's face and how it looks when you hold her on your hip, how you look when you play Barbies with Gwen. How it would look when there's a baby that's the perfect blend of the two of you bouncing on your lap, when there's a baby monitor in the bedroom, when you're both complaining about germs at daycare. He opens his mouth to say something, but closes it before going downstairs. Right now, babying you is just enough.

CAROL!!!! Stop 😩 I physically cannot handle this amount of yearning. What have you done to me?!? I’m still sick (it won’t go away) so this was still perfect. Of course he’s imagining getting me pregnant while taking care of me, ILL GIVE THAT OLD MAN ANYTHING HE WANTS!!

Also shout out to the number one couple here and that’s ocs!eddie and airwiy!steve. I love that the little glimpse we get of them living close to each other now and the little growth of the munson family 🥺

[iamwhoami]

Babysitting 101

Chicago Med

You and Connor babysit Owen so that Will and Natalie can still have their date night after the babysitter calls in sick.

Warnings: None

Requested = Yes

Y/L/N = Your Last Name

"Nice job back there Dr. Y/L/N," Connor smiled at you.

The two of you had just finished a relatively easy surgery and had returned to the ED to help with the backlog of patients. Between the icy roads and flu season, they could use all the help they could get in there.

"You weren't too shabby either Dr. Rhodes," You shot back and Connor smirked.

"Quit flirting over there lovebirds," Maggie called out, "Y/N you're needed in Treatment 2. Connor, we have an incoming five minutes out, you're going to Baghdad."

"I'll see you after shift then?" Connor quirked an eyebrow and you nodded.

"You bet."

~~~

The rest of your day flew by without any sight of your boyfriend. You were so busy, constantly rushing from one room to next in an attempt to catch up with the schedule.

By the end of your shift, you were absolutely exhausted and wanted nothing more than to open a bottle of wine and put on your favourite movie while snuggling Connor on the couch.

It was that thought that managed to keep you on your feet.

"I am ready to call it a night," You breathed out while you gathered your items, "I don't know if my feet could stand a moment longer."

"Well, they're going to need to find some juice if you want to get to your car," Maggie joked.

You laughed, "Not if I can convince Connor to carry me there."

"I don't think you'd have any trouble," Maggie said and shook her head, "That man is whipped for you..."

You both chuckled at that but you both also knew it was true. Connor would fly to the moon for you.

"Well, have a good night Y/N," Maggie said and left, leaving you to wait for Connor alone.

You quietly waited on the couch for Connor to finish up his last surgery of the day. Nurses and doctors bustled in and out of the lounge and you wished each and every one of them a good night. You were mostly just on your phone, not actively engaging in any other conversation when you overheard your friend Natalie speaking.

"Sorry Will," She was saying, "The nanny just texted. She can't stay later tonight, something with her sister came up."

"Don't worry about it," Will responded, "I'll cancel the reservation then."

You spoke before you could really think things through, "I can watch Owen!"

When your sudden outburst was met with confused silence, you flushed and fumbled with your words.

"I wasn't eavesdropping, I just overheard," You mumbled quickly, "But seriously if you guys need someone to watch Owen, Connor and I can totally do it."

"Connor won't mind?" Natalie asked and you shook your head.

You and Connor hadn't really talked about kids but this wasn't anything like that. All you had to do was look after a toddler for a few hours. How hard could that be?

"We don't have anything better to do tonight anyway," You told them, "In fact, I think it'll be really fun!"

Natalie chuckled at your enthusiasm, "Well I can assure you that it won't be dull."

"Exactly," You pointed your finger at her, "You and Will go on your date. Do. Not. Cancel. Connor and I will watch Owen."

Will and Natalie took a moment to look at each other as if they were contemplating your offer. Finally, Natalie turned back to face you and nodded.

"Thank you Y/N," Natalie said genuinely, "I owe you one."

You shook your head though, "Nah...you don't owe me anything. I'm just glad I can help."

It was decided that Natalie and Will would go and get ready for their date and that they would drop off Owen when you and Connor were back at your apartment. You figured that you should give Connor a heads up but he was still in surgery and you weren't going to disturb him because he was suddenly on babysitting duty afterwards.

He'd get over it.

About ten minutes later, a tired-looking Connor walked into the doctor's lounge and the deepest part of your gut felt bad that you had dragged him into babysitting Owen after a long shift. That guilt caused you to just stare at your boyfriend for a solid minute before he pointed it out.

"What did you do," Connor demanded teasingly as he turned to face you.

You quickly snapped out of your trance, "Nothing!"

"Uh-huh..." Connor raised an eyebrow, "I know that look Y/N."

You feigned offence, "I don't know what you're talking about."

Connor only continued to stare at you and after a while, you finally caved.

"Okay fine," You sighed. "You have to promise that you won't get mad."

Connor nodded, "Okay..."

"I..." You squeezed your eyes shut before opening them again. "I kind of volunteered us to babysit Owen while Nat and Will go on a date."

Silence.

“So…” You stared at Connor, “Thoughts?”

Connor raised an eyebrow, “You voluntarily agreed to look after a toddler…after working a 12 hour shift…”

“Correct.”

The two of you stood there, staring at each other, unmoving. After a hot second, Connor let out a slightly exasperated sigh and ran a hand through his hair.

“Alrighty then, I suppose we should get going then,” Connor gave you a small smile, “wouldn’t want to keep Nat and Will waiting now would we?”

~~~ Perhaps you had underestimated how exhausting looking after a toddler could be.

No, you definitely had.

Dinner had been tiring enough. Somehow more food had gotten on you and Connor than into Owen's stomach.

"You've got a little something there," Connor teased and wiped mashed potato off your eyebrows.

You laughed, "What? Are you sure it's not my new makeup?"

Game after game. Activity after activity. It just didn't end, and yet somehow, it was you and Connor that were tired out, not Owen.

"Y/N!" Owen's little voice gleefully called out. "Come play!"

You huffed but smiled big for the little boy before pushing yourself onto your feet.

Connor couldn't help but chuckle, "Are you having some regrets right about now?"

"Pfttt, never," You shook your head as you sat yourself down on the ground next to Owen. "Right buddy? We're having a blast?"

Connor smiled at you affectionately. He couldn't deny that he was tired but he also had zero regrets. You were so good with Owen. The way you spoke to him. The way you naturally were so attuned to his needs. The way you understood his toddler language.

It took about another hour before Owen's energy began to wane. After a ten minute chase around the apartment, you had managed to wrangle Owen into his pajamas and Connor convinced him to brush his teeth.

Another twenty minutes later and Owen was passed out in bed and you and Connor collapsed on the couch.

"I'm not sure which was more exhausting," Connor joked. "Our twelve hour shift or this."

You teased, "Did a toddler outdo you?"

"Absolutely," Connor shook his head. "I was absolutely outdone by a toddler."

Laughing, you leaned against Connor who wrapped his arm around your shoulders and pulled you closer to his chest.

"You're really good with him you know," Connor softly said.

You hummed, "You weren't so bad yourself."

"Maybe we should babysit more often," Connor added and you scoffed.

"I think we need a few weeks to recover before making any big decisions."

[billys-pretty-babe]

I'm sorry to bother you but do you take requests for lil insecure anon here? You're You're amazing writer btw...

If you can and would like to, can you pls write something about Billy being hella sick, can be after or before the events at star course, and for once someone is taking care of him, aka someone being his girlfriend that is also his best friend (sorry I just live for the hcs that billy would date his best friend).

If you don't feel comfortable is fine really! I hope you're having a good day

Hi baby, I take requests from anyone and everyone! Don't ever be afraid to request something from me (it may take a few days depending on how my week is going). I'm so sorry that this is almost a week late.

Let Me

Pairing : Billy Hargrove x Fem!Reader

Summary : ^^^

Warnings : Vomit and swearing

Word count : ~ 1.02k

A/N : Requests are open

His entire body shook as he coughed. It had been almost a month since Starcourt and Billy's immune system was still weak. He groaned, his throat sore, his nose runny and his head was pounding. "Baby," he called out as best as he could, he knew you were somewhere in the house but he wasn't sure where.

The bedroom door pushed open as you held a cup of water and placed it beside him before pushing his sweaty hair back as you felt his forehead. "Baby, you're burning up. You wanna take a bath or shower?" He shook his head and you helped him take the blanket off considering he was shivering and complaining that he was cold not even ten minutes ago.

"Here, drink some water." He nodded and groaned, his body was aching, everything just hurt and he wanted to cry from the pain but he knew if he could face death at eighteen, he'd be fine with whatever sickness he was dealing with at the moment. You helped him sit up as he drank the cold water, letting his eyes flutter shut as the water helped soothe his throat momentarily before he put the glass down.

"Want something to eat?" He shook his head because he knew he wouldn't be able to stomach it, hell, the water made him feel nauseous. "You'll have to eat soon, B." He nodded and laid back down, spreading out as you wiped his sweaty skin with a wash rag. You gently rubbed his cheek, feeling bad for him. "I'll be back to check on you, take a nap, okay?" He nodded and you left the room and he fell asleep.

30 minutes passed and you decided to check on Billy. You walked into his bedroom to see his head in his trash can, his body lurching forward. You hated vomit, always ran when someone would merely gag but this was Billy, the same boy who risked his life to save teenagers a month ago.

You walked over and moved his hair back from his face as you gently rubbed his back. He finished emptying everything in his stomach before you took the bag from the trash can and quickly ran it outside before putting a new one in the black trash can and you grabbed a rag and dampened it with cold water. You hummed as you walked back to him, cleaning his face and wiping the tears under his eyes.

"I fucking hurt," he said, his voice straining. "Want some Tylenol? It might make your fever go down too." He nodded and you searched his cabinet before finding a bottle of Tylenol and you gave him two pills and handed him his water as he swallowed them. He groaned, his head on his headboard as he looked up.

He reached for you, he just wanted to be comforted but he wouldn't allow you to sleep beside him or kiss him because he didn't know what he had and he couldn't bare to see you in the same position he was. You moved closer to him as he held your waist. "Come on, let's get you a bath." He nodded and you helped him to his bathroom as he sat on the toilet lid as you prepped the bath for him. "Make it cold, please." You looked back, your eyes sad for him.

"Billy, it can't be cold, baby. It'll make you shiver and make your fever worse." He nodded and you tested the temperature of the water, making sure it was warm but not too hot or too cold and you helped him strip before putting him in the tub. He sighed and relaxed, shutting his eyes. You wet his hair and washed it for him, knowing the sweaty strands were aggravating him.

He twisted so his arms were on the side of the tub as he groaned and coughed as you rubbed his back. His coughing fit stopped and he put his head on the side of the tub as you gently rubbed his cheek as you talked to him softly, trying to provide comfort for him as you washed his sweaty skin.

"Let me get your clothes, okay?" He nodded and you left the bathroom and found him a pair of sweatpants. "B, do you have any boxers?" "Hamper," he called out as best as he could. You found the hamper with his clean clothes that you had washed two days before and found a pair before going into the bathroom. You grabbed a towel and helped him out of the tub as you handed him the towel and he dried himself off as you unplugged the drain of the tub.

You plugged in his hair dryer and he cringed before you turned it on. "I know baby but I'm gonna try and make it quick. You can't have wet hair or you'll feel worse." He nodded and slid his boxers and sweatpants on. You grabbed the damp towel and slid it under his hair. "Put the towel over your ears so it'll muffle the sound." He nodded and covered his ears with the towel and his hands as you put the dryer on hot and on the lowest setting so the motor wasn't as loud as you quickly dried his curly hair, using the end of the towel to aid you with the excess water.

You finished his hair and dried off his torso and despite being sick he smirked at you in the mirror. "No, you're sick. Go lay back down." He huffed and walked back to his bed and he laid down and covered up. "I'm cold again." You nodded and put the blankets on him as you sat beside him, moving his hair back. "Want me to lay with you?" He shook his head, "Don't want you to get sick." You nodded, "Okay." His hand found yours, his skin scorching hot as he intertwined his fingers with yours, making you smile.

You continued playing with his hair until he fell asleep. You leaned down and kissed his forehead, "I love you," you softly said, your lips brushing against his clean skin.

[inklore]

— CELEBRATING TWO YEARS OF LOVE.

let's pretend that i posted this on the real anniversary date (july 18th) and not a few weeks late ok. but i'm still shell shocked i honestly stayed around on here for this long, seeing as how i've been on this hellsite for over ten years maybe even longer, have left many blogs and sideblogs behind, but have stayed put on here for longer than it feels. even through all the craziness and friends gained and lost. i have not grown sick of this place and i know it's all because of my mutuals (and followers) aka the most beautiful, hilarious, talented souls anyone could ask to have on their side.

whether we are friends or have never spoken i love you, i adore you. thank you for making my time spent on here worth it even when times get tough and this little hobby of ours seems more like a stressful nine to five.

@deathmotif, @authurials, @theauthorvt, +annie — hey remember when we all met on wp and i started that silly little michael langdon gc on kik and it was a dozen of us in there but then it soon dwindled down to us five and kik was on the verge of imploding and we all moved over to snap and now we literally all talk every day, if not every other??! my day isn't complete without seeing one of you sending an unhinged video in the gc. IT'S BEEN SIX YEARS with you guys in my life and you know me better than anyone. i can tell you my darkest secrets, traumas, thoughts, and there's no judgment. it's literally the most healthy friend group ever. i'm forcing ya'll to dress up as barbie's for my bachelorette party, like you're stuck with me. barbie is serious. just as serious as my love is for each and every one of you. when i think about my life and future you guys are always in it. idk if we should thank cody fern or the antichrist or both. but whoever brought us together in this life i hope they do it in the next because life without y'all would suck.

@psychedelic-ink — you should already know how much i love you, but let me remind you, let me go on for ever and tell you how special you are to me ok. when i was balling my eyes out on the phone/discord you were there to listen to me be a blubbering mess, you were there to talk me down, to listen, to validate my feelings. when i need someone to be motivating and get shit done with me you're there. when i need to rant about something horny you're there to encourage the unhinged. our discord sleepovers are my favorite thing in the world. i'm still shocked when i think back to our casual messages on here turning into a friendship so close and tight that my man spent over $100 to send you a magazine (without question) because he knows how much you mean to me. you have my heart always!

@pedrito-friskito — i have the most vivid memory of me and sil talking about you on discord and how great you were and i was like um?? i wanna be friends with kay! so after we got off of the phone i messaged you and then before i knew it me, you, and sil were in a gc together and the rest is history. i love that you and i like to disappear without a word sometimes but always come back like lol sorry but here's this love and support and encouragement and let me just life update you but also make you horny with this thought, and sil just puts up with us and i love it. ily. i'm forever forcing you to write and publish every story you write because you're going to put sjm to shame with the beauty your brain comes up with.

@tom-whore-dleston — i know i'm the worst at replying but you never make me feel bad for it. you're like 'oh yeah her adhd brain will get back to this text in 2 to 3 business weeks it's ok', and i love you for it. but no seriously ily so much. you're the first person i think of when all i can think about is dick because i know you're thinking the same thing. i know you'll understand. every time i see you post on social media i'm like wtf?? why am i halfway across the states and not with the loml right now?? it's truly unfair because i know if we were together we'd be the most chaotic, loud, sluttiest duo ever. your talent always amazes me, your beauty makes me jealous. both of our partners better watch out because i'ma run away with you one day i swear!

@chaseadrian — the fact that we grew close in a fandom that i despise now and is more toxic than not and a beautiful friendship came out of it?? iconic. every time i think about you all i can think is 'they just seems like they have everything all together, their ideas, their graphics, their mind, the way they speak is like talking to that really cool english teacher' like lmao i cannot explain how much i want your vibe. i adore your vibe. i ADORE YOU.

@greenorangevioletgrass — as one of my first friends on this little blog of mine i feel like i need to do more than put into words how much i adore you, how grateful i am to call you a friend, to be a part of your presence on here. hearing your ideas, your living breathing fic-like life is serotonin to me. like please share in the sexy wealth bestie!

@sapphireplums — when i see you in my inbox i literally get this overjoyed feeling inside me like charity thought about me today?? took time out of her day to send me something?? i'm blessed. i hope you and your beautiful mind are thriving bestie because you're literally one of the nicest, softest, people i've met on here and i'm in your corner if you ever need me. to show you love and support. to continue to convince you that your themes will always be more superior than mine!!

@rae-gar-targaryen — if success and talent and beautiful prose (and face) was an olympic sport you would have won by now. you HAVE won. we may not talk as much as we used to but just know that i always am thinking about how you are, waiting patiently for you to bless us with more of your fics (even if it's a crumb i'm like a little mouse savoring it because hello?? emily henry who? she got nothing on you). as my lawyer i love knowing if i needed you you'd be there with a simple text, as my bestie, as someone i look up to, as someone who radiates elegance and something else i can't even put into words because that's literally how you leave me, speechless: never change and know i'm always here for you.

@allaboardthereadingrailroad, @littledemondani, @wroteclassicaly — the three of you were those 'big' accounts that always intimated me. i stood in the background reading your stuff and being like ok they're going to put me out of business and then being absolutely shook when you followed me, i felt like i made it. like this was what being on here was all about having the accounts you find the most talented and amazing, and who have wrote some of your fav fics, follow you. and we may not talk a lot but i cherish you guys so so very much. like even before i made this account, on my old accounts, i've always been your #1 fans!!

@kittyofalltrades, @namorwife, @yoditopascal — i may have all but died out and disappeared from the discord server, and we may not talk anymore, but some of my best memories are with you guys. the unhinged, the thirst, the games, the rantings, i've never been more entertained and chaotic and rowdy than i was with ya'll and i love it. i miss it. ya'll are still my favorite people, my loves, my besties. one day i will be horny over the same characters as ya'll again and you'll be annoyed with my thirst again.

@eupheme, @tripleyeeet, @wint3r-h3art, @ohcaptains, @celestianstars, @flordeamatista — if there were ever a group of beautiful people i constantly compare myself to because the way they write, the way their themes look, the way their fic layouts / set ups look, their graphics, their vibes, their talent, their so many damn things: it would be ya'll. like i'm constantly like how do i get on their level? like i know there's not levels on here and everyone is so uniquely special and amazing at what they write and do and make, but i'm always in the trenches of devoting and heart eyes over EVERYTHING ya'll post. ya'll are the cool art kids i want to hangout with but instead i'm screaming in cheer in the silent museum where your creations should be showcased.

@mothdruid, @moonlight-prose, @moondirti, @angrythingstarlight, @amywritesthings, @oncasette, @withahappyrefrain, @navybrat817, @bakerstreethound, @villenelle, @refined-by-fire, @ladylannisterxo, @emerald-chaos, @mxgyver, @foli-vora, @jettia, @moreofem, @bits-and-babs, @woodlandmouth, @fluffyprettykitty, @cocoamoonmalfoy, @galatially, @ladylannisterxo, @saintlike78, @buckys-estrella, @ghostlyfleur, @arctvrvs — through the two years of me being on here i have had the pleasure, the joy, of talking to each of you. whether that be screaming in asks, inboxs, discords, pms, where we were hyping each other up, sharing ideas, support, check ups, screaming over each others fics, whatever it may be. there has been love and support and every time i see ya'll in my notfis, reading my stuff, your thirst posts or rant posts or your rbs, i'm always grateful to see it. for it. to be a part of it. but most importantly i'm like: hello why are we not closer?? why do i not bombard them with my love?? annoy them with it so much so that they have no choice but to be my bestie and feel all the doormat love and support that i'm constantly feeling when i see their little icons and usernames. so this is me both saying i adore you, ily, we may not talk as much as i wished but i'm here supporting and loving everything you do and beware that i will annoy you with my love when you least expect it and soon you'll be wishing for me to get out of your pms. you have a friend in me, a supporter, a hyper, seriously i got lucky with y'all being my mutuals <3.

there's so many other babes that i'm missing but tumblr has a tag limit so i couldn't get everyone on this list but just know ily ily literally every single one of my mutuals is a gift from god to me. you put up with my posts and insanity, i have no choice but to give ya'll my whole ass heart!!!!

[my-castles-crumbling]

Greece anon here

Thank you for what you said about the eras tour rant I went on, it's really helped to calm some of my nerves.

Also good news! We didn't sell the tickets to strangers but to someone my mum works with and they will probably be able to grab the merch we want when they go to their show if we give them money for them so I probably won't have to worry about merch lines at all which is good. But if the lines are short when we go we might go anyway just to see what's left yk.

I have got the loop experience 2 earplugs because I saw a bunch of people recommending them but I'm really scared I'll be able to hear my voice really loudly in my head. I'll see when I get there whether the noise is bad enough to have to wear them.

It is almost only 10 days away and i am freaking out!!!! There is no way I am seeing Taylor swift in 10 days that's not real. She's literally my favourite person in the world and I'm going to see her in real life I am so EXCITED!!!!!!!!!

How did you organise your bracelets? I want to put the ones I get from other people on my wrists and keep the ones I've made separate but I just found out that wembley don't allow metal carabiners inside so I am trying to come up with a new way to hold them. My bag has a bunch of compartments (because I like to organise) so I might just have them loose in one of the big compartments lol

I'm going out with my friends on Wednesday (including the one I'm going to the eras tour with) and I'm going to be yapping about it so much they're going to be sick of me but I don't care because I'M GOING TO THE ERAS TOUR!!!!

I'm trying to get everything that I need to get done over summer break done before my show so after I can just lay and think "oh my god that was amazing I'm so sad it's over" but I tried to open the book I have to read yesterday and I just kind of stared at it for a while, not a lot of reading happened... But I opened it!!! And that counts as progress 😌

I'm so happy I'm actually going to the eras tour!

I got my tickets over a year ago (11th July 2023) and I have been waiting so patiently I can hardly control myself anymore. Like on the 16th August I am going to be AT THE ERAS TOUR!!!!! it's crazy I can't believe it. I watch a livestream of every single show (yes, every. Single. One. I know it's excessive but I just love it so much) and soon it will be MY show. I have seen it through over 100 grainy livestreams at like 2am and during classes and MY SHOW is so close I am so excited I could throw up, my stomach hurts if I think about it for too long.

This was long and it was mostly me rambling but once I get talking about it it's hard for me to stop so sorry but hey it could have been worse! How are you? I hope you're doing well, summer sucks sometimes cause of the heat but sometimes it's great, and I hope it's going great for you!

Hi!!! Ahhh, I'm so excited for you! You have to update me on how it goes, okay?

I organized my bracelets where I had my inappropriate ones on one arm and my g-rated ones on the other lol. Because I knew kids would be there. TBH my biggest regret of the show was that I didn't trade a lot though! I'm super socially awkward irl so I was scared to go up to people, so I only got a few trades done, so don't do what I did! Luckily when I went to the movie later on I was braver, but I still have like ten of my own bracelets left :(

I'm doing pretty good, my summer is going well! I can't wait to hear about how amazing your show is! <3

[rising-volteccers]

Whenever I see Friede get inconvenienced in the episodes, I can't pass up the chance to write something out of it. One of my close friends said that it's an endearing trait of mine to see an opportunity for h/c and jump on it, so here's a short, self indulgent piece post HZ030 haha!

Series: Pokemon Horizons

Characters: Friede, Murdock

--

After they've finished breakfast out on the deck, everyone pitched in to clean up the table. Diana, Liko and Roy carried used dishes while Mollie and Orla picked up other dishware before heading towards the kitchen. That left Friede and Murdock to do the heavy lifting by putting away the foldable table and chairs brought out from the meeting room.

When Friede bent down to pick up a couple of chairs, a strange wave of dizziness hit him. He just about prevented himself from falling over by reaching out to the nearest object for support. In this case, Murdock bit back a yelp from the abrupt hand that clasped his shoulder.

“H-Hey! I was carrying–oh, are you alright?” When Murdock looked over his shoulder, he found Friede with his other hand on the table, head dipped while he took in deep, steadying breaths.

“Yeah, ‘m fine,” Friede eventually responded. Once the dizziness passed, he pulled away from Murdock, blinking rapidly until his friend’s worried visage came into view. Friede automatically wore an assuring smile. “Sorry, guess I moved too quickly.”

“Are you sure about that? I can handle things if you need to sit down.”

“Pretty sure! It was just a one time thing. Now come on, let's not keep the others waiting! There's a mountain of stuff to clean up, yeah?”

Friede once again reached for the chairs, though this time he made sure to move a little more carefully. Aside from feeling oddly tired, he didn't get any other dizzy spells throughout the walk towards the kitchen.

Afterwards, he could tell that Murdock kept a subtle eye on him by giving him lighter tasks. As that strange fatigue persisted, Friede didn't object to the lessened workload. It already took effort to act normally around the rest of the crew until they were done.

While everyone else left the kitchen to go about their day, Friede hung back until it was just him and Murdock left. Only then did he plop down onto a chair, legs splayed with his head resting atop folded arms.

For the next ten or so minutes, Murdock focused on drying up the washed dishes so he could store them away. He didn’t start up a conversation with Friede, opting to give his friend some time to rest. Perhaps then he’d share how he truly felt. Once he put away the tableware, Murdock went to the table and took a seat on the empty chair next to Friede’s.

“Are you sure you're alright? You look wiped and it's only after breakfast,” Murdock questioned, breaking the silence that had settled in the kitchen. That concerned look made an appearance again on his face.

Friede turned his head till his half lidded eyes met Murdock's. “Yeah, I'm pretty sure I'm fine. Don't know why I got really tired all of a sudden.”

“Think it's a sign that you're getting sick?” If that was the case, Murdock would have to bring out the recipe for his soups that he’d make whenever one of them felt unwell. 

“No, at least I don’t think so. I don’t feel sick or anything. Just tired,” Friede replied, eyes sliding shut. “Which is weird cause I got enough sleep last night. Had a nice breakfast too so that should’ve energized me. Instead it feels like my energy got sapped.”

“Huh, that is weird.” Murdock crossed his arms as he tried to figure out what other reason led to his friend’s strange lethargy. Since Friede wasn’t on night shift yesterday, Murdock more or less trusted that he spoke the truth about getting enough sleep. He was also right in that eating the hearty breakfast prepared should have given him the energy to go about his day, not drain it.

What was different about today? Everyone ate together on the deck, though half the Pokemon didn’t really touch their food because they were asleep–

Wait, that’s it!

“You drank out of that Sinistea earlier.”

“Yeah? Nastiest thing I’ve tasted–oh. Oh.” Friede suddenly groaned out loud, burying his face into his arms again. Murdock can’t quite catch his grumblings but he was certain it involved his misgivings towards the Sinistea.

“You can’t really blame the little one. From how Diana put it, that Sinistea was just recently born. It didn’t know any better.”

“Yeah, yeah. I know.” Friede once again turned his head to look at Murdock, sporting quite the miserable expression now that the mystery had been solved. People who accidentally ingested Sinistea not only got their tastebuds ruined, they also get their vitality sapped away. Seeing that the Sinistea was recently born and he almost immediately spat out the liquid, it didn’t really get into his body. Still, he probably accidentally swallowed some in his surprise, triggering its effects however delayed it was.

“At least we know the cause. I’m guessing what you need now is plenty of rest to replenish the energy?”

“Yeah. I already did plenty of that before…” Friede recalled the previous week of being laid out for a few days due to his bruised back. It dampened his mood to know that he’d have to rest some more in order to recover. He really felt like the universe was out for him with how the past couple of weeks went. 

“It’s only until you’ve got your energy back.” Murdock did look sympathetic. He knew all too well how Friede got when he was forced to slow down and rest for long periods of time. “How about you go back to your room and see about getting some sleep? Maybe you’ll feel better after a nap.”

Friede groaned once more but eventually, he did push himself into sitting up again. Running a hand down his face, his eyes flicker to Murdock. 

“You got things handled?”

“Yeah, you can trust me. Get some rest. I’ll wake you up for lunch later.”

Murdock reached out to offer a hand for Friede to take when he stood up. He didn’t look dizzied from the action so Murdock trusted him to make it safely back to his room. Once Friede left the kitchen, Murdock headed towards the fridge to pull out some ingredients. Perhaps a hearty stew was just what Friede needed to boost his energy later…

[shebeafancyflapjack]

Don't Wake Me Up

Follow on from Lost Little Witch, ft @idiotwithanipad 's OC Amy.

-

"Uhh, hi?"

Silver sat upright, turning her head towards the voice. A head has poked itself out from the fridge door; black hair and a chunky pair of earphones framing the face of a girl her own age.

"Woah, sorry, uhm...Didn't mean to disturb you, or if you were planning on sleeping here...on the floor, if that's something you do." The girl apologised when she saw Silver's stricken face, fear clenching in her chest at being discovered.

The Pagan didn't reply. Keep mouth shut. Talking is useless anyway.

"This probably looks weird as fuck, right? Honestly, I don't make a habit of hiding in the fridge. Just that one of the waiters left an open can of Monster in there and I didn't want it to go to waste." The strange girl gave her a crooked smile.

None of those words made much sense. Why were there waiters in the house? Alison could barely afford to have builders on the site, let alone her own staff. What was a monster doing in a can in the fridge?

At least this was beginning to feel more like a regular dream, in that it had moments of complete nonsense.

Silver hugged her knees to her chest and waited for the strange girl to leave.

"Ohhkay, how about we start over." Instead of disappearing back inside the white container, she stepped out, wearing a baggy black hoodie, a blue tartan skirt, ripped leggings and a pretty kickass pair of boots beneath some beige legwarmers. Silver blinked. Her kind of style...

Of course her brain would invent something new but also familiar.

The girl sat on the floor in front of her, crossing her legs.

"I'm Amy. I died here nearly ten years ago. Choked on an energy drink. Trust me, I wish that was a joke." She snorted, then picked at her legwarmers, "I like your boots. They're pretty sick."

Sick? Why would she like them if they were sick? Is she making fun of her, like the girls at school?

Silver wants to compliment her boots. Her mouth opens, but the words die before reaching her tongue.

There was a pause as the other girl seemed to struggle to keep the conversation going one-sided.

"Humphrey said you're a witch? That's awesome. Did you ever, like, curse anyone?" She then bit her lip; "Oh fuck, sorry if that's offensive or anything. I'm just going by what I've seen in movies. You like horror films? They're some of my favorites but most of these guys are proper scardey cats!"

Silver's lip twitched in the corner as a memory threatened to re-emerge from the depths. Movie night. Her choice. Blair Witch Project. Everyone, including Alison and even Robin, cowering behind pillows or the sofa as the protagonists descended into the basement.

Has the girl seen it? There was almost no gore in the film, would she think it tame by some of the other stuff she's probably seen? She should ask. She wants to ask.

Silver takes a breath and opens her mouth.

Then shuts it.

Amy seems to take note of the failed attempt. She shuffles forward. Silver flinches, hands trembling.

"Look....I know you can speak." She said, bluntly.

Silver gasped, frowning.

"I didn't mean to eavesdrop, I just heard you whispering while I was in the fridge." Amy said, defensively. "The others all think you just forgot how to but...You can still talk. Can't you?"

Whimpering, Silver hugged her knees and shook her head. No, no, no, no.

How much had she heard?!

"Hey! I get it!" Amy said, raising her hands, "I'm not always the most sociable person either. This is probably the most anyone has got me to talk, so well done. My first week here I barely spoke to anyone and hid in my room because they all kept trying to poke their nose in. Well, you know what they're like."

The Pagan continued to pick and pinch at the sheaves on her hands. Yes. The others could be very...overwhelming. Or they had been to her at first, then she appeared once a month to annoy them all in kind.

"Robin and Kitty are cool though. They're probably my best friends, even if Robin likes to act more like an irritating uncle most of the time." Amy continued, "Kitty's fun but can sometimes be too much energy for me, especially in the mornings. Pat's not too bad. The others, depends what mood I'm in. Mary, I..."

"Ma."

Amy paused for a moment at the single syllable uttered from her new companion.

"Yeah, Mary...I mean she's always been kind, but...I always thought she was quiet. Always looked a little sad when she thought no one was watching. I can see why now." She said, softly.

Guilt twisted inside Silver.

"Ma..." She didn't want Mary to be sad. She shouldn't be sad anymore. Not after all this time. She's moved on, surely. No one would still be crying over her.

"She seems over the moon now though. The moment she saw you in the basement was the happiest she's ever sounded." Amy continued, "Oh! And those guys, the plague ghosts? They're kinda like family to me too. Sometimes I get along with them better than the upstairs lot. We, uhm...have similar health issues. Don't worry, I ain't infected, ha." Amy chuckled, "Not with anything contagious. But they...They get me. But still not as much as Humphrey. Or 'Dad', I should say."

Silver met her eyes, brow furrowed in confusion. She could let all the other random info wash over her like nonsense but that...was a strange detail.

"Yeah, can you believe it? I died and ended up with a dad." Amy smiled and rolled her eyes, "Not exactly what I imagined I'd get in Heaven but....I never had a dad, so the bar was on the floor. And he's....He's always been there for me. Patient with me, more than most are. So, few years ago, Alison made it all official. Proper certificate and everything. And now I'm officially Amy Bone! Fuck, if I told my friend Shan that I'm now technically a 'Lady', she'd pull a stitch from laughing her arse off."

Silver blinked.

"Humphrey has no daughter."

The words came out as clear as day. Autonomous.

Amy gave her a funny look, "Well, not by blood he don't, no, but as he said, that don't mean anything. He wants to be my dad and I'm cool with that so he's my dad."

"Humphrey has no daughter."

She repeats it. Fact. Break the rules. Disrupt the matrix.

Amy tenses and shuffles back a bit.

"He might not have when you were around but he does now. You got a problem with it?" She asked, defensively; "Or with me?"

Silver slapped the floor beside her.

"You don't belong here."

"What?" Amy startled.

"You shouldn't be here! Wrong! You're all wrong! Wrong! Wrong! You don't belong here! Go away!" Her voice rose with each syllable, her hand slamming on the floor with enough force to crack a tile if she were real.

"Fucking Jesus Christ!" Amy jumped to her feet; "Who the fuck are you to tell me where I belong?! You think I chose to die in this place!? You don't think I tried to escape for the first few years?! Or make myself disappear like you did?!"

Silver gripped her hair and closed her eyes.

"Stop talking! Stop talking! You're not real! None of this is real! It should all be the same, always the same, but you're not, you're new! New and wrong! New and WRONG!"

"Fuck you, you crazy witch bitch! I'm not the one who should leave! You can do us all a favour and go back to the fucking dirt!"

"STOMPY!"

Both girls froze as Robin passed through the wall in time to hear Amy's tirade. She looked at him, her eyes red with angry tears.

Mary followed in shortly after, quickly rushing to where Silver sat.

"Darling girl! You scared the deadings daylights outta me!"

She knelt beside the quivering girl and tried to gather her into her arms.

But Silver continued to glare at Amy, as if she was the main disturbance here. For the tortured Wiccan, she was. She was the anomaly. The house becoming a hotel and Alison moving away were all changes based on things her mind would have caught before. It made sense she would dream about.

But never before has her mind conjured a whole person. A girl with her own backstory and personality. A girl who was trying to be her friend. It was all strange and new enough to be....real.

And it can't be. It can't ever be.

"Wrong! Wrong! Wrong! Wrong!" She points a shaking finger at Amy before trying to scramble away from Mary's worried embrace; "Get away, get away, get away, get away..."

Amy grit her teeth, struggling to hold back tears.

"I was trying to be friendly. Fuck that." She scoffed.

Robin's brief anger cooled into sympathy. He wiped her face with his sleeve.

"It fine. Go find dad. We sort this." He told her, gently.

Silver continued to mutter and cry, utterly hysterical, as the girl turned to give her one sad look before disappearing through the door.

Her absence didn't solve anything.

Why isn't she waking up? Why isn't she back in the dirt? How can she feel the warmth of Mary's hands on her face? When Robin comes to kneel beside her, how can she feel his furs?

Stop it. Stop it.

Don't make it real. Don't make her want to stay.

He won't like it if she tries to stay.

[nokaru]

Friend! Do you have any songs that remind you of Umihebi and/or Torou, together or individually??

Oh my darling you have no idea...sorry this took so long I got tired ahhh

I made this playlist ages ago, it's still in my drafts here too - never got around to actually posting it BUT it's here! I dub thee UmiTorou playlist: toxic gfs commiting crimes

I'll go about this the same way I would with other playlist posts so here are selected few with some commentary and lyrics ^^ putting it under read more

girl in red - You Stupid Bitch

Don't bite your lip or grit your teeth Just count to ten and try to breathe You stupid bitch, can't you see The perfect one for you is me?

need i say more? this is so UmiTorou. I see this song from Torou's pov, trying to chat up Umihebi after there was something between them already. (bonus points for girl in red and the beat)

Beabadoobee - The Perfect Pair

You ought to know that I think we're one and the same I don't think we could help it No, I don't think we could help it We don't talk much Guess 'cause nothing has changed And I'm not sure I like it And I'm so tired of fighting

perfect pair they sure are, also Beadadoobee's voice is giving UmiTorou if they were lo-fi. Something about being obviously bad for each other but also so so perfect for this one person only.

AURORA - Cure For Me

I run from the liars, the fuel on the fire I know I created myself I know I can't fight the sad days and bad nights But I never asked for your help

You got hurt No, we don't belong together So you took the love from my arms Into the arms of yours But I don't need a cure for me I don't need it

This one reminds me more of Umihebi and Torou individually (but also as a couple) - esp the "I created myself" line. I love evil women and implications they are the way they are because of nobody than themselves. No man involved for backstory, I am who I am because I chose this kinda deal.

The Brobecks - Visitation of the Ghost

You think that I don't know your game A pretty, pretty, pretty little face Despite every book and every little kiss you took She'll take your place

Umihebi to Torou, while they still danced around each other like they are not obsessed with each other sigh.

CRAWLERS - Come Over (again)

Take her name out of your mouth You don't deserve to mourn You just love the attention Or do you get bored? You like the power you have Hope you get caught in the law Do you think that you're happy? Just wait 'til you're sure

This is actually one of my Umihebi character songs cause it fits perfectly with my OCs and their relatioship with Umi + Umi origins. Basically Umihebi getting kicked around for her arrogant behaviour part 1

Mitski - A Pearl

You're growing tired of me You love me so hard and I still can't sleep You're growing tired of me And all the things I don't talk about Sorry, I don't want your touch It's not that I don't want you Sorry, I can't take your touch It's just that I fell in love with a war Nobody told me it ended And it left a pearl in my head And I roll it around every night Just to watch it glow Every night, baby, that's where I go

UmiTorou rocky relatioship 0.2, they are both complicated people (one more than the other) and they just CAN'T talk about it. Over their dead bodies.

The Dresden Dolls - My Alcoholic Friends

I'm trying hard Not to be ashamed Not to know the name Of who is waking up beside me Or the date, the season or the city But at least the ceiling's very pretty Should I choose a noble occupation? If I did I'd only show up late and sick And they would stare at me with hatred Plus my only natural talent's wasted on my alcoholic friends

Torou song right there!! Yes, maybe a bit cheesy but just listen to it...its so Torou and Obi coded. While Obi might have chosen the noble occupation, Torou (mind you not inherently evil) can't see herself as anything else than what she is now. She won't let go of her current life, just the thought of losing the freedom of it makes her sick.

Epic the Musical - My Goodbye

You are reckless Sentimental at best That's not a teaching of mine You've grown soft Your dead friends can attest Put your emotions aside You're a warrior Meant to lead the rest I don't know where I went wrong But I warned you And you failed the test

Umihebi getting kicked around by my OC for development part 2 (after getting arrested !!gone physical!! :0)

Chappell Roan - Pink Pony Club

I'm having wicked dreams of leaving Tennessee Hear Santa Monica, I swear it's calling me Won't make my mama proud, it's gonna cause a scene She sees her baby girl, I know she's gonna scream God, what have you done?

this became crazy Umihebi centric so this one is purely Torou song. I mean Chappell was made for her come on now...why Pink Pony Club? It's the vibes + my wife iilfal's fanfic about Torou's backstory (tho only vaguely). Also the line "I'm gonna keep on dancing" is so Torou and her lay-back personality. She would be the bomb in any club.

[lostonehero]

Potential time travel to YouTube au

Note that this takes place right after Micheal's livestream rants, and Henry is trying to find him to comfort him

Henry's lungs burned as he ran from Michael's apartment, his body protested as he ran through the streets as the storm started. "Micheal! Micheal please it's ok, I I didn't know." He doesn't realize it's easier to breathe and his body isn't aching at the exercise

The rain comes down harder as lightening flashes in the sky and a crash of thunder screams through the air.

He shouts. "Micheal please, Micheal." He is soaked to the bone as he runs into a alleyway he doesn't notice how things look different like the old has become new

A small child maybe nine or ten wearing clothes too big for his small frame is curled up by a dumpster

Henry freezes those are the clothes Micheal was wearing, but this child is too small and alive to be him. He scoops the child up. Two blue eyes state up at him, and he freezes again, his breath caught in his throat. "Michael?"

Micheal is clinging to Henry as Henry numbly walks home. His car isn't where he parked it.

He's soaked to the bone when he goes home, and so is Micheal, who looks like a drowned rat. He doesn't notice the drawing from his daughter or his wife in the kitchen.

(They divorced only a few months after Charlie was killed They couldn't stand each other because everything just was too much They reconnected later on amd became friends Henry helped her through chemo later on in life and she remarried and had a family and he supported her, her new kids call him uncle)

"Henry? I've been worried sick. I've been waiting for hours. William said you were on your way home before the storm started, and he left before you. I called his home and he said you weren't there." Margret steps back at Henry's condition, and there's a child clinging to him. "Henry? Henry, what did you do?"

Henry frowns. "I didn't know you were visiting this week, Margaret. I thought the grandkids had that school thing you were excited about." It doesn't even click that his home is the way it was before. "Can you help get a warm bath started, I know the bathroom is a mess. I'm in the middle of redoing it."

Margaret rushes over. "Henry, what has gotten into you? You're soaked to the bone. Are you drunk?"

"I haven't touched that stuff in ages. You know that I'm sober." He puts Micheal down as he grabs a towel from the hall closet and straps the boy of his wet clothes, and puts him in a towel. "Huh, this old thing looks brand new."

Margaret recognizes the boy. "You took William's son? Henry, what nonsense are you talking about? You kidnapped a child!"

Henry furrows his brows, finally looking at Margaret. "Kidnapped? Wait.... Margaret, why do you look so young, and your hair is long? You haven't had it that long since before....."

Micheal shivers, holding the towel around him like a blanket. He points to the calendar in the hall.

Henry pushes past Margaret and stares at the calendar. His face grows pale as his face morphs into a look of horror. "Margaret, we need to talk."

"Damn right, Henry, you're drunk and kidnapped your partner kid off the street in the rain. What the hell were you thinking?"

Micheal pulls the towel around him. "Uncle Henry, I don't think I want Father to find me again."

Margaret sits at the kitchen table as Henry helps Micheal tie off the shirt and underwear he has to borrow. "Kid, you're as skinny as before."

Micheal shrugs, enjoying the glass of milk he has.

"Margaret, you have to understand... this will be a lot." Henry frowns.

"You better be convincing Henry Emily, or I will be calling the cops."

Micheal finishes his glass. "I can't remember the last time I've drank something. Did it always feel like that? Hi Miss Margaret again, sorry I didn't say something before." He sits up straight, and his facial expression betrays the age he's supposed to be. "I apologize, but uh, we aren't supposed to be here, I mean, yeah, we are, but also not." He pauses, kicking his feet. "I can't believe I was this small before.... "

"Micheal...." Henry sighs.

"Right right, sorry, I've got the knowledge about this... uh, right, so... wait, I can't use that comparison. Uh, so for us, our minds, at least not our bodies, obviously, actually thankfully I'm not like I was or will be.."

Henry smiles and looks at Margaret.

Margaret looks a bit pensive like she is starting to realize that isn't a child mind in that body.

"It's uh our minds are from our body in the year 2023... yeah, yeah, I know, like 40 something years from now.... but it's true I can prove it, I have like three degrees unofficially and never did get the chance to go to college before I was scooped.... right, I am also an expert at stitching any material, and I bet I can build something better than William if I so desired. Granted, I'm more of an artist than him. I painted the walls of my apartment... wait, I don't have that film over my vision anymore."

Henry sighs. "Micheal I think that's enough. Margaret we've been divorced for awhile from where I'm at in life. It happened after... after... oh she's here."

Micheal frowns. "Oh.... " He hops down from his chair. "I'll uh be in the guest room..."

[traumasurvivorshelpingsurvivors]

tw: sa (csa?), coercive control, physical and verbal abuse, brief mentions of suicide/self-harm/ED

seeking support, validation, advice

Ten years ago, when I was 14, I was forced into a relationship with a boy I went to high school with. He was very mature for his age and i was very naive, and at the time I was left homeless due to my abusive father, possibly had an eating disorder; and I feel like he completely exploited my situation.

Over the span of six months sexual interactions were very frequent. He would force himself onto me and get violent and verbally abusive if I didn’t respond the way he wanted me to. He would hurt me and I would be too afraid to ask him to stop. I didn’t even know what consent was at the time; i was so afraid and I was completely frozen and always felt sick. I have so many gaps in memory too which I hate.

I wasn’t allowed to have friends and I was forbidden to go out anywhere. He admitted to wanting me to be jealous of him, as well as telling me how jealous i make him feel. He would embarrass me in public and trivialise everything I did. It became easier to just stop liking things.

He verbally and physically abused me multiple times, go through EVERYTHING on my phone, controlled what I wore, isolated me from everyone. Everything I did was always wrong. I had nowhere to go, no one to be with except for him. I had no control over my life. I became suicidal and started self harming which seemed to give him pleasure.

People around me just seemed to ignore everything, no one protected me or questioned anything he did.

He then broke up with me saying “You’re holding me back from my life” and that I “emotionally abused” him. So for years I felt like I was a really awful person. He then started dating one of my friends that he isolated me from as she was “not a nice person”. So this just added another layer of confusion and isolation.

For 10 years I’ve been struggling with unending anxiety, depression, guilt, nightmares, irritability, hypervigilance, social withdrawal, etc. He completely stripped me of all identity, i was nothing for so many years afterwards. He destroyed every friendship I had. And I only recently started to make progress on having confidence and identity as an individual and also accepting that he raped and abused me… but then all of a sudden he started following my mother and my old childhood best friend on Instagram - he also tried following my inactive, private account there too. I felt like my entire being was under threat again. I felt so ill. Just the entitlement he still feels he has over my life… even after all these years?? seriously?!

And I honestly don’t think he will ever understand what he actually did to me. Anytime I try to speak up against him people always defend him as if I’m just being bitter. Why would people choose him over me?

I feel more affected now than i did 10 years ago, and having him still lurking around makes me feel so unsafe and violated. I don’t know what he wants from me??

It just confuses me because we were pretty much the same age so I don’t feel valid in accepting it was csa. And also being so young and in a physically abusive relationship just seems so strange.

I have no one to talk to about this situation, i have no support network, and everyone likes him. ~ This is my first time speaking as I am so tired of being silent. I’m just so confused.

~ Rocky 🎀

Hi Rocky 🎀,

First of all thank you for sharing your story. It takes a lot of bravery and strength to come forward, and please know that we believe and support you.

I'm so sorry about what you've been through. It sounds like your abuser was controlling and manipulative, and I'm so sorry that you had to go through all of that. Please know you're not alone. I was in a remarkably similar situation.

It honestly doesn't matter whether or not he remembers what he did because it doesn't change the fact that he still did it, you know? Also I'm really sorry to hear that people have been defending him. Unfortunately there will always be people like this, but that also means that they aren't necessarily on the right side of things. You know the truth better than them.

If you can, blocking him and encouraging your friends and family to do so as well might help, but definitely keep an eye out and consider documenting anything he tries to do to you.

Please know that age gaps are not the only ways that abusers take advantage of their victims. Other factors can definitely play a part as well, such as gender, cultural or religious beliefs, language barriers, immigration status, substance abuse, physical disabilities, intellectual disabilities, economic dependence, geographical isolation, and a lack of a social support network.

I hope I could help. If anyone has any comments or suggestions, feel free to add on. Please let us know if you need anything.

-Bun

[cutieforbear]

i think i'm really just the most scared that you'll yoink again.

you've chosen her over me before.

i know you were hurting and reeling from me breaking your heart.

i was sick. i was a kid trying to find myself and i needed to go first to have the power, because giving you all of me and all of the power to break me nearly killed me.

then you chose her. i genuinely remember it like it was yesterday, tattood on the back of my eyelids.

the ambivalence you chose her with. the way you phrased it waiting for me to bite. and i didn't that day. biggest regret of my life.

you've cheated on her twice with me. funny how history repeats itself. you cheated on her with me this time ten years ago. and now here i am being alongside again while she gets to call you hers. sneaking around with you and not telling anyone because of the shame. but i'd rather be yours on the side, than not yours at all.

i've noticed you don't call you "mine" the same way i'm yours. it makes me really sad.

i know you say we just came back on the cusp of both of our relationships ending. but i don't know that. i don't know if either of us would have had the guts to leave if we hadn't found our way back to each other.

and i really really really want you to leave her. but i really really really can't wait another two months to know if you're really going to do it. i know it's not your accuse to stall. but it feels like you are.

i don't want to be the only reason you go through a big ass divorce. but also just once i want to be yours. completely yours and your first choice. i want to love you like i'm 16 again without a care in the world. like we're on the top of the mountain and you're kissing me without a care in the world.

i want to hard launch our relationship with a photo of us kissing on the doorstep and make her realise it was me all along.

i'm maybe a bit petty. i'm sorry.

"i'll get your longing glances, she'll get your ring" because i'm the foolish one.

and yet "i choose you n me, religiously"

"At least I can say that I paved the way

But I get the heartbreak and she gets your last name.....

I just haven't had a love like it since you

You're the greatest I've ever known

And I'm some flame from (10) years ago

You moved on so fast as soon as you knew her

Left me in the past to run toward the future

She's the one you're walking home

You don't think much 'bout a stepping stone".

I love you, Bear.

[mistwraiths]

4 stars

People had to wait a WHOLE YEAR for the next one. Wild.

So, overall, I did enjoy this book for the most part.

I both love Evangeline and want to bonk her on her empty head because girl is literally SO DUMB and gullible. She loves love. She wants a happy ever after. Like girl be serious please but maybe I'm just a cynical, jaded person. She is ENTIRELY too trusting and too forgiving, and it feels unfortunately that she's a little TOO passive in her story. Things are happening mostly TO her and she's reacting. She's really not doing a whole lot. Sorry, she's in a library for ten days I guess reading books.

The main things in this book are Apollo and her getting cursed, the stones, learning some information, and opening the Valory Arch. That's it. Stephanie, you say, that sounds like a lot! It's not though! Home girl literally finds the arch BY HAPPENSTANCE LOL. She's like oh I'm not going to open the arch!!! And then starts smearing her blood on the first fucking thing she finds and SURPRISE it's the arch. But it doesn't open without the stones. That's however the way the story kind of works though. She writes a whole damn letter telling herself not to trust Jacks and promptly forgets about it. She randomly comes across the stones by going "oh surely they will be at this party!" or shocker, the place they stay at has it.

For a girl getting HUNTED, there's surprisingly little of it. In fact, she spends the majority getting wounded. Apollo harms her. She gets harmed by Apollo getting harmed too. And then within less than 10-20 pages, Jacks is hurt too. I love a hurt/comfort moment but there's a lot in a short time. Also, I kind of got tired of Evangeline constantly being in pretty dresses. Like you're being HUNTED, maybe actual shoes? Some pants for better movement?

I was surprised by LaLa cursing Evangeline. But Jacks identity and Chaos' identity, and what was in Valor Arch, and the monster, I was able to guess. It all seemed kind of obvious.

Look, I love Jacks and I'm rooting for him and Evangeline. I love the idea of maybe growing into a true love or you can have multiple true loves, or a second chance, or other different possibilities of maybe you don't get your true love but you find a love that is true to you at a certain time and place. I'm much more eloquent on this subject when I'm not sick. But I don't think Stephanie Garber really delves anywhere into this deep enough or maybe she just doesn't have anything to say really about it. But I find it so fucking annoying about the Donatella part being his true love. Again, I could get behind true love rejecting him. But the fact that she DID get affected and then just didn't die just doesn't sit right with me. I don't think it was done well and it leaves me annoyed about it when it's brought up.

This book brings up a lot of things over and over that we already know about. Jacks and his true love, his fatal kiss, his being a Fate and not human is constantly stuffed down our throat. Other things constantly being repeated. Trust your readers in that we remember shit. Also Luc was so annoying in this book why is he even here still in this story?

I was going to be SO ANNOYED if Jacks really did go back to Donatella. But the fact that Evangeline DIED was hysterical and a shock. And then it continued on. Jacks used the stones. Apollo becoming a sudden villain was honestly so fucking out of left field??? It felt BIZARRE. Also, the ending left me with some questions. If the helm was likely put on to control him and they couldn't control him, why after all this time does Honora just take it off?? Why didn't he eat his family if he's so out of control?? Also, where did the power of memories come from from Apollo? I know there was a Valor with memories but like... is Apollo Arcadian or a Valor?

I'm interested to read the next but like what even. This is like the most frightening, controlling, near domestic violence type of thing. I'm curious to see how long it'll last and how she acts/how she feels/what happens next.

[blackshadowswriter]

*heavy breathing* OH MY FUCKING GOD HOLY SHIT THAT WAS AMAZING IM-🫨⁉️

Alright I'm going to be so loud about this so page break

First off, bestie, the fact that you not only remembered my bday but also wrote a fic??? For me??? WHEN I TELL TOU I SHRIEKED IM NOT KIDDING HOW ARE YOU SO FUCKING AMAZING AND SWEET AND THOUGHTFUL AND JUST SKDHDJAJKD IM CRYING I LOVE YOU SO MUCH GIRL THANK YOU FOR THIS YOU ARE THE BEST FRIEND ON THIS PLANET 😭🖤🖤🖤

Also pls don't apologize for being late when I'm almost a MONTH late, I swear I saw it when you posted (RAN when I got the notif), but I GOT SICK AGAIN 😭🤧 for like the second time in three weeks, and I was so miserable, and this was totally what I needed to get me excited again. And then FINALS hit me so fucking hard this year (istg they get worse every year), and I have been UNDER SIEGE fr, but today is legit my last day WHICH IS SO FUNNY BC IT'S ALSO TAYLOR'S BIRTHDAY TODAY SO IK I HAD TO COME BACK TO THIS

BUT LIKE GIRL HOW CAN YOU DOUBT THIS MASTERPIECE? I LOVE this so much I’m legit speechless, like you spent two days writing this?? FOR ME???? I am so honored like what 😭 what did I do to deserve you, you are the most amazing human ever ilysm 😍🖤🖤

like not only did you give me the cutest fluffiest fic ever but also the effort you put in with the Taylor references? ILYSM MARRY ME BESTIE 😍 I love how we both keep feeding each others obsessions and this was a fucking feast because let me tell you, I thought this was going to have references from New Years Day which is one of my favorite reputation songs but when I started reading and realized it was FULL of ALL the Taylor references I- 🤭 simultaneously have no words and am screaming inside rn

I legit pulled up a doc to write down all the references as I read and started pyscho-analyzing every single line for them, I'm going so crazy over this omggg

Also I'm so sorry if I miss any references, bestie, I'm scrawling this down and giggling like a mad woman (😉) while blowing my nose and coughing every ten seconds.

Starting off with the “once in a lifetime” it’s legit like you know how reobsessed I’ve been with Speak Now and I fucking love Timeless so much so this opening line had me legit gasping out loud like a dramatic hoe😭

“Those stupid love songs on the radio and the endless romantic stories of your friends’ dating lives, however, fueled your need for the same kind of connection only a few songwriters know how to put into words” TAYLOR KNOWS

"But deep down, you craved to find someone who wouldn’t be afraid of sticking around, someone who would never leave you because life tends to get hard." I'm not sure if this was intentional, but this right here just screams The Archer to me like it's totally giving "who could ever leave me, darling, but who could stay?" and I LOVE IT

The combination of "burning red" and "golden like daylight" PERFECT. Okay for a second I thought "burning red" was from Red and then I remembered the line in Daylight with "burning red" in it, and I'm not sure which one you mean, but I never thought about how those two songs compliment each other so well, BUT IT WORKS, so you're a genius for this one, bestie 🙌

"A love fighting for" 🤝 "tells me this love is worth the fight" AFTERGLOW I LOVE THIS

"So perhaps that is why you chose to lock yourself away and live in delusion instead." OMFG right where you left me is one of my favorite evermore songs everrr, and I love that line "did you hear about the girl who lives in delusion" SO MUCH

"Truth be told, when you’re your own worst enemy and have an inner saboteur...In an attempt to erase all the problems, you became the problem." Anti-hero babyyyy, but also LITERALLY US LMAO

"chasing ghosts that stayed long in the past" Omgg this line reminds me of "chasing shadows in the grocery line" for some reason

And "only came back to haunt the living shit out of you" I'm not sure if this is meant for Haunted, but I love that so so so much, and I'm hallucinating with a maybe fever rn so I kinda think it is

"Blood rushed to his cheeks" SO SCARLET IT WAS MAROON

"you knew that you’d somehow been enchanted to meet him" this is totally feeding my reobsession with Speak Now and I LOVE YOU FOR THAT BESTIE.

"It is possible that the song playing over the speakers in the café right before you bumped him played a part in how you perceived the interaction. You’ve never been one to believe in coincidences. Nothing is ever accidental, and neither was your meeting. It couldn’t have been." MASTERMINDDDDD I LOVE THAT SONG SMM

"Summer that year was cruel" 😎😎

"you didn’t have it in you to put a label on whatever delicate thing was starting to build" 👉 we can't make any promises now, can we, babe 😭😭

"Love is a fragile thing" IT COULD BURN OUT (no because I've always heard "thing" in the song until I checked the lyrics of I Know Places and realized it's "flame" and it blew my mind)

"He let out a grunt. Your name passed his lips. He sounded so weak" maybe I should go to bed bc I'm a little delirious, but I started giggling, "your name on my lips, tongue-tied, free rent living on my mind" and it totally doesn't fit the vibe, but this just reminds me of it 😂

When he woke up to you hovering over him, he groaned. “I’m sorry,” was all he said. “I’d understand if–” This part totally made me laugh because poor Matty, my baby just woke up from passing out and he's still apologizing, bless his heart omg 😭

"coffees over empty takeout containers" this is making me want to go back to your Is It Over Now fic and reread because girl, I'm still not over it 😍

"kissing in the rain" The Way I Loved You is one of my favorite Fearless songs omg, I'm so happy it made it into the fic

"He is the best thing that has ever happened to you." You are the best thing that's ever been mine 😭 bro I'm so in love with how in love we are with Matt, like HE DESERVES THIS LOVE

"You saw something in him from the moment you met that no one can ever take away" you're on your own kid 🥺

"taste of heaven" UNTOUCHABLEEEE 🖤

"You are sunshine, even on your worst days, and he’s midnight rain. But you love the rain. You love him." UGH THIS LINE IS EVERYTHING. Not just the Midnight Rain reference, but I love how in love these two are omg. ALSO this might be me analyzing too deeply, but like I love how you took the original lyrics where it's like "midnight rain" and "sunshine," that they're opposites and that's why they didn't work, but HERE, the rain and sunshine are them complementing each other so well and being so sickeningly sweetly in love 😭

"He took your hand and asked you to dance" Fearlesss and Matt being so sweet, I can't with him 🥰

"You want more of those nights" Ahhh New New's Day!!! I WANT YOUR MIDNIGHTSS 😍

"You want him and all the strings attached to him" THIS IS MAKING ME THINK OF INVISIBLE STRING, I LOVE THAT SOMG SMM

"You want to wear his initial on a chain around your neck, in Braille...“I know I don’t own you,” he said to you, “but I love you. And I know you. I want you to carry me close to your heart the same way I’ll always carry you close to mine.” LOSING MY MIND AT THIS, MY FAVORITE LINE FROM CALL IT WHAT YOU WANT, "not because he owns me but because he really knows me" 😍 I am OBSESSED with this line, and with Matt is so perfect omg 🥺🖤

"All the girls he loved before don’t matter because he’s got you now" Another one of the songs I'm so obsessed with, like All of The Girls YOU LOVED BEFORE is one of my favorite songs ever and it fits so well with Matt, i love this sm

"All those memories replay in sudden flashing sequences" ooo this reminds me so much of Love Story and I feel like it goes perfectly with reader and Matt like they are so fluffy, Love Story just makes such perfect sense for them bc it's so sweet omg

"Matt Murdock is kneeling on the floor before you, the glitter, confetti, and sticky champagne" MORE NEW YEAR'S DAY REFERENCES OMG, I WAS WAITING FOR THIS 🙌 also CHAMPAGNE PROBLEMS AHH 😍 wait this is so perfect bc New Year's Day and champagne problems have such similar beginnings, so mashing them together is PERFECT. Idk if I'm right, but the confetti is giving Long Live "confetti falls to the ground" but maybe I'm just hallucinating (I just finished finals, and I'm like half dead)

"You would marry him with paper rings, that much is true." I LIKE SHINY THINGS BUT I'D MARRY YOU WITH PAPER RINGS, but reader is so real for this, I would totally marry Matt NO RING AT ALL JUST GIVE ME A CHANCE MATTY PLS

"He sees right through you. You see right through him" WAIT I might be overanalyzing again (the advanced comp this year really did that to me) but this just feels SO PERFECT to me, with the reference to The Archer bc at the beginning it was that line like "who could ever leave me but who could stay" and now we've come a full circle to the "do you see right through me" and YES, them seeing through each other in the best way and it's just 🤧i'm way too emotion rn but this is so cute im gonna cry

"Even in your worst times, you were there for each other" AHHH I LOVE THE REFERENCE TO DRESS I LOVE THAT SONG WITH ALL MY HEART

"You don’t need to tell him that you would do it a million times over because he knows" OMFG IS THIS FROM ILLICIT AFFAIRS (and a little from I Think He Knows?), MY FAVORITE FOLKLORE SONG ILYSM BESTIE

"And he will never be just the stranger that you bumped into" please dont ever become a stranger whose laugh I would recognize anywhere 🥺🥺 AND THEY WON'T BE, I LOVE THIS SM

"Maybe that was your plan all along. Maybe you are the mastermind he knows that you are. None of it was accidental." AHHH MORE MASTERMIND REFERENCESSS YESSS

"And now, Matt Murdock is yours. Forever and always." PULLING MY HAIR OUT, this was so fucking sweet 😭😭

Bestie, TYSM FOR THIS. I could never have expected this tooth-rottingly fluffy masterpiece, and the TAYLOR REFERENCES, I might be going crazy rn, but the effort you put in to include all of them and for me??? Like, how tf do I have such an amazing, talented best friend??? Thank you so much for writing this for me, this is seriously one of my favorite of your Matt fics now and that's saying something bc I love ALL OF THEM. THANK YOU BESTIE, YOU'RE THE BEST BEST FRIEND IN THE WHOLE WORLD, I LOVE YOU SO MUCH 😭🥺🖤🖤🖤🖤🖤

(also I know im so late to Taylor’s birthday BUT in my defense it’s still 11 pm here so TECHNICALLY I MADE IT)

New Year's Day | Matt Murdock x Reader

Masterlist

Pairing: Matt Murdock x Reader

Summary: You recount your history with Matt and the highs and the lows of your relationship.

Warnings: Fluff, descriptive writing & lack of dialogue, mentions of blood, but this is mostly very tame

Word count: 2.5k

A/n: This One-Shot is dedicated to my bestie, @blackshadowswriter. I'm a bit late, and I'm sorry for that. It took me a bit to finish. I just want to tell you how much I love and appreciate you. I also know you love Taylor, so I thought "why not write a fic and use as many song references as possible? She's going to LOVE that!" You're my favorite person in the world and you deserve this. I love you. I'm all out of words because I'm anxious as hell about showing you this. It took me two days to finish. I wanted it to be as good as I could make it. I'm still not 100% sure, but I never am when it comes to giving gifts. I hope you like it <3 (This is also why I'm not tagging anyone else because this is a gift for my best friend and I intended it as such)

From the moment you bumped into him on the corner street of your favorite café, you knew that he was the kind of chance that would only come around once in a lifetime.

It wasn’t like you, at least not back then, to buy a stranger a coffee. And it was even less like you to give him your number afterward.

You had never been big on dating at that point in your life. You used to take things exactly the way they came to you, and dating never really seemed to fit into that narrative.

You preferred to lose yourself in your own world, a world where no one could touch or hurt you the way you’ve been hurt so many times in the past by people who claimed to care about you—people who claimed to love you, and in the process, you lost sight of the fact that there are still a handful of good people out there.

No one can blame you for thinking like that though. Your heart has been broken one too many times, and not just by broken relationships. 

Deep down, you craved to find someone capable of understanding all of you, not just the pretty parts. You almost felt pathetic for pretending you didn’t need it and still thinking that way.

But deep down, you craved to find someone who wouldn’t be afraid of sticking around, someone who would never leave you because life tends to get hard.

It seemed nearly impossible to find a person like that without breaking your own heart, so you decided to retreat into your shell. Better to keep your heart safe and protected than put yourself out there and be broken all over again, right?

Those stupid love songs on the radio and the endless romantic stories of your friends’ dating lives, however, fueled your need for the same kind of connection only a few songwriters know how to put into words.

You wanted to fall in love, find the right person, and heal. You wanted to figure out why love wasn’t like the burning red of sex and passion but golden, like daylight. A love living for. A love fighting for.

You felt so stupid, secretly pining for an innocent childhood dream that eventually got crushed after years of heartbreak, but that is what happens when someone becomes chronically lonely. You turned to daydreaming because at least in your head, your life could be perfect. Not just good, not just livable, but filled with love and happiness.

Truth be told, when you’re your own worst enemy and have an inner saboteur set out to destroy everything that could be remotely good for you because you truly believe you don’t deserve it, it’s hard to allow yourself to be open. So perhaps that is why you chose to lock yourself away and live in delusion instead. Not facing reality became standard procedure in your way of life.

You tried blaming it on your past, your broken relationships, and disappointments, and while that played a big part in your trauma, you also slowly started to realize that you might have been hurting yourself so you wouldn’t have to open up ever again.

In an attempt to erase all the problems, you became the problem. You became your worst enemy, someone chasing ghosts that stayed long in the past and only came back to haunt the living shit out of you. But that’s a survivable condition. 

You tried therapy, you tried turning your life around and starting anew, and while that helped you find a job you love, find a nice group of friends, and make peace with what’s been broken, nothing else seemed to change. 

You had barely started putting yourself back together again when you bumped into him. You were late for a meeting, so your focus was on your phone instead of the street before you.

It was your fault. He was just trying to make his way over the sidewalk, his cane tapping in a steady rhythm to make his way forward, and you stepped right in the middle of it. 

You remember him grabbing your arm, catching you before you could fall. He wasn’t even irritated. When you looked up in shame, seeing the red glasses and the came, you begged for the floor to open up and swallow you whole. 

“I’m so sorry,” you said. “I wasn’t looking. Are you okay?”

But before you could go on a rant about your stupidity, he cut you off, and in the silkiest voice possible, he said, “I’m fine. Don’t worry about it. Are you?” 

“What?”

“Are you okay? You seem in a bit of a rush. Don’t want you to accidentally bump into a car next.” He chuckled, adjusting his glasses. Blood rushed to his cheeks. “That was a bad joke, sorry.”

You just about melted. “It’s okay,” you found yourself chuckling. “And so am I. I was too focused on my phone. That was my fault.”

“Don’t blame yourself. It happens,” he said. He was so calm about it, unlike other New Yorkers you’ve met before.

Maybe the fact that you found him extraordinarily attractive and easy to be around compelled you to ask if you could buy him a cup of coffee to make up for bumping into him, completely abandoning your plans to make it to your work meeting five minutes late.

He introduced himself as Matthew. A lawyer. Not one of those rich defense attorneys who simply do it for the money. No, he does it to help people, and you fell for him right then and there. 

Maybe it was fate, maybe it was destiny, or maybe it was just dumb luck, but that day, when you got home after work, his number in your phone and a stupidly giddy smile on your flushed face, you knew that you’d somehow been enchanted to meet him. 

You never believed in love at first sight until you bumped into Matt Murdock, but the second you did, your life flipped upside down and changed in ways you could have never predicted. 

It is possible that the song playing over the speakers in the café right before you bumped him played a part in how you perceived the interaction. You’ve never been one to believe in coincidences. Nothing is ever accidental, and neither was your meeting. It couldn’t have been. 

You found each other when you needed someone, anyone, both of you, and it stuck. Thankfully, it did. 

Summer that year was cruel with New York drowning in an excruciating heatwave. You’d been meeting up with Matt for a couple of weeks, but you didn’t have it in you to put a label on whatever delicate thing was starting to build between the two of you. You didn’t want to wrap your hand around it and accidentally shatter something you could see growing into something more in the future. 

He was unlike anyone you’d met before, and he treated you in a way that made you believe, finally, that you are worthy of love. Not just giving but receiving because Matt himself struggled to see his worth after years of being disappointed and being there for everyone but himself. 

Love is a fragile thing though, and you have never been quite good with fragile things.

After a night of drinking away your sorrows at a nearby bar, you made your way to his apartment. You took a cab, too wasted to find your way there by yourself. You remember that you were crying; you were miserable and loathing yourself for several reasons that didn’t even make sense to you then.

When you arrived there, you knocked on his door. You didn’t get an answer. Just as you started to turn around and make your way back outside, you could hear a thud from the other side of the door. Panic settled in. You didn’t even hesitate before you opened the door, which was surprisingly unlocked, and made your way into the dark interior of his apartment. 

Finding your blind, catholic not-boyfriend in a pool of his own blood, wearing a leather-clad suit with the horns of the devil had not been on your to-do list until that night. Reality hit you just as fast and knocked sobriety back into your senses as the adrenaline started to take over. 

He let out a grunt. Your name passed his lips. He sounded so weak, so fragile, and you just stood there, your heart pumping too much blood for your body to handle. 

“What the fuck?!” you said. You didn’t yell, you didn’t snap, you simply didn’t know how to process this information. 

You were well aware of the Devil of Hell’s Kitchen parading outside at night, beating up criminals and giving them a good fright—Matt did not fit the picture you had of the guy until you saw him lying there, obviously injured. 

“It’s not what it looks like,” he said hoarsely. He tried to roll over, but the pain turned out to be too severe. 

Needless to say, he passed out on you without a proper explanation, and you somehow had to use what little you could remember from first-aid to help this bleeding mess of a man. You feared that you would lose him that night, and that was when you realized that, on top of falling for him, you didn’t care who he was, you only needed him to live.

When he woke up to you hovering over him, he groaned. “I’m sorry,” was all he said. “I’d understand if–”

“Don’t talk,” you cut him off with a finger on his lips. You wouldn’t let him push you away. Not after everything you’d been through.

He tried to sit up. “I didn’t know how to tell you.”

“It’s not exactly something you lead with on a first date. I get it. What I don’t get…”

“I didn’t lie,” it was his turn to cut you off. You remember looking up at him, and you heard him out. You had to. In your mind, there is an explanation for everything, and you were once again proven right at that moment.

He bared his life story to you, how he survived through tragedies no human should ever have to face. How he turned blind, how his senses heightened, and how he lost the one person he could always count on. When his father died, something changed in Matt. He tried to go straight, to do his father proud, but he couldn’t ignore this desperate need for justice forever. He felt cursed. So, he became someone who could make a difference, and not just as a lawyer.

He expected you to walk out, but you didn’t. You saw him for who he was, and you accepted him.

“I think I’m falling for you, and it scares the hell out of me,” you blurted out that night.

He stared at you, his unfocused eyes bewildered, his lips moving soundlessly as he tried to find an answer.

Just when you thought he would break your heart after putting your trust in him, he let out a shaky sigh and he kissed you.

He wasn’t ready to say it back just yet, but he spoke to you through actions that made you feel confident in what you were growing again.

You somehow already knew back then that Matt Murdock would be the man you one day would marry and spend the rest of your life with. 

The truth is, you two have been through a lot throughout your relationship. It hasn’t always been smooth sailing, but you would be lying if you said that it wasn’t worth it. 

From the moment you met him to the countless dates, sharing coffees over empty takeout containers, kissing in the rain, Daredevil, fighting over the beautiful women in his life that almost broke you, and fighting over his desperate need to push those away who only want what is good for him because he is own worst saboteur.

It all led you down a journey that turned out to be harder than expected and not at all the love story you envisioned, but it still turned out to be the best thing that has ever happened to you. He is the best thing that has ever happened to you. 

You used to run away from happiness out of fear of getting hurt, and Matt did the same. He feared to admit it, but then he met you and he finally realized that running was of no use because you were more than ready to stick around through everything. Through every disaster and heartache—through every broken bone, you stuck around.

You saw something in him from the moment you met that no one can ever take away. You got a taste of heaven from the devil himself, and even though he was darker than the sunshine you wished for in your life, you managed to find a way to bring some light into his life. 

You are sunshine, even on your worst days, and he’s midnight rain. But you love the rain. You love him. 

Your first kiss happened in the rain. He took your hand and asked you to dance, and you did. You danced to the sound of the raindrops pattering against the asphalt beneath your feet, and it was the most beautiful thing you’ve ever seen—Matt engulfed in the soft moonlight, his hand in yours, and a big smile on his irresistible lips. 

You want more of those nights. Even the nights you’ve had to patch him up or hold him as he broke down from all the weight he often enough carries on his shoulders, you want more of those. You want all of them.

You want him and all the strings attached to him, no matter how painful because ever since he can remember, people have walked out on Matt and hurt him in ways you can only fathom. You don’t want to be that person. 

He opened up to you. He decided to be vulnerable. He stood with you through everything and fought for you when you thought you two wouldn’t last.

He gave you his best smile and his tears, and he laughed with you every night that you waited up for him to come home safely. He quickly became the moonlight to your sun—it is a different kind of light, but it is a light that sustains you nonetheless. 

You want all of his laughter and never miss it again. You want his smiles. You want his tears. You want to spend every waking second with him. You want to miss him and welcome him back home after an agonizingly long night of worrying. You want to cheer him up in court and be his lucky charm. You want to wear his initial on a chain around your neck, in Braille, because he got it for you on your birthday. 

“I know I don’t own you,” he said to you, “but I love you. And I know you. I want you to carry me close to your heart the same way I’ll always carry you close to mine.”

And his, you are. You’re no one else’s but his, and even if that sounds a bit territorial, you don’t care. You want all of it and more because it’s Matt you’re talking about, no one else. Not a stranger but the man you love so desperately it hurts sometimes.

All the girls he loved before don’t matter because he’s got you now. You forgave him more times than he probably deserved. You held on when he barely had any strength left. In return, he has shown the same kind of devotion to you time and time again. How can you ever say no to any of that when you are so in love? 

All those memories replay in sudden flashing sequences right in front of your inner eye. You love him more than anyone has ever loved him. You pulled him out of a very dark hole. You saved his life. And he saved yours. 

As he’s kneeling in front of you now, your hand in his and clutching the small, velvety box in his other, your life passes by before your eyes. Your life alone and your life together. You recount every memory in a millisecond, too shocked to even comprehend what is happening. But it is happening. 

Matt Murdock is kneeling on the floor before you, the glitter, confetti, and sticky champagne someone spilled earlier most likely leaving a stain on his good dress pants, but he remains unwavering in his decision to open that little box and show you what he’s been hiding for a while. 

It’s a diamond ring, something he probably took months to save up for. It’s small yet elegant, and it’s staring right at you. He’s taken his glasses off to try and do the same. You would marry him with paper rings, that much is true. 

Matt says your name oh-so-softly. “Will you marry me?” Four words that stop your heart and restart it at the same time. 

He sees right through you. You see right through him. Even in your worst times, you were there for each other, and now he’s asking you to spend the rest of your life with him. Together. To give him all of your days and nights and he will give you all of his in return. He is asking you the question you’ve been wondering if he would ever ask it, and he did. 

The fireworks go off in the distance, in your stomach, everywhere. The new year has rounded the corner. People are cheering and celebrating around you, but you don’t pay attention to them. 

The clock strikes midnight and with the softest smile, you say, “Yes.” You don’t need to tell him that you would do it a million times over because he knows. He knows your heartbeat, and he knows that you would never lie to him. 

He doesn’t waste time to pull you into his arms and kiss you softly, passionately, as if both of your lives depend on it. 

It’s a bit cliché, to get proposed to on New Year’s Eve. To start the new year with the man you love and a ring on your finger. But that only means that you will still be together on New Year’s Day, and all the days after that. 

Matt chose you. You chose Matt. You chose a life together that is as unpredictable as they come, but at least you have each other to hold onto. 

And he will never be just the stranger that you bumped into in front of your favorite corner café ever again. You have him now. Maybe that was your plan all along. Maybe you are the mastermind he knows that you are. None of it was accidental. 

And now, Matt Murdock is yours. Forever and always. 

[rainypebble07]

i hope you're feeling better now but i just saw your post from the other day and i sure do have Things to put in your askbox so

hello hi tell me about your writing process ! and i mean literally any part of it, literally any Thing, i'm just kind of curious because i really love what you write and my wips generally stay unfinished no matter how much i like the idea so i'm also kinda just curious how you manage to Get It Done yk?

no pressure at all i was just wondering

(Dude, I wrote too much. Sorry. i love to speak. I was excited I got an ask)

Hi! Yes! I'm feeling a little better now, still kinda sick, but so it goes. And that's so sweet of you! I'm glad you like my writing!

Writing Process? Oh boy, this is gonna be so disappointing. Most of the stories I've written come to me at random moments and over the course of a few days I'll make up this weird elaborate plot in my head until I get to the point where I'm like 'ok, this need to be a fic'.

I usually use two documents while writing something. I've got a layout (that's where I pull the crazy planning posts from) and the actual story(where I get the out-of-context stuff). I write down everything I want to happen in the layout document and add as much to it as I see fit (this can include really anything from specific conversations I want to really generic plot points) as well as block out chapters and after I'm finished with that, it usually just looks like a weirdly formatted poem or something. I never use spellcheck or anything on that either and I use such casual language, so it always looks like something I wrote while blackout drunk, but I love it nonetheless. Here's the first chapter of "Mike Wheeler's Ultimate Guide to the Undead"'s outline for example:

As you can see, it's a mess, but I love it. And somehow I got the first chapter out of this.

The point of that is pretty much it's an outline, but it's also kind of fun since it's so casual, so I've found it helps to motivate me to write new parts of the story bc I'm engaged by the strange wording I use on the outline. I also use this doc for title planning and other stuff I have to figure out beforehand. For example, I wrote the poem in Shady Business on an outline doc.

I then transfer this over to the story doc in an actual storytelling format. Most of my writing comes out of absolutely nowhere and idk what to say about it. I'll word-vomit for about ten minutes and get a page, look at it, and go 'oh hey, why isn't that horrible?'. I'm also super conversational in my writing, which helps it flow better. I always thought that made my writing hard to read, but a lot of people have actually said they like my writing style so I guess it's not that bad! I just treat it as if I'm telling the story over a cup of coffee. As for representing the character well (because they are real characters), I just try to get into their mindset as much as possible. I don't really have any specific way I do that, though. I recently had to create a fake "Am I the Asshole" post for Mike so I could try to understand his feelings on something better within myself (made it on the outline doc!).

After the initial word vomit of a chapter, I'll go back and read it over, adding or taking away what I see fit and fixing initial spelling mistakes and making sure it reads well. I don't have a beta reader (I wish I did), so I've gotta just assume it's readable and go with it. After the initial fixes, I'll read it over again just to make sure. I only fix all the spelling mistakes by the time I go to publish because I use Grammarly on the Ao3 post thing lol. By that point, it's only like 4 mistakes left anyway (and the stuff Grammarly says is incorrect but I don't care bc it sounds good and I can do what I want).

I also highlight my little outline as I go (usually in green bc byler brainrot, you can see it in the image) and it helps me visualize my progress and keep going!

But, yeah. That's pretty much the entire process and I have no better explanation than it's simply a dumpster fire of improv and weird pieces of moment I have glued together in my brain. It's arts and crafts, at the best, but somehow I pull it together and create a story!

As for motivation, most of it's four things. One, the anticipation of writing scenes I really want to. Two, telling myself I'm gonna get fun comments and reading old comments (I thrive off of positive feedback from poeple). Three, a specialized playlist for the fic. I make playlists for my stories with songs I like that fit the overall vibe and sometimes I get inspiration from them and it gives me new ideas. And four, probably the most important, I just really like writing. It's my favorite things ever to just put words on a page and make a story out of it. It's so fun and so cool and so magical and I love it.

And that's about it. The end. That's my writing process. It doesn't really make much sense, but I guess it works, so it works for me! If you're looking to improve your own completion rate, I mean, maybe try some of it, but it's really a personal preference. You've gotta do tril and error. And I've really gotta work on slowing down anyway because I can totally rush writing a fic and end up making it a lot less than it could have been if I took more time. And If you're not feeling motivated to write, don't force it. Seriously. Things like I suggested totally help me keep up with it, but what I hate more than anything is stuff I wrote when I didn't want to write. It's just... uninspired.

Okay! Thank you so much for asking that! Hopefully this long rant of nonsense (omg like my writing) answered your question! Sorry I wrote an essay!

[juicywritinghoard]

prompts to shake things up

I didn't know you wore glasses and I'm thinking normal and platonic thoughts about you right now I swear

I'm going to take over the world and no one can stop me not even y- okay well if you ask nicely I guess

you say childish like it's a bad thing but I see you eyeing that life size Pokémon plush don't kid yourself 

be honest are you crying about the commercial with the kitten in it

this marriage was supposed to be a scam but, but listen,

soooo *twirling hair and fluttering eyelashes* why does everyone think you're a freak

I know I'm your doctor and the horns growing in overnight was kind of a surprise but why do you want them removed those are sick as hell

babe. my love. song in my heart. are you purring 

okay so if you want me to rescue you from up there you have to try to come with me--okay I guess I'm picking you up

I have never been this sick before I'm sorry did I, haha this is so weird, but did I confess my love for you? f- four times? yeah? haha oh

every time you taste my cooking you just say it's amazing does it need more salt or not I swan to John

oh it's nothing it's just. you sing when you're happy and the place has been so quiet for so long, and I heard you- nevermind,

you frost cookies like you're neither left or right handed but a third other hand that you don't actually possess and I can't stand it (affectionate)

I don't think you understand how much your good morning texts legitimately keep me from rotting in bed all day 

you must be pretty down if me juggling your oranges doesn't even get a laugh out of you :( should I light them on fire? 

no I see the super powers yeah I just, I'm not sure you got them from your medication, yeah, and would you say that's a negative side effect or

you bought me a SWORD? OH MAN IM GONNA BE SO DANGEROUS 

ooh what's this potion do? coffee? that's a funny name. what happens if I press this button? humans are so fascinating this is the best I hope I never go home

you've been blinking SOS in Morse code at me for ten minutes honey this award ceremony is supposed to be honoring you 

when we kiss I feel like I'm floating, like literally gravity stopped working on me please don't let go?? also another kiss wouldn't hurt just saying 

so it was YOU who took a full bite out of that stick of butter!! please. please. why??

let's go on vacation somewhere cheesy and act like we're a couple wouldn't that be sooooo funny haha

okay so sleeping it off didn't work. let me consult my list. hypnotism, no. meditation, certainly not. well something has to work because I simply cannot be in love with them

I'm a spy. i can do unspeakable crimes under the morally bankrupt cover of night but I'm not sure I can pretend to look at real estate as a couple with you 

my love is your arm stuck in the claw machine. you were going to steal that prize for me?? oh my gosh. let me rescue you and also show you how to actually do this