#also i feel like uni would treat me even worse idk

[conqu3er]

God i really wanna start T this year, but i'm such a pussy, i dont wanna lose my toxic little shitty family ugh

[purpurussy]

.

[hanatiny]

sorry for Ranting On Main™️, I just need to get this out of my system, feel free to ignore

[matan4il]

A part of me is terrified of what will it take for most of these "anti-zionists" to realize that there has been a large rise of antisemitism, specifically in the left.

Will it be another mass shooting at a synagogue, but this time done by an anti-zionist college student? Will it be another October 7th? Or even worse?

Idk what it will take for these people to realize they're being blatantly antisemitic, evidence won't work, and I doubt every single person here can get a check from reality.

Hi Nonnie!

I'm not sure there is anything that will make them recognize this left wing antisemitism, but more importantly, I don't think anything can make them care about it. Take the Holocaust, did the Nazis need its full scale to be published, to realize that Jew hatred was on the rise in Europe at the time? No, they knew. They just didn't care. It wasn't a problem. If anything, it was a good thing.

The anti-Israel crowd has cast Jews as the ultimate evil in their world view (powerful, rich, capitalist, white, colonizers, oppressors, representatives of the west), so at this point, antisemitism doesn't bother them (except they will still call it out when it comes from white supremacists, and they think this "proves" they're not antisemitic). It's not a problem to them, it's the "right stance" against oppressors. That's why they can look at Oct 7 and justify it, dismiss its horrors, or (when called out on the double standards they're employing to do the former) deny they even happened. And it makes them feel good, they think they're on the right side of history, and that this proves their moral superiority (just like the Nazis' antisemitism boosted their sense of racial superiority).

Oct 7 was... as extreme as I hope we'll ever see the Israeli-Arab conflict get. It was the single bloodiest day for Jews since the Holocaust, but also the single bloodiest day in the conflict. I went back and forth over every event in the conflict, and I can't find a single day that was as bloody as this, not on the Israeli side, and not on the other side. And the anti-Israeli crowd still don't care, showing it's not really about human life to them, or they would.

If Oct 7 didn't get to them, nothing done to the Jews ever would. Maybe if they'd end up being victimized by this same sort of hatred and violence, maybe that would change their POV, though I still wouldn't wish that on ANYONE, and I suspect some would be able even then to employ the kind of mental gymnastics that explain why what was done to the Jews was just, while what was done to them was wrong.

And in the context of the rise in antisemitism globally, outside of Israel, if they don't feel any symapthy upon seeing the vids of Jewish students having to barricade themselves inside a uni library for almost an hour, while an angry mob bangs on the doors, chants "From the river to the sea, Palestine will be free," and the Jewish kids have to wait for the police to get them out safely, or upon learning about the homicide of a 69 years old Jewish man just because he was out demonstrating, or care about the countless vids with testimonies from Jews the world over talking about how scared they are, or stop to wonder why are there swastikas at anti-Israel rallies, then these people are too far gone. They just don't care about Jews.

What I think matters is to relentlessly call them out on their antisemitism, to make sure they never forget they're vilifying Jews (and the Jewish state), and treating Jews with complete indifference when it comes to Jewish rights, safety and lives. I believe we need to make it socially unacceptable to treat Jews this way under the guise of being anti-Israeli, just like it is socially unacceptable to say they're gonna go "death con 3 on the Jews." And I think it matters that we keep talking to the people who aren't brainwashed, who do care about Palestinians lives, care about those for real (not just as a tool to attack Jews), and at the same time they care about human lives for real, so they're capable of feeling real empathy for Jews. It matters that we remind them, that true compassion takes both sides into account, and advocates for what is best for both in this conflict. And that this IS a complex conflict, one in which there are no clear cut villains, and no easy solutions, but we have to keep striving to make it better even when it's hard.

I'm doing my best. The more of us do this, the more hope there is.

Thank you for this ask, I hope my reply somewhat helps! Have a good day and take care! xoxox

(for all of my updates and ask replies regarding Israel, click here)

[sevicia]

I 🩷 whining & bitching & moaning

yk how yesterday I was the one who ended up giving Mila the pill? well my sister's awake now and decided she was gonna do it (didn't even ask me) while I handed her treats and it took a bunch of tries too. & I don't think I would've gotten it 1st try either, but I know exactly how it goes when I wanna do something she doesn't think I'm capable of: she just doesn't let me do it. it's happened time & time again so I didn't even ask this time cause literally what's the point .....

everyone in my house constantly infantilizes me and genuinely seems to believe I can't do anything by myself. I'm going to a thing from uni about 1st year students (such as me) familiarizing themselves w/ the school campus & other introductory activities on Tuesday & my mom really anxiously told me we (her & I) should try to go to uni before that just so I'd know how to get there, when the route I have to take is literally just home -> bus stop -> metro -> get off -> walk 5 min in a straight line. I told her no, that I would be fine just getting there by myself on Tuesday and she reluctantly agreed.

+ a few days ago I overhead my dad talking about gifting me some money for some reason I'm not sure about, and my sister very seriously told him to just give it to our mom instead so she'd manage it for me, and he agreed. Her argument was that I'd just spend it too quickly which I understand cause I did that all the time when I was in highschool. Which was 3 years ago.

IDK like even when I try to do something I'm usually not capable of doing (mainly cooking), I'll ask a bunch of questions to make sure I'm doing it right to the point they get annoyed w/ me & just do it themselves like "you're too nervous just be more confident and do it already" meanwhile whenever I did things "confidently" in the past I always managed to fuck them up somehow and then get treated like I'm stupid and no one has made the connection that maybe when you constantly tell someone they're stupid while they're trying something new, they'll just stop trying .... ? because they don't want to be called stupid .... ?

It's also made me actually really adverse to try anything by myself cause I find I start thinking "someone else's gonna do it and even if I tried I'd just make it worse", but I don't feel that way when I'm home alone / away from home, it's literally just when I know I'm being judged by people who know me and are around me all the time

& when I manage to get something right I sometimes get praised but most of the time it's just "well you should've been able to do that a long time ago!" and like I know that it's true and that I'm not a dog that should get a treat for every new trick he learns but I just don't want it to be dismissed like that yk .... like just tell me "good job" or smth

I also think getting treated like a child all the time really makes my perception of myself as inherently unattractive / underisable a lot worse because I've just started to believe that everyone sees me as a kid so no one in their right mind would ever be attracted to me ykwim ? the fact that I'm relatively short doesn't help either

the way I get treated like a stupid child while also having adult expectations put on me is always so confusing, like I'm being pulled in 10 different directions and I enjoy none of them

+ I feel like even MORE of a brat for even complaining about this in the first place cause I've heard people say "man I WISH I had someone who did everything for me" and it just makes me feel horrible bc maybe I should be grateful that they care & worry about me so much and I'm just whining over nothing again

"how are you gonna survive when I'm gone ?!?!" from my mom and "you'll literally just die the second you move out" from my sister and "don't even try, it's too dangerous" from my dad and I just keep quiet because I can't even prove them wrong because they're not wrong. I CAN'T do anything by myself and I AM slow at everything (which is just me trying to avoid calling myself stupid) and I AM lazy and have no common sense.

maybe this is the reason most of my daydreams consist of me being like 30 and living on my own lol

[silberpilz]

Yo

Big fuckin Rant down here i needed a place to vent please feel free to just skip this i need to yell into the void

Ah yes btw mentions of very much not good mental health i had

Idk i can't believe the two weeks i waited at least a month for just are over. Just like that. And life just goes on and i have to work again and i hate work. I feel bored and empty. I want to create but cant manage to do more than doodles or a few words, if i even do it. Also i just know my pains will never really go away.

Ghaaahhh i'm sorry for being such a sorrowball again but idk what else to do about it. It could be way worse of course and i'm thankful it's not (yet) but man. I just want to be happy. All i could think about in my last week of vacation (in which i got sick anyway) was that i just fucking LOATHE having to work full time. I hate it so much. Why do i have to spend most of my concious day and most of my energy just to get not even a actual employees amount of money (i'm still a trainee) and i still have to do it for almost 2 further years. 2. YEARS! Why does it take so long!!! If i didnt have Abitur it would be even longer!!!!!

Ok since this is escalating anyway:

I know i tried my best in trying and failing so many times trying to get into a profession within my actual interests but damn. Did it leave a mark on me. I am exhausted. I feel like i wasted so so much time. Got to repeat 10th class 2 times, uni was trash, design college didnt want me, gardening was good but my bosses started to treat me like trash for some reason and having to scoot there during winter made me freeze before and after work in a way that would make icicles blush and i just wanted to fucking end it and it was very hard to not give up to these thoughts. Then i tried to get into my towns bookstores and one of them didnt even let me do a test internship and the second one all of a sudden had someone else who was sooooo much more better and knowledgable about literature than me i FUCKING GUESS. Then i had a minijob, trying to get into some creative and cultural field of study again but hey. Times running out. Would i even have a future with that stuff. Working on a pprtfolio would take time. I need work right now RIGHT NOW OR ELSE MY FUTURE WILL BE IN SHAMBLES FOREVER (thanks mom and dad) And now i'm here. It could be worse. My bosses are nice, the stuff i deal with is kinda interesting. But well. Its retail. And all my direct coworkers are some 40+ yo women who are way too snarky and nosy at times. All the more friendly coworkers or the ones my age are either in the forge or in another floor and they work different jobs. Like i said it could be way way worse and i'm thankful its not. But i'm just not happy. I constantly long for more. And i'm so tired all the time. As i'm starting to age into adulthood, all of this gets into my body and recently also into my nervous system.

I just want to hang out with my friends again. I just want to have fun and not worry. I want to have energy and independency. But to achieve that, i have to push through all of this. I can't give up again, sadly.

Maybe one day i can express myself more freely again, worry less, have more free time and still be able to pay rent. And my back will hurt less. And i can help others more effectively.

[beautifuldarkmind]

Idk if this’ll seem creepy but I found a post on your account that mentioned the NHS.

Does that mean you live in the UK? If so, how did you get diagnosed with BPD? (…asking for a friend)

(Sorry if this is too personal)

Not creepy at all! I'll give you the back story because it wasn't a simple diagnosis -

Yes I live in the UK and basically I've had many signs of BPD leading up to adulthood- of course you can't get diagnosed until you're over 18 as they say anything below can be contributed to 'the teenage phase'... I literally would get so angry and blow up and I had the lowest self esteem, felt really unworthy etc... my mum took me to the doctors because she couldn't deal with my anger- but my parents would always invalidate my emotions... so it got worse. I'd get angry they would say 'women don't get angry', I'd have anxiety they would tell me 'nothing is wrong' etc. Doctors blamed it on me being a 'rowdy rebellious teen' but I realise now that I felt like no one was listening to me and I would react. They sent me to therapists, I had CBT for anxiety and depression, it didn't really help because something was still wrong - this continued until I was 18...

When I turned 20, I knew something definitely wasn't right... all my friends were moving through life, going to uni, had a sense of self … I didn't have that. I felt like I was still a child? like everyone around me was moving and growing and I was stuck in this childlike state trying to find out who I was and what I was doing. I hated myself- infact resented myself and I'd self sabotage and ruin every opportunity and friendship/relationship I had. I was also impulsive I'd do things to make myself feel better such as break things or go on non stop rants, buy things I didn't really need.

I went back to my GP last year ... explained this and they said... you guess it, DEPRESSION. I told them I had gone to hospital 3 or 4 times due to impulsively harming myself, I couldn't even function and I ruined all my relationships and life. I impulsively quit jobs, I ended friendships, I pushed people that cared for me away and then felt heartbroken afterwards and couldn't understand why I kept doing that.

The last time I went to the hospital they said I needed 'trauma therapy' ...I had an extremely volatile argument with my dad and I tried to hurt myself again and was extremely suicidal and knew I wasn't safe at home. They referred me to a service called 'The listening place' I had fortnightly calls with them, but it was mainly due to me feeling suicidal it didn't really combat anything.... I finished it and went back to my GP who then said psychiatrists wouldn't see me unless I was having severe mental health symptoms such as hallucinations or I was delusional and non functional. I begged them but they said...no! I was literally thinking... I'm desperate here, all they can do is prescribe me drugs and not even tell me wtf is wrong with me. They eventually said I'd be put on some waiting list for another type of therapy, I'd had enough.

It got to the point in 2020, where I'd got so unwell I literally couldn't function... I'd cry every day and I'd self destruct over anything... everything triggered me, you name it... I'd see people I knew graduating - I'd feel worthless, I'd be like what have I even done with my life? my birthday came up in October - a month later the police nearly had to break down my door because I'd not opened it and the helpline I called had marked me as a suicide risk. I went to hospital, the lady told me to meditate and go for a walk :))))))) like that's going to solve anything.

I was so confused why everything hurt so much... why I couldn't function, why I ruined everything so I went through my insurance and went privately. I'm going to be honest, the NHS failed me because I was begging them - I'd gone to hospital many times injured and obviously unwell- they had even said I was a risk to myself but wouldn't admit me to the psych ward because they had no beds. I don't know anyone who managed to get a diagnosis through the NHS because they fob everyone off and say its depression. Therapists wont diagnose, GP's are useless and will throw meds at you and they are very reluctant to prescribe anything.

When I got my diagnosis, I was both relieved but also in shock. They had told me it was 'EUPD' or emotionally unstable personality disorder.. I'd never heard of it referred to in that term, only BPD which I knew faintly of. If you have insurance go privately, some can get plans where you pay over a few months etc. But yeah, on the NHS it seems the only way they will diagnose you is if you're over 18 and are basically an inpatient or something because they refused to diagnose me, even when they told me I needed 'DBT' or 'Trauma therapy' they wouldn't give it a name they just said it was childhood trauma lmao. It may be different in other parts of the country but all the other people I know with BPD either had to do it privately or were inpatients and got diagnosed in the psychiatric hospital. Although you may have a really good doctor who may specialise in it and can help? but yeah I had the hardest time trying to find out what was wrong with me, the NHS don't like to diagnose it and once you have got diagnosed with it.... expect to be treated VERY differently by the NHS and doctors :) therapists now refuse to see me due to my diagnosis and I get told my episodes are because I'm 'emotionally unstable'... by MEDICAL PROFESSIONALS.

Good luck and all the best, it's not an easy journey.

[blackguanabana]

FRIDAY, NOVEMBER 5TH 2021.

(Writen on Saturday 6th @ 12:42 AM)

This is how my day went:

- Had a bad night. Anxiety & overthinking hasn't been letting me sleep properly.

- Woke up early with an awful pain around the left side of my neck after sleeping for a few hours in the worst position.

- Went to a doctor's appointment. everything was fine except my cholesterol. No surprise. That has been a problem since i was a kid.

- Went to another appointment to apply for a job (This is their role. Helping others finding jobs that are available and.

- I arrived with the papers my friend told me to hand out. They told me I didn't had every document so they couldn't do a thing other than give me a list of all the documents needed.

- Went to Walgreens and bought a few things I needed.

- Headed home.

As I was about to write ''I wasn't as productive today as I wanted to be'' I realize now how much I punish myself mentally for not doing certain tasks.

I literally just went out to a doctor's appointment, drove to get an orientation for a social work job, bought things I needed, did laundry and prepared + fixed a couple of thigns from some art notes I'll be doing soon.

In my head, being productive is being super busy. Doing a lot of things at once especially house work (since I'm unemployed still and I'm mostly at home cause I'm done with uni. And by ''I'm done with uni I mean that I graduated already).

Some of these punishment and judgement and spot that I put myself in also comes from the juding coming from my own mother.

If I don't do like 20 things around my house, I basically did nothing at all. In my own head I gotta be busy and doing this and doing that AND THEN I can call it ''productivity''.

That's not even what productivity is or what it means. Reading a book and journaling can be productive. But I look at my agenda and I don't see a huge list of things I have to do, I feel bad. It feels like I'm not oding a thing at all. When I actually am.

And the fact that I'm not that mentally stable (lol) at the moment, how I'm treating myself on the inside (with this whole productivity thing) just makes everyhting worse.

This is the second time I've noticed. Now I gotta work on this part of myself while working with my anxiety.

The good news is that, though they couldn't give any info about the social work job because my documents were incomplete (thank you Egna *eye rolls*), I heard they offered baking classes.

Which is what one of the things I wanted to do since I was a child? An early teenager? Idk, but it's a thing I wanted for many years. I had an uncle that baked and he was gonna teach me how to bake, but he passed away many years ago. And nothing happened after that.

I stopped thinking about it for years and I completely forgot about it when I had to decide what I wanted to do in university. In a time when I didn't know what the fuck to do with my life.

It came back and I'm excited that they have available two spaces for new members/students. So I gotta schedule that very quickly and find the rest of the documents that I needed.

I would like to earn extra cash this way so that I can pay for my professional wrestling classes. I've already mentioned that I'm not so sure about the social work job, but I gotta know what positions they'll have for me and what they'll do with me. Because they were asking for psychology students with bachelors degree. But on the other hand, you gotta have a license for that.

Anyways, we'll see what happens. At least with the baking stuff I can turn it into a small business or find a job at a café or bakery shop. Let's pray that these manifestations come true.

The most important thing at the moment ar emy professional wrestling tainings (that I haven't start yet lol caus eI'm broke atm) and baking classes come number 02 on that spot/list.

🌱 SONG OF THE DAY 🌱

HOLY TOLEDO! - GREEN DAY

[lunavadash-creates]

Hello my Dear! Long time no see! I dropped by to say hi and ask how is my Succulent Babe doing? How are you feeling?

I have to admit that your windowsill looks amazing with all those succulents and small sculptures. Are those Buddhists monks? The more I look at it the more I feel inspired to have such a collection! It would look really good with my utensils. I love that succulent in elephant pot! I am looking forward to seeing more of your succulentarium then! I guess your room must be really cozy with all those plants and with purple walls. What shade of purple is your room?

I gladly accept your invitation to share the level 4 fluffy blanket. It’s so cold outside! ;( I would love to bury myself underneath and disappear for at least a few months. Last week was horrible. I would love to say that it was the worst for a while, but tomorrow will be even worse. I don’t remember when I’ve slept well lately and I am so tired all the time. There is so much to do that I have no time to get a break at work, not to mention having a meal. And while I really love my work and people I work with, there is ONE person who makes me scream, curse and cry at the same time. I hate this guy and I would kill him without a second thought. He is a sexist, a misogynist, an asshole and a shameless liar. Please Luna, keep your fingers crossed for me so I can handle the next two weeks.

And you are right, I have no idea what I would do without L. right now. Going for long walks with her is the last thing that keeps my nerves. Without them I would have a mental breakdown for sure. Nothing calms down like a wet nose, wagging tail and 88lbs of floof believing that their love is the cure for everything. Maybe you should consider having a dog? Or a bunny?

And ofc, you have kisses back from L.! She got her favorite treats as you asked for!

Elegant-casual clothing. You are my spirit animal!

And as for recipes.. I will be grateful for anything tbh! I am not good at cooking and I don’t even like cooking, so I would love something easy to do, preferably something that I could take as lunch to work. I try to avoid eating meat, so vegetarian options would be nice, but if you have any good recipes with meat – I won’t complain! Onigiri with tuna (my favorite!) sounds asdfghjkllove, salads, tortillas and anything with spinach too! I don’t like spicy food. And crepes. If you need more info, please don’t hesitate to ask more detailed questions.

My cousin was on a trip to Norway a few days ago and he sent me a few photos of northern lights. They were all so beautiful and breathtaking! I would love to experience it myself, especially the northern lights I saw weren’t that spectacular. Do you plan to travel somewhere in the near future?

Take care Babe! I am not sure if you started uni already, but if yes – good luck! 💕

🔪

Knifeyyyyy ;-;

I missed you so much! I was wondering when I'll see you again

I had some nice days, you know? I was productive and happy, I saw a new castle that looked absolutely amazing.

And then I started uni. And there is this one person. I hate her with passion, she is such a toxic, fake person I wish I couldn't cut her off completely from my life. And you know what? I will. As soon as I'm done with this uni I'll her everywhere. She is such a fake person.

I have toward her exactly the same feeling as you toward that guys. And rn I'm so so angry with her and her behaviour.

I'm m keeping my fingers crossed for you. Please survive this, eat and drink water. Remember your life is more important than any job, don't hurt yourself in the process, okay? Please?

If you will be a good baby I'll share more succulents when ill get them. And yes, those are tiny Buddhas!

I'm really happy you have a doggy that is there by your side and that you have a way to calm yourself. So really. Take care of yourself.

Unfortunately I can't have animal rn. But if I'll ever be able to have one I'll get bunnies. I love them.

As for cooking... In all honesty most of my dishes are with meat ;-;

Except like pasta with spinach (spinach, milk, butter, garlic and a pinch of salt). I put spinach into crepes, pasta, tortillas. I love spinach. By when it comes to easy recipes I usually buy tortillas and put inside cheese and vegetables.

Or you can try chopping veggies (carrot, onion, leak, cabbage, bamboo shots, mun/shitake mushrooms, string beans) putting them on a frying pan, adding soy sauce, veggie broth and if you have those mix of Chinese/Asian spices. It's tasty and you can add rice of rice noodles. I love that dish actually. I usually add some chilli to it but if you don't like spicy you can skip it.

I want to see northern lights. Like so so much. But rn I feel like my brain is boiling. That person at uni she makes me ugh. I just hate her.

But I hope I can travel one day. Idk when or where. But I will.

Also! Today I had first lecture about korea! It was so nice!

I'll take care of myself of you will too. Deal baby?

[rationalisms]

hi charlie. i know this is a pretty pathetic message to send to someone but do you have any tips on making friends? i have really bad social anxiety and so am really struggling with it. i was hoping you would have some tips because you've given me good advice before and seem to have an easy time getting along with people? feel free ignore this if this is a creepy or weird thing to receive. thank you and i hope you have a good weekend. x

aw dude it’s not pathetic at all :(( that’s something a lot of people struggle with and it’s ttly fine to reach out for help! ik society makes it seem like we’re just supposed to know all the rules for social stuff instinctively but this stuff is rly hard, especially once u leave the more regimented day to day of school/uni. 

unfortunately idk if i’m the best person to ask rly bc i actually don’t have an easy time getting along with ppl at all. partly bc i also have p bad anxiety around social stuff and partly bc most ppl find me strange and offputting lol. 

i’ve basically just been rly rly rly lucky that other more brave/outgoing ppl made the first move so it feels like any advice i can give is inherently phony bc i don’t follow it myself lol :(

idk what your life situation is like and obv the pandemic complicates things but i feel like it’s always easier to bond with people when there’s some pre-determined common ground already so you’re not treading completely blind. are there any hobbies you have that you think you’d have fun bonding over? art/writing, a sport, games, knitting, etc. you could see whether there’s any local groups for that and whether they’re doing online meet-ups right now. maybe not immediately meeting in person might even make it easier?  even something like a book club might be fun if you can’t think of anything specific. 

otherwise my advice would be to just... not try to Force it? like don’t go in with the expectation that the End Goal of this is to find your life long best friend and anything short of that is a failure. it’s rly easy to slip into that mindset when you’re already anxious or on edge, at least for me, but in my experience treating every social interaction like it’s a friendship audition really just makes it worse, both because you’re putting an immense amount of pressure on yourself that’ll just make everything harder and because that really easily leads to behaviour that isn’t actually conductive to that. i.e. being a yes man, coming on overly strong or pushy, becoming a doormat because you think favours will get you there quicker, etc. it’s ok if it takes a while! and even just making a casual acquaintance is an accomplishment and can help you practice your social skills. 

idk that i rly have anything useful to say i’m sorry :(( i rly hope that things are easier for you soon. sending love

[jumpthensfall]

this may sound rude and totally ignore this if u don’t wanna answer, but i just wonder what mental health issues u deal with and how u manage them? i know it’s kind of personal but you post a lot about struggling and i wanted to know how you overcome that :~)

hi anon!!!! the totally isn't rude at all don't worry!!!:)so basically it's kinda difficult to say Exactly what i struggle with AKSKEKDODKDM bc i got some like??? vague diagnoses from camhs but camhs were quite Useless and then from there my uni are also..... even MORE useless and i don't really know where to go from here bc i'm too scared to ask for More JAKSEKKGKRFKKF but the things that camhs told me i have were social anxiety disorder,, panic disorder,, depression + a restrictive ed that i'm trying to recover from (and doing actually really well with atm which is irrelevant but also i'm actually quite proud of myself bc i'm at a point i never ever thought i'd get to so i needed to say it somewhere AJDJSJSJ) :) but yes those are vague things,,, although i defo have symptoms and have noticed a lot of patterns also that i haven't ever spoken to a professional about so basically although i know i have those things..... i simultaneously have No Idea What Is Going On In My Brain And Would Like To Know Now Please KAKDKRKGKEKD

but anyway..... that was super rambly i'm sorry AKDKDKFKD but as for dealing with things!!!! i don't think i can give too much advice as i obviously still struggle a lot but some vague and general things that help me when i'm feeling especially bad just generally like??? not expecting too much of myself????? i feel like personally when i'm feeling Bad™ i make myself feel extra worse when i can't make myself do thingsajsirkfkfk and it takes a bit of practice but convincing urself that you're allowed to take it easy is helpful for me sometimes,,,, like treating mental illness symptoms as if they were physical ones!!

also remember that crying is good,,,, can make u feel a lot better,,,, 10/10,,,,,,, also very specifically to do with my anxiety / times when i'm just feeling supersuper stressed and overwhelmed :: this might sound weird but something that can make me feel so much better and at least just make my head a tiny bit clearer is like????? talking out everything that you're stressed/anxious about???? i do this ALL THE TIME like out loud to myself AKDJFJDJDJ and it's so weirdly helpful,,, like i'll go through everything i'm anxious about in my head and force myself to unpick each of them logically so that i can come to the conclusion of 'see! u don't actually logically need to be anxious about that!' or like 'see! out of the like 10 things u just listed, u are actually only Really that scared for one of them!'

idk if that made any sense at all JAKDKEKFLEFKRKEL but that is some supersuper vague stuff from the top of my head ANDKDKFKGKGK IM REALLY SORRY THOSE WERE SUCH AWFUL AND GENERIC ANSWERS and i'd give more but i am still Not The Best at coping,,,, i'll mayhaps update this in the future if i get any better :))

[studylustre]

I just broke up with my boyfriend and even though it was a completely mutual break-up & definitely the right situation, I’m still really sad about it :( I loved him a lot and it’s hard knowing he’s gone from my life now. do you have any tips for coping with the sadness?

ooof i’ve been getting a lot of asks from heartbroken anons lately!! we rly be going through it huh 😔✊🏼 but listen, as someone who has been in a similar-ish situation: trust me, even though it sucks and you feel like it’ll be forever until you can pick yourself back up and feel like yourself again and not just some empty, half version of you, it will pass - and sooner than you think. here’s what i did to pick myself back up:

v e n t. seriously. bottling it all up is the worst thing you could do - with things like this, keeping it to yourself makes the whole process so much worse + more difficult to get through. talk to your friends (it’s what they’re here for and i guarantee they would be more than happy to listen if you need them!), journal (if you don’t have one already, GET ONE. journalling is a lifesaving habit), write letters + then just throw them away or something. whatever it is you need to get it out of your system, DO IT. just don’t keep it to yourself. i like to think of situations like this as a toxin of sorts - you gotta spit it all out to really get it out of your system and be cleansed of it all

exercise. idk about you, but when i’m stressed or down in any way, exercise is an incredible outlet - i get to work out all my frustrations and it feels!! amazing!! honestly, there’s nothing better than punching out your stress and sadness (i highly recommend boxing/hiit classes when you’re sad or stressed). the post-workout high is also great for your mood 🙌🏼

give yourself a deadline. personally speaking, this has been a v good and effective method of managing my emotions and overcoming them. i feel like when you don’t set yourself a deadline to pick yourself up by, it’s really easy to fall into the trap of being down for a long, long time. so, i give myself 2 days to actively wallow and be fully + intensely sad with no pretences. after that, i tell myself i have to pick myself back up, put on a brave face and just try my best to get over it - and it always works. i think it’s a mindset thing, but it genuinely has never failed me and i’ve actually bounced back the best (and fastest) with this method. to give examples: i did this after i was devastated about underperforming on my as levels - this prompted me to create my studyblr, which has grown to the side gig it is now, in addition to helping me get the grades i needed for the uni i wanted to go to as well as landing me my current job. another example: i did this after things ended with the guy i was seeing - i threw myself into my work to pull myself together, and 2 weeks into my internship, i’ve been told by my superiors that i’m smashing it, they’ve signed off on my idea for an initiative and i’m leading 2 company wide campaigns. it. works. but that being said...

be kind to yourself. it’s okay to let yourself feel + mourn the loss of the relationship. don’t berate yourself for being down, bc it’s entirely natural to be down after saying goodbye to someone you care so much about. be extra gentle + patient with yourself whilst you heal, and treat yourself the way you would a friend/loved one. take yourself out on dates, do things that make you happy + excite you, buy that thing you’ve been eyeing for a while. you deserve it.

[marxsgrandson]

“You’re not Russian, you’re just American with some Russian blood”- my Israeli PS professor (who is neither Russian nor American nor knows anything about me)

Long post ahead: read it if you’d like but mostly just hoping there’s someone else who can relate to the feelings I’m about to express. So here goes:

Had an unbelievably shitty day today.

I’m in this one political science class. It always ends up somehow ruining my mood. It’s the one with the shitty German men who confronted me in a group after class accusing me of being uncritical towards the Soviet Union, being an antisemite (lol these aryan guys were calling me an antisemite. Like they’re confirmed non-Jewish) and being a dumbass for not idk sucking Gorbachev’s dick personally would be the next leap there. Idk if I posted that here, but it’s necessary context.

Anyways today we were talking about Russia’s motive in x place and just jumping around to every unrelated topic about something about Russia because our class always gets sidetracked and never finishes the lesson we were supposed to do. And of course the Europeans were being pieces of shit.

And the prof said something like “I wish we had Russians in the class to offer maybe a Russian perspective too... like gosh that would be nice. Do we have any Russians?” And I sort of tentatively raised my hand half way because I’m half Russian and when she was looking around the room and didn’t see me, I said “I’m half Russian and this is actually something I heard and talked a lot about growing up, I could take a try at it”

“You’re not Russian, you’re just American with a little Russian blood” she said, dismissing me entirely as the class laughed like it was the funniest thing they’ve ever heard. I now realize what it means when people say they feel stung. I was paralyzed by those words and I don’t really know why. What makes it hurt more is that starting two seconds later she called on a series of five German douchebags to try and explain Russia’s motives and says “huh that’s an interesting idea” after each of them say something painfully obviously wrong. And I felt frozen.

If given the chance to unfreeze myself, I wish I said what I was feeling but didn’t have words for: “Hey. That’s not true. Russian was the language I said my first words in. It’s the language of my childhood and my soul. It connected me to something I felt distant from during the school day. I taught myself to read this language as soon as my mom taught me the alphabet as a little kid. I went to Russian school on the weekends when I was young. I worked hard to keep up this language even though I went through shit from my peers for it. I was the only speaker of this language I knew that was my age after the age of 10. The only other time I’d hear it was when my mom criticized me, wanted to manipulate me (because I told her she sounded sweeter in Russian so she used that to her advantage in making my life hell) bc my brother stopped speaking at a young age.

The only reason I have this connection is because I’ve never worked harder for anything else in my life. I took years of Russian lit courses (in Russian) at the local uni when I was in high school. Until then I’d only done math and reading (just for fun not for school) in Russian. Having learning and sight disabilities and being expected to keep up with both college and high school class and workloads was overwhelming at times. Like I was 14, this wasn’t an “easy A” as my friends joked, it was a college level literature course. But I loved it like nothing else. It was an oasis of peace during my adolesence just getting to hear my dearest language spoken by both native speakers and those who adopted it just because of their love for it. It was the first time I realized that this aspect of me isn’t shameful. Plus, the college kids treated me like I was such a hotshot because I grew up speaking the language and I was like a tiny 14 year old in a russia Olympic jacket and a bowl cut so that made my life. Just getting to be around places where for once, I understood everything that was being said in the exact emotion it was intended, having my cultural touchstones be the norm and that I got to interact with instantly more people in this language was really special.

Maybe what pissed me off so much is not only that I think it’s wrong, but that I think she’s right. My experience is different from a Russian experience, which is why I never claimed to be Russian even when I was the most Russian person in that classroom. My experience of being Russian (Jewish) (Italian)American is as much a story of love and connection as it is of shame and disconnection. It is the story of pain feeling inadequate to everyone, always. When I was six, kids were already refusing to play with me because their parents told them I was a spy or an enemy (which wtf who parents their kid like that) just because I talked about visiting my family in the summer (which is a normal thing to do) and gd forbid they live in RUSSIA. The bullshit hasn’t stopped since. My entire childhood, my mom was vigilant about who I was allowed to tell about being Russian because of it. I thought Russian a really important language to people here. I thought they cared about us. I thought someone else who didn’t have to care about us, fucking cared about us Russian Jews. How can a fellow Jew, an academic, not understand the inherent pluralism of Jewish and Russian experiences when she’s lived in this country surrounded by Russian Jews her whole life?

And I get it. I’m not technically Russian. I don’t have a Russian passport. I didn’t grow up in Russia and that still means there’s always someone more qualified to answer certain questions. But I didn’t think it was going to be some goyische fucking German. Cuz at least I saw saturated with these types of discussions about Russian politics, not being allowed to voice my opinion bc these are Russian jewish middle aged and older people lol kids don’t have valid opinions to them, but listening intently since infancy. I watched Russian news and tv shows (we didn’t have money for both English and Russian language tv so my mom chose the Russian tv channels) on the rare occasion I sat in front of the tv. I hung around Russian speakers more than English speakers (of my parent’s age and older) for most of my childhood until this year. And it’s not just the language, it’s the culture too. It’s the fact that no one around me shared these cultural touchstones growing up. and I didn’t share their American ones even though I grew up in the US.

But trips to Russia didn’t make me feel understood in the ways I craved it would. My family always commented on how amazingly I spoke Russian «просто без акцента!» (without an accent) *insert kisses from relatives you don’t even know who they are but they know everything about you* so I was always kind of aware that I couldn’t seamlessly fit in there either. Especially when in my mom’s small town, children who played with me had literally never seen someone with my color of skin and told me I looked “dirty” which catalyzed my whole washing my hands till my arms got dry and peeled and being frightened that I wasn’t getting “cleaner” and then getting diagnosed with my second subset of OCD at the age of seven. I had so many fond memories of my mom’s hometown. So much nostalgia. But I also have memories which pain me, like the many times I was chased out of stores or once in a doctor’s office because the person assumed I was Roma because of my appearance (like I said, small town). Things got even worse when the school I went to summer camp/summer classes in my mom’s hometown found out I was JEWISH. Oof. My mom convinced me that I was betraying my culture and my ancestors and alienating myself from my grandmother when I came out to her at 11, when I cut my hair after three years of her daily verbal harassment in my mother tongue (she knew it hurts more like that). She said if I wanted to continue “on this path” I would lose all connection to Russia.... “and you don’t want that, do you?” Suffice it to say, I got the message pretty young that I don’t belong in Russia either.

My whole life I’ve been translating half of my world to the other half of my world. And within each of these worlds I must translate my contexts many fold times more. (My Babushka still doesn’t know why I’m putting “poison” in my body for what she sees as a character flaw because she just doesn’t have the context for what ADHD is and the way I was taught to translate it in Russian is «дефицит внимание» or “deficit of attention/carefulness” which as far as she’s concerned is just an American invention for what could really be solved if I just sat more still.) And this has made my world so much richer to be lucky enough to have two native languages in which I learned how to express myself and gave me two whole realms through which to intimately understand the world and all of its nuances. You gain a family when you speak a language. It’s unlike anything else! It was even more special that I got to add Arabic at 12 and now Hebrew. I’m so lucky. But an inherent downside of being taught world views that conflict with each other in some very fundamental ways is really hard when you’re autistic and have ADHD because you have to juggle not just one set of social cues and norms, but two (or more, shout out to the multilinguals from childhood). It’s hard but it’s important and I’m so lucky that this was my birthright. I just wish people would take two seconds to try and understand. Or at least think about if something they said might make someone else feel like this, especially if they’re jewish. Like to ya it’s not a new thing to be torn in many directions. Even here where it’s the dominant culture, I expected her as someone who lives here and is an academic, she’d be better.

[selfdeprecating-narcissist]

This is late, but i answered these questions at the end of 2018 so wanted to do it again for 2019

what did you learn about yourself this year? How i am destined for a life of depression and disappointment bcos my morals and mindset will never align with our capitalist, racist, sexist, homophobic society and don't see how i will ever feel fulfilled in a job but we have to make money to survive so... and how crucial it is to be a feminist fucking killjoy and spread the feminist queer agenda, but how I'm way too shy to actually speak up on the spot almost always lol best moment of the year? Idk.. like time spent in nature?? I feel like looking back all my happiest moment this year were when i was surrounded by plants. Also my birthday was really nice but i was too drunk to really remember a lot of the evening worst moment of the year? Moving to Mark's, finishing my masters, shit with ex what was the biggest change you experienced this year? moving out of my house i lived in for like 10 years (still not really processed that that isn't my home anymore?), spending some time living at my dad's again for the first time in 10 years (not exactly desirable) best song of the year? I really loved gone by charli xcx & Christine & the queens best album of the year? It didn't come out in 2019, but BY FAR my most listened to were camp cope's 2 albums, I'm OBSESSED what’s one thing that happened this year that you want to change? Not move, not have my ex be a suicidal low key alcoholic, not finish my masters bcos i miss it so much, not have stayed in my shitty retail job for so long bcos it was honestly so shit best book/book series of the year? Against Memoir by michelle tea was amaaziiinggg. I still haven't read a fiction book in THE LONGEST time, I've read some nice poetry? And read so so so much increbidle feminist theory, favs are probz an archive of feelings, and depression a public feeling both by ann cvetcovich, the cultural politics of emotion by sara ahmed, whipping girl and excluded both by julia serano, gut feminism by elizabeth wilson, sister outsider by audre lorde and any essay i read by ulrika dahl best television series? accidentally got hooked on love island in the summer oops. Tuca and bertie was good, last series of broad city wasn't as good as the others but great way to end it, THAT SERIES OF OITNB WAS AMAZE, idk i haven't had much time for tv or got really into anything how was your love life this year? um, so i was with jay all year until he moved back to america in the middle of September... it was um.. interesting? eventful, stressful, but had its nice parts too?? there wasn't much sex, and when there was he was mostly drunk and forceful which wasn't nice, but he also had a lot of dysphoria and a lot of reliance on and problems with alcohol, ummm he got on with all my friends and family, that always felt very easy and natural, but there were so many communication issues, he wouldn't be open with me about his mental health, i felt obliged to stay with him bcos he didn't really have anyone else in the whole bloody country, i felt a lot more like i was responsible for him and looking after him. Since he moved back i guess I've just spent time reflecting and healing? what made you cry the most this year? I probably cried maybe like 5 times? Idk i don't cry bcos i don't go to therapy anymore ha biggest regret of the year? Maybe not being confrontational enough with jay about issues but also i always knew he was gonna move back to america so i thought it was more hassle than it was worth bcos like it always had an expiry date? And i guess i regret not making better friends with other people on my course bcos out of people on my course, i only really saw jay outside of uni best movie of the year? It chapter 2 maybe? Or frozen 2 😂 favourite place you travelled this year? Idk that i went anywhere new...but best trip was Edinburgh did you make any new friends? Linden & Dean from the theatre i work(ed) at, i actually love them, they're fab did you learn anything about your sexuality this year? maybe i could be with a cis guy??? Idk. I don't think i want to be. And i felt and still feel really uncomfortable calling jay my (ex) boyfriend bcos it's read as a straight relationship and I'm often read as straight but i just want to be like I'M SUPER QUEER BTW but then is that invalidating his gender maybe idk???? Against memoir had a good but kind of problematic essay in it on dating trans men as a queer woman bcos like your relationship inherently is not straight and is inherently queer but you're read as straight and it's uncomfortable and confusing and not something you ever really have the space to talk about and not something people really understand. And a few of the people I've dated or had a thing for have since come out as trans men or non binary and like why am i never attracted to binary 'normal' people, and am i fetishising othered genders? It's complicated init. what are some hobbies that you developed? I sort of learnt how to crochet but I'm not very good what surprised you the most this year? how unhappy people can be who appear so fine from the outside, how well i can tolerate people having a breakdown and trying to hurt/maybe wanting to kill themselves... nice. do you look different from the beginning of the year? more prominent frown lines. Worse hair bcos the fucking shower broke so I've spent 3 months only washing it with a jug how did this year treat you in general? Ups and downs. Mostly happy to absorb myself in knowledge and learning. Now stuck in another boring arse job bcos how does one make any money out of non commerical art and feminist academia!? what message would you give yourself at the beginning of the year? watch out, look after yourself, love your support system has your fashion style changed this year? I bought the best 2 cat jumpers and i love them dearly and wear them a lot one of the best meals you’ve had this year? A trip to blacks burgers with massive flip pot milkshakes i went to with joe stands out who has made the biggest impact in your life this year? Jay what’s one thing that you hope will continue next year? I need to stay in academic feminist circles, I've been out of uni for nearly 5 months now (oh fuck) and feel so deflated again bcos it's just so irrelevant to the real world... but it's not bcos it's all this theory about how much the real world sucks, but what i mean is like it's impossible to change anything and it's really disheartening. Like someone wrote into work complaining about the lack of diversity in the collection, and someone else wrote about how the talk on fanny eaton wasn't marketed towards the afro carribean community at all, and part of my job is to respond to emails and i wanted to be like YAAASS LET ME GUSH ALL OVER HOW RIGHT U ARE AND HOW SHIT INSTITUTIONS ARE but like, I'm speaking on behalf of these institutions and have to make this basic formulaic bullshit response and it's HORRENDOUS

[nikatyler]

*gasp* a replies post! A long replies post! A long replies post where I overshare again! *o* Yeah I kinda missed doing these. I’m now at home, but won’t be for much longer. First, I’m going to meet some of my new classmates on Friday and I’ll spend the whole weekend with them! We’re going somewhere...well I don’t even know where that is, just that it’s in nature and I’ve never been there before! Thank gods we’re meeting at the main station in Prague, or else I wouldn’t get there myself. Then on Moday, I have to go to my uni, and then once more on Wednesday I think? And on Wednesday, I’ll have to wake up at 4 am. my LiFe Is SoOoOOOoO HaRd oH mY gOd. No, I’ll be fine.

And a month from now, I’ll be moving to my dorm. That’s some crazy stuff. I can’t believe it’s happening. Last week, my dad actually took me to Prague and we went to see where it is. The location reminds me a lot of my home, but I won’t tell you what exactly that is because no one needs to know that. Anyway, school starts in October. I’m actually looking forward to studying, but the “living alone in a big city with people I’ve never seen before” part is scary. D: I’ll give you updates.

Anyway, today was a weird day. First, I sat alone by the lake when these two guys came and talked to me (I didn’t mind that actually, they were kinda nice), then when I got up and said I had to go home, one of them complimented my legs...which would’ve been really nice but then he basically implied he’d go to bed with me...and like literally five minutes ago he said he had a girlfriend...basically men are scary. Then later, mum and I went grocery shopping and I saw my middle school crush with his girlfriend...and decided that his girlfriend is cute, way cuter than him actually...bisexual culture I guess, crushing on your middle school crush’s girlfriend lmao. Then we went to pay for our groceries and the cashier...was my childhood friend who also happened to be my first crush and also my last crush and these days I’m wondering if I’m really crushing on him or if I’m just holding onto him because I don’t know any better. Long story but if you ever feel like I have a thing for childhood friends to lovers trope, maybe blame him.

Wow. Oversharing much? Let’s get to those replies then, before I tell you what colour my underwear is or something.

Also!! Stream Lover. You won’t regret it.

volcanopasta replied to your photoset “@ ea guess what we still don’t have in ts4”

I miss spooning

I feel like that’s one of those little things half of the community misses. ;-;

simlishprincess replied to your photoset “MAGNOLIA???”

she’s morphing

She’s broken like this really often and it scares me :D

tiny-tany-thaanos replied to your photoset “Vanessa: “So do you forgive me?” Gwyneth: “Of course I do. I must...”

Lol, a bpr founder telling thez plan no more children, they are so funny

These sims have no clue what I have in store

And just you wait for gen 2

Just you wait

tiny-tany-thaanos replied to your photoset “There it is. Wonder what she could use the computer for…;) (no, I...”

Well I can`t say this is surprisingXD

Yeah...do most people go for purple? At least most bpr people I follow/followed went for this colour :D I also wanted to do this thing where the founder chooses the pink person, but the heir is purple. Idk why, I just wanted it to be like that haha

tiny-tany-thaanos replied to your photoset “Uhh oh hi again. You guys are seeing this right after the last post,...”

Jeez, Vanessa looks like that liquid Terminaor from Terninator 2.Funnily enough he was posing as a police officerXD

Lol I have no idea what you’re talking about because I’m bad at watching iconic movies (read as: I haven’t watched any of the movies that people think everyone has watched :’D) but I’ll believe you lmao

dandylion240  replied to your photoset “I really can’t justify this, can I? Listen, I have to stay true to my...”

Sometimes the aliens won't let you go even if you want to.

Oh you’re right

create-a-sim replied to your photoset “She traded her policeman hat for a fishnet top. Fashion, you know.”

me as a policeman

Saaaame

tiny-tany-thaanos replied to your photoset “You know how I said I couldn’t justify this? Well…Alexa play Oops I...”

Yeah, make Roxanne that purple sibling/s

Careful what you wish for 👀

dandylion240 replied to your post “The power of what sharing a worry with someone can do amazes me, as a...”

Awe I'm glad you didn't delete without telling anyone. You would have been missed. But you're not the only one who thinks about doing that though.

I love seeing you on my dash ❤️

1o8percent replied to your post “The power of what sharing a worry with someone can do amazes me, as a...”

I’m glad that sharing your worries was able to help you. Simblr can be overwhelming and well life in general can be too. It’s nice to have someone to let it out to. I’m glad you’re still around!

♥♥♥

Thank you guys so much. This happens to me from time to time, but it’s never been this bad.

desira-sims replied to your post “Random thoughts and ideas: NSB, BC and my hair (again)”

I’m slowly working through the sentence starters too. I didn’t realize quite how difficult some of them would be. Lol

Same! I might incorporate one of them into my yellow gen because it would fit there perfectly. God I’m really going to milk this one awful awful event for angst huh. That will be frowned upon. As for the other...I have an idea for it but it doesn’t fit the og Raleb timeline at all (it was for them) and I want it to be canon...like I kinda just don’t want to call it an AU, but I guess I’ll have to.

aiseinei replied to your photoset “Eden: “Ughhh oh my god my life is soooo hard!”

I would be too if I was stuck staring pink in the mirror for the rest of my life �� no very cute!

Oof same haha. One of the reasons why I was hesitant about starting BPR was the pink :D

And then I went and made my founder marry a pink sim and have four pink children with her, because that makes sense. I love making myself suffer, yay!

Thank you, btw!

medleymisty replied to your post “I'm not saying I want to re-read my entire NSB but...I kinda do. Will...”

*hugs* We're our own worst critics. I used to cringe at my old stuff too, but really it was decent. I might have learned more since then, but it was still good. I'm glad you can see the good in yours. :)

I’m definitely not as hard at my younger self anymore. I went and read some of my stories written when I was 13-14, and I tried to look at it that way. They weren’t perfect, but maybe they were good for a child of that age. I mean, I always got good grades on my writing homework, and my teachers have always liked how I worked with words, so...yeah, it’s not perfect, but I’m not going to have perfectly fleshed out characters and storylines when I have barely even understood that the world isn’t just black and white, good and evil. There are shades inbetween.

That got deep again but I have a lot of feelings about this and I’m sorry to my younger writer self for how I’ve treated her. Keep going, kid.

xiapxls replied to your post “Well, of course my bad wifi had to ruin everything. I guess I will go...”

Me! Whenever I come across a new blog I'm interested in I always read everything before I hit follow

whysimstho replied to your post “Well, of course my bad wifi had to ruin everything. I guess I will go...”

It was how I found your blog actually!

yamekamerainbows27 replied to your post “Well, of course my bad wifi had to ruin everything. I guess I will go...”

I have! ✋✋

elisabettasims replied to your post “Well, of course my bad wifi had to ruin everything. I guess I will go...”

I feel like I read over 90% of it?

dandylion240 replied to your post “Well, of course my bad wifi had to ruin everything. I guess I will go...”

Me. Was in love with Ross since he was born in game. He was such a lil cutie!!

desira-sims replied to your post “Well, of course my bad wifi had to ruin everything. I guess I will go...”

Me! Came across a Ross and Caleb post and went back to the beginning to read it all.

1o8percent replied to your post “Well, of course my bad wifi had to ruin everything. I guess I will go...”

I have ��

Wooow there’s a lot of you. And you stuck with me through the bad and the worse, through all the dumb ideas I got...thank you. Seriously, thank you. There’s more in store, I promise.

You’ll want to punch me in the face eventually, I’m just saying.

Speaking of punching someone in the face, yesterday I was waiting for my hair to dry and I thought hmm, let’s go read gen 2 of my NSB. And...I knew Ross was an idiot when he was young, but I forgot he was that bad. I’m glad none of us accepted it and we only collectively forgave him when he got his crap together. Yay. Also yay we didn’t cancel him because cancel culture is disgusting, people can learn from their mistakes.

I’m going off topic again. That happens when I’m in a good mood.

elisabettasims replied to your post “Let's play a game, "how many more curly maxis match hair can I...”

It's true, there is never enough.

dandylion240 replied to your post “Let's play a game, "how many more curly maxis match hair can I...”

There is never enough

Glad we’re on the same page haha

tiny-tany-thaanos replied to your post “��”

Yes, tumblr finally stopped bullying me and send my ask!

Yay tumblr, it got its crap together for once!

No, jokes aside, if you ever send me an ask and I don’t respond, feel free to send it again. I think I got better at answering my asks fast, so you can definitely tell by that. Also, if I answer everyone else’s and not yours...that’s also a sign because I hardly ever keep asks private (unless I’ve been asked to do so, then I’ll always respect your wish!)

tiny-tany-thaanos replied to your photo “I have to catch a bus in like ten minutes but here’s what I’ve been...”

This hairstyle suits Ross!

It kinda really does?? It was also the closest I could get to his ts4 one haha.

toxoplasmajuice replied to your photoset “Contestant number seven has arrived! Talia: “Is everything alright?...”

god yeah as an experienced bc player i feel that, introductions take SO long and get SO annoying

I had an “ok I’m never doing this again” moment with literally every contestant because 1) it was taking forever and 2) making ten different and yet still entertaining dialogues was hard

And I write a lot so you’d say that would be easy for me, but nope :’D

doka-chan replied to your post “I don't know how many of you are interested in my book...”

Book recommendations are always a plus. Thank you ! :)

I like them too! Not only because, well, I get a book recommendation, but also because I’m always curious about what people read haha.

vintageplumbobs replied to your post “Just queued episode 2 of the BC and one of the posts got flagged…wanna...”

Not all of us have time for breakfast! I can’t be looking at that in the staff kitchen! People will riot! ����

Oh that’s right, forgive me tumblr, I have sinned

desira-sims replied to your post “But I’ve never told you that before.” Caleb and Ross, please? ��”

That is the sweetest thing ever. ������

dandylion240 replied to your post “But I’ve never told you that before.” Caleb and Ross, please? ��”

I love it ❤️

Thank you guys ;-; ♥ I loved writing this so much. It gave me that nice warm feeling inside, you know what I mean? They make me so happy! ;-;

wcif a vampire best friend that would eventually end up marrying me?

dandylion240 replied to your post “Just queued episode 2 of the BC and one of the posts got flagged…wanna...”

Every single post of Emerson bc was flagged and they weren’t nsfw either mostly

Yeah, this is so weird...I know people say it happens when the picture has a lot of “skintone” coloured pixels...but that’s not always the case with my flagged posts??

Also (I’ll never shut up about this)...why is there a female-presenting nipples rule when it clearly can’t ever tell female and male nipples apart? I’m just saying. And yes I get it, for AI it sure has to be difficult to tell such things apart but in my opinion that’s exactly why they should get rid of it and only incorporate it when it can tell it apart. Actually, hold on, nope. The nipple rule is stupid no matter what gender the nipple is.

And I’ve just used the word nipple more times than ever before in my nineteen-something years long life.

desira-sims replied to your photoset “Some more pictures of Aretha ♥”

She's so pretty

Thank you! ♥ I’m happy with how she turned out.

vintageplumbobs replied to your photoset “I did not forget about those townie makeovers! @epicvictoria suggested...”

That style really suits her. But then...maybe I’m biased...

I think it suits her way better than her original outfits too, but same, I might be biased...vintage/retro aesthetic is my jam.

tiny-tany-thaanos replied to your photoset “How to tell which characters are my favourite? Well, they probably...”

Looking good!

omiscanking replied to your photoset “How to tell which characters are my favourite? Well, they probably...”

I'm scrEAMINGGGG

Haha thank you! I hope it’s a good kind of screaming :D

toxoplasmajuice replied to your post “Thoughts?”

screenshots are cool and all but i say if you wanna rely more on text then go for it! especially if you've figured out that taking all those screenshots is an obstacle for you - do what works best for you, you know?

doka-chan replied to your post “Thoughts?”

For me a story is up to its writer. I don't mind only one picture with a huge text, or the contrary a lot of picture with little to no text. As long as we got attached to the characters, it's not important, as long as it's progressing and understandable.

dandylion240 replied to your post “Thoughts?”

I don’t mind reading a lot of text. Pics are always second to the story to me.

desira-sims replied to your post “Thoughts?”

I sort of think there should be a balance. No, not everything needs to be shown as a ss, but it should be more than one photo for a wall of text.

Thank you for your feedback! I think it would be no more than one Word page of text. Which is a lot still but I think that’s the maximum I’d go for. And I mean, I’d show all the important moments. It’s just, I guess I don’t need ten different pictures of the same conversation when these people are just standing next to each other. And it doesn’t need to be split into ten different posts either.

I’ll figure it out, don’t worry.

deathflowertea replied to your photoset “the softest bean �� alternate, boring caption: So I finally decided to...”

TS4 looks good on her! ��

tiny-tany-thaanos replied to your photoset “the softest bean �� alternate, boring caption: So I finally decided to...”

Cute!

alfalfalegacy replied to your photoset “the softest bean �� alternate, boring caption: So I finally decided to...”

I love her!!

Thank you guys! I really like how she turned out too.

tiny-tany-thaanos replied to your post “I'm thinking of starting something like "random facts about..." tags...”

I do love when people talk about their characters and stories! It makes OCs more real and all the small details are just adorable!

Me too. I want to know all the details. Tell me how you came up with this or that. Tell me what inspired you to do this. Tell me which song you associate with them. Tell me little things like what shower gel they’re using. I JUST LOVE OCS OKAY

toxoplasmajuice replied to your photo “Nicky: “This is a tragedy. Can I burn my picture before anyone sees...”

me whenever i finish a drawing

big relatable mood

create-a-sim replied to your post “list 5 things that make you happy, then put this in the ask box for...”

I love good lyrics as well ;)

I’ve recently found a lot of appreciation for lyrics that seem simple, but then you get into them or read some behind the scenes facts and realize they’re not as simple as they might seem. Then I feel like the person who wrote it is a genius.

ineptbubbles replied to your photoset “Could I ever get bored of her? Nope.  Could I ever get bored of making...”

Omgosh I love that shirt!!

Me toooo and I need one irl ;-; But I mean, I’ve told my sister so many times this week, maybe when my birthday comes around in December, she’ll remember and she’ll tell my parents I want it? :D I mean I could just ask them for that myself but I just know I’d be embarrassed for some reason.

mlpsimmer replied to your photoset “Roxanne: “Dad, what are you doing here?! You told me you were supposed...”

Your sims are gorgeous!

Thank you so muuuuch! ♥

desira-sims replied to your post “Fluff sentence starter 16. “Do you think the moon is jealous of how...”

These two. �� My heart. I just love them.

dandylion240 replied to your post “Fluff sentence starter 16. “Do you think the moon is jealous of how...”

I love this thank you ❤️

Same. They borrowed my heart, said they’d give it back and then ran away with it and I never saw it again. smh guys, stealing isn’t nice

And no, thank YOU for making me write this ♥

mlpsimmer replied to your post “Tumblr……..your protect-kids-from-seeing-nipples algorithm still isn’t...”

It happened to one of my drafts, which was never published. They were fully dressed, too! It's a little annoying.

Yeah, I just talked about this above in a reply to an older comment. It’s...ugh tumblr, what is u doing

[luckycheesefoodie321]

I have no idea where I was going with this when I started it but whatever, I forgot so imma post it anyhow...(loooong post)

So like I blasted through Healer and since I no longer have exams and am on my uni holidays for the year, I ain’t even taking the time to goddamn breathe bc I started a new Asian drama - Accidentally In Love (C drama) and I got stuff to say!!! (Spoilers)

So first of all...how old are these kids and by “college” do they mean university or high school bc they be drinking and driving and shit but then there are scenes where they’re in uniform?? And have high school like classes and desk mates are a thing??? Idk what’s the legal age for drinking and driving in China??? Bc I keep thinking these literal children (ok teenagers at best) are ordering wine and getting drunk but then there’s a scene where they’re sitting at low tables in an art room of this supposedly prestigious school whacking at some A4 paper with brushes and blue paint and I’m like ????? What is this class meant to be???? Kindergarten arts and crafts????

Edit: pretty sure it’s high school but the drinking is not explained???

But anyway rant over, basic premise: Chen QingQing gots da money and is the rebellious rich girl who doesn’t wanna get married and find out about her parents (one deceased, one missing) and enrols at Ming De College...against the wishes of her grandfather who has people chase after her...along the way she gets hooked into some drama with Si Tu Feng, idol and pop star, who similarly is trying to escape his duties to attend the wedding of his dad whom he is pissed at but then collided with QingQing, decides he’s gonna go anyway (after accidentally stealing a kiss off her) declares him and QingQing engaged (the amount of times I demanded she smack upside the head with the chicken drumstick she was holding in her hand ohohohohoho) which would start rumours and crap about their supposed relationship...they then go on to meet at Ming De College and various circumstances keep pushing them together...

Basically it’s very Meteor Garden/Boys Over Flowers except the girl is actually rich and hiding it, the boy isn’t actually that bad as far as demanding chaebols go...

there was some angsty trash in the first ep where he was using QingQing to spite his dad but idk mostly all he does now is chill with her, banter with her, ignore her, or help her out...after the adequate and expected “declaration of hatred and brief avoidance of the other at the start of this drama” period...

The girl fell in love pretty quickly and first...I mean I love me a boy falls first story but this is ok bc it’s a simmering slow burn...he’s pretty much totally into her but keeps denying it...

He’s actually pretty gentle and gentleman

The angry girl antagonist is actually a relevant figure in his life and he treats her well

SO, I’m only up to Ep 15 the ship brewing nicely, as well as a side ship I am attending to with careful consideration, and a ship that is sinking before it even began...

IM DONE AND IM MAD THEY DONE MAH HOMIE BRO GU NAN XI DIRTY!!! GU NAN XI WAS THE ULTIMATE FRIGGEN WINGMAN AND IM PISSSSEDDD!!!

As is per the usual: two bros, one love interest...when you’re close like that, your preferences tend to align, as is the case with Si Tu Feng and Gu Nan Xi...apparently more than once

Gu Nan Xi realises first Qingchen and Chen QingQing are the same person, Qingchen being the girl he’d fallen for and Chen Qing Qing clearly being the girl Feng had fallen for

He’s torn bc that’s his homie but also he technically liked her first??? To make things worse for him, he also starts falling for Qing Qing knowing that the two girls are the same and also bc she’s a cool friend who he appreciates and cares for

So he’s in love with both. Feng only likes Qing Qing. Nan Xi is in a bind. What does he do??

HE GIVES UP ON QING QING

He is forced to watch on as they become all lovey doves and romantic and he has his feelings just there with nowhere to go

HE EVEN SETS UP FIREWORKS FOR EVERYONE ESPECIALLY QINGQING TO ENJOY ON HER BIRTHDAY BUT THEN THEY ALL DISAPPEAR AND THEN HE FINDS FENG ROMANCING QQ UNDER THE TREE WITH A SONG AND HIS VERY SPECIAL GUITAR PICK GIVEN TO HIM BY HIS MOTHER AND NX IS ALL PISSED AT GOING TO THE TROUBLE OF GRABBING FIREWORKS AND HAS TO WATCH THIS LOVE SCENE AND TELLS HIMSELF NOT TO HELP ANYMORE OR KEEP THE MOOD GOING BUT LIGHTS THE FIREWORKS ANYWAY??!?!?! IM SO MAD THEY DIDNT GO BACK AND APPRECIATE HIS GIFT!!!!

He admits his feelings to her but knows that he’ll never have the same connection with her that she has with Feng and tells her as much and accepts their friendship and all g mcgee

Even when Feng has misunderstandings bc of Xinya, he keeps coming back to try and convince Feng of the misunderstandings and never NOT ONCE did that thing second leads do where they say “well fine I’ll have her then if you don’t want her bc I’ve been holding back all this time” BC HIS GADDAMN LOYALTY TO HIS BEST FRIEND IS SO FRIGGEN FIERCE