#also i do want to watch the movies now that i have read the book so i can understand just why it was disliked. i cannot remember the

[deepestnightcolor]

☾ ᴄᴜᴘɪᴅ'ꜱ ᴄʜᴏᴋᴇʜᴏʟᴅ ☽

Happy Valentine's, everyone! I hope that, if you want, you can spend your day surrounded by love. Remember, it doesn't always have to be romantic love. It can be a wish you fulfilled yourself, a nice day spent with your friends and/or family, or just a day you eat chocolates. It could also be some time spent with your Valentine that I have brought today - he is already so excited to see you! Have a lovely day, everyone! You are loved <3

ᴀ/ɴ: This can be read as either just a fluff, just a smut, or a fluff leading into smut. It is your choice - it is pretty clear when the fluff ends. Do whatever you feel like, it is your choice!~ ᴘᴀɪʀɪɴɢ: Sam (SDV) x Fem!Reader

ᴡᴄ: 3000 words in total. Fluff: 1109 words. Smut: 1891 words.

ᴍᴅɴɪ ✧ ᴡᴀʀɴɪɴɢꜱ: Fluff: love. Smut: unprotected sex, piercings, 69, cursing, name-calling (slut, cocksleeve), praise, you get a pounding.

February had come around quietly, and with that, Valentine’s Day was fast approaching, which meant that Pelican Town started to get covered in a blanket of pink, red, sometimes glittery, heart-shaped love symbols. There were heart-shaped bouquets being sold in the two stores, candy in heart-shaped boxes, cheesy little garlands wrapping around lamp posts, and a billboard happily yelling ‘DON’T FORGET – 14TH OF FEBRUARY IS VALENTINE’S DAY’ at whoever dared to pass by. Of course, not everyone was happy about the pink cloud looming over the small town – Sebastian claimed pink and red ‘fucking hurt in the eyes and make people go blind in these amounts’, Leah didn’t quite understand why a specific day was needed to show anyone their loves and why it needed to be broadcasted like this, and Harvey, while not minding it, worried about ‘people being quite careless in their loving frenzy’. Shane, the old grump, was not Cupid’s biggest friend, either, quite the opposite. He rolled his eyes at every cheerful person he saw and grumbled about the extra workload of stocking up for a ‘made up holiday no one cares about’, even though he knew very damn well that he was going to shell out the money to buy a bouquet for both Jas and Marnie.

Sam, on the other hand, had been shaped by years of listening to his mother’s romance audio books with her while she had been cleaning, and by the romantic telenovelas she had been watching during the colder winter months, which was why it came to no one’s surprise that he not only enjoyed Valentine’s Day, but took it seriously. Especially now that he had met the love of his life – you.

All these years of training would not be in vain – and when Sam made his way to your farm, he came prepared. A bouquet in his one hand – don’t you dare think he had gotten you one from Joja, oh no, Sam had robbed gardens (he had begged Evelyn and Jodi to give him some flowers) for this baby – and a basket in the other. He had been genuinely thinking about holding a rose between his teeth like he had seen in some movies, but much to his dismay, the thorns had won that battle. Still, he was quite proud of what he had in store for you; a hand-drawn card with a letter scribbled on the back, a plushie you had once excitedly pointed out in a store but put back when you had seen the price tag, and – his personal favourite – a handmade bracelet that fitted the one he was wearing around his wrist. You had pointed it out on your first date, and he had spent DAYS recreating it. Yes, Sam was prepared, and nothing would deter him from spending a great Valentine’s with you, not Sebastian complaining about the colours, nor a grumpy co-worker making fun of the love songs he had been blasting through his headphones.

And it did go very damn well – he knew it from the moment you opened the door with that shining glimmer of excitement in your pretty eyes, giddy smile decorating your pretty features, making your face light up and, in turn, making him feel like the sun had climbed from the blue skies to press a tender kiss to his heart and soul. God, he loved you, and he knew he would forever love you the moment your arms wrapped him up in a tender hug. “Happy Valentine’s Day,” he whispered, pressing a lingering kiss to your head – to show you his affection, for one, but also to inhale your scent like he usually did. He was sure; this was what pure love felt like. Warm, and safe, and comfortable. Do not get him wrong – Sam had loved loads and been very loved, too; he loved his mom, his dad and his little brother, he loved Sebastian (and all of them had gotten their little gifts to show his appreciation today, no matter how much they grumbled about pink wrapping paper (Seb did that, with a smile on his face while thrusting a small box containing a gift for Sam toward the blond)) but you? He loved you.

“Come in,” you chirped, and Sam was quick to follow, especially when your fingers wrapped around his wrist to tug you inside, a small chuckle falling from his lips. The scent of pizza lingered in the air, and you had decorated the table in your dining room with a white cloth and some rose petals (that rose had lost the battle, and to be fair? It gave him a little satisfaction), a candle in the middle of it, the tiny flame working hard to dip its surroundings in a soft glow. The man had asked you if you had wanted to go out for dinner for today, but you had shaken your head while telling him you had another idea – and your man had been happy to oblige. He was even happier now that he was sitting across from you in the soft glow of candlelight, a heart-shaped pizza having joined the two of you on the table. “You look gorgeous,” he murmured, grin spreading on his face when his eyes fell on the plushie you had draped over your shoulders. “And he suits you well,” he added, chin pointing loosely toward your little companion, making you reach out to pat the soft head. “I know, right?” You smiled, puffing out your chest before your face suddenly softened. “Thank you so much again, Sam.” “No, thank you, baby,” he cooed back, squeezing your hand lightly, his other hand wandering to the necklace you had gifted him, the tigers eye pendant that dangled from it carefully mined and processed by you, “for the gift, and for being my girlfriend.” The smile you gave him made his heart melt, and for once, Sam was at a loss for words. He just had to take you in for a moment, really let it sink in that all of this was true – you being his. Him being allowed to make you happy. Him just- “Fuck, I love you so much,” he whispered, voice cracking as he looked at you, drinking up the smile you generously gifted him. The card you had made him had already brought him close to tears, and if the night kept going like this – he was indeed going to fucking sob. “I love you, too, Sammy Boy.” He knew you meant it, and he was thanking whatever Cupid that had been merciful enough to make this happen, even if it meant he would be crying from happiness.

It seemed like you really wanted to see him cry tonight, or why else were you wearing that slutty little lingerie set that hugged your curves the same way a bow would wrap around a gift? But that was what you were, right?  A gift – his gift. “So fucking gorgeous,” the blond slurred as he inhaled deeply, blue eyes already completely pussy-drunk. Sam hadn’t even bothered to take off those cute little panties that clung to your hips so nicely, he just didn’t have the time! All he had done was shove them to the side to have them out of the way, to have access to your sweet, sweet pussy, folds already glistening with wetness you had spread by grinding against his thigh as you had sat on his lap just moments before. You did not need to worry, though – your boyfriend was more than happy to lap up what you were giving him as he buried his fat cock in your mouth, weepy, pierced tip kissing the back of your throat.   “So…fucking…good,” he groaned into your cunt, words forced out between messy licks and sinful slurps, muffled by your gorgeous thighs that pressed against his face. You moaned around him in response, coaxing a small whimper from your significant other. He just couldn’t help himself, had to fuck your pretty mouth – just a little! He promised, just a few small thrust upwards, having you take his cock juuust a little more.

And you took it so well - his good girl, his perfect princess; swallowing around his cock even when he stuffed your mouth so full. He just had to reward you with quick licks and desperate suckles on your clit, grunting as your hips shifted to grind down on his face. He would happily take it if you gave him more of those tasty juices, would let you ride his face all day and night long if he could keep tasting you on his tongue as he let the metal ball nestled in the muscle drag over your most sensitive spots. Another moan vibrated through him, making the knot in his stomach tighten, his head becoming lighter. If he was going to die like this – smelling you, tasting you, with his cock down your tight throat, allowed to mindlessly hump at it – he was going to die the happiest man on the whole damn planet.

You worked his cock heavenly, up and down you went while your hips ground back and forth, using his tongue however you pleased. Sam could feel his eyes roll back in his head, needy bitch brain forcing him to try and nuzzle his head further into your cunt, lips wrapping around your clit to suck before his tongue circled your entrance. He could feel you tense on top of him as he edged his tongue inside of you, your breathing becoming heavier as your hands began to drag toward his balls. “Good schlut,” Sam moaned against you, hissing when he felt your fingers wrap around them, giving them a gentle squeeze. He was going to cum, he fucking knew it. His hand came down on your hip in a soft smack and the way you clenched around his tongue told him that you weren’t that far off the edge either, orgasm approaching faster than you would have liked to admit, but he ate you like you were the best meal he had ever and had, hitting all the right spots with his messy licks. A sound that could have been identified as “Sam” had your mouth been a little less of cock sounded against him, making his hips snap up again as a twitch ran through his dick, tongue lapping at you almost desperately as he felt you choke on him. Another smack to your hip had you whining, the stinging sensation combined with Sam’s lapping and sucking made your mind go blank. You were so close, so, so close to just come on your boyfriend’s face. Your breathing came in shallow breaths around him, hips grinding to chase that high, your thighs beginning to twitch as the neatly tied bow in your stomach started to come undone.

Another slurred sound left your mouth, eyes squeezing shut as you were ready to embrace the rushing feeling about to crash over you, but it didn’t happen. Quite the opposite. You didn’t feel anything anymore. No tongue lapping you up, no hands massaging your hips, no cock filling your mouth. No, that was not quite right. You did feel something – the mattress below you were being pinned down on. Sam, who you had been sitting just moments before, was hovering over you now, strands of blonde hair sticking to his sweaty forehead, cheeks reddened and chest flushed with arousal, a grin on his wet lips as he stared down at you.

“So fucking pretty,” he cooed, licking over his lips, his hand wrapped around the base of his cock as he let the pierced tip run through your soppy wet folds. “My princess,” he sighed, sucking in a sharp breath through his teeth as the head of his dick caught your twitchy hole, swallowing down a thick glob of saliva that was threatening to spill past his lips, “I am so sorry…jus’ needed you on my cock s’badly, need that pretty fuckin’ cunt to swallow me whole, jus’- jus’ like thaaaat, fuck,” he whined as he pushed his tip past the ring of your cunt, his eyes rolling in the back of his skull. This surely wasn’t the first time the two of you fucked, but feeling your walls wrap around him always made the breath be knocked out of his lungs.

He took a gasping lungful of air as he slowly pushed forward, his eyes flickering from your face to your pussy, watching your sweet little cunt stretch to accommodate his size, back up to your face to see the dick-drunken look in your eyes. Another deep breath was needed before he could finally pull back, one of his hands wrapping around your ankle to push your leg back – he just needed deeper access, just needed all of you to wrap around him like the pretty little cocksleeve you were.

“My girl,” Sam croaked, soaking in the string of moans that fell from your lips, his hips starting to pump in and out of you slowly, letting the feeling of your wet gummy walls around him really sink in as he pulled back, just to be bottoming out inside of you completely again. Poor Sam was never able to keep up this slow pace for long, however. You simply were too much of a delicious treat for him to stay with this slow rock of hips, especially when you moaned his name like this – all stupid and needy. You pretty much didn’t give him any other choice than to hump into you quickly, filling you up just to pull back and fuck inside of you again in a fast pace, have your tits bounce as your eyes rolled, nails digging into his shoulders as you whined and begged for more. Really, he just needed to rut into you like his life depended on it, his dick had to bully your poor cunt, metal of his piercing dragging along your walls in a toe-curling caress. He simply loved you so much, and fucking you like this was the best way to show it, wasn’t it?

“Saaaahammm!” You whined, your hips snapping forward, nerve endings still raw and tingling from how close you had been before, but Sam did not let up. Your boyfriend pounded your cunt, his pierced tongue lulling out of his mouth, just to drag over your hardened nipple moments later, whimpering when your back arched toward him to have him suck it into his mouth.

The wet sounds of both his mouth sucking your nipple and your bodies meeting in a rough kiss didn’t veil what the two of you were doing, and your yells of his name only told the walls of the room who was fucking you so well, who made you see sparks with each thrust. “’M gonna cum! Sam, I am gonna cum! Fuck,” you cried, hips bucking helplessly to meet his thrust, to have him impossibly deeper, to take what was given to you. “Yes, baby, cum for me! Cum for me, make that cunt gush ‘round my cock, please, fuck, you are gonna gush around my cock,” he growled, moan rolling off his tongue as his dick pulsed.

Dick fucking into you roughly as your body began to tremble, taut muscles twitching as your back arched in again, your lower lip quivering as you tried to let a sound escape, but the force of your orgasm had you in a chokehold, leaving your brain empty and vocal chords unmoved until finally, a high-pitched cry of his name tore from you, your cunt spasming around his cock, pretty walls massaging his girthy shaft.

“That’s it, princess, hoooo, that’s fucking iiiit.” The groaned words were drawled, his own orgasm having his balls pull tight toward his body, breaths coming out in quick puffs. You looked up at him with love in your eyes, the high of your orgasm having blown the thoughts from your mind, and Sam was not holding up much better. He couldn’t think about anything but how much he loved you, and each soft smack of the pendant against his lean chest served him as another reminder.

“Gonna fill ya up, baby, all the way. You want my cum, hm? Want me to fuck my cum into that pretty cunt, yes? Come on,” he whispered, squishing your cheek with gentle fingers, small moan of appreciation sounding when you nodded eagerly. So dumb and yet so greedy for his dick and cum, weren’t you? Fuck.

A sudden hitch in his breath as Sam fucked deep inside of you, humping into your cunt without pulling out much, craving to cum as deep inside of you as humanly possible. “Saaaam, please. Need your cum!” You sobbed, toes curled and legs shaking. Sam couldn’t hold back anymore, cock twitching as thick ropes of cum filled your cunt. Quick breaths were pressed through Sam’s teeth, his hips working his sensitive dick into your cunt to truly stuff you full as your clenching walls worked on milking him nothing but dry. Slurred words tumbled from his lips, produced by his fuck-drunken brain and not at all coherent, but they didn’t need to be for you to understand them as praise, welcoming them with a weak moan as your body trembled as you neared overstimulation.

Your boyfriend’s thrusts slowed inside of you, becoming more of lazy drags and small shoves as he looked into your eyes, his hand slowly guiding your leg back on the mattress, instead finding your cheek to cup as he finally stilled inside your abused little pussy.

You both stayed like that for a while, silently staring into one another eyes, basking in the sweaty aftermaths of your orgasms, before the blond finally leaned down to press a kiss on your slightly swollen lips. “Happy Valentine’s Day, baby,” he whispered, when you finally parted, making you chuckle weakly. “Happy Valentine’s, Sammy,” you whispered, cleavage flushed, looking like an absolute angel, and he knew he was fucking done for.

[infini-tree]

episodic - part 4

< back | next >

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Summary: Everyone doubles down.

A/N: alternative chapter summary: Melvin Has A Normal Day.

once again thank you art of book for listing all the faculty names and subjects. 

on that note: Melvin's characterization. since this au is primarily based on movie continuity, in the end i decided to defer to its lead. which makes things difficult, as most of his inventions were all pretty lowkey (and the turbo toilet had been further augmented by a third party), and some future plots hinge on his more OP inventions. scene 2 is meant to bridge the character gap between all his incarnations, and also narratively sets some stuff up for this AU. i did say he's a core secondary,

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With the final bell rung, Benjamin made quick work of packing his suitcase. Considering how fast the kids ran out of the school, the halls should be quiet now. The last thing he needed was noise and talking. And so, he stepped out into a reception room filled with faculty. 

Not just talking– yelling. At him.

He glanced over to Anthrope, who should have shooed them all away. Her now-empty seat was still swivelling. 

“Of course,” he grumbled.

“Whadd'ya mean 'of course'?” Rected griped.

“We’re up to our eyelids in marking these brats’ worksheets!” Ribble waved a stack of papers at his face– all from the impromptu beach day, if he read the date right. “And you expect us to mark an entire grade’s worth of volcano projects?!”

“Clearly it's not just the students that need to apply themselves.” 

The rest of the teachers froze.

“Excuse me?”

“You heard me.” He narrowed his eyes, his tone still as clipped from the announcements. “Aren’t you the one always complaining about their marks?”

“Well, yes, but–”

“But nothing, you're the one who insisted on teaching three subjects.” He moved on to other teachers. “Meaner, you’re only doing the running tests– I don’t see why you’re complaining. The most you have to do is make sure they don’t trip over their own shoelaces.”

“The papers–”

“Because its so hard keeping track of when kids stop running.” He turned to Guided. “And you– all the tests are based on stuff your class should have covered by now.”

Guided grumbled something about how the topics were from the start of the semester, no one remembers that.

“Dayken–” Said teacher jolted up from the back. “What are you even doing here? You're a kindergarten teacher.”

“I wanted to feel included--”

“In any case, all I’m hearing–” He pointed an accusatory finger at all of them. “Is that all of you are mad that you need to actually do your job.”

“Excuse you?!” Ribble shot back. No other teachers spoke up.

“Yeah, that’s what I’m trying to do before you barged in here.” He pointed at Rected and Ribble. “You have until the end of the week to make it work.”

He could feel something tighten in his chest flare as he saw the teachers back off. It wasn’t relief, but it was a near thing. At least he wasn’t on the back foot. 

“Dismissed.” The tone broached no argument.

The impromptu staff meeting ended– not with a bang, but a whimper. More accurately, it was a grumble of swears that cannot be recounted in a fanwork made for general audiences. He watched all the teachers skulk out of the room with a leveled glare. 

None of them dared to look back.

If we could have, we would have. Who else would agree?

He stood there until he was absolutely sure he couldn’t hear anyone nearby. After that, it was just a matter of going down the steps. Of making it through the hallway. 

Ignoring how unmoored he felt. He looked to his feet– left, right, left, right. Repeat until he was at the door.

It wasn’t the first time anyone would have thought that about him. Heck, it wasn’t the first time the quiet part was said out loud. It was, however, the first time it was actually doable.

Someone tapped him on the shoulder. “Hey, Ben?”

“Guh–” He whirled around. “Edith!”

She blinked. He stared. The silence lingered a bit too long for his liking, though it was clear she wanted to say something. 

“Do you need anything?” he managed.

“Are you alright?” When no answer came, she continued to trail off. “I mean, I– I saw everyone goin’ up to your office. And then there was the announcement earlier, so–”

“Of course I am.”

Another blink. “O– oh, uh, ok, then…”

“OK, then.” 

Edith persisted. She trailed behind him closely as he came closer to the door. Most days he’d be a little endeared to it, but right now, right now–

“So, where are you going to set up this whole ‘science fair’? You, uh. Forgot to mention it.”

Of course he did. “The cafeteria. It has the space for it.”

He held a hand up to the door. 

“I guess the floors have to be cleaned early…” she mumbled. “Uh, hey– wait!”

He had barely half-opened it.

“If you need anything, just ask, OK?” Then, in a lower voice, she added: “I don’t know why you’re actually doin’ this, but–”

His hand was gone as he whipped back to look at her. “Actually?” he snapped back. 

“I– I know you, and you wouldn’t be doin’ this without a reason.”

“Know me?”

His rage was already so spent– from the boys, the teachers, the other guy, it can only persist for so long. It doesn’t billow out so much as burn him out from the inside. And when pushed that far, something had to give.

“It took you a month to realize I wasn’t being an idiot on purpose,” he said. “The real question is why didn't I do it sooner.” 

Edith’s eyes widened and her shoulders shrank at the remark. Guilt curdled in him, but it was a distant thing. He wanted to leave. He wanted to reach out and take it back. His body chose the worst compromise between the two and made him stand there like an idiot.

“OK then.” She looked away. “Um, I guess I’ll prep the cafeteria for it then.”

“OK then,” was all Benjamin could manage before she left to do just that. Which was fine. That’s what he wanted, right? He needed to get going too.

Left, right, left, right. Car. Drive. He forced himself to focus on the road completely. To hold onto the wheel like a lifeline. And it worked. At least until he hit the first red light– and then the thoughts crept in.

He should have said something different. He should have said it differently. What kind of answer was I should have done it sooner, anyway? 

His knuckles turned bone-white at his grip. 

Still, he felt unmoored– like a sharp turn would make him leap out of his own body, and– If we could have, we would have, George’s voice rattled in his head. They had the motive, and they had shown time and time again they had the means. 

And yet here he still was: sweating in sixty-degree weather.

He wasn’t sure what that meant, but it was yet another thing to mull over and hang over the other guy.

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For the next two days, the elementary school was a minefield for George and Harold. Which was why they found themselves stumbling around a corner and quickly entering the nearest empty classroom. The small mob ran past the corner none the wiser.

Harold gave a forlorn look to the stack of comics in his arms. “I don’t know how much of the sales can take this.”

“Hey, don’t worry about it.” George placed a hand to the other boy’s shoulder. “We’ll figure it out. Together.”

A pause. The other boy gave a cautious look around, now that they had a moment to breathe.

“Well, maybe put that on hold for five minutes, what the heck is up with this classroom?”

The classroom looked normal for the most part– if you ignored the absurd number of desks. There had to be triple the amount– several stacked up on each other like a fortress or maze walls. One precarious tower looked further away than it should be possible in a room this size, but it could easily be tiny desks.

“What the…”

“You two!” a voice cried.

“Ah!” Harold yelled.

“Ah!” George yelled with a little jump.

‘Ah,’ Melvin did not yell. Instead, he said: “I’m surprised you two aren’t out for recess.”

They were still standing by the door so there was no chance of him sneaking past them, and his shock of ginger hair would have stood out if he had decided to stay in. 

“Yeah, well, I’m surprised you, uh… you…” George said, letting the statement hang. “-- That you’re not working on something for that pop science fair.”

Melvin didn't react. He didn’t know whether it was better or worse– especially after Krupp made that dreaded announcement.

“What is it this time?” he continued, gesturing to the desks. “Something that increases the amount of class per classroom?"

"A scale model of the school’s pop science fair-- with additional statistics?” Harold added.

“Something to make people remember why they went into a room!” George added with a laugh, before snapping to a more contemplative look. “No wait, that’d actually be… not half-bad.”

“Hm. I’ll make a note of those,” Melvin said as he continued to stand there and not do that. The conversation lulled into silence a beat longer than comfortable. Before they could speak up, he added: “And for your information, I am working on it. Hold on.”

The both of them gave another cautious once-over to the room. The room– outside of the weird amount of desks– looked normal. It looked free of any invention, save for the muffled rattling noise. George had even peeked behind the teacher’s desk on the off chance it was hidden. 

“What do you mean hold on? There isn’t anything here.”

Melvin didn’t answer. 

Instead, the walls and some of the surrounding fixtures started shimmering different colors before settling on the color of error bars you see on TV.

Harold jumped away from a nearby desk he was leaning on as he felt it shift and become less sturdy, wobbling like heat hazes. As they lifted up to the ceiling, the whir had become a fraction louder.

“What’s going on?” he turned around. “Melv– ah!”

George let out a yell, seeing Melvin’s shape shimmer until he was a mass of red and greens. He ran to him, and his first instinct was to try and grab where his shoulder was. All his fingers met was air. Then thin strands as his hand sailed past where his shoulders would be and into the now-clump of what was the tattletale.

“Melvin!”

The strands rose up and darted away like all the other ones until they were standing in a regular classroom with its usual amount of desks and a third smaller than it looked before.

“He was too young!” George said.

“It should have been me!” Harold threw himself to the ground, bashed a fist against it, and stopped. He thought for a moment before continuing in the same dramatic cadence: “OK, I take it back, that’s a bit too much, but you get it!”

“Are you two done yet?” 

“I swear I can still hear his voice, even now–” the boy whipped his head around so fast his tie went askew. “Melvin!”

He got out of his overdramatic kowtow. “What the heck?!”

“Like I said, I’m working on the Warp-Weft-O-Tron 2000,” he said like it would explain everything. “Stress-testing it, to be more accurate.”

“The wh–” Before George could finish his sentence, the other boy stood up and pointed at the whirring thing behind Melvin.

In the corner of the classroom, around some tools and papers was something that took the space of two desks. Upon closer inspection, it looked like a sewing machine grafted beside a blocky computer . The needle continued its work and its now-unobscured rattling.

They all followed the threads converged to the machine, now completely colorless. They could just barely see the shiny thread zip through it and up the machine until even that thread dissipated. And once it did, the needle made its final whirring before powering down.

The adrenaline of seeing a kid disintegrate, like the strings a few seconds ago, dissipated to incredulity. 

“What kind of science is that thing for–” Harold pointed an accusatory finger at the machine. “Freak-People-Out-ology?!”

“It's built on the principles of techno-textiles and a bit of virtual simulation.” Melvin clicked his pen a few times before pointing it at them. “How about you two?”

“Huh?”

That was apparently the wrong answer as he put a finger to his temple. “I’m merely curious what you’re working on, seeing as Krupp’s announcement said you two suggested the pop science fair.”

And you believe him? George wanted to say, before answering his own question– of course he’d believe that.

Or at the very least, he wouldn’t cast further doubt. Doubting Krupp would mean doubting The Man. Plus, grades were on the line, and that was top priority to the tattletale than trying to think through whether they would ever suggest that.

It had only occurred now to George that that was the reason why Melvin wasn’t automatically on the defensive.

“We’re, uh– keeping it under wraps,” Harold said, realizing the other boy was taking too long to reply.

“Of course.” Melvin nodded in understanding as he made his way to the Warp-Weft-O-Tron and pulled out a spool the size of a lava lamp sitting on top of the sewing machine half. Its threads were soot grey and frayed. He placed it to the side and put an empty spool in its place, but not without grumbling about the material being insufficient.

“I will admit, the sudden nature of this assessment adds a wrench to everything, but– nothing like the stress of an unforeseen deadline to get everything in gear.”

Harold stared at the machine, and then to the boy still engrossed in fixing… whatever. In gear was an understatement if he made a simulation machine on a time crunch.

“You were really holding out on us all these years,” George said, eyeing the computer.

Rows of code scrolled up its screen. Most of it was gibberish, but there were parts he could understand. A record of previous commands and whether it was typed out or recorded through audio. S., MELVIN x1, DESK x15, and more distressingly, a MATERIAL PROCESS WARNING, whatever that was.

“How’d a sock sorter beat this out when you were picking out stuff for the Invention Convention?”

He poked around a nearby toolbox– which was more of a folder of assorted squares of materials. Many of them looked like normal threads, but a good chunk of them weren’t, from how the light bounced off them. 

“Firstly: it's a sock matcher. Secondly: Krupp only accepts the ‘practical’ ones–” He pulled out a square of the latter and placed it in an adjacent slot. Something between contemplation and annoyance edged into his tone. “The Turbo Toilet was pushing it. But, the pop science fair has no such restrictions!” 

“...It doesn’t?”

A thread the same color as the square spat out of some unseen cavity and began wrapping itself around the spool.

“I asked Ms. Ribble about the specificities for this assignment, and she said, and I quote: ‘sure, do what you need to do’.”

George and Harold both sucked a breath through their teeth. Unlike the tattletale, they knew that wasn’t full permission, so much as the classic grown-up tactic of dismissing a kid by giving them a vague answer to sate them.

“Guess not even tattling can get you all the perks you want,” Harold said carefully.

Melvin stopped typing on the computer part of the machine for a moment. With him faced away, they weren’t sure what expression was on his face, but they could feel a shift. Nothing as drastic as what happened in the principal’s office, but it was there.

“You should go.” It wasn’t a suggestion. “I need to troubleshoot.” 

Harold looked to the clock. Recess was almost over, which meant their opportunities to prepare were dwindling.

“Right,” George said.

And they slipped back into an empty hallway. They looked back, and through the window-sliver on the door, they could see the threads shoot up and around the room. The classroom became a black void, though it slowly made its way along the color spectrum.

“What do you think?” Harold asked.

“That our playground street cred is in the gutter at this rate,” George replied.

He gave him a light punch on the arm. Despite everything they couldn’t help but laugh, the sound echoing through the hall. 

“We could use it in the Captain Plan,” Harold replied. “It might be a little difficult to, ah–”

“Turbo Toilet it?” George finished, thinking back to the Invention Convention. He watched as Melvin tried to recalibrate it. “It’s a pretty big wildcard.”

As if on cue, after a few basic prisms popped into existence in the classroom, a rough approximation of a cat did. That, apparently, was too much as the simulation spooled itself back up like before. 

“But I think we do need a wildcard. It'd drive Krupp up the wall.”

Harold winced. “Well, I mean it can’t make anything worse.”

The both of them walked off to the abandoned art room. Harold shuffled his backpack to the front of him as he counted up the supplies he pilfered. To name a few: flour and water to make glue on the fly. Baking soda and vinegar, because those were Classics. Toilet paper– ‘nuff said.

He stared at a box labelled Office Supplies. In it were huge packs of sticky notes, for irony.

As wrong as Melvin was about whose idea the pop science fair was, he was right, frustratingly, about one thing: nothing like the stress of a deadline to get everything in gear.

---------------------

The Captain Plan was one of their simpler plans, in theory. 

It was simple in the sense that it was meant to only target Krupp. The hard part, for obvious reasons, was that Captain Underpants was integral to said plan.

It amounted to swapping them out at strategic places they set up. Things he can’t stand. Things that he’d be afraid of. Long enough for the experience to stick. Then they’d swap him back to Captain and slowly amp it up. Rinse and repeat.

They’d keep doing this until he took everything back– the whole assignment gauntlet, the whole thing with the science fair–

The whole capital T Thing with Captain. 

And if he refused, well– there wasn’t anything else for it except to rinse and repeat until he did. They’ve got almost half a decades’ worth of grievances to pull back up. 

(“Krupp won’t– can’t expel us for this,” George said the night before, his form backlit by a jumbo flashlight. “I mean, he’ll need us to ‘deal’ with Captain.”

The Treehouse’s windows were boarded up to get ready for the colder weather. They should be prepping it for winter, putting stuff away so it won’t get messed up, since they insisted they didn’t need George’s parents’ help, but here they were– 

“I mean, he could hold us back now.”

“But would he really want to keep us there if we keep doing this?”

Harold shivered. “Point taken.”)

The walkie-talkie in Harold’s pocket made a noise. 

“Yyyello’.”

“How’s it going?”

Right now, the ‘it’ in question was scoping out the cafeteria. The tables were all neatly arranged in rows and ready for whatever project the fourth graders will put on them later. There was no one here save for Edith, who was deep in the kitchen.

“Melvin’s stuff is here.” 

He made his way over to the Warp-Weft-shaped tarp. After double checking for any Tattle-Turtles, he was disappointed to find no obvious screws to loosen at the access hatch.

Harold began pulling at the spool on top, unsure of how exactly to mess it up outside of tying the thread in knots. One end of the thread snaked its way to the needle, while the other end–

The other end came out of a small hole, which in turn was connected to the strange hatch Melvin put in that material square that one time. He pulled out a pair of undies, courtesy of Captain himself, and stuffed it into the slot.

The sewing machine whirred, clearly having difficulty with processing a non-square material. The thread didn’t move to spool itself, but it must have processed it by the way the underpants were disappearing in the slot.

As for the computer: it reminded him more of the school printer. There were menus upon menus of settings. In any case, Harold set out to randomly poking at them all. Some he understood– audio commands on, because that may be useful for their plan since it would be easier than trying to get close to type anything out. Everything else?

“...What the heck is a Young’s Module?” Harold asked, less out of curiosity and more to commentate for George’s benefit. “What do you think? Max or minimum?”

“I mean, Krupp’s pretty old…” his voice crackled through the walkie talkie.

“High it is!” And with that, he quickly swiped it as far to the right as he could before quickly closing everything out to the first screen. “OK, I’ll get back to y–”

“Ben!” Edith’s voice called out from across the cafeteria.

Harold ducked under the tarp before either of them could see him.

“We got a situation. Krupp’s here,” he whispered loudly.

“What? Why?!”

Harold hazarded to peek at the small gap between the tarp and the floor. He had been expecting like-liking goo-goo talk. If he had to be honest, he would have preferred that to whatever angry inspector routine Krupp was doing.

“Checking, I think.” 

He tilted his head at the principal running a finger over a table for dust. The action was clearly more for acting out… whatever this was, than any actual concern for cleanliness. The lunch lady continued to trail behind him, trying– and failing– to start a conversation.

There was a quick inhaling noise through the speakers. “OK, give me a minute. Move when I give the signal.”

Harold didn’t reply, mostly because they were close enough that he could hear them. Even from this distance, he could see how heavy the bags under his eyes were. How his posture was more hunched than usual.

Krupp sighed deeply, and his shoulders sagged even further. “I’ve been through worse. Trust me.” It almost sounded like a plea.

The lunch lady had no time to dwell on a response as the intercom screeched to life.

“Principal Krupp, please report to your office immediately,” George’s voice crackled through the intercom with a mock-smug air.

“Oh, for–” Said principal ran past her brusquely that the pin that was keeping her bangs up over her face had jostled to cover half her eye.

The signal!

“Good talk!” she called after him belatedly, but made no move to go after him. Then with a big sigh, she mumbled, “I’m blowin’ this.”

And with that, she made her way back to the kitchen and finally gave Harold an opening to get out of there. He made a mad dash to the doors, making sure to not slam it as he trailed him. Now that he was in the hallway, the faint sound of crackling and shuffling echoed throughout.

“Hey, how far is he from the office?” George asked, his voice crackling from both walkie talkie and still-active intercom.

“He’s making his way up as we speak.” 

“Cool.”

Krupp was up the first half of the stairs when he turned around. He was breathing heavily, and it was definitely not just because he was speed-walking up the stairs.

“You two have got a lot of nerve disrupting everything–”

“You’re one to talk,” Harold replied, thinking about the pop science fair coming up in a few hours. To all their years in school. To the capital T Thing with Captain.

The principal halfway down a step to approaching him until–

SNAP. The sound reverberated through the school intercoms. For a split second he saw something cross his face. Wide eyes. Furrowed brows.

And then Captain Underpants fell on said face.

He snapped back up, the toupee sitting lopsided on his head. “Sidekick! Where’s–”

Harold held up the walkie talkie. 

“Up here,” George replied.

He gave an unsure look as he tried to find where up was in relation to a walkie talkie.

“In the office,” Harold clarified. He walked past him and up the stairs, motioning him to follow.

Captain stood up, wiping the grit from his cheek. It might be because he took a heck of a tumble, but there wasn’t the typical shock of liveliness he expected when he swapped in. All things considered, he was… well, maybe not calm, but expectant.

George was standing at the receptionist half of the office, one of the curtains tucked under his arm. 

“You ready?” Then, in a stage whisper to Harold: “Anthrope’s gone off because of… ‘printer repairs’.”

Harold stared at the empty corner of the room. There was a smattering of printer ink at the walls, outlining the office printer that was not there anymore. They couldn’t help but snicker conspiratorially.

“Er,” Captain leaned over to look at what had got their attention. “What’s the plan to Free The Children now, sidekicks?” 

“We’re putting Krupp through his own personal gauntlet.”

“I don’t think it’ll take long for him to crack.” Harold gave him a reassuring pat on the arm. “We’ll make sure of it. Everything’ll be back to the way it was faster than–”

“A speeding waistband?” the superhero offered. He was definitely hiding it as he shimmied out of the principal’s clothes and put on his cape, but that same look was back on his face. 

“Exactly.”

“Where do we start?” He approached the ink stains on the wall, as if expecting the answer to pop out of the mess.

“Uh, Captain?” George pulled his attention back to the door of the principal’s office. He opened it with an overdramatic flourish. “Just step into our office for this first bit.”

Harold let out a low whistle at the sight. Every surface of the room was covered in sticky notes, leaving the room in an unsightly pale yellow that made the room look flat. Between the writing and the shadows, it did little to help figure out where everything was as Captain nearly tripped on a chair.

“What do you think of our Prankovation 2– trademark?”

Captain took to floating, mindful not to touch anything. He looked confused– he probably didn’t get things like irony yet. “…How long did this even take you?”

“Prankster’s trade secret.”

“This looks done, though,” he hedged. “I’m not sure how I’m supposed to help you here– especially with this–”

He gestured to his wrists, now tied together by jump rope courtesy of Harold. The boy went over to the sticky notes-engulfed water cooler and poured out a thimble’s amount into an open hand.

“For this one, we need to swap you back over to Krupp,” George explained. Seeing the superhero's disappointed look, he quickly continued: “This part's quick-- we're going to bring you back right after for the next bit.” 

“O– OK, then sidekicks. I trust you.” Captain twisted around so his face was in patting distance. This close, he could see the expression for what it was– hesitation.

And Captain was gone, leaving Krupp to fall on the floor, a flutter of pale yellow in his wake.

[purplesimmer455]

Meanwhile, in San Sequoia:

Emily comes back from school, and her mom is in the driveway to greet her. "Hey Ems, how was your day?" Megan asks, pulling Emily into a bear hug. "It was pretty uneventful, but good I guess. How was your day?" She asks and Megan smiles. "Good and uneventful too. I did some writing, planned a lecture for my college students, and checked in with your ma. She's apparently not going to have cell service for a day and a half because she'll be climbing Mt. Komorebi, but she'll check in with us as soon as she can." Megan says, her brows creasing a bit with worry. "It's okay mom, she's trained and is going with Kado and some other friends who can help her out if anything happens," Emily says, hiding the worry in her own voice. "Yeah, she'll be fine," Megan says, mostly to reassure Emily but also for herself.

The two head up to their apartment, and Megan starts making Mapo tofu with pork for dinner. Emily takes out her math and English homework assignments, and works on them while she and her mom talk about a book they've both been reading before going into the next topic. "Mom, there's something I've been meaning to bring up." Emily says, keeping her eyes trained on her homework. "Sure," Megan calls from the kitchen. "Kir and I were thinking of taking the next step with each other, and we want to be safe so they're asking their parents and I wanted to ask you if I could go on birth control," she says quickly. Megan nods, trying hard to stay casual. "That's fine, Emmy, and I'm glad you and Kiran are being responsible. I'll call Dr. West and set up an appointment for you and you can discuss it with her and go on the pill," she says and Emily nods. "Thanks mom," she says.

Emily finishes her homework, texts Kiran that she had the talk, and then has dinner with her mom. After dinner, Emily watches TV with Megan. It's quieter in their new apartment with just the two of them than it was back at their old house where she lived with her moms as well as her aunties and cousins Hamuera and Piper. Emily feels a lump in her throat as she thinks of movie nights with her mom and ma, snuggling on the couch, and hanging out with her aunties and cousins in the backyard. She pushes it away as her mom glances at her, and without a word, Megan takes her hand and squeezes it. Emily smiles, squeezing her mom's hand back and sighs as she settles into the couch.

After the movie, Emily heads downstairs to throw away the trash and runs into her oldest cousin, Quentin. He's the son of her auntie Peyton* and uncle Jared and out of all the Feldmans, he's the most calm and quiet**. "Hi Emmy," he says, and Emily grins. "Hey Q," she says. "How are you and auntie Megs doing?" He asks, his face serious, and Emily shrugs. "Better now, we're still adjusting to the new place but I'm glad we live next to you, Malaya, Casey, Darren, Cam, and Pipes so it's not as lonely or quiet," She admits and Quentin nods and sighs. "I understand, it's tough to uproot your life and have everything change. If you ever want to talk or hang out, I'm here too," he says and Emily grins. "Thanks Q, but I don't want to bother you too much. I know you're busy with med school," she says but he shakes his head. "True, but I always have time for family and friends," he adds with a smile and Emily smiles back. She's not as close to Quentin as she is to her cousins her age, but he's always been kind to her.

[aviradasa]

I love your writings dude! Sm! Seeing some laddie hcs from you would be sick! You don’t see much of him from the movie, nor the book even if it adds a little bit more. I feel like they focus on star more. Maybe his dynamic with the boys and stuff? How was he found? Who is he closest with, probably Dwayne and Paul tbh. Also do you think he knows he’s a half vampire? I feel like he would be more scared of David and Marko, mostly David. What does he like to do for fun since he literally lives under a rock. Does he have the same music taste as the boys, can he watch films, can he read and what does he like to read? Also does he have any friends or is he just with Star and the boys all the time. I feel like that would be no because maybe parents o the boardwalk wouldn’t want their children around the boys. I have these kinds of thoughts all the time, about the boys and Star too but with the hcs and fics I can read I feel like I can piece them together better than laddie considering there’s little writing about him. (A funny thing too, would the boys try to not cuss around laddie? I feel like Paul would do it on purpose so Star would get mad or something)

Omg I have been waiting to do these for so long. It won't let me post the long version on here though so I'm gonna make an A03 account.

General laddie hcs

I HC Laddie as the star's younger brother, and when she got involved with the boys at first, she was having a good time. Then something happened to their parents and Laddie was going to be put into the system which Star didn't want to happen so she wanted to leave and David wouldn't let her so she made a deal with him to take Laddie so that she would stay Laddie is indeed closest to Dwayne because he and Laddie have similar personalities. Laddie is kinda quiet and pretty shy for a kid his age and Dwayne Remembers that when he was that age he was very similar. Laddie also likes Paul a lot cause Paul has a little bit of a soft spot for kids and he's the one that spoils Laddie. if Laddie sees something on the boardwalk, and he wants it. He's going to Paul cause he knows Paul will make it happen even if Star or Dwayne say no. Dwayne kinda helps Star raise Laddie cause he saw her struggling with him at first and decided to help. They are basically besties who share a kid. Now, laddie mostly Avoids David because after David took (kidnapped) him, laddie became attached to him at the hip. After all, he was just grateful to be with his sister again. But David was not having it. He wasn't trying to be an ass he just didn't want to get attached to the kid Cause he knew that with the life they lived he may not survive and he just didn't want that on his conscious so he pushed him away. Now Marko kinda freaks Laddie out a bit because Marko can be a bit..unstable. Marko Can have these really drastic and really sudden mood swings, It doesn't help that Marko will lowkey be really good with Laddie for a little bit, like showing him artwork, helping fix His stuff to suddenly just freaking the fuck out whenever Laddie comes up to him so he just Avoids marko. Laddie absolutely loves playing games with the boys and star.his favorites are physical/board games due to the cave not having electricity. He LOVES hide and seek.His all-time favorite. Some nights star will help him convince the other boys to all go outside to play with him. Another favorite of laddies is tag.But he doesn't like playing with the boys cause they are a lot faster than he is, But he does play with Star,and when Max allows it, he loves playing tag with Thorn. He also likes going To maxs house cause he can watch Scooby doo.It's his favorite show He also absolutely loves watching Jem and the holograms As well! laddie also likes to make up his own games.However, some of his games start to worry Star because they are a bit violent, and it makes her wonder if some of the things he's hearing may be influencing him wrong. Especially when Laddie ran up to her with a ripped-up teddy bear and asked her if she thought the Bear learned its lesson yet. She snatched that bear so quick- and then she had a long ass talk with him about no more torturing teddies When asked why he did it, and all Laddie said was that “he didn't like how it talked to his friends.” She thought that was weird cause Laddie didn't have any human friends. It's not that he's not allowed to have them but he just doesn't try to make them. After that whole deal though, star and dwayne Were talking and decided that everyone should start watching what they say around the kid Cause it's clearly fucking with him. Laddie Hates the censorship. He's at that age where hes in the “I'm not a little kid anymore” stage. He just wants to be part of the gang. So he goes to eavesdropping. He hears a lot of stuff he shouldn't, and it's also how he ends up learning he's a half-vampire. Laddie honestly didn't know what an actual vampire was. He had only heard the dumbed-down kid story versions of vampires but he was still scared. The boys also influence Laddie's music taste a lot. He loves all kinds of rock/metal cause of Them.they are his biggest role models so what they like. Laddie likes. Music, style, hobbies, if they like it, so does he. After learning the boys are vampires though all laddie wants is to be one which really makes it hard for star to resist giving into the pressure.

[recklessracoon]

Last song: Infinite Death by Tiramika

Fave Color: teal

Last book: If we're counting graphic novels it was Noragami volume 27, if we're not then it was probably Heaven Official's Blessing volume 4

Last Movie: Genuinely no idea

Last show: Mushoku Tensei, but in my defense, not by choice. My brother's friend was showing it to him over Discord last night and I decided to sit in on their watch session while I drew rather than spend the evening alone. My brother watched five episodes and opted not to continue because all the weird, inappropriately horny stuff that kept happening was too uncomfortable for him even if it is going somewhere with it, a decision I would have made before the end of the first episode were I watching it on my own.

Sweet/Savoury/Spicy: Savoury though spicy is also really good.

Relationship Status: I just described how I sat through 5 episodes of an anime that I didn't like to spend time with my brother. I think you can make an educated guess from that.

Last thing I googled: css transitions

Looking forward to: I recently procured a copy of Heaven Official's Blessing volume 5 and I'm looking forward to when the stars align for me to finally read it.

Current Obsession: I'm not really all that into anything right now, though I'd like to change that. That said, whatever mental real estate that I'm managing to use recreationally right now is mostly occupied by thoughts of either my own OCs or my two Saiki K WIPs.

I'd feel overly familiar tagging most people on here, but I guess that I can reach out to my discord friends @theboobird and @idontshipklance to ask them if they want to take part. Thinking about it, I've talked to @akirameta84 enough that I'm comfortable including them as well. No pressure though, it's fine if you aren't up for doing this.

Tag Game: People I'd Like to Get to Know Better!

Thanks for the tag @curufiin, and also I think @twofoursixohjuan has tagged me on this same kind of thing semi-recently and I never got to it.

Last Song: whatever was on the radio last at the nonprofit before I left tonight. But the last thing I listened to was the audiobook of The King's General by Daphne du Maurier.

Favorite Color: Curufiin has excellent taste, but I just expact to nearly any shade of green. Bonus points if it goes all golden when sunlight hits it.

Last Book: The Bog Wife by Kay Chronister (that I read with my eyeballs not my ears, but this was like. last week or so.)

Last movie: Laapataa Ladies

Last TV Show: ...great question. Um. Does youtube count? If not it was Shogun, and if yes then I think it was a cow hoof trimming video.

Sweet/savory/spicy: I have a profound sweet tooth, but I enjoy all three.

Relationship status: cheerful aroace spinster

Last thing I googled: "indian romcom switched brides" because I couldn't remember the name of the movie. Before that... probably something to do with the grant I'm working on, idk.

Looking forward to: I have some very fun nearly-finished sewing projects, and I strongly suspect a friend may be actively giving birth at the moment (the whole discord server is waiting to hear from her), and another friend is planning her bachelorette party and I might get to whisk her off for a chill mountain getaway after. <3 <3 <3

Current obsession: I'm between fascinations which is a bitch of a state to be in. But I might be getting my sewjo back, and I have some fun and silly painting projects underway.

I'm tagging: @theblacknessdyer, @twofoursixohjuan (if you haven't done one lately), @of-sevenseas, @feanorianethicsdepartment, @vvitchking

[snoopyhq]

˚ ♡ ⋆｡˚ ❀ so when the night falls, my lonely heart calls

type: arcane characters x reader

featuring: viktor, mel, jayce, vi, caitlyn, ekko, jinx

summary: how they spend valentine's day with you 💘 straight up fluff really.

a/n: a bit late because i was hanging out with my friends out of town and didn't get home to post this at a reasonable time. hope you guys enjoy!

divider used by @/saradika-graphics !!!

˚ ♡ ⋆｡˚ ❀ VIKTOR

a date at the botanical gardens! :3

taking walks with you around piltover has always been one of his favorite ways to unwind, so spending the day in a calm, sunny, pretty spot just seems right

you guys are holding hands and exploring the vast expanse of greenery

there's an insect exhibit, and rumor has it they have cricket delicacies on a stick...

he'll teasingly ask you if you're brave enough to take a bite

if you go along with it, he'll do it too

takes the prettiest candid pics of you ever

the curse of a 'bf who takes the most awful photos of you' does not exist with viktor

he's a perfectionist, and you can never look less than, in his opinion

he shows you the photos later, all shy and nervous and you're losing your mind at how he managed to capture everything so beautifully

"it's easy. you're always beautiful to me. capturing a second of it is no trouble. i just wish i could live every frame of you again over and over."

back in your shared apartment, he's organizing the layout for the next chapter in his photo album of you

you've started your own filled with photos of him

you guys go through them at the end of every year to reminisce on memories

the night unwinds with a glass of sweet wine and reading together by the fire, eventually falling asleep all cozied up on the couch <3

˚ ♡ ⋆｡˚ ❀ MEL

spa day

facial, manis, pedis, the whole package

a day of pampering her beloved!

she wants you to look and feel your best

the best type of love can be self-love, after all

after the spa, she takes you to an orchestral concert featuring renown musicians from the city and beyond

she's booked you both your own private balcony where you can watch the performance from the comfort of privacy and plenty of courses catered to your tastes

there's a gift exchange at home to top off the perfect day

you'd been agonizing on what to get her

councilor medarda? the brains, beauty, and vision of success? what could you give her that she can't simply buy when she feels like it?

you ended up making her gift. a jar decorated with fairy lights and resin'd petals on the outside, and filled with handwritten notes from you

the messages range from cheesy pickup lines to affirmations of how much you love her, and reminders for her to take a break

you also put together a small folder of tickets

each ticket reads something like "movie night", "dinner of your choice, on me", "painting date", etc. etc.

whenever she feels down, she can just pick one and you'll drop whatever you're doing and spend the rest of the day dedicated to that, and to her

she loves you and you love her so much

it's sickening. tooth rotting, even. definitely acts of service and quality time here

˚ ♡ ⋆｡˚ ❀ JAYCE

cooking together is a love language. sharing food that you've made together? hooray! how romantic is that?

especially if it's a cultural exchange of food

he's teaching you to make his mamá's birria tacos and rambling about parts of his childhood in the kitchen, helping her out

you're listening with a silly smile on your face

an expression of pure lovesickness

he's moving around the place with such ease, and the smell of comfort is heavenly

then it's your turn to walk him through something from your culture, and talk about your own stories associated with the dish/dessert/drink (whatever it is you wanna make)

me personally, i'll be making some bánh xèo (it's like a vietnamese crepe! very savory, very yummy)

half your plate is your food, and the other is jayce's birria tacos

cleanup can be dealt with later

right now, there's good food and better company to be have

it's a shared learning opportunity and serves to strengthen your bond :-)

˚ ♡ ⋆｡˚ ❀ VI

she's picking you up from your house first thing

ready with a "good morning!", kiss on the cheek, and a bouquet of your favorite flowers

wrapped in paper, of course <3

if you have chocolates for her, she'll melt right then and there in your arms

or maybe even chocolate covered strawberries you put together yourself!

you two are heading right to the arcade

paintball gets competitive. and messy

go clothes shopping for each other after

it's a chance for her to indulge in something she usually doesn't, and you get the chance to spoil your favorite girl in the whole world

she appreciates that you love her style and who she is and doesn't try changing who she is. because of that, she trusts you to help style her

once you're both newly out in some new clothes and kicks, you guys hit the highway

windows down, blasting your favorite songs and singing along at the top of your lungs

i love vi, i wish women were real :(

she's my favorite alongside viktor. AUGH.

˚ ♡ ⋆｡˚ ❀ CAITLYN

what's the point of having money and an influential family if not to rent out places, like a whole bookstore? or a planetarium? a movie theater, even

all of the above, and more

maybe not in that order though

the bookstore is first. you both buy each other a book you think the other will like and promise to keep each other updated on your progress

the movie theater next

speaking of movies, i saw heart eyes with my friends yesterday! it was a great movie, i enjoyed it a LOT more than i initially thought

so glad to have been proven wrong

you guys watch some good ol' romance movies (10 things i hate about you, la la land, the princess bride, etc.)

planetarium! sick as fuck

you're spending the entire day wrapped up in each other and your shared interests

some warm tea and sweet kisses for the winding down as you're watching the sunset

sigh. oh to be in love...

she isn't a kiramman today. not captain, officer, on-duty caitlyn kiramman

she's just your beloved cait, caitlyn

the headstrong, passionate, and protective woman who has your entire heart

˚ ♡ ⋆｡˚ ❀ EKKO

in an opposite direction of caitlyn's, but no less loving

money can buy certain happiness but it's not always necessary

art date where you guys stay home and paint each other with the variety of art supplies he's gathered over the years

ekko's an artist through and through

his mural of vi in the alternate universe? oh i'm in love.

the paintings are getting hung up wherever there's space on your guys' wall because the space is FILLED with posters, artwork, memorabilia, magazine and news pages, etc.

it's a very creative living space

there’s also plenty of plants that litter the windowsills and ledges where sunlight can reach

you guys spent each day of february decorating each plant with something for valentine’s day

the cranes on your ceiling has been joined by spiral hearts

interior decoration could be so romantic. i’d want to do that with someone i love someday

a little walk through the city at night too, but on the rooftops

less people to bother you guys and the aerial view makes it more thrilling

don't fall

he'll catch you regardless

˚ ♡ ⋆｡˚ ❀ JINX

you guys spend the day in her air balloon base

she's made you a gift basket!

it's filled with sketches and doodles of you

all colorful and wild and completely her style

she's stitched together a teddy bear plush too, having gone to ask vi and (reluctantly) caitlyn for help with it

you can see all the uneven bits and parts where the stuffing is too much or too little

but it's perfect

she even added a heart with her signature perfume sprayed on it too

like build-a-bear or something

funny, you also got her a gift basket

various gadgets and knick-knacks, and a new tool kit

some sweets you picked up a bakery

soft, fluffy macarons. tiramisu. a matcha strawberry cake that you share

it's a rare treat for a special occasion

cait also gave you some skincare when you went to visit her, so you and jinx had an impromptu skincare session, gossiping and talking about her latest project and relaxing together under the open night sky

[fionnaskyborn]

People like this have made me terrified that I am mischaracterizing my favorite character by playing into his strengths and emphasizing them so much... That I'm making things "too anime", "too over-the-top", and by doing that straying away from the groundedness that made the character compelling in the first place... But I think it's better to be a fan who loves someone so much they're willing to step into goofy over-the-top showcases of strength and morals out of love than being a fake fan who only ever rags on what they proclaim is so dear to them. I dunno. I don't think I'm wrong in saying that. I'm hella insecure when it comes to my own writing, especially with this guy because I want to do him as much justice as I possibly can as a writer. But I have to convince myself that it's not too much.

[guinevereslancelot]

starting to kind of date someone right before christmas is so stressful fr. do i get him a gift or what we've been on two dates but i'm seeing him tonight n it's christmas eve.....but what if he didn't get me anything then it will be weird.....

[scatteredshowersposts]

i got really mad when my wife said "i hate shion" and then "he reminds me of you" when i showed her no. 6 but recently i realized she hates the characters she has crushes on

[depresseddepot]

weird thing about me is that I am so serious about new year's resolutions that the last week of december feels like I'm in one of those "preparing for war" montages (but in a good way)

[offbookkeeping]

What's the origin of your blog title?

In the beginning of ep 271 of Off Book, Kisses to my Critics with Tim Murray, they chitchat for a minute about tour dates and live shoes and stuff and then they do a weird almost Swedish Accent and Jess goes "okay is there any other off book...keeping?" and Zach goes "I think that was the Offbookkeeping" and when I made this blog I was like oh that's such a good name. And now that's my name

OTP(s) Shipname:

I never know ship names so I'm just going to list ships. Donna and Laura from Twin Peaks, Marina and Zelda from The Magicians, Dee and The Waitress from IASIP, Mac and Dennis from IASIP, Nadja and The Guide from WWDITS, Quention and Elliot from The Magicians, Magenta and Columbia from Rocky Horror, all the jkeu couples lol, Patti Lupone x ME!!! MEEEE!!

Favourite colour:

Green (it's a sign that that question is green)

Favourite game:

I don't really play games but I played Portal once that was fun

Song stuck in your head:

Angel - Fleetwood Mac

Weirdest habit/trait?

I have to always have my hair off my neck when I'm not at school or out and about. Unless I have guests over or I need to look good my hair is in a claw clip. I sleep in a claw clip. It makes my hair curly though that's a plus

Hobbies:

Listen to & collecting music, reading, keeping a diary, blues fusion dance, organizing, watching movies, photography, writing letters

If you work, what's your profession?

Im unemployed atm but Im going to be a librarian someday

If you could have any job you wish, what would it be?

Actor. Or late night talk show host. Or archivist

Something you're good at:

Photography and gift giving. Not to aound vain but like I'm REALLY good at gift giving

Something you're bad at:

Math, cleaning, drinking a healthy amount of caffeine

Something you love:

My dog Olive

Something you could talk about for hours off the cuff:

How everything in comedy is entwined, jazz history, which muppets are my favorite, Bobs Burgers, actresses I like, just music in general, my family history, catholic saints, drag queens, Little Edie Beale

Something you hate:

the word slurry, bananas, chalkboards

Something you collect:

Vinyls, cds, teeth, deer themed stuff, leather jackets, stevie nicks merch, rosaries, Joan Didion book, art of myself

Something you forget:

What day it is! Constantly! Also what I look like

What's your love language?

Tense sapphic staring, and gifts. Also casual intimacy and like touch kind of. Like I will give a sensible kiss on the cheek and a lingering hand on a shoulder or something but that's it

Favourite movie/show:

atm my favorite movies are Clue, Grey Gardens, WWDITS, and The Royal Tenenbaums. My favorite shows are PIBE, Arrested Development, It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia, Bobs Burgers, and American Horror Story: Coven

Favorite food:

Ravioli

Favorite Animal:

Deer

What were you like as a child?

Annoyingly nerdy and ugly and precocious. Adults liked me and I NEEDED their approval

Favourite subject at school?

when I was a kid, english. Now, history

Least favourite subject:

Math and science

What's your best character trait?

I'm very thoughtful and an excellent conversationalist

What's your worst character trait?

Extremely forgetful and short tempered

If you could change any detail of your life right now, what would it be?

Ngl I'd have a different face but that's depressing

If you could travel in time, who would you like to meet?

Well... she's alive but Patti Lupone or Stevie Nicks. Otherwise, Leonard Cohen

Anyone who wants to join can! I'm too tired to go and see who hasn't been tagged

Get to know your mutuals!!!

cheers @stevie-marigold for tagging me!

What's the origin of your blog title?

doccy who! plus me mum always used to say i have telescopic arms. personally i think they're a normal length

OTP(s) Shipname:

johnlock, i will forever be a johnlocker no matter which version of those freaks we're talking about

Favourite colour:

orange <3

Favourite game:

factorio! i greatly enjoy the spagetti of it

Song stuck in your head:

antmusic by adam and the ants

Weirdest habit/trait?

darling everything i do is deeply weird, couldn't do something normal if i tried

Hobbies:

writing, reading, nuisance making, music enjoying, getting in the way, and various wool-related crafts

If you work, what's your profession?

im the imp who sits in your camera and paints the pictures for you (im out of blue btw)

If you could have any job you wish, what would it be?

id invent hexopostcards, which are hexagonal postcards and only have pictures of six sided things on. if a thing has more than six sides than you've got to have the seventh+ side(s) off the edge of the postcard. if it has less than six you have to draw where the rest of the sides could feasibly be. then id retire

Something you're good at:

answering questions truthfully

Something you're bad at:

eating dog food

Something you love:

doing jigsaws

Something you could talk about for hours off the cuff:

doccy who. i just do that anyway

Something you hate:

jigsaws that have too much sky so its all just blue (doesn't include my starry night puzzle)

Something you collect:

vinyls, posters, things ill use someday, names, ideas of things to write

Something you forget:

my best friends birthday. i have it written down and i still forget consistently

What's your love language?

circular gallifreyan

Favourite movie/show:

oh theres so many. doccy who and torchwood, sherlock, merlin (im really from a specific time going by those answers) loads of films too but, to say an obscure one to make me sound cool, mcfarland usa

Favourite food:

the souls of the damned. failing that pasta

Favourite animal:

@zelda-wheelz

What were you like as a child?

weird nervous about everything and a nerd

Favourite subject at school?

maths! don't ask me to remember a single thing from my alevels though

Least favourite subject:

drama. hated acting in front of all those eyes

What's your best character trait?

i like to think im quite nice

What's your worst character trait?

asking @zelda-wheelz the answers for half these questions

If you could change any detail of your life right now, what would it be?

id move

If you could travel in time, who would you like to meet?

george michael, so long as i can bring my mum

tagging: @captainfairygodmother @b1uetrees @by-gray

[raiiny-bay]

unfortunately i'm obsessed with project zomboid again

[izzy-b-hands]

Didn't think the 1989 version of The Woman In Black would be scarier than the one with Dan Radcliffe in it

I was Wrong flkjdsafkldsja, but I'm delighted to have been wrong. I had missed getting scared with more practical effects/careful timing of things in the background of shots appearing and disappearing, and this one scratches that itch well.

[neonacidtrip]

No joke Mycroft Holmes founded a society where you’re not allowed to talk to each other. It’s called the Diogenes Club. It’s for “unclubable men”, meaning men who abhor social interaction or are just poor at it, that normal social clubs are nightmare! So it’s a location for people to just exist in silence and not have to engage with others with no judgement. And also comfy chairs and books. There is a game room but no talking allowed. I expect the complete silence but for the clicky clacky of billiards is very appealing to people.

He lives there, at the club. He leaves for work every morning where he looks over government finances and returns in the evening to his curated sensory safe room. He’s living his best life.

My gosh, that sounds like heaven. It's like he turned a library into a club. I'm in love

[endbeginning]

and if i said.... pet.er peve.nsie.....

[whoslaurapalmer]

every fall i buy a planner for next year and first i was just buying blank notebooks and making the whole planner myself which, i super hated doing, because it just took so long. so for this year's planner i splurged on the much more disgustingly expensive (like, no one should really pay this much for a planner, BUT it saves me from doing all the work. and it's got all the space i want!) actual legit planner and have been so pleased with it i got another one for next year, and it came today and one of the design options was. hello kitty. and believe me when i say this is the sweetest fucking planner in the whole entire world she is so goddamn cute!!!!!!!