#also he's honest...
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main take aways from Halloween (1978) rewatch:
michael myers is canonically 21??? this bitch should be at the club
*sees tiddies* ***MURDEROUS RAMPAGE NOISES***
that's it that's the movie
outside of the fact that everyone who has sex is murdered by the narrative, this is a surprisingly chill portrayal of female sexuality? these teen girls are horny and actively enjoying Getting It On with their boytoys. no pushy boyfriends sneaking in through their bedroom windows--these ladies are taking the initiative to sneak out and GET SOME. one of them gets laid and then immediately orders her boyfriend to get her a beer. (yes she gets Slashered soon afterward, but so does the boyfriend so honestly, gender equality.) yes the Final Girl is the only one not having sex, but she's not bullied for that, nor are her friends slut shamed except possibly by being murdered by the narrative
actually the only character who is shown being morally condemned on-screen is michael myers. specifically FOR his violent overreaction to other people's sex lives. (people he is spying on). metaphorically, the villain is American Puritanism sticking its judgy nose into other people's business.
aka Michael Myers Is A Republican
but actually the real villain is the doctor. guy's a judgemental, shaming, pathologizing asshole. and he's been in charge of michael's care since he was SIX YEARS OLD? kid never had a chance. i'd go on a killing spree too
also the parents. where are the parents? it's halloween night and all the teenage girls are home babysitting their younger siblings? come to think of it, michael's first victim was his own older sister, whom he killed while she was babysitting him. teen girls are really shouldering a labour burden here. maybe parentification is the true villain
side note: mike commits his first murder wearing a clown costume...which is never referenced again? his 'iconic' costume is a generic mask and wig and jumpsuit, when we coulda had a Killer Clown Michael Myers??? travesty
i like how the Final Girl and her friend casually smoke weed in her car. yeah she's an honor student and her friend is the sheriff's daughter. yeah they smoke weed. so what it's 1978
(to reiterate, mike is 21 and should be at the club. im not saying he shouldn't be rampaging, im saying it's sad that he broke out, tasted freedom for the first time in his life, and immediately snuck back into his childhood home to go rampaging. let's have a remake where he goes to a nightclub and has a few beers. maybe some slutty dancing. then rampage)
oh no he's hot
#HALLOWEEN#halloween the movie#michael myers#do you think he's a mike? mikey? to his friends? if slashers had friends?#i'll be honest i was expecting this movie to be way more of a bitch to its female characters#i mean yeah they died but so did some dudes#there's just a lack of cattiness compared to the way most later movies portrayed teenage girls idk#yeah the Final Girl is a Virgin and a Bookworm. but there's no bullying or any strong sense that's she's morally superior to everyone else#mostly she AND the other girls feel a bit sorry for her lack of a social life. one even tries to set her up with a date to the school dance#solidarity! trying to get your nerd friend laid!#overall it's just teenagers being teenagers and then a slasher comes in and ruins everything with his Lack Of Chill#like yeah dude sometimes teenagers have sex. get over it#also something to be said about how while the girl who survives is the one who isn't sexually active and dresses conservatively...#ultimately those things aren't ENOUGH to prevent her from being targeted#you could say that the other girls 'provoked' the villain (the same way women irl are so often accused of provoking their attackers)#but ultimately that doesn't keep the Final Girl safe. it just delays the inevitable.#because violent men never need excuses. no matter how eager society is to provide them.#ultimately she is at the mercy of the same violent whims because it was never her behavior that invited the violence.#gendered violence doesn't need an invitation.#also she doesn't save herself the doctor saves her#it's not her actions or choices that put her in danger OR save her from it--once again it is the whim of a man#no this wasn't intended to be a feminist movie it's just fun how you could argue it that way
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Wanted to try drawing something a little ornate, I think they’d make each other worse
#myart#creepypasta#crp#jane the killer#jane arkensaw#homicidal liu#jeff the killer#liu woods#if I was Jeff I’d try to kill him too#probably got tired of getting outmogged every morning#hey guys can I be honest#did not care for this drawing#did not care for it#but I spent the time so I’ll post lol hope someone out there enjoys it!#gonna draw some chill stuff for a bit#got an itching for eyeless jack#jtk#horror#also I think Liu is so pretty here. usually I’d try to avoid that a little but idk I kinda hc he’s pretty! idgaf!#creepypasta fanart#slenderman#not ship
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I’m actually LOVING how Rick Riordan, and the other writers of the show, took his initial concept of a Percabeth rivalry fueled by that of their parents and kind of turned it on its head?
Now, instead of Annabeth being wary of Percy because he’s a son of Poseidon, he’s wary of her because she made a callous impression on him. They get off to a rocky start even before finding out who Percy’s father is, and when they finally do, Annabeth doesn’t care. Instead of them fighting because of who their parents are, they’re fighting over their own opposed worldviews.
Then, instead of them arguing over which of the gods is cooler and who was right in the story of Medusa, they realize that, just like Medusa, Annabeth is a victim of her mother and that, unlike Medusa, she is a far kinder and stronger person, unwilling to repeat the cycle of hurt. They realize that, like his father, Percy often acts without considering potential consequences and that, unlike his father, he is a far kinder and stronger person, willing to step up for someone he wronged and whom he cares about.
Instead of Percy and Annabeth’s rivalry being focused on that of their parents, it’s focused on who they are, themselves. But the path to friendship is still the same: a realization that they have each other’s backs, no matter what, because they’re not their parents after all.
#i kind of typed this in my essay voice because I knew it would be long so ignore that#also I don’t actually know which of the other writers are playing big parts in percabeth’s story so threats why I put a focus on Riordan#that’s*#aaaaanyhoo if I’m being honest I definitely prefer this version of percabeth#AND I like that Medusa said ‘‘we are not our parents until we choose to be. you three have chosen’’ implying that she thinks they’ve chosen#to be their parents only for Percy to reveal in the next episode that he’s chosen to be better than his father.#that was a really nice touch 👌👌👌#percy jackson and the olympians#pjo#pjo disney+#percy jackson disney+#percy jackson#annabeth chase#Percabeth#rick riordan#Medusa#pjo tv show#pjo tv series#pjo tv spoilers
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i think its so funny when people take the way donnie acts at face value even though its a horrible lie because he's a horrible liar, while understanding leo is bullshitting very well despite him actually being GOOD at bullshitting. many such cases
#personal#rottmnt#although tbf its probably because with leo its unpacked more thoroughly in the movie#donnie is not a morally ambiguous emotionally unavailable bad boy. he is very sensitive actually#he's a little crybaby /aff#and like this isnt hidden. he isnt SECRETLY sensitive or secretly caring its very out in the open actually#he's not hiding it well AT ALL AND THEY ALL KNOW IT LMAOOOOOOOO#i think donnie's perception of himself is somewhat earnest and somewhat. not? he DEFINITELY thinks he's more evil than he actually is#BGHFHDHGJFHG#i think what causes him to lash out and struggle to communicate is his inability to articulate his feelings#they are just too big for him. like its the exact opposite of robotic#he cant force himself to give a fuck but when he DOES its too much#so he yells and lashes out or he shuts down completely#honestly i think the perception of him being too sensitive being a problem makes way more sense than the perception of him being 'robotic'#when it comes to struggles in how his family sees him at least#even in little ways you can see him take it pretty personally when he's insulted#he struggles to blow things off#and i think it would also explain his tendency to like. visibly calm himself down when he gets upset? its a thing he does a lot in the show#he desperately wants to destroy that perception of him because he's trying so hard to close himself off#he doesn't want to be the sensitive one that cant take anything. it especially works in line with his shell#it was a big inspiration for canary continuity tbh. donnie should struggle with being the sensitive one in fic more#mikey is more empathetic and he's more emotional but donnie's quicker to feel offended or take things personally#BACKED UP HEAVILY BY CANON#that 'you can be honest with me! no hard feelings' - 'he's lyinggggggg'#like he's not upset with them babying him as much as he is with them genuinely finding it frustrating that he can fall behind like that#and just cannot take shit like that. so he tries to pull back and not seem as affected as he is#theyre a very cuddly family but mind you they can be actually mean to each other like that!!
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PART 2 OF THE WYD WHEN MY GANG PULL UP IMAGE 🗣🔥
We’re welcoming AM and HAL into the family this time c: , I’ll continue this family photo series as I release new papercrafts lol
#being completely honest with y’all I think HAL is the only guy AM would tolerate#also don’t bully Minos he wants to feel included#I’ll make a papercraft of him later too#ihnmaims#i have no mouth and i must scream#ihnmaims am#inscryption p03#edgar electric dreams#yes man fallout nv#yes man#Inscryption#ultrakill minos#minos prime#hal 9000#2001 a space odyssey
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Steddie soulmate AU where Eddie is a famous musician, everyone assumes he doesn't have a soulmate. Eddie was just smart and doesn't confirm, doesn't want to go through rabid fans who claim to be his soulmate. He's had too many show up wearing his initials they tattooed on themselves even before he was asked about soulmates in an interview.
Enter Steve Harrington who works as a nurse. Just casually on his third nightshift in a row in the ER. Sipping some coffee trying not to fall asleep when they get the call about some confidential patient coming in.
Eddie comes in for some injury. Steve has 0 clue who he is, just says "You look familiar, did we go to school together?" And Eddie practically falls off the stretcher at Steve's feet. Goes all googoo eyes at him. Steve being mildly concerned because Eddie's heart rate keeps skyrocketing (its because Steve is touching him).
One of the other nurses can't help but try and get the gossip from Steve, who is very much confused as to why she cares about this random patient. She tells Steve who Eddie is, and he's just like ???? Okay???
Steve doesn't admit it but the picture she shows is HOT. It's Eddie, flipping off the camera, tongue out. He's covered in tattoos, including the word 'sorry' written in a weird script on his middle finger. He's shirtless and his pants are so low that Steve can see the dip of his hips creating a v and-
Steve has to walk into the supply room to get himself under control. Pretends it doesn't mean anything and goes back to his job as his heart thuds rapidly in his chest.
Eddie tries not to pass out when they draw his blood, Steve holds his hand. It feels right. Eddie can't help wanting to ask," Hey, do you have a soulmate?" But he hates being asked that question, so he won't.
Until Steve bends over, his scrub top lifting up slightly. Eddie can't help glancing at his ass, but then he can't breathe. Because on his lower back is the initials EJM.
"Steve G. H?" Eddie asks as his voice goes up an octave. Steve turns, bewildered ," How did you-?" "Edward James Munson." Eddie whispers.
Oh
#Eddie uses a temporary tattoo to change the G to look like an O and the H into a weird looking R#Adds the other letters for the word Sorry and just is like cool looks good I guess#Anytime anyone asks about soulmates he just raises his finger and everyone assumes he doesn't have one and is rude#He's just being honest!! He is showing his soul mark!!#Steve is like “excuse me” goes to the bathroom used only for meltdowns and stares into the mirror#It's his third night!!His hair isn't even styled!! His scrubs have a stain on the top!! And THIS is what he looks like meeting his soulmate#Steve knows Robin is somewhere cackling at this he just knows it#Soulmate AU#Steddie#Steve Harrington x Eddie Munson#Eddie Munson x Steve Harrington#Steve Harrington/Eddie Munson#Eddie Munson/Steve Harrington#Jade is Talking#Also idk if we know their middle names but this is fanfiction I control the characters now
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momma's boy
#got emotional over how katsuki was loved from the start by everyone#and in my honest opinion i think mitsuki would be super crazy proud of her stupid son#and also would think it's so funny he looks just like her#bnha#mha#bakugou katsuki#bakugou mitsuki#fan art#becki draws stuff n stuff
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Kiss Kiss Fallen Tree!
[First] Prev <–-> Next
#poorly drawn mdzs#mdzs#wei wuxian#lan wangji#Sorry to everyone who was looking forwards to this comic only to find out I put WWX in the ugliest outfit.#Continuity came first. Plus let's be honest; he did *not* show up in anything fancy. Or in all black as seen in most fanart.#We are at the middle of WWX depression arc. His self-care was 100% because Jin Yanli would be sad if he didn't try to look nice.#Okay okay. Fine I've delayed talking about the kiss long enough.#It is absolutely a core LWJ scene over a WWX scene. Which is made even more fascinating because we don't get his POV.#But we get so many insights! His loss of control and his firmness all contrasted against how he trembles.#And all of that wrapped up in a wonderful self-loathing bow! You go Lan Zhan! You hated yourself so much for this!#WWX is a hilarious narrator for this because he is truly just...baffled by what's going on.#He would push the person away but he doesn't want to hurt their feelings or pride (putting other people first again are we?)#I do understand why this one is divisive for people though. I choose to look at it through a character/humourous lens.#I've seen people defend and admonish this scene as a particularly shitty thing LWJ did and let's be very clear here: It was.#That's why I like it. LWJ did a shitty thing and struggles with it. It's part of what makes him so robust as a character.#It's also fine if you enjoy this scene for it's eroticism. You're not a bad person for that. You are just A Person.#People will have their own experiences with this topic. Be kind to each other alright?
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Oh Mayday... Warm colors cuz he deserves some warmth 🥹
#artists on tumblr#star wars#the bad batch#star wars the bad batch#commander mayday#tbb mayday#star wars fanart#tbb#doodles#currently watching s2 to catch up tbb and just got to the mayday episode#honest reaction: MARRY ME 😩🙏💍#also why does every fictional man I love ends up dying? what kind of torture is this wtf 🧍♀️#anyway I'll pretend none of that happened#he's in Pabu at the beach#sw#sw tbb
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Been thinking about how Bill legitimately had a horrifying reason (the literal progressive disintegration of the nightmare realm that erases whatever it disintegrates from existence completely) to move himself and his crew into a new dimension. Like that's terrifying. And yet he never utilizes this to his favour. He could have been honest about this with Ford, and you KNOW as long as Bill didn't mention plans of overtaking the earth, Ford would've made the portal for him, both out of Ford's own interest and because Ford when faced with these big moral questions will pull through. But this is a card Bill NEVER plays because although he needs to leave the dimension, he cannot lose face. He can't put aside his pride and admit to the humility that he needs to flee from his dimension, that he's not actually all powerful. And so instead he pretends to be a muse and when Ford figures out something else is going on, instead of being open and humble and saying that his dimension is unravelling, Bill focuses on that he's going to over take earth, that he's actually been a monster all along, surprise Ford!
And part of it is definitely because Bill's built himself up on power and violence and to grovel and earnestly ask for help, to admit that he cannot stop the unraveling of his dimension completely invalidates that; showing vulnerability? Can't do that, even under the guise of lying to get his way. And part of it makes you wonder if it's also a form of self-sabotage, because underneath his deep denial Bill is guilty over what he occurred; he sees himself as a monster and so he'll be that monster, and having people recognize that feels good in the same way that pressing a bruise feels good. But it makes you wonder what would've happened if Bill even just was open about his dimension unravelling and had lied about overtaking the earth.
It's also interesting because although Bill has SOME charisma and can manipulate people decently well (as evidenced by his cult, and pandering to people's desires with Ford, Mabel and Blendin), he refuses to be vulnerable, refuses to not be true to his off-putting self, even when if he was just vulnerable of pretended to not be himself, to put aside the (false) pride he has in himself he would've gotten a portal by now. and part of me wonders if it's because it's this false pride that built on insecurity and denial on who he is he cannot drop that mask.
Further thoughts on this!
#hugin rambles#hugin rambles gf#uhhhh yeah anyways Bills a delightfully complex character#and I think thats why also Bill fell hard for Ford is because Ford was vulnerable with Bill and actually CARED for Bill and got to peer#into the vulnerable bits of Bill and cared for him#but yeah fascinating. rotating him in my head whooo#bill cipher#billford#the book of bill#TBOB#gravity falls#but seriously the idea of Bill becoming honest with Ford instead of being like HAHA I TRICKED YOU bounces around the ol noodle with vigor#like dude thats a HUGELY typical self sabotage thing. like why YES im what people think i am.#hes interesting because hes good at manipulation. but also at the same time bad at it because he refuses to not be himself.#which... yanno i can respect. truth to being yourself even if thats offputting and annoying. but certainly makes it more difficult#re: manipulation. and then there was ford who was just. really into Bill in entirety#congrats! you guys match each others freak and toxic neediness to the t#gravity falls meta
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"I think youll find Im universally recognised as a mature and responsible adult."
"Its just a lot of wavy lines"
"Yeah, shorted out. Finally, a lie too big. "
#doctor who#doctor who fanart#dr who fanart#11th doctor#eleventh doctor#matt smith#dr who#hes just a little silly#also by far one of the darkest docs if im being honest#and the scariest cause he looks like a puppy in a fez but WILL tear you apart#dont pretend we forgot colonel runaway#whovian terrytory#terryholdsapencil
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Scholarly peak is catching up on recent literature
#bingqiu#shen qingqiu#luo binghe#svsss#sqq#lbh#my art#which is honestly just to say that i've finished the other two print books i was reading#and am now prepared to leap feet first into svsss bk4#i succeeded in holding off for an entire two weeks. i have the conviction of a wet paper towel.#lets see bk4 was described as - what? - an ''angst and smut pile''??#i am very much looking forward to this#i was promised a story with my snake boy#because i am very much not over zhuzhi-lang's fate so this had better be A REALLY NICE HAPPY ONE FOLKS#anyway have sqq and lbh cuddling and reading as i project on them#i like to assume that as time goes on sqq is able to relax his persona a bit more around lbh#i think he should get to cuddle and bitch about shitty novels#but man sqh is really the ONLY source of any books that have an even slightly modern cadence/style i have a feeling sqq would be very keen#though if i'm being honest i really wonder if sqh could ever bring himself to write fiction again#if you're A Writer it tends to be hard to RESIST you just get an itch to tell a story#but also like... the fear that all of this could happen again... or that the characters you're creating might be REAL and SUFFERING...#yeah... i honestly suspect he can't write anymore and that it honestly probably sucks a lot... but for the sake of this joke he is :P
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So like. Did anyone else notice that Jayce doesn't immediately shoot Viktor? He only powers his hammer on AFTER Viktor has opened his eyes. Below is Jayce's reaction to seeing Viktor (his Viktor, from his universe, not the future version of him) for the first time after walking into the dome. For the first time in months. That's like. A look of wonder. Almost reverence.
Assuming the Jinx/Rictus/Vander fight is cut to real-time after Jayce has gone into the dome, he's staring at Viktor for like. 5 minutes.
My interpretation here, of Jayce's expression just before Viktor finally opens his eyes to see Jayce in the room with him, he's committing Viktor to memory, before he has to kill him.
Edit: I almost missed it but like. HE IS SMILING For like 2 frames it's an outright smile. He leans in towards him, too. I cannot handle this.
#Arcane Spoilers#jayvik#arcane#arcane season 2#Jayce Talis#Viktor Arcane#arcane analysis#ok not quite 5 minutes but like 3 minutes#the first glance is like almost a smile? he wants to be happy to see him#He doesn't want to kill him#But he's seen the horrors this will lead to so he has to#And potentially Future!Vik is controlling him to some extent?#At least that's what this universe's Viktor sensed I guess with Jayce's interaction with Salo#But like. Let's be honest#Salo has a VERY punchable face#Jayce just got to whack-a-mole his ass#GOD every frame of this show is a work of art#It's so fucking good#Also not me finishing out the episode even though I was just looking for Jayvik screenshots#Because Isha's final sequence with her memories with Jinx is so heart-wrenchingly beautiful#I've seen it so many times but it never fails to make me cry#Nabexis thinks
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Ooh, now that we’ve seen N!Edwin and DP!Edwin talk about Feelings could we see the same with N!Charles and DP!Charles?
As simple as that.
Edwins version
ko-fi
#ask ask ask#dead boy detectives#dbda#payneland#edwin x charles#doom patrol#dead patrol#oof man i was not made to write serious conversations#is this healthy? who the hell knows#but is it true to charles' character?#well i sure hope so!#in dp!charles mind#his whole reason for staying has always been edwin#if he gets to do stay with him#it'll be great no matter what form their relationship takes#if edwin loves him in a romantic way? hell yeah! then they can be even closer!#he is thinking in an 'I am his already since the day he found me' sort of way#and to be honest I think dbd!charles agrees#but he also knows he is a people pleaser so he doesn't want to just go and say yes to edwin to make him happy#without being sure he will be able to keep saying yes forever#dp!charles doesn't have this conflict because i genuinely don't think he's picturing forever#he's not as confident in their ability to outrun Death indefinitely#but that allows him to understand more clearly what he's feeling now!#I have thoughts about these boys as you can see
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Vampire? In Gotham! (part 1)
Summary: Danny's 19, a prince, a halfa, and tired of being these things. So he jumps on the idea of a vacation as soon he's given the hint of a chance. The only caveat is that he's going to go undercover as a vampire in a big city - Gotham - far from his home dimension. He finds it's easier than he thought it would be. He's already mostly there.
Relationships: Dead on Main (Jason Todd/Danny Fenton), John Constantine & Danny Fenton
Um? Inspired by several prompts and other fanfics. Lost Between Our Needs and Wants AU definitely, with a background Danny's summoned by Ra's as Damian as a sacrifice. Nothing bad happens (to Damian) don't worry. Also, the one in which Danny decided to fight ghosts as a human too.
And John is almost definitely ooc, he's a character I enjoy a lot even though I don't have a firm grasp of his canon.
Danny's afterlife has been way too interesting for way too long. It's gotten to the point that when things suddenly go quiet for months, he hardly hesitates to give his "human" life some over-due attention.
For obvious reasons he's not going to try his "vacation" in his own dimension. Anyone he once might have stayed for know how to get a hold of him, whenever and wherever.
The Amity Park portal is still open. But between the stricter laws on ghosts wanting to use permanent portals he managed to get passed, and the increasingly feral ways the townsfolk have begun defending each other with, Danny feels confident to finally...let go. In his heart, he had always thought of it as still his, despite not being there to maintain it in truth. But now it's not his Haunt anymore, fully and completely.
They don't need him anymore.
And Danny doesn't want to be needed like that again, to be honest. He sacrificed so much to play hero because he got it into his head that he had to do everything alone in the end. As if he was the only one who could kick ghost butt on the daily in town.
Thankfully, a nineteen year old Danny is smarter than a fourteen year old Danny. He's learned the art of delegation. Any tasks that he doesn't need to be present for, he has a whole team of ghostly assistants to handle things for him. The major multidimensional crises have for the most part been solved - his protection Obsession at the very least fed. And quite a few skeleton thralls he freed near the beginning of his reign were suddenly looking for direction. Among them, a decent amount found the talent and fulfillment in positions of bureaucratic power that Danny never will, filling up spots he's unwilling to give out like the candy the various ghosts of nobility treat the roles as. Or ghost nobility. Like the Ancients. Quite a few of the Ancients are assholes.
(At least all the murderous Ancients aren't problems anymore)
With all their help, he's able to occasionally pop in to do paperwork, meet with the High Court for various lawmaking and judicial decisions, and listening to official petitions to the Crown from his people. It's all good. No mountains of unseen paperwork, no audience with the Observants every waking moment, no one across the Realms screaming desperately for help. Even some of the cults have finally caught on that he's not Pariah!
So Danny starts the process of finding a new Haunt for his new, normal, alive alter ego. Staying as long as he has in the Realms couldn't have been sustainable long-term if he didn't want to become a full ghost. As complicated as his relationship with his humanity is these days, he still doesn't want to die again. And Frostbite definitely has been pushing him to finding new territory, in the Infinite Realms or otherwise. Because even for full ghosts going Hauntless for long periods is straining. To say the least.
Although, being just a human again...didn't sit right. Even after all this time. His human form is still one Danny Fenton, in his eyes.
He can never be Danny Fenton again. He accepted that his duties as Crown Prince would keep him away from the identity of the ghost hunter's ghost hunting son, who went to Casper high and had terrible grades in everything but science; the kid who was shoved into lockers and who was addicted to Nasty Burger and played DOOMED with his friends and who wanted to be an astronaut. He accepted that he had to leave that all behind, and be full ghost in all but form. His parents wouldn't want him if they knew everything he lied about, anyways. He didn't actually deserve the name Fenton.
His new Haunt would preferably be in a place where he could reasonably pass himself off as another species, then, and still be safe. Safer than being a ghost at least. Most universes had well-deserved folklore against the Realms. His people are not inherently malevolent...But he knows that they don't play nice and careful with the living.
He would need an ectoplasm rich environment, too. A big city with lots of crime would go a long way for providing the ambient death and fear vibes that would attract Blobs like a bee to nectar. It would also make it feel like the Infinite Realms - hopefully. He's gotten accustomed to that kind of environment. He thinks he may never sleep again in a place quiet and safe.
He'd like a place with a rich history too. Just for fun!
Danny mulls it over carefully, narrowing down universes he could reasonably start his search in. The only universe he can think of with extensive protections for the non-human written into law is one far-flung flavor of an Earth he's semi-familiar with. He's been there twice, both at 16, just starting out and stressed to hell and back with the sheer load of unattended problems Pariah left to rot.
Both times he'd been more than he'd have liked. One Ra's Al Ghul wasn't technically his problem. He was no one's problem now, and that was current Danny's whole issue with it.
John Constantine is an unlamented saint for putting up with a feral teenaged Danny's slap dash attempt at helping the both of them - John with his soul related doom, and Danny with his paperwork related misery.
But. Considering how he handled the contract with Al Ghul, Danny can't blame John for hesitating to renegotiate their terms already. Ra's Al Ghul was an idiot who gave him what he thought was the life of his grandson, in exchange for immortality.
Him. The Prince of the Dead. Immortality.
Thankfully, the wording was imprecise. What he actually traded was the kid's really cool sword - the kid kneeling, terrified eyes meeting his before darting away, offering his own sword to let Danny slit his throat and "collect his due sacrifice", Danny not being able to breathe through his own fear - for pure ectoplasm, with instruction to drink it everyday until he ran out.
This of course killed even him months later from over-exposure.
The man probably felt a mile high in the air, indestructible, right up until he crashed. Al Ghul promptly became a ghost. Which. Closest thing to true immortality the Prince of the Dead could offer him. He kept his end of the deal. It's not his fault that Al Ghul never specified that he didn't want to die to be immortal. It's also not his fault that Al Ghul had so many dead enemies and victims on the other side who were easy to find. It was ridiculously easy - they made a support group around being taken down by the LOA. And who was he to deny the dead their due vengeance?
Right. So John is understandably nervous about Danny owning all the pieces of his soul, no matter how much rapport they've built these past three years. Danny is mature enough to admit that it is his fault for that bit.
On the bright side for Danny, that means one grumpy occult detective in a sad trenchcoat is a guy who lives in his phone. Like an uncle-shaped tamagachi!
He scrolls though his contact list until he thumbs John's number. Surprisingly, instead of going to voicemail, he picks up on the first ring.
"Before you ask, yes I'm cashing in a favor, finally. No, it's nothing evil, I've just got the first actual free time I've had in five years and I'd like to get suggestions on a city to move to."
-------------------
John ended up giving a very detailed list in response. Suspiciously detailed, and hardly prompted. How long had John been thinking on this? And why?
Danny chalked it up to the man's reasonable paranoia when it came to him. John's aware he can pretend to be (fully) human with relative ease, afterall. And the older man knows where he'd need to be able to actually live long term. After-live. Whatever. Point is, John probably made it his business to know where any sneaky invasions would start if Danny ever became a little less morally ambiguous and a little more bloodthirsty.
Entirely fair! Pariah wasn't always a tyrant!
On the very top was Gotham, a city in this world's Jersey, and the crime capitol of the States. Plenty of ambient ectoplasm, and planty of charged emotions wafting from every street corner. He doesn't voice this, but Danny figures that there must be a whole community of ghosts already living there because of that double whammy.
Something about the city's name tickles his memory, but can't quite pin it down. If it was important he'd have remembered. Right?
John is thrown when he asks about his options of other non-humans Danny could reasonably get away with impersonating.
"And why," the occultist half-accuses, "would you of all spooks, want to live in Gotham, as a 'vacation', just to not even pretend to be normal?"
"First of all, ow. John you know just because someone is different doesn't mean they're not normal. I thought you were the cool uncle." He responds half-heartedly. Danny bites his bottom lip, rolling it between his sharp teeth as he tries to think of a part two to that answer that wouldn't get uncomfortably personal.
John doesn't rise to his bait. Danny hears him unscrew something metallic, then the sound of fluid swishing quietly from the other end. Ah.
The silence wears on. Danny should hang up. But winging things have always gotten him into bigger trouble. And John is the guy to call for this. Fuck. And he's bad at lying bold-faced.
Fine.
"I'm half human," Danny responds as if that would explain everything. It doesn't, so he manages to continue in a small voice that he doesn't even remember the last time he'd used. "Sometimes I still pretend to be one when I can't see any other way. But I had my chance at playing the part of both. And I royally screwed it up, literally! I became freaking royalty and I just couldn't anymore. As far as anyone but my doctor is concerned, I'm full ghost. I had a chance - I don't deserve another one. Screw ups don't get nice things."
John takes another swig from his flask, mutters something under his breath that sounds vaguely like 'of course he's a fecking halfa'. His voice is rough around the edges from whatever cheap booze he just drank a concerning amount of.
"Listen. Sounds like you've got trauma dripping from your ears, kid. But what's the point here, huh? Sounds like you want to be human without all the fuss of it." John drawls out.
Danny takes a deep breath in through his nose. He tries to fight down the feeling of being peeled open for the world to see - being afraid isn't helpful right now. He needs to be silly, nonchalant, like he's always been with John in tense situations. Why do they only talk when things are tense, anyways?
"Essentially. It's more like. I want to have all the human experiences I missed out on, but without having to hide being inhuman. That kinda thing."
"And you can't just be a ghost?"
"I really don't think anyone likes being ghosted."
"Don't you start on that. You know what I mean, Princeling."
"Fine. No, I can't be a ghost. That's boring and no one likes being haunted."
John gives a long sigh. After a beat, he acquiesces. "Alright. You could pull off vamps damn well. Got the hair for 'em. The teeth and claws are only slightly off. There's several clans with different looks the same way humans have ethnicities. Although, I don't think that's the same, now that I'm thinking about it. But subspecies doesn't fit either."
Danny hums, tilting his head in thought. "Like the difference between a banshee and a specter?"
"Yeah, like that. All vamps, just different enough, and no kind older than another to say they're the 'main' species." John clarifies. Another pause. "Unless you count Halfas. Which. Some people do but shouldn't. Bloody idiots."
Danny startles, nearly dropping his phone. "Excuse me?"
John snorts. "What? You didn't know?"
"Musta missed that part in the complimentary instruction manual they gave me for having my molecules redecorated." He snarks. "What do you mean I'm already a vampire?"
"I said people who don't know what they're talking about count Halfas as the original vampires. You lot have been around since the bloody dawn of time, it seems." John sounds exasperated.
"That's not what I - never have I ever wanted to take a chomp on anyone's pulse point, what the fuck?"
John gets that smug tone in his voice that Danny has a love-hate relationship with. "And exactly how many undead folks do you hang out with when you're feeling peckish?"
"...you can't be serious." Danny says instead of denying him. What can he even say to that? He's never met a Revenant or Ghoul.
"As the grave, I'm afraid."
When Danny doesn't outwardly respond for too many beats, John takes another chug. "Phantom?"
"John." He begins, pinching the bridge of his nose as more and more dots connect too cleanly for him. "You might be wrong."
"...What awful lore about your eldritch homeland is going to send me into my weekly crisis this time?" The detective groans out.
"Alright. So you know how part of my whole thing as the Prince makes it my job to stay aware of ectoplasmic diseases?"
John hums in acknowledgement, so Danny sucks in a deep breath. "Then you should know two things. One, that I've been to a few dimensions with vampires in them. And like you said, they're all different from each other. I didn't really pay much attention beyond helping the people survive these world-ending scenarios though.
Two, is that in each and every one of those realities, the vampirism was caused by a virus made by an Ancient - don't worry, they're gone. The disease itself is called False Halfa Syndrome. It was their attempt to weaponize Halfas back in Pariah's time."
"Oh shite." John says elegantly. "Bag o' shite!"
"Good luck on that crisis. Me too." Danny is hardly holding in hysterical laughter. "I can't believe Sam and Tucker were right about this. Holy shit."
"How in the world didn't you piece this together until now?!"
"I don't know! I just thought it was coincidence!"
"Bloody fucking hell, Phantom. Nevermind. You can play a vampire totally accurately because you are one. A ghost one." John growls. "Cause that just had to be a thing."
Danny carefully doesn't think about how Vlad might have legitimate claim to that vampiric aesthetic he's got going on. Instead, he's planning on stealing an aesthetic change for his own ruse.
"Nice. Should I know anything else while we're here?" He asks.
John gave a wry laugh, crackling over the phone's shitty old speakers. "About Gotham or your new undead existence?"
"Both." He says instantly. "Both is good."
"Gotham has vigilantes. The birds and bats are efficient, and they spook easy at unknowns. Batman's technically my coworker if we're gonna call the Justice League a job - we don't get paid for this. He and his family deal with the craziest lineup of human rogues I've ever had the displeasure. It's made him a healthy amount of paranoid. If you're doing anything nefarious, he'll find you. And then he'll call me."
Danny isn't exactly afraid of John. But Pariah wasn't afraid of Danny, either, so the halfa takes it seriously. Internally.
"Yeah yeah old man. You've got your eye on me and all that. Uh huh." He genuinely appreciates the warning, too, but messing with John is his bread and butter.
"Watch it, brat," John says with no real venom, unlike a moment ago. "Or I'll bring out the stakes."
"I take mine medium rare, thank you."
"Piss off."
"...About the vampirism?"
"Normal ghost bullshite applies. It's about the ecto, I think. You go absolutely nutters for the stuff in undead folk. Something about how ectoplasm interacts with the reanimated. Liminals are nutritious too, but I've been told it's the difference between cafeteria food and gourmet. One smells absolutely heavenly, the other is barely appetizing."
Oh Ancients is that why all his exes are Liminal? No, hold on, was part of the reason Vlad was so weird about him just ghost-vamp on ghost-vamp mutual hanger?
"What, I'm not the only Halfa in your life? John. I thought we had something special."
"Please don't make this weird. Do not flirt with me." John instantly scolds. "I know you're just being your little weird brand of playful, but I knew you when you were a kid shaped menace. C'mon."
Danny blinks. He didn't think he was flirting, but apparently he was. "Alright. Sorry, John."
There's a sudden crash on the other side of the phone. Followed by John's muffled cursing.
"Listen, I have to go. If you're serious about this I'll get you some good fakes. Text me with what you'd like your name to be." And then John hangs up. Danny smiles into the lingering silence.
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PhantomMenace: Dante Nightingale, pwetty please 0w0
God's Favorite Whore: That's the most main character name I've ever bloody seen.
God's Favorite Whore: You're from a dead family in Illinois, farm boy, meta. Had an accident at 14, with a near death experience for believability. You've also been missing since shortly after it. Anyone looking into you will think that's when you got "turned."
PhantomMenace: thats why your the cool uncle <3
God's Favorite Whore: This should count as another favor, don't you think?
PhantomMenace: Yup. I'll be nice
PhantomMenace: 💚 ~2/20 Favors until Soul Return~ 💚
#dp x dc crossover#danny phantom#dp x dc au#vampire danny au#ghost prince Danny#Uncle John Constantine#inspired by lost between our needs and wants#Halfa Danny Fenton#Halfas are vampires au#dead on main#dead ra's al Ghul#feral Danny#lets be honest here#he's so smart but he can be so dumb#not shown here is vlad rotting in ghost jail#for 1000 years haha#jazz and ellie are also halfas#sam is a witch#and tucker got zapped with a magic werewolf beam#batman vs. dracula universe
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Duke Thomas Being Rude and A Hater
Role Call (Batman & The Signal TPB)
We Are Robin #1 & 2
Robin War (yes he's speaking to Damian in that bottom panel. The brothers of all time)
Batman (2011) #47
Batman & the Outsiders (2019)
#duke thomas#the signal#batman#almost all of these being people he cares about#being rude is his love language#if duke isn't being rude and honest to a fault and yelling at bruce for being selfish is he really duke at all#also how duke's blunt honesty is a direct and deliberate contrast to dick's constant performance#think about it. their first interaction is duke being like 'what's your name' and dick dodging the question#but then duke's like 'i knew all along dick' - and it's this act of seeing through dick's performance that makes dick select him as robin#okay derailing once again because of dick and duke... when will dc see my vision and let them interact!!
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