#also first time writing Zenos hope it all worked out

[voidedleylines]

FFXIVWrite 2023 Day 5: Barbarous

Welllll this one got a way from me a little bit lol. Finally had the inspo to focus on my girl and i. Gave her a real bad dream lmao. Zenos & WoL focus. Allusions to Hien/WoL

Enjoy?

Rating: T+ CWs: violence, character death

She misses sleeping. It’s not something that comes easy to her as of late. Her head feels like it’s filled with lead and it hurts to move it around too much. It’s a humid day in her room at the pendants and the beads of sweat accumulating on her forehead and rolling down her neck don’t help her need for sleep.

She crawls out of bed and walks to where there’s a pitcher full of cool water at the table and splashes it on her face, soaking her clothes in the process. She’s too tired to care about the mess as she wanders back over to the mattress and lays down again. Her heart beats loudly in her ears and her jaw aches with how hard she’s biting it closed. “Please,” she whispers, “Not tonight.”

Whatever god she was praying to, it was obvious they weren’t listening as she sees herself in the same venue as before. He’s waiting with open arms, a smirk dripping from his face. “Ah! My friend you’ve finally come,” he says. As she always does, she stays silent.

Zenos’ face falters only just as he lets out a hum, “Very well. I see you still play the role of the stoic hero,” he walks towards her and his eyes linger on her up and down. A rage begins to bubble in her gut. “But as I say again and again you don’t have to take that facade with me. Lest you forget I am the only one who knows you. The real you.”

The venue changes and she’s back in her village, up in the mountains of Southern Thanalan. The smell of sulfur hits her in a wave that makes her cough. She sees herself, small and dirty, barely five summers old. She hears whispers from the room outside. Voices she barely recognizes. Her mother and father.

“We have to leave this place,” her mother begs, “It’s not safe here. No one cares or listens to me. We have to go.”

“It’s not that simple-” her father begins.

“The hells it isn’t. I don’t want to be around that thing. Don’t want to be killed in my sleep by it one day.”

The other voice is quiet. Freyalin stares at the small child as she sleeps. Her face twists in discomfort. Hands glow red for the briefest of seconds. She looks down and sees her own doing the same. She hides it behind her back. “Alright,” her father says, “We’ll leave tomorrow.”

The scene shifts again and Zenos laughs from behind her, her spine tingles with his breath.

“Get out of my head,” she growls. He responds with more laughter.

She’s still home in her village, only now a friend is dead in front of her. She chased after a voidsent too powerful and something happened. She stopped in the middle of a cast. Light blinded her, head pounded. She saw a vision of another voidgate close by, people slaughtered. There wasn’t anything she could do for them though so why watch in fear. When she came to, she was too late. Her squadron around her cried out in confusion, asking why she stopped, why she left him defenseless. She couldn’t answer. Her hand turned red than black until the light dripped from between her fingers.

“It was the Echo,” she whispers. Again Zenos laughs with such sincerity she turns and swings a punch at where she thinks he is, but he’s gone.

“Now now adventurer. That’s no way to treat a friend. An equal,” he says.

It feels like there should be blood pouring out of her mouth when she speaks, “we are not equal,” she says.

The scene splits into two now. A side by side. Zenos rips through soldiers on a battlefield. The smell of hot blood hits her nose. She winces. The other shows herself fighting through many different scenes so far. Preatorium. Doma castle. The Ghimlyt Dark. Her movements match his, they’re just holding different weapons.

The scenes merge into one. Her blood runs cold. It's one she's never seen before

Hien stands before her. Before him. That scene when Elidibus still took his body, though this time it's her inside. “Zenos,” she tries to scream but he's not listening.

His arm moves, readying his sword, she's helpless to try and fight him. She's trapped in the motions as they fight Hien blow for blow.

“Freyalin will be here soon my lord,” Yugiri calls out from somewhere beyond her current tunnel vision. Zenos’ laugh rings loud around her. She feels every vibration.

Steel meets steel and faulty ground twists Hien’s ankle and he screams out as he falls to the ground.

She looks down at him as his chest rises and falls. She watches in horror as her arm rises and places the sword on his chest.

Directly above his heart.

“Zenos,” Freyalin cries out again, “You can't win this. This will not break me.”

Again all he does is laugh, deep and long, “I’m not looking to break you, my friend, that was never my intention,” he says. Weight is put on the sword. Hien’s face is stoic and his jaw is set; but his eyes shine with tears. Show how he’s scared. “I’m looking to see how long I have until you realize how meant to be we are. As equals,” he presses down, breaking skin, “as partners.”

She's too slow to react as the blade cuts through Hien. She feels every thrust and twist of it. Her eyesight goes blurry, her head fuzzy. Hien chokes out his last breath before his green eyes go lifeless.

She feels numb.

The scenes shifts one last time and the two of them stand in a dark space, a void with no light. He is smiling at her. She is standing tall across from him. After a moment he turns away. “Until next time, adventurer,” he says. He walks on, the echoes of his footsteps the only sound.

She wakes in a pool of her own sweat and her throat sore from screaming. She quickly flicks her hand to light the candles near her bed. Her chest feels heavy and she takes deep breaths in and out. There's a knock on her door, now doubt the manager or a concerned neighbor coming to check on her. She doesn't answer. She stays up the rest of the night, a low fire burning in her chest.

In the corner of the room a sad soul watches over her, wishing there was something he could do to help.

[mothwingwritings]

Dreaming Of World's End

Reader X Zenos Yae Galvus

Waaah it has been so long!!! I apologize for the absence! I have been working on and doing all kinds of stuff (fics included) as of late so I did one of my classic dip outs there for a moment, but I’m here! Just plunking away as usual. :)

With Dawntrail coming up I have been focusing a big chunk of my free time on trying to beat Endwalker (I am slow in all things, video games included lul) because I wanna be there with the herd with Dawntrail comes out!!! I have no idea if I am gonna make it, but I am doing the best I can to catch up!!!

That being said: Zenos brainrot propelled this fic from my brain, to my computer, to you. Was I and am I also writing a bunch of other things? Yes. Is this the only thing I could momentarily focus on writing-wise because I have been compromised by my love for this fucked up man? Also yes. I’m sorry. It’s bad. I was already obsessed with him in Stormblood and now that I am deep within the clutches of the Endwalker msq… It’s over for me guys. It was a good run, but rip to me. My WOL may be playing hard to get, but I’m sure not. Zenos if you are reading this, you can just have me.

So without further ado, here is a Zenos fic I have been working on! My love for him aside, I think Zenos is a super fun character to write for, so I really hope I did him some justice! This is a reader insert fic, but you are the Warrior of Light in it so feel free to insert your OC’s and WOL if you like! I tried to keep the reader neutral, but I will say it’s def aimed more at a female reader/character and if you are a shorter race like a Lala it will probs be a little wonky, so my apologies. Also, I am about half way? A little over half way? through the Endwalker main story, so potential spoilers up to that point. This fic takes place sometime between post Shadowbringers and the first part of Endwalker.

Nothing overly explicit, but due to the nature of this fic it is 18+ please!

Thank you so much for reading!!! <3 I truly hope you enjoyed!

WARNINGS: Unhealthy relationship (if you can even call it a relationship), intense infatuation, implied noncon, noncon mentions,  a lot of fighting and mentions of fighting, mentions of death and the end of the world, unwanted touching, Endwalker spoilers.

It was always the same dream.

Amaurot. The end times. Death, destruction, chaos. Streets tainted by endless misery, stifling woe permeating the air as people ran about frantically, picked off left and right by horrendous, nightmarish monsters. Screams pierced the air as the remaining survivors struggled in vain, desperate to escape a fate that they could not avoid.

Just as any other night, he would watch it all unfold with cold indifference. Walking through the crumbling, fire charred lanes of this shell of a once bustling city, he would take it all in at a leisurely pace, maintaining a stride no more rushed than if he were taking a pleasant stroll. His features would be void of distress or malaise, his face a blank slate as he paraded down roads lined with bodies and devastation.

Zenos could say it was because he had grown accustomed to it, have the same dream each night and the grisly scenario that laid in wait past your closed eyes was bound to no longer shock you. But that would be a lie, as this ghastly nightmare had never truthfully bothered him to begin with. He simply didn’t care, not about the dying planet, nor its inhabitants that suffered the same fate. This scene from another time, this moment from a faraway place that no longer existed, he couldn’t bring himself to feel any form of remorse for the phantoms left to wallow helplessly in this endless, hellish loop, even if his own star was on track to share the same fate.

An echo of the past was just that, to dwell on it was a fool’s errand.

But tonight, it was not the end of times that greeted him when he closed his eyes. In its place stood an immaculate hall appearing to belong to some manner of grandiose castle. Pristine and orderly, he sat upon a large throne questionably positioned in the middle of the walkway, facing so that a vast expanse of the hall was clearly within his view.

Had he been here before? It was hard to say, having been trapped by palace walls most of his life they all blurred together after a certain point. Perhaps this wasn’t even a castle, but some manner of fortress. The varying weapons displayed neatly along the surrounding walls certainly made it feel as if this was more than just a mere abode for royalty to live out their boringly opulent lives, perhaps it doubled as an armory of sorts? Every sword, spear, and battle axe looked immaculately cared for; their blades so sharp simply looking at them made you feel as if you had been sliced.

His time to dwell upon the mystery of his surroundings was quick to dissipate however, as he felt a familiar presence approach him from behind. He remained still when a delicate hand was placed upon him, crawling from his arm to slide unhurriedly across his broad shoulders. The caress occupied the entirety of his thoughts, manicured nails scratching lightly against his flesh as they raked across his back, pressing just hard enough that they left a pleasant burn in their wake.

“There you are,” a deceptively alluring voice purred in his ear. Phantom arms draped themselves loosely over his shoulders, their fingers moving to trace a swirling pattern upon his chest. Goosebumps littered his arms at the brief contact. “Were you hiding from me?”

A small smile spread across his lips. What elation merely hearing your voice caused.

Were he not already aware of it, he would recognize he was in a dream from this interaction alone. You, only you, would be welcomed to touch him this way. But even were he to offer invitation, you would never do so of your own free will. There was a mixture of pride and revulsion that kept your interactions with him void of skinship, save for the fleeting contact that occurred when you were locked in combat.

His motivations, the way he chose to experience the world, your differing values and opinions. Like night and day, they barred you from reciprocating his feelings towards you. Because of this, he was left to revel in your touch exclusively in the realm of dreams.

“On the contrary,” he hummed, “you have been the one to keep me waiting.”

A low chuckle reverberated from your chest, sending a shiver down his spine. You rose to your full height, pulling away slowly until you disconnected from him completely. Even if the contact was nothing more than an attempt at provocation, he missed your touch the moment you detached yourself.

“Well then I hope you can find it in your heart to forgive me, my lord,” you enunciated his title tauntingly, the playful lilt in your voice exciting him further. He heard you take several languid steps away from him before you spoke once more. “That is, if you even have a heart that can offer forgiveness.”

Zenos rose to his feet, turning to finally face you. Your back greeted him as you stared up at the myriad of weaponry covering the back wall, the hand that was moments ago atop his chest now gracefully running across the hilt of a long sword. Your fingers lingered on the handle, moving as if you were going to grip it, but never completing the task.

Zenos smiled. You were toying with him.

“You jest,” he spoke, taking a measured step your way, “if anyone has intimate knowledge of the existence of my heart and whom it beats for, it is you.”

Your posture stiffened in acknowledgment of the insinuation, yet you refused to turn his way.

“Is that so,” your voice seemed distant, as if you were unwilling to accept the burden of the intense desire he held for you, “Forgive me, I must have misread the situation. Due to the nature of how our meetings always end, I figured you only ever wanted one thing from me, and that is my blood.”

A low chuckle rumbled from within him, his eyes crinkling in amusement. For all that you were, all the skills and knowledge that you held, you could certainly be dense.

“I desire all you have to offer,” he answered plainly, “Your fury and malice, your rage and rancor, your disdain and desire,” he continued to approach you, each step slow and deliberate as he closed in on your staunch form. “Your love and affection are no different. I want to consume your every thought, just as you consume mine. I want you to taste me in the air you breathe and feel me crawling under your skin, even when I am far removed from your presence.”

He stopped several steps away from you, keeping his distance but lingering close enough that it bordered on intrusive. He raised his hand calmly, reaching out to grab a stray lock of your hair between his fingers. He gingerly caressed the silky strands, smirking when he noted that even such slight contact caused a shudder to lurch your otherwise statuesque form.

“You can play the fool all you want, but you cannot hide the fact that the same beast that dwells in me is also within you. They call out, craving each other to the point of madness.  We need each other. This dance we share must continue in perpetuity, lest our fierce yearning for each other’s presence turn us to savages incapable of rational thought, driven to the point of committing mass, undiscriminating destruction as a means to appease ourselves.”

He smirked, placing a gentle kiss atop the tendrils in his hand, before letting it slip from his grasp completely. “And you would do anything to divert that misfortune, would you not hero?”

Your shoulders began to quiver, shaken by the threat of violence he could and would commit simply to be by your side.  An impatient sigh escaped his lips, “So come, what better way is there to quench each other’s thirst and prevent calamity than through a mutually beneficial rendezvous? Surely even someone as set in their way as you are is in agreeance.”

“I was under the assumption that you planned on battling me until the world was torn asunder, regardless of if I entertain your perversions or not,” Your voice dripped with disdain as you spat your response at him, “If that is the case, pray tell why I should not cut you down where you stand? Why must the dance continue if the outcome is all the same?”

Your words made the smile on his face grow, stretching his lips to an unnatural degree. Taking another step forward, he leaned in until his mouth grazing the shell of your ear. Placing his hands firmly atop your shoulders, he gave a tight squeeze as he responded.

“Because we share one destiny,” he pressed his cheek flush against your head, inhaling deeply before releasing it in a slow, shaky sigh, “even now as you try so hard to deny me, our fate is intertwined, my warrior. You cannot escape me, and I have no desire to escape you. The dismantling of this world as a result of our conquest is all but inevitable and I welcome it with open arms.”

“I won’t let the world crumble to ash.” Your bold declaration was spoken as if it were fact, the conviction in your voice sending a surge of wanton excitement coursing through his veins. “Say and do as you like, the future you seek will never come to pass.”

Oh, how he adored you.

“Hmm,” he hummed, “You can try and stop me, but you cannot escape what has been predestined.”

During the course of the conversation, your hand had had traveled to the base of an axe, your fingers wrapping around it to grasp the handle in a constricting hold. All of the anger that had been bubbling up reflected in the whites of your knuckles, the tremor of your hand becoming more apparent as your composure slipped further and further. The cool demeanor you initially donned had completely shifted, overridden by the immense agitation his presence was inviting.

The axe was ripped swiftly from the wall, lacking fluidity. There was no care for keeping the wall in tact or making sure all the other weapons that surrounded it stayed in their spot. You ripped it down with one great tug, bits of stone and surrounding armaments clattering noisily into a massive steel heap on the ground as you finally spun around to face him. Zenos had seconds to react as you swung down in a wide arc, the finely sharpened blade slicing easily through the decorative tiling that coated the floor, decimating the ground where he once stood.

“There we are,” Zenos growled in anticipation, sizing you up with a bloodthirsty grin, “you are a vision to behold when you let your ferocity consume you.”

You deigned to answer him, your icy countenance his only response as you straightened your posture, considering your next move.  Your distaste for him was clear as you hefted your axe from the ground, dust settling around you as it was freed with a mighty yank. Weapon in hand, you came for him in a relentless torrent, striking at him in a flurry of breakneck swings. In the ensuing madness, he grabbed the nearest weapon he could reach-a sword that was more ornate that functional, but it would serve its purpose for the time being.

The enmity increased as he reciprocated your attacks. Parrying each blow with a steady hand, he responded to your blows with calculated strikes of his own, expertly countering your aggression. The air around the two of you had become electric, charged with hostility and fervor as you hacked away at each other time and time again.

Though frantic, the assault was far from inelegant. Each swing of your axe and swipe of his blade was an orchestrated maneuver befitting the couple who performed them. It was as beautiful as it was fierce, a true force of nature. To an untrained eye the activity would appear as nothing more than a blur of chaos, annihilating all that was in its wake. But to Zenos, a man who had dedicated himself to your study, it was a sight that made his heart ache.

He was witnessing a glorious preamble, a promise forged in battle between himself and his righteous and powerful hero, the only person with whom he ever felt a true connection. This battle, amongst all of its other perks, gave him purpose.

Fighting you, he felt alive. To be the sole receiver of all your ire, your discontent, your undivided attention… it was like a dream. He realized this encounter was most likely just that, a conjuring of your presence from his sleep addled mind, a side effect of his constant ruminations of you. You already occupied each of his waking thoughts, it only made sense that having you visit in his dreams would soon follow.

Be that as it may, the knowledge that this moment lived solely in his mind did little to dissuade his desire to get lost in it, to get lost in you.  If he couldn’t have you in the waking world, his dreams would have to suffice, at least for the time being. Besides, there were things he could accomplish in his dreams that would never be plausible elsewhere, moments of intimacy he could forge that would never present a chance of happening in reality.

A particularly rough blow sent Zenos reeling. The sword knocked from his hand scattered just out of reach, his body lurching to an abrupt stop as he collided with rubble that had piled up behind him. A quick glance your way revealed a small smirk ghosting your lips, a hint of satisfaction shining through your hostility. He could see the assurance reflected in your eyes, a swell of pride over the victory you would soon be relishing.

Zenos mirrored your glee, pleased you were having as much fun as he was.

As you hoisted your axe high, thoroughly preoccupied with your pending achievement, Zenos took the moment to strike. Launching himself from the ground, he rammed his body against yours, hitting you hard and fast. The speed at which he closed the gap astounded you as much as the collision had, causing the axe to topple from your hands, skittering out of your reach. A pained grunt escaped your lips as you collided with the ground, Zenos following suit atop you. His hand cradled the back of your head as you fell, catching hold before it could crack against the stony floor. It would do no good to have you suffer injury and pass out now, not as things were about to get truly interesting.

Positioning himself atop your fallen form, his body caged you in as you lay beneath him, panting and exhausted. Splayed amongst the rubble, your confusion morphed into a look of annoyance as you realized your situation had drastically changed. Your success had been stolen from you and now the thief had you cornered, trapped right where he wanted.

“I wish you could see yourself as I see you in this moment,” Zenos spoke between his own labored breaths, pressing into you ever further as his face hovered inches from your own, “Disheveled and feral, transformed by your bloodlust, you have never been more breathtaking.”

“I’m not like you,” you retorted sharply, “I don’t revel in such acts of savagery.”

Zenos chuckled, “And yet you seemed quite delighted moments ago when you were convinced victory was within your grasp.” You frowned as his hand found purchase on your chin, gripping it in a tight pinch to keep your focus fixed his way, “But here you are now, bested and at my mercy.”

You grimaced, “I have yet to lose to you. I refuse to concede defeat.”

In response to your bold declaration, he gave a throaty, booming laugh. How was it that you always knew just what to say to drive him absolutely mad with desire?

Unable to contain himself any longer, Zenos smashed his lips to yours, capturing you in a heated and hungry kiss. Your brain took a moment to comprehend the abrupt action, but as it did you began to struggle against it, thrashing and clawing at him in an effort to create distance.  Zenos remained firm, making it clear that you had expended far more energy than he had, leaving your assault lacking the power needed to stop him. Whines of displeasure snaked from your mouth as his grip tightened on your chin, squeezing so roughly you couldn’t help but gasp in pain. Eagerly seizing the opportunity, he muscled his tongue inside of you, lapping at the inside of your mouth aggressively. He groaned as he savored the taste of you.

When a need for air arose, he pulled back slightly, staring down at you with lidded eyes. Your saliva coated his lips, giving a glossy sheen as they curled into an offputtingly tranquil smile. His hand moved from your chin to drag languidly across your cheek, the brief touch of his rough finger tips sending a shiver down your spine. Your gaze wavered the longer you stayed trapped in this awkward position, your eyes brimming with uncertainty. You seemed unsure of where to look, what to do, how to escape. In his wishful thinking, Zenos wondered if perhaps you were even unsure if you truly wanted to escape.

Amongst your numerous charms, Zenos found your enigmatic personality to be one of your most appealing. Being such a virtuous being, your motivations, ambition, and drive were all easy enough to sort out. You are Hydaelyn’s chosen, the Warrior of Light, the people’s champion, and you live up to those titles and more. You are a hero through and through, a source of salvation for those you protect and a complete nightmare for those that offer opposition. There is no doubt that you are a force to be reckoned with, no matter what the encounter or situation may be.

And what good hero is without a nemesis? It’s a role the disgraced Prince and betrayer of his kin plays well. In his illustrious life he had gone through the motions, donned many hats, played countless roles, many of which were not of his choosing. But of all his grand titles, your adversary is most certainly his favorite, the only one that gives him any sense of pride. Your existence gave him purpose, and for you alone he kept up the hunt.

But he knew it was different for you. Though cut of the same cloth and driven by destiny to engage him, your feelings did not completely align with his own. You were driven by more than barbarity, more than a duty to save your people and your planet. There was something inside of you, something that made you YOU, that he could never truly know, no matter how desperately he wanted to.

You were his greatest conundrum, a true mystery, and when you look at him as you were now with those eyes that swirled with anger, uncertainty, grief, and something yet unspoken… What was he to do but become a slave to this maddening, consuming attraction?

He gloated about being the victor, but it was clear you would always have the upper hand.

“Get off of me.”

The demand brought him back to the present, sheer determination replacing the conflicting emotions that fought for dominance within you. He could tell by the bite in your voice that your vigor was returning, and given a bit more time and provocation, the battle would gloriously resume.

“Eagar to carry on with our dance, are you?” He responded, an almost teasing lilt to his voice, “Or is it that you just can’t stand the thought of defeat at my hands?

“I already told you, you didn’t defeat me,” you glowered, your rage becoming palpable the longer his unwanted presence loomed, “I came here to end this farce and I plan to do just that.”

A beat of silence passed, followed by a sigh. Parting your lips to speak, your voice came out quieter, more desperate than it had previously.

“I wanted to keep this is civil as possible and respect your wishes as best I could, no matter how twisted they may be. But even for your own benefit, you refuse to entertain the notion of making this situation even the slightest bit amicable. You speak of such lofty things as fate and destiny, but all I am witnessing is you causing unnecessary suffering, hiding behind my name to do so.”

For a split second, another flash of uncertainty danced across your features. You bit your bottom lip in vexation, a glimmer lighting your eyes as they swept across his handsome face, “There is more to this world, more to this life, than waiting for its untimely end. To live out your days perpetuating death and blind havoc is no way to exist, it’s a tragedy. Why can’t you see that? Zenos, I-“

As if taken by surprise, you cut your own words short, silencing the previous thought that had been brewing. Zenos felt as if you looked pained, staring at him with pleading eyes, face scrunched up in frustration. Even with all the hate you carried for him, you were still trying to understand him, still clinging to the hope that maybe you could save him too.

Here, on the cusp of annihilation, you were doing all you could to fulfill the role of hero and protect the people that you loved. In order to fulfill that duty, it meant he must be defeated. There could be no other ending, the inexorable conclusion to all of this was always cold and endless death. Whether it would be all of humanities or just his own was still to be determined, but it did little to change the fact that there was no future to plan for, only a violently rapturous and melancholic end.

To be cherished by you, to feel your love as if he were one of your dearest companions… It was a thought not meant to be dwelled on, but one he found hard to completely shake from his head. How would it feel to be earnestly and unequivocally loved by you? Perhaps in another world, another time, your souls would be reborn and given another chance. A fresh beginning to grow together, an opportunity to nurture something more than the misfortune this world had thrust upon you. Maybe in some alternate telling of this tale the two of you were together and happy, with nothing but a bright future awaiting you on the horizon.

But that was simply a foolish daydream. All that he had, all he could hope for, was the here and now.

You sighed again, steeling your resolve with a shake of your head, “Never mind. You have already proven to me mere words cannot move you, so I will save my breath.”

Raising your torso as much as his hold on you would allow, your eyes bore into his, fully accepting the challenge that lay ahead. Though still restrained, there was an aura of dominance that surrounded you. It was a warning to Zenos that your binds were temporary, whether he released you willingly or otherwise was his decision, but regardless the outcome would be the same.

“If it’s the end you want, it’s the end I will bring you,” your soft words clashed with the look of malice reflected in your eyes, your breath fanning his face as your noses nearly touched. For an instant your eyes darted to his lips, and Zenos wondered if it would be you to instigate the kiss this time.

“I will fulfill my role. I will be your end and your salvation.”

Your words pierced him, the proclamation sending sparks of excitement to course through him, igniting his soul. His whole body burned for you, intense and consuming, his need for you was beginning to show itself in ways beyond his control. Pressing his hips flush between your spread legs, he made his intentions known to you, a shiver wracking his body when you released a small gasp of surprise.

Clutching the remaining shreds of his sanity, he grunted as you writhed against his growing arousal, pulling your body up towards him until he had engulfed you in a tight embrace.

“Enough time has been wasted,” he snarled into your neck, his chest rumbling as his grip on you tightened, “let us deliver a ruin unto ourselves so extraordinary, so beautiful, that naught will remain but the scattered fragments of this forsaken world.”

Loosening his grip, he pressed his lips to your forehead in a chaste, yet gentle, kiss. Your brow furrowed at his touch, shoulders tensing as you drew yourself back from him, recoiling at the small display of adoration. He found the reaction endearing, even with his intentions laid bare and and his hardened cock pressed firmly against your core, it was the smallest token of his affection that caused you to squirm.

Repugnance, hatred, scorn- whatever you felt for him in this moment, none of it mattered, none of it deterred him. He loved you, and he would make that love known in the only way he knew how, while he still had time to do so.

“This shall be my final gift to you,” he purred into your ear, his grip latching securely to your tunic. With nimble hands he started to pull, exposing yourself to him bit by bit as the fabric turned to tatters in his hands.  “Let us relish it my friend, my warrior, my beloved. Destroy me, and I shall be your devastation in kind. ”

[imagobin]

🐲Grandpa Zeno HCs🐲

Because Zeno is unironically one of my favorite HxH characters, idk why, this grandpa's vibes are immaculate. So I tried imagining how it'd be like to be his grandkid! Don't judge me fhgjkd I know I got requests to work on but I need to write some sillies for me as well çwç

A new Zoldyck is born:

Zeno prides himself on being a cold blooded assassin, laser focused on his job, but old age has definitely mellowed him out a little when it comes to his daily life.

He's definitely a lot less strict with his grandkids than he was with his own son, just like any old man. Though he has a tendency to play favorites even among his beloved family.

The day you were born, he took one look at you and knew from that moment that you were definitely going to be one of his favorites. Just that peculiar glint in your eyes was enough to activate his caring grandpa side.

Even Silva and Kikyo were surprised at how his personality seemed to flip every time he got to hold you as a baby... it was an odd, but sort of sweet sight to see Zeno behave like an actual grandpa, bouncing you on his knees or telling you stories from his younger days.

Of course, that's not all he ever did. He's a Zoldyck, and his idea of 'fun with his grandchild' went on to include flying on a dragon's back, teaching you what each torture tool does, and showing you where human weak points are. Even when you were a toddler, he was already thinking of useful things you had to know in order to grow up and be a fine Zoldyck.

Once you were old enough to start going on missions, he'd also reward you for your success, way more than your parents ever did. He'd call you to him, and would sneakily place a piece of candy and a couple bills in your hand and gently close your fist, telling you to buy whatever you wanted with that.

In your free time:

Nowadays, grandpa Zeno is a bit more focused on Killua, but you're still his second favorite at least. Naturally, because of your strength, but also because you actually listen to him and not just dismiss him like the other family members do.

You're often busy going on missions, on your own or with your siblings, but whenever you're actually home, he often asks you to get tea with him.

He has a tendency to start rambling about the "good ol' days", talking about his most iconic missions and showing you pictures of past family members.

He may still be a sharp assassin, but his memory isn't as sharp as it used to be, so sometimes he might tell you an anecdote he's already told you. If you bring it up he'll get a little embarrassed and apologize. "Ah... did I tell you already? My bad, my bad"

He tries not to let it get to him, and he definitely wouldn't tell you, but he genuinely hopes that doesn't annoy you, because it's rare to have someone who seems to genuinely enjoy listening to him.

He doesn't go out of the house too much, but when he does, sometimes he asks you to accompany him, not for any reason in particular, he just wants some company while he's out and about, and he finds the butlers quite boring.

Collaborative effort:

Grandpa Zeno doesn't take on many missions unless they're of the utmost difficulty, and he usually teams up with his son, Silva, since they're the two most experienced Zoldycks.

But he's not beyond making an exception. He recognizes your abilities as phenomenal, and compared to some of your other siblings, you're also a great team player, quick to react and synchronize with anyone you're working with. So there have been some rare times, where he's asked you to come on a mission with him.

Seeing your grandfather fight, really makes you understand why he's so feared. Despite his age and smaller build, you would NEVER want to find yourself against him. He attacks with precision and no hesitation whatsoever, like a true veteran.

If there's one frustrating thing about him, is that he's stubborn. He always wants to be the one who gets to do most of the fighting, while you're stuck on support duty.

At first, you believed it was because he didn't trust you to be strong enough, but as it turns out, it's because he enjoys fighting that much. It's not even about the kill, he gets no satisfaction from killing, he's just always looking for a good fight.

He's an old, powerful man, you figure there's not many people in the world who can surpass his strength... he's always looking for a worthy opponent.

The few times he's taken you on a mission with him, it's always been very nostalgic, because after you succeed, he always insists on going to nearby cafes, as if nothing happened, and even though by now you have your own money, he still has that old habit of putting a couple bills in your hand, to go and order whatever you want at the counter.

[kimetsu-chan]

can i request…

zeno x reader stress comfort?

you can take your time with it:) i’m just stressed about tmr🥲

~Take Your Time~

A/N: OFC POOKS. I am so honored you want me to write you a comfort fic 😭 makes me feel special 🥰 I really hope this helps :3

Zeno and reader are not in an established relationship, but it can be read as romantic <3 (also modern AU-)

key: (h/c) = hair color

TWs ⚠️: reader is stressed, that’s it :3

You had been so stressed as of lately, work had been piling up and you were just at your wits end. You were working as fast as you possibly could to make sure everything got done on time, but it apparently wasn’t fast enough as the deadlines crept closer and closer and you still had a massive amount of unfinished work that desperately needed finishing.

You tried everything to help you get it done, and I mean everything. You’d tried working on a little bit of each project at a time, you tried prioritizing the most important, you tried staying up into the late hours of the night just to get a single one finished.

But you couldn’t.

And now you were burnt out and stressed.

Laying your head down on the desk that sat in your room, you let out a frustrated groan. The pen you were holding slipped out of your hand and rolled til it bumped against your arm.

The pen wasn’t the only thing bumping against you when you felt a soft tap of fingers on your shoulder.

You had invited your best friend Zeno over to keep you company while you worked away tirelessly, and now his attention was captured by how over it you seemed. He had to admit, he had noticed your “off” behavior since he had gotten to your house, and even more so when he saw your reluctance to work on all those projects. He had been keeping tabs on you as you worked and decided that now was the time to step in.

So when you turned your head to silently ask what he needed, he offered you a sympathetic smile. Brushing some stray strands of your (h/c) out of your face, he got on his knees and positioned himself next to you. The boy never once tore his eyes from yours as he tried to figure out what was wrong, and what the best course of action would be to help.

“Hey, you okay?”

Another drawn out sigh slipped from your lips as you buried your face in your arms. Your muffled voice barely reached his ears, but he was still able to catch what you were saying.

“Yeah… Just stressed is all.”

Zeno made a small noise of understanding as he moved his hand to rub at your shoulder comfortingly.

“Well, is there anything I can do to help?”

You weren’t sure. You didn’t think so, but you appreciated his willingness to help you.

“Eh.. I don’t know.”

Zeno nodded, understanding the confusion that stress could bring. He thought for a few seconds before finally coming up with a solution.

“Hey, let’s take it one step at a time. Which one’s the hardest, let’s get that out of the way first.”

To be honest, knowing that he would help you made you feel better. You knew that he would sit here with you patiently until you finished or until you decided to take a break. He was here for you.

With subtly, yet growing, motivation, you sat back upright again and picked your pen back up. You pointed towards the project that was the most difficult for you and Zeno craned his neck to take a look at it.

“Okay, so see here…”

A/N: that was supposed to look like it would fade off into silence 😃

I don’t think it worked—

I HOPE YOU LIKED IT LARZ

I hope this made you feel better, and I apologize, I didn’t know what exactly kind of stress you were dealing with, so I kinda just went with the flow 😅

[ivorystand]

Passing The Torch

Just a little something @pinkcadaver inspired me to write. Endwalker spoilers below, so spoiler warning. Just a bit of backstory for a character heavily involved in Yuhki's story :)

Admittedly it isn't my best work, I wrote it while half asleep but here it is!

Yuhki felt herself fading in and out of consciousness. Her body felt weak, unable to even sit up, just sprawled out on the ground. 

First the Endsinger, then Zenos… she had fought with all her strength. Her adversary's corpse lay next to her, and she knew she wasn't far from meeting the same fate.

Her eyes fluttered shut, the remains of her strength slipping away. 

“You can't give up just like that,” a voice spoke. She felt herself get pulled so she was at least sitting up. Yuhki's eyes opened once more. Her surroundings had changed. She was… at Elpis. Sitting in the grass. This wasn't the aetherial sea, was it? 

A woman was sitting on the ground next to her, one of her hands resting on her shoulder reassuringly. The ever-familiar robes of an Ancient was the first thing to draw the miqo'te's attention. 

“Who are you?” Yuhki said after a moment. Her voice was still a bit strained from the previous battles. 

“Well, most called me Azem. But you can call me Eris.” 

“Azem? You're… You're me. Or… I'm you?” 

“We're both each other,” Eris laughed softly. “If that helps this make more sense. You weren't going to let your adventure end in death, were you?”

“I was trying not to, but…” 

“No buts, Yuhki. How about this? You tell me about who keeps you fighting? Who makes you keep going?” 

Yuhki stayed quiet for a moment, her tail flicking back and forth in consideration. So many people counted on her. Her group needed her. But one name was constantly on her mind. 

“Estinien. My partner.” 

“Partner? In what way? What is he like?” Eris smiled, tilting her head slightly.

Yuhki blushed slightly at the question. “Well, romantic partner, first off. But he also fights alongside me. It’s kind of funny. He and I just seem bound by fate. What are the odds that he and I were separated for 20 years only to find out we both followed the same path and both became dragoons? He's… he's my soulmate.” 

Eris's expression changed ever so slightly. While she didn't see everything Yuhki had been through with Estinien, she could sense their connection. 

A connection she recognized. A barely audible sob escaped the ancient’s lips. 

“I knew someone just like him. Just like your Estinien,” she said softly. 

Yuhki's ears folded back slightly. “Is everything okay?” 

“As you know by now, the end of the Final Days caused Etherys to be sundered. There was someone I cared for. Someone who I would do anything for. His name was Achilles. I… I never thought he felt the same. And having been appointed as Azem,” Eris took a shaky breath. “I didn't have the time. I never knew. But I hoped until the last that… one day, maybe in another lifetime, I might be able to be with him.” 

“Are you saying… Estinien might be him? Or, at least a shard of him?” Yuhki asked. Eris nodded, a few tears rolling down her face—a mix of happiness and pain. 

“I suppose so. You have much better luck than I did, Yuhki. I can't help but feel a bit jealous.” 

“Don't be,” Yuhki responded with a smile, hugging the woman, her unsundered self. “Estinien can be quite the pain, hopefully, your version of him wasn't nearly as bad. I still have to remind him to take a break from training to eat. Are you sure that's something you want?” 

“I'm not quite sure. But if that is one of his only bad habits,” Eris laughed softly, before changing the subject with a smile. “I'm so proud of you. For achieving so many things I couldn't.” 

“Well, I wouldn't be here if it weren't for you. You just passed down the torch, of course I need to carry it. Thank you…” 

Eris nodded before gently laying Yuhki back down. As the once Azem stood, Yuhki could hear a few faint voices. The voices of her brothers telling each other to switch and let the other try healing for a bit. The voice of Alphinaud begging for his spells to work. Estinien's concerned demands that she wake up. 

“You have so many people worried about you. Go back to them,” Eris spoke, both her voice and form seeming to fade as Yuhki's exhausted eyes shut yet again. 

When she finally came to once more, she was lying on the floor of the Ragnarok. She sat up with a groan, only to be instantly pulled into a tight embrace by Estinien. “Don't ever do that again,” he whispered, holding her tight against his chest. 

Yuhki just nodded, returning the embrace. Not just for herself, but in the hopes Eris had felt it too with her love, her Achilles…

[coolcataetheryte]

Say You Love Me Series (1, 2, 3, 5)

Pairing: Thancred x Joker (mWoL) x G'raha

Summary: during the last calm before the storm, Joker, Thancred, and G’raha make a promise for the future. Also works for Vierapril prompt 29: Future

Note: what would have happened during the Returning Home room cutscene (the one where you choose who visits your room) since Joker is dating Thancred and G’raha. Spoilers for that, as the dialogue is very derivative of what is canonically said. I changed it slightly, mainly because I didn't want to just copy paste. I hope it isn’t boring with me including it >.< sorry

Word count: 1,317

Background info: This is a series of snippets of Joker’s life with Thancred and G’raha in my Magical Heroes AU, during any part of the entirety of the game. The AU elements may not be entirely prominent in all stories, but know that they do take place in an AU, and so some things may be different from canon. Not every part will be in chronological order. I’ll just be writing them as they come to me. I’ll always give a bit of context of when it takes place. It isn’t necessary to read the previous ones, but they may help with understanding some things, such as specific gestures, or phrases they do/say to each other.

Thancred had come into the room, unnoticed, to find Joker holding his head. He knew by now what that meant, and hurried to his side. He very gently placed a hand on his back, knowing it would startle him regardless, but ready in case Joker collapsed.

Joker came back to himself. He was shaking. He jumped when he noticed Thancred’s presence, just as he’d predicted, but he held him close.

“Sorry,” Joker said with an awkward laugh.

“What did you see?,” asked Thancred. “On second thought.. maybe it’s best I don't know.”

“I’d rather not talk about it,” Joker said. “Where’s G’raha?”

“He’ll be along. Actually.. there’s something i wanted to ask you while he isn’t here.”

Joker looked at him.

“It’s nothing so dire,” he assured.

They moved to sit on the bed, facing each other.

“I’m ready to listen,” Joker held his hand.

“Well, we may have quite literally entered our final days,” Thancred said. “and if that’s true, then everything we did for Ryne and the first was meaningless..”

He squeezed Joker’s hand, “If it comes to it.. If running is our only option.. I don’t know if I'll have it in me to make the right choice. I trust you and the scions with my life, and I hope that’s mutual at least sometimes. I’d never forgive myself if my stubbornness put any of you in danger.”

Joker brought Thancred’s hand close to chest, listening carefully.

“If you see me turning a blind eye to reality,” he continued. “Beat some sense into me, would you? I trust you to be the only one able to keep me in line.”

Joker smiled at him. “I can do that. I know how hard it’ll be, but I'll be here to help you through it. And give you the slap you need.”

Thancred chuckled, hugging him. “I knew I could count on you.”

G’raha slipped quietly into the room, closing the door softly.

“Oh, good,” Joker perked up. “I’m happy you’re both here now.”

“Ah, sorry to keep you waiting,” G’raha smiled. “I’m glad you’re awake. I thought maybe you’d be resting, so I was trying not to disturb you.”

Joker reached a hand out to him. G’raha hurried over and joined them.

“Since you’re still up,” G’raha fidgeted a bit as he spoke. “Can I say something?”

“Of course you can,” said Thancred, making more room for him on the bed.

Joker nodded in agreement.

“Well..,” G'raha hesitated. “I'm afraid this might be our last quiet night for some time. I.. I worry about you, Joker. You’ve bested all your enemies-Zenos, and even Zodiark- but the victories have come at a cost to yourself.”

G’raha’s ears were downturned. He held Joker’s hand a bit tighter and closed his eyes.

“Everyone has limits, even you,” he said sadly. “I’m worried the weight of the Final Days will be too much.”

He looked at Joker resolutely now, and held his hand to his chest, much like Joker had done to Thancred moments before.

“You needn’t bear it alone,” he said. “Let me share the burden. I may not have the capacity you do, but I can shoulder a few more satchels from your mountain of um.. baggage.”

“G’raha,” Joker said softly. He couldn’t help but smile at him.

Meanwhile, Thancred couldn’t help but feel slightly guilty as he listened to G’raha’s speech.

“You’ve done so much for me, and it’s only fair I return the favor,” G’raha continued. “Of course, it needn't always be troubles we share. Moments of joy seem few and far between but we’ll look back and remember all of this fondly. Every part of it, because we got through it together. And of course there’s all our journeys yet to come. To the ends of the world and beyond!”

“And beyond,” Joker nodded, and hugged him tight. “Thank you G’raha. I know I always have you both behind me.”

He noticed Thancred’s solemn expression, and touched a hand to his cheek. “Don’t feel guilty.”

“I only hope I haven't added to your burden,” Thancred said.

“I promise you haven’t,” Joker responded.

G’raha blinked between them, confused. Thancred gave him a soft smile.

“I asked Joker to be the one to make sure I'm pragmatic about the situation,” he explained. “But now I realize I should've spoken to you both. I was afraid to burden you, G’raha, while I burden Joker too easily.”

“I know you’re worried about her,” G’raha said, immediately knowing what Thancred was referring to. “I’m here for you, too. If Joker can’t knock sense into you, I will.”

Joker smiled at them. “We both will. I’ll never think of anything you ask me as a burden.”

Thancred nodded. “All that being said.. there is something else weighing on my mind.”

They looked at him with concern.

“I was going to wait until everything had calmed,” he said. “but G’raha’s words have made it unbearable for me to hold it back. And there may not be any better time than the present.”

“What is it?,” G’rah prodded, growing increasingly worried.

“I’ve been thinking,” Thancred was suddenly feeling a bit embarrassed. “Well, I've been thinking I want nothing more than our souls to be eternally bonded.”

G’raha gasped, his ears twitching. He looked at Joker happily. “Oh, Joker, he wants to marry you!”

“You really want that?,” Joker asked, tears already beginning to form.

“I do,” Thancred smiled. “Ideally, it would be both of you, and I hope I haven't hurt you by asking this, G’raha. That is the other reason I held off on the notion.”

G’raha shook his head earnestly. “No, never. I completely understand. You two have been together much longer. It’s natural you would choose him for this. I’m really truly happy you chose to ask.”

“I would love to,” Joker said, the tears falling. “We’ll get married, and then we’ll have a private ceremony to include G’raha at least in spirit.”

G’raha’s own tears sprung from his eyes as he hugged Joker tight.

“And as a last request,” Thancred said seriously, taking G’raha’s hand. “Should anything go wrong.. should anything happen to me..”-he looked into his eyes- “I want you to marry Joker.”

G’raha nodded, holding his gaze. “I promise.”

Joker hugged them both, taking a moment to press his forehead against each of theirs. “We’re all going to make it out of this together. I won’t let anything happen to either of you. To anyone. We’re getting through this, one way or another, and all of our friends will be there for our wedding.”

The three of them held each other tight. Scared and unsure, crying.

Eventually, they’d made themselves more comfortable. The light was turned off, and they lay on each other and caressing anything they could reach. Hair, arms, a furry ear. Just as they always did.

“Should I wear a dress?,” Joker asked suddenly, breaking the silence and making them all laugh. “I mean, I don't mind a good dress every now and then.”

“You look pretty in dresses,” G’raha smiled. “You look pretty in anything.”

“He’s right,” Thancred agreed. “You could wear a sackcloth and you would still be the most gorgeous man I've ever seen.”

Joker nuzzled into Thancred's chest. “Aw, what did I ever do to deserve you two?”

“You deserve everything your heart desires,” Thancred mused, stroking Joker’s back and scratching G’raha’s ears.

G’raha hummed in agreement, starting to purr softly.

The trio was finally drifting into sleep. A sadness washed over Joker as he remembered his most recent vision. He tightened his grip slightly on both of his lovers.

“Say you love me?,” he whispered into the darkness.

But the other two had already fallen into slumber; he was met with silence. He took a shaky, deep breath. He forced himself to empty his mind. They were here. He could feel them. He would protect them. He needed to.

[hythlodaeus-mynewoldfriend]

📥👖🧠✨️ for the fic asks!

Thank you Liz! More centered on my ffxiv stuff since this is the blog for that haha. Anyway! Let's get right to it starting with the last question!

FanFic ASk Game

✨ Choose three adjectives to complement your own writing.

Emotional, tongue-in-cheek, free-spirited or at least so I hope!

📥 What is your fave fic to receive comments/messages on?

Is it cheating to say any of them? Because I love seeing what people have to say on what I write and put out there! Among my ffxiv stuff I always love seeing comments on things that involve Stasia and Carly (which is mostly wips i know) as they are the ones that stray from the general story and aren't always likable so I like being able to see how they come across and make sure that its the way I intend to and think I'm doing when writing. A more specific piece it would have to be this piece with Anthea and the final days. I feel its one of my best works posted in completion and I like seeing how an event like that comes across to others especially given that much of that time period is up to interpretation of an individual.

👖 Are you a planner, plantser, or pantser? Is it consistent?

No planning we die like men! jk jk I am more of a plantser in that I go into a wip with a general idea in my head on what I want the main focus of a piece to be, the intention of it, and any specific lines or actions that inspired it. After that I just write it out and see what happens! A lot of times I get to where I was planning and in ways I didn't expect, other times I end up somewhere different but it felt so natural writing it that I had to leave it. There are the rare occasions I don't do any planning and just get the urge to write and so I do just that and will come back to it if I get stuck, this happened recently with a piece where I had very little in mind other than knowing Phobos is reading various letters Deimos got, but who they were from and what they said and going back home were all things that I came up with on the spot.

One thing I really let free and hardly put any thought into ahead of time is the formatting of my writing though. I like to at times be a bit of a visual writer in that I will use breaks, bolds, italics, lack of spaces, etc. to convey something that I probably would take too long to write out in any other fashion. Besides how else can I best describe racing thoughts and anxiety than putting a bunch of words together without any space between them haha.

Also will mention that much of my stuff looks like panster writing because I was writing it as I was actively playing the story so I had no idea how it was all going to end and what I wanted to do with my kids as Sib and Demos started in two different universes.

🧠 What’s an idea you have that you can’t quite call a WIP yet?

This would depend more on what you would call a wip. I tend to count anything that's at least a few paragraphs or dialogue long, which there's quite a bit of that. If we're talking just straight ideas then there's plenty of moments that I would love to write but I don't have a way to write them quite yet. Things like the last conversation Carly and Zenos have, the conversation Demos has with his mentor after the Vault, lighter moments like Sib trying to tackle Emet in ShB or the montages of the gang waking up at first light to get moving with a frantic Sib trying to catch up anime style getting ready. Hell the time that Deimos believed he could randomly tame a unicorn resulting in him, Emet, and Hyth being chased by a herd of them. Or the start of Etheirys' Worst Girls Trip with Sib and Stasia landing on their guide. I just have a lot of little things or big moments that I'd love to write because I can see them in my brain and how they play out but it can be so hard to translate that. I feel this is also why gposing has become a way for me to tackle these ideas as I plan as if I'm watching a show or movie so I can better get the angles and descriptions without having to actually describe anything haha.

[zeloinator]

Pff I could out-awkward you I bet

Anyway who is Zee Zalinos? I'm new here

Well I might not be new to tumblr, I am new to ffxiv oc stuff so hopefully this all makes sense xD I also dont really ever roleplay as Zee Zalinos (despite us sharing a name at this point whoops on that she very much is a lot of me but a distinct character I would say hopefully) but she is my Warrior Of Light from FFXIV! I dont know a lot of etiquitte I have been informed of from my boyfriend who used to WoW roleplay so I’m sorry if I break any of that! I have no clue what I’m doing but I’m a writer who loves to Project and now I have an adorable Au’ra who is also disabled and a healer main~

But! Zee Zalinos is my beloved little lizard

My gpose skills aren’t doing her the justice she deserves but I’m trying to improve for her~

I put all lot of her lore (condensed as much as I could and hope it makes sense) in the woltourney post but I’ll happily say that and more!!

“Zee has always wanted to travel, I dont have much lore for her early life yet but once she had decided to travel to Gridania and become a Conjurer no one and nothing could stop her. (/spoilers for all expansions, as well as tw for losing limbs, sudden disabilities) In Heavensward she lost both Haurchafaunt, a companion she didn't trust until he gave his life for her, and her right leg. Not able to slow down she forced herself to learn to walk with her new prosthetic leg and continued her path through Stormblood. As a White Mage Zee never felt like she could discuss her crippling pain and phantom limb symptoms from her lost leg, it wasn’t until mid Shadowbringers, after long talks with Ardbert (or scoldings as he would describe it as) she finally told her companions, the scions and her trusted friends, about her struggles with her leg. At the end of Endwalker Zenos manages to injure Zee much more severely than it appears at first, the quick and panicked healing magics Zee performed on herself masking the severity for some time. It is not long until Zee looses her left arm, gaining her second prosthetic limb, but doing much better in dealing with its loss.

Zee is a pure healer, every other class she attempts is lacking the same touch and skill, no matter how much time she may commit to learning. Healing comes as easy as a breath to Zee, White magic being the simplest for her to wield. The stars and planet gazing of Astrologian winning her over very quickly after arriving in Ishguard. Though in her free time Zee is known to be an expert crafter, often holing herself inside her house and focusing purely on her work for days. Culinarian was the fastest for her to pick up, with Goldsmith being hot on its heels as her second best skill. Though post Endwalker Zee is ever busy with crafting, the call of her island from Tataru has her visiting as often as she can sneak away. While on her island Zee barely, if ever, uses her prosthetic arm, only using the prosthetic leg when she is wanting more maneuvering freedom without one of her beloved mounts out helping her. One of Zee’s most hidden passions is her animal caretaking. While her Chocobo, Ariadnae, is ever a worrier for Zee, the wol is always forcing her beloved bird to rest in between their big adventures. “

I have a lot more in my brain but I dont write it out a lot of the time but I would like to so I am hoping to talk about her more~ and write and gpose 💖

[sodomhipped]

2022 writing wrapped

total number of completed works? in how many fandoms?

20 fics (+2 renovated and reposted works; +1 meta piece)

1 comic

8 fandoms

3 stories (18,724 words) were gifts

7 stories (25,785 words) were for exchanges/challenges

total posted word count?

77,548

fandoms written/drawn in? and how many works in each?

final fantasy xiv (10 stories, 1 comic = 45,144 words)

vampyr (3 stories = 12,690 words)

elden ring (2 stories = 4,961 words)

dragon age: inquisition (2 stories= 4,585 words)

ready or not (1 story = 4,400 words)

the great gatsby (1 story = 2,188 words)

where are you going, where have you been? (1 story = 1,437 words)

papillon (1 story = 1,096 words)

atomic blonde (1 story = 1,047 words)

were there any fandoms you didn’t expect to write/drawn in this year?

pretty much everything other than ffxiv was a surprise. but the most surprising was elden ring. i was literally playing it one day and said to my partner, “this is such a fun game but i don’t think it would be something i ever write fic for.” within two weeks after saying that, i had written my first story for it.

what characters or pairings you wrote most? 

emet-selch is the character i wrote most, accounting for 33,607 words / 8 stories (or 43% of my total output).

and relatedly, hythlodaeus/hades is by far my most common pairing this year at 27,747 words / 6 stories (or 36% of my total output).

did you write more or less than you thought you would?

i suffered an intense writer's block from august 2015 until march 2022. during all those years, i published less than 2,500 words. additionally, my most productive year prior to the block was 2015 at 34,392 words. so 2022 has been amazing. i never knew i could write so much and i hope it means that i will have a similarly productive year in 2023.

what’s your favorite story of the year? 

i have a soft spot in my heart for from the garlean apocrypha (ffxiv; garlemald-centric; gen), which is where i’ve put a lot of my garlemald headcanons and gotten to explore fun ideas. i also met some fabulous people by writing it.

what is your best story this year?

the honest answer is probably a terrible new ache (vampyr; explicit; mccullum/reid), but i am fond of wanting comes too close (to feeling) (elden ring; explicit; d/rogier).

What were your most popular stories this year (by kudos)?

the stars are ravenous (ffxiv; explicit; hythlodaeus/hades)

measure out your honesty (ffxiv; explicit; thancred/urianger)

shifting in a second light (ffxiv; gen; emet-selch/hythlodaeus)

what story do you think is the most underappreciated?

three stories were a bit of a letdown this year: 

it’s been a long way down (ffxiv; mature; fandaniel/zenos)

the lottery (ffxiv; gen; hythlodaeus/hades)

what once was my heart (ffxiv; explicit; emet-selch/wol).

what story was the most fun to write?

i had a great time writing we make our own meaning (ffxiv; teen; hythlodeaus/hades). i got to dive into richard siken’s poetry and hythlodeaus’ interior world while using an experimental style.

what story is the sexiest?

i’m a terrible judge of this but maybe the stars are ravenous (explicit; hythlodaeus/hades)? but i personally had the most fun writing the sex scene in it lives in the throat (vampyr; explicit; mccullum/reid).

as a counterpoint, my partner’s vote is for it’s been a long way down (ffxiv; mature; fandaniel/zenos).

what story was the hardest to write?

i finally finished the habit of a foreign sky (dragon age; explicit; dorian/inquisitor) after a six-year hiatus so...probably that one.

what is your favorite line from this year?

beautiful prose isn’t my strongest quality but here are some faves:

“Gatsby comes with a gasp, an entirely human sound that Nick has always loved because it is the most unrehearsed thing he has heard come from Gatsby’s mouth.” 

- to the defeated world (the great gatsby; explicit; nick/gatsby)

“Zenos’ lack of reaction only accentuates Varis’ own inadequacies. Even now as a man full grown, every conversation with Solus leaves him shaking with rage, his thoughts scattered and frantic. He is better able to hide his reaction, but it doesn’t seem as if Zenos is merely hiding any emotional response—he simply has none. Who crafted this boy to withstand treatment that Varis took long years to learn how to weather?” 

- from the garlean apocrypha (ffxiv; gen; garlemald gen)

“Later, he will ask himself the question: Could he have put the star before himself? Before his lover? His entire body is overtaken with shuddering doubt.” 

- we make our own meaning (ffxiv; gen; hythlodaeus/hades)

“Either of those reasons should be enough not to do this, but he feels like a man possessed. He wants to wring out sighs of pleasure from this particular man, offering up anything he can from his own spartan soul.” 

- a terrible new ache (vampyr; explicit; mccullum/reid)

favorite title used this year?

what once was my heart (ffxiv; emet-selch/wol; explicit)

did you take any risks this year? 

i’ve been throwing myself into projects without really thinking of risks. i’ve tried new styles, joined exchanges, hosted challenges--and been enjoying every minute. mostly.

but the story that stretched my boundaries the most was half alive to the brightening sky (ffxiv; explicit; hythlodaeus/hades).

other than that, i toiled long and hard on my first comic ever, which i think was a risk! 

are there any stories you haven’t written yet but intend to?

so many! i’m still working on finishing half alive to the brightening sky (ffxiv; explicit; hythlodaeus/hades). then i have both some ffxiv and non-ffxiv projects i want to complete: 

not a fix-it story for d/rogier (elden ring)

finished jan 2023: cruelty is made of distance (mature)

not a fix-it story anatole/dolokhov (natasha, pierre and the great comet of 1812)

several smutty side stories and a small sequel for the stars are ravenous (explicit; hythlodaeus/hades) ‘verse

a bottom hades/emet-selch pwp (ffxiv)

finished feb 2023: to whisper all night as the trees do (explicit)

a dark romance for varis/regula/carosa (ffxiv)

began apr 2023: expelled from rapture’s road (explicit)

finishing from the garlean apocrypha (ffxiv; garlemald-centric; gen)

finished jan 2023

a long zenos story (ffxiv)

a long emet-selch gen story (ffxiv)

do you have any fanfic, original fic, or art goals for next year? 

i’m going to aim for 50k written in fanfic and another 50k in original works. i also want to experiment with style more to make my prose a bit tighter and more interesting. i would also like to try to do another comic? maybe?

last thoughts?

finally, i would like to thank everyone who has supported me this year. if you cheered me on in any way--following my social media, giving kudos, commenting, or just chatting occassionally--please know that it means the world to me. here's to a great 2023!

[find my ao3 and all stories here] 

[candycryptids]

Hide and map for the oc meme! Dealers choice for character v-v)/

This took me an embarrassing long time to get to despite being so zazzed for the ask (sending you flowers btw) (under a cut for length) (We’re gonna dive into Chuu and Mochiie, two of my Final Fantasy Oc’s ;w;)

“Hide; what does your OC hide, why do they hide it?”

In the case of Chuu, she hides quite a bit; her origins, her projects, her workshop… Largely because her projects border illegal-unethical and being uh. An ex-engineer for Garlemald prior to the Calamity doesn’t look Great when you’ve skipped country and moved into one of the several countries that were harassed by Garlemald lmao. The FC she fell in line with isn’t exactly on full legal lines either, which is why it’s perfect (they’re not inclined to turn her in even if they find out because they’ll all go down with her, but more likely than turning her in, they’d probably Get It.

She also hid the Questionable Project of Cloning herself, until it was nearly done. Or, rather, she Built Tuesday, meant to be ‘her, but if she was a boy and just a little uglier’ because she has ego and she has to be The Prettiest. (Besides her girlfriend, Talia) and you might think ‘that’s not that unethical’ and you’d be kinda right except they took the concept of Anima (from the Relic Weapon Questline. Where you imbue a weapon with a soul.) and then. Reworked it to fit into her Pet Project. To clean and cook. And. To go to places she could not for Legal and Safety reasons. Fun thing she doesn’t hide is her Inability To Read Common. She just can’t. She could learn to, she’s very smart, but she refuses. Instead she invented her own writing system and makes someone else read her letters to her and dictates anything she wants to mail (to Tuesday, usually, if he’s home. Otherwise she just Calls via linkpearl, because she has No phone-call anxiety unlike me)

(I’m guessing Map was an autocorrect on Mask cos I couldn’t find map anywhere in there >w>;;) “Does your OC wear a mask, literally or Figuratively? What goes on beneath it? Is there anyone in their life who gets so see who they are under the mask?”

Mochi dons a figurative mask of being Brave and Heroic and Resourceful as the Warrior Of Light as time goes on. At first it wasn’t a mask, because things were challenging and hard but he had support and he felt Capable. But then the Massacre of the Waking Sands happens and he breaks down hard. (I have screenshots! I might add a link to them later, but they’re in his tag 💖) It sets that shift from being a hero is fun and adrenaline pumping to, everything feeling very. Real. And lethally dangerous. (As if being Kidnapped and fighting a false God isn’t dangerous while the people who were captured with you got tempered and then subsequently put to sword… but they weren’t people he KNEW.) So he starts putting up the front of being Unshakeable, a Paladin, the Sword and Shield of Hope, the Unbreakable Fists of Freedom. Etc. The Hero (not Man) who will take down the Empire and any Primals that threaten the peace and safety of This Star’s peoples. Which becomes a heavy weight to carry- especially when he gets to grappling with… not everyone with the potential to be, to do, good, can be swayed to pursue that potential (Zenos). Not everyone can be saved etc.

So Zenos gets to peek under that mask- an angry, and terrified Au’ra with the edges of control issues when things don’t work like he believes they should (You CAN do good you just won’t) and Zenos relishes in this because that’s always when their clashes are the most fierce (When Mochi stops putting on bravado and face and starts fighting without etiquette or restraints.) (it’s complicated. I haven’t gotten this far with Mochi yet but it’s what I imagine it’s going to shake out like ~v~)

And, someone who he actually cares about (someone who he’s not at odds with) that sees under the mask is probably Thancred and Urianger? They know the kinds of burdens Mochi carries and even if Mochi doesn’t let the mask slip around Thancred I feel like he’s sharp. He can. Tell. So if he perhaps invites Mochi to spar somewhere far from everyone where there’s enough room to cut loose and go until everything burns and he collapses with a dagger or a gunblade pointed at his chest it’s. A nice reprieve. (Alternatively. He just invites Mochi to have a drink or 15 at the Rising Stones.. it’s not healthy, but at least Mochi can blame his tears on the bottle.)

Urianger is good at getting Mochi to open up just by Being there, either quietly researching in the same secluded room as him or sipping coffee (black, he doesn’t need cream and sugars, the man’s drinking this for the caffeine Only) while Mochi sits there writing correspondences to the Tribes or to his Squadron until he just starts talking out loud. He asks rhetoricals and complains and mourns and Urianger listens quietly and doesn’t comment when Mochi moves to sit next to him with his tail wrapped around his ankle :/ (he’s a guy that employs casual touch frequently)

Uhhh…. Anyways that’s what I got Big Kisses if you read this mwah mwah

[floweramongstthecold]

FFXIV OC List

Okay! SO! I decided to make an OC list! Cause I have too many and I needa talk about them more somehow and write about them. I just never know what to talk or write about. XS All of my ocs are dating someone too so I'll probably add who they're with too. Except one.

Which meaans this might be a bit long with the added info sooo, I'll put it under the cut! I MIGHT make another list for their Ancients but I dunno....

My first main that I actually finished all expansions with first is Yayashi Yashi. She's half Dunesfolk and half Plainsfolk. She's the main WoL of the group and she's married to both Ysayle and Estinien. She has two kids with them. She has a son with Estinien named Heliox and a daughter she's co-parenting with Ysayle who's Ysayle and Estinien's kid named Elianne who she also technically adopted.

After the final days, Yaya took a lonnggg break from adventuring and opened up a botany and flower arrangement shop in Gridania until a new adventure comes calling.

~~~

Khulgana Goro is a Xaela who travels Eorzea with her horse husband Ganzorig and her husband Dzhambul Olkund.

~~~

Nekaia Gentrique is a Half Moonkeeper/Half Sunseeker Miqo'te who was born in Gridania but got adopted by a family in Ul'dah, who taught her about prostitution, which she didn't partake in until she moved Thavnair, before she kind of quit. While living in Ul'dah she ran a soup kitchen out of her house for the refuges and delivered food to them. She's married to Alphinaud and has a few minions as her pets. Living in Thavnair she also has a soup kitchen.

~~~

Saechen Olkund is a Xaela who was captured by the Garlean Empire with her older brother. She was abused to the point that she eventually killed her abusers but it took an emotional toll on her for a while due to it. Saechen and her brother were both WoLs until she suddenly betrayed the Scions after falling in love with Zenos. Wanting to save him from death, she "disappeared" and began to work with the Ascians to keep Zenos safe. Her and Zenos have a tradition to spar each other to death a lot until they eventually cut back and turned into sparring every other month.

~~~

Sophia is a Dwarf from The First who ended up on The Source after she and her brother managed to open the door to the crystal tower before G'raha arrived. Before arriving in The Source she and her family were attacked by Sin Eaters and she barely survived the Light Sickness. She was found by a Viera living with the Night's Blessed by the name of Zekir, who decided to adopt and take her in. She was in the hospital on The Source for a longg time until Alisaie returned with the cure. Sophia is also mute and knows Eorzean Sign Language. She has a Moogle named Mogli helping as her translator. While living in Sharlayan with Zekir, she met and befriended Erenville and they eventually started dating after The Last Days

~~~

Zekir is a Viera who lived in Rak'Tika then left and ended up living among the Night's Blessed because it offered him more freedom to be himself. While living in Rak'Tika he was a hunter who led his own hunting party. Upon joining the Night's Blessed that didn't change. While living among them he ran into Sophia and adopted her. When he and Sophia reached The Source, he did everything in his power to try and save her, even attending the Studium in Sharlayan in hopes that they might know a cure or at least a way to stabilize Sophia's condition. Even after Sophia was cured by Alisaie, he didn't stop studying.

~~~

Hachiko Taisho is a Raen who's traveling Eorzea with her boyfriend as a way to sightsee and learn about all the other cultures that are out there. She was born and raised in Hingan where she attended public school. After she graduated she became a priestess and geisha. She's gonna be another main who I'm gonna go through the expacs with and she might be fantasiaed into a FemHroth so she's kind of... pending at the moment but this is what I got so far.

~~~

Ilar is a Rava Viera who left his home and clan after he came of age because he didn't want to have to live his life as a warden forever. He's a very big flirt and kind of suave when it comes to people he's in a relationship with. He ran into Hachiko when he found himself in Hingan. He hasn't picked up a job there yet.

~~~

Alagh Yid Haragin is a Xaela who found herself in Ishgard, where her family was murdered during the Au Ra raids. She was saved by Haurchefant who she's now dating. After the Vault Incident, she got him to retire and they moved away from Ishgard and somewhere secluded in Coerthas.

~~~

Tonemi is a Seeker of the Sun who's been born and raised in Thavnair, where she works as a Jewelry Maker. When she was old enough, she attended the Studium to become a Gleaner and that's where she first met and befriended G'raha Tia. The two hit it off and after they graduated they started dating. While G'raha was asleep in the Crystal Tower, a few days later she found out she was pregnant with her first child. So, she was a single parent for a while until the Scions brought Raha back.

[relentless-endurance]

hi so I was going thru some of your writings and I found this (https://at.tumblr.com/relentless-endurance/14-for-wolzalia/zc0d03cqpdz8) and I also saw that you’re taking prompts so if you feel up to it, maybe another little piece in this setting? I’m curious about it! I don’t have exact idea but perhaps something in the HW era?

First of all, thank you so much! I love this AU!

(for those curious: it basically boils down to: what if 1. Zenos was yoinked from Garlemald at a young age. and 2. actually got to be the warrior of light's friend? basically a fun what-if that turns the murderman to theatre kid ratio from 80/20 to like. 60/40.)

under a cut because i had BRAIN WORMS and this got wordy

And now, what was she supposed to do?

The haze had cleared, her anger had abated, she had carved her path and met her goal.

And for what?

It still hurt. She was not soothed, she was not satisfied. Zalia didn't even feel accomplished.

Even more - there was a whole new problem. Another person she cared about put in grave danger, another bloody path to another inevitable battle - where something would inevitably end.

Someone.

Slumped to her knees, staring at her hands - cut and bloodied - body aching, the adrenaline leaving her; she felt suddenly very, very weary. So wrapped up in the aftermath that she did not hear familiar footsteps approach from behind her, nor her name being called. It was not until a hand was laid on her shoulder, causing her to near jump out of her own skin, that she was brought back to reality.

"Zalia?"

She swore, turned and looked up - and immediately felt a little sheepish as she realized it was Zenos, looking quite concerned. "Oh-"

She'd scramble to her feet, the aches and pains of her battle made even more keen as she tried to pull herself back together. "S-sorry, I was just- its-" It didn't work. Her vision blurred, tears running down her cheeks, and everything she was trying to say was stuttered and stammering, and all she was really capable of in that moment was shaking and crying.

Zalia cursed her timing. He was not the person to do this in front of. This was not the time. She needed - she needed -

Two hands on her shoulders, and the much taller man would stoop a little to look her directly in the face. "Zalia."

Though his  tone still carried that concern, it was also even and firm, a soft snap to grab her attention, and she'd take a deep breath. "Its done. Thordan is dead. But Estinien he-"

"I saw as I approached, a shame I was not quite quick enough to try and help." There was regret there, in his expression, but  he was focused on her in that moment. "I'm sorry - but one thing at a time. Are you alright? Are you hurt, my friend?"

"I'm." Zalia would wipe her eyes, and take another deep breath. "A battle unlike any I fought. They were as strong as primals. Stronger, even. I ache. But its nothing I'm not used to."

In that moment, there was something in his features - unreadable to her in this moment, though she could have sworn he was also impressed.  "All at once? That is twelve more than your record. You've done well, my friend. And the lost have been rightfully avenged." A pause, a frown. "But - and you can forgive me for being presumptive, I hope - it is a hollow victory, now with another comrade torn from us."

Zalia's face scrunched up, and she fought back a fresh wave to tears. "All the writing and poetry on revenge and the way it leaves you, what it does to you - you know better than I. It is not wrong, the emptiness I feel. Punctuated by the fact that it just doesn't ever stop, does it?" She'd suck in another breath. "There is no rest, there is no reprieve. The wheel always turns, the cycle begins anew. Why?"

He'd step back, squaring to his full height and patting her on the shoulder. "You are beginning to sound like me, friend. Waxing poetic on life's miseries."

It was an attempt at humour, and she may have been more upset if she wasn't so tired, so instead she just gave a smile that did not quite meet her eyes. "I suppose so. But my question, still stands."

He'd fold his arms, tilting his head to the side a little. "I suppose I could go on about possibilities, but the truth is probably far less theatric and poetic. A hero's journey has never been a smooth road, for they or those who walk alongside them."

Zalia knew Zenos had not meant it to be, it was something that stung all the same. Still, she'd take another deep breath, and nod. "Then I suppose, once again, I walk this road. Carry this burden."

He shook his head. "We, Zalia. We walk this road. As ever, you have my blade should you have need of it."

A trickle of warmth filled her chest at that notion, and this time the small smile would be genuine. "Of course, wouldn't dream of not taking you on an adventure. You gotta promise me one thing though, okay?"

Another tilt of his head, curious. "Yes?"

"Don't... Let the others know I broke down. Please. Its going to be hard enough as it is."

His expression briefly soured, and he pursed his lips, then seemed to want to speak - but stopped himself, and shook his head. "You have my word, Zalia."

"That means the world to me, my friend."

[chorusfm]

MuMu – “Honeymoon Love” (Video Premiere)

Just in time for Valentine’s Day, MuMu have returned with a new music video for “Honeymoon Love.” On this love-filled track, MuMu have crafted a song that is sure to leave a smile on your face. The video features a collaboration with Zeno Mountain Farm and MuMu shared this about the music video, ”I hope this video reminds us that diversifying our friend groups doesn’t have to happen in designated spaces like Zeno. We can reach out to our neighbors, strike up a conversation on the bus, or share a dance with someone who walks/talks/thinks differently than you. We shot this video in two hours, with zero dollars and infinite love.” I was also able to catch up with this artist for a brief interview below. What was your introduction to Zeno Mountain Farm, and how did you decide to return to that community with regard to your newest single, and this new music video as well? How would you say your relationship with everyone you met there has impacted you? Zeno has a way of pulling people into their magical orbit. Once you’re in, you’re in for life. It’s an organization made up of creatives with all types of abilities and based on friendship. I was brought to Zeno Mountain Farm by a friend back in 2016.  She and I had a travel blog called ‘Globerollers’ where we rolled all over the world writing about accessibility. I rollerblade, she wheelchairs. It’s a thing. We went there because they seemed like-minded in creativity and messaging. Soon after that, I ended up as head songwriter on their first feature-length film Best Summer Ever, which is now streaming on Hulu.  Last summer I asked if Zeno would shoot a music video with me for my new song, “Honeymoon Sex.” They said yes but they wanted to keep it PG, so I changed the title to “Honeymoon Love” and then it was ‘lights, camera, action’.  I love making anything and everything with Zeno. Every single person in this video is a dear friend of mine who I’m extremely grateful to know.  Can you describe the general message of your track “Honeymoon Sex,” and why you chose to re-imagine it for this Valentine’s Day video, “Honeymoon Love”? What is the most important message you want your listeners to take away from this video? My single “Honeymoon Sex” was a love child between my desire for connection and fear of commitment. I knew the Zeno crew would kick ass in making a video for it.  After the shoot I put a raunchy edit together and ran it by the Zeno directors. They shot it down so fast. The Zeno community is full of dynamic, talented, and infinitely loving individuals. They wanted better representation of that. So in the second edit, I changed the word “sex” to “love” (thank you Jamie Lawrence for remixing this with record setting speed) and told some of the love stories of Zeno Mountain Farm.  Valentine’s Day is a capitalist, self-seeking, often self-loathing piece of bullshit of a day. This video is an effort to offset the emphasis we have on romance equaling self-worth. It’s meant to balance out the self-seeking with gratitude. And as for the capitalism, this video cost $0 to make and I think it’s pretty damn great. We don’t need more love. We just need to ask more questions and learn how to support the one’s we’re with. What’s next for MuMu in 2023? I’m touring and working on my first album now. It’s a painful and incredible experience.  --- Please consider becoming a member so we can keep bringing you stories like this one. ◎ https://chorus.fm/features/mumu-honeymoon-love-video-premiere/

[kiame-sama]

One of your posts were in your A/B/O AU where the Zoldyck family has an Omega. I'd like to know a little a lot more about that; how did they convince the Chairman to give his blessing (since you wrote that he didn't sell them), their dynamic and role in the family, how the Zoldycks first met them and decided this was the Omega they wanted, what their interactions with the butlers are like, if they're mated to anyone in the family - and if so who or if they're like a pack Omega (I can't remember if this was said in your AU stories - I'm currently re-reading your works though), how often does the Chairman touch base with them to make sure they're being treated well, if the family ever gets into fights over them, do they have a sexual relationship with any of the adults in the family, and what would happen if Chrollo did get his hands on them? Hope this isn't too long an ask - as always, write (or don't write) about the topics you want to.

Chairman Netero actually was the one to extend the offer first. He is an Apex Alpha and has kept his Omega grandchild safe from ALL others due to the way omegas are treated more like property.

When an omega remains with family members into adulthood, they actually don't go into heat. This is called "delayed heats" and is actually quite dangerous for the omega. The body of an omega needs to go through heat cycles due to intense build up of estrogen in the hypothalamus, the act of being mated basically releases those hormones and helps the body remove excess. The same is true for testosterone in the pituitary gland for Alphas, causing their ruts. By delaying these heats or ruts, it can be damaging to the affected party as there is no release of these built up hormones. The longer it is delayed, the more these hormones build up, until they eventually become too much and can cause extreme damage to the brain, making the affected become brain-dead.

Netero's grandchild was past the point other omegas (who also had repressed heats) had died from, so time was of the essence. He needed to find a proper alpha he approved of and the only family of apex alphas he knew of were the Zoldycks. He even asked his grandchild first before reaching out to them to be potential mates.

They are mated to Zeno, Silva, Kikyo, and Illumi. Maha would be a mate, but he feels it is not right for him to take on such a young mate especially at his age. He does still spend time with the omega though. All four mates are sexual partners to the omega, hence Maha's stance on not being one of the omega's mates.

Fights are VERY common among the apex alphas of the family, Maha, Zeno, Silva, Illumi, and Killua simply because apex alphas will always clash regardless of familial status. It is ingrained into the DNA of every rank to want to be in the company of an omega and the alphas will fight over who gets to spend time with the omega. Zeno, Silva, and Illumi are much more aggressive towards each other because they share the omega as a mate and will fight for dominance to see who gets to actually mate the omega that day.

Kikyo is a Beta, but she is also the female head of house, so she has authority to access the omega. Kikyo doesn't have heats or ruts and is less driven to sexual frustration than the other three when their omega is in heat. She is the main caregiver for the omega during heats as omegas only want to be with their mates during heat and will not be able to care for themselves while in such a state.

The omega is allowed to check in with. Netero at any and all times, but does not do so during heats (for obvious reasons). Usually it is every other day because Netero does truly and honestly care about his grandchild and their happiness. He is a platonic yandere and it broke his heart to have to give his precious grandchild up even though it was for their own good. Netero was extremely antsy that first heat because it lasted for longer due to being delayed (about 45-50 days when heats are usually 4-6 days) and that meant no contact for that time. He can visit whenever he wishes (he is a friend to the family, after all) but he usually calls ahead just to make sure he doesn't visit while the omega is in heat due to the protective nature of an omega's mates during heat and it will likely mentally scar him to see his precious child in such a state.

[narrators-journal]

Hello, I really like your work! and i would like to know if you can make yandere killua and yandere illumi fighting each other for the reader. The reader is a friend of Killua and is the same age as him, 18 years old.

Alright! This might be a bit iffy in parts because I never write actual confrontations, but I hope it's enjoyable! I couldn't really slip in some real yandere behavior, so I kinda implied it to keep things short lol.

Killua'd known you for a while now, about two years, from the age of 16 to now, his eighteenth birthday, and he liked you quite a bit. Because of this, the silver-haired man had begun to keep an even stricter eye on you than he had in the past. That's why you were tagging along to Killua's family home with him and Gon to let his family celebrate so that he could keep you safe and close. Besides, he'd rather you met Illumi under his watch than on the roads and by complete chance. So, Alluka was safely in a secure hotel room and you were walking up to the gates to Hades with him and Gon. "You sure you can't just do this over the phone?" You asked, your (e/c) eyes swimming with concern for him, it made his stomach flutter with butterflies. "Nah, my mom would have a fit if I didn't come home for my eighteenth birthday. But, if they try to introduce me to a 'nice girl', we run." That made you and Gon both giggle, but nod. Despite it being silly, the three of you knew it was highly likely. It would be too much to ask that Illumi and Milluki be the favored ones. Killua thought bitterly as he spotted the gates to Hades up ahead, but no. He and Illumi were something akin to the favorites out of his five siblings, the most 'loved' was Killua, he was the heir, so of course he was expected to breed and carry on the line, but Illumi was the eldest, so he too was expected to find a wife and have children. It was an awful fate that some part of Killua, deep down, felt sorry for his brother over, but it was a small portion.

With a firm shake of his head, Killua shooed the thoughts away and huffed at the doors that he now stood in front of, "We'll do our best to get out quickly," Gon chirped, giving the white-haired assassin a confident smile, which he returned, "Yeah! Real quick," he confirmed, before leading them to the testing gates and easily opening them all. "Y'know (y/n), each of those doors is supposed to be 2 tons each? and each bigger one is twice the weight of the corresponding one!" Gon boasted, bringing an astounded look to your face, "Holy shit, really?! Isn't that...128 tons though?" Gon nodded "Yep! Killua can open them all," he boasted, beaming with pride in his friend, ignoring the pink-cheeked glare Killua threw his way as they walked onto the mountain.

As to be expected, the Zoldycks had sent Gotoh, their head butler, with a car, so the trio was spared the miles of walking it took to get to the actual main house. So, instead, they spent the ride talking and joking, which helped to combat the knot of dread in Killua's stomach. Something just told him that this visit wasn't going to end well, but he couldn't say why he felt that way. When he got inside the manor, he got his answer.

It wasn't that he and Illumi were still on bad terms, he'd tentatively begun to mend fences with his eldest brother at sixteen after years of blubbering and pestering from his mother, but the way Illumi's soulless eyes locked onto you when he spotted you did not sit well with the silver-haired Zoldyck. However, his mother tackled him before he could stop his brother from approaching you and striking up a conversation. The only comfort he got was in knowing you were talking to him almost solely out of the need to be polite, you'd been warned enough about the manipulative snake to know to be wary. "you've grown so much! I barely recognize you anymore," Kikyo half squealed and half chided as if Killua could help himself growing to be Illumi's height, maybe a bit more, but the man just rolled his icy blue eyes, staying quiet to avoid his mother shrieking at him about how she was a good mother who loved him or something.

After his mother was done fussing at him, Killua returned to you, sticking close to you and Gon so he didn't lose his cool, doing so would only lengthen how long they'd have to stay. However, he also came over to interrupt Illumi's conversation with you, "Hey, (y/n), ya doing okay?" he asked, not bothering to hide his concern about his brother, which got him a pointed look from said brother, "Oh, yeah, just been chatting with your brother." you hummed, and while he could tell you were still wary, it was far less rigid as it was before. Of fucking course he'd do this bullcrap he thought, scanning over you to ensure his older sibling hadn't stuck you with a needle. Thankfully he hadn't, so that meant Illumi'd just charmed you. Disgusting.

Nonetheless, he bit back the urge to grab you and run and instead just talked to you and slowly led you away from Illumi. After that, things mellowed out for Killua and the day wasn't as much of a nightmare as he'd thought it would be, though that was mostly because he hung out with Gon and you more than his family. That wasn't to say he wasn't polite to his siblings, especially Kalluto, and nice to his parents, but he kept a distance from them. He especially kept a distance from Illumi, and he made sure you did the same so that the assassin couldn't put a needle in you or charm you anymore. However, Illumi approached him around evening, when you'd been drug off by Kikyo to 'have a chat' aka be interrogated for knowing her son so well. "I know why you avoid me nowadays," Illumi hummed in his usual bored, almost-sleepy voice as he watched the tv and acted as if he didn't notice his younger brother's evil look. "but what bugs me right now, is you keeping (y/n) away from me. You know that I need a partner, your friend is a viable option, you're just being rude to stop me from at least trying to date her." He continued, and Killua could almost taste the annoyance in his deadpan brother's aura, but all it did was put a spark of malicious joy in his soul. "First, my friends shouldn't be options for you, second, quit fucking talking about them like they're a piece of meat. (y/n) is a fucking human, not a damned broodmare for you." he pointed out in as cool of a tone as he could manage, both so no malice slips into his aura and affects Gon, who was next to him, and to further annoy Illumi. "Is it because you have a crush on her? No offense, Kill, but that won't stop me from making a move if she's available. they're very cute, and I wouldn't mind having her for myself." the dead-eyed man said coldly, staring down at the younger man.

For a moment or two after that, Killua and Illumi gave each other lethal looks, having a silent argument that was so palpable that Gon finally got up and moved, knowing better than to try and intervene or help his friend with family spats. It turned out the dark haired boy had the right idea, because almost as soon as he'd gotten up, the two went at each other like a pair of hostile dogs.

Killua was swiftly thrown to the ground by his older brother, but since he was no longer twelve, Killua's punch in response did actual damage instead of being ignored. Though he still stood no chance against him, Killua did his best to punch, kick, and bite his brother, managing to roll him over and slam his head into the floor before he retaliated with a punch to the throat. Meanwhile, Gon, Milluki, and the other siblings watched and cheered, either for Illumi or killua, encouraging them or throwing out advice for how to win the fight until Silva and Zeno finally came in and pried the two brothers apart. They ended up having to hold the two apart, because as soon as they were on their feet, Killua kicked his brother in the stomach and was nearly yanked off his feet as a result. "That is enough." Silva snapped, his voice not loud, but still firm enough to clear the wrathful red from Killua's eyes a bit and stop him from initiating another fist fight. "You two are now adults, having squabbles like this is unacceptable." he scolded, the brothers deflating in shame as they were finally released and further chewed out.

Finally, they were returned back to the social setting, and Killua was forced to put on a happy face for the rest of the night. He would've stayed pissed, maybe even attack Illumi a fifth time, but you were there, and he didn't want to worry you with the story. However, through dinner and the onslaught of gifts you and Gon helped him carry out, whenever you weren't looking or he was alone, Zeno and Silva once again would have to stop them from coming to blows before Killua finally left to go to a hotel for the night despite his mother offering his old room.

[moconut]

Whatever It Takes: A Degrassi Season 10 Retrospective (You Don't Know My Name, Pt. 1)

When I first started this review series, I talked about the Degrassi reboot and how I wasn't excited. Not because I don't love the show, but because to me it was an inevitability. Now that we've heard the reboot is off, my feelings are largely the same. No real outrage--just a certainty that it'll be back.

So in the spirit of things that die off and eventually drag themselves back out of the grave, here's the next episode: You Don't Know My Name (Part 1).

We open with Alli needling Drew with the "what are we" conversation, suggesting that people might think they're a couple since they walk around holding each other, pin each other against lockers, and play awkwardly charged games of Never Have I Ever. Drew says labels just cause problems; the problem in this case is Drew is a dog who wants all the fun parts of making out with girls and none of the boring stuff, such as conversations that don't revolve around his abs.

Meanwhile, Holly J's been sleeping off her break-up with Declan at school. Fiona finds her on the student council couch and asks whether Holly J and Declan truly broke up or were just "on a break." Holly J feels like crap either way, but luckily Fiona has a solution to her new pimple: the Zeno. If you didn't watch TeenNick in the 2010's, you probably have no idea what this is. It's some dubious acne removal thing that was advertised during every single commercial break, and I'm forever convinced there's some nefarious product placement at work here.

Alli tries to convince KC and Jenna that Drew is basically her boyfriend because he makes out with her, walks her to class, and calls her cute. I like that those are Alli's sole standards. Jenna and KC gush over each other, much to Alli's disgust. Careful, you two! You might get pregnant!

Remember that plot about Dave being terrible at singing and even worse at not having a huge ego about it? Well, that whole thing was pointless because the band slam the Three Tenners entered has been cancelled to make room for other plots. Sav forcefully ejects Dave into the C plot before commiserating with Holly J. She suggests holding a dance instead, because nothing ever goes wrong at Degrassi dances.

The Three Tenners are in Media Immersion class, where Connor is struggling to wake up from his late night of gaming. Wesley and Dave express their concerns, which is weird to me because isn't staying up all night to game like the most normal thing a teen boy could do?

Because no major character is allowed to be single on this show, Sav shows up to flirt with Holly J while Fiona looks on in relatable distaste. Remember a few episodes ago when Holly J made Sav think Anya was pregnant with his baby in order to sabotage his bid for presidency? Apparently he doesn't.

Alli gets crowned Queen of Worst Taste in Guys when she interrupts history class to ask Drew to the Harvest Hoedown (haha!). Drew brushes her off, saying he needs to study and getting a little nasty with her when she doesn't get the hint. Strange, you'd think Drew would jump at the chance to attend something with "hoe" in the title.

We're introduced to Realm of Doom, the totally-not-World-of-Warcraft game Connor's been spending all his time in lately. He even has a waifu: LoveQueen16, who says their game is nothing like the reality of her life. I would hope so, because they literally just exploded a building.

Alli continues to willfully misinterpret Drew's shitty signals by saying she understands he's under a lot of pressure and presenting a solution: she'll write his essay for him. Drew is understandably insulted and presumably astounded at how clueless Alli is being, brushing off her offer.

Holly J and Sav happily continue to plan their Hoedown (haha!). Holly J's zit is even gone! "Fiona's never getting her Zeno back," she vows, which probably earned the show another several thousand dollars in product placement cash. Also Sav asks Holly J on a date. This pairing came out of nowhere and is dumb.

Later that evening, Sav comes to Holly J's job to steal pretzels and stare at her as she serves tables. Her boss mistakes them as a couple as he serves them disappointing-looking nachos, and the two awkwardly giggle about how crazy that would be. Them, dating? No way that's where this plot is going!

Alli defies Drew and also common sense by submitting a flawless paper for him. Mr. Perino questions the essay's legitimacy, guilting Alli into confessing what she did. She's sent to the office and Drew is docked a letter grade, which is actually fair because I doubt he would have actually submitted his real paper on time anyway. Meanwhile, an NPC looks off impassively in the background.

Sav and Holly J are having inflation issues: they need to manually fill each helium balloon before the dance. They have fun inhaling chemicals (from the same balloon, no less! Scandalous) and it's actually pretty charming. Until, that is, Sav suddenly kisses her. Holly J immediately makes an excuse about needing to go see Fiona while Sav's balloon, metaphorically and literally, deflates in his hands.

Alli approaches Drew in the hallway, STILL not getting how badly she fucked up by joking about getting off with very little consequence. Drew rounds on her, saying Alli failed his "trial period" for being his girlfriend. After basically calling Alli dumb, he stalks off. These two make each other worse in every way.

That's it for now. We'll see whether it takes one day or six months for me to do the next one. Thanks!