#also bc just for this I missed getting an honors degree

[tkbrokkoli]

:O

[kookslastbutton]

When I Say Forever ༓ jjk (m)

✑ Summary: Today’s your wedding day and the slightly shy yet handsome, doe-eyed stranger who chased after you when you dropped your wallet on the street three years ago just happens to be the man standing before you today.

Original request: can you please write something about oc's and Jungkook's wedding? Your readers just need to witness it. We would highly appreciate it. Thank you!

pairing: jungkook x reader

genre/AU: fluff, smut, wedding au

word count: 4,696

warnings: a cute wedding where jungkook gets emotional and is very eager to be married, they get a little scolded during the ceremony ahaha, jk is romantic and prepares something very special for his lovely bride, mentions of absence of parents on oc's side (nothing gets too deep but I chose to go this route due to the very real factor that parents aren't always around), and finally sexual content bc come on it their wedding night 🥺

sexual warnings: soft dom!jk, sub!reader, swearing, explicit s*x, jk asks for consent bc yeah i don't even need to justify it, f*ngering, oral (both m. and f., multiple orgasms, dry humping, t*tty suck, heavy making out, overstimulation, possessive!kook, m*ssionary, c*wgirl, oc claws at his back which jk seems to have a kink for, a little bit of steamy rivalry at the end (just a hint), our kook is attentive even though it gets kinda rough

now playing: My You by jjk

a/n: my you has been one of my on repeat songs and im not sorry. Also, thank you for the request, i hope this is alright! Anyway pls enjoy! ❤

Dozens of cherry blossom trees are sky-high in the air, covering you as you walk down the aisle in the grass. Some of the blush pink and white blossoms shake from branches every few steps to shower over you in a cascading effect. The temperature is also perfect, a steady 68 degrees.

This is why you and Jungkook chose to marry in the spring–it was beautiful.

You look to your left, then to your right. Rows of seats filled with family, friends, and co-workers stare at you in awe. The only two people missing, however, are your parents.

With the passing of your father years ago and your mother's absence in your life since then, your half of the guest list isn’t extensive by any means. It's for those reasons that you both agreed a small wedding would be ideal.

Still, even with the minimized guest list, you find it difficult to hold eye contact with any of them. It's not because you're nervous exactly–you simply don’t believe your reality is real.

Was this another one of your silly dreams?

Are you going to wake up just as you reach the front?

You keep your eyes straight ahead and towards the man who's waiting for you with tightly clasped hands. He makes all your worries melt away in that instant.

No, you remind yourself. This isn't a dream.

The veil you’re wearing drags on the ground behind you and flows over the small train of your delicate, white gown. You chose a form-fitting sheath dress that’s made from the softest satin fabric. Its clean, sharp lines allow the semi-deep-v neckline to appear more elegant than revealing.

The closer you get the more Jungkook’s cheeks wet with his tears. He knew he was going to cry today. But he was hoping it’d happen towards the end so he could see you walking down the aisle to him without his vision blurring.

“Hi,” he whispers to you once you’re fully in front of him. He wipes his face with his thumbs as subtly as he can.

You bow to each other in greeting and, with the request to join hands from your officiant, you hand your bouquet of fresh-cut flowers to your maid of honor and place your hands in his gentler ones.

“Hi,” you reply, equally quiet and with a small smile.

Jungkook’s dark, raven hair parts in the middle with a few strands tastefully out of place. He’s wearing a black, pin-stripped suit with a matching vest and plain black tie. The white dress shirt underneath is buttoned all the way up to the top too and he’s kept all his piercings in, including his lip ring. He’s unbelievably handsome–and he’s yours.

When your officiant begins making the welcome speech, the guests settle down in their seats all at once. Yet you and Jungkook keep whispering to each other as softly as you can.

“You look amazing.” His thumbs rub soothing circles over the top of your knuckles.

“So do you.” Your gaze holds his reddened ones. The fact that he’s still on the verge of tears causes you to form watery eyes as well. But you blink them back. “I can’t believe this is happening.”

“I know. I feel the same way.” He pauses and grins at you. “Did you see who came with whom?” He gives a side-eye, gesturing at Jimin, one of his best men.

“I saw.” You and Jungkook start giggling at once because the person who Jimin brought as his plus one is perhaps the most annoying person in the world to him–your co-worker who’s had an insane crush on him for the last year. They insisted that Jimin be a “gentleman” and show them a good time while at your wedding.

“Do you think they’ll…you know,” you wiggle your eyebrows suggestively to finish the sentence.

Jungkook shakes his head lightly. “I don’t know, maybe. I can’t really bother to think about who’ll sleep with who when you’re gonna be the one under me tonight.”

Though he says it with the most sincere tone, more endearing than flirty, you swallow hard. It’s not your first time with Jungkook but you’re unsure what to expect tonight. You’ll be his wife after this.

“Why do you get to top?” you mouth.

Jungkook gives a half-smirk.“Why do you pretend to hate it?”

You open your mouth to form a response but the harsh clearing of a throat behind Jungkook orders you to stop.

“Everyone-ahem-can hear you,” Taehyung coughs. “Stop it for god sake.”

“Yes, if the bride and groom could please save the after-wedding affairs for later, we can move forward with the ceremony. Thankfully I don't see many children in the crowd today,” the officiant adds as humorously as she can and the crowd chuckles.

Oh god. You bite down on your tongue to keep from embarrassing the two of you further.

Once your officiant is able to finish her welcome speech she turns her attention to you. "__ do you want to marry Jungkook, to be your husband, to love and to cherish all the days of your life, today, tomorrow, and always? 

"I do. Yes."

She looks at Jungkook afterward. "Jungkook do you want to marry __, to be your wife, to love and to cherish all the days of your life, today, tomorrow, and always? 

He stares at you, wordless for a moment as every memory between the two of you hits him like a tidal wave. His hand starts shaking in yours, and tears start spilling from his eyes again.

"You okay?" You whisper and this time it's your turn to rub soothing circles on his hands, calming him down.

"Yeah," he sniffs. "I just never imagined myself to be standing here today. I love you so much."

Your officiant decides it's best to wait for the right time to speak but Jungkook smiles at her softly. "That means yes by the way," he jokes and the guests laugh in unison.

She turns to the ring bearer, aka Namjoon's eight-year-old son who stands on Jungkook's left by his father. "May we have the rings please?"

The boy walks over to her, hands over the small gold bands, then returns to his previous position.

"The couple will now exchange rings as a symbol of their love and devotion. I understand they have prepared their own vows thus binding promises to love, honor, and cherish one another. __, please place this ring on Jungkook’s finger and when you're ready you may begin."

You take the ring and begin slipping it on Jungkook's finger. "They say when you marry someone you become one. You consider each other in every decision, make compromises for the other, and be the strength when the other cannot. We've been together for three years now Jungkook, doing those exact things and I couldn't fathom stopping now. I love you and I promise I'll always be here next to you, however and whenever you need."

"Jungkook," your officiant hands him your ring. "Please place this ring on __’s finger and when you're ready you may begin."

"When I saw you years ago, waiting at the crosswalk, I thought you were the most beautiful and intriguing person I'd ever seen in my life." He puts the ring on your fourth finger. "And then you dropped your wallet and it gave me the best opportunity to approach you. Little did I know, the sight of a man running after would make you run too. But you took my number in the end and three years later, the love of my life is standing before me. Everything I am and have belongs to you __, always and forever."

Your officiant smiles at you both as Jungkook struggles to keep his distance from you a few seconds longer. He's been waiting for this very moment since the day you agreed to be his boyfriend. He just can't take it any longer!

"In the presence of...oh for the love of might," your officiant stops mid-sentence when she sees Jungkook shuffling his feet closer and closer towards you. "Never in my twenty years of performing marriages have I seen a groom this eager to get married. Go ahead and kiss your wife hun! Mr. and Mrs. Jeon Jungkook everyone!"

Massive grin on his face, Jungkook grabs your waist and dips you low into a romantic kiss. The crowd goes wild at the dramatic gesture, whistling and clapping behind you.

After about a million more tears, speeches, first dances, a surprise song preformed by the wedding party, and Jungkook practically ripping off the lace garter around your thigh with his teeth, the wedding festivities come to an end. But not before you both find yourself being guided to a secret place led by Taehyung.

The wedding party insisted you be blindfolded beforehand. So here you are, almost pitch black out and clinging to Jungkook's arm.

"I don't understand why I need to be blindfolded and you don't," you say.

"I'm not sure," he replies. "Maybe they got you a gift or something."

"We're here! Stop!" You hear Taehyung shout from a few feet ahead and Jungkook freezes in place. You're body jolts forward a little with the sudden pause.

"__." Jungkook calls your name softly. "Open your eyes."

You flutter your lids open and at first, the sight before you is hazy as you adjust to the night sky. But then, your jaw drops to the ground.

In front of you is a charming river surrounded by perfectly arched cherry blossoms with lanterns hanging from the branches. All the lanterns illuminate the entire length of the stream, including around the bends and curves. At the edge of the stream is a small dock where a wooden row boat floats with a set of oars inside.

"Oh my god." Your eyes trail as far down the river as you can. You've only ever seen this in movies, so you're incredibly overwhelmed by the sight. "Jungkook, are we-are we going in there?"

He watches as you openly gape at the scene in front of you. "What do you think? Do you like it?"

You whip your head in his direction. "Are you kidding? It's amazing! Did you know about this?"

His big grin tells you everything you need to know.

"He planned everything himself," Namjoon speaks up. "Come on, your boat's waiting. It'll take you all the way to one of the best hotels in Seoul. I know you're going on your honeymoon tomorrow but we thought a night up in a five-star hotel might be nice. Unless you want to go back to Jungkook's house of course but...we kinda already grabbed your suitcases for the trip and had them put in your room."

"You're serious?"

"Dead serious __."

You snake your arms out Jungkook's arm and swing them around him. "I can't thank you enough for doing this, Joon."

He places a gentle hand on your upper back. "Of course, but like I said. Jungkook planned everything so you should thank him more than me." He laughs and breaks away from you when he sees the younger man eyeing the two of you excruciatingly close. "I think your husband would like you back now."

Jungkook comes up behind you and sneakily slips your hand in his tatted one. "Are you ready?" He gestures towards the boat.

You nod and he pulls you towards the dock, helping you into the boat first when you approach it. He sits across from you after and grabs the oars of the boats, lowering them into the water one at a time.

"Wait!" Taehyung lunges over the edge of the boat with something small and black in his palm. "Don't forget this." He clips a tiny microphone to his shirt and you scrunch your eyebrows.

"What's this about?" You ask.

Taehyung only half-smirks at you and backs away from the boat. "We'll see you when you come back from the honeymoon okay? Have fun! But please, for the sanity of us all, don't text us any details. In the words of the wise, keep the private things private!"

Jungkook laughs and starts rowing the boat forward and down the stream. You, on the other hand, wave goodbye to everyone as you drift further and further away from the dock.

"So, husband," you sit with your elbows on your knees. "What's the mic for?"

Jungkook doesn't reply but shushes you instead. He tests the mic a couple of times before soft music comes from either side of you. Apparently, there are stereos lined down the banks of the river.

When he starts singing, you cover your mouth in overwhelming joy.

"Summer has already spread in the air

Breeze is already blowing.

The last cold snap is going out

The days were getting longer and longer

But my days were still going on and on and on

I got wet in the sunshower, I looked up at the night sky..."

At this moment the lanterns start twinkling, reflecting like raindrops in the water. You look all around you, taking in the change of atmosphere. Jungkook's cool eyes focus on you intently as he continues serenading you.

"It was quite a lonely night

In the blink of an eye, the dark faded out

Blooming under the sunlight

Memories with me and you..."

The boat rows left and you peer over your shoulder. Taehyung and the rest of the wedding party are barely visible by now. When you look ahead again, you see that you're about to go under a stone bridge. On the other side are more cherry blossom trees and a glimpse of downtown Seoul.

"All these lights are colored in by you

All these times are precious due to you

Four seasons have passed with you

Four scents were left 'cause of you

All the reasons why I can laugh out

All the reasons why I sing this song

Thankful to be by your side now

I'll try to shine brighter than now..."

Jungkook rows the two of you closer to the city as he finishes his song, passing a number of other couples taking night strolls together. The wind blows a little but it doesn't make you shiver at all—his voice warms your soul.

And when you lean in to kiss him once the boat reaches the dock near the hotel, fingers grazing his cheeks, your body yearns to be near his.

It takes little to no time for the two of you to find your hotel room. Jungkook swipes your keycard in the door and in you both go, your hand shamelessly yanks at his tie.

He presses you up the back of the door once it's locked shut and kisses you with a fiery passion. It's different from all the other times; neither rough nor soft, as he sucks on your bottom lip, eagerly begging to deepen the kiss.

"Kook," you let out a muffled moan when his tongue finds its way into your mouth. It's a wrestle at first, your tongues toying with each other. And once you get the hint that he's not about to back down you start threading your fingers through his hair.

"I love it when you do that," he groans and pushes himself against your body, grinding his growing bulge against your center.

You whine against his lips and grind your hips back into his. "I know you do," you tease and a strong pair of hands wander your waist before traveling behind to grip your ass.

You yelp when he squeezes your cheeks and starts rutting himself into you faster. He moves his pillowy lips to the side of your neck too, peppering you with kisses from the the sensitive area right below your earlobe and all the way down to your collarbone.

"Fuck," he grunts, nothing short of frustrated, when your dress stops him from kissing down any further. The hands gripping your ass move up to find the zipper of your gown. "Please, baby, can I remove it?"

"Yes, go ahead," you nod and retract your hands from his hair to let the gown fall off your shoulders. Jungkook watches lustfully as your bare breasts are revealed to him little by little. He's seen them a million times but each time is always like his first, his eyes never fail to dilate.

"Perfect," you hear him whisper under his breath. And when the gown pools to the ground around your feet with a heavy thump, he can't hold himself back any longer.

He needs you.

One by one he starts tearing off his suit jacket, then his vest and leather belt until he's left standing in nothing else left except his black underwear. His muscles bulge without even having to flex and his pecs are more than solid.

If he weren't the love of your life, you'd say he was damn intimidating. Yet the pleasure you get from simply viewing his perfectly toned body is ridiculous and what pushes you further is the gold band wrapped around his fourth finger.

Jungkook must be feeling the same as his hands are back on your hips in the seconds following, pushing you to the wall adjacent to the door and attacking the area near your collarbone again with his plushy lips. You whine when his large pecs rub against your pebbled nipples.

"God what have you been lifting these day Jeon? Half of Seoul?" You rest your hands on his biceps which tense at the touch.

"Uh uh," he tsks in response. "Can't call me that anymore. We share the same name now." He kisses your shoulder then moves his mouth over to a nipple. He licks one first, teasing it with the tip of his tongue until you moan for him to keep going.

"You have such soft boobies," he comments before finally sucking on one. Your head falls back from the pleasure it sends up your spine.

"Do you have to say it like that?"

He switches to the other breast, licking and sucking it firmly like the he'd done previously. "What's wrong with boobies? I like the word."

You chuckle and decide to let him have his fun. Pick you battles __, you hum to yourself.

Jungkook tugs at the string of your underwear after placing one last kiss atop each boob. He slowly pulls the thin material down your legs at your consent and you step out from them.

"Lean against the wall and throw your leg over my shoulder," he tells you on bended knees.

You do as he says, swinging a leg over his shoulder. The movement has his head face to face with your cunt which is not in the least bit dry from all the teasing and grinding earlier.

Jungkook sticks a finger in his mouth, wetting it with his spit and then rubs it back and forth between your folds. The lubrication mixes with your own arousal.

"Jungkook," you whine when he doesn't sink his finger in right away, despite the fact that you're well prepared for it.

He blinks at you through his lashes with a devious smirk. "What?" He asks. "You don't like this?"

"I do but I need more. Please," you beg. "Fingers. In me. Please."

He groans at the way your voice seems to crack the more you beg. Well, he's made you wait long enough. Jungkook pushes his finger into your velvet walls all at once, dragging it back and forth in search of your sweet spot.

He knows he's found it when you instantly buck your hips and the leg that's over his shoulder reflexively clamps down on him.

"Right here?" He curls his finger inside you and it has your pussy already throbbing for him. You don't even have to ask for a second finger before he does the honors himself, sliding another into you then proceeding to make a scissoring motion with both digits. "Or here?" He asks again.

"Anywhere," you barely make out through your gasps. "Just don't stop what you're doing."

"What if I wanna lick your pussy?" He pumps his fingers faster all while maintaining focus on your face. "Make you come all over my tongue."

"God Kook, do whatever you want," you reply and it's all the push he needs to remove his fingers from out of you to replace it with his mouth. "Fuck!" You cry as he desperately licks long stripes up your slippery folds, tongue dipping inside for additional pleasure.

He repeats the motion several times until he decides its not enough and sucks on your clit.

"Oh, that feels so good, fuck, fuck Jungkook," you moan with eyes closed and a shaky breath.

Your legs start trembling as your first orgasm of the night builds inside. It gets closer and closer as Jungkook works faster and faster before finally, the cord inside you breaks free.

Jungkook happily swallows as much of your cum as he can. He uses his wrist to wipes his mouth after, cleaning up any leftover.

"First time eating my wife out," he starts, guiding your leg over his shoulder back on the ground. "What a fucking turn on."

Jungkook stands up and pulls you into an embrace with both hands, your bare bodies press tight against each other. Then, without any warning, he swoops up your legs with one hand supporting your lower back and lifts your into his arms.

"Kook!" You call his name in suddeness of the action.

"Yes? What is it wife?" He carries you to the large, king size bed that's covered in rose petals and lays you on top. His handsome face leans over you with careful, attentive eyes while a hand reaches for one of the soft pillows nearby to slip under your head.

It's now that the weight of the moment hits you, as if you've just doven off a steep cliff and head first into the rushing rapids of the ocean.

"I love you," you say.

Jungkook sticks his thumbs in the band of his underwear and pushes it down until he can easily remove them. He's fully hard when he crawls over top of you after, and places his hands on either side of your head.

"I love you too." He lowers his head to capture your lips into a deep kiss. "Now," he continues, sitting up on his knees and shimmying his thighs up your frame. "I think I might need some help here."

He grips his pulsating length, tan tip leaking with pre-cum. You widen your mouth gladly and he shoves his length to the back of your throat.

"Mm!" You gag but to say you hate it would be a lie.

Jungkook doesn't move at first, letting you get used to the weight of his cock on your tongue first. He bites his lip as you hallow your cheeks the best you can.

"I don't want to come, I just want it wet okay?" He tells you and you nod in understanding. "Fuck, so good," he lets out a throaty growl after the first thrust.

You suck him as hard as you can as he fucks your mouth at a steady pace, making sure his cock will be nice and well-lubricated with your spit this time.

"Can't believe we're married," he thrusts faster, teeth clenching together. "My wife, mine forever. No one else can have you. I won't let them."

You blink your glassy eyes at him, thighs struggling to rub together due to the arousal pooling between your legs for the tenth time tonight.

You love him so fucking much.

Jungkook pulls himself out of your mouth while you're in thought, a string of spit following. He backs himself down your body until he can properly hover over you in a straddling position.

"Legs up," he commands and you wrap them around his waist in a criss-cross position. His wetted length finds your entrance with little guidance and pushes forward, stretching your walls so deliciously well.

"Oh my god," you shudder as his cock sinks all the way in thanks to both of you being incredibly worked up and lubricated. Your hands fly under his arms after two thrusts, to grip his back. "Fuck, you're so deep Kook."

"I know, holy shit," he grunts and beats himself into you. He likes the feeling of your body bouncing up and down underneath him so leans down on his elbows to fuck you faster and harder. "I think this might be the deepest I've been in you baby, so wet for me—fuck!"

He moans loudly when your nails claw his back. "Shit I'm sorry!" You relax your fingers immediately when he winces at the slight pain.

"No," he nips at your jaw. "I like it, keep doing it. Mark me up." He snaps his hips into yours and you claw at his back again, harsher than the last time; not enough to hurt him but enough to make him moan in your ear over and over again.

"Jungkook! Too much," you pant as he burries his head in your neck, trailing hot open mouth kisses to the area. "It's too much, I'm gonna come!"

"Fuck, that's the goal baby!"

"Yeah but, don't wanna come so soo—"

He shuts you up with his tongue shoving between you lips, kissing you with a purpose. You's body squirms at the pleasure and you find yourself clenching around his thick length that yes, twitches in response.

"Three years together and you still think I'll give you one round and call it quits. Since when baby?" He groans as he feels himself achingly close to his high (you too). "Tell me, since fucking when?" He emphasizes once more.

You're too lost in how close you are to your second orgasm to give him an answer.

"That's right, never."

One hard thrust later and you come on his length. It takes little time before he releases in you as well, yet he continues his pace.

"That's one down," Jungkook says, riding out both your orgasms which slowly works you up to another. "Not including any eating out. And if my memory serves our record is five. Don't you think we should surpass that now that we're legally bonded to each other Mrs. Jeon? In sickness and in health was it?"

"I'm still trying to recover from the first two orgasms I had tonight, including the fingering and you relentless dry humping."

"Baby," he coos. "My sweet baby, come here." With both arms Jungkook lifts your body with his until you're both in an upright, seated position. Your legs that were once wrapped around his waist rest on the mattress as he thrust up into your cunt. "Don't you know I just want to make you feel good? Why recover when you can be wrecked so heavenly over and over again?"

You moan and squeeze your hands on his shoulder. Jungkook studies your face, maintaining slow, calculated thrusts into you.

"Come for me again," he says.

And you do, sticky white liquid dripping down to the base of his cock and onto the sheets under you.

"You enjoyed that didn't you?" He smirks. "Let's see you get on all fours now. I'd love to see how well my wife takes it from behind."

You catch him off guard by pushing on his chest and guiding him flat on his back. "Mm no," you refuse him. "I think I'd like to get a taste of my husband as a bottom instead."

Jungkook's cock hardens inside you and his fingers settle around your hips as he smirks up at you. "Go ahead then," he tests. "Try getting yourself off."

"You think I can't do it?" You narrow your eyes and grind forward on his cock, earning you a deep growl from your new husband.

"We'll see how long you'll last before I have to flip you on your back and take over," he spats. "But good luck beautiful."

With a huff and determination in your eyes, you start a strong pace. Jungkook watches you with lustful eyes as you bounce on him– enjoying the show a little too much.

a/n: Thanks for reading! Lmk what you think 🥰

Masterlist

no reposting, copying, or translating my work– © kookslastbutton

[sasukesgucciflops]

Here I am back on my John Marston BS.

I pointed this out before ab how ppl loved calling John “watered down” but I’m also seeing people forget that he was also put on a very high fucking pedestal and had no idea how to handle it. In other words; he was the gifted kid who got burnt out after everyone expected everything from him. John never expected to be seen as such. He actually preferred to not be held to such a degree. I’m sick and tired of people feeding into the “John’s a golden boy” “John’s a piece of shit” narrative. Clearly these people have only seen RDR2 and have no clue about everything in RDR1 and yes I’m giving an attitude so y’all better catch it.

Here’s my John Marston character analysis and this is only about one aspect of him. (Wait until you see every other aspect bc I’ve literally dissected this man like a frog oops)

He never fucking asked for it. In fact, he didn’t expect jack shit from anybody. If anything, people used him. People used him up. You see it plainly in rdr1, he’s being used to hunt down his old partners. To find his old partners he’s gotta ask the sheriff, what does the sheriff do? He uses him to handle some lowlife gangs around the county. The sheriff ACCIDENTALLY—not even voluntarily—reveals someone that ends up somewhat helping him out. West Dickens—and what does he do? Uses him. Seth? Uses him. Travels over to another country, what do they do? USE HIM!

Okay, so rdr2—if you couldn’t get the picture already—John was one of Dutch’s MAIN PAWNS. That man raised John to USE HIM. John was young and had lots of energy and he was gullible enough to let Dutch do whatever with his naivety. The most fucked up thing about all of it, not only about how (almost) everyone saw him as a pawn, not as a genuine friend, saw him only for his uses;

John didn’t care. He knew he was being used but he didn’t care. Yes it bothers him and again he’s fully aware he’s being ran around in circles by all these people; it doesn’t matter. He sees himself as someone who is replaceable. He’s expendable. It’s whatever. He was always made to think this and perhaps he knew that it was his fate to be all used up and thrown out like it was nothing. And that’s what ended up happening.

No, he wasn’t a perfect father. He SHOULDVE done much much better about that. Just for that I let anti’s breathe a little because in Jack’s younger years, hell no John wasn’t a good father! John was in denial, busy trying to live up to his dreams of being someone he isn’t. On that note, John slowly realized that Abigail and Jack were probably the only ones that didn’t see him as a pawn; they just wanted him to be present and that causes him to do a 180. To him, it was worth dying for them. Maybe he felt as if he owed them a debt that could never be repayed—it’s almost like he expresses this to Jack a dozen different times. “I’m sorry, Son. I’m not going anywhere.” And “I know I wasn’t around a lot for you but I’m trying to make up for that”. He becomes viscerally aware of the damage of his absence (as he should) and it becomes something he fears he’ll never get to make up for.

Abigail never wanted to use him. She just wanted HIM. Jack—OF COURSE never wanted to use him, he wanted a FATHER. Honorable mention, but Arthur never saw him as a pawn either. In fact, he was well aware of how John was being treated, even mentioning it to him canonically, along the lines of, and I’m loosely quoting this, “At first you’ll be a prize pony until you become a work horse”. These people become so important to John—among others such as Bonnie, Charles, Sadie, even Uncle—because they never tried to use. him. John was more than expendable to them, he was worth something to them and for that he loved them and felt as if he would owe them for eternity.

I truly can’t believe some of y’all completely miss that whole point because it’s written EVERYWHERE it’s literally how John’s story goes and we experience it with him. His story is so fucking tragic and yes, while Arthur was the prime example of “having a doomed narrative from the start”, people don’t talk about how John is literally in the same boat. That man was always doomed, by his friends, the people he would try to call family—he was raised all the way up just to be put down…. THAT’S the story of John fucking Marston.

[likesunsetorange]

Hey I was just wondering what are some of your favorite eremika fics. I was hoping to get some that were multi chapter :)

OMG I LOVE THIS QUESTION!!!! linking my bookmarks on ao3 bc i have a bunch of favs in there and then here are some others i remember!! also my fic recs tag here on tumblr has so many by my amazing writer moots!!!

literally anything by dark_titanium she writes the funniest fucking fics and they’re so fun!!! switch is mc and a fandom fav too!!! she’s also here on tumblr and her tumblr is so fun @sunlightandsuffering !!!!

how to coexist by spoiler_arlert is probably one of my all time fav eremika fics and karsyn was actually one of my first friends i made in the fandom :’) i hope she comes back soon i miss her sm!!!

the promised princess by @dead-dolphins i could write an essay about how amazing this fic is like it’s truly novel quality and ro is so fucking talented like i’ve cried so many times reading tpp it’s literally so special to me like i literally adore it with my whole little heart!! i never really read fantasy but tpp made me adore the genre and im even starting asoiaf bc of it!!! i also just love ro so much and i always feel honored to be apart of helping with such an amazing fic!! even if it’s just smth as small as helping with grammar :’)

how to be by infintify is another one of my favs it’s lowkey super angsty and not a lot of people talk about it but it’s super super good!!!!

can’t get enough and the entire 5 star universe by @irememberthedark is my roman empire actually!!! i remember reading that fic before i joined the fandom or wrote dol like i read it sm times and i love that universe sm i tell kb that all the time 😭

touch by fenroargreyfront this is the first em fic i ever read!! it’s only four chapters but im convinced it was the perfect intro to eremika for me and why i love them so much!!!!

degrees of sleeplessness a teacher au!!!!!

a beginners guide to destroying the moon by @darlingkirstein angsty but the em relationship is super sweet and i’ve always loved the summary of it it lives rent free in my head!!!

i could list so many more but if you want any specific recs feel free to ask :))

[fantasticalleigh]

thoughts on bridgerton season 3 part 2

MASSIVE spoilers ahead, i'm really annoyed so this is going to come out very salty!

TLDR: this season was largely a disappointment. part 1 is better than part 2.

-i've said it before and i'll say it again: this is an ensemble show that ultimately suffers for how large its cast is, how short each season is, how cheap netflix is, and how poor the writing is. the actors are great and do well with what they're given. the stories in and of themselves are largely compelling. but they need space and time to be told properly. eight episodes between 10+ characters is not enough.

-unhinged/in love colin from the books was sorely missed. the book is problematic yadda yadda but i prefer it at this point. instead for pretty much three out of four episodes in part two, he was just angry or sad and that was it. he felt so flat.

-i find it hilarious that debling just fucked off after rejecting penelope. he didn't even stick around to try and court cressida, who was clearly more than willing to take penelope's place?? he literally could have solved all her problems and that could have saved an incredible amount of screen time that should have gone to Colin/Penelope.

-i love the way they bridged portia and penelope's relationship. also to a lesser degree, her sisters. prudence not being so cunty anymore was nice but felt a little off, i think she needed more screentime with pen to show that she finally realizes what a bad sister she was and that she's genuinely sorry. one quick little comment "i was being honest" (or whatever it was) to me, didn't feel like enough. but i'm still glad they came around.

-violet/marcus and by extension, agatha. i'm glad violet and agatha finally had a heart to heart/ conversation that was about them and not the young people. when they affirmed that they were there for each other no matter what and used each other's given names? precious. i teared up. i love their friendship. (also don't come at me for what may have happened during Queen Charlotte bc i never finished it lol)

-the queen is probably my least favorite character. she used to have funny/kind moments but now it feels like she is just rude and dismissive and mean towards everyone. i can't even like her in a GirlBoss way because all we see from season to season is how other people manipulate her. Agatha manipulates her. Grimsby manipulates her. Lady Whistledown manipulates her. she was kind for francesca for a couple of days and then went sour when she realized francesca chose someone else. i get that she's jaded from season 2 but idk i don't enjoy her scenes at all anymore. she crashes the wedding breakfast to accuse the bridgertons, belittles the Mondriches ball at the start, complains/belittles all the debutants trying to impress her, doesn't care about the events being hosted in her honor. i loved her in seasons 1-2 but now she's just boring and one note.

-eloise finally admitted she was reckless/in the wrong about the Theo situation. that was nice. and she finally admitted befriending cressida was a poor choice. do i sense character growth at last?? but i'm still a little unhappy about how rudely she ditched Cressida once she and Penelope made up. Hey, this new friend of yours is distraught because of her shit home life and is about to be married off to some old, austere codger and you literally don't care? i genuinely felt so bad for cressida. she is a creature pushed into a corner lashing out for any way to escape and nobody (understandably, bc she makes bad choices) wants to help her. but eloise keeps saying that cress surprised her with how she was the only one to show her kindness when she was a social outcast and now the same is happening to Cressida and yet instead of repaying the favor, Eloise abandons her.

Eloise even goes so far to say that Cressida used her. Did she not also use Cressida? She admitted she befriended her to be petty towards Penelope. And she clearly stuck with Cressida out of boredom/reluctance to mingle with the other ladies their age because she found them beneath her. Eloise is still a hypocrite. I thought she'd taken a step forward but she's in the same place.

did cressida deserve help? not particularly considering the blackmail/fake identity, history of bullying. but does she also deserve to be married off like that and cut off like that by her asshole dad? also no.

with all that talk about running away i genuinely was rooting for C to run away, but i'm disappointed it didn't happen. i guess it makes sense within her character--she's always been a caged creature--i don't think running away ever came to mind, even if she didn't want to be shipped off to Wales with her aunt. she's strong but doesn't (yet) have the resolve/ferocity of someone like marina who was willing to run away with colin to elope in gretna green.

frankly i found cressida's story the most compelling in season 3 so far.

-benedict. if i have to watch ONE more sex scene for Ben i'm going to scream. wowwee, he had another threesome! and no more queerbaiting--he finally had sex with a man! <--that part is at least noteworthy for his character--but genuinely--i don't really care when his only storyline this season is that all he does is have sex. there are far more compelling stories needing attention right now and yet we get another freaking sex barrage with benedict. Colin and Penelope were robbed here and i don't think it's unreasonable to be annoyed that a B-tier ensemble character got more sexy time than them. and for what purpose? all we get out of ben's enlightenment is that it's ok to be gay and that he's not ready for serious commitment. which is fine and dandy except that that was already drilled into our heads since season 1. i feel like my time was wasted here because i already watched him do the same damn things over and over for THREE SEASONS by now.

AND FOR THAT MATTER:

if they really wanted to show any sense of growth for benedict they could have had him be brutally honest to Tilley and say something like:

"I'm having fun with our arrangement. I am open to seriously committing to someone someday...but I don't think you are that person."

what a world of a difference that would make, wouldn't it? it would show he's coming closer to being ready to meet Sophie but that he's still not quite ready to give up his old ways. i truly believe his season is next and frankly it wouldn't feel so insulting to watch his repetitive storyline if they had written better dialogue in that ONE scene.

(Jess + Shonda, I'm available any time if you want to talk.)

-T.S's You Belong with Me playing during a fucking wedding scene was a choice. All the options in the world and you pick a song about high school jealousy??? Babydoll I could pick five better options off my general playlist. across all three seasons, there's been so many bad cover choices imo.

-Coldplay's Yellow being Polin's song was an actual choice I will salute. Beautiful moment.

-the whole whistledown speech at the end where pen reveals herself was extremely flat to me and left me so bloody disappointed. someone brought this up on reddit and i agree so hard it hurts--why wasn't colin up there by her side? book colin would have VAULTED up over everyone just to be there with her and protect her. instead we get mopey Colin watching her from below. i need to rewatch it again but it felt like there was hardly any reaction from the ton to her speech. it felt like they shrugged their shoulders when she was finished and resumed the ball. my mouth was agape at that--you're telling me not one of the attendees would have rushed up and said "omg it was you??" "how did you do it?" "i can't believe it!" or something to that effect. the bridgertons already had that reaction so it would've been effective for literally anyone in the ton to show some amazement.

-ngl, i also feel quite cheated that Penelope was never celebrated in the way she deserved. yes, she got her wedding and the man she always wanted--but creating/maintaining the Whistledown enterprise is a huge accomplishment. individually there was praise from those closest to her but really there was such a huge element of shame and punishment surrounding it that really bothered me. yeah, she said some mean things but she did it because she was severely neglected/ostracized from her own community. there was no acknowledgment of that at all (that i can recall. once again i should do a rewatch but whatever) and that pains/angers me. not one person beside her mother took a moment to think or say, 'i treated you badly and caused you pain. i'm sorry.' instead they just focused on making penelope apologize again and again when she had only reacted from years of pain, which nobody even deigned to acknowledge.

wasn't there a moment in the book when she gets some applause after her revelation? am i misremembering? but in the show it was like nobody gave a fuck because ooh butterflies! which was...so stupid lol. bless you though, phillippa. penelope single-handedly contributed to the entertainment of the ton for years and exposed awful people even if she made fun of others. characters frequently and often complained if her issue was one day late and debated her true identity and so when she finally reveals herself there's no applause? no true reaction? were they all asleep? what the fuck? that scene was shocking at how badly executed it was. it was rushed and it showed.

-also, WHY choose to have Colin learn Penelope is Lady Whistledown in episode six? I hate this because it crams all the drama in the last two episodes and makes everything feel rushed and frantic. he should have found out in episode three or four and i'll die on that hill. for that matter, his refusal to understand that Whistledown was Penelope's life's work and greatest achievement/power was so annoying. In the book he came around to it pretty fast and yet here it dragged on for way too long. everyone wanted her to give Whistledown up until it benefited them.

-editing to add a huge gripe i have with post-production:

for the love of god, go easy on the filters. the artificial blues and yellows are killing me. in twilight, it was camp. it was great. it does not translate well here. also, have y'all noticed how HEAVILY they blur the backgrounds??? there was one scene with colin and penelope in the garden and every time the camera focuses on one of their faces from over the other's shoulder (they were both seated) the background is blurred heavily. it looks bad!!! stop doing that!!! the backgrounds lend to the vibe! it genuinely makes the show look like crap when i notice that happening. it makes them look like they're using the green screen filter on tik tok. STOP. IT.

(seriously, imagine Joe Wright's Pride and Prejudice, the scene where Elizabeth is on the rocky plains and or she and her aunt and uncle are sitting at the base of that enormous tree--all that gorgeous scenery, remember that? now slap the Bridgerton filter over it so it's all one massive ugly blur. does that mental image fill you with rage? GOOD.)

-i didn't cover this in the prev. post but in part 1, the whole runaway balloon scene was Not Good. Why a balloon? the danger that poses is not that great--why not a runaway horse? there was too much sense of danger to the actual threat posed by a freaking basket. also the way penelope acted in that scene felt very very out of character for her and i hate rewatching it, even if colin looks very dashing while holding the rope. ugh.

-polin's main sex scene was beautiful. i feel kind of disappointed that everything else we got was less than a minute long and not in a weird way. it just feels a fair amount of the promo we got from Nic and Luke was hinting at the sex scenes and yet we got very little in actuality. i keep seeing people talk about there being a minutes long montage of them and yet it got cut. but in season one we got a LOT (imo too many sex scenes between daphne and simon). there were too many side stories happening this season and i'm sure that contributed to that, but there is also a whisper in the back of my mind that tells me that maybe showrunners felt the need to overly pad this season with storylines because they either didn't feel like nicola and luke could carry it alone or because they didn't care.

-i'm really glad genevieve got more scenes here, especially with penelope. their friendship is really nice and it's sad/sweet that penelope chose to spend her last night before her wedding with her, because apparently her mother/sisters didn't plan anything for her.

-frencesca/john. i have no stake in this game since i haven't read their book yet, as i've mentioned before. they're cute together but i'm not invested. they should have gotten married way earlier imo because all the "we need to tip toe around the queen bc she hates us :( but we want to marry now" went on too long and got boring. the michaela thing doesn't bother me but i understand why fans are upset about it.

-polin felt like a side character in part 2. i feel like their scenes went by way too quickly and their screentime was so sparse to the point of legitimately becoming annoying. colin spent most of it mad and penelope spent most of it crying/trying to explain herself. they had hardly any truly happy moments together.

-kanthony was adorable.

-"i love you."

"...are you sure?"

dear reader, my heart split in two. they did a really really good job with showing penelope's self-doubt and low confidence thanks to years of neglect and ridicule and doubt from her mother. when colin stood up for her to her mother and she looked so shocked, my heart broke again for her. poor pen, i just wanted to hold her. when violet and hyacinth hugged penelope after colin announced their engagement i wanted to cry bc poor pen is so starving for positive affirmations/love that just those hugs where enough to overwhelm her.

-also lady danbury saying that she had suspected Pen was whistledown was amazing. i love that she acknowledged her and her love for the bridgertons....but i'm still really upset that they nixed her and penelope's friendship/mentorship that was in the books. she was busy with her own storyline what with violet and marcus and sure it still worked but that was a relationship i was so excited to see in the show...and they didn't even try adapting it except for like, three lines at the very end. >:( hello 911? we've been ROBBED.

(i keep editing this to add more but this is another gripe i have that will not let me rest:

ALSO ALSO ALSO:

i've noticed over seasons 1-2 that the main romantic couple has one dance set to the bridgerton theme song.

in season one, daphne and simon dance to the theme song in episode 2 or 3 (the one where daphne says "and we must try to look like we enjoy each other's company" and simon replies stiffly but then they giggle and laugh all through it which was so cute

in season two, kate and anthony dance to it in the second to last episode where they're dancing with the rest of the bridgertons and lady danbury at the ball they threw that nobody came to. the subtitles say it's a country rendition (whatever that means) of the theme song but they are involved in the dance so it counts.

when i noticed this i thought it was such a cute touch and was anxiously waiting for Penelope and Colin to get their moment.

...instead benedict dances to the bridgerton theme song with Lady Tilley? who he clearly isn't going to end up with? wtf?? and it doesn't even work in the context of the scene because it's a wholesome tune and yet she's dancing like she wants to eat him alive? sigh.

i'm just an old man yelling at clouds now but i wish the writing in this show was better so badly because it meets expectations but it's so frustrating because it can be so much better. let the show breathe! thin out the cast. really pick and choose who gets airtime, because it's precious and you anger your viewers when you waste it.

i will rewatch the season in full at some other point, but i'm too annoyed now. there is much more i want to talk about but this is long enough for now. i will say that at this point i'm not even sure i want to continue watching beyond this season.

(the playlist thing really got me thinking so to prove my point:)

FIVE SONGS THAT ARE A BETTER CHOICE FOR POLIN'S WEDDING DANCE THAN A FUCKING T.S SONG:

-a world alone-lorde (the lyrics are perfect even if they wouldn't be used in an orchestral version)

-little of your love-haim ( perfect choice for the scene imo bc it's very happy and upbeat for a cute wedding dance bit)

-all this and heaven too-florence and the machine

or fuck, if you wanted to make it into a really emotional rather than joyous moment go with dog days are over and it would be a banger with the proper editing bc that song is universal and punches up the emotions any times it's used.

-burning-maggie rogers

-save a kiss--jessie ware

ORRRRR to make it a lil steamy:

-adore you--jessie ware (this would also be perfect ngl)

and i'm not even biased to any of these, i literally just scrolled down my general playlist on spotify and picked them based on the vibes.

[justsome-di]

I support trans rights sometimes for selfish reasons

Bc I was sitting in the Planned Parenthood parking lot the other day, crying, and I was thinking about how cis women are just expected to live with pain. Like from period cramps to pap smears to endometrial biopsies. Blah blah "women are born with pain built in." It's just the hand we were dealt.

And if you don't do a natural birth with no epidural you're a bad mother. If your periods don't hurt all that much you just don't understand. If you avoid the gynecologist bc speculums hurt you, you're not taking care of your body and it's only you who is responsible. If you never get pregnant you just don't understand the joys of sacrifice, you'll never be complete in some way.

If you don't experience pain to the utmost degree and are able to shrug it off then you're not doing a good job of being a woman.

And I was thinking about how unfair it is how we're just expected to not just be in pain but make it into some badge of honor. Like totally ignore pain being a sign that something is wrong.

And then I was thinking of trans women who are amab. And obviously trans women suffer greatly in ways I will never experience. Trans women have insane battles to face.

But I was like man. Trans women who were amab won't have period cramps or pap smears or give birth. They miss out on this whole "womanly" type of pain. But they're still women. 10000% they're still women. I would never scoff at a trans woman bc of this (though I know some people do).

And I desperately need trans women to be seen as women as a whole so that we drop this whole "well women just need to go through this pain" bullshit.

Bc if we deconstruct what it means socially to be a woman--if we deconstruct the ties with women having to suffer, having to sacrifice, having to feel pain, then I will benefit. And selfishly I want to go to a gynecologist and tell them hey. I have this pain. It hurts when this thing happens.

And I selfishly want them to have an answer that isn't "well, this is just how the world is for you. Go ask your mother. Your sister. Your friends. Me. We all go through this, it's only fair you do, too. It's okay. It makes us stronger."

I selfishly want my reproductive system and pain to be removed from my criteria for being a woman. First and foremost because I want trans women to be loved and accepted. But also because I have an inkling that once it happens, gynecologists will start getting different sizes of speculums and stocking numbing agents.

[alohajun]

IM DOING GOOD!!

i graduated my pre university with cool grades i might say 😎🫡 i take a year of before continue my degree because a minor finnacial problem but all good all sort out since i start working on a broadcasting company!! my focus on writing fics/catching up w online friends getting fuzzy for a while bcs i need to focus in my irl situation first😵‍💫 and im rlly sorry if i dissappeared long enough😭😭

i miss catching up w you loki )):

yas! slayy my smart gworl jaecha 🥺🫶 ooh righto, hope everything is sorted out asap! and omg congratulations on the job, that's amazing! 🥳 also i totally get you, focus on your irl situation as much as you need, we will be here! 🥰💗 i missed catching up with you too, love!!

i finished my law degree with second-class honors as well and my graduation is on february (bc a couple of kids are doing their exams in oct/nov) and so far, i'm just at home, chillaxing. i applied for a job as a tender writer and am currently waiting for a response, so there's that too.

and health-wise, i recently got injured (cut?) over my ankle and it was a pretty deep and long cut, so i am just resting these days and trying to speed up the healing process! walking is difficult and painful but i am just sucking it in bc the doctor stated that it could be months before i can walk properly without feeling any pain so might as well just get used to the pain now itself 😤😭

[calzonekestis]

I feel like we should also add to that post that like… Grace did more in ten minutes to show her character work and her understanding of her role than some actors do in episodes or seasons?

She seems so sweet. It’s so unfair.

You're right tbh and you should say it. I'll sing the praises of @quirly all day and twice on Sunday.

It really was a one episode part with just a handful of scenes, but you could tell Grace really gave it her all regardless of that fact. There's a reason why people love Chrissy and make art and edits of her in spite of her short screen time - and that's all down to Grace's performance and doing everything she could to make the character endearing and having us empathize/sympathize with her struggles. It wasn't just a "guest star of the week", she left an impact on the audience and on the character of Eddie... that we all felt the loss and missed her when she was gone.

In some respects it's a thankless task, but so much rested on her shoulders. If she hadn't put the care and consideration that she did into her performance, it all could have fallen apart. "Ok, this character has secret trauma... and now she's dead. Sad, sure, but I don't feel anything bc we didn't really get a chance to know her."

It all could have fallen flat and felt hollow, but it didn't... and that's all Grace, and her bringing to life what was on the page and then elevating it. You feel the loss of Chrissy, you empathize with how Eddie - and even Jason to a degree - feel. The "Chrissy, this is for you" moment is such a payoff because of it. Like Joe said, yes, Eddie had a crush on her... but that moment wasn't about her in relation to anyone else or how they felt about her. It was a tribute to her her own individual character.

A character Grace was able to bring to life and make us all love in such a short amount of time. If she hasn't done that, that moment wouldn't have been as powerful or satisfying as it was. For me, personally.

It wasn't about Eddie. Yes, he had a cool badass moment jamming out on the guitar - but. That wasn't about Eddie. Like yes it served a tactical purpose to lure the demobats away, I realize that - but it wasn't about Eddie having a cool moment. It wasn't about that to me, and it wasn't about that to his character.

Honoring her life, and avenging her death. That was for Chrissy.

[soulnottainted]

AIGHT

the time is come for me to talk about my fourth ritual and MEETING MY FICTIONAL HUSBAND FACE TO FACE

My friend picked me up and we drove to the venue, we got into our outfits (I wore a cape that is VERY similar to Copia's cape that my friend made me) and we ended up making friends in the VIP line.

Then we got our VIP merch which I'll share later

We went into the Veneration of Relics, which is the same room that we'd be meeting my husband later. Some VERY intimidating music was playing as we got to take pictures with the bodies (FAKE) of my parental f/o Nihil and my brothers Primo, Secondo, and Terzo. It was VERY eerie.

After that I got to get some merch at the merch table. I got some pins and also a poster!

So we waited until 7:15 when the meeting Papa begins. In the meantime, we made some friends in line, got some free dip n dots from the nice ladies working the stand, and chilled out.

We didn't get to see the two openers but honestly hearing it I wasn't missing much

And then....meeting HIM? MY FICTIONAL HUSBAND? MY PAPA IV? MY HUSBAND?

my friend gave me a pep talk before I went in by myself, because damn it I had so much anxiety pent up. The damn intimidating music from earlier was still playing and IT DOESN'T HELP THAT THE BODIES OF THE EMERITUS FAMILY ARE STILL ON DISPLAY. I put my stuff on a table before I was let into a curtained off area....

And there he was. Holy shit he WAS PRETTY. also jeez I forgot that he is actually not much taller than me. But oh my goodness. I knew there was a barrier with plexiglass, but HE CAME FROM BEHIND IT AND STOOD ACROSS FROM ME, JUST A COUPLE FEET, TO TALK TO ME. he was gorgeous oh my lord-

He said hello and asked how I was, as well as saying he liked my cape!

Ofc I asked him how he was doing too, and he said he was doing very well! He said my cape was "very velvety" and omg I had to keep myself from bursting out laughing. I showed him the inside and he was like "yeah yeah yeah!" I told him I was here to celebrate graduating college and he said "congratulations! That is an enormous feat!"

I told him it was a coincidence because it room me four years, this was my fourth ritual, and he was Papa IV, and he responded "I think the fourth ritual tops all of that"

Then the picture was taken. Forgot to ask for a pose and take off my mask bc I was so transfixed on Copia tbh.

Then he congratulated me again and wished me well in life, and he was like "you're doing more than me, I have no degree"

And I said "no but you've done enough, like you deserve this

"Naww, thank you"

And he said to take care of myself, I said you too,

And I said bye Papa

And that was it.

When I got out of there, I wanted to cry. Like....I met him. The love of my life. Selfshipping with that man for four years, it was the sweetest thing. And I'll never forget it.

Then my friends and I, after we all met him, we went into the pit and waited for Ghost to start!

Amazing as always! I didn't see much because we got there late and ofc tall people. But that was ok. From my line of sight I could see Aether and then diagonally through some heads I could see Copia down on the catwalk. My phone sucks so once again my pictures I didn't take many. But they put on a great show as always!

Oh also after the show we waited for hours where the buses were. Swiss and Fire came over to say hi because they felt bad we were standing in the misting rain. It was so cool to talk to them for a couple minutes and say thank you and all that.

We left the venue around 2 in the morning, I got a PB and j sandwich at a gas station so I could eat, and then my friend brought me where I was staying, which put me getting to bed at almost 4 in the morning.

This is a night I'll never forget, for sure. My husband, my love, I love you. And it was a privilege and an honor to see you.

[onawhimsicot]

I'm getting to the end of League of Dragons (seems like it's building up to the final confrontation with Napoleon!) and I'm sorta in denial about being done with the whole series, so I just keep putting off finishing it D:

long list of spoiler reactions below:

- I really loved the dueling stuff in the beginning, needlessly dramatic, love Laurence getting into ridiculous situations bc of his honor that make Temeraire lose his shit haha. Also Hammond unexpectedly being kinda a badass??

- I think it's really interesting seeing the universal culture/instincts dragons share! It was clear that all dragons cared about eggs to some degree, but I think it's really interesting that even though they don't rear their own young, egg-stealing/endangerment is reviled. But also, that protectiveness/parental instincts only extend to the egg; literally the second they hatch, the dragons are like welp, you can do whatever you want, our job is done. The change is immediate and the dragonet completely disappears from their list of priorities. Even though I knew Iskierka and Temeraire weren't going to be doting parents or anything, it was still really cool to see the drastic way their attitude changed. Like yeah!! they don't rear their young! they're done!

-I'm fascinated by Ning's combination of divine wind and fire! I'm bad at understanding and visualizing action scenes so I don't think I fully get what happened quite yet--- Was she making that shrieking noise as a version of the divine wind that's separate from the fire or was she building up heat like a tea kettle so that she could have that high heat blast of fire? I'm thinking it's more of the former, but I hope we get to see more of her skills bc it's incredibly neat. But who knows what the little schemer is up to lol It sounds as if she might just be companionless in the end? Maybe she'll "technically" be someone's companion but still do her own thing with politics. I really do love the dragonrider bond though so I would love to see how she would change if she bonded with someone

- PERSCITIA MY BELOVED, i care her so much, and I love that she and Temeraire are legit friends

- Temeraire trying so hard to keep a secret from Laurence because he realizes for the first time in a long time, Laurence is smiling and laughing 🥺 and then the cut to Laurence's POV that immediately reveals Laurence is hiding something from Temeraire too LMAO incredibly funny. Also love that we're seeing the ways Temeraire has matured-- he's still the same silly dragon but him trying to maintain Laurence's happiness was so sweet.

- I think my favorite scene so far has to be the little awards ceremony. Once again, seeing those cultural(?) things with the dragons haha. I love that all the captains are like okay...this is boring... and the dragons are like oh my GOD!!! BE RESPECTFUL!!!!! like the tables are flipped for once and the dragons are just embarrassed that they have to keep the captains under control. Fidelitas being upset that he's not getting an award but immediately putting that aside because this is a SOCIAL event, he has to be RESPECTFUL about the proceedings-- oh no, his captain is so embarassing!!!!! LMAO such a fun scene. I love the way we see dragons have their own society going on in the backgrounds and its more complex than just "me and my captain"

-Just know I am at all times going feral over any crumbs of Tharkay content, I like him so much

- and Emily Roland too, i'm always so happy whenever she's around. She was gone for a couple of chapters and i mISSED HER SO MUCH, i love the way she GETS Laurence at this point and is just like oh my god ughhh of COURSE he went dueling. I am so fond of her and I love that we got to keep seeing her grow throughout the entire series.

-oh and them finally seeing Temeraire's namesake? I felt that in my heart 🥺

[pedroalonso]

i finished watching lcdp 5 and 

i fucking LOVED IT, thank you.

The stuff from part 3/4 were really good in terms of the flashbacks between berlermo and the brothers and their trio as a whole, but the bank stuff back then was kind of draggy which sucked because the bank should have had the intense scenes.

But then along came part 5 volume 1 and HELLLL YES!!! The action was intense and thrilling. The stakes were high. The emotional moments were perfectly squeezed in between the scenes and they were all so potent. The ending was beautifully foreshadowed and Tokyo went out with fucking style. An absolute icon. (RIP BABYGIRL I CANT BELIEVE THEY TOOK YOU AWAY FROM ME WHEN WE WERE JUST STARTING TO GET ALONG. What injustice.)

Also, I CAN’T BELIEVE THE GANG FINALLY UNDERSTANDS THE MEANING OF TEAM WORK??? AHHH MY HEART. MY BABIES. MY RAGTAG BUNCH OF MISFITS.

Part 5 really made me appreciate the whole gang. I realize that I have my favorites of course, but I LOVE THEM ALL, okay. ALL OF THEM.

I will say though, that as much as I love Pedro, the Berlin flashback scenes were really odd and felt out of place. Sure it was FUN, but I couldn’t connect it to anything that was going on in the main heist, nor did it add any emotional depth to what was happening there (unlike Tokyo’s flashbacks where we learned more about her character and empathized with her RIGHT BEFORE THEY KILLED HER OFF lmao)

But I said this before, I honestly don’t care about Berlin’s son, and I was hoping the flashbacks were going to make me change my mind by seeing how it affects the whole story. But it DIDN’T, not at all. It felt like Andrés had his own thing going on that had NOTHING to do with the bank, which sucked seeing as how his flashbacks in parts 3/4 showed that this was the heist he loved the most. This was his obra maestra. This was the heist Sergio (and to a certain degree Martín), decided to do in order to honor his memory. And seeing him running around Copenhagen with his newly introduced son and sidecharacters he barely interacted with before, supposedly POST MONASTERY, without his brother or Martín? Well. Put that on the list of TOP 10 ANIME BETRAYALS.

I am hoping though that SOMEHOW they’ll tie his plot together with everything else and there will be payoff. But for now, I’m afraid to say that IN A SURPRISING TURN OF EVENTS, I liked the Berlin flashbacks the least. I still enjoyed them because of Pedro, but it was definitely the weakest link in the series. Sorry mi amooor.

ANYWAY, here are some of my favorite bits:

ANY SCENE WITH PALERMO. God damn, Rodrigo de la Serna steals every scene he’s in. He doesn’t just hit the mark, he OBLITERATES IT. His expressions, his eyes, the changes in his voice. Every tiny bit of micro acting he’s doing absolutely adds to the moment and he just fucking NAILS IT. My god.  It made me miss the energy he and Pedro had, bouncing and playing off each other in the previous season. Hoping to get a little bit of that soon before the show ends. UGHH i miss my boys

the gandia fist fight with Bogota was exactly the kind of chaos I’m into yes PLEASE

Palermo/Lisboa In-Laws Slash Co-Leaders Power Duo MORE OF THAT TOO PLEASE

i really liked Monica’s arc this season and I love her for shooting Arturo to near death. RIP to her but i won’t feel guilty lmaoooo. Esther Acebo really brought it this season DAMN

I liked the Tokyo flashbacks bc Miguel and Ursula are both hot RIP hot people

All of the Andrés scenes were thankfully in character and despite hating the plot, I loved seeing him be a petty, evil, chaotic bastard

Andrés insisting Tokyo be in the heist was hilarious because we ALL KNOW how THAT turned out

Manila’s backstory was touching!!! I didn’t like her trying to mess with Monver though

ALICIA’S LABOR LMAO I JUST -- It was also hilarious as hell ok.

Also Marsella is too sexy for his own good THERE I SAID IT

That bit when Tamayo mocked Angel by making weird noises. I was like “Mans has officially gone off the rails”

The hostage escape was stressful but It WAS FUN. TEAMWORK

Sergio saying Raquel is the sexiest woman in the world but he loves her for her brains. LMAO.

That scene where Sergio apologizes to the gang for being caught and his voice started cracking when he said “Lo Siento Palermo” MAYHAPS I SCREAMED.

Tokyo’s death scene. Definitely just as jarring as Nairobi’s but as awesome as Berlin’s. It was a shock but it felt well done to me.

I NEED VOLUME 2 NOWWWWWWWWWWWW

[actualbird]

hello hi!!! first of all i must say i'm eternally grateful for stumbling upon your fics on ao3 in my early days of playing ToT (less than a month i guess, too lazy to check rn haha), this was such a blessing, i mean, your writing is outstanding, to me you're a type of writer every fandom needs - keen in observing the characters and putting them to life, giving them additional depth with such skill. whew. anyway you're a blessing.

secondly i was scrolling through your blog here reading all i could abt marius because yeah, he's my #1 boy. lately i've been struggling with my perception of myself gender-related, not gonna go into detail bc it's not that important, anyways a lot of self-doubt and answers i can't find. but then. your posts about marius, the mc and your thoughts on their gender and behaviour, ways of expressing themselves, etc etc. and it had helped me enormously, you know. i tried many pronouns, names, ways of expressing myself, nothing clicked as right until i've read your posts about how both of them wouldn't care too much and just go as they are, i mean, i don't exactly remember the actual quote but you wrote how marius asked the mc if she's okay with him calling her she and miss and if she'd prefer any other pronouns, and she said nah i'm ok with miss still. and then i was like oh god wow, this exactly. i mean i don't HAVE to pick any specific pronouns or change my clothing style or start or stop putting more or less makeup on (im feminine afab and to put it shortly i'm ok with any look, gnc or not lol) it's just like that! that simple. so i'm forever grateful for this revelation, for the fact that i started playing this game and eventually found you. ty 💜 (also i'm sorry for my words choosing and whatever, english is my second language and i don't care much about grammar or sounding properly lol, and maybe if my message was too personal and i've dumped a lot of unneeded things on you. i'm sorry in advance for that also, you can ignore this mess of a message haha)

hello, anon!!

first off, no need to ever apologize for english trouble bc mood.

second off, thank you so much for your kind words on my writing :(((

and third off, i'd like to preface this response by giving a meme thats basically how i looked like as i read this ask

no frigging joke. tears in my eyes. ive been having a bad day today and a bad night yesterday, in regards to my writing so reading this just....it means a lot to me.

im so so honored that my works helped you figure out this part of yourself. truly and absolutely, your gender and expression of it doesnt need a strict label or rules if you dont want that. it's anything you want it to be, whatever makes you feel most like yourself. since i wrote those hcs, ive got the right to tell u marius and mc are so so happy for you. and i am too.

im just.....very very positively baffled to receive this ask at all. emphasis on positive. like i said earlier, ive been having a bad time irt how i feel about my writing kdsjbfsjg. most of it boiled down to the fact that not only is everything i make just like, not good writing, but also that it's useless and amounts to nothing.

and then i get this ask.

and it's not the first one of its kind ive received.

off the top of my head, ive received a dm from somebody telling me that my fanfiction years ago had inspired them to pursue writing in college and they were just accepted for a masters degree in creative writing. ive gotten a comment on a fanfic that said the story gave them the courage to confess to their crush and them and that other person have been together ever since. ive gotten asks like this telling me that my works helped them feel seen irt to gender, mental illness, or just like...being a person.

theres no way i can prove all these things happened in real life. ive got the messages and comments archived in chat histories or on this blog or on my ao3 comments, but these are words online, and stories can always be made up.

but if they are true then...huh.

it makes me feel honored.

im probably never going to get to the point where i'll see myself as a good person or where i stop doubting what i create, but if what i make can result in things like this, then man, what i think doesnt fucking matter. im not good but what i make can maybe, just maybe, result in good.

all this i ramblingly type to say thank you. from the bottom of my heart, thank you for telling me this.

i hope you have a wonderful day and a kind new year ahead of you, anon :')

[kayliemusing]

42: top 3s

1: Top 3 ice cream flavors - classic vanilla, birthday cake/birthday batter, bubblegum

2: Top 3 Disney Movies - Mulan, Onward, Soul (but this changes frequently lol)

3: Top 3 vacation destinations - I've never been outside of my home country so I'll say my top 3 DREAM destinations: NYC, Hawaii, a random countryside in either France or the UK

4: Top 3 places to shop - Dynamite, Sephora, Winners/Homesense

5: Top 3 subjects of study/classes to take - English/anything creative writing related, Interior Decorating/Design, Communications?

6: Top 3 make up products - YSL Touche Eclat Foundation, literally any Mac Lipstick but it has to be matte, & Fenty Beauty contour stick

7: Top 3 music artists - Taylor Swift - Of Monsters and Men - The Lumineers

8: Top 3 spices/herbs - Cinnamon - Nutmeg (literally tastes like autumn) - Paprika

9: Top 3 drinks - Diet Coke - Hot Chocolate - Vanilla Bean Frappe

10: Top 3 apps to use - Instagram - Pinterest -iBooks

11: Top 3 months of the year - May, October, December

12: Top 3 clothing items - My black/white turtle neck, high waisted jeans, plaid blazer

13: Top 3 binge perfect tv shows - Bones, Supernatural, Brooklyn Nine Nine

14: Top 3 romantic dates - (I've never been on a date but if I had, it would be this) Evening walk, late night drive, late night coffee date (tbh anything at night feels romantic)

15: Top 3 kinds of flower - Water lilies, cherry blossoms, roses

16: Top 3 christmas movies - A Christmas Carol (2009), Home Alone, The Polar Express

17: Top 3 OTPs - Nesta and Cassian from ACOTAR series by SJM, Manon and Dorian from Throne of Glass series by SJM, Casteel and Poppy from From Blood and Ash series by JLM.

18: Top 3 quotes to describe your life - "I write not to find, but to leave" by Scherezade Siobhan - "I want to be myself again. I want to be six. I want to stop knowing everything I know" by Catherynne M. Valente - "The truth is, I pretend to be a cynic, but I am really a dreamer who is terrified of wanting something she may never get" by Joanna Hoffman.

19: Top 3 characteristics you love about yourself - my kindness bc it's not surface level kindness, but actually something deeply rooted within me - my resilience even tho sometimes it doesn't feel like resilience - my loyalty bc it is a hard as steel kind of loyalty

20: Top 3 kinds of candy - Maltesers, Kit kats, smarties

21: Top 3 ways to exercise/ be active - Walking, dancing, mowing the lawn/shoveling the sidewalk

22: Top 3 spirit animals - wolf, hummingbird, tiger (i googled it bc i didn't know and i was scared it was a joke but)

23: Top 3 petnames - I like 'lovebug', 'love', 'sweetheart'

24: Top 3 books read outside of school - The Hating Game by Sally Thorne, A Court of Silver Flames by Sarah J Maas but viewers discretion is advised, Crush by Richard Siken

25: Top 3 most used websites - Youtube, Tumblr, Pinterest

26: Top 3 people you last texted - my mom, my bestie megan, and my sister bc they're the only people i text...

27: Top 3 hashtags you use - the only time i use hashtags is if i'm trying to promote some of my writing so I'll usually use writingcommunity, writersonig, poetryonig lol

28: Top 3 instagram accounts you follow - Trista Mateer, Griefmother, obviously taylor swift

29: Top 3 guilty pleasures - buzzfeed quizzes, early 2000s music, romance novels

30: Top 3 summer activities - Going to the zoo, long evening walks, campfires and s'mores

31: Top 3 things to draw/doodle - hearts, flowers, random swirls bc it's the only thing i can doodle...

32: Top 3 aesthetics - cityscape aesthetic, autumn aesthetic, rustic aesthetic

33: Top 3 things you'd buy if you gained three million dollars - a new car, a condo, another cat

34: Top 3 ways to treat yourself - facial, a large bag of maltesers, buying the makeup i really want but have been putting off

35: Top 3 celebrity crushes - Evan Peters, Matthew Daddario, henry cavill

36: Top 3 books from your childhood - Love You Forever by Robert Munsch, The Big Friendly Giant by Roald Dahl, and Madeline by Ludwig Bemelmens

37: Top 3 accents to hear - Australian, super poshy british accent, new zealand accent

38: Top 3 scents - Fresh rain, vanilla, sweet cinnamon pumpkin from bath and body works

39: Top 3 "Friends" quotes - "WE WERE ON A BREAK" -Ross, "Guess things were just going too well for me" -also ross, and "it's so exhausting waiting for death" - phoebe

40: Top 3 cupcake flavors - tbh I haven't tried that many cupcakes so your typical vanilla, chocolate, and Pink Lady Cupcake from Babycakes Cupcakery

41: Top 3 fruits - Pomegranates, Strawberries, Raspberries

42: Top 3 places you've had amazing pizza from - Pizzahut, Dominos, Pizza73

43: Top 3 sports teams to watch - i don't

44: Top 3 crayola colors - uh, i guess red, purple, and pink??

45: Top 3 things you hope to accomplish in college - Certificates/Degrees in Copyediting and Creative Writing, and I think simply just deeper critical thinking skills when it comes to writing and books

46: Top 3 fanfictions you've read - I read more books than fanfics, I've read a couple on tumblr but don't remember the names sorry :/

47: Top 3 people you miss right now - my dad, my best friend bc she's in vancouver, taylor swift bc she's not on tumblr anymore rip

48: Top 3 fears - Failure, Loss, not achieving anything in life/not reaching my full potential

49: Top 3 favorite literary devices - Foreshadowing is always god tier, cliffhangers although evil i love those too, symbolism

50: Top 3 pet peeves - People dragging their shoes on the floor when they walk, when you tell someone your fav hobby/music artist/interest and they immediately go 'oh I hate X!', and people who go 'you're so quiet!!!' but in a way that draws in more attention and/or makes me feel more uncomfortable like i would literally rather die

51: Top 3 physical things you find attractive - Hands, nice hair, defined jawlines

52: Top 3 bad habits - Nailbiting, picking at my blemishes oops, lip biting

53: Top 3 pets you've had/wish to have - Cats bc they complete me, I've always wanted a Samoyed, and I've always wanted a turtle

54: Top 3 types of foreign food - Chicken Chow Mein, deep fried shrimp, japanese chicken wings

55: Top 3 things you want to say to someone in your lifetime - 'I quit', 'I love you', 'you changed my life'

56: Top 3 dog breeds - Samoyed, german shepherds, collies

57: Top 3 cheesy romance movies - You've Got Mail, How To Lose a Guy In 10 Days, 10 Things I Hate About You

58: Top 3 languages you speak/wish to speak - French, Sign, and maybe Japanese?

59: Top 3 series (book, movie, television) - The Cruel Prince series by Holly Black, A Court of Thorns and Roses by Sarah J Maas (but literally only for Cassian and Nesta), From Blood and Ash by Jennifer L Armentrout

60: Top 3 pizza toppings - Mushrooms, alfredo sauce, pineapple

61: Top 3 youtubers you're subscribed to - Game Grumps, Charlotte Dobre, Megan Batoon

62: Top 3 tattoo / piercing ideas - I want to get a tattoo on my wrist of the last thing my dad ever wrote me, a hummingbird tattoo right next to it, and then a cross on my index finger

63: Top 3 awards you want to win - National Book Awards, Nobel Prize, and maybe even Goodreads Choice Awards lol

64: Top 3 emojis - Laugh/Crying emoji, the please sir emoji that kinda gives off those puss n boots eyes, and the stars emoji

65: Top 3 cars you dream of owning - 1970s Chev Impala, tbh a cute little Hyundai Venue, and maaaaybe the 1964 ferarri 250 gt luso (idk if that name was totally right but i had to do tons of googling to find it. i don't know a lot about cars and i don't really have a top 3 lol)

66: Top 3 authors - Right now I'm really into Sarah J Maas, Sally Thorne, and Holly Black maybe?

67: Top 3 historical figures - Jesus, Anne Frank, Vincent Van Gogh

68: Top 3 baby names - Ryder, Leila, Gracie

69: Top 3 DIYs - Candles, refurnishing old furniture (i.e. my mom and i painted our wooden garbage can), and really just any type of autumn diy

70: Top 3 smoothie combos/flavors - Strawberry/Banana, Mango, Strawberry-Mango

71: Top 3 songs of this month - Happier Than Ever by Billie Eilish, Biblical by Calum Scott, and Visiting Hours by Ed Sheeran

72: Top 3 questions of this post you want to be asked - I did them all bc I made it a survey instead of an ask meme ;)

73: Top 3 villains - Regina/The Evil Queen from Once Upon a Time, Cruella De Vil, and Moriarty from Sherlock

74: Top 3 Cities you want to see - Montreal, NYC, Vancouver (honorable mention: LA)

75: Top 3 recipes you want to try - different kind of salad and/or burger bowls, Stuffed bell peppers, and homemade lemon loaf

76: Top 3 dream jobs - Bestselling author, the person who runs a companies social media accounts, youtuber/blogger

77: Top 3 lucky items - tbh don't have one

78: Top 3 traditions you have - Christmas Eve Service and if I don't go to that at least incorporating reading the christmas story on christmas day or eve, idk if this counts as tradition but going to the corn maze every fall, and whenever it's easter/christmas/thanksgiving we always have a big meal w/ family

79: Top 3 things you miss about being a kid - reckless abandon, dreaming about growing up with hopefulness and no dashed hopes, experiencing holidays like halloween and christmas as a kid

80: Top 3 harry potter characters - I've never read or watched Harry Potter rip (ok well i saw the first and second (and maybe third?) movie in the sixth grade I think) but I think I really liked Hermoine, Harry obviously and Dobby

81: Top 3 lies you were told - i don't have 3, but this one has a story but basically when my sister and i were in elementary school my sister got hit by a car and so the insurance thing was that she would recieve 10k when she was 18 and as a child i thought that was unfair so my dad told me that my sister had to split it with me when we were 18 lmao obviously that didn't happen (i think i realized that wasn't true in middle school)

82: Top 3 pictures in your camera roll right now - Pictures of my cat, one of my sister in a hilarious filter, and a picture of my rocking my TS merch

83: Top 3 turn ons - Kindness, defined jawline, easy going

84: Top 3 turn offs - arrogance, unkempt, super loud and obnoxious

85: Top 3 magazines/news papers/ journals to read - I don't read much of those so I'll tell you some sites I love for writing purpose's: there's Wellstoried, justwriterlythings, springhole.net (which is filled with generators if you're stuck and also tons of infomation and advice)

86: Top 3 things you wish you had known earlier - that toad in Mario Party was wearing a mushroom hat and that it is actually not his head, that immaculate means 'clean' before i misused that word like several times over the years, and that the one turn i always take on my way to work where i thought everyone didn't know how to drive was actually bc i didn't have the right of way rip me

87: Top 3 spongebob episodes - the one episode where spongebob and patrick find a ghost ship, that one episode where they form a bikini bottom band and perform it at a football game in a little fish tank, and the one episode where squidward has his first snowball fight

88: Top 3 places to be in the world - I'd love to be in NYC, Montreal, or Hawaii

89: Top 3 things you'd do differently - I would not have applied for RDC, similarly I should have just paid the 500 dollars to the one certificate program I wanted to do instead of overthinking it, and I wish I wouldn't have ended a friendship the way I did

90: Top 3 TV shows from your childhood - Spongebob Squarepants, That's So Raven, and Hannah Montana

91: Top 3 meals you love - Turkey Burgers, Chilli, and Instant Pot Chicken Tortilla Soup

92: Top 3 kinds of tea - i don't drink tea

93: Top 3 embarrassing moments - one time in sixth grade I tripped and fell right on my face in front of my crush, this other time like a couple years ago i opened the door to my car and only realized much too late while i was staring at this random family that it was not my car, and when i went to the gas station to get gas and couldn't get my gas lid on my car opened and this guy had to help me which was already embarrassing enough but then the gas pump wouldn't work so i had to go inside to pay just to realize i forgot my wallet and had to shamefully walk back to my car and then run back inside the convenience store and then pay and then walk back to my car and finally fill my tank.

94: Top 3 holidays to celebrate - Christmas, Halloween, Thanksgiving

95: Top 3 things to do in the rain - have an existential crisis, pretend you're in a music video, walk through puddles like you're six again

96: Top 3 things to do in the snow - Sledding, Build a snowman, shovel it even tho you don't want to

97: Top 3 items you can't leave the house w/o - phone, keys, wallet

98: Top 3 movies you'd like to see - Jurassic World 3, Hotel Transylvania: Transformania bc i'm a child, and the animation of the addams family

99: Top 3 art mediums - Writing fiction/poetry, painting, music

100: Top 3 museums you've been to - Royal Tyrell Museum, Canadian History one in edmonton lol, and heritage park in calgary

101: Top 3 school memories - Middle school dances when the popular kids would grind to the song "Low" which was always an interesting experience, in the twelfth grade at winter formal when we all shouted "SHUT UP AND DANCE!" at the same time when they played Shut Up and Dance, and the day i left

102: Top 3 things you don't/Won't miss - School, my sisters ex, 2016 bc she was a rough year yikes

103: Top 3 pick up lines - "My name is Will. God's Will.", "I'd like to take you to the movies but they don't like you bring your own snacks", "are you from tennessee bc you're the only 10 i see"

104: Top 3 sports to watch - none of them

105: Top 3 taylor swift songs - all too well - exile - coney island

[potatoes-tomatoes]

Is there a difference between the Garu of jetix series and love’s recipe?

Oh absolutely Nony!! TLDR: Jetix!Garu and LR!Garu and fundamentally different. The portrayal of pucca and garu’s relationship is one of the key factors in Garu’s characterization. 

Jetix emphasizes the physical humor of the chase, and as a result, heightens the bad qualities of the two. Pucca is more obsessive, which drives  Garu to become cold towards her and the villagers. He values his honor to a selfish degree and his fixation on being the best ninja makes him estranged to the village. He’s sassy, prideful, moody (like watch the episode y’all, he’s just a bomb waiting to go off holy-), and surprisingly, outspoken. He’s a lot more expressive, which I do miss when I watch LR. 

LR is more endearing, there’s a childish innocence to the chase. Pucca is more considerate of Garu’s boundaries and Garu is more receptive to Pucca’s affections. Garu in this version is polite, reserved, poised, gentlemanly, boyish, and regards his honor with dignity instead of pride. 

so for the long version: Jetix!Garu is so selfish. Like... he’s fixated on his honor and duty as a ninja that he comes across as cold, rude and uncaring towards the villagers, especially pucca. Jetix!Garu is completely uninterested in pucca and truly just wants to be left alone. Even if it comes at the expense of others, like in Feud Fight, Garu values being kept to himself. It kinda makes me wonder how he became friends with ching and abyo in the first place. 

  Garu never seems to do good for the sake of doing good, or because he cares for the village. He’s always motivated to go on a laborious quest because it will give him great “honor”, and it doesn’t help that this great honor is so vague and elusive in the show. uhhh winning the valley ping pong competition will bring honor! Dragging a wet noodle around the world will bring honor! Buying a moon night light inside a volcano can only be done by a great warrior because.... the story needs a serious try-hard character for Pucca to outshine and bounce off of. That’s the real oof in Garu’s character. His genuine efforts at greatness are constantly undermined by outside forces ( he takes Tobe way too seriously... like. Garu. He’s hopelessly incompetent, chill.)  and especially Pucca. It makes his motivation seem desperate to the audience and harder to sympathize with. Speaking of pucca....

   Jetix!Garu really doesn’t like Pucca. Not as a friend, and especially not as a crush. When she pursues him, his face is either red in embarrassment,  blue-tinted in anxiousness, or he violently struggles against her hugs, yet the supporting characters treat this cat and mouse chase as endearing. It shocks me when I rewatch my favorite episodes; I end up feeling so sorry for Garu and a bit creeped out how normalized pucca’s obsession is. I get frustrated that Pucca is never aware of Garu’s discomfort, and everyone enables her by assuring that Garu is just shy! He’ll come around one day. Maybe. I mean, there are a few bones the writers throw us here and there, but Garu’s reciprocation is just too inconsistent to validate. 

I think the worst their depiction has ever gotten is the intro to Season 1x19 “Oh the Bells!” Garu visibly shakes, his eyes shrink, he sweats in disgust after Pucca kisses him and leaves. Abyo literally says right after, “How can you let her do that to you?”Like bruh. This is not the relationship 8 yr old me should have been rooting for. 

Anyways, Garu’s more extreme reactions to Pucca’s antics are a direct consequence of their cat and mouse chase being depicted as humorous instead of endearing, as the original flash shorts intended. buuuuut Love’s Recipe thankfully decided to go back to the flash’s roots and bring out the best in the chase. 

I commented on LR’s dynamic when things get pushed too far, and I’m so happy that Pucca is now just a young girl filled with infatuation and innocent young love that she just wants to express it all in the open, and poor Garu is so overwhelmed but never too exasperated. He willingly hangs out with Pucca, he values his time with her and knows he doesn’t need to protect her because she can take care of herself. The strongest Garu ever reacts at pucca’s antics are small sighs or nervous sweat and blush. 

Garu is incredibly polite and poised towards everyone. I thought it smart that Garu’s residency in the outskirts of Sooga forest made him knowledgable about the fauna, and as a result gave him a reason to stay close to the village; He’s the produce runner for the Village’s most esteemed restaurant. It’s a humble yet important job. Garu wants to be a warrior because he truly wants to be good (maybe also because he wants to live up to his lost heritage?? the season finale kinda touched on that?? LR writers give us the forbidden Garu family lore) and his importance in the village validates his need for honor. He just wants to uphold the image everyone has of him and deliver justice. 

 Fittingly, Garu finds Tobe out of place and obnoxious bc he doesn’t fit in w/ his priorities. Tobe doesn’t threaten Garu’s way of life, he’s just some random laky Don-King restaurant's manager hired. Garu never wants to deal with him and never takes him seriously, he realizes how weak of a rival Tobe is. I’m gonna miss the super serious and over the top clash Jetix! Garu and Tobe had, ngl. It made for great banter on Jetix’s end. Garu can still be pretty sassy towards him, and others. I appreciate the writers left that in. 

If I didn’t make sense y’all are free to drag me bc my dudes it is 3 am my time I am only functioning on 1 braincell rn. goodnight 

[razanartuk]

about me tag game thing

i was tagged by the wonderful @nothingunrealistic! thank you very much ily <3

under read more bc i was not capable of keeping my answers brief this time around

why did you choose your url?

this...was supposed to be a short explanation but it turned into quite a tale so strap in i guess because we are going on a ride. back in 2017 i was just getting into musical theatre rp and i was still feeling too shy to really talk to anyone ooc so i would just wait for people i wanted to interact with to post starter calls so i could just do things in character with them the easy way. So i did this with my friend cam, who posted a starter for me using a lyric from If I Could Tell Her. she linked the song so i could listen to it, so i did and i went ‘wait a minute, is that Ben Platt from Pitch Perfect?? (and other things too, but i only recognized his voice at the time bc of the acappella girl movies)’ and yes it certainly was.

i had zero idea what the plot of Dear Evan Hansen was about at that point, and for some reason based off Just That One Song and the poster art of who i assumed was Some Guy in a Polo Shirt i started to think it was about some jock guy who broke his arm and had an emo/goth friend who had either died or gone missing under mysterious circumstances. also i intuited that Evan had a crush on his friend’s sister but he couldn’t tell her that directly or his emo friend would kick his ass. so i was like mostly wrong, but a little bit right.

oh and i knew jared and alana were characters from the show bc cam said that they were i think?? but i had no idea what their role was. so after listening to if i could tell her, i listened to good for you and all i really got out of that was that evan the apparently not-jock guy had done...something... that really hurt jared and alana. and at that point i finally decided to go look up a plot synopsis and i found out i was waaay off base. but honestly this is why cast recordings should include scene dialogue in the songs bc otherwise you just get soundtracks like dear evan hansen where the songs have like. zero context. we really just go from waving through a window to for forever to sincerely me without like. any reason as to what is happening huh. It’s honestly not a surprise anymore that all those people on twitter had no idea the plot isn’t about gay teenagers.

anyways. cam was writing jared and she made a post at one point about wishing somebody would write alana and i was like ‘oh i could do that!’ (after i had actually Seen a bootleg and finally knew what the whole story was, of course) so i made a multimuse rp blog featuring alana beck, nabulungi hatimbi, chloe valentine and some other characters, and cam started sharing her headcanons with me that alana is trans, jared and alana were close friends when they were little kids but they sort of drifted apart as they got older and their priorities in life changed, jared was the first person alana came out to when she realized she’s trans, etc.

one night i started talking about wanting to pick a more theatre-relevant url for my blog and trans-[character name] urls were getting pretty popular, and at least 3 of the friends i made through rp had changed theirs to coordinating trans-[character name] and i think it was cam suggested i should make mine be trans-alana so i did. eventually i realized the unhyphenated version was available so i changed it to transalana with no hyphen and i have lived here ever since. sometimes i think about changing it but i feel like transalana has become a part of My Brand and i am not so great with coming up with cool names for things.

any side blogs? if you have them, name them and why you have them

in theory, i have sideblogs... i don’t really use them, but of the ones i do have, there is:

emsbookblog - this was supposed to be where i would post excerpts of the book that i’m working on, but i think i did that maybe one time roughly 2 years ago and then promptly forgot about it/got nervous about my writing and was scared to share anything else. the rest of the stuff that is there is assorted writing tips. i don’t really know what to do with it now. i probably should post all my little thoughts about em and anita and caleb there instead of infodumping on my main from time to time, but if i do that then i have to promo a sideblog and direct people over to it which is always annoying to me when i could just do it on this blog which is much easier

dearnovelhansen - this is basically no longer used, but was a sideblog i made specifically to talk/complain about the novel adaptation of Dear Evan Hansen which was about 3 years ago?? maybe? i can’t be trusted to understand the passage of time. but to summarize: i thought it was an honor just to have the story be made more accessible since many of us couldn’t see the stage performance, but i hated a lot of the creative liberties that were taken. my main grumbles are that everyone who isn’t evan or connor is done so dirty in the novel. connor’s still kind of done dirty in the book, but not as much as like. heidi, alana, jared, and zoe are.

horseisle3 - this one was meant to be a place where i could just enthusiastically post screenshots from hi3, but instead it turned into a blog where i occasionally reblog other players’ hi3 content and bitch about how bad the game admins are bc hi3 is the tumblr famous (infamous?) homophobic horse game. the game where it was once okay to call your club store the gulag bc according to their head of hr, ‘it’s just a russian word for prison’ but you can’t say ‘im gay’ without somebody accusing you of corrupting young children who play the game. unfortunately there aren’t very many good interactive horse games out there, so this one is still about as good as it gets. it’s either that or star stable and i don’t care about star stable.

mlaenie - i’ve had this url saved for i don’t even know how long. way way way back in the day when i wanted to escape from the clutches of the onceler fandom i abandoned my first blog where i basically had an alter ego i guess?? and i decided to just be myself on the new blog. i don’t fully remember who came up with it, but one of my sister’s mutuals suggested that if you scrambled the letters in your name you could come up with aesthetic-looking urls. so lauren’s url became lrauen, and to match with her mine became mlaenie, which i abandoned on tumblr after about a year or so? but have continued to use as my main username on twitter, reddit, youtube, xbox, steam, and discord. i barely ever use any of these accounts aside from twitter, steam, and xbox, but yeah. so i’ve decided to try and turn this empty sideblog into a place for video game thoughts maybe. we’ll see how long it lasts this time around.

how long have you been on tumblr?

i made my first tumblr account in december of 2010, but i didn’t understand how to use it at all or how to customize my theme to look cool and unique so i quickly abandoned it. i made a new account in september of 2011 after some kids at school and my sister told me i should and i have been trapped here with varying degrees of activity/inactivity ever since. i have witnessed the rise and fall of the lorax/onceler fandom, hyperfocused on lord of the rings, star wars and back to the future all at the same time, and for the past 4 years i’ve mostly been a musical theatre blog with assorted other fandom stuff mixed in. i feel i have seen everything and nothing, but mostly i’m just tired and bored.

do you have a queue tag?

no bc i don’t use a queue. i’ve tried using it in the past but i irrationally feel pressured to sustain a coherent theme to queued posts and my brain simply does not vibe with that so i just don’t use it at all anymore. Instead i instantly reblog or post several unrelated thoughts in succession and then don’t post again at all for 3 days. the way god intended

why did you start your blog in the first place?

my very first blog was intended to be a place for me to post all of my petz 5 animals’ profile info, but i didn’t have any understanding of how coding worked at all and i don’t think i really wanted to learn, either. so it just sat there, unused. my second attempt at blogging was as a classic rock fandom person, so as you can probably imagine i was pretty pretentious about ‘modern pop’ vs the beatles, the rolling stones, the who, the monkees, and so on. and then i slowly devolved into a lorax fandom blog and everything went to shit so i made a new blog for lord of the rings/the hobbit which later evolved to include star wars and back to the future blogging. and then for the past 4 years i’ve been mainly a musical theatre blog with other random stuff i like thrown haphazardly into the pot. wonderful.

why did you choose your icon/pfp?

because my url is transalana and two of my most prominent lgbt headcanons are that alana beck is trans and a lesbian. i gotta be shouting out @kinqmike though bc she’s the one i adopted the trans alana beck headcanon from in the first place!

why did you choose your header?

in 2017 i was hyperfixating on Dear Evan Hansen (and Be More Chill, but there weren’t many gif-able videos then considering it ran for a month in New Jersey in 2015 and there was only one yet-to-resurface 35 minute bootleg) so i just grabbed a random gif off of google. i really should get to replacing it with a new header of my own though. i just don’t know what i should do for it.

what’s your post with the most notes?

i have lost track of how many notes it has (i think it’s somewhere around 200 now?) but when Will Roland and George Salazar performed Two Player Game on Good Morning America, i posted a screencap of their Jeremy and Michael along with that one quiz answer meme that says stuff like ‘i want to see it grow up healthy’. i didn’t tag it with any ship names or anything because i was anxious about having it show up in the tags, but somebody who reblogged it from me did tag it as boyf riends and i firmly believe it took off because of that. i don’t think i make posts that are relevant enough to amass thousands of notes, even by accident. which is probably a good thing bc if i did i would have to block so many of them.

how many followers do you have?

on this blog? 175 according to the counter. how many of those are still real people and how many are bots and abandoned accounts? i have no idea.

how many people do you follow?

i try to keep it somewhere around 200. i think i’m sitting at 180 right now but i kind of need to go through and clear out the really inactive blogs.

have you made a shitpost?

let’s think about this for a second. i’ve been on tumblr for nearly 10 years. you might even be able to say i’ve made more than one. they’re just not what you would call...popular shitposts.

how do you feel about ‘you need to reblog this’ post?

that stuff makes me so incredibly anxious that i have to fight the urge to want to yeet my laptop or mobile device through the closest window whenever i read it, so i try very hard to avoid any sort of ‘if you don’t reblog this, i’m judging you’ posts. i find them very manipulative and not particularly helpful

do you like tag games?

yeah babey!! i just frequently forget to do them, but please know that if you have ever tagged me in a tag game i felt incredibly touched by the gesture and the @mention even if i completely forgot to do the thing afterward

do you like ask games?

i do! but also rip to literally anyone who has ever sent me an ask meme bc it takes me so long to answer them. i’m still working on a micro fic prompt from a few weeks ago. also, horrified to realized that it has in fact been a few weeks and not 3 days anymore.

which of your mutuals do you think is tumblr famous?

i don’t know that any are tumblr famous as a whole. but probably @neverheardnothing

do you have a crush on a mutual?

in any sort of romantic connotation? no. not that i’m aware of. there are mutuals that i have friend crushes on where i want to be friends with them but i get so anxious when it comes to meeting new people that usually nothing ever comes of it. i’m really not good at small talk or other casual conversation either which, as you may or may not be able to imagine, sucks. i just wanna skip over all of the awkward introductions and ‘hey how are you, how is life, what are you doing with yourself?’ stuff. not because i don’t care about it. i do, but i think most of my friends/the people i want to be my friends are also depressed and anxious so asking these basic questions about life tends to uh. make us all nervous. and i don’t do much with my life so i always have the most boring answers anyways.

i’m not tagging anyone officially bc the @ thing has just completely given up on me at this point, but if you want to do it, go for it. and then say i tagged you so i can read it c:

[mego42]

1x07 Discussion Questions

My b! My b! I usually try to do these when the episode is fresh but instead I went to sleep, I am at peace with my priorities, tbh. As always, many thanks to @pynkhues​ for her time and energy putting these together and shout out to @foxmagpie​ for the assist. 

1. What was your favourite scene of the episode? Tell us why!

Lot of contenders, tbh. I really love the scene with Mary Pat when she puts together the (extremely transparent) bullshit that is the whole secret shopper scheme (I mean come on y’all, did you even try????), I love Ruby and Stan’s date (high five to Stan for coming through with my parks & rec reference, it’s nice to know there is one (1) man I can count on). The Annie and Greg bit is REALLY SWEET LEAVE ME ALONE. The god tier brio content, specifically The Grab Heard Round The World My Living Room and the Give Me A Name bit. Some classic Rio nonsense (do you think if we asked him to point to an egg he’d point to an apple?) Tyler and his “reeeeeeally fill out the surveys?” was, obvs, the best moment on the entire show. Anyway, one of those for sure.

2. Was there any scene that missed the mark for you? And if so, how?

The Boomer setting up Annie stuff always falls flat to me and idk exactly why? Like, individual pieces of it are great, Mae does EXCELLENT work post police station and when getting arrested in the first place but ultimately I find it fairly forgettable in the grand scheme of things.

3. Let’s talk about the secret shopper scheme! What do you think were the strengths of it? The flaws? Do you think it had longterm potential? Or was it always going to crash and burn?

I said this during the rewatch but I straight up blocked out the fact that all of the shoppers are hitting the same store on the same day (waving around upwards of $5k in cash???? no less???????) because my brain cannot comprehend how three women we’re supposed to believe are reasonably intelligent didn’t realize this was the stupidest, most transparently obvious, most short-sighted scheme in the entire world. 

I struggled with the sustainability of it a bit when I thought they were spreading their efforts around (they roped in A Lot of people, there are only so many Costcos in the Detroit metro area and waving around that much cash and then returning it all, again for cash, is uh, already p memorable) but I could deal with it when I thought they were spreading it around. Short-sighted, immediate solutions are a cornerstone of Beth’s brand, after all, but all of them at the same store at the same day???? Too much. I cannot. 

4. The girls spent their money in very different ways! Ruby on romancing Stan, Annie on clothes for her son, and Beth on jewellery for herself. What do you think this tells us about them and their arcs? Particularly coming off the back of Ruby’s conflict with Stan, Ben’s issues at school with clothes, and Beth leaving Rio her pearls?

Love these connects. The show’s got a pretty clearly defined and consistent visual/character motifs (this may or may not be the word I’m looking for, shut up) when it comes to depicting the girls priorities and motivations. You also see it reflected and reinforced with their repeated coping mechanisms throughout the show. Whenever bad stuff happens, Ruby goes home to Stan, Annie crawls into bed with Ben and we usually close with Beth either alone (ouch david) or connecting with Rio in some way (exhibit a: the aforementioned pearls). 

In all of the instances it comes back to the heart of their priorities:

Stan is Ruby’s number one, (which isn’t to say her kids aren’t a part of that, I think Stan is both himself in this sense while also representing her whole Hill family unit—TV is all about visual shorthand kids—but also it serves to illustrate that Ruby has something Beth and Annie do not: a true partner). 

Ben is at the root of everything Annie does, she makes choices based on not only his. well-being, but how he sees her and he has the most influence over how she sees herself and what actions she takes as a result of that.

Beth, on the other hand, is at a contrasting point. She’s done the devoted partner and mother thing (lowkey implied by the little bits and pieces we get of her and Annie’s childhoods to some degree more or less for her entire life) and is now putting herself first, her needs, her wants. Which isn’t to say she doesn’t give a fuck about her family, she waits until she’s got a fat stack of cash and they’re taken care of before splurging on a thing, but as a symbol I think the necklace pretty clearly illuminates that for whatever Beth tells herself, she’s building an empire for herself, bc she wants it, needing it is secondary.

5. Eddie’s arrest is arguably what sets us on a collision course with the finale! Do you think Eddie was loyal to Rio until the end? How much do you think he told Turner? And what sort of loyalty do you think Rio inspires in his boys? And why doesn’t it translate with the girls?

OF COURSE EDDIE WAS LOYAL TO THE END HE HAS CLEARLY DEMONSTRATED HE HAS SOME KIND OF CODE OF HONOR HOW DARE YOU SLANDER MY BOY LIKE THAT.

Tbh idk how to answer the loyalty question without more information from canon because the gang and how they operate, how they all came together, etc is pretty well shrouded in not-central-narrative-focus, though I think it’s been implied somewhat heavily that what’s going on with the girls is not standard operating procedure.

My personal headcanon for Eddie is tied up in my personal backstory for Rio and Mick that I started for my (lmao first) Mick POV fic. I gave Rio and Mick a friends since we were kids backstory and decided Eddie was a kid in their neighborhood, slightly younger then them, and always looked up to them/followed them around/thought they were cool. He ultimately got involved in crime because they did and they looked out for him and brought him up with them (which, you know, makes how it all turns out that much more tragic). Obvs, this is all just me and my tendency to imprint on random side characters and give them backstories. Let me live.

6. This episode introduces us to Mary Pat, who’s probably one of this show’s most complicated antagonists! What do you think of her generally? And could you have predicted her arc with Boomer and Turner?

I love her and I’m done lying to myself about it.

LISTEN, first off, Allison Tolman is great. Her line delivery is fantastic, she has a knack for subtly adding SO MUCH to every scene she’s in and uses her face and inflection and pauses exquisitely. Top notch comedic timing. Truly a gem.

Second, on a character level, the lady is in a bad spot and the girls basically gift-wrapped the circumstances and handed them to her like here is a present!!!!!!!!!!!! What was a struggling girl to do besides accept what was offered to her??????!!!!!!???

7. This episode features a very pivotal scene in terms of the Beth, Ruby and Annie dynamic. What starts as tension between Annie and Beth quickly pivots when Ruby criticises Beth and Annie leaps to her sister’s defence. What do you think this tells us about the dynamic between the girls as pairs and as a trio?

I am so!!!! curious!!!!!!! about the backstory that exists in the writers’ heads for Ruby and Annie (all three of them, really, but the bff and little sister having an independent friendship is of particular interest to me bc it isn’t something you, or I guess I, run into a lot) and how much of it was defined at this point vs how much it’s evolved/fluctuated as the show goes on. This fight pretty clearly illuminated that when it really comes down to it, it’s Beth and Annie vs Ruby which a) breaks my heart and b) isn’t totally a dynamic I think the show ultimately stuck with? Or maybe intentionally fluctuates? Idk this is a half-baked thought. Ask again later. 

8. Greg is the one who kisses Annie! Who do you think left who in that relationship, and/or what were the biggest issues in that relationship?

I feel like there’s pretty much no way Annie wasn’t the one that called things off with Greg. Not just because of how it plays out this time but because he’s got a kind of persistent yet also go with the flow attitude that makes me think he would absorb a lot in the name of making it work whereas Annie seems to have a pretty established history of cutting her losses and bailing when she hits her limit. Based on how fond they are of each other and how much affection they clearly still hold, I tend to assume they just grew apart as they grew up which makes it almost more complicated and tragic because it leaves all of the good stuff and just mixes it with the knowledge that it wasn’t enough. 

9. What did you think of Ruby’s sauce story? And what do you think it meant as a turning point for her arc?

I HATE THIS STORY SO MUCH USED BAND AIDS ARE GROSS ENOUGH ON THEIR OWN WITHOUT MIXING IN FOOD SERVICE AND MONTHS, MONTHS, OF MARINATION. I REFUSE TO TALK ABOUT IT. GET OUT OF MY HOUSE.

10. Knowing that Beth, Ruby and Annie’s system of paying Mary Pat off doesn’t work, do you think there was a way they could’ve handled her on their own that would’ve worked? Or do you think Rio’s intimidation (and potential murder) tactic was the only way out?

Idk maybe I’m just cynical, but I take trust no bitch to heart, they pretty well screwed themselves into a corner by being idiots.