#also SORRY i wrote this like 2 days ago and then accidentally threw it in the drafts instead of posting it
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dunno whether you've talked about this before but like feelings on Katara saying "you didn't love her like I did" and then literally not apologising ever (and the implication that by now Sokka is used to it and doesn't believe he deserves better)
hellooo!!
i have LOTS of thoughts on that scene. the whole episode, actually.
i understand it was a zuko-centric moment of the series. i understand that it was meant to be an episode dedicated to katara and zuko and their connection/relationship (and lack thereof pre-southern raiders). BUT i just hate how sokka was thrown to the side.
the show starts with sokka and katara. above everything, it’s ALWAYS been sokka and katara. but we never actually get a lot of info on either of them pre-atla. we know they lost their mother young (and katara witnessed it), we know their father left (and it impacted sokka largely), we know sokka felt like he was supposed to be the ‘man’ of the village, we know katara washes sokka’s socks? see what i mean… there’s not much to work with. so when we DO get more info on a crucial part of their childhoods, why is it focused solely on katara?
it’s established very early on that kya’s death is significant to katara and that she hasn’t been able to move on even after all this time. it’s hinted that sokka is generally less caught up on his mother’s death than katara. it’s implied that this is because his father told him to be strong and be a man and protect katara/the tribe. BUT we get some insight into the impact of kya’s death on sokka in ‘The Runaway’ - (WHICH KATARA HEARD HIM SAY, BTW. makes her comment in ‘The Southern Raiders’ a little more harsh…) it’s all been said before that sokka grieves differently than katara and her “you didn’t love her the way i did” comment was outta pocket for that matter, etc etc wbk. i won’t cover that again.
the thing is, i actually DON’T have an issue with her comment in that scene. sure it’s insensitive and wrong, but i completely get it. she’s angry, she’s hurt, she’s confused as to why her own brother isn’t supporting her in a matter regarding their mother. she lashed out. i do it to my own sister all the time. but my issue lies with the fact that the writers didn’t do ANYTHING to address the scene later on.
a large part of atla is growth and healing (see: aang going from a goof to a fully realised avatar; zuko’s entire arc; sokka learning and growing out of his misogynistic beliefs, etc…) so it feels wrong to just leave sokka and katara’s argument (is it an argument? anyways yk The scene) hanging without proper closure. it didn’t even have to be a full apology scene if they didn’t wanna add it - katara could’ve just had a throwaway line like, “i have to go talk to sokka” or something simple like that. also quick side note WHY did aang rush up to katara on the dock at the end of the ep??? nothing that happened even concerns him. it shoulda been sokka.
ANYWAYS yeah an apology was definitely needed somewhere in the episode. or just like.. more sokka towards the end. idk about sokka but if MY sibling went to avenge our mother’s death i think i’d like to know the outcome of everything that happened, yk?
the show starts with sokka and katara. above everything, it’s ALWAYS been sokka and katara. but they seem to forget this during ‘The Southern Raiders’ for some reason. the episode is great, but it could’ve been stronger with more scenes between katara and sokka - ESPECIALLY if they included an apology scene.
also one more thing: i think it’s insane that sokka was supposedly getting laid while zuko was planning to help katara to hunt down their mother’s killer like how do u put these two scenes back-to-back wth-
anyways thx for the ask xoxo i don’t know if i even made a proper point here but have fun reading my spiel.
#ask#atla#sokka#katara#the southern raiders#also SORRY i wrote this like 2 days ago and then accidentally threw it in the drafts instead of posting it#anyways here it is now <3#analysis
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You Were Made To Be Mine - 2.
Pirate!Bucky x Mermaid!Reader
Part 2 of this series
Run-through: Bucky is one of the greatest pirates ever known. Living peacefully in his vast and flourishing archipelago; filthy rich and respected by all those around him. He is the leader of his people and his massive fleet, and is viewed as no less than a king by his crew and the people on his lands. He, however, has a secret that he keeps from everyone. The infamous and brawny pirate has lost his heart to one of the most beautiful creations he’s ever seen – you. Ever since the moment he saw you, he knew that you were meant to be his. But he belonged to the earth, you to the ocean. Could love and resilience somehow find a way to unite two worlds?
Themes: mermaid!reader, mythological elements, pirate!bucky, fluff, angst
Bucky had never experienced heartache before.
But right now, as he was sat alone on the rock where he usually met up with you at nightfall, he concluded that no pain was more terrible than the heartache he felt when you didn’t show up at your regular meeting spot one night.
His throat hurt given he had called out your name so much and so loudly for the past hour or so. Usually, whenever he called, you’d show up within seconds. But today, it had been over an hour and there was no sign of you. Fear, worry, guilt and pain – it all hit him right in the face like a harsh wave.
“Where are you, my little pearl?” he murmured to himself in his hoarse voice as he sat on the rock alone, sulking and missing you so terribly he felt physically sick. Now he understood why the saddest lovers wrote the most devastatingly beautiful poems because right now Bucky felt overwhelmed by emotions he didn’t know one could feel and if he had a pen and paper in hand, he would write the most melancholic of poems while he pines for you as well.
My little pearl… Bucky chuckled sadly at the nickname he gave you a while ago. It started when one day you brought him the prettiest shell you had ever found, and inside it was a lovely, shiny little pearl.
-
“Isn’t it the prettiest thing you’ve ever seen?” you had asked, excitedly showing him what you had found that day.
Bucky nodded. “It is pretty, but not more that you.” And since, he loved how you blushed and hid your face each time he called you ‘his little pearl’ after that. And given the ocean was your home, the nickname was very fitting.
-
The fear settled in not long after. What if you were lost somewhere and you couldn’t find your way back? What if you were injured? What if you were lost and injured and couldn’t call out for help? What if… what if you had found a merman and decided to stay because Bucky wasn’t worth it? He knew he was being ridiculous but he couldn’t help but think so.
No!
Bucky’s possessive nature took over and he was going crazy with each passing moment spent in your absence. His anger soon morphed into complete and utter sadness. And he was miserable. He had seen you just a day ago, but he missed you terribly already. Your hair, your soft lips, the vibrant colors of your tail, your warm but damp hugs; all of you.
He stayed put there for the entire night, alert and waiting. But you didn’t show up. Bucky waited until dawn, and he rowed back to his island; sad and heartbroken. Did you leave him? Were you lost? Did you find someone else? Were you injured or trapped somewhere because of your obsession with that mythical potion?
If it weren’t for Steve running into him as he made his way home, Bucky would’ve shed a tear or two. That’s how much he was hurting.
“You look like a mess.” Steve pointed out. “Where have you been?” he asked, clearly seeing that something was wrong with Bucky.
Been waiting for the love of my life to show up at our usual meeting spot, but she didn’t come. I don’t know if she’s mad, or in trouble or hurt, or all of that. “Just out.” Bucky replied and made his way to his home, in desperate need for some hours of sleep.
-
Nightfall came again and Bucky rowed back to the isles at around midnight. He didn’t find you on the rock like he always did, again. He didn’t see the flicker of excitement of your fins as he got closer. He didn’t see you. And his heart felt like it was being torn apart.
He called out your name again. And again. And again like a madman. But you didn’t show up. Bucky waited on top of the rock again, looking up at the starry night sky and drowning in his sadness. Then out of nowhere, he heard the soft splash of water he knew all too well.
“Sweetheart, is that you?” he sat up straight and looked around; alert again. He heard the splash again. And the spark of hope inside him which was fading out, came to life again. With the help of the burning torch by his side, he could see quite well.
And then he saw it. The shiny tail, the silky fins and the beautiful face he was madly, dangerously and hopelessly in love with.
“Y/N!” he called out your name and didn’t think twice before jumping in the water and met you in the middle as you made your way to him. You had the biggest smile on your face as he swam towards you. He threw his arms around you and held on to you to keep himself afloat but also to hold you as close to him as possible.
You giggled at how he behaved almost like a little child, clinging to you for dear life. You wouldn’t lie, supporting the muscular man and yourself above water was a little hard. But you welcomed his almost suffocating embrace without any complaints because you had missed him terribly and you were aware you hadn’t come to meet him yesterday so you had to make up for it.
“I missed you!” you wrapped your arms around his broad shoulders and your lower body worked extra hard to keep the two of you above the surface.
Bucky almost shed tears, he couldn’t believe you were here in flesh and blood, not a fragment of his imagination, but the real you. “Never disappear like that ever again, you hear me?” he sounded relieved and angry and heartbroken all at once as he chided you but also held you like you were the most precious thing in the world.
“I won’t, I promise. I’m sorry.” You whispered in his ear, pushing your face into the crook of his neck and relished his warmth. The water was cool, so his body heat felt heavenly. Bucky pulled away and swam on his own for a bit, realizing that he had shifted all his weight onto you earlier.
“Where the hell were you?” he sounded hurt. “I was waiting, I waited the whole night.” He recalled how upset he was last night and you felt guilty for not showing up.
“I’m sorry.”
“Sorry doesn’t explain why you didn’t show up! Where were you?” he wasn’t going to let you go without getting the truth out.
You hung your head down in shame and guilt. And Bucky knew what that look meant. “Come on up.” He swam over to the rocks and climbed up, thinking you were right behind him. But when he turned to look at you, he found you still in the water. He frowned. “Sweetheart, come on up.” He held his hand out for you. You swam a little closer but stayed in the water.
“I’m… I’m good here actually.” You tried your hardest to convince him but he didn’t buy any of it. He raised an eyebrow at your words.
“You don’t want to come up on our rock?” he sounded confused. And you couldn’t help but faintly smile at how it was ‘our rock’.
You shook your head gently. “No, I’m fine here.” You lied.
Bucky sighed in frustration. “Okay, just…” he exhaled loudly. “Tell me what’s going on, okay? Because first you disappear out of nowhere, then you come back a day later and act like this. What is going on?” he had the right to be a little mad. Hell, if he just disappeared out of nowhere like that you would be pretty upset as well.
You kept your head hung and decided to just be honest and tell him truth. So you began; you told Bucky about how you went to search for the potion. And how you accidentally found yourself in unknown, deep, dark and dangerous waters; far from home. And how you got lost for a long while, and almost became the meal to larger predators. And how you escaped, but were injured because one of them chased you and almost sank its teeth completely into your tail. You told him how you returned home; worn out, injured and bleeding and unable to swim properly. One of your siblings tended to your wound as soon as you got home but the pain was so bad that you passed out for hours and only woke up a few minutes ago.
Bucky listened attentively. Each new piece of information about the terrible situation hit him like a violent storm; leaving him breathless and mind blown in the worst way. So his gut feeling had been right all along; you were indeed lost and hurt so far away from him. And had things turned out just a little differently, he would perhaps never see you again.
Bucky remained quiet even when you were done talking, sheepishly filling him in on all that you did and all that happened to you. You knew a long lecture about your safety was coming sooner or later. But honestly, this time you deserved it. Then again, you were doing this for both of you. You were desperate to be part of his world and share this life with him, and you couldn’t do so until you were able to walk the ground he walks on.
After a few long minutes of silence, after processing all of it, he spoke up, “Let me see it.” He asked, referring to the wound you had gotten.
You got to the sandy shore and waited for Bucky to approach you with the burning touch in his hand. He squatted down beside you and inspected your tail thanks to the light provided by the torch. He found the wound at around the middle of your tail. A long, irritated and bloody gash. Part of which was wrapped in algae; he remembered you telling him that some algae were used as medicines by merpeople.
His demeanor changed as soon as he saw the wound. He felt guilty, because he was the initial reason why you were chasing after this potion. In some ways, although indirectly, he was the reason why you were hurt and he almost lost you forever had it not been for luck or your extreme survival skills and courage.
“What was it?” he asked, his voice was calm but it didn’t hide his anger nor his guilt completely.
“I didn’t see. It was too dark down there. But it was big and scary and loud.”
You could feel something bad was coming. A gut feeling, or something told you that something was going to happen soon which would hurt you a hundred times more than the wound on your body. Bucky planted the torch on the sand, a few feet far from where you sat, and he plopped down next to you. And something told you he was gathering the courage to say something which was going to break you.
Truth is, he was hurting. Hurting so bad that he wanted to scream and shout and beg someone, anyone, to make it stop. Like a thousand cuts, open and raw and bleeding – the pain was indescribable. He almost lost you, and he was going crazy just thinking about it. His head was almost dizzy and his heart was racing. He wasn’t thinking straight. All he knew was that he was the reason why you could’ve gotten killed and worse part is, if you did – he would never know.
“I can’t risk losing you.” he said, looking down at the sand beneath him.
You watched him intently. It always amazed you how perfect his side profile was. Perfect lips, perfect nose. Only today, his pretty eyes were sad. “You’re not going to. I’m fine. I came back, didn’t I?”
“Yeah but you also almost got eaten by some mysterious sea monster. And if you did, that would be on me.”
Oh no… you knew where this was going. “But I didn’t. I-,”
He cut you off quickly. “I love you, alright? I love you and I never knew it was humanly possible to love someone this much. But Y/N, I can’t sit here and watch you try to get yourself killed over something which probably doesn’t exist!” he paused, chest heaving as he tried to contain his emotions. “What if you go out there tomorrow and this time you didn’t come back? What then?”
You hung your head down as the image of a heartbroken Bucky filled your head. “What happened yesterday isn’t going to happen again. I know what to look out for now.”
“Do you?” he asked calmly, trying to make you realize that this was wrong. “You need to get this myth and give up this crazy obsession, you hear me? Why can’t we be normal and happy without it? Why can’t we just-,”
You cut him off rather coldly. “Because look at us!” you raised your voice a little. “There’s nothing normal about us! We can’t be anything more than this without it, it’s our only hope, why don’t you get it? We both want the same thing, Buck. I need to be with you, I want to. And this will-,”
He shook his head and then turned to you, “Can’t you see what’s happening? You almost got killed because of it!” he was getting hyper too.
You waited a little while before answering, trying to read him. “Not being with you is killing me as well.”
That broke him.
His anger vanished into thin air. “Come here, my little pearl.” His voice softened as he carefully pulled you onto his lap. Your tail rested sideways on his lap and you placed your head on his shoulder while his wrapped his arm protectively around you. “You got hurt because of me.” He stated softly.
You sighed and persisted. “No.”
He pressed his lips to the side of your head. “Yes, and that can’t keep happening. I won’t allow you put yourself in danger on my account.”
No… “Please don’t leave me.” You pushed your face into the crook of his neck to hide your tears. “Please.”
He sighed. “Can you promise me you will stop looking for that thing?”
“No.” You held on to the hope with all your heart that you will find it one day. You knew you were really close to finding it too, you couldn’t possibly give up now. Besides, once you did you and Bucky could be together forever without the barrier of physical differences and that was the only thing which mattered.
Bucky sighed in frustration. “This makes me feel so selfish. And guilty. And just overall terrible. You’re putting yourself in danger, you’re getting chased by predators, and you’re getting hurt and all for what? Me?” he paused and pulled away to look at you. “I love you that way you are, you don’t have to change for me. Just stop looking for this thing.” He sounded much calmer than before.
This was another fear of yours. How long would he be indifferent to the fact that you both were of different kinds? “A few years from now, you’re gonna want a wife. You’ll want kids, and a family. And I wouldn’t be able to give you any of that.”
“I don’t want any of that if it’s not with you.”
You sighed. He did too. Then he made a decision which hurt him more than anything. The sight of you wounded was heartbreaking. And he didn’t want to find you with a bigger wound the next day, or worse, he didn’t want you to lose your life. He would rather you live the rest of your life safely, without him, rather than risk your life trying to be with him.
“I have to let you go, my love.” he whispered the words you wished you hadn’t heard. You immediately circled your arms around him tighter and sniffled, nuzzling his neck.
“Please don’t.” you whispered. Bucky let the tear fall finally, unable to hold it in. You spoke again, “Each day I wake up and find that more and more of my people are moving far from here. It’s just a matter of time before they all leave, leaving me behind.”
The thought of you all alone down there where he couldn’t physically reach you or protect you was no less than a nightmare. But that path that you’d have to go down just to be with him was scary as well, and it would hurt you. So Bucky convinced himself that he was doing this for your own good. He took a deep breath, feeling a lump forming in his throat. “I have to do this.”
You sniffled again, tightening your arms around him. “No. You can’t give up on me. You’re all I have, Buck. Please.” You pleaded. He kissed the side of your head and cradled your head gently like you were a fragile glass figurine.
“You can have a long and beautiful life ahead. One where you won’t have to leave your home, where you won’t have to change or chase after a myth or get hurt-,” he stopped talking when he heard a sob escape your lips. He pulled you closer and hugged you tighter.
“No.” you cried, wetting his skin with your warm tears.
He tried to swallow the lump in his throat.
“I love you, more than anything. And I know I will never be able to love another. But for your own well-being, I need to let you go. Because although it will kill me each day, I would rather live with the relief that you’re out there alive somewhere rather than live with the guilt that you got yourself killed while trying to be with me.” Bucky tried his hardest to keep his voice steady. He couldn’t.
“Don’t leave me.” Another sob left your lips.
He sighed, his breath shaky. “Don’t cry, sweetheart. You’re the best thing that’s ever happened to me. I love you, I always will. But I can’t see you getting hurt like this because of me. This is for your own good.” He pressed one last kiss to the top of your head and carefully lifted you off his lap and set you down on the sand again.
He got up and your heart began racing much faster than earlier. You felt like you were about to pass out again. Your heartache morphed into rage inside of you, but you managed to contain it. “This is it then, huh? You’re just gonna leave me here like everyone else and forget me and move on with your life?” your sounded bitter and you had every right to be.
Bucky looked down at you and blinked his tears away. “I could never forget you. And I will love you till my dying day. Believe me, this isn’t any easier for me. But this is the only way to stop you from getting yourself hurt or killed. You need to let go of that madness.”
You chuckled dryly at his words. Borderline angry, borderline hurt. “You were wrong when you said you were selfish. You’re not just that, but you’re a coward as well.” Bucky watched how you wiped your tears and got back into the water. And before you swam away, you turned around to look at him. “If you change your mind, I hope you hurt just like you’re hurting me. But unlike you, I won’t be giving up on us.” You spat at him before you swam away as fast as you could.
As he watched you leave, he second guessed what he had done. He hoped you didn’t think that he loved you any less because you were different and belonged to a different world than him.
You didn’t think that way. And you knew he loved you just as much as you loved him but you had never expected him to take such drastic steps. You were hurting and before you knew it, you found yourself diving deeper. And while overthinking and bearing your heartache, realization hit a little later than usual and you found yourself swimming further and further away from home; into deeper and darker waters…
-
When Bucky got back home, he was greeted by his close friends all waiting for him in the well-lit dining room; all sat around the large, oval stone table with goblets in front of them. Bucky tried his hardest to greet them like he normally did.
“You know we can see right through your bullshit, right?” Sam spoke first. The rest of his friends stared at him and Bucky knew that they knew that something was up. They were the closest friends he had, they were family and he knew they could see right through him.
“What do you mean?” Bucky asked, trying to act cool and received a bunch of groans and sighs of frustrations.
Steve spoke up next, “You leave almost every day at midnight. You row to God knows where, then you come back at the crack of dawn. And now you look like you’re a sad trader who just lost all his ships.” Steve spoke almost teasingly, but his concern could be heard in his voice.
“We’re your family, you know you can tell us anything.” Thor spoke up next.
“What is it, Barnes? Tell us.” Okoye spoke after. She was the kindest, strongest woman Bucky had ever come across.
Bucky hesitated. Oh so they noticed? He was glad that they did, because that would make talking about it a little easier. Only the issue here was, would they believe him if he told them the truth? Or would they just think that he’s lost it?
“Bucky. Talk.” Sam was beginning to lose his patience.
Bucky took a deep breath as he took a seat at the table as well. He grabbed the nearby jug of wine and filled the goblet closest to him and took a long sip. Then exhaled loudly and began talking.
“It’s… a woman.” His first few words earned him curious looks and a smirk from Okoye. “Well, not exactly a woman but…”
Ten minutes later, Bucky finally finished filling his friends in on all that’s been going on for the past many months. He told them about his unusual love life involving you. And how things began getting complicated and then gave them necessary details about your recent break up. They listened with straight faces. And despite being a bunch who always joked around, they were surprisingly serious as he talked.
When he was done, his friends were all quiet for a whole minute. Then Okoye spoke up,“You broke that poor thing’s heart when she spent all this time loving you?”
When she put it like that, something shattered inside Bucky. “I… I love her and I couldn’t sit there and watch her-,” Bucky stopped talking as Okoye shot him a glare. And that glare spoke volumes so he immediately stopped talking.
“Don’t make excuses. You broke her heart.” Okoye said in her no nonsense tone. “She wanted to come live with you. Among us. What’s so wrong with that?”
Bucky answered quickly after taking another sip of wine. “There’s nothing wrong with that. But how could I support that decision of hers when it would only hurt her even more. And the worse thing is, even if she’s trapped somewhere down there, I would never know.” he took a deep breath. “What if she dies chasing this god damned potion? What about me then?”
His words did make his friends think some more. Maybe his intention had been right, but the way he dealt with the situation wasn’t so right.
Steve whispered under his breath, “Well, love really does make people go crazy.”
Bucky spoke up again. “She was so hell bent and obsessed with finding that nonsense that she wasn’t realizing she was putting herself in danger.” His chest heaved, his emotions choking him. “She shouldn’t have to change for my love. She should embrace who she is and live her life. And be safe and happy.” At this point, he began doubting his own words and actions.
Could he himself live without you? How long could he pretend that ‘doing the right thing’ wasn’t killing him already?
“Why are you so against the potion?” Thor asked.
Bucky ran a hand through his hair. “Because it doesn’t exist. It’s a myth, a legend.”
“How do you know?” Sam asked, leaning back in his seat. His brown eyes staring into Bucky’s blue ones. “Months ago merpeople were myths to you as well. Now you’re foolishly in love with one of them.” he reasoned.
Bucky got really quiet again and avoided everyone’s eyes. Had he… had he made a terrible, terrible mistake?
Steve spoke up, leaning his elbows on the stone table. “Look, all this potions and merpeople, this all just proves that there’s a whole other world beneath us that we know nothing about. We should respect them. For their own safety, and we could at least try and protect them by keeping this a secret just between us.” He paused then stared at Bucky, “What we shouldn’t do is break their hearts when they’ve fallen in love with us!”
Yup, he deserved that one.
“You said it yourself, family and friends first. She’s your girl, she’s family. The least you could do was trust her and not give up on her.” Sam said in a serious tone. “Besides, how can you say for sure that she’ll give up on trying to find that potion now?”
Well shit. He hadn’t thought about that. He froze, tensing up at Sam’s words. Shit, shit, shit.
“You should go apologize. Now.” Okoye suggested.
Bucky groaned and wanted to bang his head on the wall. “She took off. She’s mad at me.” He mumbled and his friends all rolled their eyes at him and groaned in annoyance, mainly at his stupidity.
-
Heeding his friends’ words, Bucky went to find you the next day at nightfall. Except he didn’t have to be sneaky this time because they all knew he was leaving. But when he got to the isle and called out your name, you didn’t show up.
And a bad vibe loomed around him and around the place. He knew immediately that he had indeed, majorly messed up. He shouldn’t have let go of you like that. He thought he was doing the right thing but turns out, he ruined the best thing in his life.
Bucky waited at the shore. Heartbroken and hurt and angry – at himself. He was just trying to keep you safe. But in doing so, had he just lost the love of his life? For good this time?
#bucky barnes au#bucky barnes x reader#bucky barnes imagine#pirate!bucky#mermaid!reader#bucky barnes smut#bucky barnes fluff#marvel au#bucky barnes
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maybe, just maybe
pairing: hufflepuff!jeno x slytherin!reader
genre: fluff
word count: 4.2k
summary: jeno was perfect, maybe everyone was sick of his perfectness, maybe it wasn’t everyone, maybe it was just you.
alternatively: you’re in love with jeno but it takes 2 rainstorms, months of longingly staring, a missing overweight cat, and a love potion to realize it
a/n: i wrote this two years ago so its not great and its bullet point which is annoying
━━ *✭˚・゚✧*・゚*✭˚・゚✧*・゚* *✭˚・゚✧*・゚*✭˚・゚✧*・゚*
oh look at perfect jeno, with his perfect marks, his perfect attitude, his perfect quidditch skills
his perfect hair, his perfect smile
his perfect face
maybe everyone was sick of his perfectness
maybe it wasn’t everyone
maybe it was just you
━━ *✭˚・゚✧*・゚*✭˚・゚✧*・゚* *✭˚・゚✧*・゚*✭˚・゚✧*・゚*
“do you see what jeno is doing over there? he literally volunteered to polish the fucking candelabras, there’s something off about him, something he’s hiding, no one can be that nice”
renjun threw a grape at your head forcing you to pry your eyes off of the innocent boy doing a good deed while eating a blueberry muffin across the dining hall to glower at your best friend
“but he is that nice” renjun huffed not up for another 10 hour tangent about how jeno was obviously wearing a wig ‘because no ones hair can naturally be that fluffy it’s literally not possible’
“well jeno can suck my dick”
“you’d like that wouldn’t you”
you gasped and chucked a half eaten scone towards him earning a few curious glances from some third years who quickly looked away when met by your glare
“why am i even friends with you?”
renjun had the audacity to roll his eyes “because i’m the only person who can stand to listen to you pine over jeno everyday without wanting to rip my ears off, and sometimes even i romanticize the idea”
“shut up it’s not pining, i hate him and i’m leaving, i refuse to sit here and be attacked” you said hurriedly, grabbing a peach in your hand, and scoffing before stomping dramatically out of the room
renjun snorted and continued eating
━━ *✭˚・゚✧*・゚*✭˚・゚✧*・゚* *✭˚・゚✧*・゚*✭˚・゚✧*・゚*
jeno looked up from candelabra just in time to see you exit the dining hall flipping your hair back flamboyantly before stocking off down the corridor
he smiled to himself
━━ *✭˚・゚✧*・゚*✭˚・゚✧*・゚* *✭˚・゚✧*・゚*✭˚・゚✧*・゚*
you rubbed your eyes as you left the slytherin common room to begin your nightly patrol as prefect
(jeno was a prefect as well, of fucking course he was (this didn’t bother you at all (okay it did (a lot))))
the walk around the halls was always calm and relaxing
except when you saw that annoying ghost peeves
you hated peeves almost as much as jeno
key word almost
you took a step around the corner of the hall and that’s when it hit you
no like literally hit you
someone had actually hit you
you stumbled backwards in shock, lighting up your wand quickly to see which annoying brat was out of bed despite the paintings complaints
what you saw definitely wasn’t AN annoying brat
it was THE annoying brat
“jeno?”
jeno was standing there, wide eyed, in his slightly over sized pale beige striped pajamas, with a little bit of mint toothpaste on the corner of his mouth, in pure panic
“oh my gosh! i’m so sorry! are you okay?” jeno was almost yelling looking like he was about to cry
you shushed him (naturally)
“i’m fine don’t worry i’m okay” your voice was hushed and way softer than usual almost getting caught in your throat
like you were caught in his pretty eyes
what?
ignore that
he heaved a sigh of relief but his shoulders remained tense
he looked around your shoulder and whenever he spoke it was as if he wasn’t even looking at you
“umm jeno?”
he only hummed
“are you okay?”
“no”
that certainly was not the answer you had expected
“what wrong?” you didn’t know why you were asking this, why you cared.
you hated him
“i-my cat-“ he stumbled over his words almost cutely
“i lost my cat have you seen a cat?” he asked his voice full of desperation
he squat down holding his hand about 30cm off the ground “shes white with gray spots and umm about this tall”
he moved his hands apart as if he was holding a large book “and she’s about this wide, i know she’s a little pudgy- okay a lot pudgy, but i love her a lot okay!”
if jeno wasn’t so panicked you would have laughed
“i haven’t seen her sorry” you told him and the look on his face made your heart break
he stood up looking down at his feet “that’s okay she’s a strong cat i’m sure she can surv-“
“but i can help you look for her” you cut him off words surprising both him and yourself
“WOULD YOU REALLY” jeno spoke overjoyed earning multiple shushes from the paintings
then he pulled you into a suffocating bear hug muttering thank you over and over again
stupid jeno and his stupid perfect warm hugs
when he let you go all you could do was stand there in shock he noticed your expression and blushed
which was awful by the way
clearly embarrassed he put a hand on the back of his neck and looked down again “sorry that was a bit weird wasn’t it?”
yes very
do it again
“only a little” you laughed quietly and his eyes shone bright as he laughed with you
it took about 30 minutes to find his cat
of course his stupid fat cat couldn’t stay hidden for longer
how inconsiderate
when jeno saw his cat (who’s name turned out to be ‘cuddles, because that totally wasn’t the cutest this ever) he squealed and the cat came running towards you both rubbing it’s head against jeno’s leg
you didn’t know cats were capable of this much affection
but of course perfect jeno was the exception
he just had to be a fucking cat whisperer didn’t he
“you should get back to bed it’s not your shift anyways, you need sleep” your words broke him out of his cat trance
he sighed looking almost sad
but why would he look sad?
he had no reason to be sad
who made jeno sad?
“this was fun” he said with his annoyingly perfect voice
you said nothing only gave him a small smile
cause that’s all he deserved
okay he deserved more
shut up
“i guess i’ll be going then goodnight yn”
you hated how perfect your name sounded coming from his lips
you watched as he walked off making his way back to the hufflepuff common room
“goodnight”
━━ *✭˚・゚✧*・゚*✭˚・゚✧*・゚* *✭˚・゚✧*・゚*✭˚・゚✧*・゚*
“ugh i hate him so much renjun i didn’t get to sleep because of him and his stupid fat cat”
“you were on duty you didn’t get to sleep anyways”
“shut up”
━━ *✭˚・゚✧*・゚*✭˚・゚✧*・゚* *✭˚・゚✧*・゚*✭˚・゚✧*・゚*
the day was beautiful
the birds were singing, the wind lightly blew the grass around where you and renjun were sitting, and the coast was jeno clear
wait false alarm
there he was standing at the outskirts of the forest feeding the baby animals like the fucking saint he was
“the day is no longer beautiful”
renjun laughed
shit you said that out loud didn’t you
━━ *✭˚・゚✧*・゚*✭˚・゚✧*・゚* *✭˚・゚✧*・゚*✭˚・゚✧*・゚*
the next time you saw jeno (aka the 12th time that week (not including class) not that you were counting or anything) you were both in the library
he sat at a table surrounded by friends his nose scrunching occasionally whenever he read something he didn’t quite understand
you watched as he delicately flipped the pages of the old book
god you really wished you were a book right now
wait
what the fuck
no
you hadn’t realized you were staring until renjun waved a textbook in front of your face snapping your attention back to him
“hello earth to yn” renjun wanted to yell but it was a library and he had manners “you going to help me with this project or keep staring at mr.perfect?”
“i wasn’t staring”
“okay so now we’re out here telling blatant lies, okay hun, i see how it is” as he spoke your eyes began to drift back over to the table where jeno sat and renjun was not having it
snap snap snap bitch renjun's hand was snapping right in front your face and you were afraid he was going to accidentally (not so accidentally) hit you
“still not staring” you muttered “why would i stare at someone i hate?”
“kill me now”
you decided to actually work before renjun went crazy
also you didn’t want perfect jeno to make you fail
you’d never live it down
you and renjun finished up your research a few hours later to both of your relief
you gathered up all of your stuff to go as renjun put the books back
you looked over at where jeno sat to see if he was still there
because you were annoyed that he was
that’s why you were checking
no other reason
you were surprised to see him sitting there looking right back at you
he smiled his perfect smile and waved
you bit your lip and gave him a shy wave back not knowing what else to do
you turned away quickly to search for renjun who had probably already left without you, hearing the laughter of jeno's friends behind you
━━ *✭˚・゚✧*・゚*✭˚・゚✧*・゚* *✭˚・゚✧*・゚*✭˚・゚✧*・゚*
you found yourself at a quidditch match between hufflepuff and ravenclaw
it was the first time you’d been to a quidditch match since your second year and you decided to go now because renjun wanted to be there
━━ *✭˚・゚✧*・゚*✭˚・゚✧*・゚* *✭˚・゚✧*・゚*✭˚・゚✧*・゚*
renjun did not want to be there
━━ *✭˚・゚✧*・゚*✭˚・゚✧*・゚* *✭˚・゚✧*・゚*✭˚・゚✧*・゚*
before you had entered the stands to sit in a crowd of screaming people there was a tap on your shoulder
you turned around quickly ready to fight who you thought was renjun for being late
it wasn’t renjun
jeno stood there dressed in his quidditch uniform slightly sweaty from practice beforehand
(and god was it hot)
because of course he was hot because he was stupid mr.perfect who could even make sweating look good
you were livid
jeno smiled at you
you couldn’t help but smile back
“i saw you walking over so i decided to come say hi if that’s okay” jeno spoke uncertain but his voice remained bright
“it’s okay” you said quietly “hi”
“i’ve never seen you at a match before” jeno inquired and something bubbled in your chest
“i haven’t been to one in a while i came because renjun wanted too” you said shyly fiddling with your sleeve
━━ *✭˚・゚✧*・゚*✭˚・゚✧*・゚* *✭˚・゚✧*・゚*✭˚・゚✧*・゚*
renjun did not want too
━━ *✭˚・゚✧*・゚*✭˚・゚✧*・゚* *✭˚・゚✧*・゚*✭˚・゚✧*・゚*
“i don’t see renjun?” jeno laughed
just as the word ‘renjun’ came out of his mouth the boy himself came around the corner beginning to yell a loud “YOUR KING HAS ARRIVED” before noticing jeno with you
renjun backed the fuck out of there
“well i guess now i do see a renjun” you laughed at that and jeno's smile traveled to his eyes
when you didn’t say anything jeno spoke up again “so i noticed you’re not wearing anything yellow. how can you cheer me on without wearing any yellow?”
you were flustered “i um-“
“WAIT UNLESS-“ jeno gasped dramatically placing a hand over his heart “are you not cheering for me?”
you couldn’t help but giggle “of course i’m cheering for you”
how could you not
he was mr.perfect after all
“well then here” jeno said pulling a yellow scarf from out of his uniform pocket “wear it for me okay? i have to go now before couch gets angry”
he placed scarf around your neck and looked at you smiling “there. i’ll see you later yn”
then he left
and stupid perfect jeno had bested you again
how dare he make you wear his soft perfect scarf
he must know how much this hurt your pride
renjun was going to have a field day
━━ *✭˚・゚✧*・゚*✭˚・゚✧*・゚* *✭˚・゚✧*・゚*✭˚・゚✧*・゚*
“yn stop playing with his scarf and look at the game”
“no i hate quidditch”
“i can see him looking at you right now and he looks sad you’re not watching”
“what really?” you looked up quick
jeno was not looking
at least not anymore
renjun laughed
“i hate him” you mumbled
“and you” you added for good measure
━━ *✭˚・゚✧*・゚*✭˚・゚✧*・゚* *✭˚・゚✧*・゚*✭˚・゚✧*・゚*
you were exhausted
your head was laid on the dining hall table and you were ready to sleep for eternity
“did you even sleep at all last night? jesus yn, you look awful” renjun’s voice was teasing but laced in concern
“thanms” you mumbled lifting your head attempting to sarcastically thank him but not having the energy
“wow you’re a mess” he laughed ruffling your already messy hair, trying to make it worse
“ugh i hate you” you grumbled just when a soft hand was placed on your shoulder
“you hate me?” the voice behind you laughed brightly
oh god you knew that voice
why did he have energy this early
showing off how he was superior again
you hated it
“jeno” you said as you turned to smile at him
“you didn’t answer my question” he teased sitting down beside you
uninvited you may add
okay maybe you tapped the seat for him to sit but only a little
“of course i don’t hate you” renjun rolled his eyes so hard you were surprised he didn’t roll with them
“well that’s good because i brought you some coffee” he said making a car sound as he moved the coffee across the table towards you “you looked tired and i drink this every day so i thought you’d like it”
it’s like he wanted you to hate him
how dare he be so nice
making you feel special
doing good deeds
playing with your emotions
being too fucking perfect
renjun saw you glare at the cup and had to leave because of how hard he was laughing
jeno asked if renjun was okay and you just waved him off
“thank you” you hummed and reached for the cup
the coffee tasted like caramel and had the perfect amount of milk and the perfect amount of sugar
you loved it
and you hated that
━━ *✭˚・゚✧*・゚*✭˚・゚✧*・゚* *✭˚・゚✧*・゚*✭˚・゚✧*・゚*
“hey man are you okay? you just started wheezing out of nowhere, yn says you’re fine but i just wanted to be sure” jeno asked the next time he saw renjun in the hall
renjun died again
━━ *✭˚・゚✧*・゚*✭˚・゚✧*・゚* *✭˚・゚✧*・゚*✭˚・゚✧*・゚*
you were taking a walk around the school grounds to clear your mind of stress from upcoming assignments
you got lost in thought as flitterby moths flew around and landed on flowers in front of you
that was at least until a loud perfect voice came from over the hill calling your name
you moved your eyes from the moths who hadn’t even been startled by the sudden sound to where the voice had come from and surely enough there was jeno walking towards you
you waved to him and he smiled back
“what are you up t-“ he stopped talking when he saw you watch the moths flutter up into the sky and fly back into the forest
jeno laughed at your pout making you pout more
“who would have thought that the tough slytherin prefect spends her time watching butterflies” jeno teased his hand brushing against yours because of how close he was standing
“they were moths” you corrected
you smiled proudly
for once he wasn’t perfect
“so are you saying you are against the idea of watching butterflies?” he bumped your shoulder playfully
“i haven’t seen many around so i guess it would be nice to see them as well” you sighed truthfully and jeno couldn’t take his eyes off of you
he opened his mouth to speak and that’s when thunder struck
“oh god no please say there’s no-“ before you could finish your sentence it started pouring, “rain”
jeno looked at you and lifted his robe over both of your heads with left arm and grabbed your hand with his right before he started running, pulling you with him towards the castle
you couldn’t help but laugh at how ridiculous this situation was
you were running hand in hand with the boy you hated
with mr.perfect himself
who by the way still looked perfect even when sopping wet with his hair sticking to his face
and that was just offensive
━━ *✭˚・゚✧*・゚*✭˚・゚✧*・゚* *✭˚・゚✧*・゚*✭˚・゚✧*・゚*
jeno didn’t want to let go of your hand even when you had made it back to the castle
so he didn’t
he brought his robe down which happened to be no help anyways
and looked over to see you smiling beside him
how someone could look so perfect while drenched in rain he would never understand
━━ *✭˚・゚✧*・゚*✭˚・゚✧*・゚* *✭˚・゚✧*・゚*✭˚・゚✧*・゚*
jeno walked you back to the slytherin common room
because he was too nice for his own good
his hand was still holding yours
obviously to humiliate you why else
if renjun saw you like this he’d never let it go
you really hoped renjun wasn’t around
but of course he was
you opened the door to the dungeons and there he was
standing right there
he looked at you
then he looked at you hands
then he looked at jeno
back to you
back to your hands
instant wheezing
━━ *✭˚・゚✧*・゚*✭˚・゚✧*・゚* *✭˚・゚✧*・゚*✭˚・゚✧*・゚*
“is your friend okay? i can ask madam pomfrey if she has an inhaler for him” jeno asked the next day
now you were wheezing
━━ *✭˚・゚✧*・゚*✭˚・゚✧*・゚* *✭˚・゚✧*・゚*✭˚・゚✧*・゚*
“amortentia is the most powerful love potion in existence. it causes a powerful infatuation or obsession from the drinker and should not be used under any circumstances” the potions teacher explained at the beginning of the lesson
if it shouldn’t be used then why teach us, you wanted to groan
there was a 500% chance someone was going to try to make someone fall for them like an idiot
the teacher continued on and the curiosity of many students grew “it is said that it smells different to each person, based on what we are attracted to.”
okay maybe that’s kind of cool
and you kind of wanted to know what you were attracted to
well you did know
kind of
“for example i smell cinnamon buns and butterscotch scented candles as well as the ocean” she droned on lazily her eyes closing slightly taking in the scent before she snapped out of it and looked back at the class
“would anyone like to give it a try” the teacher ask and half the hands in the room shot up
including yours
“yn how about you” the teacher said and you got out of your seat to stand in front of the potion
you leaned in to get a waft of the potion and the first thing you smelt was blueberry muffins
“tell everyone what you smell dear” the teacher insists
“umm blueberry muffins, caramel coffee, mint toothpaste, umm-“ you listed getting distracted by the smell
“continue on” the teacher urged smiling
-“the forest, sweat” you said slightly embarrassed “old library books, cats?”
the class laughed at that and you did too
“and umm the rain, should i continue on or-“ you blushed
“no no that’s enough thank you for assisting” the teacher patted you on the back and sent you back to your seat
where believe it or not
renjun was laughing
“what?” you asked curious wondering what you had done now
“i can’t believe you don’t know” renjun took a large breath trying to regain himself “why are you like this?”
“like what?” you were so confused and renjun wasn’t any help
you looked around the room to see if anyone else knew what the fuck was going on and there he was
jeno staring right at you eyes wide
and you had no idea why
━━ *✭˚・゚✧*・゚*✭˚・゚✧*・゚* *✭˚・゚✧*・゚*✭˚・゚✧*・゚*
the next day you watched as jeno grabbed his usual blueberry muffin and coffee before walking over to you and renjun
he had been doing this for about a week
but today
it felt so awkward
like jeno and renjun knew something that you didn’t
and you hated that
but jeno’s perfect soft smile as he handed you his caramel coffee so you could take a sip made all the negativity go away
wait
caramel coffee
blueberry muffin
it had to be a coincidence
yeah that’s all it was
one big coincidence
━━ *✭˚・゚✧*・゚*✭˚・゚✧*・゚* *✭˚・゚✧*・゚*✭˚・゚✧*・゚*
jeno seemed to be bringing you places more often
it was strange
really strange
one day he had dragged you out to the forest with him to feed the animals
which would have been nice if he hadn’t kept looking at you expectedly the whole time
when you didn’t say anything he just sighed and walked away sadly
you hated making mr.perfect sad
the next day jeno took you into the library
where you read about love potions
from old books
and nothing
━━ *✭˚・゚✧*・゚*✭˚・゚✧*・゚* *✭˚・゚✧*・゚*✭˚・゚✧*・゚*
jeno was going insane
he was trying everything
he couldn’t tell if you were purposely doing this or if you were actually this oblivious
he guessed it was the latter because you may be cute but you definitely weren’t an actor
he learned that the hard way
resulting in you both losing 20 house points
he would rather not get into that
━━ *✭˚・゚✧*・゚*✭˚・゚✧*・゚* *✭˚・゚✧*・゚*✭˚・゚✧*・゚*
jeno invited you to his quidditch match
and you couldn’t say no, no matter how much you disliked the sport
because he has asked you with his perfect smile and his perfect pleading eyes
and no one could say no to that
━━ *✭˚・゚✧*・゚*✭˚・゚✧*・゚* *✭˚・゚✧*・゚*✭˚・゚✧*・゚*
he gave you his scarf again and renjun imploded
or maybe that was you
━━ *✭˚・゚✧*・゚*✭˚・゚✧*・゚* *✭˚・゚✧*・゚*✭˚・゚✧*・゚*
after the match which you think he won but you weren’t entirely certain jeno ran up to you pulling you into a tight hug
okay so he probably won
it was against slytherin but you know, who cares about house spirit when mr.perfect wants you to root for him
jeno invited you to come back to the hufflepuff common room with him to celebrate
and no one in their right mind would decline
━━ *✭˚・゚✧*・゚*✭˚・゚✧*・゚* *✭˚・゚✧*・゚*✭˚・゚✧*・゚*
his common room was definitely a lot cozier than yours you thought as you sat on the couch by the fire and pet his cat
pet his CAT
while you waiting for him to get out of the shower
although it should feel awkward being in a unknown place surrounded by unknown people, it didn’t
everyone was so welcoming and friendly
it felt so natural
jeno returned in fresh clothes with slightly damp hair that hung cutely in his face and mint toothpaste in the corner of his mouth
this felt familiar
jeno sat beside you putting his arm along the back of the couch and folding his legs on the seat to look at you
you stuck your hand out reaching towards his face “you have a little- there you go” you said as you wiped the little bit of toothpaste away
━━ *✭˚・゚✧*・゚*✭˚・゚✧*・゚* *✭˚・゚✧*・゚*✭˚・゚✧*・゚*
jeno was pretty sure he died then and there
━━ *✭˚・゚✧*・゚*✭˚・゚✧*・゚* *✭˚・゚✧*・゚*✭˚・゚✧*・゚*
jeno was done, he couldn’t take this anymore, everyday he asked you to go on a walk with him hoping
dreaming
that it would rain and you would maybe realize
he was ready to curse the fucking sky
but god decided to send him a gift instead
and it rained
━━ *✭˚・゚✧*・゚*✭˚・゚✧*・゚* *✭˚・゚✧*・゚*✭˚・゚✧*・゚*
“oh my god” you groaned trying to put your hand over your head to stop the rain from hitting you “i can’t believe this happened again”
━━ *✭˚・゚✧*・゚*✭˚・゚✧*・゚* *✭˚・゚✧*・゚*✭˚・゚✧*・゚*
please realize please realize please realize
“what are you doing? why do you look like you’re praying?”
that was it
jeno grabbed your hand and pulled you into him
“can i kiss you” he asked looking down at your lips
you just nodded
so he did
━━ *✭˚・゚✧*・゚*✭˚・゚✧*・゚* *✭˚・゚✧*・゚*✭˚・゚✧*・゚*
what the fuck
WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK your brain was yelling as you kissed jeno
in the rain you might add
wait
rain
blueberry muffins
coffee
cats
sweat
mint toothpaste
forests
old books
jeno
how had you not realized?
you were attracted to jeno
the potion
everything made sense
“oh my god” you said shocked against his lips he laughed and pulled apart so he could look into your wide eyes
“you- the potion- rain- oh my god” you were rambling and jeno kissing you again, a quick peck this time
“i can’t believe it took you this long to realize” jeno said and you groaned slightly embarrassed ducking your head into his chest to hide your face
“hey, hey, no don’t hide, i want to see you” he teased and pushed you back slightly so you were forced to look up at him
your eyes were locked together until his hand moved to cupped your cheek and he leaned in again
but then there was thunder
“we should um-“ you stepped back mumbling shyly “get out of the rain”
“good idea” jeno agreed looking down at his wet clothes that stuck to his body
this time you grabbed his hand
and you both ran
━━ *✭˚・゚✧*・゚*✭˚・゚✧*・゚* *✭˚・゚✧*・゚*✭˚・゚✧*・゚*
the hufflepuff common room was closer and you didn’t want to leave each others sides, not at the moment
not right now
when THAT had just happened
what jeno had been waiting months for
okay maybe what you were also waiting months for
you had changed into one of jeno’s spare perfect yellow hufflepuff sweaters
the both of you sat in front of the warm fire shivering
jeno had an arm around your shoulder holding you close
and he wouldn’t stop looking at you with a perfect smile
“wow” jeno sighed and you looked at him
“what?” you asked with a small laugh
“i’ve just wanted this for so long”
“yeah”
“yeah me too”
━━ *✭˚・゚✧*・゚*✭˚・゚✧*・゚* *✭˚・゚✧*・゚*✭˚・゚✧*・゚*
he was still perfect
but maybe
just maybe
you didn’t really hate him after all
━━ *✭˚・゚✧*・゚*✭˚・゚✧*・゚* *✭˚・゚✧*・゚*✭˚・゚✧*・゚*
#nct drabbles#nct drabble#nct scenarios#nct hogwarts au#nct fluff#nct imagines#nct fanfic#nct fic#nct au#nct dream drabbles#nct dream drabble#nct dream scenarios#nct dream hogwarts au#nct dream fluff#nct dream imagines#nct dream fanfic#nct dream fic#nct dream au#jeno au#jeno hogwarts au#jeno fic#jeno fanfic#jeno fluff#jeno drabbles#jeno drabble#jeno imagines#jeno scenarios#jeno x reader#drabbles
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Music Worth Making Part 4: The Hollywood Ghost Club
Requested: sort of
Warnings: mentions of death, bad writing
Series Summery: When the reader’s life is ripped away from them, they’re distraught. But with her two best friends and three certain ghosts, maybe the afterlife isn’t so bad after all.
Chapter Summery: The boys learn about Bobby, and drag you along to haunt him. They also drag you along to the Hollywood Ghost Club
Words: 4310
A/N: sorry this took so long, I didn’t write for a few days, and I didn’t expect this chapter to be so long. I think this is the longest fic I’ve ever wrote! please tell me if you catch any mistakes, because once again, i did not edit this. also please tell me (on anon or not!) if there is a trigger warning you want tagged. hope you enjoy! (side note: i did a little research and gentlefolk is in fact the gender neutral term for gentleman)
Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 | Part 5 | Masterlist
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“You’re…… a ghost,” Flynn said, her face morphing from confusion, to surprise, to something that looked like regret.
You nodded glumly.
“So that’s why you weren’t in school today? Because you died?” she shook her head. “I can’t believe this. I- I need a minute.” She ran out of the garage.
Your face fell out of the expression you didn’t realize you had been putting on for Flynn. Taking a deep breath, you sat down on the couch, not knowing what to do.
“Hey, Y/N, I-” Julie stopped when she saw you. “You okay?”
“Huh? Oh, oh yeah, I’m fine,” you lied. You could tell that Julie didn’t believe you, but she didn’t push. You were thankful. You didn’t even know what was off.
“Okay, well, I just wanted you to know that Danny’s staying in Carlos’s room now.”
“Really?” you asked, standing up. “Thank you Jules!” you went to hug the girl, but then remembered you were made of air.
“Yeah, no problem,” Julie said, trying to make what you had accidentally created a bit less awkward. “Well, I gotta go do homework. I guess that’s one perk to being dead, you don’t have to do school anymore.” She laughed a little as she waved goodbye.
That was true. You had a lot more freetime now. Maybe even time to sing?
Looking around to make sure no one was there, you closed your eyes and could practically hear the start of your favorite song. You started singing along, quietly at first, but soon you were belting it out at the top of your lungs and dancing all around the room, passing through the furniture that was in your way.
The song ended, and you smiled, happy for the first time in a while. Before you could continue on to the next song, your moment of bliss was interrupted.
“I didn’t know you could sing,” Luke said from his spot in the doorway. You jumped slightly. You had been so caught up in the music that you didn’t notice him watching you.
“Oh, sorry, I didn’t mean to scare you,” he said, stepping into the studio. “That was really good.”
You felt your face heating up. “Thanks,” you said quietly. It was the first time you had been complimented on your voice, never having the guts to sing anywhere outside of the school choir.
“Do you sing much?” he asked, moving to sit on the couch.
“Um, not really, no.” You sat next to him. “My parent’s wouldn’t let me. I only sang in the ensemble for the school choir.”
“Wow. That was amazing for someone who doesn’t sing much.” You felt yourself blush slightly. He smiled at you.
“Hey, um, would you wanna join the band?” he asked, fidgeting with his rings.
Your eyes widened. “Join- join Julie and the Phantoms? I, I’d be honored to, but what about Alex and Reggie?”
“What about them?”
“Well, shouldn’t they get a say in it? Julie too? I mean, it’s their band, too.”
Luke waved his hand dismissively. “I’m sure once they hear you sing, they’ll agree with me.”
You bit your lip. “Even if I did join, there’s a risk of someone recognizing me. How are you going to explain that the dead kid is singing on stage with Julie?”
“I’m not. Julie would explain that,” Luke smirked, earning a playful glare from you. “Seriously though, you could wear a disguise or something. I mean, you said you just moved here a few years ago and you’re pretty shy, so most people don’t know you, right?”
“Maybe….” You knew that someone was bound to recognize you, but decided that it was a problem for Future You to figure out. “Alright, I’ll join.”
Luke bounced up. “Yessss!” he exclaimed, pumping a fist in the air. You squeaked slightly when he pulled you into a tight hug. “Sorry,” he said, loosening his grip. You smiled at him, letting him know it was fine. “Welcome to the band.”
-----
“We’re playing a school dance? Sweet!” Reggie said, looking at the poster Julie had shown you.
“It’s not exactly the Strip,” Luke muttered, making you roll your eyes slightly.
“And you’re not exactly alive, so you should be happy we have our first gig,” Reggie retorted.
“I wasn’t in love with the idea at first either,” Julie admitted, “but it could be a great way for us to build a following, right?”
“Yeah, we need to play wherever we can, whenever we can,” you said, nodding at Julie.
She raised an eyebrow at you. “We?”
You felt your heart start to speed up as you realized you had accidentally told her you joined the band. Luckily, Luke saved you from having to explain yourself.
“Ye- yeah, we. I invited Y/N to join the band earlier. I hope that was okay,” he said, throwing an arm around your shoulders and hugging you to his side.
Julie nodded hesitantly. “It’s fine, I just wish you had asked us first.” Reggie nodded his agreement.
“I know, and I’m really sorry-” you started, but Julie cut you off.
“It’s fine, Y/N, really.” She smilied at you.
Luke smiled. “Let’s rock those kid’s faces off! And then play the clubs.”
“And then record a single that gets a billion streams?” you said hopefully.
“I don’t know what that is, but hopefully it gets us a manager and a tour,” Luke said with a smirk.
“And then we release a bunch of hit albums!” Julie said excitedly.
“Put out a country album that does surprisingly well.” You all stared at Reggie. “I shred on the banjo,” he shrugged.
“Then I’ll learn how to fiddle,” Julie said, fist bumping him.
“And before you know it, we’re being inducted into the Rock ‘n’ Roll Hall Of Fame!”
“But one of us isn’t there,” you said somewhat ominously. “Because we had a blow-out in 2032.”
“My money’s on Alex. He’s just so sensitive,” Reggie said, making you laugh slightly.
“What are we waiting for, let’s get rehearsing!” Luke said eagerly.
“Uh… where is Alex?” Julie asked just as he poofed back into the room.
“Oh, hey Alex. Where’ve you been?” you asked the drummer. He looked slightly out of breath, and had a faint glow of happiness to him.
“We need to start practicing,” Luke said, slightly annoyed.
“Yeah? For what?”
“Dance news!” Flynn called out as she walked in. “I don’t have a date. But I don’t care because I’m so psyched to see you guys perform.”
“Oh man, we’re playing a dance?” Alex asked, his disappointment evident in his voice.
“Of course dude. That’s how we get a following nowadays.” Luke sat in the chair behind him. You laughed quietly.
“Yeah, get with the program, Alex,” Julie laughed along with you.
“What? The guys are here? Hey guys!” Flynn waved in the wrong direction.
“Other way, sweetie,” you chuckled. “They’re sitting over here, with me.”
“Oh, yeah.” Flynn said quietly and waved in your direction. Reggie waved back.
“Okay, well, now that Alex has graced us with his presence, can we start working?” Luke asked, impatient.
“Yes! We’re gonna rehearse, you wanna stick around?” Julie asked Flynn, who frowned slightly.
“I’m supposed to blow up 500 balloons for the school dance, but this sounds way better.”
Just then, Carlos burst into the studio and accidentally walked through Alex. “Hey Julie! Remember those orbs in dad’s pictures? I…. I think they’re ghosts.”
You, Julie, and the guys all shared a look.
“But don’t worry,” Carlos continued, scanning the room. “This room is…. Is….” You sat forward slightly, waiting to hear his verdict. “This room is clear. I’m not getting the ghost tinglies.”
“Wrong again, little dude,” Reggie laughed.
“Have no fear. If they come back, I will protect you because I am the man of the house.”
You laughed. “Isn’t Ray supposed to be the man of the house?”
“Isn’t dad supposed to be the man of the house?” Julie asked, echoing you. You smirked.
Carlos crossed his arms. “There can be two,” he muttered, causing you to laugh again. “Dad needs all the help he can get, right?”
He held up a salt shaker. “According to the internet, this burns their souls out. A little sprinkle will keep them from ever coming in here.”
Your eyes widened with fear. It couldn’t possibly be true, could it? Taking no chances, you pulled your legs up into the chair you were sitting in as Carlos threw some salt your way.
“No!”Alex screamed as some salt hit him. “Nooo! Oh god, I’m…. I’m fine. I’m totally fine,” he said when nothing happened to him. You sighed in relief.
“Flynn, could you…?” you asked, nodding your head to indicate taking Carlos out of the studio. In times like these it was useful to be a ghost that only some people could see.
“Hey, Carlos, you know who’s hungry? Me,” she said, taking your hint. “Um, salt me a path to the kitchen.”
“Shall we try this again?” Julie asked once they were gone.
“Yes please, but remind us later. There’s some Sunset Curve songs that we wanna show you,” Luke said, standing up again.
“Oooo, show me now,” Julie said, pushing away her microphone.
“Yeah, okay!” Luke said, putting down his guitar and walking over to his journal. He took a paper out of it and read the title of the song: “‘Home Is Where My Horse Is’. Reggie, stop putting your country songs in my journal.”
“That was a gift,” Reggie said, winking at you.
“Thanks, buddy.” Ignoring Reggie as he tried to get Luke to look at the song, he walked over to Julie and handed her his journal. You walked over to look over her shoulder. “I dog-eared the ones I think you would slay.”
“Who’s Emily?” You asked, the name catching your eye as Julie flipped through the pages.
“That one’s not dog-eared,” Luke said, frantically trying to get the journal back. Julie held it to her chest. You mouthed “sorry” at him as he looked at you.
“‘If you could only know that I’d never let you go’,” Julie read out loud. “Wow Luke, I didn’t know you were such a romantic.”
“He’s not,” Alex said, walking over. “That one’s actually about-”
“No one.” Luke cut him off. “Uh, that’s just something that I tried…” Was it your imagination, or did his eyes flicker over to you? “B- but if you go to the next dog-eared page, I got a tune that’s just…. It’s got a killer beat.”
He started playing the song on his guitar. You tilted your head to the side, sure that you had heard the song before.
“So you wanna sample,” Julie spoke up, cutting Luke off. You realized where you had heard it before. It had been one of Rose’s favorite songs.
Luke scoffed. “What do you mean, ‘sample’?”
“Sample someone else’s music,” you chimed in.
“My mom and I used to sing that song at the top of our lungs in the car all the time.”
“It’s a classic Trevor Wilson song.”
Julie nodded, thankful that you knew what she was talking about.
“Nope.” Luke picked up his notebook. “It’s a classic our song.”
“Pure Sunset Curve,” Reggie said with a smile. “I’ve never even heard of Trevor Wilson.”
“Yeah, maybe you’re mixing it up, you know, with another song,” Alex said.
“Julie doesn’t mix up songs,” you said. “Trust me.”
“Yeah, me and his daughter used to be best friends. We used to hang out at their place all the time! I know that song.” You looked at Julie. Having moved to Los Angeles after Julie and Carrie stopped being friends, you forgot sometimes that they used to like each other.
“Here,” she said, pulling out her computer. “I’ll prove it.”
“His first album had a bunch of hits, but none of his later stuff is as good,” you said while Julie searched his name.
The boys gasped as she turned the computer around. You looked at her in confusion.
“That’s Bobby,” Luke said.
“Seriously? I just told you his name is Trevor,” you said, slightly concerned for his memory.
“Okay, so he changed it, alright? That’s definitely Bobby. He was our rhythm guitarist.” Alex spoke up. Reggie stood still, clearly in shock.
Julie scoffed. “Trevor Wilson was in your band?”
“I can’t get over how old he looks…” Reggie finally said.
“Oh, he looks like a substitute teacher,” Alex said in disgust.
You looked at Julie in confusion again. Sure, you had had a few bad substitutes, but you didn’t think it was enough to be an insult.
“Julie… what were his other hits?” Luke asked hesitantly.
“”Get Lost’.”
“Yeah. I wrote that.”
“‘Long Weekend’?”
“Yeah, Luke wrote that one too,” Reggie spoke up. You and Julie looked at him, the surprise evident on her face.
“‘Crooked Teeth’?”
“And that,” Alex said. “It was about Reggie.”
“What?” Reggie exclaimed, shocked and slightly hurt. “I thought that was about you! I don’t like that song anymore.” You held in a laugh.
“Wait… this is freaking me out. Trevor’s songs are kind of big to me,” Julie explained as Luke picked up some darts. “He’s the one who introduced me to rock.”
“Yeah, and Julie introduced me to rock using his music,” you said. You were freaking out a little too. You loved Trevor’s songs, so it was pretty weird to think that the ghosts standing in front of you had actually written them.
“Yeah, Luke introduced you to rock,” Alex scoffed.
“So this whole time, I thought you were connected to my mom. But instead, you’re connected to Carrie’s dad? Out of all the people, it had to be the one girl who had it out for me.”
“All right, well, add it to our list of questions,” you muttered.
“Back when Carrie and I were friends, the three of us used to talk about music all the time.” Julie looked at the guys. “He never mentioned you guys.”
“And that’s unbelievable!” Luke said, throwing another dart at the board. “He can take all the credit and he doesn’t even mention us?” Reggie shook his head slightly.
“And he’s rich,” you said. The boys all looked at you. “He has his own helicopter.”
“With his face on it,” Julie added.
“And he parks it in front of that hotel?” Reggie asked in shock.
“No. He gets to park it in front of his mansion.” You rolled your eyes.
“Mansion?” Reggie’s voice cracked.
“Dude, we live in a garage,” Alex spoke up.
“It’s not about the money, it’s about the music!” Luke said, but it sounded like he was trying to convince himself as much as anyone else.
“It’s a little bit about the money though!”
“A little bit about the money!”
“He could have shared it with our families! Maybe then my parents wouldn’t have had their house turned into a bike shack!”
“What he did is steal our legacy.”
You felt really bad for them. You couldn’t even imagine how it would feel if you had worked that hard on something, and then someone stole it.
Luke turned to Julie. “Where does he live.”
She sighed. “Above the beach in Malibu.
“Let’s go teach him a lesson,” Reggie said. The boy’s face was usually so kind and bouncy, but now it was stone cold.
“Wait, what? Guys! We have to rehearse for our dance! This is our first gig, and Y/N’s first time singing with us!” Julie said frantically, standing up.
Alex glanced at you in confusion, and you remembered you hadn’t told him yet about you joining the band.
Before you could say anything, however, Luke grabbed your hand and poofed out.
-----
“Bobby’s house is ridiculous!” Alex exclaimed as you looked around.
“Have you seen these platinum records?” you asked.
Reggie turned and looked at them. “Platinum?”
Luke was staring at a different set of records. “He recorded ‘My Name Is Luke’...” he muttered. “My name is Luke!”
Just then a man walked in wearing sunglasses and a leather jacket.
“It’s him!” Reggie said.
“Hey, Carrie! I’m gonna meditate!” Bobby called out.
“He wears sunglasses indoors,” Reggie said, disgusted.
“I’m in the den!” Carrie called out.
“Cool!” Bobby called out before going upstairs.
Reggie shook his head. “I can’t stand him!”
“Time for his past to haunt him,” Luke said, a scowl on his features.
He started up the stairs, with Reggie following him and you following a bit more hesitantly.
“Wait!” Alex called out, making you all turn around. “You know, it’s my…. It’s my first time haunting someone. I wanna make it special.”
You looked at him, confusion written on your face. “Okay, Alex,” you said before turning around and continuing up the stairs, Luke and Reggie joining you.
“Yeah, that was weird, okay,” you heard him mutter as he followed you.
You made your way into Bobby’s room, where he sat with candles lit.
“Agh!” you said as you felt another jolt of pain flair through your ankle. The boys looked at you, concerned. You shook your head to let them know you were fine. It was the weirdest thing, it’s like it flared up when it was the most inconvenient….
You watched the boys giggle as Luke gave Bobby a wet willy.
You and Alex snuck over to the candles, forgetting for a moment that no one could see you, and blew them out.
Reggie turned on the music player, which started playing a rock song. Bobby walked over and turned it off, but Reggie just turned it back on, causing Bobby to unplug it.
You hadn’t noticed Luke sneaking away, but he was gone when the shower turned on a moment later.
“Carrie?” Bobby asked. You giggled with the boys.
Bobby walked into the bathroom to see the shower running just as Luke turned it off. The mirror across from the shower was now foggy, and perfect for a ghost to write on.
“Ooo, Luke, you should write ‘Hello, Bobby’ on it!” you suggested through a fit of giggles. Reggie pointed at you to show his agreement.
Grinning, Luke wrote on the mirror in his best creepy handwriting, which also happened to be his best handwriting.
Bobby tried to run out of the bathroom, but Alex held the door shut.
“Let… Me…. Out!!” he shouted. Alex finally let go of the door and Bobby practically fell out of the room, causing all of you to laugh.
Luke grabbed your hand again and you poofed down to the patio just as Bobby was leaving. You watched as his helicopter flew over your heads.
“Oh! Quick, let’s moon him before he gets too far away,” Reggie said, causing you to roll your eyes.
“He can’t see us,” you reminded them.
“Oh it’s not for him, it’s for us,” Luke said as he pulled down his pants. You averted your eyes.
“So, did you guys have fun in there?” Julie asked, storming outside.
“Okay, you’d do the exact same if he stole all of your songs,” Luke defended them.
“But you guys have new songs. With me. The best way to get back at Trevor is for this band to do great. And to do great, we have to play at dances, then clubs-”
“And tours, I know.” Luke walked up to her. Julie still looked mad.
“I’ll see you guys at the school. We go on at nine. Please don’t be late. There’s gonna be a lot of people there.”
“We got it, alright? Don’t worry,” Alex said.
Julie sighed as she headed back inside.
“I don’t care what Julie says! I’m glad we scared Bobby,” Reggie said with a small grin. “We should’ve done more! Like… like written ‘thief’ on his forehead.”
“And Alex, how did you shut the door earlier? You could barely open a garage door,” you asked, confused.
Reggie looked at his friend, proud of him. “Learned that from your new friend Willie, didn’t ya?”
Alex blushed slightly. “Yeah, well, he taught me some things, we screamed in a museum…” he caught the look of confusion on your face. “It’s a long story.”
Luke smirked. “You think he has a few other tricks up his sleeve?”
“Let’s find out,” Alex said with a shrug.
-----
You landed near a beach, a boy on a skateboard coming to a stop in front of you.
“Hey, what’s up man?” he said to Alex, doing a short handshake. “You brought friends.”
“Yeah, these are my bandmates, Luke, Reggie, and Y/N.”
“Cool, I’m Willie. So, you guys here to learn some tricks?” He waved his hand in the direction of two police fourwheelers, making their sirens go off.
Reggie’s mouth hung open. “Do it again!”
“Actually, we were thinking a little bigger,” Luke said. “An old bandmate stole from us and we wanna confront him, face to face.”
“Alright, is this, uh, friend of yours a lifer?” Willie asked.
“Oh, that’s fancy ghost lingo for the living,” Alex said before you could ask. “Little something I picked up.”
You caught Willie smiling at Alex.
“Ah! Then yeah, he’s a lifer,” Reggie said, using the fancy ghost lingo he had just been taught. “Too much of a fancy-pants for street dogs.”
You snorted. “Wait, that’s how you guys died?” Julie had never told you, and you had just never discussed it with them.
“Uh, that’s not important-” Luke started to say, but Willie cut him off.
“Wait, you didn’t die with them?”
“Uh, no,” you said, trying to stop laughing. “Some guy killed me.”
Willie winced. “Ouch.” You nodded.
“Anyways,” Luke said, trying to get the conversation back on track. “Can you help us?”
“Yeah, I’m sorry,” Willie said, shaking his head. “Speaking to lifers is even out of my lead.” The guy’s faces fell. “You know, but there is one ghost who might be able to help you guys. He’s kind of a big deal…”
“Literally, anything would help,” Luke said.
“Oh, alright. Well, um, I gotta take care of some things, but I’ll meet you where Alex and I met, eight o’clock. See ya.” He skated away.
-----
“Right this way,” Willie said, leading you into a huge ballroom-type room.
“Whoa,” Luke muttered. “So this is where your hot-shot ghost lives, huh?”
“Yeah, we’ve walked past this hotel like, a million times. How come we’ve never heard of it?”Alex asked.
“That’s because this area has been sealed off for decades,” Willie said with a grin. “I mean, you wouldn’t even know this place exists unless you’re invited. Alright, I gotta go make sure everything’s cool, but I’ll be right back.” He turned and disappeared into the crowd.
You inhaled sharply as the pain in your ankle flared up again. Luke looked over at you, confused, and you pointed to your ankle. He nodded, understanding.
“‘The Hollywood Ghost Club’?” Reggie asked, oblivious to what had just happened between you and Luke. “Man, this place is creepy.”
“Yeah, well, so are we.” Alex smiled.
“I don’t know about this,” you muttered.
“Well, if you get scared, you can always hide behind me,” Alex said. “I’ll be hiding behind Luke.”
“You guys need to grow up, okay?” Luke said as Alex moved behind him. “We’re gonna get back at Bobby. He needs to pay for what he did to us.”
“Yeah.” Alex said. Then he whispered to you: “I’m still gonna hide behind him.”
Just then, Willie came back. “We’re all good!” he said with a smile.
“Oh, uh, cool,” Alex said, flustered. “Hey, just so you know, we have like, an hour. We’ve got a gig with Julie.”
“Oh yeah, no worries.”
“Cool.”
“Let’s go.”
You all walked down the stairs, taking in all the fancy clothing people were wearing. Well, the four of you walked. Willie slid down the railing.
“I think we’re a little overdressed,” Luke said. You smirked.
Suddenly a woman walked through Alex.
“Whoa! I thought these people were all going to be ghosts,” Reggie said.
“Nope. These are all lifers.” Willie gestured to the entirety of the club.
“Oh, uh, lifers are actually-”
“Alive people, I was listening,” Reggie said, cutting off Alex with a smirk.
“But this is a very exclusive crowd. Everybody here has uh, paid a lot to get a sneak peak at the afterlife.”
“I always knew rich people did weird stuff like this,” Reggie muttered, making you laugh.
A ghost appeared behind you.
“Gentleman, my lady,” he stopped and looked at you a moment. “I have a table for you.” Your heart sank as he misgendered you, but you didn’t correct him.
“Oh, uh, Y/N here is actually non-binary,” Luke said. You beamed at him.
“My apologies, gentlefolk. Right this way.”
You followed him to a reserved table in the front, right in front of the stage.
Luke pulled out a chair for you to sit. You blushed. You also squealed internally when you noticed Willie do the same for Alex.
“Okay, so who’s gonna make us visible so we can confront our old bandmate?” Luke asked Willie once everyone was seated. You looked around in wonder at the club.
“Oh, no, no. None of these lifers have the power to do that.” Dramatic music started to play out of nowhere. You thought you recognized the melody, although you couldn’t quite place it. “Oh, but here comes the ghost who does!”
“Ladies and gentleman,” boomed a voice from nowhere and everywhere at the same time, “back from the dead by popular demand, Caleb Covington!”
Willie cheered along with the rest of the club’s members as a man appeared floating above the stage.
“Did you miss me?” he asked.
You gasped, your eyes widening.
“What?” Luke asked you. “What’s wrong?”
You turned to him with fear in your eyes. “That’s him.”
“Who?”
“The man who killed me.”
tag list: @sunsetcurvej @ifilwtmfc @xplrreylo @phantompogues @caitsymichelle13 @yagorlemmalyn
#jatp#jatpfic#jatp fic#julie and the phantoms#julie and the phantoms fic#fanfiction#luke x reader#luke patterson x reader#x reader#jatp x reader#julie and the phantoms x reader#rhys writes sometimes#music worth making series
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A Man of Letters - Chapter Seven
Pairing: Dean Winchester x Female Reader Summary: It started as a simple hunt for Sam and Dean Winchester. Dean didn’t realize that this single case would change his life forever. Now they are on the biggest mission of their lives, and without the use of cellphones, the only way he can communicate with the love of his life is through old fashioned letter writing. He has done everything in his power to keep her safe, but will it be enough? Word Count: 6931 ish
Series Warnings: Language, slow burn, angst, smut, alcohol consumption, fluff, SPN typical violence (individual chapters will contain relevant warnings) a little meta Chapter Warning: humor (Is that really a warning?) and a little bit of sweet.(Always), angst, spicy (smut), unprotected (ish) sex
A/N: I want to thank everyone who has read so far, thank you for sticking with me! All of the comments and reblogs mean so very much! THANK YOU!
Thank you to my beta’s @winchest09 and @whatareyousearchingfordean without them I would be sunk!
MASTERLIST A Man of Letters
If you’d like to be tagged, my list is open. Just send me an ask HERE: **Make sure you check out the playlist, it is updated every chapter and an essential part of the story**
Spotify Playlist : A Man of Letters
Catch up here >>>>>>> A Man of Letters Masterlist
This series is ongoing!
No Gif’s are mine
Dean “Tongue Magician” Winchester PO Box 323 Sioux Falls, SD 57101
Dear D,
You were right, I got both letters the same day. It was a really nice surprise. I hope that “Sam” likes the brownies. I’m sure they are stale, but I made enough for everyone, so please share them because I know they are for you. Sam literally eats one brownie when I make them. Work has picked up, and my schedule is full most days. I’m happy to be busy when you are gone, it makes the days go by faster, but my bed is too big and empty without you. I’ve slept on the couch a few times since you’ve been gone, I just leave the pillows on, and I can almost convince myself you are here.
I was thinking about the couch night, but now you have me thinking about the bed night, and damn, you are too far away to dwell on that for too long! Also, do not talk to me about me moaning your name in letters because I swear to God I will write you a note that you will have you locking yourself in Baby to read!
Things are pretty quiet here as usual. I went to the farmers market today and bought vegetables. I’m trying to figure out some new recipes to try. I know you said that you were up for anything, just no more butter beans because they taste like mud (which, for the record, they do not!), so we will see what I can do. I saw Mark from the garage there, and he told me to tell you “Hello” and that he is almost finished with the body of the 1971 Plymouth Hemi Cuda. He wondered when you would be back because he could use your help with the new paint job. I told him that the job you had was going to last longer than most but that I’m sure as soon as you got into town that you would help him.
D, I know we talked about the future before, but are you sure you want to walk away? I’m here no matter what, I’m not going anywhere. You need to be sure this is what you want to do for you. With that being said, I am selfish enough to say I want nothing more than to fall asleep in your arms every night and to wake up next to you each morning. I’m glad you wrote it in a letter because I can read it over and over. Sometimes, when you are gone, I just start questioning things and can be a bit insecure about all of it, but you knew that already.
I guess I should wrap this up, I’m sorry you guys are doing more research, but, as always it will pay off in the end. I’m not surprised you set up training for everyone, that is definitely your thing, and it gives you an excuse not to read those dusty books. You guys be safe and come back soon. I miss your face.
I Love You, Your Initial
3 Years Ago
They were a little over halfway back to the bunker, driving through Hastings, Nebraska, and Sam started to worry. Dean had not spoken 5 words this entire trip. He didn’t even want snacks when they stopped for gas. They have been driving for almost two hours, the radio on low, the only thing consistent is the tapping of his thumb on the top of the steering wheel, lost in his own thoughts.
“Dean.” He broke the silence
“Huh?” pulling himself from his thoughts, glancing at Sam.
“You want to tell me what’s going on?”
“What? Nothing,” raising his eyebrows, he shook his head briefly.
Flicking his eyes to the backseat, Sam confirmed the vamp was still out cold. “Ok, I’ll start. I know that you knew where these vamps were hiding out long before I told you. Instead of helping me, you continued to point me in the wrong direction.”
He rubbed his hand down his face with equal amounts of irritation and embarrassment. “Sammy, it’s not like that I-,”
Annoyed Sam cut him off, “Dude, it is exactly like that, but the funny part is I’m not even mad anymore.”
“Fine, you know I don’t want to talk about this, but you get one question and one answer and don’t get all chick flick about it either because that’s not happening.”
“Great,” Sam smirked, “What’s Y/N’s favorite color?”
Without missing a beat, Dean answered, “It’s a tie between navy blue and dark grey.”
Sam threw his head back with a laugh. Dean’s mouth quirked up in a half-smile, turning up the radio as “Ramblin’ Man” by The Allman Brothers blared through the speakers. Laying his foot on the gas pedal, a little heavier to get back to the bunker to get answers from the comatose vamp tied up in the back seat.
Dean and Sam had left Y/N’s house 2 days ago. The first 24 hours she didn’t go anywhere without her phone, that got old quickly. She began to feel like it was a leash; finally, she went about her day and left it plugged in on her nightstand. Today was Saturday, she didn’t have any clients this morning; instead, it was all the things to catch up from the week. Mowing the lawn, cleaning the house, grocery shopping, stripping the sheets, and doing laundry.
She put her hair in a messy bun, threw on her Neil Diamond t-shirt with denim shorts, grabbed her BlueTooth headphones, linking them to her tablet, and set it outside on the deck and connected it to her playlist. Greta Van Fleet’s “Highway Tune” burst into her ears as she yanked the pulley to start the lawnmower. She chuckled to herself as she began to mow the backyard. Dean had mentioned a few times that he wanted to do it, but that was not going to happen. She had put them both out enough, and besides, it was a good exercise for her. Finishing up in a little over an hour, she put away the lawn equipment, grabbed a bottle of water from the “beer fridge” in the garage, and jumped in the Jeep. She wanted to head to two destinations, the grocery store and the gardening store to buy more plants and flowers. Working in the yard kept her hands and mind busy, and right now, that is precisely what she needed.
As she was perusing the freezer section for her favorite Ben & Jerry’s flavor, she ran into her friend Jennifer. They had met just a few weeks after Y/N moved to Lincoln and they had become fast friends. After a brief hug, they agreed to meet later on that evening for drinks on Y/N’s back deck to catch up. She stopped and bought some more daisies and headed back home, looking forward to spending the evening with her friend.
After planting the flowers, she ran in the house to quickly shower and wash her hair, scrubbing off the dirt and grime of the day. Finishing up, she wrapped her hair in a towel and dried off when she noticed Dean’s black flannel hanging on the door hook. He’d accidentally left it behind the last time he was here. Walking over, she brushed her fingers lightly over the material and as she brought it closer to her nose, she could still smell his woodsy maleness clinging to the fabric. She rested her head against the door, thinking about how much she missed him already and realizing how ridiculous it sounded.
With a sigh, she left the bathroom walking down the hall to her bedroom, pausing she looked at her phone lying face down on the nightstand. She was torn; part of her wanted to see if Dean had called or texted, but an overwhelming part did not want to be disappointed when he didn’t. She made a deal with herself, she would get dressed and dry her hair, and THEN she would look at it. Y/N did silly bargaining things like this with herself all the time, almost like bargaining with the Gods to turn the odds in her favor. She pulled on a pair of grey shorts and a and white Garth Brooks shirt, chuckling to herself, thinking of when Dean accused her of having more band shirts than he did.
Sitting in front of her mirror with her flat paddle brush, she began drying her hair in pieces, after finishing she put on a bit of mascara, eyeliner, and colored lip balm. Smiling at herself in the mirror, she was pleased with the results, standing with a huff, Y/N went to check her phone. Picking it up, she expected nothing. However, she slowly lowered herself to the bed as her screen lit up, her eyes growing wider with every missed notification.
Dean 3 Missed calls
Dean: Hey, Babe, been crazy with you know what. Just wanted to hear your voice.
Dean 4 Missed calls
Sam 1 Missed call
Dean: Y/N. Is everything ok? Call me when you get this.
Dean 2 Missed calls Sam: Tink, would you PLEASE call Dean? I might kill him soon if you don’t. Jennifer 1 Missed Call Dean: ok, I’m trying to keep my shit together right now, I’m FUCKING WORRIED. I’m just telling you right now if I don’t hear back from you in 2 hours I’m driving back.
Just then, her phone lit up in her hand, Dean’s face popping up, the ring scaring her so bad she dropped the phone. She scrambled to pick it up, pushing the speaker button quickly. “Hello?”
“Y/N?” Dean’s voice boomed through the speaker.
“Hey Dean, I’m so sorry-” she began.
Dean cut her off, “Are you good? Jesus Fuck, I was like a crazy person down here. You’re good, right? I mean you are answering the phone, so you’re alright. Right?” She could hear a slamming car door in the background.
“Dean!” she raised her voice to get his attention, “I’m fine I just left my phone plugged in all day, and I was busy.”
“Shit, right.” She could hear him running his hand over his scruff, “I’m sorry Babe, I know, I sound like a lunatic. We just haven’t been able to get anything out of this vamp, when you didn’t answer, my mind just started going to a dark place.”
“I promise, I’m really fine,” she soothed, “I mowed the lawn and went to the grocery and bought some flowers; just busy. I even saw my friend Jennifer today. She’s coming over tonight, and we are going to sit on the deck and have a couple beers.”
“Honestly, that sounds great Y/N/N, I just wanted to hear your voice and tell you to be careful. We don’t know who sent those vamps yet, and until we do, you just need to watch your back.”
She didn’t want to roll her eyes, but she couldn’t help it. There were only so many ways she could reassure him, she didn’t want Dean to worry about her, Y/N just living her life, maybe she was naïve. Hell, no one has worried about her since her parents’ death. It was a strange feeling.
“Dean,” she began, “What can I do to make you feel better?”
She could almost hear the sheepish shrug in his voice “I don’t know” pulling himself out of that quickly, his voice became stronger. “Could you just carry your damn phone with you?”
Dean heard the laughter through his phone, and he couldn’t help but smile, hearing her laugh warmed his insides. “Of course, I will! I do have a question for you, though.”
“Shoot.”
“Were you really going to drive back up here if I didn’t answer?” The silence on the phone went on for so long that she had to double-check to be sure they weren’t disconnected. “Dean?”
“Yeah,” came a gruff reply, “I was in the garage when I thought I would call you one more time before I left.”
“Oh Dean, I’m sorry.” Guilt niggled at her as she thought of him dropping his plans.
“Y/N, maybe I overreacted a little, but I’m so far away that, if shit went down, It would take me 2 ½ hours to get there.”
“I’m just living, Dean, but I will be careful, I swear. I don’t want you to worry about me. You have enough to worry about without adding me to it.”
Oh, Babe,” he chuckled, “It’s a little late for that, don’t you think?”
“Maybe.” He could hear the smile in her voice.
“So, I thought I would come back up on Thursday night if that’s ok.”
“More than,” she replied with a soft smile, “I miss you.”
“Same,” he replied gruffly, “see you Thursday, then.”
“Bye, Dean,” she whispered. She pushed the end button and flopped back on the bed, heart pounding in her chest.
She missed him, but the idea of him coming back had her stomach in knots. There was no doubt in her mind that she was going to have sex with him when he came back. She could barely keep herself in check before he left. It had been a long time since she had been intimate with anyone, what if she forgot how? She had been fine just shoving her sexual frustrations to the bottom of her priority list, life got its hooks in her, she was more interested in getting her business off the ground, fixing up her house and making a life for herself. He was the first person in recent memory who made her look twice. Now he was coming to stay with her. This time she knew that the couch was not going to cut it.
Dean’s POV
Bracing his forearms on the driver’s side window frame of Baby, he tossed the phone on her roof with a sigh. It’s taking all of his internal strength not to jump in the car right now and head back to Lincoln. In his mind, he knows that she is safe, but his chest still ached. This is why he didn’t involve himself in this type of bullshit. Sticking to the random hook up fitted his life. What the hell was he thinking, dragging her deeper into a life that she has no business being within a 1000 feet of? She is too sweet to get involved in his shit show of life. He was tossed into it the day his mother was roasted on the ceiling. Y/N deserves so much better than he could ever offer. If he had a brain cell left in his head, he would man up and text her right now to tell her to forget it, he wasn’t returning to Lincoln. He and Sam would track down whoever was after her and take care of it. Y/N could move on with her life and forget all about him and the nightmare life he leads. Exhaling loudly, Dean grabs his phone, shoving it in his pocket and pushing himself off the car, the adrenaline of his fear and anger still pumping through his veins. He knows she deserves better than a text. When he drives up on Thursday, he will tell her that it’s best for her.
Eventually, the stabbing pain in his chest will go away and if it doesn’t, maybe this is just what it would be like now that he really knows what he will be missing when he walks away.
Jennifer and Y/N embrace at the door when she arrives promptly at 7:00. It was an evening of a few too many beers and laughs. Jennifer switched to Diet Coke after two. Although she was a little more than tipsy, she was careful to keep most of the secrets when Jennifer started to question her about the black muscle car parked at her house when Y/N was MIA for a few weeks, no one knew she was hiding a bruised and swollen face.
Travis had kept his mouth shut as promised. Sam and Dean stopped in to talk to him about the “guys” who followed Y/N home and assaulted her. He wanted his bar as far away from that controversy as possible.
They ended the evening with more hugs and promises to get together again soon, Y/N made her way to her bedroom, phone in hand, drunkenly stripping off clothes all the way down the hall. Climbing under the sheets, she started to plug in her phone but changed her mind.
Dean’s phone buzzed with a text message at 1:17 a.m, he was sitting in the library nursing his third whiskey of the night. Picking up his phone, he thumbed it open to see it was a text from Y/N. As he opened the message, his mouth slowly began to gape open. Staring back at him was a selfie. Y/N was laying down, her hair fanning around her on the pillow, a sweet smile playing on her lips. He could see the curve of her breasts, turning the phone back and forth he was sure he could have seen her nipple. She was totally naked in that massive bed without him. The simple text accompanying the picture is what truly did him in.
Babe: Wish you were here
“FUCK!” he groaned loudly, closing his eyes, throwing his head back
Thursday came in a blink of an eye for both of them. Dean had texted Y/N to let him know he would be leaving around noon. It was 10:00 a.m. now, his anxiousness already kicked into high gear. Sam walked into the war room, a mug of coffee in his hand, still in his blue and black plaid pajama pants with a grey long sleeved T-Shirt. His hair pointing in every direction, bare feet smacking against the tile floor. He stopped abruptly when he spotted Dean pacing a path back and forth. He was already dressed in jeans and boots topped with a dark grey T-shirt underneath a burgundy and grey flannel. An empty coffee cup sitting on the map table along with his duffle bag.
“Dean?” he questioned.
“Yeah?” he responded, continuing to pace.
“What’s the deal? What are you doing?” He fully entered the room, placing his mug on the table studying Dean.
“I’m thinking! What are you doing? I just got shit on my mind,” he barked back, continuing to pace, stopping to look at his phone, before beginning his walk again.
“Aren’t you going to Y/N’s today?” Sam questioned, “I thought you would be happy. Instead, you’re stalking around here like an angry bear.”
Dean’s angry gaze snapped to Sam, confirming his characterization. “I’m coming back tonight.” Sam paused in the middle of sitting, standing back up, “Dude, WHAT?”
Running his hand roughly over his face, he sighed. “I got some space; after the other day, when I couldn’t reach her, it made me realize she doesn’t need to be dragged into this life. It’s too much.”
“And there it is” Sam threw his hands in the air, frustration written all over his face.
“What’s that supposed to mean?” Dean growled.
“Every.Fucking.Time,” he emphasized each word pointing his finger at the older Winchester. "Whenever you find a little bit of happiness, you start sabotaging yourself, it’s always something. This life sucks, you’re too busy, it’s the apocalypse, someone or something needs you more, you just shut down and tell yourself it’s not worth the trouble.”
Dean just stared at his brother as he continued to ramble.
“Just once Dean, just one time can you put yourself first?” he gestured toward him. “Yes, I know Y/N was a case and you are pissed off that the vamp won’t talk, you’re worried that your life is going to splash on her. She is stronger than you think, you think you need to pile all of this on your shoulders, you don’t. I have never seen you, my own brother, let his guard down around someone before.”
“She’s too good Sammy, she doesn’t deserve-”
“What?” Sam questioned, gathering momentum again “She doesn’t deserve to be happy? She doesn’t deserve to have someone care about her? You-” he pointed at him once more, “are both crazy about each other. I could see it on your faces every time I was in the same room with you both. You have earned the right to be happy.”
Dean crossed his arms contemplating Sam.
“Just do me a favor, would you?” Go up there and just see her, stay the three days, like you planned, see what happens. Promise me you won’t go up there halfcocked trying to tell her, like you always do to everyone, that you know what’s best. Leave your bullshit baggage here and just go see her.”
“Whatever,” Dean grumbled, hiking his bag on his shoulder as he picked his keys off the table, striding towards the garage, “I think you need to mind your own damn business.”
“When has that ever happened before?” Sam called after him.
As Dean began to drive to Lincoln, Y/N was running around nerves and excitement, twisting her gut. She had showered, shaved everywhere, lotioned up, fixed her hair, letting it flow down her back instead of the ponytail or messy bun look and she had applied light makeup. Looking down at her bed, almost every article of clothing she owned was spread out. Y/N picked up all of her dresses and hung them back in the closet. If she wore a dress, he would know that she was trying too hard.
“This is ridiculous!” she thought to herself as she started shoving clothes back into drawers. She settled on a pair of denim cutoff shorts and a sleeveless black and white blouse that cut in at the shoulders and tied at the back of her neck, flowing to mid-hip. Picking up the remainder of clothes strewn about, she muscled them back in her closet, slamming the door. She checked herself out in the mirror, happy with the tan legs and arms on display. Walking out into the living room, she started to feel fidgety. She had serious thoughts about going to work in the garden, but she would have to shower all over again. After wandering around the house, she checked her phone at 1:00. She had two hours left. Flopping on the couch, she flipped on the television and began channel surfing, trying to zone out.
As Dean sped up the highway to Y/N’s house, the conversation with Sam this morning was a consistent loop in his head. Actually, it was more of a Sam tirade. Dean knew what was best, right? Nip it in the bud before one of them could get hurt. She really wasn’t what he needed in his life, he told himself. Unattached works best for him. An after bar closing fling to get rid of the itch, then back to living life. No expectations, no texts, no I’ll-call-you-laters. But if that is what he wanted, then why did it make him sad and angry all at once?
Twenty minutes outside of Lincoln, he stopped for gas, seriously considering calling her to say he couldn’t make it. Sure, she might be disappointed, but she would get over it, wouldn’t she? No, he chastised himself, he would do the right thing and tell her face to face. He owed her that, at the very least. Looking at his watch, he realized that he had made a good time between leaving the bunker early so Sam would quit bitching at him and no traffic or cops on the 2 lane highway. He would be at her house at 1:30. Jumping back in Baby, he cranked the ignition “The Real Love” by Bob Seger blared through the speakers, it was a slow one, he reached down to flip the channel but paused but as the lyrics began to speak to him.
I think I’ve found The Real Love Genuine and true I think it’s really come my way today Babe I think it’s really you
I remember moments looking in your eyes Could have sworn I saw the spark of love babe Flickering inside
I’ve been around this track And the only thing I lack Is The Real Love
Placing his hand back on the wheel, his knuckles turned white as he squeezed, the pressure in his chest overwhelming him as he blinked back tears. His mind and heart screaming, “Don’t do this!!” Angrily, he threw Baby in drive, grinding his teeth together and snapping his jaw. He jammed his foot on the gas, leaving tire treads next to the pumps. The Impala fishtailing as he exited to the street heading towards Y/N house. The pain crashing through him as the verses washed over him.
Every time I see you, every time we touch I can feel the way you feel for me Babe And it means so much
And every time you look at me It’s just the way it all should be In The Real Love
Oh darlin’ darlin’ darlin’ Stay with me stay I long to see you in the morning sun Everyday Everyday
So until that moment When I take your hand I’m gonna try to do my very best Babe To prove that I’m your man
I’m gonna do my very best I’m not gonna rest Until we’ve got The Real Love
He was in agony, convincing himself it was what he deserved thinking about what he was about to do.
Hearing the deep rumble of Baby, Y/N sat up on the couch, flinging the remote on the coffee table. Her heart began thundering in her chest as she looked at the clock 1:28 p.m. “It’s too early, it can’t be him. He said 3:00” she thought. Her feet had a mind of their own, carrying her, almost unwilling, afraid to be disappointed that it was another car, but she knew. She would recognize the sound of his car anywhere. The screen door opened with a squeak as she stepped on the porch as Dean drove up the driveway. She shoved her hands in her front pockets to appear calm, but she could not wipe the huge grin off her face nor the heat burning her cheeks.
Dean turned off Baby and sat there for a moment, squeezing the steering wheel, flexing his jaw as he tried to get his bearings together. He knew what had to be done, he couldn’t draw it out. “Just cut to the chase, short and sweet. Get it over and done with and let her live in peace,” he told himself, until he glanced out the window and saw her on the porch.
The ice that he tried to form around his heart cracked wide as he looked at her beautiful, smiling face. Never in his life could he recall someone so thrilled to see him. She was pure sunshine that spread light through him as he looked at her. Pulling the metal handle, he got out of the car, slamming the heavy door behind him. Her hands were in her pockets, but she was so happy she was almost vibrating. As he walked towards her, all he could hear was Sam’s voice yelling in his head, “leave your bullshit baggage here! You have earned the right to be happy!”
Each step that he took melted the ice a little more, stopping in the grass, he matched her smile and opened his arms. She was off the porch running to him. She jumped into his arms and wrapped her legs around his waist as he locked her in his embrace. She buried her face in his neck as he nuzzled her hair, breathing her in.
“You know,” she whispered, smiling into his neck, “when I thought about today, I always imagined I would have been much cooler.”
Chuckling, he pressed a kiss against her temple, “I wouldn’t have wanted it any other way.” The truth is, had she been calm, cool, and collected, Dean would not have questioned his stupidity until he was headed back to the bunker. By that time, it would have been too late, and he would have had to live with his decision no matter what the ache in his chest told him.
Setting her on her feet, bending, he pressed a firm kiss on her lips, lingering as the last bits of ice melted around his heart. He wanted to tell her what he had driven up here to do; he just couldn’t yet. What if he scared her? What if she stopped looking at him with unconditional acceptance? After everything he had shared with her, the killings, the monsters, and the Mark of Cain, she rolled with it all as if he was telling her how he changed the oil in Baby. She was interested and asked questions but never judged him. Telling her most of his secrets on the couch was never what he meant to do, but she pulled it out without even trying. What if telling her he was going to look at him differently? He couldn’t handle that, his chest hurt to even think that. What if it broke what has been so carefully built. What if it broke her? He couldn’t do that. The thought that he was actually going to come up here and tell her it was over made him feel lightheaded.
Pulling back, she took his hand in hers with a smile. “I hope you’re hungry tonight. I made steak, twice baked potato, corn on the cob and...” she drawled, wiggling her eyebrows, “pecan pie.”
“Wow,” he chuckled “you didn’t have to do all of that.”
She lifted one shoulder, slightly embarrassed, “I wanted to.”
Squeezing her hand, he murmured, “thank you.”
Smiling bright at him, she opened the screen door, Y/N entering and pulling Dean with her. The house smelled like pie. He didn’t realize how much he missed being with her in her space until he walked in the door. The smell, the feeling of hominess solidified his decision to listen to Sam’s advice. Maybe his little brother knew something, after all.
Dean grabbed two bottles of beer out of the refrigerator, walking out on the back deck. Just being close to her, he could feel a weight lifting off him as he comfortably settled back into their little routine. He would always twist off the bottle top for her and hand her the beer. Even if she brought the beers out, she gave them both to him. When both bottles were open, they would clink the bottlenecks together before their first drink. It was the little things like this that made him ridiculously happy.
Sitting on the deck, they shared different things from the week, there were no awkward moments or pause in the conversation. It just flowed as it did on the couch. Dean tried to keep it light, telling funny stories about Sam as Y/N’s laughter rang out, filling him with a warmth he never knew he needed., She would reach out and touch him, brushing her fingers against his knee or grasping his arm when she was making a point. He looked forward to each touch, desire shuttering through him every time. As the afternoon slid into the evening, Dean would graze her upper arm with a smile, just to see her shiver. He felt powerful that it was his touch doing that to her.
Time flew by as the cold beers went down smoothly. Soon it was time to light the grill and cook up the steaks as she put together the side dishes. They decided to eat at the pub table on the deck, lighting the lanterns as the sun began to set and soft music played through the hidden speakers. Y/N watched Dean eat dinner as she moved the food around her plate. She watched him as they talked through dinner, either he wasn’t nervous or could chew through anything. She was hungry but only took a few bites here and there. The later it got, she began to get keyed up. She felt like she knew how the evening would end; however, her insecurities made her start to question everything. After dinner, they loaded the dishwasher and made coffee for both of them. It was very domestic, like all the pieces were snapping into place. Dean sat down his mug as the crisp sound of an acoustic guitar wafted through the sound system. “Give Me One Reason” by Tracy Chapman. The notes carried into the darkness as the deck was illuminated by the hanging lanterns.
Reaching out his hand he beckoned to Y/N, “dance with me.”
With a shy smile, she accepted his hand as he led her to the middle of the deck and took her in his arms. Her heart began to double-time in her chest as she looked into Dean’s eyes and saw the heat reflected back down on her. He pulled her close as they moved through the song and she could not help but to be struck by the lyrics.
Give me one reason to stay here And I'll turn right back around Give me one reason to stay here And I'll turn right back around Said I don't want leave you lonely You got to make me change my mind
Ducking his head to brush his lips to hers, the sizzle that has built between them all night, ignites. He wants this woman more than he has ever wanted anyone in his life. In a rush of uncontrollable desire, Dean cups Y/N’s face and pulls her to him, crashing his lips greedily to hers. The first touch of his mouth on hers and she threw her arms around him, pressing her body against his. The intense desire exploded between them; the compelling need to claim her, lick her, have her, drove him to the brink of insanity. He opened her lips with his, his tongue sliding into her mouth, bringing out a throaty moan that almost pushed him over the edge. He glided his hand down her back, cupping one of her round cheeks with his palm as he roughly pulled her against his erection; she gasped with pleasure as she began to grind herself onto him, her own arousal dictating her actions.
Picking her up, she wrapped her legs around him as he walked them into the house, down the hall into the bedroom, their mouths only moving apart to gasp for air before devouring each other once more. The dance of their tongues did nothing to quench her thirst for him since they had initially started, and she found herself rubbing against him in an attempt to ease her aching core. Setting her down on her feet in front of the bed, she looked up to see Dean’s eyes had changed to a dark smoldering green; the lust reflected back to her, making her tremble with yearning.
“I need you so much,” he rasped.
“God, me too,” she whimpered.
A smile spread across his face as he hooked his index finger along the waistband of her shorts, dragging them down her tan legs to her ankles. On his knees in front of her, he placed a soft kiss on her belly button, his tongue flicking her hoop piercing.
“So fucking hot,” he murmurs as her skin erupts in goosebumps, a shiver of excitement moving up her spine as she runs her hands through his soft brown hair.
Gently pushing her back on the bed, he pulled her to the edge, his mouth mere inches from her slick heat. Moving his face slightly, he brushed the inside of her thigh with his scruff, pulling a moan from her lips. She could feel his warm breath against her clit and began to squirm.
“Please Dean,” she begged. He lay his muscled forearm across her hips, pinning her to the bed.
“Shh,” he whispered as his eyes met hers, his intense look scorching her skin. “I want to look at you, I’ve done nothing but think about you like this for weeks, just want to enjoy the view for a moment.”
She let her head fall back on the mattress, laying her arm across her closed eyes, her body buzzing as it pleaded for relief. Every second that ticked by, the intensity coiled in her belly, convincing her that she will burst into flames any second. She jerked as she felt his flattened tongue lick upwards along her damp slit, teasing her. His lips stopped at her clit, humming in satisfaction.
“Jesus, Dean,” she moaned, grasping the sheets on either side of her, “I can’t do this, it’s too much,” she cried with frustration.
Chucking, he licked her again before swirling his tongue around her sweet spot. A sound ripped from her throat that was a mix between a whine and a curse. “That’s it, Y/N,” he growls against herm “let go, I want to feel you cum.”
“No, I want to feel you inside me.” Her arms stretched to reach him, but he leaned back, just out of reach.
“You will,” he promises “but I need this first.” His tongue delved into her wet sweetness as he buried two fingers inside her, coaxing her to climax. She felt the white-hot heat building inside her as he wrapped his lips around her clit, sucking one last time, hurdling her over the edge while crying out his name. Dean was relentless, lapping up everything Y/N had given him before he glanced up at her writhing form, his chin glistening in the dim light. It was a sight that made Y/N swallow hard, the man between her legs had given her an orgasm in less than a few minutes so her mind was reeling with else he had in store for her.
“I need you, Dean.” Those four words that bled from her lips sent Dean into a frenzy.
In haste, he removed his boots, socks, jeans, and boxers before he climbed up the mattress, pulling Y/N along with him. Situated in the middle of the bed, he settled between her legs, his hard length nudging at her. Resting his forearms on either side of her head, he brushed his lips over hers as she moved her hands to entwine her fingers in his hair, deepening the kiss. Her legs then wrapped around his waist, urging him to enter her but he held back, his body taut with the effort.
“Protection?” he asks softly. “IUD,” she answered breathlessly, desperate for him to fill her. “Oh god.””
“It’s Dean” he husked playfully, his voice deep and gruff.
Kissing down her neck; cupping her breast in his hand, he rolled her taut nipple between his thumb and forefinger, a hiss of pleasure rushing from her lips as he took her nipple in his mouth, swirling his tongue over the bud before nipping it gently with his teeth. He moved to the other breast giving it equal treatment. Steadily he slowly made his way back up her body, peppering her skin with kisses as he reached her mouth, claiming her lips again in a searing kiss as he lined himself up. He slowly pushes his impressive shaft inside of her as her body stretches around his girth, tightly squeezing and slowly accommodating him.
“Y/N,” he breathes between clenched teeth, “Fuck, I’ve wanted to do this for so long, you feel so damn good.”
She murmured her approval as her hands wrapped around him, her fingers digging into his rippling back muscles with each thrust. She had fantasized about this so often, but the reality eclipses anything her imagination had come up with. His mouth moved down her exposed neck as her hands blindly explored his body. Their dual moans mingled in the bedroom as their sweat-slicked bodies met. She gripped his shoulders as they both barreled towards release.
“Babe, I’m so close,” he grits out, his rhythm stuttering. She plants her feet on the bed, meeting him thrust for thrust.
“Dean!” she cries as another orgasm rips through her body. She comes undone, her insides clench and twist around him as she digs her fingers into his back as he feels her flutter around him. Groaning her name, he buries himself deep inside her, allowing euphoria to wash over him as he coated the inside of her walls.
Breathless, he nearly collapsed on top of her but managed to hold himself up on shaky arms as she ran her fingers through his sweaty hair with a smile. He leaned down to place a sweet kiss on her mouth before laying on his back next to her as they both tried to catch their breath. Turning his head, he saw her blissed-out face staring back at him with a sleepy smile playing on her lips. He gathered her still shaking body to him, wrapping his arms around her as she rested her head on his hard chest with a satisfied sigh. She snuggled into him as he reached down to pull the sheet over them both falling into an exhausted sleep. He was so glad he didn’t listen to his own thoughts and allowed himself to enjoy being with her. The woman that had turned his life upside down.
Chapter 8
Tags: @winchest09 @katehuntington @whatareyousearchingfordean @emoryhemsworth @flamencodiva @superfanficnatural @deanwanddamons @janicho88 @talesmaniac89 @anathewierdo @compresshischest09 @supernatural-bellawinchester @jensengirl83 @this-is-what-im-reduced-to @ellewritesfix05 @moron225 @foxyjwls007 @hobby27 @unicornqu33n17 @swinchester27@ @deans-baby-momma @squirrelnotsam @clumsy-nerd104 @sarahbaker2010 @supernatural-love14 @akshi8278 @lyarr24 @angelhearts1012 @nothinbuttrouble2 @cookiechipdough @lady-pswrld @peachyafshawn @notan-applepielife
#dean winchester x reader#dean winchester x you#dean x y/n#dean x you#dean x reader#dean winchester fanfiction#dean winchester fanfic#dean winchester#dean winchester x y/n#reader insert#Dean Winchester fluff#dean winchester smut#slow burn#dean winchester series#a man of letters#waywardbeanie
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Phoenix and the Stars (2)
| Part 1 |
Carol Danvers Masterlist
Series Masterlist
A/N: woop had a mental breakdown on saturday, so that’s fun, i talked to a close friend after and wrote this, so hey not that bad. (also reader has the same background as the Maria hill one shot The One Where You Accidentally Threw a Punching Bag at Her (or sm similarly named) but check it out for the backstory)
A loud knocking at your door woke you up, you groggily checked the alarm clock, it was 4:27, what the hell. You got up and walked to the door, hand rubbing your head slightly.
“What the hell are you doing?” Carol asked, she wore a thick jacket on top of a light pink t shirt and light blue jeans with white vans. And she had a duffel bag in her hand.
“I was sleeping, now I’m asking you why I’m not sleeping anymore.” You retorted groggily, glaring at Carol who raised an eyebrow.
“We have a mission to go to in 2 minutes.” Carol stated.
“SHIT!” You yelled, retracting your hand from your head and sprinting across your room, gathering everything you could need.
Underwear, bras, t shirts, jeans, pajamas, hoodies, your thickest jacket, a fancy outfit and a dance outfit just in case. You tripped over about five pairs of shoes in order to find the right pair. Carol started laughing at you sprinting across the bed to get your things.
“Can you stop laughing and turn around so I can change?” You said aggressively, taking off your sweatshirt before she could answer. You saw her face turn a bright red before you threw your sweatshirt into the Adidas duffel bag you were preparing. You hurriedly changed into a light blue t shirt, navy blue jeans, dark blue hoodie and your signature white adidas. Grabbing a jacket while putting your shoes wasn’t the best idea, you crashed face first into your closet.
“Is Maria really that bad?” Carol joked, she had seen you prepare enough outfits for an entire week in less than a minute and you fell face first into a wooden closet not to be late.
“Oh you have no idea.” You shouted, putting on your shoes and zipping up the duffel bag. You glanced at your alarm clock to see it was 4:30 already. “Let’s go.” You said, grabbing your jacket and shouldering past Carol.
Of course, you tripped on your shoelaces instantly. A small squeal came out at the sudden loss of balance, but something stopped you before you could touch the ground. You opened your eyes as you were pulled back up by your waist.
“You’re such an idiot.” Carol said, rolling her eyes and pulling you up by your shirt, resting her arm on your waist after. “You okay?” She asked, closer to you than before.
“Uh, I’m fine, I think.” You said, your gaze accidentally slipping to her lips before you rushed back into your room to get your phone and bluetooth speaker and headphones.
“I said 4:30 sharp.” Maria said, walking through the doors with her arms crossed.
“I know, I forgot, I’m sorry.” You apologized hurriedly, shoving your phone in your back pocket and your speaker in your duffel bag.
“Let’s just go.” Maria said, walking away. You and Carol jogged a little to catch up with her. “Try to be punctual next time.”
“Well she did get 20 outfits together in a minute, cut her a bit of slack.” Carol commented, then smirked when she saw a surprised expression at her defending you. “She only forgot about the mission.”
“And here I thought you were defending me!” You said, slapping her arm slightly, causing Carol to laugh and Maria to roll her eyes.
“Would I ever?” Carol joked, you joined Maria in rolling her eyes this time.
-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-
The position for the stakeout wasn’t bad, it was terrible. The meeting for the arms dealing was across a frozen lake from a small wooden cabin, the stakeout. The cabin was barely insulated, with a broken heating system but it had multiple fireplaces.
“At least there’s two rooms.” You offered, trying to be more optimistic about it.
“Optimistic phoenix at it again.” Carol joked, setting her duffel bag in the small living room.
The ground floor was small, if anything. There was a small wooden kitchen with maybe 10 small cabinets and a fridge. The counter had 3 barstools set across from it. Right next to it, there was the living room. It had a loveseat, two single couches across a fireplace. There was a TV on the wall next to the fireplace. The door was across from the fireplace.
After going up the creaky wooden steps, you found a small hallway with two rooms directly across from each other, the only bathroom just ahead of the two doors. And no attic or basement.
“This was the best Maria could do?” Carol asked, letting out a frustrated groan and flopping down on the loveseat.
“It was the closest she could get us.” You shouted from upstairs after finding a vinyl player in one room and recordings in the other.
“Hey look what I found.” You offered, heading downstairs with the objects in your hands, the stairs creaking.
“A vinyl player?” She asked, raising a skeptical eyebrow.
“Yeah, and some newer recordings.” You stated, setting up the player on the counter and plugging it into the plug next to the barstools.
“So much fun.” Carol remarked, walking over behind you to find a few vinyls from the mid 2010’s. She picked up the 25 Adele album.
“Didn’t know you were a person for Adele.” You remarked, taking the record and putting it in. Water Under The Bridge started playing the instant you plugged it in, you couldn’t help but grin.
“I haven’t really heard much of Adele to be honest,” Carol said, her eyes widening slightly at the music. “But this sounds really good!”
“Star Girl really needs to keep up with pop culture.” You remarked, digging through the box for the first album. She slapped you on the arm jokingly and sat down in front of the fireplace, shivering slightly through her hoodie. After sorting through the records, you learnt there were only two albums from 2015, Oh Wonder and 25 by Adele. There were tons of other records from the early 2010’s and a few One Direction albums. You even found Halsey’s first album there.
You switched off the music and sat across from Carol on one of the single seaters. You noticed her shivering slightly and shot a small fireball towards the already prepared logs in the fireplace. Carol gave you a small nod and continued to stare at the fire, deep in thought.
“What’s on your mind?” You asked, leaning forwards on your elbows to get closer to the fire and to look at Carol.
“Nothing, I just,” She paused slightly and sighed. “I missed so much in the five years I was gone.”
“You only missed a ton of pop culture and memes, you’re fine.” You joked, leaning back in your chair as Carol glared at you. “No seriously, you only missed 5 years, Captain America missed a hundred, you’re honestly fine.”
Carol nodded her head, considering what you said. She knew you were right, five years wasn’t as bad as a hundred, but still.
“Thanks.” She said after a pause.
“Sure, friends?” You asked, outreaching a hand for her to shake. She looked at you skeptically before shaking your hand.
“Friends.”
-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-
“Carol we’ve been cooped up here for 3 days.” You whined, sitting next to her on the loveseat as she read one of the books she brought.
The target was supposed to arrive for the deal two days ago, and there was little to no entertainment here. You and Carol had started talking, mainly about the things in the house and a little bit about your past. You had found out she was human but captured by Kree for 5 years, and now she worked with the Avengers, neat.
“I’m aware of that.” She retorted, glancing up at you before returning to her book. You rolled your eyes and snatched her book, raising your eyebrows at her annoyance.
Both of you knew the only reason this mission was lasting so long was because of the delay, but you were bored. Currently, you were wearing a thin short sleeved t shirt and sweatpants, Carol wore a thick strapped tank top and leggings.
“I’m bored.” You stated, she raised an eyebrow in turn.
“Do you want to dance?” She joked, meaning to say if you wanted her to dance. But actually, dancing together didn’t seem like such a bad idea.
“You mean together?” You asked, she made a confused face but before she could react, you glanced at the records, shrugged and answered your own question. “Sure.”
You got up and sorted through the records, deciding the Oh Wonder records would probably be the best. ‘Technicolour beat’ started playing softly through the house as you plugged the vinyl player in. Carol was still sitting in the same place.
“Hey you said you wanted to dance.” You commented, leaning back against the window as the song continued to play.
‘Let loose your glow
Come settle down, settle down’
“Fine.” Carol grumbled and walked over to you, still a little confused on how to dance since you’d picked a slow song.
“Do you want to do a slow dance or…?” You asked curiously, watching her fidget with her hands.
“Not sure, what songs are on the recording?” She asked, you knelt down next to the record to see. “Bad idea.” She commented, seeing you were about to lift up the needle.
“Fine, though last time I listened to this album they only had the slow songs.” You commented, getting back up before realized Carol didn’t really know how to dance. “You don’t really know how to dance, do you?” You asked curiously, tilting your head to the side.
“There’s no need to rub it in.” Carol defended, crossing her arms. You laughed slightly at her defensive behaviour.
“I’m not, I’m offering to teach you.” You chuckled slightly at her shocked expression as you offered her your hand.
Carol glanced from your hand to your face, her arms still crossed for a few seconds with a raised eyebrow. You shrugged slightly and were about to take back your offer when she took your hand, your face lighting up with a smile.
“So, it’s actually really simple, don’t worry.” You joked, taking her other hand as well. “We can do waltz or the usual casual style.” You said, holding her hands in yours like it was a normal thing, Carol’s face starting to light up a bright pink.
“A mix?” She asked, you laughed slightly and nodded, missing her smile when you laughed.
“Sure, so you put your hand in mine, like this.” You instructed holding up your joined hands at eye level. “Then, since this is usually a male and a female, I’ll be the male to show-”
“Nah, let’s do it the other way around.” Carol joked, grinning at you. You giggled slightly, mirroring her grin before rethinking your instructions.
“Fine, so I put my hand on your shoulder,” You said, hesitantly resting your hand on her shoulder, directly on her skin. She blushed slightly, you could feel her tense up slightly, drawing your hand away. “Is this okay?” You asked, looking up at her slightly, a bit scared you had over stepped.
“No, it’s fine.” Carol said, relaxing slightly when you put your hand back on her shoulder.
‘Warm, unalone
Come settle down, settle down’
“Ok, well you put your hand around my waist.” You instructed, when Carol raised an eyebrow you rolled your eyes and took your hand away from her shoulder to instruct her hand, you put it right above your hip. “Like so.”
Carol blushed slightly, clenching her jaw at the closeness. Even though she wouldn’t admit it, it had been forever since she had been close with someone, it had been forever since she had danced, or waltzed as you liked to call it, and it felt… nice.
“And now?” Carol asked curiously, her voice lower than it was before. Both of you were warm, the sunlight glinting softly in your eyes and hair.
“And now we just sway.” You whispered, looking up into her eyes, feeling more relaxed than you have anytime before this mission. The two of you gently rocked from side to side, sharing body heat while everything else was cold around you.
‘And I feel life for the very first time
Love in my arms, and the sun in my eyes’
Both of you couldn’t help but blush at the lyric. You rested your head on her shoulder, shuffling slightly closer to her while swaying. You felt her tense up again, you were about to pull away before she interrupted you.
“It’s okay, you’re not making me uncomfortable.” She comforted, almost like she was reading your mind. You smiled slightly and rested your head back onto her shoulder, letting her warmth envelop you as the two of you swayed gently in the sunset. You hadn’t felt this relaxed or well, intimate in a long time. SHIELD had kind of taken away your chance at a normal relationship. But now, well you never thought you’d have this chance with the great Captain marvel, taking in the fact the two of you had only become friends a few days ago. Honestly, you wish you could read minds.
If you could, you would’ve found Carol felt a similar way. She wanted to be in a relationship, badly, but she was terrified of the consequences. She was away most of the time, her partner would suffer and so would she. To be honest, she was terrified of what loving someone could mean, but she never thought it would be as easy as this.
‘In a technicolour beat, you and me (found another feeling)
Caught up in a dream, in a technicolour beat’
The relationship had started off as enemies, gone to friends. And now, it was about to go a completely different direction, but you were ready to go through it with Carol, you didn’t know yet she felt the same way.
Tag list: @capcarolsdanver, @versdan, @lesbian-girls-wayhaught, @lovebotlarson, @dhengkt, @5aftermidnight, let me know if you’d like to be in any of my tag lists!
A/N: This was extra long to pay up for the inactivity. I’m just getting back results for exams and they are a bit disappointing. Especially English, which I expected a bit better in. This is actually one of my new fav writing pieces, so reblogs would be AMAZING, thanks. But anyway, here’s the next part of Phoenix and the Stars, feedback is amazing, thank you!
| Part 3 |
#marvel#marvel x reader#marvel x female reader#marvel x you#marvel x y/n#captain marvel#captain marvel x reader#captain marvel x female reader#captain marvel x you#captain marvel x y/n#marvel imagine#marvel one shot#captain marvel imagine#captain marvel one shot#carol danvers#carol danvers x reader#carol danvers x female reader#carol danvers x you#carol danvers x y/n#carol danvers imagine#carol danvers one shot#my writing#my fic#MYC's writing
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So I had to write an essay about a hero in my English class. I had reached the point where I didn’t care anymore so I started it off as a joke. Very quickly I realized I actually truly enjoyed the assignment. Enjoy :)
Hero Essay
“In a world. . .
With no bravery. . .
There is only one who can save us. . .”
*queue dramatic music*
“BRAVEMAN! The man who is brave!”
The TV screen illuminated the dark room. My sister, sitting on the couch with a book in hand, scoffs at me.
“You’re watching Braveman again? You know that’s not real. No one could ever be like that. ‘Bravery’ or whatever isn’t real.”
“It’s a good movie,” I say. “Dad likes it.”
“Yeah well I think it’s stupid,” she rolls her eyes. “Why don’t you read something? Something real? Like the encyclopedias. You haven’t even gotten to the letter K yet.”
I shake my head and turn back to the screen. I watch as Braveman speaks in front of a group of people and talks to strangers he doesn’t know. The thought of speaking to someone outside of my family is. . . horrifying. How does someone do that? Shaking someone’s hand? Being where everyone can see you? I wished and longed to have his powers. I glanced back at my sister. She was right. Bravery isn’t real. There’s no way I could be brave.
I woke up curled up on the floor. The credits to Braveman were scrolling on the TV. I must have fallen asleep. I looked back at the couch. It was empty.
“Must’ve gone to bed,” I mumbled to myself. “I should do the same.” I started to turn off the TV when I accidentally hit the channel button, redirecting me to the new channel. I started to slide my hand to the correct button when something caught my attention.
“We have decided it would be best for us as a community if we returned to traditions from before the epidemic of 2020.” My eyes widened. Was this really what I was hearing? I turned it up to be sure. The computer-reporter began again, “Beginning the first of August, our community will go back to having in-person schooling and work programs, and social interaction will be restored.”
I felt my jaw drop. 2020? That was the year my grandma was born! I thought. We’re going back to a lifestyle from over 70 years ago? I ran to my parents room.
“Mom! Dad! Check out the news!” I yelled as I burst into their room and woke them up. “Turn on the TV! Turn it on!”
“Gosh, Olivia!” My mom said. “You almost scared the life out of me!” She sat up and rubbed her eyes. “What’s so important?” I suddenly realized how rude I had been.
“I’m sorry,” I started to back out of the room. “Maybe it’s not that important.” My dad grabbed the remote and clicked on the TV. The news was still going.
“There have been many studies over the past 10-15 years about the pros and cons of social interaction. Although keeping to yourself was once very needed to prevent the spread of a deadly virus, our recent studies have shown that being around people is crucial for healthy development of the brain.”
“What is this?” my mom interrupted. “Are we supposed to believe -”
“Shh.” my dad quieted her. He had a very serious look on his face.
“What do you mean shh? I have-”
“Shhh!” he insisted. My mom stared at him in disbelief. I watched as his face changed from serious and confused to shocked and surprised.
“Ever since 2020, our medication has provided our brains the stimulation we need, but recent studies have shown that actual social interaction is far more effective and will save millions of dollars every year.”
I think of the pill that our entire family takes everyday. It’s always been so routine, I’ve never questioned it.
“It’s good for your brain.” I recall my dad telling me once. “Take it every morning and you’ll be good to go.” That was always enough of an explanation for me. I never knew it was to replace something we were lacking.
As my mom began to realize what was going on, she began to look terrified. My dad also looked scared. But for some reason, I wasn’t scared. I felt. . . excited? I didn’t know what I was feeling. It wasn’t fear. It wasn’t bad at all. It was something I had never felt before. . .
It has been 3 months since I saw the news about returning to an old lifestyle. 4 days until the first of August. Pretty much everything on TV has been about this lifestyle. Real people have been on TV recently instead of the typical computer-voice. They stutter and their hands shake. I can’t imagine how scary being in front of a camera would be, nonetheless one where the entire country - maybe the entire world - sees you.
We have been given study materials on the old lifestyle. It’s mostly made up of pictures from old, traditional classrooms where there were over 20 students in one room at once. That blew my mind. The most people I’ve ever been in a room with at once is 5. And that’s a lot for someone my age. There were pictures of the once-busy streets of New York, the area flooded with cars and people. I knew life was different 70 years ago, but I had never known about any of this. The only history we had been taught was that there was a disease that led to a safer community where everyone stayed at home. That’s all that I’ve ever known. That’s how I grew up. That’s how my parents grew up. And that’s how their parents grew up. My deceased grandpa, who was 8 in 2020, was the last one in my family that could’ve remembered anything from the old lifestyle, but he’s gone.
As soon as it was decided to stay indoors, anything about being out of our houses was taken out of the education system in order to make sure everyone lived indoors. Food and medication was delivered to houses. Everyone worked from home. Now, the people who once wrote at-home curriculum would become teachers. Those who helped develop medications and prepared diets designed specifically for every person would become doctors. Anyone who was still in school would remain a student, but attend school with everyone else.
I was going into my junior year and my sister was going into her senior year. She was terrified. She broke down in tears and my parents had to order a special medication to calm her down. I, however, was not scared. I didn’t know what I was. As I thought this over, the movie Braveman flashed through my head. Brave? I thought. Am I. . . brave? I thought of the feeling inside of me. I wanted to go to school. I was excited to see the streets filled with people. But I remembered what my sister told me. No. I told myself. I can’t be brave. Brave isn’t real.
I woke up to the sun shining through my window. The blinds used to always be closed, but I’ve been keeping them open to get used to the sunlight. It was bright and warm, it felt unnatural. . . even though it was the only natural light there was. I put on the new clothing that had been delivered to my house yesterday morning. Jeans, tall black socks, a blue polo shirt, and a new pair of shoes. My sister had a similar outfit, but a yellow shirt. There was also a care-package sent for all of us. On the outside of the box, there was a list that read:
Contents:
1 girl’s junior school outfit - Olivia
1 girl’s senior school outfit - Chelsea
2 backpacks (includes laptop, notebook, and 2 pencils each)
1 women's work attire - Victoria
1 men’s work attire - Ben
4 nametags - Ben, Victoria, Chelsea, Olivia
4 personal cell phone
4 instruction guides
4 personal sunscreen bottles - prolonged sun exposure may cause irritation. Please apply every 2 hours to avoid sunburn
1 anxiety pill - Chelsea
4 medication pills - THIS IS YOUR LAST DOSAGE
I got dressed and applied the sunscreen. Whatever a sunburn was did not sound pleasing. The sunscreen was oily and greasy but it smelled nice. I dropped the pill into my palm and took a deep breath. For some reason knowing this was the last one was. . . relieving, almost. I had a good feeling about today. I popped my head back and swallowed it, feeling it as it made its way down my throat.
“The bus is here!” my mom shouted from across the house. I slid the sunscreen into my pocket, grabbed my instruction book and tossed it in my bag, threw the bag over my shoulders, and ran to the door. My sister came out of her room with a worried expression on her face. I stopped and turned around towards her.
“Hey, it’ll be okay.” I reassured her. She tried to smile at me, but I could tell she was still upset. I skipped through the door and smiled big at my dad.
“Excited?” he asked.
“Yeah!” I said quickly, maybe a little too quickly based on the shocked expression on his face.
“Well that’s good!” he said and he straightened his tie. “Let’s hope today goes well. . .” I could hear the uncertainty in his voice.
I got to the door of the bus and it slid open. I took a deep breath and stepped on, my dad trailing shortly behind me. There were 2 other families on the bus. I swallowed deep and I walked through the aisle, glancing at the other people on the bus. There was another girl with a blue shirt on and I smiled at her. She looked at the ground. I thought back to the instruction book. Seat B3. I remembered. I found it, sat down quickly, and eagerly tapped my foot, waiting for the bus to move. When the rest of my family was seated, we began to roll forward. My sister had the window seat, but she slumped her head down and looked at her feet. I looked past her to see the amazing outside world, the sun shining through the tinted glass.
“Passengers,” the auto-driver’s robotic voice said, “welcome to your first day of our social lifestyle. If at any point you need help, please address your handbook or simply select the blue application on your new cell phones.”
I remembered my cell phone in my pocket. My family’s contact information accessible in the yellow application, my personal information in the red application, and help from a government official in the blue application. I glanced over at my mom who was worryingly flipping through her instruction book. My dad was looking out the window like I was, with a pleasant expression on his face. My sister was still slumped in her seat, looking at her shoes. She looked up at me and I smiled at her. I watched her close her eyes, take a deep breath, and smile at me too, this time more genuine.
The bus came to a slow stop.
“Students attending freshman, sophomore, junior, and senior year, this is your destination.”
I stood up excitedly and looked at my parents. My mom cracked a wry smile at me and my dad waved me goodbye. I smiled big and walked to the front of the bus, my sister slowly trailing behind me, along with the rest of the nervous children about to go to school.
I stepped off the steps of the bus and looked up at the large building in front of me. GRANDBURY HIGH SCHOOL was carved into the front of the large, stone entrance. The students gathering in a group behind me were also gazing at the building we had never seen before. I glanced at the girl with the blue shirt and read her name tag. “REBECCA JONES”, it read. Rebecca. I thought. I’m gonna try to be friends with Rebecca. I decided. She realized I was looking at her so I tried smiling at her again. Slowly, a small smile formed on her face. She began to walk forward, so I followed.
There were kiosks set up for us to check in. I walked up to one and scanned my nametag. It buffered for a second then displayed a message. WELCOME, OLIVIA BARREN. PLEASE REPORT TO ROOM 127 - ENGLISH. A map showed the school hallways, with a green line leading me down the hallway to the right. The phone in my pocket began to vibrate, so I pulled it out of my pocket. The screen lit up with the map displaying on the kiosk. I followed the green line displayed on my phone until I reached room 127.
I walked into the room. There were already a few students sitting in their seats. We were all wearing a blue shirt, except for one lady at the front of the room who was wearing a maroon shirt. Must be the teacher. I thought to myself. I walked through the aisles of desks until I found my name. OLIVIA B it read on the tiny screen on the corner of the desk. I hung my backpack on the hook on the back of the chair, and sat down, then remembered what I had read in the instruction book. I scanned my name tag. The screen glowed green, indicating I had been marked as present.
The room began to fill up, but it remained silent. Everyone kept their eyes low, even the teacher. I watched Rebecca walk in, but she didn’t see me. When everyone’s desks had green glowing where their names were, the teacher stood at the center of the front of the room and cleared her throat.
“Hello, class.” she was sweating and her hands were shaky, but she took a deep breath and continued. “Uhh...I am Ms.Greene.” I felt like chuckling at her silly color name, but I refrained. “I will be teaching english. This will be the first class you will report to every morning.” She paused and collected her thoughts. She cleared her throat again. “Is, uh, is there anyone who would like to introduce themselves?”
Somehow the silence became even quieter. Everyone was stiff in their seats, staring at their desks. The only thing you could hear was the tapping of my foot, which was rapidly speeding up. Everyone sat there for what seemed like forever. Ms.Greene stared at her feet and waited for anything to happen.
The feeling inside of me that I had been feeling all day grew even larger. Scenes from Braveman flashed in my head. Talking in front of people. Shaking hands. Being brave. This. I thought, but it felt more like I was screaming in my head. This is it. This is your chance. Your chance to be brave. I took a deep breath and I clutched the edge of my desk. What are you waiting for? I continued to hold still. What are you waiting for?!
Suddenly, I stood up. The entire class stared at me. My teacher looked startled and terrified. Rebecca looked at me with her mouth agape. The kid next to me looked as if he had seen a ghost.
“My name is Olivia,” I say. “Olivia Barren.” I look around the room and a strange, proud happiness fills me. “It’s nice to meet all of you.” I smile big and sit back down.
That was it. I thought. That was bravery.
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So how did Hop find out about Billy’s home life
Hellohellohello! I feel like this is a very important thing to expand on bc i understand i just kinda write about the fluffy stuff AFTER Hop found out but not about the stuff that lead up to it so! I’m glad someone asked about this!!! And i’m sorry if anyone has gotten confused at all, i know it’s a little confusing ♥
Okay so i wrote a fic (on my blog here and on AO3 here) about when Hop first picks up Billy. I also wrote a post a few months back when i started this blog that describes my main thoughts ((some of them have changed since then but they’re basically the same)) right here! but lemme also summarize it all and give some more info as to what i think about this:
{Disclaimer: mentions of abuse}
So Billy and Max and their family have been in town for almost a week and after the first day Billy gets pulled over by Officer Callahan for driving fast and drunk. So of course Callahan tells Hop and Hop also hears some stuff from his secretary about the new family that just moved in bc she meets Susan at the grocery store and they get to talking. So Hop knows that there’s a new family, knows they have a kid who’s already a troublemaker, knows this kid’s mom is actually his step-mother and that they’ve just moved to Indiana after school has already started (bc hi, tell me who in America starts right before Halloween???? Bc that just seems strange to me, i feel like they’re starting school after everyone else. bc starting school right before Halloween is very very Late)
So on Sunday night, Neil is an asshole to Billy during dinner and Billy steals a bottle of liquor from him and drinks about half of it in his room before Neil walks in and catches Billy looking at himself in the mirror w/ his stolen alcohol. And Neil gets furious and hits Billy hard and bruises him up before throwing him out, throwing gay slurs on top of him for good measure, and tells him to be back in the morning to pick up Max.
And so Hop is on his way back home when he sees Billy speeding. He pulls him over and they have a little row before Hop sees the bruises and the cut on Billy’s cheekbone and eventually he coaxes Billy into letting Hop take him to his cabin bc Billy is clearly tired and broken and very much hurt. He doesn’t wanna make him sleep in the drunk tank the night before his first day of school, so he takes him home and gives him a blanket and a pillow and threatens his life if he were to ever tell anyone about El and that sketches Billy out but he takes what he’s offered and shuts up about it.
And El is confused, angry bc “why does he come here and Mike doesn’t?”
But she sees Billy move tentatively and recognizes something of herself in him. She sees him and understands that he looks how she feels sometimes and Hop will give her a blanket and a glass of water when that happens so El does that for Billy. Sits down with him and accidentally calls him “pretty” out loud and then runs away.
It takes a while for Billy to sleep, but he does.
And when he gets kicked out or has to leave the house or whatever happens, he’ll drive out close to where Hop’s cabin is and claim it’s subconscious and Hop always takes him in bc he feels for this kid. He sees himself in this kid.
Bc Hop isn’t stupid: he can put two and two together. He’s pretty sure he saw Neil at Melvalds a couple days ago. The man reminds Hop of his own father and lord knows Hop didn’t have a great relationship with that jackass. He saw Neil and thought that man looked like the kind that got too invested in the war. The kind that believed all the bullshit the government threw up onto the country like it was going to keep them afloat. He sees his hard eyes and strong face made harder by combat but really, he sees a weak man who thinks hitting his son is the best way to show dominance.
And from the way Billy acts, Hop can tell this goes back to when Billy was a kid. No one acts like that w/o some serious damage. Hop just likes that Billy is nice to El.
In fact, he’s really nice to El. He takes a liking to her right away bc she’s always asking him questions about the world and his clothes and his hair and “what does that say?” as if he’s already her brother. And he answers like he’s already her brother. And Hop feels it in his chest, that paternal feeling of he needs a home.
And he doesn’t wanna start taking kids in like they’re dogs but he just… he can feel it. He knows this boy deserves better than what he’s getting. One day he’s hurt so much that Hop is worried about El even seeing him. It’s on Friday and fuck Hop knows the tactic. Hurt him harder Friday, let the injuries heal up before Monday. So he doesn’t walk up to school with a black eye and a bruised nose. So no one suspects.
It boils Hop’s blood. He wants to make an arrest. He wants to do something. But Billy is still a deer in headlights in their home. He still sleeps with his boots on. Hell, he’s only been around 2 or 3 times.
And when El wakes up in the middle of one night that Billy is there, crying and screaming and wailing and calming down only when Hop is there to comfort her, Billy asks in the morning what was wrong. She cites “Papa.”
And Billy asks Hop to come outside and then, when they’re both out, swings at Hop hard. Barely makes contact bc Hop sees and dodges and watches Billy stumble over the ground.
“What the fuck, kid?”
“Do you hit her?”
Hop is completely taken aback.
“What?”
“Do you hit that little girl?”
And Hop is amazed that this boy is fully ready to pick a fight with him, someone arguably much larger than him, just over his daughter. Hop asks why he would ever think that. Billy mentions the Papa comment. Hop explains that’s not him. He stumbles over his words trying to explain his relationship to El w/o explaining all of the monster shit that’s happening around here but it’s hard and he’s fed up and has to go to work so he just says:
“You shouldn’t be mixed up in this!”
Billy just yells back: “Then why did you bring me here?” angry and red and sweating bc he finally thought he found a place but now it’s lost again and so he drives himself to school in a fury. He doesn’t visit Hop anymore. and it’s good that way bc Hop is off on a journey figuring out about this town going to shit at the hands of a monster and El is leaving for Chicago and then Billy has to find Max.
But on the way he finds Steve, wandering into a junkyard, the kids on top of a bus. He gets mixed up in monster fighting and the nightmares that invade this town in the dark and he dry heaves from all of the stress. He reunites w/ Hop and El and rekindles a better relationship w/ Max and he goes back home to more abuse.
And Hop sees it, lets Billy come over even when nothing’s wrong just bc he feels better here, calmer here, safer here than he ever did at home. Hop buys Billy his own mug and starts letting him have the bed.
“I’ll sleep on the couch.”
“C’mon, Chief. You’re way bigger than me, you can’t-”
“You’re not gonna sleep on this couch any more. Take the bed, I’ll be fine over here.”
And Hop starts to learn how to father Billy, boils a little hotter with every new bruise he sees, and eventually goes through the very tedious battle of gaining custody. But it’s worth it bc now he has his hot headed son ~♥
#billy hargrove#chief jim hopper#eleven#el hopper#steve harrington#harringrove#billy hopper#but like PRE billy hopper!#ask#anonymous#i'm so sorry this feels kind of......... jumbled????????????????????#a lot of my writing today has felt kind of jumbled#i'm just a little jumbled. ♥#those other posts i cited might be written better#well my fic is DEF written better than this word vomit woops#i triiiiiied i'm sorry if you wanted something different!!#like sincerely sorry#if you wanted something a bit more fluffy lemme know???#and i'll write something a bit more fluffy ♥#thanks for the ask anyway!!!#this might the last one i post today????????????????????????????????????????/#i'll probably still write some more but i'll also probably post those tomorrow!
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No Labels, All Love: Part 2 to ‘All Wrong’ (g.d. & e.d.)
Summary: This is a part 2 to the imagine All Wrong that I wrote some weeks ago. If you haven’t read it yet, check it out here!
A/N: Depending on the feedback for this one, I may add another part! It just depends on what people want to read, so please let me know :) I would also like to THANK YOU ALL tremendously for your continual support, even though it’s taken me centuries to update this time around. I hope that the wait was well worth it. Also, let me know what you thought of the racy parts and if I should possibly pursue that or never do it again lol. Enjoy!!!!
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The TV in front of me could just as well be displaying a blank screen and blaring white noise; I wouldn’t notice. The past several hours have found me sitting nearly stock-still on my living room couch, glossy eyes fixated in the general direction of the flat screen mounted on the wall. I pick up my phone and rest my finger on the power button without applying any pressure before tossing it back onto the couch.
This is a routine I’ve been participating in for hours now: picking up my phone, then setting it back down and worrying my lower lip violently with my teeth. I pick it up for the millionth time and finally decide to power it on. My stomach drops as I watch the screen begin to come to life, the white apple staring me down tauntingly as I await what is sure to be an onslaught of text messages and missed calls. Hopefully.
I pretend like my heart isn’t beating out of my chest as my phone finally finishes powering up. I type in my passcode and wait with bated breath. For a moment, there’s nothing. No new alerts, no new text messages. But then, like an avalanche, the notifications come flooding in. I begrudgingly acknowledge the hopeful lurch that my stomach gives as I watch both Ethan’s and Grayson’s names flash intermittently across my screen for several long moments.
When the chaos comes to a definitive halt, I dare to thumb into my text messages only to find that I have a significant amount more than I did when I had powered off my phone in defiance hours ago. Thumbing into my messages, I see that my most recent texts come from both Ethan and Grayson, respectively. I heave a deep sigh in hopes of releasing some of the butterflies trapped in my stomach as I tap Grayson and I’s conversation first.
Every text bubble visible in the conversation is gray, indicating Grayson’s insistence. I scroll to the top of his slew of messages. I don’t even know what to say. I’m so sorry; Ethan and I met these girls a few weeks ago at an event and they asked us to hang out. We had no intentions of hooking up with them. It just happened; I know that’s not an excuse. I promise this doesn’t change anything between us. I love you so much; Me and Ethan have been trying to call you for hours. Please answer. As I look over a few more texts, all along the lines of Grayson professing his love for me and begging me to call or text him back, I feel a pinch behind my eyes that’s quickly accompanied by tears blurring my vision.
“Fuck,” I curse quietly to myself, wiping roughly at my cheeks and willing the tears to stop flowing. I thumb, next, into Ethan and I’s conversation. It’s much of the same thing that I saw from Grayson. Through teary eyes, I skim over some of the texts that Ethan’s left for me. I hate myself right now. I hate hurting you; You’re still our number one girl. Always; Baby, please talk to us. Even if it’s to yell at us. I just wanna hear your voice; I miss you. Please. The phone drops to my lap as I bury my face in my hands, shoulders shaking with silent cries.
The knot in my belly tightens as I replay the events of today in my mind’s eye. I envision Grayson’s taught stomach, muscles rippling with the effort that it took for him to drive relentlessly in and out, in and out. I see, next, Ethan’s eyes closed, eyebrows and forehead furrowed in bliss, mouth slightly agape as he guided the mysterious brunette over his lap in a sultry rhythm. My jaw clenches reflexively and I find myself gritting my teeth as I try my hardest to ward off these invasive thoughts.
I’m so caught up in my own head that I nearly jump out of my skin when my phone begins to buzz violently in my iron grasp. An incoming call from Grayson.
I give a pathetic sniffle as I attempt to collect myself, fully weighing the pros and cons of answering this call. I know that, eventually, the boys will show up at my door if I don’t give them some indication that I’m okay. I think I’m too upset to see them in person right now. This is the logic that fuels me to accept the incoming call, putting the phone on speaker and placing it onto the empty couch cushion next to me without a word. The first thing I hear on the other line is a heavy sigh.
“She answered,” comes Grayson’s relieved voice, clearly addressing Ethan before jumping right into our own conversation, “baby? Hello, can you hear me?” he asks, bordering on frantic after not hearing from me for hours on end. I let some beats of silence pass as my heart thuds wildly in the confines of my chest. Even just hearing Grayson’s voice is making me an emotional wreck right now.
“Hi,” I finally chime in meekly, trying my hardest to keep my voice steady after having cried only minutes ago.
“Let us see you. Please, we need to see you,” he begs and I could swear that I hear his voice waver for a moment. “Please, just for a few minutes,” he bargains before I can even respond to his first plea. The raw emotion lacing his words is, admittedly, enough for a lump to begin forming in my throat. Regardless of the situation, I hate the idea that Grayson could be close to tears because of me.
“Alright,” I choke out before I even really know what I’m saying.
“Alright?” Grayson repeats like he can’t believe I’ve agreed to this. Part of me can’t believe it either. There’s commotion and then all of a sudden, I’m hearing Ethan’s voice instead.
“Thank you. We’ll be right there. You won’t regret it. God, thank you,” he babbles. “We’ll be there in 20 minutes or less,” he promises and I nod wordlessly for a moment.
“Okay,” I croak out before moving to end the call, but Ethan interjects.
“I fucking love you so much. I love you, okay? I always will,” he stresses and I busy myself with picking at a loose thread on my leggings to keep from crying again. This entire situation has me in an emotional bind. I want nothing more than to tell Ethan that I love him right back, more than I can put into words. But I can’t seem to make my mouth form the sentence. The silence lingers for longer than it ever has after one of us has said an ‘I love you.’ Ethan eventually concludes that he won’t be getting a reciprocation of his affections anytime soon and ends the call with a dejected “I’ll see you soon.”
With the call having ended, I’m left with nothing but the company of my racing thoughts. I have no idea how I’ve ended up in this situation, suddenly awaiting the company of the two boys who put me in this predicament to begin with. I give up on attempting to watch TV altogether, finally switching it off for the first time since I’ve gotten home. What follows is the shortest 20 minutes in history. I feel like I’ve barely gotten a chance to blink when I’m hearing a knock upon my front door.
My heart plummets to the depths of my stomach as I shuffle toward the source of the noise. It’s the moment of truth and that is abundantly clear in the way my palms sweat and the way my breath hitches. In a last ditch effort to appear collected, I run the back of my hand under each of my eyes to get rid of any stray tears. With an unsteady hand, I reach out to latch onto the door handle and pull open the door to reveal two of the most distraught looking twins I’ve ever seen.
It’s only been a few hours since the incident, but Grayson and Ethan look like they haven’t slept in days. Grayson’s hair is a disheveled mess, a stark contrast to the carefully crafted style that he had been wearing it in for the past couple of weeks. He’s donning an untucked, wrinkled white T-shirt and a pair of pinstriped trousers with some scuffed up slides. Ethan’s appearance is much the same, except that he’s wearing a hoodie and sweatpants with dirty sneakers. It’s apparent to me that both boys threw something on so that they could get here as quickly as possible.
None of us say anything for a few long moments. Just as my eyes are scanning them, I see that they’re doing the same to me. We’ve never had to confront an issue this huge in our relationship before and it’s clear that none of us know quite how to go about it.
“Can we come in?” Grayson is the one who dares to break the silence first. His voice is gentle; tentative in a way, as if he doesn’t want to accidentally scare me off after he and Ethan have gotten this close. I nod my head and step aside so that the boys can cross the threshold, careful to keep my distance because I can already feel my resolve crumbling in the few seconds that they’ve been here. They make me so weak.
I try desperately to maintain a strong front as I watch them sink down onto the couch that I had previously rested on and I opt, instead, for the chair nextto the couch, afraid that my judgement may be clouded if I’m sandwiched between them. This attempt at distance doesn’t go unnoticed as Ethan’s eyes dart almost imperceptibly to the chair I’ve placed myself in before he casts his eyes down at his feet altogether.
“I need you to look at me when I say this,” Grayson begins suddenly, grabbing my attention immediately with the intensity behind his words. When I look over to him, I find that he’s already piercing me with an unwavering stare. I wait quietly for him to continue, giving him my full attention. “What you saw earlier meant nothing. It was a stupid hookup and E and I just needed to blow off some steam. We’ve been so busy editing and filming lately and we’ve had so much pent up energy. We figured that the best way to let out that energy would be to hook up with some random girls and that turned out to be such a mistake,” Grayson explains. I notice that Ethan nods his agreement at the appropriate moments throughout Grayson’s speech.
I appreciate the honesty, I really do. But that doesn’t stop my stomach from lurching every time the word “hookup” is mentioned. With the mention of the word, of course, comes the accompanying mental image of what I walked in on earlier today. I wait for Grayson to continue, but he seems to have said his part for now. He stares me down with sorrowful eyes, silently pleading with me to understand. I don’t know what to say just yet but luckily, Ethan picks up the slack.
“We’ll never talk to those girls again. We won’t talk to any other girls, if that’s what you want. How can we prove to you that we’re totally and completely yours? Tell us what to do and we’ll do it,” he bargains running a hand nervously through his hair as his eyes capture mine just like Grayson’s had. I gnaw on the inside of my cheek as I consider the enticing yet entirely unrealistic proposition. It’s not that I don’t want the boys to enjoy themselves. At 19 years old and living on their own in LA, the boys are truly in their prime. It would be cruel of me to keep them on any sort of leash and also completely out of my depth to do so. It dawns on me now that I’m not entirely sure how to broach this subject.
I could maybe settle on something like I’m kind of in love with you guys. Both of you guys. So it actually would be really nice if you never talked to any girls other than me and your mom and your sister ever again! But that would be totally unfair and I know that and a part of them knows that, too. So I decide to be decent about this whole thing. As decent as I can be, given the way that I truly feel.
“I couldn’t ask you guys to do that.” I finally force a full sentence out of my mouth since the boys have arrived here. My voice sounds oddly quiet and scratchy, throat raw from the hours I spent crying off-and-on earlier. Ethan looks as if he’s about to protest. He gets as far as opening his mouth before I continue. “That wouldn’t be fair and you know it. We’re our own people, all three of us. We love and care about each other. I love and care about you both so much,” I pause to bite my tongue, positively annoyed at the way that my eyes begin to fill up. Grayson immediately stands to his feet when he notices, ready to comfort me, but I hold out my hand, shaking my head.
“No, no.Thank you, but no. If you come over here and hold me, I’ll break down and I won’t get a chance to say what I want to say to you guys. So please, not yet,” I explain to Grayson and he looks like he’s having an intense internal battle with himself before he sinks back into his seat, nodding his head out of respect for my decision. I take a moment to compose myself and then I clear my throat before pushing through. “Because I love you guys the way I do, I could never ask you to give up your freedom because of me. You guys are young, single, successful, insanely handsome men. I want you both to thrive with whoever you meet. I would be robbing the world of two wonderful people if I asked you not to talk to girls just because of my own insecurities.”
It’s like, once I’ve started spilling my guts, I can’t seem to stop. “I just. When I walked in on you guys earlier, I felt like,” I search for the right words before settling on, “this small,” and I emphasize that by bringing my thumb and pointer finger together until they’re basically touching. Both boys furrow their eyebrows out of concern almost simultaneously, clearly uncomfortable with the idea of causing me distress, but let me continue without interrupting nonetheless. “When I’m with you guys, I feel like I’m on top of the world. You both make me feel like the most beautiful woman on the planet, but I just feel like all of that went out the window when I saw you enjoying other women. And I know that’s ridiculous. I know it is,” I reason, growing frustrated with my own inner turmoil over the situation.
“You guys are the first people I want to share exciting news with and the first people I turn to when I’m having a shit day and the first people I come crawling to when I just need to be loved. And you’ve given me all of that, always. You don’t owe me anything beyond that. We’ve never discussed anything beyond friendship between us,” I trail off, trying to figure out the best way to word my thoughts.
“We’re more than friends to each other. We all know that,” Grayson defends gently and my eyes widen at him addressing the elephant that’s been in the room since the boys and I first met each other. And the thing is, he’s not wrong. But that doesn’t make it any easier for me to search for the right words to convey that. So I settle on opening and closing my mouth a few times before giving up and just simply nodding my agreement to his statement.
“I’m not saying we have to label anything, but I think we can agree that you wouldn’t like seeing me and E with other women and we wouldn’t be thrilled to see you with another guy,” Grayson continues when he figures out that he temporarily has the floor. I give that some serious thought. The last thing I want to do is stifle these beautiful boys and I express as much.
“That may be true, Gray. But I never want you guys to feel like you can’t go out and experience life and have fun just because I’d have an attitude about some bitches - lovely women - that you might decide to bring home,” I comically correct myself mid-sentence to lighten up the mood and it proves at least a little effective as I watch Ethan crack a smile, eyes all but twinkling as he stares in my direction. Grayson looks visibly more relieved when he responds, the corners of his mouth twitching up into a gentle smile.
“We could never feel like we’re missing out on life experiences and fun when we have you,” he pipes up softly and it’s like a switch has been flipped as I stand up and rush over to him on the couch. I pull him to my chest and he’s a little shocked at first, but he quickly adjusts, standing up to wrap his strong arms around me and pulling me as close as humanly possible. He pulls back momentarily to sweep some hair off my face and behind my ear, resting his forehead against mine and maintaining unwavering eye contact in our impossibly close proximity. “Fuck, I love you,” he breathes and my heart swells as a smile helplessly takes over my face.
I run my fingers through his messy hair, attempting to style it and he just watches me, droopy eyes shining in content. “I love you too, Gray.”
“Can I kiss you?” he mutters, lips brushing against mine every so often in the limited space between us. Instead of answering, I choose to surge forward just enough so that his plush lips are cushioned against mine. He wastes no time in introducing his tongue into the kiss and it becomes hot and heavy in a matter of moments. Before things can go too far, I begrudgingly pull away and kiss the tip of his button nose. He looks mildly frustrated when he opens his eyes and his grumpy expression makes my heart flutter at how utterly adorable he is in this moment.
“I know you have blue balls, but you’re gonna have to wait until later,” I tease, referring to how I had walked in on him getting his dick wet earlier. He purses his lips slightly, shaking his head with playful disdain.
“You are in for it later,” he threatens, raising his eyebrows at me before gradually loosening his hold. I bite my bottom lip at the promise of later as he backs away. “I’m gonna go take care of my situation, if you don’t mind,” he declares before heading in the direction of my bathroom. I smile teasingly at him until he closes the door and then I spin around to face Ethan. He’s still sitting on the couch and he’s chuckling lightly at Grayson’s misfortune. He stares up at me with a smirk still etched onto his lips.
“Are you gonna do that to me, too? Give me a little bit and then make me wait until later?” he asks, reaching out two hands to rub up and down on the outsides of my thighs. I burrow my fingers into his gorgeous head of hair, shrugging my shoulders playfully at the question.
“Probably,” I state bluntly and he rolls his eyes humorously before tugging me down, implying that he wants me to straddle his lap and I do just that. With both legs wrapped around his middle, I allow him to continue caressing my legs as we just stare at each other, mapping out each other’s faces. “Kiss me,” I breathe out and Ethan obeys right away. He takes his time with it, sealing his mouth over mine and gently probing his tongue in to explore my mouth and my own tongue. He’s meticulous with the way that his hands run all over my body and it sets my skin on fire. His hands eventually come to rest over the swell of my ass and he gives it an experimental squeeze, earning a soft moan out of me. When he hears the noise, he’s encouraged to do it again.
This kiss is going a lot further than I intended, but I have no plans to stop it any time soon, especially when I feel Ethan’s hands slide to my hips, gently guiding them in a rocking motion over his lap. Without even thinking, I follow his lead, grinding down onto his crotch and this time, we both moan out in satisfaction. The position we’re in reminds me painfully of what I saw earlier; how the woman rode him in Grayson’s bed. There’s something so hot about taking her place and being the one who ended up there instead.
“You like when your girls are on top?” I breathe against his lips and he groans before claiming my lips again. But he’s pulling back soon enough to growl out an affirmative “Fuck yeah.” Grayson’s thundering voice breaks us apart.
“Hey, how come I didn’t get some of that?” he protests and, even though my heart is thudding wildly out of the surprise of being interrupted, I can’t help but to bury my face in Ethan’s shoulder as I’m overtaken with soft, silent laughter. Ethan sighs out heavily, clearly having been caught off guard as well. I can’t see his face right now, but I can only imagine that he’s staring daggers in Grayson’s direction.
“Grayson, I swear to god,” he starts menacingly between gritted teeth and that’s when I let out a full laugh, pulling back to stare into Ethan’s irritated face.
“My sweet boy,” I murmur gently, tracing the chiseled planes of his face with my finger and watching as the irritation drains from his expression at a moment’s notice. “Later,” I promise, just as I told him I would and he groans again for a different reason this time. I smirk as I dismount from his lap and his arms begrudgingly return to his sides as I stand before him once again. I all but prance toward the kitchen, more than pleased with myself for leaving both of my boys absolutely salivating after me after all of today’s events.
“She’s gonna get it later,” Grayson says to Ethan, but he purposely says it loud enough for me to hear. Ethan chimes in readily.
“Oh, absolutely. Gonna tear that ass up,” he agrees and Grayson’s affirmative mmhm is enough to have me weak in the knees. Maybe I wasn’t totally wrong after all.
#dolan twins imagine#grayson dolan#ethan dolan#grayson dolan imagine#ethan dolan imagine#dolan twins#dolan tuesday#dolan twins instagram#dolan twins youtube#dolan twins twitter#dolan twins smut#grayson dolan smut#ethan dolan smut#dolan twins fic#dolan twins blurb#dolan twins one shot#dolan twins fanfic#blurb#imagine#one shot#fanfic#fic#my fic
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the life and times of darhkatom chapter 2
Title: the life and times of darhkatom
Rating: T
Pairing: Nora Darhk/Ray Palmer aka Darhkatom
Warnings: none
Summary/Notes:
Mostly unrelated darhkatom oneshots, either episode tags or just random goblin thoughts my brain decides to fic.
“let’s get physical”
I wrote this literally ages and ages ago and promptly killed @princesstomaz and @timetravelingpalmer with it but it's been a while so all can enjoy it finally. Darhkatom sparring, they get a little saucy, is anyone really surprised? No.
Also before any of y'all come at me in the comments, I have actual martial arts training. So I do actually know how what they're doing works.
ao3 link: here
She didn’t think anything could spook her anymore, except maybe Ray’s constant declarations of his undying love for her. But that wasn’t the ‘I am still shaken up about it after two days’ spooked feeling that had constantly gnawed at Nora since they got back from their mission.
It should’ve been a piece of cake. Nora had her magic until she suddenly didn't. She saw that Ray was about to be attacked and rather than her magic reacting more powerfully in her impulse, it didn’t work at all so when she jumped in front of him, she got the wind knocked out of her by her attacker who was nearly twice her size.
She would never let that happen ever again.
Nora found Ray in his lab, she normally would come up behind him and try to distract him from his work but nervousness bubbled in her stomach, overruling her urge to be sexy.
“Hey…” she finally said.
Ray noticed her and smiled. “Hey!” He broke away from his work and gave her a sweet kiss. “What brings you down to my lovely laboratory?”
Nora hopped up on his work table and started playing with a small wrench to busy her hands. “No reason I just like watching you work…” The longer she was with Ray the worse of a liar she seemed to become.
Ray realized Nora not in fact here to just 'watch him work' and stopped what he was doing. He stepped between her legs and placed his hands on her hips to get her to look at him. “Are you okay? I mean after the other day? I was pretty sure you were going to have us surgically fused after that. Not that I’m complaining.”
Nora smiled sadly. “No yeah, I’m doing better… I was actually wondering if you could help me… spar?”
Ray looked her in the eye, a little puzzled. “Spar with you?”
Nora hid her face in his chest. “Sorry yeah I just… that guy… he was just so much bigger than me… I need to realize that I can’t always count on my ‘magic fingers’ as you call them, to protect me. I know some but I’ve never faced an attacker one on one that’s so much bigger than me without my magic.” She sighed.
Ray tipped her face up to look at him. “I will always be there to protect you… you know that… and I know you can protect yourself, so if this is really something you want to do… I’ll help you. Why don’t we meet in the training room this evening?”
Nora smiled. “I know but I do want to do this. Thanks, Ray.” She pulled him in for a soft kiss. “You’re the best.”
xxxx
Nora met him in the training room, ready to go. Her hair was pulled back in a ponytail and she had on a sports bra, leggings, and sneakers. Ray was in a tank top and sweatpants. She knew she needed to focus, to be professional, to not stare at how sexy her boyfriend looked. Nora took in a deep breath and greeted him.
Ray saw her walk in and nearly had a heart attack upon seeing her: tiny little purple sports bra, skin tight leggings to match, hair pulled back, her neck, her lovely supple neck that he loved to kiss and nip at was on full display. She did this on purpose.
“Have you come prepared to defend yourself, Miss Darhk?” Ray teased.
“You bet your ass I have, Dr. Palmer.” She pressed her body close to his and pulled him in for a deep kiss. “Sorry…" She grinned. "I had to get that out of my system if I’m going to be able to concentrate on actually sparring with you and not about how sexy I think you look.”
Ray smirked. “I’m glad you did it so I could also reroute my thoughts for similar reasons.” He ran his hands up and down her back and gently brushed her ass, and if it weren’t for the look on his face, Nora would’ve sworn it was accidental. But she knew better.
“Don’t get cocky on me, Ray Palmer, you do know I have actual martial arts training it’s just… my familiarity with opponents of your size is lacking…” She broke away from him and readied herself.
“I thought by now you’d be quite used to sparring with someone my size.”
“Are you going to keep flirting or are you going to fight me?”
“I don’t want to hurt you, Nora. Tap out if something is actually painful, okay?”
“And here I thought we’d use our safeword: Gumball.” She winked. “What’s the first thing you’re gonna teach me, Ray?”
Ray swallowed hard, actually sparring with her would be hard for two reasons: he didn’t want to hurt her and he was already so incredibly turned on by their flirting, her outfit, and so he wasn’t sure he’d actually be an effective opponent given that all of his thoughts were clouded by wanting to have his way with her on the mat.
He needed to focus. She wanted him to do this and he was going to be no help to her if he kept thinking of her this way. Ray let out a deep breath. Okay, he was finally read to go.
“I’m going to teach how you can get out of almost any hold, no matter the person’s size. If you can figure out how to defend yourself in such close combat, you can do anything. Now I’m going to come in swinging and you need to block my punch and we’ll go from there.”
Nora nodded and Ray started at her, she stepped out of the way of his punch and he quickly grabbed her around her middle to hold her to his person. “I said block, not deflect,” he smirked, “but this works too.”
Nora struggled to release herself from his grasp, annoyed that she somehow had made it worse for herself. She tried to elbow Ray in the ribs to see if that would make him let go but she just didn’t have the room to.
“Okay so if I have you like this you need to get my balance. It’s all about balance, okay? Turn your body and sweep your right leg behind my right foot and get low.” Nora wasn’t sure if she should believe his instructions but did as he asked, suddenly she felt almost all of his weight bear down on her, it had worked but now she wasn’t sure what to do next. She hesitated for too long and lost her own footing, falling face down on the mat with Ray crumpling on top of her.
Ray quickly separated himself from her and helped her sit up. “Are you okay?”
Nora pinched the bridge of her nose. “I think so, my ankle feels a little funny but I think I can walk it off.” She rotated her ankle a couple of times to stretch it out.
“I’m sorry, I should’ve been more attentive in my instructions.” He placed a hand on her shoulder. “Can you stand?”
Nora nodded and he helped her up. Her ankle felt fine the more she stretched it and she walked up and down the mat trying to get her bearings again. She came back over to Ray who settled his hands comfortably on her hips. She sighed and looked up at him. “I think I’m ready to try again.”
“Are you sure?”
“Yes.” She nodded.
Ray kissed her forehead before stepping away. He threw a punch again and she let herself get trapped again, sweeping her leg behind his ankle and used the arm around her now as leverage and shifted her hips, throwing him over her shoulder. She straddled Ray’s hips and pinned him down with her forearm across his chest. “How was that?” She smirked.
Ray felt like the wind had been knocked out of him and he looked up at Nora who looked so proud of herself. Ray grinned and locked his legs around her thighs and flipped them. “Not bad.” He smirked and kissed her. Ray finally was able to run his hands over her skin the way he’d been thinking about since she walked in. He toyed with the waistband of her leggings and slipped his hands back up her body all the way up to her cheeks. He cupped her face in his hands and kissed her once more. “Not bad at all, Miss Darhk.”
“Well I had a good teacher.” She raised an eyebrow and pulled him in for a searing kiss, the rest of their sparring session forgotten.
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Who is Tom Holland (Tom Holland Fanfic)
Author: @ineedsomemoremetime
Pairing: Tom Holland x Ella Green
Summary: Ella was living a normal life reading and writing all the time until she gets the opportunity of her life, that’s when things get crazy. She gets to meet a celebrity and write a biography about them.
Word Count: 2k
Chapter 1:
When I was kid, I used to always say that by the time I was 19 I would be married and by 20, I would by having my first child. I would be working in a job that pays so well, that I have so much money I don’t know what to do with it. But I would also be working at a job I love, because I would be fulfilling my dream. But now that I’m 20 I realize I don’t want a kid nor do I want to be married this young. I also don’t have a job that makes me a lot of money. Actually it barely makes me enough to pay bills and hopefully eat something during the week.
I know I would probably be doing so much better if I went to college, but when you can’t afford it, and can’t even get a loan, it's pointless to go.
I’m not saying I hate my job, because it’s not bad, it really isn’t. I occasionally deal with amazing customers who make my day so enjoyable. But at the same time I also deal with customers who make me want to either chop my head off or theirs. I do the same thing day after day, which is typically okay. But, I’ve worked in retail since I was 16, this isn’t something I want to do for a living. What do I want to do? I got no clue.
“Ella, would you please bring me the put away rack?” Mia my manager asks. I stand back up from putting more bags out and almost run into Macie.
“You are so lucky I put the scissors back before I started walking this way.”
“Are you saying, you could of just stabbed me?” I ask shocked as I start heading to grab the put away rack for Mia.
“Would of been your own fault.” She replies while walking to the back room to grab some more boxes to start checking in.
Macie has worked her for about 2 years now, she's that coworker you really can’t stand but put up with them so there isn’t any drama. She was offered a management position about a year ago but she turned it down because she only wanted to work 10 to 15 hours a week instead of 40. Since she turned it down they had to go out and hire someone new, Diana. She was a manager for 2 months then she quit when she got another job. So, now we're stuck with Macie thinking she has the authority of a manager without working the hours and doing the job.
“What am I hearing about someone stabbing someone?” Mia asks when I bring her the rack.
Mia’s the head boss, but the way we can act with her, makes it seem like she's just a normal worker. I think that's a big reason I love working with her. She makes it easy to come to her, to ask for help, to make mistakes. Most head bosses these days are scary, I wouldn’t want to deal with them.
“Macie, accidentally almost stabbed me, if she wouldn’t of put the scissors down.” I tell her. ‘Accidentally’, I kinda fear that Macie would do it on purpose and just laugh afterwards. I mean she's not crazy, but with the things she says and does, makes me a little weary.
“Oh, damn. Be careful back there. I don’t want any death on my watch. “ She laughs. “Oh, do you want to go take your break?” I nod and turn around to go grab my purse.
“Excuse me, can I be let into a fitting room?” A customer asks right after I clock out.
“Of course.” I tell her and quickly unlock the door for her. As I go to turn around I hear my name. The voice sounded so familiar that it actually made me not want to turn around for a second.
“Ella Green. Honey, is that you?” I hear her say again. I turn around to see a face that I haven’t seen in almost 3 years. The face of the mother of the guy I fell in love with. The guy who broke my heart, who ruined my dreams. The mother of the guy who made me lie to everyone I care about.
“Nikki!”
“Oh my goodness. It’s been ages. How are you dear?” She asks while coming to give me a quick hug. Nikki always had the best hugs she always made you feel safe just by looking at her. When I left her son, I almost called her, because she would of known what to say, to make me feel better. But it’s her son, I didn’t want her to pick sides.
“I’m decent. How are you? The twins? Paddy? Dom? Tess?” I ask automatically missing them all, and thinking of all the great memories I had with them.
“I’m good. Everyone is good. Expect we all miss you. Especially Tess, she grew an attachment to you.” She made it hard to leave. Tess was honestly one of the best dogs I’ve ever met. When I first met her she automatically started loving me,they were all jealous at how fast I got her to like me.
“Aww, I miss her and all of you too. What you even doing here?” I ask moving her over towards the back counter to give us a little bit of privacy.
“Tom has an interview at a local high school today, so we decided to take a week off and explore the area, maybe get some cool pictures.”
There she goes, she said his name. I try not to think about him as an actual person. I see him more as whatever character he plays, because he is a very talented actor. I mean it’s not like I can just forget him, he plays one of my favorite Marvel characters Spider-Man. Plus my best friend loves him, and she talks about him all the time. I know she would probably cut it down if she actually knew what my history was with him but it’s something I promised to keep a secret, even though it means lying to my best friend and some family.
“Wow, at a local high school. I wonder which one. Oh, there's a park not too far from here that has a waterfall and during sunset and sunrise it looks so pretty, those might be good pictures.”
“Thank you, I will have to check that out. Actually why don’t you show me tonight. Come over for dinner, were staying the King’s Inn for the next couple of days. I know Tom would love to see you.” She invites.
“I would but, Tom and I didn’t really leave each other on the best terms. So seeing him wouldn’t be smart.”
“Nonsense, he missed you. He doesn’t say it but you can tell. When some of us read your book, we were surprised at how different it was. We wish it would of been published.” The book, the reason I actually met Tom in the first place. To write a biography on a celebrity, and then Writers of America would help edit and then it would be published. When I went to them to help edit the book, they changed everything. They made it seem like Tom was this big asshole who honestly never cared about anyone. They made up fake things to make the story more interesting. I couldn’t let them publish that, I mean Tom and I may of left things bad but he wasn’t anything those people were calling him. So I told them no, and they told me that I couldn’t get the scholarship then, and if anyone asked about me they would tell them that ‘I am a horrible student who doesn’t listen to anyone's rules.’ I think that's a big reason I didn’t even put it on my application.
“Why would you want it published, they were putting false lies about you guys in there. Why would you want lies published?”
“Ella,I know they had lies in the final product. In the beginning we didn’t though, actually in the beginning we were shocked. We thought we knew you better then that. I never would've believed that you would write such false things about us. But then I thought that kinda seemed odd, why would you want to lie.So I called the company and they came clean that they are the ones who changed everything. They even sent us a copy of the unedited version of your book. The book we love, and wish was published. We all read it and realized that this is the version we knew you would write, not some made up crap that company threw together.”
They actually told her they lied, I can’t believe they would actually own up to their lies.
“Did, um. Did Tom read it as well?” I ask looking down at my feet.
“No, I didn’t.” I hear. Tom, he’s here. How can I look up and see that face. The face that I fell in love with. The face that told me to ‘Get the hell out of my life and to never come back.’. I look up to see him wearing a classic grey t-shirt with his dark tan leather jacket, and his dark blue skinny jeans. His hair was shorter, probably from reshoot from his new movie Chaos Walking.
All in all, he looked so good.
“No, Ella. I didn’t read it. I didn’t want to read anything you ever wrote again.” Harsh.
“Thomas, don’t be rude.” Nikki snapped.
“Sorry. I did meet your old teacher Mrs. Jackson, she had nothing but good things to talk about you Ella.” Tom comments. Wait, his interview was at my old high school. Wow, he tells me to stay out of his life but he can come in go in mine as he pleases. He went to my old high school, he seen my old teacher. He’s here at my job. So, maybe I should tell him to get the hell out of my life. Yeah, that would show him. Damn it, Ella. Stop it, you don’t want him out of your life, if you wanted him out of your life you wouldn’t watch his movies and interviews, nor continue to follow his instagram and twitter.
“Well, spoiler. You know where I went to school now.”
“I’m sorry, but are you Tom Holland?” Macie interrupts.
“I am, and you are?’ He answers. He was always so polite with everyone, it was a big reason I fell in love with him.
“I’m Macie. Ella, you never told me you knew Tom Holland.” She whispers to me while smacking me in the arm over and over again.
“I didn’t know you knew who he was.” I explain while trying to move away from her, because she smacks hard.
“Of course I know who he is. I don’t live under a rock, you idiot. What I want to know is how you know him, your a nobody. No offense.” Hmm, I wonder why I didn’t like her. Maybe it's because she likes insulting people every chance she gets.
“ Actually, I don’t really know him. It was nice seeing you again Nikki. Now if you could excuse me.” I explained. Then started to head over to the cabinet to grab my purse.
“Ella, wait. Could I actually have a word with you?” Tom asks while moving away from Macie who was standing way to close to him for anyone's comfort.
“What, Tom. I really don’t have time for this.”
“Mrs. Jackson did tell me some things that happen once you came home. I wanted to talk to you about them.” He offers.
“If you wanted to talk to me about anything that happened in my life, you wouldn’t of told me to get out of your life and to never come back. So no Tom. I don’t want to talk about what happened, because it is none of your goddamn business.” I snap at him. How dare he, how dare he think that after all this time I would be up to talk about anything with him. He doesn’t get to know what happened once I left Atlanta. He doesn’t get to know anything about me anymore.
“Ella, please.” He begs.
“Why should I talk to you when you won’t even read what I actually wrote instead of believing what that dumb company said about you. Once you actually read that, then maybe I’ll consider talking to you.”
“Wait, you write?’ Macie asks. When did she get here, last I checked she was talking to Nikki about something.
“Not anymore.” I reply. “Goodbye Tom.” I then grab my purse and walk to the back room to take my break.
After 3 years, I never would of expected Tom to come here, to do an interview at my old high school. To try and actually talk to me. To have Nikki know the real truth, hell most of her family know the real truth. If only Tom knew, that’s all I could want. Is for Tom to finally see the real and honest truth. That iI could never write those horrible lies about him, because I love him. And not publishing the book, what it did to me and my life. But maybe he’ll never know.
If you would like to be added to a tagging list please let me know.
#tom holland#tom holland fanfiction#fanfic#biography#love#hate#sadness#nikki holland#writing#reading
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(Sci Fi) My character was part of a group trying to pull down an organization performing some non-ethical experiments on her species, in order to fit in and not be discovered she had to help with the experiments, as well as spread and repeat hateful propganda against her own kind. The first trial killed all the inital victims, so she gave up information that would refine the procedure and make it non-lethal. Eventually she gets in over her head and is discovered 1/2
sci fi) she is then blackmailed by the human discoverer to further the experiments. I don't want to seem like I'm sympathizing with a torturer, but is she also a victim in this? She shows a lot of guilt and regret over what happened, to the point of thinking she doesn't deserve to live when so many suffered because of what she did. 2/3 (I misjudged sorry!)(sci fi) I also don't want to seem like the message of this character is 'torture is ok', so I'm not sure whether it's ok for her to be forgiven in the end. I've done some reading of my own, but I'm getting conflicting information. Thank you so much for this! 3/3
I spent an hour and a half writing a 1K word response this morning andthen realised I’d possibly misinterpreted the question.
I’m unclear on whether you’re asking about one character or two andsince I’ve already written out a response to one of those scenarios- I thinkI’m going to write a response to other as well and post both.
The first response is assuming that the ask is focused on a secondcharacter blackmailing but later working with the non-human victim.
The second response is assuming that the victim here is the non-humancharacter and that she later complies with torturers and assists them underthreat.
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From what you’ve said I don’t think that this story is going to end upsuggesting torture is OK.
You’ve got a victim complying, partly because she’s under pressure butpartly because she has a way to prevent others around her dying. You’ve alsogot a torturer coming to regret her actions. I don’t think there’s anythingwrong or apologist in either circumstance.
As for forgiveness and who ‘deserves’ it- I think that’s a very personal thing.
I don’t think victims should ever be pressured to forgive their abusersbut that doesn’t mean some of them wouldn’t anyway.
You’re probably aware that much of the Middle East has the deathpenalty. You might not be aware that in many of those countries there’s also alegal provision for the death penalty to be commuted if the victims or thevictims’ families forgive the criminal. A few years ago there was a video fromIran that went round of a convicted murderer who was literally just about to behanged. The mother of his victim stormed up to the scaffold and tore the nooseoff his neck.
She also slapped him.
These laws have been abused and they’re not always applied in fair ways.But I’ve always rather liked the idea of forgiveness being written into thelaw.
I’m trying to focus on the victim here because really I don’t think itmatters if we forgive a torturer. Ifyou weren’t their victim then the idea of ‘forgiving’ a torturer seems rathernonsensical to me.
And I think that’s the best way to approach it in the story. Set theoverall narrative aside for the moment: does the victim forgive her?
Because that is possible. I’ve never seen a statistical analysis of itbut my instinct from the anecdotal accounts I’ve read is that it’s rare.
But it is possible. At leastone of the survivors interviewed in Monroe’s A Darkling Plain forgave the people who’d tormented her and herfamily. This stood in pretty stark contrast to the account of another womanwho’d survived the same atrocity and very much didn’t forgive anyone.
There are a couple of things I’d caution about when writing this. One isthat I think you should be very careful not to imply that victims must forgive their abusers. That’s anunfortunately common message and it isn’t particularly helpful to survivors,whether they want to forgive someone or not.
The other is that I think it would be very easy to accidentally implythis is a common response when it isn’t. I’d suggest working in the opinions ofother survivors if you can. They don’t have to be shown as aggressive orantagonistic towards the former torturer, in fact I’d say the most commonresponse is simply not wanting to be anywhere near them.
But I think the narrative would probably benefit if you showed that notevery victim is going to be forgiving and thatthat’s OK.
Which leaves me with the question of victimhood and sympathy.
Honestly? It sounds like you aresympathising with this torturer character a lot. I don’t think there’s anythingwrong with that because as a writer you’re probably pretty deep inside herhead. There’s a degree to which it’s natural that we sympathise with ourcharacters however horrible they are.
Don’t feel guilty for understanding a character deeply. That’s part ofwhat makes good writing.
I don’t think she’s a victimthough.
From everything you’ve said here this character had a pretty clearchoice. There’s no indication she was under threat or duress. As far as I cantell from what you’ve said she took a job that at some point changed so thatshe was required to torture other sentient beings.
She could have quit. She could have left. She could have transferred.She could have done dozens of things to take herself out of that situation.
Instead she chose to torture.
And it sounds as if she did so simply because she was told to and itwould have been personally inconvenient to resist.
That says rather a lot about her character.
Have you heard of Chiune Sugihara? He was vice-consul at the JapaneseConsulate in Lithuania during the lead up to World War 2.
Jewish people from Poland fled into Lithuania and, with Lithuania’sconsiderable Jewish population that meant quite a lot of people in the countrydesperately trying to leave ahead of an invading force that wanted them dead.
Sugihara contacted his superiors in Tokyo and they told him prettyfirmly that most of the refugees didn’t meet visa requirements. Sugihara gavethem visas anyway.
He hand wrote official documents for up to 20 hours a day and reportedlythrew blank (but signed) visa papers from the window of his departing trainwhen his superiors ordered him to leave.
This was career suicide. Sugihara lost his job and ended up doing menialwork to support his family.
He saved an estimated six thousand people.
We always have a choice.
Some torturers are also victims of torture. Butif we’re going down that route then a hugenumber of violent far right terrorists were victims of child abuse. Theresearch in that New Scientist article strongly suggests that these people wereviolent before joining hate groups.The ‘ideology’ provides a handy excuse for violent behaviour that was alreadythere.
Abuse doesn’t make people violent and it doesn’t excuse violence. Thefact that so many of these people werevictims does not absolve them from blame when they victimise others. Suggestingthat it does undermines the agency of survivors and supports the unfortunatestereotype of abuse making victims violent.
To be honest even if you’d told me that this torturer character wasthreatened with torture and death unless she complied I’d still have emphasised that she chose to comply.
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Much of what I’ve said before still applies if the ask is only about onecharacter.
I still don’t think there’sanything in the scenario to suggest torture is OK.
There’s also quite a lot of scope to highlight the way torture doesn’t produce obedience even thoughthe character is complying with torturers. That’s because she seems to beprimarily motivated by saving the lives of others. The one major incident ofcompliance you’ve told me about saves a lot of people.
I think so long as you emphasise her motivations you should be alright.Because initially at least she isn’tstrongly motivated by the threat of torture, she’s motivated by how she can useher position close to the torturers to assist their victims.
And this does leave a prettycomplex situation where you have someone who was in some ways a victim and inothers an abuser.
I think much of what I’ve said about forgiveness and choice in theprevious answer still applies. She couldhave chosen to refuse or resist even when afraid for her life. People have anddo refuse or resist in similar situations, even when it means their death.
I think that once again comes back to the concept of a strongly heldbelief.
If you’ve been following the blog for a while you’ll know I’m fond ofstressing the fact that torture can’tchange strongly held beliefs or force people to act against them.
But the definition of what’s ‘strongly held’ is nebulous. What someoneis actually willing to die for isn’t always…necessarily what culture andsociety tells us we ‘should’ sacrifice for.
It’s obvious why the character feels guilty. I think it would be normalfor her to want the forgiveness ofthe people around her, and for her to feel suicidal. But it’s also important torealise that most of the people who were victimised probably won’t forgive her.And that isn’t a flaw on their part, it’s part of the antagonism torturenaturally produces.
I think that when we’re writing complex situations like this the idea ofhow we apportion or assign blame isn’t always helpful.
It’s possible for someone in real life to be a victim in some contextsand an abuser in others. One doesn’t negate the other and I think we do a verypoor job of accepting the reality of both.
That means that trying to work out these complicated situations infiction is incredibly important.
I’ve made a couple of attempts myself. The way I tend to approach it is,again, very much on an individual level. Because I think when we write a narrative suggesting a particularoutcome or attitude is best that sends a very particular message to a reader.Whereas if you have a narrative that shows you how different people see thischaracter the reader ends up with several versions of her and they need tothink through which interpretation they agree with.
I wrote an exchange recently between two characters of similar ages. Inthe setting the older generation had an extremely bloody civil war and both ofthese characters had grown up very close to adults who were responsible foratrocities. They talked about the difficult they felt balancing the awfulthings they knew their parental figures had done with the fact that bothparental figures had been very good to them as individuals.
It’s an important conversation, one that I think we’re sorely lackingright now. The way we deal with the idea that people who were good to us personally may have been absolutelyawful to other people.
This character probably feels helpless and trapped. She probablyjustifies her actions to herself by saying she had to, she was forced to. Andthe flip side is she’s also saved lives.
There’s more than one way to handle this. Letting the characters individuallyweigh up her actions is how I would do it, but it’s not necessarily ‘the rightway’, just one of several.
I think so long as you show both sides of what she does, withoutglossing over the good or the bad aspects you should be alright. Readers candecide for themselves whether they want to sympathise with her or not andwhether they want to see her forgiven or not.
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And I think I’m going to leave that there.
I hope it helps. :)
Disclaimer
#tw torture#unethical experimentation#consent#compliance#writing victims#writing torturers#forgiveness#Anonymous
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Hi Neighbor
Hello! I'm back with another scenario finally after another round of just posting moodboards! I also did include a pet cat in here so if you're a dog person I'm sorry! I love cats kskxnsozjs but people see me as a dog person sad sad. W.E I love them both ♡
✿ Seventeen The8 x Gender Neutral Reader ✿ Fluff ✿ 1.7k words ✿ Not Requested ✿ Chii
PSA: If you requested something please give us 2-3 weeks! We’re both in school and busy with personal things! I don’t wanna sound annoying but be patient! Thank you! I make make a wip post where I’ll update the wips I’m working on if that helps!
I made the following divider so please don’t take it or use in your own posts, thank you .- Chii
There was an absolutely wonderful opening for the Friday night shift at work and with rent coming up, you knew you needed the extra cash. It was always a normal occurrence that Friday has the least amount of workers, next to the weekend. You picked up the black marker and wrote your name on the whiteboard inside the employee office. Marking your name down, you made up a plan in your head to prepare yourself for working two shifts within 24 hours. Gathering your things, you checked the time on your phone that had been locked up. 7:34 pm, you still had time to eat a quick meal and sleep before you dealt with an afternoon and night shift back to back. You luckily had four breaks in those two shifts but it was hard to take naps with noise constantly around you.
“Bye, Y/N. See you tomorrow!” Said one of the older workers there, you waved them a goodbye before walking out of the building. As your shoes crunched against the fallen leaves and the wind hit your skin, you walked to your stop. You fished out a pair of earbuds and plugged them into your phone as you waited for the bus.
On the 15 minute ride home, your plan started to come together. You would order some delivery and pay with your debit card over the phone to save the trouble of paying with cash. You would take a shower within the 45 minute window it usually took for your delivery to come and eat before sleeping by 10 AM. You turned the white corridor lined with dark doors to stop in front of the one you called home. You felt up your pockets for your keys. Finally feeling the jagged edge of metal against your fingers you pulled it out, the jingling sound was the only other sound besides the voices you could hear from next door. You recently got a new neighbor, the old one had moved due to work relocation. It was such a shame, you two had been close and it was hard to adjust to a new neighbor, Minghao is his name if you weren't mistaken. You barely said anything to him since he moved in last week. A few greetings here and there were exchanged between the two of you. You only knew his name because of mail being accidentally put into your box day after day. You thought back to a few days ago, around two days after he moved in. He caught you while coming home in your work attire, that day you had been especially tired and it showed in your appearance.
It only consisted of him saying “hey neighbor,” before he walked into his apartment and his three friends followed. You were worried about the noise factor but to your pleasant surprise you could hear him tell them to quiet down every time they got loud. You enter your home but not before stealing a glance over to Minghao’s door, hearing muffled voices.
‘Maybe he has friends over again,’ you thought to yourself before pushing the dark door in. You felt a fluffy tail around your ankles as soon as you stepped through the door.
“Hey, Cece.” You bent down to pet the white and gray cat on the ground. She started to walk off to god knows where while you took off your coat and shoes. You called in your order and paid, finally being able to enjoy a hot shower after a long day. You took your time under the hot water, letting it relax your tense muscles. The steam filled the tile bathroom and you looked down to your hands, red due to the hot water. You heard a female voice that interrupt your thoughts through the walls. The walls were thin but not that thin, it took a lot to hear someone talking from another apartment. You got out of the shower after that, you had been in there way too long anyway. Your noticed your prune like fingers while you changed into a fresh change of clothes. The doorbell rang just when you exited the steamy bathroom and prepared the cash tip.
You thanked the delivery man and gave him a tip and sat down at your coffee table. Opening the bag, you took out it's contents. You saw Cece making her way towards you. Getting up, you lifted her into the couch and she turned a few times before getting comfortable. Came that time of the night to look for a show to watch while you ate. Although, once you did it was nearly impossible to enjoy your T.V show in peace. The voices next door got louder and louder. You wanted to shut them out and ignore it as white noise but you could make out every word they were shouting. Disregarding your damp hair and your cat meowing for you to not leave again, your hand turned the handle to your front door. You slipped on a pair of slide on slippers and walked the short distance to Minghao’s door. You took a deep breath before knocking, what were you going to say? Stop yelling? Regardless, you knocked and waited for him to answer. To your surprise the door opened quickly, you saw the angry looking girl behind Minghao. You assumed this was the loud female voice you heard while trying to relax in the shower. She looked angry and was red in the face, you saw tears streaming down her face with bits of mascara. You blinked rapidly and tore your eyes away from her, not wanting to make awkward eye contact.
Looking at Minghao, you began to speak, “hey, I’m-mh?!”
‘Hey, I'm your neighbor from next door. I know you just moved in and all but I have a night shift in 4 hours and I would appreciate if you kept the noise down,’ is what you wanted to say if it wasn't for his lips pressing against yours but you weren't complaining. They felt smooth and plush, unlike your own that was dry from not applying lip balm after coming out of the shower. You saw no point in it, you were going to eat right after but in this moment you wish you did. He held onto your body as you practically melted. You have never been kissed like this before with your luck in men. They didn't kiss you like Minghao did. They wouldn’t be able to kiss you like Minghao did. He pulled away, staring into your eyes before leaning towards your ear.
“I know this looks bad but play along and I'll explain everything later.” His breath tickled your neck and caused your cheeks to flush.
“U-uh sure…” You could barely say anything since you were still in shock from the kiss. He interlocked your fingers together and stepped away so you could see the girl in your sight again. She was just as shocked as you were.
“This is the girl you keep saying doesn't exist.” Minghao said while motioning over to you.
“So you’re the one, huh?” Her voice was just as loud as before but it was slightly brittle.
“Uh,” you felt Minghao’s fingers tighten around your hand, “yea! We’ve been seeing each other.” You saw the anger in her eyes and felt scared, like she was about to attack you. She start to walk towards you but Minghao let your hand go and stood in front of you.
“I think it's time for you to go.” Minghao said calmly, trying to be the bigger person in this situation.
“This isn't over!” She screamed louder than before.
“Yes it is.”
“Ugh!” The girl stomped out of his apartment but not before slamming his front door so loud that you heard your cat meow from the wall.
“I should be expecting a call from the landlord in a day shouldn't I?” Minghao crouched down and rubbed the back of his neck.
“Most likely.” You crouched down to be eye level with him. He pick up a fallen pillow and threw it back in the couch.
“About before, I'm sorry.” He looked at you apologetically.
“It’s fine, a nasty ex?” You said.
“Now she is.” He said blandly.
“Oh, I'm sorry.” You said quickly after, not really knowing to comfort him but he didn't seem to mind that he just broke up with his girlfriend.
“It’s alright, we got into our 9th argument this week and I expected this to come.” He got up and started to fix up the rest of apartment.
“Do you want help cleaning up?” You asked him, figuring it would be weird to just leave after that and you wanted to speed up the process so you didn't have to hear cluttering while in bed.
“That would be amazing, thank you…” His voice trailed off.
“Y/N, I live next door.” You pointed to the left wall of his apartment.
“Ah, you always bring my mail over to me.” He nodded his head at remembering your morning attire and half awake face when you would drop off the said mail.
“So,” you paused before continuing to pick up the Chinese fashion magazines,” do you always kiss your new neighbors?” You said after you put them on his coffee table.
“Why? Want it to happen again?” He turned to you to saw your face flush a deeper red. He tried to hold back a smile.
“How about I take you in a date first? We’ll see if everything plays out well and I'll kiss you again.”
“Date? Wait! My take out! Ah, it's probably room temperature by now.” You suddenly remembered your food and sighed, you didn't want to use the microwave since it was half your age, a ‘goodbye present’ from your parents.
“I’m sorry about that, you could use my microwave if you want to. It's brand new.” He offered up his kitchen to your use and pat the top of the microwave.
“You just saved me from my old rickety microwave.” You sighed happily.
“You saved me from my ex, it's the least I can do.”
You spend the next hour continuing to help Minghao with his apartment and ate at his place also. You introduced him to your ragdoll cat and Cece loved him, so did you. Maybe love is a strong word but you are definitely attracted to him now. Usually you kiss after two people get together but a change up in the order makes it interesting.
“I still have my night shift….”
I HAD THIS WIP FOR 5 DAYS AND THATS THE QUICKEST i’VE EVER FINISHED, MODIFIED AND EDITED ANYTHING. I like this little prompt so I worked with it and it’s not bad! :o Until next time!
Please don’t claim this as your own and please don’t do anything with it without my permission. If you don’t want it happening to you, don’t do it to others.
#seventeen#minghao#the8#seventeen scenarios#seventeen imagines#seventeen fluff#minghao scenarios#minghao imagines#minghao fluff#the8 scenarios#the8 imagines#the8 fluff#minghao x reader#the8 x reader#chii
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My fondest memories
How many days have you had in your life that you will able to have again? Spoiler:none. You could have a day that’s similar, a moment that’s quite close. Truth is, you will never ever get the same opportunity for a moment again. I am only sixteen, and i hopefully have a long long time left on earth yet, but the amount of memories you can gain in the first sixteen years of your life is crazy really. Everyone says that your school days are your best days, and you don’t believe them when you’re in school. I literally left school nine months ago and already i realise what everyone was talking about. It really, really was amazing, thinking about it. If you’re still in school, or even if you’ve left school like me really, just please try and make sure to make the most of everything you do. Spend time doing things and try and have the most fun doing whatever you’re doing because the memories you will get from even the littlest things will be worth it. Maybe i’m just really sentimental or maybe i’m right, but i recommend you do.
These are my fondest memories:) don’t read it if you don’t want, i just wanted to reminisce lol.
I will never get back the days in reception where we danced around with our teacher Lucy to the Woohoo song.
I will never get back the days i used to spend my lunchtimes inside with my brother’s form tutor and asking her about how he was doing in school. *cringe* I will never get back that day me and my friend were sat in her room playing with our polly pockets and she had a big cruise ship that we wanted to make a sea for and ended up tipping water all over the carpet and crying to her mum that we were really sorry. I will never get back those days it was snowing and me and my brother got sent to my mum’s work nextdoor from school and just sat eating biscuits and putting lunches in brown paper bags. I will never get back that day where me, my brother and two of my cousins were playing ‘peter pan’, i whacked my teeth with the ladder of a bunk bed and we accidentally turned on the shower whilst inside it when hiding from captain hook and smee. I will never get back the time me and my friend wrote a book about me and her finding kittens in a box and taking them to someone who definitely wasn’t our teacher - who was called mr moggy - and we ended up getting a big house together with loads of pets that we listed at the start of the book. I will never get back those days where me, my dad and my brother rode our bikes through the woods and all the way to a shop on the other side where we brought little snap pots of squash. I will never get back those times me and my brother used to pretend we were gladiators on that show on the slide in my garden. He was always the fire king and had electrical powers (because logic) and i was the ice queen, which was probably something to do with the fact we spent most of our time sat on our dining chairs at the big computer playing fireboy and watergirl or papa’s pizzeria. I will never get back those days where me and my friend played in her shed that we thought was really cool because it had two floors, or when we made up a dance to the song “Hot n’ Cold” (that honestly is so vivid in my memory that i could probably do it for you right now) to show our mums.
I will never get back those sad, sad days i used to create bedrooms on girlsgogames on ‘my new room 2′ (i didn’t like the original or number 3) or look through the argos catalog for things to put in the bedrooms for the family i created for no specific reason that i can definitely still name now, and literally exactly what they looked like. I will never get back those times in primary school that i played games i didn’t understand with my friend and we tried to figure out what monsters lived in the grate in the playground. I will never get back those days i used to stand on the bench in my garden and talk to my nextdoor neighbour every single day after school and on weekends and we would sit upstairs in the rooms that were closest to eachother and try our hardest to get our nintendo ds’s to connect so we could pictochat.
I will never get back the summer where i turned eleven and got my first phone, a white T-mobile unity that i had a green penguin case on that was intended for a blackberry phone. I had Now that’s what i call music 82 downloaded onto it, a shedload of awful selfies when my side fringe was just starting out, and i wrote fanfictions in my notes. Cool. I will never get back those days where me and my new high school friends used to pretend we were doing music practice at lunch and instead just ate out lunch and sang along to the only song we knew how to play the chords to on a keyboard. I will never get back those days me, my boyfriend and his annoying little follow-along friend used to get kicked out of the little outside bit by our form, and the countless times we used to stand and flirt while his friend complained about it.
I will never get back those days i used to go out to the field with my friend and her big photography camera and take photos for a project we invented for ourselves that currently remains incomplete. It was a book about two females who were together called Madison and Annabelle who were writing to eachother after getting split up during the holocaust. Sounds like a really fun project for two thirteen year olds lol. We slept around her house, had countless chinese meals and played with her kittens.
I will never get back the days where me and my best friend made videostars. The first one we did was last night by the vamps and we had her ipod resting against her tv while one of us tapped the record button and the other one was in shot. Id go through all the songs but there is a fuckton.
I will never get back the day when my best friend’s mum and dad got married and me and some of my best friends spent the night in cute little party dresses trying to inhale helium from the party balloons and doing ‘the jellyfish dance’ and ‘i am the music man’ on the dance floor. I will never get back those times we had triple history on a wednesday and i was just always so excited to see my new friend and current crush and not learn anything at all. I sat behind him in lesson and in one of the first ones i stuck a glue stick to the back of his elbow and he and my lovely, lovely teacher made me promise to buy him an indian takeaway to say sorry for doing so. (Who knew that was how you get a best friend??)
I will never get back the dance/school shows we did for maybe three nights in a row each year that we spent the first half of the year practicing for, sitting upstairs - or in the really early days, sitting in the canteen - with the other dancers, actors and ‘voices’ panicking over a spare line up sheet about getting dressed and putting stage makeup on in time before we had to go on stage again. We ordered a pizza from dominoes most years. The one in this year was one of the last ones i did and a group of us, including two of the main actors who me and my best mate thought were really cool, were sat on the floor in the corridor before we went on stage playing truth or dare and asking eachother silly questions. One of the dares was for my friend to give me a piggyback but on his shoulders, and he dropped me when i was up there and i landed on like a cement floor straight on my coccyx, and then had to do two dances after that. It was then a running joke between me and him that he had ‘broke my arse’. I will never get back those last moments with my dad at christmas when we played i spy because that was all he could understand, or on new years night when i lay next to him in bed and we watched alan carr until it hit midnight, or when we were eating biscuits in the hospice and he was laughing at himself because they were “o” shaped. I will never get back that moment i had my first kiss i had with my boyfriend or those four months over the summer period with my completely new (and improved) friend group and the day we went to the park and my best friend fell in the mud, we all tried to fit on a spinny thing, and we watched tangled, the day of our friends birthday when we went to the cinema and all lay on the trampoline at his house, my birthday that year. I will never get back the first house party i went to (which is perhaps a good thing to be completely honest), or the second one, or the third one, which was also the first time i got drunk and told my best friend she couldn’t sleep because she had hiccups, drunk texted my other best friend and then attempted to help my best friend when she threw up basically a whole bottle of bright orange caribbean twist on a white carpet. I will never get back those lunchtimes every day where we sat underneath our tree (the one inbetween the year 8 tree and the smoking weed tree) on the field or on the first and seconds benches in the maths corridor and pissed about, made our own olympics and attempted to play rugby. There are waaaaay too many memories to list about lunch and breaktimes. I will ever get back those last few days of school where we spent every lesson with our phones out and taking photos together or signing eachothers yearbooks rather than revising, and the fact i came home from school two or three hours late every day because i spent my time revising or doing dance practice. I will never get back my prom, one of the best moments of my life, to be honest, where i just saw all the people i had grown up with looking absolutely gorgeous and all dancing together and just not having a care in the world. Honestly, i wouldn’t have chosen to grow up with any different people. It is both amazing and emotional to think about both myself, and all the other amazing people in school growing up alongside eachother and shaping into who we are today.
Here’t to 16 more years of memories ay.
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Here’s an essay I had to write for English. Enjoy.
Hero Essay
“In a world. . .
With no bravery. . .
There is only one who can save us. . .”
*queue dramatic music*
“BRAVEMAN! The man who is brave!”
The TV screen illuminated the dark room. My sister, sitting on the couch with a book in hand, scoffs at me.
“You’re watching Braveman again? You know that’s not real. No one could ever be like that. ‘Bravery’ or whatever isn’t real.”
“It’s a good movie,” I say. “Dad likes it.”
“Yeah well I think it’s stupid,” she rolls her eyes. “Why don’t you read something? Something real? Like the encyclopedias. You haven’t even gotten to the letter K yet.”
I shake my head and turn back to the screen. I watch as Braveman speaks in front of a group of people and talks to strangers he doesn’t know. The thought of speaking to someone outside of my family is. . . horrifying. How does someone do that? Shaking someone’s hand? Being where everyone can see you? I wished and longed to have his powers. I glanced back at my sister. She was right. Bravery isn’t real. There’s no way I could be brave.
I woke up curled up on the floor. The credits to Braveman were scrolling on the TV. I must have fallen asleep. I looked back at the couch. It was empty.
“Must’ve gone to bed,” I mumbled to myself. “I should do the same.” I started to turn off the TV when I accidentally hit the channel button, redirecting me to the new channel. I started to slide my hand to the correct button when something caught my attention.
“We have decided it would be best for us as a community if we returned to traditions from before the epidemic of 2020.” My eyes widened. Was this really what I was hearing? I turned it up to be sure. The computer-reporter began again, “Beginning the first of August, our community will go back to having in-person schooling and work programs, and social interaction will be restored.”
I felt my jaw drop. 2020? That was the year my grandma was born! I thought. We’re going back to a lifestyle from over 70 years ago? I ran to my parents room.
“Mom! Dad! Check out the news!” I yelled as I burst into their room and woke them up. “Turn on the TV! Turn it on!”
“Gosh, Olivia!” My mom said. “You almost scared the life out of me!” She sat up and rubbed her eyes. “What’s so important?” I suddenly realized how rude I had been.
“I’m sorry,” I started to back out of the room. “Maybe it’s not that important.” My dad grabbed the remote and clicked on the TV. The news was still going.
“There have been many studies over the past 10-15 years about the pros and cons of social interaction. Although keeping to yourself was once very needed to prevent the spread of a deadly virus, our recent studies have shown that being around people is crucial for healthy development of the brain.”
“What is this?” my mom interrupted. “Are we supposed to believe -”
“Shh.” my dad quieted her. He had a very serious look on his face.
“What do you mean shh? I have-”
“Shhh!” he insisted. My mom stared at him in disbelief. I watched as his face changed from serious and confused to shocked and surprised.
“Ever since 2020, our medication has provided our brains the stimulation we need, but recent studies have shown that actual social interaction is far more effective and will save millions of dollars every year.”
I think of the pill that our entire family takes everyday. It’s always been so routine, I’ve never questioned it.
“It’s good for your brain.” I recall my dad telling me once. “Take it every morning and you’ll be good to go.” That was always enough of an explanation for me. I never knew it was to replace something we were lacking.
As my mom began to realize what was going on, she began to look terrified. My dad also looked scared. But for some reason, I wasn’t scared. I felt. . . excited? I didn’t know what I was feeling. It wasn’t fear. It wasn’t bad at all. It was something I had never felt before. . .
It has been 3 months since I saw the news about returning to an old lifestyle. 4 days until the first of August. Pretty much everything on TV has been about this lifestyle. Real people have been on TV recently instead of the typical computer-voice. They stutter and their hands shake. I can’t imagine how scary being in front of a camera would be, nonetheless one where the entire country - maybe the entire world - sees you.
We have been given study materials on the old lifestyle. It’s mostly made up of pictures from old, traditional classrooms where there were over 20 students in one room at once. That blew my mind. The most people I’ve ever been in a room with at once is 5. And that’s a lot for someone my age. There were pictures of the once-busy streets of New York, the area flooded with cars and people. I knew life was different 70 years ago, but I had never known about any of this. The only history we had been taught was that there was a disease that led to a safer community where everyone stayed at home. That’s all that I’ve ever known. That’s how I grew up. That’s how my parents grew up. And that’s how their parents grew up. My deceased grandpa, who was 8 in 2020, was the last one in my family that could’ve remembered anything from the old lifestyle, but he’s gone.
As soon as it was decided to stay indoors, anything about being out of our houses was taken out of the education system in order to make sure everyone lived indoors. Food and medication was delivered to houses. Everyone worked from home. Now, the people who once wrote at-home curriculum would become teachers. Those who helped develop medications and prepared diets designed specifically for every person would become doctors. Anyone who was still in school would remain a student, but attend school with everyone else.
I was going into my junior year and my sister was going into her senior year. She was terrified. She broke down in tears and my parents had to order a special medication to calm her down. I, however, was not scared. I didn’t know what I was. As I thought this over, the movie Braveman flashed through my head. Brave? I thought. Am I. . . brave? I thought of the feeling inside of me. I wanted to go to school. I was excited to see the streets filled with people. But I remembered what my sister told me. No. I told myself. I can’t be brave. Brave isn’t real.
I woke up to the sun shining through my window. The blinds used to always be closed, but I’ve been keeping them open to get used to the sunlight. It was bright and warm, it felt unnatural. . . even though it was the only natural light there was. I put on the new clothing that had been delivered to my house yesterday morning. Jeans, tall black socks, a blue polo shirt, and a new pair of shoes. My sister had a similar outfit, but a yellow shirt. There was also a care-package sent for all of us. On the outside of the box, there was a list that read:
Contents:
1 girl’s junior school outfit - Olivia
1 girl’s senior school outfit - Chelsea
2 backpacks (includes laptop, notebook, and 2 pencils each)
1 women's work attire - Victoria
1 men’s work attire - Ben
4 nametags - Ben, Victoria, Chelsea, Olivia
4 personal cell phone
4 instruction guides
4 personal sunscreen bottles - prolonged sun exposure may cause irritation. Please apply every 2 hours to avoid sunburn
1 anxiety pill - Chelsea
4 medication pills - THIS IS YOUR LAST DOSAGE
I got dressed and applied the sunscreen. Whatever a sunburn was did not sound pleasing. The sunscreen was oily and greasy but it smelled nice. I dropped the pill into my palm and took a deep breath. For some reason knowing this was the last one was. . . relieving, almost. I had a good feeling about today. I popped my head back and swallowed it, feeling it as it made its way down my throat.
“The bus is here!” my mom shouted from across the house. I slid the sunscreen into my pocket, grabbed my instruction book and tossed it in my bag, threw the bag over my shoulders, and ran to the door. My sister came out of her room with a worried expression on her face. I stopped and turned around towards her.
“Hey, it’ll be okay.” I reassured her. She tried to smile at me, but I could tell she was still upset. I skipped through the door and smiled big at my dad.
“Excited?” he asked.
“Yeah!” I said quickly, maybe a little too quickly based on the shocked expression on his face.
“Well that’s good!” he said and he straightened his tie. “Let’s hope today goes well. . .” I could hear the uncertainty in his voice.
I got to the door of the bus and it slid open. I took a deep breath and stepped on, my dad trailing shortly behind me. There were 2 other families on the bus. I swallowed deep and I walked through the aisle, glancing at the other people on the bus. There was another girl with a blue shirt on and I smiled at her. She looked at the ground. I thought back to the instruction book. Seat B3. I remembered. I found it, sat down quickly, and eagerly tapped my foot, waiting for the bus to move. When the rest of my family was seated, we began to roll forward. My sister had the window seat, but she slumped her head down and looked at her feet. I looked past her to see the amazing outside world, the sun shining through the tinted glass.
“Passengers,” the auto-driver’s robotic voice said, “welcome to your first day of our social lifestyle. If at any point you need help, please address your handbook or simply select the blue application on your new cell phones.”
I remembered my cell phone in my pocket. My family’s contact information accessible in the yellow application, my personal information in the red application, and help from a government official in the blue application. I glanced over at my mom who was worryingly flipping through her instruction book. My dad was looking out the window like I was, with a pleasant expression on his face. My sister was still slumped in her seat, looking at her shoes. She looked up at me and I smiled at her. I watched her close her eyes, take a deep breath, and smile at me too, this time more genuine.
The bus came to a slow stop.
“Students attending freshman, sophomore, junior, and senior year, this is your destination.”
I stood up excitedly and looked at my parents. My mom cracked a wry smile at me and my dad waved me goodbye. I smiled big and walked to the front of the bus, my sister slowly trailing behind me, along with the rest of the nervous children about to go to school.
I stepped off the steps of the bus and looked up at the large building in front of me. GRANDBURY HIGH SCHOOL was carved into the front of the large, stone entrance. The students gathering in a group behind me were also gazing at the building we had never seen before. I glanced at the girl with the blue shirt and read her name tag. “REBECCA JONES”, it read. Rebecca. I thought. I’m gonna try to be friends with Rebecca. I decided. She realized I was looking at her so I tried smiling at her again. Slowly, a small smile formed on her face. She began to walk forward, so I followed.
There were kiosks set up for us to check in. I walked up to one and scanned my nametag. It buffered for a second then displayed a message. WELCOME, OLIVIA BARREN. PLEASE REPORT TO ROOM 127 - ENGLISH. A map showed the school hallways, with a green line leading me down the hallway to the right. The phone in my pocket began to vibrate, so I pulled it out of my pocket. The screen lit up with the map displaying on the kiosk. I followed the green line displayed on my phone until I reached room 127.
I walked into the room. There were already a few students sitting in their seats. We were all wearing a blue shirt, except for one lady at the front of the room who was wearing a maroon shirt. Must be the teacher. I thought to myself. I walked through the aisles of desks until I found my name. OLIVIA B it read on the tiny screen on the corner of the desk. I hung my backpack on the hook on the back of the chair, and sat down, then remembered what I had read in the instruction book. I scanned my name tag. The screen glowed green, indicating I had been marked as present.
The room began to fill up, but it remained silent. Everyone kept their eyes low, even the teacher. I watched Rebecca walk in, but she didn’t see me. When everyone’s desks had green glowing where their names were, the teacher stood at the center of the front of the room and cleared her throat.
“Hello, class.” she was sweating and her hands were shaky, but she took a deep breath and continued. “Uhh...I am Ms.Greene.” I felt like chuckling at her silly color name, but I refrained. “I will be teaching english. This will be the first class you will report to every morning.” She paused and collected her thoughts. She cleared her throat again. “Is, uh, is there anyone who would like to introduce themselves?”
Somehow the silence became even quieter. Everyone was stiff in their seats, staring at their desks. The only thing you could hear was the tapping of my foot, which was rapidly speeding up. Everyone sat there for what seemed like forever. Ms.Greene stared at her feet and waited for anything to happen.
The feeling inside of me that I had been feeling all day grew even larger. Scenes from Braveman flashed in my head. Talking in front of people. Shaking hands. Being brave. This. I thought, but it felt more like I was screaming in my head. This is it. This is your chance. Your chance to be brave. I took a deep breath and I clutched the edge of my desk. What are you waiting for? I continued to hold still. What are you waiting for?!
Suddenly, I stood up. The entire class stared at me. My teacher looked startled and terrified. Rebecca looked at me with her mouth agape. The kid next to me looked as if he had seen a ghost.
“My name is Olivia,” I say. “Olivia Barren.” I look around the room and a strange, proud happiness fills me. “It’s nice to meet all of you.” I smile big and sit back down.
That was it. I thought. That was bravery.
#writing#my writing#covidー19#coronavirus#quarantine#dystopia#happy ending#creative#hero#heroine#bravery#the future
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Somewhere In My Sleep Part 6 (Kyungsoo Series)
(1) (2) (3) (4) (5) (6) Mini Masterlist
Author: @julietsoddeye AU: Cannon/EXO Universe Genre: Fantasy | Fluff | Smut | Angst Pairing: Do Kyungsoo x Unnamed OC (Iris) Trigger Warning: Nightmares, Probably wrong representation of Greek Mythology, Mythical and Evil creatures. Word Count: 1,328
Plot: You were given the ability to Astral Project (Out of body experience) by a deity and you meet a faceless soul of a woman in the 4D world who guides you through the experience. But you are given only 1 hour of your day to ‘spend time’ with Kyungsoo. Kyungsoo sometimes remembers you, but it’s mostly hazy since his job being an Idol doesn’t give him the most peaceful sleep. You and Kyungsoo met accidentally one day and he becomes curious of you.
A/N: HELLLLOOOOO MY ASTRAL BABIES! I'm so, so, so, so, so very sorry for the late update! I just lost my will to write this story for a while and then Writer's block got the best of me. But I'm back now! Sorry for the short update. After I finish my CEO Baekhyun AU (trust that's going to be kind of short-ish lol) I promise to focus on this fic. But after this update, I'm taking a semi-hiatus from this fic okay? But I WILL FINISH THIS, I PROMISE!!!
BTW, this is the chapter where I revealed the Pen name OC use. I will never reveal her real name though. You will know the reason in the future chapters. Just be patient. :P
Alsooo, recently I’ve been used to writing in 2nd person POV and this fic is written in First person. If you see some lines with 2nd person POV, please forgive me. I will proofread this again soon. It’s currently 3:32 AM and I’m groggy af lmfaoooo.
Sorry for that, here's the story update now!!!
“Do you know anyone who breeds cats?” I blurt out randomly as I was wrapping up on proofreading my latest draft of the 3rd short story I was writing for SM. I’ve been researching about cats on my free time for 5 days now and can’t stop.
“What?” Ahyoung asks.
“I said, do you know anyone who bree—“ Before I could even finish my sentence, Ahyoung cuts me off completely.
“I heard you the first time,” Ahyoung said, matter-of-factly.
“Then why did you even ask what?” I scoffed at my friend who was watching a recorded episode of her current favorite drama on my television.
“Why would you want to know if I know a cat breeder?” She asks, more of accused me as if I said something illegal or something really, really taboo.
“I’m planning to get a cat,” I answered her with a big smile on my face. I’m not even looking at her to see me smiling, but I still did.
“You’re planning to what?” I look at Ahyoung pausing her drama on the television and snapped her neck my way. She never pauses when she’s marathon-ing something. Her gaze was strong and full of questions and it’s almost scaring me. Is it too late to regret and take back what I asked her? I guess so…
“You heard me clearly. You’re not deaf right?” I joked.
“Why would you?” It was the only thing that came out of her mouth.
“Uhm… B—because I w—want a cat?” I was also wasn’t sure of my answer, but I can’t tell her why I needed a cat. She might think that I finally lose the last screw that was barely hanging off on my head. I’m not crazy… yet… right?
“Since when did you like cats or any animal for that matter?” Ahyoung’s eyes were so wide, it’s almost the same size as golf balls.
“Since… Last week, I guess.” I shrugged my shoulders once and return my eyes to the computer. I hit the ‘save’ button and exited the document. I clicked on the web browser and went to my email just to check. I saw that there was a reply from the person I was constantly communicating with from SM regarding the 2nd story I sent last night.
Subject: [Re: Second Story] From: [email protected] To: [email protected]
Good day Iris-nim,
SM Town creative team has already skim-through the second story you sent. I’m happy to announce to you that it was accepted and approved by the whole crew. The first story you wrote is already in the process of scriptwriting and will be used for a Web Drama that will be broadcasted by NAVER tvcast in the near future.
As always, it’s a pleasure working with you. We will be waiting with great enthusiasm for the third story you will make for us.
P.S.
Don’t tell anyone, but we are planning on absorbing you to be a part of our team. Nothing is confirmed yet, but I’ll be sure to give nothing but good words about you to our bosses. I’ve always been a big fan of your blog and I hope I could meet you in person someday.
Sincerely,
Park Jisung, Team Leader SM Creative Team
“Ahyoung-ah! Listen to this…” I started.
“What?” Ahyoung shook her head to look at me from the television.
“Don’t tell anyone, but we are planning on absorbing you to be a part of our team. Nothing is confirmed yet, but I’ll be sure to give nothing but good words about you to our bosses. I’ve always been a big fan of your blog and I hope I could meet you in person someday. That was an email from the person from SM.” I read the email to Ahyoung.
“Oh wow, that is so awesome!” Ahyoung enthusiastically clapped and jumped up to give me a big hug.
“Should I take it, if they offered me the job?” I ask Ahyoung and she hit my arm slightly.
“Of course you should! You need to get out more and a desk job at SM is the perfect way to do it. And it’ll be really awesome because our office building is just walking distance from SM Town! We can eat lunch together. I am so excited!!!”
Ahyoung ecstatically jumps up and down as she pulls me up from my chair to do a little rave dance party in my living room with the drama she was watching as our background music. I wasn’t really up for her dance party, but her excitement rubbed off on me immediately. After a while we both crashed on my couch, heaving deep breaths and sweat forming on our forehead.
“Ah, let’s never do that again! My head is throbbing now!” I complained to her like a child.
“Are you kidding me, that’s exercise, my friend! You need that! That’s why you have such a bad back. Your bone density is like of a 70-year-old! You should go to the gym I signed up a few weeks ago. Celebrities go there a lot! I saw some EXO members there before.” Ahyoung giggled when she mentioned EXO. I almost shrieked but then I remember that she didn’t know that I actually listen to EXO’s music.
“EXO?” I pretended not to know.
“Yeah I remember one guy, he was one of the tallest among them and has these really big ears but he’s super handsome, though. I think his name was Kai or was it, Chen? I’m really not sure. I really don’t know all of them. I just know that Baekhyun guy, he’s one of the good singers.”
Ahyoung explained. You idiot, it’s Chanyeol! I cursed at her in my head. But at least he got Baekhyun right, he’s definitely one of the good singers in the group. But in my honest (and biased) opinion, Kyungsoo is the best out of them. All of them are great in singing, but no one beats my Kyungsoo.
“Oh…” I smiled without even noticing it.
“Why are you smiling?” Ahyoung suddenly asks.
“Oh, I just… My mind went flying somewhere and I remember that one time I stepped on dog poop...” I lied, rather convincingly, because Ahyoung’s face immediately scrunched up with disgust.
“Eww, what the hell? You’re so weird!” Ahyoung said as she kicked my legs away from her in a joking manner.
“I know and that’s why you love me!” I stick out my tongue at her and threw a pillow on her face. She attacked me back with another pillow and we ended our night with a pillow war!
#Do Kyungsoo#D.O#Kyungsoo#EXO Do Kyungsoo#EXO D.O#EXO Kyungsoo#Angst#Smut#Fluff#Fanfictions#Fanfic#EXO Fanfic#D.O Fanfic#Kyungsoo Fanfic
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