#almost choked on my banana pudding

[ultracheesing]

ALEX FIXING HIS CLOTHES AND HENRY LITERALLY BEING UNABLE TO STOP SMILING— i need to be sedated

[darcydarlingdabbles]

Boys at The Beach ~ 2

Hazbin ~RadioApple+Static ~ 4.3 k

The Explicit Part 2

this is completely a crack fic where Lucifer, Alastor, and Vox go to a beach upstairs in human form. And things get heated.

The sun was starting to hang low on the horizon when Lucifer decided he was starving and went to dig into the bright red cooler. 

The angel pulled out an array of dishes—far from the usual beach fare. 

Shrimp remoulade served chilled across a slice of crusty French bread. Delicate crab cakes with a tangy hot sauce. Mini muffulettas with layers of meats, cheeses, and olives. 

And there was even dessert—individual banana bread pudding cups. 

“I’m impressed, Your Majesty.” Vox drawled, leaning forward to inspect the spread. “This is quite the feast.”

“Oh, you like the food huh?” Lucifer chuckled, an angelic smirk crossing his lips. “Better than a perfect little housewife could whip up, huh?” 

Alastor’s ears pricked, not liking where this was going, though Vox was ready to agree with anything the King said as he stuffed a muffuletta into his mouth. 

“Well, I can’t take the credit—Alastor made it all.”

The Radio Demon’s eye was twitching to the point he could not enjoy his rival choking on his mouthful. 

Vox’s eyes went wide as he turned to Alastor. “You can cook?”

The brunette pushed his glasses up the freckles on his nose and his smirk got a little bit more smug. “I assure you, I have many talents that you are entirely unaware of.” 

Vox swallowed, thickly. 

“Besides,” Alastor shrugged it off. “It wouldn’t due to serve the King of Hell a bunch of pre-packaged rubbish.”

“I suppose not,” Vox conceded, eyeing the artfully arranged platters. Despite himself, his mouth watered at the tantalizing aromas wafting from the cooler. “I have to admit, it does look... decent.”

 “High praise indeed, coming from you!” Alastor’s laugh crackled like radio static. “Perhaps you’d care for a taste? I assure you, my culinary skills are quite beyond up to par.”

As Vox reached for a crab cake, he couldn’t help but wonder what other hidden talents the Radio Demon might possess. 

It was infuriating and intriguing in equal measure.

The angel and the demons fell into a silence as they savored the gourmet spread, the only sounds the gentle lapping of waves and the occasional clink of aluminum cans. 

Vox found himself reluctantly impressed by Alastor’s culinary prowess, though he’d sooner short-circuit than admit it aloud.

As the sun began its descent, painting the sky in vibrant hues of orange and pink, Vox noticed a subtle shift in the atmosphere.

 Lucifer, who the television demon considered to be this untouchably powerful figure, leaned against Alastor’s shoulder with a contented sigh.

“You know,” The King mused, his voice uncharacteristically soft, “one of the things I truly loved about Earth were the sunsets. Hell has its charms, but nothing quite compares to this.”

 The demon’s eyes widened as he spotted their hands intertwined on the beach blanket. 

Vox felt like he was intruding on an intimate moment. He cleared his throat awkwardly. “It’s, uh, certainly something.”

Alastor’s eyes darted to Vox, noticing his gaze on their linked hands. The Radio Demon’s perpetual smile tightened almost imperceptibly as he pulled away from Lucifer.

“Well!” Alastor announced, his voice overly cheerful. “I think I’ll take a little stroll after our delightful repast.”

Before anyone could respond, the Radio Demon vanished into the towering driftwood, leaving Vox and Lucifer alone on the beach.

The angel had a crown on his face that looked thoughtful, and the demon stayed stiffly silent. Still feeling like he was intruding. 

Vox’s gaze fell on the book Alastor had left behind, curiosity getting the better of him. He reached for it, flipping it over to read the cover.

If he still had his television head, it might have just blue-screened. “Is this... a chick book?”

Vox blinked, finally discarding his glasses to confirm—yep, it was a romance novel. 

The demon was momentarily distracted by the unexpected discovery of Alastor’s literary tastes.

 When he looked up again, he found himself alone on the expansive beach. The setting sun cast long shadows across the sand, and an eerie stillness settled over the area.

“Your Highness?” Vox called out, his voice echoing in the emptiness. “Radio Star?”

No one answered him. 

Unease prickling at his circuits, Vox rose to his feet, scanning the shoreline. His gaze fell upon the looming driftwood maze; a forest of gnarled branches reaching skyward like skeletal fingers. Without much choice, he ventured into the labyrinth of bleached wood.

~~~~🌊~~~~

“Hello?” he called again, pushing aside a tangle of branches. “Anyone there?”

As he rounded a particularly large arid tree, Vox froze. 

There, nestled behind a twist of roots, stood Alastor and Lucifer. The Radio Demon, in his real form but still in his beach clothes, leaned casually against a weathered trunk, his signature grin taken an amicable twist as he ducked his head to the King of Hell.

Vox flickered with pure shock. He’d never seen Alastor so...open. The deer demon’s usual rigid posture had softened, and he seemed utterly unbothered by the lack of personal space between them.

Or maybe the space between them was very personal

“You should have seen his face, my dear,” Alastor chuckled, his voice a low purr. “Absolutely priceless!”

Lucifer laughed, a sound like tinkling bells. “Oh, I can imagine. You’re vicious, aren’t ya Bambi?”

Vox felt a twinge of...something. Jealousy? Surely not. Insecure? The fuckers better not be talking about him. He was about to announce his presence when Lucifer’s next move stopped him cold.

The fallen angel’s hand trailed up Alastor’s chest, sliding up beneath the swirling pattern of the red overshirt. 

Holy shit. Vox’s mind was reeling—certain that Alastor was finally going to break and snap at being touched. 

The television demon’s circuits nearly fried as Lucifer rose on his toes, pressing a tender kiss.

Alastor seemed frozen on the spot, for a long moment.

Then the Radio Demon’s hand lifted, curled around Lucifer’s neck to pull the angel’s head back—and press a searing kiss down his throat. 

Alastor’s lips trailed a path down, eliciting a soft gasp from the devil himself.

Vox felt his face heating up, static crackling across his skin as his irises flashed through red and blue.

 He couldn’t tear his eyes away from the scene unfolding before him. 

A realization hit him like a ton of bricks: Alastor, the prudish, touch-averse Radio Demon, was not only allowing Lucifer’s advances because he was the King—he was actively participating in it.

“Fucking call me a brownnoser, huh?” Vox hissed bitterly, before he could stop himself or clap a hand over his mouth. 

Alastor’s eyes snapped open, glowing an infernal scarlet. Without breaking contact with Lucifer’s throat, he murmured. “It seems we have an audience, my dear.”

The angel laughed in his hold. 

“Come out come out Voxy. Hiding isn’t very becoming of an Overlord, now is it?”

Panic surged through Vox’s system. He’d just been caught creeping on the fucking King of Hell. And Alastor. How the fuck was he supposed to explain that? 

Or the way his human face was heating up with a blush. 

Scrambling for an excuse, Vox stepped out from behind the driftwood, defaulted what he was good at—throwing jabs at his rival.

“I wasn’t hiding, Your Majesty! I was just…stunned by Alastor’s pathetic attempts at making a fool of himself.” Vox frowned, but the insult had already fumbled its way out of his mouth. 

Alastor gave a derisive snort.

“That so?” Lucifer’s eyebrow arched, a mischievous glint in his golden eyes as Alastor released his hold. “And I suppose you think you could do better, hmm?”

Vox’s face burned like the sun had scorched him for hours. He opened his mouth to retort, but no words came out.

Alastor’s eyes narrowed, a low growl rumbling in his throat as he glowered at Vox.

Lucifer’s grin widened, showing a hint of sharp teeth. “Well then, Vox,” he snickered, “put up or shut up.”

“I…Sire—” 

Vox hesitated, his usual bravado faltering under the intense gazes of both Alastor and Lucifer. Before he could muster a response, golden magic wrapped around his waist, and dragged him into the driftwood clearing.

“Don’t duck out now, big guy.” Lucifer smirked, flicking out his forked tongue as he grabbed the television demon by his teal stripes and dragged him down. 

As their lips met, Vox’s mind went blank, forgetting every witty comeback he’d ever crafted and every kiss he’d ever had. The only thought he had was to open his mouth and let the serpent tongue plunder him. Wondering how much of this sweet taste belonged to the deer demon. 

Alastor watched with narrowed eyes, his perpetual smile tightening as he snorted. “How utterly sloppy,” he sneered, turning on his heel to step back. “I think I’ve seen quite enough of this spectacle.”

Lucifer’s hand shot out, fingers wrapping around the Radio Demon’s wrist. “Not so fast, Bambi,” Lucifer cooed, breaking away from Vox. “The show’s only just begun.”

Vox blinked in surprise as Alastor actually stilled, remaining rooted to the spot despite his obvious disdain.

“Why don’t you show us how it’s really done?” Lucifer said, turning his attention back to Alastor with a challenging smirk. 

Alastor’s eyes flashed dangerously. “You’re playing with fire, my King,” he warned, voice low and crackling with static.

“Then burn me,” Lucifer whispered back.

A moment passed between the two, where a silent understanding took hold. 

Alastor’s claws seized a fistful of Lucifer’s golden hair, yanking him close. Their lips crashed together in a fierce, forceful kiss that took even Vox’s breath away.

Vox watched, transfixed, as Alastor pressed Lucifer back against the driftwood. There was nothing gentle about the way the Radio Demon’s hands roamed over the fallen angel’s body, fingers digging into his hips possessively.

Holy fucking shit. 

Vox felt his human lips pull downward into an actual pout as he watched Alastor prove that he could talk the talk and walk the walk. 

The ache in the television demon’s chest had nothing to do with missing Lucifer’s forked tongue; his eyes were on the red fingers locked in the golden hair. 

Dammit all. He was wishing he was under that sharp smile. 

He tried to school his expression into one of indifference, but Alastor, ever perceptive, caught the longing in Vox’s gaze. Making the other demon’s gut curl with want and humiliation. 

The King of Hell pushed gently against Alastor’s chest, breaking their kiss.

“Oh Al,” Lucifer purred, his voice honey-sweet, “I think there’s someone else who’d like a taste.”

Alastor’s eyes narrowed. “Surely, you jest.”

Lucifer nodded towards Vox, a mischievous glint in his eye. 

“What?” Vox and Alastor exclaimed in unison, their eyes meeting with a clash and a sneer from the deer demon.

Vox’s circuits thrummed with want, but his pride refused to let him give in so easily. “As if I’d want that fucker’s mouth anywhere near me,” he scoffed, even as his inner voice screamed for him to shut up and take the opportunity.

“You would be fortunate if I didn’t rip out your throat.” Alastor growled, his smile turned sinister as it pulled back over his gnashed teeth. 

Lucifer, undeterred, began trailing kisses up along Alastor’s throat. He paused at a spot just below Alastor’s jaw—causing the Radio Demon to shudder.

“Come now, darling,” Lucifer murmured against Alastor’s skin. “Just a little kiss. He’s so desperate for it.”

Vox burned bright with embarrassment. “I do not—” he began to protest, but the words died in his throat as Alastor’s crimson gaze locked onto him, and actually tilted his head. Like he was consider it.

Alastor’s trademark grin widened, a hint of malice glinting in his eyes. “Oh, very well,” he drawled, his voice dripping with sarcasm. “If it’ll shut you both up.”

In one fluid motion, Alastor’s hand shot out, grasping Vox by the chin firmly.

 The TV demon barely had time to process what was happening before Alastor’s lips were on his and making him short-circuit. 

 It was far from gentle—a clash of teeth and static electricity that sent sparks flying.

Vox’s pride crumbled under the Radio Demon’s mouth.

 A low moan escaped him, unbidden, as Alastor’s tongue traced the edge of his lips, demanding entrance. Submission. 

Vox berated himself, even as his knees threatened to give out. He hated how much he was enjoying this, how desperately he’d wanted it. But Alastor was kissing him like he wanted to consume him, whole, and Vox found himself powerless to resist.

Lucifer watched the scene unfold with undisguised glee, practically bouncing with excitement. As Alastor finally pulled away, leaving Vox dazed and panting, the fallen angel clapped his hands together.

“You know, this was on my beach day to-do list as well!” Lucifer exclaimed. 

Alastor raised an eyebrow,  looking and sounding gallingly uneffected by the state he’d left Vox in. “What was?”

“Sex on the beach!” Lucifer replied with a wink.

Vox’s jaw dropped, his screen flickering in shock. Alastor, for his part, looked equally taken aback.

“Not going to happen.” Alastor huffed, shoving Vox back into some dried out tree roots. 

Lucifer’s eyes gleamed as he grabbed Alastor by his overshirt, pulling him close. “Oh, come on, darling,” he purred, winding his arms around Alastor’s narrow waist. “Don’t be such a spoilsport.”

To Vox’s utter astonishment, he saw the Radio Demon’s resolve begin to waiver. One of his arms curled around the devil’s middle. 

Lucifer was leaning up on his toes, peppering Alastor with more kisses up along his cheek, under his ear, before reaching up and tugging the fuzzy appendage down to his lips.

“Just imagine it...your enemy on his knees, begging for your cock...”

“I would never fucking—” Vox bristled at Lucifer’s words, spluttering indignantly. “—for a fucking fossil to—whatever!”

“Really? Are you sure about that?” Lucifer turned to him, a knowing smirk playing on his lips.  He gestured around the deserted beach. “No one would ever know but us. And this might be your only chance to get a taste of Alastor’s…talents.”

Vox’s circuits buzzed with conflicting emotions—desire, pride, and a burning curiosity he couldn’t quash. He opened his mouth to retort, but no words came out.

Alastor’s eyes suddenly blazed crimson, his grin widening to reveal all of his sharp teeth. He fixed Vox with a predatory gaze that sent shivers down the television demon’s spine.

“Well then, if you truly are desperate, Vox,” Alastor purred, his voice dripping with dark promise. “Beg me.”

Vox’s vision swirled with red. But, to his horror, he found himself sinking to his knees in the cooling sand. His circuits hummed with mortification and arousal as he lowered his head in supplication. “Please, Alastor... let me... I-I... I want to... please...”

The Radio Demon had never smirked like this in his life or death, staring down at the humbled television demon…as he gave an unimpressed shrug. 

“Wicked thing you are.” Lucifer gave a delighted chuckle. “He’s hard to impress Vox, you’ve gotta try harder.”

The demon on his knees spluttered, feeling two inches tall before the two men. 

“Perhaps…a little demonstration would convince me.” Alastor said, nonchalant as ever. Driving the other demon wild. 

“Just tell me what the fuck you want,” Vox growled through grit teeth. 

Alastor’s smile glowered down at him, shivering down his spine, as the red fingers drew down along Lucifer’s marbled skin and between the angel’s legs. 

“You can’t be fucking serious.” Vox snarled. 

“Deadly.” Alastor purred. “Unless…you think you are not worth of pleasuring the king.” 

Vox couldn’t stand the heavy implication on the demon’s tongue. 

Embarrassment and arousal warring within him, the television demon turned his attention to Lucifer’s bulging swim trunks. His fingers trembled as he reached for the drawstrings. 

His eyes locked with Lucifer’s smug, satisfied grin. With a flourish, Vox exposed Lucifer’s impressive erection, already leaking with anticipation.

Lucifer hissed as Vox’s dextrous fingers teased his shaft, and Alastor shifted closer to the angel, leering over the demon on his knees. 

“Go on.”

Vox’s cheeks burned as he wrapped his mouth around the swollen head of Lucifer’s cock, his tongue flicking out to taste the sweet pre-cum. Wondering if it was just angels that tasted so sweet. 

 Lucifer moaned, and Vox couldn’t help but feel a twisted sense of accomplishment as Alastor’s fingers twitched along the devil’s hip. 

He slid his lips further down, taking more of the angelic shaft into his mouth, his throat clenching around the intrusion.

“Mmm, that’s it,” Lucifer purred, running his fingers through Vox’s inky black hair. “I knew you had it in you.”

In the periphery, Vox saw Alastor’s shorts tenting outwards, and the television demon’s eyes glued to the debauched display. 

Vox’s circuits shorted with lust and humiliation, but he couldn’t seem to stop himself.

“Fuck,” Lucifer moaned, gripping Vox’s hair tighter. “You sure make for a good cockwarmer, picture box.”

Vox’s eyes flashed with fury, but he didn’t stop his ministrations. He was determined to show what he could do, to seize this unimaginable moment, even if it meant swallowing his pride—literally.

Lucifer’s moans grew louder, and Vox realized with another shock of shame that he was growing hard in his swimsuit. More than just a flash of arousal.

Alastor’s crimson eyes on him, on how he sank down the angel’s shaft, was making a growing damp spot in his shorts and driving a hunger that terrified the demon’s ego. 

Lucifer’s fingers sliped from Vox’s hair, sliding back up Alastor’s chest to curl in his tight black shirt and yank him down. “You have to try his mouth, Bambi.”

“As you wish, my King.”

Suddenly, Alastor’s hand was in Vox’s hair, pulling him back. 

The television demon couldn’t hold the whine that ripped from his throat as Lucifer’s cock slipped from his mouth. But Alastor’s grip was bruising. 

Vox’s eyes flicked up to meet Alastor’s, and he saw the hunger there. The demon’s eyes were glowing red, and his fangs were on full display as he panted.

 Vox’s heart pounded in his chest, his body trembling with anticipation.

He watched as Alastor pulled his length from his shorts—revealing his cock. 

It was slender and long like the deer demon’s body, and just like the pattern of his arms and legs, his cock darkened from a gray tan to pitch black at the tip. 

Vox’s eyes widened, and he licked his lips involuntarily. 

Alastor chuckled darkly, grabbing Vox’s chin and forcing him to look up.

“Ask nicely,” he demanded, the filter vanished from his voice. No jaunty, high accent or crackle of static. It was a voice that must be obeyed. 

Vox’s pride rebelled at the command, but his body betrayed him. He was desperate to feel Alastor’s cock in his mouth, to taste the demon’s lust and power.

“Please, ” he whimpered, his voice hoarse from sucking Lucifer’s cock. “Fuck my throat, Alastor.”

Alastor’s eyes narrowed, but he said nothing. He simply grabbed Vox’s hair and forced the demon’s head down onto his cock. He thrust his hips forward, hitting the back of Vox’s throat. 

Vox gagged, his eyes watering, but he kept sucking, his own arousal building with every strangled sound that escaped his abused throat.

He gagged again, but Alastor didn’t let up. He held Vox’s head in place, thrusting his hips forward and fucking Vox’s throat roughly.

 Vox could feel his cock straining against the rough swimsuit material.

He moaned, the sound muffled by Alastor’s cock. 

He could hear Lucifer’s laughter in the background, but he didn’t care. 

All that mattered…was pleasing Alastor.

“Mm, I suppose he is mouth is…tolerable enough.” The Radio Demon tutted. 

And Vox burned with humiliation all over again? Tolerable? Barely adequate??

Alastor wasn’t even speaking to him! His eyes and his smirk were on Lucifer, leaning to the angel to kiss him languidly. 

Ignoring that Vox was literally sucking his dick.

Which was fucking humiliating…and somehow, even fucking hotter. Vox redoubled his efforts, his tongue swirling around the dark head of Alastor’s cock before sucking down his length, his mouth a blur as he tried to please his enemy. His own prick leaking down his thighs. 

The hand in his hair was loose, lazy in his hold. 

Vox stared daggers up at the Radio Demon, barely catching the scarlet sclera as Alastor leaned over to casually whisper something filthy into Lucifer’s ear. 

The devil bit his bottom lip.. 

And the demon saw why. The hand Alastor was paying attention to was disappearing into Lucifer’s shorts. His wrist moving slow, steady, hitching upward. Obviously thrusting those long fingers into the angel’s hole. 

Vox’s cheeks burned with shame, and he redoubled his efforts. Fighting for the Radio Demon’s focus, for his attention as he hollowed his cheeks and sucked harder, his tongue running along the sensitive underside of his shaft. 

Alastor let out a low growl. And Vox felt a spark of triumph in his chest as the muscles of the demon’s thighs tensed—and his own orgasm built as Alastor’s did. 

The deer demon’s lips pulled back from Lucifer’s, driving Vox wild as his eyes clenched shut and a little pant came from his lips. 

Vox moaned, his own arousal building to a fever pitch. He could feel his cock straining against his shorts, could feel the telltale tingling in his spine.

Lucifer whispered something in Alastor’s ear that made the demon chuckle. 

Before Vox could wonder, Alastor’s heavy-lidded eyes opened, and finally landed on his. 

“Vox…” he purred in that irresistible voice. “Good boy.” 

The television demon let out a strangled cry, his orgasm crashing into him like a tidal wave. His cock pulsed as his come soaked his swimsuit. 

When Vox came back to reality he realized what he’d done. Creamed his shorts so damn hard he’d burst out of human form—his bliss faded to utter humiliation. And he burned with it. 

He didn’t want to open his eyes. Didn’t want to see Lucifer’s judgement and the mirth that would be in Alastor’s face at his shame. 

Vox expected to hear laughter at his expense—but what he heard was a low, pleasured gasp. 

His mismatched eyes opened and saw that neither Alastor or Lucifer were giving him the time of night. 

The Radio Demon had the Devil pressed back against the driftwood tree trunk, claws dug into the bark as pale legs wrapped desperately around his narrow waist. 

Lucifer’s shorts laid discarded in the sand as the two tangled in their primal embrace. The angel’s head was thrown back in bliss, a little breath punched from his lips with every snap of Alastor’s hips. 

Vox’s euphoria evaporated. Replaced by a bitter jealousy. 

The demon’s hooded eyes locked onto Lucifer’s, his lips curled into a satisfied smirk. 

Vox ached with envy, wishing he were the one being so thoroughly taken. Trembling as Lucifer came on Alastor’s cock. 

The Radio Demon stilled as the angel’s panting slowed, letting him catch his breath. 

Lucifer leaned up, whispering something to Alastor—and the red gaze flickered towards Vox, his eyebrow arched. 

His eyes were dark with desire, and the television demon felt a shiver run down his spine. 

A wicked grin spread over the Radio Demon’s face. And he nodded. 

“Hey, Voxy…” Lucifer called in that sing-song voice of his, as the demon let him back down onto his feet. “C’mere.” 

His brain blue-screened all over again. 

A cool ocean breeze swept across the beach, sending a shiver down Vox’s spine as he watched Alastor framed against the star-dotted sky. The demon pulled back, his red fingers wrapped around the dark slink of his cock. 

 Vox hesitated. Wondering what more they could want from him when they were clearly wrapped up in each other. 

“Come on,” Lucifer crooked his fingers. 

Alastor said nothing, but simply stroked over his straining cock. 

Saliva pooled in Vox’s mouth like he was starving. 

He didn’t even think to brush the sand from his blue knees as he moved to stand—when Alastor finally spoke. 

“Ah-ah,” He purred, looking over at him with glowing red eyes, heavy with lust. “Crawl.”

“What the fuck!?” Vox snapped as his screen flashed and glitched indignantly. 

“Did I stutter?” Alastor tilted his head, his pupils turned to slits. “If you want to taste my come…then you’ll crawl to me.” 

Vox dug his teal claws into the sand, already moving, his screen burning red as he crawled his way to Alastor. Rewarded with the Radio Demon’s gasp as he stroked over his own glistening length. 

Alastor grabbed the flat head, watching his enemy’s digital eyes blown and begging as he stroked himself—until he finally came, splattering Vox’s screen with his come. 

The television demon burned with utter humiliation…and a strange satisfaction at the taste on his tongue, knowing that he had finally pleased Alastor. 

~~~~🌊~~~~

The sun had long since set when Lucifer wrapped himself around Alastor, pillowing into the demon’s chest where they lay back on the beach blanket. Sand clinging to their clothing and skin. 

“See,” Lucifer grinned, folding his fingers under his chin as he looked at the Radio Demon. “I told ya beach day was a great idea.” 

Alastor snorted, rolling his eyes behind his oval glasses. “Well, it certainly was an experience.”

“Sure was.” Lucifer grinned. 

A curse and thump snapped their attention to Vox, stumbling through the portal Lucifer had left open to carry back their gear to hell. 

“You alright Voxy?” Lucifer called. 

The demon blustered, covering his face—which seemed to have turned permanently cherry-red, as he cleared his throat. “Of course, Your Majesty. Just, have to get back to work. I had a lovely—”

Alastor leaned up on his elbows, cocking an eyebrow as he met the digital eyes. 

Vox’s screen blanked, displaying a broadcasting error as he fell through the portal back into his office. 

“And no one in Hell will ever believe it.” Alastor chuckled. 

[whattraintracks]

7. Prank Successful - The Next Mutation

Venus, Raph, and Donnie figure out how to reverse the hypnosis caused in "Sewer Crash."

"Well then," Raph stretches. "Guess we tell the guys it's safe to say the b-word again." 

Venus perks up. "Bit—" 

"The otha' b-word, Venus." 

"Oh." 

"Well, we could do that." Donnie raises steepled hands to his chin. "Or..." 

--------------------------

"I can't take it anymore! Make it stop!" 

Raph levels Mikey a look somewhere between unimpressed and exasperated. "Make what stop?" 

Venus is humming to herself as she unloads a bag of groceries. A carton of banana peppers, banana pudding, and banana-flavored cheez-its join their bounty on the kitchen table. 

"The groceries!" He anguishes. 

"Whaddaya mean stop the groceries?" He brandishes an anchovy and banana hot pocket. "We need food, and you told me it was my turn to get 'em." 

"Not this kind of food! Anything but this! This is too cruel, Raph! What have I done to be punished like this!? How am I supposed to eat all of these banana foods when I can't even say the wor—" He cuts himself short with a gasp, eyes bulging. 

It takes everything Raph's got not to grin. Don was right: hook, line, and sinker. Mikey whips around to the turtle himself, already playing his part to a tee. 

"My will is yours," Donnie intones. 

"No! Donnie!" Mikey reaches out to shake him, "Banana!" 

Right on cue, Leo charges in. "Did somebody say banana!?" 

"Dude!" Mikey yelps, spinning around and throwing his hands to his head, "I already said it twice!" 

They look at Donnie, still droning. 

"Banana!" They both shout. 

"I'll say it!" 

"No, I'll say it!" 

"Banana!" 

They're not even looking at Donnie anymore, just shouting frantically in each other's faces. Raph watches with growing delight as Donnie stands and leaves the room completely unnoticed. 

Venus—because she's much sneakier than everyone gives her credit—creeps over, looking equally delighted. She braces on his shoulder to peek past the fridge at Donnie, then back at dumb and dumber. "How long do you think they will fall at it?" 

"That's fall for it, babe." He grins slyly at her. "And as long as Masta' Splinter lets 'em." 

She snickers. Sensei's never met a well-meaning joke he didn't love. 

The shouting match chokes when Leo finally realises, "Donnie's gone!" 

"Oh no!" Mikey shoves past Leo to the stairs. "Don't do it, Donnie! You're too young for prison!" 

Leo races after him. He's almost entirely up the ladder before he shouts, "Raph, Venus, come on!" 

Raph presses a fist to his beak. He makes eye contact with Venus, and she bursts into high, pealing laughter. Before long, they're both busting a gut. 

"Oh, man!" He folds over the table. "That was so much better than I thought it would be." 

Venus is on her knees giggling, "Should," she hiccups, "should we?" 

"I'll watch them with the satellite," Donnie reassures as he wanders back into the kitchen, grabbing a bag of seaweed and banana chips. He salutes Raph with a little grin. 

"Good with me. Say, Venus," he bids, offering her a hand up. "You ever seen Dumb and Dumber?"

--------------------------

Bonus: the sketch I made to help me figure out where everyone was in this scene.

[milkybonya]

library loser _ ksm

order 046, @starlostseungmin : large banana milk tea with pudding for skz seungmin

warnings: reader is in love with seungmin from the start but turns it into hate, not proof-read :_(

#: college!au, enemies to lovers!, librarian!au, ft. heartbreaker!Hyunjin

summary: it's almost love at first sight with Seungmin,, but then he becomes someone you avoid because of a misunderstanding :/

[💌: imagining Seungmin in an enemies to lovers trope was just so hard because he's so sweet and cute and a ball of fluff >_< so this was such a challenge but i really liked that it was???]

when you first walked into one of your campus libraries, the one that would soon become your favourite and go-to spot, you kind of... instantly fell for the pretty boy librarian.

your eyes fell on him a first time just by chance as you were scoping the place out. then, you willingly looked at him a second time when you processed him: legs crossed behind the main desk in a grey hoodie and beige pants, glasses sliding down his squishy nose and cheeks sucked in as he focused on whatever he was reading.

the third time you looked at him was to see what he was reading. you squinted and leaned towards him, even though you were standing quite far from him. you looked hard and squinted some more while slowly walking... and you tripped over a rip in the carpet and fell flat on your face.

pretty librarian boy saw. he saw, gasped, and ran over. you shut your eyes tightly and wished you could disappear.

"hey, hey are you okay? can you sit up? let me help you," he said.

even his voice sounded heavenly...

"i'm fine," you said with reddened cheeks and a small smile.

yet he still helped you sit up, his surprisingly strong arms gently wrapping around you and pushing you up.

"it's my first time here... i guess i got a little nervous?" you muttered.

the boy giggled and sent butterflies raging through you.

"is that so? maybe i'll be seeing you more often from now on. i'm Seungmin, Kim Seungmin," he said.

"i'm y/n," you managed to say.

i wish i could say the two of you then fell in love and lived happily ever after, but..

it just wasn't that easy.

-

as the weeks passed, Seungmin was right. he did see you more often. the library he worked at became your favourite study spot, and he'd always greet you on your way in. sometimes he'd even hand you a granola bar or fruit, saying he just found it 'laying around' when he'd actually spent hours at the grocery store picking it out.

but a month later, everything fell apart.

your friend had been deeply hurt by someone named Hyunjin. he was dared to get into a relationship with them just to see how long they'd last and how fast Hyunjin could get them to sleep with him. once your friend found out about this dare, they broke up with him right away and came running to you, in tears.

"y/nnnnn," they sobbed.

you patted their back and rubbed circles on it as they spoke.

"i loved him so much. i didn't know this was all a lie. he even painted portraits of me.. he was so romantic, he'd take me on café dates.."

Hyunjin was also mourning the end of the relationship. even though it had started as a dare, he had fallen fast for your friend. but of course, neither you nor your friend knew that.

so rightfully so, both of you cursed Hyunjin out.

"he's a prick anyway. all he has going for him is his pretty face. don't worry, [best friend's name], we'll find you someone better. Hyunjin can... can... choke on a grape!" you said.

your friend giggled a bit and you were happy to see their smile.

"i don't want to see him or his friends ever again."

"me neither," you replied, "and who are his friends? i'll give all of them the cold shoulder."

"there's Changbin, Han, Jeongin, Seungmin--"

"Seungmin?! Kim Seungmin?"

"yeah, he works at the library. him and Hyunjin are pretty close."

"i knew there was something up with him. pathetic. he's friends with Hyunjin? ha..."

your best friend shook your head at you as you mumbled to yourself. you decided you and Seungmin were now sworn enemies on the basis of him being friends with the man who broke your best friend's heart.

-

"good morning y/n--oh." Seungmin didn't finish his greeting as you rushed past him while ignoring him. he was trapped in a confused daze for a few seconds, but then he let it go, thinking you might've been deep in your thoughts.

but then, it happened everyday. it happened so often that Seungmin stopped greeting you. he'd just follow you with his eyes and wonder what happened. he was a little too scared to ask because it's not like the two of you were close friends or anything. he thought to himself that you had the right to ignore him if you wanted to.

one day, he told his friend, Hyunjin about it.

"you said their name is y/n?" Hyunjin asked.

Seungmin nodded, sadly stirring his iced coffee with a straw.

"ah... they're friends with [best friend's name]. you know how i... how we dated and it didn't end so well because of that stupid dare," Hyunjin explained.

"but what does that have anything to do with me?" Seungmin asked.

"it doesn't, but they don't know that. they don't know Changbin hyung is the one who made that stupid dare. they probably think all of my friends were part of this, including you. [best friend's name] always talked about y/n and how they're their closest friend. y/n probably cares so much for [best friend's name] that they stopped talking to you out of anger over [best friend's name]'s situation."

Seungmin nodded along, finally processing and making sense of the situation. yet, it just made him love you more. ah, yes. Seungmin had already fallen in love with you. and now seeing how much you cared for your friend made him love you even more.

he sighed, wondering what he should do.

"i don't want your... thing with y/n to end up like me and their best friend. you should talk to them about it," Hyunjin advised after Seungmin told him about his crush on you.

-

"hey, hey y/n? y/n! can we just... talk for a second?" Seungmin asked, grabbing hold of your arm as you tried to walk away again.

anger bubbled up within you. one of Hyunjin's stupid friends was touching you and you were seething.

"let. go." you said without turning around.

Seungmin didn't, so you pushed his hand away and finally turned to face him.

"you're just a pathetic library loser and i have nothing to say to you. so leave me alone," you said, walking away.

Seungmin gritted his teeth and looked away, trying not to cry on the spot. if only you'd understand... but fine. if you weren't going to give him a chance, he wouldn't waste his energy on you either.

-

Seungmin no longer followed you with his eyes when you walked in. he stopped making sure your favourite spot was empty when you'd arrive. you didn't even know he'd do that for you, but just suddenly noticed your usual spot was always occupied.

at some point, Seungmin got petty. he hid away the textbooks he knew you needed and always read. when you'd walk to the desk to ask him where they were, he'd walk away the second he saw you approaching him so he wouldn't need to talk to you. his coworker who would talk to you would also be confused, telling you that the textbook was definitely in the library, but not in it's usual spot.

"i guess another student keeps beating me to it. maybe they read it without checking it out! thank you, though," you'd say, returning to your spot.

Seungmin would watch as you slouched over with a sigh, shuffling through your papers and wondering how you'd study. always, every time, Seungmin would always place the book in front of you when you weren't paying attention or when you napped for a bit. he felt bad, somehow.

you'd discover it and let out a tiny squeal of glee, opening it up to prepare to study.

Seungmin would always watch you with a smile. it'd make him wonder why he's acting so petty in the first place.

-

one day, you and your best friend had a group study session at the library. your best friend noticed the way Seungmin acted, stealing glances at you but acting petty, and they noticed the way you ignored all of this.

"what's going on with you and Seungmin?" they asked.

"nothing!" you blurted, but that just made them ask you more questions and in the end, you had to confide.

when you explained everything to them, your friend sighed and gave you a pat on the back.

"y/n... you're avoiding Seungmin because of me?"

"no! i'm just so angry.." you replied.

"no, y/n, it's because of what Hyunjin did to me. you should just stop."

"huh?"

"Seungmin wasn't involved in this, not in the slightest. it was only between Changbin and Hyunjin. Hyunjin told me Seungmin even told him not to go through with it."

you felt your heartbeat in your throat. Seungmin... had actually been against this?

"wait... Hyunjin told you? did you speak to him recently?" you asked.

your friend felt flustered and looked away, so you tugged on their arm to get them to speak.

"well... he came to my dorm, even though visitors are not allowed, and he begged me to hear him out so i did and... long story short we're back together."

"what?!" you yelled. you hung your head in apology as everyone stared at you. Seungmin giggled, wondering what could have shocked you so much.

"why don't you just go over there and join the conversation?" his coworker asked him.

Seungmin cleared his throat and returned to the computer, still stealing glances at you.

"yeah.. but i promise there's nothing to be worried about."

"i can trust you, right? i'll have to meet Hyunjin one of these days."

"for now, go meet Seungmin! i can't believe the way you treated him because of this misunderstanding. go, go explain!" your friend said, pushing you out of your seat.

you stumbled away from your spot and towards the main desk, where Seungmin worked. he noticed you getting closer and closer and furrowed his brows, wondering what the problem was.

you didn't know how to tell him and you didn't know what, so when you approached him, you asked for a paper and pen. he handed them to you and you wrote out a note, sliding it to him before walking away.

Hi Seungmin ^-^

I have a lot to explain.. can you meet me by the park outside the student centre when your shift ends? I'll be there!

y/n

-

you watched Seungmin scurry towards you. he was worried you'd been waiting for a while and he didn't want to make you wait for so long.

"y/n.. is everything okay?" he asked, his eyebrows furrowed.

"no.. i misunderstood something and that's why i've been so weird around you recently," you explained, "i thought you were part of the reason Hyunjin broke my friend's heart, but i just realized that you had nothing to do with it. i'm sorry."

Seungmin gave you a small smile.

"i knew that's why you were mad at me but then i also started getting petty. it isn't your fault; you were just being a good friend."

"can we just start all over then?" you asked him, and he nodded.

"let's start by going out an actual date instead of staring at each other in the library," Seungmin suggested, making you laugh.

"well, you're free now, right? do you wanna go now?" you asked.

"sure!" Seungmin agreed, shyly taking one of your hands and guiding you away from the park.

[quickboot]

Noodles actually gets a serving of mashed banana every day anyway, because I mix some bilberry powder into it for her cataracts (she's 8 years old). Disclaimer that this was not done under a vet's advice, and in fact the vet thinks it isn't going to help, but she thinks it won't hurt anything. And Noodles really enjoys it. I call it her "pudding" and she comes running for it. And since I mix a big batch up, freeze it, and thaw it before serving, it's nice and soft, almost watery, so I don't have to worry about her choking on it.

I do keep dried fruit around for extra treats, though. When Noodles gets her daily pudding, my other bunny gets a (no-sugar-added) banana chip so he doesn't feel left out. They also get a lot of dried flowers, because I can get a huge bag of calendula on Amazon for $15, and they're a low-sugar treat I can sprinkle over hay, or give the buns when they start begging for snacks.

I wish I felt as passionate about anything as Noodles feels about cilantro

[marshieee]

✨Haikyuu boys as your brother series✨

Hospital shenanigans

Read broken bone pt.2

A/N: not me reading either soft or spicy headcanons on tiktok no sir

Kozume kenma

He may not sound so worried in the text but he was actually pretty worried.

And blame the everything if he mess up like the net why is there a net in the middle of the court.

Probably ask kuroo to accompany him to the supermarket to buy snacks for himself.

Ooop he almost forgot you.

Lowkey not suprised that you ended up in the hospital because of your stupidness.

“Heyyy y/n how are you?”

“Kuroo-san!”

“Y/N i told you not to do anything stupid”

“Geh nii-san”

Just like aone he’ll probably scold you while playing his games.

But not like “you should be careful” kinda scolding

He definitely state the FACTS

More like slapping you to your senses honestly.

Definitely avoid looking at your elevated leg wrapped in bandages

Kuroo would smirk on how kenma acts, he knows that he’s super worried about you.

“Tsundere”

“Huh? What did you say kuroo-san?”

“Shut up kuroo”

“Eh? Huh?”

Iwaizumi hajime

Would hit a homerun during practice.

Which almost hit oikawa and almost killed him

Sadly almost.

“Iwa-chan can i come with you to the hospital? I ~”

“Yahaba come with me”

“Where iwaizumi-san”

“Were gonna visit my dumb sister”

“IWA-CHAN?!”

He ended up with oikawa👀

Lol anyways...

You’re begging hoping that your brother would just be like “hey you ok, are you hurt?” Kind of brother

But it was iwaizumi

And there he was at the door scaring the shit out of the nurse while behind him was a cassanova who lowkey flirts with the nurses.

While he was walking towards you, you swore in your life that everybody like everybody except that bitch oikawa grew silent.

As he reaches to you, might be seeing afterlife if you answered him wrong.

“H-hey n-nii-san”

“Hiiii y/n-cha—“

Iwaizumi would cover oikawa’s mouth and just look down at you with dark eyes.

“Ahaha yeah so like I fell down the stairs I don’t know how but like slip and just went straight down, and before i knew it i was in the hospital with this leg hahaha”

You can literally decipher what he’s saying by just looking at him so u just keep on talking and giving him information about what happened until his hand that was on oikawa’s mouth squished poor Oikawa

Which made him muffled a low scream while tapping iwaizumi’s arm.

“What do you say so for yourself?”

You shivered at his cold voice considering this is the first time he talked after walking in this room.

“I’m terribly sorry for my stupidity i promise to be careful and look at where I’m going from now on”

“Good, here pudding”

You can feel he’s already calm and eventually lets go of Oikawa.

“Iwa-chan”

“What?”

“That hurts”

“I don’t care”

Nishinoya yuu

Would ask daichi and coach ukai and takeda sensei if he can skip practice.

Ofc they let him.

Dash to a near store to buy you food.

Almost got scolded at the entrance of the hospital because of constant screaming.

And was treated like a lost kid at the reception desk.

“Y/N”

“Nii-san?!”

As he walked towards you everybody was looking at him having thoughts like.

“Monkey”

“Cute kid”

“Little brother?”

“What a cute monkey”

Apparently he was holding a bunch of banana in his hand and stomping towards you.

“SORRY!!”

“EH? FOR WHAT?”

“Well earlier at our conversation”

You immediately knew what he was talking about.

He was upset about the way he joked about how he also got a broken bone.

“Nah it’s fine, whatcha got there?”

He hands over you the banana, putting at your lap and pulled a piece.

He peeled it and gave it to you and got another one for him.

All you could think of.

“Ah I want him to be my little brother but I can’t he was born ahead of me”

He was cute that’s all I’m saying.

Futakuchi kenji

He’s pissed

Also worried

But pissed

Actually both

He never thought there comes a day where your stupidity would eventually hurt you.

Well today’s the day.

After practice he would go straight to the hospital.

All frowny (is that even a word lmao)

As he arrived at your room he would open the door loudly surprising you.

You almost dropped your tangerine.

“Yo what the hell? You almost gave me a heart attack”

“WELL U ALMOST GAVE ME ONE TOO WHEN U SAID YOU WERE IN THE HOSPITAL”

You rarely see this side of him which is amusing.

Scratching his head in frustration he went up to you and slightly pushed you.

“Move”

“Ow hey what’s up with you?”

“I’m gonna sit can’t you tell?”

“There’s literally a chair over there nii-san”

“Shut up and just move”

He sat beside you at your bed and kept quiet.

“Can i have a tangerine?”

U gave him the tangerine as he popped one in his mouth.

“How can u even peel this? Your arm is broken”

“Skills”

He choked.

YES HE CHOKED

You whipped your head, predicting what he was thinking.

“HEY!!”

“I DIDN’T SAY ANYTHING”

“OH MY GOD”

It took a good few minutes before he calmed down.

You get your magazine beside your bed as he fished out his phone out of his pocket and started scrolling.

This was his way of affection, telling you he’s here.

[omg-just-peachy]

moving day

for the anon who asked: Wud you write stony or winteriron first time meeting/meet cute with "you make a good leaning post" with tired Tony leaning on one of his big brooklyn boys

1.5k, stevetony, fluff, meet cute, college au (what else, i am who i am)

“Hey, Tony, Steve says he’s like five minutes away. We should grab the keys and do one last lap around, make sure everything’s packed. Can you believe it’s our last few minutes here?” Bucky asks, looking around. They’re moving out of their college apartment today, and Tony is surprised by how sentimental his roommate turned best friend is getting.

“Thank god for that,” Tony says quickly. Of course he’s sad it’s all ending, college, the whole shebang, but he’s ready, too. He and Bucky would still be living together, for one thing, so not much was really changing there. The only difference would be their schedules: Bucky starting his MFA program and Tony working toward a PhD in Mechanical Engineering.

“We had fun,” Bucky says. It’s not a question.

“Fine, we had fun. But we’re not dying, Buck. Just moving fifteen minutes away and off this campus. The real tragedy,” Tony lifts his coffee cup, already dangerously low, “is losing the proximity to the best coffee in the city, though I think it’ll be worth the commute here to get it.”

“Yeah, yeah, you’re as stubborn as Steve, I swear. You’re gonna love him. I, for one, think you’re being this cranky because you’re sad to be leaving the haven that is 105 Broadacre, and that is the hill I will die on today.”

“I thought we agreed that dying to prove something stupid would be my thing,” an amused new voice says from the doorway.

Tony gapes. He’d been hearing about Steve Rogers, lifelong best friend of James Buchanan Barnes for four years now. He can tell you that Steve got beaten up a lot as a kid, but grew into himself in high school, that his favorite food is, of all things, banana pudding, and that his paintings are truly incredible. Tony might not know much about art, but he knows Steve’s going to be famous, and it was really more of a question of when rather than if.

But in four years, Tony had not learned that Steve Rogers, best friend of Bucky Barnes, looked like this. Blond, built, and beautiful, his formerly genius-level brain supplies for him. Bucky hadn’t been kidding when he said Steve grew into himself. Now, well over six feet tall, dressed in a worn, soft-looking flannel and jeans, Steve is gorgeous, and Tony nearly chokes on his coffee.

“Punk,” Bucky says affectionately, crossing the room to wrap his arms around his friend.

“Jerk,” Steve says, smiling broadly, and god, of course he smiles like that. Like it might split his face in two but it would have been worth it. Like he was trying to single-handedly light up the room.

Shit.

“Stevie, this is Tony. Tony, Stevie.” Bucky is clearly thrilled to be making this introduction at long last, but Tony is too worried that his hands are sweating to do more than smile and nod.

“It’s nice to meet you. Finally. I’ve heard a lot about you.” Steve says this almost teasingly, and Tony’s stomach flips.

“Good things?”

“For the most part, yeah.” Steve grins wickedly when Bucky punches him in the shoulder.

“Coffee!” Tony declares, too loud, because he has to say something, right? Jesus, since when is he so bad at this? He tries to backtrack. “I mean, uh, we got you coffee for helping us move. Some of the ice melted, but...” He all but shoves the cup at Steve.

Bucky shoots Tony a look, no doubt wondering what the hell was wrong with him, and says, slowly. “Okay, anyway. I was thinking we could do a lap and then start loading, sound good?”

Tony nods. “Yes, perfect! Maybe you could help me with, uh... DUM-e! Yes! I need help with DUM-e! Steve, we will be right back.”

Tony drags Bucky away by the wrist before Steve could inevitably ask what any of that meant.

“What is going on with y—”

“You didn’t tell me he looked like that!”

Bucky frowns. “Like what?”

“Like that! Like he graced the side of an Abercrombie bag in the not so distant past!”

Bucky barks a laugh. “You’ve seen pictures, I mean... He’s...it’s Steve.”

“I’ve seen your artsy, backlit, black and white portfolio pictures, nothing normal. If you’d just get an Instagram like I— No, this isn’t the time for that. He’s perfect, okay. I just. Is he...”

“Wondering what the fuck is wrong with you? Probably, yeah.”

“Buck!”

Bucky cackles. “Fine. He’s bi, and yes, he’s single. He’s also the only person who agreed to help us move today so please don’t scare him away before we get there, okay?”

Tony nods. “Okay. Okay, yeah. I can—yeah.” His hands still feel sweaty, though.

“Seriously, who are you, and where is the real Tony Stark?”

Steve’s voice floats down the hall, interrupting them. “Everything okay?”

Bucky calls down that they’re fine, then laughs again. “I guess I should’ve known. I did say you’d love him.”

Tony groans.

*

The rest of the day passes largely without incident. Steve helps them load and unload an ungodly amount of boxes, and Tony manages not to put his foot in his mouth.

Much.

Fine, Tony manages not to put his foot in his mouth much.

They’re unloading kitchen supplies, Tony watching Steve unwrap their sad collection of mismatched plates, and he says, inexplicably, “A snack. A whole meal, really.”

Steve’s eyebrows furrow. “What?”

Tony shakes his head, stunned to find he’s spoken this out loud. “Oh. Um, I’m starving, how about you? Buck runs a tight ship, but I think we can stop for some pizza, right?” He’s talking way too fast, but at least he’s saying something.

“Yeah, I could eat,” Steve says, smiling and pulling out his phone. “There’s a great place not too far from here, if I remember correctly...”

“Oh, yeah, you guys grew up not that far from here, right?” See, normal, Tony can do normal!

“Yeah, just uptown from here. Don’t worry, I haven’t been in New England long enough to forget the good pizza.”

“Thank god for you,” Tony says, ruining it all again.

Steve gives him an amused look, like he’s holding back the power of a real, full smile, saving it up for later.

Tony shakes his head and pulls out his own phone to order; it’s truly the least he can do.

God, where is Bucky?

*

Two hours pass, and they eat too much pizza and drink too much beer and Tony relaxes, bit by bit. Too much, probably, but he’s comfortable now, and their new apartment is warm and he’s with his best friend and the love of his life, probably. Definitely the most beautiful person he’s ever laid eyes on, and for these reasons, he’s going to ask him out.

Tony finds Steve in the kitchen, grabbing a water. He looks up and shoots Tony a smile, which he takes as a good sign. He does his best to sidle over to Steve. It sounds smooth, sidling up, but Tony’s too nervous to do more than stumble, and ends up kind of half standing, half leaning against him. Steve even feels strong.

“Hi,” Tony says.

“Hi.” The smile again, still not fully unleashed.

Tony looks up, heart racing. “You’re... um. You make a good leaning post.”

“A good leaning post,” Steve repeats. The smile growing, like it can’t be kept in much longer.

Tony nods solemnly. “Bucky told me a lot about you, too, you know.”

“Ah. And he said that? That I’m a good... leaning post?”

“Well, no, not that. That’s all me.”

Steve laughs and Tony ascends, a little bit. “You know what else Buck said about you?”

‘Oh no, what?”

“That you’re not always so bad at flirting, but to definitely give you a chance when you inevitably ask me out.”

Tony was going to kill him.

“...Oh, and not to tell you he said that.”

Tony can’t help but laugh. Really, there’s nowhere to go but up from here. He sucks in a breath. “I’m usually very smooth,” he agrees. “And, you know, I would hate it if I didn’t live up to what Bucky said about me.”

“It’s tough to let people down,” Steve nods.

“So...do you want to grab dinner sometime? Not pizza, though the pizza was incredible, I just... I would take you somewhere nice.”

Steve grins. “That sounds nice,” he says, laying a hand on Tony’s forearm. “And for what it’s worth, I like this version of you.”

Before Tony can stammer out a response, Bucky strolls into the kitchen, clocks Steve’s hand on Tony’s arm and shakes his head. “I created a monster.”

(formidable fluff prompts)

[faustonastring]

main 6 with an mc who acts like a grandma? like straight down to their bones creak when they stand, idk :),,, (side note, your writing is so good holy mother of faust)

Thanks for requesting! (And the compliment!) I hope you like it! Just a disclaimer, I’ve never had a grandma like figure in my life, so this may be very stereotypical or a little wrong, so apologies if it’s a little off, (I’m also very tired, so sorry for the mistakes !)

Request are open!!!!!

Main six with a Mc that acts like a grandma!

Asra

He finds it oddly enchanting, but just because he finds it enchanting don’t think your gonna be left off the hook, he’s still going to (lovingly) make fun of you for it. (So will faust)

If you carry mints or hard candies with you, he falls in love all over again, and he’ll buy you some that you can keep in your stash as a way to apologize for eating them all, (one day he was sucking on one and you made him laugh, he almost choked to death, so now he’s only aloud to eat what ever is the vesuvia equilvant to life savers)

He’ll try to make you some sort of potion or spell to stop you’re bones from cracking, he doesn’t mind, but it kinda weirds him out if it’s a really good one, like the ones that just sound like something just snapped in half-

Like I said before he’ll tease you for it. A lot. He’ll ask you if you need help crossing the street, or going up/down the stairs, asking if you can read the menu alright or if you need your reading glasses, or if you can’t hear him he’ll ask if you need your hearing aid. (Just to clarify again, he does this lovingly.)

Nadia

Nadia is quite old her self. Though she’s most likely in her mid to late forties, she’s not at grandma age, yet. But that doesn’t mean her sisters aren’t. Or even better. Her parents.

She doesn’t mind really, she finds it kind of nostalgic in a way, that is until you start complaing. Don’t start complaing please if you do it too much you’re going to start reminding her of not only her ancient family members but her ex husband too, who looks thirty but acts like he’s sixty.

She mentions trying to do yoga to help minimize the god awful bone cracking noises, but might have to leave the room because there is no way those noises are natural. If all else fails she’ll take you to a chiropractor (ya know, those people who rearrange- crack your bones for you)

She isn’t one to tease you, but her family is, but it’s not really teasing it’s more like comparing you to them, in their old age, and how worst your going to get when your older. (Also off topic but please keep hard candies with you for Volta. She can have some hard candy. As a treat.)

Julian

Remember when I said Nadia felt slight nostalgia? Its like that. But times ten. I mean the man was raised by grandmas for a decent portion of his life, but that’s not a turn of or any thing no, no, no, it makes him feel at home.

Some of you are going to kill me for this, but it’s been proven that men tend to have a habit of falling in love with people who remind them of their mother, so if julians equlivant of a mother was a bunch of grandmas.....well aren’t you in luck

All jokes aside, he’s kind of the same way, again he was raised by grandmas, Portia and him embodie diffrent aspects of a grandma I feel like, but we’ll get to her in a minute. Julian though, his bones crack. Often. And it’s an ungodly noise too, and he also likes to keep hard mints, (or like those strawberry hard candies I feel like) on him at all times. I feel like he also can’t hear for shi-

You two tease each other for it, and you get bonus points if you fight like an old married couple, you two will make little bets like who ever can go the longest with out popping a bone wins, the loser has to buy you both pints at the rowdy raven, or top also it isn’t uncommon for one of your bones to crack while having sex I’m just saying-

Portia

I feel like the ship wreck happened when Portia was too young to fully remember her parents, so the grandmas that raised her is (other than Julian) the only family she’s ever had, but don’t worry, because she’s had a lot of practice cracking those stubborn bones that just won’t sit right-

She’s learned a lot from being raised by grandmas, like how to make banana bread crumb pudding, or bake a pie, or correctly tend to a garden, etc etc etc, but that’s about the extent of her grandma duties, unlike her ancient brother her bones don’t crack every time she moves.

Please keep some hard candy with you for her, it’s a nice little pick me up for when you come to visit her at the palace, it’s also a great way to bribe her to get some juicy gossip, or to get her to top/bottom which ever you prefer, she’s most definitely a switch ( you get bonus points if it’s one of those strawberry hard candies I mentioned earlier. She’s the whole reason Julian started keeping some on him)

She tease you a lot for it, but if anyone. And I mean anyone were to make fun of you for it that’s not her, well she’s already pulling her hair back up

Muriel

At first he thinks this is just how normal people act. (He doesn’t get out much, in case you didn’t already know) but then he starts to realize that only you act like that. Which he doesn’t mind. He likes you. You’re weird. He likes that. But then he hears your bones crack, and oh god, he thinks something’s wrong.

He thinks he broke you. Espically if he was holding you or hugging you, or hell even touching you, and your body made an ungodly crack noise. He kind of just stares there in confusion and fear because you just brushed it off, but that sound like it hurt, and you just let it happen??? And it happens all the time?? (Wait till he finds out about periods all my afab babes out there. Hahaha, good luck Charlie)

He does get used to it eventually,but if your bones were to ever crack from moving or standing up, he’ll simply say “stop that” but he says it with a small smile on his lips. And if your having a particular bad day with the cracks, he’ll very shyly ask if there’s any thing he can do....like maybe a massage?

If you’re ever hiking with him and your knees start cracking, he without question will carry you to your destination, and pretends he doesn’t hear you if you try to protest. But why would you?

Lucio

He sees himself in you. It’s terrifying, but he’s a narcissist so he’s kind of into it-

Look like I said before, he looks like he’s thirty but he acts like he’s sixty, ( I was gonna say eighty but I was feeling generous) and six at the same time. His bones crack a lot. He hates it. He’s really insecure about it. But he hates it less when he realiszes yours do it too.

I feel like lucio also has poor eye sight and is a little hard of hearing, (either that or he’s never listening) but refuses to get treated for it, so if you fit into either of those categories, and get treated for it, he might cave and do it too. He also thinks you look hot in glasses, and buys you like twelve different pairs.

You two most definitely fight like an old married couple. Sorry I don’t make the rules. The palace staff starts to make bets on when your getting a divorce, but they just don’t understand the level of intimacy it takes to lovingly fight with some one over every little thing. (That’s what true love looks like baby)

Also keep hard candies on you at all times. Not for you for him, because if you give him one once, he’ll ask for it again and again and again, it’s like if you give a mouse a cookie, (if you ever read that growing up,)

Thanks for reading! I’m really tired so sorry about all the typos and mistakes, if you want me to rewrite it or fix it when I’m fully awake I Will! Sorry it’s my bad for pushing it off so long! Any way I hope you enjoyed!

Next headcanon: main six reacting to mc wanting to start a family. (5/22)

Request are open! :)

[skrltwtch]

Sleep Talk

Prompt: Persons A and B are cuddling on the couch together watching a movie late at night. Person B (who tends to sleep talk) falls asleep, and A doesn’t notice. B begins saying progressively weirder stuff until they finally mutter “I love you.�� A internally freaks out and grabs B’s hand, then says, “I love you, too.” Person B wakes up confused and terrified because it was the first time they ever said “I love you” to each other. (Source of prompt in link at bottom of post.)

Word count: 2,026 words

Author's note: Spoilers for Wonder Woman. I also didn't quite follow the prompt to a T.

∘₊✧──────✧₊∘

‘It’s movie night!’ I said in a sing-song voice upon entering the living room, fresh out of the shower and in my best jammies, a set cut from cat-printed periwinkle blue cloth. George, sadly, wasn’t wearing his matching set. Shame; I’d packed this set with the intention of us spending this iteration of a three-year-old tradition in couple jammies. That’d have been such a sight — and the Instagram story.

‘The best night of the week — which also happens to be Friday night,’ he said, grinning. He patted the space next to him. ‘Saved you a seat. Best one in the house.’

‘Thank you, my darling.’ I put down the bowl of popcorn mixed with funfetti and chocolate, a recipe I nicked off the Internet, and bottle of Coke, and joined him on the couch, its real estate reduced to fit us both as snugly as bugs in a rug by all the pillows he’d added to the living room’s already hefty count. His idea of home improvement made it difficult for me to ever want to leave this couch and live life off of it. Could I put in a request to work from home like this next week? Senior management were strong advocates of ‘flexible arrangements’ and ‘work-life balance’ after all, and none were more deserving of the latter after the week’s events than I.

‘What are you in the mood for?’

‘What are you in the mood for? It’s your turn this week to choose,’ he said.

‘I was being democratic.’

‘For once, you can pretend my opinion doesn’t matter.’

‘“For once”?’

‘Oi.’ He sank deeper into his seat.

The corners of my mouth ached from chortling a little too much at his expense. I almost choked, actually, to which he said under his breath, ‘Karma’, his face gleaming with smug glee. Fair enough.

I reached for the remote and also handed him the popcorn to keep his mouth busy while I picked our poison; I knew, too, that what he’d said about his opinion not mattering this time had to be a bluff. George? Not having an opinion about movies? The next Pope being Buddhist was far likelier. I counted myself fortunate that we had similar tastes.

So, what was I feeling this week? Last week was Ingrid Goes West, which reinforced his decision to stay the fuck away from social media and reinforced my crush on Elizabeth Olsen. It was one of the unspoken rules to not repeat genres to keep things interesting. If there were no such rule, I’d have watched the entirety of Netflix’s sci-fi thrillers, and he its dark comedies, twice over. I navigated to the superhero movies section. I wanted something loud, light, and that wasn’t too long because of the late start.

The cursor found itself on Wonder Woman. Excellent: it was familiar — this would be our second time watching; we had no compunctions about re-watching stuff on movie night, as long as it was within ‘reason’ (whatever that meant — for instance, watching Thor: Ragnarok five times was perfectly acceptable to me) — and didn’t require a tremendous amount of cerebral effort to follow. It was what the doctor ordered for capping off a long, pretty shitty week. I needed the reminder that it was possible, and worthwhile, to find hope in and remain optimistic about such a bleak, ugly world. Besides, what was more cathartic than watching a superheroine, the world’s first, doing her thing in a movie that was, for the most part, also tastefully done? I didn’t want to enter the weekend continuing feeling like shit, so I hit play without further ado.

‘Hey, don’t finish that,’ I said to George, who’d been popping fistfuls of kernels and chocolates into his mouth like there wasn’t a finite supply.

‘You were taking so long to decide.’

‘I’ve decided!’ I gestured at the Warner Bros logo that flashed on-screen.

‘I’m hungry.’ His pout signalled the being of a sulk. ‘We don’t usually start this late …’

I put down the remote and curled up next to him. Our arms made their way onto each other’s bodies: mine across his abdomen, and his over my shoulder. He took my hand and lay a soft kiss on my fingers before setting it back down on his lower stomach, where he preferred it belonged. Fine by me. I burrowed deeper into his side. His scent, fresh and a little sweet from all the candy he’d taken, provided warm solace, as always.

‘I’m sorry,’ I said. ‘It wouldn’t have if I hadn’t been made to stay late.’

His fingertips skimmed the curve of my jawline. ‘It’s okay. I was kidding. I know your manager’s a prick with no respect for other people’s time,’ he said. A finger landed on my lip; it tasted faintly of vanilla. ‘Now, shh. Movie’s started.’

For something we’d watched before, Wonder Woman continued to hold our attention. Neither of us succumbed to the temptation of checking our phones nor started conversing with each other about our day, whether the Internet would implode if Chris Pine were to ever join the Marvel Cinematic Universe, weekend plans, whatever. None of that was verboten on movie night. Our attention spans weren’t perfect, and we’d never pretend they were; and some movies, like it or not, were better enjoyed as background noise in the comfort of one’s home. Sometimes we could accomplish so much on movie nights.

‘How’d you think I’d look in that?’ George piped up during the famous No Man’s Land sequence.

‘In what?’

‘Her outfit.’

‘That’s something you could consider for next Halloween.’

He grunted.

‘I’d love to see it.’

‘I want cheese. Cheese in bread. Cheese on bread. Pizza?’

‘You can’t be that hungry.’ I patted his stomach. It emitted a loud, watery rumble.

‘’m puckish.’

‘“Peckish”?’

‘That’s what I said.’ His speech had a slurred quality to it.

‘There’s still popcorn left.’

‘Not chicken wings.’ How’d wings come into the picture? ‘Or Sprite.’

‘Gross, Sprite.’

Despite his and his stomach’s grievances, he didn’t take the popcorn or Coke, or get up to order whatever it was that he wanted. I wasn’t about to surrender the position into which I’d worked myself. Likewise, I was genuinely into Wonder Woman (I attributed that to the fatigue I felt toward all things Marvel after Endgame and my excitement for Wonder Woman 1984) to consider taking any interruptions in my stride. His stomach did stop its fussing after a while.

‘Are my Neopets dead? Is there a Neopets Heaven?’

I didn’t answer. I didn’t know how to. Because he didn’t need to know I was still on Neopets and could therefore tell him with full confidence that no, Neopets wouldn’t starve to death, and no, the concepts of death and Heaven didn’t, and would never, exist on the site because its staff continued to delude themselves about the average age of their current userbase. Look, I put in too much work on my account, which I’d had since the site’s inception, to simply let it rot in the site’s current state of virtual limbo. Actually, maybe I should come clean and reintroduce him to the site … it was getting a little lonely for little ol’ me in Neopia.

‘What do you think happens to Tamagotchi when they die?’

Okay, what the fuck.

I peeled my gaze off of Gal Gadot — a herculean task — and looked up at him. Oh, God. He really was the old man he proclaimed himself to be. I let him sleep. He, too, had had a rough week at work, and I needed him at his best for what we had planned for the weekend … which, for now, was nothing. I was planning for the both of us to work on it when Wonder Woman entered standard blockbuster fare territory! Once again, work had thrown a monkey wrench into the fine-tuned machinery that constituted our countdown to the weekend: sending texts about weekend plans to each other during office hours and bringing them to fruition once our asses found themselves out the door at six o’clock and not a second later. This was called making efficient use of our time at work. Our managers should be so proud.

George’s sleep talking soon eclipsed Wonder Woman in terms of entertainment value. Frankly, Wonder Woman lost its lustre in its third act, where the filmmakers attempted to convince the audience that Remus Lupin and the fearsome Greek god of war were one and the same. That moustache? In what universe —? The nerve of Patty Jenkins, expecting me to extend my suspension of disbelief to such lengths.

Tonight’s highlights included:

‘Fucking parrots, always stealing my hot dogs in the park.’

‘I am not eating that banana without a fork.’

‘Look, that dog is wearing a tea cosy on its head.’ (I really would’ve loved to see this.)

‘Dad’s going to regret not letting mom pursue that degree in apartment science.’

When I couldn’t resist and asked him what apartment science was: ‘You know, when an apartment and science love each other very much …’

‘Government’s come out and made sex on bicycles illegal. That is a goddamn shame.’

‘Pudding’s never hurt anyone. Not physically, not emotionally.’

I was … a little fascinated, honestly. His episodes, as moderate as their occurrences were, tended to consist of brief, simple sentences and max out at four or five. Did I need to be concerned? Or was work taking a heavier toll on him than he’d let on? That was it: our weekend was going to revolve around relaxation. The beach! Massages! Studio Ghibli on Netflix! Spending the entirety of either day in bed was a need, a must; I wouldn’t care to hear otherwise.

‘I love you.’

‘I love you, George.’ I rested my head on his chest and interlaced my fingers with his.

The realisation of what the words that’d left our lips, been said in our voices, and hung in the air above our heads, begging, screaming, to be acknowledged, were drove me to undo what I did and pause the movie. Why did that sound so … natural? Why was I even questioning this? Our relationship — what we had — wasn’t invalid because those words hadn’t been said — until now, where ‘now’ happened to be borne of a sleep talking episode. Love didn’t have an on-off switch. The things we did together, the things we did for each other, the things we did to each other, said volumes louder about what we were than those three words.

Still, it felt fucking magical.

George stirred next to me. ‘Has it ended?’

‘No.’

He snuffled. ‘Did I fall asleep?’

‘Yeah.’

‘Shit. Did you stop because I —’

How was that sentence supposed to have ended? Because he talked in his sleep? Because of what he said? Do you know what you said, and did you mean it? I wanted to ask. His recollection of what he said while unconscious was a crapshoot; at least it wasn’t convenient whenever it might suit him — like now, perhaps. And I did. I meant what I said. Come on, Y/N. Don’t sweep this under the rug. Don’t play it off as a joke. Do it. Ask him. We were adults, whether or not we liked it. I couldn’t have the weekend start on a note like this.

He pressed me closer to him. His lips brushed the top of my head. ‘I’m an idiot for not saying it sooner — or more often, and when I’m awake,’ he said. ‘I love you. I love you. I love you. It sounds divine.’

Heat danced across my cheeks. ‘It does, doesn’t it?’ Our palms touched. ‘I love you,’ I said softly. ‘I love you, George MacKay.’

I resumed the movie, both better able and more unable to focus on it now. There wasn’t much left to it. Chris Pine had long left the picture, as my interest would’ve, too, notwithstanding what’d transpired.

‘What else did I say?’

‘You wanted to know if your Neopets are dead.’

‘Oh. Well, are they? Can you help me check?’

‘Why are you asking me?’

‘I know you still play.’

[pocketramblr]

gonna write a dramatic poem about how my throat closes up around too bitter and too sweet bites and its gonna sound meaningful but really its just about how i almost choked on this banana pudding

[iliketowrite1996]

Tying Shoelaces and New Faces 15

TRIGGER WARNINGS AND THEMES- Breaking up, taking a break, ignoring a significant other, insecurities, paranoia, disapproval of parent. 

once again, @chaneajoyyy was a huge help!

A break.

   That’s what you and T’Challa had decided on.

   A break.

   Well. that’s what you decided. That it’s best for you, him, and your relationship if you take a break. He’d reluctantly agreed, knowing that once you makeup your mind, there's little to no use in trying to persuade you away from your decision.    

So he finds himself distracting himself. It’s June and he’s enjoying walking around Wakanda with his family and friends.

   ‘’See that spot over there, Autumn,’’ Nakia tells their daughter, ‘’That used to be my favorite restaurant all of Wakanda. My parents took me there all of the time.’’

   ‘’Wow!,’’ Autumn looks up to her mother, ‘’Can we go there?’’

   ‘’Sure, as soon as my parents meet up with us.’’

   They’ve only been in Wakanda for two days, and Autumn is already fascinated by everything. Her eyes are wide as they walk through the streets. She sees people making clothing, weaving vibranium into it. She hear the sound of people laughing and bargaining to lower prices. She smells the spices and the foods that waft through the street. She tastes a hunger to learn more, even at four-years-old. She’s an explorer, just like her mother. T’Challa doubts she’ll stay in one place when she gets older. Just like her mother.

   But she’s four and she still has a lot of growing up to do, so T’Challa doesn’t even begin to entertain the thought of his baby girl leaving the nest any time soon.

   No, not yet.

   She’s fascinated with the kimoyo beads that Nakia is wearing, and she waves at her grandparents, both sets, as they alert them that they are on the way to meet them for lunch.

   T’Chaka rented out the private room of a restaurant as soon as the vacation plans were finalized.

   Right now, T’Challa doesn’t want t be bothered. The only people he can actually stomach being around are Autumn, and… well, that’s about it.

   N‘Jadaka and Sanaa have barely left their hotel room since they got here. And they're not even doing anything- just watching movies and ordering room service, enjoying their first vacation together.

   Ugh.

   His mother and baba are looking at all of the sights, reliving all of the good memories that they have made in their beautiful homeland.

   Shuri is always on her phone, instant messaging Peter about new ideas. When she’s not, truth, she’s hanging out with Autumn.

   Even his uncle N’Jobu has brought his newest girlfriend, a woman he grew up with here in Wakanda.

   It all makes T’Challa think one thing- he messed up with you, and he messed up big time.

   He just wishes that he could pinpoint the source of your insecurity, your discomfort with this relationship.

   ‘’Hey, cuz,’’ N’Jadaka speaks as he and Sanaa enter the  restaurant, hand in hand.

   ‘’Erik!.’’ Autumn cries as if she hadn't seen him only yesterday, pushing away from the table ,running and leaping into Erik’s arms.

   ‘’Hey, Little Bit! Have you grown since yesterday?!’’

   ‘’Mommy and baba say I’m getting bigger all of the time!,’’ Autumn nods enthusiastically, ‘’I can tie my shoes all by myself because baba’s girlfriend taught me!’’

   He does his best not to show how much hearing about you breaks his heart at the moment. He’s excellent at putting on facades, and so he does so now. He ignores the way Nakia glances at him and keeps it moving.

   ‘’She sure can tie her shoes! No more velcro straps for baba’s little girl!’’

   The rest of the family piles i, and , like most family dinners, it’s loud, hilarious, and more than a bit uncomfortable.    

   ‘’Shuri, your uncle N'Jobu has told me so much about you,’’ N’Jobu Udaku’s girlfriend stares, ‘’He says that you are looking to graduate early?’’

   ‘’I am,’’ Shuri sets her water glass down, ‘’I am due to graduate in December, and I have chosen to go to NYU in the spring, should I be accepted.’’

   At that, T’Chaka chokes on his own water, ‘’I thought your dream was to come here and go to the University of Wakanda?’’

   Shuri shrugs, nonchalantly, ‘’Things happen to change, baba.’’

   ‘’This wouldn't have to do with your nerdy boyfriend, would it,’’ N’Jadaka teases, but there’s a hint of seriousness to it.

   ‘’Peter has nothing to do with my decision. N’Jadaka,’’ she rolls her eyes playfully, ‘’I do know that he’s planning on going there but this decision was made without him in mind. I just feel like my calling may be there.’’

   ‘’Instead of here,’’ T’Chaka finishes for her, obviously upset.

   ‘’Rest assured, baba, I applied here as well. Where my path will actually end up taking me, I do not know. I just hope that you’d all be supportive,’’ the second youngest member of the Udaku family says pointedly.

   The tension is quite thick and could be cut with a knife. Thankfully, Nakia’s mother breaks the silence.    

   ‘’And who is this lovely girl, N’Jadaka,’’ the older woman eyes Sanaa.

   ‘’This is my girlfriend, Sanaa,’’ N’Jadaka states proudly, ‘’We’ve been dating for almost a year. It'll be a year in November.’’

   ‘’Then it’s not almost a year,’’ Sanaa jokes, ‘’It’s only June!’’

   ‘’Why you do me like that?’’

   ‘’As you can seem,’’ N’Jobu states, ‘’They are a match made perfectly. I’ve never seen anyone that can match N’Jadaka’s intelligence, humor, and pettiness.’’

   ‘’Hey!,’’ the two lovebird chorus.

   ‘’Baba, what’s pettiness,’’ Autumn questions, the almost-five-year-old looking up at her baba in confusion.

   ‘’Intomba, pettiness is what you and your cousin Erik and Miss Sanaa are both very good at.’’

   Autumn is without a doubt the most loving child. She’s the sweetest person that T’Challa has ever met in his life. However, his little girl is a tad bit petty, and he doesn’t know if N’Jadaka or Shuri are to blame.

   ‘’Ohh, okay,’’ the kindergartner needs, satisfied with hat answer.

   ‘’So, Sanaa, what do you do for a living,’’ Nakia’s dad questions.

   ‘’Oh, she’s  a middle school teacher,’’ T’Chaka states, turning to Nakia, ‘’Isn’t that something that you were interested in as well?’’

   ‘’Yes.When I was 14,’’ Nakia says politely yet pointed, ‘I’m sorry, Sanaa, what do you teach?’’

   ‘’I teach sixth, seventh, and eighth grade science. In the accelerated program. I’m also the coach of the dance team,’’ she admits, ‘’And I’m trying to get a workshop started to help girls improve their self-esteem, and eventually for boys, too.’’

   ‘’Looks like you  have a lot going for yourself,’’ Ramonda responds with a soft smile,unaware as to how talented and well-rounded her nephew’s girlfriend interests are.

   ‘’That’s a matter of opinion.’’

   ‘’To be fair, Mr. Udaku,’’ Sanaa turns to T’Chaka, ‘’I do what I do because I care about helping the children. Not impressing anyone else.’’

   The awkwardness comes back, and as usual, two people at the table are completely oblivious- T’Challa and Autumn.

   And, really, only the four-year-old has the excuse.

   So again, T’Challa is one step further from seeing the true cause of tension in your relationship.

   He’s two steps further from doing anything about it.

   And he’s three steps further from ever winning you back…

   Until he makes the step in the right direction.

   That’s what you’re screwing over now as you spread out your ingredients, separating the dry items from the  wet items. You’ve already baked a peach cobbler, a banana pudding, and an apple pie.

   You’re getting started on your fourth dessert when your phone rings. You sigh, wiping your hands on your apron and answering the call.

   ‘’Hello?’’

   ‘’Hey, girl. How have you been.’’

   That velvety, familiar, smooth voice makes you freeze instantly, but a smile spreads across your face like butter on a roll-easily and meant to be there.

   ‘’Hey, Lucas! How have you been?’’

   ‘’Oh, you know, here and there. Where the road takes me. But I’m in town tonight. Gonna be here for about a week. Was wondering’ if I could maybe see you tonight?’’

   Here’s how it usually goes- you and Lucas have been friends since freshman year of college. He sat next to you in the dining hall, started talking about how boring your shared class of freshman level English was, and you’ve been friends ever since. He is the definition of handsome in your book- his round, brown eyes are soulful. His ‘’coffee with cream’’ (his words, not your own)  skin stretches across a defined jaw and his curls always look bright and moisturized.

   You’ve always found him attractive, and he’s always thought you were beautiful. He has told you so on many occasions, none of which wherever appropriate. Such as when you and a group of friends went to your college’s homecoming dance and he told you, ‘’You’re always stunning’’. In front of your date. And his.

   Not to mention the time that he blurted it out in math class when you two were supposed to eb solving problems given by your professor together.

   Then again, subtlety has never been his strong suit. If he likes something, the world will soon know. If he dislikes something, he turns into the town crier and shoots it out for all to hear. He’s always been like that concerning politics, social events, movies, music, food, people…

   And especially you.

   Maybe that’s why the two of you have a… history together.

   He asked you out the summer between your freshman and sophomore year of college. It was a spur of the moment thing, as far as you were concerned. Little did you know that he’d been planning it for a while.

   See, he was gonna be all romantic. He was gonna get you flowers and dress up real nice and ask you at the charity banquet that you were attending with him that night.

   Instead, he asked you that morning, when you were sitting on his couch, dressed in sweats and a t-shirt and playing video games with him.

   He is not ashamed to admit that, as typical as it may sound, he had never seen you look so beautiful.

   The two of you dated for five years after that, and breaking up was the hardest thing. But he wanted to travel and work for his mother's charity, and that wasn’t your life. SO you broke up, but you remain friends. It’s why you can understand how T’Challa is friends with Nakia.

   Then again, you never married Lucas and had a kid with him, and his parents never made you feel awful while he sat there and did nothing.

   But that’s a duty for a different day.

   You agree, requesting for an hour to change and dress up. You quickly store the baked goods, clean your area, and rush off to the bathroom.

   After a quick wash up, you step into the same dress that you wore to the gala with T’Challa. Your makeup is done in that smoky eye look you know Lucas loves and your lipstick is fire engine red.

   He’s knocking on the door by the time that you’re slipping into your heels, and you answer it with a smile.

   ‘’How do you manage to look more and more sunning every time I see you?!’’

   You laugh at that, hugging him and kissing his cheek as he does the same to you, ‘’I should be asking you the same thing! Who you modeling for? Come on, show me that runway walk.’’

   Lucas does his best to put on a mini fashion show for you, strutting up and down the living room a few times before you both dissolve into laughter.

   ‘’Oh, I’ve missed you,’’ you hug him again, ‘’I’ve got so much to catch you up on!’’

   ‘’You sure do,’’ he raises an eyebrow, ‘’You’re dating THE T’Challa Udaku? Moving on up from me, huh?’’

   The bitter taste that began the night you decided that you and T'Challa needed a break returns, and you nearly feel sick to your stomach.

   Lucas catches on fairly quickly, and attempts to amend the situation before it can burst apart any further, ‘’Or we don’t have to talk about it. We can talk about anything else. You can get your mind off of him for one night.’’

   ‘’That would be lovely,’’ you sigh, grabbing your purse, keys, and the phone.

   You take the arm that he offers, looping your arm through his.    

   You’re ready for a night on the town, and to have fun at this charity event as Lucas’ impromptu date. You’re ready to kick your heels off and dance with him, inevitably when anything that you two danced to in college comes on.

   But most importantly, you’re ready to forget about T’Challa.

   At least for one night.

   Because forgetting about him at all is a task in and of itself.

   ‘’Nakia, where are we going again?’’

   T’Challa has had his phone turned off all day. Just to resist the urge to text you. He saw you post a few f the cakes and pies and treats that you made last night on social media, and he know that this means one thing: you’re stressed.

   He’s most likely the cause of that stress…

   But he simply wishes to know why that is.    

   ‘’I told you. You need to be distracted from your phone and I’ve got someone that I want you to meet.’’

   ‘’I want to spend time with my daughter.’’

   ‘’She’s literally asleep, T’Challa. So is your girlfriend,’’ she shrugs, ‘’Now come on.’’

   He begrudgingly follows his ex-wife into the restaurant, wishing that he was at home, asleep, just like his daughter. In his own bed and away from other people that he really, eally doesn’t want to be interacting with because they are not you. 

   Until he sees who it is he’s meeting.

   Nakia and T’Challa made one trip to Wakanda right before she discovered that she was pregnant with Autumn. She introduced him to her friends Ayo, W’Kabi, and M’Baku, and he introduced her to Okoye. The small group of friends now has a group chat, meets up whenever one or more of them are in the same area, and just generally keeps in touch.

    But seeing them all here together after five years?

   That’s something special.

   So hugs are given and polite greetings are exchanged. Hands clap backs and cheeks are kissed and everyone is son sitting down at the table, the six friends catching up.

   ‘’How’s my favorite little girl?,’’ Okoye questions, leaning into W’Kabi.

   ‘’She’s doing well. She’s excited to start kindergarten.,’’ Nakia begins.

   ‘’She also apparently has a boyfriend. Tony Stark’s kid.’’

   ‘’Aww, they grow up so face,’’ Ayo chuckles for, her spot next to ,M’Baku.

   ‘’I’m sorry, I just can’t help but notice this new couple alert,’’ T’Challa raises an eyebrow as he gestures at W’Kabi and Okoye, ‘’When?’’

   ‘’Two months ago,’’ W’Kabi answers.

   ‘’Officially two months ago. We began seeing each other, and, well, others, four months prior to that.’’

   ‘’Okay, I see you,’’ Nakia chuckles, already picking up on Sanaa and yours habits.

   ‘’Anyway,’’ M’baku begins, ‘’So, where are N’Jadka and his girlfriend?’’

   ‘’Aww, I knew ya’ll would be bored without us.’’

   As if on cue, N’Jadaka and Sanaa stroll in, hand in hand.    

   And T’Challa is happy for his cousin and Sanaa, he really is. He just can't help but think that could have been the two of you had he brought you to Wakanda.

   You assume that he’s ashamed of you. He’s not. He is so in love with you, and he wants the world to know.

   The reason he didn’t invite only on this trip?

   Nakia.

   No, there’s nothing happening between him and Nakia. For reasons he’s still not completely aware of, that relationship sunk along time ago. It’s for the best, though, because you make him happy.

   But Nakia was his first real love and the mother of his child. So when she suggested this trip to Wakanda, he agreed. They both agreed to raise Autumn together, as much as they can do that with how often Nakia is away. So any time the three of them can manage to spend some time together, they go for it. He didn't invite you not so you wouldn’t get in the way of him and Nakia…

   Instead, it was because he wanted to be as present as possible. Nakia will be taking care of Autumn for all of July. He will miss his baby girl’s fifth birthday, her experience events that only take place in Wakanda, and so much more. Nakia also does not get enough time with Autumn. She knows Autumn adores you, and you adore her. So maybe, just maybe, he feared Autumn would give you more attention than Nakia and he wanted to prevent all parties from being hurt.

   Now that he’s thinking about it, if he had communicated this to you, you probably would have seen his side of things and agreed.

   He thinks about that all night, stewing over it even as his friends and cousin enjoy their dinner. He’s participating, though. He laughs and jokes with them.

   He just can't stop thinking about you, though.

   It’s when dessert is near that Nakia gets a call and excuses herself outside.

   When she returns, she’s holding the hand of a man who is about the same height as T’Challa, with dark skin and kinky curls.

   ‘’Hello, everyone. This is Kevin. My boyfriend.’’

   Oh. Her boyfriend.

   So that’s who she’s been giggling about when she’s messaging.

   T'Challa is the first to stand, bringing the other man in for a hug, ‘’It’s nice to meet you. I’m T’Challa.’’

   T’Challa is very much someone who likes his boundaries, but he can’t help himself. This is the man that makes Nakia happy, because she wouldn’t be with him if he didn’t. So if he makes Nakia happy, well, then, he’s good enough for T’Challa.

   So more greetings and pleasantries are changed. Then T’Challa, N’Jadaka, Sanaa, Nakia, Kevin, Ayo, M’Baku, W'Kabi and Okoye have dessert and talk and laugh some more.

   T’Challa goes back to his room in high spirits that night, grateful for the distraction. He decides it’s time to message you. To tell you that he wants to speak to you when he gets home.

   Instead, he goes to social media.

   There, he sees a candid photo of you and some man he doesn't know, but you two obviously know each other.

   He can see it in the way the man’ hand is reign on the small of your back. He is looking at you with an expression akin to adoration as you throw your head back, laughing.

   Okay. So that’s how it is.

   He tries not to be hurt. After all, you two are on a break, right? You can have guy friends.

   Or… did a break turn into a break up real quick and he didn’t notice?

   He asks the same question to N’Jadaka at breakfast the next day, pulling his cousin aside to consult him.

   ‘’Bruh. BRUH. What, are we in high school again? You’re worried over nothing. This is a picture, T’Challa.’’

   ‘’A picture speaks, a thousand words, N’Jadaka.’’

   ‘’And what are the saying to you, then, cousin,’’ N’Jadaka crosses his arms in front of himself.    

   ‘’They’re lying to me, I’d better do something to see how to resolve my relationship. And fast.’’

   DISCLAIMER- I OWN NO MARVEL CHARACTERS, OR THEIR FICTIONAL WORLD,S UNIVERSES, CITIES OR COUNTRIES. I own Autumn, Sanaa, Kevin and Lucas as my original characters. 

@ashanti-notthesinger​ @destinio1​ @afraiddreamingandloving​ @starsshines-blog​ @airis-paris14​ @syreanne​ @chaneajoyyy​ @90sinspiredgirl​ @shemiahsmelanin @zillmonger @skysynclair19 @bidibidibombaclaat @marvelpotterlove @constantlycravingtheunknown @imaginewhoever @wakanda-inspired @pocmarvelworks @theunsweetenedtruth @dreampovx @adrioola21

SNEAK PEEK OF NEXT CHAPTER- TRIGGER WARNINGS AND THEMES: Mentions of pregnancy, parental disapproval of significant other, insecurity, revenge, and pettiness. 

You know what you’re doing is petty and wrong, but you don’t too much mind right now. T’Challa has definitely been watching your story on social media. Which definitely means that he’s seeing your pictures.

    Okay, let’s get one thing straight. It’s not your attention to hurt T’Challa. Or maybe it is , because he’s hurting you… you don’t know. You just know that Lucas has come along for a visit and he's making you feel extra special. It’s why you’re posting different pics with him. It started off innocent enough but this last post…

    It was out of pure malice.

    It features Lucas whispering something in your ear, and you’re eyes are cast down, smiling shyly.

    ‘’You know you’re wrong for this right,’’ Lucas tells you, lounging across your couch and scrolling through his own social media feed.

    ‘’I know, I know. I’ll delete it,’’ you sigh, raising your thumb to do just that.

    ‘’Delete it because you want to. Not because I told you it was petty and childish.’’

    ‘’You ain’t say all that!’’

    ‘’My facial expression did!,’’ he points at his unamused face, to which you roll your eyes.

    ‘’Babe,’’ he sits up, using the nickname he uses on you, Sanaa… all of his close female friends, ‘’Does he even know why you’re mad?’’

    ‘’He should! He acts like he doesn’t know what his dad is doing.’’

    ‘’Okay, here me out,’’ Lucas raises his hands in front of himself,’’Maybe… he really doesn’t see it.’’

    ‘’How could he not see the fact that his dad doesn’t like me?!’’

    ‘’From what you tell me, T’Challa idolizes his dad. He wants to be as good as a dd and as good as a husband and as good as a businessman as eh sees his dad being.’’   

    ‘’And?’’

    ‘’And… he idolizes him, yeah? So he probably doesn't see his flaws as clearly as someone who is able to see T’Chaka Udaku for what he is-a flawed human. Just like the rest of that.’’

    Your bite your bottom lip and focus your eyes on the photo of you and Sanaa in college that hangs on the wall, wondering why you didn’t think of this before.

    ‘’Besides. I don’t think you're mad at him,’’  Lucas leans back, ‘’I think you're mad at yourself and you don’t know if you can trust him.’’

    ‘’Oh, you’re the expert now,’’ you try to keep the venom form your voice, ‘’Do tell me why.’’

    ‘’You were hesitant because you know T’Challa and Nakia still love each other, even if they aren't in love with each other, and they are taking their daughter on vacation. Strike one.’’

    ‘’Go on,’’you lean against the armrest of the couch.

    ‘’You also see how he's with his dad, and it makes you question your place in his life. Strike two.’’

    ‘’Okay’’ you not, knowing that he’s right, even if you don’t wanna admit it.

    ‘’And strike three… I found that pregnancy test in the bathroom. The positive one.’’

[amemiyashion]

A Revue of Revenge

Funny story about this fic, it actually wiggled back-and-forth between being posted quite a few times. At first, it was going to be a normal smut fic, but then I gave it my own twist and held onto it instead. Then I wanted to post it as a christmas fic, so I reworked it and tried to post it, but I was a coward again. And THEN the Maya OVA came out and confirmed that she wasn’t too amazing at dealing with intense emotions, so it almost became too good to post. I decided against it again, but I remembered I have this blog, so I’ll post it here first for safe-keeping. Maybe I’ll put it on AO3 one day.

A Revue of Revenge

Words: 3247 (about)

Relationships: Mayakuro

By now, the year had taken a hungering bite into the winter months, leaving nothing behind but the fleeting, tiring days of the winter holidays, and the glittering bauble-esque reward of Christmas, at the end of it all. Saijou Claudine couldn't say she enjoyed those days; the ever-present chill made it difficult to practice, as the act of changing into your leotard became a momentary dip into icy water, and staying in it even worse. Naturally, the only ones who had the guts to bear the cold was her, Junna Hoshimi and of course, Tendou Maya. Junna, however, had made herself sick from spending too much time in the frigid practice hall, and was now spending more than enough time wrapped up in Nana's arms to speed up her recovery.

The latter, though - Tendou Maya, the maze of a Stage Girl who'd been Claudine's girlfriend for more than half a year, now - Usually joined her in practice, but today had been absent. Claudine had paid no mind to it, practicing alone despite the soft panging loneliness in her stomach. It was always healthy to take a break, after all. And so, she was especially looking forward to returning to the dorms at lunchtime to share an hour or so with her before returning.

Claudine hummed along in her head, thinking about what she'd like for lunch. Hopefully something warm - something she could wrap her hands around and relax as the feeling returned to her numbed fingers. Maybe Nana could make a nice soup. But then again, she'd probably end up making banana soup, and Claudine could only fear what that tasted like. Considering they were leaving the honour of making Christmas Dinner to Nana, the nine of them would probably be having banana turkey and banana Christmas pudding by the end of the week, and that was enough banana for a year, in Claudine’s books.

By the time she reached the dorms, she'd spent long enough in her thick woollen coat and gloves to have warmed enough to make lunch herself, and was no longer at the mercy of whatever Nana cooked up. Regardless of what she’d have, Claudine wanted to share it with Maya.

Sharing was one of the tenets they'd built their relationship on: sharing food, sharing secrets, sharing their time together, and every so often, sharing their bodies. They supported each other this way, still always competing, and still occasionally bickering. Maya sometimes complained that they shared a bit too much - particularly Claudine, and food – but every time she did, Claudine just shut her up by sharing even more.

Claudine made it back to the dorms in record time, hurried on by the fuzzy, dreamy romantic nothings spinning about in her half-numbed head. Managing to unlock the door despite dropping the key once or twice, Claudine barrelled inside and took a deep breath of the warm, almost humid, air of the dorms. Her body trembled as it warmed, and Claudine thankfully unbuttoned her jacket and hung it on the hook besides the door, ready for when she left for the school once again. After all, her duty to practice always calls – practice, and lunch.

 Claudine dizzied halfway through the living room, on the hunt for Tendou Maya, more in her own mind than the real world. She was pulled out of her musings by a worried cry however, and looked about for the source. Claudine had been convinced she’d been alone in the room – she’d only wear the innocent, lovey-dovey expression she had on if she were – so when she found three people on the couch across from her, she was frankly shocked considering the noise they were making.

"Karen...!" Junna and Hikari were leaning over what seemed to be an incapacitated Aijou Karen. Hikari was slowly fanning Karen, a concerned look on her face, whilst Junna inspected the -- the black mark on Karen’s face. "Oh, god..." Junna's voice wavered as she tried to apply some kind of ointment from a first-aid kit.

Claudine's brow twitched in confusion, and she approached the three hesitantly. "What-- What's going on here?" She was struck as Junna turned to her, almost accusatorily.

"Oh, Claudine." Junna's attention darted between Karen and Claudine, and she could've sworn she heard her murmur 'speak of the devil’ when her back was turned. "Karen has been, umm... struck." Junna shook her head and cleared her throat, figuring the truth was better after an uncomfortable moment. "Tendou hit her."

"What?!" Claudine couldn't believe her ears. Tendou Maya, who was usually so polite and graceful, had apparently lashed out at Karen. Claudine had been planning so spend her lunchtime with the girl, but those plans were feeling less realistic by the second. "Do you know why?" Claudine looked at Karen - still washed out on the sofa - and wondered if they'd managed to get anything out of her.

“Well, I saw it all.” Figuring she’d have to explain, Junna muttered to herself. "Karen was feeling cold - as we all are," She sniffed instinctively, still not over her cold. "So, she hugged Maya, as she does..." Junna hesitated again, stuttering and shifting about on her feet. "And she called her - and I quote - 'soft and cuddly'." With the words out in the open, Junna managed to regain her composure. "I think you can assume what happened next." It certainly wasn’t hard to imagine.

"Oh..." Claudine couldn't even laugh as the picture in her mind came into focus. "Is Karen okay?" Not wanting to have to face whatever Maya was doing right now, Claudine feigned interest in Karen. Her partner had always been a strong girl, and by the looks of it, Karen had been on the receiving end of quite the punch.

"She'll live." Junna rolled her eyes. "We've all seen her in worse." After watching Hikari try to shake Karen awake again, she turned back to Claudine. "I think the person who's really in trouble is you, Claudine." She laughed facetiously. "Maya's been stomping around the dorm for almost an hour now, and I think she might be looking for you."

"How- What makes you think I have anything do to with this?" Claudine stepped back, Junna's accusation hitting home. Claudine’s shock was obviously just lip-service, and the sudden shift in Junna's expression told her she wasn't interested in dancing around the truth.

"We all know, Claudine." Was Junna's stark answer. Watching Claudine splutter her way through another excuse wasn't in her interest, and she promptly turned to pay attention to the comatose Karen, who seemed to be coming back to life. Hikari shook her one last time, and Karen putted to life like a broken engine. "Karen?"

"Hikari...? Junna?" Karen groaned, rubbing her head to find it hurt more than it usually did. Claudine didn't have time to waste with this reunion. Apparently, Tendou Maya was hunting her down, and if Karen's state was anything to go by, she wasn't about to get off easily.

 "Futaba! Futaba, open up!" Claudine battered unforgivingly on the door to Kaoruko and Futaba's shared room, her head occasionally darting up and down the corridor to check for any sign of Maya. After a few moments, a bed-headed Futaba creaked the door open.

"Kuroko?" Futaba dithered as she tried to sort out her messy pinkish locks, forcing her eyes to stay open. "Before you say anything, it's a Sunday in the middle of winter. Don't judge me."

Ignoring Futaba's excuses for spending so long in bed, Claudine tried to barge her way into the dormitory. "You owe me a favour, Futaba. Let me in." With that, the door slid open and Claudine almost fell through. She'd expected a snide comment from Kaoruko, but the girl was still asleep, buried under layers of duvets.

Taking a sweet breath of relief as she took a seat on Futaba's bed, Claudine rolled her eyes at her own overreaction. She had really taken to hiding away in her friend's room to weather the storm of her girlfriend's anger.

"I hate to ask, Kuro, but... What are you doing in my room?" Futaba flopped down in her bed next to Claudine, curling the covers over her shoulders as she felt the chill air Claudine had brought in with her. "Something wrong?"

"No, of course not. I just--" Claudine quickly realised just how futile lying would be. "I think I made Maya mad, and I'm hiding." Swallowing her shame tasted like a mouthful of salt, as it also meant accepting the fact that she was most certainly the one in the wrong.

Futaba choked a laugh. "You made Maya mad? Usually it's the other way around." She stopped and looked and Claudine more seriously. "But an angry Maya does sound pretty terrifying, doesn't it? I'd want to hide, too."

"Exactly." Claudine nodded as Futaba was just as understanding as usual. "So, I think we should switch rooms for tonight. I'll stay in here, and--"

"Wow, now. I think that'll just get me killed in my sleep." Futaba shook her head. "Maybe we could just talk to her about it? I'm sure if it's you two it's something stupid." Claudine hadn't expected Futaba to be so level-headed about it, but she was probably just still tired from having woken up.

"Honestly! As if you and Kaoruko's problems aren't stupid, too!" Claudine bit back, sure of herself that Maya's problems were more than some trivial high-schooler tip.

Futaba was about to speak up - and surely agree, considering their last argument had been over the last cookie in the jar - a scream rang out through the halls. Both of the girls leapt, and even Kaoruko woke up. Kaoruko hadn't been the one to scream, however, and once the other two realised, Futaba hopped to her feet.

"You're not coming?" Futaba looked down at Claudine, who was still glued tightly to Futaba's bed. "Come on, Kuroko. It's not like you to mope. What if someone's hurt?"

Claudine looked as if she was about to shake her head, but groaned and jumped up, finding she was incapable of being so petty. Telling herself she wasn't afraid of Tendou Maya, no matter how riled up she was, Claudine followed Futaba out of the room.

 Claudine mused on just how similar the scene they found was to the one she'd seen only a few minutes earlier. The ominous feeling in her chest grew as she gradually began to feel like a hunted animal.

"Nana, are you okay?" Junna was kneeling over Nana, cradling her in her arms as if she was actually dying. "Claudine!" This time, however, there was no pity from Junna; as soon as she spied Claudine, she shot a painfully spiteful look in her direction. "If you can't control your girlfriend, I'll have to call faculty."

Claudine shuffled up to Nana, still feeling the daggers coming from Junna. Even more than when she’d attacked the puppy-like Karen, Claudine felt like Maya had committed some reprehensible crime by taking down Nana. Sure, the girl might not be quite as innocent as most would care to know, but her motherly instincts made up for it twice over.

"I--" Nana spoke up. "I just asked her if she wanted something for lunch." Junna's expression became even worse as the motive behind the horrific act became clear. Nana pulled herself closer to Claudine. "This is your fault."

"Nana, we both know whose fault this really is." Claudine bit back. Nana’s maternal habits had gone into overdrive over the winter months. And whilst Claudine might have appreciated having someone wait her on hand-and-foot, Maya surely didn’t.

Nana fainted, if only to escape the conversation.

"Claudine, really. You've got to sort this out." Junna pressed, still clinging to Nana, fully aware she was faking her unconsciousness. "It's only getting worse."

Futaba murmured an agreement from behind Claudine, but before she could think of a retort, yet another pitched yell broke the air. This time, it was Kaoruko's - only she was capable of such a squawking, outraged howl.

 The two - and Junna as well, once she'd carefully placed Nana on the sofa to rest - found Kaoruko splayed out on the floor of her room, with a satisfied, if bedraggled, look on her face. Only as satisfied as someone could look, trying to crawl back into bed after being throttled to the floor, though; that much was evident by her ruffled pyjamas and flustered red face.

"Kaoruko, what did you do...?" Futaba knelt down next to Kaoruko, not bothering to help her up.

Kaoruko cackled, as she was prone to do, and finished scraping herself back into bed, snuggling into it like a rodent into a hole. "She came looking for Claudine," she managed to grin despite her condition as she pulled the covers over her shoulders. "And I called her fat when she walked out." Kaoruko returned to her usual snickering self in record time - Claudine was frankly shocked she'd been the only one to completely survive Maya's wrath. "Apparently I'm not worth killing." The exasperation in the room was audible - perhaps it'd have been better if Maya really had finished Kaoruko off.

Junna and Futaba looked at each other suddenly, wordlessly conspiring. "Well, Claudine, I think we all know what needs to happen next." There was a direly ominous tone to Futaba’s voice, and she approached Claudine from behind as she rolled her shoulders.

Before Claudine could even take a guess at what Futaba had meant, both of her arms were sealed. She gawked, suddenly arriving at the conclusion that Futaba and Junna had a moment ago. She struggled, but found no purchase. Claudine had expected Futaba to be strong enough to hold her down, but Junna's sudden burst of strength seemed out of nowhere - no doubt Nana was spiritually lending her her strength. "Wh-What are you two doing?! Unhand me!"

"No can do, Kuroko." Futaba sighed. "I hate to do this, but it'll be one of us next." Junna nodded in agreement, and Claudine could feel her heart sink. "Hey, Maya!" Futaba called out, and the air went dead silent. "Come and get her!"

Claudine laughed dryly. "You're both acting like you're going to sacrifice me to her." She looked over her shoulder at Futaba, but found no mercy, as a violent stomping filled the air. And when she turned back, Maya was already there.

"Thank you, Isurugi, Hoshimi. I'll be taking her, now." Was the last thing Claudine heard before she was grabbed by the collar and dragged back to her room.

 Claudine hadn't expected to still be alive, but as Maya practically threw her onto her own bed, she didn't think she'd have to worry about that for much longer. Nothing came, though, and Claudine opened her eyes to find the girl simply looking down at her, rather irritatedly. "You're not going to kill me?" She asked facetiously, but not entirely believing Maya wouldn't.

"Why would I..." Recalling that she'd just left a bloody trail through the dormitory, Maya sighed and collapsed onto the bed. "I'll need to apologise for that."

"I think Kaoruko had it coming." Thinking she could distract Maya with intimacy, Claudine set her hands on Maya's shoulders and edged closer, beginning to play with the collar of her shirt, but she was shocked when her partner rejected her touch. Maya almost shrunk in on herself, her cheeks growing the mildest red.

"She wasn't wrong, though, was she?" Maya's voice was at once accusatory and embarrassed as the source of her anger finally showed itself. Both of the girls' faces went a flushed shade of red as the words tried to come out. "You... You've..." Maya squeaked, unable to even think it, despite it being painfully obvious to the both of them. Claudine had to admit, it was difficult watching Maya unable to say what was on her mind.

  "I've made you fat." Claudine was just as afraid of saying it as Maya, but at this point her dignity, and responsibility as her girlfriend, won out. Claudine's stomach lurched at her own bluntness, and she hurried to correct herself. "I mean, not fat-- just, softer." Fearing Maya's wrath, she echoed Karen's words from earlier.

True enough, Maya had become slightly plumper over the months she'd spent as Claudine's beloved - at first, the natural exercise she did at the school made it a neutral game, but once the walls in her and Claudine's relationship had broken down, spurring the blonde onto bigger things, she'd began to gradually put on weight. Claudine had noticed, of course; the amount of time they'd spent naked in each other's presence had given her a front-row seat to Maya's growth. She'd been pussyfooting around the topic for the past few months, as she secretly enjoyed the show. She would never tell Maya that, though - it'd just be an extra burden in their relationship. Realistically, it was only a few pounds, but even that made all the difference to a Stage Girl. And considering it was the Christmas season, that number was probably only going to get worse if Nana had anything to say about it.

"Precisely." Maya had regained her composure quickly, and was now glaring at Claudine with the same intensity she'd had earlier. "I think it would be best for the both of us - myself especially - if you let me go on a diet."

Claudine's head spun a little bit at the implication that she had full control over Maya's eating habits, and that if she said no now, it would mean no. She took a breath and composed herself, reminding herself what happened the last time she let her indulgences take centre stage. "Of course. But--" Claudine cut herself off, realising how selfish even a single 'but' would be, baiting Maya into a trap with the promise of freedom.

"But--?" Maya reacted, and Claudine already regretted it. The air in the room had relaxed after the matter of the hour was settled, but Claudine wasn't feeling it. "I'm sure watching me go on a diet will be absolute torture for you." The malice in Maya's eyes had already been replaced by a kindness - and, perhaps, there was just a sliver of eroticism behind them. As ever, the girl was so quick to forgive. "Perhaps I'll let you have one favour."

Claudine looked for an escape as she found herself trapped between her embarrassment and her more earthly desires. Of course, Maya had already recognised the blush splashing across Claudine's cheeks; she was only like this when she knew she was putting her girlfriend on the spot. "I--" Claudine choked up, unable to even voice her desires, having locked them away safely for both of their sakes.

"Don't be embarrassed, Claudine." Maya's eyes shifted between a kind glow and a teasing edge. "I don't think anything you say could shock me, anymore - you've had your way with me plenty of times before." Claudine could see Maya on the verge of laughter as she squeezed Claudine between her fingers.

"Gah!" Claudine decided she'd had enough of Maya teasing her. "If you're going to insist, then..." Swallowing her embarrassment, Claudine approached Maya again - apparently, she must have had quite the menacing look on her face, seeing as Maya practically backed off as she closed in. "Take off your jumper, and turn around." Claudine demanded, watching as apprehension flashed across Maya's face.

"You have a rather unpleasant look in your eyes, Claudine." Maya tutted and she gingerly turned, stripping off her jumper and shivering slightly against the cold as it bit through her thin undershirt. And as she peeled that away too below, the roll of soft flesh around Maya's middle was revealed - it sat lazily on the hem of her pants, hungrily devouring skin that was once muscular and taut and turning it into smooth, plushy curves. At first, Maya instinctively covered it, wrapping her arms around her hips, but taking care not to touch her soft skin as if she were afraid of her own stomach and the power it could hold over her. "I do hope you aren't planning anything untowards." Even like this, though, Maya was completely irresistible.

"Shut up." Claudine cleared her throat, looming over Maya as she tensed up. As always, Maya was a sensitive mess when it came to intimacy. Watching her squirm was something Claudine would never get tired of, even if it came at the price of having Maya watch her squirm with the same glee. As she pictured how red her partner’s face must be, Claudine began wrapping her arms around her middle, easing Maya's arms out of the way before resting her chin on her shoulder.

"...!" Flinching as Claudine's cold skin brushed against her own body, Maya wished that Claudine would get whatever she was planning over with.

And Claudine happily indulged her request; with a slow breath to calm her heart, she set her hands on Maya's exposed stomach, squeezing deep into the layer of flesh. Feeling Maya twitch as Claudine exploited her insecurity, her fingers dug even deeper, feeling out the very extremity of Maya's fluffiness. Just having her girlfriend's skin bulge between her probing fingers was heavenly enough, but Claudine wasn't done yet. "This is Tendou Maya." She whispered, twisting the Top Star of Seisho's signature line into a teasing torture.

 !!!

Claudine awoke a few hours later, groaning as she rubbed the sleep from her eyes. She took a wild guess at what had happened as she looked about, peering through the half-light of the late afternoon. She'd have laughed at Maya's touchiness if it hadn't been her on the receiving end, this time. Her eyes adjusted, and she spied a figure on her bed; Tendou Maya, her limbs splayed across the mattress, and a smattering of cookie crumbs across her cheek.

"God, she stuffs herself with cookies and falls asleep in the middle of the day. To think Tendou Maya could be such a slob..." After what the two of them privately referred to as 'The Incident', Claudine had sworn herself away from blackmail. She decided, however, as the shutter of her camera went off once, twice, and again, that having a bit of ammunition never hurt.

[bloomingednae]

Can you do number 16 with okakuri please?

Here we are! I apologize again for how late it is. Hope you enjoy!

OTP Prompt Request: OkaKuri - “Is that my shirt?”

Kurisu began to nervously twirl a stray strand of her hair in the front, her eyes shifting from left to right as she spoke.

“Then why are you still staring…”

It was one of those days where the lab was unusually low on stock items; it also turned out to be one of those days that Mayuri had seemingly noticed and strongly insisted that they both go out to buy more food, drinks, and other items they may find necessary (with bananas being a priority on the list). Why the young girl was so insistent that they leave the lab together was beyond them, but they followed her orders in any case. They both, however, didn’t miss the huge smile on the young girl’s face as she waved them goodbye from the laboratory window.

It was supposed to be a simple trip, really. A quick stop to the convenience store and back to the lab was a usual errand for the both of them, just with more items to pick up. At the store, Kurisu insisted that Okabe buy her two more pudding cups and he couldn’t help but grit his teeth in defeat (he did eat both of them again without asking her).

The normal routine ensued as he paid for the items (he tried to ignore the smug look of victory on his assistant’s face) and he grabbed the bag of items to carry back to the lab.

What they didn’t expect, however, was to run back to the lab after their errands. The rain had come from seemingly nowhere as they both made a mad dash up the stairs and into the small living room of the lab, completely soaked.

Okabe awkwardly walked to the small kitchen top to drop off the bought items, taking extra caution to not slip on the floor (he grimaced when he realized his socks were wet too). As he placed the items on the counter, he noticed a small note in bubbly writing:

“Tuturu! Yuki-san called right after you guys left and she wanted to cook dinner for all of us, so me and Daru-kun went shopping with her! We’ll see you later. ~”

Okabe quirked his eyebrow, sighing. Then what was the point of us going to the store…, he thought to himself. He wondered for a split moment if this was her plan all along, but decided to disregard it.

Turning around, he noticed Kurisu still standing near the entrance of the living room, shoes already off, trying to gently comb out her soaked hair. He didn’t miss the evident shiver she demonstrated and her eyes locked with his for a split second before she looked away and attempted to cover her white blouse with her cardigan.

“D-Don’t look this way, idiot!”

Okabe looked at her, confused for a split second, before flushing red and averting his eyes from her. He looked at the lab shower room and nodded in that direction.

“Go shower. It won’t do any of us good if the whole living room is soaked before they all come back.”

Kurisu eyed the note on the counter and nodded. “What about you-”

“Hm?” Okabe interjected, his eyes still averted from her. “Is my assistant voicing concern for her mad scientist?”

He heard her footsteps cross the room towards the direction of the shower room and saw her visibly flip her hair over her shoulder, causing the water from her hair to spray him unexpectedly. He flinched back from the water and rubbed his eyes to see Kurisu entering the shower room, a defiant look on her face.

“Who’s mad scientist are you, now? I don’t recall ever voicing that.”

Okabe scoffed. “There’s only one person who’d ever stick around for Hououin Kyouma-”

She squinted her eyes at him. “I’m pretty sure I agreed to stick around for Okabe Rintarou-” Kurisu cut off her sentence before she realized what she was admitting, her face flushing red once more as she turned her head away from him.

“W-Why am I admitting this to you again, anyway?! I’m taking a shower.”

Okabe watched as the door closed and he shook his head. Tsundere as she was, Kurisu was someone he somehow understood and he laughed a bit at her antics.

As he crossed the room to the development room for his spare lab coat and other clothes, it hit him that he wasn’t even sure if Kurisu had extra clothes in the lab to begin with. The thought crossed his mind for a second and then he shrugged, concluding in his mind that Mayuri probably had extra clothes lying around somewhere. It wasn’t unusual for her to leave extra items randomly throughout his apartment.

So when Kurisu came out of the shower nearly fifteen minutes later dressed in a slightly oversized gray shirt and short black shorts, he found himself almost choking on his Dr. Pepper before straightening up. Clearing his throat, he eyed Kurisu, who met his gaze and flushed red.

“…Assistant, is that my shirt-”

“I-It’s not like I wanted to wear your shirt, okay! I just couldn’t find Mayuri’s extra shirts…”

She trailed off as she glanced down at her outfit, realizing the shirt went slightly past the length of the black shorts and she crossed her arms.

“I-I’m wearing my black pajama shorts underneath this, so-!”

“M-My mad scientist mind figured that out already…!” Okabe uncharacteristically stammered, as he glanced at her.

Kurisu began to nervously twirl a stray strand of her hair in the front, her eyes shifting from left to right as she spoke.

“Then why are you still staring…”

Okabe inhaled. It’s not like one of the most respected and smartest scientist was standing in his living room. It’s not like she’s his girlfriend or anything. It’s not like he thought she was actually unbearingly cute right now wearing his shirt and how much he wanted to cross the room right now and hold her in his arms-

“…what did…you just say?”

Kurisu’s voice broke his line of thought and as he looked up to gaze at her flushed expression, he realized his last thought had actually and unknowingly became voiced. He quickly turned  away and gathered his clothes and towel, walking fast towards the shower room and ignoring Kurisu’s embarrassed gaze. As he closed the door of the shower room behind him, he vaguely heard the sound of her laughing as she settled on the couch and he rubbed his temples, realizing he let his emotions seep out of his thoughts and voiced into words for once. The very thought caused him to feel flush once more.

As he placed his clothes on the rack, he noticed some of the cabinets open, revealing the extra clothes and towels which Mayuri had so often stocked. In the corner of his eye, he noticed a shade of bright blue, one of Mayuri’s shirts still, in fact, folded and kept in the cabinet. It had been moved aside, he noticed; where his extra set of clothes usually were, his shirt was gone (obviously), but the sweat pants remained.

He sighed and then laughed softly. How he managed his tsundere partner was beyond him, but it was nice to know that their thoughts were mutually aligned.

[cherry-kirsch]

2. a patch of thistles : wishing on dandelions

ushihina || multi-chaptered || sfw || hanahaki au

It’s Suga who comes to collect him for breakfast the next morning, all bright eyed and bushy tailed.

As Ushijima follows Suga out of his room, allowing the door to click shut behind him, he suspects that he himself must look a little like he’s been dragged through a hedge backwards, seeing as he didn’t get to check his reflection in the mirror this morning. While passing the glass windows that line the opposite end of the corridor, he grimaces and immediately tries to flatten the way his hair sticks up at odd angles and curls a little, while also trying to pull up his ripped jeans.

Suga, thankfully, pretends not to notice Ushijima’s panic to look somewhat presentable, and gestures him into the dining area—where everyone’s eyes snap to him as he enters.

“Ushiwaka! ~” Tooru coos, standing up so quickly the chair scrapes backwards and makes an awful noise that causes everyone else to smack their hands over their ears. “Come over here and sit with me and Suga!” He says happily, trying to shove the tall blond out of the seat beside him, only to receive a glare. Tooru glares right back and click his tongue at him. “Now, really, Tsukki!”

Ushijima holds up a hand when Tooru turns to tell him (or order him) to do something else. “It’s alright.” He says, a faint twinge of apology in his voice. “I’ll sit with Hinata.” He continues gesturing to the table that Shouyou and his friend are sitting at before he turns to Suga. “Where can I get food?” He asks and Suga grins.

“This way,” Suga says, leading the way to a buffet-style table and grabbing both a bowl and plate for Ushijima and handing them to him when he joins his side. “It may not look like much, but the food is pretty good.”

The row of white-cotton covered tables in front of them shows everything from cereal to toast to fresh fruit, as well as a selection of fruit juices and coffees and teas. Suga immediately reaches for an instant porridge, a banana and an apple, and then picks out a fruit tea before he winks at Ushijima and returns to a sulking Tooru, leaving Ushijima to himself.

Ushijima, unsure of where to begin, makes two slices of toast, slathers them with jam and butter and makes himself a coffee before he makes his way over to Hinata’s table and sits down.

Shouyou looks up from picking idly at his bowl of cereal and gives Ushijima a tired smile. “G’morning, Ushi.” He manages before he slumps face-first onto the table. “I’m so tired!” he moans, tugging at the sleeve of Ushijima’s plaid as he tries to shove his toast in his mouth.

“What time did you go to bed?” Ushijima asks him, his voice mumbled through the food in his mouth.

Shouyou and his friend make eye contact and have an entire conversation in a second, with only looking into each other’s eyes, before he turns back to Ushijima and tries not to look sheepish. “3 am.” He mumbles, pressing his face back into the plastic of the table.

Ushijima frowns. “You should go to bed earlier. Then you’ll be more awake.” He tells Shouyou, who groans and pulls himself up onto his elbows.

“But where’s the fun in that?” He asks with a small pout, before his eyes drop down to the mug clasped in Ushijima’s hands. “Ohh! Give me half of your coffee!” He says excitedly, already making grabby hands at it before Ushijima places his palm on the middle of Shouyou’s forehead and pushes him back into his seat.

“No.” Ushijima says simply, not yet moving his hand from where they rest on Shouyou’s forehead. “It’s mine.”

Shouyou makes a small noise of indignation and tries to surge forward again, only for Ushijima to push him back into his seat. “Why not? It’s a big mug! You can’t drink it all on your own.”

Ushijima makes direct eye contact with Shouyou. “Yes I can.”

Shouyou gives him puppy-dog eyes and claps his wrist. “A quarter of your coffee?”

“No.”

“A sip of your coffee?” Shouyou asks desperately and Ushijima considers this.

Finding himself weakening at Shouyou’s puppy-dog eyes, he gives a small shrug and holds out the mug for Shouyou to take, releasing his forehead and leaning back in his seat. Shouyou’s friend looks up at him and frowns a little in a way that makes Ushijima feel like he’s done something very wrong.

“Don’t give him coffee.” He says, so seriously that Ushijima swears he’s being given a prophecy that holds great fate. “If you give him coffee, nothing can stop him.” Ushijima blinks at the boy and his pudding-coloured head of hair. Well, fuck, if that wasn’t the most ominous and vaguely worrying thing Ushijima had been told about a person in the last 24 hours.

But, before Ushijima can take anything back, Shouyou’s hands close around the mug of coffee and brings the blue china to his lips, taking one long, drawn out gulp that seems to be more like half the mug than a single sip before he slams it back on Ushijima’s side of the table with an almost manic grin.

“Thanks!” Shouyou chirps, way to enthusiastically.

The boy beside him sighs and turns back to his DS. “You’ve done it now.” He says quietly.

Ushijima blinks between them. “Done what?!” he asks incredulously.

Shouyou stares at him very unnervingly and Ushijima stares right back. Shouyou leans across the table, his forearms crossed and his nose almost touching Ushijima’s, and Ushijima makes a weird facial expression and leans back in his seat; trying to put as much distance as he can between Shouyou’s drilling stare.

“You’ve got toothpaste on the side of your mouth,” Shouyou says seriously before he breaks out in a grin, licks his thumb and swipes it over the toothpaste to get rid of it. “There we go! All better!” He giggles, plopping himself back down into his seat with a little bounce.

As if called by the sense of intimacy, Oikawa slides into the seat next to Ushijima, giving him a small, fake pout as he grasps his arm. “Ushiwaka! Why didn’t you want to come sit with me?”

Ushijima gives him a very dry look. “Why would I want to come sit with you?”

Tooru punches him jokingly (and a little bit too harshly) in the shoulder. “Because we’re friends, stupid!” Tooru laughs. “And all of us fucked up, unrequited love-sters need to stick together. Side by side.” To make his point, Tooru presses so close to Ushijima that he’s practically on his lap.

Ushijima pushes him gently away. “I’d rather not.” He says and Tooru pouts, turns away and rests his chin on top of his hands.

“Most people rather would when I’m involved.” Tooru says with a pointed, mischievous grin, leaning up to poke Ushijima’s cheek. “Because I’m so devilishly handsome.”

Shouyou sticks his tongue out at Tooru. “Devilishly annoying more like.” He pipes up.

“Says you.” Tooru bites back. “You’re so small… and… tiny.”

“Stop using different words that have the same meaning!” Shouyou says, and an approaching blond has to prevent him from launching himself across the table at Tooru, who is taunting him and sticking his tongue out. “Let go of me you weird beanpole!”

The blond drops him back into his seat and slides into the seat to the right of him. “Says the toddler.” He replies, immediately picking up an apple from Shouyou’s tray and taking a big bite of it.

Shouyou snatches it from his hand and licks it. “Eating apples makes you look like an even bigger asshole than you were before, Kei.” He says, sticking his tongue out at him as Kei looks on, disgusted. He offers the apple again. “Do you want this back?” He asks.

Kei glares. “Not now that you’ve slavered all over it.” He says and Shouyou grins triumphantly.

“Thought so,” he says, and he shoves the apple into his own mouth. “Sweet revenge.”

Kei looks disgusted and turns to Ushijima, thrusting out his hand just as Ushijima shoves his other slice of toast into his mouth.

“My name is Tsukishima Kei,” Kei says. “One of the only dignified people here.”

Tooru pouts. “Why have you go to be so mean, Tsukki! Nobody else is going around sprinkling salt into pleasant conversation.” He says with a little huff. “The rest of us are being polite and civilised members of society!”

Kei makes a face at him. “Say’s the guy who’s practically salivating over Mr. Japan here.” He says, jabbing a thumb in Ushijima’s direction, and Ushijima immediately chokes on his toast.

“What?” Ushijima asks hoarsely before he gulps down the rest of his coffee in order to clear his throat. “My name is Ushijima Wakatoshi. Where’d you get Japan from?”

Kei waves a hand dismissively. “Unimportant.”

“Au contraire, Tsukki!” Tooru butts in with a mischievous glint in his eye. “It’s very important.”

“Just go back to drooling over Japan’s rippling biceps and toned abs.” Kei tells him with a curt nod.

Immediately, Tooru breaks out into a grin and presses himself against Ushijima’s side, replying with a chipper, “Okay!”.

Ushijima shakes him off, much to Tooru’s dismay, and he looks between Kei and Tooru. “I never agreed to that.” He says and Kei just rolls his eyes at him. “I don’t want anybody drooling over my body, I’m a person not a pair of walking abs.” While Tooru mutters a barely audible, ‘Hmm… Debatable.’, Kei leans across the table with a smirk and asks, very uncharacteristically sweetly; ‘Why? Do you have a girlfriend or something?’

“Or a boyfriend,” Tooru adds, resting his elbows on the table in front of him to resume the gossip pose. “We’re all gay here.”

The pudding-haired man barely looks up from his DS. “If you have a girlfriend you’d be the token straight.” He says and Shouyou grins.

“Token straight! Token straight! Token strai—” Shouyou begins to chant before he’s cut off by a raven haired girl sliding into the seat next to Tooru, who shoves a croissant in his mouth to get him to shut up. He doesn’t protest, but chews thoughtfully.

“No,” She says with a small shake of her head. “That’s Tanaka.”

Ushijima suddenly feels very out of his depth. “Tanaka?” he asks and the girl looks over to him.

“Tanaka Ryuunosuke,” The girl answers, carefully tucking her hair behind her ear. “He’s Saeko’s little brother. He comes here to flirt with a girl who is on nursing staff on a regular basis.”

Shouyou frowns. “But Tanaka’s bisexual, he told me himself.” He says and the woman gives a small shrug and turns back to Ushijima.

“I guess so, then—Ushijima, you’re reinstated as token straight.” She tells him before she daintily holds out a hand for him to shake. “I’m Shimizu Kiyoko. It’s a pleasure.” She says as he takes her hand and shakes it loosely.

“I’ve always wanted to be friends with a straight man,” Shouyou says a little too enthusiastically for Ushijima’s liking. “I’ve always wondered what straight sex is like. So, tell me, is it really as cringey as it is in porn?” He asks, peering at Ushijima with wide, curious eyes.

Ushijima stares back at him. “What are you doing?” He asks, feeling very perplexed.

“Subverting the gay-best-friend trope,” Shouyou says with a small smile. “You’re now my straight best friend.”

“But I’m not straight.” Ushijima says slowly and Shouyou blinks at him for a moment.

He frowns then, resting his chin on his hands as he looks to Kei. “By all accounts,” Shouyou begins as Kei nods along. “It doesn’t make sense.”

Tooru grins triumphantly, and with so much glee that for anybody who didn’t know the context of the situation it would look like he’s just won the lottery. “Oh,” he says, pressing himself more firmly against Ushijima’s side. “I think it does.”

Kei raises an eyebrow and looks to Tooru. “I guess we are all gay here.” He says and then his eyes snap to Shouyou. “And don’t chant that, for God’s sake.” He continues and Shouyou slumps onto the table, dejected.

“One of us.” The pudding-head says and Shouyou’s head snaps up.

Kei grits his teeth. “Don’t, Kenma.”

Kenma ignores him. “One of us.” He repeats and a grin stretches Shouyou’s lips.

“Don’t.” Kiyoko says in warning to Shouyou, who just ignores her.

“One of us! One of us! One of u—” Shouyou chants, only to be cut off my Tooru leaning across the table to shove an entire orange into his mouth. Shouyou, once more, doesn’t protest, but removes it from his mouth so he can peel it and eat it segment by segment; leaving him pleasantly quiet and content.

Tooru grins and breathes in deeply. “There,” he says. “Much better.”

“Incorrect.” Kenma says. “You’re still talking.”

By the look on Tooru’s face you would’ve guessed that Kenma just stood on his tail. “Kenma!” Tooru gasps, aghast at Kenma’s reply. “That’s so… so… rude! I’m a national treasure!”

This time, it’s Kei’s turn to give Tooru a look and add, “Debatable.”, in reply. Tooru looks like he’s going to melt into a puddle on the floor like the Wicked Witch of the West.

Kiyoko rolls her eyes and leans across the table for Shouyou’s carton of milk and pauses halfway to reaching for it, she looks down at Ushijima and then back up to meet his eyes, and then, very seriously, she says; “Your fly is undone, Ushijima.” And the table falls deathly silent.

Immediately, Tooru’s eyes dart down to his crotch and back up, a small, wicked smile curving his lips. “Nice boxers.” He comments and that’s all the prompting Ushijima need to turn away from the table and quickly zip his fly up, his hands shaking and his neck and ears flushed red.

“Don’t be embarrassed,” Kei says, gesturing to his burning ears. “It happens to the best of us.” He adds nonchalantly.

Shouyou nods furiously in agreement. “Yeah,” he says. “Once my dick popped out of my boxers and I had my fly undone. I didn’t realise until I went to the bathroom.”

Tooru nods in agreement. “Yeah! The same thing happened to me.”

Kiyoko sips on her milk carton and shrugs. “Can’t relate.” She adds.

Shouyou finds Ushijima sitting down opposite the flower mural, and has no idea how he managed to find him after he disappeared without a word after lunch. But he just gives Ushijima a soft smile and sits next to him, his knees tugged to his chest and his arms wrapped around them, his head on his knees.

“Suga saw you,” Shouyou says. “He thought you might need company.”

Ushijima turns to Shouyou and considers this. “Why didn’t he come?” He asks.

“As much as Suga seems like the Team Mum, he’s very hard on tough love.” Shouyou explains with a chuckle. “Me? Not so much. He said you looked funny so I came to keep you company.”

Nodding, Ushijima turns back to the mural. “I see.”

“What’s wrong?” Shouyou asks, and Ushijima can’t remember ever being asked that with so much sincerity and concern. “Was it because of breakfast? Kiyoko tends to be a little blunt, but she means well, and she told me to tell you that she’s sorry because we couldn’t find you. There’s no need to be embarrassed about it.”

“I’m not embarrassed.” Ushijima says far too harshly to be convincing, but Shouyou nods anyway and scuffs the toe of his shoe on the linoleum. “It’s…” He gestures to the mural in front of him. “How can you stand it?”

Shouyou looks between the mural and Ushijima, frowning. “What?” he asks.

“The flowers.” Ushijima bites back, glaring furiously at the colourful petals and green stems, and how they swim before him in a river of red. “You’ve got them everywhere, and you’ve got to stare at them and look at them. Takeda says that some of you love them again, and I don’t…” Ushijima sucks in a deep breath, trying to swallow down his anger. “I don’t… get it.”

Shouyou blinks at him and then curls over himself. “Suga loves flowers.” He says quietly.

“Which were his?” Ushijima asks quickly and Shouyou gives him a worried look.

“Ushijima—” He begins with a small sigh and Ushijima’s eyes snap to his.

“Which were his?’ He repeats more firmly, standing up.

Crumbling, giving in, Shouyou points to the mural. Ushijima follows the line of his finger, walking forward as his eyes meet a cluster of pink peonies and daisies. He imagines coughing them up, petal after petal, until he’s almost gagging on the paper-thin, smooth pink petals. He images the scratch of the stems making its way up his throat, the way his lips can’t quite open far enough to let the head of the flower pass, and he imagines coughing, choking on it, drowning from the inside out on beautiful flowers. He imagines that the daisies come out easier.

He lifts a hand to clutch his throat and turns back to Shouyou, hoarse. “Which ones were Kiyoko’s?”

Shouyou stands with him then, his eyes creased in worry. “Ushijima, I don’t think—” He begins, only to be cut off by Ushijima’s glance; a pitiful combination of desperation and danger. His hands shaking, he points to the right of the peonies. “Those ones.”

His eyes meet the bright hues of yellow tulips, sweetpeas and crocus. He imagines the three flowers choking him, drowning his lungs in stems, leaves and colourful petals. They stain his lips like bright blood as he coughs them up, blood splatters his hands and the sink below him, and he heaves, trying to force the flowers up his windpipe.

As if possessed, he lifts his other hand to his throat. “Tooru’s?” he asks and Shouyou points to a crying cherry blossom tree surrounded by poppies.

The branches scratch his throat raw as he coughs up tiny, love-heart pink petals and wider, round red petals; the branches hurt so much he gasps, wheezes and heaves, suffocating, they pierce his throat almost like thorns. The poppies are easier, they slip out covered in blood and saliva, and he hardly gets a breath before the next waterfall of cherry blossom blooms are making their way up his throat,

“Kenma’s?”

Shouyou points wordlessly to a small collection of lilac’s and pansies. So… small that Ushijima can imagine suffocating on them easily.

“Kei’s.” He manages, less of a question and more of a demand now, and Shouyou points to baby’s breath, pink begonias, and white heather.

Ushijima nods at that, overwhelmed at the imagines sensation of the flowers and stems making their way up his throat and spilling from between his fingers like water, and staggers back against the wall, hardly realising the tears that leak down his cheeks until Shouyou is wiping them away with the sleeve of his jumper.

“I don’t…” Ushijima tries to say, only to be cut off by the saltiness of his own tears. “I don’t… get it.” He repeats. “You can look at them and see beauty. I look at them and I want to cut them like they cut me.” He manages, lifting his hands from his throat to tangle in his hair. “How can you not look at them and feel them suffocating you?”

Shouyou gives him a very serious look. “Do you still love the person you fell in love with?” He asks.

Ushijima shakes his head. “No,” he chokes out. “But I still feel like I’m drowning. Do you know what he gave me when he came to visit me in hospital?” Ushijima asks with a bitter, tearful laugh. “Red roses. Red roses. I don’t love him, I hate him. I hate him. I hate him.” He spits the words out like venom. “I hate… I hate…”

“I know,” Shouyou says softly, clutching Ushijima’s arms. “It hurts to fall in love with best friends. It hurts… to love. The lucky ones only get heartache. The unlucky ones get to choke on flowers."

Ushijima pressed his forehead against Shouyou’s chest. “I hate. I hate.” He mumbles into the sweet, lavender scented fabric of his sweatshirt. “I hate him.”

“He’s your best friend,” Shouyou says softly, sadly. “You can say you hate him all you want, but you can never force yourself to hate him. Trust me, I know. You get stuck on fake feeling so much that you’re not really sure that anything is real, and then you don’t feel anything.”

Ushijima buries his face further into Shouyou’s sweatshirt. “You know a lot about this.” He says quietly. “Is this the first time you’ve had Hanahaki?”

“I don’t talk about my past loves a lot,” Shouyou says. “You’ll never find out.”

Ushijima sniffs. “Is that a challenge?”

“If you want it to be.” Shouyou replies easily and with a hint of a grin in his voice. “Do you really hate the mural that much? Do you really… not see the beauty in the flowers?” He asks softly.

“Flowers… aren’t beautiful to me.” Ushijima whispers. “I never really liked them. They spread pollen everywhere and drop petals onto the ground, they’re a hassle to clean up. But after coughing up roses, petal after petal, flower after flower… I look at them… and all I can see is… something ugly.”

Shouyou runs his hand through Ushijima’s hair. “We painted that mural because Tooru and Suga thought it would be cathartic.” He explains. “It helped Suga, he got over his Hanahaki without a second bout. Tooru… I don’t know if it helped that much, but he’s always found flowers pretty. Kei did it because Tooru made him. Kiyoko did it because she loved—loves—the girl whose flowers she coughed up. Kenma...” Shouyou lets out a low chuckle. “I made Kenma paint his flowers.”

Ushijima pulls away from Shouyou’s sweet scent and gazes up into his eyes. “How long have you been here?” Ushijima asks him and Shouyou grins.

“Not telling.” He says. “You’ll have to guess that too.”

“So secretive for such an open guy.” Ushijima says and Shouyou grins harder.

“I’m getting déjà vu.” He says and Ushijima chuckles.

Shouyou lowers himself back beside Ushijima, leaning comfortably into his arm. “I love flowers.” Shouyou says softly. “But only the ones I haven’t coughed up.”

Ushijima looks at him. “Which ones are you favourites?” He asks and Shouyou considers this.

“Sunflowers,” He decides after a moment, smiling at Ushijima. “Because you can roast and eat the seeds.”

Ushijima reaches out to ruffle Shouyou’s hair with a small, barely-there smile. “They suit you.” He says and Shouyou grins wider and leans into his touch a little bit.

“Yeah?” He says and then he peers at Ushijima curiously. “If you had to pick; which would be your favourite?” Upon noticing Ushijima’s shocked and perplexed look, Shouyou shakes his hands in front of him. “I mean; only if you had to pick one.”

“Hibiscus.” Ushijima says after a moment of thought. “I had it in champagne at New Year’s one time. It tasted nice.”

Shouyou blinks at him for a moment and then bursts out into peals of laughter, Ushijima watches him in amusement until he’s calmed down enough to articulate himself. After a minute of solid laughter, Shouyou pulls himself back up into a sitting position and dries his eyes, still chuckling happily to himself.

Ushijima rests his elbow on his knee and smiles at him. “What’s so funny?” He asks and Shouyou’s chest moves up and down with the force of trying to swallow his laughter.

“I just—Give me a minute!” Shouyou wheezes, pressing his face into his knees before pulling back up and smacking his cheeks twice as he turns back to Ushijima, his lips immediately wobbling as he tries to prevent a wide grin. “I just think it’s funny that we both picked flowers that can be eaten.”

“That’s what you were giggling about?” Ushijima asks. “It wasn’t that funny.”

Shouyou scoffs and starts giggling again. “It was to me, and that’s what counts.” He says, looking at Ushijima very seriously. “Sometimes you’ve just got to stand up to what’s in your way, and what’s putting you down and laugh really hard until your stomach hurts and your head’s spinning.”

“Why?” Ushijima asks.

“Because things seem less scary when you do,” Shouyou says with a small nod. “Also, there’s just something very cathartic about laughing when you’re not supposed to be. It’s like… a giant middle finger to the world.”

Ushijima considers this. “There are some times when you’re not supposed to laugh.” He points out.

Shouyou frowns in confusion. “Like when?” He asks.

“Funerals, for one.” Ushijima says and Shouyou scoffs.

“Everyone needs a good laugh at a funeral.” He says.

Ushijima thinks. “When the bride is coming down the aisle at her wedding.”

Shouyou raises an eyebrow at Ushijima. “If her hair and makeup looks stupid, then I’m gonna laugh, Ushijima.” He says as if that much was obvious.

“But you shouldn’t.” Ushijima replies.

“Yes, but I will anyway.” Shouyou says confidently. “And that’s what makes it so cathartic! Laughing is the worst in that situation, but you do it anyway because you need to be less terrified and less caught up in everything. So, next time you’re upset about something or scared, just laugh, laugh until your stomach hurts; I swear you’ll feel better.”

Ushijima raises his eyebrows. “It really works?”

Shouyou nods sagely. “I swear it on my life.” He says, a hand on his heart. “Scouts Honour.”

“That’s two different things.” Ushijima points out and Shouyou shrugs.

“Double the protection on my advice.” He says and Ushijima can’t fault him on that.

“Okay,” Ushijima says. “Next time I feel upset, scared or less… here… I’ll laugh. But if it doesn’t work, I want my money back.”

Shouyou puffs his cheeks up at Ushijima and pouts. “But you didn’t pay me!” Shouyou protests as Ushijima laughs, leaning forward to pound his fists on Ushijima’s chest. “Pay me! 100 yen an hour! Don’t be stingy!”

Ushijima pulls out his pockets in front of Shouyou. “I don’t have any money.” He says. “I can’t pay you.”

Shouyou pouts and crosses his arms across his chest. “You can pay me later, and I will be reminding you of that fact!” He says, wagging a finger at Ushijima’s face.

“Alright, alright,” Ushijima gives in. “What was it? 100 yen an hour?”

“Yes,” Shouyou nods. “And dental.”

“Dental?” Ushijima says with a shake of his head. “I can’t afford that.”

“Fine,” Shouyou caves. “Free company lunches.”

Ushijima thrusts his hand out. “Deal, because you get that anyway.” He says and Shouyou grins as he takes his hand and shakes enthusiastically. “Looking forward to working with you.”

“And you, boss.” Shouyou replies, dropping Ushijima’s hand before he goes very serious. “Just… promise me one thing, okay?” He asks.

“What?” Ushijima asks.

“Don’t… do something that you’ll regret.” Shouyou tells him.

Honestly, Ushijima doesn’t think that will be possible.

[twixfrappuccino]

The inevitable relapse. The thought of the fact that we will never be anything is becoming more imminent. Nothing can ever be forced and I know I cannot always win in this life but god I cannot face your rejection. Hell it’s been three years and you still make me painfully nervous, although being nervous around the person you like is not a bad thing I think one should be but there is an elephant in the room. We’re drawn to each other like a fucking drug you’ve said it yourself about “our attraction thing”. I cannot do this anymore, not if we’re both the same not if there will never be any type of communication. You’re banana pudding, you’re comfortable, everything with you comes so easy and I love that about you but this is not good for my health. To feel as though I am tied to you almost against my will is something I have to get rid of. Maybe if I could get everything I’ve ever wanted to say off my chest I could liberate myself. I think I am strong enough now, I won’t choke on my words like I did that night over the summer. I can’t, because closing this out is the only way I can let you go. I have to know, if you could truly reject me after everything I have to say then I can leave you behind for good. I know you would and it’s for the best I’m sure.