#almost 18 years later and we’ve been together 14 of those years and have a daughter

[sadaveniren]

Now I wanna ask about your personal meetcute! Would you be willing to share? Have a nice rest of your day!

Lol sure!

We ran in the same-ish nerd/weeb circles in highschool. But our first time truly meeting he had just lost his virginity in our highschool’s basement. He was full on freaking out as he came to wait for his parents to pick him up so he sat down across from me on the front steps and said “I just lost my virginity, distract me”

I proceeded to ramble on about all the facts of hormonal birth control I knew and how it’s not just used to prevent pregnancy but has a wide variety of uses outside of that which makes it a very useful and versatile medication that shouldn’t be demonized (I began my radicalization of him early)

And thus began our friendship 😂

[swinterr]

fic rec vi ♡

hi!

this is a another new set of fic rec and i’ll probably do a compilation of genre (?) just like the first ones.

made some changes like tidying up a bit and adding summary, for those that doesn’t have any summary i’ll try my best to add my own summary (it will probably be shit tho, i ain’t making a smut summary guys, i’m not confident in my describing a fic ability but i’ll try my best. if its in italic it means i made the summary hehez )  if the summary is shit, i made it okay.

read and support the fic and authors here: the fic rec ♡

a for angst

f for fluff

s for smut

// for series or list

nct 

jeno

no title by @tyongf-nct | s

- smut blurb.

body guards and boyfriend by @pastelsicheng | f

-  sometimes the only way you can really get some alone time with your boyfriend is by making his job hard.

lipstick smears by @kopikokun | f

-  jeno never thought trying to get his makeup artist’s attention would be this hard.

jaehyun

[10:30] by @moonttaeil | 

- a lockdown moment.

[2:40] by @nct-jungjaehyun | f a

- cute quality fluff time with bf!jae with a dash of angst.

[11:41] by @jeongvision | f 

- family time with apples.

just like magic by @starryhyuck | f s

-  jung jaehyun’s body count is almost as high as yours. however, after yuta spreads a nasty rumor, you learn that jaehyun’s always imagined those girls to be you instead.

love to hate me by @moonctzeny | s a 

-  you and jaehyun meet as sm trainees, developing a friendship until he debuts and you decided to leave the company and pursue a solo career. when you reunite again in a music show and he acts like he barely knows you, you stubbornly begin a series of hate-brimmed sex rendez-vous. your touch-and-go relationship continues on, until a song collaboration will force you both to deal with all your repressed feelings for each other.

moving on by @ddeonghwaa | f a

- reader has been chasing jae for some time but when she moved on jae suddenly enter the picture.

sun&moon by @ppangjae | f a

-  asking jeong jaehyun to accompany you to your family’s 1-week christmas vacation as your boyfriend has its consequences. one can surely get through 1 week of pretending to be in love with an enemy, right?

snack run with a snack by @kopikokun | f 

-  on your usual movie night with the members, they assign you sudden snack collecting duty. you’re a little peeved, but at least jaehyun offers to tag along. Unfortunately for you, things really aren’t going in your favour tonight.

lover boy by @neoct-zen | f s

- bunch fics of lover boy jae and reader.

jungwoo

one more time, please by @haequarius | f s

-  you don’t know what you and Jungwoo are, but you are certainly weak for him.

jealous by @whiplashsan | s 

-  jungwoo is all smiles and sunshine until he gets jealous, and he just so happens to get jealous over the smallest things when it comes to you.

doyoung

sugar, spice and everything not nice by @alreadyblondenow | s

-  doyoung getting your ring size wrong, unprotected sex, kitchen sex, slight fingering, wedding tragedies.

no title by @ncteaxhoe | s

- dom!doyoung, rough? i need holy water.

the little one by @ethaeriyeol | f 

-  a gift of life; female reader x husband!Doyoung; fluff, light angst, married au

lucas

exquisite taste by @weishenkonbini | s f

- smut but with a fluffy ending.

for you always by @labyrinthsofyou | f

-  in which you surprise yukhei when he forgets about your date.

6:19 by @cozykpopblurbs | f

- a cute fluff ft kun and winwin.

10:18 pm by @nctsoftarchives | f

- reader supports lucas at his superm debut stage. 

16:47 by @sichengssmile | f s 

- a fluffy smut. lucas a big boi.

missed you by @tokyobts | a f

-  after you and yukhei broke up, yukhei still has feelings for you. he reaches out to you at school and tries to get you back. at first you avoid him but later his actions manage to make your heart flutter. you’ve come to a sudden conclusion that you maybe still want him in your life.

johnny

34 + 35 by @domjaehyun | s 

- you and your husband johnny decide to take your marriage to the next step.

i couldn’t wait a little longer by @alreadyblondenow | s f a

-  you two were never together longer than two days, but the feelings, oh the feelings that you have for each other is clear as the day. it was a never-ending try of making the relationship official. johnny tried, you tried but it never happens.

what happens in korea, not stays in korea by @alreadyblondenow | f s 

-  a week vacation in korea for your sister’s wedding became even more exciting when a famous dj had a crush on you. johnny was sure that it’s love at first sight. not putting both of your careers on the line, you two had no regrets when the time comes and you finally leave.

laundry day by @immabiteyou | s

- a domestic fluffy smut.

make a wish by @sluttyten | s f a

-  you’re jungwoo’s sister, and he’s made it clear he wants you and Johnny to have nothing to do with each other. so you and johnny start fake dating to piss him off.

want it all by @sluttyten | f s 

-  you are entirely innocent to the point of being naive. johnny is not innocent, but he loves that you are because it means he can teach you everything you don’t know.

sungchan

wish i was her by @softsungchan | f a 

-  you wished you were her, laying in Sungchan’s arms and feeling his warm breath on your neck, giggling about sweet nothings whispered into the starry night. You wished for it to be you, the girl he liked.

2:21 am by @the32ndbeat | f 

- sungchan being whipped, thru a text message.

haechan

14:52 by @ukiyoexo | f

- a cute haechan and reader ft the reader’s baby sister moment.

prince’s order by @nsheetee | f

-  prince haechan nurses you after you faint, and orders you to stay with him until you feel better.

sweet treat by @markresonates | s

-  haechan takes you for ice cream but all you can think about is sex with him.  when you act like a brat, eventually you end up in the bathroom. with no panties. 

clingy by @love-mi | f 

-  I’m not clingy! I just love your company and constantly want to be around you and have your full attention at all times

mark

hyuck is always right by @luvrenjun00 | f 

- ceo!mark x reader ft baby donghyuck. a tooth-rotting fluff.

taeyong

snow storm by @whereisten | f s 

- a fluffy smut whilst a snow storm.

1:59 by @smoll-tangerine | f

- reader and taeyong ft my favorite game (where i always die first) among us!

bts

taehyung

is this allowed 1 2 by @seokiie  | f s

- how were you supposed to know bts would be filming at your coffee shop today? how were you supposed to know a certain curly-haired boy would take a liking  to you?

cabin pressure | f by @jiminrings | f 

-  pilot!y/n who accidentally became famous bc of a viral post about her, best friend!jimin!, taehyung having a shy lil crush on you aND ot7 being meanies for a tad bit :((

art major!tae and biochem major!yn | f by @jiminrings | f

-  tae’s cold and probably needs a friend more than he needs a model, y/n feels this nEED to take care of him, a term of enderment then a dash of emotional constipation and a sprinkle of jealousy :D

gank mid lane by @kimtaehyunq | f s 

- gank / verb: (in a video game) use underhand means to defeat or kill (a less experienced opponent)

birthday surprise by @ephemeralkookie |

-  like every year, you prepare a little surprise for your boyfriend’s birthday, one that you’ve been preparing for days. and after a very tiring day, taehyung only wants to spend the night in your loving arms.

jungkook

cookies & cream | s by @1kook | f s 

-  jungkook will watch a thousand cheesy christmas movies if it meant making you happy. (and maybe having his dick sucked.)

unholy night | s by @ephemeralkookie | f s

-  after a christmas day passed with the Jeon’s family, Jungkook decides to transform the holy night into an unholy one.

‘a short’ abstinence | s a by @seokiie | s a

-  maybe blue-balling you boyfriend (who has an insanely high sexual drive) wasn’t the best.

in which she’s done with him by @minstrivia | a

-  jungkook angst/fluff where he always pushes oc away (who confesses her feelings but was cruelly rejected) and insults her but she always comes back to take care of him when he’s drunk or picks him up from his one night stands and she finally decides to leave him alone.

bad influence by @noteguk | s 

-  in which you know jungkook is a bad influence on you, but you can’t avoid falling for him every time.

jock!jk and shy art major!yn by @jiminrings | f

-  established relationship ft. jock!jk and shy art major!y/n, y/n gets an unexpected pep talk and jungkook doubts himself, and either so much tears or so much dUST according to kook

special affair by @1oserjk | f

-  sugar daddy au except it’s just jk spoiling u thru animal crossing

fairy of shampoo by @ironicarmy | f s

-  sundays are for relaxation, house cleaning, and happiness.

abstract ft bob ross by @mimithings97 | f

-  paintbrush in one hand, joint in the other and you sitting on his dick is what jeongguk wants. and what jeongguk wants, jeongguk gets.

badboy!jungkook by @jungshookz | f 

- badboy!jungkook falls for good girl reader ft the boys and the reader’s apple. 

growing by @lesgetittkookie | f

- dad!jungkook teacher his daughter how to walk. super super cute family/domestic fluff.

quiet, baby by @bratkook | s 

- i don’t how to write a summary on smuts so imma just put this. reader and jungkook doing something in the subway.

still want that by @whatifyoulivelikethat | s

-  fucking min yoongi ex-girlfriend? a terrible idea. being hopelessly in love with her at the same time? an even worse idea. knowing he was being used and still doing it anyway? ah, Jeon Jungkook, what are you doing? part 2 of savage love.

desiderium by @jeonggukingdom | f s 

-  “we’ve been at it like rabbits, how are you still so horny?”. a newlyweds!au smut.

chapstick by @softyoongiionly | f s

- based on the time Jungkook said he needed someone to scold him so he’d remember to put lip balm on. or jungkook’s had a really long day and the only that can make it better, is seeing you. 

lover boy by @jingukk | f 

-  jungkook likes you. a lot.

unexpected confession by @sunkissedjk | f

-  you gathered up the courage to confess your feelings, but it seems everyone in school knows about it before you could even find him.

string attached by @ephemeralkookie | s

-  jungkook is what we can call your sexfriend. No strings attached, just you and him having fun and releasing the huge pressure and stress of being idols. But after spending an entire day together, you realize that maybe he’s not just your sexfriend.

no title by @himbojk | f s 

- dilf jk.

astro

eunwoo

ceo!eunwoo by @m0onbean

no title by @yutopiada | f

- a cute idol!reader and eunwoo moment at a music show.

disney by @bangchan-sonyeondan | f

- a cute date with eunwoo at disney. reader likes vintage things hence using a disposable camera.

baby, it’s cold outside by @fresh-outta-jams | f 

- a cute cold christmas fluff with eunwoo ft. the boys. reader went to the boys’ place for a sweater and cocoa gift exchange.

got7

yugyeom

cruel brothers by @imsarabum | f

-  jackson and jaebum have always acted as if they were your big, overprotective brothers. so when they both walk in on you and yugyeom in a very intimate position, things get a little tense!

txt

soobin

a special night by @gyuluster | f

-  an intimate insight on the first night of choi soobin’s wedding, consisting of kitchen floors, witches and an eternity of love.

boughs & branches by @jeogiyall | f 

-  decorating the tree with boyfriend! choi soobin from txt! fluffity fluff fluff with a lot of cute fluff thrown in and a dash of christmastime fluff. 

sleepy binnie by @immabiteyou | s

-  “i’ll let you do anything if you just touch me now. “ a sleepy soobin smut.

cake by @immabiteyou | s

- reading waiting for mc soobin with the guys. a cute fluffy smut moment.

kpop oc/s

seri by @ggukkiedae

anyway, thank you again for the writers please take care and be safe!

please free to recommend your favorite fic that i haven’t feature yet.

if the links won’t work and i labelled some fics wrong please let me know and i’ll try to fix it as soon as possible!

support the fic and the writers!

[multimetaverse]

HSMTMTS 2x08 Review

Most Likely To was the best ep of S2 so far and ended one ship while launching another. Let’s dig in!

Gaston was super fun, a very nice showcase for both Larry and Matt. This is the kind of energy that early S2 was lacking. Also feels like the first ep where East High might actually have a shot at beating North High. Covid restrictions played a role but we really needed to see more rehearsal scenes and scenes of the wildcats just being theatre kids. This also may be one of the last times we see EJ perform as a student in the musical so I’m glad we got this.  

EJ has been criminally underused for most of S2, he’s marketed as part of the big 4 along with Nini, Ricky, and Gina and Matt Cornett’s name is listed 3rd in the credits but in the early eps of S2 you’d think he was guest star. Lately he’s started to become more important and tonight was an excellent showcase of why he’s such an interesting character. I’m not gonna check but this feels like it’s the most EJ screen time in a single ep that we’ve gotten all season long. 

Of course, the main reason for EJ’s increased screen time is because of Portwell. I’ve been neutral on them but tonight they really won me over’ their scenes were so sweet that they warmed even my cold black heart. Matt and Sofia are good friends irl and that shines through in their easy rapport and great chemistry. Gina snorting at EJ’s joke was cute and I loved the shot of Gina accidentally walking into the shot for EJ’s confessional. As an aside, they’ve been doing some fun stuff with the confessionals lately which helps add a bit of the metaness that helped make S1 so great.

The real big Portwell scene tonight was EJ and Gina talking on the couch at Ashlyn’s. Lot’s to love there. Gina’s speech to EJ about what she sees when she thinks of him was sweet and her saying that EJ tried to do the right thing and often failed but kept trying echoes what she said of herself during her confession to Ricky. Also when EJ asked Gina if she understood the feeling of having her life mapped out she replied, ‘’not really’’ which is almost certainly the inspiration for Gina asking a question to EJ and him responding ‘’not really’’ in their pre S2 face time call on the hsmtmts instagram. 

EJ is still wracked with guilt for the guy he used to be but Gina reminds him that he’s grown and is a good guy which leads to her slip up about her seeing him that way vs the rest of the gang hinting that she’s beginning to catch feelings for EJ. Which leads to EJ complimenting her and them having a moment that could well have led to a kiss if Ashlyn hadn’t come home. And they cap it off with Gina falling asleep and EJ covering her with his Duke sweater. 

It’s been nice not seeing Gina upset over Ricky these past two eps and it’s a damning indictment of the poor writing and pacing of S2 that her story in the first 6 eps can be summed up as Gina being upset over something Ricky said or did. Not only has Portwell allowed EJ to rise in prominence but also it’s allowed Gina to escape the rut her character was stuck in pining for Ricky. 

I hope after S2 is over that we get an interview where Tim explains how the Portwell plot came to be. The S1 finale set up some possible interest between them as did the pre S2 face time call but nothing came of it during the first 4 eps, they stood next to each other a lot but barely interacted otherwise. Notably in 2x01, which Tim himself wrote, EJ tries to grow a beard and tells Ashlyn that he says her as so young which is extremely jarring now that we know that EJ is crushing on Gina who is Ashlyn’s age. 

Was Tim not set on doing Portwell until he realized he needed to give Gina something else to do other than hopelessly pine for Ricky? Narratively, it made sense after Rini got together in S1 to put the other two Big 4 characters together in S2 but did Tim not want it to seem so obvious to the audience so he deliberately kept Portwell apart until 2x05 where EJ’s feelings make for a nice plot twist? Was he just reluctant to plug EJ back into the love square due to how much more complicated it would make things but later felt he had no other options? Or was it just plain old bad pacing and writing?

Of course, I wish that there wasn’t such a large age gap between Sofia and Matt but there are no Gina ships that avoid that problem, there’s also an age gap between Sofia and Joshua, just as there was between Olivia and Joshua and Matt in S1. Depending on when they film S3 there’s a good chance that most of it will be finished before Sofia even turns 18 which is deeply unfortunate. There’s a broader issue of teen girls being cast in mostly age appropriate roles while their male love interests are older adults and in particular it often affects female characters of colour. Netflix has a really bad track record with those kind of age gaps but Disney has problems too as we’ve seen on HSMTMTS and on GMW where by the end of S3 they had 18 year old Peyton Meyer as the boyfriend of 14 year old Rowan Blanchard’s character (not to mention canon Joshaya which didn’t have such a bad age gap between the actors but was problematic regarding the ages of the characters themselves).

A knock I’ve seen on Portwell is that EJ is just gonna leave for university next year but that was never gonna happen, Matt’s under the same 4 season contract as all the other mains and he’ll be sticking around in some capacity much like Sharpay ended up doing in the movies. It is true that EJ will probably have to move on at the end of S4 while Gina still has her senior year left but that will also happen with her and Ricky since he’ll be graduating at the end of S4. It was a big mistake to make EJ a senior but it also may end up being a big mistake to make Gina a sophomore. It would have been too messy to retcon EJ to be a junior but Tim probably should have taken the chance to retcon Gina into being a junior in S2.

That Rini breakup was so sad (missed opportunity for gotta go my own way). They managed to get in a Troyella reference with the treehouse. This was inevitable they just have not been communicating well though now that we know that Ricky thought Nini left YAC for him some of his desperation to spend as much time together as possible makes more sense. I think Rini is endgame if the series has 4 seasons but it wouldn't shock me if we never seem them dating again and they only get back together in the series finale. It also wouldn’t surprise me if Nini never dates anyone else for the remainder of the series or at least not seriously. 

We’re not even halfway through the series so it’s way too early to permanently slam the door on Rini though this time apart will probably help Joshua and Olivia move on from their own bitter break up before it bleeds too much into their performances. I do wonder if Tim really has a clue what he's gonna do with them for the remaining 24-28 eps of the series, assuming S3 and S4 have 10-12 eps each. 

Roman Banks killed If I Can’t Love Her and the montage of all the couples or ex couples was great.

It was nice to finally meets some parents other than the Bowen’s and Salazar-Roberts’. Kourtney’s mom was played by Dara’s actual mother and their dynamic was great as expected. It seems from their conversation that Kourtney's father is dead which I don’t believe has been mentioned before. Cash Caswell.... well it gets what the character is about across. He really looks and sounds like a rich Utah republican, I bet he knows Mitt Romney personally. I liked EJ going to tell his father that he’s not going to Duke and recognizing that he wants to build his own life on his own merits. 

We saw a bit of that S1 Miss Jenn energy tonight which was fun though I didn't like how curt she was with Seb nor did I like how rude Carlos was to Seb although we know that blows up in 2x10. 

Jazzara rising! I really liked how Jazzara and Portwell are sort of mirroring each other and since Mazzara knows about EJ’s feelings for Gina it wouldn’t shock me if helping EJ out is part of him showing a softer side in 2x12.

Of course Ashlyn is VP of the Nostradamus society. It's clear her family has some kooky new age beliefs (her parents are probably members of some naturopathic medicine group on Facebook that doubles as a gateway into Qanon)

It was nice to see Big Red being such a good friend to Ricky and the return of Ricky’s infamous pillow hugs. Lmao at Ashlyn just chilling while Big Red is comforting Ricky

Also Miss Jenn saying sexy and Big Red referring to pillow talk, the writers are adding a bit of spice when cooking up these scripts.

Looking Ahead: 

Looks like Gina may be wearing EJ's duke sweater next ep according to some posts I saw. Jack presumably is there to somehow help Gina decide what she wants with Ricky and EJ though him having wanderlust might also feed into Gina’s thoughts on settling down in SLC or moving with her mom around the country.

Let's see what mom of the year, Lynne Bowen, has up her sleeves. Ricky’s bedroom at her place in Chicago looks much nicer than the apartment Mike Bowen has so perhaps she makes a lot more money than he does. 

Not looking forward to the Zoom portions of the ep but I guess it was inevitable. 

There’s only two paths for Gina’s story to go in the remainder of this season; either she decides to move on from Ricky and give EJ a chance or she decides that Ricky is worth trying again and squelches her budding feelings for EJ. The former looks much more likely after tonight’s ep but either way it needs to be handled with care. Inevitably Gina and Ricky need to talk about what happened between them but if Tim really wants Ricky to continue being a viable love interest or even a good friend to Gina then he needs to really have Ricky apologize and show a thoughtful, kinder side of him that’s largely been missing this season. 

What I think Tim is doing is setting up Portwell getting together in 2x12 but Ricky pining over Gina until Portwell break up late S3 and Rina get together in the S3 finale before they break up later in S4 and Ricky gets back with Nini near the end of the series. If I had Tim’s ear I would tell him that he should pick which ship he wants to do, Rina or Portwell, but don’t do both. He wants canon Rina? Great then end Portwell before it starts and have Rina happen in S3 and introduce other obstacles to them getting together rather than having to damage EJ’s character and make him lose another girl he likes to Ricky. He wants canon Portwell? Great then have Gina and Ricky’s conversation be closure for the both of them and have Gina and EJ get together and break them up without Ricky being a cause of it or waiting in the wings to get with Gina soon afterwards. Doing both will be a disaster and I truly hope that Tim Federle carefully thinks over his mistakes in S2 and really plans out the remaining 2 seasons of the series while there’s still time to prevent things from going really off the rails like GMW and AM did thanks to the bad decisions of Michael Jacobs and Terri Minsky. 

Until next week wildcats. 

[petri808]

1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 10 | 11 | 12 | 13 | 14 | 15 | 16 | 17 | 18 | 19 | 20 | 21 | 22 | 23 | 24 | 25 | 26 | 27 | 28 | 29 | 30 | 31 | 32 | 33-Epilogue

— I just wanna say thank you so much to everyone who followed along, your comments and suggestions along the way really helped to bring this story to life! It’s my longest fic to date, and to think it started as a one-shot for nalu day 2020 lol. YOU GUYS HELPED MAKE THIS HAPPEN! 🥳🥰🥰 ILY YOU ALL!💜💜💜💜

@mcornilliac special shout out for you help with the toughest part 😘

Even after all these years, riding on a train still brought a small flutter to Lucy’s stomach as she remembered the long ago evening when she’d met her husband. From an innocent meeting to a death defying experience, talk about a roller coaster ride. And yet, if she had to do it all over again, Lucy wouldn’t change a thing. Crazy sounding yes, for why would anyone not want to avoid what she’d gone through? Touka had truly pushed her sanity to the breaking point, but well, the therapist was right in the end and Lucy felt almost invincible now. All that pain, all the struggle she’d pushed through had made her the strong and resilient woman she was today. Happily married to Natsu with their fraternal twins Nashi and Ryuu. Mrs. Natsu Dragneel, Lucy smiled to herself, there was no way she’d change a thing.

Of course, it hadn’t been easy. After Natsu proposed and Lucy had accepted, there were still a lot of work to be done. But that measure of acceptance and affection did wonders. Any worries she’d had that he wouldn’t want a broken woman melted away and gave her the confidence to get better. With each passing therapy session, her strength grew, and by the time they graduated college, Lucy could honestly say she’d been cured to a functional degree. No longer struggling through nightmares and panic attacks, her anxieties were under control and the debilitating depression a distant memory where it belonged.

Yeah... Lucy sighed happily as she watched the landscape pass by from her train seat. Meeting Natsu was the best thing to ever happen in her life, well, aside from the kids. They’d married about a year after graduation on the anniversary of their meeting. It was a beautiful affair at an indoor venue, with close friends and family to join them. They’d gone a more modern route for the ceremony but did take pictures at a garden dressed in the traditional attire for sentimental reasons. Lucy wore the shiromuku white kimono while Natsu a montsuki haori hakama. And no, it wasn’t train themed! Levy was the Maid of Honor and Gray was the best man. By then, Levy and Gajeel were also married and Gray in a serious relationship with a girl named Juvia Lockser. Lucy was so happy for them both. All of their lives were moving in the right direction.

Everything was perfect. Great jobs in their fields of interest, lives settled into a comfortable routine, when 5 years later Lucy was pregnant with fraternal twins. It was a total surprise since twins didn’t run in either of their families. Always the jovial optimist, Natsu joked that they’d been doubly blessed because of what they’d gone through, and Lucy couldn’t help but love such a concept. Of course, once the euphoria of the motherhood prospect waned, reality set in that she was having twins! Two! Double the babies meant double of everything, from the pregnancy concerns to raising them. Growing up without a mother and as an only child, Lucy didn’t have a lot of experience with small children. But Natsu patiently assured her, that she’d do just fine. Think of it as a new challenge, and after overcoming one pretty tough situation, this would be a walk in the park. On the bright side, Levy was also pregnant with the couple’s first child so the two best friend’s kids would grow up together.

And Natsu was right, there were a few bumps in the road but nothing too difficult. During her fourth month Lucy was diagnosed with gestational diabetes as well as some minor gastrointestinal issues, so Natsu swayed the doctor to put her on bed rest. Better safe than sorry. The babies were healthy, but by the 7th month, she really couldn’t move much, and she was miserable being stuck at home all the time. Lucy missed her job because she genuinely enjoyed working for the magazine. But in the end, it had been a good thing. She could manage her health easier that way and it gave her time to do something she’d thought about doing as part of the healing process. With Natsu’s support and permission, it was time to put her writing skills to good use and write a book about their experience.

It became an instant hit, especially with female readers. The book was not only an autobiographical reflection of what had happened to them but focused on shining a light on the dangers of stalkers, as well as the importance of taking the warning signs seriously. Lucy didn’t hold back in her re-telling, even pointing out the serious flaws in Japan’s laws in protecting citizens from stalkers which at the time were nonexistent. Feminist organizations working to change those laws used her story with permission for their cause. She had no intentions of becoming a poster child for the movement, but in the end her role may have played its part, because 2 years after the publishing, Japan finally adopted anti-stalking laws making it easier for police to string together harassment cases, as well as for victims to get the help they needed.

Her life was nothing but exciting to say the least! And with two young children, now age 10 certainly kept them on their toes. Their daughter Nashi was just like Natsu, very outgoing, friendly, but a bit of a daredevil while her brother Ryuu born 4 minutes after her was the quieter of the two. He preferred books like his mother to adventure. Of course, that never stopped Nashi from dragging him into shenanigans! But the best part was how close they still were and fiercely protective of each other. Lucy and Natsu couldn’t be prouder of them and hoped this would continue throughout their lifetimes.

Fifteen years... come to think of it, their wedding anniversary was coming up shortly. With Natsu now a senior fire inspector for the Tokyo prefectural government, he was often busy. Lucy did mind it, because frankly it gave her some peace and quiet. She chuckled at the thought. Not that it was all that peaceful with the twins. But she digressed. His success meant their lives were very comfortable, and her own journalism successes while not as financially based, were still celebrated in their relationship. Natsu never waned in being the dutiful and supportive, always loving husband that Lucy felt blessed to grow old with.

‘Two more stops, pick up the kids from school, stop at the grocery store for dinner...’ Lucy tapped out on her phone a to-do list of ingredients to pick up at the store. Perhaps katsudon... ‘Mmm, or maybe nabe,’ hot-pot soup since it was expected to be a bit chilly that evening.

Lucy looked up briefly, really just spacing out in thought when someone catches her eye. At the other end of the train car, she noticed a woman facing slightly away, but enough to where she couldn’t quite see a face. It couldn’t be... Lucy looked away not wanting to stare, but somehow... for some reason the woman was awfully familiar... looking exactly like Touka. Well, not exactly, but enough to make the hair on the back of her neck stand up. It was a blonde, with a different hair style— and that could always be changed. Similar body type, the facial side-profile features that Lucy could see resembled Touka...

Now despite being better, her anxieties still bubbled up from time to time, so she immediately switched to her coping techniques to calm them down. ‘You’re fine,’ Lucy talked herself through it, ‘no point in getting riled up.’ The woman hadn’t done so much as looked in her direction, so it must be okay. Contrary to popular belief, things like depression and anxiety never fully goes away, especially when someone has experienced a severe level of it. Those emotions and irrational thoughts are forever programmed into the brain, but there are ways to keep them at bay and Lucy’s successfully done just that for 15 years.

‘Just go back to what you were doing. Katsudon or nabe? And don’t forget you need to pick up milk...’ But, fifteen years... could Touka have been released by now? Lucy shook the thought away again. ‘Stop it! Everything is fine. It’s not her!’ The train was semi-full of passengers all minding their own business... including the woman. There was no reason to start panicking now. Lucy adjusts her position on her seat away from the woman’s direction. If she couldn’t see her, she could pretend she didn’t exist. ‘Maybe I should pick up ingredients for both, that way I don’t have to shop tomorrow.’ Lucy thought to herself, and with the kids with her, they could help in carrying the shopping bags. ‘Yeah, we’ve got a plan…’

After figuring out her shopping list, Lucy pulled up social media to keep herself distracted and for a few minutes it did the trick. Silly videos of entertainers never got old. The train reached the next stop and she felt it come to a stop. Since it wasn’t hers, she didn’t pay it any mind as she scrolled through her feed. But as the disembarking passengers funnel past Lucy, her eyes pick up on a pair of pink high-heels peeking from over the edge of her phone. Her body instantly stiffened up from the similarity to the ones worn by the woman, while her curiosity slowly got the better of her. ‘Breath, act nonchalant!’ Lucy’s eyes tracked the high-heels moving past her until they left her periphery. She then slowly sat back up, pretending to readjust her position, when she caught a pair of eyes looking back. Lucy’s breathing hitches with a shaky exhale. “Oh, my god—"

Standing at the doorway with one hand on the frame, the blonde woman smiled at Lucy then winked before stepping off the train.

It was Touka!

[known-as-naya]

What’s your favourite thing about the Klebekah dynamic and your fave scenes? What was it that drew you to them

Thanks Yuki for asking this, it took me hours to think of all my fav scenes but it was worth it lol ❤️

My fav thing about the klebekah dynamic:

So, klebekah. I simply love them if it isn't obvious by now lmao, their codependent and dysfunctional toxic relationship fascinates me so much. They're litteraly the most important person in each other's life and I love that, I love how they understand one another with just a look, I love how they never gave up on each other for a thousand years despite all the betrayals, I love how they adore and worship one another, I LOVE THEM.

Rebekah was the person klaus loved the most in the world (besides hope ofc) it's actually funny how most of the fandom doesn't realize the impact she always had on him, she was his humanity for a thousand years, she was his constant (along with Elijah ) and he was hers, and as we saw on the show Rebekah was the person he showed affection the most.

As for rebekah, Klaus was the man she ADORED since she was a little girl, he was her big brother, the person she wanted to be like when she gets older, her protector, soulmate and best friend. Rebekah was the only person who never actually tried to change him, she loved him as he is during a thousand years and I LOVE THAT.

-The thing that drawn me to them:

Are a lot of things but THE CHEMISTRY was what made me fall in love, fun fact: but the first time I discovered klebekah I was watching a tvd scene on YouTube a couple of years ago and coincidentally it was their 3×03 Chicago flashback scene with Stefan, and I thought they were a sort of threesome of something lmao and when I knew they were siblings I was shocked but continued to ship them anyway cause why not.

What are your fav scenes ?

Oh boy, this is a very DIFFICULT question cause I practically love all their freaking scenes, but I eventually have to choose so there you go:

-I'll begin with tvd:

-There's 3×03, of course, THIS WHOLE EPISODE IS FULL OF INCEST. the "I'm not your girlfriend", the "choose him or me" Klaus' jealousy, the eye sex, the daggering session, the hand holding, EVERYTHING SCREAMED KLEBEKAH. This ep was such a strong introduction to their strange dynamic.

-3×04: my fav thing about this ep is Klaus taking rebekah to shop and being a child about it. He was so done with her already but at the same time so happy to have her around again. I loved the surprised expression on Stefan's face the whole time, he was not used to this side of Klaus, he was not used to Klaus being wrapped around someone's little finger. I loved their little conversation when she was trying that dress and she said something about women in the 21th century dressing like prostitues and that she got dirty looks for wearing trousers and then Klaus said you wore trousers so women today could wear nothing. Lmaooo it was hilarious.

- 3×15: "I hated you when I learned that you killed our mother but after a thousand years together as a family you're the only one who never left me "

" Aren't we a pair ?" THIS MF LINE GETS ME EVERYTIME. I don't have words to describe what it does to me but I love this scene and the fact that Klaus thought that rebekah was going to show him her torturer's skills makes it better.

-3×18: " you destroyed our family" "I wanted a family they just didn't want me, and now that we're unlinked we're no longer responsible for each other" "so are you leaving ?" "As soon as a get my stakes I'm gone..... I'm gonna make a NEW FAMILY of hybrids" "and if I choose to stay ?" "Then you're just as pathetic as Finn " THIS WHOLE scene was a masterpiece, them looking at each other like that makes me wanna give them a hug:

-3×20: it wasn't really a klebekah scene cause it was Esther in Rebekah's body but the way Klaus smiled at her and agreed to go to the dance JUST for her melt my heart.

-3×22: oh gosh this one, breaks my heart but love it so much " how dare you save Caroline over me ?" " You left me !" "it's always been me, not Finn not Elijah no Kol ME, I LOVED YOU through everything and you don't even care " and then he chokes her and say something he -IM SURE- regrets immediately "you know something rebekah you're right I don't care, from this moment on you're not my family you're not my sister you are nothing " and then he breaks her neck. I HATE THIS SCENE BUT I LOVE IT. these two needed couple therapy. Klaus was horrible, she watched him die, she mourned him, her heart broke. He could've told her about his plan tho ? I'm still wondering why he didn't but I guess he was just being an asshole as usual and took her as granted. And him saving Caroline over her was not it.

-4×04: the flashback hunter scene "YOU TRUSTED HIM OVER ME " "WHAT DID HE PROMISE YOU " "TELL ME REBEKAH " it was like he caught her cheating on him lmaooo. On the same episode there's the famous line "laugh at the girl who loved too easily but I would rather to live my life than yours Nik, no one will ever sit around a table telling stories about a man who couldn't love" the way he looked down after her saying that breaks my heart, cause Klaus could love, he LOVES her, then he daggers her -cause he's a paranoid bastard- and he cries about it.

-Let's switch to TO scenes:

-1×02: this episode is one of my favs but the best scene was when Klaus was choking Hayley after he learned that she wanted to abort the baby then, rebekah slammed him against the wall (it was hot tbh lmao) and she said "it's okay to care, it's okay to want something that's all Elijah was trying to do all he's ever wanted for you, all we've ever wanted." The way he looked her deep in the eyes gets me everytime, he was trying so hard not to cry. Then they sat together, exhausted, and Klaus told her about his plan -that involved giving Elijah to marcel lol- and if she doesn't like it, there's the door.

-1×03: one of my fav episodes too and it has so many good klebekah scenes, “that depends what plan you mean love my plan for global domination or rebekahs plan to find love in a cruel cruel world”  then she giggled and threw a pen at him so lovingly lol. They were teasing and all flirty with each other in front of Hayley and they acted as nothing happened the night before and Klaus never gave Elijah to marcel, after that they teamed up and everything was going fine but Klaus happened. then there's the masquerade ball scene when Klaus called rebekah " you really are a hideously evil little thing aren't you "

and them being jealous watching marcel and cami dancing. later in  this ep theres the famous “you disgust me” scene, the tension was so thick i acually thought they were about to kiss and have sex on that damn piano lmao but klaus as usual disapointed rebekah, she trusted him against all her better instincts and he choose to act against her back cause he thought his plan was smarter.

-I'm not sure in which episode this scene is but I remember Klaus telling rebekah "you were quite resourceful today..... sometimes I think I don't give you your due little sister" it was so cute cause Klaus knows that he doesn't give Rebekah enough credits, and she was so happy to hear him say that.

-1×14: the famous "YOU CANNOT HIDE FROM ME REBEKAH" this episode had me crying the first time I watched it, Klaus was so angry, disappointed and hurt, he could not believe that his baby sister did this to him, that he was in denial for almost a century and he for that she must pay. "Rebekah would not call my father no matter how angry she was " "enough of your lies" even after seeing the truth from the source he still couldn't believe it cause he loved her so freaking much and he thought she did too.

Then them fighting and Klaus getting turned on by her beating his ass up

-1×15: this mf scene.

The kiss, THE FREAKING CLOSE TO THE LIPS KISS. the sexual tension in this scene was HUGE, Klaus finally "set rebekah free" and he was DRUNK doing it. "We don't have to run anymore, we've found a home" and the look on Rebekah's face is priceless, she was shocked and almost guilty cause at this time she has already called mikeal and Klaus was a little too late.

Also in the same episode, THE BLOOD SHARING. Look at them just look at them.

-1×16:

THE BABY MIKAELSON FLASHBACK !! OMG, this scene melts my heart. "Don't be afraid I won't let it hurt you " "will you stay with me till the storm ends ?" And he did stay with her no matter what. I love this scene cause it shows how close and protective they were of each other since forever. Then he gives her the wooden knight so she can be brave. I'm soft.

Then there's this one too ! I love how Rebekah was actually the only one to ever stand against mikeal, she even tried to kill him, just for Klaus. So much devotion.

I'm still not over this one, the hurt on Rebekah's voice as she says those words, Klaus's tears, the whole episode was so angsty but this scene was IT. and then he realised what he did to her, that instead of protecting her he was hurting and suffocating her so he did something he's not used to do, being selfless, and he let her go.

The 1×22 scene: LITTERALY on top of my fav scenes list ! Klaus giving hope to Rebekah proved how much he trusted her "there's no one I would trust more with my daughter's life" and the fact that she came back just for him (and hope) proved that she never really wanted to leave, she just needed a little freedom. Then when he handed her the little toy I WAS IN TEARS OKAY, it was so soft. They were so happy and relieved to see each other again.

-2×09: "if anything goes south I'll be there to pull you out" "you and I on the same team it must me Christmas" he promised to protect her at any cost and she knew he will. Them teaming up against Esther was so great, then the "take me instead" , Klaus was WILLING to sacrifice his immortal life for REBEKAH, if this isn't pure love then I don't know what it is.

-2×17: another episode losing his shit because his wife-sorry sister is in danger. He let Freya enter his mind just to save her (and he was so suspicious about it cause he didn't want her to know his strategies but in fact he was just afraid she'll know about his questionable taste in woman lmaoo)

And this mf scene is so cute, look at their smiles, the forehead touch, his hand on her neck, here on his arm, FOR YOU FOR NOW. I can't believe this is actually canon.

-2×22: "family tradition!" "Minus the family."

"Well, you're here."" In the skin of your choosing, no less."

"Well, poor you. Because that body is such a hardship."

"You would hand over your crown? And do what?" "Raise my daughter... with the help of my sisters. One big, happy family."

" Now, that does sound grand-- minus the giant, Elijah-sized hole in the room. And, whilst your sisters raise your child, what will the child's mother be doing, exactly?"

"This, dear brother, is not what happiness looks like."

This scene was so important, Klaus was wrong and he needed someone to remind him that what he did was not necessary, that he hurt most of his family, and rebekah was there for that. He wished she'd stray with him to "raise" his daughter but after this scene we see Freya offering her Eva's body so she leaves.

-3×09: "you're always leaving" "and I always come back" THEN THE DAMN HUG. their hugs are always so good, the way they close their eyes and hold each other tight and they seem like they never want to let go of each other. Then she has to leave and make Elijah dagger her without telling Nik, cause she wants Nik to be happy for once.

-3×22: "wasn't you who once told me I could talk my way out of hell " and then they smile affectionately at each other and HUG tightly. After this he took her hand and they both walk to their possible end, and she watches him getting stabbed by marcel after she was forced to say all those things she did and didn't think. The whole trial scene was a masterpiece. I love it.

-4×02: this EP was full of klebekah soft scenes. There was the reunion HUG . the way she runs to him the second she sees him and the way he reaches to her and hugs her tightly to his chest.

The kiss on the cheek after "thank you for not abandoning me" and the way he smiles at her was so SOFT OMG.

-4×03: the goodbye hug "Nik you do not need me anymore, I know that I'm your fav sibling and of course I adore you" "you were the only one who never treated me like s misfit, for centuries my only place was by your side...." AND THEY HUG TIGHTLY AGAIN. this was the first time Klaus let Rebekah do whatever the hell she wanted without fighting or daggering and it was revolutionary to her. (The fact that she's his fav sibling and she KNOWS it makes me so happy lmao).

-5×01: their phone call about Elijah. They were both so lost and devastated without him it broke my heart. "How does he look?" "Happy.."

-5×08: "ah Nik always so dramatic"

They were so happy to be reunited after 7 years of being apart, look at them hugging each other so tightly. I LOVE this scene.

-5×12: then there's the goodbye scene, Klaus gave her the cure so he can make up for a thousand years of hurt, "live the life you've always wanted to live, MY SISTER" the way he looked at her so proudly, so in love makes me cry. In my opinion he gave her the cure so they can reunite again in the afterlife. Both him and Elijah can't live or die without her, they're supposed to be together, they're meant to be together and the cure will bring her to them, to him, again. It was such a good scene, the hug, the last glances, everything.

And that's it!!! I'm sure I forgot some other scenes but those are the most important. ❤️

[chaos-writes]

Billy Loomis and Stu Macher: Ghost in the Flesh

Warning: 14+ Swearing. Gore. Word count: 1,688

No party was as good as the ones hosted by Stu Macher. An 18 year old Rich Bitch senior, whose parents decided they could trust him with the house while they went on vacation somewhere in the Bahamas. He was also a piece of eye candy, along with his buddy, the ‘Definition-of-Teen-Angst’ Billy Loomis. He's that one ride or die friend of the school. You see, these guys are popular. While they may not be the jock d-bags of the highschool superiority complex, they are known around here for being party animals. Stu is also the goofiest in the school, the class comedian, if you will.

Me? I’m just… there. Look, Stu is throwing a massive party tonight. I’m not gonna flirt or anything. I just wanna get some beer and bounce. No biggie. In’n’out.

Okay, I'm a little freaked out. I don't wanna bump into a dude named Randy Meeks, a guy who's built like a weasel and acts like one too. He's a horror movie fanatic who acts like school is an actual movie, well, a horror movie. I really have nothing against him, he's a good dude, but still. I'd rather not talk to him.

The whole school day I spent pondering about the party. I found myself daydreaming about Bill- err… watching the movie at the party. Casey and I couldn't stop talking about it. We’re best friends, so we do a lot together.

I rented out the Robin movie and skedaddle. Randy was screaming and I wanted none of that. I go home and put the movie on the counter. "Mom? Hey, I brought a movie home! I know you'll love it!"

School is over for the weekend and I head to the video store on my walk home. Randy is stocking shelves as usual. I look at the comedy section; ooh, my family will love this one! It's a Robin Williams movie! And there he is, Party Man himself. Stu Macher, picking on weasel dude. I see Billy, talking to a group of girls who swoon at his slightest movement (ewww).

It was getting closer to 8. I watched that movie with my parents and ate. I did my homework, cleaned my room, and showered. I set out for the 10-minute walk to Stu's house. Instead, I got a phone call. "Hey, it's Billy. Do you need a ride here?" Right, I gave him my number to help study.

"Well, the house is just a 10 minute walk away-"

"Why don't you just let me pick you up? Shorten that time."

"Uhm, ok then. You need my address?"

"N-... yea, I do."

A few minutes later, I see the car of one of the most popular guys at school pull up in front of my house. Gee, that was fast. "Hey, mom? I'm gonna hang out with my buddies tonight. I'll call you before I leave for home."

I'm in his car. I'm in his car. I'm in his car. Oh my god. Ok, he's cute. But I can't freak out like this. "You- ah, ok there?" He says. "O- oh, yea, I'm sorry, just zoned out." I stammer. His car smells like cologne and it's very clean. And he's right next to me. Billy Loomis. Sitting in his car. Next to a loser.

“Hey, you know Stu and I are close, right?” Billy said. “Of course I do! You guys are double trouble!” I giggled. He laughs. God, that laugh. It was so melodic, so… perfect. “Well, we’ve been thinking about getting closer with you. Y’know, we’re not very close. We wish that was different. You’re very kind, and you have such a great personality.” He admitted. I stare blankly for a second. Hey, did he take a back road? “I like that idea,” I said. He looked at me with those gorgeous brown eyes. “Yeah?” 

I nodded and smiled. I can’t believe this! He smiles and giggles lightly to himself. A solid minute went by in silence before we pulled into his driveway. We got there early so we waited in the car a bit. “Hey, that ride took as long as the walk would've taken,” “well, i wanted to have enough time to talk to you,” He says. 

“That’s okay, I like long car rides anyways.” I said.

I walked with Billy into Stu's front door. Wow, this place is, just, beautiful. Stu walks right past me, straight to Billy. They start quietly talking together, Billy tosses a glance at me and Stu looks and smiles at me, I had no choice but to smile back. I was a guest in his house after all; you're supposed to be polite to your hosts.

It made me nervous. Really nervous. I wasn't thinking at all. I walked into the kitchen to cool down, that was really weird. Stu walked over to me after the two were done talking. He was actually really nice to me and we had a really fun conversation about aliens and whether or not they’re real. He did impressions of what he thought they would look like. He's such a goofball.

He handed me a beer and sat me down on the couch, right next to him. Wow, he is tall sitting next to me. I took a swig and decided you know what? I can stay for more than a beer. It's all good. I’m not big into horror movies and Stu knew this, so he explained all the lore behind Halloween while we were watching it. 

I think one of the boys said something to Randy, because he hasn't even looked at me, not once, the whole night. Not even during his little ramble about the "rules" about being in a horror movie, or whatever.

During the movie, Stu noticed that I was cold. He told me I could go upstairs to grab his sweater. So, I head upstairs very cautiously, looking for the sweater. He said his room, right? 

I then feel swift footsteps behind me and an arm wrap around my throat. Shit! I'm in a blood choke! I couldn't get out. Everything just faded. 

I woke up in Stu's bed, I must've been out for hours. I stumble and try to fight myself awake. I feel so weak. I stumble down the stairs and begin shaking at the sight.

The whole house was a bloodbath. Randy was tied up and soaked in blood, dead. Sydney was dead. 

Casey, oh God, Casey, mutilated beyond recognition and hanging from a tree outside the house. I can’t breathe. I can’t imagine how scared she was. Did she call for help? Could I have saved her?

The only people left were me, Billy, and Stu. They were soaked in blood and covered in stab wounds.

The police were on their way. I tried my best to help Stu, he was practically mutilated. I put pressure on his wounds and moved on to Billy. He wasn't as bad but he was losing a lot of blood.

I don't know why the killer didn't finish me off after I was unconscious.

The wait at the hospital was long. There were police officers and social workers and doctors talking to me, asking weird questions, and it was all happening so fast and I was so scared. I couldn't think, my head felt like it was splitting open. Casey, what did they do to you? Oh God, I’m so sorry.

The boys were in emergency surgery. A nurse came into the waiting room. "Hey, the boys are out of surgery. You can go and visit them, although it would be a while before they wake up."

I get into the hospital room and there they are. A shared hospital room with 2 empty beds opposite of 2 occupied beds. They're both asleep, hooked up to oxygen, connected to wires and tubes of all sorts. It was almost as scary as seeing them drenched in blood back at that party. Well, massacre.

I drag a chair in between the beds, pull the dividing curtain back farther, and wait. I sit and think about the party, how Stu was so tall sitting next to me on his couch, how Billy just... offered me a ride. The ride itself. It seems a little insane but do they... have feelings for me?

After I moved to the woodsboro district, both boys broke up with their girlfriends within a week from each other. It kinda sucks because I liked Sidney and Tatum, and now they want nothing to do with me-

"Hmmm...?" Stu slowly opened his eyes and lifted his head. "I had no idea you'd be here." He said in a tired, raspy voice.

"Hi, Stu. I just wanted to check up on you boys. You guys were really badly hurt. I feel awful, I could've done more to help."

"Honey, it's okay. Besides, imagine how badass these scars are gonna look when they heal over!"

"You big goof!" I giggled. Billy stirred in his bed. He lifted his head, rubbed his eyes, and groaned. "Hey, how did it go ove-" he stopped mid sentence. Both he and Stu shared looks of horror between me and themselves.

Why are they acting so strange?

Oh no.

Oh God.

I felt my heart stop in my chest. They didn’t. They couldn’t have. Casey… 

“You… you were the killers?” I said in a soft, shaky voice. Billy smoothed his voice, “Now what makes you think we were the killers?”

“The… the phone call, the conversation at the front door, the… oh God, Casey!” I broke into sobs. I couldn't help it. They killed my best friend! 

“Hey, it’s not like that. We never meant to hurt you…” Stu pleaded. 

Billy’s expression turned from amusement to horror as he watched tears slip down my cheeks. Both were silent as they leaned in from their beds and wrapped their arms around me. “How can we make it up to you, beautiful?” Billy asked.

Silence fell over what seemed like the whole world.

“Stay with me. That’s the least you can do.”

 “Of course, sweetness.” Billy said.

[romanceboys]

(interview) vogue korea april issue 2020 - perfect taemin

1. superm was another chance for taemin’s ever-evolving performance to be showcased. i thought a lot about how to create synergy with these exceptional performers. to put it simply, i wanted us to come off as energetic. but these days i’ve had a change of heart. our identity is definitely important. rather than just working hard, for superm to show off their colours well we need to show our personalities; we should be seen as one team. to be able to formulate a solid and clear colour is our homework. that’s why it’s regrettable. we couldn’t come up with a novel choreography to carry our new identity. we tried a lot in the practice room. superm seems to have found its musical identity but hasn’t gotten a hold of its performance character yet. the stages are too vague. 2. now that you are finally promoting with your best friend kai in one group, you two must’ve shared your concerns. since this friend is someone who has a lot of passion and ambition, he talks about various things. for instance, this style is pretty good, this choreography is quite trendy. thanks to him i’ve learned a lot. he is also very knowledgeable about the latest ‘hottest’ genres. we talk about these things often and even watch videos together. kai gives off ‘popular’ vibes. compared to him, my interests are quite unusual. nowadays kai is interested in music while i am into science. 3. is it science fiction? these days we’ve been watching videos on the theory of relativity and quantum mechanics together. 4. what aspect of it interested you? originally i was very curious, after seeing a recommended video on youtube i learned about quantum mechanics for the first time. i couldn’t understand the explanation, even those who were explaining it said it was a difficult concept. that was very fascinating to me. kind of like magic.  5. are you reading books on the subject too? the subjects of the books i read are different (laughs). there’s a book that was published long ago called ‘regarding the pain of others.’ it is a pessimistic book that gathers contradictory opinions of people for instance ‘people find joy in the pain of others, it is instinctual.’ as a celebrity, there are times when you are criticized but there are also times when you receive comfort from people. rather than blaming others, while reading this book, i began to think ‘people are like that, at most i shouldn’t behave like them.’ my interests are all over the place. 6. what makes you and kai click? we converse well. our opinions almost never clash and we respect each other. moreover, we fully understand our own roles in superm. 7. what position do you hold in superm? since i can’t ask if it’s the main dancer. in pictures and interviews, i’m the center. baekhyun hyung is the leader (laughs). 8. when the conversation wasn’t flowing well during the talkshow interview, i saw you neatly concluding it.  that does happen. nct and wayv are still in the learning phase. that’s why i first listen to all of their thoughts during interviews then flesh it out with details later. 9. compared to when you set out abroad as shinee then promoting overseas as superm now, the status of k-pop has changed. looking at how superm was able to start off with an arena tour in the us and europe made me feel that k-pop is a ‘hot’ topic. in the past, we’d use venues of this scale for smtown concerts. even if you promote mainly in asia, seeing the audience section will make you realise the perception of k-pop has changed. 10. though k-pop’s scope has expanded and diversified, its definition has become simple. what are your concerns? my first concern is language. after i was able to communicate via language during my japanese activities, there were so many advantages. though each country overseas has its own language, i felt that i needed to learn english first. there are many international fans who want to experience the chemistry between our members, they’d feel much closer to us if we communicated using (a common) language. k-pop isn’t one dimensional. it’s not only about the music, there is music video, style, etc. included. people would make dance covers in the past, now they even emulate the styling. all of this is korean pop culture. 11. superm were on the ellen degeneres show and jimmy kimmel live. before we went on the ellen show we really rehearsed the interview a lot. america’s atmosphere is different so you receive questions that are never asked in korea. they don’t disclose the questions in advance either. we were also worried because the emcee could ad-lib. we came up with the most probable questions and practiced, we also received lessons from american comedians. compared to that, we went on jimmy kimmel live without any prep. 12. what went according to plan and what didn’t? the questions were not as intense as expected, ellen was well aware about k-pop culture so it went smoothly. 13. is there a dance genre you’re into these days? contemporary, lyrical hiphop, in the future as superm i think i’ll be able to show more, not the kind of dancing that you do after learning a given choreography but the kind that is full of emotions. it’s about giving meaning to your gestures. it isn’t out yet but my concert vcr features lyrical hiphop. in it i think i’m dancing alone with a giant full moon as my backdrop but get confused when there are two of us, either it’s another person or a shadow. a choreographer with a body type similar to mine had to dress in all black to come across as my shadow. i wore an oriental outfit with smokey makeup. 14. how do you usually come up with your ideas? i get inspired by the choreographers and creative directors. i imagine it as we converse then the idea develops. 15. was there a time you were inspired by fashion? of course. art begins with the five senses. what you see with your eyes, the things you can feel, clothes, food, perfume, music that you listen to are all sources of inspiration. i create private accounts to follow fashion brands. 16. having debuted at the age of 16, you are still young but your work experience has been long. i was in certain situations because of this. it doesn’t happen as often now but even in my early 20s, i completely belonged to the senior category at broadcasting stations. they are my juniors but many of them are also hyungs, i’m their senior but i’m also the youngest. now there are even staff members who are younger than me. they’re too formal with me (laughs). 17. are there juniors that ask you for advice or help? the superm members! especially ten, he is very curious. when we come out of a company meeting, he’ll get surprised and say “wow, hyung everything you said was right.” i even hear things like ‘veteran’ and ‘seer.’ apparently my predictions come true. but i try not to advise them as much. taking the initiative to say something feels overwhelming. 18. born in 1993 between millennials and gen z, do you share any characteristics with those in your age bracket? we’ve picked out a few of their traits. the first one is ‘they don’t eat fast food.’ me too! i took care of my health well ever since i started out with shinee. i was brainwashed from home to avoid foods that harmed the body. not even ramyeon, snacks were also banned. and just like that in my 20s i started carrying out the regime on my own. it’s become a habit to look after my health ever since i moved out. i always eat things that are good for my body, if the hyungs are taking vitamins, i’d ask for one too. 19. i suddenly recall a variety show where you were the only one who skipped the sauce and ate the meat on its own! one should not eat irritable foods. my mother’s words. 20. how about ‘they watch videos on youtube rather than tv. even the ads don’t particularly bother them.’ that’s right. i watch youtube more often than tv, while watching the ads i'd even marvel at their production quality. i’ve signed up for the premium package now so i don’t see the ads anymore. 21. ‘marrying or wanting to buy their own house.’ i currently live alone and i have no interest in decking out my house. at first, i didn’t think like that but a month later my interest dissipated. i’m lazy. it’s not like my house is for others to see, i’m fine with the incomplete feeling for now. 22. and finally ‘they avoid investing in financial companies.’ i don’t do that. my parents manage that, if there’s a good tip i’ll just let them know.  23. hiphop musicians tend to express their success through music. as an idol musician how have you been using the wealth you accumulated all these years? i invest in food instead of saving up (laughs). honestly, i don’t spend much. i don’t have anything i want. though i do spend on others a lot. 24. what kind of household did you grow up in? what gifts did you inherit from your family as a musician? i inherited my body type. all of my cousins have model-like physiques, they’re taller and slimmer than me. my mother sings well. my father plays instruments as a hobby. oh, and my paternal aunt used to be a ballerina. so perhaps i inherited such genes? 25. you’ve been doing the same thing for more than 10 years. what is the purpose behind creating music and showcasing it? in the past, i would think i should do well, i need to be number one, these days i’ve become ambitious for other aspects. i take pride in the fact that my work supplies others with positive energy. i feel a sense of accomplishment when fans like my music, i want to make them as happy as i am. everyone’s profession is different but i hope this synergy gained from mutual dependence leaves a good impression. 26. are you still composing songs? i used to but now i only participate in lyric writing. it differs with each song, at times the lyrics are emotional or talk about abstract love. it seems like my next solo album will include a song i wrote the lyrics to. sometimes songs composed by overseas composers might prove too difficult for the general public to understand. so i participate a lot in the arrangement or mixing phase. i point out the parts that should be added to the composition and those that are unneeded. teacher lee soo man does give advice but it often feels like i do the producing of my own solo album. 27. taemin’s originality is the clearest when he promotes as a solo artist. which song has best represented your identity? i worked hard on all of them but there was a turning point. at first there was ‘danger’ then ‘press your number’ was a conceptual performance, the transition to ‘move’ turned out well. i wanted to break out from the typical choreography routine and create my own identity, the resulting performances were ‘move’ and ‘want.’ my next solo album is again different. i’ve been making a lot of changes these days. 28. you seem to have high standards when it comes to composing music. was there ever an occasion where you absolutely refused to compromise and gave others a hard time? everyone is used to it (laughs). it’s something i learned from the head manager hyung who’s been with me since debut. the belief that ‘there is nothing that can’t be done. there is no such thing as impossible.’ another team manager hyung would tell me ‘you remind me of our head’ (laughs). honestly, the staff around me work beyond their given roles and with affection. normally work timings are from 9 to 7, they stay back till 10-11 pm for me. they don’t hold it against me, and when things do well, they too feel a sense of fulfillment together with me. 29. the new unreleased song must be quite different from the original then.  there are already 12 versions of the song. when i thought we were somewhat done, we recently started arranging it again (laughs). 30. you hold your body to specific standards for the best performance outcome. i don’t ‘bulk up.’ previously, i used to work out when i ate a lot but my body would feel weighed down, it wasn’t what i wanted. if i gain a lot of muscles or become thick, it hampers my dancing form. that’s why i don’t put on weight. i train my stamina and strength and avoid bulking up my shoulders and arms. 31. by the way, do you do neck exercises as well? i was touched looking at your long neck in the vogue photoshoot. i had been noticing this too, now i know the reason! i think it’s because i dance. a lot of resistance goes into the neck when you dance. our head is the heaviest and it’s the neck that supports it. it goes away when i rest for a few days. we’re shooting amidst the superm tour maybe that’s why it looks thicker now.  32. an editor who has been watching you closely for a long time said that you’ve become extroverted. could it be that experience and relationships have made you comfortable and secure? i’ve lowered my guard. i couldn’t reveal my current self to others before. as a child i used to be so introverted that i’d hide behind my mother when strangers would get into the elevator. i changed with time.  33. is your ever-present smile a product of your personality or just business decorum? i’m always smiling. i even laugh at things other people don’t find funny (laughs). 34. shinee members are currently serving in the army. when they’re on break what kind of advice or nagging do they subject you to? i wish they would do that. we have a group chat on kakaotalk and i always revive it by asking “what’s up” “happy new year.” but as soon as the conversation picks up they only talk about the army. when i inform them about an issue at the company they say “really?” then it’s military talk again. when i feel left out and tell them to stop, they reply with “you’ll understand when you get here.” 35. in your career as a musician, when do you feel the best? when it’s time to reveal all that i’ve been preparing for so long! it feels different from finishing it. the first stage after debuting, shinee’s first concert, performing at tokyo dome, receiving the award... these are the moments that come to mind. 36. watching taemin grow for the past decade has been a huge source of strength. what are your dreams now? there are many. first of all, once shinee comes back again, i want the entire group to give off a feeling of revival. usually after getting discharged, it’s hard to keep up with the next generation, i want to avoid that. i’ve imagined it all when the shinee members return. second, i want to perform a lot on various stages as a solo artist. superm topped the billboard 200 album chart, it’d be nice to enter the top 10 on the hot 100 digital chart as well.  37. you are really talented at setting goals. i’ve gotten greedier. it’s just not for myself but i want to do it for the fans and members, even the staff. they become my driving force. i really am lucky. everybody works hard but i even get the recognition for it. come to think of it, i was given many opportunities and i worked hard to make the most of them, i’m really happy my efforts paid off in the end. i’m surrounded by good people. shinee, superm, many people fill in the gaps for me that i can’t solve on my own. 38. superm’s concert title is ‘we are the future.’ when you hear the word ‘future’ what are you reminded of? first, it’s h.o.t. (laughs). future-oriented things come to mind like artificial intelligence, drones, 3d hologram concerts. then again, in the future, though people might be able to watch concerts through holograms, i think humans will not give up on the tasks they themselves can do. my work will still be the same in the future. 39. the reason you don’t write anything on instagram. i don’t have anything to say yet (laughs). i don’t know if i should make my instagram cool or approachable. when fretting between writing a caption or using an emoticon, i just end up leaving it blank. actually i signed up after my manager hyung suggested that instagram would be good. so i’ve made one but i still don’t know what to upload. i get teased by the people around me for putting up selfies. i even took lots of pictures especially for instagram but... 40. did you not post the pictures? the point of instagram is real-time communication. is that so! i didn’t know (laughs).

translated by romanceboys — take out with full credit (source)

[daymansbingerecapsandrankings]

(Originally written on October 8, 2020)

🎵Bang, Bang Bangedy Bang

I said a Bang Bang Bangedy Bang🎵

My How I Met Your Mother Thoughts

I just spent the last nine seasons in New York with the gang that spends all their time in MacLaren’s Pub. SELF FIVE! I have to say, this binge of How I Met Your Mother brought me so much happiness. I started watching this show for the first time back in high school, and I ended up watching the last six seasons as they aired. I remember loving this group of characters, and now I am reminded why. There’s so much chemistry between the five, and it makes for one of my favorite Comedies/Sitcoms of all time. If you’ve read any of my previous Show Thoughts, then you know I’ve been watching several over the course of this lovely Pandemic That Will Just Keep Going. After this rewatch, I’ve decided HIMYM is my third favorite Comedy/Sitcom, right after Boy Meets World and Scrubs.

Now, I know that the Finale is infamous. It’s in the Mount Rushmore of Terrible Endings, and people end up getting a sour taste in their mouth when they bring up the show. Well, it’s been some years. There’s been time to reflect and look back. And, while I’m not in favor of the Finale, I also don’t hate it anymore with the passion of a thousand suns. I just loved watching and growing with the gang, seeing them experience their highs and their lows, their triumphs and their failures. It just hits harder as an adult, like most of these shows assuredly do, and I cherish so many of these episodes and moments.

And now, my rankings for the seasons!

Seasons Rankings

1. Season One

2. Season Four

3. Season Two

4. Season Six

5. Season Eight

6. Season Five

7. Season Three

8. Season Seven

9. Season Nine

My rankings for the girlfriends, purely on how much I like them as a character

The Girlfriends Rankings

1. Robin

2. Tracy

3. Victoria

4. Zoey

5. Stella

6. Jeannette

And now, a ranking of my favorite episodes. From 1-50, these are the ones that stand out above the rest. I consider every single one of these enjoyable.

Favorite Episodes

1. Slap Bet (S2E9)

2. Come On (S1E22)

3. The Limo (S1E11)

4. The Best Burger in New York (S4E2)

5. Ten Sessions (S3E13)

6. The Pineapple Incident (S1E10)

7. Bachelor Party (S2E19)

8. Game Night (S1E15)

9. Oh, Honey (S6E15)

10. Glitter (S6E9)

11. The Duel (S1E8)

12. The Pilot (S1E1)

13. Arriverdverci, Fierro (S2E17)

14. The Over-Correction (S8E10)

15. How Your Mother Met Me (S916)

16. Intervention (S4E4)

17. The Magician’s Code, Part II (S7E24)

18. The Autumn of Break-Ups (S8E5)

19. The Ducky Tie (S7E3)

20. The Best Man (S7E1)

21. The Leap (S4E24)

22. Blitzgiving (S6E10)

23. Three Days of Snow (S4E13)

24. The Scorpion & The Toad (S2E2)

25. Bass Player Wanted (S9E13)

26. The Final Page, Part 2 (S8E12)

27. Duel Citizenship (S5E5)

28. Happily Ever After (S4E6)

29. Farhampton (S8E1)

30. Bro Mitzvah (S8E22)

31. Robin 101 (S5E3)

32. The Magician’s Code, Part I (S7E23)

33. Last Words (S6E14)

34. The Playbook (S5E8)

35. The Time Travelers (S8E20)

36. Splitsville (S8E6)

37. Subway Wars (S6E4)

38. Showdown (S2E20)

39. Drumroll, Please (S1E13)

40. Front Porch (S4E17)

41. Twin Bed (S5E21)

42. Who Wants to be a Godparent? (S8E4)

43. Girls vs. Suits (S5E12)

44. Something Borrowed (S2E21)

45. As Fast As She Can (S4E23)

46. The Wedding Bride (S5E23)

47. The Bracket (S3E14)

48. The Sexless Innkeeper (S5E4)

49. Third Wheel (S3E3)

50. Spoiler Alert (S3E8)

And now, just some thoughts on the show and on the gang!

Ted - I know people don’t like Ted. I don’t actually like Ted all that much. And yet, I found myself rooting for Ted just like I did the first go around. He’s not the worst person in the world, and I would be scared to see half of the decisions we’ve made in the dating game stringed together into a TV show. I know people wouldn’t like me very much for those decisions. Then again, I also don’t get super crazy about details about buildings, I don’t pronounce encyclopedia that way, and he tends to stick his foot in his mouth with this White Man confidence that I just don’t have. With all that being said, I still find Ted being a great friend, a man who is just trying to find the love of his life, and someone who really drives this story with great tales and narration (Bob Saget is the Sixth Man of the Show for just always bringing it). I think Ted does stupid things and he pretty much admits it after the fact. He learns, sometimes, and also doesn’t much like most of us. When he finally found the Mother, when he finally found Tracy, I cared. I cared so much, and I still do. Even though they just shit on her character and don’t give us enough time with her, I almost wonder if that’s a metaphor for the fact that you won’t always have enough time with your loved ones.

Robin - Let’s go to the mall! Yeah! Robin Sparkles is a Canadian Treasure, and so is Robin Scherbatsky. She is one of the best things about this show, and I love her so. Played by Cobie Smulders who I need to see in more stuff, Robin is who we all wanted Ted to maybe be with first. Then we go through all the loops of the HIMYM roller coaster, and a lot of us still wanted them to be together. I was one of them. Yet, she was more than just a romantic plot line for Ted. She was a part of the group who we got to see join it and evolve into a member of their family organically. Robin is fun, loud, full of fun quirks that we get to learn over the course of the series. I was heartbroken when we found out she can’t have children. I was loving the back and forth between her and Barney (the first time), and kind of mad at Barney about being such a crazy ass prankster the second time. Robin shows us just how amazing some gun loving, hockey obsessed Canadian news anchor can be, and how much she cares for her friends.

Lily - Justice Aldrin ends up being one of my favorite characters, even if that gets some curious looks. Yeah, she left Marshall for a summer. Yeah, she had some hesitancy with the marriage and everything. That happens. Lily was also always there for her friends, even if she ends up going a little overboard. She wants Ted to find happiness, and does whatever she can to help. She is there to listen to Robin at all times, and her and Marshall are easily one of the best relationships in TV I’ve ever witnessed. Then we have Lily and Barney which is honestly super underrated. Barney trusts Lily, even though she can’t keep a secret, with all of his emotional problems. Lily is who thought Barney could change before anyone else, and I love seeing their friendship grow from eye rolls to eye tears.

Barney - Oh, Barney. He honestly brings so much annoyance and fun to the show. He’s the friend of the gang who everyone tolerates. He’s the one in the gang who everyone ends up loving just as much as everyone else. Barney shows such a terrible face to the world, sleeping with over 250 women and lying to most of them. He has all these rules that aren’t very ethical. He gives us most of the Misogynism in this show, which is definitely prevalent and makes the show not as strong as it was in the first watch. Still, we get to see Barney grow into someone who wants real love and a happy life. Sure, they show us that his marriage to Robin only lasts three years, but at least they tried. Barney just couldn’t make it work, and that’s honestly who Barney really is. A person who just enjoys sleeping with different people. I was very warmed to see the baby reveal and that Barney becoming a dad was what would change him more than anything. Barney is an underrated friend, and his importance to the gang is legendary.

Marshall - I. Love. Big Fudge. He’s just so fun, caring, goofy, loyal, and everything that I aspire to be in life. For some reason, when watching the show the first time, I related to Ted the most. I was definitely a bit more selfish then. But now, I see that I am a Marshall. He wants to do good in the world, and it drives him so much. He only loves Lily, and his loyalty to their relationship is just Goals. He is also the most fun to watch having a crisis. He gets the big eyes and covers his mouth and just gets obviously super uncomfortable. Some of my favorite moments of the show are also Marshall’s talks with Ted about his feelings for Robin. Any one-on-ones with Marshall and someone else are probably my favorite moments. And yes, I will always root for him over those damn machines!

Last Thoughts:

Sure, the writing wasn’t as sharp or as witty in the later seasons, but I loved the story lines and seeing the gang just live.

Tracy was an amazing character as The Mother, and I truly wonder what could have been if they had given us two full seasons of story with her instead of any episodes of Jeannette.

I really can’t believe Ted told his kids all those stories. A fun premise for a show, but really, not very realistic telling them all that jazz.

Ranjit and Carl are such fun recurring characters that I always enjoyed seeing every time they popped up.

Out of all the recurring jokes and gags, which there are many (y’all said Community has so many, but HIMYM really swings for it), I love the Major/General salute joke. Idk if I just didn’t care for it the first time around or forgot about it, but I just love how silly it is and how they kept it through to the very last episode.

Watching the gang sit at their table in MacLaren’s just hanging out will always make me smile.

[threelittlerats]

so, i have this one friend. we met through our parents and apart from one week each year, we hardly ever see each other. the older i get, the more i realise being around him feels like sitting by the fireplace after being out in the cold for too long. so this is an appreciation post for him.

i used to be super fond of him because out of this friend group we're a part of, us two have always been the smart kids. i'm talking proper school, both educated in a foreign language and straight a students. i was into our other friend for a long time and while we were on and off, he was always there. we clicked a bit later, when he, too, realised we're the *smart kids*.

this one summer, when the whole kids squad grew a bit (i think we could've been like 14), they said we talk and act like we're the parents of the group, and so we were pronounced a married couple. i think it was about that time i realised he feels like a warm rug in front of a fireplace.

because you see, he used to be the proper gentleman. opening doors and always being polite and liking to chat, and i liked that about him. but as he got older, he discovered that being a little bitch is actually fun and so he started to get a raise out of almost everyone. that's why it felt even more special he was nice to me sometimes.

i specifically remember that that summer, we both treasured the moments we could talk alone, since everyone else was completely nuts and they all kept doing really weird things. talking to him was a break from that mayhem for both of us. so when i left a bit early that year, just about every kid from that friend group dm'd me a picture of him kind of sad saying he misses his wife. 

it's a little hard to be around him sometimes, especially since i'm very sensitive to other people's comments and he's one to sarcastically poison just about every word coming out of his mouth. all of them are worth it when he's in a goofy mood and acts as if we were actually married tho. 

a year later, i developed a massive crush on him, because truth be told, i never really met that many smart dudes and i've had my fair share dating stupid guys. he is very passionate about photography and that year, he took a bunch of pictures of me and my brother and i love those pictures to death. i tried texting him during the summer after we left and at the beginning of the year, but it never worked out and i got a little sour about it. i hoped there was something between us and it made me upset when i realised there is not, but it wasn't until this year i realised what went wrong. 

this year, he is 18. he finished high school and is leaving to study in switzerland. i always knew he could do it but i felt very proud when he told me. we've grown quite a lot and this year, we got to chat a lot with other kids too, and they were all meaningful conversations. apart from getting to know him a little better and realising that i love him so dearly as a friend, i felt that being around him gives me so much effortlessly gained serotonin. i think it's the way he's passionate about things in life the way i think i never was - he isn't an overthinker or stresser, he just takes things as they are. 

he mentioned this one night he hates texting. the idea of texting someone for the sole purpose of just talking to them is very foreign to him. when asked what does he do when he misses someone, he said he thinks about them and the times they had together, and continues doing what he was doing before. knowing that, i won't be bothering him with texting, since he hates it. but i do miss him a lot. 

my solution? this year, since he'd be on the other side of europe, every time i miss him, i will send a message saying this: 'hi! you don't have to answer, but i wanted to tell you i've been thinking about you/i miss you/... hope you're doing fine'. i guess i'll update you on how that goes? 

[prettyinlimegreenboots]

Hey there! Could you do stargazing and proposal for sprace? If you would rather someone else that's great too! Have the best day! I might send in another prompt later. <3

I’ve been throwing around an idea of how Spot proposed to Race in my Life in the Emergency series. @deliciouspeachpirate gave me the perfect opportunity to write it. So buckle up kids, this is a doozy. 

One point of noting, as I was writing this, I realized that Katherine would’ve had to be in school for 12 years, which would’ve made her at least 30 in this series. I’m envisioning the group to be mid-20s, 25/26 years old. However, she’s actually a PA, not an MD. I’ve made the updates in the other stories of the series. 

I do not own One Tree Hill. Curse words and alcohol included.

July 18, 2019 7:30pm

There were perks to working nights while his boyfriend was puttering around the house, unaware of what was to come that night. But little did Race know that Spot was only working until 8pm, having switched with a fellow nurse for the night. 

Tapping on the desk caught his attention as Spot looked over at Albert. “You nervous? Ready for this?” 

“Why I told you in the first place, I’ll never know.” Spot shook his head, looking at his boyfriend’s best friend. “I’m a little nervous.”

Albert smiled, putting a hand on Spot’s shoulder. “Don’t be . . . my best friend may be a dumbass but he’s going to be surprised. He’ll love it.” 

“You sure?” Spot bit his lip, his eyes flying up to see Kat throwing a chart on the desk. 

She rolled her eyes, looking at her friend. “Spot we’ve been over this a thousand times. You could propose to him doing the hula and he would say yes. This is perfect for you two and he’s going to love it. Now don’t you have places to be, other than the Emergency Room?” 

Spot rolled his eyes at Plums and Albert before quickly clocking out and pushing back the chair. “Wish me luck.”

“Good luck but you won’t need it.” Kat pulled him into a hug before lightly slugging his shoulder. “Text me later, might need some excitement to keep me awake.” 

Nodding, he said goodbye to them both, stopping by his locker before he walked to his SUV, his baby outside of Race. Throwing his bag in the backseat, he quickly checked the trunk, making sure the cooler he packed earlier was still cold. He saw the blankets there as well before shutting the trunk lid. 

Jumping into the SUV, he turned the radio on and let his thoughts drift over the last six years he and Race had been dating. They had been friends throughout high school but didn’t start dating until their sophomore year of college, when they were roommates. Spot grinned, remembering their wild times at 1456 Wakeman Ave. Jack and Crutchie had lived across the hall with Albert and Romeo just down the hall. 

Pulling into the driveway, he quickly grabbed his bag before walking into the house. Dropping his bag on the bench in the mudroom, he smirked, hearing the bass pumping as there was noise coming from the kitchen. Peeking his head into the kitchen, Spot’s eyebrow raised. “Racer, what the hell are you doing?” 

His head snapped up, hitting the underside of the cupboard, several curse words escaping his mouth. “Spottie? What the hell are you doing home? You scared the living shit outta me.” 

“Sorry about that. But this is your first surprise of the night.” Spot leaned over, rubbing the back of Race’s head as he kissed him. “I’m sorry for scaring you.” 

Race gave him a look. “Again, what the hell are you doing home? Thought you were working overnight.”

“That’s what I had you believe. I actually got off at 8 . . . now go get changed into comfy clothes and we’ll get going.”  Spot clapped his head, heading to their bedroom to change. 

Spot quickly got changed into an old pair of basketball shorts and a t-shirt before grabbing something from the top drawer, heading out to the living room, where Racer still hadn’t moved. “Racer, let’s go.”

“Where are we going?” Race asked, tilting his head to look at Spot. 

Shrugging, Spot smiled. “Figured since I don’t have to work tonight, we’d go for a drive. Go get changed.”

“That’s what you’re wearing?” Race asked as he headed for the bedroom.

Spot rolled his eyes. “Nah, I figured I’d change along the way.”

“Alright, smartass, you don’t have to break out the sarcasm.” Race called, as Spot went around the living room, turning off the many lights that were on. He yelled at Alexa to stop playing the music. Slipping his feet into a pair of Nike Flip Flops, he grabbed the keys as Race came out of the bedroom. “Alright I’m ready . . . do I need to bring anything?”

“Unless you want a hoodie or something specific to drink, everything is already in the car.” Spot said, twirling the keys in his hand. 

Race gave him a curious look, heading back to the bedroom, grabbing a hoodie for them both before meeting Spot in the entryway, heading out to the car. Unlocking the navy blue 4Runner, he quickly got into the driver’s side as Race hopped in on the passenger’s side. “So do I get a hint or anything? Still can’t believe you tricked me on when you worked.” 

“I haven’t surprised you in a while, figured it would be a good night to do it.” Spot grinned, leaning over stealing a kiss from him. “As for a hint, it’s something you’ve been wanting to do this summer but we haven’t been able to do it yet.” 

Every summer they make a bucket list on their chalkboard wall in the kitchen. Everything from visiting the beach to a summer roadtrip to getting ice cream from their favorite local shop, there are 14 things up on their wall that they’ve been checking off since Race got out of school for the summer. “There’s so many things still up on the board that we haven’t accomplished yet.” 

“Well we’ve got a bit of drive ahead of us so you can ponder the board for a while.” Spot smirked, pulling out of the driveway. “Do you want to pick a playlist?” 

Race shrugged, hooking his phone up to the system before the Lumineers poured out of the system. “So were you working this morning?” 

“Nah, I had some errands to run. I worked 2-8 but I have to pick up a shift in the next two weeks for Maria who is covering for me tonight.” Spot held his hand out for Race to lace his fingers through, giving them a squeeze. “All will be revealed soon but I just wanted to surprise you tonight. I put in a request to transfer to days.” 

Race’s eyes went wide as a grin slid across his face. “You did? But you love nights.” 

“But I hate not being able to spend much time with you.” Spot countered, taking his eyes off the road for a second. “Kat and Albert are also looking to transfer to days so the gang will all be together.” 

Race nodded. “Jack told me that he and Kat are trying to get pregnant . . . that might be why.” 

“That’d make sense.” Spot nodded, squeezing Race’s hand, sighing happily. “I love you, Racer.”

“Love you too Spot; even when you scare me shitless.” Race chuckled as Spot joined in. 

Spot turned onto the interstate, accelerating the car as he merged on. “So we’re heading out of the city?” 

“Yes, we are.” Spot agreed, giving him a look. “Any ideas?” 

Race shook his head. “Nah but I can check a few off the list due to going out of the city.” 

“Is this one of your random playlist?” Spot questioned, listening to the music fade from “This I Promise You” by NSYNC to “I Won’t Say (I’m In Love)” from Hercules.

Race picked up the phone and looked at it, shrugging. “I just picked one of the Spotify playlist. I can put something else on, if you want.”

“Nah this is good . . . just didn’t expect to go from NSYNC to Disney.” Spot chuckled, picking up their linked hands and pressing a kiss to the back of Race’s hand.  “How’s driver’s training going?”

Groaning, Race threw his head back. “Almost got into a wreck with two kids today. Luckily at the last minute they stopped but my heart was in my chest for the rest of the drive. Needless to say, they’re driving with another instructor for the rest of the week.”

“How close are we talking about? Darting out in front of another car or blowing a red light?” Spot asked, raising an eyebrow as he squeezed Race’s hand. 

Race sighed. “Darting out in front of a car, one side was clear but failed to see a car coming until it was almost too late. All I kept thinking is thank goodness you’re working today.” 

“I love you dearly but it’s never a good day when you end up in my Emergency Room.” Spot gave him a knowing look. 

Race half smiled. “I know but you look so damn sexy in those scrubs.” 

“I honestly have no words.” Spot said slowly as Race threw his head back and laughed loudly - one of Spot’s favorite sounds in the world. 

Spot grinned pulling off the interstate, applying the brake as they came up to a stop sign. Turning left, Spot saw Race’s face break into a big grin as he slowly recognized where they were. “You’re taking me to the old farmhouse?” 

“Maybe . . .” Spot shrugged as the playlist flipped over to “I Don’t Want To Be” by Gavin DeGraw. “Remember when you made me watch all 9 seasons of One Tree Hill over a two week period?” 

Race chuckled. “I thought you were going to kill me but you ended up loving that show as much as I do. Besides, I don’t think I’ve seen anyone ship Naley as much as you do.” 

“Leave my precious babies alone.” Spot took his hand off the steering wheel for a moment to point his index finger in Race’s direction. “They had their ups and downs but damn they were the couple that made that show!” 

Race rolled his eyes as Spot turned into the long driveway of the farmhouse Medda had bought several years ago as a retreat outside of the city. “Momma here?” 

“Nah, she’s in the city working on some new production.” Spot said, giving his boyfriend a grin. “She knows we’re out here though.” 

“Just in case there’s a stray killer scarecrow hunting the grounds?” Race quipped, giving Spot a look. 

Shrugging, he stopped the car, turning off the engine. “You never know what can happen in Timbuktu. Come on.” 

Hopping out of the SUV, Spot made his way to the trunk to grab the blankets, handing them to Race before grabbing the cooler. Closing the hatch, he offered Race his hand before leading him out to the fields behind the house. “What are we doing? You didn’t bring me here to die, did you?” 

Spot threw his head back laughing. “No one is going to die tonight . . . well that’s not in the plans.” 

“That’s reassuring.” Race mumbled, lacing his fingers with Spot’s. “What’s in the cooler?” 

Spot adjusted the cooler in his other hand as he tugged on the one laced with Race’s hand. “If you hurry up, I can show you. The more questions you ask, the longer until everything is revealed.” 

“Okay, okay.” Race motioned Spot to start walking as he followed behind him. “You sure there’s no cow pies out here?” 

Sighing loudly, Spot shook his head. “Momma doesn’t own any cows, for as long as I’ve known you. Do you think the cow pies would magically fall from the sky?” 

“I mean, you never know. There are cows around here that could’ve gotten loose.” Race defended as Spot looked over his shoulder at him. 

“In your dreams, Racetrack. Now pick up your pace. It’ll be midnight by the time we get everything set up at this pace.” Spot cracked a smile at him before looking up at the sky, knowing the night was perfect. 

Soon they came to the field that they had often found themselves laying in when they were at the farmhouse. It was a little tradition of theirs. “Here.” 

Dropping the blankets on the ground, Race sighed looking over at Spot. “Okay . . . now what?” 

“Oh how I love you Race.” Spot leaned over, stealing a kiss from him. “Please never change.”

Race’s eyes went wide as he looked at Spot. “What does that mean?” 

“You haven’t figured out what we’re doing yet?” Spot asked, putting the cooler on the ground before spreading out one of the blankets on the ground. 

As if something had hit him, Race’s eyes brightened up. “We are going to stargaze?”

“Bingo, snookums.” Spot said, dropping to his knees on the blanket before rolling over onto his back, propping an arm behind his head. “It’s the perfect night for it. Look at how clear the sky is.” 

Race soon joined him, laying his head on Spot’s chest as he gazed up at the stars, sighing in contentment.  “The big dipper is on bright display tonight.”

“Of course that’s the one that you always find first.” Spot grinned, running a hand through Race’s hair. “And there’s the little dipper and the North Star.” 

Race hummed in agreement as he tilted his head back to look at the star filled sky. “It’s absolutely gorgeous out here. Why do we live in the city again?”

“Closer to jobs, family, everything really.” Spot replied. “Maybe in the next few years, we can move out here. It’s not that far of a drive when you really think about it.” 

Race nodded against Spot’s chest. “Might be hell in the winter but we can always get a better car.” 

“It’s good to dream with you.” Spot mused continuing to run his hand through Race’s hair. “I’ve been doing some thinking.” 

Race sat up, giving Spot a look. “Is that good thinking or bad thinking?” 

“Always good thinking.” Spot said, sitting up, lacing his fingers with Race’s, squeezing them gently.  “How long have we been together, Racer?” 

A smile crossed Race’s face. “We’ve known each other since Freshman year in high school, god we were babies. But together officially since Sophomore year of college. I remember being so nervous to tell you that I liked you . . . it was a damn miracle that you hung out with me as a friend, let alone a boyfriend.” 

Spot laugh, nodding his head. “The feeling was mutual snookums. I couldn’t get over how lucky I was to have you in my life as a friend, let alone a boyfriend. I remember pinching myself so many times during the first month because I thought this was going to crumble and fall. You’ve been there for every good day, through all the triumphs and downfalls. You’re the first person I want to call when I’ve got good news, the person I want to hug when the day is just awful, and the person I want to vent all my frustrations to. But we’ve been through so much together and our journey is just beginning. Since we’ve been together for six years, I kinda don’t want to spend the rest of my life with anyone else . . . so, Antonio James Higgins, will you do the honor and marry me? Be tied to me for ever and ever?” 

Race’s jaw dropped, tears glistening in his eyes, as he started nodding his head before throwing his body weight at Spot, knocking him onto his back. He placed his hands on either side of Spot’s head before leaning down and kissing him. “Ja, Sí, Si, Oui, Yes, Sean Thomas Conlon . . . You're an idiot but I absolutely love you and yes, I will marry you.” 

“I’m your idiot now.” Spot said, leaning up to capture his lips in another kiss. “And I love you too snookums.” 

Race hummed into the kiss, pressing forward slightly to deepen it. Moaning slightly, Race pulled back with a smirk on his face. “Someone’s a little eager.” 

“I’ve been carrying this around for a while now.” Spot sat up, pulling a velvet box out of his pocket, cracking it open. A black Tungsten ring with a row of black Sapphires sat inside the box. A gasp escaped Race’s mouth as he looked at the ring before looking up at Spot. “I-Is that for me?” 

“Nope, it’s for the cow that’s in the next pasture.” Spot grinned, shaking his head as Race smacked his shoulder. “Of course it’s for you idiot. Now, can I put it on your hand without a comment from the peanut gallery?” 

Holding out his left hand, Race grinned at Spot. Race’s hand shook slightly as Spot pushed the ring onto his ring finger. “I promise you that I will always be there on the tough days, the good days, and the bad days. You will never walk alone as I will always be by your side. And I love you immensely.” 

Spot reached up and wiped away the stray tears from Race’s eyes before leaning up and pressing a kiss to his lips. “You’ve made me the happiest man alive, Tony.” 

“Ditto, Sean, ditto.” Race half laughed, half laughed leaning forward so that his head was rested on Spot’s chest. “I love you, Spottie. How long have you been planning this?” 

“Since a few days ago but I’ve had the ring since April.” Spot grinned. 

Race’s head flew up from its place on Spot’s chest as his eyes went wide. “Since April? Where was it hidden in the house?”

“Who’s said it was in the house?” Spot countered, grinning at Race’s jaw drop. “I’m not telling you where it was hiddened.” 

Pulling the cooler closer to his side, Spot opened the top, grabbing two red Solo Cups and the champagne bottle that was inside. He made quick work of popping the cork off the bottle of champagne, eliciting a whooo from Race before pouring some of the liquid into each cup.  Spot handed one to Race, clinking his cup with Race’s before taking a sip and making a face. Race busted up laughing, throwing his head back. “You should see your face right now.” 

“Ugh . . . why is this stuff so awful?” Spot spat out the drink, not even taking another sip.

Shrugging, Race took his own sip, and not a second later, spit it out in the field beside him before dumping the cup. “Please tell me that you brought something else.” 

Reaching back into the cooler, he grabbed two bottles of beer, pulling the tops off, offering one to Race before gently clinking the necks of the bottles together. “Much better, mi amor.” 

Stretching his legs out in front of him, Spot felt Race slide as he sat beside him, mimicking Spot’s position, laying his head on Spot’s shoulder. “This was more than I could’ve ever dreamed of, Spot. Thank you.” 

“You’re welcome.” Spot whispered. “Can I confess something to you?” 

Looking up at him, Race nodded. “I was nervous to ask you earlier but when I spoke from the heart, my nerves went away.” 

“Were you nervous I'd say no?” Race whispered. 

“Never. I was more nervous that you wouldn’t like what I was planning.” Spot explained.

Race laced his fingers with Spot’s. “Honestly, you could’ve been doing the Hula and I would’ve said yes.” 

Spot threw his head back, laughing, while tears streamed down his face. “You and Kat need to stop hanging out with one another.” 

“Kat knew?” Race asked, squeezing their conjoined hands. 

Spot nodded. “She did as did Albert. I threatened them both of bodily harm if either of them squealed. Eventually we need to take a photo so I can send it to them. I’m surprised my phone isn’t blowing up.” 

Just as he said that his phone dinged as a text came through. Spot groaned fishing his phone out of his back pocket and opened it, laughing at the photo that was texted to him. Race looked over at him, raising an eyebrow at his sudden laughter. “What?” 

Tilting the phone, Race laughed seeing Kat and Albert with their chins in the palm of their hands staring into the camera of the phone. “All Kat texted with the photo was well.” 

Race laughed. “So how do you want to play this?”

Holding their conjoined hands up, Spot quickly took a photo of it before sending it to Kat and Albert along with Jack, Medda, Crutchie, and Smalls. He locked his phone, throwing it on the blanket before sighing in contentment. “All of the important people just found out. My job is done.” 

“Leaving the story part up to me?” Race asked as Spot’s hand found the top of his head and started massaging it. 

Spot chuckled. “You’re going to love telling everyone that story. Might as well give you the floor.” 

“Ugh you’re so right.” Race said as he sat up. “As much as I don’t want to, should we get going?” 

Spot’s mouth slipped into a wide smile before shaking his head. “Nope, we’re staying out here tonight. Neither of us have to work tomorrow so no sense in driving back to the city when we’ll be out here over the weekend anyways.” 

“You think of everything, pooks!” Race said, leaning over and kissing him. “Planner by nature.”

 Spot snaked his arm behind Race’s head keeping him there, kissing him again. “Shall we move this party inside?” 

“Please do not quit your day job, Spottie.” Race laughed, standing up, pulling Spot to his feet before gathering the blankets and putting the stuff back in the cooler. They made quick work of cleaning everything up before making their way to the farmhouse. 

Walking inside, there was a light on in the kitchen. Dropping everything in the foyer, the two made their way to the kitchen and grinned seeing what Medda had left them. A cake along with two plates and two bottles of chilled beer were sitting in the middle of the counter. The cake read “Congratulations Spot and Race!” in swirly font. Next to the cake was a handwritten note, which Race picked up and read aloud. 

Race and Spot, 

Congratulations on your engagement. Spot, I’m so happy you’ll be officially joining the family. We will be back around 4pm tomorrow. Race, your bedroom upstairs has fresh sheets on the bed already. There’s stuff for you in the fridge for breakfast and lunch tomorrow. 

Congratulations again and don’t make a mess! 

Love, 

Momma/Medda

Spot pointed to Race with a grin. “She knows you too well.  Shall we dig into this?”

“It’ll be a damn shame if we left the cake go to waste.” Race said grabbing two forks before just digging his fork into the cake and popping it into his mouth. “Damn, momma knows how to pick out a cake.” 

Spot dug his fork into the cake popping it into his mouth with a groan. “Medda is amazing and so is this cake.” 

Digging his fork in, Race looked over at Spot, offering him his fork as Spot leaned forward, eating the piece of cake. “Hey Spottie?” 

“Yeah Race?” Spot asked, swallowing the cake. 

Race set his fork down, leaning over and taking Spot’s hand in his, squeezing it. “You know how you said earlier that I made you the happiest man alive?” 

“I did and you do.” Spot squeezed his hand in return. “Something on your mind, Racer?” 

Race smiled. “You make me just as happy. Honestly, I was thinking of asking you to marry me, but as always you are three steps ahead of me. And I love you for it.” 

Spot leaned forward, one hand still clasped in Race’s hand and the other moving to cup Race’s cheek before directing his lips to meet his. “I love you Racer; always, forever, and from here to the moon and back.” 

“I love you too Spottie.” Race whispered, before leaning his forehead against Spot’s, pressing another kiss to his lips. 

Thank you @deliciouspeachpirate for sending in the prompt. This was a lot of fun to write and feedback would be most appreciated! 

[onestowatch]

Lowertown Is Growing Up [First Look + Q&A]

Photo: Shamshawan Scott

Olivia Osby and Avsha Weinberg always knew they wanted to make music. The difficult part came when the inevitable questions of how and with who would arise. At least that was the case until a chance encounter in a high school math class in suburban Atlanta, which would eventually serve as the birthplace for Lowertown. Now, a few odd years later Olivia and Avsha find themselves signed to Dirty Hit, home to the likes of The 1975 and beabadoobee, and aiming to make their most ambitious project to date.

“The Gaping Mouth,” a sprawling confessional that blends soft-spoken lyricism bordering on avant-garde poetry and experimental indie rock instrumentation, arrives as the first taste of that ambition. The titular single from their forthcoming EP, set to release September 16, feels like a daring call to arms, a single firework shot in the dark, impossible to ignore and indistinguishable. Most notably of all, it feels like a noted maturation for the duo, a step forward into new, uncharted territory.

On the new single, Osby ponders on the object of her affection, or rather attention, repeatedly uttering the lines “You are the iris in my eye” until they no longer seem to be coming from her, taking on the weight of a mantra spoken outside herself. It’s only one such instance of the duo’s newfound stream-of-conscious lyrical approach, which sees them ruminating on the fallacy of growing up and the associated fantasies that come with it. All of this is complemented by the duo’s fearless instrumentation and production flourishes, which call to mind everything from experimental ‘90s indie rock to the sonic detours that permeated Sufjan Steven’s early works. 

We had the chance to speak to Lowertown via e-mail about the difficulties of shifting from “teenagerdom” to adulthood, the advantages of having a french fry fork and their bold new musical direction.

You two originally met in a high school math class. How did the discussion of music first get brought up and how did it lead to forming Lowertown?

Avsha: Olivia was a new student at the school, and I was shy, so we had sat next to each other for some time before we really had any conversation. After some months, I would look at the music Olivia would listen to over her shoulder and make small excited comments or jokes. That’s how our friendship began, through comments about Olivia’s love of emo music or my insufferable judgment on some new music I had heard. It took a year for us to start thinking about doing music together. The eventual forming of Lowertown happened on a beach in Ottawa, where I was again making a judgment on some new song I had found and decided to show Olivia some of my demos. That was where we decided to work together. Those demos and others eventually formed our first record Friends

Were there ever any thoughts about pursuing music before that fateful meeting?

Olivia: I’d always hoped to be able to do music professionally, but it had always seemed like it was so far away from being possible. I always knew that even if my solo music did not work out as a career, I wanted to work in the music field. Whether that was becoming a manager for other musicians or becoming a booking agent, I knew for a long time I wanted to be surrounded by music no matter what I ended up doing.

A: I had spent almost my entire life hoping to be a musician. I started playing classical piano at age four, and up until two years ago, was planning on going to a conservatory and becoming a concert pianist. As my taste expanded, I taught myself guitar, drums, bass, and production, all with the hopes of continuing professionally. Growing up, I was exposed to many different artists and genres, and I always wanted to give people what the music that I grew up with gave to me. The demos that I had recorded in middle school were the ones I showed Olivia and the ones that led to us knowing that we had to start a band.

What was it like signing to Dirty Hit?

A: The process of signing was definitely a difficult one as we had begun talking with the label only a few months before COVID, and as we were narrowing down on the decision to sign, it became incredibly difficult to see a scenario where we would be able to meet anybody on the label. We ended up having many, many FaceTime and Zoom conversations, wherein we were able to talk in-depth with the team and get a good sense of the label. These conversations were really great, and it was a great signifier of the relationship to come as we have had a really great relationship with the label. Although the signing process was tumultuous, we were able to grasp that the relationship between Dirty Hit and their artists was a familial one, and that made us incredibly excited to work together.

If you could have one thing in the world at this very moment, what would it be?

O: A good night’s sleep. I have terrible insomnia and can’t remember the last time I had one.

A: A french fry fork. I’m pretty exhausted with how messy eating french fries is.

Has the past year affected how your approach music at all?

A: In the past, I knew that the more I worked, the better I became, but this year has shown me that the times that you choose to completely leave some things alone are just as important as the times that you focus all your energy on them. I was completely drained of inspiration and motivation until I was able to sit and do absolutely nothing. The lack of music helped me realize that there was a lot about myself that I wasn’t thinking about. I was able to learn more about myself and have new sources of inspiration and thought.

O: For sure. This year has given me an excessive amount of time to get better at playing music in general since I’ve been on my own so much. It has also given me too much time to sit and think by myself, which can be beneficial for music but also pretty detrimental at the same time. I’ve ended up feeling like my old sound and writing process was really stale, since I had been writing songs the same way for years. I’ve ended up experimenting a lot with new sounds and approaches to songwriting, which has been extremely refreshing and I feel like it’s brought out some of my best work. I used to put way less emphasis on instrumentation, but now that I’ve progressed a lot musically, I’ve written a lot of instrumentation that I’m very proud of and that has ended up developing into Lowertown work. I also learned a lot about production over this past year which has been extremely inspiring and helpful for my solo work.

How did you approach the songwriting on “The Gaping Mouth?” The lyricism and experimental instrumentation are honestly breathtaking.

A: When composing the instrumentals, I wanted to write a song that was very expressive and unique but that worked entirely on feeling rather than a traditional verse and chorus song. I wanted to write the piece with points that I knew the guitars would push Olivia’s voice to the forefront and points that raised the energy around Olivia’s words. Olivia’s lyrics are so personal, and she always has so much to say, so I wanted the whole song to ebb and flow together with the identical, and occasionally reciprocal, emotion and intimacy.

O: Avsha sent me this beautiful guitar piece one day and it immediately connected with me, and I stayed up all night working on it. I recorded a demo take of the vocals, just singing/talking over the song where it felt right and natural. That first take I took at home at four in the morning actually ended up being used in the final song because it felt so emotive and raw. The first vocal take had an unmatched authenticity that we couldn’t capture again in the studio no matter how many takes we tried. Our producer Catherine ended up falling in love with it as well and did not want to try to replicate something that was already amazing as it was.

There’s a real sense of maturation present not just in the delivery of the single but in the lyrics, “Being stupid and being 15 / Being older and think I know who I am and what I want… / The way I stay the same and I never change.” Is growing up or rather the idea of growing up a central theme to the music you’re currently working on?

O: I had just graduated high school when we were writing this new project, and I was feeling extremely anxious about the trajectory of my life. I kept thinking about if I was doing all that I should be doing at this age and how much had I really changed since the beginning of high school. I felt like a lot of mannerisms and detrimental ways of thinking that had plagued me when I was 14-15 were still incredibly present in my life, and it felt pathetic to think that I had not made much progress on some of my biggest shortcomings since I had first become a teenager. I feel like at 18/19, you’re not quite an adult, but you’re no longer just a teenager. You begin to shoulder real responsibility and have a lot of agency over your life. It’s quite terrifying being the one who has the power to make important personal decisions. If you screw up, it’s on you and no one else. The transition from high school where you have assignments to turn in every day and tests and a crazy amount of structure (you wake up and go to bed the same time every weekday) to making music and creating with a self-made schedule can be extremely jarring. I’m still grappling with that transition, as my workflow can sometimes trail into six in the morning which sometimes becomes a problem.

“The Gaping Mouth” is the eponymous single from your forthcoming EP. What can people expect from your new EP?

O: It’s gonna be leveled up from anything we’ve dropped before! This is our first project recorded in a studio setting as well as working in-person with a producer. We’ve matured since our last project as musicians and we’ve simply grown more into adults. A lot of this was written when we were 18 and when we’d just turned 19, and a lot of things happened at that point in our lives to write about. Our producer Catherine really helped push me to my full potential while working together. There are some louder songs mixed with some instrumentally dense and beautiful songs. There’s a good amount of experimentation as well in this project that I’m excited for everyone to hear.

A: We’ve focused so much on our songwriting and composition; I think people will be able to hear how we’ve matured. I think this EP reflects our need to always change our sound and grow it. It’s exciting because I think it’s really fresh and still has our musical roots sewn into the core.

And what’s one thing you hope people take away from this next stage of your music?

A: I hope people are able to see the world and the story that we want to create with our music. I hope people can see that our sound will always be maturing and that our music can be surprising and exciting.

O: I feel like our fan base has grown alongside us. Lowertown has been a project since we were 16 and it feels like it has already come so far, which is so amazing and I’m really thankful for everything that’s happened thus far. I hope our music can continue to authentically capture each stage of life Avsha and I live through while making music together. This record was written fresh after graduating high school, so I hope those who are grappling with the jarring transition from teenagerdom to adulthood can find some solace in the feelings expressed in this record.

What is your go-to fast food order?

O: We’re both pescatarian so sometimes finding easy fast food can be annoying. I’m a big burrito person so I’ll always get a bean burrito with a ton of veggies.

A: A universal choice for me in any fast food place would be an extra large order of fries, or however many is the most they offer, and a large Diet Coke. There were points during this year where every day of the week was punctuated with an absurd amount of McDonald’s fries and hot sauce.

Who are your Ones To Watch?

O: Pretty Sick , Horse Jumper of Love, N0v3l

A: Uboa, OOIOO, Donzii

[emy-loves-you]

Wrong Numbers and Useless Gays Chapter 6

Who the F*ck’s Rebecca? OR How the 3 Gays got Together

Virgil learns about Roman’s childhood, specifically his sister and how he ended up dating Patton and Logan.

Warning: Misgendering of a character (but no one knows that the character is trans)

Yes, Roman and Remus are brothers. Explanations are listed at the bottom

Chapter 5 | Masterlist | Chapter 7

V- (2:07 PM) Let it Go was the best song in Frozen and you cannot convince me otherwise

R- (2:07 PM) I respect your opinion, but hear me out: Love is an Open Door

V- (2:08 PM) No

R- (2:08 PM) What about Fixer Upper?

V- (2:09 PM) Still no.

P- (2:09 PM) I really liked Olaf’s song about Summer!

L- (2:10 PM) I personally enjoyed the reprise of First Time in Forever.

R- (2:10 PM) You like almost any song with a reprise

L- (2:10 PM)I will not argue that, as successfully executed reprises are “lit.”

R- (2:11 PM) Ah, and who among us could forget the absolute BOP that is… that weird ice-cutting song.

P- (2:11 PM) I don’t know, Roman. I think that song is, pretty COOL

R- (2:11 PM) Oh, lookout

V- (2:12 PM) What? He’s just saying it’s a CHILLED out groove.

R- (2:12 PM) Ugh

L- (2:12 PM) We might need you two to leave this chat if you don’t stop.

Virgil laughed, throwing his phone on the bed and stripping out of his clothes. He just finished jogging home from Janus’ (he didn’t own a car right now, preferring to walk or have Janus pick him up). It was a lazy afternoon in late September, and all Virgil wanted to do was get out of these sweaty clothes and maybe take a nap. He heard his phone go off multiple times as he got dressed, probably Patton and Logan arguing about the purpose of puns. He flopped down onto his bed and grabbed his phone, checking the new messages.

P- (2:14 PM) Lo, the Princes are calling.

L- (2:14 PM) Tell Roman not to answer, Patton. We’ve been over this.

P- (2:14 PM) They’re asking about us, Lo.

L- (2:14 PM) Tell Roman to hang up. They’re not worth it.

P- (2:15 PM) They’re yelling now, L. They brought up Rebecca. What do I do?

L- (2:15 PM) Just walk into another room, Patton. Ignore them. Do you want me to call you?

P- (2:15 PM) No, I’m good. Just keep texting me. I need a distraction.

Now, Virgil had no idea about what the fuck was going on. But he knew how to distract someone. He’d just have to trust them to tell him later.

V- (2:16 PM) Did you know that octopi have 3 hearts?

L- (2:16 PM) What

P- (2:16 PM) That just means they have more love to give!

V- (2:17 PM) The longest recorded flight of a chicken is 13 seconds

P- (2:17 PM) Such a good bird!

V- (2:17 PM) Babies do not regularly produce tears until they are 1-3 months old

L- (2:18 PM) Ah, I think I understand now

V- (2:18 PM) A ‘jiffy’ is an actual unit of time. It stands for 1/1000th of a second

L- (2:18 PM) Falsehood. A jiffy is 1/100th of a second

V- (2:19 PM) Sorry, my hand must’ve slipped.

L- (2:19 PM) You would be unable to walk on Jupiter, Saturn, Uranus or Neptune because they have no solid surface.

L- (2:20 PM) An asteroid about the size of a car enters Earth’s atmosphere roughly once a year. However, it burns up before it can reach us.

L- (2:20 PM) The highest mountain known to man is on an asteroid called Vesta. It is approximately three times the height of Mount Everest.

P- (2:21 PM) I think they hung up. Thanks for keeping me company, Kiddos!

L- (2:21 PM) It was not an issue, Patton.

V- (2:21 PM) Yeah, no problem Pat. Now can someone explain what just happened?

L- (2:23 PM) As you can probably tell, I am not home at the moment. Apparently, Roman’s parents decided to call him and an argument broke out. The rest is not my place to say.

Virgil bit his lip, refusing to look at his phone screen. Did Virgil have the right to ask about that. It was obviously a very sensitive topic, and Virgil had only known Roman for about 3 months now. Virgil felt like he knew a lot about his 3 crushes (their quirks, their favorite sweets, their goals in life), but he knew very little about their lives before Virgil had met them. Which was fine; they knew very little about Virgil’s life, too. But he desperately wanted to help Roman; to make him feel happy and safe and loved. Virgil sighed, setting his phone on his nightstand. If Princey wants to tell me what’s going on, I’ll listen. If not, I’ll just have to deal with it.

Virgil woke up from his nap to the sound of his phone going off. He blindly felt around for it, his face still firmly planted in his pillow. He finally found it, turning it on before he lifted his head to read the text. It was a private message from Princey.

R- (3:02 PM) You’re probably wondering what happened today.

V- (3:02 PM) I am, but you don’t have to tell me if you’re not comfortable. I’ll respect your privacy.

R- (3:02 PM) As much as I appreciate that, you still deserve to know.

R- (3:03 PM) Do you mind if I call you? This doesn’t feel like a conversation to have over text.

Virgil thought about it for a moment. He originally never wanted to call Roman, simply because he might recognize Virgil’s voice as Anxiety’s. However, not only was Virgil 99% confident that Roman had never even heard of The Dark Sides, Virgil’s head was still foggy after his nap. Before he knew it, he was already calling Princey’s phone.

“Virgil?” Roman didn’t sound as… grand as Virgil expected. His voice was subdued and slightly hoarse, probably from the screaming match with his parents.

“Heya, Princey.” Virgil cringed at how gravelly his voice sounded. He’ll need to get some water after this conversation is over.

“You sound so tired. Oh my stars, did I wake you up? I’m so sorry. I’ll let you get back to sleep-”

“Princey, it’s okay. Just finished my nap. Might not talk much, but ‘m all ears.”

“Alright. Where do I even begin?”

“Take your time. ‘m not pressurin’ you or anythin’.”

“(sigh) You’re right. I guess I should start at the beginning. I grew up in a very... conservative household. My parents expected me and my sister, Rebecca, to be perfect. ReeRee was my partner in crime. We did everything together up until highschool. My parents expected me to get a football scholarship and date the hottest girl in school. I did those things, not because I wanted to, but because they wanted me to. ReeRee was a different story. When my parents signed her up for cheerleading, she tried to join the football team instead. When they told her she should wear her hair in a ponytail, she cut it off to match mine. I didn’t understand, and it made me angry. It was like looking in a funhouse mirror; she was starting to look more and more like me, and yet each change made my parents angrier. Why was looking and acting like me a problem? I thought they liked this version of me! One night in the summer before junior year I was really frustrated and I took it out on her. I told her to stop acting like me. I knew she didn’t deserve my anger, so I went to Patton’s place to cool down. By the time I came home, my parents refused to acknowledge that I even had a sister. I pushed her away, and now I’ll never get her back.

After that, things changed. I was so angry, and everything I saw reminded me of her. I quit the football team, because every time I went down to the field I expected to see her. I dyed my hair, because every time I looked in the mirror I saw her staring back. I stopped caring about what my parents thought, ‘cause it was their opinions that dragged me into this mess!

I had already been friends with Patton since Freshman year, but me and Logan had been at each other’s throats . We were always bickering about something, and sometimes I used our arguments to vent out my anger at whatever was wrong at the time. I didn’t even realize how much I had cared about Patton and Logan until I learned about the LGBTQ+ community. My parents were super strict, and Patton and Logan didn’t exactly flaunt their relationship. I had no idea that liking guys was even an option . Once I learned about it, my parents quickly tried to shut it down. Everyday, they’d start their day telling me that ‘homosexuality is a sin’ and ‘God made you to be the gender you were born with!’ If they had told me that before ReeRee left, I might’ve believed them. But by this point, I didn’t care about a single thing they told me.

So one day, I’m arguing with Logan about who knows what, and suddenly we’re inches apart, and I remember pa saying ‘ a boy should never kiss another boy.’ And just think, ‘Fuck it.’ And now me and Pocket Protector are suddenly making out behind the school building. Microsoft Nerd asks why the hell I decided to make out with him of all people, and I break down right there. He agreed to keep it a secret, but he refused to do anything more than a simple make-out session until he had Padre’s consent to do so. Which I understood, consent is important, cheating is bad.

Now we’re having these ‘sessions’ at least once a week for almost 4 months. Patton eventually walked in on us and he was understandably upset. I explained what had happened and that I’ve had a crush on both of them for a while. And they’re like ‘cool, we’re polyam.’ And now I’m starting senior year dating two men, which mom and pa were not okay with. I told ‘em to fuck off and we moved away as soon as we graduated. They still call occasionally, asking when I’m gonna get my life together and get over losing ReeRee. I haven’t blocked ‘em yet in case they find her or change their minds.”

Roman finally took a deep breath. “Sorry about the rant. Didn’t realise how badly I needed to get that off my chest.”

Virgil snorted. “Don’t worry ‘bout it. Told ya I’d be a good ear. And Princey?”

“Yeah?”

“You don’t gotta do anything to impress someone else. You bein’ you is good enough. And if Rebecca could see you, I’m sure she’d be proud as hell. And don’t be ‘fraid to hit me up if you need someone other than your SOs to rant to; I’ll always be here for ya, Princey.”

“... Thank you, Virgil. I didn’t realize how much I needed to hear that until you said it.” He sighed, and Virgil could hear the sound of running water. “I’m gonna go drink some water. My throat burns like a bitch right now.”

“Same. Catch you later?”

He could hear Roman chuckle to himself. “I guess you shall. Farewell, Storm Cloud. And pleasant dreams!”

Virgil blushed. The way Roman said his nickname… it made Virgil’s gay heart nearly explode. He quickly hung up and buried his face back into his pillow. I’ll get water later. AFTER my heart stops racing.

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Now, for those of you wondering about why Virgil doesn't realize that Roman and Remus are brothers, I'm gonna put a quick explanation here, 'cause I don't know how to casually fit this into the story. 1.) Remus has never told Virgil his deadname or his last name. He's probably told Janus (since their pretty close) but Virgil doesn't know. 2.) Remus has never told Virgil that his brother's name is Roman. Additionally, when Virgil is talking about the 3 gays, he only calls them "Pat, Lo and Princey." 3.) Roman's parents didn't tell him that Remus transitioned, so he doesn't know that Rebecca now goes by Remus. Also, none of the characters have actually sent pictures of their faces, so none of them have any idea what the other looks like. 4.) It is a total coincidence that both twins moved to the same town. Remus believes that Roman still lives in their hometown, and Remus could be dead for all that Roman knows. There is no logical reason for them to think "maybe Virgil's friends with my long-lost sibling" 5.) Virgil would NEVER out his friends like that. He tells Janus and Remus everything, but he would NEVER betray Roman's trust like that. Same thing for telling Roman about Remus. Roman might know that Remus is trans, but he doesn't know about Remus' background. ONE LAST THING: Roman and Virgil will eventually see each other face-to-face but WON'T recognize each other's voices. This is because during the phone call Virgil is still groggy from waking up and Roman is still hoarse from screaming.

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Taglist: @bisexualdisaster106 @self-taught-mess @itawalrus @arodynamic-enby @sanderssides-angst

[thefinalcinderella]

Kaze ga Tsuyoku Fuiteiru Chapter 3 - Practice Begins (Part 2)

Full list of translations here

Translation Notes

1. I’m not entirely sure Kiyose’s talking about here (流して走る) but the closest thing I could find was “wind sprinting” which is a type of conditioning where you alternate between fast walking and jogging

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When Kakeru returned from university that evening, the residents of Chikusei-sou were lined up in the yard. Apparently, right when they returned home, Kiyose had been lying in wait and captured them in succession.

With everyone assembled, Kiyose opened his mouth.

“I made a rough practice plan. I want to divide it into levels, so run five-thousand meters seriously and get your time.”

He works fast, Kakeru thought, impressed, but the twins of course complained.

“We already ran this morning, but now we have to run again?”

“I’m exhausted. The top of my leg hurts somehow.”

Kiyose didn’t miss Jouji’s line complaining about the pain in his hip.

“Does it hurt a lot?”

“No, not that much.”

“Is it just because you’re still not used to running, because your form is bad, or because your joints are weak from the start? Which is it?” Kiyose worriedly bent down in front of Jouji and gently rubbed the base of his leg with his thumb.

“Hey, hey, Haiji-san. Stop touching me there.” Jouji twisted his body about as though he was feeling ticklish.

“I think it might be his shoes,” Kakeru pointed out. “Those are basketball shoes, aren’t they?”

“They are,” Kiyose said as he stood and checked everyone’s feet.

“Why are you guys wearing basketball shoes or just sneakers? Are you guys actually going to run?”

“It’s because these are all we’ve got,” Jouta—who was wearing matching basketball shoes with Jouji—said while hiding behind Prince. As for Prince, he was wearing what could only be described as “sports shoes”, which looked like he had bought them from a discount store.

“Buy running shoes,” Kiyose gave his order.

“We bought them.” Musa and Shindou held up bags from a sports equipment store. A moment later, Yuki also brought out the new shoes he was hiding behind his back.

“It was pretty fun when we ran this morning.”

“You got pretty fired up, even though you were so reluctant before,” Nico-chan butted in.

“Good.” Kiyose nodded. “The rest of you, buy shoes that fit your feet soon. And if you can, buy a watch that you can use to time yourself.”

“I’d like the same one as Kakeru’s.” Jouta peered at Kakeru’s wrist. “It’s cool. Is it Nike?”

Kakeru’s watch was a round, streamlined shape, made of plastic, loaded with functions, and very light. Of all the watches he had used until now, this one was his favorite.

“There’s different colors too. Besides having the functions of a stopwatch, there’s also a thing where it can add up the measured times one by one…”

Jouta and Jouji were making “Hmm hmm” sounds as they listened to Kakeru’s explanation.

“I have to find more work.”

“Like for mahjong, from now on, the residents of Aotake will not be allowed to work part-time jobs,” Kiyose informed them gravely just as Shindou said that. “Is this the time to be working? Focus on your training.”

“So, how will we be able to buy the shoes and watch?” King protested.

“By the way, buy sportswear as well.” Kiyose was the picture of composure. “You’re all wearing jerseys and sweats from high school, and in the extreme case of Prince, jeans. If you wear those kinds of things, your sweat will dry poorly and you’ll feel cold. When you’re training, you must prepare a towel and a change of clothes, and be sure to change as soon as you sweat.”

“And I’m telling you, how are we supposed to buy those things without a part-time job?” King snapped again.

“You know, if you’re training from morning to night, then there’ll be no time to play. Even if it’s just your allowance, you can save up money quickly.”

“Whaaaa—!”

Sounds of protest rose up once again.

“What are all of you complaining about in the yard?”

The door of the main house opened and the landlord, who was nominally their coach, came out. At the appearance of his owner, Nira, who had been lying sprawled out with his eyes shut, happily wagged his tail.

“If it’s money, don’t worry about it.” The landlord looked around at all of them. “I heard about it from Haiji. If you’re seriously aiming for Hakone, ask the supporters’ association to provide you with what you need.”

“Supporters’ association? Is there something like that at our school?” Yuki asked doubtfully.

“We’re going to make it now.” The landlord said. Oh no, Nico-chan muttered.

“Now, let’s head to the track.”

Urged on by Kiyose, they changed locations while wearing their usual clothes. Nira also followed along, perhaps thinking that they were going for a walk.

We’re probably going to record their times at the university grounds. That was what Kakeru thought, but Kiyose was walking quickly in the opposite direction. Their destination seemed to be the ward-run grounds just beyond the Sen River.

“Haiji-san, why aren’t we using the school grounds?” Kakeru asked suspiciously. “The school is closer to Aotake, and they’re maintained.”

“The grounds are used by all kinds of sports teams and clubs. It’ll be about a million years before our turn comes around.”

“But we’re the track and field club? Don’t we have priority to use the grounds?”

“Everything has a hierarchy,” Kiyose said with a cool tone. In other words, they were such a small club that no one was aware of their existence. Kakeru decided to keep quiet, so as to not provoke Kiyose unnecessarily.

Although grass was poking out here and there on the course, the ward-run grounds had a respectable four-hundred-meter track.

Kiyose briefly explained the practice menu: Before and after each full-scale practice, do about an hour of wind sprints every time; (1) do stretches; help massage each other; and so on.

“Does wind sprinting mean running slowly?” Musa asked.

“Yeah, it means running at a level where you aren’t putting too much pressure on your body. Suddenly starting or stopping running can cause injuries.”

“If we have to run an hour before practice, I’ll be dead tired just from that.” Prince said with a face of absolute despair.

“Prince, didn’t you somehow run 5k this morning? You’ll get used to it soon, so don’t worry,” Kiyose guaranteed forcefully. “If you train diligently, it’ll definitely pay off.”

Kiyose’s words weren’t a bluff. To run long-distance, you needed different muscles compared to sprinters; instead of exerting explosive physical strength in an instant, you had to maintain a constant propulsive force for a long period of time. Where the athlete’s ability is almost entirely determined by their innate muscle quality for short-distance, in the case of long-distance, it was possible to improve one’s ability little by little through practice.

Putting it another way, you couldn’t do well at long distances unless you thoroughly confronted your own body and practiced everyday. All sports required talent, but there was probably no sport other than long-distance running where the scales of talent and hard work were so heavily tilted towards the side of hard work.

At the deserted ward-run grounds, they decided to split into two groups and measure their times. It was decided that the people who complained that “we can’t do wind sprints for an hour before we do our times”—in other words, everyone other than Kakeru and Kiyose—would run five-thousand meters suddenly at full speed for the time being, since this was their first time. Kakeru and Kiyose took everyone’s time while they were wind sprinting together on the same track. By the time their bodies were relaxed, even Prince would probably be finished running, so the plan was for the two of them to take on five thousand meters with all their strength afterwards.

It required a lot of nerve to constantly check on a group running at full speed while sprinting. If you let your focus slip, you would lose track of how many laps they were approaching.

“It’d be nice if Nira could press the stopwatch.” Kiyose stared resentfully at Nira, who was sniffing at the ground in a corner of the sports ground. Kakeru ran leisurely next to him.

“Hey, Haiji-san. No matter how you look at it, it will be a bit difficult to bring Prince to a level where he can be in the qualifiers, won’t it?” Even now, Prince was significantly behind the others. “He’s more than a lap behind.”

“It’ll be fine,” Kiyose said again.

“And the reasoning behind that?”

“Kakeru, what kind of personality do you think is suited to long-distance running?”

“Well… There’s all kinds, but I guess being persevering and stuff like that?”

“I think it’s having a sticky nature. You saw Prince’s book hoard, didn’t you? It’s not common for someone to think about manga all the time like that. Prince devotes all his time and money to manga without going out at night or wasting his money. The resilience of that passion is amazing. Him not having a hard time steadily persisting with doing one thing definitely means he has the personality for long-distance.”

Kakeru glanced at Kiyose next to him. He had a serious look on his face. Apparently, he was praising him in earnest.

Right after everyone finished running five thousand meters, Kakeru filled in the recorded times on a piece of paper.

Kakeru – 14:38:37

Haiji – 14:58:54

Musa – 15:01:36

Jouji – 16:38:08

Jouta – 16:39:10

Shindou – 17:30:23

Yuki – 17:45:11

King – 18:15:03

Nico-chan – 18:55:06

Prince – 33:13:13

The residents formed a circle and peered at the paper.

“Kakeru, you held back, didn’t you?”

“I didn’t. I can’t always run at my best. And Haiji-san, aren’t you the one who’s not in regular condition?”

“I’m recovering. In any case, you’re just what I expected, Musa; you can definitely go to the thirteen-minute range.”

“No, I’ve already reached my limit. I thought my heart would break down.”

“Anyways, it’s not a bad result for your first time.” Kiyose looked over the faces of everyone gathered. “As I expected, all of you have lots of potential. If you can run this much at this level, then you will grow even more depending on training.”

Having received Kiyose’s seal of approval, the twins and Shindou happily exchanged high fives. However, Yuki seemed like he couldn’t accept his own time.

“Seventeen minutes…My form still isn’t streamlined enough.” It seemed that he had immediately started analyzing with that clear head of his.

“I’m at eighteen minutes anyways,” King sulked.

“Your sweat smells like nicotine,” Yuki pointed out to Nico-chan.

“Does it?” He sniffed his arms.

“King and Nico-chan-senpai’s bodies are just not used to running. There’s no problem with your forms, so you can steadily shorten your times from now on.” Kiyose smoothed things over flawlessly. “Now, let’s go back to Aotake and have dinner.”

Jouji tugged on the hem of Kiyose’s wear with his fingertips.

“Haiji-san, Haiji-san, you forgot one person.”

In a corner of the track, Prince had fallen face down on the ground. He didn’t even twitch when Nira worriedly nudged him with his nose.

“Prince’s time is…”

“Thirty-three minutes and thirteen-point-one-three seconds,” Kakeru told Kiyose.

“Yeah, it’s hard to comment on that.” Kiyose rubbed his temple. “But, well, just the fact that that manga otaku ran from beginning to end without a break should be praised. Let’s not give up hope.”

So you really do think of Prince-san as just an otaku, Kakeru thought, but kept silent.

“Starting tomorrow, we’ll be starting serious training. You ran 5k just now with all your strength, but from now on your distances will definitely increase and your times will get faster, so I want you to feel at ease and follow me. That’s all; disperse! Ah, of course we’re running back to Aotake.”

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[sie-werden-nie-vergessen]

“Ruth and Ephraim as a couple” headcanons/AU, ft “Sarah in Boston”

@shapeshiftersandfire, so here it is. I finished way earlier than I anticipated, but I just started typing and here it is!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=muFFeiBUffQ (this song is required listening when reading these headcanons. It IS Ephraim and Ruth’s theme song. I recommend starting it at 3:14 because that point of the song is the section that really gives me Ruth and Ephraim vibes) 

First off, there is SO much covert flirting. SO, SO MUCH FLIRTING.

Ephraim is definitely having an identity crisis on the way home after the card game.

He gets home and Deodat asks him how the party went and he just kind of stands there like an oaf.

“It went fine.”

“Are you sure?”

“No Yes”

“...okay”

Deodat doesn’t believe him but he assumes that maybe Ephraim was just rejected by a date or something. Little does he know…..

“Fire Meet Gasoline” is a very good analogy to their relationship.

Because not only would it be passionate

But their relationship would probably also develop very quickly

They wouldn’t rush things, per se, but the “crush” phase is definitely very short for them

They’re both very outspoken and confident, so they very quickly open up about their feelings rather than beating around the bush.

They’re both very passionate people in terms of personality, and even when Ephraim is open-minded enough to fall for Ruth, they still inevitably clash with their opinions

They don’t fight but they definitely debate.

But in a healthy way. The debates can get heated but not in a hostile way. They’re just both very opinionated and they get very passionate about their opinions and their different thought processes.

 “I know I’m right!” “Yeah well I know that I”M right!” “Well I think I’m right because xyz” “Well my reasons are abc” “...that’s a good point. But I’m still right ;)”

So it probably looks like arguing to some people, but they both know that it’s all in good humor so neither Ephraim or Ruth are actually hurt by it or anything

They actually think it’s a good source of entertainment.

They once got into a heated debate about the correct color of socks in the middle of the new Mill Valley department store just to see the reactions of the cashiers

The aforementioned cashiers were horrified

Ephraim was arguing in favor of brown socks, and Ruth in favor of gray.

They ended up buying both colors.

Ruth now buys him brown and gray socks for a gag gift every Christmas (were gag gifts a thing in 1898? No clue, but I like the idea so I’m running with it and not researching something for once).

Ephraim keeps her a secret for a long time, for obvious reasons.

Ruth doesn’t mind this because she understands his reasoning behind it. 

She takes it as an opportunity to introduce him to her family and friends.

Ephraim gets along great with her brother Charles, and almost immediately the “future brother in law” jokes start.

Ruth is surprisingly embarrassed by this.

Ephraim teases her for days about that fact.

“Finally! I finally found something that embarrasses you!”

Ephraim goes to her performances and cheers her on (he always brings a bouquet too)

He sits in the front row right at the bottom of the stage and claps the loudest when she comes on stage.

Ruth is big into theatrics and has an entire setup of smoke cannons and mood lighting that announce her entrance.

She steps into this cloud of smoke and raises her arms dramatically and announces herself

Ruth loves to wear the color red because it looks so striking against her pale skin, but she secretly loves lighter shades of blue even more (they just don’t give off very strong “mystical” vibes, so she sticks to dark reds when she’s in the spotlight)

She works as a fortune teller and does card tricks as well

She loves to hear the ridiculous rumors and urban legends surrounding the “mystical powers” of albinos and then she incorporates that into her routine

“ALBINOS CAN READ MINDS” okay, well now she does mind reading as a new trick

In reality she’s just a very analytical person so it’s easy for her to pick up on small body language or vocal cues

Ephraim always asks her to tell him her fortune and it inevitably turns into some sappy “well I think you’ll end up marrying an amazing circus performer who just so happens to also be the most beautiful woman in Pennsylvania” thing

Ephraim definitely agrees with her “fortune”

He tells her about Sarah pretty early on in the relationship. He doesn’t want to hide anything from her.

He isn’t sure how she’ll take it, especially considering the fact that he was complacent in Sarah’s abuse for years until he really got out into the world and realized that everything he “knew” about albinism was wrong.

Ruth is definitely shocked but she assures him that he’s not some sort of monster, because he realized that what his parents trained him to think was wrong and he was able to grow from that.

One day when the rest of the family is out, Ephraim sneaks Ruth into the mansion (with the help of Sylvie and Lou Lou, of course) and she goes down to the cellar to meet Sarah.

Sarah is absolutely floored that there are others like her.

Of course she knew, because Ephraim told her when he returned from college and made amends, but when she sees it infront of her eyes it’s still a shock.

Ruth and Sarah hit it off instantly, of course.

Ruth promises to take Sarah to see a circus someday

Sarah can’t wait to see the elephants.

A few days after the secret meeting, Ephraim decides to tell his family about Ruth.

He tells Harold, thinking that maybe Harold would understand

But Harold just rats him out to Deodat and Delanie

They’re furious, of course

They don’t tell Gertrude because they claim that it would give her a heart attack

And tbh, it might

Gertrude figures it out anyways from the deranged yelling that comes from downstairs

“After all we’ve done to hide Sarah, and now you do THIS?!!”

“Mother, there’s nothing wrong with her.”

“She’s a circus freak!”

“By choice. She enjoys working in sideshows. That doesn’t make her a bad person.”

“Are you sure she isn’t just trying to mooch off of OUR money?!”

“She’s very wealthy, Mother. She works because she enjoys it.”

Deodat has more or less the same reaction.

Harold just can’t believe that Ephraim would “betray” the family in that way.

Ephraim tells Ruth the next day, and they decide to take Sarah away and leave for Boston.

Charles helps with the legal side of things, and pulls a few strings with his lawyer friends in Pennsylvania to have Sarah legally emancipated from her parents.

The trio moves to Boston and temporarily lives with Charles and his wife Louisa.

Louisa is smitten with Sarah from the start and insists on baking her ridiculous amounts of gingerbread.

(For no reason, really, but Louisa just has a thing for gingerbread. Sarah doesn’t complain)

Sarah gains quite a lot of weight in those first few months, and for the first time in her life she weighs a healthy amount. 

Ruth takes her clothes shopping often, and she insists on buying Sarah the nicest and newest fashions (even though she grows out of them so quickly now. It’s as if 18 years of growing have finally caught up with her at once).

Sarah hugs Ephraim for the first time after she and Ruth return from their first major shopping trip. Ephraim almost cries, and Ruth grins so hard that her face hurts. 

Ephraim wasn’t sure if Sarah could ever forgive him, but that was proof enough for him.

Ruth gives Sarah her first diamond necklace. It’s the one that Ruth wore the day she met Sarah. Sarah had said that it was the prettiest thing that she had ever seen, and Ruth saved it for her until they reached Boston. It was an informal adoption gift, really.

Ephraim and Ruth eventually buy a nice brownstone in Boston. It’s a few streets away from Charles and Louisa’s home, and there’s a large park across the street.

Sarah loves to sit in the park and watch the swans and ducks on the pond.

Sometimes Ruth and Ephraim go with her, but a lot of the time they let her go alone. They know that she’s been through a lot, and that sometimes she needs time alone to process everything. 

Sometimes she comes back with tears in her eyes, but no one mentions it. Ruth brings her a cup of tea or a piece of gingerbread (Louisa is always sending over fresh gingerbread) and offers her a shoulder to cry on, if she needs it.

Ruth takes Sarah to meet her fellow albino circus performers. For once in her life, Sarah feels truly accepted and understood when she stands in a room surrounded by people like her.

There are so many children in the room, and they’re all so loved by their family members, regardless of their albinism. It makes Sarah sad at first, but she’s also happy to see that they were raised in loving households instead of abusive and hateful ones.

For their first Christmas together in Boston, Ephraim buys Sarah a Kodak No. 2 Bullseye Camera. When the first Kodak Brownie camera is released a few years later in 1900, he buys her one of those as well.

He tells her that she can use it to document her new life in Boston.

The first picture she takes is a picture of a sleeping Ephraim.

He’s sitting in an armchair next to the Christmas tree, surrounded by wrapping paper and plates of half finished cookies.

Once the picture is developed, she puts it in her new photo album that Charles and Louisa gave to her.

When Ephraim woke up, Sarah asked to take a picture with him. 

Of course he obliged.

She keeps that one in a frame by her bedside.

Sarah has a whole pile of her “treasures” that she keeps beside her bed, but that picture is at the center of it all. 

Ephraim notices it one time when he’s helping Ruth collect the laundry, and it touches him more than he can say.

For her gift, Ruth arranges for Sarah to take some writing classes at the local women’s college.

Sarah is thrilled. She starts to write stories other than horror.

She still loves scary stories, but she finds a new love for children’s stories and romance novels.

Little Women is her favorite (Ruth is delighted! It was her favorite book too!)

In 1900 Ruth and Ephraim have a son. They name him Eli, in reference to Sarah’s middle name (Elizabeth).

Sarah is the proudest aunt you’ve ever seen. 

Ephraim and Ruth go on to have more children, but Sarah has a special bond with little Eli. He is the first baby that she ever held.

The odd little family on Pearl Street is probably the happiest family you’ll ever see.

Sarah eventually marries the son of one of Ruth’s circus colleagues. 

His name is Thomas, and he’s a quiet man.

He loves birds too, just like Sarah. 

He and Sarah go bird watching often.

They go on to have a large family. 2 out of the 5 children have albinism, but they love all of their children the same.

They live a long life.

Neither Ephraim, Ruth, or Sarah ever return to Mill Valley. They’re more than happy to let the past remain in the past.

Bonus: Harold In Boston Headcanons/AU

Once Ephraim does reach out to Harold, and he’s surprised to learn that Harold has also distanced himself from their parents.

Gertrude died in 1899, and shortly after that Harold’s fiancée Violet died of tuberculosis. With his ties to Mill Valley significantly loosened, Harold took an extended business trip to Philadelphia where he eventually opened his own publishing company. After the mercury scandal at the mill, Deodat and Delanie are essentially ruined and Harold is free to pursue his own interests independent of the mill.

He goes to visit Ephraim in 1900 to congratulate him on the birth of his son. 

It’s tense at first, when he see’s Sarah. He isn’t sure how she’ll react to him.

She’s wearing a white lace dress with small puffs at the sleeves, and pale blue ribbons at the cuffs and waist of the skirt.

Her hair is in a soft gibson girl-esque style, and Harold realizes that it’s the first time he’s ever seen her in anything other than the old gown she always wore back in Pennsylvania.

“Hello Sarah”

“Hello Harold”

He isn’t sure what to do at first, but Ruth quickly introduces herself to abate the awkward silence.

He’s never met Ruth, but he quickly understands why Ephraim likes her so much.

After he meets the baby and pleasantries are exchanged, he wanders off into one of the upstairs rooms of the home.

(Sarah left the room once Ruth brought out the baby. She loves Eli, but she feels awkward being everyone all at once, as if she’s intruding on something she isn’t, of course).

He accidentally goes into Sarah’s room, only to find her at her desk writing.

Her room is nothing like the dark basement she used to call home, and Harold is thankful for that.

“So, you still write?”

Sarah jumps in her chair a little, before suddenly whipping around. She’s still not good with loud or sudden noises, even after 3 years of safety.

Harold cringes when she jumps. He hates that he still scares her.

When she composes herself, she smiles a small smile. “Yes, I still write.”

Harold asks what she writes about these days, and she tells him that she writes children’s stories.

It’s a sad irony, considering the mercury scandal, but Harold doesn’t tell her about that yet.

She had left Mill Valley before the worst of it, and he knows how much she loved those children.

After they talk for a while, Sarah eventually invites him to sit with her.

They sit side by side on her bed and she shows him her notebooks.

He’s surprised by how much she’s grown since he last saw her. She’s a little taller now, and she’s gained a lot of weight. Her face isn’t hollow anymore, and her eyes are bright now. Her hair is shiny and thick, and she truly looks happy.

She only shakes a little when he’s so close to her. Harold still scares her a little, but Ephraim promised her that no one would ever hurt her again.

Sarah trusts Ephraim immensely, so she’s willing to trust Harold too

Still, it’s a little hard for her to have him in such close proximity.

Harold notices her discomfort and moves a few inches away (still close enough to see her notebooks, but far enough that it gives Sarah a safe buffer). Her nerves calm down once she has a “safe zone.”

Harold finally works up the nerve to say something.

“Sarah, I-”

“I know. Ephraim told me.”

“He did?”

“He did”

“Well...that’s...that’s good.”

The next thing that Sarah does shocks Harold to his core.

She reaches out, her hands shaking, and grabs his hand.

“I know that you didn’t mean it - what you did to me -...not really, anyways. I know you’re different now.”

Harold squeezes her hand in return, and she stops shaking.

“Thank you”

Sarah smiles

“Of course”

Ephraim happens to pass Sarah’s bedroom on his way upstairs and nearly dies of shock at the site of them. Harold doesn’t notice Ephraim, but Sarah does.

She bursts out laughing, because Ephraim genuinely looks horrified, shocked, and immensely confused.

“He said that he was sorry!,” she explained in a half yell in Ephraim’s direction.

Ephraim is still in shock, so he doesn’t say anything.

Harold is also in shock, but because of Sarah’s laugh.

The man genuinely didn’t think that it was possible, and yet here she was laughing.

When everyone recovers from their respective shocks, Harold is invited to stay for dinner.

This dinner invitation turns into a long term stay, and eventually Harold moves his business to Boston.

He buys the brownstone next to Ephraim and Ruth’s home.

He remains a bachelor all his life, never having truly recovered from Violet’s death.

Harold definitely earns the title of “World’s Greatest Uncle” in regards to Sarah and Thomas’ children.

By 1980 the neighborhood block is so full of Bellows descendants that it’s unofficially renamed Bellows Square

Ruth and Ephraim’s house becomes a local historic landmark, considering the fact that Ephraim went on to become one of the country’s early geneticists who (humanely) studied genetic disorders and medical conditions.

The house later becomes a museum in the early 90s, having been restored to the same state that it was when they once resided in it.

Sarah’s Kodak No. 2 Bullseye is put on display, but the crowning achievement is her collection of photo albums and notebooks. She went on to become a children’s writer and illustrator, basing many of her books on her experiences in Boston. 

The old Bellows Paper Mill is torn down in 1948 to make room for new housing following the G.I. Bill and the post-war Baby Boom.

None of the surviving Bellows are sad to see it go.

[sugarless-suki-writes]

First Lines Meme

Tagged by @nikkxb -- sorry it's taken me so long to get to this, lmao

Rules: List the first lines of your last 20 stories (if you have less than 20, just list them all!)

See if there are any patterns.

Choose your favorite opening lines.

Then tag 10 authors!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I just kinda went to my recents on my google docs, so this is gonna have a mix of stuff, some original stuff too. ye :3 but I'm starting with fics that I currently have posted online. All of them are the first paragraph of the update that's in progress

Favorites have bolded and italicized titles :3

1. Sobriety || KouKag

Kagome had three sessions of therapy so far and she wasn’t fully sure how to feel. She knew it was helping her, but she was left feeling so.... raw and open after every session that she felt like she was just back pedaling and it was hard to cope with. A part of her wanted to just stop altogether and go back to self medicating, but she knew that this was just part of the process. The first couple sessions were going to be hard because there was just so much to unpack, but her therapist was nice and calm and patient with her. She really had to thank Kouga again when she saw him later today.

2. 100 Arms, 100 Years || KouKag

This was the fifth day that an offering had been left in front of Kagome’s door for her. The fifth time she would receive the carcass of a large animal that she wouldn’t accept. The fifth time that Inuyasha found himself in front of her and Kikyō’s shared hut and bringing the carcass to the village for her. His fifth time taking the credit for a hunt he had no part in. He had to admit, this was quickly grating on his nerves. He hated the attention that he was getting from the villagers now. They praised him for shit that he didn’t do. That, and he didn’t want to be praised for anything. It was bad enough that he practically had the Sacred Jewel within his grasp and wasn’t able to use it to become a full-fledged youkai, but now he was being celebrated as a hero by some mere humans? Keh... they’re lucky I don’t tell them what this is all actually about. I bet they wouldn’t be so happy then. He sniffed and scratched at his nose. He talked a big game, but Inuyasha knew deep down that he would never do anything to hurt them. If he did that, that would in turn hurt Kikyō and he couldn’t do that to her.

3. Big God || KouKag

Kagome let out a frustrated huff as she shoved her phone into her pocket. She then plopped down onto the couch, tucking her legs up underneath her and curling into Kouga’s side. “That’s the fourth test we’ve ran, and we just... can’t figure out what the hell that stuff is... It’s so frustrating!” she grumbled.

4. You are the Moon || KouKag

Kagome took care of dinner that night, going out to pick up a few things she would need before returning home and cooking. Her mother tried to talk her out of it, but Kagome insisted, wanting to give her mother a break for the night and do something nice for the family. She missed them, and she wanted to make up for being gone for so long.

5. The Demon of Nabewari Yama || KouKag

Kagome let out a small huff as she looked up at the mountain she was heading towards. She had been traveling for several days, bordering a week now, looking for somewhere to settle. However, all the villages she had come across already had a miko or monk residing there, and if they didn’t, they didn’t want one. To be fair, there weren’t many villages she had come across between her hometown and here, and sure, maybe she should go further out after completing her training, but it was still just a little frustrating.

6. Seasons of Love || ZelGan

Zelda looked herself over in the mirror, and the corners of her lips pulled down into a small frown. Her hair was pulled up into an extravagant updo, several locks braided and pulled into the bun that rested on the back of her head. There were some flowers pinned in as well, all of them white in color. She would have preferred something with a pop of color, so they would stand out against her hair; but she figured that, in the end, everything had to match her dress.

7. Gerudotown || ZelGan -- Title may change for this, idk lmao

Ganondorf let out a grunt as he dismounted from his horse. The beast was large with a jet-black coat and a matching mane. He gave the steed a pat on his neck before handing the reins to a stable boy, holding back a chuckle from the look on the boy’s face. He was certain the child had never seen a beast so big, nor a Gerudo, based on how he was looking up at Ganondorf with wide, disbelieving eyes.

8. Shit, Let's be Pirates || DaveJade

Jade ran down the dirt path leading to a hidden beach. She had just gotten out of class and was eager to go down to the coves. She wanted to find some cool shells and snap a couple pictures for her biology class. She always went above and beyond in that class, but she just had a passion for marine life.

9. Changing Fate || ZelGan

“You can’t possibly be serious about this, father!” Zelda snapped indignantly. Her hands were balled into fists at her sides and her face was contorted in rage. King Rimoll let out a sigh and pinched the bridge of his nose. They had been at this “conversation” for what felt like hours. He didn’t expect it to go this badly. Of course, he didn’t expect it to go well in the first place, but this was beyond what he anticipated.

10. Moon Bonds || KouKag

All Hallow’s Eve. A powerful night for witches and magick users alike. A night that better helped connect them to the spirits of the earth and those who had been lost. It was a night that Kagome looked forward to every year. The surge of magick that tingled under her skin and filled her very being... by the goddess it was an amazing feeling. And this year would be even more delightful and powerful.

11. Princess and the Pirate || Amuto

Growing up, Amu had been told many stories about pirates, everyone on her small island had. But Amu felt as if she had heard more than most. Her mother would tell her tales before bed about the pirates on a ship called the Emerald Line. Despite the name of the ship, its hull and sails were completely black. The only speck of color was the pirate flag it flew, which was emerald green and depicted a cat head with crossbones beneath. It was also known to be the fastest ship to sail the seas.

12. The Black Card || KouKag

Kagome paced around her room in her tiny apartment, struggling with picking out an outfit. It was her first day off in a while and she wanted to look cute, seeing as she wouldn’t be restricted by her, somewhat lenient (semi-strict?), dress code at the bookstore. However, she also wanted to be comfortable, so she was at a bit of an impasse. It wasn’t really as big a deal as she was making it out to be, but she was exhausted and she hoped that dressing nice would throw Sango off her trail. With a huff, she finally settled on a nice sundress she had stuffed in the back of her closet, one she rarely wore and almost forgot she had. It was light blue in color with a floral print.

13. Harvest Moon || KouKag

Kagome stretched as she woke up that morning. She opened her eyes and saw the torn-up ceiling and frowned to herself ever so slightly. She had moved into the country several days ago and had only recently started working on repairs that her home needed. It was a pretty large house, but the rent was extremely cheap. The only downside was she had to pay for the repairs, but in all honesty… she wasn’t too bothered by it. Apparently the house had been abandoned for years. No one was really sure how long... but Kagome could take a guess that it had been at least a decade with how worn down and dirty things were.

14. Memories || Original Fic - No Pairing

Lotus looked around at the scene before her. It would be an easy job, simple. She could do it in her sleep no problem. She scoffed and looked at the man beside her. “Really? You need me for this?” she asked. He turned to look at her, a scowl on his face.

15. Any Way the Wind Blows || ZelGan

Zelda woke up to the sun on her face. She grumbled and grunted, rolling over onto her side on her small mat. She opened her eyes and looked out ahead of her, at the grass and flowers swaying in the breeze. Her stomach gurgled and she placed a hand on it, a grimace on her lips. Food...

16. Found || KouKag

When Kouga had heard that there was a disturbance along one of their borders, he had been prepared for anything. He pulled together a team quickly, not taking all the strongest warriors, making sure to leave some behind to protect his pack. They ran off, ready to fight. Ready for anything. Anything except this.

17. Interlude IV (Showtime) || KouKag

O Signore, per amor del tuo nome, perdonami la mia iniquità... Perciocche ellà e grande Kagome sat there in the street, blood seeping through her clothes and soaking her knees. Tears continued to stream down her cheeks in a never ending flow. Her breath kept catching in the back of her throat as she tried to force down her sobs. Her hands were curled up into fists, pressed against the pavement, soaked in blood and in pain from being clenched so tightly and pressed so firm against the rough asphalt. Regret, despair, and guilt crushed her heart. They squeezed tight, holding onto her and keeping her trapped in the moment. A moment she’d rather drink away and forget, only for her guilty conscious to bring it back in her dreams at night, keeping her away from the blissfulness of sleep.

18. Bubblegum & Nicotine || Original Fic -- Astrid/Loki

Astrid opened the door to the apartment and latched her keys onto her belt loop. She then bent over to pick up the bags of groceries she had set on the ground to unlock the front door. Once she had crossed the threshold into the house, she raised up her right leg and kicked the door closed behind her. With a bit of a grunt, she hoisted the bags up a tad higher and made her way to the kitchen. She set them down on the counter with a thud and took a moment to catch her breath. She may be in good shape, but carrying several pounds of groceries up three flights of stairs because the elevator was out? That would wind anyone.

19. We Are Complicated || Bubbline

Bonnibel Kaugummi entered the school and was quick to drop her things off in her locker so she could head straight to the Student Council room. She grabbed a couple of her books out of the locker and shoved them into her messenger bag. The tan colored bag complimented her uniform, which consisted of a grey sweater, a red ribbon tied into a neat bow, which was neatly tucked underneath the collar of her white button up shirt underneath her sweater, and a red plaid skirt. The red accents to her uniform identified her as a Junior, and they complimented her red-orange hair and rosy complexion.

20. The End of All Things || KouKag

Kagome let out a soft sigh as she curled up in her spot on the bench, bringing her legs up to her chest. She was sitting out on the small deck that overlooked the garden in her backyard and watching the rain. It was fairly cool out thanks to the constant drizzle that had begun early that morning. The sound of it pattering against the ground and roof that extended over the deck filled her with a sense of calm, a calm that she desperately needed right about now. Working as a nurse wore her out. She loved her job, of course, but gods if it didn’t have its trials and tribulations. She had been working almost every day for a solid two weeks now, covering shifts for people on top of her own. Thankfully she had a couple of her shifts taken from her after being at the hospital for a full 24 hours at one point in time. Today just so happened to be her natural day off, and she felt pretty great about it.

[scavengerconstellation]

On the cyberbullying and pain that we, Reylos, have had to endure since 2015:

* TRIGGER WARNING: r*pe and s*icide* 

Sorry for any typos. English is not my first language.

Hi! Welcome to the wonderful fandom that Reylo is, if you are new. You’ll be always welcome here. 

I just want to introduce myself: I’m Elizabeth, I’m 28 years old (oh, I know that some of you will tell me that I’m a grandma and I shouldn’t be on Tumblr... Let a girl have some fun). 

Reylo was the thing I focused on when my ex fiancé, the one who asked me to marry him after being together for almost 6 years, left me for someone else. I still remember it. All too well (hey, my Swifties!!!). He asked me to marry him the same month that The Force Awakens came out. It was magical. Two days after leaving, he got engaged to the person he was cheating me with. Why the fuck am I telling you all this? Because it matters. Because we forget that are REAL PEOPLE behind Internet accounts with real stories. 

Reylo was the only thing that kept me alive: I have NO recollection of 2016. I spend an entire month in a bed, feeling empty. Took three years to feel ok. BUT: when I looked at Tumblr, I felt better. I saw that some people started talking, with that fear that was a trait of us, the OG Reylos back then: we couldn’t speak about Rey and Kylo out loud... Because the hate we got was vicious. VICIOUS. I wish I was exagerating. Oh not only online (I WISH IT WAS ONLY ONLINE). 

Let me recount the ways I’ve been treated for being a Reylo, without ME doing NOTHING to provoke it (even though we all have bad seeds in our fandoms... and believe me, I’ve been in many: the Reylos are the SMARTEST, most wonderful people I’ve ever met online):

- Chastised for being “pro abuse”, “pro r*pe”

- I’ve been told to k*ll myself

- I’ve been told to get r*ped

- A real friend of mine of 7 years, told me that I was sick and I should seek therapy. He offered me to “teach me what feminism is”. A man. A MAN. TEACHING ME. ABOUT. FEMINISM. He did me a favor getting the fuck out of my life, though. He proceeded to write long texts on his social media platforms talking about how the Reylos should be k*lled, that we are not people, etc.

***** TRIGGER WARNING: R*pe and s*icide *******

I’ve been wanting to tell my story so many times. SO MANY TIMES. Every time someone told me that I should get r*ped over a fictional couple... It was like a shot to the heart. Because yes: #metoo. Me too. Sadly... Me too. It is the first time I’m writing something like this online. I will delete it later. Only my psychiatrist and a bunch of really good friends know my truth. But the truth is, that yes, I’m a survivor. I’m 28, and each year I told myself that I was finally gonna do it. That I wouldn’t make it to 14. 15. 16. 17. 18. 19. 20. 21. 22. 23. 24. 25. 26. 27. 28... See a pattern there? And when I finally told my truth to someone, I started HEALING. And it got easier. And easier. And easier. But each fucking time they tell me to get r*ped or to k*ll myself, it’s hard. Because I know I’m not the only one. Each time we get those comments online, like we are nothing, like we have no feelings... Damn. Just remember that there are people behind these accounts. I’m an adult. I won’t do anything because someone online told me too. But what about the kids in the fandom? There are teenagers going some through serious stuff and this should be their happy, safe space, to talk about what they love, what they don’t and how they feel if they want to. 

So yes. In 22 days we’re getting an ending, and we don’t know what it is. What it will be. The only thing I will remember about this, is the journey we’ve taken together, all of us. I will remember forever that I met MY FRIEND here, my little sister, my wonderful @anfantsypants. She is the best thing I got from Tumblr. And @majestic-barn-owl-02: my smol bean.

Enjoy the ride, and please, if you NEED TO TALK TO SOMEONE, I’m HERE. Because if we get Bendemption and Reylo... Well. They’re not going to be nice.

Just keep going on: it will get better.

May the Force be with you.