#allergies so bad i tested myself for covid (it was negative)

[flatoatchi]

sooooo fucked up that im allergic to pine pollen when I live in the pine tree state. and that pine pollen season starts in late February up here

[kafus]

really glad i saved these raids... i'm bringing walking wake to regionals and i decided i wanted one in a beast ball and to leave my main file one untouched

side note btw i might be kinda inactive for a bit, regionals prep and uh. i've been sleeping like shit and i need to catch up on sleep some. plus i've been kinda congested and feeling crummy for a couple days, can't tell if it's a small cold or allergies or the weather rapidly changing or bad sleep or stress or all of the above but i really need to take care of myself so i feel better by the time i leave for my trip (it is NOT covid, symptoms are not the same as when i had covid last year and i took a test and it came back negative :thumbs_up: i think i've just kinda stressed myself into mild illness lol)

[daxhalfawake]

FUCK.

So, I knew some of this bc my step-grandmother-in-law got COVID and insisted it was allergies and was dead from a stroke caused by a weird blood clot that they know is a type that happens in long COVID literally 6 months later. And I got COVID last year, despite doing everything I could not to, because my wife's boss came back to work too soon, without testing negative. I was 5 weeks pregnant. My wife's infection involved mostly wheezing and coughing and shortness of breath. I had a fever of 102°, a migraine, bad congestion and a gross cough. We both had the body aches real bad.

My COVID infection triggered essential hypertension (high blood pressure, I'm 30 [29 when I got COVID] and wasn't eating too poorly then, but I do eat better now). My blood pressure was consistently reading at stroke-risk levels and I had to go on blood pressure meds. I've had several other new or worsening health issues since the infection that my doctors have yet to pinpoint the cause of, but we haven't been focused on the cause because I was very sick and the cause wouldn't be environmental.

But on the neurological/brain damage - I got COVID, had 2 miscarriages, then fell into derealization for 8 months so I thought that was most of it but like there are things I never got with derealization before and that haven't gotten better since coming out of it.

I type a phrase I've been using correctly my entire life and then stare at it bc it looks wrong and I don't know why but I can't send it if it's wrong (spoiler: it has never actually been wrong). I've started using words that I haven't used since high school - problematic ones that I stopped even thinking about using bc they were problematic - and I have been horrified at myself despite most of these words having been used only in my own company. I literally have to remind myself that we don't use that word anymore if it pops into my head because my filters are also off now. My eyes unfocus and I cannot get them to refocus. And I use the wrong words sometimes, words that don't even make sense in reference to the one I need - but that one's getting better. I can't remember things like I used to. Like I have memory issues and have my whole life, don't get me wrong - I'm ADHD and I have cPTSD - but this is different. Because I also have a selective photographic memory and I used to be able to walk myself backwards to find things I put in weird places with ease and now I lose everything for way too long and it triggers autistic meltdowns. My brain fog from my various conditions is significantly worse - to the extent that even on my Adderall, my mind will go completely empty while I am in the middle of speaking a sentence and I will lose my entire train of thought and not be able to remember without prompting from an active listener to the conversation; sometimes not even then.

Literally TONIGHT, in the aftermath of an autistic meltdown I was trying to articulate to my wife why I need more mental processing time in the middle of a conversation, and I mentioned that sometimes I'm trying to keep up with the conversation and her words stop being English to my brain. Not being able to understand words is mentioned in this article from Harvard University, and I have been becoming INCREASINGLY AND INCREDIBLY FRUSTRATED with the fact that I "all of a sudden" started having these episodes where someone is talking to me and their words start out okay and then they flip and it sounds like a garbled mess of sounds, not even words.

I just want to remind people that it’s 2024 and we didn’t “go thru a pandemic” we are “going thru a pandemic” present tense. It is still happening. People are still get sick, still becoming disabled, and still dying. Covid hasn’t gone away and I beg people to not normalize getting sick with it.

[jodilin65]

Just an initial update that I started yesterday but was too out of it to share. There’s more to come but I may not get to it today.

It's been a scary and frustrating last couple of days. I was short of breath and feeling horrible because every time I fell asleep, I would wake up suffocating. Realizing that it had nothing to do with a lack of fluids or carbs, I started to suspect I had COVID. Then we both came to suspect, especially after learning that my nasal spray was a steroid and not a blocker like what I used to take, that the stupid pulmonologist was wrong to increase my dose. It only made my nose stuffier. AI said it could make my lungs tight as well, but since it wouldn't quit and it was so bad it kept me up, we went to the Minute Clinic. They were really worried about my blood pressure at first because the top number hit 184. Then it was 178 and eventually 153.

The only funny part was that the nurse shared the same name as a rather infamous woman whose name I won’t mention. “Yep,” she said dubiously when I said the name, no doubt wishing her mother had picked any other name for her. The poor girl probably gets comments all the time.

They tested me for COVID, and I was negative. They also said my lungs and nose looked fine, although they didn’t have the tools to look far up in my nose at my septum. I haven't had any lung congestion or cough, and the stuffiness in my nose was dry. The nurse recommended Claritin and wrote out a prescription for methylprednisolone to be taken for six days.

On the way out of CVS, we decided to grab a candy bar and soda with caffeine. It was my first candy bar in months, but I didn’t care. I needed the caffeine to keep going because we had to stop and charge the car for half an hour since the traffic was so bad it drained the battery more than we expected. We couldn’t go to the closer Minute Clinic because they didn’t have an appointment available until late in the afternoon, so we had to go all the way to Tarpon Springs and had been up for a long time.

We got home, and I took Claritin, but my lungs were still tight, and I had other symptoms as well. I lost another pound and am now down to 155, been poopy, and feeling very wound up. That’s when it hit me that I had two problems. Yes, the Nasacort was wrong for me, but when I put my symptoms together, I realized my TSH had gotten too low. The only unusual thing was that my heart wasn’t racing like crazy. But I was warm, definitely having sleep issues, lung tightness, and anxiety. I had also been snacking on peanuts and thought my weight would jump back up, but it went down instead. Trust me, I never lose weight on peanuts and candy bars.

The night before last, I only slept 5 hours and 5 minutes after being up for around 20 hours. I had the same problem last night where as soon as I’d fall asleep, I’d either suffocate or snore myself awake. After being up around 20 hours again, I put the mouth guard in, grateful that I hadn’t ditched it, and it helped keep me from snoring and made it easier to breathe. So it wasn’t $60 wasted after all. This time, I managed to sleep 5 hours and 48 minutes, and I even napped for about an hour later on.

I’m still afraid to go to bed because I fear the same thing will happen. I’m scared I’ll be up forever, and that it’s going to take me a few attempts of falling asleep and waking right back up to finally fall asleep and stay asleep. The guard is ready to be thrown back in my mouth if worse comes to worst. I’m also sleeping with a nose strip. I started to fear this climate was backfiring on me and flaring up my asthma and allergies and that we’d have to leave. It’s definitely not helping my allergies, but I’m now 99% sure the lung tightness was from the medication I’m stuck with for life. I skipped today’s dose and will probably skip tomorrow as well until the anxiety backs off some more.

I think I’m feeling a little better now, but that’s what I thought at the end of yesterday and the day before, so I’m not assuming I’m out of the woods yet. It takes several days to feel better after an overload of levothyroxine, and well, nothing’s ever brief for me.

I messaged Rhonda, and it was frustrating because, unlike Galileo, I’m limited in how many characters I can send in a message, so I had to break it up into six messages. I updated her on everything, from the pulmonologist to the ENT to my latest crisis.

This is the second crazy crisis this year. I just can’t get a break, and sometimes I really wish I could just kill myself. After a decade of suffering so much, I really believe I’m doomed to suffer for the rest of my life. I don’t think I’ll ever get a break where I don’t have any problems, feel well, and sleep well for any extended time. Hell, I can’t even go a fucking week!

I feel trapped because I can’t end it because of him. I would have ended my misery years ago if it weren’t for him. Not until he goes can I do that. So nearly two more decades of suffering.

I also asked Rhonda about the CPAP or a mouthguard. I looked it up and found that primary care providers can write prescriptions for CPAPs. Maybe a mouthguard is my best bet after all. I would need a referral for that. Hopefully, it wouldn’t take six months to get an appointment, and hopefully, they wouldn’t cancel on me.

The only thing I hate about not having Galileo is the waiting time to hear back from Rhonda. I just want to know what to do from here. Obviously, my dose has to be scaled back, but the question is how much? Should I do a mixed dose, skip when I don’t feel good, or go back to all 75s? There is such a fine line between helpful and hurtful with this fucking poison! I’m guessing Rhonda will want me to go to the lab or come in and see her. The problem is that the labs will be deceptive because I have to skip ASAP. As I’ve learned the hard way, if I don’t jump on scaling back right away, the problem only gets worse. The skip will reflect in my TSH right away, even though I won’t feel the effects for a while. So now I’m not sure if I ever really lost weight due to cutting sugar. I might have lost a few pounds, but after that, I think the medication ramped up, and losing the 10 pounds fueled the medication’s effects.

I felt so bad for Tom because he was up forever as well because I felt so shitty, but I’m forever grateful to him, of course. The poor guy kept waking up with leg cramps, so he had to get up to drink fluids each time.

There’s more to update on, but I’m running out of energy, so I’ll have to do it tomorrow. Hopefully, I can make it to 7 hours of sleep before being up for 20!

[bitletsanddrabbles]

-Saturday-

Me: YAY! Mum is back from camp and my vacation starts Tuesday! ...well, Monday when I get off of work! Going to have so much fun and be so productive! Tuesday we can finally get that project we were going to do two weeks ago done and -

Mum: I caught Covid at camp.

Me: ...dear Universe. Fuck you.

-Sunday-

Me: Okay, food figured out through dinner on Monday. This is a start... Really wish I could go and eat with Mum like normal. I no longer have a kitchen, just a craft lab. Oh well. Three cheers for take out. Didn't sleep well last night, but hopefully tonight...

-Yesterday-

Me: *didn't sleep well* *comes home early from work and takes a damn nap* Ah well. At least I'm better rested. Can't do things with Mum tomorrow, but I can be productive by myself! Maybe do some yarn stuff, maybe write.

Dad: By the way, my cousin has cancer. Doing pretty badly.

Me: Well shit.

-Today-

Me: Okay! On vacation! Slept well. Having lunch with the healthy parents if my Covid test comes up negative. Hey test, what have you to say?

Test: Good news - you don't have Covid!

Me: YAY!

Test: Bad news - you still have allergies.

Allergies: HI HOW YOU DOING!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Me: .........................................*long stream of obscenities*

[twistedtummies2]

It Finally Happened.

So, starting on Sunday, I started feeling ill: MAJOR congestion, a mild headache, and eventually a fever. On Tuesday, after working on a commission for a few hours, I basically went straight to bed and promptly slept for almost 16 hours straight. After that, I felt better, but still ill; as I type this, I'm still very stuffed up, and the headache is still present. As it turns out, my parents were feeling ill with similar symptoms. Now, all three of us were pretty sure this was just severe allergies, for a lot of reasons...but my brother was getting worried, so he very wisely decided to buy us a proverbial butt-ton of Covid home tests, and then immediately took one upon returning home. He tested positive, so the rest of us had to take them...and all of us tested positive. Myself included. Yes. I have The Rona. Now, before you all panic, I think I'm going to be okay: like I said, I've been improving, health-wise. I'm not at 100%, but the fever appears to be gone entirely, and I'm nowhere near "take a 16 hour long nap" levels of ill. Plus, when I took the test, the line was VERY faint, which could mean either a false positive or a sure sign that I am, indeed, in the waning stages of the virus. So I think I'll be fine. More than anything, right now, I'm sad and angry (starting to border on mildly depressed), because this means it's very, VERY likely I'll be spending Christmas cooped up at my house with practically nothing to do. And THAT wouldn't be SO bad, except that I have a friend who has no one to spend the holidays with. We invited him to Christmas dinner at my grandparents'...but since we won't be going, and can't pick him up (the poor fellow has to carpool with my family for this), the chances are he won't be either. If there's one thing I hate more than spending Christmas in quarantine, it's knowing that my friend has to spend it all alone. That really, really makes me sad. So...yeah. Physically, it's okay, I'm pretty sure I'll be alright. I'll keep my closer friends posted on updates, and as soon as I test negative, I'll let everybody know. I'm also fairly sure that I'll be okay by the time I need to return to the theatre for the play I'm in. (On that note, the ankle is GREATLY improved, too.) The real damage is emotional, so to speak. ON THE BRIGHTER SIDE OF LIFE: I have only a few commissions from November left to complete. I will be resuming work on those after Christmas, although I can't say exactly which day of the week yet. Also, I will be posting a journal sometime between tomorrow and Monday with the updates and changes that will be in place for commissions thiscoming new year. But having said that...I think this guy sums up my basic emotional state at the moment...

[creek-cryptid-deluxe]

Hey everyone (aka the like... 2 to 5 entities that actually read my bullshit) sorry I've kinda not been *actually* posting but just reblogging random stuff I enjoyed seeing. Things have been... rough. So here's a smol condensed update:

Oral surgeon took out those 2 broken teeth... for $1700. Two or three days later, the last one on the other side of my bottom jaw crumbled even more. Now I just live with ambesol soaked gauze on it because getting it out would be around $900 in my estimation (based on the cost of the 2) that I don't have. I owe my dad $1k for the originals.

The Spawn's car had a radiator fan issue right before she left for her week of vacation in Puerto Rico. The Bf's dad couldn't fix it, so my dad took it to the shop he uses & they fixed it.

The Spawn & The Bf got back on Tuesday night. Wednesday she was beat down but figured it was jetlag. Thursday she seemed to be having really bad allergies but just in case it was a cold, I wore a mask & kept my distance. Friday Dad starts to have similar symptoms, so they think summer cold. I continue the mask & distance gig, even though both act offended at different times about it.

I also made a boat load of cupcakes from scratch on Friday because I had a craving. We had lemon white chocolate cakes with blueberry lemon frosting and raspberry chocolate chip cakes with my chocolate whipped frosting that I added a bit of raspberry pureé to. They were amazing. There are multiple adults that don't like cakes or frosting that loved them & Key (my neighbor & new bff) asked if I'd make cupcakes when her youngest needs stuff like that for school & allow her to take credit for them. I obviously agreed.

Saturday evening I hear The Spawn & Dad coughing. Now, they had both had a cough for a couple days but this cough sounded extremely suspect. So I threw covid tests at their faces & lo and fucking behold, The Spawn brought a souvenir back from Puerto Rico in the form of motherfucking covid. She & Dad tested positive, while The Bf & I tested negative. I scrambled to find a place to go so I could... idk STAY ALIVE but it was late that night. So I left the next morning & have been @ Lou's ever since... except that it was his week to have all 3 of the kids (V- a 12 yr old boy, A- a 9 yr old girl, & H- a 4 yr old girl. The oldest are from his first marriage, the last is from his brief marriage to my ex bestie. Both women let them run wild & cave to their every demand, so they are feral.)

It is now friday. The Bf was TOLD to stay downstairs, only going up wearing a mask to bring supplies to the plague twins. But nobody fucking listens to me & now he has it. Additionally, the upstairs ac went out over there so all my shit got contaminated by them crashing downstairs.

(Side note: during this catastrophe, The Spawn called me griping about how many bad things have happened since she got back and how she's the *only* one suffering. I attempted to explain that no she isn't & she proceeded to scream at me that Dad & I are simply inconvenienced... you know, my dad who is in the high risk age group and has the same virus in the same un-airconditioned upstairs as her & me who is disabled & heavily relies on a specific environment I've cultivated for myself but has had to evacuate from her own home into a place of CONSTANT noise all because she was careless on vacation & brought home covid. Everything that's happened aside from the ac is the result of her own actions. I hung up on her and when she text 3 paragraphs of abuse at me, I muted her, let dad know what happened & that I'm done providing anything outside of a place to live. This isn't the first time she's been verbally abusive when things don't go the way she expects or she is faced with the consequences of her own actions but now she's legally an adult.)

Lou's kids got to have a week of Auntie [Dr. M]'s Boot Camp, where we learn to respect each other & our home. We don't yell in the house, we aren't mean to each other, we clean up after ourselves. It was quickly learned that I don't respond to demands, require manners, don't tolerate lying or bullying, don't give a fuck if a tantrum is thrown or a dirty look is given, & absolutely give out consequences for actions both good & bad. They are unaccustomed to a woman laying down the damned law or someone consistently correcting their behaviors (because Lou is outnumbered & beat tf down).

I have also been able to help him with the house & yard (which I will be able to accomplish more of now that the kids are back @ their moms'). When he kicked out my ex-bestie a little over a year ago, he was left with the house & while she was a student/stay at home mom for the bulk of their relationship, she's a borderline horder and frankly a slob, so he was left with that mess. He was understandably depressed & then by the time he got more mentally healthy, being a single dad of 3 every other week made it an overwhelming task to get out from under it. So I did what I do... came into the house in a whirlwind of efficient cleaning & organization. He gave permission for me to just go through & do whatever I felt needed doing. (The borderline hoarding situation resulted in us finding shit he didn't even know about, and him giving me a bunch of shit like an unopened double boiler. We discovered 3 crockpots and an instant pot that he didn't know about. The crock pots went into a bin for donation & I gave him a manual for the instant pot.) When I finished the kitchen, he cried. Now I'm house/dog sitting today & tomorrow, so I'm going to buckle down & do some hardcore cleaning junk to as much of the house as possible. While the kids were here, I helped them do their bedrooms.

He asked why I would do all this & the answer was simple: I enjoy it, I'm really good at it, and I understand how hard it is to get out from under it when it's that bad, so if I can get it clean & organized it will be easier to maintain.

Also I can't go home til they all test negative & have sanitized everything. Woo.

So there's my overall update. My life is dope.

[Been a long time since I've had to do this but don't reblog my shitshow. Don't steal it for your buzzfeed or bored panda bullshit. Both those sites need to die imo. ( ಠ ʖ̯ ಠ) ]

[lighthousegod]

This isn't miraculous related, just a vent. Using this site like reddit cause reddit sucks.

So like. Hear me out here.

I've had some shit friends before. Like, the gaslight, gatekeep, getawayfromme kind. And I ended that relationship, and the friend I have an issue with now is WORLDS better than the toxic ones I've had in the past. So trust me when I say I know this could be worse.

However,

Every time I talk to this friend I just get SO pissed off. She has PTSD, as well as OCD, and she just got taken off of some medication a few weeks ago, which has made things really hard for her. And I've been trying to be patient and be there for her. But I'm about to be at my mf limit y'all.

So the main issue is the complaints. Usually, I dont mind complaining, I'm pretty pessimistic myself so I do understand. It's hard not to. But god, every conversation we have is about how horrible her life is. Any time we talk, it always wraps back around to how "her brain hates her" and she can't catch a break. It's exhausting.

It's pretty clear that shes not lying, though. Something really is wrong. She has been missing class cause she has trouble making herself get out of bed, and her grades are steadily dropping. I know she doesn't want that and really beats herself up about it. And I have empathy for her, because I really do understand. I'm diagnosed with depression myself, and man, it takes me a LONG time to get myself ready in the mornings for that very reason. I take a lot of steps to make sure I have no other choice but to get out of bed. I even tried to share some of those strategies with her, like setting your alarm or phone far away from where you sleep so you have to at least get up to turn it off. Of course, she provided an excuse to why she cannot do that.

Now, more recently its gotten worse. I can't tell if I'm fed up or if she's gone downhill, or both. To preface, we spend a LOT of time with each other. We're both in college, and we're basically each others only friends. We knew each other in high school, so this isnt a new friendship. I could go on for another essay length post ab how I wish I would've forced myself to make friends at the beginning of the year instead of relying on her, but that's not what this is about.

So, she has OCD. She also has a lot of health issues, like allergies and asthma and all that. Pre-serum steve rogers comes to mind, except not that severe, of course. So, with these things combined, she's become a bit of a hypochondriac. Any time she has a cold, it's basically the end of the world. She'll convince herself she has a fever even if she hasn't taken her temperature, and hole herself up inside her room saying she's too sick to walk. Of course, when it all comes down to it, she usually doesn't have anything specific wrong with her, just a bad cold. Or maybe nothing at all. Now, I should preface that with this pandemic, I am certainly not saying she shouldn't be cautious. However, at this point, she has been tested and she is indeed negative for covid. She didn't even have a fever. And yet, I am still eating lunch alone, like I have been for days. I'm still receiving texts about how miserable she is for having to do her laundry or attend class in her state. I'm not her, so I can't say that this sickness is being blown out of proportion or not, but man is it exhausting anyway.

This situation where she leaves me to fend for myself for days, complaining the whole time, only to come back and have me by her side to keep her company, has become a trend. It's hard to let her wallow in her dorm alone like I do, because I'm usually so sick of sitting with my own thoughts that I take any opportunity to have some human interaction. If she's done self-isolating, I'm there. Even if I leave her company feeling worse than before. This is a weird issue to deal with as an introvert, so I'm navigating is as well as I can.

The last issue I have is the one I'm the most unsure about. This is because, as much as I've been complaining about her, she is actually a good friend to me most of the time. She is one of the only people that has ever let me talk to her about my problems, and recognized them as real problems instead of dramatics. For a while, I thought our relationship was strong, considering how many times we had talked about our respective traumas to each other. I truly can't thank her enough for letting me talk through some hard times over message with her.

But it's been a lot different lately. When I talk about my issues, it always circles back to hers. Her past is horrible, and the reason for her ptsd, so I completely support her talking about it openly instead of internalizing it. But man, she talks about it a LOT. I think its partly my fault, as I have trouble controlling my tone when talking about my mental health, past, etc. Its hard for me to be vulnerable like that, so I usually have a sort of neutral, emotionless tone. Even leaning towards the lighthearted side sometimes. Because of this, I assume she thinks its fine to talk about her problems too, because I dont sound upset. But when she brings up her issues, it does usually end up with her being sad or angry and me replying with a lot of "yeah, that's awful" and "man that really sucks, why would he do that to you." Its not that she DOESN'T listen to me, like I said, I do talk about my problems to her. It just feels disingenuous when the conversation always ends in us talking about her trauma, even if I started it by opening up about my own. And because I talk about mine some too, it feels wrong to tell her I'm not in a good place mentally to talk about hers. I'm really not in such a bad place that I cant handle her talking about her past, or even her present struggles. But it feels like mine are just- idk, overlooked? (Not to mention, any time I've confronted her about these things she apologizes profusely, but ends by telling me she's already internalized what I've said to her, and that she needs to talk to her therapist. Of course, she covers it with a lighthearted, self deprecating tone. But I still feel like shit. And somehow, she's the victim again.)

I've been struggling a lot lately, with a lot of similar issues (depression especially, although I have mental illnesses that she doesn't share, and vice versa. I realize our situations are not the same.) And I've even told her, or tried to. I know that people deal with depression in all different forms, but it's hard not to feel a bit of resentment when she complains about not being able to get out of bed. Like, god, I know. I really, really do. I have to scare myself awake with my alarm and force myself out of bed to turn it off. I have to wake up such a long time before my class starts because I get stalled with every step I take. So much of my mornings are spent staring at the floor in a loop of thoughts about how badly I want to get back in my bed and pretend I don't exist. But, lo and behold, I get to class. I cant afford to miss. And I know skipping class isn't good, it feels awful, I know that guilt well. But still, listening to her complain about not going to class feels like listening to someone complain about not being able to run into fire because they're not fireproof. No one's fucking fireproof. But still, here I am, covered in burns every day. Listening to someone whine about how horrible it is to watch everything burn from their window.

No, I don't feel the guilt of not trying. But that doesn't mean it's easy. That doesn't mean I come out unscathed.

[hanjisungs-bigtittyg0thgf]

Friend, the way I HAD TICKETS TO NEWARK but my friends and I decided not to go bc of the omicron spike. Would have been bad enough to get sick, but if I'd gotten my mom sick too I'd never forgive myself, and if I tested positive it would have caused a whole fucking Situation with me getting back to Korea for my job. Do I still regret it anyway? YEAH A LITTLE. It seems worth risking serious illness to have Seonghwa yell at me like that...

🎉

lord someone came to the atlanta show with rona anyways. i’m so sick of selfish people.

and i felt that. covid took a dear loved one from my family far too young and left her children orphans. i would feel horribly guilty if i got another family member sick. i live away from my family for school and i rung in the new year with the virus so i figured why the hell not but if i lived with a fragile family member, i would not have even gotten tickets.

also, if i had a nickel for every time i caught covid around a wintertime kpop concert, i’d have two nickels. which isn’t a lot, but it’s strange that it’s happened twice. i saw vav in atlanta in 2020 and literally days later covid was in the states and i’m 99% sure that’s what i ended up with because i got sick and everything i was tested for came back negative. “oh it’s just an upper respiratory infection and allergies” yeah no neither of those have EVER made me cough blood-

it was definitely worth the risk though bestie

[crazymommoments]

Before i start this i must tell everyone, We are unvaccinated and we choose to

hold that right 100 percent. That is not what this is about. So please save your

advice on shots and masks for yourself…..i respect your choice now please

respect ours

11-1-21-Covid 19 day ONE￾So I have decided to write this all down as it goes. I know everyone's experience

is different with it but mentally i believe this also helps.

So the story begins last night Oct 31st 2021, Hunter and myself had “colds”for a

couple days…. However, we both have pretty bad allergies and asthma and this

is a common time of year for it to hit us as we start to run the pellet stove and

furnace so nothing triggered in my mind it could be more than that.

First red flag- after trick or treating with the kids we decided to go to Mcdonalds

for a quick and easy supper, i was so happy to find the McRib back…. Well

needless to say i could not smell or taste it at all, no taste to fries, sandwich, or

drink….. Everyone else said it tasted good……

After this i had to test this no taste thing out- drank dill pickle juice, ate jalapenos

(anyone who knows me knows i can't even handle the hotness of a slim jim) and

absolutely nothing!!! I did feel a tingle with the jala but that was it.

Second red flag-It wasn't until late in the evening halloween night we got fevers,

just low grade (lower than 102) and Hunter said his breathing was not the

greatest…..so i said first thing in the morning we go get tested. Up until this point

I figured we would ride this one out at home so we don't have to cause a huge

fuss over every single person we had been in contact with the past 3 days

(football games, school, trick or treating). However, Hunter's breathing scared me

so I decided it was best he be seen.

Hunter, Isaac, and myself were all seen this morning and are positive.

Isaac had no symptoms but he had to come with us so I figured if one of us came

out positive then I would have him tested.

We still have appetites. I am the only one so far with no smell or taste. Everything

just tastes metallic to me.

Fevers come and go. Exhaustion comes and goes. Hunter and I are on steroids

as of now

Olivia got a fever about 1 pm so Cory loaded her up and away they went to be

tested as well

Note; Olivia would have had to be about of school until the 23rd if not positive.

Her quarantine didn't start until ours ended unless she popped a positive. So 23

days of missed school…I definitely don't understand the math behind all this and

honestly I don't believe they do either.

Anyways, she tested positive as well!!!

My husband on the other hand tested NEGATIVE!!! No clue how!

As i sit her tonight, my kids all medicated, and in bed…..my mother brain goes

into full worry

If their oxygens levels drop below 90, they have to be admitted to

hospital…...ALONE, not one single person can be with them…..yet i sit here and

have never felt more helpless….i can't do a damn thing to make them better, i

can't assure them it will be okay….all i can do is sit here and worry.

I now Listen to every noise they make, watch the dark circles and glassy eyes to

make sure they dont get worse. Check their oxygen and temps every few hours.

On top of the extra stress of being out of work, bills to pay, Christmas money

being spent to cover those bills and food/household items needed for the house,

our winter funds are spent to make sure everyone gets the right vitamins,

nutrition, and comfort during this trying time. Also all the peoples lives we have

interrupted with this mess makes me down right sad. I am truly sorry to all

affected by this.

As a parent I can handle the sickness as of this point….it's all the mental crap

that is coming with it that is breaking me.

I like to prepare and for this i was not prepared…..i thank the good Lord for my

mom, brenda farrar and my niece Madison farrar for going and getting us all the

food, medicine, household items. Mom made homemade chicken noodle soup

for us all so i didnt have to cook.

On top of all this my husband has to stay away from us all for 10 days as he is

the sole provider for this family…we can't afford for him to lose his income as

well. The stresses this covid puts on a family are indescribable to say the least

and there is not much help for the people. Unless you're of course an illegal

immigrant or unemployed…..but I won't drag that into this…..

nothing can stop it…...buy the extra toilet paper or can food if your income allows it once in a while…. Stock up on meds, household items, food…… set up online

to go grocery shopping….bill pay….and communicate.

Even just writing this, grammar errors and all, it has helped me this evening with

the load my mind was carrying. Also i have great hopes with no taste i may

continue to lose weight as everything tastes like i licked a sheet of metal.

And most importantly count your blessings and pray. Thank God for all the

blessings you do have. Let the people know how appreciated they are for helping

you through times like these.

And to top matters off I'm in facebook jail today so communication hasn't been

easy……

[knowerofuselessfacts]

If anyone wants to know what it's like to be in my brain, I'm mad at myself for missing classes because I woke up yesterday not feeling great and couldn't tell if the symptoms were allergies/cold/flu or covid, so I emailed my teachers and stayed home until a test comes back negative. But I don't feel as bad today so I'm mad I said anything, even though, logically, it's the best move because an overabundance of caution in a pandemic is a good thing.

[drake-the-incubus]

Post Note: This is long and I’m sorry.

I want to expand on what I mean but not use that post to do so.

Believe it or not, “x is a sign of y” isn’t as harmful as everyone is screaming about.

For example, my knees. I intermittently use a cane. Recently I haven’t had to use it- or I’ve forgotten it- but I have had days where I needed it.

I’ve had bad knee pain for a long ass time. Issues with pain in my legs in general.

But a lot of the time it would be a dull throb and I was fairly active as a kid and teen.

I also have a joint cracking problem. And I don’t mean I’m purposefully cracking my joints- though I do- I mean I’ve earned the nickname, “snap, crackle and pop” and “rice krispies”.

And my mom, when I was 12, went in for osteoarthritis and after years of pain finally found out she had a degenerating back that caused her back to create shards and she had a pinched cyatic nerve.

Forgive me as I’ve never seen this written down.

I’ve also had a problem with being incredibly sick as a child. Bronchitis to Bronchial Pneumonia almost yearly, and a couple of gland infections.

Do you know what mom tells me and I do?

Warning signs. Very common and not at all unusual warning signs.

I’m at risk for arthritis. In fact mom and I are both certain if it’s not there in my knees it’ll develop at some point.

In fact, earlier this year, I had back pain. God awful back pain. It ran down one leg at some point.

So I asked my mom because these were the symptoms for her issues. She told me to immediately see a doctor.

To most, that’s an overreaction. But it’s not.

I’ll round back to my sickly childhood.

I have a devil of a cough, I’ll hack up a lung if I have a fit. In fact if I’m ill I have the chance to seriously damage my throat- Halls my saviour.

I’ve had colds turn into serious medical issues because they don’t go away on their own, and what was considered a cold turned out to be an infection.

So now I’m hyper vigilant. A cold that last three days with medicine, I go to the doctor. If it’s just a cold, I’ll refuse their medicine, if it’s bronchitis, I’ve caught it early and now can avoid an emergency room visit.

Because of this sickly thing I’ve had for over two decades of my life- since I was an infant/toddler- I now have to tell people I live with, “hey if I’m sick too long tell me I’ll need to see a hospital”.

COVID came around and I literally got messages from multiple people worried I was going to die if I caught it, and I’m going to say, I’m terrified. I’ve been in the hospital multiple times due to illness, days away from being hospitalized.

The virus fucking terrified me. I’ve had more than ten scares of having it, with no idea what I should do, so I treated myself with care, waited for day three, when it didn’t come I was relieved.

I’ve nearly died twice to an allergic reaction, to this day, I’m deathly allergic to two things and I don’t know what they are.

I’m also allergic- but not even close to severe- to other things I can shrug off.

I’ve also had a negative general allergy test. It’s where I found out my blood type.

But I’ve had my throat slowly close up as I took a specific anti depressant. I didn’t notice until my tongue had started swelling in my mouth, that I had more itchy skin than usual and I was having breathing issues. I got told I was a few days out from actual death.

For mental health. I have very weird applications of symptoms.

I can tell if someone is angry or not, I can have genuine conversations with someone and notice minute details.

I’m also traumatized and was forced into recognizing emotions.

But I don’t know when to stop a conversation. I don’t know when to interpret someone’s polite way of ending something. I don’t know the social etiquette to not embarrass people. I can be sociable, but I hate people and I never seek them out myself.

I’m not the model someone looks to for an AFAB with autism.

My trans status really pushed the diagnosis.

But I do have the symptoms, they’re just not presenting in ways that make people scream autism- more like scream freak.

And as a teen I never knew I had it. But I found people who related to me outside of a psychological textbook who explained my issues and gave tips that worked for once.

I was Fourteen before it clicked in my parents were abusing me. That it wasn’t normal to stop and listen to make sure those were their footsteps. If they were coming to my room. How heavy? Is that anger?

I’d explain normal life things and get people telling me it wasn’t normal and I needed to be away from it. That the behaviour was terrifying.

That if my parents were threatening to beat me black and blue, I should be trying to get out.

Trauma causes memory issues? How would I know that as a teen going to the police and not being able to say anything other than, “they threaten me when I brush my teeth”.

A terrified seventeen year old, describing how they were punished and the police couldn’t take them seriously, as they sobbed and begged to not go back.

In a week I had to return because there was no where else to go.

I couldn’t tell the police office my parents threatened my life that night.

I couldn’t remember why I was convinced by my friends online to run away.

My teachers got mad: “Did you think of your grades, you’re graduating this year”

Not even thinking about how I was suffering so much I got sent to the councillor- and then dumped- multiple times for suicidal ideation and the absolute terror I had in ever speaking of my issues.

It took meeting someone who was traumatized to learn I had panic attacks.

“Go take Your medication they give you for anxiety, you’re having a panic attack”

I’ve had them since I was a child and it took frantically talking in a chat room to figure it out.

I got half my diagnoses from the people around me before medically getting them. And that’s not a joke.

I had abnormally painful periods for my entire childhood, and it took a friend telling me it was probably bad I needed my mom’s painkillers for her back sometimes to even exist.

And do you know what, extremely painful periods is a sign for something really bad. And about 1/3 of afabs have that experience.

It’s considered normal. And yet it can lead to a deadly disease if you’re not careful.

A painful boob can be breast cancer.

A cough and fever could be COVID.

People relatively will explain their experiences in a way that people see is normal.

Making it Hard to actually convey how these experiences are normal for US but they’re not normal.

“Haha I Just found out reading a lot as a kid was a sign of PTSD” isn’t someone taking the piss abt PTSD, it’s a common experience due to escape fantasies. I know a lot of people, most who hate reading now, that explained how they’d read for hours as a child to get out of life, sometimes pretending to be something better.

And so in good conscience, I can’t say that post is great.

TDLR; The post that insinuates “x is a sign of y” comes off as ableist, as my lived experiences I know where this comes from.

Sometimes minor things can be a sign of something major and ignoring it doesn’t help.

Physical and Mental health are hard to convey, and most of the time someone doesn’t have the language or forethought to in depth describe their experiences.

[thefuzzydarkness]

(Hello! So I've had this horrible summer cold for about a week now and I thought it might be interesting to tell you guys my experience in a dramatized format. Also since this particular story is about a funeral I'm going to leave any details about the person who passed away or basically just anything sad out of the story to be respectful. Also I should mention that both my mother and I were covid tested and they came back negative so my family isn't in any danger thankfully. Anyway hope you like this and if you do I'll post more!)

The Funeral

I woke up the sound of my alarm clock blaring and groaned. Shit the funerals this morning. I rolled out of bed and began digging through my clothes to find something to wear, sniffling and rubbing my nose hard. I was super stopped up and my throat was starting to burn. I looked down at my phone and contemplated texting my family and telling them I couldn't make it but then I brushed the idea aside. I wasn't going to let some allergies stop me from supporting my family even if I did feel pretty awful. I got dressed, slapped some makeup on, and started the drive down. As my GPS guided me towards the church my nose started to run like a faucet. I opened my center console and grabbed some fast food napkins out. I blew my nose but it didn't seem to do anything but make me a bit dizzy. I was so confused. I never get bad allergies around this time of year. My allergies are genuinely very predictable. At the beginning of March, when these white flowered trees bloom everywhere, I'm an absolute mess for about two weeks. I've also got grass allergies but that usually only bothers me when grass is being mowed. I shrugged it off and tried to focus on driving. It felt like it took forever to get there. My GPS went on the fritz and tried to tell me the church was in the middle of an empty field. Finally I saw my aunt's car in a parking lot and turned in. I was already about ten minutes late. I looked down to silence my phone and saw that my dad had texted me. My mom was sick and they couldn't make it. That didn't surprise me. She'd recently had surgery and hadn't been feeling too well in general. I silenced my phone and walked into the church. I sat in an empty back pew trying not to draw attention to myself. Pulling my cardigan around me I shivered a bit. I will never understand why they have to keep these places so cold. I listened as people told stories about the wonderful man who had sadly passed away. I tried to stay focused but my nose had other ideas. "Hgnxxt hhgnxxt" I stifled two sneezes in my sleeve. Thankfully no one noticed. I should've grabbed some of those napkins out of the car but I didn't. I settled for a small sniffle and refocused. After everyone had finished speaking the church staff directed us outside to begin heading to the cemetery. I went to stand by my grandfather (who I call Papa) hoping I wouldn't have to talk too much as my throat was really beginning to ache. I gave Papa a hug and stood there leaning my head on his shoulder. He asked me how I was and I said I wasn't too bad. I put my head back down and he touched my face. "You're a little warm." I shrugged. I told him it was probably nothing and he nodded. My Grana came walking out of the church and I hugged her. She asked me where my mother was and I told her she was sick but she sent her love. We walked together into the parking lot and got into our cars preparing for the funeral procession. I sighed as I fell into the driver's seat waiting to pull out. I quickly grabbed another napkin "Hih'chu Hhitchuu" I groaned and rubbed my temples. I was starting to get a headache. The procession started to move and in what now seems like a blur of driving and sniffling we arrived at the cemetery. I walked over to where my family was gathered and stood in the back. We huddled close together, comforting each other, holding hands, and sharing stories to make each other laugh. We stood there taking each other in until the burial was finished and slowly parted and made our way back to our cars. We decided to meet up at a diner and even though I probably should've gone home I decided to go. I was starving and it was right down the street. Throughout lunch I blew my nose what felt like a dozen times and developed a bit of a cough. I said my goodbyes and left as everyone else finished up. As I was on the way home I decided to call my mom and check up on her. I asked her how she was feeling and she told me she had a sore throat and couldn't stop sneezing. I paused in surprise. I had expected her to say something about stomach problems or the like. That's when it clicked.

I'd hung out with my mom all last week when she was in town and now we both felt like shit. I wasn't having "mystery allergies" I was sick. I told my mom to feel better and decided not to mention it. I didn't want her to feel any worse than she already did. I got off the phone and let out a long sigh. This was going to be a long week.

[jade-island-lives]

Here’s What’s Going On: Health Stuff And Moving Forward

Okay, so I’ve been trying to keep this quiet for some time, but seeing as it’s only gotten worse in recent times, I cannot ignore what has been happening to me, because it has been affecting my school work, my writing, and my daily life. to the point where I can do very little of anything.

So, I’ve been suffering from what I believed was seasonal allergies for an entire year. I know, once it starts to last longer than a season, it doesn’t really count as seasonal allergies. 

But for the past year or so, I have been dealing with constant, and I mean constant allergies. I’m talking about, puffy red swollen itchy eyes, constant stuffy nose that doesn’t seem to clear up at all, constant fatigue, blocked ears, having trouble breathing and needing my inhaler constantly. And wearing a mask at work makes it worsen, I’ll say that much. But I still wear it because I can’t afford to get sick on top of this and if I do have something, I would never want anyone to get sick from me.

I can’t even begin to describe to you how miserable I am and have been. I’m constantly not well, and writing at the end of the day has become an absolute road block due to this. Studying has become a mountain to scale and I have been failing test after test after test due to my fatigue and sickness. 

I have gotten a covid test, and it came back negative so there’s no worry there. But it got worse on Christmas, where my family all ended up getting sick with a nasty form of a respiratory infection. Ever since I recovered, my taste and sense of smell has been off. Again, it was believed by doctors that it’s not Covid, rather, allergies. 

As a result, I have been trying many multiple medications, nasal sprays and even nasal washes, I have taken it upon myself to clean my living space spotless and confine myself to that room. The last thing to change is my eating habits, which are poor. But I have always struggled with what I eat, always and that will always be a battle.

I even bought a humidifier, and made it a point to get as much fresh air as I can into my room. It’s winter and there’s no lilacs or ragweed growing yet. I’m washing sheets more frequently and will be looking into getting hypoallergenic soaps. I have pets and have always been allergic to dander, but I keep them out of my room at all times, and I’ll be looking into getting air circulation in my room. 

But I have periods where the symptoms are minor, and times where the symptoms are HORRIBLE. Sometimes I’ll wake up in the middle of the night, eyes scratchy, nose stuffy, constantly sneezing, and it takes forever to go back to sleep. 

I’ve been trying to keep up with my school work, but I’m failing miserably. And I haven’t worked on any of my major WIPs in 2 weeks or so, 

I’m going to the allergy clinic next Thursday for a consultation. Until I can figure out what’s wrong with me, so I can feel better and take care of myself. I wouldn’t expect much from me. I’m sorry, but I’m really suffering here. Today, I had a meltdown because of how awful I feel and I barely passed my latest exam with a low grade. I feel so bad, like nothing is ever going to be okay again. Like I’m never going to feel better and be stuck this way forever. 

Thank you for understanding, I’ll come back as soon as I can

[exeggcute]

glad to know you are mostly recovered from covid! if i may ask, could you describe how where your symptoms or at what pace you got them? the information i've got from both medical / govermental sources in my country is contradictory at times. also, what would you recommend drinking if i found myself to be with covid?

first off: WATER!!! drink water!!! I mean you can probably drink whatever as long as it’s moderately healthy and you’re staying hydrated (my drink of choice while sick is red gatorade. it has to be red or it doesn’t work though) but water is always a safe bet

also I’m happy to share my experience, just know that (1) I am not a doctor, just a professional Sick Person and (2) I never officially got tested thanks to a shortage of coronavirus tests in my area, but I’m pretty damn sure my symptoms were aligned with covid-19, so take that as you will

the first thing I noticed was a sore throat... but I have sore throats allll the time because of my other health issues, so I didn’t think much of it. I did start to notice my sore throat was getting better (from a previous mystery illness that knocked me out for a few days, and which I initially thought was strep but was probably just a bad cold) before suddenly getting bad again. I also had a day where my sore throat was especially pronounced and I had that Really Tired Feeling you get when you’re sick. I guess we can call that day one, but at this point I definitely didn’t think I had corona

that night I noticed some chest tightness, which I initially wrote off as an anxiety attack (and considering my extremely anxious personality and the fact that we were battening down the hatches for a pandemic, that seemed like a fair assumption) but using my inhaler didn’t help--in fact, it made the pain worse! but it did pass eventually, more or less, and I forgot about it

(side note here that if you think you have corona, do NOT use your albuterol inhaler or any kind of steroid inhaler unless you’re having a legit asthma attack with wheezing and all the works. using your inhaler can make the corona symptoms worse, but obviously if you need to use it then it’s important to keep using it. consult your doctor. also another similar note: if you think you have it, stay away from most NSAIDs if you can, as those can also make things worse. tylenol is okay though as long as you’re careful about the dosage--not as a corona thing, you just always need to be careful with tylenol dosage. and it’ll help keep your fever down, which is important!)

then over the next day or two I noticed the chest pain flare-ups but wrote those off as well. they were short-lived and mainly seemed to happen at night, but the inhaler always made them worse. around this time I also started experiencing some general GI upset for a few days (not to get too into that...), but I have a very touchy digestive track and was taking antibiotics at the same for other unrelated reasons, so I was like “well it’s probably nothing” but was starting to get worried.

then about five days later, the chest tightness really made itself present. like, it lasted all day and was constant. I was concerned but not immediately freaking out, and it was really windy that day so I kind of chalked it up to allergies, but as a very allergic person I’ve never had chest tightness like that from allergies (and my other allergic symptoms have improved considerably since I started allergy shots, so it would be weird to have a new symptom crop up out of nowhere like that).

then the next day, and the next day, the tightness wasn’t going away. this was clearly not allergies. I started to seriously think about corona tests, and I even called my primary care doctor, but she was extremely dismissive (all she did was call in a prescription for an old allergy drug that never even worked for me in the first place) and it was downright impossible to get tested. I was freaked out, but not entirely sure.

it’s about day seven at this point, and the chest tightness is in full swing. when I first wake up, the pain isn’t really present, but after about an hour of wakefulness my chest starts to get tight, congested, and kind of has that rattle-y feeling when it’s full of mucus and crap from the postnasal drip. not much congestion otherwise, but I’m so hopped up on antihistamines at all times that I don’t really get congested in general. the best way I can describe the chest tightness is that it feels like when I exert myself and my asthma makes my chest seize up and it’s hard to catch my breath (aka every single PE class I was ever forced to take as a kid), but my inhaler doesn’t do shit. my throat is still hurting pretty bad too and I feel vaguely fevery, but I don’t have a working thermometer at home. overall I just feel shitty, like that feeling you have when you know you’re sick (and I get sick a lot so I’m pretty well-versed in that lol). for quarantine purposes, this is the day I’ve been counting as the “first day” of having obvious corona symptoms, but it was really predated by the things I described above.

several days pass like this, I keep trying to get tested and call all sorts of places but it’s all dead ends. I also develop a slight cough, which mostly comes in bursts or when I speak/eat. by day twelve I manage to get a primary care appointment, and they do an EKG to make sure it’s not cardiac pain (the EKG came back fine) and a throat swab to see if it’s something bacterial (it’s not). they do confirm I’m running a slight fever, although my body temperature is usually so low that even a fever of 99 is high for me. my primary care doc basically tells me to fuck off and stay home, which I was already planning on doing. she also didn’t even wear a mask or gloves to look into my throat, despite the fact that all the other nurses in the practice were wearing masks and gloves when they interacted with patients... so I’m not exactly full of confidence in her judgement here.

the night of day thirteen, the day after seeing my doctor, I have a night where I can’t sleep because my airway feels restricted (both in my chest and my actual throat being swollen from pain). I used my inhaler, like a fool, and when the inhaler didn’t help the first time I tried using it two more times. big mistake! I ended up lying awake gasping for air, taking huge gulps just to feel like I was getting the teeniest bit of oxygen, and feeling stabbing pain when I took these deep breaths. I was too afraid to sleep and almost made my girlfriend drive me to the ER but I hate going to the ER so instead I just tried to calm down until I got exhausted enough to fall asleep around dawn. I also kept alternating between sweating buckets and shivering to death, no matter how I kept adjusting the temperature and my blankets, so I assume I was having a crazy fever that night.

the next day, roughly day fourteen, I decided to suck it up and go to the ER to get a chest x-ray. they said my x-ray looked fine, which was encouraging (hopefully no permanent lung damage there), and they took a flu swab and a strep swab just to rule those out (both negative, of course). at least two other people were there with me in the ER complaining of similar symptoms, but they didn’t have any tests for us so the doctor just told me to go home, act as if I had it, and keep taking tylenol and drinking water. this doctor is also the one who told me to stop using my inhaler--and the fact that my inhaler kept making the pain worse is one of the things that really tips me off here that I probably had it.

things are pretty much uneventful for the next week: still having a tight chest, a fever that seems to come and go, sore throat, cough. no more crazy attacks like that one night.

by day nineteen (yesterday) I start to notice a bit of improvement in my chest pain. it’s not gone, but it’s not as bad and I’ll have slight reprieves from the tightness. today is day twenty (more or less, my numbers are a little rough here) and I actually felt okay most of the day. by the evening the tightness returned and I’m still coughing every now and then, but far less often. I think the fever is gone and my throat doesn’t hurt too bad, either! I’m well past the point of being contagious, so I actually went to the grocery store today and got a few things. I’m not totally out of the woods yet, but I think (knock on fucking wood) the worst has passed.

anyway, I hope my anecdote is helpful for you, and I hope you stay safe and healthy!

[dya-d]

Not reylo, but - today my husband got the results of his covid test back and it was positive. We’ve both been feeling a little off for about a week now (like having allergies or a mild cold), and on Monday he lost his sense of smell and taste and started having body aches, so he got tested. When we got his results today, I went and got tested too. Today I feel way worse than the last few days too (in addition to cold-y symptoms, I have a headache, small fever (100*), and my lungs are sore like when my asthma is acting up), and I don’t know if it’s psychosomatic due to stress/anxiety, or if it’s because I’m sick too. Imagine if my test comes back negative? And I just stressed myself out this. much?

I’m frustrated because we only left home for essential things. We always wore masks and used hand sanitizer. Our friends have taken trips, and gone out with friends, and they’re fine...it’s unfair.

My father-in-law had covid a month or so ago. He was in Mexico when he got it, and was hospitalized and put on a ventilator. He’s better now and is back home in the states regaining his strength. For it to hit twice, so close to home, just sucks. And I am worried about myself. All I can do is wait for my test results and take care of myself.

I’ve been working remotely for a while now, but I think tomorrow I want to talk to the team about taking some time off from work. It’s bad timing because I don’t know how they will cobble together support, but I need to put myself and my hubby first right now. 

I just reblogged a post about this, but thanks to various fic writers for helping me get through this day, and this whole pandemic so far. @kylotrashforever, thank you in particular for i’ve got you (under my skin), and @earstwo for for what it's worth (it was worth all the while), for getting me through today in particular and writing two of my most most most favorite fics!

Anyway, thanks for letting me vent a lil bit friends. <3 Love you all!