#all this within the same like 20 minute time span

[oflgtfol]

my mom acts like i have such extreme mood changes when im pmsing like as if i become the biggest meanest bitch in town meanwhile in actuality the only mood problems i have when im pmsing is that i cry over everything

[pocket-watcher]

“It’s interesting, with a power set so vast you must have some weakness just as broad to balance you out.” The scientist said as they poked and prodded you.

You laughed nervously. “What? No. That’s ridiculous. I don’t have any weaknesses.”

And you believed that, of course. Fire resistance, high pain thresholds, and you no longer had your fear of heights! Turns out saving people 20 stories up really helps with exposure therapy!

“Biologically speaking, everything has a weakness. Predators have blind spots, they’re scared of noise, they can’t conceal their blood like prey can. So… what’s your weakness?” The scientist mused once more, not asking you specifically but more as if asking the universe.

You took a deep breath and tried not to panic. This was one of the top scientists in the country, here to help you, not to take you down.

“Are you okay?” They asked, innocently.

Too innocent.

They looked up as you looked down. Nose to nose.

Your head shot upwards to avoid their stare.

“Yeah! I-I’m fine. Just… you know…” You rocked your head slightly trying to think of another topic to talk about. “So… what do you think my weakness is?”

Their eyes lit up.

In a flash they rounded up a box and began showing your data.

Despite your enhanced intelligence your brain couldn’t keep up with the speed at which they spoke.

“-and if you look at this graph here, you’ll find what’s really interesting is the activity in your prefrontal cortex spikes! At the same time your right medial temporal lobe starts working overtime, like a forceful relaxant. It’s like somehow a specific combination of lights and patterns overrides your brain like a giant helping of melatonin!”

Um.

“What?”

They blinked at you. “Aha… got a little excited there. Maybe a demonstration would help?”

You began to agree as they span you into a seat and wheeled you through the lab.

Dear god these scientists were fearless, you thought.

When you came to a stop you were hooked up to several wires, a heart-rate monitor, some strange-looking device holding your head in place (and possibly scanning it too?) and your arms pinned down… not that those restraints could do much. You’d bench pressed a 747 before lunch.

“Okay. So, I want you to listen to the voice coming out of the speakers and to watch the screen. Okay?”

You nodded, still unsure, but that unsureness seemed to disappear instantly once the screen began flashing.

The colours were too fast for you to register. The voice was repeating words that both you couldn’t understand but also rewrote your brain.

You felt your mouth hang open and your body go limp. You were vulnerable, incapacitated, all within a single minute of this scientist hooking you up to the machine.

“It’s just as I thought! How do you feel?” They asked, lifting your limp wrist and dropping it down before scribbling more notes.

You couldn’t have answered even if you wanted to.

They checked your pupils for responses and studied the data, whilst you sat there staring at the screen. Listening to the constant flow of unintelligible words.

“Okay! We should probably get you outta there, huh?” They said as they flipped the machine off.

It took you a while to fully come to your senses.

“…What was that?” You asked, incredulously.

“That was your weakness. Theorised, and now proven.”

You didn’t know what to do. You’d never been made to feel so small. So at the mercy of someone else.

“You had no right.”

You stopped. The safety of the world was at stake. If this information fell into the wrong hands…

“Woah there, we’re the only ones here! I won’t tell anyone. I promise…”

You felt an “if” coming.

“If you let me run more tests like that? We can work together, see if we can find a way for you to resist it.” The scientist smiled kindly.

You felt scared for the first time in a long time. Scared of what someone could make you do. How they could make you feel.

“Fine. If that’s the price to keep you from talking, we can run more tests.” You settled.

“Great! I promise you won’t regret it!” The scientist waved you out of the room. Once you were out of earshot they typed out a message:

It worked just as you said it would. I’ll start working on the conditioning pronto. You sure I shouldn’t have tried turning them now?

A phone pinged back a moment later:

No… slow and steady wins the race my friend. Great work.

Somewhere, a villain smiled at her phone, dreaming of a subservient hero.

[missmarveledsblog]

It's never the end only a new beginning ( joel miller x reader)

summary : maria and the doctor show up , our girl is in a bad way but it doesn't stop joel clinging to a new feeling of hope and a chance to do what he should of done long ago

warnings: angst , fluffy fluff

continuation of the last part : is it the end ?

How could the world do this , how could it give him this woman and now he held her in his arms , limp and cold he felt like it was a cruel joke . This strong woman who only just wanted to live a  peaceful life and help them . He had to watch another person he loved slip away before he even got the chance to fully have her. Joel couldn’t hear anything , he couldn’t hear the chaos just outside the doors of the abandoned warehouse , he couldn’t hear tommy sniffled trying not to break down at sight of his friend , he also couldn’t hear the sound of maria calling out to them or tommy’s calls back in reply. Everything was quiet   all his senses were on her . he told her he’d always be there so even if it meant so she wasn’t alone in the end as much as it broke his heart he was there. 

He almost bit tommy head off and the docs when they took him away  till he said there was a light pulse but they need to move her , joel never felt something like the feeling growing within him , not in such a long time it was so foreign  but in this moment in time, it was was welcome it was hope. A chance to not let it go to waste they moved her to the truck doc used if someone got hurt on patrol. The  whole time he held her , listened and followed each instruction that was thrown his way. Anything joel miller could do in his power to strengthen that hope that was building in his soul he did. Tommy and maria both shared worried glances it didn’t look good  , it hadn’t looked good the moment she fell to that damned floor . yet in all the madness she was so proud to face the demon of her past to stand up to him . that tired smile on her face before her eyes closed would be in the star of Joel's dreams no matter what the outcome was to happen . 

The drive maybe was  , no it was definitely the longest 20 minutes of his life. Each second felt like an hour , the battle against time it’s self to get her back to the clinic back where doc could do his time properly being an universal donor too meant fully joel could help give blood if needed , hell he’d give anything to give his life for hers if he could in that moment . when they saw the gates of jackson well he’s never been so happy to see them in his life  they drove straight to the clinic where they had the gurney waiting ready to talk her in the whole town watched her pale lifeless limp body being wheeled in and the door closing with a thud . although at first she never minded to be part of the town more just a shell of a person that was there to live, do the job she was giving well she slowly became one of them , slowly she indoctrinated into the community that now stood hoping they weren’t going to lose one of their own .  she was wheeled into the back room  as joel sat letting the docs apprentice take the blood from his arm before heading into the back room as he sat waiting ,  he even prayed something he had never done in such a long time and yet he sat and prayed like it was part of his daily routine  , that he's been doing it all his Life . He would do anything that would help in any instance that meant she was ok. He felt a pair of Eyes on his frame , he knew exactly who Those eyes were . He couldn't turn if he did  weak or not  he would kill the man that betrayed Them , betrayed her . Joel could understand why mark done it and he could sympathize with the man losing his family but yet same time all that sympathy and understanding was  washed out when joel blinked , cause even in such a short span of time his eyes closed all he could see was y/n in pain , almost dead in his arms.  Happiness was a rarity and that could be gone forever as hypocritical as it would seem joel could not be on the mans side at this very moment but if he could he would be his end . 

It must of been hours by the time he was woken , he didn’t even realize   he had gone asleep til the doc shook him awake and he’d seen the sun beginning to rise  signaling the new day. The doc looked completely exhausted and yet  joel couldn’t care less in his selfish need to know , to know  how she was  , if she was. 

“ she stable it was up and down all night but we were able to stop the bleeding , she is lucky  and by lucky i mean a divine miracle this woman is still a live i have not seen a fighter like her in such a long time”  the tired smile upon the elderly mans face spoke volumes  to his shock he felt himself being pulled into a hug something the man would of put down to his tired mind playing tricks on him to think  joel giving physical Affection and yet here he was . “ you can see her  , she still out cold might be a while before she wakes up” the elderly man nodded heading to the stair of clinic  so he could rest for a little bit . 

When he walked looking at the outdated Equipment and wires sticking out of her the iv hanging up ment it was bad to us such scarce supplies . He stood looking both afraid and yet dying to touch her , hands twitching at his sides when He pulled the chair to her side of the bed . He watched as her chest had steady rise and fall , how serine and peaceful she looked laid out in the bed . she was so pale  yet so lifeless even in all that she looked beautiful almost ethereal like an angel had come straight into his life . this quiet woman who did her own thing then started opening up getting to know them all  , then she finally started getting  out of the protective shell she built around herself .  she was a storm to be reckon with everything in life that should of torn her down didn’t  and she got back , she was born into a shirt storm and somehow she was like a rainbow  making it less dull .  all she had to do was smile and instantly his day felt so much better and it scared the shit out of him but it scared him more never seeing the smile again. She was something he never expected , someone he never thought he deserved but like everything else she made him think different made him believe he could be happy with out doing much but just existing. She was something spectacular more than she really knew and he was going to make sure when she was better he was going to make sure she knew that whether  she share the same feeling as him or not .  

He stayed by her side  the whole days and nights she was there ,  with ellie bringing his meals to him and spare clothe so he could change even staying by y/n side while he went to get changed .    he watched as the doctor check her over and every time the nurse done literally anything .  He talked about everything and anything hoping she could hear him , know she wasn’t alone , letting her know he meant his words she was never going to feel alone again .  it was little at first  felt like his mind was playing tricks on him as he was dosing off til he felt it again that weak squeeze in on his finger making him shoot up , like a cold water waking him completely when he look to see she was beginning to stir with a groan and moan . her eye trying to open but the sting of the light kept them closed for a little before they slow opened more and more . the confusion on her face was almost the most adorable thing he had seen if he wasn’t so happy in that moment finally once his prayer where answer by divine miracle she was a wake  and alive. 

“ joel?” she croaked almost unbelieving she was in the land of the living she was it was it. She was so sure  once her eyes closed in that warehouse that she wasn’t going to make it out and here she was laying in the clinic back in jackson with joel miller sitting at her side . he was smiling  , he looked so happy yet so tired looked like he’d barely slept. “Joel?” she asked again trying to move only to feel the pain shoot at her side for the sudden action.

“ woah easy darling slowly” he rushed to help her sit up , handling her with such gentle and loving touch. “ you scared me little shit don’t do that again” he grumbled putting the blanket on her more  making sure she was comfortable hell he was thinking of taking the ones off mark if she needed them . 

“ i don’t have any other husbands so i think the possibility of me doing this again are low” she smiled weakly ignoring the look joel was giving her . 

“ not what i meant also you aint funny , i almost lost you “ he held her hand tightly in his , she didn't miss  the slight waver in his voice and how raw his words were . the way he was looking at her all the emotion she felt through the simple action she leaned over and kissed his chest hiding the pain she was in from doing such before laying back against the pillow. 

“ can’t kill a good thing… ok last joke” she laughed making his face soften . “ how the hell am i still alive” she asked . 

“ by a miracle or stubbornness either way we’re grateful your still here little missy” doc called walking over checking her over. “  you gave us a scare but like a common pattern lately being full of surprise” he smiled . “ maybe i can have my clinic back … oh not you dear   it him watching me like a damned hawk” he chuckled . 

“ i ain’t watching you like a hawk” joel flushed  crossing his arms pretending that the docs words weren’t the absolute truth. 

“ yeah i think your lying doc his eyes not too good with age” she smirked as joel glared at her playfully. “I’m joking… a little bit ” she giggled loudly again instant turning him into mush .  her laughter , her smile they could instantly melt his frowns and glares away  with the melody and warmth that came along .

“ yeah yeah  seems as she definitely ok with all these so called jokes” joel muttered only for her turn to narrow her eyes at him and cross her arms although she never once let go his hand . she honestly was scared to like if she did it would of been a dream . that same fear  of thinking that joel was going to magically disappear , she had that feeling in the warehouse when she thought it was her end , frankly she would fully admit never seeing joel miller would be her personal hell. She couldn’t believe once in her life luck was on her  side and her she was a second chance to live life without a worry of the monster plaguing her in the back of her mind and she had joel in her life once more. He didn’t know how much she owed him since their first patrol to everything that happened after. He gave her life before he was fully ingrained in her life all she did was simply survive day to day now well before she almost died she was living  opening herself to people again , having a family again whether she could admit to that out loud  or not but ever since joel miller came into her life she’s been living every day since. 

“ y/n ?” the doc looked at her seemly waiting on some sort of response she was too deep in though to even know what she was to respond to . 

“ doc was saying you could go home when your up to it although it on strict bedrest” joel said softly seeing the confusion written all over her face. “ she’ll be staying at ours so we can help her , just let me know when you wanna check her over and i’ll have her here” joel easily answered for her barely even let her think of away to get out of the whole thing maybe he was running before he could walk but fuck it anyway he could have her close was fine by him .

“Well how  am i supposed to get to you house giving i can’t even move in this bed” she mused only  for joel to stand a stick his hand under her legs and the other on her back lifting her up in his arms making her yelp at the suddenly tug in her arm.

“ patience would do you world of good” doc gruffed taking the IV from her arm as the older man apologized although he was behaving like a love struck teenager as he carried her out of the room taking the blanket off the bed wrapping it around her and out of the clinic before her eyes could even see mark still laying in the bed. He was carrying her home , his home but hopefully if he didn’t screw up maybe her home some day .  she smiled tiredly waving to people who both looked stunned and yet so happy to see her alive and somewhat well even if joel wasn’t giving into stopping he was  moving fast to get her out of the cold and into the comfort of home. The minute the door opened her head saw the two girls pull apart at the sudden intrusion . both standing on their feet making it like they weren’t doing anything although the shit eating grin on y/n face told ellie she was definitely caught not that the teenage could even care seeing her friend alive and awake and a little confused when joel continue walking heading up the stair making a b line to his room as they followed. 

“ jesus miller calm your ass” she snorted as joel put the blankets over her and heading out the room as the girl walked in. “ guess i’m staying here til i’m all healed up” she looked up only for ellie to hug her tightly , she could feel the wet tears soak into her shoulder making her wrapped her arms tighter around the girl . “ hey i’m ok” she said only for dina do join now both crying holding her on the bed and y/n to join in .  “ i’m not leaving ok can’t get rid of me” she sniffled lift both girls faces up to look at her . she wiped their tears away. 

“ i thought i was never going to see you again” ellie finally said . “ i can’t lose more family” she added .

“ your not going to i’m like a cat with shit ton of lives like a magic cat” she wiped her own tears as they laughed. “  your kinda stuck with me” she winked as joel walked by into the room handing her a cup of water and some tissues as they each took one . 

“ least now he won’t be so much of a grump too i think he was driving doc crazy over there ,  i’m pretty sure that nurse was going to cry too” ellie teased and joel shoved her a little trying  to shut her up only making the girls laugh more. “ dare they hurt the woman he loved even if she was unconscious” she laughed as y/n stopped her eye widened at the girls words as dina hit ellie arm making her realis what she just said . “ on that note i  think tommy told asked me to do something so good to see you live and kicking” she almost left a shadow outline with how fast she moved out of the room as dina gave them a quick goodbye before following just as fast. 

“ joel?” she looked up  at the man not sure of what else to  truly . the adoration she felt and love she felt there was a chance of it being reciprocated which made her definitely start to question if she was truly alive. She felt the dip in the bed and his hand on her almost afraid to look up incase he would tell her he loved her like a friend or worse his daughter or something giving the gap in their ages. Then she felt his other hand under her chin lifting her head to look at him . 

“ not way i was hoping it would be said, actually i would of rather been the one to say it but darling ellie isn’t lying i think i was that clinics worse nightmare these last few days , i surprised i wasn’t gonna be kicked out but even then i wouldn’t have left” he smiled  those brown eyes filled with something she only seen her mother looking at her father . that pure unfiltered raw love she only dreamed of and yet here it was the reality real time she could see it . “that first patrol hell even before then you had me hook if im truly honest but that first patrol was when i knew it for sure  and every day after it just grew to point i thought it could grow anymore and it did , when i thought you died shit i died too life just didn’t make sense if you weren’t in it , i didn’t think i of all people would get a chance to feel this kind of love and thats what it i am so in love with your darling” it was like a dam broke and every word bursting and flowing free as she let it surround her and drowned in ever syllable .

“ when i was little girl my mama told me of stories , the princess trapped in a tower and knight coming to her rescue  , him being so in love with her that he would risk his own life i thought i felt that before but i don’t think i love you joel” she said softly as his head fell . “ i never had to think that i loved you because i know i love you ,  i’ve always known and weirdly enough i wasn’t afraid to die because it was end of my life i was scared because i was…” she said only for rest of what she had to say cut off by joel’s lips crashing on her instantly with no hesitation she kissed him back . it was like everything she was searching for was all found there and then. Fireworks , sunshine and rainbows feeling that stirred within her , feeling alone to now completely loved it was beyond her wildest dreams .  she could feel the fire burning in her lungs screaming for air and yet she felt herself fighting it because she need him more til he pulled back holding her face in his hand he rested his forehead against her. Their eyes locked in some sort of bubble they didn’t hear the front door open nor the noise of the footsteps on the stairs . 

“ well i was checking to see if the little lady was ok but i guess she is” that smirk filled voice when they looked up to see tommy and maria standing looking at the both of them .  “ hey look she got some color to her cheek but then again so does my big brother” tommy laughed . 

“ good to see you too tommy” she squeaked out only for her to cough to try fix her voice.

“ i am beyond happy to see this but she aint in any condition to be doing this big brother” he snorted only barely dodging the pillow heading towards him . “ jokes aside it’s good to see you kiddo” he smiled genuinely .

“ yeah means he’ll stop crying” maria smirked . “ sorry both of em crying” she added ignoring how both brothers were looking at her or how she pushed joel out of the way to hug her.

“ you know what i’m man enough to admit it , i thought i lost one of my good friend , my best friend i already called it so sorry sweetheart” tommy smiled, hugging her next.  

“ i suppose i could have a worse best friend i’m glad i ain't dead though  , live irony of finally finding family only for it to be taken from me , maybe the universe ain’t such a cruel bitch like i thought it was plus when i’m better i know theres another person in town that needs me” she said finally looking at maria. “ you think maura’s ok to watch charlie til i’m better” she asked. 

“ wait really?” she asked excitedly . 

“ yeah hell i’m more sure now then i was before even if i was going to say yes either way” y/n nodded. 

“ we can squeezed em in here , i’m sure ellie won’t mind sharing her room” joel smiled kissing her head.

“ it’s only til i’m better” she rested her head on his chest not wanting his touch to leave even if it was for a second . 

“ yeah we see about that , bring em by when you get the chance” joel turned to the other two as they shook their heads laughing . 

“ i’ll bring him by tomorrow or next day let you get yourself some rest first and well tell ellie of her new roommate too” maria snorted . 

“ we’ll leave you love birds alone and come back later although kept it pg , she ain’t up to much strenuous activities and neither is his back” tommy called as he lead maria out of the room and dodging another pillow coming for his head.  “ we’ll get you a do not disturb sign too” he called up the stairs before they heard him running out the door. 

“ your brother is an ass” y/n flushed as joel stood heading to the door only to shut it. 

“ hey he’s your best friend” he chuckled walking back to the bed getting in the other side holding her gently to her side  kissing her head as he felt her yawn , he could see she was fighting the sleep rubbing her back til he seen her eyes closing and tired little “i love you” falling from her lips. 

“ i love you too darling and it’s only the beginning of me showing you” he smiled kissing her head before his own eyes fell closed . it was the start , the middle and a new beginning of feeling at peace having the woman he loved most in his arms.

taglist : @vickie5446 @harriedandharassed

[total-drama-brainrot]

psycho!noah au, what do the aftermath cast think? conversely if they dont know/dont see the show (isnt it implied to be canon in wt that they watch the show or atleast can?), how do they react to newly eliminated cast members telling them?

and then, at whatever point he gets eliminated or just whenever the cast sees him again, how do they react with that new info?

The justification I have for Noah remaining stealthed under his "stoic cynic" persona pre-reveal in this AU is a little convoluted, but I do have one. Vaguely. Which I'll try to outline here for continuities' sake.

So, to clarify; Noah only competes in Island and World Tour, just like in canon. Most things happen just like canon, with the exception of Noah lasting a little longer in Island so he and Izzy have more time to be menaces (I have no idea how I'll shift the elimination order to justify keeping him around, though). Noah's still eliminated fairly early and ends up on the Playa, where the other elimination fodder welcome him with open arms, because in Island they're only given access to the raw camera footage instead of the final cut!

I imagine it'd be pretty hard for a Brand New Show to have the manpower of a full professional editing team that can plan and prosecute the final cut of a whole ~20 minute episode in only three days (in-universe), so to keep the losers as in the know as possible in real time, they're given access to the same live camera footage Chris and Chef have, just without the confessionals.

Since the confessionals are, uh. Toilets. And no one wants to have 24/7 access to toilet stall footage.

Noah only ever really drops his ruse in the confessional, or around Izzy, so none of the losers have gotten the opportunity to see the real him in action; even when he is visible on camera, it's only during the stolen moments he shares with Izzy outside of challenges, wherein the two plot and scheme together like Pinky and the Brain. Given that the majority of them don't even bother to watch the live footage unless there's a challenge actively happening (or something else otherwise noteworthy), his true nature goes undetected amongst them as well.

And then, in Action, the show's budget and workforce increases. Suddenly, the editing team is thrice the size of Island's, and they are capable of providing a final cut of each episode within the span of 24~72 hours, allowing the show to air quicker. Which has the added bonus of allowing everyone in the peanut gallery access to the yet-to-be-aired episodes (instead of the live footage), keeping them up to date with the competition whilst also giving them the same perspective as the audience itself. Including people's confessions.

It's a good thing Noah didn't compete in Action, then. His mask of indifference lives on.

Then there's a year-long break between seasons, wherein Noah works under Chris as his personal assistant. Yada yada yada, World Tour happens. He knows that the losers are going to see his confessions. So now Noah has to choose between maintaining his persona at the sake of losing out on toying with the greater audience, or carrying on as he did in Island at the cost of revealing his 'true colours' (which, in this case, still isn't the real Noah so much as an exaggeration of his more deranged tendencies, since Noah's still essentially performing for the cameras; just with a different role).

Of course he goes with option two. He's primarily motivated by his own amusement- that was the reason for his whole charade in the first place.

(Alright, clarification over, time to actually answer the question.)

So the peanut gallery and steadily increasing number of World Tour Rejects are horrified when, in Noah's scattering of confessions- as he doesn't confess very often, so when he does it's a treat to himself and the audience- he mostly waxes poetic about how exciting each near-death experience the cast go through is, and all of the different ways he so wanted to cause the others harm (either in general, or themed around the challenges), being so much more expressive than anyone's ever seen him (concerningly so, to the point of it breaching the uncanny valley) and giddy over the prospect of performing Acts Of Incredible Violence against his castmates.

They're living in that same fearful anticipation the wider audience experienced through his tenure in Island; waiting for Noah to Drop The Act and fulfil his promises of brutal sabotage, if only to finally put an end to the constant looming threat of his self control snapping. They're horrified bystanders of a car crash waiting to happen (at least, they think they are. Noah's not actually gonna do any of the things he's suggesting, probably, but keeping the audience on their toes is one of his favourite games!) and each episode he features in is a test of both their patience and their own sanity.

Because, could you imagine watching your friends interact and be friendly with someone who (you think) is out for their blood, entirely unaware of the danger? that's literally what they're experiencing.

And Noah, because he's a little shit who thinks he's funny (he is), sometimes goes so far as to fake-out the audience by rearing up attacks against his castmates during challenges, only to shoot the nearest camera a wry wink and a sly smile as he carries on with the actual task at hand, the others none-the-wiser.

It becomes so concerning, in fact, that every new arrival is immediately checked over for any signs of injuries or Noah's Influence and hastily given the rundown on The Situation. Which is, more often than not, met with the same incredulity as Sierra's claims- until they're shown various clips of Noah's confessions, or the fake-outs and otherwise unhinged looks he teases the cameras with.

-

For the second question; I have no idea. I'm still workshopping how people will react to Noah, and how Noah in turn will react to them. Post-reveal p!Noah will, eventually, disclose the fact that he's not as bloodthirsty as he portrays himself as, but until then it's anyone's guess as to how far he'll take the bit- and who could/will get hurt in the process.

[samcatcher]

When in London.

chapter 3. masterpost

cw: drinking.

Still feeling slightly tired and sleepy, I decided to get out of bed to greet Danny and his friend instead of leaving it until the morning because it seemed to be more respectful.

I slipped out of my plain bed and walked across my empty room. I pulled on a hoodie that I wear when I’m at home but I still had my pyjama shorts and slippers. Then, I made my way downstairs to greet Danny and his friend.

Tall, lanky, auburn, brown eyes. It was the boy, now man, who shared the moon with me 7 years ago. 

Amelia’s party was definitely an event that played on my mind, purely because the after effects were brutal and led to me losing my best friend. However, because it led to Amelia leaving to go to boarding school and me leaving without being allowed to say goodbye, I only focused on that part as opposed to the moment Sam and I shared.

Seeing him standing there though, it brought everything back. From that moment on, I associated Amelia’s party with Sam only.

Sam didn’t seem to remember me, so I didn't mention anything. However the look we shared when I walked down the stairs proved that both of us didn’t forget. I blanked him for the moment and directed my focus to Danny, whom I hadn’t seen in a  brutally long time.

He was a little taller and a lot more muscular. His look had become more unique. He had blonde streaks in his hair and he didn't dry brush his hair anymore. He was still very dreamy although not my type.

I went over and hugged him so tight. His large arms embraced all of me, which was strange because Danny used to be my size.

Sam did a small smile when I looked over at him and he reached his hand out for me to shake. The same hands which I analyzed so long ago. This time, the calluses were deeper and took over more of the surface of his hand.

We shook hands for a few second and as I was about to open my mouth, he said

“I’m Sam.”

I knew.

“I’m Lyla.”

He knew.

A few seconds of silence prolonged as me and Sam stared at each other. I felt him remembering me. I felt him recalling the time we shared. He pulled his eyes down and stopped smiling for a moment then looked back up and smiled at me again. However this time his eyes avoided mine. As if he has remembered something sour.

“Hey Amelia, where’s the bathroom?” Sam asked as I made my way back upstairs.

Meaning there was an awkward set of footsteps following me to my room.

As I walked into my room I saw my phone was lit up. It was ringing. It stopped as I walked over revealing I had received 20 missed calls within the span of 10 minutes.

It started ringing again in my hands and I answered.

“Qu’elle.” I snapped at him. I wasn’t a fan of the newfound spam calling.

Jean was shockingly being kind to me for the first time in hours. He asked if he could see me some time in the next few days. I thought it was too soon for him to want to come but I accepted because I knew I’d miss him by the weekend.

“Je t’aime Jean. Bonne nuit.” I said to Jean on the phone, as I did I saw Sam walk past and glance into my room with a confused expression. He saw I was looking back at him and his head snapped back in front of him, looking down slightly.

After Sam walked away, Amelia walked towards my door and placed a soft knock even though it was open. I moved my eyes to her.

“Do you want to join us downstairs? Danny brought some drinks.” She asked me cautiously, she remembered that I liked to go to bed quite early.

“Yeah I’d love to.” I replied, unexpectedly to myself. I think my brain just wanted to converse with Sam again. Especially after all of these years.

I got up from my bed and followed Amelia downstairs. I hadn’t been in the living room yet, it was definitely the best decorated room in the house. Amelia was proud of the living room. There were two sofas and a large coffee table between them. A large TV stood above a vintage fireplace and a lamp lit up the entire room dimly.

Danny was unloading a case of beer on the coffee table and Sam left the room to answer a phone call. I sat down on the smaller sofa and opened a beer. Danny sat on the larger sofa next to Amelia, the Sam returned and sat next to me.

Danny and Amelia began to catch up in their own conversation, talking about family and things Sam and I weren’t well versed in. Therefore there was silence between us. I decided to break the ice.

“So what do you do in the band?” I asked, looking at his hands which were slightly red from the coldness of the beer. 

“I play bass and keys.” Sam stated, he still was struggling to make eye contact with me. I just nodded fondly.

“I used to hear you guys play in Amelia’s basement I think. We were never allowed down there while you were practicing. You were in the band back then right?” I asked him, suddenly feeling anxious that it wasn’t him I would hear playing.

“Yeah that was me. My brothers worked me pretty hard. When I was in that basement I wasn’t allowed to leave. Same goes for our garage back home.” He laughed nervously.

Another silence followed and Sam sighed. This was the second time he actually met eyes with me since I pretended not to remember him.

“Lyla, I don’t know if this will be awkward to say but I don't want to keep it in anymore. Since Amelia’s party, I have been looking for you.”

I didn’t know what to say, although I was glad it was acknowledged that the party happened.

“You do- you do remember right?” He said with a small voice.

“I do.” I replied just as small.

I decided not to comment on what he said. About how he has been looking for me. I switched the conversation after a few seconds of silence.

“So, you on the couch?” I asked, raising my eyebrows.

“Yeah. We’re staying for the week. Depending on the venues that still need to get back to us though, it could be two. I’m grateful for you and Amelia for letting us stay. We couldn’t afford four hotel rooms and I didn’t really want to be limited to one room with my twin brothers and Danny.” He laughed nervously again.

I couldn’t help but notice a cute quirk in the way he spoke. After a sentence he would do a small smirk and kind of a head nod. Or run his fingers through his hair. It was like an anxious habit, routine. He did it every time he spoke or looked at me.

I realized I hadn’t replied because I was too focused on admiring how similar he still looked.

I ended up laughing and nodding my head. 

“So how old are you now?” I asked. Watching him run his fingers through his hair once again.

“I’m turning 22 next month” He said and raised his eyebrows.

“Oh me too!” I replied. “What day?” I added.

“The 3rd.” He added and nodded.

“We have the same birthday!” I said with a shocked expression on my face. Sam followed and adapted my expression, Then he laughed.

“That’s so cool actually.” He said and then looked down.

Hesitantly, he asked “what time were you born?”

“8:00pm on the dot.” I replied.

His expression deepened and he began shaking his head.

“Is this a bit?” He asked me.

“No. Don’t tell me…” I said

“We were born at exactly the same time.” He simply stated.

Sam and I had no age difference. Merely seconds apart from each other.

We shared the news with Amelia and Danny, who already knew. 

We talked about what our favorite birthdays were, he said his 13th was a good one. I said I hated my 13th. The conversation went on for what felt like hours. But I felt myself getting tired. 

“I’m gonna go to bed guys.” I said after a while. I was met with a few goodnights. Sam said “sweet dreams.”

That night it was hard to fall asleep. Sam was on my mind unwillingly. Specifically about how we were literally exactly the same age and how if we had stayed in contact after that night, we would have celebrated every birthday from 16 with each other in mind.

The next morning, I awoke to the sweet smell of crepes. It reminded me of my great grandma and my family. I rolled out of bed and brushed my hair then braided it without looking. I put on a pair of old leggings and a plain white shirt. Today's plan was to paint my bedroom before all of my furniture arrived. 

As I was putting on a pair of white socks, there was a knock on my door.

“Come in” I said horsley, my voice was still sleeping.

Sam came in and brought me a cup of coffee.

“Amelia told me how you like it.” He said as he placed it next to me on the ground. There was nowhere else to put it.

“Thank you Sam, that's too sweet.” I said, taking a sip.

“Oh, too much sugar?” He asked.

“No, you are sweet. The sugar is just enough.” I replied.

Sam laughed and left the room. Closing my door. Although the smell led me out a few seconds later.

Curiously I walked out of my room, which led me to the kitchen, and I saw Sam and Danny cooking and laughing, the kitchen was extremely messy. Cracked eggs everywhere, spilled sugar and milk, strawberry stems, and two empty mugs of what I assume was coffee. 

I laughed at the mess, which caused them both to turn around and laugh at me as well. Then Sam started to slightly clean up out of embarrassment.

I opened the door to the balcony and stepped out into the warm summer morning of London. I sat on a small chair that was out there and opened my phone. I had a couple of texts from Jean, as he had woken up before me. 

I decided not to reply, but to just call him instead. 

We chatted on the phone for a while, I told him about my plans to paint my room and he told me about how he was getting called into work that day.

Although all I cared about at that moment was why Sam was staring at me from inside. 

Jean caught on and asked me why I was distracted, annoyance in my voice I told him I wasn't. Eventually he and I ran out of things to talk about. So I told him I loved him and that I had to go. 

I put my phone down next to me and continued looking at the clouds, suddenly I heard the patio door slide open, barefoot Sam came out to join me. There wasn't a chair for him, so he sat on the floor and leaned against the door, which he had closed as he was coming out. 

“French?” He asked. 

I nodded and continued to look at the clouds. I noticed he was still staring at me so I looked at him and smiled. 

“Yeah, I lived there for seven years.” I replied and smiled.

“So that’s where you went.” Sam said slowly lost in thought and staring up at the sky.

I was finding it so hard not to stare at his body. He was wearing a pair of baggy sweats and no shirt. His hair was up in a messy bun. He still had sleep in his eyes, he probably only woke up like 20 minutes before me. 

We sat alone on the balcony for a while, looking at the clouds. 

Fuck it. 

“Do you wanna help me do something today?” I asked him. I knew I couldn't paint my room alone. 

And I also knew that Amelia and Danny would want to do something together, they hadn't seen each other in ages apparently. And asking Sam to help me with my room would allow them to be able to go out somewhere without feeling guilty. 

“Yeah sure, I'm free until 4. That's when I've got to go to the pub and meet my brothers, for practice and setting up for the show at 7.”

I nodded and started,

“I need to paint my room today, and I need someone to help me pick out the colors and actually paint, are you down for it?” I nervously touched my hair. 

Sam looked at Danny from inside, then he shrugged and nodded. 

“Yeah sure, I don't see a problem with that, let me just go and get ready, because it seems you're ready to leave.”  He laughed, then made his way back inside, I read his lips and he told Danny, and Danny raised his eyebrows and smiled. Probably relieved that he could go out with his sister today. 

I smiled to myself on the balcony, I was happy that Sam agreed, even though I hadn't known him for long. 

A few minutes later he walked back onto the balcony, wearing a summery outfit, a half buttoned white shirt with a black shirt underneath. And a pair of blue denim shorts. No shoes yet. I was scared he was never going to put any on, but he was holding a fresh cup of coffee. 

We sat for another 5 minutes just talking about random things, then he took the last sip from his coffee cup and we both got up to leave.

chapter 4

[hungryyheart]

@miidnighters

ty for your questions b!!!!!!!

SO. newly-infected hosts shed all of their teeth during Eighth Night; the old teeth are pushed out by the new teeth, which start developing under the membrane minutes after the parasite attaches.

ALL of the teeth in a vampii's mouth are made of ivory, not just the fangs, and they have an off-white, "parchment paper" appearance. each vampii is designed to have the same amount of teeth and a fairly similar layout (like humans), but there can be variations (like humans) depending on the individual. the classic layout includes four enhanced canines for stabbing and tearing (fangs), incisors to help to grab and slice prey, premolars, and then adapted molars that typically span from the second premolar to the back of the mouth, known as the shearing and crushing teeth (carnassials.) the jaw adapts to sustain the weight of the ivory as well as to unhinge in very very rare occasions (seen mostly in feral strains), and the mouth adapts to try and avoid over or underbites, although this isn't always the case for some (in urban strains, they'll usually be regulated to tasks that don't involve hunting and that aren't so "customer-facing"; in some cases they might actually be eradicated altogether)

on the topic of their mouths, their tongues also have enhanced papillae that make it easier to strip meat from bones!

the vampii lifespans differ greatly between the strains. this can get a little confusing because urban vampiis don't count their human years into their total lifespan, they only count the years spent living with the parasite (because it's sooooo fun and whimsical, clearly.) as a general rule most urban vampiis won't see past 90. ferals on the other hand can live well into their hundreds, averaging around 170 years with the parasite. i am pleased to say that conrad sets the record for the oldest ever vampii at the time of his death!! but let's not talk too much about it. sundays are sad enough already.

i've written many a post about the vampii societies, several of which i still need to transfer over from the old blog, but i'll try to make this summary as succinct as possible!

vampiis are split into two strains that branched off from the same initial infection: urban and feral. urbans live in groups of up to 20, known as colonies. ferals live in much smaller, tight-knit groups of about 7 to 9, known as packs. urbans live among humans (their primary source of nourishment) and as such, blend in as much as they can to aid them in their hunting efforts. ferals live in forests or patches of woodland (rarely countryside) and exist more closely to the true needs of the parasite.

the urban colonies are strictly hierarchal, led by a single vampii known as sàr, who is advised by a small council of vampiis they've hand-selected and who are normally assigned to overlook hunting and scouting parties. it is only the vampiis within this council that are permitted to sire more vampiis. there are some middle-ranking vampiis, but the bulk of most colonies consist of low-rankers. it's the aim of the low-ranker to move up the ladder, because low-rankers eat last. vampiis have about 3 days after a feed until they need to feed again. the longer they go without feeding, the closer they get to coming face-to-face with the bhiast.

feral packs, being much smaller, are more closely bonded (it's only the feral strains that can develop telepathy with each other -- does that ring a bell???? i am so predictable) and their main concern is distancing themselves from humans, and the urban vampiis. everyone feeds equally and everyone looks out for each other. however, because they choose to live a more "primitive" life (according to the urbans lmao), they're both ridiculed and feared by the colonies who consider them more monstrous and unruly.

conrad's siring was an accident. he was sired by a starving feral vampii who was mauled to death by scouts from the local urban colony. he was shunned by these same urbans because of his strain, and essentially left to die, but was rescued by one of his neighbours, who returned him to his family home. conrad fled this home on Eighth Night when the first stage of the transformation was completed, culminating in him eating his baby sister's bunny rabbits in front of everybody. this is not how things are done with vampiis, and it's only one of many reasons why conrad is such an enigma among them.

to answer your final question -- conrad doesn't fit in! his feral strain ostracizes him from the urban colony in the city and makes a pariah of him, as well as a threat to their safety, since some believe he'll lead the nearby feral pack to their doorstep. while it's true that he's been noticed by the feral pack, and invited to live among them, he refuses because he's scared of handing himself over to the infection. this is the main draw of living in an urban colony: the total denial. he could live a comfortable life among the ferals, but he's terrified of it, and of himself. he can't accept his lineage or himself because it's what makes him "wild".

the sàr of the colony in manhattan (i call it nyc on this blog but likewise with the freeks it's not actually nyc in the novel) isn't overly worried about conrad's presence in their territory because they know that conrad is harmless. however, this viewpoint is not shared by a trio of low-rankers in the colony, who harass and bully conrad to make themselves feel like they're actually doing something important (instead of the menial tasks they've been assigned to) by keeping the local stray on his toes. this is the closest he gets to being involved with his own kind. he mirrors the urbans in a lot of ways because he also chooses to pretend that what's happening to him isn't really happening to him, and he naturally gravitates toward humans because it's all he's ever known.

newly-sired vampiis are mentored by their sire, but conrad, rejected by the urbans and who in turn rejected the ferals, had to learn everything for himself. he's got the basics covered and frankly that's enough for him. it's not enough for the tall, naked bruised girl who stands and watches him in the corner of his attic abode some nights, but we'll talk about her another time.

[stickidystickblog]

…i kinda wanna hear your stories about being scared of fishes

personally i am scared of the ocean, it makes me so nervous brnfıe. And like that the fishes inside it also scares me usually, makes me wanna scream when they’re around 🥳

*Cracks knuckles* I have many but the most prominent story the displays my fear of fish very well is the bucket story So back in 2018 I was working out of state for my first job as an office clerk up in Alaska on a fish processing plant and it was one of our slow days so my boss says "Hey, some of our fishermen are here and they've offered to take us out on a ride around the bay in their boat." Now I was pretty bored and my roommate was enthused about going on a not-so-company-approved boat outing around the bay so we agreed. Everything was going pretty well! We got on the boat and headed out and were pretty captivated by conversation and the beautiful sights the tiny Alaskan bay we were in had to offer. About midway through a conversation my roommate and the ship captain were having I turned my head and saw a bucket. Now I'm a curious person, a curious little fella, a being of whimsy if you will, so I'm like 'dang... there's a bucket there. I wonder what's in that bucket' because surely there could be *anything* in a bucket on a small fishing vessel during salmon season right? Anything at all! So I took an inconspicuous step closer to this bucket and came face to face with a dead fish. I don't know why but I immediately squeaked in horror and *jumped* at the sight of this fish. So very noticeably that my roommate and the ship captain looked over to make sure I was good. I was fine and everyone went back to idly chattering. ... about 5 minutes later I have 100% forgotten that the bucket exists and my eyes are wandering and I lock eyes with the glossed-over, scarily foggy, glass eye of this dead fish and I jump again! but slightly less so, and the squeak I make is slightly smaller. I'm shaking now. Why did I jump at the same fish twice?? Surely I wouldn't be scared of it again right?? WRONG!!! I turned back to converse and 5 minutes later I forgot about the fish, looked over, and felt shivers run down my spine BUT this time I didn't jump or make a noise. A couple minutes after that I'd forgotten for the last time and looked over. I didn't jump, didn't make a noise, just stared down this dead-eyed fish and shook for a good minute before my roommate registered I was being odd and tapped me on the shoulder to ask me if I was good. That fish scared me not once... not twice... but FOUR separate times within the span of 20 minutes. I still to this day don't know how I kept forgetting it was there and getting scared every time. Fish just creep me out. The way that they look and feel. Icky ! ! ! I was never *really* scared of fish before this either!!! Like this *awoke* something in me and ever since I've just had an aversion to fish eyes. And then the next year I went to work at a different plant and I took some extra hours literally gutting fish so like *stares* I have such a weird relationship with aquatic life. I totally understand the fear of the ocean. Too big, I don't want things touching me in there. I refused to swim in the bay by my dad's old boat dock because I didn't want to even *think* about fish or seaweed touching me while we swam. Wah!! Sorry, this was a long response but *stares* that darn fish got me every time

[soft-persephone]

Captured by the Storm

Doug Renetti x Black!Female OC x Tina Lewis

Word Count: 1k

Warnings/Mini Summery: Melancholy, soft angst. Loss. Sad but not too sad. Funeral. Mourning. Grief. Light comfort. Tiny bit of longing.

Angel shifted on top of  the quilt that stayed with her through her youngest years of childhood. The heavily floral pattern worn with age brought back memories as stuffy as the room she was in. The good and the bad.  .  . . her mother. She could smell them all on the quilt, in this room, in the air, humid as it was.

The humidity captured her, holding her hostage to the little girl she used to be. To the time she spent in this town. It tortured her, leaving behind its evidence with a thin but growing sheen of sweat on her skin. The cup of ice water on her old nightstand was melting away into condensation within minutes. No matter how much she drank of the warm water, her tongue stayed thick and heavy in her mouth.

Her only comfort was the sound of the rain. The smell of it. 

It enraptured her in the  swaddling nostalgia that was home. Reminding her of the good, but left her equally as forlorn. Her comfort soon became another enemy. Torturing her along with the  humidity. Helping it rise higher and higher into the night. 

The moon itself was not in the sky, keeping itself scarce, leaving her in the dark with her capturers.

Everyone else was asleep. 

She would be too if it wasn’t the only time she could talk to Doug and Tina without being disturbed. 

She turned her head to face the clock. It was barely midknight. 

Tina said they would be working late tonight. They might be home around 20 past midnight or something like that. She couldn’t really remember. She tuned out after Tina said midknight. 

It was too long.

It was too long to go without talking to Tina or Doug. 

She was used to not being around them when they were all in the same city, but now, she was across the entire country without them. Her time zone was  an even two hours ahead. She was used to waiting hours upon hours until she saw them again, but now being so far away. .. made it completely unbearable. 

She never would have said it back in California, but she hated the high stakes reward nature of their job. 

Everything was a gamble with few guarantees. That meant an irregular unpredictable work schedule. She could go from seeing them everyday to not at all in such a short span of time. The rollercoaster of time they had to spend together was a nightmare for her clingy at heart nature. 

She was comfortable laughing it off with a joke about her mom passing away when she was young, but they didn't find it as funny as she did. 

She couldn't pretend it didn't bother her anymore. 

Licking her lips, she picked up the phone and dialed their number.

“Angel?” Doug's voice was warm and thick, adding to the unbearable humidity. Her skin felt stickier than it already was a moment ago, “Why are you still up? Are you okay? Did you want to talk about your aunt?”

“N- no. . .” That's why she was here wasn’t it? Her Mom’s sister had passed. The last of her grandmother’s children. They were all together now. That gave her some comfort. “I. . .I just miss you and Tina so much.”

“What about your family? It's been a while since they've seen you! All the way from California!”

“Yeah.” she replied weakly, not really sure what else to say. 

“That has to be exciting!” 

His voice washed over her in waves. Not loud, not a shout, he was mellow and refreshing. She  talked just enough. Saying the minimum polite requirement of words to carry a conversion, so she’d have the courtesy of just laying in the dark, listening to him. 

“Wh– What– what did you wear today?” she croaked out. 

He paused, but she could hear his smile. The sound of it brightened the room around her. It was her saving grace away from her captures in the night.

“The two piece blush pink suit.” He sounded a little deadpan but still utterly amused. “Sorry I didn't have time to find something sexier before you called.” he laughed, making the room grow that much brighter, making her feel less alone, “I thought I had more time.”

She laughed with him.

The heat and the memories fading away into the background. . .into a different reality.

“What about Tina? Angel smiled, pretty dumbly too if anyone made her admit it. The anticipation left her senses fumbling into stupidity. 

“Uhm,” his falter gave her pause, “A red dress. I think it's new?’

The darkness of the room was back, and she snapped back into reality. 

She was still far away.

Angel’s tongue darted along her lips and her eyes frantically searched in the dark. She already knew every little object in the room, but she needed to look at them all again. 

Words came tumbling out of her mouth, asking, begging, and pleading for the details, but her tongue felt thick and unfamiliar. It was hot and sticky in her mouth as her skin was from the humidity and sweat. 

“Woah woah, slow down.” Doug chuckled. “You're talking too fast and your accent sounds like it's gotten thicker since you’ve been home. I can't understand you.”

“Can you put Tina on?” 

Angel grabbed the glass for another sip of warm water before laying back down.

“Hey,” Tina said softly. Her voice was sultry and seductive. It was soothing. . . warm, “it's funny how lonely it feels over here when you're all the way over there.” She paused, “It's crazy to think how one person makes such a big  difference in our lives.”

Angel’s body was overwhelmed with heat. She couldn’t bring herself to say anything sentimental or sweet. It was breaking her, and it would only get worse when the sun came up. 

“Why. . .” Angel inhaled sharply, “did you wear it today? You know I'm not there?” 

Tina didn’t say anything and she started to feel a little agitated. 

“You know I wanted to see you in it first.”

"Maybe I wanted to hear you get upset,” Tina teased.

Angel laughed. Despite the hot humid room, it was cold, rueful, and dry. 

“Fine!” she managed to spit out, “Just wait till I get home! I’m not bringing you a surprise gift either.”

“Then I'd say. . .it was worth it.’

Angel huffed.

“I don't wanna hear you complain when Doug gets the biggest, most awesome gift.”

[fattestwriting]

YOU, yes YOU, the mun of this blog, with a blobby body bigger than the sun, and the hunger of a black hole, and the desire to turn everything around you into an endless ocean of your own piss, shit, and cum~

"Huh? What? This ask is absurd. Do people really not realize this stuff isn't real?"

Without a second thought, R-

"What the fuck was that!"

She turned around fervently, trying to find where the voice was coming from, only to realize-

"No, no way! I am not being narrated right now, that stuff isn't real! I must be drea-"

But Roxy's words had been cut off, as the ask took effect upon her body. She suddenly felt the pounds gaining on her body, pouring onto her like a bowl of lard. She quickly burst out of the home she had lived in, expanding rapidly.

The trans girl's body used to be small. She was 6'1", much to her shagreen, and she sported a pot belly that stuck out an inch or so from her chubby body with a muffin top that did the same around her sides. She had had small bingo arms, a blobby pelvis, chair filling thighs, a tights busting ass, chubby cheeks, and an average gock, but that was all gone, replaced with a much more cosmic version of herself.

She was now bigger than the sun, with all of her ever-churning balls, plump adipose riddled ass cheeks, and perky pear shaped tits each being the size of the gas ball. Her stomach had ballooned massively, with her blobby form being over 20 times the Suns size, without even accounting for her 10x the sun sized neck and solar system spanning cock.

"Oh FUCK me this feels so good,,,"

The lowly Tumblr writer had forgotten all about the voice in her head, about the absurdity of the situation, about anything other than her sheer size and the sexual pleasure she got from it. Her cock was harder than it had ever been, reaching light years in size, in both girth and length. Her pre soaked every galaxy she was facing before she even had a chance to think about cumming... Or her now very hungry stomach. It growled ferociously, informing her she needed to eat, now. She started with the Earth, if for no reason than sentimental value, but as she approached she felt small bumps hitting her jiggly fat.

"Aw, how cute! They've achieved world peace, by teaming together to launch every nuke at me! Not like that'll save them~"

And so, she finally beg- Hey! Hey what are you- You can't be in here! Uh, yes I can? It's my Tumblr blog. Get the fuck outta here guy, or I'll add you to the menu. Jesus, the gaul of some people. BBWWWUUUAAARRRPPP. Anyways, I finally began to eat the Earth, which consisted of a single slurp, which also happened to suck in the moon. As they continued to bombard my belly with nuclear missiles, I couldn't help but get a lil bloated! So-

*PPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLTHTHTHTHTHTHTHTHTHTHTHTHTHTHBBBBBBB*

I let loose a cosmic wave of flatulence that destroyed the entire galaxy! Which sucked ass, because I was still super hungry, but was just the most arousing shit imaginable, so I came! And as the cum filled the entire universe, it eventually came to me, all of the mass in the universe being taken straight to me by my own tidal wave of cum. So, naturally, I drank all of it, putting all of my own cum and every piece of matter in the universe into my belly. Over the next couple minutes, I finished off any scraps until it was finally just me against the edge of the universe.

Literally, it was pressing up against me, with my dick stretching it out noticeably, literally warping reality around it's immensity. But all that cum and all that mass had made me really need to go to the bathroom... So I did! I began spewing shit across the wall of the universe, as remnants of the universe was sticking out of my shit. At the same time, I released a tidal wave of piss that was yellow as the sun and reeked just as bad as my shit. Within seconds, I was surrounded by nothing but the warm blanket of an infinite amount of my own shit and piss, a feeling so damn hot that I came on the spot, stopping my piss flow so I could shoot out an entire universe worth of cum, which, naturally, finally broke the universal barrier.

As soon as I was in the multi verse, I realized something... Every character I'd ever read or written breaking the barriers of a universe was here. All of them. And they were fat as ever~ And so, I did as anyone would do in my situation... I got to work eating every universe and universe puncturing character (and sometimes IRL friend), shitting out the extra as I went. By the time I was done, it was once again me pressing up against the edge of the universe surrounded by my own shit, but unlike last time, I was still full. So I pushed. I pushed and released the biggest log of shit yet, one bigger than my entire body, the one which finally broke the multiversal barrier... Only to realize. This process was infinite.

And so I ate again, shat again, and kept going. Forever. I'm reaching you from there now. I've broken through over a trillion barriers, and I can't even begin to imagine how big I am in comparison to whatever universe gets this. The characters had stopped showing up a while ago, because I truly never dreamed this big, but I did notice a blob the same size as me in the distance, also covered in their own shit... I wonder.

[cagemasterfantasy]

Dnd Spells: Wall of Stone

Wall of Stone is a level 5 Evocation spell for Druid Sorcerer and Wizard. Casting Time is 1 action Range is 120 feet Requires a Verbal and Somatic Component spell ingredient a cube of granite Duration is Concentration up to 10 minutes.

A nonmagical wall of solid stone springs into existence at a point you choose within range. The wall is 6 inches thick and is composed of ten 10-foot-by-10-foot panels. Each panel must be contiguous with another panel. Alternatively, you can create 10-foot-by-20-foot panels that are only 3 inches thick.

If the wall cuts through a creature’s space when it appears, the creature is pushed to one side of the wall (you choose which side). If a creature would be surrounded on all sides by the wall (or the wall and another solid surface), that creature can make a Dexterity saving throw. On a success, it can use its Reaction to move up to its Speed so that it is no longer enclosed by the wall.

The wall can have any shape you desire, though it can’t occupy the same space as a creature or object. The wall doesn’t need to be vertical or rest on a firm foundation. It must, however, merge with and be solidly supported by existing stone. Thus, you can use this spell to bridge a chasm or create a ramp.

If you create a span greater than 20 feet in length, you must halve the size of each panel to create supports. You can crudely shape the wall to create battlements and the like.

The wall is an object made of stone that can be damaged and thus breached. Each panel has AC 15 and 30 Hit Points per inch of thickness, and it has Immunity to Poison and Psychic damage. Reducing a panel to 0 Hit Points destroys it and might cause connected panels to collapse at the DM’s discretion.

If you maintain your Concentration on this spell for its full duration, the wall becomes permanent and can’t be dispelled. Otherwise, the wall disappears when the spell ends.

[captainsquality]

I live in northeastern Kansas, which is probably the most heavily populated region of the state. My hometown is probably what you'd call mid-sized(at least for this part of the country) and last I knew a very rough census put our local population at ~100,000.

Now my parents and I moved last year and live more toward the north part of town which quickly pitters out into more rural areas, but we previously lived further south around the central part of town. We were reasonable walking distance from both major local hospitals and one block off of one of the busiest major roads(6th avenue).

Within two minutes of driving one direction is the downtown area with all the corporate buildings etc. the other direction, the same amount of time in the car, is the western campus of one of the hospitals where the psycch ward and behavioral healthcare offices are, the Huge Local Park, like the community center type one with gardens and a huge pool and carousel. the place you go to plan a huge bday party.

just past that is a major thoroughfare with a SHIT ton of fast food places, multiple grocery stores and pharmacies- the zoo is also in this area, but it's very well contained(obviously) and taken care of.

all this to say that the park around the corner from the house we lived in at that point(and had since I was age 5, in 1996) was not a place you would or by rights SHOULD expect to encounter any kind of larger wildlife than squirrels and songbirds, the occasional rabbit or tiny lizard.

A list of Outstanding Specimens I have encountered over the years follows.

-A wholeass hawk that swooped down over the open area/field next to the tennis court to scoop up and depart with its dinner, an unfortunate squirrel

-in the 'creek'[manmade, not an Actual Creek, connected to an underpass that lets out somewhere downtown. dont ask me why i know this], a snapping turtle at least twice the size of your average house cat. it tail made it more reminiscent of a very small crocodile wearing a combat helmet as a shirt. (this instance was probably in my middle childhood over summer, while out playing with my younger brother and the neighbor kids)

-Usually in passing, I have multiple times seen red foxes in the area, and at least once a very confused coyote who apparently got off at the wrong bus stop or something

-Large waterbirds like herons. Several springs and summers there were entire GROUPS of them that seemed to nest nearby and they just chilled on the playground equipment. Those things are fucking huge do you know what it is like to be a child/teenager and sitting on the swings and suddenly like three of those bitches are landing on the framework around you. I thought I was going to die

-in most recent memory before our move: AN ENTIRE ASS HOWEVER MANY POINTS FUCKING BUCK. And it was not just In Passing from a distance. No I was ON A WALK, on the cement path from the street to the jungle gym on my usual route, there were a couple of kids from the neighborhood(sisters i think, they had brought juice pouches and books w them too) on the seesaws about ten yards away. That entireass buck BOLTED past me within a margin of ten FEET, ACROSS the span of the playground, past the terrified little girls, down into- and ACROSS- the ditch we referred to as The Creek and then off through the neighborhood to god knows where. That same deer appeared downtown later that same afternoon, apparently, and crashed through a shop window before it was contained and removed from the area.

Needless to say I froze, lIKE A DEER, and exchanged a long look with those little kids. And I simply said, calmly as I could, bc as a 20-something I was the adult in the situation and could not be panicking, "hey you two might wanna run on home for a bit k? or at least have a grownup with you in case that fella stomps through again" and they were like. nodding rapidly and grabbing up their crayons to scamper off home.

Myself, I proceeded to about-face and walk right back around the corner and to the house, entering the home like That One Candace Meme, You Know The One.

These are just a few instances from the 25+ years I spent living at that house. We're not SUPER removed from rural areas, as I mentioned, our town is more mid-sized, it's really not a metropolis, but this was still basically one of the most heavily populated parts of the city. And I have still heard PLENTY of Bigass Animal Stories from much bigger cities.

something something lawless wasteland/hellscape, or whatever. fun fact you can pass within twenty feet of a bird of pray nearly the size of a dog and as long as you are like ignoring them and calmly passing through like It's Your Job they dont giveafuck and will let u be, i know from experience necessitated by unfortunate proximity at the time

A BEAR ATE MY BEST HUMMINGBIRD FEEDER.

Rude.

[gadgetsboy]

Jaguar's Going All-Electric, but is it the Right Move?

It's not everyday that you see an auto manufacturer change its entire game plan, but it looks like this is the strategy that veteran company Jaguar is going for, at least moving forward. The company is pushing its efforts towards a complete reinvention, shifting from its historical focus on luxury vehicles to the volume premium space, which may or may not be good news to some. Nevertheless, it's bound to be an interesting journey to watch unfold over the next few years. With that in mind, Jaguar is aiming to create desirable and aspirational electric vehicles, while at the same time maintaining its reputation for beauty and craftsmanship. Probably not an easy feat, but given its decades of experience and key personnel behind its operations, it shouldn't be too surprising to see the company successfully pull off this full transition. The company is planning to phase out its current vehicles, and will introduce a completely redesigned range of electric vehicles over the coming years. CHECK OUT: Worried about Car Theft? JLR has you Covered New Pricing, Same Signature Look It should be noted though that Jaguar's new vehicles will be more expensive than its current lineup, which we suppose is entirely unsurprising, at least for the moment. Part of this major shakeup involves the arrival of its new Electric Architecture, a unique platform that's designed for the company's upcoming range of electric vehicles. This lineup includes the I-Pace, which will be an affordable luxury electric SUV (starting at around $100,000) and represents the increase in price of the company's vehicles, as mentioned earlier; the company expects 10-15% growth in sales compared to existing models. Of course despite this planned major overhaul, the company wants to maintain its identity in aspects such as design, in particular. This means cars with a unique and bold look that feature a clear and uniform resemblance within families, with each individual design being different enough in a way to stand out on its own. A closer look reveals that the company has been working on this particular brand transformation for the past three years, although it won't be revealing much about its new strategy until the second half of 2024. In addition to the shift in focus on the product, this massive transformation will involve new brand positioning and customer experiences that will seamlessly meld with Jaguar's new approach. Jaguar also held an internal design competition within the company, splitting the design team into three groups and giving them 18 weeks to come up with three body stocks. The teams were given free rein to create modern and exuberant designs, resulting in close to 24 size plays in the three-month span. A Competitive Industry Photo by Matt Crossick/PA Wire External design aside, there are of course key differences which need to be considered when designing and engineering electric vehicles. Manufacturers have likewise gradually designed their respective models to be homogenous, and almost "generic" in a sense, in order to focus on range and aerodynamics. As such, Jaguar is looking to stand out in a growing sea of otherwise "dime-a-dozen" EVs, and the company is banking on great design, leading tech, and efficient engineering to set itself apart from the competition. It also happens that Jaguar is at work right now in designing an upcoming EV with considerable range and charging capabilities - currently under wraps, the mystery vehicle will be able to cover a range of over 700 km (or 720 miles), with rapid charging capabilities that allows for an 80% charge in just 20 minutes. Jaguar is also planning to offer a full range of electrification services, including home charging, public charging, and destination charging. With regards to Jaguar's brand identity, the company wants to capitalize on the reputation of its cars as being "driver's vehicles" by focusing on giving owners a purely driving-focused experience with characteristics designed to deliver such. Jaguar says that the driving position and the relationship between the driver and the vehicle are crucial in helping its already-known brand stand out more, which will need to be consistent across all its upcoming vehicles. Release Timeframe Photo by Michael Leckie/PA Wire As for when we can expect new EVs from Jaguar, the company says that it will unveil its new vehicular design language next year, with the first car to go on sale in North America by the end of 2025. It's expected that three new EVs will be released, with prices ranging from around $100,000 to $200,000. Furthermore, a second model is expected to hit markets around 2026, with the third model's release date still a mystery for the time being. The company is also in the midst of working out what features consumers an expect from its new vehicles - as such, the new EVs go beyond being a mere commodity vehicle, and will instead primarily build on being a sensor-surround car for high-network individuals, with a range of over 400 miles which should be ideal in large countries like the US. There's also talks of an EV with a 1,000 horsepower "S" version, although as with the rest of its upcoming vehicles not much is known right now; the company adds that it intends to develop first-party battery hardware development. Jaguar is of course open to working with third parties and experts in other aspects of the tech that will be integrated in its upcoming vehicles, and wants to leverage partnerships and underlying systems for technology implementation. Other Considerations It should also be noted that the company is considering strengthening its presence in the Chinese market, with potential for overseas expansion. There are key factors to take into account as well, such as China's focus on full electric vehicles and competition from local brands which offer competitive designs and features. For premium markets in general, Jaguar is looking into how brands in the luxury market tend to succeed in high-priced segments due to their established reputation and history. The challenge therefore lies in differentiating luxury brands from competitors offering similar products at lower prices. Now with all this being said, the company isn't intending to drop support for older vehicles. In terms of legacy models and aftermarket parts, the company assures that it will continue to support older vehicles, including service requirements and used car sales. Customers can also remain confident that they'll continue receiving support and aftermarket parts for their vehicles throughout the vehicle's reasonable life. In any case, there's a lot to look forward to with Jaguar's plans for the coming years, and with competition in the EV market fiercer than ever, the company has a lot riding on this massive overhaul. Read the full article

[mot-minh-toi]

I don't really feel good these days, finding myself relapsing back into bad habits: getting angry easily, doubting myself, over analyzing past social behaviors and situations, agonizing myself over what I think I should have done or could have done better.

I still not dare or still can't make sense or make clear of my feelings, but I watched a movie today, I don't pay 100% attention but just enough to go through it. It was a good movie, win awards, and that helps greatly. I am also thinking about doing some exercise to improve my mood - which is something I usually did not think of before.

Thoughts of death still haunt me, but setting a count down the "judgment" day did help a bit in getting myself out of the over analyzing things.

I still fantasize about drastic solutions and reactions to things, but I hope that when I time comes, I will have enough courage and strength to do what I think is best and move on.

I watch "Poor Things" today.

It has a lot of sex scences, but these scences are not jarring or out of place or make me uncomfortable like other movies, in fact I feel it provides much needed contrast to Bella's other activities as well as help us audiences (me) recognize her growth in character/experience. I don't know if that's intentional, artfully done, or just me reading into things and trying to sound smart, lol. But anyways, enough about that, I guess I must have felt strange regarding these scenes (I usually don't feel this... normal about them) and ironically find myself needed to explain/express that.

The setting is also new and interesting to me. It sets up in what I deemed as the middle of the 19th century but also has some really modern machinery. The sky has a dream-esque atmosphere to it but all fit so well together. Like i took me a moment to realize how strange the animal inside the house was. Weird things are accepted, and yet still some of the modern/the current time's ideas remain. And the people in it, I can not completely demonize anyone (except maybe the general), every characters have their own nuances and even one of the antagonists - Mark Ruffalo's character (he's great in this btw) - I do not condemned him, I even sympathize in some scenes, but mostly just pity him. He is such a miserable and small-minded - pretty moron - that I cannot hate him.

For the rest of the characters, even Harry, I can find goodness within their flaws. I had thought that Max would be my favorite, no faults character, but not even the first arc of the movie had ended when I found something I disliked about him. But, after all, I find most characters lovely and all are necessary to the film - and to Bella's journey of finding herself.

The movie is intriguing to me. I find myself needing to stop very few times, and I was able to watch the movie within its run time and not drag it to days, which is refreshing for me nowadays. Even when it was just 20 minutes left, I still found myself very invested in finding out what would happen next. And what I thought i had figured out from the "crumbs" they left me turned out to be a small plot twist - at least to me.

I also want to talk about the transition - I have an attention span of (what suspect) an ADD infected brain, and I completely missed out on the charging of b&w movie to colorful collors. I think this is their way of showing that Bella's mind and view are changing and exanding. Also, Bella's behavior, speech, and demeanor change so subtly with her knowledge that it is such a smooth transition that it's lovely to watch.

At the end of the movie, I find all my questions answered, and those that aren't were not a concern to me. I thoroughly enjoyed this experience and hope "Saltburn" and "Late night with the devil will be the same." I haven't felt this way since "Moon Knight. " I am extremely happy with my decision to wait and not let my curiosity for spoilers ruin this movie for me.

[forcingtumbles]

I feel like im going insaaannneeeee

my mother had a VERY severe injury at the start of this month which will prevent her from walking independently for another 4 months at best. My brother and I (with lots of support from my husband, too) have been caring for her this entire time because she needs 24/7 assistance. My narcissistic father has taken her to doctors appointments throughout the month/stayed in the hospital during her multiple surgeries, but has otherwise probably contributed less than 24hrs of care to her across the entire month. He'll pick up 10 minutes here, 20 minutes there, and maybe take a 2hr nap in the same room as her every so often which frees my brother and I to leave the room for a few moments. But boy do we have to scrape for that support. He's also thrown two major blow-out tantrums since mom's accident:

#1) he threw things all over the place in front of my mom while screaming at her and inanimate objects right before mom had visitors over. He only partially cleaned it up in time.

#2) he screamed at her for like 5 uninterrupted minutes basically calling her stupid and unhelpful. And this was because she had been expressing concern that he wasn't working efficiently enough to meet a deadline for his home business-- a home business that hes sunk over half a million dollars into (almost every dollar of my parents savings) with no major profits to speak of (i think hes gained back like 100k across 10 years AT BEST).

He is incapable of completing the simplest tasks without asking her or me a dozen questions that we don't know the answers to because he has what is needed to complete the task-- reading instructions for "cooking" a simple breakfast, or reading symbols to determine if a dish is dishwasher safe, for instance. He even gave her a pile of clean clothes to help him fold despite the fact that she has to stay very still or else she worsens the pain of her leg injury.

And he is bitching about every simple menial task that the rest of us do without giving a second thought, like getting groceries.

To top it all off, he (surprise surprise) isn't paying an ounce of attention to my moms condition, physical or emotional. Today, a new development was that she became extraordinarily nauseous. He suggested three different times that she eat something within the span of like 30mins after she said she doesn't even wanna hear mention of food from being so extremely nauseous. That was at breakfast, then he did the exact same thing at dinner when she was even worse than beforewhich made her gag.

I wanna grab him by the shoulders and shake the egocentrism out of him.

Hes always hated me and fawned over my brother (which drives my brother up the wall from too much of his obnoxious attention). Anything i say to him, he spins into "You just dont think i can do anything right, ever!!" My brother is too conflict avoidant to stand up to him when hes making my mother or any of the rest of us miserable (which I can understand, seeing as we had to fend for ourselves emotionally growing up around such an active volcano of unpredictable emotions).

But my mother tolerates aaaallll of this and makes constant excuses. I think she might finally be seeing how little hes willing to do for her despite all that shes sacrificed for him, cuz in the past few years and particularly the past few days, she hasnt been as adamant about searching for excuses for his unforgivable behaviors and selfishness. When I was a religious child, I used to pray that they would divorce. I still dont think they will, but I sure hope that all this bullshit will at least illustrate to her that he has never loved any of us because hes too full of blind love for himself.

My husband has had a huge problem with my father in particular lately because we're supposed to be moving into a new place together. But instead, I'm having to dedicate myself to acting as my mother's spouse, "in sickness and health," because my father wont. Even before now, I've always played my mother's emotional spouse because my father is so emotionally and verbally abusive or neglectful. Im just sooooo sick of this shit. The entire family would have such an easier time taking care of my mom if my dad were just not in the picture at all, I swear.

Rant over sorry to clog any dashes

[almostbitchystarfish]

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[kyluxtrashpit]

Okay so. I know we talked a little in replies. So I also recognize that this post was perhaps written a bit more inflammatory than it was intended to. So I will ignore those sections and focus entirely on the facts, as I think some of what I said in the initial answer was expressed badly

I did not mean to imply the big shift of votes came in within the last 10 minutes. They came in within the last hour (again, I do not remember the time stamp - was it at 45 minutes left? 37? 20? I don’t remember, I didn’t take screenshots), but the biggest increase was seen within a roughly 10 minute span that was inside of that last hour

These screenshots actually support exactly what I and the others saw and have helped me pinpoint roughly when it happened. When I looked at the poll with about an hour left, there were about 1750-1850 votes (once again, I don’t remember precisely how many). With your screenshot, I can see that there was a reasonable increase from 1669 at 4 hours left to my number above at 1 hour left. Then, with your screenshot of 45 minutes left, you can see there’s a big jump of a few hundred from ~60 mins left to 45 mins left to bring it to just over 2000 votes. This is the section of time I would like more detail on because I believe that's when it happened

(And if anyone out there has screenshots or recordings or anything regarding the time period between 60 mins and 45 minutes remaining, I'd love to see it, because I believe that's roughly when the big, quick jump happened. Please send them)

Now, once again, is it possible these are legitimate? Yes, I said that in the ask, maybe someone rallied a small subreddit or a big discord server. Is it possible tumblr was just being fucky with the display somehow? Yeah, that could be true. I’ve never seen it with any other poll, but tumblr is a barely functional website, so anything is possible. But I think that I, and everyone else I spoke to (both before and after making this post, as several people have messaged me privately, either agreeing or disagreeing with my suspicions), has reason to believe that this is a suspicious increase given that ~10% of all the votes cast (most of that 10% being for hux, as you’ve handily shown here, because yes, others increased too, but he had a significantly larger increase, as you've clearly shown) appeared within the last hour. I think there is a fair chance that someone was acting unethically and I've outlined why. You can agree or disagree, that's your choice. You don't need a bot to add 2000 votes or something when the total votes are this small - a few hundred is all you need, why bother with doing more?

Now the last section, I did take this as being directed at me, and that's what got me heated earlier cause like. I am a kylux fan, I am a Hux fan lmao. At no point did I insult anyone, let alone people who like the same character I do. But based on our discussion elsewhere, I am now thinking this was meant for some people who actually were complaining. And thus I will not address it further unless you clarify to say that it was indeed intended for me

Overall my problem is, is if there was non-genuine interference from people on the same side as me, I’m going to say something about it. Because it’s wrong, pure and simple. If you think I’m incorrect, or don’t think I have enough evidence to be suspicious, that’s fine, that’s your choice, I said that in the ask. No one has to believe or agree with me. The initial post was a bit emotional, given I was upset that people in my fandom would do something like that, but at no point did I accuse anyone specific other than 'most likely a kyluxer', which, again, I AM one. I'm calling out my own people here because that's the right thing to do when you believe someone is up to no good

Other people saw the same things, some of which have also come to me privately after my first post. I will never reveal anyone who doesn't want to make their own public posts, so they will remain nameless unless they choose otherwise. I spoke out because these people were scared to, because it can lead to people being harassed, and I think that doing the right thing is more important than if a character I like wins an internet poll. You can disagree with that too if you want, but that is one you won't be able to convince me to change my mind on

Sooo, I’m not sure if this will make you feel any better about the whole poll drama disappointment, but I thought I’d let you know where I think some of this may have originated from and why I think the bots rumor started rather than there actually being bots (though I will get to that too).

(as a disclaimer: I’m speaking only from what I’ve seen from my neck of the (kylux) fandom woods; there could absolutely be other people involved that I’ve simply seen nothing from)

A person, who happens to ship kylux but has promoted to all fandoms with that character, has been having fun with the ‘hottest SW man poll’. They’ve been reblogging links to it along with entertaining little edits to promote their favorite character with the hope of getting people to take part in the vote. Now obviously they’re voting for that character themself, but anyone who happens to see the post are no more obligated than anyone else who reblogs/sees the poll to vote for that person’s preference. (I’m a kyluxer too, and I love both of them, but despite the promotions I still didn’t vote for him because that’s not my opinion for ‘hottest SW man’) And I don’t know about you, but I’m sure there have been many people, myself included, who have voted in a poll someone they follow reblogged for something that person liked and, despite not having a stake in it personally, cast said vote in deference to them. I’m sure that happened in some cases with this situation, however I’m also sure part of what happened is that fans who’d have otherwise never seen the poll were able to cast their vote (I’m in this category as I don’t follow these sorts of blogs at all), as well as – because it was put out in a fun, silly way – led them to vote when they might not have cared to bother otherwise.

Now, I do agree it’s kinda stretching the general spirit of these polls, however what they’ve been doing is only really different in that they’ve been adding character edits along with multiple reblogs in an attempt to make it a silly little attention-grabbing promotion thing rather than merely a reblog or two of the poll. Again, I do think it’s been a bit much, but I will say I can appreciate the enthusiasm of someone who thought they were having fun in their fandom with a simple ‘for fun’ fandom related poll. Another consideration to make is that this person might be new to these things (and/or tumblr in general), which could be a reason for it as well. Plus, different people are going to react to and participate in things in different ways, and sometimes those ways differ from the norm enough to cause a stir despite no ill will or actual ‘rule breaking’ meant.

Nevertheless, that isn’t botting. I can see why people might feel it’s a little unfair even if it’s only exaggerating behavior people already naturally have with polls. I can also certainly understand why it could lead to some people getting rubbed the wrong way and then feeling upset, thus further leading to a sense of drama and subsequent botting rumors (and the origin person being a kylux shipper leading to the kylux fandom as a whole being scapegoated). But still, that’s not the same as botting. In the end, neither you nor anyone else are obligated to no longer be upset simply because of this explanation. That’s your right and you don’t have to like this any more than genuine botting, I just wanted to clarify a potential source.

However, if there IS real botting, that’s indeed an absurd thing for someone to be doing for a simple poll. Perhaps someone got out of hand because of the above person’s promoting; perhaps it’s just a rumor started because some people simply weren’t expecting the character to receive enough votes to persist in the poll – and hey, everyone’s got their own preferences and opinions on ‘hotness’, but the fact a character some don’t think should be lingering over others has endured so long doesn’t necessarily mean there’s a conspiracy. Of course, I’m sure there are people who also have their own opinions on what might constitute ‘botting’ and have considered what I described to be in that category. Which is totally fine too. I personally disagree, but that’s merely my opinion and no one else has to accept it. For the most part, I merely believe this was a situation that got a little out of hand and led to a bit of drama that’s now negatively painting people who meant no harm – because it IS just a fun little fandom poll.

As for the numbers bumping in seemingly large chunks upon refreshing (I don’t even know how you could see individual numbers for an individual character???), I can only guess at how these polls bring in the numbers in order to calculate percentages, both continuous and final. Is it in delayed chunks? Is it really one by one by one exactness??? Perhaps a combination of both, somehow??? While on your end it might appear to be an immediate change after your vote (so a one by one idea), upon a refresh it might ACTUALLY be registering assorted votes in collected chunks, altering the newly refreshed percentage in a way that might seem huge based on what it was before/after your vote, but actually isn’t due to a collected recalculation of ALL new votes. And by individual character numbers, I’m not talking about that character's percentage, which is a percentage of a whole being recalculated upon that refresh. A whole which shifts percentages up and down throughout as the vote total increases regardless of minutes or hours. For a long-term example: he could be at a 13% high at one point because a number of that character’s voters voted around that time, heightening his numbers amongst the pool of votes, then a few hours later is at a 5% low because even more overall votes have come in since and his were few to none, and then later up to 9% as another batch of his voter’s participated. These ‘batches’ ostensibly have more to do with time zones/people online seeing the poll post and not botting. And in the short term you can apply this concept but with the ‘batches’ being overall votes that happen to have some chunks for that character mixed in.

Honestly, I don’t know if any of that is fully true or not; I’m just going off general observation of the polls and vaguely educated(?) guesswork. I could be totally wrong and that stupidly long paragraph is nonsense. Really this whole seemingly suspicious numbers thing is something I’d not seen or heard about at all until your post, so...I’ve no idea there. If botting is happening, and someone did get out of hand with this, I think it’s likely piggybacking off this above person’s attempt at fun engagement, thus tainting and casting blame on said person and, in particular, their ship fandom (which is quite unfair as not all his fans come from kylux, or even from pairings to begin with). And if there isn’t botting and it’s all a misunderstanding, then it’s still doing that to this person and the kylux fandom because of people’s upset and blame shifting onto the biggest pairing he’s in. Either way, it’s just a really unfortunate turn of events. (of course, I’m still merely speaking from my neck of the woods, there could be other stuff going on outside it that I don’t know anything about.)

In short, I suppose I just wanted to say: hey, it’s sad to see you (and others) feeling upset or disheartened by potential botting in a simple SW fandom poll with the potential origin being a kyluxer, and maybe this could help at least give you a different viewpoint and understanding of what might be going on behind the scenes. Still, yet again, neither you nor anyone else has to care about or agree with anything I’ve said, I simply felt a desire to do so as a follower of you, awareness of this poll, and a kyluxer myself.

So first off, I do appreciate your thoughtful response! And I'll clarify a bit on what I was talking about and why I made the statement. Now I will admit that I do not have 100% concrete proof of anything, what I have is my own observations, those observations confirmed by others, plus some information that is admittedly rumour, but is from people I trust who aren't the type to start shit and wouldn't say anything unless it was something they'd personally seen or had no reason to doubt

And I don't think recruiting friends outside the fandom to vote is botting or any other kind of cheating - it's not, everyone does that, I don't think that's an issue at all and is within fairness. What I'm talking about is actual botting, using fake accounts to vote. Which, if you have either the programming know how or a bit of money to pay for a bot that's pre-made, is a lot easier than people think it is. I know how one could do it manually, but I do not know enough about programming to automate it (and I won't explain how, because then it might give more people ideas lmao). I don't think this is widespread either, like one single person with the know how can 100% make hundreds accounts and have them vote within a few minutes. And, if they've ever botted a poll before, it's even faster because the accounts may have already been made

So it started with me watching the poll near the end (I voted within the first couple hours of it being posted, but I was curious how it would turn out). I refreshed with 45-60 minutes left and saw 'oh Hux is gonna lose, okay, too bad but it is what it is' because he was at ~8% and the next lowest was Anakin, who was just under 12%. As the time ticked down, I refreshed again and saw a sudden shift, which surprised me. At that point, I started refreshing every minute or so because it kept going, every refresh was a big jump even at that frequency. Within less than 10 minutes (I don't recall the exact timeframe, but it was very fast, too fast), the total vote count had increased by about 300 or so and I watched it surge with every refresh. The vast majority of these votes, if not all of them, were for Hux as his percentage was the only one that increased significantly (the rest increased by less than a full percentage point, if they didn't decrease)

So while you can't see how many votes went for each person, polls do have the total vote count at the bottom and you can see the percentages, so you can tell if there's a sudden increase in overall votes and if those affect on particular vote choice more than any other. Which is why I found this suspicious because that many votes, that quickly, overwhelmingly for one option, it's highly unlikely it was done by real humans. Plus, we've all seen what happens with big polls both here and on twitter - people have literally paid like $200 to bot polls before and it seems sadly to just be becoming something people do

After I saw that jump, I went and talked to some friends in a private discord we use for chatting and some of them, too, had been watching the poll and having similar suspicions to myself. A more tech-savvy one said this is the kind of increases that are consistent with the use of bots. A couple of people also mentioned they had heard people talking about botting, but weren't sure if that was a joke or not (and it may have been, even if there was botting, it may not have been these people). I can't reveal much more without compromising the identities of my friends, who didn't want to speak out about their suspicions because they don't want to get targeted or anything. I am far beyond caring about that lmao, so I chose to say something about it because idk this kind of thing just really irritates me and as a kyluxer for a very long time, I feel like it's the duty of people in a fandom to call out bad behaviour of our fellows in a rational, non-harassing way

Now, again, I admit none of this is concrete proof. And if I'm wrong and everything was above board and someone did manage to conjure a few hundred people all at the same time at the last minute, well, that's genuinely miraculous like unbelievably so lmao, so good for them. If so, I'll rescind the post, apologize, and go back to having fun. But from the pov of statistics, what I saw myself, what my friends saw, and the added rumours, like. I have to say that actual botting seems far more likely to me. You're welcome to disagree, or think this isn't enough evidence to say it for sure happened, but I wanted to say something regardless because if someone is botting, or even just thinking about it, maybe pointing it out will shame them into stopping so we can go back to having fun

I hope you're right and it wasn't happening, and hell, it may not have even been a kyluxer if it was (there are non-kylux Hux fans out there), but I just find it hard to believe it wasn't happening at this point between what I saw, what others saw, and what I heard. And I think it's better to point out fandom bad behaviour than let it continue unchecked. I refuse to let that kinda shit happen if I can do something about it