#all that to say is my head I love to imagine him happy

[cherryxbooo]

I’ll do anything to make you happy

Summary: You were excited for winter break to start because it meant one thing: spending more time with Lando. But little did you know, that was the one thing you wouldn't be getting.

Reader x Lando Norris

Genre: fluff/angst

Winter always held a special kind of charm for me.

The frosty mornings, cozy blankets, and steaming cups of cocoa had always made this season my favorite.

But this year, it held a different promise: Lando finally had a break from racing.

After months of hectic schedules, jet-setting across the globe, and stolen moments in between races, I was looking forward to having him all to myself.

At first, it was everything I’d imagined and more.

We spent lazy mornings tangled in bed, with me teasing him about his messy hair while he pulled me closer, claiming I was his personal heater.

Breakfasts turned into brunches because we couldn’t stop talking or joking around.

We watched movies, baked cookies that turned out terrible, and played endless rounds of Mario Kart, which I always managed to win.

“You’re only winning because I’m letting you,” Lando said one evening, his grin teasing as he tossed the controller onto the couch.

“Sure you are,” I replied, laughing as I grabbed my victory snack from the table.

Those first few days felt like we were in our own little world, where nothing else mattered but us.

But soon, reality began creeping in.

It started innocently enough.

“Babe, Max just called,” Lando said one morning, leaning against the counter with his coffee mug in hand.

“He’s organizing a karting session. Shouldn’t take long.”

I smiled, my heart swelling with pride.

Racing was his passion, and I loved seeing him happy. “Go have fun. Just don’t let him beat you.”

“Never,” he said with a wink, kissing my temple quickly before heading out.

That day, I didn’t mind the quiet. I worked on some projects, caught up with friends, and even took a long bath.

By the time he got home, his cheeks were flushed with cold, and he couldn’t stop talking about how much fun he’d had.

But karting soon turned into golf.

Golf turned into poker nights. And poker nights turned into outings that stretched late into the night.

“I’ll be back soon,” he’d text, always with a heart emoji. But “soon” became later and later each time.

I told myself it was fine. He deserved this break.

He’d worked so hard all year, and if spending time with his friends helped him unwind, who was I to complain?

But as the days wore on, the house began to feel emptier, and so did I.

One evening, I decided to surprise him with his favorite dinner.

I spent hours in the kitchen, setting the table with candles and dimming the lights for a cozy atmosphere.

When Lando walked through the door, his expression softened as he took in the setup.

“You didn’t have to do all this,” he said, wrapping his arms around me.

“I wanted to,” I replied, smiling up at him.

“You’ve been so busy, and I thought it’d be nice to have a quiet night together.”

“That’s so sweet,” he said, leaning down to kiss me.

“But the guys are waiting for me. I promised I’d meet them for drinks tonight. Let’s rain check this?”

My smile faltered, but I nodded. “Of course.”

He kissed me again and was out the door before I could say anything more.

I sat down at the table, staring at the empty chair across from me.

The candles flickered, their light reflecting off the untouched plates. I took a deep breath, telling myself it was okay.

But deep down, a tiny crack had formed in my heart.

Days turned into weeks, and the cracks only deepened.

Lando’s absence became more noticeable, and I began to feel like a ghost in our own home.

One evening, after scrolling through endless photos of him with his friends on Instagram, I called Mia, my best friend.

“What’s wrong?” she asked the moment she picked up.

I sighed, the weight of my emotions pressing down on me.

“It’s Lando. He’s been spending so much time with his friends lately, and I feel like I’m… invisible.”

Mia was quiet for a moment before saying, “Y/N, you’re not invisible. But you need to talk to him. He’s not a mind reader.”

“I don’t want to seem clingy,” I admitted, my voice barely above a whisper.

“You’re not clingy. You’re his girlfriend. He should want to spend time with you. Talk to him.”

Her words gave me the push I needed. That night, when Lando came home, I gathered my courage.

“Can we talk?” I asked, my heart pounding in my chest.

“Of course,” he said, sitting down next to me.

I took a deep breath.

“I’ve been feeling… neglected lately. I know you’re enjoying your break, and I want you to have fun, but I miss us. I miss you.”

He frowned, reaching for my hand.

“Babe, I’m sorry if it feels that way. But I’m here now, aren’t I?”

I nodded, but his words didn’t ease the ache in my chest. Before I could say more, he kissed me and stood up.

“Max needs help with something,” he said, grabbing his keys. “Love you!”

And just like that, he was gone. Again.

I tried my best to push away all negative thoughts until I thought about the positive ones.

Our second anniversary was just days away, and I held onto the hope that he’d make it special.

I told myself the late nights didn’t matter. He was probably planning something incredible for our anniversary.

The next day,

The morning light filtered through the curtains, painting the room in soft golden hues.

I stretched lazily, a content smile curling my lips as I reached across the bed.

My fingers met cold sheets. The space beside me was empty.

I frowned, the giddy excitement I had woken up with faltering.

Today was our second anniversary.

I had imagined waking up wrapped in Lando’s arms, whispering sleepy “Happy anniversary” wishes before sharing breakfast together.

Instead, he was gone.

I also realized that I hadn't heard him come back last night.

He told me he was just helping Max out with something, but he probably went out partying with his friends afterward, again.

I tried to shake off the disappointment as I climbed out of bed, brushing my hair out of my face.

Maybe he had planned a surprise and needed to step out early.

A flutter of hope lifted my spirits as I grabbed my robe and headed toward the kitchen.

The scent of coffee greeted me, but there was no sign of Lando.

Instead, on the counter, I found a note written in his familiar scrawl:

“Gone golfing with the guys. Be back later. Love you.”

My heart sank. Golfing? On our anniversary?

I swallowed the lump rising in my throat, trying to focus on the fact that he had said he’d be back later.

He wouldn’t forget our dinner, right?

We’d planned this evening together weeks ago, and I’d been looking forward to it ever since.

I folded the note and placed it aside, telling myself not to overthink it. He would be back in time.

He promised.

After a quick breakfast, I set to work preparing for the evening.

My heart thudded with a mix of excitement and nervousness as I laid out my plans.

Lando had been so busy lately, and this was my chance to remind him how much I loved him, despite everything.

I spent hours in the kitchen, cooking all his favorite dishes: his go-to pasta, a roasted chicken dish he always requested, and even the dessert I’d failed at three times before finally perfecting.

The smells of herbs, garlic, and chocolate filled the apartment, making it feel warm and inviting.

Between stirring pots and chopping vegetables, I took breaks to set up the dining table.

I draped it with a soft cream tablecloth, adding candles and a scattering of rose petals for a romantic touch.

Fairy lights hung along the walls, casting a cozy glow that made the space feel magical.

On the counter, I carefully placed his gift, a sleek watch he had admired months ago but never bought for himself.

Not forgetting to attach a handwritten note to the box.

With everything ready, I checked the clock.

It was almost evening. So I had to hurry up to get ready.

I slipped into the dress I had chosen weeks ago, a soft, fitted number I knew he loved on me.

My makeup was simple yet elegant, and I added the finishing touch, a spritz of the perfume Lando had gifted me for my last birthday.

I felt beautiful, excited, and nervous all at once as I sat on the couch, watching the clock.

Five minutes passed. Then ten.

By the time twenty minutes had gone by, I grabbed my phone, texting him a quick, “Hey, are you on your way?”

No response.

An hour later, I texted again. Then called. Still nothing.

My excitement turned into a gnawing worry that sat heavy in my chest.

Where was he? Had he forgotten?

Two hours passed.

The candles on the table had burned down halfway, their flickering flames reflecting off the now-cold plates of food.

The fairy lights, once magical, now felt like mockery.

Finally, three hours later, I gave up.

Tears stung my eyes as I blew out the candles, packed away the food, and removed my dress, exchanging it for soft pajamas.

My makeup was smeared with tears by the time I climbed into bed.

I grabbed my phone one last time, and my heart shattered when I saw the Instagram story.

It was one of Lando’s friends, showing a clip of him laughing, drink in hand, surrounded by his friends.

He looked happy. Carefree.

And completely oblivious that tonight was our anniversary.

The tears came faster, hot and uncontrollable. I buried my face in the pillow, the ache in my chest overwhelming.

I had been so sure he’d come back, that he’d remember. But I was wrong.

Later that night,

The apartment was cloaked in silence when Lando opened the front door, the click of the lock echoing faintly in the stillness.

He stumbled inside the weight of exhaustion and faint traces of guilt tugging at his chest.

The soft glow of the streetlights outside illuminated the darkened space just enough for him to make out his surroundings.

Something felt… off.

He reached for the light switch, and as the room was bathed in warm light, his eyes landed on the dining table across from him.

He froze.

The table was beautifully decorated, candles placed strategically, now melted into small stubs, surrounded by rose petals that had been artfully scattered.

Plates of food were neatly covered with lids to keep them from going bad, but even from a distance, Lando could tell they were his favorites.

He took a tentative step forward, his stomach sinking further with each movement.

Resting near the center of the table was a small, wrapped box with a note attached to it.

The sight made his chest tighten, a creeping realization clawing at the edges of his mind.

His fingers trembled as he picked up the note. Unfolding it carefully, he read the words in her familiar handwriting:

"To my Lando, the best thing that ever happened to me. Thank you for being my partner, my love, my everything. Happy anniversary, baby. Love, Y/N."

The words hit him like a punch to the gut. His heart sank as the full weight of the evening’s significance crashed over him.

Anniversary. He’d forgotten their second anniversary.

Lando stood there, the note still clutched in his hand, his throat tightening as shame washed over him.

He thought back to the past few weeks, to the times he’d brushed you off or come home late without so much as an explanation.

He couldn’t even recall the last time you two spent real, quality time together.

You had tried to talk to him about it, about how you felt neglected, and he had dismissed your concerns every single time.

Now, standing there amidst the evidence of your effort and love, he felt like the worst boyfriend in the world.

Lando exhaled shakily, running a hand through his hair as regret threatened to overwhelm him.

He couldn’t blame anyone but himself.

He glanced around the room, noticing how quiet it was. He knew you were asleep.

His eyes landed on his phone, dead from the night’s events.

With a heavy sigh, he plugged it into the charger, pacing nervously as he waited for it to turn back on.

When it finally lit up, the screen was flooded with notifications, missed calls and unread messages from Y/N.

The time stamps told the story of your evening:

“Hey, are you on your way?” - 8 p.m. “I’m waiting for you… everything’s ready.” -8:30 p.m. “Lando, please call me.” -9 p.m. “Are you okay? I’m starting to worry.” -10 p.m.

The last message was hours old, her tone shifting from hopeful to concerned.

Each notification felt like another jab to his heart, the guilt almost unbearable.

He dropped his phone onto the counter and made his way toward their shared bedroom.

Pushing the door open quietly, he stepped into the dimly lit room.

His gaze immediately found her curled up under the covers, her face half-buried in the pillow.

His breath hitched when he noticed the faint streaks on her cheeks, traces of tears she hadn’t been able to hide.

The sight made his heart clench painfully. She’d cried herself to sleep, and it was his fault.

Lando approached the bed slowly, kneeling beside her as he took in her tear-streaked face.

She looked so peaceful yet so vulnerable, her chest rising and falling softly with each breath.

Guilt swirled in his chest as he reached out, brushing a strand of hair away from her face.

“I’m so sorry, baby,” he whispered, his voice barely audible, thick with regret.

Leaning down, he pressed a gentle kiss to her temple, lingering for a moment as if hoping it could somehow convey all the apologies he couldn’t say while she was awake.

His thumb grazed her cheek, and he sighed deeply.

“You didn’t deserve this,” he murmured, his voice breaking.

“I’ve been such an ass… the worst boyfriend. I’ll make it up to you, I promise. I love you so much.”

She stirred slightly at his touch but didn’t wake.

Lando watched her for a moment longer before standing, his mind racing with plans to fix what he’d broken.

Tomorrow, he vowed, would be all about her.

The next morning, I woke up with a dull ache in my chest, my body heavy from the night before.

My eyes were sore and puffy from crying myself to sleep.

I glanced at the empty side of the bed, already prepared for the familiar sting of disappointment.

Figured he’d leave again before I woke up, I thought bitterly.

Dragging myself out of bed, I moved to the bathroom to freshen up.

The cold water on my face didn’t do much to wash away the exhaustion or the emotional weight from the previous night.

With a sigh, I tied my hair back and made my way downstairs, expecting another day of hurt to unfold.

Halfway down the stairs, though, something unusual stopped me in my tracks.

The smell of coffee, rich and inviting, wafted through the air.

There was another scent too, pancakes? My brow furrowed in confusion.

"That can’t be right. Lando doesn’t cook... does he? Who am i kidding he can't even boil eggs."

I cautiously descended the rest of the stairs, each step filling me with equal parts curiosity and hesitation.

As I rounded the corner into the kitchen, I froze at the sight before me.

There he was, standing by the stove, flipping a pancake with a focused but slightly clumsy determination.

Plates of food lined the table, croissants, fresh fruit, juice, and what looked like store-bought pastries.

It didn’t take long to figure out most of the spread wasn’t homemade, but the effort was unmistakably his.

“Morning, love,” Lando greeted me, his tone soft and tentative, his lips curling into a nervous smile.

I raised an eyebrow, my arms crossing instinctively. “What’s all this?”

He put the spatula down and stepped closer, wiping his hands on a kitchen towel.

“It’s breakfast... and an apology,” he said, his voice earnest.

My eyes flickered between him and the spread on the table.

I could see he was trying, but the hurt from last night still lingered like a heavy cloud over my chest.

“Come sit,” he said gently, pulling a chair out for me.

I hesitated for a moment before sitting down, my arms still crossed defensively.

Lando grabbed a plate, placing a pancake in front of me before adding a small pile of fruit and a croissant on the side.

I eyed him suspiciously as he poured me a cup of coffee, then sat across from me.

“What are you doing, Lando?” I asked, my voice tinged with a mix of confusion and frustration.

He leaned forward, resting his elbows on the table as he met my gaze.

“I messed up, Y/N. Big time. And I need you to know how sorry I am.” His voice was steady but filled with regret.

I stayed silent, waiting for him to continue.

“Last night,” he began, his brows furrowing,

“I forgot our anniversary. I forgot the one day I should’ve been making you feel like the most important person in the world. And it’s not just last night, I’ve been neglecting you for weeks. You told me how you felt, and I brushed it off like an idiot.”

His voice cracked slightly as he spoke, and I could see the weight of his guilt etched into every line on his face.

“I’ve been selfish, caught up in my own world, and I didn’t see how much I was hurting you. You deserve so much better than that, Y/N. Better than me.”

I felt my throat tighten as his words sank in. The sincerity in his tone chipped away at the walls I’d put up.

“I was so hurt, Lando,” I said, my voice trembling.

“I waited for you all night. I planned everything because I thought… I thought you’d come home and we’d celebrate together. I stayed up, hoping you’d walk through that door with a smile, ready to tell me how much you love me. But you didn’t.”

Tears pricked my eyes as I continued.

“I saw that video of you and your friends. You were laughing and having fun while I sat here, alone, on what was supposed to be our night.”

Lando’s face fell, his hands gripping the edge of the table as if grounding himself from the weight of my words.

“I know,” he whispered.

“And I hate myself for it. Seeing what you did for me last night, the decorations, the food, the note. I realized just how much I’ve been taking you for granted. I never want you to feel that way again, Y/N. You’re the most important thing in my life. I need you to believe that.”

He reached into his pocket and pulled out a small box, sliding it across the table to me.

“What’s this?” I asked, my voice softer now, though my heart still carried the sting of last night.

“Open it,” he urged.

I carefully lifted the lid, revealing a delicate necklace with a sparkling pendant.

The intricate design caught the morning light, making it shimmer.

“Lando…” I trailed off, overwhelmed.

“It’s not enough to make up for what I’ve done,” he said quickly,

“but it’s a start. And today, it’s all about you. Whatever you want to do, wherever you want to go, we’ll do it.”

I stared at the necklace for a moment before meeting his eyes.

“It’s beautiful,” I said, my voice thick with emotion. “Thank you.”

“But,” I added, my tone firm, “this doesn’t mean I’ve fully forgiven you yet.”

“I know,” he said, nodding.

“And I don’t expect you to. But I’ll spend every day proving to you how much I care, how much I love you. I won’t stop until you believe me again.”

The determination in his voice made my chest tighten.

I wanted to hold onto my anger, to make him feel the depth of my hurt, but seeing him now, vulnerable, regretful, and desperate to make things right.

I couldn’t help but feel the smallest crack in my resolve.

As the morning unfolded, Lando’s sincerity shone through.

He insisted on clearing the table and cleaning up, stealing small glances at me as if trying to gauge my mood.

I wasn’t ready to let go of all the hurt just yet, but for the first time in weeks, I felt a glimmer of hope.

Maybe, just maybe, we could find our way back to each other.

The morning's heartfelt apology set the tone for what became one of the most memorable days Lando and I had spent together in weeks.

While I was still guarded, I couldn’t deny that he was trying, really trying, to make things right.

As I got ready to leave the house, he was already by my side, holding my hand, his other arm slung casually around my shoulder.

“I promised today would be all about you,” he said, giving me that signature soft smile.

“So, where to first?”

We started with a trip to the mall. At first, I felt a little awkward, hesitant to fully enjoy the experience.

But Lando was like a lovesick puppy, following me from store to store, holding my bags, and insisting I buy anything that caught my eye.

“Do you like this dress?” I asked, holding up a flowy sundress against myself.

“I love it,” he said without hesitation. “But I’d probably love anything on you.”

I rolled my eyes at his smooth comment but couldn’t help the blush creeping up my cheeks. “You’re just saying that.”

“Nope,” he replied, grabbing the dress and adding it to the pile of things he’d insisted on buying.

From clothes to accessories, he didn’t say no to anything.

When I protested, saying he was spending too much, he brushed it off.

“I’d spend everything on you, Y/N,” he said with such sincerity it made my heart ache.

Afterward, he took me to my favorite café for lunch.

The cozy little place was one we often went to in the early days of our relationship, and the nostalgia hit me hard as we sat down.

“I missed this,” I admitted as I sipped my coffee.

“Me too,” Lando said, reaching across the table to hold my hand.

“And I’m going to make sure we never lose this again.”

Next, he surprised me with a visit to a local pottery studio.

I couldn’t help but laugh when Lando struggled to shape a vase, the clay slipping through his fingers.

“Okay, you’re supposed to keep your hands steady,” I teased, leaning over to guide him.

“Oh, so now you’re an expert?” he joked, though his grin softened as I showed him how to shape the clay.

It was messy, chaotic, and perfect.

By the end, we both had clay smudged on our faces, and we were laughing like we hadn’t in weeks.

From there, we stopped at a flower shop.

Lando picked out the biggest bouquet of my favorite flowers, holding it out to me with a boyish grin.

“For you,” he said, like it was the most natural thing in the world.

“You’re really pulling out all the stops today, aren’t you?” I teased, though my heart swelled as I buried my nose in the fragrant blooms.

“Only the best for my girl,” he replied, his tone playful but his eyes serious.

For the rest of the day, he didn’t leave my side.

He held my hand as we walked through the streets, his arm draped protectively around me whenever we stopped to rest.

He peppered me with kisses at every opportunity; on my cheek, my forehead, my temple.

“You’re being extra clingy today,” I said with a small laugh as he pulled me into another hug.

“Making up for lost time,” he murmured, his chin resting on the top of my head.

Bit by bit, the walls I’d built around my heart began to crumble.

His efforts felt genuine, and I found myself smiling more easily, the hurt from the night before slowly fading into the background.

By the time we got home, the sun was setting, painting the sky in soft shades of pink and orange.

We were both tired but happy as we curled up on the couch together.

Lando tucked me under his arm, his fingers gently tracing patterns on my shoulder.

“Y/N,” he said after a long moment of silence.

His tone was serious, and I looked up at him curiously.

“Yeah?”

“I need to say this again because you deserve to hear it,” he began, his voice steady but filled with emotion.

“I’m so sorry for everything, for neglecting you, for forgetting our anniversary, for making you feel like you weren’t my priority. You are my priority, Y/N. You’re the best thing in my life, and I hate that I made you feel otherwise.”

His words hit me straight in the chest, and I felt tears pricking at the corners of my eyes.

“I know I hurt you,” he continued, his hand cupping my cheek as he looked into my eyes.

“But I swear, I’ll spend every day proving how much I love you. I’ll never let you feel like that again.”

My heart felt full as I reached up to hold his hand.

“You’ve done a lot for me today, Lando,” I said softly.

“And it’s helped. I can see how much you mean it.”

“So... does that mean you forgive me?” he asked, his tone hopeful but cautious.

I smiled, leaning up to kiss him. “Yeah, I forgive you.”

The relief on his face was almost comical, and he immediately began peppering my face with kisses, my cheeks, my forehead, my nose, even the corners of my lips.

“Thank you, thank you, thank you,” he murmured between kisses, his joy infectious.

Just when I thought the day was over, Lando suddenly sat up.

“Wait, I have one last thing,” he said, standing and disappearing into the other room.

I frowned, confused, as he returned with a small envelope in hand.

“What is this?” I asked as he handed it to me.

“Open it,” he urged, a playful but nervous glint in his eyes.

I carefully tore open the envelope, and my breath caught as I pulled out two plane tickets.

My eyes widened as I read the destination: Maldives.

“Lando… are you serious?” I asked, my voice trembling with disbelief.

He grinned. “You’ve always said you wanted to go. So, I booked us a two-week stay. Just you and me. No distractions.”

Tears welled in my eyes as I looked at him, overwhelmed.

“You didn’t have to do this…”

“Yes, I did,” he said firmly, pulling me into his arms.

“I’ll do anything to make you happy, Y/N. Anything.”

I hugged him tightly, burying my face in his chest.

“Thank you,” I whispered.

“I love you,” he murmured, pressing a kiss to the top of my head.

“I love you too,” I replied, my voice muffled but sincere.

We settled back into the couch, cuddled up together, the weight of the past few weeks finally lifting.

After a long silence, I broke it with a playful smile.

“If you ever neglect me like that again, I’m breaking up with your ass,” I teased.

Lando laughed, his arms tightening around me. “Fair enough. But don’t worry, I won’t. Not ever again.”

And for the first time in weeks, I believed him.

The end

[h5eavenly]

Stargirl - han jisung.

A small birthday present for my favorite person @stargirl-gigi <3 i love you so much more than words could ever explain and i'm so thankful for your existence. Happy birthday my love 🤍🤍

11:50 P.M

The screen of your phone stares back at you, glaringly bright in the darkness of your own room. It’s nearly midnight, hours treading towards the end of your birthday and you tell yourself you should be lolling into sleep by now. And yet it’s persisting in its visit. It feels unjust, specifically after spending almost the entirety of your day outside. Your laughter filling the streets with happiness and surrounded by the love infused chatter of your friends. So much love.

Albeit the moment you stumbled into your bed it’s like today was nothing more than an imagination that you had swiped through without much thought. There’s bitterness that lingers in your mouth, a longing forcing your heart to weep out in pathetic unanswered callings. You crack open your window, ushering the moonlight in and pretend you don’t know what your heart is crying for.

It's all deemed worthless the moment your phone dings – with a ringtone you had set specifically for him – You have told yourself you should change it multiple times. Tried to convince yourself that you shouldn't back yourself in a corner with how specially different you treat him.

Alas here you are.

11:55 P.M

Your eyes widen ever so slightly, your heart picking speed and you curse yourself for the anticipation coursing through your fingers. Urging you to peek at your phone, to feed the gaping hole pulsating in the middle of your chest. An ever so foolish yearning heart. And perhaps the moonlight is only another witness to you kicking your pride under your bed, and perhaps it will cackle at you if it ever spoke, perhaps the way it shines brighter once you sit up and reach for your phone on the bedside table is all in your head.

Jisung: Are you awake?

You don’t reply and he doesn’t say it, but you know, you always know and so when you’re out of your bed and opening the door to your apartment next. Jisung is standing outside, shrouded in a gray hoodie you have seen him in way too many times. You’re almost breathless when your eyes meet, and you only pray the moon won’t snitch on you. Spilling all your longing throughout the light that infiltrates his dark hair strands and you pray your eyes don’t betray your missing when he smiles with the same bitterness that lingered in you all night.

11:59 P.M

“Happy birthday.” He whispers, softly and tenderly. It’s cruelled in the way it drowns you in the depths of your emotions yet again. Bringing them back to life with newfound intensity and all the cruses you have memorized all day long dwindle down on your tongue. Melting away with all the anger and resentment you have mastered up all these past months you have not seen him.

A braver version of you, one that isn’t stitched together by an aching need for him and an even deeper ache to look at him would slam the door shut in his face. The you right now welcomes him in your space like there’s no other place for him to belong.

Silence is heavy as it paints the air, you awkwardly move the boxes of gifts you have gotten and Jisung lingers behind just as bunglingly. Pushing down his hood and ruffling his hair. Every sound feels intensified; his breathing has chills running down your spine.

“Is that a ghostface action figure?” His tone is woven with excitement, and you follow his gaze.

“Yeah...” You mumble, your tone is heavier than you’d like, and it dims his excitement. You avert your eyes elsewhere, somewhere far from him and yet not far enough it seems because you almost hear your heart screaming for him.

“Looks sick.” He replies, quieter and tinted with suffocation, the same one circling in the air and you let out a breath just as quiet as your eyes find him.

You hold your longing in your throat, in your stomach and the leash of restraint triggers. You closed your eyes, sealed your lips for far too long and right in this moment when he looks back at you, gaze clouded with a different million emotions you’re splitting open. Vomiting heartbreak, sharpened by a feverish urge to have him all to yourself.

“Why weren’t you there?” you ask, and his eyes widen ever so slightly, ever so temporarily as if he wasn’t expecting you to ask. And then a nervous chuckle is pushed out his lips – humorless – as he scratches his neck.

“I was busy working at the studio.” It’s an empty excuse, you know it by now, have known it for the past months he kept uttering it to you over and over again.

“Changbin and Bangchan were there. Everyone else was there but you.” you should let it go. You’re aware digging at this will only ever result in pain and yet you can’t stop not when the clock ticks 12 and you have grown numb from waiting.

“I’m sorry…” He speaks after a few lingering moments of silence and his eyes are drifting, fleeting in their hold onto you. You almost want to scoff. The darkness remains and the moon cackles at you again. His eyes are always running away from you, and you’d rather be buried than yearning.

“I haven’t seen you in months,” you say, wishing it came out as a berate but instead it’s weakened by your eyes – filled with twisted desire – one that feels like you’re not allowed to feel “are you avoiding me?” you ask, pressing for answers, something that will end this suffering of yours, something that will help you not feel like a mere notch of time.

“I’m really sorry.” This time you scoff out loud and you wish for answers rather than apologies. It’s why you’re kneeling into silence that doesn’t stretch long enough for you to gather up your emotions and lock them up.

You have kept yourself locked away for so long so why tonight of all times seems to feel like a failing task. An impossible one that you cannot seem to master.

“Do you just not want me in your life anymore?” you whisper, looking down and chewing on your bottom lip as if you’re afraid the louder your voice will get the harsher the truth tumbling out his lips will be. The harsher they will cut.

You’d rather be buried than yearning.

Because truth is you have been in love with Jisung for as long as you remember. You belonged to him the moment you laid eyes on him and haven’t been able to take back your pieces ever since. Not that you wished to anyways. It was a scary feeling, inflating so big inside of you as if it was always there, as if it just needed the sunray to bloom and his smile was all it took. Before you knew it your heart felt deserted without him and love for him exists within you like the lines across your palms. And yet you’re so scared to look at him and witness your worst nightmares come to life. It’s one that you thought of a lot of times before, one that had you curling up in anxiety and calling for him alone; losing him.

It's the sole reason you sacrificed your soul. Stamped with foolish lies like being friends with him as if you hadn’t looked at him with the devotion of a lover.

In a mere moment Jisung has closed the distance between you two, a look of betrayal on his face as if he can’t believe what you said and you wonder why he’s stepping on your heart as if you just didn’t offer it to him.

“How could you say that?” his eyes are widened with a tempest of confusion and when your eyes dart between his, the air feels heavier as it travels through your lungs. The space between you two is not small enough and yet you’re closer to choking than anything “How could you say that to me I- holy fuck do you even realize – “his words are tangled and messy like wildflowers. Scattered and lost with meaning, direction and it’s thanks to the way you keep looking up at him so softly. His ribcage tightens around his heart, and he lets out a breath “I wrote you a song.”

“What?” your brows furrow and he runs his hand through his hair. Something akin to frustration coming to life in the knot between his.

“I wrote you a song because I couldn’t fucking stop thinking about you and now you – “ he stops himself and your heart starts beating impossibly fast, a song that’s only ever breathed to life whenever you’re around him and you feel your longing, yearning explode. Spreading across your face and seeping into your eyes and they’re begging “Never mind.” He breaths, rushed and draping its disappointment on you “I should go i- I don’t know.”

Before you have enough time to gather a singular word that he said he’s already turning away from you. Your feet are glued to the ground with strives to wrap your head around the mess you two seem to constantly find yourselves in. A beat, then a second and for an evanescent split second you wonder if you should let him go. If perhaps all these bent up feelings that have been collecting are nothing but a rope of poison slowly strangling you to death. But rather anything you’re a slave to your heart.

What are you if not over loving, over feeling?

By the time you’re after him, hand curled around his wrist it is already too late, Jisung has a part of you and you’re shaking your head.

“Don’t go.” You tell him and his expression breaks into the same longing you watch in the mirror every passing moment he’s not here “Stay and tell me. Sing me your song.” You say, ask, wish, pray and it’s all between your teeth. All these wishes you have been keeping score of and it is too late.

Your touch burns his wrist, and his own charade falls apart faster than your blink of an eye. It’s like the minute you touch him everything is crumbling and he’s no longer pressing down on his neck to keep it together. In his dreams you’re a secret he can’t tell anyone about but right now he’s backing you into the nearest wall with his hands cradling your face as if you’re the most precious thing he had the pleasure of touching. The world narrows down to nothing but the ringing of your heartbeat in your ears and his shaky breaths. The space between your lips is almost nonexistent and you’re exchanging breaths like a drowned soul coming up for air.

“You have no idea what you do to me. Do you?” he whispers and it’s not really a question rather a declaration. Pulled from the depths of his being and you welcome it with warmth.

“Jisung..” your hot breath is fanning across his lips and he swallows back nothing, feel your eyes squeeze the last drop of sanity he was holding onto. He rests his forehead against yours “Shh. Shh” His hand slowly travels from your cheek to your palm, holding it tenderly and placing it atop where his heart is

“Can you feel that?” he asks breathlessly, gaze pouring into yours as you feel his wild heartbeat reverberates against your palm. A stranger urge to tattoo every beat into your essence has your eyes softening.

“Yes.” You whisper back timidly and then you’re leaning closer, nose brushing against his “Me too.” You tell him, closing your eyes “I feel the same.”

“No.” He shakes his head, squeezing your palm on his chest “You don’t understand. What I feel for you is- nothing like a human can feel. It’s something out of this world. I-“ A labored breath, and his fingers tremble around your cheek that only could be an evidence of love, such yearning. It drips from his eyes when you look at him “You make me want to rearrange the stars and place you in between them.” He confesses and the way your eyes fill with tears quickly could only be an unveiling of your own feelings, laced with something so you, something he’s so addicted to.

Jisung has never been good at speaking his feelings but you, you make him want to try and fail only to try again, only to spill your name across every star. Scribble your words into every poem and there’s no love if not for you.

“All I think about is you – all I think about is loving you. you have consumed me completely. I don’t know –“ he’s drawing you closer, his heartbeat accelerating as his lips almost touch yours “I don’t know what it’s like not to love you and I’m scared I’m gonna regret this. I’m scared I’m gonna scare you away but fuck-”

“You will never scare me away Jisung.” Your mumbles are comfort spreading its wings across his chest and he shakes his head again with a strangled huff, pushed out with deafened ears and an overwhelming intensity that wraps around his fragile heart.

“I don’t think you understand I don’t think you’re listening to me – “

“I am Jisung. I am listening.”

“No, no.” he cradles your face closer to his with a shush. Both of you are breathing heavily as if oxygen have been sucked from the room, fled somewhere unreachable if not between your mouths “I love you. do you know what that means? Do you know what it’s like to stop talking to you for months in hopes of forgetting you? only to end up feeling like a fucking loser because I can’t write anything if it’s not about you? do you understand?” there’s desperation woven in his tone, tinting his gaze when he finally captures yours and then they’re softening like melted candle wax.

Like a blazing fire, burning for you and you thread your fingers through the spaces between his, right atop his heart. If you listen closely, you swear you could hear whispers – callings of your name.

“I understand.” You smile and it blankets his being with warmth, his stars shine brighter “I feel the same.” You whisper hoarsely against his lips and right before your eyelids fall shut, he sees the moon glistening and he finally surrenders, closing the space between you two and interlocking his lips with yours.

It’s unhurried – tender as if the time of the world is in the palm of his hands and he can bend it to his will. A sweetness spreads throughout your limbs, like honey despite the salty rivulets of tears across your cheeks.

“Say it.” He murmurs between kisses, whiny and desperate as he presses you further into the wall, wishing he could melt his body onto you, wanting, no, knowing he’s nothing but a part of you “Tell me you feel the same.”

“I love you too,” you tell him and for the first time in a long time you feel touched and not harmed. For the first time you don’t need to swallow down his name but rather speak it into the world because the sun will not shine, this night shall last for an eternity.

“Again,” he asks, pulling back enough to rest his forehead against yours. His heart aches not in despair for you but in prayers that this isn’t some stupid dream of his and if he did somehow only have you in his dream he hopes to never wake up.

“I love you.” you answer with your thumb swiping across his cheek, and he shudders.

“Again. Tell me again.” His chest heaves and you understand, how one lifetime isn’t close to enough “Please tell me again.” Your hands are gentle on him, they move like water and when you lean forward pressing kisses into his cheek, trailing a map of affection that leads to his mouth and then you’re kissing him once, twice and the third comes with a whisper, a promise.

“I love you Jisung.”

He stays and just like you had hoped night feels like it stretches long enough for him to imprint every word of love on every part of your skin. The walls of your bedroom memorize every sound, every whisper and when you’re drifting to sleep with your head buried in the crook of his neck. He’s humming a song; your song and you’re too drowned in exhaustion to focus really, yet the lyrics echo in your mind over and over again. A lullaby that has your heart singing along and your essence tangling with his.

My heart’s gone out of it,

I wander the streets in search of something I can’t find

But then you are here, and I am with you

There you are, my Stargirl.

[mikkomacko]

I need some more of reader and John moments bc🤭 loving for it

If you asked Nico a year ago what he'd be doing today, he sure as hell wouldn't have said this. Thinking back on it, he can't even begin to imagine what that poor sap of his former self would even say.

'Driving the girl I'm sleeping with but also care about six hours all the way to Pittsburgh to pick up John fucking Marino who she just so happened to fucking love.'

Yeah right, he thinks bitterly.

Your foot nudges his elbow, sock clad toes pressing right into the soft spot of his funny bone. Nico takes one hand off the steering wheel, grabbing at your toes and pinching just hard enough to make you jolt. Giggling, you spring away from his hands, feet falling from the center console and he feels that tiny moment of bitterness fade away.

Especially when you pop your head into the front seat, cheek pressing into his bicep.

"You're supposed to be buckled." Nico scolds lightheartedly, an endeared smile rising on his lips when you nuzzle into the soft skin on the underside of his arm.

"I wanted to say hi."

He scoffs. "You should've sat up here then."

Nico can feel the pout that droops across your face. "I wanted to sit with Johnny."

"Decisions, decisions." He hums, "I wouldn't have fallen asleep on you like he did."

Your hands reach forward, locking around the arm he's got outstretched towards the steering wheel. "You can't, you're our driver."

"Ouch, from boyfriend to driver all because he got here?"

Giggling, you tug on his arm until it falls to rest on the center consol. Instinctively he offers you his hand, and you thread your fingers through his. "My boyfriend, our driver."

His stomach swoops pleasantly, butterflies fluttering around the empty crevices of his gut and ribs. Boyfriend, he'll never get tired of hearing that. A flattered smile dimples his cheeks, unable to form words he just hums.

"Can I come sit up there?"

"Not while the car is driving."

You make a noise of complaint. "Can we stop for food?"

"When I see somewhere to eat, yeah."

You point out the front windshield at the next exit. "McDonald's."

Nico makes a face. "Not good for you."

"If you feed Johnny bad food it'll make even more tired and lazy."

Damn you and your sneaky ways. Nico puts on his blinker, moving lanes to exit the highway. "And shorten his lifespan, hopefully." He says under his breath, flinching when you bite into his arm in retaliation. "Ow, what was that for?"

"Because I love you."

Nico shakes his head, taking the exit ramp and suddenly you're slipping away into the backseat. He hears you shuffling, comes to a stop at the light and almost instantly you're squirming over the console.

"Oh my god we're five seconds away from the restaurant!" He complains, outraged that you still wormed your way up here after he said no.

"The car isn't driving." You smile, blowing your hair out of your face and settling into the seat. Nico shoots you an unimpressed look and you buckle up as he pulls into the almost empty parking lot. "What am I supposed to get him?"

"I don't know. I guess we wake him up."

Nico stretches his arm across your body, holding you steady as he slams on the brakes. The rolling car halts, tiring screeching and you flop into his arm. Johnny however crashes into the back of Nico's seat, yelping as he scrambles to get his bearings.

"Nico!" You gasp, and he cackles. The car rolls forward into the drive-thru lane and you unbuckle to turn to Johnny. "Are you ok?"

A curly head of hair pops into the front seat, Johnny's narrowed gaze locking on Nico. "Fine," he spits, and you comfortingly run your fingers through his hair. Nico ignores the way it makes his own scalp ache, wanting to feel you play with his hair too.

"What do you want to eat?" He asks, casually. Which was the wrong move because now he's debating with you about a burger or spicy chicken sandwich, but also nuggets sound good, and did you see the happy meal toy?

"Oh my god pick something!" Nico exclaims, and you both fall silent. A heavy tension sits in the air and he's tempted to roll down his window to air it out but doesn't want to risk the workers hearing him yell at you two like children.

So he just glares at Johnny, who is looking from you to Nico, and you're watching both of them with wide innocent eyes. Always so sweet looking, like you did nothing wrong. Like you didn't trick Nico into this whole stupid road trip when Johnny is capable of driving himself.

Still eyeing him, Johnny mutters out of the side of his mouth to you. "The driver is grumpy."

Nico swears he can feel his eye twitch, feel a stroke building in his brain and he's two seconds away from just driving off. "He's a much better boyfriend," you whisper, as if he can't hear you. Nico's unamused gaze moves to you, and you blink at him with big doe eyes.

"I want a double cheeseburger please, with a tea."

Nico sighs. "Ok, and you?"

Johnny forces a polite smile. "Number 3 with a coke please."

Huffing, Nico shifts to roll down his window just as he gets to the speaker and menu. "And a better driver, sheesh."

"Oh for fucks sake!"

"Cara, don't let him throw me out of the car!" Johnny pleads, hiding in the back seat again. You shrug him off, leaning into Nico's shoulder again and laying a hand on his thigh.

"Please let me keep him?" You pout, and Nico obviously can't say no so he just goes back to ordering.

Maybe on the highway he can throw him out of the car, Nico thinks but deep down he knows he can't. That's your Johnny in the backseat and as long as you want him around, Nico will make sure he's there.

Even if it makes him want to rip his hair out.

[fangirlstorycreator]

Alastor X Reader

Context: When you discover it's Alastor's birthday, you want to suprise him with a thoughtful gift. But would it be one he'd like? And how would he show his appreciation?

Part 2/2

You had to be very careful bringing Alastor's gift back home, especially considering you were planning on giving him a pet. Getting her home was easy, and thankfully, due to noone being in the hotel lobby, you were able to slip upstairs to your room without anyone noticing. The lady at the ranch had given you a whole box of things to look after her before she was gifted to Alastor, food, toys? A harness, all sorts of things, including a bed to sleep on inside her carrying case. Hiding her in your room, you made sure she was happy, watered and fed before you left the room, and luckily, she was fast asleep when you left her. This was the time you took to help Charlie with her planning and setting up. But, when you did spot Charlie running down the hall, she was actually more suprised to see you than you were her.

"Oh! Y/N! Perfect! I really need your help!"

"Ok, what can I do?"

"Alastor is still in the hotel, but I know he'll come in and see what we're up to if he hears us! Please! Please can you take him out until we're finished? We want everything to be perfect!"

"Ok, sure, I can do that. When do you want us to come back?"

"I'll text you when we're ready, how does that sound?"

"Yeh, I'm fine with that. Alright, I'll go ask him"

"Thank you thank you thank you!!!"

And off she bounded, straight back down the hall. For the princess of hell, she was surprisingly adorable. Chuckling to yourself, you walked up to Alastor's door and knocked.

"Ah! Good day to you my dear. What a pleasant surpise"

"It's nice to see you too Alastor. I was just wondering if you wanted to go for a walk with me?"

"My, I would love to. Let me just grab my staff. Say, before we go, might I borrow you for a moment?"

"Yeh, sure. (Closing his door as you enter his room) What do you need?"

He approaches you, desire in his eyes, taking in all of your features.

"Why.....I need you......my darling......I dare say, we were so rudely interrupted yesterday, and I would very much like to return to what I was planning on doing"

"Oh really...I can't possibly imagine what you mean by that....why don't you show me?...."

"With pleasure....."

Taking you by the waist, he has you against him, hands resting on his strong chest, feeling the warmth of his body radiating into your palms. Keeping searing eye contact with you, he's slow as he leans in, tilting his head to the side, and locking his soft lips with yours. Oh wow he was good. He captured your tounge and lips in a carnal hunger, craving the touch and taste of your lips, deepening each moment, growing more and more passionate. His hand slid up your neck and into your hair, keeping you as close to him as possible. It made you feel almost dizzy, he had literally taken your breath away. When the kiss slowed down, and he pulled away just a little, both you and him were a slignty breathless. But his smile never left, and his eyes still burned for you.

".....Oh......wow Alastor.....I never knew you could kiss like that"

"That is something for only you to know my dear.....I have dreamed of your taste for many days and nights.....and yet they were sweeter than I could have possibly fathomed"

"How long have you been imagining me?"

"Too long my dear.....too long. Now then! Shall we away? I know of a very pleasant route that can take us past Cannibal Town. Would you like that"

"That sounds nice, lead the way. Oh, and Alastor?"

"Hm?"

"Next time you kiss me like that, make it a little longer..."

"Oh ho, don't you worry my dear......I plan too...."

Neither of you saw Charlie jumping for joy when she saw you and Alastor leave, now she could set up for the party properly, without the possibility of him walking in on the suprise. You and Alastor meanwhile, had been walking for about an hour now, but neither of you noticed how quick the time had gone. You were just enjoying eachothers company, hearing eachothers stories, walking to the main square of Cannibal Town.

"I say, I see Rosie over there, shall we say hello?"

"I'd love too"

During the walk, your arm was looped in with his, and that didn't change, even as you both approached Rosie on tne sidewalk.

"Good day Rosie!"

"Alastor! Hello sweetie, back to see me so soon?"

"But of course, it's always a pleasure to see you. And I have with me Y/N"

"Hi Y/N! Gosh I haven't seen you in such a long time. How are you honey?"

"I'm good thank you. It's nice to see you again"

"Same to you too honey. Say? Isn't it someone's special day today? C'mon Alastor!"

"Ah yes....I am aware it is my birthday Rosie"

"Ain't you doing anything to celebrate?"

"I dare say, the only two people in the hotel who know of this, are dear Y/N hear, and an unfortunate dim wit who also resides in the hotel"

"But ain't you gunna do anything for it?"

"If I am being truthful Rosie, just walking through the city and conversing with Y/N, has actually been one of the most enjoyable ways I have spend my birthday, dead or alive"

Awww, that's so sweet of him to say. He's such a gentleman.

"Well aren't you a darling Alastor! (Looks between you and him) It seems you may may have found a lovely lady to finaly spend some quality time with. And I always thought you were an ace in the hole"

"A what now?"

"Never mind sweetie. I've got to go see some people who need my help in Cannibal Town, I'll see you two lovelies later!"

She happily walked down the street. You couldn't help but smile up at Alastor.

"My my, what's made me lucky enough to witness such a beautiful smile?"

"The way you just spoke about me just then. It was wonderful"

"Aha, I always make sure you know how appreciated you are my darling. Now, shall we make our way back to the hotel? It's starting to get dark"

"Wait, not yet"

Realizing Charlie hasn't texted you yet, you luckily thought of a plan B for this on the way, remembering to sneek just a little something into your pocket before heading out with Alastor.

"Why ever not my dear?"

"You've not said anything about your birthday today Alastor, but I want you to know that I haven't forgotten to get you anything"

"I know my dear, but I do not expect anyone to say or give me anything, simply because I was born on this day"

"You say that, but I just wanted to give you a little something"

"Oh ho my dear, I do believe your kiss was more than enough as a gift for me today"

"That's so sweet Alastor. But, I'm still going to give you this anyway"

"I say, what is it?"

You held in your hand, giving it to him, a small box.

"It's not much, but I used to make things out of resin, make them 3D and paint them to look like everyday things. This is just something I made that reminded me of you"

Opening the box, his eyes grew at the sight of the little home made keying. Lifting it out of the box with his finger, it was a 3D version of a bowl of Jambalaya, in a circular clear resin. It looked like Jambalaya inside a clear marble.

"Oh my dear.....it's wonderful"

"I'm glad you like it"

"I love it. Thank you!"

He couldn't contain his happiness, and pulled you in for a quick hug.

"I shall place this on my staff. I dare day it gives it a touch of class, don't you think?"

"I do, it goes together nicely. Oh, I'm getting a text"

Yes, Charlie was finished, and at just the right time too.

"You wanna head back then Alastor?"

"With pleasure my dear"

It was dusk by the time you both arrived back at the hotel, arms still linked, and his smile larger than ever. It was dark inside from your view of the window, but you did glance Nifty's head, quickly being pulled down by Angel.

"May I confess something to you before we enter my dear?"

"Of course you can"

"I didn't always enjoy my birthday when I was a child. I had not experienced a party or a true celebration, but I always did have a wonderful time thanks to my mother. I'd just like to say thank you, for helping me remember that this day can contain happiness"

"Your welcome Alastor"

Reaching your hand up, you hold his cheek, stroking it with your thumb. His eyes fluttered shut, and his ears twisted together, he even leaned into your touch. Opening the door for you like a true gentleman, your the first to walk into the dark lobby, followed by him.

"SUPRISE!!! HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!!"

The voices of Charlie, Angel and Nifty all scream when you come in, turning the lights on to reveal the lobby, decorated just like a club from the 1920's, including everyone dressed in their 1920's outfits.

"Oh my word!! I was truly not expecting this! My dear Y/N, did you know that Charlie and the others had prepared this suprise?"

"I might have done"

"Oh you are a sly one...I love it. Thank you very much everyone, this is a wonderful suprise. It truly feels like I'm back in New Orleans. I say? Are those deviled eggs? And dutchess potatoes and-huh! Is that a roasted duck with a candle on the top to have instead of a cake?!"

Alastor can't help but be drawn to the table laden with foods of his memories, smiling and chuckling as he scans them all. Charlie slipped over to you, nudging you on the shoulder.

"He loves it! Thank you for the suggestion Y/N, it's perfect"

"No worries Charlie. You and the others did a great job at decorating. Aaand I can already see Angel admiring himself in the mirror"

"Oh yeh, he loves costume. Alright! Let's get this party started!"

That evening actually went really well, Alastor carved the duck, everyone ate the food, Angel and Husk got tipsy at the bar, and Nifty liked cleaning up behind anyone who was messy. Alastor still had big shiny eyes at the decor and nibbles, it truly did remind him of home. And thankfully, Lucifer was there but stayed a good distance away from Alastor, and also you. Your not suprised though, you did shout at him. You were actually quite shocked he didn't hit you with one of his wings, or try to kill you. As a sinner who spoke to the king of hell like that, you half expected to be at least suffering with a few bruises. You were stood laughing with Alastor, when Angel and Husk stumbled over, drinks in hand.

"Happy birthday smiles! How'd yah like my outfit? Pretty sexy huh?"

"You seem rather intoxicated there Angel. But yes, your attire does suit you splendidly"

"Thanks! Hey uh, I've got your present hear smiles! Hear yah go! I hope you like it!"

He hands Alastor a box with a ribbon, and upon opening it, Alastor chuckles and shakes his head.

"Angel Angel Angel..."

"What? Don't yah like it?"

Angel asks as Alastor pulls it out to have a better look, at a custom made cooking apron with his name on, and a picture of the map of New Orleans.

"It's marvellous my good man. I shall very much take pleasure in using this the next time I prepare my signature dish"

"Nice!"

"And what about you Husk? Did you get me anything"

"You own my soul. I ain't gotta get you shit"

"Aha! As humorous as ever my good man!"

"C'mon Angel. I need another drink"

You weren't suprised Husk didn't get him anything, He hates him. Next, Charlie and Vaggie came up to you and Alastor.

"Hi! I've got you a birthday present too Alastor!"

"That is very kind of you Charlie"

She excitedly hands him a small box, Vaggie on the other hand just looks away with a grumpy face. Just like Husk, Vaggie doesn't like him either.

"My my! How delightful! This is just what I was attempting to acquire on my last visit to town! Thank you Charlie"

"Your welcome Alastor! I know you said you needed a monocle cleaning kit, and I managed to find one!"

"I shall use it regularly. You have my thanks"

As Alastor chats with Charlie and Vaggie, a small hand takes yours and pulls you towards the end of the food table.

"Lucifer?"

"Hey. How are you?"

"Fine thanks. What's up?"

"Listen, I uh...I just wanna say sorry about the last time we spoke"

"Don't be, it's fine. Water under the bridge"

"Really? Are you sure?"

"Yeh, no worries Lucifer. Today's about celebrating. No need to think or worry about squabbles or arguments that happened"

"Oh! Thank you! I swear, I thought you'd tear me a new one if I came up to you today"

"Really? I'm suprised you didn't do the same. Your Lucifer Morningstar, and I'm just a sinner"

"Oh no no no! I wouldn't do that. Besides, I wouldn't do that to a friend"

"Thanks Lucifer. Your my friend too. So? Do you have anything to give Alastor?"

"(Grumbles) Not a gift....but I suppose......I can be......nice? To him?"

"It's the thought that counts Lucifer, trying to be nice is better than round 2. Come on then"

Begrudgingly, Lucifer does come back with you, just as Charlie and Vaggie walk away.

"My dear....oho! Why, if it isn't the tiny king? I dare say, I didn't see you there at first..all the way down there!"

"Oh yeh?! Well-"

He stops himself, taking a breath and putting on a smile.

"Yeh, I'm am short aren't I? But you know what they say, big things come in small packages, Ha! I uh....ehem....I wish you....a happy birthday......"

"My oh my? What a suprisingly thoughtful thing to say. One might think you were incapable of speaking to me without venom spitting from your lips"

"No no, I uh......can be nice.....so, anyway, happy birthday or whatever. I've gotta go!"

He sped over to Charlie so quick, you could tell he was gritting his teeth and trying his hardest not to tear Alastor a new one. But your proud that he tried.

"Isn't that nice? Charlie, Vaggie and Angel getting you birthday presents, and Lucifer wishing you a happy birthday too"

"I am rather stunned I must say. I half expected it from Charlie, but I was pleasantly surprised by Angel. One might think it was a tacky gift, but it has character. And as for little Lucifer? I believe that was far more entertaining than watching Vox loose his internet connection! Aha!"

"But are you enjoying your party?"

"Oh yes, absolutely. I'm not one for a crowd, but this is rather pleasant. And the food hear is very tasteful. Would you care for an oyster rockefeller?"

"No thank you, I'm ok. But Alastor?"

"Yes?"

"I was just wondering, if maybe we could go to your room for a moment?"

"Of course my darlin-Oh! Ooh...do you wish to 'share' some quality time? Because if that is the case, I am more than happy to oblige"

"Well, you may want to after"

"After? Hm? Now I am even more intrigued. Please, lead the way my dear"

You and him slip away up the stairs, and down the hallway to his room.

"I'll see you in there Alastor. I've just got to grab something"

"Of course, I shall await you"

Quickly, you run to your room, and see your gift for him has woken up, and is in a happy, playful mood.

"Alright little lady, time to meet your new daddy"

Keeping her in the carrier, you place a blanket over and carry her through the hallways, into Alastor's room.

"So my dear, do you care to explain the sneaking around your......I say?......what is that you are placing on the floor? And why has it got a blanket over it?"

"Well, the thing is Alastor, that little keyring I gave you wasn't your main present"

"Oh really? But I did enjoy it so! It's wonderful and I truly treasure it, because you were the wonderful lady who made it for me"

"I know Alastor, and that so sweet to hear. But........if you take a peak in hear, you'll see your main present....."

"Ooooh! How thrilling! (Gets on his knees and pulls away the blanket) It seems there is something moving in hear, let me just open this little door, and-"

He gasps. Unable to take his eyes off the little moving creature inside the carrier. His hands cover his mouth, a small tear running down his cheek, he looks so happy.

"Oh....oh my darling......this is the best gift I have ever received...."

He reaches into the carrier, carefully pulling out the little animal, cradling her in his arms.

"Are you happy?"

"I've never been happier my dear. I can't believe you've got me a baby alligator!"

"You like her then?"

"It's a girl?!"

"Yep. I know you prefer girls to boys in any animal or person, it made sence to get you a female"

"Oh.....she's perfect! I don't know how I can ever repay you"

"No need, she's a birthday present. And I hope you have fun taking care of her. Oh! She hasn't got a name yet, you can name her if you like"

"How wonderful! Let's see.....I think she looks like an.........Abigail! Yes! It's suits her, Abigail it is"

He happily tickles her smooth belly, her little tail wiggles as he does, almost as if she could laugh. His smile has never been bigger, and his eyes are filled with love. Sometimes, when times are tough, having a pet that loves you unconditionally is exactly what you need. He looks like a proud dad, placing Abigail on the floor, and letting her sniff and walk around his room and swamp area, this place was perfect for her, it won't take her long to settle in at all.

"Awwww, she's already playing in the water. She was cute when I picked her up, but now she's even cuter. Don't you think Alas-"

Very unexpectedly, Alastor grabs you by the waist, spins you around, bends you down as he holds you, pressing his lips you yours as your eyes flutter shut. He kisses you and holds you so romantically, it makes you feel lighter than air. Slowly, he let's you stand back up, still holding you in his arms.

"I never expected I gained such a romantic gentleman. I've never been kissed like that before"

"Trust me when I say, this will be a recurring and very pleasurable moment we shall share together. I can promise you that. Infact, would you like to share my bed this evening?"

"Really? Sharing your bed?"

"I simply wish to hold you and kiss you to the point you feel flush and faint in my embrace. I'd like to....quite literally take your breath away....."

"Any woman would be mad not to want that, ok. But aren't you going to be busy with Abigail? She is a baby after all"

"Worry not my darling, I am very good at caring for animals like her, she shall be happy and comfortable by the time me and you are both curled up in my bed"

"Has anyone ever told you, your a really sweet man?"

"Only you my dear, only you. (Sweet kiss to your lips). Now! I do believe I should introduce little Abigail hear, to the rest of the hotel! She will be living here after all!"

"What do you think the reactions of the others will be?"

"There's only one way to find out....."

Picking up Abigail, he ran to the staircase so fast, your hair blew in the wind. You just laugh, seeing how excitable he was at having a pet, it made you feel amazing. You smile walking to the staircase, and leaning against the banister at the top, watching and chuckling at Alastor below. He's holding Abigail up in his arms so proudly, showing her to everyone. Charlie, Lucifer and Angel actually think she's cute, stroking her head and belly. Husk hides behind the bar, swearing and shouting at the sight of an alligator in the hotel, Pentious and Vaggie keep their distance, looking a little sheepish, and Nifty sits on Alastor's shoulder, cooing at Abigail. This was definitely going to be an interesting new time in the hotel, an alligator? Alastor with an alligator? Let's see what will happen.

Link to part 1

[fumifooms]

I have a question about Falin vs. Hien, like if Falin had actually accepted Shuro 's proposal and moved to the Eastern lands, what would the relationship between Falin and Hien be like, does Hien only like the idea of Shuro, similar to how Shuro loves the idea of Falin instead of Falin herself?

Hien’s very professional & capable and her job’s everything to her, so I think she’d treat Falin like she treats her other bosses, with respect and fulfilling their demands as efficiently and cleanly as she can. After all, Falin would then be becoming the head of the household’s wife, the lady of the house. And as we saw with Hien becoming very detached and professional with Toshiro, she doesn’t have a hard time putting feelings and interpersonal issues or dynamics aside when it’s best. There’s also something to say about how there’s no personal-life work-life separation for her, she lives with her employers under their watch and her job is a status, not a contract. And unlike the others, Hien was born and raised there, not just bought and brought young, that’s all she knows. The other retainers, the ninja girls, are under her watch, they’re roommates, they’re peers but they’re also not— by being their manager and leader there’s another line drawn in the sand between her and the others. There are no relationships outside of work because there is no life outside of work. Toshiro was her childhood friend but he’s also always been her boss’ son, so she pushed him to be more worthy of his title like how she was, don’t cry etc etc, she’s always treated him a bit with that "remember our positions" attitude, so it’s no wonder that growing up their relationship just sort of naturally and wordlessly shifted into just that. Capability and good behavior is required from her, it’s her default and the way she was brought up.

Now, as for her feelings about it… Well, when she talks about it during canon she does seem to be bothered for one reason or another, or just struggling to conceive the idea- not unlike how she struggled with the realization that her and Toshiro weren’t happening.

One notable thing is that the relationship she’s imagining isn’t really- desirable? Explicitly it’s because of Toshiro’s father and Maizuru’s affair that Hien thought that she’d become Toshiro’s mistress, as his closest servant, and they don’t exactly paint a happy or honorable picture. It’s not desirable, it’s expected. That’s how Hien expresses it too, that’s what she expected, not necessarily wanted. But now that the expected didn’t happen she wonders if that’s because something’s wrong with her- if it’s because she didn’t fulfill her role properly. And that bothers her, the way it’d get to someone for who being good at what you’re assigned at is your whole life and purpose, the way that’s what you base your self-worth on. It’s unsettling, the way a clock that was supposed to hit the hour on time but didn’t is, the way an unspoken law of the universe being suddenly broken without consequence is. Honestly I do relate a bit to the specific situation of Hien, because I had a guy childhood friend growing up and I thought just by that token something might happen. Nothing happened and I was never in love, but it still felt like a very real possibility at one point just because, because of what people say and what shows show— either way, I think it’s fitting to say that Toshiro was an idea to Hien, the idea of family heir, boss and also childhood friend potential lover, without necessarily attaching feelings to any of those ideas inherently, mostly a sense of duty and that those "ideas", those roles assigned to people are very important.

So yes I think it’s mainly a self-worth issue if anything, and I think it’s something she’s mostly moved past, especially with being able to talk about it and reaffirm her confidence despite it and being praised by Beni, etc etc. Although like I mentioned in my Hien analysis, I don’t really think she’s self-aware in general. I think it just healed itself vaguely the way things you don’t think about slowly get digested and processed over time. So yes I don’t think Hien ever really loved the idea of Toshiro, in fact she sometimes calls him unfit for leadership and criticizes him, but I think it became a confidence and like, ‘my 5 years life plan just changed drastically because this didn’t happen’ thing. But yes maybe Falin popping up and being so unfit to be a Nakamoto heiress would clash with Hien’s need for rules, the very freedom Shuro likes about her being the thing that makes her a black sheep there— the type that the Nakamoto house stifles, where freedom and whimsy goes to die and be ripped out of you etiquette lesson after etiquette lesson- "Obey the rules and your curfew or a ghost demon will chase you with a knife" after "You still have so little feats to your name, are you really the great warrior Toshitsugu’s son?" I would love to see Hien’s suppressed resentment or sense of entitlement bubble up in ways not even herself fully understands, and like most things like that, she vents and hashes it out with Benichidori :3c Idk I wanted to give more alternate ideas and brainstorm but this is pretty much it to me I think. I could definitely see Hien being passive agressive and very critical with Falin, microanalyzing and voicing every little thing to "fix", if allowed.

Tbh I have beef with that interpretation of Falin-Shuro. Half because not even Laios and Marcille listen to Falin well, and because people underplay how much time they’ve spent together and the genuine significance of her to him. Toshiro only fell for her after a good while of working beside her, when she did something that reached to his feelings, and as shown by the little Laios-Shuro compilation in their fight chapter he did spend time with her, tried to take her on dates. Let’s not forget she had to save Toshiro from his nightmare the same way Laios did with Marcille, that’s already a lot of material to feel a connection with someone, showing that much vulnerability.

I’m not saying he knows her superrr well, but he did show genuine and consistent want and drive to get to know her better, did show genuine interest in her and who she is. Hell, "the way she thinks" is one of the reasons he lists for why he loves her! When she turns his proposal down, he accepts it with a smile saying "you can’t tie down a dragon", after all- that freedom is what he likes about her. He admires it and is happy for her leaving to travel around and finding herself, and really what a beautiful selfless caring love. The selfless love in letting go.

It’s not that the idea that Shuro loves his idea of Falin has no merit, Falin is pretty much pushed into an ideal by everyone close to her, but in their case it’s something I hear all the time and often pushed to extremes based on vibes. And honestly there’s an argument to be made for the reverse as well, where he’s the one who perhaps sees her the most, who doesn’t treat her as a little kid or a little sister to protect and talk over because you know what’s good for them better than they do, fighting over who gets to decide her future. Toshiro gives Falin a choice with his proposal, she turns it down, and that’s okay. That’s a whole other thing to get into but what matters here for this is that in early canon he was the only one present who loved her who was also willing to let her go for her sake, the man who rushed into the dungeon neglecting his health with inadequately prepared equipment, with his team he BEGGED TO HELP HIM, ASKING SOMETHING FOR HIMSELF FOR THE FIRST TIME IN HIS LIFE—

Who now instead of clinging to her and his attachment to her, who instead of scolding her and shutting her down for her decision to sacrifice herself, accepts it and wants her body and soul to rest, to be at peace instead of transformed and controlled against her will by magic— He is able to show the love in letting go, the care and strength in it. And that’s something Laios did have to learn, with its climax in how he killed Falin after the rabbit curry. Something Marcille had to learn, being ready to accept her death in the final chapter.

If you look at it any closer than "wow he fell in love like at once instead of slowly?" everything is stacked in the favor of his love being true and caring tbh. Even if she’s idealized, doesn’t make his love any less genuine that Marcille’s and Laios’ who do too. No shade intended and I don’t meant to read in any more in your words than what you intended, I just hope this illustrates well the differences between Hien->Toshiro and Toshiro->Falin imo! Either way it IS a very interesting parallel to draw. -Eyes suddenly shot open as I lay in the dark in my bed, haunted- The love in letting go, wait, like Hien letting go of her notions of what her and Toshiro should be… The self-love in that too, too, especially in her case. There’s something here…

[ravennaortiz]

May I?

Summary: Juice struggles to ask Happy for his daughter OC Coris hand in marriage. As always 18+!

You can do this. Thought Juice to himself as he took a deep breath. Eyes locked on Happy who was talking with Tig and Chibs across the lot. He had been trying to get the courage to speak to him all week. To ask a simple question. Yet every time he chickened out. A small voice in his head kept talking him out of it. What if he said no? That was worst case scenario. But he might say yes, which would make this one of the best days of his life. His feet were moving before he realized it. All three men stopped talking once he joined them.

“Hap. Can we. Umm can we talk” asked Juice his eyes looking anywhere but at his friend. Hand rubbing nervously at the back of his neck. Happy simply grunted and jerked his head off to the picnic tables across the lot.

“Well?” inquired Happy after several very silent minutes as he sat perched on one of the tables. Eyes watching Juice pace back and forth in front of him. Clearly something was on the young mans mind.

“I….i was…..I was wondering if you would mind” started Juice as he shook his head before turning away from Happy. Trying desperately to collect his thoughts. This should not be this difficult he thought to himself.

“I was wanting to know if you would care….no would you mind….well ughh” started Juice again as he balled his fists in frustration.

“This about my daughter?” inquired Happy finally. Taking pity on Juice. He had an inkling what he was trying to get at but did not want to assume.

“It’s about Cori” blurted out Juice eagerly as he nodded. Mentally kicking himself because obviously Happy would know his daughters name.

“So it’s about my daughter. Glad we are on the same page” replied Happy dryly as he chewed on his toothpick as he shook his head. “What about her?”

“May I?” asked Juice quickly.

“May you what?” asked Happy his face stern and a frown on his lips. He knew damn well what was being asked but he wasn’t going to make this easy. Partly because he want ready to have this talk. Cori was his little girl, his only family. His heart pounded at the idea of her being someone else’s.

Fuck Juice thought to himself as he closed his eyes. He was making a mess of this. Taking a deep breath he opened his eyes and locked onto Happys. “May I have the honor of marrying your daughter? She means the world to me just like she does to you. I can’t imagine life without her Hap. Words cannot express the depth of my love for her. So if you would allow it. I’d love to ask her to get my crow and marry me.”

Happy was silent. His eyes burning a hole in Juice. He swallowed hard before pushing off the table. Chucking when Juice back pedaled. “Wasn’t gonna hit you” he grunted as he opened his arms. “Come give your father in law a hug” he added making Juice roll his eyes and laugh. “Seriously though. I couldn’t ask for a better man for my baby girl.” He added before pulling Juice in for a quick hug anyway.

[changingplumbob]

CW: Language - Guide to content warnings

Glenn headed to the bathroom and Silver felt his heart sink further. If Ophelia had sorted out the delivery of a pregnancy test... that was as good as saying it was real and happening, wasn't it? Or maybe not. She had said to remember to breathe. Maybe it's just a scare and Glenn was nauseous because Silver was pregnant? Sympathetic pregnancy? That would be much better.

Glenn: Do you want to come in while I-

Silver: No.

Glenn: Okay then. Guess I can figure it out

Glenn went in to the bathroom and opened the box. It didn't look too complicated and the instructions seemed straight forward. How hard could it be? He peed on the stick and sat down to wait. Silver hadn't come in so there was little point going to wait in his room, he clearly didn't want to be here for it.

But why? He and Silver had talked a lot about adopting kids. Silver had made it clear he wanted kids, and Glenn had had to cheer up the werewolf a few times when he was sad they couldn't have biological kids together. Glenn heard the werewolf move from the bed to outside the bathroom.

Silver: Does it say...

Glenn: Not yet. I... I feel like you're not happy. Am I wrong?

He could hear Silver sighing and pacing on the other side of the door.

Silver: No. I just... you shouldn't have to go through pregnancy. It does... it does a lot to your body. I should be going through it instead. Werewolves are stronger and I can't die and you... you could die

Glenn: Beefcake I am not going to die. I... I am going to have a baby though

Silver: Shit! You- you can't be-

Glenn heard the panic in Silver's voice and took the test in to the bedroom to show him.

Glenn: Positive. Someway, somehow, I'm pregnant

Silver: *sadly* No. Shit. I can't believe I ruined you

Glenn: You haven't ruined anything. We wanted kids right? I guess we can have biological ones after all

Silver: But you'll get round and lose your abs and your humor and Babycakes it'll all be my fault and if you die-

Glenn: No, hey, hey. It's going to be alright

Silver: You don't know that. We've never heard of a male spellcaster being pregnant. What if the kid kills you to survive to term

Glenn: It won't. But look we'll go talk to Phoebus, he's ancient like you. He's bound to have heard of something like this happening. Forget the stuff I might go through and just focus on the fact that we're having a baby together. How do you feel about them?

Silver: Well I... I want your kids, however they come. I just didn't think-

Glenn: Baby only Beefcake, baby

Silver: I... I guess... if they do exist already, I'll do whatever it takes to keep them. Short of you being hurt

Glenn: So ignoring everything else, you're happy to have made a kid with me?

Silver: Shit, of course I am. I just- there are so many unknowns and I love you and I don't want you hurt but yes, I'm going to love our kid. I promise. It just might take me some time

Glenn gathered Silver up for a hug. He understood Silver's fears, he had them as well. But he wanted to grow a family with this man.

Glenn: I know you're sad it's not you pregnant

Silver: I mean... I never liked the idea of being pregnant but I like the idea of you being pregnant even less. Like imagine you've got a little wolf in there? They could break your ribs

Glenn: Then I'm lucky I've got a big strong man to protect me right?

Silver: You are a strong man to

Glenn: Then you know I can do this. I'm going to have our kid Silver and it'll be fine. They'll be healthy, I'll be alive, you'll be a far better dad than yours was

Silver: *sighs* I hope you're right

Glenn: Of course Beefcake, I'm always right

Previous ... Next

[pholla-jm]

The Number You Have Reached

IMAGINE: THE NUMBER YOU HAVE REACHED~ NANAMI X READER FEAT: YUUJI GENRE: ANGST warnings: major character death. not proof read. major angst... like I cried a little bit while writing. no happy ending ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The black slick heel clicks against the tile floor of your home. You stared at the clock in the kitchen. The neon numbers staring at you, mocking you of the time. 

He promised you that he would be home in time for your date. There was no reason for him to be late. He was never late. Which caused you to worry. 

With a sigh, you pull out your phone. With a single tap on the screen, it lights up showing up the home screen. A picture of you and Nanami. It was a simple picture, but it was easily one of the best days in your life. 

The sweet and savory smell of breakfast wakes you up. The thick duvet is immediately pushed aside when you recognize the smell of your favorite. It didn’t even click in your head that Nanami wasn’t in bed. 

You walk into the kitchen, immediately blessed with a beautiful view. The table was set up, two plates and a small bouquet of your favorite flowers as the centerpiece. 

Nanami stood in front of the stove only wearing dark sweatpants and a white t-shirt. His blonde hair was a bit disheveled and pushed back. 

You swear, you could take a bite of his biceps and be content. He just looked so delicious at this moment. 

Nanami hears your steps and he turns around to give you a smile. There was a certain light in his eyes, like he was excited about something. “What’s all this?” You ask, really hoping he wasn’t going to say anniversary. You would feel terrible if you got the date wrong. 

“Nothing special, just felt like making you breakfast.” He says and you hum with a smile. You look past him, seeing the plate of your favorite foods. 

“Yeah? And it just so happened to be crepes and fresh fruit? My favorite. I think you’re buttering me up for something.” 

Nanami shakes his head, grabbing the plate and bringing it over the table. “Would that be horrible?” “I guess not,” you walk over to the refrigerator, “juice?” 

Nanami stops you before you can open the fridge. His hands firm on your shoulders and he drags you to the chair at the kitchen table. “I got it. Don’t you worry about a thing.” 

You just smile at him, wondering what was really going on. 

He grabs the drink for both of you and finally settles down to eat with you. 

“Thank you for breakfast, it’s delicious.” You say after taking the first bite. Nanami hums in acknowledgement, and you can see that he is fidgeting with something. 

You look down at his hands- well one of his hands- stuck in his pocket. You could tell that there was something in there. 

Deciding not to beat around the bush, you ask him, “what’s in your pocket?”Nanami’s eyes shoot up at you and he chuckles, “always straight to the point… that’s one of the many reasons why I love you.” 

You could feel your cheeks flush at his comments, “what’s going on?” 

Nanami let out a deep exhale before standing up and walking over to your side. 

He suddenly gets down on one knee and your eyes widen. 

No… he couldn’t be doing what you think he is… 

“(y/n), from the moment we met, my world has been brighter. Every laugh we've shared, every quiet moment we've spent together, and every challenge we've faced side by side have only made me more sure of one thing: you are the person I want to walk through life with.” 

You could feel tears well up in your eyes as he spoke. 

“I don’t know what the future holds, but I do know this: I want to face it with you. I want to build a life together, filled with memories, laughter, and love. I want to be your partner in everything.

So I ask, will you marry me?” 

You don’t hesitate to give him an answer as he pulls out the small box. Opening it to reveal the elegant diamond ring. 

“Yes!” You push yourself forward into his arms, nearly knocking him over. But his arms wrapped around you, stabilizing the both of you. 

Nanami laughs in relief. He couldn’t believe that he was finally going to get married to you.

He pulls back, just enough to slip the ring onto your left ring finger. 

You stare in awe, the ring was beautiful and it fit just right. 

“Wait,” you say, grabbing the phone off the table, “I want to capture this moment.” 

The photo of you and Nanami stared back at you. Both happy and smiling faces. Your left hand rested on his cheek, showing off the engagement ring. 

With another sigh, you swipe up to unlock the phone. You click on Nanami’s profile, his phone ringing a few times before it goes straight to voicemail. 

“You’ve reached Nanami, I am unavailable at the moment so please leave a message after the beep.” 

You smile hearing his voice, so simple and to the point. 

The phone beeped, signaling to leave the message. 

“Hey, Kento, baby. It’s me. Well you know that. It’s-” you look at the neon numbers shining in the kitchen “it’s almost nine now. You’re never late. Just let me know if you're safe. Love you.” You click the red button, ending the message. 

Your head tilts back, looking at the ceiling. “Ken… where are you?” You whisper to yourself. 

Another thirty minutes go by and you decide to call him two more times. Again, straight to voicemail.

It was midnight now, and it now dawns on you that he was not coming home for date night. 

You head back to your shared room, and get ready for bed. He had to have a good reason as to not answering any of your calls or texts. Well he better… or he would have hell. 

Harsh knocking pulls you from your slumber. The urgency causing you to fall out of bed, the duvets and blankets getting tangled up. 

“Oh my god… who is this loud at this hour?” You ask yourself as you compose yourself to answer the door. 

You were hoping it was Nanami, since you noticed that he still wasn’t in bed. 

However, it wasn’t him when you opened the door. 

“Yuuji?” You ask, confused to see him at your door. You could tell that he was going through it. He was littered in cuts, and underneath his eyes were red. “Come in.” You don’t wait for him to answer. 

You know Nanami’s relationship with the young boy. 

Yuuji looks at you with pity, like something was weighing him down. He doesn't say anything though. He comes inside and you motion to the couch for him to sit. 

He sits down on the plush couch. “I’ll get you something to drink and a first aid kit.” 

“No. I’m okay.” 

It was the first words to tumble out of his mouth. You could tell that his voice was heavy with pain. You give him a look and sit next to him. 

“Okay… why are you here then?” 

Yuuji tense up, his fist balling up in his lap. Just thinking about him brought him in great distress. 

Tears started to well up in his eyes again and the silence was starting to thicken the tension in the room.

You could feel something was wrong. 

“Yuuji…” his name comes out in a softless whisper and it causes him to flinch, “where’s Nanami?” 

Yuuji chokes out a sob just from hearing his name. And that was all you needed to hear. 

You didn’t want to believe it. It couldn’t be right. 

You couldn’t even bare yourself to comfort the young boy on your couch. You lifted yourself up from the couch and went to your room.

Yuuji flinches, his eyes squeezing shut at the sounds of your sobbing and wailing. Truly broken and full of sorrow. He didn’t know how to comfort you himself. He really did want to go to your room and comfort you. But how could he if he was grieving and coming to terms to reality. 

So he did the only thing he could think of. He stood up and left. Leaving you to grieve on your own.

You sat on the floor, next to Nanami’s side of the bed. Tears streamed down your face as you gripped the blanket that belonged to Nanami’s side of the bed. 

Your hands were shaking and it honestly felt like you couldn’t breathe. 

All you could feel was a sense of grief, but there was a hint of something else. Anger. Anger towards the jujutsu society. How could they allow him to do something like this? On top of that, they couldn’t even tell you of his death. 

A kid had to deliver the news. 

That night, for the first time in many many years. You cried yourself to sleep. 

“You’ve reached Nanami, I am unavailable at the moment so please leave a message after the beep.” 

His voice echoes in your head as you stare off into space. 

It was the only way you could hear his voice. So you kept calling his number over and over again. Just to hear his deep voice. It somehow brought you comfort. Only for a while though. 

It held no real meaning afterall. He wasn’t really speaking to you. 

It was just enough to keep you down on earth. 

“Mrs. (y/n).” Yuuji says your name, a hand on your shoulder, pulling you out of your thoughts. 

You look at him, underneath your eyes still tinged red and swollen. Yuuji slightly cringes to himself. 

He wore a black suit, and you wore a black kimono. Funeral attire. It still didn’t feel real. But it had to be real now, right? 

You watched his casket be buried. You didn’t get to see him one last time though. It was a closed casket, which made you even more sick. 

Yuuji didn’t have the heart to tell you, but he knows if he didn’t then you would sit here for days on end. 

“It’s time to go home now.” He whispers. Yuuji had moved in. Hoping to help you with your grief, knowing that’s what Nanami would’ve wanted. You both needed each other, you just didn’t realize it yet. 

“Can I stay for five more minutes?” You whisper back, your voice cracking a bit. 

Yuuji nods his head, stepping a few feet back to give you your space and privacy. 

You turn back to his headstone. Reaching into the pocket of your kimono, you pull out your cell phone. 

It was like muscle memory now. Your fingers dance along the screen to click on Nanami’s profile. Just to hear his voice one more time. 

The phone rang only once this time, a different message waiting for you on the other side, 

"We're sorry; you have reached a number that has been disconnected or is no longer in service.”

[artbymyth]

“Everything in him recoiled. The water was cold against his legs. His body had gone numb and yet he could still feel the wet give of his brother’s rotting flesh beneath his hands. It’s shame that eats men whole. He was drowning in it. He was drowning in the Ketterdam harbor.”

[my-current-obsession]

every time i see bakudeku compared to k/ance (now specifically in terms of them getting shafted in the ending and/or accused of queerbaiting) i take psychic damage

[vaguely-concerned]

just going about my day idly contemplating how some of the ways hawke can interact with a romanced anders are not at all unlike how they interact with leandra (and a bit of carver too, especially with a purple hawke), and then thought about my hawke in the timeline where he romances anders and was hit straight in the face with 'was he ever actually in love, or was he just desperately trying to renegotiate with his mother's ghost in any way he could' and now i need to lie down. this is the power of dragon age 2

[unriding]

Moze was known for being sneaky and basically invisible, since barely anyone sees him while he sees everyone and everything. It might be creepy to think about, but this didn't intimidate you at all. Rather the opposite - this was one of the reasons why you became interested in him.

But your beloved would've never guessed that you can be the sneaky type too. At first, you sneaked into his heart slowly and carefully - and now you are sneaking sweet little messages on sticky notes everywhere he could see them.

Be it in his lunchbox, in his trouser pockets, on his daggers,.. everywhere he would find a sweet message like “Remember that you are so, so loved by me, Moze! ❤️” which he certainly wasn't used to seeing, but he didn't mind it in one bit.

He actually adores it and they became one of his favorite parts of the day - besides the part where he would see you.

So don't be surprised when you find a sticky note with the message “I love you, Evie.” one day too, and of course - he would've sneaked it into your lunchbox, too while watching your reaction in the shadows, slightly smiling to himself.

~ 💐 (18th door of the advent calendar)

[cuteniarose]

It’s almost 6 a.m and I can’t sleep because I’m being plagued by thoughts of The Latest OC

[girlivealwaysbean]

i want to be the strongest most unaffected aloofest person ever but im literally the weakest saddest cries at every inconvenience type of person and man.

[khioneee]

tap out. pt ii.

warnings. mentions of death, emotional distress, grief and loss, pregnancy.

a few years later, another tap-out ceremony arrives, but this time, the air feels different—heavier, somber. simon’s been gone for over a year, his deployment unexpectedly extended due to an incident overseas. you’d been told he couldn’t come home for a while, but that didn’t make the waiting any easier.

today, you stand among families who aren’t just here to tap out their loved ones but to say goodbye to those who didn’t make it home. tears stream down faces as loved ones gather around caskets, grieving the soldiers they’d lost. the sight fills you with a mix of dread and relief, knowing simon is still out there, waiting.

simon stands in formation, rigid as always, but he has a sense for you. before you even appear in his line of sight, he knows you’re near. but imagine his surprise when he catches a glimpse of you in his peripheral vision, a small bundle wrapped securely in your arms.

his heart hammers in his chest, quickening as he realizes what this means. his breath catches, his eyes fixed on you as you approach. you look up at him, your eyes sparkling, a knowing smile on your face as you watch the subtle changes in his expression—the slight twitch of his eyebrows, the way his breathing picks up as it dawns on him.

both of you had been trying for a baby before he left, and now, standing before him, you hold that precious life in your arms. it had been a struggle going through pregnancy without him, feeling his absence during every kick and every sleepless night. but seeing him now, looking more than ready to meet your child, all the pain fades away, replaced by a joy so profound it fills every inch of you.

‘daddy’s home,’ you whisper softly, tilting the blanket so simon can see her tiny face, fast asleep, a perfect mirror of him in miniature. she’s got his nose, his quiet strength already etched into her tiny features.

with tears in your eyes, you reach up, your hand finding his cheek, tapping him out in the gentlest of touches.

the moment your hand connects, simon moves, breaking formation as he pulls both of you into his arms, holding you close as if he’ll never let go. his voice is thick with emotion, barely a whisper as he murmurs, ‘my loves.’

you knew your husband had a reputation in the military—a man as cold and unyielding as steel, a fortress no one could break. but as he held you and your newborn in his arms, that carefully built facade cracked, revealing a vulnerable side of him that only you ever saw. the tough soldier was gone, replaced by a man whose heart lay entirely with his family.

‘do you want to hold her?’ you ask softly, watching his eyes light up with a blend of surprise and joy.

‘her?’ he whispers, voice catching on the single word, as if it’s almost too much for him to believe.

you nod, smiling through a haze of happy tears. ‘her.’

with slow, reverent movements, you pass your daughter to him, watching as she looks impossibly tiny cradled in his strong arms. simon looks down at her with a mixture of wonder and fierce protectiveness, as though he’s already memorizing every detail of her face.

as if sensing her father’s gaze, the baby yawns, a soft little sound that makes simon’s eyes shine with awe. you catch the faintest smile pulling at his lips, a rare, tender expression that he reserves only for moments like this.

he leans down, pressing his lips gently to her forehead. ‘never gonna let anything happen to you,’ he murmurs, voice thick with love and quiet promise.

while simon was lost in his quiet moment with your daughter, a loud shout cut through the air, breaking the peaceful silence.

‘is that our baby i see?!’

simon’s head snapped up, his expression immediately shifting to something harder. he turned to see soap grinning widely, practically bouncing with excitement. with a sigh, simon reached over and smacked the back of soap’s head, though his movements were careful not to jostle the sleeping baby in his arms.

‘there’s people grieving, you idiot,’ simon muttered, but soap only snickered, completely unfazed.

‘and what do you mean, ‘our’? she’s y/n’s and mine. you’re not part of this relationship, mate,’ simon added, his tone dripping with mock irritation.

but soap, undeterred, just ignored him and held out his hands, wiggling his fingers in a display of exaggerated excitement. ‘oh, come on! let me hold our child!’

simon groaned, looking down at you with a glance that seemed to ask, ‘do i really have to put up with this?’ but he couldn’t hide the tiniest hint of a smile tugging at the corner of his mouth as soap’s enthusiasm filled the air around you.

reluctantly, and with another sigh, simon finally leaned over, carefully passing your daughter to soap, though not without a low, ‘if you don’t keep her calm, you’re not holding her again.’

soap just grinned, taking her into his arms as if he’d won the lottery, cradling her gently and cooing softly.

soon after, the rest of task force 141 gathered around, drawn by the excitement, each member eager to catch a glimpse of the new addition to the family.

you and simon stood to the side, watching with cautious eyes as they took turns holding her, each one adopting a careful gentleness you wouldn’t have expected from hardened soldiers.

price held her with a proud grin, murmuring something about ‘training her to be the next captain,’ while gaz made her giggle softly with his gentle cooing. even the usually reserved roach softened as he held her, a rare smile tugging at his lips.

you glanced up at simon, watching his face as he stood beside you, arms crossed in a show of casual indifference.

but you knew him too well. beneath the mask of stoicism, there was something warmer, a subtle softness in his gaze as he watched his team, his family, sharing this moment with him. this gruff, unbreakable soldier, who had once thought he’d lost everything, had found a new family among them, one that shared in his joys and sorrows alike.

reaching over, you took his hand, giving it a gentle squeeze. he didn’t say anything, just gave your hand a quick squeeze in return, a quiet acknowledgment. but you could see it in his eyes, that gratitude for a family he never expected to find—a family that had now become part of yours.

[miyuskye]

I would like to also add!!!

1. When Elias calls him his full name (❤️) when reprimanding him about the complaint

2. When Jon is worried about the Leitners (ep 17 my beloved) and says he's going to have a discussion with Elias about it. And then randomly adds: I know he’ll just give me the old “record and study, not interfere or contain” speech again, but I at least need to make him aware of it.

which implies that a. it's so very usual for them to have conversations (about the institute and the paranormal and the statements) b. there were multiple discussions and conversations since the argument is "old" and they have probably been over this many times with super stubborn Jon and infinitely patient Elias (without knowing the plot it's fun to imagine Elias listening to Jon ramble but knowing the plot????? Jonah being so proud of his Archivist being this proactive but still that needs to be contained) (ahhhh I bet he was just as excited as Jon because of his enthusiasm but couldn't show it) c. Jon is super comfortable around Elias enough to bring up specific work-related points (instead of just taking care of them personally like how I imagine Gertrude would have done) and holds him in high esteem to discuss stuff thoroughly

Sometimes I truly want to sit into the Elias and Jon's dynamics pre-archives/Season 1 because (nottobepettyaboutpeoplewhoassumesjonautomaticallydislikeseliasfor???) I feel like it informs SO MUCH of how they behave later on. They clearly already have some sort of relationship that's based on both respect, freedom and guidance and, I feel, conversations.

"He's not smoking again, is he?" implies that Elias is not only aware Jon used to be a smoker, but has been at least involved in a periphical manner to Jon /stopping/ smoking, and approving of it. (Which, yes, drives me insane. We need so much more jonelias fics where Elias takes,, an active role in helping Jon stop that particular habit)

The fact the very first words that Jon adresses to the tape recorders are for Elias; that he's already discussed with him the problematic statements at all!

Jon acknowledging that Elias is the most knowledgeable man when it comes to the paranormal, which! again! I see so little people talk about but is a clear expression of Jon recognizing and admiring Elias's skills in his particular domain! AND is possibly the reason why he keeps coming back to him later on (and other people). Elias just! knows his stuff. And possibly he used to share a bit more with Jon :').

I don't know, the mere fact that Elias is like "Jon, we got a complain about you" and Jon only snarks "Fine, I'll be more lovely" and it's the end of it is insane to me. I know Elias IS known to be a passive boss, but EVEN SO. The freedom that's given to Jon, all along! Wild and beautiful.

Them flirting over Jon's birthday cake. I can see the scene. Their eyeing each other like they're two seconds away from kissing and everybody else has a moment of "oh, god, please don't, why do you make things uncomfy"

I don't know what this post is actually about, just. Elias and Jon. Getting along. From day one. JON ACTUALLY LIKING AND ADMIRING HIM. Yknow.