#all images of cats and also all real cats and also all furniture or food that is cat themed

[daydreams-after-dark]

Good things come in small packages

Part 1 | Part 2

Pairing: Mini Han x fem reader

Synopsis: One year ago you purchased a ‘miniature companion’ named Hannie. He’s the size of a Ken doll but alive and horny. But something unexpected happens on your one year anniversary.

Word count: approx 2k

A/n: Hey!!! It's finally here! My Mini Han oneshot (posted in a couple of instalments because I get too excited to share). The idea for Mini Han was born through a conversation with my girl @noellllslut (we always have the most unhinged thoughts). Then I wrote a little "imagining" here (which I’ve incorporated into this fic anyway, so you don’t have to read), which then sparked quite a bit curiosity amongst you sweet/filthy readers. Questions came, and I felt compelled to explore more of this theme.

I hope you enjoy this little fic. It's sweet and smutty, and as I kept writing, I fell in love with our dear y/n and Mini Hannie. I want one for myself tbh.

CW below the cut

CW: supernatural themes, oral sex, sexual acts, sexual themes, voyeurism

You've had your miniature human, Hannie, for almost a year?! You realize, sitting at your work desk as you look at your desktop calendar. You smile and make a note to organize a celebration for just the two of you, and to buy a cheesecake for dessert. Hannie loves cheesecake. Your smile grows. He always manages to get it all over him, then wants to get it all over you so he can lick it off you.

One year this coming weekend. It feels like time has flown, yet at the same time it feels like he’s been part of your life forever. Your heart bursts as you think back to how it all came to be.

You had been lonely. You'd broken up with your long term boyfriend and was feeling sad one night. So you went online to doom scroll, and online shop. You expected you'd end up down a rabbit hole of cat memes and be $500 down in shoe purchases, but instead an ad appeared on your screen.

"Miniature human companions" it said, with images of very attractive men. Miniature men. Were they human? Couldn't be. Were they robots? Probably. They must be really expensive to make which is why they are so small, you'd decided.

You were intrigued, so you researched the company, finding that this new type of 'companion' utilizes cutting edge technology that simulates actual human behavior and bodily functions.

By 4am you'd chosen your companion. His name was Han. He was adorable and attractive, with fluffy black hair and pouty lips, and from the personality trait notes, he sounded like a lot of fun.

"Pay Now". You can still remember the feeling of excitement that ran through you as hit the button to complete your purchase.

When he arrived, he came in a box with air holes, which you found kind of weird considering he didn't actually breathe oxygen. You set the box on your kitchen table, took a deep breath and lifted the lid. You gasped as you peered inside.

A little man, about the size of a Ken doll, sat on a blanket eating miniature crisps out of a miniature chip bag.

"Oh hello!" he looked up at you. "Are you my Noona?" he waved excitedly.

Holy fucking shit. You almost fainted as you stumbled to sit down on a dining chair.

You knew he was meant to talk, but he just seemed so real as he chewed his food then licked the seasoning off his lips like he could actually taste it. His little chest moved with his breath, like he was really breathing. Could he do everything a human can do? You wondered.

"My name’s Hannie." He said standing up and brushing the crumbs off his trousers.

"Um...I-I'm Y/n..." you stuttered, trying to process what you were witnessing,

"You're really pretty, Y/n." He beamed up at you with a gummy grin.

You prepared him a little space of his own, with a makeshift bed, clothing that you had also ordered from the company you purchased him from, and bought a set of Barbie sized cups, plates and furniture. You even bought him a Barbie Dreamhouse to live in, but he preferred to just climb up your full sized furniture and use that.

You studied the information manual that came with him and learned that he could in fact, experience life just as a human did. He needed to eat, sleep, wash, poop. Oh and he could get erections and ejaculate. Wow!

Over the next weeks and months you'd gotten yourselves into a routine, and became really close. He was your best friend. You did everything together, mostly staying at home. You assumed he was some sort of AI, and that's why you got along so well, but the longer he was with you, the more his own interests came to the surface. Like singing and Anime.

He helped you bake, often getting himself covered in flour and other ingredients. You'd watch movies together. Most nights you'd lay on the couch and he'd lay face down on your chest while you watched your favorites. Sometimes you'd feel him get hard against the curve of your breast, and you'd think inappropriate thoughts about him. You'd grow wet between your legs and wish he was able to touch you.

He loved it when you’d brush his hair with a tiny little hairbrush and sit him on your benchtop in the bathroom when you’re getting ready for the day. You know he loved it when you forgot he was there one time and you took a shower in front of him. He got so hard watching you soap up your body.

Sometimes you'd take him out on a picnic somewhere secluded near the ocean so he could freely move about the picnic blanket without fear of being seen. Or he'd sneak into your work bag and scare the shit out of you when you were working.

In the early days, you'd occasionally go on dates with actual men. Mostly to take your mind of your growing feelings for Hannie. You'd bring them home and fuck them in your bed, knowing he was somewhere watching, listening. You'd imagine him getting hard from your noises, and it made you moan even louder just picturing it. You'd imagine it was Hannie inside you too, pounding hard into your cunt, and making you come on his cock.

He was distant with you in the days after. He’d sit around sulking and pouting.

"What's wrong, Hannie?" You asked him after he’d ignored you for three days.

"Noona... it's just…I get so jealous of them." He burst into tears. "I want to do things like that to you. I want to the be the one who makes you come." He sobbed.

Things changed after that. You no longer went out with other men, and you and your miniature companion began to explore a more physical, more sexual, relationship.

From letting you see each other naked, to mutual masturbation, to eventually touching each other and making each other come.

You soon learned that even though Hannie is small, he is extremely talented with his mouth, and he can make you come harder than anyone had ever before.

One morning he noticed that you were still asleep, and very naked. The way you were laying, legs splayed out looked so inviting to him. You’d kicked your blanket off at some point. He couldn’t help himself.

You woke up to a sensation between your legs, and when you looked down you saw him kneeling between your your legs, using his arms to push your pussy lips open and doing his very best to lap at your clit.

“Hannie?” You whimpered. He stopped for a moment to stand up and wave at you, the entire front of his body dripping with your arousal. “I’ve just found my favorite thing to do!” He said enthusiastically and then he was back to being buried against your pussy.

These days, at night time he’ll climb up onto your chest while you’re lying in bed watching videos on your phone. He still loves to nestle against the bulge of your breasts, especially if you’re in a loose satin camisole, and he’ll slide himself under the fabric.

“What do you want to watch, Hannie?” You’ll ask him.

“Porn!” He’ll answer excitedly. The phone is like a giant screen to him and it’s never long before you feel him shimmying his clothes off and rubbing his little swollen erection against your skin.

He’s such a desperate little thing that you let him do whatever he needs to get himself off. Often, he’ll rub his cock along your bottom lip while he humps your tits, or he’ll scramble to suck on your nipple. He does his best to stretch his mouth around it, while he grinds against you and cumming on your soft skin. Then he’ll pass out right there. Poor little tyke gets himself tired.

Some of the kinkier things he gets you to do include tying him up and edging him until his cock becomes so painfully red and engorged that he’s crying. His naked body is delicious to look at, and you love to run the pad of your index finger over his muscles. He’s perfectly toned, his skin honey brown, and his cock is mouth-wateringly big for his frame.

He’s rendered helpless as you stroke your finger gently up and down his body. Then, using the tip of your tongue, you lick his cock carefully whilst shoving your pinky finger into his mouth.

There are times when you’ll dress up in lingerie covered in buckles and straps and he’ll climb up your body like he’s doing some kind of adventure hike. He gets so sweaty and very hard as he explores the terrain of your body.

He really is the perfect companion.

You are broken from your thoughts by your alarm signaling it's time to go home from work, and you hurry home to see your Hannie.

_____________

"Fuck! Hannie! Please... need to come...need one more...please. Don't stop." You pant. It's later that evening, and you're on the verge of your third orgasm with Hannie between your thighs sucking expertly on your clit. He's got your lips spread open as far as he can manage, and he's grinding against your core seeking his own release. Inside your pussy you've got your vibrator egg on full intensity. "Yes!!! Yes...coming!!!" You cry as you arch off the bed as you come all over him.

He quickly climbs up your body, almost slipping off because he’s covered in so much of your cream, and kneels on your chest to pump his cock until he’s spurting cum onto your tongue.

“Tastes so good, Hannie.” You show him your empty tongue, but he’s already collapsed across your body.

You clean him up and put him in his striped pajamas, before you both nestle into bed. You’re used to him sleeping on the pillow next to you now, although it took you a while to stop worrying you’d roll on him in the night.

“Noona? Did you know that tomorrow it’ll be one year since I came here?” He says sleepily.

You roll onto your side and smile. “Yes, actually I do, honey. Have a think about what you’d like to do to celebrate, okay. Anything you want."

He nods. “Yeah, I’ll think about it. But just so you know, it’ll involve me being buried in your pussy.”

————-

Han laid back on the pillow. What would he like to do to celebrate? He’d love to celebrate by being inside you. Properly. Fully.

He wishes he could do the things he'd seen those men you’d do to you all those months ago. To pin your legs up and fuck you so hard the bed would shake. He takes his mind back to when he’d hide on your shelf and watch, fucking into his hand and holding back tears of despair.

What would it be like to bend you over and fuck you from behind? What would it even be like to fuck you at all? He wants to know so bad.

But he does have a special relationship with you, he supposes. Not every guy has to stretch his mouth around a nipple or clit like he has to. Can those men be covered head to toe in your juices? Or lay completely across the bulge of your boob. No. They can’t. Only he can.

He pouts to himself.

He knows he’s got it good, you are his everything. But as he lays on the pillow next you and closes his eyes, he wonders if he’s enough for you? Could you give up real men forever, with real sized cocks that can stretch you out and fill you deep? Would you be okay with never having a boyfriend you could take out in public, or take to family events, or be seen with?

Could you settle for him? A miniature version of a man?

He sighs. "Goodnight, Noona. Love you." He whispers as he leans over and gives your giant lips a kiss.

"Goodnight, my sweet Hannie. I love you too." you reply sleepily.

As he drifts off to sleep he wishes what he always wishes. That he could be human sized and be with you like a proper human.

-----------

The morning sun peeks through your window, landing on your face and causing you to stir. You groan and try to stretch, but a heaviness across your middle keeps you in place. You peer down to find a man's arm wrapped around you, snuggling you tight.

Fear courses through your body, and you scream as you fling the arm off and jump out bed. You grab your lamp, ready to hit the intruder.

"Noona?" The man lifts his head, his dark locks falling around his face.

Your eyes almost pop out of your head when you see the confused look on his face. "Hannie!?" You choke, hands poised to strike.

"Noona? What are you doing?" he peers down at the pillow his head had been resting on, and then down the bed toward his feet. "Why is your bed so small?"

"Hannie?" You whisper, lowering the lamp, letting it drop to the floor.

"Why is everything so small? Wait. Why am I naked? Noona, have you been playing with me in my sleep?" He looks up at you confused and worried. "Noona, why are you looking at me like that?"

His eyes land on his pajamas, torn to shreds next to him. He picks up the scrap of fabric that was his pajama top, and his eyes widen. "Why are my clothes so tiny?"

"Hannie," you take in the man before you, naked and taking up most of the bed. "You're big."

To be continued…

@channieandhisgoonsquad @noellllslut @itsseohannbin @weareapackofstrays @3rachasdomesticbanana @palindrome969 @xxkissesforchanniexx @chuuchuu1224 @fun-fanfics @rhonnie23 @jisunglyricist @strayywayy @armystay89 @igetcarriedawaywithyou @mylittleponeypinkrosieposie @kyunchoni @justforreaders @melochacco @scenuniverse @oddracha @ismokeeweed @galaxycatdrawz @jiminssluttyminx @teddy-stay @kayleefriedchicken @imperfectlyperfectprincess1

[shmowder]

How are those so accurate? I love the image of Rubin and Artemy with a kitten, aww 🥹 And your Khan observation and theory, lol. You're so right about Alexander Saburov and Mark, too.

So I don't actually know very much about cats; as a cat person with allergies, I'd be joining Yulia in the pspspspsing at strays. Nevertheless, here are some vibes I'm getting.

Capella would have a Ragdoll cat for sure, with a ribbon for a collar. If Big Vlad were to ever have a cat, just google Cat that Looks like a Coal Baron, that's his. I can see Taya with a Himalayan, but it's also fun to picture her with a huge Maine Coon that's practically bigger than she is. Aglaya - some kind of tabby cat. Grief is also allergic to cats; I have no idea where I'm getting this but I feel it in my bones.

Who is particularly fond of orange cats? Somebody must be! My instinct is to say Yulia, actually. Or Artemy.

"The Kains do already have pets, the human kind. Aka the Stamatins." lmao this startled a laugh out of me.

🐿️ anon

YOU ARE SO RIGHT WITH ALL OF THIS

omfg Capella having an adorable ragdoll cat is so fitting. She dresses it in tidy bows and ruffles, it's the most polite cat ever. Very elegant looking and well behaved, it's one of the few cats Khan actually loves. Her cat and Notkin's jester surpsingly get along and have playdates in Capella's room. Or well the cat's room, let's be real, Capella probably has a whole room dedicated to her spoiled cat with a cat tree, a luxurious bed and everything.

Big Vlad also has a cat, but it follows him around instead and only sleeps on his lap. Literally that meme of the parent who didn't want a pet vs them chilling with the pet afterwards

Is this the cat you mentioned that looked like him?

I see it, I do. He probably does have a long hair cat.

You're so correct about Bad Grief being allergic to cats, I feel it in my bones too. That's probably why his lair is in different warehouse district than the souls and halves, He keept sneezing otherwise and just moved bases.

What's worse, cat's absolutely adore him. They enjoy rubbing their fur against his legs, he's like catnip for them for some reason and they purr and keep trying to climb up his legs.

It's also funny to imagine him having to deal with cat lovers Artemy and Rubin as kids. Especially with Isidor caring for stray cats and how these two took care of the kittens after their mom didn't make it. Lara helping them and all these kids looking after the kittens everyday but Grief is having the worst month of his life, his eyes won't stop watering, nose won't stop running and he's breaking out in hives.

Grief doesn't visit his friends as adults, not because of a grudge or anything but because all three of them won't stop making their home a 5 stars hotel for stray cats and he can't take two steps inside without sneezing his lungs out.

Those are good candidates for orange cat owners, but hear me out. Listen Listen.

Aglaya is the person who owns THAT communical one-braincell orange cat. And the cat never gets its turn with the braincell ever.

The cat has zero survival instincts. It sleeps on the stove frequently, it runs away from bugs, and it lets a mouse steal its food. It gets stuck on furniture and high places all the time and meows loudly until someone helps it down before immediately climbing up and getting stuck again.

Was this whole post just an excuse for me to subject my readers to looking at these adorable cat pictures i found? Probably.

So Maria's cat is one of those majestic short haired sleek black cats. It's also the cat which traumatised/scratched Khan when he was a kid and now he holds a grudge against all cats bc of it.

It's unfriendly to anyone who's not Maria, it's a very well loved cat that demands respect and will bite and scratch if you touch its fur out of the blue. You must present your hand to be sniffed first and then the cat will decide if you're worthy enough

It has a shiny well maintained coat, Maria spares no expenses. The collar is made out of real gold and gems, she even commissioned a couple paintings of her cat to hang around her wing of the crucible.

[tootiewithablog]

Through my eyes

 I would like to start off by explaining the importance of the five images I'll be sharing with you all today. Before I get started, I'll be giving a brief disclaimer that I am nowhere near a photographer. However, the real art and meaning is what's within the photos. However, the real art and meaning is whats within the photos. I started off strong by inserting him eating a fried chicken drumstick. He is an outside cat and doesn't go crazy for treats. However, he enjoys human food. I admire this picture being I captured it just when he was biting in. Moving along, he walks in my room all the time. Magneto jumps on furniture and knocks stuff down, but this time he laid in bed with me. You might think, "So? any cat lays next to their owner", well thats not why I took the picture. If you take a good look, you are able to notice the position he is in. To me, Mangito is laying like old man with zero problems. His leg up in the camera, whiskers are long and out, and he's looking directly into cam. The third picture is my favorite. I was getting ready in my moms room when I walked passed her head then glimpsed at her bed. I caught Mangito sleeping all cute. Continuing to the next one of him sleeping again except he's covering his face, plus he's on the dining table. I find him super cute in the image inserted because he looks like a baby. Lastly, ending the 5th picture with my brother holding magneto. When we first got the cat, we were undecided what to name him. Then, one day my brother calls him mangito (mango). Odd name when the cats grey but it stuck. Magneto and my brother have a very close bond that being they fight a lot. Holding mangito like infant is what we do because he's our big baby. The importance of sharing these moments of mangito is to persuade you guys to also get a cat. There are many more moments that I capture of mangito but these are saved in my favorites. 

[icewindandboringhorror]

one of my dream business ideas is a half cat cafe half art gallery combo named something like “Cats Of The Forbidden Realm” and it’s mostly all modern and clean with like natural lighting and pastel colors with chairs that are shaped like cats and tables with cutesy cats drawn on them and cat shaped sandwiches and bright pretty toys for all the cats and shelves for them to climb on and etc. (as a cat cafe should be) but then the bright happy cleanliness is juxtaposed with the  gallery of images displayed on the walls which are all like, anatomically off or otherwise offputting and strange looking portrayals of cats, like people can display their art to be sold in the cafe but only if it looks unusual in a way that makes it slightly unsettling, so it’s like a typical cutesy cat cafe but also incorporating my usual admiration of surreal and somewhat ominous cat depictions (like the ones above for example)... trulye a dream job 

[un-beel-ievable]

Obey Me! Headcanons - The Demon Brothers react to a MC who owns a golden retriever 🐕

Author’s note: I'm home :3 Feel free to reblog, but please do not repost!! If you enjoy my writing, do leave me a like and/or a comment (and follow me to see similar content in the future :D)!

_____

Lucifer ☕

• When your dog first bounds over to greet Lucifer, it’s difficult to tell if the eldest born is a fan of your four-legged pal or not. The Avatar of Pride scrutinizes the ball of fluff as if he were a judge on a dog show —all the while as your dog vibrates impatiently by the front door with a tennis ball in its mouth. Perhaps it senses the need to be on its best behaviour if it’s to impress Lucifer.

• “A pet is a responsibility, not a novelty. I sincerely hope that you thought long and hard about the obligations of a pet owner before you went ahead with your decision to adopt. That being said, you appear to be doing quite well with your four-legged companion —they’re very well behaved. I have absolutely no qualms with you taking over Cerberus’s care when you return to the House of Lamentation; clearly you’d manage much more elegantly than my brothers. Perhaps Cerberus would enjoy the company of your charming pooch as well…”

• So Lucifer does like your dog. Not an entirely surprising revelation, if you’ve seen how he behaves around Cerberus in private. The strict no-nonsense archdemon turns into the softest dog owner that you’d ever have the pleasure of meeting; he’s all ear scritches and belly rubs. By the end of his visit, your dog is blissfully rolling on the carpet by Lucifer’s feet as the Avatar of Pride informs it over and over again that it is indeed “a good dog”.

• Perhaps you’ll even catch the small —but genuine— smile twitching at the corners of Lucifer’s lips as he does so.

Mammon 💳:

• In hindsight, perhaps giving Mammon a heads up about the presence of your pooch would have been a good idea.

• Despite your numerous attempts to reassure Mammon that the furry ball of enthusiasm barreling towards him is a Good Dog™, the terrified shriek that escapes the Avatar of Greed is shrill and ear-splitting enough to shatter your windows (Metaphorically speaking, of course. Rest assured, no windows were harmed in the writing of this headcanon.). When your dog leaps at him to nudge its head into his hand for scritches™ and headpats™, Mammon’s life flashes before his eyes. The only image that he can bring to mind before he passes out cold on your carpet is Cerberus’s terrifying snarl.

• When Mammon comes to, your dog is sitting on his chest —looking concerned and suitably chastised for accidentally scaring the living daylights out of the demon. (Even though Mammon refuses to come clean about how terrified he was. “The great Mammon? Afraid of a lil’ dog? W-What...What are ya talkin’ about? I wasn’t scared!”) The events that occurred over the last couple of minutes play on a loop in Mammon's mind. It finally dawns on him that your dog isn’t the ferocious beast that his imagination had conjured up, and his cheeks flush scarlet.

• Please give your demon a hug. I think he needs one. Or several.

Leviathan 🎮:

• If Leviathan had a pet ranking system, Henry 1.0 and Henry 2.0 would always claim the highest spots possible —the S-tiered, 5-star gods of the pet world. No golden retriever could ever worm its way to the top and snatch his love for them from under his feet. Sorry. But your dog is pretty cute, he’ll give you that.

• Too cute, maybe. Hey...um...you don’t love your dog more than you love him, right? What? Him, the Avatar of Envy, jealous? No! Of course not! Why would you make such an outrageous assumption? He’s not jealous —an adorable fluff ball of enthusiasm for the outdoors and joy is a way better than an icky otaku, after all. Leviathan doesn’t blame you for choosing your dog over him. Any sane individual would do the same...

• When you finally manage to reassure your demon that your dog is in no way competition for the affection that you hold for him, —he’ll always be your favourite demon, even if you have a dog. Even if you have a hundred dogs. Nothing is going to change that— he begins looking at your pooch in a different light. That’s right —as a potential cosplay partner. There’s this new anime that’s been released recently...Levi was wondering if you had heard of it? It’s titled: My Partner Is The Proud Owner Of A Golden Retriever And I’m An Otaku Who Enjoys The Simple Pleasure Of Collecting Merchandise and Cosplaying. One of the main characters happens to own a golden retriever as well, and if you’re willing to give him your blessing (the irony, I know), perhaps you’d lend him your pooch for an afternoon of cosplay and photography?

Satan 📚:

• Satan is a cultured demon who enjoys the company of four-legged companions, but he’s admittedly a fan of felines...not canines. Still, he prides himself on keeping an open mind towards new experiences, so he agrees to spend an afternoon with you and your dog (Even though he’d much rather be attending the opening day ceremony of the Devildom’s newest cat cafe. The things he does for love.).

• He performs some through research before meeting your dog for the first time; spending afternoon after afternoon in the sanctuary of his room reading about dogs and how to care for them. No number of books could prepare him for the real thing, however. When Satan first comes over to spend the afternoon in your home, he’s stiff and awkward —unsure of what to do with a dog. He ends up spending the first hour on your couch, sipping tea and spouting facts about golden retrievers.

• Show him the rope that your dog enjoys playing tug-of-war with, or the tennis ball that it insists on carrying in its jaws everywhere it goes. It takes a while for Satan to warm up to your pooch, but he’ll gradually learn to love —or at the very least, tolerate— your canine companion, even though he still firmly believes in the superiority of cats. Speaking of which, you’d accompany him on a date to that new cat cafe, right?

Asmodeus 💋:

• Oh! Your golden retriever is absolutely adorable! And gorgeous too —albeit not as beautiful as him, but that’s to be expected. There’s not a single individual in all of the three realms that could match up to his beauty. And your dog has such luscious fur too...dear Diavolo, he’d kill to have a haircare routine that’s as effective on his locks.

• Would you be willing to take a photo of him posing with your pooch? It’s for his Devilgram followers, of course —such beauty must be shared with the world, no? You’re not entirely sure if Asmo’s referring to his beauty, your dog’s beauty, or the shared, collective beauty of him and your dog. It doesn’t particularly matter. The two (three?) of you end up spending the entire afternoon orchestrating an impromptu photoshoot, and then spending the evening editing the photographs from said shoot for Devilgram.

• Generally gets along with your four-legged companion like a house on fire. There’s just one, itsy-bitsy issue.

• Your dog sheds. A ton. No matter how often you brush its fur, or how many boundaries you set about it not being allowed on the furniture, it seems determined to shed every carpet, sofa and bed that you own. Asmo never stops whining about the copious amounts of fur that now decorate every article of clothing he owns, but at least your dog seems happy to be able to leave its mark —on Asmo’s ensembles, of course, but also his heart.

Beelzebub 🍔:

• Corporate has asked you to find the difference between this picture and this picture—

• Asmo gets along well with your dog. Beel gets along with your dog even better. As one of the few only brothers who’s willing to spend any amount of time with Cerberus (granted, most of the time he’s only doing so because he’s been promised free food), Beel has grown into quite the dog lover. Your dog seems thrilled to be in the company of someone who appears to wholeheartedly enjoy its company —your dog is thrilled by the company of anyone who’s willing to give it their time of day, but still— and Beelzebub is thrilled to be in the company of a four-legged companion who appears to wholeheartedly enjoy his company. Beel is happy to spend whole afternoons playing with your dog...interspaced with the occasional snack break, of course.

• Speaking of which, Beel very much struggles with not giving into your golden retriever’s extremely convincing puppy dog eyes. Objectively, he knows that giving your dog human (or demon) food is a terrible idea —the last thing he wants is to be the reason that your dog has to take a trip to the vet. But your dog is so cute! And it’s looking at his food with such an intense longing in its eyes...Beel can relate to that. Surely a little nibble wouldn’t hurt…

• When you find yourself having to tell Beel off, suddenly you find yourself at the receiving end of 2 sets of puppy dog eyes; both Beel and your pupper are very sorry. They swear it’ll never happen again! Please don’t be upset…

• How are you supposed to stay mad at them?

Belphegor 🛏:

• ...listen.

• It’s not that he hates dogs. Honestly! He likes dogs as much as the next demon! But they can be loud and yappy and so incredibly energetic, and your golden retriever is more hyper than most. It always wants to go on walks, or play fetch, or make him throw its favourite tennis ball over and over again but refuse to hand it over so he has to engage in a slobbery game of tug-of-war to steal the ball from it —it’s just too much for the Avatar of Sloth. Just watching your dog zip across the room in a display of its endless amounts of energy is enough to tire Belphie out...is playtime over yet? He just wants to take a nap.

• Makes multiple attempts to talk you into allowing Beel to look after your dog. Just for an afternoon! His twin certainly has the energy to keep your hyperactive pup entertained for the whole day, and since you can be assured that your dog is well taken care of, perhaps the two of you could finally stay inside for once and take a nice, long nap. It’s been too long since he’s gotten to hold you in his arms…

• By the time Beel returns your dog to you, it’s all tuckered out from its day of adventures. As you’re thanking Beel for looking after your dog for the day, you catch him chuckling softly at something over your shoulder —Belphie and your furry friend, dozing off together on the couch. They appear to finally be getting along.

BONUS: I'm still not terribly comfortable with adding the (former) undatables to my writing repertoire, but my partner happens to be very fond of the demon butler...and I happen to be very fond of them. So just this once, just to see how it goes...

Barbatos 🍵:

• Oh? So this is the sweet bundle of fur that he’s heard so much about. It’s a pleasure to meet them at long last. Barbatos has always been fond of dogs, and your dog is quite an endearing creature to say the least...it actually reminds Barbatos of Cerberus when he was a puppy. How time flies.

• Treats your dog as if it were an esteemed guest of the castle. As long as Barbatos is around, you needn’t lift a finger when it comes to the care of your beloved pet. Keeping your dog fed and watered? Barbatos has it covered; the butler seems to have an in built in timer when it comes to feeding your dog —Barbatos serves its meals at exactly 6 in the morning and 6 in the evening. Not a minute early, not a minute late. When taking your dog out on walks, he carries a spare bottle of water for the sole purpose of offering it to your dog if it gets thirsty. Speaking of walks...Barbatos is more than happy to escort your pooch on walks in the event that you’re unavailable to do so yourself. Barbatos generally allows your golden to lead the way on their excursions, and is content with following along behind it to keep it out of trouble for however long it wishes to remain outdoors. If it were to tire itself out, Barbatos takes your dog into his arms and carries it the rest of the way home.

• Your pooch becomes very spoiled very quickly. It’s unclear if you’ve gained a butler...or if your dog has.

[6480n]

Looking for fellow creatives for a fantasy project!!

Hi all! I’m looking for other people who might be interested in collaborating on a hobby world-building project. !!Please help me find people by reblogging this post!!

[ID: Sketch of someone waving cheerfully at the viewer. end ID]

This world is designed to be the basis for a magic-based, multiplayer platformer fantasy game similar in ways to Maplestory and Fantasy Life, where the player character travels throughout various cool and magical realms. If you want to learn more about the world, please check out the information under the “read more” (I didn’t want the post to get too long).

Some stuff about me: I’m a Thai-American genetics student/researcher with heavy interests in evolutionary biology and Southeast Asian culture. I like to draw/design in my free time. I’m looking for people who are interested in contributing (to any degree), especially those who have an interest in biology, ecology, or sociology/anthropology. I would love to be able to work with other people from cultures that are underrepresented in the fantasy genre (though ofc not a requirement). No skills necessary!!! I'm able to handle all the art and visual design load on my own, I'm just looking for anyone imaginative!

I tend to be very realism-focused, so I’m hoping that input from others will help this world blossom into a more fantastical, wondrous setting. You don’t have to commit to anything--if you want, you can just hang around a bit and see if it interests you, or just provide input once in a while.

This is currently just a fun side-project that I work on in my spare time. I want to make it clear that even though I’m designing it with a videogame in mind, there really is no guarantee that it would ever get to that point, and I don’t want anyone to join with the hope that it would eventually pay off monetarily. I’ll make sure that anyone who contributes heavily will get a say in where the project eventually goes, if it turns out to last long.

Please contact me on Tumblr or Twitter to get involved! I plan on making a Discord server to keep all our collaboration in one place, invites given by PM.

[All images described in alt-text]

The premise of the world is that flora and fauna are not separate beings, but instead that all animals start their lives as plants, turn into animals, and then at death they create seeds which sprout into new plants. People also go through this life cycle--when they start out life they’re the huge, slow-growing plants that provide the structure for complex ecosystems (pine trees, kelp, huge cactuses), and then when they become people, their community cares for the ecosystem in question.

--MAIN GOALS--       - To build a work in the fantasy genre that rejects the overwhelmingly common eurocentric and often colonialist setting, as well as incredibly popular westernized systems of fantasy morality (light v. dark, demons v. angels, etc)       - To portray fictional cultures in a way that highlights the incredible diversity of IRL cultures without stereotypes or homogeneity       - To show the interconnectedness of everything, including showing different groups of humans as being connected with each other and showing humans as part of the environment; actively rejecting contemporary notions of “mastery over nature”

!!Everything below here is subject to change!!

Since I’m heavily interested in evolutionary bio, I built the biology of this world on the premise that life evolved much like it did on our world, starting from a single organism and blossoming out into different branches. Humans, or rather “people”, evolved multiple different times whenever a complex, dense ecosystem arose. Here are the groups of people I’ve come up with. The player chooses which species they want to start out as, and the dominant weapons or magic style of that culture determines the combat style they first learn to use. (Each group of people has multiple different subcultures, but there would be one “main” subculture that players start out in.)

Merfolk/seafolk:

Perhaps some of the earliest peoples, seafolk start their lives as kelp and inhabit the thick kelp forests that surround many coastlines. They have a love for exploration and discovery, but generally avoid encroaching on land. Their magic generally has to do with water, and the weapons they use are mechanical crossbows and heavy blunt weapons (blunt weapons integrated with controlling/redirecting the flow of water to lend force to blows). I haven’t figured out which real-world cultures to draw on for inspiration for seafolk societies, since nobody IRL lived underwater, of course. This is probably the most open-ended group of people. They’re visually based on fish and salamanders.

Frostfolk:

These people start their lives as conifers and thus inhabit the taiga and tundra. Their magic mostly has to do with ice, cold, or wind, and their main weapon of choice is spears. In this group of people, I want to have different societies: a nomadic hunting/fishing society, a nomadic pastoral society, and a more sedentary river/forest-based society. They’re based visually on dinosaurs, specifically theropods, with perhaps more bird-like features.

(No name yet):

Related to frostfolk but now geographically isolated from them, these people start their lives as cycads and live in the tropics, especially on chains of islands. Some subcultures would be highly seafaring, while some would be more sedentary and involved with metal-working and smithing. For the sedentary cultures, their magic would revolve around utilizing fire, and weaponry would be small blades made from obsidian. They are also based on theropods, but would have more vibrantly colored feathers like tropical birds.

Dustfolk:

Based on carnivorous mammals, mainly cats, foxes, and coyotes, these peoples start their lives as succulent plants like giant cacti. They inhabit the deserts and canyons of the world and live a largely nomadic life. Their magic has to do with wind/sandstorms, and their main combat styles are focused on hand-to-hand combat, utilizing claw or knuckle weaponry.

Plainsfolk/brushfolk(?):

These people start their lives as deciduous trees, generally as part of savannas, or sparse forests on mountainsides. They are based visually on ungulates, mainly deer/antelope, goats, and pigs/boars. I plan to have a semi-nomadic subculture in the dry savanna, a more sedentary agricultural society in the tropical savanna, and a mountainous society. Their weaponry would use a combination of sword and shield, and they would utilize light magic by way of reflective metal or glass.

(No name here either... they’re humans):

Finally, there would be a species of primate-based people that start their lives as broadleaf evergreen trees and inhabit the tropical jungles of the world. Many of their societies would be agricultural, with some fishing river-based cultures. Their magic would be related to monsoons and thunderstorms, especially lightning magic, and they would use long, thin blades for fighting.

---

In addition to the "main" cultures of the world, there would be many cultural centers where multiple peoples meet and trade food, goods, and technology. People will not be divided by nation borders or "species".

Currently, my idea is that combat is used to battle metaphorical representations of disease, malaise, generally bad and imbalanced things. I haven't developed this part of the storyline too much yet, I just know some thematic goals I might have.

In addition to combat (either physical or magical-based depending on the player's preference), players would be able to pursue a few different skills, like farming/breeding using a robust genetics system, tailoring/clothes-making, furniture/crafts-making, smithing, healing, cooking; as well as more "meta" hobbies like making maps and puzzles for other players to use.

Again, if you're interested in getting involved or have any questions, you can reach out to me here on Tumblr or on Twitter. If people do end up being interested, I'd like to make a small community on Discord to chat with! Edit: We do have a discord server now, you just have to ask to join!

[solarscholarsofmagick]

4 Ways to Juggle Adult Life With Your Craft

As the years go by, teenagers who experiment with witchcraft grow into adults. Some of these adults keep with the craft and find a lifestyle that really speaks to them. But, as we grow into adulthood, life (and our responsibilities) change. All of a sudden, we have jobs, relationships, finances, and more. At the end of the day, this means that life becomes busy. So busy, in fact, that sometimes our craft becomes lost and it become hard to find time between it all.

Miss your craft? Here are some tips to help you find your magick again!

1. All the Small Things, True Care Truth Brings

Magick doesn’t always need to include elaborate, skyclad rituals. There are tons of small, magick-filled actions that you can easily incorporate into your life on the fly.

A simple cleansing. You can clean more than your physical body in the shower. Imagine the soap taking the dark sludge of negative energy with it down the drain.

Charm your perfume as a quick and easy glamour. You can also do this to your make-up as well! Glamours are essentially real-life shape-shifting and/or invisibility spells. Here’s a quick glamour, if you don’t know where to begin:

*******************************************************************************************

Ingredients:

A rose quartz crystal

An amethyst crystal

10 (preferably small) regular quartz crystals

A black candle

Procedure:

Find a flat surface.

Place the candle down and place the rose quartz in front of the candle and the amethyst behind the candle.

Place 5 of the regular quartz crystals to the left of the candle and the other 5 to the right. The crystals should form a circle around the candle.

Light the candle and chant, “By my will, I shall control perception of me.”

Wait until the candle burns out.

Place the amethyst, rose quartz, and 1 of the quartz crystals either in your bottle/cap of perfume or in a baggy near where you get ready for the day. This will need to be charged once a week!

*******************************************************************************************

Take 5 minutes each day to say your thanks/prayer to your gods. This doesn’t need to be spoken out loud. You could even think it while on the bus!

Coordinate the colors of your outfit with your intent for the day. For example, wear blue to help with a stressful event, yellow if you want it to be a happy day full of good communication, green if you are asking for a raise, et cetera. Colors hold power!

As an easy offering to your gods, make a playlist dedicated to them.

2. Going Incognito

Sometimes, we want to proudly display our witchiness. However, with the stigma behind witches, sometimes we want to be recognizable to other witches, but not to the mundane.*

Wear crystal necklaces. While the popularity of this is growing, every time I see someone wearing a crystal necklace, I wonder.

Wear clothing with your deity’s image or symbol(s) on it. Not only is this noticible to other witches, but this is also a wonderful and easy way to worship said deity.

Try out rune/sigil nail art. To others who are not familiar, they will appear as simply abstract art.

Magickal symbol tattoos. The same logic as the last point applies to this one.

Find a community of witches near you! Having a community means that there is a space where you don’t have to hide who you are. Back in the so-called olden days, we could use a website called Witch’s Vox, but at the time of writing this article, it is going away soon. Instead, it is easy to find a community by looking for your local pagan society, Facebook groups, or other social media. You can even find a community online! Websites good for that include Reddit, Tumblr, and the Amino app.

3. Baby Shield Me One More Time!

No matter how busy, actually, especially if you’re busy, shielding is a very important task. If you are an empath, one could argue that it’s absolutely necessary. By shielding, I do not mean walking around with an actual shield. It means using your magick to protect yourself from unwanted negative energy. Sometimes this energy comes in the form of the stress from those around you, too many emotions or energy from a crowd around you, and even a magickal (usually psychic) attack. This writer’s favorite way of shielding is to imagine a golden, shimmering, impenetrable bubble.

4. You’re Stressed? Have You Tried Yoga?

A little stress is good for you! It’s what kept our species alive by telling us, “Hey, you should worry about this for your survival,” such as for finding reliable food and water and guarding against predators. However, there is a line (that is different for every person, dog, cat, and hedgehog), where it becomes unhealthy. Too much stress can impact your sleep and eating habits, your mental health, your productiveness, and even your physical health. If your stress is so bad that it is severely impacting your quality of life, you should consider speaking to a medical professional. So, as you read the tips below, remember, magick should be a supplement to medical help, not a substitution!

Carry a rose quartz with you. This crystal is known for its strong properties of calming and confidence. Alternatively, selenite will continually cleanse and shield your aura from negativity and/or harm.

Burn a blue candle/wear blue clothing. Once again, we reach the idea that colors are powerful! Blue is the most common color used for calming. Try burning one while meditating!

Meditating is probably one of the most irritating thing that people suggest when you say you are stress, but it really has the potential to help alongside professional help. The point of meditation is to work on controlling your state of mind. It is also a wonderful way to reach a solution to a particular problem that has been stressing you out.

Cleanse your working and living area. Chances are, your stress has caused the area to be saturated with negative energy. The more you stress, the more negative energy seeps from you, which causes more stress, becoming a vicious cycle.

Ever heard of Fung Shui? It is defined as a system of laws considered to govern spatial arrangement and orientation in relation to the flow of energy (qi), and whose favorable or unfavorable effects are taken into account when siting and designing buildings. Basically, it means that the way you organize your furniture has an impact on how energy flows around you.

Have any personal favorites for how you incorporate your craft into your adult life? Share them in the comments below!

*The Solar Scholars of Magick are not comparing the attitudes of people towards witches to those attitudes towards religious and ethnic minorites.

If you liked this article, please consider supporting us by visiting our website, here!

[thatmultifandomhoe]

The Extremely Large Tag Game

ATagged By: @dreamystuffers​ thank you sweet pea and HOLY SHIT THIS REALLY IS THE ULTIMATE TAG GAME BUT I AM READY.

SECTION ONE: First and last tag: post the first line of a wip as well as the last line you’ve written so far!

So I have several Wips at the moment and whelp, I’m gonna do them all lol.

The Size of a Heart: Wonho and Reader (Drabble)

First Line Written: The sky was burning as the sun set for the night, cloaking the city in its familiar darkness.

Last Line Written: “I tell myself that it’s better if it hurts, but I…I can’t anymore…I can’t.”

Tentatively Falling: Vampire Jongdae and Reader (Series)

First Line Written: Strobe lights flashed around the dark bar, drawing your attention every now and then when they went wild as the bass dropped.

Last Line Written: It was more than you ever thought, but it was exactly what you dreamt about hearing him say.

Heavenly Father: Boyfriend Yoongi, Priest Jimin, Alter boy Jungkook, and Reader (Smut Crack Drabble - Title May Change)

First Line Written: The stain glass windows in the Church were a sight to see during the day, the sunlight streaming through and bringing life to the images during the service, and brought a sense of comforting to those during times of trouble.

Last Line Written: Jimin groaned and your eyes watered when your nose was pressed against the base, his dick down your throat.

Knitting You a Home: Wolf Hybrid Namjoon and Reader (Series)

First Line Written: The wind howled while rain pelted your house as the storm refused to let up.

Last Line Written: For the moment, his thoughts were cleared, allowing him to fall asleep with you safely in his arms.

SECTION TWO. Enter 15 of your biases and put them in this order to discover the story of your life

Parent: Hongjoong

well I mean he is pretty daddy at times

Sibling: Jongdae

Grandparent: Sammy

Haunts you: Vernon

Significant other: Jooheon

HELL YEAH BITCHES

Ex: Yuta

damn that’s...that’s a change

Best friend: Chanyeol

Proposed to you: Yoongi

Was this before Jooheon or after Jooheon? Who’s my ass with?

Your boss: Taeyong

Random person you meet a the bar: Seonghwa

Rival: Bang Chan

BUT HE’S THE SWEETEST HUMAN BEING THO

First kiss: Namjoon

Drunk and singing karaoke with: Wonho

Played seven minutes in heaven with: Felix

Gave you your favorite dessert: Jackson

I...I can see this one. He’s sweet to do that

SECTION THREE. Describe your bias by their vibes as if they were someone in your life. (I’m doing my Ults, 1 from each group.)

Jongdae (EXO): The guy that everyone knows because he’s the one with that distinguishable laugh. The class clown that knows the limits and only crosses them on rare occasions. You think you know him but then he’ll say something that you never knew about him. Craves his independence but is the quiet one when in a large group, smiling as he watches the more energetic ones run about. An old soul trapped in a young body.

Yoongi (BTS): The one who devotes himself to his work and rarely sees the light of day. His room is littered with empty to go cups of coffee mixed with his own assortment of coffee mugs Coffee ring stains on furniture. You think he’s not listening or paying attention but when you least expect it, he’ll quietly do something or hand you a gift that he knows you treasure. He’ll never ask for cuddles, but he’ll always give them to you and refuse to let you go when you try to get up. Wise beyond his years because he’s suffered and doesn’t wish it on anyone else.

Yuta (NCT): The popular guy that at first everyone warns you about, but once you get to know him yourself, you don’t know why they warned you in the first place because he’s a total sweetheart. The guy who flirts with everyone and anyone, but remains loyal to his girl. He’s never without his iced coffee, and he’s dyeing his hair in the bathtub with a friend to help make sure it doesn’t go too wrong. Will entertain your drunk texts. He’s the one to text at 2 am when you’re feeling alone and down and he’ll do what he can to lift you back up with nothing but the truth.

Hongjoong (Ateez): He’s the guy who doesn’t give a shit about trends or styles, he creates his own. The guy who does the piercings at the local tattoo shop knows him by name because he’s gotten so many of his piercings done there. He is the Fashion DIY King. Will roast his friends the hardest  because he loves them the most and takes it when they dish it back. Somehow manages to rock hairstyles - long live the mullet - that no one thought should have ever existed. Don’t let him cook though. If he cooks you’ll end up with food poisoning. He’s the one who will let you try makeup tricks and new products on him. Secretly amazing at painting nails.

Wonho (Monsta X): He’s the guy friend that you never expected to be friends with. Him? You? Total opposites on a physical scale. On completely different levels. Once you get to know him, he’s a total teddy bear. Doesn’t question it when you suddenly appear and hug him without saying a word, he’ll simply hug you back while maintaining the conversation he had going. Or he’ll simply surprise you with a hug because he likes them.

Bang Chan (Stray Kids): He’s the one that always has his earbuds in even during class. Like he’s the guy that has the earbud going through the sleeve of his hoodie and is pressing his palm against his ear to listen to the music. Listens to everyone, even if he doesn’t know them that well and gives really good advice if they ask for it.

Jackson (Got7): The guy that you can hear a mile away. Hyper. Can’t sit still to save his life. He was the guy that you’d see doing laps in the hallway with his friends when he should have been in class, but he was the nice one. Passionate and when you ask him about what he’s working on, he’ll talk about it for hours. Will also apologize multiple times for going on but then continue to go on.

SECTION FOUR. Search your name + “core aesthetic” on Pinterest and make yourself a moodboard

SECTION FIVE. Make a normal and fantasy version of yourself using this !

SECTION SIX. Writing tag game!

What is your ideal setting for focusing on your writing?

A quiet office where I can play music softly in the background and be at a desk with a comfortable chair.

 What Genre do you prefer to write?

Slice of Life, Young Adult, College Age.

Do you prefer to write on paper or digitally?

Both.

It’s the middle of the night and you suddenly wake up with an idea. What do you do?

Make a note of it in either my notebook or in the notes section on my phone.

Who is your favorite person to write about?

Jimin and Hoseok

Do you like making your own characters, or do you usually write about real people?

I like to do both. Honestly, it’s kinda like a mix of both. With some of my fics, the only thing that makes them fanfics are that I’m using the real person’s name, and I’ll pin point on certain aspects of their physical features. In Brotið Hjarta, the only thing that connects to it being Namjoon is his name, and maybe his hair style/color and ear piercings, everything else was what I imagined it to be.

Have you ever written a book/story with more than 15 chapters (100K words)?

Yes. Strawberry Cream and BBQ

How often do you get ideas?

From everyday life, sometimes I’ll be daydreaming and it kinda morphs into a story or a fanfic and so I’ll make notes so that I don’t forget it.

Do you ever get an idea that you really like, but just can’t seem to finish?

Yessss, all the time.

What is your least favorite plot?

I don’t know about least favorite plots, but I do hate it when fics dive straight into a story without any background or anything. Wait, so maybe that’s pwp fics????? I don’t want to be a hypocrite, but even with my fics that primarily focus on smut, I still add in those background details and give them a teeny tiny plot.

SECTION SEVEN. Put your music on shuffle and reveal the first ten songs that come on.

The Kids Aren’t Alright - Fall out Boy

In the Dark - Bring Me the Horizon

Teeth - 5 Seconds of Summer

All In - Monsta X

To the Beat - Ateez

Shot - Lil’ Jon

Daechwita - Agust D

Treasure - Ateez

Adore You - Harry Styles

Guys My Age - Hey Violet

SECTION EIGHT. Questions tag:

Relationships: 2

Break-ups: 2

Kids: Right now? 0

Brothers and Sisters: 1 older brother.

Pets: 0

Surgeries: 0

Tattoos: 0

Countries you’ve been to: 0

Been in an airplane: yes

Been in an ambulance: yes

I sing karaoke: hell no.

Ice skating: I like it but I suck at it and have only been able to go during school events in the past.

Been on a cruise: hell no

Driven a motorcycle: nope

Ridden a horse: yes

Stayed in a hospital: nope

Favorite fruit or berry: Raspberries

Favorite color: Magenta

Last text: “Perfect! I’ll let you know when I am able to send yours out!” - I do pen palling and was letting someone know when I could send them a post card in exchange for the one I’m getting.

Cat or dog: Cat

Favorite pizza: White sauce pizza with chicken and feta cheese

Met a star: nope

Flown a helicopter: nada

Been on TV: nope

Broken my leg: nope

Seen a ghost: don’t believe in them.

Been sick in a taxi: nope

Seen someone die: no

SECTION NINE: Fifteen questions tag:

One ; it’s your birthday! what did you ask for?

Gift cards, um...(this is bad because my birthday is actually coming up) maybe some things from my Amazon list?

Two ; what was the last song / album you listened to?

WAP by Cardi B

Three ; what is your go to snack when you’re hungry?

Chocolate, cookies or cookies dipped in peanut butter

Four ; what is your morning routine?

Wake up, check messages on my phone while still in bed, get up, make coffee, maybe eat breakfast, drink coffee in bed, listen to music/watch videos or read on phone while drinking coffee, get dressed, brush teeth and skincare routine, make bed.

Five ; what mythical creature would you be?

An Elf? Or a Forest Witch. Something that has to do with the Earth and nature.

Six ; how do you interact with someone you don’t like?

I give short and straight to the point answers, if I’m working on something and they come up to me I’ll pointedly focus on that task instead of them.

Seven ; how do you define a toxic person?

Someone who lies, who makes you feel bad about the things that you do, that puts you done while lifting themselves, who is constantly bragging about their own things, who puts down others, who acts like they’re better, who acts like they’re way of life should be the only way of life.

Eight ; have you ever been to a concert or a fan-meet? if not, would you want to?

I have not, but I would like to one day because they seem fun and it would be nice to see a performance in person.

Nine ; do you believe in astrology? why or why not?

I do, mostly because it’s fun and interesting and I tend to find that I do a lot of the things and act like my zodiac sign without realizing it (aka I’m a Virgo).

Ten ; if you could have only one sense (hearing, touch, sight, etc.), which would you keep?

Hearing.

Eleven ; who is your favorite celebrity or idol?

At the moment, BM from Kard.

Twelve ; if you could talk to your favorite celebrity for a limited time, what would you tell them?

How do you keep going when it gets hard?

Thirteen ; I’m taking you out on a date. where are we going?

Maybe an art museum, or somewhere with flowers?

Fourteen ; do you prefer sweet or savory?

Sweet.

Fifteen ; do you have any Merch from any of your favorite artists?

I have several BTS albums and an EXO album.

I AM Tagging: @mygsii @myforeverforlife  @peonybane  @hobicomeholla29  @loser-dot-com @jeonsdear @namsjoon  @kpopcinnamonswirlroll @eashmo201 @1997jk @soulofatiny @cherryeoo​ @minniepetals​ @minniesmarshmallow​ @yoongi-sugaglider​  @crystaljins​ @taestfully​  @hyyunjins​ @i-am-delaney​ @worldwidebt7​ @flurrys-creativity​  @apurpledheart​ @holyfluffly​ @yunception​ @boymeetsweevil​ @chans-chair​ @brokecollegenerd​ @jinyoungsir​ @writersrealmbts​ @kpophoneybunny​ @actuallythatwaspromise​  @ladyartemesia​ @haylo4ever​ @ggukcangetit​ @kpopfanfictrash​ @wwilloww​ @jingabitch​ @kigurumu​ @jamaiskook​ @thatlongspringnight​ @ot7always-main​  @hauntedlilies​ @koophoriia​ @lorealchanelll​ @sweetheart--sannie​  @sweetae-tae​ @iniquitouspoppy​  

[shochmonster]

84 Questions

original: https://fuckyeahsurveys.tumblr.com/post/61049002526/84-questions

Put your music player of choice on shuffle and list the first 10 songs Guns of Brixton - The Clash Holiday in Cambodia - Dead Kennedys  Chainsaw - Nick Jonas California - Joni Mitchell Make It Wit Chu - Queens of the Stone Age This Woman’s Work - Kate Bush The Bad Thing - Arctic Monkeys Between the Bars - Eliot Smith Drown - The Smashing Pumpkins Different People - No Doubt

If you could spend a week anywhere in the world, where would it be and why? Would you take anyone with you? I’d take @duoloopo to the UK. I’d like to see places other than London.

What is your preferred writing implement? (eg. Blue pen, pencil, green pen)  I use my iPad stylus the most, but I have this heavy mechanical pencil I really like for drawing. 

Favourite month and why? October. I just love the fall vibe. 

Do you have connections to any celebrities (even minor)? List them. I went to undergraduate school with Rebecca Sugar. We used to ride the bus between NYC and DC together on holidays. 

Name 3 items you could pick up from where you are. Can of seltzer, pencil case, stack of bills

What brand logo is closest to you currently? REAL Skateboards

Do you ever play board games or other non-computer games? Got any favourites? I love Small World and Munchkin. 

A musical artist you love that isn’t well known Laura Stevenson and the Cans

A musical artist you love that is well known Red Hot Chili Peppers

What is your desktop background currently? Thomas Barrow on the beach in the Season 4 Christmas Special

Last person you talked to, and through what you talked to them @duomaxwell02 with my face :O 

First colour name you can think of that isn’t in the rainbow White

What timekeeping devices are in the room you are currently in? Two wall clocks, though one is very old and doesn’t wind anymore. I also have a clock @duoloopo ‘s dad made for me. It’s on the piano. 

What kind of headphones do you use? JBL Bluetooth, noise canceling 

What musical artists have you seen perform live? Foo Fighters (3x), Incubus (3x), Red Hot Chili Peppers, Smashing Pumpkins, Beastie Boys, Audioslave, Justin Timberlake, Troy Sivan, Arctic Monkeys, The Rolling Stones, Eric Clapton, Queen (but with Roger Daughtry, not Freddy... for obvious reasons.). Probably a whole bunch of others I’m blanking on. 

Does virginity matter to you? Not really. 

What gaming consoles do you or your family own? PS4, PS2, PS1, XBox 360, N64, Gamecube, Wii, NES, SNES, various Gameboys, Nintendo DS, PSP

What pets do you have? What are their names? Two cats, Hemingway and Renji

What’s the best job you’ve ever had? I like freelance art gigs the best. As for ‘normal people jobs’, I once was a sign painter for Whole Foods. That was pretty fun, minus the work drama. 

What’s the worst job you’ve ever had? Food service. 

What magazines do you read, if any? I’ll pick up Time once in a while

Inspiration behind your URL? My classic original URL was LinkWorshiper and had been since AIM first existed. I picked it because Zelda was the first fandom I ever joined. Now I’ve changed all my handles (except on AO3) to reflect my actual name, as my literary agent thinks it’s more professional. 

Inspiration behind your blog title? Mean Girls. I always chuckle imagining Thomas and Jimmy as some Edwardian version of the Plastics. 

Favourite item of clothing? My Downton livery waistcoat. And the stiff bosomed shirt and collars I have to go with it. 

Are you friends with any exes? Nah. By the time I felt comfortable enough to possibly try, I also didn’t care enough to. 

Name at least one book you loved as a child. His Dark Materials (the trilogy by Philip Pullman). I still love them and am jazzed that he’s writing more these days. 

What’s your native language? If that language has distinct regional variations, which variation? (eg. AU English, US English) US English, mostly a northeastern dialect/accent

What email service do you use? Gmail

Is there anything hanging on the walls of the room you are currently in? So much stuff. I have a mood board full of Downtons stuff over my desk, various DA posters and memorabilia, plus some artwork I’ve done, and some of my JC Leyendecker collection. The aforementioned wall clocks, a San Francisco cable car bell, Sailor Moon and a few other little knickknacks, like my hamsa. To name a few lol. 

What’s your favourite number, and why? 212 because it’s Manhattan’s area code and also because it used to be the notation for one of my favorite ships in an old fandom. 

Earliest moment in your life you can remember? Sitting under the table and looking at my grandma, who was wearing a Cruella Deville dress she’d knit herself. Like, it had the actual Disney character on it. Pretty cool to a little guy, I guess!

What did you have for dinner yesterday? Quesadilla 

How often do you brush your teeth? Whenever they feel gross

What’s your favourite candy/chocolate? Lately, I’ve been into Junior Mints. 

Have you had other blogs on Tumblr? Do you have any other blogs currently? This blog used to have my old handle, linkworshiper. I did a small Whole Foods blog when I worked with them, but it never went anywhere. 

If you were suddenly really hungry, what would you choose to eat? Sushi

What fandoms would you consider yourself a part of? Downton Abbey, though lately I’ve been crazy busy and not as active as I once was. Casually still poking at old fandoms like Zelda and Gundam Wing to name a few. 

If you could study anything, what would it be? More art education can’t hurt. Maybe some formal history education. 

Do you use anything on your lips? (eg. Chapstick, gloss, balm, lipstick) Chapstick 

How would you describe your sense of humour? Seinfeld 

What things annoy you more than anything else? Mouth noises

What kind of position are you in at the moment? Sitting

Do you wear much jewellery? Nope

Who is the leader of your country, currently? Any other levels of government with leaders? (State, region, province, county, district, municipality, etc) Three supposedly equal branches of government, currently being run into the ground by a clown 

Last 3 blogs on your dashboard, not including any of your own @halcyondaze @mab1905 @lavender-hued-melancholy

What do you carry your money in? I try to never carry cash, but I carry a small wallet 

Do you enjoy driving? Why or why not? I like it but sometimes it feels like a chore, especially during a commute. @duoloopo thinks I’m a shit driver so she tries to drive whenever she can, which has pluses and minuses. 

Longest drive you have ever been on? Savannah GA to San Francisco, CA in a UHaul

Furthest away from home you have ever been? Germany 

How many times have you moved house? God, I don’t even know. More than ten. 

What is on the floor of the room you’re currently in, not including furniture? Cat toys, unused canvases

How many devices do you own which can access the internet? Phone, computer, iPad, various game consoles 

Is there is anything that is guaranteed to always make you happy? Thomas and Jimmy <3 <3 

Is there anything that always makes you sad? Thinking too hard about being a failure

What programs do you currently have open? I just rebooted, so only Chrome, Spotify and Photoshop

What do you associate the colour red with? This line in the Kate Bush Song Blue Symphony, which goes, ‘I associate love with red, the color of my heart when she’s dead.’ 

Last strong smell you can remember smelling? The Greek food I ordered in for dinner

Last healthy thing you ate? Roasted veggies

Do you drink tea or coffee, and how much per day? I prefer tea, and I drink coffee for energy, though sometimes I think it just makes me crash harder. 

What do you associate the colour blue with? The sky

How long is the closest ruler you can find? 12 inches

What colour pants/skirt/etc are you currently wearing? Dark blue

When was the last time you drank water? About a minute ago

How often do you clear your browser history? Rarely

Do you believe nude photos can be artistic, rather than erotic? Yes

Ever written fanfiction for anything? Oh God, yes. You can still find it under Link Worshiper on AO3, though some of my ‘classics’ have been removed since I turned them into original manuscripts 

Last formal event you attended My cousin’s wedding

If you had to move your birthday to another date, which one would you choose and why? Maybe inch my birth year up just by two so that I’d stop being called a damn millennial. At my age, I really just don’t relate to the generation even though technicalities make me a part of it. 

Would you prefer to be at a beach or in the countryside? Beach

Roughly how many people live in your town? 52,000

Do you know anyone with the same birthday as you? Leonard Nimoy :D 

Favourite place to shop? Can be a certain store or a place where there are multiple stores I haven’t really gone shopping since the pandemic. Right now, it feels like the only place to buy anything is Amazon XD

Do you have a smartphone? What kind? If you don’t, do you want one? Samsung. It’s not a Galaxy but is a new model and a fraction of the price. 

What is your least favourite colour, and why? I don’t think I dislike any colors honestly. 

How do you spell grey/gray? Grey. I’ve got too many British online associates to ever go back. 

Go to your dashboard and describe the image shown in the radar section (below the “Find blogs” link) It’s Umbrella Academy fanart of Klaus. He’s in black and white with this hands over his eyes and the background is red. It’s very graphic. 

What difference is there between how many followers you have, and the number of blogs you follow? 736

How many posts do you have? 8,859

How many posts have you liked? I can’t find the stat D: 

Do you post mainly reblogs, or your own content? Mainly reblogs but I pepper in my own content when I can. Lately, I haven’t had time to do as much fanart though, and I kind of feel like it’s not worth bothering to post my original stuff. Nobody follows my blog for that. 

Do you track any tags? No. 

What time is it currently? 7:33 PM CMT

Is there anything you should be doing right now? Waking up @duoloopo. TIME TO JUMP ON THE BED. 

tagging, if they feel like it: @abbys-little-whippersnapper​ @bumblebarrow​ @irrationalgame​ @downtoncat​ @mab1905​ @duoloopo​

and everyone who I’ve forgotten

[theexleynatureblog]

Sorry, but letting your cat outside is a sign of a lazy owner.

Scientists estimate there is between 60million to 160million feral cats in the US. July, 2018.

“Bring in the dog and put out the cat!” - Yakety Yak. Letting our cats outside is almost a part of Western culture, since the days of Fred and Wilma. But we should all no by now that a cultural norm doesn’t make something automatically right.

At the end of every episode, Fred Flintstone let’s the family saber-toothed cat outside, only for the cat to jump back inside through the window and lock Fred out of the house.

Unfortunely, real-life cats aren’t as responsible. If you let your cat outside, and they are comfortable, they will take advantage of the opportunity. I know from experience living in a house with five outdoor-cats.

An article from Battersea.org gives instructions on how to safety introduce your cat to the outdoors, stating ‘your cat may want to explore.’

Well, of course they do! They’re a cat! It’s like telling a human they may want to walk. Here’s the thing: animals are high-wired to do what they want, not what they should. Because in the wild, the things they want is to find food and hunt, which helps them to survive. A captive cat doesn’t need to do that, but they’ll still have that interest in the outdoors and the high-energy associated with it.

The biggest arguments I hear for letting cats outside it ‘it’s their nature’, ‘they deserve freedom’, ‘they need the exercise/stimulation’. This is true. Cat’s are living animals who are designed to expend energy, just like us. Exercise is essential to a pet’s health, and as a pet owner, it’s your job to make sure they’re getting what they need. 

The problem is, if you’re doing this by letting your cat roam the neighborhood unsupervised, you’re doing it very wrong.

A cat wheel, recommended for owners of high-energy cats, like Bengals.

First, I’m before I list the many reasons to not let your cat outside, I’m going to list alternatives.

Number one - play

Did you buy a box of cat-toys for your new kitten? Did your new cat play with them a little bit and then loose interest playing by themselves? Purina recommends two 20minutes play sessions for your kitten every day. This time can change depending on your cat’s energy level. Obviously, a really active cat will need more, and an older cat may need less. You cant just dump a box of toys on the living room floor an expect your cat to keep itself busy all day like a toddler would, you have to engage with them!

Cat’s ‘play’ as an extension of their hunting instincts. They’re not doing it to pass the time, they’re doing it to learn and practice how to kill things. The key to productive play is thinking like prey. That long rope? Pretend it’s a snake. Grab that mouse toy and bounce it around in front of your cat like you think an actual mouse would move. Don’t poke or bonk your cats with they’re toys - its not encouraging their hunting instincts and may just make them annoyed and not want to play.

Aside from keeping them stimulated, playing with your cats every day can strengthen their bond to you. A happy and tired cat will have no interest in going outside. The amount of time you’d expect to play with/walk your dog is the same amount, maybe a little less, you should expect to spend on your cat. If you don’t have the time of day to take care of a dog, don’t get a cat.

Also, FYI, don’t use your hands as a toy, especially with kittens. A bad cat bite can put you in the hospital with a serious infection - even if your cat has lived indoors all it’s life. Using your hand to play instead of toys will teach kittens that your hand is in fact a toy. Good luck trying to pet them later.

Number Two - Cat furniture

Ever heard of puppy-proofing? Well, cat proofing is also a thing! If you want to take on the responsibility of owning a pet, be prepared to rearrange your entire house - and buy some new stuff. Cat’s are designed to climb and travel, so they may try to jump to to the tallest places in your house. Don’t want them up there? Consider getting a dog. Spray bottles and scolding may work, but unless you’re giving them an alternative to flex their muscles, it’ll only lead to behavioral problems down the road. 

Cat walks are a fun and safe way to let your cat have the run of the house. Not only will it be fun for them, but it’ll make them feel safer. If you cat feels trapped, it may hide a lot of the time. This is especially important if you bring another cat into the house. One cat acting scared may invite the other cat to attack. Cat-walks give your cat the advantage to ‘oversee their kingdom’, and escape a situation that makes them uncomfortable. 

But, I wouldn’t expect everyone to have this. If you rent your home, can’t afford this, or can’t build it yourself, it’s not an option. But you can be aware of how you arrange your furniture and shelves. If the cat’s gonna jump up on stuff, you might as well make sure it’s safe. 

The bare minimum cat furniture you need (besides a litter box) are scratching posts. Even a declawed cat will want one, because they’re not just shedding nails - they’re marking their territory.

Most predators have a way of marking territory to keep invaders away. Cats do too, with a host of special glands. One of those is called an interdigital (inter-digital) gland located - you guessed it - between their toes, or digits. In the wild, when cats scratch on trees, they are rubbing that scent gland on the bark, to warn other cats this is their territory. 

Your indoor cat probably won’t have to worry about invaders, but they will still want to use that gland. In their minds, your house is their territory that they must defend. This is why litter boxes are also important.

You may have seen pictures or videos of cats being trained to use and even flush toilets. It may be cute, but its actually not that great from a cat behavior standpoint. This article from The Dodo does a good job of explaining why NOT to potty-train your cat.

Don’t wanna deal with litter boxes? Get a dog! Because with cats, litter boxes are essential. Not only does it give your cat a place to do its business, but it allows them to exercise more of their natural behaviors. After all, ‘natural behaviors’ are the reason owners let their cats outside, right?

For every cat, there should be one litter box plus one extra. Two cats should have a total of 3 litter boxes, and so on. The boxes should be scooped once a day, with their litter changed about once a week - depending on specific needs. Sounds like a lot of work? Yeah - it is! Plus the smell of ammonia isn’t pleasant. If you don’t want to deal with this - Don’t. Get. A. Cat. 

Naturally, people look for short cuts, like training their cat to use the toilet, or letting them outside to do its business. Hey, it works for dogs, don’t it? Well - cats aren’t dogs. They have different behavior. While you can count on that fence keeping your dog in your yard, your cat is going to parkour over that like nothing. While dogs will go anywhere they feel comfortable, cats have an instinct to bury their feces. According to Live Science, this helps them hide from other predators. Cats can be eaten by anything bigger than them, and they know it. It’s a behavior that gives them security. Think about it like having a lock on the bathroom door - in a public place. Would you be brave enough to go without it? Personally, I’d hold it until I got home. Cats probably feel the same way, so they’re going to want to find substrate that’s easy to bury stuff in - fresh soil in a flower bed, or little Jimmy’s sandbox.

This is also why toilet-training is a bad idea. It’s not a natural behavior for cats, and it denies their instincts to bury their waste and mark their territory. Also, what happens when your cat gets elderly or injured, and they can’t jump onto the seat for a few days?

Your Cat can still enjoy the outdoors.

Did you know they make cat leashes? That’s right, you can allow your cat to transverse the yard and neighborhood in safety! The downside of this is cat’s don’t tend to be as excited about walks as dogs do. When I bought a harness and leash for my cat, they plopped on their side and refused to move. I never got to take him on a walk.

If your cat is similarly lazy, that doesn’t mean its impossible, it just means training will be required. With the right balance of motivation and knowledge, a pet can be trained to do anything physically possible. Yes, it’s consistent work and slow progress, but exactly the thing a good pet owner should be willing to do. If your cat is staring out the window and practically running out the door, then they might not even need training. With a lease, you can prevent your cat from killing small animals, keep them from climbing too high in a tree, and keep them out of the street and away from possibly dangerous animals.

On that note, now may be a good time to list the reasons why NOT to let your cat outside! (Warning, this next section may contain intense images of blood, violence, and dead animals. Reader discretion is advised).

Parasites.

Hold onto your stomachs, everyone! We are not taking the gentle road.

When I say parasites, I’m not just talking about fleas and ticks - very common and very overlooked. There are worse things out there. Toxoplasma, for one. This parasite that causes flu-like symptoms sheds from cat feces, and it can be much worse for pregnant mothers (this is why your doctor recommends not cleaning a litter-box while pregnant). To make matters worse, its one of the most common parasites in the world, spreading by - don’t throw up on me - fecal-oral contact, which is exactly what it sounds like. A cat can host the parasite without any symptoms and spread to humans, and that’s not the only one.

Outdoor cats are much more likely to get parasites and harmful bacterial. This is because they consume wild animals harboring parasites, and they can pick up stuff from the environment. A squirrel could defecate somewhere that a cat walks, and later licks themselves to clean. Boom! Infected. Now, your outdoor cat could spread stuff like toxoplasma to your neighbors! There’s your neighbor, working in their flower garden, unaware your cat used it for the bathroom (and buried it). Ope, now she’s whipping her nose with her unwashed hand! Boom! Infected.

Want to learn something really crazy? Cat parasites have made their way to aquatic mammals!

This National Geographic Article gives more information on how the ‘Kitty Litter’ parasite has made it to marine whales and dolphins. This is due to feral and stray cats defecating near waterways that eventually wash out to the ocean. While cats and some terrestrial mammals can host the parasites with out any major symptoms, marine mammals are very different. They are the incorrect hosts for these parasites, and anyone who’s studies parasites (like me) knows, parasites in the wrong host is a recipe for disaster. AKA, death. And like many other species, our marine mammals are going through enough troubles right now.

If you keep your cat inside and use a litter box, there is still a risk of infection, but you’ve significally lowered the potential spread. I say, anyone you takes the responsibility of cleaning a cat box is a hero. I mean that from the bottom of my heart. You are doing your cat and your neighborhood a huge favor. I sincerely thank you. So, when you’re scooping or changing litter, wear gloves, wear a mask, don’t touch your face, and wash your hands thoroughly afterword's. Also, take note of the condition of your cats dropping. Sometimes, to can clearly see worms, or something may just not look right. Remember - as an owner, it’s your responsibility to monitor your pets health. If you see something that doesn’t look right, you can take them to the vet. You can’t do this if you let your cat outside to do there business in the garden a few houses down.

High Death Rate

For feral cats, lifespan is typically two years. 50% of kittens don’t survive their first couple of days. Cats are killed by anything from car collisions, poison, coyotes, raccoons, raptor birds, and other cats. Male cats constantly fight each other for territory and access to females. 

This brings up an interesting question. If cat’s death rate is so high, how are there so many in every town? A couple reasons.

Cats have a lot of kittens - multiple litters within a year. Even if only 50% of those kittens survive, that’s a lot of cats that are ready to breed themselves not long after. 

Another reason is artificial healthcare. What this means is people will feed, spay/neuter, or rescue injured animals, and then release them. Because of their cuteness, cat’s have a charisma advantage over native predators in a neighborhood like coyotes and raccoons. No one’s going to trap a coyote with a broken leg to take it to the vet. I know that if I hit a cat with my car, and it was still alive, I would definitely rush it to emergency care. Supplemental feeding goes hand-in-hand with this. When people see a large cat colony outside, they may want to leave food out for them to help them out. Cats will eat the food, but it won’t end there. You may end up attracting more cats to an area, increasing the population. But if you were to suddenly stop feeding them, the extra cats are going to starve. You have only provided the animals with limited extra resources. Also, more cats in an area may lead to more fighting amongst them.

Because cats have a high death rate, the population’s method of survival is putting out high numbers. Feral and stray cats are constantly competing for food and running from dangers, and the ones who can put up with the suffering the most survive. This is the reality of nature. Nature is not a garden of Eden with fairies dancing with deer. This is the brutality you are exposing your pet cat to when you let them wonder alone outside. 

Cats Kill Stuff

Cats are one of the few animals that kill for fun. Its not that they’re sadistic - they’re instincts tell them to bat that thing that moves, and they’ll do it until the thing escapes or stops moving. People automatically think about birds and small mammals, but cats will also eat insects, amphibians, and reptiles.

Some people swear by this argument, and some people counter the argument by saying stuff like ‘yeah, but windows and windmills kill more birds!’. Really? That’s your argument? Can you imagine if we said that about serial killers? Oh, its not a big deal if Freddy killed a few woman, James over there has killed a lot more!

Like... okay, that’s not as bad, but... we should still do something about it.

Cats, windows, and windmills. Instead of looking at these as three separate problems that we can only solve one at a time, step back and look at the big picture. “Human-caused fatality.”  An article from the U.S. Fish and Wildlife Services talks about migratory bird fatality numbers and causes. You’ll see a handful of different causes, each with different solutions needed.

You can’t solve a problem by pointing your finger at someone and say “They’re doing it worse”. EVERYONE involved in the problem has to do their part and correct it. For example, window collisions with birds can be decreased by window stickers and ecologically-mindful building planning (not building tall things in high-traffic bird routes). 

These small, decorative stickers can help prevent bird-strike deaths.

Another angle to combat the problem is reducing industrial-caused mortality. Open oil pits are a hazard to migratory birds, who land in and ingest the oily water as they migrate. The Migratory Bird Treaty Act hold companies who do not cover their ponds accountable for ‘preventable fatalities’. However, the Trump Administration recently attempted to roll back regulations like these, in order to increase profit of oil and gas companies. Contacting politicians and being a thoughtful voter can prevent policies like these, and save birds and wildlife.

Of course, cat owners can put their foot forwards to help save wildlife life by keeping their pets inside or on a leash. People argue ‘cat’s are natural hunters. So what if they kill a few birds?’. Okay, well, first of all, if you look carefully at the stats, its clearly not just ‘a few birds’. Second, do you know what kinds of birds? No? I don’t either. In fact, we have no control what kind of bird/reptile/mammal your cat will kill. They kill whatever they can catch. This includes endangered species.

This website lists North America’s Endangered Animals. Notice that some of these animals are large mammals, like cougars. But most of the species are small animals that cats are capable of catching and killing. And cats don’t care if a species is endangered. Now, I’m confident that NONE of these species are threatened by cats alone. That’s not how nature works, it takes more than one factor to wipe out a species. Species like the Yellow-legged Mountain Frog are threatened by predation, disease, habitat fragmentation, and climate change (which can make diseases and parasite spread worse). A road through a wetland may not look like a big deal, but that may as well be a ocean for small amphibians and reptiles to cross.

Not only do these animals risk getting crushed by pedestrians and vehicles, but they have no cover from predators - and predators WILL exploit these places. Keep in mind, these animals can’t always just pack up and go - they need specific resources for food, shelter, and reproduction. Some turtles will nest in the gravel of a road because it provides the best substrate for digging a nest. This includes suburban areas - where your cats are waiting. When you add exotic animal predation pressure to a species already suffering from diseases and habitat loss, well - that’s how we lost the passenger pigeon.

In conclusion, please find ways to keep your cat healthy and happy without allowing them to roam unsupervised outside. There are programs that help remove feral colonies using live animal traps, but there are others, like places in Australia, that use lethal means. I don’t like the idea of killing cats. After all - they are adorable, and it’s not they’re fault they are there. That’s purely our fault for releasing out domestic cats into delicate ecosystems. As much as I love cats, I prioritize the health of our ecosystems and environment more, and that calls for removing large feral cat colonies. A few random barn cats of course is no problem, but the thousands of cats living in suburb yards needs to be reigned in. Whether it is done with live traps or kill traps is dependent on the people. One thing is for sure - if we don’t take responsibility for our exotic invasives, we will be paying for it for a long time in the future.

Sources

nola.com

American humane society

Caticles

US Fish and Wildlife Services

[myspaciousplace]

Home

Hi there, my name is Nicki and I have the privilege of raising four beautiful children with my amazing husband, Asif. We are a family on a journey, in the process of getting from where we are to where we want to be. Our story is rich, filled with both high triumphs and deep dark pits. I have known that we will write about this adventure “someday,” when we have arrived at the place of our dreams, when we have achieved our goals, when we are finally “there.” 

BUT, as time goes on, I am realizing that the powerful part of our story is the struggle, the loss, the hopelessness that we have experienced and still are trudging through at times. I once heard that when we tell our own story, no matter how raw or painful it may be, we then get to decide the ending, because we have taken ownership of it. Not telling our story makes us the victim of someone else’s narrative and keeps us stuck. With that in mind, I am choosing to write now, knowing that as a result, I will get to choose the ending. So here goes. . . 

First, I want to welcome you into our beautiful home, which I am so grateful for. I really want you to feel like a guest in my home, so please imagine you’re here as I describe it: 

My Dream Home

We live on 8 acres of land in a beautiful modern farmhouse with an open floor plan, 5 bedrooms, and 3 bathrooms. The sunlight streams in through our huge windows and we are far enough away from our neighbors that I don’t even have to close the curtains at night. My mostly white kitchen is spacious, with plenty of counter and cupboard space (gorgeous marble counters, to be specific), two ovens that I frequently bake in, and a large fridge filled with healthy food. Together as a family, we care for a flourishing garden, adorable miniature goats, chickens, barn cats and 4 dogs. I love every season in our home. The summers are spent mostly outdoors - in the pool swimming, on the deck grilling and eating, and in the backyard exploring. The fall is full of yard work and playing in leaf piles, followed with campfires in the evenings. The winter is cozy as we cuddle up in our living room by the fireplace and enjoy looking at the beautiful white world outside. And spring is spent planting our garden and cleaning up the yard in anticipation of the summer. We thoroughly enjoy taking care of our home and it is a bright, peaceful and joyful place. 

What I just described here is very, very real in my mind. In my imagination, I experience every nook and cranny of this home: I feel the warm grass under my feet when I’m outside in the summer; I smell the baking of Christmas cookies in my convection oven in December; I hear the joyful sounds of my kids running around, playing freely; I taste the large meal I’ve prepared for our family and the extended family that has come for dinner; and I see the bright, open living space, filled with the furniture and colors that I love: a bit of mid-century modern, mixed with a dash of farmhouse style, sprinkled with turquoise, green and yellow accents. This is My Spacious Place. This is my home.

Where We Really Live

However, if I were to tell you about where I actually live right now, it is indeed quite far from this vision, this dream. . . no, this PROMISE of a home I just described. 

Right now, our family of 6 with our 2 large, high-energy dogs, lives in a tiny, second-story, 1 bedroom apartment with no yard. And in fact, the 1 bedroom doesn’t even have a door on it. Nope, we’ve hung a curtain in the doorway of the room where our 4 children sleep every night. We have no real beds in this apartment, the kids roll out sleeping bag-type pads every night (except for the 2-year-old who is still in a crib) and Asif and I pull out part of our handy Ikea couch to transform it into a “bed.” This room is our “living room” by day and “bedroom” by night. 

Our tiny kitchen has less than 3 feet of real counter space (about 1.5 feet on either side of the sink) that we supplement with more Ikea furniture: 2 mismatched wooden islands against the wall. We eat meals at our small, 15-year-old kitchen table (also from Ikea!) and share one bathroom and a shower. We don’t even have a bath tub for our young kids. 

We have a room that used to be some sort of “porch” or maybe a 3-season room at the front of the apartment. It has no heat, but we need every bit of space we can get so we use an electric heater to heat this room in the winter and we endure the heat in the summer. We call it the playroom - it’s where the toys are and it’s also where I homeschool our 3 school-aged children. Thankfully, we have a large attic space where we can store stuff and I actually keep a majority of toys up there, rotating them occasionally to keep it interesting for everyone.

The kids clothes are kept in yet another piece of Ikea furniture, a cube-shaped bookshelf unit. Their clothes are in the boxes that fit into the cubes and that shelf is in the “living room.” Asif’s and my clothes are in a “closet,” that is actually just a section of the bathroom that we installed a couple of bars in for hanging clothes from. 

Walking On Eggshells

Additionally, we live above 2 businesses - one is our own business, Asif’s photography studio, and the other is an architect’s office who has been there for over a decade. He had a very bad relationship with the previous apartment tenant who was a woman with her older daughter and several small “yippie” dogs. She was too loud for him. She, the single woman with a daughter who was in school 5 days a week, who was probably often working herself, was too loud. 

And now we live here - we, who have 4 kids under the age of 10 who are pretty much home ALL day. We, who have a 2-year-old who jumps instead of walks to get around. We, a family who is naturally loud when we’re happy and mad, of which both emotions are expressed dozens of times daily between the 6 of us. We, who don’t have several yippie dogs but rather 2 big dogs who love to wrestle in the living room, right above the architect’s office and bark at passing dogs. And to someone working downstairs, apparently even a normal footstep quakes in such a way that whomever is listening can’t help but tense up and anything beyond that makes one think the ceiling is going to collapse. 

This man has clients come to his place of business and here we are, where our every-day life is causing him to appear unprofessional. He has banged on the ceiling and yelled multiple times to get our attention, Asif and he have had several tense discussions, and ultimately we know that we need to do whatever it takes to keep everyone quiet. But that’s not easy. So we block off half of our already small apartment every weekday during the architect’s work hours to keep anyone from even walking over the main part of his office. It’s helped keep the peace so far, but we are certainly “walking on eggshells” every. single. weekday. 

What a contrast from the dream home I described at first. Quite the opposite pictures. But do you know what’s crazy?? In the midst of this one-bedroom apartment living situation, I actually find the same peace, joy and brightness that I envision in the promised home that is to come. And believe it or not, I have come to see this as my spacious place. 

And what exactly that means, is another post. 

IMAGE CREDITS:

Philipp Reiner - Unsplash

Josh Hemsley - Unsplash

Kaleb Tapp - Unsplash

Kaluci - Unsplash

Rex Pickar - Unsplash

Kristina Flour - Unsplash

[zebraslovescupcakestoo]

Join me for Coffee sometimes.

I am sitting at a Mexican restaurant called 'Mexicali's' today for a change and in favor of my friend who decided to take a rare chance to do something different. It's not everyday we decided to do something different, mostly my 'older' friend, due to the fact that we loved the peaceful moments of not dealing with the criminals and the mafias at the moment.

I am a bit embarrassed on the establishment with the clean, colorful settings and I'm just in my normal wear. It's not 'first class fancy,' but it's a really nice restaurant to go out. The owners were a Latino family that immigrated years back, worked REALLY hard to get the place and they proudly officially opened for business!

Of course, there was an issue with the process of buying the property. It's not the seller, the building or even the price. But it was the other 'buyer' who wanted to have the location to opened up another Italian restaurant.

I have NOTHING against Italian food, I do like them and knew quite a few so Kitty can take a break once or twice a night. I'm not sexist. It's just there's already five in Chicago already and I wanted to have something different other than pastas and pizzas! Back to this story, their competitors were not happy with them moving in with their food cultures and other stuff that I found really unfair and SO UNCALLED for! Just to say the least...

It wasn't long that the police, which my team was still part of, got a tip and some accusations of them depicted as 'criminals' and then some just so that it would be harder for them and easier for their 'rivals' to acquire it smoothly. I think it was a bit of a misunderstandings while most think it's 'legitimate' and I wasn't the only one. Sam thinks it's too and he also recognized the other 'buyer's' name!

He's only known in public image as an owner of all the Italian Restaurants but like Bendy behind that mask, he's also a Mafia boss that's in alliance with the Alfonso's! He told me that they're on neutral terms, but they're on thin ice with their relations lately...

So long story short, I did my investigations, uncovered what's real, what's not, uncovered the other mafia's secrets and then once we've hit the court room stage, it's final verdict was now in the press.

Italian Mob boss Arrested! Mexican family not guilty!

I had to admit that we almost lost at the end until that last detail that the 'witness' had slipped had caught mine and then Sam's attention.

It was tiring that almost all of our defense cases were close calls, but until Sheba is back with her full confidence, Sam is playing both hand decks and it's gotta be really hard in my point of view. Even if both of them are pretty good, it's almost hard to look at every evidence, rules, laws, and so on. It feels like I'm just doing the 'easy' portion of the trials...

Unless you're not in good shape and fighting against an Olympic Lunatic that runs the Underworld of Chicago.

I then noticed a child's voice at another table with what I assumed a mother with her son. They were having their little quality time together with her holding the menu card and her assumed son drawing something that looks like a dinosaur. She smiled and she patted his head as to say 'good job.'

I smiled sadly at that. It reminded me of my sister if she was still alive today. She would be a great mother like she was to me when I was growing up at that age. I never knew my mother and my father was barely at home but he raised us properly. It's frustrating that she would never had the chance to play with the twins, praised their abilities and watch them grow up...

But now I had to take over for her and for my father too. I knew that my uncles and the relatives insisted that they can do it, I still declined and wanted them to be raised here because of the whole new continents and the cultures they're not used to where they're at.

Despite the hardships, I finally did do a decent job so far, with some bumps but I think we're good for now. They even trusted me more than ever...

Speaking of trust... I then remembered my friend who had yet to show up. I then got a word from the waitress that they had a phone call from him saying that he will be a few minutes late. I nodded and said I can still wait.

I then look out the window to daydream a bit to kill time... I noticed a bust from a shop across the street that reminded that first case that I worked as an official detective, two years ago...

---Time travelling on a rainbow, Nyan Cat!----

It was supposed to be here, right? I thought as I examined the attached, block buildings from the sidewalk. They all said that this was an 'average' neighborhood, but this is like for the 'well-do' class like a doctor or a lawyer. I needed to find my lawyer for three reasons.

One: He helped me narrow down the six busts of Anubis in a 'vandalized' bizarre case and uncovered the missing Pharaoh’s Pearl that got stolen from a museum.

Two: I was saved from Bendy and Boris when I found out that this was one of their quick money schemes by a tall, dark mysterious black suited and mask man, They were taken down by his throw downs and my quick thinking with Bendy when he almost got him.

Three: he dropped his wallet without noticing when he disappeared... and I found out just who he was.

Which leads me to the next three things: I want answers!

I then head someone disputing a few houses down the streets and I saw the man I was looking for, smirking and walking with his Border Collie dog. I think that beautiful canine might be potentially deadly when she saw me and then ran at me with it's sharp teeth.

Border Collies are known for being territorial and very loyal to it's owner asides it's history of being an ideal 'sheep dog.'

I stood very still with my hand sticking out to halt him or her, I don't know it's gender yet, just to show I'm not here to pick a fight or murdering anyone.

But then to my surprise, he/she then started to slow down and got less aggressive as he/she sniffed my hand. Then like any other 'vicious' guard dogs that I've encountered, he/she licked it and was friendly again. It was an odd thing that I'm a 'cat' person yet for some odd reason, dogs liked me.

“That's a first, she never done THAT before. Most people would be running from aggressive, territorial dogs and Tiara wouldn't be this friendly to first time strangers at our home.” My expected 'suspect' said with a confused look once he caught up.

So the dog's a girl and she's very pretty. Kinda what you expect when someone's probably have a much bigger income than I currently have. “Hi, I'm the guy that was from that coffee shop a few-”

“Yeah, you're that new kid detective that came for the sales record papers. Did you need anything else?” He asked as he and his dog walked up to their home. I needed to have my answers from that night, but I needed to be careful because the way he took out both of them, it's insane! Boris has super muscles, Bendy has demon speed but this guy, despite his tall and lean look, is not to be underestimated! I think it's one of those Eastern boxing techniques and something with wind elements...

But none the less, I still want to know. I took out his wallet. “I found this and I believed that's yours. Everything is still in there.” He swiped is so quickly and that's when I knew I found my smoking gun.

“Thanks for returning it and not going on a shopping spree. Tell your parents they did a good job raising ya!” He was about to close his door shut until I instinctively had to say something, grab it quick and force it opened. Only ended up him whacked his forehead on the top door's frame, said something like 'tavern nackle' and then falls flat on the pavement. His dog barked and sniffed at this head.

Great! I made a new fried who's gonna sue me for aggravated assault after my first case!

Upon his looks at me like I just pissed him off, the only expression I made as horrified and I blabbed out. “I'm so sorry! I didn't-” He then halted me in gesture and got up. “Save it! My door frames alone already told me I'm too tall and this is not the first time sh!t like this happens.” He wrinkled his nose and gently rubs it.

“Listen, I need to talk you... inside. It's about that case and... other stuff I've uncovered. I know how and where that wallet came from.” I tried to convince him and I wanted to settle this peacefully. He stared me down like he was suspicious of me and then he sighed. “You don't seems like you're gonna blab it out to everyone...” I immediately shook my head in his agreement. I may be doing my job in the name of justice, but I wanted to do it the right way.

“I wouldn't without solid proof and well... you did helped. Twice. Was it because you wanted to help others? Or was is a promise you made for some one like me? Or any reason why you became an attorney?” I was asking so many questions until I noticed some sadness in his glaring stare... Have I said something I shouldn't have?

He then sighed and all that tension from glaring disappeared.“Kid, come in. It's a long story.” He tilted his head to gesture 'get in there.' Normally, I would get bad vibes from suspicious characters, but this guy despite a potential suspect, didn't seem like he was a bad guy... at first.

We got inside and I was... quite surprised. It was so simple yet the furniture reminded me of the 20's styled in great condition. I noticed some book shelves with many well, books, and then some old family photos, some medals, more photos in air gears, some items displayed like monuments and what stood out to me the most was that one, huge piece that was leaning aside from the large book shelves. It was a beat up piece of a propeller.

“May I ask what's with this um... fascinating piece you got leaning?” I politely asked as I sat down on the big couch. He was searching in the drawers for something. “Yeah, that was part of that one plane that I used to fly in the European war about a decade back.”

European war about a decade back? Isn't that...? “You fought in the WWII war?” My eyes gleamed to a hero of that infamous war! Sure the Americans joined in two years later in that and I do respect them too, but this is... amazing that I met someone had fought, survived and live to tell the tale.

“T'che! Who do you think I was doing almost ten years ago? The 'Coco’ Chanel and mess around the Nazi spies?” He said it like he doesn't care about it and cuts my 'hopeful' feelings in half. I wasn't asking disrespectfully on purpose... He was kinda rude.

“I joined in the air force as a 'delivery boy' for carrying supplies and other sh!t I had to do. After a few years when times got rough, I was 'promoted' to join the fights in the air. I wasn't perfect but at least I get the job done.” I was thinking about while I was at that age at the time. I was doing my homework while he was up in the air fighting off the most evil people in the 20th century. I am so far behind his level...

“I did had my fair share of working with people who we all had a common goal. The British, the French resistance, the 'neutral' Swiss. Not the cheese one. We ALL wanted to end the Nazi regime and stop their 'Aryan race' ideology or else 3/4 of the world would not survive up to this day.” He lay down his old book full of photographs and I was looking through all of his photo shots with his groups and others who had joined the cause. Most of them was taken with one or two 'similar' person... I didn't had to ask why he was with so many different people he worked with cause I knew that there was so many lives were lost in that war. Even if some DID lived to tell the tale, I think he would bother to tell me upon first impressions...

“At that time, I only wanted one thing the most from my partners. Loyalty. They can cuss, b!tched out anything, vomit only the outside of the plane because of air sickness, but if they back-stabbed me in the name of the swastika or anything, I ain't afraid to cut them out cold.” Schhk!

I heard like something like a sword unsheathed and I saw something sharp from his right sleeves. It was a knife! “This is me being 'nice' since you seem like the type that doesn't run it's mouth at every little thing. I'm just be as 'polite' as I can but if you double-cross me, I'll send you to the morgue faster than a paycheck spend in a day.”

Now he's threatening me if I tried to turn him in! But I then 'see' something he's holding back. Not the 'other' weapon in another arm, but something about the past in silhouettes behind him... like a woman with another man... and then I saw a small window vision like someone's vision was fading and saw a person with a parachute opened...

I knew that I had yet to ask this, but by hearing this, getting to know his 'present' character, saw a few family photos and 'saw' something hidden...

“Sam... did something happened that made you lose your trust in people?” He gasped with wide eyes opened. I'm now scared of my own safety and what's gonna happened to my family... But I needed to know why.

“I-Im not gonna say what is right or wrong. I can't judge what you might have done or reacted to what happened that made you suspicious towards people. But I want to understand how and why you're acting distance to so many people. I've only saw you twice after that very first meeting and you look like you could have murdered someone if you wanted.”

He then rested his face beck to it's neutral self. “If you're gonna say that 'what if I say I'm like that?' I would ask why did you help me not once, but twice to save my life? I know you're not as bad as those other attorneys says about you when I asked where were you all this time.” I sat very still to wait for his reaction. Is he gonna throw me out in the streets? Yell at me for spouting non-sense? Or is he gonna do anything at all?

He sighed and then started to explain. “Kid, I'll tell you a little something that I learned the hard way when I was around your age. Sit down for a while. It's a bit of a long story so make yourself comfortable.” He sat down comfortably as I was too. “Back in my high school years, I used to date this girl that I liked and I really thought that we really love each other. A real, mushy, teenage love story I used to have. Her name was Nell but we all called her Nelly. I had that dream one day after college once and made enough as a prosecutor, I would ask that 'big question' for her hand in marriage. I also have a twin brother, Simon, who's a Mountie. That's what you might called the Canadian police in that country. He's that eternal Optimistic, yuppy-peace talk, tree hugging, good  manner, good nature conscious @$$hole since we were born. Think of it as polar opposites of our characteristics that 'compliments' each other, OK?”

My eyes 'senses' indicated that on his left hand that he doesn't have the ring...

“Did she refused or something happened to her?”

He shook his head. “Nah... I found out that her feelings and mine weren't the same... Like a knife through the chest, I caught her and my twin brother together alone behind the barn that we used to own. It was after my last part time shift I've done for my college preparations. I even heard their whole conversations and I found out the truth that I was 'really' not happy with. She and my brother were in love. She did admitted that she does like me but... more like a friend and that those times we went to date was so that she doesn't upset me... Wanna guess how my 'feelings' went out the window faster than throwing out cold coffee back then?” He then got up a bit and reached over the shelves to grab a photo frame. “That's when I interrupted their little rendez-vous and I immediately said a lot of sh!t about what I've heard and my thought. I even finished throwing a punch at my twin's face, not caring that I probably broke his nose and then I left for colleague in Montréal. Since then, I dedicated my whole time for my licenced bar and I ignored any letters from home. I was still angry at them and I even discarded their wedding invitation. You can guess how my parents were furious when I said I couldn't come when I came up an excuse... I avoided their supposed 'reunion', both them and the newly weds, when I decided to take a hold in my education and joined the air force for WW2 as a 'delivery boy.'” He places the photo frame face down next to the night table where he is.

“Were you really... so upset about finding out the truth of her that you avoided any contacts with her and even your own family?” I had moments that I wanted to avoid at all cost, but I knew better now that I can't run from my problems cause it's never gonna solve anything but delaying.

“It's not that I was afraid, I just didn't want to deal with them after that.” That still means you're afraid of facing them when you acted out that night. “Anyways, I was then drafted to the air strips, learned how to fly those flying death machines and minded my own business in the war. I delivered the supplies and goods for the army and occasionally for old England when their times were tough about short supplies coming in and out. I have plenty of war stories that would go on and on, but I'll save it for another rainy day.”

I admit that I wanted to hear them, but I decided to respect that so we can continue his story. “As much as there was so many sh!t storms we've got ourselves into, I admit that I did found a new family, if you'd call it that. Random strangers you'd probably never met once before-” He got up and took another photo frame from the shelves, this time it was a group of people in their flight jackets. I can tell that one of them was the younger version of him that's about my age and he looked like he was having a great time with that bright smile. “-but it was close enough.”

He then proceeded to tell me each of them and then once he finished, he said. “We could all been having a good life by now...”

He then violently slammed the photo frame on the coffee table in between us and I heard something cracked. “IF IT WASN'T FOR THAT OSTIE-CRISS-DE-PIECE-D'HUMAIN-MARDE PAUL HAVEN'T PULLED A SUICIDE MISSION AND IF I WAS SMART FOR FIVE BUCKS...” He took a deep breath to calm him down when he noticed that I curled myself into a ball on my seat with eyes wide opened. He cleared his throat and continued. “Well... me and the others were completely clueless when we found out. It was a few months near the end game, 'V-Day' as they called it. We were supposed to transport some goods to the allied soldiers from Egypt to Italy. There was some sort of malfunction problems with most of the planes except for that big one... We didn't have much choice but all four of us embarked it cause some supplies were a bit heavy or many. At that time I, well, 'we' all thought that it would be fine since it was all five of us in one flying tank. It was about in the middle of the Mediterranean Sea when it started. Paul said he might have notice something in the cargo, so he and Cameron, who he volunteered to come along, tagged along while Jesse and myself were just relaxing. I wished that I would have taken his place instead, but I wasn't aware. We both heard a gun shot and Cameron's last cry. I got up and ran at the back with Jesse not far behind. When I opened the door, I was immediately hit from the bullet in the chest. Then I was knocked out... for a few minutes until my blurry vision came and I felt like we were falling vertically. Last I saw before I blacked out again, was Paul opening the emergency door with his parachute.”

My heart sank a whole lot when I heard that. Not only he was betrayed once, but twice! How can anyone abuse such a strong person like him despite some flaws? And why did that Paul guy back stabbed them and almost killed all his crew mates? Did he still believed that the 'Evil' teams were still winning if he does this?

“I barely remembered what exactly happened after that, but they told me from some account that I was found among the remains of our plane by some shipmates from Egypt. I woke up in that country's hospital when they told me that and I was pretty much feel empty on the inside again. It was my second time that I was betrayed by someone that I trusted and I almost completely swore myself never to trust or have another friend as long as I lived. Well... until someone had to change my mind.” I tilted my head to know who.

“During those days that I was bed bound in that make shift hospital, the last person that I wanted to see or even hear from was my twin, Simon. He somewhat learned about me being here and all that jazz, so he came here on his own while Nelly, his wife and my 'ex', was waiting back home... with their kids that I soon learned that I'm an uncle but I had no idea because I cut my ties with them since then. I was too angry from that night.”

He's an uncle like me! My eyes sparkled with joy. “I was even in big surprise that they had triplets.” I almost choked. Triplets?! I had enough trouble with twins but triplets? Oy yoy yoy! “You've got more on your plate than I do!” I said to that.

“Well, they're THEIR kids so I'm just a 'support' guardian so it's not THAT big of a deal for me. Back on topic, I was still not talking to him when he came and started to cry and apologized. I would have throw him out with a throwing technique, but in my condition back then, all I could do at the moment was lie on my back. I was annoyed that he still keep talking and was still insisted that he's gonna change my mind.”

I tiled my head. “And... what happened next?”

“Well, at first I wasn't gonna listen, but when you're bed bound from injuries, boredom would be almost intolerable and well... he DID kinda risk himself and spared his time to see me despite what happened so... I just listened. Turns out that when he and Nelly met the first time, it wasn't love at the start, but then when we started to date more, I wasn't aware that Nelly didn't like me as much as she wanted and that I wasn't exactly right for her. Unlike my twin, I was more serious, smart@$$-ery, indoor guy yet clever, a bit 'too honest' for my own good and I was more 'pessimistic' realistic sometimes. She's not saying that I was a 'bad guy' but I'm just well... wasn't just right for her. Let's just say.”

“So... she wanted to be with your brother instead cause he's more positive and much more... er... NOT that I'm saying you're bad either just well-”

“You don't need to beat around the bush. I preferred to be honest and tell the truth, even if it's hard and it might piss off people sometimes. That may not get many friends, but it will get the right ones. I will admit that I may come across rude sometimes, but I don't like to hide from the truth. Think of it as makeups: You can cover it up for the moment, but sooner or later, your true face will be revealed.”

“I remembered you saying something like that from that coffee shop. I do like honesty in people, but maybe if you try to explain to them in a nicer way, at least they'll respect you AND know you're much nicer than you look.” I know that he's an adult and that he's capable of making his own decisions, but sometimes it's alright to take some advice once in a while.

“I'll keep that in mind. After that was explained, he then told me what I had missed for almost eight years. You know the usual: weddings, babies, stupid parent hood stories with their kids, and how they're all looked like me for somewhat reasons. I didn't done it.”

I gasped. “My nephews look almost like me too!” He raised an eye brow with astonishment. “Seriously? What are the odds?”

“I'd love to tell more, but I still wanted to hear the rest of your story. What happened after you two talked?” I didn't meant to derailed his story, but it was really nice that I found someone who understands being an uncle/parent.

He then resumed. “Like I've said, it was hard, but after a while, I then started to think of all that happened from that time and then I realized of how I was wrong of thinking about the whole thing. I was furious when I found out about them, I was neglectful of all the letters they've send me for returning and for forgiveness apart for some family news, and how my only brother that still cared for me despite of all those years that I wasn't. Like I've said about him, he's a dummy goodie two-shoes, but he's got his heart in the right place. Then it's was time that I started to admit that I was wrong and that I was the one to apologize instead. I also told him that I would have turned back to that night so that we could have ended it more peacefully instead of tears.”

Then the Collie, Tiara, stared to whine with her dog bowl in her mouth once we turned to the direction of the sound. “Ah, tabarnak. Désolé, Tiara. J'ai completement oublié. I'll get your water.” His bilingual accent is really captivating and interesting. He got up from his seat and I did too to follow them in the kitchen. “Ah yes, did I forgot to mentioned that Tiara also came from Egypt, despite being a Border Collie and she was rescued from cross fires with the locals and the remaining Nazis that were hiding there?”

Another amazement! “No. Way-!?” I then 'sensed' something hidden in the kitchen. Oh no, not now! I just got on good terms with him and now it wants me to 'show' me something?

I did my best to ignore it and hoped that I would have a break from 'it.' But unfortunately, I haven't learned my lessons about my 'abilities.' No matter how many times I tried, it will be persistent and will be 'forceful.' My body then moved to move against my will and I was then staring at that one picture with two birds. One with a toucan and a flamingo. My 'sights' then showed me that there were some papers and items that seems like evidences in some sort of a safe box.

Is my sight telling me that he's hiding something important? Like, was he hiding crucial evidence for something? Blackmailing? Anything?

He then said to me. “What were you looking at?” I got surprised. So I had to make an excuse. “I-I was just wondering about this art. It's very tropical! I really like this! You have great taste with this painting!” I did my best to avert my real reason. Sam however, noticed that I was hiding something.

“Really? Just the picture? Do you ever wondered if there was something hiding behind? Like one of them detective gut feeling?” He looked at me like I haven't said something important. I tried to joked. “Ha! Good one! Like the ones in Noir movies if you're rich enough.”

“True, like I’m hiding some important documents from a case I'm currently working on.” He suggested.

“Yeah... Or maybe some important evidence small enough?” I 'innocently' said while I scratched my back.

“Or maybe say... a small, wooden box?” He then suggested. “Mmmm... maybe if it's small enough, yes it would be a possibility.” I said with my eyes glued to the floor.

I then felt a tap on my head and I looked up to a pair of staring eyes. “Or maybe someone's not being completely honest about what he said. Did you know I have a 'knack' of finding out the truth in a bizarre way?” He crossed his arms and was expecting me to tell him what I know. After hearing his story, I can't blame him for suspecting treason for the third time

I then felt terrified in a long time. What am I supposed to say? I have 'super vision powers' to see the truth and secrets, please spare me? I begged him. “Please Mr. Toucan! I don't want to cause any trouble! I know you're not a bad person, but I really can't say what I know! I'm the only person that my own nephews can trust after-ah!” Then Tiara plopped on me like she wanted to lick my face. I then started to giggle a bit until she had snatched something VERY important and irreplaceable!

It was my special necklace... My mom's and my sister's special necklace!

“Give that back, Tiara!” I tried to get it back, but she was quicker and she handed it to Sam. “Please! Don't break it or take it away! It's very important to me!” I was scared and I was almost into tears.

He noticed my appearance and he softened a bit. “Easy. I'm not that type of person to pick someone like you. I just wanted to know the truth.” He said.

I didn't know that I was being too scared over this, but what I needed right now was that necklace. “I... I know what you wanted, but please! I don't want to be send to a mental hospital! My nephews are my only family left and vice versa! They can't go my relatives over seas right now! They're too young to understand-”

He then clamped my mouth. “Whoa!Whoa!Whoa! Slow down! I never said I was gonna turn you in. I'm asking how you knew something about that portrait I kept it a secret.” He tries to calm me.

I shook a bit but I was a bit relieved. He decided to hand over my necklace and I held it very close. “I... Thank you. I'm sorry... I've... had this ever since my sister gave it to me when I was fifteen. She told me that it used to belong to my mother that I never knew and that she told me that it was rightfully mine. Although, I never understood why, but it feels very special to me.”

“You've also mentioned about nephews and being the only one. Care to share that story?” He asked. Well... I decided to tell him about it.

After a while... I explained on my sister and my father's demise and my relatives.

“I see. So you're almost a single parent, but you could have asked one of your relatives to help out. I'm pretty sure they'll be more than happy to see them more often.” He asked as he handed over a cup of hot milk.

“Thanks. I know that they even insisted, but the thing is, I'm not sure that Inky or Winky are ready or mature enough to live with them. They ARE my sister's. They're nice but sometimes a bit of trouble makers. I'm afraid that they'll be spoiled or they'll give more hard time for them when they're supposed to be enjoying their golden years after raising kids.” I explained.

“I'm pretty sure that they wanted you to have some freedom at your age. Lots of guys wanted to have freedom. I was no exception despite some circumstances.” Sam said.

“I know what you meant, but I made a promise to my sister that I will be there for them. Luckily for me, they all understood and they said that they'll be there if I needed them. I was told by some that I'm so much more mature than my 'look a like' cousin... Which is a story for another time...” I scratched my head and took a sip.

“I can wait for that. However, I still wanted to know what's the deal earlier before you panicked. I'm not going to turn you in, I just... had a 'knacking' feeling you were hiding something.”

I gulped at that. Is it really alright with me telling him? Even if we've met 'officially' the second time?

“I... would you believe that I have a 'talent' that can see things... hidden and... other things?” I shookly spoke. That's it. I'm done for.

He then patted on my head like a kid brother. “Hey. You weren't lying. So I believe you.”

I opened my eyes wide open to him. See if he was lying, but he wasn't. “You... believed me? Just like that?”

“You want to know how I knew and why I do?” He then pointed at his nose. “Remember that part about that plane accident? My nose had somewhat started to act funny when people lie or hiding something. Not for sneezing, but more like irritating and it makes me pissed. Depending on who they are and my mood, my manners are from one to f#ck you. Just a penny for thoughts if I ever done that to you. I've been through a lot and now I barely give a damn now a days.”

Apart that last piece he can detect lies with his nose? Huh! Guess we're not so different at all.

“Say, Sam. Have you ever made new friends here since you've moved?” I asked.

“Most of the people at the court house are a bunch of Willy Wonkas and think they can please and sugar coat everyone and everything. I only dropped in their conversations if sh!t hits the fans when they screw up big time.”

Guess I have much work to do with him.

----- Woken up from cloud 7-----

“Hey! Sleepy head! Wake up! He's almost here!” The voice of Kitty had woken me up. I saw her and my nephews all excited. “Huh? Wha?”

“Uncle! It's Uncle Sam's birthday! Remember?” Inky shouted. “And his family is coming over from Canada! You told us, remember?” Winky in turn shouted.

“Boys! This is a restaurant! Use your inside voices.” I shushed them. “And no, didn't forget.”

Truth is, the reason why we decided to hold it here was today, is in fact, Sam Toucan's birthday. The only thing Sam doesn't know is that this is a surprise party. I then noticed Sam's car coming. “Hey, Felix! Over here! Before they see you!” I noticed Sheba's shouting from the other side of the room, where it was reserved and I was like 'I'm trying to teach these kids a lesson and you just broke the concept' look.

I was then dragged by the twins who followed Kitty into the reserved area, where it's like a private room, but thankfully for us we can see better in the dark and who else is there.

“Alright, is everyone ready? I see them coming.” Sheba notified us from behind the curtains.

I heard the others giggling a bit and some of us hushed as we heard Sam, Woody and Matteo coming up closer. They told him to duck his head before he hits that door frame. Thank God they did or  else he's gonna use words that aren't meant for children in any language.

As soon as they turned on the lights, we all shouted “SURPRISE!!!” All of us and also included, Sam's family from Canada which includes his faulty twin brother, Simmon, his wife *Ahem and ex-girlfriend, Ahem* Nelly, and his three nephews that looks a lot like him, Puey, Susey, and Louis. These three teenagers were identified by their colored scarfs of their scout uniforms, thankfully.

Sam chuckled with a rare happy feeling. “Well isn't this a nice surprise for a change.” I felt much happier than him, even if I would never admit it.

From back to that coffee shop where we first met, the stories he would tell, the patience I had to use whenever he was brutally honest, gaining his trusts little by little and then once the big pay off came, he did got better.

I'm not saying he's perfect, but he is-

“Felix, is that your name?” I was asked by Sam's little twin brother. “Huh? Yes, it is.” I said.

He talked to me while everyone was busy with Sam“I know this is a special day for both my twin and myself, but I wanted to thank you and your family to have a very memorable moment since we were younger. You've given him a very valuable gift that no money can buy.”

“I doubt it. All I did was being his friend.” It's not like I've turned to Batman and saved Gotham city at night. (At least not while I'm taking care of kids at the moment.)

“You gave him a reason to trust people. He barely did so when he came back from war. Sure, we all forgive each other, but he seems like he was, distant, from other people. Not to mentioned being cynical most of the time.”

“Yes. I know.” Being realistic and logical was one thing, but bitter and distrustful was another.

“I just wanted to know that if ever you need help, my brother and yours truly as a Royal Canadian Mountie, are available at anytime.” He placed his hands on my shoulder. “Thanks. I'll keep that in mind.” I thanked him.

I looked at Sam again to see that he's still having a great time. I looked at all of us to see that our 'family' had grown much larger since last time.

We might not be related, but we all care for each other and we all accept each other. Flaws and all.

And one day, we can be a one, big, happy, family.

----THE END----

Ahhhh..... I’m slugish and finally finished my OC’s humanized Sam Toucan’s backstory. 

As I’ve implied, he does have a faulty twin brother, Simmon. To help you understand him, he’s the Dudley do-right version.

I wanted to give him an opposite personalities, like ying and yang but they compliment each other.

Now for the wifey, I decided to choose Dudley’s sweat heart version too.

As for kids well, if you watched the froot loop’s commercials from more than two decades, he does in fact, have THREE nephews with the unofficial canon names in this story.

Now for this part of the story, I wanted to utilize the days from the Zodiac signs, the astrology one, to describe his character.

Which is also known as a Scorpio. 🦂♏ Like me!

And news flash for any Felix the cat and Mickey Mouse cartoon fans: Their Birthdays are under the Scorpio dates!!!!!

And to finish off, I wanted to write about how Felix and Sam’s friendship had been formed and evolves over time. So you can think it’s like Bendy and Boris but more on a friendship level than ‘Bromance’ or ‘BL’ level.

Sam is straight, end of story.

BBTIM AU and humanized characters belongs to Marini4. OCs like humanized Sam Toucan, Woody McPecker and Matteo belongs to me.

[catherinesnyder]

41 cute logos that are totally aww-some

You’re scrolling through Instagram and you pause to look at a new pic of your friend’s baby. You decide to run down the workday clock looking at gifs of baby elephants on Reddit. Why? Because they’re cute. And because you’re a human, you love cute things. Cute things—like babies—automatically jump to the front of our mental queues because this ensures their survival. But our sense of cuteness doesn’t just cover babies of our own species, or even just sentient beings. We love all things cute, whether that’s cute animals, cute drawings or even cute objects because they grab onto our brains and demand that we pay attention to them.

A cute logo instantly grabs your attention and makes you go ‘aww’. Logo design by 3AM3I.

So how do you get your logo to demand attention? Make it cute. Cute might be the norm for your field or you might be the first one to try it. Using a cute logo in an industry that typically doesn’t use cute logos can be a way to set yourself apart or to target a demographic that industry doesn’t usually target.

Keep in mind that you can take cute too far. In most industries, opting for a cute logo means giving up some of your position as an authority in your industry. Notable exceptions are industries that literally run on cute, like baby products. But if you’re going cute to advertise a line of office furniture or gardening items, there is absolutely such a thing as too cute. Recognizing too cute is a know-it-when-you-see-it kind of situation that happens when a cute image undermines the product it’s representing.

Take a look at these different ways to do cute logos. Cute can be somewhat subjective, but because our sense of cuteness is rooted in psychology, it’s not as purely subjective as our senses of what’s cool or what’s beautiful. You can use elements that trigger our cute senses to build a cute logo, and here’s a few ways to do it:

Cute n’ cuddly logos —

We all love cute animals. Otherwise, they wouldn’t make up most of the internet. As a species, there are few things we love as universally as other animals… especially baby animals. We love imagining what animals think about and giving them voices to speak their minds. If we didn’t, talking animal movies wouldn’t be some of the highest grossing films we create.

We love our pets. We love wild animals. We love animals so much that we created new ones to populate our folklore and inspire our imaginations. A cute animal logo is a great way to connect with pet owners or really, anyone, even if your product doesn’t directly have anything to do with animals. The Car Fox is one example of a product that has nothing to do with animals cementing itself in our minds with a cute animal mascot. Geico is another.

You really can’t go wrong with a cute animal logo, and if you’re marketing to pet owners, nature lovers or kids, it’s one way to guarantee you go right.

Personifying animals makes it easy for viewers to project emotions on them. What’s this cat feeling? Relaxed from a hot cup of tea? Energized by its coffee? Logo design contest entry by Spoon Lancer.

A cute animal logo will always be a hit with pet owners. Logo design for Exercise my Mutt by Cross the Lime.

Deliciously adorable logos —

You ever see something that’s so cute, you just wanna eat it up? Like a baby’s squishy thighs or a big-eyed baby bunny? You can thank your brain for that—research shows that the smell of a newborn triggers the same reward center in the brain as biting into a delicious piece of food. Cuteness is already intricately linked with chowing down in our brains, so capitalize on these crossed wires by choosing a cute logo for your food brand.

Keep in mind that cute probably won’t work for something you’re branding as high-end or artisan. When somebody’s shopping for caviar, they don’t want to see packaging with adorable baby fish looking back at them. Choose cute for sweets, snacks, inexpensive foods and anything aimed at kids because cute is fun and youthful, not established and authoritative.

And just like making animals cute, making food cute often involves giving it human characteristics. Logo for Cookiestomize by Nico Strike.

Cute cupcake logo design by Naomi Theresia

Nonthreateningly neoteenie-weeny logos —

In evolutionary biology, neoteny is the retention of juvenile traits into adulthood, like a proportionally larger head, shorter limbs, and larger eyes. Humans are attracted to animals with more juvenile traits, pushing them to protect and eventually, domesticate them.

This type of change doesn’t happen automatically. But millennia of humans picking out the cutest pups can change a species dramatically. Via ksta.de.

In design, neoteny refers to characters drawn with purposefully exaggerated, youthful features. Logos that make use of exaggeratedly cute “baby” characters are great choices for baby products, toys, products for little kids, and products aimed at parents-to-be and parents of babies and little kids. These characters are non-threatening and friendly. They’re the perfect ambassadors for connecting with new audiences, especially when you’re connecting across language barriers. Cute is cute, no matter what language you speak.

Over time, Mickey Mouse got cuter. This art evolution happened alongside his personality development, as he went from a mischievous character in early cartoon shorts to a family-friendly, wholesome figure. Via Tribe Tech magazine.

Even with certain adult characteristics like antlers and horns, these animals have oversized heads and eyes, two juvenile features that translate to “cute.” Logo for Moosey & Moo by Art and Pixels.

Kawaii logo design —

Cuteness as a concept, known as kawaii, is prominent in Japanese culture. It has its roots in the 1970s, when high school girls using mechanical pencils popularized a childlike handwriting style known as marui ji, or round writing, also known as koneko ji, or kitten writing. Now, kawaii is everywhere, even at dinner theaters.

Hello Kitty is kawaii. Many pokemon are kawaii. But what sets kawaii apart from Western interpretations of cuteness? Kawaii is simple. Although it’s deliberately childlike, kawaii aesthetics have found their way onto a wide, wide range of products and carved a special niche among adult women. Lots of different things can be kawaii, but everything that’s kawaii shares a few key characteristics:

Rounded edges

Minimal details

When kawaii means anthropomorphization—and it often does—it means big eyes

When you go kawaii, you go specific. You’re not just targeting an audience that’s drawn to cute things, you’re targeting an audience that’s drawn to things that are cute in a distinctly Japanese-inspired way. This can be an important distinction for you if you’re in the video games or comics field.

Kawaii eyes are big like western cute eyes, but often, they don’t have irises. Logo design contest entry by K Arts.

Fun-size logos —

One of the easiest ways to make something cute it to make it small. Yes, there’s more to cuteness than size, and as we mentioned above, shrinking something to cuteify it generally involves changing its proportions, but don’t underestimate how important size is to cuteness.

When somebody says “I want a cute car,” what kind of car comes to mind? Probably a Smart Car, a Mini Cooper or a Volkswagen Beetle, not a full-size SUV or a pickup truck. Now think of a cute house. You’re probably envisioning some kind of cottage or cabin, not a sprawling mansion with multiple wings. The fact is, humans love little things because little things are cute. They’re unintimidating. Compare regular golf to mini golf—one of them’s typically reserved for serious business types and real sports enthusiasts and the other one’s for families and teenagers on dates looking to drive fun-colored balls through clowns’ mouths and under rotating windmills. Little things are fun and make us feel like kids again. They make us feel safe and in control.

If you’re looking to capture cuteness without getting too big-eyed or babyish, try simply scaling down the elements in your logo. Playing around with scale can take it from cookie-cutter to cute enough to capture the audience you want to capture (in a cute net!)

This combination of two little kids sitting on a tiny moon is just adorable. Logo design by Mainstream Account

Calling all the cuties —

Cute kitten in a box. Logo design by John Baiatul.

There are a lot of things a cute logo can do for your brand. It can carve you a permanent spot in your core demographic’s heart or it can be a signal to new audiences outside your core demographic who might not otherwise notice your brand or know that there’s a place for them in your consumer base. How a cute logo works for you depends largely on the product it’s representing.

And sometimes, that means a cute logo won’t work. Maybe your business is about banking or law. Cute and the law can mix in an abstract, ironic cartoon way, but using a cute logo for your inheritance law firm might just make people uncomfortable. No matter how big the eyes you draw on your lawyer mascot are, there’s a chance it ends up looking forced.

Cute also doesn’t work when it crosses the line into cutesy. Cute makes an automatic connection, cutesy tries to force a connection by being overly sentimental. Think a nauseatingly, sickeningly sweet feeling like you just finished a cotton candy the size of your head, then translate that feeling to an image. That’s cutesy. Basically, if the cute is forced, it’s not cute. It’s cutesy.

When you’re not sure how a cute logo will work for you, sketch out some of your brand’s core values. If your aim is to make viewers comfortable with your product without taking it too seriously, cute is for you.

Want a cute logo that will make people go ‘awww’?

Our designers can create the perfect adorable brand mark for you.

Yes please!

The post 41 cute logos that are totally aww-some appeared first on 99designs.

via https://99designs.co.uk/blog/

41 cute logos that are totally aww-some syndicated from https://www.lilpackaging.com/

[thekrazykeke]

I’m of the belief that if a nigga cheats, either cheat too and dump the dude, or get that nigga jumped on and dump that dude. 

However, technically, very technically, Erik fuckboy Stevens did not ever put a label on what he was tryna do with the reader besides fucking, and ol’ girl also knew he was potential drama but fucked wit him anyway. SO. Is it in anyway surprising what inevitably happened? That depends on y’all perspective. 

Continued from here.

“The fuck happened to your face?” Is the first thing out of Darius’ mouth when you opened the front door. 

Before you could say a word, your niece cut in. “Daddy, ain’t it obvious? Aunt Y/N got into a fight and lost.” Nakida commented, voice and posture radiating sass and teenage rebellion. 

“I did not lose!”

“That’s not what Aunt Nadia sayin’ on Facebook.”

You glanced back at said woman who looked like a deer in headlights. Giving her a ‘bitch, this ain’t over’ look, you return to your family. “That’s not what happened at all.”

“I hope you beat her up. Uncle Davion and Isiah always hyping your fights--”

Darius had enough, snatching her phone. “Okay, little girl. Go sit your bad ass down.” Kia flounced over to where an empty spot on the couch was, dropping heavily onto the furniture, nearly throwing Nadia to the ground in the process. Nadia cut her a look but Nakida didn’t pay her any attention. “I need you to watch her for today. Just a couple hours while I’m at work.”

“And why can’t her momma?” You’re suspicious.

“Look, it’s complicated. Just...just please do this for yo big bruh, yea?”

Shaking your head, you sigh. “For you, a’ight.” You hmm’ed when he gave you a half hug and kissed the side of your forehead. “Okay, okay! I get it, love you too. Now let go.” 

Darius laughed before blowing a kiss at his daughter. “Love you, baby. Be good for your aunt, peanut, ‘kay?”

“Yeah, Dad. Love you too. Bye.” As soon as he left, she looked at you. “I’m hungry. Can we have Chinese for dinner?”

“No, but you can go to the kitchen and fix yourself a bologna sandwich.” She smacked her lips and rolled her eyes. “Or you can wait til your dad gets here. You ain’t gotta eat our food, boo boo.” 

“That’s right. Check yaself, little girl.” Nadia added. 

“Okay, Miss Dippin’, you ain’t in it either.” You pointed at her. 

“What, girl, I gotcha back!”

You rolled your eyes, “Yeah, whatever.” Taking a seat, you pull out your cellphone just as Nakida lumbered towards the kitchen. 

‘Nigga, bye.’ Rolling your eyes, you turn your phone on vibrate and place it on the dresser to avoid temptation. The urge to call him up and cuss his ass out nearly overpowering but you wasn’t tryna set a bad image for your niece. 

It was already terrible enough that she’d seen your face all kinds of jacked up. And with the rest of the fam probably hyping her up, she could get the idea that fighting in school was cute. 

“Make me a sandwich too! Add some of that spicy cheese on there.” You call to the teen in the kitchen. “You hook it up and I’ll order the Chinese.”

Nadia looked at you like you’re crazy. Getting that stuff delivered in this neighborhood, to this apartment, is horrendously expensive but you didn’t care at the moment.

“You want mayo or mustard?! How bout some pickles and these yellow jalapenos?”

“Surprise me! Hook it up, girl, hook it up.” 

Thus that’s how it went. 

Nakida, Nadia and you had an impromptu girls’ day. Blasting Beyonce, dancing on the couch, pretending to hit them high notes (in truth, y’all sounded like cats being murdered but whatever) and manicures, facials, etc. Nadia managed to weasel out the whole truth of why Nakida beat the hell out of those two girls, and although you weren’t too surprised that they’d been picking on her for awhile, you’d wished that she’d said something sooner. 

‘But snitches look weak.’ You wish you had the words to help, but you didn’t. So, instead you gave her an extra spring roll from your box. 

Darius had to stay at work longer than expected but you didn’t mind keeping Nakida company. The two of you stayed up watching Inuyasha together, complaining about how stupid Kagome was and that Kikyo was a bitch. It’s close to ten at night when your brother finally arrives and Nakida is conked out. He gathers her up in his arms, saying thanks and you reply any time, that she’s always welcome, and she is. 

You’re not an expert at life, but you knew what it’s like to be lost, without guidance, if you could be a safe harbor for her until she learned how to swim... Well, you’d do it happily. 

As you’re cleaning up the mess, you’re yawning off and on, about to fall asleep while standing up, then there’s a knock at the door. Rolling your eyes heavenward, asking for strength, you walk over to the front door and look out the peephole. 

It’s Erik.

“Go away.” You said without opening the door, your words undoubtedly muffled, but he can hear you fine. 

“Can we please talk about this? You been ignoring my texts and calls all day.”

You scritched at your hair lightly. “Ain’t nothing you need to explain, Erik. You ain’t my nigga, I’m not your girl. You allowed to sleep with whoever you please. I don’t care.” 

“I didn’t sleep with her though. Not with anyone...look.” There’s a thump and he’s probably leaning against the door. “Please, let me come in. I just want to see your face.” 

‘Lord Jesus, what would you do?’ There’s no answer and you hadn’t really expected one. After an internal struggle, you unlatched the door and unbolted the locks, twisting the knob, you pull it open. “I’ve had a long day and I wanna sleep. So, five minutes. Go.”

He ran inside but was smart enough not to reach out and touch you. “Damn, Y/N, yo face...”

“Four minutes and fifty seven seconds, nigga.”

“I’m...” He took a deep breath, a complicated expression on his face. “Sorry about earlier. About Samara and everything that happened after. It looked suspect as fuck but I wasn’t tryna get her out of there because I was sleeping with the girl. I just didn’t want any drama.”

You pursed your lips. “Mm.” 

“I ain’t been fucking with nobody but you.” 

“Uh-huh.” 

“Look, can you cut the tough girl act for five seconds. I’m tryna be real wit yo ass--” You cut him a look that could cut steel and he glared back at you before he sighed, shoulders slumping. “...I know you ain’t tryna fuck with me like that, but I like you.”

Your heart turned over in your chest but you tried to keep a calm facade. “Yea, whatever.”

“I’m serious. You mean as hell, and you prolly only dealt with me because I buy video games for us to have an excuse to chill together, but I like you. Even though your taste in anime characters is lousy.” 

“Itachi is a real nigga and Sasuke is a emo ass bitch that deserved to get merked!! I’m not changing my mind!” He smiled then, dimples showing and you looked away from him, arms crossed in front of yourself. “You get on my nerves.” 

Sensing that the danger had passed, he finally approached, wrapping his arms around you. “I like you.” 

“Okay...” You turn your face from him, unwilling to give in just yet.

“I like you.” He murmured softly, the words warm against your ear. “I like you, baby.” Erik crooned, hands wandering down your shirt, about to drift under the material.

You stopped him. “Uh-uh. That’s how this whole mess started. You starting from ground zero, nigga.” 

He kissed his teeth but obligingly removed his hand. “Forreal?”

“Dates and all that other shit. I expect to be wined and dined, so don’t try me with no Burger King or Mickie D’s.” As you talked, you were nudging him out of your space.

“You was messin’ with some lame ass broke niggas then.”

Snorting, you rolled your eyes with a shrug. “I guess I upgraded.” 

“No guessing, you did.” 

“Always got something smart to say don’tchu?” You’re exasperated. “Let me have the last w--” He tilted your chin up and kissed you. Once, twice, and the third time, he sucked on your tongue, hands bracing underneath your ass to keep you from falling. “Erik.”

“Just something to tide me over. Ground zero, I gotchu, ma.” He held his hands up, an ‘innocent’ expression gracing his face. “Come on, stop cleaning for a sec. Come play me in this game.” 

It was likely your eyes would get stuck with how hard and often you’d been rolling them today. “You lucky you cute.” 

He copped a seat on the floor, cheesing as he set up the system. 

“I like you too.” 

[internet----girlfriend-blog]

On Saying Goodbye, or Making Meaning Out of Nothing

   I’ve never been great at saying goodbyes. Generally, I will stand around uncomfortably and shift myself closer and closer to the door until I can escape. With phone conversations, it’s even worse. It’s not that I don’t want to talk, it’s just that I can’t deal with the silence that comes before saying goodbye.  Most people who know me understand by now that they can expect an abrupt hang-up instead of a goodbye. I think this is mostly because I have an irrational fear of permanence and would rather leave abruptly than face the absoluteness that comes with a goodbye. This is probably because I am mostly a very overdramatic Sagittarius and I watch too many movies.

   I moved out of my parents’ house for the first time when I was eighteen. Within a week of graduating high school I was in the next state over. I didn’t have a hard time saying goodbye to my family but I cried like a baby when I hugged our dog for the last time before leaving. At least my mom could text; the dog didn’t have thumbs. I had expectations that this move would be much more emotional and dramatic, maybe even grandiose, but it was quiet and calm and unassuming. Again, I watch too many movies. I backed out of the driveway in my Kia and tried not to think about our dog. This was my first goodbye that ever really mattered; if you ask my Aquarius mother, it is the only goodbye that’s mattered so far.   

   While trying to escape the small town I grew up in, I ended up in an even smaller town. The name of this town is irrelevant because it’s so small that Google Maps won’t even recognize it as a real place. The deluxe Sheetz gas station was the main attraction, and the closest grocery store was a forty-five minute drive away.  I lived with my first serious boyfriend in this town. He was the first Aries I dated. We stayed in a large apartment over a lawyer’s office and in the summer I sat in front of the windows and listened to people shout and argue with each other about things that I didn’t understand at the time. Our neighbors were visited by the cops almost weekly because their fights got so bad that someone always ended up getting hit. I spent a lot of nights in my room with my ear pressed to the wall, listening to their fighting and learning all of their intimate secrets.  I didn’t think this was weird at the time. Our lease ended the following summer and, no longer fueled by the intensity of the honeymoon phase of our relationship, we decided to part ways. I didn’t cry once but he did keep my record collection, which hurt more than anything else.  I drove back to Ohio in the same Kia and tried not to think about my limited-press editions that I would never see again. This was my second goodbye that ever really seemed to matter.

   I moved back into my parents’ house when I was nineteen. I stayed in their attic and drove twenty-five minutes to work in Cleveland every day. I worked in a tiny restaurant that made most of its money from breakfast rushes and overpriced alcohol. It sat on the corner of Detroit Ave and bragged about the “friendly neighborhood atmosphere” more than embodied it.  I wasn’t allowed to park in the parking lot of this tiny restaurant and I acquired more parking tickets in that time than tip money. The men who worked in the kitchen would crudely talk about my haircut and my facial piercings and the way my ass looked in skinny jeans. The turnover rate was incredibly high, mostly due to the fact that the woman who owned the restaurant was batshit fucking insane and known to be violent.  I quit my job at this tiny restaurant when I was twenty and still living at home. I quit in the middle of a particularly hectic morning shift when I dropped a Bloody Mary on the floor and the owner called me an idiot in front of customers. The Bloody Mary shattered on the floor and stained my white Vans with tomato juice. I walked out, collected the parking ticket from my windshield, and drove home. I was never able to get the stains out of my shoes; it almost felt like one final “fuck you” from the tiny restaurant. This goodbye doesn’t really matter that much now but it felt like it mattered at the time.

   I moved out of my parents’ house for the second time when I was twenty. I lived in an apartment in Cleveland Heights with three other people that I didn’t really know. The apartment was overpriced with high ceilings and narrow hallways. There was always trash everywhere and the kitchen smelled like rotting food. A rice cooker sat in the corner, generally filled with molding rice. The bathroom had a standing shower with a perpetually clogged drain and dirty clothes covered the floor. I was a freshman in college and I spent most of my time at the school to avoid being in the gross apartment. I stayed over at friend’s places and only came home when absolutely necessary. I smoked a lot of weed and did a lot of acid and didn’t sleep and lived off of Clif bars and sugar-free Redbull. I broke up with my then-boyfriend because he was cheating on me with a woman twentyish years older than me. She was a sexually robust woman in her forties who went by the name Bunny and she had a daughter who was also older than me at the time. We met at a mutual friend’s party and she introduced herself by telling me that my boyfriend was good with his tongue. This initially confused me because mostly, I just thought he tasted like Marlboro Reds. I smoke American Spirits. He was the second Aries I dated, coincidentally with the same first name as the first Aries. I never spoke to him again. This goodbye mattered because I no longer had anybody to bring me free weed and help me build IKEA furniture in my shitty apartment.

   I turned twenty-one over the winter break of my freshman year of college. I was living with my parents again, after leaving the shitty apartment during Thanksgiving break. All of my friends were out of state so I bought myself a cheap bottle of gas station wine and invited a boy from Tinder over to my house. We made out on the couch and I knew he was going to hurt me. He did. He was a poet and a playwright with a big ego and a vaguely Italian-sounding name. He lived with his mom and did stand-up comedy on the weekends. I will never trust a stand-up comedian. He was a Capricorn, which also cannot be trusted.  He made fun of me for listening to emo music and I made fun of him for liking musical theater. We went on for months, sleeping together and refusing to acknowledge the fact that we were sleeping together. I moved into an apartment on Coventry while I was still seeing him and he would come over to drink and argue with my Pisces friends. He had a girlfriend almost the entirety of the time I was seeing him. We didn’t know about each other. She was a Gemini. I found out he had graciously given me an STD months after we had already stopped talking. He still follows me on Instagram. This goodbye was extremely prolonged and painful and overdramatic. This was the kind of goodbye I had been expecting when I left home for the first time, but instead it was with a dumb boy. It still mattered, probably.

   I moved out of Cleveland Heights the week before the end of my sophomore year of college. I left behind an apartment that never really felt like home and moved into another apartment that sometimes feels like home. I left behind my bitterness and anger but managed to pick up uncertainty and consistent self-doubt along the way. I moved into a big, old apartment building in Shaker Heights with my (very recently) ex-boyfriend. The first night in our new place we got a pizza and tried to coax my cat out from hiding in the furniture. I cried because I knew I was going to feel trapped, not unlike my cat, probably. I cried because I thought about my mom and how sad I make her. I cried because I knew nothing was ever going to be enough for me. I chalked it up to the fact that I am an overdramatic Sagittarius and ignored those feelings for five more months. I felt like this was a goodbye that mattered, but I’m not exactly sure what I said goodbye to. I’m still trying to figure it out, but I probably never will.

   I spent the summer in this apartment in Shaker Heights doing nothing and taking care of plants and my cat, who’s a Gemini. I drank a lot of wine in the evenings and stopped eating and started sleeping too much. I ignored my friends and didn’t pick up the phone or text anyone back. I only left the house to go to work and came back immediately after my shifts, feeling too anxious to be outside or in public alone. I laid in bed at night, sweating because we don’t have air conditioning, thinking about dying and what my parents would say at my funeral. This time, those thoughts didn’t feel so overdramatic, which was scary. As the summer went on, I thought less about dying and more about escaping, leaving school, leaving my job, leaving my relationship. I applied for study-abroad programs and ignored their acceptance emails. My boyfriend was working full-time, usually over-time, and so I spent most of my days completely isolated, planning my escape. I looked at apartments for rent in cities I’ve never been to, or even considered going to. I spent a weekend in Columbus and then another weekend in Detroit, always dreading coming back to Cleveland. I felt like I had been living as a ghost for the last six months of my life and I was desperately trying to figure out how to become human again. I feel like I’ve said goodbye to this image I’ve curated so carefully for myself, completely disregarding everything I thought I knew about myself and now I’m scrambling around, trying to understand what happened. This is it, this is the big one, the most melodramatic, the most important goodbye.

   I left my first serious, adult relationship last week. We were only together for a little over a year, but it felt like a lot longer. We still live together, so that’s been awkward. When the conversation actually happened, I felt less sad and more relieved. I didn’t even cry. I sat on the chair in our living room and he sat on the couch, asking me what happened. I don’t know what happened. Falling out of love is weird. Realizing that you have a better time hanging out with your friends than spending time with your partner is weird. Understanding that it’s not anyone’s fault and that two people can still care about each other very much but not be in love anymore is weird. We are both fire signs and we are both very overdramatic. And we watch too many movies. He doesn’t believe in astrology, but he’s the stereotype of a Leo. I’ve been listening to a lot of Sufjan Stevens and the National, thinking really hard about what went wrong, and where, and what we could have done to change it, or prolong it even more, or ignore it completely. This goodbye feels like a death. This goodbye will leave a lasting imprint, on both people involved. This goodbye matters.

   I’ll be turning twenty-three in a couple months. I’ve said countless goodbyes, see-yous and catch-you-laters in my life so far. I’ll say a billion more. This isn’t meant to be some deep, soul-searching essay or even a reflection. More an examination. No matter how many goodbyes I say, I know they’ll all matter, even if they become arbitrary later. I’m still not any better at saying it. I will probably never be comfortable saying it. I know I’m always going to be a melodramatic Sagittarius. Maybe someday I won’t define myself that way, but today is not that day.

[cursed-in-barovia]

Session 4

At Gregori’s shop, The Hare & Hair, the group decided to do a little shopping with money and items found throughout the adventure so far.  Gregori was only interested in coin, hides, furs, and other decorative animal parts.  Once everyone was satisfied with their purchases, Gregori invited the group for a meal at the Seven Tables Inn because the wolf pup completely destroyed his pantry and ate most, if not all of his food before it ran away.

It was about 6pm, snow still covered the village, but the storm seemed to be on a short break. While Gregori escorted the group to the inn, Zemotta and Devotion stayed behind at the shop.  Devotion wasn’t feeling well.  Perhaps the recent events were too much, or maybe it was something bothering her from her past.

The Seven Tables Inn had an open tavern where villagers were winding down after a day’s work.  You noticed that ALL of the people of Orasnou are human and a lot of them seem to lack expression in their faces and wore muted tones of clothing, while the more lively people had brighter colors in their apparel. Marku Grelon, the owner, could be seen behind the tavern bar, cleaning glasses and tending to customers. Upon entering the tavern, Gregori rushed over to Marku, and through Dundee’s observation, he was able to see that Gregori was trying to redeem a deal he and Marku had.  A favor owed.  All Gregori wanted was a free round of meals to feed his guests.  Marku wasn’t too happy about it, and agreed to meals, but Gregori would have to cover the cost of drinks.  

Meanwhile lots of other conversations could be heard in the tavern: “Have you seen the increased number of guards Burgomaster Randovich now has watching over his home? What’s he guarding?”, “Apparently there’s some sort of ancient artifact that was once important to Strahd hiding somewhere around here.”, “You just KNOW that the stuff that Fillar is selling at his Eyes of Midnight shop are stolen goods.”, “Have you see this new guy Arik in the wolfskin cap? He only seems to speak to Fillar and avoids anyone else.  Some say he smells strange and awful.”

After his negotiation with Marku, Gregori embarrassingly approached the table that you all took seat at, and relayed the deal. He kindly asked that you don’t go too overboard on the drinks.  He didn’t have too much coin to spare.  It wasn’t too long before Nori, Dundee, Tomigot, and Zoras started ordering many drinks each.  Nori could see the beads of sweat start to dribble over Gregori’s face as each drink was served.

Meanwhile, at another table there were two villagers, Alek and Hans, playing Liars Dice.  This got Dundee’s attention and captured Tomigot’s curiosity.  With pockets full newly acquired gold, Dundee and Tomigot agreed to a few games, while Zoras watched.  Nori scanned the room for any loose or unattended coins and successfully swiped 1gp from the bar top, just before Marku went to turn around to collect it.  A coin wedged inside the cracks of one of the tables also caught Nori’s thieving attention. This coin wasn’t so easy to pry, as years of gunk and old beer acted as mortar to seal it into the crack.

At the game table, after a few rolls and a constant, nerve-wrecking increase of bets, mostly by Dundee, Alek won the first game with a luck hand of four 6’s to win 68gp.  With gold fever, Alek asked for another game, and so another game was played.  The pot was growing fasting and faster as Dundee kept raising the bets by 10gp!  Tomigot noticed something fishy going on with Dundee’s hand and eventually decided to “go see the lady half-orc in the room.”  Alek and Hans had a good laugh because there was nothing but humans in the room! Except for Zoras, Nori, and Tomigot himself, of course.  The game continued, Alek folded, and it was just Hans and Dundee left.   Eventually the betting fizzled out and Zemotta finally came to the inn to witness Hans proudly present his hand of four 6’s while Dundee triumphantly displayed his FIVE 6’s to win 133gp!

Drinks kept coming, and at one point Nori handed 5gp to Marku as Gregori witnessed from across the room and mouthed the words “Thank You” to Nori in return. The group was ready to get some much needed sleep, but a trek back to Gregori’s, through the snow, was too much.  So Marku invited everyone to stay at his inn, he had enough rooms available.  In his drunken state, Tomigot thought the top of a tavern table would be a much better bed, and passed out.  Zoras demanded his own room for his beauty sleep.  Zemotta and Nori shared a room while Dundee also had a room to himself.

Just as everyone was finally beginning to sleep, a strange, beastly feeling started to emerge from within Tomigot’s passed out body in the middle of an empty tavern.  Blood rushed through his veins, his nails began to grow, his nose turned into a snout.  His body become covered in fur.  He wasn’t hungry, he was STARVING.  After a loud howl, and pushing and throwing furniture around, he rushed through the tavern doors, leaving a werewolf shaped hole, allowing the light dusting of snow from the outside to trickle into the room.

Zemotta could hear the ruckus and rushed to investigate.  She was startled to see that Tomigot was gone, the tavern was a mess, and that there was a new hole in the door.  She went to alert the rest of the party. 

It was early in the night, the snow was sprinkling down, lightly covering any fresh tracks that might have been left by Tomigot.  Determined to find him, the group set off to see into the cold darkness.  The subtle tracks lead to the entrance of the forest that surrounded Oraşnau.   Howls of wolves could be heard from every direction. Zoras lit some torches and the party headed in. After an hour into the forest, 2 zombies were seen trudging through the 3 feet of snow between the trees. After several arrow shots and force blasts, they were taken out.   Eventually the group followed the tracks to a crossroad.  It was almost as if it were a game trail or werewolf/wolf highway, FULL of tracks, making it impossible to pinpoint any single creature.  Defeated, the group returned to the inn in hopes to catch some much needed sleep and that Tomigot would return in the morning.

The group returned to the inn at about 2am.  It wasn’t long before everyone fell asleep and began to have dreams;  Nori successfully prying the coin out of the crack in the table, Zoras seeing images of shiny feathers, Zemotta seeing life without her favorite “ladder”, Dundee having visions of a spotted snow cat up at the top of an icy mountain peak.   At around 6am, Zemotta and Zoras could hear some commotion going on down stairs.   Marku was upset and reacting to the mess in the tavern and suspicious of Tomigot as he returned to the inn.  The group’s rest was, once again, interrupted.  Everyone came downstairs from their rooms to greet Tomigot. He was a little woozy, tired, and weakened with deep scratches on his sides.  While Zemotta tended to his wounds, Tomigot couldn’t really remember what happened that night.  All he could remember was a horse, how good a horse tastes, and then an undead humanoid creature taking swipes at him.

Fearful of what it meant to be a werewolf and having a new lust for blood, Tomigot wanted to rid his curse.  This, of course, had to happen after a long rest, so everyone returned to their rooms.  At around noon, like morning of a winter holiday, Nori ran across the road to Gregori’s shop, before even getting fully dressed, to see if he had any coal and herbs.  He wasn’t sure what he would find but began to sift through the pile of ruin the wolf pup left behind.  A large handful of sprigs of herbs were collected from the trash, as well as some coals from the fire.  Nori thanked him and eagerly ran back to the inn to throw the items into a bronze brazer.  After a few words, a raggedy winged owl emerged, with missing feathers and a blind-looking eye.  “A trash bird!”  Nori named it Chi.

Meanwhile, Zoras enjoyed several mimosas and late breakfast.  Dundee asked Marku about any sightings of a snow cat. Low and behold, Marku had heard of there being an elusive cat that lived high up in the mountains at the tallest peak. Nobody has been able to catch it to prove its existence, and that there was actually a standing bet that the thing wasn’t real.   Determined to prove that rumor wrong, Dundee added to the wager with the condition that if he didn’t return to the inn with that snow cat, then he’ll share 100gp with everyone who’s in on the bet.

Zemotta and Tomigot had also gone over to Gregori’s shop to see if the town’s new elves might know how to cure Tomigot.  Aya had motioned to Zemotta to not mention anything about werewolves to Gregori.  Most people don’t respond well to the topic of them.  She mentioned that Jeny Greenteeth, the old woman that previously requested golden elk hearts,  might be able to help.  She’s a little odd but talented with spells.

The group gathered back at the inn to put a plan together.  It was soon decided that the partly would go along with the elves to find Jeny Greenteeth and possibly find any furs along the way, and then see about finding the cat that Dundee was after.  The snow was now 4 feet high, but no match for Zoras’ ice plow.  The elves soon spotted 2 golden elks ahead.  Everyone with a ranged weapon took a shot at the elk.  One of Nori's attempts with Zoras' crossbow backfired with a snap of the string to the face.  After a few hits, Tomigot’s new, heightened senses could smell the blood, causing the beast inside him to reemerge.  His hybrid werewolf form was revealed and he was hungry.  The closest piece of meat was in the form of an air genasi.  Dundee quickly set his snare in front of Tomigot, but it didn’t stop him from giving Nori-Wes two strong swipes of his claws.  The elves moved toward the elk to preserve them from a werewolf feast.  Zemotta moved back, fearful that she might be a snack, while Zoras threw an illusion of a snack inside of Dundee’s snare in the form a juicy steak.  The lure of the steak worked to distract Tomigot, but the snare was no match for his reflects.  Once he realized the steak wasn’t real, the Tomigot returned to his half-orc self, without completely knowing what just had happened, but immediately apologized for whatever he might have done.  He then ripped some fabric from his clothes and shoved them up his nose.  Zoras offered to make them smell nicer and at Tomigot’s request, they smelled like flowers…and then like new picture books.  The urgency to find Jeny was even more obvious.

Low and behold, as the party traveled deeper into the woods, they saw an old lady walking along the trail in front of them.   It was Jeny!  She wasn’t too thrilled to see people, let alone ones she’s already met, yet she wouldn’t stop blabbering about how she got displaced because of the mist and that she had to start everything from scratch again.  Once she realized Tomigot needed help, she invited everyone to her shed that was a work in progress.  She explained that not only did she require gold for her spell casting services, but she also asked for favors.  To remove Tomigot’s curse, need a lingering embraced.  A relieved Tomigot gave her the biggest hug she had every received.  Jeny seemed to really enjoy it, while Zoras tried to get in on the action.  All he got was an disgusted, evil eye from Jeny.  Once the hug was over, she asked Tomigot how he felt.  He seemed to feel much better!  The werewolf bite on his arm was nowhere to be found! "Works every time!" said Jeny, proud of her spell casting skills.

Nori hesitantly asked if Jeny could heal wounds.  “Of course I can!  It’ll cost you 10GP and then we’re going to have a staring contest.  The first one to blink loses!”  Nori and Jeny’s eyes locked on each other’s and then Jeny tried to scream really loud to break Nori’s concentration, but instead choked and lost the challenge. Nori felt a little more healthy afterward.  She also offered a freshly brewed potion of healing for 50gp to take on the road.  Nori accepted!

With everyone healed, it was off to find Dundee’s cat!  It 3 hours later they got to the based of the mountain peak that was mentioned in the rumor.  A deep ledge could be seen at the top to the right, about 300 feet, where two shadowy figures could be seen amongst a lingering fog.  To get to the top the party would have to climb up 100 foot increments, up icy slopes, to different shallow ledges of the peak.  No paths could be found.  With Tomigot being the strongest of the group, he tied two ropes together, and then to a grappling hook.  The first swing of the rope and throw of the hook was expertly done.  He was able to hook into the first ledge and fairly easily climb up to then reel the rest of the party in, one by one.  This repeated at each ledge.  By the time it got to throwing the hook to the last ledge, Tomigot had grown tired.  It became difficult to not only throw the grappling hook the full distance, but the ice seemed to be more slippery, making it more difficult to climb was the rope was hooked.

Eventually everyone climbed the 300 feet to reach the ledge where the shadowy figures were seen. Upon closer inspection and a quick clearing of the fog, two yetis could be seen, along with an emaciated snow leopard chained inside a cave!  Each yeti was alerted by the poor stealth of some of the party members. As they approached the group, missing patches of fur and rotten flesh could be seen hanging off their bodies.  Their eyes were bloodshot, yet foggy.  These aren’t healthy creatures!

TO BE CONTINUED…