#aka my favorite aro and aroace posts

[the-stars-were-his]

the aromantic agenda

x | x | x | x | x | x | x | x | x | x | x

@makelimeade @kiwimuichiro @fallenrain40 @redysetdare @canonically47 @arodabi @drakenhert @pinnakoladda @thisvegetabledoesntfallinlove @midnightcrisisstuff @the-nefarious-vampire

[taswritesstuff]

hey everyone here i am again with that oc side blog i said i was going to make ages ago but anyway

for those who don't know me, hi, i'm tas (he/it, aroace, trans). i'm a writer and spend most of my time here over on my main blog, @t1oui, talking about fandom stuff (mostly harry potter/marauders and percy jackson, as well as random reblogs). i also have another side blog, @tassaysarostuff, which is a blog exclusively for aro, ace, & aroace things.

all of my other blogs in the past have been exclusively for oc stuff but i think this way of going about things is going to be a lot more fun :)

as for what to expect on this blog, i'll put some tags that i'll use in the future down below for organization purposes:

the realms - my main wip (YA but with discussions of sex | high fantasy ft romance, self-discovery, self love, and a lot of found family)

tSBoM - my non-magical universe that has a LOT of characters (almost all of the characters are teens when the story starts, but there will definitely be really heavy themes so probably adult)

tCoR - another high fantasy wip (YA | a girl ends up in an unfamiliar world without any memories, only the knowledge that something is after her | aka a "chosen one" type of thing)

tsw thsw osw - three stories taking place over a span of multiple decades in a world where monsters known as "aliens" (capital A) have taken over (more chosen one stuff, not sure if this will be YA or adult bc of some themes)

tWoA - high fantasy very big wip that i've been neglecting... it definitely needs a lot of replotting if it's going to get any more focus is all i'll say

beachside - a group of kids get stuck in an alternate, much more hostile version of their world. (YA | features romance, found family, and some of my favorite names i've ever given my ocs <3)

honestly i'm forgetting some of my own wips so i'll leave it at that for now :) reminder that everything being posted on here is centered around my original ideas, stories, and characters, and you may not "borrow" and/or use any of them yourself.

[faemytho]

I’m not really in the hazbin hotel fandom ((I love the show don’t get me wrong I’m just not in the fandom)) but I kinda wanna see what you mean? Also I figure you’re still okay with people shipping him just either the fact that people ignore that canonical he is aroace sex repulsed or use it as a “oh we just have to fix him” trope (which fuck that trope)

Same asker that admitted to not really being in the hazbin hotel fandom but liking the show- thought it over and i actually don’t know how you could do Alstser (can’t spell bare with me) without having him as aroace sex repulsed without having him look barely anything like the original- maybe apart from that fic you made a while back

-

okay so, in regards to this post i made earlier about aroace romantic/sex repulsed alastor, that was a headcanon. (i said, and i quote, its canon bc i said so, but in reality ive fooled u all it was just a headcanon i even said so in the tags)

my headcanons aside, alastor IS canonically ace, as referenced by this tweet below (and hey, canon bi character!!! we love that!!)

there is also a footnote on the HH wiki that says alastor is aromantic as well, but the footnote links to a four hour stream video, and i do not actually have the patience to comb through it to see if that's true or not (or if it even came from the mouth of vivzie)

uh, yeah. here's the link to the stream, in case anyone wanted it/was curious.

canonicities aside, lets get one thing out of the way:

i am all for ignoring canon, using fandom to do whatever you want, ect ect, all power to the fans and whatnot, do what you want and be free because its fiction

which means, yes, i am 1000% okay with people shipping alastor with whoever they want! with angel, with charlie, with husk, with vaggie, with nifty, ect ect ect, i don't care, ship what you want, be free, live your best life.

my problem, though, is this: literally nobody in this fandom knows how to write an ace character. and when they do write him as "ace", its OFFENSIVE.

i cannot COUNT the amount of alastor fics ive read where he's supposedly written as asexual (and its usually even tagged in the fic tags, "asexual character"), then ends up sexually attracted to his given partner for that fic, and when they actually go to do the deed, alastor is infantilized to, well, hell and back. and by that, i mean a few things.

he either:

doesn't understand his sudden sexual attraction and/or sexual feelings

doesn't understand what's going on during the sex scene

doesn't know the proper terms for body parts and sexual processes

is HIGHLY feminized and is categorized as "submissive" while the partner becomes the "dominant" and continues on with the sex scene

not only is that fourth one misogynistic and homophobic (an entire other can of worms about how feminine sub/masculine dom in homosexual relationships enforces toxic heteronormativity, aka, the idea that one must "be the girl" and one must "be the man"), but all four of these together are aphobic when you realize, "hey, alastor is an ace character".

off my point a little bit, but ANY relationship (gay, straight, and/or otherwise) should not be using sub/dom as a model to follow - sub/dom is a BDSM kink thing; it should NOT be the normalized sex model for ANY relationship.

there's nothing wrong with kink! but doing BDSM wrong can severely hurt/mentally damage either partner if done incorrectly. normalizing it means that so many young people don't actually understand what sub/dom actually means, and even less the consequences if done wrong.

but back to my point: asexual people get infantilized. and we get infantilized often, because people think "oh, you're not interested in sex/you've never had sex, so you must not 1) know anything about it, 2) know anything about the real world and how nitty gritty it is to survive out here"

basically, ace people get treated like children. a lot.

here is a fantastic article that explains the rampant infantilization of both aro and ace people, and why it is aphobic to do that.

i highly recommend you all read the article, because it is fantastically well written and concise. here's my favorite paragraph:

"Society conditions us to believe that a lack of romantic or sexual attraction is a transitory period. This viewpoint assumes an inevitable progression from a nonsexual to sexual state of being that marks entry into adulthood. Similarly, engaging in romantic relationships is recognized as a milestone of maturity. This stereotyping results in the infantilization of all aromantic and asexual spectra people, especially those who are entirely romance and/or sex-averse. It also incorrectly characterizes asexual people as sex-negative, even though personal sex-aversion and general sex positivity are not mutually exclusive. Moreover, the idea of “being ready” to progress from friendships to romantic and sexual relations undermines the value of platonic relationships, which are integral to our community."

i'm going to move on to one more point, because i know if i don't, i'll get SO many alastor allo-pologist authors whining and screaming about how ace people can have sex too

and yes, here's the thing: asexual people can have sex, can want to have sex, can be sex positive... but that doesn't change the fact that to be not-asexual (or allosexual, if you'd like to use proper terms), you have to be sexually attracted or experience sexual attraction - WHICH IS NOT THE SAME THING AS HAVING A LIBIDO, AND ITS NOT SOMETHING ACE PEOPLE CAN DO/HAVE.

what ace people can have:

a libido

sex

sexual arousal

sex drive

kinks

a partner they're not necessarily sexually attracted to, but trust to have sex with them anyways

what ace people can't have (unless they're not actually ace and are instead allosexual):

sexual attraction to someone

wanting to have sex with a specific person because of this attraction (a partner, celebrity, people they find explicitly attractive)

still confused? don't be!

here's a post where i better explain the difference between sexual attraction vs sexual drive and what that means for ace people

to close this out, im going to attempt to summarize why im so pissed about this.

alastor is canonically asexual.

he may be sex negative, sex neutral, or sex positive; we don't know, but this is fandom and we're allowed to headcanon him however we wish - we can even headcanon him as not asexual!

which is great, yea, but when the ace character is the fan favorite...

people constantly and consistently write alastor as "ace".

which would be GREAT! if they ever did it correctly.

here's what i see most often. instead of headcanoning him as not asexual, they've heard something about how ace people can have sex anyways!

so for woke points, they slap their alastor ship/sex fics with the "asexual character" tag, and write alastor in one of two ways

uwu baby "ive never said a bad word in my life and i dont understand how the world works" asexual

allosexual, but call him ace anyways

both of those are aphobic. i have yet to come across ONE fic where alastor's asexuality (negative, neutral, or positive) is written, and labeled, CORRECTLY.

you know, it actually hurts MORE when he's written as "ace (actually allo)" than it does if people just headcanon him as not asexual.

alastor is a successful serial killer. he has spent decades in hell.

ALASTOR IS A SUCCESSFUL SERIAL KILLER. HE HAS SPENT DECADES IN HELL.

and you cowards are going to write him as inexperienced, ""innocent"", sexually uneducated?? i think the fuck NOT.

NOT ONLY THAT.

alastor lived through the roaring 20s. the flapper movement. the harlem renaissance. AND the sexual revolution of the 1920s. HE LIVED THROUGH ALL OF THAT. and you're going to act like he doesn't know what sex is?? we even KNOW he lived through all that because he says it himself, "i havent been that entertained since the stock market crash of 1929", and 1929 was the end of all those movements and the beginning of the great depression - and then alastor died in 1933 after living a successful serial killer life in louisiana.

tell me again, why wouldn't alastor know what sex is or how it works? and if you can't, THEN STOP WRITING HIM LIKE THAT.

please please PLEASE educate yourself before you write an asexual character. ESPECIALLY if you're going to write them with a libido, and actually ACTING on that libido.

thank you.

sincerely, an exhausted sex positive asexual.

[fractalabomination]

I send you all of them >:3c

gdi jay XD

1.Do you want a boyfriend or girlfriend?Not particularly? Especially since I’m aro/ace

2.When did your last hug take place?Roughly 4-5 weeks ago I think

3.Are you a jealous person?I’d say no, probably

4.Are you tired right now?Yes

5.Do you chew on your straws?Eenope

6.Have you ever been called a tease?Nope

7.Have you ever been awake for 48 hours straight?Yes, and I am never going to do that again, that was hell XD

8.Do you cry easily?Yeah, but most of the time I just get annoyed, like “why are these tears coming out. stop. there is no reason for you to be here go away.”

9.What should you be doing right now?Anything but this tbh, like actually watching the lectures I need to watch, revising, writing, being productive lol

10.Are you a heavy sleeper?¯\_(ツ)_/¯   

11.Do you think you can last in a relationship for 6 months?Considering that I’m aroace, or at least close enough to that, probably not, no

12.Are you mad at someone right now?The one burnt orange that’s all over the news

13.Do you believe in love?theoretically

14.What makes you laugh no matter what?That one post which was a recipe autogenerated that I can’t find but god that cracks me up every time15.Who was the last person you talked to?As a group, The Shame Circle.Individually, I guess, would be yoshifawful64 in that reblog chain or atalana on discord.16.Do you get butterflies around the person you like?Eenope. I haven’t had a crush (or a squish?) ever.17.Will you get married?At this rate, nope18.When was the last time you smiled?Right now as I laugh at my life choices.19.Does anyone like you?Romantically? Probably not.20.Do you secretly like someone?See #16.21.Who was the first person you talked to today?Does talking to yourself count? No? Darn, uh, probably the bus driver this morning, and after that, the stranger I met outside the terms test hall (aka the chamber of doom).Man I need a social life.22.Who do you feel most comfortable talking to about anything?Nobody tbh i have trust issues but probably my mum, followed by atalana.23.What are you NOT looking forward to?Becoming an adult.24.What ARE you looking forward to?death the end of the world um. Getting into neuroscience? Either that or interstellar travel. There is no inbetween.25.Has someone of the opposite sex ever told you they loved you, and meant it?Romantically? Never. Platonically? Repeatedly. (also does SA count as a person of the opposite sex if they have none, or…?)

26.Suppose you see your ex kissing another person what would you do?What ex?27.Do you plan on moving out within the next year?Technically did, a month ago.28.Are you a forgiving person?Depends how nice I’m feeling on a particular day, but generally yeah.29.How many TRUE friends do you have?Well, you have the shame circle, and I trust them with my life (even though most of us are lowkey suicidal but thaT’S BESIDES THE POINT)

Then you have my mutuals on here, even though our interactions are pretty much just giving enthusiastic thumbs up at each other without talking, which is pretty much the same thing right?30.Do you fall for people easily?See #16.31.Have you ever fallen for your ex’s best friend?See #2632.What’s the last thing you put in your mouth?Pasta, and also water.33.Who was the last person you drove with?….My bus driver? XD34.How late did you stay up last night and why?5am reading fanfic, bc I am not a responsible person.35.If you could move somewhere else, would you?Dunno, really. 36.Who was the last person you took a picture of?Apparently, me. And considering I take nearly no selfies that tells you all you need to know about my camera usage.37.Can you live a day without TV?Yeap38.When was the last time you were extremely disappointed?When I read something really cool, then suddenly, romance without any basis for the sake of romance.39.Three names you go by.Kyiv, Kye, fractalAbomination (and on most things, k1krystal, but i’ve felt a bit disconnected with that name for a while, so)40.Are you currently in a relationship?See #1641.What is your all-time favorite romance movie?Goddamnit.Um. I don’t actually recall the last romance movie I’ve watched. Huh.42.Do you believe that everyone has a soul-mate?Statistically speaking, yes. Practically speaking, no.43.What’s your current problem?Being 16, aro, ace, sex-repulsed, alcohol-repulsed, and introverted in a town with 50% being students who care mostly about partying and all associated activities. Sigh.44.Have you ever had your heart broken?See #1645.Your thoughts of long distance relationships?I think it’s definitely realistic since romance isn’t necessarily about physical contact and such (in fact romances based around the character of a person rather than actual physical attractiveness of a person are probably going to last longer) but apparently most people that experience sexual attraction are willing to go for anybody that they deem attractive even if they’re already in a relationship, so, there’s that.46.How many kids do you want to have?Theoretically 0, but I would be willing to adopt if I had the means to do so? If that makes sense?47.Have you ever found it hard to tell someone you like them? Romantically? ==> #16Platonically? Yeah, because I get anxious that people would see it as flirting especially when it’s not (even if i know that the person in question wouldn’t see it that way), and that just kinda stops me, which is, annoying to say the least :/

[call-me-jmd]

Yes.

the aromantic agenda

x | x | x | x | x | x | x | x | x | x | x

@makelimeade @kiwimuichiro @fallenrain40 @redysetdare @canonically47 @arodabi @drakenhert @pinnakoladda @thisvegetabledoesntfallinlove @midnightcrisisstuff @the-nefarious-vampire