#ahs venable

[stayevildarling]

can i request a fic? i would like one where reader is falling in love with billie and found out she’s in a poly relationship with mina and delia and they slowly falling for reader too

(i love your sarah’s fics, youre so talented)

Billie Dean Howard x Cordelia Goode x Wilhemina Venable x Reader- Say yes to heaven

A/N: thank you very much for requesting this, hope you enjoy🤍

tags/tw: poly relationship, female reader, mention of heartbreak, mention of unrequited love, mention of smoking, hurt/angst/comfort/fluff, very slight nsfw mention at the end

word count: 5.5k

taglist:

@lunaticwhittaker , @billiebeanhoward , @lanawinters-ily , @kenzbro , @minaslittleone , @httpfiftyshadesofgay @whitelotus00 , @ninaahs , @paulsonsratched , @vintagepaulson , @isle-of-earle , @grilledcheeseandguavajelly , @lucyintheskywithxanax , @fanfics4world , @mymiraclewitch , @hazard-to-myself , @awritersometimes , @wastdstime , @p1pecleanerwitheyes , @queen2234 , @ihartnat , @lifebyinez , @ahsatanizgay , @blu3dimples , @stepintomyworld

If anyone would have told you about the turn your life was about to take when you finally decided to quit your toxic job a few months ago, you would have never believed them. It had been undeniably hard, finally accepting the change and moving on from what you assumed to maybe be a job where you can finally settle down. But it had taken everything from you and so you decided to move on, move cities altogether in order to get a fresh start. And when you had seen a job advert online, an assistant job with a decent pay, you decided to go for it, considering you really had nothing to lose at this point.

And so you had moved to New Orleans, welcome for the fresh start and change of seasons, having done all the interviews and the application process online and with a bit of time passing and luck ending up getting the job. Now, you had only after the application process found out you would be working for Ms Billie Dean Howard, medium to the stars with her own tv show. You had heard of her but never having enough time to actually watch her show or learn anything about her really. And so after moving into a hotel close to your new workplace, the housing situation way more complicated than you could have estimated, you began binge watching her show. With every episode, the woman became more likeable, her antics, her sarcasm but yet her abilities and bravery.

One month in and you had performed well, doing your research beforehand, knowing to follow Ms Howard throughout the day, taking care of any incoming phone calls or emails when she is filming, providing her with morning coffee, her lunch smoothie and usual order, varying from two places she liked. Sometimes she needed you to run some personal chores like her dry cleaning or queueing for a new designer bag she wanted as filming stopped her from doing so herself. And you didn‘t mind, knowing this was ultimately what you had applied for and always wanting to work in the movie industry and this somewhat being close to what you initially wanted and dreamed of.

The blonde medium had been nothing but kind to you, always looking you in the eye when talking to you, always knowing her manners when requesting something from you, always adding a please and thank you and meaning it. She was much less than a karen than most of the people in the online forums had wrote and you grew to like her over the first month. She got stressed a lot when filming wasn‘t running like it was supposed to, sometimes going through multiple packets of cigarettes a day and she would make sure to tell her crew off when they messed up but somehow she remained nothing but kind to you, never letting her mood affect her behaviour towards you in any way.

From the first minute you had laid eyes upon the blonde in person you had felt an unfamiliar feeling in your chest, a strange sense of longing for something you had never truly felt before but you brushed it off, focusing on your work instead. But with each passing week, something within you changed, the desire to make her happy, to perform well. Billie was undeniably a flirt, always a pick up line or a joke handy, her wide smile or smirk afterwards complimenting her words perfectly and making something within your stomach twist. But you knew it wasn‘t for you, knew it was simply her antics. But something changed within you when she would often linger her hands on you during a meeting, when her hand would brush against yours as you would pass her a cigarette between filming or how some pet name of endearment would so easily flow from her lips.

You knew you were falling for the blonde, of course not being oblivious to love even if you had maybe been a stranger to it over the past few years. You had the occasional flirt, one night stand but never truly experienced true love, not the book or movie kind. But Billie made you feel, she made your stomach flutter with butterflies, made your hands warm, your voice shaking and your eyes only find hers in a room full of filming crew and even the presence of ghosts nearby. You never felt scared stepping into an abandoned building as Billie made you feel safe, her mere presence enough to ground you and forget about what it was you are truly doing here. And for a little while, you had the feeling that maybe Billie liked you too as her smile eventually grew wider seeing you, the conversations between you two became more personal as she suddenly wanted to know every detail about you, wanting to get to know you outside from the professional standards. She would look at you the way you would look at her and she would undeniably flirt with you, her eyes never leaving yours when sedutively lighting a cigarette or her head on your shoulder as you drove her home after a rough night of filming.

That‘s until you found out she was in a relationship a few days ago. Her office suddenly coated with flowers for a new pickup of her show and you knew this was nothing special with the amount of fans and connections she had but this seemed more personal and when you saw the note sticking out, reading the contents, you figured what you had assumed by now. Billie had never directly mentioned anyone, sometimes giving hints and when you drove her home it was never to her studio apartment given by the company of her show. You had done some research and found out about the academy Billie seems to live in or share a home with someone and stumbled upon the headmistress, connecting the dots as the same name appeared on the note of the flowers. And you sighed, internally shaking your head at how stupid you had been, how you could have possibly fallen in love with your boss, let alone a celebrity who clearly could never be interested in you, having a life of her own while you still lived in the same hotel room from before.

Something changed within you and every day you tried forgetting about this, to push the daydreams and fantasies away, knowing the woman was taken. But you couldn‘t stop thinking about her blonde curls, the signature lipstick, the skirts. Her beautiful smile and how it would light up a room, how her hands would always steady you, how she was so kind despite all the odds and comments online. She was your sun, the thing to keep you going on a long day and making you smile even after returning to the silence and emptiness of your hotel room but now you were alone, forcing yourself to forget these feelings and it felt more lonely than ever before.

And Billie, being Billie she could tell something must have upset you, your usual bubbly personality replaced with something much quieter and drawn back than usual. She could tell you are miles away, still performing your job perfectly but not the friend and reason for her smiling lately that you had been before. She tried to figure it out a few times throughout her busy schedule, never really able to get five minutes to confront you about it. The blonde decided to call you into her office one evening, watching you stand there so sad and almost heartbroken that she couldn‘t quite cope with it. She had asked you over and over, almost begging you to tell her what had upset you so much but you wouldn‘t share, simply stare right past her and into the distance and she left it at that, there not being a whole lot she can do and letting you go for the night.

Now, only moments later when Billie decided to grab her purse and head back for the night, she glanced at the flowers and note which you had been staring at all along, at first assuming it was the windows. And thats when Billie finally connected the dots, your interest before, your obvious acknowledgment of her flirting and your shyness around her when it suddenly stopped around the time the flowers from Cordelia and Wilhemina arrived at her office. She sighs, as she makes her way home, thinking about a way she could fix this, undeniably caring about you and wanting nothing other than to see you happy, never wanting to see you so distant and sad like you had been the last few days.

When she returns home, both of her girlfriends, immediately notice over dinner that Billie was miles away, Cordelia gently taking her hand and encouraging her to open what had been bothering her for days now. And Billie was much more open compared to you, sharing her worries and what had happend, her two girlfriends listening intently. The medium hadn‘t stopped talking about you since you began working for her, telling them all about you, how she was fascinated by you and the two of them could tell she had grown a liking towards you as Billie never usually gushed about anyone like that, having been nothing but loyal in this relationship so far and changing her earlier antics in life especially when it comes to love and relationships.

The three of them had met through Billie‘s work, her and the headmistress of Miss Robichaux‘s Academy having made a few brief encounters before as well as Cordelia and Wilhemina from their past. A mutual dinner reunited them and introduced Billie to Wilhemina and after some months, one thing led to another and ever since then they had been official, sharing a home and their lives together, despite their respective and demanding careers. „Why don‘t we invite her over for dinner? I would love to get to know her“ Cordelia encourages, having made enough eye contact with Wilhemina to have the redheads consent as she equally had grown curious about the girl that Billie kept talking about.

„You‘re sure?“ Billie asks, both excitedly but also a little nervous which rarely happened with the medium. „What if she finds this weird?“ the blonde asks, abandoning their gazes. „Why darling? because she has a big crush on you and the feeling is mutual“ Wilhemina smirks, having been with the two of them long enough to see life a little more easier and casual than years before when she first met them and still carried the burdens that her life had put on her. „You know I would never-„ Billie begins but Cordelia shakes her head, squeezing her hand a little tighter. „We know love, but you both seem to care about each other and I really want to meet her if she feels comfortable“ the supreme encourages and Billie simply nods, smiling to herself a little before moving on with her evening.

The next day carries on it it‘s usual rhythm, picking up your bosses coffee order, before working on some emails and phone calls, arranging some meetings for Billie‘s promo tour before picking up her lunch order and following her around for the rest of the day while she is filming. Only in the evening, the two of you manage to actually talk as everyone had left for the night as Billie goes over her emails one more time while smoking a cigarette. „Is there anything else I can assist you with?“ you ask with your notebook neatly wrapped in your hand as you slip inside her office. „Yes darling, what are you doing on friday night?“ she asks curiously, as she stops the typing on her computer. The nickname sends you right into a spiral but you choose to ignore it, before furrowing your eyebrows. „Nothing, did I miss anything on the filming schedule?“ you ask wondering why she may need you to work late.

„Would you be free for dinner?“ she asks curiously, causing your cheeks to glow red as you sigh. „Billie-„ you begin but she cuts you off as she stands from her chair, abandoning her cigarette in a nearby ashtray. „Look I know that you saw these“ she points towards the flowers, getting straight to the point. „But it‘s a little more complicated than that.“ she explains but you shake your head, not in the mood for what she is about to suggest. „Look Ms. Howard, I‘m sorry but I can‘t do what you are asking me to. I can‘t go on a date with you while you are in a relationship“ you blurt out, missing the little smirk creeping up on her features. „Darling, I‘m not asking you on a date“ she clarifies, causing your cheeks to burn hot in embarrassment. Your mouth forms into an „o“ shape before she puts you out of your misery.

„It is true, I‘m in a relationship with two women but I like you and I have told them about you and they would like to get to know you, no date, just get to know my best assistant so far“ she clarifies and you try and look away, trying to cover both your embarrassment and the arousal at her mentioning two women instead of one, having been unsure of her exact sexuality so far and only assuming from your research. „Is that something you would like?“ she asks and despite your inner self screaming at you to decline, you find yourself nodding your head, causing her wide smile to spread across her features before her heels tap excitedly on the floor. „Great, 8pm and you know the adress of the academy?“ she questions and you nod before you both head home for the night.

Friday came much quicker as you had never really calculated how it was already wednesday when she asked and suddenly you find yourself in front of the large black iron gates, shortly after the front door, your palms sweaty, heart racing through your chest and your fist hovering above the door, too shy to knock, considering whether to simply run away and start a new life somewhere. But before you could even think about it further, the front door opens and the woman you had seen when doing your research stands before you, blonde hair just like Billie but longer, fuller and richer. Her aura is breathtaking, she is wearing some long flowy black pants, some boots and a blouse with some flowers. The scent of both cooking and vanilla and honey instantly greet you and you stand there shocked for a moment as if an angel had just greeted you to heaven.

„Hi there“ she greets you with a bright smile that could turn even your darkest of days brighter. „You must be Y/N, please come in“ she offers and you snap out of it, smiling politely before thanking her. „I‘m Cordelia and this is Miss Robichaux‘s Academy“ she explains as she leads you past the living room and into the kitchen with a large dining space. Inside the kitchen you are greeted with a largely decorated table, some flowers and enough wine on the table to last for several days. The scent of whoever‘s cooking this is makes your mouth water and you only then notice another presence in the room, still not Billie but you catch a glimpse of her smoking outside which was typical for your boss. „This is Wilhemina Venable“ Cordelia introduces you before she walks away to take care of the cooking for a moment longer.

„Hi, it‘s so nice to meet you, I‘m Y/N“ you introduce yourself, again forcing yourself to snap out of this and remain polite. The woman with red hair stands, holding onto a cane as she takes your hand, her eyes searching yours for a moment. Again you are taken back by her hair, the lilac coating her features and how she seemed different than the two, more mysterious, more private but yet inviting and strangely safe. You hold onto her hand way too long before you snap out of it, Billie‘s presence finally causing you to let go of the woman‘s hand. „Hi“ she beams, ushering you to sit before she pours everyone some wine and hands you a glass. „You aren‘t allergic to anything are you, darling?“ Cordelia asks and you shake your head before she begins serving you and you nervously take a rather large sip of wine, trying to calm your nerves a little bit.

Dinner begins casual and you are so glad about that, being able to get used to their intimidating presences despite their friendliness. But being around three gorgeous woman, one you undeniably had a crush on made you more nervous than you could ever admit. They begin to talk casually about their day, including you before they begin asking you some questions, enough to learn more about you but not enough to make you uncomfortable or make this seem like an interview. Cordelia asks about your upbringing, Billie wanting to know more about your profession and career before working for her and Wilhemina more curious about the things you enjoy, occasionally teasing how you managed to stay Billie‘s assistant for the last few months as she undeniably was demanding, which made Billie scoff but the rest of you three chuckle.

„So tell me, where do you live if you are new to New Orleans?“ Cordelia asks curiously and Billie nods then, only now having realized she had no idea where you lived or how far you had to commute to work every day. You suddenly pause, your bubbly and open conversation from before now a little more shy which doesn‘t go unnoticed by them. „I live nearby the office“ you explain, taking another sip of wine, not really wanting to get into that. „Which area?“ Wilhemina asks curiously, having noticed your uncomfortable posture but wanting to draw the answer from you nevertheless. „I live in a hotel“ you admit, knowing there was no point in denying this, especially after learning one of these woman is a witch and could probably for all you know read your thoughts and worse.

„What?“ Billie blurts out in shock, almost choking on her wine. „Why is that sweetie?“ Cordelia asks curiously, already so used to your presence that she never even realized the pet name. „When I moved here and even before I spent every hour of every day trying to find something but someone always beat me to it and so I had to choose between this mouldy basement or a hotel nearby and so I opted for that“ you admit, feeling a little embarrassed considering how the three of them had their lives together so well and yet here you are living in a hotel. „Why didn‘t you say anything?“ Billie asks almost a little furiously, before shaking her head disapprovingly. Cordelia glances at Wilhemina, the two of them always seeming to share the same thoughts. „We have plenty of rooms if you need“ she offers but you shake your head. „Oh I couldn‘t but thank you“ you explain.

„Well I have plenty of contacts so remind me on monday and we will find something“ Billie encourages before the redhead changes the subject which you are glad about, this having taken you off guard a little and undeniably making you feel a little shy and embarrassed. After some more desert and wine and hours of talking in the comfort of each other- which you never thought possible when walking into this place hours before- you are finally ready to head home. Billie parts ways with a hug, telling you how glad she is you could make it. Wilhemina gives you a friendly hand shake and Cordelia just opts to hug you before reassuring a million times that you could still drive and didn‘t need a taxi or help getting home. They made you promsie to text Billie when you are home safe and you agreed.

By the time you collapse into bed, sending your boss a quick text that you had made it home safely, your whole world feels upside down. Not only have you just had dinner with your boss who you had been falling for but also her not one but TWO girlfriends who are more gorgeous than the other. You couldn‘t shake the still lingering attraction towards Billie, how interesting Wilhemina was and how Cordelia was undeniably the sun. All evening, you had forced yourself to push the lingering thoughts away but as you lay in your bed staring at the ceiling, you can‘t help but think a little further about those three, wondering about their dynamics and thinking about how lucky they are to have found each other, knowing you would have to push your feelings for Billie away now, seeing her in a healthy and happy relationship with those two amazing women.

And so in the next few weeks you decide to move on with your life, focusing more on yourself outside of work, rather than cry at silly romantic movies after working and thinking of her. Of course you still felt for her but you wanted her to be happy but somehow you had made that bet without them. They invited you over for dinner more, feeling bad you had to eat on your own in that hotel, Cordelia showing you more around the academy and slowly revealing her witchcraft to you, which had you stunned. Wilhemina enjoyed the more quieter side of it all and after she had discovered your love for books, she often invited you to her private library within the coven, showing you original pieces that you had wanted to read for ages, allowing you to borrow whatever you may need, knowing you will always bring them back to her. And Billie would take you out outside of work more, brunches, breakfast, walks with her two girlfriends on the weekend.

After a few months of this, you finally felt like belonging somewhere, they had taken you in, always offering to let you sleep over at the coven and you accepted sometimes, especially after long movie nights with them or when having dinner and drinking way too much after and giggling until the late hours of the night with them. Eventually they knew everything about you, your passions, the things that made you smile, make you frown and make you cry. And you knew everything about them, Billie's courage and her obsession with shopping, which you had known before but after seeing her walk in wardrobe you realised the extent. You knew every detail about Cordelia, her upbringing, her witchcraft and how powerful she truly was, having shown you her magic more than once now, the two of you liking spending time in the greenhouse together. And Wilhemina had been bruised and beaten by life, her condition often causing her so much pain and you admired her courage, never having seen her sad before, never complaining and remaining strong despite life's challenges.

And until lately, you had been so caught up in the daze of it all, working for Billie and spending most of your free time with them that you never really realised how they would look at you. How Wilhemina would glance at you when you watched a movie together and how every single word coming out of your mouth was true perfection. How Cordelia's hands would so often linger on you, the feeling so safe and comforting that you never questioned it to begin with. And at last there was Billie who was ready to give you the entire world, her eyes sparkling in that same way when she had met Cordelia and Wilhemina. Maybe it was due to the type of their relationship, never thinking about them adding another person, let alone knowing whether that could work, but you had been so oblivious to it all and never noticed how just like you, they had been slowly falling for you.

It was late one night when you all had drank too much wine, Billie standing outside, the moonlight illuminating her features as she giggled and struggled to light her cigarette and you gladly assisted her, giggling alongside her. She suddenly got serious, looking at you with an expression that you didn't notice due to your state. ,,How come you don't have a special someone in your life?'' she asked out of the blue and you simply shrugged, unsure how to answer her question. ,,Have you ever considered looking beyond societies relationship standards?'' she asked but the two of you had been interrupted by Cordelia before you could answer and it never struck you all that much until a few weeks later.

The three of them noticed their mutual liking to you, instantly realising how well you fit with them, how your presence only completed them each in their own way and they couldn't hide the attraction towards you any longer. And so they had a long conversation about this, never having thought about adding another person and worrying what that may do to the nature of their relationship but they had talked it out, each of them just as willing and truly just as in love with you. And so they had asked you for dinner again, this time not at the academy but a place that they chose. And when you looked up the place and seeing how fancy it was, you know you needed to look presentable and so you had spent all day, dressing up for them, doing an extensive everything shower and adjusting yourself in order to remotely match their class and beauty.

,,Hop in babydoll'' Billie smiled as she pulled up in her car, Wilhemina and Cordelia meeting you there. ,,Wow'' she smiled as you sat beside her and she could get a proper look at you. ,,You look beautiful'' she praised, causing your cheeks to blush. And tonight was the first night where you couldn't be oblivious any longer to your own feelings. Seeing the three of them sitting beside and opposite you at dinner, the classy atmosphere only adding to their beauty. You couldn't deny how beautiful Wilhemina looked in her lilac dress, how Cordelia's smile lit up the whole restaurant and how undeniably attractive Billie looked tonight and how all sorts of thoughts linger on your mind. You had been clouded by finally feeling life and it's beauty in the last few months that only tonight you seem to realise your feelings for each one of them and the realisation startles you mid dinner, causing their voices to suddenly be muffled, your heart beating out of your chest and fighting the urge to cry, realising you could never have what they have.

Cordelia is the first one to notice, seeing your features drop, from the comfortable chatter and your smile, suddenly seeming so lost in your thoughts and her eyebrows furrow in that all too familiar way. ,,Darling, are you alright?'' she asks and despite them having used all sorts of pet names on you, tonight again you only seem to realise properly as it stings when you hear it leave her mouth. ,,I'm fine'' you muster up your best smile, focusing on your meal and engaging in their conversations in order to get through the night. And despite Cordelia's rule to never invade anyone's thoughts, your thoughts seem to linger on her mind as she hears your doubts, feels the sadness radiating off her and she glances at Wilhemina and Billie before giving them a signal. They had planned to bring this up with you tonight, planning to do it much later which causes the redhead and blonde some confusion but the supreme insists.

,,Y/N.. we meant to talk to you about something'' Cordelia begins before your attention focuses towards her, placing your knife and fork down as you had just finished your meal. ,,Of course'' you give her your attention, suddenly feeling the nerves at the seriousness of her tone. ,,We are so glad that Billie decided to introduce you to us darling, we really enjoy your company and we hope you feel the same'' she smiles and you return the smile before agreeing ,,Of course I do''. There is some silence before their eyes meet each other, unsure who was going to do the next part but Wilhemina takes over. ,,Now, we all know how you feel about Ms. Howard over here'' she smirks, causing your cheeks to burn red a little as it had become a bit of a joke between the four of you. ,,But if we aren't wrong, we think you may feel the same about us, little one?'' she asks, so gentle, so carefully as if you are the most fragile thing on the planet.

For a second your words get caught in your throat, feeling yours nerves but Billie's hands, who sits beside you, find yours underneath the table, holding it in place and making you feel safe. ,,Would it be bad if I do?'' you ask carefully, almost whispering, hoping you aren't reading this wrong and knowing you owe them honesty. ,,Quite the opposite babydoll'' Billie reassures, almost beaming at you a little before she carries on. ,,We like your company and to be honest, the three of us are a little crazy about you'' she admits and Cordelia and Wilhemina simply chuckle at Billie's word choice, despite the truth in it. ,,And we have talked this through for a while now, if you feel the same, we..'' she carries on but suddenly stops, unsure how to actually finish this sentence in order not to overwhelm you.

,,All Billie darling is trying to say is we like you a lot sweetie and if you feel the same way, we'd be so happy to explore this with you, see where it goes and welcome you into our home and hearts'' Cordelia finishes, her eyes slightly shining with tears, already knowing how you feel inside and hoping sincerly they aren't overwhelming you with this. And suddenly you sit there, your beautiful boss medium to the stars holding your hand with her two gorgeous partners as they offer you the world. Everything you had secretly wanted, every feeling you had been pushing down and pretended just simply didn't exist. They had been welcoming you into their lives months ago without question. spending their time and effort on you, and right now they are offering you the world and it causes you to freeze for a moment, unable to believe this isn't one of your dreams at night or even daydreams.

Your eyes meet both Cordelia and Wilhemina's, making sure they aren't kidding or messing with you but the honesty in their eyes and the glimmer of hope only confirms their statements from before. ,,All you have to say is yes to trying little one'' Wilhemina encourages, knowing this must be scary. ,,We will take it at your pace'' Cordelia encourages. And suddenly you smirk, unable to hide how you are truly feeling for a moment longer. ,,Yes'' you confirm and they all sigh in relief a little, Billie squeezing your hand a little tighter. ,,How about some champagne or dessert to celebrate?'' the medium offers and you suddenly find yourself glancing at her with an expression neither of them can quite make out. You lean in, your shy side suddenly gone, not able to hold this back any longer and wanting to feel what you had wanted for months now. Neither Cordelia or Wilhemina can quite make out what you are whispering in the mediums ear but from her both shocked and surprised reaction, they can only guess.

,,Right, seems like we are getting the bill and celebrating at home'' she reassures, coughing a little from your boldness and Wilhemina can't help but smirk, having assumed there was this side to you, having seen your lingering gaze on Billie's ass whenever she swayed her hips, seeing the way you look at Cordelia and herself and knowing exactly what you wanted, hence your choice of dress tonight. ,,Alright, let's take you home then little one'' the redhead confirms. And so within months your world had turned upside down, the job advert saving your life quite literally and giving you anything you could have ever wanted and dreamed of and so much more. And tonight you didn‘t hold back anymore, didn‘t hide your true feelings and let go, saying yes to them, saying yes to what you knew was going to be heaven.

[iamnotoriginalphil]

Your Mina (Wilhemina Venable x f!Reader)

Synopsis: The world has ended and not just due to the missiles. Your Mina is gone, the cold Ms Venable left in her place. If only you didn't still want her.

Words: 6.3k

Warnings: degradation kink, humiliation kink, mentions of possessiveness, mentions of exhibition, swearing, thigh riding, chocking, jealousy, BDSM themes, objectification

The end of the world hadn’t been what you were expecting. It hadn’t been a slow build to something, climate change not the cause. Missiles, as the news announced, felt so stark and impersonal in the face of the death they wrought. You hadn’t even had the chance to feel the fear or the loss or the anxiety before hands had clasped around your arms and you were being escorted into a massive SUV.

Kicking and screaming brought blank stares, no one bothering to step in. Tears were running down your face but you were hardly the only one. The missiles were on the way and you were just another person facing this overwhelming truth. The world was ending and you were being kidnapped.

You would never get the chance to kiss your girlfriend goodbye.

You were bundled underground, into some kind of bunker built for the rich and powerful. You tried, over and over again, to tell them that they had the wrong person. You weren’t rich. You weren’t powerful. You were nothing and no one.

In a room, questions unanswered, you were left to stew. Firelight licked up the walls, shadows dancing, putting you on edge. You saw no one else, alone, the silence uncaring as you screamed at them to let you go. When the screaming ran out, tears fell down your cheeks. It was beginning to sink in just how alone you truly were. There must be other people in whatever place it was, but your family was gone, your girlfriend, your friends, everyone you’d ever known. They were all gone and you remained.

It was a cruel mistake.

You sunk into a chair eventually, curling up in it. Time was moving but you couldn’t feel it, the numb feeling growing in your chest. Your life had changed and you weren’t sure you wanted it. You wanted your life back or to have perished with everyone you loved. Not whatever this was.

The tears stopped. The numb feeling grew. You stared into the fire, wondering when it would consume your body. At some point, you knew, it would.

You ignored the sound of approaching footsteps. Your chin rested on your knees, arms curled around bent legs, staring at the flames until they were all you could see. No one could make it better. Of that you were sure.

A sharp tap of a cane on the floor had you stiffening. Their cruelty knew no bounds. You squeezed your eyes shut, refusing to let any more tears fall. They weren’t going to break you, no matter what this torture was. Maybe you had died and this was hell.

Another sharp tap of the cane so much closer and you half turned your head towards the sound. Your eyes scanned up from shoes hidden under a long dress, a dark cane held in pale hands. Your heart gave a small flutter. The further up, the more familiar the figure standing in the doorway was becoming.

Dark eyes were staring at you from a mask like face. Hair you’d once run your fingers through was pinned up. Lips you knew the taste of were pressed into a thin line. Your mouth grew dry.

“Mina,” you breathed, rising from your seat.

You couldn’t believe it. She was standing there, right in front of you, looking none the worse for wear. She was perfect. Your heart was thudding in your chest, loud in your ears, and she was right there. You could touch her, if you just reached out, because she. Was. Right. There.

“You will call me Ms Venable.” Her voice was so cold.

“But-“

Her hand shot out, open palm striking your skin. You gaped at her, the sting bringing tears to your eyes. She was staring at you, daring you to argue and you didn’t know what was happening. This wasn’t your Mina. Your hand trembled as you raised it, lightly touching the skin that bore her handprint.

“Yes Ms Venable,” you whispered, not even aware you were doing it.

Your eyes focused on your feet, your breathing shallow, the sting of her slap still echoing through your body. The end of the world had taken her from you, but not through death, through transformation. Pushing the tears back once again, you caught your lower lip between your teeth, biting down until the coppery tang of blood bloomed on your tongue.

“Welcome to Outpost Three,” Ms Venable said, and her voice was so familiar it hurt.

“Thank you,” you said.

“As a Purple you’ll be supplied a furnished suite,” she said.

Your eyes flashed up, purple meaning something more than whatever she was suggesting.

“Purple?” you asked.

“One of the elite.” Her voice practically purred and your entire body felt like a live wire, “come.”

You moved on shuffling feet, following behind her as she walked with such confidence. You had no idea when she’d been shown this place. She’d never spoken of it, never even hinted at something like it. All those years together and not once had this ever entered into your life. Until the end of the world.

The end of the world she knew about?

She explained the rules to you, your arms slowly tightening around your body. None of it felt real. None of it was reasonable. You’d stepped into a world where nothing made sense and nothing was okay. Your Mina was gone and yet was also standing right there.

Standing there but different. Your Mina would never wear black, purple the colour she wore at all times. You didn’t like it. She never wore her hair so pinned up, so severe. While you could appreciate how it showed off the long line of her neck and the cut of her jaw, the sway of her hair had been a constant in your life. At least the scent of lavender seemed to cling to her, not quite hidden. Yours gaze slid over her body, finding her more a stranger than was comfortable.

You stepped through the door she indicated into your suite, should brushing against hers. That familiar scent of lavender lingered in the air of the room. You breathed in deeply, eyes slipping closed for a moment, letting yourself imagine for a moment that the world hadn’t changed so drastically. You turned, looking at her, eyes sweeping over someone that once had been as familiar to you as your own reflection.

“I don’t understand,” you said.

“Which part?” Cruelty was the flavour of her voice.

“All of it. I mean, I know about the missiles but why am I here? I’m not anyone,” you asked.

For the first time, something in her eyes seemed to break apart and hastily be put back together again.

“You must have been important to someone in power,” she said, “if you find yourself so inconsequential.”

You looked at her, really looked at her. You’d woken that morning to her already having left the house. There was a vague memory of lips pressed to your forehead before rolling over. There’d been no note, not indication anything was going to be different. You’d slept last night with her warmth beside you, arms around you, breathing in time with one another. Now… now she was so far from the bed you’d once shared and you had no idea how to get back to it.

“I suppose so,” you replied, voice soft, letting her have the out she was looking for, “thank you, Ms Venable.”

She gave you a short nod before turning on her heels and walking away, the tap of her cane lingering long after she was gone.

The closing door was quiet and so was the sigh that passed over your lips. You didn’t know what to do with yourself. The world had ended but Mina was still there with you. But different. Not your Mina. Ms Venable. Not the woman who would come home at the end of the day and slip into the bath with you, but something new. Someone you’d never known before.

You wandered through the suite. It was plush, expensive, nicer than the home you’d shared with Mina. You didn’t know what to do with it. The world had ended and you were living in luxury. You couldn’t wrap your mind around it.

In the large closet, purple stared back at you from every corner. You ran your fingers of the materials, finding that each item was beautiful. Each one was perfect. Someone had put a lot of thought into curating the wardrobe you were to have in the end days. You shook your head, not sure what to do with that information. None of it was making any sense to you.

You were slow to dress and by the time you found your way to the dining room, it looked as if you were the last to join them. Mina was sitting at the head of the table. You couldn’t look at her, not without a wound in your chest opening up again. You felt the weight of the other gazes on you, not looking up from the hands clasped in your lap.

One weighed heavier than the others.

You’d dressed carefully, in the dress you thought shed’d like the most on you. It was soft, delicate, almost romantic. You couldn’t bare facing her only to be met with disdain. It had been a message that you would do what she wished to please her.

You’d keep to whatever role she was placing you in. Just sharing the same space as her would have to be enough in your new reality. You could be perfect for her, if that’s what she needed from you. Even now, when she wasn’t your Mina, you’d still do whatever you could for her.

Thank god your therapist hadn’t survived the end of the world or she’d have a lot to say about that.

You kept your interactions with the other Purples to a minimum. You found them insipid at the best of times, and you craved the attention of only one person in the entire Outpost. Instead, you watched the way she terrorised them. She stalked the halls, doling out discipline as she saw fit, lurking in the shadows just to catch them breaking the rules. The joy she seemed to get from it seemed so different from the woman you’d known on the outside, and yet you’d seen glimmers of it sometimes. On her worst days, mostly.

You didn’t find it any less intriguing, though. You might have been willing to play along with her facade of being nothing but strangers, but you still noticed that left you with less of her attention than the others. It might have been bad attention, but at least it was attention. You craved it, like it was the air you breathed. Where once the weight of her gaze ws comforting and familiar, now it felt exciting in its scarceness.

And then there was Ms Mead. Her right hand, her confidant, her trusted advisor. A kernel of jealousy curled behind your ribs, hissing in your ears that you’d been replaced. That she didn’t need you anymore. That she didn’t want you.

So you decided to do something drastic if only to prove to yourself that you were still burrowed in her heart.

It was slow, not wanting her to catch on before you were ready. You took your time, inching towards the group of Purples day by day until you were sitting with their group, listening to them talk. No one questioned it, no one pointed out you’d spent months ignoring them, now seeking them out.

Gallant was the first to notice your sarcastic comments, muttered under your breath. Catching your eye whenever Coco said something, a shared smile, the sting of friendship was surprisingly painful after months kept to yourself. He would sit beside you, the two of you sharing barbs.

If Mina noticed the change, she didn’t show it.

So you amped it up. You whispered with Mallory in dark corners, you complimented Coco loudly, you shared smiles with Dinah. In short, you did all you could to show her she no longer had your attention either. That you’d moved on. That if she didn’t want you then you weren’t going to sit around waiting for her forever.

Her eyes began to trail you throughout the twisting halls of the outpost.

One more turn of the cog. Standing in your wardrobe, the handpicked clothes for you by the woman who knew you better than anyone, you considered each one with a critical eye. Yes, the one in the far corner, tucked away as if she hadn’t wanted you to find it. That was the one.

The lavender slip dress was silk, so soft against your skin. Clinging to your figure, a cowl neckline and slit up to your thigh, it was sexier than anything else you’d worn, nothing like the Victorian inspired fashion you’d grown used to. But she had left it for you and it felt like a challenge.

You pinned your hair up, not as sever as her, softer, more romantic. You looked in the mirror, doing your best to effect the wide eyed look of innocence you knew you’d need to sell the whole ideal. Give her something to ruin.

You waited, just long enough to know you would be the last to sit down to dinner. Not late, but on the cusp. Stepping into the dining room, it was like a slow wave, faces turning to you, only one looking less than pleased.

You took your usual seat beside Gallant, ignoring the one woman you were trying so hard for. Some eyes were still lingering on you, Coco to be exact, and she looked put out at your appearance.

“Nice dress,” Gallant said, leaning towards you but in the quiet room his voice carried.

“Thank you,” you said, smoothing one hand over your thighs, “I found it in my room and thought why not? No point wasting something so pretty.”

Your eyes looked past him, finding Ms Venable watching you. There was fire in her eyes and you didn’t fail to notice the way her fingers clenched on the head of her cane. With a small smile you turned your face away, looking down at the gelatinous cube on your plate. Hardly your favourite meal but given it was the only one in existence you’d take it.

Your dragged your eyes up again, Coco looking at you with a cocked head. You offered her a wink, smirking at her. It wasn’t so much a feeling as a shift in the atmosphere. A tap of the cane on the ground, your thighs clenching together.

The meal was as unsatisfying as ever. Well, the food was. The eyes that you kept drawing to yourself were not. Arching your back, your neck, letting your fingers trail over your collarbone, laughing softly in Gallant’s ear, letting your teeth sink into your lower lip. You were using all the tricks that had once worked on her. The tricks that also led to you pinned to the mattress moaning her name.

No one said you had to play fair.

Once the meal was over, you slid your arm through Gallant’s, letting your hips sway, not bothering to offer a parting look to the woman who still owned your heart. He escorted you into the library, the infernal song making you purse your lips.

“So tell me,” he murmured under the cover of Coco’s complaints, “who’s benefit is this little number for?”

“I don’t know what you mean,” you replied, smiling at him, letting him know you were lying.

“You do know sex is strictly forbidden,” he said.

“Who said anything about sex?” you laughed, “nothing wrong with being desired.”

“Did you really find this dress in your wardrobe?” he asked.

“Would you believe my answer if I said yes?”

“Not for a moment,” he replied, “but whoever it is, they’re going to find you hard to resist.”

You sat in the corner of the sofa closest to the fire. The light, flickering over your skin, would be temptation in itself. Gallant seated himself beside you, his eyes scanning over the room, most likely trying to ferret out which of the other Purples you were trying to seduce. The woman moving through the room, taking her position with her back to the fire, was ignored by him. You smiled down into your lap before looking up at her. The glare you received in return was nasty.

You only stayed long enough to not raise suspicions. You squeezed Gallant’s shoulder as you left, getting an indulgent smile in return. The air in your room was stale and yet it continued to hold notes of lavender, even so many months later. You sat on your bed, face turned towards the door.

She didn’t leave you waiting long.

The knock on your door was perfunctory. You were slow to rise, wanting her to wait. Pulling the door open you didn’t have the chance to say anything before a hand was curling around your throat and pushing back into the room. Your hand snapped up, fingers curling around the delicate wrist, but you didn’t try to pull it from you. The door closed quietly behind her.

“You have been making a spectacle of yourself,” she said, squeezing.

“And you’ve been enjoying the show,” you shot back, breathless and hoarse.

She snarled, throwing you back. You stumbled, doing your best not to trip over your own feet. She advanced, slow and steady, each tap of the cane making you lose a little more of your breath. Her eyes swept over your body, looking less than impressed with what she found.

“You think too highly of yourself and your little display,” she said.

You took a step into her personal space, feeling her familiar warmth wash over your exposed skin. Her eyes darted down your body again, lingering on your lips for a moment before meeting yours. You pulled those lips up into a smirk, leaning forward.

“And I think you look at me and remember exactly what I sound like when I orgasm on your tongue,” you murmured.

“Insolence,” she growled, “your base desires are nothing of my concern.”

“Once they were only your concern,” you said, stepping back from her, “but I suppose you’re right. Someone else might want that job now.”

“No one will ever have that job,” she hissed.

“Yes yes, I know. No unauthorised sexual intercourse,” you said, rolling your eyes, enjoying the hint of jealousy in her voice.

Your hand slowly skimmed up your body, lingering on one breast. Her eyes zeroed in on it, darkening in a way that felt familiar. You brushed a thumb over a hardening nipple, a little gasp your only response.

“That doesn’t stop me fantasising about you every night with my fingers knuckle deep inside my pussy.”

Her throat bobbled.

“I used to just remember how it was. You, me, our bed or our bath or our kitchen counter,” you said as you pinched your nipple through the silk of your dress, “but then I got creative. Rather than Mina I had Ms Venable. Disciplining me. Tying me up. Bruising me. Choking me. Degrading me. I found I rather liked those fantasies.”

“You disgust me,” she growled.

“Then why are you thinking about using me for your own pleasure?”

Her eyes darkened and you saw her jaw clench. You knew her, better than you knew yourself. She’d never been good at hiding what she wanted from you, especially when what she wanted was you. You made small noise in the back of your throat as you tugged on your nipple, eyes fluttering closed at the shot of pleasure to your core.

A hand curled around your throat again, forcing you backwards until your back hit the wall. You didn’t bother opening your eyes, rolling your nipple, her name a soft exhalation. Lips brushed the shell of your ear and the scent of lavender curled around you.

“You’re nothing but a dirty whore ruled by your own animal instincts,” she growled in your ear.

“Uh huh,” you hummed, her words lighting your blood on fire. She’d never been one for this before, when it was sweet and soft and full of reassurances. You were having fun exploring this side of her.

“Pathetic,” she snarled, “do you really think this will end well for you?”

“I think it’ll end well for you,” you all but gasped, “you know how good I am with my tongue.”

Her fingers tightened around your throat, cutting off your air supply. Your back arched into your own touch, her warmth brushing against your bare skin. Your eyes opened, finding her watching you, teeth biting into her bottom lip. You lent into her hold, eyes focused on that lip, wanting to bite it until you tasted her blood.

“You want me to use you?” she hissed, “would that bring you pleasure?”

You nodded, watching her lips form the words. You could still remember what they felt like against your skin. They curled up into a cruel smirk.

“On your knees, slut.”

With the hand around your neck she forced you down. You looked up at her from under your lashes, tongue dragging along your lower lip. She let you go, stepping back. With careful movements she set her cane aside, sitting on the edge of your bed. She crooked a finger at you.

You crawled across the floor on hands and knees, practically panting at the thought of getting your mouth on her after so many months. She raised her foot, pressing it against your shoulder, holding you back, heel digging in painfully.

“You think you deserve to touch me?” she asked, raising an eyebrow.

“I do,” you said, not even having to think about, “name one person who knows your body better than me. Name someone who can make you feel as good as I can.”

“Whose to say I haven’t found someone here?” she asked. That same jealousy curled in your gut, whispering in your ear, telling you Ms Mead had replaced you. She didn’t need you.

“Let me prove it,” you begged, surprised by how much you needed it.

“And what have you done to earn the honour?” she asked, “you choose to debase yourself in front of me. You flaunt your body as if that will impress me. You associate with degenerates and air heads. You are nothing and you will never amount to more than nothing.”

“Please,” you breathed, “please let me do this for you.”

Her foot dropped from your shoulder. You crawled forward again, unhindered. You stopped between her feet, dragging your eyes up her body. She was staring down at you, those dark eyes unimpressed but so intent on you.

Your hands skimmed up her calves, finding bare skin under your fingers. You pushed her skirt up, admiring the line of her leg. Your brought your lips to her right leg, finally touching her soft skin, tongue darting out to taste her. So familiar and yet so different.

“Hurry this up,” she growled, “I have places to be.”

“Yes, Ms Venable,” you said, lips brushing her skin.

Her legs parted further, giving you room to continue your exploration up her legs. She was still watching you, hands resting on your comforter, eyes darkening as your fingers slid over her knees. Your nose skimmed along her inner thigh before your breath caught.

Mina had always splurged on nice lingerie. It had been one of those things you’d loved. Silk and lace and satin. Always in shades of purple. She seemed to get a kick out of each new one revealed to you, the way your eyes would widen before you wouldn’t be able to keep your hands off her. She planned it to perfection, each reveal making your head spin and desire pool between your legs.

If you’d considered the opportunity for lingerie in the Outpost, it was usually drawn from your imagination, your desire of what you’d like to see Mina in. In reality, you expected something functional, perfunctory, much like you’d found in your own wardrobe. Functional over aesthetic. Basic and simple, serving a purpose beyond stoking desire.

What you hadn’t expected was for her to forego underwear altogether.

Right there, easily accessible, her centre was glistening in the firelight. Fingers tangled in your hair, tugging until a sharp pain in your skull caught your attention. You tipped your head back, finding her staring at you.

“Problem?” she asked, raising an eyebrow.

Her act of indifference might have worked better if you couldn’t see the effect you’d already had on her. Her fingers tightened in your hair again, pulling past the point of pleasure.

“No, Ms Venable,” you replied, lowering your eyes back to her pretty pussy.

The hand on the back of your head forced you forward, headfirst where she wanted you most.

“Then get to work. Prove to me you’re the best slut I have on offer.”

Your tongue darted out, licking through her folds. The fingers in your hair tightened again. You did it again, revelling in her taste. You’d missed it, more than you’d realised. You hummed, eyes closing as you treasured the moment, tongue delving deeper. You wanted her taste on your tongue forever.

When you ghosted over her clit her fingers clenched. You did it again, wanting to feel the pull. The sharp pain was making your legs feel like jelly. You hadn’t thought that would be something you liked, but then you hadn’t thought you’d like this new Mina before you’d met her. But she was fun, opening up a whole new world of exploration for you.

You let your lips wrap around it, slow to suck. She forced your head harder against her, grinding against you. Your tongue flicked out, determined to hear her moan. The sound of it haunted your dreams. You craved it. You yearned for it. It would fulfil your dreams.

She kept silent.

Your arms hooked around her thighs, keeping them open as you pressed closer in. Your tongue lapped at her, circling her bundle of nerves, feeling her hips rise to meet you. You hummed again, tongue thrusting into her. Her legs pressed in, ignoring your hold on them, contracting around your head.

“Fucking whore,” she hissed, “so desperate for me. It’s pitiful. You disgust me.”

You tried to plunge further in, wanting her to feel you. Your nose bumped against her clit. She forced your head forward, grinding against you, uncaring of how you might be feeling. Your tongue was working hard, thrusting into her, setting a pace that you weren’t sure you could keep up. You looked up, watching the way her face contorted in pleasure. Her lips fell open in a silent moan, eyes closing. You stroked at her internal walls.

“I’m sure I’m your favourite taste. You’d stay there on your knees all day if I’d let you lick at me like a desperate little whore. Would you service me whenever I asked?” You knew you would.

You pulled your tongue from within her, wrapping your lips around her clit. You prised your fingers from her thigh, replacing your tongue, pushing them in until you could curl them, finding the place within her you knew so well.

She moaned.

“Maybe I should take you with me to dinner, have you feed under the table, at my feet as you deserve. Or would you rather eat from me instead? Let the rest of them know what a desperate little slut you are.”

You pressed your thighs together. Your fingers were slow as they pumped inside her, stroking and curling, twisting in a way you’d found she’d liked so much so many months before when the world was still the one you knew. You were sucking on her clit, her fingers pressing you harder, grinding hard against your tongue. The thigh you still held was beginning to tremble and her words were becoming breathy.

“Or maybe I should have you laid out on the table, touching yourself through dinner, let everyone see the control I have over you. Debase yourself in front of them. Show your shame to them all. Remind them you’re nothing but a dirty whore who earned her place here with her body, not through worthwhile means.”

You whined. Her laugh was breathless, fingers in your hair tightening. you could feel your own arousal beginning to drip down your thigh, her words only spurring you on. You wanted all of it, everything she was describing. You wanted her claiming you in front of them. You wanted to debase yourself, her words controlling you, begging her for release for everyone to hear. She owned you, body and soul, and it had taken the end of the world for you to realise how true that was.

“Even Coco is more worthy of her spot here. All you have is your body. Nothing but an object for my pleasure.”

You stroked the spot within her you’d always been able to find in conjuncture with a sharp suck to her clit. Her head fell back, hips jumping forward. Her thighs were squeezing your head, hands forcing you against her. It was hard to breathe but it was unimportant to you, her rising pleasure all that mattered.

“Look best on your knees,” she panted, “desperate to please. Willing to debase yourself, making a spectacle of yourself, demeaning yourself. Think you can please me. Think I’ll like seeing you giving into your animalistic urges. So… So… pathetic.”

She groaned as her internal muscles clenched around your fingers. She was keeping you pinned against her pulsing core, riding your face as hard as she could. With your tongue tasting her, you wondered if she’d cum since the end of the world or if this was the first time in all those months.

Her breath was slow to even out. Your fingers slid from her, your tongue dragging over the skin of your palm to clean yourself up, not wanting to miss a drop of her.

She dragged you up, your knees screaming from being pressed against the stone ground for so long. She ignored your whimper, lips crashing against yours. Her tongue was in your mouth, almost lazy as she stole your breath, giving you what you’d been yearning for since entering the Outpost. It was like kissing your Mina again. Her other hand was pulling up your skirt, fingers skimming your skin, making you whine into her mouth.

With probing fingers she discovered you’d also forgone underwear, bare under her touch. She made a noise, drawing back from the kiss, a look of affected disgust crossing over her face. Her finger ghosted through your folds, lingering on your clit. Your breath froze in your lungs, hips stuttering towards her. She guided you down onto her still bare thigh, bare cunt against her skin.

She curled her lip, watching the way your lips sunk into your bottom lip. The feel of her against you was almost too much. Your hips rocked, a tiny movement that would have been unnoticeable if she hadn’t been watching you so intently.

Her hands grasped your hips, tight enough to leave bruises, keeping you still. You whined again, eyes begging her to let you move. You were dripping with need, her thigh already slick from your arousal. The curl of her lip was undercut by the gleam in her eye, self satisfied and interested in you.

“You disgust me,” she said, “nothing but your base urges motivating you.”

“Ms Venable,” you whined, “please.”

It was torture, being held like that, pressure on your clit but held still. Your breathing was erratic, need filling your veins. Her eyes swept over you, considering you, finding you wanting.

“Go on then,” she said, turning her eyes away from you as if she didn’t care, “rut like the animal you are.”

No matter how much disinterest she tried to affect, her hands were the ones guiding you against her thigh, tensing underneath you. Your head fell back, moaning loudly, wanting her to hear how much she still effected you. She was setting a tortuous pace, your clit slowly dragging over her skin. You were whimpering, trying to catch her eye again, wanting her to see how desperate you were.

Your hips rocked faster, harder, grinding down against her. She was slow to turn her gaze back to you, sweeping over your undulating body again. Her name mingled with pleas and thanks was all that fell from your lips. She snarled at you, only flooding you with more heat. You liked how she degraded you, even as she gave you the pleasure you were so desperate for.

Her fingers grasped your chin as your head began to tip back again, forcing you to look down at her. You moaned, staring in her eyes as your hips ground down, seeking out more pleasure. She growled, pressing her thigh up harder. You wanted to bury your fingers in her hair, feel the silky strands against your skin, pull the pins out so they’d tumble down her back. You wanted to kiss her deeply, burying your moans in her mouth. You wanted her to watch you come undone.

You made a small noise in the back of your throat, breathy and throaty, a half whine. Her eyes were watching you, lips pressed together, a flush high on her cheekbones, barely visible in the firelight. You were rocking against her, chasing your high, the spring tightening within you. Your fingers clenched around nothing, not knowing if you could touch her, muscles straining to the point of trembling.

“Aren’t you done yet?” she drawled.

Your breath caught, body tensing above her, your orgasm crashing into you. Wave after wave moved through you, her name sweet nectar on your tongue as you cried it. A smirk settled on her face, eyes practically smouldering, fingers tightening on your hips again. Your head fell forward, seeking out her lips.

She allowed you to kiss her, surprisingly soft. Her tongue stroked against yours and despite the fact your heart was still beating double time from your orgasm, heat stoked in your lower stomach again. You sunk your teeth into her lip, giving in to your impulse. A hand pressed between your shoulder blades, forcing you against her body. Soft supple curves pressed against yours, the rough fabric of her dress scraping your skin.

The kiss softened again, more reminiscent of times long since gone. You sighed into her mouth, hands finally landing on her shoulder, thumb brushing against her pulse point. With strength that had always surprised you, she lifted you from her thigh, laying you back on the bed. Her hands skimmed down your body, featherlight until you were thrumming under her fingers.

“I must admit,” she murmured against your lips, “I have missed you.”

“Really?” you asked, drawing back just far enough to see her properly.

“You are the owner of my heart, little one. Holding back from having you has been torture,” she said, fingers stroking through your hair, pulling leftover pins from it.

“Then why were you?” you asked, wondering how long you’d have your Mina back.

“Maintaining distance was necessary. I could smuggle you in but once here I couldn’t show any such favouritism. Not if I wished to remain in charge, unquestioned and complete,” she said, “and you made it so incredibly difficult, little one. I felt those beautiful eyes watching me, looking so lost and hurt. All I wanted was to take that hurt away.”

“I just didn’t understand how I’d lost you. The end of the world and you were there but you weren’t and I had no one.”

Her fingers were still running through your hair, comforting and soft. Her other arm curled around your waist, rolling until she was lying on the bed, holding you close. You rested your head on her shoulder, pressing yourself to her with a level of neediness you didn’t usually feel around her. After months without, you needed it more than you needed air.

“So now what?” you asked her.

“What do you mean?” she asked, lips brushing your hairline.

“We just had unauthorised sex,” you said, “am I going to be shot?”

“Of course not.” She stiffened and you could hear the horror in her voice, “I authorised it. I am the leader of Outpost Three, after all.”

“Yeah, that whole thing has definitely awoken something in me,” you said.

Her soft chuckle vibrated through her chest, passing into yours. You pressed closer, legs tangling together, uncaring of the arousal that still coated both of your skin. Her lips pressed to your forehead.

“I noticed, little one,” she said, “perhaps next time I’ll tie you up and tease you until you think you’re going mad.”

Your shaky exhalation earned you another kiss, soft and lingering, a promise for you to cash in.

“In public we shall remain as always. The leader and a Purple. Behind closed doors, we shall be us again,” she said, “if that’s agreeable to you?”

“I’ll take whatever I can get of you,” you replied, “you’re my world and I’ve missed you so much.”

Your name was sweet on her tongue, a soft sigh, a small smile. You lent up, kissing her until she was melting beneath your touch. You felt liquid, dreamlike, you hopes coming true right in front of you.

“I love you,” you muttered against her lips.

She rolled you, hovering above you, staring down with those dark eyes. Firelight danced across her skin and she’d never looked so beautiful to you.

“I love you too, little one,” she said, before kissing you once again.

[dreamypqulson]

Hi :) i love your writing and was hoping you could do one wear Cordelia finds out y/n is sh on her thigh? Or something <3

— my love, mine all mine

pairing: cordelia goode x reader

word count: 1500

warnings: self harm & depression

note: i got this request during my break so it’s a little old but i still wanted to write it cause it fits with my life right now!!!

You stared blankly at your bloody thigh in front of you. With the blade still grasped in your hand you tried to breathe in, and hold for five seconds, and then let it all out. It would help they told you. It would take away the misery until you didn't feel like hurting yourself anymore.

But you laughed a little as you watched the blood drip. It felt good and that was the worst part. You wanted to keep going. You almost did. You wanted the thoughts to shut up for a minute. But right as the blade lightly touched your flesh, there was a knock at the door.

And it snapped you out of it for a minute. Really, how long were you sitting on the cold bathroom floor for? Had anyone really noticed your absence or do they just need to get into the bathroom?

"Mhm?" You hummed, shaky but nonetheless clear.

"Are you okay, darling? You disappeared on me." Right as you heard that sweet familiar voice, you bounced off of the floor. Frantically, you grabbed a tissue and applied pressure to the broken skin after hiding the blade in the back of the cabinet.

"Yeah, sorry. I'll be out in a minute."

Cordelia didn't know about what was going on. Of course, she knows you struggle with mental health, but she'd hadn't yet found out about your legs. And you weren't planning on telling her.

By the way that you spoke, she felt like something was wrong. And, naturally, she wouldn't back down. She needed to help you with whatever was wrong.

"Can I come in?" She jiggled the doorknob but it was locked. You don't ever lock doors.

The blood leaked through the thin tissue and you cursed under your breath. You couldn't clean up with a wash cloth right now. You wouldn't have enough time to hide the evidence.

You looked up at the door and your blood ran cold. Answer her! You have to answer her before she comes in!

You pulled your sweatpants back up and flushed away the bloody tissues down the toilet so she couldn’t see them in the trash. "I'm coming," you said, and at this point, you were out of breath from the verge of a panic attack.

You opened the door and Cordelia's eyes widened. You were clearly frantic and you tried so hard to not cringe at the feeling of your pants rubbing against your raw cuts.

"Are you okay?" She asked again, but now she's more suspicious. You just nod your head and walk right by her. She follows you as you throw yourself on the bed.

Something doesn't feel right to her, but she tries to make it better by laying beside you and kissing you. You started to giggle looking over at her and for a moment, you completely forget about everything that just happened. She does too.

It isn't until she looks down that her eyes widen. And you're always so cautious about getting caught that your heart immediately drops.

"Why are you bleeding?" She asks, and sits up. You sit up too, and that's when you notice the patch of crimson on your thigh. Of course you'd just happen to be wearing grey sweatpants.

"Shit," you angrily curse, and start to get up off the bed. "I'm not sure. I'll go check it out though."

You try to head towards the bathroom but Cordelia grabs your arm so you can't move. You're fucked and you know it. "No, y/n. Why are you bleeding? Do not lie to me."

You always want Cordelia when you're injured or sick, so it was unusual for you to go run off. And after you acting strange in the bathroom, she was starting to think that she knew what is going on.

"I'm not lying, Cordelia! Are you serious right now?" Your voice raised slightly, going into a defensive mode, but Cordelia was quick to calm you.

"Hey, shh, shh. None of that. Just be honest with me, sweetie, i'm not mad." She reached up and cupped your cheek. Your lip started to tremble and you couldn't hold back the waterfall of tears. You couldn't bring yourself to tell her. "Are you hurting yourself?" She asks gently.

All you do is nod, and the waterworks stream heavier down your face. You simply shatter and Cordelia wraps her arms around you like she's trying to hold every piece of you together. "Oh, my baby. Okay, shh. It’s okay," the blonde cooes in your ear, rubbing calming circles into your back.

Her warm arms and floral scent keeps you grounded. You feel safe. Maybe it is okay.  "Do you want to talk about it, my lovely? Or no?"

You shake your head. You're too tired, and you don't feel like explaining everything. It's too much, too heavy, and you feel too weak.

"Okay. That's okay. Can I at least clean them for you? I don't want my girl getting an infection."

For once you speak up a quiet, "yes that's okay," and it hurts but you know that you’re being too nonresponsive already and you feel like a lot of work right now.

Cordelia grabs your hand and brings you back into the bathroom. She waits for your permission with her fingers resting on the waistband of your sweatpants. She'd wait here forever until you were ready. But you feel like you’ve already wasted so much of her time.

You nod your head and then Cordelia starts to slide your pants down your legs and you want her to stop. You want to take your permission back but you can't seem to talk. You can't seem to do anything and, god, you feel like you can't even breathe.

She doesn't gasp when she sees your bloody thigh. Her face doesn't contort into disgust. She looks so soft and gentle and you wonder how someone could be so pure enough to love someone like you.

She lifts you onto the bathroom counter. You don't even notice that you moved at first.

And even as Cordelia was looking straight at the bloody cuts, you still felt the need to lie and tell her that you weren't hurting actually yourself. It didn't feel real. Almost like you were shoved into another persons body with all of these scars and hurt on it.

You notice Cordelia looking at your whole thigh, how she can see all the old scars there. It hurts the most for her to see recent ones. Ones she can tell have been from the past weeks, even days, and she had absolutely no clue about it until now.

"I want you to tell me, my love," she says, so softly, and smiles gently too like she's not talking about you hurting yourself. "Okay? Whenever you feel like this, come to me, baby."

You nod simply, like it's the easiest task in the world. But you're not sure that you'll be able to even do that. You can see the pain and worry on Cordelia's face beneath that smile, and you don't want to hurt her anymore.

She grabs your hand, holds it there tightly. She knows you always like to hold it when you're upset or nervous, or even when you get shots at the doctors. She doesn't need to tell you that you're allowed to squeeze it; you already know you can.

Cordelia dabs away the blood with a wet cloth. It sends a sting throughout your entire body. You squeeze her hand and bite your lip hard enough to draw blood. All Cordelia can say is, "I know, I know, baby. I'm sorry. I'm almost done." And you wonder why she's apologizing. I did this. I brought this on myself. It's my fault.

Cordelia gently applies some antiseptic to your cuts and then she adds some band-aids on top. They're not the boring tan ones either. They're colorful and it even puts a smile on your face because it's such a Cordelia thing to do.

"There we go. All better," she says, as if cutting yourself wasn't the scariest thing in the world for her. But right now it is all better. You're bandaged up and Cordelia is holding your hand and smiling at you. Right now you don't hurt as much.

She leans forward and places a kiss on your nose. You crinkle it up and giggle at her. "You're so pretty, ya know." And it's not a question. She's not asking if you know that you're pretty. Because she knows that you really don't think you are. Especially not like this. But it doesn't matter right now. She just needs you to know that she thinks it so then it has to be true.

You're gonna cry again because your heart feels so tender, but then Cordelia is talking again and you get lost away in her voice. "How about we go have some hot cocoa by the fire? You feel like a little icicle." She says it like nothing has changed. Like she hadn't just found out that you're really a danger to yourself.

And you nod because you're still the same person you were to her thirty minutes ago. You still love cuddling her by the fireplace with a cup of hot chocolate that she made you. That hasn't changed, neither has her love for you.

[enchantedruin]

I've been assigned to evaluate the people here and select those most worthy of survival. I could take all of you—or none of you. Those who make it live. Those who don't—end up like my horses.

[deliasbabe]

Take Me Back to Eden - Venable x Reader - Part 2

Words: 1.6k+

Warnings: Language

Part 1

“Do they have any contracts with the government?” You asked, sitting across the table from your boss. You had spent the past week gathering as much information as you could for this “date”, but it hadn’t amounted to much, at least not yet.

Venable shook her head, “Are they trying to get one?”

“Not that I know of.” Venable said carefully, “Why?”

“Do they have any independent contracts?” You asked, ignoring Venable’s question.

“No.” Venable said, rephrasing her previous question, “What did you find?”

You threw up one of your hands as you sipped your wine, “Right now, not much. They’re having me code for a security system, but it looks pretty high level. Air locks, motion sensors and alarms, independent rainwater filtration, off-grid electricity… you get the idea.”

Venable nodded, “And where would require such a system?”

You shook your head, rattling off anything that came to mind, “Military bases, maximum security prisons, labs that deal with extremely dangerous and volatile compounds…”

“Is there any way it could be for home use?” Venable asked.

 “Yea, maybe, if they were preparing for a war.” You laughed, “This is fortress level shit.”

Venable hummed, fighting the urge to snap at you for laughing at her question, “Is there anything else?”

“Not yet,” You said, shaking your head, “They’re giving it to me in pieces. All I know right now is that there is a locked file called “Deck Scrub”, whatever that means.”

Venable smirked over the rim of her wine glass, “Then I guess we have to set up another date.”

You shrugged, “I guess we do.”

What was supposed to be one date quickly turned into four, then five as you gathered more information. While they did stay business related, Venable found herself to actually be enjoying them, although she wasn’t sure if it was because she enjoyed your company, or she took pleasure out of going over the boys’ heads. Either way, you were at the very least tolerable to her, and that was a feat in and of itself.

“I’ve figured it out.” You said, a grin splaying across your face from ear to ear, and Venable could feel her heart race with the promise of new information. “They’re developing nuclear decontamination protocols.”

“Nuclear decontamination protocols?” Venable asked, “What would they need those for?”

You shrugged, but were still smiling, “I don’t know, but that file, deck scrub? It was a protocol for clearing nuclear particles from the skin, they want me to start coding the program tomorrow.”

“Why would they want you to handle a project of this magnitude?” Venable asked, shaking her head.

“Because I have experience with nuclear programs.” You answered, “I worked at a testing facility years ago.”

“So, it is for the government?” Venable asked, more of a statement than a question.

You nodded, “It has to be, that’s the only explanation for why they kept you out of it.”

You had expected that to be the last “date”. After all, figuring out what they were up to was the entire point, and your dare was long since fulfilled, but at the end of the meal, Venable asked, “Same time next week?”

She was surprised when you walked into her office a week later, your face a sickly shade of white, “I have to cancel tonight.”

Venable looked over your form and sighed, “Are you ill?”

“What?” You asked, very obviously out of it, before you shook your head, “No, I’m not sick.”

Venable knew the look on your face meant something was going on, so she pressed, “Is one of your family members in the hospital, or dead?”

You shook your head again, “No.”

Venable raised an eyebrow, “Then I see no need to cancel.”

You took a moment to prepare yourself before you said, “I can’t feed you information anymore.”

Venable grit her teeth, “You got caught.”

“No,” You said, your voice barely above a whisper, “I didn’t get caught.”

With your admission, Venable couldn’t control her temper even if she wanted to, “We had a deal.”

“And I fulfilled my end,” You spit, “Many times over.”

“It’s not fulfilled until I say it is.” Venable sneered, “Or have you forgotten what your other option was?”

“Then fire me.” You fired back, “Go ahead, tell Jeff and Mutt that I was terminated because I refused to give you information about a project you don’t even have clearance for.”

Venable jutt out her chin, “I don’t have to tell them anything.”

“Really?” You sneered, “Because I’m cc’d on all your emails. I know you have to have written approval from the both of them, and until this project is complete, you won’t get it.”

“Get. Out.” Venable ground out, pointing you towards the door as she fumed. You didn’t have to be told twice, stomping out of the room and back to your desk. While you were relieved the conversation was over, you weren’t stupid enough to think your outburst wouldn’t have ramifications. You showed your hand, and you knew it was only a matter of time until the project was over, and you were open season for Venable. She wouldn’t let this slide, she couldn’t. If she wasn’t already compiling a list of reasons to fire you, she was going to start.

Your suspicions were all but confirmed over the next week. Suddenly, emails were missing from your inbox, meetings were missed, and Venable was at your throat night and day. She had somehow managed to convince Jeff and Mutt to let you work double duty, splitting time between coding and running various errands for her, and it was going terribly. She sent you out to get macarons for a client, only to scream at you about their almond allergy, had you drop off her dry cleaning, only to tell you the pickup date and time was wrong. You knew what she was doing, forcing you to choose between being fired or quitting, but you weren’t going to play her game. If she wanted information, she was going to get it.

You caught her on the walk back from Jeff and Mutt’s lab, when she sneered about some errand she didn’t tell you about that was supposed to already be completed, grabbing her by the arm and dragging her into a secluded hallway as she gasped in surprise, “What the fuck do you think you’re doing?”

“Giving you what you want.” You bit, a perplexed look on her features, “I found a map for the shelters, and not all of them are in the US.”

Venable eyed you carefully, not understanding why you felt the need to keep something as simple as a map to yourself, “So?”

You sighed, “None of them are near military bases, or government buildings, or highly populated areas. They have no significance, at all.”

Venable shook her head, “What does that mean?”

“It means they aren’t working for the government. They’re building off grid, privately owned, fallout shelters that span across the globe.” You spit out, glancing around to make sure no one was walking past.

Venable snickered, “This is what you were so worked up about? A bunch of doomsday preppers?”

You glared at her, “This is more than that. If that were the case there would be one, maybe two at most, not ten that they’re building simultaneously. They’re preparing for global nuclear war.”

Venable glanced up as a group of employees walked past the hallway, her face setting as she spit, “And if your grimy little fingers ever touch me again, I’ll make sure you never regain their use. Now, get back to work before you don’t have a job.”

She could see the hurt written on your face, and for a moment she almost felt sorry, but it was fleeting as you walked away. She watched you sit down at your desk, watched your features tense and relax until you regained your composure, leaning forward and clacking away on your keyboard despite the prying eyes of your coworkers. When you didn’t react, their gaze turned to Venable, who stood tall and glared at them, “Get back to work.”

You didn’t give her anymore information after that, and she didn’t ask, instead choosing to try one last time to get information from the source, and when that didn’t pan out, she resigned, effective immediately.

“We can’t let you resign.” Jeff said.

“You don’t have a choice.” Venable sneered, packing the last of her things into a cardboard box, “I can’t work here anymore.”

Mutt smiled, “That we can agree on.”

“You can’t work for a company that isn’t going to exist anymore.” Jeff explained, “In fact, nothing will exist anymore.”

Venable felt a chill run up her spine, “Pardon me?”

Jeff smirked, “You might want to sit down for this one.”

She sat there while they explained it all, about the cooperative, the bombs, the outposts. She listened to them tell her that they wanted her to lead one of the outposts, how she could make up her own rules, and no one would be able to stop her. She heard herself agreeing, and then something unexpected came tumbling out.

“I want Y/n to go with me.”

Jeff and Mutt exchanged glances, “What? Do you have the hots for her?”

“Don’t be ridiculous,” Venable sneered, her cheeks flushing as she tried to come up with some reasonable explanation, “Who better to monitor the system than the person who created it?”

Jeff and Mutt exchanged another glance, and Venable interjected, “That is what you were stealing my employee for, was it not?”

The two boys looked at each other and smirked, “We’ll add her to the list.”

The two stood and began to walk away, but Venable called after them, “Don’t tell her. She’s an idiot, she’ll tell this whole office if you give her the chance.”

[neverspoetic]

I'm addicted to red-haired women

[marchtomydrums]

You're Safe Little One

Cordelia Goode x Ally Mayfair x Wilhelmina Enable x reader (mother/daughter)

“What are we going to do?!” Zoe shouts looking down at Madison who is passed out on the bathroom floor.

“I’m going to have to call my mom.” You sighed reaching for your phone.

“Are you insane?!” Zoe shouts grabbing your phone.

“Cordelia will be so pissed, and Mina might kill us all.”

“I know that’s why I’m calling Ally!” You yelled at her snatching your phone back.

Zoe rolls her eyes “You think Ally isn’t going to tell them?”

“She will tell them but at least she won’t freak out on me until tomorrow. Plus we need to get out of here those guys Madison met are giving me the creeps. And I’m feeling dizzy, I think they drugged us, Zoe.”

“What do you mean?”

“I don’t know something just doesn’t feel right. I’m calling Ally.”

Zoe nods as she goes back to Madison to check on her. Meanwhile, you waited for Ally to pick up breathing heavily as the phone rang.

“Hey, honey.” She answers.

“Ally.”

“What’s wrong love?” She asked.

Damn, how did she know just by your voice? You think to yourself.

“Can you please pick me, Zoe, and Madison up? I know you’ll be mad but we’re at this party and there are some guys here and they’re giving me bad vibes. And they gave us drinks but Ally I don’t feel good. Something is wrong. And Mads is passed out and I can’t wake her up.”

“Where are you?”

“I can send you my location. We are all three locked in the bathroom. But ally..please hurry. And please don’t bring Mom and Momma. I know you guys will be mad but I don’t feel comfortable here.” You tell her.

“I’ll be right there,” Ally says hanging up the phone. You let out a breath of relief as you ended the phone call.

“So we’re good?” Zoe asked.

“Yeah. Ally’s cool. We will be fine.” You said giving her a small smile as you tried to center yourself.

It was not fine an hour later you felt worse and then you heard the door slam open and instantly you knew.

“Y/n y/m/n y/l/n!!!” The voice echoed throughout the house.

“Fuck.” You mumbled unlocking the bathroom door to see Cordelia, Mina, and Ally standing there.

“Ally.” You whined.

“Don’t blame her you know better!” Cordelia shouts. Looking over she sees Madison lying on the ground.

“Shit Madison.” She sighs walking towards her and leaving you with Ally and Mina.

“Did those boys hurt you?” Mina asked looking over at the group of young boys.

“No ma’am. I just got a weird vibe from them so I called Ally to bring us home.”

“Well I’m proud of you for that but I’m also extremely disappointed in you. Not only for drinking but for calling Ally and putting her in an impossible position.”

“I know.” You whispered bowing your head.

“You and Zoe go to the car. We will be there in a few.” She says.

You and Zoe nod your heads as you walk past her towards the car. Walking past Ally you stopped and whispered “I’m sorry Al.”

Ally nods as you walked past her sighing a bit as she watches Mina and Cordelia yell at the group of boys. Once Cordelia was able to lift Madison she walked to the car putting her in the back seat. Before they can leave Ally stops the older women.

“Listen I know she’s in trouble and she could have gotten hurt but let’s try to remember that they’re just teenagers before we make any decisions.”

“What’s your point?” Mina asked.

“My point is go back and remember what it was like to be 15. When I was her age I never would have called my parents. No matter what was going on. I didn’t trust them enough. All I’m saying is cut her some slack, please. She knew something was wrong and she called.”

“She called you!” Mina shouts.

“And maybe you should ask yourself why!” Ally shouts back.

“Because she thought you would lie to us. Because you’re the cool parent.” Mina scoffs.

“She knew I would tell you both eventually. She called me because she knew I would come no questions asked.” Ally says.

Cordelia sighs” She’s right Mina. We can both be a little hard on her. We expect a lot from y/n.”

Mina sighs “Clearly not hard enough. Look where we are. She could have been hurt!”

“Yes, but she called before it got that far. So maybe Ally is right, she should be cut some slack.”

“Let’s go home,” Mina mumbled walking to the car.

The ride home was spent in silence. The three women each had thoughts running around their minds. Madison and Zoe were passed out but you couldn’t sleep. Maybe it was the drugs or your anxiety but you couldn’t close your eyes.

Once you reached the academy Zoe and Madison wake up enough to walk to their rooms with the help of Myrtle and Misty. You stayed behind because you knew the night was nowhere near over for you. The three women sighed a breath of relief before heading straight into the living room.

“Y/n come here,” Cordelia calls out. You sighed walking into the room.

The three of them were sitting on the couch. Cordelia opens her arms out to you. “Come here, honey.”

You nod as you sit in her lap and she wraps her arms around you.

“Are you okay?”

You shake your head no. After everything that happened tonight, you finally broke once you realized you were safe.

“I’m sorry. I know I shouldn’t have gone to that party. But it was fine at first until they gave us the drinks. The boys kept looking at us and asking if we were okay but I knew something was wrong. The room was spinning and once I realized Madison passed out I told Zoe I was calling Ally. I knew Ally would tell you guys but I didn’t want you to come and see me like that. I just wanted to come home. I’m sorry Mom.” You said crying into her shoulder.

“It’s alright baby you’re home now. You’re safe.” Cordelia says softly.

“I know I disappointed all of you. I’m so sorry.” You cried.

“Honey, you're young things like this happen. But I am very proud of you for calling me.” Ally says with a smile.

You returned the smile to her as you looked over at Mina. The thought of disappointing any of your moms was hard for you but especially when it came to the redhead.

“Momma... I…I’m sorry. I know you expect more from me and I let you down. I’ll do better I promise.” You tell her looking down at your feet feeling ashamed for letting her down.

“Little one look at me please,” Mina calls out.

Lifting your head slowly you make eye contact with her.

“When Ally told me what was going on I was so angry. I went there with every intention of yelling at you and causing a scene. And yes I was disappointed. But more than anything I was scared. Scared that something had or was going to happen to my little girl. I felt out of control and that scared me. Because I never want you to get to hurt. The thought of those boys hurting you frightened me. I know I’m hard on you. And I know that you worry that you’re letting me down. But that is far from the truth. You make me so happy and so proud to call myself your mother. And tonight I was extremely proud of you. Not only for calling for help but for taking care of Madison and Zoe and keeping the three of you safe until we got there. I love you sweetheart and I just want to always keep you safe that’s all. “

“I know. But still, I’m sorry Momma.”

“I know dear. Come here.” She says opening her arms out to you.

You crawled into her lap laying your head on her shoulder as you cried. The three women sat in silence as you cried. Each thanking the gods that you were safe but also thinking about what could have happened if they hadn’t gotten there in time.

“Momma I don’t feel good.” You whispered.

“How much did you drink?”

“Only one. I swear. I feel sleepy. “

“It's the drugs,” Ally states looking at the other women.

“They drugged them for sure. We all know Madison is a heavy drinker and she was out cold. Zoe mentioned Madison only had two drinks. Those boys had an agenda for sure.”

“ They’re lucky I didn’t kill them.” Mina growls.

“Agreed. But for now, let’s focus on the girls. I’ll have Myrtle and Misty stay with Zoe and Madison and we will take y/n to our room for the night. “ Cordelia says.

“Sounds like a plan,” Ally says standing up.

“Let me carry her Mina,” Ally says taking you out of the redhead's lap.

You groaned trying to focus on Ally but your eyes were too heavy.

“Ally?” You questioned.

“I’ve got you sweet girl. Everything is okay.” She cooed carrying you upstairs to their bedroom.

Once Cordelia and Mina checked on the other girls the three women laid down in bed with you. They watched over you as you slept peacefully.

“Some many things could have happened tonight.” Mina sighed caressing your cheek.

“True. But she’s safe now and that is all that matters.” Cordelia whispered.

“I know but..”

“Mina,” Ally calls out to her holding her hand tightly.

“She’s safe love. She’s alright.”

Mina nods her head as she bends down to kiss your forehead.

“You’re safe little one.”

[lanawinters-ily]

The Purple Dragon

Wilhelmina Venable is the most unapproachable, untouchable individual you had ever met, yet she has a soft spot for you. Why?

Pairing: Wilhelmina Venable x Reader

Word Count: 1600

Warnings: mention of struggling with mental health

Wilhelmina Venable was a complex individual. Stand-offish, rude, stubborn. The negative descriptions could go on, yet some element of you felt drawn to her.

Throughout your lifetime you had always sought out hidden meanings - in books, signs, & eventually people. Being a firm believer in the fact that everything happens for a reason, meant that you always thought that people acted a certain way because of a certain thing.

There must be an explanation for everything - past or present. Whether this was a desire to control, or to balance the unknown in life, you didn’t know.

All that mattered was your inquisition. And consequently, this would lead you on the greatest adventure of your life.

You had known her for almost a year, the longest lasting assistant she had ever had. It could be due to your competence, your failure to give up, or possibly some element of Ms Venable.

However, this didn’t make working with the redhead any easier. She was called the ‘purple dragon’ for a reason; holding a fiery passion that most considered anger.

But not you.

Because of this, you had always treated Venable with the kindest of hearts. This was not unusual for you, but even the most saint-like person could crumble with one strike of the redhead’s stony glare. Luckily you had everlasting compassion when it came to even the most difficult of souls.

Well, not all the time.

It was a bad day. One of those days in which the bed is so comfy, so warm, so safe, that it seems impossible to leave. Your heart was heavy, & your mind even more so, dragging your body into the heavy depths; sinking & drowning as you were held down by the currents of numbness.

You should have called in sick, taken a day off for yourself, but you weren’t very good at doing this. Being a burden, a difficulty, seemed far worse than pulling yourself through the workday, so you chose to stumble into the office with the countenance of a particularly exhausted zombie.

Wilhelmina was also having a rough day, waking up with severe pain along her spine. This pain was not only physical, it also brought with it a fair share of mental anguish - mostly made up of resentment & irritation at her weakness.

What only made this worse was what the redhead discovered when she arrived at work. She had forgotten to bring her bag, & therefore, her medication.

Fuck, she cursed.

As the pain increased, she became even more aware of the fact that she couldn’t drive in this condition. She didn’t have a phone or any money either, so it’s not like she could call a taxi to pop home. Wilhelmina was just going to have to grit her teeth & bare it for the next few hours, hoping that the gods would spare her the agony just this once.

“Ms Venable? Are you alright?”

You had appeared in the doorway of Wilhelmina’s office, eyes worriedly scanning her hunched over figure.

The redhead snapped up into an unnoticeable posture, feigning normality despite the pained shudder that rippled through her body.

“I’m just fine Miss Y/L/N.”

It was her turn to do a double take, looking at you with narrowed eyes as she scrutinised your appearance.

“On the contrary, it seems that you are not.”

This was entirely in character for Ms Venable to make such a blunt observation, so you were used to it. However, for some reason, today it was the last straw.

You bursted into noisy tears & sank to the ground. Curled up into a ball, you sobbed uncontrollably, not even caring about who was watching. What you were crying about, you weren’t quite sure. All you knew was that you couldn’t take today, & your emotions had just spilled out in a violent flow.

All you wanted was to lay on this cold, uncomforting floor & fall asleep. Or disappear. Anything would be better than this.

"Hey, sh sh sh," a gentle voice shushed your sobs of despair.

The contrast in tone led you to believe that another of your colleagues had come to your rescue, yet you didn't recognize the voice. You looked up in confusion, only to be met with a blur of purple.

Ms Venable; formidable, heartless, cold Ms Venable was knelt next to you.

"Come on, little one. Let's get you up." She said in a whispered tone.

Half in shock, half still in despair, you allowed yourself to be led to the purple sofa by the window. Your body felt so numb, not feeling Ms Venable's tight grip, or the sofa material as you sank into it. All you could do was sit & stare blankly, too overwhelmed internally to make a sound.

A familiar hand just stroked through your messy hair, silently understanding that words were too much. Lulling you into a calm, dreamlike state, this repetitive motion was just what you needed.

As you caught your heavy breaths & your parasympathetic system took hold, Wilhelmina was facing her own battle.

Her back was still in agony, even more so after kneeling & supporting your weight. Yet, somehow, her heart hurt thrice as much.

She never wanted it to be this way. You were the kindest, sweetest, most gentle person she had ever met. There was an essence about you that was addictive to Wilhelmina, a perfume of lightness that she couldn't help but smell until she was perfectly dizzy with love.

That was the issue. Love.

"Ms Venable," you mumbled. "Your back, you can't be sitting like this it-"

"It's okay little one, I'm alright." She spoke gently. "And call me Wilhelmina."

You noticed. You saw her. If possible, the butterflies in Mina's stomach flew more frantically as she tried to control the deep blush that settled on her cheeks.

God, she felt like a lovesick teenager all of a sudden.

"Okay, Mina." You said cheekily, gaining some colour back to your previously pale disposition.

Wilhelmina gave you a stern look, but it was more a caricature of her usual demeanor, turned soft by you.

You both wanted to say something, but were simply lost in each other's eyes. Her pupils were a rich brown, so deep that you could wander in them for hours and never get bored.

Without warning, she moved closer to you, resting her hand onto your knee. You closed the gap, pulling her into a kiss of fiery passion.

Perhaps she did like being a dragon after all, just not in the way she had expected.

Wilhelmina was hypnotic; a drug, and now you had a taste you just couldn't get enough. And from the way she was kissing you, it seemed as if she was just as addicted.

She was the first to pull away, which made your breath shudder with anxiety. What if she regretted this?

But her comforting hand resting on your cheek, and the look of adoration in her eyes told you otherwise.

"What's going on sweet one, hm?"

You broke her gaze, feeling entirely too vulnerable. There was nothing you hated more than explaining your mental state; it didn't even make sense to you so how were you to express it.

"It's just one of those days Mina, where everything feels...wrong." You sighed. "I don't really know how to say it in a way that makes sense."

"It's okay." Wilhelmina nodded. "I think I get where you're coming from. Sometimes when I'm having a bad day with my back, I can struggle with that too."

"You do?" You said in surprise.

"Yes, darling. I do."

"But you're always so strong. I never would have thought."

"People have different ways of showing it, little one." Mina spoke gently. "I snap at people, I get angry, I scream; all because I feel so out of control."

"Oh." You said. It all made sense now.

This time, she captured your lips in a kiss. It was more slow and steady than the former; a way of saying 'we have time'.

So, you sat there for a while, quietly soaking in each other's presence and stealing a kiss every few moments.

If someone had told you an hour ago that Wilhelmina Venable would be looking at you like this, being gentle with you like this, you would have laughed in their face.

Never did you think that your feelings would be returned, and neither did she.

Suddenly the door creaked open, and one of your colleagues stepped in. Instantly you tensed, waiting for Wilhelmina to turn away from you, to be embarrassed by you.

But she sat, unmoving, as her steely gaze fixed on her new target.

"Susan." She said bluntly. "What have I told you about knocking before disturbing me?"

Now Susan was a fairly confident woman, chatty most times. But in the presence of the purple dragon, she crumbled and stuttered.

"I j-just needed-"

"Needed what? Something so important that you decided to barge straight into my office unannounced? An emergency, perhaps?"

"Well, no but-"

"Well then I'd prefer if you let us be, thank you."

And that was that. Susan scuttled out of the room like a scolded child. To your utmost surprise, Wilhelmina pulled you into her side and kissed your hairline.

"No harm will come to you now I'm around, little one."

"I love you Mina."

"I love you most, my sweet."

[mistysgardenn]

this crossover would be insane

[stayevildarling]

Hello! I saw your little post about a prompt and was hoping you could write a fic with Mina, Delia, Billie, and reader? Maybe Billie has a bad day and forgets to pick reader up from work so reader has to walk home in the rain. While she is walking home someone starts following her and she gets scared and calls Mina crying. Cordelia and Mina are worried sick when they get to reader. When Billie eventually gets home later she feels awful that she forgot to pick up reader. Mina gets into a fight with Billie about it and Billie breakdowns about the awful day she had and that she is sorry. Just some good old love, fluff, hurt/comfort? Here are some prompts too, if that sparks any inspo! Thank you SO much!

Prompts:

“Honey, I can’t understand you. Take a deep breath and tell me what’s going on.” “Stay right where you are, okay? Don’t hang up the phone. Keep talking to me. We are coming to get you.”

“My god you’re freezing.” ~ “I’m- f-fine. I’m n-not c-cold. P-promise.” ~ “You are certainly not fine and you know I do not tolerate lying. Sit. Down.”

“Oh for gods sake. You have to be kidding me.”

“Can you please stop yelling? You’re scaring her!”

“If it makes you feel any better, you’re very pretty when you cry” ~ “(sobbing) It…it does…thank you”

Sorry that is quite long and no pressure to write of course! Thank you and sending all the most love and hugs!🧡🧡🧡

Cordelia Goode x Billie Dean Howard x Wilhemina Venable x Reader- Home

A/N: thank you so much for this request!🫶🏼 I‘m struggling a bit with my other wip‘s so this was perfect to spark my inspiration again!

tw/tags: established poly relationship, female reader, mention of smoking, mention of cursing, angst, hurt/comfort

word count: 2k

taglist:

@lunaticwhittaker , @billiebeanhoward , @lanawinters-ily , @kenzbro , @minaslittleone , @httpfiftyshadesofgay @whitelotus00 , @ninaahelvar , @paulsonsratched , @vintagepaulson , @isle-of-earle , @grilledcheeseandguavajelly , @lucyintheskywithxanax , @fanfics4world , @mymiraclewitch , @hazard-to-myself , @awritersometimes , @wastdstime , @p1pecleanerwitheyes , @queen2234 , @ihartnat , @lifebyinez , @ahsatanizgay , @blu3dimples, @stepintomyworld

By the time you finally make it out of work, you are greeted with darkness and pouring rain. The wind causes you to shiver and you instinctively pull your coat a little closer as you try and look out for Billie‘s car. Usually the medium would always be on time, waiting for you with that same smirk, some music blasting through her speakers and mostly a cigarette in her mouth. However, as you wait for a little longer you realize she isn‘t anywhere to be seen and so you pull out your phone, checking for any messages but only finding some from your other two girlfriends about dinner plans. You opt to call Billie and clutch the phone to your ear as the rain makes it impossible to hear.

„Sorry babydoll, I‘ll call you back later, I‘m stuck in a meeting“ she mumbles into the phone before hanging up. You sigh a little, realizing she must have forgotten and so you opt to walk, pulling up the hood from your jacket and beginning to walk towards home. It wasn‘t too far and so you begin walking, excited to see Mina and Delia, trying not to get upset about Billie forgetting about you. You knew she was busy, medium to the stars with her own show and getting picked up for multiple new seasons but you couldn’t deny that it stings a little, remembering how she would usually never forget about you, spoil you rotten and put you first, just like you would with her.

At the halfway mark, you are drenched from the rain that keeps pouring on you, your clothes dripping and shivering from the cold. The only lightsource are the cars occasionally driving past you as well as the occasional streetlight and you can‘t help the uncomfortable feeling in your gut. As you turn around you notice a hooded figure behind you and you begin to pick up your pace, walking a different route to usual to shake them off. But the faster and further you walk, the hooded figure seems to come closer and you can‘t help but feel the trembling of your hands and anxiety in your chest. Panting, you reach your phone and begin to call Wilhemina.

„Hi little one- where are you both? we“ she begins but stops herself as soon as she hears the shaking of your breathing.

„Mi-‚Mina, Billie forgot.. pick me up.. walking home.. someone following“ you mumble, too scared to find your voice propery. The redheads‘s features drop upon hearing your disttress, dropping the utensils she was holding to make dinner, Cordelia beside her picking up her girlfriends distress.

“Honey, I can’t understand you. Take a deep breath and tell me what’s going on“ she instructs and you stop walking for a moment as you adjust your breathing.

„Sorry Mina, I‘m walking home and I think someone is following me“ you manage to say and she instantly drops what she is doing, grabbing Delia and their coats.

“Stay right where you are, okay? Don’t hang up the phone. Keep talking to me. We are coming to get you“ she urges and you nod before realizing she can‘t hear you. The redhead stays on the phone, asking for your exact whereabouts. It takes them less than a minute to get to you as you had been much closer to home than you originally thought in your panicking state.

Warm hands reach for you as you almost stumble into Wilhemina. They instantly notice the hooded figure and as soon as Cordelia steps forward, they disappear into the darkness of the night. „You‘re okay little one“ Wilhemina encourages as they take your hands and walk you back home. Somehow the rain disappeared as soon as you saw them both and you wonder whether the supreme may have had something to do with that. They instantly take you inside, ushering you to the kitchen and Delia getting you out of your soaked coat.

„My god you’re freezing“ Wihemina whispers, noticing the disapproval in her eyes. „I’m- f-fine. I’m n-not c-cold. P-promise“ but your shivering state exposes the lie. „You are certainly not fine and you know I do not tolerate lying. Sit. Down“ the redhead instructs and you do as you are told before Cordelia softly runs her hands over your cheeks. „Can you tell me what happened exactly sweetheart?“ she whispers and you look at her through teary eyes before explaining.

„I finished work and I guess Billie was busy so I started walking home“ you explain and they both furrow their eyebrows, never knowing the medium to forget something so important as this. „Why didn‘t you call us darling?“ the supreme tuts and you mumble a quiet „I didn‘t want to bother you two“ before Wilhemina raises an eyebrow. „Sorry“ you whisper and give them a dopey smile, causing for the concern to leave them for a moment as they chuckle to themselves.

„I‘m gonna go and change“ you announce as you notice Billie‘s car parking outside and they nod quietly, Wilhemina‘s anger already flaring up as they watch you go. The medium walks inside, abandoning her bag and stepping out of her heels before a long sigh escapes her, shaking her curls a little to get rid of the remainders of rain, knowing she would have to do an extensive hair care routine tonight in order to have it looking not frizzy tomorrow morning. When she steps into the kitchen with her usual smile moments later, Cordelia stands there with a concerned expression while Wilhemina waits for her with her arms crossed.

„Ugh I had an awful day“ she sighs as she sits on one of the chairs and lights a cigarette. „Oh really?“ Wilhemina sarcastically questions and Cordelia rolls her eyes, already knowing exactly where this is heading. „What?“ Billie hisses but before the medium has a chance to ask any further, the redhead lets out her anger, her protectiveness over you showing. „Have you not forgotten anything maybe?“ she sighs but Billie simply shrugs, too caught up in her own world. „Oh for gods sake you gotta be kidding me Howard“ the redhead hisses before her eyes meet Cordelia‘s who simply stands and observes. „Honey you forgot Y/N“ she says softly, noticing Billie‘s distress and the clear signs she must have had an awful day in order to forget something this important.

The medium‘s eyes snap towards her, the clear signs of shock in her expression as it finally hits her. Guilt immediately consumes her, realizing that was the reason you had called her before. „Oh god“ she murmurs, putting out her cigarette quickly as Wilhemina‘s anger errupts again. „Yes and not only did she have to walk back through the pouring rain, she was also followed by some creep“ Wilhemina curses, causing the medium‘s eyes to widen. „What?!“ Billie asks before Cordelia kneels in front of her. „It‘s okay, we found her and she‘s safe and getting changed upstairs“ the supreme encourages, noticing the guilty tears threatening to spill down the blonde‘s cheek.

Neither of them realized you had been standing by the doorframe for a little while, having changed into some warm clothes and dried yourself up. You froze as soon as you heard the shouting, your anxiety errupting in an instance, caught in between wanting to comfort Billie and telling her it‘s really not a big deal and Mina‘s overprotectiveness. Not even Cordelia realized you are there, her supreme senses currently busy as she tries to navigate between her girlfriend‘s guilt and her other girlfriends anger, all while worried about your state upstairs. By the time she finally realizes you are there, she immediately walks over to you, noticing your shivering state but the other two don‘t realize, more shouting errupting in the silent kitchen.

„I can‘t believe you forgot“ the redhead continues, causing Billie to roll her eyes. „Honestly, why do you always breathe down my neck? I have had a really shitty day and I“ Billie tries to defend herself but before the arguing can continue, Cordelia‘s steady voice and presence echoes through the room. „Can you please stop yelling? you are scaring her“ she demands and they instantly stop, both of their features guilty as they see your frame hiding behind Cordelia. „Oh babydoll“ Billie whispers, as she instantly abandonds her seat and walks over to you. „I‘m so sorry“ she apologizes as her manicured hands cup both of your cheeks before pulling you into her arms. „Are you okay? god you‘re cold.. I‘m so sorry“ she apologizes and you simply hold onto her a little closer, feeling her warmth and your hands almost automatically travelling to her curls and playing with them.

„It‘s really okay Billie, I‘m not mad or sad“ you promise and she looks into your eyes and sees the honesty in them. „It‘s my fault for not calling anyone“ you admit, meeting Wilhemina‘s eyes and hoping she was gonna let this go, Cordelia equally pleading with the redhead. You stay in Billie‘s embrace for a while longer before the supreme offers some dinner to calm down and warm up and you all agree. Before you sit down, you walk to Wilhemina, taking her hand before giving her a gentle smile. „Thank you Mina“ you whisper and she knows exactly what you are thanking her for, always fighting your corner, always having your back no matter what. And for the first time tonight, a gentle smile meets your eyes and she squeezes your hand before guiding you to sit between her and Billie.

Dinner is spent in the comfortable atmosphere of each other, the four of you trying to look past what has happened. But no matter how much you all try, Billie remains silent, on the verge of tears before the dam finally breaks and her tears fall freely down her beautiful cheeks. „Billie, whats wrong?“ you ask as you are the first one to notice, your hand instantly finding hers and squeezing it a little. „I‘m just sorry, I had an awfully busy day and lots of last minute meetings about the new season and I just“ she cries and the three of you stop eating, Cordelia gently wiping the mediums tears and even Wilhemina feeling guilty, knowing she didn‘t exactly help the situation. Her eyes find the medium‘s with an apologetic smile and the medium can‘t help but look at you and apologize again. „It‘s really fine Billie“ you reassure.

„If it makes you feel any better, you are very pretty when you cry“ Wilhemina suddenly says, causing yours and Cordelia‘s eyes to meet at the redheads soft gesture and statement. „It does, thank you“ Billie sobs, a half small smile and frown on her face despite it all. And through Wilhemina‘s gentle words, knowing just how to cheer the medium up at times, the evening comes to a peaceful end, Cordelia helping Billie with her hair routine as she softly combes through her hair and dries it and Wilhemina and you already nestled in bed and waiting for your other two girlfriends to return.

„Thank you Mina“ you mumble as you snuggle closer into her chest. „But you know I‘m a big girl and can take care of myself“ you whisper barely audible and all you can hear is a low chuckle escaping her before she whispers. „No matter what or when, you will always be my little one“ she whispers as she instinctively pulls you closer and presses a kiss to your forehead. Moments later your girlfriends return and you snuggle up in each other‘s embraces, the events from earlier long forgotten as you are home.

[yourmomssidepiece]

𝑾𝒊𝒍𝒉𝒆𝒎𝒊𝒏𝒂 𝑽𝒆𝒏𝒂𝒃𝒍𝒆 𝑰𝒄𝒐𝒏𝒔

[dreamypqulson]

— my only sunshine

summary: you’ve been struggling in silence but it hasn’t gone unnoticed.

pairing: cordelia goode x reader

warnings: depression, anxiety, self-harm (pretty detailed, be careful)

word count: 2700

venting again lol

Your leg shaking up and down was becoming excessive. You could see the girls next to you becoming annoyed, but you hardly realized that you were doing it. Tears pooled in your eyes and it burned so badly to hold them in. Why does Cordelia have to look at me so much? Why can't she just glance over me like everyone else and let me wallow away in the corner?

Everyone knew that you were Cordelia's special girl. You didn't think it had anything to do with your powers, she just liked you. And you liked her. But that was it; you were both too afraid to acknowledge it. What she wasn’t aware of was your history with mental health, which you tried so hard to conceal from her.

You don't think you were doing a very good job hiding it this time. How could you hide the fact that you don't want to live anymore?

Everyone knew you looked terrible lately. Madison had even pointed it out. Your eyes were dark, and hollow, and you just didn't look like yourself. Madison said you were just a freak that was too caught up in your studies to barely allow yourself some time to sleep, but Cordelia knew that wasn't true. Matter of fact, it was the complete opposite.

Cordelia dismissed yet another class that had completely gone through one ear and out the other. Spacing out is the one time that you actually feel safe and you so happen to be the best at it during class.

Everyone rushed out. You were a little slower because you were so exhausted and picking up your books felt like you were ripping open the cuts on your wrist. You thought you could feel like blood dripping down, but it might've just been your anxiety freaking you out.

"Oh, y/n, could you stay for a minute, love," Cordelia asked when you were by the doorway, ever so sweet but you still bit the inside of your mouth until you could taste blood.

You spun slowly on your heels. You loved Cordelia but you didn't want to stay. You were terrified of confrontation and you just wanted to throw yourself into your bed again.

You didn't respond and kept a great distance between you and Cordelia. She was so warm, she was your comfort, and you ached to have her hold you, but you just wanted the darkness right now.

She still walked closer towards you and you almost started to cry from the nerves. You started scratching at your band-aid covered wrists. You don't know why you do that when your nervous, it just feels good in the moment.

She looked down at your arms, then back up at you. Does she know? Did your sleeve rise when you went to reach for something? "Relax, honey. You're not in trouble. I just want to check on you."

"I'm fine," it came out weak.

She raised an eyebrow at you and gave you that look. Anyone could tell that you weren't okay, it was just a matter of who would be there for you when you fall apart.

Your bottom lip started to tremble. A clear indication that you were ready to break down. Cordelia just watched, letting you control yourself before she made you explode completely.

"How about we take a walk outside, around the house, and get some fresh air, yeah?" You nodded and you were suddenly following her out the door. Anything someone says to you hasn't really been processing in your head. You truly just feel like a leaf being blown in every direction.

It was nice out, slightly chilly with a breeze, but it did not seem to snap you from your state of mind. It was quiet for a minute before Cordelia began talking to you again. You knew she was trying to distract you from your thoughts, but it's not really want you want right now.

"So what have you been up to, missy? Are you still writing?" She looked over at you, gently smiling. She loved reading all of your work, but it had been a few weeks since she had. She's been a little bit busy and you've been locking yourself in your room.

"Yeah, a little bit, I guess." It was a complete lie, but your didn't feel like getting into the fact that you could hardly bring yourself to even get out of bed, let alone write.

She wanted to have a full conversation with you, but you weren't having it. She just became silent as you both finished the walk around the building. She always takes you to walk around the city with her, but she had an inkling that you weren't going to want to leave the property.

Cordelia didn't want to let you go yet. She had a bad feeling and she knew something just wasn't right with you. She felt uneasy. But she couldn't hold you back when you told her you had to go study. You would never pass up hanging out with Cordelia to study, and she knew that, but she just let you go.

When you got to your room, it was all messy. Had you had the energy to keep it as tidy as you always did then maybe your anger levels wouldn't have increased when you walked in. You decided to ignore it and step over the pile of clothes and make your way into the bathroom.

There, you dug through your drawer, looking for the blade that you kept hidden in the back. It was the one place that nobody could accidentally stumble upon it.

You sat down on the closed toilet lid and pulled up your left sleeve. Ripping off the bandaids had not even hurt as much as they should, you didn’t even flinch. You began cutting any free skin on your inner arms that you could. You hated that there wasn't that much room anymore due to all the other cuts, but you just couldn't seem to stop.

Sometimes it made you feel crazy but it mostly made you get some release. You knew you should at least try to stop with summer approaching but getting clean is never your top priority in the moment. Not when your arms start aching for more.

You just sit there with a blank face and watch as drops of blood start pooling at the thin lines and then you start dabbing it away with a tissue and apply some pressure.

Your heart absolutely drops when you hear a knock on your bathroom door. You weren’t expecting a visitor at your room, but living in this busy house, you never really get alone time.

"Y/n, it's me darling. Dinners ready." How could you have been so in your head that you lost track of time. You hardly even had an appetite but you knew that Cordelia was already having suspicions about you. You just had to act like everything was alright.

"Okay I'll be right down." Instead of wrapping your arm up, you simply just ran it under water for a moment and then pulled your sleeve down. It definitely stung, but you were starting to enjoy it.

When you walked out of the bathroom, Cordelia was waiting on your bed for you. You were expecting her to already be downstairs with the other girls, but she clearly had other plans.

"You're always neat, sweetie. What's going on with you?" You shrugged again, and soon, you thought, she's going to forget what your voice even sounds like. You began to walk out your room, and you can hear her shuffling behind you before she finally catches up. "Not in the mood to talk today?"

You'd rather Cordelia just hold you and whisper sweet nothings in your ear without expecting an answer. But at the moment, she's completely worried and just wants you to open up. "Not really, Cordelia."

She lets you slide again, but she can't take her eyes off of you all throughout dinner. She's sitting at the head of the table and you're at the first seat next to her. When you reach for your plate, she notices something that she wishes she didn't. She wishes it wasn't even there.

Your sleeve slides up, only slightly, and she can see smeared crimson on your wrist. Her heart sink and she has to swallow down the lump in her throat. After that, she cannot even look at you, or anyone for that matter, for the rest of dinner. She wasn't angry or embarrassed of you. Just so, so upset over the fact that her girl was hurting so badly.

Dinner finishes fairly fast. You notice there's not much chatter, and it must be from Cordelia's lack of interest in any of the conversation. You start worry that you hurt her feelings. She's always catching up with you and the girls - mostly you - during dinner, but today she hadn't even said a word.

"Y/n, meet me in my room please," Cordelia says, and it sounds almost cold compared to her typical soft voice. She walks away and heads towards her bedroom and your heart completely sinks. You fidget with the hem of your shirt and make way towards her room.

The door is ajar and by the time you're there, Cordelia is sitting on her bed in tears. This is it; she's going to kick you out.

"Cordelia?" You say and gather her attention back to you. She quickly wipes away her tears like you weren't supposed to see that, but there's no hiding her red, puffy eyes.

"Sit down please," she hardly looks you in the eyes. It's terrifying.

"I—" you attempt to argue. She has no part in that.

"Just sit down, y/n."

You sit beside her and it's so close that you bunch up your sleeve in your hand. You're consistently terrified of it rising. "Show me your arm."

"What—"

"Show me, y/n. I know what's going on. I know that you are hurting yourself."

You hug your arm closer to your body and can feel the sting like it's mocking you. Tears are instantly sprung to your eyes and it's clear that this situation isn't just a big misunderstanding.

"No! Leave me alone, Cordelia. What is wrong with you? Why would I ever do that." But you do do it and those words hurt so much. You wouldn't ever be so harsh to Cordelia, but you're not in the right mental state right now.

Cordelia's crying again and all you can think about is cutting up your arm for making her feel like that. You need to hurt yourself to pay for the faults you're causing and Cordelia can see right through that.

Her voice is very quiet and desperate as she speaks, "Baby, please. Please let me help you, I can't just pretend that it's not going on. I care about you too much."

This completely causes you to break down. You never had someone truly care about you. This is something that you've been yearning for forever.

You melt into Cordelia's body and she hugs you tightly, as if she let go, all of the pieces of you would just shatter everywhere. You can feel her tears start leaking through onto your shirt and you know she feels it too. "Please, y/n," she whispers, "I love you. Let me in, it's just me, it's only Cordelia."

You finally pull back and wipe away your tears. It doesn't stop another fresh batch of warm tears to roll down your face. You don't want to keep hiding this anymore. You need help. You need someone. You need her.

You take a deep breath and tug up your sleeve. You can't even bare to look at her face. Ashamed, and embarrassed, and scared. But you hear a sharp intake of breath from her. The bleeding from the cuts before dinner only made it look far worse on your fucked up skin.

"Oh, my baby," she sniffles and grabs your arm, gently. Your heart is too heavy. She's trying so hard to be strong for you. "Why," she looks up at you with watery eyes, waiting for an honest answer.

"Everything's just too much, Delia. I don't want to be me anymore. I hate being me, I hate living!" You started sobbing again and the crack in your voice doesn't go unnoticed. This is new and weird and you don't like it. You don't want to talk about yourself anymore. You can see her heart breaking in half from your words.

"My little sunshine...do you know I love you? I love the person that you say you hate so much." You don't have anything to say to that. Cordelia loves you. And you don't know how, but she does. You don't know how this whole could have any room for the broken half of you. “I couldn’t live without seeing your pretty smile and listening to you ramble to me about all the little things you love. So if you hate living so much, then let me love it for the both of us until you learn to.”

It’s silent for a couple moments that pass by until she looks back down at your arm again. It's a bloody mess and you don't want her to look anymore but she's still holding on. "Can I clean it? Can I do that for you?"

You nod and then you're being walked to her bathroom. It's bigger than yours and the entire room smells like her lavender shampoo that you always love taking in when she hugs you. She helps you to sit up on the counter. Your arm feels heavy from all the attention being on it but she so carefully cleans away the blood and it makes you feel a little bit better.

She covers it with bandaids. Not because she is disgusted by it. She's not at all. She just doesn't want anything infecting the fresh ones.

When she’s done, she lifts your arm up to her lips and, so delicately, kisses the covered cuts. A few tears start rolling down your face again. You’re too emotional for this. “Delia…”

“I love you,” she looks back up to you. Her words are so clear and genuine. “Come to me. I don’t care where we are or what time it is. Come to me whenever you feel like this.” You nod, your bottom lip trembling. She reaches her hand up and brushes her thumb over your lips. “It’s not going to be easy but i’m going to help you. We can make a plan and safe alternatives, anything that’ll help.”

She leans in and kisses your forehead, slow and light and your heart beats a little bit faster. “I love you too, Cordelia,” you croak out and she gives you that little smile.

“Come on, my little sunshine, let’s get some rest, hm?” She grabs your hand and brings you to her own bed. You’ve never slept with Cordelia before but it all feels natural. You lay your head on her chest and her arms wrap around your body. For once, you feel a sliver of happiness that you’ve been deprived of for so long.

The room is silent besides her soft breaths and the sound of cars rushing by. You finally break that silence after a few minutes.

“Delia?”

“Hm?” She peaks down a you and a small smile is present on her face again.

“Why do you always call me your little sunshine?” You say it with a slight giggle in your voice. You love all the nicknames she has for you, but this one stands out and makes your heart warm.

“Because, sweetie, I was in a very similar situation as you. But then you came into my life and suddenly there was light again.”

You looked up at her and bite your lip. You could’ve never imagined a woman like her feeling as terrible as you do. She’s too…perfect. But maybe, suddenly, you won’t feel so ashamed of your emotions anymore. You lean forward and place your sweet lips on hers. Just for a moment, for the first time in your life, you see a bit of sunlight shine through the cracks of your eyelids.

taglist: @loverofallthingssarah @goodeday2u @lanawinters-ily @strawberryshorttcakkee @sapphicforsarahh @ahsfan05 @stayevildarling @isle-of-earle @cordithatgurl @mistysswampmud @billiedeansbitch @billiedeanspearls @cigaretteology @favoriteredhead @lovingsarah @cordeliass @citizenoftheworld-stuff-blog @multi-royalty-main

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[marsthebabie]

Work trip

Wilhelmina Venable x Cordelia Goode x reader 

Tw: Attachment issues, maybe cussing, Mina being mean.

Momma is Mina

Mommy is Cordelia

"NO! Please mommy! Please don't go" I cry holding onto Mommy's dress. "Baby please let go of my dress. I have to go. I'll be back soon. I promise" Mommy says trying to leave. I just cry harder as Momma removes my fingers from Mommy's dress. "Come on Angel let mommy go. She has to go on a work trip" Momma says softly to me. I reach my hands out to mommy as I sob loudly. Mommy kisses me on the head quickly before walking out the door with her suitcase.

"It's okay Love. Shh easy baby" Momma says stroking my hair . Usually I wouldn't do this but I want Mommy. I smack momma's hand away and I instantly regret it knowing what happens when I act up. Momma swiftly picks me up and sets me down in the corner. " 3 minuets in time out. We do not hit" Momma says walking away. I curl up in the corner and cry missing my mommy so much. Momma comes back when my time is up. She sighs as she watches me cry. "Oh honey. She'll be back don't worry" Momma says but I just continue to cry. I decide to crawl to the front door and wait for mommy to come home. After a while momma comes to me.

"Alright Y/N this is enough. Come on" Momma says sternly. I don't move an inch. Momma sighs before picking me up. I thrash around in her arms and start sobbing loudly. "P-put me down! I need to waits for mommy" I cry. "Y/N, you need to stop this. Just grow up for pete's sake" Momma spits out. I manage to get out of her hold. "I hate you! You a big meanie" I yell before running to my room sobbing  and slamming the door shut. I curl up on the bed with the shirt that mommy wore because it smells like her. I sobbed into her shirt and I eventually fall asleep from crying. I wake up to someone calling my name and a hand stroking my hair. I sit up and see momma. I instantly start sobbing and I wrap my arms around her.

"I'm so sorry momma! I don't hate you. I'm so sorry momma! Please don't leave me" I say sobbing into her chest. She wraps her arms around me and softly rubs my back. "Shh it's okay sweetling. And baby, I would never hate you or leave you for anything. You are way too important to me. And I love you so much. I'm sorry for being mean and not understanding cutie"Momma says softly. I cuddle close to her and we decide to watch movies together for the rest of the day. A couple of days go by and Momma and I are cuddling on the couch.

When all of a sudden I hear the door unlock and I quickly sit up. I stare at the front door as it opens and in comes mommy. I quickly get up tripping on a blanket and I get up and run into mommy's arms. "Mommy"I beam wrapping my arms around her. She shuts the door and picks me up. I hold onto her tighter as I start sobbing into her hair. "Oh honey don't cry" She says sweetly. "I-I sowwy..I-i jwust miss chu so much" I say sobbing. "Aw baby, I missed you too" Mommy says kissing my head.Mommy carried me to the couch and sat down next to momma. I soon stop crying and start playing with mommy's hair. "How was she" Mommy asked momma making me pause and look at momma. "we had...some issues. But this little angel and I worked through it and she behaved very well" Momma says winking at me making me giggle.

[prplocks]

♡☆♡ american horror story wallpaper

reblog if you save ▪︎

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[deliasbabe]

Take Me Back to Eden- Venable x Reader Masterlist

Will be updated as new parts are added!

Part 1

Part 2

Part 3

Part 4

Part 5 (Coming soon)

[imagines-ahs]

Chapter Fifty: Amaranth.

Summary: Wilhemina Venable felt it was finally time to leave Kineros Robotics and get a job with people who weren’t such morons like Jeff and Mutt. What she didn’t expect, however, was for her new boss to be so damn insufferable. She didn’t expect to fall in love with her, either.

Tag List: @mayfair-fleur @mistysswampmud @paulsonsratched @msvenablx @notmeellaannyy @rwoolfe @golddustdykes​ @lovingsarah @slut-for-sarah @geinobinarie​ (message me to be added if interested!)

“I said no, of course.” Venable watched how Billie’s chest had begun to move a little faster. She’s nervous. Wilhemina could feel herself starting to grow overwhelmed, and Billie Dean’s fingers no longer felt right tangled in her own. As gentle as she could, Venable pulled her hand away. Billie blinked once, glancing down at their hands. The look that settled on Billie Dean’s face caused Wilhemina to feel even more disappointed in herself. I’m hurting her. But her whole body refused to allow itself to be touched, to be felt, to be noticed as something that existed in physical form. Billie only nodded, waiting for Venable to say something else, anything else. Wilhemina’s jaw was tense again. “B-Billie, what happened between you and Terry?”

For a second, everything Billie Dean could hear was a faint buzz. Slowly, her body recovered from the sudden rush of adrenaline that had just washed down. She licked her dry lips, blinking once or twice. “What did she tell you?” I should have talked to her about it. I should have done it before she had the chance. Venable didn’t answer, she only looked away. Billie frowned a little more, holding her emotions back the best she could. “Wilhie, what did she tell you?”

Wilhie. Venable stared down at the floor, body refusing to allow her voice to come out. She pushed it through. “She just… she told me y-you did the same to her— to Terry… d-date her, I m-mean. And then you—you got tired and just… discarded her.”

“I never dated her,” Billie quickly said. “We went out a few times, but we—we never dated.” Her heart had accelerated its pace, for Billie Dean knew where this was going. “There w-were no feelings, and she was not fired b-because of that. It had nothing to do with o-our so called relationship.” She saw right there in Venable’s eyes how she didn’t seem to believe her. Fuck! Honey eyes filled up with tears. “Wilhemina, I d-don’t know what she told you, b-but it was nothing l-like us. Nothing. It was never serious. We only—we hooked up a few times, but we never even went out on a proper date.”

“Will you get tired of me, too?” It was barely a whisper, but one that came in a strong tone and as cold as ice. Venable hated herself for allowing it to come out like that, for allowing her walls to control her like that. Her posture was rigid again, both hands on the cane and head up high. Defensive. Scared.

“I will not.” There was no doubt in that. Billie gulped the lump in her throat. “I d-didn’t get tired of h-her. No one k-knows what happened.” A tear slid down. Billie Dean paid no attention to it. Her hands ached to just hold the woman in front of her. “W-Wilhie… Wilhie, please… I—I don’t k-know what else to tell y-you.” Another tear slipped down, followed by another, and another. She sniffled, never once looking away from Venable. Stop crying, for fuck’s sake!

“Tell me w-what happened.” Wilhemina’s voice trembled, betraying the coldness of her posture. Too many things went through her mind, each one of them taking her to a worst place.

With her eyebrows drawing close together, Billie Dean sniffled. She nodded as she took a deep breath. “Not here.” Venable frowned. “Meet me in the garage in five minutes.”

“Why?”

“T-trust me?”

Wilhemina bit her inner cheek. Staring at those honey oceans that always carried so much kindness, she wondered how could she ever say no to Billie Dean. How could she ever deny her anything when she stared at her with eyes so full of tears and so full of fear. She nodded, and in a gush of even more trust, reached to squeeze one of Billie’s hands. I never meant to hurt her. “I do.”

Taking another deep breath, Billie squeezed Venable’s hand back. “I p-promise I’ll give you a-all the answers.”

Wilhemina nodded. The sight was breaking her heart. Hesitantly, she let Billie Dean’s hand go and followed back to her table, heart beating fast.

Alone in her office, Billie Dean sat back down on her chair. She tried taking a deep breath, but a sob cut through. She felt ashamed. She felt judged by something Venable hadn’t even seen yet. Covering her eyes with her palms, Billie forced her body to calm down; this time, air filled her lungs slowly, completely. Her body craved for nicotine yet again, and she didn’t have another choice but to give in. Reaching for her purse, Billie Dean grabbed a cigarette from the pack she had there along with a lighter and walked to the huge window of her office, opening it carefully. She took drag after drag with eyes staring at nothing at all, focused on blurring colors as she kept herself trapped in all the thoughts that ran through her mind. What if she decides I’m too much for her? Finding someone like Venable had been so hard… it wouldn’t have been anyone but Wilhemina.

It didn’t take long for Venable to get up and walk to the elevator, nail picking on the skin of her thumb— an unconscious, nervous habit. She did notice how Emma stared at her, clearly curious, clearly angry, clearly wanting to get up and follow her to know what was happening. She wouldn’t have the nerve. As Wilhemina stepped into the elevator and the doors closed, she sighed in relief for being the only one there. Her stomach turned as the floors started to go down, mind on Billie, focus on Billie, heart on Billie. What could be so bad? What even could have happened that could be so bad? Why am I so scared? Venable knew why… what if she were being used? What if the Billie Dean she knew was a lie carefully constructed to play some sort of trick on her? I knew it was too good to be true. Billie gave her no reason to think that way, but the part of Wilhemina that refused to see any good on herself screamed louder. As the elevator stopped and the doors opened again, Venable hesitantly followed into a more secluded area of the garage. She hadn’t seen Billie Dean pass through the main office, which meant she wasn’t there yet. She stood there waiting, nibbling on her inner cheek at the same pace her nail dug on her skin. Not even five minutes later, the doors to the elevator opened to reveal Billie, with her sunglasses on and purse in hand. Venable watched her from the corner of her eye, hand squeezing the cane harshly.

As Billie Dean looked around in search of Wilhemina, she caught herself still sniffling the remaining of her tears. Her eyes had grown red and swollen, and her mascara had been all smudged—she tried wiping it off, and at least it got somewhat presentable. Sunglasses were always a lifesaver, though. Her head picked up as she saw a hint of purple, and she watched as Venable stood there so nervous she couldn’t hide it this time. Billie sighed. Please, don’t change your mind. “Hi,” she said softly as she approached Wilhemina.

Turning around, Venable smiled a little. “Hi. She’s wearing glasses. Wilhemina wanted to lean closer and kiss her lips; wanted to hold her hand, comfort her and caress her fingers. But her body refused to allow it, standing on the ground with feet glued on it and refusing to draw closer.

Billie gulped again, eyes falling down. “My car is—is to the left.”

“Your car?” Venable frowned.

Billie Dean nodded. “I need—I want to show you the whole thing.” Her eyes hesitantly moved back to brown ones. Wilhemina looked even more confused. I won’t be able to wait until we get there. Every second that Venable stared at her like that broke her heart a tiny bit more. But also, what was the best to do? Wilhemina was a very logical person, and so perhaps the best was, indeed, to wait.

Venable’s first reaction was to deny getting away from the workplace while she was, technically, working. But Billie Dean was the boss, and even if she weren’t, Billie Dean was her priority right now. So she nodded and followed Billie along until they got to her car. “Thank you,” she nearly whispered as she got in, holding her cane on her lap as Billie Dean closed the door.

“Of course.” Billie walked to the driver’s side and got in as well. She took a deep breath as she buckled up, and then she took her glasses off and turned on the car. Wilhemina watched her closely, eyes tracing each and every line of her. I’m so embarrassed.

Her eyes are blotchy. Venable’s thumb was back at picking on her skin. “Where are we going?” She asked after a second. The car was already moving, and as Wilhemina took a deep breath she realized just how much it smelled like Billie Dean. I want to hold her.

“My house.” Billie licked her lips as she looked over to the sides before moving forward.

“Your house?” What could they possibly do at Billie Dean’s house? Venable was lost; completely lost. She watched as Billie nodded. “Why?”

Billie bit her inner cheek, fingers silently drumming on the wheel. Her stomach kept on twirling. “The… the documents are a-all there.” Her eyes started to grow teary again. She sniffled.

Documents? Wilhemina was starting to grow worried—not for her feelings, not for her trauma, but for Billie Dean. She had seen Billie worried and nervous like that before, and it was never something good. Reach for her hand. Venable eyed them on the wheel. “Billie, you’re worrying me.”

Wiping a tear away, Billie Dean sighed. After a minute or two, she finally gathered the courage to speak again. “I’m scared,” she breathed out. They stopped at a red light, so she was able to look at Venable.

Oh no. Wilhemina didn’t know what to do, how to react, how to comfort Billie when she herself needed comfort. “W-why?” Her voice trembled. Her nerves started to grow agitated. Hiding her feelings had become hard all of a sudden.

“B-because.” Billie Dean sniffled again. Her eyes refused to stay dry. “Terry, she… no one k-knows about i-it. I’ve been d-dealing with that alone, n-no one knows. And I’m scared y-you’ll look at me differently when you f-find out.”Gulping yet again, Venable shook her head. The light turned green, they moved forward. Billie kept on sniffling as she drove, wiping the running tears away the best she could.

Wilhemina had grown quiet again. Would anything be able to make me look at her differently? It wasn’t fair to think something could; not with how Billie Dean had treated her so far, not with the amount of comfort that woman brought to her. She wouldn’t do something that could cause me to look at her differently. Struggling to pass through the walls, Venable began to dig a hole. She bit her lower lip and closed her eyes, thumb now bleeding. I don’t want to lose her. Haven’t my ways taken too much from me already? Every single time Wilhemina happened to be struggling around Billie, she had been anything but kind, loving, sweet. It’s not fair I don’t do the same. Venable wanted to do the same. She dug and dug and dug until she could see a small amount of the outside, and then she opened her eyes again. Billie Dean kept her waterfall eyes on the road. “B-Billie,” she barely managed to whisper. They stopped at a red light again. Their eyes met. She’s terrified. “I… I l-like you for who you a-are. That’s n-not changing.” Taking all the strength she could, Wilhemina reached for Billie Dean’s free hand. She tangled their fingers and caressed it, feeling the soft skin against her own.

With her face scrunching up with tears, Billie shook her head. Her eyes fell down to their hands, and she squeezed Venable’s back as if it were the last time she would be able to do so. “I-I’m ashamed of what happened,” that was all she managed to whisper.

Wilhemina’s frown grew. She knew that feeling well… almost too well. She kept on caressing the fingers tangled in hers, watching as Billie Dean cried more and more. I should stop talking. She’s driving. Billie had to calm down. “Just… just know I’m here with y-you.”

With another nod, Billie Dean got back to driving. She sniffled nonstop, trying to bring her nerves down. With her hand tangled in Venable’s, her chest filled with air a tiny bit easier.

The rest of the ride was quiet. Billie used the time to calm herself down as best as she could, and Wilhemina never once let her hand go; it was the best she could do right now. When they got to Billie Dean’s house, her eyes were dry and only slightly red. She reached for her purse and opened the garage, gently letting go of Venable’s hand as she parked the car. When the engine stopped, Billie took a deep breath. So did Wilhemina.

“Eleanor must be here,” Billie Dean broke the silence. It took a minute for Venable to remember whom Eleanor was, but she nodded anyways. Billie got out of the car and walked to the other side, ready to open the door for Wilhemina; she was already getting out. I need another cigarette. As they followed inside, Venable caught herself regretting not bringing her purse along. She had her bottle of Valium there, and even though she had already taken one today, the fear of a panic attack raising was very much present right now. Billie Dean didn’t dare offering a hand to Wilhemina. Right now, she honestly didn’t feel like she deserved to be held by anyone. The living room was substantially tidier this time Venable noticed, and the whole house smelled like a flower she couldn’t quite point to. “Eleanor?” Billie called. In no more than five minutes, a blonde, pale woman walked into the living room holding a cloth.

“Hello, Ms. Howard. I didn’t expect you here so early.”

Ms. Howard. Billie Dean had already asked Eleanor not to call her like that, but she didn’t have the energy to bring that up right now. “It’s alright. Is everything okay? Could you get settled well?”

“Yes. Thank you, Ms. Howard.” The woman smiled. Wilhemina watched how she eyed her once, smile never leaving her lips. She also took notice of how, even though very much distressed, Billie Dean was still as nice as always. How can I ever see her differently? “I’m cleaning the downstairs bathroom and the pool area right now. Should I clean something else first? Would you like me to prepare you lunch?”

Billie shook her head. “It’s perfect as it is, Eleanor. Thank you so much. There’s no need to prepare us lunch, and when you feel like eating, use the house phone and order whatever you’d like, as always.”

“Right.” Eleanor nodded. “Thank you, Ms. Howard. I’ll go back to doing my job, if you need anything just call me.”

“Alright.” Billie Dean offered her the best smile she could. Excusing herself, Eleanor disappeared on the back door. Taking another deep breath, Billie turned to Venable. Going upstairs is hard for her. “I’ll go grab the documents.”

Wilhemina nodded; her chest clenched from how defeated Billie Dean looked. As Billie disappeared upstairs, Venable caught herself sighing. She walked to the couch and took a seat, hands nervously squeezing the cane. Her eyes scanned the room she had seen only once before, trying to distract herself with the details she could capture: the awards on the shelf, the TV that could almost be mistaken by a painting of birds, the beautiful chandelier. It’s all Billie Dean. Venable adored everything. She looked down at her hands and noticed dry blood on the thumb she had been picking on. She bit her lower lip. I should wash it. But Eleanor had said she was cleaning the bathroom, and she didn’t even know where it was. Plus, she didn’t feel comfortable just walking around Billie Dean’s house. I wouldn’t mind if she did so in mine. Somehow it felt different. Footsteps took her away from her thoughts, and so Wilhemina looked up from her hands to watch as Billie approached her with a folder in hand, head down. She gulped.

Here we go. Billie took a deep breath as she sat down next to Venable. Without saying anything, she just handed her the folder. Wilhemina stared at her in confusion. Billie Dean licked her dry lips. “It’s all there,” she said quietly.

It was hesitant, but Venable slowly began to read the papers. Honey eyes watched her closely, already wanting to grow teary again. Fiery eyebrows kept on drawing closer together. I should have brought my glasses. Taking a deep breath as she read the first document, her eyes grew in size as she realized what she was reading. “She’s blackmailing you?!” Wilhemina turned to look at Billie Dean, whom only nodded with her head down. Venable’s frown grew. “Why are you ashamed of it? She’s the one who should be ashamed.”

“Keep—keep on going…”

Instantly, Wilhemina did so. As she turned to the next page, a few screenshots were printed there, along with chunks of texts explaining the context of them. Venable kept on reading further, and suddenly, when she moved to another page, explicit pictures of Billie—clearly taken without her consent—were printed right there, in color and all. Wilhemina’s eyes grew even more and she quickly closed the file. As she moved to look at Billie Dean, she found her still looking down at the floor, lip trembling as she held back the tears. Venable shook her head. “Billie… Billie, look at me.” She saw the way Billie Dean squeezed her eyes shut, tears cascading down. Venable bit her lip harshly. Just grab her hand already. Hesitantly and ignoring the voices in her head that screamed Billie would get mad at her somehow, Venable reached for one of her hands. Billie Dean opened her eyes and slowly looked at Wilhemina. She offered her a sad smile. “Angel… this is not y-your fault.” Too many things spiraled through her mind, but Wilhemina was determined to keep her focus on Billie. What if she’s lying? There was no way Billie Dean would lie about that, with proof and everything. And Venable knew it. Still, her mind tried taking what was good from her, as it always did. Not this time. Not Billie Dean. Trusting was so fucking hard… but Billie deserved it. She had deserved every single leap of faith she had taken for her.

Seeing Wilhemina through the tears was hard, and so Billie Dean clenched her hand for dear life. Her ears buzzed with adrenaline and shame, body shaking slightly. “Those p-pictures… I’ve… she is threatening t-to sell t-them—“ a sob cut through. Billie shook her head and covered her eyes with her palm, sniffling deeply.

Venable shook her head as her blood started to boil. Who the fuck does she think she is? She clenched her jaw harshly. Wilhemina saw red. She wanted to let Billie Dean know just what she thought about that woman, and she almost started to speak before she forced herself to stop: Saturday morning slipped in her mind, how she had exploded when she heard about the threats from Emma, and how that had made Billie uncomfortable, scared. And that was the last thing she wanted right now. So Venable took a deep breath and found a way to shove her rage aside somewhere—anywhere. And then her mind got quiet. And her body stopped trembling. And she found herself… sad. Sad for seeing what the world did to Billie Dean despite it being cruel to herself, too. And her eyes grew misty, so misty they slowly overflowed. But she didn’t care; not now, not with a person she cared so much. What were emotions if not rage? For the first time in a long time, Wilhemina simply felt. “Billie…” She moved closer, because she trusted Billie Dean would never scream at her for showing affection. “Billie Dean… come h-here.” She let her hand go to wrap an arm around her shoulders, pulling her closer until Billie laid her head on her chest. And then she cradled her tightly, lovingly, fingers tangling in blonde hair and caressing it. Billie Dean kept on sobbing loudly while she clenched everything Wilhemina she could reach. Venable felt her cheeks getting wetter and wetter, but she simply let it be. Her nose buried into Billie’s hair, taking a deep breath. “It’s okay,” she whispered. The sound of Billie Dean’s sobs was one she didn’t think she had ever heard before, and it caused Venable to wonder just how long had she been holding them back, how long had she been postponing all these emotions she was meant to let go so long ago. Billie had always told Wilhemina she needed a break, and perhaps the break was not only physical. The urge to protect something wasn’t usual for Venable—it had happened only twice her whole life, first with Olivia, and then with Purpura—but it was undeniable how it had been growing with Billie Dean; perhaps now it had reached its peak.

As much as Billie tried, she just couldn’t take a proper breath, she just couldn’t stop the sobs from cutting through—so she accepted it. She accepted the fear, the shame, the anger at herself and whatever else and simply cried. She cried and cried as she held onto Wilhemina, trying to trade all her pain for lavender so only the purple crowded her senses and emotions. Her eyes hurt, her nose had grown red, and her body had finally stopped shaking after what seemed to be hours. When she finally gathered enough strength to look up at Venable again, she found her cheeks wet as well, eyes caring concern, comfort, worry and care. She sniffled the best she could and pulled away to properly look at her. “I f-feel like a whore,” she murmured lowly. Wilhemina blinked twice, clearly surprised by the words. “I feel s-so stupid with t-these pictures… how could I not see w-what she was doing?” Hadn’t she cried all she had inside, more tears would for sure come one more time. Billie Dean took a deep, shaky breath. She reached for one of Venable’s hands again, caressing it between her own. “I-I’m so ashamed of it all… I’m so scared y-you’ll think I-I do that with everyone.”

Instantly, Wilhemina shook her head. “Don’t say that, Billie…” Only now she reached to wipe her cheeks clean. “She took advantage of you, none of that is your fault.”

“B-but I did sleep with her because I wanted to.”

Ouch. The thought bothered Venable. She focused on logic. “And there’s nothing wrong with that. But she chose to take advantage, she chose to take those pictures without your consent, and that was entirely on her.” Wilhemina did her best to keep her voice caring, soft.

Billie Dean sighed. “We never e-even went out on a date… it was p-purely sex… meaningless… stupid.” She shook her head and looked away, back at the floor. Venable gulped uncomfortably; it was definitely not pleasant to think about Billie kissing someone else, let alone having sex with them. It was a tough realization for Wilhemina, to understand that she was, in fact, jealous. Not that it mattered right now, not that it mattered at all. So many forgotten emotions rolled through her body, making it hard to think clearly. “I think w-we saw each other maybe f-four or five times… in s-six months. I d-didn’t feel good about it anymore… about feeling u-used the next day, every t-time.” Slowly, honey eyes moved back to brown ones. Venable squeezed her hand gently, encouraging her to keep going. “I t-told her I’d love t-to remain friends, b-but I didn’t want the sex anymore. She g-got really mad at me, told me I had been leaning her on, that I s-should have been honest from day one. I w-was… I t-told her after it h-happened the first time, after a p-party for wrapping up the last season of the show, we w-were both drunk… I barely remember it.” Billie shook her head. ���I t-told her it h-had been a mistake, she offered for u-us to be casual… I figured i-it wouldn’t be a problem, s-she saw other people, she seemed nice e-enough even though I k-knew there was nothing romantic there for m-me…” A low, bitter chuckle left Billie Dean’s lips. She sighed. “Her w-work had never been the b-best, but she d-did the job and that w-was sufficient… or so I thought. I e-ended up finding numerous mistakes some time later, two o-or three months after w-we stopped seeing each other. I tried t-talking to her, a-asked her to be more careful… she i-insisted I was punishing her for s-some reason… so I h-had to fire her. She told everyone i-it had to do with our relationship—we d-didn’t even have a relationship, n-not in the way she implied, and she was aware of that. Gosh, she tried sleeping w-with Jenny for fuck’s sake!” Wilhemina watched Billie quietly, giving her the time she needed to let it all out. “A day a-after many accusatory t-texts, she sent me t-the first picture. A week later, I h-had all of them along w-with threats of selling them t-to the media if I d-didn’t agree t-to pay her a fee for f-firing her—which had already b-been paid, but she demanded for more. I g-gave in at first… she kept on asking for more… finally, I c-contacted my lawyer. We are… we’re building a c-case…” Billie Dean looked down again. It was all laid out now, clear as day for Venable to see and understand and judge as she pleased. Billie had nothing else to lose. I should have never slept with her, Billie’s mind shouted, I should have contacted my lawyer before, I should have stopped after the first time, I should have, I should have, I should have, I should have…

Digesting everything would take some time, but Wilhemina certainly would. She kept on caressing Billie Dean’s hand, heart beating fast, eyes glossy. What could she even say to that? Billie stared at her as if she were waiting for Venable to decide her faith on death penalty or not, eyes big, lip trapped between her teeth. Wilhemina blinked once, causing matching tears to slip down. Billie frowned in fear. “I d-don’t know what t-to tell you,” she began, slow and gentle and caring and just so unsure of how to word all these foreign emotions. “But I’m here for you. I’m h-here with you. This is not your fault, Billie Dean… none of it is your fault. You did nothing w-wrong, and it breaks m-my heart to see how much that woman i-is causing you to suffer.” Another tear slipped down. “You don’t deserve it,” she nearly breathed out, cheeks getting drenched again. She fought not to allow her eyes to overflow too much, but it was useless.

I’ve never seen her cry before. It shouldn’t, but it caused Billie to worry even more. In her nervous state, comprehending the size of the intimacy she had just reached was nearly impossible. “Don’t c-cry…” With her free hand, Billie Dean carefully wiped a tear away from Venable’s cheeks.

“Why were you so a-shamed of telling me that?” Wilhemina leaned her cheek on Billie’s palm, eyes and hand never leaving hers.

Billie Dean gulped. Her thumb caressed Venable’s cheekbone, stomach twisting and turning in nervous patterns still. “Because I j-judge myself… so I was s-scared you’d judge me, too… and I would l-lose you…”

“I would never judge y-you for that, angel…” The worry dimple was back between Wilhemina’s eyebrows. She turned her head to place a kiss on Billie Dean’s hand.

“I-it’s not just that… I just… you are so—so classy and so intelligent and absolutely captivating and I…” Billie sighed. “I’ve slept w-with women I barely k-knew because I decided a relationship was n-not for me. I went to bars, I had o-one-night stands, I had given up on love because h-how could anyone decide my ways were worth it? And n-now that you’re here I just… I feel so ashamed.”

Oh. The voices inside Venable’s head wanted to start talking again, whispering all kinds of degrading things towards herself. Wilhemina fought hard, refusing to allow them to win; they wouldn’t this time, for now she was not alone anymore, for now she had Billie Dean. She’ll stop liking you as soon as she realizes you have no experience in anything. She probably saw hundreds of bodies that are better than yours. Did Billie even do something worth the crucifying her mind always did? Wasn’t she a single, grown woman who felt comfortable enough to explore a thing society deemed as so absolutely wrong? And for what reason? Why was it wrong? It was definitely not Billie’s fault that she didn’t have experiences as such, that she felt so uncomfortable in her own skin. “You don’t have to be ashamed for h-having a life, Billie.” She sat up straight. Honey eyes looked away as Billie Dean brought her hand back towards herself, nervously playing with her fingers that previously caressed Wilhemina’s cheek. “So what you had one-night stands? So what y-you’ve slept with women you met at bars? That doesn’t make you less of a person, Billie. It doesn’t make you unworthy of love. You could have slept with a different woman a day for all I care, and that wouldn’t make a difference to how I feel towards you.” She hadn’t slept with anyone in years, and she still felt unworthy of love, too… why did it even matter, after all?

“It was—it wasn’t even one per week, probably one-night stand a month,” Billie Dean murmured.

“It’s just an example,” Venable said softly. Billie nodded. Wilhemina smiled sadly. I love her. She nibbled on her lip as she thought, pondering her words. “O-of course I don’t enjoy thinking a-about you sleeping with other people… but it’s because—it’s because I…” I want you to myself. I want to be good enough for you. “I imagine you don’t enjoy thinking about me and Emma, either.” Logic. Logic was good.

Billie Dean instantly shook her head as she grimaced slightly. The corners of Wilhemina’s lips turned up, and for a second all the weight on Billie’s shoulders disappeared. The world could end and she would not give a damn as long as she had that woman with her. Leaning closer, Billie Dean kissed Venable right on the lips, lingering there as she felt a hand caressing her cheek. “I don’t ever want to kiss anyone else,” she whispered.

“Me either.” Wilhemina kissed her again, smiling to herself as she held Billie as close as she could, as tight as she could manage.

Breaking the kiss after a moment, Billie Dean stared at brown eyes. Her heart was still beating fast, and her eyes still threatened to grow teary. After a second, she spoke again. “So… do you still wanna be with me?” She murmured.

“What have I just said, silly?”

Billie Dean’s cheeks tinted pink. “I’m just making sure…”

“You’re cute.” Venable leaned to kiss her on the nose, just like Billie did to her. “Yes, I do.” Will she when she sees just how fucked up I am when it comes to intimacy?