#ahro | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

pasteidolons · 23 days ago

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𝔥𝔴𝔞𝔯𝔞𝔫𝔤 - 𝔥𝔧𝔰 || 𝔭𝔞𝔯𝔱 𝔳𝔦

pairing: hong jisoo x female!reader genre: historical au, fluff, angst, smut (later routes), supernatural members: lee jihoon, choi seungcheol, wen junhui, kwon soonyoung, jeon wonwoo, lee seokmin, kim mingyu, boo seungkwan, lee chan, xu minghao, lee chan, choi hansol warnings: crass humor and language, blood, violence, mentions of suicide, alcohol, minor character death, 660's sexism, crossdressing, medical procedures, political upset, historical inaccuracies for the sake of plot progression word count: 9.2k

taglist: @reiofsuns2001, @hipsdofangirl, @lovrehani

𝔭𝔞𝔯𝔱 𝔳 || 𝔭𝔞𝔯𝔱 𝔳𝔦𝔦

𝔐𝔞𝔯𝔠𝔥 15𝔱𝔥, 666 – 𝔘𝔫𝔤𝔧𝔦𝔫, 𝔎𝔦𝔫𝔤𝔡𝔬𝔪 𝔬𝔣 𝔖𝔦𝔩𝔩𝔞 It’s a brisk, nearly springtime, evening when Jisoo quickly races into your room, urgency in his voice, “Listen carefully. Jinsang has emerged out of hiding.”

Minhyun, trailing behind him, adds, “They are most likely heading to Fuyu.”

“Logic would dictate that…” Jisoo nods, “It is the only locale near Pyongyang with a dense enough population to feed his massive army before Silla pushes even more into their Kingdom. Their foolish plan to thrust Silla into chaos hadn’t panned out as expected, and it seems as if Minghao’s kept his word… Surely they are reaching the point of desperation.”

The Demon’s crimson stare flickers to you, “Since this directly concerns you as a Heo, do you intend on accompanying us?” His gaze looks impertinent, almost as if he’s testing you.

Your mind is already set, “I’m going.”

He squints at you in response, staring blankly at you for a brief moment before relenting, “Very well.” His curt response is all you need.

The last you and Jisoo spoke about matters concerning Jinsang, he’d been dead set on prohibiting you form getting involved, yet now, as Silla pushes further into Goguryeo territory, you aren’t as worried at the fear of all-out war breaking out. If Furies can no longer be used as leverage, then maybe Jinsang can see the error in his ways once he realizes how little Goguryeo values his experiments. You wrestle with these thoughts as Jisoo continues.

“I assume he’s marching half of his Furies north as we speak,” He muses.

“Minghao should already be there with a group of soldiers.” Minhyun says.

“Then we will reconvene with him as soon as our business with Heo is concluded.”

Ungjin is blessed with a quiet calm as its residents sleep peacefully in the dead of night. The three of you wind carefully through the city, making your way to the northern gate to head towards Hanseong.

𝔐𝔞𝔯𝔠𝔥 30𝔱𝔥, 666 – 𝔊𝔦𝔯𝔦𝔫 ℜ𝔢𝔰𝔦𝔡𝔢𝔫𝔠𝔢, ℌ𝔞𝔫𝔰𝔢𝔬𝔫𝔤, 𝔎𝔦𝔫𝔤𝔡𝔬𝔪 𝔬𝔣 𝔖𝔦𝔩𝔩𝔞 “Have they already left?” Jisoo’s question rings through the nighttime sky, “I don’t detect anyone nearby…”

During your travels north, Hanseong was readily captured by the Silla forces moving towards the capital of Goguryeo, allowing you easy access into the city. It had been difficult to track down the whereabouts of where Heo Jinsang had been holing up the Furies, but Minhyun had gotten a lead towards this one particular residence on the outskirts of the city.

“Oh!” You say, your eye catching something moving atop the roof before hopping down to greet the three of you.

“It’s been a while,” Hak Ahro smiles, “I’ve been waiting patiently for you, sister.”

“Ahro—” you begin before he speaks over you.

“I’ve already spoken with Jinsang. He informed me that he had generously offered you the chance to join us, but…” His gaze flickers to Jisoo, “He got in the way of that, or something. Don’t you think it rude to interrupt an emotional reunion between a father and daughter?”

Jisoo says nothing, keeping his guard raised as he glares at Ahro without humoring his sarcasm.

“So?” Ahro asks, “Why are all of you here? If you’ve brought these two as your bodyguards, it can’t mean anything good.

You know that speaking with your father had proved futile, but with their hope dwindling, maybe, maybe, you can get through to them.

“Jisoo,” you whisper to him, “please give me one more chance.”

Without moving his head, he shifts his line of sight to stare at you begrudgingly, taking his time to decide, “As you wish…”

You feel a huge pang of relief, and after thanking him, you turn to face Ahro, “I want you and father to hear me out before this goes any further.”

Ahro gazes at you coldly, pursing his lips, “I see… I think I have an idea of what you’re going to say. Why don’t you all come inside? Jinsang’s been expecting you.”

The three of you follow him inside cautiously to the main room where Heo Jinsang stands. You hadn't expected him to be here, but somewhere far north with his Furies.

“At last,” he smiles, “you’ve come.”

Although you’ve made yourself aware of all the horrible things he’d done over the past few years, every time that Heo Jinsang greets you with his jovial smile, it shatters you into a thousand pieces, “… Father.”

Even if you aren’t related by blood, he’d dedicated his life to raising you like a daughter. As the guilt trickles in, you have to snap yourself out of it, straightening your back as you speak to them.

“I dreamt of something. It wasn’t much, but it was a memory from my childhood…” You begin slowly, recollecting the memory, “I witnessed a vision of our village burning, and I recalled how the humans destroyed our way of life. Both of you were there to rescue me, and together we escaped the fire by fleeing into the forest.”

“I can only imagine,” your father winces, “how painful it must have been to remember such atrocities.”

You shake your head at him, “It’s not about me. I know the two of you have been mulling this trauma over for far longer than I have. After all that’s happened, I can’t blame either of you for holding onto your grudge against humanity for as long as you have.”

“Then…” Ahro’s voice perks up at his attempt to interject, you can swear you see his expression begin to soften.

“Keeping all of this in mind, however, I implore the two of you not to unleash your Fury army.” As you mention the last part, both Ahro and Jinsang freeze in shock. “We were able to avoid the terrors of war in Ungjin… Why do either of you seek to inflict pain on others? Haven’t they suffered enough? I’m sure neither of you want to impose the same nightmarish fate that we’ve had to endure, do you?”

A forlorn expression covers Jinsang’s face, Ahro, on the other hand, is less sympathetic to the point you’re trying to make.

“Don’t break your foot getting off of that high horse.” He frowns, “Must be nice living a privileged life, isn’t it? Do you know what I had to struggle with after our village burned down? About how I was treated with the Hak clan? Because I cannot bear children, they treated me like I was less than the shit they scraped from their boots. I was lucky they kept me alive…”

Bitterness erodes his voice, “They broke me again and again and again until I was nothing. At one point I…” He pauses, shaking his head, “Thanks to them, I realized humans and Demons are no different. Power corrupts all.”

Listening to him makes your heart sink. All that time you lived peacefully in Toehwa-hyeon… Just what had Ahro been subjected to? A life with no love or compassion, it explains so much.

“Then what is it that you want, Ahro?” You ask, “Do you want the Furies to rebuild the Heo clan? Is that what you really want?”

“Isn’t it obvious?” He spits out, “It’s my duty… I cannot let our parents down by letting our name hang in disgrace! I refuse to let those imbeciles destroy our legacy without putting up a fight! The Hak clan abused me, and the Demons in the south and north turned a blind eye to our suffering, letting our people scatter with the wind. How do you expect me to forgive them for spitting on us when we begged for their help?! Doesn’t that insult what it means to be a Demon?”

Each word he speaks breaks off another piece of your heart as his festering resentment comes to light. Maybe you had judged him incorrectly and the only thing that can soothe his soul is… if he exacted revenge on every person that had ever harmed or wronged him in the past. Perhaps, there is no other way…

Jisoo steps in front of you all of a sudden, not even looking at you as he speaks, “Step back”

“Jisoo…” Just as you had feared, their time of reckoning has come. “Jisoo I—”

“I told you to step back,” he barks at you sternly, and you can’t help but move. His hand reaches for the hilt of his sword, drawing it in one swift motion. Jisoo holds it comfortably in his palm as if it’s an extension of his own arm, and like a phantom, it glows, illuminating the room.

“Hwangun’s Demonslayer, hm?” Ahro muses as his eyes track the blade. “Since that weapon was forged to kill Demons, it must mean you’re really going for us, aren’t you?”

“Of course.” Jisoo declares.

“Then,” Ahro smirks, “I suppose I’ll have to return the favor.” His hand slips into his pocket, procuring a crystalline vial.

“The dishonored bastard of a Demon clan has to forfeit his life in order to become a fake, is that it?” Jisoo’s eyes watch the red liquid swirl around the glass, “And here, I thought you could stoop no lower.”

“It appears we disagree on what constitutes honor,” Ahro’s fingers toy with the opening, “No matter what happens, I cannot allow you to kill me here!”

“Ahro, no!” Taking a split second to decide, you sprint towards him to snatch away the serum.

As you near, he shouts out, “Don’t touch me!” And he shoves you and your attempt at saving him away, causing you to fall to the floor.

You’re too late, as he’s uncapped the vial and placing it to his lips, he drinks the contents quickly. Ahro grips his chest, moaning in anguish. He lets the glass slip from his hand, it shatters on the floor as it lands. And then, just as Jinsang’s had done, his eyes begin to glow gold. His hair turns pale white and two horns emerge from his forehead.

Your brother has become a Fury.

“See?” He smirks, “Now it’s a fair fight, isn’t it, Hong Jisoo?”

“You are lost, boy.” Jisoo murmurs coolly. All of a sudden, an aura emanates from him as his own body morphs, his hair turning white, his eyes gold and the horns emerging from his own head. Both of them radiate spheres of energy, glowing white hot as they charge one another.

The thunderous clang of their blades echoes deafeningly around the room. Their agility is superhuman, making it difficult to track the paths of their swords as they rapidly trade a flurry of unrelenting attacks.

“You’re not quick enough for me!” Ahro laughs maniacally, “At this rate I will crush you in minutes!”

Sparks fly as their swords crack into one another, neither one willing to let up steam.

“Jinsang,” Minhyun calls out, “You’re mine.”

“There’s no need to rush things,” Jinsang leers, “In fact, since we’re all together, perhaps you would be better off warming up with my beloved children.” He places two fingers to his mouth and whistles.

From behind you, you hear the ominous creak of doors opening. Within seconds, your worst fears are realized. You find yourself surrounded by a bevy of red eyes, Furies calling out for blood.

Minhyun is the first to reach, unsheathing his sword, swinging fast slashes at the Furies funneling into the room. Yet… Not even Minhyun’s skill with a blade can subdue the incoming Furies, they close in without flinching.

“Bastards!” Minhyun cries out, releasing another volley of strikes. He has the advantage of battle-worn experience and superior strength but these Furies are different. His attacks do little to stunt their fervor, and soon, dozens of Furies have you cornered.

“Minhyun! Jisoo!” You cry out, reaching for the blade at your hip to join them in the fight. Suddenly, you’re grabbed from behind.

“Let’s leave while we can,” Jinsang murmurs to you, “No matter what anyone else claims, you are a descendent of the Heo clan. Your parents would have wanted you to join us more than anything.”

“No!” You struggle under his grip, “Let me go!” It’s impossible to slip from his grasp.

“Demons from the west and Demons from the east… Two species that have never been acquainted will now come together as one,” he says, “It will create the strongest Demon ever to exist. This is your destiny.”

His words paralyze you with fear, and at first nothing he says registers. Is this what he had planned for you all along?

If all goes according to his plan, then the casualties wouldn’t be limited to the Kingdoms alone. This affliction can potentially spread around the world, devastating countless lives. You can’t bear to let your life amount to this, nor can you stand to let yourself be attached to such a crime against humanity…

Your eyes flick down to your waist, and you struggle in your father’s arms to grab your blade.

“What are you doing?!” Jinsang shouts, “Don’t do anything reckless!” He attempts to pry the blade from you, but finds it difficult as you jostle yourself in his arms.

“Let her go, Jinsang,” Jisoo says as he saunters towards the two of you.

“What?” Jinsang exclaims, “How are you here so soon…? Don’t tell me Ahro lost to the likes of you.”

“Are you deaf, old man? I said, ‘Let her go’.”

Your father snickers, continuing to ignore the command. Jisoo shifts his eyes at you momentarily, looking at you intently as he motions with his lips. It’s almost as if he’s expressing his desire to kill your father, whether or not you approve.

At this point, it seems inevitable. You had spilled your heart out, and still he refused to listen. At some point, you have to accept the truth. Your paths had diverged some time ago, and it’s unlikely that you would ever see eye to eye about the atrocities he threatens to commit. Unfortunately, it leaves you with no other choice.

You look Jisoo in the eye and without another second to hesitate, nodding firmly.

Judging by his wry smile, it seems as if Jisoo’s understood everything.

“Death is a messy affair, and this is certainly no exception.” Jisoo raises his sword, “Shut your eyes.”

You appreciate his sentiment, but shake your head, “I am a Demon of the Heo Family,” you say, “The least I can do is dignify him with the honor of watching his final moments.”

“You’ve got a stronger heart than I thought. Don’t blame me if this haunts you forever,” His attention then turns to your father, “Okay, Jinsang. Have you made peace with yourself? Luckily for you, I am merciful. I promise this won’t hurt; well, not too much.”

He raises his sword high above your father’s head, stopping within inches of his face. Panic suddenly set in for Jinsang, realizing there would be no escape from his execution until— His eyes begin to glow menacingly, focusing his Fury powers within himself, causing the ground underfoot to rumble.

Jinsang breaks away from you to rush at Jisoo. But it’s no use. Their difference in power is palpable. Jisoo effortlessly swings his sword at the oncoming Jinsang, and in an instant, a deep, wide gash appears on your father’s sunken chest.

A splash of crimson blood cascades in the air as your father cries out in agony. He falls, lifeless to the floor, limp and dead. Jisoo flicks his sword downward, sending an arc of blood droplets flying, before sheathing his blade as if to make a conclusive statement.

You run to your father’s corpse when something peculiar occurs. After the color leaves his face, his flesh begins to smolder, similar to the burning logs of a fire, and slowly, he turns to ash before you. As he disintegrates, what remains of his body floats away with the breeze, leaving behind nothing in its wake.

At long last, Heo Jinsang is dead. The man for whom you had spent years searching for had, once again, exited your life without a word.

Although you had accepted the possibility of his death long ago, your body feels suddenly light, perhaps feeling his empty weight in your broken heart. You cannot understand how it has come to this.

Reflecting on those circumstances sends you into a defeated slump, and without saying a word, Jisoo draws you into his embrace, your tears staining his robes.

“Jisoo,” you murmur, unable to look up at him. Whatever he has to say on the matter is an enigma to you, but for now you take solace in the comfort of his arms. You don’t think you can stand even if you want to.

“What happened to Ahro? Did you…?” What do you want to say? ‘Kill him’? The words are unable to form.

“I injured him, but he escaped.” Jisoo says quietly, “However since it was a wound inflicted by my blade, it will take some time to heal.” The tone of his voice gives you the impression that he’s trying to put you at ease, but you doubt Ahro would completely heal from an injury Jisoo would’ve given him. Yet the fact that he’s attempting to show you kindness makes all the difference in this moment.

“Father was a wonderful man… He was…” Your heart feels so heavy that you barely notice the tears streaming from your eyes. “He cared so much for his patients I just—I don’t understand… I was proud to call him my father.” The bittersweet memory of your childhood comes flooding back to you, which seems to only exacerbate your tears.

“I wonder what caused him to change so drastically?”

“If your village hadn’t been burned to the ground, then perhaps there would have been some hope of saving the man he used to be,” Jisoo says slowly, “At the end of the day, humans are to blame.”

There’s a resentful undertone lurking in his hushed voice. Jisoo is unashamedly proud to be a Demon. Eventually, this pride morphed into hatred, a potent discontent for everyone he considers beneath him. You can only imagine how difficult it must have been to murder one of his own kin.

“I understand…” Although humans had been responsible for the death of your people, which led to them following this path of bitter revenge… Your family chose to let it consume them to the point of no return. However, it’s easier to conceptualize than it is to accept.

“I’m just so heartbroken,” you sob so hard that your eyes begin to burn. Jisoo, sensing your pain, holds you just a bit tighter. “I know what you mean, though… Some humans are unmistakably evil, but others are okay…” Tears drip into your mouth as you speak, their saltiness stinging. “There are so many people who commit their lives to pursuits other than power.”

In your experience, the Hwarang had been a prime example of this, you want nothing more than to learn of their fate. You need to find them, wherever they are. Now that you’ve lost your father, there aren’t many other convictions worth seeing to their end.

After a few more moments, you pull away from Jisoo and he turns to Minhyun, “I believe the fighting will soon stop in Fuyu.”

“Even though they’re fighting Furies, I doubt Minghao will have much trouble. Perhaps we should come to his aid,” Minhyun suggests.

“Indeed,” Jisoo nods before turning to face you. “Return to the inn.”

“What?” You shake your head, “I can’t just let you two handle this alone…”

“Don’t flatter yourself. What good do you expect to do? You look dreadful,” he says, furrowing his brow. “Hurry up and return to the inn. Get some rest… Got it?”

You’re concerned about the outcome of Fuyu, but you trust Jisoo to take care of things, and you’re comforted by the fact that he’s looking out for you.

𝔄𝔭𝔯𝔦𝔩 8𝔱𝔥, 666 – ℌ𝔞𝔫𝔰𝔢𝔬𝔫𝔤, 𝔎𝔦𝔫𝔤𝔡𝔬𝔪 𝔬𝔣 𝔖𝔦𝔩𝔩𝔞 After days of waiting, Jisoo finally returns, slinking into the inn with a reserved expression.

“Minghao performed his duty and destroyed all of the Heo’s monsters,” Jisoo reports, “If you sincerely wish to reunite with the Hwarang, then prepare your things at once.” He speaks curtly, leaving you with that as he exits your room.

You quickly rummage to gather your things, your thoughts lingering on your father as you find one of his old books tucked away in your bag. Although, your attention is turned to the door once again as Jisoo steps inside, sporting a whole new wardrobe.

It takes you a moment to recognize him as he’s wearing Tang styled clothing. It clings to the dimensions of his body so nicely that you can’t help but feel your face warm at how… nice he looks. You look away to keep from staring at him.

“What’s with your face?” He asks, “Do you want a uniform like this?”

“O-oh, no, that’s not it.” You shake your head, shoving things into your bag. “They just look a little uncomfortable.”

“Not at all,” he muses, flexing out his arms, “To tell you the truth, they’re a bit easier to maneuver in than my typical clothes. Perhaps I will have a set made for you one day, look forward to it.”

“I couldn’t—” you say quickly.

“I’m trying to show you kindness, it’s a gift.” He sighs out, “Quit wallowing in your self-pity for once. Now, there are people waiting for us. Let’s go.”

“People…?” You ask, following him outside. “Oh, hello Minghao… Are you the person waiting for us?”

Although you had clearly addressed him, he ignores you, making you think that you’re imagining his visage. After a moment, he stares at you intently.

“Did something happen?” You ask with a tilt of your head.

Yet again, he doesn’t respond, choosing instead to chew on his lips as he picks out his word carefully, “Do you remember the Hwarang captain Mingyu?”

“Of course,” you nod, “He was one of the kindest people I met when I lived with the Hwarang.” Why is Minghao mentioning Mingyu now? As you consider the possibilities, it hits you. It feels as if one of Minghao’s arrows has hit your chest, and you’re finding it difficult to breathe.

No… It can’t be.

“Mingyu passed away. He lost his life battling the Furies in Fuyu…”

“What?!” You cry out. Even though you had braced yourself for the possibility, nothing can soften the blow of the truth. “Wh- Why would he…?”

Because Namekawa had mentioned something about how Mingyu wasn’t traveling with the Hwarang anymore, you had assumed he would’ve gone elsewhere other than the front lines.

“While investigating the movement of Jinsang’s Furies, he and I crossed paths,” Minghao explains, “After briefing him of our situation, he and I struck up something of an alliance… All of a sudden, he began repeating how much he’d wanted to battle beside me. Maybe it’s me. Maybe I’m just bad luck, since everyone I fight alongside ends up dead soon after.”

Although you’re watching his lips move, your mind instinctively mutes everything else that falls from his mouth. You try your best to focus on your image of Mingyu. There’s nothing of worth you can contribute so you simply stand there, demoralized and numb.

Mingyu… Although he seemed rough around the edges to others, you remember him more as a gentle, courageous soul. How could someone so beautiful die so young…?

“No time for tears,” Jisoo says, “You still want to find them, don’t you?”

You nod silently, hoping that Mingyu’s death is the epilogue to your harrowing journey… Although you’re unsure if that’s the case now.

𝔐𝔞𝔶 19𝔱𝔥, 666 – 𝔉𝔲𝔶𝔲, 𝔎𝔦𝔫𝔤𝔡𝔬𝔪 𝔬𝔣 𝔊𝔬𝔤𝔲𝔯𝔶𝔢𝔬 By the time you reach Fuyu, spring is in full bloom. You find the town has already succumbed to Silla as their forces begin to encircle Pyongyang. The town itself is still in disarray from the battle, its ravaged exterior telling you everything you need to know.

“I have bad news,” Jisoo murmurs to you as you walk along the streets of the town, not noticing that he had joined you some time along your stroll.

“Jisoo…” Your heart still reeling from Minghao’s revelation of Mingyu, you’re unsure of how much more you can take. “Please, go on.”

As soon as you answer, he tilts his head down and speaks quietly, “In retaliation for their capture of Fuyu, Youngmin was tried and beheaded by the Goguryeo forces.”

A paragon of benevolence and leadership… Youngmin had been denied an honorable death and it breaks your heart to hear that he’d been decapitated like some criminal. For a moment you remain silent, softly turning your thoughts over in your head as Jisoo looks away.

“You can decide whether or not you believe it.”

“No,” you shake your head, “I believe you.”

When Namekawa had notified you of Youngmin’s surrender, you considered this to be the worst-case scenario. You buried the thought somewhere, clinging to the hope that he could be rescued, or maybe they would show him mercy for his character. But hearing Jisoo say it, having it become real through his curt, impersonal words, is a devastating blow at a time when you’re reaching your limit.

“What does that mean for the Hwarang now?” You question.

Youngmin had proudly served as the Hwarang’s Chief, and without him, you wonder how they would adapt to his absence.

“I hear they’ve begun to march onto Geumji to continue fighting in their late Chief’s honor.” He says simply, “Where does that leave you?” His question seems less interrogative and more interested in your feelings, which you appreciate.

However, you figure he’s intuitive enough to know that your opinion on the matter is unchanged, and you answer him resolutely, “I’m going to Geumji too. I’m going to wherever the Hwarang men are.”

𝔖𝔢𝔭𝔱𝔢𝔪𝔟𝔢𝔯 5𝔱𝔥, 666 – 𝔗𝔥𝔢 ℜ𝔬𝔞𝔡 𝔱𝔬 𝔊𝔢𝔲𝔪𝔧𝔦, 𝔎𝔦𝔫𝔤𝔡𝔬𝔪 𝔬𝔣 𝔊𝔬𝔤𝔲𝔯𝔶𝔢𝔬 After a long and encompassing journey, Jisoo and you set foot in a small town some days away from Pyongyang, gazing at the peripheral view of its vast landscape. Tension boils in the air around the upcoming battles, particularly in the small villages in the area, just like the one you’re in now.

It’s here that Hwan Minhyun meets you, giving you valuable information.

“The Hwarang were fighting in Naemihol until mid-June,” He relays, “They held the area until Silla forces could successfully take over entire control… But they lost many men in the conflict.”

“Just as I thought…” Jisoo murmurs, “Cannon fodder.”

After being dealt another crushing wave of casualties, Minhyun mentions something that piques your interest. “They’re heading to Namhansanseong. To my knowledge, their plan is to fortify the fortress and hold it for as long as they can until Silla once again comes to their aid.”

“Namhansanseong… Then that’s where we need to go, isn’t it?” You say quickly.

“One would assume…” Jisoo nods, “Is that what you want?”

Chasing the Hwarang is trying to catch smoke with your hands, they’re just out of reach every time. Would your reunion ever happen? Or would each of them succumb to a fate similar to Youngmin’s or Mingyu’s before this war ever ends?

Fear and anxiety prompts you to speak, “I want to go.”

“I’m unamused by your poor attempt at humor,” Jisoo frowns, “If you’re being serious, then I’m even less amused.” Sensing your resolve, he speaks bitterly, “Are you stupid or have you been living under a rock while they run themselves into the ground? Namhansanseong will be attacked relentlessly before Silla even sets foot into the area, are you sure that your Hwarang will be there when we arrive?”

“I understand,” you mirror his frown, “but that’s the only lead we have about their whereabouts. I’ve missed them a handful of times now and I don’t know if I could stomach never seeing them again.” You stop yourself, biting your tongue from contemplating the worst.

Jisoo’s expression, however, is as aloof as it’s always been, “Let’s suppose they are, in fact, at Namhansanseong. What the hell do you expect you’re going to do if you make it there? Waltz on in?”

“Well—” You start before Jisoo stops you.

“You would be killed. You’re an idiot if you think otherwise.”

“I am not going to do anything once I get there!” You don’t need his sharp criticism; not do you expect to come and rescue the Hwarang. You just need him to understand how you feel. “I just… I want to see everyone while I still can.” trying to steady your breath, you continue, “I don’t know if I could bear the thought of never seeing them again before something happens to them like Youngmin or Mingyu…”

“What?” He says bluntly, “You’re willing to get yourself killed for the mere possibility of seeing them?”

“I’m not going to let them kill me…”

“Mind telling me what you know that I don’t?” Voice piquing, “In case you were unaware, Kwak Youngmin has been executed, and his head is currently on display at Dosal Castle. Then there’s Kim Mingyu, who was ripped to shreds in Fuyu. No one’s patting him on the back for dying like a wounded animal. I’ve told you all this before—they will be a footnote in history.”

He makes sense, if the fortress is going to come under siege it would be foolish for you to go. The Hwarang would die and be written off as some common foot soldiers, warping the truth and their meaning for a while…

“I’ll remember them,” you state, “It doesn’t matter if people mischaracterize the Hwarang from who they really were…. I will honor their memory, and you can make damn sure that I’ll never forget it.”

You can almost hear Jisoo gnashing his teeth as he glares at you, “I knew women were whimsied by delusion, but you are sitting at the top of the pile. Very well. Do what makes you happy.”

An awkward tension lingers in the space of your conversation, making you unsure if Jisoo’s upset or just frustrated at your unwillingness to cooperate. His eyes are like daggers, sinking into you.

“Let’s simmer down, you two,” Minhyun steps in, looking at the other man, “What’s the point in arguing? And you, Jisoo, you normally keep your cool around women.”

He scoffs, “Maybe I’d keep my ‘cool’ if she wasn’t being such an idiot. This discussion is pointless. I have other things that require my attention, so I'm taking my leave.” Jisoo’s biting tone leaves you feeling uncomfortable as he spins on his heels and walks away.

You contemplate calling his name to clear the air but Minhyun stops you.

“You should go after him.” Noting your confused expression, he continues, “Jisoo is a real grouch, but he’s not the type of man that would let something frustrate him enough to walk off like that… I understand that you’re racing against the clock to see your friends right now, but it’s not like you’re in any position to get to Namhansanseong by yourself. You know that, right?”

“Yes…”

“Besides, it’s like you said. We have no idea or guarantee that the Hwarang will be there. I’ll do what I can to investigate their whereabouts for the time being… For now, why don’t you speak to Jisoo?”

“Thank you, Minhyun,” you say quickly, beginning to walk after Jisoo.

“No need,” he shakes his head with a small smile, “I’m simply doing my duty.”

By the time you find Jisoo, the sun is beginning to set into a warm pool on the horizon.

“Jisoo…” You timidly call out to him.

He turns his head to gaze at you, but pays you no mind after and continues to walk at the same pace.

“Where… Where are you going?”

“If you insist on joining me, then shut your mouth and keep up. You’ll understand when we arrive.”

You sprint up to try and further the conversation, but he seems unwilling to entertain such things. You peek at him confusedly, and you’re struck with the most peculiar feeling of déjà vu.

“Huh?” Time seems to shift for a moment, things moving slowly as you look to a row of trees looming over the forested path. Its neat arrangement reminds you of a welcoming ceremony. Nose tingling with the most familiar scents; a fragrant patch of flowers dotting a lush meadow, dew clinging onto their petals…

Your body is trying to tell you something, consuming you with a vague sense of yearning. It all feels so surreal, and you can’t place your finger on it. An ambient energy imbues you, a serene grace that puts your tired heart at ease.

“Here we are…” Before you have an opportunity to voice how strange you feel, Jisoo stops walking.

“This place…” you can hardly form the words as you realize. Your eyes scanning the environment, hitting you with a blast of nostalgia that nearly topples you. Beside you lay a charred hut with fallen supports, your mind immediately pictures what it once had been. This had been a village, and in the middle of it lays a decayed well, encircled by overgrown weeds.

Remnants of old life remain scattered here, an old bucket lay broken, an old doll lay weathered in the grass near your feet. There’s no mistaking where you are.

“Is this the village where I was born?” You look to Jisoo, who neglects to answer you and shuts his eyes softly.

“Hm…” Something catches his attention, his eyes shooting open and he darts up a small hill to see what it is. To your surprise, you see Hak Ahro.

He’s collapsed in a bed of flowers, your heart dropping as you near. On the side of his ribcage is gauze that had been completely soaked in blood. You’re under the impression that he’d attempted to treat his injury inflicted by Jisoo yet… It doesn’t surprise you that he would flee here in anticipation of death’s embrace, left to suffer his last, bitter moments alone.

“He’s been long dead…” Jisoo ascertains by the stiffness of the body.

You take comfort in that, in the fact that his expression seems rather peaceful. Part of you believes that, after the evening passes, he’ll wake up to greet the morning and you could talk about everything that happened.

A new memory begins to uncloud itself as you look on to your deceased brother’s body… It had been years ago, back when this village was populated and full of life. You’d asked Ahro to take you to see flowers… To see these flowers, even though your parents hadn’t allowed it. He’d offered to take you in secret, claiming that he’d protect you from anything outside.

“I just remembered something important,” you say, feeling a hot, sticky tear begin to roll down your cheek.

“Important?” Jisoo questions.

You nod softly, “I was… loved. There were many people who protected and cared for me; most of all, it was Jinsang and Ahro...”

“I see…” Jisoo doesn’t press the matter further. The two of you listen to the gentle hum of the wind passing through the bones of the village, grazing against the burned wood and worn stone. “Your brother deserves to be buried, a grave befitting the head of the Heo Family.”

Together, you hike to the peak of the hill that overlooks the village, and it is there that you bury Ahro’s remains. Jisoo keeps his eyes fixated on the grave for a few minutes after you have finished patting the dirt down. He sighs and reaches for the canteen on the side of his belt, pouring the contents gently atop the grave.

The gokaju reflects in the moonlight as it falls from the bottle, seeping deep into the soil. Jisoo is expressionless, watching the alcohol drip out as the container empties. His eyes glow with melancholy, and you wonder if he’s regretful about how things had transpired between the two of them.

“If it weren’t for the humans, then I am certain that your brother would have made a fine leader.” His sentiment is heavy, seeming as if the two of you are learning to navigate the nuances of your grief together.

‘If it weren’t for the humans…’ It’s a lofty idea, one that you will likely ponder for the remainder of your life. Things could have manifested so differently for Ahro and your father… At the very least, they could have made an impact on their people, unburdened by the curse of vengeance that unfairly plagued the rest of their short lives.

Ahro originally mentioned something about wanting to use the Furies to build back the Heo Clan, but in the end, you believe it all to have been a mask to hide the trauma inflicted by the wicked humans. In essence, he had wanted to preserve the picture of this village and everything it stood for.

Maybe—just maybe—he’d wanted to reclaim some of those memories that were viciously stripped from him. He was a boy whose every step was met with misfortune, tragically so. He died as he lived—alone. It’s the only way you’re able to think of him without slumping into a dark depression.

You wish and hope that his last moments were painless, that he’d been able to reconcile his hatred as he laid in the meadow of the one place he cared for.

“Jisoo…” you call out his name once more as you leave the hill slowly.

“What?”

“I know that my father and Ahro committed unforgivable crimes against humanity and our people… Do you think it would be okay for me to remember them as gentle, kind people…?” Jinsang’s serum had been catastrophic, responsible for countless deaths. For them to violate the natural order of Demonhood, and all that encompasses your sacred existence, is a mark of condemnation to Jisoo and his kin.

“You are free to do as you please,” he says quietly. “The Demon’s Code has no bearing on matters of the heart. Regardless of the sins they have committed, they are still your family.”

His words bring a weight from your shoulders, “Can I ask you one more question? Demons far surpass humans in strength and ability, right? How can you explain what happened to my people? How were humans able to do,” you look to the barren village, “this?”

Jisoo tilts his head, staring into your eyes inquisitively. Perhaps he’s testing you to see if you can handle the truth; to be honest, you’re unsure if you are, but the question needs an answer.

“Goguryeo asked for aid in stopping the preliminary attacks on Baekje over twenty years ago, they needed more help than my or Minhyun’s families could afford to give them, so they went east… It was then they asked the Heo clan.” Jisoo pauses for a moment, “Your people, however, were unenthused about the idea of participating in human affairs, particularly in regards to warfare, and supposedly declined to help…”

Because they expressed no interest, you’re sure that the King of Goguryeo saw that as an affront to his authority…

“That’s why my people were killed? That was their justification?” You cry out in defeat and Jisoo turns to look at the remnants of the village. It’s futile. The past cannot be changed.

“Do you now feel their hatred?” He asks simply before uttering his words of advice, “Remain in the shadows, out of their affairs. This is where Demons belong. Of all the clans, yours is the one who put the dignity of its people first by refusing. The humans had no right to attack your people and were blinded by their lust for power and control.”

You direct your gaze to the forest floor as he speaks once more, his voice barely above a whisper, “It was never my intention to reveal the history of the Heo Clan to you, but… I suppose, because we are here, it is unavoidable.”

As you look at him, he asks, “Do you not resent the humans for what they’ve done?”

You mull for a moment, “There’s a part of me that thinks about how I should hate them… But there’s something overriding that angry voice and instead I just feel… heartbroken. I’m just filled with sorrow for what could have been.”

“Sorrow?” He asks and you nod.

When you first learned of what compelled your father and Ahro to embark on this path of revenge, all you felt was sorrow. Grief has taken you entirely now. You’d been reminded of the family you used to know as well as the parents you will never know.

“My real father and mother… And everyone else… Do you know how they died?”

Jisoo shakes his head, “I haven’t the faintest idea. My only knowledge is that none of them put up a fight, and were complicit in the humans’ rampage. It was an admirable effort, holding onto their convictions as Demons by refusing to fight the humans, even at the cost of their own lives.”

As you and Jisoo walk through the village, you kneel down to rest your hand to lay upon one of the fallen pillars that had greeted you upon your arrival. Had you touched this pillar as a child? Now it lies as a lifeless and forgotten artifact.

“Is there no way for us to live in a world where everyone can coexist peacefully?”

Why is the pursuit of peace so entrenched in the deaths of innocent lives?

“The Hwarang exposed me to so many different walks of life… A range of motivations, ideologies and ambitions.” When two opposing parties are unwilling to compromise, then it usually leads to war, yet… “All anyone should be concerned about is helping out their fellow man. It just breaks my heart to see that people are so willing to inflict pain on others.”

“I can see how hurt you are…” Jisoo takes this moment to console you, not refute, and nods quietly. There’s a kind twinkle in his eyes, which you notice to be uncharacteristically placid as you look at him. “Perhaps there will be a day when we will no longer need our swords to speak for us.”

Eventually, you fall quiet, naturally running out of things to say. After a moment, he mutters to himself, “Humans are hopeless. They are, without exception, drawn to conflict like a moth to a lantern. This is why Demons have forsaken them, my desire to aid in their war wanes with each day. And of course, so should yours.”

“Jisoo…” You had no intention of being near this war, but there’s so much you need to do; namely, learn the fate of the Hwarang. Understandably, they are still deeply entrenched in the war and whatever outcome that awaits them.

“Don’t think that I’m unaware of your concern for the Hwarang men’s safety,” he says abruptly. “If you want to see them so badly, then it is pertinent for you to exercise patience. If you become restless and enter conflict too hastily, then you’ll die before you get a chance to reunite with them. Impatience is unbecoming and I believe your ancestors wouldn’t wish that upon you.”

“You’re right…” You murmur, coming to realize what he’s been saying. Jisoo is often blunt, if not outright rude. But he’s speaking honestly, and you can tell he’s genuinely worried for your well-being. That, you know for sure. “Thank you for looking out for me.”

“Well, with your penchant for recklessness, it is a necessity.” He hums.

“Recklessness?!”

“How else could I describe it?” A grin grows on his lips. “You have no means of reaching Namhansanseong by yourself.” Although he’s chiding you once again, you find his delivery endearing, his words snaking their way into your heart.

“Minhyun said the same thing that you did, Jisoo.” You say slowly, “he said that we have no way of knowing whether or not the Hwarang men will still be there by the time we arrive, so I should wait. I suppose we will have to until we know for sure…”

His eyes scan you, thinning with satisfaction, “Glad to see you’ve wisened up by taking my advice to heart. Obedience is a good look on you, you’re well on your way to becoming a good wife.”

“Way to miss the point!” You huff, cheeks warming as you speak again, “Besides, I’m not your wife.”

After scoffing at his suggestion, you tun to get one last glimpse of the scenery around you. All you want is to reunite with the Hwarang, but now you can’t bear the thought of letting the deaths of your paternal parents, Jinsang, and Ahro be in vain by wasting your life so wantonly. You have to make absolutely sure to pick and choose your battles.

As you leave the village, you put the image of the charred ruins behind you, instead carrying the resolve to honor your people and their sacrifice.

𝔇𝔢𝔠𝔢𝔪𝔟𝔢𝔯 15𝔱𝔥, 666 – 𝔊𝔢𝔲𝔪𝔧𝔦, 𝔎𝔦𝔫𝔤𝔡𝔬𝔪 𝔬𝔣 𝔊𝔬𝔤𝔲𝔯𝔶𝔢𝔬 After staying in the village on the route to Namhansanseong for a while, it’s found out that the Hwarang have made it to their destination in record time. Yet, the battle had been short lived, Goguryeo surrendered swiftly, wanting to save their men for the final affront from Silla on their own doorstep. You’re now unsure of the Hwarang’s whereabouts, only waiting anxiously as you and Jisoo spot Minhyun walking down the well-worn path towards you.

“I have discovered their location,” he says quietly. He takes a deep breath and speaks somberly, “Allegedly, Boo Seungkwan, has passed away from illness in Sabi. As for Choi Hansol, he was last seen leading a battalion of men at Wangnam Pass, and has been missing in action. We can only assume the worst…”

Your stomach sinks like a stone into the ocean. Suddenly, your breaths are shallow and staggered, they are… gone. Two of the most talented warriors in the Hwarang are now nothing more than just a faint memory, fading against the tide of time.

“Wen Junhui, who had been reported to have left the Hwarang, is also missing in action.” You bite your lip. Is he safe? Are any of them safe? “Choi Seungcheol and Kwon Soonyoung, both of whom led the Fury Corps under the Hwarang, were killed in combat in Cholsan fighting Goguryeo soldiers.”

“Seungcheol and Soonyoung too?!” You cry out.

“The Goguryeo army was likely briefed of their use of the Furies and their weaknesses by Jinsang…” Jisoo sighs.

Their deaths are difficult to take in as you swirl already in a pit of despair. They’d willingly gave up their humanity to become Furies, and not even that could save them.

“What about the others?” You ask, looking at Minhyun.

“Thankfully for you, Lee Jihoon lives and is en route to Pyongyang with his remaining men. They’re actually leaving from the port here later today…”

“Today?!” Your eyes shoot open, looking towards the hill that leads down to the docks brimming along the town’s waterfront.

“Did I hear correctly?” Jisoo questions, “Even with his men gone? That little dog still has some bite, huh?” He’d always been first in line to scorn the Hwarang’s actions, but this is different. His tone leads you to believe the he’s impressed by Jihoon, which is a little strange.

“So, everyone’s still putting up a fight?” Life for the Hwarang following the Battle of Seorabeol is nothing but one continuous adjustment to loss and victory. Yet, they continue to push forward with their heads high.

“What reasons have they scraped together to justify continuing on?” Jisoo murmurs, “As I recall, the Crown has never taken favorably to them. I cannot fathom any reason to risk their lives so needlessly. Yet, here they are…”

“I’m unsure too,” you nod. Yet, you do know one thing. You celebrate internally, knowing their spirits are unbroken in the light of loss.

“Speaking as an outsider,” Jisoo adds, “All they’re doing is hopping from one burial ground to the next. Can you honestly tell me that this is the future they envisioned for themselves?”

“Yes…” Their steadfast dedication on the battlefield is a monument to the courage and principles of their fallen comrades.

“Do you plan on following them to Pyongyang as well?” Minhyun questions.

“Yes,” you nod, “The Commander may be unaware of the news that some of the captains have passed away…”

With Seungkwan having died in Sabi and Mingyu in Fuyu, it’s unclear to you if word of their passing has reached him. It’s your duty to honor their memory by telling Jihoon yourself.

Your eyes shift to Jisoo, “I want to travel to Pyongyang and meet up with whoever’s left.” Before you continue, you take a moment to calculate what you wish to say, “Would it be too much to ask if you’d join me?”

“Me?” His eyes widen in surprise, “Go along with you?”

“Yes,” you nod somberly, “Even if it will be a victory for Silla, I have a gut feeling that this is the end for the Hwarang.” No battlefields had been left untouched by the vicious torrents of the war, and Pyongyang stands as the decisive scene in your Kingdom’s most tumultuous chapter. “I, um, I guess that’s even more of a reason why I… I want to travel together, Jisoo. I want you with me when I witness the end of the Hwarang.”

It’s surreal, if not strangely appropriate, of you to ask such a thing of him. Yet, because Jisoo’s been involved in so many duels with them over the years, you want him to bear witness to what could possibly be the Hwarang’s final, intimate moments.

He listens intently, and when you finish speaking, his lips curl into a smug grin, “The ‘end’ for them, you say…? What an enticing offer.”

“Thank you,” you’re flushed with relief at his acceptance. It’s felt like ages since anyone has been able to coax a sincere smile from you.

“I suppose that means we’ll be off…” Jisoo says, waving a short goodbye to Minhyun. “It will be faster to sail there than to walk…”

“Thank you, Minhyun, I hope to see you again soon,” you say, beginning to turn around before he stops you.

“Hold on, there’s someone here who wants to speak with you.”

Turning back around, you’re met with both the visages of Hwan Minhyun and Xu Minghao.

“It looks like you’ve made it in one piece,” Minghao notes with a smile.

“Minghao!” You call out, “What are you doing here?”

“I just came to bring you something,” he says, reaching for a sword on his waist. You have trouble looking at it properly until he holds the sheathed metal out to you, and you can finally read the inscription on the sheath.

“Is that… Mingyu’s?” You ask, reaching out for the leather holster.

“It is,” he nods slowly, “I was unable to reach the Hwarang in time. If he had lived, I believe he’d still be here fighting by everyone’s side. He was tenacious.”

Grabbing hold of the memento, you securely strap the sheathe onto you, letting it rest next to your own blade. The added weight feels as if you’re carrying along his legacy with you.

“You’re an ally of Goguryeo, are you not?” Jisoo asks Minghao.

“Like hell I am,” he scoffs, “I only answer to Baekje. Human history is only written by the victors, and everyone else is cast into the dirt. So, far be it from me to let their history speak for me.”

“Smells like bullshit to me,” Jisoo hums.

Minghao grimaces playfully at the other, then turns to face you, “You still plan on following after those Hwarang of yours, right?”

“I hope to,” you nod.

“Tell them that Kim was one of the bravest, most ferocious warriors I’ve ever met,” Minghao says with a smile.

“Minghao…” Praising humans isn’t exactly one of his habits, especially to the degree he’s described Mingyu. Imagining what he must have witnessed with Mingyu moves you almost as much as it must have moved him, a bittersweet warmth swells in your chest.

“Understood, I’ll pass on the word.”

Jisoo sighs, “Don’t bother. Isn’t this just another worm you’ve let crawl into your insipid heart?”

“Well, look who’s talking. Who was it exactly that you came all the way here for?” Minghao pokes, “I bet you’re just as curious in seeing what’s going to happen to the Hwarang.”

“Hardly. I am but a passenger of circumstance, which has taken me on the same path as them.” He shakes his head, “Enough wasting time, we have a ship to catch.”

“Okay,” you nod and turn to the other Demons. “Minghao, Minhyun, please take care of yourselves.”

As you bid the two of them farewell, Jisoo and you see yourselves out to port. Once arriving, you find the harbor to be eerily quiet.

“Have they already left?” You wonder aloud, not seeing many people bustling around.

“It appears as though the boat has already left the harbor…” Jisoo looks to the western ocean, “I believe we just missed them. They couldn’t have gotten far, so we may be able to see their boat. Do you want to try?”

“Of course. Let’s go.”

Jisoo and you ascend a nearby beach bluff where you hope to get a clearer view. A cascade of maroon ripples across the vast sea in a reflection of the wide sunset, and in the distance, you watch the shadow of a boat on the horizon.

“Do you think that’s them?” You ask Jisoo as you squint from the light on the water.

“I believe so.”

You had traveled two Kingdoms searching for them. Now, once again, you have just barely missed them, left in the dust. A sharp pang shoots up through your nose and suddenly you find yourself fighting back a wave of tears. Your teeth dig into your lower lip, hoping to not let this deluge of self-pity come to the surface.

“If you want to cry so badly, why don’t you?” Jisoo asks.

“No…” You shake your head, the tears still welling up in your eyes. “Only because I can imagine how much pain they’re in right now… I have no right to shed tears when it’s not me who’s fighting out there.”

Jisoo sighs out of frustration and closes his eyes, pausing as he shifts back and forth, “You know, just because you’re not good with a sword doesn’t mean you’re not fighting. Although your methods are quite different from the Hwarang’s, you’ve had your own demons to fight. Even I’ve noticed it.”

It feels warm to hear his gentle words acknowledging how much you’ve been through.

After seeing your father’s death, your lukewarm reunion with Ahro and visiting the village of your birth. Then your revelation of what had occurred to your friends. A tempest of grief gathered its winds in your heart, continuing to swirl with fervor as you try now not to collapse.

You can’t cry… If you do, then you’ll blur your sight of the ship that houses the remainder of your friends in the Hwarang.

“I’ll turn around if you’d like. Cry as much as you wish.” Jisoo points his nose towards the ocean, which glows with hues of orange and gold under the glimmer of the late afternoon.

In this moment, the levee holding back your tears bursts. Your forehead presses against Jisoo’s back, hands grabbing hold as well. Wailing as quietly as you can, you lament them once again slipping through your fingers. The ship begins to vanish beyond the horizon, sailing into the ocean’s furthest tendrils. Soon, it disappears from sight. You listen to the roar of the ocean for a moment before Jisoo speaks,

“I promise you… I will take you to them.” His voice low, yet urging, “Just be patient… okay?”

Jisoo, who previously seemed hell bent on abducting you at any cost from the Hwarang…. Now the shoe is on the other foot, and he’s promised to keep you safe on this last journey. Although, you’re unsure of when it’ll actually happen.

#svthub #seventeen joshua #seventeen fanfiction #seventeen fanfic #seventeen imagines #seventeen x reader #hong jisoo x reader #hong jisoo fluff #hong jisoo smut #jisoo smut #joshua x you #joshua fluff #joshua x reader #joshua angst

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literary-illuminati · 3 months ago

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2024 Book Review #55 – The Vanished Birds by Simon Jimenez

Introduction

The Spear Cuts Through Water was one of my favorite reads of last year, and I’ve been meaning to get around to Jimenez’ other work basically since I finished it. Months and months later, my TBR pile and the library’s hold queue cooperated and I finally got around to it. Of the two, you can definitely tell Birds is the debut novel, but despite the roughness I can’t help feeling like it's also the one I prefer. I do have complaints (of which, more below), and the story certainly has issues with structure and allocation of wordcount, but this really is the rare book where I feel no compunctions whatsoever giving five stars.

Knowing myself, this isn’t entirely unrelated to how fucking heartbreaking it is at points.

Synopsis

To brutally over-summarize, the book follows Nia, a starship captain hauling crops on a freight route from a ‘resource world’ to Pelican Station, one of the great centers of human civilization and Allied Space. Due to the peculiarities of faster than light travel, the round trip that is for her and her crew experienced as a span of months is for the people at both endpoints an absence of fifteen years – a convenient way for her to keep making the same mistakes as far as personal connections and relationships go. On the last loop of the route before her contract is completed, she finds herself taking care of a mute, deeply traumatized young boy discovered miraculously unharmed by the locals in what seemed like a fiery wreck. The boy – at first nonverbal, inexplicably a musical savant, deeply traumatized and mysterious in a hundred different ways – finds his way into her heart to the point that even after they return to Pelican and he’s been turned over to the security services, she can’t stop trying to find out what happened to him and making sure he’s alright.

It’s at this point that the two of them come to the attention of Fumiko Nakajima, the Millennium Woman – designer of the five great stations at the heart of Allied Space, and (thanks to the magic of cryo-sleep and FTL time differentials) one of the last survivors of long-dead Earth. She sees in the boy the possibility of something miraculous – truly instant interstellar travel – and so hires Nia and a few reliable agents to take him into Fringe Space, safely out of view of any of her ‘friends and colleagues’ who might take a similar interest in him. For fifteen years. The story then reveals itself to be one of, basically, child-rearing and coming of age – at least until the moment where the child’s miraculous abilities really do reveal themselves, and all at once things get much, much deadlier.

Structure

The book is – not quite incoherent (the thesis is very clear), but certainly unfocused. At first I thought that was rather the point – the first three chapters are each incredibly effective, melancholic short stories in their own rights'; each leapfrogging into the perspective of a character whose actions or legacy shaped the previous, but with dramatically different casts, setting and plots. These are almost certainly the most aesthetically successful and artistically disciplined sections of the book, and as I read them I assumed it would continue in the same vein for the entire book.

It does not – the book settles very firmly into being the story of Nia and the boy who is later named Ahro. The middle of the book is an almost light-hearted coming of age story, spread across the years Ahro spends growing up in the Galactic fringe with his ragtag accidental family. The final act then dramatically shifts tone again, becoming largely about recovering from betrayal and the destruction of your life, and of striving in defiance of all sense and reason to reconnect with someone you love.

There are, then, three very different vibes here, and I can’t say the shifts between them are handled with the most grace in the world. The book absolutely never stops experimenting with style either, shifting voice, perspective, level of detail, and even format (several chapters are relayed as diary entries) basically whenever the mood strikes it. It absolutely feels like an incredibly talented author showing off a bit beyond their limits – you can see the seams, the allocation of effort between the parts is...questionable, and there are a couple vital characters/subplots who just needed another chapter or two of focus – but it’s the sort of messiness that leaves me incredibly endeared.

Love, and its Discontents

Those first three chapters are essentially short stories connected by setting and a character or two – but most of all they’re connected by theme. Each is, one way or another, the story of the protagonist falling in love – the sort of love that defines a life, that cuts you to the core whenever you remember it – and then having that love fail, leaving the lover damaged or lessened in a way that never quite heals.

Things do not stay quite so melancholic, but for a story whose whole climax is centered around the quite literally metaphysical and reality-shaking power of pure love this book has a bracingly tragic sensibility of it. Love is hopelessly one-sided, or turns rancid with resentment for just long enough to make sure it can never be restored again. Romances end in betrayal and murder, bonds both sororial and paternal in half-thoughtless abandonment, soul-deep friendships in vicious arguments and a severing of ties. Love, the book says, is deeply contingent and often more transitory than it seems – and if it isn’t, that can do far more harm than good.

Nia as a protagonist has plenty of baggage about this. She’s introduced as a woman with deep abandonment issues – that is, she keeps abandoning people and then feeling bad about it (her ship is the Debby, after the kid sister who lived and died seeing her for a few days every fifteen years due to the time lag of interstellar shipping). She latches onto protecting and caring for Ahro almost more as an attempt at redemption for herself as anything about the boy himself, it’s only over time she really grows to love him as more than a talisman.

I can’t say it was particularly well-spent time, but the book does something I love at least the idea of. Nia’s crew is introduced in the second chapter with a fair amount of detail and personality, each of them having little idiosyncrasies and distinguishing habits and virtues; one is a best friend she found stranded on a wrecked hulk and nursed back to health. The whole dynamic is that of the grumbling and bickering but affectionate found family crew you’ve seen in a thousand other stories. So when she commits to spend up to fifteen years of her life taking care of Ahro on the galactic fringe in exchange for truly unbelievable amounts of money, she sits down with them, tells them the score, and asks them if they trust her enough to come with her.

And all but one of them say no, and never show up in the story again. Which is possibly the first time I have ever seen that kind of scene not end with re-commitment and affirmations of trust from at least most of the real characters that were asked.

This makes the whole found family situation with Nia, Ahro and (most of) the second crew that do spend years in the outskirts of ‘civilized’ space with them works for me far, far better than these things usually do. Because, unlike functionally every piece of fiction I can think of that’s ever been promoted as being about found families, this one really does sell it as something precious and exceptional, rare and worth fighting to preserve.

It also gets all but three of the people involved killed, of course, and of those three one’s permanently crippled and death would probably have been kinder for the second. The book’s really big on stretching ‘better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all’ to the absolute breaking point – right up to someone choosing not to die despite an existence of nothing but torture and pain just for the infinitesimal bit of hope and connection of a loved one singing through the prison bars.

The Banality of Evil

The villain of the piece is, without question, the monolithic and monopolistic Umbai Corporation, something between a neocolonialist conglomerate and a sovereign, expansionist empire in the classic sense with a few affectations from its earthborn roots (the specifics of the politics of Allied Space are vague and in any case more impressionistic than anything like a detailed speculative political economy). Which is kind of fascinating, in that it is specifically the Corporation as a corporate body that is the villain – agency and responsibility are spread across whole bodies of Allied nobility and corporate Judiciary officials, armored Yellowjacket thugs and career-minded techs and surgeons. There’s no CEO or President, no Board of Directors who set the agenda and bear ultimate responsibility – there’s no face to it at all, really. I’m fairly sure no agent of the company ever even appears twice. Which is just interesting on its own terms, given Umbai as an entity defines both the setting and the plot to dramatic degrees.

The world of the Vanished Birds is a horrifying dystopia in a hundred different ways, but until the very end of the book this just isn’t really something any of the characters particularly care about. It’s in the incidental details and the little asides in the exposition – that there is a great apparatus of censorship on every Allied world dedicated to controlling and slowing the rate of linguistic drift to ease the flow of time-shifted commerce, that the culture and economy of Umbai ‘Resource Worlds’ are societies deliberately starved of information and culturally engineered to be easily managed and quiescent single-commodity resource exporters. Even in the distant past, Umbai and institutions like it used their control over the Ark Ships escaping earth to filter the species – denying berths to (among a great many other things) anyone of ‘problematic’ politics or who seemed likely to be an economic burden.

It’s a universe where this system seems to spread inevitably and irresistibly, everything valuable bought up and parceled out for the benefit of the system’s functionaries diligent enough to save for occasional vacations, and the nobles and officials in the vaunted heights of far-off stations and City-Planets (the allegorical applicability is left as an exercise for the reader, a bit of restraint I did appreciate).

It is, again, not a system that’s worth analyzing as a speculative political economy or technical exploration of neocolonialism either present or future – but it’s not trying to be, either. And it works very well at seeming like a real, functioning world that the characters are just trying to live in.

The Anthropocene

Going off where most of its wordcount is spent, I’m not sure you could really call Birds climate fiction. But if someone was making that argument, I’m not sure you have too much ground to stand on arguing you shouldn’t either.

Fumiko’s first chapter, read as a stand-alone short story, absolutely is – the story of a love affair between genius savant designing the great orbital habitats which will sustain a lucky slice of humanity in the stars, and a talented but less world-shaping scientist doing what she can to lighten the burden of the remaining four fifths of the species being left behind upon the increasingly uninhabitable earth. This is where the book’s title comes from – the gradual disappearance of the birds Fumiko loved as a child, even from the sanctuary trying so ferociously to preserve them.

The world presented in that chapter feels just barely familiar enough to be unsettling, a scarred and fortified world that’s still on a clear and irreversible decline – which might be either chicken or egg to the fact that the commanding heights of government and industry have given up trying to save it entirely to focus on an escape to the stars.

For the rest of the book, environmental collapse isn’t really a topic that much comes up – though the human shaping of and impact on the environment certainly does. It’s just largely a matter of deliberate engineering.

There is, however, a very easy allegorical reading of the fact that on discovery of a way to travel instantaneously between stars, Umbai ruthlessly exploits and monopolizes it to attain unprecedented degrees of power and wealth as they reshape the entire galactic economy – all of galactic civilization, really – around the new technology. All without the slightest thought or care that this new technology is based on harvesting a specific and finite resource and their brave new world will collapse entirely without it. Omelas-child instead of oil but still – not exactly subtle, but I do appreciate the book restraining itself from directly and explicitly pointing it out.

Fumiko

The ‘millennium woman’ is probably the most interesting single character in the book, and also almost certainly the biggest structural weakness in the whole thing. Which is annoying to me, personally. She simultaneously has some of the best chapters of the book and also ends up feeling like a ball being tossed around as the plot requires.

Her Methuselah existence is only vaguely justified and explained, and it’s entirely unclear just how exceptional she is (beyond the fact she isn’t unique, anyway) – the story never even gestures to the existence of any of her peers beyond vague mentions of the Umbai executive class or Allied nobility. She’s an oligarch-savant with nigh-infinite resources and cadres of loyalists installed in every institution worth owning – until a single mistake is made and the powers that be unite in a perfectly coordinated strike to kill them all and leave her stranded in the torn up ruins of her private research colonies among the corpses of two thousand executed minions.

A character being ruthlessly crushed without warning or chance of contesting it by the powers that be rings more true when the character isn’t one of them, I suppose? As it was, it felt like being dropped into the climax of a story without any of the rising action.

The effect is, I think, at least mostly intentional. The entire chapter is about Fumiko being so distracted with the failures of her memory and a complete preoccupation with her latest project (Ahro) that she cannot even pretend to remember or care about this whole vast infrastructure she has built up for her own advancement and curiosity, or the hundreds of followers who treat her as a living saint (to the point of not even remembering her friend, confidant and second in command until the moment before he’s executed for, in essence, her failing to consider the consequences of breaking a minion’s heart). The fact that there’s a battlecruiser en route to bury everything she’s built in napalm and she just forgot to do anything to prepare is actually very plausible. In which case, I just wish it had been ore dwelt upon and made a point of. Or just – it felt like she really needed another chapter or two from her POV before things go horribly wrong, I suppose?

Her chapters are very well-done and affecting, to be clear. And her mirrored character arc with Nia – both women who get a certain pleasure out of other people caring about and being more invested in them than they are in return, both dealing cosmically poorly with rejection, both forever decorating their life in half-conscious memory of someone they left behind – is both well done and compelling (Nia gets better, Fumiko’s story in an elaborate murder-suicide/terrorist attack).

Too Long; Didn’t Read

Beautiful, emotionally affecting book. Very much a debut work from a talented author – experimenting and showing off a bit more than be supported, some fundamental structural weaknesses – but nothing I found detracted from the experience. Actually one of the quite rare books where sitting down and writing out a review has made me like it more rather than less.

#book review #sff #space opera #the vanished birds #simon jimenez

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