#ahead no matter how much i fucking LIKE DOING RESEARCH. LOL. ANYWAY
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my life has just turned into an endless grading cycle. i spent 6 hours grading one hw set today (and may not even be done with it lol). i ALSO have two more hws and a midterm (+ 1 more midterm once it hits wednesday) to grade. just kill me now lol
#why am i such a fucking failure that i cant even grade basic shit from A CLASS I ALREADY TOOK FROM THE EXACT PROFESSOR#why am i such a fucking failure that it takes 6 hours to grade 14 people. lmao#nobody cares aj#i havent been able to do any research at all in WEEKS and its destroying me because its proving even more that i should just quit while im#ahead no matter how much i fucking LIKE DOING RESEARCH. LOL. ANYWAY#im so fucking behind in everything (grading research the whole lot) and i feel like im drowning but its because of my own incompetence.#just fucking k*ll me now lmfao. god. christ. what am i even doing#(all of these are rhetorical questions. i dont want an actual answer or reply to any of those lol)#(that said. liking this post if you read through all these godforsaken tags would be nice.)#(not required in the slightest but you know. would be nice to be acknowledged. anyway
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miss vegas. how do u survive in college. please give me some tips. i am barely hanging on by a thread and it's only my first year. how do u do it. also ilysm.
hi nonnie 🌞. omg ofc! i used to live on campus, i don’t anymore which is way easier for me— also, don’t stress. first year can always be a lot and extremely overwhelming but i got uuuuu !!!!!! love u too
it's a lot of things i wish i knew as my first year LOL. i guess one thing that is probably super basic, don’t procrastinate. just get your stuff done so you don’t have to worry about it later ☝️ it’s easier said than done, but trust you’ll feel a lot better once you finish your assignments / projects early n on time !!! also, staying up late while working on stuff — don’t do that. it’s not good for you, and i always did that eheh. waiting ‘till the last minute of 11:59 to finish essays nuh uh. do your stuff as soon as it get assigned, DONT PROCRASTINATE 🫵 also, go to all your orientations. do nawt skip them
sleeeeeep. you need lots of sleep, regardless of what year you’re in it’s very important. i wish i knew that as a freshman 😀😀😀. i would stay up all night doin work, especially on the weekends. certified loser nerd. also, set an alarm !!!! if you’re a heavy sleeper like me, set a fuck ton of them !!!! or uh… have someone wake you up. i used to oversleep a lot, a way to prevent this is to usually go to sleep earlier than you usually do ( from my experience )
if you’re on campus, have some sort of map / guide so you know where you’re going !!!!! on my first day i literally got lost right away and i barely knew much english so it was even more embarrassing LOL. beeeee prepared !!!! ☝️ do research on ur school, they should provide those things — also, try to get those things ahead of time before your courses start so you aren’t askin random ppl where one of your rooms are. of course, its okay to still get lost anyway. it happens. ask for help if needed but make sure you’re prepared !!!
you don’t necessarily need friends to “survive” in college. everyone’s experience is different, but i found my experience easier by just keepin my circle small 🫂. IM NOT SAYING TO BE A LONER, you can have / make friends throughout your years ofc !!! in college, you’ll meet the best and worst people of your life. your main priorities should be yourself and your studies — but you come first at the end of the day. friends will always come & go, but eventually you’ll stumble across some nice ppl who share the same interests as you !!!
there’s prob super more important details but for the last thing i’ll say this— don’t let your grades define you 💓. it sucks majorly to get bad marks on something, especially if you stayed up countless hours on it, givin it your all. i personally have / had a habit of doing that, but never let it define you. if you truly think you didn’t get the right grade for any number of reasons, you can always talk to your prof about it in private. but don’t stress ab it !!! always remember you matter first over some exam 🫵
#✰ミ݁ ׅ ࣪ asks.#🧁#everyone's college experience is different — but try to have fun !!!!#make the most of it. you aren't alone. ☝️#one step at a time xxx
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4 (what is the plot bunny you’ve had longest and why haven’t you written it) and 11 (what’s something cool you learned in research for a fic, and how much do you worry about research)!!
(writing asks!)
4. !!!!!!!!!!!!11 I DON'T WANT TO SAY TOO MUCH AND SPOIL IT LOL (also I've told you about this one lol) but like back in 2018 I started outlining a Lestat/Nicki/Armand fic about like, Armand & Nicki's relationship and how much of an invisible presence Lestat was between them? I EVEN PICKED A TITLE FOR IT,
👀👀👀👀👀
Anyway it's gonna involve a lot of like mind gift dubcon and nonlinear storytelling, may or may not end with Nicki's suicide !
And the reason I haven't written it yet is that !!!!!!! AT THE TIME I was having a little trouble nailing down the outline and I felt kind of overwhelmed by how I wanted the fic to look & feel. I also am hung up around ending it on suicide even though it's canon it's just like so edgelord and bleak I don't know if that's what I want LOL. I also think I wasn't as brave about writing dubcon back then but yolo I'm over it!
I actually want to try to tackle this one soon!!!!!!!! I have a couple other fics ahead of it in line that I want to prioritize but if I'm still feeling like returning to it I might try to get it started by the end of the year??? FIVE YEARS LATER I FEEL I'VE HAD ENOUGH PRACTICE AND I FEEL LIKE A STRONGER WRITER WHO CAN HANDLE IT NOW.
11. RESEARCH IS SO IMPORTANT TO ME to a debilitating extent like. I don't know who the fuck cares or why it matters. It's stupid because when I write Sheith it's all sci-fi so I feel a lot freer to make things up because it's the future, but when I write VC I get extremely hung up on stupid details because I want to be ACCURATE that this could have HAPPENED.
Like, I'll look up concert dates, setlists, which museum a specific painting lived, etc, just so that it's all plausible. Even on Vamptember I got hung up wondering if there was a Radio Shack in Paso Robles in 1973 and I had to stop myself like WHO THE FUCK CARES ! JUST SAY HE WENT TO A RANDOM ELECTRONIC STORE LOL.
I can't recall anything very cool I learned that stuck with me though LOL. I did enjoy reading about the 70s gay scene in San Francisco !!!!!!!!!!
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good morning. i just woke up. i feel so disoriented. it was hot at night now it’s much cooler. Still pretty hot though. And i’m having gastric reflux :((
i should try more to eat better.
i saw such a weird dream. i saw we kept going to the same hill to hang out with my friend and her boyfriend and there were trains and i don’t know why but i feel like i was getting bullied or something.
aaaand now i can’t remember a thing about it. why do we always forget our dreams? isn’t that weird? if you experience a dream you would remember it no matter how less vivid it is. i’m sure there is research on this, i just don’t know it yet.
i often seem to forget what i want to say. i almost nearly forgot i wanted to type this lol. that’s kinda funny.
i studied like 80 slides yesterday. i’m so not ready to do the whole thing again. i have to go to the grocery store as well to get stuff.
i dont want to get up yet. i feel so cozy and the room is finally the right temperature.
i always feel the need to plan my day out. Maybe writing it down here helps. planning it out ahead helps with the anxiety i guess.
so. list of things i want to do today:
study (need to finish about 70+ slides)
go to the store to buy stuff (make list of stuff)
figure out the food situation
i have no idea what i should eat. i should cook i think. i should have 2 meals. One breakfast (nothing heavy just enough to not be hungry) and two dinner. i need to cook said dinner. i want to cook chicken rice. but will i be able to do it with study?
i feel like i should just study for these two days and finish off then cook. but i have no idea what to do about food until then.
actually, i have noodles. i will be okay. i even have eggs. i will be so okay. atleast for two days.
i just need to figure out breakfast now. what should i eat today. fruit is a good idea. but i get a little hungry after that. i could do cereal too that’s fast and easy.
i mean i’m going to the store i could get something
i got big distracted lol. i forgot what distracted me but i just found myself scrolling on insta.
anyway. gotta save money. no buying random shit. gotta cook at home.
and i have this.
my tummy hurts i need to poo. i swear i hate periods. i mean everyone who experiences it does atleast a little bit. i’m not one of those people. i HATE IT WITH A PASSION OF VOLCANO FIRE.
ugh im too cozy to go into anger right now.
ughhh i have to wake up and finish the fucking slides :(((((
or should i go to the store and get that done then study? that might be better. i won’t feel anxious about going out.
i will go in a bit i want to doze off more. till 11 am.
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Main character
April 9
We’re supposed to be the main character in our lives right? I don’t think I was meant to include the cameras at every angle, because that’s how I feel when I’m in public, like everyone’s eyes are on me and only me, watching and noticing everything I do. It disrupts my thinking pattern like a virus, and when that version of me takes over, I’m so anxious I become reckless and clumsy. I feel like all I need to do is just leave, I know this is in my head so I try my best. But it’s terrifying and intense, anyways that’s just me. Wby? Lol. I’ve officially ran out of weed for next 2 days :( I was thinking about getting some but should I? Lol idk, I’m anxious ugh yes I feel anxiety rn but shit it’s okay and no one’s looking at you or noticing your fucked up thoughts ahahaha so stop acting like it you fkn anti-social psychopath. Lol, I talk to myself in like all my wirings I wonder if it makes sense to people or if my writings are gibberish, don’t care either way,
I guess I had a good Easter I find it weird bc it feels just like a normal day… actually nah to be fair i went to work today n they like gave out Easter eggs to everyone who showed up to work lol, it was nice. I feel like I’m getting trapped in an old way of thinking right now and I need to stay up…. Work can be draining. Keep doing research on how to fix your black and white and other traits you don’t like…. I’m currently searching how to love my job lmao.
Thank god I like being alone, I’ve got a long life ahead of me.
Does scrolling on my phone make a habit of my brain constantly changing thought, I can’t focus, because I’m always looking and processing something different
Peace doesn’t feel so good right now, with being addicted and raised in chaos, but I think all I have to do is stay in it no matter how much I wanna leave, because leaving means going back to my old ways, and staying means levelling up.
#blogging#mental health#actually bipolar#actually borderline#mental instability#original post#original writing#original words#bipolar
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Home With You
Pairing: Matt Murdock x Reader
Word Count: 3003
Warnings: None.
Author's Note: I figured I should give you guys a break from my smutty contents lol. And I just wanted to write an indulgent fluff piece.
As always, every likes, comments, reblogs, feedbacks and ask submissions are greatly appreciated! My heart goes into cha-cha-cha mode whenever I receive notifications from you guys (it's a happy mode)
Prompt requested by: Anonyomous (love you anon <3)
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"Matt?!"
You called out as you walked into his apartment; the exhaustion crept into your voice. His name echoed back to you in the empty place, a tell-tale sign of Matt's absence. You huffed out a frustrated sigh as you stepped out of your heels, padding into the living room on bare feet, much to your relief. You dropped your briefcase to the floor with abandon, planting face-first onto the couch, releasing another weary sigh. This was the third night in a row you missed him on his way out, but it was nothing out of the ordinary. At this point, it had become a regular occurrence. You felt like you barely saw him as of late. All you had was the little time in the mornings with Matt's body wrapped around yours in the bed. And it wasn't enough. How could it be?
Your workload as a paralegal at Hogarth, Chao & Benowitz had picked up in the past few months. The pay was more than decent, but it resulted in more time assisting Jeri Hogarth in cases and less time spending with your boyfriend. The immense amount of guilt you felt kept building up, as you knew Matt was not happy about your situation, but he always knew what to say to make you feel better. You had spent time running around New York for researches, staying late at the office at Hogarth's requests.
The days would always end with you worn out to the bones. Matt hated how the job was clawing at you, chipping away a piece of you every day, leaving you stressed out and exhausted. But he was supportive anyway, understanding that it was your choice in the matter. And so, Matt was the only constant, comforting source in your life. He would be there every time you woke up, cuddling and kissing you, making sure that you had all your meals throughout the day, taking care of you when you couldn't do it yourself.
You dragged your enervated self into the shower, lathering yourself up with Matt's shampoo and body, indulging in his scent under the hot water. The clean smell of his soap in the shower steam helped relieve the ache of missing him in your chest. You had slept over his apartment every night. Still, ironic enough, you felt like you drifted away further from him, not of your own volition. Matt was the anchor that kept you close, but how long would it last? How long would he be willing to stay?
You patted yourself dry, walking into his bedroom, the air cool on your exposed skin. You opened the closet, pulling out a sweatshirt of his. You hugged it close to your chest, dropping your head low to inhale the smell of him. You pulled the shirt on along with his too-big sweatpants, tightening the strings at the waistband. You put on his socks, too, tucking them over the hems of the sweats, just like how he always did it. A habit of his that you had absorbed. A bittersweet thought struck you. Despite being in his apartment, often living in his space more than your own, you wore his clothes just to feel closer to him. He was close but never close enough.
You found your way to the couch again, plopping your head on the pillow. You curled into yourself, settling in a comfortable position. You didn't bother with dinner, for you craved something else. You just wanted him here. You wanted to spend every second you could get with him to make up for the time you had missed. You tried to stay up, waiting for him to come back. But the toll of the day pulled on your eyelids, luring you into sleep with much resistance from you.
A weightless feeling woke you from your sleep. You blinked sleepily; your hazy vision revealed Matt, still in his Daredevil suit, the helmet was nowhere in sight. His unseeing eyes radiated the comfort and affection you loved, and you hummed happily at the blessed sight of him. A smile pulled on the corner of Matt's lips as he laid you down on the bed, pulling the soft blanket over you. He brushed your hair off your eyes before leaning in, pressing a lingering kiss on your forehead. You smiled sleepily at his gesture, tilting your face up as his warmth left your skin. Your lips met his halfway, and you sighed into the kiss that you craved with the entirety of your being. You needed this, needed him; you yearned for him. Your hand found its way to him; his light stubble tickled your fingertips. You caressed his face, needing to touch, to feel him, as the kiss grew heavy. Finally, he pulled back from you with much reluctance, within your reach, just enough so you could hear his whisper.
"Have you had dinner? I left you your favourite in the fridge."
You pressed your head into the pillow before shaking your head, along with a muffled confirmation of his suspicion. His brows furrowed, and you quickly pulled on his jaw, drawing him closer. You resumed the kiss, and once again, Matt was the one who broke away. Lowering your voice in a soothing tone, you asked in the hope of distracting him.
"Do you have any injuries that needed to be looked at?"
"It was a pretty uneventful night. I know what you're doing, and it's not working."
He responded at once; his head shook slightly in disapproval. He knew you too well. You knew that. But you didn't want to get up while all you wanted was to bask in his familiarity, his warmth again.
"I had a very long day. I just want to go back to sleep, with you. Please?"
Your desperate plea tugged at his heart. His eyes softened as he pressed a chaste kiss to your lips.
"Alright. But you will have a big breakfast, first thing when you get up."
You bit your lip, brows waggling at him, even though you knew he couldn't see that. A playful, suggestive tone glided into your voice.
"Oh, I definitely would like something 'big' for breakfast."
He let out a small laugh at your terrible tease.
"I'm serious. I was gone for a few hours, and you already neglected yourself."
"I promise. I'll be yours for the entire weekend. Now, can you get your ass in this bed, preferably naked? Pretty please."
He chuckled, standing up to pull his protective gear off. A few rustles later, the mattress dipped as Matt climbed into the bed behind you. He pulled you into his chest, pressing butterfly kisses on your hair. You turned onto your back, giving him easier access to your lips. He eagerly took you on your offer, pulling you in for a soft kiss, so soft that it made you melt into his embrace. He moved to kiss your cheeks, making his way to your eyelids, ending the kiss on your forehead.
"Sleep now, sweetheart. I'll be here when you wake up."
You turned to your side to cuddle into him, curling your hand behind his muscular back. You nuzzled your face into his firm chest, kissing and nibbling sleepily on the naked skin. You fell asleep promptly, grateful for the weekend ahead of you.
Your phone buzzed again and again on Matt's bedside table. You groaned, burrowing your face further into Matt's chest. The faint scent of blood and sweat, of Matt, infiltrated your senses through a daze. However, whoever on the other side stayed persistent; calls came in after calls. Finally, you untangled your limbs from Matt's with frustration, answering the call to hear Hogarth's voice on the other side.
"Where the fuck are you? Why didn't you pick up your damn phone?"
"It's… it's the weekend."
"And? This case won't go away itself. Come in now, or you're fired."
Your ears met with the dead tone from the other line. You fell back onto the warm bed, feeling like you could burst into tears. Pressing your face into the pillow, you muffled a silent scream. Matt propped on his elbow, caressing your back with the other hand.
"Stay here. Quit the job. You deserve so much better than how Hogarth's treating you."
You murmured.
"I can't. Her words have weight. She can really help me with my career. The pay isn't bad either."
"I know, but it's not worth it. I don't like seeing you bend over backward to every of her demand. I can feel your exhaustion every night. I hate seeing you so harrowed and stressed out."
You sighed heavily.
"It's not like I can quit right away. Not until I can secure a better job somewhere else. Rent in Hell's Kitchen is crazy. Until then, I'm stuck with her."
You moved around in the place, talking to Matt as you got ready. When you stepped out of the bathroom into the living room, dressed in your work attire, Matt walked over to where you stood, offering you a cup of tea. You smiled sadly at him, stroking his cheeks. Then, you raised on your tiptoe, kissing him swiftly before picking up your briefcase, making your way to the door.
"I'm sorry, I can't drink the tea. I'm already late. I'll see you later tonight?"
Matt fell into silence; his head turned away from your direction. The mugs of tea in his hands stayed still and abandoned. You felt an awful jerk on your heartstring for leaving him like this. You spoke softly.
"I love you."
One moment of silence, then two. Matt reluctantly spoke, his voice small, barely audible.
"Love you, too."
You gnawed on your bottom lip in defeat, walking out the door. Your heart grew heavier with every step you took, carrying you further away from him.
When the elevator opened, you were working at your desk, just outside of Hogarth's office. You looked up just in time as the infamous P.I of Hell's Kitchen walked past your desk, sparing a glance towards you. You sprang up from your seat, running after her.
"Ms. Jones, I'm sorry, but you can't go in there. Unfortunately, Ms. Hogarth is not available at the moment."
Jones reeked of alcohol, but there was no sign of intoxication. She scoffed.
"I don't care if she's fucking another secretary in there. Step aside. I don't want to hurt you."
You stood in her path, taking your stance. Although preventing Jessica Jones from entering your boss' office wasn't your job, Hogarth made you do it anyway. She made you do many things that went beyond your responsibilities as a paralegal, as she always held her power over your head like an invisible sword, readied to strike at any given time.
Jessica rolled her eyes, sidestepping you. You stuck your foot out in her path, making her boot catch on your heel. She stumbled lightly, whirling around to face you.
"Seriously?"
You swallowed, shrugging.
"A girl's gotta do what she's gotta do."
"Maybe that girl should get another job and stop working for that monster."
Jessica quickened her pace, pushing the door open as you chased after her.
"I'm sorry, Ms. Hogarth, but she …."
"… tired of your shit, Hogarth. What the fuck is wrong with you?"
Jessica gritted out the words. Your boss sent a deathly glare at you.
"Leave us."
She flicked a wrist at you, and you closed the door behind you as fast as you could. You went back to your desk, speeding through your mountain of paperwork. About half an hour later, Jessica walked out with a menacing expression on her face, heading straight for the elevator. Jeri walked out about two minutes later, looming over your desk.
"If that happens again, I will personally destroy your little, pathetic career. You hear me?"
You nodded solemnly.
"Have them on my desk before 5."
Hogarth left you alone for the rest of your time there. You were done with the work at a little over 3 PM. You dropped it off, and it was refreshing to see a surprise expression on her face for once instead of the usual scowl you received. Then, you headed straight for Matt's place, couldn't wait to get back to your boyfriend, despite the little not-an-argument you had earlier that day.
He wasn't home when you got there. You sighed, afraid you had messed things up with him. After changing into something more comfortable, you sat down on Matt's kitchen table with your laptop open and a steamy plate of food Matt left you last night. You sat there, your fingers tapping away on your device for what felt like hours until you heard the sound of the door being opened. Matt walked in, dressed in his usual gym clothes with a duffle bag hanging off his shoulder. His face was flushed, his hair stuck out adorably. You stood up, lingering at the chair. You cleared your throat.
"I'm… sorry for this morning. Are we … okay?"
You ached to hug him, to be gathered into his arms, to kiss him. Your bottom lip trembled slightly. You wouldn't know what to do if he said no.
He could sense your uncertainty with every word. His face softened at your vulnerable disposition, his arms opened wide, dropping his cane and bag to the floor with little care.
"Of course we are."
You lunged into his embrace, holding him tight as he picked you up easily, his face buried in the crook of your neck. You found his lips, pouring your heart and soul into the kiss. Eventually, you pulled away from each other as you gasped for air, your foreheads touching.
Matt lowered you down to the ground, still holding you in his arms, his hand caressing your spine in a soothing motion.
"I'm looking up other jobs. Hogarth is … horrible, and I'm always stressed out. You're right. It's not worth it."
"You know … Nelson & Murdock can use a helping hand."
Matt raised his brow at you; an endearing grin pulled at the corner of his lips. You smacked his chest playfully.
"As if I'm not helping you guys in my free time already."
You trailed a finger from the waistband of his sweats, ghosting over his abdomen and chest, ended your way at the pulse on his neck, stroking the delicate arc of his throat. Matt let out a small groan of pleasure.
"That means you already have an in with the firm."
You squinted your eyes at Matt while he feigned innocence.
"Are you serious?"
"Yes. I would love to have you there. We still have to discuss this with Foggy, but I think he'd be thrilled."
The earnestness in his voice was unconcealed. Working for Matt and Foggy was a tempting proposal, but you wanted to give it some thought first.
"Let me think about it."
The week started anew, with another visit from Jessica Jones. Only this time, you didn't cease your work pace, even as she walked past your desk. Jessica halted, looking at you skeptically.
"Why are you not stopping me right now? Did Hogarth call of her little guard dog?"
You looked up from your computer screen, giving her a nonchalant shrug.
"Nah, the order is still in effect. But I don't care."
The P.I gave you a nod and headed for Hogarth's office.
Before the workday ended, you were summoned by your fuming boss. Hogarth stood at her desk, a glass of whiskey clutched tight in her hand. She looked upon your entry, sneering at you.
"What part of preventing Jessica Jones from entering my office that you didn't understand? Do you —"
"I understand. I just don't care."
You dropped off the folder on Hogarth's desk. She narrowed her eyes at the manila envelope.
"This is my letter of resignation. I quit. I would say it was an honour to work with you, but that would be a lie."
You left the office that day feeling so much better than you had felt in months. There was a spring in your steps as you climbed the stairs to Matt's place. You walked in as an aroma of mouthwatering food being cooked engulfed you, welcoming you home. Matt was in the kitchen, facing the stove. You walked up behind him, wrapping your arms around his torso. Matt lifted an arm over your shoulder, pulling you in to kiss your forehead. Then, he turned off the stove, fully angled his body to you and gave you a warm embrace.
"So you did it? How did she take it?"
"She was furious, Matt. She threatened to make sure I could never practice law ever again. Over and over. But I'm not worried. She can threaten me however she wants. I know the law."
"I'm so proud of you, sweetheart. You're better off without her. And if she dared to do that, you wouldn't be alone. Foggy and I will have your back."
You hugged him even tighter, pressing your ear to the steady rhythm of his heart. You stayed like that for a moment as the sound of Hell's Kitchen played in the background. Matt buried his nose into your hair, peppering your face with kisses. Then, at last, he spoke up.
"So, have you given more thoughts on working for Nelson & Murdock?"
You made a tsk sound, tapping a finger against your lips, pretending to be in deep thoughts.
"I don't know. Wouldn't it make quite a scandal since I'm dating one of the bosses?"
"Considering the other boss already knows about the arrangement, no one else has to. We can keep a secret -"
Matt dipped his head; his lips brushed over the curve of your ear purposefully. The mere contact sent a shiver down your spine in anticipation. Finally, he released the last part of his sentence; his voice dropped dangerously low, dripped in an alluring invitation.
"- and have fun with it."
#matt murdock#matt murdock x reader#matt murdock fanfic#matt murdock x you#matt murdock imagine#matt murdock au#matt murdock fic#matt murdock fluff#marvel imagine#daredevil#daredevil x reader#daredevil au#daredevil imagine#daredevil fanfiction#cellophaine 100 followers event#no use of y/n
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Starker High School AU, Pt. 2 (Pt. 1, Pt. 3, Pt. 4, Pt. 5)
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Peter will admit that during he took an extended moment during his journey home to grieve the loss of his free afternoon, and indeed the impending headaches.
And the rest of his future, if he was honest.
Not that Peter was prone to melancholy by any means, but with this assignment his fate was officially sealed, there was no misunderstanding. He was going to fail this assignment. He was going to, for the first time in his academic career, be forced to submit garbage of a caliber worthy of Tony Stark. It will forever be a black mark on his academic record.
No respectable college is going to accept him after this. In fact, he might as well drop out of school now and hit up Mr Delmar for a job. All of his prep for his MIT application is as good as useless after this. Extracurriculars? Goodbye.
Because it’s confirmed.
He’s doomed.
Swaying with the motions of the train, Peter types a text to Ned, the only person who might provide him with some much needed sympathy.
> I’m doomed > paired w/stark for an assignment lollllllllll. > help
Maybe Peter could trade with Ned. Maybe he could plead with their teacher, for honest fear of his life and scholastic integrity. He wasn’t even exaggerating. In no known iteration of this universe could Peter amicably work with Tony Stark. It would be like Harry Potter sitting down for tea with Voldemort, or Frodo and Sauron chilling with a pint and a pipe in Bag End.
It was unthinkable. Implausible. Laughable.
And Peter would laugh, were it anyone but him in this situation.
The feeling is unusual. Never had he found reason in his life to truly dislike anybody before, everyone could be redeemed or given the opportunity for penance. Natasha has said more than once that Peter would offer the devil himself a sandwich if he appeared.
Tony Stark on the other hand? No sandwich for him.
Well, maybe a slice of bread. A stale one.
While he waits for Ned to responds he catches sight of his injured reflection in the train window, which is admittedly pretty gnarly. Even with his hood drawn up, there was a noticeable berth allocated to him in the busy carriage between himself and the other passengers.
< sux. can I have ur lego hogwarts if u die?
> dude :( pity me.
< lol. so, can i?
Peter sighs.
> sure. Look after May for me, bro. delete my internet history.
< deal. godspeed
Pocketing his phone, Peter wonders if it’s too late to take up praying.
---
By the time he’s back in his apartment his mood has managed to swing back up.
Tony Stark is not going to be the arbiter of Peter’s fate. Hell no. He’s smart, he’s creative and hardworking - it isn’t up to anybody but Peter to determine his outcomes. If he has to do the assignment with Stark then he will. And he will work his hardest.
If he has to do it sharing the credit with Stark, well, Peter knows a concession when he sees one.
No matter how reluctant he is.
But he powers through it, like ripping off a bandaid. It’s fine! He’s a Parker and he’s come this far in life already against ill, Parker-like odds. What was being paired for one assignment with someone who escaped the nearest hellmouth?
It’ll be fine.
Probably.
Not letting himself linger on his fears, Peter clears out his previous plans of going on a YouTube spiral and eating sour gummies until his teeth stick, instead utilising the time to get his foot in and and begins prepping for the assignment. Cursory, preliminary research at first, before the inevitable deep dive begins.
Neanderthal, Peter scoffs, mad all over again. Who is Stark to call Peter a neanderthal? He’s second in his class. He’s a straight A student. He likes school.
And as much as he is moderately skilled in, and enjoys JV, it’s not like he received his scholarship to study at Midtown based on his physical prowess.
The graze on his cheek that stings every time he yawns is proof of that.
Stark can eat his entire ass and choke on it, he thinks darkly, as he continues his research. He doesn’t know the first thing about Peter.
The data is sobering as he delves into job listings and statistics of his projected salary in a three year margin. This is really what his teachers earn? Wow. Depressing.
The contrast of expected salary versus the forecast of steep student loans is disheartening further still.
Teaching quietly slips from second to third on his list of ideal occupations.
Turning on a playlist on his phone, Peter continues to compile notes, amassing a truly gargantuan amount of tabs on his browser. His computer, old enough to be on its’ last teeth, whirrs loudly in protest.
It’s not until his room goes dark that he thinks to check the time.
Ah, shit. It’s nearly six.
Peter pauses. Should he tidy up the apartment?
...Nah, no point in breaking a sweat for Stark.
He continues typing. Then he hesitates, fingers suspended in mid-air.
But what if Stark sees his unfolded laundry out on the dining table and publicly shames him for his old-but-comfortable Bulbasaur themed boxer shorts?
Goddamnit.
---
A quick, cursory clean ensues and leaves a relatively orderly Parker apartment. No freshly laundered underwear is in sight.
Peter wraps up just a few minutes before six. Right on time.
Taking a seat at the now clear dining table Peter drums his fingers on the surface and waits.
And waits.
And waits.
---
He knows when Tony finally arrives when he hears the sound of a car pulling up outside his apartment block. The riffs of a Roxette remix can be heard playing loudly from the ground to the seventh floor of his apartment, the bass so thunderous it reverberates the windows all the way up to his floor.
Drumming his fingers on the kitchen table, Peter checks the wall clock again. It’s nearly seven.
Tony’s late.
Not that Peter is particularly affected with surprise that Tony is incapable of following basic instructions, but still. Really? Really?
By the time there is a knock on his door, Peter is already before it, his arms crossed over his chest and a scowl on his face. Every second between Tony pulling up and his ascent to Peter’s floor has him positively fuming. He can’t believe how this day played out. It started with such promise. He had such innocuous, but high hopes.
Clearly, he miscalculated.
Feeling a touch petty, he waits to answer, listening to Stark knock a second and then a third, more insistent time before he rouses enough calm to open the door.
He instantly regrets it when he does.
Tony’s expression is curious one as he breezes right passed Peter without waiting for further invitation. There’s a smudge of something dark on his brow, his otherwise white undershirt smeared in dark stains.
Peter watches incredulously as the other boy drops his backpack by the door with a thump.
“You’re late.”
He closes the door behind Tony and scowls at the other boys easy posture, hands shoved into his pockets, eyes taking in the apartment.
“I didn’t realise you lived all the way out in fucking Queens. Do you have any idea how bad traffic is at this time of day? Also, your elevator doesn’t work. I just climbed seven flights of stairs, where’s the hospitality?”
“Try earning it.”
The other boy rolls his eyes. “Like it’s worth my time.” He breezes past Peter and slides his leather jacket off his arms, tossing it atop of his backpack in the corner. “Look, I’m here now. Okay? You can unclench now. So, do I get a tour or what?”
“Or what. This wouldn’t have been an issue if we had just started straight after class like I said.”
“Oh I’m sorry,” Tony clutches his hands to his heart before gesturing to the room. “I didn’t realise I was interrupting your busy Friday night, Parker. You got a keg and the rest of the meatheads stashed away somewhere?”
Without waiting for a response, Tony wanders around the living room like a curious child in a new play room. His gaze inspects everything all at once, from peering at up close at the wall mounted photos and hovering his grubby hands over the oddments and knick-knacks speckled throughout the space.
Apprehensive, Peter can’t help but shadow him, afraid he just let loose a hurricane in a china shop.
Without asking, Tony picks up May’s old Magic 8-Ball and gives it a good shake. Peter’s fingers itch to reach over and stop him, but stops himself because then that would require actually making direct skin contact the other boy.
Not worth it.
“Cannot predict now. Huh,” Tony says to himself before placing the ball back in the wrong spot.
They both watch silently as it rolls precariously close to the edge.
“Anyways,” Tony helps himself to an armchair, lounging back and spreading his legs wide. “I know your long-term memory is probably as defective as the rest of you, so don’t strain yourself recalling that I had other priorities.”
“Like what?”
“Like literally anything that isn’t being around you,” the other boy grins. “Now, are we doing this thing, or did you invite me over so you could bitch at me?”
“I didn’t invite you,” Peter grumbles, swiping his notebook from the dining table before sitting on the sofa, as far away from Stark as possible. Shifting, he takes his phone from his pocket and opens the notes he’d taken earlier.
“So, I cross referenced some websites and current job listings,” Peter scrolls through his research, adjusting his glasses as they slip down his nose. “Assuming you have no savings, we’re looking at an average of sixty-thousand per annum based on my salary alone. The average rent in --”
“-- Uh, why are we assuming I have no savings?”
"Because... we’re being realistic?”
Tony springs to his feet and paces across the living room.
“Well,” he says, gesturing to Peter, “if we’re being realistic, does having no savings also that mean I have no debt -- or are you paying off two student loans on your salary?”
“I don’t --”
“Do we have car loans? Health insurance?”
“Wait, slow your roll, Stark. I haven’t yet --”
“-- Of course you haven’t. I mean really, Parker, do you ever think ahead? You should try it, we do have a baby on the way, you know.” Tony clicks his fingers and points at Peter. “Oh, names! I want to call it Molly.”
“As in the drug?”
“No, as in Ringwald. Anyhoo, seeing as only one of us has the intellectual capacity to construct a budget,” Tony gestures to himself, “that would be me, consider maybe that I spent my savings paying off my student loans and bought a car for me and Miss Molly, leaving you with just your own stagnant debt. Happy?”
“Thrilled,” he says through clenched teeth, feeling utterly steamrolled. “But we’re not calling the baby Molly.”
“Yes, we are. Think of all the great nicknames. Hey wait,” Tony pauses in his pacing, “are your parents going to be home soon?”
It was in that moment Peters world narrows down to one, botched cosmic joke.
Turning his gaze heavenwards, Peter prays silently for mercy. What did he do to deserve this. This is all his bad karma come at once. This is the bad place.
“Ah, no,” he replies, eyes widening. “No, my parents are not going to be home soon.”
“Cool. Lucky you.”
Oblivious to Peter’s existential turmoil, Tony resumes his patrol through the living room, picking up a frame on the mantle. It houses an old photo of Ben, May and a young, bespectacled Peter.
It is one of the more embarrassing immortalisations of his younger self, eleven-years old and grinning widely, bearing his silver braces to the camera as he holds up a science fair trophy, curls wild and untamed.
Oh god. That was exactly what Peter needed on this unholy day - Tony Stark in his living room, witnessing Peter in his prepubescent glory.
Quick, create a diversion.
“So, as I was saying,” he says loudly, “rent is reasonably affordable with a sixty-thousand budget in --”
“Who’s the babe?” Tony points to a younger Aunt May in the photo.
Peter gets to his feet and removes the frame from Tony’s grasp. He glowers as he places it back on the mantle.
“No one you would have a chance with. Can you stay focused? Like, are you physically capable of it?”
“Okay, calm down,” Tony holds his hands up in surrender. “You’ve got a lot of anger for someone so vertically challenged, you know that, shortstack?”
“Focus, dumbass.”
“I’m focused! Let’s see, we’ve established that I am excellent at managing my money. You have a shitty job and a shitty salary, and apparently my imaginary future self has terrible taste in men. So. Have I got that right? Where are we living?”
“Queens. LIC has some one bed, one baths that could be affordable.”
“Uh, rewind. Going to have to eighty-six that - I am not living in Queens.”
Peter stares at him.
Tony rubs his hands over his face and sighs. “Fine, whatever. But I want a Pontiac Firebird in this imaginary life if I have to deal with you.”
“For someone so keen on getting away you’re doing your best to prolong this experience. It’s literally painful.”
“Well, I just like to see you get all riled up, Princess,” Tony grins, leaning back against the mantle and folding his arms over his chest. “You have this vein that bulges on your forehead when you’re mad. Makes you look like a pitbull.”
Peter swallows the particularly acidic retort sitting on his tongue and tries not to let Tony’s words sting. Be the bigger man, Ben used to say. As difficult as it is to channel even a modicum of the mans’ eternal patience, Peter takes a deep breath and reminds himself to stay focused. The less he gets sidetracked by Tony’s fuckery, the sooner it’s over.
He mentions the next part with unease.
“...Miss Ahn said that we need references and should do field research. Speak to realtors. Ask people who have a similar lifestyle and budget.”
The look that comes over the other boys face is one of unequivocal revulsion. Peter can relate. The thought of having to spend more time with this guy makes his stomach turn.
“Well, Parker, any bright ideas who we can ask?”
The hinges of the front door squeaks before Peter can respond.
Moments after, Aunt May walks into the living room, placing her bag down on the dining table. She looks between the two boys curiously.
“Hey, Pete,” she comes to his side to squeezes his shoulder. “Who do we have here?”
Tony rushes over with his hand outstretched, an eager grin on his face.
“Tony Stark, ma’am. It’s a pleasure to meet you.”
“Oh, ah, okay, well,” May laughs as he enthusiastically shakes her hand. Her eyes are soft as Tony smiles brightly at her. “Nice to meet you too, Tony. I’m May, Peter’s aunt. Are you... friends with Peter?”
Peter snorts.
“Definitely not. We just have an assignment --”
“-- Great friends, actually,” Tony talks over him, taking a seat beside Peter on the sofa. To Peter’s utter disgust, the other boy puts an arm around his shoulders, squeezing his bicep encouragingly. “Aren’t we, Pete? Hmm? Best buds. We go way back.”
Peter freezes, feeling the line of heat from Tony’s against his side, the weight of his arm on his body.
Eyes widening, he feels his skin crawl.
“That’s sweet,” May smiles, putting her hair up in a loose, messy bun. “Well, I don’t know about you boys, but I’m starving. I’m ordering pizza, Friday special. You should stay for dinner, Tony.”
Tony places his free hand on his chest.
“I would be honoured.”
May looks at Tony strangely before retreating to the kitchen to retrieve the menus.
As soon as she’s out of sight Tony takes his arm off Peter and quickly shifts away from him like he’s been burned.
“Dude,” Peter whispers, bewildered. “What the fuck?”
“Oh my god,” Tony whispers, shuddering as his face scrunches up in disgust. “I’m going to have to pour scalding hot water on all the places your skin just touched me. Ugh, I feel like I just touched toe fungus.”
Peter slaps his arm.
“What is wrong with you?”
Tony backhands Peter’s arm in retaliation and then shudders all over again.
“Your aunt is crazy hot, okay, I couldn’t help myself. It was an instinctual reaction. Is she taken? C’mon. Vindicate me.”
“I’ll eviscerate you --”
“-- I mean, clearly she married into the family, she doesn’t share your unfortunate phenotype, but I didn’t see a ring on her finger. So? Yes or no?”
“You’re unbelievable,” Peter hisses as his aunt comes back in. “She’s not available to you. Not now, not ever.”
“But she is available?”
“Don’t even, Stark. You’re like, sixteen. Don’t you have any shame?”
Tony smiles, as she nears. “Not a shred.”
“So,” May waves a menu at them. “You boys happy with pepperoni?”
Closing his eyes, Peter wishes for death.
As fate would have it, he gets pepperoni instead.
-----
If you had ever told Peter that he would be sitting down for dinner with his Aunt and a dirt-streaked Tony Stark, he would have laughed.
And if Peter were outside himself he would probably find the sharing of pizza and soda over their plastic, chequered table-cloth comical -- in that uncanny, Dogs Playing Poker kind of way. But in reality there was nothing funny about the discomfort of having Tony in his personal space or the heavy, suffocating tension that has removed the air from the room.
The entire time Tony has been hamming it up, cracking jokes with his aunt, complimenting her on the decor, asking what she does for work. Peter doesn’t know if he’s being sweet to May for the purpose of buttering her up, or, given the wealth of his family in contrast to the Parkers, if he’s being cruelly facetious.
Nonetheless, Peter has felt on edge. It’s disconcerting, is what it is. Every single movement Tony makes, every time he opens his mouth -- frequently to sweet-talk his aunt -- has Peter’s anxiety standing at attention, hyperaware of everything the other boy does.
He’s beginning to feel like a meerkat whose den has been invaded by a lion.
Through the course of a single meal Peter’s attention moves from the sky to the floor. There is no grace or higher power that is coming to save him from this profound, unusual torture.
So he focuses his hopes to the south, seeing through their tiny, cramped, dinner table, past bargaining. He’s willing to trade his soul to end it all. Surely some wayward being from hell would come to his rescue.
May has Peter’s chin between her fingers. She turns it this way and that, inspecting his injuries.
“What happened this time, bubby?” She frowns, brow furrowing. “You look like you got beat up.”
Peter, very aware of Tony’s amused gaze on them, gently pulls away from her grasp. He smiles placatingly and picks at his pizza slice. God he’s never going to live this down.
“Training accident. It’s okay, I feel fine. ‘Tis but a scratch,” he brings himself to joke.
“You sure?”
“Yep.”
She leans in to kiss his cheek, carefully avoiding the fresh scabs and injured flesh. “God, you bruise like a peach. Be careful, baby, you’re our money maker,” she laughs. “What about you Tony, do you play football?”
Tony, who is mid way through chewing on a mouthful of pizza, momentarily chokes, beating his chest with his fist to swallow down the obstruction.
“Uh, no,” Tony gulps, wiping his mouth with a napkin. “Nope. No recreational sports for me. Can’t.” He gestures to his chest and sighs heavily. “Asthma.”
Peter sips his coke and rolls his eyes, knowing full well there’s a half-empty pack of Marlboro Light’s in the pocket of Tony’s jeans. Asthma. What a schmuck.
“That’s a shame. Do you boys have classes together?”
Unfortunately, Peter thinks.
The other boy seems to have the same thought, as he glares at Peter from over the table. When he picks up his can of coke, he gives Peter the finger outside of May’s eye-line.
“That’s why Tony’s here,” Peter twists his napkin in his grip. “We have an econ assignment together on microeconomics. Teach says Tony’s destined to be on welfare.”
Tony leans in, chin rested on his hand. He addresses May but his stare, dark and odious, rests on Peter.
“Not accurate. Stay-at-home parent, actually. One might say that is the most important job of all. Wouldn’t you agree, May?”
She raises her Coke.
“Hear, hear.”
Tony grins roguishly, the same grin he gave the girls at the lockers earlier. “Petey here was just saying that we should ask you about your experience running a household on a single salary. We’d love to have you as a reference.”
“Was I saying that?” Peter narrows his eyes. “I can’t remember.”
Tony kicks him under the table. The hit lands right in his knee cap.
Wincing, Peter kicks back, satisfied when the other boy bites his lip to hold back a pained groan.
“Yeah, well, not surprising,” Tony says airily, waving his hand. “Hit your head today, didn’t you? Maybe you should get all that damage looked into.”
The napkin rips in Peter’s grasp.
“Maybe you should go f--”
“I’d be more than happy to help with your assignment, boys,” May cuts in.
Whatever snide reply he has in his mouth instantly wilts when he looks over to his Aunt. She looks...pleased. Delighted, almost. Her eyes under the dull, yellow kitchen light seem to get warmer, and her smile is small but softens around the edges.
Instantly, Peter feels like the worst person in the world. Of course May would be the best person to ask. She does so much for him, the least he can do is set his pride aside for one moment to make her feel good about how hard she works for their life.
He reaches over to squeeze her hand, smiling as gratitude swells unexpectedly in his chest.
“Thanks, May. That would be great.”
Across the table, a smug Tony looks like the cat who got the cream.
Without warning, Peter’s chest goes hot with contempt, his fingernails dig into his palm. He’s not sure he’s ever met anyone he couldn’t like, until now.
I hate you, Peter mouths while May busies herself with rounding up the pizza boxes.
Kiss my ass, Tony mouths back.
In an instant his expression flips from contemptuous to angelic when he stands and offers to help May clean up.
Peter stands too, sparing a disdainful glance to the floor. Turns out not even the devil was willing to give him a hand.
Natasha was right. It’s going to end in murder.
---
Peter walks Tony to the door after dinner to say goodbye to his ‘friend’. Following him into the hall, Peter closes the door behind them.
“What do you want, Parker?” Tony asks wearily, retrieving a cigarette from his pocket. “I’m trying to make a getaway here.”
Peter crosses his arms over his chest. “Don’t do that with my aunt. I’m not joking, asshole. It’s not cool.”
“Relax, princess,” Tony rolls his eyes, fishing for his lighter in his backpack. “I’m not actually interested. Just trying to get under your skin. Worked, see? You’re easy like that. Hey, why do you live with your aunt anyways?”
“None of your business,” he frowns as Tony holds one hand up in surrender and lights his cigarette with the other. “Dude, you can’t smoke in here.”
“Can’t, shouldn’t, gonna. By the way, you’ve got sauce on your chin, it’s very distracting.”
Peter wipes at it without thinking. When he pulls it away there is indeed a smear of red sauce on his hand.
Tony walks backwards down the hall and exhales a cloud of smoke, waving in a sardonic imitation of a farewell.
“See you Monday, bubby.”
Peter doesn’t bother with a response, too tired from the week, exhausted by this whole darn day, and it’s not like the other boy cares what he has to say anyway. He takes a moment to swallow his anger before he heads back inside, sighing.
Well, at least he has an entire weekend free of Stark to look forward to.
May looks at him curiously when he reemerges, but says nothing. He considers for a moment about heading to his bedroom and playing a video game to disassociate - but then, suddenly, remembers her smile earlier, and how alone she looks now. A surge of affection hits him right beneath his breastbone.
He checks his watch and then catches her eye. Tilting his head towards the living room, he says, “Hey. You wanna eat some ice cream and watch some Colbert before bed?”
She smiles just like she did earlier and kisses his cheek. “Sounds nice, Pete.”
Maybe the whole day wasn’t lost.
As May heads to the sofa and switches the TV on, Peter catches sight of the Magic 8-Ball from the corner of his eye. He walks over and gives it a shake.
Outlook good.
*
*
----
tagging: @bylerboyfriends @ravens-starker-stuff, @starker-rays, @ironspiderstarker, @notfor-temporaryuse, @tabbycat1220, @sugarfreecult, @rebel13lion39, @muse-of-gods
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Do you take lessons for anything? No. I’ve done so in the past, but not at the moment.
Has something really heavy ever fallen on you? Other than siblings or cousins from when we played together as kids, I don’t think so.
If you wear makeup, what colors do you usually wear? I never wear makeup but whenever my friends have used my face as a practice stage (lol) they’ve usually just used natural or nude-ish colors, which I find look okay on me.
Does your shower have curtains or a glass door/wall? It has a sliding door. I’m not sure what material it’s made out of, but I can tell you it’s at least not glass.
If you have more than one pet, do they ever get jealous of each other? Cooper does tend to bark and/or whine when he sees me giving more attention to Kimi, but not always. Kimi couldn’t give less of a crap, but this is also because he is 13.
Is there a room in your house that you don’t like going in? I used to not like being inside my bedroom, especially after the breakup. For a long time it was a place I only associated with crying and breakdowns, so when I was doing the arduous task of starting over I haaaaated staying there because it only hurled me right back to square one. But I’m happy to say that I eventually got better, had enough strength to change the narrative for my room, and now I like being here again :)
Do you remember the last question you were asked? What did you answer? My mom just asked me to watch Cooper because he was having the zoomies.
Besides salt and butter, do you put anything on your popcorn? Not a big fan of popcorn but if I had to pick a topping, I’d go with cheddar cheese.
Are you lonely? I’ll feel it sometimes, but it only lasts for a moment or so.
What’s your favorite magazine to read? Wow I haven’t read a magazine in years.
Do you like pineapple? I hate it. In all forms. The pizza debate doesn’t even matter to me lmao, I just think pineapple downright sucks.
Have you ever seen fireflies? They used to be common in our village when we first moved in, back when there were only like 3 houses in the neighborhood (we were one of the first to move in here). As more houses were built and the place got more occupied the fireflies gradually lessened until they disappeared altogether.
Have you ever trespassed? I very vividly remember taking multiple trips to the school cemetery back in grade school (I went to Catholic school and ours had a cemetery below our chapel, where all our deceased nuns were housed...I really shouldn’t be talking about this at 10 PM...). I am 100% sure that was an off-limits area but we went there anyway because we were a naughty group of kids and because no one was guarding the area.
Do you tell your parents where you are going? Yeah; if I live with them, they have the right to know. < Ooh, I’ve never even thought about it this way before but this is a very good point. I’ll second this, haha.
Do you agree with the notion that all people were created equal? Yes.
Do you raise your hand or participate in class? God never. I hid as much as I can and only recited if I was called on purpose.
Do you like visiting the mall? Why or why not? I like the malls that we have. But then again, malls are the only decent public spaces we have - we don’t have public libraries, parks, playgrounds, etc. – so it’s not like I have a choice on where I can go if I want to go out.
Have you ever purposely hurt an animal? Yeah I kill bugs when I see them. Soz, I have no feelings for them whatsoever.
Would you ever see a therapist? I planned to finally do this last year but it just fell through haha and eventually I was able to care for myself too. Now that I’m doing a lot better for the most part, I feel like I’d have no clue what to talk about once faced with one.
Are you afraid of heights? Only if I had to jump all the way down. But if I ever found myself staying at an extreme height simply to enjoy the view, or if I was ever in one of those towers where the top floor’s floor is made out of glass, I think I would enjoy that.
Are you afraid of the dark? I always say I’m usually not afraid of the dark, and will only be if I was in a situation that was intended to scare me. I would definitely be afraid of the dark if I was in like an abandoned cave or a haunted house, but I would also find the darkness in my room comforting.
Are you a jealous person? When I am it’s mostly been in a playful sense and rarely serious.
When is your birthday? April 21st.
What are you listening to right now? My very very old aircon doing its very very loud whirring thing. It’s become a running joke in the family because it is literally SO FUCKING LOUD hahahaha Have you ever been caught doing something you weren’t supposed to be doing? As a goody-goody, I can only ever do this to my mom; but yeah, she’s caught me many times.
Are you still friends with someone from kindergarten? Sure, but I’m not ~close friends with any of them. Just chummy enough to like their photos on social media once in a while or greet them happy birthday. My oldest friend was from Grade 1.
What is the most important thing to you? Being happy with myself and making sure I don’t miss out on life and opportunities.
Do you like whipped cream? I can take it or leave it.
Are you close to your mother? We get along but not close.
Are you close to your father? I’m closer to him in the sense that I would be more comfortable around him, but we’re also not physically or emotionally close.
Do you walk around bare foot when you're at home? Or do you wear socks? I am Asian hahaha what do you think?
Do you like chocolate popsicles? Sure! One would sound lovely right now, actually.
Would you ever be your school’s mascot who wears that costume? Both of the schools I’ve attended don’t have mascots.
Would you rather see the Great Wall of China or Big Ben? Great Wall for sure. Sorry but I can’t see myself getting excited over a giant clock, and I’m sure there are other lovely spots in London I’d much rather visit.
Have you ever written a poem? Always unsuccessfully. It’s never been my forte.
Would you ever be a tornado chaser? That’s a thing? Uh...no way??
What is your favorite thing to eat with bbq sauce, if you even like that stuff? Pizza. And anything, I guess. Barbecue sauce is the bomb.
Your parents tell you that this summer, you get to pick the vacation. Where do you plan to go? Covid notwithstanding and budget permitting, probably New York City.
What do you think is a good theme for a prom? I could not care less.
Have you ever had to do a class in summer school? Thankfully, never.
Do you get nervous when you go to the doctor? About what? You know, I’ve always thought going to the doctor was no sweat until I realized just how nervous I was when I had to book a telemedicine consultation once as part of my job (PR can make you do the most random, out of context things sometimes, I swear haha). I surprised even myself with the reaction I had when I found out I had to do it, and how I felt like declining the offer...I guess I was scared about the possibility of underlying health issues suddenly being unearthed. Your whole life can always get turned upside down in the blink of an eye with just one diagnosis.
Have you ever been to the rainforest? I’m pretty sure the climate I live in is called tropical rainforest, so I guess yeah.
Have you ever created a website? Not from scratch. I had always made it under an umbrella website, like Blogspot.
Ever thought about writing a book? Sure, as a kid.
Have you ever had a dream where you killed someone? No. Whenever I have dreams of that nature it’s always me or a loved one being killed, but never me doing the killing.
Do you ever make up stories in your head and wish they come true? Yes.
Which is worse: stuffy nose or runny nose? Stuffy. It sucks not being able to breathe freely.
Which is worse: Sick to your stomach or sore throat? I super hate sore throat. I already get stomachaches frequently, so even though I know how sucky it can be I feel like the discomfort would be bigger with a sore throat.
Do you think your last relationship was a disaster? The way it ended was, but it wouldn’t be fair to myself to invalidate the genuine happiness I felt when I was in it.
Have you ever solved a Rubik’s Cube? Never.
Who do you think is the easiest to talk to? Angela.
Would you consider yourself to be emo? No.
Do you have a favourite metal band or do you not like metal? Not really, no.
What is your current desktop picture? It’s just one of the provided desktop photos on my Mac.
Thick or thin blanket? Thick.
Who are your favorite bands? Paramore, Coldplay, and Against Me!
How do you mark through your word search puzzles? Depends on my mood. Sometimes I’ll strike through and sometimes I’ll go ahead and encircle the entire word altogether.
Have you ever sewn something? I’ve done embroidery...does that count?
What did you eat for dinner last night? We had breakfast for dinner, actually hahaha so my dad made an omelette, hotdogs, and tapa.
Ever been grounded? If so, for what? Continued from last night. Yes, I was caught cursing all over Twitter when I was like 11 so my parents cut off my access to all my gadgets for a year or so. Which, in retrospect, is an acceptable consequence for my actions, but we’re also talking about a time when schools were starting to view the internet as a necessity in doing homework and research. I missed out on nearly all my homework for a while, and my mom didn’t buy it when I kept telling her I needed to do my research over the internet. At the same time, she kept demanding why my grades weren’t doing so well when she was the reason they kept being pulled down...so yep, not a very fun time.
Have you seen all of the Jaws movies? No and I don’t really have the desire to. Doesn’t seem like my kind of movie.
When was the last time you played cards? (not on the computer) Maybe 2 or 3 years ago.
Have you ever drank Cherry Coke? No, I don’t drink any soda.
Have you ever had a black eye? Nope.
Have you ever eaten a bug? Not to my recollection, but I would love to try cooked crickets and whatever bug can be prepared and eaten.
Do you like pranking people? Never; the idea makes me cringe since I never know when it’s considered going too far. I’d rather watch people prank other people.
Did you ever take a cooking class in school? Yeah, but we were required to take it. We also had some baking sessions, which to me was a lot more fun. I remember having to make macarons and rainbow cake which are both right up my alley, heehee.
Do you celebrate St. Patrick’s Day? No, idk what that is. I just know people turn everything green on that day lol.
Do you use Skype? I’ve never used Skype on my own. That’s where I used to talk to my dad for video calls maybe around a decade ago, whenever he was abroad; but I never had my own account. These days I alternate among Microsoft Teams, Google Meet, or Zoom.
Have you ever participated in local magazine cover girl searches? I don’t think so, but I did join a few contests on some of those kid’s magazines we used to have...none of which I won.
Have you ever been called a skank/slut because of the way you dress? No.
Is your ex sexually attractive to you still? I haven’t seen her in 5 months, which helps...that said, I simply feel nothing. I’m neither sexually attracted nor not sexually attracted to her.
Describe the most romantic moment you’ve ever had. I can think of one but I don’t see the point in still raising it, considering where I am in life right now.
Have you ever cheated on a test? Yes, once. I hated it.
Have you ever been to couple’s counseling? Nope.
How often does your employer ask you to work overtime? A few times a week. Sometimes I’ll do it willingly as well just to get the task over with or to save myself some deliverables the next morning. I’m fine with OT-ing tbh; since I work from home, I feel like my time is a lot more flexible.
Did you often read for fun when you were a kid? I read A LOOOOOT as a kid. I was a total bookworm. < Yeah, same. You could always find me bringing a book to school and reading during breaks, even though they technically didn’t allow us to bring any non-academic book. My spark for reading died when I was around 12, same time as when my depression started to kick in, and it never really came back.
When was the last time you were scared? Someone from the media called me up yesterday VIA LANDLINE to ask a question about a press release I had sent out that day. I usually read up on the materials we have, but I honestly didn’t give a shit about that particular story and didn’t really make an effort to know more about it, so I found myself stumped when he dropped the question. I ended up stalling for a bit before I was able to stutter an answer, so that was scary, but at least he was nice. Also, I hate phone calls.
What’s your favorite song by Rihanna? KISS IT KISS IT BETTER
Can you speak binary? No, I never understood it.
Would you rather live somewhere that had hurricanes or tornadoes? I already do, at least for hurricanes. I imagine I’d be terrified of tornadoes.
Have you ever had a pet that you disliked? Nooooooo, never. I was never close to Arlee but I still did my best for her to like me, and always fed her whenever my sister would be in her dorm.
When was the last time you saw hail? Never. Doesn’t happen all that often here, and when it does it’s always in the provinces.
What is on your mind right this second: I want to spend my remaining time awake reading fanfic (I’m into them again, omg) but I also wanna finish surveys...so I’m doing my best to breeze through this so I can finally look for something to read hahahahaha.
Have you ever given a nickname to your pet(s)? Cooper is Cooperino to me. Sometimes I’ll call him Cooperino Cappuccino. Kimi is Kimchi, Kimmerl, Kimberly, The Kimster, and sometimes Lolo, which is grandpa in Filipino heheh.
When was the last time you shaved your legs? Like 3 or 4 days ago.
Do you ever try free samples at the store? Nope.
Do you like boys with long hair? Physical traits don’t matter much to me.
Do you like rootbeer? I’ve never tried it but I don’t really want to either haha. It smells weird.
What is the best fast food place, in your opinion? KFC or Taco Bell. Or Jollibee.
Do you have faith in yourself? Starting to.
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I’m currently listening to like, old FNAF songs because nostalgia and they’re fuckin’ bops y’all don’t @ me.
Anyways, because of this, I new prompt/oneshot came to mind. The Batfam somehow end up being kidnapped and they enter a version (of the version) of the first (or whichever game) FNAF game.
Like, say that the creator of the game was a Robotics engineer who had hopes of creating a game. So, they create this horror game, and get hella into it, so much so they wrote books, created a sort of real life version of it (miniature tho) and etc etc. Then the Dev presents the game to another branch of the company they work at and it gets shut down. They get laughed at and everything being told that the game would never succeed and etc etc. And adding onto the Developer’s tragic backstory is that they got back stabbed and got their designs stolen by a coworker and got fired for whatever reason.
Anyways, the Developer not only got humiliated, got their work stolen but they even got fired from their dream job. Resentment breeds and then they cronstructe a real life version of the game(s) they created. They went so far as to stay as close to their games lore (in FNAF the animatronics were possessed by kids, same thing applies here). So, this Creator got jilted, back stabbed and humiliated and went a bit crazy and killed a couple kids who “possessed” the animatronics (the kids could actually possess the animatronics or not, up to y’all, but let’s say in this prompt/oneshot, that they did).
Anyways, let’s say Red Hood heard about five kids from Crime Alley that went missing in the exact same location at different dates. This catches his eye and he researches it some more. The more he researches the more he finds out. For one, more then ten kids went missing at this one location (which is this kids pizzeria party hall). Jason, whose known to protect kids, especially if they’re from Crime Alley or are street kids. But, he finds these series of suspected kidnappings/disappearance of these kids really particular. Something is off and he wants to investigate it.
Switch to Red Robin’s POV were he’s out on patrol and finds crates full of various mechanical/robotic parts. He’s, rightfully so, confused as all hell and tries to investigate were the fuck these robotic parts are being shipped and who shipped them. Unfortunately, he couldn’t find anything of substance as whoever ordered these hid their tracks very well. He takes a couple of the parts to analyze back at the Batcave/the Nest. He opens a couple more crates but finds other shit, like painting equipment, marble titles, plaster and other shit that is usually used when someone is renovating a place. They all have the same markings and the like and RR is confused but starts to suspect that one of the Rogues might be up to something. He also has a theory that this might be the work of a new, and upcoming Rogue as the stuff he found doesn’t fit any of their current Rogues MO but he doesn’t ignore the possibility this might be one of their other Rogues work.
Then we switch to Batman’s POV where he was working a different case but then notices something. He notices that someone is skimming money (a fuck load of money) off of this one companies branch and no ones noticed as its covered up pretty well (but Batman caught some minor, but significant inconsistencies). He tried to track the money transcations as he’s worried one of the Rogues might be planning something or something akin to that. The more he digs, the less he can find because everything leads back to shell companies and to stuff that doesn’t exist. The trail is covered up pretty well but this is Batman, he’s the worlds greatest Detective so he manages to find out that the money is being used to buy... paint, titles, chairs, and various other household renovating items? He’s a bit confused but then thinks that this might be Mad Hatter but when he looks into all the stuff that’s being bought, it doesn’t fit Mad Hatters Wonderland Aesthetic/MO. Still, he keeps on eye on the transactions.
Cut to Nightwing & Robin out in Blüdhaven. They’re out on biweekly patrol together. It’s a rather slow night but Robin and Nightwing are having fun (and bonding ofc!). Then, at one point, when the duo stop a mugging, the lady that they saved made an offhand comment about some kids going missing. Robin’s instinct goes off and he asks the woman whats she’s talking about. The woman explains that some street kids she knew from her job at a youth center just stopped coming. She chalks it’s up to her paranoia but she thinks they might have been nabbed. Nightwing cuts in and offers to walk the woman home which they do. Robin is thinking back on the woman’s comment about a few “missing” street kids. He tries to rationalize it as these kids probably just leaving or ending up in a Dention Center but he can’t help but think about it. He remembers something RH said about street kids going missing at this one specific place. He can’t stop thinking about throughout the rest of his and Nightwings patrol. Nightwing notices that Robin isn’t very focused so he asks what wrong. Robin dances around the topic but eventually does tell Nightwing what’s on his mind.
“That woman we saved earlier said something that stuck with me.”
Nightwing raises his eyebrow. “What did she say that stuck with you?” Nightwing knew that trusting ones gut instinct is important. There’s a reason why something’s that might send alarms off. He just hoped Damian could trust those instincts.
“She offhandedly remarked about missing kids. She told us that some kids she knew from the youth center she worked at haven’t showed up in three months. I remembered, earlier something that Red Hood said about streets kids going missing from a specific location, all at varying times.”
Nightwing is a bit surprised, but he’s heard Jason talk about the case. He makes a note to investigate the missing kids in here and compare notes with Jason afterwards. He has a feeling that the missing kids in ‘Haven might be related to the one in Gotham (considering street kids are the ones going missing. That stuck out to him). He reassures Robin that he’ll investigate it, and Robin replies that he wants in. Dick sighs but let’s him (it’s be a great bonding experience! No matter how morbid in retrospect...).
Batgirl (Stephanie!) is out on patrol with Red Robin when they talk about any recent activity they’ve seen. Red Robin makes an offhand comment about how he found crates filled with house renovating shit but he couldn’t trace them back to anyone. Batgirl stops, as she remembered when two weeks back she was at the Harbor and found crates filled with tech and... house renovating stuff. Batgirl then asks Red Robin for the serial number that the crates had, he’s but confused but tells her. Batgirl then realizes, those weird ass crates she found and she couldn’t trace back were the same one Red Robin were investigating. She tells him this, and tells him that she found were one of the crates were being hauled off to. They both decide to cut patrol short (it was almost finished either way, but tonight was uncharacteristically quiet). They both head off to Red Robin’s Nest. They both exchange info about the weird ass crates and theories. Batgirl thinks that this might be the work of a new up and coming Rogue as everything she found in the crates doesn’t suit any of their current Rogues MO. Tim agrees with her, but can’t find anyone that could be their new Rogue.
Now with everyone having different cases, which are all interlocked together let’s get into...
Five Nights At Genni’s
Ft. The Batfam, the Developer, FNAF Case Fic AU, fuck canon because everyone is on pretty good terms, Lots of Dead Kids (👀), And Scary Ass Probably Possessed Animatronics!
COMING SOON!
because I’m to lazy to continue on with the prompt/oneshot but I’ll finish it don’t worry lol
Now, if anyone wants to write a whole ass AU case fix stemming from this prompt/oneshot, go ahead! I’d honestly love to read the Batfam try and piece together the FNAF lore, while within the game itself, while trying to figure who tf is doing all this shit. It’s perfect for like, writing a great case fic, an exploration of the Batfam’s relationship and the Batfam themselves. But, it doesn’t have to be serious! Like, if y’all don’t want to write the part about several dead kids and want to write a semi crack fic centered around the Batfam being within the FNAF games then go for it!
Anyone who sees this, tag your fav Batfam writer! Because I haven’t found when fics where the Batfam ever interact with the FNAF games (whether them as actual games or something like what I wrote above). I’d love to see their takes on this prompt!
#batman#batman and robin#fanfic prompt#gotham#robin#fnaf#case fic#fnaf au#batfam#batgirl#nightwing#red robin#tim drake#stephenie brown#bruce wayne#dick grayson#damian wayne#red hood#jason todd#dead kids#ghost#robots#sorta crack
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Hold Me By Both Hands: Chapter 43
Disclaimer: I don’t own ML.
Enjoy this fluff because next chapter is when shit goes down :)
Chapter 42 | Chapter 44 | AO3 link
[7:02 pm] Luka <3
Adrien: so
Adrien: mari and kagami are on their date
Adrien: wanna chat?
Luka: that better not have been a pun
Adrien: :)
Adrien: no but srsly
Adrien: i’m gonna do it
Luka: ???
Adrien: i’m gonna come out
Adrien: and my dad can suck it
Luka: not sure whether i like being a reason for you to stick it to him
Adrien: nah you’re not
Adrien: more like a convenient excuse
Adrien: but like
Adrien: fuck if i gotta be the agreste poster boy then let me be out
Luka: for what it’s worth, i’m proud of you
Adrien: aww you know how to make a cat blush
Luka: you’re going to have so many people looking up to you
Luka: speaking from experience
Adrien: if i gotta be a role model then at least it’s for this
Luka: are you going to talk to marinette and kagami about it first?
Adrien: ofc
Adrien: just let them enjoy their date first lol
Adrien: wonder how they’re going
Luka: well, we haven’t seen any akumas yet, so i’m assuming it’s going well
Adrien: lmao
Adrien: so like uh
Adrien: wanna help me figure out wtf to say in the vid?
Luka: it’d be my pleasure
.
“Nathalie?” Adrien says at dinner two nights later. “Could I speak to Father for five minutes?”
“He’s very busy,” Nathalie says automatically. “If you have a message for him –”
“I know he’s too busy to see me most days. I wouldn’t ask if it wasn’t important.”
Nathalie raises an eyebrow. “Just how important can it be that you would disturb him?”
With a sigh, Adrien beckons her over, then unlocks his phone and taps into the video he’d sweated over all afternoon thanks to his last-minute Chinese cancellation. “I’m going to go ahead and say something no matter what,” he says. “But I want to make sure that it’s not going to “besmirch” the Agreste name or whatever Father says. I promised him I wouldn’t do that if I got to be with Marinette.”
After Adrien presses play, his face appears on the small phone screen, grinning rather nervously.
“Hey, everyone,” video Adrien says, scratching the back of his neck. “So, you’ve all been really great about my relationship with Marinette, and I couldn’t be more thankful. She’s just…amazing. The light of my life. But there’s something else that’s been going on behind the scenes, and I wanted to be honest and upfront with you guys. You all deserve that much.
“I’m just gonna come right out and say this first part. I’m…bi. Bisexual. As in, I don’t just like girls. It’s something I’ve been thinking about for months now, and my amazing princess has been my anchor while I’ve been figuring it out. She’s bi too, you know? And yes, she told me to say that, otherwise I wouldn’t breathe a word.
“A lot of people seem to think that being bi makes you, uh…promiscuous. That you want to jump every person you see. And that couldn’t be further from the truth. If a straight guy can be attracted to other girls and still choose his girlfriend, I can be attracted to other people and still be faithful to my Marinette. Attraction, not actions – and yes, I did come up with that, so feel free to use it.” Video Adrien shoots a finger-gun at the camera.
“But there’s another aspect of both me and Marinette that we’ve spent months wrestling over, and I like to think that us being so open about it with each other is what made our relationship so strong. We’re both polyamorous. We both love more than one person and want to be with that boy and girl, and we do plan on taking a group pic and being totally open about it with you guys to avoid any rumours, although we do ask that you respect our privacy and don’t bombard us with negativity or requests to “join” us.
“And I just wanna be clear: I’m not bi because I’m polyam, and I’m not polyam because I’m bi. You know, the whole promiscuous bi stereotype I mentioned before. Being polyam doesn’t mean I’m open to every single person who asks me out. It just means that having a relationship with multiple people who I’m attracted to feels…right. You know, how most people might be attracted to someone else but feel wrong if they choose to date that person as well as their partner. It’s the opposite for me and Marinette. We’ve both got so much love to give and we don’t feel right being constrained by this expectation that we can only date each other. There’s nothing wrong with monogamy or polyamory, and we’re just asking people to be respectful of us.
“So, um…yeah. That’s it. Thanks for listening, guys. And thanks for being respectful. I figured that if I could help just one person by coming out, this would be worth it, because I know I would’ve killed for someone to look up to and help me figure myself out. Uh, bye!”
The video ends with another finger-gun. Adrien swallows and tries not to shift in his seat as Nathalie regards him silently with her usual impassive face. It’s always impossible to read just what his father’s assistant is thinking, even after years of knowing her.
“I see no problem with the video,” Nathalie finally says. “But I’d refrain from posting it until I show your father and get his approval. Just send it to me and I’ll show him.”
“Right – thanks, Nathalie!”
Surprisingly, Adrien’s father must be in a good mood today, because Nathalie returns to summon Adrien as soon as he’s finished eating. There’s a knot in Adrien’s stomach as he knocks on the door of Gabriel’s atelier and pushes it open as soon as he’s instructed to do so, and he can only pray that he doesn’t throw up right in front of Gabriel, because that’s possibly the fastest way to shoot himself in the foot right now.
“So…” Adrien says. Gabriel holds a hand up, his cold grey eyes piercing Adrien’s very core, unsettling Adrien’s soul and leaving him to direct his willpower into not fidgeting with his ring.
“That was quite the interesting video that Nathalie showed me,” Gabriel finally says. Adrien swallows and wipes his sweaty palms on his jeans.
“Y-Yeah…”
“I can’t help but feel that it’s a little…greedy of you, Adrien. You have Miss Dupain-Cheng, after all.”
Adrien’s fingers twitch with the effort it takes to not clench them into fists. “I’m not greedy for liking more than one person, Father,” he says as evenly as he can manage.
“Well, if Miss Dupain-Cheng has this many…ah, shortcomings –”
“What? You think I want to be with Luka and Kagami as well to – to make up for Marinette’s flaws?” Now Adrien does clench his fists, and he’s pretty sure his set jaw is visibly rigid. “That’s not how polyamory works, Father. I’ve done my research! You think this is something I’d just jump into –”
“Watch your tone,” Gabriel says sharply. “Perhaps your girlfriend has been a negative influence after all. I may have to –”
“No,” Adrien hisses. Gabriel’s eyebrows fly to his hairline.
“No?” he repeats, as though it’s a word he’s never heard in his life. Adrien’s heart starts to race.
“I said no. You’re not taking Marinette away from me, Father. You’re not taking…the best thing that’s happened to me. And you’re not taking the others either. I didn’t come to ask for your permission. I came to compromise with you and let you approve of what I say in the video.”
“I’m not sure I like your attitude, young man. In fact, allowing you to attend school in the first place may have been my biggest error.”
Adrien can’t stop his jaw from dropping. What. The. Hell. Is Gabriel really that much of a control freak that he’d wish that Adrien had never found happiness just to maintain a modicum of control?
“You can withdraw me from school, but you can’t stop me from seeing my friends, Father,” Adrien snaps. His head’s spinning ever so slightly, and there’s a growl starting to rumble in his chest, and is he Adrien right now or Chat Noir? Adrien. He’s Adrien. Otherwise, Gabriel wouldn’t be looking at him like…that. “I’ll sneak out. I’ll always find a way to sneak out. I do fencing and Chinese and modelling to make you happy, because it’s a fair trade for letting me have a life with normal friends and normal school. But if you take away what makes me happy, I’ll take away any bit of control you have over me.”
“You are a child! You do whatever I say! I am your father!” Gabriel slams his palm on his desk. Adrien reflexively flinches, but then a tiny paw is digging into his ribs from inside his shirt, and it’s just grounding enough to stop him from babbling apologies and fleeing the room. He can do this. He can stand his ground. For Marinette and Luka and Kagami. For himself. All that’s necessary for the triumph of evil is that good people do nothing…even if he's about two seconds from falling to the floor unable to breathe in sheer panic.
“You’d really prefer that your own son has no happiness in his life just so you can keep controlling him like a puppet?” he says breathlessly. Gabriel visibly reacts, reeling back as though he’d been slapped, and he looks like he’s going to say something for a moment before looking down at his desk and shaking his head.
“Everything I’ve done has been for you, Adrien Agreste,” Gabriel says, his hand rising to clutch at his tie for a split second. His voice is so soft that it’s barely audible, so Adrien can’t quite make out whether there’s any danger in it. “All I’ve ever wanted is to keep you safe. To not lose you like I lost…”
Adrien’s shoulders slump. “You can’t shelter me forever, Father,” he says, forcing himself to imagine Marinette and Kagami and Luka’s voices alternating counting his breaths so that he doesn’t pass out. “I’ll be an adult in a few years and then I can leave, and I’ve still got no idea how to function like a normal person. Normal people don’t have my life. They’re not world-famous and modelling and studying Mandarin and fencing. And if you had your way…I’d never leave. I’d never have any idea how to leave. And I’d…I’d resent you for it.”
Gabriel is silent for such a long time that Adrien absently wonders if he’ll pass out anyway before his father speaks again, because the room is suddenly claustrophobic and hot and closing in on him, despite his controlled breathing.
“I see,” Gabriel eventually says. “If that’s how you really feel…”
Adrien braces himself for the inevitable crackdown for daring to speak his mind.
“…then I will allow you to also date this boy and girl,” Gabriel finishes. Adrien blinks, then blinks again to make sure that he’d heard right, because what? “So long as all of you behave properly and do not besmirch the Agreste name. The same conditions from when I allowed you to date Miss Dupain-Cheng still apply.”
“R-Really?” is all Adrien can say. Gabriel nods.
“I’ll also lessen your obligations on one weekday and one weekend day so that you may spend proper time with your partners,” he says. “In return, you will fully apply yourself to your studies and your extracurricular activities. You will not complain when I ask you to do something. You will let me know when you are going out and where you will be going. If your grades slip or your activities suffer, I will rescind my permission. Do I make myself clear?”
“Yes!” Adrien blurts out, not even caring that he’s effectively agreeing to sit down and do as he’s told, because this is the most freedom he’s ever been given by his father! “Yes – thank you, Father! Thank you so much!”
For a nanosecond, there’s a ghost of a smile on Gabriel’s face. But it’s gone so fast that Adrien’s left wondering if his brain is playing tricks on him.
“I must admit, I may have become a little…overprotective after I was akumatised,” Gabriel says. “But unfortunately, you are right. I can’t shelter you forever. Before you go, tell me the people in whom you and Miss Dupain-Cheng are both interested.”
“The girl is Kagami,” Adrien says. “Ms Tsurugi knows. Marinette met her the other day. And the boy…his name’s Luka. Luka Couffaine. He’s…amazing, Father. He’s just as amazing as Marinette and Kagami, but in a totally different way.”
“Hmm.” Gabriel pulls his tablet back towards him. “Goodnight, Adrien.”
“Goodnight, Father,” Adrien replies, recognising a clear dismissal when he sees one. Well, now it’s time to head back to his room, scream into his pillow for a good minute, throw said pillow at Plagg when the little shit makes fun of him, then call Marinette and Luka and Kagami to yell at them for good measure.
.
“I have prior obligations,” Kagami sighs over FaceTime while Adrien and Luka are waiting for Marinette to finish getting ready for their date. “And besides, I had a date with Marinette last night. It’s fair that you both have one without me.”
“Kagami, we’re a quad,” Adrien says. “Why would we have weird arbitrary rules like that? I know we agreed to have different dates but not like that.”
“Exactly,” says a voice from behind Adrien. When he turns and is greeted by the sight of Marinette in a floaty blue sundress with her hair in a loose bun, his brain immediately short-circuits and all he can do is make garbled sounds that in no way resemble words in any language on Earth. A quick glance next to him informs him that Luka is in very much the same state.
“Nice work, Marinette,” Kagami says with twitching lips. “You broke them.”
“Oh, just you wait,” Marinette grins. “Next time, I’ll break you too. Wait, don’t distract me when I’m scolding you! No one’s more important than anyone else in this, Kagami. I told you that the other night.”
“We’re all in this together,” Adrien sings while his brain reboots. Marinette and Luka groan.
“I don’t understand,” Kagami says.
“If you reference that again, you won’t get any cuddles for a week,” Marinette says.
“I’ll put on my kitten eyes,” Adrien shoots back.
“What, the ones that make you look like a constipated whale?” Plagg says from inside Marinette’s purse, where he’s taken to hanging out with Tikki whenever Marinette and Adrien are in the same place. That one makes Marinette, Luka, and Kagami burst out laughing, while Adrien scowls at Marinette’s purse and Tikki can be heard scolding Plagg.
“Thank you for helping to soothe my irrationality,” Kagami says once the laughter’s died down. “I appreciate all of you. But I wasn’t lying when I said that I had prior obligations. Mother wants to test my fencing skills, to see how I’m progressing.”
“Ew.” Marinette wrinkles her nose. “Have fun. We’ll think of you while we’re drinking ice cold lemonade.”
“Thanks,” Kagami deadpans. Then she looks over her shoulder. “I have to go. Enjoy your date and tell me everything about it tonight.”
“Bye, Kagami!” the other three chorus before Kagami’s face disappears from Adrien’s phone screen.
“C’mon, let’s hurry up and get to the park!” Adrien whines, jumping up and tugging on Luka’s arm. “Then I can get sandwiched between two pretty people on a picnic blanket!”
“Really?” Marinette says. “You’re going to make a bread pun?”
“Hey, when the opportunity rises.”
“And just who says you’ll be the one in the middle?” Luka teases. Butterflies erupt in Adrien’s stomach when Luka slings an arm around him, then reaches out to ensnare a pink-faced Marinette and draw her to his other side. “I’m the tallest.”
“But I’m a cat,” Adrien argues. “You’re supposed to use me as a pillow.”
“Oh my god,” Marinette mutters. Luka grins and then, rather than arguing back, he simply dips his head and captures Adrien’s mouth in a sweet little kiss, and Adrien’s brain promptly liquefies and starts to trickle out of his ears.
“You were saying?” Luka says.
“I – no – must – stay strong,” Adrien babbles.
“I’ll be in the freaking middle!” Marinette says. “I’m the girl and the team leader, so there!”
“Ah, but we’re partners, bugaboo,” Adrien manages to fire back.
“And I’m not even part of the team,” Luka adds with a smirk. Marinette rolls her eyes.
“I’ll lie across both of you and you can cuddle each other!” she says, throwing her hands into the air. “How’s that?”
Adrien and Luka exchange grins. “Fine with us,” they chorus. Marinette sighs.
“What did I get myself into?” she says.
#miraculous ladybug#ml fic#aotq fic#aotq: hold me#marinette dupain-cheng#adrien agreste#luka couffaine#kagami tsurugi#nathalie sancoeur#gabriel agreste#gabriel agreste's a+ parenting#lol fuck gabriel#ml polyamory#lukadrien#adrinette#adrienette#lukadrienette#lukadrigaminette
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Aside from Zombieman who are your favorites? Also what’s in Genus’s basement
OH BOI yeah this took a while to answer cause I actually had to compose my thoughts on the matter. It's a lot, long post ahead friendos
It would be easier and faster to list my LEAST favorites asdfghjkl but Hmmmm surprisingly, would you believe the reason I even started watching opm was because I saw Geryuganshoop and adored the weird simplistic alien squid design? He was actually my first fave lol oops??? Buuuut now, aside from Z, definitely Metal Bat, Genos, Child Emperor... And honestly Phoenixman? Also pretty darn high up there on the list is Tanktop Master, as well as Lightning Max, Oneshotter, Mizuki and Needlestar I love their Dynamic so much holy crap, and Atomic Samurai's disciples. The Egg himself goes without saying. Homeless Emperor and Vampire Pureblood also hold special places for me, which may or may not be obvious as to why... really though i just love everyone minus like, 3 or 4 characters who dont do much for me. but ANYWAY
What is in Dr. Genus's basement.
This question has been absolutely PLAGUING me since I read the chapter.
So to start, I'm going to go over something thats crossed my mind, but i don't think will (or want to) happen.
It is possible that it will be an actual device or method Genus has developed to remove a limiter. I don't want this. Mainly because we know it won't work, so it would likely end very badly for Z. But really, going off what we know of how such a thing might work, we have been shown that extreme stress (e.g. multiple near death experiences) result in major power-ups assuming the individual survives. So if there IS something in the basement meant to remove a limiter... well I'm praying its not some sort of torture device. And given Z's apparent subborness, immortality, and general nihilism, I don't think he would nope the fuck out of there if faced with such a thing, either. The fool would absolutely agree to some dumb thing like that. So. Please no. ONE I'm on my knees begging you not to do this. Please don't hurt him I'll die I swear
But as for my best guess... honestly, we don't really have much to go on here. At surface level, Genus appears to be telling the truth, and has disband the HoE and it's research. After witnessing Saitama' s impossible strength, the crushing realization that the culmination of his life's work and entire belief system was fundamentally flawed logically would have him give up the house of evolution and it's goals. HOWEVER, that isnt to say he gave up science and research altogether. Actually, I would find that REALLY hard to believe. Heck, even The anime emphasized the intensity of his passion for scientific advancements. Even if his current belief system upon which he founded the HoE was blatantly disproven, the passion and desire to learn and understand and discover doesn't just dissolve into thin air. I think it would be near impossible for someone who has dedicated their entire life to research to just... give up science altogether, at least in such an abrupt manner.
Remember this cool thing season 1 did that showed up 3 times and never again?
So why wouldn't he just switch gears? Saitama has essentially solved the same problem Genus was trying to tackle, only through a completely different method. What reason would Genus have to NOT begin researching the Nature of Saitama's power? And actually, the fact that Genus was even able to explain as much as he did about the 'limiter' to Zombieman during their reunion suggests he did just that. He at the very least looked into the subject enough to coin the term 'limiter' and create a theory about how every being has one, etc.
At the same time, when Zombieman confronted him about the House of Evolution, axe raised and ready for execution, Genus didn't seem particularly worried. Rather, he admitted he didn't have much left to live for. So I think, though he may have started research into the 'limiter' and its removal, I think he was unable to make any sort of headway on emulating Saitama and has since given it up. Or at the very least, if it IS ongoing, he honestly doesn't see any sort of success on the horizon. If he truly thought he could replicate Saitama's power, with or without its prices, I don't think he would have accepted death so quickly? I think his passion would have been reignited, and he would be doing SOMETHING with his findings. He wasn't the type to just... die with unfinished business. Quite the opposite actually, remember he was willing to die in order to see his research through to the end at the hands of Carnage Kabuto.
So, I'm lead to believe that there is SOMETHING pertaining to research on limiters in the basement. Maybe failed experiments, maybe calculations upon calculations with impossible solutions. I'm thinking Genus is going to show Zombieman why 'removing his limiter' isn't just a simple task that can be done at the drop of a hat. I think this will largely be a way for us the audience to recieve some more insight on how the limiter theory works. That said, I'm not certain where that will leave Zombieman. So long story short, I'm still quite worried for Z, and don't know where his story is going.
#option 3 infinite octopus tentacle dungeon#👀#ahahaha i regret nothing (by that i mean everything)#zombieman#dr. genus#opmiss mumbling#theory#i gues??#also mad spoilers#web comic#web comic spoilers#spoilers#one punch man#opm#ask#gottahaveguts#thanks dude i totally went off whoops#this was a good one#sorry i cant to a read more on mobile asdfghjkl
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Looking ahead at another year of study.
So, yet another year of university, but at least now I’m on the steady and straight road with my geology major, and there’s a whole lot of classes I want to take, one or two which may be changed (or dropped all together). Right now, the summer’s still hot and my geology-related internship is still running (although it’s not going great at the moment this week as I’ve been “glomped” by sudden extreme fatigue out of nowhere, which meant I had to try and parcel my energy carefully, which sucks ass. :( And right before an intense geology field school thing next month. Body, can you please not screw up my study plans for once? Kthxbye.)
That aside, in prep for taking geochemistry later this year (semester 2, which will be in July during mid-winter), I decided to go all in and do a self-paced distance course through the university to get myself re-acquainted with high-school (final year equivalent) chemistry--had a price to pay, but I find I tend to be way more likely to finish an introductory thing if there’s a significant price tag on it. I thought, thanks to past experience, I’d probably struggle and hate every step of the way, but I’m finding that I’m actually enjoying re-learning (or learning again) about the basics of chemistry. If my relationship to chemistry (so to speak) was a fic with associated tags, one of them would definitely be “enemies to friends” (not lovers. Sorry, it’s platonic, not romantic chemistry, here.)
Anyway, let’s look ahead to the year ahead for my Geology major.
@luna-and-mars @astudyinchocolate @rose-of-the-underworld @dand3l1on-fluff
SEMESTER 1:
Minerals and Rocks (Core paper)
Oooh boy, I’ve heard all sorts of things about this paper, ranging from “Hardest paper ever” to “Fuck this paper and my life”, but seeing that other geol majors fought through nevertheless, especially the crystallography and petrology, then I feel like I can fight it too. I’ve fought worse papers, so bring it on.
Field Studies and New Zealand Geology (Core paper)
Oh boy, the prospect of having to sleep in the same cabin/dorm/whatever as other strangers who don’t even know me is making my social anxiety shoot through the roof just thinking about it. And it doesn’t help that the last time I had to share a dorm with someone (at a backpackers), they complained about me to the receptionist (who took their side, effectively) about me making “so much noise at 4am” and they couldn’t bear to sleep another night in the same room as a “handicapped” person” and were so uncomfortable sharing the same space as someone with a hearing impairment (I wear hearing aids). Part of me wants to feel bitter about that, but you know what? Fuck that noise. It’s not my problem if someone feels uncomfortable with people who happen to have a disability or whatever. So, as Chloe Price would so eloquently say, with her fingers alone:
On the upside, the prospect of going out on an adventure and seeing geology in the real world so to speak, and being able to take alll the photographs and writing down all the things I discovered and everything from day to day? Sounds AWESOME. Sign me up.
Geomorphology:
This sounds quite similar to a class I took last year on sedimentology, only this is looking at the more geographical aspect of things--i.e. what you can see on the surface of the planet (whether that be Earth, which I still live on, or Mars, or wherever) and what that tells us about the history of the landscape and also how it came to be that way. So hopefully it’ll be more interesting than the frankly boring-sounding summary. Also, taking it at final year in undergraduate level means I can also do a research project, which would be awesome.
And of course, it can be related to elsewhere in the solar system, notably Mars:
Introduction to Remote Sensing Technologies:
Again, taking this because of its relatability to many different fields, notably including astronomy (I think you can start to see a pattern here: taking classes that can be related in some way to astronomy as well.) It includes stuff like learning about how light interacts with objects (e.g. vegetation, water...), photogrammetry (basically making measurements from photos), and so on. This definitely looks like it would be really useful, and is kind of like an offshoot in a way of my favourite hobby: photography. So hey, in a way, I can learn a little photography!
Also, I’ve always been fascinated by how photographing, say, galaxies in different wavelengths of light really brings out different aspects of their nature, and it’s just cool. Go Hubble Space Telescope.
SEMESTER 2
Geophysics:
Say it with me, fellow human beings, what is the one thing I can relate this thing to as well? Yep, astronomy. This is more aimed at seismology and radar imaging and whatever, but since at least one of the postgraduate (or independent project in final undergrad year next year) projects I’m interested in involves geophysical aspects to a great degree, this will be super-useful for that as well. Let’s give the Earth’s heart a listen, using geophysics.
(Incidentally, the Mars Insight Lander on Mars is using geophysical tools to listen for Marsquakes.)
Geochemistry:
Hopefully, this’ll be really interesting, even if challenging--I am definitely looking forward to learning more about things like isotopes and how it relates to geology. And once again, yep, can be extended beyond our planet too. If I want to have a significantly improved chance of getting a job related to my geology major in the future, this bad boy’s definitely the one to have on my team, so to speak.
And, honestly? If it wasn’t for chemistry, the universe wouldn’t even exist. So give it up for chemistry--it’s here to stay, so may as well learn to enjoy it and have fun while I can. There’s gotta be some chemistry, no matter what. If this was a song, it would be “Something There” from Beauty and the Beast, particularly Belle’s lines.
Marine Geology:
This sounds amazing, and I am definitely looking forward to this, as it brings together geology and oceanography in a way that just makes everything I’ll probably learn in this class fantastic. I think this is another paper I’m definitely genuinely excited about, and what’s even cooler is that it also gives you a taste of science communication and also research out in the field, at Stewart Island (which I’ve been to years ago (six years ago), and fell in love, so it’d be awesome to see it again.)
Science and the Public
This one, I’m cautiously curious about, but the atmosphere of that department is...let’s just say, so pretentious and elite and that kind of White People (TM) nonsense. However, they promise to teach you about how to make science accessible and welcome to the public via things like science outreach, engagements with the community, and exhibitions. Those I’m looking forward to, so I’m hoping they will more than make up for any possible toxicity in the atmosphere, and I will still learn something nonetheless.
Otherwise, the class on volcanoes (that’s on the same exact day and time, so much for being able to be in two places at once or having a time turner or rewind powers) will take its place instead. Volcanoes sounds way more fun than a class that could be good, but the science communication department is...not so friendly--especially to diverse people--they literally take on mostly white, able-bodied (and able-eared in my case lol) students which stinks. They had fifty spots for their introduction to science communication paper (which is the 2nd year class, which I took last year) and yet only took on 16 white, young, able students. Like...what the schist? Come on.))
So gonna keep my eye on this one, but definitely very cautiously hopeful for this thing.
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1) IT’S OKAY TO FAIL
I’m not sure how other 34 year olds feel when their 35th birthday is coming up. As for me, I felt like my failures grew more apparent. Celebrate what you HAVE accomplished and be grateful for another day.
2) CRAVE TO BE A BEGINNER AGAIN
I’ve been wanting to try something new for a good minute. Like point number one, it’s okay to fail at something! This goes hand in hand with being a beginner. I strongly believe in being a student of life. I always wanted to learn a new language.
3) LOVE YOUR PARENTS
We are often so busy growing up, we often forget they are also growing old! If you needed a reminder to call your parents, this is it. Do it now! My mom is my world. She was my worst enemy as a teenager but now my best friend as an adult <3
4) MOVE AT YOUR OWN PACE
Fuck what everyone is doing on Instagram. Fuck what your high school friends are doing. Fuck what your college friends are doing. Live your life at your own pace. If you had kids or want kids before marriage, fuck it. If you chose your career before a man, FUCK IT. You will move at the pace that is meant for YOU.
5) SO LIVE THE LIFE AND TAKE EVERY CHANCE TO BE AS HAPPY AS YOU CAN BE..
Being true to yourself takes guts. First, you’ve got to face everything around you and figure out what is important; what you think really counts ;). second, you’ve got to interact with a lot of people who may see things differently.
6) RELATIONSHIPS
No relationship is perfect, ever. There are always some ways you have to bend, to compromise, to give something up in order to gain something greater... The love we have for each other is bigger than these small differences. and that’s the key. it’s like a big pie chart, and the love in a relationship has to be the biggest piece. Love can make up for a lot.
7) SOULMATE
A true soul mate is probably the most important person you’ll ever meet, because they tear down your walls and smack you awake. But to live with a soul mate forever? Nah.. too painful. soul mates, they come into your life just to reveal another layer of yourself to you, and then Leave.
8) 30S ARE BETTER THAN YOUR 20S
It’s the same! Except we’re still young enough to have fun without making dumb decisions. We’re also more mindful financially! We always have experienced and seen things and know what not to repeat. I feel a little more at ease at 30. I’m caring less about what other people think. I really don’t have energy for it anymore!
9) WEAR THE FUCKING SUNSCREEN
My mom always told me to wear sunscreen on my face. I never listened. I have a lot of sunspots on my face now! Wearing sunscreen helps protect you from skin cancer, wrinkles and sunspots/freckles. If you aren’t listening to ya mama, listen to me! lol I wear Glossier’s Invisible Shield, but they’ve been sold out for a good minute. So, I’m currently using Super Goop’s Sunscreen Moisturizer. So far, it hasn’t made me break out!
10) TAKE OFF YOUR MAKE UP BEFORE BED
At the very least, keep some make up removal wipes beside your bed! I know we’re tired af at the end of the night, but you’ll be doing your skin a huge favor in the long run. Just know that make up wipes don’t take off everything, you’d be surprised how much is still on your face! So always try to go further and do your skin care routine.
11) LIFE
This Life is what you make it. no matter what, you’re going to mess up sometimes. it’s a universal truth. But the good part is you get to decide how you’re going to mess it up. Girl’s will be your Friends - they’ll act like it anyways. but just remember, some come, some go. the ones that stay with you through everything- they’re your true best friends. don’t let go of them. As for Lovers, well, they’ll come and go too. And i hate to say it, most of them - actually pretty much all of them are going to break your heart, but you can’t give up because if yoi give up, you’ll never find your soulmate, you’ll never find that half who makes you whole and that goes for everything. just because you fail once, doesn’t mean you’re gonna fail at everything. keep trying, hold on, and always, always, always believe in yourself, because if you don’t, then who will? so keep your head high, keep your chin up, and most importantly, keep smiling, because life’s a beautiful thing and there’s so much to smile about.
12) GIVE YOURSELF CREDIT
Everyone on social media posts their highlight reels but only a few share the grit and grind behind it all. Don’t forget to give yourself credit even for the smallest things that you don’t think is “post worthy”. Pat yourself on the back!
13) BE MORE SELF AWARE OF HOW YOU REACT TO OTHERS
I strongly believe in the butterfly effect. How you treat others can leave a positive or negative effect on them. I always try my best to be kind to others. If I can’t be kind, I’m very quiet! Even if people are mean to me, I think deeper like are they having a bad day? Maybe my kind act can help them change their mood.
14) BE NICE AND EXPECT NOTHING IN RETURN
Best recipe to live by. So many people offer a lending hand but expect so much in return.
15) DON’T FORCE THINGS – LET IT FLOW ORGANICALLY
Someone who forces shit to happen is ignorant & aggressive. You can’t force relationships or friendships to work out. It doesn’t work that way if it’s ONE SIDED. Sometimes, TIME helps a situation out. Let it play out, what’s destined to be yours will be yours!!! All relationships should be bloomed organically. Always try to understand one another. Some people don’t move like you and that’s okay.
16) YOU DON’T TOLERATE PEOPLE OR SITUATIONS LIKE YOU USED TO
Enough said. Ain’t no body got time for that.
17) IT’S NORMAL TO SEE A THERAPIST
You don’t have to be “crazy” to see a therapist. I did and it was life changing. There’s a huge stigma with mental health, but it’s actually more common than people think. People struggle with it daily but hide it because of the stigma. I also found out that students who are trying to become a therapist offer free or very affordable services to those who don’t have insurance! Check out any college and I’m sure you’ll find something fitting!
18) MEDITATE.. DO THAT SHIT PLS
Practice your breathing too! Headspace is really helpful app that concentrates on various subjects: anxiety, depression, stress, etc. I don’t meditate long! It can be as little as 3 minutes. Taking a moment to find yourself again can help you in the long run.
19) NOW’S THE TIME TO SEE THE WORLD
BITCH, you better be planning to travel!!!!! I can’t emphasize this enough. If you’re a woman reading this, we MUST DO IT NOW. Before you have kids, just do yourself this favor. You won’t regret it. Seeing parts of the world has broaden my perspective immensely!
20) MARI KONDO THE SHIT OUT OF YOUR LIFE: CLOTHES, BOOKS…PEOPLE
I’m at this point in my life where I’m looking at everything and everyONE and ask myself, does this spark joy?! It’s completely necessary for you to start fresh and say thank you to things and people who no longer serve a purpose in your life.
21) IF YOU DON’T HEAL WHAT HURT YOU, YOU WILL BLEED ON PEOPLE WHO DIDN’T CUT YOU (@THEASLAYWAY)
You can’t rely on someone else to fill the void you were supposed to heal yourself first. Don’t be selfish and make sure that you are completed healed when moving on to the next partner!
22) DO WHAT YOU WANT, POST WHAT YOU WANT, LIVE HOW YOU WANT!!!!
WE AINT GIVIN A FUCK IN 2019 & MOVING FORWARD. Go ahead and post what you want. We’re not living for the validation of others.
23) DON’T LIVE SOMEONE ELSE’S DREAM
Currently trying to get through this right now. lol
24) MENTAL HEALTH IS JUST AS IMPORTANT AS YOUR PHYSICAL HEALTH
This goes with 17 & 18. If I sound like I’m repeating myself, then it’s because I really am adamant about it! I didn’t always have GAD, but when I realized I had it, I learned to take the necessary steps to control my anxiety. I realized working out in the gym is not the only “exercising” I should be doing. I should be practicing affirmation, gratitude & meditation.
25) BE CAREFUL WHO YOU GET CLOSE TO
Some people really just in it for the gossip. Keep your circle tight and you’ll be aiite. For me, being in the social media industry has led me to meet several people. It’s rare to meet someone genuine, so I always make sure I keep my distance but still always show respect and give them an opportunity to open up.
26) OTHER PEOPLE MAY BE TOXIC IN YOUR LIFE, BUT MAKE SURE YOU’RE NOT THE TOXIC ONE
As you get older, accountability will help you grow. Owning up to your actions towards others can help you realize how you react towards others or situations. Before pointing fingers, make sure your hands are clean. I’m a strong believer of what you give this world is gonna come back to you.
27) PLEASE DON’T WORK OUT ON ONLY BOOTY AND ABS
I remember signing up for the gym and telling the membership counselor my goal was to grow a bigger butt and get abs. I’ve learned that your body works as a whole unit, not in isolation! Overall strength over aesthetic is the wave! I love being strong <3
28) RESEARCH HOW YOU CAN IDENTIFY PERSONALITY DISORDERS
You’ll come across people in your life that you can’t see eye to eye with. It could be family, your partner or your friends. I think it’s important to grasp a better understanding of personality traits/disorders such as narcissism, bipolar, emotional abusers, psychopaths, etc. They come or are in your life more often than you think! Not only do I suggest to gain insight on it, but also I recommend researching how to DEAL with it. I promise you things will come to light once you do.
29) LOVE YOURSELF – YOU CAN’T SERVE FROM AN EMPTY VESSEL
Your 20s are your selfish years. Remember to put yourself FIRST. We cannot love someone successfully without loving ourselves first. Our first love should be ourselves to know how WE want to be loved. We must feel secure before stepping into anything serious. Live life for yourself, be gracious and love yourself wholeheartedly.
30) BEFORE YOU ARGUE
Before you argue with someone, ask yourself, is that person even mentally mature enough to grasp the concept of different perspectives? Because if not, there’s absolutely no point.
31) NEVER TAKE RESPONSIBILITY
never take responsibility for ppl not seing your worth. There was nothing u could have changed them. No perfection would have made them loyal. No sacrifice would have them made committed. Stop taking blame for decisions that aren't yours
32) Success is never owned.. it’s rented, and the rent is due everyday. -pacman
33) SOMETIMES
I care too much, I trust too much, I think too much, I love too much, everything about me is just too much. But even so I wouldn’t want to change that about me. Just holding onto the hope that one day my “too much” will be everything someone could ever want.
34) FROM GOOD THINGS TO BAD THINGS
From good things, we learn to be a thankful person. From bad things, we learn to be a strong person. Remember that everything will not go the way you want it to. It's a matter of learning that life isn't handed to you. Stop worrying about what others want. Think about what you want, if you listen too much to what people say about you, you will never be who you really are.
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Hey, so ppl who have followed me awhile, you know how occasionally I toss out random concepts as like, just general prompts because they were a thing that happened in my brain and I thought they were a cool idea but have no time/plans to write them ever so I’m always like....dude, run with it if it sparks something for you?
So due to my physiological incompatibility with Being Subtle Ever and my many many rants on how much it annoys me when people who openly state they’re not a survivor themselves then go on to share writing that clearly views Law & Order SVU as viable Research Material like....its not exactly a shocker that I’m a big believer in the idea that there are just some stories that some people aren’t meant to write. Like full stay in your lane premises, stories where it doesn’t matter how thoroughly or sincerely you research experiences outside your own - its just not your story to write.
And occasionally I also definitely come up with novel ideas that fall in this category. Some even make it all the way to extensively plotted/worldbuilt stages of outlining before I clue in that the basic premise is just unworkable for ME, due to my specific axes of identity....like sometimes I just really love an idea and so try and workshop it and come at it from a different angle that is more approachable for me....but ultimately, there have been a number of times when I’ve just had to put aside even a really in depth world or idea because it was just too innately connected in my head to various lived experiences or cultural identities that I don’t feel comfortable writing towards.
Like for example, years ago I plotted out this one YA novel idea that’s like....historical sci-fi, ‘alienpunk’ - like the basic idea was what if a First Contact scenario with aliens coming to Earth happened, but in the 19th century, like late 1800s. Steampunk style aesthetics, but instead of it being ahead-of-its-time steam powered technology, it was the anachronistic results of combining advanced alien technology with early or mid-Industrial Age science.
The thing was, despite trying out various different eras or locations, the story that kept coming out in outline was pretty firmly centered in America in the late 1800s, and like, it would be a huge glaring omission for ME to write that story and not have any black characters or acknowledge the social aspects of it being set during a post-Civil War era, and like...that’s not really For Me to write IMO.....and so as much as I loved the general idea, I felt pretty strongly that as it was, it just wasn’t a story I needed to write, when I have plenty more that are much more based out of my own lanes.
And to be clear, the story isn’t ABOUT slavery, that was never the issue, its not thematically built around related concepts, nothing like that. Its a sci-fi ‘aliens came to Earth and shit inevitably happened both because Aliens and also because People’ adventure....that is also historical fiction, with the era in question being post-Civil War America. Its just a story SET during that time, because that was the way it unfolded for me and I couldn’t get it to click creatively any other way. But still, its just disingenuous to pretend that any story set during that era doesn’t have a ton of room for expansion or commentary or bringing in more themes - with me just not being the right author to do that. Not my place, it just is what it is, and I’m wholly fine with that.
Anyway, my point with all this is I have a pretty sizable number of basic premises and even full outlines along those ‘nope, this isn’t actually for me after all’ lines that I’ve set aside over the years because like....my brain literally never shuts off and I write a fucking lot lot lot. And I do think a lot of them are pretty good ideas that someone could make some really fun stories out of, because I’m biased and occasionally do manage to love myself, like yeah, I do write good shit if I say so myself. But given that I’m not that person to write those particular stories, like I’d love to offer them up to other writers who might be interested in doing something with them.
And again just to be total clear - I am very much an ‘any time I say do whatever the fuck you want with this, I really mean it’ kinda guy. These would come with zero strings or expectations. If you like one of these ideas and want the outline or notes I made for it, its yours to do whatever the fuck you want with. Stick to the outline, don’t stick to it, just run with the basic premise, use the notes as a springboard to launch your own creativity into entirely new directions that didn’t even occur to me - sky’s the limit, have at it, I wouldn’t ask for or expect any compensation or official credit or royalties or whatever the fuck, not the point of this. Literally my only request would be like, hey, if you finish something off of one of these and do something with it, maybe gimme a shout out in the acknowledgments section and drop me a copy when you’re done because literally every story idea I’ve ever had, I’ve had it because at the end of the day its a story I want to read so....I’d definitely want to read whatever you come up with lol, but its YOUR story at that point. No hidden strings or whatever, you can cite this post as your official proof of that if needed I guess? Idk, its all pretty bullshit to me. God, I’m a publisher’s worst nightmare.
But I mean, the entire reason I didn’t ever write any of these specific stories and don’t think I ever will is because I quite literally don’t think I’m the right person to write them which means I quite literally believe there’s a metric fuck ton of people who could write them better than me and do things with them I never could and would never even occur to me, so like...lmfao, please don’t worry that I’m gonna be sitting here ever thinking like ugh how dare they not stick to my outline and notes and think they knew how to write this idea better than me. Like, you can. I want you to. That’s the whole point.
So yeah, basically the endpoint of all this rambling is if any writers out there would be interested in this kinda thing, drop me a reply or a reblog or even just an ask with what you think is a good way to handle that.
Like, I was thinking just whenever I’m thinking about one of them I’d maybe make a post (maybe tagged with a specific tag I use as a catch-all for any one of these ‘up for grabs’ outlines) about the general idea or a couple of the characters I came up with and a list of the kind of materials I wrote out for that story and their extent, like does that one have a full outline, is it more just worldbuilding and character notes, etc. And if someone’s interested or is like “oh I read this and it totally gave me all these ideas for what to do with a story like that” or whatever, just hit me up and first come first serve, the full file is yours.
But like, that’s just my ‘puts the lazy in laissez-faire,’ pulled it out of my ass two seconds ago idea for how to approach this, so if anyone has a better or more coherent idea, or even just a thought for what to tag this kinda thing, I’m all ears.
(Just final additional disclaimers: I’m super duper aggressively not interested in being like ‘mmmm, lemme judge your writing first and pick whomever I think is the Most Qualified To Write Mine Idea Properly’ like eww, gross, and similarly I have no desire to ask for identity credentials. Like if you’re a white writer and you read all of this and hit me up about a story I say I decided not to write because its heavily influenced by Mesoamerican cultures to a degree that I was like, I personally don’t feel anyone but a Latinx writer needs to be profiting off this story - I mean, you could definitely be like ‘oh I’m Latinx’ y’know, like a liar, and I’d be like okay sure, and if it ends up published later and I’m like hey I recognize that story and hey that author is as white as me, like.....you could do that I guess, and that’s a thing that could happen and like....that’s between you and your own choices and reasoning at that point and if you’re comfortable with that I mean, you do you, just be aware I probably think you’re an asshole then. C’est la vie. The world will keep turning.)
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Weird Detective Conan Crossovers
For some strange reason I’ve been thinking of odd ways didn’t franchises and works can be combined with Detective Conan. I don’t know why maybe the fact that Detective Conan is largely down to earth and realistic paradoxically makes it ripe for crossovers no matter how odd or silly.
Of course some franchises mix better then others. I am still completely baffled and actually a little angry that there are very little if any crossovers with Death Note and Tokyo Ghoul! (Seriously there are crossovers with Ed Edd N Eddy and fucking AQUA TEEN HUNGER FORCE of all things but the two series that fit it’s overall realism and formula perfectly get ignored? What a gip!)
But then there are other series that I’ve thought of that are… Well weird. But not for the reasons I said. What’s makes them so strange is that they somehow WORK.
I guess I was inspired to make this list because MintChocolateLeaves does similar list of writing prompts. Anyway, get it on!
Condemned: For those not in the know, Condemned is a awesome horror game that revolves around a malevolent force spreading insanity and increasing crime in the a city called Metro. You play a forensic examiner who gets accidentally gets framed by “Serial Killer X” a Serial Killer who kills other Serial Killers the exact way they kill their victims. Imagine if the original Team Silent Games met Se7en, So basically what I am imagining is that Shinichi is wanted in a series of serial murders by a wannabe teen detective who becomes Serial Killer X. After talking to his uncle you go on the search for him in a series of gentrified neighborhoods with the aid of Ran, Heiji and others. However it soon becomes clear that his sanity is beginning to slip as various creatures go on the hunt for him as well. The presence also physically turns him into a adult when he is in close proximity and as the abyss absorbs him, he may end up becoming the thing he hates the most.
Hitman: This doesn’t require much explanation. Basically Hitman 47 goes to Japan to, well, do his thing and Conan sees him, making him a target. Upon research he learns the extent of Hitman 47′s crimes but he unfortunately cannot focus on bringing him to justice as the Black Organization is after 47 as well for unknown purposes that Ai may or may not know about.
Heavy Rain: Let’s face it; David Cage games suck ass. However I have a very special place in my heart for Heavy Rain, both because of the fact that Madison Paige is fucking hot and the fact that despite its really obvious flaws, I feel that there is a significant charm to it. So, Conan is kidnapped by the Origami Killer, and Conan being Conan this is not easy for said serial killer. However he still succeeds and this is where I have the characters replaced. Kogoro is obviously Ethan, so the story shows off how much he really loves Conan in truth. Ran or Eri might take the place of Madison Paige, both being really apt for the role and I’m certain there is a ton of character development and emotional/dark situations you can get the both of them in without being weirdly pervy. Hell maybe they end up both going after Kogoro but separate and the major theme of the story is all four reuniting The Host style. Sato can fit the mold of Norman since her temperament is really similar to him and you can show her struggle not to go in a downward spiral as she gets obsessed with the case with Takagi providing emotional support as Megure starts to come to terms with the fact that his best friend might be a serial killer. As for Scott Shelby I am honestly not sure which Detective Conan could take his place without that stupid twist involving his character being even more stupid. In fact, I realize that much of the melodrama and plotholes would almost certainly have to removed because it could really hurt the story. Certainly more effort then I am willing to try and attempt so go ahead!
Dexter: Dexter goes to Japan instead of Brazil. He’s beem there for two years. One day he meets the Mouri’s and ends up killing again. Conan tries to stop him with mixed results. And hilarity ensues.
Sleeping Dogs: Ran wins a vacation to Hong Kong so she, Sonoko, and the rest of the Mouri’s go there and ran afoul of the Sun On Yee Triad. Meanwhile the FBI investigates a link between the murder of a Japanese businessman and the BO so Wei Chen is forced to get involved uncovering something really odd. Plus if you want to be masochist or glutton for punishment you can include the Anti-ELAB movement. Why? Cause that’s what I would do and I’m fucking insane! No seriously, don’t whitewash the protests, maybe the death of that same business man start it off.
Yakuza: Why not? I mean I have zilch for ideas lol but you can almost certain find some. I particularly like the insanity of Conan meeting Majima or Kiryu suplexing Gin into a garbage can.
And... That’s about it. Wow these ideas suddenly make sense now that I’ve slept! Welcome officially to my crazy world.
#detective conan#ran mouri#conan edogawa#video games#heavy rain#yakuza#nocturnal admission#condemned#serial killer#insanity#somehow not on drugs#first post#mouri kogoro#mouri ran#triad#fbi#dexter#china gonna hate me#my debut#eri kisaki#kisaki eri#search#investigations#looking for work#looking for friends#tokyojapan#copycat#ai haibara#haibaraai#black organization
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A LONG ASS LIST OF TIPS FOR HIGH SCHOOL: FRESHMAN TO SENIOR YEAR LETS GO
Disclaimer: This is just from my experience, so these might not all apply to you!
Freshman Year
ok, ok, freshman year can be scary but don’t let that get to you
dont worry about upperclassmen being rude/teasing you
it’ll most likely happen, but I’ve never seen an upperclassman tease a freshman with the intention to really hurt them
one day you’ll be them so dw
on the topic of upperclassmen, make some older friends!!! (through classes, sports, etc.) it’s so nice to have someone give you tips and help you through high school
dont expect your friend group to stay the same lol
BUT ITS A GOOD THING I PROMISE YOU
I was scared of changing my friend group, so even though I wasn’t being treated too well, it wasn’t until senior year when I really made a change and I wish I did it earlier
be open to meeting new people, everyone is scared just like you and looking for more friends
I don’t think its neccessary for freshman to become sUPER involved in clubs and all that but at least get a feel for whats out there
try out for a sport if you play one!
this goes for all of high school, not just freshman year, but I regret not being as involved as I could’ve been
Go to school events like football games and dances! School spirit is considered weird in middle school but its cool in high school
take your classes seriously, your teachers are right - high school is much harder than middle school (but it’s not too bad if you stay organized!)
my freshman year GPA was my lowest like english really caught me off guard (properly formatted, 5 paragraph essays being 50% of your grade??? a concept.)
so my cumulative GPA was brought down
I think most freshman don’t have access to AP classes to boost your GPA or anything, but if you’re looking to push yourself take an honors class or 2! (if available)
Sophomore Year
wooohooo ur no longer a freshman
I’d take at least 1 AP class if you can
my sophomore year I took AP Human Geo - which I really loved, and it also wasn’t too hard
a lot of sophomores take AP World which is a BITCH of a class
BUT I wouldn’t recommend taking Honors World because you don’t get the GPA boost, you don’t get college credits (unless you take the AP Euro test or something), and it’s almost just as hard
this is a bit random - but when you’re taking Algebra 2 (which was my sophomore year) PLS PAY ATTENTION math builds on itself don’t fuck yourself over
take the PSAT if you want (I honestly don’t remember if I took it freshman year too but eh), but seriously its not required
start thinking about college (I know it’s the last thing you want to do)
just little things like
when do I want to take the SAT/ACT?
would I like a small school or a big school?
What will I be able to put on my college applications?
like if you do community service through a club/church/etc then great!!! sports? YEs
can’t think of anything? Join a club! Try out for a sport (it’s not too late) Find something that interests you
you’re probably pretty situated socially now but never be afraid to get to know those classmates/”school friends” better!
Junior Year
so junior year is commonly thought of as the hardest year of highschool
which is partially true (we’ll get there later)
but anyways, seriously buckle your seatbelt and get ready to work your ass off because THIS YEAR COUNTS, LADIES AND GENTS
Take AP classes if available
I took AP Psych (WOULD HIGHLY RECOMMEND) and Honors PreCalc (coming from regular Algebra 2)
Psych gave me college credit and a GPA boost
HPC gave me a GPA boost for UCs
It was a bitCH of a class but it made AP calc a breeze
If you haven’t started already, start prepping for SAT/ACT and then take them
tutoring is very helpful, but it can be expensive
I’ve seen studyblrs post about free prep through Kahn Academy and other stuff, so you might have to do a bit of digging but there are tons of resources out there
TAKE PRACTICE TESTS
take one of each first - then focus on the test you did better on
one of my biggest regrets is taking SAT prep instead of ACT prep because my ACT (which I didn’t do specialized prep for) ended up equivalent to my SAT (which I did prep for)
the more you take em the better you get
Studyblr is gr8 for finding test taking tips
If you’re not happy with your score, just take it again! I only took each one once but most people improve their scores if they take it again
I recommend visiting a few universities when you’re on break! Get a feel for what you like and what you don’t like (size, location, public/private, etc) and what kind of school you could get accepted to
you don’t want to end up applying to a billion schools that you wouldn’t even want to go to
private schools like it when you express interest by visiting
so if you’re visiting, make sure you check in so you can be in their system
END OF JUNIOR YEAR - ASK FOR LETTERS OF REC NOW! BY THE FIRST WEEK OF SENIOR YEAR A LOT OF TEACHERS ARE ALREADY TAKING ON TOO MANY LETTERS!
Senior Year (buckle up this section is the longest)
but YAY UR A SENIOR
DO FUN SENIOR YEAR THINGS like my school has all kinds of events for seniors and it’s so great
Remember when I said junior year is the hardest? Yeah well no... 1st semester senior year is SO MUCH WORSE ur in for a lot of fun
Ok seriously - don’t let senioritis get to you first semester
Still take challenging classes! Schools are looking for progression in difficulty
Those mid year transcripts REALLY DO MATTER!
College apps, man
Make sure you’re communicating with your counselor to make sure you have everything ready and on track
like file the FAFSA and CSS (used for lots of privates)
tbh I didn’t think it would help me a lot but it (the CSS) actually did so just do it even if you think you’ll get nothing
Ok so hopefully at this point you have a feel for what schools you are interested in
Things to consider: location, price, size, public/private, difficulty of the application, ranking, program/major you are applying to, campus, overall vibe
I didn’t do any interviews but maybe look into it
Don’t get too comfortable and set reasonable goals - apply to several safety schools, a few good options/could go either way schools, but also a few “reaches”
ESSAYS
I’m no college counselor, but don’t just wing your essays without having an adult/professional look over them
I got lucky - my mom is a professional writer so my family didn’t pay for a counselor
Do your research - you can find so much information about what schools are looking for in essays
If an essay is “optional” DO IT it’s really not optional lol
Keep in mind - these essays are nothing like what you’ve been taught. You don’t have to (and often SHOULDNT) write a 5 paragraph essay with topic sentences relating back to the thesis and evidence, etc. its much more free
think “What is the story I am going to tell?”
get creative - this is hard and takes some time
Think: How am I going to separate myself from thousands of applicants? What is a story that ONLY I can tell?
DO EARLY ACTION FOR AS MANY SCHOOLS AS POSSIBLE!!!
such a relief to knowing you got in somewhere in like,,,, november
acceptance rates are higher for EA
the order from highest to lowest is ED > EA > RD
Early Decision scares me (schools will say they give equal scholarship consideration but lol thats a lie)
but if you have your heart set on a school go ahead
apply to other school just in case, you don’t want to get stuck starting all your apps when a lot of students have already turned them all in
Now that you’re done with applications (whew), the acceptances (and rejection) will start coming!! yay!
ok first for acceptances
those first acceptances are so cool like YAY YOU GOT INTO COLLEGE IM PROUD OF U
as soon as you get your first acceptances really start researching the school more and deciding if you’d REALLY want to go there or not
i know this is hard bc you haven't heard back from all your schools but it’ll make choosing a school so much easier
sadly, not all acceptances are happy tho
like I got accepted to my #1 school but they gave me no money so it was impossible to go
I was so emo for a couple days there
BUT! If you’re serious about it, try appealing for financial aid but keep your expectations low
ok now waitlists
these can be a bit nerve wracking
PLEASE apply for the waitlist right away
at some schools if you dont within a couple days, your application might get thrown out
aaaaand rejections
i dont have a lot to say about this but please dont be too hard on yourself
sometimes its just not meant to be and thats ok!
NOW PICKING A COLLEGE
def the most difficult and mentally draining part for me lol
make sure you really map out everything to consider
net cost (tuition, room & board, books, travel, personal expenses, etc.), size, location, etc.
I personally had this idea that I’d end up at a big school far from home but I’m going to a small school close to home and I’m still super excited!!! So make sure you give every school a second look
APPLY FOR SCHOLARSHIPS!
the essays aren’t usually too bad and sometimes you can just rework your college app essays
you can find them online, your school might have some (like PTA scholarships, band scholarships, etc.)
ok this is the time everyone really gets senioritis
i almost didn’t get senioritis at all lol just because slacking off stressed me out
but please be smart about it dont get rescinded
and lastly have fun! high school really does fly by, it’ll be over before you know it
#lol the senior year part is so much longer than the others#studyblr#high school#high school tips#study tips#studyspo#study motivation
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