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onisiondrama · 5 years ago

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“Billy and Sarah Talk after Onision’s House Stream“ Tea Clips

Billy streamed again explaining why he went to Greg / James’ house and acted the way he did. It was a 6 and a half hour stream so I’m definitely not going to watch the whole thing lol but this is an hour long clip from when Sarah came in to talk to Billy. I’ll take notes.

Sarah said in July 2019, Greg was supposed to go with Billy and Joe to a filming meeting but Greg canceled because he wanted her to come up while Kai was away so Sarah can date him. When he broke up with Sarah, he went to film with them while she was home alone crying on the phone with a friend. She asked Billy if Greg ever mentioned there was an 18 year old girl back at his house. Billy said no.

Billy said he would always ask if Greg about the thruple, ask if he was bringing anyone new in. He said it was half joking, but half he wanted to know what was going on because he knew girls that wanted to be part of the relationship. Sarah mentions like Jessica or [I can’t make out this name, I think Anna?]. Billy says Greg would always tell him one girl is too much work.

Sarah says Greg would have Youtubers over while she was there before. She mentions seeing Anastasia before. She says Tony V came over and he saw them all in bed together when she was 17 and didn’t say anything.

She asks Billy if he saw anything what would he have done. He says if he knew shit was going down when she was underage he would have went to the cops or told everybody.

He says he was still hanging out with Greg because he thought Greg was getting better and Billy took Sarah’s word for it when she said nothing was happening. He says when she said otherwise, he changed. Sarah says but you still went to his house and gave him an opportunity to make fun of everything that happened, like when Greg talked about her “candy tits”. She asks why he didn’t say anything. Billy defends himself and says he felt like the more he let Greg talk, the more damning information Greg would say.

He says he was a coward for not sticking up for Sarah and says he was uncomfortable. He apologies. Sarah says Shiloh, Billie, Regina, and Haylee are hurt and not happy.

Billy points out when Greg compared how he treats 18 year olds to how Peter treats Meg (from Family Guy), Billy said Peter Griffin didn’t fuck Meg, but when he said that it was covered by a TTS.

Sarah says Greg was really mean to her, but when he was nice he was touchy.

Sarah says Greg came out to talk to them because Greg knows he can manipulate people he personally knows to see his point of view. Billy says he didn’t see his point of view and Sarah says it looks like he did because he didn’t say anything.

Billy agrees with the criticism from viewers that he was “fucked” by Greg and titled this current stream “I shouldn’t have gone to Onision’s house”. He explains why he went.

Sarah says she knows how Greg can make things seem a certain way when it’s not at all that way, but it would have been more powerful for Billy to go as a grown man who has a personal relationship with Greg. Sarah asks if Billy has sat Greg down and explained to him that he’s in deep shit and tell him shouldn’t mock what’s going on. She says even if Greg ran away it would have been better than letting him talk about 17 / 18 year old vaginas. Billy agrees and defends himself more.

Sarah says she thinks Joe is hilarious from what she’s seen in Greg’s videos and from clips that didn’t make it into videos, but what Joe said during the stream did not sit right with her.

Sarah asks if Billy is afraid of Greg, he says “I am definitely-” it was cut off by a TTS.

Billy says he went because he was was enchanted by the views and money and he thought he could pull it off and make it work and it blew up in his face. Sarah says he was profiting off her abuse and the abuse of other girls.

Billy explains the events that lead up to his decision to go to Greg’s house.

They talk about how everything is a joke to Joe. Sarah says this isn’t funny to her. It’s not funny when she wakes up in the middle of the night screaming and shaking thinking she’s back in that house.

Billy explains what happened when he got to Greg’s and apologizes to Sarah. He was thankful she came on to explain how he hurt everyone and he said he read Regina’s tweets and they were not wrong.

Sarah addresses people in the chat saying she’s lying. She says she doesn’t even know how she’d make this up. It’s too intricate.

Sarah points out if Billy saw Greg as a regular person (something he’s said earlier, that he only had good interactions with Greg) and wasn’t intimidated by him, why wouldn’t he be able to call him out. Billy says he isn’t intimidated by him, but Greg was naming his friend and when it involves the emotions of people he knows and he wants to not bring any more attention to her and when Greg was saying stuff about the girls, he was very intimidated.

Sarah says she was devastated by the clips she saw on twitter.

About Greg saying Sarah raped them, she says it’s complete bullshit and doesn’t know how he could say that unchecked. Billy says he asked Greg about that the day he went to personally confront Greg after Sarah had first came out about her story. He says that day Greg had him sign an NDA [Billy holds it up on camera but it’s too small to see]. He says it was dated August 24th. She asked if Greg made anyone else sign NDAs in January. Billy says no. Sarah says then they lied to her, they told her they were having everyone in their lives sign them. She says Greg had her sign one the day after they were first intimate. Billy says he believes her.

Billy says when he confronted Greg, Greg was trying to say things without saying names because of the NDAs. “You do this, somebody does this, then you do this.” Says Greg implied rape was involved and Billy thought it was stupid.

Sarah tells Billy how he was when Greg was doing the sexual things to him, that’s exactly how she was so she doesn’t know what he’s talking about. Billy said because of his size he could have fought Greg and won when Greg did that to him, he could have told him to stop but he froze up. He says he feels like he had more power in the situation than Sarah so he can’t imagine how she felt.

She said she was horrified after seeing the clips on twitter and didn’t even want to do this anymore. This is pointless, this is a shit show, this is a mockery. She says she wishes Joe and Billy took it more seriously. She understands Joe likes to make jokes, but why weren’t the jokes directed at Greg? He’s the one in the wrong. She says there is no way Greg is the victim. There are many people who have spoken out.

Sarah says she just turned 16 when she met Greg. It was planned for her to go since she was 15. Sarah says Greg said to Kai after they got in their first big break up after Billie, “why don’t we just wait for Sarah to turn 18?” She was 15 at that time. She says she had been romantically talking to Kai at that point. Billy agrees that’s fucked up and gross.

Billy says when Greg said 17 and 18 year old girls are crazy, he points out he asked Greg then why did it take you so long to stop fucking them if they’re so crazy. Billy says there is a reason why Greg picks 17 / 18 year old girls, because they’ll put up with his shit.

Billy says when he found out Greg had been intimate with Sarah it shocked him because he really believed nothing was going on.

He says Jessica came out on twitter and said they were toying with her and was ghosted by them when Sarah came to the house. He says that’s what they do to people. He says it’s cruel to raise the hopes of a fan who would do anything for them, even show up to their house and clean and take care of their kids. Sarah says imagine going through that from 14 years old to 17.

Sarah says she doesn’t want money and never wanted money. She says only Repzion and one fan gave her money, but hearing when someone asked if the proceeds from Billy’s stream would go to victims, him answering “No this isn’t a charity stream” with such power behind his voice was upsetting. She says they’re not charity cases, but it’s upsetting seeing someone make so much money off of making fun of them with their abuser. Billy explains himself.

Sarah replies to people in the chat who say Chris Hansen should donate the money he makes too and says she doesn’t disagree with that.

Billy says everyone keeps asking about the laptop. Sarah says she has it. He asks if they did anything with it. She says Vincent held onto it and never opened it. She says he lied to her and said he sent it to the FBI. She says she has the laptop and phone and she’s not touching it. She says she has 100% certainty there is CP she sent to Kai on her phone. Billy asks why they didn’t do anything with it. She says she doesn’t know.

Sarah says she still has faith is Chris Hansen, but she is not involved with anything going forward. She says it really upset her. She says she’ll give the laptop to the FBI as soon as they talk to her. She says if it turns out things aren’t happening with the FBI, she’ll keep it until it’s needed.

Billy asks if she feels like Chris is doing his best to help or if he’s just running his Youtube channel. She says she doesn’t know and doesn’t trust anybody. That’s why she had them send the laptop back. She says putting her faith in them was not the correct move. She’s just waiting for things to get a move on. She says she’s overwhelmed with everything that’s going on and is very stressed out.

Billy says he was hoping best case scenario when he showed up to Greg’s house was he’d call the police on his, but he allowed himself to be in the worst case scenario which was him laughing at shit he doesn’t think is funny. Sarah asks then why did he let Greg do it. She says when you’re dealing with neutrality when dealing with an abuser is siding with him. Billy says he was trying to not make Greg defensive. He says when Greg is defensive he just says the same points, but when he’s comfortable he says fucked up shit. He didn’t want to stop him from possibly saying anything damning.

Sarah replies to people in the chat telling her to turn in the laptop. She says she’s going to do what she needs to do. She’s not going to keep it for herself. It has CP on it, she doesn’t want it. She is in contact with lawyers and it’s not over. Just because she’s not making everything public doesn’t mean nothing is happening. She says because of what happened with Vincent, she’s taking things into her own hands.

Billy says Chris and Vincent have been a shit show. They’re making money off of making it seem like they’re going to stop a predator. Sarah says she barely talks to Chris. She says she doesn’t know what’s going on with that.

Billy says Greg called him earlier that week and messaged friends of his to get in touch, but Billy was ignoring him for months. He says he knew it was a bad idea to go and he froze up and was a bitch and he hurt a lot of people. Sarah says she hopes the girls can listen to this and know Billy doesn’t stand by what was said. Sarah says she hopes Joe addresses this. Billy says Joe is very removed from the internet. Sarah says she wants him to know he hurt her and the other victims.

Billy invites her to come back onto his show to have a platform to talk about this or just to have fun. He says he knows he’s hurt the girls and she’s always welcome to come at him if he’s an asshole because he always wants to hear when he fucked up. She says she appreciates him being open to having her on the show even though she knows she’s a bitch. Billy says he’s friends with a lot of bitches and asshole. Sarah says well she doesn’t groom children. He laughs and says he’s not friends with groomers anymore. He’s not friends with Onision and doesn’t condone what he does.

Sarah talks about the clip where Greg says she raped him or pushed him into doing things. She says if anyone was pushing anyone, Greg was the one that pushed her and Kai.

She says after the stream she had multiple calls with the girls and they were like “what the fuck.” She says she isn’t upset with Billy giving Greg a platform, but more that he didn’t hold Greg accountable and instead let people pressure Billy into turning it into something it wasn’t supposed to be and letting them get hurt. He says there was a point where he tried to end it. He says Greg overwhelmed him and he fucked it up and reverted to what he’s comfortable with, comedy.

Sarah says she appreciates Billy’s apology and for allowing her to ask questions. She says she knows the humping thing Greg did wasn’t cool. Billy says he must have thought he could do that because of videos they made together. He says the stick/sword thing was dumb.

Billy asks about when Sarah said Greg would keep her from Joe and Billy because he didn’t want them to know something was going on. She says the night after they were all together she went to a birthday party for one of Greg’s children with all of his family there and they were all talking about what happened before in a closed room, but when the family came in it was an unspoken rule that they would all shut up. She says his family all knows her and she had to pretend everything was fine. She says Greg’s mother would call her her foster daughter and always gave her Christmas presents and didn’t know her son was fucking her (Sarah). She says she doesn’t know how someone is supposed to deal with that.

Billy says Greg went to great lengths to contact him. He says Greg even contacted people he had falling outs with in the past to apologize to them because he thought they were the reason Billy wasn’t talking to him. He tried to mend their relationship just to talk to Billy.

Sarah says there is a video sill on Greg’s channel from when she was 16. It’s a video of them playing video games together and Greg titles it “Onision destroys a teenager.”

Sarah says when Greg canceled his trip with Billy and Joe for Sarah, she told Greg he didn’t have to cancel and she would go with him and he said no because he didn’t want any questions. She says the fact that she was a secret raised red flags for her.

Billy says he believed Greg’s lies about not wanting more girls in his relationship.

Sarah says she didn’t bring up Kai in this talk because that’s not why she came on, but Kai is just as guilty as Greg if not more. She says it doesn’t matter if she still has love for Kai, he definitely broke the law.

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androgynousblackbox · 5 years ago

Note

I used to be a fan of creepshow but since she got a bigger following and became buddies with other youtubers she's changed. Idk I feel like back when she was smaller you could critique her and she would listen if it was done in a polite way but as I've seen in the last few days those days are clearly gone. It's always the same shit with youtubers as soon as they get bigger they all see criticism as just some haters and people chasing for clout. She seem spiteful these days.

I used to be a suscriber too until it came out a video of her saying “you must accept criticism as a content creator, no matter how insulting it is, because how else are you as an artist suposed to improve??” and unsuscribed because I hate that mentality. I would still have some of her videos recommended to me and I would watch as white note while doing something else, and for that I can tell there was certainly a shift on the way she handled topics or what topics she used. For one, she stopped talking about general artist stuff or youtubers on the artists community to be more broadly drama. I have no doubt this happened specifically because she must have noticed that general drama is a lot more profitable than art drama. So she started talking about Shane Dawson, James Charles and Trisha Paytas and other trendy topics like that, because that was on everyone’s mind and of course would bring a lot of traffic. All she said was information readibly available for everyone and it wasn’t nothing specially controversial. Until then everything was fine. It was silly drama, after all.But then she started talking more about Onision, Vanity and Yaniv, real known predators/abusers whose crimes are extremely serious and should be handled by authorities, and that is where I think she started to get this idea that she was the chosen one to talk about Real Issues(tm). She is someone with no media traning, no training in law, no training in how to handle these serious topics, just a “normal” person with opinions and, fuck, that seemed to be enough. People were telling her “thank god you are speaking about this”, “this person is so awful, we need people like you dennouncing them”, “you are so right, you speaking the truth, queen, yes, just tell them” and other things that convinced her then that she was doing the right thing. That she was making a difference. That this was good. That no one else was going to do what she was doing, so it should be done.So she started to get sloppier. After all, she just had to report things easy to find online and she would get praise for it. Why would you ever need anything else? I first really noticed this with that video about some lady supposedly faking so many illnesses, injuries and food alergies. This lady is the face of body positivity for a lot of people and also for disabled visibility, so she was big and she faking having all those issues was also big. What a fraud! So Crapshow reunited all the “evidence” and put it out. Hey, guys, it’s Sharon, and today we are going to speak about this lady possibly lying for attention, don’t forget to like and suscribe! She didn’t consult with any disabled person about how common the experiences of that lady actually were. She didn’t stopped to think how common is to doubt disabled people’s struggles and how damaging it can be for them spread the narrative that you can “prove” someone’s disability, that in fact you should, because fakers are bad and we can’t allow them to exist, no matter how disproportianaly affects disabled people and their hability to get the assistance they need. People told her this. There was no way no one in the internet wasn’t going to let her know maybe that was unnecesary and irresponsible thing to do. But the response of people telling her “yeeaaaah, you tell them, queen, you bring down those fakers!”, “my queen Sharon is speaking nothing but the truth!”, “I am so glad you are covering this!” was greater and they were more people, so why shouldn’t listen to them instead? They were the majority, and it couldn’t be that ableism is a thing so normalized that people fell into it without realizing, so case close.Then she talked about MAPs in twitter (don’t drag me to map discourse o I will block you) and once again she was getting praised for her bravery and resolution to save the kiddies, for talking about dangerous people, for talking about Real Issues that were Important. The look from that high horse must have been amazing for her, I bet. From there, it was only a matter of time before she spoke about “cartoon cp”. It could have been loli or shota in general, about how it’s wrong and it’s disgusting and how she cannot believe there are people who seek that content out, when those are lItErAlLy cHiLdReN and bla bla bla. Let’s forget about how she defended just-a-fish from detractors who used him following a loli account as a reason to hate on him and call him a pedophile. Let’s forget about how she defended an artist from backlash after making a grown up version of a teen character. Let’s forget about how she has claimed to be the saviour of big titty drawn ladies because art and it’s fine and you are all too damn sensitive. Let’s forget how none of her videos are age restricted and when she still posted her own speedrawings, a lot of times those drawings were about naked ladies.Let’s forget about all of that. There is kiddies to save, money to make and, hey, this should be easy, right? I am sure someone was “hey, Sharon, now that you are speaking about predators on twitter, how about you speak about this artist that does this disgusting shit. Just look at this lewd images and don’t even paid attention to the context of abuse. These literal kiddies are naked! And they do lewd stuff! You have to talk about this, Crapshow, we need you” and that is all she needed. As I said, she was getting sloppier and sloppier already so easy target (small account), easy subject (kiddies in danger!), easy to talk about (it’s disgusting, therefore this is illegal!), so of course she was going to get into it with her personal disgust as the only reason for anything.As long she keeps being praised for the shit she does, she is never have a reason to change her mentality. I am sure she thinks she only spoked the truth, that this was something that should have happened, that this was important and if no one else is talking about it, then, why else does she have a platform. But the way she reacted to people telling her how wrong she was, that only made it clear she gives a solid fuck about honesty or compassion. It’s all performative, just like antis have always been performative. Can you even imagine Crapshow going against her audience’s opinion on anything, ever? I can’t.

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ohnohetaliasues · 5 years ago

Text

Stones to Abbigale {Ch. 1}

(Kat)

This is going to be the worst thing I’ve ever read, isn’t it?

Am I going to actively want to die? Yes, most likely. But apparently, because I run a blog like this, I can endure suffering.

Flashbacks to Blood Raining Night.

Here we go. We will start with the introduction, written by the onion lord himself.

I want to be direct, my name is Greg. I go by “Onision” online.

Okay, I dunno what it is, but something feels off about this sentence.

This book is made up of events that occurred in my own life mixed with fiction from the made up life of James. James is essentially a better version of myself.

I can’t imagine how good that could be, seeing as the man who wrote this is a child predator and is just an overall piece of hot garbage.

His home, his school & his life all resemble my own at his age.

Don’t ever use a fucking ampersand instead of the word ‘and.’ It’s just bad grammar.

The people James analyzes and is surrounded by are not so unlike those I’ve known as well.

Analyzes?

Why?

I have experienced much of the loss James has however his happier moments are more often than not also mine.

Then write a memoir. Not this.

I want to share my story without it being purely non-fiction.

I mean, some people do this with books about their lives, but this feels... Odd?

I simply felt this approach would make for a far better book. At points I cried while writing this, at others I laughed.

Congratulations.

I don’t care.

Stones To Abbigale is not just a book I wrote, it is a piece of who I am.

That’s a given for all writers, but I still don’t care.

I’m going to rip this book to shreds.

Okay here we go.

I was asleep until I met her, but when I woke, I learned the meaning of "perfect imperfection."

Is this Onion boy trying to be poetic?

It actually made me want to die.

I've always been the type of person to focus on stars as we spin beneath them, the cool breeze on a sunny day, scattered patches of grass under my feet, the world around me, often forgetting to even glance at the one within.

‘The one within.’

Okay so the way this is written makes those three things seem disconnected. I often do stuff like this when I write, but I’d write it like ‘as we spin beneath them, focus on the breeze on a sunny day, on the scattered patches of grass, etc.’

You couldn’t pay me all the money in the world to rewrite that garbage sentence. This is all very waxing poetic and not in a good well structured way.

I had remained emotionally unexplored for so much of my life.

That must’ve been boring, not experiencing human emotions like the rest of us.

You sociopath, you.

It's painful knowing some can go an entire lifetime without understanding their own heart, an internal lock waiting for the right key to change everything.

Yeah, whatever, shut the hell up, you whiny idiot.

This is like an introduction by a teenager who just opened a poetry book and was like ‘yup. I wanna write like that.’

Except you aren’t William Blake or Walt Whitman and you never will be.

Sorry, Onion boy.

Except I’m not.

Die mad about it, grease ball.

It was the first Monday of November. I opened my eyes, blinded by my recently painted wall-to-wall white room. Even my bed frame, constructed of purely metal, was painted white.

Okay, cool. I’m a descriptive writer and I take every chance I can get to mention details, but even I find this description awkward. It feels irrelevant in this situation.

It bounced off the walls causing my eyelids to desperately clamp together. Painting my room like this was a clear act of subtle self-inflicted psychological torture.

Then why in the sweet hell did you do it? Do you enjoy suffering?

Actually, he probably does.

Because this is edgy as hell.

I was going through another phase, from darkness to light, and repeat. Seemed like the story of my life.

This is so edgy I am in physical pain.

You know your symbolism is good when it’s so random that you have to point it out and explain it to your audience.

My mom could see the darker colors were depressing me, I felt comforted by them, but found there were good aspects of both extremes. I was happy to visit either side, they are both so simple. But right now the intense light bouncing from wall to wall felt like it was ripping my mind in two.

Am I an idiot or is that just... word salad?

My mom didn't wake me. My alarm clock sat on my dresser with no explanation for it's failure to function. The clock only illuminated a blank stare with 8:17 written all over it's face. While entirely robotic, I imagined the clock to have the dumbest possible expression, one complementing its failure to behave any way outside its random glitch-infested nature.

That was the worst way to write a personification ever, but okay.

In the reflection of it's plastic face I could see myself unconsciously making the dumb expression I was imaging the clock to have. I laughed in my casual dorky tone and began to get ready to leave home.

I’m not laughing, idiot.

Without breakfast, I left for school with a bogus note in hand to idealistically explain my tardiness.

You... You wrote a fake note?

Do you realize you could get in trouble for that?

You’re an idiot.

I think most of my teachers were too exhausted to worry about small variances in our appearance from time to time. With how low their pay likely was, I imagined there were very few rules most teachers cared about.

That isn’t true at all. Teachers have to pay attention to rules unless they want to get, I dunno, fired.

It was another cold day in Lakewood. The wind hit my eyes forcing tears to form in the corners as I sped along the sidewalk at a no-doubt unreasonable speed.

I cannot imagine any good imagery for this scene. I’m just imagining this gif:

I passed Lauren and Raymon walking the opposite direction, no doubt headed toward the nearby church where all the students go to smoke, make out and hide out till school ends.

Um okay. Does this guy know that if characters don’t have relivance to the story, if they have no reason to be named, than they don’t have to be?

No.

Because he’s a 34 year old man baby.

They seemed so childish as they held hands and smiled excitedly as if they had gotten away with some tremendous crime.

That sentence seems so robotic I genuinely can’t.

Mr. Hanson, my heavy-set, middle-aged history teacher, rolled his eyes as I walked into class. "James, talk to me after class" he said quickly, looking away from me as if I were an undervalued employee who was barely important enough to make eye contact with let alone deliver a full sentence to.

It bothers me so deeply that a new paragraph wasn’t started when this character talked.

"I have a note," I said. He ignored me, and continued his lecture on yet another topic that would not only be completely useless later in life, but wasn't even relevant for even a few seconds after the words left his mouth.

Why is this teacher acting like a petty teenager?

I’m deeply annoyed by this.

And yeah, it’s relevant. You have tests, you idiot. Take notes. And it’s also history, which is, again, relevant.

In conclusion, shut your mouth and stop bitching.

There was only 15 minutes left in the class, but I felt it would be more stimulating to integrate myself into the room to yet again study my classmates' behavior than to sit in a hall watching the rows of scum covered tiles inevitably slide off the decaying walls.

That’s a health code violation, friends.

Or Onion is an awful writer and he thinks describing a school like this is a good idea. My money is on that.

For as long as I remember I've enjoyed seeing how people move around and talk to each other, like they're all animals at the zoo.

Something is wrong with you, friend. Liking to people watch is one thing, but doing shit like this is something else entirely.

Uh, try sociopath-like?

Creepy as hell?

We’ll go with both.

I would try to deliver a more accurate analogy if I felt there was one

Bitch, there is. I can’t name one off the top of my head because reading this makes me feel like my brain is melting out of my ears, but I’m 100% sure there is a better analogy. Even though this feels more like a simile.

but so many of them seemed incredibly unaware of themselves, just living life as if it were some generic predefined routine.

Oh, and you’re so much better obviously, you pretentious bastard.

Sometimes I felt like an alien who had a VIP pass to submerge myself in primitive human culture just for entertainment.

Congratulations, that’s also what you sound like.

I sense everything I can take in around me. The seemingly limitless audible tones, tremors in the voices of growing children rang in my ears. In studying people, I found myself gradually learning to literally feel the various personality types I encountered.

Do you... Do you have psychic powers?

If not, shut your damn mouth.

I hyper analyzed every inconsistent smell, the seemingly random clothing styles, freckles, and assorted hairstyles filled my mind with questions. Trying to rationalize and understand what sequence of events led them to decide who they would become.

You are the most pretentious protagonist I have ever read. I’m half a chapter in and I already fucking hate you.

This character is so poorly written and immediately unlikable. i cannot relate to him at all and if someone does, I suggest you go get some help because how this asshole is behaving doesn’t sound human.

I took favor of categorizing most everyone around me. The socially inept know-it-all, the dumb attention-seeking drama kid

On behalf of all drama kids, go fuck yourself.

and the bleach blonde bimbo who gets overly defensive at the slightest hint of criticism.

Do you mean you?

Onion obviously didn’t let anyone edit this garbage.

Then there were the kids who just hoped no one noticed them at all. There was so much to be seen, to be considered and organized in my mind.

Mhm.

I don’t care.

Class had just ended so I walked over to Mr. Hanson's' desk &

And*

placed the tardy note down in passing. As I walked out with the rest of my class, he called after me. "James! We still need to talk!" I responded but continued to walk outside the room. "I have to be early to my next class! Let's talk tomorrow!"

You’re an asshole.

And I hate you.

I walked quickly down the hall towards my art class, which was awkwardly placed in a trailer outside my clearly poorly funded high school.

Um.

Okay.

On my way to the class a fight had already broken out between two jocks who, no doubt, both had controlling, iron-fisted fathers who brainwashed them into believing conflicts between men are best resolved with the bloodying of their fists.

That’s a bold thing to assume, dear Onion.

These kinds of men plagued my mind with wonder. I could not conceive a scenario in which they could justify their primitive & pointless mentalities yet they would always continue to perpetuate their self-destructive attitudes as if it offered the slightest legitimate benefit.

Oh, shut your pretentious mouth.

Most everyone nearby crowded around the fight. None of them likely cared who was winning, what it was about or how far it went. All they ever seemed to show concern for was their own amusement, always excited to see violence without having to pull out their wallets to pay for it.

Are you joking?

Where are the teachers?

This is complete bullshit.

This is high school, not a fucking fight club.

Does Onion even try to make this believable? Or is he just vomiting all over his keyboard and just accepting whatever nonsense that makes?

As the sounds of flesh collided fist to cheek & chest quickly followed the howls from the surrounding students. They would scream "Oooohhhh!" as if it were sincerely delightful to witness creatures like themselves suffer & fall apart before their eyes.

The use of ampersands is making me lose my goddamn mind.

Even if I had time to stop, I never really took pleasure in seeing strangers hurt each other. Most all fights seemed avoidable and were often initiated for a senseless reason.

Go choke on air. This protagonist annoys me more than any protagonist has. I’m not joking. Fuck this dickwad.

I know, you could say it's more complicated than that, I would like to think it were as well, but reality trumps the way I wish things would be. There's no sense in fighting it when doing so rarely helps anyone.

While this is true, this is worded in a way that’s so pretentious it’s painful and also in a way that paints this protagonist in such a white knight-y way that it makes me want to die.

As I approached my next class the image of Abbi's face illuminated the neon walls of my mind like a projector teasing a theatre screen with fleeting moments of depth & purpose.

That is complete and utter word salad. Stop immediately.

Ever since I met her, she had occupied a part of my consciousness; whenever I wasn't near her I missed her to an unrealistic extent. You could call my longing sad especially considering we had barely talked; she just had a strange effect on me, one no doubt similar to a willful addiction.

That’s called a crush, but the way that was just described is so creepy.

There are people in life which we pass by on a daily basis, barely aware of their existence, but on an exceptionally rare occasion you can find a person who fills an area inside your little world you didn't even realize needed filling.

While that’s technically not untrue, it feels like a lizard person is trying to tell me what having a crush on someone is like.

As I walked up the creaking stairs into my art class trailer I could see Abbi was sitting at her shared-desk, alone, same makeup, hairstyle & general appearance I had thought about repeatedly over the last couple days. She was drawing pictures on her blue-lined paper, distracting herself from the cold that filled the oddly glowing room.

This... This imagery is so fucking weird.

I smiled slightly trying not to be too obvious and sat down on my chilled metal chair positioned a few seats to the left in front of her. Glancing over, I could see she hadn't moved at all, I felt like she didn't even notice me come in.

You aren’t the center of her world, so yeah, she’s focused on something else. That’s just how it is, asshat.

I wanted to inspire some acknowledgment of my existence from Abbi so I opened my mouth to greet her when my fingers brushed up against freshly smeared gum under my desk. "Eeew!" I shouted out on impulse. She looked up at me with a blank expression.

I’ve accidentally touched gum on the bottom of my desk before, as I can imagine everyone has, but I’ve never shouted about it like a lunatic.

Bursting into the room came a group of boys. "Dude I think John's done bro!" one of the other boys laughed, saying "Won't see them for a week at least."

Nobody talks like this. Have you ever spoke to another human?

I looked back at Abbi to see she also didn't react to their outburst. Strangely knowing that her apathy was generalized and impersonal gave me comfort.

There needs to be a comma after ‘strangely,’ but whatever.

Her influence on how I felt was obviously dangerous but I didn't care as no matter how fond I was of the idea that I was not of the world, I knew my place and had no real interest in pretending otherwise.

Explain to me how in the hell that’s dangerous.

Jason, one of the boys energetically praising the fight they had just seen, sat in his seat next to Abbi. I smirked watching her shoulders shift away from him. Her body language sent a loud message that she had the same impression of Jason as I did. He was just another moron, placed on this Earth to live his life completely unexamined,

That word is not used properly in that sentence.

a pawn that had no awareness of its own role let alone that it was just another tiny component within a massive unstoppably twisted game.

Shut your pretentious mouth because that doesn’t make any goddamn fucking sense.

I know it sounds morbid and condescending but my attitude was just something that naturally developed the more I studied human behavior.

Bullshit.

I would be more optimistic but I find doing so would be like walking into a room with no windows and turning out the light. If you refuse to see the world around you for what it is you're just wasting your eyes.

Being optimistic means looking on the good side of things. You’ve heard the glass half empty or half full thing. it’s that. And as someone who jumps between optimism and pessimism, being optimistic isn’t like this at all.

Don’t try to be poetic or funny, Onion. Those are two things that you aren’t.

Art class was about to begin. My teacher, Mrs. Stanley, who looked like she should have retired a ridiculous thirty years ago, approached the front of the room talking about how art is sacred. She also discussed the random object she had us all draw the previous school day and ironically graded it by using her own narrow-minded definition of art.

That isn’t ironic.

I always wondered how teachers could even attempt objectively grading art. Is there any logic behind validating a form of self-expression using a cold black and white mathematical system?

It’s a class where you have to follow the curricula. Shut your damn mouth.

And this is coming from someone who hated her art teacher. But this art teacher was so utterly closed minded that she didn’t accept anyone else’s creative process. She basically told us that if we didn’t follow her process, we weren’t real artists.

"Today I'm going to place you with partners" Mrs. Stanley said as she pulled out sheets of paper outlining our activities to come. "To keep this simple, I'm going to partner you with the person you are currently assigned to share a desk with" she said. I sighed knowing I was bound to be paired up with Alex, a guy I had specifically asked to be seated away from ever since he peed in a jar literally right next to me under our desk, acting like he was so cool for publicly exposing himself while simultaneously urinating.

That... He expected to be treated like he was cool for this?

That’s fucking disgusting.

It happened weeks ago and I still can't figure out what kind of crazy it takes for you to, in the presence of people you barely know but have to see nearly on a daily basis, pee in a jar held in your hand just beneath your desk in the middle of a classroom.

At first when I read this, I thought that the wayit was worded made it sound like Alex forced James to hold the jar while he peed in it, but okay, whatever.

What then? You show it off like you will be praised and accepted as if it were an accomplishment? Alex, despite being borderline mental, was one of my least favorite people to study.

It is actually physically exhausting to read this shit. James is a pretentious asshole.

I couldn't help but feel there was some defect in his mind that invalidated the point of conducting a thorough analysis of him.

This just makes it seem like James has mind reading powers.

He was completely irrelevant when considering the realities of normal human behavior.

Behavior you don’t act according to, you lizard person sociopath.

As I was off on a tangent in my own mind I heard a familiar voice ring out, one that inspired the very same emotion you experience when a song you had forgotten you loved, randomly plays in the background of your daily life. "Can I be paired up with James?" her voice was just as I remembered.

Is this Abbi?

I have a friend who spells her name like this, so I really hate that there’s a character in this shitty book who shares a name with her.

Despite her having not spoken in class in some time, she hadn't changed a note. Abbi had interrupted the teacher just to partner with me, but I asked myself if was it really just to work with me or just to get away from Jason.

Um. Okay.

The teacher, looking irritated but understanding Abbi's discomfort with Jason responded "Alex and Jason, you'll be partners. James, switch seats with Jason" "Thank you!" Abbi said with a slight smile. With a cocky grin Jason stood up and in a comedic fashion smelled his armpit. "Wow, I didn't know I smelled that bad" Jason said as he walked over to sit by Alex.

That isn’t funny and Onion boy isn’t funny.

Approaching Abbi was no doubt a way scarier act in my mind than it was to everyone around me, I felt like my head was burning from the inside out.

That’s a little extreme.

Nevertheless I continued to remind myself that her public outcry to partner with me could have meant nothing. I sat down next to her and did all I could not to turn into a complete dork on her. She reached out and grabbed the project outline that was being passed out. Mrs. Stanley began to read the description of the assignment. "Today you will both be taking something meaningful, but expendable, from your own homes."

If something is meaningful it isn’t expendable. Stop.

Mrs. Stanley looked up and emphasized, "That you own!" then looked back down at her paper. "You will tear those items apart here in class. You will then take those items and, using the adhesives, staples and the strings available in class, find a way to create something new out of those possessions."

That’s actually kind of an interesting idea. But like. Maybe with a cup? I don’t wanna rip apart something I care about.

She looked up and said in a low voice sounding somewhat like Dracula "Two, will become one."

That is unnecessarily creepy. It reads like an innuendo.

Also, what in fresh hell does Dracula’s voice sound like?

Did she say it with a Transylvanian accent? I’m confused.

Jason raised his hand objecting, "All due respect Mrs. Stanley I'm not breaking something of mine for this class."

Jason has the right idea.

She replied putting her hands on her hips, "That's fine Jason. We'll supply you with a toilet paper rolls, we have plenty of extras around here." Jason suddenly looked disturbed and sarcastically spouted "Freaking great!"

Why???

That’s better than ripping apart a t-shirt.

Mrs. Stanley asked, "Are you sure? Your grade shouldn't suffer that much if you two just take Alex's piss jar and tape it to a toilet paper roll. You're already failing this class."

What in the literal fuck?!

You cannot say that to students. No, you can’t say that to anyone.

Jason couldn't believe what she had just said

Same.

and Alex maintained an awkward frozen facial expression with his mouth slightly open in his normal weirdo somewhat robotic fashion.

"Oh my god" Abbi whispered under her breath with a slight smirk. I grinned uncontrollably; just seeing her amused was amazing to me.

That wasn’t really funny, it was just shocking.

I could hear a scream in the back of my mind reminding me my dorkiness and borderline obsession was escaping through my face.

It's not that I couldn't help being in awe of Abbi and basically every little thing she did, I simply didn't want to change how I felt. In a way, she was like your favorite song or book, you could pretend not to like it and in time with the right mental coaching maybe you would sincerely dislike it, but life just felt so much better embracing your condition entirely, letting all your nerdy admiration flow freely.

This just reads like an obsession. I don’t have the energy to actually express how romantic feelings actually feel, but this is terrifying.

Mrs. Stanley continued, "If there's anyone else who has an issue, please take it up with my 1800 number which is?" She put her hand up to the air signaling the students to react but only a couple kids replied aloud with her catch phrase. "1-800-BOO-HOOO" they mumbled.

Sweet Jesus.

So this is what it feels like to lose my mind.

She continued, "Good, now for the rest of class please work with your partner on what you plan to bring and draw up a prototype sketch of what you feel your final piece of art will look like." Mrs. Stanley walked to the back of her room and sat down at her 1950's looking rust-infested desk.

Is this school just a giant health code violation? And what the hell do you mean by ‘1950′s desk?’ All I got when I googled that were pictures of wooden desks.

I would always laugh internally when I looked at the old thing. Maybe it was my way of coping with the fact I attended one of the most run down schools in the state.

I have nothing that isn’t full of curse words and fact checking to say here.

"What are you going to bring James?" Abbi asked.

This sentence is put so Abbi looks like she’s asking if James is going to bring himself without the comma after the word ‘bring.’ Did Onion really not edit his book at all? These are simple and fixable grammatical mistakes.

It was amazing hearing my name pass her lips but I had no time to think, if I didn't respond right away she would think I was totally awkward. "I... have no idea..." I responded. Smiling she said, "I'm going to bring my hamster cage", I asked, "Did he die or something?" she laughed, "No, I never got one, the cage was just a gift from my dad."

But you’re supposed to cut it up.

Hamster cages are made of metal.

Does Abbi just have superhuman strength? Is she going to bring a pair of bolt cutters?

"Your dad didn't get you a hamster... for the cage?" I asked.

My question exactly.

Sometimes you just...

You just gotta give your daughter a hamster cage but no hamster.

She paused and started to lose her smile.

Oh fabulous, she’s one of those characters.

At the first sign of her smile fading I felt a crushing pressure in my chest. "Hopefully you can find something that will work with that," she said. I couldn't help but feel like a total jerk despite not even knowing what I did wrong.

That interaction was so... Weird? Robotic? i don’t know. Something felt wrong about it.

I had the overwhelming urge to fix how she felt so I took a gamble, "Well, I could always bring that weird vibrating thing my mom hides in her drawers all wrapped up in a cloth" I said.

What is wrong with you?

I cannot fathom what made Onion think this joke was funny.

She busted out laughing hysterically as a huge grinned filled my face. I was so happy I could get her to smile again. "Eeew! James!" she continued to laugh as the extent of my grin began to stress my cheeks. I couldn't remember a time when I was this obvious about how I felt.

This... Something is wrong with just... all the dialogue.

And with the formatting. You make a new paragraph when someone starts talking. A 34 year old man should know this. He writes like me when I first started writing, and while this probably means he just started writing, I was 11 years old when I wrote like this.

He is a 34 year old adult. There is no excuse for how bad this formatting and how generally terribly written these interactions are.

Abbi's laughing trailed off and she paused. Turning to me she said, "You... you didn't actu- ally... your moms?"

*Pained groaning.*

I responded, "No, I wouldn't know about that, but I'm glad it made you laugh." She responded, returning to a soft laugh "You're more goofy than I thought James." I sat next to her looking at my fingers interlaced in front of me; my wide smile relaxed but still filled my cheeks with warmth.

This entire chapter, everything here, is so awkwardly written.

As class came to a close Abbi patted me on my arm. I turned and she handed me a note. Instinctively I put it in my pocket and said "See ya tomorrow", she just smiled and walked away.

????

On my way to my next class, I opened the note. I didn't understand why, but it read "NISEONE."

Not knowing what to make of it and with little time, I stuffed it back in my pocket to look over later.

Yeah, that’s cryptic as hell.

Not feeling like skating home,

Oh, we’re really getting into edgy 2000′s shit now.

I got on the bus to see all the normal rejects and misfits waiting. Davis, a short and scrawny kid who had been my best friend since middle school despite being one grade behind me excitedly waved me over.

Oh, good, more terrible characters.

"James! Nice to seeeee you!"

Oh, this bitch needs to die.

he said in seemingly the dorkiest way possible. I smiled as he stood up giving me the window seat, knowing very well by then that I preferred it.

Um. Okay.

As I sat down I began looking out the window, analyzing the little humans running left and right to get on their busses.

Buses*

And I am going to eventually kick your ass for this pretentious bullshit.

Something reached out and caught the corner of my eye. I immediately shifted my head to see what it was and quickly realized it was Abbi standing in the parking lot by some beat-up sedan.

"What'cha looking at James?" Davis asked. Without hesitation I began to respond, "Oh, it's Abbi, she's in my art..." my heart sank as I witnessed a boy I barely knew, named Seth, walk up and kiss Abbi on the lips.

Oh, boo fucking hoo. Get over the fact that she has a life outside of your crush on her.

"James?" Davis said, but by that point his voice was a faint echo in the darkness my mind instantaneously lost itself in. I felt like after a life of numbness I was finally about to truly feel warmth for the first time only to have it all taken away in an instant, leaving me hopeless in the shadows, alone once again.

Cry me a goddamn river.

You angsty pretentious idiot.

Don’t give me angsty word salad about how sad this makes you, I don’t actually care at all.

I looked down at my knees feeling as if I lost all muscle control in my neck.

That isn’t a thing that happens ever when someone is upset.

"Are... you ok?" Davis asked. I responded with hesitation "...I'm... just stupid."

You spoke to her once, you fucking dumbass.

"No you're not. You're one of the coolest guys I know!" Davis replied. I continued my silence as he offered words of encouragement. "Okie dokie, well, you're awesome and should be super happy so if you want to talk, I'm your buddy so... so I'm here to talk."

That’s uh, nice of him.

But the way he’s talking sounds like... almost mechanical? All he’s done since he was introduced has been compliment James.

I was too focused on the con- flict raging in my mind to hear anyone at that point. I couldn't think about anything but Seth kissing Abbi the entire trip home.

Oh, get the fuck over it.

That night my mom was literally just serving lentil beans she prepared on her crock-pot for the billionth time, a fair exaggeration but still, it was excessive to say the least. My sister was behaving as she usually did at the dinner table, talking about how stupid she thought school was and how she couldn't wait for college. "How was work mom?"

I mean, I’m also tired of high school. I’m really done with judge-y teenagers.

I asked trying to keep my mind off the haunting images looping in my mind.

YOU HAVE HAD ONE FUCKING CONVERSATION WITH HER. CRY ME A FUCKING RIVER, YOU BITCH.

Any normal person would express disappointment over the fact that a person they like has a boyfriend or girlfriend or partner in general, not go into a damn depression about it.

"Well, no one at work respects me or listens to me and I generally can't stand it, but you know, we still have food on the table" she said in a stern tone.

That

That is weirdly passive aggressive and mechanical.

My sister barked as food flew out of her mouth, "Well at least it's not high school. I'm learning how to be a successful person from a bunch of low-income losers."

Oh, I guess bitching runs in the family.

My mom replied "Whatever your teachers are, they have full-time jobs, which is more than a lot of people can say." My mom gave my sister Lisa a disap- pointed look. Lisa was well known for showing little respect for hard-working people. To her it didn't matter how much you gave back to society, it only mattered how much money you made.

That’s a very black and white way to look at things.

After the rerun of lentil soup I washed the dishes per my mom's orders and headed to the shower. I sat on the floor of the tub thinking about Abbi, barely feeling the water as it hit my chest.

Sat on the floor... while water hits your chest? Are you like sitting with your back arched so the water can hit your chest?

This imagery is so odd.

I was so consumed with what I had seen that I had completely forgotten the note until that moment. I quickly reached over to my pants resting on the toilette.

Why the fuck did you spell toilet like that?

That’s literally the word for ‘toilet’ but in French. It isn’t a spelling used in English. It just makes you sound even more pretentious.

Also, he reached over to the toilet to grab the note from his pants while he’s in the shower?

It’s gonna get wet, you idiot.

I had hoped I read it wrong the first time and that it would make sense with a second look only to see it read exactly what I gathered in my initial passing glance. "NISEONE"

I fucking hate you, Onion.

This literally looks like you scrambled your screen name up.

Die.

In a fire.

I mumbled to myself. I joked with the idea in my head that she handed me the wrong note but still assumed it wasn't a failed attempt to say "Nice one," which could be taken as a compliment if you were desperate enough.

That joke, while just a little funnier, is still fucking lame.

Seconds into looking at the note my eyes widened, having figured out what it meant, I jumped up slipping to my feet and screamed "YEAH!!!" I had cracked it, only to immediately after feel completely stupid for not having figured it out sooner.

I’m just done functioning.

My mom screamed through the door from her bedroom "WHAT?" I responded "Sorry! Nothing!" I hurried to finish showering.

I’d just assume he got really into jerking off.

I’ll see myself out.

Staring at my phone wearing only a towel, I smiled as I typed in "NISEONE" or "647-3663" into the number keys.

That is the most cryptic and strange way to give someone your phone number.

I assumed we shared the same area code otherwise she likely would have given me a longer sequence of letters and I was right. After two rings I got an answer. "What do you want?" a disgruntled man's voice asked.

This... This girl gave this guy a home phone number?

I guess that’s fine since this is probably set in the early 2000′s, but it’s still odd.

Like a bad engine struggling to start in a monster movie I clumsily belted out a response "I... uh... I was looking for..." An unenthusiastic female voice in the background said, "Give me the phone." "Whatever" he said dropping phone in front of her.

James can apparently see through the phone, or he wouldn’t know that probably Abbi’s dad did this.

"Hello?" I could recognize the voice now it was Abbi.

Trying to hide my excitement by maintaining a normal tone I said, "This is James." Abbi excitedly screamed

Like how girls screamed in Disney Channel shows?

That’s ridiculous.

and responded "Oh my god you figured it out!" Hearing her optimistic tone I laughed saying, "So... why..." She interrupted. "I was hoping to find out if you figured out what you're bringing to art class."

Why the hell didn’t you just fucking ask? Or give him your regular phone number? This is just unnecessarily complicated.

I said "Oh!" and looked quickly around my room. I couldn't see anything immediately so I just said, "I'll... surprise you!" She then replied "Oh come on, tell me." My eyes locked on to a plausible item for the project. "How about my... bear... I'll bring my bear!"

You’re okay with destroying a teddy bear? Okay, I guess.

I said. She replied "Oh, ok, oh! I have an idea. Instead of the cage, I'll bring in a stuffed animal of mine and we'll make like, a zombie bear."

Sounds fine.

I don’t care.

You guys are fucking boring.

I laughed "Awesome" I said. "Ok, I'll see you tomorrow ok?" she replied happily. I answered "Ok, byeee."

I would appreciate it if you would fuck off.

I can’t believe this shit is on GoodReads.

Just before she hung up I could still hear her laughing, leaving me with a sense of accomplishment and a lasting smile as if it were painted across my face.

That’s the end of chapter one?

Oh god, okay.

That was.

Terrible.

The characters are bland and flavorless and I cannot get attached to any of them. I can already tell I’m going to completely despise this.

I’ll see you next time. I need to go think about my life.

~Kat

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onision-is-bad · 6 years ago

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Reaper’s Creek - Chapter 1

I currently only have access to the first five chapters of Reaper's Creek, so we'll see if I manage to find the whole book. My formatting for these reviews will be a quick overview, a cut, a few notable quotes, and then some writing advice.

Overview:

He has a huge issue with punctuation.

His writing is so self-absorbed that he doesn’t explain anything clearly.

He is so anti-religion and yet gives no real reasons.

He really seems to hate his sister. He calls her fat and annoying more than once.

His idea of aging people is odd. He states that most people in their 40s and above look like they are about to get diabetes. The irony is strong here, my friends.

He cannot write dialogue properly to save his life.

He likes to pretend to be an emo child.

The chapter is only like 6 pages long.

On to the quotes!

"Everyone seems so worried about what their ex would do with their money as if they are a completely different person than who they originally fell in love with." Greg doesn’t seem to understand that people change over time. The person you originally fell in love with IS NOT the person you break up with. PEOPLE CHANGE. Get over it.

"Everyone smiles, everyone is doing something… going somewhere.[…]I see past them showing off their pearly ivory teeth every time they see me." So he was discussing Christians here. This was his criticism of them. Is having white teeth so bad? He is so angry at Christians and gives no textual reason why. Daniel, as a character, is unreasonably detached and angry.

"Walking outside, my step dad is working on making another bed with his bare hands. […] Where would I be going to bed without the contraption he made for me? In the bathroom? Or maybe we'd just hang a blanket from the ceiling in our little wooden front room." Aside from the grammatical mistakes, it’s important to note that the bed Daniel supposedly sleeps from is suspended from the ceiling by chains. Is he a weird anthropomorphic bat?

"Stepping across the wood floor my mom painted white as a result of our pets peeing on our former carpet till it was unbearable to have around […]" This is only part of a sentence, but there are two issues with just this. Firstly, pets peeing on the floor until it is unbearable to look at is disgusting. How unsanitary is his house? Secondly, this sentence makes no sense. His mom painted the WOOD floor because the CARPET was removed? Why did she paint the wood floor? Wouldn’t it be new if you replaced the carpet? I have no idea where he was going with this detail.

"Time for my favorite part, pouring hydrogen peroxide on my wound and watching the science project explode in front of me." This is disgusting. Also, nice job trying to sound smart by saying “hydrogen peroxide” instead of “rubbing alcohol.”

Writing Advice:

Onision has issues with the following:

Dialogue

Punctuation

Capitalization (Just capitalize proper nouns, y’all.)

Compound Words (”Jellyfish” and “stepdad” are not two words, Greg.)

Descriptions

Word Repetition

Sentence Structure

Paragraph Formatting and Breaks

So how should these kinds of issues be fixed?

Punctuation

Punctuation can be kind of complicated. The two major issues Onision has are commas and ellipses, so we’ll just focus on those. (If you want tips on other kinds of punctuation, message me! I’m glad to help!) Right. So, commas. Commas have lots of uses, but we’ll just focus on two that are very common. The first is commas after introductory clauses. Here’s a sample sentence:

After the rain, the moss was moist.

The sentence could also be, “The moss was moist after the rain.” This is because the clause at the beginning was a prepositional phrase and can be placed at the end of the sentence is a grammatically correct fashion. At the beginning of a sentence, however, this clause needs a comma after it.

The second use of commas is when you have a compound sentence, which basically means two sentences in one. Here’s another sample sentence:

The rain was over, and the moss was moist.

It could be two sentences, but they’re connected with a comma and the word “and.” The general rule for commas is that they go where you pause to take a breath or where the sentence is compounded. Otherwise, they really should be avoided unless you know what you’re doing. Again, commas are really complicated, so I know I’m not doing them justice here.

He also has issues with ellipses, the “...” punctuation. The issue is that he uses them so often. They really shouldn’t be used all in formal writing, but fiction really blurs the lines between formal and informal writing. Ellipses are sort of annoying when reading, and when used a lot, they lose their power as a sign of thought or suspense.

Dialogue and Paragraphs

I’m combining these two into one handy writing tip called TiPToP. TiPToP is where you have to break the paragraph.

Time change - a new time or a time jump

Place change - a new setting

Topic shift - a new line of discussion

Person shift - a new perspective or a new person talking

Sentence Structure and Word Repetition

Onision has SO MANY issues with sentence structure and word repetition. To fix these kinds of issues, I recommend both revising and letting someone read your work and give feedback. It’s really hard to separate yourself from your writing, but it’s necessary to do in order to find the best possible way of conveying your points. Sometimes, as the author, it is difficult to see where readers can be tripped up in your writing. Try to make sure you are as clear as possible. Pretend you’re reading something written by someone else. Try to picture what the sentence is conveying. If it isn’t clear, rewrite it!

(This is a very nuanced topic, so the above paragraph is VERY vague. If you want more information about the topic, just let me know.)

Descriptions

As an author, you know exactly what you want readers to see when they read your work, and it is, therefore, your responsibility to adequately describe your vision. Adjectives are your friends. Adverbs are your friends. Helping verbs usually are not your friends. Saying something like “He had jumped over the log,” doesn’t need the word “had.” “Have” and “had” are helping verbs, so always check if your sentence needs them in order to make sense. Extra words clog up your descriptions For more in-depth descriptions, try to answer these questions:

Who?

What?

Where?

When?

Why?

How?

During dialogue, try to add what the character is actively doing. Are they standing still? Running? Maybe they’re watching something? Here is a super quick sample of what that kind of dialogue looks like:

“Charon, if I lose my arm, I only have myself to blame,” Makoa said.

Charon pinched the bridge of his nose. “Why are you doing this?” he asked.

Makoa grinned, “I just wanna see what happens.”

He fired the weapon. It made a strange, squishing sound, and then a massive glob of goo went flying at high speed towards the wall.

“Holy shit!” Charon exclaimed.

Makoa laughed. “I can’t believe my arm is still attached!”

Anyways, that’s it for this review! If you enjoyed it, I’d appreciate a like and maybe a reblog! I spent way too much time on this, but it was a fun break!

I’d love feedback, so feel free to interact with these reviews!

#onision #anti #anti onision #book #reapers creek #chapter 1 #writing help

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onisionhurtspeople · 6 years ago

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The Cycle of Self-Victimization: Onision Style

Greg has an extremely predictable cycle that he likes to engage in when he gets a lot of backlash from the shit that he chooses to say on YouTube and Twitter. He’s in the middle of the most dramatic iteration of this behavior yet, so I figured I’d write a little post outlining it just for keks.

1. Say something offensive/attack someone who isn't deserving of it --->

2. Huge community backlash (especially when he picks on someone who has enough clout to fight back for once (instead of random fans), like Shane Dawson, Blaire White, or Jaclyn Glenn) --->

3. Double down on ignorant/harmful opinion --->

4. Furor starts to die down -OR- get worse --->

5. Greg begins to act like a victim to evoke sympathy/evade criticism (because he's ~depressed~ and now all of a sudden you're attacking a depressed person, what kind of a monster are you??) --->

6. Continues acting like a victim until the whole issue blows over --->

7. Pretends he's going to change/Be tHe BeSt SeLf hE CaN bE/~think positive!~ ---> pretend to have seen the light and undergone a genuine change for a couple of days --->

8. Once he realizes that his last blow-up has lost him a ton of fans, he rapidly decompensates into his usual negative/toxic behavior --->

9. Begins attacking people again to get attention --->

10. Start all over again from step #1.

Currently, Greg is right in the middle of step #6, acting like a victim until the whole thing blows over and he can assess the damage. What’s different about this time (and the reason why he’s decompensating so rapidly right now compared to previous patterns) is because almost all of this is happening at the exact same time, and there’s no lull or resting period in between these cycles like there have been in past years.

His fan base has had enough and is sick of defending him, the entire Internet knows what kind of a person he is at this point (thanks to Billie, who knocked over the first domino), he’s about to get reamed by the government and the IRS for well over 500k (which will take everything he has left), he’s trapped in a loveless marriage with a person that he isn’t attracted to and kids he doesn’t want to raise or be responsible for, and his increasing age and lowered income and sphere of influence have severely hampered his ability to attract the type of young alternative teen girl lovers that he’s actually attracted to, like Billie, Jaclyn Glenn, or Shiloh. He’s frittered away his entire multi-million dollar fortune on meaningless materialistic pursuits, like the ~$3000 worth of clothes, tattoos, tech, games, and makeup that Lainey has purchased in the past two months alone (and that isn’t even including upcoming Christmas expenditures, or Lainey’s recent posts and videos detailing her plans to throw away all of her clothes in order to buy new ones - yes, even the ones she just bought this month). His career is on its last legs, and at 33 years old, he has no bankable skills that he can use to get a real job because he never bothered looking into ways to supplement his income when YouTube was inevitably incapable of sustaining his lifestyle any longer; and even if he could, Greg is too much of a raging narcissist to be capable of not challenging the structure and hierarchy of any company that hired him. His wife won’t let him bring other women into their household or marriage anymore - gone are the days when he could simply whip up some manipulative language for plausible deniability later on, such as “I wouldn’t do anything that a friend wouldn’t do” - she knows his game now, and she’s having none of it. He wants to move on to a younger, hotter, more pliable teenage girl like Jessie Paege, but Lainey is saving her entire YouTube income to pay off his IRS debt (and whatever he owes after Shane Dawson (hopefully) sues him); he can’t just discard her and move on like he’s done with other exes before, he has too much to lose from it this time. He’s gone from owning two houses (one of which was a mansion) and two cars (one of which was a Tesla) to just one used truck and one three-bedroom house in the middle of a swamp. He used to make nearly $5000 a month from his 1200 fans on Patreon; now he makes $2600 a month from just over 600 of them, and those numbers are dwindling further every single month. And the best part is that he did all of this to himself.

It’s no wonder that Greg has been stuck at some point in this cycle for the past three months straight. He’s dug himself into a hole so deep that not even the tree the IRS is about to charge him 100k to re-plant is tall enough to help him climb out of it. And I have to say - in all my years of watching Greg, observing him, analyzing his behavior, and hoping that he’d eventually take himself out of the game in exactly the way that he currently is - I NEVER thought that he had the capacity to sabotage himself to this extreme. What a wonderful Christmas present.

#onision #npd #narcissism #laineybot

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tearsforonion · 6 years ago

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I watched the whole shane dawson documentary

Here’s a summary so you never have to watch this video:

(As of now i am not trying to give my opinion, only showing what he said and what he showed in the video. If I have the energy for it, i will make a second post showing my overall opinions)

FIRST FIVE MINUTES:

• In text with no music he shows on the screen that Shane Dawson believes that being a youtuber was “Just his job” and greg says that he would never think of his audience as “just a job”

• Shane exaggerated and says “onision talks about me in every video” and onision debunks an EXAGGERATION

• Onision talks about his collab with shane and then talks about the kiss with shane for about 5 minutes of the video

MINUTE 6:

• He then talks about the out of context video that came out almost a year ago where shane was making bad jokes about a child being “sexy”

• Talks about how uncomfortable the cohost was (which shane said in his video his whole goal was to make the cohost uncomfortable and shocked but onion never pointed that out)

• “shane dawson COULD BE joking”

MINUTE 13:

• Talks about how shane flew a 13 year old musician to his house for a video and says “well if i did that many people would want to have me arrested!!”

• Talks about shane hiring a child actor to play his son. Says there’s nothing wrong with it by itself but “knowing that shane could be a potential predator, this could be seen as inappropriate”

MINUTE 15:

• Brings up clips from other accused child molesters and compares it to shane dawson’s apology video

MINUTE 19:

• Says shane never addressed the things that people were saying wasn’t appropriate

• Says he doesn’t know why shane is surprised that people were calling him out as a pedophile

• Shows a clip from 8+ years ago where shane made a joke with his cousin by saying “now shake your titties” and telling her to eat a hotdog

• compares shane dawson’s apology to other accused rapists/child molesters videos

• Says “this does NOT make shane guilty, it just shows a man who has said that he is attracted to children whether or not it was a joke”

• Shows shane telling people that he was molested as a child and then supports shane and says that people who have been molested are not always child molesters.

MINUTE 22:

• Shane says that people should be focusing on the real issues: hollywood stars being able to keep their jobs after getting arrested for real proof of being molesters/rapists. Onision then goes to say that shane is projecting the blame onto other guilty people.

• Says that shane condemning his own behavior from 6 years ago was the smart thing to do from a business perspective but shane might not actually mean what he is saying

• Basically says for a good 6-7 minutes that shane is playing the victim card over and over again

MINUTE 26:

• Greg talks about his father being a molester and compares what shane is saying to what his father would say

• Shows a clip from Ethan’s (H3H3) Podcast from Feb 2018 saying that shane still makes the same jokes as he did back in 2012

MINUTE 28:

• Pulls our a google article titled “20 Most Common Manipulation Techniques Used By Predators” and checks off each one as shane’s apology video progresses (This goes on almost the rest of the video but onision also adds clips of other things that shane has said in the middle of these points)

MINUTE 29:

• Shane makes a video this year about how on youtube you could search up something called “webcam kids” and see a bunch of kids on webcams with pedophiles in the comments getting pleasure off of it.

• Greg says that “he doesn’t have time to search naked babies but he has time to search up webcam kids for a video”

• (Keep in mind this was one of Shane’s “conspiracy videos” and his whole objective was to point out how easy it was to find these kids on youtube but when onision pointed it out, he took the same video from 8+ years ago and threw it back in his face in minute 41)

MINUTE 34:

• Greg watching the apology video and checking off on the article of different manipulation tactics that shane used

• Says you should not fly a 14 year old girl to work with him and then says “IM TALKING ABOUT PEOPLE WHO ARENT LEGAL IN YOUR STATE”

• He then goes on to defend his relationship with lainey (being 17 at the time) and says by the time he found out she was 17 he “already fell for her” and are “happily married for 6 years” (OK)

• Says shane focuses way too much on a 10 second clip of them saying that his boyfriend and exes had baby faces instead of actual criticism

• Says “Theres not much evidence that he isnt a pedophile but there’s a lot of evidence that he MIGHT be”

MINUTE 43:

• Shows a clip of shane supporting an anti-child porn company and saying “why would someone be so passionate about this topic while being a person like that as well??”

• Implies that shane might be compensating for being a pedophile himself

• Shows an article of an anti-pedo organization where the founder was a pedophile himself.

• Then goes on to say that this doesn’t make shane guilty

• Shows a clip where shane said he lost many brand deals over the whole thing and then greg points out how much money shane makes and showing his net worth

• Says that shane misrepresents himself and constantly plays the victim

• Asks why shane would delete a controversial video of him twerking in front of children after the accusations came out of him being a pedophile.

MINUTE 46:

• Says that shane is distracting the point by him saying that he didn’t sleep with a child. (Clip from podcast with ethan)

• Says shane is just some first world white guy worth millions trying to preserve his lifestyle

• Says that what shane is saying reminds him of “guys being afraid of the #MeToo movement”

• Shane says that something that happened to him could happen to anyone (meaning that people could take clips from 6 years ago and make it into something much worse than it is) and onision basically says over and over again that it cannot happen to anyone (should we make one of onision in order to contradict his point guys???)

• Points out that Ethan is just another rich guy who is defending another rich guy.

MINUTE 48:

• Shows text with no music (again) and defends himself for rating underage girls (again)

• Says that the people he called beautiful doesn’t look like a child therefore it’s ridiculous that people would go after him for something like that

• Shows a clip where someone edited him saying “Hi i’m onision and i am a pedophile” with illuminati music over it

• Shows the podcast again and says that shane saying “why would someone get arrested for googling naked babies” was not a joking tone and says shane was being genuine when asking these questions.

• Says he’s not slandering shane he’s only “presenting everything he could find on the topic”

• Says that any judge would look at these clips and agree with onision.

• says he would never trust shane dawson around any kids

• Says people are going to rip him apart for the video and says the world isn’t fair

• Ends it by thanking his patreons

#onision #anti onision #onision hate #anti o #anti onion #antionision #onion #debate #shane dawson #shane

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cececils · 7 years ago

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So going under his tag on tumblr after not watching him for a year i decided to finally say how i feel about onision because it’s the internet and im allowed to put in my input on why i unsubbed and stayed away from Greg.

So i was about 14~ when i first subscribed to him, i was young and he seemed to be funny to me and he liked anime and had views i could kinda of agree with, and he loved Andy and at the time i was OBSESSED with Black Veil Brides. I was learning to except myself as trans and even till today i dont like republicans so those videos were funny to me too. but then as i kept watching him and grew older i realized some things were off.

1.) His idea of being superior to everyone else because he’s vegan. Listen im vegan too more because i have no choice im lactose intolerant, eating meat makes me sick something to do with my body rejecting the bacteria, and im allergic to eggs. I literally have no choice. I have non vegan and vegan friends. But not once do i tell my friends that theyre dumb and shit for eating meat. Their lifestyle their choice hell if i could without getting sick id love to eat a cheeseburger again in my life. But watching his videos i got off put on how superior he made himself to others over a diet choice for someone in his thirties im just so surprised he wastes his time on that dont tell people they are wrong for wanting to not be vegan?

2.) Riding on the last point how he treats medically obese people is terrible. It’s one thing to be concerned for people’s health but dont sit there and make fun of them. My aunt had a thyroid problem and it makes her overweight and she works her hella hardest to lose weight but she just cant, she is vegan and works out when she’s not at work or trying to get some sleep but she’s still overweight. I’d hate for him to make fun of someone like her when he has no place to that and i remember him saying something about muffin tops and honestly? He has no place there, we all cant be small like Taylor.

3.) His and Taylor’s relationship. They’ve denied he’s abusive but at the same time they’ve admitted to so much shit happening between them.Their age when they first started dating is already a problem and the whole thing with Billie was the shittiest excuse for a poly relationship i’ve ever seen. As someone who is poly i have to say that was so bad. And as a side note i used to be subscribed to Taylor too because i was so happy to find an agender youtuber! But they try being a kid and it is giving us such a bad rep they want sympathy for something they can leave my mom did with four kids it was hard but you absolutely can leave and they do have chances to with safety, not only that but Greg was in every video of hers i clicked on and it made it seem like he either had to be in the spotlight or she wasnt allowed to make a video alone. :/

4.) His harassment of other youtubers. Stop making videos about Social Repose, stop talking about Eugenia , leave Shane alone and mos importantly LEAVE DAN ALONE. I dont like the first two just because they arent my type pf youtuber, my partner likes Shane but im ok with him, im subscribed to his boyfriend though, but i feel bad for Dan it literally made me uncomfortable how he talked about Dan and now looking back how he talked about Andy wasn't any better.

5.) He made so many videos with the title just saying he was quitting youtube but he’s still there?

6.) It really made me feel like shit when his early videos and even the last ones i seen was him saying his fans basically were shit and he was the best and if we didnt like it then we could leave, but then as people left he got pissed? Im sorry but you are catering to the masses as your job and so if you want to keep making money then dont tell the masses you basically hate them.

7.) Im turning 17 soon so i look back and realize that the body rating was horrible. Not only would you make young girls hate their body by saying shit about their body that YOU dont like without saying like to not take your opinion seriously but like they were my age and the more i thought about it th more i realized how gross that is. Like im still under 18 and most of them are too i still dont want a grown man rating my body, and yes they turned it in but he is the adult he should say no because most were of noticeably young girls.

8.) Religion. Listen when i was younger i agreed with him on religion and im still an atheist but ill be damned they day i tell my friends praying for safety or something nie or giving me a prayer that they are wrong or dumb, thats what they believe in and even if i find it useless they think theyre doing a good thing for me and so why should i stop them?

9.) His kinks and bringing them forward. Listen you know you have kids watching and even then not everyone wants to see you in a diaper on Twitter. Dont talk about your daddy kink just dont. You’re thirty.

10.) Even the most recent picture on his Tumblr right now makes him look crazy af and honestly he reminds me of my dad when he was losing it before he died.

11.) Shitting on Walmart shoppers. It’s a store leave them be.

12.) Refusing to take criticism.

So thats what i had to say and what i could remember to say off the top of my head, thats why i stopped watching him not long after i turned 16. I used to support him so much but i just cant anymore, i agree with the basics of things he brings up like feminism but he’s such a bad and abusive person at the end of the day i really cant and just being curious about maybe resubscribing and then seeing what he’s up to and finding such bad shit i just cant. I was always afraid he’d put this in a video so i tried not to say anything but at this point maybe he could listen or maybe he’ll make a joke and keep going while not giving a shit. It’s his choice.

If you want to add on you absolutely can.

#onision #anti onision #laineybot #anti laineybot #onion boy #uhohbro

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ohnoonision · 7 years ago

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I don’t know, the Sam drama is just boring to me. It is the same story again and again with the people they bring into their house. Taylor, Greg, and Sam keep bringing it up. I don’t care about it. I really don’t like Sam and I don’t see her as much as a “victim” as Maya, Billie, etc. I think they were all in the wrong and were all terrible to each other, and I do feel that Sam did just want to be with Greg, considering all the digs she made at Taylor. What I do like about the situation, though, is that it has solidified what "haters” have been saying all along about Greg and Taylor. It has been a big motivator for their many of their remaining fans to ditch them. It is getting to the point where Greg isn’t even worth talking about unless something big happens. Their fans quickly figure out who they are now because it isn’t hidden as much. The tracks left behind of the shitty behavior can’t really be hidden anymore. The attempts at rewriting history are easily seen through. Onision and Laineybot are never going to regain anything at this point. They can’t do anything to stop the decline in fans now, at this point. This is why I haven’t been really active anymore on here, as well, because there isn’t really anymore I can say that isn’t obvious. Plus, I’m really busy with my family and life in general. Maybe if something really serious comes down, like a big exposure or scandal, I may become more active. But right now there are so many active Anti-O’s, and then there is lolcow and kiwifarms, there are discords, and an abundance of Anti-O YouTubers. I am proud that we have successfully got him off Twitter and Tumblr. He is afraid to post because he can’t handle the criticisms and defeat, and he knows that is pretty much all that is left for him on these sites. And with his frequent misuses of Patreon, in time he is probably going to lose that, too. Greg has lost. It is clear.

#onision #antionision #laineybot #onision drama #onisiondrama #anti onision

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anti-onion-posts · 7 years ago

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Onision and Narcissism

Prepare yourselves, this is long.

At the end of this it seems as if I am being sympathetic towards Onision, in a way I am but he is still a garbage human being in my opinion.

When it comes to Narcissistic personality disorder (NPD) like every other psychological disorder there are certain criteria that need to be filled for an individual to be diagnosed.

10-13% of the general population have some form of a personality disorder as suggested by a study done by Weissman (1993), these people can merge into the general population. Most have more than two personalities disorders. There are three clusters when it comes to PD's, Cluster A - odd and eccentric, B - attention seeking and selfish and C - anxious and fearful. Narcissistic personality disorder falls under cluster B - attention seeking and selfish.

Traits of NPD:

· Has a grandiose sense of self-importance.

· Preoccupied with fantasies; success, beauty, power or love

· Believes that they are unique and can only be understood or/and associate with others that have a high status.

· Needs to feel excessive admiration; they will fish for compliments and will be highly susceptible to forms of flattery.

· Feels entitlement.

· Interpersonally exploitative; they will use others to achieve their goals.

· Lacks empathy; they are either unwilling or unable to recognize or identify with others feelings.

· Envious of others or believe that other people are envious of them.

· Arrogant and shows rude and abusive behaviours and/or attitudes.

Now, I touched upon something on one of my firsts posts which is something I’d like to go in more detail about.

Onision is what I like to call an insecure narcissist.

Recently there has been some advances in clinical and empirical studies for NPD which recognized that narcissism can be co-occurring with vulnerability; inferiority, insecurity, etc.

(Note: Personally, I believe that an insecure narcissist can be/is more dangerous than an individual with NPD. Unfortunately, it is hard to back up this claim as research in this area is hard to come by.)

Let’s have a look at some of these traits and how easily it is to tie them to Onision.

Criticism

When it comes to criticism or anything that is remotely assumed to be an interpreted as negative whenever that be evaluating personality, performance and behaviour. Individuals with NPD will be highly reactive to it.

Even if it is constructive criticism.

Why?

From this they will be forced to come to terms with admitting some form of vulnerability and in return they will act defensively. Whenever that be through attempting to falsify evidence, lying, attempting to change the subject or respond to it in a way that they have been asked something that is not relating to the subject.

The ability to accept criticism comes from how secure we feel as a person as well as our resilience.

‘’But aren’t narcissistic secure? They have huge egos.’’

That would be correct, yes, however their ego maybe oversized and/or artificially inflated this can’t be viewed as being either secure or resilient. It can be very easily punctured so when they are criticised they show themselves to be poorly incapable of holding any emotional poise and receptivity.

(Receptivity: able or quick to receive knowledge, ideas.)

However, despite not being able to accept criticism they will demonstrate an abnormally developed capacity to criticize others. There are two common terms that are using in psychoanalytical literature and these are; narcissistic injury and narcissistic rage.

Injury:

Results from childhood; deficient parents not being able to nurture them. They don’t feel parents love which is prerequisite when it comes to self-love. Meaning that a parent’s love is needed to build a basic understanding of what ‘love’ is.

Therefore, they need to contently prove themselves by claiming superiority over others by doing this it can condition them to feel as if they are ‘good enough’ to be loved. In return this simply in time alienate them.

(Just as a note, not all children will react in this way not every child with bad parents will grow to become narcissists.)

This is also the same when it comes to rejection and we all know that Onision doesn’t handle rejection well. An example of this would be when Shane Dawson refused to collab with him it’s was insulting to him, and he took it extremely personally. ''How dare this person not want to work with me'' easily translates into, ''How dare this person reject me?''

Watch his video he made on his patrons leaving after his comments on the Manchester bombings, them taking away their pledge to him = them rejecting him.

Rage:

Due to being incredibly sensitive to criticism as this can bring feelings of anxiety, so to safeguard themselves they will react with defiance or with verbal violence. This is narcissistic rage.

They go to great lengths to invalidate the person criticising them; to achieve such dismissal of the individual criticising them, they'll do everything possible to negate their viewpoint. And this can include much more than blaming or challenging them.

‘’You did this wrong.’’

‘’Show me, show me the evidence of what I did wrong. Oh, you don’t have evidence on you? Well you are the one who is wrong, not me.’’

Narcissists are prone to these rages and will sacrifice others for personal gain - His multiple videos on Billie which ultimately lead to her public humiliation, so he could have something to talk about in his YouTube videos. He sacrificed her confidential information, so he could get monetary gain.

Check out his video when it came to him reading his book reviews he couldn't handle the negative criticisms that was left. He will deflect, and he will divert until he can escape that feeling, that notion that everyone gets when they are rejected. This leads to the second stage of his psychosis; The superiority complex, which is an extreme defence mechanism to remove himself of all criticism and responsibility while pinning it on others.

It's the ''It's not my fault, they're stupid because they don't understand, no it's not me, right?''

When their position has been exposed as false they will become evasive and articulate lies or half-truths and will flat out contradict themselves (sound like someone we know?) this can be to such a degree that it can leave the people watching this happen sit back in disbelief.

A big cause for the feelings of anger and rage in a moment is that they will externalise the more painful anxiety or shame related emotions. They will feel these types of emotions, or remembering a time in the past where they have been humiliated and transfer these unwanted feelings to another.

‘’I’m not stupid, you are!’’

‘’You can’t say I have NPD, are you a doctor? No? Exactly, stupid.’’

If the individual that the rage is aimed at has no idea why the outburst took place a sudden explosion of this rage will more than likely leave them feeling confused and maybe even frightened to express their opinion again.

Low self-esteem

Being constantly driven to prove themselves to both the people around them and them, this leads to a low self-esteem. This is the self-doubting and recessive part of them and they try hard to make sure that it is well hidden from sight. Once again this is coming with the feeling of fear of inferiority.

They will use many defence mechanisms to hide this:

· Posturing exceptionally high self-esteem.

· Fishing for compliments.

· Bragging about their (exaggerated) achievements.

The ‘misunderstood special person’ which include notions such as:

· ‘’I’m special.’’

· ‘’I’m one of a kind.’’

· ‘’I’m ahead of my time.’’

· ‘’I’m so unique no one understands me.’’

· ‘’I’m so much smarter than everyone else.’’

These are coupled with the common traits of NPD and construct a superficial belief that they are exceptional and for insecure narcissists it creates a reassuring role a second skin that they can live in which hides their true self.

Self-righteous and defensive

Needing to protect an overblown but incredibly fragile ego their defense system can be very easy to set off. When they are challenged the survival depends on being right or justified instead of just admitting that they are wrong or apologising.

‘’Onision has apologised before!’’

Yes, yes, yes but look at the circumstances of the apology everything that Onision does is a strategic move even when it comes to apologising.

He will say something bad.

People will be outraged.

He defends what he said.

Loses subscribers/patrons = losing money.

Onision: ‘’Hey guys, I’m sorry for what I said.’’

He apologises when he needs to do damage control because he has been pushed to do so, not because he wants to genuinely apologise for what he said. This pulls back his fans into defending him again.

‘’Does anyone remember what he said about (X)?’’

‘’Yeah, but he apologised!’’

I will admit and say that this is a very smart strategy and it clearly works it’s just a shame that his fans don’t see this move; they don’t see that he uses them as his first line of defence when it comes to protecting himself from criticism.

Furthermore, individuals with NPD have a ‘my way or the highway’ attitude they are stubborn, completive and insistence that their point of view is correct coupled with their feeling of being self-righteous.

This is to hide their underlying doubts about not being good enough and the more self-righteous (mostly exaggerate and puffed up by themselves) they are the more they will feel endangered by a conflicting opinion.

Projecting

To hide that they are insecure they will redirect any unfavorable traits that they have to someone else. As they cannot deal with being imperfect as their emotional capability is underdeveloped.

Hint: Social repose.

Poor boundaries

They view people as objects that exist primarily to serve their own needs – putting their own needs in front of others as well, even their own children – this is known in literature as ‘narcissistic supplies’ since others are regarded to cater to their personal desires.

Their boundaries are unevenly developed and will prompt them to dominate in conversations where it is inappropriate and share intimate details about their life. Such as over sharing their private life and disclosing information that others wouldn’t; as what they are sharing would be humiliating.

Yet with insensitivity to how others will react to their words, they’re highly likely to blurt out things or even boast about them; even if it will be views as tasteless and/or offensive. To add on to this, they will often ask other questions that are far to person or intimate. Such situations can be particularly difficult for the other person if the narcissist is in a position of authority over them so that not responding could, practically, put them in some jeopardy.

Someone with NPD will share with pride how they have chewed someone out and expect the people around them to be impressed by what they have done.

Relationships

Narcissists have issues (or they are in able) when it comes to connecting with people; they will instead focus on something else whenever that be:

· Work

· Social networking

· Books

· Games

· Fantasies

During relationships though they will ‘set things up’ this is common in intimate relationships and if they are married they can be incredible hard on their spouse. They need to see themselves as perfect so when their spouse makes a mistake in that moment they will attempt to remove themselves from their partners and can be extremely unkind even brutal when they react to them.

Conclusion

When an individual with NPD has these defences, they will not grow as a human being and will not take responsibility for their lives. They are bound in a stagnate two-dimensional world where they only see black and white; grey areas do not exist.

They remain empty emotionally and lack the strength that would let them be genuinely vulnerable to others. There is a consent need to fill what they never had as a child, the relationships that they have when older show a strong level of detachment.

They are not free to change so Onision is a lost cause trying to change the way he thinks will never work. He is unable to change as he doesn’t want to be wrong, he can’t stand to be wrong. He is a text book case of a multiple of the cluster B personality disorders; displaying characteristics of Histrionic, Narcissistic and Borderline personality disorder.

He has a strong desire for attention and the continuous change in his persona - therefore he can't keep to an opinion and is often seen as a hypocrite - and his strong reactions to rejection is what leads him to a vicious cycle that deteriorate him as a person. I personally believe that he is afflicted with a mental disconnection, he is not aware of his illness and can't be made aware of it by normal means. He is emotionally dangerous to anyone that interacts with him. It is because of this mental disconnection is why when people mention that has some form of a mental disorder he defensively denies the claim. He is in this consent cycle and will never be a complete person.

Narcissists are victims but at the same time they are the perpetrator too.

Narcissists are made not born.

#anti onision #antionision #anti o #onision

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nutterwithasolderingiron · 4 years ago

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An open letter to YouTube. I get that you're trying to be hands off with algorithms but maybe stop being hands off to criticism of your platform and actually listen to users. I've had several problems with the algorithms with your platform for a while. When I've reported an issue, it's been ignored, when I've tried contacting you via twitter, it's been ignored, when I went on your Reddit, it gets deleted instantly. So here are some of my complaints.

1. Reaction channels. STOP RECOMMENDING THESE TO ME WHEN I WATCH ONE VIDEO. could it be if I watch a music video, I like that song? So why do you think it's a good idea to then spam me with "OMG JOE BALLSWEAT EPIC REACTION TO" then it's just mr. Ballsweat sitting there watching the video and maybe saying something like "wish" or "damn" every 30 seconds?

2. On the subject of reaction channels. How come old clips of bands playing on TV from the 00s gets taken down by the rights holders but all the reaction videos stays up? Even if Joe ballsweat isn't actually "transforming" "commenting" or "reviewing" the work?

3. If I am a fan of a YouTube channel, why are you so obsessed with the idea of trying to get me to watch videos attempting to cancel the youtuber or basically badmouthing them? I don't care what some wannabe commentary channel with 200 subs has to say about a youtuber I like since you know it's not going to be insightful, it's just going to be some dumb ass right wing snowflake saying "no, you're wrong" without actually addressing why.

4. Speaking of which. I know there was that internal document at YouTube trying to bury channels who would try to capitalize on drama (onision, leafy, gradea were mentioned in it) so why do I still get tons of drama channels recommended? Most the time I click "don't recommend this channel"

5. By the way. When I click "don't recommend this channel" I mean it. It does not mean "try again in 6 weeks" I can't tell you how many times I've said "I'm not interested in oasis" to the algorithm then getting oasis's channel recommended a few weeks later. At least 15 times but probably more.

6. If I say "I'm not interested in X band" don't keep recommending their videos but on a different channel. I don't like oasis, I don't like Paramore, I don't like primus, I don't like Radiohead, I don't like tool and I fucking hate the eagles. If I didn't like the official channels for them, why do you think id like the unofficial?

7. I'll admit, sometimes Ill see a video that looks interesting..... But let me give you a tip, if I only make it 5 mins into a 50 Min video, that usually means I wasn't into it. Maybe it was the production, the stance they took on a certain topic, maybe their personality was just horrible. I don't want to see you recommend the same channel over and over and over and over. If I liked them, I would have finished the video in the first place.

8. This one goes to both YouTube, advertisers and YouTubers. Stop with all the mid roll ads. You can usually tell the ones that were stuck on by companies or YouTube because it will cut out mid sentence and break the flow of the video but honestly, even to the YouTubers who put in excessive midrolls, it really breaks the flow of the video and makes me turn on adblocker.

Oh and here's one tip for YouTubers. I get you're trying to make YouTube your job..... I get that. You've seen the big names and thought "I can do that" but can I please ask that you stop making 10 mins videos that look like this.

1 unskippable ad, 30 seconds channel intro, 30 seconds of youtuber introducing themselves and telling you to like, subscribe, leave a comment and click the bell, then a 20-30 second plug for your merch store, then reminding your viewers to donate to your patreon if they like the video (which hasn't even really started) then a basic introduction to the topic they're going to be talking about, then a midroll ad, the then more in depth to the topic you're talking about, then another 20 second reminder to like, comment, subscribe and check out the merch store, then continue with the topic for like 2 mins, followed by a 45 second long as for raid shadow legends or some paid promotion, Then the ending to the topic of the video.... But the video still has 1 min left. Which is just going to be the youtuber saying "so that's my thoughts on the subject. So don't forget to like, comment, subscribe, ring the bell because it really helps out, thank you to our sponsors for sponsoring this video and remember, don't forget to check out our merch store,also don't forget to follow me on social media, also consider giving to my patreon"

If your video is 20%+ calls to action, paid sponsorships, self promotion and requests to check out your social media, I don't want to watch you. I know it helps with engagement and YouTubers need to make money to survive but got damn, it gets annoying...... Anyway, this rant is sponsored by audible

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jiyoungtrois · 8 years ago

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Finally Opening Up

@onision I know, this feels like beating a dead horse or otherwise dancing on its grave. The forum controversy feels like it’s been over forever for me. However, I finally wanted to speak up about why I had posted my photos on your forums when you had requested your fans to do so. My goal isn’t to outright attack you, it is simply to get you to realize how much power that you have over your fans and how damaging that it can become. I’m 15 now, and I believe that I was around thirteen when I was ecstatic to share my face-and as creepy as it sounds now-my body figure in order to seek validation. I blatantly refused to do any second thinking about my actions. And looking back I did it because I found you as a big aspiration to live up to. Now, I can’t recall if I had shown up in your videos and I can’t be bothered to sift through them at this point. But that doesn’t matter. What mattered was that in my mind I thought that I valued you as a person, and that you were this honest person, or so you said. I now look back and see that if I had seen myself being judged by you not so long ago, that if you even went as far to criticize the shape of my eyebrows maybe, it would’ve torn me apart. You retweet and reblog the statuses of people who have claimed you helped them. But this is because they would follow you to the ends of the earth. A few strong people cannot cover up that some were weak, but you do not reblog and apologize to those who took your words of an idol too far. You mocked them. Refused to remove videos that were then being used as weapons to mock and make fun of the weaker ones. I no longer follow you because I see now that you are no longer happy or that you’re act to appear happy can no longer be bought. I subscribed to your channel in 2012 because I saw you as this light of hope. You influenced my thoughts and behaviors because at the time I had just moved in with a new set of parents, who I felt like I could not be open to you. So your beliefs and morality influenced me easily. You showed to be happy but over not a long course of time you became negative. I was optimistic enough to keep on following you and that one day, you’d be a careless ball of joy that I had looked up to for so long once again. You had made the biggest impact on me because I had no one else to turn to. You can twist those words however you want, mock me for looking up to you, but the past isn’t something that you can change. I stopped following you because you’re bad vibes and the drama got worse and you let it run your channel. Thats why I stopped following you. I’m doing better now, and a big chunk of my mindset has changed or developed in some way. I know that I have a hell of a lot more growing up to do. There’s no denying that. If you don’t ever get to reading this, that’s okay. All in all, I just needed this to get off of my chest. If you ignore it, even better. But if you’ve gotten to the end of this overkill of a passage, I don’t want to cause you any harm. Or to tell you what to do. Because I have little power over an adult.

#onision #onision hate #onision drama #controvertial #mine #my story #long post #youtube #youtuber #looking back I made a freak ton of errors but I'm on mobile and it makes me feel paranoid

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onisiondrama · 6 years ago

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“Onision: Proven Honest/Innocent & No One Cares” Part 1

Speaks 4/14/19

This is my reaction to his recent video about Shiloh. Idk how many parts this will be or when I’ll be able to finish it.

The first thing I want to point out is he is trying to convince his audience that every criticism he’s gotten over the years about his relationship with Shiloh is now null because he was telling the truth all along. This video disproves nothing. Everyone knows Shiloh lied about a lot of shit and did fucked up shit during their relationship. That does not mean no one is allowed to criticize him for the fucked up things he did during the relationship.

The second thing I want to point out is he acts like his relationship with Shiloh was the root cause of ALL the criticism/hate he receives online because everyone believed Shiloh’s lies. This is 100% not true. Most people (fans and antis) really, really hated Shiloh at the end of their relationship and for years after they broke up. When they broke up, not very many people took Shiloh’s side. The majority (fans mainly) took Greg’s side and the rest thought they were both shit. Her supporters were virtually non-existent as far as I remember. She ended up deleting her Youtube channels and social media. The comments on her music videos were walls of criticism and hate for years after their break up. It really wasn’t until years later the internet softened up to her, mainly for two reasons. One: Greg continued to obsessively talk about her online for years (case in point: this video), while Shiloh publicly talked about him maybe a handful of times. When she appeared in a Q&A video with her friend she refused to say anything negative about him. It seemed like Shiloh moved on and matured while Greg continued to want to destroy her reputation and maintain some control over her. Two: Billie. The parallels between Billie’s relationship with Greg and Shiloh’s are undeniable. I noticed after his final break up with Billie, many people’s perception of Shiloh changed and the comments on videos about her and her music videos drastically changed. Like before, everyone either took her stories about Greg with a grain of salt or straight up ignored them because she was caught lying so much, but since Billie had a similar story about Greg demanding she shave her head as Shiloh, people started to think maybe she wasn’t lying about everything and maybe she wasn’t as crazy as Greg made her out to be after all.

Ok so the first part of the video he talks to a woman who claims she dated Shiloh while Shiloh was simultaneously with (on and off) Greg and Shiloh’s baby daddy. Supposedly Greg and this woman talked long ago, but Greg didn’t remember who she was. They got into contact again because he mass twitter followed all of his gmail contacts in January. I think it’s weird we’ve never heard about this woman before and Greg somehow managed to keep her a secret (before he “forgot” about her) for all these years since he’s usually quick to use information like this to make people look bad in videos. He’s mentioned countless times Shiloh cheated on him with her baby daddy, but would it have not been beneficial for him to mention she cheated on him with two people?

One of the first thing this woman tells Greg is Shiloh lied about her daughter’s death. It wasn’t a lie. There were a bunch of anti-os who hated Shiloh that continued to follow her and her life after Greg. Some befriended her baby daddy to get dirt on her and they confirmed the baby passed away.

When it comes to Shiloh, I don’t know why Greg (imo) wrecks his credibility by taking the word of random people from the internet as fact to use against her. This woman supposedly was cheated on by Shiloh, broke up with Shiloh because Shiloh got pregnant, stayed close enough to Shiloh months later that Shiloh told her about her daughter’s death, then somehow confirmed Shiloh lied about the death?? Ok look, first of all, how the fuck does someone get away with faking a baby’s death? It doesn’t make any sense. Shiloh has a family, the baby daddy has a family, don’t you think someone would realize the baby was still alive? Where is her daughter now if she lied? This wasn’t an internet hoax. It was real. I remember the the baby daddy announcing the death online. They weren’t together when it happened. He had no reason to lie for her.

Greg goes through some of the stuff we’ve all heard already. Claiming Shiloh threatened to kill herself and make it look like he did it, she told him she has a split personality, blah blah blah. “But you all said I’m lying” - he’s trying to make it seem like this random woman from the internet proved all of his stories about Shiloh true. These are all still unproven claims from Greg as far as I’m concerned, just as the stories Shiloh told about Greg are also unproven claims. That’s how it works. You don’t just get to tell a potentially reputation damaging story about someone with no proof and everyone just believes you because you keep mentioning how “honest” you are. Also, I don’t see how what this woman said proves any of those stories true. I guess to him he’s proving Shiloh was a liar? But we all already knew that.

He continues with DM’s from the woman. She says she found out she was being cheated on because of one of Greg’s videos.

He says everyone made blogs and memes about how evil he was because we all wanted to believe Shiloh. Again, this isn’t true. most antis took neither side and used their platforms to criticize Shiloh just as much as they criticized Greg. He says people wanted what Shiloh said to be true because he had opinions about people we liked and he’s not allowed to have opinions. Wow. I guess it wasn’t the uploading her mental breakdowns to Youtube, or the fact that he left his 5 year marriage to peruse a 17 year old, or that he creepily traveled to a state Shiloh just happened to be to have sex with her legally, or shitting on her for 8 years. Hm wow I guess it wasn’t his own actions that lead to people criticizing his role in the relationship. It was his gosh darn controversial opinions. Wow honesty is such a burden. Poor Greg.

He tells more stories we already know to prove being in a relationship with her was horrible. memory loss, seizures, fire department bringing her back home after she passed out on the sidewalk, calling the cops on her. “You internet folks conclude that she’s actually the rational sane one despite how obvious that is not the fact.” Lmao. Greg no one thinks Shiloh was rational or sane during your relationship. Even most of her die hard supporters admit she went crazy, they blame Greg for causing it.

“I don’t know how you could lie about a baby dying, but she did it apparently.”

He’s so desperate for shit to use against Shiloh he’s using shit from unconfirmed sources and hiding behind “apparently”. Like if he truly believed Shiloh lied about her daughter’s death, don’t you think he could get into contact with someone that could prove her daughter is still alive? That would make a heck of a video. Even if he’s too lazy to do that does he not think it’s weird Shiloh supposedly got away with convincing the internet her child was dead for 7 years?? He won’t look into it because he knows it might not be true and he knows if he repeats it a few times in a video his fans would believe him anyway.

The woman in the DM lists stealing as one of Shiloh’s toxic traits. Greg says he never saw Shiloh steal anything and he would have mentioned it to us. I feel like I should point of a majority of his fan base mix up Shiloh and Skye. he accused Skye of stealing his belongings and his money through alimony, but you’ll see a lot of bananas who bash Shiloh say she stole from Greg.

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