#again even though this isn’t an ask that’s where the plot goes so!! | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

daemour · 8 months ago

Text

Pairing: roommate! San x f! yn

Word Count: 10,664

Warnings: cursing, alcohol consumption, smut warnings under cut

Genre: Angst, fluff, smut, f2l au, college au, M for mature audiences

Summary: As the resident fuckboy San's best friend, you're legally obligated to be his hype man. It's only fitting as you're one of the few who can resist his boyish charms. But when he's set his sights on someone you cannot stand, perhaps you need to dig a bit deeper into your feelings after all.

Smut Warnings: masturbation (f), voyeurism, sexual fantasies, oral (f), missionary, protected sex, very slight breast play, overstimulation, cowgirl, some cumplay, dirty dirty talk, fingering, slight body worship ig?, praise, I literally have no idea I wrote it at a time when I should've been in bed so lmk if I missed anything

this is for the jackson wang party fic collab finished with @mingsolo (hella good) @flurrys-creativity (Pygalgia, Effervescent, and Abience) and @sanjoongie (trouble) <3 I still have one more to go but we'll ignore that LMAOOOOO I added too much plot :') flurry was a dear and helped me sort out my thoughts and I managed to write 8k of it in one day lol.

hope u all enjoy and sorry I'm a professional yapper there's no shutting me up

“Going out again?” you ask your best friend and flatmate, San, as he walks past where you’re seated at the kitchen counter, suffering through your essays.

“Yep,” San answers easily, popping the ‘p’ and leaning over to take a peek at your laptop screen. “You misspelt ‘dextrorotatory’, you wrote it as ‘dexrotatory’.”

As your eyes find the typo, you groan and plant your head on the table. “I give up,” you declare dramatically, “I’ll drop out and become a taxi driver.”

San laughs. “First of all, you can’t drive that well. Second of all, you’d make more money as a stripper.” He dodges your smack with ease. “Third, you’re smart and you’ll ace these like always. You’re just a little mentally constipated. Why don’t you join me tonight?”

You think about it for a minute. While you probably do need a break from staring at your laptop, you know how wild the parties San goes to can get from personal experience. And you don’t think it’s a good idea when it's the end of your semester and the final year of your master's program. You just can’t afford to do that. “I’ll pass this time,” you sigh. “Maybe after exam season.”

San hums. “All right. Make sure to take a break, though,” he reminds you, dropping a quick kiss on the top of your head. “See you later.”

He soon disappears out of the door and you turn your focus away from your best friend to your homework. You feel bad for whoever his new conquest will be at the party.

In your opinion, it’s best to keep San at arm’s length when it comes to a romantic relationship. Not that you like him, but you also don’t want to be another notch on his bedpost, and you most certainly do not want to ruin your eight-year-long friendship. It’s not hard to see that San isn’t interested in a long relationship, not right now at least.

You honestly find it amusing that so many girls and guys still throw themselves at him and then get upset when he doesn’t give them a second glance after the initial night. His reputation precedes him, especially in your small town, and yet there will always be a line out the door for him. You don’t even know how he knows so many people.

With a sigh, you clear out your thoughts and refocus on your organic chemistry work. You’re lucky your job offered to pay for your master's classes, but the workload is killing you inside. You’re incredibly happy you’re almost done, and with newfound motivation, you hunker down and start writing out your notes again.

It’s almost two in the morning when you finally yawn and start putting your books away, and it’s almost three when you hear the front door open and the sound of San stumbling into the shoe rack as he always does. “You’re home already, Sanah?”

“YN!” San stumbles his way into the bathroom where you’re combing your hair, wrapping his arms around you and tucking his flushed face into your neck. “You’re still up?”

You laugh, tapping him on the head with your brush. “Yes, but I’m about to go to bed. And you should too, you know.”

San groans, his hold on your waist tightening and his words slurring together. “I don’t wanna,” he whines, “the bed's too cold.”

You sigh fondly. This happens almost every time he drinks, and usually, that’s why he doesn’t drink too much when he’s by himself. He gets too cuddly with people and you’re usually the one to keep him from bedding everyone he sees. You suppose he somehow didn’t end up with anyone in bed and he’s disappointed now. “Do you think you’ll ever ask to sleep with me nicely, or will you just settle for wrestle-cuddling me into my own bed?” you ask, rolling your eyes as San does not answer, just pulling you towards your room. “There’s my answer.”

You’re too used to his drunk antics and just let him move you around. It’s comforting in a way, that he’s comfortable enough around you to do this with you, and it makes your heart warm whenever he throws his arm around you and presses his face in your neck.

You’d never admit it, but it’s nights like this when you sleep the best. With his warm breath tickling your neck, you let your body relax and your eyes flutter shut.

“God, I’ve got a raging headache,” San groans when he sees you enter the kitchen with a mess of bed hair. “I went so crazy with the soju last night, I think I’m going to die.”

You laugh, reaching for the pot to make some oatmeal for him. “Don’t be so dramatic. Why did you even drink so much anyway? No bitches?”

San snorts but immediately whines from the sharp pain that probably shot through his skull. “You’re so mean to me! No, I got no bitches, but that was from my own choice anyway. I don’t want to fuck around anymore.”

Both your eyebrows raise into your hairline. “No? What changed things, hm? Finally decided your one true love is Byeol?” As if on cue, your shared cat meows and curls around your ankles, and you bend down to scratch behind her ears.

“Never had to decide that, we all know she’s the real number one in my life. No, I think I’m interested in someone.” You stop your petting of Byeol, who meows in protest and runs off to pout somewhere. “Come on, don’t act like you just saw a ghost.”

“Who?” is the only question that comes out of your mouth. Of course, San has had a crush before, but he’s never stopped screwing around unless he was actively dating that person. He’s a fuckboy, but he’s not a piece of shit at least. This is new.

“Lee Yeseul. I met her yesterday at the party, and she’s so sweet. She was so out of place at the party, and not in a mean way. She just…has such an aura around her.” San’s voice is soft even just talking about her and you get the feeling he’s being serious. “We’re meeting up for coffee today.”

“That’s…amazing, Sanah. I really hope it goes well for you,” you smile at him, pushing a bowl of oatmeal over to him. “Don’t forget to let me make a speech at your wedding.”

San chuckles, rolling his eyes at your jokes. “Yeah, yeah. Don’t you have study group today? Go there and stop bothering me.”

You ruffle his messy hair before planting a kiss on it and pinching his cheek. He blindly reaches around to smack at you but you dodge him easily, laughing as you head out to grab your keys. “See you later, Sanah. Have a good da-ate.”

San grumbles at you but ultimately returns to his food. You think you can hear him muttering about you being a pain in the ass and you smile to yourself. You don’t have the heart to tell him you know Lee Yeseul…and she’s a major bitch. You sincerely hope she’s sweet to San at least—he deserves the best. But you find her absolutely draining, especially with how often she talks about herself and doesn’t pay attention to anyone else ever. If she cries in your class one more time you think you might smack her yourself.

You still remember the time you had gotten a call that your grandfather had died, and after overhearing your conversation, instead of comforting you, she started talking about how “so many of my family members died in the past ten years.” Sure, maybe she was trying, but you’ve known about her antics enough that it was clear she just wanted to make it about her.

But if San likes her, who are you to interfere? He has a pretty good eye for who has a good personality so maybe Yeseul has changed. You’re not one to stop him. Not that you ever could. When he first started going out to party, you would tag along to make sure he wouldn’t make any bad decisions, but your efforts seldom paid off. You’re pretty sure he must be blessed since he somehow hadn’t pissed off anyone majorly enough to have them call a hit on him.

Shaking your head, you rid yourself of these thoughts and go to the library. There’s no use dwelling on it, the more you think about it, the worse your feeling about his crush on Yeseul gets. He’s a grown man, he doesn’t need you to parent him.

“Woah, who pissed in your cereal?” You should’ve known you wouldn’t be able to hide your bad mood from your study buddy, Hongjoong. Although you only see him for studying, you’re confident enough to call him your closest friend other than San. “Are you okay?”

You sigh, dropping your books on the table. It earns you a harsh ‘shh’ from the librarian which you apologise half-heartedly for. “Do you remember Yeseul? Lee Yeseul?”

Hongjoong’s brows raise high into his hairline. “The professional bitcher? What did she do now?”

“San’s into her, and with her personality, she’s probably loving the attention from the professional heartbreaker.” You groan, glaring at the cover of your organic chemistry textbook. “It’s none of my business if he cares for her, but damn, I wish he could’ve picked anyone else.”

Hongjoong hums, leaning forward and poking at the top of your head. “Look, you’ve been his friend for years. I think you have a bit more of a reason to poke your nose into his business than most. Give it a few weeks, and if it truly bothers you, then you can bring it up to San.”

You sigh. “Maybe.” You say nothing else on the topic and Hongjoong knows not to broach it anymore. Sometimes you wish he wasn’t so smart.

“YN, I didn’t know you knew Yeseul!” is the first thing San says to you one week after he returns from one of his many dates with her. “When I mentioned you being my roommate she told me you were in the same class as her.”

You wince to yourself as you take a long swig of your coffee. “Mmh, I didn’t think it was that relevant,” you say. You can practically hear Hongjoong rolling his eyes at your excuse. You know you should tell him your qualms about Yeseul, especially since the gross feeling in your gut has only gotten stronger. But you’re not sure you want to tread those waters. San’s sweet, but he’s loyal to a fault and probably wouldn’t like you talking badly about Yeseul.

San narrows his eyes, clearly suspicious but not willing to pry. “Well, maybe if we ever find you a date, we can go on a double date.” He moves on pretty quickly, though, walking over to lean over your shoulder and look at your laptop. “Still going on that paper?”

You hum, cracking your knuckles. “Yeah, it’s due tomorrow so I need to pump it out today and then get Hongjoong to look it over.” You lean back, letting your head rest on San’s torso as you yawn. “I can’t wait for this to be over so that I can graduate already.”

San laughs, leaning down to rest his chin on your head. “You’re smart. You can do this. And when you’re done, I’ll take you to a party and we can celebrate.”

You groan, shifting forward and putting your hands back on the keyboard. “Well, in that case, I should get back to writing this.” As you start typing again, you hear the buzzer ring and the warmth of San’s body leaves you as he goes to check who it is.

“Oh, hey, Yeseul! Come on up!” Your eyebrows raise into your hairline and your head snaps up. Why would Yeseul go to all this trouble of coming here? Didn’t they just see each other?

You close your eyes and take a couple of deep breaths before facing the dragon herself. You can hear the tell-tale sound of her voice pitched up to sound more sweet, although it’s grown to be grating on your ears. “Hi, Sannie,” she purrs and you have to refrain from retching. “I was on my way home but I realised it went right by your apartment so I figured I could come say hi. It doesn’t look like you’re too busy, right?”

“No, not at all,” San replies, and you hate how sweetly he talks to her. “YN is in too, she’s writing her final paper. Wanna say hi? She could probably use the distraction.”

No, I don’t need the distraction, is what you want to scream out, but your mother did not raise you like that although you wish she did. Instead, you just smile politely at the girl entering your kitchen. “Hello, Yeseul. Good to see you again.”

“Hey, YNie!” Her cheery nickname for you has your eye twitching. “How’s the paper going? I finished mine a few weeks ago so I’m home free. Just need to submit it.”

“That’s great, Yeseul,” you say, tone slightly more monotonous than you wanted it to be and San shoots you a look. “Hopefully you get a good grade on it.”

“Hey, would you want to join us for dinner?” San cuts in and you can already feel a headache starting to pulse behind your eyes. “I was going to order pizza since it’s my turn today and I’m not nearly as good of a cook as YN.”

“Oh, that would be lovely! I don’t mind whatever toppings,” Yeseul claps happily. The urge to punch her in the face increases bit by bit for you. San nods happily, stepping out into the living room to place the call. After a moment, Yeseul turns to you with puppy eyes and you brace yourself for whatever she has up her sleeve. “Could I trouble you for a glass of water, YNie?”

You try your best to keep your composure as you get up to fetch her a glass of water. She takes it without even a thank you and you decide you’d much rather die than deal with her any longer so you close your laptop with a sigh. “I’m actually meeting with a friend for dinner, but you definitely should stay and have fun,” you say, smiling as plausibly as you can. You do not have dinner plans but you’re sure you can figure it out.

When you go into your room, you’re drawing blanks. You’re still going out, but you’ll probably just end up calling a friend to complain. As you leave the room and grab your keys, San meets eyes with you and frowns. “Where are you going?”

“Ah, I promised to have dinner with a friend so I’m heading out. Enjoy your time with Yeseul, though.”

The furrow between San’s brows deepens. “But I already ordered the pizza.”

You laugh, shaking your head. “I can bring the leftovers tomorrow for lunch. Sorry, I just forgot to tell you, but I really have to go now. Bye!” Before he can say goodbye as well, you slip out the door. The suffocating feeling that is encompassing you lifts and you sigh in relief, but then you somehow feel worse at the idea of San and Yeseul having fun and giggling and cuddling.

You shake your head again, trying to clear your muddled thoughts before setting down to go find your dinner. Fast food was the easiest option, and you figured you could at least sit in your car and wallow in self-pity.

After you receive your order you park and pull out your phone, scrolling through your contacts. You don’t want to call your family because as much as you love them, they can be a bit over-protective and probably will offer to help you find a different apartment and that would be a bit dramatic. In the end, Hongjoong is probably the next best option.

He doesn't pick up immediately, and you’re just about to hang up when the phone crackles and Hongjoong’s voice comes through. “Why are you calling me?”

You can’t help but bark out a laugh at his disgruntled tone. “Hongjoong, it’s a perfectly reasonable hour to call, don’t blame me for your shit sleeping schedule. Are you actually free though?”

Hongjoong sighs and if you focus you can hear the sound of him rolling over in bed. “What’s up?”

“It’s about Yeseul again. She came around today, and it was just…so suffocating. Like, why did San have to pick her? There’s so many girls, and out of them all he picks her? The most bitchy one I know?”

Hongjoong hums. “Why does it annoy you so much?”

You groan, leaning your head back and taking a long sip of your drink. “She’s self-centred, bitchy, and she’s just so fake. I don’t think this relationship will end well, Joong. Clearly he’s just blinded and she’s so manipulative.”

“But why are you so bothered by this specifically? I mean, sure we’ve had bad interactions with Yeseul, but you’re pretty nonchalant about the shit San gets up to and you like to let him deal with the consequences himself.”

You frown glaring at the phone although you know he can’t see it and you pop a fry into your mouth. “I don’t know. It just feels different. I feel like I should interfere this time. I mean, he’s a lot more serious this go around.”

Hongjoong hums, rolling once again as he yawns. “YN, be totally honest with me. This is a shot in the dark, but I think this is pretty important.” You hold your breath in anticipation. “Do you like San?”

“Oh sure, he’s a good friend–”

“You and I both know that’s not what I meant.” You bite your lip, stiffening in your chair. “YN, you need to be honest with yourself. The way you talk about San, you interact with him, it’s not how just roommates, just friends interact. You kiss each other's heads, YN. And it can be platonic, but I’ve rarely seen San do that to his female friends, and I’ve never seen you do that, period. You don’t even kiss me.” His voice turns teasing on the last bit but you’re too shocked to register.

Do you like San? You love him like a friend, of course. But when you think about him being with anyone else, even if it wasn’t Yeseul, something in you aches. When you think about San’s smile being directed to anyone else, you can feel a burning in your gut. The answer is clear, whether you like it or not.

“I…yes. I do.” The confession comes out quietly. “But I don’t want to do anything about it. Like you said, it’s up to San whether he likes Yeseul enough. I can’t interfere.”

You can practically hear the look Hongjoong would be levelling at you. “Why not?”

You shrug. “When San likes someone, nothing can stop him from liking someone unless he wants to. I’ll just let it run its course and hopefully my own feelings will vanish in the process.”

“That doesn’t sound very healthy, YN.”

You let out a despondent laugh. “Sure, probably not. But who knows? Maybe I can find someone else in the process.” You let out a sigh before glancing at your now-cold sandwich. “I gotta head out, but thanks for talking, Joong. I’ll see you in class.”

Hongjoong can barely say goodbye before you hang up the phone and lean back. This is going to be difficult. The more you see Yeseul, the more you know you’ll accidentally slip up and something will tip her and San off. Your headache is pulsing behind your eyes and you take a small bite of your sandwich, your appetite diminishing. You miss being a child and your biggest worry is that San sneezed on your lollipop.

With another groan, you wrap up the sandwich and just go for a late-night drive instead to clear your head. It’s something that has never failed to calm you down and keep your mind level. San always berates you for driving alone at night, but you’d like to say you’re pretty safe. Plus, even he has agreed that it’s pretty calming when—you frown, forcing thoughts of San to leave your brain.

You don’t really know how long you’ve been out, but it’s surely long enough that Yeseul has left. As you carefully open the door, there’s a long silence, and you sigh, happy you made it home free. But as you’re about to call out for San, you hear a high-pitched moan come from his bedroom. And it certainly is not San.

You almost turn tail and head right back out of the apartment when you hear San’s reverberating moans fill the house. Against your better judgment, you take off your shoes and step closer towards his bedroom. His bedroom door is cracked open and curse him for putting his mirror right in view where you can see him leaning back on his bed, his lower half hidden off the edge of it and you can only see Yeseul’s knees.

And in your head, you know it’s wrong. But your heart is beating out of your chest and you can feel heat building in your core. And, well, you’ve always worn your heart on your sleeve. You keep yourself pressed against the wall, staring at the way the muscles in San’s neck strain and the way he moans with every snap of his hips. You’re sure your panties are soaked through by now, and your teeth sink into your lower lip to keep yourself quiet. The taste of copper enters your mouth but you couldn’t care less.

It’s only when San sits up, probably to fuck into Yeseul better and he disappears from the mirror that you rip yourself away and escape into your own room. Not another thought enters your brain as you strip your leggings and underwear off, flopping on your bed and closing your eyes as you let your hand trail down to press against your slick pussy. It doesn’t take long for you to sink your fingers into your sopping cunt, turning your head to bury your face into your pillow.

The guilt in the back of your mind is quickly sent away as you imagine San’s hands fucking you instead. He’s always had well-worn hands, and your brain fogs up as you imagine him leaning forward to mouth at your neck as he fucks you.

Your brain flips back and forth between the idea of him eating you out so well and fucking so many loads into you with his thick cock that your stomach swells and you whimper into your pillow as your core tightens and you come onto your fingers. You feel tears prick your eyes as you get up to wipe your hands of the cream coating your fingers and toss the tissue in the trash. You’re not sure how you’ll be able to face San or Yeseul again after that.

You can feel the shame burning inside of you and you close your eyes and cry yourself to sleep silently.

Waking up is disorienting, your eyes red-rimmed and your bottom lip raw and blood dried on it. You feel like death and you’re pretty sure you can’t attend class like this. You lean over and grab your phone, yawning as you send your professor a text with a weak excuse. You don’t really care how plausible it is, Professor Jeong usually is quite understanding so you don’t worry about that for too long. San had texted you an hour ago, asking if you had come home, and you choose not to answer it.

You can hear mumbling in the other room, probably Yeseul and San sharing goodbyes, when you hear the door shut behind her. Unlike you, she’s probably happy to go to class and tell all her friends about her night with the campus fuckboy.

It takes another thirty minutes for you to finally roll out of bed and put some lotion on your face, hoping for the traces of the questionable night you had to erase from your face. Once you’re satisfied with your appearance, you venture out into your living room where San is standing by the door. “When did you get back?” he asks without even turning around. “I texted you like, an hour ago.”

You shrug, avoiding his eyes as you move into the kitchen to find breakfast. “I only just woke up, San.”

Your roommate gives a short huff, following close behind you. “Don’t you have class? Yeseul just left so you could walk with her.”

You try not to roll your eyes at the idea of that. “I’m not feeling well so I don’t think I’ll go.” “You’re not feeling well?” San’s voice deepens in concern and as you grab a yoghurt, he places his hand atop your forehead. “You are feeling pretty warm.”

At his touch, too many memories of last night flood through your brain and you shake away his hand. “Yeah. I’ll just go lie down for a little. Have a good day.”

Before he can say anything else, or realise your suspicious behaviour, you dodge past him and head off back into your room to hide. “I left your pizza in the fridge,” he calls after you and you just grunt in thanks before barricading yourself in your room.

You lean against the door for a minute before you realise you didn’t even grab a spoon. Unwilling to go back out there, you’ve resigned yourself to licking it out of the container like a cat when you hear a gentle knock at the door.

“I got you a spoon,” San’s unsure voice filters through the wooden door, and you squeeze your eyes shut.

“Thanks, San,” you murmur, turning to open the door a crack and take the proffered utensil. “Sorry for being short with you.”

His lips quirk into a half-smile, a silent acceptance of your apology. “I get it. Just get some rest, YN.”

You close the door again, this time a warm heart in your chest mixing with the guilt you still feel in your gut. You’re not sure how on earth you’re going to get over your feelings for San.

Avoiding San goes well for the most part. You are in your finals week anyway, and you’re spending most of your time at the library or in class. Your college’s library stays open for 24 hours during the last week of school anyways so some nights you’ve just been staying there until morning. Hongjoong disapproves heavily but doesn’t say much about it and you appreciate his support either way.

Avoiding Yeseul proves much harder. She seems to always find her way to wherever you happen to be, interrupting you and Hongjoong’s study sessions with a perfect smile and narrowed eyes. You don’t know what she wants from you, and you aren’t pleased with her presence.

But one evening, you’re about to leave the library to have some dinner when she corners you. “YN, let’s talk,” she says in that sickeningly saccharine voice of hers, looping her arm into yours and pulling you down the street. “I have some things to ask you.”

Unwilling, you try to tug your arm out of her grasp, but the girl is stronger than you expected. She pulls you all the way to her dorm on campus, sitting you down on her leather couch. “What is your relationship with Choi San?”

Her question comes so suddenly you need a minute to register. To her credit, Yeseul waits patiently for you to gather your thoughts. “He’s my friend and roommate?” you say as truthfully as you can muster, although you know it’s an absolute lie, and judging from her expression, Yeseul doesn’t believe you either.

“Don’t take me as a fool, YN. The way he talks about you is undeniable.”

“That seems like something you should be talking to him about,” you say, attempting to get up from the couch but Yeseul just pushes you back down.

“I’ve tried. He just tells me there’s nothing to worry about and I don’t believe that,” Yeseul grits through her teeth.

And you have to give it to her. She did try to come to San about her worries. But the way she refuses to trust him grates on your nerves. He stopped his fuckboy activities to be with her, and yet she’s worried about you, one of the few girls who isn’t all over him at any moment. You arch a brow. “Do you not trust him?”

Yseul scoffs. “Of course not. He’s a fuckboy. But I like the status I get with him. I just don’t want to end up embarrassed.”

Well, that will be inevitable, you can’t help but think to yourself. No matter how much your relationship with San is strained, you’re not about to let Yeseul talk shit about him like he isn’t genuinely trying for her.

“That’s where you come into play,” Yeseul’s smirk turns sharp. “I’m going to call San. Ask him to choose between us. If he chooses you, then I want you to stay far, far away from him.”

You shrug. No matter the outcome, it’s not like you’re not already keeping your distance from San. In the end, you’ll just tell him to break up with her and let him deal with the chaos himself. “Go ahead,” bitch.

San picks up on the first ring. “Yeseul?” He’s cheery and your heart aches at the thought of Yeseul breaking his so easily. “What’s the occasion?”

“Hey, babe, I just have a quick question, and I need you to answer truthfully for me, okay?” At his pause, she takes that as a go-ahead. “Who would you pick? Me or YN.”

There’s a long silence on the phone. “Yeseul, we need to break up.”

Only one thing unites you and Yeseul in this moment, and it’s your shared confusion for San’s reaction. “What do you mean?” her voice turns panicked. “Isn’t that a little far?”

“You’ve been stuck on this, and I don’t know how much I have to reassure you, Yeseul. I haven’t even seen YN for the past two weeks. And she’s my closest friend. I’m not dropping her for a two-week relationship. I hope you have a good time, Yeseul.”

Before you can react at all, Yeseul screeches and points an accusing finger at you. “This is all your fault, YN!”

Your jaw drops at her absolute audacity. “My fault? What are you on? I was just trying to live peacefully when you dragged me into this plot ignoring my advice. I told you to talk to him, to just fucking trust him. God, you’re an idiot. And I’m going home.”

Without another word, you leave, still fuming over that interaction. Couldn’t she just have made the call without you? You’re happy you don’t have to do all the convincing for San to leave her, but that just complicates things for you. Would he really so easily drop Yeseul just for you? From what you’ve heard, he was practically head over heels for her.

With another sigh, you head back to the library. You need to finish that exam.

“Pens down, and turn in your exams,” you hear the professor call, and you don’t think you’ve ever gotten up so fast. You’re so, so fucking happy that you’ve finished your last year and now you’re free.

As soon as your professor accepts your paper you race out of the lecture hall, only stopped by the cafeteria when you hear someone call your name. Lee Juyeon, someone you’ve started growing closer to, waves you down. “Hey, YN, congrats on finishing!” he smiles at you and you can’t help but smile back, the giddiness contagious.

“Thanks! You too,” you say, pulling him into a hug. “It’s so nice to be done.” Practically nothing could dampen your mood, especially seeing Juyeon. He’s sweet, and you have an inkling he likes you. And you’re not opposed to it.

“It really is,” Juyeon agreed cheerfully. “Look, I have to go celebrate with my family, I just wanted to say hi. But hey…there’s this end of the year party on Saturday, and I was wondering if you wanted to go with me.”

And your suspicions were right. You think about it for a moment. You’re not the biggest party person, anyone knows that, but Juyeon is sweet and just what you need, so you accept eagerly. It doesn’t take long for the two of you to exchange numbers and for him to promise to send you more details before he runs off. And through your excitement, you know you still have to go meet with San who’s probably waiting for you just outside. He wanted to see you as soon as you finish your exams, and you didn’t have the heart to decline.

“Congratulations on finishing your last exam, YN!” San cheers as soon as you exit the college building. “I’m so proud of you!”

You’re too tired to complain when San sweeps you up into a hug, just letting yourself relax in his firm arms. After all this work, you think you’ll let yourself indulge in his affection. “Thanks, Sanah. I appreciate it.” You let your chin rest on his broad shoulder, closing your eyes and letting the exhaustion take over you. “Can I go to bed now?”

You hear him chuckle, the vibrations from his chest comforting you. “Yeah, yeah. We can celebrate later. Come on.”

He tugs you all the way to your apartment, dropping you on the couch and quickly curling right up next to you. You can’t bring yourself to care. “I’m proud of you,” he repeats into your hair as he tucks your head into his neck. Your eyes flutter shut.

When you reopen them, it’s bordering on evening. San is no longer wrapped around you, and you can hear him moving about in the kitchen. “San,” you call out, voice raspy from having just woken up. “What are you doing?”

“Ah, I’m making dinner,” he responds, his voice too warm for your liking, your heart beating just a little faster. “Come and eat.”

With a bit of difficulty, you rise from the couch and move to the kitchen, taking a seat at the counter. “Japchae? When did you learn how to cook this?”

San chuckles. “Wooyoung taught me the other day because he was bored. I figured it’d be a nice surprise for you after all your hard work.”

Your lips twitch, unsure if you should smile or pout. “That’s sweet. Thank you again, San.”

As you start eating the noodles (there’s a little too much sesame but you don’t have the heart to tell San that), San clears his throat. “So…I promised to take you to a party.”

You vaguely remember this conversation. “Ah, yeah. What did you have in mind?”

“There’s this end of the year party, it’s supposed to be the biggest one, hosted by Jackson Wang.”

“Ah–” you shake your head, eyes apologetic. “I promised someone else I’d go with them. I didn’t know that was the party you wanted to take me to. Maybe we can do something else on a different day?”

San’s lips turn downward the slightest bit. “That’s okay. There are other parties. Who invited you, by the way?” His tone is casual, and yet you still feel like you’re walking into the lion’s den.

“Ah, Lee Juyeon from college. I think he’s in Hongjoong’s philosophy department, but he’s a year behind. He’s cute so I figured I’d give it a try.”

“It’s a date?” Your brows furrow at the heaviness in San’s voice but you pay it no mind and nod. “I see. Well, have fun.”

The rest of the dinner is filled with silence, San picking at his food and you in no mood to try and dissect his mood. He takes your empty bowl and starts doing the dishes, and you mumble out a thank you before running back to your room. He’s clearly not willing to talk more and it’s best to give him space.

As you lay in bed, you can’t help but worry about what is so grating on his mind after you mentioned your date. You can’t think of anything that would cause him to be angry—as far as you’re aware he has no grudges against Lee Juyeon, much less met him. Shaking your head, you try and fall asleep. It’s best not to dwell on it, you can just ask him tomorrow.

It’s Saturday, and you’re in a foul mood. San hasn’t spoken to you in the four days leading up to the party, avoiding you like there’s no tomorrow. The only saving grace comes in the form of Juyeon’s excited texts, telling you all about his outfit for the party, and you respond with matching enthusiasm. When you meet with Juyeon in front of the large house where the party is held, the thought of San isn’t even on your mind. Instead, you just take Juyeon’s offered hand and follow him into the party.

You weave through the bodies, reaching the counter where shots are being passed around. “Want vodka or tequila?” Juyeon asks, his voice pitching higher to be heard over the bass. Without answering him, you just reach for the bottle of tequila, pouring the two of you shots. “Good choice,” Juyeon laughs, throwing his head back as he downs the alcohol, you following suit shortly.

“You know, I never pegged you for a college party fan,” you lean in, laughing. “Maybe I should hang out with you more.”

Juyeon chuckles, wrapping an arm around your waist. “Maybe you should. I know great party-throwers. Although I’ve heard you’ve been to your fair share, what being San’s friend and all.”

You shake your head, a smile on your face. “Maybe at first, but you know, organic chemistry isn’t an easy major to balance with a party life.”

Juyeon laughs loudly, bumping you with his hip. “I understand the pain. Philosophy falls into that category of majors too. Another shot?”

You take the second shot happily, letting the alcohol burn through your veins as you stumble alongside Juyeon’s wandering through the crowd. Whatever you’re doing is a blur, all you can focus on is Juyeon’s smile and his warm hand holding yours.

It feels like barely a moment has passed when Juyeon pulls you into a nearly empty room of couches, only a few other couples lingering in the corners. “I hope you’ve been enjoying yourself,” Juyeon starts, his eyes sparkling as he takes in your appearance. “It’s been fun hanging out.”

“I did too,” you agree with a small smile, looking up at him through your lashes.

He leans in, and you lean in, and your lips brush. It’s a sweet kiss, one that you lean into as Juyeon wraps his arms around your waist. It’s warm and you smile into it. And then a familiar face pops into your head. You wonder to yourself how San would kiss you, if he would do it as sweetly as Juyeon or if he would devour your lips like it was his last meal.

When Juyeon pulls away for air, you feel guilt burning in your stomach again. Why would you think of other men when Juyeon’s right here in front of you? As Juyeon leans in to kiss you again, you almost move back before a hand grips your shoulder and pulls you into a broad chest.

“Hey, man, I’m going to have to talk to YN if you don’t mind.” You’d recognise your best friend’s voice anywhere, and it only serves to fill you with annoyance. Sure, you weren’t as into Juyeon’s kisses as you expected, but it doesn’t mean you’re thrilled to be interrupted by the man who’s been ignoring you.

Juyeon takes one look at San, and something changes in his eyes. A mix of reluctance and acceptance, and with a short nod and smile towards you, he slips away from you. You turn to San, frowning at the sharpness in his narrowed eyes, not one you’re used to seeing or enjoy seeing. “Why would you kiss him?” he spits, and your annoyance grows with confusion being added to the mix.

“What do you mean, ‘why kiss him’? I told you, San, I was on a date. Why the fuck did you interrupt us?”

“I like you.” Those three words would be a dream for you to hear from his mouth…if you weren’t so pissed.

“No, fuck that. I do not need to hear that from you right now. Not when I was enjoying my night with Juyeon. What was confessing supposed to do for you, San? It’s too late now. I wanted to enjoy this party, and now I have to go apologise to Juyeon for you.” San opens his mouth to speak, but you shake your head, pushing him away from you.

You leave San standing by himself as you search for Juyeon, your mood immediately souring. Why would he fucking do this to you? You can feel tears burning your eyelids and you abandon your search for Juyeon, searching instead for some liquor to take away your embarrassment.

As you pour yourself another shot of tequila, you notice a familiar face, Hongjoong talking to a girl you recognise as someone he hangs out with sometimes. They look like they’re getting it on and you feel a little bad, but you need his advice. “Hey, Kim Hongjoong!” you call out to him, waving him over. Hongjoong’s eyes brighten and he makes his way over, leaving the girl staring after him longingly, but her attention is soon taken away by two other guys. You recognise one of them from the cafeteria but you don’t remember his name.

“Hey, YN, what’s up? I didn’t expect to see you here, did San take you?” Your face falls and Hongjoong realises he stepped into dangerous territory. “Okay, what happened?”

“I can’t believe San is mad at me for kissing someone at the party,” you groan after explaining to Hongjoong the events leading up to now. “Sure, maybe it wasn’t the best move on my part but he’s had like, twenty million one-night stands, and yet I can’t kiss someone else? He hasn’t even talked to me after I mentioned going on a date. And yet he looked positively murderous after he saw me kissing that other guy.”

Hongjoong tilts his head, confused. “Isn’t that what you wanted, though? You like him.”

“I did! I do! But I’m so sick of waiting around for him, and I could’ve had a chance at liking someone else. He’s all over the place, and I don’t know if that’s what I want in a man.” You’re lying to both Hongjoong and yourself, and Hongjoong knows it, raising an eyebrow.

“Honestly, YN, it just sounds like you need to talk to him.” Hongjoong crosses his arms, tapping his foot and eager to back to the girl was with, but also not wanting to ditch you in your time of need. You feel a little bad for pulling him away, but your mind is swirling with so many thoughts, you don’t know if you can sort them out by yourself and drinking to erase those thoughts is not something you like to do. You’re not San.

And speak of the devil, you smell his familiar cologne before his hand lands on your shoulder and pulls you into his chest. You whirl around out of his grip and glare at him. “Get off me,” you snap. “I’m in the middle of a conversation right now, Choi San.”

With one glance at Hongjoong, he raises his hands and winks at you. “Have that talk, YN. It’ll do you more good than harm.”

Oh, you’re going to kill that traitor after the party. You turn your attention back to San, your mouth twisted into a frown. “You make this quick or else.”

San has the decency to look a little ashamed as his eyes shake. “Can we talk on the patio? It’s too loud in here.”

With a dramatic sigh, you grab his wrist and pull him through the crowd to the back door, practically slamming it behind you. You can see the eyes of people interested in the drama through the windows but you pay it no mind. “Speak. You get five minutes before I go back in and you don’t talk to me again for the rest of the night.”

San’s face falls and his lips pull into a pout. But no matter how subconsciously adorable he is, you refuse to fall for his charms this time. The heat of anger is still curling in your gut when you think about the argument from earlier. “YN, come on, I had a good reason.”

You shake your head, ignoring the strands of hair that fall into your eyes. “No, San. Confessing to me is not a good reason to fuck up my night. You didn’t even apologise. You’ve been ignoring me for days after I mentioned my date, and the moment I kiss Juyeon you get all angry and jealous? Be for real.” You pause for breath, glaring daggers into his eyes. “You are not owed my time, especially after that shit you pulled. Yeseul’s jealousy is why you broke up with her, so why are you like this to me?”

San’s gaze intensifies and you can see him actively trying to reign in his temper. Although he does his best to remain calm, if tempers are rising, he can be intense. “YN, what was I supposed to do? Watch you go out with him? Watch you slip from my fingers just like that?”

“Yes!” you all but scream at him. “If I could sit by and let Yeseul take each little bit of your heart, you could’ve done the same! I was going to be happy, San! I wouldn’t have to sit behind and watch you from the sidelines with my heart slowly cracking. But I don’t get that same courtesy.”

You step forward, poking his chest with a finger as you let loose your storm of thoughts. In your anger, you don’t even notice San’s arm moving until it wraps around your waist and pulls you into him. The action shocks you enough that you stop mid-sentence, your finger still pressing into San’s flesh. “You love me?” San leans in, his nose brushing against yours.

You can feel heat flare up in your face as you stare wide-eyed at him. It takes you a moment to register your compromising position and you stumble back, pushing at his chest. “Don’t do that,” you hiss, turning your eyes away. “I don’t like you, San. Not anymore.”

“You’re lying.” San’s voice is firm. “Look at me in the eyes and tell me you don’t like me anymore.”

You don’t know where you got it from. You’ve never been good at lying, not to San. Maybe it was the alcohol burning through your system, mixing with the shame and anger you feel. But this time, you stare him directly in the eye and say the four words that might’ve been the biggest lie in your life. “I don’t like you.” San’s brows furrow and he shakes his head.

“No–”

“Yes, San. You cannot just waltz around and expect me to keep the patience I had for you. I’m sick of being pulled around like a puppet. Maybe at first you didn’t know. But refusing to give me space when I asked for it?” You shake your head, glancing back at the party. “I’m going back in. We can talk about the apartment lease later.”

Without glancing back, you re-enter the house. And maybe it hurts a little that he doesn’t go after you, but at this point, you’re too numb and all you want to do is go home and cry. But home is not an option, not when it would probably be the first place he would look for you. Fighting back the tears threatening to fall from your eyes, you slide into your car, staring blankly at the wheel for a long moment until you feel composed and sober enough to drive.

And drive you certainly do. You’re not quite sure where you’re going, and you’re plenty aware that this is a bad idea, but you just let yourself go around and calm yourself down first. The crisp breeze paired with the warm spring air does wonders to clear your head and paired with the late times, there are not too many cars out. It’s peaceful.

You’re not too sure how long you were out, but it’s long enough for the blurry memory of the argument to clear and you groan, pulling over to park by the side of the road and let your head hit the steering wheel. You went too far. San had always been the more emotional of you two, always wearing his heart on his sleeve. He must’ve had a hard time with Yeseul, and although it doesn’t excuse him, you never gave him a chance to properly apologise.

With a sigh, you check your phone to see five missed calls and twenty texts from San asking where you are. He somehow even got your neighbours (a sweet couple in their twenties who babysit Byeol sometimes) to ask you if you’re okay. As your finger hovers over the call button, debating whether to call him back, bright headlights shine behind your car and you stiffen. Your hand hovers over the pepper spray you keep in the dash as you press the call button in a panic. No matter what the disagreement was about, you know San would still come to your aid if you needed it.

“YN, open the door. I’ve been worried sick!” San’s voice crackles through the receiver and you spin around in your seat, squinting at the figure standing behind your car and your shoulders sag in relief.

“God, San, you scared the shit out of me!” you scold, leaning over to unlock the passenger seat and push the door open while hanging up the call. “Get in here.”

A haggard-looking San slides in, his eyes red-rimmed and mouth pressed into a thin line. The car that drove him turns and you look back in confusion before San starts explaining. “I wanted to give you space so I stayed at the party,” he starts explaining after a moment. “But I got worried and went to the apartment to find you. But you weren’t there, and I asked all your friends. I’m lucky you left your location on, and my friend gave me a ride.”

You wince. You forgot about turning off your location, although you’re glad you didn’t as it would’ve been more dangerous otherwise. “I’m sorry,” you mumble, turning your eyes to look out the windshield. “I just needed to clear my head so I went for a drive.”

There’s a long period of suffocating silence between the two of you when San finally speaks, his voice quiet. “I’m sorry,” he starts and your head snaps towards him, eyes wide. Of all the things you expected to fall from his lips, an apology is not one of those things. Not tonight, at least. “I was too pushy. I shouldn’t have ignored you, or interrupted your time with Juyeon. I should’ve talked to you like an adult.”

You laugh, resting your head on the steering wheel. “What an astute observation, San. However did you come to that conclusion?” Your exasperation is evident in your tone and San sucks in a breath at how done you seem. “Look, San. I’m sure you didn’t mean it to be that bad. But I’m just…tired. I’m tired of always wondering what is running through your mind, where I am in your list of importance. You date Yeseul, but break up with her over me. You give me the cold shoulder when I go on a date, but suddenly me being on a date is unacceptable. I just don’t know how to take anything.”

Against your will, tears start to drop onto your thighs, streaking down the skin and you sniff. “Shit,” San panics beside you. “I didn’t mean to make you cry.” He hands you a tissue and you take it with shaking hands, pressing your face into it as San tugs you closer, guiding you to lean against him.

He repeats soft little ‘sorry’s and leans his head atop yours, his tears falling onto your hair. The two of you stay in this position for a long while, no words are needed to understand the emotional moment.

“Let’s go home, YN,” San mumbles, his voice vibrating deep in your heart. “Let’s go home and we can talk tomorrow.”

You sniff again, tears run dry as you sit up and wipe your eyes. “Okay,” you whisper out. “Let’s go home.”

San stays attached to you throughout the drive home, his hand gripping onto your own hand whenever he can, and quickly wrapping you into a back hug as you walk up to the apartment. “I…cuddle with me tonight?” you ask, eyes flitting away from his face, missing the brilliant smile that spreads across it.

“I wouldn’t have it any other way,” he hums, walking with you to his room, and he lets you slide in first, the smell of his detergent filling your mind and your eyelids flutter shut already. San crawls in next to you, pulling you close.

“Good night, YN,” San mumbles as your breathing evens out. As you drift off into sleep, you swear you feel his soft lips on your forehead but you dismiss it as wishful thinking.

When you reawaken, San’s still curled up, your body covered by his, his breathing slow and gentle. You can’t help but blink a couple of times to make sure it isn’t a dream when his arms tighten around your waist and he shifts. “YN?” His morning voice is as rough as always, rumbling low in his chest.

“Hey, Sanah,” you greet him quietly, leaning up to meet his eyes blinking slowly at you like a cat’s. “Good morning.”

“Hi.” He dips his head to nuzzle into your neck, breathing in your scent. “I should probably explain myself.” His voice vibrates against your neck and you giggle softly at the ticklish feeling.

“That would be nice.”

San huffs, but he can’t complain about your snark. “I like you, YN. I don’t know when I started to, and I definitely didn’t realise I did until I started dating Yeseul. I did like her, but not as deeply as I thought I did. It was so easy to break up with her as soon as she made me pick between you and her. The answer came to me without a doubt in my mind as soon as the question left her lips, and yet I still didn’t realise my true feelings.” He laughs self-deprecatingly, and you stroke his hair comfortingly. “I didn’t realise why I was so pissed about you going out with Juyeon, and that’s why I was avoiding you. It’s a stupid reason, I know. But I just didn’t know why, not until I saw you at the party kissing him. I just wanted to be there instead of you. And I’m sorry, and I understand if you don’t like me anymore, but–”

“I love you.”

His head snaps up to stare at you after your sudden declaration, and after he registers your words a smile spreads across his face. He puffs out a breathy chuckle and you know his answer before he even says it. “I love you too.”

His eyes shine like you’ve hung the stars in the skies, and when they flit down to your lips, you know an unspoken question when you see it. You lean forward slowly, letting your eyes close once more when your lips meet his.

And damn, you were right about how San kisses. In a second, he deepens the kiss, bringing his hands up to cup your face while his tongue swipes at your lips. Shyly, you part your lips and he dives right in, licking into your mouth and biting at your lips.

“Sanah,” you gasp into his mouth, the sound swallowed by his plush lips. “Sanah–”

You repeat his name like a prayer as his lips travel down to your neck, littering wet kisses and bite marks all over your sensitive skin. “Fuck, baby, you’re so sweet to me,” San moans against your body. “Please, please, let me treat you right, make it up to you. Let me worship you.”

You whine as he laves his tongue over your breasts spilling out of the crop top you had worn last night. Any other time you would’ve stressed at how gross the clothes were but right now you could hardly even think about it. “Fuck, yes, please,” you beg when San nips at your cleavage, leaving a mark.

“Ah, already begging for me,” San groans, his hips pressing into your legs. “You’re so perfect.” His voice grows whiney as his sucks on your nipples, making your back arch.

His kisses move down your body until his breath is ghosting over your stomach and his hands are pawing at your pants, shoving them down as quickly as he can. He doesn’t have the same amount of minimal patience for your panties, and before you can react, he’s ripped them off your legs. “Choi San!” you scold, shifting to try and sit up but his grip on your hips stops you from moving too far.

“I’ll buy you a new pair,” San promises before diving right in and sucking at your clit without another moment’s hesitation. Your hips jerk and your core tightens at the sudden feeling as you throw your head back and moan so loudly it’s bordering on a scream

His ministrations on your dripping cunt have you wordless. His fingers are pressing into your hip bones, the sensation making you squirm. As soon as his tongue breaches your clenching hole your hands fly down to grasp at his hair. “Fuck–” you squeal, your legs attempting to close but San just pushes them apart again, busying himself in your folds.

“Fuck, you taste so good,” San groans, the vibrations sending shivers up your spine as he lets his teeth scrape against your clit. You can hardly focus on anything at the barrage of sensations filling you up, San fucking his tongue into you so well. Your thighs are shaking as you can feel yourself grow wetter and wetter against his face.

When you tilt your head down, he meets your eyes as he moves one of his hands to push a finger into your hole. “Shit–” your grip on his hair tightens impossibly. “Sanah–”

“Come for me, love,” San groans, and you let the dam break, screaming out his name until your voice is hoarse, and San licks up your release through it all.

When he finally pulls away from your twitching and sensitive core, his lips are covered in your glistening slick, thick globs of it sitting pretty on his chin. Without thinking, you pull him down and crash your lips against his, tasting yourself on his tongue. San groans as you lick his face clean, shoving your tongue deep into his mouth.

“Fuck, I need to fuck you right now or else I think I might go insane,” San growls, blindly fumbling in his nightstand to pull out a condom as he shoves down his sweats to reveal his hard, red cock. Without another thought, he opens the pack with his teeth, rolling the latex down his length with ease thanks to the precum dribbling down it.

He lines up, the tip of it kissing your hole, when you groan. You’re much too impatient for this, reaching down and holding him steady as you shift your body to sink onto his thick cock. “Shit, YN,” San grits out as you take him deeper and deeper until your cunt kisses his crotch. “You’re too much.”

You pant, shifting on his cock as you try to get used to the stretch. He’s not the longest you’ve had, but he’s thick and the stretch is almost too much. “You’re fucking talking, you fill me up so fucking well, Sanah.” You hiss as you throw your head back, the stinging melting into pleasure. “Fuck me already, San. Or should I go and find Juyeon to–”

You’re cut off by San thrusting into you so violently that you swear the bed shakes. “I don’t want to hear that fucking name out of your mouth anymore,” San commands, leaning forward until his body weight pins you down and your eyes roll back as he starts fucking into you with short, quick thrusts.

With every movement, you feel like you may break apart. You can hear every slick sound, the sound of it obscene, and yet all you want is more. Your previous release coats his cock so well, thick strings of it attaching to his hips.

His arms wrap around your waist, and before you can protest or do anything, he hoists you up until you’re sitting in his lap. You swear this angle makes him impale you even deeper, his cockhead kissing the perfect spot deep inside you. Your head drops to San’s shoulder, moaning against the fabric of his shirt. “Fuck, San, you’re so deep,” you moan high-pitched. “You’re so fucking good for me.”

San growls, pressing a kiss behind your ear. “You’re so tight for me, so much better than Yeseul. I saw you in the mirror, you know,” he whispers conspiratorially and you gasp and clench, snapping your head to look at him. “You’re not as sneaky as you thought, love. Did you touch yourself to the thought of me fucking you so well?”

You whine, words failing you, and San’s hips slow to a stop. You try your best to grind against him but his hands grip your waist, keeping you still. “Please–” you try to beg but San chuckles and nips at your earlobe.

“Answer me, YN.”

“Fuck– Yes!” you cry out, so eager for him to start moving again. “Wanted you to fill me with your cum so well until it was spilling out of me. Please, please, please, fuck me.”

“Hm.” And without any warning, San jerks his hips up into you, biting into your neck like a fucking vampire and you scream, hips stuttering as you come on his cock. You don’t think you’re making any coherent noises, just babbling into his neck as your bones become jelly from the overstimulation.

If you thought the sounds were obscene before, you swear they’ve become ten times worse as you lay limp against San’s body. He’s moving you up and down his cock like a doll and you pant, squeezing your eyes shut as you still feel aftershocks from your orgasm.

“Shit, you’re so warm around me, I’m gonna come,” San moans in your ear, his rhythm breaking as he drops your weight on his cock. You can feel him twitching inside you as his teeth sink into your neck once more. “God, I want to fill you up so badly, but that’s just going to have to wait, my love.”

After a long moment, he pulls out, groaning at your come coating the condom and his thighs. Without thinking, he dips his fingers in the mess and brings it to his mouth, licking it off like it’s the most delicious thing in the world to him. “Come here, baby,” he says in that beautifully raspy voice, and you lean forward, meeting his lips in another kiss.

This kiss is sweet and soft, but the lingering taste of your shared releases still permeates your taste buds. You sigh, leaning your head against his shoulder as he lays against the wall with you in his arms.

“I’m sorry,” he apologises again, pressing another kiss to the top of your head and it’s almost like he hadn’t fucked you like it was your last day on earth. “I won’t ever leave you again.”

You hum, turning your head to pepper kisses over his neck freckles. “I should be the one saying that. I love you, San. And I’ll always run to you with no hesitation.”

975 notes · View notes

rinhaler · 7 months ago

Text

Don’t You Love It When I Come Around?

Your relationship with him is so toxic. But no matter how hard you try to end things, he always worms his way back between your legs.

✧˖*°࿐: 18+ only, no minors. ✧. ┊ takuma ino x f!reader

Genre: porn! with a plot! Notes: in january i told u guys to send ino prompts and i would write my favourite and here it is, I'll add the ask below ! Warnings: 18+, fem!reader, dubcon (he's high), toxic relationship, exes to lovers?, rich boy!ino, dacryphilia, pussy eating ♡, light nipple play, vaginal sex, love making ♡, drool ♡, praise, slight orgasm denial, scratching, creampie ♡, manipulation, calls your pussy she/her, pet names (princess, baby/babe, gorgeous etc.) Words: 4.6k

He loves you.

He wouldn’t keep coming back to you with such urgency and wanton if he didn’t love you so ardently. But you ended things, and for the first time there was some finality to the breakup. You’re weak with your will and conviction, usually. You can’t take it anymore, you can’t.

Being second best to every other thing is his life is too hard.

His friends, his family.

Drugs.

You want to be his top priority, but you never will be. It weighs heavy in your heart whenever you’re with him, you don’t feel the type of love you want to feel from him. The kind where you know he’d kiss the ground you walk on and worship your very existence.

Fairy tale love, romance movie love.

He isn’t capable. And it’s taken you too long to realise it.

And usually, you crumble when he begs. His pleas and promises to change always sway you into believing him, despite knowing the truth that he’ll never change for you. He thinks money carries the same weight as love. He thinks his daddy’s credit card is the answer to all of his problems.

He wants to believe you can be bought.

He truly believes that he can buy your subservience with the same unearned money he uses to pay his dealer in fat wads of cash.

The day you met his dealer is the day you think things really began to fall apart between you. He wouldn’t refrain from making lewd comments about you, a fact that has stopped you from going with him to pick up since that first encounter. Your boyfriend didn’t chastise him, no. Instead, he played along. Joking that he’d be willing to share during your most intimate moments or even give you up completely to use as a payment instead of actually paying.

You broke up with him that night, leaving him alone with his friend. He didn’t even bother chasing after you to apologise. He didn’t care enough to check if you were okay, either. It hurt you to think that he was laughing it off with Sukuna, imagining him so nonchalant and uncaring broke your heart.

And you’re lucky you didn’t have to see that you were exactly right.

You can’t even remember why you forgave him that time, it should have been the final straw. He came over, sneaking into your window after your parents turned in for the night. It’s like he’d been waiting for all of the lights to go out. He lifted it, effortlessly, before he stepped inside. He hushed your protests and panic as you worried your parents would hear and before you knew it, he was your boyfriend again.

You jolt from your thoughts as you hear a struggle to your left. Your eyes linger on the window as you notice Takuma try his hardest to lift it open. He looks up and sees you staring, and you recognise something akin to fear sprawled across his pretty face.

He can’t remember the last time you locked the window.

“Baby, please.” he whispers. You shush him, determined to be strong as you approach the window and look at him sternly.

It’s the first time in over a week since you’ve laid eyes on each other, it should have been harder than it was. But you’ve had plenty of practice from when he goes on drink and drug infused benders and doesn’t even bother to send a measly text to let you know he’s alive.

Your fists clench tightly as you hold your parted curtains, though your will begins to dissipate as you see his soft brown stare up at you so pathetically. It feels like love. Maybe one more chance wouldn’t—

“Let me in, baby, ‘m so cold.” he tells you, squatting awkwardly on the roof as he tries to convince you to see things his way. Your blood begins to boil again as you remember how fucking entitled is. Entitled in life and entitled to you. Not this time. “I think it’s gonna—” the metal curtain pole hisses as you abruptly shut them and shut him out of your life for good.

“Go home, Takuma…” you sigh, your own purposiveness decaying as your body seems to crave him, you want to help him, despite knowing you’re being manipulated.

“Oh come on. Don’t do this, princess. It’s starting to rain!” he tells you.

You can’t listen to him. You grab your headphones from your desk and put them over your ears. You quickly scroll through your music library until you find your feel-good playlist and turn the volume to max. Sure you might go deaf in a few years, but it’s better than listening to him do all he can to get you to let him in.

The paranoia of not knowing what he’s doing or saying out there pricks at your skin like needles. Your senses are sharp despite cancelling one of them out. You begin to hear creaks of the window and calls of your name you’re certain you can’t be hearing. Your dad will come to berate you and him if he gets too rowdy. He wouldn’t risk it.

INO: Gonna start singing if you don’t let me in 💕

You learn forward in your seat as you read his message. He’s bluffing, he has to be. And yet, it scares you enough to pull your headphones down while your music continues to play through them. His knuckles are rapping against the window repeatedly without stopping as he waits for you to reply. He gives you a few minutes before the knocking stops, and while you hope he’s given up, you look down at your messages to see three dreaded dots appear.

INO: You’re so cute when you’re mad

INO: What song should I sing?

You freeze as you hear him hum, even over the sound of the rain pelting down against the roof shingles and the glass of your window. It’s a song you recognise instantly, the first song you danced to together when you met at a club two years ago.

“Come on baby, let me iiiiin~!” he speak-sings in tune with the beat and you know it’s only going to get worse. You try to hold strong, you do. The thought of giving him the satisfaction and ultimately the gateway to him winning you back makes your stomach churn, you don’t want to keep being this girl.

But you’ve always been weak when it comes to him.

The shriek of your curtains opening again puts a swift end to Takuma��s singing. His face lights up, and it makes you even angrier. He watches you intently as you unlock the window for him, but you step away to allow him the honour of opening it for himself.

“Shit baby, I’m soaked. Why didn’t you let me in sooner?” he asks, he wrings out his beanie on your bedroom carpet before tossing it aside completely. You roll your eyes as he shuts the window and begins to undress. “C’moooon, you’re not really giving me the silent treatment, are ya?”

You sigh and sit on your bed, carefully taking off your headphones and tucking them back into their protective casing. He barely even looks at you as you tuck your knees up to your chest and observe his every move.

“What do you want Takuma…” you pout. “I told you I don’t wanna see you anymore. Why are you here?” you ask.

He kisses his teeth, the sound makes your skin pinch together and you suddenly feel the harsh chill of the outside breaking in. He smiles at you, his sweet innocent face and warm brown eyes are almost enough to thaw you out.

“You didn’t really mean that, did ya?” he wonders. “Baby, I love you.” he kicks off his shoes and begins to undress. The audaciousness of him is never lost on you, but tonight he’s really something. He sits on the edge of your bed, his back facing you while he moves at a glacial pace.

He’s high. It’s obvious.

The sculptured muscles of his back flex and ripple as he takes off his socks, flinging them without a care in any direction before he stands up to look at you. You swallow, hard, as the buckle of his belt begins to clink before he pulls it out of the belt loops with one hand. Your eyes stay fixed on his as his arm extends and he lets it fall from his grip.

“Bet you’ve missed this dick, baby,” he smirks. “Can see it in your eyes. You’ve missed me.”

You roll your eyes despite his words hitting a nerve. His vision drops as he unbuttons his jeans, missing the way you squirm as you reposition yourself on the bed, tucking your knees further into your chest as you continue to stare while he takes off his clothes.

“Why do you play these games, princess? You know you always come back to me.”

“It’s not a game. I’m done with you, for real this time.” you protest. The way he bites his lip makes you angrier as he climbs on the bed with you, the mattress dipping as he slowly crawls towards you like he has so many times before.

He thinks, he knows everything you say it futile, regardless of how determined you are to not succumb to him for the umpteenth time.

“Take this off, gorgeous,” he demands as his fingers curl into the elastic waistband of your pleated skirt. You shake your head lightly, heart battering in your chest like a drum solo. He snarls, at that, like he hears your heart fighting against your weak defiance. “Suit yourself.” he mutters.

His hands wrap around your thighs and he drags you down the length of the mattress. It takes everything within you not to scream, the thought of being caught by your parents like this makes your whole body sear with heat.

“I’m—” you squeak, a little too loudly. You clear your throat and look at him, your eyes shaking with apprehension and anxiety. He wets his lips as he looks at you, waiting for you to continue. “I’m not fucking you. N-Not tonight. Not ever. Never again, Takuma… I m-mean it. We’re through!”

He sighs, a little pout forming on his lips as he crawls over your body. He cages you beneath him, looking down at you with a moue of dissatisfaction.

“What about a kiss baby? Can I have a kiss, just one?” he asks. His voice is soft and shallow. His honeyed eyes make you crumble as he stares at you with an intensity you’ve never felt from him before. Is it desperation? Is it panic that he’s really losing his grip on you? You can’t even look at him directly, each turn of your head causes him to angle his own so he can continue to stare you down.

And it works.

“Just a kiss.” you mumble, your whole body relaxes when he smiles. It’s such a sweet smile, the one that always adorned his gentle face when you first met. You’ve missed it, dearly.

Your eyes flutter closed as his lips land on yours. It’s chaste, quick, and leaves you wanting more.

“One more kiss, baby. Please?”

You nod, closing your eyes again. You startle when you feel the mattress shift dramatically. Words stay lodged in your throat as you see him on the ground, on his knees, looking up at you between your legs.

“No panties? Must’a known I was coming.” he grins. He flips up the material only slightly. His head disappears beneath the black pleats.

It’s pathetic, truly, the whimper that flees from you when he presses a delicate kiss to your clit. You cover your mouth with your hand, and you even surprise yourself when you feel tears roll down your cheeks.

“Can I kiss her again, princess? Wanna make out with her… do you want me to?” he wonders, repeating the same kiss again… again… and again.

“Y-Yes, Takuma please.” you moan. Your fingers card through his brunette locks, urging him closer to your heat. He complies, desperately. He slowly swirls his tongue over your swollen clit, humming contently as he encourages you to rest your legs over his shoulders.

The pleasure overwhelms you, and you allow yourself to lie comfortably against the mattress. Deep down you knew, you both knew, you were always going to end up like this.

You look between the valley of your breasts when you regain your stability. The shape of his head makes your own begin to spin as you see the material of your skirt move in tandem with his actions. The way he slurps and suckles on your flesh makes it all too clear, you’ll never be able to quit him. Not really, not when he’s so perfect when he’s like this.

Maybe he does love you, maybe all of the things he tells you when you shut him out for so long are indeed true. How else would he be able to ravage you with such vigour and passion? The only time you know him to have drive and patience is in moments like this.

He’s spoilt, but not with you.

He’s a giver, only for you.

Your back arches from the bed when the tip of his tongue targets a particularly sensitive spot between your folds. You moan, you whine, and it only encourages him more. He doesn’t stop when your thighs begin to clamp around his head. It’s more fuel to the fire, you have to smother any and all sounds that want to escape from your body with your hand.

And that, he sees as a challenge.

He holds under the bend of your knee and pushes it, so gently, towards your chest. And still, you feel like the air has been knocked from your lungs. Your skirt is forcibly moved by the action and his face is revealed once more. His eyes glitter and shimmer with expectance and desire as he sees your own face contort from the pleasure he’s forcing upon you.

His lips suction around your clit and he sucks like it’s his sole purpose on earth. Your eyes roll back, and you practically scream into your palm. His hand wanders purposefully to cup your breast. He squeezes experimentally, rubbing his thumb over the material of your top to tease your peaked nipple. The feeling of that is almost enough to make you unravel, your hips jerk at the contact, and he decides to take it further.

He breaches the edge of your crop top, desperate to feel your soft naked mound. Your eyes fill with water and spill consistently as he adds rolling your pebbled nipple between his thumb and forefinger to the intense amalgamation of pleasure.

“Ino… fuck,” you whisper pathetically, freeing your mouth momentarily to utter his name. To warn him. “I’m gonna cum.”

“… I know.” he mumbles before maintaining his efforts. His tongue swipes quickly over your clit, you whimper and your toes can’t help but curl as he doesn’t dare let up.

You grip the sheets below, desperate to hang onto something as you feel your body seconds from exploding. He shushes you between licks, drooling over your cunt as his jaw hangs low for you. You do all you can to keep quiet, but it’s a gargantuan task. Especially when you haven’t felt so good for so long, it’s near impossible.

Your legs begin to quiver as you cum. Your pussy gushes and coats his face further. And for once in his life, he isn’t ungrateful. He savours the taste and laps at your folds like a starving man. And after such a long time apart, that’s exactly what he is. He’s ravenous, he’s missed this. He’s missed you. And he’ll never not appreciate how delicious you are. And it’s all for him.

“Made such a pretty mess for me, baby,” he murmurs into your skin, repeatedly planting delicate kisses against your inner thighs. He doesn’t stop as he gets on top of you, showering your stomach in the same soft kisses. Each one infused with his desire for you. His urgency to force you to remember who you belong to and who you need.

Your legs spread beautifully for him, his throbbing cock rubs against your core, dampening the material of his underwear.

His eyes fixate on yours as he looks for permission to kiss you. And you give it, instantly, humming when his lips slot against yours. His tongue delves into your mouth, his hips begin to rut into you as you make out.

You run your fingers through his hair, interlocking your fingers to keep him close as you continue humping against each other. He breathes heavily as he breaks the kiss, staring down at you with a hurt look in his eye.

“What’s wrong?” you ask him quietly. It makes your blood run cold, the fear of wondering if he’s about to go back to the regular Takuma again. The one you’re all too familiar with, The one that always lets you down.

“… Don’t like it when you call me Ino, baby,” he tells you. It’s earnest, a twinge of disappointment laced in his words.

“All of your friends call you Ino, Ino.” you repeat. It makes your heart race to defy him, you seldom do. You’re the perfect girlfriend until you can’t take anymore, but this is different. You’ve never felt bold enough to do this, to attempt to rile him up.

Never.

“Stop that.” he growls, kissing you again. “You’re not my friend. You’re my girlfriend, alright? Say it. Please.”

“I t-told you… I don’t want you back. Only let you in so you wouldn’t wake my parents.”

He stops. He stands on his knee and looks down at you with a little frown, his lower lip almost jutting as he hears you. You can’t tell if he’s actually sad, or if it’s merely panic. “Do you mean that? You don’t want me back?”

You shake your head, despite it being the opposite of what you want. It’s almost as if you’ve been possessed.

“… So you wouldn’t care if I left right now? You don’t want to fuck?” he continues. You can barely look at him, you’ve never seen him like this before. He might actually be upset, he’s experiencing regret for the first time in his entire life.

“Well… if you wanna go, I won’t stop you Takuma.” you shrug, it comes a little too easily. It feels like a dream, or a nightmare to Takuma. He can’t help but stare as he realises he’s lost his control of you.

A hand rests on your knee, while the other carefully rubs the lower half of his face. He wants to ask again. And again. Is that really what you want? But he’s terrified to even think it, let alone say it. Because what if you are sure? He won’t know what to do, he’s never known you to be like this before. Maybe he took too long to come over this time, he got cocky. Assumptions and greed consumed him. He came back to you when he was ready, but he hadn’t accounted for the fact you might grow a backbone in that time.

He lowers himself again, your noses barely touching before he kisses the tip of it.

“You love me, I know you do baby,” he says, faux confidence lingering in his tone. Though you don’t notice, to you, he’s just confident. The sound of tender kisses littering your cheeks is the loudest sound in the room, even louder than his desperate whispers. “You gotta love me… because I love you. So much, baby, please forgive me.”

He doesn’t let up, like he’s transferring a love potion embedded from his lips to seep into your skin. You mewl at the sensation, never knowing him to be this affectionate before. You know why, the agonising realisation that he lost you has him resorting to this last ditch effort.

And you hate him, because it’s working.

“I’ll always love you more than anyone, y’know. I promise. I’ll be better this time…” he tells you, the same sorry line he’s told you so many times before. “Can I put it in, babe? Please… Please let me feel you close one more time, if ya really mean it.” he begs. He moves his lips to yours, hoping to silence you with a kiss to remember. There’s a hunger to it, a desperate craving that he can’t satiate.

He needs your help.

He needs you.

“L-Last time, okay? I mean it, Takuma, I won’t take you back.”

He stopped listening to you after he heard you agree, honestly. Reaching down to pull his boxers just enough for his cock to spring free. He moans, it’s akin to a whine as it slaps against his abdomen. He’s been hard since he got that first kiss from you, and tasting your slick made him ache for you.

He jerks himself a few times before he slips himself inside of your cunt. His cockhead resting carefully in your entrance. His body moves closer to yours as he sinks in further, you both moan in tandem as you stretch and swallow his cock oh so gloriously.

“S-See, baby? See how perfect I fit? ‘Cause you love me so much, and I love you.” he explains gently holding your jaw in his grip so he can force you to look at him. His hips begin to roll, but he can’t let you enjoy it. Your attempt to throw your head back in pleasure with your eyes scrunched closed is thwarted as his hips instantly slow. “You gotta say it. Say it back, princess.”

“I love you, Takuma…” you say, defeated. “You know I’ll always love y-you.”

“Yeah?” he smiles widely, moving his hips once more. “Always gonna be mine?”

“… always.” you nod.

He kisses you again, his body weight almost suffocating you as he rests on top of you. He fucks every ounce of passion and longing into you. He covers your mouth, sensing it’s too much. But he can’t stop. You don’t want him to, you’ve never felt so whole with him.

You’re too fucked out to notice how badly your bed is creaking. Even with your moans trapped behind Takuma’s palm, he’s sure your parents will know he’s here by now.

“Fuuuuck, you’re choking my fuckin’ dick, baby. Gonna make me cum too fast.” he tells you, kissing your forehead as he slams his hips into yours. “So tight for me… my p-perfect girl, aren’t ya?”

You nod desperately, clenching around him at his every word.

“Want you to cum for me… but,” he rests his forehead against yours, alternating his movements to slow and deep rather than hard and fast. It has you drooling against his palm, but he doesn’t mind. He likes you, loves you, when you’re his braindead princess. “I only make my girlfriend cum.”

Your eyes widen in horror as you realise what he’s trying to do. You wish you could say you regret letting him fuck you again. But it’s too good, you’re lost to it. You’re almost dumb enough to agree.

Almost.

He moves his hand and cups your face, imploring you to look him in his eyes and tell him you’re his again.

“I c-can’t,” you sniffle. “Hurts too much being—”

“Hey, hey, hey, don’t say that, princess.” he interrupts, not wanting to hear your thought in full. “Don’t say things you don’t mean. You love me, yeah? Always gonna be my girl. Mine.”

And as if on command, you nod in acceptance. Because he’s right, you will always be his girl. Whether in an official capacity or not. Even the days you’re separated, he’s always on your mind. You worry that weeks, months or even years could pass without him and he’d still be on your mind.

A particular intense stroke inside of your gummy walls makes your body jolt and a heavy moan tears through your throat. He looks down, admiring where to two of you meet before searching your eyes.

“There, baby?” he asks, experimentally thrusting into the same spot. He grins when he hears you keen once again for him, prodding it again and again until your eyes spill over with tears from the blinding pleasure. “Theeeere she is, right there. Bet you wanna cum real bad, ‘cause I do.”

“I do!” you agree, cupping his face gently before kissing him. “I love you, Takuma, please don’t stop,” you whimper.

“I won’t baby, promise.” he assures you. It’s imperceptible, and he’s glad, you can’t see the relief washing over his entire body as he feels safe once again. You’re his, again. There’s nowhere else you should be but with him. “C-Can’t let my girl down, can I?” he grins.

And after everything. All of the hurt, all of the effort, all of the determination, you’re his again. All of that defiance was for nought. And yet, you’re smiling. Your hands helplessly grip his body, nails digging into his shoulder blades as you scratch, attempting to ground yourself.

His lips find yours, eager to silence himself as he brings you both closer and closer to your demise. His breaths are heavy, his nostrils flaring as he continues to pummel into you. Your kiss is sloppy, but perfect. The messy passion heightens your pleasure, somehow. His tongue finding your own reminds you that there’s no one in the world you’d rather be doing this with.

Every plunge of his length against your sweet spot feels like love. Pure, unadulterated, love. Everything you’ve ever wanted, ever needed, from Takuma this time.

And as you cum together, moaning into each other’s mouths, that feels deeper. He looks into your eyes as he fills you to the brim, your walls clench around him, desperate to keep him inside and milk him for all he’s worth. You never want this feeling to end, he’s the man of your dreams.

He kisses your neck as he continues to fuck himself inside of you, making sure to deposit every last drop of his love into you. He feels it too, it feels different to how it usually is.

Better, somehow.

The pecks of his lips slow as he ventures towards yours again. Each kiss is interpolated with ardour. He doesn’t want to risk stopping for fear of all of this coming undone. He doesn’t want you to see sense, again. Despite what you might think, he is in love. A love so intense he couldn’t begin to explain.

He eventually pulls away, bracing himself for what you might say.

But nothing comes.

He’s grinning from ear to ear because you don’t say a word. Not one. But your expression says it all. You look exhausted, but fulfilled. You look beautiful as bliss ravishes your drained form. However even without all that, he only needs to look into your eyes to see it.

You really are his girl again.

He can practically see the hearts shimmering in your irises. You’re looking up at him like you’ve fallen for that signature Takuma charm once again, but are you really so foolish? Even he is a little surprised.

He wants to do better, of course he does. And maybe this time he’ll really try. He doesn’t mean to let you down so often, it’s not like he wants to do it.

That’s just the type of guy he is.

The type to make promises he can’t keep.

anon: okay but imagine ino sneaking in your bedroom every once in a while and fucking you into forgetting he's an absent boyfriend, he's always smoking with his friend (plug! sukuna *cough cough*) he's a trust fund baby, and the worst boyfriend ever but dick game is so good he has you thinking you can fix him, so every time you let him hit you are looking at him with heart eyes and it almosttt makes him want to do better

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blue-mood-blue · 1 year ago

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I’ve grown to appreciate the aus where Shen Yuan enters the story as “Shen Yuan” - same name, probably similar face, generally able to interact with PIDW as himself and change the story through his added presence. I like the sense of “if only you’d been here, things might have been better the first time around” of it all.

And I was thinking, it’s a funny coincidence in that scenario that someone named Shen Yuan gets put into… another Shen Yuan. What are the chances? What a weird twist of fate that Airplane would pick out the name that his most dedicated critic could slip into seamlessly.

What about a version where it’s not coincidence at all?

Airplane goes to school with a kid named Shen Yuan. He’s prickly and hard to approach and a little intense, but Airplane is persistent. In fairness, Airplane is relentless - and maybe it’s a good thing that they end up being friends, because they’re a little too much for anyone else to handle. They balance each other out. They’re the “weird kids” in class and they’re okay with that, because even when they don’t have any words for it, they know they’re not like their classmates, not really. That’s okay; they don’t want to be.

Recesses and breaks are consumed with the elaborate stories that Airplane wants to tell, and all the holes Shen Yuan pokes into them. It’s not mean-spirited, though, even though Shen Yuan isn’t the kind to temper his words. It’s passionate. He cares about those stories the way Airplane cares about them, and it can’t be mistaken for anything else when they lean together conspiratorially across the lunchroom table. They’ve both got notebooks filled with details and characters and monsters. Shen Yuan’s practically got a whole bestiary sketched out in wobbly childhood attempts at art, entries fervently scrawled beside them. Airplane prattles out plots nonstop, always with the promise of shining eyes and being asked “what happens next?”

They come up with a whole world together. Airplane’s going to write about it someday. Shen Yuan is going to read every word.

Shen Yuan misses school. Shen Yuan starts missing school a lot.

Airplane goes to the hospital room instead. He doesn’t think to worry, because Shen Yuan is okay - that’s what he says. He looks okay, and he’s a kid, and it doesn’t feel real that anything bad should happen to a kid. He doesn’t think to worry. He doesn’t think to say goodbye.

It’s one of the older Shen brothers who catches him on the way up to the room one day, in the hallway just outside - snaps at him to go the fuck home, and when Airplane hesitates, pushes him into the elevator and tells him not to come back. “Tells” is a generous way to describe the way the words come out - a growl, a hiss, the sound an animal would make when a hand got too close to a wound.

(It’s not fair to name a villain after him, even if the name never really comes up in the story. He wasn’t trying to be mean. He’d lost a brother minutes before, and he was getting his brother’s friend out of the way so he didn’t have to… see. It isn’t fair, but then, none of it is fair.)

Death feels very real after that.

The notebooks get shoved into a closet, and it’s not until Airplane’s moving out and one falls on him from a high shelf that he thinks about it again. He’s written things, lots of things, but nothing as ambitious as this - nothing as important. It could be good, he considers. He’d promised. Shen Yuan wanted to read it.

The problem was that no one else does, not for a long time, not until Airplane has whittled himself and his art into a corner and into such an unfamiliar shape that he has to wonder how it’s still his own face he sees in the mirror. He has to eat. He has to pay rent. Shen Yuan would yell at him, but Shen Yuan isn’t there to yell at him, and who cares. Who cares if it could have been better? The people who actually are here love it, and it’s paying his bills, and sometimes stories don’t go the way they’re supposed to and the world is fucking unfair. It doesn’t matter.

(It does. But he shoves that thought away along with styrofoam cups and soda bottles to the bottom of a garbage bag.)

Authors are not gods and their power is limited, but Airplane exercises just a sliver of what he’s been granted and gifts an inconsequential sort of immortality. He thinks about making him a rogue cultivator, maybe the kind that goes around documenting beasts and compiling his findings. He thinks about making him someone too powerful for death to touch, or too important to threaten, but when Airplane looks at the world he crafted and everything that’s become of it, it feels like the kindest thing he can do for Shen Yuan is a childhood where he’s loved, and a death that’s peaceful. What does it say about that world, that he’d kill off his best friend too early again instead of making him live there?

(The best writing he ever does is the only, shining moment of humanity that his scum villain ever displays: a lament about death that comes too early, about a brother gone too soon. The commenters praise him. The commenters flatter over how real the emotions feel. The commenters don’t get any response from Airplane on that chapter.)

Death is incredibly real when it comes for him too early, too, still hovering over his keyboard with the story technically finished and incredibly incomplete. Airplane could tell himself that’s because the written version can never be the version in the writer’s head, always shifting and with every possibility still on the table, but he knows better than that. The System knows better than that, with its condescending message about “improving” his writing and ��closing plot holes” and “achieving his original vision”...

…and he’s a child again. He’s a child in his own story, he’s Shang Qinghua now without the benefit yet of a peak or cultivation or anything, and maybe he’s a little bitter, and a little scared, and…

And Shen Yuan - with longer hair, with robes, with a couple of older kids watching him from across the street, but undeniably the prickly little boy who used to sit down imperiously across from him and tell him everything that was wrong with the chuck of writing that had been handed to him last period, but with that smile that said he was only invested because he knew it could be better and they were going to make it better - marches up to him with a fire in his eyes and a frown that warns of a coming tirade.

“You told it wrong,” is the first thing he says.

Shang Qinghua wants to ask how him how he’s here, how this is possible, or maybe laugh because, yeah - yeah, Shen Yuan has no goddamn idea how wrong he got absolutely everything.

(Shang Qinghua wants to say “I missed you” and “why did you leave so soon” but he’s here now. He’s right here.)

“I know,” he says instead. “I’m sorry. It all kind of… spiraled out of control.”

Shen Yuan frowns, but then it dissipates the way it always does, and his eyes shine with ideas the way they always used to. “That’s okay,” he relents, grabbing for his hand. “We’ll fix it. We’ll make it what it was supposed to be.”

#scum villain self saving system #svsss #shang qinghua #shen yuan #airplane shooting towards the sky #this got more into the feelings than i thought it would #surprising no one #anyway just! childhood friends au! as a reason for a shen yuan insert!#obviously he is not going to die as a child in this version #shang qinghua would not have that nope not again #also pls consider poor shen jiu who looks at this child that shen yuan has picked out for a best friend like '...really? that one??'#(it's up to you if he's shen yuan's actual brother from his first life)#(put there's a part of me that likes the idea that shen jiu also gets a second chance to spend more time with his brother)#a second chance for them to grow up together!#THAT SAID #RIP TO SHANG QINGHUA #WHEN SHEN YUAN IS OLD ENOUGH TO LEARN ABOUT ALL THE PAPAPA #the LOOKS shang qinghua is going to get #anyway here have a thing because I CANNOT add another au to my drafts thank you and goodbyyyyye

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freelancearsonist · 6 months ago

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hunger

➔ Lucy MacLean (Fallout) x AFAB!Reader

➔ 0.8k words

➔ You teach your best friend something new.

➔ Rated MA // oral (reader receiving), a little bit of internalized homophobia, reader is afab (female anatomy, no pronouns used), two (2) okie dokies

➔ This happened bc @ozarkthedog challenged me to write some lucy porn with no plot (thank you my love <3) i have this condition where i can't write anything less than 1k so i was shook this came to me so easily hopefully it doesn't suck fjsfjslfjs

“I’ve never…”

“We don’t have to,” you quickly counter. The last thing you want to do is pressure Lucy into new territory.

She looks up at you from her position against the pillows with the biggest, prettiest brown eyes you’ve ever seen. “I want to,” she says with an earnest nod that sends her long hair out around her head like a dark halo. “I really want to.”

“Okay.”

This goes against everything you’ve been taught since the two of you were kids. Sex is for reproduction, not pleasure. It’s nothing more than goal-based. It’s all bullshit, of course, and you’ve never been quiet about your thoughts on that–much to the quiet chagrin of the leadership. You hadn’t realized until recently, though, that your childhood best friend feels the same way.

In a flash she’s got you trapped in her arms so she can roll on top of you, drawing a surprised gasp from your lips at the quick flip. She’s a lot stronger than she looks.

“I’ve never been on this side,” she murmurs, breath warm against your neck. “You’re gonna have to show me what to do.”

Your breath catches in your throat, and at first no words come. How long have you wanted to be in this exact position with this exact girl? How could words even hope to convey all the thoughts rushing through your brain right now? “I can do that.”

“Okie dokie.”

Her lips are so soft. There’s a heady contrast between her firm grip on your hips and the feather-light way she makes her way down the expanse of your stomach. There’s confidence in everything Lucy Maclean does, but she looks up at you now as she kisses your hip and there’s nerves swirling in those chocolate brown irises. Underneath her self-assuredness, there’s always been a fear of failure. It’s something you’ve comforted her through a lot over the years.

“Do I just… go for it?”

You can’t help smiling at that wide-eyed eagerness to learn and to please. “You know what feels good to you?”

She nods, fingers unconsciously massaging your spread thighs. She’s already so good at this without even realizing it.

“Start with that, and we’ll go from there.”

She nods again, and that look crosses her face. It’s one you’ve been familiar with since you were both in velcro shoes–sheer determination, resolution to rise to a challenge. You’ve always admired that look. Lucy “never backs down” MacLean is a badass, and you’re lucky to call her your best friend.

She starts with light little kitten licks to your clit, whining as her hips shift to grind against the mattress from your taste alone. She’s a little light on the pressure but you moan anyway to show her she’s on the right track. “That’s it baby, a little harder…”

“I won’t hurt you?”

Your hand comes down to cup her cheek, silently reassuring. “No, honey, you can be rough with it. Feels so good.”

She’s always taken constructive criticism in stride–she pulls away for just a moment to readjust her grip on your spread thighs, and then she returns with vigor. This time, when she seals her lips around your clit and sucks, your moan isn’t even remotely fabricated.

“Like that?” She asks, a proud smile flickering at the corners of her lips as she lets her tongue trail down to taste you properly.

“Yeah, Lucy, fuck.”

“You taste good,” she murmurs into your cunt, matter-of-fact. You can’t help smiling, even through the whine that escapes you as she returns to your clit.

“You’re doing great,” you praise as your fingers tangle into her hair. So soft, so well cared for. Always prim and proper–you love that you get to be the one to unwind her like this.

She’s a remarkably fast learner–in just a few quick minutes, and she has you whining and bucking your hips on the edge of a precipice.

“Oh god Lucy, I’m gonna–”

But you don’t get to finish your sentence, because she doesn’t relent. Her lips seal around your clit and she doesn’t let up until you’re gushing, simultaneously trying to push her away and pull her closer.

“Wow,” she breathes reverently. “Was that good?”

“Incredible,” you sigh. Your bones feel like liquid–it’s all you can do to pull her up into a messy kiss. The taste of your own arousal on your beautiful best friend’s tongue is nothing short of euphoric.

She keeps her mouth locked to yours for a long moment, then you can feel her lips twist into a broad grin. “I want to do it again.”

“Easy killer,” you say with a breathy little chuckle. “It’s your turn first.”

Her eyes widen for a moment, and then she’s nodding her head rapidly. “Okie dokie.”

➔ beta: @ozarkthedog ; dividers: @saradika-graphics

➔ Want to see more from me in the future? Follow @freelancearsonist-updates and turn on post notifications to be notified when I post new fics!

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#lucy maclean #lucy maclean x reader #lucy maclean smut #lucy maclean fanfic #fallout fanfic #fallout #cece writes

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greeniegaes · 7 months ago

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Back at it agains with another svsss au im pulling out of my (slightly) sleep deprived brain

Basically yada yada everything happens as normal UP UNTIL the immortal alliance arc. SQQ gets this searing headache and the system just keeps popping up with errors, so while they are all fighting the spider hoard the system just kinda snaps and breaks. SQQ suddenly feels like he’s hit by a truck, his body starting to act like his sickly Shen Yuan body and his cultivation is tying itself into dead knots and every bone in his body feels like it’s locking up. There’s no system to blame for things as he and LBH confront MBJ and he just has to do his hardest to survive with just his spiritual sword.

And then the worse thing happens, Xiu Ya shatters.

SQQ panics at this, continuing to try his best fighting people off and eventually MBJ leaves *hooray* except not really because all the system errors are getting louder and louder in his head, and everything is blue and blaring and he might be bleeding and he can’t understand what LBH is saying even though he is right there, shaking his body and crying.

And then the abyss opens. He suddenly has the choice. He can send LBH, his white little sheep, down there to continue on with the PIDW plot, or he can… not do that.

So he pushes LBH.

Away from him. Away from the abyssal rift, only for him to be the one that falls though. He had prepared various lesson plans, life advice, what skills people to work on and so much more once he got without-a-cure, just incase he slipped up one day and couldn’t protect himself. So SQQ was satisfied as he knew his peak would be taken care of if LBH opened a specific drawer, everyone could still be taught by the hall masters and also have some future help prepared for each of them.

So SQQ let’s himself fall into the abyss, watching his student’s horrified expression as he plummets. He hears the system disconnect from LBH as he falls, all of the glowing blue error messages and pop ups instantly go away and he’s left in the dark as he sinks further and further into the abyss.

Surprisingly, he wakes up. He landed in the same field of flowers that are the reason LBH didn’t die in the original, they are filled with celestial qi in a place meant to be horrible and deadly. The one good thing about this place. He lays there for awhile and lets the plants essence fix up his meridians.

Then he has to experience the same horrifying things the protagonist did in person, fighting off each beast and trying his damn hardest to survive. It takes him a while, fighting and walking his way through what’s practically hell on earth, slaying beasts ten times his size, making sure not to fall into the trappings of demonic plants. He cuts his long hair, he thinks he will never see his peak again, so what do filial ties matter when you’re barely surviving. Sometimes the worse thing is his own mind, he feels a heavy layer of guilt to himself for so willing going along with the system. He sometimes forgets it’s not his fault too, that he was threatened to return to a dead body if he didn’t do as he was supposed to. But he’s happy sometimes too, he goes back to that field of flowers, laying in them and basking in his memories of a happier LBH, a LQG that isn’t dead, a Qing Jing peak full of song and happy healthy students.

He ascends from the abyss that day. He doesn’t know how or why but he wakes up in the same field of flowers, the sky above him no longer a damning black with red cracks seeping light in. it’s blue, soft, it hurts his eyes almost to look at it. It hurts so much but he can’t look away. He picks himself up, looking at all the grime and blood on himself and weeps in relief that he can go home. He hides his face and asks people where he is, somewhere in HHP territories, and begins to make his way back to his sect. Once he gets to his peak he sits down softly at the gate, it’s night time and there haven’t been many people about. He basks in the feeling of being home, leaning his head against the tall bamboo pole as he falls asleep.

He’s glad tomorrow is a new day, when he can see his family and just go back to his life.

(in the years he’s been gone all of CQS has been in some kind of mourning. LBH found all the letters from his shizun and they made all the disciples of QJP weep. Some of them took the advice given and left, some of them stayed and took care of a lordless peak. None of the hall masters or disciples were qualified to step up, and when the issue was raised even the peak lords agreed he shouldn’t be replaced. It was LQG who found him at the gate, going to visit the sword shrine in the bamboo house after an expedition, going to leave another fan to rot at the shrine’s foot. instead he heaved up his shixiong, hair not even reaching his shoulders, hands callused and dirty, and brought him back to the bamboo house, waking LBH in the process. Once morning light came everyone would know that their lost peak lord came home, but first they had to get the doctor to make sure he actually got through the night)

#svsss #shen qingqiu #shen yuan #svsss shen qingqiu #svsss au #greeniegaes #text post #alternative universe ideas #scum villian self saving system #scum villain #Yuan in Abyss AU

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mamaclownhunter · 23 days ago

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Genuinely tho- if there was a third Transmigrator: Liu Mingyan- would be the funniest.

Like she pulls a Jason Mendoza from the good place and just stays quiet. She isn’t expected to win her first fight and is over all left alone.

HECK her story has already changed because her brother- who is a pretty boy omg- is over all left alone from the plot and the story doesn’t actually require her to be openly affectionate.

So here you have whatever orientation Liu Mingyan- just living her best life in SVSSS. She is trying to figure out where the plot is going- and Luo Binghe and the Scum Villian are having a cute 180 on their relationship.

Liu Mingyan is a shameless Danmei lover. THE SCUM VILLAIN TOOK DEADLY POISON FOR THE IMMUNE HALF DEMON WHO CAN CURE HIM WITH PAPAPA she is *viberating* with ideas of this wasn’t actually kinda scary in real life.

She kinda can sit back, quietly learn the ropes be the bad ass this character is with the added bonus of getting the war god as a brother. Who again- is alive. So her whole romance plot either needs to be changed or is void now. Either way she is more invested in the Shen Quingqui and Luo Binghe situation- and then SAID BROTHER is now a RIVAL. (Be still her Danmei heart).

Luo Binghe and her are assigned to do a night hunt (organized by Shen Quingqui- this is his otp)- she is kinda not wanting to be a creep and feeling out the waters bc she doesn’t want to ship someone like a platonic found family thing. But when she is like baiting and asking what he finds ideal in a partner he one hundred percent is like “someone who is peerlessly beautiful and a master in their craft, someone who is kind and will give wisdom to everyone around them, someone who is self sacrificing even to lowly ones who don’t deserve it-.” “Like Shen-Shishu?” Cue the biggest blush and she is just nodding. “I see…. Well since you are still young you probably can’t do too much in romance.” “…. No?” (She doesn’t want to say he was accused of grooming a child in the original but she is also reading inbetween the lines and has snuck around and sees how he treats both her and Yingying- he has doting older brother vibes hard core and openly is pushing Binghe to girls his age. So she doubts that is an actual claim)

“No…. BUT if you make a foundation showing him you will grow up to be a dutiful partner in the future! You can always make him rely on you so when you are old enough to court him he really CAN’T consider anyone else because who else can do all the things he needs but you?” And Binghe is labeling her as his new best friend in his head and she internally is like (‘though if he throws you into the abyss and you come back angry and yearning that is also a fun Danmei’ which goes into her note book for future ideas)

She never interacts with Peerless Cucumber or Master Airplane. She doesn’t have to. She is making friends, playing her own brand new story- writing so much fanfiction with people who are kinda characters to her. She kinda is hella vibing though.

Binghe is chill to her even post blackening- scolding Sha Hualing for kidnapping her. Liu Mingyan only sticks around long enough to ask him how he has been. The ‘hey man, yeah I am got caught again but only so I can get these people home, how are you holding up?, still trying to revive Shen Shishu?’ She knows her Brother’s side of the story and knows he will only get worst if she also hangs around to comfort her friend so she does the return people home side for him. (She still shamelessly writes her fanfiction. Even if she knows that isn’t what is going on she is trying to keep sane here)

Listen how funny if post Mushroom Shizun getting snatched and after Shang Quinghua’s advice Binghe ALSO kinda goes to her when his spies tell him she leaves CQM, he comes out of a portal walks up to her tells her the advice he was given and she is like “shockingly- I am not against Shang Quinghua’s advice- I do need to know more about him and Mobei-Jun’s relationship now thank you- and honestly? You should for now Pin Shen-Shishu down to show him you are serious about what you want.” (Internally she is chanting freak4freak Shen Quingqui DIED came back and willingly left with Binghe swept in his arms like a damsel with her YA angry love interest)

(If she is also gay and kinda was super gay after fighting Sha Hualing- that is for whoever me ships that)

It is like really post plot and she is part of the Human partners of the general club does she connect that Shen Quingqui and Shang Quinghua are transmigrators too and she just breaks character. Shen Quingqui was low key doting on her as usual- Shang Quinghua was complaining. It got dropped she was always the favorite out of all of them- and she was like “of wives?? Sure but like I am so gay and this is better then proud immortal demon way not going to lie my guy”

Cue freak out.

Cue her learning who they are and who she is.

She has been here the whole time it is so funny.

Cue demon partners wondering if this “meme” thing is contagious bc now Liu Mingyan is laughing with them about it.

#Liu Mingyan being a fanfiction author will never not be funny to me #third transmigrator au #this got away from me #I ship BingLiuShen so #if LMY sees that opportunity she is pouncing and hardcore wing manning for her brother #the RIVAL aLSO GETS THE BOYS #SIGN HER THE FUCK UP #she refuses to write the fanfiction bc fictional or not that is her brother #but she wants them happy #idk the ship name for Sha Hualing/Liu Mingyan #but it is kinda minor #for other ship interpretations #svsss #shen quingqiu #luo binghe #bingqui

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pinecipitation · 5 months ago

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I am once again up at your ass and asking for smiling friends hcs,,,, can I get fucking uhhhh Charlie and Alan with a crush who can't help but infodump their interests?? Talking about sitting then down and forcing them to watch their favorite movie and just rambling. (This is totally not me projecting in the slightest, nuh uh) THANK YOU WIFE I HOPE THIS IS OKAY TO ASK MWAH

SMILING FRIENDS X GN!READER

HELLO WIFE YES THANK YOU FOR THE ASK!! LEAN IN I HAVE A KISS READY FOR YOU

word count: 800+

warnings: none!!

CHARLIE:

- my guy doesn’t know about shit honestly, I feel like just how in the president election episodes he’d be like “idk idc” but in the end he gets an opinion with the more info you talk about

- of course because it’s YOU, he’d listen though

- you’re more into movies and shows and games than he is, so if the moment is ever dull he’d immediately hit you with the “….soooo,, any new recommendations?”

- boy do you have them

- he honestly enjoys the way you light up talking about the media you’re into, even if he isn’t quite retaining the information

- he doesn’t mind asking about it again just to hear your piece

- he thinks it’s sort of sweet that you get so heavy into a piece of media that you’d defend it to the ground, especially if its media that isn’t too widely liked or known or have much of a fanbase. he thinks it’s cool that he’s that person for you, like he’s getting insider information from a reliable source

- he finds himself seeing the media in the wild and immediately thinking about your thoughts on it, if he sees a figure of a character you don’t like or a poster of an arc you loved he’d be sure to point it out to himself

- will find himself going “man, fuck this character” to himself because of you, immediately shaking his head and wondering what was wrong with him. He didn’t even know the character, but he subconsciously has an opinion on them because of you

- back to you though, he would have a hard time physically sitting down to watch or read what you’re into, or try out a hobby you like, but when the moment comes where you offer watching the series with him he will jump on it without a second thought

- you do talk and pause to rewind certain parts in it, which he usually wouldn’t like people doing, but it doesn’t matter to him. it’s not like he’s watching the show anyways, he’s too fixated on you and how close you two are on his couch

ALAN:

- now he would ACTUALLY know what you’re talking about and pay attention to the movies and series

- usually he would just state he’s seen it or doesn’t care for it, but he’s breaking habits if it’s something you’re visibly excited about

- of course he’s happy to rewatch it though

- “no, I don’t know about it, is it good?” he’s seen the movie four times

- alan the type of man to stare at you blankly and resist the urge to add his own opinions and facts, but stays quiet for the plot

- he does genuinely enjoy having you so vocal about a subject you’re so passionate about, you’re somehow one of the only people he doesn’t get too overstimulated around, plus this way he doesn’t have to talk as much

- the day you offered a movie marathon at his place was a turning point, him taking the day off before just so he can clean and make the place acceptable, going the lengths to get usual movie snacks and blankets and such. this, and him hiding his books and dvds so that you wouldn’t stumble on them and find out he’s been pretending this entire time

- for the sake of the plot we’re ignoring alan being a morning person, in this universe he’s a night owl hence the eye bags

- the marathon goes on for later in the night than you both anticipated, after the first several hours and rambles of explaining you find yourself more and more tired and you pause the movies less and less

- it doesn’t take Alan long to notice that you fell asleep just like that, the blanket around the two of you and the bowl of chips discarded beside you

- he doesn’t care about that though, what he does care about is your head centimeters away from his shoulder

- not feeling even a little tired, he pauses the movie and carefully grabs his phone, sure not to move himself or you and writes down the time and place he paused, sure that you’d want to continue in the morning or another day. he’s also sure to write a small summary of where you two left off, now that you both “watched it together” he can talk back in infodump conversations and not give away that he knows the parts you two didn’t watch

- he’s quick to move when you shift in your sleep, him carefully but rapidly moving his hand from between you two and scooping his shoulder right under your head. you didn’t seem to wake or notice, a small lazy smile of success on his face as the two of you spend the rest of the night on the couch, him on his phone and you resting peacefully on his shoulder.

#pine smiles ⍋#thank you teddy for always getting me out of writers block #teddy my inspo fr #smiling friends #alan smiling friends #smiling friends charlie #smiling friends x reader #smiling friends pim #pride month #lgbt pride

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sweet-as-an-angel · 2 years ago

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Hii, I was wondering if you could possibly write about what kind of p*rn you think Ghost and König like? (And other characters if you want! )it’s just been floating around my head for days and you’re one of my favorite writers. If not, that’s totally fine! 💛💛💛

MW2 and Their P0rn Preferences

Warnings: 18+, Heavy Mentions of P0rn0graphy (none shown), Mention of Poor Mental Health, P0rn w/ Feelings, P0rn w/o Feelings, BDSM, Knife Play, Breeding Kink, Historical P0rn, Mention of Hardcore Lesbian P0rn, Mentions of Masturbation, University Lecturer/Student Relationship, Body Worship, Daddy Kink, Sadism, Mentions of Torture P0rn, Mention of Sex Tape, Mention of Insecurity, Mention of Alcohol, No Pronouns used for Reader except ‘You’, Profanity, etc.

A/N: Tysm, Anon <3 ! Also, I’ve changed any mentions of the subject material to p0rn as to skirt around any potential censorship issues.

Ghost:

Given the absolute S T A T E of this man’s mental health, I think he secretly watches p0rn for the plot.

No, really. I mean he genuinely watches p0rn for the storyline; though not just any storyline.

It has to have feeling, romance. Love.

Though he’d never, ever, EVER admit it, he watches it to fill an emotional void in his life rather than a sexual one (ejaculation is just a bonus - he sees it as more of a duty to his body’s needs rather than his personal ones).

Definitely favours p0rn where it features a couple who have reunited after a long stretch of time and…well, have at it.

He found that there’s a startling lack of this in the men’s category, though, so he goes and finds it in the women’s because p0rn there is a lot softer, much more sensual, and doesn’t feel as creepy.

Ghost isn’t a fan of typical straight p0rnography; he thinks it’s too violent and unrealistic.

Instead, he watches ones where the couple aren’t just fucking or having sex - they’re making love.

And, really, beneath all the death and decay and bloodshed his life has become buried under, Ghost wants what those couples have.

Maybe if he knows you and likes you, he’ll jack off to the thought of you in those situations with him - absolutely even more so if you’re his partner.

Ghost would NEVER divulge the actual p0rnography he consumes - not even to Soap.

Whenever the guys back at Base would try and draw the truth out of him - Johnny especially - he’d tell them to “Pipe the fuck down” and “Get back to work.”

However, if he were a little loose-lipped via the aid of booze, he’ll cast the 141 a false line.

And when Johnny comes asking him what his preferences are again, Ghost won’t even cast him a second glance as the lie spills between his lips as he, Simon Riley, with all the conviction of a man accused of a false crime, says “Hardcore lesbian.”

And nobody will think to even question it.

König:

If he’s in a dom mood, something hardcore, though nothing outright sadistic; especially if he’s just returned from a mission.

Instead it’ll be, at most, some bondage, maybe some marking here and there - really nothing too wild.

He saves that for when he’s with you.

On the contrary, if he’s feeling a little raw from his time away but still needs to relieve himself, he’ll watch something similar to Ghost in that whatever he chooses to jank himself off to has to have a storyline. And love.

Though, his may be just a smidge more softcore than Ghost’s in that maybe the more dominantly perceived of the couple bottoms on occasion, or there just isn’t as much sex in favour of a richer storyline.

Most of the time, König actually never makes it to the stage of jacking off because he’s so invested in where the protagonists’ relationship is going and starts getting emotional.

This happens if you’re away and not within his immediate vicinity because he can only think of yours and his relationship.

98% of the time, he gets to the end of the video, realises he’s gone half limp, and just decides to go and watch a rom-com instead.

But don’t be fooled.

The second you arrive home, he’ll be on you like a blanket.

And he is not letting you go until both your needs are met.

Soap:

Something conventional yet with a distinct Johnny twist to it.

I can see him reading Playboy mags, for one, though this is more to get himself hard rather than to alleviate himself with.

He goes for something stronger when he wants to get himself off.

Definitely into the whole jealousy/possessiveness trope, so anything where one of the leads gets jealous for one reason or another and just destroys their partner afterwards is his type of media.

Johnny strikes me as a switch with top lean, so he’s much more likely to put himself in the position of the dominant lead instead of the lead receiving punishment.

Soap definitely gets off on some degree of dumbification - more so that, when the dom lead is almost through with their partner, said partner is just a heaving, whimpering, cum-soaked mess beneath them.

That, and body worship.

Soap wants to see a loving relationship wherein the leads truly love each other and find each other physically attractive (reflecting Johnny’s relationship with you), so to see one or the other in these on-screen relationships tell the other what they love about them gets him a little hot under the collar (though the collar may have been long discarded).

That’s the home stretch that gets Johnny off.

He also watches p0rn to improve, in a way.

Occasionally, he gets a little insecure that there may come a day where he can’t meet your needs, so he uses p0rn as a training ground to make sure he’s at the top of his game.

And many practice sessions with you too, of course.

Price:

University professor x Student.

Change my mind.

No clue what brought this on in him; I feel like this may have just been something he experimented with one bored evening and found that it worked, so he just kept consuming it. Or, it phased into his psyche after being so high in the chain of command for so long.

Either way, he usually can only get off to being in a position of dominance and power.

Though, he does have other preferences when it comes to how he asserts this dominance.

Sometimes he’ll watch historic p0rn (stay with me on this) where there’s a couple in the 40’s - one of whom is a soldier, the other the caretaker of their shared house - who are able to return to each other.

And then they…well, what couples who’ve been separated by war and worry usually do in these circumstances.

I feel like Price may have a preference for the couple being straight, but only for the aspect of one of them being a traditional housewife who the soldier wants to start a family with.

Pretty wholesome concept. Pretty unwholesome execution.

Price isn’t a fan of violent p0rnography, so it’s pretty ordinary and vanilla, but it satiates his breeding kink.

And my god, does this man have a breeding kink.

Not that anyone else on Base knows that.

They know literally nothing about his sexual preferences, and, given he’s their superior, they rarely push the issue when he shuts it down.

Alejandro:

Slow and sensual wins the race.

Man loves a good story – especially if it starts with an argument and one of the leads having to comfort the other by…making it up to them.

Alejandro’s an intense, romantic man, so it would stand to reason that his p0rnographic preferences would match his personality.

Definitely into body worship and praising, both giving and receiving.

The top lead has to be attentive to the sub lead’s needs, to the point that there are slivers of tears running down their cheeks because they feel so good.

Alejandro also has an unintentional preference for edging.

He won’t let himself finish until the sub lead has first; out of habit more than anything else.

If you walk in on him watching it, he’ll be absolutely shameless.

Will beckon you over with a dashing smile and say something to the effect of: “Mi amor, come here. My lap is lonely without you in it.”

Only uses p0rn as a last resort; so if you’re asleep, or away, or just don’t feel like having sex that night, Alejandro will excuse himself and do his business in the next room.

Nothing compares to you, though; these encounters with nameless couples on a screen cannot hold a candle’s light to the flaming glory of euphoria Alejandro feels whenever he is near you, never mind inside you.

And he reminds you of this daily.

Man’s a nymphomaniac, what can I say /j.

Gaz:

For him, it changes.

He’s the youngest in the 141 so he’s more likely than the rest to experiment (the least likely being Price because he’s found his genre lol).

So, really, it is very difficult to pin down his preferences.

However, I will say he takes a liking to p0rn that is very much unexpected.

I mean Hollywood-tier movie twists and turns that would have any outside observer assume that Gaz was just watching an action film the perfect cover.

He did take a fancy to skydiving p0rn once (just people doing it in the air while they’re skydiving - don’t ask how).

But when the crippling reality of how that would work logistically crossed Gaz’s 500 IQ mind, he lost his passion for it.

Let’s just say, whipping your ween out at that altitude with that much pressure against you while falling at a solid 130 mph is more likely to result in the appendage being taken by the wind than anything else.

Aside from that, Gaz has the widest range of tastes in the 141 since he experiments the most.

He has found he has the strongest preference for threesomes.

Only because he’s kind of fascinated by the concept and how much coordination it would take to execute the whole operation.

It genuinely actually started when he couldn’t get to sleep one night and had to go online to read up on the logistics – how these throuples worked and the statistics associated with them.

And now, here we are; crippling p0rn addiction.

I am actually joking; Gaz doesn’t even jack off the most out of the 141.

Graves:

Threesomes, orgies, gangbangs - you name it, he’ll enjoy it.

Superiority complex; he needs to feel in control over as many people as possible.

As most CEOs do.

As such, anything where the lead is in control is his go-to, though he won’t watch straight-up torture p0rn.

However, the lead is typically disproportionately stronger than the co-lead, so you can take that to mean that Graves watches generic p0rn targeted towards the male mass market; so usually something rough with a storyline so flimsy and thin that the terrible acting is made ever more transparent. Apparent.

Graves looks to p0rn only to fulfil himself; if he wants to feel loved or worshipped he’ll just go to you.

When you’re unavailable, however, he’ll just jerk off to the infinite stream of p0rn he has.

Or, considering how rich he is, he’ll get you to make a sex tape with him and just watch that.

Man’s got the money to make it happen; he ain’t janking it to a 144p video of low-quality blocks doing it.

Into body worship (as previously mentioned).

Also really into foreplay.

His favourite’s a kidnapping scenario. No clue why, I didn’t wanna ask. But I get the distinct impression it has to do, yet again, with his superiority complex.

(Daddy Kink Enjoyer; don’t tell him I told you that).

Valeria:

H A R D C O R E P O R N

Seriously, the amount of sheer sadism and violence it takes to get her off is concerning.

It comes with the territory; you run a cartel, you lose a bit of humanity; it’s the way of the world.

If you’re not around, Valeria will take to watching some of the most toe-curling, gut-wrenching p0rn you’ve never seen.

I’m talking hard BDSM, knife play, blood play - you name it; if it’s violent, Valeria will most likely have gotten off to it.

Has gotten off to security footage of her torture sessions with her victims before now.

However, she isn’t like that with you (unless you want her to be).

If you prefer her to be more gentle, she’ll simply just go and watch p0rn to satiate her more adventurous needs, saving her soft, loving, tender side for you and you alone.

But, if you want to experiment, Valeria will put all that she has acquired through torturing and p0rn consumption and take you on a one-way trip to pound town.

Big fan of lesbian p0rn, regardless of whether she’s actively in a relationship with a woman or not.

For this specific genre, she loves seeing women in strap-ons.

Just does something to her (call it feminism).

Also a big fan of heavy bondage, marking and intimidation.

She simply enjoys dominion over everyone, regardless of gender, identity – it doesn’t matter to her.

And you are no different.

However, she’d never actually hurt you - not in ways you didn’t want her to.

Because, at the end of the day, she loves you more than life itself and would buy the stars to see them sparkle in your smiling eyes.

Rodolfo:

Accidentally clicked on a pop-up for a free iPad once and it was all over from there.

I'm kidding (mostly).

Rudy doesn't jack off very often, what with his work and physical training taking up so much of his time.

As such, his tastes aren't fully developed as of yet, so he's still at the stage where seeing two people sat on the same sofa is too much for him.

Jkjk. But not too far off the mark.

Rudy will watch whatever's popular at the time, but only because he doesn't know what else he likes, and so doesn't actively go searching for it.

He can't stand bad acting.

He understands that it comes with the territory of consuming p0rn, but he doesn't see it as an excuse to be lax when it comes to the believability of the story and the acting.

When he eventually gets sick and tired of it, he'll just go and read an erotic novel.

Has become somewhat of a connoisseur of the erotic book genre; he has favourite authors, authors he wouldn't touch with a barge pole, preferred genres, etc.

His favourite genre at the moment is friends to enemies to lovers reconciliation novels.

Just loves how, no matter how bad things may seem during the book, everything comes together at the end :-).

Everyone gets a happy ending, everything is resolved.

Secretly, he actually enjoys these novels for the story rather than the sexual content.

Please protect him, he's so wholesome <3.

Reblog for more content like this! It helps creators like myself tremendously :-)

Masterlist Masterlist [Continued] Masterpost Modern Warfare AI Masterlist

AO3 Wattpad

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voltronisanobsession · 1 year ago

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hi! i was wondering if i could request a percy jackson! platonic headcanon fic where like luke, y/n is also being manipulated and possessed by one of the evil gods and the group finds out? (also i’m sorry to go all teen wolf but she starts to act kinda like void stiles) ty!

Reader being Controlled by a God

NEVER apologize for going all teen wolf, I love this idea😍😍😍😍😍 when you say headcanons fic, imma think you meant headcanons but with a story plot🔥

I think this is a little more generalized than what I usually write

I’m telling you, when I finish heroes of Olympus, WE WILL HAVE A BIGGER AND BETTER GROUP OF CHARACTERS💀🙏🙏🙏

The change is a slow process

Not many caught onto your change appearances, those who did marking it down as an off day you had

Plagued with nightmares and visions, paranoia grows as you distance yourself from the group slowly

This god, you didn’t know their name or their face

The fear they instilled in you was enough for your confidence to break down though

It was like having a devil on your shoulder, it’s soft whisperings influencing your everyday life

You tried blocking it all out, but it was getting too much! You could never escape the whispers, even in sleep, which was way worse than being awake

Yet you didn’t dare tell a soul, what would people say! Would Chiron kick you out of the camp? Gods, you can’t be kicked out another home again, you just can’t!

You lose sleep as this god takes its hold on you, grip tightening more as the weeks pass

It isn’t long until you began listening to the voice, listening to it as it planted seeds of deceit and darkness

I think the one who would pick up on your weird changes is Annabeth lowkey

She notices EVERYTHING

When you don’t show up to breakfast in the mornings, she takes note of it. During training, she notices how you have this far off, dull look in your eyes. Like you’re there physically, but mentally somewhere else.

She definitely sees how you look at everyone now, a distrusting expression as you distance yourself from those around you

So when the girl tries approaching you about it, making it known that she’s worried for her friend, Annabeth is taken aback by your defensive aggression

“Don’t worry about it, its none of your buisness” you would say, eyes narrowed and arms crossed, shutting down any other attempts she tries to make

And while the others try to reassure her you could be upset about something else, one look at you and she already knows that there’s something more

You begin doing small tasks for your new friend

They’re small at first, pack a bag with a few necessities, steal some drachmas, your cabin mate won’t notice a few missing

You don’t even notice as they get a bit extreme, wordlessly following its orders to sneak into Chiron’s office and take some files, and to go into the woods after they call lights out in the dead of night

You’re friends grow even more suspicious and worried as you seem to creep around the camp grounds

They might even hear you whispering to yourself one day. What’s next, you would ask. Whose here? Hiding behind a tree, your friends would finally see that there’s something seriously wrong with you

Percy prays to any god or goddess listening that you just haven’t moved on from your invisible friend phase, but as always, nothing ever goes his way

This voice that first haunted even your sweetest of dreams was a familiar one that you grew to trust

They’re all waiting to watch you stumble, my dear. They’ll use you until there’s nothing left of you.

Join us, you’ll have me to guide you through the new life I’m offering you.

Your final task sets everything in motion, setting off every alarm in every demigods head as you walk past them.

With one mission in your head, you head towards the training grounds where Percy and a few others swung their swords at dummies

Taking the nearest sword, you walked up to Percy from behind, pushing everyone who got in your way

Speeding up to close the gap between you two, Percy’s instincts takes over as he quickly glances behind him and narrowly dodges your swing at him

He wouldn’t have any time to think as you continuously swing the sword you held at him, not once stopping even as he tried talking to you

“What’s going on with you?! Talk to me y/n!

“Do you seriously ugh- think talking is gonna get you out of this?”

Because of your sloppy form due to the wrong sized sword you took, you were taken down by the green eyed boy, causing you to scamper away from him

Heaving and looking at him with irritation, he could make out a dark shadowy figure lingering behind you, almost encasing you with its darkness

That’s it

It isn’t until Annabeth comes running in with Chiron that you make your escape into the woods, where they search hours for you, only to come empty handed

But you didn’t leave without leaving behind a small gifts

At sundown, three hellhounds were released into the camp grounds by portals no one knew existed

Just like Luke, you had betrayed them all, yet they felt that they couldn’t blame anyone but themselves!

The signs were there since the beginning!

It seemed that this god, a new enemy, had taken over your head, and your friends weren’t going to stop until they finally had the real you back🔥🔥

Cue epic music playing in the background

#pjo x reader #percy jackson x reader #percy jackson x you #platonic pjo #pjo headcanons #percy jackson and the olympians x reader #percy jackson headcanons #headcanons #x reader #pjo #Percy jackson #Annabeth chase #annabeth chase pjo #Annabeth pjo

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heliads · 1 year ago

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ok so… i’m totally obsessing over Newt from TMR rn but i’m not sure if u still write for him🤧 but if u do i was thinking maybe something like during bonfire night the reader has had too many special drinks from Gally, accidentally confesses to Newt and lists everything she loves about him and then Newt gets all flustered and stuff (he’s so cute omg) but the reader is too drunk to go back to their own hammock so then Newt carries reader to their hammock but ends up sharing a hammock and then the reader doesn’t remember anything the next morning and then i’ll let u decide the rest😭

gally's special brew as a plot device >> it will always be famous to me

masterlist

In roughly thirty seconds, you’re going to reach a milestone you never thought possible. You’ve been waiting for this for a while now, counting down the days and hours and minutes like you were going to find yourself anywhere other than right here when your self-imposed timer went off. All you’ve got to remember the date is a memory, but given the fact that you only recall so many of those, it was easier to place than one would expect.

An alarm goes off across the Glade, ear-piercing klaxons rattling off of the high stone walls surrounding you. The rest of the boys around you start to amble towards the source of the noise, the Box newly arrived from who knows where, but you stay put for the time being, just breathing in the moment.

One blond boy next to you, your closest friend and favorite person here, nudges you in the leg with his foot. You’re both sitting in the unruly grass, ignoring the press of the green strands against your arms and calves. You have a habit of always wanting to keep him within reach.

“Why aren’t you racing towards the Box?” He asks.

You tilt your head to the side, staring up at the sky. Robin’s egg blue dappled with clouds, it’s the only pocket of space outside the Walls that you’ll likely ever know. “Today marks one year since I showed up here for the first time.”

Newt whistles through his teeth. “Shoot, already? Feels like time has flown. I swore you came up just last month.”

“No, I’ve been keeping count. Twelve months and I’m still here.”

Newt winces. He made a promise to you at the very start that he would get you out in six months, then, when that deadline came and went, he lengthened it to a year. The oath was only sworn because you were nervous about this place when you were still a Greenie and unused to the idea of living and dying here in endless repetition. You’re no happier about that fact now, but you are more used to it, at least.

“Well,” he starts off, “maybe you’re still here, yeah, but Minho and the other Runners are getting closer to finding a way out, I swear. Minho says they’re this close to having mapped the whole thing, then we’ll have an escape route for certain. Just give it another year. You won’t even notice the time passing, I promise.”

It’s kind of Newt to try to distract you again, even though you both know by this point that it’s useless. Minho is getting closer to traveling every pathway of the Maze, yes, but what Newt isn’t mentioning is how little the Keeper of the Runners actually is to finding something useful. Whenever you ask Minho what he’s learned about how to get out of here, he only ever comes up with a blank slate.

Still, harping on that doesn’t exactly make for a good time, so you’ll let yourself play along with Newt’s idea of your inevitable escape from this place for now. He’s losing hope even faster than you, even if he doesn’t tell anyone. It would be good to keep up the pretense.

You eye his leg, the one with the limp, and nod. “Yeah, next year for sure.”

Newt sits in silence for a moment or two longer, then stands up carefully, offering a hand to you. “Come on, then. We’ve got a Greenie to stare at and stuff to unpack from the Box, no time for musing. Besides, we’ve all got to get ready for the bonfire later tonight.”

You accept his offer of help, and when you’re on your feet once more, your smile is back. “I forgot about the bonfire! Oh, that’ll make everything better. Always does.”

Newt grins. “You’re just saying that because it’s the one time a month Alby will let all of us get proper wasted and skip work for the afternoon.”

“Of course I am,” you laugh, “I want to have fun! Is that such a terrible thing?”

Newt slings an arm around your shoulders, pulling you closer to his side as the two of you walk lopsidedly over to the Box opening. The other Gladers have already crowded around the opening, but there’s enough space for the two of you to peer in at the befuddled newcomer inside if you squeeze past a few Track-Hoes.

“No,” he murmurs later, once you’ve almost forgotten what you were talking about, “I don’t think it is.”

Damn right. You’ve looked forward to each Bonfire Night of your full year here with just as much excitement as everyone else. The soaring flames, the delighted shrieks and shouts of your friends, plus Gally’s special brew, everything about the celebration is a joy to behold. You can watch Gally kick the asses of people who should have known better to challenge him, or observe the Greenie as he tries to figure out his name.

Or, better yet, you can sit in a circle of your friends and tell jokes that get progressively worse as the lot of you get progressively more tipsy and tired. The night wears on, the stars burn themselves out above you just trying to catch a glimpse of your magnificently roaring fire, and all is well, as much as it can be around here.

At some point, you look up and you’re sitting alone with Newt towards the outskirts of the gathering. You don’t remember quite when that happened, but you’ve refilled your glass enough times that the memory loss sort of makes sense. Does anything here, though? No, not at all. Not ever.

Newt’s grinning over at you, saying something that you have to focus extra hard to hear. “Are you lucid again?”

“Not entirely,” you beam up at him, “Have I had a lot to drink tonight?”

Newt grimaces. “Probably more than you should have. You’ll be regretting it tomorrow, I can promise you that. Sorry for not cutting you off earlier.”

You shake your head a little too wildly and have to pause for a moment to blink the stars out of your eyes before continuing. “No, that’s not your fault. You don’t have to watch out for me all the time.”

Something almost like hurt plays upon Newt’s features, mixing with the warm glow of the firelight, and it makes you rush to say something so he stops looking so unhappy. “Only if you don’t want to watch out for me, that is. I like having you around. Makes me feel better.”

“Really?” Newt asks, amused.

“Really,” you confirm happily. “You’re my favorite person here by far. Minho teases me about that a lot, actually. He says I should soldier up and just tell you that, but he can’t bully me anymore, because I’m talking about it right now, aren’t I? He’s right, though, I do like you. Oh– I was thinking, Newt, and– and I think I’m okay, staying in the Glade forever, if I’ve got you here with me. You’re the best thing about this place.”

You hadn’t meant to ramble on like that, but the words came easily enough from your throat, and Newt seemed like he really wanted to hear what you were saying, so you went ahead and let him.

Newt sits for a few minutes in stunned silence before clearing his throat a little too loudly. “Um. Well, I think you should get to bed. Like, now. I think you’re drunk.”

“No,” you protest, “well, I am drunk, yeah, but I’m not just saying that because I’m drunk. I mean it, Newt. I really do.”

Newt’s expression softens. “I know you did, sweetheart. Let’s go to bed anyway, though. I think some rest would be good for you.”

“Alright,” you decide.

Newt stands up. You try to start walking back with him, but your feet refuse to cooperate on the uneven ground and you end up tripping more than you should. Eventually, Newt laughs quietly and picks you up, easily carrying you back to your hammock. He tries to set you down but you’re seized by the overwhelming panic that he’ll leave you here alone and you complain vehemently.

He’s still in a good temper, though (is it not wonderful to be needed?) and instead shifts so he’s lying down in his hammock instead, you on his stomach. You whisper goodnight to him and he says goodnight back, then a beat and a half later, did you really mean what you said? About me, that is? About how you–

You can’t really pick up what he’s saying, though. He was right about you needing rest, because the gentle swaying of the hammock and the soft beat of his heart under your head is just enough to send you off to sleep. Darkness pulls you under in an instant, and you’re rocked away to the tune of the crickets chirping somewhere in the distance and Newt still mumbling questions against the top of your head.

You can sense your hangover looming like dark clouds on the horizon, signaling a true storm of a day about to wreck you for good, but for now it’s just in the distance, not quite yours, not yet. The terrible feeling is warded off by an odd sense of calm and quiet. It’s warm now, warm and comfortable in your hammock, which is strange. Usually, you wake up cold on mornings in the Glade, but not today. It makes you want to snuggle down further, push off consciousness just a little longer.

Then your hand connects with something that isn’t one of your few allotted threadbare blankets or the knots of your hammock, something soft, like skin. A hand, one that isn’t yours. Your eyes fly open and– well, you don’t remember this, but you’re not exactly going to complain.

Newt is lying next to you, still asleep. You are curled up beside him, must have fallen asleep with your head on his chest. One of his hands is just touching yours, the other is cupping the back of your head to pull you closer to him.

Immediately your brain splits into two warring factions. One half wants to run away quickly, figure out what happened and why you’re here. This isn’t what you’re supposed to be doing, you know. Shuck, Alby would have a fit if he saw the two of you like this. Probably enough to throw you in the Slammer for a couple of hours.

The other part of yourself wants to stay here forever, to close your eyes and make Newt wake up first and handle it. You haven’t felt peace like this in a while. It’s just the two of you, soft and sweet and mostly folded over in sleep. Why should you disturb this? Disturb him? He’ll just be unhappy if you wake him and force him to realize that you’re here. Probably. Unless he’s the one who let you sleep in his hammock, which is more likely and far more terrifying.

Your issue is solved when Newt shifts slightly, rocking the hammock, and wakes up at last. You quickly shut your eyes and feign sleep, but judging by the movement of his chest as he laughs, you were caught in the act.

“I know you’re awake, Y/N.” He says.

You reluctantly open your eyes. “Maybe. By any chance, do you know why I’m here and not in my own hammock?”

You might just be kidding yourself, but you swear something almost like disappointment crosses Newt’s face. “You were pretty drunk last night,” he says at last, “I wanted to make sure you were alright.”

It’s a decent explanation, but that doesn’t explain why he’s looking at you like he really, really wants you to remember something about the events of the most recent Bonfire Night. “What did I do last night?” You ask slowly.

Newt shakes his head. “You didn’t do anything, trust me.”

“Then what did I say? You’re looking at me like you’re going crazy.”

Newt furrows his brows in a moment of indignation. “What? I’m not– I’m not looking at you like that. Anyway, you might have said a thing or two. Maybe.”

You stare at him in disbelief. “Newt, if you keep withholding information from me, I’m going to rock the hammock so much you fall on the ground. What happened?”

He has the audacity to laugh at your threat, as if you weren’t completely serious about it. “Alright, alright. You might have told me that you liked me.”

Your sense of terror, which had faded briefly after Newt woke up, is back in full force. “I did what?”

“You told me you liked me,” Newt repeats, “and I thought– well, you were drunk, so I thought you didn’t mean it, but–”

“I did mean it,” you whisper.

Newt’s eyes are wide when you dare to risk a glance back up at him. “Oh.”

That’s a bad oh. Has to be. You move to get up and try to run away before he can look at you like that anymore, but Newt tightens his grip around your waist, forcing you to lie back down. “Wait, wait. Don’t go. I like you too.”

Now it’s your turn to be surprised. “You do?”

“Yeah,” he says, smiling, “Have for a while. Minho teases me about that too, by the way. No wonder he seems so frustrated about it, he has to listen to both of us moping around even though we both like each other.”

You laugh. “That would be annoying, yes. He has to be happy now, though, we finally told each other about it.”

“That we did,” Newt says, and you can feel the upturned crescent of his lips as he presses a kiss to your forehead.

Maybe you spent a whole year in the Glade without ever seeing rescue. Maybe another year will pass without anything, or maybe five, or ten. Maybe you’ll never leave at all. Still, you’ve got your reasons to be happy after all. They start with him.

maze runner tag list: @rogueanschel, @ellobruv, @retvenkos, @neewtmas, @mayfieldss, @hiya-itsamber, @gods-fools-heroes, @hope92100, @w1shes43, @23victoria, @ilovexavierthrope, @fadedver

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erxxi3 · 2 years ago

Note

Reader trying to get Leon to sleep with her but he’s not getting the hint. Instead of Ashley being the one getting saved it’s reader. Till Luis starts to tell Leon if he isn’t gonna take a hint he’ll have sex with her.

But what if i switch it up ay the end where leon gets a little possessive over the reader?? 🤭

Sub x Dom dynamic w Re4r Leon and the fem! Reader

Summary: He’s saving you (instead of Ashley & your his mission) you are the president’s daughter, and giving him hints you wanna be with him but he doesn’t get it, so Luis tells him that you wanna fuck him although you just want to get together w him basically bf and gf!

SMUT W PLOT AHEAD!! MINORS DNI!!

— Needy Princess

************************************************

Since the mission of saving you, the president’s daughter, even started Leon has been extra protective over you and determined to keep you safe. Besides the point you are very restless and sore from running all this way, fighting, and even meeting new people like luis. It is also obvious how tired you are since Leon has to carry you to the nearest save room, you have flirted with him countless times and even gave him hints having still never taken a hint. You invited him to lay next to you as you pat the bed beside you.

He can only shake his head while he stares at you with shining eyes ‘Can’t slack off on a mission, sorry y/n’. causing you to frown and nod at his own wishes right now, luis comes in walking up to you as your sleeping, leon walks closer to luis and pushes him against the wall pinning him there in frustration “What do you think your doing?!” He asks luis who just shrugs at him, a look Leon gives can easily make someone die.

Luis said crossing his arms against his chest “Maybe if you took the subtle hints Y/N gave you we wouldn’t be in such a situation. Jeez she clearly wants you, so if you can’t take the hint, I’ll just have sex with her!” The brunette says cockily, causing Leon’s cheeks to flush with anger but at the same time he could feel himself getting turned on by luis bold statement about Y/N, making him chuckle darkly “No way, no way are you going to sleep with her, I want her. So shut your mouth and go away.”

With those words Leon pushed luis out of his way making the brunette glare at Leon but not before mouthing “I’m still waiting for my turn, you don’t have a claim yet and she’s mine.” and then walking down the hallways to continue the mission. It makes Leon feel weird, it made him uncomfortable that luis seems to want you and not him. Leon shakes his head and goes back to check if you woke up, which you did but then again you weren’t really awake since you were half asleep.

Leon gently touches your forehead to wake you up a bit more when you start to stir, and you blink up at Leon before you smile softly at him and give him a little peck on his cheek “Good morning Leon” you mumble softly.

“Morning, how do you feel?” He asks.

“Better actually, I haven’t felt as tired for days” You answered.

“That’s good. How long ago did you take to wake up though?” Leon asks and your face turns red a bit, he must notice your expression, because Leon laughs lightly at how cute you looked embarrassed.

“Y/N, what happened? You know that I love you right?” He says and you nod hesitantly and very slowly.

Did you hear that correctly or are you just imagining things?

Leon leans down slightly and puts his lips against yours and kisses you sweetly “And I’m going to protect you always.” he finishes and you smile shyly at him “Leon… You’re going to get sick of carrying me around!” You say and you lean up to kiss him again but it didn’t last very long “Don’t worry, that doesn’t mean I won’t carry you around” Leon says with a smirk before planting kisses on your neck.

You blush profusely but then laugh softly when Leon starts to leave butterfly kisses around your throat making you giggle “mmh!” you let out an unexpected whper. You can’t really hear yourself but just Leon laughing “Sorry princess, I didn’t know I was that good at kissing.” Leon says with a smug grin and licks at your earlobe and you giggle again “Mhm! Just like what I imagined” you whisper to Leon who smiles at you warmly and kisses you once more before laying you on your bed and climbing on top of you.

He leans down and whispers to you “Do you wanna stay here or go upstairs?”. His voice is husky and low and sends goosebumps all over your skin. Your breath hitches as you gulp before replying “Uhh….” You mumble, you’re blushing hard and your voice comes out in a stutter so that makes Leon chuckle quietly as he leans down to your lips. He captures them with his own one, moving slowly LG and giving you time to react but you don’t. All you can do is moan into his mouth when his tongue slips into your mouth. Leon chuckles and wraps his arms around your waist pulling you close.

He presses a lingering soft kiss to your temple as he pulls away from you, looking at you intently “Is that better?” he asks in a huskier voice.

“Much” you whisper to him lovingly.

“Good. Now let'me show you what I'm capable of, princess” Leon whispers back and he lifts you up, pressing you against him as he climbs off the bed. His hands are under your thighs making it easy for him to pick you up bridal style, he carries you to the door and heads to your bedroom where he lays you onto the bed.

He stands up as he looks at you for a moment before leaning over you taking a few moments to admire the way your body is exposed to him and your red face is hidden behind your hands, “Please be gentle...” you say shyly. And Leon nods before bending down to kiss your forehead tenderly, making you shiver a bit “Will be princess~.” He whispers before leaning down again pressing his lips to yours and this time, his kisses are passionate and possessive.

This time, you can’t help but gasp and squirm under his touch as he pulls apart from you, his hands roaming over your curves. Leon smirks at your reactions and kisses his way to your neck “Are you ready, princess?” he asks huskily against your earlobe. A shiver runs down your spine and you nod eagerly.

He places another kiss on your mouth as his hand slides down to caress you through your dress, “Then let’s see if i can make you come.” he murmurs as he moves to pull away. However, he gets pulled down instead by you who immediately latches on his mouth again in order to try and keep him down “Don’t go yet~” You whine. Leon groans as he pulls you close to him, holding you against his torso as you straddle him. “But princess~” he moans against your neck as he kisses you deeply. You can feel his erection rubbing against your ass through your dress, you feel like you might lose control any second.

“Please Leon, stop teasing” you whine, Leon just chuckles softly and kisses the side of your neck again “Only when you tell me to~” he replies between kisses and bites, causing you to whimper “I will...but not until you give me some attention~” You admit. Leon raises an eyebrow and hums softly, his gaze becoming heated “Alright, alright, I’ll listen.” Leon replies while he kisses along your jawline, trailing down to the curve of your neck leaving wet marks as he goes down to your breasts “Mmf!” You gasp out as you feel his wet kisses down your chest.

As he keeps licking and biting down at your nipples, he grabs your left arm and hooks his fingers on the wristband to lift it. Your other hand goes to grab at him as he starts sucking on your breast as well, causing your hips to start bucking against him. When you reach for him and tug at his hair with your left hand, you let out an involuntary noise when he bites down on your nipple, making you arch your back slightly.

Leon takes the opportunity to press his body against yours, feeling his bulge brush against your center. “Oh God please don’t make me cum like this!” You plead with him, you wanted him but you needed to hold on for just a little longer so that you won’t come too soon. And he just laughs lowly “If only I could. Then I would” he says and you can feel his hardness pressing against your core. You bite your lip and try to hold back a moan as you feel him rub against you, making you feel even more aroused. Leon notices your struggle and stops teasing you, he pulls away from you and looks at you with lust filled eyes “I’ll give you whatever you want, baby~” Leon says as he cups your chin softly and brings your lips together in a hungry hungry kiss, his mouth slanting across yours.

It’s hot and rough and everything you have ever dreamed about. And Leon never fails to surprise you. “…Want you..want you inside me.” You manage to say, He breaks the kiss suddenly after you beg him to enter, breathing heavily “So impatient princess~” he says amusedly before continuing to pound against you. After what felt like hours of fucking, Leon lets out a breathless pant before pulling away from you “Damn you’re tight, (y/n)..” he pants as he continues to pump himself against you.

“Warmth..warmth inside me..” you breathe and moan loudly when he finally slams himself into your core. Your hands were gripping the sheets tightly enough that it was white and it would definitely tear anytime soon. But that didn’t matter anymore, your mind was focused on Leon’s thrusts and moans which are coming out as shaky breaths, they sounded sexy and desperate.

The pressure builds up within you and you feel your orgasm coming closer, your legs tighten instinctively as you start rocking against Leon’s member. “Ah~!~ I’m gonna cum, Leon! Don’t stop! Ah~~ Mnn~!~” you shout in pleasure and you feel a sudden warmth spreading through your body as you came and came hard and fast. Leon grunts as his seed fills your insides.

He holds you close, resting his chin on top of your head, his hand playing with your hair gently, kissing your skin lightly. He was panting too, but his breathing calmed down quickly. You both lay there in silence for awhile, listening to each other's heavy breathing and relaxing completely. You move in the crook of Leon' s arm so you're laying next to him instead of hovering above him. “Thank you…” you murmur sleepily. “Anytime, sweetheart..” Leon mumbles as he pulls you closer and nuzzles your hair lovingly. You snuggle into his embrace as the two of you fall asleep in each other's arms with a blanket over both of you. Luis leaning against the doorframe smirking and saying ‘I knew it.’ with a smirk

The next morning you wake up early with a yawn as you glance around the room. Your eyes widen and your heart skips a beat when you realize you weren't alone, Leon was still sleeping beside you, still hugging you close and smiling sleepily. Your blush creeps up to your cheeks as you watch him sleep, enjoying the sight of him. You smile softly and lean forward to kiss his cheek, whispering “Good morning!”. Leon stirs a bit and opens his eyes, blinking a couple of times before he smiles at you and kisses your forehead.

“Morning, princess” he whispers back. You smile and snuggle closer to him “How long have we been asleep?” you ask curiously. Leon doesn’t reply straightaway as he runs his fingertips lightly down the side of your stomach, tracing patterns on your bare skin “Well…it must’ve been late” Leon answers casually.

“And the sun hasn’t risen yet...” He adds, giving you a peck on the forehead before sitting up and stretching, “We should get dressed princess, it’s too dangerous for us to be out here naked” Leon says sternly, giving you a look as he reaches over and tugs on the hem of your skirt. He puts back on his gear and bulletproof vest before he grabs his backpack and turns back towards you “Do you need some help princess?” He offers. He picks you up bridal style and cradles you close to his chest as he helps you put your clothing back on and buttoning it all up neatly.

“Now let's continue the mission of getting you home.”

……………………………………. …………………………………

#resident evil #leon kennedy x reader #leon kennedy x fem! reader #leon kennedy #resident evil 🚔#re4 leon #leon s kennedy #leon kennedy x y/n #leon kennedy x fem reader #leon kennedy x you #leon kennedy smut #resident evil smut #resident evil x reader smut #resident evil leon #leon re4 #leon x reader #leon scott kennedy x reader

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highlordofkrypton · 23 days ago

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SUMMARY: Before he was a terrifying eldritch god, Nyx was a child. He died and was brought back, and was ultimately lost in the sorrows of the circumstances of his birth. Lucien Vanserra is the father he always needed, and Nesta is the mother he'd never known. Together, they navigate the difficulties of having a strange child, and heal their own wounds.

AUTHOR'S NOTE: A short prequel to cosmogeny, I was inspired by @lucienweekofficial's prompt for Day 5: Home to flesh out the relationship between Nyx, Lucien and Nesta as a found family.

Thank you so much, @thrumbolt for being my wonderful beta for this fic! And for @yaralulu, @matrixsss and @watcherintheweyr for your continued support in holding my hand whenever I doubt myself!

READ UNDER THE CUT OR ON AO3.

Homes are hard to find.

Twice displaced, Lucien has abandoned all thought of belonging. Spring has come and gone, into winter’s long Night, but even there, he had been a passing guest. The clothes and the titles passed onto him were ill-fitting. The bond slipped into his mind, a curse. Pain follows him where he goes, parts of him sacrificed in the name of others.

For a friend, he gives up an eye.

For a would-be lover, he carves out his heart.

But for a boy who cannot see the world, and who longs for love, Lucien is willing to try again.

“How’s your arm?” He squeezes the little hand in his. “Not irritated from the journey?”

A bandage wraps around the child’s chest, securing the still healing wound of his lost arm. It’s visible under the ornate tailored jacket, black with deep blue threading to match his eyes. Lucien struggles to move past how much he looks like his father—how his unsmiling expression, though boyish, reminds him of Rhysand’s cunning. He knows that Nyx isn’t plotting anything, but he wishes—

Oh, he wishes he knew how to make him smile at least once.

Nyx shakes his head, quiet as ever. He speaks with all but his voice, and Lucien is one of the only few who understand him. It must have been lonely, navigating a world so full of others, but forced to remain on the outskirts by virtue of being different. Always a little too something. For Nyx, he is too little and too strange. Too difficult, if his father is to be believed. For Lucien, he had been too clingy and too soft, so his father had tried to beat it out of him.

Tried.

The young Illyrian flaps his wings for Lucien’s attention, and pulls on their joined hands gently. He motions to his clothes, asking to change before they leave the forest. Lucien had taken care to winnow them as close as possible, save for crossing the wall. Their clothes are pristine, but he kneels by him and dusts his shoulders off anyway.

“I think you look quite fine. Dashing, even. If anyone should freshen up, it’s me,” he says with a smile.

Exhaustion weighs on him; dark circles line his eyes, and he feels like he has aged five more centuries. His own wounds are invisible, hidden beneath layers of flesh and bone. The Day Court’s spellcleavers had told him to rest, but when has Lucien ever listened to reasonable advice? He’s more than happy to give it, but he’s spent too much time with irrationality that it’s passed onto him. He can rest once he’s made a home for this boy. One last time. He has to try one last time.

“Come, I’ll carry you so your boots don’t get muddy.”

Lucien scoops Nyx into his arms. Ever since the boy was born, he’d made a point to listen to him—his likes and his dislikes, they’re important. The others had made sure to keep Lucien at bay—they’d made sure to remind him that he was not one of them, no matter how much he tried to earn his place, if only to be around his former mate. Nyx had been his only company, a child that did not speak or look anyone in the eyes, but he listened in his own little way.

He makes sure to hold Nyx on his left hip, so that he can wrap his remaining arm around Lucien’s neck. For his age, he appears much younger. Affliction upon affliction, the goddess has not been kind to him.

You’re safe, he wants to promise, but no tension between himself and Nyx’s parents would allow him to speak ill of them. They’re… trying in their own way. Learning. Charm upon charm had been weaved into Rhysand’s ear to convince him to give Lucien time. He’ll work with Nyx and help him open up. One day, the boy will return and finish his training, but before then, he needs to want to live. Feyre had nothing to say, her stare as distant as her son’s. Lucien promised to write frequent letters.

They walk through the forests of the human lands towards the nearest village. Their destination is an easy one to find. Nyx spots it long before Lucien asks, staring curiously at the largest manor in the area. He pulls Nyx’s hood up, hiding the traitorous point of his ears, and keeps his own auburn hair untucked. A glamour shields his too-small wings from curious human eyes.

“Nervous?”

Nyx nods once, serious as ever.

The gates are open when they arrive, and the walk up to the main door is eternal. Lucien doesn’t know how she’ll react. It’s been a decade since they’ve seen each other, and their story is not a good one.

(He wonders if there’s any happiness left in this world. If he can’t find it, he’ll have to make it.)

“Do you want to knock?”

Nyx nods again, and Lucien sets him on the ground carefully. Nyx winds up his arm, knocking as hard as his little body can manage. He looks rattled by the attempt, as if the vibrations had bounced back right into him. He offers a small hiss, the feeling irritating the raw nerve of his injury. Lucien steadies him with a single hand.

Lucien breathes in, and then out, listening for the measured click of heels against marbled floors. The door swings open, and he stops breathing.

In ten years, Nesta has become more… refined. While the rest of them withered, she looks healthier. She looks good. Not that he expected anything less of her, but the way they parted was painful. Her face has narrowed, turning what was once beauty into something more striking—something more regal. The way she carries herself only adds to her magnetic presence. Even after all this time, she still wears the same reserved hairstyle. The familiarity makes him smile.

“Nesta,” he nods, and then bows. “Or perhaps, I should call you Lady Archeron.”

Nyx copies the gesture, bending at the waist. “Hello, Auntie.” His voice is barely a whisper, a polite (and shy) croak. They’d talked about how to address her during their long journey together. ‘ Nesta’ felt too familiar, but ‘ Lady Archeron ’ was too cold. Too distant. In the end, ‘ Auntie ’ felt just right. That’s what she is to him, after all.

Nesta regards Lucien like a hawk, assessing him after all this time. Her gaze is so sharp, the emissary suddenly feels self-conscious. He’s still wearing Night clothing, and they feel so, so wrong. “Nesta is fine,” is all she says, before flicking her attention to the little gentlefae before her.

She kneels.

“Hello, Nyx. It’s a pleasure to meet you again.” Nesta offers her hand to shake, but Nyx takes it and kisses the back of it, like he was taught to. “My,” Nesta laughs softly. “You’ve become a very charming youngling. Do you want to come inside?”

Nyx looks up at Lucien for permission, and Lucien nods. Of course, that’s what they’re here for. Nyx is reluctant to go anywhere new without Lucien, understandably so. The last time Nyx was left somewhere, it was a terrifying and violent place. He shouldn’t have been alone, but Cassian—

Ah, better not to think of these things here.

“Do you want to explore your new home? I’ll race you!” Nesta grins; Lucien has never seen her smile like that before. She takes Nyx’s hand, and Nyx joins her in her excitement. He’d never known she was good with children, or perhaps she’s making an effort for her nephew. Either way, she naturally entertains and encourages the boy. She matches his smaller strides, and gives him time to look around.

Lucien hangs back, letting them have their moment. The quicker Nyx acclimates to his aunt, the sooner he can leave them be. What happened all those years ago wasn’t her fault; she’d saved him, however she can, and Lucien finds that he cannot resent her for it. He loves Nyx for all that boy is, oddities and all.

He tries to leave to wait in the parlor, but Nyx always looks for him.

Nyx’s room is half the size of his room in Velaris, but it’s full of colour. The toys here are different, and the books have many pictures. Nyx is fascinated by the concept of fairy tales; his aunt Elain had mentioned them during her visits, but the selection is much bigger here. He goes straight for the books, sitting on his new bed to flip through the pages and run his fingers over the drawings.

“Thank you for bringing him,” Nesta joins Lucien at the threshold, leaning against the wall. They both look at him. “You should stay.”

“He just needs to know he’s safe. I’ll help you understand him, then I’ll be on my way.”

Nesta folds her arms, giving him a look. “You think I need help understanding him? You make it sound like he’s that different from other children.” From what she sees now, he’s not. He’s just like the other children she sees in the square, just… shy.

“Then, I’ll stay until he starts looking for you instead of me.” Though his smile is polite, a part of Lucien hopes that he’d be asked to stay. For as long as possible.

“I did this,” Nesta says suddenly. “If I hadn’t—”

“Don’t do that. It’s no one’s fault.”

“But his—”

“But he’s in a better place now.”

It’s not lost on him that Nyx has had to listen to his parent’s guilt, and carry the weight of the failures of every adult around him, including Lucien’s. He makes a point to avoid bringing up Nyx’s pain in front of him; he knows what it’s like to see pity in all those who look at him. If not for the eye, then for his homelessness. Nyx is home now. They just need to help him feel like it.

“If it really bothers you, you can make it up to him.”

“How? Is there anything he likes?”

“Well, that’s the best part. You get to discover all of that with him.”

The first nights are difficult. Nyx’s nightmares turn to terror more often than not. He doesn’t always scream, but Lucien can feel the way the shadows in the manor tremble. More often than not, Nesta is there first, having selected a room closest to hers. In her time here, she hadn’t taken a partner, nor did she have children. Lucien notices that the staff is kept sparse too, only when needed, such as mealtimes or peak hours, but no one lives here in permanence. He doesn’t know if it’s due to Nyx’s arrival, or her choice to remain private—a faerie living with humans.

Tonight, Nyx sleeps softly between them. They’d moved his bed against a wall, which Nesta currently leans against. She has a storybook in one hand, and her fingers in Nyx’s dark hair. Lucien had promised to stay on the other edge of the bed, making sure that no ghosts snatch him away.

“He’s so small for his age.”

“He makes up for it in cleverness. You should see him with puzzles.” Lucien smiles.

He catches the way she stares at Nyx’s missing arm; the way she steels herself whenever she helps him change his bandages. The wound has closed, but the area is still sensitive. Nesta cares for him dutifully.

She would have —

She is a good mother.

Guilt makes itself known in his heart; Nyx has a mother and he has no right to think otherwise.

“Have you ever seen them? The monsters he talks about?”

Lucien shakes his head. “But they’re real to him.”

The topic is heavy, and neither knows what to say. How do they even begin to rationalize or accept a child severing his own arm to feed the demons of his mind. Nyx had fought despite his blood loss not to have it reattached, kicking and screaming about the rot. Faeries had started to whisper about the High Lord’s death-touched son, and Lucien resents these full grown nobles entertaining themselves at a child’s expense. Rhysand blamed Nesta, but Nesta hadn’t killed Nyx. She brought him back.

“You gave him a chance. He’s really wonderful, once you get to know him.”

“I already know he’s wonderful,” Nesta corrects. She has never needed anyone to tell her anything, and Lucien is happy to see that hasn’t changed. “You gave him a chance by bringing him here. You gave both of us a chance.”

Lucien nods, but he doesn’t tell her that the reasons he’s here are entirely selfish. Nyx means the world to him, yes, but he’s so tired. In this place, he sees a chance to rest his head, if only for a moment.

The package finds them across the wall, mysteriously left at their doorstep. It’s wrapped up in beautiful bronze fabric with ribbons, and a note. A gift for the Prince of the Night. Thesan needn’t sign his name; the High Lord had gone out of his way to assist Lucien in his request, putting his most brilliant tinkerers on the job. He’d offered to send one down to help Lucien attach it, but Nyx loathes strangers touching him, so a set of instructions would have to do.

He knocks on Nesta’s door, and softly tells her that Nyx’s gift has arrived. Lucien waits outside Nyx’s door for Nesta who quickly puts on a dressing gown.

“Is that it?”

Lucien grins, and nods. He puts a finger to his lips and creeps into Nyx’s room. The two of them gently wake him. Nyx sits up, rubbing his eyes, one at a time. His raven hair sticks up wildly, and Nesta instinctively helps fix it.

“It’s here,” Lucien places the box on the bed.

When he’d lost his eye, Lucien had hidden behind the shield of an eyepatch. It was a terrible disguise, drawing more attention to it than he was ready for. The prosthetic eye had meant the world to him, it made him feel whole once more. Some people stare, but he takes pride in how dashing it makes him seem. He likes to think Nyx will feel the same comfort.

Nyx kicks off his covers, his face still as serious as ever as he reads the note and unties the bow. The wrapping is pushed aside, and beneath lies a metal case. Opening it reveals the greatest gift of all: Nyx’s smile. (It’s beautiful, it’s so beautiful.) A myriad of emotions crosses his young face, all of which Lucien has never seen so vividly. It clenches his heart, and makes him melt.

Nyx bounces over the case, wings flapping as he leaps into Lucien’s arms for a tight hug.

“Thank you! Thank you,” he says, the second one more muted.

“You need help putting it on?”

“No,” Nyx says with the utmost confidence and hops back over to dig inside the box for instructions.

Nesta squeezes Lucien’s shoulder appreciatively before leaning over to read the instructions with Nyx. It requires a bit of magic, but before long, both Nesta and Lucien are tilting their heads and watching a mad genius at work. Lucien had severely underestimated Nyx’s brilliance.

The last thing either of them expected was for the ten year old to lock himself in his room for days on end, taking the arm apart. Nesta herded him to and from the dinner table, but once he finished the bland human food (which he has not complained once about), he’d dash right back upstairs.

“Are you sure he’ll be fine alone?” Lucien asks, looking towards the staircase.

“You’re welcome to stay. Are you sure it’s healthy for him to be taking apart Thesan’s gift?” Nesta cocks a brow. She’s wearing a cloak with a fur-lined hood. On her arm, a simple weaved basket. Most of their food is delivered to them, and taken care of by discreet staff. When she goes to the market, it’s for her.

The house is nice, but Lucien would very much like to stretch his legs and keep her company. If Nesta says the manor is safe, then it’s safe.

“Nyx, we’re going out! Do you want anything?”

“Auntie Nes has my list.” Nyx’s voice is as serious as ever. If not for Lucien’s faerie hearing, he wouldn’t have heard a thing.

“The important thing is that he’s happy, right?”

“Right,” Nesta smiles.

Even after the war, the humans have not learned to accept the existence of faeries. The wall exists, no longer a myth, but a welcome barrier between two worlds. Faeries are treated as monsters—as great omens of danger—this far South. He doesn’t trust the humans and their fears and based on the way Nesta pulls up her cloak, neither does she.

Lucien watches as she speaks to the merchants. Her smile is kind, but her words are sharp. She bargains like a queen, focused on her goal and undeterred by any pleas made by her fellow villagers. She is a wonder, finding everything Nyx needs in a single spot for less than a copper.

“If it’s money you need, I’m more than happy to transfer you some, my Lady,” Lucien teases.

“I have money, that does not mean I intend to squander it.” To make up for her hard bargains, every winter, she makes sure to send a gift basket to the families that have extended her their kinship. Without her sisters, her father, her nephew or her mate, Nesta only has this forgettable town and its little people. She will outlive them; Lucien sympathizes with her on that very thought.

“Let me,” Lucien offers, taking the basket from her.

Nesta regards him for a moment, more than capable of carrying her own things (and Nyx’s), but she relents, handing it over to him and carrying on his way. She pauses at a small table with handcrafted jewels, a little girl sits behind it and smiles eagerly. She tells Nesta all about how she and her mother made them. Her crafts are the beaded bracelets, and her mother made the pretty necklaces.

“Let me,” Lucien repeats, grinning, and buys three bracelets along with a simple silver necklace.

“You don’t have to soften me up, Lucien. I was never going to ask you to leave. You can stay as long as you like. No need to play nice.”

“Who says I’m playing?” He pauses, waiting until they move out of earshot of the humans. “The way you left—”

“I was banished, Lucien. Let’s not pretend otherwise.”

“It never sat right with me,” he continues anyway. “I think if you had stayed, it would have helped.”

“How so? You recall what they said about me. Death-touched.”

“That’s what they said about him, too.” Lucien says softly.

They pause at the fountain, and Lucien holds up the necklace. Nesta bows her head, and he carefully places it on her without jostling her hood too much.

“Has he spoken about them with you? The ghosts?”

Nesta’s silver-blue eyes regard the emissary carefully, as if unwilling to divulge this secret. “He doesn’t see them when he’s with me.”

Lucien is very rarely incorrect in his assessments. He gives her a look because saying that he’s right would be… rude and he was not raised to be anything but a polite and noble faerie. He asks for her hand and wraps a bracelet around her slender wrist. His touch, featherlight on her skin.

“Why did you buy three?”

“I thought we could match. The blue one is for Nyx.”

“He’ll complain it’s not black.”

The two of them laugh softly. Nyx rarely wants to talk about his parents, especially his father, but he is so much like Rhysand. If not in demeanour, then in appearance, only wanting to wear the colours of the Night. They continue walking, stopping at whatever little stands interest them.

Upon their return, Nyx has not moved from his relentless focus on his new arm. Pieces are scattered around the room, and they know not to disturb his perfectly chaotic organisation.

“I have your things,” Nesta informs.

“But first, a bath. You stink,” Lucien tells his nephew.

“No, no, I’ve almost got it perfect.”

Nyx has been saying that for days now. Lucien had even offered to have Thesan send someone, but Nyx had rolled his eyes, informing Lucien that he knows how to put the arm on, he’s just making it better. Lucien has no idea what that means, but it does not excuse him from bathing.

The Autumn faerie swoops in, picking up Nyx and hauling him over his shoulder. Nyx yells, but erupts in muted giggles. Nesta steps aside, smiling at them both. Lucien glances at her and grins. Happiness is a wonderful contagion.

After Nyx’s bath, Lucien rewards him with a bracelet which the little Illyrian ties to his new arm that he will eventually start wearing.

Lucien and Nesta are given strict instructions. Sit in the parlor. Wait. The two of them keep exchanging glances, curious as to what their child has in store for them. Nyx has been hiding in his room for months, but his demeanor has been focused and happy. He accepts the thought of homeschooling from both Nesta and Lucien, but he must have his tinkering time. It is of the utmost importance.

Their knees touch, and Lucien mumbles a soft apology, which only makes Nesta knock her knee more fiercely against him in a bold tease. There’s no need for such politeness after all this time. They’ve seen each other in less, bursting into their child’s room, looking for monsters to defeat.

“Uncle, Aunt,” Nyx says formally, walking into the room.

He’s eleven now, and slowly, but surely filling out more. He’s still smaller than most faeries his age, which was why the Illyrian warriors were content in using him as a training dummy. The little ones must earn their place, High Lord’s son or not.

Nyx’s hands are tucked behind his back, but Lucien can see the peak of a black shoulder. He’s finally put the damned thing on.

“Behold!” Nyx throws his arm into the air, striking a pose with his legs spread and chin tipped up. “I have completed my modifications.”

Nesta and Lucien clap. Lucien goes as far as sticking his fingers in his mouth and whistling his excitement. This moment has been long awaited. The gift was meant to be used a year ago, but if it makes his boy happy, then so be it.

“Please, uncle. Calm yourself.”

“My apologies,” Lucien says, unable to hide his smile. Nesta elbows him.

Nyx looks at each of them, and snaps with his metal hand. Over each finger, a kernel of magic reveals themselves—a tiny star for night, a flame for autumn, a bloom for spring, a swirl of water for summer, and a snowflake for winter. There are more Courts than fingers on his hand, but Lucien understands the point. He sits on the edge of his seat, looking at Nyx in awe.

“You did this?”

Nyx nods.

For months, they’ve been trying to hone his magical ability to help make up for what he lacks in physicality. No tricks, tips or attempts have worked. Lucien is no spellweaver, but Nyx’s magic felt like… like a tangle. Everything that’s been packed into that small body was ill-fitting, and yet, Lucien can see the change. Not only in ability, but in the way Nyx interacts with the world.

He encourages Nyx as the child puts on a show for him and Nesta, showing him what the power of a real High Lord looks like. Playful, wondrous and truly magical. He watches as Nyx makes the plants inside the house dance with him, and Lucien has to excuse himself.

Compose yourself, Lucien, he reprimands, gripping the washroom sink. He can hear Nyx’s voice all over again. Calm yourself, uncle.

Lucien thought he wouldn’t live to see the day; he thought he would have left long before it happened. Nyx used to cling to him, whispering thoughts of death and quivering from ghosts he couldn’t see. Just an infant who’d grasped his handful of words, he’d managed to craft the most haunting confessions. If he wasn’t already dead, then he was going to die. To say that it was not difficult would be a lie. He knows, he knows how terrifying it must have been for Rhysand and Feyre. He feels it too, perhaps to a lesser extent.

He splashes water on his face, trying to hide the relief spilling from his eyes.

“Fuck,” he swears under his breath, and ends up folded over the running water, laughing alone.

They’re all safe, alive and happy.

Lucien returns to them once he has calmed himself, smiling at Nyx who has taken to sparring with Nesta in the living room with makeshift swords. Nyx, the serious, unsmiling and seemingly un feeling boy is having fun. He flops on a nearby couch, commentating on the display of skill before him.

The excitement tires Nyx out sooner rather than later who sprawls across their laps. Lucien’s arm is extended behind her, across the back of the couch. Nesta toys with Nyx’s hair.

“It feels like a dream,” Nesta says, looking down at the sleeping child. He doesn’t look comfortable at all.

“Unbelievable.”

She hums, shifting her attention to look at him. “Thank you for trusting me, and bringing him here.”

“You deserve to be in his life more than I do. You saved it.”

“Some would say I cursed it.”

“And they would have the misfortune of being wrong. Look at him.”

Nesta leans back, she leans against his arm. Lucien cups her cheek, caressing her gently.

Their life is imperfect; they are the oddities and the spare parts of their families. She will never be queen, and he will never be a High Lord. The nights are still difficult for Nyx, and he won’t entertain the thought of school, if only to learn how to speak to others.

“Lucien,” she whispers and he swears, he swears he hears her unspoken request.

“Lady Nesta,” he answers, a damn clever fox.

“Shall we put Nyx to bed?”

“Of course,” Lucien smiles politely, too used to rejection.

He picks Nyx up and takes him to his room, Nesta in tow. They tuck him in with a kiss from each of them. They close his door with great care.

When he turns, Nesta is standing too close, looking up at him. She smells like vanilla from her earlier attempts to bake. Unsuccessful, but another good memory slotted into the annals of his mind.

“Good night,” he says softly, part of their routine.

“Emissary Vanserra,” Nesta says calmly, touching the lapel of his blouse. “If you do not kiss me after a day like today, I will ask you to leave.”

“Of course,” he grins, and presses his lips against hers.

Home is a manor in the human lands, filled by three faeries that do not belong—neither here, nor there.

Home is a tiny madfae who tears apart every piece of machinery that ticks to understand it, then makes it better.

Home is an unlikely partner with harsh edges and a soft, soft lips.

Lucien is finally home.

#my fics #lucien vanserra #pro lucien vanserra #nesta archeron #pro nesta archeron #nyx johannes archeron #lucienweek2024 #lucien week 2024

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