#again! but this time it'll be real
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Today is the closest we've ever been to TMBG's show in London on November 17th. By which I mean that last year it got postponed on 4th September so starting today it's closer than it's ever been and now it's even closer.
#73 days!!#starting to look up flights and stuff too... :3#again! but this time it'll be real#yeah i have a pretty good memory for dates btw#i mostly rembered about this because of the band posting about how the australia shows start in a month#and for a moment that information didn't register as real to me. it's still may as far as i'm concerned#how has it already been a year!! anyway. exciting.#goosepost
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hate to be cynical on main but it really do be like this every single time a new "not like social media" art platform comes out of the woodwork and then people migrate to it in droves just to find out the only other people using it are other artists that they're competing with for any scrape of viewership from an increasingly oversaturated internet that didn't exist when we were teenagers in 2009
#idk who needs to hear this but deviantart wasn't all that#i know because i was there LOL#people got doxxed and hate crime'd on DA all the fucking time#that feeling of having a 'tight knit community' that you miss was just weirdos on the internet having a good time talking to each other#and a lot of people were also having a real BAD time#nowadays every online conversation is quietly prefaced with the expectation that it'll turn into a new follower or shop sale#so people just aren't willing to invest in long-term community building anymore just for the sake of having a community#it's just “will this site help me grow my career?” no the fuck it won't no single site has ever done that for anyone jfc#the internet was also just a lot smaller back then#you were a “big deal” if you had even just 100 followers#sorry to those who aren't ready to hear this but we can't have what the internet was in 2009 again#enshittification
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#this is one of my favorite pokémon of ALL time. this is one of those pokémon that#when it first came out‚ i had such a Visceral reaction to. i couldn't get over this fucking dog. and i still can't#THEY CAN'T FUCKING SEE!!!!!! AHJGSAKDGASJGDSKCGAJVCKABCKB#i love it SO much it's so fucking. cute. it's so fucking cute. so happy to see that blue haired bitch in the sv dlc having one#DAS IST MEIN BABY. I LOVE IT. lord this is the best. gushing over this dog#while also listening to discO-zone for the first time in a Long time#which is one of my favorite albums of all time. right next to probably vylet pony's cutiemarks and the things that bind us#and burn pygmalion from the scary jokes#there you go. there's my music taste lain out flat. kinda all over the place but discO-zone is one of those that i've loved since i was#a real youngin. and i just rediscovered it last night and UUUUUUUGGHHHH IT'S SO GOOD#MUSIC!!!! AND DOGS. feeling GOOD this morning#by the time this posts‚ it'll be like. two weeks later. but past me was feeling great when she posted this#about to start shiny hunting pawniard for a friend's birthday. technically getting eggs as i write this#wish me luuuuck..! it'll probably be his birthday by the time this posts. lemme check#oh yeah this is gonna post two days After his birthday. hopefully by the time this goes up i've already got the pawniard#HI FORGOT TO TAG THIS ONE#hisuian growlithe#hi from the future again lol his birthday was like a month ago by this point because i ended up queueing up this guy before all the gmax#forms. i totally forgot them. and this whole time i've been queuing them up and shoving them Above this guy. so it was even longer ago#that i queued this guy up at this point. teehee!
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wanted to doodle more orbs and figured I'd adapt one of the fun sequences of events from my recent group cosplay, whereupon @nymphofnovels may or may not have become briefly (and accidentally!!) impaled on my prop weapon
#in my own defense the lance did Not actually come to a real point due to the fact it is a Prop#the fact she ran into it with enough force to Draw Blood was the most impressive feat#anyways i've been looking for a good excuse to draw that interaction since then lmao#kirby#galacta knight#my art#doodles#comic#cosplay#kinda?? that tag is really only for me to find this later#i Cannot decide how to shade these guys next time i draw them you can bet it'll be a different style yet again#anyways 3rd panel gk is the best i've ever drawn them#ghgh it's Late again#hubris
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My god..... The way you draw Charles has me drooling all over the place...ALWAYS KICKING MY FEET AND TWILING MY HAIR WHENEVER YOU POST CHARLES OR ERIK ON HERE
HEHEHE thank you so much !!!! i can only try to capture the beauty of these lads to the best of my abilities, so im glad it seems like ive been doing a fine job so far :]] !!
#snap chats#i wake up i think about erik lehnsherr and/or charles xavier and i throw up and cry theyre beautiful chat ...#and with saturday approaching ... FINALLY ... i may draw them again ....#honestly i thought today was saturday but no ... tis only friday.. the weekend is just beginning and i have so much i wanna draw#i will not have time to draw it all and while that makes me want to eat gravel i am excited to draw what i can#i hope you all come to like what i draw tomorrow as well i hope it'll be a real treat :]
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almost january which means it's almost st sebastian's feast day which means it's almost light yagami's death day which means it's almost february which means it's almost valentine's day which means im six months behind on all of my projects
#ough i have so much to do and then also real life stuff that makes me want to curl up and die but i really gotta get my applications sent#out n stuff so i know what the fuck im going to be doing with my life before the not knowing kills me#but anyway i have a few things planned that i'd like to get done soon but the biggest one is prolly gonna be valentines day bc like#the cards i did last year took me TEN MILLION YEARS to do and i'd like to make them nicer this year and also i have more mutuals#but i think it'll be fun i think i;ll just have to start much much earlier this time around tho#ive found ive become rlly taken w valentines day since getting on tumblr i like doing valentines things i mean i used to do those irl too#but i like drawing themed cards 4 ppl on here and then getting to send them all it's fun#and i have other projects n i wanna participate in some events (much less than last year tho im thinking One piece per event so i dont#fuck myself over again) and i should rlly get started on kinktober things. might seem early but writing takes me foreverrrrr#and i'd like to have at least one fic done for it that i feel completely happy with#whatever i just have much to do fandom-wise. and also much to do not fandom wise but if i think about it i'll start crying so im thinking#about fandom things#also btw if anyone knows of any new dn events being set up lmk so i can add them to my calendar i think i have all the big ones and their#potential/planned dates set up but i like to know everything forever
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One of my favorite space facts is that Pluto does have an atmosphere but only for another half decade or so.
#This is because it will soon leave the hottest part of its orbit#And the atmosphere that it does have will freeze out#It'll be back again in another ~250 years next time it hits aphelion#Things in the outer solar system move *real slow*#But when you tell people without that context#They rightly assume you mean that it will be gone forever as of five years from now#And they get very suspicious of how it's such a specific and near window#Which is usually the point at which I tell them the context
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oooooh ive got The Itch (remake blog Once More)
#ive had the itch for a Minute but i'm gonna go to the shop and then Start The Process i think#i'll post about it again once its done for the mutuals !!! it'll be a new url bc i grabbed a cute one#and in my defense i have gone Over A Year on this one so it is really the time#shoutout to those who have put up with my blog hopping over the years ur the real ones !!
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I was in a major car accident yesterday (got t-boned) and was very luckily a) alone in the car, as the passenger side got walloped and b) not injured. However I took care of everything and then went home and proceeded to sleep for 19 out of the following 24 hours.
#I could feel all my muscles and all of them were in pain. every ounce of my energy was sapped#I needed to eat but the thought of eating made me want to puke#I had to be driven home and I was sat in the front seat like 😵💫🫥😱 why aren't you BRAKING you need to BRAKE every two seconds#After my 24 hour reset I am now up to eating a meal. I still hurt but only the top quarter of my body instead of all of it.#I can stand the thought of being driven now but idk how long it'll be before I'm OK with driving again 🙁#I have been thinking about it like. all the time which sucks. Unfortunately my tolerance for processing negative experiences is -1000#If something bad happens to me I want to just fix the situation and move on from it immediately#and that just doesn't happen in reality. But now I'm stuck sitting with this awful experience for who knows how long :(#I'm lucky our insurance is so good it'll cover everything (but deductible obvs) and I imagine the car is fixable#All in all I'm incredibly lucky and I know that and I'm so grateful to be healthy and home with my husband and cat#But also I've had my license for 8 years and never had an accident. I've been through so much this year. This car is 1.5 months old#It just feels so unnecessary and evil for this to happen now and I feel so guilty that apparently I'm at fault#and caused this huge financial and energetic drain for my lil family when we've already dealt with fuckin everything else the past 6 months#The ''why me why today why when I'm a responsible driver'' is real and my whole shit is rocked. I'm still shaken up#I've had a few times recently where shit felt... unreal? Like I should be able to reload my save because that couldn't have just happened#And this was so vividly that way#I'm strong but like. The Cursed™️ vibe is very present#May have to do a curse break and many protection spells soon#cause this is getting ridiculous#personal
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why did you shave the side of your head? i ask because i almost never see people my age with the same hair cut as me
(i liked the g1 venus monster high doll alot, among other pedantic things)
this is such a funny ask bc i hadn't thought abt it till now but. despite not being Super Into monster high when it was huge, i remember staring at the venus monster high doll in toy mags and in stores and being absolutely obsessed with her design. i still think it slaps. but. idunno. other than that, a lot cool folk i know have it, i like it, so i decided i wanted to have it also P:
#my head is currently pretty evenly hair'd after i cut it real short#but im planning to grow it out again#maybe do an undercut instead of a side shave this time#or smthn fun#we'll see#rn it's a blessing to be back to minimum hair maintenance tho so maybe i'll keep it short!#the world is my oyster and hair always grows back#which is to say. You Also should do whatever you want forever with your hair. if you regret it- it'll grow back. chop it and start over.#if youre feelin spunky with it get a wig. style tht. have fun.#(im planning on getting a few wigs for funsies)
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I think online mutual culture is killing some of you
#it has been for a long time#you don't owe anyone a follow#and people don't owe you that either... and regardless if you're friendly with them ie interacting constantly or not#these are real people you don't know very well and that is FINE!#if someone doesn't follow back that doesn't mean they hate you... and you shouldn't be self conscious about it#it's ok! you don't have to be scared of embarrassing yourself by reblogging something you like#you shouldn't be terrified of getting unfollowed or vagued or anything at all. and most people aren't mean about it#and you can interact with someone positively without following them or vice versa#like at the end of the day none of this is real#again it's different when you are actually friends and even if you aren't it's nice to just follow and interact i know! i agree#but there's this obsession with mutual followings that used to be even more prevalent on here#it's moved to twitter for the most part i feel but it'll still be here forever.#unfortunately for some people being online is just playing a game of Not Getting Unfollowed#and in case anyone gets scared this isn't a vague post this is just something i notice a little more every day#kinblr was obsessed with this especially and now that it's dying out i see this substantially less but its presence is still overwhelming#and i'm not saying DON'T care about people. it's fun to have mutuals you're just chill with but you know#don't get in over your head about it! you shouldn't be obsessed with cultivating the ultimate online persona just to appease everybody#but also go dm that mutual. make friends. talk to people. shyness and paranoia will steal your life away#and if you don't click it's no big deal. there's always someone out there for you. i promise this is true. +you can still follow each other#nobody makes follow forevers anymore. free yourself#and if we're mutuals i care about you! but that goes for everyone else too#once again this isn't me trying to diss anyone i just think some people take the follow button too seriously
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You know what I love?
(and by love I mean am emotionally crushed by?)
We've now seen Vax and Vex's connected threads of fate severed. They're on different paths now, not fated to always be connected, because now Vax's fate is directly tied to the Matron of Ravens (to death).
And you know what else?
Vax is the only one in the opening who doesn't see or react to the thread of fate. All of Vox Machina does, save him.
Vax is the only one who won't have the same fate as the rest of his friends and family. He's destined to be on a separate path from the rest of them. Vox Machina gets to stay together. They're all connected. No matter how much he may want to be, Vax doesn't have that connection. And one day, he'll have to walk away to where his thread of fate leads him to. To the Matron. To death. To divinity.
Without his family.
....I think I'm gonna go lie down now.
#the legend of vox machina#tlovm#tlovm spoilers#critical role#critical role spoilers#vax'ildan#the champion of ravens#the matron of ravens#the raven queen#*GROSS SOBBING*#they're all connected except for him! they all get to stay together#EXCEPT FOR HIM#IT'S SET UP SO WELL#between this and the multiple visible separations between the twins in the first three episodes#they're making it so clear theyre gonna end on different roads#and that vax's is completely separate from them and they'll lose him one day to it#(and it'll be a long long time until they can all be together again after that)#i think i need to stop thinking about sad things#there's too many of them in fiction and in the real world and I don't care for it.
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it's hackathon week next week and there are so many things i need to do (passport renewal, accommodation stuff, dental appointments, packing for flight, chores, etc), so i apologize if i'm kind of inactive or off in this blog or discord!!
#rin rambles#cw vent#tw vent#i'm ngl i'm starting to stress out haha#eating is such a pain sometimes i wish they invent a pill you can just take and it'll give you all the exact nutrients you need ugh#i keep forgetting to have dinner for the past 4 days n haven't had the energy to wash my hair for 3 days now#but it's fine we good we're chugging on#i'll hopefully have some time to breathe on the weekend since monday is a ph#but my god i'm dreading the hackathon sm haha#mostly bc i have never talked to the people assigned into the team with me AND everyone is in US timezone#so i have to stay up late from night to morning to collab with them#and i really don't like that haha but what can you do when it's work :))))#and then there's the new landlady's shenanigans...... i dont want to think about it.............#lets try not to get your paranoia make you break down again meirin#anyway#that got venty real fast i better put a warning#sorry for the negativity lately i'm just so tired#venty............. venti......... hey guys what do you call it when venti vents- /smacked#there now that wasnt all negative hahah
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I haven't been involved with coaching for almost 3 months now and somehow I am still getting dragged into the drama.
#personal#move back to your small hometown they said#it'll be fun they said#me chanting over and over again:#if you live here you get to see your family all the time#(this is a good thing for me i love my brother and his family)#dude honestly this whole thing is just hilarious at this point#anyway newest drama is that one of the parents thinks it's suspicious that i 'quit' the same time my best friend moved away#the shit that is being said about us right now??? fucking wild#i haven't told any of those kids why i really left because they don't need me to be gossiping about their current coach to them#that would be so unprofessional of me#i say like she wasn't spreading rumors about me to THEM directly last year#we are all in our 30s here why are we acting like fucking teenagers still#i'm about to be real petty when i go visit next week though#'oh my god you won't believe what i heard crystal is telling people at her salon'#to the coach not the kids lol#i have a sneaking suspicion that the she is involved in this gossip in an adjacent way not directly#and i want her to think about the shit she says before she says it#she's mad that i don't want to coach jv when i told her multiple times i don't want to run my own program#and that i'd be happy to help her out as an assistant coach but that having to deal with parents is my worst actual nightmare#see what's happening right now#literally the only reason i applied is because i love those kids and they were all freaking out about my friend leaving#because they thought their current coach was also going to be leaving#and i was like hey i won't leave you guys don't worry#it's her fault that she chose not to include me in any of her brainstorming for next year#if she really wanted me to be involved she would have been talking to me about it back in april#i'm literally barely pulling myself out of my grief hole about losing coaching#and i could have stayed around but i would have been miserable#because it wouldn't have been in the capacity that i really wanted#oof okay i feel a little better after venting a bit
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guys i am trying Really hard not to have public opinions about of this morning... pray for me
#i work really hard not to do that. genuinely. every single time i reblog a meta or post my own opinion or write more serious tags#it is Vetted#i keep these things to my friends & my discord & such on purpose because. because. it's better for everyone#but im hanging on by a thread today i guess :')#for now.... just.... people need to remember that when youre debating fiction like this#the characters are fictional but the people listening aren't#and you can cause real fucking harm by talking about demographics the way people have been#rowan chatter#(if i see someone fucking say ray can't love again i'm going to kill. it's directly to murder i will be committing crimes)#(AND if i see another implication that he should've had to get sent to prison it'll be arson also)#fuck you all you dont get to have ray anymore. im taking him he's in my pocket now#do people even know how rehab & therapy fucking WORK#okay. okay. okay okk okokokkok mission failed a little#but we're far enough down in the tags now. reblogs are off. don't eat me
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do you ever feel casually suicidal? like you're not depressed or anything you're doing fine but also it feels like a convenient option
#if you can't make connections with people or be seen by anyone then like. at least you can feel like you're helping a better cause#to like charities and gfms and anyone else#but you have to tone that down bc you're slowly losing money bc you still can't get a job#and bc you don't have a job it means you're just stuck in the house all day. which gives Way Too Much opportunity to Think about everything#and also so like. i still share a room with my sister but it was fine bc she'd stay at her bf's a few nights a week#but he's got a job that's a bit further away and basically she can't go round his as much. so now it's maybe like once a week#the room is getting messier so it gives me less energy to do anything#you can get really into an unhealthy weight loss obsession bc at least it feels like you're getting towards something#but idek is set weight theory real? bc once i get down to a certain point it suddenly resets#like honestly counting calories and donating money to every gfm i saw and writing a film script was what kept me going#but first one isn't working and second i need some sort of income and third is finished and i have no way of actually creating it#and then there's the whole lack of stable hyperfixation and ability to find new music i enjoy#and realistically what would fix me is having a good job that i enjoy and somewhere to live on my own#but until i get a job that's currently impossible. and even then it probably won't feel like enough#my entire life is lived on my phone i need more physical objects but i don't have enough space#bc i share a room with my sister. it's like all my problems are connected#and i have enough optimism that i still think it'll get better in the next few weeks. maybe i'll be able to get a job and that'll#get everything going again#but at the same time i could easily just die#I've graduated from uni. I've seen the who live 3 times. I've crashed my car twice. I've watched 30 years of corrie. I've met various dogs#what else is there to do with my life honestly#(<- joking)#but yeah like. in summer 2021 i almost got suicidal (it was just letting the occasional thought linger in my mind etc)#but that was bc i was so depressed#but now it feels like i could just kill myself. but more just out of convenience#idek. i'm not gonna kill myself. bc i have a job interview on tuesday. and just in general i won't#but there is this casual feeling of like. well i might as well. i can't describe it#ramble#suicide tw#weight loss mention
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