#aftermath of brainwashing

[furiousgoldfish]

Did anyone else have this bizarre experience of trying to calm down/reassure yourself before you're about to enter a social situation, but the words you're saying to yourself in the mirror are 'You look human, nobody can tell if you're not, you can pass as one of them, nobody will be able to tell if you're something else'?

Because I'm thinking back on multiple times I did this, now realizing how badly I was brainwashed that I really didn't believe myself to be human and had to double check to make sure I looked like one of the humans so nobody would be able to clock me as whatever my parents said I was.

[abhainnwhump]

Pet Whumpee screaming, kicking, and crying as Caretaker and their friends drag them away from Whumper's dead body. Whumpee wants to stay with them and leaving feels like betrayal.

[snakebites-and-ink]

Augusnippets Day 1: Gaslighting/Hypnosis/Brainwashing

CW: Brainwashed whumpee, referenced captivity, slavery/trafficking, dehumanization, emotional whump

Caretaker had found Whumpee. 

They'd been co-captives before. For a while, they’d only had each other. Whumpee was always the more actively resistant of the two, struggling and spitting vitriol at their captors.

Yet Caretaker had been the one to make it out first. Their captors had always seemed to have more of an interest in Whumpee.

Whumpee was being sold now, advertised as a weapon of some sort. Caretaker’s heart ached for them at that. But they’d rounded up enough money and were going to get Whumpee out of there at last.

When Caretaker was closer, their gazes met. Whumpee’s eyes lit in recognition, but…not much else. Not hope, not fondness. Maybe they just didn’t dare get their hopes up.

Caretaker was as tense as they could be, but successfully bought Whumpee.

They kept up their role as a normal buyer as they left, and Whumpee seemed to play along. When they were far from prying eyes, Caretaker dropped the ruse. “I got you out, like I always promised I would. You can go, and be free now, at last!” Caretaker smiled.

“I don’t need freedom, sir,” Whumpee said, still acting as they had when they were sold. Suddenly Caretaker doubted they’d just been faking to get out.

Caretaker’s smile faded. “You always used to fight so hard. Don’t you want to go free?”

"The malfunction has been resolved. I won't resist anymore, sir."

Caretaker swallowed. They studied Whumpee searchingly, worried. “Do you really believe that? The whole ‘weapon’ thing?”

“Of course, sir. That’s what you bought me as, isn’t it?”

[pianokantzart]

Nastasia's brainwashing taking someone's evil side and bringing it to the forefront? That's fine, sure...

... but what if it's not the evil part of you that gets amplified so much as it is a twisted version of who you desire to be?

Paper Luigi has shown signs of desperately chasing a sense of perfectly-earned pride. He wants to be a hero like his brother! He wants to do grand, daring deeds and inspire awe in everyone around him! As Mr. L? Wish granted! You're a completely self-absorbed jerk who doesn't need to so much as lift a finger before feeling like you're better than everyone else.

On the flip side, what about a Mario who wishes he could be a bit more emotionally vulnerable, or openly express his worries/frustrations, but feels like he can't without troubling those around him? But as Mr. M? Wish granted! Mr. M is nothing but a big bundle of emotional vulnerability who is consistently spewing his thoughts and feelings all over the place.

You feel me? You see my vision here?

[corrupteddoodles]

insert funny caption

[alejandramelody]

Oh no

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[advluv4life]

I got on here with a purpose and then immediately got sidetracked by The Sunshine Court. Luckily my purpose also has to do with The Sunshine Court.

Jean and Kevin's relationship is obviously complicated, while they care about each other there is obviously pain and a level of betrayal (that was discussed at points in the book) but I don't remember him bringing up in relation to his own feeling how Kevin finding Neil could have in and of itself felt like a betrayal (at least initially).

I just listened to the audiobook for All for the Game like 100 times in the past 4 months but I can't remember clearly the Fall Banquet (I'm pretty sure that was the banquet) when Riko and Jean reveal that Neil is Nathaniel and they ask Kevin why he hasn't tamed him or trained him yet. I wonder how long it took Jean to, assuming that he has, come to terms with Kevin manipulating him to leave, abandoning him to Riko and Tetsuji's wrath, and then also finding his misplaced forever partner... How did he even cope with all that?

I see posts about how Jean talks about Neil and how he gives him a lot of funny nicknames and he doesn't really see him as attractive or anything but how much of that is because of Neil being a kind of enigma to him in the Nest? And I wonder if he was angry and upset with Kevin for finding and also denying him his 'true' partner after leaving him? I also kind of wonder how much Jean actually cares about Neil knowing that he only survived during Christmas break because Jean broke-

' ...what if...'

-you know? Part of me feels like he has him at arm's length because he really can't fathom anything else at this point and I hope their relation/friendship grows throughout the next book.

I've only read The Sunshine Court once, so maybe I missed something but I was driving and I was thinking about this and it hurt so much so...

[artsy-starfish]

Is/was agent 3 self conscious about the scar or did they not care

oh you mean in the splatfest comic? the eyepatch was more of a way to conceal a distinctive trait, can't really be a secret agent if your identity isn't a secret LOL

but to answer your question, they probably were a little bit at first (after octo expansion), but as time went on they got used to it and stopped caring

[calkestis]

finally got the chance to watch godzilla minus one and (1) i am in awe at what they managed to do with this story and these characters and (2) i think i’ve reached a point where i’m not judging the media i consume based on how well executed it is (it has to still be believable, but i can live with many shortcomings) but rather on how curious it makes me feel about stuff; if i find myself wanting to learn about a time period or a certain society or group of people or if i find myself googling stuff related to the characters - that’s a good movie in my book.

[akkivee]

something i like about stage canon is that with the sasasama duet from track 5, it lends itself to the assumption that after their break up the next time samatoki saw sasara was thru radio as he climbed up to stardom and it validates my hc that media was how samatoki found out sasara was just fine without him lol

[furiousgoldfish]

As a kid, I used to believe that everyone had it worse than me, and it wasn't a self-imposed point of view. I was informed on a regular basis that I was lucky and had no idea how horrid life was for everyone else. I also was told how nothing good in life can come without the person paying for it dearly, or without the equal amount of suffering for it. So I always assumed, if I saw someone having it better very obviously, that there was a hidden amount of suffering I knew nothing about, and that would break me. And that I was luckier without that thing. And without knowing with what kind of pain it was paid for.

It was a while after escaping, that I started realizing that not only people don't have it worse by a large margin, but also that most people who have something I couldn't imagine, had it without any pain or sacrifice, but as their birthright. Family, for example. Friends. Human rights. Healthy childhood. Pets that are not used against you. Peers that don't bully, use or take advantage of you. Safety. Money they got from their parents as children, without having to work under horrible circumstances, that they weren't made to feel guilty for getting. And later, being able to work, being able to live pain-free, being able to live without having nightmares, flashbacks, and body that doesn't work. Most of what I've believed was a lie. There was a world of people who had things I couldn't dream of, who weren't hurt for it, who sacrificed nothing. Who could take it for granted.

It made me feel dreadful, the knowledge of just how disadvantaged, and naive I was. I didn't want to know that I had all of those things taken from me, that I was lied to and had everything I should have had scammed away, while believing that it was the only way. I didn't want this. I didn't feel strong for surviving without everything. I felt empty, robbed, helpless. Stupid.

And once I started noticing, everything became triggering. Seeing people use resources given to them carelessly, seeing them having people to rely on and people who will defend them, made me hyper aware of everything I don't have. Seeing people gently playing with their children would make me feel at ease for a second, because there was the relief that nobody needed to abuse their kids, and then later, I would break down just thinking how much it would mean to me if I had even a tiny little bit of that. If I had gotten one percent of that assurance, attention and gentleness, how it would have changed my entire life. It became unbearable. People became unbearable once the gap between me and them was visible.

So it became easier to be alone. If I don't see people having it easier, I can pretend that what I'm going thru is normal, and it's calmer that way. It makes socializing difficult, but being aware of how othered and different you are, is also difficult.

None of it was something I did to myself, or a result of any of my actions. I've been put into this situation without any way out of it. I know this when I'm alone, I understand I'm like this because of what was done to me, against my will. When I couldn't fight it, or didn't even know how to. I'm not responsible for this. But I do have to live with the consequences. And some of them are not fixable.

[abhainnwhump]

Whumpee is so used to only being allowed to eat when they have permission, they don't eat at all once they get home. They keep hoping Caretaker gives them permission to eat, but they never say the word. So Whumpee waits.

Being ignorant and not assuming the torture was that bad, Caretaker assumes the sweaters are for their insecurities. They don't like their body anymore with all the scars and bruises. That's true, but they don't know how thin Whumpee is underneath. It comes as a complete surprise when Whumpee passes out from dangerous amounts of starvation. Then they have to rush Whumpee to the hospital.

[cadykeus-clay]

frankly I'm so glad tlovm is as popular as it is not bc of anything real. but bc I have some polymachina fic that might come out of the woodwork after like. 4-5 years in hiding and with all the new show viewers I might actually get some real reader activity on it

[communistblackbeard]

why cant this motherfucking continent have normal politics oh my god

[corrupteddoodles]

insert good title

man i just drop whatever writing i create huh

no beta we die like lankmann in the sitcom au ending

mortimer finds alex again

say hi to the brainwash au aftermath

Mortimer had been walking through the forest for hours. For whatever reason, he figured that Alex would be in the woods when they up and disappeared. When they were kids, Alex would disappear into the forest when they got upset. Mortimer figured that still held true into adulthood. Old habits die hard, y’know?

It was reaching dusk, and the ground under his shoes was starting to cool off for the night. It was getting quieter, the only noises Mortimer’s ears could pick up on was the light tussle of leaves, crickets chirping, and growling.

Wait. Growling?

Mortimer focused his attention on the sound of  growling. It was a few feet away, and it sounded like a wild animal was eating a fresh kill. He turned his head around, trying to find the source of the noise. 

There, a little bit deeper in the trees. A humanoid. figure, hunched over an animal. That can’t be them. Mortimer thought, but hey, it never hurt to check, right? He hadn’t see Alex in months, and the worst a wild animal would do is just kill him.

Mortimer slowly stepped foreward, careful to not step on anything that would make noise. He approached the figure, and as he got closer, the moonlight better illuminated them.

Yeap, that’s Alex alright. Hunched over what looked like a deer. Eating its organs like this was the last meal they’d ever eat. From what Mortimer would see, Alex had chopped their hair shorter while they had been missing. 

Mortimer tried not to vomit as he watched Alex rip out what looked like the deer’s heart with their teeth, and with a snarl, gulp it down. Mortimer narrowed his eyes as Alex bent back down for another bite of their less-then savory meal.

“Alex? Is that you?”

Alex stiffened and leaned up. They seemed almost hesitant as they slowly turned around. Mortimer almost gagged when he saw Alex’s face. He was already used to the cracks and the holes in their cheek, but he was not mentally prepared to see Alex with their lower face covered in blood and bits of gore, and their eyes alight with a near-feral hunger. Their coat was unbuttoned, and blood stained their old uniform underneath.

Alex’s gaze softened when they saw Mortimer’s face, their eyes glinting with recognition. They spit out the mouthful of deer and wiped their face with their sleeve.

Mortimer relaxed. If he understood right, Alex recognized him. Alex was the one who broke the stunned silence first.

“Am I fuckin hallucinating? Is that you, Mortimer?”

They smiled as tears welled up in their eyes.

“Is that actually you, Mortimer?!”

Mortimer smiled softly and nodded. Alex’s blood-stained hands raised to their mouth with a short, relieved laugh. Tears started streaming down their face.

“Holy fuck- I-I never thought I’d see you again. I- I don’t even know what to say!”

Alex stepped forward with their arms outstretched, but looked down at their body and lowered their arms.

“Maybe don’t wanna..hug while I’m covered in fresh deer blood, eh?”

Mortimer just rushed foreward and wrapped his arms around Alex. He didn’t even care that they were covered in metallic smelling blood, or that he just watched them wolf down an animals heart. He was just relived that Alex was okay.

Alex’s eyes widened, and they hesitated before wrapping their arms around Mortimer as well.

The two were just relieved that the eachother was okay.

[alejandramelody]

Surprise! :)

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